#and we can chalk some of it up to bad writing don't get me wrong

[necrotic-nephilim]

i think stephcass could have been potentially interesting if fandom let steph be herself and not ultimate uwu girl boss erasing all her negative traits. where is her jealousy? unhealthy obsession with her crush and complete lack of understanding of the concept of boundaries ESPECIALLY if that person is already dating someone? where is her almost manic urge to push away other potential love interests (and at this point i realized she would NOT have been so chill with ives if tim had come out much earlier yikes)

BIG AGREE OH MY GOD YOU PUT IT INTO WORDS.

because i love TimSteph for the reasons you listed!! there's something very unhealthy and teen girl-ish in the way Steph approaches relationships. she's angrily jealous and she thinks about Tim in a possessive way. like she is just so consumed by him and it's meant to be male comic writers writing how they think teen girls write about boys in their diaries- but it comes off as incredibly toxic. it's one of her deepest character flaws and what endears me so much to 90s Steph. she throws herself so deeply into romance when she has it, like she's afraid if she lets go of it for even a second it's going to leave her. and god forbid you be the person she falls for bc you will never maintain a healthy relationship with someone she views as competition, she *will* sabotage it. and to me these are all pros of her character. i *like* seeing how vigilantes struggle to maintain normal relationships- *especially* teenage vigilantes. Steph struggles to balance her "regular" life with being Spoiler and what things deserve a Stephanie Brown reaction and what things deserve a Spoiler reaction. and when she's dating, it's almost *always* going to be a Spoiler reaction and she shades her relationships through that lense. it's why civilian partners for Steph never really interest me. (besides the fact they always feel forced and clunky, like Steph's recent think with Maps' older brother?) it doesn't explore the way Steph loves to her fullest extent and how far she goes when she's into someone. there's no sweet puppy love for Steph, when she's all in, she's *all* in. she will do what she thinks is best for Tim oftentimes by her own will without his knowledge or approval, and sometimes massively fucks things up for him. bc she's just so wrapped up in what she believes is best, consequences are secondary.

and sure, she maintains healthy friendships. bc most fodder with StephCass is very healthy and soft. bc it's a *friendship*. and it changes radically when Steph is involved romantically. it's why there's such a difference in how Steph regards Tim when they're just friends as to when they were dating. she loves him and he's always going to be important, but that obsessive passion isn't what drives them anymore. so it's something you have to consider with *any* Steph ship in which it's a character she's had a friendship with- that how she interacts with them as a friend doesn't necessarily inform how she'd regard them as a lover. and that's the issue with StephCass. even the StephCass content that *is* comics informed (tho, a lot of it isn't and while i don't think fanon needs to be based on the comics to be good, i do think Steph and Cass are difficult characters to tackle if you aren't at least semi-familiar with their canon content bc of how warped they are in the fandom-) comes off with such a rose-colored lense that sours it for me. hell, even on Cass' side, things she's *canonically* done have been weird and obsessive about Steph. but that's never explored.

(tbh dare i say it's something to do with the phenomena in fandom that yuri is morally pure and perfect and yaoi is always dirty and bad- there's this almost sanitizing of sapphic ships sometimes to make them perfect and cute together and while i'm not here to yuck someone else's yum, i do think it's *telling* that women in fandom never get to explore the complex depths of unhealthy and toxic love in the way men do bc if you make a woman evil, it's misogyny. if you sexualize a woman too much it's misogyny. if you write her doing morally fucked up things even with the understanding it is her canon character, it's misogyny and you're villainizing her. i can sit here and say Tim is canonically shitty at relationships and ppl will not. if i say the same about Steph, then i'm critiquing a woman and holding her to an unfair standard. it's exhausting. it feels like StephCass only ever exists to depict Steph and Cass as morally pure and in love angels kissing in the background while the men get to do complex and nuanced and fun things in the foreground. this thought has probably been far more explored by others with more developed nuance on it, but i just wanted to point it out bc it's a very real thing i keep seeing *especially* in the Batfam fandom-)

and equally i think Cass' reaction to this intensity and obsession from Steph could be interesting. Cass historically has had poor reactions to knowing everyone is attracted to her and thinking about her, so that level of intensity i think could cause some negative reactions out of Cass that would add some very layered conflict to the ship. some of Steph's most negative traits *do* clash with Cass' wants and needs. it makes the ship more fun! it puts Steph's flaws on display as well as Cass' flaws and her internal issues surrounding romance. StephCass could be so weird and fucked up. but it's been defanged by this fandom in a way that turns me off to it. i love both Steph and Cass and i love exploring sapphic Batfam ships, so it *should* work for me. but the irony of it being popular in anti spaces combined with no one being able to acknowledge the flaws either of these characters have for the sake of making them kiss just. bores me and it's sucked any interest i could have out of it. bc god forbid women just be a little fucked up. </3

[faulix]

btw, since people love lying about me on this website:

i have not known lolthia for a year like they claim. i first learned of lolthia about a month ago when i noticed their racist treatment of my friend. it was by chance we learned of their goretober list that had abuse glorification with prompts like medical/drugged torture, kidnapping, and stalking. we were able to see that lolthia had a pattern of writing yandere, murder, and other gross topics with a quick search of their blog. THAT is why i decided to say something and call them out. period

x

i find it kind of hilarious that you're claiming to have blocked me from servers and discord so you don't have proof. i wonder if you would even know my discord, yknow, the one handle i haven't changed in years. i mean, surely if you have me blocked you would be able to pull that up easy right? let's not forget the fact that you're claiming to know me personally when you cannot even get my pronouns right.

x

the funny part about this is that barely anyone who rb'ed your callout weren't even your mutuals, with a good amount of people actually adding in the notes how fed up they were with your bullshit. i am not a big enstars blog. i'm not even talking about enstars right now. i am a small blogger with less than 100 followers who ships with the only two minor characters in enstars. a majority of people who have rb'ed your callout are not big enstars bloggers. we are small time selfshippers just trying to have a fun time on tumblr dot com. the only one who is willfully taking themselves out of the fandom or even the circle of enstars selfshippers is you. you willfully create harmful content, you paint yourself as the victim, and you refuse to apologize for multiple things such as your racism and suicide baiting.

x

i am nice to others because they are not winding up their victim complex to make me look like the bad guy. again, if you have legitimate proof that we were once friends: look at your blocklist (or your server blocklist) and post my handle. i dare you. but then again, you probably couldn't do that considering you don't know what the username is. i think the funniest thing about it is that you can't even be bothered to post the server name, can't even bother to explain how we met (shocker considering i've only been into enstars actively for like barely a year now), it is you saying "well this is clearly my word against his" when you can't even provide the basic proof that you and i ever knew each other. you probably DON'T want me to post the ask where you said that you had finally found me and lamented that we could even be friends now if i would take back my words and be the bigger person. but then again, you kind of admitted that yourself when you said you didn't know who made the callout and even said it could be multiple people because you didn't know, but hey, let's take back that and spin it as a long rooted hate campaign by me. x

btw, when i first made this post, i held off on posting it because i haven't received nonanon asks for this, so i was able to chalk it up to you just trying to send more anons toward me to get me painted as the villain, but since this morning i woke up to you making a callout post about me that was filled with lies and fake screenshots it's about time i speak up. you may have deleted it, but don't worry, i made sure to screenshot everything you said and put it in an imgur album to refresh your memory. right here, don't worry, i took every screenshot word for word so you can remember what you said.

i'm not going to post every single screenshot to this. i think it would be insane behavior to make this post even longer. so let me just some up my feelings:

in your fake screenshots not only did you try to blur out what my name was (probably because these are not actually talking about me, but hey, you thought you could make it work, right?) but you proceed to, once again, continuously use the wrong pronouns for me, which is kind of weird since you're claiming to have known me for a year.

let me reiterate this so you get it through you thick skull: i use he/it pronouns and have been doing so for years now. your callout and screenshots repeatedly uses the wrong pronouns for me. do not even bother claiming you didn't know or that i recently changed them as my past blog and every single friend i'm close with will testify to my pronouns, and i'm absolutely sick of you misgendering and degendering me and my identity. considering you've been sending me several asks you could have easily looked and my pronouns in both my description and pinned, but hey, that's another lie for you, right?

then you post a screenshot of a server main chat, but it's very convenient of you to 1.) not get the server name and 2.) leave out the date you sent it, yknow, the things that you could at least say we shared together. i wonder why you didn't bother to get that information if it was so important. oh wait, i do! it's because you are deliberately lying about me to paint yourself as the victim.

i'm not going to even dissect the lies you weave together because, once again, you are speaking without proof. this is not a case of "my words against his" you are deliberately spreading lies on the grounds that you think no one will fact check you, you tool. again, if i was such a danger to you that i would deliberately make several accounts to surpass your "ban", why would you not post my discord username or the "alt accounts" i made to protect others for safety? why don't you do so now? oh! it's because you don't know them and are lying through your teeth.

i did not send you an ask where i told you that you needed to change your goretober list to get rid of the necrophilia. if i did, how about you post it with my url and call me wrong. not to mention the biggest thing i called you out on was the fact that you were glorifying and romanticizing abuse with drugged torture, kidnapping, and stalking. but sure let's gloss over that part because that would make you look bad!

there is nothing out of context in what you said or did, it is in plain english, several screenshots where you demonized a selfshipper of color because "they were more popular than you", pulled several excuses out of your ass to ship with a 16 year old, and put suicide baits in the main enstars tags, oh but don't worry! in your eyes the enstars fandom deserved it! and you want to paint yourself as innocent? give me a fucking break.

and the absolute gall of you to proclaim you acted like this because of your bpd, which you're still rb'ing sad bpd posts now. the nerve of you to assume i am not neurotypical when i have been struggling with autism and adhd all my life, and my own bpd for the past 14 years since i was diagnosed. it is not an act of ableism to call you out on your disgusting behavior towards people of color and abuse victims. i don't care about your backstory. you know exactly what you are doing and say that you are "exploring dark themes". no one believes you, and no one ever will. and miss me with that "i didn't know the shipper's race" as if you did not see the commissions you were directly complaining about them that shows them as not white very obviously. but hey, what's one more lie for you?

just so you know: every single ask you have sent me i have kept. from where you pretended to be 10 different people, all from your original ask where you think we should "just talk it out" without you taking any accountability, thanking me for the callout, pretending to be anons sticking up for you, and even threatening me with fake evidence that i have been in enstars servers sending death threats. but hey, since i didn't respond to those so you could have ammunition as so you could say i'm stalking you and villainizing you, i guess the next step would be a callout!

i will never be as obsessed with you as you are with me. you are the stupidest person on this planet if you genuinely thought i would not catch wind of what you were doing, from sending me and my friends and mutuals several asks to deliberately lying about me on your own blog. you have sent me over 50 asks in 24 hours, spamming my inbox with anons, but you couldn't even bother changing your typing style. you can't be bothered to tell people to watch out for this discord user because, again, you don't even know who i am. you can spin a web of lies to cover your ass, but barely anyone sees through it, and no amount of anons you send yourself will never convince anyone, especially strangers who has seen your blog. i do not care about how you no longer can look forward to your sick goretober where you glorify the abuse that real people go through. i am a grown adult with a job, school life, friends, pets, and so much more. maybe you could be the same if you shaped up and stopped being on tumblr. touch some grass for once. no one will believe you. i will not delete your callout. you have deliberately done horrible acts and acted like you were being demonized because "the enstars fandom and selfshippers are mean and cliquey", as if people don't see right through what you post without care and how you act. either apologize for what you have willfully done or log off and deactivate. i don't care which. leave me alone, leave my friends and mutuals alone, and grow up.

btw, i figured i would also throw this in the enstars tags so people would know about your horrible act and how you have treated me and demonized me for the past two days for standing up for my friends and the people you've hurt. here's the original callout btw, just in case anyone's new here! i don't care how badly you say this affects you because, again the only person trying to demonize you is you yourself. you lie about every aspect to save your ass and i will not take it. i mean, you tagged my "callout" with enstars tags (despite the fact that i never interact with the enstars fandom and have been talking about brc for the past month) but hey! if you wanna act like a clown i'll treat you like one.

you are an absolute moron if you think 1.) anyone would believe you considering your past behavior and 2.) thought i would just lay over and start crytyping for an apology. you are 20 years old acting like a spoiled toddler who got punished for throwing toys at others. i have more resolve, a backbone, and friends that will always care for me and support me, sorry if you can't relate. fuck you

[theerurishipper]

Ok I am going to be controversial. If I'm honest, I don’t really understand the desire for Adrien to turn his back on Ladybug at the end of Strikeback. That's partly because I don't completely get what the writers intended Adrien’s struggle to be about in Season 4. I understand what Ladybug did wrong, but my thing is…

Does CN ever actually express to LB why he is upset in Season 4? Does he ever try to reason with her or advocate for himself?

I don’t remember him approaching the real issue until they were under Risk’s influence and he says “maybe that’s because you never tell me anything.”  I also remember that overall fallout feeling really muddy throughout the season.

From what I see, Chat Noir’s most valid reason for being upset is because she’s keeping him, her loyal partner, at a distance. She’s not communicating as well to the point that he ends up confused, outside of the plan a few times. He finds out she told someone her identity even though she's always been massively against that. Toward the end, he discovers she’s been working with an active Rena Furtive without making him aware. She said nothing between them would change, but he can sense this new distance and her secrecy. He doesn't quite know what to make of it, but he can't help but feel a bit betrayed. He deserves at least to know things like when a new Ladybug shows up at random or a secret miraculous holder being in the field with them.

So you'd think that would be the clear cut reason, but I'm not sure? The writing gives mixed messages and Adrien brings a lot of his own baggage to the table. The increased neglect and secrecy by Ladybug is one facet , but if we’re being honest about what we were shown, there are some more factors:

The side effects of the guardianship in itself. The nature of the guardianship means Ladybug is now a leader responsible for the kwami and involving many more holders. More holders make defeating Monarch easier and Paris more safe, but it also means less time as a duo and more competition to play on CN’s insecurity. He worried about his being replaced as early as Season 3 with Carapace. His insecurity is exacerbated by her distance, but also by more holders in general. The average person might not have been as upset at getting a "break" for a few rounds, but to Adrien, it's a sign that he is finally being replaced. Even if he knew about Rena Furtive, I’m willing to bet he still would have felt uneasy about her threatening their relationship.

He is in love with her. Kuro Neko’s messaging is all over the place, but Plagg wasn’t completely wrong. Ladybug’s increased distance and secrecy hurts 50 times worse because Chat Noir is in love with her. If he were in love with Marinette instead at that point, he might even enjoy the extra load off and having fun with his friends at school, but he is very much in love with Ladybug. That makes his suffering hit much harder.

He’s upset about Carapace and Rena Rouge knowing each other's identities even though he can’t know Ladybug’s. To be fair, I rate the other holders' identities BS pretty low on my list of things to rage at Ladybug about because after Season 3 when all the heroes were revealed and Ladybug continued to give the same heroes their miraculous while also still being really anxious over identities, it was so nonsensical that I chalked it up to plot convenience rather than Marinette just being this stupid and risky. The show was not about to design new hero models so logic be damned. I don’t blame her for this anymore than I blame Chat Noir for being stupidly bad in battle at random a.k.a nerfed to make Ladybug look better. I also acknowledge the rules for the Ladybug and Cat miraculous hold an elevated risk. If Monarch knows Rena and Carapace identities he maybe has two new miraculous. If he knows Ladybug and Cat’s identities, he has his wish and the world is rewritten. 

His father also started neglecting him more after a big change in their lives. He’s projected his relationship with his father onto his relationship with Ladybug as early as Glaciator when she didn’t make it to his date. So possible PTSD.

There are also the reasons that the fandom projects onto Adrien as things he 'should' be upset about, but is never actually upset about and have never had any canon ground:

She’s the leader and the only holder with a cure. They’ve never been exactly equal despite that one line and he’s never had an issue with this on the battlefield. He only wants to know what’s going on. If he does have some leftover resentment at Fu not choosing or training him, his beef is with Fu.

He doesn’t know other holders identities. He’s only ever cared to know Ladybug’s. And this may be controversial opinion, but even if he wanted Ladybug to tell him the other holders’ identities, would he be justified in that? He’s not a guardian. Why is he entitled to demand the guardian hand them over? Especially without their permission?

Her plan with Luka to reveal their identities and erase his memory. This is to me her most egregious offense in season 4 and if he knew about it, it would make the argument against his forgiveness much stronger in my eyes. But he doesn’t. And it becomes obsolete information after the episode.

Even with all these heavy factors, all valid reasons to be upset, the only reason that validates righteous anger from CN’s pov and doesn’t make him look like kind of a tool is her secrecy around Rena Furtive and him discovering her keeping him out of the loop on some need to know info in Hacksan and one or two other eps. Emotionally, it goes much deeper than this for him. But these represent her responsibility in the matter.

The reason I can't see him justified in cutting ties with her in Strikeback though is that... this doesn't come up? He can't say he's tried to communicate with her. Nothing like “you’re keeping things I need to know from me and I don’t like it” or “you said things wouldn’t change between us as partners but you’ve distanced yourself from me. we started this together”. Nothing before Strikeback. I could see if he'd tried to talk about it and she dismissed him and didn’t try to fix things. But there’s no conversation around this in particular.

The weird thing is a lot of the other reasons come up in canon through his voice or someone else’s or both. He’s in love with her. He doesn't know what he'd do without her. All the new partners make him feel insecure and irrelevant. Why can’t we know each others’ identity and they can? In other words, the reasons that make him seem overemotional and self centered. These reasons also all center her or the desire for her love and adoration rather than his feelings as her partner. That’s what’s highlighted in Season 4.

But the actual legit criticism and bone to be picked with Ladybug herself does not come out of his mouth until he is under Risk's influence. Even then, it’s a one-liner. I don’t remember him ever actually trying to touch on the real problem with her prior to that. He either smiles and shrugs it off, even when she asks if he is ok, or he lashes out and runs away.  He doesn’t breach the topic and if he doesn’t communicate it, how can they work through it? 

Kuro Neko was the perfect opportunity to have Adrien really vent, but the initial argument is a textbook miscommunication. He shows up smiling over his pain and cracking jokes. Therefore she doesn’t realize how upset he is. Then he pushes the subject even though she’s out of time and she snaps at him for not listening. Hurt, he snaps back and runs. Plagg blames it on heartbreak alone. Ladybug takes that bait and laments that there’s nothing she can do but dote on him a bit because hey he’s just heartbroken. She's not responsible for his unrequited love. At the end, he never mentions the legitimate issues and nothing is ever wrapped up. That’s where I start to think, did the writers even mean for him feeling diminished as a ‘partner’ to be a real issue? Did they intend for this to be a lovesick issue from the start?

I don’t think this is just on Ladybug being impossible to talk to because of some vibe she sends out or her making sad face. Chat Noir has been pretty cross with Ladybug before over other less justified matters and she didn’t crumble or smote him. She did throw him in the trash but that took 4 seasons of being calm and reasonable in the face of some behavior that wasn’t always great on his part. He is usually the one supporting her, but she managed not to meltdown while he was struggling in Guilttrip and Reverser and support him.  She’s not glass and she’s not his father and I think he knows that on some level. I think his lack of communication is partially his upbringing.

But mostly, he's just written to undermine himself. Ladybug isn’t the only voice box for the writers. Adrien is too. Everyone in the show works to serve a particular narrative so it’s no wonder that his most valid complaint against Ladybug in Season 4 was buried under all of the less noble ones, even from his own lips. He needed Risk just to confront her on the part she was actually responsible for. Odd choice. I guess he wouldn’t have been the perfect boyfriend if he did it without Risk?

I think a decent percentage of the rage at LB in Season 4 is made more intense and inflated in combination with all those other factors. We as the viewers know Adrien's trauma, how starved for love he is, what little support system he has vs the act he puts on as both Adrien and Chat Noir. We know too the meta fact that the writers never allowed CN the dignity to be rightfully upset about it or voice his most valid displeasure at anytime except when he was under the influence of a villain.

Taking the show at surface level, I can see him forgiving her. I just wished they had talked about it. Adrien isn't helpless in the face of Ladybug. He's faced Gabriel. He went to school and told him he didn't want to model and opened up about feeling like his father never wants to talk to him. so I know he can be more honest with Ladybug without a villain spell. The only reason I can think of it never reaching that point is because the writers didn't want it to. Not only do I think that he would have expressed himself well and honestly enough if given the moment, but I think there’s a good chance Ladybug would have tried to fix things if she actually knew what he was upset about and didn't reduce it to 'he's in love with me.' Which I can't completely blame her for. She had help from both Plagg and Adrien.

Maybe that’s just me being wishful about the blorbos, but my early season blorbos are better than their later season counterparts. The latter just seem like shills for a plot that doesn't match them.

I really miss early Adrien anyhow. He took a lot more flack then because he messed up more because he actually had a personality that allowed him to disagree and have sassy moments. Sometimes he was right, sometimes wrong, but at least he felt more layered. 

Whew, this is a long ask! I'll take this part by part.

Ok I am going to be controversial. If I'm honest, I don’t really understand the desire for Adrien to turn his back on Ladybug at the end of Strikeback. That's partly because I don't completely get what the writers intended Adrien’s struggle to be about in Season 4. I understand what Ladybug did wrong, but my thing is…

The thing is, I don't want him to turn his back on Ladybug in Strikeback. I've said before that I love that scene. What spoils is for me is that the conflict is never addressed after that episode, and it just makes it come off as Chat Noir pushing away his hurt to be there for Ladybug once more. Like he just accepted that he'll be treated in ways he doesn't like. The scene in isolation is one of my favorites, but it's how the aftermath was dealt with that makes it bad.

Does CN ever actually express to LB why he is upset in Season 4? Does he ever try to reason with her or advocate for himself? I don’t remember him approaching the real issue until they were under Risk’s influence and he says “maybe that’s because you never tell me anything.”  I also remember that overall fallout feeling really muddy throughout the season.

You're partially right. He doesn't really try to actually talk with her until Risk/Strikeback. And part of this is because of his own trauma. But the other part of it is also because Ladybug has also become more and more unapproachable over the course of the season. When he does try to approach her in some way, he gets shut down.

You're pretty spot on about the other reasons for why he feels the way he does.

There are also the reasons that the fandom projects onto Adrien as things he 'should' be upset about, but is never actually upset about and have never had any canon ground: She’s the leader and the only holder with a cure. They’ve never been exactly equal despite that one line and he’s never had an issue with this on the battlefield. He only wants to know what’s going on. If he does have some leftover resentment at Fu not choosing or training him, his beef is with Fu.

I agree that any resentment he feels for Fu not training him isn't Marinette's fault.

This is getting long, so I'll put the rest of it under the cut.

He doesn’t know other holders identities. He’s only ever cared to know Ladybug’s. And this may be controversial opinion, but even if he wanted Ladybug to tell him the other holders’ identities, would he be justified in that? He’s not a guardian. Why is he entitled to demand the guardian hand them over? Especially without their permission?

So, he isn't entitled to their identities. I personally think he would have been justified in wanting to know before Season 4, but it's not really that way anymore. But in any case, that isn't the issue. The issue is Ladybug playing loose and fast with the rules, allowing others to know their identities and even revealing her own identity to someone else while making sure that Chat Noir sticks to the rules. He has a right to be upset about that.

Her plan with Luka to reveal their identities and erase his memory. This is to me her most egregious offense in season 4 and if he knew about it, it would make the argument against his forgiveness much stronger in my eyes. But he doesn’t. And it becomes obsolete information after the episode.

The point is that it shouldn't have become obsolete. She was going to do something awful to him. I don't think it should have been thrown aside. He should know about it. She's shown that she's willing to take advantage of his trust and she never actually learnt any lesson about not doing that or that it was wrong. He's entitled to information about her actions that could potentially have harmed him. That's something she should admit to.

The reason I can't see him justified in cutting ties with her in Strikeback though is that... this doesn't come up? He can't say he's tried to communicate with her. Nothing like “you’re keeping things I need to know from me and I don’t like it” or “you said things wouldn’t change between us as partners but you’ve distanced yourself from me. we started this together”. Nothing before Strikeback. I could see if he'd tried to talk about it and she dismissed him and didn’t try to fix things. But there’s no conversation around this in particular.

I think the reason for this is clear in your own next paragraph. I will say again that him cutting ties with her in Strikeback is not something that I want.

The weird thing is a lot of the other reasons come up in canon through his voice or someone else’s or both. He’s in love with her. He doesn't know what he'd do without her. All the new partners make him feel insecure and irrelevant. Why can’t we know each others’ identity and they can? In other words, the reasons that make him seem overemotional and self centered. These reasons also all center her or the desire for her love and adoration rather than his feelings as her partner. That’s what’s highlighted in Season 4.

And that's exactly it. The season spends so many episodes building up this conflict between them, building up Ladybug's secret keeping and Chat Noir's increasing resentment and insecurity over the fact, and then... reduces it to him being in love with her. There are plenty of valid reasons for him to be angry with her, but Kuro Neko, the episode where the Ladynoir conflict is supposedly at an end, tells us that the reason for all this is because "Chat Noir is in love with Ladybug." I call BS.

It's a severe flaw in the writing. They reduce the conflict down to being about Chat Noir being in love with Ladybug while brushing over everything else that was set up. Him being in love with her may have been a slight factor, but it was never the main problem. If he hadn't been in love with her, he would still have the right to be pissed. Reducing it down to him being in love with her reduces the whole conflict, and Kuro Neko actually ends with Adrien saying he was too sensitive (which is Gabe rhetoric) and him apologizing to her as though she did nothing wrong at all. Kuro Neko is just... a fucking awful episode.

Kuro Neko was the perfect opportunity to have Adrien really vent, but the initial argument is a textbook miscommunication. He shows up smiling over his pain and cracking jokes. Therefore she doesn’t realize how upset he is. Then he pushes the subject even though she’s out of time and she snaps at him for not listening. Hurt, he snaps back and runs. Plagg blames it on heartbreak alone. Ladybug takes that bait and laments that there’s nothing she can do but dote on him a bit because hey he’s just heartbroken. She's not responsible for his unrequited love. At the end, he never mentions the legitimate issues and nothing is ever wrapped up. That’s where I start to think, did the writers even mean for him feeling diminished as a ‘partner’ to be a real issue? Did they intend for this to be a lovesick issue from the start?

And I think you've hit the nail right on the head. This is exactly the problem with Kuro Neko and Season 4 as a whole.

I don’t think this is just on Ladybug being impossible to talk to because of some vibe she sends out or her making sad face. Chat Noir has been pretty cross with Ladybug before over other less justified matters and she didn’t crumble or smote him. She did throw him in the trash but that took 4 seasons of being calm and reasonable in the face of some behavior that wasn’t always great on his part. He is usually the one supporting her, but she managed not to meltdown while he was struggling in Guilttrip and Reverser and support him.  She’s not glass and she’s not his father and I think he knows that on some level. I think his lack of communication is partially his upbringing.

I do sort of disagree with Ladybug being approachable. I think Glaciator 2 did do some damage. See, it's always been their dynamic to banter and for Chat Noir to flirt. Ladybug herself has enjoyed their banter and has responded to his flirtatious comments with nothing more than a small roll of her eyes. When he does it at the wrong time, she tells him to cut it out and he does. Considering that, throwing him a trashcan is unnecessarily overblown. That's way out of line. It's clearly because she's stressed out and annoyed about the situation and because of everything else going on, but him never bringing up anything so as to not upset her is a pretty reasonable interpretation after that. And it does happen again in Kuro Neko. He offers to help, she snaps at him.

The situations with Guilttrip and others like it were when it wasn't about Ladybug. She is supportive of him and she does care for him, but it's always when it's not about her. When it is about her, she never actually puts in the effort to fix the problem and just smooths over the situation (Kuro Neko, Strikeback). Of course, a lot of his lack of communication is due to his upbringing, but Ladybug is also visibly more unapproachable now.

But mostly, he's just written to undermine himself. Ladybug isn’t the only voice box for the writers. Adrien is too. Everyone in the show works to serve a particular narrative so it’s no wonder that his most valid complaint against Ladybug in Season 4 was buried under all of the less noble ones, even from his own lips. He needed Risk just to confront her on the part she was actually responsible for. Odd choice. I guess he wouldn’t have been the perfect boyfriend if he did it without Risk? I think a decent percentage of the rage at LB in Season 4 is made more intense and inflated in combination with all those other factors. We as the viewers know Adrien's trauma, how starved for love he is, what little support system he has vs the act he puts on as both Adrien and Chat Noir. We know too the meta fact that the writers never allowed CN the dignity to be rightfully upset about it or voice his most valid displeasure at anytime except when he was under the influence of a villain.

Spot on.

Taking the show at surface level, I can see him forgiving her. I just wished they had talked about it. Adrien isn't helpless in the face of Ladybug. He's faced Gabriel. He went to school and told him he didn't want to model and opened up about feeling like his father never wants to talk to him. so I know he can be more honest with Ladybug without a villain spell. The only reason I can think of it never reaching that point is because the writers didn't want it to. Not only do I think that he would have expressed himself well and honestly enough if given the moment, but I think there’s a good chance Ladybug would have tried to fix things if she actually knew what he was upset about and didn't reduce it to 'he's in love with me.' Which I can't completely blame her for. She had help from both Plagg and Adrien.

Spot on again.

Maybe that’s just me being wishful about the blorbos, but my early season blorbos are better than their later season counterparts. The latter just seem like shills for a plot that doesn't match them. I really miss early Adrien anyhow. He took a lot more flack then because he messed up more because he actually had a personality that allowed him to disagree and have sassy moments. Sometimes he was right, sometimes wrong, but at least he felt more layered. 

I will say that Miraculous trying to make the switch from a monster-of-the-week type of show to having an overarching plot was an ambitious choice, but it did not work out well, for reasons you've mentioned here.

I will also say, when I criticize Marinette, it isn't often Marinette herself that I criticize but the writing around her. The sort of writing that involves other characters bending over so that she doesn't look bad, or Adrien being reduced to her emotional support partner who doesn't demand a thing from her. That's ultimately what Season 4 had him learn, that he isn't and never will be her equal and that he should just be okay with whatever she does. And since Adrien character is that of the abuse victim who has never been allowed to be his own person, it just paints a very nasty picture. So, I think we do largely agree on many things, anon.

Thank you for your ask!

[yanderegrizzsworld]

Hi hi! I hope you're having a lovely day/night! 😃

I've recently come up with a few headcanons for the Babylon Rogues and wanted to hear your input! I've based 80% of this from the "platonic team-up with Babylon Rogues" headcanons. I tried to write similar to your style cuz I really like it! (sorry if it seems like I'm copying). These headcanons can be taken as romantic or platonic 😊

Jet is a Manipulative & Isolating and/or Monopoly(?) yandere.

I'd say that Jet is a manipulative yandere since you mentioned that he'd try to bribe his darling with the promise of riches, just so long as they join in on their heists. I agree with that headcanon a lot and it sounds pretty in character to me imo. I feel as though he would only give you a small percent of the cut just so you wouldn't have enough to want to leave on the first heist. If you threatened to leave unless he gave up more then I'd say he'd most likely budge, but only just a little. Just enough to keep you hanging around. He'd give you the excuse that "you need to prove your worth by doing few more heists until we pay you equally". In reality he just wants you to stay for as long as possible. Even after 10 or so heists you still get under paid and whenever you press him on this his only response is "soon". Unfortunately for his darling, soon means practially never (unless he's certain that you won't leave afterwards).

Now I believe that Jet would be an isolating and/or monopoly yandere due to his arrogance and superiority complex. He sees your time and attention as a competition, a competition he can't lose. I agree that he'd use his title of leader to merit himself more time with his darling and less time with everybody else. He considers himself to be far more superior than everyone else. Because of this, he assumes that out of anybody you could choose to spend time with, you'd obviously choose him. So he's just doing you a favour! Right?

Even if you straight up tell him that you don't wanna be around him he'll just wave it off and chalk it up to you having a bad day, which leads to him unintentionally gaslighting you. He'll immediately blame everybody else for your bad mood and tries to act less harsh on you.

For most of the time his behaviour is best described as "tough love" as he always tries to push you to do your hardest on missions. This normally goes without any words of affirmation but he will occasionally say a "good job", unless if Wave or Storm are present to which he only says it under his breath.

Though there are some rare moments where Jet acts "soft" around you, for example if he notices you're bothered by something he'll kick everyone out of the room and listen to any of your problems. He won't have any advice for you but he'll still be there to listen.

He doesn't really mean to be so hard on you, he just wants you two to be a power duo. He wants you both to be the wealthiest treasure hunters in the galaxy. Unfortunately, he struggles to make that possibility happen without upsetting you in the process.

Wave is a Wrong Idea & Clingy yandere.

I could definitely see Wave being a wrong idea yandere due to wanting her darling to only own gadgets made by her. After all, how dare they try and one-up her!

She wants to do everything she can to impress you. The need for your approval doesn't come from the joy of an ego boost (okay maybe sometimes :p) but instead a reminder of her place in your life. She wants to be your number one, the person you go to whenever you have a problem, even if it's a minor one. Wave is a huge over-achiever and doesn't settle for anything less than amazing.

Unfortunately this can lead to her getting a little carried away. You're having a slight problem with the kettle or coffeemaker? Bam! Now it's fixed and it also has voice recognition along with 6 other new features. She notices that your bedroom door gets a little jammed? Bam! Problem solved! Also it requires fingerprint authorisation to open now and if someone that isn't you (or her) tries to open it then you'll get a message sent straight to you both. (Also it has a built in taser).

Now as far as she's concerned, if you have a problem, there's nobody else who will fix it as good as she will and she's willing to prove that. Much like Jet, she's oblivious to the fact that she might actually be the problem.

The reason I put Wave as being a clingy yandere was because I could imagine her always wondering about what you'd think of her latest creation. She'd open the door to your room in the middle of the night and drag you out of bed to proudly show you the newest update on her extreme gear. Prior to this she'd make you a cup of coffee or tea to drink before waking you up, it's the least she could do for waking you up at 2am. While she pridefully explains all of the new features, you stand there absolutely lost and still half-asleep. The fact that she doesn't dumb anything down for you makes you even more lost (if possible).

Usually during the day if nothing is planned then she works or researches an ancient tech the group found in your company. She normally resides in your room while you both sit in comfortable silence. Most of the time your doing something in the background while every now and then you're interrupted by Wave asking for a second opinion or showing off a finished piece.

She isn't very clingy in the sense that she's very affectionate but she's always around you. If anything, you'd have to be the one to initiate it since any kind of affection makes her red and flustered.

She's actually pretty harmless overall apart from the usual rude remarks towards anyone you're close with out of jealousy (especially if it's the Sonic Team).

(Tbh I really wanted to write about a wrong idea yandere cuz they're one of my favourite types and I thought she might suit it.) (Just realised that she might be a bit more of a possessive yandere rather than a clingy one but idk.)

Storm is a Caring & Protective yandere.

Like you mentioned before, he's a gentle giant. Whereas he usually tries to seem tough towards others, he's a big softie around his darling. He's often flustered and stammering for no reason around you. He just thinks you're so amazing and doesn't wanna accidentally scare you off. Though his fidgeting, lack of eyecontact and stuttering can seem obnoxious and off-putting, he only means well.

With the only other two people in his life being Wave and Jet (who certainly aren't the nicest), it hasn't really taught him how to express his feelings well. Due to being awkward whenever he tries to give affection, he'll normally just murmur out a "you look nice today". If you're already a part of the Babylon Rogues, then more often than not he'll tell you that you did a good job out there before nervously patting you on the shoulder or head after completing a heist.

He's definitely a caring yandere imo. He always tries his best to keep you happy and can't stand to see you down. Although he's the most awkward of the three he's still by far the most affectionate. Whenever you're down he'll try to cheer you up with an accidentally bone-crushing hug (it's the thought that counts). Not only that but he's the least clingy of the three. He'd obviously want to be around you often much like any other yandere would, but he still respects your privacy.

I agree that he'd believe that with enough time you'd be as devoted as himself. Although a part of him is still protective of you and wants to keep you safe, he won't bother you too much. Whenever he hears that you're going to out hang with a friend, he only asks a few small teeny tiny questions: Who is it? Where will you be/what places are you going to? How long are you going to stay there? What will you be doing? How safe is it? When will you be back? Nothing much, right?

He allows you to hangout with almost anyone except Knuckles (he will begrudgingly allow for anyone else in the Sonic Team).

If anyone were to hurt or insult you, then they're swiftly met with a hard punch to the face and an angry albatross demanding that they apologise. Followed up by him asking if you're okay for the rest of the day.

Storm trusts you to death. He will never doubt in anything you say. You could tell him the most obvious lie and he'll take your word for it. I can and can't see him being super naive so I'd expect that he'd play along since he doesn't wanna rudely call you out on anything. He's usually worried that he might do or say something that'll make you think less of him, so he appreciates any reassurance.

After all, he wants you at his side forever! So he has to make sure that he doesn't let you down and can't let you get hurt.

(I really liked the idea of Jet and Wave being tsundere yanderes while Storm was an awkward sweetheart. I wanted to write more about Jet and Wave being touch-starved tsunderes but I realised that I had probably written a novel at this point so I left it out.)

I really really hope you don't take this as me trying to steal your spotlight or anything! I love your work and it inspired me to have a go at coming up with something myself! 

Thank you so much for your time, I really appreciate it! Have a good one! :)

(Also again sorry this is so long I got carried away 😅)

🐋~ anon

Anon, dear, the amount of times I've re-read this is absurd.

There were parts in Jet's part that made me laugh, like the fact that he'd essentially pay you the amount you'd get working in customer service, though will only budge & give you a higher pay (though not much) if you remain stubborn & I can perfectly imagine Jet's face while doing so.

His ego tends to lead to his arguments with Wave (whether or not she's a yandere too) with her arguing that he either spends too much time with us or he hogs out attention too much & he argues that, he's the leader! Of course he deserves more time with you! This just baffles everyone, except him & you ( atleast according to him). I agree that he'd just blame anyone & anything but him, you aren't upset at him, you just woke up in a bad mood! Honestly if he didn't master gaslighting then, he definitely does now with you (whether intentionally or not).

Wave is an overachiever by nature & knows few can come close to her level of intelligence (besides Tails) & as such, she'll eat up any praise directed at her. I agree that she'd more often than not go overboard with her inventions, for her it's a constant reminder of her place I'm your life & forever hopes that you'll run to her with whatever issue you have. Though I would warn, don't let her catch you accepting some gadget that wasn't made by her or going to someone else with an issue, she'll view it as being replaced/not being number one, that never happens to her! She's the best at fixing your problems! She also completely denies & refuses to entertain the idea that she's the root of your problems, what do you mean she's the reason behind your current problems? she can't be!

Wave dragging you out of bed just to show you her latest project as if she hasn't slept (girl rest) & y/n with a cup of coffee/tea while she explains everything but the fact she doesn't dumb anything down so you think she's speaking in another language & you're just standing there like

This will live in my head rent free from now on

I am such a sucker for soft yanderes & thinking of Storm being one brings a huge smile to my face. I like to think that Storm is fully aware of his brute strength & so, fights with himself because on one hand, he wants to give you the biggest, warmest bear hugs he can offer, but on the other hand, he fears he might accidentally break a bone as he does tend to forget how strong he is & while that does upset him, he more than makes up for it by words of affirmation! Expect him to shyly compliment you daily & I can guarantee you, it is the cutest thing you'll ever see. Storm isn't one to insert himself in others businesses & with you that doesn't change. He doesn't ask much, he trusts that you can take care of yourself! But if he ever overhears someone talking shit about you, man can get scary real quick, man's protective & if he has to use his stature to care others then so be it.

This man 100% trusts you, I kinda imagine that he never believes that you can intentionally lie & considers that you were just misinformed, saying something along the lines of like "Okay um... Well, last time I checked, [xyz] can't do that" or "That doesn't really sound like something Wave/Jet would say"

Storm's a good boy who's trying his best for you!

[my-gf-is-kazuichi-soda]

The selfship that almost was: my ridiculous experience with Trigger Happy Havoc.

Spoilers for Danganronpa Trigger Happy Havoc, and the bottom part of this post (starting where you see Kaito's picture) has spoilers for DR V3!

You can absolutely laugh at me for this post. Shit gets wild.

I played THH I think 2-3 years ago? It's almost a year since I played SDR2 and I played DR V3 this year.

Some time before my little sister asked me to play THH (and to let her watch me play to see my reactions), I had already spoiled myself to Chihiro's death. I didn't know her killer, but the video I saw (it was so long ago I really dont remember which video this was) mainly talked about her gender in the game. Somehow I ended up picking up the detail that Mondo trained with her, but not that he was the one that killed her?

Anyway, so going into the game I knew I would like Chihiro but tried not to get attached because I also knew she would die, so I tried to see other characters I could like. If I had been less self-conscious (keep in mind my little sister was watching me play), I would have spent more free times with Hifumi. I tried to pick a more "normal" character, or at least more normal to admit to liking?, and apparently I don't know what normal means because I thought this was Toko.

Toko was mean, but I chalked it up to her being terrified of the situation and everything happening to them. How was she supposed to trust anyone in a "killing game"?! Of course she freaks out! Of course she hides in her room! Of course she has trust issues! Okay but none of this excused how mean she was, but maybe that was her defense for being scared? I could also relate to her not exactly being warm to the other girls in the game, and I admit my first impression of Aoi was petty and negative and I didn't trust her (sorry Aoi, this was unwarranted and stupidly biased in hindsight. I didn't like her because I had this impression about her being a "mean popular girl" -because she showed off her boobs I guess???- and the rest of the game threw me off so much I didn't really stop and rethink this assumption. That was a fail on my part. Thankfully I learned not to make the mistake with Akane). It's also funny that I thought Aoi was "too girly," considering that she's one of the only canon Danganronpa girls to wear something that isn't a skirt/dress, and she was in sort of a relationship with Sakura. First impressions aren't everything, as I would realize later come to realize with Toko.

I felt so bad for Toko, and I was annoyed at the time that we were playing Makoto because I wanted to play a girl character who was nicer to her, who was lesbians with her (yes, I had a crush on Toko. HAD. You can probably guess what made that crush dissipate.) I had this idea about writing a fanfic where my s/i would try to protect her "like she's my little sister," except obviously this was a lie because she didn't want to scare her away by admitting to a crush. In hindsight, this fanfic idea would have been hilarious. Assuming I actually could win Toko's affections, I planned on being a bit annoying and clingy (simping) but doing everything to prove I was keeping her safe, she would have been pushing me as far away as possible to avoid me becoming Genocide Jack's next victim, insulting me to get me to leave while I weigh every insult against the consequence of losing the only character I made a big connection with. Also, I know I would never be able to handle a tsundere insulting me the way Toko would, but I was considering working around that by having my character be desperate to latch onto somebody to be safer during the game, though I would still try to take on the role of protecting Toko. Is it wrong that it makes me laugh to imagine writing this and then having Genocide Jack kill me? XD

I had so much trouble picking out items I thought Toko and Chihiro (the two characters I spent free times with) would like, and my sister would get impatient with me if I reset to try to pick a better item to try to activate a cutscene. I only got three cutscenes with Toko, and none with Chihiro. It was pretty frustrating when I wasn't getting anywhere. I think I talked to Yasuhiro a bit too, because my sister asked me why I was spending so much time with Toko and I didn't want her to catch onto my crush (lol).

I figured Toko probably had a secret, but my idea of it was very simple. She was showing such a tsun side, and her backstories revealed how lonely and heartbroken she was, I figured that her secret was probably something sweet and cute to show her dere side. Since she struggled to be nice to people from her trust issues, maybe she was volunteering at an animal shelter, and had a pet she was very close to waiting for her at home. We'd get to see a picture or something. Her in a shelter uniform with the dog or kitty she was fond of. Something sweet like that. That was the image in my head.

And then Chapter 2 hit me like a ton of bricks.

Chihiro's death didn't shock me, though I was surprised it showed up so early. Oh well, at least I still had Toko to spend free times with! I should probably pick another character because again, my sister would get impatient if I just spent all my free times with one character (to be fair, my sister was like 14 at the time and we had limited times to play this game, I can understand.)

It's funny, this chapter had Byakuya acting even more obnoxious, and also introduced him being Toko's crush, so I was like "ah, my rival is a total jackass." Also, he seemed hella gay and not interested at all in Toko, so I wasn't too worried. When he told Makoto not to enter a room in the library and Makoto's just like "okay! :D" I had two thoughts: "Wow, Makoto is a dumbass" (this would become a running gag with me and my sister saying this), and "Byakuya is probably the murderer. Even if it's not this case, probably another one." And when Byakuya became more obnoxious in the trial, I was like "Oh, revealing you as the murderer and seeing your execution is going to be SO satisfying. >:D"

And then... he was one of the survivors!!!

FREAKING.

Don't get me wrong! I laugh about it now. I'm laughing right now. Well played, Danganronpa. This game trolled me so much. I don't even hate Byakuya anymore, well I kinda do, but he's the character that's fun to hate. I don't seriously hate him anymore. I laugh about how ridiculously mad I got about this. Feelings about feelings are funny like that.

Speaking of which, I was even less prepared for the Toko twist because-

WHAT THE HELLL?!!!

Poorly written multiple personality disorder, AND she was a murderer, but she wasn't even the murderer for THIS case?!! I guess I can't say the game was predictable or boring, but what the hell was this?!

Also, the scissors thing and that tongue...you cant. You cant. You cant say she's straight and obsessed with men and then give her all this lesbian symbolism, game. What are you doing? From this point on, Danganronpa was confused. Or maybe I was confused, I don't know. I was so very confused. I was still attracted to her, maybe more attracted to Jack now, but what the hell was this?!?! All the directions they could have taken her character and THIS is what they chose to do with her???!!

I like to joke now: Chapter 2 is actually the first double murder in the game. They killed Chihiro in the living sense, and they totally murdered Toko's character in the writing sense, in a way that I almost wish they had really killed her off instead. That would have been kinder to her than...this...

And I thought her big secret she was a volunteer at a damn animal shelter. Help me. 😭

It really did frustrate me, because even though she was very cruel I could relate to how cold and distant she was to everybody when she was scared, her trust issues, her clearly wanting someone to protect her and care about her but also being too terrified to trust someone enough to give them the chance to do that. I think you can see where I attached to Kazuichi for...the same exact reason, damn.

But honestly, Genocide Jack wasn't even the worst part of her writing from this point (shocking, right??!!)

No, the worst part of it was that the rest of the game, Toko would only appear every once in a while to simp over Byakuya. Literally nothing else (as far as I remember). And then she would disappear and in her place would be Jack.

Which, ngl, Jack was sexy and hilarious. I know I got like, one free time event with her. But still, she wasn't Toko! :(

It frustrated me to see this character get turned into an ableist joke. Any idea of a subversion, that maybe they were telling the player that they could consider Toko's perspective, that she had a sweeter side behind her scared, bitter self, that maybe the loser girl shouldn't be rejected by everyone... NAH! She's actually mentally ill and a freak! Let's just make fun of her mental illness and separate from liking her as much as possible! That's what it felt like playing the game after this, at least when I think about Toko.

My real favorite in this game, among the survivors, was Yasuhiro. I was convinced he would be the last victim, and I was so happy he wasn't. Bless him.

I was happy to finish THH, I needed closure for the story even though it was frustrating to see characters I started to like dying almost immeadiately and having barely anybody I cared about still around. "So in the end" (to quote Sakura) I had mixed feelings about Toko, Byakuya, and Aoi being survivors (in hindsight I was judgemental and wrong about Aoi and my feelings toward her have become more positive since then!), but I was glad to see Makoto, Kyoko, and Yasuhiro as survivors. My sister wanted me to play SDR2, and I told her I needed some time to pass before I decided to take on this game. Before I agreed to it, she had to reassure me that it was so much better than THH.

I was so worried about Kazuichi going the same route as Toko, but I took a chance at trusting her, and throughout the game she constantly showed how helpful she was and how kind she wanted to be. It wasn't as much development as I would have wanted, but it was better than what happened with Toko. There was no character assassination like Toko.

I find it so funny that I fell for the "simp" characters, and for these two games it was before I found out they were the simp characters. For Toko, it was because she was "the weird girl." For Kazuichi, it started off being because of her appearance, and continued as we learned that she was smart (a mechanic!) and helpful (she gave a thumbs up!). Yes, that is actually what made me first fall for her. You can laugh. As soon as she gave a thumbs up I knew I could trust her. Yes, I am aware that that reason is absolutely bonkers, I dont care. I'm so happy I was right this time.

^^^Look at this kind, helpful soul! I love you!!!

^^Check out the family resemblance. This is her cousin, my cousin-in-law Kaito. Kazuichi and Kaito being cousins is my headcanon. I headcanon Kaito as the older cousin, even though that probably makes no sense timeline wise. Heck, none of DR V3 makes sense timeline wise, so I do whatever!

Also, the pattern continues, as I admit I have a crush on Tenko as well. It's not as big as my crush on Kazuichi, it sort of comes and goes for the time being, and if I ever selfship with her I want to get a better sense of her character before I write her into the relationship (I'd like her to be with me and Kaz, also I'm not sure if Chihiro being part of the ship is still in my canon or not), but I wanted to mention it at some point and it's relevant to this post. Tenko had great potential, and she got some development she deserved, though the death she absolutely did not.

I guess the moral of this story is that you can trust again. Sometimes that trust will be broken, but sometimes it will help you find love. You have to take that chance.

All the places I could have learned this moral and it was the Danganronpa series. Wild.

[neon-pink-leitner]

You're the resident Johnnyologist so I'm seeking at your expertise. I'm soooo confused on how V's supposed to feel/see Johnny. Is it like Ryuk from Death Note, where they can easily visualize him anywhere around him but he can't physically do anything to other people? Or is he some kind of ghost that can possess V? He can hurt V by hitting them against glass, but he can't stop them from falling over or from getting robbed during that one braindance mission...

A few things before I answer this. Being called the resident "Johnnyologist" made me extremely happy so thank you so much.

Second, I've never seen Death Note but I know roughly what you mean by that. I know, I know, I would love it, its on my list.

I honestly can't remember if they really explain this fully in canon so if this sounds wrong or off that's why. My theory is V being able to see Johnny is a form of psychosis. The Relic is writing V's brain and just wrecking havoc on their mental state even if V doesn't openly show it. We know from both the game and the anime that too much cyberwear will make you go fucking crazy. However we've also seen that the Relic isn't going to let V just drop dead so easy. When you mind is breaking apart slowly due to it being rewritten to match another person's mind then I wouldn't be surprised that V would be seeing shit.

But that doesn't explain why Johnny was able to touch V. As far as we know he can't touch or interact with anyone other than V(minus that one weird time the little fucker pulled up a chair but I'm chalking that up to V seeing shit as well). One thing I've seen a lot fanfic writer say and use to explain why Johnny can touch V is that he isn't really touching them. Not in a sense of like what you and I can do if touch something. It's more so of V's body responding as if its being touched due to Johnny overwriting everything. V's brain sees Johnny as real. Because of this if Johnny were to bash V's head into the window or passionately kiss them V's body is going to feel it because of the process of the Relic rewriting them. In short, V is slowly going crazy and their body is responding as if Johnny is a flesh and blood person because V's brain views him as such even if V's mind doesn't.

Johnny can't pocess V in the same way a ghost can per say. With ghost possession its an outside force taking over ones body, mind etc. With Johnny he's not an outside but an inside one. However, you could call it possession and I personally wouldn't disagree with that. I don't think Johnny or V , canonly, can really control (without pills) when Johnny can take control. The times we see him take over were during really bad Relic malfunctions where the walls between them start to break down.

When it comes to the braindance thing, the BD headset was spiked and we know from one of the missions with Panam that the Relic is affected by things jolting through V's cyberwear. I think the reason Johnny didn't help V when they got spiked was because he couldn't. It probably affected him too.

I hope this all makes sense XD my husband and I have talked about this a shit load but this is the first time I've ever tried to put this into writing XD

[buckbytes]

Resource Management F*cking Sucks

You'll have to excuse the sloppy writing but you have to understand, dear reader, that this post comes from a place of deep hatred. Let me explain.

Now I play games for the same reason I believe most people do, which is to enjoy themselves; even if that involves frantically running about an abandoned insane asylum being chased by unimaginable horrors. But the one consistency that has continued to annoy the hell out of me across seemingly every genre is resource management.

Of course I understand why it's such an integral part of so many developer's game design. After all, I don't think so many horror games would be nearly as terrifying if the player was granted an unlimited number of big 'fuck-off' grenades as they liked to ward off The Big Bad, but still, so many games seem to utilise this feature wrong, or they make it a chore to maintain to the point that the player is put off by the actually fun parts of the game.

I highly doubt any player's favourite aspect of any game is the fact that they have to constantly scrounge for supplies because the only reason we do this is so that we can be adequately prepared for, y'know, the actually fun parts like shooting or breaking stuff or even just having the tools to mess with an intuitive open world (BOTW/TOTK especially).

So you can see that my absolute hatred for this topic comes from those many moments when you'll be deeply immersed in perhaps a combat scenario where you're fighting off dozens off enemies using the many weapons that the game has, up til now, freely let you experiment with, only to force you along a much more linear and dull line of just using whatever basic weapons the enemies around you drop. This is why I love Doom Eternal's balance between combat and resource management, it gives you the full ability to use whichever weapons you feel best with while also having some enemies be weaker to particular choices, and the only downside is when the carnage has to die down a little so you can chainsaw a single enemy who (for some reason) drops all the ammo you may need so that you can almost seamlessly delve back into the dopamine factory that is its combat.

Compare this to so many more games like those that lean much more into horror. For example, I recently replayed my way through Alan Wake Remastered, and although I was thoroughly engrossed in so many aspects of it, there were a couple odd moments when I realised that I simply wasn't having fun because I was seemingly forced into just running through segments of levels due to my complete lack of resources to fight back. It didn't feel like I was surviving a close call, more like I had just cheated the game. Admittedly this could be chalked up to me playing on a slightly increased difficulty level (yes that's a boast bc I'm a pro gamer), but shouldn't you always at least be able to win, instead of slowly being dragged into a losing state because you chose to use one too many of whatever feature was freely at your disposal a moment ago?

Lastly, I just want to have one final rant about cozy games, because even they can irritate me with this. They're not exactly fast-paced games which is why I tend to play them, to slow down and unwind, but I feel like that gets ruined slightly when that one thing you need is on the other side of town because 'you weren't watching your supplies', and the game punishes you with a long, snail's-pace walk across a beautifully crafted town that you can't even explore right now because the shop closes at 5. I've nothing more to add to this bit, I just wanted to talk about Stardew Valley. :)

[defiantscribe]

Feeling Lost

As the title implies, I'm feeling lost these past few days and it's culminated in me having to write because my brain is just too busy and I'm tired of depression napping.

So, Monday I decided that I didn't want to work so I took a "mental health day" and just decided to sleep in and bum around. Pretty normal for me to do about once a month, twice depending on stress levels. But it also stems from the fact that I'm not enjoying my job. Now, this doesn't mean I hate my job, but I've said it time and again and I'll say it again: I hate having to work.

Work sucks, plain, simple, to the point. I don't like the idea of having to do something for someone else to earn money to just live. I understand that's how the world works, doesn't mean I have to like it. Lately, my biggest complaint with my job is the people calling in and what I feel is them feigning ignorance when it comes to certain things with computers.

I understand there are certain things they aren't going to be well versed in, especially the more elderly people within the org, however it's when I get the 20 something's calling in and acting as if they've never touched a computer in their life and I have to walk them through simple fucking tasks on a computer or getting pushback when I'm attempting to troubleshoot. "Oh I already tried that". Oh really? You're trying it again so I KNOW you did it instead of you pretending you did it because you think you know better.

It's a constant battle with these bankers. I'm not working with the general public (thank fucking god), but it's about as bad some days. The worst is the need for audit paper trails. Anything these people need typically requires a request be filled out as a papertrail back to the need/request. I get it, I just think it's dumb when one team fucks it up and requires the user to do this when they shouldn't have had to in the first place.

So that was Monday.

Monday night we had a pretty bitchin rainstorm pass through our area. Tuesday morning, I get woken up by my son well before my usual wake up time and open my front door to see one of my fucking trees diagonally across my yard. Now, don't get me wrong, was super happy it didn't hit my house, my car or was even in the street, but I now have a very LARGE problem in my front yard.

Contact a tree removal service and spend more than I was comfortable with to have it cut into pieces and removed. Stressed the entire day about the cost of the removal, but they did a good job, gathered up all the bits and hauled it away.

Come Tuesday night, wife comes home after taking son out practice driving and says something's wrong with the car. About to have a spaz, when I ask if she had been running the AC in the car. Running the AC does have a tendency to tax the car's system and cause it to act different. She says yes, so I chalk it up to that.

Wednesday.

First day of school for my kids, so I get up extra early to get my son to school so he can catch a bus to a vocational school as those are where his morning classes are. Get in the car, turn it over, immediately see that it was NOT the AC causing the issue. Something is definitely wrong with my car. Can't really come to full stops as it feels like it's going to die. Get my son to school just fine, come back home, call up my boss and say I'm out again today as I have to get this resolved as it's the only vehicle we have and can't be without.

Spend the morning attempting to call mechanics, but after a few no answers, find a place that says I can bring it by Thursday afternoon and they'll take a look and then talk price. I say fine, but can only imagine what the price tag of this shit is going to be.

Now, I don't have much in the way of savings, but what we did have is quickly being exhausted by all of this BULLSHIT currently happening and I'm losing my fucking mind. Make my appointment, schedule with others to help get my son to school and meet me at the mechanics tomorrow so I can get a ride home, but JFC, I'm so fucking stressed out I took a fucking 5 hour depression nap today because I just could not deal with this. I'm up typing at 2:37 a.m. because I just have to get all of this out of my head, put somewhere because any time I'm looking for sympathy, no one's there and what sympathy I get has the vibe of "oh well, least it's not me, sorry it's happening to you, but not my problem" and that burns.

I just feel like life is doing it's damnedest to try fuck me over and it's getting the best of me right now. And then I'm questioning my direction in life. I'm fast approaching that midlife crisis, but I'm trying to find a way to make it far more…. productive than me getting a fancy car or some other stupid shit.

I've always said family first, work second. I'm starting to feel like I'm going to flip that here soon as my children are far more independent, they're not in sports or musical academics so much anymore and the need to have that kind of flexibility is waned. My wife drives now, so going places isn't dependent upon me, so I have far more ability to not be relied upon for certain things in life and with my son learning to drive, it's going to become even less.

It's hard for me to potentially change my pattern (I have to have some ADHD or Aspergers or something), but I feel like I may have to abandon some of my more favored habits to put change in my life that is necessary. I don't want to, but if I continue this pattern, I'm doing no favors to my family for the most part (or so I believe).

I just really needed to get all of this out as it just sits in my head, stewing like a pot of sauce that never finishes. And not really having anyone beyond my wife, who's going through the same paces, stinks, so I just put it here for anyone to read. No one will, but it helps me at least release it as if someone really wants to know, I can point them here and don't have to go into grand detail from point zero with them.

Life, please, things have been quiet and they've been good, I don't need sand in the face, it's not helping.

[satanskatse]

Tbh the actors were doing great jobs, I loved the movie for the acting. I just don't like the majority of the movie/plot. Ken, a guy who literally defines himself over his love for barbie (only the stereotypical one which.... I agree is weird but I can chalk it up to him just being so in love that he doesn't care about anyone else) and feels like he's not enough bc he can't do anything (even shown to be bad at beach) which is... His fault kinda? I kinda doubt that the possibility of being more than Ken that is in love with barbie comes only after barbie says it. If he felt like he could and should be/can do more then... Do it? Idk. He literally doesn't do anything about it until he finds out he has the power to run stuff and brainwash people to cater to his will? I wouldn't even be surprised if he manipulated/brainwashed the Ken's too bc most seemed happy with their lives. It feels like lazy characterization and story writing to me. "we need to include the patriarchy as an issue. How do we do this?" "idk, we got a Ken. Let's use him"

I'm mostly unhappy with nuance bc fans just see those dumb reviews and laugh at it instead of reading criticism that is not written by right wing misogynists and their pals. If they don't pay attention to honest feedback that criticises it they frustrate the people bc they're not listened to or even worse being made fun of and compared to those whose reviews are obviously made by right wingers etc. Maybe read the critics and rethink your opinion. I don't say they should instantly agree and abandon their own opinion but an opinion can be more nuanced than "good" or "bad". It can be "it has some issues that should have been addressed but I enjoyed the movie and think it's good" or "the movie had a good idea and good scenes but I don't like the story". But nowadays fans quickly get butthurt by criticism and quickly dump hate on those having more complex opinions so....

Also I don't get how people don't even get kinda thoughtful after the movie. I heard two guys talking about the movie instantly after it ended going "best movie of the year" and your entitled to your own opinion but also... You should maybe think a bit more about what it shows about the world. Like you may have not (directly) been exposed to the issues girls have, esp growing up, but it literally shows that the life of a woman is pretty shitty. Like a guy needs to go to a college to get a high job. Oh no, poor you. I don't say guys don't have hard lives too, far from it but the movie is about the patriarchy and it shows how a guy basically needs nothing than education to get the highest paying job. A woman needs way more to even have a chance of being a lower guys assistant. Doesn't matter that she has more knowledge than the highest guys combined, you can count yourself lucky to get a job on the lower ranks that makes you a modern slave to a man, barely get money, no perspective, and get to watch clueless guys get promoted after half a year even though you worked 20 years there and only got a 10$ raise or whatever. Even in other parts of life woman are pretty much always seen as inferior, unless it can be weaponized by men. "I'm sorry honey, you know I can't cook" "a baby needs it's momma to take care of it" "the kitchen is your kingdom, I don't even know where everything is and how stuff works" "I need so much longer to clean and don't know where to find/put everything". That's life. And whatever you do, you always do it wrong. Even women have been so brainwashed by that shit to attack other women for doing sth how they do it instead of staying together and helping. "What do you mean, you work full time? Your baby needs you!" "You are a stay at home mom even though your kid is so big already? You gotta go back to work or you'll never get a job again!" someone will always criticise you. And that's the sad truth shown in the Barbie movie. Whatever you do you can never do it right. And while I personally have the "I don't care what you think, I don't even know you. Your opinion doesn't matter to me" attitude it puts pretty much everyone down if you get critizised all day long. It's a very disheartening thing. And yet it's reality.

How can you laugh about that? I personally want to cry until I don't feel anything anymore from that. Maybe it's bc of the different problems in my life, maybe it's bc I've been having issues of depression for what feels like my whole life, maybe it's just the fact that my heart breaks ever so often again when I see all this unnecessary cruelty and hate and how willing so many people (mostly straight white men in power) are willing to fuck over poeple for no other reason than being able to do so.

Love the movie, go ahead. But I don't think I'll ever understand how people see the issues addressed in the movie shoved in their face with the notion of "hahaha it's never gonna change, deal with it" and just... apparently laugh it off and say it's not that deep/not the message of the movie/whatever.

Also, about the shoes... In the end it's shown barbie wears the "ugly reality sandals" from the beginning but in beautiful barbie pink. The ending of the movie kinda says "take the suffering under the patriarchy and make it beautiful, make it yours" imo. Like change it maybe? And reflect it in the end by barbie wearing boots or ballerinas or whatever else? Would have been a better end imho.

I mean saying the movie supported men's rights kind of ignores that what the kens did was painted as bad. Like that was very much the message of the film

That was the text of the film but not the message.

I'm not going to apply greater nuanced analysis to a movie that had all coherent structure papered over in producer notes. But for a movie that spends a lot of time pointing out situations that are unfair, not equal, or "bad" it didn't have anything to say about why or what might actually resolve the inequality.

Not saying it needs to author the revolution or anything, just it kinda stopped at "patriarchy bad because men rule all and are dumb boys who are gross" and I think that's boring? It's like hey, inequality sure is bad! And it seems like weird and wrong the girl empowerment doll for diverse women is exclusively developed by old white men! Followed by crickets chirping.

I was kinda waiting for the other shoe to drop, like yes, this is a pretty fun satirical look at gender and... and..? And that's it. Barbie world goes back to hierarchical control in a perfect utopia. The real world is unaffected because all those executives are just silly guys who are trying their best. Gloria gets to be a good mom, and hands her ideas over to the corporation. The new line of Barbies are Barbies that just don't want anything at all. And Margot Barbie just leaves.

Which is unfortunate because it starts out with a great deal of very interesting ideas, but ends up without anything much to say at all. It uses all the right words but mostly just kinda ascribes broad universal meaning and morality rather than considering any of it could have some underlying complexity.

We all know feminism can't hold hands with capitalism, but the Barbie movie wants the cache of the feminist movement beholden to the bottom line of Mattel's investors. And as a fun movie about children's dolls it's fine, but it's also selling itself as a feminist film, which it very much is not.

[w4yf1nder]

Icy cold take here (actually I dunno) but a lot of Indian movies are q bad cause they are either “oo look at this couple and how they fall in love” or “oo look at MC, isn’t he the coolest?” And honestly I like movies that aren’t necessarily focused on the romance at all, but aren’t just “the trials and tribulations of this one guy”

call me picky but IDK

~ chalky the chalk anon

chalk anon, CHALK ANON *SHAKES YOU* i wrote an entire essay about this because I was so frustrated about bollywood movies LMAO but yes i didn't mean for it to get this long 💔 more utc 😔💔💔

no because you're so right 😔💔 i get that too! i wish there were more movies about female characters that weren't ott-exclusive/direct to streaming services yk? and even the mainstream female-oriented movies that we already have are marketed as such (which causes the general public to lose interest in it because "it's about women and feminism is cancer *goes to the movies to watch the most generic action-thriller starring salman khan and an actress 20 years his junior for the third time this week*)

but that isn't even my only grudge actually?? bollywood movies are primarily romance movies but even then— EVEN THEN!! i don't think I can name a single movie that made me swoon or made me feel giggly and happy on the inside 💔 i have never "shipped" an on-screen couple in a bollywood movie etc. because the movies just?? aren't good. i don't like the way it portrays romance as physical attraction (especially on the male characters part) and shows him needlessly objectifying women. it's sad, it's tired, it's exploitative, it's male-gazey, it's everything that is wrong with this world 💞 /gen now i'm not gonna sit here and tell you what a good romance movie makes (because I... Have never made one lmao) but on behalf of the girls and the gays, i would like to outline some obvious pet peeves that i have from MOST movies (I swear you'll find these tropes in like every movie you don't even have to try) let's go.

item numbers. we don't need them. take them out. please 💞

actors not knowing how to act??? i think this is just an industry problem tbh

not knowing how to write women

not knowing how to choreograph good fight sequences

filler songs for radio promotion

ARIJIT SINGH IS EVERYWHERE???

not knowing how to write romance

thinking every movie NEEDS romance in the first place

and that last point is so important to me btw. i just wish we had more movies trying to tell STORIES rather than LOVE stories, like yeah an occasional rom-com is fun and i'm not saying we should give it up completely but it gets tiring when literally every movie is a rom-com. action-rom-com? drama-rom-com????? yes we've got it 😔💔 it's v funny becajse most of my (and most people ik!!!!) favorite movies weren't romance at all 😧 spirited away is the best movie ever made (#hakukisser4lyf) because it had a compelling story set in a beautiful world with fun characters.

it's honestly just pretty clear to me atp is that bollywood just doesn't care about giving us good stories. your best bet is south indian movies and indie stuff.

so yeah anyways i don't watch Bollywood anymore.

[ridiasfangirlings]

1) Fushimi gives Yata a candle. I was surprised, because he doesn't like candles that much, so he said thank you and put the candle on the shelf. This gesture upset Saru for some reason, but he did not say why. Fushimi spent the next week in Scepter 4 because they had a lot to do, although Yata felt that Fushimi was avoiding him for some reason. But I didn't think it was the candle. A week later, Yata saw a candle of the same company at one of the guys in Homra and said that he had the same one.

I feel like Fushimi gets talked into this by the alphabet boys somehow, like he can't vocalize his feelings well so someone suggests he try the candle route. Like say post-ROK Fushimi's obviously starting to accept the fact that he has a crush on Misaki but he also doesn't know how to deal with it, he's not good at putting his emotions into words and besides he can't quite convince himself that Yata would feel the same way and accept Fushimi's feelings after all Fushimi's done to him. At the same time though they've been getting closer since they reconciled and they're always going out on drinking dates and such and it's becoming harder and harder for Fushimi to bury his feelings. This has been putting him in an increasingly bad mood, snapping at the squad even more than usual because he's so preoccupied by all these annoying feelings. Eventually the squad manage to get him to admit it, like Akiyama notices Fushimi being more on edge than usual whenever Yata's mentioned and asks if something happened and Fushimi unintentionally blurts out that he can't find a way to tell Misaki that he loves him. The squad immediately descend on him like a bunch of gossipy old ladies, so excited that Fushimi-san is finally ready to admit his feelings. Fushimi waves them away angrily and mutters that it doesn't matter anyway, even if he tried to say it he would just ruin it. That's when Enomoto mentions the candles, he heard some of the ladies talking about how you can put a message in these special candles that will show up when the candle is lit. If Fushimi can't say the words maybe he can write them, and by giving Yata the candle Fushimi won't have to like stand there face to face while Yata reads it so there's no worry that he'll try to suddenly take the words back or anything.

Fushimi thinks this is a stupid idea but he ends up ordering the candle anyway, feeling like an idiot but at the same time wondering if this might actually work. It takes him a few tries to get himself to give the candle to Yata but finally one day after they've gone out drinking before the part ways to go back home Fushimi hands Yata the candle all 'here, this is for you.' Yata's kinda confused but also maybe a little pleased, because Saruhiko isn't the type to give gifts and isn't this a good sign, that Fushimi's giving him something. A candle is kinda weird as a gift but Yata chalks that up to Fushimi just being awkward, like well maybe Saruhiko couldn't decide what to get me and aren't candles supposed to be good gifts for like coworkers you don't know well and stuff (this suddenly makes him worried though, like but we're closer than that now aren't we). Yata doesn't really use candles but he's definitely not throwing Saruhiko's gift away so he just sticks it on a shelf and mostly forgets about it.

The next time he meets Fushimi for drinks Yata thinks that Fushimi seems weirdly nervous, like he keeps shooting Yata these little glances when he thinks Yata isn't looking. Yata asks if anything's wrong and Fushimi looks away and clicks his tongue as he says 'no,' there's something weird in his tone though. After that Yata notices that Fushimi starts avoiding him a little more, canceling when they were supposed to go out together and not really looking at him when S4 and Homra run into each other on patrol. Yata's confused and kinda upset, he thought things were really going well but now it feels like there's a wall between them again. He doesn't even really think much about the candle – or if he does maybe he starts to worry that it was like a 'coworker you don't know well' gift, like Fushimi's way of telling Yata they're not that close and he needs to back off.

Yata's feeling really bummed about all this when he stops in the bar, depressed and frustrated that things seemed to be going so well with Fushimi and now they're back to Fushimi not telling him anything. That's when he sees all the Homra guys gathering around Chitose, Yata goes over and sees Chitose has a candle with him that looks like the one Yata got from Fushimi. Yata's all what's with the candles all of a sudden and someone asks him what he means, Yata says Saru gave him one too. Chitose asks what Yata's candle said and Yata's like 'said? It doesn't talk.' Chitose explains he got this one from his current girlfriend, if you light the candle there's a message. The candles have basic messages but you can get special customized ones too, everyone starts joking about what kind of message Fushimi would give to Yata while Yata's just slowly realizing what just happened.

He leaves the bar in a hurry and rushes home, all flustered trying to find where he put the stupid candle. Finally he finds it and starts to light it, heart pounding, maybe worried that Fushimi put some kind of 'let's not see each other anymore' message in there. The candle starts to burn and finally the message shows up: 'I love you. Can we be together?'. Yata's face gets all red and he finds himself feeling almost giddy, like here he was worried that Fushimi hated him and instead Fushimi just confessed. Yata finds himself running right to S4, imagine Fushimi's working and Yata just busts into the office. Fushimi looks up and starts to say something cold to him but Yata just storms up to him and grabs him, pulling him close. Fushimi squirms like what the hell Misaki and Yata's like don't what the hell me you idiot, you're the one who didn't tell me to light the candle. Fushimi freezes and Yata's like yeah I finally got it, and anyway the answer is yes.

[alstroemeriadissonance]

(1/3) I've read your recent Q&A post and would like to reassure you, that your vynrosa fics are awesome. Seeing more vynmarius requests I start thinking maybe it's because people just don't get used to the concept of actual love in fanfics. Most fanfics are still about either the process of falling in love, admitting and then confessing one's feelings to other person, or passion and sexual desire. And I'm not implying that both topics are bad at all! XD

*cue longwinded answer to this lol*

Thank you very much for this! Receiving something this well-thought out in my inbox really made my day (or week).

I mostly chalked up the uptick of vynmarius fic asks due to a relative lack of it at least in Tumblr (AO3 had quite a few).

Though, yeah, in Tumblr there is indeed the prevalent preference for the down and dirty (I do too, sometimes. Ahahahaah) and on the other side of the scale, the short fics/HCs that capture those sweet stages of falling in love. However I would attribute it more to the design (or limitation) of Tumblr; I've seen some great vynrosa fics in AO3 for instance.

Just to clarify--my main stuff will still be vynrosa! I'm just really fascinated with vynmarius because I have a thing for the (forbidden) teacher-student interaction and also, I like Vyn's and Marius's dynamic in game.

My vynmarius stuff also lets me write a different type of Vyn; the Vyn in vynrosa pieces is closest to the one we mostly see in game: elegant, amiable, caring, aggressive. On the flipside the Vyn in vynmarius pieces is more subdued, withdrawn, walled off--a literal object for the young, impulsive Marius to try to grab for himself and obtain. Playing with both Vyns just tickles my fancy.

And oh, the unhinge.

I'm really glad you like my stuff and that you notice my predilection for development especially for the vynrosa stuff. I just happen to get my jollies from writing the path from Point A to B so my stuff tends to be longwinded--I guess you could imagine how happy I am that there's at least one person who doesn't think I take too long or tend to meander about lol ^^;

Tears of Themis was my first otoge; prior to me testing this game blindly (I installed this game more for the Ace Attorney gameplay than the romance--I initially HATED the romance bit!) I wasn't really into otoge especially since the ones I've seen tended to have a wide roster of males, each of whom who cater to a specific trope. Not really my thing.

I remember going through the Visit interactions feeling really awkward (oh god do I really have to poke this dude? *poke poke* )

Eventually as the game progressed I was happy to be finally proven wrong: each Tears of Themis LI were deliciously layered and well written! Especially Vyn, oh my god Vyn. Nothing like a morally grey character to jumpstart my day.

As for your thoughts on Vyn's medieval aggressive flirting, YES he may totally do that--or he can take the unhinged route and sabotages the tournament in a most spectacular fashion so he and Rosa can ride off into the sunset.

Anyways thanks again for dropping this in my box ;__;

[bi-disaster-yn]

Glad to hear I can message you to talk about Bucky. I always want to talk about him, but I feel like I'm alone on thinking he deserves better even after TFATWS. So I just keep to myself in regards to my thoughts on it. I think I just need to find the right writers I guess. I know I won't like EVERYTHING that someone writes and that's okay. But finding that perfect balance I guess would be cool. I think I've found a few writers I just need to sit down and binge their masterlists, yours included. I think one problem is the things I like to read. It's easy to find fluff for certain things and not for others.

I feel like we did get some bits and pieces of Bucky in TFATWS with his whole humor and not being able to lie to save his life. Steve Rogers can't lie either so that was a nice touch to add in there. But you really had to look past the whole brooding and staring narrative to really see who he is at times. I was so tired of everyone talking about him "staring" all the time and being grumpy. And don't get me started on the therapy sessions and the whole "doing the work" to make amends for something the Winter Soldier did, not him. If it was something he wanted to do to deal with what the WS did then okay, but to me the show really enforced that he was the one who did it as if he was in control as the WS the whole time. And that it was part of his parole/therapy to prove to the world that he was in control. I do think the episode on the boat brought more of Bucky's personality out. That was probably my favorite episode. But I do feel like Bucky's whole ending with Yori was rushed. They built it up nicely, but the payoff was eh. It was like they either just ran out of time or that was how they wanted to do it. And it left me with more questions then answers.

I love when I can feel that a writer loves the person they are writing about. It's something I'm not used to seeing, but I do when it comes to Bucky. And it warms my heart to see it. I love it. My old fandom would write fanfics for my favorite character, but he was always screwed over at any chance they could by people claiming to love him. And even by those that just didn't like him but still wrote about him. And he was a good guy who had a lot of bad things happen to him. They just didn't want him to have a happy ending I guess. And when he did it was always just smut so there was that. I was so scared to read anything Bucky because I figured if it was like that in the other fandom then it would be for him as well. I just chalked it up as just my luck for choosing to like that character, and just stayed away from fanfics of him. But I'm so glad it's not like that with Bucky. I'm so glad people love Bucky the way they do. I still worry about finding those type of fanfics here, but not so much as my old fandom. I'm looking forward to what you write, and I'm going to read what you've already written as well. And if you ever want to recommend some writers that write Bucky fluff or angst with a happy ending feel free to. I'll be happy to check them out. I'm sure I'm missing on a lot of good fanfics. That's not to say the rest are bad. Just not for me. And that's okay. And I feel so bad for the long reply. I blame it on my inability to make my messages short.

Hi sorry! I wanted to give this the proper response it deserves but have been so busy with work/other things that I haven’t had time.

Honestly, I have NEVER thought about the fact they made him make amends for WS actions until now. When he literally had to go to Wakanda to have all that stuff removed from his brain and then they just turned round and said: say sorry. I’m actually angry thinking about it now!! I think he was short changed a little in FATWS. Don’t get me wrong, I love the show. I’ve rewatched it countless times and I love love love Sam being our new cap and I am so excited to see what they do with him. I think this meant that there is more room for Bucky to grow (and Sebastian deffo thinks this too based on interviews). I hope Marvel do keep bringing him back and doing more with him and letting him evolve.

We are all majorly soft for Bucky here! Bucky, Kate, Wade Wilson and Peter 1 are my ultimate comfort characters. But there’s something about Bucky that is so special and I relate to so much that my emotions for him genuinely feel real? Idk, I can’t describe it. I try to pour that out when I write for him so hope that comes across.

[hermannsthumb]

I know you don't usually write PRU stuff, but if you ever feel inclined, here's a ficlet idea! so: Newt is trying to fight off the Precursors by constantly reminding himself that He Is Human. but whenever newt thinks about what makes him Feel Human, the answer is always hermann. so newt starts conjuring up vivid mental images of hermann (doing mundane, hermann-y things) to ward off the Precursors. bonus point if, like, newt fondly remembering smth innocuous (like the scent of Hermann's chalk dust?) is enough to actually sever the alien mind control.

Anonymous asked: Maria!!! Would you ever write an angsty post uprising prompt? Or even a pre uprising? Anything with Newt fucking around with Kaiju and being sad i am HERE FOR 👏

in honor of the sequel’s 3 year anniversary, let’s try something a little different 👀 THIS ONE GOT AWAY FROM ME RE: LENGTH....I'll leave it up to interpretation whether or not the bonus is wholly fulfilled.... also on proofing this I realized it might need content warnings? so vague refs to disordered eating and alcohol drinking (ie, newt’s body is inhabited by aliens who forget how human stuff works)

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Honestly, Newt’s life has been kind of a shitshow lately. He’s too, like, high strung. Too many responsibilities. Not enough hours in the day to get that shit done. He’s even higher strung than he was during the war, which is nuts, because certain doom was lurking around every corner. Maybe that’s why it’s not that nuts, though. The war was chaotic—and Newt’s fueled (or, used to be fueled?) by chaos. The kaiju were unpredictable. The kaiju didn’t run on a 9-5 schedule. The kaiju didn’t expect Newt to have three new jaeger prototypes on their desk by noon on a fucking Saturday, which is usually the day Newt spends two hours in his expensive bath tub and drinks a nice bottle of wine, and definitely not a day he wants to spend giving himself a stress migraine and shouting at underlings to make themselves useful. On top of that, his usual cafe got his coffee order wrong—when Newt had to run in to get it, himself, on a Saturday morning—and it only had half the espresso shots he really needs for the day. No wonder he’s going grey at forty. Fucking nightmare. Stable employment is exactly the kind of chaos that’s bad for Newt—give him the kaiju any day, thanks.

“Dr. Geiszler?”

Newt pushes his sunglasses up, and scowls at whichever one of his employees has dared to interrupt his catnap. The fluorescent overheads are brutal on his poor eyes right now. The lab needs more natural lighting. Maybe if he complains, they’ll knock out some walls in put in a few more windows. “Did you find any Aspirin?” he says.

Wordlessly, Newt’s assistant passes him a bottle. Newt pops the cap off and takes at least four. The coffee he washes it down with is cold. “How are the last simulations coming along?” he says, flicking his sunglasses back down. He seems to have so many migraines these days. It’s the contact lenses, he thinks—making the switch over from frames so late in the game. Screwing with his perceptions. Newt went thirty years with frames, after all. “We only have two hours before—”

“We’re almost done,” his assistant cuts in. “We’re working as fast as we can, Dr. Geiszler.”

“But are we gonna make the deadline?” Newt says.

She fidgets, and moves her clipboard to her other arm. “Well—we’ve had some—issues.”

Newt stands up with a long sigh. Double overtime, probably. Sunday lost to this shit too. That new bottle of wine waiting for him on his kitchen counter bought for nothing. “Gotta do everything myself, huh? Unbelievable.”

He follows his assistant over to the main lab down the hall, where his team of j-techs are hurrying around. Hardly anyone in proper lab attire—no labcoats—someone in sweatpants—Newt wasn’t the only one who had his Saturday ruined, probably. No one else is going grey, though. “What’s this shit?” he says, stopping in his tracks with one foot through the doorway. The high-tech holo-smartboards have been pushed aside, and instead, someone’s wheeled in a huge…chalkboard.

“Technical issues,” his assistant says. “The other floors are having the same problem—something in the new interface update that downloaded last night, we think. They’re all out of commission. Technology is working on it, but for now, we had to pull that out of deep storage.”

Two of his scientists are scrawling across the board quickly—one with white chalk, the other with pink. They’re debating something in hushed tones. Newt hasn’t seen a chalkboard in years. It doesn’t fit with Shao Industry’s whole chic, sleek, futuristic aesthetic. So—bulky. And messy. “Of course it would happen today of all days,” Newt sighs. The sight of it makes him feel odd, and he can’t seem to drag himself any further into the lab and any closer towards it.

His assistant says something. Newt doesn’t hear—he’s listening, instead, to the squeaking of chalk across the blackboard. So noisy and obnoxious. It reminds him of years and years ago, of working in a grimy little basement, of…

“—look it over. Dr. Geiszler?”

“Hm?” Newt says. It was like a layer of fog had begun to lift from his thoughts, but the interruption sends it rolling right back in.

“I said we’re ready for you to look it over. Only if you want too, of course,” she adds, nervously.

“Uh-huh,” Newt says.

Newt’s never had anyone fear him before, not like his employees seem to fear him—he’s not sure he likes it. His scientists shut up the second he looms over (well—under, Newt’s never loomed over anyone in his life) their shoulders to inspect their work so far. The squeaking stops. One of them lowers their piece of chalk. “Wait,” Newt says, too-loudly, surprising them and himself. They both look at him with the same nervousness as his assistant, like he’s about to start shouting or something. “Keep doing that.”

“Keep…?”

“Writing,” Newt says. “On the chalkboard.”

The scientist frowns at him. “Um, okay,” she says. “What am I supposed to write?”

“Anything,” Newt says. “Seriously. Anything.”

She hesitates.

“Anything,” Newt repeats.

She picks up the white chalk, and writes out her name, then doodles a few random pictures—a DNA helix, a flower, a cat face, a star. Newt shuts his eyes, and breathes in deeply. That smell. He snags the forgotten piece of pink chalk from the ledge. “Can I have this?” he says. He doesn’t wait for them to respond—though they both nod yes frantically, and bewilderedly—before writing out his own name on the board. Dr. Geiszler. It looks wrong, so he writes Newt beneath it. He shuts his eyes, and writes Newt again. Why does he feel like he’s done this sort of thing before? This thing is ancient—before his time at Shao—he wouldn’t have used it before they carted off to the basement. Newt, Newt, Newt Was Here,he writes, Newt +, and then he stops.

He opens his eyes. “Who’s Hermann?” his assistant says.

Newt + Hermann. Newt didn’t realize he wrote it. “Someone I knew,” he says, faintly. “Years ago. He was my—” He swallows. He feels strange. “My colleague?”

Strange. Dizzy. The Aspirin isn’t working. Definitely the contact lenses. He could afford laser eye surgery now, if he wanted, maybe he should look into it. He grips the ledge of the chalkboard, swaying, and grits his teeth; his two scientists back away from him slowly, no doubt worried he’s about to hurl all over their shoes. He might, to be honest. Newt + Hermann. Hermann was his colleague. Hermann was his— “Are you feeling okay, Dr. Geiszler?” his assistant asks. “You look…”

“Tell Shao I’m taking the rest of the day off,” Newt says.

“What?”

“You guys got this shit handled without me,” Newt says. He pockets the chalk. “I’m not—I’m not feeling myself. I think I need to go home and lie down. Seriously, you’ve got it under control—all these numbers look, uh, good, I trust you. If you guys don’t get it finished you can just tell Shao it’s my fault, okay?”

She gapes at him. “Uh,” she says. “Okay?”

Newt doesn’t go home. He goes to the nearest shop he can find instead, and makes a beeline for the art supplies aisle. Only a few boxes of chalk in stock. Four multicolored, two all-white, one yellow. He drops them all into his basket but the yellow, which he rips opens and immediately smells. Newt + Hermann. Hermann always smelled like chalk dust—he always had a fine layer of it on his clothing, patches of it on his blazer, his sweatervest, even on his undershirt. Newt used to tease him for that. He closes his eyes, and breathes in again. Funny—all those baths, all those bottles of wine, and this stupid little box of chalk is what’s finally making him feel calm for once. Quieting down his brain. He didn’t realize how loud it’d gotten in there. When Hermann would kiss Newt, he would sometimes stain Newt’s clothing with chalk, too, and Newt would pretend to be annoyed, but he never really was.

Someone is speaking to him. An employee. They’re staring at him, a cautious distance away, and Newt’s not sure what they’re saying.

His vision’s gone blurry—he didn’t realize he’d started crying, either. He wipes his eyes on the cuff of his blazer and sniffles. “Sorry,” he says. The box of yellow chalk is wet. “Um. Do you have any more of these in the back?”

He takes the bus home for the first time in years, one hand stuffed in his little brown shopping bag the whole time, wrapped around a box of chalk. When he gets back to his apartment (his big, lonely, apartment), he pulls out the only food in his fridge—some leftovers from a Shao Industries event three nights ago—and settles down on his big, lonely couch. He can’t stop thinking about Hermann. Five or so years, maybe more, not thinking about Hermann, and now suddenly—it’s like the floodgates have opened. He thinks about Hermann’s haircut. (Bad.) He thinks about Hermann’s smile. (Silly, and sweet.) He thinks about Hermann’s dumb accent, and the clack of Hermann’s cane on the floor, and Hermann’s chalk squeaking over his chalkboard, and how it felt when Hermann would wrap him in his arms and kiss him and whisper things to him. Hermann’s sweaters always smelled like mothballs and stale cigarette smoke. Terrible combination.

Newt’s stomach growls. He’s finished the small bit of leftovers without realizing, and is apparently still hungry. He would kill for some sushi takeout right now. Or pizza, God. Yeah, it’d be screwing with his new diet and fitness plan—he casts a guilty glance over at his brand new exercise bike, which is gathering dust in the corner by his TV—but he’s tired of doing stupid kale and juice cleanses or whatever, just to please—well. He’s only human.

He is?

He walks up the stairs to his bathroom, and stares at himself in the mirror. Stupid vest. Stupid tie. Neat hair, clean-shaven cheeks, contact lenses. Newt’s only human. “I’m human,” he tells his reflection. Is he human? He felt human standing by that old chalkboard back in the lab, and holding that box of yellow chalk in the aisle of that little shop. He felt human when he was remembering things. Because of—Newt blinks at himself. Because of whom?

“Hermann,” he says, and smiles at the way the name makes him feel. He should text him, maybe.

-------------

“I must say,” Hermann says, “I was quite surprised when I received your dinner invitation. You’ve done a rather fine job of ignoring my calls as of late. I’d thought— Ah, thank you,” he adds, as Newt holds the door open for him. He steps into Newt’s apartment and cranes his neck around, squinting curiously, and then shoves a bottle of red wine at Newt’s chest. Hermann is much more personable than Newt remembers—what little Newt remembers—and he wonders if it’s age or something else. “I’ve been holding onto this one for a while. It’s the one you gave me as a part of a gift for my thirty-seventh birthday—you remember? Oh, but isn’t it so terrifically, er, modern in here.”

“Is it?” Newt says. He’s never given much thought to his apartment before, but he stares around at it now in mild interest. It is very chic, isn’t it? Monochrome. Impersonal. Not something Newt would’ve picked for himself. “Yeah, I had some interior decorators come in and do it for me.”

Hermann arches an eyebrow. “How…”

“Modern,” Newt offers. He puts the bottle of wine on his marble kitchen island. “Thanks for this, by the way, but I’ve actually been trying to cut back on the—” He bites back drinking. No need to alarm Hermann. “—Calories, so if it’s cool with you I’d rather not open it. I’m doing a, um, a new fitness program.”

“Ah,” Hermann says. “I suppose that explains that, then, doesn’t it?” He points at the dusty exercise bike. Newt watches his gaze move from that, to the barren leather couch, to the short staircase which leads to Newt’s shut bedroom door. Newt can practically see the gears working in his head. “Will—ah, what was their name, that little flight of fancy of yours—a dalliance, one might say—will they be, ah, joining the two of us?” He looks at Newt out of the corner of his eye. “Alice, was it?”

“Who?” Newt says, blankly.

Hermann breaks out in a broad grin, which he quickly tries, very badly, to turn into a sympathetic frown. He pats Newt’s arm. “There’s the spirit, then, Newton! All in the past, I presume? Hardly any use in dwelling on a broken heart. Then again—it’s not as if you were together long enough to warrant those sorts of dramatics, were you?” he says, cheerily. “What I mean is—certainly it wasn’t as if you had any sort of deep or emotional connection with—?—oh, I’ve forgotten the name again.”

“Uh,” Newt says. He’s not really sure who Hermann’s talking about, but just based on that fact alone, he would assume Hermann is right. “I guess not?”

“Precisely as I expected,” Hermann says, with a satisfied nod. “Rotten grounds for a relati—for a fling. You deserve far better, Newton.” Hermann touches Newt’s arm again, and this time, he doesn’t move his hand. It makes Newt’s skin prickle pleasantly. “You look well these days, though I admit it’s a bit of a shock to see you without your glasses,” Hermann continues, flicking his eyes up and down Newt twice. He lingers on Newt’s left hand, over the bare spot where—until this morning, when he suddenly realized how stupid it looked and yanked it off—he was wearing that Elvis ring. “Ending things must be treating you kindly. I don’t suppose I could dash to your loo?”

“Loo?” Newt says. “Oh, right. Yeah, it’s that door there, right off the living room.” He drops down onto the leather couch. “Knock yourself out. I’ll be right here.”

Hermann disappears into Newt’s bathroom, and comes back out three minutes later with combed hair, a straightened collar, and the vague smell of cologne. He’s tucking a small bottle into his top pocket. “I found a box of hair dye in your medicine cabinet,” he declares, smugly. “I knew there was no bloody way that was natural. Though I’m not surprised it fooled Alice.” He rests his cane against the glass coffee table and sits down next to Newt. Right next to Newt. The whole sofa to pick from, and he’d rather their thighs touch. Newt doesn’t mind—actually, the contact is strangely grounding, like Hermann’s hand on his arm had been earlier. He’s here, in his living room, with Hermann, his friend Hermann, his colleague Hermann, his—well, question mark—Hermann.

“Hermann, can I ask you something?” he says. “Something important?”

“By all means,” Hermann says, leaning in and fluttering his eyelashes. Even over the cologne, Newt can still make out that mothball-chalk-smoke smell.

“Do you take your coffee with sugar?�� he says.

Hermann laughs. “Do I—what?”

Newt repeats the question. The smile slips off Hermann’s face, and he draws away, furrowing his eyebrows. “Well,” he says, “yes, usually, only I’m not sure what—”

“Sugar, and some milk,” Newt says. “It was the same with your tea. And you had a mug that you would use—you wouldn’t use any other. It was blue, and it said—” He exhales through his nose. “It said TU Berlin. That’s where you got your PhD.”

After Newt sent Hermann a text about dinner last night, he sat down with a pen and pad of paper and made a list of everything he could remember about Hermann. He started with what Hermann looks like, and who Hermann is, and then moved into the harder stuff like what Hermann likes and the sort of things Hermann used to do. He stayed up all night doing it, until his hand cramped and his head hurt even more than it had that morning, and then recited it over and over to himself in a whisper as he fell asleep. Hermann has brown eyes. Hermann likes blackberry jam on his toast. Hermann wears little glasses on a chain. Hermann uses a cane with a tiny little nick in the brass of the handle. The list is in his pocket now; it makes Newt feel calm, and even calmer when he reaches into his pocket and touches it. He exhales again, hard, and then inhales. “We were together,” he says. “When we closed the Breach, you told me you loved me.”

“I did,” Hermann says, quietly.

“I said it back,” Newt says.

Hermann nods.

Slowly, Newt reaches out and puts his hand over Hermann’s. Hermann makes a strange noise in the back of his throat—like a sigh, or maybe a groan. His pulse twitches erratically under Newt’s fingertips. “I bought chalk,” Newt says.

“You—” Hermann echoes, his voice choked. “You bought chalk?”

“It reminded me of you,” Newt says.

He’s not surprised when Hermann kisses him, but he is surprised at his knee-jerk reaction: to pull away, or push Hermann away, and to order him to get out of his apartment. He’s surprised, because those aren’t his thoughts. He doesn’t want Hermann to leave—he wants Hermann to stay longer, and kiss him more, and help him remember more. “Oh, Newton,” Hermann says. “Newton, Newton—” He moves his mouth to Newt’s neck, kissing, breathing, and whispering his name, and Newt shuts his eyes and forces himself to remember his list.

“Tell me things about you,” Newt begs. “I want to remember you.”

Hermann’s laughter, hesitant and confused, comes out in a puff of hot air against his skin. “Remember me?” he says. “I’m not sure— Are we not a bit—?”

“Hermann,” Newt says.

He grips the back of Hermann’s sweater, digging his nails in Hermann’s skin through the layers of fabric. Hermann must hear the urgency in his voice, because he shakes his head with another laugh, kisses Newt’s jaw, and says, “Well, alright. What am I even meant to tell you?”

“Your favorite color,” Newt says. Hermann kisses his chin. “Your favorite song. No, wait—” He nudges Hermann away from him, just enough so that Hermann can see him smile. “Tell me what you like about me.”

“Feeling rather egotistical tonight, aren’t we?” Hermann teases. He reaches out and brushes his fingers through the side of Newt’s hair. One of the spots Newt dyed—it was too grey. He catches Hermann’s hand by the wrist and pulls it away gently, but only to press himself up against Hermann’s chest instead. He can feel Hermann’s heartbeat. “I like—hm,” Hermann says. “I like your stubbornness. I like your passion. I like…”

His voice vibrates in his throat—Newt can feel that, too. He listens.

[naritaren]

Hello, I am not sure if you write off kayface . But I wished you will write about Kenny's reaction watching kota vs Okada match where the golden star got injured . And only being able to talk through phone and nothing else due to travel restrictions .

Recently the travel restrictions are no more . So you can give them happy ending . If you feel uncomfortable or don't have time them ignore this . Thank you ☺️

Ok this is just a little blurb but I'm tempted to add on it later so count this as a little sneak peek! It's basically a comfort thing with a cliffhanger. No smut or anything. Under the cut as always!

Kenny closed out of the tab that had the video. He felt sick to his stomach, unable to watch Kota writhe in pain any longer. He knew that in professional wrestling there was always a chance for injury. Hell, he was currently injured and just waiting out the storyline so that he could drop the belt and focus on recovery.

But this time felt different. Kenny couldn’t be there to comfort Kota and he didn’t know when he’d be able to get in touch with him. He had to stay stateside to focus on AEW and himself. It hurt him to be so far from Kota and with the borders being closed, he couldn’t even go home.

Kenny grabbed his phone and sent Kota a message.

>Call me when you can. I’m worried.

Kenny put his phone down after checking to make sure the ringer was turned on. He started to pace around the apartment, not sure what to do to take his mind off things. He had watched Kota do the move millions of times and of course this would be the one time he’d get injured doing it.

Kenny checked his phone again, finding no messages or response. He sent off a message to the Bucks, hoping that they’d be awake still. He had no luck and chalked it up to the fact it was 3 in the morning.

Kenny picked up his Switch and started to play Mario Kart, trying to distract as much as possible. He got a few races in and then he heard his phone ringing.

“I saw what happened. Do they know what is wrong?” Kenny’s Japanese wasn’t the smoothest as he was on the verge of tears.

“I dislocated my shoulder.” Kota sounded defeated.

Kenny turned his video on, hoping Kota would get the hint.

“Is there anything I can do? Is someone there to help you? I don’t want you to be trying to do things by yourself.” Kenny’s words tumbled out, the panic and worry really starting to settle in.

“Someone is helping me.” Kota flipped his camera on and he tilted it to show a guy that Kenny didn’t recognize helping get Kota settled in. A sling was holding his arm in place and he looked completely wiped out.

“Good. When the borders open, I’m flying there to take care of you.”

Kota laughed at that. It was always Kenny who was worried and overprotective.

“It’s only two months.” Kota had a small smile on his face. Kenny felt the love radiate through the video call.

“Ok, then I’ll be there in a month.” Kenny made a mental note to check out flights. He had a Japanese passport so he was pretty certain he’d be allowed in to go home.

“You don’t have to…” Kota’s voice trailed off and he started to sound sleepy.

“I want to.” Kenny smiled and blew a kiss through the phone. Kota grinned and attempted to send one back with his bad arm. He grimaced and scrunched his face up.

“Ok, don’t do that. Why don’t you get some sleep and call me when you get up. We can talk once you’ve rested some.” Kota nodded and Kenny ended the call.

Kenny opened up google and started to search for flights. He could be out of the country right after Full Gear and ready to go. He booked a flight and settled into bed. Soon he’d be able to take care of the one he loved.

[sapphire-strikes]

Okay first your ending to that story was *mwah* perfect 👌. Second I remember you saying one time you didn't know whether to make Pabit sentient or not. What if he was and FK and Kamal freaked out seeing it for the first time and Boris just was kinda like "I thought you guys knew." I feel Pabit would be a second pair of eyes for Boris such as at "beddy time" if he was fast asleep and say FK/Kamal managed to get by and Pabit pops up yelling whichever one was up.

I've been meaning to write some about Pabit for a while but I was never quite decided on whether or not I considered him to be his own person (much like the Carlas) or just a regular puppet. There's something really endearing about him being a mini mischievous version of Boris though and I think there's a lot of potential for the dynamic between Him, Boris, the FK and Kamal.

• In the event that Pabit really was alive, it was another one of those things Boris just never got around to bringing up. Everyone already knew about the Carlas and much like his shadow form, he just never really questioned the strangeness of it all.

• Honestly, Kamal probably knows or at least suspects something. He was freaked out enough by the Carlas so he just avoided the subject of the puppet all together. Sometimes self care is pretending your roommate isn't keeping a sentient puppet replica of himself in your house.

• That brings us to Pabit himself. The cheeky, attention hungry, smile happy puppet of Boris Habit.

• When Pabit speaks his voice is higher than Boris' and lacks the Russian accent. Pabit is capable of moving and talking on his own but his voice is actually one Boris is capable of doing himself. It's unknown whether Boris is good at mimicking Pabit or Pabit speaks that way because that's the voice Boris gave him. Probably the latter.

• Even if you knew Pabit was alive it would be hard to tell sometimes whether Boris was talking through Pabit or Pabit was talking himself. The difference usually being that Pabit is much more expressive when he's talking on his own.

• Pabit is a little mischief maker but he's desperate for attention and interaction. Most of the time he's happy to let Boris puppet him around when in front of people but he's desperate for the opportunity to talk to them himself.

• He already loves you and Kamal but Boris prefers not to let him alone with either of you and has asked him not to interact with anyone when he's not around. Boris knows what a troublemaker he can be and doesn't want him to do anything to annoy his friends.

• Despite his unhappiness with this rule Pabit does listen to Boris most of the time but still finds little ways to interact with the people he grows attached to.

• Maybe the keys that you'd lost reappeared out of nowhere, setting inconspicuously next to the satisfied looking puppet. Sometimes when you leave papers on the table you come back to see them adorned with little doodles of flowers, pictures of Boris and even Pabit himself. Most of the time you chalked this up to Boris trying to be sneaky.

• On the other hand, Kamal's things tend to go missing when Pabit is bored, resulting in Kamal marching right into Boris' room and fishing them out of the puppets arm hole where they had been stashed. Gives Pabit the "I'm watching you" hand motion as he walks backwards out into the hall.

• One day you stumbled upon the puppet sitting innocently on the living room coffee table unsupervised. Giving into your base instincts you slipped it onto your hand.

Maybe that was an overstatement. It was a pretty big puppet so you just placed it over your forearm. The inside was clearly made for much bigger hands but you were still able to slip your fingers into the right spots and make it do a little chomping motion. You giggled then gazed down at the little replica of Boris, "You're a cute little guy aren't ya? Boris really did a good job on you." If you didn't know any better you could have sworn it was smiling wider than it was before.

When Boris walked in on your little playtime you lifted one of Pabit's little arms to make him wave, "Boris, we were just talking about you!" You remark jokingly.

Boris looked shocked at first but his expression soon softened when he looked down at the puppet on your arm, "Oh really? I'm sure he had a lot to say."

"Nah, I don't think he's much for conversation"

"You have no idea how wrong you are" There was a clear trace of exasperation in his voice that caught your attention.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Oh? Ah, never mind" He waved you off "It's about time for him go back to 'bed' anyways. I just finished cleaning his stand so I can put him back in my room now". You nodded and Boris reached for the puppet on your arm, gently attempting to pull it off. As soon as he did however you swear you felt something resist and the puppet stayed put on your arm despite his attempt to remove it.

Boris retracted his grip in surprise to stare at the puppet. It all happened so fast you weren't sure what really just happened but Boris looked like someone had just walked into his flower shop and smashed his prized tooth lilies. His expression shifted to annoyance and he crossed his arms, "So you're going to be like that? You know if you can't behave, I won't bring you out to play with Y/n and Kamal anymore."

Now you were the one that looked shocked. Was he talking to the puppet? I mean, he always talked to the puppet or through the puppet, usually both at the same time, but this was different. "Boris, what are you talking about?"

It seemed like Boris had finally remembered you were there as he sighed and looked disappointedly down at his felt doppelganger. "Oh it's nothing, Pabit is just being stubborn." His expression finally settle back into a smile, "Though I am a bit surprised. He usually never even lets other people put him on but I guess he always has been pretty 'attached' to you." He covered his mouth to laughed at a joke that only he seemed to understand.

You were still confused but Boris seemed to be acting normal again so you decided to brush it under the rug. You moved to pull the puppet off your arm yourself and it came off with no trouble. When you handed it to Boris he stared at it for a second before letting out a relenting, "Oh, very well" and slipping it on himself.

He turned to you with Pabit and smiled, closing the distance between you by holding the puppet out closely to your face, "Goodnight, Y/n!" It spoke cheerily. It then reached out, held onto your face and pressed it's mouth to the bridge of your nose. Letting out a drawn out, "Mmwwah!", sound before being pulled back to smile at you proudly. After saying your goodbyes both Boris and Pabit headed off to bed.

• You had to smile, Boris could be so silly sometimes. You'd have to ask him later how he got the arms to move without the wires.

• Not long after that you found more of those silly little doodles decorating the pages of the notebook that you'd left on the table. The scribbles depicted you and Pabit together with the puppet happily hugging the side of your face from his place on your arm.

• I can absolutely see Pabit being Boris' little tattletale. Kamal has caught on enough to move the puppet out of the room before doing something he doesn't want Boris to know about but you on the other hand don't catch on for a while.

• You cut your hand pretty bad one day and Boris asked you how it was later that evening. Even though you were home alone when it happened and you hadn't mentioned it to anyone.

• How did Boris know that you didn't eat breakfast this morning or that you snuck out of bed last night to watch tv? Boris's only explanation is that he "has his ways" but he's too busy lecturing you for you to press him further.

• One night you successfully snuck out of bed again and thought you were in the clear. What you didn't notice however was the puppet that seemed to get closer and closer to you each time it was out of your line of sight.

By the time you finally noticed it it was sitting on the coffee table in front of the couch. It actually caused you to jump when you turned around to see it almost directly behind you but quickly regained your composure and laughed it off.

Picking it up you turned it around a few times before placing it over your hand like you'd done once before. Feeling confident in yourself for your successful escape so far you decided to play around a bit. "You really spooked me, little guy! How'd you get out here huh? Did Boris forget to take you to bed?" You asked jokingly.

The puppets felt eyes stared up at you lifelessly and you let out a small laugh. "Hey now, don't look at me like that. You'll keep this between the two of us right?"

"...."

"Good boy, knew I could count on you!" Maybe you were just tired but you could see how Boris had so much fun with this. It was childish sure but you were certainly entertaining yourself.

Once you were satisfied with the puppet’s "agreement" to keep quite you moved to take it off your arm. "Okay, I've had my fun. So, you want to watch TLC or Cartoon Network?" You asked, not expecting an answer as you set the puppet back on the coffee table.

What you were expecting even less however was for the puppet's expression to shift to a scowl as its little arms wrapped around your hand when you went to pull it away.

"YoU shyOuld bEe in Bed!"

• Boris jumped up in alarm and Kamal fell out of bed at the scream that sounded from outside their rooms.

• You had literally thrown Pabit across the living room in surprise and were currently frozen in shock as it picked itself up, brushed itself off and hopped its way back over to climb back up on top of the coffee table.

"W-what did you just say?!"

It crossed it's arms and cocked an eyebrow at you as if sarcastically asking 'did you really not hear me? '. "I saYeD; u shYould bee in bEd! StAying up lAyte is bad 4 yor smile!"

"I.."

There was a long moment of silence between the two of you as the puppet looked at you expectantly. After a second you finally found the strength to speak, taking a step closer once you decided that it didn't really seem dangerous. "...You can talk?"

Your question seems to surprise it a bit and its angry expression shifted to one of pride. "I cAn do a lott moore than thyat!" It pointed at the sides of it's cheeks as it gave you a big smile. You went silent again and the puppet seemed to be inspecting your face, it's smile fading when it focused on your own worried expression.

"Sea? U stAyed up 2 layte and now you R all frowny :-(" It made it's way across the coffee table to where you were standing and hugged your knee. "It's okee! I'm hear 2 mayke u happie so tUrn thyat frowny upside downy!"

This wasn't exactly comforting considering that the puppet itself was the cause of your fear and you were quick to jump away when it touched you. This action was quickly followed up by guilt however when it looked genuinely surprised and then hurt by your rejection of its affection. It seemed as if it was about to speak again when Boris and Kamal both came clamoring out into the hallway.

"Kid, what happened?! We heard a scream is everything okay?"

They were both quick to approach you and check you over but your eyes were still locked on the puppet who was now looking at you sadly. Their worried questions were soon answered when they followed your gaze to the puppet sitting on the coffee table.

Boris was quick to gasp and lift the puppet up by the back of its coat like you would with the scruff of a kitten, "Pabit, did you wake them up?!"

"No, I folloWed thyem out here! " The puppet waved it hands in front of itself in defense but it seemed to forget about Boris quickly when it's eyes fixed of Kamal. "Oooh, hi, Karmal!" it yelled as it waved excitedly at him. Kamal responded by running a hand down his face.

"Oh, boy... Hi, puppet--Pabit, I mean..." The puppet seemed pleased by his acknowledgement but its attention was pulled back to Boris who seemed to be telling it off about something. You'd moved to almost hide behind Kamal who placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, "You okay?"

"I'm fine, I just...It can talk?" You looked at him for answers and he gave you a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah, tell me about it."

You were both pulled from your little moment of understanding by the voices that were being raised beside you.

"You shouldn't have scared them, Pabit" Boris's tone sounded disappointed.

"Eet wAsn't on porous, I swears it! I just wanTed 2 makE sure they waz gEtting enough syleep!" The puppets eyes moved back to you and it shook both it fists, "Y/n, yous been stayiNg up every nyight and knot geTting up 2 smile!"

"It said my name.. " Was your only response as you continued to shield youself behind Kamal. Your fear once again caused the puppet to deflate, it now hanging limply in Boris's grip with it's arms crossed as it looked at the ground.

"I'm sorry if he scared you, Y/n" Boris finally spoke to you.

"It's...it's okay, it just surprised me that's all..." You finally stepped out from behind Kamal. "How long has it been...alive?"

"Oh, since I made him." Boris answered as if it was the most normal thing in the world. "He doesn't usually talk to people unless I'm around though."

"I see..." Boris seemed to finally be taking note of your discomfort and said he was going to take Pabit aside for a moment, leaving you standing in the living room with Kamal.

"Yeah, the little guy used to cling to my leg when I’d work around the office back at the Habitat."

"So it really has been alive this whole time?"

"Yep, been dead silent since my fight with Boris though. First time I've seen him up and about since then. Been totally inanimate around anyone but Boris I guess. Until, now at least. Guess you have a knack for bringing things out of people and puppets!"

You both laughed and you turned to him quizzically, "Okay, but...how?"

Kamal raised a hand to stop you, "You think I got the know-how to answer that?" He smiled at you again "That's just more of Boris and I don't think even he could answer you to be honest."

"Heh, I guess you're right." You relented and Kamal wrapped and arm around your shoulder, offering you a comforting pat.

"Ahem"

You both looked in the direction of the cough and there stood Boris, holding something behind his back. "I had a talk with Pabit and I believe the two of you got off on the wrong foot. So..." He was looking at you hopefully and when you didn't look hesitant he took a few steps closer to you, "There is someone I'd like you to meet!"

You already knew what was about to happen next when he pulled the puppet out from behind him. The puppet fit perfectly over his forearm as he held it out to you. It was a very familiar sight but with much different implications since you now knew his little secret. Pabit himself looked to be a mixture of annoyed, nervous and sad and it refused to look directly at you despite your close proximity.

There were a few second of silence before Boris gave his arm a small shake, "Go ahead and introduce yourself, Pabit!", he whispered. Pabit remained silent, crossing his little arms once again and keeping his gaze fixated on the floor. "Pabit?"

The puppet muttered something under it's breath that none of you could make out. "What was that?" Boris asked

"I sayed; we already knows each other..." The puppet spoke out again more clearly. Clear enough that you could make out the hurt in its voice.

Oh, so that's what this was about. Thinking back now, you guess he was kind of right. The amount of times Boris brought out that puppet to cheer you up or just mess around were immeasurable. It was weird to think about; during a lot of the special moments you shared with Boris, Pabit was technically there too. He knew you at least, probably almost as well as Boris and Kamal did.

Before Boris could respond you spoke up, "I guess he's kind of right." This seemed to catch Pabit's attention and he finally looked at you again. "I'm sorry for throwing you, Pabit. I hope you can forgive me and hope we can...talk more in the future?" You gave a nervous smile and Pabit squinted at you suspiciously for a moment.

"Off course!" Boris let out an 'oof' when Pabit pulled his arm forward so he could hug your face, making the extra effort to rub his cheek against yours. "I still Luv u, Y/n!"

The shock must have finally been beginning to wear off because you were able to stop yourself from jumping away this time. You even reached up to to pat his head, “I uh, love you too, I guess?” Your words were spoken with uncertainty but they seemed to make Pabit happy as he let out an excited squeal and continued to cuddle your face. 

It was definitely a strange sight to behold; three people standing in a dimly lit living room with one of them holding out a puppet that was hugging one of the others faces. Boris was using his free hand cover his mouth as he smiled widely and Kamal was standing behind you with a tired but content look on his face.

• Now that you knew about Pabit, Boris loses him as a spy but gains him as a guard dog. Now there are two of them lecturing you about staying up late.

• Unlike Boris though you can actually bribe Pabit to stay quiet with cartoons, candy or just bringing him along if you're going somewhere. Now Boris is disappointed in both of you. 

• Pabit doesn't need to sleep but he can if he wants to. It's a little creepy because if he doesn't close his eyes beforehand they'll stay open. When sleeping he basically becomes a regular inanimate puppet until he wakes up.

• If you put him on he can actually prevent you from taking him back off. Tends to do it just to play around but lets go if the person whos arm he's on gets angry at him.

•Loves being used as a teddy bear. You feel something crawling up through your covers in the middle of the night and almost have a heart attack? It's just Pabit coming for snuggles.

Thanks so much for the request! Sorry, everyone, for the lack of content I appreciate all the requests I’ve been getting I’ve just been super busy lately so I appreciate your patience!