#and we all know it’s a massive angst fest | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

frostironfudge · 2 years ago

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Silhouettes In the Spotlight - Bucky Barnes - Fourteen

Summary: Bucky Barnes has worked immensely hard to have a filmography expanding across genres and garnering accolades from critics, peers and fans. Y/N Y/L/N, with her debut novel (fan-fiction turned New York Times Bestseller) has two other best sellers under her belt. Next is her highly anticipated fourth book lined up for release. SHEILD Productions has acquired the film rights to her debut novel and they want Bucky Barnes to play the lead (aka himself) by any means necessary. This story is about angst, lust, heartbreak, and love. After all fairytales only exist in books and movies right?

Warnings: fluff, angst, insulting language to the reader by a secondary character, alexander pierce is still a shit head he doesn't understand personal space, SA mentioned not described, drugs mentioned not consumed, entertainment industry language (basically misleading way of delivering news), slight amount of smut, dirty talking, legal stuff being spoken about, fbi workings. reader has alot of anxiety described through this chapter at various points.

Pairing: Actor!Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Fem!Reader

Word Count: 7.6k || Dividers: @firefly-graphics

Main Masterlist || Fic Masterlist || AO3 || Fic Playlist

Chapter Thirteen || Chapter Fifteen

HEADLINES:

Fan’s excitement for book announcement turns sour, watch Y/N Y/L/N Take Control Of The Situation, We Stan A Powerful Woman

Fans Praise Steve Rogers Standing Up For Y/N

Smouldering Hot Dolores Sets The Runway On Fire While Walking For Best Friend's Brand

Loki and Ace Are They A Thing? When Will They Admit To Their Hidden Romance?

Bucky Barnes and Y/N Share An Intimate Moment Amidst Chaos, Five Times These Two Were Bestie Goals.

Bucky watches from the sidelines of the lit fest. The auditorium brimmed with excitement. He wondered if this is how you felt during the cast reveal for your previous books. Pride weaves into his bones as you step out on stage, massive applause breaks out and he can’t help but wolf-whistle as well.

You’re his girl and he would be damned if he didn’t come out to support you. He has to bite his lip before he moans seeing your outfit, yet again. The way the suit pants cling to your ass has his own tightening.

Flashes of this morning coax his mind, your hands in his hair tugging him closer and pushing him away. The taste of you on his tongue. Fuck he needs to remain between your legs for days before he can satieate himself.

Your eyes find him just as he licks his bottom lip. Heat pools in your belly at the thought of Bucky on his knees, licking the remnants of you from his lips, his stubble glistening.

He smirks at you as he watches the slight shift in your demeanour. He knows you’re thinking about this morning as well.

“Oh my god.” He hears a voice exclaim, “That's! That's Bucky!”

He turns his head around, sure enough a few seats down they raise their phones for a picture.

“Hey could you hold off on posting that? I’m here to support her.” He calls over the voices that are slowly going down in decibel.

They nod he knows it's a long shot but he has to take it, today was about you. To an extent Steve as well, given he was on the panel from HYDRA’s Publication House too.

Steve walks out next waving at the crowd, the cheers are deafening, flashes of the cameras ensue. He comes over smiling and hugs you.

The host gestures for the two of you to take your seats.

Yelena sits next to Bucky, Angel next to her.

After what Bucky had said to Yelena she hadn’t spoken to him more than required. However she was speaking a little more to you, which he appreciated.

The crowd begins to settle into silence as the crew checks for the mics and hands one each to Steve and you.

“Welcome Everyone!” The host cheers, “I’m Peter Quill, your host for this fine evening in literature. Though as an entertainment presenter I may not be qualified.” The crowd laughs, Peter grins.

“Now I can, however, ask right off the bat if these two have been having fun filming, I Think I Met You In My Dreams Once.”

The crowd cheers again, Steve laughs and you chuckle. Both smiling at the crowd.

“Are you having fun on the film set? Ms. Executive Producer?” Steve teases, you roll your eyes at him.

“When you aren’t taking too long in hair and make up, yes.”

“Hey, I’ve got to look great to bring your character to life.” Steve defends, raising a brow in challenge.

“You’re right, Beck did have his hair blow dried and then a pommade made with more spray to hold.” Your deadpan delivery makes Bucky laugh, Steve always was the worst when it came to his meticulous hair process. No matter the role this was always the case.

Steve rolls his eyes, “It’s all good fun.” He says with a smile.

The two of you turn back to Peter.

“Now, Y/N we heard some news that you broke Steve’s heart.” Peter tilts his head and gives you a knowing look.

“Oh yeah, he’s upset that my new book doesn’t have a character inspired by him.” You explain.

“I don’t wike it.” Steve pouts like a kid, slapping his hand on his thigh.

“Oh you know what I meant you smart lady.” Peter points a finger between the two of you.

Steve shakes his head, “Honestly man, let it go. We’re here to talk about books.”

“Right, right.” Peter shuffles through the cue cards.

Steve looks at you, you smile at him. Then your gaze shifts to Bucky. He smiles at you. Seeing him there cheering you on makes you beam brighter. Happiness coursing through you at having a partner support your endeavours so wholeheartedly.

“So Steve, do you plan to return to writing? Maybe a joint venture?” Peter gives yet another speculative look.

“Hmm maybe I could, you never know I do have one more book in my contract. I wonder if a murder mystery would be fun. Would you all read it? Though I mean I’d have to ask our favourite author for tips.” Steve looks at you then at the crowd they cheer in agreement.

“Murder mystery and fun?” Peter shudders, “I don’t know why chicks dig that.”

“Are you critiquing reading preferences, Quill?” Steve tuts, “in a room full of readers and writers established and budding. Damn.”

You shake your head disappointed at the judgement rolling off in waves from Quill.

“Oh come on you gotta think it's a little messed up.” He defends.

A chorus of boos ring.

“Depends on what morals you follow.” You chuckle when you hear a hoot, “Morally grey tends to be a favourite colour.”

“Rhys Bass! Baby!!!” A person calls out and everyone cheers.

“Llyod Hansen!” Another person exclaims.

Steve laughs, “I wouldn’t know where to place Llyod.”

“Oh trust me, we do.” You answer on behalf of everyone.

Bucky chuckles, Yelena looks at him.

“Are you on the spectrum of morally dark colours?” She whispers.

“Don’t think I am.” He laughs again.

The interview goes on, the questions get directed more towards Steve. Quill shoots the random question to you but they aren’t about your book.

Bucky’s hands are tight fists on his knees. What kind of blatant disrespect was going on?

Yelena sighs disappointed at the yet again horrible question,

‘Did you write the books because you felt sad you never had a long term boyfriend?’

‘How are the sex scenes so vivid?’

Bucky’s texting Sam, he wants to know everything there is to know about Peter Quill.

“So Y/N, tell us, do you feel insecure about a woman like you being given such a huge platform for your book? I mean you clearly knew what would sell and from having a plus sized character to instead having smoking hot Dolores playing—,”

“I want to stop you right there.” You raise your hand to gesture Peter to shut the fuck up, “Your questions are highly disrespectful, yes multiple of them are disrespectful. Look around this room, genuinely, everyone here is from different backgrounds, cultures and sizes. You don’t get to sit there and make comments or assumptions based on how I look. Also, there is more to Dolores than her looks.”

“Now you’re being rude, sweetheart, I’m just asking you simple questions.” Peter chastises, “It should be easy to answer.”

Bucky stands up, “And you’re an absolute gaslighting fucker.” He calls out.

“Bucky Barnes?” Quill laughs, “Nice to see you man.”

You shake your head, Steve looks at you then Bucky, finally to you.

“Do you want to punch him or should I?” Steve rhetorically speaks while standing, rolling back his sleeves.

“No, actually none of it. Everyone, I'm terribly upset that this event probably didn’t go as you wanted. I had big news I wanted to share but it seems Peter Quill can’t leave his investigative, intrusive, entertainment roots. Anyways to save Peter the trouble—,”

“Y/N.” Gidieon Mallick walks on stage cutting you off.

You look at him.

“Mr. Quill, please leave the stage. You’ve done horribly and not followed our given cue cards at all. Blatantly, disrespected one of our most prestigious authors. Ms. Y/N please be assured that you will be receiving an apology from him. Everyone, we will be taking a short break.” He announces, gesturing with his palm he asks you and Steve to follow him.

The two of you follow and the crowd breaks out into chatter, Bucky, Yelena and Angel head out towards the two of you.

You’re biting on your tongue while Gideon reprimands the interns and Peter Quill.

Bucky catches the tail end of the conversation.

“Absolute fucking atrocity! How can you go off script??” His skin tinged red as his anger grew. Steve rolls his eyes, as if this wasn’t what they wanted. Drama for more clout.

“I really am sorry.” Peter looks at Steve and you.

“Save it.” Steve says, grabbing your hand and leading you to your group.

“So Bucky and Steve standing up for you is going viral already.” Angel informs you to look at her tiredly and then at the floor.

“Are they going to talk about the new book?” You ask, she nods.

“The buzz is being generated enough, I’m hoping we can have no advance reader copies and the only sneak peeks that come are from you.” Yelena adds, you look at Bucky.

His scowl is trained on Quill. You move towards him, reaching for his hand.

“James.”

He recognises your tone, wanting him to dismiss the matter.

“Feather.” He warns you as well.

“Please?” You look up at him with a small pout.

Bucky melts, rapidly the anger leaving him, “Fine.” He chuckles as you grin, having won your way.

“Come here.” He says, tugging on your arm and you’re pulled against his chest. His arms wrapped around you, your shoulders drooped. Home. He’s home.

“You’re home.” You mumble.

Bucky kisses the top of your head.

“As we have discussed and contemplated, we’re in agreement. An in-store release will ensure more buzz.” Gideon and his team are all smiles.

Yelena looks at you then back at them, “Perfect, we’re glad we’re able to work in a way that caters to both the teams.”

“It always is a pleasure working with you Miss Belova.” He moves his hand forward, she meets him halfway.

“And Ms. Y/L/N we are positive the book is going to be a hit, our editor had some concerns but with the way HYDRA is climbing upwards we know this will only take us further on success.

“I sure hope so.” You smile beaming brightly.

“Well printing is well underway so we should have you start signing within the month for in store copies—,”

A chorus of phones chiming around the room occurs. Everyone’s devices in their hands. An intern swiftly moves to switch the TV on, the news reports flooding in,

“In a shocking revelation done by Peter Quill of Entertainment Today, he has uncovered the ongoing affair between Alexander Pierce and Actress Dolores. Sources wonder is this why she stays on projects even due to her diva behaviour? There is a thirty year age gap between them fans suspect predatory behaviour and the grooming of Dolores done by the decorated producer and owner of HYDRA—,”

The picture flashes and you have to clutch your hands tightly. It reminds you all too well of your own experience.

“Switch to HYDRA.” Gideon sneers, the intern scrambles to switch.

“In a horrible breach of privacy, our esteemed leader Alexander Pierce was found consoling a distraught Dolores and this story is being turned and twisted by entertainment tid bit and disgraced reporter Peter Quill, who, if you remember insulted Steve Rogers and Author Y/N Y/L/N publically at the announcement of her highly anticipated fourth book.” Sharon shakes her head disgusted at everything.

“We have reached out to Mr. Pierce and Dolores to find out from the source the matter and set the record straight.” She adds, “For now I will allow my team to take over coverage of the forest fire crisis ongoing in Los Angeles.”

“See, nothing to be worried about.” Gideon smoothens his tie, giving a tight lipped smile.

You nod.

“I’m sure Mr. Pierce will explain.” Yelena adds.

Peter Quill stares at the cops parading around his home and then the small little white powder bag they somehow found inside his home. He was good with this, never letting the party boy side of him touch the limelight in which he shined and thrived.

Now he was sitting in a room in the police department. A camera in the corner turned off for privacy with his lawyer.

“Mr. Quill, you have a phone call.” His lawyer hands him his phone.

“Hello?” Peter greets.

“Mr. Quill, I suggest you heed this warning.”

His eyes wide, the caller’s voice easily recognised.

“I was doing my job.” He defends, “I was sent—,”

“Peter, save yourself some dignity, I know other things about you as well. We don’t want those coming to light do we?” Alexander chuckles.

“N-no.”

“Alright then, I’m sure your lawyer will be able to handle this matter. Consider this a final warning, Mr. Quill. I do not like my privacy invaded and after today I’m sure you will agree.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good boy.”

Peter hands the phone back to his lawyer as the line goes dead.

“I hope you recorded that.” Peter says, his lawyer smiles.

“I always do.”

The dominos begin to fall.

The first being Dolores and Alexander’s speculated affair. No matter how many times the two clarified the situation people wouldn’t let go.

Edits of fans and experts of body language labelling Alexander as a predator. Dolores the victim.

You swallow thickly as almost all of the signed on creatives of HYDRA were ushered into the auditorium housed within the headquarters.

The issue was rapidly evolving and frankly getting out of hand. Interviews being stopped in the middle asking how the best of advocated actors, actresses, directors and producers are associated with this kind of man.

All of your social media feeds were drowning under the comments, some very horribly rude and outright attacking you on a personal level.

“I told you not to read them.” Bucky chastises from next to you. You tuck away your phone.

“I can’t ignore it already. The whole mandate of saying nothing is annoying me, countless people want him to be taken down.” You complained to him.

“I know it’s bothering me as well.” He sighs, grasping your hand gently, you feel the soft ridges of the metal as he rubs soothing circles onto the back of your hand.

You stare at the limbs, just wanting to lift his hand and kiss it. Just to see the sweet flush that would coat his cheeks. Just to see that shy smile of his, just to admire him.

“We’re in public.” He warns, reading your mind, “As much as I love you doting on me, I don’t think SHIELD—HYDRA,” He corrects himself, “can tolerate another piece of drama.” He snorts.

“Careful what you wish for,” Steve exhales loudly as he sits next to you, “dogs are sniffing around for something that might break the internet further than the current scenario.”

You roll your eyes, “What are they going to do? Have them release more photos, of others?”

“Possibly.” Steve gives an apologetic smile, “Angel’s heard conversation that maybe they might pitch the three of us being a throuple.”

“The fuck?” Bucky says, you groan.

“I don’t think we can take that news down like that.” You defend.

“Well, think about it, over time speculation has happened.” Steve says you and Bucky exchange a glance.

“People ship the two of us.” Bucky adds sharing a look with Steve.

“Oh god.” You press your palms against your face.

“This is not what I envisioned happening when I wrote Stucky x reader.” You mumble prompting Bucky to laugh.

“I did like the werewolf one.” Steve praises, Bucky chuckles, nodding in agreement.

Your head snaps towards Steve then Bucky.

“You.” You glare at your boyfriend.

“In my defence, Steve asked me about it first which is why I had to read it.” Bucky raises his hands.

You turn to Steve, “You.” your tone is hopefully menacing.

“Sorry.” The blonde says very unapologetically.

The microphone feedback makes everyone look up at the stage, the three of you in the secluded corner watch on as the legal head of HYDRA, Schmidt is standing at the podium.

“As you are aware of the recent negative light shed upon Mr. Alexander Pierce, we ask you all to check your emails for the social media statement that will be issued from all of your accounts over the next twenty four hours.” He concludes, hand running over his tie.

“We assure you that no predatory or grooming behaviour was done by Mr. Pierce.” He declares, “As you know a man of his stature and power will be cursed by the media and preyed upon by women who want money. Ms. Dolores has set the record straight and all will be well again for us. I hope there are no questions that would like to be asked by all of you.”

The silence just continues on, no one dares to say anything.

“Alright then, you’re all dismissed please post the message on your socials. It is mandatory on your contracts.” Schmidt completes then walks off stage.

“Fucking hell.” Natasha’s voice has the three of you turn.

“Nat, pleasantly surprised you didn’t skip out.” Steve smiles at her, she rolls her eyes.

“Mandatory meetings are all the fun.” She says, her gaze shifts to you.

You offer a small smile, she looks back into her phone. Bucky’s hand rests on your shoulder to offer comfort.

You look down at your phone, reading over the generic statement that provides a stance while saying you take no stance.

“Miss Y/N?”

Four pairs of eyes fall upon the intern as they clutch their folder tighter. You offer a smile.

“Yes?”

“Mr. Pierce would like to see you in his office. I’m supposed to escort you there immediately.” They say, you nod.

You feel Bucky tense behind you. His hand moving protectively to your shoulder. You place your hand upon his, “It’s just a meeting, I’ll call you okay?”

You turn to meet his gaze, still unconvinced.

“James.”

“I’ll wait for you.” He declares.

“As will I.” Steve adds.

Gathering your bag, you step to the aisle. Natasha grabs your arm, turning you.

“Since when?” She questions, green eyes trained on you, observing every little flicker of emotion running over your face. Through the cracks of your poker face.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Natasha.” You reply cooly, gently prying your arm out of her grip.

“Y/N.” Her jaw tightens, eyes narrowing as she doesn’t buy your lie.

“Nat,” Bucky calls out, distracting her enough to allow you a moment to slip away.

“Bucky, you better tell me.” You catch her words, Bucky meets your eyes across the auditorium.

Asking for your approval to tell her, you watch as Steve shakes his head. You look at Bucky, he gives a subtle shake as well. They’re against telling her.

You shake your head as well, exiting the auditorium.

The lift’s music seldom distracts you from the increased pounding of your heart. Each beat echoing across your form. You grip the support bar. Perspiration coating your palms.

The intern regards you with worry, a tight-lipped smile doesn’t ease their concern. The ding announces your arrival to the floor. On cue your phone rings, discreetly you answer it from your watch.

Bucky’s with you, he’s with you.

Alexander’s assistant beams at you, heading to open the door. Heels clicking and adding to the dread flowing through your veins.

He must know your plan.

He must know what you’re trying to do.

Dolores probably is his pawn.

Another betrayal.

Another fucking disaster.

You’d lose everything.

You’d lose Bucky.

Your mind is the worst enemy and the best friend you could have.

“Ah, there you are, have a seat.” Alexander says from the desk he’s perched upon, facing the chair he requests you to take.

You sit, placing your bag down and turning your watch face inward.

“I read through the manuscript, I think we have a hit on our hands.” He grins.

You smile, “Thank you.”

“Though towards the end, I see you changed the original direction you wanted to take, why is that?” His fingers drum along the mahogany table.

“Did you not like it?” You ask, he leans in closer prompting you to shift back. He smirks, eyes tracing over you.

“You don’t have to be afraid of me, sweetheart. What happened that night, is just insurance against your thoughts of insubordination towards me. Even if you would never, the thought can taint your mind.” He raises his hand, fingers stroking your cheek.

You cower back further, fingers tightly gripping the handles of the chair.

“This is why I prefer Dolores, always so easy to manipulate and bend to my will and fancy. The mouth on her. Such a good little fuck. I wonder if you…” He hums.

“Please don’t.” You whimper.

You feel him draw closer, “I won’t, as long as you keep your damn mouth shut. Now your little book’s rights are going to be bought but I’m going to sell them for a profit after the launch.” He shifts away walking to the drink cart.

You watch him pour himself a drink.

“I’ll provide you with a percentage to take care of your mother. After all, we're a family here at HYDRA.” He grins, you nod, “How is she?”

“Doing better on the new medication regime.” You answer, his smile turns menacing.

“Good, you wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise that, would you?” He questions your integrity.

“I won’t let anything happen to HYDRA.” You say, it pleases him.

“Good, now run along. I’m eager to have you personally sign my copy once the printed books come out.” Alexander gestures with his hand for you to go out of the office.

You scramble away, only when the elevator doors close do you breathe easier as the floors increase between Alexander and you. The doors open at the parking level.

You’re tucked into the corner of the elevator.

Bucky stands there, gaze trained upon you as you stand supported by the railing. He steps onto the elevator.

Covering the distance to you, pulling you to his chest. Your hands move to wrap around his shoulders.

He sighs once you’re safe in his arms, with him. Gently he cradles your jaw, making you look up at him. Stroking your skin with his thumb. His lips press to your forehead. Then brush over your lips.

The doors open again,

“Holy fuck!” The camera flashes.

Bucky turns, lips no longer against your own he presses for the close door button but the paparazzi block it with their lenses and feet keep the doors pried open.

You grab onto his jacket to prevent him from lashing out at them. Your phone chimes. Bucky looks down at the screen as well.

From: A. Pierce

You two can’t keep a secret, allow me to tell the world on your behalf.

Unless you would prefer another few secrets revealed.

Bucky looks back at your face, your hands shake. He closes his eyes, this is not what he wanted. Not how he wanted to reveal to the world he was yours.

“Feather.” His voice anchors you over the increased roaring of the paps.

You look up, “James.”

Soft lips press to yours, you close your eyes, allowing Bucky to guide you. Your palm cupping his cheek.

You knew this kiss was his apology, his admission, his pain, his acceptance, his plea, his protection and his love.

Bucky hopes you feel all that he wants to say to you. He hopes he hasn’t disappointed you, he hopes you understand.

When you kiss him back, his shoulders sag with relief.

He turns you away from their prying eyes, shielding you with his body. The security finally pulls the paps back allowing the doors to close.

Bucky’s forehead rests against yours, you want to cry. This is not how the two of you envisioned the world knowing.

Another moment stolen away.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispers, you only hug him tighter, hiding away yourself against his chest.

Everyone on set regarded you differently. The crew whispered as the new couple passed by, Bucky holding your hand not letting go. He leads the two of you to the breakfast table.

Steve, Loki, and Ace are waiting for you at the table.

Natasha watched from afar, Maria shaking her head disappointedly.

“What?” Nat questioned.

“I hate when Alexander does this, uses the personal lives of people to his own gain.” Maria sighs.

“What do you mean?”

“The news with Dolores broke, I was with Alexander and Nick. Instead of trying to have things be smoother or address it. He wanted to know if anything was going on between them on set. Pulled information off of a crew member.” She explains.

Nat’s gaze moves to the two of you, you both had been careful. She made sure you would get moments tucked away with Bucky. The senior staff are bound by ironclad NDAs. Though Alexander could have pressured anyone.

The world hadn’t been kind. Questioning Bucky’s choice as well as your own.

Then they’d say it was perfect, a broken imperfect man with an imperfect broken woman.

Kind words lost amongst the sea of horrible words. So much so you had deleted the apps from your phone.

Bucky had hoped to spare you from this part of his life. He knew you could take negative reviews or critique for your books.

Over the past days he saw you reading everything discreetly. He wiped your tears, had you wipe his own.

You knew people could be horrible, you’d seen it. Now you were living it.

Reclusiveness had turned into a better option, words that you had learned to handle were overwhelming.

You missed interacting with fans, they supported you. Several supporting your relationship, defending it as well from the haters and trolls.

Sam wanted the two of you to issue statements or do an interview. Bucky was against it, the two of you were together, some would like it and several wouldn’t, he only cared about your wellbeing. If you wanted to speak to the world he would speak with you.

For now he was supporting you in the chaos to which you were newly introduced towards. The move had helped Alexander no longer an article floated about his pictures with Dolores.

“Imagine if it was the throuple thing?” Steve jokes, Loki glares at him.

“Then you two would have to take turns cheering me up.” You add, Bucky snorts.

“She’s making horny jokes, she’s really upset.” Ace remarks.

Loki shakes his head, “I thought horny jokes were her forte.”

“They are, dirty fucking mind.” Bucky chuckles, you poke his cheek.

“You love it.”

“I do.” He kisses your cheek.

“I’m happy though, you don’t have to shy away.” They grin, you smile.

“Yeah it has its perks, not hiding.” You shrug then look behind Ace at Nat.

“I want to speak to the two of you.” She says, “In private.”

Bucky shares a look with you, the two of you follow Nat to her trailer. She locks it, a determined expression on her face.

“Alexander was informed by a crew member about the two of you. I know we were discreet and we did everything we could to keep prying eyes away.” She states,

“I think it’s one of the core cast, Dolores yes but she already has everything on her plate. You two need to reevaluate the friendships forged.”

“Why are you worried?” Bucky raises a brow asking on your behalf, the two sisters had made their stances clear only wanting professional relationships with you.

Nat exhales, “For whatever reason, you both are withholding information from me. When I asked Yelena and she kept her mouth sealed shut too, I understood it ran deeper than a surface level issue.”

You seek out Bucky’s hand for comfort, his thumb strokes over your tattoo. He knew the action grounded you as well.

“I want to apologise for the way I’ve acted, pushing you away. Being rude and frankly the opposite of the friendship I found with you.” She shakes her head disappointed at herself.

“Nat…” you don’t know what to say to her.

“I’m not seeking instant forgiveness. I know it will take time to repair things. I just, I know how he can be and yet I thought you were after the money.”

You wince.

“I’m sorry, I really am, I just want to get to the bottom of who is behind telling Alexander.” She presses, watching as Bucky and you share another glance.

“Look it was bound to happen, and we already have a plan to smoke the leak out.” He grins, you giggle.

Natasha regards the two of you perplexed by the positive attitude, a stark contrast to the way the two of you have behaved over the past few days.

This was the next domino, have the public find out about the two of you. Dolores had been on your side, she wasn’t blabbing that much you knew, because the story was to be about the throuple with Steve and Bucky if it came from Dolores.

This much was sure that Alexander was being overly cautious. Which meant he would want to keep an eye on everything, which meant he would slip up.

“Well, if you need me to do anything, let me know.” She adds, you nod at her.

“I need you to continue being mean and reserved, I have to tell different people different things you said to us here.” You let her in on the plan.

“So just continue the way you are and we can always meet up privately.” Bucky shrugs at her.

“It's good seeing you this happy, Barnes.” She smiles at him, “You take care of her.”

“I’m trying every day.” His blue eyes gaze down at you, softening as he regards you being there in his life. Being his happiness, adding to it.

“You succeed everyday.” Your eyes find his warmth spreading through your chest at the love you feel just from his gaze.

“Alright then, now before the clothes come off, please leave.” Nat gestures to the two of you out the door.

“Bye, Natasha–,”

“Nat.” She corrects you trying to undo one step.

“Nat, I’ll see you on set.”

She smiles as do you.

—-div

“Alright, we’re going to move in on Pierce tomorrow.” Darcy informs the three of you.

“We want you all in a safer public space.” Scott adds, “I believe your book launch is placed appropriately?”

You nod, “It's in place.”

It had been almost a month and a half now since the book was cleared into printing. The movie schedule was constantly thrown off by Dolores to aid with the case’s timeline.

Prompting Natasha to keep asking you to step in over and over so they could shoot the opposite cast’s scenes.

The leak was in place tonight, the book had to tank. It was the only way you’d be able to free yourself.

Andy and Matt were working hard on finding loopholes for Bucky and Steve. Most of the ways out however involved paying their way out. Signing another set of contracts that cut off their ways of income and working in the industry.

“We have a lot of evidence against him, it will be a process to go through. Given his position and influence we anticipate a bail. However we anticipate travel restrictions so that he cannot flee the state or country.” Darcy takes a deep inhale then exhales slowly.

“We have one chance. One. Are you three sure you want to come forward with everything he’s put you through? There are other victims who have said yes and others who have said no. We will not force you, you need to make this decision on your own.” She waits, observing the three of you.

“I’ve been waiting a long time.” Dolores says, “I want him to rot and if he dies that's great too.”

“I’m in.” you answer. Everyone turns to the woman on the left.

“We’ll take him down.” Maria Hill promises.

The crowd is still there surprisingly despite the overnight leak. The night was filled with caffeine and chaos. A lot of people had downloaded the book based on the numbers Yelena had observed.

Social media was in an uproar. People who read the leaked version, divided in opinion. Goodreads was getting reviews based on the leaks and trying to disregard them or block those to stop prompting readers to be tempted to read the book.

Several accounts who made it their life’s mission to hate on you because Bucky was off the market were sharing download links to tank your ratings and for once you wanted them to not get blocked off.

The outfit for today was cream pants that hugged your curves, paired with a navy top which was low cut but in a way that gave nothing away. It was teasing enough for Bucky. You chuckle remembering his expression at the fitting.

Bucky stands before you with a small box in his hands. You raise a brow. It was five minutes till you had to go out to face the crowd at the bookstore signing.

“Just, I had this made as a ‘happy book launch day’ gift.” Bucky swallows a sudden nervousness taking over him.

“James, why are you nervous?” Your palm cups his cheek.

The red flush takes over his features. He gnaws at his bottom lip, “I just—, I’m wondering if this was a good idea, I mean not the giving you a gift but the gift itself.”

“James—,”

“I just, I hope you like it and I know you don’t like the whole materialistic aspect so I tried to combine the emotional aspect too—,”

“Baby,” you place your free hand right over his sternum feeling his heartbeat against your palm, “I’m going to love whatever you have in that box. And the fact that you put so much thought into it? I already love it.”

A smile breaks out across his features, the crinkles by his eyes enhanced and pure joy radiating from him. Handing you the box he moves to hold you by your waist, watching as you open it.

The velvet is soft and you see a soft glimmer as the gift catches the light. He takes your gasp as a good sign, his nerves begin to settle.

Across the box, lays a necklace, the pendant shaped like a quill, an exact replication of your tattoo. The shaft of it has a line of diamonds that reflect in the light. You look up at your man, not understanding why tears are gathering in your eyes.

“It’s beautiful.” You whisper, “I love it, James… Thank you.”

Bucky leans in brushing the escaped tear away from your cheek with his lips, “May I put it on you?”

You nod, he gently takes the necklace from the box, moving behind you. He meets your gaze in the mirror. The soft metal touches your skin and he watches the pendant shift as he decides the perfect length to wear it upon.

His fingertips trace along the nape of your neck to your shoulders. Bucky presses his lips to the crook of your neck, “Perfect even better than how I envisioned it.”

Your hand moves to his hair, running your fingers through it as you turn your head to kiss him. Warm hands encircle around your waist yet again holding you close.

Slowly your lips part, Bucky groans, watching the piece of jewellery nestle over your sternum drawing his eyes to your breasts.

All too soon he has you pushed against the wall, lips latched to yours as his hands explore your body, cupping your breast and palming it. You whimper onto his tongue. It only urges him on.

There is a knock on the door, “I hope y'all are decent.” Sam hopes to the heavens above.

You make a displeased sound as Bucky pulls away from you, gently setting your legs down from where they were around his waist.

“Patience, Feather.” He whispers, your hands roam over his chest.

“What is it Sam?” He questions, blue eyes trained on your seemingly innocent face.

You know the warning look. You don’t heed it. Your hands move to his belt buckle. To you Sam’s voice already drowned out.

“Feather.” Bucky hisses as your index finger trails over his growing erection.

“Don’t you want to see me just in the necklace?” You look up at him, pushing the fabric lower, allowing yourself to give him slow gentle pumps.

Bucky’s hands come to rest on the wall on either side of your head, caging you in. You bite your lip, his eyes turning towards the stormy blue you loved, not the kind out of his anger but the kind born out of you making him unravel, turning him feral, needy.

Bucky’s flesh hand grasps your neck. The thoughts begin to fly out the window from your mind.

“Feather, don’t start something you won’t finish because if I have to take over. Everyone will know just by your stride that you got fucked in the green room by your man.” He squeezes gently, your palm squeezes his length.

“You’re my good girl aren’t you?”

You nod.

“Words Feather, my good girl uses her words, even if she’s being a needy little brat.” He chuckles, if you turned him needy and feral for you he knew how to do the same to you.

“Yes, your good girl.” You answer.

You watch as he leans in, his breath fanning across your face, you just want to taste him.

“Can you both not?” Sam groans, “I cannot with you both right now, Y/N, you have to be out in five minutes. Stop letting him seduce you.”

Bucky closes his eyes, you giggle as he withdraws his hand from your throat.

“Feather, I know it's yours but you gotta let go of my dick please.”

“Oh, oh,” your skin heats as you retract your hand helping him get decent.

“For the record, you seduced me.” He narrows his eyes at you.

“Hey, we both know you probably thought of me naked with only the necklace on before I suggested it.”

His mouth hangs open, sputtering to cover up the clear truth. You cover your mouth to stop laughing out loud. Bucky shakes his head, a bemused grin on his lips.

The door is opened to a disappointed Sam and Yelena staring at the two of you. Their arms crossed.

“Just wanted to wish her good luck.” Bucky defends.

“Right, and does that involve your fly being open?” Sam raises a brow, Bucky scrambles turning around then huffs.

“It isn’t—,” he shuts up at Sam’s stern expression.

Yelena raises her phone to her ear, “She’ll be out in thirty seconds.”

Bucky pulls you close, lips pressing against yours in a quick kiss.

“Good luck, Feather. Once we’re back home I’m going to tell you the reason behind your nickname.” He kisses you again, leaving you breathless grasping onto his shoulders.

“Th-thanks.” You squeak out, he squeezes your ass, your eyes widen, skin heating, “J-James!”

He only gives a wink coupled with a cheeking grin. As he follows Sam out you watch him walk backwards laughing at your befuddlement.

“Ready?” Yelena questions, offering her hand to you as she always did, walking with you till it was your turn to venture alone.

You grasp her hand, nodding, “As I’ll ever be.”

There is a chorus of cheers when Yelena walks out to introduce your arrival. You spot Bucky, Sam and your mother sitting in a section reserved for family. It makes your chest warm seeing that area occupied finally.

When you step out it’s as surreal as the first time, the cheers, the squeals, the happiness of your readers infectious.

The first two hours are a blur of writing names, interacting, hearing the reader’s theories for the book and maybe a snippet of your next one. You take a sip of water as the line is held back for a moment.

You grab the sharpie as the line begins again,

“Hi, thank you for coming out to see me today—,” your mouth dries when you look up at the figure towering over you.

“If you could make that out to Alexander Pierce, that would be great.” Alexander smiles at you.

“A-alexander?” You find your heart plummet, he was supposed to be behind bars by now.

He pushes the book across the desk. Nudging your frozen hands into action. Opening the book you write down, his name,

“How about a sweet message?” He raises a brow, “I am your boss after all.”

“I um, sure.”

To Alexander Pierce,

Your actions speak louder than my words, which is why people can hold them in their hands.

Regards,

Y/N

He peers at the message, eyes narrowing then he smiles. He parts his mouth about to speak when you watch him descend onto your table headfirst.

You shift back standing, the chair plummets to the floor.

Darcy Lewis and Scott Lang stand behind Alexander, pressing him down on the table and extending his hands to cuff him.

“Alexander Pierce, you’re being placed under arrest for multiple charges of sexual assault, blackmailing, non consensual administration of narcotics, and financial embezzlement.” Darcy speaks clearly, her voice ringing above the bookstore’s clamour.

Alexander struggles in the grasp, “You’re making a grave mistake, Agent.”

“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.” She says, Alexander’s gaze locks on you.

“You opened your mouth, didn't you? If I come to know you have, I’m going to ruin your life. You fat fucking slut.” He roars, Darcy presses his shoulders down to prevent him from getting up.

Bucky’s cologne suddenly surrounds you. You look up, only to see his chin. He has you tucked against his chest protectively placing his arms around you.

“You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you?” She waits for his response which is only laughter.

“Oh Agent, you’re all going to regret this, don’t you know who I am?” He sneers.

Darcy rolls her eyes, “Alexander Pierce, do you understand the rights I have just read to you?”

“I do.” He seethes, “I want my fucking legal team.”

“We will contact them.” Scott says, they lift him up from the desk, he looks at Bucky. Anger coursing through his body.

“I warned you Barnes. Now you will know the consequences.” The older man spits out.

Bucky makes sure you cannot look at Alexander, palm blocking your head’s movement.

“Are you threatening me? Mid arrest? I haven’t done anything to you Alexander. I have always respected you.” Bucky speaks, Alexander’s anger only grows, he’s dragged out.

The bookstore grows quiet. Eerily so, the cameras still held up despite the FBI retreating and leaving.

Bucky gently shifts from you, still holding your hands within his own. You regard the entire store only hoping the threats he made will reach online so they can be used in court as well.

“Everyone I am so sorry, the event will have to be postponed to a later date. Those who did not get a chance to interact will have their tickets refunded. You will retain your book and the signing will take place at a later date.” A representative from HYDRA announces.

Bucky leads you back inside the green room. Sam and your mom are already watching the news unfold on his iPad.

She looks up at you demanding an explanation.

“I’ll explain later, mum—,”

“What did he do to you?” She cuts you off.

“Mum,” you swallow the lump forming in your throat.

Her eyes move onto Bucky, “Why was he threatening you? You were supposed to take care of her.”

He kneels in front of her, “I regret it everyday that I couldn’t protect her.”

“Mom it isn’t Bucky’s fault.” You sit next to Bucky grasping her other hand, “I’ll tell you everything. Just you cannot blame anyone but Alexander okay?”

She regards the two of you, Sam shifts, “I’ll make sure the three of you have some privacy.”

He walks out, shutting the door behind him.

“Alright, tell me and no covering anything or hiding any details. I may be sick but I’m not weak.” She warns, “I didn’t mean to blame you Bucky, I just, she’s my only child.”

“I know, I just, when I saw her that night, I blamed myself. I should have known better.” He sighs, you grab his hand with your free one.

“We’ll tell you everything, if it becomes too much tell us to stop and we will.” He requests of her.

“You will do the same.” She says, the two of you nod.

HEADLINES:

Alexander Pierce Arrested At Signing Of Author Y/N’s Fourth Book

Dolores Looks Sombre Exiting The FBI Branch

Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers and Other HYDRA Creatives Come Out In Support Of Long List Of Victims Of Alexander Pierce’s Abuse

‘This Is A Shock To Me’ Says Ace In Recent Interview Praising Alexander Pierce

Author Y/N Continues Book Signings Amidst Ongoing Court Case — How Exactly Harrowing Was The Ordeal If She Can Function Normally?

Brock Rumlow Arrested In Conjunction With Charges Pressed Against His Uncle

HYDRA Projects All Come To Standstill As Crews Organise Protests To Support Victims Os Sexual Assault.

Bucky Barnes And Y/N Y/L/N Spotted Getting Cozy At His Favourite Restaurant, Onlooker Spills The Beans On Their Conversation.

A.N.: so the queue didn't work and i had other one shots as well prepped but nothing went through so i manually reedited everything since i lost most of it unfortunately, i hope you guys enjoy the chapter, i know sometimes its fast paced compared to slowburn, we're nearing the end of it

Taglist is Open comment or DM to be added!

Taglist: @stevesmewmew @elle14-blog1 @crazyunsexycool @sebsgirl71479 @pandaxnienke @slutforsexyseabass @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @pandaxnienke @vampire7595 @buckyinluv

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yeetlegay · 2 years ago

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idg why people be hating this episode so much??? maybe i do but like it was such a breath of fresh air and seeing them so much in love with each other healed my soul?? quite literally. we all know we don't have to get too comfortable because once shit hits the fan there will be PAIN AND MORE PAIN.

Everybody is totally entitled to their opinions about the show and the story, so if you didn’t like it I literally do not care, it is totally okay and you are valid! I’ve really enjoyed the see-sawing from lighter to more serious episodes, which has ramped up a lot the past few weeks, but that’s not everyone’s cup of tea and I 100% understand that. I love that we’re getting the chance to see what Kinn and Porsche are like as a couple just existing, not having massive dramatic obstacles or external pressures making everything feel claustrophobic. But you’re right that this was just a momentary reprieve before we jump into the next brutal angst fest, so I will be holding this episode to my bosom for the rest of the season to comfort me when we see Kinn and Porsche go through it. 😭

#kinnporsche #yeetle asks #why don’t queue stay

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lululawrence · 3 years ago

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lululawrence’s August 2021 Fic List

Previous Fic Lists / Lulu's List Podcast Masterpost

I'll be honest, I usually say something nice about the past month here and do a little thing about how much I loved the fics I read and look forward to sharing what I loved about them them with you now, but I barely survived August, y'all. I don't think my brain actually did survive it completely. Please know the few fics I did manage to finish reading absolutely 100% helped me keep what little sanity I have left. So, authors? I'm raising a massive fucking glass to all of you. I love you more than you can ever know lol

August's podcast has finally arrived! It only took three attempts at recording to finally be completed without any massive issues and here we are. Whew. It feels great to have had that time to talk in some more depth about what I loved about each fic, so I hope you enjoy listening as much as I enjoy making it.

As always, be sure to show your love and appreciation for all of the hard work our fandom authors have put into their fics with kudos, nice comments, and (when applicable) reblogging their fic posts!

obsessed by @disgruntledkittenface / disgruntledkittenface (100, NR, Nick/Harry, Drabble, Meet Cute, Face Masks, she wrote this for me for my birthday and posted it on Grimmy's last day with R1 and it was just the most perfect timing, This fic was so sweet and after weeks of not having time to read anything, I had the perfect fic to read on repeat until I had time for more than 100 words, Bless you Maggie)

Home Again...Winter Harlow by @dandelionfairies / dandelionfairies (28k, T, Harry/Louis, Big Bang fic, Meet Cute, Chef Harry, Louis works in Gemma's shop, It's very Hallmark Movie-esque, complete with the town name and plot and everything, it is so so cute, Fluff, Flirting, All the warmth and softness you need)

Blow Me Away by @ladyaj-13 / LadyAJ_13 (6k, E, Liam/Louis, Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Blow Jobs, lmaooooooo, I mean, It is all about blow jobs but more about Liam's aversion to them, and GOOD HEAVENS the incredible communication they finally have is SO HOT, WORK OUT THOSE PROBLEMS BOYS, but also the way that Louis talks with the other guys to figure out what's going on, I about died but it does sound about right lol)

Getting a Head for Heights by @ladyaj-13 / LadyAJ_13 (4k, T, Greg/Lousi, Uni AU, Friends to Lovers, Sharing Clothes, Denial of Feelings, This fic is just so soft and silly and omg I loved every fucking moment of it)

Milk Kinship by @jaerie / jaerie (22k, E, Harry/Louis, 1D A/B/O fest fic, alpha Louis, omega Harry, nursemaid Harry, Employer/Employee Relationship, kinda? like there's defo power imbalance there, but it's consensual sooooo ¯\__(ツ)__/¯, breastfeeding, lactation kink, like the MOST lactation kink hahaha, angst with a happy ending, I thought I'd already read this but remembered I didn't and had to remedy immediately, Kinky and hot af as per usual haha, highly recommend if that's your thing lol)

The Stories They're Not In by @a-brighter-yellow / abrighteryellow (11k, E, Shawn/Niall, Heartbreak Weather fest, Song Fic, Based on San Francisco, Rocketman AU, mostly except make them American and a few other changes, but the vibe is totally still there, Niall is Bernie and Shawn is Elton, Friends to Lovers, Pining, Period Typical Homophobia but only in small doses, musicians, This fic is just so fucking soft and glorious the way it is all navigated and damn, i just loved it, it had it's own ambiance to it too?, i felt like i was entering a different world whenever i picked it up to keep reading)

Can't Buy My Love, Can Buy Me Dinner by @ladyaj-13 / LadyAJ_13 (10k, G, Harry/Louis, Uni AU, Enemies to Lovers, kind of, flashbacks, Zouis friendship, This fic is so fun and simple but also not at the same time, the emotions and motivations for everyone is so complex and real, it makes it so what could be an easily cliche and silly fic actually has so much depth and heart to it, I can't even begin to explain just please read it)

Until That Day by @kingsofeverything / kingsofeverything (45k, E, Harry/Louis, Big Bang fic, Runaway Bride AU, Enemies to Lovers, Established Narry but endgame Larry, Newspaper Columnist Louis, Baker Harry, Sarah and Mitch are Harry's best friends and omg I love them SO MUCH in this fic, The secondary characters bring so much color and flavor to this if that makes sense, The adaptations that were made to update the movie and make it British were incredible, I loved them so much and appreciated the adjustments that were made, it made it so Harry and the fic had more depth and a bit more realistic resolutions, plus harry's family was a larger part of it and his nan omggggg, anyway i devoured this fic in a night instead of sleeping so, a+ 10 out of 10 would recommend)

The Rest Of My Life by @reminiscingintherain / reminiscingintherain (11k, M, Niall/Bressie, Heartbreak Weather fest, Song Fic, Based on Black and White, meet cute, age difference, size difference, Canon Compliant for the most part? I think?, Flirting, It kind of is a very sweet set of vignettes capturing moments of their relationship from the day they meet through until they're much older and settled down, It was so soft and gentle and I loved how Bressie was written as well as how determined Niall was, looooved it)

Don't Hold Back by @jacaranda-bloom / jacaranda_bloom (15k, E, Niall/Harry, Heartbreak Weather fest fic, Song Fic, Based on Cross Your Mind, Famous/Non-Famous, Pop Star Niall, Fan Harry, Banter, Fluff and Humor, This fic was so soft and so much fun to read, and she somehow made it so the fan/singer scenario actually felt realistic???, it was really impressive and so fun)

#fic rec #my fic rec #fic list #august 2021 fic list #28th appreciation #fic writer appreciation #i did this so late last night i'm almost ashamed of how this turned out #but also i'm not changing it now #so enjoy lmao

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cotton-tails · 4 years ago

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Fluffy follow on from this angst-fest:

Donald sleeps in the mansion that night. They get back pretty late and frankly, everyone’s too exhausted to do anything other than drag themselves to their respective beds and pass out. There’re more than enough spare rooms for the non-residents, and after a few arguments and coin-flips for the best rooms (courtesy of Drake and Fenton), everyone settles quite quickly.

After dozing off on his shoulder on the plane, Donald ends up picking up both May and June and carrying them inside, tucking them into a twin room next to his. They barely stir, only waking long enough to pull the blankets up further and curl up tighter before dropping back off.

Despite his own exhaustion, Donald makes the rounds, checking in on all the kids and making sure they’re all truly safe and sound. He’s not entirely sure he’d be able to sleep soundly until he’d seen each and every one. Which, with the number of children in the house now reaching the double digits, now takes a little while longer than it used to. By the time he reaches his own bed, the tiredness has really sunk in to his bones, and he doesn’t even bother changing before crawling under the covers and dropping into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Which lasts about forty-five minutes.

Parental instincts are something that will never leave him as long as he lives. Even when the kids are all grown and he’s old and grey, he’ll still be a dad. And those Instincts will forever wake him up at the feeling of someone crawling into bed with him. No matter how deep a sleep he had been in moments before.

They also double as survival instincts. Good luck to anyone trying to sneak up on him while he’s sleeping.

So, when he feels the all too familiar feeling of the mattress sinking as someone else climbs up next to him, it's all he can do not to groan and possibly curse a little. Chances are it was one of the boys, most likely Louie, and honestly, after the ordeal of the day he'd hardly be surprised.

What does surprise him is turning over, blearily opening his eyes and seeing none other than his own sister attempting to get comfortable in the very small space between him and the edge of the bed.

"Dell?"

There’s a long silence, then, "no?" She's got a look on her face that even in the dark, he knows all too well, a weird mixture of guilt, worry and stubborn pride. And after the frankly traumatic events of the past twenty-four hours, he can't really say he's surprised.

"Hold on," he murmurs, shuffling over and giving her more room to get comfortable. She doesn't say anything, but he can see the gratefulness in her eyes as she curls up on her side and faces him. Her hair splays out on their shared pillow and tickles his nose.

"Sorry, I didn't want to wake you."

"It's alright," Donald replies, fighting back a yawn, "are you okay?"

"Couldn't sleep, kept seeing..." she trails off, but Donald knows what's eating at her. She'd barely left his side all evening, always finding excuses to touch, to make sure he's still really there; always linking arms, throwing an arm over his shoulder, or playfully punching him. He didn't comment, knowing how much his near-death experience had actually affected her. But moments like this show her true feelings with no reason to hide.

"I'm alright you know."

"I know you are, but every time I close my eyes all I can see is you falling, and my chest gets all tight and I can't breathe, and you're not there, I keep thinking I dreamt you coming back."

She looks like she's going to cry again, and he wants none of that. His hand finds hers under the blankets and he links their fingers and squeezes.

"Right here," he tells her, "I'm right here, we're all very much alive and safe, you don't need to worry."

She's quiet, looking into his eyes with an intense stare. He can see the anxiety, can see the worry, and the pain. He gets it; he won't pretend he didn't hear her scream as he fell. The sound still echoes in his head, but by miracle and magic, he's still alive, and they're still together. And if he’s honest, he’s definitely had more than his share of sleepless nights over her in his time.

"We should get some sleep," he says eventually, pulling the blanket up over her shoulder. He waits until she's completely fallen asleep, her face relaxing and breathing evened out, before closing his eyes and dropping off himself.

This time he barely gets twenty minutes, the time on the clock by the bed reading 02:07am.

Another body, much smaller, climbs up from the end of the bed, and slowly crawls up between them. It's always harder to tell between them in the dark, but when he had tucked them in he’d noticed they hadn't bothered getting changed. And Donald could just about make out the hood.

Louie then.

"You alright?" he whispers, and the small body freezes, wide eyes staring at him in the dark.

"I- uh-"

"It's alright, c'mon."

Louie relaxes at the soft tone and warm smile, and carefully carries on until he's tucked into the space just under Donald's chin. He wraps his free arm around him and rubs his back like he always used to when they were younger.

"Comfortable?"

Louie just nods into his chest.

Again, Donald waits until the boy has fallen asleep before trying to get a little sleep himself.

He doesn't even get that far.

Huey and Dewey don't say anything as they settle in; Huey tucking himself in between his stomach and Louie, and Dewey stretches out between Della and him.

"We all good?" Donald asks, watching them get comfortable with an amused smile.

They both nod, and Donald grins; they can finally all get some sleep.

An hour later and he's really starting to hate these instincts he's come to rely on all these years.

He has to say he's surprised to see Webby pulling herself up and finding a space to curl up just below the boys. Lena and Violet join her only minutes later, the three of them ending up curled up together in the space between his and Della’s knees. He doesn’t say anything, opting just to let them nestle down and go to sleep.

Next to join the party, and most surprising of all, is May and June.

He’s woken by the creak of the door, and manages to twist his head around enough to see the two girls stood anxiously by the door, hands clasped as tightly as his and Della’s, now squashed under a pile of children. He doesn’t bother checking the time, it’s still dark, and at this point he doesn’t care, he’s just going to stay in bed until he’s no longer bone-tired.

Honestly, he’s not entirely sure where they could fit, it’s not a massive bed, not a single, but not quite a double either. But he’ll be damned if he doesn’t try.

“There’s still space,” he whispers, gesturing them over, “somewhere.”

They don’t move, glancing nervously at each other, then back at him.

“Come on, it’s alright.” He stretches out an inviting hand, smiling when they take a cautious step towards him. “you guys are family now, just find a space and squeeze in.”

They end up tucked into the crook of his knees, curled up tightly together and using his leg as a pillow. He smiles, reaching down and smoothing their hair. They smile gratefully, closing their eyes and settling down.

Again, Donald waits until their breathing evens out in sleep. That should be all of them now, and he’s so very, very tired. He drops his head back to the pillow, takes a deep, calming breath, and closes his eyes.

#Ducktales #DT17 #Donald Duck #Dad!Donald #Della duck #HDLW #Lena #Violet #May and June #Donald has adopted them all and nothing with convince me otherwise #The last one was just tears and angst #have some tooth-rotting fluff too #my stuff

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danpuff-ao3 · 2 years ago

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The Making of: A Matter of Time

In 2021, a new fest was announced: Snarry Adopt-a-Prompt. I was excited! Another opportunity for new Snarries, oh good! More than that, I was tempted to participate myself. I was still fairly new to fests (I'd only taken part in Luna Lovegood Fest and Ron-Draco Fest earlier that year) and it seemed a shame I'd not done a Snarry one yet!

When the prompt list dropped, I ended up with quite the list of potential prompts I wanted. Like....a lot. My muse was running away from me with a thousand and one ideas (per usual), and I'm never good at making decisions. I ran my choices by friends. Got feedback. Brainstormed a bit.

In the end I chose: "#5. Schoolboy!Harry and Snape are secretly involved. Snape is severely injured in a DE meeting, Harry gives away the relationship by his reaction/panic."

Then proceeded to fret and second guess myself. And if you know me you will find this to be 0% surprising.

There was so much potential in that prompt. There was an old idea of mine I thought I could tie into it. A very specific scene of everyone finding out about Snarry when Severus was on the brink of death. The scene I envisioned never saw the light of day, oddly enough. The story transformed the more I considered various aspects.

First: the reaction. Then: well, if I'm writing a reaction, doesn't that make a good opportunity for outsider POV? I love outsider POV! There's not enough of it, in my humble opinion. But: whose POV? There were plenty of options there. I would need someone who could have eyes on the whole story unfolding. Hmm...

Once I figured one part out, the rest clicked into place, piece by piece in quick succession.

I have a chance to write outsider POV. But whose? And would I be missing anything by omitting Harry and Severus' POV? Who could tell the story best?

So while I rarely write multiple POVs in a story (I like to plant myself firmly in one person's head and stay there; I craft my style around that character's voice, and I worry it disrupts the flow to hop between characters), I decided it was my best option. If this was a good opportunity for outsider POV, I needed to take it! Multiple outsiders, plus one part of the ship itself.

What do they see? If Harry's reaction, and the fallout, are the main points, then I can't have Harry himself as the POV character for that scene. I need someone else's eyes on that. And for that scene, Severus would be in no state to witness his devastation.

And...Well, where does the story end?

If this is a Snarry story, and I'm going to include a POV from one of them, that would have to be at the end. That felt most right to me. If we end with happily ever after then either of my boys could be there to see it.

So where do we start?

Start with suspicion. Onlookers and gossipers. Then: the news, a dramatic scene, and end with...

Where do we end again?

Well, we need massive angst. This story is as ripe for angst as anything else. Heartbreak. Shock and judgment. How do we get there, then how do we get out of it?

The answer was: we don't get out of it.

I am quite fond of my open endings, after all. What if we never find out what happens to Severus? Now that is terrible and fascinating at once. Why not sit with the grief a bit? Some of my favorite stories leave you aching after. Why couldn't I do the same?

So that decision is made. Only...I needed to end with Snarry. Perhaps Harry at Severus' bedside, grief-stricken and begging Severus to wake up.

Or...

Or we could start there.

So...where do we end again?

Well, if we start at the end, then...Well. Why not work backwards? I'd never done reverse chronology before. That could be fun. We could start at the end and end at the start. We could have a Snarry POV that way. A glimpse at their love story to make it hit all the harder.

Besides. If one begins with grief, shouldn't one end with hope? And in a story like this, wouldn't hope make it all the worse?

I'm an emotional sadist, okay?

From there I needed only to fill in the gaps. Who would be my outsider POVs? And what roles would they play? What scenes would get me from grief to hope, or hope to grief? What sequence of events from happily in love Snarry to an uncertain future?

You know, AAP gave us 6 months to work on our fics, and I began and finished mine uncomfortably close to the due date. I had all of these plans and put them off, put them off, put them off. I had a ton of other projects to finish, and I had plenty of time. Until...you know...I didn't.

It was the end of NaNoWriMo and the due date was looming. There were a lot of start-and-stops. A lot of panic. How am I supposed to do this again? Oh no, it's not working! Too much hurt. Too many eyes. Too new a concept. An idea I cared too much for.

Have I mentioned that I don't work well under stress? I really, really don't.

What really saved me, and this fic, was a last minute decision to participate in Rare Pair Fest. There was a prompt that called to me, humorous and lighthearted (and full of age gap relationships, hallelujah.) It was an opportunity to indulge a bit. I allowed myself to be silly and have fun. I dabbled in both projects until my Rare Pair piece flowed easier. And once I completed that, I switched back to my Adopt-a-Prompt piece feeling rejuvenated.

I suppose one does, occasionally, need a break from the angst.

It was a wild journey for a story I thought I knew how to tell. And though it changed from its original conception, the heart of it remains the same. An affair. A tragedy. A scandal. A look at the Snarry relationship from both outside and inside. A reminder of how many people care about Harry, and how much they care about him. A show of just how deeply Harry cares for Severus; and a sad look at just how young he is, and how strong he's been. How he's been so alone in keeping his secret. Unable to lean on anyone else in his time of need.

Harry's grief permeates the entire work, though he's the only POV we don't have. At least for me, that was what was most present. He can't hide it from anyone. And even at the start, before anything happens, it's there; lurking in the darkness, waiting to come out. Love in wartime makes one so aware of loss. He was afraid, and already grieving in a way.

It was only a matter of time.

He has all the time in the world.

Honestly, I'm the worst.

And you know what? I'm dang proud of that fic. It had the LilaDiurne stamp of approval. And when it was posted, my dear PinaNaponi jumped into my DMs with "DANNI, WAS THAT YOU?" [Cue evil laughter.] Not everyone was so pleased, or prepared, to have their hearts broken. I felt like an all-powerful demon, or at least a pretty accomplished creator.

It's one of the works I'm proudest of; what I consider to be one of my best. (Alongside Contempt, of course.) It's one of those stories I look back on and think: wow. I did that.

(You can all thank @consistentsquash for having to listen to this 😂)

#story meta #navel gazing #snarry #writing #danpuff writes #The Making of #A Matter of Time

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onbeinganangel · 4 years ago

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hello! question for a rainy day. what are your top five favorite fics you've ever written? why?

hello my evil little darling, brightest star in the sky 🌟 you know exactly what you’re doing with this question and i hate you so much for it, thank you xxxxx

1. [redacted fic I can’t talk about as well you know, you terrible, terrible human being]

seriously though, even without that this is such a tough question buuuuut in chronological order we have:

1. Forever Yours/Yours Forever (wolfstar, M, 2.8k) — This was the first thing I ever posted on ao3 and it’s a very Mari brand of angst imo! At the point I posted this I think I had finished writing Inevitable but was too scared to post something that long and I had also finished taught by thirst and wanted something angstier and less spicy to balance it all out. I wrote it in one sitting and I’m still really proud of the post-Azkaban Sirius voice that I wrote for it. My feelings and thoughts on the Harry Potter series have shifted a lot in the past few years for a lot of reasons, but Sirius has always been a character I really love and I think even in canon his story is so so heartbreaking and he’s truly one of those characters you wish you could wrap up in a blanket and protect (shit just keeps happening to this man, like, give him a break) and I really enjoy writing his POV.

2. taught by thirst (jeddy, E, 6k) — I wrote taught by thirst for Sudsfest 2020, which was my first fest, so that makes it really, really special in my eyes. I didn’t know a lot of people back then, I was mostly still lurking and I was super nervous about it, but really wanted to go for it. I immediately fell in love with the prompt that inspired it, but I told myself to wait a couple of days (convinced the prompt was so good someone else would take it) and if no one took it, I’d claim it. And there it was, waiting for me when I went to check days later, so I no longer had any excuse not to write it. The prompt also came with a really good choice of pairings and I think I was a bit nervous about writing Drarry and just thought why not try my hand at a little bit of Jeddy? I think it’s a really fun piece and I do like a devious Teddy (I mean, come on, he is Tonks’ AND Remus’ kid, the boy is TROUBLE!!!) and I think there’s a really good balance of smut and sweetness and mischief in it.

3. Inevitable (From the Very Start) (drarry, 54k) — Lord, I’m sorry, I AM going to talk about it again. You did ask, though. I started writing Inevitable sometime… last summer? I don’t know? And I was… not doing so hot back then. This is truly one of those “I want to read a fic about X” and then you blink and you’re suddenly writing a fic about X. I keep describing Inevitable as my ultimate horcrux — I think everything you write or create ends up having a little bit of you in it whether you want it or not, but I am convinced Inevitable may have a little bit more of my soul in it than your average piece lol. I don’t like re-reading it because I feel like I’d write it really differently now but I still love it a lot. It’s Drarry in their 40s just… navigating life and really settling. You’ve got a neurotic widower Draco carrying a fuckton of grief and anxiety with him wherever he goes and you’ve got a no-fucks-given go-with-the-flow divorcee Harry just completely arse over tit for Draco. There are some big angsty/dramatic moments in it, but I feel like it’s all very slice of life, falling in love, lives melding together with all there is to them (friends, children, devious ex-wife, dead wife, jobs, dreams, etc).

4. Petrichor, Pineapple and Pomegranate (wolfstarbucks, E, 6k) — What’s a girl to do if she really loves triads and Wolfstar but also has a soft spot for Prongsfoot? Write. This. Fic. I’m going to be honest, I don’t even remember how my Year Of The Threesome Series idea came to be anymore (other than I was affectionately bullied into it by some people) and I don’t know how I decided that this would be the first one but it just happened. I wrote most of it in one day, it has one of my favourite passages/paragraphs I have ever written in it, I got to indulge in some scent kink and I got to write three best friends just banging it out. What’s not to like?

5. heavy (drarry, E, 6k) — Right. This one. Good afternoon from the most self indulgent shit I have ever written. Truly. heavy is the last of my Kinkuary series which proceeded to kill my ability to write while also teaching me that I am capable of so much more than I could have ever imagined. I’d saved the drarry pairing for last because they’re my favourite and tbh it seemed like a lot of pressure. There are already so many good kinky Drarry fics out there and I was so intimidated by the idea — so many of my favourite fic writers write mostly/exclusively Drarry and it was honestly daunting to even think about it. So I ignored it and wrote all the other filthy rarepairs like there wasn’t a massively scary thing waiting for me at the end like a sour middle to a delicious sweet. What ended up happening was that I was so fucking exhausted when I got to the end of Kinkuary that I went ‘fuck it.’

(Where’s that ‘I’m gonna give [me] everything [I] want’ or that ‘I’m gonna create a [fic] that is so [self-indulgent]’ meme when I need it? Lmao)

All through February, I kept a list of possible kinks to write for it since the last day didn't have a prompt/was a wildcard, and when I got to it I just... wrote a fuckton of them all into the same fic just because I wanted to!

In the end, I wrote the scary kink I’d wanted to write for ages, I wrote drarry falling in love through little snippets of smut packed with a ton of subtext and feeling and I was just really pleased that I put together this porn soup I would have never have put together in any other context.

And there you have it. I will change my mind again in 0.3 seconds but right now those are my favourite 5 fics I've written! Thank you for coming into my house and forcing me to pick my favourite puppies out of the litter lol

#m babbles #m writes

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shutteredislands · 4 years ago

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REYLO MODERN AU FIC RECS

Hi!! I spent my entire winter break reading reylo fics and I feel like I’ve found some gems! I’m boring and don’t like angst, so most of these are pretty fluffy, however, always read the tags before reading. Anyways, happy reading!

Already Home - College, Roommates, A/B/O, Soulmates AU - Complete - Rated E - 79k

“Oh stop being all Alpha-y.” She flexes her foot, rolling her ankle as if to prove a point, and he doesn’t miss the wince that crosses her expression. “You aren’t my Alpha, and you definitely aren't my soulmate,” she mutters.

He can’t help but let out a dry laugh. “Thank god for small mercies.”

Okay so this is a trope fest but it was so good! I’m not gonna explain the plot in depth because I think going in blind is best for this!

Baby, It's Just Biology - Professor/Student, A/B/O AU - Complete - Rated E - 113k

For Rey Jackson, trying to finish your degree in Biomedical Science at Harvard is difficult enough when you're one of the few Omegas on campus.

It's made even more difficult when your Professor is the one to trigger your heat. You can't help it, it's just your biology.

An Alpha Omega love story.

This is the perfect balance of angst, fluff and pure smut. This one Is a lot angstier than anything else on this list, but you can see every stage of this relationship and I loved it so much! Please read the tags on this one!

I’ve got you (under my skin) - Nanny/Single Parent AU - On Hiatus - Rated E - 81k

“Hi, I’m Rey. I’m here for the—”

“Nanny,” Ben blurts out dazedly, still trying to remember how to form coherent thoughts. “You’re the nanny.”

Her smile hitches up a little wider. “Well, I might be.”

Suddenly, Ben thinks he might be in for a whole new world of problems.

Because Rey Johnson is still most likely the only thing standing between him and disaster, that much hasn’t changed, not by a long shot.

And Ben can’t seem to stop staring at her mouth.

In which Ben hires Rey to watch his son... but he can’t seem to stop watching her.

Okay so I almost never read WIPs, but this one was left off in a pretty good place so don’t worry about cliffhangers or anything. I am a sucker for single dad!Ben so expect more of these. I loved this fic so much and get ready for a SMUTFEST.

Light My Fire - Rivals to Lovers, College, A/B/O AU - Complete - Rated E - 20k

When rivals Ben and Rey break into a professor's office together, it comes out that Rey might not be the Beta she thinks she is.

I’ve never been the biggest reader of enemies to lovers, until this. This was so so so good! I loved their banter so much, and this is another smutfest lol.

Peacock - Fake Dating, Enemies to Lovers, Neighbors AU - Complete - Rated E - 72k

Thanks to a series of misunderstandings, failed attempts at flirting, and loud Katy Perry music, Ben grows to hate his new neighbor.

Proposing to her wasn't the best solution to his problems.

This is, hands down, one of the funniest fics I have ever read. I cried actual tears because of how funny this is. Slowish burn, but their banter will keep you engaged the whole time. I love this so much!!

An Unexpected Vacation - Scientist, A/B/O AU - Complete - Rated E - 62k

“You don’t care that someone, that people will watch you fuck?” He looks two seconds away from puking. “Like multiple, multiple people will be able to describe your vagina. They’ll probably analyze it in a boardroom. Someone will feel proud about a shitty PowerPoint full of annotated pictures. They will use words like ‘arousal fluid’ and consult charts and these things will never not be digitally saved. That doesn’t bother you?”

“Are you suggesting my vagina is unworthy of analysis?”

In which Rey attempts to bolster her bank account by volunteering to fuck an Alpha in a scientific study. Plans go pear-shaped when she accidentally triggers scientist!Ben’s first Rut.

This was a really funny smutfest and I loved that. I loved Rey and Ben so much, and Ben was the perfect “I hate everyone but you” boyfriend! I love this!

She Doesn’t Normally Bite - Single Parent/Teacher AU - WIP - Rated E - 37k

Ben Solo is a single dad to 6-year old Ellis. Her teacher isn't the old-cat lady that he expects and naturally, sparks fly when they meet. Rey helps show Ben that he is allowed to be happy and the romance is DELICIOUS. There will be the happy ending we all deserve.

Both Ben and Rey have a lot to navigate, and of course - things are never straight forward.

Tw: Bens wife died when their daughter was born - whilst it is mentioned periodically, it does not form a significant part of the story. There'll also be warnings in the notes for the particular chapters it'll be mentioned in.

THIS THE ONLY WIP I WILLL EVER READ REY AND BEN ARE SO FREAKING CUTE AND ELLIS IS SUCH A CUTE KID AHHHHHHH! That is all.

Down an Inch, Up an Inch - A/B/O, Soulmates, Gym Rats AU - Complete - Rated E - 60k

Omega instructor Rey has always been the master of her domain at Rebel Belle Barre and wouldn't dream of dating an Alpha.

When her new neighbors at Supremacy Bootcamp start ruining her classes with their terrible music, she storms over to give them a piece of her mind. She challenges the beefy ex-Marine owner Ben Solo to a plank-off and the loser has to take the other's class. When they spark an unusual connection, can Rey stay away for long?

Has she bitten off more than she can chew with the gentle giant Alpha with the warm, sad eyes?

SMUT FREAKING FESTTTTT. Okay but I loved these two so much, even though I am opposed to working out in any shape or form! I love the non-traditional soulmate part, and I really loved Rey in this.

Tea for Two - Enemies to Lovers, University Setting AU - Complete - Rated E - 67k

'"This is a tea house, you know." The plummy, ultra-posh voice startled Rey Kenobi from her day-dreaming, almost spilling the scalding hot coffee over her chest.'

Rey, an American former hacker, turned cyber security expert, has been commissioned by Oxford University to protect their systems from hackers. Unfortunately, she has to work closely with Professor Ben Solo, Merton Professor of English Literature who also happens to be Lord Ben Solo, member of the English peerage. And an unmitigated snob.

She drinks coffee. He drinks tea. He only reads classic literature. She reads Marvel comics. He is nobility. She is a nobody.

Things should go swimmingly, shouldn't it?

SO. MUCH. UNRESOLVED. SEXUAL. TENSION. I loved the slow burn aspect because I sat in bed because I was waiting for them to bone for so long. And after they bone its a smut and fluff-fest I loved this so much!

And They Were Roommates - Roommates, A/B/O AU - Complete - Rated E - 49k

“This isn’t going to work.” He points a finger between the two of them. “This arrangement.”

Her eyes narrow. “You didn’t put any specifications on who could apply.”

“Yeah…” He rubs the back of his neck then, the action making it look longer, making her wonder what it might feel like under her fingers. “You have to know that this isn’t a good idea.”

She knows what he means, she does—but she’s so tired of being brushed aside for her designation that she challenges him anyway. “And why not?”

His eyes bore into hers, his expression blank as he says, “Because I can tell how much scent-block you put on—and I can still smell you.”

In which Rey’s new roommate turns out to be a lot more than she bargained for.

EVEN. MORE. UNRESOLVED. SEXUAL. TENSION. Like these two would be eating cereal and I would be chanting, “bone! bone! bone!” the whole time. I loved these two, and the family aspect of this one was so good.

Imprints - A/B/O, Boss/Employee AU - Complete - Rated E - 74k

“I was happy you’ll be working with someone you know. He’ll take good care of you.”

Take good care of you.

The words send a shiver down her spine, sparking memories that flood her with embarrassment. She feels a strange itch just below her ear, her gland giving a phantom pulse as if her body remembers the incident even still.

Suddenly her triumph fades into dread, the idea of working here leaving a hollow pit in her stomach. Poe is still talking, but she doesn’t hear most of it. Her mind is firmly trapped in the vivid memories of six years ago— in a moment she wishes she could forget.

By the time she hangs up the phone— she isn’t sure anymore if she can do this.

Okay so this is pretty popular so I wont say too much, but it lives up to the hype. Smutfest, fluff and angst rolled into one beautiful fic!

Bespoke - Enemies to Lovers, Boss/Employee (?) AU - Complete - Rated E - 38k

When new stylist Rey Jackson receives a request to dress the hottest (and most unfashionable) new actor in Hollywood, she gets a lot more than she bargained for.

Mentally AND physically.

Because Ben Solo is freaking massive.

THIS WAS SO HOT OMG! Smutfest but also super cute. Another “I hate everyone but you” version of Ben I fell in love with. Loved this!

Incognito - Coworkers AU - Complete - Rated E - 30k

“Somehow Rey’s coworkers find out about her Daddy kink. They all kink shame her for it, except her coworker Ben. He has something else in mind.”

This was so funny! Ben and Rey were so cute, and I love Finn and Rose in this too! This was great!

A Home For Christmas - Single Parent, Sugar Daddy AU - Complete - Rated E - 109k

Rey is a struggling single mother who needs to do right by her daughter, even if it means she needs to steal. Ben is sad and lonely, recently divorced for the second time. When Rey's daughter picks him to help her find her mom, their paths cross and their Christmas becomes a little more bright.

This was so freaking cute OMG!! I know I say that a lot, but this was so adorable! I loved Ben and Rey so much, but Nova was obviously the star of the show. I cannot recommend this enough!

Unsuppressed - Office, A/B/O AU - Complete - Rated E - 49k

Rey had only ever encountered two Alphas in her entire life that had been unsuppressed. And now this third one that stunk up the entire building. Not that it stunk, his scent. In fact, it was the most delicious thing Rey had ever smelled. ///////////////////////////////////// Ben Solo closed his eyes as he rode down the elevator from the 40th floor to the lobby, trying not to reach up to his glands to scratch them. Somehow, it felt like he always caught the elevator that was dripping in the Omega’s scent. The one that wandered around the building without any suppressants. The one that smelled better than any Omega he had ever smelled before.

STRAIGHT FLUFF AND SMUT OMFG!!! I loved this so freaking much! This was whatever the opposite of unresolved sexual tension and slow burn. Like Ben and Rey tried to make this a slow burn but they could not keep their hands off of each other. I loved this!

Sunshine and Gunpowder - Hitman, Surprise Parents AU - Complete - Rated E - 48k

She’s a teacher who would do anything to protect her student. He’s a glorified hitman with a heart of black gold.

Together, they make up odd halves of a beautiful whole.

THIS WAS SO CUTE!! Like, yes, I know Ben is a hitman, but when I tell you he was the softest hit man I have ever read, Temiri was so cute in this! I loved Ben and Rey, and their UST made me love them even more. Han and Leia are also hilarious in this!

It Takes a Village - A/B/O, Surprise Parents AU - Complete - Rated E - 40k

Who knew that all it would take for Rey Johnson to interact with her enigmatic Alpha neighbor without wanting to melt into a puddle of hormones was a baby being abandoned at her doorstep?

Not her. That was for sure.

THIS IS THE CUTEST ONE YET! I REREAD THIS QUITE OFTEN! LIKE AHHHHHHH SO FREAKING FLUFFY! NOT EVEN A WHISPER OF ANGST AND A LOT OF SMUT I LOVED THIS SO FREAKING MUCH AHHHH! AND THE EPILOGUE MADE ME CRY!

Sensual Storytime - Office AU - Complete - Rated E - 23k

When Rey Johnson starts a new job, her initially antagonistic relationship with Ben Solo from IT turns into friendship... and maybe something more.

Little does she know he also moonlights as Kylo Ren, the creator of her favorite audio erotica. One day at the office, worlds collide, and she realizes the sweater vest-wearing nerd of her dreams is also the tattooed fantasy man she listens to while getting off every night...

THIS IS MY FAVORITE REYLO FIC EVER. I RECOMMEND THIS TO PEOPLE WHO DON’T EVEN LIKE STAR WARS! THIS IS COWORKER BANTER LIKE NO OTHER. AND THE SMUT ? UNPARALLELED. READ THIS NOW!

That is all I have time for right now, but I’ll make another list later if anyone would like that! Please take care of yourself and have a great day!

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angelictaehyun · 5 years ago

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Growing Pains

⤷ In kindergarten, he accidentally punched your nose. Thankfully, from that, a loving, caring friendship blossomed. Since then, you both had been attached at the hip, until suddenly... you’re halfway across the globe, a couple thousand miles apart.

PAIRING; yeonjun/reader

WORD COUNT; 3.2k

GENRE; singer!yeonjun, coming of age au, angst, slight fluff

WARNING; mild swearing, heartbreak, abandonment, angst

Honestly, five-year-old Yeonjun was nothing short of a nightmare. Though, he was seen this way only by you.

On a sunny day, sometime in kindergarten, he sat crouched on the playground’s field, searching for a ladybug. As for you, you believed if you found a ladybug, it could grant you a wish, thus you joined the young boy in his quest. You sat next to him, mindlessly searching the grass, and when he looked up to see you... he panicked. Other children, as he was told, are unclean and gross, and that’s exactly the sentiment he told himself as he pushed you onto the grass, causing you to scrape your elbow and bleed. You couldn’t stop sniffling as a big, crocodile tear trickled down your face; he felt terrible. In the palm of his clammy hand, he held a tiny, red ladybug, and seeing you cry, pushed him to give it to you.

"Please, just take it,” he quivered nervously. He thrust his hand in your face to present the small creature, but he ended up punching your nose. Unsurprisingly, you began full-on bawling.

He ended up in the principal’s office, and despite his feeble attempt to explain the true incident, his nap and playground time was taken away as punishment. Shortly after, he sulked back to class, passing the nurse’s office. Through the tinted, glass window, he saw you laying on an uncomfortable cot with an ice pack held over your nose and gauze over your injured elbow.

He was miserable.

He decided to genuinely apologize. He despised the idea of you being upset with him, even though he didn’t know you. After a stolen pint of ice cream from the school’s cafeteria, a pleading fest, a horrendous papier-mâché, and a heartfelt apology, you decided he wasn’t the worst. As for Yeonjun, he decided he liked you and suddenly, in the blink of an eye, he was glued to your side.

But you didn’t mind. It was hard to resist his smile.

· ──────────────────── ·

The day you decided Jung Mina was your absolute, garbage, worst enemy, you were nine.

On your first day back at school, you had gone to the restroom for a quick minute, and when you returned, you found she had stolen your diary to read in front of the class. Though she was quite the golden child, pissing you off to no end. Fortunately, your school’s field day neared the horizon and you decided to show her up. You wanted everyone, specifically Choi Yeonjun, to see your pure, unadulterated talent. You decided to absolutely destroy her in each event.

You were quite the vengeful nine-year-old.

Yeonjun, on the other hand, felt hesitant to follow through with your field-day-domination plan. Mina was just too pretty. Her hair smelled like sage and he had the biggest crush on her, unbeknownst to you. He was scared to mention his deep, dark secret, especially after you vocalized your complicated plan. You received virtually no help from him on field day. Despite that, you had won nearly every event. Unfortunately, somehow, you remained tied for champion with Mina, but the tiebreaker seemed quite simple. All you had to do was win a human-wheelbarrow race with Yeonjun, it was almost too easy.

And in all honesty, you would’ve won had Yeonjun not dropped you in the middle of the field and trip over your body, easily distracted by an air kiss from Mina, herself. He’d been lovestruck, but he didn’t have much time to dwell, especially not when you were squashed under him. He scrambled to help you back up, hoping he didn’t completely ruin your chance but it was too late, you had long lost the race. He turned to you, meeting your unkempt ponytail, narrowed, piercing gaze, sweat, and pursed lips. He was terrified, rightfully so. You told him off in the middle of the field, him withering in shame as he took in your colorful wording.

You chose to ignore him for a week, leaving him pouty. He decided to relive the past and create another papier-mâché, steal ice cream, and beg for forgiveness at your front door. He stood in the doorway, glancing at you with big, apologetic doe eyes, as an onset of a tear formed. Your resolve crumbled as you pulled him into a forgiving hug. As you pulled away, you admired his puffy lips which tilted into a small smile, and for the first time in your life, you felt your heart flutter.

He never did tell you about his crush on Mina. In the end, it didn’t quite matter.

· ──────────────────── ·

Year thirteen, you experimented with makeup. A lot of it. You tried different brands, colors, and styles. Yeonjun would be lying if he said you didn’t resemble a clown, but he kept his mouth shut and let you figure yourself out. Unfortunately, people were mean. When boys laughed at you behind your back, he made sure to drag them outside and put them in their place. When girls acted catty, he held you when you cried. When your family fell apart, he sat and devoured ice cream until your stomach ached. When you decided to join the dance team, he cheered you on at the audition.

He was always protecting and supporting you, even when you weren’t aware.

Lastly, when Homecoming approached, he was by your side as your unofficial date.

You both sat on the gym bleacher, overlooking your classmates who were either awkwardly swaying to the music, stuffing their faces at the snack station, or making out with each other. You regretted attending the dance, considering your boredom. though, when your watchful gaze traveled back to the couple kissing, a brilliant idea came forth.

“Junie, you know, neither of us has had our first kiss,” you observed, leaning slightly to see his reaction. He simply hummed in response, not fully listening. You continued, “... and I want to have my first kiss. I think we should have our first kiss with... each other.”

He stayed still, showing no indication of acknowledging your statement. You didn’t blame him, the music was quite loud anyway, you could barely hear yourself. You pretended you didn’t say anything and for an awfully long moment, you both stayed silent. Though that silence mixed in with a hint of embarrassment got too overwhelming, you had to excuse yourself to the restroom. As you left, he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. He definitely heard you, but he didn’t know how to process your ask let alone go through with it. He spent so much time, deep in thought, that he failed to realize your absence. When he snapped out his pensive state, he searched the massive gym for you and found you almost immediately, but you weren’t alone. You were pressed up against a dirty, filthy wall, experiencing your first kiss with someone that most certainly wasn’t Yeonjun.

He stood frozen, feeling a bit creepish, yet he couldn’t move if he wanted to, he couldn’t even breathe. Unfortunately, you didn’t stop until a while later, forcing Yeonjun to watch every second in complete agony. Your hair was messy and you were out of breath— that sight broke Yeonjun’s heart. The other boy dragged you onto the dance floor and when you spotted Yeonjun, standing absolutely dumbfounded, you sent a big smile and cheeky wink his way.

You seemed too cheery, and though he was your best friend that should’ve reveled in your happiness, all he saw was red. He felt pure, unadulterated rage, and jealousy. He was supposed to make your first kiss unforgettable, not the other boy.

It was supposed to be him.

· ──────────────────── ·

At fourteen, you decided you didn’t necessarily like your boyfriend all too much, especially since someone else already held your heart. Sure, you felt the loss of your first relationship, but the realization that you’d loved Yeonjun for longer than you cared to admit, hurt more. Though, what hurt the most, was the conclusion that your love was likely unrequited. That night, you sobbed into the phone, and the second he heard your cracked voice, he hopped on his bike and headed in your direction.

It didn’t matter the time, he needed to make sure you’d be okay.

Naturally, he believed you were heartbroken from your breakup, so he attempted to soothe you with ice cream and cuddling. He pulled you against his chest and softly caressed your hair as you watched Titanic; it was supposed to make you feel better, but it made you feel significantly worse. He belted out the movie’s famous ballad in a feeble attempt to lift your spirit and for the first time that night, you smiled. It was a fake smile, of course, but he wasn’t privy to that. Nonetheless, he thought you looked breathtaking.

You complimented his soothing, silvery, beautiful voice — it made his heart swoon.

He was fourteen when he decided to become a singer. It was also at fourteen, he realized he was hopelessly in love with you.

· ──────────────────── ·

At fifteen, you rode the dinky, old subway with Yeonjun to a company audition — one he eventually passed and became a trainee for.

You were there the day he stepped foot into the building for his first training session. You were there when he felt like a loner amongst the other trainee, and you were there when he decided to become the absolute best, letting nothing get in the way of his dream. He set his sight high, and with that determination running through his bloodstream, he decided to express his undying love for you. So when you kissed him back, on the roof of his house, under the moonlight, after eating a gallon of ice cream, he felt like he had everything in his grasp.

After that night, you never let each other go. You stayed by each other’s side and fell more in love as the days passed by, remaining blissfully unaware of the pain the future had to offer. At least you were happy, even if that happiness was on a ticking clock.

· ──────────────────── ·

You were eighteen when you packed a bag and said goodbye to Yeonjun.

A month before high school graduation, you irrationally decided to study abroad in America. You weren’t stupid, you knew about the promise he made to himself when he was younger, his whole schtick of letting nothing stop him from his dream. You knew you were a hindrance, and it was only a matter of time before he realized that as well. You loved him with your entire heart, that much was obvious, but you didn’t want to be the thing to hold him back. He begged you to stay, he said he could have you and success, something you both knew was a plain lie. He couldn’t have you and be an idol, it was one or the other, but he was too stubborn to admit that to himself.

He drove you to the airport in a painfully silent car ride. He was angry, hurt, devastated by your decision to leave him, but you, on the other hand, felt complete and utter relief. He was so close to reaching his dream and all you truly wanted was his happiness, unfortunately, leaving was the only way you knew how to ensure it.

You cried as you said your farewell to him, but his blank face gave no indicator as to how he truly felt; he had barely spoken a word to you the entire week leading up to your departure. He stood motionless as you kissed his cheek, completely devoid of emotion — it hurt you. When you walked away, you felt heartbroken but much lighter. He watched your figure travel through security, unable to bring himself to leave. When you turned for a final glance, you noticed how broken he seemed, but you knew he’d piece himself back together — it would just be without you.

When you turned the corner, leaving his sight, he let every emotion flood his body. That night, he sobbed into his pillow, crying harder than he ever had before.

He’d lost you.

· ──────────────────── ·

You truly discover yourself at twenty. You graduated university earlier than everyone else, got your first and only tattoo, decided America wasn’t great, and moved back to Seoul. Hell, you even found your signature scent.

As much as the country itself sucked, your time in America served you well. You got your first job, experienced university life, made a friend or two, dated a lot, but most importantly, you got the degree you diligently worked for. Of course, it was hard to be away from him. You spent months holed up in your room, refusing to leave the apartment. It hurt the most when you watched his debut, seeing his face rushed every memory back to you. However, over a long period, you slowly pieced yourself back together and moved on. Eventually, you were able to think of him without feeling a sharp pang in your heart.

When you moved back, you weren’t surprised to see his handsome face plastered along the subway or on large billboards. It brought up old scars, habits, memories, but it reminded you that he was able to achieve everything he sought out to do. You, of course, knew he would, he was too stubborn and hardworking to fail; he was meant to succeed.

You just hoped he was happy.

While you were self-discovering in America, Yeonjun nearly gave up everything. He wasn’t proud to admit it, but countless times he almost bought a one-way ticket to you. However, a newfound brother held him back and kept encouraging him to move on. Not long after, he thanked Soobin for his support, had it not been for him, Yeonjun would’ve given up everything. He understood why you left and it was that knowledge that pushed him to work harder, he just wanted to make you proud, even if you were out of his life. He worked tirelessly to debut and once he did, he realized that despite everything, it was worth it.

If it was meant to be, he’d find you again.

He let his mind stray to you from time to time. He couldn’t help it, you were the love of his life. He truly hoped that wherever you were, you were happy.

· ──────────────────── ·

At age twenty-one, on a warm summer’s night, you left your apartment to head to a convenience store, searching for a pint of ice cream and an iced coffee, and maybe an energy drink if you were feeling desperate. Not a month into moving home, you had decided to pursue a master’s degree, but on a night such as this, where you frantically searched for any source of caffination just so you could complete your dissertation, you sorely regretted it.

You were met with harsh, fluorescent lighting as you entered the store but it was a welcomed relief, especially after staring wide-eyed at a computer screen for the past week. You browsed then snack aisle, too preoccupied to notice the soft jingle of the opening door. a tall, lean figure strut past your aisle, standing in front of the drink section for a bit, clearly having trouble deciding on a beverage. You made your way to the front, feeling content with your pint of ice cream, iced americano, and a bonus bag of pretzels. On your way, you stumbled into the hoodied boy and you cursed yourself because only you would run smack into the only other customer in the shop. You scrambled to pick up your scattered belonging, “Oh my God! I’m so sorry, I didn’t see where I was going, I’m such a klutz. Next time, I’ll pay more attenti—”

“Y/N, it’s you...” the soft, hushed voice cut off.

You stared at the young boy’s feet, slowly lifting your gaze to scan the rest of him, stopping at his broad chest, too afraid to look into his fox-like eyes. You knew it was him, of course, you did. It was the same deep, soothing, honeyed voice you spent your childhood falling in love with. Your breath caught in your throat as you dared steal a glance at his face. When you finally met his piercing gaze, he thought he saw the universe in your eyes. He opened his mouth in silent awe as a stray tear cascaded down his cheek. He moved toward you as if you were a flighty deer, and hovered his face closely. You thought he was going to kiss you, and surprisingly, you were quite eager despite the time apart. He pulled you into a loving embrace, so tight, you believed he’d never let go — not that you wanted him to.

That night, he accompanied you home.

Your heartfelt reunion was more than you could’ve asked for. He spent the night with you, doing nothing but catching up, laughing at past memories, eating ice cream, and slowly falling back in love. When he pressed you against your sink, he kissed you with everything he had. At that moment, you understood that despite the painful heartache, everything worked for the best.

You were truly meant to be, you found your way back to him.

Everything was complicated, unsurprising for an idol, but he saw the way you looked at him; it was a look that said you’d move every mountain and all the bright stars in the sky, just to make him happy. It was the same way he looked at you.

He told himself once, when he was a young five-year-old, that he wanted to stay by your side. He left it once, but he’d be damned if he ever left it again.

#txt imagines #txt x reader #txt fanfic #txt scenarios #yeonjun x reader #yeonjun imagines #yeonjun drabbles #choi yeonjun #idol!yeonjun #choi soobin #choi beomgyu #kang taehyun #huening kai #yeonjun #kpop fanfic #angst #fluff #txt #funky fox

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spookyheaad · 3 years ago

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Have some Death art!! (Trigger warning: blood)

Next chapter of the Tesoro Stella fic is actually nearing completion!!!! I’m finishing it up & then I’m gonna do some tweaking! Also @goldenshowman I got SO MUCH MORE TESORO IN SUSPENDERS CONTENT PLANNED. I’ve been cursed by laying eyes on Tesoro in his suspenders & now I only crave more.

I was thinking on the subject of fanfiction & got reminded of my old Darksiders fic called “Decay”, it’s basically a whole angst fest with Death & him dealing with the traumas of his past & then -

-Y’know-

-Casually gets punished & tortured by the Charred Council for going off somewhere without orders. So they take away his near invulnerability & coerce War into beating him within inches of his life.

I made the fic in high school so there’s mistakes everywhere in it lmao. If anyone fancies a read, go for it:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25216774/chapters/61121785

But I have some old art of Death just, being brutalized, because I used to vent a lot through Death. That honor now goes to Tesoro tho; decided to give Death a break 😂

This is going to be very controversial but - ok - Death bleeds. He bleeds I swear; they gave him the blood effect when he gets hit in Darksiders 2, so I’ll take it as canon. Just because he’s nearly invincible & looks like a corpse don’t mean he can’t bleed.

Anyway, I have a ton of old doodles like this where I pictured Death either suffering as he did during the Nephilim Genocide, or the guilt just eating away at him.

It was such a small thing but that scene in Darksiders 2 where we see Death’s silhouette on Eden as he is killing his brethren, the amulet collecting their souls around his neck, and we see him with arrows in his back. I don’t know why but that just stuck with me.

This image:

There’s no doubt so much pain and conflict in his mind at that point in time.

[[Off topic, but for some context for my mutuals who don’t follow Darksiders, Death doesn’t have a canon face design so all of us just make up our own. We thirst.]]

Pretty sure I don’t even have this file anymore; I actually swiped it from my Instagram. I had an excerpt from the “Decay” fanfiction underneath it that I still really like. Even tho that fic is so old, it had its moments (TRIGGER WARNING: MENTION OF BLOOD AND GORE):

War spoke in a grave tone. “I know my limits, and I would never kill you, but I will use the pain I bring to teach you a lesson in humility.”

War bent over and hoisted Death up by his neck. His boots dangled above the ground, and he writhed in pain beneath his youngest sibling’s strong hold. His weak hands found their grip on War’s arm, as Death tried to catch air in his throat.

He raised Chaoseater, “It’s a most valuable lesson, so remember well.”

War thrust his weapon through Death’s abdomen; he shrieked violently, his muscles tensed up and he grit his teeth as fresh blood seeped out of his mouth. Death continued to scream until he could no longer. He felt his bones rest upon the portion of the massive sword that was left inside his mortal wound, between slabs of flesh and injured organs. War had let go of his throat and let the blade keep him hoisted in the air for a few moments. He watched his brother cry out upon the blade; it unsettled him to see the most feared of The Four, become the weakest in this moment.

He lowered Chaoseater so Death’s legs could now support his body as best they could, then, gripping the hilt of the blade, War pulled back swiftly. Chaoseater freed itself from the Pale Rider’s abdomen with the sickening sound of tearing flesh.

Death’s existence has never really been a happy one.

I think to end off this mini art dump, here’s another picture I swiped from my Instagram of Death & Zemira sharing some kisses ☺️

The caption I had for this pic still tugs at my heart:

“I never felt true warmth, until her.”

#I like the idea of death having a slightly lower body temp than others since he is the embodiment of the grim reaper #he’d be a great cuddle buddy in hot weather #Zemira gets to warm him up I’m so jealous lmaooo #Death is so huggable you guys have no idea #Daily reminder to play the Darksiders games #I have so much art of Death & Zemira being all touchy and loving on one another and my heart just - explodes #cant get over how hot the grim reaper is 😔#darksiders #darksiders 2 #art #fanart #fanfiction #darksiders death

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safflowerseason · 2 years ago

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obi-wan kenobi

I’ve been relatively indifferent to Disney Star Wars content thus far (I loved the Expanded Universe novels of the early 00′s, which were *way* more interesting plot-wise than JJ Abrams recycling the original trilogy). But I decided to check out the Kenobi series because of its connection to the original material, and because the character of obi-wan and ewan mcgregor’s performance were objectively one of the better parts of the prequels.

So far, my feelings about it are pretty lukewarm. Ewan McGregor’s Sad!Ben performance is starting to get a wee bit old...the acting choice makes sense to me, I guess, but the overall tone of the series is just so grim (say what you will about the originals/prequels, they weren’t relentless slog-fests of angst). I read a review that points out how the series has a fundamental problem with stakes, which I also agree with considering we know the fates of the three most important characters in the series (the part v end twist is intriguing, but I’m reserving judgment because I also feel like there’s also huge potential for some very stupid ret-conning on the part of the writers, out of desperation to fix the stakes problem.)

I do appreciate how the series has aesthetically tried to unify all the different “eras” of Star Wars, and continued to expand the “Rebellion.” Although, considering our current political climate, I’m starting to get a bit too raw for the recurring “small scrappy ragtag group of rebels vs massive technologically advanced army” climaxes of Star Wars in which lots of innocent people get mowed down.

The actress who plays Leia is cute. I appreciate they chose to cast a literal child, not a teen pretending to be a ten year old, although it obviously comes through in the performance, especially in the action scenes. I do wonder if the storyline would have been served better by setting it twelve or thirteen years after the events of Return of the Jedi, instead of ten..I get that Luke and Leia are barely eighteen when A New Hope begins, so there isn’t a ton of time to play with, but Leia is *so* young, there’s nothing enjoyable or compelling about watching a tiny little girl get chased and kidnapped and have guns and giant torture machines pointed at her. It wouldn’t be much better with a teenager, either, but slightly less excruciating to watch. I do hope we’ll see *some* Kenobi/Luke interaction before the series wraps up, and another glimpse of Joel Edgerton.

Finally, I hope they paid Hayden Christensen *a lot* of money to come back and wear the suit and film some flashbacks...he deserves some Disney money. I read an interview the Hollywood Reporter did with him and he came off as refreshingly grounded and thoughtful about the show and the whole Anakin journey.

#kenobi #obi-wan kenobi #kenobi spoilers #obi-wan kenobi spoilers

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rpsocsandcanonohmy · 3 years ago

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Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

This is part of an ongoing story that can be read here on AO3. Reading the previous chapters is highly reccomended for context. This chapter has been posted here for Whumptober 2021 and @whumptober-archive

Day 9: Rumors of my Death Have Been Greatly Exaggerated

A/N: Massive thank you to my amazing beta @welcome-to-the-sin-zone andto @thinkinghardhardlythinking for the initial inspiration for this story.

TW: Suicide, Implied Character Death, Massive Angst

-------

[Text to: Duke]: Hey

[Text to: Duke]: You haven’t responded to anything I’ve sent so either they’re not letting you use your phone or you don’t want to answer

[Text to: Duke]: I wish you’d respond either way, since I don’t know where you are

[Text to: Duke]: I miss you. Things haven’t been getting easier around here. I wish I could talk to you for real

Your texts went unanswered, as usual. It had been almost a month since the arrest and, despite your best efforts, you had no idea where Duke was being held or if he was still alive or anything. It was like he dropped off the face of the Earth.

Meanwhile, you were back on the ranch. The money you’d won did help, more than you’d initially thought even. But it didn’t fix everything. And, as much as you hated to think it, you were really considering selling some land without Dad’s say so because he was getting very, very annoying with his insistence that there just had to be another way to solve your problems. Selling horses was all well and good but there weren’t major profits to make from it. Renting the land was an option but it wasn’t very good for farming and ranchers don’t rent anything. You didn’t have nearly enough staff to run any kind of camp or lessons. You were running out of ideas and nothing you said seemed to get through to him. And the worst part of it all?

Duke was gone. He’d only really been in your life for about half a year but that meant the world to you all the same. He’d been a listening ear and a source of support where there hadn’t been one before. It didn’t hurt that he was attractive and very good in bed but that wasn’t all you cared about. For a few months, you’d had someone to be there for you, someone you could lean on when you wanted or needed to, and that was amazing. But you didn’t have him anymore and your world seemed a lot lonelier than before.

“Y/N! Where are you?! We got shit to do around here, you know!”

You sighed and slipped your phone into your pocket. Dad was getting more irritable these days and he was right; you didn’t have time for wallowing.

“Coming….”

------------

[Text to: Rotten Bastard]: Maybe it’s better I don’t know where you are. I want to punch you right now

[Text to: Rotten Bastard]: My period was a week late and you really had me nervous

[Text to: Rotten Bastard]: Not that it would have mattered if I was pregnant. I don’t want kids and right now, I really don’t want yours

[Text to: Rotten Bastard]: If you do see these, I hope you thank your lucky stars I can’t reach your dumbass

After about a month, you’d gotten over the sadness and made your way to anger. How could he do this to you? How could he make that promise, taking you to dinner after your win, knowing how unlikely it would be for him to fulfill it? How dare he lead you on and make you think any of it was real? How fucking dare he ignore you?

You’d managed to turn your anger into something productive and channeled it into finding these fabled paths of medical-debt forgiveness. Who knew pure rage was enough to get you through hours of sitting on hold and dodging red tape bullets? Because you were angry. You were angry at Duke for leaving, your dad for being a stubborn mule, your siblings for being unhelpful, the world for being a goddamn fuck-fest, your life in general at the moment, etc.

Anyway, you'd managed to get a lot of those hospital bills forgiven and that was something to be happy about. There was still some left on the tab of course but it was more manageable. If only you could do that with the bank debts now looming over your head….

You were worried about your dad too. Good days were few and far between as the revenue slowed but the bills didn't change. With rodeo season ended, there wouldn't be more quick fixes for your finances for a while and that had both of you on edge. Add that to the looming reality that he'd have to sell some of his land to make it out of this year alright and…. Well, you could only imagine what was going through his head.

Plus...the anniversary of your mother's death was nearing. He always got more than a little down at this time of year and it made you nervous. He’d never admit he was having problems, but you could always see it. It’s part of why you always went with him when he visited Mom’s grave.

“Hey, Dad,” you said as he entered the kitchen one morning. “When do you want to head out?”

“Head out where?” he grumbled as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“To see Mom.”

He set the coffee pot down and took a long drink from his mug. “I’m not going this year.”

“I-Okay. If that’s what you want….” You chewed your lip. “Will you be okay around here if I go ahead?”

“Yep.”

You weren’t sure if you believed him or not but going to see her grave was a yearly tradition that you weren’t ready to let go of. Besides, you could use someone to talk to after everything. “Okay. I’ll probably go out after lunch then?”

“Whatever makes you happy, sweetheart. I love you.”

You smiled softly. “I love you too.”

You went out after lunch that day and spent a few lovely hours talking with your mom. Even if she couldn’t physically be there, you knew she was listening. You felt her warmth in the sunlight and heard her laugh in the breeze. It had been a long time since you let yourself feel this content with the way things were. Sure, they weren’t great. But they would get better. “This too shall pass”, right? You came back home feeling much lighter than you had that morning.

You didn’t think anything of it when you noticed Dad wasn’t in the house at first. It was still a while until dinner time and there was plenty of work to be done. You didn’t worry until it started to get dark and there was still no sign of him. Phone calls went unanswered and he wasn’t within yelling distance of the house, so you took Phillip and headed deeper into the property.

You found him about half an hour later. He was under the oak tree he and Mom had planted when they first got married almost 40 years ago. He almost looked peaceful, sitting against the trunk. If it weren’t for all the blood or the gun in his hand, he might’ve looked like he was taking a nap.

You don’t know how long you just sat there and stared. At some point, you got down and took a step towards him, only to crumple to your knees and sob. Phillip stayed with you, nuzzling your face gently as the tears flowed down your face.

It was a very long time before you found the strength to stand.

--------------

[Text to: Please Answer]: If I knew where you were, I would’ve gotten you out so just to have you here with me

[Text to: Please Answer]: Despite everything, I’d feel better if you were here. All I can think about is you hugging me or letting me curl up in your lap or even just standing near me.

[Text to: Please Answer]: I’d hate you for making me miss you all over again but I just miss you too much

“Who’s that?”

You jumped and dropped your phone at the sound of your sister’s voice so close to you ear. “Sophie, hey,” you said. “I- When did you get here?”

“Just a few minutes ago; David already took me around but we couldn’t find you,” she explained. “Who were you texting just now?”

How could you even begin to explain who Duke Culpepper was? “I- No one. You wouldn’t know him….”

She clearly didn’t want to accept that answer but your dad’s funeral was hardly the time to needle you for answers about anything. “How are you, Y/N?” she asked instead.

You shrugged. “I’m… I’m awful,” you replied honestly. “I- First it was Mom and then the ranch started going down and now Dad…. I have no idea how I’m gonna pay for this funeral or if Dad had a will or anything I’m- I- I don’t know what I’m doing.” It wasn’t like you to open up like this, even with your siblings, but after keeping it bottled up for so long you needed an outlet.

She nodded and pet your shoulder sympathetically. “I had a feeling. SO I’m gonna stick around for a bit and keep you company. Daniel will too. At least until we get everything settled and we know you’re going to be okay.”

Ordinarily, you’d get defensive about the idea that you wouldn’t be able to handle yourself, that you were just the little kid that needed looking after. But after recent events, you were glad for the offer. You knew the house would just feel too empty and big and scary with no one else in it and you didn’t even want to think about the ranch work. “Speaking of Daniel, where is he? I haven’t seen him since he got here….”

Sophie looked around. “Probably the kitchen. I’ll go get him and then we can start figuring out how to get these people out of here so we can have some proper mourning time. Will you be okay by yourself for a few minutes?”

You nodded. When she was gone, you reached for your phone to keep texting a number you knew wouldn’t answer but paused when someone else approached you. “Little Y/N?”

You looked up to see Abeline Walker. “Oh, hi. Yes, it’s me. Thank you for coming.” Abilene was an old friend of your mother’s, though you hadn’t seen her much in the last few years. It was understandable, given what her family had been dealing with lately. You knew her husband also had some dealings with your father, though you rarely saw him outside of business.

SHe smiled kindly. “Of course. I’m sorry about your father. He was a good man. I didn’t spend much time with him but your mother loved him to death and Bonham spoke highly of him.”

“That’s kind of you to say,” you murmured. Your dad was a good man, regardless of his stubbornness or his recent mental health issues. “Is Bonham here?”

She nodded. “Yes, he’s somewhere here. Oh, speaking of…” Abilene gently grasped your hand. “I want you to know that if you ever need anything, you can come to us. We’re just on the other side of the creek, practically neighbors.”

You nodded, a small smile pulling at your lips. “Thank you; that means a lot.”

--------------

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: I don’t know why I bother

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: You never answer. You don’t give me read receipts. I have no idea if you’ve even seen these.

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: And you’ll definitely never read these. Because you died. In a shoot out with the FBI. After you, apparently, got out of prison. Without telling me. And then you died.

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: I heard about it on Twitter

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: How fucked up is that?

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: I went from waking up next to you, to hearing about you from second-hand sources

[Text to: Duke Culpepper, RIP]: Do you do that to all the girls or am I just special?

A knock sounded on your door and you closed the pointless chat on your phone just in time for David to open the door. “You know, most people wait for an invitation before they enter a room,” you muttered as he entered.

“Older brother privileges,” he responded, setting a bowl of cereal on your night stand. “Do you feel like getting out of bed today?”

“Not particularly….”

He sighed and grabbed the stool from your vanity, pulling it over to the bed for what was definitely a Talk. “I...I know our relationship has been...strained over the years. You and Dad were always closer to each other than you were to me and Sophie and you were definitely more attached to this place than we ever could be. And…. Maybe I could’ve been nicer about the financial situation here. But- Look, Dad’s lawyer is coming by later to go over the will and we’d like it if you joined us.”

So there was a will. “I’ll be there.”

“I- Okay. I’ll see you there.” David left you alone until the lawyer came. You didn’t touch your cereal. You used the time to do some secret mourning for a man no one knew about. If Sophie and David found it odd that you didn’t bother wiping the tear tracks off your face when you came down to meet the lawyer, they didn’t say anything.

---------------

[Text to: Duke]: You know, I always thought about inviting you back here. Even with the arrest, I figured I could talk my Dad into giving you a job here. You were really good at clearing out stalls lol

[Text to: Duke]: I guess now I wouldn’t need Dad’s permission since he left it all to me. I could just hire you myself. Then again, I’d probably just be walking into an HR nightmare….

[Text to: Duke]: Jk

[Text to: Duke]: We don’t have HR ;)

Dad had left almost everything he had to you. He left you the land, the house , the business account, almost all of the money, even his old knick knacks. He split the rest of the money between David and Sophie and lef them a few of the things Mom left with him. Sophie got Mom’s wedding dress and David got her old sewing machine. You were just glad your siblings weren’t bugged by how little they got in comparison

Of course, it’s possible they were just glad they didn’t get the burden of responsibility for the mess your dad left. Things may have been worse than you thought; apparently, Dad had taken some money and played with the stock market. It had not gone well. You had to admire his attempt to help out without losing the things that meant the most to him, even if he didn’t really know what he was doing.

Unfortunately, it meant finishing this year out of the red was going to be a challenge, assuming it was even possible. You considered reaching out to David or Sophie but you weren’t sure if you really wanted to talk to them. After they went back to their respective lives, you felt reluctant to reach out. You loved them but it seemed like you really only ever talked with each other when things weren’t going well. Not anyone’s fault, just the way the chips fell. It sure left you feeling lonely though.

Abilene Walker’s words from the funeral came back to you suddenly. Could you....? No. They had enough of their own problems lately. Besides, you doubted they had much extra funds. They were ranchers too and even if they would be understanding, you couldn’t ask them to potentially dig themselves into a hole just to get you out of yours.

Still…. Maybe you could just reach out? Start a friendly conversation? Just...talk to someone? It might help you feel better to send a message to someone and actually hear back.

You called Abilene later that day. She didn’t answer but you left a voicemail asking if you could meet for lunch one day. You felt a little better once that was done.

------------

[Text to: Duke]: I can’t believe I still do this

[Text to: Duke]: Almost feels like I’m cheating on Abby, if I’m honest

[Text to: Duke]: Anyway

[Text to: Duke]: I’m selling the ranch. I don’t want to and I know Dad’s probably rolling in his grave right now. But I can’t keep this up anymore. The money’s not enough to cover the bills and the debts and everything. If I’m being honest, it’s either this or losing it to the bank.

[Text to: Duke]: Good news is, I’m selling it to people I trust. Fun fact: a good chunk of the land here used to belong to the Walkers before they had to sell land during the depression. Found that out when I was going through old records. Fun stuff.

[Text to: Duke]: I’m heading over there today to sign the papers and everything. I’ll let you know how it goes.

[Text to: Duke]: Christ. Maybe I should invest some of the leftover money in a therapist

You knocked on the door to the main house on the Walker property. You were surprised Abby and Bonham agreed to the sale so quickly, but apparently Bonham had been setting aside money to buy back the old Walker property for some time and he’d just been waiting for the opportunity. You were glad you could make the sale. You could clear out the remaining debts with the money and...figure out what to do with whatever you had leftover. Maybe you’d get a condo. No, wait, where would you put Phillip?

Whatever.

The paperwork was pretty straightforward. Bonham had his son, Liam, draw up everything properly. You just had to fill in the blanks on your side and sign your name and it would be done.

“What are you gonna do after this?” Bonham asked as you went over some of the fine print.

You shrugged. “I haven’t really thought about it much. Kind of just...taking it one step at a time, you know.”

He nodded. “Well…. If you’re up for it, I’m gonna need some extra hands handling the extra land. I’d be more than happy to give you a place here.”

The tears came as a surprise. It would be a dream to stay. Working on the ranch, being with Phillip, staying near the places you loved…. It was practically the perfect solution. “I- Thank you,” you whispered, fearful your voice would betray your emotions.

“Of course. Why don’t you-”

He was interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. “Daddy? I know I have a level somewhere but I can’t find it. Do you- Oh, hey.”

You looked up and did a double take. Logically, you knew this was one of Bonham’s sons. But his face…. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say this was Duke Culpepper back from the dead. And with a decent haircut.

But...why did it look like he recognized you too?

“Hey, Cordell. This is Y/N; she’ll be working here on the ranch from here on out. I’ll get that level while you two get to know each other.” Bonham left you alone to ponder what exactly you were looking at.

It couldn’t be.

“Y/N...I can explain.”

Explain?

“I was going to tell you, after the rodeo. But things didn’t go as planned and it all got really complicated and I didn’t want you implicated so I blocked and deleted your number so no one would question you but I forgot to write it down and I never actually got your address and then it just felt like too long and-”

“Stop,” you whispered. You didn’t understand what you were hearing. Or maybe you did and you just didn’t like it. Because if you did understand it and it was true….

If it was true, Duke Culpepper wasn’t dead. He never existed at all. And yet here he was, right in front of you, alive and well and still so fucking gorgeous.

“Y/N-”

“I said, stop.” You pushed past him, only stopping when he grabbed your arm. You wrenched away from him and slapped his cheek. “Don’t. Just- Just don’t,” you hissed. Then you ran out the door.

------------

[Text from: Unknown]: Y/N I can explain

[Text from: Unknown]: Please just talk to me

[Text from: Unknown]: I didn’t want you to find out like this

[Text from: Unknown]: Y/N?

[Text to: Unknown]: Fuck you

[Text to: Unknown]: Just

[Text to: Unknown]: Fuck. You.

You turned off your phone and curled up on your bed, tears flowing unbidden from your face. You didn’t want to cry over that worthless piece of garbage. So you cried for yourself, for everything that you gave him, everything you’d never get back.

You deserved the tears more than he ever would.

#whumptober2021 #no.9 #rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated #walker #fic #suicide tw #death tw #depression tw #cordell walker x reader #angst #it's complicated with a capital c

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mercurial-madhouse · 4 years ago

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Five Favs of 2020

Four beautiful souls, @lululawrence @harryanthus @hadestyles and @tomlinvelvetfics tagged me for this one! You know how much it means to me to be tagged, thank you! 🥺🥺🥺

RULES: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome work.

🖌📜

1) Three Days in February: Could I truly pick any other? This wee sleeper cell (yes, the pun is intended) Larry brought the most amazing people into my life and made it onto four top fics of 2020 lists despite being my first fic. I spent two days sobbing my eyes out about that one. I’m quite terrible at trying to sum up my own stuff, but @hadestyles ranted at me about this one:

“The plot is so unique and the fandom has always been ginger with toying with rare tropes but you crashed in with an out of the box fic with a slow burn, hitting head to a wall angst, I will strangle you idiots level of pining, please stfu before I die laughing banter, god they’re fucking ridiculous and relatable characters and then the mystery!!! There’s also the stifling sexual tension...at one point I had the urge to just throw them in a room and make them fuck it out. And YOU COULD WRITE IT BUT STEPHEN KING COULDN’T WRITE CH 13.”

😳🥺

I’m also still finding out that half the things I put in here as part of the story have actually happened in some form or another!? I’m mildly concerned about that.

Everyone who has given this beautiful darling a chance, you have my undying gratitude and likely a lot of tears and snot on your shoulder now from my overwhelmed wailing. But with luck, you were also too busy snorting out so much laughter to notice!

🖌 📜

B) Event Horizon: This one is my writing style at it’s most unrestrained. It’s only 4k because it’s so intense even I couldn’t handle more than that. Not only that, but I put a massive plot twist in this one that as far as I know got everyone!!! \o/

I love magical realism and messing with tropes, so this one flips the soulmate trope on its head while still having a happy ending. I’m quite proud of that. As @harryanthus described it: “Along with a soulmate you gain powers that you have no control over and no one teaches you how because it’s different for everyone and when you find someone who is supposed to stay by your side and help you face it, you just depend on them. In the thrill of being in a relationship healthy boundaries get blurred and it is hard to admit that you need HELP, so H and L admitting that they cannot do it alone and need help is brave.”

I’d love to see the idea turned into a full feature-length fic too. Not necessarily my universe, but the idea! Any takers? 👀

🖌 📜

III) Christmas Idiots : Wrote this one on a whim for the 1DChristmasFest and almost scrapped it too! It has my brand of action in it, but it’s also the softest and fluffiest thing I’ve written to date. My favorite about this one is that I wanted to create a fic you could curl up with in front of a fire all cozy and just enjoy the winter feelz. From what I can tell, I’ve succeeded in that! I also absolutely love that everyone calls it Christmas Idiots, because that isn’t even the official title! 🤣

🖌 📜

Then) Fractured: Officially the first fest for me, ToT! Only 666 words, if you’ve read and seen the word count on TDIF, you’ll see why that’s such an accomplishment. It was my first foray into Louis’s POV and I managed to pack so many clues and emotions into this one and I’m just super proud of how it turned out.

🖌 📜

Finally) Interlude: One Night In March : This is the closest to a complete PWP I’ve come. All my fics straddle fine lines ( 😉 ) and this one is no different. Even this one has clues and twists because all is not what it seems and that makes me so happy!

Ah, the tags. You know me. I want every single content creator out there posting their pride in their work. And I want to see it and share in your pride! So I’m tagging every creator off the top of my head that has come across my tumblr whether this is a first time tag or I tag you even though you’ve never interacted. I still want to support you. Please, please if you see this and I missed you (It’s really hard keeping track of an entire fandom of creators), do it anyway and tag me!!! There are some people I can’t tag although I’d love to, so please pass this on to @cupcakentea @jaerie and @thepolourryexpress for me, at least so they know I was thinking of them too?

@2tiedships2 @allwaswell16 @absoloutenonsense @beau-soleil-louis @bearmustard @chrysopon @becomeawendybird @brightgolden @chloehl10 @crinkle-eyed-boo @dinosaursmate @disgruntledkittenface @doncasterkitten @falsegoodnight @haztobegood @hiccoops @homosociallyyours @jacaranda-bloom @kingsofeverythingmain @larryissocute @laynefaire @lesbianiconharrystyles @lil0 @londonfoginacup @louandhazaf @local-troubled-writer @louloubabys1992 @loustarlight @louistomlinboo @mizzhydes @outropeace @persephonelouis @quelsentiment @raspberryoatss @rosewithdagger @runaway-train-works @scrunchyharry @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed @soldouthaz @solvetheminourdreams @tempolarriefix @theisolatedlily @twopoppies @uhohmorshedios @vintageumbroshirt @whenthebodiesspeak @yvesaintlourent @zannithinks

#goals and achievements #tag game #my fiction #three days in february #event horizon #Christmas Idiots #Fractured #long post is long #also thank you for tagging me!#you know how emotional I get about tags #(that's my new tag for being tagged apparently)#2020

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edges-posts · 4 years ago

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Biskit has been missing from the last 2 episodes. They really shouldn't have added him to the main cast, especially when they killed off Fox AND the squad is already massive.

Man, in all the chaos and emotions happening in the latest episode I totally forgot about Biskit. I didn’t notice until you bought it up. Good eye. Especially to spot something like that during the angst fest in this episode is pretty cool.

But yeah. I agree with you 100%. It was already hard enough for the writers to balance the main cast. That’s the entire reason they made Sheryl take a backseat. I can understand them adding Kevin Van Newton to the show cause, it’s obvious that no one knows how to operate a hyper-transdimensional bridge and no one knew how to get out of final space.

I guess they added Biskit cause in the episode, "All the moments lost", he did help Avocato and little Cato to draw energy to charge the Galaxy 2 in order for it to light fold away. But I am pretty sure H.U.E could have guided them through it. After all, he is the ship’s A.I.

Biskit hasn’t really played much of a part in the season so far. But I guess we will just have to keep watching to see if he does in the later episodes.

#final space #gary goodspeed #final space season 3 #avocato #little cato #sheryl goodspeed #fox #ash graven #mooncake #bolo #quinn ergon

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dramionecommentfest · 4 years ago

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Reader Profile: Kiwi05622

The Dramione Comment Fest is the fest where readers take center stage! We’re excited to feature profiles of some of our readers throughout the course of the fest. First up, we have the most delightful and lovely @kiwi05622!

Location: Middle East Hogwarts House: Slytherin Pronouns: she/her When did you start reading Dramione? How did you originally find fics to read? I started reading in 2017… I think. Or was it 18? I'm not sure anymore. But one of those years lol! So yes, I'm still relatively new to the fandom. But I have devoured so much that it's come to the point where all the stories I've read have started to mingle with each other, and I can't tell you which story is which unless it had a massive impression on me and stood out. How did I find fics? I had this friend of mine, who was a closeted fic reader (I will never forgive her for not introducing me to this world sooner) that kept on dropping these obscure hints my way whenever Harry Potter would come up in our discussions, which was often. She would call me and ask what I'm doing, and my answer would either be, I'm reading HP, or watching one of the movies. She never once judged me or asked me why I'm spending so much time re-reading and rewatching, and I love her for that. One night, she got a little frustrated with me when I whined about NEEDING MORE of it, and she snapped. She was like KIWI JUST GIVE ME TWO CHARACTERS THAT YOU LOVE, and I shyly replied Hermione and Draco? She had the audacity to sigh (she is not a Dramione lover by any means). She sent me a link to Ao3 with a message "Welcome to my life, and I wish you luck stepping foot inside this black hole. Bye.” because I didn't know better. I didn't know what I was getting myself into, I clicked on the FIRST link I found, and this is how Bleak Manor by Pushthebutton became the first story that made me -surprisingly- fall in love with Dramione and fan fiction. How have you gotten more involved in the Dramione community? What platforms/websites have you participated in, and which do you like? I'm not VERY involved in the fandom, if I'm honest. I'm an introvert by nature. Even though I started reading years ago, I only started joining Facebook groups last year. From there, I stumbled onto Tumblr (which was the weirdest platform I've ever been on, but now I LOVE IT), which then led me to Discord. This is where I'm currently stationed. I'm not as active as I used to be on Facebook. I also reached out to many people on Discord and found friends that I no longer call "internet friends," and I find it easier to communicate to authors over there.

Tell us about any reading preferences or practices! Okay, I won't talk about my past habits, because looking back, it was really unhealthy. But I remember I used to read at every waking hour; I would only *sleep* to generate energy to keep ongoing: Goodbye food and social life. However, now, I dedicate time to reading, and it's usually 2 hours before I sleep. So I'll have dinner, and then open up my kindle and read until my eyes can't stay open. My days are usually spent talking to friends and doing many things that need to get done. I started off reading with my laptop until my boyfriend got annoyed by the bright lights emanating from my screen (honestly I didn't even think about reading from my phone). He later suggested reading from the iPad, and I stuck to that for a fair bit, until one night, I ran out of battery, and I couldn’t find the charger, so I reluctantly read from my phone, which I later obviously loved. I could read on the train, while making dinner, taking a walk (because we all need to exercise at some point). Then, after my boyfriend was SURE this wasn't just a phase, and I'll probably be reading for the rest of my life, he surprised me with a kindle, and the rest is history.

Do you like to leave comments? If so, what is your advice for leaving comments? If I'm completely honest with you, sometimes. I'm guilty of moving on from a chapter to chapter without taking a moment to comment. Telling myself that I'll go back and let the author know how much I enjoyed this part or that part. But I forget. Once I'm done with a story, I want to MOVE ON to the next one. However, in the past year, I've made an active effort to write down everything I feel on my phone while I read on my kindle, so I can go back and paste my review. That’s the other thing, I read SO much from my kindle, that it makes it so easy to forget to go back online and submit a review. And with Discord, I usually read with my friends, and sometimes the author will be there while we talk, theorise and flail all over their work. It's a much more interactive experience. I think authors would prefer that over a thank you. This isn't to say that a thank you doesn't go a long way or isn't appreciative, but honestly, how many times can an author say you're welcome? Or thank you for reading? This takes me to the second part of your question. The one advice I would give is, don't expect a response back. Do it because you genuinely liked it. Suppose we keep expecting and wanting the author to respond, especially if a chapter gets SO MANY reviews. In that case, it might seem disheartening to the reviewer, and they're left feeling unseen or that their review was lacking, which isn't the case most of the time. Tell them how it made you feel, which parts did you love, which string of emotion was plucked and left vibrating in your chest. Tell them that. But also, saying a simple thank you is enough. Personally, I would go to the last chapter and tell the author how much I've enjoyed their story if it's a story that was posted years or months back. If it's a story published years ago and they seem inactive, I would slide into their DMs and flail all over the story. You'd be surprised how many actually respond.

What is your all-time favorite fic you’ve read? ALL TIME FAVOURITE is such a difficult question to answer. So I’ll compromise and tell you which one I really really really LOVE but also list a few that I can't be parted with. If my room was caught on fire and I had all these stories in front of me and I had to only choose ONE I would say Risk Reward Ratio by @MissiAmphetamine and its sequel! Okay, I know I cheated, but *sigh* honestly I love it. And I’m not sorry about it either. It's not what you would typically hear because it's not really a fluffy story and there are some questionable actions, plots and let’s not start discussing their relationship. But you see, I enjoy a story that questions my morals sometimes, where I find myself asking “what would I do in this situation?” Plus, as you’ll see below, I have a thing for angst with a happy ending. That being said, I also love love love these stories and they each hold meaning to me, because I've read them at various stages of my life:

Redemption by @anondracomalfoy (wonderfully written story and very enjoyable!!! It’s a memory trope mixed with some suspense)

Revert by SUPRNTRAL LVR (this is when I found out that I can actually cry while reading a story lol)

Remain Nameless by @heyjude19-writing (I will FOREVER love this story and no one can taint it for me. If you ONLY knew how much this story means to me *cough* I spent every moment I wasn’t reading this making her moodboards that's how much it moved me *cough*)

The Art of Betrayal by @hathawaywrites

Across The Hall by @takingflight48 (this one just hold a special place in my heart)

Thirteenth Night by Nelpher (This is the story that changed my mind about memory loss trope which is my LEAST favourite)

Nightmares and Nocturnes by @olivieblake (one of the most creative and unique war stories ever written)

Hindsight by @floorcoaster (This changed my mind about T rated stories)

Broken by @inadaze22 (this taught me a lesson to READ THE TAGS, but the pain was worth it)

Sugar and Spice by @inlovewithforever (ummmm do I need to say more? This is one of the best triads I've ever read)

Looking Glass by @kyonomiko (Every time I'm in a rut I go back to THIS and it never fails to bring me back to life and remind me why I fell in love with these two. It's light hearted, funny and has my second OTP. it's a win-win for me)

Find Your Way Back by @willhavetheirtrinkets (Musyc) (I will forever rec this story to everyone)

Pound of Flesh by @pennilynnovus (HELLO STRIPPER DRACO! This one tore my heart out, I love it!)

Honestly, the list can go on and on and on. There are just SO many good ones out there that I haven't mentioned yet, but I wanted to list only a few that I will always go back and re-read. Also, just because I haven't mentioned the ones that we keep seeing everywhere, doesn't mean I didn't enjoy them or loved them!

What fic gave you the most feels? Definitely “Risk Reward Ratio.” It gave me SO much feels. Some were good, and some were pretty bad. It took me on a wild roller coaster ride. I was happy, sad, angry, happy, sad, angry. I laughed hard in some places, I cried even harder in others, I wanted to pull my hair out MOST of the time, and some parts were oh so good the butterflies wouldn't settle the fuck down. But ehh I like what I like, and I'm unapologetic about it. :D

Who is your favorite side character from any Dramione fic? This one is easy! Theo-fucking-Nott! Without a shadow of a doubt. You want to make him the most awesome sidekick character, go right ahead. The best bro, be my guest. The one that has secret feelings for Hermione? GIVE ME THAT TRIAD!!!!! You dare to make him evil? FUCK YES! I'm SO here for it. Even if he is one, I will STILL love him. I always get slightly giddy when Theo makes an appearance, and I tend to enjoy the story that much more. He's an interesting character to me because he's ambiguous. Canon never gave us much about his personality and reading how everyone interprets him makes him one the most versatile characters in my humble opinion. :D

Last question: Do you really like kiwis?? Hahaha!!!! Yes, I really do. This name was given to me by the people who were worried I had a mild obsession with kiwis. You don't have to ask me what I need from the store, because my answer would always be “we've run out of kiwis, BRING ME SOME MORE.” However, let me just make it clear that I'm not a heathen and I don't eat them with their skin on (no judgment if you do).

Thank you so much, Kiwi, for sharing with us! The Dramione community is lucky to have you <3

Don’t forget, sign ups for the Dramione Comment Fest close February 6, 2021. Check out the rules here and sign up for the fest here.

#dramione comment fest #dramione #dramione fanfic #dramione fest #reader profile #we heart readers #kiwi is the best #we heart kiwi #dramione fanfic recommendations

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silentprincess17 · 4 years ago

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Sometimes Things Have to Get Worse Before They Get Better

This is essentially a darker, heavier alternate take on Memory #7 - Blades of the Yiga. I wanted to write a fic with a competent Yiga Clan. (Yes you read that right). It is very angsty in the beginning and then becomes fluffy (hence the title!)

Summary: Link and Zelda have returned from Vah Naboris with Urbosa and have spent the night in Kara Kara Bazaar Inn. Link wakes up and finds her missing.

Cue the angst.

This story is complete and I will post each chapter daily on here but you can read the whole thing on AO3

Rating: Mature (Graphic descriptions of violence) Pairing: Link/Zelda (Zelink) Characters: Link, Zelda, The Yiga Clan, Master Kohga

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

Chapter 7: Dawn of the Second Day

TW: Huge wounds, massive haemorrhage (a lot of blood loss yes I am a medic geek) and pain. Also Nintendo owns Legend of Zelda and some of the dialogue used. Please don't sue me.

This time, they teleported in, grabbed him, and teleported out.

Zelda screamed his name, but it got lost in the vortex of red paper slips, as he felt his insides split apart and then reform.

He was glad though. Incredibly glad that they’d taken him and not his Princess. He ended up on the floor, in the big arena that wasn’t an arena and he coughed, trying to get the sand out of his mouth, and eyes.

He heard Zelda shouting for him, and it suddenly hit him-this was it. The perfect opportunity. He could try and get her out. He was outside Hylia above!

And just as he thought that, four giant metal clamps locked onto his limbs. And that same cursed red glowing thing was applied so he couldn’t move. He swore at them but stopped struggling. He would have to bide his time, he already felt a little weak from not eating for three days, so every store of energy was precious right now. He had to wait for the perfect opportunity and then unleash it all.

He took a moment to try and calm down. Think things through. He was outside the cell, that was better than being inside. He just had to be observant and careful. He started by trying to determine what their motive was, but he wasn’t sure what was happening. Why had they decided to take him out, if they were only going to restrain him down again?

He looked up, at least they hadn’t clamped his neck. And then a… well. There was no polite way to think of him, if Link was being honest. And frankly, being polite was really quite low down in his list of concerns at the minute.

The Yiga Clan were... normally, at least, easily categorisable. All the Yiga Foot soldiers were thin, agile, capable of moving at lightning speed with their teleportation. The Blademasters were by comparison much larger, and they wielded the more powerful windcleaver. And now he knew of the researchers, but they looked a lot like the Foot soldiers, just with a red lab coat on.

This man… although dressed as a Yiga, didn’t match one of the above categories. He was, well, fat. He had a huge abdomen, which Link didn’t really see working in a fight, either with a sickle or a windcleaver and he was confused really. It was the most bizarre thing he’d seen since arriving.

Link wondered if the lack of food was getting to him.

“Yeah, IT'S YOU! You're that Link guy I've been looking for! And the Princess of course but she’s BORING."

Uh… what? This guy had been… looking… for him? Not to sound egoistical, but wasn’t it really obvious who he was? He literally wore bright blue and had the Master Sword strapped to his back. Admittedly, he didn’t have those two things right now but…

"I need to bust out my serious moves... A secret technique taught by my mother's father! It will...destroy you!"

Uh yeah. It probably would do that because Link was currently strapped to the floor with no weapons. So, whatever this guy chose to do, it would, in all likelihood, work by default.

“Release him from the magnesis bonds! NO WAIT! I need to finish my speech first!”

This man was starting to get on Link’s nerves, like a bratty child who wanted a sweet. But he just said to release his bonds. Yes, if that happened, he would destroy them all, steal all their weapons, physically break down those bars, rescue his Princess and then hightail it out of the desert. So, he would remain calm. Collected. And not think of what happened yesterday.

“Now. Hero of Hyrule. I will DUEL you. So someone told someone who told someone yada yada yada that I should give you a fair chance, and something testing something Princess, I'm not sure, I fell asleep half-way through, so here we are. Of course, you’re a KNIGHT so I assume you know what a DUEL is!"

Link remained silent. He figured it probably wouldn't work in his favour if he started to laugh.

"You know, your silence really is unnerving. ANYWAY, I will fight with my chosen weapons, and you will be provided with a Duplex Bow, ten arrows, a Vicious Sickle and a Windcleaver. A very generous selection, in my opinion. If you defeat me, I will allow you to walk away.” Link’s eyes widened. “YES, WALK AWAYYY!” He laughed, “I won’t kill you to DEATH! Even-if-that's-what-I-really-want-can-you-imagine-being-named-Top-Banana-Of-The-Yiga-Clan-comma-Slayer-Of-The-Hero!”

Okay yeah, there was clearly something wrong with this guy, but Link focussed on the important parts. A Duel. Of which the outcome would be freedom. But. He hadn’t mentioned Zelda. No matter, Link would be a fool not to accept. He’d defeat this fat lug and then Kill. Them. All.

And those Blademasters that had stood on that cursed table? He’d make sure to find his sword and would ensure they suffered a slow, prolonged death. But first, he’d win, take Zelda to the Castle where she’d be safe, and then he’d come back. And exterminate them like the rats they were.

He nodded.

They dropped the connection, freeing him, and he didn’t try anything. Not yet anyway. Once they gave him weapons though, Link would forgo whatever pact he’d made with this man. This didn’t count as an honourable situation anyway, this wasn’t a duel between Knights, it was a duel between captor and captee.

What he hadn’t been expecting, was the fat man to throw a small capsule in the middle of the hole, and the capsule didn’t fall, no, it hovered in place. And the outlines of a dome formed, it extended from the centre of the seemingly bottom-less hole and spread out to include a small ring of sand around said hole. All of a sudden, sound seemed to stop coming through, and he could barely hear Zelda, although maybe she’d come to realise it was futile and had gone quiet.

The capsule made a clicking noise, like an activation of something, and then a burst of red light cascaded from it, down the dome, forming a crimson-lined grid along the surface, almost like red electricity was crawling along the lines. They connected to metal ridges that Link hadn’t even noticed in the sand. He swallowed. He knew, instinctively, that he wouldn’t be able to escape. He wouldn’t be able to get out. Because it was the same thing that had trapped him in those cuffs.

It would have to be honourable. By default.

Still, Link wasn’t feeling that scared. If the fat man wanted a duel, Link would give it to him.

“In the name of Calamity Ganon!” He pranced around, shimmying from one foot to the other. "That's what you say when you start a DUEL right?!"

Link decided to ignore him, and simply looked over to where he thought the Princess was, the red light made it hard to see. “In the name of Princess Zelda Bosphoramus Hyrule, my charge, my liege… my Princess.” And his heart whispered one more thing, my soulmate.

It had started out well enough, the man simply summoned rocks at him, not unlike an octorok, but these ones were considerably larger, with a glowing upside down Sheikah eye on them. Still, he dispatched the obnoxious man in quick time, shooting a well-timed arrow into his head, and then jumping in bullet-time to attack with the sickle.

And then the fat man got angry, stamping his foot into the ground like a child having a tantrum. He moved to hover on top of the hole, and this time he had a blue barrier. Link had wasted one arrow hitting it, only for it to bounce right off. Useless. And there was no way for Link to jump in, seeing as he was without his paraglider and he'd fall down anyway, not sideways to the centre of the abyss where the man was.

So, he bid his time, going as far back as possible and decided to just observe the attack. He remained calm, although for some reason he was a little more flustered than he ordinarily was. Perhaps because the Princess’s safety relied on this fight. Yes, that wasn’t an unusual occurrence, but normally, she’d be hidden, well-protected, should anything go wrong with him. This time… If he failed, then who knew what the consequences would be.

He refocussed, the next move simply involved two rocks hovering horizontally and then vertically to the man, where his barrier faulted for a split second, just before he chucked them at Link. It was easy enough to dodge, and now Link knew what to do. He simply hit the man when the barrier was down, and the Yiga lost control of the rocks, so they hit him instead. After another couple of rounds, where Link looked worryingly at his meagre five remaining arrows, another tantrum fest occurred, this time jumping up and down with one foot whilst floating. Link rubbed his eyes in case he was hallucinating. No, he wasn’t.

And that is where everything went wrong.

The man was now using that accursed red thing to move a giant metal ball at him. The ball had spikes. Huge ones at that. And despite Link keeping his eyes trained on the man, his barrier did not fall. Not once.

Crap.

How?! How could the Yiga mentally control metal?! How was he supposed to defeat him now?

The spiked sphere continued to crawl after him, a slow and steady reminder of what was coming. Link was trying hard not to panic. What else could he do? He didn’t have any of his other weapons. He didn’t have shock arrows. He didn’t have his bomb bag. Maybe he could parry the sphere? But he didn’t have a shield either. He cried, almost, thinking back to his prized Hylian shield sitting in the Inn at Kara Kara Bazaar.

What else what else what else

He knew one thing for certain though. He wouldn’t be able to keep up running forever. Not as weak as he currently was from all the stresses over the past two days and the lack of food. Yes, the sphere moved slowly. But it moved. And eventually he would tire.

The man took back the sphere and Link aimed, hoping his barrier would come down for one second, but no. All he did was pause before sending the sphere. Straight. Back. At. Him.

Goddesses above he wouldn’t last.

Was this his true Hero trial?

Was this how he would die?

He decided to try to use the windcleaver to generate some gush of air that would what? Move the giant ball? He was crazy enough to at least attempt because what else could he do? None of his weapons would even reach the man, even if he chucked them, let alone penetrate the seemingly solid blue barrier.

He ran to the edge of the dome, hoping to be a little out of the ball's range to give him some breathing room should this go wrong, but he had no such luck, because it came, hard and fast for him. He waited until it came close then swung the blade down and tried to repel it.

It obviously failed; no colossal, incredibly heavy, metallic sphere was going to shift with the mere power of air.

Belatedly, he realised that the fat man could afford to be fat. Who was going to hurt him if he could levitate himself out into a pit of no end so there was no hope of reaching him, put up a barrier that you had no hope of penetrating, trap you in a hemisphere so you were effectively at his mercy and was armed with a deadly weapon only he could control?

Link only had just about enough time to turn, for his fingers to hit the dome, before the spikes rammed into his back and Link heard himself scream.

He was used to pain, he thought distantly. He’d hurt himself so many times, from climbing accidents, to training mishaps, to when he’d first started fighting monsters, especially those Goddess damned Lynel swords, oh, wait, no, the crushers were worse.

But he’d never had enormous sharp cones ram into his back, upper thigh and calves, all at once. He was effectively pinned against the dome. And then the ball was pulled out, and shoved right back in.

And again.

And then for flavour, the fat man shifted it just to the right, so now his wounds grew and grew, until he was slowly ripped apart, until the only thing actually holding him upright was the metal sphere.

Link lost track of everything. He’d never felt so humiliated, so weak.

He’d never lost a fight.

What would happen now? What would happen to him and Zelda?

He felt wet, lethargic and so, so heavy. Which struck him as odd, especially considering he’d probably lost a lot of blood. Shouldn’t he be light?

Little spots of blackness coated his vision, somehow he blinked and he was on the floor, on his knees, the dome gone, his hands shaking trying to hold himself up. His blood rushed through his ears, thundering too loudly, and everything else was muted, muffled, and he could no longer focus properly.

"-oga! Did you se- I did i-"

Link must have blacked out again, because the next thing he knew he was being hauled by his armpits back into the cell, and his injuries were stretched even more, and Link screeched in pain. He was so far gone it was silent, and he lost consciousness yet again, because he practically fell on top of Zelda, landing on his front, in her arms. She was shaking, maybe? Or was it him? Probably him, but he couldn’t tell, and he heard her furiously mutter under her breath about hypo-something shock, but really, he was barely holding onto the few remaining threads of consciousness he had.

“Link?” She sounded frightened, but he couldn’t bring himself to respond. Instead, when he opened his mouth, he coughed up an alarming amount of blood. He felt some of it dribble down his chin and he heard her half scream in response.

“LINK! No! In - name of Hylia st- with me! Link!” She gently held his head in her hands, his head rolling in her hold because he'd now lost what little control he had over his muscles. He focussed on the softness of her touch, and how it contrasted so deeply to the agony that he was in, although everything was dulled around the edges right now, probably from the blood loss. He stared at the growing pool of bright crimson around them, it seemed to be coming from everywhere. Like he was a dam that had suffered too many hits and now all the water was leaking through. That wasn’t that far from the truth to be fair.

“Zel-” He tried to say something, to reassure her that he would fight to stay awake. But it ended in another, harsher, coughing fit, and it felt like Daruk had grasped his chest in his hands and squeezed. Dear Goddesses, he felt his vision start to fade again, it was already half faded, in all honesty. And it scared him, because this wasn't the same blackness he'd had after being knocked cold from a fight. This was darker, more permeating. It felt... more permanent.

She cried, and it pained him to see her tears for him, but the blackness forced its way upon him, and he slowly closed his eyes, trying his hardest not to give in, but even from the start he knew it was a losing battle. Vaguely he wondered if the sword would remember him. He wondered what would happen to his family, to Hyrule, to her, if there was no Hero for the Calamity. He wondered, if he'd had more time, more courage, if he and Zelda could have-

She cradled his head in her arms, gently brushing his matted hair away from his forehead, and he allowed himself a final deep breath, for her lavender to imprint in his mind one last time.

Link was not... scared of death. He knew it was inevitable, and there was a significant probability of him dying, either in the line of duty to the Crown, or against the Calamity, his destiny-chosen battle. But... he was scared now. He was scared of what the consequences of him dying meant. Her verdant eyes stared at him, and she was saying something but he could no longer hear. She was his biggest regret, he couldn't stomach leaving her, here and now, because who knew what horrors would await her once he left. So much guilt, so much shame, so much despair hit him, in the final moment but there was nothing left to he done. He tried to convey that to her, through his gaze, that he was sorry, for not being enough, for not doing enough, for failing to get her out of here- the list continued, but he was rapidly losing what little control he had left, and he felt his eyes glaze over. He’d seen enough death to know where he stood. Because everything ached, he felt increasingly weaker, and his breathing grew progressively more ragged, as stabs of pain shot up his ribs for every centimetre he inhaled in.

He gasped for air, one final time, trying to commit her to his memory, and that seemed to be the very last assault his body could handle. Because within seconds he lost all sense of the world, his final thought was of his silent princess, and of a lullaby, that would forever haunt him till the end of time.

#zelink #botw zelink #botw #botw link #botw zelda #pre-calamity #yiga clan #master kohga #Alternate take on Memory 7 - Blades of the Yiga #angst with a happy ending #enemies to friends to lovers #more so understanding enemies?#heavy angst #angst and feels #some fluff intermixed because i am incapable of writing pure angst #selectively mute link #slow burn #mutual pining #link's pov

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