#and wish his family is going ok
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i really was needing this explanation. ivan just couldnt ignore his club cocaptain
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I like the fact Tremaine's designated color is pink while Germaine's is maroon because if I draw them together it looks so bright and happy but they're in a dying world and both commit crimes many times a week just to survive. But hey, whatever.
If love is how they die, it beats starvation or injury! So letting them be codependent is like a treat almost.
#my characters#germaine and tremaine at least have each other (and kind of adopt motka as familial)#as mentioned prev with germaine who is the material wealth based layer guy#tremaine is the layer of lust and motka (who i keep mentioning) is the layer for gluttons#but while germaine is pretty much the embodiment OF being overly greedy and materialistic is incredibly rational#and while he hates it he knows when to cut a loss (item wise)#tremaine while the layer of lust and who does like the idea of having a fling has minimal desire for an actual romance#and based on the world they live in he knows its not really reasonable to expect a lot of intimacy and is mostly fine with it#but to cope with that lack of intimacy he is very touchy feely with the team including draping over his brothers back#or hugging motka whenever he wants despite germaine and motka being very much not fond of contact#to them its like ok fine tremaine is the exception but no one else can touch me#motka as the layer for gluttons is a bit different in that he is more uh.... the layer rather than the glutton#so he likes to cook and he likes to make others eat and he doesnt really eat much himself#hed rather make that someone elses joy especially since resources are hard to come by#so he acts like the group mom and germaine (as one of the oldest) is group dad and they're most of the reason why the group stays alive#also oddly enough to point out but germaine and tremaine are the only sibling layers while other layers DO have siblings#like the other oldest one has a younger sister and the team doctor guy has two younger siblings (twins)#and then the youngest member (limbo) has an older brother#so yeah i dont really know why the wellington brothers get to both be layers but theyre making it everyones problem#i really liked the cast for this plot but i dont really have much in terms of how i wanted the plot to go ?#so i dont draw them a whooooole lot but been thinking about these codependent brothers lately#and final note but motka used to have a younger sister but she died from illness which is why he is so lenient with tremaine#hes like i wish i still had a younger sibling so now you will be like my family if youd let me#and tremaine blissfully unaware for the longest time that THATS why motka is so lenient with the touching from him#its because hes more pleased by the Still Having a Sibling Aspect rather than pleased with tremaine
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Hooray... it's 7 in the morning and I stayed up all night listening to the imperium... I feel so happy and satisfied with my life choices...
I am feeling very much not cowabunga, dude
[SEVERE rambling in tags]
#ouww it hurts!! it hurts!!! this is the stuff you're supposed to leave for angst fic writers not make canon in an alt universe?? ERIK PLEASE#i hate the whole entire world right now. genuinely cannot speak to anyone normally for the next 3-4 business days.#I have no one irl to rant to about this FUCK im stranded. im quarantined. im being held against my will free meee#The irl friend i have who knows anything at all about redacted only knows freelancer s1 i cannot drop this bigass plot on them#Genuinely i might start going mad out of repression. Erik writing “hope you enjoy” in the desc as if that wasnt the most painfully torturou#experience I've ever had in my life. The fucking inevitability. I knew Echo was going to pull some shit. IM JUST GLAD VIN AND FL ARE OK#they were NOT the turning point just let them live their cabin in the woods fantasy for however long they can okay...#Also I kinda love imp!vega. not the biggest fan of prime bc of the whole child beating situation but i sure loved this guy.#really knew what he was talking about when it came to revolutions and stuff. Like he's good. no disrespect to avior but vega did good#and he was so gentle with his partner which i find more appealing than torture but that's just me. that's just me i get it#And uh. speaking of that. Imp!sam. Yeah i get why some of yall are goin wild over him and i wish i could say i shared the sentiment but hes#too scary im weak like that. when i know a bastard would simply kill me without a care im just not into that yknow? or maybe you dont#Glad we got twisted gay damihux at the end though MUAHAJAJA that's one of the only redeeming lights that kept me alive#FUCKKKK SHIT FU K SJIT DAM ASHERS ENTIRE SCENE WITH BRACJIUM GOD HELP ME. ID DIE FOR THAT MAN#he's so fucking sad!!! he just wants his husband back!!! HE WANTS HIS FAMILY BACK!!!!!!#No even I don't understand how it's possible to get this attached to characters. I don't know. Im in deep shit.#Is this the end for me? Is my life over? These are the questions I have today. I probably just need to sleep because again#it's 7:30 in the morning. but regardless. These characters mean so much to me and this silly anthology has pulled emotions out of#me that i am terrified of feeling [survivors guilt hits me right in the fucking heart] and im scared. of what? don't know#That little shit Echo was right about one thing. It may not be real but the emotional damage it caused me is real. AND IRREPARABLE#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redacted imperium#redacted imp!asher#redacted echo#redacted imp!vega#redacted imp!sam#redacted vindemiator#tired of tagging. hitting the pillow. good night.
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Good afternoon everyone...I love Arthur so muchhhh
#jane journals#self insert talk#🎄 my christmas wish 🎄#HEEM I WATCHED THE MOVIE /AGAIN/ LAST NIGHT WITH SOME FRIENDS#AND I /WILL/ WATCH IT AGAIN SOON I'M SURE#but hhngghh i love him so so much i love everything about the movie and abt him 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖#i wanna snuggle him and run my hands thru his fluffy hair 😭😭#and i had some dreams about him last night 😭😭😭 theyre kinda vague and weird but we were definitely dating#it was actually a bit sad cause. ok like i said dreams are weird and i got chosen to become the lady of the lake#apparently thats a thing in my family in my dream. a woman in my bloodline can be summoned to be in the lake for an indeterminate amount of#time. and i was sad cause it meant i couldn't be with arthur so i told him to go and forget about me#it didnt rly get resolved as dreams often go. BUT STILL THERE WERE SOME CUTE MOMENTS IN THERE#and when i woke up i was on my back and my arthur plush was snuggled on my chest >///<#i have work this evening but ill b thinkin about him the whole time
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i miss her…
#cant believe i forgot about her till the photobook q&a im so sorry witch mona~~~~~~~#press f for honeypre atelier gachas it was gone too soon™️#(currently e x t r e m e l y worried and stressed for tomorrow like never before b u t i have to appear like im fine sobs save me monachann)#(can i go on a stress-prompted tangent here about something inane? no? toooo bad im gonna go off anyway~~~~)#ok so. like. since witch mona is the image i have up ‘ere and since it’s still 七月… today’s tangent will be on irl spooky stories!!#s o. presenting a decently repressed memory from my childhood that resurfaced while i was hibernating at home:#anyways. well. thoughts about the afterlife can vary from person to person yes? there’s no one true correct belief after all#but the one question that unites us all is probably the one and only ‘are ghosts real?’#and well. for personal reasons i think so. i mean i’ve seen this one dude i hate get possessed a couple of times so welp. cant deny it ig.#wild story about that actually. back in the day my family’s finances were allegedly doing so badly that [dude i hate] had to pick up#a *c e r t a i n* side hustle for extra cash. that side hustle? literal grave digging at the cemetary. at night no less#and *ofc* he wasn’t respectful about it in the least so ofc some spirits followed him home. yay. free roommates.#one(?) of them even took residence in my room at the time and im 80% sure they ate my history textbook :( much sads#anyways well once that guy had too much to drink (which was rather often tbh) he’d get possessed. fun!#the only possession i ever saw was the n-rarity angry ghost who’d just huff and puff in silence with unfocused eyes most of the time#he’d occasionally put on a leather jacket too. but that was like a r-rarity event that didn’t happen that often#my mother had the chance to also witness the mosquito (who tried to barge into my room for fresh blood) and the 姑娘 (self-explanatory)#which is kinda unfair tbh. i wanted to see the ur-rarity ones too :( mostly bc it’d be funny to see a guy i hate act ooc (impure intentions)#oh right. how did we get the dude out of his possession? we just shook his arm really hard. prolly caused some lasting effects but who know#i think he could also just sleep off the possession but idk i was asleep for the ur-rarity incidents.#cant ask the one witness of it bc i dont want to bring back unnecessary flashbacks of [guy we hate]#anyways it’s been years since we moved out from that place and i still want my history textbook back. mostly for the principle of it but—#and so that’s the tangent of the day. i feel weirdly less stressed now thanks witch mona#i do wonder how my grandparents are faring on this 七月 though…#b u t !!!!! tomorrow’s date on the lunar calendar says it’s an auspicious day for wishful activity and starting a new job!!! so… maybe~~~~?#hauauauauauauauuauaaaaaa anyways insane tangent over stream mona’s new album ok bye#oops forgor to disable rbs i hate how easy it is to forget to use this function man
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Sacred Heart of Jesus, Ukrainian Catholic Parish of Tolstoi, Manitoba
#manitoba#ukrainian history#tolstoï#tolstoi#catholic church#church#ukrainian culture#evidence of life#my grunkle’s family church before he left for the great wife nowhere he never liked talkies about his life before meeting tía abuela#the photos before their meeting were left in a box somewhere whenever asked to talk about but then he refused not wanting to talk about it#it makes me so emotional but im so happy he got out and grew our family#ok im feeling emo im going to post about the funerals again :/#must’ve been half asleep or shaking typing that good lord#ok so basically this was my grunkle’s (great uncle’s) family church located in the bush behind the bush of manitoba where a lot of ukrainian#ok so basically this was my grunkle's (grand uncle's) family church located in the bush behind the bush of manitoba where a lot of ukrainian#people settled this was one of the photos in his box that held photos of his life before leaving the farm and meeting my tía abuela and#and thus growing our family. when asked about the photos or the time in his life when they were taken he’d refused to talk about them#wishing to talk about anything but that time in his life information on such is basically unknown as his memory towards the end didn’t#include these memories nor did ever get around to sharing them he often said he wasn’t ready it was obviously the worst parts of his life#i’m so happy that he was able to leave that space and create our family im happy we got to live him and still love him that he made better#memories in our arms
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listened to music too loud I’m normal again
#the truest repairman posts#Wish my dad would stop bringing his new family to my house 😆😆😆 when they have their own house 😆😆😆 that they can go to#I don’t know why he feels compelled to be here I feel like it’s clear that his visits are negatively impacting me#And my self sufficiency#Rather than helping which is why he’s usually here#God being upset about stuff makes me feel like a child. Jack homework assignment say it’s ok to have emotions 15 times#Vent#what is tumblr for if not oversharing
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I don't think mikes family was informed after his car accident, mostly because the guys knew mike to be kinda extremely weird about contacting his family about things and they had all learned well enough to never contact his family unless under explicit instruction to do so, so even though for like the first 2 weeks they were uncertain if mike was even gonna survive, they held off on contacting his family at all, even though they probably should've. I think they decided they'd only do that if mike actually passed, which thankfully he never did
#m&m headcanon#as we go along#i love babbling about my canon its about that time again#anyway. i think they were gonna ask him what they should do when he woke up from his coma#but when he awoke he was in total amnesia for like two weeks#so it wouldve been useless to ask a man about a family he doesnt even know he has. a man who doesnt even know who he is nonetheless#i think qhen he finally fully came around atleast mentally he resolved to not say anything until reasonably recovered#even though the guys kept urging him that he should say Something. but he felt they didnt need to know anything as long as they Think hes ok#hes super weird about that stuff. but the guys just do their best to respect his wishes no matter how odd
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i wish i had never been born but other than that i'm taking things well i think ❤️
#suicidal ideation tw#this is mainly a joke im not fr depressed or suicidal abt breaking up w a guy after 3 weeks#just feels like there's no hope for love in my life now more than ever before and life is so hard in general#and i would never ever harm myself bc i wouldnt put my family through that and life is a precious gift etc#but dang i wish i wasn't here rn sometimes#anyway goodnight#im fr okay it was a tbought that crossed my mind but im not serious lol 😂#this is ok to rb im not actually in crisis lol#this has been a shitpost#i am generally taking it well actually#possibly bc im delulu hoping wr get back together but i can also recognize the issues in the relationship and almost broke it off myself#the night before#tbh i might not get back together with him if the opportunity presents itself bc i'm not convinced it's just a timing issue#as far as the issues go the timing is the only one i cant live with but it would pass#the other stuff i could live with but if he cant then those things aren't going away so its for the best but i think he's wrong#two people dont need to share all the same interests and passions in order to work as long as they're willing to grow together and i was#so idk its his loss really#but also living is so hard and dating is literally hell get me out of hereeeee#i felt this way BEFORE him and then i had a little glimmer of hope like oh wait love is real i could def fall for this guy#and now it's bleaker than ever before#but at least i know i'm capable of love ig 😒
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traitor to the cause forgets national holiday every year KILL HIM
#just realized i wrote may instead of marsh lmao. fuck it#trans day of visibility#trans day of eating food#tdov#tdov 2024#transgender day of visibility#trans#transgender#lgbt#gay#my art#another year eh#still in pretransition purgatory (get me tf out!!!)#idk man past year's been bad. last time i showered was july i'm goin 9 months strong 9 months weak 9 months decrepit#i manage to go through the motions with not much else in the way of progress. eat sleap shit piss rinse reuse recycle#trans day of eating food is shaky too this year. just found out yesterday i can't eat a snack anymore that i've liked since i was a kid#discovered a new love for green beans though. everything in balance#with my living situation getting more unsafe i've been thinking a lot about asking my neighbor if i can stay with him and his family#cause i don't like... see people other than them anymore so i don't know anyone else i can ask lol#and maybe i can get my shit together and start transitioning if i get out..... it's the least i need to do anyways#at least i gotta ask if he would be willing to oversee my funeral in the event of it cause i do nnnnot trust my next of kin with that shit#go watch youtube “Protecting Trans Bodies in Death” by Caitlin Doughty. contains important info for anyone really but#especially so for the titular transengendered individual#write your will... OK?#it doesn't have to be a bummer do it with a friend make it a girls night boys night hotties sleepover#death mention cw#wish i had more to say on the topic this year that wasn't a downer. i'll see what the next year holds#and hey... if a guy like me isn't giving up a motherfucker like you sure as hell shouldn't... adios & bon voyage my compatriots. SALUTE
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stooooooop ur bird facts are giving me crazy bo thoughts but specifically the dyeing feathers to be more gender affirming. immediately started thinking abt birddaughter already doing a form of this and that by extension birdperson's far duller plummage could even make him read as gnc among birdpeople....
UEAHHH DEFINITELY W BIRDDAUGHTER. also yessss i do think personallllyyyy theres a lot to b said abt how bp doesnt fit neatly into bird culture anyways like REGARDLESS of being trans … it depends on how you interpret the culture but tbh id definitely consider bp to be gnc in some form ….
#also much to be said abt his atypical family … hm#oohhhhh birdworld how i desire to know you more …#interesting also that technically all three times he parts ways w rick can be tied back to .. bird cultureee#first time pretty explicitly he misses home and specifically like. the music i think. i forget#second time. is moreso his own values clashing w ricks but like … where do those values come from. and thinkin abt his chat w morty#abt how abandoning his home (and rick) wld be a dick move#and then most recnetly he leaves to go after his family#hmmm. reaching but idgaf#i have aoooo many bird thoughts ..#TALKING ABT BIRDRICK A SEC this is why i go fucking crazyyyy over them like early on where they dont know the like gendered shit of each ot#others culture. like rick doesnt know that male birdppl r supposed to be like x and and bp doesnt know male humans r supposed to be liek y#and they dont gaf!!!!!!!#sigh …. wish i cld be in space free of human expectations ………. lol#ok idk if i sound stupid in the tags LOL i keep forgetting what ive written im. on mobile whatever#asks
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they really got reporter aoki in my fuckin movie i cant believe this
#snap chats#assembling my rgg live action cast at this point i already got sayama and makimura I Think who else can i get#i am watching Another ttm movie hi. i watched Dont Cry Mr Ogre last night and thought it was cute as a baseball enjoyer#now im watching Wish because i love crime </3 really love this movie so far tho....#it really is doin a good job highlighting what it's like for families involved with crime cases and what they have to go through#but i cant focus on the ploot cause everytime this dweebs on screen i have to cackle#ok im continuing the movie now BYE
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Yesterday was at my uncles renewal of their vows (they got quietly married just last year & yesterday was a big joint ceremony with another couple they're friends with) & my brother and I hadn't seen them since we were too little to remember well and I'm still like riding the high of it tbh. Augh. Gay people. Middle aged happy gay people. Gay people in our family accepted by our family being accepted into our family. Clutches my head
#not 100% accepted like my uncles daughter from his previous marriage stopped being ok with it once they got married#even though the two of them had been together since she was like 12. thats the one that rlly boggles the mind and breaks the heart#even so my uncles still invited her and their GRANDSON she wont let them see. she didnt come ofc. but god damn#on the one hand wish they wouldnt extend her that grace on the other hand how couldnt they.#anyways anyways point is they are so awesome and it was beautiful and made me so happy#and theyre wanting to start organizing yearly family reunions so we dont all go so long w/out seeing eachother#really nice. very excited
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actually now that i think ab it johnny wouldn’t get pissy over vic’s driving. he strikes me as a joyride kinda guy. i’m like 100% sure he grew up around a bunch of car rednecks with these crazy ass hotrods in the 90s, then hotrod culture died down, then he got to NC and lo and behold it’s fuckin flourishing
#johnny silverhand#vanta rambles#source: both halves of my family have car rednecks#they regale me with tales of street racing and souping up these beautiful cars in the 80s#i think partly the 90s too#there was such a rich and vibrant road culture back then in FL and i’m kinda sad it’s all been sterilized#good to be safe on the road but ykwim#it’s like the death of malls to me……#the proximity of the cyberpunk setting to the 80s is what makes this whole thing work#ok i’m gonna ramble more ab florida roads hi guys#there’s also more ppl here than ever (Stop it. Don’t move here! It tooootally sucks!)#so it’s just untenable to do some crazy shit on the road like u could 30 years ago#i can’t even pull out of my neighborhood without having to play fuckin frogger waiting for the right moment to go#even going out the BACK is rough#if it was as quiet here now as it was when my parents moved to this neighborhood we wouldn’t have a problem#now literally the car line for the elementary school reaches our neighborhood AND ppl park in our neighborhood to pick up their kids#WHICH IS EXPLICITLY NOT ALLOWED#anyway. point is god i wish the roads down here weren’t a fuckin nightmare#driving is fun and i like it even if it exhausts the hell outta me#wouldn’t be so exhausting if all the dang ol orange groves weren’t squashed to make way for subdivision no. 287
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idk what my father thought the take-away would be by taking my brother & i downtown to look at homeless people every holiday and birthday growing up was. like all it’s turned into was ‘communism = good’ & 🤝 like 😭😭
#diary#‘rhat could easily be u one day’ ‘one accident is all it takes’ then to the -> ‘we will kick u out if u do something we don’t like’ -> im#poor & therefore the poor is me ALSKALSKALKSLAKS#like idk. i mean i’ve been thinking abt it so much like how things could’ve been different if only money weren’t a problem#like yea he grew up basically homeless so i understand what his point ? was i guess ? but idk like the looming ‘u can be kicked out’ had#been held over me since i realized my faggotry at like 7/8 like ALSKALSKALSKLAKS#i didn’t have money ? i was a child ? i couldn’t afford things ? but also the money i did have was from work i’d do around the house or#whatever like if we got birthday money like 80% would go into a savings account but i didn’t have access to that account until i turned like#17 so like still its not like it was MY money - all my money was what i had or what i could hide or stash like#the HOARDING#JUST IN CASE I GOT FOUND OUT#maybe this was really unhealthy#but REGARDLESS it’s like ok idk the class solidarity but HE doesn’t like the homeless now bc he’s a crotchety old man that was a child of#neoliberal capitalism so i mean yea idk i get it but MY generation like my brother & i - or at least I REALIZED THIS - but like the flourish#that my father received from the economy he came of age into is NOT being passed along to me like im just floundering i keep thinking abt#money like im so fucking stressed all the time abt MONEY like i RESENT it so much like i WISH i could’ve been born into wealth like just#be NORMAL have a NORMAL college like be able to GET A LOAN at ALL for school loans but#like even if i COULD get a loan it’s not like i’d be able to PAY IT BACK !!!!! like oh my god ? & then who’d end up having to figure out how#to pay it back ? my family bc .. gov gon get their money somehow & i can’t do that even if i DID get kicked out like#im just so envious of the wealthy; those who could pay their way - or get it covered#like literally ‘what’re u going to do :)’ bro i don’t FUCKING KNOW DO U HAVE MONEY FOR ME TO DO ANYTHING ? BC WORKING FOR 30K/YEAR IS MORE#like time available to look for Real work vs Working at Work like it’s MORE affordable to NOT work#what’s the POINT if fucking WALMART pays MORE THAN A DEGREED REQUIREMENT#like 😭😭😭😭😭#cost of living crisis ever rising#like ok let’s just#im going to light things on fire
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collection of my absolute favorite tags from this incredible post:
Candace and doofenshmirtz would be tumblr mutuals i think
#my personal take is that phineas would have a blog dedicated to advertising his latest invention so everyone can come check it out#and ferb would have a blog for the same purpose except he just silently reblogs all of phineas's posts with the occasional thumbs up emoji#candace constantly tries to show the posts to their mom and either#1) she goes “oh those boys and their imagination” because she thinks they're inviting their friends over for make-believe games#or 2) tumblr staff nukes their posts for promoting dangerous activities / self doxxing#“aren't you a little young to be inviting strangers to your house to *checks post* test the zoning law breaking DIY water slide you built?”#perry doesn't have a blog he just lurks on doof's to check up on his evil schemes#but his family runs an in-character pet blog where they put him in silly hats and make him say cute but wildly out of character things#somehow avoiding The Hat#and doof follows that blog because aww cute little harmless platapus#major monogram occasionally posts angsty vents about The Academy while every teen on the site begs him to get therapy instead#carl is a reddit infiltrator and everyone hates him. im sorry carl fans(???) but you actually cant debate me on this im right#OH AND LAWRENCE#HE ABSOLUTELY IS THE FATHER OF TUMBLR AND EVERYONE ADORES HIM#he posts about how much he loves his wife and kids in between rambles about his special interests (fossils dun dun dun)#i just know he's the babygirl of tumblr in his universe and candace probably hates it but secretly thinks its sweet that everyone loves him#he'll just go “ah candace look! ive received another 'note'! i do wish i could figure out how to write one back”#sorry i went off on a lawrence tangent i unironically love that man#SORRY ONE MORE I JUST THOUGHT OF I SWEAR IM DONE AFTER THIS#buford runs a baljeet hate blog and constantly receives anons begging him to just ask him out already#he hates it but is VERY CAREFUL to explain he isn't homophobic and actually belives that homophobia is an evil and unjust philosophy#that goes against the Bullies Code of Ethics or some shit#anyway when theyre in high school he finally makes a post like “yeah ok whatever we're dating now im still gonna bully him tho”#and tumblr loses their collective minds for like a week#this may be the most tags ive ever put on anything i am currently unmedicated and pnf was my entire childhood ok
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