#and when im feeling adventurous ill go back

[mit0bee]

ℍ𝕌𝕊𝔹𝔸ℕ𝔻!

Calling the twst boys your husband!

Characters: Leona Kingscholar, Azul Ashengrotto, Idia Shroud, Malleus Draconia

warnings: fem!reader, no beta we die like men, yuu!reader, harassment (leonas part), pre-book 7 malleus

a/n: hi im very sick take this unfinished work from my drafts (I PROMISE ILL MAKE MORE OF THIS I JUST CANT LOOK AT A SCREEN ANYMORE 💔) plz tell me if theres any inaccuracies since i do not have the energy to read it through

also it got glitched out this morning when i tried to use my phone to finish it so now theres bullet points everywhere

It wasn't actually intentional when you called him your husband, more of a spur of the moment thing.

During a (n unwilling) adventure to Sam's, a guy had come up to you. Of course, being the mysterious transfer from another world had garnered you some popularity. One such consequence were people like him.

"Hey. You're that transfer girl, right?" The boy asked. He looked like a badly designed sleazeball from a basic anime; dyed hair, quite a few piercings, and a look on his face that just screamed incel.

"Uh. Yeah." You looked between the milk you had in your hand, the guy, and Leona, who was out of earshot, eyeing a selection of meat Sam had on display. "Why?" You could practically feel the dread in your gut. He obviously wasn't trying to be friends. Or, at least, not the good kind of friends.

"I was just wondering..." Smirking, he took a few steps to close the gap between the two of you, "Some of my friends and I were going to have a little party down in the woods behind the school. We could use some entertainment."

"Er...." Your head tilted downwards in fluster. This guy didn't seem like the type to take no for an answer. Even if you tried to pull the 'I have a boyfriend', he probably wouldn't listen, "My.... husband and I had plans." You blurted out. It was a split second decision, but there was no way this guy would go after a married woman. Right?

"Oh, husband." You shot Leona a look; one that begged for help. He turned from where he had been very focused, and noticed the sleazy guy pestering you. His ears flattened against his head, and his expression shifted from curiosity to irritation. "Come over here."

The nameless guy looked very close to pissing himself when he saw just who you were referring to. The Leona Kingscholar. But he had a wife? Since when?!

"Oh. Uh. Him?" The guy asked, almost unbelieving. There was no way someone like him would be tied down. He could barely go to class, much less commit to someone!

But, as if by fate, the lazy lion gave a smug smirk and rested his hand over your shoulder. "What's up, wife?" He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the crown of your head. "This guy buggin' ya?"

You smiled knowingly, "I don't know. Are you?" Your tone wasn't one to be underestimated. All three of you knew what was going down. The only difference between You and Leona, and the guy was that the guy couldn't do anything to refute your claim.

"N-No, ma'am!" The guy stiffened, which made Leona let out a huff of amusement, "I'll be on my way now!" He announced, running off with his tail between his legs.

You and Leona were left in silence for the next few moments, both of you not wanting or having anything to say. It was Leona, though, who broke the silence.

"Husband?"

"I don't wanna talk about it." You faced your lover with redder cheeks than before, "He was getting on my nerves, and it was the quickest way for him to leave me alone." You sighed, your eyes trailing from Leonas emerald ones to the wooden floor of the shop, "I know we haven't talked about it. Sorry..."

Leona rolled his eyes at your change in demeanor. You went from confident to bashful in only the span of a minute or two. "Whaddya talking about? I never said I wouldn't mind getting married, so don't apologize." He stated, keeping his arm around your shoulders.

"Wha...?" You gazed back up at him with shock, your mouth slightly ajar. You would accept him not wanting to get married, and it was a real possibility you had prepared for in the past. Now he's stating he might want to?

He didn't explain further, and opted to (surprisingly gently) lead you out of the store. "Let's go." He said, "I'll get Ruggie to finish the trip."

------------

"Sam. What is this?"

"It's a wedding present, my little imp!" Sam presented you with a large purple box. It had a glittery black ribbon tied into a perfect bow at its plateau. "Don't think I didn't see what you and the Savanaclaw housewarden were doing in my shop a few days ago!"

You took the box carefully. Knowing Sam, just about anything could be inside. It could be the best thing you could ever receive, but it also could be a load of crap you'd never use.

"Look here!" Sam lifted up two items from inside the box. One was an iridescent stone, while the other looked like a black ticket with gold accents. He held out the stone, "This one is a lucky charm! Perfect for newlyweds, right?" Then, he held out the ticket, "And this gets you a 1% discount at any Sam's Mystery Shop locations in all of Twisted Wonderland! Terms and Conditions apply."

You smiled, but felt the irritation in your body growing. You and Leona weren't actually getting married. It was just a topic of discussion now. But, the items might come in handy around Ramshackle, and you'd take all the help you could get. It wasn't like everything would be useless, right?

You decided to grit your teeth and bear it, "Thank you, Sam. Really." You let him place the two items back in the box, "We'll be sure to use all of this." You quickly turned on your heel to escape.

"Oh, and tell the kitty I said hi!" He called out as you left. Once you were gone, he placed a hand on his cheek with a sigh.

"Ah, young love."

Azul has a lot of business partners.

With all of those partners comes lots of exhausting meetings. His only escape from all of it is you.

Though, that doesn't mean your opposed to playing a prank or two on him to lift his spirits.

Azul dropped down onto his (your shared at this point) bed, and you couldn't help the snicker that you let out at this rare side of him.

"Rough day?" You asked. One of your hands dropped from your book to find purchase in his hair. He let out a relaxed groan, slowly moving his way from the side of the bed to lay on top of you.

"You wouldn't believe. Dozens of grown men and not even one can solve a simple problem." He sighed, remembering the horrid, stale meeting he had to endure, "They're leading me to believe most landers are like this."

You closed your book with a crisp clap, setting it on the safe right by his bed. Instead, you devoted your time to messing with his well-kept hair. "Not all of them. I'm an exception, right? As your wife?"

"That's true-" He paused, your words sinking on him like a heavy weight. His face exploded into a coral pink, and he inelegantly picked himself up onto all fours, looking into your eyes with confusion and maybe a little glee. "What...? Wife..? As in- Us?" One of his hands frantically pointed between the two of you.

"Unless you don't want to get married to a foolish lander." Pouting, you knew he'd take the bait. Hook, line, and sinker. "It's fine. I get it. Species racism, you know?"

Desperately, he shook his head. "No! That's not it at all!" He brought his face dangerously close to yours, "I just wasn't expecting it." As if realizing how close you were, he averted his eyes from yours, "...I was supposed to receive my grandmothers ring. After graduation."

After such an honest confession, you felt your resolve for the prank crumble into a million pieces. You wrapped your arms around him tightly, earning a surprised yelp from him. "Azul!" Is all you could manage to articulate.

"....Y-Yes, my love?" His voice was muffled from being so close to you, but you could still hear the worry in his tone. It didn't make you feel any more calm, though, and you squeezed him even harder.

"I think we need to get married right now."

"What?!"

-------------

The next morning was surprisingly uneventful. The only thing you could notice of slight difference was the weird looks you got from the twins, and the slightly softer way Azul treated you. It was only that evening that everything shifted on its axis.

You were waiting in Mostro for Azul to finish with some contracts. Not wanting to bother him, you waited in the main dining area, lone in a booth. Only lone for a while, though, as the aforementioned Leech twins came strolling up with knowing smirks.

"So..." Floyd started, "Miss Ashengrotto, huh?" He sat right next to you, "You apparently had a whole spectacle last night. Very romantic."

"Just make sure you both don't forget us as newlyweds." Jade engaged in the teasing too, but didn't sit nearly as close. "We'd be very lonely. Right, Floyd?"

"Yup. Anyway. Baby names."

"Huh?!"

"Floyd Junior has a nice ring to it."

"Or Jade Junior."

"What are you three talking about?"

"........"

"We should leave. Come on, Floyd." Jade stood up, taking Floyd by the arm and dragging him out of the booth.

"Yeah. Have fun, lovebirds."

"So..." You smiled sheepishly, "How is my fantastic husband doing?" You said, just loud enough for anyone in the immediate vicinity to whip their heads around and gawk.

"Please." Azul chuckled, "I'm good. How is my beautiful wife?"

"Ready to give you a baby." You whispered.

"Slow down!"

on one of the rare times idia actually went out of his room, it was for this limited deluxe edition of a game he had been waiting for for months.

problem was, it was an in-store only promo. if he wanted the game, he'd have to endure the stress of other people.

if only to make the trip a little less painful on his cortisol receptors, he decided to invite you to join him.

the store was packed. like the only reason the two of you got in was because you had waited there for at least five hours before it opened.

even then, it took another hour or two to actually get to the checkout with two copies of the game in hand.

it was at the checkout that the incident happened.

after being out and waiting for almost half your day, you had obviously gotten bored.

and what better cure for your boredom than to play a silly little prank on your unsuspecting boyfriend?

"You two excited for the release?" The clerk asked. He looked obviously exhausted, but kept a weary smile and his tone light. "I hear this ones better than the prequel. Bugs and cheeses have all been patched."

You nodded enthusiastically, deciding that now was the time to enact your totally thought-out plan, "Yup! My husband and I are going to have a little gaming date. Right, Id-" You turned to your boyfriend, stopping your sentence midway through. He looked like his entire brain shut off, hair lit up a bright pink and his face dusted with a blush to rival even the reddest tone. If he was a cartoon, he'd have steam coming out of his ears and the top of his skull would come up like a geyser.

"I- Um- My-" He couldn't even utter a single sentence. "My wife-" He gestured to you. Eventually, he gave up on even trying to articulate himself, slammed the required thaumark bills on the counter, and made his way out of there as quickly as he could. Unceremoniously, he shoved you (with surprising gentleness considering how clumsy he was being) into the passenger seat of his rarely used car, and quickly turned to book it into the drivers seat.

The two of you sat there in silence for a minute or two. His expression was unreadable, and you couldn't tell if it was upset, excitement, or anxiety.

He finally broke the silence with a mumble. ".... -married?"

"I couldn't hear you, hun. What'd you say?"

"I said.... -get married?"

"My love. Please speak up."

"I SAID, DO YOU REALLY WANT TO GET MARRIED?!"

"......."

"........"

"What...?"

"You know. Because I'm not very marriage material...?" His statement was more of a question, and he turned away from you in shame, "I mean, there are all of those princes at NRC. SS+ level otome MMC's."

"Idia."

"I was just thinking you'd rather them."

"Idia."

"I mean, there's, like, a million of them." He fiddled with the bottom hem of his hoodie in embarrassment. God, if he could just hide in a hole forever-

"IDIA!" You snapped, taking him by the shoulders and forcing him to look at you, "I don't want them. I want you." Putting on your best comforting smile, you leaned over the gearbox to press a chaste kiss to his cheek. "I woke up at five A.M. for this. If that doesn't make it clear that I'd want you and only you, then maybe me saying it to your face will."

If it was even possible his hair got even wilder and even pinker. It was a miracle it didn't set everything in the car on fire. "A-Are you sure...?" He half-whispered, half-squeaked.

You nodded, placing a hand on his cheek. Your other hand rested on the gearbox so you could lean closer to him. "Dead serious."

Idia's cheeks lit up pink, and all of the blue that had been slowly returning to his firey hair vanished, being replaced by the previous pink once more. "L-Let's just get back to NRC..." He managed to mumble out.

Malleus wasn't the most expressive person. When a simple upset could smite an entire family, the benefits of feeling anger or ecstasy paled in comparison to the concequences.

That wasn't to say he didn't have his moments, though.

Your plan was simple; when Malleus least expected it, you'd call him by the sweet nickname, and watch his head explode. Or, at least, show some more feeling than slightly pleased or slightly upset.

The two of you were walking the halls of NRC almost ritualistically. It had become a routine for Malleus to meet you outside of your classes and escort you to your next one. He was so dedicated that not even most urgencies could prevent him from seeing you. You had asked him a few weeks prior on why he was so devoted, but he only responded with a cryptic 'it's my duty'.

Arriving at your classroom, you leaned up and pressed a quick peck to his cheek. "Thank you, husband." You whispered. You expected him to react in a giddy manner, but quite the contrary, he only reciprocated your smile and leaned down to kiss your forehead.

"You're welcome, my wife." He smiled just a little more than he usually did. "I must get to my own class. I'll see you afterwards." And with that, he waved off a confused you.

He didn't even seem to be bothered by the nickname. What's more, is that he called you his wife! Last you checked, you weren't married! Was he just playing along? Or was he trying to retort your prank in his own way? You were supposed to be pranking him!

-----------

Your mind raced with possibilities for the entire time you were in class. It got so bad that Trein had to reprimand you in front of all of your peers. But, in your defense, how were you supposed to focus?! The only solace you got was the dismissal bell, knowing you'd be able to see your fae lover once more.

When you exited the class, Malleus was waiting in front of the door as per usual. He unconsciously and unintentionally was splitting the student body in half like a stone in a river. They avoided him as best they could, knowing full well he was here for you.

"My beloved." He strode his way up to you, the black current of people moving in reaction, "Was your class satisfactory?" He took your hand in his. The two of you had a little extra time now in your schedules due to your paired spare periods (courtesy of the oh-so generous Headmage Crowley. He was definitely not intimidated by a certain dragon fae into it. No sir, no ma'am).

"Mhm." You peered into his eyes thoughtfully, trying to read just what exactly had happened earlier. If it had been a prank on his part, surely there'd be some evidence of amusement, right? You stared like this all the way into the courtyard, where he finally noticed with a furrowed brow and slight pout.

"Something is troubling you."

Oops. You were caught, "It's nothing. Really." You tried to soothe his worries, but your attempts were in vain and only made him worry more.

"You're lying to me." He stopped in his tracks, causing you to turn to face him. He crossed his arms in an almost childlike fashion, "You shouldn't be trying to suffer alone. As your husband I have a duty to help you, do I not?"

With his final sentence, you couldn't help but sigh. You obviously wouldn't get answers from him by just staring. He was as straight faced as a stone cold killer.

"....Can I ask you a question...?" You requested hesitantly. Maybe it was just nothing. If the two of you were just in an unspoken prank war, it might be best to not bring it up.

"Yes." He answered instantaneously, almost before you got your question out. "Anything."

"Are you calling me your wife as a joke?" You blurted out the entire question at once. Luckily, the courtyard was mostly empty to protect you from your blunder, but it was nonetheless embarrassing, "I mean, I was doing it as a silly little prank. Then you did it too. You sounded so serious when you said it, too." You averted your gaze, wanting to look anywhere but at your lover. In your peripheral vision you saw him grow more confused than worried now. Rather than his brow being furrowed in concern, it was furrowed in thought.

It took a moment for him to speak. He tilted his head, as if it would help in deciphering the code you just tossed in his face, "We are betrothed, are we not? We haven't had a wedding yet, so we aren't in technical terms husband and wife. But, you have begun to call me your husband. In turn, I assumed you wanted me to refer to you as my wife."

You froze. He thought you were what? As far as you could remember, he didn't give you any indicator as to being engaged up until now!

"Hold on." You were so confused and shocked that your embarrassment ebbed away quickly. You looked him up and down. Were cameras going to pop out from behind a bench? A tree, perhaps? "I wasn't told anything about being engaged. When did this happen?"

His tone only grew more confused now, "A few weeks prior. You were accepting my courtship advances. The necklace you received was one of betrothal." He stated simply, "It was one from my personal collection, and you accepted it. Is that not a common proposal where you're from?"

"NO?! Malleus, where I'm from, people propose with a ring and ask if they will marry them!"

".....I see. This is quite the conundrum." He placed a hand on his chin, "Am I to cancel the wedding plans, then?" He looked almost sad at the prospect. You could tell immediately that this was something he had been planning since that night he gifted you that silver necklace.

You sighed again, this time bigger and heavier, "....I mean..." You didn't want to let him down, but it all felt too fast! "Maybe don't cancel them persay..." His mood drastically improved at your words. Optimism was a powerful tool, and he was using it right to his advantage.

"Maybe we can do things from my culture now?" You continued, "Once you propose in the human way, then we can start planning our wedding together." You thought this was a fair compromise. He already proposed with fae customs, but you weren't exactly ready to rush into a wedding dress. If things could be held off for at least a few more months, you'd have time to adequately settle into the reality.

Your words didn't come close to deterring Malleus. He nodded with more enthusiasm than ever. "I shall dedicate myself to the education and study of human ways. I will plan out a human proposal posthaste." He looked at you with a fire in his eyes. One you hadn't seen too often, but enough to recognize, you knew what it meant. He only got this look when he was so hellbent on succeeding that it'd take all of Twisted Wonderland to prevent him from reaching his goals.

You'd let out a monster, and you knew it. All you could do now was pray for your survival.

------------------------

A few days later, you were chatting casually with your regular quartet of Ace, Deuce, Grim in the cafeteria. But, your comfortable conversation was abruptly interrupted by a scream.

"HUMAN!!!!!!" You jumped at the sound, immediately recognizing it to be only one person.

"Sebek? Is something the matter?"

"MY LORD HAS DECIDED TO PROPOSE TO YOU ONCE MORE!!!!" He exclaimed, his volume far too high even in the large room. "YOU MUST LOOK THE PART WHEN HE APPROACHES YOU!" Without a second beat, he started dusting you off, nitpicking your appearance down to the lint on your shoulder.

Being friend with Sebek long enough had let you into his mind. You knew he was happy for you, and just expressing it in his own unique way. He had long since come to terms with your relationship, and had even come to support it (again, in his own way).

"Hold on..."

"No way..."

"Huh?!"

All three of your friends in front of you had gaping mouths, utterly shocked. They all yelled at the same time, their tones fearful and confused.

"My henchman..."

"You, of all people..."

"Prefect is...."

"GETTING MARRIED?!"

Oh lord. This'll be fun to explain.

[natalicss]

Glitter & Crimson

kwon ji-yong x american pop star!reader

summary: you and ji-yong live busy lives. as both of you start preparing for new albums and tours, as well as manage long distance during the holiday of love, the pressure of it all seems to get to you. set in the same universe as like we were in paris

warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff, reader is working herself too hard, mentions of not eating, not proofread, implied age gap (reader is mid twenties), reader crashes out a lil bit, if i missed any lemme know and ill add it (i still don’t know how to use tumblr)

word count: 4.2K

nat’s notes: hey y’all!! in honor of valentine’s day i wanted to write SOMETHING, and this is what came out. i don’t actually know how romantic this is but…it’s more of american pop star & jiyong sooo im not gonna complain. i also didn’t tag anyone cause…for some reason that scares me so whoops. OH the little divider thing below is by strangergraphics btw

Valentine’s day, a cliche holiday that people often either love or despise. You usually felt pessimistic, for years. For years, you spent the holiday with your friends, going out and drinking nights away, dancing in clubs and wearing flattering outfits. If you weren’t doing that, you were curled up at home surrounded by your favorite snacks as you binged watched your favorite show. You didn’t like Valentine’s day, but you took the day to take care of yourself.

And then you met Ji-yong.

It was almost embarrassing, how easily that man swept you off your feet. A whimsical fairytale of unexpected friends to lovers. He made every day an adventure, one way or another. Never a second did you doubt your love for him. Not even when the two of you went months without seeing each other, swept up in busy schedules. Not even when the two of you kept your relationship a secret from fans and the industry for years. That didn’t go well, considering you two leaked it yourselves by locking lips at a Chanel fashion show…oops.

You grew to love Valentine’s day, the both of you using it as an excuse to share how much you adored and cared about each other even more than you already did. Flowers, chocolates, romantic dates, you two had done it all at this point. So, you couldn’t help but feel a little ache in your heart as you walked into your LA dance studio, getting ready for tour rehearsals. 

While Ji-yong was busy himself with rehearsals, preparing for his new album, his new show, and everything else that comes with G-Dragon’s comeback, you were worrying about your own. Your fifth album was released a couple months ago, and the pending start of your tour was coming quicker than you anticipated. After the fashion show, and a few remaining days with your boyfriend, you had no choice but to return back to America and continue getting ready. You two barely had time to bask in the reality that everybody knew about your relationship, now separated by the ocean.

Your days were filled with chaos. From the Grammys, to meeting with stylists and trying different pieces, to rehearsals for choreography, to overlooking the stage setup and the designs, to picking out your microphones, meeting with various crew members, you barely had a moment to breathe. With the time difference adding on to that, you and Ji-yong found keeping in contact a bit harder than usual. For years, it didn’t matter. If one of you was busy, the other wasn’t, and the two of you could compromise schedules, take phone calls at random times, and find more free time to travel back and forth. But this? This was different. 

You were standing in a large studio with your backup dancers and your choreographer, all of you covered in sweat, your body's aching, and your hearts pounding against your chests. Valentine’s day was this week, and you tried hard not to focus on it. It was your first Valentine’s day that you wouldn’t be with your boyfriend. And while in reality, that wasn’t that big of a deal, it hurt knowing that you weren’t even certain when you’d see him next.

Trying not to dwell on it, you focused on your work. Pushing yourself farther than usual. You moved with precision and acted as if the studio was your stage. Your choreographer, who you’d been working with for years, watched you intently as you and your dancers swung your hips to the beat. You held a microphone to your lips, singing along to your latest single. You strut, looking at the mirror and the would-be crowd. You felt every movement. It burned. It ached. It stung. Your lungs felt like they were going to collapse. You hadn’t worked this hard, this long, since your first world tour. Back then, you felt like you had something to prove. New to the industry, blowing up alongside some of the best artists. You wanted to show that you were meant to be there. 

In a way, you felt like that now. Five albums later, your fourth world tour, and you felt that need to prove that you still were that American pop-princess they crowned you to be. Maybe it was the press finally getting to you. Comments on how your last tour wasn’t as extravagant, how you haven’t been in the media as much the last few years, resulting in a potential downfall in your career. Maybe it was the need to please the fans, knowing they’ve been waiting for almost two years for this tour. Knowing they were going to want it to be good, better than before. Maybe it was your team, who constantly had their own thoughts and opinions on what your setlist should be, what outfits you should wear, where your tour dates should be. It was normal, expected when you’ve been in the industry. Knowing that still didn’t diminish the weight on your shoulders as you moved your legs with an articulate move.

One of your dancers, Raphael, was trying to hide the concern on his face as the two of you continued your dance for another song. He had been one of your dancers since your second tour, and a good friend along the way. He knew you better than most people here, other than maybe your best friend who was quietly watching from the sidelines. He’d seen you working hard like this for weeks. Even before you left for Paris, he had started to get worried as he watched you push and push and push. You could take a lot, you were strong and ambitious, things he admired. But everybody had a limit. 

He thought you would have gotten some rest after your performance in Paris, taking a few days off to spend with Ji-yong before coming back to LA. That had given him some temporary relief. But when you got back, his concern was back more than ever. He noticed how little you did anything else. You were hardly eating, coming into your work days with circles under your eyes, you had started to become more agitated when anyone made mistakes, especially yourself. You barely took breaks. When the other dancers were sitting down, drinking water, eating their lunches, you were still on the floor, practicing harder moves and trying to perfect them.

Raphael was staring at you now, watching as your body faced him, your head still angled towards the mirror as you sang. Your hand pressed into his chest, pushing him slightly as the two of you moved in sync. He walked backwards, watching you closely. Your eyes were glossed over with exhaustion, red from lack of sleep, and your skin was sticky with sweat. His eyes danced over you, watching the way your hand shook holding the microphone. The way your legs started to move with less precision. You missed a note. Other dancers noticed, keeping up with their own routine but sending looks at Raphael and each other. 

You slowly blinked as you moved with them, seemingly out of it. As you spun, everything around you seemed to, too. Your vision blurred, the room rotating in odd angles as you started to stumble in your steps. Part of you knew something was wrong, but another part of you refused to accept it, pushing. You kept the microphone up by your lips, continuing to sing despite the way your lungs were burning for more oxygen. Your choreographer stood up straight, her eyebrows furrowing. You pulled the microphone away to continue a dance break, but as you started the first difficult move, the room began to spin in a nauseating way. 

Your brain couldn't catch up as you started to fall forward. Raphael wrapped an arm around you, yelling your name in panic as the two of you collided with the floor. The choreographer quickly stopped the music, everyone in the room starting to crowd around you. Your friend came over, bottled water in hand, and their phone as they looked you over. In a few moments, your eyes fluttered open, and in the one moment your body stopped overworking you could feel the way every part of you was hurting. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” Your choreographer asked, looking you over. “Give them some room,” Dancers started to step back, their eyes never leaving you. You groaned, sitting up slowly as Raphael kept a hand on your shoulder. “What the hell happened?”

“I’m fine,” You answered shortly, reaching for the water in your friends hand. “I just haven’t drank enough water today. I’m good.”

Raphael and your friend shared knowing looks. “Y/N, maybe you should take a minute. You just passed out, again-” “I’m fine!” The two of them watched as you pushed off the floor harshly. You still swayed in your steps, but you remained upwards. You started chugging the water, crushing the plastic before throwing it towards the trashcan. You shook your limbs, as if that would erase the exhaustion. “Again!” 

Raphael clenched his jaw, knowing that you couldn’t go on like this. If you did, tour wasn’t going to last more than a couple shows. You had passed out at a practice a couple weeks ago, too. When you and your crew were getting ready for the Gala Des Pièces Jaunes event, you had over-exerted yourself and collapsed. That time, Raphael hadn’t been able to catch you, and you had landed harshly on the floor. And though he had been there to catch you this time, you might not be so lucky if you were on stage. He looked in the direction of your friend, who was back on the side lines. They were thinking the same thing.

But you weren’t listening. At every concerned comment your friend made, you brushed it off with a dismissive huff, and any time Raphael suggested to you to rest, or eat, or take a day off, you shot back with a snarky remark. You were too busy to take a break. You had too much counting on this tour. You had to be perfect.

So, they had to reach out to the one person you would listen to.

Ji-yong was entirely unaware of exactly how much work you were putting yourself through. He knew you were busy, as he was doing many of the same things you were. And sure, he noticed some tension in your voice when he asked you about your days, but he thought it was just anxiety. You’d always been so nervous when big projects were coming up. It was what made your shows so amazing, the way you cared about your work, your fans. The message was clear in every lyric, every dance, and more. 

So, when he got a phone call mid-afternoon from Raphael, he was a little confused. The two of them were friends, of course, but they hardly talked one-on one. Still, he answered it, bringing his phone to his ear as he excused himself from the room filled with management. “Hello?”

“Hi, sorry to bother you man,” Raphael says. In his voice, Ji-yong can here something that he couldn’t exactly place. Like something was lurking behind his tone.

“No, it’s fine,” Ji-yong says kindly. “Is everything okay?”

There’s a lingering silence, some shuffling on the other end. Raphael sighs as he takes a moment to find the right words. “No, uh, not really. It’s Y/N.”

Ji-yong tenses, his thumb playing with the rings on his fingers. “What’s going on?” He asks warily.

“Has she told you about the tour?”

“Parts.” Ji-yong says, trying hard to keep his tone light and unnerved. “She’s been busy, so we haven’t talked about it in detail.”

Raphael scoffs slightly, “She’s been busy, alright.” Ji-yong hears Raphael shuffle more, “We’re worried about her, man. She’s been working herself to the bone.”

Ji-yong blinks. “Is she stressed?” He thinks about all the things the two of you did to cope with anxiety. Whether it was breathing exercises, meditation, listening to music, he thinks about mentioning it to him-

“She’s more than that. She’s barely sleeping, eating, she passed out at practice again–”

“What do you mean again?”

Raphael exhales loudly, “She didn’t tell you about that either?” He is chuckling lowly. Ji-yong is looking at the floor, his mind all over the place. “For that gala, she was working so much, she fainted at practice a couple days before the show.”

Ji-yong is pacing, unable to stop himself. How had you not told him? How had he not noticed? He always asked you if you ate that day, he always texted you little reminders to eat breakfast, drink water. You had always done the same for him, too, knowing his own struggles with his mental health and working himself too hard. A guilty ache in his gut made him suddenly feel uncomfortable in his skin.

“She’s not listening to anybody. We’ve all tried telling her to take a break, to eat, to take a fucking nap. She just gets mad.” Raphael’s words make Ji-yong wince, painfully understanding what that was like. “Which is why I called you.”

Ji-yong is looking around the building he’s in, looking out the window. Seoul moved around him like it always had. His team was in a room just a few feet away, working away at his album, his tour, his press tours. And yet, all of that felt silly now as he thought about you. His partner who he truly cared about more than himself. He clenched his jaw, scratching at his hair as he tries to think clearly. He could call you, scold you for your carelessness for yourself and try to knock some sense into you. But he knew you better than that, just like you did. You knew how upset he’d be at you for working too hard, so you hadn’t mentioned it, leaving out key points in conversation. And he knew you wouldn’t listen, not to a phone call. 

So, desperate times call for desperate measures.

As the week of Valentines continued, so did you. You continued working hard, refusing to acknowledge worried comments from your co-workers. Even your manager had tried to say something, only to get snapped at (which didn’t happen often). If your choreographer conveniently got sick, like today, that didn’t stop you from going to the studio and continuing practice alone. 

The music blared from the speakers, but your own heavy breathing and the squeaking of tennis shoes was louder in your ears. You chose not to sing today, the only leniency you’d give your body. Instead, you focused on the set, practicing a new song that was going to be released with the deluxe version of your album. You moved your arms with the music, tilting your body in various directions, imagining your dancers were there to help create the perfect image. You swing your body in a sensual motion, sinking lower to the ground. Your body was screaming at you, almost begging you to stop as you stood back up. You glared at your own reflection. You could see it. The exhaustion. The stress. You could feel the pressure scratching into your muscles like claws.

Tears pricked your eyes as you stared at yourself. You had lost weight, probably from the lack of meals and the extreme amounts of exercise. Your eyes red with bags under them. You looked almost sick, from how tired you were. You could feel it. And yet you didn’t let your body stop. As a particularly intense part came up, tears streamed down your pale cheeks as you pushed. Every move was hit exactly as it should be. Extreme, fast, smooth, and a hint of flirtation as you beamed at the mirror like your fans were watching from the other side. You ignored the way your throat burned at the sobs threatening to escape you. You ignored the way your arms were aching every time you moved. You ignored how your feet suddenly felt to heavy to move.

Until you hit the floor.

Your legs had given out on you, letting you land in a heap of limbs. You scrunch your face up in pain, tears falling more rapidly. You pushed yourself up slowly, staring down at the floor like it had pulled you down. It wasn’t good enough. You weren’t good enough. This tour was going to fall apart, and it’d be entirely your fault. Your fans would be disappointed, your dancers and your crew would lose their jobs, your team would be mad at you, and you would have to face it all alone-

You let out a scream of frustration, slamming your hands against the floor repeatedly. The scream eventually contorted into a strangled sob. Your body shook, no longer having the energy to get up. You leaned back down, your forehead resting against the floor a you heaved. All of the stress, the overbearing pressure, the weeks of working hours and hours a day. It all washes over you like a bone crushing tsunami. 

You didn’t notice the door opening, something dropping to the floor, and running footsteps until someone grabs you.

Initially, you flinch at the touch. Expecting it to be Raphael or your friend, you shoot up from the floor, trying to scoot away from them. But instead, you’re facing a wide-eyed mint-haired Ji-yong. Your boyfriend. Who was, last you checked, supposed to be in Seoul, not LA. 

You blink. Were you hallucinating? For a moment, he just stared at you. He’d never seen you like this. Stressed? Tired? Absolutely. But this was different. Oddly reminiscent of his own past. The thought shook him to his core. His expression softened as he reached for you, his hand falling on your shoulder. You looked back at him, his touch bringing you back to reality. This was real, he was in front of you, and he’d just walked into your studio to see you in a pile of tears. 

“What are you doing here?” You ask, your voice hoarse. You look him over, he looked in much better condition than you. Except for the worry in his eyes that made you shrink back into your guilt.

“Your friends called me.” Ji-yong explains, reaching up and pushing your hair out of your face. You felt warm to the touch, too warm. “They’re worried about you, and so am I,” You looked away from him. You didn’t want to face the guilt, the anxiety, the feelings bubbling up in you the last few weeks. “Talk to me,”

You could only shrug, meek. You looked around the studio. “It’s not going to work.” You whisper. He frowns. “The tour. It’s going to fail. I’m going to mess up, or it’s not going to be good enough, and everyone is going to hate it, and I can’t risk that. I can’t mess this up-”

“Jagiya,” Ji-yong’s voice cuts through the air with an unexpected warmth. You look at him. “All of this will be perfect, but none of this is worth basically killing yourself for.” He slides closer to you, “You can’t give it your all if you’re like this. You of all people know that.” He was right. His clear calm words sinking into you. “You’re not going to mess this up. You’re not going to disappoint anyone. You’re not going to fail.” You feel tears roll down your face, and then you feel his touch. As he wipes them away, you lean into his palm for comfort. 

“I missed you,” You whimper.

“I missed you, beautiful,” He whispered back. Slowly, you came forward. You let his arms wrap around you as you curled into his chest, letting out a slow sigh as you finally let your body relax. He ran his fingers through your hair, holding you close. He rested his chin on top of your head, sitting in silence for a moment. His heart hurt with you, for you. You had always been your own biggest critic, he shared a similar testament for himself. But seeing you like this, something so unlike you, made his chest ache. “For the rest of the week, you’re relaxing.”

You sit up again, wide, fearful eyes looking at his calm ones. “I can’t! We have dress rehearsal-”

“You’re not arguing with me on this. Your choreographer already agreed.” His tone was slightly more stern, remaining soft whilst still showing how serious he was. You pressed your lips into a line. “I’m here all week, and you and I are both going to rest.” 

“But you have so much to do. The album-”

“Can wait a few days. I promise.” He lifts your hand, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. “Let’s get home. I’ll run you a bath and we can watch your favorite show.”

You stare at him, pondering the offer. But he can see as your expression softens, the dark cloud looming over your features fading away. “Can we make hot cocoa?” You ask quietly. 

He can only smile. “Of course.” He tells you. You crack a smile, then. He slowly starts to stand up, pulling you with him. As he turns to grab your bags, you tug at his wrist. He spins back to face you, gasping as you kiss him harshly. His hands find their home on your waist, pulling you into him. It had been a few weeks since the two of you saw each other, and neither of you expected your reunion to go like this. You poured out every feeling into the kiss, letting him know just how much you missed him, how much you loved him, how truly excited you were to see him underneath your layers of exhaustion. 

He never let go of your hand, managing to carry both your dance bag and the bag he’d haphazardly packed before basically running to the airport in one hand. The two of you looked at each other, the conversation slowly flowing into non-work related things. It was like he could see the weight lifting off your shoulders. His presence alone bringing some sort of peace to you. He knew you needed this, and in a way he needed it too.

And when Valentine’s day finally rolled around, he’d made sure to pull out the stops. You’d woken up to breakfast in bed, a ribbon-wrapped box with an expensive necklace, flowers, flowers, and more flowers. You’d done what you could for him, too. Getting him some new rings and scarves, a sentimental handwritten note filled with words of adoration and love. For part of the day, the two of you stayed in your tangled sheets. Fingers tracing bare skin and soft kisses. Whispers of love and arms wrapped around bodies. 

When the evening came, Ji-yong had told you to dress nice. The two of you ended up at your favorite restaurant, the first nice place you took him to when he came to visit you for the first time. Of course he’d been in LA plenty of times before, but the time with you was different. It was more special than all the rest. And now, he remembered that fondly as he watches you sit at the same table (merely a coincidence, or fate he thinks), your eyes finally filled with that familiar love and light. You looked at him, smiling wide. He could die happy knowing he was ever the cause of that smile. 

“I love you, you know.” You said casually, admiring him. He blinks, his cheeks flushing a soft pink that was still noticeable in the warm light. You tilted your head, smiling even more. This is it, you think. This is what you wanted life to be like. You and Ji-yong. You realize that everything else could disappear, fall apart, slip from your grasp, but as long as you had him you’d be okay. This wasn’t the first time marriage crossed your mind, but it was the first time you ever imagined your wedding and confidently believed it would eventually become reality. The idea of walking down the aisle to your Ji-yong. Picturing him looking at you dressed in white. Spending the rest of your life with him. It all seemed like a dream, but it felt like it was all exactly what you wanted.

Ji-yong reaches for your hand over the table. He’s sure he’d never let you go if he had the choice. He looks at you, watching the way you’re glowing even in the dim lights. The way you looked at him enough to make him melt. He knew that you were it for him. You were the person he wanted to come home to every night. The person he wanted to kiss every day before he walked out the door. The person he would hold when he was upset. The person he’d bicker with until you were grey and old. The person he’d have a family with. It wasn’t a question, and there wasn’t another possibility to him. It was all a matter of time. Whether it was tomorrow, next week, next year, whenever. He didn’t know where his life was taking him, but he knew it was all going to be with you.

“I love you, too.”

[proxycrit]

I love your au!!! I love how the hylian duo look like gremlins, I LOVE the expressions and sass constantly and the changes to the lore, the worldbuilding and also the emotions (OUCH). I love their relationship with purah and each other and the new champions. I love the depth you gave Yona and her relationship with Sidon and Mipha. I love how link feels comfortable talking to sidon in addition to sign, I don't know if he does that with anyone else but Zelda unless its absolutely necessary (eg: just launched out a cannon and is paragliding down, so hands are busy) (side note: i love how much of an adrenalin junky/gremlin he is!!)

I do got a few questions! Will the pair get the sheikah slate again (so say link has the slate and zelda the pad), and can both slates do the warping and item storage (food, ingredients, armor, weapons, etc) (if so: no WONDER link was so upset! His collection!)

Does link have access to the ultrahand abilities (ik you said not The ultrahand, but what about fuse or ascend or rewind etc?) Where is the mastersword??

Does Link still have the champions' abilities, or did he lose those when their spirits moved on at the end of botw?

I know these are a lot of questions but I can't stop thinking about it!! The last few updates sent me back rereading the whole au and now its just vibrating in my head and giving me no piece

This is long and rambly, just know I am very much enjoying this au! Its silly and fun and touching and cute. Thank you for working on it!!

Oo some notes (also ty for circling my au haha im glad other people fixate like i do)

(Prewarning— i did not finish totk despite putting triple hours in it, so a lot of this story is being written while playing, though i know the big broad strokes thanks to cultural osmosis and video essays. A lot of Familiar Familiar builds from my playthrough with BOTW over TOTK, so the sheikah influence is significantly stronger and I will always choose botw characterization over totk characterization as a result.)

That aside

1. Sheikah slate’s dead. Rest in pieces, link’s rare collectable korok poop. Purah’s extracting as much data as she can to put on the purah pad but you can see the dread in her eyes whenever she has to tell link resurrection is not possible.

2. No idea about the zonai arm powers yet— im thinking about ascend, but the longer i go through this story the less likely ill hand it to him just due to immersion breakage. He and zelda will be getting sheikah gadgets from purah though! Maybe ill have a scene of him wandering through the sky island shrines, but without zelda warning rauru he and sonia wouldnt have prepared anything for the hero of the future. (But i DO love ascension and fuse. Lowkey dislike the building mechanics from a concept art pov because the green glue makes me want to cry, but it’s FINE i GUESS)

2b. Master sword’s chilling in korok forest. Link put it back in this au because of Reasons (part of his and zelda’s characterization in this au is to discard their past roles and embrace the present, not as knight and princess but as hero and researcher. They both have to face the reality those roles aren’t dead, but it’s a work in progress. I may also never address it. This “one off hehe lemme draw some guys” idea quickly spiraled into a web comic series so apologies for the vagueness, because i too am watching them adventure with dread and awe and i don’t know where they’ll go with it. They literally write themselves.

3. Rip champions, their ghosts are Gone (but their influence remains. You go mipha, keep haunting the narrative girl, i love you)

I know that some of these story notes don’t quite match up to what totk states is stone cold canon, but that’s the joy of fan work! Anyways sorry for folks who i have NOT answered asks of— i have a lot of them and I’m much better at the drawing and writing part then the socialization aspect (please feel free to peak in to my zoo enclosure ever so often though. I need the enrichment)

[former-incel]

I keep falling back into the blackpill because of one truth I'll never be anyone's first. Not their first love first sexual experience or even first priority. Modern dating is just beta providers cleaning up after womens Chad adventures. Even if I got a girlfriend now Id be miserable knowing Im not her first. I missed all the young love milestones simply because of my face and bank account. Now every woman I see makes me wonder about her body count and when she lost her virginity. This disgusting cycle keeps pulling me back

It's understandable to feel like you missed out on youth milestones. And when that happens, you often don't even know specifically what you missed out on. But is there any specific reason why you want to be someone's first? Is being someone's first something that would actually be beneficial to you, or were you just taught by society that it's what you're supposed to want? If you're hoping to commit to someone, what matters is that you're their last, not their first. If you're not hoping to commit, then it really doesn't matter what number you are. You could also be worried about STDs, but that really only matters if someone has an astronomically large number of sexual partners, not if they've simply had a few, and you could always both get tested.

The world is filled with damaged adults who missed out on youth milestones. Maybe they had no social skills and couldn't form connections with people. Maybe they were suicidal or otherwise suffering from mental illness and had to focus on survival instead of typical experiences. Maybe they were an asshole because of maladaptive coping strategies to trauma and no one wanted to be around them. Maybe they got bad grades in school and were always grounded. Maybe their parents were strict and wouldn't allow them to go to most social gatherings. Maybe they're LGBT and were closeted during their youth. Maybe they were poor and couldn't afford to attend social gatherings or they were always working. Maybe they were sexually assaulted and too traumatized to attend events where it could happen again. Try hanging out with people like them and paying attention to what milestones they consider important.

[cyber333angel]

a few people wanted the drabble of sitting on jjs face so here it is!

your boyfriend had been away on a pogue adventure all day leaving you alone in your shared apartment. needy for him but not having him here to help you release, you tried everything from your small hands (which couldn’t do the job, not like jj’s calloused and rough hands which gets you in all the right spots) to the little pink bullet vibrator jj keeps in a drawer when he plays with you(only climaxing when he has his dick buried deep inside of you holding the vibrator to your clit). none of it was doing what you really needed it to do like your jj so you text him. moving your panties to the side and taking a selfie of your painfully wet cunt you text him, “want you home jayj..” with an attachment.

jj’s phone pings in his back pocket, taking it out he sees a message from you“hooooly fuck..woah..uh guys there’s like a family emergency back home like—a car crash a terrible terrible crash so imma dip and we can “reconcile” this like tomorrow, yeah?” the pogues look at him with a disgusted face, and john b speaks up, “ew dude, we know it’s your girlfriend. you better come back tomorrow we have a lea—oh whatever.” he stops talking, seeing jj put on his helmet and get on his bike, starting the gear. about 10 minutes later jj bust through the door to see you in silk but slightly sheer pink, nightgown.

he basically pounces on you right then and there. grabbing your head and kissing you deeply, exchanging saliva from the both of your tongues. jj pulls back “babycakes you can’t send me something like that and..wear something like this. it’s bad for my heart im telling ya.” you giggle at his deprivation, taking your hands and lifting your skirt up you show him your exposed cunt. “s’achey down there jayj.. need you to make me cum!” wet slick dripping down your thigh, jj almost throttles “oh jesus..you drive me fucking crazy.” he grabs you from the waist, hoisting you up on his shoulder and runs into your shared bedroom. making out with you he lays his head down on the pillow, grabbing you to straddle his chest. “get on top sweet girl, if y’re so needy you can ride my face.” you whimper at the suggestion and shake your head frantically. “jayj I cant do that! what if I suffocate you!” he rolls his eyes “baby the best way to die would honestly be in between-“ you cover his mouth with your hands preventing him from finishing the embarrassing sentence. “okay okay! ill do it.”

“atta girl.” you get closer to jj’s face, thighs hovering over him as you grip the headboard. “papa your face is gonna get messy!” he gets impatient with your excuses “that’s just fine sweet cheeks, but this not what mean-“ he grabs your thighs and pulls you down to mouth, mumbling “dis is what I meant.” you shiver at the contact, jj thrusts his tongue up into your cunt, slurping at your juices. “y’always taste so fuckin delicious baby..fuck.” he moves to your sensitive bud sucking knit gently and rolling it in his mouth “angh, jj your makin me feel s-so good, oh god!” he hooks his arm from under your thigh and starts rubbing your clit, sticking his tongue back into your pulsing hole. “go on princess, try to grind that sweet pussy on my tongue.” you grip the headboard, helping your balance to move your lower body forward and backwards in a slow pace. “mmmh it feels so good papa! oh your gonna make me cum!” you hear the squelches of your needy cunt and you clench around jj’s tongue. grinding yourself across his face to climax, your clit stroking on him. “f-fuck papa..s’good..” you mind going blank from the intense climax, you twitch and hover off jj’s face falling on his chest. jj sits up grabbing you by the shoulders to hug you, seeing the wet spot seethe through his pants. “well fuck babydoll..all your fussing made me cum too..shit.”

[itspheenixbaby]

elephant in the room 🐘

rant about the state of online shifting; "get-it-off my chest" moment

part 1. scripting trauma/ being a bad person in a dr how many people are really doing "bad things" or scripting in trauma in their dr? lets be so fucking for real here. why is it that everytime someone "morally corrupt" it gets exposed months apart and the "culprit" is some small ass account with like ten followers? its not common. and im not saying it never happens. but shiftok is always on about these people and im like...who tf are yall talking about? they find one bad apple and then decide the whole community needs to be reminded how fucked up it is to do xyz.

i mean lets be realistic, how many people are going out of their way to script something traumatic or harmful? the majority of the online community (reddit, tumblr, tiktok) always talks about shifting for their s/o, adventure, frienships, family or a better life in some way. how many people are deliberately scripting to harm themselves or others? and is the number really so much that we need thinkpiece after thinkpiece about it?

aand when others behave immorally or get traumatized in their dr they will experience it. they will see the effects of any bad things they do to others. they will feel the trauma first hand and suffer from what theyve scripted in many ways. we dont need to punish these people. their dr will do it for them.

P. S what about when you shift to a dr like the walking dead? or even mha and keep in the war arc? thats traumatic. hell, even an idol / fame dr can be traumatic and those are hella common! yet nobody bats an eye or reprimands it...odd...

part 2. racebending race doesnt exist. i saw a shiftoker (a white one too??) act like someone was crazy for saying it! the whole concept was created by europeans! white mans burden, race based social classes, and eugenics all seems natural to yall? i mean logically its not odd to anyone that modern racial concepts were made by the same group of people in the same time period...? the time period people needed excuses to kill, rape, steal from and enslave other groups... search up "who created race" and then report back to me..anyways..

name one good thing that splitting people up and assigning them identities based on their background does for us? its caused mocking of those that dont fit the mold their race gives them, harmful views of other because of their racial group(s) and low self esteem from outside perceptions of your race. oh and division among groups on top of everything. so what is the point of holding on to race? abandon it! shift to be white, asian, black, indigenous, do what you want! youre not "changing your race" until you shift to become a different species (and theyres obvi nothing wrong w that!).

and some people say "if you script your another race your downplaying the racism poc face" but not every country has the same type of racism the states has. not every country is even as racist as the states. for example if im shifting to be fully south korean born & raised, and live full time in south korea, its not likely ill experience racism. and even so you can just...script out racism? like what...some people literally hate shifters who dont script out racism and expect everyone to script it out, but then turn to say that they cant change their race because of racism...huh? genuinely dont get that.

P. S im only really preaching abandonment of race so flippantly in regard to shifting. in this reality we're kinda stuck with it at this point lol.

P.S.S and it seems shifters from the usa hate racebending the most! as an american, i wonder how much of that is being intimidated that the concept of a racial hierarchy, that our nation has been built upon for centuries, can be shattered so easily...and therefore obviously proves it as obsolete. food for thought. (half joking here teehee)

[satoruhour]

Thoughts on poly with satosugu

a/n: long post LOL enjoy

howd you manage to get two of the most caring yet annoying boyfriends ever??? they feed off each others energy sm it’s insane lol good luck. but not in a bad way of course. it def started out when one man of the two was frustrated with the stagnancy and the mixed signals between the three of you that gojo decided to confess and the both of you dated for a while.

geto didnt rlly wanna intrude and felt bad even tho you three were still eye fucking basically every time u were in a room together. gojo was the first to ask you about it “no because ive thought of it too” and gojo’s face lights up bc teecchnically hes been texting geto always how its been a dream to date you even tho it rubs in the wound a little. but it’s ok!!!! im sorry suguru!!! all three of you are together now !!!! 

to start off they are very physical and clingy. always need to have some part of their body on you. gojo prefers the arm slinging over your shoulders, geto prefers a more subtle arm around the waist. ppl r always starin when you three go out 😭 but it’s so cute lowkey! gojo is usually the upbeat one, suggesting dates and places to go and things to do, creating the gc between the three of you (if u didnt alr have one), keeping the relationship fresh with a lot of questions. geto contributes more to the practicality of the rs?? not to say he doesnt talk or is passive in the poly rs but he’s more of a getting groceries, lounging in the back watching the two of you talk excitedly bout digimon, and likes the household chores kind of guy.

it feels like if i say this it’s too cheesy but gojo feels like a sunrise: the dawn of a new day and the adventures that it may bring while geto is like sunsets: the dusk of winding down after the exciting day and youre always craving both. gojo and geto complete each other in countless other ways too and the dynamic you three have is super adorable.

ill highlight a few scenarios bc theres too much potential and power w/ poly stsg!! watching movies: geto us usually okay with anything u two pick out and gojo picks out some psychological horror for funsies but hes screaming into geto’s arms at every jumpscare 😭 the popcorn goes everywhere good lord. you and geto laugh (in the case youre not too afraid of horror) laugh at gojo and pepper him in kisses even when he puts the blame on you for choosing this movie. “too scared that youre placing the blame on our poor (y/n)?” gojo tsks and swats away geto’s hand but is soon distracted by you pulling u into your embrace lol <3 the usual movie positions are like this: either the both of you latch onto geto’s sides, or youre tucked into geto and gojo sits on the floor, your head in either man’s laps and your feet on the other, you squashed in the middle of them both, gojo tucked in your hug while you are tucked in geto’s <333

going grocery shopping: it’s stocking up time and geto cant possibly handle bringing back all the groceries by himself so he brings you along and also (reluctantly) brings gojo. main reason is bc gojo likes to put a lot of things in the cart and begs with his pretty eyes of his that geto always gives in 😭 youre like semi-focused on the task. you put together the grocery list but then youre getting distracted when you see the fruits section and point at it excitedly to geto. gojo is somewhere in the store. sometimes you lead the expedition, pushing the trolley as geto and gojo walk together a few steps behind hand in hand. it changes a whole lot.

sometimes geto will head off to get something and youre left to push the trolley, with gojo by your side kissing your temples walking by your side. they will both sometimes play pranks on you and go off without telling u and run around the store hoping you wont find them LMAO, or even be so so embarrassing dancing in the middle of the aisles or putting their face up to the cameras that broadcast the footage on big tvs ….. also once you guys lost gojo and you had to make an announcement at the counter to call for a six foot man to meet you two at the cashiers….

it’s easy to feel insecure sometimes, or rather not getting enough love / feeling left out bc sometimes they both click so well together you cant understand their inside jokes or they act like boys again, hitting and laughing to each other about shoko fumbling utahime again or something. they apologise profusely, feeling guilty that they even made u feel like that, esp gojo since he has a tendency to initiate a lot of those jokes which you dont understand, or talk about man things lol. youre the sole focus of their eyes always and they show it even more today by pampering you, having a sleepover ish date night, you paint each other’s nails and do some skin care, gossip a little. geto and gojo compliments you a lot, even more so during this bout of insecurity. they fight over who gives better compliments 😭😭😭😭

but either way you bring both of them in to kiss them as a thank you. it’s so difficult to choose between the both of them for cuddling too bc theyre so warm always. you curl into geto first bc on this night you guys picked your fav movie (which also happened to be gojo’s fav) but you were feeling tired asf so the former let you rest up on him while hte latter had his eyes glued. and later when geto needs to clean up he passes you to gojo gently and you adjust yourself against his lanky body <3333 “she’s just so cute, ain’t she?” geto smiles, brushes your hair out ur face, placing a peck on your forehead and another on gojo’s lips. “rest up first, both of you. i’ll come in soon.”

overall best boyfriends ever; let me highlight some more scenarios which i think would happen: coddling over you when you get your period. geto holding your tummy and massaging it while gojo feeds u snacks. fighting over the blanket between the three of you. gojo runs cold at night, geto runs a little cold too so youre usually the mediator between the two of them. “just buy a bigger blanket!!!” and gojos up and ready to head out at 3am. “go to sleep satoru the stores not open rn.” “theft exists.” “no!” sometimes youd go on individual dates when the other cant make it, esp when you three have busy schedules. either two will ALWAYS promise to shower the third in affection once they return home from the date! sometimes when you three need to visit weddings, you’d be squashed in the middle dancing with them, two towers and the shorter one in between that it looks a little comical.

fighting about whose music is the best in the car and fighting over the au, fighting abt who gets to drive. gojo tries to squeeze into the stick shift bc sometimes he misses you two in the back seat :(((( they let you sit down on public transport if the car isnt possible. scary dog privileges, two of them. gojo sneers at anyone who wants ur number and tells them off, geto glares quietly, gojo thinks its bc of him but actually it’s all geto’s doing LMAOAOAO. loving the kisses they both give you: gojo a little more excitable and geto’s sensual and slower, will also fight over who you should straddle when your making out but u give them both equal attention. one will take over the other whos preoccupied with your lips. geto littering kisses down your neck while youre busy with gojo’s lips and vice versa 💟💟💟

sigh id love to be in a poly rs with them and id love to write n*sfw but my hands hurt toodles (i do have a stsg ask that is smutty tho ... will write that soon muahahha)

hello hello!

[delulu-baddie]

Between Sister and Heart

Summary: You begin to question your morals after getting into a relationship with your sisters ex Caitlin.

Pairing: Caitlin Clark x Reader

Warnings: Cheating and a few curse words

A/N:  I’m getting ready to go back to school so lifes been kind of hectic, but this is going to be a multi part series. As always thank you guys so much for reading and all of the love on my past projects. Lastly, make sure to send in some requests so that I can give you guys stories that you want to read. <3

_________________________________________________

You knew it was wrong and you should've stopped this a while ago. You two are going to cause so much hurt to someone that you love, but something about Caitlin made all of your morals go out the window. 

Caitlin and your sister Audrey had been together for the past two years and while you weren’t exactly fond of her in the beginning, you grew to like her, which turned into a great friendship, and you should have stopped there but didn’t. As time went on your feelings for the girl began to grow and for a while you were able to keep them to yourself, until you werent. 

9 Months Ago

Tonight one of Caitlins teammates was planning on throwing a party to commemorate the beginning of the new school year. Your sister is a STEM major, and has always taken her academics seriously, putting school work before anything else. You on the other hand were the opposite. You had a pretty easy major, probably one of the easiest your school has to offer. You liked going out to drink with friends, and going on random adventures, even when you knew you should be at home finishing assignments. Caitlin had always liked that about you. Typically when Audrey would tend to flake on certain events whenever she had a big assignment or a test coming up which ultimately was the reason she decided to start hanging out with you more, and tonight was no different.

Caitlin had let your sister know about Kate's party weeks ago, and while she didn’t give a definite ‘yes’, it still surprised Caitlin when she got a text saying she wasn’t going to be able to go because one of Audreys professors had already scheduled a test coming up in a week. Audrey knew her girlfriend hated going places alone when she planned on drinking so she urged Caitlin to ask you to go to her place. But what she didn’t know was that her girlfriend was happy that she had told her to ask you to go in her place. 

You had just finished up an assignment for your math class and heard a notification from your phone, quickly checking it and seeing a text from Caitlin.

                                            CC <3

CC <3

hey, ik this is totally last minute but your sister bailed on 

me and i need someone to come with me to my friends

party tn. so could you be the most perfect friend ever

and come with me. I’ll buy you crumbl cookie!

Y/N                                                                    

wow… glad to know im a

scapegoat. :’(

CC <3

omg you're right that sounds so insensitive, im sorry!

you don’t have to go, im sure you already have plans

for the night, i just figured id ask.

                                        Y/N

          chill clark, you had me at crumbl

what time do i need to be ready??

CC <3

in like two hours, you can come over to mines

to get ready if you want

Y/N

okay, ill be there in like 30. im

going to shower rq

CC <3

tysm! you're an angel!!!

You quickly take a shower and start getting your stuff together running back and forth between yours and your sister's closets trying to piece together an outfit. Once you come up with an outfit you deemed appropriate for a house party you say goodbye to your sister before making your way to Catlins. 

The drive is short since she only lives about ten minutes away, but you still rush out seeing as you have a little over an hour to get your hair and makeup done. You make your way to her front door and knock before its swiftly opened by a smiling Caitlin.

“Well if it isn't the life saver herself” She says bringing you into a hug.

You giggle at the comment before responding “Life saver or scapegoat?”

“Okay you know I love you and that I hate making plans with people at the last minute. It's not personal.” she says, rolling her eyes playfully and walking back towards her room to finish getting ready.

You follow the tall girl deeper into the apartment before making your way into the bathroom next to her and laying out all of your hair tools. After about half an hour you finally finish your hair and quickly do your makeup and get dressed so you two can pregame a bit before calling the uber and heading to Kate’s. 

About an hour into the party, it's pretty safe to say the two of you were plastered, however, even with the level of drunkenness you were at, you could tell Caitlin was being a lot clingier than usual. She was constantly wanting to be near you, holding your hand, even going as far to have you sit on her lap when all of the seats got taken during a group game sesh. At first you thought that she was so drunk that she was confusing you with your sister. That was until she pulled you out onto the balcony when she wanted some fresh air. 

The two of you just sat in silence, focusing on the trees blowing in the wind and the occasional late drivers passing by. After about ten minutes you felt her place her hand on your thigh. You hated to admit that you felt butterflies in your stomach at all of the little touches of affection she was showing you tonight, but you knew it was wrong and decided to correct her on it before things got too far. 

“Caitlin, this isn’t right, and maybe i'm reading into this too much and you're just too drunk to realize that i'm not Audrey, but this can't happen” you say, sliding her hand off your thigh, breaking the silence.

“I know exactly who you are,” she says, grabbing your hand from off your lap. “You’re the girl who will drop anything to come help me out with something,even when you know you have other things you should be focusing on. The girl who comes to all of my games so that I know I have someone personal there for me because her sister who i'm with refuses to put her disliking for the sport aside to come support me. You’re the girl I'm in love with, and I can't, no I refuse to go another day without telling you.” She rants. “And don't tell me that you don't feel the same because I know you do. I feel the way your heart starts to race every time i hug you. I see how you look away every time your sister and I share some sort of affection. I need you to tell me so that I don’t feel stupid for telling you this right now” she finishes now facing you completely, staring at your eyes desperately waiting for an answer.

You were quiet for a minute, however that felt like hours for the girl standing in front of you. She had just poured her heart out confessing her love to the sister of the girl she was dating. While you sat trying to process what was just said to you, Caitlin was freaking out internally hoping that she didn’t just fuck up her chances of ever speaking to you again. You finally decide to respond to the girl, but it wasn’t what she was expecting to hear as a response. 

“I think we should leave, it’s getting late and my sister is probably waiting for me to get back home.” you say, before walking back into the house to say your goodbyes to everyone and calling an uber back to Caitlins so that you can retrieve your stuff and head back to your place. 

Caitlin stood there in shock, she couldn’t believe that that was all you had to say. She had just let her guard down to tell you how she truly felt about you, and your only concern was the time and your sister sitting at home. She soon walks back into the party to say her goodbyes as well before following you out the door to get into the uber you had ordered a few minutes ago. Her teammates had noticed the change in demeanor between the two of you from when you went outside to when you came back in, but everyone decided it was best not to bring it up at the moment. The ride back to her place was quiet. Caitlin was hoping that you would say something, occasionally looking over at you, but you didn’t. You just stayed quiet, fiddling with your fingers and staring out the window for the whole 15 minute drive.

Once you guys had finally arrived back at her place, you begin getting all of your stuff together, mentally scolding yourself for not telling your true feelings to the girl. You could tell that she was angry at you for it, and it broke your heart, but she's your sister's girlfriend and you would never want to hurt Audrey even if that meant causing hurt to yourself. You finish grabbing all of your stuff and tell Caitlin you're going to head out before she stops you. 

“Look, I know you don't want to be around me right now, but Audrey would never forgive me if I let you drive home knowing that you had been drinking. Just stay the night here and you can leave in the morning, I'll just sleep on the couch.” She says looking everywhere but at you. 

“I’m fine, I promise. I can drive back home, I don't want to intrude.” you say looking down at the floor. 

“You could never intrude, if anything your absence would annoy me more.” she says, grabbing your chin to make you look at her.

Staring into her brown eyes made your heart melt. You were so in love with her and you didn’t want to fight it anymore. Before you could think twice you grab her face, pulling her into a kiss. It caught the girl off guard, but she quickly melted into it, placing her hands onto your waist pulling you in closer. The kiss was what you had been wanting to do for the past five months.  What you didn’t know was that she had been wanting to do it since the first time she laid eyes on you. The two of you eventually pull apart just looking at one another smiling. This felt right.

“Does that mean what I think it means?” she asks with a slight smirk on her lips.

“Yes Clark, that was my way of saying I love you too” you respond rolling your eyes but failing to hide the smile creeping up on your face. “But we have to do this the right way. If you want to be with me, you have to end things with my sister, I don't want to be the other woman.” you say sternly.

She swiftly brings you into a hug and whispers “For you, i'd do anything.”

[adoreispunk]

Out of Reach (joel miller au)

summary: Olivia, a 22-year-old senior at UT Austin, is struggling to find her path. Despite her passion for photography, her father insists she pursue a more traditional career. When he suggests Olivia intern for Joel Miller, an old family friend who owns a successful contracting business. Even though Joel tries to ignore the growing attraction between them, the chemistry is clear, creating a tension they both can't avoid as they reconnect both at work and outside of it.

tags: joelmillerau, age gap, dbf!joel, joelmillerfanfic, pedropascal, mature

an: hiiii. My obsession became too strong I had to write about this man.

This is my first time writing anything like this so please be kind:) This is gonna be an AU with no outbreak and no Sarah death *yayyy*. Age gap, dbf!joel, filthy smut and fluff, and a good slow burn;)

The first 2 chapters are just to establish the story and characters relationship! The juicy stuff will start soon , trust. There's no specific descriptions for the main female character besides her name so feel free to imagine whoever you would like:)

ill also be uploading and updating on wattpad @adoreispunk

muah💋

One

"Maybe I should just run away and become a stripper" I sigh to myself.

I sat by the window of my cramped dorm room, the quiet hum of the air conditioner doing little to drown out the sound of music coming from other dorms as people get ready to go out . It was early March, and everyone else seemed to be gearing up for spring break in a few weeks. Trips, internships, adventures—plans that made it seem like they had it all figured out. For me, though,this break felt like a looming weight.

Im 22 and a senior at UT Austin. After taking a year off to seemingly figure out what the hell I wanted to do for the rest of my life, I landed on Marketing. I've always loved photography and would've started something of my own if my dad wasn't so set on me getting an actual business degree.

"You'll have a better future, Olivia. You can't get nowhere nowadays without a degree."

I could still hear him saying it in that steady, resolute tone of his. I wasn't sure if it was the words themselves that haunted me or the weight behind them—his regret. My dad grew up in a traditional household, where the values of hard work, discipline, and family were instilled in him from an early age. He was taught that education was the key to a better life, something he never had the chance to fully pursue. He always emphasized the importance of securing a steady, reliable future. That's why, when it came to me, he pushed for a path that was clear and pragmatic—a college degree, something he had always wished he could have had. To him, college wasn't just a choice; it was the opportunity he never got.

I tried to argue, once. I remember it clearly-sitting at the kitchen table, showing him my portfolio from my gap year. All the photos I'd taken of nature, friends laughing, quiet moments that captured something real. "This is what I want to do." I told him. But he just shook his head, his brow furrowed in concern, and said, "That's not a career, Liv. That's a hobby. Its beautiful but you need a degree. You need to be realistic."

And so, here I was. Senior year, taking classes I didn't care about, searching for internships I was dreading. My mind kept circling back to that word: "realistic". It wasn't that I didn't appreciate the opportunities that came with a parent who paid or pushed me to go to school, it was just that I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more I was supposed to be doing. Something that actually felt like me

I had been looking for anywhere accepting interns that I could push any limit of creativity. Every single listing I came across just felt too unrealistic or too cookie cutter. With a deep sigh, I shut my laptop, throwing it on top of any flat surface I could find on my already cluttered bedside table. The clock ticked on the wall, reminding me of how little time I had left. I wasn't even sure what I was waiting for anymore.

My dad was coming to pick me up in the morning to stay home for the weekend. He wanted to catch up on how the search was going and fill me in on some good news. I never had the nerve to tell him on the phone or over text about the search or my feelings on my stupid ass classes. As far as he knows, I'm happy and I have a plan.

The next morning, I waited for the text that my dad had arrived. I was scrambling to throw the last of my things into my overstuffed weekender bag when I heard the sound of my phone go off somewhere in my sheets. Adjusting my sweatshirt and the straps of my camera bag, which was slung over my other shoulder. I was trying to look like I had everything together, but it was clear I was in a rush—my bag was bursting at the seams. Seems metaphorical. I have the tendency to overpack.

When I stepped outside, I saw him waiting by the truck, his face breaking into a warm smile. Behind his stern persona, I like to think my dad is a softie. He helps me load my stuff into the truck and we get in. My parents separated when I was really young, and my mom hasn't been in the picture for as long as I can remember. It doesn't bother me much anymore since my dad took on both roles to the best of his ability as I was growing up. But I can't help but feel bad for my dad sometimes. He's been on his own for so long, and I think that's why he talks so much when I'm back home. When I'm around, he's always eager to fill every quiet moment with stories, questions, and advice to keep the conversation going. Which is exactly what happens the whole car ride home.

I know it's because he's lonely, and I feel for him. It's not that I mind it, it's just that sometimes I wish I could be more present for him, give him the attention he's looking for without it feeling like a never-ending monologue. I understand why he does it, though. He's been alone for so long, and I know he just wants to feel heard, to have someone around to share things with. Something I think we all yearn for.

Most of the car ride home, I zone out while my dad tells stories about work or new things he's learned online. But suddenly, my mind sharpens when I hear a name.

"...Joel Miller."

"Wait, sorry, say that again?"

"Yeah, you remember Joel Miller and his daughter Sarah? The contractor who worked with me at the company and his daughter, the curly-haired girl you spent that whole summer with?"

Holy shit, I haven't thought about Joel fucking Miller in forever.

He was my dad's old coworker, and I had a crush on him as a teenager. Nothing serious—just one of many stupid innocent crushes you get when you're growing up. Still, back then, I'd catch myself daydreaming about what it would be like if I were older and could actually have a shot with him. Joel has a daughter, Sarah, who is two years younger than me. In my freshman year of high school, we started hanging out a lot. She was sweet, and we'd gossip about school, boys, and drama. Our age gap never felt like an issue; we always seemed to get each other. Joel was also a single dad which is why I like to think dad and him were so close too. But when Joel and Sarah moved a couple of towns over during my junior year, and Joel started a new job, we saw less and less of them.

"Yeah, I remember them," I reply.

"He called me a couple weeks ago and I invited him over for a beer. We caught up quite a bit. Says when they moved, he started at a new company, but quit almost immediately. Claims the owner was a jackass. Ended up starting his own company, and it's grown a lot in the last few years. He's getting some big jobs all over the state."

I notice my body shift, leaning forward, listening intently for the first time this whole car ride. Then, I catch myself and pull back.

"Oh, wow, that's really nice to hear," I try to sound casual.

"Yeah, he was looking for a couple of new additions to the company. Asked if I'd be interested in joining him."

"Did you say yes?" I ask, almost too quickly.

"Nah, I'm too old to start over again. He understood, though. Just thought he'd extend the offer to an old friend." He pauses for a second to look over to me

"I did ask if he had any marketing positions open, though."

My head snaps to him, suddenly embarrassed. I'm not sure if I'm more uncomfortable that he's basically had to ask for a favor for me, or that the conversation I've been avoiding is about to unfold.

"Dad, what the hell!" I finally blurt. "I told you I already have everything figured out!"

"Oh yeah? Then where are you going in a couple of weeks? Tell me about it." he says, his tone teasing. If there's one thing my dad knows about me, it's that I'm terrible at lying.

I stutter, trying to recall the lie I rehearsed earlier.

"Look, I know I can be a bit of a pushover sometimes, but you know it's because I love you. And you can't graduate without some sort of internship. You're cutting it too close Liv. I'm not trying to control your decisions, but this could be a great opportunity to start a solid career with a growing business. Sure he's a bit of a hardass with a special personality but I trust 'em. "

I take a moment to think, but he gives me the space to respond. The truth is, I don't have anything lined up for spring break, I don't know what the fuck i'm doing, and I don't know if I'll find anything in time. Something about my dad backing Joel makes me feel a little safer about the whole idea. Maybe it is a good opportunity.

Before I can speak up, my dad adds, "I already told him all about you—only good things. I even showed him pictures from my Facebook and your photography. He says you've really grown up."

I whip my head toward him, horrified. My dad's Facebook is full of the most unflattering, off-guard pictures of me. I can't help but think back to my innocent crush on Joel and how mortified I'd be if he saw those photos back then.

"Why would you show him that!?" I finally managed.

He looks at me, confused. "Why would it matter?"

I don't have an answer, so I decide to change the subject instead of admitting my teenage crush on a guy almost twice my age.

"Can I at least talk to him before I commit to anything? I don't even know anything about him anymore or his company."

He grins and pats me on the shoulder. "Atta girl."

[tonyboneysblog]

HII Im the anon that requested the touya fic you can just call me the 🍊 anon if thats fine with you because ill probably be back a lot more 😭 your fics are SOO good can i request another touya fic, basically the same as last time what it was like being childhood friends with him? Ty!! 😁😁

SECRET SPOT: oneshot request!

parings: Touya Todoroki x reader

wordcount: 1.4K

notes: actually took forever because I forgot what kids do in their free time

warnings: none

summary: you find a cool spot you’d like to show Touya, shenanigans ensue.

You feel your lungs by start to burn as your run as quick as you can towards to best friends house.

You knock almost violently on the door when Rei Todoroki opens it.

“Miss L/N? Is everything okay?” She says with a worried tone.

You nod your head quickly before you say breathlessly, “I-i have something super cool to show Touya!”

Rei chuckles nervously at your excitement, “he’s in his room, I remember correctly.”

You mutter a quick thank you before booking it towards Touya’s room, only to find it empty.

Now you weren’t too concerned by the fact Touya wasn’t in his room like he was supposed to be, if he wasn’t holed up in his room then he’d be holed up at Sekoto peak over using his quirk in the name of ‘training’.

You shrug before making your way back to the front door, you weren’t planning on telling Rei that her son was up at the peak, he made you promise not to anyway.

Sekoto peak wasn’t the farthest away from the Todoroki household but by the time you got there at the summit you could feel your legs aching.

Now all that was left was to walk up it…

You could make out flashes of red as you hiked up the trail, few sparks of blue which was curious since Touya’s was red?

No point on dwelling on it.

You yell out his name, scaring him before running up to him excitedly.

“Y/N- you scared the hell out of me-“ he blabbers out.

You try to make your voice serious as you speak, “Touya- you absolutely need to follow me now, we’re going on adventure.”

Touya scoffs softly, “adventure? What are you- twelve?”

You stare at Touya after he choices his words, quietly as the seconds tick by.

He clears his throat, “ahem- sorry uhm, where are you trying to take me?” His voice is steady unlike yours, “can’t tell, it’s a surprise.”

“Then scram, I’m training right now Y/N.” He starts to walk off over to his little training corner with the log before you grab his wrist.

“Please Touya?” You beg with a pout on your face.

Touya try’s to tug his wrist away, “Nope, I don’t know what I’m getting myself into.” You groan before pulling him back, “Touya- don’t be a brat I’m trying to show you something cool!” You continue to plead.

“You trying to fight me now? I’ll win.” He says almost threateningly.

you tug again, “you built like a prepubescent chicken- look Touya please just do this for me?”

You and Touya enter an unspoken eye staring contest, Touya loses by looking away nervously and you could almost feel his skin heating up.

“Fine, take me to your stupid spot.” He says lowly, but it doesn’t have any venom behind it.

You celebrate silently in your head before dragging him down the mountain, then towards the woods near your own home.

Touya’s brows furrow, “are you planning on murdering me or something?” his voice could be described as a fake out between ‘I’m so scared!’ And pure sarcasm.

You shrug, “keep up the attitude and I just might.”

He laughs at that one.

You climb over smaller bushes and duck under branches before entering a thicker part of the woods, you got lost in it one time and your parents had called every emergency number they knew.

Touya still dogs on you for it til this day.

Whilst trekking throughout the woods your legs decided to make home with a near by rose bush that hooked into your skin painfully.

You yelp before trying to ease the small thorns out of your poor calf but Touya decides to help out for once.

“Don’t move.” His voice was stern when he said it but his face was filled with worry practically.

He grabs you calf then the vine and pulls the two apart gently, only to leave a small stinging sensation in the wounded area.

“Be glad it’s not bleeding.” He hops over the vines to join you, you kinda hopped his leg would get stuck too for karma but you’ll get revenge soon.

Revenge for everything you’ve done to get him to this cool spot, made your legs sore, made them injured- what’s next? A broken arm?!

You continue to walk throughout the forest, the ground below you getting wetter with each step. Then you could finally hear the faint noise of water rushing.

You walked out nearer towards it before hitting a drop off but luckily you had already scooped out the terrain. There was and edge that you could scoot by on if you held on good and if you fell you- probably- wouldn’t die!

Before you could get to it Touya grabs your hand, “that isn’t safe, find another way.” his brows furrow.

“This is the only way that I know, hold on and you’ll be fine-“ “Y/N I don’t want you getting hurt.” He cuts you off before you can rationalize with him.

“Touya I’ve done this before, I’m not gonna fall.” You smile while you say this but then Touya made it fade quickly with his next words.

“I’ve seen Bridge to Terabithia, don’t play with me Y/N.” His tone is serious but it almost sounds like he’s messing with you.

You mumble out a small fine then Touya smiles like he won, you don’t like that cockiness.

So you quickly run back and scoot the wall almost expertly, pieces of rock falling down below as you move.

Touya calls for your name but by the time you respond d your already on the other side, “see- I told you I’d be fine!” You smile cheekily.

Touya visibly relaxs before his face goes mean again, “you could’ve fallen.”

“Yet I didn’t?”

“I’ll push you down myself.”

You scoff, “thought you didn’t want me getting hurt?”

Touya groans as you start to skip off towards the rushing water, it’s a nice little spot but it has logs all around it like some parkour obby.

Touya watches as you walk over towards one, it’s over a larger area of water- hell it evens look deep.

“Touya, be careful here since it’s slippery.” you sound sweeter than usual, Touya notes.

Touya cautious steps onto the log with the water calmly drifting beneath him, truly it wasn’t hard to balance on it.

You step behind him following close, then you wind your arms back and push him into the water with all your strength. He hits the water with a loud splash, it only takes him a few seconds to resurface.

“Y/N- are you fucking crazy!?” He yells out, you could barely hear him from your own cackling.

You don’t even notice when he grabs your own ankle to drag you down with him.

You yelp before hitting the water, whilst falling you accidentally hit your back against the log.

When you plop back up from the water, coughing violently. You can hear Touya laughing at you, you splash water at him before he could continue.

“Psh- don’t be angry that I got you back!” He yells, his voice sounds light.

Like he’s having fun.

You and Touya continue to have a splashing fight before you raise your hands up, “okay- we’re still not there yet-“ he splashes you again.

“Touya!” He stops for a moment, listening to you.

“It’s a little up ahead, follow me.” You trek through the water, making your way past floating branches or jagged rocks.

Touya could faintly hear water falling, then he felt the water become much more shallow.

The two of you continued to walk throughout the shallow water before it starts to rush before your feet, once Touya look up the first thing he sees is a miniature waterfall.

You turn back to look at him, “isn’t it amazing Touya?” Your smile is bright.

He can’t help it when his faces starts to match yours, you just have that affect on him.

He watches you run up to the falls, collecting rocks or whatever you do.

He can’t help but think how glad he was that he stopped training, even for a moment.

He felt good, his heart felt warm.

you just have that affect on him.

EXTRA:

“Touya- why in the world are you soaking wet?!” Rei practically screams.

Touya stumbles over his words for a moment before speaking, “uhm- next question?”

“Were you out training again?!” Rei says her voice going softer.

“Uhm….next question?” Touya says whilst looking down.

He’s never going on adventure with you again.

[ssatorussuguru]

i've just spent the day reading like every batfam fic of yours and i just had to say i'm in loveee with your characterizations, as well as your writing style!! the way u write steph is literally chef's kiss, let alone the rest of them

i know you put up a list of some of your favorite steph fics and i was wondering if you could also give recs for tim drake and/or dick grayson?

this means so much to me thank u <33 steph is so compelling to me and im also driven by hatred towards dc for how little they use her/how they ruin her writing when they bother with her at all

i made a rec list for dick and tim+dick too, and i meant to link them all together but ive just realized that i never did that my bad!!

dick tim+dick steph tim

those are the ones ive made so far, and under the cut are more dick ones that ive since read!! im unsure if you meant for a tim one specifically but if so, just drop me another ask and ill make one :)) its no trouble at all i have a lot of fun with these!

poison oak - Dick saves Jason from the vigilante life. In turn, Jason saves him back.

in this or any other universe - Dick Grayson (DCU) accidentally lands himself in Battinson’s Gotham. (one of my top top top favs)

gotham academy shenanigans - In which Dick, Artemis, and Barbara are friends at school during Young Justice Season One like they should've been.

oh but if i could choose, i would choose not to feel - "His eyes flicked over the long room, evaluating and searching. When he finally spotted him, Bruce’s heart plummeted. Dick Grayson was slouched at the crumb flecked bar counter, staring blankly into a barely touched pint with a hand twisted in his hair. Misery personified."

door, opening - The Red Hood pulls the thread on a mystery big enough to bridge the distance between two cities, two brothers: The plot they unravel is far deeper and darker than a garden-variety drug trafficking scheme. A story about siblingship, hauntings, and rivers. (another fav)

stray marshmallows - stray fluffy ficlets about Dick and Bruce from 2024 that belong nowhere else.

early morning emergency - “Um,” asks the little voice at the other end of the phone, “are you Selina?”

Selina pulls the phone away from her face to check the screen again, making sure that she’s not going crazy. No, the phone calling her is definitely Batman’s.

“What,” she says, “the hell?”

the futility of a man's protest - How Dick joins the Batfam Suicide Squad in an inverse superhero-supervillain universe.

and life is long (and you are young) - Bruce Wayne: Teen Bat extraordinaire, and his (mis)adventures with Robin and more.

all of dustorange's fics

[tastywormfood]

Ive tried to get my feelings about Moominvalley s4 into words, but im having a really hard time even accepting them. But ill try!

So here's my thoughts in Moominvalley s4.

Im 23 now and i remember being 12 - 15 figuring out my identity, and the only "representation" in mrdia being basically either "Bury your gays" trope or just queerbaiting. I grew up on a base level thinking i wasnt allowed to exist, and if i still dared to, tragedy would be my only birth right.

I believed i wasnt allowed to live a happy, soft AND queer life, cause no media i had seen had ever showed me that, that was a possibility.

Both the 90's Moomin series and Moominvalley 2019 are my comfort shows. I fall asleep to them at night, i listen to them like a podcast while im working or outside, they even calm my panic attacks. I collect cups, plushies, i collect the Comics and even some of the books.

I have 3 Moomin tattoos. This universe means a damn lot to me, and to thousands of ppl world wide.

As a queer person i find incredible comfort in Tove Janssons work, and you have to be a fool to be unable to see the way Snufkin and Moomintroll are written together.

I have been following this show since early 2020 and have watched interview to interview, ive listened to the podcast more times than i can count, and they knew what they were doing.

From the beginning of the show they deliberately wrote Snufkin and Moomin to be something more, they even confess In a BTS that their Moomin might like Snufkin more than Snorkmaiden. Even the podcast talked about it!! We are not crazy!!!

I feel incredibly gaslit by the entire situation, and suddenly im 14 again being told im reading too much into it.

Idk what happened inbetween S3 and 4, but it felt like all the love and care that came from the show, just disappeared?

Ignoring Snufmin for a second, every episode this season felt like a filler. It has no plot, followed up on nothing from the last seasons, and had an extreme amount of loose ends.

The former seasons, especially s1 and 2 has such amazing writting, character development and just a feeling of patience and of softness, i would watch it and think everything would be okay... But this season felt stripped of every inch of the care Tove Jansson put into her universe.

I want to talk a little about Moomintroll.

One of Moomins character Arcs is his want to grow up, its his need to be taken seriously and his need for independence and adventure. His need to step out of his dads shadow, and to be his own moomin! The character development he had built up through out the seasons, completely and utterly disappeared. There is no trace of anything in s4.

He is right back to where he started in s1, not being able to stand up for himself and say no, not having the confidence to go on adventures and right back to idealizing his dad. If anything this entire season felt like a prequal! Cause at least s1 Moomintroll wanted to learn, and was activily trying to change.

Moomintroll truly felt like a side character this season, i dont even think he has any important moments. Unless you count Comet in Moominvalley (which i dont), where all his independence has disappeared. Moominpapa literally has to push him out. He made one decision that eps, which was to float down the river instead of walking, which ended up being the wrong and slower way.

The regression Moomintroll went threw this season is heartbreaking, and thats not my Moomin.

Focusing for a bit on Snufkin, this season felt like a slap to the face.

They know that Snufkin is one of their most popular characters right? If not the most popular. If anything he is at least in the top 3, not only in Moominvalley but in the rest of the moominverse.

So why did this season feel like Snufkin erasure?

He was barely in it, and when he was all of that glow that normally radiats from him was all gone. He felt like the husk of a character.

This version of Snufkin was on of my favs, cause you could actually see his flaws and disagree with his actions. He had room to grow, and he did, he truly did.

He learned from Moomin just like Moomin learned from him. Their characters Arcs co align witch each other, their relationship and interactions are the pillars of the entire show. Snufkin and Moomintroll are what make the show proceed.

Finding the 2019 show for the first time as an 18 year old gave me confirmation and trust, that i was allowed to live a soft and slow life as a queer person. If Moomintroll and Snufkin could have that kind of beautiful queer slow burn romance, then i had a chance to as well.

They knew that a big part of their viewers are queer, and they knew how popular Snufmin was. They knew what kind of ppl they attracted, or they wouldnt have made it like that.

All the soft moments, the longing, the zoom in on eye contact, the zoom in on hand holding. They said trust us, they said be patient, and then they threw everything they had been building up out and set fire to it.

We got Queerbaited, and i truly havnt felt this feeling for a while. We got actual queer shows now, ofc they all end up being cancelled! But they exist!

This show felt like it was crafted with so much love and care, that i completely let my guard down. The entire queer Moomin community did a 5 year long trustfall, just to hit the floor the last second.

Season 4 of Moominvalley felt empty. It felt lost of all care and love. The first 3 seasons felt handcrafted by warm hands, season 4 felt machine made. Easy to digest, with no real soul.

Season 4 of Moominvalley feels souless.

I have chosen to live in a world where Comet in Moominvalley is a prequal to s4 and that s4 is a prequal to s1. The true last season was S3 and Moominvalley ended with Snufkin and Moomin walking arm in arm. Thats the only way i can Rationalize everything.

I have so much more to say, but ill stop here for now. Hope all of you are doing okay<3

[the-s1lly-corner]

*explodes into your request box*

HEY HEY HEY, im back.

Came to ask an platonic Child!reader with the rest of the gang.

BUT HEAR ME OUT

Child reader is like an wolf in sheep's clothing, like reader has an cute expression on their face but when someone tries to touch them, they'll go like: "touch me and ill rip your hand off" in a full innocent voice and that cute smile.

And child reader has shark teeth.

Tyy!

*explodes*

- 🦭

The cast x child!reader (platonic)

throwing this together after waking up from a really nice nap! i still have the kinger request to work on but my brains still stumped.. sobs.. requests are still open by the way! you can find the link to my rules in my previous post, or you can look in my pinned! :O apologies if some sections for the characters are a little short, my brains still a lil okfvokffvovf from waking up TToTT

CAINE:

a child? in the circus?

he doesnt quite know how to make of it, i mean... its not like he has to make any accommodations, the circus is a place for all ages afterall!

i give you this new concept: dad caine

lightly scolds you when you threaten someone, bad manners!

i think he would be like a stereotypical eccentric dad

in house adventures seem to tone down just a touch so theyre not too intense or dangerous for you, keeps an eye on you to make sure you dont get stuck anywhere or flung across the room

rip bubble, you probably pop them when theyre within a foot of you

pinches your cheek only to have his hand comically chomped off ("now now (reader)! what did i tell you about biting! time out!)

POMNI:

similar confusion that caine has, but like, more so

how did a kid even get their hands on one of the headsets??

honestly i think pomni might be the type to be uncomfortable around kids; she doesnt hate them she just doesnt know what to do with them

also kids can possess a different kind of cruelness when they really put their minds to it and shes already in a mentally precarious position as it is

she doesnt avoid you though!

was bitten a grand total of one times, she made the mistake of trying to take you somewhere during an IHA and she didnt make you aware that she was going to put her hand on your shoulder

JAX:

okay you cant swear in the circus, but i feel like jax has some very creative ways to work around that, making these new colorful euphemisms that dont skip out on the crudeness. he teaches you some of his favorites just to watch the world burn

lightning fast reflexes, should you try to bite or hit him; not that hes going to try to put his hands on you

actually

i can see him picking you up via scooping his hands under your arms, or literally just holding you up by the scruff of your next

congrats theres now the image of jax holding a flailing sheep child in our heads. his shins will be kicked in the second you get put down

thinks its funny when people have to do double takes when you let out a threat or say something dark

RAGATHA:

i think she would be a cool babysitter, or big sister figure to you

similar to caine she will lightly scold you when you're being 'rude'

doesnt try to figure out why you dont like being touched, also respects it. respects your space as well, she doesnt totally baby you

she is a little sad that a kid so young got stuck in the digital world, though

even if you could remember things, i dont think she would ask out of fear of possibly upsetting you

likes making you little things (small pillows, plushes, ect) since i can see her being into sewing.. might be because shes a doll, though

KINGER:

i said it once and ill say it again, kinger is dad. like i already hc he had kids before getting stuck in the digital world, but i also like to hc that he and gangle have a dad/kid relationship, at least when kinger was less... paranoid

like he still has the capacity to be a father figure to you, but i think with you being a little... ermrmfl.. he might be a little put off

tells you stories about "being a king" (ie embellishing the one time he was put in charge during an IHA ages ago) and tells you about some previous in house adventures

youre so short he genuinely doesnt see you approaching sometimes so he either gets jumpscared by you or literally trips over you on accident

is so so apologetic once he gets over the initial shock of suddenly meeting the floor

really if you follow this guy around and show interest in his interests hes gonna adopt you

he knows your threats arent empty, even if they arent hes not going to try to find out

ZOOBLE:

zooble seems like the type of person to find some vague amusement in kids swearing or saying out of pocket stuff, i cant explain why

cant teach you swear words thanks to the censoring of the digital world but hey... they can still spell it out...

honestly i hc that zooble themselves doesnt like being touched so hey you dont have to worry about that, they personally get it

cool older sibling energy. while ragatha gives off sweet n caring older sister, zooble gives off the energy of a cool older sibling who like. idfk skateboards or something

zooble skateboarding real

not much else to say here

GANGLE:

similar to pomnis but this is more so because gangle is intimidated by other people thanks to her shyness!

i think gangle would be in the same boat as you and zooble, in terms of touching, but in gangles case its because shes made of ribbon and thus can be pushed around very easily

would cry on the off chance you snap at her :(

she lets you into her room sometimes to let you draw with her! kids like drawing right?

thats her reasoning, at least

i mean hey, it gives you something to do and gives you a break from all the chaos

actually pretty okay when her comedy mask isnt broken, actually makes an attempt to properly get to know you and crack a few jokes

[sparklehounds]

I would be SO down to hear about the made up hollowivy narrative in your head. Just btw

well.......

if you say so <3

considering the post mentioned uprooted by the antlers ill just throw in lyrics that make me think of them to start in no particular order and without any explanation because its 3am and im eepy

ive always thought of them as having a dynamic where hollowpaw has a crush at first sight and ivypaw is just kind of there until she gets to know him more and they become friends. i feel like she would have started sneaking out to see him and they would maybe visit the horseplace for fun at night when they weren't training or they would explore beyond the woods to practice their new fighting moves. he's very bad at hiding his crush but also ivypaw is so obscenely oblivious to it that it's painful. she's just focused on the fact that she finally has made a friend and since she's never really had one before she has no idea what a Social Cue is

they probably would eventually get caught sneaking out (ivypaw by dovepaw of course, how could she not hear her sister leaving for long periods of time?) and eventually it has to come to an end especially as they get closer to the battle. before the battle happens they meet one more time, go on one more little adventure, and hollowflight tells her how he feels, they're in love, blahblahblah. they go to battle, hollowflight is killed when ivypool isn't there to help him, and she is devastated and feels guilty about the whole thing

i personally try to pretend fernsong doesn't exist in canon because his entire relationship with ivy makes my head hurt (sorry fernsong, i just don't love characters dating their close relatives) but if i had to fit him into this narrative it would be as a poor rebound on ivypool's part. (and also in this universe they are not related, by magic or whatever.) she is haunted by her old friend in her dreams here and there, mainly nightmares where they are back in the dark forest and he is killed by hawkfrost in front of her (because it wouldn't be ivypool if it wasn't ptsd)

but i think the appeal for him with her was that (in this narrative) he was the only one who was unconditionally kind to her and understood what she was going through. we know literally nothing about his family so i like to imagine he's got some weird dramatic backstory or family drama like she has, and they bond over it while training.

i also feel like this idea also adds a layer to ivypool being so pissed that dovewing got to leave thunderclan to be with her mate in shadowclan. she wanted that to be her and hollowflight and it's just another thing that she feels like dovewing holds above her (spoiler: dovewing still did nothing wrong in this story ivy is just deeply mentally ill (affectionate))

i suppose to talk about some of the lyrics, i think that ivypool became a drypaw after hollowflight's death. as it is with crossclan riverclan relationships, i think he taught her how to swim (on top of what she learned in the dark forest) and maybe catch fish, and now she can't stand the thought of swimming, both for the reminder of that gross sludgy dark forest water and of her old friend.

i could probably talk more but again. eepy. should sleep. my eyes kinda hurt. here's a drawing of them as payment for letting me talk because this is my art account after all

[sixerstanley]

YESSSSS FORD WONDERING

Because Ford clings to what he knows when he's conflicted, he clings to the facts and the statistics and the statistics say being a homeless teenager is dangerous and potentially lethal, so he watches TV to see Stan's shadey commercials because that means he's alive and he's fine and he's making the most of that charisma Ford always admired and taking everything he can and leaving nothing left. But. The commercials are always coming from somewhere new, with a new name, and a different style, and it was easy to think it was just Stanley lying and cheating his way through adventures across the country but it wasn't easy to hear the worry in his Ma's voice whenever she said Stan only ever calls her from payphones and can never give her an address. But when he's between dimensions he has a lot of time to wonder about what he left behind, and he wonders why he as the weaker twin, running on fumes and half-dead, could knock his brother around. And he wonders why he sent his postcard to a motel. And he wonders why great successful Stan was still driving the old beater he'd cobbled together when he was 15. And he wonders if Stan had beaten the odds, or if the odds had beaten him. And he wonders if Stanley's still living like that, back in their dimension, or if that life killed him. He tries not to think about it, because he didn't think he'd ever know

anon im going to go crazy ur so smart and have wonderful ideas that HURT ME SO MUCH BUT IN A GOOD WAY. OUGH.

it literally drives me so so crazy. ford refuses to think about that stuff because he really, really doesn't want to acknowledge the horror stan had to face. plus, ford was dealing with a lot of shit too! albeit, he was dealing with it later, when he was dealing with bill + pushed into the portal, but ugh. i imagine when his thoughts would wander while he was really tired after pulling all-nighters at backupsmore, hed just shake himself out of it.

I think there's a part of him that finds comfort in the anger. And i don't mean that that means he's evil or a bad guy or anything--he's just human. He reminds himself that Stan wronged him and that knowing him, he's fine. he's fine. he's fine.

I feel like there's a stubbornness within ford that wants to stay angry. to stay mad. And he knows that if he found out or knew what stan actually had to go through, he wouldn't be as mad anymore, so he convinces himself that stan is fine

(also, this is making me think about a ghost! stan au that was swirling in my mind lmao, but ill make that a different post)

anyways i hope any of this made sense LMAO

[mrradmccoolman]

AHHHH sorry it's been so long!! welcome or welcome back to

ELLIOTT'S ANDERPERRY SONG ANALYSIS

today's song issss....

Spider by Momma

this one is very much a todd-centric song for me-- specifically focusing on his relationship with himself considering the way his family and the people around him treat him. the andersons are soooo unexplored in the movie and have such potential for a complicated and realistic family dynamic. i hope this analysis gives some insight into how i perceive both todd and the andersons as a whole-- i could go on and on about them, but ill try to keep this shorter for your sake!!

"blessed by every little universe" i see this lyric as how todd perceives his brother, jeffrey, to be. now personally, i see jeffrey as being a good big brother in general, who simply falls into the trap todd's parents and the people around him do-- they don't quite know what to do with him/understand him. (understand this is very much headcanon territory here; as i mentioned, todd's relationship with his family and brother is woefully unexplored in canon. many people see jeffrey as distant or even neglectful of todd, which isn't in any way a wrong perspective, but it's just different from the one i myself take :)) as much as todd loves his brother, he can't help but feel bitter sometimes at the way things seem to come so easily for jeff. one of the hardest things about having undiagnosed anxiety is that you truly believe everyone else around you is experiencing the same level of anxiety as you are, they're just better at dealing with it, and there's something inherently wrong with/weak about you that you can't. that was my experience, at least, and i think todd would feel the same way. not to mention jeffrey's various accomplishments; he's smart, well liked, sporty, and fulfills his parents expectations. things are surely more complicated than that, but todd may frequently feel like he's lesser than his brother, and of the two of them, his brother is blessed in every conceivable way, perfect to the point that his excellence extends to every possible universe with him in it. this lyric is also a parallel to one that todd uses to describe himself, which ill get into later.

"in a web, he's praying" this is another lyric i believe to be todd describing jeffrey. this means multiple things; it could be in relation to the religious aspect of welton/todd's upbringing, perhaps about how in jeffrey's personal 'web', he's meeting their parents expectations of faithfulness. it could also be about jeffrey praying for him; i think of a young todd praying to god to make him better, to fix him somehow. who knows if jeffrey or his parents actually pray for such things, but todd wouldn't put it past them. he wonders if jeffrey wishes for a better brother, one more talented, more outgoing, less like todd.

"big plans, an orchard i could call my own; a bed, a roof, my savings" in this lyric, todd refers to himself and his future with wry sarcasm when he says he has "big plans", because despite the adventurous future his parents have set out for him, he knows he cannot fulfill them. it's not just that he knows they won't make him happy; it's that he knows no matter what he does or how hard he tries, he'll be a disappointment to them regardless. therefore, his actual "big plans"-- or what he sees as the only things he'll ever manage to achieve-- are simple: somewhere to sleep and a roof over his head, perhaps on a farm somewhere where he works to pay rent (there's nothing wrong with doing so, but in his parents minds, to do so would mark him as a failure forever). his idea of his future is bleak and drab, because he doesn't believe he can amount to anything worthwhile.

"like a spider catching nothing" this particular lyric was what first made me think of this as a todd song, but i did some digging on the symbolism and found it fits even more. i like to look at genius lyrics sometimes when im not sure what a lyric means, just to gain some perspective, even if the way i personally see it isn't the way the artist originally wrote it to be. (that's the great thing about music!) i was curious what the artist meant with this line, but couldn't find anything on it, so i looked it up on its own to see if it was a thing people had written about and found this article. (just want to make it clear-- i don't know anything about this website or it's religious connections, but i did think the article was cool!) one of the ways it describes the symbolism of the spider really resonated with me in relation to Todd. it describes a spider's web as representing the mind and the string of consciousness, the complicated patterns being our thoughts. it also describes how presumably, early spiders were unable to differentiate between sticky and non-sticky webs, and so got caught in their own webs-- "unsuccessful spiders". it's with this perspective that i relate this line to todd. todd is so frequently anxious and caught up in his own thoughts that he finds himself paralyzed with indecision or making the wrong choice, too entangled in his own web to get free. what should be his safe space is instead another trap for him to spiral into, and what should be natural for him is instead the very thing that trips him up (social norms, relationships, self-esteem, etc etc). i use "should be" very loosely here because that's not necessarily true, but it's the way todd has been told he should be. he is an unsuccessful spider, catching nothing yet spinning web after web anyways with no end, getting entangled in his own trap. his web is a metaphor for many things: his anxiety, his self-esteem, etc.

"caught up in the highest corner of the room" while this line alludes once again to the spider metaphor, it also outlines how todd distances himself from other people, either by choice or circumstance. whether he wants to or not, he feels he doesn't belong/connect with other people, and sits on the outskirts instead. he doesn't know how to fit in socially even though he wants to build friendships, and convinces himself it's safer to stick to the sidelines anyways, even though it makes him unhappy. not only this, but it's hard for him to relate to other people. he feels like no one understands him. i think specifically back on when he first moves to welton, and all the poets are hanging out in his and neil's room. though it isn't conscious, he's excluded for the most part. the others can percieve that he's different than them and act accordingly. it isn't out of malice, but it still hurts him. it even takes neil quite a bit before he truly gets todd and how he feels.

"spun out and staying" todd is exhausted with being on edge all the time, "spun out", but he doesn't know what to do to stop it because nobody understands. he's alone and feels there's nothing he can do to change it, so he stays where he is because it's the only thing he knows.

"i'll watch, pretending that they're watching me" todd watches the people around him attentively, perhaps jealous of what appears to him to be ease at connecting with others. he observes them as examples of what a 'normal' person looks like and tries to imitate them. wistfully, he pretends people see him back, and are paying attention to him, even though he finds himself fading into the background.

"got good technique in faking; schooled in every little universe" lo and behold, it's the parallel to jeffrey i mentioned earlier!! todd is well-practiced in pretending things are fine, or at the very least, going under the radar. this could also be in relation to how he hides many aspects of his personality from the people around him; ex: when he receives a second desk set from his parents, even though he feels frustrated and hurt, he doesn't tell them how he feels. the "every little universe" part is a callback to the previous lyric; he feels so inadequate that he doesn't believe there is a universe where he manages to meet anyone's expectations.

"well-taught in waiting" todd is used to this sense of stasis, perhaps waiting for someone to notice or care about him, or for something to look forward to when everything feels so insurmountable. consider the dead poets society meetings, practicing with neil, writing poetry, etc. he's practiced in dealing with the things around him by surviving off of morsels of hope.

"no shine, heaven takes a lot of work; i've heard some people saying" while todd feels that friendships and success come easily to other people (for example, jeffrey) he thinks bitterly that for someone like him, it would take a lot of effort to meet the world's expectations, work that would not look pretty. he believes this because he's heard the people around him saying these sorts of things as he grew up, essentially saying he needs to shape up and do the work to be the man they believe he needs to become. in tandem, they imply that he himself is a lot of work, and/or hard to deal with. the lack of support and understanding he receives for his mental health really shows how other people would treat him, especially his parents. having a loved one with mental health issues is a learning process, one that im afraid nobody was willing to go through for todd until he meets the poets.

"they see what they wanna see" todd believes that no matter what he does, he will always be seen as a failure, as inherently wrong. nothing will ever change that, and he's exhausted with bothering to try, so he feels resigned to his reputation. no one will understand him, so why try explaining himself or connecting with others?

"i stick to diabolatry, it's my breed" diabolatry is defined as "the act of worshiping demons and devils." i see this as reference to both his sexuality and mental health struggles, both of which are attributed to the devil and satanic practices throughout history. todd and the people around him try to ignore these things about him, but deep down todd can't escape them; they're part of him. diabolatry is "(his) breed" because his anxiety, depression, and sexuality are part of who he is.

"planting empty seeds" todd is repeatedly told both through words and actions that the things he cares about are worthless and paltry, and that they won't result in success, which is what his family thinks matters most. anything other than what they expect of him is an empty waste of time that will never grow into anything substantial, so he shouldn't invest in it at all.

"everything is bad in me" the last new lyric, and this one is pretty self-explanatory. the whole song culminates in todd's ultimate belief: that he is the thing that's wrong, not the world around him. he expresses his frustrations, but when push comes to shove he knows that it's him that is the problem, and he's foolish for blaming anything else, but he can't help it. (of course, we know that's not true, but things aren't that simple for him.)

i hope you all enjoyed!! this was a fun dive into todd's character for me and an explanation of how it feels to deal with severe anxiety when the people around you don't understand/think you're just overreacting. it's something ive dealt with all throughout my life, especially from family, no matter how well-intentioned they were. let me know your thoughts!! :)

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