#and we are unfortunately aware that the reason we are struggling to finish in a timely manner

[mantisgodsdomain]

You may say to yourself things such as "wow, mantis god, you seem really behind for bugtober this year", and you would be right, but what you can't see behind the scenes is that we are actually being surprisingly productive in the hours of the day that are not dedicated to school, it's just that some months ago we happen to have thought to ourself "well, we enjoy learning things, so maybe we should take a hack at school since the grant is decent, get some actual certification on our resume so we can get a real job" and then forgot that the reason we don't already have official certification is because formal schooling historically has had worse effects on our overall mental health than almost literally anything else in our life, and now that's eating 4-6 hours of our life per day with an extra few hours of recovery after which makes it unfortunately difficult to work on art.

[roses-ink-dipped-pen]

iif this is okay ? a villain (kid) who got out of an abusive household and is currently hiding in superhero's house ;; then superhero has a talk w him but villain was too out of it to comprehend what's going on around him like how does he just realized that he wasn't exactly safe in his own house :(

superhero noticed and comforted him ;; SORRY IF THIS IS SPECIFIC anything else is ok u dont have to do tis :3

Okay granted, I may have gone a little off script xP

This doesn't exactly take place in Superhero's house, but I guess the Agency Headquarters is technically their home...? I mean, it is convenient.

I still hope this is a decent little story to read. Enjoy :3

TW: Mentions of emotional/mental child abuse, murder, fire

The superior took solemn strides down the corridors of their headquarters, swallowing their anger after returning from a rather abrupt meeting with the city’s most prized and honored heroes. 

Superhero, as the leader of the band of saviors, stood by good morals and kindred acts of empathy. They refused to ever deny a crook who was willing to amend their offenses a chance at redemption.

Those who shamefully defined the word ‘good’ with scorn written on their faces were to be put to justice. The process was swift, yet ruthless.

“There is no room for evil.” The wisest and greatest victors of the side of good would repeat to their pupils a thousand times over, and the cycle would go on.

But Villain was just a child.

It was a shame, not many heroes understood the point of mercy.

After the leader had finished chastising one too many of their followers, they stormed off into the interrogation room where the unfortunate victim sat. The atmosphere inside was damp, growing tense as Superhero and Villain made eye contact.

Superhero walked in, not bothering to follow any precautions when it came to confronting evil-doers. This was not an interrogation to the commander, they did not think about the orientation, deflection, or threats. They knew that whatever Villain did, was a response to fear.

The young boy cringed in his seat as his father’s rival sat in front of him, the table that separated the two of them was littered with plushies. The only reason why Superhero had a pen and paper was to record anything Villain said that stood out to them. However many cruel works the supervillain has forced him to commit, and how many works were aimed towards him, they would make a check on their tally. 

Superhero was well aware of Villain’s innocence. Even though he worked alongside Supervillain prior to the ‘interrogation’, resulting in the assassination of the city official, Villain was not to be held accountable. Many beg to differ, and that irked Superhero.

“You don’t have to be nervous, I’m not like the others.” 

Superhero grimaced as they referred to their fellow members. Villain nodded, reaching out with a small hand to grasp one of the plushies. A teddy bear Superhero picked out just for them. 

“I’m sorry.” Was all Villain responded with. He’s said that nearly fifty times that day. Superhero heaved a long sigh.

“I told you, whatever you did was a decision made for you, entirely by your father. You had no role to play in the incident, and I want you to go to sleep tonight knowing for a fact that we do not think that you are to blame.” They assured with a gentle grin, anxiously picking up their pen to question the boy about what he had been subjected to under the authority of Supervillain. They didn’t need to ask.

Villain huffed, swallowing the salty taste in his mouth as he struggled to hold back his cries.

“Dad told me he would hurt me if I didn’t help.” The young boy blurted out after a few moments of silence, clutching their shoulders.

“It was my job to burn down the community center, but I was too scared to-” Villain was interrupted by a fit of coughing as he choked on his tears.

Superhero was amazed. Villain was crying in front of them, to them. They must be doing something right. Superhero didn’t wallow in their newfound pride any longer; they had a job to do. 

They got up from their seat to kneel down beside the weeping boy, extending a hand for Villain to hold. Gingerly, they hushed the boy, whose face was already buried in Superhero’s shoulder.

Superhero held on tight to the boy, picking him up in a comforting embrace. 

“Dad left me behind as punishment. He said you would get rid of me for good...” Villain whispered, he was too exhausted to speak up.

Superhero was more than disgusted at this revelation. Like hell they would ever think about putting a child to death. It just goes to show that Supervillain truly possessed a sick and twisted imagination.

Only now did Villain realize that he was never in the right hands to begin with.

“Nothing on this planet would ever convince me of doing such a thing. You are worth more than what you were made to believe, and I won’t stop at nothing to make you feel loved. Do you understand?” Superhero’s devastated tone convinced Villain that he was in the right place.

The two stayed locked in a hug for what felt like an eternity, before Superhero offered them some cookies and a movie of his choice.

Superhero put the ‘interrogation’ on halt and allowed Villain to take a break from the accident. Later that week, it was revealed that Supervillain had committed a total of 21 sins and misdoings, all of them directed towards Villain. The superhero marveled as they thought of 21 ways to get back at him. Putting all morals aside, they went to pay Supervillain a visit.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Dancing 'Til the Break of Dawn - Pt 13

<Pt12

(TWST Zombie apocalypse AU where Yuu beast tames just a little too close to the sun)

His heart pounded in his throat. He struggled to swallow around it.

Slowly, Trey lifted his hands in surrender, giving a nervous smile.

Yuu took a long, deep breath. He realized, abruptly, that he had actually stopped breathing for a second there. Thought that that was probably a bad thing. He took another breath, just to get more oxygen in his system, so the black dots dancing in his vision would stop annoying him.

And then he smiled back, dragging the knife away. “Whoops! Sorry! Didn’t mean to do that!”

“You – you didn’t mean to threaten him?” Riddle asked, incredulously.

Yuu lifted his hands in a shrug. “Everyone has moments where they strongly consider murdering someone. It’s just easier when you have a knife on hand. You know how it is.”

“I don’t, actually,” said Riddle.

“That’s the problem,” Yuu said, cheerfully.

“The prob –?! You’re unstable,” Riddle said.

“I mean, I disagree, but who isn’t these days anyway?” Yuu shrugged.

Riddle’s face flushed. “I’m not.”

“You’re living in a simulation of what the world once was. It’s an illusion. And illusions can be shattered. What happens then? That’s literally a textbook example of instability. You like textbooks, right? You should know this!”

Riddle’s grip tightened on his knife.

“Yuu…” Cater said, slowly, a quiet warning.

It was nice that he was trying to help, Yuu supposed. It was unfortunate that the person Cater was trying to advise was him, though.

“You’re not better than us,” Yuu continued to say, smiling. “In fact, you're currently worse than us in pretty much every way. We can all survive on our own, for months, but you? You’d die immediately. How does it feel, knowing all those years of learning what’s ‘polite’ and alllll that pain was worthless, in the end?”

Riddle lunged for him, knife pointed outwards.

So died Riddle’s mental stability, according to his own standards.

Yuu had plenty of time to appreciate the irony, because he had been entirely prepared for this outcome, and dodged the incoming attack with ease.

“You're too easy to provoke,” Yuu commented. “Not a great trait to have during the apocalypse. Things that can be settled peacefully should be. It’s best to play it safe wherever possible.”

The butterfly knife slashed through the air.

“As for your actual fighting prowess. You telegraph your moves too much,” Yuu said, watching the blade flash by his face with a muted kind of boredom. He looped around Riddle, kicking him in the back, watching him stumble. “Don’t even get me started on your form.”

Riddle’s lips pulled back in a snarl.

He whirled around.

Only to find Ace standing over him, a knife pointed directly between his eyes. The momentary surprise was more than enough for Deuce to kick the weapon out of his hand.

The knife skipped across the floor, hitting the wall with a dull thud.

Yuu crouched down, briefly, to pick up the weapon, flipping it closed. He stuffed it into his pocket for safekeeping.

(Free knife! Ace was going to love him.)

“And, of course, your situational awareness could use work,” he finished, crossing his arms over his chest. “Basically, you’re not suited for this world. If I’m able to beat you in a fight, then anyone can. Trey is the only reason you’re still here today. I’d say you should thank him, but it’s partially his fault you’re like this, soooooo...”

Riddle scowled. "So, let's say I'm bad at fighting."

"I just did," Yuu said.

"My talents lie elsewhere. Is that really such a big problem?"

“You would have done great in the corporate world,” Ace said. Then, he shrugged, grinning. “This isn’t that.”

This will probably never be that again.

(Not that Yuu and Ace would say that aloud. Not in front of Deuce, at least.)

Deuce sighed. “What my friends are trying to get at, I think, is that rules are nice -.”

Ace snickered. "I have never in my life tried to convey that rules are 'nice'."

“... and it’s good to have a moral code. But adaptability is important.”

“But – but I –!”

“No one wants to be in the apocalypse,” Deuce said. “But we’re here, now. All you can do is try your best to come out the other side in one piece.”

It was silent as Trey and Riddle took in the new perspective. Considering Yuu had risked a stabbing to explain his point of view, he really hoped that he'd gotten it through their skulls. If that hadn't done it then, frankly, Riddle and Trey could die as victims of their own stupidity. Yuu had done enough to fill his 'good person quota' for the month. He was officially done.

Yuu clapped his hands together. “Anyways!” He said, brightly, as if the argument had never happened. “Do you guys know where the nearest subway entrance is?”

“You’re – you’re just going to say all of that and then leave?” Riddle said, incredulously.

“Yep!” said Ace, popping the ‘P’.

“Aren’t you scared I won’t listen to your advice?” Trey asked.

“Not our problem,” Ace shrugged.

“Besides, Cater’s staying, so even if you do relapse, at least Rosehearts-senpai will have company.”

Cater blinked. “How do you know that?”

“Cater. You had a whole broadcasting station. It's pretty obvious you were dying for some friends,” Deuce said, rolling his eyes.

“And our friend group is already full, so don’t even think about coming with us,” Ace added.

Cater raised an eyebrow. “In the nicest way possible, you three are the most stressful people I’ve ever met. Pass. At least Trey here can bake.”

“At least one of those stressful events was your fault. You shot Yuu,” Ace reminded him.

“Get over it. That was, like, last week.”

“Yeah, honestly, Ace, it’s not like you haven’t tried to kill me, too,” said Yuu. Mostly just for the sake of annoying Ace – it was unlikely that he would ever see Cater again after this, so there were no downsides to pretending he was above holding a grudge.

Trey frowned. “Am I the only person that hasn’t tried to kill you here?”

“Ehhhhhh, Cater wasn’t really aiming at me, so I don't know if he really counts. But, either way, no, Deuce hasn’t tried to murder me. He did try and keep me captive for a while, like you did, but…” Yuu snapped his fingers, turning to look at Riddle. “Oh! Before I forget! Rosehearts-senpai! Cooking oil makes a great accelerant for fire.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Trey asked.

“I be in situations.”

~

“Grim!” Yuu cheered the moment his eyes landed on the zombie, which had been pacing just outside of the apartment complex. He hugged his child to his chest, beaming. “Look at you,” he cooed, scratching him behind the ears. “You’re just as cute as the day I last saw you!”

“It’s been, like, a few hours,” Deuce said.

Yuu sniffed. “Ignore him, baby, he’s just jealous he doesn’t have a super cool zombie cat of his own.”

Ace pulled on his jacket, the tension in his shoulders melting away as he hugged himself. Or maybe he was hugging the knives taped to the inside of the jacket. It didn’t make that much of a difference either way.

“You’re both sick,” Deuce complained.

“You’re our friend! Sick by proxy!” Yuu said, pointing and laughing at the idiot who had allowed himself to be contaminated.

Deuce rolled his eyes, hefting his bat over his shoulder. “I’ve recently learned that you forgive murder attempts. Care to test it out?”

Yuu squeaked. “What, you want to kill me? Then you’d be giving the title of 'least dangerous' to Trey of all people, and I don’t think you want that.”

Grim growled.

Yuu smoothed his bristling fur. “Shhhhh, don’t, you’ll get your teeth dirty if you kill him.”

“Prick,” Deuce complained.

Something occurred to Yuu. He looked at Grim. “Hey, Trey gave us directions and a few recipes, so you can’t kill them.”

Grim sulked in his arms.

Yuu shook his head, something fond tugging at the corners of his lips. He pressed another kiss to the top of the zombie’s head. “It’s just three people. If you’re that desperate for food, you should downsize your army.”

“Yuu, are you a communist?” Ace teased.

“No, I just believe that if you can’t afford to give everyone a livable wage you shouldn’t be in business.”

“... that feels like communism,” said Ace.

Yuu considered this. “Maybe? What is communism?”

It was then that the three teens realized: they had no clue.

“Uhhhhh… bad?” said Deuce.

“It’s that thing Americans hate,” offered Ace.

“I love communism,” Yuu decided.

And, since his plan was to retrace his steps in hopes of finding the convenience store again, and he would therefore be going past his old high school, he might just get the chance to look up his newfound political ideology.

“Everyone ready?” Deuce asked.

Yuu hummed, glancing back towards the apartment complex. No one was in the window.

No one would see, then.

Yuu retrieved Cater’s gun from the bush.

He exchanged smirks with Deuce and Ace.

And then they took off running, laughing evilly to themselves.

~~~~~

Pt14>

[aprillikesthings]

can I finish this before I gotta get ready and leave for the Maundy Thursday service let's find out lol

(Edit: Nope.)

THREE MORE EPISODES LEFT

*cries*

s5 ep11 Failsafe

someone hold me

I have to actively suppress the urge to read the synopses of the episodes at this point

oh also lol this is just funny to me, I saw a post Elsewhere Online where someone watched all of spop the first time and they HATED the dumb names everyone has, and I think they mentioned Castaspella specifically.

And like FIFTY PEOPLE responded with "dude they had to use the original names from the 1980's series" and I was the only one there old enough to have watched the original series and I had to point out: the original series was made to sell toys. The vast majority of cartoons in 1985 were only made to sell toys. They gave everyone those dumbass names because it was easy for kids to remember and beg for the toys."

That's also why all the female characters in the original series have the exact same body type. Yeah the body shape itself was due to 1980's-era sexism, but also? It was so much cheaper to animate the show AND make the toys that way!

But also, it's hella ironic to me that the 2018 show has so little official merch!

And now, back to crying over cartoon lesbians:

good question

ugh I hate her

Shadow Weaver: "While you were traipsing around in space,"

OH MY GOD they were saving a few people's LIVES and it was kind of IMPORTANT but WHATEVER

"--some of us have been working to stop the Heart of Etheria from falling into Prime's hands. And we discovered the same thing you did. Rumors of a Failsafe that will break the restraints the First Ones built and set the stolen magic free." Glimmer: "Are you kidding? After everything that happened last time, you're still going after the Heart of Etheria? And you're helping her?" Castaspella: "We're trying to free the magic for all of Etheria so we can be strong enough to fight Prime. I'm doing this for your father and for you. Shadow Weaver is the lesser of two evils."

I love that she says this right in front of Shadow Weaver. Like "girl I hate her too"

nice

okay ngl I have mixed feelings about this one because unfortunately she's not entirely wrong here but also, shut the fuck up

(something something people are responsible for their own actions but also she wouldn't have done all that godawful shit if Shadow Weaver hadn't been such a shitty parent)

but yeah Catra gets up like she's about to fucking throw some hands and Adora's like It's okay bb

;_;

but also they do need the information Shadow Weaver and Castaspella have

so it turns out Mystacor was built on top of a First Ones' citadel? huh

Castaspella: "Beneath Mystacor, there are many secret tunnels and rooms, forgotten and sealed off. No one has been able to access them in centuries, but there are whispers of what they contain." Shadow Weaver: "An artifact known as the Crystal of Arxia, hidden there by a group of traitorous First Ones." Castaspella: "You said I could do it!"

lol they bicker like old marrieds

Adora: "If you figured it out on your own, why come back here? Why do you need us at all?" Shadow Weaver: "Because Mystacor is controlled by Micah, who, you may recall, is controlled by Horde Prime."

they've been TRYING

"If he seizes the Heart, it will all be over."

Stop toUCHING HER

oh god Adora turns around to ask Catra to help out--and she's gone

YOU'RE THE REASON SHE'S FUCKING "SULKING" and you fucking know it, why are abusers always so god damned surprised to find out their kids don't want to be anywhere near them

(I mean I know why, they think they should be able to control you forever)

aaahahaha Adora's just like Nah I'mma go look for her tho

anyway roll intro!

omg look at Netossa and Spinny on the bottom left awwwww

she looks so sad

well okay sad and angry

their conversation here is so good, because Catra's fully aware of why Adora's doing this, but is really struggling to push past how much she (justifiably!) hates Shadow Weaver and hates being around her

I actually do kinda wish I'd kept a list of all the times Adora does the self-sacrificial thing, separated into "someone asked her to do it" vs "nobody asked her to do it" lol

BUT ADORA EXPRESSES A NEED oh nice that's progress

Adora: "Hey, she can't do anything to us anymore. Please, come. We--I-could really use your help."

two things I really love about this: One, she doesn't say that she doesn't like Adora, just that it's not the reason she's going. Two, I feel like Adora knows damn well Catra's not being 100% honest here.

Like, to some extent Catra's saying this as a way of attempting to protect herself a little. She's taking baby steps towards vulnerability, and it's terrifying! And I think Adora can see that and is fine with it--not JUST because she's like "any crumbs are better than nothing" but ALSO because she doesn't want to push Catra.

Because yeah, if there was any actual doubt that Catra does like Adora--

WELL.

Entrapta was able to get Spinerella's chip out but says it had started fusing with her nervous system and they're running out of time to safely un-chip everyone.

But she's been digging around the network that connects all the chips to Prime, hoping to figure out how to disconnect everyone at once, and Bow gives her a little encouragement, it's really sweet.

OKAY so everyone who can, teleports to Mystacor with Melog making them invisible. (Apparently Catra doesn't get motion sick from it anymore which is nice lol)

I love the way they animated them being invisible

oh GOD okay

Catra turns around and says "looks like there's no sorcerers here" while, unfortunately, a sorcerer walks into the room. Shadow Weaver grabs Catra and puts her hand over her mouth to keep her quiet, and Catra (understandably!! but unfortunately!!) jerks away in fury and yells

And her fury causes Melog to drop the invisibility

And now the chipped sorcerer knows they're all there

they manage to duck the attack but Adora goes to transform into She-Ra--and can't do it

she had this issue last episode aaaugh it's not from being near Shadow Weaver she wasn't there

okay but also Adora runs behind a pillar to hide from an attack with Catra and it's cute

girl help why is this giving me so many emotions

y'know it's funny how often I've bumped into posts of people who are confused as to why Adora starts trusting Catra again so quickly, and I frequently wonder if they forget all the childhood flashback scenes of these two. To varying extents they both spent their entire childhoods seeing the other as their only consistent source of comfort and (something resembling) safety, and with some notable exceptions Adora's spent the last four seasons (which was like three or four years) visibly holding out hope that one day she could trust Catra again. This despite the fact that she now has other sources of safety and comfort and love!!! Being with Glimmer and Bow and everyone else was healing, sure; but it never erased her grief over losing Catra. She always, always held out the tiniest flame of hope that Catra would change sides.

And Catra basically tried lighting her own grief on fire (metaphorically and kinda literally) over and over and it just didn't go away, and I feel like when she saved Glimmer and apologized to Adora she had sort of come to terms with the fact that her grief over losing Adora couldn't be burned away, but of course by then she figured she'd fucked up so bad Adora would never forgive her or trust her again. And rather than take it out on other people or suffer any longer she was willing to just die, instead. She really did think that sending Glimmer to Adora was going to be her last act, and she wanted Adora to know she was sorry before she fucking DIED. And I don't think her saving Glimmer was consciously meant to be proof that she meant her apology, but it was. And that's part of why Adora trusts her again.

The fact is, even after everything that happened, both of them had a hole in their hearts shaped like the other. ;_;

And that's why Adora runs and hides behind the same pillar as Catra. (I mean yes, it was also closer, but that's not tHE POINT)

Anyway, this is all why, as I previously noted, Adora's not being pushy. That failed on her, spectacularly; the couple of times she tried it. Asking Catra to come along on this mission is the closest she's come. And even then, it wasn't "you're a good person deep down and you should change sides because I think I know you better than you know yourself," It was "please do this for me, because I need your help." And Catra is fully aware of how hard that is for Adora.

And these two still have a lot to work out post-canon (like, Catra has still got to deal with her need to not just be seen as Adora's sidekick/shadow, and lbh right now some of the rebellion is like "we're only putting up with you for Adora's sake" as if Catra was Yoko Ono) but that's part of why I'm writing a fic lolol

I have so many feelingssss on a related note I spent like fifteen solid minutes last night in bed having taken an edible and listening to my playlist and staring at this gifset lolol

ANYWAY Castaspella knocks out the chipped dude and they run for it

AAAND lol I gotta get ready to go to church. There's still 17:30 left on this episode. Pfft.

BACK FROM CHURCH I washed someone's feet, they washed mine, they stripped the altar, I go back at one or two in the morning for the overnight vigil

In the meantime: gonna finish this episode

(what is my life sometimes)

Entrapta plans to find a bunch of clones so she can figure out how their signals to Horde Prime work. Swift Wind is like Ugh, fine, I'll go with you, someone's gotta save your ass

Entrapta: "Thanks, bird horse!"

lol how many times have they had that convo

A family can be a sorcerer and her evil ex, a girl and a boy, two traumatized lesbians, and a cat

But also it looks like something out of an episode of Scooby Doo

Shadow Weaver opens a magic door

ngl that's PRETTY. like it's obviously about the Heart of Etheria but wow!

(and there's a dinosaur???)

Adora notices how stressed out Catra is and says "It'll be okay...Trust me." ;_;

Shadow Weaver: "There's no time to waste!"

"...disturbance."

The disturbance was your fault, dumbass. I am reminded of all the times my dad got angry at us for being afraid of him. And would hit us. For being. Afraid of him. Because y'know. That's how you stop a kid from being afraid of you. By hitting them.

In any case Shadow Weaver is still trying to get between them and separate them and I just really need this bitch to stop.

(Yes yes I remember she dies later)

Castaspella: "We're on the right path. The Crystal of Arxia was rumored to be the key to reaching deep magic within Etheria."

"But those who hungered for more power have long sought other ways to obtain the deep magic...with disastrous results."

HIT THE IMAGE LIMIT lemme reblog

[heartofspells]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the tags, @brandileigh2003 @tracingpatternswrites & @mycupofrum!

Username: heartofspells

1. How many works do you have on A03?

96, all of them HP except for one lonesome Supernatural fic

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

1,685,584

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Harry Potter, though I've dabbled in a few others, only one fic of which is still available for Supernatural

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

At the Healing Edge of Broken

Prick the Craving, Watch it Seep

Multiplying Parents

How to Succeed in Business

The Tying of Canines

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to. Hardly ever anymore, and unfortunately, I've got solid reasons for that. I will respond to them if someone asks a question that legitimately needs answering or similar. And while I maybe don't respond to them anymore, I do read every single one multiple times. I love comments, and I'm so grateful for everyone who takes time out of their lives to leave them for me <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ah...heh. That's really not an easy question to answer for me. I guess, coming from a personal stance, knowing everything I put into it and the build up that led to then ending, I'd have to say Wasteland. That's the one that's still lingering with me to this day.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

That's also hard to answer, because as much as I love flooding my fics with angst, I have a lot that end very happy or hopeful. Narrowing it down to longer fics with more character arc throughout, I'd probably say This Way We Fall because it leaves them on such a high note after all the struggle.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Unfortunately, yes, but that's part of it, I guess. I've become better at ignoring it.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, but at the end of the day, it's mostly just typical smut when I look at it, though I do have a few kinkier ones scattered in there (ceiling smut, er...inter-species stuff). There's also the...not entirely nice stuff when it comes to smut as well simply because I like exploring all aspects of most everything.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Haven't so far. Doubt I ever will, but you never know.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of. I hope not.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have! I co-wrote Family on the Mend with @tracingpatternswrites and it was so much fun! I'd love to co-write more fics in the future!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

It's gonna have to be Wolfstar just because that's where my heart has rested for years, but there are others that run as close seconds.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh god. YOU. It's not posted anywhere, still only exists in my docs, but I'm convinced that fic will haunt the rest of my life.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I always struggle with questions like this, but that also means I've spent a lot of time thinking about it over the years. I think, mostly based on reactions I've had and what other people have said, that I'm quite good at capturing heavy and deep emotions, hopefully enough to not only grip a reader, but to plunge them into the heart of a scene and make them feel those emotions as well.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Details? There are times I think I'm terrible at this, and not just in fiction writing. It's in everything. Something might exist in my head, and I sometimes manage to forget that not everyone can see my exact thoughts and know what I'm thinking, so I leave important bits and pieces out of things and explanations that only end up confusing people - or worse, makes me seem not so great in general simply because I forgot the inclusion of a very important point when it mattered most.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm not against it, though it's not something I generally do because I don't know any other languages and that's a risky game to play. I'll only include it if I've spoken to someone who speaks that language fluently and has agreed to translate for me. But having other languages in a fic is a wonderful thing, especially if you're trying to include other cultures, though speaking as someone who has to rely on things like Google Translate that aren't always accurate, included translations are always appreciated.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

This changes constantly for me. I'm not sure how it couldn't. I love most of the fics I've written, and it's like choosing a favorite child sometimes. However, I think right now I'd have to say it's a toss up between CRuSH (i'm just so proud of this one) and Multiplying Parents (also very proud, and this one was so much fun and makes me grin every time i think about it).

Open tag! Because I'm very late to this and I've got the feeling most everyone has done this by now.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

1, 4 and 12 for the bl tropes ask game?

1- Enemies to lovers 

Honestly, there is an unfortunate lack of true enemies to lovers in BL, for which I am perpetually upset because that trope is one of my favorites. I have seen the correct answers of shows like Semantic Error floating around so know that is my true answer, but I am going to break the rules, because I am gay and I can do what I want and do both a flip of the trope- lovers to enemies and I am going to go with a ghost ship:

ToddBlack, Not Me 

One of the biggest reasons why I am an advocate for no branded pairings in BL is because GMMTV truly lost out on a massive opportunity to let Gun kiss multiple boys. I think this is perhaps one of my favorite dynamics I’ve seen from GMMTV. The emotional impact of these two boys beating the shit out of eachother while not being able to finish the job? Incredible, juicy, you can tell that there is love there and ultimately it is so rare a thing (and so delicious a morsel every time as a result) to explore when people who love each other in whatever form that takes find themselves on opposite sides of a conflict, the atrocities they are able to commit against each other, and what causes them to pull back at the last minute. 

We could have had something here, we did have something here, and I want more of it. 

4- Long Term Pining 

PatPran, Bad Buddy

Again, while I know there are definitively more correct answers, especially with how frequently long term pining is really applied in BL, I am choosing something perhaps a little less traditional. While I feel like overall, Bad Buddy would fall under a Forbidden Love trope category for me, we all know how long Pran has been aware of his feelings for Pat, and how he has been punished as a result of being near him. I think part of what makes the Episode 5 kiss so memorable, at least for me, is the aftermath. The way you would almost expect both Pat and Pran to be happy to finally be on the same page with their feelings for each other. 

But because of the feelings Pran has nurtured for Pat for so long, because that trope exists in some form in this narrative, Pran stops himself from getting more of what he wants. The forbidden love makes their relationship hard and complicated, but the pining is a cherry on top of a very emotionally and politically tenuous story. 

12- Forced Proximity 

GAYA 

SA

PELIKULA

There are a few good options here too (and I have other answers if anyone wants to ask me this one again), and Gaya Sa Pelikula gets bonus points for also harboring a fake dating trope as well. But man oh man, what a beautiful story. This show is brilliant, and funny, and heartbreaking, and has perhaps the most emotionally effective use of end title screens that I have ever seen. Those boys really went through it together and because of each other and it was really interesting to watch a kid struggling so hard with his internalized homophobia while living with someone who is out and proud and comfortable with his sexuality.

For the BL Romance Tropes Ask Game

[coffeewithcutcaffeine]

How the Ink Flows: 2024 scribbles by one Miss Lin ✨

Because my uni schedule has been kicking me in the butt constantly these days, I have decided to write this post to let you all know (as well as to make myself try to stick to my goals) what I am currently working on and what I would love to share with you this year! ❤️️ Also, at the end of the post under the cut, there is an important question regarding my taglist -- please, read the info if you follow my works and/or want to read some of them!

VOIEVOD

Vlad Dracula will most definitely remain my number-one priority for this year. So far, the update on the upcoming works for his story looks like this:

I am currently working on Second Chances, the work that maps one of the epic battles of Vlad's life, namely his spectacular duel with the former Voivode Vladislav II that marks the beginning of his second (and longest) reign. I have had to put my writing on hold for a while as I tackle my new uni schedule but will do my best to get back to the WIP as soon as possible!

Next, there is Novus Rex, Nova Lex which deals with the beginnings of Vlad's rule, and the tensions between him and the boyars. This WIP is also a strong homage to the wonderful Romanian movie Vlad Ţepeş (1979) as I have decided to borrow a fabulous scene from it and use it for Vlad's story. Hopefully, I will do it justice!

I would also love to focus on the beginnings of Vlad and Cătălina's relationship. You have already had the chance to meet the wonder of a woman, but the start of their love story and all the circumstances that lead to it definitely deserve to be told chronologically.

If all goes well, I would try to also dip my toes into Vlad's years with the Ottomans and try to explore the Drăculești family. A certain Mușat will most likely also make an appearance.

OPEN HEART

The world of Dr. Laura Levchenko has currently been put on hold for an indefinite period, mainly because I am heavily struggling with the overall story and some characters in it. I would also love to drift away from her role in the romantic relationship and explore her character as an individual. I think there is a lot of work to do for me to reassess what I want to say through my writing and what I want to do with the plot.

If all goes well and inspiration kicks me in this universe, I would love to delve into a series mapping her life directly after the maitotoxin attack. If you want to see Laura away from Ethan and shine individually in her pain, then this might be for you. ❤️️

CRIMES OF PASSION

I have been planning to finish a few works I have in mind for this story since summer but, unfortunately, the WIPs keep being abandoned by their negligent writer! I want to heavily redo and expand what we have been given in canon and turn it into something more serious and personal -- being from Eastern Europe, this story hits very close to home, and I would love to give it the levity and portrayal it deserves. So far, the WIP that I would love to work on more is called Silence, Silence, Dry and Black and explores heavier cultural and political themes. I am aware it might not be everyone's cup of tea but hope you would give it a shot nonetheless.

THE WAYHAVEN CHRONICLES

I am still exploring the story and toying around with my M!MC but, if all goes well, I have a very particular idea for a fic I would love to write this year! I am still not sure if I will make a single work from it or divide it into two shorter fics, but I hope to make it happen. Expect pure indulgence on my part as this will be my inner romantic pouring her heart out.

TAGLIST

This way, I would also like to share that I am thinking of creating a taglist for those who are still willing to read my word vomit! I would use it to:

tag you on my Voievod works that I post both here and on AO3,

tag you on my TWC fics that I will most likely post both here and on AO3 when the time comes,

tag you on posts regarding my OH and CoP fics that (for reasons) I have decided to post solely on AO3. However, I have chosen to always make posts with an AO3 link attached to them so that you do not miss a heads-up whenever a new fic is published.

Please, do not hesitate to write a comment under this post or send me a DM if you want to be added to my taglist! ❤️️

[luckylolabug]

Tagged by the lovely @starwritingbri <3 <3 1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 17, after I yoinked some down. We won't talk about how many WIPs I have that aren't posted haha.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 150,958

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Uhh, multifandom girlie here so. Lockwood & Co, the DCU, Yuri on Ice, I currently have a folder of Six of Crows stuff getting ready for Whumptober but they're not posted yet, sometimes I one off and write stuff for Star Wars or TAZ: Balance. Ive got a big project going for Heartstopper that isnt posted yet, and I have a secondary account for MHA stuff lol. Also some joint stuff for FMA with Bri eventually!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

In So Many Words- Yuri!!! on Ice

Sorry, This Page Cannot Be Reached- Yuri!!! on Ice

Slow Dancing in the Dark- Lockwood and Co

Barrels and Bootlegging- Lockwood and Co

Shimmer in the Haze of Winter Lawns- Lockwood and Co

5. Do you respond to comments?

For the most part, yes! I can get behind on them a bit, but I do try and keep up with them because the support is important to me.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't write a TON of angst??? But I want to say Heaven is Not Fit to House a Love Like You and I just for the context. Ask me again once I get my Whumptober stuff up in October and that's going to change, though.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of the stuff I write has happy endings! It's hard to pick just one?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Unfortunately. Weirdly, most of the fandoms I've dabbled in that have reps for being "the worst" have been the nicest to me as far as fics go, but I've gotten some very nasty comments on things for certain fandoms that don't have that kind of reputation. Fan culture is weird. I wish I could say it doesnt affect me buuuuut. There's a reason I stepped back from writing so much L&C and tend to drift with other fandoms more now.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have a few times, and I'm not like. Directly opposed to it? But it's not really my Jam a good 99% of the time and honestly I prefer just keeping most of my stuff Fade to Black or vague and not in depth if it comes up. I like focusing more on other stuff, but I don't think smut is bad either!

10. Do you write crossovers?

Not as far as I'm aware. I have like. Some AU type stuff thats "This world but with these characters" but its not a direct crossover where the characters from multiple universes interact. I guess unless youre counting the DCU as a whole but??? Lol?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

To my knowledge, no? But it could have been, I guess.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope! But I'd be cool with it! My mom helps me with Spanish in a few things for the Heartstopper project I have going since she's fluent, but those are just a few lines.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not anything POSTED, but eventually that'll change!

14. What is your all-time favorite ship?

Y'all, I am in too many fandoms for this lol. I don't know that I even HAVE an all-time fav that shoots above the rest? I have favs in fandoms, but not as a whole????

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Uhhhhh. Probably Barrels and Bootlegging??? I hate even putting this out there but fandom politics and the amount of BS just was draining the hell out of me when I was working on stuff so I don't even really have any plans to go back to finishing any of my stuff for L&C at this point. I'm happier writing other places, right now!

16. What are your writing strengths?

uHHHHHH???? Bri says its details, so I guess that? Putting details into everything?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

All of them. LOL. No, but honestly, I struggle with the editing process most because I think I end up re-writing things a good 5 or 6 times before I decide its fine and even then I struggle after stuff is posted just because I want to try so hard to keep things cohesive and correct. I spend way too much time Googling shit that shouldnt even really matter, but the small things matter to ME.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

The only thing I've really done it with is throwing in some stuff in Spanish, and I was only okay with that because my mom is fluent and offered to look it over for me to make sure it was correct. Otherwise I'm like.....Google Translate is inaccurate a lot and the idea of putting something in a fic that could be WRONG freaks the hell out of my OCD and I can't do it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Oh, jeez. Uhh. Honestly it was either ATLA or the Halo games? I don't fucking know, it was pretty mid 2000s. I still have my log in for FF.net and LiveJ but I dont really want to go look because Im sure I'll hate it.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

This feels like a shit answer because it's not POSTED YET. But I really have been eating up everything I've written so far for this "Six of Crows but make it Modern" thing thats sitting at about 40k words right now. So probably that??? If its one that I have POSTED, then I think it's probably one of the 5+1s I did for Yuri on Ice just because those were really fun and light. I'm TERRIBLE at tagging people so uh. @fluffypinkkitties @twiilys and @chibiosaka I guess????

[mamamittens]

WELP, Christmas was nice! Great to see my brother again and I collected all the animal crossing museum shit except the art pieces but that's not something I can force without an excessive amount of effort so like, I'm good lol

Ah, hopefully I can gather the energy to do an event piece tomorrow. Orders slowed down and we get out at our normal time so I guess we'll have to see. There's hope yet I'll finish them all before 2024 lol

Ramble time, you know the drill lmao

So, there's a fun thing I used to experience often when I actually left my house where I was typically mistaken for a guy. A younger, possibly cute guy if that hilarious encounter in highschool is any indication (I'm a bit blind to my own level of attractiveness, not going to lie, which is a pretty big step up from hating it.... Anyway!)

Something about my relaxed posture, baggy hoodie, and short hair. Not entirely sure, but it is impressive given the fact that I've had a considerable bust size since early high school. I assume they never looked closely at my side profile lol

Anyway! It would be fun to adapt that a tad for Nikia, but more cause with that devil fruit able to adjust her size. I imagine she'd have an easier time taking a leadership role while presenting more masculine, even if it's incidental. Especially since she's not typically confrontational.

The change isn't something she needs to hold onto, thankfully, but it is more relaxing to settle into her natural form. So there's no danger of her forgetting what she actually looks like. Usually reserved for when she's locked into her cabin for snowstorms alone. Curling up in her freshly preened wings.

Her usual 'work mode' appearance is smaller bust (less weight jostling about during motion, did you know that you can break your collar bone with sufficiently sized tits when running? Horrifying), taller, and snapping open her natural wingspan when she wants to cut an argument short. It tends to scare the shit out of people when paired with an RBF and her wings going from little cherub size to dwarfing her frame in a fraction of a second (steam slipping from her teeth from the sudden change).

Hella whiplash when she uses her customer service voice. Really freaks people out more and she abuses this to throw people off when they're being difficult.

Unfortunately, with her own cabin and few reasons to socialize with people, her social skills get pretty rusty. Including the habit she usually has of exaggerating her expressions to clarify her intent or communicate. She still does it, but not as often as she should, so she's left faltering a little when people act negatively to her when she's trying to lighten the mood. She means well though, she's just not big on strangers being around her a lot.

This difficulty expressing and communicating emotions also unfortunately means that she has a hard time controlling her temper when it finally runs loose. Often getting overwhelmed and crying before shutting down. Obviously, she prefers to avoid this when possible, so tries to maintain a chill attitude that skews towards permissive. Mostly by accident.

This attentiveness towards her temper is also why she doesn't typically participate in competitive incidents as she's aware that her attitude is less than favorable during these events. Her difficulty with a social filter can often lead to her saying very harsh things without thinking.

All this leads to quite the unexpected series of events leading up to Marineford, as she doesn't fully trust herself to go rouge, doesn't believe she was the right to handle Teach, and struggles to cope with the (perceived) loss.

[ran-orimoto]

I am on cloud nine to see Junzumi fandom waited years to have so much content monthly. Drawings, stories. Thank you. Do you accept prompt games? The story of Junpei crying over the Koujirou newborn made me crying. Would you writesone similar shot? Izumi and Junpei deal with baby or Izumi conceives him and tells Junpei or whatever but I want more them x family stories.

{ • This Anon asked me to write this at the beginning of September. Of September, guys. And I’m showing up with this today, which is really embarassing but at the same time I tried writing as much as I can to make myself forgiven. This isn’t really any of your prompts, but I had this idea in my mind and I wanted to write it. It kinda fits, I guess?

• Some dialogues are in italics to indicate Junzumi is speaking italian

• I will explain more about my silly “worldbuilding” hcs on AO3 very probably. }

“SOMETIMES WE LET OURSELVES THINK”

Izumi rushed out of the weirdly-silent kitchen, three large dishes distributed on both her hands. She turned her head from a side to the other making her tall hat risk to slip off her head, but she didn’t really care when it actually happened.

“Who cares…” She muttered, trying maintaining her calm.

She couldn’t help beaming when she spotted Junpei standing in front of the only occupied table with his arms and legs splayed in a very theatrical fashion. In other occasions, she wouldn’t have needed to get closer to understand what he was holding and the reason why a toddler was clapping his hands enthusiastically. Still, that night she was aware she herself absolutely had to be the one serving those steaming meals, so she walked to the table with a triumphant appearance and that wide smile that could have never missed while she was facing clients.

“Here is your dinner!” She announced, placing the plates on the tablecloth with impeccable precision Junpei and the whole family silently observed in awe.

Then, she bowed at them and Junpei did the same, accidentally hitting the table and making it shake, its full glasses included. Izumi glared at him, as fast as a bolt not to be noticed, but she melted at the sight of the lively kid laughing at Junpei’s clumsiness. Reassured, she proceeded to apologize to their clients, explaining them unfortunately the blackout from a while before had greatly slowened the preparation of the last orders of the night, which were the adults’ spaghetti alla chitarra in ragù di polpo and the little boy’s cotoletta alla milanese.

“We will offer coffee when you’re done, and also our cantuccini, which I personally find extremely good along with a good liquor,” Junpei politely added , before vivaciously grinning at the child and his big orbs looking up at him with expectation. “And I can’t forget about this little obedient gentleman’s dessert!”

Izumi sighed as he struggled to put his colourful tissues in the many pockets of his apron…And the ones of the trousers hidden under it…And the other ones of his sweater. She did hope he wasn’t going to forget those things in there again, just like it had happened last time she had loaded the washing machine, had turned it on and had soon discovered she, indeed, he had made such a disastrous mess. She knew she should have checked every inch of his clothes, -maybe his socks too, who knew-, but back then tiredness had won over her after having waited for Junpei to return for the whole night: she hadn’t seen him for more than three months and she was so glad he was finally on holiday now.

They left the trio of diners alone, so they could savour their so-longed food.

Waiting for them to finish, Izumi and Junpei started preparing the restaurant for the night: she went outiside with a pile of blankets under her arm, while he was sent to the storage room to get a broom, a mop and a bucket.

Despite the fact they were pretty far from each other, their amused gaze would occasionally search for their partner’s silhouette or even their shadow. Both wanted to see each other in the middle of their assignments, especially Izumi, who found it hard not to often turn her head in his direction to spot the knowing looks he was sending to that child as well.

Sometimes…Just sometimes…, She told herself as she overlapped layers of soft blankets in a box laying on the ground. Suddenly, she felt a lump in her throat. She gasped at the realization she couldn’t give a proper continuation to that sentence wanting to take shape in her mind.

Thus, she stood up and forced herself to ignore what Junpei was doing. She contemplated the starry sky, instead, and those tall trees offering a partial frame to that scenario.

She considered her thoughts could have never been sent away by the wind of that night: only a much stronger and faster wind than that breeze could have freed her. Actually, it dawned on the young woman letting them leave on those impalpable, weak waves would have pushed her to spread her arms to the firmament to get them back and hold them tightly against her chest, so they would have never parted from her again.

Sometimes…Just sometimes…

She heard cheerful voices coming from inside and approaching her pretty rapidly, until Junpei’s orbs peeped out from the door window, accompanied by smaller ones showing up at the level of his knees.

“Chef, which dessert would you pick for such a good little man?”

She blinked at him impassively, too shaken by the effects that night was provoking on her, but she managed to crack a kind smirk by controlling whatever was happening in her soul.

“Chef Orimoto recommends…A good chocolate soufflè!” She happily exclaimed, totally gaining her composure back by putting her hands on her hips.

“Un fondant au chocolat!” Junpei echoed, resorting to that bit of french he had had to learn to play some tenor roles. He sniggered at that flan taking consistency in his imagination, excitement filling his veins at the mere drawing its contours in his fervent fantasies. Still, an intrusive memory destroyed that fantasy in thousand pieces, the same destiny his grin met. “W-wait, what?!” He shouted, dismayed, letting the kid’s hand go and taking Izumi aside for some seconds. His spheres, which were filled with the colour of his favourite food, were swelling of disappointment. “At lunch you told me we had no chocolate soufflè left!”

“Yes, I did. But now I will cook another one. I’m a chef, remember.” She simply replied him, doe-eyed and as lovely as she could get, and she abandoned him with his mouth open.

“This is unfair. Unfair!”

…

Just under an hour passed before the couple could finally close the restaurant and go to bed. The kid said goodbye to his larger, much larger new friend with a hug making his parents gasp in shock. Needless to specify Junpei didn’t mind that sign of affection. He limited himself to laugh so softly it looked like if he was in the grip of a hiccup attack. After all, how could he have kept himself from reacting in that way? It was so endearing to see those minuscule, -from his perspective, at least-, hands trying to spread as much as they could to press themselves against his belly.

Out of blue, the child reached out to him with a short arm, trying to find something in his shorts’ pockets with the other.

“For you,” He chirped, placing on Junpei’s palm a little toy train. “Because you said you liked twains. Mamma said I will share lot of my toys because the stwork is taking little brother here soon. I want to share my twains with you, Signor Junpei”.

It took a while for Izumi to make him follow her back home, but he still seemed so thunderstruck when she managed to make him move.

She sweetly smiled as they headed home below pinkish whispers of wind blooming like cherry trees, before Izumi’s mellowed sight.

Sometimes…Just sometimes…I like losing myself in thoughts.

XXX

After they had got married, the next step had been to buy a house that was theirs and only theirs; a house they could have called home; a house they could have decorated the way they pleased unlike the impersonal apartment they used to share in Venice.

Surely, both didn’t really expect Izumi would have got the chance to open a restaurant so soon. They imagined they would have remained in Venice for their whole existence, among gondolas and frequent floods, whereas life had eventually led them to the italian star par excellence: Milan.

There their previous efforts had allowed them to buy a lovely two-storey house that wasn’t that far from Milan’s center. That was an advantage for Izumi, who had decided to settle her restaurant in a pretty large alley of that zone, and for Junpei too, since he didn’t need to take the tram to get to La Scala theatre. His dream was to get to perform on that brilliant stage someday, -like it was for every opera singer, after all-, but for now he would keep on settling for rows of offers coming from the most disparate italian theatres…And for watching refined shows at La Scala.

They had taken months to finish furnishing the rooms of the first floor, besides their bedroom and bathroom, and there was still so much to do! Moreover, their living room was still missing the sofa they had ordered from a shop and there was a sort of hole making that room area look so empty.

Therefore, when the following morning that sofa finally got home, Izumi couldn’t resist to immediately try it.

Certainly, it would have been much better if the delivery hadn’t arrived so early, when they were still in their dream world, sleeping in the weirdest positions because the previous night’s tiredness had been stronger, much stronger than their good will to get rid of their work clothes and decently put a blanket over their bodies.

When Junpei opened the door, he was so sure he looked like some ghost with a considerable weight on, and who knew why he had refused help from the delivery man. Izumi found him forcing the packed sofa through the passage of the door and ran to him when he fell on the parquet, after having succeeded in his intent.

Now the sofa was at the center of the living room, just like it was supposed to be, and an exahusted yet happy Izumi was tasting how comfortable it was with her eyes closed. She heard the noises Junpei was producing in the kitchen, from him dropping a pod in the coffee maker to his thumb heavily pressing the power button; from him slowening his movements not to pour the beverage on the cupboard to him…Probably drinking it all in one breath, predictably burning his tongue.

He obviously cursed, but his pain didn’t keep him from approaching her with clumsy steps and placing his hands on the backrest.

They rapidly shifted, though, and rested at the sides of her neck transmitting a warmth that wasn’t only a physical sensation. Gentle palms went up and down on her skin and filled her chest with invisible fluttering butterflies.

“It’s perfect,” He whispered, so slowly it seemed he didn’t want to wake up a dormient angel.

“This is exactly what it looked like in your project,” She underlined and, in response, he bursted in a loud laughter whose power projected itself on her shoulders, making those caring hands suddenly generate an earthquake spreading in her whole body.

“It’s so weird to hear something I’ve designed has come to life, not going to lie.” He managed to confess among his chuckles which mixed with occasional ones coming from her.

However, she still gave her best to sound and appear as serious as possible, raising a slender index in his direction with simulated confidence.

“Well, first of all, it’s not that hard to decorate the rooms of a house…”

“You think so? Geez…”

“Secondly, you stayed grounded and didn’t imagine weird stuff,” She continued attempting to suffocate her desire to let her repressed giggles free. She couldn’t help recalling the complex wedding cake he had drawn on a random paper before they got married: it was as tall as San Marco’s belltower, -as he had jubilantly described back then-, it was made of enormous amounts of chocolate he had calculated with strange multiplications, divisions and equivalencies, -which she had obviously ignored in his blabbing-, and, most of all, it was impossible to be prepared. That was the reason why what he got was an ordinary three-layered wedding cake covered with strawberries and cherries, -choice made by the bride, who had also baked it, of course-, and with some chocolate chips here and there, -a generous concession to the groom since she couldn’t stand the idea of getting him disappointed during their special day…-.

“I like thinking big,” He shrugged, amused, as if he had plunged in her same recollection. He decided to sit next to her making the pillows she had accurately put on the sofa bounce and fall off it.

“And I’ve grown big. Maybe too big,” He winced in embarassment, scratching his head and hesitating before getting them back.

Izumi answered him by getting closer and latching onto his thick arm. She didn’t really care about the pillows on the carpet, since now that his broad presence was there, next to her, her contemplation of their new living room had changed nature before her sight. The scenario seemed to have transformed: it looked brighter and more colorful, fuller of meaningful symbols and signals peeping out each object, each corner, each millimeter.

“We’re at home,” She found herself muttering with emotion because ,at that moment, her reality finally crystallized, along with the awareness another brick had been added to the stairs of their life together. And yet, staring at that living room made her feel like there was only something missing to complete the picture of the most serene sky she had ever admired.

But she had never got the occasion to even engage into a minimal conversation about it, due to how busy they were, especially him with his opera and theatre rehearsals.

“Yeah,” Junpei blinked, pensive, and she braced herself for another odd comment of his. “I was thinking…”

I had no doubt you were, She rolled her eyes with affection and waited for him to continue. She allowed a part of her to begin growing a pinch of expectation making her hold onto his arm more tightly.

“I was thinking something is missing but I don’t know what it is.”

Her heart skipped a beat, her free hand flying onto her trembling chest as she pressed her lips: could he be…?

Trusting that unreasonable hunch, she pressed slightly more, searching for a safe icy ground to walk on.

“Cos’è?” She chanted in his flushing ear. “What is it?”

“Un soave non so che,” He quoted some aria he was the only one between them knowing. His chocolate-coloured eyes increasingly grew dreamy at her teasing getting imprisoned in his melody, until he tensed. “Oh! I know! Maybe we need a fireplace.”

“A fireplace?” Her crescendo sagged immediately along with her receding smirk.

“Yes, a fireplace!” He exclaimed and proceeded to create confusing patterns with his hands, adapting them to different poses and angulations. “I think it would fit below the television. If we had one down there, we would get a lot of warmth from the fire. At the same time, we would still be far enough from it, though, and the heat wouldn’t bother us that much. Trust me, I’ve dealt with fireplaces since I was a kid. If fire gets too hot, you will get a headache and feverish cheeks. The same will happen to you if you stay too near to it while relaxing.”

“You need balance, right?” He snatched a smile to her despite how disgruntled that unexpected turn was making her feel. His explanation was strongly reminding her of a moment they had shared in Digiworld: both sitting in front of a bonfire, her listening to a collected Junpei speaking about a philosophical concept and losing himself in metaphors and instances.

“You always need balance. This is…The only good thing my father has ever taught me, I suppose,” He grinned, focusing his attention on her again. “You know, sometimes I like thinking about us doing the most disparate stuff together and I love realizing I wouldn’t really want anything else from my life because I’ve got the balanced family I didn’t know I needed. We compliment each other, right? And no, I’m not only talking about you cooking and me eating your delicacies…Or maybe that’s another way we reach our balance, hm?”

Silence fell on them. Izumi frowned, unfortunately unable to express her gratitude because of so many doubts crowding her mind and overlapping with those already existing.

“Izumi? Have I said something wrong?”

…

She wanted that. He didn’t want that, apparently, at least, or ,perhaps, that impression was just a way to mock herself in an illusion about something she cared about and really wished for.

Lying her heavy spheres on the tidy details of the living room, she convinced herself a similar development would predictably turn that place in a mess, and she would have never liked to assist to a hurricane conquering that place. But again, they had bought such a huge house with some areas they still needed to organize and they weren’t really going to transform each of them in guest rooms, right?

Sucked in her world, she got startled when Junpei deeply inhaled and parted from her, making her feel cold because , right in that instant, she had started wondering what that house would look and feel like, completed yet without Junpei around. It would feel as empty as it used to be at the beginning of that adventure of theirs.

She observed his face warping in a very hilarious way, his cheeks bloating like a hamster’s and his lips slightly puckered. Then, he turned to her with comically-enlarged eyes.

“J-Junpei?”

“If you want to say something, say it and clearly!” He playfully scolded her and imitated one of those pretty exasperated sentences she had often shouted at him, back when they were younger and he just used to be a dude hopelessly chasing the girl he had loved for ages.

Izumi exploded in a laughter.

“You’re so right. I should be honest and tell you, even if I don’t know how to do that, for some reason”.

“Just do that. Then we’ll deal with what will come next.”

She stared at him for some seconds even if she didn’t really intend to, but she was really glad her pupils had ended up on his serene traits. What was the worst that could have happened to her? Surely, they would have remained together even if his reply wouldn’t have met her expectations: that was what mattered the most to her, after all.

She searched for a contact with his hand as she brought herself to overcome her nonsense, -in her opinion-, fears. Successively, like she would always do, she started a serious conversation with a question.

“Junpei,” She began. “Do you think that balance you have found in our life could be compromised if…If…Well, if we welcomed someone else in our family?”

“Someone else? Eh, I knew it, Izumi!”

Her green irises widened at his malicious snigger.

“Oh c’mon, Cara, you’re talking to the infallible Detective Shibayama. This is too easy! Let’s begin saying you were the one asking me not to send that little prankster away from the restaurant some days ago. Yesterday you asked me to cut that cod for her. I gave her some pieces but you begged me to give her the whole fish. And I’m your husband before being the great Detective Shibayama…I do notice when something makes your beautiful eyes shine the brightest.”

He was referring to a little stray cat that had showed up at the entrance of the restaurant from nowhere, meowing desperately until someone, who had happened to be Junpei, had opened the door. He would have taken the cat away from the restaurant if Izumi hadn’t dashed outside to check who Junpei was talking to. She couldn’t deny she was the cutest cat she had ever seen in her life and she had unavoidably fallen with those big light yellow orbs the creature curiously looked at butterflies with.

But this isn’t what I wanted to talk about!, She attempted to keep herself from getting way too distracted, but he continued talking about that matter, for her dismay.

“-And I did see you bringing those blankets outside yesterday night. I saw them before I came searching for you with the little boy.“

Izumi blinked at him. She blinked at him again, and then again and again.

“Hey, I’m not against getting a pet,” He reassured her, feeling like his confession had inhibited her. “After all, I’m always forced to leave you alone and…A pet could keep you company when I’m not around. I did play with the idea to get you a poodle once, because you do remind me of those…”

Izumi threw him a friendly fist on his belly muttering one of her “What in the world are you saying, you idiot!”. Nevertheless, she soon, too soon, quieted down, just like he did to mimick her mood, so puzzled.

“Hey, if you don’t want a poddle for Christmas and you want that cat so badly, it is fine. It was just a silly proposal.”

“Now you’re making me realize I would like that cat too,” She huffed. “Uffa, Junpei, it’s not fair. You’ve managed to make me change topic again!”

“Have I ?”

“Yes and…It was already so hard for me to talk about that, like I’ve already said,” She abandoned her weight against the backrest. The breaths that splayed her lips didn’t help her feel lighter about the circumstances, especially now that there was a beautiful grey tuft scampering after gusts of wind in her mind. Perhaps, that was a signal she had to resign to her failure. That day, at least. She could have tried again in the future, a future in which they would already own a cat she could have cuddled as much as she wanted…And held…And taken care of…Someone she could have given the whole love of the world to.

Uh…

“Okay, something tells me I’ve barked up the wrong tree, haven’t I ?”

She bended her head with mechanical movements and gave him an inquisite glance.

“I might have jumped to a hasty conclusion if that cat wasn’t what you wanted to talk about.”

Her mouth stretched on its own, wiping that crumb of melancholy that had fallen on its corner.

“Even the greatest Detective can fail,” She mocked him and that big grimace that had just appeared below his ashamed eyes.

“I suppose….”

She slipped closer to him again and they soon found themselves in the position they had left a while before, but this time there were many more question marks hovering above them. Furthermore, Junpei seemed to have perceived a different aura coming from the way she was resting by his side: he probably could feel her curled frame pushing against his sitting one with more intensity, as if she wanted them to melt in a much more intimate hug.

“Should I get worried?” He asked her with a wisp of voice. “You don’t look angry, though, which is good. When you are angry at me, your eyebrows seem to twich, you can’t help clenching your fists and jaw, you glare at me like if you’re about to evoke Trieste’s bora and turn it against me. You become scary. So. Scary. Anyway, this means my clownery at the restaurant from yesterday hasn’t annoyed you that much.”

She would have liked to ask him if it was true she would transform so dramatically whenever she got mad, but his last observation got the priority over anything else.

“I can’t deny your clownery at the restaurant does make me sweat. And a lot. But you make so many people smil-“

“What a relief,” He cut her short, so content. “Then, let me tell you this: if I had more time, much more time to stay at the restaurant, I would even set up spectacles for kids, with cards, flowers, motley handkerchiefs, a top hat and, why not, marionette too. And if I wasn’t so busy sometimes I often risk to even forget about my birthday, if I wasn’t so tense and terrorized whenever we…”

“Junpei?” She grew a bit concerned about the blatant sadness that was darknening his joy. What in the world could have turned him off so unpleasantly? Another proof she should have never ventured in that conversation that day, also because they were clearly exhausted. What they needed was their comfortable bed and not that demanding discussion for sure!

Then, he picked something from his pocket and he examined that object with a longing stare. Her ear resting on his shoulder let her acknowledge the more powerful beats pulsing in his veins and making her slightly swing up and down.

“If you ask me, there’s something missing. Definitely. But it’s not a fireplace, I guess,” He made the item spin in his skilled hands, which were showing to know how to deal with certain objects with a delicacy you wouldn’t expect on him. “I might have got confused because it’s warmth what I wish for, but it’s not that kind of warmth you get from a fireplace, perhaps? Dio mio, what the hell am I talking about? I sound so cringe.” He put the object on the short table and crossed his arms. He was wearing a very evident pout, but not one of those conveying irritation or disgust. It was more like if he was upset and very confused. “Sometimes, just sometimes,” His words amalgamated with his shaky breath. “I let myself think because it would be nice, heck if it would be nice. But I end up biting my tongue everytime it happens”.

Izumi felt overwhelmed by that quite unexpected development and would have liked to swear at that knot in her throat taking shape in there again. Nevertheless, luckily, Junpei interpretated her silence as an invitation to keep on going and opening himself, something he had improved at but also an event that was still so rare.

“Whenever we call each other and you tell me how much you miss me, I allow myself to imagine things”.

“Things,” Hers wasn’t a question without intonation. If only Junpei could have read her thoughts, he would have known how many meanings those things had to the chords of heart.

“Yes, kind of things that make me smile. I don’t want to imply you can’t take care of yourself, because I’m aware you are the bravest and best woman in this world, I am! I’m not talking about something like that. It’s just that we’ve been lonely since we were children and I feel like we’re constantly searching for warmth and light in our life, especially when we are not physically together. I could get them from a fireplace, but how would I get those when I’m far from you and I’m aware you’re all alone here?”

He stared at the floor and the abandoned pillows while she looked at him, feeling like she had fallen in some sort of déjà vu someone was enjoying editing the way they pleased. At the beginning, for a considerable amount of time, she just wanted to pronounce his name and repeat it over again and again. He had always claimed to be someone not being that good at dealing with words, those words he didn’t have to learnt at heart, at least. On the contrary, she had always believed he knew how to pick the simplest yet most effective phrases to easily access to her soul. In the past, she would often hide those emotions from him and the world, but now she had learnt to welcome them, not caring if they would make her so tacit for what felt like ages.

“So,” She said when she felt ready enough to face him again. She chuckled at his flushed cheeks, not realizing hers didn’t look that different. Indeed, hers’ round surfaces were also so humid and those drops on them were shining thanks to the rays of that budding Sun, getting higher and higher in the sky. “You do want something else from life, after all.”

He softly gasped, his lips trembling as he raised his head to her, his orbs getting more and more lucid.

“Yes,” He told her with a sniff. “I want that fondant au chocolat you didn’t allow me to eat yesterday.”

She fiddled with the point of his nose, pressing it with her index. She slowly made that finger slide on a cheek of his and rubbed that spot with it. “Only if you get me that cat before that.”

XXX

In a certain sense, she was satisfied about the fact their serious discussion had eventually dived in a bowl of chocolate, had sneaked into an oven and had taken the shape of a couple of cute flans.

They weren’t really people who adored living in a frozen atmosphere where darkness and cold ruled. Like Junpei had reminded her, they had always been creatures of light and fire.

And ,most of all, they didn’t really like making plans. Junpei used to adore scheduling whatever he wanted to do on a trip or during holidays, but she had recently got the impression he had learnt to follow the wind just like her. She wasn’t sure what that could mean about the future of their family, but she was certain she would have understood it when the right time came.

Finally tucked under their blankets, she heard the sound of the fabric below her stretching and pulling under a stirring Junpei.

“I was thinking…”

There was she, rolling her eyes again and pouring every gram of affection she owned in that small gesture.

“Let me guess. You want to project a new bed that doesn’t creak so hard when you move.”

“Ah, this is really good, Izumi! A bed completely made of steel wouldn’t be that comfortable. It would kill my back. No way,” He got even closer to her by rolling on himself. Now less than a centimeter was separating them and the scent of chocolate mixed with the one of toothpaste penetrated in each other’s nostrils.

“I was thinking…”

“Be quick. I want you to have a good nap, so you will be prepared to get me that cat tonight.”

“Right. Right. But, hey, listen: you asked me if a…If a…If a baby…”

Both gulped at that row of letters occupying that space left between them. Izumi told herself the shadowed room wasn’t dominated by a faint black anymore, but was taking life through streaks of colours twirling over their bed.

“A b-baby…?”

“If a b-baby could break that balance we’ve found as husband and wife.”

Right: she had asked him that, but she wasn’t certain whether it was still that important to her to get a reply. Even so, she encouraged him to continue and she raised an eyebrow when he addressed his odd wince at the ceiling.

“I mean, Cara, if we are still so tied to the elements we were given in Digiworld in some way, wouldn’t she be a little tempest? Beautiful, yes, immensely beautiful like you, an Ophanimon on Earth, but still a little thunderstorm. She would obviously break our balance, but not only that.”

“Didn’t I tell you to sleep?!”

Izumi pushed him away with her whole strength, concealing another emotional attack that had suddenly taken over her.

The breeze she had breathed in the night before gently slipped in their bedroom, bringing along variegated shades of pink and reflecting in those liquid crystals bathing her eyelids.

Afterwards, she pouted, though, and the turn to roll on herself in Junpei’s direction arrived.

“Hey,” She nudged him, sounding as irritated as possible with her hiss. “You are already showing gender preferences, aren’t you?”

But wasn’t she unconsciously doing the same ?

That puffy baby with that familiar spiky hair she found herself holding in her dream had visited her in her slumber just because she had fallen asleep on Junpei, right?

XXX

{ • “Un soave non so che” (A sweet something / literally: A sweet something I don’t know) is a quote from Rossini’s Cenerentola (Act I).

• Trieste is a city in Friuli Venezia Giulia, in the North East of Italy. Bora is the strongest wind blowing in Italy, which is typical from there. }

[goldislops]

Why People Procrastinate, and How to Overcome It

To stop putting off tasks, think about the positive

High angle view tired businesswoman with hands behind head working at desk with a laptop, papers, and open books

Amr Bo Shanab/Getty Images

To stop putting off tasks, think about the positive

By April 12, 2024—three days before the deadline for filing tax returns in the U.S.—more than a quarter of American taxpayers had yet to do so. Procrastination—delaying something despite an awareness of associated negative consequences, leading to discomfort—is a common experience for many. Unfortunately procrastination tends to carry significant costs. For instance, completing a task when rushing to finish can impact the quality of one’s work. Moreover procrastination is by its very definition stressful, and naturally such stress can take its toll. Chronic procrastinators tend to report more symptoms of illness, more visits to the doctor, lower overall well-being and even greater financial struggles.

So if procrastination is so costly, why do so many people regularly do it? Years of research have provided a reasonably comprehensive list of psychological factors that relate to procrastination. But it’s been unclear what mental processes underlie the decision to start or postpone a task. When faced with an upcoming deadline, how do people decide to initiate a chore or project?

To shed light on this question, we conducted a series of studies examining task delay, the behavioral component of procrastination in which people put off completing something despite lacking any objectively strategic reason to do so. We found that people with a negativity bias tend to delay tasks more, especially if they tend to be poor at self-control.

[areumchelle]

👩‍🏫 Run into the World of a Student pursuing an English Major👩‍🏫

Being a teacher is difficult because tons of school papers are being done not only in the classroom but also in their houses, and I'm fully aware of that since our family course is teacher.

Flashback 🕰️

I was in junior high back then when I decided that I would take tourism as my course, but unfortunately, my parents declined due to the fact that it was out of budget and would take time to pursue. I was unhappy until my aunt and her daughter, who was a teacher, told me that there's a huge advantage and benefit teachers have, which led me to decide that I would take education as my course. I then took English as my major because this is one of my weaknesses, and I want to enhance it so that I can work abroad, which is somehow connected to what I really want, which is to work in my dream place, South Korea.

My first year seems unreal. My journey finally starts, and as it begins, I'm a bit struggling with what I should do and how I can improve myself, especially since I'm new to this world. English was my weakness back when I was in high school, and as I'm pursuing English as my major, it makes me nervous since I'm afraid of public speaking. I later began to question my decisions, like, Does this course fit me? Is this what I really want? and many more. Even though I'm lacking and still coping, I didn't give up and still did my best in this course. Late night snack, or what I must call late night dinner, due to the deadlines I must finish, breakdowns that I always feel every time that I question myself, sleepiness nights, and improper bed routine, and these are the things that I experienced during my first year, but as I always do, everything happens for a reason, and I always pray to God that I will overcome these years without fear of failure. I didn't have friends when I was in 1st year since we were conducting our classes online, but I still have contacts and am chatting with some of my classmates to avoid being an outcast when face-to-face classes occur. One thing that I will not forget about when I was in my first year of college is the challenges that I thought I would not overcome, but God is good because all of my hard work and struggles paid off, and that concludes my first-year journey.

The new learning modality came when I was in my 2nd year of college, wherein we do classes in both online settings and face-to-face gatherings. The 2nd year for me is the happiest college year of my life, wherein I met my true friends and was also able to get familiar with as well as socialize with my other classmates that I've never met and talked back to when I was in my 1st year. It was fun, memorable, and full of obstacles. During this year, I first experienced crying over grades that I didn't deserve, but of course I looked at that as a positive thing and believed that grades don't define who I really am. My 2nd year is indeed the happiest year, but also the hardest year at all. I experience a lot, like no dinner at all, because of the deadliest deadlines I must finish within that day; I also experience being awake for 24 hours just to finish a video presentation; and lastly, I was sadly under a lot of pressure from my family and also scared to fail them. I thought back then that I wouldn't be able to come through and pass my second year, but I was wrong because I was recognized as a lister in both semesters. The lesson I've learned in my second year is that every challenge has its equivalent outcome. Yes,  it seems hard at first, but trust the process, and you won't think that you've finally overcome it. 2nd year is something I would treasure in my life because in here I learned a lot that helped and became me nowadays.

Time flies so fast, and now I can't believe that I was in my third year of college. All of my relatives and acquaintances say that the 3rd year is the hardest year of all in college, and I don't believe that until I experience it for myself. It feels suffocating and bombarding now that I'm in my 3rd year, wherein simultaneously deadlines, back-to-back reporting, research, and all of the other things I must accomplish to get a passing grade. I was in the first semester of the 3rd year, but it seems that I was in the 4th year because of the much more pressure from my family and aunt because they already know that I have a boyfriend. I always think positively every time I feel suffocated, and I think positively every time I am at the lowest point of my life. 3rd year is the hardest year, but I can say that this year is also the important year wherein you will learn a lot that will help me when I become a teacher. I was now more than half way to the finish line, and giving up is not my vocabulary anymore; crying is only the one that will help me to be better, and being positive as well as being with God are my partners at all times. Still far from what I should become, with more improvement and more pressure to come with all of my learning, I will be successful one day.

Experience, pressure, and struggles are the one that will mold me, and through these, I know that I will become a good teacher and will help the students one day.

"PADAYON FUTURE EDUCATORS"

[nobodieshero-main]

okay so i've finally finished the part where ahuru convinces keika to help atlas and stuff and i dont really know if it's like. paced right?? i wanted it to be a Struggle but i also didn't want to drag it out

His impromptu vow of silence splintered like thin ice, and he rounded on her, for lack of a better target. The container met the bench with a crack that might have broken the clay, had Keika not already reinforced his crockery with magic. 

“Why?”

Rather than flinching, Ahuru only rolled her eyes. His temper had never meant anything to her. 

“Because people only end up in this town when they’re desperate, but no one is ever desperate enough to come looking.” She reasoned, stepping forward. “I don’t know their reasons for wanting to get to those woods, but it has to be important right? They had to have travelled far to find us, and long enough to go following ghosts to a town that shouldn’t exist.” 

"Why don't you take them? Why does it have to be me?" He tried, suddenly aware of the way he was losing control of the conversation, his stubborn refusal smothered by his sisters steady logic. 

Despite a childhood of adventure and accidental trouble-making, Ahuru would never attempt to convince him of something unless she was sure it was worth it.

Keika just… he hated not knowing. The uncertainty about why Toa had sent them away, and whether she'd welcome either of them back, itched like dirt under his sleeves.

He wasn't sure he could trust his sister about this.

His sister who sniffed primly, and offered “Because I have a shop to run,” as her excuse.

Keika warbled in disbelief, eyebrows pulling down as Ahuru shrugged. 

“Well I have a library to run.” He challenged, aware that he’d lost the battle but not quite willing to stop fighting just yet. 

“The library can take care of itself.” 

She wasn’t wrong, unfortunately. 

“You only have to take them as far as the river.” She promised.

And Keika would keep saying no, would tell her to go to her own house and watch the travellers leave in the morning but… he remembered being 5 and sitting on wooden steps and feeling the not-so-gentle tugs of Ahuru braiding feathers into his hair. Remembered an 11 year old Ahuru stubbornly practising the common tongue so she could become the healer's apprentice because all she wanted to do was help people. 

Whatever these travellers wanted with the Mahina Woods wasn’t Keika’s problem, but Ahuru had made it hers and that… that kind of did make it Keika’s problem in a roundabout way. 

“Why are you pushing this so hard?” He asked again. “We don’t even know them.”

Ahuru tilted her head, looking out the window at the darkening streets. “I don’t know, it’s just a feeling I’ve got.”

Keika scoffed and finally began scooping tea leaves into two mugs, letting the steam from the kettle curl around his jaw and leave it damp and warm as he poured the hot water. 

“I’m not doing it.” He finally decided, ignoring the bristle of feathers in his periphery. 

After a long moment of silence, she sighed, wings drooping. "You're too stubborn for your own good," She said, tired. But she let the topic go, accepting her mug of tea with a quiet thank you before launching into a recount of her day.

Later, long after the sun had set and Ahuru had headed back to her roost, Keika found himself staring at the shadows of his ceiling, playing her words back in his head. 

You’re too stubborn, she had said, and she wasn’t wrong. It was, he could admit to himself, partially a matter of pride: he’d already said no, he couldn’t just take it back because Ahuru made a good argument. 

He just- he was an adult, he didn't have to do it just because his sister said.

He didn’t want to go.

He didn’t want to go all the way back to those trees, to the comfort of that never-ending night, just to be turned away at the shoreline, left to crawl back to his burrow reeking of a poison named nostalgia. How cruel could Ahuru be, to send him home knowing that he may not be welcome?

But Ahuru is the furthest thing from cruel, a voice whispered. Another truth.

Keika sighed from the very depths of his lungs until it trailed off into a groan and then slammed his pillow over his face in an attempt to smother himself. Maybe if he lost enough brain cells from a lack of oxygen he’d forget about the travellers entirely.

He clicked his tongue against his back teeth. Fuck.

[thelegendofhino]

While i do enjoy zelda games and zelda lore and whatnot i have only played 6 zelda games... i know there are a lot more than 6.

Obviously ive played breath of the wild and tears of the kingdom. I dont really know what made me want to play breath of the wild. It was very unlike other games id usually play. Especially since i tend to just play the same few games over and over again... but im glad i did, because i enjoyed it immensely, to the point where i played it twice, my first time being on the wiiu.

I think one of my earliest attempts of playing a zelda game that i can remember was wind waker on the gamecube. I never managed to beat it partly since the console was at my grandmothers house and partly because i got stuck at dragon roost island because something odd had happened with the collapsing stairs that i was unable to progress. I dont know if i had gotten actually softlocked or if it was just a skill issue on my part. I was kinda young at the time. I did end up playing and beating wind waker hd later on. Then i tried to play it again on the gamecube but for some reason i lost interest at the part where i had to find the iron boots to progress.

Ive played four swords adventure way too many times. More times than id care to admit. More times than i can count. For no reason other than it was the only zelda game we had for a while and i just loved playing the gamecube and it was not a very difficult game (there was one time when i was younger i did get stuck on one level for. Possibly hours, driving my parents insane because i just kept going back and forth trying to figure it out) and it was just a fun game. As much as ive played it i absolutely would not consider it my favorite zelda game. Its a fun game but its also boring at the same time. Probably just because ive already played it so many times.

Ive attempted minish cap twice and beat it once. My first attempt i couldnt figure out how to beat vaati, but in my defense, everything else in the game with singular eyes youre supposed to shoot them with arrows. So naturally i never once thought to swing my sword at vaati because he is just eyes. And eyes = arrows. And it just never occured to me to try and hit him normally until i replayed it earlier this year. Other than that, its a fun game, and i love how it looks.

I played links awakening dx. I dont remember much about that game actually. I enjoyed it. It looked cute. I had no means of playing the original. Thats all i have to say about it.

Now. Those are games that ive finished a playthrough of. Ive also attempted twilight princess. Unfortunately i attempted it right after having played botw for a while, so i had to get unused to being able to climb things. And... embarrassingly enough, i got stuck at the very first temple of the game where you get the boomerang. I just couldnt figure out where to go. And being very aware that this was so early in the game and i already got stuck did make me feel discouraged. Not that i thought the game was too hard, but that i shouldnt be struggling as much as i did... nobody was watching me play but i was still embarrassed anyway. So, perhaps in the future ill give it another shot.

Now i am playing ocarina of time and will hopefully play through majoras mask. I have a feeling i may not end up ever beating majoras mask, but... i will at least try.

[headcanonrepository]

Thoughts on Final Fantasy XII

I've been replaying Final Fantasy XII lately. I say replaying - I never actually finished it the first time around, yet have proudly denounced it as my least favourite entry in the series for years. But I decided that to be fair to that, I should actually finish the game, so I picked up Zodiac Age for cheap with the idea that I can show my wife exactly why I rate it so little. Definitely a 'get drunk and bitch about it' kind of idea. (So uh, sorry if this is your favourite game, but this is a pretty negative post, just FYI)

My original criticisms still hold up, for the most part. Vaan makes no sense as the main character - aside from stealing the first stone at the beginning of the game, his impact on the actual plot is nonexistent. The plot is something that happens around him, not something he drives and impacts. In fact, apart from Ashe and Balthier, it's really difficult to justify anyone's connection to the plot.

Compounding this is that no one ever really talks to each other or comments on the situations they are in. There are a few cutscenes, brief and far between, but for the most part, there's an immediate 'what next?' after every section that just serves to point the player in the right direction. We learn next to nothing about who the characters are as people - what do they think? What are they passionate about? What do they hate? We just don't know.

While I'm ragging on the plot: it's a dense opening with many kingdoms named, important leaders, and characters, all before you take control of a single one of them. It's a struggle to remember so many plot points introduced so rapidly, let alone care about them. The density of information continues throughout, where you are expected to remember who is part of which kingdom, who is an ally and who is foe and how different people's agendas are playing out from one scene to the next. It feels a lot like the prequel trilogy of Star Wars - lots of information introduced relatively quickly and without spending a lot of time memorising it, working out how and why things are happening is borderline impossible. I had a similar critique of the prequel SW movies: good plot and ideas, terrible execution. Unfortunately, FFXII doesn't have a whole miniseries to help the player comprehend the politics of Ivalice.

I really disliked the Gambit system the first time I played. It felt very much like getting the game to play itself and if that's the case, why am I playing a game? I'm just running from fight to fight. I appreciate it a little more now - mostly because I am a tired adult with limited game time so automatic fighting for 99% of the time combined with 2x speed (which honestly the original game should have had, it's been permanently on throughout this playthrough) makes it more palatable to grind and get through some of the longer travelling sections of the map. I also think it's partly because my expectation has shifted from 'strategy is what I choose to do in a fight' to 'strategy is how I prepare for the fight' - I was already aware of the gambit system and how to make it work so I could start having fun with trying new things.

However, the descriptions for some techniques are just ludicrous. The in-game text for Traveller lead me to assume that it gets stronger based on the total amounts of steps you've taken in the game (and similarly Horology for time spent in game). The wiki dispelled that illusion and confirmed that both attacks were pretty much useless unless you were micromanaging to a degree that I am simply not willing to do. Lots of the gameplay information is similarly vague and unhelpful. I feel like the only reason I understand what I'm doing is because I have played other Final Fantasy games (so I already know what the spells are supposed to do) or other RPGs (so I can guess that equipment will behave in a particular way or puzzles will react in a certain way). Even then, I've had to search for the odd solution (wait, you mean I have to summon the guy to open the door, not just touch it with the person who can summon him?).

The hunt sidequests are just tedious. There’s no need to pick up a hunt, then confirm with a separate NPC that you’ve accepted the hunt, then go to a third location to find the hunt (often with a stipulation that the mark can only be found when the weather is just right, which is largely random and results in you loading and unloading an area repeatedly to get the conditions right) and then go back to that NPC to claim the reward. Especially when none of those objectives are ever marked on your main map, and you can only access a reminder by opening up the main menu, selecting the clan primer, selecting hunts, scrolling through every hunt you’ve ever accepted (even completed ones) to find the current hunt, to see a description and on one very particular screen, you can open a map that has the hunt’s current objective marked. Unless it’s a hunt where it just gives a vague location for you to search. Those exist, too.

Speaking of tedious, the Great Crystal was a section designed to force you to use a guide. Prima must have bribed them for that, because I swear that place is impossible to navigate without a VERY detailed map - no ingame map, switches to open doors (on a timer) and multiple doors per switch that can actually wind up blocking access to areas later, so you have to retread old areas to reactivate the switch and open the right door (still on a timer) and do this while running past enemies and hopefully going the right direction, with no real visual clues or references? Either you grew up playing old school dungeon crawlers and you’ve drawn your own map, or you’ve bought a guide. Or googled, but back in 2006, you probably didn’t have ready access to the internet while you were playing.

On a really annoying ‘we want you to buy a guide’ note for me - Libra seems mostly useless as a skill. It allows you to see enemy data and traps in the world, which would be useful, except there’s a large swathe of enemies that are unreadable. Those would be the bosses and hunts - the powerful enemies you are most likely to want extra information on. Given that you have used resources to both learn and acquire the skill, plus the resource of time in the field to use it, it is really frustrating that it’s so useless when you really want it, and I can’t see a compelling gameplay reason for it except forcing you to use an external guide. Given that a large part of the combat is adjusting your strategy to suit the enemy you are facing, purposefully withholding the information is just forcing you to use trial and error or brute force. Or a guide.

The game thinks it's better at writing ye olde English than it is. I'm willing to chalk it up as difficulties in translation, but most of the dialogue is very stilted and formal regardless of who is speaking and what their actual background is. A third of the party are guttersnipe orphans, a third of the party are pirates and a third of the party are used to royal formalities - they should not all have the same vocabulary and manner of speaking. Similarly, the voice acting has some very weak moments that I absolutely chalk up to localisation difficulties - voice actors have to fit the dialogue to mouth flaps rather than the other way around, and they have some awful dialogue choices to work with, especially in fast-paced cutscenes.

Also, there are so many different non-human races and different human cultural backgrounds - which I love in theory - but they don't really explore anything in great detail. Either the beast races like Garrif and Viera don't want contact with humans and so give very minimal details on their culture and way of life, or they are like the Seeq and Bangaa - they integrate with humans so well that they might as well have been a human in a costume. Even the humans from vastly different places seem to not have any major differences between their ways of life, which considering a large motivation of the plot is war, you would think to see some kind of resistance or protest purely against losing their heritage or way or life. As it is, an NPC in Rabanastre is largely the same as an NPC in Archades.

There’s some really cool aesthetics in the background of Final Fantasy XII that were probably a result of Star Wars (personal hover-transports that absolutely aren’t speeders, the vehicles in Archades that don’t look at all like Coruscant or the huge dogfights between airships that definitely aren’t an action sequence from any movie franchise we can think of, no way…) but otherwise inaccessible to us as the player. Oh, you wanted control of a speeder? How about a chocobo? An airship? Uh, you can get one sometimes, if we want you to, but you don’t get to drive, and most of the time, you’re on foot, bucko. I’m not saying a little speeder chase section would have made the game amazing, but it would have been cool as all hell if we had something like the motorcycle chase sequence from FFVII to break the game up a little bit, you know?

Despite all this, I did have some kind of fun with the game. But it's definitely one where I'm brought my own fun. Like trying to work out how I would rewrite the script to make it more compelling. There are definitely seeds of something interesting, just never really explored.

Things I actually liked, in no specific order:

Balthier and Fran’s whole dynamic. I really like shady duos who have shared history, with the man as the brains and the woman as the brawn of the operation. Optional points for the woman being athletic, agile, and a woman of few words. If I had a nickle for every duo who met this standard…well, I’d have two nickles, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice. (see Roman and Neo from RWBY)

The fact that Vaan and Ashe didn’t wind up romantically entangled. Like, I was really worried that was going to be a thing. Especially as the game kept setting up ‘Ashe sees dead ex-husband’ followed immediately by ‘but anyway, here’s Vaan’. He is so young and childlike in comparison to the weight on Ashe’s shoulders, I was really squicked to think that this was a direction they might be going in.

The vierra in general - I just wish we had more of them and their culture. Just give me about 20 more cutscenes where I can appreciate tall bunny ladies who can step on me, please and thank you?

That’s about it. The team dynamic was underwhelming, to say the least, no one really bonded or connected with each other on-screen in any way the player could appreciate, they all just bounced around from plot point to plot point reacting (barely) to circumstances as they came up and never really had a proactive plan or goal.

If you did really like Final Fantasy XII, I'm actually really interested to hear why. If you read this and disagree, and want to point out things you really liked, please do. My opinion is not going to change, but it might help me appreciate an element of the game I had disregarded.

[heart-ur-art]

hello, out there ~

pls excuse my lack of pfp, header or anything of the like, i promise this is a blog by a human and not a bot account.

i don't remember when i made this blog, but i had originally created it with the intentions of not only trying to help other artists slow down and appreciate all the hard work they put into their creations since the surge of 'hustle culture' is forever prominent on social media platforms these days in order to have any hope of presence and consequently, i feel causing artists to feel less value in the work they accomplish, sadly, but to also help myself be more aware of and actually celebrate the advancement of my own skill and hard work that i put towards my art and hobbies.

unfortunately, as is quite apparent by this empty blog that's been floating around in my list of blogs for some time now, i think i've hit more of a wall in my creativity than was previously known.

i've always struggled a lot over the many years (probably close to around 15 now) that i actually have tried to actively improve my art skills to work towards specific goals in that i struggle in knowing exactly HOW to practice art, as far as good fundamental/foundational knowledge is concerned, but i also... pretty much only have WIPs and next to no finished pieces of art (and this is also true for many other hobbies i do; hardly anything ever gets finished).

it's incredibly demotivating and disheartening, especially with the new modern day expectation of artists (or creators of any kind, really) to churn out art as if they were machines and seeing people's quick improvements and new discoveries of skills. i constantly feel behind in the art world. and yes, i'm aware that it's not a requirement to put out art in this manner for hobbyist artists; slow artists are valid and can be very successful and fulfilled, too. but i think we've all felt the pressure to create more and more, faster and faster than before even if it's just for validation purposes.

and it's almost become a requirement if you wish to have any hope of obtaining any monetary compensation for your work (which, i have hoped to obtain even small scale as extra funds for years when i was abled enough to work, but even more so now that i find myself at a higher needs disabled status and unable to work + mostly home-bound and would like to sell my art skills for even a little bit of financial independence after being forced to move back in with my parents for unforeseen personal reasons). i think this is why i tend to find myself crawling back to sites where things WERE slower years ago when i first started to get into the art world.

as is also the motivation for wanting to create this blog. to encourage us all to remember, it's okay to take our time and experiment and learn at a pace that's enjoyable again and just share our achievements in pure enjoyment for creation and less for the sake of getting stuff out there as quick as possible or the first to jump on new trends/popular content for the numbers.

so i guess we start here. in a position of where i find myself unable to create despite.. wanting to on an almost daily basis.

im often wondering how so many people ARE able to create daily, how do they stay motivated and focused? what keeps them inspired to always have ideas to put down on canvas?

this is especially the case for anyone who is of any neurodivergencies that affect energy, focus and motivation and are able to create consistently because this is seeming to be a very significant struggle with myself (i'm assuming has always been but have only more recently discovered that i'm VERY much ND) as of late.

i'm certain i'm not the only person out there feeling this exact same way or very similarly. so, please, i invite anyone interested in taking a breather away from social platform expectations and growing more peacefully in skill to join me in trying to discover how to achieve this.. together.

i can't say for sure what exactly i have planned for this blog and how we can all come together to bring more genuine joy back to creating, as i often have many ideas, but i tend to be quite lost as to how to follow through with them. maybe we'll figure it out along the way.

anyone of any skill level and any medium of art is welcome to join. (i will say up front, i do not consider any ai made anything to be a self-made art-form as it is imitating works of real human artists, so that is not an acceptable 'medium' here. you're welcome to pick up a pencil, stylus, brush, sculpting material, whatever if you'd like to actually participate and learn a skill from this space)

i suppose what i'm asking of this first post is.. how is it that YOU create? how or what do you do for practicing or warm-ups? what do you do on days where there's less focus or motivation for drawing or creating? what inspires your work?

very interested in others' creative process, and please those who deal with road blocks from neurodivergent disorders, lemme know how you work around them in order to do what you do ~

feel free to reblog this with commentary or tags explaining, drop a comment on this post or i'll even open the ask box if preferred to respond that way (no anons for now; i've not had great experiences with anon asks in the past)

please remember to always be kind, to others and to yourself. wishing you happy creating ~