#and with Anders as well during all Act.1

[arrowhawkart]

Alright what's up everyone! If you do not follow my personal blog fair warning: I have become very suddenly obsessed with Dragon Age and have been playing thru the games for the first time ever- so expect the next chunk of art from me to be very Dragon Age-centric

So Anyways here's Atlas Hawke, the fun little guy I made for my DA2 playthrough and became incredibly attached to much faster than I expected.

More incoherent rambles and thoughts on my Hawke under the cut- it's very stream of consciousness under there and also very very long you've been warned

[ID in Alt Text]

Just like.... wow.... okay so I've now played through Inquisition and finished Trespasser and I've gotta say DA2 really took the cake for me, like by far my favorite of the 3. (Like please don't get me wrong it absolutely had it's issues I'm not saying it was a perfect game or that all the writing choices were amazing) But I just really enjoyed the smaller more personal scale of the conflicts in DA2, I liked that Hawke was even more Just Some Guy, and like yeah the Warden and the Inquisitor aren't like special chosen ones or anything, but they are both tasked with these gigantic world-saving country-spanning quests, and Hawke? Hawke is just a guy trying to do right by his family. Like he doesn't have any world saving mission. He is just trying to Get By and that really made this game hit home more for me than the other two.

I said I was gonna ramble about my Hawke and I just ended up rambling about DA2 itself... whoops. ANYWAYS- Atlas- My Boy Atlas- I recognize that a purple mage Hawke is the most common route people go and I am by no means unique or original, but this game series is very new to me, personally, and I'm having fun anyways. (From here on out I will be talking about my Custom Hawke and not like, Hawke the player character in general)

And gosh I'm such a sucker for complicated and messy family dynamics, and DA2 does that so well. Like the Hawke family is Fucked Up. Bethany gets killed by that ogre while they're fleeing Lothering when she tries to save their mom from said ogre, and Leandra immediately turns and blames Atlas for Bethany's death- and then later in Act 1, Carver, best baby brother Carver, also throws Bethany's death in his face while they're having their own stupid argument which started because Atlas was trying to cheer Carver up and boy did that fail dramatically.

Like Atlas is witty and charming and sarcastic and kind of an asshole sometimes, and comes of as incredibly over confident and cocksure and that's because he's very much been shoved into the role of 'okay you've gotta take care of everything and if you don't everything bad is Your Fault, and since you're in charge of taking care of everything, everything bad is automatically Your Fault No Matter What Anyways.' So he's gotta playact like he has everything all together and under control, because what the fuck is his family gonna do if he doesn't? And underneath all of that he's an incredibly stressed out guy, who does not feel like he can ever let on that he's stressed and making everything up as he goes and just hoping that things work out well.

And like he tries to do the right thing- by god does this man try. He brings Carver with him on the deep roads mission because he and Carver work well together! Carver wants to go! He loves his little brother, there is no one he would rather have by his side than his little brother! There is no one he trusts more than Carver to have his back! Carver and Atlas are incredibly close. Like Carver is the one person who actually recognizes that the way Leandra projects all of her own issues onto them, but like mostly Atlas, is really shitty! He acknowledges that after apologizing for his part in the argument I mentioned above. And then of course Carver ends up getting the Blight during the deep roads mission, because nothing can ever go right for them. Thankfully Atlas brought Anders along, so Carver is able to become a Grey Warden instead of DYING, but he has to leave, and Atlas doesn't even find out whether or not Carver survived his joining for months. And of course Leandra blames Atlas for this, she begged him not to bring Carver along with him, and he did anyways and now she's never going to see her youngest son again and it's all Atlas's fault. And that's how Act 1 ends and I just.... Auaghghghghhhh-

And then we've got Act 2, and like mid-way through Act 2 is probably the high point for Atlas. Things peak for him here and then it's all one big snowball downhill from there. So like, Atlas romanced Fenris, because this man is addicted to difficulty, and of course was going to immediately be infatuated with the guy that makes hating mages half his personality. (I mean it wasn't immediate, it was more of a slow build, mutual-trust, to friendship, to lovers thing, especially considering three years pass between Acts 1 and 2) And yeah, Atlas doesn't hide the fact that he's very into Fenris, and Fenris definitely hasn't seemed opposed to this. So after Fenris kills Hadriana and then they get together for one night- Atlas is like, riding the high of what was probably the first positive physical affection he's gotten since Carver left for the Grey Wardens three years ago. And then of course the following morning Fenris immediately breaks things off with Atlas, so what Atlas thought was going to be the start to a romantic relationship, just ends up being an ill-fated one night stand. And like! Atlas does not begrudge Fenris this! He completely understands Fenris's reasons, he is not upset with Fenris at all! He is still just completely crushed though. So yeah, things peaked for Atlas for like one very short night and then start speeding downhill. Because not long after that is when his mom is killed by a fucking serial killer. As if things weren't already fucked enough for Atlas, already having lost his twin younger siblings.

Also side note- I love the fact that DA2 is portrayed as Varric telling the story of Hawke's life to Cassandra, and that we know Varric is an unreliable narrator. Because like Leandra's last words to Hawke being that she's so proud of her strong boy- at least with how Atlas's relationship was with Leandra up to this point- felt so so out of character for Leandra, and I love the headcanon that that's Varric giving his bestie some closure narratively that he never actually got in reality. So like that's canon for Atlas. Because that was Leandra's decapitated head frankensteined onto another woman's body- and magicked into a reanimated corpse that absolutely did not seem like it had any conscious thought- like she was already dead before Atlas showed up. There were no final words. There was no nice narratively satisfying ending to that one. And I like it better that way tbh........

We're just gonna like skip over the whole qunari invasion subplot because I am. Not a fan of how that was handled. Writing wise. Like what the fuck was that. Like I have THOUGHTS about it but they're not gonna go on tumblr. Anyways. Moving on.

Champion of Kirkwall! Yay! Meredith knows he's an apostate mage and is just Waiting for any half-decent excuse to either bring him to the circle, make him tranquil, or kill him? Not yay! Atlas is absolutely good friends with Anders, and has been helping with the mage underground every chance he has. People in the city have been whispering about making him of all people Viscount and he has no idea how to feel about that, like he'd rather not, but who else is gonna do it? And who else would do it and actually give a shit about mages and elves and just like lower class people in general? Like this incredibly stressed out guy does not need more added to his plate, he really doesn't. But he's definitely thinking about it. I mean hey! It's not like he's got any family around to take care of at this point right? Why not just take that eldest daughter syndrome thing he's got going on and use it to fix the city?

The one bright spot for him here is that hey, at least he and Fenris get back together. That one's nice. They both deserve something positive and comforting after all the shit they've been through.

And then Meredith is trying to invoke the right of annulment and Anders blows up the fucking Chantry. And Atlas can't even blame him for it. After 6 or 7 years of painstakingly working to try to find peaceful ways to improve the lives of mages and getting blocked at every turn, with the knowledge that Meredith has been getting worse and worse and worse, and has been actively looking for any excuse to invoke the right of annulment and just kill every single mage in Kirkwall? And Grand Cleric Elthina has been absolutely no help, and has absolutely been subtly on Meredith's side the entire time. Like at a certain point, violence really does feel like the only option left. When you've been backed this far into a corner.

So obviously Atlas takes the side of the mages, doesn't kill Anders, is honestly like 'my dude, my buddy, my guy, my best pal(aside from Varric, and my boyfriend Fenris) why didn't you tell me? I would've helped you on purpose.' He's elated when Carver shows up during that final push to the Gallows, like the whole situation is absolutely shit, and it'd definitely be better if his beloved brother was no where near danger, but he's a Grey Warden now so that's not even an option anyways. So it's just nice to have him around even during such an intensely stressful moment. Honestly everything is so unbelievably fucked at this point that Atlas isn't even stressed anymore. Like things literally cannot get worse. He's kind of riding the high of things not being able to get worse. Or maybe that's just adrenaline. Who knows. Aveline and Sebastian both leave, Atlas is unbothered. Doesn't even try to convince Aveline to side with him later either, like he's never really gotten along with her, and he did not like how she treated Carver. Fenris and everyone else stick around, and that's what matters to Atlas, like all the people he was actually close friends with stick with him in this moment (Fenris, Varric, Isabella, Merrill, Anders, & Carver)

And then yeah, they save the mages, defeat Meredith, leave Kirkwall with the renegade mages. Everyone goes their separate ways due to one reason or another, except Fenris. At least Atlas does get to keep one positive close relationship around.

[the-cryptographer]

THIS USED TO BE A META POST BUT NOW IT'S ONLY A STORY ABOUT THE DUPLICITY OF MEMORY AND THE GREATER DUPLICITY OF THE DA2 DIALOGUE WHEEL

A friend asked me recently (read: within the last two years) my opinions about Enemies Among Us, which is one of the Act 1 quests in Dragon Age II. I responded that I didn't remember it too well and it didn't leave much of an impression on me, except for the disagreement with Carver and the approval check with Merrill that happens at the very end of the questline.

(As an aside, I had forgotten at the time it was the quest where Hawke gets thralled by a blood mage sex worker at the Blooming Rose, which does in fact make it a bit more memorable.)

But back to the disagreement with Carver: it struck me as interesting within the greater context of his shifting relationship with the templar order and him entertaining the idea of finding purpose and identity by joining their ranks. And the approval change struck me as interesting because I knew Merrill could grant friendship or rivalry points during that argument based on what to Hawke might feel are two cosmetically different 'pro-mage' arguments. In a game that, as it progresses, more and more forces you into binary choices between 'say a libertarian pro-mage thing' vs 'say an authoritarian pro-templar thing' it's interesting to see approval changes granted on other metrics.

Let me walk you through this last part of the quest up until the point my memory and the DA2 dialogue wheel failed me:

We're trying to hunt down a missing Templar recruit at the behest of his distressed sister. He's sympathetic with the struggles of mages and, through little fault of his own, has gotten himself targeted by a cabal of blood mages led by someone called Tarohne.

Hawke finds him in a secret lair in Darktown, when the clowns arrive.

Tarohne: How wonderful, more vessels for our experiments.

Hawke: Where is Keran?

Hawke asks where Keran is despite him being literally right there.

Tarohne: Perhaps the demons will find one of you suitable.

Tarohne is a somewhat delusional Tevinter-sympathising southern blood mage. Your normal midboss fodder. You get into a fight with her and kill her like you do with most people in Kirkwall as Hawke.

And once you're done taking care of her and rescuing Keran, Carver has a bit of a crisis of faith.

Carver: I never... I never understood why people could be so terrified of mages. Our family had two. You. Bethany. But this... Andraste was right to warn against magic.

Carver is, of course, a farmboy turned soldier from the Fereldan countryside. But now he's in the big city, and this is apparently his first real brush with how increased population density and a highly socially stratified population intersects with rising magical crime rates. Nothing about his youth growing up with a mage father and mage siblings has prepared him for the fact that some mages are *gasp* meanspirited murderous asshole criminals (ignore the fact that this perfectly describes Hawke, Merrill, and Anders all standing right next to him). He's starting to understand why people want the templars around and what they want the templars to protect them from.

It's at this point that the dialogue wheel rears its ugly head. But first we're going to pause and get back to that conversation with my friend.

I relay this general progression of this budding disagreement between Hawke and Carver to her, and go to look up on the DA wiki to confirm my suspicions about the Merrill approval change.

Sure enough, we see that depending on Hawke's participation in the argument, and saying what on the face might appear to be two pretty similar statements batting back at Carver, Merrill has radically different reactions where her approval are concerned.

This is pretty promising and exciting! Even moreso given the context. This isn't an argument Merrill herself is participating in; it's an argument between Hawke and Carver. But couldn't one hypothesise that Merrill's approval change here, based on the direction Hawke takes this argument, is reflective of who she is most empathising with: Hawke or Carver? That's even more exciting! Especially given Hawke and Carver are the two characters Merrill is able to entertain romantically in canon! One could consider it a bona fide shipping moment to the second power! Depending on what Hawke does here, Merrill will interact with both them and their brother differently, and make a choice that favours one over the other!

So I present this hypothesis:

Merrill has no reason to empathise with the crazy human blood mage Tevinter sympathisers going around tormenting baby templar recruits. She's well aware of the danger gangs of violent humans who feel justified in punching down can pose, mage or otherwise. And when Carver rightly points out this is a problem and Hawke, very calmly and measuredly and diplomatically, goes 'Not All Mages', Merrill can't help but feel this is belittling and condescending. Carver pointed out a real problem - the consequences of which just unfolded right in front of their eyes - and Hawke is giving him an in-denial non-answer. Does it remind Merrill of Marethari calmly and measuredly telling her, over and over again, that she's wrong and what she's doing and seeing and choosing are wrong and that the concerns that led her to these choices are meaningless and shouldn't exist? How can she not bristle at a Hawke like that, and in doing so sympathise with Carver?

But when Hawke says 'Templars are just as bad' that's another matter entirely. Hawke is no longer denying that these violent roving bands of human mages are a problem, but is rightly pointing out that violent roving bands of human templars are at least as big of a problem. Carver empathising with the templars and the paranoia against mages isn't a solution to the dangers people like Merrill *or* Hawke face, but a perpetuation of the problem. Even if Hawke isn't Dalish, they've still been hunted and harrassed by the same people. And when Merrill hears that, how can she not feel solidarity with and sympathise with Hawke?

My friend agrees this is an interesting analysis that ties well into overarching themes about Merrill's character and that, even if it may seem I'm reading too much into a small and minor approval change, that Merrill is rarely upfront enough about herself and her motives to glean a more direct meaning. One must split hairs and read between the lines a bit to understand her. We agree it might make an interesting piece of meta.

But now let's get back to the conversation with Carver and see what Hawke actually *says* when you click the diveging options on the dialogue wheel.

Carver: Andraste was right to warn against magic.

This is where we left off.

The aggressive response labelled, 'No one is going to lock me up.' results in no change to approval. It's where Hawke decides to take everything super personally.

Hawke: You think the templars should take me, Carver? Is that what you're saying? Carver: That's not what I meant!

The diplomatic response labelled, 'Magic is not the problem.' results in this dialogue:

Hawke: Tarohne made a choice to practice blood magic. Most mages are good people. Carver: You don't think I know that?

So Hawke basically just said most mages are good people by virtue of not choosing to practice blood magic. Hawke says blood magic sucks. And that's why Merrill disapproved.

The humorous dialogue option labelled, 'Templars are just as bad.' results in this dialogue:

Hawke: Of course, maniacs with swords and the Maker on their side have never hurt anyone. Carver: Maybe they have a reason.

So Hawke basically just said the Chantry and its Maker and its holy wars against the Dales suck. And that's why Merrill approves.

This was so much less complicated and exciting and interesting than it was in my head!! I can't believe I went through all this effort to replay this quest and upload and transcribe these screenshots only to realise how fucking banal this approval change actually is!!

But what I really want to know is, literally, how was anyone playing this game supposed to understand the choice they were making here?!

How in the world does 'Templars are just as bad' end up translating to a direct hit on the Maker?!

How in the world does 'Magic is not the problem' end up translating to 'Blood magic, specifically, is the problem'?!

How was anyone meant to interpret what Hawke would actually say from any of this, and in turn how it might affect any of the people listening?! Why are you even giving me a dialogue wheel when the responses I get clicking on it are completely unpredictable?! Who designed this gd game?!

This is now an extra long rant about how I need to install that mod that restores the DAO style interphase where you choose the exact dialogue you say. Because this is next level ridiculous. It is.

Carver: It's just that I never really thought about their side. Now I see.

In any case, no matter what you choose, Carver ends the conversation by saying this. Congratulations, bro, you are now the only one here passing that emotional empathy test.

[kirkwallguy]

please elaborate your hawke-anders-varric dynamic i'll make you a ferelden pumpkin pie

i feel like for once anders is the most normal person in this situation, but that's less because he's being normal and more because varric and marcus are crazy. in act 1 / before marcus and anders start dating, he's kind of equally obsessed with them both, he has an obvious deep infatuation with marcus that he's repressing (like. you know when youre 12 and don't know being gay is an option yet so you dont understand why you get so weird about your bestie? that's him except he's doing it in his 30s.) and with anders he's always down to be Gay As A Joke, and respond to anders' flirting and silliness because it's NOT gay to want to make your depressed friend smile. the whole love triangle of it all is never considered because varric is adamant he's straight and pretty sure marcus is as well. obviously he knows anders isnt because look at him

this is sustainable for a few years but obviously marcus and anders ruin it by getting together. varric REALLY disapproves of them dating but at first he mostly acts like he's concerned about anders. he keeps talking about how it won't last and how blondie is going to get his heart broken etc etc, to the point that people are actually thrown off a little and think he's in love with anders. but no he just thinks only HE can handle marcus lol. anyway no matter how much he tries to get them to break up they won't, and he slowly starts to resent anders as marcus starts prioritising him over hanging out at the hanged man or fucking around lowtown during the day.

(also this entire time marcus kind of hates varric but in the way you'd hate a brother. which doesn't help the situation at all.)

anyway, chantry explosion happens and this is varric's final straw, he sees marcus forgiving anders as a massive symbolic betrayal. the entire narrative twists in his mind so anders has always been the problem, he writes this narrative in his book (i love imagining that he doesn't explicitly write marcus and anders' relationship and it's left ambiguous/implied lol) and sends it to marcus to make him understand, but all marcus gets from it is "holy shit, varric's in love with me." (anders finds his hilarious because he's known since they all met and just assumed that was why marcus didn't like him)

umm this makes skyhold very awkward. because marcus is having such a terrible time (missing his family and surrounded by templars) he kind of just agrees to put everything aside and be civil with varric so he has someone to drink with in the evenings/to talk him out of killing cullen. they bond over the few weeks or so marcus spends there and it's almost like old times for a moment. but then marcus is sent to take the wardens to weisshaupt and says goodbye to varric. varric makes marcus promise to visit him in kirkwall when all this is over and marcus promises but doesn't mean it. they write a handful of letters to each other when varric is made viscount but aside from that they never speak again. marcus doesn't think about him much and varric never gets over him <3

[vanilladella]

7 8 17 and 18 for Forrest n Fenris :3 <3

LMAOOO HI BABES THANK U. this got long so under the read more it goes

7. During act 1, what is the LI's thoughts on Hawke as a whole? Do they like them, can't stand them, etc?

complicated is the word id use here lol. tbh forrest confuses the hell out of fenris; forrest is both physically powerful n clearly a talented mage but he doesnt... do anything w it. he carries his friends on his back, he helps old women cross the street, he hardly even raises his voice, especially not at fenris. forrest is so different from everything fenris knows abt mages n it both confuses n upsets him. forrest also clearly respects fenris an insane amount n fenris doesnt know what to DO w all of that. hes pissed at his choices n the company he keeps more often than not but he finds hes not... scared of him. ever.

forrest pays him for his help n gives him gifts n does favours n spars w him like theyre friends n he doesnt know if he wants to befriend a mage. the more he finds himself liking forrest the more confused he is.

like i cannot overstate how much forrests gentleness confuses him. even during the magistrates orders quest when anders accidentally burns half of forrests face n body he isnt angry. instead of smiting anders from this plane n into the next forrest worries for anders n begs them to make sure the little girl they just saved wont see him in fear of scaring HER. that type of selflessness goes against everything fenris has ever seen n experienced.

they butt heads more often than not n fenris finds himself liking their arguments bc forrest always gives as good as he gets n vice versa, n it scares the shit out of fenris that he KNOWS him giving his opinion or needling forrest actually wont lead to any repercussions bc he isnt used to being treated like that.

so tl;dr: hes pissed n scared bc he actually isnt scared of forrest or actually dislike him. go figure

8. And what are Hawke's thoughts on their LI during act 1?

LMAOOO HE THINKS HES SO HOT LETS GET THAT OUT OF THE WAY FIRST. he finds fenris endlessly fascinating n feels a type of pull towards him -- he wants to know more abt this strange elf that stumbled into his life.

he feels insane sympathy towards fenris for what hes gone through n fully does understand his hostility towards mages but kinda refuses to entertain much of it.

the more he gets to know fenris the more he rises to the bait n argues abt it w him but he never dismisses fenris' concerns n makes it a point to hear his input on p much everything. hes insanely curious of fenris n WANTS to get along w him more than anything n trusts him probably more than is wise. funnily enough the more they argue n butt heads the more forrests trust of him grows: he appreciates that fenris is v straightforward n vocal when hes pissed w him bc forrest hates NOTHING more than he hates passive agressiveness n spinelessness.

forrest actively seeks out fenris' company n asks him for kinda insane favours like finding a good nameday gift for carver or to take care of his dog lol.

17. Does Leandra know about their relationship (or at least, about Hawke's feelings?). If so, what is Leandra's opinion on their LI?

oh she KNOWS lol. i mentioned this in the previous ask as well but fenris is the one who is charged w taking care of leandra when forrest n carver are in the deep roads n they get quite close. n well. leandra is his mother she can tell when her son likes someone, forrest has never been subtle abt his feelings.

at first she has concerns: an escaped elvhen slave who literally wears spikes to ward off any n every attempt at contact? a man who is so deeply hurt by whats been done to him that he struggles w even the smallest acts of kindness? not exactly husband material, esp considering forrest is her last child left, the only one who can carry on her family name.

so at first she pushes back on it. she arranges dates n dinners w any woman suitable n is happy when forrest goes along w it. but as i said earlier she Knows him n she knows thats what hes doing; just going along w it. it takes her almost all of act 2 to come to terms w it but eventually she does give forrest the green light to go after fenris if he so wishes. shes quite happy its fenris of all ppl hes interested in!

unfortunately forrest never tells her that fenris left him n she dies before he gets the chance to. shed be very happy to know they worked things out n stay together.

18. If Carver or Bethany are alive, what are their thoughts on Hawke's relationship with their LI?

carver is weirded out lowkey lol. he idolizes fenris n thinks hes insanely cool (he has a v teenaged boy reaction to finding out fenris was involved in getting him a nameday gift) so he genuinely does NOT get why hed ever even entertain forrests interest in him. his big brother is lame n fenris can do better.

for the short duration hes there in act 2 hes a lil.. confused by the tension between them. he never knew them to be exactly friends but now forrest is smiling a bit too wide for it to be genuine n fenris keeps staring at him and turning away right before forrest catches him looking.

his confusion just grows even more by the time legacy rolls around bc by now fenris is downright MEEK. why is he surprised forrest grabbed him along. why does he keep throwing these longing glances at him when his back is turned. why does forrest hesitate before touching him. what the actual fuck happened between them. i dont think he manages to bully the answer out of forrest as tensions are already high so he opts to hold his brothers hand instead, like they used to do when they were kids.

he finally gets his answer after the chantry blow up n sees them necking eachother n tbh. at that point hes got a healthy self-esteem, he stands by forrests side instead of behind him n hes a bit too busy to actually be bothered by it. good for u forrest, carver says. good for u. once he gets to meet their kid a few years later he is a v doting uncle n is genuinely happy forrest has someone like fenris on his side.

THIS GOT INSANELY LONG IM SORRY LOL BUT THANK U FOR ASKING!!!

[cactusringed]

top 5 video games or cheeses idk whatever u want answer more

OK I already answered cheeses so it's viddy game time. Viddy games I love u

5. Dragon age

U wld expect it higher bc it's my fav game series of all time but my feelings abt it are... Very complex. I have a blogfull of those lol. So it gets 5th place. It does have my favorite character of all time ever tho (anders beloved. He was right and justified btw. I have written several essays defending him.)

4. Undertale

I have replayed ut so much I have over a hundred hours in it. This is a game u can finish in like ten hours tops. Tho tbf a chunk of these hours is me getting stuck on sans fight lmao BUT I BEAT HIM AND NOW I'M P GOOD AT HIS FIGHT. anyway. Very good. Masterpiece of a game. U don't need me to tell u

3. Clair obscur: expedition 33

I wasn't sure whether to include e33 on this list because I beat it so recently but... God. It's just. A masterpiece. The storytelling, the cinematography, the characters, the voice acting, the MUSIC, the gameplay... Fuck dude. And a game that made me cry this hard deserves a very high place lol.

2. Baldurs gate 3

Fuck dude. Just. Holy shit. I was giddy the whole time during my first playthru. This is what I wish dragon age cldve become. It's been made w so much love. Theres so much depth in there. I love making absolutely OP builds. Also astarion and karlach mean so much to me. They're so well written and the way they experience their respective trauma... Man.

1. Nier automata

Man... This game. Another one I wanna learn to speedrun lol. One of these games that gets you so hyped and makes you feel like a god when u play. And the story man... Holy shit. The meta 4th wall breaking stuff it does is awesome. Route C... Fuck. Genuinely blew my balls away. Masterpiece of a game. The feeling upon finally finishing it... I was just sobbing my eyes out lol. I still listen to the ost every now and again because it's soooo good. Absolutely amazing game. 9S my baby boy.

[a-drama-addict]

chloe for 1, 2, 4, 5, 8, 9, 11, 13, 14, 15, 20 heehee :3

[ask game] YEAHHHH CHLOE TIMEMEME!!!!!

1. What kind of person is your OC in a crisis? Are they calm and collected? Do they panic? Or are they chronically the cause?

I mean. She is calm, usually. She likes to pretend she's calm more than anything, she wants to be well adjusted and collected during a crisis so bad but she just can't be. So she just. lies through her teeth and pretends to be calm (not amazingly)

2. Is your OC a loner or a social butterfly? Are they satisfied with how they come across to other people?

Social! Chloe likes going out a lot, enjoys making friends and even acquaintances on the regular! She's sillay like that (not relatable). As to how she comes across to other people she just doesn't.. really care? I mean she cares a little, but the general public's opinion? Eh.

4. Does your OC have a failed friendship or relationship they still think about? What happened? Is it an unresolved regret or is there a chance for reconciliation?

Hm. Carver.

It isn't failed in a sense that they don't care for one another, or that they don't love each other, or that they don't grow to understand one another. It's just the regret that their issues were never really about one another as people, just.. about the situation. The carelessness in which Chloe wanted to live and in the anxiousness Carver knew she had to live. The clashing of those two factors was intense most of the time, but it is still something she regrets. Regrets not being able to... just be with Carver in the way she wishes.

5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?

Blood magic for sure- but specifically kind of... slashing her wrists/palm open and infusing her blood with ice magic so she just kills bitches with blood shards. (IS this possible? i dont know its cool though). learned it from her bestie merrill <3

8. What was your OC's most embarrassing moment? Does it still bother them or are they able to shrug it off?

Hmmmm probably when she was a teen, like seventeen maybe, she tried asking out a girl for the first time ever and oh was it so scary. She had hyped herself up all night "You got this, you've got mom's looks plus dad's charm has to work!" and this would've worked if Chloe didn't get so nervous her magic acted up. And burnt every flower she picked to a charcoal-y mess. She managed to pick SOME only for it to flare up again in the moment when she gave them. she was dying internally

9. Is your OC laid back or do they thrive on drama? What role do they play in their group of friends/associates?

Chloe's pretty laid back, usually acting as more of a... passive bystander to personal dramas within her friend group. Fenris and Anders want to kill each other with hammers? Okay, she's gonna drink ale with Isabela, Varric and Merrill.

11. What does your OC believe in? God(s)? Monsters? Love? The power of unbreakable bonds of friendship to overcome any obstacle? The ability of money to open any door? Or are they indifferent?

Chloe's pretty indifferent. She believes in people, in the good of people. She really wants to believe in it, she doesn't know what else to believe in.

13. How important are romantic relationships to your OC? Do they prefer casual sex, short flings, or long term relationships? Do they want to get married or are they content with what they have? Or do they have no interest in romance whatsoever?

Chloe's relationship with romance is complicated. She yearns for it on a deep level yet doesn't know how to act around it, she can't stand the thought of marriage and yet if she is in a relationship all she wants to do is marry the woman she is dating.

When she gets with Isabela it's all very "Hell yeah the hottest woman in all of Thedas is about to sit on my face" but when she catches feelings it's like... "Can we please hold hands i want you to my mom during dinner. if that's okay. i'm sorry that was so cringe i can show my dick instead"

She does prefer long term relationships. she can't imagine not wanting it

14. How important is friendship to your OC? Do they prefer to have one or two close friends or a large group of casual friends? Or do they prefer their own company over that of others?

SHE LOVES HER FRIENDS!!!!!! SHE LOVES HAVING AN INNER CIRCLE AND OUTER CIRCLE OF FRIENDS!!!!!!!! SHE LOVES BEING IN BIG GROUPS OF PEOPLE AND BEING IN THE COMPANY OF HER LOVED ONES!!!!!!!

15. What places hold significant meaning or memories for your OC? Do they have a positive or negative association with those places?

Kirkwall. It's like, yeah obviously. But so much of what Chloe is and becomes, it's all tied to that rotten city isn't it. She's met everyone she cares about in recent memory there, met the love of her life, learned everything she could about her magic, and truly experienced a semblance of freedom. It's both Hell on earth and paradise at the same time

20. Has your OC ever done something terrible and lied about it? Did they run away or blame someone else for it? How long did they maintain the lie and did the truth ever come out?

mmmm no. Chloe is pretty upfront with all her actions even if they ended up being terrible. She owns up to the way she helped Anders, unknowingly, get supplies for blowing up the Chantry. She hates that about herself, but can't lie about her involvement. It's things like that, she couldn't ever truly lie about things of her fault. she could lie about the size of the statue in her honour while standing right in front of it, but never things she has actually done (this is where she and Varric clash a lot)

[faux-fires]

tagged by @ranilla-bean for the 20 questions meme!

1. how many works do you have on ao3? 35

2. what’s your total ao3 word count? 466,309. Hey, that's not too shabby!

3. what fandoms do you write for? Currently NONE. previously: dragon age, tsubasa chronicle, supernatural, fullmetal alchemist, legend of zelda...

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Your Princess is in Another Castle ("Dragons kidnap princesses, everyone knows this… except sometimes, they get it wrong. Or do they? A story about mistakes, misunderstandings, and flower crowns. Also Kurogane's non-stop never-ending suck of a life, and the idiot that causes all that chaos to begin with.")

For Better or for Worse ("A 'five things' fic, featuring five different times Hawke proposed to Anders.")

The Centre of All Things ("Hawke gave Anders a ring, after their first night together, and never quite told him what it meant. As Kirkwall begins to crumble around them, Anders struggles to strike a balance between love and the needs of the mages.")

Adjustment ("A year after the end of Act 2, Anders comes home late, and Hawke missed him.")

Bound ("Anders receives many gifts from Aggressive!Hawke across the years. He's charmed by most of them, surprised by others.")

most of my fics predate ao3 and while i backloaded the TRC ones on, I can't be bothered doing the same for the FMA fic i wrote 20 years ago. and the SPN stuff, uh, well, AO3 kind of did it for me! i woke up one day and an old archive i forgot my fic was on had been ported to the archive, all my spn fics helpfully attached to my account in the process. when i tell you i orphaned them at something like the speed of light -

5. do you respond to comments? Um.... I MEAN to, but.... i'm not great at remembering...? i really cherish every one i receive and i KNOW it's bad of me, i can only offer apologies.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? i literally just write happy endings i can't answer this

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? how are defining happy??? look mikke takes the piss out of me ALL THE TIME for my definition of fluff, ever since i entered a fluff vs angst competition on the side of team fluff with a story in which one half of the otp was tortured and murdered (he got better)! *i* define a happy ending as one in which, during the course of the story, a character grows and develops. by that metric, an ending where the character loses everything and everyone they love but gains a mindset enabling them to find peace with the loss is a happy ending, TO ME. a sad ending, by contrast, is one in the character does not grow or change, and stays in the same state (or worse!) than they started the story.

so with that in mind, probably through a forest wilderness. people die! anders and hawke are rejected as monstrous by the people they tried to save! but they gained one (1) feral orphan and solved their relationship issues, d'awwww. <3

8. do you get hate on fics? nope

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind? yes, but not in EVERY story. i find smut to require a lot of effort to write! there's complex choreography and emotions to handle... the only thing harder (HEHEHE) is fight scenes for the exact same reason

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written? i'm not interested in crossovers (blorbos from series a meet blorbos from series b) but i love a good fusion fic, where blorbos from series a have always lived in the world of series b. craziest... probs the trc/wow fusion fic i wrote for an audience of three people? idk i've written a lot! i dreamed of a zukka howl's moving castle fusion a few days ago (probably inspired by chiptrillino's gorgeous illustrations she's been sharing recently) so that was pretty fun, as someone who very, very rarely remembers my dreams.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? nope!

12. have you ever had a fic translated? yeah, to russian!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? yeah, @mikkeneko and i wrote a whole SPACE OPERA. well. half of one, i guess (oops).

14. what’s your all-time favourite ship? whatever i'm shipping at the moment

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i plead the fifth

16. what are your writing strengths? EMOTIONS. also i think i write humour well?

17. what are your writing weaknesses? starting, continuing and finishing. /sob

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? even if you're fluent in that language, it alienates more people than it impresses, i think. i love using other languages as an easter egg (like rana has a character named with a cantonese pun in the iconoclast) but whole dialogue is like... very hard to pull off, and outright mortifying if you don't actually speak the language and just google translate it.

19. first fandom you wrote for? the legend of zelda! my irl friends and i (aged 13) had a massive shared self-insert 'verse going on. my first steps into fandom PROPER tho was with fullmetal alchemist.

20. favourite fic you’ve written? this is a complex question because how do you define favourite? swift illuminations was probably the most fun to write (anders vs hawke arm wrestling) and i always enjoy getting to write comedy - your princess is in another castle has my favourite lines i've ever written, for example:

"Can I go?" Yuui asked Ashura. Despairing it was, then. At least he wasn't naked. It was a low bar to meet in terms of presentation, but so far two of the six people in this room weren't making it.

these skies are breaking i've always been fond of because it's 35k and i wrote it in two days but the plot is uhhhhhh. missing. ash on the windowsill same sitch, 50k in 36 hours and my first completed multi-chapter fic but i wince at how clumsy it is when i reread it. i'm proud of a lot of my later dragon age fics because they contain better exploration of ideas and characterisation, so... idk. toss up!

but in terms of stuff i'm most satisfied with, probs 'how to love a god' this short character exploration piece i wrote for the anderszine. first time writing second person and because of the zine space limit i had a hard maximum word count too so i agonized over every word choice. i don't really edit my own stuff - i post it pretty much hot off the hoop - but i did actually enjoy doing it that time.

uhhhh so that's me. but i'm tagging.... anyone who wants to do this!

[diamond-dangeresque]

for what i do love about this game—and i love a lot!!!—there are certain things about the story i wish we had either the opportunity to do or otherwise capitalize on

and i'll throw dat shit under a readmore for spoilers. you know. for a 13 year old game lmao

(also i will be using he/him/his pronouns when referring to Hawke simply because my first playthru was Garrett Hawke and therefore i think of Hawke in those terms)

so from the second we deal with Quentin and find his stash of books and letters during All That Remains, including one signed from his "very good friend “O”" i knew two things:

Orsino is behind this, and

i want to cave his smarmy little skull in for being an accessory to Quentin's atrocities, including MY MOTHER'S MURDER

and while i am aware that this can be kinda-sorta dealt with on a Templar playthrough, what bothers me is that i have no way to Deal With This Information until basically the end of the game, which feels...i dunno, like maybe there should have been a side quest of investigating these documents either solo or with the help of Aveline, Templar!Carver/Circle!Bethany, maybe even Anders or Varric, but it feels really weird that you find a letter that definitively proves Quentin was 100% not alone in what he was doing, and Hawke's response is 🦗🦗🦗

now yes, in the immediate aftermath he's mourning or grieving or drinking himself into a stupor or whatever Hawke (yours, mine, otherwise) does to live with not being able to save his mother in time, but it's still then Very Odd that he never just...follows up on this. like "welp, mom's dead and i killed her killer, who was definitely and apparently working alone. somehow. yep."

i would love a sidequest like that works like this, slowly piecing together who could have been assisting this madman by finding additional clues, locating “O”'s dead drop point, finding out it's the Gallows's First Enchanter being this serial killer's accomplice much to [Anders's horror//Aveline's disgust//Fenris's "well I can't say this wasn't unexpected but what the fuck"//etc etc], and then like

idk

maybe you can have a chat with Meredith abt it, convince her that No The Mage Circle Isn't All Bad, It's Just Orsino, starting an investigation and then gathering the evidence needed to convict him (and maybe optionally getting him in a room and beating the unholy piss out of him, real "Smash A to Break Orsino's Nose" kinda stuff) , and thennnnnn. idk, have him hung from the Gallows!!!! good shit, justice for Leandra and all the other women murdered by Quentin, closure for you and your sibling,

or you can take vigilante justice on him and. "hey Meredith, so Orsino died. yeah, he fell down the stairs. tripped on his robes, broke his neck on the way down. terrible shame. tut, tut. (please ignore the bruises and broken bones.)"

and then we're like "welp. so the Circle needs a new First Enchanter, aaaaaand 1. Orsino had like no protege lined up for this, and 2. no one here wants to be First Enchanter anyways" so you could potentially set up smth like

Hawke can become First Enchanter if he's a Mage

Bethany can become First Enchanter (probably easier to convince her on a high Friendship rating)

One of the mages you spared (and still lives) from Acts 1 and 2 could be trained to become First Enchanter; personally I think Alain's got gumption, but to each their own, yeah?

of course i know the problem with this story is that it kiiiiiiinda pulls away from the whole "Mages vs Templars butting heads and also the Chantry blows up" story point that 2 wants to get to, though tbh I don't think these have to be mutually exclusive?

Meredith can accuse Hawke of conspiring to lead the rebellion himself and doing so by taking Orsino's place, taking advantage of Meredith's "trust" (whether or not that's true is up to you) and thus being both the more dangerous mage of the two and proving—to herself, ofc—the inherently duplicitous nature of mages as a whole

Meredith can accuse Bethany of being a tool for Hawke's conspiracy against her, effectively using nepotism to undermine her authority and maybe even fearing being replaced herself by another of Hawke's buddies (which is absolutely not true, but red lyrium is a hell of a drug, so 🤷); this can even tie back to a choice you can have on Meredith's side where you can execute your sister or not to prove your loyalty (which obv doesn't work, but y'know 🤷)

Meredith can distrust any of your First Enchanter choices due to a wide variety of reasons: lack of experience, lack of talent, your sympathy being used against you for a position they do not deserve, I Just Don't Fucking Like Them, etc etc

it also creates this cool throughline of Quentin's fuckery being a consistent B- or C-story for Dragon Age 2, underneath Mages Vs Templars and The Qunari Are Vibing (Until They Aren't).

like. if Meredith is gonna be The Big Bad Evil Person no matter what route you take, that means you do have some flexibility on the story along the way.

but the story was also cranked out in 18 months under EA's infamous pressure cooker system, so i don't blame any of the writers for Not Thinking Of These Things, i get it, i do

and if you just want to Skip That For Whatever Reason and go through with what's already there then you can also do that. i guess. (you monster.)

the only other major grievance i have with the game is that Blood Magic Hawke isn't as story-polarizing as it could be. yes i know Blood Magic wasn't as big of a deal even in Origins/Awakening as the lore and story make it out to be; as a Grey Warden you at least get the excuse of "whatever it takes to kill the archdemon, ya feel me?", but Hawke has no such excuse and if anything having Blood Magic should both 1. be a major story beat changer, and 2. be non-reversible (mostly due to the first reason; would be kinda weird if you went Blood Mage for the story stuff, then headed over to the Black Emporeum, chugged a weird potion you got from a dusty-ass shopkeep, and went "nah i change my mind")

and yes, i am also aware that Blood Magic wasn't even going to really be a thing (PC) Hawke could have, and it was basically shoved in last-minute with not much to the story to supplement that. but there is still something to be said about a lot of missed story opportunities involving this. there was also apparently a cut storyline about Mage!Hawke dealing with a near possession attempt, and that both could have unlocked Blood Magic permanently and be yet another cool way to integrate the innate Weirdness of mages into your story

........but i digress, because after that it's mostly very minor grievances about Things I Want But Do Not Have that could probably be fixed with mods if i searched hard enough.

also: no post-game cards about my friends or my lover. come onnnnn. it's literally static text on a background. this isn't hard to implement!!!

ok rant over i'm gonna crawl into a hole now and cry about anders

[mermaidsirennikita]

Hi Caro 🥰 would you be willing to do a top five ranking for 1. Top Five best love/sex scene writers for romance and 2. Top five best love/sex scene writers for specifically historical romance?

Hi! Of course I would, my filter is liberal and I love talking about sex scenes so much.

So generally speaking, I think the top 5 for me would be:

Sierra Simone--just the queen; she writes so many different types of sex scenes so well; monogamous, polyamorous, f/f, m/m, m/f, any combination of the above. The scenes feel varied and unique; there is a vast difference between the intense but also kind of funny sex you'll read in The Last Crimes of Peregrine Hind versus the weird, dark-yet-hot orgy scene in A Lesson in Thorns. Even the types of domination and give and take are different. Like, both Lesson and New Camelot feature an m/m/f dynamic, but the way Auden conducts himself as a dom is so different from the way Ash does. And the way Poe and St. Sebatian submit shares so few similarities with Greer and Embry's submission to Ash. She's amazing.

Joanna Shupe/Mila Finelli--there is obviously a big difference between the way she writes sex scenes as Joanna versus Mila (I would say that even the pretty intense sex in Joanna's self-published novellas isn't quite as high octane as what she writes as Mila). But either way, I think she manages to make the sex feel unique to the couples, and she makes it very interesting and at times funny. Like, even when characters are having rough sex, there's an element of humor to it when appropriate; like the scene in Mafia Madman when Enzo has Gia chained to his bed spread eagle and is fingerbanging her while his employees work on renovations in the same room, lol.

Tiffany Reisz--I think a lot of Tiffany's work straddles the line between romance and erotica, and I'm including her because like... she can write a really dark scene that does not express love in the way I imagine a lot of people see it, while still conveying the love. I mean, she wrote a Catholic priest who's an actual sadist and literally cannot get it up without inflicting pain... But I still found him very compelling and completely believe the love he feels for his lovers. Does she go too far sometimes? Yeah. But when she hits, I think she hits very well and Tiffany at her best is provocative while also creating this amazing emotional connection between the characters.

Kresley Cole--writes some of the most insane paranormal sex scenes (blood blowjobs, fucking on an altar in the jungle, heroes literally hulking out during sex) while somehow keeping you in touch with the romantic connection between the leads? Her non-PNR sex scenes are just as good. I just enjoy her creativity and total commitment to the cause. Like, I still think of her kicking IAD off with things like... Nikolai commanding Myst to come while holding her magic chain, and Lachlain chasing Emma through the woods in full beast mode to deflower her, lol.

Adriana Anders--I've only read one of her books thus far (oops) but Possession really blew me away in terms of sex scenes. Not just in terms of the kink involved (I mean, there's a consensual kidnapping) but in terms of the total acceptance of kinks and different means of sexual expression. You can feel the love and respecting for that world in her writing.

Historical-specific:

Joanna Shupe--all the same reasons as before, but I also feel like Joanna does a great job with writing sex scenes that are more inventive for trad historicals. I loved Lockwood being into rough sex, and this being treated as valid and not abusive. It feels like a lot of trad heroes have to apologize away even super light kinks to satisfy readers.

Grace Callaway--Super explicit and creative, with a focus on acts that aren't super common in historicals (butt stuff). I enjoy the kink positivity and normalization of like... the sexually voracious heroine. She writes with humor AND heat.

Elizabeth Hoyt--The icon. I love the individualized distinctions in her sex scenes, her commitment to writing sex in uncomfortable places (like death row) and the general earthiness with which she writes. It's very evocative.

Scarlett Peckham--Scarlett explicitly explores kink in her books, and writes a rarely truly submissive historical romance hero (it's not just "let her ride me" it's "thank you mistress may I have another"). At the same time, she also writes great dominant heroes. Her most recent book allowed the hero and heroine to have a random threesome with a buddy in the middle of the book. I so appreciate that approach.

Cat Sebastian--Cat's sex scenes aren't always as explicit as the above authors' (they kind of vary) but they're interesting and creative. Even when the pairing is m/f, they are not always straightforward heteronormative scenes in terms of their dynamics and preferences. She thinks outside the box.

[faithliesinashes]

Excuse me, but do you not count Fenris's Bitter pill a companion mission? You only need to take him out of Kirkwall ONCE to get it. Oh well.

I do but I never triggered it because I've been running with an all girls squad this time around. I only took him out once during Act 1 when first meeting the Arisok because I like it when he asked if the Arisok wants us to kill Javaris.

I only took Anders with me to the Deep Roads as I wanted Bethany to become a Grey Warden, something I've never had in a DA2 playthrough.

Personally I think it highlights a failure in the game design. If you failure to trigger the ambush then there should have been an alternative, hell, the ambush should trigger without Fenris in your party, which would allow you to either pursue them and then tell Fenris or, tell him what happened and then have him insist on accompanying you.

It is what it is. If I decide to use this Hawke for an Inquisition run (unlikely at this stage) then I'll just use the Keep to say it was encountered.

I'm also playing a 2 handed Warrior this time, and I always try to avoid the same weapon style non-mages in a single party.

[mikilavellan]

Ooo okay

1. Hawke looks more like Leandra. Makes act 2 on very hard. Bethany and Carver look more like Malcom.

2. Hawke was always too soft to be a soldier and hates conflict unless it is in someone else’s defense. She loves words more than her bow. Her belief that the world is largely good fades, as does her self confidence.

3. Hawke always wanted to leave Lothering, but not like this. She now regrets not appreciating it more.

4. Hawke had to be the strong one. She hasn’t processed it properly. She cries over his death at the same time as Leandra’s because it takes that long to let herself.

5. Hawke has always been close enough to Bethany. Protecting Bethany is why she didn’t leave Lothering. Her relationship with her mother was fraught as she often ended up parentified. Sometimes she resents that the twins are given more leeway and lighter punishments than she did as a child.

6. Hawke would beat the crap out of Gamlen if it weren’t for her mother. After her mother’s death she never speaks to him unless prompted.

7. Hawke joined the mercenaries. It felt more honest as an option to be a hired sword than a smuggler. She would be proved wrong quickly.

8. Hawke never considered not taking care of her family as an option. It’s such a part of her she doesn’t know how to put down the weight until it’s taken from her.

9. Repay the witch and be done. Dealing with trickster dieties never end well.

10. She finds Varric charming, but also a lifeline. A pleasant person who makes her laugh and gives her hope.

11. She did recruit everyone! She feels fiercely protective of all of them, but Varric is less a protectee to her than a confidant and best friend. Isabela makes her loosen up, but still stresses Hawke out with her decisions. Aveline taking care of her is flattering but she is not used to it so she’s often caught off guard.

12. Hawke is closest to Varric. He makes her laugh and they keep one another grounded.

13. Hawke cannot stand Meredith but will aid her if it keeps her eyes off Merrill, Bethany, and Anders.

14. Hawke mistrusts blood magic, knowing only Andrastian descriptors of it. She’s supportive of Merrill because she understands Merrill’s motivations but also very scared of losing her friend to it. She tried to convince Merrill to give up blood magic after Leandra’s death but ultimately acquiesced for the sake of the Eluvian.

15. Hawke wants to stay out of it. She’s a rogue and out of the way is where her sister is safest. She tried her best to play both sides and stay as neutral as possible until she couldn’t anymore. In which case she sided with the mages because of Bethany. She comes off as a very non confrontational, even wishy washy, in all matters but her family.

16. Bethany dies in the deep roads. Hawke is gutted. Bethany was her closest friend all her life. She wishes she had died in her place.

17. Hawke likes the Arishok! He seems a decent sort. Or so she thought. After all, he is a refugee too.

18. Hawke mistrusts Cullen by virtue of being a potential threat to her sister, but thinks him a decent sort. Her expectations of him are so low to start that every interaction pleasantly surprises her. He wins her over completely when he stands up to Meredith on her behalf in act 3.

19. Hawke sends Feynriel to the circle because she believes the circle is the only one who will help with his dreams. She’s seen how the elves treated Merrill, neither curbing her blood magic or helping her find safer solutions for the eluvian. During Feynriel’s dealings with demons, she accidentally frightens him into begging her to make him tranquil. She obliges. She never forgives herself for it.

20. She absolutely helps Aveline get married! She and Isabela go over the top scheming. Aveline is family now and family gets what Hawke thinks is what’s best for them.

21. Hawke helped Merrill fix the Eluvian. She understands the importance of wanting a piece of your ancestors. She wanted to know the Amells just as badly. Merrill keeps the mirror intact.

22. Hawke understands Justice. Does she consider him slightly unpleasant and nerve wracking to be around at first? Yes. But his protectiveness of Anders and his loved ones is familiar. Soon he’s just a member of the gang.

23. Hawke loves Fenris deeply. She is willing to give him the “been making decisions for himself for less than 10 years of course he’s adjusted terribly” pass but still will jump in to defend Merrill and Anders. The fact that he’s willing to let her drag him on mage related rescue missions also makes her think he’s not a lost cause. Because she tries to see “both sides” she often manages to piss off both Fenris and Anders equally.

24. Bertrand is alive, the idol piece is gone. She’s not about to lose Varric to that BS.

25. She did not recruit him

26. She only felt betrayed when she thought Isabela wasn’t coming back. All was forgiven as soon as Isabela returned.

27. Hawke blames herself for Leandra’s death, for not being faster and solving the mystery sooner. She also becomes far more disgusted by blood magic than before. She becomes overwhelmingly more angry and depressed. Part of this is that her mother dies the day after Fenris breaks up with her. If not for Varric and her she would have descended into immobility.

28. Hawke friendmanced Fenris. For Hawke, love is taking care of someone. Somewhere in teaching Fenris to read, hunting slavers, and ensuring his continued freedom, caring about Fenris became love.

29. Hawke gained the arishok’s respect. She dueled him one on one but was not happy about it. She still believed these issues could be solved by words. She admired the Viscount and is angry on his behalf, but mainly grieving the city she cared about changing so drastically overnight and so many prejudices “vindicated”

30. Hawke has grown to love Kirkwall enough that she wants to protect it. She wishes people in power would stop leveraging her though.

31-32. She cannot stand Meredith. Hawke hates how Meredith abuses her power, how much fear she stirs. She grudgingly works with Meredith mostly to ensure her eyes are off Anders and Merrill. She quite likes Orsino and is disgusted to learn he worked with the man who killed her mother. Yet another person she respects or looks up to gone. She wishes the pair would stop using her as a messenger. This is neither her circus nor her monkeys. Elthina has her respect. She would do anything for elthina and subscribes to her line of thinking, that it can be fixed still.

33. CONSIDERABLY BETTER NOW THAT HES BACK

34. :(

35. :( :( :(

36. Betrayed. She knows he knows if he told her, she would never have helped him. She also wishes he would have because she loves him a lot. Even though she wouldn’t have helped. It breaks her heart.

37. Delighted she’s not the last hawke!

38. She introduced charade and gamlen for charades sake. Not gamlen’s. He is not family and will never be family.

39. Heartbroken. Of course she can’t kill Anders. But the violence seems senseless to her. She knows why. Of course she does. But she didn’t realize how far gone the city was. She held out some hope that decency and non violence would win out in the end. She overestimated the good in her city leaders. Still, she sticks with Anders to the end.

40. Mages! That’s her sister and her two best friends. It’s amazing how fast wanton violence can make a complex situation suddenly clear.

41. She travels with Fenris. The plan is to find a place far enough away from the madness and settle down. They never do, often rotating between staying with friends.

42. Yes of course!!

43. She doesn’t read it except for the excerpts Varric reads aloud to her. She knows Varric was kind to her in his retelling but she sees her failings in the story. She supports Varric however and thinks the idea is fun.

Questions for Hawke

Mixed some Act 2 and 3 stuff for the companions so that I didn't have to ask the same thing twice.

Questions for the Warden/HOF can be found here.

Does Hawke look more like Malcom or Leandra? Do they look like their siblings?

What is Hawke's personality and does it change during the years?

How did Hawke feel about Lothering? Did they like their home?

How did Hawke react when Malcom died?

What was Hawke's relationship like with their family prior to Lothering's destruction? Who are they closest to?

Does Hawke like Gamlen?

Who did Hawke join - the mercenaries or the smugglers? Is there a particular reason for it?

How does Hawke feel about taking care of their family? Do they feel like they're carrying a burden or do they assume the responsbility?

What are their thoughs on Mythal/Flemeth?

What's their first impression of Varric?

During their first year in Kirkwall, did Hawke recruit everyone? And what are their opinions on the whole group?

Who is Hawke closest to in their group?

Is there someone, from the Kirkwall gang or an NPC, that Hawke does not like? Why?

How does Hawke feel about blood magic?

How does Hawke feel about the rising tension between mages and templars?

What happened to Bethany/Carver after the Deep Roads expedition and how does Hawke feel about it?

Does Hawke like the Arishok?

How does Hawke feel about Cullen? Do they like him?

What was Feynriel's fate?

Did Hawke help Aveline get laid married?

Did Hawke help Merrill fix the Eluvian? And did Merrill break the eluvian or is it intact?

How does Hawke feel about the whole Anders-Justice situation?

What are Hawke's thoughts on Fenris and his opinion of mages?

Is Bartrand dead or alive? Did Hawke let Varric keep the red lyrium?

Did Hawke recruit Sebastian? What are their thoughts on him?

How did Hawke feel about learning the truth of Isabela's artifact? Did they feel betrayed or did they understand her?

What were Hawke's thoughts after Leandra is found dead? Did they blame themselves or someone else? How did they grieve?

Did Hawke initiate a relationship with any of their companions? If so, why were they attracted to that companion? Was it a frienship or a rivalry romance?

Did Hawke gain the Arishok's respect? And how did they handle the Qunari invasion?

How does Hawke feel about being the Champion of Kirkwall?

What are Hawke's thoughts on Meredith, Orsino and Elthina?

How does Hawke feel about helping Meredith and Orsino?

How is Hawke's relationship with their love interest after 3 years?

If Bethany/Carver is alive, how is their relationship after so many years like? And how is it after Leandra's death?

What is the fate of Merrill's clan?

How does Hawke feel about Anders behaviour (in regards to him being secretive about the 'potion') in act 3? Are they suspicious of him or are they understanding?

Did Hawke find Charade and how do they feel about discovering a new cousin?

How is Hawke's relationship with Gamlen after all these years?

How does Hawke react to the explosion of the Chantry? How do they feel about Anders's actions and do they kill him or let him live?

Who does Hawke side with - Mages or Templars? And why?

What does Hawke do after they flee Kirkwall (if Viscount, after they are disposed by the templars)?

Do they try to keep contact with the other companions?

How does Hawke react when Varric publishes the Tale of the Champion? Have they read it?

[squirrelwithatophat]

Anders and the Blooming Rose

It’s a fairly minor part of his character, but I find it hilarious that Anders, "The Healer” of Darktown, really does not like the local brothel.  If you take him with you while purchasing “services” from Madame Lusine, you get this reaction...

“You’re not this desperate, I hope.  I treat a lot of these customers in my clinic.”

Then if you ignore the warning and do it anyways (you know, because Hawke)…

Anders: rivalry +5

It’s not a moral condemnation, a complaint about wasting time (à la Beth or Carver), or a vague expression of disgust (of the sort Fenris or Merrill reply with) — Anders, the closest in-universe equivalent to a doctor, is warning the player-character away from soliciting prostitutes on health grounds.

One interesting aspect of Dragon Age II is that it contains many more specific references to disease — which makes sense, given the medieval urban setting, where the top causes of mortality would realistically be infectious disease.  Gamlen explicitly refers to his parents dying of “cholera,” a highly lethal (even today, untreated cholera has a case fatality rate of up to 50%) water-borne illness, and the water supply in Lowtown is described as dangerously contaminated (Hawke can refuse to drink it “even on a dare,” Merrill refers to something “twitching” in the water even after boiling it).  A random NPC asking Lirene about “The Healer” complains, “I can't get my brother off the boat. The grippe's [i.e., the flu] got him bad.” Then there are the multiple references to unspecified STIs, all of which come from (or at least are associated with) Anders.

There’s an amusing line from Anders upon entering the Blooming Rose for the first time (usually but not necessarily during Enemies Among Us in Act 1):

“If someone tries to hire me again, I’m leaving.”

Now, some fans seem to read this as a claim that the Blooming Rose has tried to hire him as a sex worker, but I believe there’s a more plausible interpretation here. (Frankly, I have difficulty imagining that a brothel would be obsessed to the point of harassment with recruiting as their newest rent boy a man in his mid-30’s — and one who, need I remind you, lives in a mine shaft connected to a sewer and notorious for its toxic fumes, dumping of rotting corpses, and disease outbreaks. And no offense to any Andersmancer reading this, but is he really that good-looking?).

Most likely, the brothel is looking to hire an in-house physician (or Thedosian equivalent). Anders is referred to curing STIs and providing other reproductive care. In introducing him, Lirene says, “He's closed their wounds, delivered their children.” One of patients in her shop can be heard crying out, “My mother's in labor! The baby's come early. Can anyone help her?” To which Lirene replies, “I'll send word to the healer.” (Anders may have been delivering babies back in the Circle as well, considering that in MoTA, he says, “At the Circle, any accidental babies are taken away before the mother even sees them.” This could, however, simply be common knowledge among Circle mages). It’s also implied by Wynne that Circle mages practice contraception: “Such births [in the Circle] are seldom, as there are ways to prevent it, but it does happen.” Moreover, Anders appears to be the only person in Kirkwall willing and able to provide these medical services. There are references to useless quacks (e.g., “some purveyor of hensbane and leeches”), but it’s acknowledged in-universe that the only effective healing comes from mages. In DAI, the Inquisitor can express surprise at the presence of a “mundane” (non-mage) surgeon, who goes on to insist that such non-magical methods will be developed in the future, all of which further reinforces the (in-universe) social/cultural equation of healer as mage. Mage healers only appear to be let out of the Circle on rare occasions to treat members of the nobility, but ordinary people don’t receive such consideration. Even the viscount’s seneschal has to seek out Anders for help. In DAI, Cullen casually moons the idea of “healers’ clinics with templar support” (among other potential “opportunities to work outside the Circle”) as a totally novel solution to mage “resentment” over confinement. The Chantry thus far wasn’t willing to release mages to treat sick commoners even with phylacteries to deter escapes and Templar overseers breathing down their necks the entire time; in fact, they were rather reluctant to let out even a handful of senior mages to fight alongside the king against the Blight, something which threatened everyone’s lives fairly equally (and even then couldn’t resist the temptation to make the mages feel as unwelcome as possible). “The Healer of Darktown” was well-known to illicitly (that is, in defiance of Chantry restrictions) provide health care for free to the masses, and this service not surprisingly had earned him quite the number of admirers and defenders. Lirene resists being threatened for information about him by saying, “Any Fereldan in the city would lay down his life for the healer, after what he's done for us,” and a mob of Ferelden refugees even prepare to attack the heavily-armed party out of fear that the latter might harm him or report him to the Templars.  His Act 2 Codex likewise reads: “When not with the Champion, he spends his time among the Fereldan refugees in Darktown, healing their ills and counting on their loyalty to protect him from curious templars.” Should it be a surprise then that a private business might be interested in his skills, especially when disease is threatening their bottom line and injuring customers?  

In the game, we actually see two frequent patrons of the Blooming Rose end up in Anders’s clinic for treatment.

Dissent (Act 2), if Isabela has been left behind:

Anders: ...don't come running to me next time you pick up one of these diseases.

Isabela: Isn't that the point of magic?

Hawke: I don't want to know.

Dissent (Act 2), if Isabela is in the party:

Seneschal Bran: And that will, ah, stop the itch?

Anders: Yes. Though I would stay away from women you meet in the port. Pirates tend to... dock in unsavory places.

Isabela: I heard that!

Anders: Just use the salve if it comes back.

This is probably also what Isabela is referring to in the opening to Speak to Fenris (Act 2):

Isabela: So the seneschal's tax collector won't be coming around again, like you asked. Funny story.

Fenris: I'll pass, but thank you for the help.

Isabela: Spoilsport.

Seneschal Bran appears to be a regular with a particular fondness for Serendipity, a drag queen (or transfemme?) and one of the highest-paid workers at the Blooming Rose, whose gender nonconformity is generally Played for Laughs.  Bran can be seen on a “date” with her at Duke Prosper’s party during Mark of the Assassin, and Serendipity can later be heard commenting, “I haven't seen the seneschal much lately. Don't tell me the man's gone religious” (to which someone responds, “No, he just keeps terrible hours now”).

Isabela, of course, talks about sex and her enjoyment of brothels (including the Blooming Rose) quite frequently.  In Dragon Age Origins, we meet her dueling two men at The Pearl (Denerim’s main brothel), and she can (in)famously be talked into a threesome or foursome with the Warden and their LI, although in that game it was unclear whether she was hiring prostitutes or simply ended up there in the course of searching for dueling partners (given that the building had been occupied by mercenaries, and one of the optional quests in Denerim is to clear The Pearl of disruptive mercenaries on behalf of the city guard) or following/checking on her crewmen. In DA2, it is confirmed that she was going to The Pearl for sex, and Anders remarks, “You used to really like that girl with the griffon tattoos, right?” to which Isabela replies with the name “The Lay Warden.”

(For now, I’ll just ignore the unfortunate implications of Bioware depicting a promiscuous black woman repeatedly contracting STIs and unrepentantly spreading them to white men for blackmail purposes.  But yeah, yikes).  

Historically, the emergence of STIs as a major social problem has been associated with urbanization and military mobilizations — basically, situations in which large numbers of individuals had opportunities for unprotected sex, especially with multiple partners, away from the usual social control mechanisms such as cockblocking parents (and virtually all sex was unprotected until latex condoms began to be mass-produced in the 1920s-30s). Without the safety measures we have in place in licensed brothels today (e.g., condom requirements, regular STI testing), brothels and red light districts were superspreader bonanzas, and perhaps unsurprisingly, medical professionals tended to take a rather dim view of them, to put it mildly. Modern readers often historical interpret opposition to brothels and camp followers (in the military) on the part of medical and public health authorities as expressions of prudery, religious conservatism, and/or misogyny, and to be frank, they very often were. Yet at the same time, in the pre-condom and pre-antibiotic era, STIs represented a major public health burden and cause of disability, disfigurement, infertility, and premature death, and there few practical measures beyond simply urging everyone to keep their pants on (which worked about as well as one might expect).

Circling back to Anders, it's notable that he takes a much more negative view of sex in the second game than in Awakening, during which he seemed eager to hump anything that moved. This could at least in part reflect the influence of Justice, who seems to regard anything other than fighting for justice and engaging in public service to be "selfish" and even slothful (as in demon-y sloth). Or simple aging and maturity. Or, on a meta level, it could be an odd re-characterization due to the change in writer. But I like to think that his newfound discomfort with no-strings-attached boning is an unfortunate side effect of being a charity doctor working into the late hours to accommodate an endless stream of dick wart patients. It's already a shame that his clinic and service for the poor is relegated to such a background element, especially given the role such work would realistically play in forming a person's character. In terms of character development, it would have been interesting to explore how his work in the clinic could itself had a radicalizing effect — after all, it would bring him face-to-face with the tragic consequences of Chantry policy on mundanes (rather than just mages) as well as demonstrate magic’s contribution to the greater good on a daily basis. But this angle unfortunately never comes up in-universe.

TL;DR What I'm actually saying is that the real tragedy of Anders's character arc is the profound decrease in sluttiness between the two games.

[vigilskeep]

So, how does Kier feel about all these folks following him about?

i did this back in the day when i was still playing the game near the end of act 1 i believe. so let’s see where we’re at now!

anders: both self-explanatory and far too much to explain here. love of his life! <3

varric: how many times a day can you threaten to strangle someone while it’s still affectionate?keir’s here to answer that question. he provides the aggression and leadership, varric does the thinking and diplomacy, everyone present is still trying to find a polite way to ask who’s the sidekick

merrill: amicable exes. besties. keir trusts merrill more than anyone else in the world

isabela: thick as thieves!! they can always rely on each other when it counts. he very earnestly cares about her which she finds baffling, and vexing, and has had a frankly corrosive effect on her self-preservation (she tells him all this while sitting on his lap and he’s like “do you want to go kill people together abt it because you have to get off me first”)

fenris: they have a very easy friendship because socially they click well and keir’s iron loyalty was really what fenris needed. they have their disagreements certainly but when their enemies are at the door they know who they can count on. fenris’ loyalty in the very end meant a lot to keir

aveline: increasingly volatile. they hate all each other’s opinions but are protective tanks trauma bonded for life. “it’s basically like siblings fighting,” says keir, showing up back to the estate with a black eye. “that doesn’t sound right but i don’t know enough about siblings to dispute it,” says anders. he blamed her for his mother’s death to her face. she canonically has no other friends and gets married at his house. i don’t know what else to say

sebastian: they really were friends during the game. rivalry path, sure, but friends, close ones even. he was in the party a lot. seb might have too much bloody chantry rhetoric in his head but his enthusiasm could always lighten keir’s mood. he was there for keir a lot after his mother died. but, well. we all know where this is headed

[ziracona]

Okay but a follow-up sort of to last night’s post, about Anders, and his entire issue with Justice being his internalized self-loathing, guilt, and fear, over being a Mage, drilled in by the chantry, and not his rage or hate or the act of having combined with Justice at all. I mentioned Bethy my beloved little sister in passing as determinately the only character besides Hawke who can be supportive of Anders (until the end of Act 3, when Isabela and Merrill both determinately get a hell of a glow-up as well). I just want to say shout-out to Bethany? And what a fundamentally wonderful force she can be in Anders’ life? (Assuming she’s the living sibling, and becomes a Warden, not a Circle Mage). As Hawke, even being kind to Anders as much as you can, you have /no/ option to tell him he’s straight up right about Justice and what he did or is doing, until /Act./ /THREE./ before then, you can be sympathetic to his struggles and supportive of his general efforts, but that’s it. Bethany? Is WONDERFUL. To him in Act 1. Here’s a collection:

She gets him, she likes him, she understands him, she supports him and validates his cause. She’s a lot like him. But maybe most singularly notable? Until Hawke’s opportunity during Alone in Act 3, she is the only character in the entire game who does or can condone Anders’ choice to save Justice, and try to help him feel better about it.

I haven’t got all their Act 1 dialogue for Legacy, but I took them and Varric during Act 1, and they were great. She, Hawke, and Varric were so understanding and kind and worried about Coryphius’ influence. Anyway I know the appeal of playing a Mage!Hawke is hard to get past, but I am /begging/ you guys to try Rogue or Warrior because Bethany is easily one of the best characters in the game.

[hanna-kin]

Nyhetsmorgon - Edvin Ryding

Second interview

Anders: Finally...Edvin Ryding, welcome. Congratulations, 2021 years Rising Star at the Stockholm international film festival.

Edvin: Thank you very much. 

Jenny: Does it make you happy though? Because you've been in the business for many many years already.

Edvin: It's been a slow rise... not but of course it makes me happy. It's an honour and it made me quite surprised because the other actors that were nominated are amazing. 

Jenny: But you've been in Gåsmamman for instance and many other shows, even as a child actor and now you've grown into more adult roles. This summer you had your international breakthrough when Young Royals was released on Netflix. How would you describe how it has changed other people's view of you?

Edvin: Wow, I don't know. I hope that people have not gotten a different view of me because I don't see myself as a different person now but of course I've noticed that I have a lot more people paying attention to me now compared to before.

Anders: In what ways do you notice?

Edvin: My followers on instagram have increased a bit...

Jenny: Quite a lot actually.

Edvin: Yeah by one million. Sure they have increased a lot. People get in touch and are really proud and happy...and moved. It's really beautiful.

Jenny: Do you get other types of job offers now?

Edvin: Yes and no.  When you do a really popular role there's always a risk that you'll get type cast. There's been many offers for roles that are very similar to Wilhelm but of course other types of roles as well. Maybe more offers than before. And more international offers. 

Anders: You've done so many things. You started out at five years old. Then we've seen you in gåsmamman season after season. Let's watch some clips. You are realy young in the first seasons...

Anders: What has it been like doing this kind of role that has grown up from a little kid to almost an adult. 

Edvin: It's been nice. I think it's been...It's kind of unusual to get the opportunity to work with the same character for so long and get to portray him growing up. I was tiny in season 1 and now you almost got dad vibes with taking the kids to daycare.  

Jenny: BUt can you also reflect on the things you've learned when it comes to your job as an actor during this time?

Edvin: Absolutely. BY season two I think, Stasse Soulis, who's also on the show, said to me: The best thing about this job is that the more you learn about being an actor the more you realise how much you've yet to learn. You'll never master it. And I've really learned alot from Gåsmamman. 

Jenny: We actually have a message for you

Edvin: No way? Really?

Stasse: Hi, Edvin, congrats to your award.I'm so proud of you. I'm not surprised at all because I know how good you are. And I'm so happy that you finally get to show it to so many people all over the world. A huge congratulations. I love you, bro.

Edvin: That's so sweet. 

Jenny: Do you have some sort of mentorship between you? 

Edvin: Yes definitely. Stasse has taught me alot. He's had a similar journey to me. He also started out young and has continued acting. He's been a great support. Even in private life with school and how he's managed school and work at the same time. I love Stasse. He's really wise.

Anders: There will be a season 2 of Young Royals. Have you read the script?

Edvin: No, not in its entirety. I've had them tell me a few details. But soon we'll be in full production.

Anders: How does it feel, making a season 2 with those high expectations? 

Edvin: There's some pressure, of course, because we have an audience that wants a lot and likes to give their own tips for plots and such. At the same time we are not doing it for the audience. Don't get me wrong. We love that the audience is watching and likes it but the main purpose is to tell a story. And I believe that it will be a really good season.

Jenny: We had David Dencik here last week who stars in the latest Bond movie. If you could dream big, pick one director or movie you'd really want to do internationally.

Edvin: I'd like to do a Wes Anderson movie. Lately I've been a bit obsessed with him. I think he is incredible. He almost has his own genre. 

Jenny: I can see you in a movie of his.

Edvin: Really? Okay... We'll see. JUst call your agent...let them work. 

Edvin: Exactly

Anders: You are in high school and you are going to school after this interview. HOw's your attendance? 

Edvin: It's okay. I got a warning a month ago that it's been a bit low. I'll be in school during autumn and next term will be a bit more challenging. BUt I only have one year left.

Anders: Your goal is to graduate?

Edvin: You'll see me at graduation. 

Jenny: And you'll ride on the back of a lorry?*

Edvin: I hope so. It would be fun. If everyone gets vaccinated and the cases of covid keeps being low I hope to have a traditional graduation. 

Jenny: It will be exciting to follow your journey. Thank you for coming here. And congratulations on the award.

Edvin: Thank you so much and thank you for having me.

 *a tradition that graduates go together with their class on the back of a lorry or a huge trailer after a tractor. It’s wild and dangerous and not covid safe.

[natromanxoff]

Queen live at Råsundastadion Stockholm, Sweden - June 7, 1986 (Part-2)

Freddie's voice is in top shape tonight, and he sings many of the songs closer to the record version than ever before. He sings One Vision with such excitement (he messes up a few words, but the feeling in his voice overrides any shortcomings). It's clear that he's thrilled to be back on stage. The first few shows of the tour really exhibit the post-Live Aid energy. The band doesn't follow Freddie's "one more time" cue out of the breakdown in A Kind Of Magic, but they recover perfectly well. A couple bars later, he says, "Keep on going!" After the song, "I don't care what you say. I like the rain. I like it. If you don't like it, fuck you!" In the ensuing vocal exchange with the audience (showcasing Freddie in brilliant voice), the audience are right with him - for a while. After holding a very high note for a few seconds which the audience can't match, he says, "Wait a minute," then on his next offering, he increases the power and length of the note, which they can't quite match either! Freddie, after Another One Bites The Dust: "For those of you who don't know, this is the start of our new American... American, new European tour, right?" Bohemian Rhapsody is played very early in the set tonight - an experimental move on their part, as it was quickly moved back to where it belongs for the remainder of the tour. The impromptu that follows is a pretty unique-sounding one, during which Freddie sings 'Get Down Make Love' a few times. Brian, before Love Of My Life: "It's very nice to be back in Sweden after a very long time. Thank you most of all for believing in us. We love you." He then says to Freddie, referring to his 12-string acoustic, "There's no chance of getting it in tune; I'm sorry." After the audience sing part of the first verse on their own, Freddie shouts, "What about the people in the back? Hey!" Freddie still tells a variation of the same joke before Crazy Little Thing Called Love on most nights. "I only know three chords on the guitar, and you'll be hearing two of them in the next song." One of the opening acts on many nights of the tour is Gary Moore, once a member of Thin Lizzy who opened for Queen on their North American tour in 1977. Pics 1 and 7 were submitted by Alessio Rizzitelli, pic 2 is from Fabio Tosti. Here are a couple pro pics from the opening night of the tour:

Here are a couple reviews of the show in Swedish.

(x)

Fan Stories

“On June 7th 1986 I was at the first Queen Magic Tour gig of all at Rasunda Fotbollsstadion. I remeber that I never had seen such a huge lighting rig or stage, for that matter, ever. The energy was awesome and Queen really did great for a first gig of a tour. They never played Friends Will Be Friends but I didn't care since all the songs were huge numbers. Rasunda was absolutely sold out and this gig remains the best done gig in Sweden ever.” - Anders

Part-1