#and yet people only ever talk about the forbidden cities thing and the keefe thing. wow great job everybody
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whenever i see anti alden sentiment i never see this scene brought up, which is one of the only scenes where alden is a true piece of shit. sophie has trauma attached to drugs which he well knows and yet. he pulls this shit. you're making it mighty hard to defend you right now sir
#and yet people only ever talk about the forbidden cities thing and the keefe thing. wow great job everybody#kotlc#kotlc nightfall#nightfall#kotlc alden#anti alden vacker#<- awful tag btw
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Okay so i got lost in ur blog and i reached the "dark telepathy" post
And i raise u a question and a possibe theory
Okay. So we all know that mesmerizing is bad and dark and blah blah blah
(its my dream talent) (and im talking about grady's mesmerizing btw not keefe's)
So the question is.. how does it work? Like, does it control the muscles that ur mesmerizing or the brain that controls how these muscles work?
(if im correct, which i hope i am otherwise its embarrassing, is that muscles are all controled by the brain, and the nervous system but mainly the brain. So. My point is. Does it mesmerize the brain or simply the muscle?)
Anyways i honestly think that they would control only the muscles. Otherwise, mesmerizing would be all the more dangerous and probably forbidden because if all mesmers can control the brain then. They can stop ur organs. Ur heart and lungs and well all the body, really
They can shut down your entire body.
And idk about you but that sounds an awful lot more dangerous than pyrokeneses (i wrote it wrong i know)
My point is, what if. What if. The actual dark mesmerizing isn't about mesmerizing itself, but rather those mesmers strong enough to figure out the controlling of brains?
Like. Maybe its not correct. Maybe mesmerizing is all about muscles and the brain isnt essentially one. But still. I have been thinking of this non stop for weeks its time i share, people
I don't think it's bad and dark, necessarily, I just think that it's a tool, like all the other talents, easily used for good or evil based on the elf's temperament and disposition towards evil in general.
...I always thought Mesmerizing controlled the brain, which in turn controlled the body. A bit like(here we go back to MHA yet again hehe) Shinsou Hitoshi's Brainwashing quirk, but without the need to activate it via verbal answers/commands.
I feel like that would be more simple, and also a lot harder to fight, especially if you're not aware that you're doing things because your very mind has been taken over by another person's mind.
I'm pretty sure that that is behind the whole reason that mesmers are so dangerous. Because they could stop your heart, stop your brain function, make you do anything they wanted. If a twisted elf without a sense of morality or even a distaste towards blood got mesmerization for their talent, there is no limit to the damage they could do.
There are a lot of restrictions on mesmers, from what I can tell in canon, and I honestly think part of the reason they haven't been forbidden because of how the I think the pyrokinetics ban went over. People probably lit cities on fire when they were told to leave.
The damage that mesmers could do if they were told that they could have their minds broken for using their talents is horrifying. And the thing is, because they're mesmers, no one would ever know. They leave no marks, no scars, no streaks of black charred earth behind them. They work entirely in the body and in the mind, and they don't have to leave a single trace of their presence, if they don't want to.
However, I really like your theory as well, and it makes a lot of sense.
It's a really interesting concept, altogether, and if it's simply a control over muscles, I think that having the skill to extend it to the brain is completely possible. I wonder if that's the extent of your power, and you're oftentimes pushed to reach that extent, especially if you're being mentored.
A thing I read on the internet, just now, because I always have to check myself with the Keeper Wiki, is that people with strong wills can break the control of mesmering over themselves. It's very rare to be able to do that, but it is possible. This would make sense if mesmering could primarily target the brain, just like how strong minds can fight off telepathy(presumably).
I really like this idea, and it's super cool, as well as how it could literally have been pulled straight out of a psychological horror series! Thanks, Shannon, for making us think really deeply about the awful things this could spell for people!
#kotlc#kotlc grady#kotlc mesmers#mesmer#kotlc mesmer#kotlc headcanon#kotlc theory#thanks for the ask!#kotlc theories#very in depth analysis#imma need to think about this for a while#hehe
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Finding Home
A/n: Hey this will be a multi chapter fic with a bunch of different ships and characters in it (expect them to all be gay in some way) this is based off of a set of hcs from @linhamon-roll as always this was betaed by the lovely @bookwyrminspiration and I am extremely grateful for faer help! (Also if you guys like this enough tell me if you want a tag list for it, @everyonehasthoughts whoops posted this one instead)
Tw: talk of nightmares (if there’s more please tell me)
word count: 2760
Chapter 1: Back to the Beginning
Breathe.
“I’m not going to the upper levels,” the words spilled out of her mouth before she could stop them. Wide eyes stared at her from all around the room. She managed to count three breaths before the inevitable outburst.
“What?!” Grady shouted. He’s not angry at you, she reminded herself, just surprised.
“Are you kidding?” Fitz whispered in confusion.
“You have to go to the upper levels. How else do you think you’ll become a part of society?” Alden said in his perfect no-need-to-worry voice that just made her want to smack him more.
“Sweetie I know it’ll be new and it’s normal to be scared-” Edaline started before she cut her off.
“I’m not scared okay? I don’t give a damn about being a part of society, and no I’m not kidding. This is my decision,” Sophie snapped. She was so done with this, with the stares, the names, being “Sophie Foster” and “human-raised”, a “war-hero;” she just wanted to be no one again. Maybe that made her a coward, but that’s who she was.
“Sophie, you’re not making sense,” Alden said, shaking his head, smiling that horrible venom-filled smile that barely contained the storm. Ever since she’d learned what Alden had done to his family she’d hated him almost as much as the Neverseen. Because he and Cassius were the same, but only one paid for it.
“Did I not speak clearly enough for you?” she asked, letting the hatred seep through her words and relished in the surprise on his face. “I am not going to the upper levels. I am not staying here either. Here I’m always going to be Sophie: the Moonlark, the leader of Team Valiant, the war hero. That’ll always be me. Here I’ll be stuck picking up the council’s mess for my entire life and I wanna be a kid still.”
“So what do you plan on doing?” Biana spoke up after a silence.
Breathe. “I’m going to go back to the Forbidden Cities, I’m gonna go back home.”
The uproar came back twice as loud as before. She was hit with hundreds of “no”s and “you can’t”s and the occasional “that’s illegal” but in between it all she locked eyes with Fitz. They didn’t need to be Cognates to understand what the other was thinking. She held his gaze and didn’t back down, this was her decision. Fitz smiled a bit at her stubbornness and nodded slightly. There wasn’t any danger from him, no “You can’t do this!” Nothing that the boy she used to know would do.
He’s different now, Sophie realized, how had she missed it?
Her eyes drifted to Biana who was staring at the middle of the room with a blank expression. It was like she wasn’t there, lost somewhere in an ocean of thought. Finally, she looked up, “It’s your decision Fos-boss.”
A hundred times before those words had been directed at her. When deciding the fate of the world she was always plagued by uncertainty. But for once, it felt right; she was going home. Alden and her parents would say no as many times as they could to make her stay, and Fitz and Biana would try at some point, but one way or another she was leaving. She’d be back eventually, but for a while, she wouldn’t have to be Sophie Foster.
The next night they had gathered everyone. Well, not everyone, just the people she cared about. Della and Livvy stood off to the side and Sophie smiled at their intertwined fingers. Maybe, just maybe they would be fine without her. Keefe stood quietly, his face blank, and it made her rethink everything. But Linh placed a steady hand on her shoulder and she was back. Stay focused, don’t lose it, Sophie told herself sternly.
Grady and Edaline watched her, and she wondered how the house would feel without her. She took a breath and turned to Dex. He, out of all of them, wasn’t quite ready for her to leave.
“I can’t make you stay, can I?” Dex asked. His voice wavered slightly and there were tears in his eyes. There were tears in all their eyes.
Sophie shook her head slowly, “Not this time.” Everything was in place, all she had to do was just leave. That was the hardest part. To make it real.
“C’mon Soph, we did it; it’s over,” his eyes pleaded with her. “Let me come with you.”
They had all tried this. In different manors, in different ways, except for Linh. All she did was wrap her arms tightly around her and squeeze like she would never let go. Some part of her, buried under many many layers of protection, knew that if Linh tried she could make her stay. “That’s the problem Dex,” she had said this so many times before, “We are always going to be fixing things and we’re always going to be fighting, and I am always going to be Sophie Foster the human. I just want to be normal, for a few decades that’s all. I’ll be back soon, just make sure to keep these idiots in check while I’m gone alright? I gotta do this alone.” Her voice caught on the last word as it dawned on her that it might be the last thing she would say to them for a long time.
Dex wrapped his arms around her and squeezed, picking her up slightly. “I’ll miss you dumbass.”
She nodded mutely into his shoulder, “Likewise asshole.” It’s time now. She stepped away, flash drive in hand, because if Dex couldn’t join her he would always help her. And she loved him for that.
She turned away from them. She dug her heels into the dirt and braced herself.
Three. Linh’s hand left her shoulder and she could feel all their eyes on her.
Two. It wasn’t the first time she had done this. It was teleporting. It was in her bones, literally.
One. Dex sucked in a breath in sync with her. The feeling of the tension running through her, becoming her, was intoxicating.
Zero. There’s no looking back now. And she ran. Her feet pounded the ground, her heart seemed to get faster with every stride. Dirt bounced with every thud of her shoes and she was free. And she jumped.
Falling. Floating. Landing.
The stale, polluted, stiff air greeted Sophie on the other side and she had never been more relieved to step into a broken world. Her broken home. From now on, she’d be Amilia Ruewen and that was okay.
“The hell you doing here kid?” an old woman stared her down from behind the counter. She had wrinkles; on her face, on her apron, on her surprisingly steady hands that held an outrageous stack of plates.
“Uh,” Amilia said nervously, “I need a job.”
The woman’s dark eyes narrowed further, “And you came here.” It wasn’t a question.
“That I did,” she muttered, it took every bit of her not to yank out her eyelashes.
With a huff, the woman set down the plates and walked out from behind the counter to march up to her. Amilia swallowed hard as the woman grabbed her hands from her sides. Her stark white hands seemed too pale and clean in the older woman’s dark hands. Amilia felt like she was under a microscope, like this woman could see every bit about her life as she stared at her hands.
“You’ve worked, you’ve fought,” she said quietly, and dragged her eyes up to hers. “If you can clean you’ve got a job.”
Something exploded inside her and couldn’t’ve been happier. But wait, “No cooking?” Amilia called out as the woman went behind the counter again.
She chuckled lightly, “Clean first, then we’ll see. Chop chop, it’s almost time for the rush and these tables still haven’t been washed.”
“I don’t even know your name ma’am!” Amilia realized suddenly.
“You want a name, new girl?” she said. fixing her with another hard stare, “It’s Mari, you’ve got a real name?”
Amilia closed her mouth tightly, “It depends on your definition of real.”
Mari let out a harsh laugh, “Less philosophy more cleaning.”
A smile tugged at her mouth as she caught the wet rag the woman tossed her.
By the end of the day, she had been introduced to the regulars as nothing more than “the new girl”. She had scrubbed the counters over and over and Mari still managed to look unimpressed. Her sweeping skills got corrected and she became more familiar with the crappy sink than she would’ve liked. If you turned the old fashion handle too far right, then the water was basically boiling. If it was too far to the left, you got ice. There was one temperature that was decent and it was not moved from that spot. Amilia had found that out the hard way.
When Mari flipped the paper and probably homemade sign from “open” to “closed”, she flopped down on one of the booths. She was tired and wiped, but it was good because she was happy. She couldn’t have done this in the Lost Cities. And she wouldn’t have done this in San Francisco. Because this was normal, and no one knew her name, and that was the opposite of everything she once was.
“You going home yet kid?” Mari asked from the lightswitch. She hadn’t thought about that, where she’d stay for the night. The booths weren’t optimal but they would work.
“Can I stay here for the night?”
“In these shitty booths? Not happening,” Mari responded, shaking her head lightly. Amilia’s heart fell to her stomach and Mari sighed at her probably pitiful expression, “You really don’t have a place to stay?”
Amilia shook her head. “Fine, come on. You can borrow my couch for the night.”
The night turned into two, to a week, to a month and eventually Mari stopped asking about her family.
“We’ve all got secrets,” she’d say, and Sophie wondered what her secrets were. Mari stopped asking about where she was going too.
“This is a pit stop town,” she said one night while they put away dishes.
“It wasn’t for you.”
“It’s where you find yourself when you’re young and get pulled back into when you’re old and broke.”
“Maybe I’m finding myself,” Amilia said only to get a hum in response.
The words that Mari had said when she first met her came to Amilia often. Could she really tell what she had gone through? Or was it some weird old lady thing she did to freak her out?
There was one night where the nightmares came back worse than ever. She woke with sweat soaking her shirt and barely breathing. There was soft clinking in the kitchen that sounded too much like throwing stars. She remembered how they felt in her hands, drawing her own blood as she cleaned them. The sweet release as they left her hand to make a soft thunk in her target. How the rush it gave Sophie was always followed by a thick sense of dread. Because if it made her excited, how far away was she from the monsters she fought?
“I thought it’d be a rough night,” Mari said leaning on the doorway.
“How did you know?”
“You’ve fought wars, those don’t go away easy. Come, I brought sugar, thought you would need it.”
So she stumbled her way into the kitchen, tired and trying as hard as she could to keep her tears in. Mari had pancakes and shakes and had brought them out to the front porch. The best thing about this place was you could see every star in the sky.
“How could you tell I’ve fought?” Sophie asked. The shake was shockingly cold against her hands and she tried to stop the shiver that ran through her. Mari rocked back quietly like they had all the time in the world to watch the stars move.
“You have the look in your eyes.”
“But you looked at my hands, why?” Somehow, the shake tasted like mallowmelt. The kind that Edaline would make on bad nights before tucking her into bed.
“Because your hands have been everywhere, they can tell stories if you let them.”
She decided not to ask any more questions, every answer would just be more confusing than the last. “And because they look like mine,” Mari finally said quietly.
“Oh.”
Mari didn’t look at her while she talked, “I saw a kid, who looked lost as hell with no immediate future, who had the hands of a fighter and eyes that held secrets. I thought I could do right by her.”
“I think you did,” Sophie said. For real this time, she wasn’t Amilia, she wasn’t trying to be her sister, for this night under the stars, she could be Sophie.
Over the year Amilia sometimes forgot about the demons that haunted her. Her past life- lives. They were not her anymore. Days and hours where nothing other than the simple act of flipping pancakes and washing tables were her only thoughts. The town was small and out of the way. No glittery castles and fancy houses. Only small farms, sketchy strip malls, and home. There was only one hint that she wasn’t human, the small leaping crystal around her neck.
“For emergencies,” Biana had said placing it gently around her neck.
“And when you’re ready to come back home,” Fitz had whispered against the top of Sophie’s head.
So it stayed around Amilia’s neck, night and day; a reminder that she never had and never would belong. But she wanted to; she craved it. And Mari made her feel somewhat normal.
She wanted something human. Something reckless and young, that was the human she wanted. Sitting at her computer at the table in Mari’s old yellow motorhome that had housed her, she found herself looking at colleges. When she was younger “college” was an expectation, perfect grades, perfect words, perfect scores. Sophie didn’t get to decide her future. To put it simply, it was never an option, her years were already filled with other’s ideas. But as Amilia clicked the tab for courses she realized that for once she controlled her next small forever. And in her next small forever she could just maybe belong.
Tables had been washed, the sun had gone down, and she had flipped the frayed sign. She had thought about it all day, the college she chose was far away and she didn’t know how to tell Mari this. The woman had become much closer to her than she thought she would. So as she grabbed her small packed duffle bag and held the door handle she tried to ignore the sharp pain that hit her chest. It only got worse as a soft voice came down the hall.
“Amilia?” Angie, Mari’s “friend”, whispered down the hall.
“Go back to bed, I’m just grabbing some things,” she said, wincing at how well she lied.
“That duffle says otherwise young lady,” Mari appeared seemingly out of thin air. Sophie knew this wasn’t going to end well, the feeling cemented itself as anger flared white hot in her stomach.
“‘Young lady’? Sorry did ‘kid’ just get thrown out the window? What are you now, my mom?” she snapped.
Mari gapped at her for a second, “Oh I’m sorry, right now I guess I’m more of your mom than whoever had you and left you on your own!”
“You don’t know nothing about them!” Sophie shouted. She didn’t mean too and she hated the way Mari flinched. But Sophie had pushed them away and that wasn’t their fault.
“The hell is this all about Amilia? You wanna go, go. Just don’t be a coward and leave without a goodbye.”
The tears fell fast down her face, because it was all too familiar. And she had never wanted to leave Mari like that. But she was angry, and that never ended well. “Fine, you want a goodbye? Goodbye.”
The door slammed hard behind her, and the rain soaked Sophie’s jacket mixing with her tears. It felt like a crappy hallmark movie from the early 2000s, but she was too angry to care; About the rain, about how muddy her shoes were, or how she didn’t really know where she was going.
The next morning she regretted everything. But by then that bridge was ashes in a stormy ocean; there was no going back. She moved forward because she had to.
#sorry about the chapter title I just thought of it-#kotlc#finding home#sophie foster#multific#tater writes#kotlc fic
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biana coming to terms with her sexuality: a short fic
(cw: internalized homophobia due to a heteronormativity)
when biana came in sophie’s room at alluveterre late at night, rubbing her eyes and saying, “uh, can i ask you something?” in a soft, nervous voice, sophie wasn’t surprised.
this had happened with nearly every one of her friends. they would appear in her room either at night or during a period of downtime, looking like they were possessed by an idea that they couldn’t get rid of. they’d ask if they could ask her something, and sophie would say, “of course.” usually the question was something pertaining to the human world. dex had asked once if humans really had been to the moon. keefe asked if it was true that humans had schools specifically for art and music. fitz asked if humans’ minds could break and what they might do if someone was struggling mentally. sophie would answer, and the friend would stand there contemplating for a few moments, whisper a quiet “thanks,” and then leave. this had almost become routine, and sophie had actually been waiting for biana to come it at some point.
what did surprise sophie, though, was the question that biana asked.
“is it true that in the human world, you can get married to someone of the same gender?”
sophie blinked. she had never heard any elf say anything about the lgbt community, as it was called in the forbidden cities. she hadn’t even known that it was even a concept that existed for elves. “um, yes,” she said. “not everywhere. some humans think it’s sinful and treat people really bad for it. but in the country where i’m from, i think they just legalized it a year or two ago. and there are pride events for people who like the same gender or are transgender- if you don’t know what that means, it’s when someone is born as one gender but their mind doesn’t match up to it. why do you ask?”
biana didn’t reply, and at first sophie thought she was going to leave. instead, biana walked over to sophie’s bed and sat down next to her, not making eye contact. she twisted her fingers over and over again, her usual nervous habit. sophie became increasingly worried that she was going to break a bone. “elves don’t have anything like that. i’ve never known a boy who liked a boy, or a girl who liked a girl. when you get your match lists, there’s no question asking you what gender you like. i know because i’ve secretly looked at alvar’s. why?” she murmured. “why isn’t it an option for us?”
sophie turned to look at biana, who was still gazing down at the floor. it was hard to tell in the dark room, illuminated only by a few weak beams of light from where the door was cracked open, but she thought biana was blushing. she thought she knew what biana wanted to tell her, but sophie didn’t want to scare her off. “elves seem weirdly obsessed with genetic diversity and having children,” sophie offered gently. “that’s what the match lists are for, right? so it would make sense that same-gender couples aren’t considered in the lists. or,” she added, “maybe elves just don’t have that in their genes, or maybe it’s so rare that nobody thinks about it.”
biana shook her head violently. sophie wasn’t sure if she was denying something, or upset, or just clearing her head. she scooted a little closer to her friend, and wrapped an arm around biana’s slightly trembling shoulders. “are you okay?” sophie asked. “is something wrong?”
biana gave a small shrug. the two girls sat there silent together for a moment. finally, biana screwed her eyes shut and blurted out, “i think i might be broken. like something in my head has gone wrong. i know it.” she turned back up to look sophie in the eyes, her face constricted with panic. “i don’t like boys at all. never have. i hope that i will eventually, but the longer i go without liking them the less sure i am that it’ll ever happen.” she paused, and then sighed, and her whole body seemed to sag. “can i trust you?”
“of course,” sophie said without hesitating. “no matter what, i’ll always be here for you.”
“i know,” biana said. “but i’m scared. this is the first time i’ve ever said this out loud. it’s... a lot, you know?”
sophie nodded. she rubbed her thumb on biana’s neck to try to calm her nerves. it was a small gesture, but sophie wanted her friend to know that she had her undying love and support. “i know. it’s okay,” she said.
“it’s okay,” biana repeated numbly. “it’s okay? i don’t think it is. but i’m gonna have to say it at some point so i might as well do it now.” she breathed in to steady herself. “i... i think i like girls. boys are fine, but whenever i see you fangirling over my brother or... or whatever, i just don’t get it. i faked my crush on keefe because i didn’t want anybody to look at me weirdly and he seemed like a reasonable option because lots of girls like him and he would never actually like me back anyway,” she rambled. “but whenever i see a pretty girl, it’s like i freeze up, and i blush a lot, and i want to stare at her all day but i have to look away so i don’t seem weird. i denied it for so long because that’s unheard of here, but i can only hold back the truth for so long. sometimes, i make friends with a girl i like, because that’s all i can really hope for, but ninety percent of the time she just goes after my brother and that’s part of why i was so mean to you at first. i didn’t want to get hurt again.”
she dropped her head into her hands. “i’m so sorry, sophie, you probably didn’t want to hear about this. i know it’s not right and i’m just bad and broken and i’m sorry! i’m sorry,” she cried, her voice quivering and her body heaving with sobs that she didn’t have to hold back anymore. sophie simply rubbed her back and let her cry, knowing how cathartic this all was for her.
when biana’s sobs began to level out, sophie said, “biana. look at me.” her friend shook her head. “please. look at me.”
she slowly lifted her head as if it were the hardest task she’d ever had to accomplish. biana’s eyes were rimmed with red, and sophie could see tear tracks carving paths through her perfect face. you don’t deserve this, sophie thought helplessly. the world should be treating you better than this.
“biana.”
“yeah?”
sophie cupped biana’s face and wiped away a tear. “you shouldn’t be sorry. this is who you are, and there is nothing wrong with you. i know you might not feel like that. but it’s true. and i’ll keep telling you that as long as you need me to.”
biana sniffled. “thanks, sophie. i don’t think i believe it yet, but i really appreciate it.” suddenly, she threw her arms around sophie, and sophie was happy to hug her back. “thank you. thank you so much.”
the two girls stayed like this for what seemed like hours, holding each other tight under the weight of the darkness and the rest of the world. finally, they separated, but didn’t move any farther than that. biana asked, “do you think it would be okay if i slept here with you tonight?” she paused. “wait, no, that sounded bad. i promise, sophie, i didn’t mean anything weird! you can say no if you want. i’m sorry!”
sophie shouldn’t have laughed, because biana was genuinely distressed, but she couldn’t help it. “relax, it’s fine. you can totally stay! i know you don’t mean anything weird.”
biana sighed with relief. “oh, okay. good.”
they sat there on the bed talking about meaningless things for a few more minutes, and then crawled next to each other under the covers. biana was tired from all the emotional vulnerability, and so she began to drift off rather quickly. as she sank into the gentle fog of sleep, biana couldn’t help thinking that maybe everything really would be okay.
(and if sophie and biana woke up in the morning cuddled closer together than was entirely necessary, what did it matter? nobody needed to know.)
#KotLC#lgbt#lgbtq#keeper of the lost cities#Biana Vacker#sophie foster#fanfic#kotlc fanfic#sophiana#lesbian biana vacker#lesbiana#haha see what i did there#sophiana (but like b a r e l y)
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Wonder- Another Solinh fanfic because i’m trash okay
Fitz Vacker wonders.
He wonders many things. He wonders what his family’s legacy really is, behind all the crystals and beauty, behind even the twisted abominations of trolls hiding behind an illusion of light and a perfect reputation. He wonders about his friends, about all their little idiosyncrasies, their imperfections, the quirks that make them… human.
He wonders, most of all, about Sophie Foster, and the secret she hides from him in that dark, discreet, beautiful mind of hers.
And whether or not it’s the secret he wants so badly for it to be.
But after all, Fitz is no fool. He knows there’s someone special that she’s hiding from him- and in all likelihood, it’s either him or Keefe. If he knows anything about the beautiful, mysterious, perfect brown-eyed girl that means so much to him, it’s that she’ll tell him anything- except if it’s in any way romantic.
He tries so hard to get it out of her, every time they train, telling her that Cognates aren’t supposed to have any secrets from each other- which, after all, is true. The bond between his father and his Cognate was shattered after his father refused to tell him about the search for Sophie. And he wants to make sure that doesn’t happen to them.
It definitely doesn’t have to do with the fact that to him, Sophie’s eyes are more deep and mysterious and different than anyone else’s.
Or the fact that she looks amazing in anything she wears.
But Fitz knows patience as well as beauty, and he’ll gladly wait a thousand years until she’s ready to tell him.
Biana Vacker wonders.
Unlike her brother, though, she only really wonders about one thing- love.
She knows what love feels like. For her it was Keefe, and now Tam. It was the boy she’d only exchanged a few words with after school, but loved his eyes and hair and how he never quite looked her in the eye.
Biana also knows what love looks like. She has to- after all, she’d built up a reputation for herself as the matchmaker of the group. She wonders about everyone’s love.
But today, she only wonders about one love- Fitz’s love for Sophie.
Oh yes, he is in love. He tries to deny it, but Biana can see from the way he looked at her, and the way his eyes always seem to brighten when she is around.
And that’s why it breaks Biana’s heart to know that Sophie is in love too.
But not with Fitz.
Biana knows her best friend, and she knows that there is no way Sophie could ever be in love with Fitz.
But not because there’s anything wrong with Fitz.
Because she’s seen the way Sophie looks at Linh when she thinks no one can tell.
She’s seen the way her eyes shine with joy whenever the girl with the silver-tipped hair walks into the room.
She’s seen the red in Sophie’s face skyrocket whenever they share a look, a smile, a hug, even a brief touch of the hands.
Biana doesn’t know what Linh’s feelings for Sophie are, but she still refrains from telling Fitz her thoughts on the subject.
After all, she doesn’t want Fitz’s eyes to fill with misery and longing, instead of wonder and hope, whenever the two stare into each other’s eyes for a training session.
Sophie Foster wonders, too.
Wonders if what Dex said to her- that Fitz and Keefe both have crushes on her- is true.
Wonders if they’ll still be friends when they confess.
Wonders how they’ll feel about her feelings- the ones for Linh.
Because as oblivious as Sophie is to the love of others, she is very much aware of her own.
She doesn’t like it. She doesn’t want to be in love with someone who’d never love her back- but it’s true, and very real.
But even if she does confess, will Linh accept her?
It’s difficult to say… and a risk Sophie isn’t sure she is willing to take.
But for now, at least, she’ll be content admiring Linh from afar.
It wasn’t to say she didn’t want a relationship with Linh. In fact, to say that would almost be insulting.
Linh’s everything Sophie dreams of in a partner- she just didn’t think she’d want it in a girl.
But now here she is.
From the first time she’d talked to her, even when they were underwater at Exilium and Sophie was helping her calm down, she’s always known Linh was special.
She just hadn’t gotten the chance to really see just how much she likes the girl of many floods.
But she knows now.
Truly, the first thing Sophie ever noticed about Linh was her hair.
Not much of a surprise, since the silver tips weren’t like many other people’s hair- but unlike everyone else, Linh’s hair caught Sophie’s eye because of how it made Linh look.
It wasn’t just unusual- though that was one of the things Sophie liked about it- it was almost otherworldly. There was a word to describe it: Ethereal.
Of course, it alone was beautiful, but the effect it had on Linh was amazing.
It hung stick-straight around her neck, like a silver halo. Fitting, since that was what Linh was to Sophie- an angel sent to earth.
That was the first thing Sophie noticed.
And it was all downhill from there.
Next, she began to notice other little things about Linh- the deep silver-blue of her eyes that reflected a calm night over the ocean, the soft pink of her cheeks that contrasted her wiry black hair and made her look like one of those medieval Chinese princesses they had learned about in human history, the way her face flushed when she laughed…
All of these things helped drag Sophie into love. But the thing she likes most about Linh was the way she’s carried herself ever since that day in Atlantis- she looks so confident, striding ahead with more self-assurance than Sophie could ever have.
Sophie never vocalizes these thoughts to anyone. But she studies Linh whenever she can, stealing little forbidden glances at her while they study.
And she knows that, one day, it’ll all come out.
But today.
Today is not that day.
Linh Song wonders.
Her wonders are more simple, though, and she only wonders about Sophie.
But she wonders about her every minute of every hour of every day.
And every time, she comes to the same conclusion:
One, that she loves Sophie.
And two, that Sophie doesn’t love her back.
It’s a harsh truth, but a truth nonetheless.
She knows, from the way Fitz looks at Sophie during their sessions, that there’s something between them. She isn’t sure about Keefe, but she knows that Fitzphie is less of a joke than Keefe realizes.
Even if Sophie doesn’t realize it too, it’s true.
She wishes her heart would stop pining for Sophie, wills the silly, pointless crush to go away.
But of course, when it comes to Sophie, or really just girls in general, her heart never listens.
And it doesn’t help that the fact that she can’t have her only makes her fall more and more for her. Whenever they exchange glances, the stars seem to realign for Linh, and the world suddenly makes sense. The only thing she wants is to be able to tell Sophie all these things.
She wants to tell Sophie that whenever they touch, time stands still, and the whole world blacks out.
She wants to tell Sophie that when she laughs, Linh feels so undeserving of the name Song, and flowers seem to grow underneath her feet.
She wants to say that even a look, a quick meeting of eyes, is enough to break down all her defenses.
That’s all she wants- just the freedom to say what’s on her mind without horribly regretting it.
But she can’t.
She can’t, because Sophie loves Fitz much more than she could ever love Linh.
This thought almost makes her cry sometimes, but Tam always gets there in time to comfort her.
Still, no comfort is more effective than the ecstatic feeling that rushes through Linh’s blood when Sophie is by her side.
The two girls never fully believe that they can be something together, of course, until their first kiss.
To everyone they know, the idea of their successful relationship is a good one- to the two of them, it’s a luxury that they never thought possible before now.
And yet, five hundred years later, they’re still there, and in love, and happy, living in their own house in the Lost Cities, completely aware of what people might think of them in the forbidden cities, but not caring a bit.
They’re still happy, and joyful, and full of hope and love and wonder.
They’re still them.
And that’s what they’ll always be, no matter the odds, or the enemies, or the circumstances.
Just Sophie Foster and Linh Song.
Two girls who had the courage to wonder.
#kotlc#kotlc fanfiction#keeper of the lost cities#solinh fanfiction#I’m really proud of this one actually#remember to leave your comments in the tags!#i wanna know what you thought!
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