#and with every month more and more money
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If I tell my psychiatrist how depressed I’ve been this past month she will want to talk to me about it and give me solutions on how to help it but I already know what to do and being told what to do will make me not want to do it that’s totally normal right 
#I need to go outside more#the weather has been interesting#and there’s no mushrooms at all left on earth apparently#I always forget when I have it scheduled because I only see her every six months#She is mostly just a Zoloft dispenser for me#But without fail it happens when I’m stressed about money already and I pay out of pocket#irony#it’s seasonal depression primarily
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Bow problems (+ other nonsense)
#saroart#dead cells#the beheaded#the collector#they just wanted a nice bow#the collector can do a lot of stuff but i don't think he's good at bows#i was drawing a lot of antagonistic beheaded/collector content so i wanted to do some more cute junk#okay a lot is an exaggeration. still#need some guys being buds content sometimes#weird monster guys doing domestic shit is my favorite genre#i got a bonus at holiday time and im tempted to buy a tablet i can use portably#esp because holy fuck i don't know how to draw anymore#but also i just spent stupid money on tickets to live podcasts so i probably shouldn't#unrelated im very upset today because fucking UPS didn't ring my goddamn doorbell and so “”missed me“” and couldnt deliver my specialty meds#why must i get my meds through ups#because the us is a hellscape and i am beholden to my health insurance company#ups who has literally never managed to get a package to this apartment#tbh im stressed as fuck about having to go through this every goddamn month
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Hello Sonic Fandom 💙💥💫
#i have spent the last 4 months of my life learning how to draw these characters and what a time its been#expect much more in the future#being at uni i'm tight on money rn so hopefully i can get ahold of some games to play them myself eventually#thriving off of playthroughs and every other type of content under the sun in the meantime#anyways hello#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#amy rose#amy rose the hedgehog#amy with back quills my beloved#not necessarily sonamy but if you want it to be knock yourself out#glorfy draws#my art
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T'Pring and Stonn from the @startrekswimsuitspecial
#T'Pring#Stonn#T'Pring/Stonn#star trek#tos#st tos#star trek tos#'Ready to go home?'#bea art tag#As the world drags me kicking and screaming into the Depression Month I look into my locket (where I've put Summer for safekeeping)#Anyway. I love T'Pring so much - thinking about her again bc I saw a post that said it would have been more logical for T'Pring#to just have sex with Spock. I disagree!!! Since her goal was not to have sex with or marry Spock. In fact she was fighting#for any way NOT to do that! So it would have been quite illogical indeed!#You the audience who loves Spock might think 'why didn't T'Pring just be pragmatic and have sex with this essential stranger every#seven years for the rest of their lives? It's a win win bc Spock stays alive without having to fight Kirk and T'Pring gets all the money an#power she desires' but you the audience have forgotten the fact that T'Pring's desire is not money or power and is instead a divorce#Rather telling that the 'logical' thing for a woman to do in you the audience's opinion is ''just'' have sex with a man for HIS sake#instead of rejecting him for her own#If you believe T'Pring's actions to be illogical/incomprehensible#perhaps consider whether you are actually thinking about T'Pring and not Spock
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Mickrin
Fifth entry of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series. This one’s straight up embarrassing, like of course the shadow version of Chilchuck and Marcille would get me.
It suddenly grabbed me out of nowhere. What got me thinking about it is this exchange, first comic third panel, because like… Woah. He knows she has a thing for Kabru? Or something. And he has NO FEAR. Like it’s so forward and has 0 pretenses lmao. And then I thought… And oh no. Oh no.


"I can fix him" x "I can make her worse"
Very uptight and strict and rules-following and too self-aggrandizing tbh x will not hesitate to insult you to your face and sleazy and free spirit…. Kuro is involved in an ot3 of sorts in my head and basically they drag her into Situations of various moral standing aka scams or idk going to a club god forbid. I think she needs to relax and get taken down 1 peg maybe, and I think he needs like…….. Someone to teach him what is unhealthy lmao, also remind him to get work benefits, and if they can like get to feel safe and comfy with one another (and god just the road there would be a beautiful trainwreck to watch) they would be gossip besties worsties.
Kabru needs to be the epitome of morals but like, if it’s Mickbell she can lower the bar… Just for him… <3 She can fix him just a little and she’ll be like "wow! Ok I can settle for this amount of upstanding behavior from you Mickbell you get a gold star"
I never expected it ok I read this extra expecting nothing and god knows why I saw him be like "hey u like Kabru right. You’re his babysitter right. Which poor sap is being Kabru’s maid" with 0 fear and her being so casually pissed back at him and idk, how they’re so comfy being not polite with one another but they’re still coworkers-friends despite it… Crazy for how prickly they both are that they manage that much. They bicker and see each other as annoying at best but weirdly dependable and friends despite it all and……….. I am going to grow them in a lab and observe how I can make it work
MICKBELL IS A REBOUND MORE AT 9??? Maybe Rin and Mickbell have a one night stand and then the aftermath dynamic is this….. She probably regrets it. And then it gets more complex and grows into something odd as she becomes hyperaware of him and they have this little complicity thing going on….
I think cuddling with Kuro (who would be more like a platonic protective & soothing presence in his and Rin’s relationship rather than romo) would destress her actually I think she needs and deserves it. Go to a dog cafe bbygirl it’ll fix you. So what I’m saying is the three of them watch a movie and Rin and Mickbell are sitting on Kuro’s laps and everyone is so comfy. Kuro’s legs die halfway through but he’s self-sacrificing it’s fine….. Actually Mick is on his laps Rin’s just nuzzled into his side. There, fixed. I am so weirdly invested in them… They’re funky to think about. Rin seeing Mickbell and Kuro like "you guys are aware that what you two have is fucked up right" and then joining them in the messy dynamic 🤝 Put them in situations. That will be all.

The sheer amount of sass on their own, let alone together…





Make them get drunk together it’ll be glorious


#Dungeon meshi#mickbell tomas#rinsha fana#I’m sorry i see visions in my hot coco mugs#Fumi rambles#Dunmeshi rarepairs#I’ve had these two in the back of my mind for months by now i’m like. Idk if i’ll write them at one point but it’d be neat#Rin needs more love. This does it for me idk. Think of the shenanigans. Someone chasing after Mick and Kuro and they drag her through the#Alleys along. Market-going turned very wrong. Someone said since both Mick and Kuro are pretty touchy feely they’d lean on her &#I think that’s cute#Mickrin#Rinbell is also cute but eh#Everyone needs Kuro tbh he’s just so laidback and good#Kabru notices early and is like. Now what the fresh hell happened while i stopped looking at you guys for 2 secs. Good for u but also huh??#I swear i have actual meta posts coming soon i just have demons to exorcise every so often#If you ask me for another rin ship that isn’t qpr it’d prob be Pattadol. Toshiro too I’ve heard fun ideas for it but Pattadol…#Her little ‘money~’ laugh is weird lol. One common point with Mick?
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I've been... Busy 👀
Trying to get all 4 arcs from season 1 into books!
(not available for sale, these are print proofs. I'm planning a Kickstarter early next year!)
#this is why i havent been posting much#ive been so busy between making episodes and doing Kickstarter prep#theres been a lot more for Kickstarter prep than i had anticipated#i mean. not really.#i knew it was gonna be a lot#but it's takin longer than i thought#cause i always forget how little time i have outside of making comic updates#I'm also thinking $25 a book#and then itd be $30-60 to ship them#so. if youre reading these tags its not an official announcement#but i want to give people ample warning#cause i know $150 is a lot to save up#also for legal reasons#i can not print all the books at once...#i have to go one at a time??#so I'm planning on making it like.. a box every few months#idk#I'm trying to think of thinfs that make it more worthwhile to do it that way#i want ppl to feel like they got their moneys worth idk#but! tbese two books look really good#I get proofs really early so i can go through for typos or color errors asap#so! hopefully I'll have the ghost and Victorian ones done by end kf year#so i can do the Kickstarter in like... jan/feb#i wanna add some scenes to the Victorian one#so. loads of work to do#printing#books#Kickstarter prep#time and time again
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my dad keeps telling me to stop buying halo figures because ill lose interest in half a year like relax bro first of all you underestimate my autism second of all can i not have a little bit of joy in this dull life. and also if i do lose interest i can just sell them again. i know like 5 people who would buy them right now
#LIKE SHUT UPPPPPP#ITS MY MONEY NOT YOURS#im an adult with a job let me spend my money#im not like my brother who keeps buying expensive clothing and new phones and watches every other month#and i earn more than him currently#talk#evil church moments
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i need a job
#^ he looked at a bunch of lolita dresses#maybe j could have One expensive hobby. Once i get my apartment#i was thinking abt maybe spending my bday christmasnmoney.... my papaw gave me 100 for christmas and i got 20 for helping dogsit dozer#so i currently have 120 dollars In my life. technically its like 121.37 or some shit I dont check my bank acct bc it makes me want to vommy#but once the bday money clmes in i might be able to get somethjng nice But it would be more responsible to save it for my apartment But i#have moments of weakness frequently so if i try to save it i may end up Instead making a bunch of small stupid shitty purchases instead of#spending it on something i rly want. you know ...#idk it just doesnt feel right for me to spend my bday/christmas money on something so frivolous Dont yell at me i know it just feels like i#isnt rly my money to spend . sigh#oh its eating me for this. Disclaimer the real reason i need a job is so i can help my family and help pay mortgage and buy groceries and#also save up to move out so that im not being a burden on them anymore and this is a moment of me being irresponsible and wanting to spend#money on myself but thats only in a hypothetical scenario where im fully moved out and also have money leftover After helping my family .#and donating and doing good things . and Then is when id maybe buy myself a little treat every couple of months#okay .
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a strange trend in my favorite characters I realize is that I tend to heavily gravitate toward somewhat obscure, antagonistic forces
#shoutout to the multiple months when I was young when I was obsessed with flatwoman#‘who the fuck is flatwoman’ heh. well. you ever watch the pbs kids show peg + cat?#she appeared in like two episodes and let’s just say. I would’ve died for her as a kid#and yup ok you guessed it this trend continued with my boy pumpkin daddy#what thehell is wrong with that guy and more important question why is he my absolute favorite character of all time#I’m not even talking strictly about PDBC here alright? in that I have full control over him#in ROOTS? oh boy unstoppable force of nature someone Actually euthanize him or something he’s going to commit heinous crimes if left alone#he’s So bizarre mind if I just talk about that before going back to sleep? his morals are all over the place#‘this poor abandoned child. her mother should be ashamed of doing this to her. anyway let’s kidnap her for money’#and then he fucking pretends that he didn’t remember that happening#not that it DIDNT happen but that he just doesn’t remember it??.okay go off king??#at this point I don’t even know if he was lying he might just have Alzheimer’s or something he’s gettin kinda old#also Alzheimer’s is the worst word ever I have to look it up to spell it every time ffs so annoying#also worth mentioning that he almost got himself killed in a pursuit of someone’s money#and then not even a YEAR later he was back at it again trying to scam the SAME people lol GIVE IT A REST#I didn’t type lol this is travesty istg I didn’t type lol there there’s a lol ghost on the loose#he needs to be put down or something#and why the hell is he actually one of the nicest parents like huh?..?man what??#yeah this is my little science experiment I made solely for money. i love her she’s beautiful she’s awesome#my brother in Christ pick a side are you horrible or not#ok also wait that reminds me. it was unintentionally implied that he wasn’t evil once#I won’t go into it for the sake of time but. raises eyebrow. what the hell do you mean#at least I think it was unintentional. it’s still weird to me and I never bothered asking#anyway I should probably go back to sleep I have n appointment in like. two hours. sigh#yayyyy I love characters who suck!!! 🥰🥰🥰 pop off you asshole king and or queen
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wait i forgot im a grown up with an income *I* can go away for a weekend if these guys wont fuck off. wow. im a genius
#never considered this before but god fuck yeah why not#once i get. money fdcjnx#sad i missed the ausday weekend that would have been perfect but alas#whatever the next pubhol is im fawking OUTTA here#surely theres smth in between now and easter right#anyway im so like. i dont want to add any more meds and i dont think i really can anyway#im already on ssris what else is there#and its. manageable. its fine. but having to do this shit every month is so LAME#whateverrrrrrrr
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I miss you Lorna… this is such a mess
This is an old message and I had several other similar messages, but I miss you guys and hope you’re all doing well!! I’m sorry to see nothing has improved.
I saw I was kindly mentioned by @awesomefringey and some other commenters the other day, so just wanted to log in and say hello and log back out for a few more months. 💕
Sending so so much love to all of you. Take care of yourselves and each other, please.
The video is still on YT.
#Anywayyyyy#The fandom added a whole lot more C to my C-PTSD#So a nice random message every few months instead of a freshly posted death wish is LOVELY.#Don’t fret. On meds and therapied but fresh tf out of money from it so @ L and H… lornasaurusrexx at g*ail is the PayPal if ur bored 🙃#I hate to be like this but protect your hearts. They’ll never be able to look out for you guys and they feed these trolls ammo for snacks#and it seems to have only gotten worse. Gotta keep them hets hetbaited for their money whilst actively encouraging them to bully yall? Why?#STILL!? At this point it feels like they’ve both chosen that path deliberately now and I find it quite gross. but I’m also very far removed#So don’t worry about my opinions. Keep trusting your own intuition!!! You all see it. I love you guys and your beautiful hearts and empathy#But I hope they can sleep at night knowing the absolute fucking genuine WRECKAGE they left across the Big Gay War generation/era of Larries#Don’t worry guys I’m just as dramatic as ever. None of this has anything to do with them coming out or anything. Just how we were treated.#But trust I fuckin mean that shit from the deepest darkest pit of my Demon Larrie™️ heart. They encouraged this. 🤷🏼♀️#Anyone who cares about my actual life updates: I’m a school nurse now and will be working at a bougie summer camp over break#Had a surgery I needed. Got new tattoos and piercings. In a happy and healthy relationship with the best dude for almost a year now.#OH and I went to New Zealand last year with Prettytruthsandlies!!!! We made a pact back in our Big Gay War/college days to go. And we DID!!#I got overstimulated and overfed and puked in Hobbiton. 🤣 (It was the best time of my LIFE GENUINELY🥰🥰🥰🥰🥹🥹🥹)#Okay BYE LOVE YOU GUYS#There are better and more humane ways to maintain a closet ..like literally STFU entirely. Ignoring it and not exploiting a kid is FREE#🇵🇸
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Hmmm I don't think you can do that, store owner baby...... There's a little something called the state labor laws.....
#every employee at my job got paid a full 48 hours late#for the second time#and the store owner didnt tell anyone anything. we just didnt get paid. we had to reach out to him.#and now he's changing the pay periods for no reason??? i feel like i'm being gaslit because he hasnt mentioned anything#about the entire cycle being off#not to mention there have been times where people just dont get paid for shifts they clocked in for#i keep an eye on and manually log all my hours#because a couple months ago the paycheck i got was a full $200 short#and he didn't give me the money he/the store owed for like 2 more paychecks. a little under a month.....#i feel like this isn't legal#i don't think he can do these things.......
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everyone wants disabled people to get a job but no one wants to give disabled people the ability to work a job
#.bdo#no one hired me after about 30 job applications and 4 interviews after a whole year in this job program#back in the day i got every job I applied for immediately#and then when you do work a job they don't make it accessible for you#you get fired just for calling in too many times#even people who are able to go back to work don't#because they'd lose their housing assistance/food stamps/medicaid/utility assistance etc#and if they lost another job it means that they have to reapply for everything#my dr. appointments are $400/mo I get $330/mo food stamps I had $420/mo housing assistance $200/mo utility assistance#so that's $1350 a month in assistance plus my $760 a month = $2110#so if I go back to work I would have the same amount of money or less. I literally can't afford to work. I CAN'T AFFORD TO WORK.#(no longer getting housing or utility assistance now that I'm at my mom's so I'm currently paying more bills than I was)
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... why he sit like this
#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little#rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo#cats#It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually#getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol#Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime#I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad.#Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering#all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty#e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time#that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense#that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh#I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol#which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything#I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still#recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually#slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.'#ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever#reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished#any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky#and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly#going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et#etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make#stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin#.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care#and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists.#take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc#ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it#82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol......#ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol
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whatever dick decided to put adverts on prime video needs their balls chopped because why the fuck am I getting more ads watching shows legally than I ever have pirating.
#this is an actual joke#i am so fed up of money hungry corporations making my life more difficult than it has to be#arent prime rich enough?#they just wanna waste my god damn time and im sick of it.#YOUTUBE TOO#and any other site with ads#like get over yourself#AND TIKTOK#see even if im not seeing the official tiktok ads every second fucking video is someone trying to sell me some usless crap#i dont want to buy your cheap shit from tiktok shop im here for entertainment and thats it#i want someone to compile how much of my short life is spent watching ads#because life is fucking short and this is too much time to be wasting#(am i gonna stop and get off my ass? no probably not)#i just wanna watch the boys#ALSO WHO THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO HAVE SUPERNATURAL EXPIRE AT THE END OF THE MONTH#im losing my mind and you all get to hear it#prime i know where you live#amazon prime#the boys#supernatural#tiktok#YouTube#what else did i talk about?
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Starting to donate 15€ a month to a charity that helps refugees to spite all the xenophobes in this goddamn country
#personal posts#german stuff#working means i have more money!!!#so when today this dude at the train station asked me if I had a minute to donate for refugees i could#i love that#i signed up to donate every month#because refugees are people who deserve safety like everybody else and i can't believe this has to be said#every damn day you have to deal with xenophobia#it drives me up the wall#like where are my like minded people#come on
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