#and we read all their stuff in senior year 💔💔

[nezuscribe]

being an old ap kid and now an honors college kid means that all the books you read in highschool are still the same ones you're reading now

[ropes3amthoughts]

My little sister told me I needed to watch more “real people” movies and shows because I told her I hadn’t seen a lot of stuff so we sat down and watched “I Am Not Okay With This” and that show was pretty awesome I enjoyed it and it ended on such a crazy cliffhanger but it was cancelled so there was no more 💔 and we were upset so we looked up the graphic novel afterwards and lemme tell you guys that ending was depressing as shit I hope the show doesn’t do that because that would be a very sad message

Ok I just start rambling beyond this point lmao

Also I’m pretty sure my sister recommended that because she thinks I’m a lesbian lmao ok so it might sound crazy to anybody reading this because like everyone of my Tumblr buddies know me as gayboy Kabruliker but I’m nonbinary and I double dip with being gay I dabble in a bit of both though not really in real life lmao I hardly ever feel about people that way not in fiction but in fiction it’s fair game gender don’t matter n stuff but like since I’m afab (not out to my family because they’re transphobic) and I don’t find irl guys attractive and I had a crush on my friend who was a girl in middle school and also I like stuff like Arcane and I do think real girls are pretty even if I rarely actually like like them I think my sister thinks I’m a lesbian especially bc this one time we were talking about celebrity crushes and she recommended I just “get one” because “it’s fun” and her recommendation for me was Billie Eilish lmaooo it’s sweet she’s supportive even though I’m not a lesbian I mean I think if I were to identify with anything it would be demiromantic (and then like panromantic too because it’s not like gender based? Idfk man) asexual because I have had two crushes in real life before but I just might not get one again? I kind of figure I’d get one in the middle of high school because I had one on a guy in third grade (which is the middle of elementary) and I had one on a girl in seventh grade (which is the middle of middle school) but I’m halfway done my senior year of high school and nada so I guess that’s just not happening lol it’s not too big a deal though I don’t want a partner like super badly but sometimes it’s awkward when I’m talking to people and they’re like “who do you have a crush on” and I tell them it’s no one lmao

That was all kind of nonsense rambling lol I just thought my sister thinking I’m a lesbian is kinda silly but also sweet and I guess I kinda wanted to share my identity too I mean I’m not totally confident in it and I feel like pinpointing exactly what it is is kinda difficult but idk I feel like it would surprise some people to know I find fictional women attractive maybe even more so than fictional men like in Dungeon Meshi I could name you like 5 attractive women and the only attractive man I’d tell you is Kabru lmao ok sorry I can’t stop talking about him ever

Oh yeah so for the ending of the graphic novel, spoilers obviously, for the graphic novel, it ends with Sydney blowing her own head up and like that’s such a fucked up message like mentally ill grieving gay girl who feels like she makes everything worse kills herself to solve her problems like what if there were people who could really relate and they see that she just kills herself 😭 I don’t think I’d try to explode my own head or anything but I think I’d feel a little discouraged with overcoming grief and stuff y’know I mean it can end sad no one has to make it end happy and the graphic novel is called “I Am Not Okay With This” so like maybe it’s saying the ending isn’t ok and that’s like not the solution but idk man it felt anticlimactic and depressing like she never takes control of her life and feels guilty and sad forever bro I mean maybe I’m reading into it wrong but it sure as hell felt sad 😭 I like what the show did better and I’m definitely biased because I watched that first but I feel like it fleshed stuff out more and I found the characters pretty fun n stuff like y’know?

Ok also spoilers for the show. Lowkey I should probably get a diary too because I just ramble about everything online but whatever it’s not like online can be stolen like in the show lmao bro how did Brad even steal Syd’s diary like did she leave it at the counselor’s office and then Brad was like “oh I know her I can give it to her” and the counselor just trusted him or something lmao like what also why was the show rated M none of the sex or violence was all that explicit like the sex was implied and cut away from and Brad’s head exploding wasn’t like super visceral I don’t think. I feel like the show coulda done a little less with flashbacks though like there were only 7 20 minute episodes and so much of it was the same footage! Wish there could’ve been a bit more 💔 it was fun though I liked it it was funny it was interesting I enjoyed it I’d recommend it even I actually think this got recommended to me a while ago lmao but I’m so slow to start (and finish) stuff lol. I mean this is kinda my diary bc I’m pretty sure nobody reads my nonsense rants except me lmao and that’s chill it’s just nice to rant sometimes

[dokiyeom]

DORI DEAREST 💔💔😭😭😭💔💔😭😭 mmm i will have a lot of free time & since it's the last trimester of the school year and most exams are alr done, it will be less stressful + more fun so yay! but i will still have to study for my two last exams but i hope i can get more into writing & prepare for uni!! im also planning on throwing a bday party for my 18th bday in april so yayaya 🥳🥳

aww no :( i hope ur doing better and that ur well!! SENIOR TRIP??? hello that sounds so cool ! ive always wanted to go to japan so that just sounds super fun 2 !! no no igu it's the same where i live, u basically only see Dutch people during the holidays because they (+ english tourists) love this area LMAOO

NO NO ITS ALRIGHT HAHA i was only sure because he posted a bunch of other pics without the mask yk so don't be embarrassed 🙏 ok and what if i watch an episode today . what then . BUT YES DO SO!! i love it when people ramble about shows or other stuff 🫡

YAYAY scoups said they would have a cb in april and another one this year during caratland but he didn't mention the exact date so im just patiently waiting for the official announcement 🤭🤭 since im an april baby ill just ask my friends to get me that & ask my 1 kpop fan friend (that sounds funny idk why) to organize it since it's pretty complicated to buy an album with all the versions 👎👎 IM AN ARIES .. or a taurus?? april 20 baby here so it's right between them yk? but i did some research about zodiac signs and personality and bla bla bla && decided im more an aries hihi 😇 also why are u losing ur mind over photoshop im curious, tell me all about it!!

dori dearest indeed :D ykw i should start making individual tags for my moots so i can tag dori dearest on these :DD and aagh excited for u to have free time !!!! i’m vv much looking forward to reading whatever u write !!!

thank uu !! i just hung out w family friends && we had malatang && sukiyaki + milk tea & a strawb matcha chiffon cake that i baked + two whole tomahawk steaks && played sm mahjong !! i don’t have any cousins/extended family where i live,, so my family friends have really grown to feel like my family ?? and i literally love them sm,, like hanging out w them today has absolutely made this month exponentially better :D

&& yesyes im actually going back to japan for a bit next month,, so hopefully i’ll b able to buy some tickets to more popular exhibits n stuff domestically in advance for the trip w my friends :D ticketing there is literally insane if ur buying them internationally omg,,, vv much a nightmare process && DORI UR DUTCH ?? woah omg :000

if u watch an ep,, PLS LMK LMAO i need people to talk to abt hospital playlist bc it’s my literal fav thing ever,, like istg it’s the only thing keeping me sane rn :0 AND ALSO HELLO UR BORN ON 420 && SHARE A BDAY W JAY FROM ENHA,, stop i’m so jealous i literally share a bday w,, noah centineo,,, && aagh i hope it’s released around a time that’s convenient for ur friend to buy the album as a gift for u !!!!! tbh if it’s that time too,, mayb i can find it for slightly cheaper in japan :00

and dori. i’m like. constantly losing my mind over photoshop and sudoku. and digital magazines that require paid subscriptions to read their articles. but photoshop is just,, vv difficult to navigate atm bc i’ve only started using it a month ish ago to learn graphic design !!! so i still have a long way (and many more headaches) to go until im comfy && can use photoshop fluently <//3

[ca-3]

Sakuya is Gay.

that's it. that's the post.

jk or more accurately titled

"Sakuya Watanuki is a Gay Character and Here's Why I Think So."

(Edit: Part 2 of this post is here. hehe)

and why he 100% most definitely undoubtedly has a massive crush on Mahiru Shirota and I am writing this post(s) in honor of my favorite Servamp character and Pride Month 🌈💚

I know I said some of this stuff before in the past, but SO MANY things have come out since then and I haven't really had a reason to talk about some of these. So I thought it would be fun cause I haven't made a post like this in awhile ✨

It's insane how much content Sakuya has outside of the main story and I feel like a lot from him gets forgotten or some don't know about some of this stuff since he hasn't been physically in the story for awhile again 💔 maybe Tanaka Strike has certain main story plans later... but when you look over all these bits and pieces of the serious and the even silly stuff, you really start to realize this boy is definitely "🌈🌈🌈"

To start off real quick I feel like mentioning that we do have to remember that while Sakuya and Mahiru weren't actually childhood friends they were still together for a whole year before the events of the canon Servamp story began. Meaning Sakuya definitely had plenty of time to fall for Mahiru even if he probably didn't realize it yet. So if you really think about it, Sakuya and Mahiru have known each longer than most other characters in Servamp. Outside of like you know, any family relationships in the series.

Drama CD moments:

Sakuya confessing his “undying love” for Mahiru (In the 2016 April Fool's Day "SERVAMP School" announcement, it is stated that the way he would pursue Mahiru by insisting on walking him home everyday while proclaiming his undying love to him.)

This whole CD was apparently like an dating sim lol just read this synopsis, "Who will Mahiru ends up with? Will he go with the tsundere chibi who insists on paying him lunch while calling it troublesome? Or will he go with the lazy blue-haired senior who likes to invite him to eat ramen together? Or perhaps with the green-haired classmate who insists on walking him back home together everyday while proclaiming his undying love to him? You’ll find it all out in “SERVAMP School”.

this CD is apparently also called the Vampire-only Spring Vacation (x)

Mahiru:

"Aaaah, vampire-like options appeared all of a sudden! That was close – I was just about to forget you guys are vampires!!"

School bell rings.

"Tttttwahh!! Lunch break’s gonna end if we keep saying stupid stuff like this!! I haven’t even eaten lunch yet!!

[DING!]

Lawless:

[Now then. Who will you eat lunch with?]

[1. Lawless-chan and Lichtan]

Mikuni:

[2. The unpleasant upperclassman]

Tsubaki:

[3. The student council]

"Now MahiMahi! Who do you ch-"

Mahiru: "Yo! I’m gonna go look for Sakuya!! Bye now!!"

Runs off. (x)

April Fool's Day or not, this CD is very indeed telling of Tanaka Strike's previous BL works. Yes Tanaka Strike made tons of BL/yaoi mangas,doujins, and one shots before Servamp so keep that in mind too.

Sakuya getting super flustered by Mahiru calling him “Sakkun”. in the Servamp Drama CD “The Vampire-only Summer Vacation” Episode 3 (I recommend listening to this one, Sakuya's panicking near the end makes it extremely worth it, he's so cute here <3)

Sakuya: "For me... S-S-"Sakkun"... or something..."

Mahiru: "Heh? S-Sakuya? You wanted to be called something like that?"

Sakuya: "A-ah! No! J-just kidding! J-joking!! Ahahahah!! H-how much of what I just said was a lie-?"

Mahiru: "S-Sakkun…"

Sakuya: "U-uwahh!! I was lying!! Lying!! Mahiru you DUMMY—!!"

(also small thing that I also think is cute here is the fact Mahiru was not into the whole nicknames thing that everyone was doing until Sakuya wanted one and then tries to make him happy by saying it❤️)

In Servamp Idol Festival Track 4, Sakuya misses Mahiru so much he has Mahiru merch and has made his own Mahiru plushies. (Even though he said he can barely thread a needle in the main story... my more own personal headcanon here is that Sakuya probably said that just he spend more time with Mahiru alone, cause why else?) Tsubaki and Belkia are shocked by how much Mahiru merchandise he has too.

In the same drama CD Sakuya signed his name as "MahiMahilove" in his letter about hating his bosses demands and wanting to see his friend. (x)

I can't find the exact CD name, but there's one where Kuro and Misono get part time jobs and Sakuya is there working too. When Sakuya sees Kuro and Misono without Mahiru and immediately starts asking why isn't Mahiru with them. Misono even mocks Sakuya for this lmao.

Sakuya: "and where's Mahiru? Why's the cat here but Mahiru isn't? Mahiru should be here."

Misono: "When you open your mouth all that comes out is "Mahiru Mahiru." Don't you have other friends than him?"

rip Koyuki and Ryuusei I guess oof

Going to put the rest under "keep reading" cause this post is already long 😅

The drama CD Servamp "Much Ado About Nothing Filled with Vampires" Track 3 - Switch: Where half the main cast switches bodies, Sakuya immediately goes to "Mahiru's" side (not knowing it's currently Kuro in Mahiru's body lmao) worried about him because Mahiru looks "gloomy". Since it's actually Kuro, he doesn't know how to respond and only says "nya..." causing Sakuya to further panic that "Mahiru" is not acting like himself. Also Sakuya really wanted to switch bodies with Mahiru too after figuring out the truth. (x)

In Servamp Idol Festival Track 4, Sakuya asks Tsubaki for 50,000 yen (which about $394 in USD at least lol) so he can take Mahiru to get Yakiniku. (Sakuya might have been planning to take Mahiru somewhere pretty nice cause Yakiniku is generally considered a luxury dining option in Japan apparently when I searched it up.) (x)

In the CD "Much Ado About Nothing Filled with Vampires" Track 1, Sakuya talks about the sauna being good for your blood flow and Mahiru brings up not wanting to talk about that in front of a bunch of vampires and Sakuya reassures Mahiru he won't bite him. (I wonder if this is in slight reference to Sakuya saying whenever they used to hang out he always felt very thirsty... I wonder if he really meant that or not.)

Sakuya: "I hear it’s good for blood flow, too."

Sakuya: "What do you think, Mahiru?"

Mahiru: "Uh… I mean, well… I’d rather avoid talking about blood in front of vampires…"

Sakuya: "It’s okay! I won’t bite you."

Tsubaki: "Sakuya, you’re coming on too strong."

Tsubaki: "I don’t remember raising you to be so beastly."

(god even Tsubaki knows his son is gay)

In a comic gene bonus, Servamp Mini-drama CD “Steam Vampire Chapter”, where Tsubaki and Belkia find Sloth Pair at the hot springs and when they return to their room telling Sakuya he should have came with them and Sakuya said it was still a "definite no" until they mentioned Mahiru was there and they immediately have his attention, "Mahiru!? Mahiru came here?" meaning he would have definitely shown up if he knew Mahiru was there lol (r.i.p to you Sakuya) (x)

and of course I didn't forget the 10th Anniversary CD track 6 because holy god, this is one of the most recent ones and I swear everything was over the top and so was Sakuya's obvious feelings for Mahiru. Strike isn't even being subtle anymore... (x)

Sakuya is extremely moved Mahiru listened to his "depressing monologue" in the previous tracks with Tsubaki lmao

Sakuya says he can hear Mahiru's voice sometimes even when he's not around.

Literally attempts to attack Mikuni WITH HIS CHAINSAW WHICH WE HAVEN'T SEEN SINCE CHAPTER 32 IN VOLUME 6 AND TELLS HIM TO STAY AWAY FROM MAHIRU. Also Mahiru pretty much sics Sakuya on Mikuni like a guard dog here too anyways... 😅

There's a moment where he is talking to Mahiru and they talk about the past for a brief moment or as Sakuya puts it "Let's continue talking about our feelings, Mahiru!"

Sakuya gushes to Mahiru about a time where they went shopping together on their way home for the first time and how his "heart was pounding like crazy the entire time." Sakuya words actually make Mahiru flustered as well while he remembers the memory of it.

Sakuya continues to gush to Mahiru, but he won't shut up to the point where they literally fade him out while he continues to talk with Mahiru and Tsubaki says "feel free to ignore this child."

Manga/SLS comic moments:

Most recently from the 2022 character popularity poll comic look how happy Sakuya is that he and Mahiru ranked so close together in the postcard rankings 💚

This entire SLS comic from Sleepy Life of Servamp Volume 1 ... I don't need to say much else (lol it's meant to be a joke about how Sakuya is low key "yandere" even he doesn't really display these exact traits in the main story, but still I can't with this boy) the only other time Sakuya is referred to as a "yandere" is in the Servamp Idol Festival drama CD as said by Belkia... but only cause they are freaked out by Sakuya's collection 😅

From the 10th Servamp Anniversary party booklet: Sakuya literally pulling an Edward Cullen and protecting Mahiru(and kitty Kuro) from a truck and acting like it's nothing lmaooo (x)

At the end of volume 9 there's a comic about the anime version of Sevamp being announced and while all the characters have their own takes about what its focus will be. Sakuya wants it to be about him and Mahiru in highschool (Strike makes this boy talk about Mahiru any chance he can get, my god)

I wonder if he was hoping for a coming of age or slice of life story or some kind of high school romance... 🤔

Anime moments:

After the first Sakuya-centric arc is over in the anime Sakuya replaces Kuro in the anime ending for one episode and it shows him smiling at Mahiru 💚 like this wasn't at all necessary to do... But the anime team did it anyways and I feel like it for a good reason. It really shows that even they can't always be together now Sakuya means just as much to Mahiru as Kuro does :') like Mahiru does have other bonds with characters, but they REALLY made it a point here. Sakuya is what made Mahiru take getting stronger way more serious and want to find a good way to put an end to Tsubaki's plans. Not only for the other Servamps and Eves, but for his best friend too.

Also I'm convinced the anime team low key ships them the most now after seeing them here on the blu-ray/dvd box and all the other extra anime style content they gave us lol (I'm joking but also...??👀)

This scene is completely anime only(the entire ending of the anime was completely made up anyways) but I think this really shows Sakuya would protect Mahiru if he saw Mahiru in immediate danger. We haven't seen anything like this in the manga version yet, but I believe something very similar might happen if given the chance. For example, Mahiru never did the key ability before in the manga like he did here in the anime at first. Eventually years later he did it in the manga, but it happened a bit differently. GOD LET SAKUMAHI REUNITE IN THE MANGA ALREADY.

In fact the anime did cut out a scene from volume 4 where Sakuya protects Sloth Pair from Belkia. Although they didn't know it was Sakuya who did it. They thought Belkia just disappeared out of nowhere.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

and yes, we're still not done... Cause here's some bonus stuff!!

I want to talk about this because this probably a more obscure "SakuMahi moment", if we can really call it that... 😂 (it's more of a moment between Yuto Suzuki and Takuma Terashima, but their are acting out their characters and using their voices so..?)

But there was a seiyuu event called "Servamp Festival: Find your Partner!" Or "Secret Door challenge" and the Servamp voice actors played a little game where they were basically kind of role-playing as their respective characters and had to find their partners behind a door guessing by the sound of their voice. (basically Mahiru had to find Kuro, Licht had to find Hyde and so on) The catch was that their voices were pitched to make it more difficult for them.

but Mahiru(Terushima) didn't guess correctly and instead of finding Kuro(Yuki) behind the door.... He found Sakuya(Yuto) and well,, 👀

Host: "Please open the door!"

Terushima(Mahiru): "It was you guys! It's Sakuya!!"

Suzuki(Sakuya): "MAHIRU~!!!"

Terushima(Mahiru): "Aaaa! I feel weird fate! Stop it!"

I feel like even Suzuki knows that Sakuya is a little bit too into Mahiru that he just really played up this moment here. I mean, look at him stretching out his hand like that and he sounded so happy when yelling out "MAHIRU!!!" :D (also I like how Belkia's VA just kinda ignores them lol)

I do recommend watching the full version of this, it's a very entertaining seiyuu event 😂 although I don't think you'll find a fully translated version anymore...

There's a lot of Land of Nod events too and other bonus contents as well, like Parallel Summer, Servamp Valentines event and my personal favorite the Halloween event on Tanaka Box...

So this is definitely not everything I can find but I'm going to make a part 2 to this since I can't add more images anyways, sucks tumblr doesn't more than 10 pictures on text posts anymore💀 and this likely won't be the end of this Sakuya's eternal pining for Mahiru until they finally reunite in the main story...

This ship is my favorite, but also absolute pain... 🤡 if you read this far, WOW THANKS SO MUCH ❤❤❤

To be continued...

✨🌈Happy Pride Month🌈✨