#and yeah most of his songs are pretty nuanced but this one is probably more of a sensitive and personal one

[dragomfry]

A very niche rant about loosely related interests (HB vs. Saezuru)

I’m not sure how many of you in the Saezuru fandom are aware of what Helluva Boss (HB) is on YouTube. But for a quick summary… Written by Vivienne Medrano, or Vivzipop on YT, HB is an LGBTQIA+ adult animated dark comedy/romance show that involves the titular main character Blitzø, an imp in Hell, who runs a business called I.M.P. (Immediate Murder Professionals) that kills humans based on the requests of sinners. At the start of the show, Blitzø has a transactional relationship with Stolas, a royal owl goetia, in order to access a book (grimoire) that allows him to go to the human realm and conduct business. Their toxic relationship develops into something more as the series goes on.

The animation in the show starts off great and only gets better as it goes along. Some of the songs are great. The raunchy/dark/sometimes immature humor doesn’t always land for me, but I like the character drama. Imo, the show is entertaining but has very flawed writing. I like it, but I can’t love it, for reasons said below.

Saezuru and HB couldn’t be more different, but they do share some similarities. For example, the main characters Yashiro and Blitzø share quite a few similar traits in regard to how their trauma impacts their personalities and relationships, especially their fears of intimacy. It’s funny because both share lots of profanity, both try to explain away their relationships as transactional, both feel they ruin good things, both even tried invasively videotaping healthier couples because they were jealous of them in some way.

There are many more similarities, but I’m not interested in pointing all that out for this post. Rather, I just want to rant about HB because the way that Saezuru is so competently written makes the flaws of HB even more glaring. I’m tired of how many people in the HB hatedom try to criticize the show for things it never intended to do (e.g. you can’t blame a romance for not being a thriller; you can’t blame Stella for being one-dimensional when she was never intended to be complex), so yeah I’m not trying to do that. I’m criticizing the show for things it tries to do but haphazardly does/fails at. Of course these are just my opinions!

Rant under the cut

Spoilers for season 1 and 2 of HB

Also TW for themes of sexual abuse

In HB, I feel Blitzø is probably the most well-written character in the show because of how his trauma is handled. This vid does a pretty good job of explaining my views on Blitz (actually this person’s vids are all interesting and their compliments/critiques are pretty reasonable and nuanced, unlike other commentators, give them a watch if you like HB commentary). However, with the end of season 2, there are some writing flaws in the show as a whole I just want to rant about.

Sinsmas was a fun episode, but yeah… HB really became the “Stolitz show.” It lost its original premise.

Don’t get me wrong, the character drama can be very interesting, but this vid by Sarcastic Chorus sums up my frustration pretty well. In general, HB (and Hazbin Hotel, actually) want(s) to have their cake and eat it too.

They want all their big, dramatic character moments without having any substantial buildup. Take Blitz rekindling his friendship with Fizz again after Ozzie’s. They resolved years worth of animosity in the timespan of minutes. MINUTES?? Okay sure, it was a tragic misunderstanding, but I would assume it would take more than just minutes to resolve their strained relationship.

They want their main characters to have flaws but they don’t address them with the complexity they need, or they don’t address them at all. Stolas is a good example. Spoilers for the last episode of S2 Sinsmas in the asterisks (if there’s a better way to hide spoilers I’m all ears). //***Stolas basically loses Octavia, which shows that his cheating had consequences. This is good, but as Sarcastic Chorus pointed out, they try to “soften the blow” by making Stolas a victim of circumstance rather than it being a real character flaw of his. I don’t agree that they wrote Stella as an evil character so that Stolas’s cheating is viewed as okay—they clearly portray his cheating negatively—but the blame isn’t really put as heavily on Stolas as it was put on Blitz in Apology Tour (who is more of a victim in their relationship, but that’s a later point)***\\ Also yeah, they haven’t addressed Stolas’s classism or abuse towards Blitz nor given these aspects particular attention to suggest they will.

There are way too many villains after the main characters at once. There’s the D.O.R.K.S, the Cherubs, Striker (my favorite, what did they do to you), Moxxie’s dad Crimson, Mammon, Andrealphus, and Stella. That’s 7 villains off the top of my head. Because there are so many, they are sometimes underdeveloped. Many also don’t feel like an actual threat even though the show wants us to see some as such (Striker, Crimson, Andrealphus at the end).

The show wants to be deep without committing to its themes. One of these being its themes on classism. You introduce a power dynamic between a lower-class imp (Blitz) and an upper-class goetia (Stolas), and there are some good pieces of commentary said (like what Blitz shouts at the end of Full Moon), but the show never really follows through on the consequences of Stolas’s actions. It just touches upon the themes. Yeah I didn’t like Western Energy for many reasons. It made Striker a loser, which is fine characterization, but they wanted us to regard him as a threat and I can’t take him seriously afterwards. Also, Striker being of lower-class like Blitz but demonized for hurting an oppressive upper-class demon (b/c it’s Stolas), while Blitz is made sympathetic, makes for some weird commentary… Spoilers for Mastermind //***But I did like the joke about Stolas getting a less severe punishment compared to Blitz because he’s a royal, even though it was a bit of tonal whiplash***\\

Tonal whiplash. Some moments are serious, and then we get hit with a joke.

Stolas x Blitz (Stolitz) is toxic, with more blame being put on Blitz (the victim). Yeah we know it’s toxic, and that’s fine to write (toxicity can make a relationship more interesting in fiction even if we wouldn’t root for it irl). But the thing is that more blame has been put on Blitz in the show for their relationship than on Stolas. It can be argued that both have contributed to the toxicity of their relationship, but Stolas even more so. Blitz is a lower-class imp while Stolas is a royal, so Stolas making the transactional relationship at the beginning is an abuse of power. Blitz can’t really object to sex with Stolas even though it makes him uncomfortable because he needs the grimoire to make a living and perform his killing duties in the human world. This makes Stolas a sex offender, and Blitz a victim. Additionally, Blitz is always made uncomfortable by Stolas’s infantilizing and perverse comments in season 1–which can be argued to be what Stolas thinks Blitz wants after S2E1–but that doesn’t make his behavior okay and this should’ve been addressed at least once. Why is Blitz blamed and forced to apologize for being unable to accept intimacy due to his trauma in Apology Tour?? Stolas has many more actual behaviors to apologize and make up for, but these aspects have yet to be addressed. Sinsmas is a step in the right direction, but addressing the consequences of Stolas’s actions has been long overdue. I also don’t like how Stolas physically looks more innocent in many situations, even though I like his design. It’s like the writers are saying “Oh no, you can’t blame him! Look how pure he is!” Video essayists on YT have done this topic to death.

Stolitz is underdeveloped. Stolas never really showed emotional attraction to Blitz in the 1st season. Blitz did though, which was interesting and could have led to a complex relationship dynamic. But S2E1 made them childhood friends, so Ig not so much. Again, I’m not blaming the show for the choice of making them childhood friends as bad writing (you can’t blame a story for not doing something it never intended to do). What I do blame the show for, however, is expecting us to care about this relationship so suddenly when they never showed each other real emotional attraction. What does each character see in each other? I suppose Stolas saw Blitz as an escape from his toxic environment (which isn’t real emotional attraction), and Blitz saw… Idek. Their relationship had no real foundation to begin with, which is why I can only like the ship but not love it. I’m not actively rooting for these characters to get together. I see their relationship as more of an exploration of their characters in relation to one another.

Yep, that’s the rant. I’m not hating on HB at all! Again, I like HB, but I can’t ignore these issues.

Basically, I think Yoneda-sensei avoids most if not all of these flaws, especially concerning my last two points. It’s very clear how both Yashiro and Doumeki fell in love with each other. Despite the toxic elements of their relationship, these aspects are not romanticized or ignored (not saying HB romanticizes them btw). You can really feel their pain in not being able to fully express their love for each other, for multi-layered reasons. While we can be a bit frustrated at the relationship’s slow development, we understand that the slow-burn is not for the sake of drawing out the story but for the sake of delivering a realistic conclusion.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Rereading The Fellowship of the Ring for the First Time in Fifteen Years

Ok guys, gals, and nonbinary pals, welcome to the Aftermath. We left the fellowship last time as they were hauling ass out of Moria sans one wizard. At this point we probably still have orcs on our tails, so we have to keep on hauling ass for Lothlorien. Let's dig on in to chapter 6, "Lothlorien."

Not gonna lie, y'all, this chapter was a sloooooooooooooooooooooooog for me. I literally got like five page in, realized I was heckling fictional characters and reading tones that the text legitimately did not support, and had to put the damn book down for a week. Picking it back up...I might still be the problem here, because I know, I KNOW, that Aragorn saying "Farewell, Gandalf [...] Did I not say to you: if you pass the doors of Moria beware? Alas that I spoke true" is not meant to be the world's most poorly fucking timed "I told you so," but I CAN'T HELP IT. I read it as not the complex, nuanced expression of grief and regret and the painful realization that they must go on that it's clearly intended to be, but as a snarktastic "I fucking told you" that even the most cynical are going to side eye.

So y'all are just going to have to bear with me on this, because I know I'm the problem, I can see the intent, but my brain wants to play ragtime on this pipe organ, and frankly, we're not going to get ANYWHERE if I wait until my brain adequately appreciates the work. Sometimes we just have to roll with our inner irreverence.

The pacing at the beginning of this chapter felt very weird to me, because we start with Aragorn trying to chivvy everyone into moving, but then he stops to give an orientation lesson to the reader. And before we even really feel like we've made any progress, Gimli insists on taking a quick break to drag Frodo up to Durin's Stone and Kheled-zaram, which goes about like this:

They stooped over the dark water. At first they could see nothing. Then slowly they saw the forms of the encircling mountains mirrored in a profound blue, and the peaks were like plumes of white flame above them; beyond there was a star, though sunlight was in the sky above. Of their own stooping forms no shadow could be seen.

Which is very pretty and a nice moment, but it does also SUCK THE URGENCY COMPLETELY OUT OF THE NARRATIVE. I know, Lothlorien is meant to be slower than the Moria chapter to give the overall arc some variation and let everyone catch their breath, but we've got orcs on our trail and we're not safe yet! Not that that's going to stop Aragorn from describing yet ANOTHER river (seriously, this man and rivers...) or Legolas from waxing poetic about what the Mirkwood Songs have to say about Lothlorien and its silver and gold winter aesthetic and green and silver spring aesthetic. Which...honestly, I am here for this aesthetic? Lothlorien sounds absolutely lovely. Elf aesthetics in general are kinda my thing, but again, this makes the pacing feel really janky. Especially since Aragorn basically goes, "Yeah, sounds great my dude, maybe HURRY YOUR ASS UP???"

This whole first couple pages feels very "hurry up and wait," which kind of makes Aragorn forgetting that Sam and Frodo are both hurt until they literally fall behind a little bit weird. At that point he does insist on he and Boromir carrying Sam and Frodo, and then breaks out the athalas when they stop to rest. This is also where Aragorn finds out about the mithril vest that saved Frodo's ass. Although uh...the fact that Frodo got hit hard enough that the maille rings were driven THROUGH leather into his side kind of makes me wonder about the physics of mithril. I'm not saying it's world-breaky, I'm saying tell me more about how clearly mithril can flex and distribute force with such INCREDIBLE efficiency that Frodo survived this shit. (Seriously, if any Tolkienites out there have engineering or physics backgrounds, please get in my comments and explain this to me because it sounds cool and I'm an English major, I don't know how STUFF works.)

Once everyone has gotten high recovered thanks to the athalas, they get moving again, and they travel through the night. And this is where we get THIS:

[Frodo] looked at Sting, and the blade was dull. Yet he heard something, or thought he had. As soon as the shadows had fallen about them and the road behind was dim, he had heard again the quick patter of feet. Even now he heard it. He turned swiftly. There were two tiny gleams of light behind, or for a moment he thought he saw them, but at once they slipped aside and vanished.

Y'ALL WE HAVE A GOLLUM SIGHTING. The little dude is following Frodo and the Ring, and when Frodo SAYS SOMETHING to Gimli, specifically that he thinks they've been followed SINCE MORIA, Gimli is over here going "Yeah, I don't see or hear anything, keep moving, halfling." Soooooooooo...I guess we're just going to ignore this for now. Good plan. That won't bite anyone in the neck or anything.

Anywho, we finally GET to Lothlorien, and Legolas is bitching because it's winter and he doesn't get green leaves, Aragorn is just like, "PLEASE let them cover our asses tonight," and Boromir pops up with "Is there no other way?" And honestly? While Lothlorien is objectively the best and probably safest path, I kind of get Boromir's logic here:

"A plain road, though it led through a hedge of swords," said Boromir. "By strange paths has this Company been led, and so far to evil fortune. Against my will we passed under the shades of Moria, to our loss. And now we must enter the Golden Wood, you say. But of that perilous land we have heard in Gondor, and it is said that few come out who once go in; and of that few none escape unscathed."

Ok, elf bigotry at the end there aside...I get what Boromir is feeling right now. Dude is having SERIOUSLY big feelings about being in situations he is not prepared for and honestly is unequipped to handle. Gandalf's magic wasn't enough to save him in Moria, Legolas's elf shit wasn't enough to get them off Caradhras, and whatever ranger mojo Aragorn has is just fucking barely holding their skins together. Boromir is the big man on campus in Gondor, where the number of orcs you can kill is the most important thing, but here? Where the mission is "Keep the ringbearer alive long enough to yeet Ring into volcano"? He's not feeling confident, and he is just a dude with a big sword. I'd be insecure too, and I would also be wishing for a dead simple straight fight, because that's my comfort zone. That's not like...the BEST strategy to go into this mission with, but like, I get where our Gondorian dude's coming from.

And I am way more disposed to empathize with Boromir right now than I am with "let me bathe my feet in this magic elven stream" Legolas at this point. Although Sam's ongoing lore education is VERY well served here, because he's picking up all the Mirkwood and Lothlorien stories, plus the song of the maiden Nimrodel.

Then we keep heading deeper into Lothlorien, and Haldir pops up and gets sassy about how Sam is breathing so loud, they could have shot him in the dark. Which like...really man? BREATHING too loudly? Somebody really likes his dead silence...

Sam's breathing stops being a problem real quick once Legolas explains that they want to bring a *GASP* Dwarf into Lothlorien. Haldir is fully over here like:

"A dwarf!" said Haldir. "That is not well. We have not had dealings with the Dwarves since the Dark Days. They are not permitted in our land. I cannot allow him to pass."

And even with Frodo invoking Elrond and explaining that Gimli has been hella useful and awesome on this trip, Haldir has some conditions:

"We will do this, though it is against our liking. If Aragrorn and Legolas guard him, and answer for him, he shall pass; but he must go blindfold [sic] through Lothlorien."

We're going to put a pin in the blindfold thing, because that comes up again in a minute. What we're going to yell about NOW is Elf racism against dwarves, because WHAT THE HELL? Gimli is a grown-ass adult, and they're not letting him speak for himself, making bargains on his behalf without consulting him, and they're insisting that he's inherently unstable and needs GUARDS. This is just bullshit and honestly I'm not a fan. And...before I yell any more, I am aware that Tolkien was a white male academic in the first half of the twentieth century. The racism could have been a whole lot worse and a whole lot more endorsed in these books, but I also feel that as an academic, Tolkien is a little bit skimming over this stuff, because Gandalf and Aragorn just generally give off the vibe of "OMFG, you people's racism is SUPER ANNOYING and is GETTING IN EVERYONE'S WAY. STAHP." Which...I appreciate the "racism bad" in there, but the vibe also has some MASSIVE imperialist tones to it, so...Augh. I genuinely think that Tolkien missed a chance to talk about race, imperialism, and power dynamics in depth here, but that's an academic paper in and of itself and I...do not want to do that here. I'm sure a Tolkien scholar somewhere has ALREADY done that work, so if you want more on that, go find it there. Basically, Haldir, if you have a problem with Gimli, talk to GIMLI. We can still have Frodo and Aragorn supporting him, but TALK TO THE DWARF.

Anyway. They get their Lothlorien passports and a couple talan to spend the rest of the night in, because everyone needs a bit of a rest here. The hobbits have a minor moment of being deeply sus about having to sleep in trees since they are literally hobbit hole dwellers, naturally, but we do get a little bit of sleep before the orcs show back up! Thankfully though, the Lothlorien elves have this shit on lock, so the hobbits don't have to worry.

Well. Except for how Frodo is still getting stalked by Gollum:

He was almost certain he could hear stealthy movements at the tree's foot far below. Not Elves; for the woodland folk were altogether noiseless in their movements. Then he heard faintly a sound like sniffing; and something seemed to to be scrabbling on the bark of the tree-trunk. he got up and crawled to the opening and peered down. He stared into the dark, holding his breath. Something was now climbing slowly, and its breath came like a soft hissing through closed teeth. Then coming up, close to the stem, Frodo saw two pale eyes. They stopped and gazed upward unwinking. Suddenly they turned away, and a shadowy figure slipped round the trunk of the tree and vanished.

Frodo, sweetheart...tell someone when creepy pale eyes are stalking you. You KNOW that Gollum literally ate babies, this is not a Twilight scenario. Gollum is not gonna turn Edward on you (at least not outside the slash fics). At the very least though, the elves are good at seeing what shouldn't be in their woods. Haldir pretty much confirms that it's Gollum too, because he says "I might have thought it was one of you hobbits." That's Gollum, guys. ITS GOLLUM. And had someone thought to tell Aragorn, he might have made that connection.

The next morning, we cross into the Naith of Lorien. Remember that pin we put in the blindfold? Time to return to it, because Haldir goes to blindfold Gimli, who VERY RESONABLY goes:

"The agreement was made without my consent. [...] I will not walk blindfold [sic] like a beggar or prisoner. And I am no spy. My folk have never had dealings with the servants of the Enemy. Neither have we done harm to the Elves."

And like...yeah, valid points. However small an imposition on bodily autonomy a blindfold may be, it is still an imposition on bodily autonomy, and one Gimli did NOT consent to. Nor should he have to consent to it if nobody else does and there is, as he points out, no other external reason to distrust him except "dwarf." And it gets shittier because literally Gimli can't even go BACK at this point. It's "take the blindfold or die," which is just WILDLY fucking out of proportion, and given that explicit threat to his life, I don't blame Gimli for drawing axe on them. And LEGOLAS is not helping with his "A plague on Dwarves and their stiff necks."

Aragorn gets like...bare minimum points for asserting that their entire party--Legolas included--will go blindfolded if Gimli has to. He gets an extra point too for his "Now let us cry 'a plague on the stiff necks of Elves!'" when Legolas protests.

Legolas LOSES points for getting pissy about having to wear a blindfold with exactly ZERO self-awareness. Like...Yes, Legolas, the blindfold is demeaning and shitty. That is ENTIRELY THE POINT. And this is at least the second time in this book where a dwarf has made a solid point about racist mistreatment from elves. But where Gandalf was like "fuck it, whatever, move on," Aragorn at least is over here going "fair is fair, you're gonna need nine blindfolds." That's closer to a show of solidarity than Gandalf got, and if it makes Legolas and Haldir uncomfortable enough to REFUCKINGTHINK their position, then all the better.

The fellowship spends like two days waltzing Matilda through Lothlorien with blindfolds until Galadriel sends new orders about losing the damn blindfolds. Haldir doesn't waste time about it, and he personally removes Gimli's:

"Your pardon," he said, bowing low. "Look on us now with friendly eyes!"

...Haldir. Sweetie, honey, friend. AN APOLOGY AND A DECLARATIVE STATEMENT ABOUT HOW GIMLI SHOULD FEEL NOW IS NOT HOW ONE APOLOGIZES AND DOES BETTER AFTER DOING A RACISM. I swear to Eru, I know the early 1900s were a different time, but the high-handed bullshittery here...

This is more or less where we leave it, because the fellowship gets to relax a little here, and hang out "inside a song," as Sam says. They're in a place of safety, and it was a heck of a trip to get here.

That's about where I'm leaving this chapter, because honestly this one was SO hard to get through, SO irritating in terms of the Elves being snarky assholes, and SO weird in terms of pacing. People say the "The Council of Elrond" chapter is a slog, but I'd read that one multiple times before I'd revisit this one. This just didn't speak to me, and I did not have fun. We get Galadriel next time though, so I'm hopeful that this is the lemon chapter in an otherwise good book.

[helluvapurf]

First-Impression thoughts on Hazbin Hotel's "official" first ep, now that I checked it out on YT-

*Spoiler warning below for those who didn't see it yet-*

-Great to see Charlie & Vaggie again, still a wholesome lil supportive pair whilst having their own quirks/things to do on the side. Esp with Vaggie spending the whole time back at the hotel reshooting a whole commercial for Charlie's sake, awww :3

-Pleasantly surprised by the twist of Charlie's mom being the figure she was most inspired by to make her dream come true, along with her love for singing. Curious to see where Lilith's whereabouts could be if she's been away for so long?

-The new voices were... a mixed bag, I suppose? Mainly in the line/tone-deliveries for certain characters (& I guess I'm still moreso used to the OG pilot's portrayals lol), but I can see the good attempts made from those like Charlie & Alastor.

-I... don't know how I feel about the way Lucifer's backstory was handled? Like, yeah its interesting hearing of him & Lilith genuinely connecting over their "rebellious" natures (& thus fleeing from Heaven's wrath/staying in Hell to be together). But then, the whole thing with Lucifer apparently being some "doofy, misunderstood dreamer who only wanted the best for Humanity, got bullied by those mean ol' angels, and didn't meaaaan to spread Sin all across Earth~ 🥺🥺" ...ehhhhh, felt kinda lame imho 🤷‍♀️. Not that I mind giving nuanced/sympathetic angles to a character's development now & then... but with someone like Lucifer (who mind you, is meant to represent the "Ring of Pride" on top of his Hell-ruling duties), I guess I kinda expected more... "bite" to his portrayal, I guess? .3. But idk, maybe that's just me... (*Tho admittedly, one could argue that perhaps he and/or Lilith were simply lying in that storybook to make them look less "bad"... idk, given HB's track record with Stolas' writing and since both shows are made by the same people... part of me can't help having my doubts ^^; *)

-Adam... ooooooh boi .x.;; Ever since I saw his leaked design I've always been rather... "mixed" about him, and now seeing him on-screen & talking I... don't really get the concept behind him? I mean, yeah I'm all for a fun, chaotic-jackass type when done right (hell I still consider Blitz among my faves to this day lol). But with Adam apparently being the big leader behind Heaven's army, AND was even the "original" Adam from biblical times... how tf did he get the chance to be allowed in Heaven if he not only helped curse humanity to sin (aka: sharing Forbidden Fruit with Eve), but on top of him currently being a horny, misogynistic loudmouth? 🤨Discounting that is also the fact that his whole design vibe just... doesn't really give me "holy army leader" vibes, but more-or-less just Blitz in some weird angel cosplay lol 🤷‍♀️. No shade to those who genuinely do like Adam though (and I'll admit his song was surprisingly catchy lol), I just... feel like his whole personality/design vibe could've probably fit better to a fallen angel-type character (or even a demon-angel hybrid if you wanna play more into the Heaven vs. Hell conflict), someone who only takes up the "Adam" title as an ego trip to enact his revenge against Hell... or, something like that idk; my brain's tired lol. (*His sidekick Lute seems pretty cool tho, she kinda reminds me of Tempest Shadow from MLP in a way .3.*)

-Nice to see more of the old Hotel gang again, esp those like Nifty she was a cute :3 (her whole reaction to the camera honestly being a whole mood lol)

-Did not expect to see Brandon Rogers pop up voicing Katie Killjoy of all people, buuuut I guess I can see the amusing comparison potential to that one CEO persona of his lol

....Aaaaaand yep, that's about the gist of my first-impression thoughts atm .3. Dunno if I'll be sitting down to watch the whole season of Amazon's Hazbin atm (*'cause like, I do have Amazon Prime, buuuuut I rarely ever use that to watch shows (save for some classic cartoons here & there lol) .w.; *), but I'd say it was still generally a decent watch for what it is imo👍(+any chance to see my girl Vaggie again, the better~ x3💜)

[justanotherhh]

ramble: thing is, im actually not sold on huskerdust as a romantic couple atm (in future? who knows) but i do like whatever foundations loser baby set up for their general dynamic as a whole and i can work from that with whatever direction the canon chooses to go in, which is proooobably romantic, considering the cues (but again, who knows)

this as a microcosm of general things that at times have me go "hmmm" about the first season, which most of the time (not always, but mostly) comes down to pacing. husk isn't a character with much focus in s1. his dynamic with angel, while not not set-up could be seen as a "yeah, we'll put those two together," rather than feeling totally organic. most of husk's and angel's dynamics before loser baby have been about husk not wanting angel in his space and then not much (anything?) between ep4 and ep8 that wasn't at least partly group-based

i could pick up on other non-huskerdust related things that came out of the blue and went quite quickly, especially in the latter half of the season, where the jump from "six months" to "one month" to "now" felt kind of jarring

but in the end 8 episodes is indicative of general show culture these days where it seems everyone has to fight tooth and nail to even get that much per season, when really hazbin hotel s1 wanted at least 12 episodes in order to have more time to breathe and set up character dynamics not at breakneck speed, and heck, maybe 8 was the original goal. i doubt it though, hiiighly doubt it

all this to say i have a lot of grace for wherever the show does take things if it's trying to push so much into whatever time it's been offered with the ever-hanging (but perhaps slightly less-so post-strikes?) uncertainty of cancellation after 2 seasons. the conditions to create a story and then get that story out there... suck. and it's harder for 8 episodes (or even 12) to hide flaws than a 22 episode season of yore (with its own issues as construct but still... easier to disguise blemishes and take their time)

on the flipside helluva boss seems content to just keep trucking at whatever speed it's on, doing pretty much what it wants to do, but without any Big backing a la amazon and with everyone involved doing 100 other projects at the same time. so... sometimes it does things well, sometimes less-well, but overall just... vibing. 25ish min episode at a time every 3-5 months. granted i haven't experienced the personal pain of that yet, having started it in january, but on it goes and i'll be suffering soon enough

for very different reasons im pretty forgiving of pacing-related stuff that might (has and probably will again) come up in either show. more than anything they've got very visible constraints, so im happy to fill in the blanks with fandom -- for example if huskerdust is written as romantic by the end without developing properly, ive seen ample cool ideas and fanarts that give it more texture and breadth and/or i'll simply look at other things with the characters that aren't shipping them together -- because mainly they're just very fun shows with a bunch of messy queer characters in them, with some great singing and voice acting. the universe of these stories is so open and welcoming to play in, im just in it for a good time

also, in the end, no they're not that deep (except for when they want to be), but they're also a still-rare example of queer genre tv for adults that isn't that deep, but still incorporates relevant queer narrative themes in fun, moving, often complex ways, especially genre tv where lead characters tend to be queer until proven otherwise and this queerness in and of itself is well-written and nuanced. like yeah, i am in it for plots that hopefully stick the landing in the end, but if they don't they were still a very fun, inviting time that had me as a target audience and this a rare privilege to have with a bit of fun fiction

what am i saying in the end? loser baby is a banger, thank you for the song and all the other songs. i think angel dust and fizzarolli should hang and make out and talk about terrible bosses sometime, but the likelihood of these shows having a crossover with all the weird copyright stuff around these days is probably minimal. it's fine. (argh)

(im saying this post also isn't that deep)

[justagaycryptid]

Ngl I/Me/Myself is the absolute WORST song that could have gone viral for Will especially on tiktok of all places because it is an incredibly nuanced song and tiktok users are not particularly known for their understandings of nuance

[preraphaeliteknight]

I've spent a few days thinking about what to do moving forward. It's not the breakup of a celebrity couple that's affected me the most, it's the feeling of losing my safe space in the Tumblr Swiftie fandom. Every time I've logged onto this app in the last few days I've flinched and quickly exited the dash to get away from yet another take mocking and ridiculing Joe. Or minimizing his very valid fears. "Unbothered 3.0". Rewriting history to make the last 6 years seem insignificant. Comparing him to CH as if petty jealousy is the issue here and not years of harassment. Celebrating the return of Taylor Swift, The Brand, no matter what that means for her future happiness. And circulating pressers that make it sound like Joe was a therapy dog who's no longer needed. All of which is making me feel physically ill. For both of them. And even when this stuff isn't coming from the people I follow (who for the most part have nuanced and fair takes), it's coming from their anons. And no matter what I do I can't get away from the outright cruelty and shocking lack of empathy for the person Taylor has credited with saving her life. Even though swifties know better than anyone what Joe has had to put up with for over half a decade. Given that treatment, I suppose it shouldn't surprise me that this is how he's being discarded. But fuck it hurts. So where does this leave me? This blog was never supposed to be an update account or an ask blog. I just wanted a space to fangirl over my favorite actor. But in the last few months this has become a space for Joe fans to be excited for his upcoming projects and clown over castings (remember a few weeks ago when we were giddily figuring out his next movie because of insta follows? yeah, take me back to that please). And I know some of you rely on this blog as a space to both appreciate Joe and vent your frustrations with his unfair treatment. I have 70+ asks in my inbox right now, the vast majority of which are well written, thoughtful takes on what's been happening. And I agree with pretty much all of it. Thank you for taking the time to send me your thoughts. But the truth is, I simply don't have the emotional capacity to reply to them right now. I can't do it. I can't talk and think and dwell on this. To quote a song that's too painful to listen to right now: "I'm just too soft for all of it." So I feel like I have two options if I ever want to be able to be active on Tumblr again: 1. Unfollow all swifties. Because just seeing pictures of Taylor (especially from the pap walk) makes me feel ill. And it's affecting my opinion of her even though I'm mad at her fans, and not her. And I don't want that to happen or the music to be tarnished. But I also don't want to break mutuals and hurt someone's feelings. And I want to know what's going on with Taylor. I'm a huge fan of her too, and I want to be excited for tour and the re-recordings. So that's why I'm going with option 2: Take a proper break. A real one, this time. Hopefully this all won't feel so hard with some time and distance. I don't know if it will solve anything, because swifties will get back to talking about Joe in the future (whenever she makes art about this) and then I'll probably have to flinch every time I open this app again. Because he will have been reduced to yet another ex swifties can make fun of. So maybe I have to go with both options in the end. If I do, I hope any mutuals out there know not to take it personally. I wish more than anything that I could return to the days of being a casual fan who wouldn't have thought twice about any of this. And maybe that's what I need to try to get back to. For my own sanity's sake. I'm sorry to any Joe fans out there who need a place to vent. I feel like I'm letting you down, but I just can't do this right now. Maybe I'll be able to in the future. Maybe I'll leave this blog and go back to my main instead where the subjects will be more varied. I don't know. I'll always be a Joe fan though, and no shitty presser or swiftie narrative is going to change that.

Please just be kind to each other, and to Taylor and Joe. Let's hope the best for both of them, and please please please don't tarnish all the good that this relationship gave them. And all the beautiful music it gave us.

All my love

[peanutbutterex]

tag 9 people you want to know better!

I didn't realize tumbr did this kind of thing too! I haven't done one of these since I was more active on DeviantArt!

Thanks to @givefangapuppy for the tag!

3 ships of all time:

I have so many ships, but I guess the ones that have been most significant and long lasting to me have been...

Zuko/Katara: I remember when Zuko became my favorite character alongside Katara, and I found fan art of them paired together. I thought it was such a great ship that I started liking it more than Kataang, and now that I am older and understand the nuances of it more, I am even more of a fan of them

Usagi/Rei (Sailor Moon/Sailor Mars): Now I have on occasion found the two of them to be pretty annoying, and my first actual ship in Sailor Moon was Makoto/Ami, or Sailor Jupiter/Sailor Mercury. However, after a while there was just something very compelling about Usagi/Rei and the drama of it, how they are at each other's throats like a married couple but still deeply care about each other. Also, Tuxedo Mask never did anything for me as a character, and while I like Seiya, I will always think the true one for Usagi is Rei.

Ed/Stede: My god this one was pretty groundbreaking. My one friend asked our friend group one day in the middle of finals week to watch ofmd with her, calling it the gay pirate show. I thought that she called it that because pirates are often pretty fruity, and I thought it was just going to have a gay aesthetic. Like many others, I thought once Lucius got his kiss from Black Pete and Jim was out as nonbinary that would be it. I had never seen some of the famous queerbait media, but I had been friends with people who had, so I was not expecting Ed/Stede to become canon even though I shipped it. When they kissed I screamed and after I finished the show I went straight to reading fanfiction. Never has a ship caused my mind to be as overtaken as it was from Ed/Stede becoming canon. So yeah, probably one of the most significant ships I've ever shipped

First Ever Ship:

Gonna be honest, it is probably Zutara. My first ships were either Zutara or Torklenz (Peter Tork/Micky Dolenz of the Monkees), but given that I was into ATLA before The Monkees it is probably Zutara.

Last Song:

Given that it was the last song I played in Project Sekai, probably Becoming Potatoes by Neru (the vocaloid version, of course. I am a vocaloid fan first and a project sekai fan second)

Last Film:

I can't remember, but it might have been Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter? I did not finish it because it was a family event to watch this so bad it's good movie, and we have to all finish it together.

Currently Reading:

here is the thing, I don't read books for fun much anymore, especially since I am a college student, but I started reading a witchy book that I am not sure where I put it rn.

Currently Watching:

well, if by watching you mean a list of the shows I want to finish but have not had the energy to, I will give a short but incomplete list:

Harley Quinn

Reservation Dogs

Tokyo Mew Mew

Revolutionary Girl Utena (though that is because I want to finish the manga before I finish the anime).

Currently Consuming:

Water. Hydrate don't diedrate

Currently Craving:

Sleep, which I will get after posting this, and for my major to not require a thesis, which will not happen.

Tagging:

only if you all want to! @midnightwings-pirates @marquise-de-clarabas @blakbonnet @dolenz-harrison-girl @plaudiusplants @bisghetti-o @missbananarose (yes you are like one of my closest friends but I am curious about your answers) @d0-n0t-p3rc3iv3-m3 @gaypir8bois69 @mycroftpedvia

[drwcn]

Hi! I hope you are doing okay with all the discourse going around. Im white and raised in a very white society so i will never have a say in it, but i was wondering, is there any way i can educate myself more in asian/chinese culture? Im aware i consume content thru western lens and because of that i dont really get all the nuances of the shows, but i would like to have at least some backround. Im guessing just watching the shows doesnt give enough of that, can you maybe reccommend some blogs or books to check out? (If you dont thats totally fine and im sorry if i said anything offensive)

Hey friend! Not offensive at all, no worries. Honestly, I’m not too sure. I think just keeping an open mind about things is a really good start. I’m not really sure which blogs to recommend but if I could recommend some dramas? Since it’s probably easier to watch a show then read a book?

《The Story of Minglan》 is a good one to sort of parse out the intricacy of historical Chinese society in the Song Dynasty, keeping in mind that different dynasties have different practices, so even amongst different time periods there were differences. 《The Story of Yanxi Palace》 is another good one for Qing Dynasty (circa 1740s) if you wanna get into imperial harem stuff. (Or you can watch 《甄嬛传》 or 《如懿传》 for harem stuff. I just think The Story of Yanxi Palace is the most palatable, most aesthetic, and most fun out of the three. The other two are kinda tragic?) There are other dramas but I feel they’re not as... accessible?

Chinese historical dramas come in 3 flavours: serious dramas, idol dramas, and those that ride the fence. What I mean by idol drama is...everyone in it is young and hot and the writing is eh and the acting is eh. More often then not there’s a lot of modern elements to it. The Untamed is so popular because it’s idol drama done really well.  (xianxia and wuxia genre used to be more quality when I was a kid, but now they’re kind of ehhhh.) I would say Minglan and Yanxi are both successful because they ride the fence. 

On the other hand, serious historical drama has A LOT of politics and can be quite dry especially if you’re watching it through half-assed subtitles. The actors typically are more seasoned, older. People jokingly say that idol drama is what mom watches and serious drama is what dad watches, and honestly given my parents’ tv habits...it’s pretty accurate 😂.

Some really well known ones from the past 20 years are: 

The 《铁齿铜牙纪晓岚》 series 1-4. I would only recommend part 1-2, 3-4 are not as great. This one has quite a bit of humour but it might fly over your head a bit because of the language barrier. The story surrounds a well known government official and scholar named Ji Xiaolan  纪晓岚, his frenemy and colleague the (EXTREMELY corrupt) prime minister He Shen, and the Emperor Qianlong. For better or worse these three are depicted as both liege and subjects as well as friends. Trying to see Ji Xiaolan and He Shen one up each other while Qianlong tries to balance his court and rule the country is quite interesting. I won’t pretend this is an easy series to follow, but it’s actually quite fun. 

《汉武大帝》 - is about Hanwu Emperor of the Han Dynasty circa 150 BC? He’s one of the most famous emperors of distant history. It’s basically about the course of his life and the many people that featured in it. 

《大明王朝 》- my memories of this one is very vague, but it is about the Ming Dynasty (the dynasty before the Qing Dynasty c. 1500,1600.) 

《The Advisors Alliance 军事联盟》-  2017 two-part television series based on the life of Sima Yi, a government official and military general who lived in the late Eastern Han dynasty and Three Kingdoms period of China. circa 150 AD. 

As a side note, a lot of serious dramas for a while now have been focused on the Qing Dynasty, just because it’s the last imperial dynasty before Imperial China fell into decline, WWI and WWII ravaged the country and communism happened. Even a lot of idol drama are about the Qing Dynasty (I feel like I should do a post about this, just to string things together haha). 

So for the Qing Dynasty, because they are Manchurian, their last name is Aisin Gioro or in Chinese Aixin Jueluo 爱新觉罗. Their earlier emperors are much more well known than their later ones and have been the focus of MANY dramas. (You’ll notice their names in the beginning spell very different than the Chinese names you’re used to, but once they take over China, the emperors’ names start to become more and more mainland Chinese and less and less Manchurian.) 

Nu’er Hachi 努尔哈赤/ Nurhaci - The granddaddy of Qing Dynasty, but was never officially Emperor of China during his life time. 

Huang Taiji 皇太极 - Nurhaci’s oldest son. He led the campaign against the Ming Dynasty but died before the campaign was over 

Fulin 福林, Emperor Shunzhi 顺治 - Huang Taiji’s 9th son. He is the real first Emperor of the Qing Dynasty. His uncle Duo’Ergun 多尔衮/ Dorgon was his regent as well as his commander-in-chief. Dorgon was the one who won the war against the Ming Dynasty and instated his nephew as the Emperor. Fulin was 6 years old when this happened, and now you may wonder why the fuck is that? It’s because Fulin’s mother, Huang Taijii’s widowed concubine Consort Zhuang (name: pu’erji-jite bumubutai  (pinyin) 博爾濟吉特 布木布泰/ Bumbutai Borjigit, Da-Yu’er 大玉儿) remarried her brother-in-law Dorgon. Whether Bumbutai and Dorgon were actually in love is....contestable. Certainly one of my favourite serious dramas that depict this part of history is《大青风云》. 

Xuanye 玄燁, Emperor Kangxi 康熙 - Fulin’s third son. Very famous. Very long reign. Serious drama associated 《康熙微服私访记》， 《康熙王朝》

Yinzhen 胤禛, Emperor Yongzheng 雍正 - Xuanye's 4th son. His reign was highly contested because some ppl believed he forged the succession document. It’s probably not true. He was an efficient emperor but very austere, very severe. Not well liked. The best serious drama about him is probably 《雍正王朝》and the aforementioned《甄嬛传》. The former is 100% politics and a fictional re-telling of historical events whereas the latter is 100% harem drama and 100% made up. 《步步惊心》is an idol drama about a girl who transmigrated back to this time and fell in love with Yinzhen. Lol. 

Hongli 弘历, Emperor Qianlong 乾隆 - Yinzhen’s 4th son. I think he’s the longest living/reigning emperor of Chinese history. SOOOOO many dramas were made about him or set in his reign. Of the serious drama category:  《铁齿铜牙纪晓岚》 that I mentioned earlier is really good. There are others but I won’t name them here.  《如懿传》 is a serious drama about his harem, but really terrible? I really didn’t like it (just my personal view). Incidentally it was released around the same time as《The Story of Yanxi Palace 延禧攻略》which is also about his harem and MUCH better in my opinion, because the actor for Hongli in Yanxi is much better skills-wise. 《还珠格格》was the OG idol drama about Hongli’s children. I gave a brief synopsis about it here. It was made in the 90s but damn...so nostalgic. 

There’s many more emperors after him, but they’re not as important. 

Okay yeah, so I’m not sure if any of this is really helpful, but definitely watching serious drama gives you much better context and understanding of Chinese culture than idol drama. I mean when the drama has flying and magic...the historical relevance sort of falls to the side. 🤣

ADDENDUM: I made a typo earlier. Fulin is Huang Taiji’s 9th son, not Nurhaci’s son. Also Abahai is Huang Taijii’s mother’s name (wikipedia lied to me on this one XD). 

[daydreamhowell]

okay so I'm seeing a lot of people going "I always thought DEH was horrible bc Evan says he knows Connor to get with Connor's sister" etc. etc. without actually knowing the details of how it happens in the musical

disclaimer: I don't actually like the musical that much, I like some of the music but I agree that it gets really repetitive. also, I really only like the music in act 1 (with a couple of exceptions), so I'm really comfortable with the plot at the beginning, but once it gets to the Connor Project, I really only vaguely know what happens. also, like most people, I haven't seen the movie

OKAY let's start with Evan and Connor meeting. contrary to many posts that I've seen, they DID meet each other. Evan goes to the computer lab one day before school to print out a letter to himself - his therapist makes him write these letters, "Dear Evan Hansen, Today's a good day, and here's why....." So as he's printing this out, Connor comes into the computer lab, looking kind of intimidating, but generally being nice to Evan, asking him about his cast, how he broke his arm, whatever. Since no one has signed Evan's cast because he has no friends, Connor signs it in big letters to fill the whole thing up, which is really sweet! it's a nice moment. and then Connor sees Evan's letter to himself, sees that it mentions Connor's sister Zoe because Evan has a crush on her, and Connor gets understandably pissed off. he takes the letter and storms out. for Evan, this is the end of the interaction. it was weird and awkward, but it's done, and his only worry is that Connor might find him and like beat him up over it or something.

when Connor kills himself, his parents find the Dear Evan Hansen letter in Connor's pocket, and they assume it's a letter written by Connor to his secret best friend Evan Hansen. they're overjoyed in the greatest capacity they can be having lost their son, because at least their loner son had a friend, someone to help him through it all, even if he didn't make it through. Connor's parents feel somewhat culpable for Connor's death because they really didn't give him the support he needed, so the idea of Connor having had someone to support him takes a load off of the parents and makes them feel less guilty.

the following day at school, Evan is called into the principal's office. when he gets there, Connor's parents and sister are all there (he probably doesn't even know who Connor's parents are when he first sees them, but he definitely knows Zoe), and they tell Evan that Connor killed himself. and Evan is understandably confused because that shouldn't have anything to do with him. and then they show him the letter and make it clear that they think Evan and Connor were friends, which is corroborated by Connor having signed Evan's cast, and they effectively thank Evan for having been there for their son. and Evan goes along with it, both because of his anxiety and because it would be super awkward for anybody to go "sorry, your son actually didn't have any friends, I met him for the first time yesterday when he signed my cast and then was a dick to me and ran off." the idea of Evan being Connor's friend is clearly providing a lot of comfort to Connor's parents, so Even lets them think that they were friends because that's an action that seems totally harmless.

and then Connor's parents want Evan to be part of their lives, almost as a way for Connor to live on with them, and they start asking Evan all kinds of questions about their friendship. and that's where Evan starts to lie. ultimately, he's still trying to comfort the family by creating stories where Connor was kind and had fun and was trying to get better. in the process, he ends up almost gaslighting Zoe into doubting the existence of the emotional abuse she endured at the hands of her brother, but even for her, Evan is trying to provide an alternate history where Connor actually liked her. it's worth noting that Evan is also trying to sell the lie to himself because it would've been nice to have had a friend. Connor and Evan initially got along when they met, they're both in dire need of a friend, they both struggle with mental illness, and their families mirror each other in the show. if things had gone differently, I really believe that they could've been friends. and this possibility is so appealing to Evan, especially in the song "For Forever," where Evan rewrites the story of his suicide attempt to be a day out with Connor where Connor comes to help him after Evan falls from a tree.

is it shitty that Evan uses this opportunity to get with Zoe? absolutely. was lying at all not the best move? totally, but also he's a teenager who struggles interacting with people, so I don't blame him so much for getting himself in this mess. I never felt like Evan was really at fault for starting the lies, especially since it was such a great source of comfort for everyone involved, and since Connor's parents pretty much just pushed their assumptions on him. he's definitely a morally grey character, even more so as the plot goes on, but I don't think his actions become truly shitty until he starts getting some personal gain with it i.e. the resources of a more affluent family, dating Zoe, the celebrity of starting the Connor Project, etc.

also, I've seen the argument that audiences thought Evan was totally excused from his actions because of his anxiety. this was 2017, peak "uwu smol bean" era, so people online definitely felt that way, but I think critical reception (and like, normal reception by adults) of the musical was more nuanced. pretty much all musical theatre fandom at the time relied on super reductive, black-and-white thinking to categorize characters, so it's no surprise that a show with a more-than-typically morally gray main character would be super distorted by fandom. I've also seen complaints about people shipping Evan with Connor, which, yeah, that was pretty fucked up. since we really only get to see Connor through Evan's romanticized made-up stories about him, it's easy to read a romantic interest into it, especially when "Sincerely, Me" does make gay jokes about them, and also I heard that a lot of people thought the song "For Forever" was a gay love story without the context of the musical. food for thought. anyway it's not a particularly shippable musical in the first place, so pretty much the only other ships were Evan with side character Jared and Zoe with side character Alana. I can understand people gravitating towards the ship of two main characters, even if they didn't actually know each other and it's kinda fucked up

[clumsyclifford]

ok hello i absolutely love all ur fics, you’ve just got a certain quality in ur writing that is just… mmm. yeah so anyway, do you have any advice on how to improve or just how to write?? (especially fic cause personally i struggle with that more than original stuff??)

hello!! that is very kind of you to say thank you <3

advice on how to write. oh boy. oh man. well i can try. i will do my best. i will also try to be brief but we all know how that song goes

update from having finished answering this: alright. okay. this is not only long, but decidedly english teacher-y. i’m sorry that i am the way that i am. this is what you get for asking a leo for writing advice. am i joking? maybe. maybe not. anyway. this post got away from me in a big way so here’s a read more. warning: LONG post under the cut.

1. study your characters. for RPF like the band stuff i write, that literally means watching interviews, watching them perform, seeing how they interact with each other, picking up on their mannerisms (behavior) - what they do with their hands, if they repeat themselves or stutter when they talk, the quality of their voice when they're talking about different things, and so on. also keep track of things they mention a lot in interviews especially about each other - for example jack has mentioned before that alex has an annoying habit of twirling his hair when he zones out. that kind of thing. IMPORTANT NOTE!: you don’t have to use all of this information. just like studying for anything, you collect all the information you can and then you parse through it and use whatever you think will contribute or be relevant to your story.

2. remember that characters are people. or at least they’re representing people, which is an important distinction (see #3). still, considering that your characters are people can be a helpful way to get out of your head. see, characters are supposed to be archetypical, and fulfill a role, and say certain things in certain ways and never really deviate from that. but people are highly unpredictable and behave in random ways for random reasons and have thought processes that are unfathomable. people will just do fuckin’ whatever. if you’re worried that your characters aren’t behaving in a believable way, keep in mind that you’re trying to make your characters represent people, and people’s behavior is justifiable any number of ways. people just do shit.

3. remember that characters are not people. sike! no but seriously, this is just as important to remember. unfortunately, no matter how hard you try, characters are never going to be people. that’s a good thing for stories, though. characters can pick up on nuance in senses that people can’t - they can distinguish between different facial expressions, different smells, different sounds - BUT ONLY INSOFAR AS IT MOVES THE STORY ALONG. in other ways, characters are ridiculously oblivious. you can use this to your advantage. in fact, a lot of the time, you have to. if your character notices right away that someone is flirting with him, then you can’t write a 30k slow burn, for example. characters don’t do that thing humans do where they go “what?” but then halfway through the re-explanation they register what’s been said. pretty much everything characters say has meaning. (by this i don’t mean semantic meaning, i mean significance - characters don’t really just say “what?” because they didn’t hear what someone said, they say “what?” because they can’t believe it or they don’t understand it or they refuse to understand it. characters never seem to run into the didn’t-hear-them problem. must be nice.)

characters can do whatever you want or need them to do, because you’re in charge of them. (sometimes this doesn’t feel true - mine do all kinds of shit and i just have go “well alright then” - but it is true.) they are gears in a story. you decide when and how they turn.

4. dialogue is your friend. i am super super biased here, because i looove writing dialogue. if you talk to sam about this i’m sure she would say that description and narration are the ways to go. but you came to me, so i get to say that dialogue is god. i don’t want to say that dialogue is the only method of communication (i know nonverbal communication is real), but dialogue is the fastest and most effective method of communication, and by extension, the most effective way to advance relationships between characters. now. obviously there are exceptions. if characters are kissing, they’re probably not doing a lot of talking. if they’re trying to be undercover or discreet, they’re more likely to rely on gestures and facial expressions than speaking. if you’re writing a very peaceful scene, you might not want to undercut it by adding a lot of chit-chat. but i maintain that dialogue is the best way to move a story along, for a few reasons. 

first, at least for me, too much description is just tiring. depending on how skillful the writer is (sam), i can read a fair amount before i hit my limit, but unlike in mean girls, the limit DOES exist. you don’t want to over-describe the world (see #5). second, i find that dialogue is a really really good indicator of a person’s character. this is especially true and relevant in fanfiction, which is a lot more character-driven than original fiction in many ways. also, in a sec i’m gonna talk about showing [not/and] telling, which is every english teacher’s bitch, but dialogue is a really good way of showing who a person is and also a good way to establish facts about the universe. you could just narrate and be like “Jack hated waking up early,” and that works and in many cases it’s perfectly legit. but you could also do something like this:

“What the fuck,” Jack mumbled, still half asleep. “You better have a really fucking good reason to be waking me up this early. Like someone better have fucking died.”

and sometimes that’s just a more fun way to say it. (for the record you can also show AND tell here! there’s no reason why you can’t have this line of dialogue and then a line in the narration confirming how very much jack is not a morning person!)

the last reason why i am particularly fond of dialogue is because i am also particularly fond of communication, which is a preference thing. let’s face it, guys: characters aren’t gonna communicate if they’re not literally actually talking to each other. dialogue means talking to each other. talking to each other means solving problems, fixing (or creating) conflicts, understanding each other better. i love communication, ergo, i love dialogue. And You Should Too. 

5. describe the world, but don’t over-describe. i opened this fic earlier and it was like “jack was excited to wake up to go to his first class at the university of baltimore” and i just. i was like is this really relevant. do i really need to know this. and i never found out because i closed the fic but in my defense it was on wattpad and i had only opened it out of curiosity. look. there are three ways to use details in fic. (a) introduce them right away (b) introduce them when they become relevant or (c) don’t introduce them at all. let me give you some examples. 

(a) say your character A (i’m using jack because i’m used to him) wakes up. he’s in his room in his house off-campus. character B (rian) walks into the room. this might be a good time to explain that rian is his housemate. to that point: “show not tell” is a good rule, but sometimes “show and tell” is just as good. e.g.: 

Rian walks in, holding Jack’s Green Day shirt and looking irritated. That’s really nothing new; Rian looks irritated at Jack roughly once a day. Being housemates for a year will do that to a friendship.

boom, now you’ve let everyone know they live together without throwing it in their face, and you’ve also told everyone that these two guys are friends and have been friends for at least a year but probably longer. you showed it by having rian walking in holding jack’s shirt - usual housemate behavior - but you also told it in a subtle way that established the relationship and some kind of history between these two. well done.

(b) sometimes you want a certain detail to make an impact. this is the kind of thing you hold onto and don’t specify, and in certain cases you leave the reader wondering, “well what about x?” and then when you finally explain x they go ohhhhhhhhhh. yknow. the italicized oh. consider the following:

(A)

“Alex is in my bio class,” Rian says, referring to Jack’s ex-boyfriend of last year.

Jack frowns. “So? Why should I care?”

“He’s my lab partner,” Rian says. “I have to spend a lot of time with him.”

“I don’t care what you and Alex do,” Jack says. “But you should know he sucks at bio.”

Rian gives Jack a look. “First of all, that’s not true, he’s incredibly smart. And second, I’m telling you as a courtesy, because I thought you might not want your ex-boyfriend hanging around our house after he broke your fucking heart.”

(B)

“Alex is in my bio class,” Rian says.

Jack frowns. “So? Why should I care?”

“He’s my lab partner,” Rian says. “I have to spend a lot of time with him.”

“I don’t care what you and Alex do,” Jack says. “But you should know he sucks at bio.”

Rian gives Jack a look. “First of all, that’s not true, he’s incredibly smart. And second, I’m telling you as a courtesy, because I thought you might not want your ex-boyfriend hanging around our house after he broke your fucking heart.”

the only difference between these two excerpts (which i just wrote lol they’re not from anything real) is that the second one doesn’t explain who alex is right away. that makes it way more interesting when rian reveals who alex is a few lines later. magic.

(c) take this college au that we’ve established here. where does it take place, you ask? easy answer: it doesn’t matter. you don’t need to say what school they’re at. this will make your job easier, because then no one can fact check you, and it also means you don’t have to decide what school they’re at. but even if you do decide, it’s not usually necessary to say. believe me, you can go thousands of words without ever needing to specify what school they’re at. you know why? because it doesn’t matter. and no one cares. and as soon as you specify in canon that they’re at a particular school, you are bound to be accurate to everything that school does, and that makes your job way more difficult than it needs to be. as hazel once said, work smarter, not harder. 

6. adverbs are also your friend. (yknow, words that describe verbs, typically ending in -ly, like “loudly” or “angrily” or “smoothly”.) ESPECIALLY when it comes to dialogue tags. (dialogue tags are the things you add to dialogue to say who’s talking and how they’re talking - like “he said” or “he whispered” or “he earnestly explained” or whatever). a lot of the writing advice you’ll see nowadays will usually guide you away from overusing dialogue tags other than the classic “says/said” and i STRONGLY concur with that advice. things like yelled, cried, mumbled, snapped - these are very good in moderation, when you’re really trying to emphasize the way a person is speaking. the more you use them, the less impact they have. in most cases, a simple “he said [adverb]” will do. instead of “he snapped” consider “he said curtly/sharply/coldly.” instead of “he mumbled” consider “he said quietly/clumsily/softly.” I WANT TO MAKE IT CLEAR THAT THESE ARE NOT DIRECT SYNONYMS. every word has a nuanced and slightly different meaning and that is the BEAUTY of the english language!!!! all i’m saying is that in many cases, a verb can be replaced with an adverb to achieve roughly the same effect, without making the reader feel like they’re scanning a thesaurus.

and speaking of a thesaurus: it’s not cheating to use outside resources like thesaurus.com to help you come up with words. i fuckin love thesaurus.com. i use that shit all the time for everything. i use it when i’m writing emails. i used it just now to write that last paragraph. thesaurus.com is your BEST friend.

7. grammar. (and spelling but that’s really a given.) unfortunately if i tried to teach you all of the essential rules of grammar this post would exceed tumblr’s previously-nonexistent word count limit. so i’m not gonna teach you any of them. this is just a general point to suggest that if/when you’re writing, have someone you trust, with a good grasp of grammar, look over it. of course it doesn’t have to be perfect or AP style or anything like that. readers will overlook a certain amount of grammar mistakes and every reader has a different threshold. but in general, as a grammar geek and former journalism editor-in-chief, i have a duty to my grammurai code to preach the importance of grammar in writing. good grammar does not necessarily mean good writing and vice versa, bad grammar does not necessarily mean bad writing, but bad grammar makes good writing a lot harder to read, and in some cases will even obscure your actual meaning. so please, have someone read it. for the record this is me offering up my services. i am very good at fixing grammar. i have lots of weaknesses in writing but grammar is one of my strengths. please prioritize grammar. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

***

okay so now that i’ve said all of this shit and pretended to be an expert and embodied everyone’s tenth grade english teacher, let me add one very important disclaimer:

none of this is always relevant.* writing is an art, not a science. you are never going to be following all of the rules, all of the time. you shouldn’t. it’s good to know the basics of constructing a plot, establishing a character, showing and/not telling, moving the story along. but a lot of this advice is really subjective and heavily influenced by my writing experience and habits and tendencies and preferences, and those are simply not generalizable to the world. i am a sample size of one and science dictates that that means my results cannot be statistically significant. i am just some guy. earlier i said you don’t want to over-describe the world. but maybe you do! maybe you’re really into worldbuilding and you want people to know what they’re getting into. maybe you’re like sam, and you just don’t feel as confident in your dialogue skills but you love painting word pictures. i said that adverbs are your friend, but maybe you just prefer to use verbs. maybe you don’t want ANY dialogue tags and you want the reader to interpret the dialogue based on context and content. i said that characters aren’t people and they won’t behave like people, but maybe you’re trying to write hyper-realistic characters. maybe you’re just going for believability over narrative. WHATEVER. the point is, rules are made to be broken. no one is going to have The Answer for How To Write Good because there isn’t just one answer. every single writing rule has exceptions and you can be that exception as many times as you want.

*except grammar. grammar is fucking always relevant.

i hope any of this advice was helpful to you, even though i english teacher-ed the fuck out of it. and for what it’s worth, i approached this as if you were a relatively novice writer, but i know absolutely jack shit about your writing prowess and experience and habits. so maybe you already know all of this and none of what i’ve said is helpful at all. if you have a more specific problem, i would be happy to try and help. if you’re hoping for more specific feedback, i’d have to read something of yours first - but again, happy to try and help. i don’t know if you can tell but i loooove writing and english and grammar and all of this shit and it would be my honor. i have now spoken so long that james madison himself is begging me to shut up so i’ll stop here but thank you for coming by and giving me the opportunity to expatiate a shit ton. and GOOD LUCK i forgot the most important advice of writing which is HAVE FUN LOVE WHAT YOU WRITE AND WRITE WHAT YOU LOVE OKAY BYE

[deltaengineering]

Spring Anime 2021: Embarrassment of Riches

So this current anime season absolutely stinks, which just makes the last one look even more impressive. Well, maybe not all of it...

Zombieland Saga Revenge

First off, you don't need to tell me that the following is a severe outlier opinion. We good? Ok. ZLSR is, in a word, subpar. I liked S1 back in the day, but it was already in the process of getting lazy towards the end. S2 continues this trend and is basically just another idol show. And as someone who actually does watch other idol shows I have to say that it's not a particularly good one of those either. The zombie gimmick has mostly stopped mattering and we're just doing what every idol show does, only with the odd occasional sight gag. The alleged subversive qualities mostly amount to a flashback for Yuugiri, which is admittedly the best part of the show but feels like it barely has anything to do with anything. Apart from that, it's a bunch of generic idol plots, rehashed character beats, shoddy attempts at twists (while not connecting to any setups from S1), and the obligatory "idols give us hope" ending, which is terribly hackneyed and flat out bad. Tae gets further memed into the ground, because of course she does. And there's stuff that was simply never good to begin with, like Kotarou and his comedy schtick, which gets truly insufferable now that there's no qualities to distract from it. It really makes me think that S1 wasn't even all that good to begin with and seems like an attempt to turn this surprise success into an easy money longrunner with no edge and no ambitions. "The idol show for people who don't watch idol shows" indeed, but not the way you mean it. 4/10

Bakuten

But not to dwell on the failures, with the second show we're already above the cut — barely. This one got my attention with its really impressive performance scenes early on and it totally sticks to that, which is even more impressive. But besides that? Well, this is by far the most predictable show in a season where I watched an unambitious Kiraralike and put ZLS on blast for having no ideas. The characters are a mixed bag, some are cool (Shida, Asawo), some are very annoying (Mashiro), but those are the supports. The main cast is extremely one-dimensional, which is fine until they try to heap a ton of pathos on their lead, which doesn't go well. But I guess execution matters, and Bakuten is slick enough to get by. Writing this down in stark daylight I feel like I overrated this show somewhat (I actually put it over the next one originally, which definitely doesn't hold up when thinking about it), but I was indeed mostly entertained. 6/10

Yakunara Mug Cup mo

Yeah. Of course Mug Cup definitely doesn't invent or subvert anything either, but it's a pretty good Kiraralike that's always entertaining to watch. Explaining the qualities of such a nothing genre is as difficult as ever, but it mostly comes down to me liking the characters and it having nothing to annoy me. It's shorter than normal, which is a plus for slim shows like this. And yeah, you can make an excessive amount of dick jokes with the clay fondling. That helps too. Looks are just fine, pleasant but nothing out of the ordinary. Comfy low-effort anime. 6/10

Vivy: Fluorite Eye's Song

This one is decent, but sadly still a major letdown. Because the first few episodes of Vivy were excellent and kicked ass, but then it became increasingly clear that the writing can't cash the checks the ideas wrote while the action starts running into severely diminishing returns. Vivy just keeps slowly getting worse and worse as it goes on, not by a huge amount each episode but by the end there's a pretty sizeable gulf between potential and result. Going into detail would probably be a little much for this venue because there's a lot, but from the top level view the issue is that while Vivy has good fundamental ideas and steals at the right places, it just isn't a smart show — it's schlock, and by the end, poorly thought out schlock that tries to smooth out every problem with liberal application of the big feels hammer and le epic twist at that. Yeah, couldn't tell that the Re:Zero dude was aboard here, for sure. That said, it still works pretty well as entertaining schlock that is not to be taken too seriously, and the characters are generally just very fun to watch even when they're doing stupid things. Still, I can't in good conscience rate this higher than Beatless, a show that looks like butt but properly executes on its ideas. 6/10

Super Cub

So this is 100% a Honda commercial, and I got really mad a Yuru Camp last season for being a blatant shill. Yet I'm feeling this, what gives? I think the main difference is that Super Cub is specifically a commercial for one product (and a very iconic product at that), while Yuru Camp is so all over the place that it ends up mostly a commercial for consumerism in general. And when Super Cub goes too hard on the product (which it does), it's at least pretty entertaining. That's something about Super Cub in general: It goes hard. Your regular Kiraralike this is not, because it's uncommonly slow, focused and moody - yes, it almost measures up to Yuru Camp at its best and demolishes it at its worst. Also, it's just extremely amusing to see sadblob Koguma grow a huge grizzly biker beard and become a badass outlaw dad to her goofy wife and cute daughter, all thanks to the power of afforable personal transportation. Needless to say, that can get unintentionally silly, but Super Cub has so much charm that it doesn't matter — it's great when it's good and still funny when it's not. 7/10

Shadows House

Shadows House turned up with a lot of potential, and I have to say it at least delivered on most of it. It has some problems; notably I'm not a fan of how the entire middle turned out to be a tournament arc of sorts that seems curiously inspired by Resident Evil memes, crest-shaped intentations and boulder punching included. I also think that this is a show that would be perfectly fine without explaining much, but I guess it is a shounen manga after all so we got dumped on eventually anyway. At least that came late - close relative Promised Neverland didn't show that much restraint. Shadows House is generally well written though, with great characters, interesting interactions and a great hook. But what really makes it memorable is that it's exceptionally good at the cute/creepy contrast, something that is often tried but rarely works as well as here, with great character designs and very appropriate production. I hope this gets a sequel, because it seems like it's just getting started. 7/10

SSSS.Dynazenon

Coming in with a fondness for Gridman, Dynazenon didn't have to do much to convince me. The surprise though is that it's not a rehash even if it's basically the same show, a character drama where occasionally huge and goofy fights break out. Dynazenon is Gridman done better, and the interesting part is how it accomplishes this - mainly by being far more conventional. I do appreciate that Gridman went for something weird and almost experimental, but that only really paid off towards the end while most of the show was a distraction/holding pattern. It just didn't feel like there was enough material for a full series there, more like a movie maybe, if even that. Dynazenon fixes this by just being a TV show, with an actual cast of characters that each have their own arc. And by spreading the material this way, Dynazenon ends up having a lot more nuance than its intensely focused predecessor, while having the same themes and not actually being any deeper. In a way, Gridman ends up looking like the spinoff in retrospect, while Dynazenon is the full package. 8/10

Thunderbolt Fantasy S3

So how good was this season? So good that Thunderbolt Fantasy doesn't end up at the top, that's how. And all the elements that made Tbolt such a sure thing are still there, big hammy puppets doing stunts and scheming never gets old. However, I do have to note that at this point, the writing appears to have gotten too comfortable. I don't expect it to ever top the amazing S1 ending, but at this point it's like Tbolt has stopped trying to deliver on endings at all and seems in the process of retooling itself into a longrunner instead. Barely anything gets resolved in S3 (the climax is that the climax of S2 is resolved again, for good this time... maybe), and everything else is just setting up plotpoints for the next season. Tbolt is truly lucky that it doesn't actually need to resolve anything to be a great time, but at this point I have to say that I'd appreciate it if they wrapped it up with S4. 8/10

Nomad: Megalobox 2

Speaking of sequels to shows I liked, Nomad doesn't so much improve upon its predecessor but steamrolls right over it. This is a tall order, since Megalobox was surprisingly good for a sports shounen and had a real nice, heartwarming ending that Nomad instantly negates for purposes of drama and everyone being extremely miserable. That sounds like a pretty terrible idea - and it would be, if Nomad wasn't as excellent as it is. To call it not the same show would be an understatement, because it's a true sequel, not just the same characters doing their thing some more, or new characters doing the same thing as the old ones did. Indeed my biggest problem with Megalobox was that it still closely adhered to its genre template and was very predictable; Nomad fixes this issue thoroughly. Nomad is about questioning what being a hotblooded shounen protagonist eventually leads you to, and how to fix everything you screwed up by being one. You could call it a deconstruction, but that term has been so abused for cynical, edgy "thing you like actually sucks" takes that I feel like it doesn't really fit here. Nomad isn't cynical at all, it's just a character drama about some boxers past their prime, and it being a sequel to a show that is indeed rather formulaic just enhances the experience. My biggest issue with it was that I really like what they did with Joe in this story, so the big focus on Mac's backstory felt like a distraction for a long time. But in the end that turned out to be absolutely necessary to make the ending work. The ending's just great, by the way, and I shall say not more about it. 9/10

Odd Taxi

Yeah boy, here's the show that has apparently become somewhat of a "greatest show you didn't watch" meme, which I can feel smug about because I don't need YouTubers to tell me what's good and followed this from day one. Anyway, Odd Taxi is indeed great, the greatest show in a few years even. What starts out as seemingly a relaxed hangout show in the vein of Midnight Diners quickly turns into a psychological murder mystery while never losing its quirky humor. The character writing is outstanding, with even small bit players being on a level that the average anime wishes it could have for leads. And the rollout of the mystery is exemplary, with answers given and new questions raised every episode with a satisfying and logical payoff in the end. This is also the rare anime that has rock solid production from the first to the last second; it's never really flashy but excellently done and highly consistent nonetheless. And the music just owns. I have a few complaints, mainly that there's a few logical weaknesses in the story (which wouldn't even register in a lesser show, but sticks out here since the rest is so immaculately constructed) and that the ending overextends on the emotions when the rest of the show is so reserved and dry in comparison. But those are only the reasons why I didn't give it perfect marks, and I almost did that anyway. 9/10

[phoneybeatlemania-bit-the-dust]

I’d disagree with the anon that Paul was “incapable” of love, but I do agree he was very distanced, and pretty cruel (to women) when he was younger. (It was unfortunate they bought into the love at first sight myth, but he was also a charmer, and dropped affection and got colder after fucking them.)

But I just can’t see romantic interest on Paul’s end. I’m sure he loved John, but a lot of the “sexual/Romantic evidence” really can just be as construed as platonic love. I feel there may be some confirmation bias looking for “clues”. (Not an attack on anyone, but some of the analysises seem to try too hard, really).

He does make references, with the whole “calling him babe during concerts”, and “in bed” but that could just mean he’s not uncomfortable with coming off “gay”. He has a quote about it somewhere I think. He’s supportive of the community at any rate.

This is kind of my own bias, but at times I think he…plays it up a little during the present day? Again, I’m positive he did love John a lot, but with how he is, a charmer, good at manipulating his image, he knows there is a benefit to building up the “magical” Lennon McCartney dynamic. John’s dead, and the old conflicts have faded, so he has no reason not to. I don’t think he’s anti-social, or a psycho or anything, but he certainly does put a lot of thought into his image, especially now, with how he wants to leave his legacy.

I’m less knowledgeable about John, and the speculation about his mental illnesses, but on his end, I can certainly see it. Maybe he’s just blind, but the looks are very much…yeah. He does seem to rely Paul a lot, and hold him in very high regard (REGARDLESS of what those old male biographers might make of him). You just know he was suffering over Paul, poor bastard.

Not sure if anything happened. I think Paul knew though, and either ignored it, or was kind, knowing John wouldn’t act on it. OR he didn’t notice! With the whole “we shared beds A LOT. you would think he’d make a pass at me, darling~”

I guess that’s how I see it. I don’t really have strong feelings on the nature of their relationship, or want them to be “confirmed”, so I try to be as objective as possible! Not a shipper, but not a male biographer. In fact, I was very put off learning the ship was a thing at first! With every fan base “having to” ship the main male leads, that’s what I thought this was. But after three years, reading actual books, primary stuff, I’ve began to change my mind on its legitimacy, and this was my conclusion. But new information can always change!

(Sorry for the long long analysis, god! I just took my adderall and I should go eat! Feel free to block me for spam/harassment.)

Yeah, this is basically my big mclennon dilemma: did Paul love John?

Of course he loved him, but I mean did he harbour any homosexual feelings towards John - and I just go back and fourth on that a lot.

In my last response to an anon I wasn’t necessarily trying to argue that Paul was romantically/sexually attached to John, because all in all, I don’t believe he did - but it probably came off that way because I didn’t particularly like the way the anon had phrased some stuff (like calling him “a master manipulator” and “incapable of love”) and so I just sort of wanted to show that the relationship was more nuanced then just “john was simping for paul”. My overall point with that response was more so that whilst I think Paul struggles in showing real affection and emotions, I don’t think he was incapable of love prior to Linda. I think he did really love John (in whichever form of love you want to take it: romantically, platonically etc.)

And so my point I guess wasnt so much that Paul was always capable of love (because I think he did at least love his family, his close-friends, probably Jane etc.), but maybe more so that he was always capable of intimacy with another person, though he struggled with it.

But yeah, he was quite cruel to a lot of the girls he slept with in the 60s, but I wouldn’t say that suggests he was incapable of love (i know thats not what you’re saying but other people might interpret it through that lens) I would just say he was young, dumb, ridiculously rich and famous and not emotionally mature enough yet to really empathise with most of those girls. Not trying to completely excuse him, but like, i dunno, i always just try to view people from the most human perspective. Everyones an twat sometimes yknow

I also really struggle to see romance on Pauls behalf towards John - the only times I think “wait but maybe he did fancy john back” is when I read some of his lyrics (like in ‘Coming Up’, ‘Yvonne’s The One’, and to some extent ‘Here Today’ - though I think interpreting Here Today as strictly platonic love is still a valid interpretation). I mentioned this in a different post though, that analysing his lyrics just isnt particularly convincing for me, because it feels more like speculation - and also as someone who does write songs, I know that a lot of lyrics just arent as deep as we wish they were. It is really difficult to be truly introspective and honest in a song, without exaggerating or hyperbolising or fictionalising any autobiographical aspects.

I do see your point with Paul possibly playing up the “Lennon/McCartney m a g i c” - im not entirely sure how much I agree, but I do agree to some extent. I think he’s always been very image conscious, and being in what is probably the all-time most famous pop band definitely wouldve heightened that. Even as a teenager I think he’s always just had this natural charm about him, and that tends to stem I guess from a need to be liked; I think you can see it in every interview he’s ever done to be honest. Its not necessarily a bad thing, (because id take a charmer over a rude knobhead any day) but I guess it sort of just shows that Paul is flawed like everybody else. Also, just read @mothernatures-sons tags and I agree with her - Paul just knows when to be a nice person! Nothing wrong with that! It isnt manipulative like the last anon suggested, its just how most people are: polite :) Ive heard a lot of anecdotes from people who have worked with or met Paul and the majority of them say he was a just a nice guy. Not saying he was never an arsehole (cause yeah he was pretty cruel to those girls in the 60s) but I think overall, hes a pretty good guy 👍

On the other hand though, you could also say that superficial journalists are looking for superficial answers - and Paul knows what the people want to hear. But occasionally ill hear an interview that does seem more intimate then most - I havent listened to it in awhile, but the interview he did with Sean I remember felt more honest to me then most. And when he said he’d like to spend the day “in bed” with John, to me that felt like a genuine and fitting response. Because, whilst it has sexual connotations, it also just feels like he’s saying he’d just like to sit around, chat, dont chat, just whatever with John for a day. Like he would just like another moment of intimacy with him.

I think we are pretty much in agreement on most of this though! At first I was also like “nah, mclennon isnt real, teenage girls just love shipping guys!” (I am a teenaged girl and I can confirm this lol) but then it just sort of became apparent to me through reading more and more about their relationship that there probably was something more on Johns behalf. If John wasnt in love with Paul, then it feels as though a lot of things he said and did just dont add up (the big one for me is him marrying Yoko so soon after Paul married Linda - like I really cannot come up with a heterosexual explanation for that!)

But when it comes to Paul, though ill have moments of doubt, I dont think he was in love with John (homosexually) and I do think a lot of the evidence on Pauls behalf seems like a stretch (but like you, im not having a go at anyone, because I understand that it is easy to carried away, plus its fun - but realistically, most of Pauls evidence just is not convincing to me). He’s comfortable with his sexuality, and I really do try to respect that and not force a gay interpretation of quotes or songs from him, unless it is genuinely making me question his sexuality and mclennon.

PS dont worry, I didn’t take this is spam at all!! And also, I would never block someone just for disagreeing with me! I enjoy discussion and I think its good to engage with people who disagree with you! To be honest, id only block someone if they were purposely being a real arsehole <3

[retrogradedreaming]

For the ask game! Arcane !

Favorite character: Viktor!!! I know, everyone is sooo surprised but it's true!!

Least favorite character: Okay wow this is really hard actually because Arcane does SUCH a good job with all its characters. Probably Heimerdinger or Sevika. Both of them are down at the bottom for me. Oh, and pretty much every councilor who isn't Jayce or Mel.

5 favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

Jayvik

CaitVi

Sorry I only like these two ships!!! I COULD get on board with MelJayVik I think, given some time and thought, but it's not really a ship I root for. But yeah, I can't even come up with 5 ships I like sorry!!!

Character I find most attractive: Viktor!! What can I say, he's my Type.

Character I would marry: This is a hard one because I want to say Viktor because he IS my favorite, but I think we'd be too similar in some ways to work well. Maybe Mel or Vander? They both have the soft but strong vibe and that's what I need in my life.

Character I would be best friends with: Jayce or Viktor probably. Jayce because he's really personable and honestly, I like having the extrovert friend who can be my buffer in social situations and help me make friends. But I also like the Viktor is the type of friend you could be in a room with and interact or not. He seems like he'd be good for late night conversations or just chilling doing your own thing and not talking for hours, which is EXACTLY the kind of friendship I like best.

Putting the rest of this under a cut because it got so long and anyone who knows me knows I am not concise.

A random thought: I really love how Arcane animates expressions. I made a whole post about Viktor's not too long ago, but this goes for all of them. It's the little nuances in the eyes, eyebrows, mouths, just little things that you don't get in most shows. I swear, they're more expressive than real people.

An unpopular opinion: I'm not sure if this is unpopular, but I see a lot of people talking about Jayce slander, so. I think Jayce is one of the most realistic and human characters in the show. He's living this very human experience of trying his best and people look at him and be like "he's doing a bad job" and YES he is, but he's trying and you know that he's open to changing his perspective and doing better. He's basically in the space that I feel like a lot of people are where, socially, we know we need to do better, so we try it, and we mess up, and I think what a lot of people hate about Jayce is that he takes that risk and often messes up and people don’t have a lot of patience for that. This isn’t to minimize the horrible consequences of many of his actions, but it reminds me of this song where it was like “don’t we all have problems that would be exacerbated by living life in the public eye?” and I think that’s what happens to him here. The higher you go in society, the more dire the consequences of your fuck-ups.

My canon OTP: CaitVi!! If we don't get a kiss at minimum I will scream

My non-canon OTP: JayVik! They're canon in my heart

Most badass character: Vi and Vander for different reasons. I think it's really cool how they're both strong and they're both fighters but they're both motivated by the people they love. Vander to me is badass because he knows what kind of fighting different situations call for, and I think that's a skill that not everyone has. Vi I think takes things a step beyond where Vander was able to go, and she takes action more readily, and instead of stopping the fight because things go horribly wrong, she gets up and approaches it differently.

Most epic villain: I guess the obvious answer here is Silco but genuinely I think he’s an incredible villain, and I liked that we see some of his motivation for what got him to this point

Pairing I am not a fan of: I...really can’t think of one? I guess like Jayce and Mel isn’t one I actively support, so maybe that one? But there’s no pairing in the show I can think of that’s actually like “wow hate that.”

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Well if we’re talking trauma...all of them?? Otherwise, I don’t know. I feel so strongly that the writers did a great job with all of the characters - I felt like I could understand their motivations, their personalities, the characters are flawed in a way that makes them relatable...Maybe if I’d known who these characters were in League, it would’ve made a difference to how I saw them, but maybe not. Or maybe I’ll think more critically about them later, but right now, I just think every character is interesting and fun to explore and there’s nothing in the show that I see as the writers really screwing up.

Favorite friendship: Kind of Vi and Ekko? Honestly, I think Ekko is such a great and valuable friend to have PERIOD that I could say anyone and him. But I really liked how Vi and Ekko came back together, how Ekko is loyal but he’s also thoughtful and calculating and intelligent while being vulnerable with certain people. But I think Vi and Ekko specifically are similar in some ways, but the sort of sibling relationship between them is nice.

Character I most identify with: I had a long conversation with my friend about this recently and it’s Viktor. First of all, we have the same haircut. Second, there are a lot of things he does and ways he acts that I really relate to. Like how he does that lighthearted insult thing where it’s like “are you making fun of me” and he’s like “No, I actually wanted to talk to you.” And there’s the aspect of no one believed in me but I did it anyway - every significant thing I’ve ever done has been something I did after almost everyone I knew said I couldn’t or shouldn’t or it wouldn’t work. And I made it happen for myself because I believed I could and I wanted it THAT much. I look for unusual or innovative solutions, especially when there’s a problem I can’t just get out of, and I take a lot of unconventional approaches and put serious thought into what I do, even if in the end, I make an impulsive choice. I also have the same kind of personality where irl people look at me and think I’m this serious introvert but I thrive on humor and wit, and I think it surprises people. I could go on, but you get it.

Character I wish I could be: Well, it’s. Still Viktor. I wish I had more of his positive qualities, like his confidence in himself and his fearlessness in standing up to people and disagreeing openly with them and really believing in himself. Also, I wish I were half that smart. I feel like I’m just saying “I wish I were me but better” and like....it’s true. A little egotistical...

[aethersea]

you know what, I never do these things, but actually I’ve decided I would like to get to know people better! I would like to partake of the mortifying ordeal! I would like to talk about myself for a bit!

ok for the next...let’s say five days I will answer any of these things that people tag me in, or any random personal questions you plop in my ask box. I don’t have an ask meme on hand but just....pick one you’ve seen recently, or make up questions of your own, and I’ll answer. (the answer might be ‘nope that’s private’ but I will answer.) (@ the anon who asked for book recs - I see you, I’ve been thinking of books all day, I’m going to give you SUCH a long answer, I hope you don’t regret your choices bc it WILL be full of gushing)

alright, let’s go!

🌻 Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @booksandchainmail​

Last Song: I’m currently listening to “Falcon in the Dive” from the Scarlet Pimpernel musical on loop. I watched one or two Scarlet Pimpernel movies when I was just barely too young to fully get what was going on, and the story’s held an odd but deep-seated place in my heart ever since. A few years ago I found out there’s a musical and most of the songs are pretty stellar (go listen to “Madame Guillotine” if you like big ensemble broadway numbers, it’s a banger, the bit where he cries out for God has been running through my mind on and off for a few days now haha not like that’s topical or anything), so every once in a while I spend a few days listening to them a lot.

Sometime last year I read the actual book, and got super into the whole concept of the Scarlet Pimpernel for a while. I plotted out Pimpernel aus for several fandoms, I read the entire wikipedia article, and I went looking for bootlegs of the musical. I didn’t find one, but I did find a full radioplay-style recording of the script, complete with full musical numbers, and listened to it like a podcast.

Reader, I was so disappointed. The play adds some scenes, bc a lot of the dramatic tension of the novel comes from internal conflict and that doesn’t stage super well, and the very first scene of this play – a play written in the NINETIES – features our dashing hero rescuing some aristocrats from a French prison, and then saying to the person in the next cell, who begs for rescue but is not an aristocrat, “We have enough of your kind in England.”

Enough! of your KIND! What in the merry frickety HECK my dudes!! The book has some rather unfortunate™ takes but it is from 1905, it’s regrettable but sadly to be expected. This play is from 1997. It has NO excuse. This scene wasn’t even in the book! What! the heck!

I was so disheartened that I lost my excitement for the play, and a couple songs later I stopped listening. It occurred to me just a few days ago that you could actually stage that ironically, with the person in the cell giving the audience a “can you believe this” look, and then the rest of the play could feature assorted non-aristocratic ensemble members constantly looking at the audience like they’re on The Office. And hey, maybe that’s what they did, or something similar – maybe that was never meant to be taken as a cleanly heroic stance, and the play deals with it in a complex way. It’s possible. I wouldn’t know. Kinda doubt it though, based on song lyrics.

Favorite Color: red, probably

Last Movie: I watched that new lesbian christmas movie with my family for christmas, the one with kirsten stewart and the guy from schitt’s creek. it’s very sweet and good and kinda sad, and I really enjoyed it. it also incidentally has the best gay best friend trope in probably anything ever, bc it’s not a trope (I didn’t realize until several hours after watching that it technically fits), it’s just a guy who is the protagonist’s best friend, and they’re just all gay, and then when he Gives Relationship Advice as a gay best friend always does, it’s advice about how to deal with your partner’s hangups around coming out.

actually every part of the gay best friend trope becomes better when they’re just best friends who are both gay. the big dramatic gestures (in this case, driving some ungodly distance in the snow on no notice) go from “haha how kooky” to “queer man will do anything he needs to to rescue his queer friend from an isolating & potentially triggering situation”. the relationship advice isn’t “honey you deserve some self-respect, treat yourself”, it’s a deeply sincere reminder of the vulnerability that is shared across almost everyone’s queer experience, and look I could ramble about this for a long time before reaching a coherent point but I’m INTO IT, okay? I’m into it.

Last Show: you want me to remember what show I last finished???? impossible, cannot be done, it was a long time ago and the adhd has eaten everything that happened before last week. here, instead I’ll tell you about another movie I watched, late at night with my mom in cozy companionship just a couple days ago. it’s called Quigley Down Under and it’s about a cowboy who goes to Australia and kills a bunch of racists, 10/10 would watch again. it’s from 1990 but it feels much older, with the music choices and the cinematography of a 70s Western. the cowboy is great, honorable and fearless and kind, but the breakaway star of this movie for me is the woman who attaches herself to his side and refuses to leave. her name is Cora, and she’s crazy, in the sense that she’s not altogether tethered to reality, but this never for a second diminishes her agency. she’s fierce and clever and compassionate, and she basically never does anything she doesn’t want to in the whole movie. her arc is about overcoming trauma by taking charge of her own fear and facing it head-on, she is never belittled or dismissed by the narrative or the protagonist, and look she’s just so cool. I love her. she’s so vibrantly alive. her story could probably have been handled with a bit more nuance, but honestly for the 90s it’s pretty great. I’m no expert, but I found nothing objectionable in it, just a bit of heavy-handedness.

anyway the theme of the movie is that racism is evil and racists deserve to be shot, and this too could have been handled better (not a single aboriginal character speaks a single line of english in this movie), but it follows through on that message in every way, while still being a fun kinda campy cowboy movie. overall a very good time.

Currently Watching: started showing my sister Hilda the other day, and she’s liking it! I love that show, it’s so incredibly cute. can’t wait to see season 2

Currently Reading: lmao I wish. lately the brain has firmly rejected all attempts to read anything of any length. currently pending, bc I was halfway through them when my brain stalled out, are tano’s fic What Does Kill You Can Make You Stronger, Too, a Toby Daye book - I think it was The Brightest Fell, I got like half a chapter in and haven’t picked it up in over a month, the Locked Tomb series, and probably a few other things too. ooh! also a book called Making Sex by thomas laqueur, which is my fancy academic reading that I’ve been doing in short bursts for the past year or two when I feel fancy and academic. it’s about the development of the concept of biological sex and of gender in Western society, and it’s fascinating. has among other things introduced me to the idea that until quite recently, fathers were a matter of faith. the mother? yeah, you can watch the baby pop out, we all know who the mother is. but the father? how can you know? how can you really know? we have paternity tests these days, but for all of human history up until now, we've just had to take fatherhood on faith. (not to mention we didn’t even know what fathers were contributing to the production of a fetus. clearly it was something, since you can’t get pregnant without a penis getting involved, but we have literally not known what until the past few decades. and that is wild. it has colored ALL of human history, all of our conceptions of society and family and kinship and gender, all of it, and it hadn’t even occurred to me until it was spelled out for me in this book, and it’s just......wow.

Salty, sweet or savory: for christmas my sister and I made seven different types of cookie, most of them involving chocolate somehow.

Craving: no bc I ate so many cookies. unless sleep counts. or maybe pringles, it’s been many moons since last I had a potato chip and I miss them.

Coffee or Tea: no thank you

Tagging: @coloursisee, @krchy-tuna, @sam-j-squirrel, @xzienne, @mirandatam, @viciousmaukeries, @sepulchritude, @elidyce, and @navigatorsnorth bc it’s been a while since we’ve talked, and I’m super hyped that you’re married now. v happy for you!

[paragonrobits]

why dimitrescu when rose is also big: an observation on the nature of the Big Sexylady perspective and why rose was never a tumblr sexyman

so im thinking about how Lady Dimitrescu is the first female character to really fit the ‘tumblr sexyman’ vibe, in terms of how people have reacted to her, and I thought: Why didn’t rose quartz ever get this treatment?

like, she’s canonically not that much shorter than Dimistrescu is. She’s enormous, she’s thick, she’s curvy. She’s too wide to fit through a door! She’s a massive super soldier, designed for power and smashing in a va-voom package! so how come people never fixated on her like that?

sure, you might SAY that it was SU’s art style, as opposed to the more realistic designs but... have you SEEN the art styles people like to use around here? Or in any big name series that isn’t live action? The realism of the series is not a concern.

Like, JAsper was REAL popular as a sexygirl icon for a while, for precisely the same reasons I pointed out that Rose ought to have been; she’s big. but Jasper was controversial, for reasons I’ll get into in a bit.

So I think the actual reason, besides the age-old point that people respond differently to characters, comes down to a few details:

1. There is a certain charisma and purity towards villains who are bad and own it, the ones likely to have a card signifying how super evil they are; they laugh and sing songs about how super evil they are. they don’t pretend to be sympathetic, they don’t try to win the audience over with a sad backstory, they’re just unapologetically Bad. and this kind of attitude is a common in the tumblr icon! They’re not without nuance (Sans is an essay all on his own, and Junkrat is what he is because he grew up in an irradiated wasteland and had to be sharp and ruthless to survive), but they’re uncomplicated and fun in their simplicity.

Rose is anything but simple. She’s massively controversial, and that tends to push people off.

2. Rose Quartz, character wise, is not in the best position for this sort of thing. She started out as a distant figure that everyone loved, but no one said much about; we knew NOTHING about her personally. we knew that she fought for Earth, that she loved Greg and Pearl. we knew things she did, things she cared about,  but we didn’t actually know about her personality. Now, if she HAD been, with her goofy and melancholy persona with an edge of perpetual regret mixed with love for the world, she might have been. but again, she was a deeply complicated character, and layered characterization can be difficult to really get into for the sort of things that draw the tumblr sexyman vibe.

Jasper, as implied earlier, works on the same principle. Is she sexy to a bunch of people? Yeah. but while she WAS hugely popular for a while, there were still too many controversial elements for her to pick up in the same way. A tumblr sexyman can be complex and controversial, but there must be a certain purity to them; they can be evil, but not in a way that might make people uncomfortable.

3. It actually took us a while to find out that she was both a literal giant (not including her original Pink Diamond form), and massively thick. And from a certaion perspective, stacked as hell (as much as can be noted in that show’s art style, but certainly by the standards of Gems). But it wasn’t immediately clear how big she actually was, and since visuals are the first thing most people tend to drift towards... well, by the time Jasper had been introduced, people latched onto her build and when it was clear that Rose had pretty much the same body, it was largely overlooked.

Essentially, due to the slow burn nature of SU’s storytelling, the gradual build up of Rose’s character and actual appearance, it wasn’t obvious what she was about for a while and by now, only people who are already into her are ready to hop aboard the ‘Rose could probably bust Dimistrescu’s outfit because she’s fucking huge’ train

[meggtheegg]

evan hansen, sam wilson, & wanda maximov?

ohh man this one's gonna get long so i'll put it under a read more :D

evan:

favorite thing about them

his sincere desire to make sure everyone is okay. half of his problems stem from that one need, but it's ultimately what makes him set things right, too.

least favorite thing about them

there are many obvious character flaws that i could point out, but the most overlooked one is that he goes off his fucking meds without telling anyone that shit is dangerous and should not be treated as anything but that.

favorite line

"dear evan hansen, today is going to be a good day and here's why. because today, no matter what else, today at least you're you. no hiding. no lying. just... you. and that's. that's enough. maybe someday, everything that happened will all feel like a distant memory. maybe someday no one will remember about the connor project. or me. maybe someday, some other kid is going to be standing here, staring out at the trees, feeling so...alone, wondering if maybe the world might look different from all the way up there. better. and maybe he'll start climbing, one branch at a time, and he'll keep going. even when it seems like he can't find another foothold. even when it feels... hopeless. like everything is telling him to let go. this time...maybe this time, he won't let go. he'll just hold on...and keep going. he'll keep going until he sees the sun."

brOTP

evan and zoe should be friends, and even if that's super unrealistic, i will still hold onto that

OTP

evan x going back on his gosh darn meds

nOTP

i've never really seen an evan ship that bothers me, actually

random headcanon

i've said it a million times and i will say it again, this kid has autism, and no one will ever convince me otherwise (side-eyes steven levenson and ben platt)

unpopular opinion

evan is neither a horrible kid or a smol uwu anxious bean. he's a mentally ill teenager, who should be treated with the nuance and understanding that deserves.

also, the kiss at the end of ywbf kills all the emotion and power of the song so quickly, why has it not been taken out yet

song i associate with them

kill the ghost - motherfolk

favorite picture of them

(i am so sorry, i had to share this picture with the world it makes me laugh every time)

sam:

favorite thing about them

what is there not to love about sam wilson, honestly? if i have to pick something, it's probably his adaptability. captain america trolling him on his morning run? okay, let's talk to him about his trauma. he and black widow show up at his door saying everyone's trying to kill them? let them in and make them breakfast, if they eat that kind of thing. being hunted by some masked assassin? time to bring a knife to a gunfight and win, i guess. the masked assassin is cap's best friend? well, time to drop everything and search the world for him and become an avenger. superheroes have to register with the government, now? well, guess it's time to become a fugitive and go on the run for a few years. cap is an old man, half the world has gone on without him for five years, and now he's supposed to be captain america? well, he'll hesitate to take up the mantle, but good for steve. the masked assassin that tried to kill him is part of his found family now? sure, whatever. invite him to the cookout. i think that literally nothing could surprise this man, by now, and he just keeps doing what he feels is right without even stopping to question it.

least favorite thing about them

honestly, i don't even know. some of the stuff he says to bucky feels uncharacteristically unsympathetic, in civil war and the beginning of tfatws, but also like,,,usually he's not wrong, he's just kind of blunt about it??? idk man i love sam wilson.

oh, and i guess the cowl on his cap suit looks kinda dumb and uncomfortable

favorite line

"the only power i have is that i believe we can do better."

that's sam summed up in one line, right there. he's a normal guy surrounded by superheroes and yet he holds his own and stands out because he's so sincere and dedicated and good that it doesn't even matter

brOTP

sam and steve. we should've gotten more of them hanging out, honestly. they were great together.

OTP

sambucky, baybee! for all the reasons i listed in my answer for bucky :)

nOTP

another one i can't think of anything for. i guess sam/tony, if anyone ships that???

random headcanon

sam was actually pretty quiet, as a kid. he kind of let sarah do the talking for him. it wasn't until they got older that he started becoming more talkative and developing his sense of humor

unpopular opinion

sam did make mistakes in tfatws. bucky wasn't the only one to screw up. that was what made their reconciliation so nice. yeah, bucky was being way more of an asshole about the shield than sam was about anything, but that doesn't mean he was perfect 100% of the time, and that's good. that's what makes him human and relatable.

song i associate with them

come on, there's no way i can't say trouble man, here.

favorite picture of them

wanda

favorite thing about them

her gentle kindness. especially in civil war, there's something so soft and genuine about her that's just immediately endearing.

least favorite thing about them

the way that closing scene in wandavision implied she still may become a villain, despite having that option and rejecting it at the cost of her family, earlier that same episode. it just felt...wrong.

favorite line

"i can't control their fear. only my own."

i probably quote this line way too often. it's just....chef's kiss

(honorable mention goes to: "I don't even know who you are." "You will.")

brOTP

i so wish agatha hadn't become a one-dimensional villain in the last episode, because their friendship, however fake, was really sweet.

but also her friendship with the rest of team cap, especially steve, was also really lovely and i wish we could've gotten more of that

OTP

🎶WANDAVISION, WA-WANDAVISION, WANDAVISION WA-WANDAVISION...WANDAVISION!!"🎶

nOTP

wanda/pietro....just...ew....

random headcanon

despite her love for the genre, the two sitcoms she could never watch were alf and gilligan's island. the themes of being trapped somewhere without your family, no matter how funny the circumstances, just hit too close to home.

unpopular opinion

they shouldn't have aged wanda up to match lizzie's actual age. i know it was never officially stated anywhere until wandavision, but in aou and civil war, she was heavily implied to be a teenager, and honestly, that would've made everything about her character both hit harder and make way more sense. she could have been in her late teens-early 20s by the time wandavision rolled around, but having her in her late 20s-early 30s just doesn't fit all the comments about her being a kid/going to high school/etc. making her younger would mean that her decision to join hydra was the misinformed decision of a traumatized teenager, rather than a grown woman, and could have tied into tfatws and karli, which could then expand into an actual examination of why young people are willing to go to such extremes to make change and that could have been really interesting.

song i associate with them

razzmatazz - i don't know how but they found me

favorite picture of them