#and while i am indeed very happy for those who are getting to win

[saltpepperbeard]

*raking hands down face* when will it be Our Turn :)

[alpaca-clouds]

The Inner Contradition of Capitalism

Okay, let me talk about something that I took away from several books I have read during the last few months: Capitalism is shitty.

"No shit," you might say. "You needed to read a book for that?"

No, of course I knew that before. I knew before that capitalism is shitty for about 90% of people who have to live under it - and of course for the environment as well. There is a reason I am an anarcho communist and Solarpunk.

However, there is another thing about this: Capitalism is shitty, even for those who are "winning it". While there is very little resaerch on the mental health of the super rich, because most of them obviously do not want to participate in this research, there were some very, very few of them allowed research to happen. And here is the thing: There is some evidence that if you acquire riches to a certain point you might actually get better. You are gonna be a bit less stressed and worried until you reach that point.

But "that point" is actually fairly low - from modern capitalism's point of view. While the few papers existing on it might disagree, but generally speaking it is somewhere between 1 and 3 million. Basically it is the kind of money, where you actually can live just from the money you already have, as long as you do not live in abundance and just relax into a normal lifestyle, rahter than getting a villa and yacht.

But here is the thing: As soon as you are richer than that, research suggests, you will actually get more and more miserable.

Now, again, we just have very little in terms of multimillionaires, yet alone billionaires, who will allow for psychologists and neurologists to actually do studies on this. So we have very few data points from where to extrapolate.

But what we have greatly suggests that the more money they get, the more unhappy and more angry they become.

Additionally there is quite a lot of research that suggests that there is indeed a particular personality profile, that will get into those positions. And that personality profile actually has probably also to do a lot with previous abuse.

Don't get me wrong: I absolutely deteste billionaires. I think they are the source for a lot of the ills in our world. They are horrible humans with so much blood on their fingers. However... In some regards I also pity them. Because if you look at them, you do know that... they are not actually happy, are they?

Will they try to tell you they are? Absolutely. But they are not. They are unhappy, and more than anything they are driven by the fear to lose the stuff they have. Because they know how easy that is - and fear how miserable they could be.

And sure, they will claim how much they work and how great they are for it - because we have this idea of meritocracy in our heads. But... That is also bullshit, and they do kinda know it.

As I wrote about yesterday, I have recently read the non-fiction book "The Dawn of Everything", and within the book there are actually quite a few examples of people, who during earlier times of colonization and the conflicts between indigenous people and colonizers, had been kidnapped and taken as hostage by the indigenous. And... a lot of them were freed, only to return and realize, that the life of the indigenous people was just a whole lot better. And quite a few of these hostages decided on their own will to return living with the indigenous people who had taken them hostage.

And yes, in one case this included one of the superrich at the time.

And this to me is the thing: Capitalism as it is, does not make anyone happy. There really are no winners here. There are only losers. No matter who, everyone is worse of because of it. There is nobody here, who might be profiting. Even those who seem to be profiting are actually for the most part miserable.

I honestly do wonder a lot, why this even could happen. It is a question that the book poses a lot, it never finds an answer. Because technically humans were always more intelligent than this. We were more intelligent than creating society in a way that most of us were so darn unhappy.

We talk so much about the "winners" of capitalism. But the truth is, that they do not exist. Because from what little data we have, there is actually good indication, that those who "won capitalism" and truly gave away most of that money (rather than just putting it into a self-controlled trust), were the only ones who became happy.

[patibato]

[Bitter Sweet Sixteen] 002-B01 - The Hateful Five

Female Student A: Oh, ufufufu! Just what I'd expect from you, Yumenosuke-san! Sharp, smart, athletic, and funny to boot.

Female Student B: I'm so happy we can spend time together in mahorova like this.

Yumenosuke: I'm also honoured to be able to talk with delightful ladies such as yourselves. It's a shame that, due to me being at my villa in Switzerland, the metaverse is our only way to meet, but… well, there's only about half of Summer Vacation left.

Next on the agenda is how to make the best use of the remaining time—let's have an open discussion about it!

Female Student A: Sounds good to me! By the way, what are your plans?

Yumenosuke: I completed all my assignments in the first week, so in the remaining time, I think I'll put all my efforts towards ensuring the success of the open days we'll be holding at the end of the month.

Female Student B: Oh my! That's wonderful! We should learn from you.

Female Student A: We should. I've just been obsessed with the "LashColle" releases lately…

Yumenosuke: LashColle… "Eyelash Collection", you mean? Unfortunately, I'm rather unfamiliar with the eyelash world, so I appear to be falling behind.

However, I believe the top LashColle award from the other day was acquired by my Uncle, with an overwhelming point difference, yes?

Gannosuke: Indeed, along with one of the audience awards.

A pleasure to meet you, lovely young ladies. I am Yumenosuke's Uncle, Kuraku Gannosuke.

Female Student B: I was wondering who the mysterious gentleman next to Yumenosuke-san was… so you're that renowned eyelash artist?

Female Student A: Congratulations on your winnings! Your work was the boldest, most radiantly decadent one of them all…!

Female Student B: So true. On top of that… it felt a little different to your usual style!

Yumenosuke: Huh… has there been a change in your mental state or something?

Gannosuke: Well, the other day I had a once in a lifetime encounter on the island. There's no doubt that he sparked a flame in my imagination.

Yumenosuke: Oh! That's wonderful to hear. I wonder, just what kind of encounter was it—

Student Council Member: President Kuraku!

Yumenosuke: What is it? Quiet down.

Student Council PR: It's serious! Please look at this news!

Yumenosuke: …!? "Active High Schoolers Recruited as Tourism Ward Mayors"…!?

Student Council PR: What's more, while this hasn't been announced yet, my mother who works with the news says the ones nominated are—…

Female Student A: Of all people, it's those lowly Rank One students who may have blown up the old school building…!? Aah, I'm getting dizzy…!

Female Student B: A-are you alright, Yumenosuke-san? You've gone pale…

Yumenosuke: …Kh!

(Ward Mayors have a lot of influence over the political world, and despite knowing that, the Ward 0 Mayor chose THEM? In the first place, it's clear this personnel decision was enforced without proper consideration… an unacceptable folly!)

(What's more, being a Ward Mayor…! It's the position that I should have been inaugurated into in "Kuraku Yumenosuke's Life Plan Chapter 3 ~Tourism Ward Mayor Edition~"…!)

(Surely those savages responsible for the bombing incident took the positions with no great effort involved—absolutely unforgivable! How dare they do this to my perfect life plan… how dare they…-)

Gannosuke: Are you alright, Yumenosuke-kun?

Yumenosuke: … Excuse me. I have some business to attend to, so I shall take my leave now!

Gannosuke: …

Momiji: Everyooone! The press release is ouuut!

Akuta: Ooh! For real!? Can I see~~~?

Nanaki: Oi, Akuta. Sit properly while you eat.

Ushio: Hmm… this celebration* soba is pretty good.

Muneuji: Indeed. I'm sure even my mother, who's very particular about Japanese food, would choose to eat this 100% buckwheat soba.

*slurping*

Kiroku: … Slurp…

Akuta: Uuum, "Actibb high shkoowers~"…

Yachiyo: Ah, should I read it out? Since everyone's busy eating…

Renga: That's thoughtful of you. —Hey, you guys, hand it over.

Momiji: Sorry, Yachiyo-kun. Please go ahead!

Yachiyo: "Active High Schoolers Unexpectedly Chosen for Wards 5-9 in the Hama Special Tourism Ward"

Liguang: … …

Yachiyo: "Aiming to incorporate a new sense of values into Hama's tourism based on the younger generation, who bear the burden of the future—"

"We are pleased to announce that active high schoolers have been inaugurated into the position of Tourism Ward Mayors for Wards 5-9 under the orders of Ward 0 Mayor and Hama Tours President, Oguro Kafka."

Yukikaze: …

Yachiyo: "As with the tour held by R1ze—the Mayors of Wards 0-4—which concluded to high acclaim the other day, their upcoming first tour will include a Hospitality Live."

"And this time, there'll also be an inauguration ceremony held on the first day, making this a tour packed with events."

"Furthermore, it will be held at their school building, one of the symbols of Hama—"

Ten: This soba's good.

Yachiyo: "Hama Asunaro High School, in collaboration with the open days being held."

"It will be a tour that can be enjoyed by not only the prospective students and their guardians, but the general public as well, so please rouse yourselves to take part, everyone."

—Done!

Momiji: The press release really does make it hit home and get you motivated.

Akuta: A Hospitality Live for the tour…! Just hearing that gets me going all of a sudden~~~!

Liguang: Don't shake the table, boy.

Nanaki: Ah, sorry, I'll scold him later.

Renga: But you know, feeling excited for it is… well, I understand it. But what will you do about the contents? Your concept is important.

Kiroku: …The… concept… …

Ushio: Our dear Idiotake-san, how's that coming along?

Akuta: Nghe?

Muneuji: Thinking up the concept is the leader's role. Do you have anything in mind?

Renga: W-wait! Students. —I appreciate that you guys don't know up from down when it comes to making plans.

If you're struggling, I could deign to lend a hand—

Akuta: Ac-tua-lly, I DO have a proper plan!

Renga: Wh—

Liguang: Patronising them is futile.

Ten: Isn't it nice that they won't be taking up any of your time, Renga-san?

Renga: …- Y-yeah, right.

Momiji: —Alright, if we're finished with the soba, let's get on with the rest of the moving process!

All Five: Got it.

Nanaki: So the room arrangements have me, Akuta, and Kiroku rooming together.

Akuta: The room's called "Coil" huh. We should think up a coiled pose later.

Kiroku: … Hm…

Momiji: Are you fine with this room arrangement, Ushio-kun?

Ushio: Can't complain about rooming with Muneuji. The name, on the other hand…

Muneuji: "Whinny Clan" is an interesting one. Shall we devise a Whinny Clan pose later?

Momiji: (The former inn does have weird room names…)

Nanaki: We should finish carrying in our luggage now. Let's go Akuta, Kiroku.

Kiroku: Mhm…

Ushio: … …

Yukikaze: Why are you scowling at your phone? Have you finished putting away your luggage?

Ushio: Elevator's full so I'm waiting for it to be empty. Gotta use that spare time to ego-search that news from earlier.

Yep, there's the slander. Reported.

Yukikaze: …

Ushio: …You think what I'm doing is pointless, don't you? So do I. It doesn't really matter.

Yukikaze: No, it's not pointless. I'll help.

Ushio: … Idle curiosity, huh.

Momiji: (It's not out of curiosity, it's out of kindness. Ushio-kun…)

Muneuji: Uuchan, step aside a bit. I want to put this there.

Momiji: Woah! That bag looks super heavy…!

Yukikaze: How grand. …It doesn't look like a piece of furniture.

Kafka: Amazing, right? It's full of congratulatory gifts sent by Muneuji's family.

Momiji: Wow~! It's got everything from high class sweets to electric appliances!

Kafka: Looks like we won't need to worry about equipment for a while. There's even tea cakes for tea time with Chief-chan.

Akuta: Lured by the presence of food, I have arrived from the second floor!

Ushio: Are you a dog…?

Akuta: Can I have this gold leaf castella? Ah, if I gather up the gold leaves, will I become rich?

Momiji: Ahaha, I wonder.

Ten: What's your home like, Akuta? Your family must be happy to hear you're a Ward Mayor.

Akuta: Nyah, my uncle's holed up at work so we've not had a proper talk yet. Nom nom…

Momiji: Your uncle?

Akuta: He's an animation director, Isotake Taiji. He's been looking after me.

Momiji: Is that so…

Ten: Isotake Taiji's a pretty famous animator. And even if he wasn't, people working in animation have it hard.

Momiji: (There goes Ten-kun…! Splendidly moving past the complicated circumstances and continuing the conversation…!)

(Come to think of it, the family member who signed the letter of consent for the trip was his uncle, wasn't it.)

(I wasn't going to touch on it, but—I see, that was why.)

Renga: Oh, Akuta! You're here! I was looking for you!

Akuta: Mgh?

Renga: A-about your concept! Earlier, I wondered if you were bluffing in front of everyone… I understand that too, or like…

A concept isn't something you can put together so easily! So I, the leader of the Morning Team, shall-

Akuta: Nah, I'm good. But thanks for the thought, Renga-san.

! Nanaki and Kiroku have come back at just the right time.

Hey, gentlemen of Asu-High! Attentiii~~~~on! Please gather here tomorrow!

Renga: …Uu.

Akuta: I'll be announcing the best, most powerful concept to render the guys who treated us like idiots speechless!

Renga: I-I… can lend… my knowledge…

Momiji: (I'll console him later…)

*"引っ越しそば" (hikkoshi soba) is soba eaten to celebrate a successful move. It's traditionally given by neighbours, but in recent years has become something eaten regardless

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Masterlist

[keruimi]

In a Heartbeat

Pairing: Hirugami Sachiro x reader

Warnings: Angst, Comfort, a few spoilers in his past.

Note: My mind is very jumbled when I wrote this but I hope you all still can understand. This is part 2 of my "The Consequences of my Ignorance" but in Hirugami's Perspective. Hope you enjoy it!

_____________________________

It was late evening during our time in Tokyo for a National Tournament held in March.

The night I went outside to take fresh air, because the pressure of winning started to overwhelm me even though I am not the one playing in the court.

It was the time I realized how truly suffocating volleyball is.

That thought was immediately cut off when my eyes caught a silhouette of a woman sitting at the entryway of the stadium.

I looked around and noticed she was alone, wearing a familiar uniform of Inarizaki Highschool.

The closer I walked to her, I heard the faint sound of kittens that made me finally notice a litter of it around her.

I took one when it approached me and in a second, she looked behind her that connected our gazes at each other.

"Good Evening, do you mind If I join you?" I smiled at her so she nodded that made me sit beside her and finally realized she is feeding a smaller kitten compared to the few I saw.

We sat in silence as I played with the other kittens.

"You're one of Kamomedai's middle blockers" I was about to start a conversation when she suddenly spoke up first.

"Yes, I guess you're one of the Inarizaki supporters. They have a match right now" I informed her while I look down at a kitten that playfully bit my thumb.

"They can handle that"

I looked at her who was gently putting a kitten to sleep while covering it with her jacket.

It was an adorable sight to see.

"You seem to be fond of cats" I decided to change the topic when I realized that talking about volleyball is something she doesn't want to talk about.

And I am glad.

"Yes, so badly that I wanted to study at Nekoma" she took another kitten to feed when the previous one finally fell asleep.

"Then why didn't you?"

I saw a flash of sadness in her eyes as she made a new bottle of milk for the kitten.

"Because I don't want to be lonely"

She chose to look at me as she gave me a light hearted smile.

"Playing volleyball seems nice isn't it? It's a sport where you know you will have someone. You will never get lonely" she said, followed by a sigh.

"Yet I can't fall in love with the sport" she looks ahead of us as I didn't remove my gaze on her side view.

It seems like she has something in mind that she wants to let out.

With a buzzing stadium filled with excitement and happiness. A peaceful air where you can state your worry is something I didn't ask for but my mind badly needed it.

"I don't understand why anyone would put their hearts and mind in a sport that can make you question your worth, make you feel not good enough at all." She stated as I heard the kitten she is taking care of, purr in content as she continues caressing the little animal.

"With thought in mind, I wonder if everyone who plays volleyball really loves it or just plays the sport because that's where they are talented. That's where they are gifted." She continued speaking her thoughts out that made me lift a small smile.

With just one encounter, she expressed herself to a complete stranger.

"Why did Hirugami start playing volleyball? Is it because you need to be like your family? Or is it because you really love the sport like they do? Is it for self-validation or passion? Those are the thoughts that I heard from other people" I chuckled when I heard her talk about my life.

Questions where I already have my answers. The view of others is not technically wrong.

I played volleyball because that's where my family is good at, because I was gifted with the talent that I can use in the sport.

It was to prove to myself that I am worthy to be part of that successful family. A talent that can prove I am indeed a Hirugami.

Yet those questions reminded me of how cruel I was with myself before.

It was me who pressured myself back then.

"I don't love volleyball. With that sentence, I'm sure those three questions are already answered" I saw how her hands stop caressing the kitten who seems to be dozing off already.

"Do you hate volleyball?"

"Not really. But I don't love it like those said prodigies" I told her as I removed my jacket to make a nest for the kittens that are already starting to sleep.

"Let me take them" I cut the topic about volleyball as I gently took the sleeping ones to the nest so she can move easily without waking them up.

I never saw someone this gentle with animals.

And I know how soft I can get for those types of people.

"So you are playing to be with them?" It seemed like a question but we both knew that we were aware of the answer to it.

"Yes, if a person doesn't love volleyball, there can be another reason like friends and hobbies. You don't always need to love it for you to do it" I look at the litter of sleeping kittens that warmed my heart a little.

I love animals the most. And seeing her take care of them with great care and gentleness, made an unknown emotion stirred in my heart.

It was the moment I started to admire her.

"If you don't love volleyball, why did you travel all the way to Hyogo just to support them? When I feel like you know they will win?" It was time to know her.

And I was thankful I questioned her.

"My boyfriend is playing, that's why"

Thankful because I already knew the answer if I tried to get a closer bond with her.

It was a reminder to never hope anymore. That I can only have this woman as a friend.

Nothing more than that.

"Then why are you not there?" Questions continue to appear in my mind and it seems like my second question brought back the sad gaze I first saw in her eyes.

"Because my presence wouldn't change anything. I don't see any worth watching him play"

"But that's your boyfriend"

"And? I don't need to always support him" she cut me off immediately that made me press my lips to a line.

I don't want to push her to her limits.

It can be a reason why she wants to be alone outside the stadium to think her mind through it.

"Since he was never there for me anyway"

Like a challenge she can't get over with.

"I tried to be a better partner so he can give me the attention I need. But no matter how hard I tried, it will just be a temporary feeling of admiration." She continued as I saw how her eyes started to get glossy under the moonlight.

"The feeling of everyone's pity gazes scared me. Because my nightmare became a reality" she chuckled as she look away to not show how a tear fell on her eyes.

"It feels like everyone got tired of me"

"Because of his actions, my mind became my own enemy. I started to hate myself, push myself to my limits just so I can catch up with him" she breathlessly muttered before she laid on the concrete floor beside the place where I put my jacket with sleeping kittens on it.

My eyes followed her movement as she gaze at sky above us.

"But thinking right now, it feels like it was alright to be lonely. The time where I feel like I can finally understand the world around me."

"The time where I comforted myself because no one is there to do it for me. That even I expressed the pain in the presence of a stranger" she lifted a small smile.

"It was stupid but refreshing"

It was the moment that made me feel miserable. Because no one came to her life just to save her.

One of the moments where I became thankful that Korai chose to approach me when I reached my breaking point.

If it weren't for him lending his presence to talk to me, I wouldn't have made it.

He unknowingly became the person who help me get through it when I feel like I am drowning.

When I already started break, he is the one who rescued me.

"I berated myself because I thought I failed in volleyball." That made me want to open myself like she did.

Because she chose to trust me.

There were no underlying intention about it, I just simply want to help her get through it like I did.

If I am saved, why can't she?

"Until he arrive to my life and gave me a choice whether to stay or leave. Because no matter what I chose, myself is the most important thing"

Our gaze met again and I felt how my heart warmed with the thought of how we look right now.

Of how we interact right now.

"If you're tired, you can rest. If you don't want to stay, you can leave. You don't always need to adjust for the sake of others" I told her as I lent her my scarf when I noticed how her lips started to tremble.

"Hearing your thoughts, you are really tired of trying to understand the world around you. Creating more complicated decisions for you to choose."

Being alone is the only way where she can clear her thoughts.

With animals around her, they unknowingly became her home.

And it was a sight I don't want to see when I look at her.

"You know, taking a break is not wrong. Because if you didn't, the more you move forward with your situation right now, sooner or later, you will break too and it would be harder to pull through"

"Choosing to cherish yourself is better than losing who you are for somebody else" I move closer to her until I am beside her.

"Don't you think?" I suddenly felt her body close to mine as I felt her tears fall on my shoulder that made my eyes glossy too.

"We would be strangers after this. So feel free to let yourself out."

Because I would sure stay to hear you out.

It was wrong. Letting her seek comfort with another man when she is in a relationship.

But at this time, no one is willing to listen other than me, a person who doesn't know the things she is getting through.

It's for the better, because after this, we would be strangers. Strangers who are aware of the past we have gone through.

We were strangers who went through the same thing.

And that made my heart feel closer to hers.

That I hope there will be more memories of us after this night.

Because I started to want to be beside her. Just so she can have a person to run to.

Even if it feels wrong with our status.

Time passed by and I found her sleeping on my shoulder that lifted a small smile on my lips.

"Oi Hirugami" Followed by my friend's voice that made me look behind us and saw my team, especially the bewilderment look in Korai's face.

"You-" our captain immediately put his hand over my loud friend's mouth before he woke up the woman peacefully sleeping on me.

"Would you go back to the hotel with us?" The captain asked, that made me chuckle and shook my head.

"We'll head first then, call us when you arrive at the lobby"

I nod before he push my friend who was still processing the scene before throwing a look at me that made me playfully wink at him.

I don't want this moment to end yet. But moments like this tend to be shorter than how I wanted.

I gently shake the woman that made her stirred awake.

"Let's go back to your hotel now. You might get sick the longer we stay here" she nod in her drowsy state before I slowly put the kittens in my back as she fixed her hair.

She chose to walk towards her hotel, as I observed how she tried to stay warm in her clothing that put a smile on my lips.

We stop by in a shop for a while to buy a basket for the kittens to sleep in. Yet she stepped outside with a warm coffee in hand.

She silently gave me the cups before gently transferring the kitten from my bag to the basket she bought, where she already placed a soft cloth.

The longer I watched her be gentle to other creatures, the more I felt these forbidden feelings turned bigger.

Liking her is not hard at all.

And I silently yearn for our next meeting when she finally disappears from my sight after giving me a thankful smile.

I arrived back at the hotel our team was staying at with a coffee in hand.

The moment I entered the room, the team sitting in the living room was the one that greeted me with a mumbling Korai who seemed to be cursing me under his breath.

"Who was that?" He asked me immediately as I removed my jacket before taking a sip of coffee.

She has great taste.

"I didn't get her name"

"What?" He seemed to get more irritated at my answer that made me shrug my shoulder before taking a seat in the last seat in the room.

"Having a moment under the moon it's closer to romantic. I doubt you don't know her" a senior of mine teased that made me chuckle at him.

"We are really strangers. I approached her because she is taking care of some kittens"

"Typical Hirugami"

"One way to Hirugami's heart is through animals" they joked but I know that she really took my heart with her.

Because of that one encounter, I fell in love with her.

No matter how forbidden it feels like.

I closed my eyes when my mind started getting worked up again.

After this, she will want to act like nothing happened between the two of us, like we didn't open our past to each other.

And I would gladly oblige even though I'm against it.

But my heart chose to look for her in the audience, my eyes lingering longer than they should be.

Until looking for her started to become my habit. And my heart will feel warmed when my eyes meet hers.

If she can be mine, I would never feel so lost than before.

Because of her, I started to question myself again. Maybe it was fate that she stole my heart.

It made me hope that our encounters have something to bring in my life.

Even a slight sign that she will become someone to my life, instead of just entering my mind.

I gave a smile before she looked away.

Strangers...

I need to always remind myself what I need to think of her. A word that tells me to not go further.

An encounter that shouldn't be focused on.

But I can't promise myself that.

Especially when her break up with Inarizaki's setter reaches my ears.

It comforted my heart knowing she began to choose herself. But I know I seriously need to give the space she needs so she can move on.

So I prevent myself from looking for her. Until her ex confronted me in the middle of the match.

"I lost to you again and I hate it"

Then I began to realize that she somehow mentioned me. No wonder he started to target me and my feet finally got injured because I couldn't keep up on the pressure he was giving me.

"How annoying" Korai clicked his tongue as I hissed when the manager put pressure on my sprain.

It happened when I landed on a bad footing after receiving his supposed to be jump float serve yet turn it into a jump serve.

I was lucky to not get myself injured but it threw me off guard.

And it sucked that she was the reason that made this happen.

If Atsumu only know that my love for his ex is one-sided. He might have lessen his jealousy to me.

I sighed to calm myself down when my team decided to bench me out which what Korai hated but he knew that if I keep playing, it will be worse than now.

"Goodluck" I wave off the incident knowing the man is going through something.

Targeting in a sport is normal. I can't even avoid it.

I watched my team lose against Inarizaki that stirred a feeling within me but I know this is destiny.

Since he is the one who ended up crying even though they won.

So it's 50-50 I guess.

"Let's go back here in Spring interhigh" I told them when they approached me on the sidelines with some who have glossy eyes.

I knew how big my role was in the team.

I already know the outcome if I ever get injured.

But right now, we need to accept the loss.

I watched my team eat in the restaurant until I felt something nudging my injured ankle that made me look below the table and saw a familiar kitten I took care of with her.

I took the small feline and my eyes immediately looked for her figure and saw she was already looking at me from the corner.

I excused myself from the team before I headed towards her table and stopped beside it.

"Would you mind me joining you?"

She hummed so I decided to sit in front of her and my attention went to the kittens snuggling in the basket.

"Are you planning to keep them?" I started the conversation as she took a sip of her drink before looking over at the kittens.

"Maybe..." She muttered before leaning on her seat that made me focus my attention on her.

"What is it?" I went straight to the point and sent a smile in her direction. I noticed a small faint blush in her cheeks that made my smile bigger.

"You don't need to apologize for something you didn't do" I cut her off when she seems like she is going to apologize for the things that happened a while ago in the match.

Her face turned sullen and made me smile when I read her mind.

"It was my fault for mentioning your name. I shouldn't have said that to him" she looked down on embarrassment as I nod.

But I think it's better to mention that to him. Because an untold story can be viewed differently if it weren't revealed immediately.

"It's fine"

"But he injured you" she muttered before slapping a hand on her forehead.

"It's normal in a match. We shouldn't blame anyone for it"

I don't want to blame herself again for a slight moment of losing control over their emotions.

I took a hold of her hand over the table that made her look up to me.

"It's alright. Don't hate yourself because I won't forgive you for that" I squeezed her hands that made her nod before I let go and started playing with the cats.

"What's your name? I never got to ask you" I ask her as the kitten I'm holding my head on my cheek.

"Y/n" she whispered that lifted a small smile on my lips.

"This made us acquaintances, right?"

Even if I need to start slowly. Even if I need to start at the very beginning. I'm willing.

Because it was for her.

I don't want to lose her like he did. I wanted her more than anybody did.

I would never meet someone like her who made me fall in love at first sight that I once thought never existed.

But because of her, I'm willing to give effort to the emotions called 'love'.

I did everything just to keep in contact with her, even at a far distance.

Even creating a schedule on when I can disturb her just so we won't lose touch with each other.

It was easier when she chose to spend time with me so she could move on. At least even in call, the presence still help her feel like she was not alone.

Even if we need to go through the phase of friendship. Even if it take two years maximum, I'll do my best so she can learn to love me too.

Despite of her fear on love because of her first time, I'm willing to repeat the same words all over again.

Willing to travel the country with just one call. Willing to do something I haven't done before because she loves it.

Even if I start at the beginning, I'll make sure our ending is the one I wanted.

The last day of my first year in Spring interhigh.

Is the beginning of my story...

Where I met my first love

[balrogballs]

Have you been working all the time when writing? I was thinking a book advance is like a salary you get paid, but is it not really that much to make a living? Does it vary between genre or is it a standard price? Btw, your job sounds so awesome too

I'm apologizing again for all the questions, and love u for answering them all, I'm an aspiring novelist and nobody I know in real life knows I want to write for a living. I'm very grateful for your lists last week as well.

No problem, happy to help!

Keeping the answer under the cut though, since IDK if ppl who followed balrogballs for elrond reasons want to hear balrogballs go on about the publishing industry LMAO

Working/Writing:

I have indeed worked throughout my writing career, though for most of the first book writing time I was finishing my PhD. Most authors work on the side, unless you reach absolutely top level and can coast off royalties and speaker fees etc.

Eg. I was at an event where Rushdie gave the keynote, and overheard his rate for the evening was around 55K USD. The vast majority of writers will never pull those figures — the highest I've ever been paid to do a talk was £1.5k, and that was a one off and probably won't happen again.

Put it this way, I know a Booker winner and a Nobel winner personally, both wins in the last 5 years, and both worked part time as university professors till the win. Living off writing is very difficult in the traditional publishing sense unless you hit a certain level of success.

And thank you for your nice words about my job — I do enjoy it and it's very fulfilling, and means I have a ton of free time when I'm not posted overseas so I have ample time to write (and can fuck about on here lol).

Advance

Take anything I say here with a pinch of salt, as this varies tremendously due to a ton of different factors including genre, publisher, location, market etc.

The advance isn't paid like a salary, it's paid in chunks. For me, I had it in 4 lots across around 2 years. So that method of payment means it's not feasible to use as salary.

Keep in mind, you're not paid while you write your second book — only once it sells will you get the second advance, so again, the 'gaps' need to be covered. I took around a year to write the second one and sent the draft manuscript in June to my agent for edits, and it'll only go to the publishers early next year. So thats a lot of time w/o steady income.

How much it is can vary immensely — mine was around double my general salary. I got very lucky in that the book went to auction and my agent is an outstanding negotiator, so the bidding contributed to the final sum. But yes, it varies based on a ton of different factors.

You don't get the full amount btw, it's taxable income + the agency will take a cut. High advances are also a double edged sword, however - you need to "earn them out" before you get any royalties. For instance, I had a great signing advance, but this means there's no chance I ever see any royalties.

So again, that means no income at all when writing the second thing.

It's not an issue in litfic since literally nobody earns out unless you get one of the biggest prizes, though am not sure about other genres. But yes, big advance = much longer wait for royalties, and royalties themselves aren't normally very much either, so keep that in mind when thinking of salaries etc.

Social Profile

I'll answer your other question re: whether social media and public profile is beneficial for a writer here just to not clog ppls feeds. Prior to querying, only if you're writing a non fiction book will your social following actually matter, as you are very much part of the "package deal".

In fiction, it matters much less. Cassandra Claire trajectories are very rare, and whilst Booktoker book deals have happened, again they have VERY large followings to the point that they are part of the product itself.

Whether it's important after publishing, I'm not sure. My agent says no, but equally, others say yes.

Some authors are very active on SM, but equally many others I know are like me in that they have an anon profile somewhere but nothing identifiable. Eg. w. me, I don't have any socials other than this and won't be getting any — a publicist handles the official accounts so I can be unhinged here in peace and not worry about accidentally tweeting about balrog testicle LMAOOO 🙏

Hope this has helped ✨

[fuckyeahhowardstark]

I just got the third part of the wartime epistolary fic by @ruquas in the form of handwritten letters between Bucky and Howard! This is a fill for @marveltrumpshate 2023.

Part 1 -- Part 2

I've included a transcript below the cut:

Page 1:

15th of Jan. 1944 Dear James, Thank you for granting me the privilege of calling you by your given name. I am happy to inform you that we are indeed headed the same way, so it might be, that I will reach you faster than this letter will. And in some way think it might be for the best. It is good to hear that Steve is well. And that he seems to enjoy it, too. I won't lie, in some ways it is a relief. Though I am sure everything is alright with that as otherwise Miss Carter would have already told us about any problems. Christmas was spent in a friendly manner at the base. Unlike you, we didn't get put with other civilians. And while this Christmas has actually been more pleasant than some I had to endure in the past, I do find myself longing that it had been spent with you and the others. If you would be inclined to it, I would love to hear more about it in person.

Page 2:

In regards of introducing you be assured, that I will gladly do so, James. And in regards what your sister said, it is true. The soldiers are celebrated as the ones that will end this war, calling each of you a hero. Which means that you will need to fend off more than one pretty dame should I introduce you as not only a hero of war but also a member of the famous Howling Commandos. So if you are willing to risk that, I shall watch them unleash an onslaught that even Hitler and his famous SS would run from. When we will talk in person, I will show your not only the sketches, but also the final version. And I will have a word with some people about removing important information that might be crucial to winning the war. But this, as important as it is, needs to wait until after our next stop. I have heard that the Italians are even more difficult than the soldiers, but I am not below admitting that I don't want to risk more time than necessary here. Colleagues told me that in that regard, the Austrians are a lot easier to get along. Funny, if you think about

Page 3:

how divided the country must be because of it. Another rumor I have heard is, that we will be very likely to be stationed longer at the new base. I have heard rumors about some of our allies wanting to discuss more joint operations. I am very curious if this will be true as it would give us a lot more time to not only catch up but also to talk about some of your plans for the future, James. I am fully aware that you don't want to take anything too serious, which is fully understandable given the situation, but I would be more than happy to talk about those details. I also heard that some of the finer arts and wines should be available for us, so I would be more than interested in trying to teach you the difference of some of those arts that I am still sure you know more about than you will let on. Steve mentioned you going to art classes, too. Though even if we both agree to disagree again, it will be a lot more fun than I have right now

Page 4:

Who knows, maybe we will not only have the option and time for you to give me input on the new design but also for me to put together a prototype that you can test out. And while we are at it, we might even have time for the promised shooting sessions. And please, if you allow me to call you James, I would love it, if we can be even with you calling me Howard. While I got used to the Mister Stark over the time, it will always feel like my father getting talked to, an association I would like to avoid with you. Sincerely and with high regards, Howard Stark

Insert:

To the brave soldier it concerns, we inform you that due to concerns of our all—especially your own and your fellow soldiers!—safety, all letters from and towards you will be opened -United States Department of War

Envelope:

To: Sergeant James Barnes

[merakiui]

AAAAAAHH THE SCARA FIC!!! it was so good!! the part where he's mean to us for attempting to receive help from teyvatcord rather than the internet ( ; ω ; ) and the fact u call it teyvatcord instead of discord is so cute!! honestly I feel like that small detail made me enjoy it 10x more because I'm a sucker for little canon eastereggs—and!! the harbingers and knights of favonius mention (scaras right, that name is lame!! like, who names their team 'knights of favonius') T_T sobsob <33 scara being mad at his teammates was so adorably funny hehe — that whole little segment was so funny and domestic , him mocking us and the little bickering between us <33 AND!! THE ENDING (＠_＠) don't even get me started orz.. he was surprisingly cute and somewhat nice T_T and his little ego-boost and cocky demeanor after finding out it was our first time!! (>_<) and, and!! him crying at the end aaaaa my heart orz

AND I SEE U ALREADY UPDATED UR LUNAR LOVE HOTEL M-LIST (≧▽≦)!! it's cute how u give us a little snippet and idea of what the next work will be about and who will be featured (excited for the idia piece!!) :3 I'm not really sure what u plan working on next (I think u mentioned dru? :o) but either way I am so excited and ready for anything u post (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ reading ur work always makes me happy; your blog is an addiction for me!! (>_<)

I hope u have a good rest of your weekend and make sure to rest up if you can!! :D u deserve any and all rest u can get after all the effort and work you put into feeding us so well ^_^

AHAHDHWHF (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ I LITERALLY JUST SENT AN ASK IN BUT I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVED SCARA COOKING FOR US (｡T ω T｡) he was so cute and such a little loser wanting to make sure we got three meals a day and keeping us comfortable (＞﹏＜) and the way we were teasing him about it aaaa!! the crumbs of scara's domesticity while being in his captivity LOLL

- - -

LOVELY, WONDERFUL, SWEET ANON, THANK YOU FOR SUCH A KIND MESSAGE OMG!!!!! ＊*♡( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ ）

I'm very flattered you liked the little easter eggs I sprinkled throughout. I like the sound of Teyvatcord; it's really cute, so I'm happy you could enjoy it as well! And the Knights of Favonius versus Harbingers for the tournament Scaramouche was complaining about... I had fun mentioning it! Hopefully his team can win in the tournament!!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ and subtly dropping Xiao into the story, too!! >:D aaaaa so many fun little allusions are packed in there!!

But I'm glad you liked the part where he's getting angry at his teammates (writing "can you stop spamming the chat for five seconds, Tartaglia? Damn!" had me cracking a silly smile because I could hear it in his voice so perfectly). I had so much fun writing that scene and his banter with Reader!! They have such a fun chemistry. >0< and his ego boost at learning you're a virgin!! He shouldn't let it feed his pride too much because he's also a virgin LOL. I had fun writing the sex scenes. Scara is so cute and lovable when he isn't being a bully. <3 originally, he was going to be very mean and it would be more so punishment sex than anything, but I liked the idea of Scara softening over the fact that it's your first time as well. Even he can be sentimental at times hehe!!

And cooking for you yes!!!! Beyond the death threats, he cares in very subtle ways and one of those is making sure you're always fed. It's perfect domestic malewife energy. Scara just wants you to be content when you're here as his kitten-captive-roommate???? All of those things... orz he's a loser, but he's a loser who cares and isn't that so sweet!!!! ^v^

I did indeed update the masterlist hehe!!! :D I'm happy to know you're looking forward to Idia's ficlet! As for what I am working on next, the upcoming chapter for DRU is halfway complete, so I might release it before finishing "The Most Dangerous Game" (a yan!Jade fic). After those fics, I'll either finish Dr. Riddle, the next Bittersweet Secret chapter, or begin writing yandere!Trey. I hope those fics can be something you can look forward to!!! (˚ᗜ˚*)

Thank you again for enjoying what I post!!! <3 I'm glad that it can make you happy!!!!! And I will be sure to get plenty of rest! Please also make sure to get enough rest and eat delicious foods and drink water and don't forget to take any medicines or vitamins you may need!!!

[fourtyfourcatss]

[████████ 100%] — @astralmysteria !

𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘ RECORD #01

[a/n] hey mysteria! i’m sorry this took so long, i was really busy for a long time, but here it is! i hope you enjoy.

Upright this represents femininity, beauty, nature, and nurturing. Reversed it represents creative block and dependence on others.

𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘ YOUR ARCANA IS… EMPRESS!

𑁍 From your described personality traits, I was very torn between TEMPERANCE and EMPRESS, for your arcana. But, after some long and hard musing, I must give you empress.

𑁍 The empress is a card that is assigned to many characters in the series, one of which is Haru, which you and her embody a lot of the traits it pertains, whether upright or reversed.

𑁍 Perfectionism and people pleasing (dependence on external) tends to lend aid to a creative block, and not only that, you told me that you were trying to get back into writing.

𑁍 You’re motherly, kind, empathetic, and I can tell by your personality you may either come off strong at times. Many of your traits indeed feel like what an empress would have, and you take pride in the things you do have and nurture and take care of it.

…loading match…

⚘ YUSUKE KITAGAWA

𑁍 Oh this match was perfect.

𑁍 First of all, your love languages. Yusuke is someone who is in need of gifts, in need of being spoiled. When you appear in his life to stay— he is very pleasantly surprised. Not only is he a man of gratitude and returning acts of affection so you would not feel unloved or perhaps even taken advantage of for your kindness, he is filled with anticipation for every gift, and surprisingly, wait a long time to use them if if can be used. He probably has a section in his place dedicated specifically to you, and treats you like a queen has graced the mortal realm. You seem hard to impress— so he will do his upmost in order to win your heart!

𑁍 He’s attracted to your kindness, but specifically, it had to be paired with all your other traits to make it right.

𑁍 so, so many nicknames. this man is going to shower you in the most sweetest of them. maybe it is a simple but tender “mys” uttered in his breath, or perhaps a “love?” — he tends to stick to the more formal sounding ones because of how he is, and yet, there will be times where he drops some funny ones jokingly, and that beckons not embarrassment or humiliation but rather good-hearted fun.

𑁍 You are a muse for him; with the vibes of your being and your singing. Yes, you are a beautiful woman, but he is more focused on how your characteristics enhances your attractiveness. He finds you talking whether it be to him or yourself very endearing, and he’s definitely going to draw whilst you sing. The way you inspire feelings out of him is a gratifying experience, its a passion. The two of you would be able to encourage and help each other out of creative blocks— but also, yusuke also has problems with taking care of himself. the two of you have problems taking care of yourselves, but now you have each other to take care of the other so extremely well. the rest of the cast is very soft and happy at this, hoping that this translates into treating yourselves better.

𑁍 yusuke is not loud, or inconsiderate in terms of jokes. he is a sweet lover, and he is perfect for you. the two of you would be super cute, i think. soft, with romantic tension in the air. i think you would exchange some sassy remarks, but it is a very healing process to be around each other.

as for runner ups: ryuji was one, and akihiko from P3 kept popping up in my mind. i think akihiko may be your one true love actually.

I AM THOU, THOU ART I… COME FORTH!

𑁍 TITANIA! 𑁍

The Queen of the Fairies, Titania is a character from Shakespeare’s Midsummer Night’s Dream. She is the wife of Oberon. Because of her grand power and charisma, people consider her the Queen of the Fairies. While she is rather delicate and graceful in appearance, her power and knowledge over magic easily match those of Oberon, the king of Fairies.

The description above fits you well, and Titania has manifested as a result! The reason why I chose her for you is because of the character studies I read for her over the ages, excluding the sections regarding extra-martial affairs she may have participated in. The compassion she holds for the changeling she wants to adopt is one of motherly. She is principled, standing up to her husband.

Not only that, I think her movesets fits you.

𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘ HOW IS SHE AWAKENED?

you are on a battlefield. your blood is singing through your veins, and you have just stepped out like a lamb to the slaughter.

how one awakens is a hard question, because it involves getting pushed to the brink by someone who is somewhat close to you in any manner, hostile or not. in your case, it would be a betrayal of a friend. you had introduced them to almost everyone you had known because you trusted her— and in a fit of rage, they had cursed out everyone they knew, you, and all you adored.

unable to take this slander towards your loved ones and aggrieved in your heart, you opened your resolve, and a mask appeared on your face.

“I am thou, and thou art I,—”

“I am Titania. I will become your mask. Now, let us enjoy a midsummer night's dream.”

𖤣. for weapon— you would have a RAPIER [The Sword of Sinai] or a BOW [SOURCE YUMI]

𖥧. for a gun— you would have a RAY GUN [SIRIUS]

𖡼. for outfits— school uniform would be like makoto’s with the jacket, and regular outfits would be like yukari and rise’s.

[eventiderpg]

Caesar Flickerman, the Master of Ceremonies, strode into view with his arms exuberantly raised in the air, vibrant hair coiffed up toward the ceiling. Harnessing the energy of the crowd that cheered him on, he beamed with a smile almost as bright as the spotlights that illuminated him. A catchy anthem invigorated his every step.

Today was crucial. All of Panem would learn more about those who were reaped, but not from outside information. No, directly from the tributes themselves. Fortunately, Caesar had a knack for bringing out the personalities of even the driest of people during his famous interviews. He had to if it meant winning them the hearts and donations of sponsors.

While the tributes waited in line to be ushered onto the stage and be scrutinized by a restless audience as well as those who watched from home, Caesar greeted the viewers with the following charismatic introduction:

“Ha ha ha ha! Thank you. Thank you, everyone, for being here tonight on the eve of the 75th Hunger Games! Seventy-five years! Can you believe it? Ha, time flies! And no one knows that better than the chosen few who are waiting backstage. I am elated to introduce you all to the 24 tributes of the Third Quarter Quell. A very special group indeed. Never seen before in the history of the Games. Because for this year alone, we’ll see for ourselves if more life experience makes for wiser, more efficient contenders. But first, let’s give them a chance to express themselves, because more life experience means more stories we’d like to hear. Isn’t that right? Ha ha! Let’s hear it for them! Yes, so exciting! Now, the first of our tributes hails from one of the esteemed career districts. I spoke to her briefly backstage, and she’s a firecracker of a woman. I love it, I love her. Come on out!”

Though the cycle of interviews provided some insight into those who were reaped, neither Caesar nor the tributes’ day was close to being over. Renting out the Museum of Panem History for a hefty but sufficient price, Caesar helped arrange an after-party where all walks of people could enjoy each other’s company. How else would high society get a closer look at the garments that the stylists worked so tirelessly to create? And what better place to view segments of the Games than in the spacious auditorium found in the museum? However, the curators strongly encouraged that any food and beverages remain in the dining room. Each display was too invaluable to risk an accident.

The excitement of Capitolites. The anticipation of tributes and their prep teams. The culture shock experienced by lottery winners. An amalgamation of emotions would brew within a building that contained relics of the nation’s controversial past. For the sake of everyone involved, the attendees could only hope the event would run smoothly, especially among individuals of such differing opinions and backgrounds. Though hope may not be enough to keep the growing unrest from boiling over.

This event is optional. Though if your muse(s) finds themselves at the gathering, be sure to tag your threads or drabbles with #eventideevent02. This event will take place from June 17th through July 8th. Any thread involving this event that is written after July 8th should also be tagged with #eventidepast. Under the cut, you will find the training scores for our twenty-four tributes! Happy roleplaying!

In the morning after their last day of training, the tributes demonstrated their abilities in front of the Gamemakers, and after much deliberation, they were given scores that reflected their skills or lack thereof. A new and compelling topic of discussion, the scores both garnered the attention of Capitolites and earned some a target on their backs. With this knowledge, tread carefully. Any misstep could cost one an allyship or sponsorship.

District One:

Anna: Nine

Lucky: Ten

District Two:

Ambrosia: Ten

Ezra: Ten

District Three:

Devyn: Seven

Discord: Four

District Four:

Rosmarinus: Ten

Fletcher: Nine

District Five:

Wendy: Five

Zephyr: Five

District Six:

Amara: Seven

Abel: Eight

District Seven:

Juniper: Eight

Laurel: Five

District Eight:

Ariadne: One

Benjamin: Four

District Nine:

Lavender: Six

Flax: Five

District Ten:

Tala: Seven

Callum: Four

District Eleven:

Jolene: Four

Ray: One

District Twelve:

Hazelle: Four

Chandler: Six

[arziaisfrench]

▪︎ IPKKND Ep 77 : The key

Khushi's awkwardness and embarrassment when she takes out the key from her bag is a very important scene !

She's starting to aknowledge slowly but surely her feelings for Arnav. I believe the key to open Khushi's heart is the same key Arnav dropped, that key that is supposed to make his dream come true !!

Her heart is opening up but she's still recluant to confront her feelings. You can also sense a certain shame that she probably felt by having to show them the key, her heart, and therefore her feelings ... for him.

"I'm nothing and I dare to have feelings for Arnav. Me? Who am I compared to him?" I also believe she is indeed ashamed of her status but mostly when she compares her life with his. The gap between them is so huge when it comes to social status and their own financial situations.

What's interesting with the way Khushi is written is that shame she's feeling, is coming from a place of self reflection and not simply out of a comparison based on a egocentrism.

She not feeling ashame for having feelings for a man who made it while she didn't but because, I think, she fears she can't make it like him, as much as he did.

"Would I ever be able to make it like him? He's so far away already ... Would I be able to be part of his world?"

Arnav was getting sad and frustrated while watching the padlock at her doors and the bars at her windows. And way before those two events happened, he dropped the key that day when they met in front of the mosque, way before he started to actually developed strong feeling for her. Khushi kept that key.

She kept it but also hid it. But from now on, she'll use it. She'll give him back the key, and he will unlock her heart completely !!

-> Let me share my own interpretation around the key :

The key is the tool that will lead him to his happiness. Khushi's heart is the door that key opens. His happiness is about winning her heart !

uuuuuuuuuuugh I love the symbolism so freaking muuuch !! 😍🥰

Of course, the key is the emotional and spiritual metaphor that illustrates the connection between the hearts of Khushi and Arnav.

Khushi is in denial, I feel like this key almost means more to her, because Arnav is the one who has to be the most careful not to make Khushi decide to cut him out of her life completely. Because unlike him, she is capable of it and in some mysterious way, he knows it.

For most of her life, she has used denial to hide her pain, and she will not hesitate to use it even to the detriment of her sanity.

This is an involuntary hug Khushi really needed and one Arnav really wanted to give her lol (especially after hearing from Anjali what happen with the necklace).

He removes his hand from her because he tries to respect her boundaries (he understands now fully the importance she holds to her "modesty"). Did you notice how Khushi lingered on his chest ?! hehe as she should ! 😏

uugh the tension!

This was probably their first vonlontarily "sensual" moment ! They already had some sexy moments before, but here, it was sensual yall ! They definitely wanted to kiss, not really tho loool (hmhm) but you can see the pull being hard for them to ignore hehe.Arnav couldn't stop his own face from moving closer as he felt Khushi straighten up haha PERIIIOD.

"Here, take my heart. I give it to you. Do you accept it?" He looks so soft and gentle here uuuugh my heart !! 🥰

Did you see how Khushi's fingers lingered on his? She definitely did it on pupose just like that time when she gave him her resignation letter!! uuuuugg this is so freaking romantic !!

I'm sure Arnav felt that subtle touch and tried to understand the meaning of it ! Khushi was staring at him back, probably trying to give him (unconsciously or not) a hint !

Khushi helping Arnav to free her dupItta is the second hint he needed to understand that she won't refuse his proximity and touch 👀 He's very suprised haha !!!!

"If god wants then that chunari will fall on your head by itself"

[megbox]

2023 Year In Review

Previous Posts:

2020s: (2022), (2021), (2020)

2010s: (2019), (2018), (2017), (2016), (2015), (2014), (2013), (2012), (2011)

Yes, I am indeed writing this on December 18, 2024. You'll have to forgive me if the emotional details are sparse as I am essentially putting this together from scraps of memory and social media archives. It just feels wrong to skip a year, you know? Better late than never.

January

mostly occupied with adjusting to the celiac diagnosis. i had my endoscopy on january 31, which meant that for the two weeks prior i got to eat everything glutenous in the world that i wanted for the last time in my life. i had my friends over and everyone brought a gluten-containing item and we called it the "gluten olympics." we're talking bread pudding, chinese pork buns, soft pretzels. my intestines were DAMAGED but it was an homage to the last time i will get to enjoy these things in my life. the endoscopy was an awful 20 minutes of my life and i unfortunately remember all of the procedure but it confirmed that i do, indeed, have celiac and so that was that.

i began officially training for my first marathon.

February

honestly just a lot of running and a lot of graduate school.

learned i loved (and am pretty good at!) statistics.

March

more running, more graduate school.

ran the st. patrick's day road race 5k with my mom.

started getting into "longest ever run of my life" territory with my marathon training long runs each sunday which was genuinely very motivating and exciting. started to feel like i could actually pull this thing off.

drama started unfolding with my roommate/friend.

April

turned 29!

my brother and rie got engaged when they were visiting japan :)

went to vancouver with emma for rachel's bachelorette party which i was very happy to have been invited to.

spring slow pitch started up again.

drama got worse with roommate/friend. started to figure out an escape plan.

May

met a boy i really liked which had not happened in a WHILE. thought things were going well and then he ended things. sadness ensued.

RAN THE FUCKING SASKATCHEWAN MARATHON.

June

suffered extreme post-marathon blues.

immediately signed up for a trail race and started going to run club as a means of keeping the vibes alive. the guy who runs the run club expressed interest in me and kept coming on way too strong and ruining the vibe because i went to run club just to meet friends and he always wanted to run together and would like DM me after and constantly text me and ask me to hang out and then he invited me to his best friend's wedding in canmore as his date and i was like DUDE i barely know you so i ghosted him and run club.

went to lucas and mack's wedding in jasper and co-emcee'd with carly.

July

moved the FUCK out of my old place and into my own new place!

attended rachel & adam's wedding and went home with someone i shouldn't have but it was still an overall great night.

went to crowsnest pass to watch the 7 kings win sinister 7! honestly had an 11/10 time as a spectator/hype woman.

went to SEATTLE with my friends & some other random swifties and saw the fucking eras tour. i was so tragically broke from the damage deposit & increased rent unexpectedly from the beginning of the month + the weddings. also wow some of those swifties take shit SERIOUSLY and also this was my first time traveling with celiac and so i was actually quite stressed for the entire trip but the concert was awesome and i am glad i went.

August

ran a PB in the edmonton half marathon with no metrics on my watch.

September

my brother & rie got married! i officiated.

dylan & jon also got married.

i started year 2 of grad school and also started my second gig as a TA which was SWEET money but a lot of extra work on grading weeks. omg.

October

visited saskatoon for thanksgiving

November

just... grad school, TAing, and running.

December

more grad school, TAing, and running.

visited arizona and got to hang with uncle ron, auntie wendy, reid and lindsay for a few days which was genuinely SUCH a nice treat and maybe the first time in a long time i actually let myself feel like i was on vacation and just... relax.

[phoenix-of-jade]

Xuan nodded and smiled at Teru's comment about how he hoped that the raven haired could stomach heavier kinds of music. "Don't you worry, princess! I like heavy metal as much as I enjoy classical music, so shot me your very best!" The man's charming smirk made it sound like a challenge for the incubus to go on and impress him to his best ability. "I'd love to also hear some of your ballads and why not, even maybe serve as inspiration for you for a future song. I wouldn't mind that!" Winking at him, Xuan then pat his back, slowly sliding his hand towards the younger's small of the back, near his ass. Confident and cocky as he was, of course Xuan was going to ask to have a song written for him, in a subtler way, but still straight to the point.

"Oh, my little curious Alice, not only do you now belong to a mafia leader, but mind you, a Chinese mafia of all thingsl! So I guess you can count yourself as being a bit more special than those other guys who are part of the Yakuza." Chuckling Xuan continued talking in a proud tone, since the younger's questions gave him the opportunity of boasting a little bit about himself. "Weapons? Oh, no, I do not carry any on me, my dear. You see, the only weapons I will ever need lay here..." The man pointed towards his mouth, meaning his sharp tongue and skill of charming and manipulating people with his words. "... And this." He then pointed to his head. "I'm a rather deadly man as well. So much so that I am formally known in the industry as The Green Eyed Death. Not my favorite nickname to be frank, but it gets the point across." Xuan shrugged his shoulders and smirked once again. "I once took out a group of 20 men with my bare hands alone."

'Duality'. Xuan reflected on the word written on Teru's arm for a moment, holding back a slight snort. Indeed, that word illustrated rather well the nature of his new companion. He could tell that from the very start. "I guess at the end of the day, we are all halves of both good and evil. No one is perfect by any means." Xuan closed his eyes as if contemplating at the philosophical nature of the human being itself. "But alas, I already know what demons are, my dear. The Devil himself was once the most beautiful and treasured angel in God's army. It's one of the reasons I like to remind myself that looks are extremely deceiving, because you can never know what intentions may lay behind the most angelic of beauties!" With a sheepish smirk, Xuan turned his head to look at the incubus. In a way he was kind of talking about himself too and maybe Teru would come to understand that too as they continued walking down the long halls.

As they continued walking, Teru rambling on about his own preferences in terms of atmosphere and his more romantic side and the other listening to him with the utmost attention, the two finally entered one of the halls that allowed for a more personal dive into who Xuan was, as the decorations adorning the walls had a more intimate and personal touch pertaining to the man's past. While all of the artisanal décor so far was mostly for decorative purpose, serving to allude to Xuan's very classy and refined tastes through their exquisite and luxuriant nature, as well as the aesthetic touch they brought to the atmosphere of his home, the objects and paintings of this particular section held the vibe of what could only be family heirlooms, with some looking really old and antique.

There were also a few framed photos depicting a younger Xuan in his more glorious moments: winning an important award, scoring first in a national examination, to name a few, and of course the traditional graduation photos and class group pictures. Only thing was... None of them showed or radiated the usual warmth and joy you'd expect from photos of the sort. They all felt gloom and gave a sober vibe to the atmosphere, as if the person depicted within them was only feigning the impression of happiness and pride. And maybe the one that stood best as testimony to it all was the biggest center piece of the wall leading to the inner chambers: a beautiful and big hand painted family portrait of a 13 year old Xuan stood next to an older man, who judging by the intimidating stance and serious air, must've been his step-father. Even if the two weren't blood related, they did have a few characteristics that kind of made them resemble each other, but for a family portrait, the piece lacked any sense of the usual familial warmth you'd expect from such a panting. It was as cold as ice and very somber. You could tell something was wrong from the looks alone: while he smiled, there was something missing in young Xuan's eyes, as they betrayed a certain type of sadness and loneliness, an unknown longing lost deep within the seas of emerald of his dashing gaze, a vibe which went hand in hand with his father's arm rested around his tiny shoulders in what wanted to be a paternal embrace of care and protection, but failed miserably. If anything, the painting gave you a sense of pity for the boy. To even think such an innocent and sad looking child would have his hands stained in blood and be responsible of more deaths than the number of years he'd been in this world alone...

"Are you coming?" Xuan's voice broke the incubus out of whatever trance took hold of him without the male even realizing it. He must've been staring at the pictures and painting for quite some time. "We are finally here!" The raven haired exclaimed with excitement as he proceeded to open the doors to an equally elegant, eccentric and exquisite bedroom just like the rest of the man's mansion. "You weren't wrong there: I am really planning on treating you just like a princess and maybe even better!~ Please make yourself at home!" He then walked to a table that had displayed on it a very nice assortment of alcoholic drinks, perhaps the ones Xuan had previously ordered the butler to bring to his room.

[@anemia-rp]

Continued from here [X]

Xuan wasn't the type to be easily intimidated or frightened by anyone. In fact, seeing how people tried their very best at inducing fear into those they thought as weak and submissive, kind of amused him. It just showed how weak the human character could actually be at times, since more often than not the very same people who sought to impose their strength and power over others through sheer brute force were, in fact, just some scarred little souls hidden underneath shallow husks.

That's why when Teru attacked him, pinning him to the wall, Xuan didn't sketch the slightest of reactions. He could see right through this feisty man's front and he could tell from the very first glance he threw at him that night that Teru was the submissive type, someone who will appear as stubborn and tough, but will kneel and crumble easily under his boot. Their positions of power were soon going to switch drastically, it was just a matter of time and Xuan didn't feel like rushing this little 'game' of cat and mouse he'd set for himself, at least for a while.

With a slight snort, the raven haired gave the younger another defiant look, before speaking in the calmest of tones, sure of the fact this will piss him off even further. "I think the only wasted one here is you, since you're literally chasing after someone who made a fool out of you in front of your entire group. Shouldn't you be trying to save face and find some drunken idiot to smash on the pool table instead? Or could it be that you actually have a degradation kink and all that humiliation actually turned you on?" Another jeering grin. "Sorry, but I don't mingle with pathetic little hoes. You'll have to do much better than this to impress me."

As an emphasis on how 'unimpressed' he was, Xuan then feigned a yawn and leant back against the wall, feeling the pressure applied by the other's arm onto his chest tighten. "Bold of you to assume I wouldn't be able to handle you, princess! Also, I am curious as to what do you mean by my kind? Do you, perhaps, dare compare me to those lousy fucks inside the bar, who spend their days pimping bitches and ordering idiots around to do their biddings, while they sip on cheap wine and sit all day with a cane stuck up their asses?" Raising an eyebrow, Xuan then tilted his head to the side. "I'm sorry, but in this case, your assumption is wrong. I might be of the refined kind, but trust me, unlike those idiots who try pretending they are something they are not, I actually live up to my status as leader of my organization."

In just a split second, without much of a struggle, the man then used his foot to kick the succubu's legs in one swift motion before he'd even be able to react, just enough that he could make the man lose his balance, before freeing himself and applying three more sturdy hits with his hand and elbow to Teru's side, back and neck, only to finish by grabbing the younger's hand and painfully twisting it to his back, pushing him face first into the wall. The green eyed bastard was soo quick that there was barely even time for an outsider to register when and what happened. "Who's all lame now, hmm?" Back to his conceited cocky tone, Xuan then leant against him to whisper in the younger's ear. "Here's a pro tip: never judge a book by its cover. Your little show of bravery was fun to watch, but unfortunately, you still have room for lots of improvement."

[@anemia-rp]

[the-bottom-of-the-abyss]

siren song - chapter 1

previous chapter: prologue

next chapter: chapter 2

A/N: First, thank you so so so much for all your kind words!! I did not expect for this to get as many notes as it did! I'm so happy you guys are excited bc I am too! That being said, this is a long one! Also I changed it to a reader insert bc I think it fits better. If you haven't played the campaign, this mission is straight from it with most dialogue being the same. I really wanted this to feel like you were there the whole time. A lot of it is that mission but there's a small gift at the end ;) Our MC's femme fatale ways will return in full force next chapter!

----

Ghost

27 August 2022

2330, Classified location, Al Mazrah

Ghost approached the helicopter, listening to General Shepard.

"You're wheels up in five."

"Roger."

"Marines are loading in now. You'll be leading with two Sergeants."

"Two?"

"Soap MacTavish and Siren."

Ghost scoffed under his breath. "No last name?"

"It's classified."

Before he could make a smart remark, one of the many soldiers coming off a truck approached him. "Let's get ourselves a win, yeah, Lt.?" The man addressed him causally, causing Ghost to assume this was "Soap". 

Soap lightly punched his shoulder. "Save ya a seat sir."

Just his chipper attitude was enough to make Ghost brace for a long mission. As he was about to go board the helicopter as well, a black SUV stopped close to him, and the backdoor opened to reveal a woman in tactical gear, helmet in her hands, and a rifle on her back. She quickly walked towards him and he took in her appearance; hair pulled back into a ponytail, an objectively beautiful face, and piercing eyes. It was her expression that made him pause. She didn't sport any particular expression, almost as if her own skin was the mask, hiding all underneath.

Almost as if he couldn't help himself, his gaze wavered. He silently scolded himself as he looked her up and down, his steady pulse feeling more fleeting than normal. Once reaching him, she stuck out her hand and looked him straight in the eyes, not even acknowledging his skull. "Siren, sir. Nice to meet you."

Logically, Ghost knew there was another Sergeant, he was told so. But for some reason, he was taken aback at the beautiful and seemingly fairly young woman in front of him. It was clear she was an American, the only one on their current team.

He shook her hand, noting that her hands were much smaller, but her grip was just as strong as his. "Ghost," he replied. "Board the heli, we're leaving in a few." 

There was something about her. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but she was hypnotizing, and by the look in her eyes, dangerous too.

"Fucking hell."

----

Siren

27 August 2022

2345, In helicopter en route to Al Mazrah

You sat in between two marines who kept glancing at you, not that you payed any mind. No, you were more intrigued by the man in front of you. The man with the deep, British accent: the Liutenant. He wore a skull mask on top of a balaclava, the only thing truly visible was his eyes. Those same eyes gave you a thorough look over earlier, not bothering to hide the action. Unlike most men he didn't shy away from sustained eye contact. 

In fact, his gaze was on you right now and intense; it made you feel a flicker of something you hadn't felt in a very long time.

You cocked your eyebrow, asking what he was looking at. 

His eyes then narrowed as if to say: Indeed, what am I looking at?

It felt like a contest, seeing which would break first; the tension felt like—

“So what’s your name?” 

Soap, the Sergeant with a Scottish accent, interrupted the intense moment, bringing everyone’s attention to you. 

“Siren.” You replied, not bothering to elaborate. 

There was a pause, Soap looking at you expectantly. And while he wasn’t looking anymore, you could sense that the Lieutenant’s curiosity was also peaked. 

“Why?” The Sergeant asked. 

You took a breath. It was always…. odd to explain your name. It’s not like you chose it. And for those who were stupid enough, would comment about your “tactics.” You didn’t know these men, and they didn’t know you; it was probably better that way. 

“I suppose if we’re working together,” you started, “you’ll find out eventually.”

And with that, you didn’t say anything else. Instead, you chose to examine your rifle, the SP-X 80; reliable, and quick— two of your favorite things in a weapon. You did like getting up close and personal, the adrenaline, the satisfaction at successful fooling others into believing you were some innocent but seductive woman instead of a cold-hearted killer. However, if you couldn’t do it close, you liked being far. 

Eventually Ghost stood up and began his brief. 

“Bravo team offloads here. Alpha team stays onboard to land downrange. Both teams meet in the middle. Remember, we want Hassan alive, but this is capture or kill.”

The marines singalled their affirmative, whether by nods or a “Yes sir.” You and Soap both got up to follow Ghost as he went to exit the helicopter.

“Keep up Soap, Siren,” he threw over his shoulder as he stepped out.

You put on your helmet, slung both the rifle and an M4 over your back, and put on your night vision goggles, everything appearing in shades of blue. 

“Razor-1, all Bravo deployed. Moving to secondary HLZ.”

The helicopter flew on ahead while you and the others with you moved forward through the destroyed cobblestone.

All of sudden, shots were being fired ahead, followed by a panicked pilot on comms. “All stations- Razor-1 is bracketed, we’re getting lit!”

“Incoming-Flares! Flares!” flares erupted from the helicopter, narrowly avoiding being taken out by a missile. “Shit that was close!”

Before anyone could echo their relief, you saw something out of the corner of your eye, something headed straight towards the heli. 

“Second missile!” you yelled into the comms. Unfortuantely it was too quick for them to react and you and the rest of the Bravo team watched the missile collide with the helicopter, sending it spiraling downwards.

“Razor-1 going down! We’re going down!”

It crashed into the ground, landing in the middle of some buildings and erupting into flames prompting Ghost to try to hail the other team. “Alpha, what’s your status?”

Gunshots began to ring out, aimed at the downed aircraft. There was still no response from the comms and you watched the Liteunant attempt to contact them again. “Alpha, how copy?”

Finally, the channel crackled to life. “Bravo—Alpha is immobile. Multiple critical!”

“Oh shit! We’re taking effective fire!”

All you could do was watch in dismay as gunfire rained down on the heli, with only a few shots being returned.

“Alpha,” Ghost radioed, “we’re moving to building 1. Hold tight.”

At that, Soap swung his head towards the Liteunant, “Ghost, we need to secure that crash site now.”

Ghost shook his head, “First we clear for Hassan, that takes the heat off Alpha. Then we secure the crash site. Clear?”

“Roger that.” Soap said.

“Roger,” you echoed.

The team crept closer, guns sweeping in all directions as you moved through the farm plots and up to the building. As you reached the top of the hill where the backdoor was, you began to here Al-Qatala forces talking, yelling to keep firing at the helicopter, anticipating more of us would show up to aid the Alpha team. While it may have seemed cold, Ghost was right; you could admire that: making those hard decisions, ones that seemed heartless to everyone else.

You swapped out your sniper rifle for your M4 and aimed at the door. Ghost pulled out a sledgehammer, “Breacher up!” and smashed the door down, seemingly taking very little effort on his part. Two people were inside, immediately taken out by five people simoltanelously firing.

“Sweep through,” he ordered. Both floors were clear of both AQ and Hassan, as announced by two marines.

Almost immediately, though, one of them shouted into their comms, “Contact! Building two!”

“They know we’re here!” Ghost shouted. You switched back to your sniper and aimed for the opposite building. You took out two while Soap, also sporting a sniper rifle, took out the others.

“All stations, crash site is taking rocket fire from building two, second deck!”

“Alpha,” Ghost responded, “taking building two now, hold fast!” He gestured for the team to follow him towards the back of building two and instructed Soap to enter through the window. You followed Ghost in, and watched as he threw a knife and hit an AQ member dead center in the face. While you didn’t have time to think too hard about it now, you noted to file that memory for later. He kneeled, pulling the knife out of the man’s face before gesturing to go upstairs. Before you could move forward too much, the soldier infront of you was shot from a room attached to the hallway. “I’m hit!”

You quickly shot his attacker and he mumbled, “Someone in the next hallway.”

You moved forward with your M4, taking out the person aiming at the heli with a rocket launcher. Soap appeared before and spoke into the comms, “Ghost, Siren took out the enemy rocket.”

“Roger. Time to hit the crash site,” Ghost responded. “Siren, how are you with that rifle?” At some point he removed his night vision googles, revealing his eyes, visible through his mask. Maybe others shied away from his gaze, but you never were one to back down.

You looked him straight in the eye and replied, “Deadly, sir.”

You could have swore his eyes widened a fraction, suprised by your answer. 

“Stay here on the balcony for cover fire, rest of Bravo, circle up outside.”

The rest of the team left, talking to your team member who was shot in the chest plate in the hall.

You made your way out to the balcony and laid down, propping up your rifle and watched as Ghost and Soap made their way to the helicopter, everyone else fanning out in front of building two for cover.

The comms crackled with Ghost’s gravely voice, “Expect contact. AQ’s waitin’ for us.”

 Both of them were only in the heli for a few seconds before you spotted enemy combatants approaching from the tree line.

“Engage!”

As soon you heard his order, you found your first target. You emptied your mind of all concerns, wrestled control of any errant thoughts of this or that. You took a deep breath and pulled the trigger.

—-

Ghost 

28 August 2022

0030, Al Mazrah, U.R.A.

‘Deadly, sir’ she says, he thought to himself. He can hear himself calling out directions of enemies to the others, his firing on autopilot. But everytime a target becomes to close for comfort, they fall, bullet to the head. And he knows Soap is firing in another direction, leaving only one person to be taking them out at a rapid speed.

Something about her prickled his senses. Maybe it was her demeanor, her confidence. Maybe it was that she looked like she knew what everyone else was thinking. Maybe it was that she seemed to challange him with her eyes whenever he looked. He wasn’t sure he liked it.

For now, he didn’t have time to entertain those thoughts, busy on trying to prevent being pinned down by AQ.

After the first wave was over, he ordered for Bravo 7-6 to call in air support, not wanting to get overrun by any reinforcements that were surely on their way.

Before air support could arrive, smoke rolled into the treeline.

“Siren, do you have a visual behind the treeline?” he questioned into the comms.

“Take cover—They have grenade launchers! I’ll take them out!” she responded in an urgent tone.

He heard one shot….two… three… four… five…

“Ghost, launchers gone. More AQ on the field.”

Both he and Soap worked on clearing out the rest of the field, eventually all movement ceasing.

In the stillness, he radioed back to his other Sergeant, “Siren, I need you down here right now.”

“Roger. Moving.”

Soap approached his side, “Ghost, we should fall back to the house.”

“Negative,” Ghost said, “We clear this position and push. If Hassan’s still here, he’s out ahead. 7-6, patch us through to air support.”

“7 Actual, Kilo 0-1. Fire is one mike.”

“Kile 0-1, you’re cleared hot on anything forward of our position. Danger close approved.” As he was talking, Siren joined them in the heli, nodding at him and Soap.

“You’re a damn good shot, lass,” the Scott declared, earning him a small smile from her.

Before he could say anything, Bravo 7-2 interuptted, “Lieutenant, we got armored vehicles incoming. Four of them.”

Ghost was not suprised, but it wasn’t ideal for a downed helicopter to be the only cover you have against APCs. 

“Standby for engage!” he ordered. “Get ready….!” 

The vehicles made their way onto the field in front of them. “Cut ‘em down!”

They rained gunfire on the vehicles; the air support pilot’s voice broke through: “All Bravo, Kilo 0-1 is inbound hot, danger close.”

“Engaging secondaries.”

The vehicles were taken down in quick fashion, any stragglers also meeting the same fate.

“We clear?” Soap asked.

“Fuckin’ hope so,” Siren replied, still aiming her rifle through the helicopter windows.

After ordering for a bird to be ready for exfiltration he addressed the team in front of him. “Get yourselves sorted. Hassan is still the target.”

“Aye,” Soap approved. “Let’s go get this fucker.”

They quickly moved away from the helicopter site and made for the compound in front of them.

“They used the helicopter as bait,” Siren observed, taking a position on his left.

“They’re well supplied and fighting smart. Thanks to Hassan,” Ghost replied.

The team made their way through a grassy field, frames of various structures littering the area. 

Not even a second after the compound came into view, a green laser also appeared. The soldier to the left of Siren was shot, prompting her to yell out and move closer to Ghost. “Fuck! Man down!”

“AQ sniper on the roof!” he called out, “Get down!”

Ghost knew just by her rank that she has seen combat before; hell, she was a sniper herself, she didn’t need his aid. But for some reason, he found himself roughly grabbing her arm and dragging her down to the ground with him. She landed pressed against his side, caught offguard by the force of his pull. 

A second passed and she quickly went prone on the ground and both her and Soap aimed for the roof.

“Sniper down!” Soap exclaimed after firing a shot. 

“More snipers on the roof, take them out!” Ghost ordered.

Siren fired two shots, one right after the other, and he saw to bodies fall instantly. If nothing else, she was a damn good sharpshooter.

Despite their best efforts, 7-5 was shot. 

“They’ve got fucking nightvision,” Siren said as she fired off another shot, “we’re sitting ducks out here.”

She was right, and he knew it. “Soap, Siren! Keep us covered, we’re moving up!”

As he crouched and moved up, he kept hearing the two snipers firing but it wasn’t enough to keep all the heat off of them.

“7-6!” Ghost yelled, “I want air support fire on that building now!”

“Ghost,” Siren said, sounding slightly dumbfounded, “we don’t fucking know if Hassan’s in there!”

He gritted his teeth, annoynace flaring up at the pushback. “They’re forcing our hand! 7-6, hit that building, but don’t level it.”

“Kilo 0-1 to Bravo team, copy that, making our run.”

As soon as he saw the helicopter, he yelled out to the remaining team members, “Force up to that wall! Move!”

Building 3 was lit in a fire, tinted yellow by the nightvision googles, shots coming from every which way.

“That’s a glorious sight,” Ghost said, crouching behind a half crumbled wall.

“Thank Christ for air support,” Soap commented.

“Yeah,” Siren said, swiveling her head towards Ghost, “hope Hassan’s still in one piece…”

“Several pieces will do,” he replied with a smirk hidden behind his balaclava at the way she shook her head in disdain. “Easier to find that way.”

He continued, not waiting for her reply, “All Bravo, move up. I want this building locked down. Lead us in Soap. Siren, behind me. Let’s find Hassan. Dead or alive.”

Siren took a staggered position behind him, an M4 aimed at the opened door.

Soap, barely two steps in, fired at an assailant running for him. Seemingly clear, Ghost entered, followed by Siren.

“Check the bodies,” he ordered. “We need positive ID on Hassan.”

None of the bodies nor any of the alive hostiles Soap encountered were ID’d as Hassan, prompting Ghost to order the team to the second deck.

Soap fell behind while Ghost and Siren lead the others up the stair. A closed door was on the right; Ghost looked at Siren and nodded his head towards it. She took position, aiming at the hallway in front while Ghost approached the door from the side. Ghost didn’t need to open the door as the door began to open, a rifle aimed at Siren.

Ghost opened the door the rest of the way and grabbed the solder by his rifle and slammed him into the wall and quickly shot him in the heart and the head before letting the body hit the ground.

Ghost continued into the room, feeling Siren at his back. “Got two X-rays,” he informed her at the site of the two wounded AQ soldiers in the room. “Dump ‘em.” 

Two single shots were fired and they dropped to the ground. 

“Clear,” she said. 

“Hassan’s everywhere,” Ghost commented to no one in particular. Three screens were playing speeches by him, denouncing the West for taking out Ghorbani.

“Everywhere but here,” Soap retorted.

Soap pushed forward first, follwed by the rest. Several people jumped out but were promptly eliminated. 

The room they entered looked well used but had blueprints. Combined with the previous room that had a dozen computers, Ghost called out, “He was here. This is a bloody ops-center. Poke around, Soap.”

Ghost watched Soap move towards the desk after checking the balcony and move around several papers. Then he moved on to the jacket draped over the chair.

“Look,” Soap called out, “Hassan’s uniform.”

“So he was here,” Siren concluded.

Ghost nodded. “Lost him when we secured the crash site.”

Soap looked at him incrediously, “Are you sayin’ we shouln’t have helped?” Interestingly Siren did not seem put off by his statement like Soap was.

“Choices have consequences,” was all Ghost said in reply, not willing to discuss the ethics of prioritizing team or target.

“All Bravo-we got movement out here.”

“On the way,” Ghost said into his radio, locking eyes with Siren on his way out. “All Bravo, circle up outside.”

As they moved out of the building, Soap voiced some of his thoughts out lout. “If Hassan’s gone, then what the hell are they still protecting?”

“Good fucking question,” Ghost heard Siren say somewhere behind him.

The night air fully greeted them once more along with the rest of the Bravo team. 

“What do we got?” Ghost questioned.

“A warehouse,” Bravo 7-6 replied. “Roll up door’s open. Heard somethin’ inside.”

“Copy, let’s clear it.”

After entering, the lights suddenly flipped on, forcing them to remove the night vision goggles. Bullets were aimed their way, hitting the shelves they took cover behind. Ghost reached around to fire at the soldiers, being mirrored by Soap and Siren. 

“Fuck!” he heard Siren yell loudly. “Grazed me!”

Ghost whipped his head around to see her pull a bloody hand away from her upper thigh 

He watched her eyes narrow in fury and continued shooting, not caring about having to lean on her good leg for better support.

Ghost didn’t bother telling her to fall back; the inferno present in her expression told him that it wouldn’t be well recieved or listened to. 

Soon enough, all the threats were taken care of, leaving them to finally be able to locate what the hell AQ was so desperate on protecting.

“Search the warehouse. Let’s find what they were hiding….”

Serious weaponry was found along crates of ammunition. Ghost shook his head in slight disbelief at all the hardware present. “This warehouse wasn’t on the intel.”

“Guys, come look at this,” he heard Siren yell.

She stood in front a blue shipping container, gun trained on the doors.

Ghost walked to her side, glancing at her leg, blood visible through her gear.

“It was just a graze,” she said, eyes still on the container. “I’m fine.” Before he could say anything else, Soap approached the doors of the crate and opened it, revealing a server and a control console. 

“What the fuck is this?” he asked.

“It’s in English,” Siren observed.

 Ghost and the two Sergeants backed up to look above the container.

“Steamin’ Jesus,” Soap breathed out.

“Ballistic missiles,” Ghost said, not quite believing his eyes.

“It’s a mobile laucher,” Siren added, “These’ll go 1,000 miles.”

“At least…” Ghost trailed off.

Soap was the first to break out of their stupor, walking around to the side and climbing the crate for a closer look. “How the hell did Iran get their hands on this?”

Siren walked with a slight limp around to the side as well while Ghost hailed Laswell.

“This is Watcher-1, send traffic.”

“Laswell, this is Ghost,” he said as he walked to stand beside Siren. “We got something.”

“Tell me you found Hassan…”

Before he could reply, Soap interupted, “Guys take a look at this…”

Siren let out a quiet gasp and muttered in disbelief, “What the fuck…”

Ghost finally could see what she was suprised at. The missile launcher had an American flag on the side.

“Ghost, do you have Hassan?”

“Negative,” he told Laswell. “We found a weapons cache. Hassan’s got missiles… they’re American.”

General Shepard’s voice broke through. “0-7- this is Gold Eagle Actual, repeat your last…”

“I say again—Hassan has American missiles.” 

——

Siren

28 August 2022

0300, Safehouse, somewhere in Al Mazrah

After the missile was found, they were ordered to exfil, with the marines returning to the nearest base while Ghost, Soap, and you stayed in a safehouse for further instructions. The drive was a quiet one, the three of you stuck in your own thoughts about the missile situation. 

The safehouse was low-profile, surrounded by nothing but trees. It had three bedrooms, a bathroom and a kitchen you noted as the three of you entered.

“I call first shower!” Soap exclaimed, brushing past you and Ghost, making a beeline for the bathroom. You sat your bag with your weapons and clothing down in the living room before looking in the kitchen for a first aid kit, sporting a slight limp. As you looked around, you heard Ghost venture down the hallway, likely picking a room.

You finally found one under the kitchen sink and took a seat on the couch, rag and kit next to you. You looked at blood from the wound; you could feel it wasn’t very deep, but definitely noticable and painful. As you threaded a needle in preperation, you heard light footsteps behind you. You looked over your shoulder and saw Ghost, mask still present, looking at you. His gaze fell from your face to your thigh. You drew in a steady breath and returned your attention to the needle. Once it was tied off, you wet a rag with rubbing alcohol and set it aside as well.

Before you could do anything else, he walked up to you and spoke for the first time since arriving.

“I’ll stitch you up.” 

You nodded, not feeling like arguing, and it was at a weird angle for you to do yourself. 

“Stand up and take off your pants,” he said in that deep tone of his, looking at you with piercing brown eyes.

You scoffed quietly and unbuttoned the top before gently stepping out of your pants.

“No dinner first?” you teased, standing before him in only your long sleeved shirt and black underwear.

“I usually skip straight to desert,” he said as he kneeled in front of you, eye level with your wound. You sucked in a breath at the sight; it had been a long time since a man kneeled in front of you other than to beg for his life.

He grabbed your injured leg with one hand, while the other grabbed the cloth and began to clean the wound. You hissed at the stinging sensation but otherwise stayed still. Maybe you should have been making some small talk but you found it hard to focus between the pain and the hand wrapped around your thigh to keep it still. 

“Good work on the mission,” Ghost said, placing the cloth aside to instead pick up the needle and thread. His knuckles double tapped your inner uninjured leg, motioning for you to spread them apart. You did and quietly sucked in a breath when he leaned closer to get a better look. 

“You are a deadly shot.”

“Thanks,” you said, wincing when the needle first went in. “Though I prefer up close and personal.” His hand twitched slightly, tightening by a fraction. His focus was on stitching up the graze on the side of your leg but you were focused on his hand that held the inner part of your thigh. He moved his hand up as he worked, index finger nearly grazing the edge of your underwear. His closeness was awakening desire in you; you could feel your underwear getting more damp and just hoped he couldn’t smell your arousal. Part of you wanted him to move his hand to spare you from getting so worked up. But the other, much louder part of you wanted him to slide his hand up, hook two fingers into your panties, pull them aside and—

You closed your eyes, willing your face not to redden; you have men constantly touching you for a job, for God’s sake! 

You weren’t so naive to think he was the same as all those other men, though. No, this one was different.

“Finished,” Ghost said, “make sure not to pull them.” You looked down at him and found his eyes already on yours.

You could see that he was likely wearing a neutral expression, but his eyes revealed a split second of heat before being schooled into indifference.

Not looking away, he gave your inner thigh a squeeze and let his hand travel down the inside of your leg, finally dropping when he reached your knee.

He stood up, and for a second, you could have swore you saw him glance in between your thighs.

Again, the two of you stared at each other, a tension building and building, one of you having to break first; he took a small step towards you and—

“Am I interrupting something?” 

Soap walked into the living room, hair still wet from the shower. Of course, from his view, it was odd, seeing his fellow Sergeant in her underwear with his Lieutenant.

“No,” Ghost said, moving towards the hall. “We were just finished.”

You pulled your pants back on and went back to your room, replaying whatever the fuck just happened.

Taglist:

@nobody-000 @theyounglingslayer @untoldshortsofthefandoms @memeorydotcom @kuutski @your-highnessmarvel

[if-you-fan-a-fire]

“The Kingston Community Legal Clinic is warning residents after a Landlord and Tenant Board adjudicator decided a landlord was wrongfully attempting to evict their tenant.

“The landlord seeks possession of the rental unit so his mother can live there,” adjudicator Laura Hartslief wrote in her June 28 decision on the fate of Jason Martin’s home in the basement unit of 151 Fraser St. “I am not satisfied that it is more likely than not that she genuinely intends to live there.”

Jordan Morelli, a physics professor at Queen’s University who owns the rental unit, said he is devastated by Hartslief’s decision.

“It’s a complete outrage that we’ve lost this thing because I’ve been trying to get my parents here for two years,” Morelli said. “I really want my parents to be living in there.”

John Done of the Kingston Community Legal Clinic represented Martin at the Landlord and Tenant Board hearing. He said his clinic has seen a significant increase in evictions for landlords to renovate units or to use for their own use — which is what Morelli applied for. In many of those cases, but not all, landlords evict a tenant who is paying a lower rent, renovate the unit, and rent it out again for sometimes double the cost.

Done said that, at first, Martin was resigned to moving out, but when Done saw Martin’s case, he urged him to push back against Morelli.

“These are situations we see all of the time in a Landlord’s Own Use application, and our view is (that) once we start putting these under the microscope, a lot of them don’t have merit,” Done said. “Once Mr. Martin said he would accept our help, then there were, indeed, some things that sort of leaped off the page. … There were the hallmarks of these (types of) landlords’ applications that I don’t think they could show good faith.”

Martin, who on Wednesday said he still couldn’t believe he was successful, said Done worked wonders. Martin said, the stress of the case, which was drawn out over two years due to a scheduling overflow caused by the COVID-19 pandemic, has caused Martin to lose five jobs over the two years.

“When I got that decision, I actually had to leave work,” Martin, who has been working steadily at a local fishing tackle manufacturing company since the end of May, said excitedly. “I couldn’t believe it, and I was overwhelmed. I was shaking, I couldn’t talk, my brain went to mush. I’m very happy with the decision.”

Morelli owns a total of 10 units within five properties in Kingston. He said he wanted to use Martin’s apartment as a new home for his mother, Henriette Morelli, who currently lives in a two-bedroom condominium with her husband, Edwin Morelli, in Saskatoon.”

- Steph Crosier, “Tenant wins at board hearing,” Kingston Whig-Standard. Jul 11, 2022. This was a front page story in the print edition.

///

We are happy that this story is now out in the open for all to see. It won't be the last word on the matter, that's for sure. But it clearly demonstrates why Queen's University professor and faculty association president (as well as former president of the Kingston NDP riding association) Jordan Morelli's N12 eviction notice was thrown out at the LTB. In our opinion, what this stories reveals is that Morelli is willing to exploit the housing crisis for his own financial gain. 

Prior to this instance, there was two previous times where he claimed family members were moving in to units when they never did. He paid these tenants a meagre $3000, money which they quickly burned through with their rent prices hundreds of dollars a month higher. Meanwhile, he charged higher rents to the people moving in: one unit went from $409 to $1150 a month, while another went from $670 to $1200. He made that money back within months. 

Morelli wants to claim he is a victim in all this, and actually goes so far as saying that the landlord tenant laws works well for tenants. But the facts speak for themselves: The LTB rejected his case because they do not believe his story. Additionally, close to 90 percent of tenants at the LTB have no legal representation, and if it weren't for KUT and KCLC supporting Morelli's tenant, Morelli would most likely have someone living in Martin's unit's at double the rent. 

Tenants can win when they stand up and fight. Get to know your neighbours and organize with them! In Martin's case, former tenants stood with Martin to explain what had happened to them after moving out. This sort of solidarity led to Martin staying in his apartment at a rent price he can afford. KUT stands with tenants across the city and will do what we can to help.

- official statement of the Kingston / Katarokwi Union of Tenants, July 12, 2022 (Martin is a member)

/// The tenant union had helped several other tenants of Morelli, who had also been told they would have to move out of his own properties for the same reason of family need, and the communication between tenants allowed them to learn he was using the same line on several tenants - allowing the tenants to resist his efforts or negotiate for better accommodation to leave. Martin’s is the first official victory against this particular landlord, but likely won’t be the last. Of course, Morelli is a self-pitying landlord in all of this, being quoted in the article as saying: “Somehow I’m the bad guy in all of this; they’re trying to paint me as a villain.”  Morelli is hardly the worst landlord in Kingston, Ontario, and nowhere near as powerful as a rental company like Homestead. His tactics are typical of landlords everywhere. The reason why he acts the way he does, and can act the way he does, is at base a structural issue, in which housing is an investment and a means of accumulation rather than a basic right. But Kingston is a smallish town, with a proportionately smallish, vague, fragmented, and often dysfunctional ‘left’, so Morelli’s role has been controversial and increasingly divisive. Notably, it was discovered by the tenant union that his mother, who he has been claiming he was going to move into one of these vacated units, is a retired university professor who likely doesn’t want to live in a tiny basement apartment! 

As the press release from KUT notes, Morelli is a major player in the local political scene, as former riding president for the federal NDP, as secretary of the Kingston and District Labour Council (and had the temerity to send this article to other council members, even after the Council passed a pro-tenant motion!) and at Queen’s University, where he is a professor and head of the faculty association. In those roles, he is a bad faith opponent of tenant rights, student activism, grassroots unionism, and the left-wing of the NDP (as well as the small, overlapping and fractious autonomist, anarchist, communist and decolonial groups in the area). For instance, this was his response to the Ontario government, controlled by Conservatives, capping rent increases!

If there was any justice in the world or social democracy and labour unionism was not so pathetically degenerated, this kind of coverage should get him kicked out of the KDLC or NDP.

[mari-lair]

ahhhhhhhhh thank u for answering the ask! tho there isn't a plot yet, i enjoyed it quite a lot and found it funny that cat!akane is still an asshole to everyone but i think he had a soft spot for aoi and the minamotos and i still wonder where hanako got this formula of turning people into cats and nene being willing to go along so far hmmmmm

but back to terukane – i had this nonsense thought of where some people can see the human-turned-to-cats' human parts like how teru felt someone grabbing him from behind, a legit human hand, and when he turned around real fast he just saw their little cinnamon pawing/clawing at him to get his attention with a wtf u doing look

like idk how this nonsense thought is hilarious to me because while it might be cute and how terukane fell in love with each other because they are vulnerable to each other, it is also how teru might start thinking that holy shit am i a furry lover?? at first and along those lines bwahahahahaahahh

but i also wonder how akane managed to resist his cat instincts? was it out of spite?, a strong will and determination and being stubborn? or was he blessed from a deity like kako who is the god of something? or it could be the first two ahhhahahahahahhahahh

all in all – thanks for answering this! looking forward to seeing ur ideas on this

(Cat Akane AU part 1)

Akane only went to the hotsprings once, able to understand that even though his body is already fully cat, another bath in the cursed water would make his situation even worse, and he refuses to lick himself, so he always takes a bath on the bathroom sinks, feeling cold and miserable and dry on the sun without brushing himself. His hair is a spiky mess because of it. 

Akane still has plenty of cat urges though, which he will indeed resist by pure spite. The first days are the worst. He’ll bite himself when he as much as thinks about chasing a bird, he’ll walk on back paws when he has the energy for it, he’ll end up in high places and feel an incredible urge to jump to the ground, but he goes “shut the fuck up, I would rather die” and nearly fucks up his leg climbing down vertical stairs instead. He refuses to eat the cat food Nene and Tsukasa always leaves for the ‘strays’, even if human food is far harder to get his paws on. He does get used to walking on all four, scratching people and falling of high places but he sees it as his human capability to adapt not a lost to the curse, still overthinking on a daily, refusing to stay still and laze around with the other cats even when he is tired, and not tolerating pets. If you use a baby voice on him, he’ll make sure you won’t be able to have babies.

He is too stressed, spiteful, and proud for this curse to win.

Meanwhile, since Aoi-chan is stressed, she will visit the Cat House once a week, hoping they got news on her missing friend. They obviously lie to her that there is no news, but she still visits this house in the middle of nowhere, cause she likes the copper cat. It baffles everyone that “the cat from hell”. as Mitsuba calls him, will become the sweetest cat you’ve ever seen when Aoi visit, he’ll let her pick him up and purr on her arms, gently pat her cheek and nuzzle her neck when she is sad as well. He isn’t even mad when Aoi says “You’re a good kitty, can I name you Coin?” cause if boping her nose makes her stress diminish, happy he liked the name, he’ll immediately take it as the best nickname possible. Her weekly visits are also the only brushing he gets, even though he heavily discourage her with very gentle bites that are mistaken for him being playful, his touch starved self feeling awkward and embarrassed to be spoiled like that.

Akane bite Nene's hand when she mistakenly thinks he likes the name as it is and tries calling him Coin all softly like Aoi in an attempt to pet him. Poor Nene really wants to pet him, but her cat treats trails don’t work, and sweet words only make Akane look at her in disgust. She is being bullied by a cat, Hanako and Mitsuba always laughs at her for it, even though Hanako's eager attempts to befriend Akane always end in far more violence.

The idea of Teru feeling a human touch at random is so awkward but so funny, I can only picture him in a bar drinking his dread away and getting so drunk he whines to a bartender about it, being given a judgemental look “When was the last time you dated someone? Go get laid, you sad and lonely man.”

But I am too much of a cliche fan to go for it, I love the idea of Teru learning that his pal Cinnamon is a person, but not fully getting it until Akane turns into a very cute boy with a very cute mocking smirk and expressive hands and wow, maybe he has a crush. 

Teru just stares in their first proper meeting cause he is gay panicking over having slept in the same bed as a cute boy and sharing his dinner with him and so on, so on, but Akane's view doesn’t change too much. The first thing this blunt boy, who is almost a full head shorter than Teru, says once he’s a human is “oh wow, you’re so small now, sir.” cause Akane is used to Teru being a giant that can carry him on his shoulders. He does find it weird to be able to casually look at Teru’s face though, it used to be something he only got to see properly when they went to sleep next to each other (Akane hasn’t slept in a bed in ages, when Teru offer to share his bed, Akane goes ‘fuck it, I miss having pillows’) or a view he only got if he suffered the humiliation of being picked up like a fucking baby, blinded by the urge to claw Teru’s eyes until the bastard let him go to properly appreciate the view.

So Akane thinks he is very beautiful. But it doesn’t change his respect for the guy, or that Teru is as competent as he is unbearable.

Both get used to the change, finding it easy to talk to each other. Teru finds it super cute how he could detect some of ‘Cinnamon’ habits in Akane’s face. He does need to try to get used to when Akane pats his cheek from habit to shut him up, and it feels far bigger than a little paw. Warm and human.

Aoi is happy to see him again! After four weeks of Akane going missing, she had been expecting the worst, sure no one could keep her stubborn friend quiet for so long, so she swallowed her pride and hugged him tightly, not letting go for three full minutes.

[growling]

part 3 time i love yaoi

wouldn't Zero, like, want to play XB rn though? I mean he did implement it in various nefarious ways in Neo Tokyo like Yo I don't think that you're doing what you think you're doing here

Zero I'm in gay love with you

We're gonna lose aren't we

Ohh we're going to Shinagawa city isn't that where Ichinose Kazuma is...... you know that one guy who's really gay for Zero from the the trailers and the twitter you know Ichinose righ

animation time!!

they got cool art/models in this game :3 shame its a gacha. you could have been so much more babygirl.......

Hey look at Zero he took his cape thingy off... he's a normal boy now. ok now the mask take that fuckibg mask off we all know you cant see shit

"... I am having a nice chat with Yo. Such interruptions from people irrelevant are rather displeasing." ARGHHHHRHRRRHRH ARF ARF AWOOOOOOOOOO

sorry whenever I hear Zero being weird about Yo again ill just get on all fours and start barking

awwwww and Zero wants to teach Yo the rules as they play he's so nice and considerate you guysss <33333333

Zero is a true gamer. the truest of all. Oh and also I didn't expect him to actually not have played XB before himself.................... inchresting..................................................................................

(but he really seems confident he'll win regardless because he's Zero)

"But that aside, I'm actually much more worried about your feelings. [...] If I don't hold back a bit, you'd look too pathetic." whatever man keep just saying this shit to him whateverr.....

nice figure dudee

WAIT NO WAY THIS EXTREME BASEBALL IS ACTUALLY IS A DEBATE SHOWDOWN LIKE IN DANGANRONPA SLASH RAIN CODE NO FUCKING WAY LMAOOOO

XB lore. "and losers have to obey the winners" dude ill lose to Zero so hard after hearing that tbhhhh

oh we are soooooo losing. we are losing so bad rn he just said something which makes it impossible we'll win lmaoo

Zero animation Zero animation look at Zero. this is so cool.I like looking at things on my screen

oh he's a fast boy. oh he's a FLEXIBLE boy. nice ass shot. moving on

i watched so hard i forgor to be a sports commentator for a second,

Zero said girlie. Zero said girlie

"hmm.... I'm actually a pretty dark person..." he's so edgy. i can't. save me Zero Tribe Nine

yayyyyy lets get serious with Zero :D

banger theme

can I kill Takinogawa yet

hmmm is Q like, that one "dead" guy that looks exactly like Zero. Cause I feel like if it was Zero that'd be too obvious..........

ggod i wisj hed touch me like that

who said that

oh zero you silly guy <33

"I feel happy even while you're glaring at me, you know... I hope that you can also enjoy our game, Yo. You don't have to worry. Just leave everything to me... I promise you. This will not be a boring game." I fucking can't I what do you want me to say anymore. What is there to say

I was supposed to be working on that AVoS rewrite and yet Zero's got me in a chokehold since yesterday... god damn it Zero!!!!

WHAT IS ZEROS DEALLLLLLL WITH YO

wait....... he made everyone on the surface play death game shit but only so him and Yo could do it????? So he just did that just for them????????????????

"Yo... you are indeed special to me, but to become THE ONE, that will depend on your performance. [...] It means you are not the only special player who has the potential to become my opponent."

oooooooh the Numbers!!! I see Ichinose.... he's like Number One isn't he.......

"There are only 8 of them now, I feel like I can accomodate for one or two more. The game I want to play with you, isn't on the same level as the ones those garbage players play. (...) if you continue to stay active till the very end... then it will finally be the time! Become the best player and prove your worth. Then, we shall enjoy the best game!"

blushes.... why are we so special to you...... also what is that Game you keep talking about

XG?? how many X[letter] are we gonna have lmao.....

YO JUST TOLD ZERO HE HAS ZERO FRIENDS. IS THAT GONNA LEAVE A MARK...

its ok zero i can introduce you to the wonderful world of aplatonicism. just take my hand

ohhhhhhh that stung huh. that left a mark huh. zero's gonna go cry himself to sleep that night

"... Ahh, I'm at my limits... I want to break you so badly! I want to crush you to bits! But then all will be wasted! But... but but but but but! That also seems to be a really intriguing idea!" I don't think Yo should have said this chat I think we broke him . He also sounds like he's literally about to scream cry lmao props to the va kdjdhfj

me when i get so mad i start flying

"YOOO"

ooooooo his mask is breaking!! show that eye off boy

hmmmmmmm

we are ending this part just as Zero has successfully projected horrific gore into Yo's mind for shits and giggles SDJGHDJKKDGHJSKFJDKSLIFUKGJFJDKSFJH

oh wait i forgor. tribe nine beta lol

Zero my angel I'd recognize that voice maybe not anywhere but like in some places

"kuronaka got 10 gold" *EAR BLASTING 9 HOUR LONG FANFARE*

hmmmmmmmmmm.. not saying anything but narrowing my eyes thoughtfully

they're trying to fnaf pizzeria simulator my ass, unfortunately for them I am an incredibly clever smart intelligent wise boy (looked at the art on tweeter)

they put kuronaka in the generic rpg torture dungeons💔💔💔 get well soon

shut the fuck up boyyyy look at the claypot. loook at my claypot boy

jesus stop jumpscaring me if i die my grandma will sue

im calling it now. lady goddess is just zero (and if so: gender win)

$laymate

if it does end up being zero it will be so fucking funny. please. let this manifest. me when i put some random dude in the generic rpg torture dungeons and make him look at claypots forever as form of foreplay also i pretend to be a statue

its that blue hair motherfucker from the promos or whatever

this is so fucking funny im tearing up. im tearing up. also they just implied that i was right. this is so fucking funny. vidio game brainwash yaoi. zero you silly man i desire you carnally

"well its not unusual for this man to do this kind of thing" please tell me more about zero's crimes against humanity .

forgot to mention this earlier but of course the protag has amnesia. not a proper kodaka game without an amnesiac protagonist. this is not a complaint

this is so funny. this is so funny.

redguy yellowguy leave that poor fucker alone. blueguy grayguy why are you just staring tell them to leave that poor fucker alone this is probably not how you approach a dude with amnesia who has been stuck in the generic rpg brainwash torture dungeon for an unspecified period of time

3d time. fuck that boy up guards induce a panic attack in this man

and the torture dungeons were just some random medium sized platform..... help me thats so embarrassing for kuronaka!!

"the village you were saying [sic] were all just drawings on the floor and on the walls!" THAT'S SO EMBARRASSING.... KURONAKA THAT'S SO EMBARASSING......

HE WAS 2 FUCKING YEARS STUCK IN THE GAME LMAOOOOOOOOOO THAT'S SO EMBARASSING FOR HIM

ok. ill stop being mean to him. i promise i will be nice and understanding of his situation from now on. it must be very hard and traumatizing for him.

LMAOOOOOOO HE LOOKS SO FUCKING STUPID THIS IS SO FUNNY. FUCKING IDIOT XDDDDDDDDD

also buy him brown contacts pls

ZEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fucking look at him this shit looks biblical. look at him descending onto the mortals. this is fucking jesus imagery

nice robot hands. they're not attached yet but i will force him to become a cyborg no matter how many limbs i must detach from his body

i am not ready to hit unpause. but also im yearning.

wait look at his hand pose.... awww look at him i want him carnally

alright alright whatever im unpausing.......

so 24 city is just named like that because it's the 24th city and they ran out of ideas

24 city must be a shit place to live in, a strong breeze knocks you over and you fall one kilometer onto the pavement

"... but who would have thought that there is such a surreal area here, designed just like a video game?" zero. zero would have. that man is all about vidio game addiction i called it once and ill call it again

and he called him "the masked man" i fucking cant i need t. i need to take a breather okay i cant take this anymore

zero lore listen closely now this will be on the test (instead of listening starts imagining zero touching me in a bus and gets so hrard ii passkdf uout )

Kuronaka likes tea. +1 for Kuronaka I love tea

Zero the robot enjoyer

alright, Iroha is gonna return Kuronaka's smartphone next time and I'll end it here :] twas a pleasure. transcending experience