#and which ones receive it with love
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Posting personal pieces that are deeply reflective makes you find out who your friends are in a lot of ways
#ive been thinking a lot about how what I create is treated by the people around me#and which ones receive it with love#and which ones barely acknowledge it exists#what and who is interested in my writing and other creations#no one is obligated of course and I would rather no one feel the need to say something just to keep up appearances#and not everyone I consider a friend has something to say#but it is very telling when routinely a small set just...never says shit#I am a selfish beast I crave feedback when I share what I've made because it's like fuel#this also isnt about anyone on tumblr to be clear this is Elsewhere#i know i will never get over like 10 notes on a tumblr art drop
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"distant relative" i assume you are referring to my father?
#happy father's day everyone!#mine was fucking terrible he received a C- rating at best#and that is me being fucking GENEROUS with the grading rubric yeah#anyway i love and respect anyone who feels the need to quietly publicly shame their negligent father figure on anonymous social media#there should be a RateMyProfessor website but it's RateMyParents#it would serve no possible practical purpose but it would be as potentially psychologically scalding as a ghost pepper and/or supernova so.#do it#.......that could actually be so interesting#comparing and contrasting the reviews of siblings and half-siblings and step-siblings#the differences in parental perception between the Black Sheep/Scapegoat and the Golden Child and the Middle Child and So On#(on that note why are the two main idioms for being blacklisted in your own family both *livestock* related who laid that groundwork)#ANYway. back to RateMyFather#this one dad gets nine 5-star reviews and one absolutely SCATHING no-stars review#which mathematically leaves him with a 4.5 rating BUT#the main thing you are left wondering is how did one dad end up with TEN reviews that is in itself an Indictment
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🍒🤍
#enstars#my art#ensemble stars#fanart#femstars#shu itsuki#mika kagehira#shumika#new shu fit just dropped#cherie jubilee shu#UNICORN MIKA TOO WAHH I LOVE HER#i wanna draw out both their full designs#But we will see#Idk this is such a weird lineup of my designs#But i thought it would be cute#dont ask me how these two would meet I DONT HAVE AN ANSWER#oh but what if it was like a nutcracker type situation where shu receives a music box with a spinning cute unicorn girl#and then one day she comes to life like that would be CUTE#idk we will see#Thank you for reading my yapping.. i Hope this shu turned out pretty and cute. I like her rn which is good news
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Bit late but in honour of Pretty No Susume I present the Pretty 5 gender scale
#sab actually posts#Enstars#pretty 5#kagehira mika#aira shiratori#tomoe hiyori#himemiya Tori#narukami Arashi#I posted this on Twitter a couple days ago and they LOVED this post so I figured I’d put it over here as well#and when I say loved I truly mean it - this is the biggest hit tweet I’ve ever had#like it breached containment and the KR and JP enstarries found it it’s SERIOUS#and yet for all my efforts I’ve so far received only 0 comments and 4 public quotes - one of which was in Korean#and for as much engagement as it got there was so little ENGAGEMENT it kinda saddened me but I know tumblr is better than that#so I just gotta pray people actually find this and enjoy it as much as Twitter did
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do we think the stosh reunion will be devastating…… i do
it will be... ill hate it.
josh is having ptsd of the last words stef asked him while they were making their last love
#stef has had enough of trying to receive josh's overthrown pitches#it's !#OVER !!#now josh stands outside his window like a wet dog#staring.#replaying those last words stef said to him while making their last love (if u could even call it that)#is it in yet..#... yes my sweet prince stef#pls jsut one more chance#...#safe to say. im not rdy#but tbh im not bcs i feelnlike it'll be very pr esque#which eill hurt more than a heated exchange of words bcs they'll act like what they had was nothing#when they both know it's still something#ARGH#oct 6... divorce court finalization...#im not ready friend...#.. im Scared 😭#josh allen blank stare 'this is all i got' face when stef asks if it's in#shoutout beloved moot for showing me this im disturbed
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If you have a moment, you should go check out TricksterMelon on Twitter :) I hope you like it <3
I am speechless
#I saw your comment on AO3 and YOU!! YOU'RE THE ANON WHO COMMISSIONED A COVER FOR SIREN'S CALL THAT TIME#YOU'RE LIKE A MASKED ZORRO SWEEPING INTO MY LIFE WITH THESE INCREDIBLE GIFTS#I...I don't even know what to say#I'm still trying to wrap my head around that you got me this#and for THIS FIC which is so dear to me#and WHAT A BREATHTAKING COVER!!!!!#THE COLOURS#THE *KISS*#THE NAVY FLEET AND THE CANNONBALLS FLYING IN THE BACKGROUND#and SHANKS AND MAKINO#I know this is for Long Live but honestly this could be the cover of Shanties as a whole#it's just...perfect#this is seriously one of THE most beautiful artworks I've ever received#I don't have Twitter but can you or someone please tell the artist how much I love this???#TricksterMelon if you see this I am in AWE#oh my god I need to learn bookbinding so that I can PUT THIS ON THE ACTUAL COVER OF THIS FIC#I am so incredibly touched by this anon THANK YOU SO MUCH<3<3<3#Shanks x Makino#otp: sing me sea shanties#this made me so happy I...am just going to sit here and feel for a bit<3#Shanties art
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I CANT USE CSS ON ARTFIGHT...............
#I WAS REALLY HOPING TO FIX THE FUCKING. PARAGRAPH WIDTH. SIGH#idk why but it stretches across the ENTIRE page like. it takes up the full width of the browser and it BOTHERS ME. ON ALL THE PAGES#i could try manually putting shift breaks but im worried it might not look so good on mobile. ugghh... auyggghhh.....#im already learning CSS and API so i thought i could put it to good use but. AUGH#this whole time ive had to go into the inspect panel myself and change the padding so i dont have to read the length of the screen#like a fucking typewriter... i would have also loved to use custom fonts and animations......#i did find a guide for BBCode which the site uses on default and it covers basic styling but its not the same. sniffle#you CAN unlock CSS if you donate $25 to the page which seems fair. and if i could do it i would but. i do not have any way of#sending or receiving money online </3 i really need to figure out how to do that so i can set up comms like i said i would last summer#but it intimidates me.... and im already kept on a short leash when it comes to that so it feels like a lot of things could go wrong#i think toyhouse allows CSS or some sort of code...?? i remember seeing some oc pages with custom layouts#if thats the case i'll try fiddling with it but im not very familiar with using toyhouse so thatll take a while#(thanks again for the code sal ^_^ ill put it on my pin once its ready but im trying to learn my way around the site heh ;;)#at least i can use my pixel dividers.. ive been digging around for pixels to use and found some really cute ones#yapping
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i don't remember how i stumbled across this interview but i've never seen anyone mention it so i'm dropping it here <3 it's a little dated but still like super valuable and a decently in depth look at higuchi-sensei's previous works and how she works and thinks as a mangaka... personally i think it's the most i've ever learned from an interview of hers. super interesting stuff :0)
#oofuri#higuchi asa#yuku tokoro#yasashii watashi#kazoku no sorekara#tw: suicide mention#and maybe i did jump out of my chair at the yuku tokoro mention. but i'll never tell#i love how she says basically u can't truly know a character without getting to know their family as well. a story progresses best this way#that's why she draws everyone's parents and siblings so thoughtfully in her work#wow and also.#that line abt how - after yasashii watashi - she received a letter from a fan saying it'd helped dissuade them from taking their own life?#and i think she says: 'and I remember thinking that maybe I drew this work because I wanted this answer' (?????)#very much used a translation app but#i respect her so much#pls skim if you'd like#ok one more. the line at the very end ->#'when they [abe & mihashi] met they both had their complexes. but after spending 3yrs together theyll arrive at....?'#ok well. boyfriendhood. next question.#she's so embarrassed at how long oofuri is taking her wkjakdjkjsd queen lift ur head...#i think she says something like 'homosexuality alcoholism and physical disabilities are all subjects I wanted to depict but it might be -#misleading to say im attracted to them' abt yuku tokoro. which i think is epic bc i take it to mean like. she wants to#represent these themes w/o fetishizing them#but she drew yuku tokoro first AND THEN had to go looking 'around the world' for somewhere to publish it bc it wasn't 'commercial'#so she just wanted to write it...........her mind....................... ok my god i could talk abt this forever
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oh so alisaie’s exaggerated bully behavior is 80% fanon. saying this she casually picks up a large rock
#say one thing wrong to me and you will have a wonderful few days with the rock#if angry silly girls have 100 fans etc if they have 0 fans i have died#sorry i saw a YouTube meme i vehemently disliked on principle and got mad at the only child behavior-#kipspeak#she is just short tempered and uses anger to mask other more ‘shameful’ emotions!!! alphy did the same thing with just deciding not#to express them. which is still not good and I think why he breaks and ends up teary so often now#this shortness does not translate to actually being mean to people. she only uses being mean as a shield for herself and being snarky#Is just fun for her. it’s fun for Me. you have to inconsequentually tease people or they’ll never learn to laugh at themselves#the twins and thancred 🫵 do this thing where they have big emotions but they don’t want anyone to SEE they have big weird emotions#so alphy pretends he doesn’t have them under a veneer of dignity and alisaie pretends the emotions are Something Else. thancred is#just so emotionally constipated he has trouble expressing anything. he’s got enough baggage for a flatbed#anyways. alisaie is such a compassionate and kind girl and she learned how to make snarky jokes and went ham. and she hates appearing sad o#weak or vulnerable so she blocks it off with an unapproachable emotion so no one pities her and they maybe get on with the plot#it is in fact also great at getting ppl to move away from the sad or embarrassing topic. even if the tradeoff is being more offputting#she would never (grabs youtube meme) she would never seriously bully her brother. this is sibling ribbing only. Cain instinct#just leave her be she is learning how to snark humor and she loves it she loves being sharp. alphy has wit he just keeps it close#my brother didn’t learn how to tell or receive a joke until he was 14 he took everything so seriously. he can do it now though and he’s#HILARIOUS. Don’t tell him I said that. my man knows exactly where the funny points are even if he hasn’t learned when to stop yet#too many tags. Whatever. jokey snark alisaie who sometimes compliments is happy alisaie grouchy snappy angry alisaie is way too stressed#very easy way to tell between the two. even alphy can tell between the two I believe! He tends to rib back in protest if they’re having fun#and try to stop her if they’re not having fun. case in point ‘what is that supposed to mean?!’ vs ‘alisaie ryne was only trying to help.’#I know they’re twins but that’s such an intensely older sibling thing to do that it reels me#LONG TAGS AND THREE EDITS TO ADD ON SHORT I resent this stereotype taken too far into ooc behavior. it happened with nya#It will happen again and as a postscript let me regale you with Things U Can Notice About Character Motivation and Actions—#I’m not done let me s#she and raha are friends now I decree. ‘haha you like me’ SPUTTERING PROTEST FROM BOTH
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🔥 MY ART FIGHT ATTACK FOR THIS YEAR (PART 2) 🔥
check out all of these ocs they’re so great and their stories are all WONDERFUL!! and if you like any of the characters here, please go send your love to the creators listed. some of them dont have tumblr but i still recommend yall to check their other social media account hehe ❤️
here are the names of the owner’s OCs!⬇️
SoundHaptics
leni-illust
kenjakuuuu_
Dahyuniie
zirkkun
kalenya
_NERIAIRI_
jasjanken
Gladys_isglad
TheAnxiousAuthor
pinketeer
amaimint
aikoo3
just-here09
biologicz
Keroooo
DawRushesIn
Vampirelily_ii
sinae
#theres one attack ive done but the owner reqsted not to post their ocs other than af account#i just wanna say thank you so much to each and every person who participated in Art Fight 2024#this was my first year joining the event and i had an incredible time drawing other people's OCs and receiving amazing art in return#i truly enjoyed creating art for your characters and i might be joining again next year hopefully im free to draw that time!#im amazed that i managed to complete 50 attacks#including revenge and friendly fire ones which was quite a challenge but also lots of fun :D#it was a huge challenge for myself to draw 1-3 pieces a night and clear my bookmarks on the site#but i am very glad i did it and love the rainbow of OCs I drew for others! thank you everyone for the wonderful month 💖#team seafoam#seafoam vs stardust#art fight#artfight#art fight 2024#af attack#af revenge#my art#art by me
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ok laplaces angel with seabury let me cook let me cook okay the king is the little “it’s the norm for animals” voice since he’s the main root of most if not all of seabury’s political beliefs or something idk and maybe the main thing is him having this whole realization that perhaps his beliefs don’t exactly perfectly align with his morals and that he was never in the right to begin with??? (with the loyalism thing and him being a pacifist) because yk the whole “oooooh could you take a look at me am i bad am i bad am i bad am i really that bad” right guys right haha right????/)/) please ive been having these thoughts conjuring up in my head for several months but idk how to put it into words and still be coherent 😭😭😭 this is so cringe ok bye don’t even read this (or do……😳😳😳😳)
listen to it pleaaaaase 🥺
#im seabury’s number one fan which means everything i say about him is TRUTH and you HAVE TO listen to me!!!!! /j#i loooove laplaces angel so much you guys definitely my fav on the normal album 🤤#i am cringe but i am NOT free#sometimes i forget the guy i rant about was actually just a bad white guy irl instead of a cool and pretty white guy#please just LET ME COOK HEED MY CALL#THE ONLY ONES IN NEED OF LOVE ARE THOSE WHO DONT RECEIVE ENOUGH SO EVIL ONES SHOULD GET A LITTLE MORE…..#i could be misinterpreting the entire song right now wouldn’t that be really funny#<- not that i was ever really going by the actual meaning of the song in the first place#the only reason i have the morals bit is literally because of a part of an interview (podcast) where thayne made a silly joke#about seabury changing his ways and siding with the revolution (which wouldn’t happen and didn’t but i think it’s a cool idea and concept)#girl he made ONE JOKE 😭😭😭#please this is so long bye#samuel seabury#hamilton#hamilton musical
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patreon is a mess, but ko-fi has the same systems for a lot less of a headache. so! i now have a "patreon". it's very simple - i have a few misc pieces up for people who donate once, but mostly i will be uploading extra doodles and things i don't finish or generally think suit my social medias up for people who pay $5 a month to my kofi page! there's already a ton of stuff up - mostly doodles and things i never finished or haven't posted yet, but a couple WIPs for things that hopefully do get finished.
i would appreciate your support!
#patreon#kofi#artist support#art#dat me#and you can still use it as a one-time tip jar!! this is just an extra thing for the Diehard Cozy Enthusiasts. which doesn't sound real but#they do exist and i love them dearly#i also had to bump my minimum one-time payment up to two dollars because with processing fees sadly $1 is... like 50 cents 😭#there's just the one tier. i never wanted to do anything fancy with a patreon anyway#i've been using kofi for Years and i've both received and given money through it. generally its just a website i really like#patreon takes too big of a cut and has too much weird shit going on. kofi is for artists plain and simple. so i like it a lot more!
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i feel it's so fucking stupid and ungrateful but it still hurts a little when someone gifts me something i just don't like. i don't know. i know it's dumb and inaccurate to astrain that much meaning to a simple gift, but it feels kinda like they don't know me. i guess it feels like people don't see me, like a reminder that the person i reflect and the person i feel like are incredibly different.
#two fairly recent examples jump to mind#last year my class did a secret santa#the guy who got my name barely knew me so instead he asked our litterature teacher for tips#i was doing an effort to participate a lot in her classes and discuss stuff and i felt like she was an adult i could really trust#and adult who Gets It#and she picked just. the wrong gift. a classical philosophy essay.#stuff i hate reading. stuff i hate thinking about.#i said thank you to both of them and tried to read it during christmas break still. but i was right. i hated it.#and this year's christmas#recently i tried patching things up with my parents and we are a lot more communicative now#so they've opened up that my demand not to receive any gifts was painful to them#so we had an agreement: we write open-hearted letters to each other on christmas.#and they can gift me something if they'd like but no pressure if they don't find anything they feel would be a good gift#bc i myself opened up about the whole ''inaccurate gift'' thing being one of the reasons i dislike receiving stuff#and guess what. christmas comes. they got me a printed card from an artist whose work we saw at a local art thing earlier that year.#that artist does mainly either plants or nice architecture. stuff i love.#they picked the ONE work of hers that doesn't look like that. some reinterpretation of the great wave of kanagawa#a piece which i dislike with a passion for aesthetic reasons#i had promised i'd be honest if their gift missed the mark but tbh i couldn't. it's just an aesthetic thing it's completely begnin.#it's not like they spent lots or tried to pick something that was USEFUL#so i smiled and the picture is hanging with other stuff in my room#and i thanked them and i can't express how genuinely glad i am we have a better relationship#but man i felt my heart break a little under the tree in that moment#idk#i know it's silly but it makes me feel weird. and cold.#broadcasting my misery#vent
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new Naiakiir ref for art fight!!
here's my profile if anyone's interested in drawing her this year or just following me <3
#naiakiir#silverstarsart#art fight#the only other year I did art fight everyone who attacked me also received an attack from me if that sweetens the deal#by which i mean all but one of the attacks i received were revenges so ig it doesn't actually prove my own revenge record#but i would love to be able to do more revenges myself this year!!#anyway#now i just need to make a new ref for chase....
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My FL main went through some really weird, organic development over the...oh god, I think it's been five years since I started playing now.
So my main is named Skadi Larkin. They are a little bastard. They started out extremely 2D; I named them after my favorite Norse goddess and the protagonist of the book I was reading at the time. I originally wanted to make them female like both of their namesakes, but the second I saw the third-gender option, I thought it was too good to pass up. This is where they got their primary base characterization as a mad scientist who wanted to Cause Problems.
Then I started the Nemesis ambition and forgot which option I'd chosen for who I was trying to avenge, so they lost both their lover and their older brother under tragic circumstances (only the lover was killed by Nemesis's antagonist, though).
Then I got an Exceptional Friendship and had to give my tragic backstory in order to gain entry to the House of Chimes. Skadi pulled said tragic backstory (orphaned in a hansom accident) more or less out of their ass, but it did establish that their parents are dead.
Somewhere down the line, I realized that technically Skadi is a linguist, since the Correspondence is a language, and I made that their profession on the Surface as well.
Around this time, I started working on character designs for my fan comic. I got really into messing around with skin tone, and somewhere along the line thought it would be fun to draw Skadi (who was originally white) with darker skin, and it stuck.
Then I abruptly realized I was taking a lot of options that increased my Melancholy, and almost all of them were based on the Surface. So now Skadi has a longing for the Surface.
I left the game for a few years, but somewhere during this stretch of time, and I don't know how this happened, but I decided Skadi was now Native American; specifically, Metis. I changed their design to incorporate a sash woven in a style characteristic of the Metis, which also added a bit of color to their design (which was mostly black or grey at this point).
During this time, I started incorporating Skadi into my fan comic. This would eventually lead me to actually flesh out their backstory in greater detail. When I started playing the game again, I also created my first alt by total accident (long story), and I decided to weave her backstory with Skadi's.
So Skadi is in the interesting position of being an Indigenous person who is what we'd probably consider Two-Spirit today but they'd just call "Bollocks to that gender crap". They never belonged on the Surface, since the Metis are in a bit of a liminal space compared to other tribes due to their interesting background (the Metis are the descendants of French settlers and Indigenous inhabitants, mostly Cree), and Skadi exists in a liminal space within that liminal space due to only being half-Metis and raised primarily in white culture, although they still maintained a connection to it through their late mother. They also never belonged because no one else on the Surface outside of the communities they already felt isolated from would ever accept them for their gender. London gave them a chance to express one of those, but not both, and despite knowing that the Surface hates them just for existing, they still long to return.
#fallen london#fallen london oc#mild fallen london spoilers ig#there's a really interesting dichotomy with all of my fl characters honestly#skadi's is just probably the most blatant#umbra belacqua (my shadowy alt) is someone who both loves very fiercely and is capable of immense cruelty at the same time#in her backstory she had the husband of her ex-fiancee (who left her at the altar) murdered because she couldn't let go of her ex's betraya#said ex is my persuasive alt and is both very socially gregarious and extremely withdrawn#he probably won't ever get a spouse just because he can't bring himself to love someone else after what happened the last time#and he had very good reason for leaving umbra because he could never love her the way she wanted#and he felt that the sympathy she would receive from his family would more than make up for the heartbreak#since umbra is obsessed with gaining power and prestige and he came from an influential family#and knew that running away with the person he really loved would get him disowned#(he doesn't know umbra killed his husband btw)#my dangerous alt is my persuasive alt's sister#she's trans and badly overcompensating for it by refusing to wear anything except feminine clothing#because it hasn't quite gotten through to her yet that no one in Fallen London particularly cares about her gender expression#and she feels like the only way she can be seriously considered a woman is if she does everything she can to look like one#which causes her a good few problems because her one true passion is violence and that's not usually considered a very feminine hobby#then their younger brother (my watchful alt) is someone ironically very disinclined to violence who resorts to it anyways#the only people he's actually going to try to kill are the ones he has to kill for his ambition#and he's not very happy about it but he doesn't have much of a choice#because while he might not like bloodshed his murdered spouse was an anarchist who definitely did#and he's determined to do right by his memory by...killing a lot of people apparently#he is not a terribly mentally stable man and when i finally get around to making his account#he's going to have a massive nightmares problem that he refuses to deal with and keeps ending up in the royal beth for it#tl;dr all my fallen london characters are going through it and have overly long and complicated backstories#my main just happens to have the most overly long and complicated of them all
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if you've ever sent me an art request or an ask and I haven't gotten to it yet I apologize, I'll get to it eventually, I've been trying to wrap my head around finding the motivation to get through projects while also deciding which ones to pursue first
so those tangled art requests, that ghostflower au request, I'll get to those as soon as I can I promise ^^ bc I really loved those asks! They're amazing asks! Genuinely some of my favorites I've gotten so far.
#sorry I take so long on those#I admit that it isn't that the asks themselves take long for me to complete but its just that motivation#as well as there being Things I want to make and complete and share but I get a little overwhelmed with#deciding which ones I should prioritize over others i.e. which ones will take longer and which ones will take quicker#tangled#ghostflower#hope this doesn't discourage ppl from sending me asks#was really worried that ppl would get tired of waiting for me to answer asks and decide to quit sending me any#because I love receiving and answering asks so much#fanart#my art
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