#and yeah cant ever search for stuff on my blog myself :(

[sukugo]

i don’t know if you’ve ever discussed twink anakin and granddaddy ben fucking as force ghosts because i can’t search your blog anymore (🥺) but your drawing of them is one of my favorite things i’ve ever seen it’s literally my lockscreen. to think that obikin eternally look like that… HOT

OH MY GOD THAT'S !!!!!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 literally SO happy to hear that u like the drawing that much 💖💕💞💖💓 it's a huge honor to have ur drawing as a lockscreen. thank u 🥰🥰💖💖

i think ive only ever mentioned force ghost fucking in a few posts, but never really gone into detail 🤔 but ughhhhh yeah it IS so hotttttttttttt, I NEED THEM TO FUCK!!!!!!! i need that twink RAILED by that old man!!!! it's what they both deserve

[lasercruz]

@quarterdollar​ fuck you and im sorry that i took so long to answer and i hope that im mostly coherent because i am. very tired as im typing this

1: Full name Nicky Jackie Marie Cruz !!

2: Age 21

3: 3 Fears Mold, tall heights if I’m not secured (like, I’m not scared of rollercoaster heights but I’m scared of like, cliffs), and balloons esp balloon animals

4: 3 things I love I love so many things uhh hh h. Jjba, adventure zone, and my friendssss 💞

I know turn ons/offs aren’t inherently sexual but i never know what to say for them so im skipping them :0

7: My best friend you 🥺🥺

8: Sexual orientation bi

9: My best first date ive never really been on a actual date :0

10: How tall am I 5′3

11: What do I miss being with my friends physically and just watching stuff or goofing around on the floor 😭

12: What time were I born 11:02pm

13: Favourite color Dark blues

14: Do I have a crush yes shh

15: Favourite quote there so much sappy quotes that are on uquizzes a lot that i like a lot the first that comes to mind is “ You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you.” and so on and also “if i loved you less i might be able to talk about it more”

16: Favourite place As far as just physically and not like people or other stuff that comes with with a place, I miss VT campus a lot tbh more than I thought I would. To pick a more specific place, the gazebo at the duck pond cause its where I’d go if I wanted to be alone or like if my roommate was sleeping or working and i didnt want to worry about being quite and it was always super peaceful

17: Favourite food I dont really have One favorite food it just depends what I’m in the mood for but my go to answer for favorite food category wise is either chinese or seafood

18: Do I use sarcasm Depends who I’m with ?? Generally no not often but if im close with someone and just goofin yeah

19: What am I listening to right now My love song playlist. its my go to thing to listen to cause my playlist with all my music has so much on it that i end up skipping half the songs until i find something im in the mood for and this one has a lot less that i end up skipping. the current song its on is day without you by keep for cheap

20: First thing I notice in new person It depends on the person like if they have something that stands out about them, thats what I tend to notice but like. How they carry themself i guess ? cause i feel like thats a easy way to get a read on somebody before talking to them

21: Shoe size 5 mens / 7 womans

22: Eye color Brown

23: Hair color Naturally dark brown but currently dyed black with rainbow bangs

24: Favourite style of clothing this question is on so many ask games and quizzes and I never know how to answer it cause i feel like i dont really have one specific style,, I like colorful and fun stuff i guess ?

25: Ever done a prank call?  No and if you prank call a place of business youre annoying. i used to answer phones at work and we didn’t get them super often but GOD i hate prank callers

27: Meaning behind my URL emu is an old nickname and what i mainly went by until i settled on Nicky and this. is my blog.

28: Favourite movie Baby driver !!

29: Favourite song my go to answer for this is community gardens by the scary jokes

30: Favourite band THE SCARY JOKES

31: How I feel right now sleeby,,,,

32: Someone I love i love , my friendz ,, 🥺🥰

33: My current relationship status single ✌️

34: My relationship with my parents im close to my mom but i dont really get along with my dad ,

35: Favourite holiday Christmas !

36: Tattoos and piercing i have no tattoos, 3 piercings in each ear (2 on each earlobe and 1 on the top on each side)

37: Tattoos and piercing i want I want a interrobang on my wrist and an Aquarius symbol on my ankle and MAYBE the joestar birthmark, i wouldn’t mind more ear piercings and i want a septum piercing but ive seen videos of them getting done and they make me squirm i dont know if id go through with it

38: The reason I joined Tumblr sdklgkjgh i had a my little pony roleplay blog before i made my personal account

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? no we’re good friends !!

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? no not regularly at least

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? no

42: When did I last hold hands? my mom tried to hold my hand when i was half asleep on the couch the other day but like i was so out of it so like it was more our fingers together and the rest of my hand just loosely dangling so if that doesnt count, you

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? i give myself about 2 hours if im doing full makeup but thats purposefully longer than i need so i dont have to worry about rushing and i can relax and take my time

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? no i only shave them if they’re gonna be showing or if the Urge to be Smooth comes over me

45: Where am I right now? my room at home on my bed

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? probably Kaylie cause she doesn’t drink and i assume if im drunk with other friends there she’d be the only sober one

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? Reasonable, if i have it too loud i cant think so the only time i  have my music loud is if im doing nothing and want to Not Think

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? Ye

49: Am I excited for anything? short term im excited for the ai crushes all banks stream tonight and long term im excited to move into our apartment 

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? no im not a tell everything to someone type of person .

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? i smile most of the time like, at work (before we wore masks) id always be smiling to look nice and like. just in general if i want to Not Look Unhappy or whatever

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? my mom probably like, yesterday

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? ive never kissed any1     .

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?  nope i don’t think i really trust easily so like this doesnt rlly happen,

55: What is something I disliked about today? i woke up late cause i was up late last night so ive been tired all day I dont like the feeling

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? language barriers aside itd be super cool to meet hirohiko araki

57: What do I think about most? Whatever media im currently most into so right now adventure zone and magnus archives

58: What’s my strangest talent? umm i dunno im kinda flexable i guess ? not like ~contortionist~ level but like enough that i can freak people out sometimes

59: Do I have any strange phobias? i mentioned balloons as a fear in an eariler question so yeah that but im a lot better about it than i used to be

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? in front tbh

61: What was the last lie I told? i was on phones for the last hour and a half of my shift on friday and like. when people call and ask if an item is in stock and i can’t confirm it i, just tell them its not. like, someone asked if we had a specific kayak and i usually just search the walmart app or run over to where itd be to check but the kayaks are to far for me to run to and the app said limited stock which usually means little to none so , i just put it on hold for a bit then tell him we’re out.

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? i like video chatting in theory cause its nice to see people visibly react to stuff but i tend to get too self conscious about how i look so i  just do audio only

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes to both !! i am both

64: Do I believe in magic? yes in some ways i suppose

65: Do I believe in luck? yes im v superstitious

66: What’s the weather like right now? its a pretty good day its sunny but not too hot :oo

67: What was the last book I’ve read? its been ages since i last read a book in full 😔  i honestly dont knwo what the last one would of been 😔 😔

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? yes !!! love it

69: Do I have any nicknames? not anything i get consistently called no

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? ive never gotten super hurt that i can think of ??

71: Do I spend money or save it? save it

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge? no

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me? doppio bean plush ,,,,

74: Favourite animal? hedgehogs!!!!

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? on my phone probably on tiktok or something waiting for jojo to come on toonami

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? I? dont think he has one i guess ??

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? butterflies by samsa but it makes me happy in the “im crying now” kinda way itss cute

78: How can you win my heart? just by being nice and respectful tbh ,

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? idk i dont really want anything fancy just my name (chosen name please god im so scared of dying and geting my birth name on my tombstone if that happens i WILL come back as a vengeful ghost) and my birth and death dates

80: What is my favorite word? saccharine

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr by my tumblr crushes (which its been YEARS since i looked at) ; frostios, 27names4tears, smollpurrito, happynaru, and warpedlamp

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? if we being real id just get so scared dsjkfsldjglg  theres so much i could say i dont know :((

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? not ? that i know of 

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? why are all the questions worded super basic except this one skdlskdjfj. Shape shifting

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? i can really think of anything really as long as a friend is asking i tend to answer truthfully ?

86: What is my current desktop picture? Sobble BUT this reminded me that i wanted to change it to a xenoblade pic so its this now :

90: Failed a class? no

91: Kissed a boy? no

92: Kissed a girl? no

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no but oh god just thinking about that im 🥺🥺🥺🥺 id die id melt 🥺🥺

94: Had job? ye i was a cashier for a year in highschool and then i work in wamlart apparel in the summers

95: Left the house without my wallet? not when I know ill need it no, but ive left it home if im just going to a friend or family member’s house or i have my mom’s card or some cash in my pocket

96: Bullied someone on the internet? no !!

98: Played on a sports team? no lmao i dont do sports

99: Smoked weed? no

100: Did drugs? i had a weed brownie like once but it was such a small piece i didnt really feel anything

101: Smoked cigarettes? no

102: Drank alcohol? Ye

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? not currently i was vegan for a little bit to encourage a friend that was doing it though

104: Been overweight? no

105: Been underweight? no

106: Been to a wedding?  yes three, my grandma’s when she got remarried, and both my brothers

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? probably yes lmao often

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? not TV TV but if netflix and the like count then yes

109: Been outside my home country? no :(

110: Gotten my heart broken? not ? really no

111: Been to a professional sports game? ive been to a handful of Yankee games

112: Broken a bone? no

114: Been to prom? yes i went to my highschool’s and a friend’s highschool’s my senior year

115: Been in airplane? no

116: Fly by helicopter? no

117: What concerts have I been to? none :((((

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? ye

119: Learned another language? i took 3 years of Spanish in high school but i wasn’t any good at it and dont really remember much of what i did learn

120: Wore make up? yes i do often :0

123: Dyed my hair? ye a lot

124: Voted in a presidential election? yes ever since iv been old enough to i vote

125: Rode in an ambulance? no

126: Had a surgery?  dental surgery yes

127: Met someone famous? Not anyone i’d count no

128: Stalked someone on a social network? depends on what you count as stalking i guess but like not ever in a creepy way like ive been on people’s social media to find out stuff about them like. if theyre in a relationship or especially after highschool ill wonder about someone i havent talked to in awhile and ill see what theyve been up to and what theyre doing with their life and stuff

129: Peed outside? no

130: Been fishing? yes like once

131: Helped with charity? donation wise yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? ive never confessed to anyone and been rejected but once a friend told my crush i liked them and they confronted me about it and rejected me but it made me more mad at the friend that told them than it made me sad about being rejected because i knew it’d probably go like that  and it justmade thing awkward between us for awhile  😔

133: Broken a mirror? ive broken the little mirrors inside eyeshadow pallets but i havent broken full ones

134: What do I want for birthday? usually just money lol or something thoughtful and cute

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? i aggresivly do NOT want kids BUT hypohetically Elliot or Xander for a boy and idk what i’d nam a girl

136: Was I named after anyone? no

137: Do I like my handwriting?  its messy so no not really but if im writing something for myself like a not or whatever i dont mind as long as i can read it

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? even as a little kid i always played computer games but other than that, this guy :

139: Favourite Tv Show? Jojo

140: Where do I want to live when older? New york or japan

141: Play any musical instrument? i can kind of play harmonica

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? i burnt my thumb kinda bad on the oven a while ago its still kinda healing but right now it looks like its gonna stay a scar

143: Favourite pizza toping? i like everything/suprieme pizza but if i have to pick one single topping pepperoni

144: Am I afraid of the dark? yes :((

145: Am I afraid of heights? mentioned it earlier but yes if im not strapped in or secured etc

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? no im so scared of being caught doing something bad that i just. dont

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? i mean yes but thats life babey

149: What my greatest achievments are ive gotten awards for grades and stuff but that boring BUT i got the english department award or whatever that was called im very proud of that

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery i donate some and save the rest tbh

152: What do I like about myself i can be pretty  sometimes 👉👈 im cute or whateva ,,,

153: My closest Tumblr friend i dont really havent “tumblr friends” aside from friends i know irl and also tey have tumblrs ,,

154: Something I fantasise about just. growing up and having my own place maybe with someone and. being comfortable and  okay and not having to worry ,,

155: Any question you’d like? dkfjhdskhf japan :000

[aprilwritesabook]

I appolgize in advance for this long ass post haha.

Alright, so here's the deal. This post is gonna be part rant, part confessional, and part inspirational speech. So if your following this blog purely for the updates on my books you can skip it haha.

I know a currently published author. I used to kinda be friends with them in highschool, but it was more like a friend of a friend type deal. But I digress. Point is. They recently released there second book on Amazon. And I really wanna be happy and proud of them, and to see it as an inspirational thing, buuuuut I'm almost 100 sure they are actually a fraud?

And that's not me being bitter. I really really really wish this wasn't the case. But I have the evidence to back this theory up.

1- they claimed that there first book sold out multiple times. And to be fair this one might be at least partially true. Its rated pretty high on amazon, But then again they only have 4 people rate it and three of those people are the editor formattor and artist for the book. Soooo. Yeah I sure hope they rated it well.

2- they are constantly posting stories to there social media that are far fetched at best. They work in a bookstore. And almost every other week its a slightly diffrent story about a customer who "didn't even know" he was the author who would "burst into tears" the second he told them what the book was about because they were just Soooo touched by the message that they wept to a total stranger??? If that had happened even once it would have been an odd occurance. And this is something that apparently happens alllll the time to them. (I hate to drudge up old memes like this, but)

3- this person has recently made a tick tock and a youtube channel. And like, the content isssss questionable? And that's not necessarily a crime or anything. But they give updates about it on social media as if they are speaking to a mass of adoring fans and like...you can see how many subs and views a person has. We know he dosn't have a big fan base. And I know that sounds harsh. But like, some more gullible people have asked him for advise on how to be "successful" and "gain a following", and he answers them with authority. Like he has the answers even though he clearly dosn't? And that feels really... disingenuous at best?

4- along the same vein as 3. They recently made a post on twitter about how they are "overwhelmed by the amount of love and support they have found on the site" and how they get "some many heartfelt messages." Annnd again. I clicked the account. They literally have 5 followers. And not a SINGLE person has EVER liked, retweeted, or commented on a SINGLE tweet of theirs. Not one. Soooo like not only are you pretending to have a huge fan base that dosn't exist your also making up there engagement with you? Which this alone I feel brings validate to my doubts about the other things. Clearly they arn't above blatant lying and extreme over exaggeration. And also they either don't realize we can all seeeee these facts. Or they don't think anyone will actually check and call them on it ?????

Now there's a lot of other examples I could give. But my point isn't to put this ONE person on blast. I'm not trying to start beef or cause damage to their reputation or anything. Which is why I won't say their name or what there books are. The only way you'd know who I'm talking is if you also knew them in real life. In which case you either already know all this, or you should, so you don't fall victim to their lies.

The reason I'm saying any of this at all is because I think I know why they are doing it. And why so many indie authors or would be media mogels feel the need to do this.

The issue with trying to "build an audience" and "self market" yourself, is that you really only have 2 ways of guaranteed sucess.

You either need to have a pre established audience based on success you've already had in the past. (IE youtubers and movie stars writing successful books cause there fans will buy anything of there's reguardless.)

Or you need to buy your way in. Be it by quitting your day job to make social media your full time job, buying ads, hiring a social media person,or hiring a team of people with their own audiences (audio book narrators, cover artists, managers, ect)

And if you don't ALREADY have an audience, and you don't have the funds to BUY your way in, then your just gonna have to get real lucky.

You can be lucky for knowing somebody with an "in". They work in publishing, or advertising, or they're your rich uncle. Just someone who you can go to to get that boost one way or another to get one of the first two methods going for you.

You can get lucky by commenting the right thing on the right post and gaining followers that way. Or by being in the right place at the right time to meet somebody important.

You can be lucky by having lots of supportive friends and family who will promote you and your work FOR you.

Or lastly (and this is in the realm of being a one in a million case here. So it basically never happens without one of the other things I mentioned also being true.)

You can be lucky by working REALLY hard, and being REALLY talented, and having the world actually NOTICE YOU somehow? Just one person with influence who can find you in your dark hole of insignificance and shine a light on you so now the world can actually seee you.

And that sucks.

You could write the greatest book in the whole world. Truly a masterpiece. But if nobody buys it or reads it because they don't know who you are??? Then it dosen't matter does it?

It sucks Soooo hard.

Because untill you get those people with influence to shine a light on you, theres nothing you can do. And the market is soooooo drenched in new indie authors that the odds of the right people finding and liking your book are slim to none.

Its super unfair.

The people who have the influence arn't gonna buy a book with 0 reviews and no social media following.

Why? Because THEIR brand depends on only recommending the good shit. And they need to find that good shit NOW. If they read every book written by nobody's online, they'd have to wade through ALOT of garbage. wasting all their valuable time and money till they found something worthy. And honestly, from a business stand point, you cant really fault them for that

This is where the lies come from.

So basically no matter how you look at it, or what your strategy is, In order to get fans, you need to ALREADY HAVE THEM.

When your just starting out. And I mean truly at square one. It really feels like the only way to "make it" is to "fake it"

If you PRETEND to have a big following. And you PRETEND your books are selling really well already. And you PRETEND that people care deeply about you and your work... Then there is a chance that nobody will do the homework to find out its all a lie.

And if they think your successful already, then it sends a message to the consumers brains of "well they must be good. Everybody loves it/them".

It sucks that so many people who have found real success did so with lies, cash, and being already well connected.

And then they buy it, and they follow you, and the confirmation bias sets in, and eventually you'll dupe enough people into liking you that you don't HAVE to lie anymore.

Those of us with no cash and too high a conscious to lie our way to the top are left with virtually no chance of succeeding no matter how hard we work or how good our content is.

And I'm not claiming to be "better than" or "more worthy" than anyone else. I wanna make it clear that of your in the portion of having it fake it so you can follow your dreams then more power to you. Its a valid strategy. I hate that it works and I hate that its the only option sometimes. But I don't hate the people as creators for "doing what it takes." I get it. Really I do.

And it suckks major ass that so many people feel like this is the only way.

My whole point here. Is that we have slowly built a system where this is our reality. And honestly? End of the day? There's not a damn thing we can do to change it at this point.

In a perfect world made of unicorns and puppies. I could say "hey lets all go ready books by completely unknown authors. Be the change you wanna see in the world." But at the end of the day, especially in the unfiltered world of self publishing, It would be a complete shot in the dark to spend your resources on something completely unknown. We rely on word of mouth, and "best sellers" and high following to do the work of filtering out the bad stuff for us and it would be unrealistic if not impossible to go back on it now. Even if we wanted to there algorithms and shit built into the code. You'll never find the books that Amazon dosnt want you to find unless you search for it directly.

Now comes the confession/inspirational bit

I know all of the above to be true...But I'm choosing not to care

I'm not gonna lie my way to the top. I'm not gonna hide my struggles out of fear of seeming inferior. So here goes

I struggle a lot with depression and anxiety. I've been working on it, and I've gotten so much better in recent years. But there are always gonna be times when I slip up and my mental illnesses take over

When I was writing my first book I felt really empowered and good about myself for finally getting past all my own barriers and following my dreams.

And then once I was done writting and editing and I was ready to show the world and get feedback. I flopped.

I couldn't find anyone willing to beta read. Those who said they would do it (even people who claimed they "couldn't wait") ghosted me after I actually sent it to them

I was hoping to get 20 people. I really wanted it to be the best it could be. Only 11 actully signed up. Of that 11, 5 people actually read it: My spouse, my brother, my best friend, and 2 others. Those two others read the first bit I sent them, took a few weeks to get back to me, said they loved it, but then Neeeeeeeeever got back to me when I sent them the next chunk.

Now you can look at all that and come to the conclusion that it sucks. I know I sure did.

The struggles at each step made me doubt myself more and more to the point that I almost gave up writing all together.

And I didn't want to take about it or how it was making me feel, even though it was having a serious impact on me. I wanted to bottle it all up and let it consume me. Allllll because I didn't want people online to write me off as a failure before even giving me the chance.

I wasn't lying about being successful. I was just trying to hide the fact that I wasn't.

And that's almost as bad. Because then all the new authors just feel worse about themselves and their journey because they think they are the only ones.

Your not alone.

Everyone is struggling.

We just aren't talking about it.

I haven't written a word in over a week because I've been so afraid my second book will be dead on arrival like my first.

And I KNOW somewhere out there is someone just like me whose thinking of giving up.

Don't.

Just keep going.

Do your best. And then come find another struggling writer and share with each other. The world outside might not understand your struggle. But another author might.

We can't change the market. We can't change the way social media works, or how people decide if they will buy things

But what we CAN change, is whether those of us within the community want to be honest about our struggles and frustrations. Or if we want to hide them away and lie about them for the sake of making more sales

I think by being honest with one another we can create a better network.

That way the next time you feel like garbage for not being an "instant celebrity" like everyone else. you can look at the community and realize that you were never the problem

If we just keep making new writing friends our collective reach will eventually take hold in the outside world. Don't wait for a random influencer to notice you. Just make one friend at a time. Be known amongst your peers and maybe the rest will follow

And if your a writer desperate for feedback, or just a friend to share your troubles with. Hit me up. My inbox is always open.

[franeridart]

what program/brushes do you use for your art? it's so damn pretty

Easy Paint tool SAI and the default pen/brush/marker tools, mostly! and thank you!!! ;^;

Anon said:When I was a kid I would've had a crush on Akane

HECK that’s such a compliment!! Thank you!!!

Anon said:Couldn't Akane technically Control/move Kiri's hair since it's dyed? I mean it's like his hair is stained meaning it's not alive! so Akane finally warms up to him and messes with him or plays with his hair?

She can and she did! I drew her doing just that both in the first and in the fourth thing I posted about her! :D

Anon said:okay i don't know if this is coming through but i have just looked through your entire blog(can only go 4 years back) and let me just say you are wonderful, I absoluty LOVE how you paint/draw like its sooo pretty??? like dnjwcfehbi i cant describe it, (part 1) || like you are wonderful, I absolutely LOVE how you paint/draw like it's so pretty??? like dnjwcfehbi I can't describe it like it's absolutely Fabulous, Stunning, Amazing, Lovely and it looks so smoooooth like what????how??But anyways love your art and love you keep being Amazing! (part 2)

AH GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! This is such a sweet ask to get TT^TT (and you can only go 4 years back because the blog is 4 years old! Can’t believe you actually went through it all!!)

Anon said:I really love your art style and your comics are so cute and I love how you draw older Bakugou and Kirishima!! It’s all so wonderful! Thank you for sharing it with everyone!

Oh man thank you!! ;;; I’m so happy yo know you like them!!!!!! TTOTT

Anon said:the level of FLUFF and KOOKIENESS and SOFT and MARSHMALLOW and MY HEART CAN'T TOOK THIS IS is so much I could die.

PLEASE DON’T DIE I LOVE YOU !!!!! 

Anon said:I love everything about Akane's au. Her, her interactions with Bakugou, how she dislikes Kirishima but is beginning to warm up to him, the boys' aged-up designs. Everything. It's all amazing. Thank you for bringing it into my life!

Nggghhhhhhhh no anon thank you for liking her!!!!

Anon said:Currently procrastinating on my essay to go through your blog because it de-stresses me and I love your art so much like seriously h e l p

GAH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! /////

Anon said:There's something I'm not understand in your AU children kiribaku. She adopted by bakugo or she is a kid bakugou have with someone. ( I'm really really sorry for my English )

Adopted!

Anon said:Your comics are so cute and funny! I'm loving the story with Akane, the last update was great! I really like the way you draw the characters, like your style is so nice. Thanks for making my day better with your art!

G o d thank you So Much!!!!!!

Anon said:Akane is adorable, and I absolutely love the comics that you upload of her, but also on top of that your mohawk Bakugo has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and brought me back from the dead at LEAST twice.

I’M REAL GLAD TO HEAR THAT because mohawk Bakugou owns my whole soul and it’s nice to know I’m not alone in that hahaha

Anon said:What are some ways Akane messes with Kiri (or used to) when he wears red clothes? Does she often do that? Does she do it when Baku's not home, or when he is so that she can hammer in just how much she dislikes Kiri? Has she ever done anything major that caused her to be really reprimanded by Baku, but being the best person in the world Kiri did not get angry?

She really only ever gets pissy (or used to! they’re starting to get along better !!!) at Kiri when she feels jealous for whatever reason, and that doesn’t happen as often as it seems through my doodles, so it’s not like she’s always antagonistic towards him! Mostly she just ignores him, so no, it doesn’t happen often at all! And she’s never gone further than messing his hair up or tugging a bit at his clothes, since she doesn’t have the strength to move Kiri all that much haha the only reason she managed to have him fall the first time was because he was balancing already, but generally Kiri weighs way too much for her to move him around or pull at the red stuff he’s wearing enough for him to notice it all that much 

anyway, Baku never reprimended her for it - not more than he did in the first comic I posted with them, at least, specifically because the damage she can make is so minor that Kiri and Baku barely consider it something to tell her off for... if she were ever to act that way towards someone she might actually hurt (say, a kid her own age) then Baku might reprimend her more seriously, but as long as she’s just tugging at Kiri’s clothes they don’t see it as anything worth fighting her over :D

Anon said:Just sent an ask, so forgive me for this one, but I'd love to get this straight: in the Akane AU Kiri and Baku graduated and share an apartment, are madly into each other, but they neither has made a move on the other yet? Perhaps that should be sad, but it's 100% adorable.

I know I shouldn’t say this as I made the au myself, but I find the arrangement pretty dang adorable too haha they act like a married couple anyway, so it’s like... pining while the rest of the world already considers them an item? and the pining is mostly about stuff like ahhhh I wanna tell him I love him or ahhhhhh god I wanna kiss him, but then they’ll fall asleep on the couch together or hold hands just for the hell of it or cook for each other or make plans that always involve each other and all in all act as each other’s partner, so it’s mostly just like *Kaminari voice* “God these oblivious idiots” hahaha

Anon said:That latest Akane comic melted my heart like you often do. Though for a moment, I expected Eijirou to say "I don't want Katsuki to be my dad, I want him to be my daddy" XD Though that would not sound like him. Props for his adorable interactions with Scarlet Death Queen Witch.

Anon you don’t get it that’s exactly why I had him say “be his son” instead of “be my dad” LMAO it was like, a conscious wording decision hahaha thank you so much for liking my girl, btw!!!

Anon said:Fran! I was just wondering if you would be willing to post your Demon Kiri and Angel Baku art on Redbubble? I'd love to buy a print of it!! Totally understand if not. Also your newer Akane comics are killing me, they're so damn cute!! So yeah love you and your beautiful art! Hope you have an awesome year!!

I CAN TRY I think I did try last time I updated my rb? But the format of the pic made it hard to use it for a lot of things so I gave up??? I can try again tho!!! Thank you for being interested in buying it!!! And thank you for liking Akane too!!!!!

Anon said:is katsuki and kirishima not together in the adopted child comics or is there gonna be a plot to them getting together? 👀

I’m not really writing anything cohesive for it so I wouldn’t call it a plot point, but yeh they still aren’t together! And I wanna have them get to the point in which they are together!!! :D

Anon said:I'm gonna die why do you do this with your adorable art my god

PLEASE!!!!! DON’T DIE!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Your Akane + KiriBaku comics are adorable and I love the relationships that exist between them. I can't wait to see more of them!

Thank you so much!!!!!!!!!!! I hope I won’t disappoint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love your art so much!! Especially the little Akane au (so freaking cute!!!!). Random question: if you’ve ever seen Lucifer, who do you think would fit his character? Have an awesome day!

I haven’t seen it, sorry :((( but thank you for liking my girl!!!!!!

Anon said:I apologize if this has already been thought of but i feel as though when akane gets older and if she decides to be a hero, part of her costume could include useful red objects mayhaps?? Such as a shield or daggers or handcuffs so if there’s a lack of red around her she isn’t in a complete ditch. But i love your work sm ahhh💕💕

Yes!!! That’s the plan!!!!! I don’t think I’ll ever draw a teen version of her character but I MIGHT mention this idea in the current timeline, I like the idea so much TT^TT

Anon said:Hey there, I am absolutely obsessed with Akane like I love her so much wow but anyways I was wondering if you've ever drawn tododeku/ will in the future?

Thank you!!!! And I have drawn them in the past (under my tododeku tag!) and I might draw them again in the future, though currently I’m in a pretty big izu//ocha mood so I dunno when that will happen!

Anon said:I love your art so much like??? Help???

THANK YOU TTATT

Anon said:Y'know it could be gayer c'mon

This ask has been in my inbox for 17 days and I still don’t know what it means ??? but I laughed a lot when I got it so thank you anon and yes, definitely, everything could always be gayer that’s just how the world goes

Anon said:I swear you drew an older version of the krbk kids and it wasn't a fever dream I'm currently frantically searching through your blog rn help

I DID that post is CURSED anon, you can look it up through any of the tags I used to tag it and it won’t show up it won’t and I don’t know why!! I always lose it exactly because of this reason I have zero idea why it does this but??? okay I guess???????????

anyway if you still want it it’s here

Anon said:If Akane can control red things, does she low-key also have control over things that are pink and orange depending on how reddish in hue they are? I love her btw. Such a smol bean who could probably kick my ass!

What a good question you got there!! She has control over everything that has a color that falls in the red wavelength of the visible spectrum - that does include certain tones of pink and certain tones of orange, but there’s a point where orange gets too yellow or pink gets too white that her powers stop working. As long as the red in the color is more than any other hue, though, her powers work! 

Anon said: im just imagining if baku takes akane with him when he is going to work and is there with kiri and akane help kiri with his hair bc she is suffering when he tries to style it himself

Once they start getting along better Akane and Kiri actually start helping each other with their hair! They’re both very particular about it so they understand each other as far as that topic goes haha

Anon said:Hi I just wanted to say I’m really enjoying what you are doing in your latest drawing. The contrast with the thick sketchy lines and the thinner crisp ones and the spaces that have no defined line! It’s cool to see you experiment with your line work while staying true to your natural style! Sorry if this came off weird but I love seeing talented artists try pushing the boundaries of their style it’s really visually/conceptually interesting! :)

AH MAN thank you so much I’m so happy to know you like that tool TT^TT it’s really super comfy to use, so it’s nice to know someone finds it visually appealing too!!! thank you!!!!!

Anon said:Is there any chance you could make a masterpost of the aus you do? It's a lot to scroll down to the beginning of a concept u have sometimes and it can be unclear when they start

They all have a tag they’re under, tho? If I’ve made more than one post about them! I have so many AUs going around that making a masterpost with all of them is a bit... mostly so since I don’t know for how many I’ll actually go back on! But if the tags don’t really work for you (generally the link is gonna look like https://franeridart.tumblr.com/tagged/[here goes the tag]/chrono to have it in chronological order) then I can try? I can’t promise I’ll find a comfortable way to do this, tho orz sorry!

Anon said:This might be an odd ask but does Akane like Jirou? I feel like they would get along really well. And how about her grandma Mitsuki? Since she takes after Katsu who takes after her, they could make an adorably angry trio

She hasn’t spent much time with Jirou yet so right now she’s mostly meh about her (though right now she only actually likes Bakugou, and she’s warming up to Kiri, but that’s about it). She doesn’t mind Mitsuki, but she hasn’t spent too long with her either! She yells a bit too much at her dad tho, which Akane isn’t particularly fond of (protective bean that she is, she doesn’t get that that’s just their way of communicating just yet), so out of her grandparents she prefers Masaru, after all~

[rantingpaiges-blog]

Hey y’all I’m not exactly new here but this account sure is, but i only made this account specifically to rant about shit that pisses me right the fuck off. 

This blog is specifically for rants so if you don’t like rants then you don’t need to be here sweets- have a nice day :p

so anyways yeah i’m gonna start off this blog with an intro and a rant that happened not too long ago- so if you wanna keep reading go on ahead!

So its called "RantingPaiges" because well- ranting- and also pages-> paiges

ye- jokes ha ha funny

i will swear in these rants so if y’all don’t like that you may also move on yee yee- this is just how i express myself sweetly. UWU thanks-

so boom- new blog- hi, how are ya?

I wont say anyone’s names- I wont tag anyone- this is purely anon- no exposing- no witch hunt bullshit

A N O N Y M O U S

~tah dahhhhhh~

thanks for coming by! now onto the first rant-

alright so, this literally happened just a few moments ago, before making this blog. 

I have this friend, that sometimes likes to make shit up, and tell lies and try to justify their lies by adding on more bullshit to them to make themselves look “correct” when i try and tell them what they’re saying doesn’t make any fucking sense.

they brought up drawing tablets. we both like to draw, and i have a Wacom tablet named “silly” and shes just the best tiny tablet I’ve ever had and i love her. 

They brought up the tablet with “HEY DID I TELL YOU I MIGHT BE GETTING A TABLET?” cool. (also keyword here is *M I G H T* just keep that in mind ;))

 i asked right away “what brand is it?” because the brand is usually a strong saying on whether the tablet is actually a GOOD one- OR NOT!

they respond to that with “honestly i don’t know the brand”

“okay then hopefully its a good one though..” i say back.

to which they respond with, “It’s a really good tablet- i used it before, but i wear out the pen tips really fast”

okay quick question: HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU “MIGHT BE GETTING A TABLET” NOT KNOW THE BRAND NAME, BUT HAVE ALSO USED IT BEFORE YOU’VE EVEN GOTTEN IT?

OKAY DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? 

THEY D O N T HAVE THE TABLET BUT THEY HAVE USED IT BEFORE, BUT EVEN IF THEY’VE U S E D I T B E F O R E THEY DON’T KNOW THE N A M E. 

W H A T.

After fumbling around that for a solid 3 minutes like ‘what the fuck do you mean M=MC^2 8+5=10′ i just continue on with why TF their pen tips don’t last long, cause- you’re probably pressing too hard on the tablet and hurting it you dweeb.

after googling it real fast and seeing how long people say their pen tips last before they change them, I say: “if your pen tips wear out really fast you’re pressing way to hard on the tablet, sure its cool to mess around with the pressure thing with the pen, but there’s no reason to murder your pen by pushing down on the tablet hard. they’d last longer if you use light pressure"

to which they respond with: "Look I used light pressure but I draw a shit ton... Like my time I used it I fucking wore out entire tip because I just went from one project to the next "

Okay- back to the whole they’re PROBABLY GOING TO GET THE TABLET. THEY- WHAT I THOUGHT THEY SAID- D O N T H A V E I T Y E T. BUT THEY'VE BEEN USING IT-? OKAY- THEN- WHAT-THE- FUCK.

to which I ignore that fact and say, after once again searching around to make sure: "that doesn’t make any sense. if you use light pressure your pen should last longer. if they last up to like 6-15 months then its fine but if they barely last as long as 5 you’re doing something wrong."

which- maybe makes sense- right? i say 6-15 months because from what ive read around some people don’t change their for YEARS, or some people change them every 4-6 months, which could also be just preferred by the tablet user themselves- so i just ranged it around there. and depending on the use of it- which i highly doubt they use a tablet as much as they say they do because they draw on paper or their phone all the time from what i’ve seen. the PRESSURE <- they use on the pen, and/or the tablet itself is rough- okay then yeah. sure bud.

to which they respond to me with: "You do realize that my pen tips were half priced and were knock off right-? My one friend *name* told me the same thing and I gave her one of my pen tips-- to use (brand new too) and she used half of it just sketching and she was really light on her pen too"

OKAY YOU----

A) DIDN’T TELL ME THEY WERE KNOCK OFF

B) STILL HAVEN’T GOTTEN THE TABLET FROM WHAT YOU TOLD ME AT FIRST

C) SAID YOU’VE NEVER HAD A TABLET BEFORE SO WHY WOULD YOU BUY NIBS?????

THIS 👏HUMAN 👏DOES 👏NOT 👏MAKE👏 ANY 👏FUCKING👏 SENSE 👏WHAT 👏THE 👏FUCK 👏

OKAY ANYWAYS-I RESPOND WITH: "no you didn’t tell me that that explains that then. knock offs aren’t the greatest thing in the world, which is why its just better to get well known and highly rated brands. and if they’re too expensive, then holding off until you have a job would be better and save you annoyance of terrible pens. that’s what I did."

some knock offs can be good, sure, but from what they’ve said to me this alleged "knock off" isn’t good. i used to draw on my phone because i didn’t have money to spend on a tablet, so i just decided to wait until i had a job so i could save up money so I could get a computer and a tablet- which i mentioned before, is amazing and i’m so happy with her- so i could have a better experience drawing than up and getting a shitty tablet i wasn’t sure worked or didn’t know the brand. unlike this human. 🤔🤔😒

and their response was a voice recording so i’m gonna listen and copy down what they say rather than copying and pasting like i’ve been.

they say: “honest to god my tablet was a knock off, cause i had a brand picked out but the fucking name brand *blubber i don’t understand* so it was a name brand- and.... *pause* it cost 100 bucks originally and my grandparents i gave them the money and the refused to get the 100 dollar one and made me get the knock off which was 50 bucks *pause* it still works really nice. *stops to read what i just sent them* I-I CANT GET A JOB. *laughs* I’M NOT THE LEGAL AGE TO GET A JOB NOW. *laughs more*”

OKAY OKAY LISTEN. 100 DOLLARS IS FUCKING CHEAP IF YOU DON’T MIND ME SAYING. PLUS THEY HAD THE FUCKING MONEY TO GET THIS SO CALLED “NAME BRAND”-TO WHICH THEY STILL DIDN’T TELL ME THE FUCKING NAME- AND I SAID TO THEM ITS BETTER TO W A I T UNTIL YOU GET A JOB AND S A V E UP MONEY TO GET A TABLET YOU WOULD KNOW WOULD WORK BETTER THAN A KNOCK OFF WHICH YOU’VE ALREADY SAID IS SHITTY WITH THE PENS BUT IS STILL GOOD-? W H A T

ONCE AGAIN:

YOU SAID YOU M I G H T BE GETTING A TABLET, ONCE AGAIN, YET YOU BOUGHT IT- AND YOU WILL HAVE IT???? BUT YOU WONT HAVE IT BECAUSE YOU  M I G H T??? YOU HAD MONEY FOR A NAME BRAND TABLET- BUT YOU WEREN’T ALLOWED TO GET IT FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON? SO YOU INSTEAD BOUGHT A KNOCK OFF TABLET THAT WAS HALF THE PRICE, BUT FROM WHAT I’VE BEEN TOLD BY YOU, IT WOULD’VE BEEN BETTER TO TRY CHANGE YOUR GRANDPARENTS MIND TO GET A TABLET THAT YOU’RE GOING TO BUY WITH YOUR OWN MONEY- BUT AT THE EXACT SAME TIME YOU ALREADY HAVE THE TABLET AND HAVE BEEN USING IT TO FINALLY FIGURE OUT THAT THE TIPS DON’T LAST VERY LONG- W H AT? PL EA SE H E L P M E-------

TO WHICH THEY, THEN, RESPOND WITH: “i really need to get name brand stuff just the thing is is that i’m completely broke (<- YOU JUST SAID YOU HAD MONEY) and i cant get a job” 

A) YOU HAD MONEY TO GET A SUPPOSEDLY “NAME BRAND” TABLET- YOU CLEARLY SAID IT TO ME. 

B) I DIDN’T SAY YOU ABSOLUTELY HAD TO GET A JOB AT THIS VERY SECOND AND START SAVING UP MONEY IMMEDIATELY- N0- I SAID TO WAIT TO GET A JOB (BY WAIT I MEAN WHEN YOU’RE OLDER BECAUSE YOU’VE REPEATEDLY SAID TO ME THAT YOU’RE NOT OLD ENOUGH BEFORE THIS CONVERSATION) BEFORE WASTING MONEY ON A SHIT TABLET THAT THE PENS DON’T APPARENTLY LAST VERY LONG WITH EVEN THOUGH YOU APPARENTLY USE LIGHT PRESSURE, SO YOU END UP WASTING MONEY THAT YOU SAID YOU DON’T HAVE ON NIBS TO CHANGE ALL THE TIME BECAUSE THEY DON’T LAST VERY LONG-WHICH S T I L L DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE-  SO WHAT THE FUCJK IS HAPPENING WHY AM I TRYING TO FIGURE THIS OUT- YOU’RE MOST LIKELY LYING AT THIS POINT REEEEEEEEEEEEE????????????

AND I STOP TALKING TO THEM RIGHT HERE CAUSE THEY’RE JUST GONNA KEEP TRYING TO JUSTIFY THAT THEIR TABLET IS STILL GOOD WHEN THE TIPS DON’T LAST- AND GO OFF WITH RANDOM UNKNOWN STORIES- AND SAY THEY HAVE THE TABLET-WHEN THEY’VE ALSO SAID THEY*KEY WORD* M I G H T BE GETTING A TABLET STILL. 

OKAY 

OKAY

IF SOME HUMAN READ THIS WHOLE THING TAHNK YOU- IF YOU CAN SOMEHOW CLEAR THIS WHOLE STUPID THING UP THEN THAT WOULD BE F A A A A N TASTIC- 

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK.

[dwightkschrute]

In 2014 and 2015 I did a my year in review kind of thing where I, of course, reviewed it and accompanied it with a picture from that month. I somehow forgot to post 2016 (until now) and forgot to do it at all for 2017 but unfortunately, I am back with a really disappointing year. I was debating not putting myself through the legit pain of “reviewing” this year but I think of how I love going through my 2009-2010 posts and seeing how much I’ve grown so this is for you, successful and cooler future me.

2016 and 2017 were amazing but 2018 was my most promising year. My boyfriend and I were going to move in, I was going to start my dream job; everything was perfect. It definitely started out as one of the best years of my life! Then exactly halfway through the year everything changed and I was left having to pick up the pieces and completely restart, making it one of the worst years of my life.

I started January in Mexico, which was the best, but my family and I got home early in the month. I had quit my job the month before so I dedicated the entirety of this month to job hunting. Our friend (my bf’s bff who became mine and my brother’s bff early on)’s dad got a boat so it was like we got a boat too because despite the cold, we lived on it. (My boyfriend couldn’t go on the trip with us, which he was super bummed about (and that we had to spend like 10 days apart which was killer then), so he was the one to pick us up at the airport and he greeted me with a bouquet of flowers. Out of the many gifts/gestures he gave me, that was one of my favorites.)

February I started my amazing new job so life was back to 40 hour work weeks and not having much time for much else. I was always attached to the hip to my bf so almost every day after work entailed going out with him or having dinner with my family or his. That was my month. My favorite part of every February is Valentine’s Day and this one was as amazing as the rest. I don’t even have enough space (of the allotted space I give myself for each entry at least!) to describe that day. (My bf at our Valentine’s Day dinner. We finished our long day at this restaurant (so, so cool, once popular with Old Hollywood stars) on Hollywood Blvd and it was dreamy and romantic and amazing.) Oh man, I don’t have a lot of interesting things to say about March. Oh, my parents got Influenza (A/B/idk tbh), so it was two weeks of my brother, bf, and I taking care of them. My dad has a serious chronic disease so it was especially dangerous for him so it was a stressful time. Once we weren’t in hazmat suits anymore (no but really, we were gloved and double masked around them and kept them quarantined), I’d be at work or with my bf. I also started to get close with a co-worker, who I quickly became close friends with! (My bf’s two huskies. I’ve just loved that picture since I took it! I’ve never been loved by a dog more than the one in the back of this pic. Not even by my own! He has a special place in my heart.)

April was barbecues at my house or my bf’s, trying every brewery and bar around, hikes, bike rides, beach visits, baseball games, boat rides, late night cooking and baking. It was lots and lots of love and happiness and I would give absolutely anything to go back to those days. (My brother and bf grilling on Easter. This was a familiar scene, I have so many pictures of this exact scenario, yet looking at it just now made me so emotional! Stop! They’re just grilling!) May was so exciting! Very first day I got a new car! I was so happy! It was long overdue because my finicky, expensive Volkswagen had to go and I’d fallen in love with the new Honda Civic (I’ll admit I have basic taste but I don’t care!) so I finally bit the bullet and did it. This month my bf and I, after a long time of “oh wouldn’t it be nice!”, bit the bullet as well and decided to finally get serious about finding a place together. So the apartment search started, but we soon realized our home, Orange County, was super expensive. My bf, in that “ha ha jk but I’m down if you are” way, suggested we pick up and move to Oregon and I immediately agreed. It just felt right and despite us being the most careful and non-spontaneous people ever, we decided to do it! So we began to research, look for apartments but most importantly, jobs. (My car the day I took it home!)

Uhhhhhh, well, June hurts to think about! We went to visit Portland, where we decided we’d want to live because that’s where the jobs were, on a quick trip since it was strictly “business.” Portland was everything I imagined and more. We loved it and I think we loved playing house in our airbnb more than anything about the city. Back in LAX we came to the easy conclusion that though we lived Portland, that’d require a lot and for our first time moving out we’d like to stay close to home and above anything else, we just wanted to live together as soon as possible. We immediately started to look for places in LA, we spent the month apartment hunting, and towards the end of it, decided on one we really liked, one he begged me to please say yes to so we can move in already. I was so, so, so happy this month but what made me happier was seeing my bf, I swear, even happier than me. I seriously felt unstoppable and was beyond excited for our future. (I had a lot of Portland pictures to choose from but my bf and I liked this one because it reminded us of Always Sunny for some reason.)

In July, everything changed. To start, I left my job. I thought, new chapter in my life, new job coming, I’ll live really far, I should leave now. So I did. My last day was an emotional day because I loved my job so much and every single person I worked with. That very same day, my bf and I broke up. For unrelated reasons to my last day, to our moving in, to our relationship, etc. We had an amazing, amazing relationship but he has a lot of demons and issues/insecurities he has to deal with and conquer, and though I was aware and was there for him and would continue to be by his side no matter what, he decided that this was a battle he had to handle by himself and I figure before he got into a more committed situation. It didn’t have to happen, though. I hadn’t talked about the specifics of the breakup on my blog so  sorry for changing the mood of the post, but yeah, July happened and it felt like my world stopped. Really regret quitting my job now, huh? I was hit by two huge losses and changes right at the same time.  (I took this on my friend’s boat 20 tequila shots in, drunk and sad as fuck. Not to get fake deep but how sad. Literally on a boat, beautiful sunset, would rather die.)

August was a blur and I’m still not convinced I didn’t just dream it. God, alright, here we go, the rest of the year is a mess so get ready. I fell into a deep depression fast. It also didn’t help that my dad had to start getting radiation/infusions for his illness shortly after the breakup. I couldn’t believe how much my life had changed. I started dating someone else and then I dated another guy shortly after. I wanted to replace and/or forget and I really thought that’d be the solution. I was miserable when I was with them. I took absolutely any opportunity to get really drunk or high, and the opportunity came often so I spent most of my days desperately trying to not feel anything. The only time I’d feel okay was when I was extremely high and I couldn’t even think. Since I had a lot of savings for my out of state move, I had a lot of money to blow, which I did. I realized I even liked the feeling of the temporary “high” of spending a lot and receiving the stuff. I’d hang out with any friend who offered (out of boredom? loneliness?) and even ended up on a mess of a Vegas trip. Worst month ever. Maybe. (Here’s a positive! I like that bathing suit and my tiddie looks so round!)

When September came I realized two months had passed and all I had done was be a huge depressed mess. I no joke forgot about work. I just straight up forgot. I started to look for a new job, which hurt me so bad because I had to face the fact that it wouldn’t be my Cool LA Dream Job anymore. I stopped dating. Most importantly, I completely stopped drinking and smoking because it’d almost always make me sadder but also it scared me that I had no self control nor did I care. I saw a whole lot of my close friends and they, along with my immediate family, kept me afloat this month because time felt like it was going so fast. I couldn’t believe that at a blink of an eye it was night again and then a new day. Time had no mercy for me, please let me hold on. (Me at a baseball game. Tbh I’m looking at this thinking, did this really happen?)

October started out nice because my best friend of years, who I unfortunately had a falling out with three years ago, reached out to me. I’ll always give her all of the credit for doing that. I can’t begin to explain what this meant to me. It was a nice, bright shine of light that managed to shine through the dark clouds. Having my best friend is exactly what I needed. I’m a big believer in the universe acting in mysterious ways and though I had grown disappointed in its little surprise for me lately, this was the kind I always appreciate. I spent a good part of that month with her, catching up and doing things just like we did back then. It was like nothing had changed. That’s all I remember about this month, and a super fun Halloween! That day was probably one of the best days in months. (My best friend Rylee and me the first time seeing each other in 3 years. We’ve had our blogs for 8-9 years so please follow her for quality content)

November was rough. I was frustrated because surely things should had been better by then. I was still feeling so low, I was going to job interviews to no avail, I “relapsed” and had a high/drunk off my ass on a boat messy moment.. To make matters worse, I accidentally drove up on a cement divider in a parking lot and my airbags deploy, which is so expensive to fix, so my car was out of commission for a month. Then I got so sick and I rarely ever get a small cold. I seriously felt like I was cursed, even the smallest thing felt like an insult towards me. The one good thing is that since July I had been forcing myself to go to the gym five times a week. My mom said exercising was the only thing that’d help her feel that sweet release of seretonin, endorphins, dopamine, and all that good stuff when she was depressed so, though I enjoyed going to the gym before, I did it just for that reason alone. It worked and as another result I got like pretty fucking fit. Revenge body, you’re one of the few good things in my life right now. (I literally had no idea what to choose so I said fine, here’s a pic of the scene of the crime. Whatever.)

In December I turned 26. Which I hate, naturally. I went to a million more job interviews. I’m seriously so embarrassed to admit that but whatever, it’s the truth. (I have a degree, experience, and an awesome cover letter..I’ll keep blaming the curse!) What kept me sane was that we had different family members visiting from the very beginning of the month. Playing with an energetic, adorable baby kept me distracted and happy. Having so much company around also distracted me (slightly, but it helped!) from the fact that the holidays and my birthday would be quite different now. I’m one of those annoying Christmas lovers, usually at least. This year everything just happened and I didn’t care. But I survived December! (I don’t care. This is the appropriate representation of 2018 and how I feel at the end of it.)

Jesus if you’ve read all of this.. I’m sorry you had to read about the mess of my year but really more like the mess that is ME. Yknow those like “people my age I went to HS with vs me” memes? I seriously went from being that bitch with a good paying job, brand new car, a serious, great relationship with a promising future together (Like. We would color coordinate outfits! LMAO. We would have dinners with both of our families together. We were obsessed with each other. You’d roll your eyes if you saw any of this. I can’t get over how perfect we were, it’s hilarious what happened to us.) and then at the blink of an eye I went to not having absolutely any of that, casually dating (something I’d NEVER done) anyone who resembled my ex and sadly and drunkenly puking off the side of a pier. Who is she? I don’t know, I got whiplash. (Queen of parentheses and side notes, I know. But another thing about me is... I’ve never been affected by people leaving my life. I’m used to it. I’ve never been anywhere as affected as I was when my ex and I broke up. This isn’t normal for me, my ENTJ/Capricorn ass doesn’t know what this feeling is.)

Please curse that has been put on me, release me. Whoever is attacking my voodoo doll, calm down! Please! I’ve gone through enough sadness and loss. If 2019 is even slightly as bad, I’m going to be like that pigeon I reblogged the other day that’s like “fuck this I’m just going to sit here.” I can’t even make a cute but corny, hopeful “hope 2019 is great!” comment. I’m literally begging you...pleading you... I don’t believe in karma but after all of this shit, I better have something much better in stock for me. “Good things are coming!” I fucking hope so. Like, I’ll be even more annoying right now and say that it’s not fair that I didn’t get to have the future I was about to have. I don’t care about any cliche you may have for me. One door closes, everything happens for a reason, God has a plan, etc. No. Why did all of this have to happen? What can be better than the future I was going to have? I felt so unlucky. It all feels like a nightmare and I’m just waiting to feel whole again. Oh shit I got really intense. I know I’ll get over it and life will be good again eventually but for now, I am still so mad. I would have never in a million years guessed this is how my 2018 would go. 

So fine, I’ve accepted things now, so now I’m impatient and say please prove me wrong, 2019. I’m THREATENING you to be amazing!

[cryptidofthekeys]

*s q u e a k s *

I arrive here because reposting the post thingy can get pretty long and hard to scroll through when there is several

But i couldn't just NOT reply to your heartwarming message LIKE-- holy shit i made an audible squeal what?? Man reading your replies and just the random stuff you type on your blog always makes me so giddy what the hell. But no like- I'm happy that you enjoyed my drawings! People usually have a set image of what their characters look like- and it can be hard to match that without seeing it in a picture- so its always a joy when that person likes the drawing :].

AND I WOULD GLADLY ACCEPT JEREMYS HELP IF HE WANTS TO GIVE IT. That dude is just-- *holds gently* jshfhfhf. Love em to bits.

Tags time Tags time but i can not put tags herrrreee:

Yeah genuinely, was being 100% honest with you there! I'm flattered that your flattered if that makes sence- that you got a little teary eyed(in the good way), like that warms my heart to know.

I was definitely taken aback that you've been through a similar scinario to mine in regards to having a filtered mind- and once again it's comforting to know this shfhhd. Although mine was based around Religion and some cult-like aspects-, the impact different things can have on how open someone is can surprisingly lead to similar results!

I'm overjoyed that you were able to get out of your filtered mindset, i cant imagine how refreshing it must be! :D. It fills me with inspiration and hope for a better future for myself ^^.

Honestly, like I write the best description I can of my OCs to the best of my ability, like imma be honest for example certain hairstyles can be so fuckin hard for me to describe, I usually have to search up a list and see what their called essentially, except for like, the quiffs n stuff obviously-

I always feel honored though when someone wants to draw my OCs, like im not a very particular person for details unless I specify some very intricate ones like for example, if I specify a scar on certain characters and what the scar is- then i get be a lil particular about it but just,, in general i dont really mind-

and oh Jeremy absolutely would! Jeremy loves puppets, loves puppet-making and to see someone with similar interests, he might have p bad anxieties n shit like that but by g o d s is he going to try and help out with the puppet making process, tbh he’d probs tune into that and forget even that he was talking to a person beforehand, just saying s o much about the process to the point where,, it might be overwhelming hjgkfjfdks

and yeye I get’cha, no worries and oh yeah I used to filter myself a lot, like the best example I can use for filtering myself would have to be wrestling, like I used to NEVER open up or talk too much bout it, guess I was afraid of being judged n shit like that but now? Imma be honest, even if someone does ever judge me, I legit?? dont? Care?? Like its MY blog and I get to decide the content i wanna post, not anyone else- and yeah, its a weird thing, that filtered mindset was- and sometimes i still get it even, like sometimes my brain will be mean about it like ‘dude, your going to be annoying, dont’

but its definitely not as bad as it used to be, while i still struggle and probs always will- im definitely getting better at just sayin fuck it and posting what i want whenever i want too, but yeah its refreshing once you break the chains just take it easy, step back if you get too overwhelmed but I believe in ya, one day that filtered mindset will eat shit on the pavement while your out here doin’ what you wanna do

[heavyyhearts-blog]

actually heres my side

“ first, before getting to real stuff, aya has done this to other people in the past too. when she talked about them to me she said they abused her or abandoned her suddenly. i’ve only talked to one of these people, but they confirmed that aya actually abused, and then stalked them when they cut her off. i don’t have permission to post these logs so out of respect i won’t put them here. “

ive never been very clear in talking about my past experiences with most people. you make this sound as if every person that's ever "abandoned me" were all "abused" by me, when that's not the case. have i acted in shitty ways to some people? yes, but it never had anything to do with me being abandoned, at any point. one of these people, actually straight up disappeared from my life, and i have no idea why. they disappeared off skype and i havent seen them since. we had no problems between eachother whatsoever. a different example i can think of for someone i was talking about? they left because i was too stressful to be around. as in, i always complained too much and that kind of thing and it was too much to be around. i didnt even know them very long.  another example of a person i mentioned with that: they had really bad schizophrenia and like, trauma issues, and what happened there? they'd randomly like? actually start basically splitting on me and getting extremely angry at me out of nowhere for no reason, which i tried to be really tolerable of, until things basically got too much for either of us to handle and after a bit of dumb drama, we separated with , i believe, no hard feelings.

my point being? when i say "ive been abandoned by a lot of people" or whatever, im not literally claiming that i was abused by literally everyone and im some huge victim, lol. that last example? you could probably say i was abused due to the level of pent up anger they were throwing at me, , unprovoked

“ i’ve only talked to one of these people, but they confirmed that aya actually abused, and then stalked them when they cut her off “

first of all, this happened literal years ago. second of all, this person is still full of shit and i can't believe they still insist all of these bullshit lies. "aya stalked me" i hadnt visited your blog for months, i'd literally forgotten about you, yet you somehow still had it set in your head that i was "stalking" you. i wanted to remake my blog for a multitude of reasons, and one of them being, a more back of my mind thing, was, i didnt want you viewing my blog. so i remade. and, like, 2-3 days later, i got paranoid that you had somehow found my new blog, entirely new, so i asked my friend to go see if my new url was on there, because i didnt want to go back on your blog myself. and sure enough, there it was, my new url, even though i hadn't given it out to anyone or posted it anywhere, meaning you literally searched through notes of a post or something along those lines to find it. yeah ive explained this so many times now its fun :) not to mention your shitty friend(s) that would constantly twist my words around and lie saying i was doingthings that i didnt. and your only "proof" was logs of talking shit about me behind my back to one of my friends, you had no screenshots of me doing anything, because guess what, i never did it. wow. "i dont have screenshots because i deleted them all" okay bud. anyway

and now here's my main issue with everything: you are "calling me out" for things we have already personally talked about, that we either resolved, or i apologized for/said that i would try to stop doing so i can better myself which i have actually done? so i literally do not understand why youre calling me out for shit as if im some malicious person trying to hurt people that's just completely incapable of getting better or whatever. lets start

“i’ve tried to cut her off several times, both by trying to talk and express my want to stop talking to her first and by just blocking/ignoring her on everything. i made it clear i wanted to stop talking the first couple of times. she will spam and beg me and make new accounts if she has to. once ive added her back however she’s used that against me”

okay youre calling me out for this but you admitted what you did was fucked up too? and i dont know what else to even say to this other than im going to try to stop getting so attached to people like that so i maybe dont have such bad mental breakdowns every time i thnk someone close to me is leaving like sorry i cant. help feeling that way or control this thing specifically unless i just dont get attached like that at all, which is my fault.

[x] [x] [x]

here, you post a completely out of context rant from me, where i got mad at something you did that you literally admitted was fucked up. full context!

[x] [x] [x] [x] [x]

you even told me you had no idea what you were talking about with any of it.

“ one of the times that we weren’t talking she DMd my twitter mutuals asking them to screenshot my recent tweets. “

i told you my reason for it. i was extremely paranoid that you were talking shit about me behind my back and i wanted to know if you were or not, even though i did it in a really shitty way. i instantly felt so beyond terrible that i had done that. i was sobbing the entire time i was trying to apologize for how fucked up and wrong it was of me to do that, and even apologized for it again later after it had happened already. because i wanted to make sure you knew how sorry i was for it. i cant take something like that back.

[x] [x]

“recently, after getting so upset with me for doing the same thing in the past, she randomly blocked me on everything and refused to talk to me. i would understand if she hadn’t previously gotten so mad and upset at me for the exact same thing. “

?? i split really bad just like i already have been, due to , as i've already exlpained, the nonstop bad things we've had between us for months, to the point i havent been able to talk to you like normal anymore, because just seeing you pisses me off and everything you say/do will just piss me off. i cant help that. its not my fault. i cant just not split like that because we've had fucked up problems for months, that, guess what, shouldnt even be public here for all reasons ive already stated! but i also did it just because ive been deciding i need to get away from you for good, that i dont WANT to talk to you at all anymore. sucks to be treated the way you treat others right.

“ i posted on my twitter saying i wanted to drink and she instantly messaged me begging and spamming me not to “

and everything else like stalling, pressuring you etc. this is still. we talked about this. i said sorry. i got better about it. why do i have a callout.

[x] [x]

like this is literally all just trying to make me look bad in ways that i'm not. nice try, though!

“ when i cc’d bakugou and she tried to make me explain my trauma to make it Valid “

you're trying to make me look bad again. i was just asking because i was anxious wanted to know the reasoning for it and im sorry for pressing it at all but that doesnt mean i was trying to make you explain it so it could be "valid" shut the fuck up lol i even explained to you afterwards why it made me so uncomfortable and that it didnt bother me anymore, that i thought you were just blindly cc'ing him for no real reason like i just assumed it wasnt a coping thing or anything and thats my fault but??? youre trying to make me look bad for it so??? i'd even keep sending you fanart of him like.

[x]

“ she was extremely dependent on me and would spam me if i fell asleep before she woke up, she’d got upset and started splitting on me because i didn’t return her feelings of attraction. “

wat...

“ second, she’s blaming everything on her BPD and “not being able to help it,” or “can’t control herself” “

well, as you can clearly see, ive been anything but that??? but if you wanna keep telling yourself that, go ahead. have i said things LIKE that before? yes, when i was freaking out, over certain things i actually can't help, for example: abandonment trauma??? and like i said before: i need to try to not get so attached to people in the first place so that doesnt happen anymore! otherwise, should some sort of situation like that happen again, i can't handle getting that level of upset. so i prevent that by not getting that level of attached at all. like sorry but theres certain things nobody can help, even you. you're just trying to make it sound like this entire thing has been nothing but "i cant help it"

and lastly, we can't forget the fact that, for a long time, you wouldn't tell me anything. literally anything. i would repeatedly ask you. "what do i do that bothers you what am i doing wrong" etc and all you'd ever say was "idk" 95% of the time. i had absolutely no idea that for the longest time, i had been saying a lot of manipulative, shitty things and acting bad and etc, slash i had no idea that some of my episodes were actually affecting you that badly until way too late.

when you first told me that i had been acting so shitty, through a jpeg meme that was making fun of me, did i realize how awful i was being. i honest to god never had any idea and i explained this to you countless times. that i was  oblivious/i can be oblivious to shitl ike that and that i need you to tell me, otherwise I WONT KNOW.

nice meme. :) but yeah clearly this is still an accurate representation of me, right?

[x] [x]

yeah, you got me though. im a toxic, abusive piece of shit that will never get better, all i do is hurt others, i can't change, ive never apologized, ive never gotten better. totally

and since we're playing this game,

and now that i've said all this, i have nothing else to say. i can't make anyone believe me, but if you do, thanks.

[euphoricguk]

Out And About

Member/Pairing: Jimin x Taehyung/VMin 

Genre: Pierced! Jimin AU; Nerd Brother! Taehyung AU; High School! AU; MxM

Word Count: 1.6K 

Triggers/Warnings: Cursing

Author Note:  A while ago I wanted to write a Pierced! Jimin AU because well...do I need to say more? I also wanted to try some new stuff on this blog so here’s my gay mxm debut. Hope y’all enjoy~

“...Anyway, he failed me because I didn’t write the paper so, now I have detention.”

“I fucking told you that guy was an asshole when you signed up for his class. ‘Wholesome, educational environment’ my ass... You’re still coming tonight though, right?”

Jimin was seated on top of the blue lunch tables of the cafeteria, back curved as he looked down at Yumi who was seated on the bench in front of him, stuffing her face with a ham and cheese sandwich from the deli.

“I planned on it,” she said before swallowing her bite, quickly leaning back down to take another one, “but I don’t know. I’m not going to screw myself over and fail his class and have to retake it next year, so...I kind of need to go so I can make up the paper, you feel?”

“I get you, ” he trailed off. Easily distracted, Jimin’s eyes roamed the seemingly endless flocks of students crowded in the food court, a look somewhere between disgust and interest plastered across his face. Only when he saw a girl coming out with a slice of pizza did he remember he had been starving all day.

“Let me get a bite,” Jimin said as he reached down toward Yumi’s sandwich and, in turn, got his hand swatted at.

“Go get your own food, loser.”

As his lips turned up into a smirk, the sun shined down directly onto his face, making his nose ring glisten in the spring daylight.

“Fuck you,” he said, jumping down from the table and picking up his backpack.

“No, thanks. I don’t like little girls.”

“Ha ha, very funny.” After grabbing his drink, Jimin began walking away from the table, slipping his sunglasses onto his face as if he was some kind of pop star. “Aye!”

Yumi looked up from her sandwich and closed her mouth, which was preparing to take another bite. “What?”

“Did you ever get around to asking your brother if he wanted to come with us?”

A few weeks ago when the idea of throwing a party first came up, Jimin had suggested that Yumi ask her little brother to come along, too. 

Taehyung. 

The class nerd that had straight A’s, played tennis, and read books for fun.

“Taehyung? Kim Taehyung? The 11th grader? My little brother? Why would you want him to come hang with us,” Yumi asked in complete shock the day Jimin asked her about it.

Yumi’s friends, quite obviously, were not the straight A type. More like...straight C’s and D’s...and the occasional B from Jun or Yumi in subjects that a 6th grader could pass.

“I don’t know,” Jimin had said while he laid in the grass field of the park him and Yumi frequented, “we never invite him to go anywhere with us and every time I come over to your place, he’s always in his room studying something… Seems kinda boring, don’t you think?”

Yumi, who was lying down next to him, feet toward his head (she had kicked him in the face a few times “on accident”), sat up at his statement. A look of confusion and disbelief was on her face as she thought about what her best friend had just told her.

“Bro. Did you like...smoke or something before coming here? What you’re saying doesnt even make any sense. First of all, you hated my brother when you first met him in middle school and once we became friends you still picked on him. Now, all of sudden, you feel sorry for the dude? What the fuck Jimin.”

“Look,” he shouted and then huffed in frustration before continuing. “I’m not saying he’s my best friend. I’m just saying. It wouldn’t kill you to just ask him. All I want you to do is ask, okay? Jesus Christ.”

Squinting her eyes at him suspiciously, Yumi only shrugged and replied with a simple “Okay.”

“Yeah, I asked him,” she turned around and placed one leg on each side of the lunch bench and faced Jimin. “He said no.”

“Oh… Uh, okay cool. Later. You better come tonight.”

“Worry about yourself, Chim Chim.” As a reply, Jimin simply put up a peace sign as he walked away.

“Yumi!”

“What do you want, Tae? I’m kind of busy.” Yumi rummaged through her drawers as she searched for something to wear, throwing clothes all over her room.

“Have you seen my highlighters? ...And can you like, not change in front of me, please,” Taehyung said as he covered his glasses.

“No, I havent and calm down I have a bra on. Just turn around if it bothers you so much.”

“Ugh, okay. Thanks,” he said as he turned around to leave.

In the middle of tying her shoelaces, Yumi received a message.

Hey, sorry but i cant make it 2nite. stomach ache

From: The Dork™, 10:09 PM

“Hey, Tae! Come lock the door, I’ll be back later. Make sure you eat something besides graph paper and science textbooks,” she yelled up at Taehyung’s room before walking out.

Uh...why aren’t you coming?

From: Yumi , 10:26 PM

Damn r u blind or something? s t o m a c h a c h e

From: The Dork ™ , 10:28 PM

I saw the “stomach ache” but that’s bs and u know it

From: Yumi, 10:29 PM

so y dont u wanna go dude?

From: Yumi, 10:29 PM

idk just not feelin it

From: The Dork™ , 10:31 PM

K well I’ll drink a beer for u

From: Yumi , 10:33 PM

hav fun brooooo!1!!!!!!1111!!1!1

From: The Dork™ , 10:34 PM

-_-

From: Yumi , 10:35 PM

“Did you see Min when he tried to walk on water and almost drowned in the pool?” Yumi laughed when she pictured the look on his face once he got out. Fumbling with her keys she made her way upstairs, plopping down on her bed as soon as she could.

“I know!! It was crazy… Well, I’m gonna go grab some food. I might call you later tonight.” She nodded and hung the phone up, rubbing her belly while it grumbled.

Despite almost tripping three times while going downstairs, Yumi successfully made herself a gourmet meal called cereal. As she ate at the dining table, out of the corner of her eye, she spotted a pair of black boots that looked awfully familiar to Jimin’s. Same color and everything.

Hm. That’s weird. 

Maybe he left them here last time he came, Yumi thought to herself. Placing her bowl in the kitchen sink, she began her retreat back up the stairs where she nearly face planted only once.

When u were here last week did u leave ur black boots?

From: Yumi , 3:29 AM

Opting to read his reply in the morning versus waiting for it, she locked her phone and threw it on the computer chair to the left of her. Just as she was about to fall asleep, eyes closed and snuggled up to her pillow, Yumi heard giggling coming from the room next door to her.

Taehyung’s room.

Tae, your cartoons seriously aren’t that funny shut the hell up and go to sleep, she mumbled to herself as she turned over and grabbed her blanket to cover her ears.

Rather than getting up the first time, Yumi decided to give him a chance to knock it off himself. The first time she didn’t say anything. The second time she didn’t say anything.

However, the third time… The third time she couldn’t help but growl in frustration as she sat up, pulled the blanket off of her, and made her way across the hall to her brother’s door. Without knocking, Yumi stormed into his room.

“Kim Taehyung! It’s like 4 o’clock in the fuc-”

She couldn’t tell if she was hallucinating at the moment, but she was positive she saw Taehyung, her little brother, and Jimin, her best friend, cuddling with each other on Taehyung’s bed.

“I… Am I insane or…”

Both Jimin and Taehyung looked beyond shocked as they stared wide-eyed at Yumi standing in the doorway, looking equally as shocked, if not more.

“Uh,” started Jimin as he cleared his throat and sat up in Taehyung’s bed, “well...you’re not insane…”

“Wait, wait, wait. You two are… You and him are… YOU DITCHED ME TONIGHT FOR HIM?!”

“Yeah… Sorry about that I would’ve told you b-”

“I can’t believe you guys kept this from me. How long has this even been going on,” Yumi asked, shifting the weight on her feet and crossing her arms over her chest.

“About six months, right,” Taehyung answered as he looked at Jimin, who was fiddling with the jewelry hanging from his lip (a nervous habit of his), for confirmation.

Scoffing at the situation and her own cluelessness, Yumi was still thoroughly speechless. For a few awkward, silent minutes, no one said anything. Taehyung and Jimin couldn’t help but stare at Yumi, who was clearing trying to make sense of the situation as she furrowed her eyebrows and bites at her nails while staring at the ground.

Her sigh is what breaks the thick, silent air.

“Look, I just came in here to tell you to shut up but, obviously, this,” she motioned toward Jimin and Taehyung, “wasn’t what I was expecting.”

“Yumi, we can expl-”

“First, there’s nothing to explain. The situation is pretty clear since most guys don’t hold hands and cuddle in each other’s bed unless there’s something going on. Second, your relationship doesn’t bother me, although I would’ve liked to know about it. I’m not mad at you,” she looks at Taehyung and then at Jimin, who she shoots a glare at, “...two.”

Yumi turned around to begin walking out of the room and stopped just before closing the door.

“And stop giggling so loud. Some people do enjoy sleeping,” she said and then closed the door after.

“...well, that d-”

“And good night, losers,” Yumi yelled across the hall before closing her bedroom door.

Masterlist | Requests: Open!

[i-amusemyself]

All 100 Questions.

Bloody hell okay thank you!!! 😄😄😄

1. Is a kiss considered cheating?Yeah, Id say so.

2. Have you ever faked orgasm?Aint never had anyone to fake it with 😂 Ngl tho its the sort of thing id do (which is terrible i know)

3. If you could have one super power, what would it be?Mind reading.

4. Do you think youre gonna be rich in 7-8-9 years?I’d be worried if I didnt have more money than I have now, but idk.

5. Tell us some funny drunk story?Oh jeez erm, I don’t really have any 😂 My friends occasionally remind me of the time at the school christmas ball one of the business teachers turned up and I quickly ran away while aggressively whispering “oh no he knows im a lesbian, aimee told him”.

6. Why are you no longer together with your ex?We work better as friends, its less stressful.

7. If you had to choose one way to die what would it be?See I’m really torn with this question. Part of me thinks itd be nice just to go in my sleep, with a heart attack or something. Its quick and painless you know.But equally I wonder if it would be better to maybe, like, have something where I knew I was gonna die. Because then I’d have time to try and do everything on my bucket list and say goodbye to everyone. Also maybe at that point I’d welcome death lmao.

8. What are your current goals?Idk? Im waiting on A level results which I really hope I’ve done well in.I hope to make lots of new friends at uni and learn how to look after myself quickly I guess. I dont know.

9. Do you like someone?I like a lot of people 😆

10. Who was the last person to disappoint you?Im really not sure??? There arent many people I expect anything from and even then my standards are pretty low. So like, I dont really get disappointed by people, only occasionally by situations.

11. Do you like your body?I could hate it a lot more, but I wouldnt say I’m happy with my body or general appearance. I struggle a lot with my features and my weight and the scars I have (which is ridiculous but thats what mental illness is)

12. Can you keep a diet?I mean if I wasnt on the diet im on rn (with lots of restrictions) id probs be in hospital 😂

13. If the whole world was listening to you right now, what would you say?Honestly id pass out under the pressure of it 😂 idk, id tell them all to take a chill pill but no one would listen.

14. Do you work?Nah, i had 3 jobs at once last yeah but now I’ve ended up with none.

15. If you could choose only one food to eat for the rest of your life what would it be?Either garlic bread or chocolate I cant decide!

16. Would you get a tattoo?I’m v much planning on getting one in the near future so yh!!

17. Something you dont mind spending all your money on?Plane tickets.

18. Can you drive?Yeah! I havent driven since I passed my test, but hopefully I havent forgotten how to that quickly!

19. When was the last time someone told you youre beautiful?…I cant remember. Thats depressing (not that I blame them).

20. What was the last thing you cried for?Argh I have no idea why I was crying, my brain just wasnt doing its job so everything made me stressed and sad.

21. Do you keep a journal?I keep a blog for diary posts but besides that nah

22. Is life fun?If you allow it to be, yeah

23. Is farting in front of people irrelevant?Tf is that supposed to mean? I guess if you know the person well it is.

24. Whats your dream car?I dont know about Dream Car, id have to research it loads to decide what my absolute fave it. Although rn I’d really love a ‘67 VW beetle bc theyre small and cheap on insurance 😂

25. Are grades in school important?My own grades are super important to me, (to the point its probably unhealthy) but in terms of how the people around me do, it doesnt really matter to me. I mean, I want everyone to do well, but I dont judge people based on it.

26. Describe your crush.She’s funny and all around awesome and interesting and good at deep convos and beautiful and way out of my league.

27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you?The last one I read called The Bell Jar. It was unlike anything I’ve ever read and made me think about a lot of things. Also I related a lot with the main character.

28. What was your last lie?Eh, probably “im fine”.

29. Dumbest lie you ever told?Idk?? I only keep track of the good lies 😉

30. Is crying in front of people embarrasing?It shouldnt be but yeah, I try my best not to.

31. Something you did and are proud of?Umm, idk im p proud of playing basketball and representing my region/training with england. But i quit that so 👏 dicks out for my regrettable decisions 👏

32. Whats your favourite cocktail?Never had one

33. Something you are good at?Annoying people and being clingy 😂 also maths ig

34. Do you like small kids?It depends on the child, the day of the week, the lunar cycle, my menstrual cycle, how hungry I am…Yh legit sometimes I hate them sometimes I love them.

35. How are you feeling right now?Great omg I just got my best friend to watch mamma mia and now shes high on life next to me.

36. What would you name your daughter/son?🤐 there are a couple of names for girls I like and like 2 boys names? But i dont wanna say bc theyre embarrasing.

37. What do you need to be happy?Good company, good food and possibly music.

38. Is there someone you want to punch in the face right now?Theres always at least 3 people I would love to punch 😂

39. What was the last gift you recieved?My best friend got me a necklace and I almost cried its so beautiful

40. What was the last gift you gave?The gift of my company @only-slightly-dangerous 😉😉😉

41. What was the last concert you went to?I went to to see Amber Run in february

42. Favourite place to shop at?Um, as in shop? A place called blue banana probs (england’s hot topic smh)

43. Who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander bc they helped me to understand who I am and how I feel and to be loud and proud about it.And Luke Cutforth bc he’s so open about his mental health and struggles with self harm but hes so happy now.

44. How old were you when you first got drunk?18 lmao

45. How old were you when you first got high?It aint happened yet (and i dont really want it to)

46. How old were you when you first had sex?It aint happened yet smh

47. When was your first kiss?As far as im concerned never

48. Something you want to do until the end this year?What….does this mean….? Idk???

49. Is there something in the past you wish you hadnt done?It’s more stuff I wish I had done tbh. I suppose I said things I shouldnt have or got too involved in drama, but you kinda need all that secondary school shit to learn from it

50. Post a selfie.Lmao nah fam

51. Who are you most comfortable around?My best friend by a mile. Privacy who?

52. Name one thing that terrifies you.Abandonment without explanation.

53. What kind of books do you read?Anything non fiction about medicine/being a doctor/disease/psycopaths.Besides that whatever has been recommended.

54. What would you tell your 12 y/o self?1. Youre gay2. You and I both know you arent joking about being “a dude trapped in a girls body” stop laughing it off and confront it.3. Stand up for yourself.4. Chill out.5. Laugh a lot more omg

55. What is your favourite flower?It’s between petunias and roses

56. Any bad habits you have?Not answering peoples messages unless theyre Certain Person A or Certain Person B.

57. What kind of people are you attracted to?Ones that are out of my league and could kick my ass apparently. Also ones that are kind, listen and think a lot I guess

58. What was the last thing you cried for?Already answered

59. Is there something you dont eat? A food that truly disgusts you?I dont eat loads of stuff bc my guts hate me 😂 but besides all that I’m actually the worlds least picky eater. The only thing I dont like is raw tomato. Thats it.

60. Are you in love?I wish

61. Something you find romantic?All the clichés ngl 😂 just anything that says “i love you” or “i was thinking about you” really

62. How long was your longest relationship?Like 4 months? Barely long term.

63. What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex?Oh jeez i hate these theyre so stereotype-y1. Bitching2. Not supporting each other3. ….?

64. What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex?1. Not supporting each other2. Massive egos3. Yelling

65. What are you saving money for?Uni so I dont starve to death!

66. How would you describe your bad side?Hmm, idk, it depends what someone did to get on my bad side. I’d say stubborn, bitter and angry tho usually.

67. Are you actually a good person? Why?I could be wrong but I think so long as someone has morally good intentions they are usually a good person, whether they always succeed or not. So yeah, I like to think I am.

68. What are you living for?My friends and the hope I have for my future.

69. Have you ever done anything illegal?Piracy? Thats it.

70. Do you like your money?….did I type this question wrong or??

71. Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally?Okay, the honest answer? Yeah. When I was a lot younger and less mature and someone said something that hurt me, I tried to retaliate with equally hurtful comments. I like to think I wouldnt do that now.

72. Ever sent nudes?Lol no

73. Have you ever cheated on someone?Hell no

74. Favourite candy?All candy hates me 😂

75. Is there a blog you visit everyday or almost every day? Tag them.Yeah @oneshappyplace knows I regularly spam her with notes in search or Quality Memes (im so sorry)

76. Do you play any computer games? Whats ur fave?Nah, as if I have time 😂

77. Favourite TV series?Argh I canny choose? I love the IT Crowd, I love supernatural, I love Sherlock, I love in the flesh…

78. Are you religious? Does God exist?I’m not religious and personally I don’t believe there’s a god or higher power but I could be wrong.

79. What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?The Bell Jar. See 27.

80. What do you think about vegetarians and veganism?I respect it I guess? At one point I was p much a vegetarian until I had to restrict my diet sooo. Tho I could never be one now, let alone a vegan.

81. How long have you been on tumblr?Too long 😂😂😂 Like 3 or 4 years?

82. Do you like chinese food?Love it!

83. McDonalds or Subway?(Never been to subway so) McDonalds.

84. Vodka or Whisky?(Never had whisky so) Vodka.

85. Alcohol or Drugs?(Never had drugs so) Alcohol.

86. Ever been out of your country?I’m currently in the USA so yeah 😂

87. Meaning behind your blog name?It’s p self explanatory and also v true

88. What are you scared of?Abandonment, deep water, knives, toys with battery packs.

89. Last time you were insulted?Ugh, probs like when I met up with a load of school friends for our leaver’s ball.

90. Most traumatic experience?I’d rather not answer that lmao (plus itd take a long time to type)

91. Perfect date idea?Chilling and listening to each other’s favourite songs while coexisting and eating fast food 😂 that or ikea ngl

92. Favourite app on your phone?Tumblr. Even though I hate it, it also keeps me sane.

93. What colour are the walls in your room?White and blue.

94. Do you watch youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber?I love so many youtubers omg. Lukeisnotsexy, mileschronicles, realisticallysaying and filthy frank are faves

95. Share your favourite quote.Pick your fights.

96. What is the meaning of life?To live life to the fullest so youre happy and have minimal regrets. Also to be kind and helpful so even if you dont change the world you might help someone else to.

97. Do you like horror movies?I think….? But I’m not good at watching them alone 😂

98. Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened?Eh…again, would rather not answer (we got some nice supressed memories here)

99. Do you feel lucky or special in any way?I’m still totally in awe of how lucky I am to have met my best friend from 3000 miles away. Like, the probability of it was so so slim and yet here we are.

100. Can you keep a secret?I think so yh! It’s something that I consider super important.

[franeridart]

This might be too much to ask but I broke my laptop and only have access to mobile and I'm dying to know what I'm actually missing but I can't check would you be able to describe it? Sorry I know this is annoying ignore it if it's too much trouble

It’s not annoying so don’t worry about it, but my posts should all be visible, now? At least my app doesn’t give me the option to request a review anymore… if you can’t see them still they’re all (aside from the one I posted earlier) backed up on my wordpress blog! You can see them from there without me needing to describe them~

Anon said:Franeri-san what dimensions do you usually use for your canvas? When I draw I end up making the canvas too small, so when i zoom in to make details it becomes pixelated. But I also don’t need my canvas too big because I won’t be able to proportion it;; it’s a visual thing… Ah I’m rambling sorry

I use a 6000pxx5000px with a 4px brush, usually, but I really rarely use it all, mostly it’s just like, corners of the whole thing. I tend to draw a lot of things on the same canvas before switching to a new one - that said, personally I can’t draw properly if I don’t zoom in above 100% (usually I work at 150% or 200%, more for details) so I’m really not the right person to ask this haha

Anon said:I saw that profanity is now being blocked more heavily by safe search so our good, good but foul mouthed Baku may be the reason your stuff is hidden. You’ve probably already heard this but I thought I’d let you know~

Rip so I heard orz though let’s not give our Baku all the fault here, I swear a lot by myself too haha I’m my own ruin, seems like - thank you for taking your time to share the info, anyway!!

Anon said:I’m really happy about your blog not being censored seriously. CAUSE YOU MAKE WONDERFUL DRAWINGS THAT FILL MY HEART AND I WAS STARTING TO PANICK. Keep up the good work~. 🖤

And I’m really happy you can properly see my blog, you sweet sweet cute and adorable anon!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:Hello! First, I love your art and your headcanons and stories! I am in love with bakushima half because of you, you beautiful tart. Second, about Bakugo’s laugh, holy crikey, of course he’s loud and explosive. The boy is a ball of stress and anger and when he laughs for real, it’s rare and takes effort. But like, can you just imagine when his explodo-kill mask cracks his face turns red because he doesn’t want to laugh. But THEN he barks out a laugh and everybody’s stunned and then he just SNORTS

YES!!!!!!! Oh my god yes that’s an hc I have he definitely, definitely snorts when he tries to hold back his laughter it’s so effin adorable I die every day a lot bless that kid

Anon said:Who tops of in your opinion in Bakushima?👀

Maybe either, maybe neither, depends on many things but mostly on how I don’t ever ask myself this question for any of my ships so I got no answer for it at all ever - instead we should ask ourselves the important questions, like who opens the water bottles between them (Kirishima when Bakugou’s palms get too sweaty and Bakugou’s forever resentful about it), who kicks when they sleep and who always ends up sleeping on the floor because of it (Bakugou’s the restless sleeper, poor Kirishima), who takes way too damn long in the bathroom goddamnit Kirishima get out of there already I swear to go——-

Anon said:your blog makes me really happy just keep doing you you’re like the best thing

Thank you so much holy smokes!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:wait wait wait wait! is Bakugou the one teaching Shark Kirishima sign language?? then does that mean Kirishima learned to sign ‘I love you’ from Bakugou!? (Q/)////(\Q)

They’re learning together!! They have an online dictionary and follow online courses, so Kirishima kind of looked it up for himself at first - he was signing it as love instead of really like thoug, which made Bakugou indecently flustered so in the end, yes, he was the one to teach him how to properly sign it :D

Anon said:Will you still be updating this blog?

Sure will! The wordpress one is just a backup thing!

Anon said:wait so question: in the mer au, does kiri know jsl from before? because the way he reacted to bakugou first attempting to sign at him looked like he recognized it but you said they both had to learn? does he react like that because he recognizes it as bakugou actively trying to communicate? (btw this au is So Good i love how kaminari is just “why are you like this” at kiri but his Gay Ass cant be swayed)

I’m glad you like it!!!!! And nope Kiri didn’t know jsl from before, but mers do have something similar to a sign language (there’s deaf and mute merpeople too, after all) so he recognized it as Bakugou going “I want to talk to you and this is the best way to” - also, he’d never seen a tablet before and Bakugou was showing him an explosion on it to make him understand and instead he went “what is this SORCERY” and got excited about a gif. Good, pure kid. I had no clue how to add that in the comic in a fast way tho so let’s leave it at him being happy they found a possible way to communicate haha

Anon said:Hi Fran!!! Hace you reas the theoriws aboyo kiri o kaminari Boeing traitors? Si you know where they came up? I’m lil bit lost even tho I’m up with the man lmao ALSO pls more maki-chan

So pretty much at some point in the middle of a meeting Present Mic mentioned how there probably was a traitor between them that kept on feeding the villains infos about UA, and the fandom of course got interested in that!! Who could it be? They started thinking it through and for some reason the theories that ended up being more popular are about it being either Kaminari, Kirishima or Hagakure - I don’t think any of these are true, but if you google search “kaminari traitor theory” or the same with the other two names you should easily find the posts explaining the theories and where they come from, if you’re interested!

Anon said:omg fran i haven’t watched/read bnha but still solely bc of your art i am IN LOVE with kirishima. he’s such a pure being I feel like crying every time i see him??? like i just watched the first opening of the anime and you bet i watched the 5 seconds kirishima gets over and over. like all the bnha kids seem great. i am somehow extremely motivated to read bnha now thanks to your art. BUT OH MY GOD KIRISHIMA I LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHAT EVEN

You picked the best fave you could ever pick, anon!!! Kirishima is the BESTEST boy, purest and brightest and energetic and actual sunshine and also super strong and resilient and kind of an ass now and again but in a good way he’s GREAT I’m IN LOVE with him good job your intuition is perfect

Anon said:THE MER AU WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER I LOVE SHARK KIRISHIMA AND THE TAGS ALL GAVE ME LIFE

GLAD YOU LIKED IT OMG!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love all your art, but especially all your self indulgent stuff bc first off HELLS YEAH DO THE STUFF THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY and another is it feels like self indulgent stuff for me but I’m not the one making the thing… So like… It’s Good™ BUT YEAH ANYWAYS I LOVE YOUR ART AND YOU AND YOUR ART MAKES ME HAPPY TBH I HOPE YOU’RE HAVING A LOVELY DAY

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH also this is super nice to know because sometimes being self-indulgent is all I can manage to do haha r i p but at least now I’ll know you, for one, will like it!!! That’s nice!!!!!!

Anon said:If you were ever bored and wanted to do more of your mershark au thing I wouldn’t be mad at all ! 😝 your art is so cute and easily recognizable and I really enjoy it! Stay beautiful lovely Fran!

!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I really, really think I will!!!!!!!! :D

Anon said:I bet if denki tried to do the “if i jump at ______ they will most certainly catch me” with bakugou, bakugou would just let him fall

Oh my god no Bakugou’s reflexes and instincts are too fast and automatic the actual reaction at seeing someone run and jump at him would be without thinking trying to explodo-kill them don’t jump at him Kaminariiiii

Anon said: What to you think of a school dance bnha concept thing???

I read a bakushima about it once and I DIED so actually A++++ great perfect amazing concept I love it

Anon said:I gotta know,what do you think of the “Dabi is Todoroki Shouto’s brother” theory? i personally feel like that 1’s the most likely theory to become a legit thing but im curious

I talked about this on my main just the other day!! And added something about it earlier through another ask! But generally I think it’s believable, and I wouldn’t mind it being true :D

Anon said:But, what are your feelings about this chapters? And Kirishima? God, I love him even more and want him to be happy, but Im also dying to know what happened to him in his past!!

I CRIED I love that boy so much I swear it’s getting ridiculous I’m so so proud of him and how far he’s come and I just want him to be happy??? I do want to know his past tho!!! I’ve just been asking for this for, like, eight months!! I hope next one will be the one I’ll finally learn about my child tbh ;–;

Anon said:Fran you should totally do bnha and haikyuu calendars

………………..boi that sounds like a lot of work, anon. Like, it’s an interesting idea, but also my lazy ass is telling me no way no what the heck go to sleep instead r i p

Anon said:Have you ever thought of an eraser mic fusion?

I’ve drawn it already!!

Anon said:fran i?? i love the way you draw smiles?? idk i was just going through your art and i realized that holy SHIT i really love the way you draw smiles. like each smile is different and has its own specialty. esp bakugo’s smile I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HIS SMILE!! like usually it’s not really noticeable but then there’s that slight quirk of his mouth (see what i did there?) and it’s so perfect. idk dude i just REALLY LOVE THE WAY YOU DRAW SMILES

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE ASK I DON’T KNOW HOW TO ANSWER HELP ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you????? so much??????? I’m glad you like them cause honestly I love drawing people smiling and laughing, it makes my heart smile too~

Anon said:Theres a bnhaStuck blog in the works ;)

That’s? Nice! I guess!! I hope whoever’s working on it will have fun with it!!

Anon said:Fran this last BNHA chapter hurt so bad. And then I saw your mer-Kiri and it cheered me up!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m glad I could cheer you up cause honestly I felt that pain a whole damn lot too ;A; let’s hope Kiri won’t have to suffer much more in this arc #sob

Anon said:im crying fran, my hard bby kiri in the latest chap,,, my baby boi, i know that i wanted to know more abt him but,, keep my baby safe pls oh goodness gracious… (and as usual ur bootiful art keeps me alive)

I mean nearly all the character arcs we got are damn sad so it was obvious Kiri’s was going to be too, but still ;A; don’t make him suffer too bad Hori I beg u ;A;

Anon said:*takes deep breath* I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING QUALITY ART OF MY FAVOURITE SHIPS YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING PERSON AND YOUR ART IS VERY PRETTY AND I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR EXISTING IN GENERAL BYe

THANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:!!!!!!FRAN!!!!!! YOUR MER!KIRI AU!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D I’m glad you enjoy it!!!!!! 

Anon said:I love your work 😍. You are the only one who makes comics About my favourite ships. I check your web everyday If you post something new. My fav ships are I.waoi, bok.uroo and bak.ushima. Love your work 🙂

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh thank you!!!! holy smokes!!!!!

Anon said:Do you have an OC for Boku no Hero Academy?

The closest things to bnha ocs I have are the fusions, right now, but there’s a couple of asks in my inbox about a bkkr kid… soon……..

Anon said:Quick question, I want to read haikyuu, I’ve watched the anime already and I was wondering how close the anime follows the manga, like how bnha is basically identical, is it the same? Or is there a bit of difference *^*

I’m SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER - I bet you already found your answer elsewhere, but anyway the anime is pretty much exactly the same as the manga!!

Anon said:Back on the topic of hq!!! I find it funny how people ask about bok.uroo so much as if you dont like them anymore when they’re literally still your header, like if you didn’t care for them they’d think you’d change it to bakushima or something

I’ve literally thought about changing my header so often but then I look at it and I’m like….. my kids………… I can’t do this………………. not yet…………………. same for my icon tbh haha I love them too much rip

Anon said:Okay but what if Kirishima makes a really stupid pun and Bakugou just turns away with a curse and he’s just covering his mouth and quietly giggling into his hand because even he can’t believe he found that funny, and that is SHAMEFUL. And Sero in the distance is just looking at him, all disappointed. Quietly judging the fact that Kirishima and Bakugou are practically meant for one another.

You wanna know the best thing the absolute best thing? My very first bnha comic was something eerily similar to the first part of this ask! Only Bakugou was the one to accidentally make a pun - I’d link it but honestly my style was ridiculous back then so not happening, just know that I’m 100% sure that post is the reason why I keep on drawing bnha comics about puns, my very first post set the path for all the others to come hah a curse I don’t actually mind

Anon said:are you planning on starting another series? like the bokuroteru tattoo shop au you did (it was real dandy and rad) it was what made me find your blog, so i was wondering if you have any future plans for anything similar. i really like your blog lots, i hope you have a nice day!

Right now I don’t actually have any idea orderly enought to make a proper series out of it, rip - maybe in the future, tho! That one comic was fun to make, after all!! And thank you!!!!!!!!

Anon said:IM HARDCORE IN LOVE WITH TODOSHIMA THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR RUINING MY LIFE❤️❤️

I’M GLAD YOU LIKED HIM OH M Y GODS!!!!

[monismochi]

tagged by @btsaudge check in tag

(I have no idea how I somehow got put into your list of people to tag in this (don't tell me how I know it was probably just random and you thought I'd actuallt do it.) BUT IM HONORED

1. Why did you choose your url? It was a play on words because I was hoping to dream a new dream and jhope had started me on that path of dreaming a new dream.

2. Any side blogs? If you have them name, them and why you have them? Yes. @jhopetodream. I have way too many and all but my main are inactive but that ones still a secret 😘

3. How long have you been on tumblr? With this blog it'll be a year come end of July. I think I made my first one in 2011-2012...?? But have been active on the site since probably 2014

4. Do you have a queue tag? Nope. First because I couldn't figure out how people did it 😂 I'm an idiot. I've since learned but now I just don't have one as I don't see the use for it personally???

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

So that I didn't annoy people with my very quickly snowballing hyperfixation, and because I WANTED TO MEET ARMY AND AN ARMY URL MADE THAT EASY also I just really like being able to have all my bts stuff in one cozy place for me to look at and ooh and aww over ☺☺

6. Why did you choose your icon?

Literally can change by the day. If I see a header or photo that just gives me warm fuzzies or feels like a descriptor to me as a person on that day. I just go with it. (plus so many talented people make so many talented things its hard to stick with one 🤐🤐)

7. Why did you choose your header?

AGAIN. SO MANY TALENTED GIFFERS 😭😭

8. What’s your post with the most notes?

I'm not a creator on this space. Just here for the love and the mush and the ☺☺☺

9. How many mutuals do you have?

No idea.. there's 6-10 people that I scream with pretty often though

10. How many followers do you have?

I don't keep track of that on any of my accounts. I found it just put pressure on me by always being either too many or too little for me to just be myself.

11. How many people do you follow?

244. But I think a lot of them are from 2019 and I haven't done an inactive cleanse in awhile

12. Have you ever made a shitpost? I don't know what this is defined as???

Ok so the Wikipedia definition says they're basically spam posts or posts to create reactions or derail discussions without effort. And like... no??? I don't see the joy in that???

13. How often do you use tumblr each day? Multiple times. It's usually between tumblr, Instagram, and weverse/vlive on check

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won?

No??? Not that I'm aware of. I tend to just stay away from people who don't like me/want to fight me... or ask them why they want to fight me and try to understand where the misunderstanding happened.. and if they're just angry people I revert to my first point ^^

15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? I don't feel a need to reblog them.

16. Do you like tag games? Yes! Though I can tend to be bad about completing them. I love all my mooootts thinking about me 🥰🥰

17. Do you like ask games?

Yeah. I love sharing my opinions and talking about things about my passions and life!!

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

All of them??? Literally all my moots are like the sweetest humans, and so many create the most amazing things (Y'ALL KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND I WILL FIGHT YOU. LITERALLY YOU PUT SO MUCH WORK INTO YOUR STUFF AND THOUGH SOME OF YOU GET A LOT OF INTERACTIONS IT'LL NEVER BE ENOUGH AS Y'ALL DESERVE THE WORLD)

19. Do I have a crush on a mutual?

Google search definition says "a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable "

And idk how brief it is.. but I have a few sisterwives that I'm not even lowkey obsessed with and please yall are adorable and hilarious and OH MY GOD NEVER CHANGE UNLESS IT'S TO BE ALL THOSE THINGS BUT IN A BIGGER BOLDER FONT.

I cant go a day without yall 🥺 thanks for helping me be the best me by constantly being the best you around me 😭💚💚💜💜😚😚🥰

20. Tags?

@oreomonsterhunter @tabsteen @taetaespeaches @eternallybulletproofbts @taechnological

I'm always intrigued about people in these!!!

[survivor-of-removal]

Dark Seeker's history summer/ early autum

There’s not much point doing this blog if i don’t tell you everything thats happened so far. It was 2013 i discovered creepypasta. It was an innocent enough mistake. i spelled a word wrong... yes all my pain and suffering was caused by a fucking spelling mistake. Maybe i shouldn't of hated on that miserable sarcastic teaching assistant that tortured me every Wednesday before swimming class. Maybe my lazy ass should've paid attention.

Anyway it was me looking for a thrill. You know, a scary game to scare the shit out of myself. So i typed in "scaryest game on the internet". Despite the agony its almost funny to think that such an innocent mistake would ruin my life. The "word" scaryest brought me to the more sinister games. Im guessing it was like a deep web link or something similar because it brought me to the dodgy games. Like for an example it brought me to a game, can't even remember what its called. i couldn't find it again even after a long deep search. It had this image on it:

(smile Jeff)

i played the game. i didn't understand it very much. i reversed the image search, brought me to "smile Jeff" a combination of two images, a recreation of the real smile dog picture and the original Jeff the killer song. For some odd reason smile dog didn't interest me at first. The picture was creepy for sure but the name Jeff the killer seemed more interesting. Stupidly enough i did some research on Jeff the killer. the worst mistake of my life. i read a story named "go to sleep" yep thats right, the original Jeff the killer story, the one that tells how he became the way he is. its harder to find nowadays. The part when Jeff carved a smile in his face and burnt off his eyelids shocked me. baring in mind i was only in my early 11 years of age. i wasn't supposed to read that stuff. i remember shaking. literally shaking. i was genuinely shocked, scared. It scarred me but for some odd reason it wasn't enough. i waited three days telling everyone "i read this terrifying story" that was until i finished primary school which was after 3 days. The whole summer holidays was in front of me as well as a new secondary school. It was like everything was set up to fail. That summer i looked deeper and deeper staying up late looking at more creepypastas. Jeff was always my favourite. None of the others did it for me like he did. when i went on holiday to jersey the hotel there had about 5 acres of grounds. It had a forest, fields, and a really large patio area (like really large) where the wine cellar was and where they grew herbs and everything. The best part (at the time) was that it was always empty. The only part that really ever got used was the pool area. the other areas during the later afternoon where always empty. It had different layers and everything with a well and small little cottages, some of the places in the grounds were so rural it felt like a country village. and of course in the evening everything was empty. By then i had discovered a new favorite creepy pasta: the Rake. i used to go rake hunting in the woods next to the manor/hotel. i used to have great fun scaring the crap out of myself. now for those out there who are big into creepypasta stuff. you'll know that there's another one, a big one, one that usually sits next to the rake in terms of myths and fandom. Yes thats right: the Slender man.

this one made me almost forget all the others. From a first glance, one glance thats all it took: i was engrossed. For the next day i didn't go out exploring. i stayed in reading about him, everything i could spend hours reading stories, doing "research". The next time i went out something felt very off and as i walked around i felt like i was being watched. i shrugged it off as paranoia but returned to my families room soon after because it just felt too bad. On the final day of the holiday me and my family took a hike in the area near the ferry port. The whole thing felt weird. The fenced off woods intrigued me. something drew me closer. By now i was already playing the mass of slender man games on the app store.

When i got home it was non-stop slender man, short films, stories not even on creepypasta, stories on creepypasta and looking at pictures, videos, everything i could get my thumbs on. i thought it wasn't real. Some of you may scoff at this. Most people today "know" he isn't real. Every fucking website: "oh he was created on the something awful forums, na na na"

i wanted to believe in it, i wanted to think it was all real. It would be exiting, if i was stalked it would make my life a fun adventure. The stupid innocent ignorance of a fucking 11 year old. That was when he appeared in my dream. i cant remember the dream anymore, i have a few visions. One was an empty mossy swimming pool surrounded by thick dark woods, and he was standing in the entrance to the forest. i woke up. i wasn't scared, i was almost exited, but something suppressed that feeling almost. i cant describe it, it was a feeling of difference, the whole room didn't seem right like something was off, horribly off. i was in my room, but i wasn't. i got to sleep eventually. But had another dream. i was in a field, woods surrounding it with overgrown brown grass, the sky was blue and it was sunny, it was sweet. There were other people if i remember rightly but ill never forget the tree in the middle of the field. i went up to it and the best way to describe it is that on the tree, a suit and tie were carved on in the right place like the tree would come alive any moment. My dad woke me up. today we were going to some boats race thing. Hundreds of people were going to be there. i can remember telling my dad i had a bad dream but didn't tell him what it was. he by now knew of my creepy pasta addiction. Luckily, or at least lucky at the time, right next to the massive field next to the river there was a large dark forest. i played around in there. i was looking for him of course. surprisingly the forest felt calm.

The day was going fine. If i remember they had a BBQ on the main field anyway, or they were selling hot dogs or something. Anyway, the day was good. That was until i had to go to an aunts' birthday party. Some people got drunk if i remember rightly and everyone was "partying" a little too hard for middle-aged people. i spent most of the night outside in the pub garden staring into the dark trees thinking about slender man. i told my grandma and one of my aunts about slenderman, and they couldn't stop laughing. i was slightly annoyed by this i dont know why.

By the way if you're wondering how i can remember all this, which if sure you are it's because i have a high functioning form of autism. no I’m not a retard, the opposite in fact, i have a high IQ but do find it hard in social situations and other minor things like that. i can remember when i was 6 for goodnes’s sake. i have a good memory, its never been bad, it's been blurry at times, usually when im... when is... yeah

but anyway i was happy to go home, it had been a long day. as we were driving home i had the sudden urge to look out the window, and there he was, standing there on the pavement. i had never been more shocked in my life, but the thing i remember is confusion. i dont know why but i was more surprised than scared.

The rest of the summer was okay i guess, a lot of homework that my new secondary had set (how brutal is that, i hadn't even attended a day at the school, and they gave summer homework) and of course long nights looking at slender man stories. One i remember well is "the rocking chair" i cant find it again but it was about a rocking chair on a campsite and whoever sat in it at night would encounter slender man. i dont know why i remember that one. i was fully obsessed reading creepiest one after the other. By now they were regular stories, i wasn't scared, i was reading stories at 11 that are supposed to frighten fucking adults. i look back on it now. Maybe i didn't realize what i was doing but now i know. i was harming myself: psychologically.

School began. Or should i say hell began. The academy i attended was brutal, vicious. no one liked me. i jumped from being fairly popular in primary (people liked me because i was quirky) to being the laughingstock and the loser of not just the class, not just my year group. no we are talking about the whole fucking school. for goodnes’s sake, pupils that came from my primary didn't even like me anymore. a girl i danced with in the school disco sort of thing didn't even like me, they turned me away, i was an embarrassment. i tried to fit in but i couldn't. i tried to joke, i tried to laugh, i tried to join in conversations, but they would all turn me down as a "gay weirdo". Its painful looking back on it. i was so confused at the time. i knew no one, not the teachers, all my friends were gone and the ones that did go to the same school turned me away too engrossed in their new friends. i would just sit there at break and read creepypastas in the corner. It was an escape from hell. By now i started getting slender sickness, nose bleeds, coughing fits, nausea, ringing in my ears. and i shadow would follow me everywhere, a tall wispy dark shadow with long arms that would stand in the corner of the recreation ground at break and just watch me disappearing each time a looked directly at it. it would follow me home, i would see it outside, in town. i wanted answers. i knew it was slender man, i knew he was after me. i had the sickness, the obsession, i saw him, i got detentions all the time. i couldn't concentrate in class. Either i tried to make conversation with the boy next to me, he seemed fairly... different... so i trusted him. he didn't make fun of me like the others. By now my new nickname was weirdo. i didn't choose the nickname. i minded my own business. The first week i tried to make friends went so wrong i just sat in the corner at breaks and minded my own business, sometimes silently crying about the lesson beforehand when someone had humiliated me or picked on me for no reason. But still they came up to me and made fun of me then. i remember i had two spots i would hide. There was a pathway that went off the main recreation space up to a fire exit, i would sit by the fire exit door away from everyone watched everyone have fun, laughing, joking, groups of kids like me walking around with their friends. i had no one. no one but my stupid creepypastas. i had imaginary friends too. Tommy, cal, they were all i had, and they weren't even fucking real. My other place was behind the fence. There was a gate next to the football pitches that entered a small area behind a wooden fence. i was the only person who ever went there. after all who else would go behind some tall wooden fences into that small isolated space. i wouldn't eat lunch, the cafeteria was a spot for bullying. no one would let me sit down. i began to become really skinny. But i felt better behind a wooden fence where no one could find me than eating. At this point my obsession with slender man took over everything. in school any opportune to write about something, draw something, anything optional, it would always be about slender man. My life was breaking down. Detentions every day. i almost liked them. It was stop me from going outside. i think the teachers knew: they would send me out early to socialize. Socialize with whom? i had no friends. i only had enemies. People wouldn't let me sit down. they would shout at me tell me to fuck off. If i walked past people they would drop the "gay" insult or call me names. i never understood why. i didn't do anything. in sports, i was always the last to get picked. in the end i just refused to play, every sports lesson just made me feel horrible inside. i would sit in the corner and do nothing. i dont suppose it helped but its not like anyone would pass the ball or anything. they would call me a girl because i had long hair. It wasn't even that long. It was more of an emo fringe than anything but still, it pissed me off, and they liked that. People liked my reaction.

(End of part 1)

[a425app]

Interview 02

How are you?

Umm im pretty good, pretty tired, had two nights that I stayed up but I slept last night, glad its friday

What were you doing?

I was finishing my paperwork for blackfish gallery. I was nominating to get into the blackfish gallery this summer. Had to make a CV last minute and working on jens stuff (A321)

What is your name?

Sohaina martitia

What is your age?

24

What gender do you identify as?

Female

What have you done today so far?

I just got up and showered and i was supposed to work on stuff but i just watched youtube and then came to class.

What are the things that have been on your mind today?

What's been the most enjoyable part of you of your day so far?

I went to get a boba smoothie. That has been the best part of my day cause I haven't been there in awhile and i like that place.

Is there something your looking forward too?

I am looking forward to a lot of things but I am very nervous about them. I am looking forward to them because they are great opportunities. Also looking forward to my family coming up because I am walking. That's all i can think of right now.

What is the most important thing that matters to you at the moment?

Graduating and surviving and surviving this term because it been crazy. Graduating and getting stuff together before graduating but i am not too concerned about getting a job right out of the gat.

Do you work? If so how many hours a week and what sort of job is it? / do you work on site or at home (or alternate location)

No

What are some things you like to do on the weekends?

I really like to read fanfiction, watch youtube, i dont really like going out alot so i stay home alot, so that been my life the last couple months. So ya those are the things i like to do.

Is there something you do on the weekend that you don't do during the week?

Mostly cleaning honestly because during the week because thats the only time I have to do it.

What is your living situation like?

I live with my roommate right now. Shes my bestfriend we moved out here together.  Two bedroom apartment. I have been slacking so its kinda dirty. Somes me and my roommate dont actually get time to talk to each other because of our schedules. I would love to change that actually eventually.

Is your living space organized to help you accomplish your tasks or goals, whatever they may be?

Its organized but probably not to the best of its potential. I can find things  where they are but sometimes I can’t find things.  I would say its like midway.

If so, what does that look like to you?

If not do you wish it was?

What kinds of chores did you do during childhood/teenage years?I did alot because my mom is a single mom and she was a fulltime intructor at our community college. So when we came home from school there would be all these chores to do. I had to sweep and mop everyday. My mom and grandma really like a clean space because thats how they grew up. It was never spotless but as long as we did our chores it was ok. Taking out the trash, feeding the dogs, hanging the clothes on the lines, pulling the clothes off lines, fixing the couch, vacuuming the carpet, watering plants.

From child to teenager? Ya

Would you say you actively seek out new things to try?

I do try to seek them out it's just a matter of of going through with it. I do look for things but its like ‘do i have time to go and do it?’ I would say i do look for new opportunities, its just do i go though with them?

What are some of your goals for your daily life?

I really want to get healthier and i want to establish a more active lifestyle and a better diet. So thats been the goal for a long time o feel like cuz it hard especially as a student. You have a lot of stuff to do and no time to do it. That and also maintaining a cleaner environment cuz my room is quick to get messy, it gets disorganized easily and then i have to push it off. So i think like establishing habits that create a healthier environment for me and my body. So thats like my daily goal that i would like to accomplish.

What are some of your goals in general?

Career wise I really  want to try working at a small to medium studio that focuses on movie-making or like film. I want to try that environment. Maybe even get an internship. I wanna find a place where I want to work (like do research for where/companies I would like to work at)

What are some things that make you feel proud of yourself?

When people like the work that I do cuz i dont like the work i do a lot so it makes me proud when other people like it.

What activities give you the most satisfaction?

Cleaning, cuz it  feels nice to have it all finished afterwords. Having the kitchen all clean and stuff, that really satisfying for me. Also finishing a project and the product at the end is really satisfying. Maybe finishing a book.

What sort of things do you to relieve stress?

Mostly I watch lik shows or lay in bed reading fanfiction. Thats what i find myself doing the most. It really takes you out of daily life mindset, like surfing the internet or whatever. Its just very therapeutic

What is something you wish you had more time to do?

Work on my own art. I feel like i could probably make time to do that but its just really hard to do that. I feel like focusing more on learning the skills that I want to do. I have a lot of things on my list.

What kinds of things take up most of your time?

I think cleaning is a big one because sometime i leave things to the point where i need to clean it right now and at that point it takes a long time too clean it. That and schoolwork.

How do you feel after you have completed a task?

How do you reward yourself?

Freetime and doing the things I like , thats my main reward. And also food. I will tell myself that if I like stay up long enough to finish this work then i can go get mcDonalds or something. It probably not the best thing to do but its whats working for me right now.

How often do you successfully use these rewards to motivate yourself?

How much time do you take just for yourself?

I think I take alot of time for myself, especially since i don't like really going out and doing stuff outside of what i am doing now which is school. No time no energy

What are the most frustrating aspects of your daily activities/ day?

I am mostly just frustrated with myself when i don't utilize my time in a way i know i probably could have. Which is why i am such a procrastinator and leave thing to the last minute which is a big frustration. So i think my frustration is mostly myself

Time management and motivation.

What time of day do you tend to do your work/chores/ homework?

Do you feel like you have a good balance between work and personal life?

No. Like i was saying I dont do much. I am going to have to say no because i am a procrastinator so a balance is needed. I need that in my life.

How consistent is your schedule?

The only consistent thing is class time. Feels like i dont have a consistant order of things. Dont feelm consistant at all. Part of what contributes to procrastination

Can you describe a typical day for you from the time you wake up to the time you go to bed?

What time of day do you feel the most alert/happy

At night.

When does night start for you?

Evening hours around 5 and beyond. I like to stay up late and feel the most awake at night uless i am really tired

What do you think having a routine means?

Feel like routine are habits and consistency.

What are somethings you do everyday and every week?

Youtube

Do you have a daily/weekly routine(s) If so, What are some of your daily/weekly routines?

What tools do you use to plan or remind yourself of activities or a routine if any?

Mostly google calendar, make lists of things i need to do.

What are the things you put in your calendar?

Mostly big dates that include other people like my mom coming up for graduation or if i am going to meet up with someone. Really important dates that i cant forget, or even movie release dates that i really want to see. Big, big stuff that i have to remember

Do you ever keep track of what you have done during the day?

Only when i ave a list of things i have to do like homework. Dont keep track of things like if i have gone to the store

Do you think having a daily routine would/does benefit you? Why or why not?

I think so. I want a routine but its just finding a way to do it...just establishing habits that create a routine, like maybe getting up at a certain time and going to bed at a certain time. I feel like it would add a stability

Have you done any research / read articles about having a routine?

Definitely, like i watch videos. I have and i have tried some of them

How often would you say you search for things involving lifestyle: blogs, articles, magazines etc.

At least once a month, sometime it just coomes up in my f=feeed and i go down the rabbit hole

Would you be interesting in learning how to best establish and stick to a routine?

Yes, i would love that, that would be helpful

What would that look like to you?

I think it could be a list of things to do that help get you to your goal. Sometime i forget to do things because it's not a habit

Do you use technology for planning and/or reminders? If so, what are your favorite tools/programs.

I try to  but has trouble investing the time to put stuff in the app or bullet journal and maintain. Its hard to keep up with it. Time and laziness

Why are those your favorite?

What are some of your favorite apps to use? Why those? How do you use them? How often do you use them?

Mostly instagram, youtube, calculator, spotify, netflix, hulu, dont really use my phone for other things besides those

If you could make a app for keeping track of a routine what would be some of the features you would want?

Customizable tasks and library of tasks, color coordinator, ability to print out a schedule, notifications to remind you.

Section for goals?

Yeah, I think that would be helpful, portion for short term and long term goals, ability to set aside time to work toward long term goals as well.

Have you ever failed to stick to a routine?

Yes,

If so, why do you think that was?

Forgetting and not wanting to do what i am notified to do, problems with motivation and willpower. Reward system to get motivation.

Do you have any medical conditions that you think might affect your ability to stick to a regular schedule or routine?

Do you think your profession has an impact on your routine?

To what degree do you think other people impact your routine?

At the moment not really that much.

Would you be more likely to do something if someone was holding you accountable?

Yeah,

If so what does that accountability look like?

If we came back in any number of  years to have this conversation again, what would you like to be different?

I would like to have a routine.

More control over my life

Self control

Be more motivated

Stable financially

Is there anything I’ve missed that you would like to tell me?

No

Any questions?

[zuretha-metal]

Into the Bottomless Pit Once Again

I had a fairly decent Summer, minus the whole kidney infection thing. Band camp went great. First week of classes was going fine. But I got overdrawn bc of a check from my band fees that I wasn't aware hadn't gone through. So I asked for like 20 bucks to cover the charge the bank slapped on there and proceeded to get scolded and berated about my irresponsible decisions and how I clearly can't take care of myself at all. I've literally been living on my own for like, 2 weeks. I was never taught any of this. I've never had to keep track of a fucking budget before. And my refund wont go in for another week. Anyoo, my parents started talking about my job- which they cant rehire me for bc of funding, despite me being promised a full-time position if I worked through my work-study. So I don't have work study. I don't have a job, and that makes me a failure. They proceeded to tell me I shouldnt have trusted my boss, I need to search for a job (bc apparently me putting in 10 apps the day I found out I might not be rehired (2 and a half fucking weeks ago) and having 2 interviews next week implies that i "am not trying hard enough"), and then they asked me about what I bought. What did I spend my money on? I bought groceries. Food to live off of. Notebooks for class. A journal, bc beth says I should vent. A window railing to hang my clothes to dry on. I didnt buy anything uneccessary except for a 4 pack of wine coolers to celebrate move in day. For me and my roommate. That's it. And they act like i'm boohooin "oh pay my bills help i'm in dire straits" like bitch i just need 20 bucks so i'm not in the negative. I get paid in four days and my refund drops in like a week. Then I can pay all my bills. I dont need anything but that. And you guys owe me 330 dollars still, so 20 bucks aint a lot. And this is the first time i've straight up asked for money in like, 5 years. Ever since i got a job i have been paying all my own stuff outside of actually paying rent to live in the house. I pay gas when someone takes me somewhere, I pay my own phone line, I pay club fees, t shirt fees, my own graduation, hell- I paid for my sister to go to the Show-Me's this year bc they took money without asking from me and then I didn't get to fucking go bc I had a fever of 102. I've given them enough money to nearly cover both of my prom dresses that they bitched about. I gave them 800 dollars last summer, 430 this summer. At least 200 both summers before that and while I was still in high school my father took 300 dollars from me bc he didnt think i cared. So yeah, 20 bucks. That's all I needed. Thanks for the lecture, though.

I felt like shit after that phone call this morning and was down to legit stay home, but I was filled with rage. Fuck her. If she thinks she's gonna ruin my day, fuck her. I'm gonna go to classes. That'll fuckin show her! And so I went to class and came home. I sat on the couch, talked to my S.O. And now I'm avoiding my responsibilities bc depression has grabbed me tight and reminded me of this morning. So here I am, needing to do dishes, needing to do laundry, shirking off friends (I have been talking about this rager for the music department for two weeks and thinking of getting up and doing something is making me cry), and blogging bc I feel hurt and like a failure. And I don't even have any alcohol to drown in. Fuck adulting.

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Hii love!! How are you?? Hope you had a great time at yesterday's dinner. Yes, i still have a month of exams. And a lot of essays and assigments that i dont want to do. But hopefully i'll be free soon. Nop. I didnt see that. Which one was it? Crying in the club? I remember seeing that song in the track list at the beginning of the tour. But i havent seen anything else. (1)

Hi, love!! Finally I get to answer you. I’ll try to make it “short”, jajja, but I talk too much, so, no promises here, jajjaja.Yeah, we had a good time. We bought some pizzas 🍕 (lol, Honey 🍯 senses when I’m writing you, and he comes to lay on my 😌). I told them if they wanted to watch Dunkirk, they told me they rather no, jajajaj. But, well 🤷🏻‍♀️, their lost. A day more, is a day less. Soon you’ll be free, and will forget about the stress.Oh, I think it’s that song, yes. I didn’t knew he was covering it on his tour. He also sang a Sting one, too. 😩😩 I didn’t know it, what a fake fan 😅.

Yes. I think i started wearing them when i was 7. I’ve been wearing glasses for more than half of my life now. They are part of me and people dont recognise me without them. Kind of sad if you ask me. But it is what it is. Is the surgery that expensive? I havent even looked that up bcs getting surgery it’s just a dream at this moment, i dont need reality to discourage me (2)

Well, if it’s of some relief, I’ve wearing them for almost three years, only, and even my family see something weird in my face when I don’t have them on, so 🤷🏻‍♀️. Well, when my mom look it up, it was around 3000€. But I think my friend told me last year that it was around 1800€, I think. So, yes, it’s very expensive, but all the people I know who have had it are very happy with it.

Yes. I know. I get that it’s easier to give them the ipad and all of that, but i dont think that’s really good for them mainly bcs they dont get the attention they need. But well, parenting is something very personal, and technology also has its perks. Maybe nowadays kids learn in a different way, but it’s still learning. I guess it’s the same as when Game Boy and so came out. That was supposed to “pervert” us all, but i think we ended up being just fine. Mostly. (3)

Oh, yeah, well used, technology is the best. But sometimes parents just give their children their phones so they don’t bother them, and that’s not good for kids. Like when they’re waiting at the doctor. I actually hear a psychologist saying that that teaches kids that to be relaxed they need a phone. And it’s a way to conditioning them. Like when a dog does something well and you give it a treat. And then the dog does that thing, so you have to give it another treat. But, yes, like you said, parenting is something very personal, and I think it parents reflects what they had/hadn’t from their parents on their kids.

Ohh! I havent thought about that. Yes yes. I hope they are not recognisable then. Do you know if there'a any project for Nialls show? Like the rainbow flag they did for Fire Away in Amsterdam (was it Amsterdam?). I havent heard about one. JAJAJAJAJA. Of course buying a bigger house is the easy option. Of course😂. I’d take a pic of the door, but then i dont know how i would send it?? An anti or a het? Please no. Never. I have eyes and i know how to use them. And so does she (4)

Oh, I haven’t looked for projects yet. I always remember to look it up when I’m driving, bc is when I’m hearing Niall’s album, lol, but then I get home or work and I forget 🙄. I’ll look it up, and let you know. I’ve thought on bringing those big balloons that have a cord at one end? (I’ll try to find a pic, so you see them) and throw them to the crowd at some point and people can play hitting them, you know (we did that at my sister wedding and we had a lot of fun, I think here it would be funnier). But I’ll see. I’m very shy, so, even if I bring them, I’ll probably keep them in my bag, lmao.I think you can submit pics on anon. Just log off, search my blog, and submit it. You have to put an email, that can be anónimo@anonimo.com, jajja.

Your dad also knows their names? My parents barely know that One Direction exist. They only remember it as the opposite to good music. “This is music, not like that direction you like"😤😒 Jajajajajaja. Dont be so hard on you all. I’m sure there will be a lot of people of your age. You are not old!! (Yes, they are young babies. But mostly, they are lucky babies. Only 16 and already living their best life). (5)

Well, it would be too hard for my family to not know them, lol. All the people that has any contact with me, knows that I like them, lmao. My dad doesn’t like English music in general, so he isn’t a big fan (of me, listening their music 24/7, oops). Well, I’ll let you know after the concert, jajajajaj, of how much old people I see. The good thing is that it’s a small crowd, so less people judging 😅. And yes, they’re very lucky!! but if they can, good for them. I got to see Andy&Lucas when I was 16, 🤣🤣🤣🤣, almost the same, jajaja.

Only two weeks!! It’s around the corner!!! 😱😱😱😱😱 Yes. I should have bought a ticket for myself. But i’m not that sad. I’ll go another time. And also, the timing of the concert id disastrous because i start exams that week and going there + the show would mean 2 days less to study. And less time to study = more stress and crying. I’ve resigned myself to the idea. Next time. (6)

Yeah, I always look for the good point on everything too,jajaja. Also, that you have to see them next time they come, is the perfect excuse for them to come back again,jajajajaj. But you’re right. And it’s not just those two days you wouldn’t study. It’s the week before and after, thinking about the concert and getting distracted. Thinks come the way they do for a reason. So just think that studios are first. 🤷🏻‍♀️.

He tried to catch a duck? 😂😂😂 Nooo. Videos for cats? What are those? I know about cats’ videos (i love them. They are so cute), but not about videos for cats. What do they show? Oh, dont worry!! Notifications dont bother me. They dont make any sound. They are just there. And i only get one, no matter how many posts you reblog. (7)

Yes!! Cats are so funny. I laugh so much with them. If you search on YouTube “videos para Gatos” you’ll a lot, jajajaja. They’re just a cartoon mouse running and hiding, and cats try to catch it. Boring for humans, funny for cats.Ah, that’s good then,jajaja, because I was afraid you’d get 1837453 notfs, jajajaja.

Aaaargh. I’m trying to think something because I dont want to give you my name. It’s nothing personal. I swear. I’m just a very private person. That’s why i dont have SM and that stuff. But also, i cant think of a nickname bcs i dont have many, and i think my sister follows your blog and if she sees it there, that would be strange😂🤷. I dont knooow. I know names are not a big deal, but. I’m just shy. I’ll think about something and then i’ll tell, if you dont mind. (8)

WHAT??? Your sister follows me?? Oh my god!! This is so weird!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣I hope she isn’t reading this then, so you don’t get discovered. Now more than ever I have to try to put everything under the cut,jajajajja. Don’t worry about the name, that’s why I didn’t want to ask you. I was thinking something like flower anon (I don’t know why I call you flower i my head,jajja), or something like that. Or just smiley anon. I didn’t mean your actual name, of course. I’m very shy like that too (I know, hard to believe), and  I always talk on anon to people. Don’t worry. Ah!! And don’t worry about thinking a name at all. If you’re comfortable with the notifications, keep with it. I just thought that if you were searching in my blog that tag anon, it would be easier for you to have your own tag, with your own things,jejejeje. But whatever you think is better, seriously.

8 months? So young!! She just discovered her hands?😂 Glasses are the first target, but i bet she’s going to go after your hair next. All did was laugh? I would have cried for sure. Omg you are brave! I love kids, but i wouldnt have known what to do. “Well, if you could tell me what is a girl/boy toy” 📢 📢📢📢 Say it louder Soraya!! I love saying remarks like that. Some people get so angry and i’m like ???? Chill and think about what i just said pls, it’s all true.(9)

Aaaawwwww, I was with her today too, she’s so cuteeeee. And yes, she goes for my hair too, but that’s my fault, really, because I tickle her with it, so she just plays with it. And I was with my cousin yesterday too!!! You’d have to see him. He has a “problem” in his brain, so he doesn’t develop normally. Doctors even thought he had autism (I don’t know the correct way to say it in English, bc I think they use a different verb, but you get it) for some time, because he behaved like that. Anyway, he has photographic memory, and also when he learns something, he doesn’t forget (he’s just 4). Well, yesterday, he just taught me in English the weeks days, months of the year, numbers till 20 and the weather. All of that singing it and pointing to his black board (the tv) like he was a teacher. He’s just amazing. He has learn how to read some words all on his own… and he can recognize written words since he was 2. He learn my car plaque before than me… I love him so much. ☺️. (Did I have a point with this story???? I just love to talk about him, sorry, jajaja)Hey, look, I do t usually say good things about me, but I’ll say one. I think I’m good on how I treat people at work. Like I know how to read them, and if I can joke with them or not. And I talk a lot with people, even if I don’t know them,jajaja. Well, when someone says something like that (a toy for a girl; can you make a candy cake, but it’s for a boy so nothing pink, please…) soy la persona más seca que te puedas imaginar 😒 (I don’t know how to say that in English). Like, no, lol, what will it do to him to it something pink? It’s just mean it taste like strawberry 🙄🙄🙄. I can’t I can’t.

Today i did a survey for a friend who is studying to be a teacher, and it was… wrong The aim of the survey was good, but the ways… the first question was “¿Q opinas al respecto de que existan orientaciones sexuales distintas a la heterosexual?” & also “¿como d normal t resulta q un niño juegue con muñecas?”. That’s wrongly put. Like, u are not asking what people thinks about sexuality. U are assuming that hetero is cool, and then u are asking about the nonhetero ones. And that annoyed me. 10

Yeah, that way of asking is wrong. Even more because is a written question, so you can’t catalogue the way the person asked is answering. But I sometimes ask question the wrong way so people shows they true colors, y'know? Like I ask in a way that it looks like I’m thinking the wrong way (gay things are wrong) and when they answer as if I were right… bye. But, again, that can be done in s face to face conversations. That survey was wrong yes, because they didn’t ask how you see that a boy play with a gun (which is worst that playing with a doll or a kitchenette…). But also, who wrote that survey? Your friend? Did you tell them what you thought about the way it was written? Did they listen to you??

Well, I reached the end!! Jajajja, I had to put my iPad to charge. Why do I talk so much??? We have this joke at the shop, with a woman (she’s also my sister neighbor), and she talks a lot A LOT!! So much, that my sister sometimes has to close the shop and walk with her to their flats… jajajaa. Well, I always say: ja! yo la doy conversación. Cuando se cansa de hablar, la saco otro tema!! That’s how much I talk,🤣🤣🤣🤣. I think is because I spend so much time alone at home, without opening my mouth (only to talk to my cats), that when I start talking with someone, I don’t know how to stop,jajajja. But I’ll stop… NOW! Bye!! 😚😚