#and uses it as an intimidation factor above anything else. one more secret he can convince people is a threat to them rather than himself

[toastytrusty]

hickey wanting nothing more than to be seen and recognized yet going the entire voyage pretending to be someone he wasn't. even the status he tries to procure through the naval command hierarchy and then in his mutiny is still Not His. and in the end when he knows everyone around him is about to die he finally admits to not being who he says he is because he Needs Them To Know. he needs to be seen and recognized in his true self so that he can finally personally claim everything he has done here as his. something about his want vs need being a want to persuade and convince vs a need to be seen and recognized. he creates a fabrication of his identity to better sell himself to the people around him and get them to like admire respect him whatever it is, to make the voyage easier and bolster his ego. but that's so contrary to the whole reason he went on the voyage, which was to prove himself and gain some self respect in a world that he feels has mistreated him. but he didn't even go on the voyage as himself, and abandoned his past self and the mistreatment he faced when he made the decision to pretend to be someone else. he put ease and whatever illusion he held about a career navy man being more respectable than some rando on his first voyage over authenticity and genuine self betterment. he's so terribly self destructive and weak willed and insecure and draws the worst out of himself by being too afraid to ever be true to himself

[urautismdiagnosis-wistie]

Pokes u

Do you have Barnacles Headcanons to share with his wife (aka me)

YES also sorry for the late response lol uhhh this is mostly just stuff from my au lol and its got different world building than the show does

Ok first off some context, in my au the reasons for PEOPLE species to have different traits is more based on environmental factors and conflicts between other groups of people. 👌

There are definitely some wild species that aren't even intelligent enough to have nearly any sapience (in simple terms its self awareness) that would probably end up being food or wtv, but like going based off of irl stuff polar bears mostly need high fat diets and unless there are a TON extra of high fat food fish thatd make the arctic pretty hard to survive

Unless ofc 👀 well they are PEOPLE people so u can convince me they'd have somehow domesticated either musk or (hoofed arctic animal) or bred some other kind of milk producing animal as a source of food

All I'm saying is that he could and would and has eaten an entire wheel of cheese before

And he absolutely has a secret stash of high fat snacks because I think he might be a liiiiittttle bit self conscious about it

Because he realized that arctic animals and non arctic animals have HUGE differences in social norms and apparently most animals don't have at least 3 inches of fat minimum on their entire body???

And its not cuz hes embarrassed of the fat, its normal and healthy, he just doesn't want to go from Trustworthy and Reliable Captain of thr Octonauts to "oh my god i need like an entire cheesecake rn to feel normal" in front of everyone cuz like 😭 he is a bit of a comfort eater. Like ah yes our strong and level headed captain is eating an entire box of oreos at 2 am because he misses his sister again 😭

Ofc the others do find out but there isn't any judgement if anything kwazii would probably join him, bro has a history of having weird food habits (hm wonder why... surely nothing related to being shipwrecked on an island and having to survive) and its nice

He does like, have THE best snacks tho and he might be hoarding them just a tiny bit-

he also can feel a bit worried about coming off as too large or intimidating so thats why he's always got his hands on his hips- and his head lowered down a bit

its not that he seems like physically scary but a larger presence can be intimidating for a lot of people

Teeth and claws aren't usually seen as intimidating in most scenarios in this world because its so common and is just like a feature of the species the same way hearing or smell can be btw

so yeah someone threatening to scratch ya can be scary but so can someone being able to find you because they can hear ur heartbeat 💀🙏

Back to the main point, like all the other octonauts aren't even like medium sized animals (like wolves and whatever), there ALL very small species. So hes like way in the upper range, the highest and tallest possible species while everyone else are all smaller ones specifically

So if barnacles is Actually Mad (💀 the scenario to make him genuinely mad has to be BAD) then he will go to his FULL HEIGHT

Cuz irl polar bears got very tall strong necks and etc so I think him standing at Full Serious Height would be very startling

Also about polar bears sense of smell!

Circling back to the adaptations being related to survival pressures and social ones

Polar bears in this world, use their sense of smell for something very important in the arctic: navigation, above and below water

It prevents things like getting lost in the wintery white world, which is so so easy for others. It can help find others than might be lost, and it can tell u if they r injured or not and I think thats precious

there is one problem tho, while their sense of smell is VERY strong, stronger than bloodhounds and etc, its made for being able to detect things very far away in freezing temperatures... so they're extremely sensitive

Which wouldn't be that much of an issue if barnacles wasn't in all sorts of more tropical environments...

In thr artic all u can smell is other people, animals, and which was is home

But if he's not in the octopod or under the water,but somewhere where there's THOUSANDS of insects,hundreds of pollinating plants, and tons and tons of different creatures all at once-

I think thats be overwhelming and he's probably be allergic to sooooooo many plants poor guy 🥺

Also even tho he like trims and thins out his thick coat, and even has a little cooling pack vest sort of thing under his uniform he can still overheat pretty easily

Cuz yk, the several inches of brown fat or blubber? Someone might say "hey just adjust ur diet and whatever to lose it" but that would be VERY UNHEALTHY for him... mess with the balance of his bodys systems yk? so its really not an option;^;

So yeah he still tends to overheat and thats why having his room canoncially set to actual arctic temperatures every night helps him sleep better and feel better

Usually alot of octonauts missions happen under water or in gups or maybe they'll spend some time on an island and it'll be hot

But with extended time spent in warmer climates he has to take alot more breaks and it can be alot harder for him

Also I think that he had a period in his early 20s college years where he was like kinda lowkey depressed because he was learning more about global warming and capitalism

, it didn't last too long fortunately because yk he met professor inkling who was already developing his idea for the octonauts

and they actuslly became really good friends and it really came together as a realistic thing when tweak got wind of em

On a more depressing note global warming for polar bears in a world where they're actual people with a unique culture and heritage means some totally different stuff

Like its not even the fact they can't even engage in their own cultural traditions (cough traveling in that one arctic global warming special where they were all exhausted cuz all the melted sea ice cough)

Its also the loss of genuine homes (in my au they're kinda like ice hobbit houses 🥰since polar bears irl will dig out shallow resting spots or mama bears will have dens with a toasty 30 degrees farenheit), architectural collapses, traditional jobs that can only be done in the arctic being lost, and being forced into more southern grounds because more and more just can't rely living there anymore

And I think that'd be super depressing to see in real time, its a cultural death

Heck even irl there's so many grizzlies going north and polar going south that they've actually started to mix and start having hybrids (grolar bears). And the thing is they're so genetically compatible that their species can actually develope into their own separate identity that might totally replace most if not all polar bears sense they're just more adapt to the changing climate and have more range,with benefits from both species

And while that sounds great on paper and makes sense and is obviously fine for them to have easier lives, I think in thr context of this world it would leave barnacles with some conflicted feelings

Because the thing is there used to be concerns about polar bears having to leave their homes to live is societies and communities that just... that their jobs wouldn't fit to. That would be physically harder for them to be healthy in. That they'd have to give up so many thousands of years of traditions thatd be impossible to carry over in.

Idk its late and I've got one braincell and idk if this makes sense and im sorry if it got depressing 😭

But yeah, so there's more and more of these younger people grolar bears, that just... will never have that full connection to their heritage. And idk I think its sad and maybe I'm projecting

Also I think that if barnacles was ever sad he'd just cope by playing the accordian lol,like the one meme of the girl playing "its a mental breakdown ✨" on a kazoo 😭

Let's end this on a happier note tho, circling back to barnacles being several feet taller than his entire crew, like-

We all already know this guy emotionally adopts every living being in sight

And well, his ENTIRE CREW literally, and I mean very literally and physically, looks up to him-

Like they all gotta turn their heads up and loon at him with big hopeful eyes ready for whatever he has to say

And im gonna be honest his composure is alot stronger than mine cux I would CRY because of how adorable that is

Like he knows its probably so unprofessional and might be seen as condescending BUT DAMN IT HE CANT HELP THR CUTENESS AGRESSION!!! HE WANTS TO SQUISH THEIR TINY FACES!!!

so sometimes hell have a very Serious and Leadership-like Captain Conversation, and then thr SECOND hes out of their sight (and hopefully hearing) HE JUST HAS TO STOP HIMSELF FROM JUST CRYING-

Cuz the second hes out of sight he will LOSE ALL COMPOSURE and need a minute because he loves them so much AND THEYRE SO FCKING SMALL-

Its kinda funny tho cuz ur captain barnacles is a pretty tiny guy, wonder howd that work for u XD

Anyways gn or whatever time it is for u 🐻‍❄️✨✨✨

Also he and Bianca call at least every week for an hour and frequently send eachother updates about what they're up to

He could talk to her about anything and she's good at talking sense into him

He makes sure that natquick gets plenty of social interaction too, that man is like his father figure

(Kinda sad but I headcanon barnacles dad died when he was really young cuz of an accident where ice collapsed, probably did not help how he felt when he got stuck in an icy hole as a kid 💀🙏)

ALSO

Barnacles looking up at u vvv

Barnaclea being his lil theater kid self^

Wait~ they don't love you ✨like I love you ✨🥰

Barnacles half awake at a late night mission when everything is done and they're just driving the gup a back home

Barnacles and Bianca on a video call

[mikaze-discord]

HEAVENS: Love letters

Soooo this is the last of the love letter, I really must reiterate how thankful I am to the people who responded to my message. Specially thankful for the people who ended up writing for one of the boys, all of the love letter writers are so cool. If you wanted to write your own love letter for your oshi then feel free too!! Utapri Tumblr is kinda dead.... but! I hope you enjoyed the love letters

Please enjoy under cut!!!!!!!!!!!!

EIJI OTORI 

From Anon:

Eiji Otori is another member of HEAVENS and he is a down-to-earth type of character. One can say he is a cinnamon roll as he looks out for HEAVENS and his brother, Eiichi. Eiji talks in a formal manner to people outside of HEAVENS and addresses them by their surname like the time he worked with Tokiya for Mighty Aura, or when he was working with Camus and Masato for Feather in Hand. Around HEAVENS, Eiji talks casually, calling them by their first name. He is very mindful of other members of HEAVENS and Eiji keeps an open mind for ways to improve his skills as an idol and to help out his bandmates come to a solution where both sides agree. Eiji speaks very fondly of the people he works with formality and a lot of respect.

What I love about Eiji is his relationship with his brother, Eiichi Otori. The two have a strong bond as Eiichi looked after and took care of Eiji when growing up. The two of them are inseparable and do a lot together while looking after each other. Personally, their sibling bond is what I wish to have with my sibling as well, even though we're complete opposites like day and night! Their interactions are easily seen throughout the anime, you can even see their sibling bond show the most through HEAVENS Radio as Eiichi and Eiji are the co-hosts. If there is anything that I'd like to know more about Eiji, it would be about his hobby, gardening. He has a lot of knowledge on plants and perhaps agriculture. It'd be nice to see HEAVENS talk about their hobbies one day. But all in all, Eiji is a great character that I appreciate with a heart of gold!

From Anon:

Eiji Otori, the 4th member of HEAVENS is one of my two most favorite characters in Utapri. I was originally drawn to his kind and gentle demeanor, that made him such an easily lovable character. He was introduced in the 4th season of the anime in the cross idol unit episodes. The way he treated Tokiya besides knowing he was part of the rival idol group ended up becoming an essential part of Tokiya’s later character growth. Although Eiji is meant to be a foil for Tokiya’s character their personalities are completely polar opposites, their devotion to wanting to be an idol being one of the only similarities besides level headedness. Eiji is his own character, right down the way he speaks to the way he sings. Eiji seems to always carry the group in a loving and family-like way, even going as far as having domestic hobbies like gardening and baking. We always see him and even hear the way he interacts with the other members of HEAVENS on the radio show as if they were an inseparable family. Eiichi, his older brother and the leader of HEAVENS loves him in a way that is so complex but Eiji will always love him back with every fiber of his being to the deepest parts of his soul. There is a deep connection between the brothers that is so beautiful that even poetry couldn’t express, it’s more profound then words can show. It’s a bond they share that only they know, like a secret.

However, even then there is so much more about Eiji that makes him such a wonderful character. When it comes to myself, Eiji hits a bit close to home in a more personal way. Perhaps that is also a factor in why I love him so much. I empathize with him and I can see through his eyes in ways only a younger sibling would know. As a younger sister to a sibling who has always been in the spotlight in some form of way with a big presence, I always lived in her shadow, but I admired her and cared about her above anything else. The way Eiji feels about Eiichi is something that I can personally relate with and understand. Eiichi is an essential part of Eiji’s character and the anime does not lack to show this, nor does it lack to show that Eiji is just as much an essential part of Eiichi’s character. It’s more obvious in the radio show that is hosted by the two brother but it’s not fully ignored either in the anime. I love how Eiji interacts with all of the characters, and seems to find ways to treat everyone with kindness even if they aren’t kind to him in return. He admires those who show a deep love for the things he does, and respects those who are more experienced then he is. He’s always eager to learn

and please. He’s the kind of person you’d always want around and you’d want a hug when things get rough. Eiji is definitely the most pure hearted character of all the Utapri characters. And, I’ll always stand by that through and through.

VAN KIRYUIN

From @whereisvanderwood:

Kiryuin Van. Where to start? He’s cocky. He’s cocky as all hell. There’s something in his air that is poised yet undignified. Childish yet mature. The man is founded on juxtaposition, not dissimilar to a painting of Picasso. His ability to be unique in an industry that begs for individuality, to rise above a tidal wave of competition and stand apart from other fish in the sea, is awe-inspiring. Expectation is dead to him; though the oldest member of Heavens, the weight of bearing the role as ‘most mature’ or the ‘parent’ of the group couldn’t be further from his concern. He is only any dimension of himself he wants to be at any given time. Dumb bitch by morning, bad bitch by night. Much like his bandmates, his confidence and intimidating aura is unwavering. He claims his victory before a race begins, and I couldn’t say if that undying faith in oneself is a skill or a sin. Whatever it is, he owns it. He shamelessly, unapologetically owns who he is and shares it with his fans, friends and enemies.

Also, he’s hot. He’s very appealing to the human eye. His ruggedness reminds me of a warm blanket in winter. His voice, oh his voice. If the world was about to blow up and he just said “No it won’t”, in his own way, I think I’d believe him. Regardless of what he says being juvenile or mature, he’s always authentic. No sugar coats, no little white lies, only genuity. As just said before, he is who he is and wouldn’t change for anyone if it wasn’t in his own best interest. Who couldn’t love a guy like that?

YAMATO HYUGA

From @kusagiiiii:

I'll be honest, I used to forget Yamato exists alot LMAO I fell in love with him when I was looking at a HEAVENS group photo! I think he is a very stronk,very cute and a very soft boy! in some ways haha he's my type

I honestly wish there would be more story on the HEAVENS boys since they all seem like they had a pretty rough past so yee that's basically it~

From Sammy:

Everybody, listen up! It’s Sammy here! Are you ready for some strong appreciation? Let’s shout it out! Yeah!!

Where do I begin when it comes to Yamato? It took me a while to actually like him. At first, I wasn’t a fan of how he was when he first showed up in the anime. I still remember when Yamato was one of the few HEAVENS members people really didn’t like or care much for, next to Eiichi and Nagi.

I used to be one of those people too with Yamato. I found him to be very stubborn, but over time after listening to HEAVENS Radio; The Drama CDs; Watching Maji Love Kingdom, etc… I came to realize there’s so much more to him.

I’ve learned a lot more about him, especially through role-playing as him, and my love for Yamato skyrocketed. Even with all the new content that’s been coming out for HEAVENS lately like Black Garden and Endless Score, my love grows even more every day. Yamato sneaked his way up to being one of my best boys.

Yamato is HEAVENS’ Strongest member. (Seriously, how the heck does this boy train everyday and do so much of it?!) He’s not always aggressive and violent. He’s actually a really thoughtful person who cares about his friends a lot, even being very protective of them. Yamato is the kind of person that’ll immediately stop what he’s doing, and only think about how to help the other person feel better.

A lot of things tend to be overlooked for him cause of how he’s written in the anime, and there’s fans who only pay attention to that. Not even giving the extra content a thought or a single glance.

As Ryuya’s younger brother, Yamato has his own insecurities, especially since he’s always seen as just a shadow. He’s been trapped in darkness where he feels he’s not good enough to be appreciated and loved as his own person. He doesn’t know what to do and which path to take. Yamato only became an idol just to defeat and finally be better than Ryuya at something. I feel that goal is still there, but it’s not a major one like before. Now, Yamato has people like the other members of HEAVENS, the angels, and the other idols. He found his light and happiness.

Overall, Yamato is the kind of person he wants everyone to be proud of. He wants to always share his strongest power and energy, carrying the burden of everybody’s smiles. Wanting to see those around him happy and be the best they can be.

Another part that I really like about Yamato is whenever he gets embarrassed. I can’t help, but find that really cute cause it’s something we don’t see or hear out of him a lot.

There’s also the times he demonstrates how much he loves food. Even though he overeats and knows he can’t help it when he’s hungry, I really liked when Yamato stated that if eating makes you happy, go for it. Just make sure you train afterwards to burn off calories. It helps people feel good about themselves.

Even the times when Yamato struggles with difficult words, specifically English and kanji. It’s embarrassing for him to admit, but he knows he’s not good at that sort of thing. What I really like about this is HEAVENS is always willing to help him, even Tokiya and Cecil. They help keep things simple and easy for Yamato to understand.

There’s a lot you can say I just simply vibe with when it comes to Yamato, and I love him. Hope everyone enjoys this long appreciation of this strong boy, and I hope you all love him too!

SHION AMAKUSA 

From Anon:

When I saw Shion for the first time, he caught my attention with his beautiful appearance. His cream-white hair, his periwinkle eyes and his pale skin were a wonderful combination that I just couldn't ignore. Physically, he was exactly the type of character I love… Even his hairstyle is great! And what to say about his pretty face! To me, he looked like an angel.

His style in clothes is something I also like about him. With all this mixed, the only word I can use to describe him is "perfect".

But, of course, there's more than just physical appearance. Shion's way of speaking, as we all know, is quite… Particular. And those beautiful words made me be more interested in this boy, even if they were a bit difficult to understand. This characteristic is something that, in my opinion, makes him special, not only in his group but among all the groups.

That poetic way of speaking is a beautiful combination with his voice. When he speaks I find it so mystical… And when he sings his solo songs I feel relaxed and even a bit emotional. He's not an angel just physically, he also sings like one!

But what made me love him completely was his personality. To be honest, at first I didn't understand why he acted so hostile to Cecil and signed with him, but when it was explained later I could see his point of view and I felt sorry for him, for how he was feeling and the big sacrifice he was making if we take into account his thoughts.

Loyalty is something I value a lot, and Shion has a huge loyalty towards his friends. After that incident, he changes his way of thinking and he starts getting more friendly to the rest, something I find beautiful.

I also find him very cute, an extra point for me to like him. His -sometimes- childish attitude is adorable! And how he acts around his friends… So lovely!

I also feel a bit similar to him in some aspects, such as listening to the same song again and again, liking birds or even usually feeling sleepy, besides other things. These similarities make me feel connected in some way with him.

Shion is a very special character for me, and I can't wait to see more content about him, to know more about this wonderful boy, for example, about his family, where he is from, how he ended up in HEAVENS, how he started to speak the way he does… There are a lot of things we don't know yet and I hope we can get more information about Shion soon!

[mattmurdocksscars]

Miscommunication 2/?

Here we go! Still working on setting the world up, so nothing too crazy. We do get some more Reader/Poe interaction though AND we get to see a little of the relationship between Kylo and the Reader. After this, there will be one more chapter to get things set (where you’ll get to see how bad ass Reader is) and then we’ll be to all the good fun parts!

Pairing: First Order!Poe x Fem!Reader

Rating: Teen. Suggestive thoughts and language

Word Count: 1674

Tag List (OPEN): @himbopoes @writefightandflightclub @mellow-f1 @criminal-cookies​ @imaginecrushes​ 

I only tagged the people who specifically asked to be tagged, so if you would like to be tagged in the future, let me know!

The next time Captain Dameron sees you, it’s a few weeks later at a tactical meeting. He walked into the room and immediately noticed you standing beside Kylo Ren, in an all-black ensemble. You’re looking rough and he takes in the bruises that mar your face and the bags under your eyes. It’s clear you’ve come directly from whatever mission you were on because there is still dried blood around the cut at your hairline. If anything, though, this increases Poe’s intrigue. The Captain had found his thoughts drifting to you often, curious over just who you were and what your role in the First Order was. He was also a sucker for anyone who got the drop on him. Just remembering the look you had given him before leaving the interrogation room had his pants tightening in anticipation. He was determined to get to know you.

As if sensing his gaze, you turned from Kylo and caught his eyes. That slow smirk he’d seen you give Hux crawled onto your lips and you sent him a wink. He found his own lips twitching up into a smirk before he let his eyes roam over you, lingering on the visible wounds, before reconnecting his gaze with yours. You took it as the silent question it was and shrugged, before nodding your head slightly towards Kylo. He wasn’t sure if that meant it had been a mission from Kylo or if the man himself had inflicted the wounds but before he could really consider it, the meeting was starting, and his attention was pulled away.

The meeting seemed to drag on forever and by the end of it, you were ready to scream. You were sore, tired, and ready to get your wounds looked over so you could sleep for a week. As soon as the meeting was dismissed and Kylo nodded his dismissal, you slipped from the room and headed for the med bay. You hadn’t gotten far when you heard your name called in that sinful voice you’d been waiting to hear again. Turning, you found Captain Dameron striding towards you. You lazily let your gaze roam over him before settling on his face. You weren’t surprised to see him doing the same with you.

“Captain Dameron. Is there something I can help you with?”

“You can drop the formalities to start. You have kneed me in the face, you know.” You couldn’t help that laugh that slipped out of you at that and his dark eyes seemed to shine with mischief. “I was wondering if I could accompany you to the med bay.”

“I did apologize before I did it. I’m glad to see you took my advice and got that lip looked at.” You turned and continued on your journey, Poe falling into step beside with his hands clasped behind his back. “To what do I owe the pleasure of you escorting me?”

“I find myself…intrigued by you.” You could feel his eyes roving over your form, but you refused to fidget under the heat of his gaze. “I’ve never seen you before that mission and now I’m seeing you in tactical meetings, standing side by side with Kylo Ren. Every time I encounter you, you become more fascinating.”

“It’s because I work specifically for Kylo. He recruited me to be his intelligence officer and up until recently, it has been beneficial for me to remain anonymous. Unfortunately, that haywire mission proved that it would no longer be prudent. I was introduced to the council shortly after and sent on a mission a few days after. I just returned an hour before the meeting. Kylo insisted I attend as a show of my position. Luckily, my wounds weren’t severe, and bruises and blood are excellent intimidation factors.” You said the last part with a smirk and Poe felt one of his own rising to match yours again. You weren’t wrong in that observation as even he had noticed some of the council eyeing you warily during the meeting.

Poe found himself wondering if that was why he felt drawn to you. You radiated confidence and power. You were capable of reading a room and then manipulating it to your benefit. He’d only had the two encounters with you, but he could already tell that you were a fierce individual. It didn’t help that the looks you gave him made him want to fuck you senseless. The entire time he was thinking to himself, you watched him. You watched the way his eyes darkened considerably, and you found yourself pausing just outside the med bay doors to turn and face him. You stepped up to him and straightened his collar, smoothing you hands over the material. You didn’t need to look up to know his pupils had blown as he watched you, his rigid stance and increased heartrate giving him away.

“You know, Dameron. I find you to be quite intriguing as well. Your parents were rebels and yet you joined the First Order with no regrets. You have made a name for yourself as both an excellent pilot and a ruthless Captain. Yet, I’ve injured you and you’ve made no move to retaliate. In fact, you almost seemed concerned back at the meeting. Then, you proceed to follow me from said meeting and offer to escort me to the med bay. Tell me, is this the Dameron charm I’ve heard so much about?” You were purposefully baiting him, interested in seeing how he would react. He didn’t disappoint.

He easily backed you against the wall beside the med bay door and placed one hand beside your head, trapping you in place. His other caught the wrist of your hand that was still on his shoulder and brought it to his face. His eyes locked with your as he nipped at your pulse point on your wrist before soothing the mark with his tongue.

“You’ve not seen the Dameron charm just yet, sweetness. However…I think you’re the type that requires a bit more work than just charm.” He suddenly stepped away from you, dropping you hand. “Jury’s out if you’re worth all the effort just yet.” With a smirk and a wink, he turned and headed back down the hallway. You couldn’t deny the heat that had pooled in your belly at his actions and the way his voice had pitched lower. You watched him go, chewing on your bottom lip as you did so. You took every bit of him before he turned the corner. From his strong, wide shoulders, to his clasped hands, to his perfect ass, you admired the man who you had apparently caught the interest of. You knew, without a doubt in your mind, that Poe Dameron was a flickering flame and if you were not careful, you were liable to burn yourself. Thankfully, you’d always been good with high risk situations.

-------------------

It was an hour later, as you were finishing up in the med bay, that you were approached by Kylo. You had your back to the door, working on wrapping your ribs when you heard the door open.

“So, will you survive?” You couldn’t help the snort that slipped out at his question. You knew he was teasing you in his way and you smiled.

“Just some cracked ribs, bruises, and the cut on my head needed a few stitches. Should be good to go in a week or so.” You threw your shirt on and turned to face him. He was standing closer to you than you expected but what really threw you off was that he was reaching to remove his mask. You watched as he easily slipped the helmet off and set it down on the bed you had been occupying. Whatever he wanted to speak of wasn’t solely work related then. “Is something wrong?”

“What do you know of Captain Dameron?” You furrowed your brows at his question but shrugged.

“Not much. He was part of the group that ruined my mission before last and when I left the meeting, he asked to accompany me here.” Kylo just looked at you. He knew you had more information than that, so you sighed and elaborated, “Captain Poe Dameron. Leader of a TIE squad and is also occasionally sent with ground troops. Works underneath General Armitage Hux though there are rumors that they do not see eye to eye. His parents were members of the Rebellion, yet he chose to join the First Order. He has a wide range of skills including piloting, espionage, and interrogation.”

“I want you to be careful around him.” You were definitely not expecting that.

“Sir?”

“I know you. You’re interested in him and by the looks of it, you’ve also caught his interest. You know I could not care less if you get involved with someone, but make sure his intentions are his own and not…someone else’s. Understand?” Understanding dawned on you. Kylo and you may not have been best friends, the First Order didn’t exactly lend itself to those, but he was attempting to look out for you in his own way. It was no secret that General Hux hated Kylo and he would certainly not be above coming after you to prove a point. What better way than by having his own Captain get in close with you. You narrowed your eyes at the possibility.

“I’ll keep that in mind, sir.” Kylo nodded and slipped his helmet back on. He turned and headed for the door, you following close behind.

“I want you to take the week off to heal. When you come back, I’ve got a mission for you.”

“Yes, sir.” You watched as he turned and headed off down the hall before you headed the opposite direction. Normally, when you weren’t cleared for missions Kylo would still have you work in your office. This time, he was purposefully giving you time off and you knew exactly how to use it.

It was time to figure out just what Captain Dameron was about.

[creepingsharia]

Must Read: “They Thought They Were Free”

…But Then It Was Too Late.

If you read nothing else this weekend read this excerpt in its entirety. It could easily apply to The Americans, 2001 – 201?. (some bold font added)

Originally posted on Creeping Sharia - December 17, 2011

Excerpted from:

They Thought They Were Free

The Germans, 1933-45

Milton Mayer

But Then It Was Too Late

“What no one seemed to notice,” said a colleague of mine, a philologist, “was the ever widening gap, after 1933, between the government and the people. Just think how very wide this gap was to begin with, here in Germany. And it became always wider. You know, it doesn’t make people close to their government to be told that this is a people’s government, a true democracy, or to be enrolled in civilian defense, or even to vote. All this has little, really nothing, to do with knowing one is governing.

“What happened here was the gradual habituation of the people, little by little, to being governed by surprise; to receiving decisions deliberated in secret; to believing that the situation was so complicated that the government had to act on information which the people could not understand, or so dangerous that, even if the people could not understand it, it could not be released because of national security. And their sense of identification with Hitler, their trust in him, made it easier to widen this gap and reassured those who would otherwise have worried about it.

“This separation of government from people, this widening of the gap, took place so gradually and so insensibly, each step disguised (perhaps not even intentionally) as a temporary emergency measure or associated with true patriotic allegiance or with real social purposes. And all the crises and reforms (real reforms, too) so occupied the people that they did not see the slow motion underneath, of the whole process of government growing remoter and remoter.

“You will understand me when I say that my Middle High German was my life. It was all I cared about. I was a scholar, a specialist. Then, suddenly, I was plunged into all the new activity, as the university was drawn into the new situation; meetings, conferences, interviews, ceremonies, and, above all, papers to be filled out, reports, bibliographies, lists, questionnaires. And on top of that were the demands in the community, the things in which one had to, was ‘expected to’ participate that had not been there or had not been important before. It was all rigmarole, of course, but it consumed all one’s energies, coming on top of the work one really wanted to do. You can see how easy it was, then, not to think about fundamental things. One had no time.”

“Those,” I said, “are the words of my friend the baker. ‘One had no time to think. There was so much going on.’”

“Your friend the baker was right,” said my colleague. “The dictatorship, and the whole process of its coming into being, was above all diverting. It provided an excuse not to think for people who did not want to think anyway. I do not speak of your ‘little men,’ your baker and so on; I speak of my colleagues and myself, learned men, mind you. Most of us did not want to think about fundamental things and never had. There was no need to. Nazism gave us some dreadful, fundamental things to think about—we were decent people—and kept us so busy with continuous changes and ‘crises’ and so fascinated, yes, fascinated, by the machinations of the ‘national enemies,’ without and within, that we had no time to think about these dreadful things that were growing, little by little, all around us. Unconsciously, I suppose, we were grateful. Who wants to think?

“To live in this process is absolutely not to be able to notice it—please try to believe me—unless one has a much greater degree of political awareness, acuity, than most of us had ever had occasion to develop. Each step was so small, so inconsequential, so well explained or, on occasion, ‘regretted,’ that, unless one were detached from the whole process from the beginning, unless one understood what the whole thing was in principle, what all these ‘little measures’ that no ‘patriotic German’ could resent must some day lead to, one no more saw it developing from day to day than a farmer in his field sees the corn growing. One day it is over his head.

“How is this to be avoided, among ordinary men, even highly educated ordinary men? Frankly, I do not know. I do not see, even now. Many, many times since it all happened I have pondered that pair of great maxims, Principiis obsta and Finem respice—‘Resist the beginnings’ and ‘Consider the end.’ But one must foresee the end in order to resist, or even see, the beginnings. One must foresee the end clearly and certainly and how is this to be done, by ordinary men or even by extraordinary men? Things might have. And everyone counts on that might.

“Your ‘little men,’ your Nazi friends, were not against National Socialism in principle. Men like me, who were, are the greater offenders, not because we knew better (that would be too much to say) but because we sensed better. Pastor Niemöller spoke for the thousands and thousands of men like me when he spoke (too modestly of himself) and said that, when the Nazis attacked the Communists, he was a little uneasy, but, after all, he was not a Communist, and so he did nothing; and then they attacked the Socialists, and he was a little uneasier, but, still, he was not a Socialist, and he did nothing; and then the schools, the press, the Jews, and so on, and he was always uneasier, but still he did nothing. And then they attacked the Church, and he was a Churchman, and he did something—but then it was too late.”

“Yes,” I said.

“You see,” my colleague went on, “one doesn’t see exactly where or how to move. Believe me, this is true. Each act, each occasion, is worse than the last, but only a little worse. You wait for the next and the next. You wait for one great shocking occasion, thinking that others, when such a shock comes, will join with you in resisting somehow. You don’t want to act, or even talk, alone; you don’t want to ‘go out of your way to make trouble.’ Why not?—Well, you are not in the habit of doing it. And it is not just fear, fear of standing alone, that restrains you; it is also genuine uncertainty.

“Uncertainty is a very important factor, and, instead of decreasing as time goes on, it grows. Outside, in the streets, in the general community, ‘everyone’ is happy. One hears no protest, and certainly sees none. You know, in France or Italy there would be slogans against the government painted on walls and fences; in Germany, outside the great cities, perhaps, there is not even this. In the university community, in your own community, you speak privately to your colleagues, some of whom certainly feel as you do; but what do they say? They say, ‘It’s not so bad’ or ‘You’re seeing things’ or ‘You’re an alarmist.’

“And you are an alarmist. You are saying that this must lead to this, and you can’t prove it. These are the beginnings, yes; but how do you know for sure when you don’t know the end, and how do you know, or even surmise, the end? On the one hand, your enemies, the law, the regime, the Party, intimidate you. On the other, your colleagues pooh-pooh you as pessimistic or even neurotic. You are left with your close friends, who are, naturally, people who have always thought as you have.

“But your friends are fewer now. Some have drifted off somewhere or submerged themselves in their work. You no longer see as many as you did at meetings or gatherings. Informal groups become smaller; attendance drops off in little organizations, and the organizations themselves wither. Now, in small gatherings of your oldest friends, you feel that you are talking to yourselves, that you are isolated from the reality of things. This weakens your confidence still further and serves as a further deterrent to—to what? It is clearer all the time that, if you are going to do anything, you must make an occasion to do it, and then you are obviously a troublemaker. So you wait, and you wait.

“But the one great shocking occasion, when tens or hundreds or thousands will join with you, never comes. That’s the difficulty. If the last and worst act of the whole regime had come immediately after the first and smallest, thousands, yes, millions would have been sufficiently shocked—if, let us say, the gassing of the Jews in ’43 had come immediately after the ‘German Firm’ stickers on the windows of non-Jewish shops in ’33. But of course this isn’t the way it happens. In between come all the hundreds of little steps, some of them imperceptible, each of them preparing you not to be shocked by the next. Step C is not so much worse than Step B, and, if you did not make a stand at Step B, why should you at Step C? And so on to Step D.

“And one day, too late, your principles, if you were ever sensible of them, all rush in upon you. The burden of self-deception has grown too heavy, and some minor incident, in my case my little boy, hardly more than a baby, saying ‘Jewish swine,’ collapses it all at once, and you see that everything, everything, has changed and changed completely under your nose. The world you live in—your nation, your people—is not the world you were born in at all. The forms are all there, all untouched, all reassuring, the houses, the shops, the jobs, the mealtimes, the visits, the concerts, the cinema, the holidays. But the spirit, which you never noticed because you made the lifelong mistake of identifying it with the forms, is changed. Now you live in a world of hate and fear, and the people who hate and fear do not even know it themselves; when everyone is transformed, no one is transformed. Now you live in a system which rules without responsibility even to God. The system itself could not have intended this in the beginning, but in order to sustain itself it was compelled to go all the way.

“You have gone almost all the way yourself. Life is a continuing process, a flow, not a succession of acts and events at all. It has flowed to a new level, carrying you with it, without any effort on your part. On this new level you live, you have been living more comfortably every day, with new morals, new principles. You have accepted things you would not have accepted five years ago, a year ago, things that your father, even in Germany, could not have imagined.

“Suddenly it all comes down, all at once. You see what you are, what you have done, or, more accurately, what you haven’t done (for that was all that was required of most of us: that we do nothing). You remember those early meetings of your department in the university when, if one had stood, others would have stood, perhaps, but no one stood. A small matter, a matter of hiring this man or that, and you hired this one rather than that. You remember everything now, and your heart breaks. Too late. You are compromised beyond repair.

“What then? You must then shoot yourself. A few did. Or ‘adjust’ your principles. Many tried, and some, I suppose, succeeded; not I, however. Or learn to live the rest of your life with your shame. This last is the nearest there is, under the circumstances, to heroism: shame. Many Germans became this poor kind of hero, many more, I think, than the world knows or cares to know.”

I said nothing. I thought of nothing to say.

“I can tell you,” my colleague went on, “of a man in Leipzig, a judge. He was not a Nazi, except nominally, but he certainly wasn’t an anti-Nazi. He was just—a judge. In ’42 or ’43, early ’43, I think it was, a Jew was tried before him in a case involving, but only incidentally, relations with an ‘Aryan’ woman. This was ‘race injury,’ something the Party was especially anxious to punish. In the case at bar, however, the judge had the power to convict the man of a ‘nonracial’ offense and send him to an ordinary prison for a very long term, thus saving him from Party ‘processing’ which would have meant concentration camp or, more probably, deportation and death. But the man was innocent of the ‘nonracial’ charge, in the judge’s opinion, and so, as an honorable judge, he acquitted him. Of course, the Party seized the Jew as soon as he left the courtroom.”

“And the judge?”

“Yes, the judge. He could not get the case off his conscience—a case, mind you, in which he had acquitted an innocent man. He thought that he should have convicted him and saved him from the Party, but how could he have convicted an innocent man? The thing preyed on him more and more, and he had to talk about it, first to his family, then to his friends, and then to acquaintances. (That’s how I heard about it.) After the ’44 Putsch they arrested him. After that, I don’t know.”

I said nothing.

“Once the war began,” my colleague continued, “resistance, protest, criticism, complaint, all carried with them a multiplied likelihood of the greatest punishment. Mere lack of enthusiasm, or failure to show it in public, was ‘defeatism.’ You assumed that there were lists of those who would be ‘dealt with’ later, after the victory. Goebbels was very clever here, too. He continually promised a ‘victory orgy’ to ‘take care of’ those who thought that their ‘treasonable attitude’ had escaped notice. And he meant it; that was not just propaganda. And that was enough to put an end to all uncertainty.

“Once the war began, the government could do anything ‘necessary’ to win it; so it was with the ‘final solution of the Jewish problem,’ which the Nazis always talked about but never dared undertake, not even the Nazis, until war and its ‘necessities’ gave them the knowledge that they could get away with it. The people abroad who thought that war against Hitler would help the Jews were wrong. And the people in Germany who, once the war had begun, still thought of complaining, protesting, resisting, were betting on Germany’s losing the war. It was a long bet. Not many made it.”

Copyright notice: Excerpt from pages 166-73 of They Thought They Were Free: The Germans, 1933-45 by Milton Mayer, published by the University of Chicago Press. ©1955, 1966 by the University of Chicago. All rights reserved. This text may be used and shared in accordance with the fair-use provisions of U.S. copyright law, and it may be archived and redistributed in electronic form, provided that this entire notice, including copyright information, is carried and provided that the University of Chicago Press is notified and no fee is charged for access. Archiving, redistribution, or republication of this text on other terms, in any medium, requires the consent of the University of Chicago Press. (Footnotes and other references included in the book may have been removed from this online version of the text.)

http://www.press.uchicago.edu/Misc/Chicago/511928.html

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[raeynbowboi]

Into the Dragon’s Dungeon: How to Play as Itachi in DnD 5e

After covering one of my favorite villains and then my favorite superhero, it’s time to tackle my favorite anime “villain” by building the illusion master Itachi Uchiha from the Naruto franchise. Unlike the last two options, only one person has been responsible for creating and choosing the powers of this character, so I don’t have to look at multiple sources to pin down his powers, skills, and abilities.

The Makings of A Hero

Race probably seems like a no brainer. Itachi is a human. Super duper Simple. But for me personally, I tend to view most Shonen anime characters as Variant Humans. If a character can get kicked against a wall so hard they make a crater and then get up like it’s nothing, that’s not a normal human. So, I file them under Variant Humans in my builds.

When it comes to morality, it’s very easy to argue that Itachi is Lawful Evil. He’s committed horrible attrocities in the name of the law. But the slaughter of his family was for the greater good of the village, so you could also call that Chaotic Good. You could even argue that he’s sort of neutral. So the alignment you give him will depend largely on how you view him.

As a ninja, and a former secret police ninja to boot, Spy is a possible background for him. However, he’s also a rogue ninja, meaning he’s a wanted criminal, which could fit the Criminal background. Since Itachi is a member of the criminal organization Akatsuki, he could be considered a Faction Agent. And since he’s killed his entire clan, you could make him a Haunted One.

Fighting Style

The number one most important factor in a proper Itachi build is a high AC. Itachi’s best quality is that the guy is hard to pin down. I’d bet that if I went back through the entire series, I could count the number of times anyone actually managed to hit Itachi on one hand. Itachi tends to prefer to fight from mid to long range. When he was a child, he was much more focused on his physical combat. It wasn’t until Itachi was an adult that his focus shifted to magic and illusions. However, by the time he first appears in the series, his magic has become his primary means of fighting. Itachi is a very defensive fighter. Above anything else, Itachi is focused on avoiding damage and turning an opponent’s power against them.

The Sharingan

The magical eyes of the Uchiha Clan can copy techniques, mirror unknown jutsus in real time, and see through illusions. The Sharingan also improves reflexes and reaction time by giving the wielder an enhanced sense like Spider-man’s Spidey Senses. The evolved version, the Mangekyo Sharingan gives Itachi access to three important abilities. Amaterasu, a black flame so hot it can burn through the esophagus of a fire-breathing mountain toad. Susano’o, a giant skeletal spectral warrior that surrounds the user and protect them. And Itachi’s most signature ability, the Tsukuyomi, a powerful illusion that traps targets in a nightmare world that tortures them. While Amaterasu and Susano’o are a little harder to work into this particular build, Tsukuyomi is a lot easier to fit to the dnd format.

Physical Abilities

Itachi is one of the fastest characters in the series. In most video games, Itachi moves noticeably faster than the other characters. So a good build of Itachi should focus on mobility. However, just as important is the rapidness of his attacks. The more he can attack, the better.

Itachi is adept at fighting with shuriken (darts), kunai (daggers), and his short sword, all of which are finesse weapons.

Magical Abilities

All ninjas in the Naruto franchise are able to walk on water, walk up vertical surfaces, disguise themselves as other people, and create non-corporeal clones of themselves.

Every member of the Uchiha Clan has an affinity for Fire ninjutsu, and Itachi’s secondary affinity is Water ninjutsu.

Itachi takes the standard ninja clones one step further, creating his famous Crow Clone, an illusory clone of himself that disperses into a flock of crows upon being damaged. Itachi uses these crows to confuse, distract, and disorient his opponents.

Itachi is the strongest master of illusion magic in the series. Itachi has caused his foes to feel pain from shuriken he never threw, fight someone made to look like Itachi with illusions, turn another master illusionist’s genjutsu against her, and has made people waste time and energy fighting the air instead of him. 

Itachi’s Spellbook & Feats

Mobility     Haste (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Longstrider (Bard, Druid, Ranger, Wizard)     Mobile (Feat)

Basic Ninja Abilities     Alter Self (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Disguise Self (Bard, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Spider Climb (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Water Walk (Artificer, Cleric, Druid, Ranger, Sorcerer)

Fire     Aganazzar’s Scorcher (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Delayed Fireball Blast (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Dragon’s Breath (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Fireball (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Fire Bolt (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Flaming Sphere (Druid, Wizard)     Immolation (Sorcerer, Wizard)     Investiture of Flame (Druid, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Scorching Ray (Sorcerer, Wizard)

Water     Control Water (Cleric, Druid, Wizard)     Shape Water (Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Tidal Wave (Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Wall of Water (Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Watery Sphere (Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard)

Sharingan     Alert (Feat)     Arcane Eye (Wizard)     Defensive Duelist (Feat)     Detect Magic (Bard, Cleric, Druid, Paladin, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Dispel Magic (Bard, Cleric, Druid, Paladin, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Foresight (Bard, Druid, Warlock, Wizard)     Slow (Sorcerer, Wizard)     True Seeing (Bard, Cleric, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)

Illusions, Counters, Crows, & Redirection     Blur (Artificer, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Confusion (Bard, Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Counterspell (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Enemies Abound (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Flock of Familiars (Warlock, Wizard)     Hallucinatory Terrain (Bard, Druid, Warlock, Wizard)     Illusory Dragon (Wizard)     Major Image (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Minor Illusion (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Mirage Arcane (Bard, Druid, Wizard)     Mirror Image (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Mislead (Bard, Wizard)     Phantasmal Force (Bard, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Phantasmal Killer (Wizard)     Programmed Illusion (Bard, Wizard)     Project Image (Bard, Wizard)     Psychic Scream  (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Seeming (Bard, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Silent Image (Bard, Sorcerer, Wizard)     Simulacrum (Wizard)     Synaptic Static (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)

Tsukuyomi     Cause Fear (Warlock, Wizard)     Eyebite (Warlock, Wizard)     Fear  (Bard, Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Feeblemind (Bard, Druid, Warlock, Wizard)     Maddening Darkness (Warlock, Wizard)     Mental Prison (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Mind Spike (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Power Word: Pain (Sorcerer, Warlock, Wizard)     Weird (Wizard)

Get to Class

Itachi’s mix of martial and magical combat means he’s going to be multiclassing. While he could be an Arcane Trickster Rogue, there’s a wider selection of spells that a Wizard class would help him with. So, a good build for Itachi is a mix of Wizard, Rogue, and a little bit of Monk for the unarmored defense. As a rogue, the most useful subclass for him is the Scout, as it allows him to disengage whenever enemies get too close, letting him keep his distance in a fight. As a monk, the Way of Kensei will give Itachi the use of the Agile Parry and the Kensei’s shot, which will improve his aim with ranged weapon attacks. But the most important class for an Itachi build is a School of Illusions Wizard.

Stats and Proficiencies

First and foremost, Itachi needs to have a high AC because pinning this guy down is nigh impossible. So the higher you can make his AC, the better off he’ll be. So Dexterity is going to take top billing. As a Wizard, he’s going to cast spells with his Intelligence modifier, so that’s the next priority. Due to his monk levels and Itachi’s keen Sharingan eyes, Wisdom is going to be the next most important. Next, Deception is a vital part of convincing people to believe your illusions are real, so a good Charisma modifier is needed. Next up is Strength. because Anime characters are pretty strong. And we’ll have to dump Constitution, but as long as he can avoid being hit, that shouldn’t be too much of an issue.

Itachi is a prodigy, becoming an elite secret police officer by the age most of us are popping pimples and worrying about asking that special someone to the dance. As such, he’s going to have a lot of skills. Luckily, being a Rogue gives Itachi more skills to choose from and more expertise. His skills include: Acrobatics (Dex) Athletics (Str) Deception (Cha) Insight (Wis) Intimidation (Cha) Investigation (Int) Perception (Wis) Sleight of Hand (Dex) Stealth (Dex)

This build was particularly frustrating. Not because I didn’t know how to build him, but because it got accidentally deleted when I was halfway through it. Still, I hope I’ve built Itachi the right way to encompass his abilities and fighting style. I did my own level 20 build which you can check out right [here]. Do you agree with how I built Itachi? Do you have a better suggestion for how to build him? And I’m taking requests. Do you have a character you’d like to see me build? Let me know and I’ll see you next time in the Dragon’s Dungeon.

[bigskydreaming]

I really encourage people who have legitimate gripes with something I say or express on here to like.....either just DM, @ me directly or if you’re going to pop into my inbox to debate something with me, like, do so off anon, even if you ask that I don’t publish your ask and just respond to you in private. I always abide by that if people ask me to do that, and I’m 10000x more likely to treat your complaint or disagreement with dignity even if I completely disagree with it, than like....if you go on anon with it. 

Because dunno if you’ve noticed, lol, but there’s kinda a tendency with people who pick fights with me on anon or who @ me in general with some form of “LOL I can’t believe you’re so dumb as to believe this thing [that you don’t actually believe or else is not at all actually what I’m framing it as being],” to like.....only really do so in an attempt to trip me up, expose me as a hypocrite or pull some kind of ‘Gotcha!’ So, realistically, it just is not possible for me to give most anons who disagree with me the benefit of the doubt or for me to assume they’re at least coming from a place of actual honest disagreement rather than just....playing games, which I fucking despise and I refuse to respond to with respect. 

I sound ridiculous in nine out of ten of my over the top responses to people giving me shit, because of...deliberate intent on my part. *Shrugs* Because I personally consider it to be extremely ridiculous, how often I have people trying to poke holes in things I say, by.....poking at stuff I never even say, lol. 

I don’t actually always believe I’m right about everything, but I fully understand how my tone can convey that I do think that in a lot of these back-and-forths, because.....the one thing I do pretty much always think I’m right about is what it is I’m actually saying or believe. And thus, I really do not care for people trying to tell me I said otherwise, when I have a looooot of proof to point to how even when I’m being like, King Ridiculous in how I say or phrase something....nobody ever seems to have trouble comprehending my points on pretty much any topic across the board......until it happens to be a point I make on a matter they take issue with.

So just a general PSA, do with it what you will, but like. I’m just saying: 

I know I’m contentious, and I don’t actually want people to just automatically 100% take everything I say as fact or just never disagree with me, since that’s like....the polar opposite of pretty much my entire belief system or view of life and how to go through it lol. 

Buuuuut it honestly is exhausting constantly being hit up by people in bad faith, and who prove over and over again that they are perfectly comfortable saying or doing anything with no loyalty to even their own arguments, as long as it nets them a ‘win’ in arguing with me for the sake of arguing or whatever the fuck their motivation might be, I honestly do not care, lol. And I’m just......long past assuming that someone who is approaching me on anon to argue or contest something I’ve said or a position I’ve taken, is doing so in good faith instead of just as part of a twelve step plan wherein they disingenuously go about trying to lay some kind of convoluted ‘trap’ to lure me into. As though any of this is worth that fucking effort in the first place. LOL.

So by all means, disagree with me, contest me, put the screws to something I say and force me to defend my point further.....but like.....just be fucking honest about it. Or be willing to put your URL/name to it when doing so, even if you ask that I keep it out of public view, so that at least I know you’re not one of my half a dozen hate-following Regulars who habitually pop up on anon pretending to be someone brand new until three messages later when they’re like “Surprise! You thought I was just some rando, but here I am with the same receipts I’ve been claiming to have for the past half a decade!” (Oh no, much shock, mortification, oh unknowable plot twist, who could have ever seen that coming). LOL, y’know what I mean? Like, if you’re off anon or if you at least @ me with something approaching at least SOME modicum of respect, I’m soooooo much more likely to not just dismiss anything and everything you say from the word go, just because the sheer novelty of that approach is gonna be more engaging to me than, like, Me Vs Some Rando Whose Opening Gambit Is “Well Actually.....*proceeds to argue against points several galactic light years north of anything I’ve ever actually said ever*”: Round Fifty Two Bajillion. 

Like yeah, I’m rude as fuck in a lot of the arguments I get into on here, because I’m not a big fan of turning the other cheek and also I’m not gonna gloss over the ugly in something someone says just because they couch it in ‘civilized, well-mannered discourse.’ So I’m not at all offering some carte blanche guarantee or a secret password for how to go about saying something vile to my face without me responding by verbally ripping your head off, lol, I just mean like.....you ever have some free time to kill, go back through my archives to my earliest posts on this site. You can literally WATCH the slow expiration of my Give-A-Fucks in real time. I usually position myself to be the Reactive part of an argument on this site deliberately.....I don’t go starting things unless I’m weighing in on something that crosses my dash and already is looking ugly as hell, and for the most part, 90% of the fights I get into on this site are people approaching me to begin it, and y’know.....I don’t owe it to anyone to treat them or their position with more respect than they approach me with. LOL. And also, I don’t owe it to my own reading comprehension or that of anyone else who is similarly not an idiot to treat the ‘faux-respect/politeness’ people are addicted to on here as anything other than rudeness couched in the additional insult of assuming I and others are too stupid to see the subtextual disdain. Like. Nope. Miss me.

Bottom line is just, I’m not looking to be yet one more person giving people who are legitimately questioning things they’ve been told or led to believe, like, reason to be too intimidated or afraid to actually question these things rather than just keep to their personal status quo in an effort to avoid confrontation. But I’m always going to be trying to balance that with being equally not a fan of enabling people who play-act at being too fragile or delicate to face up to their own behavior or the ugliness of their own opinions or stances if its delivered to them in ways that inspire them to cry-type about how like, its not their fault society told them it was okay to shit on entire groups of people as long as they could safely get away with it.

There’s a line there and I’m no tight-rope walker so no, I don’t have all the answers and am not actually trying to pretend I do, and believe it or not, I put a lot of thought and introspection into constantly self-evaluating not just my own stances and beliefs, but the why’s of them, and the how’s of how I go about interacting with others because of them, or talking about them, or anything of the like.

But because I do put a lot of effort into that myself, I am aware of like....there not really being an excuse for others not being similarly willing to do the same with their own behavior, beliefs or approaches to others, so.....meet me halfway, is all this really comes down to. To anyone who genuinely does find themselves at odds with things I say or troubled by viewpoints I espouse or even just flat out confused as to how to reconcile something I brought up with contradictory beliefs they’ve long held or been instilled with and are just trying to figure out which actually sounds more right to them now.

I do not want to be the bogeyman who is just so intimidating that even when he says something that makes you go ‘huh, maybe this thing I thought was wrong, but I’m not sure,’ you’re afraid to follow-up and explore that further in a back-and-forth with me. But I’m similarly disinclined to be used as the strawman/patsy/etc of people who are just interested in trying to manuever me into some conversational position they feel they can use to discredit me in front of their own followers and thus cement their own bullshit position that way. 

I just happen to get a lot of the latter, and that kinda plays directly into why I so often end up defaulting to the former. That’s not actually an excuse and so its more than fair for anyone to think that’s no reason to change their mind about me, a thing I’ve said or a way I’ve said it. But if fair is actually a thing you’re interested in, then please consider factoring all of the above in when deciding how or why or in what ways you approach an argument or disagreement with me, if you find yourself inclined to do so in the future. 

I would appreciate it, and even more importantly, I promise you it will be far more productive in encouraging me to actually argue or debate a point with you. As opposed to just making light of anything you say to me, much like I feel most approaches to me make light of the things I say, and thus.....my tendency to default to variations of LOL, you got some dumb on your face there buddy.

ANYWAYS.

Thank you for your consideration in this matter,

The Extremely Tired and Over It Management

[kieraelieson]

Human/Fairy Relations 2

The second part of my Sanders Sides Fanfic based on a prompt from @arc852

Link to Part One

Promt:  - Thomas heads out into the woods one day, planning to just go on a bit of a nature walk. People have told him to stop and turn back when he comes across the line of flowers, but he doesn’t listen. He crosses them, only to suddenly succumb to a purple mist. When he wakes up, a tiny man with wings is flying above him, giving off a purple aura. And Thomas realizes he can’t move.

Thomas had been with the fairies for three days. 

Officially, he was Anxiety’s responsibility. Which meant that if he was ever seen away from him all the other fairies would herd him back. It wasn’t… an unpleasant way to live, but he did miss home. 

Flying, though, flying was awesome!

He had been allowed, and given a written permission in case he was stopped, to go to Logan and Patton’s house. Logan had said Patton’s name, and soon after Patton had let Logan’s name slip. Anxiety’s, though, was still safely a secret. 

But now he was flying. Logan and Patton lived up high, which Thomas did not mind at all. Their house was built on top of a sunflower, which made it one of the larger houses in the village. This village was one of many, but the fairies that lived here also had other homes, in the human world, accessed by secret passages. Because of this, the village, which was smallish anyway, was always at least half empty. The prince of the village stayed, and so did Logan, but for different reasons. The Prince had to stay, to keep order and to be available to help the fairies. But Logan had to stay to keep Patton here. And, Thomas guessed, Anxiety would now have to stay. To make sure Thomas never got out. 

But that was a depressing thought, and he was not going to go be depressed when he saw Patton. Thomas forced a smile on his face as he flew higher. 

He came up onto the flower. Even though he was tiny, especially in comparison to the massive flower, Patton was currently tinier. Thomas knee that Logan was the one that did this, but he still had no idea of why. Patton didn’t particularly enjoy it. If Anxiety was able, would he shrink Thomas further as well? 

But Patton broke him out of his depressing thoughts again, calling out his name and flying straight at him. He was always affectionate, even while tiny, and gave Thomas the best hug he could manage. 

“It’s good to see you, Pat!”

“I’m glad to see you too, Kiddo! What brings you all the way up here?”

Thomas appreciated that Patton called him kiddo. It was better than Sanders. Or human. 

“I just came to visit. Is Logan home?”

Patton cocked his head to the side, as if he couldn’t believe that Thomas would want to see Logan. Which, to be fair, he kind of didn’t. Logan wasn’t unkind, but he knew a lot of things, and acted on that knowledge. The problem was that, without the same knowledge, it seemed to Thomas that Logan did lots of things for no reason. Like shrinking Patton. He couldn’t seem to let go of a grudge for that one. 

“Yeah, he’s here.”

Thomas went inside, Patton hovering around his head. 

“Logan.” Thomas said firmly, noting the slight flinch.

A second later, smoothly, as if he was just now noticing Thomas, Logan looked over the top of his book. 

“Sanders.”

“I’ve come for a visit, and I want you to put Patton back to my size.”

Patton flitted back into Thomas’s field of vision, looking rather worried. Thomas knew that if he had told Patton of his intentions he would not have wanted him to do it. 

Logan raised an eyebrow. “Surely, if you’re asking for a favor, you have something to offer in return.”

Nope. Thomas had not thought this through far enough. He had noticed that Logan flinched whenever he used his name, and had hoped that whatever it was would also make Logan more receptive to requests. He had also hoped on a bit of an intimidation factor, which it seemed he did not have enough of. 

Logan continued when Thomas hesitated so long. “You could give me your name.”

Patton was minutely shaking his head. 

Suddenly Logan blinked. His demeanor changed, becoming as warm as he could be, which still wasn’t very warm, especially when standing next to Patton. “You said you wanted Patton to be the same size as you, correct?”

“Um… yes?”

“Then I’ll offer you a more attractive deal. I’ll do it if you give Patton your name.”

Thomas’s eyes flicked to Patton, who was now shaking his head vigorously. 

“...no… wait, why not?”

“Patton.” Logan said. He always did this, just say Patton, and then he was somehow always affected by whatever. 

Patton spun around to face Logan, and Thomas couldn’t see his face anymore. 

“I’ll give you a final deal,” Logan offered. “Give Patton your name, and I’ll make him your size, or don’t, and I’ll make you his size.”

Patton spun back to face Thomas, but too late to stop him from saying, “Deal. And no.”

Logan stood up, and started talking in the fairy language, where the only word Thomas could catch was Sanders. Then he was shrinking. It was quick, barely thirty seconds, and he was the same size as Patton. 

Patton grabbed him by the arm and zipped out an open window. 

“You shouldn’t do that!” Patton scolded. 

“I just… wanted to help you.”

Patton hugged him tightly. “I know. And it’s really sweet of you, kiddo, but Logan is really, really smart. You can’t make deals with him.”

“Why not? And why can’t I tell you my name?”

“I can’t—I can’t tell you.”

“Why not? I want to know what’s going on! I’ve been kidnapped by fairies and I don’t even know why!”

Thomas lowered his voice when he saw the look on Patton’s face. “I’m sorry. But I do want to know what’s going on.”

“Well, I don’t know everything either, but the reason that they captured us is kind of like revenge. Because humans capture fairies. And now fairies want at least some humans to feel the way they feel, I guess.”

“But then why the name thing? Why is it such a big deal?”

“Because a fairy can control a human with their name. There’s more to it than that, but the more they know about you the more they can control you. And I think somehow that humans must be able to do the same to fairies, but I don’t know how.”

“So that’s why Logan flinches when I call him by his name.”

Patton nodded. “I really… I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Can we go do something fun?”

“Sure, Pat. Just, one more thing?”

Patton waited. 

“Are you, really, alright? I know Logan bosses you around a lot, and, I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Patton hugged Thomas again. “I’m fine, Kiddo. Thank you.”

••^*^••

“I’ve bought you some time, but it won’t be long before they start to get… more concerned. You need to get his name.”

“I know,” Virgil raked his hand through his hair. “I know, but he won’t tell me anything. How’d you get Patton to do it?”

“I pretended to be a human. But at this point in time, knowing you as well as he does, he won’t believe a simple glamour.”

“What if he tells Patton? We can get the name from Patton, and that’s better than what we have.”

“If we do that, it would only be because the village began to get violent. It would likely hurt Patton to be used in that way, and Sanders would assuredly guard his name closer than ever after the fact. We’d never be given his name.”

Virgil growled and paced. “I never thought that this would be so hard. You made it look so easy!”

“Rest assured, it was not simple for me either. It still isn’t.”

“What about someone else? Do you think anyone else could get him to give them his name?”

“Not in a nonviolent manner, no. He’s been here nearly a week, and the only attachments he’s made have been to yourself and to Patton. Not to mention, he’s considerably more… I suppose discontent might be a suitable word, toward his own position. Patton settled into his place relatively easily, whereas Sanders keeps trying, thankfully unsuccessfully, to invoke names.”

Virgil frowned. His hands fisted in his hair as he tried to think of anything else he could try. 

“He’s been heard trying to invoke my name,” Logan said quietly. 

“What?” Virgil paled. “By who?”

“I’m not certain. But I’m sure that by tomorrow morning we’ll have some angry people on out hands, and I don’t think that keeping him small will appease them this time.”

“What should we do?”

••^*^••

When Thomas woke up, Anxiety had already left the room. He sat up and stretched, his wings fluttering. By now, moving them was almost unconscious. He was still tiny. 

He flew to the door. Anxiety usually left it a bit open if he woke up first, since Thomas couldn’t open it by himself. But not today. 

Thomas pounded on the door, but it made even less noise than usual. That was odd. He tried to look through the crack in the doorframe, but it was stuffed with pieces of flower petals. That was even more odd. Anxiety must really want him to be stuck in the bedroom for some reason. 

“Anxiety!” Thomas yelled. 

From behind him there was a groan. He spun around. Patton was sitting up slowly. He was tiny, and so was Thomas, but Thomas was still surprised that he hadn’t noticed. But that wasn’t the biggest thing he hadn’t noticed. Patton’s wings were gone. 

Patton gave a confused, tired frown. He must have tried to fly up. He reached his hands back, but before he could feel the truth Thomas was charging into him, hugging him tightly. 

“Oof! Kiddo. What’s going on?”

Thomas shook his head. He didn’t know. 

From outside, as the sun rose, so did the sound of voices. Angry voices. Thomas could hear Anxiety’s voice raising among them, but there were so many all at once he couldn’t tell what they were saying. 

“I—my wings…” Patton said softly. “He’s never taken my wings.”

Thomas squeezed tighter. He didn’t know what else to do. Then he saw a paper on the bed. He let go of Patton to flip it over. 

I want your name, and I’m tired of waiting. 

Thomas gritted his teeth. 

“It’s not fair!” He exploded. “How can they just—just hurt you like this?!”

Patton was staring blankly at the paper, and a tear ran down his face. “I don’t know…”

Thomas flew to the door and started banging on it, even though there was no way he was being heard. 

“Logan changed so much this last week,” Patton cried, and Thomas turned to see him with his face in his hands. “I don’t understand!”

Thomas flew back to Patton. “It’ll be alright. I’ll find some way to fix things.”

Patton looked up, something dangerous glinting in his eyes behind the pain. “Logic’s real name is Logan, and Anxiety’s real name is Virgil. I’m giving you their names.”

Thomas hugged Patton tightly again. “My name is Thomas.”

Patton hugged him back just as tightly. “And my name is Patton. I trust you, Thomas, let’s get out of here.”

Thomas let go of Patton. “I have an idea.”

He flew back a little bit away from Patton. Then he yelled, as loudly as he could and with as much belief as he could muster. “Virgil! Logan! Put me back to my right size!”

And then he was growing. He managed to pick up Patton and shield him in his hands before he burst out of the house. He started walking for the pool in the middle of the village, calling Virgil and Logan as he went, and ignoring the clamor of the other fairies. He went through the pool more easily this time, and was only slightly dizzy when emerging from the other side. 

He slid Patton onto his head, assuming that he’d be able to hold onto his hair and not fall off, since he didn’t have a pocket. 

He waited barely a minute before Virgil and Logan came out, and he immediately grabbed at them. He caught Virgil, but Logan ducked out of reach. 

“What are you doing?” Logan yelled, still flitting around so that he wasn’t an easy catch. 

“I’m going back home. And I’m taking Patton with me. I want you to turn him back to his normal size as well.”

Thomas brought Virgil up to his eye level. “Take my wings back, I won’t need them anymore.”

Virgil squirmed in his hand. “I don’t… I don’t know that I can without your name.”

Thomas frowned. This again? Virgil cried out, and he quickly loosened his grip. 

“Let him go,” Logan said, his voice not commanding like usual, but almost pleading. “I’ll take your wings off and I’ll return Patton to his usual size.”

“To his human size,” Thomas clarified, suddenly realizing that with knowing their names, and holding Virgil in his hand, he actually had bargaining chips now. 

“Yes.” Logan said. 

From on top of his head, the minuscule weight slowly grew as Logan started speaking in the fairy tongue. As he grew large enough, Patton climbed down to stand next to Thomas. Patton was looking down at the ground, avoiding looking at Logan or Virgil. 

“Can I touch you?” Logan asked. 

“Only if it’s to take the wings off,” Thomas answered. 

Logan flew behind him and touched the tips of his wings. Thomas could feel them returning to his back in much the same way as they had come. 

Virgil squirmed again. Thomas tightened his grip just slightly, unwilling to lose his bargaining chip. But then he saw the flash of pain that went across Virgil’s face, and all the rest of his anger turned to guilt. 

“I want you both to promise that you won’t stop us or do anything to us while we’re going home,” Thomas said. 

“Yes. I promise.” Logan said, his eyes trained on Virgil. 

“Promise,” Virgil said, and the pain in his voice was greater than it had been on his face. 

Thomas opened his hand, feeling the guilt shift from welling up in his gut to stabbing him when he saw the crumpled state of Virgil’s wings. 

Logan flew down and picked Virgil up, flying to a safe distance away. 

Thomas turned to place the pool at his back. Once they were out of the ring of flowers he could figure where he was and find his way home. Patton turned back once. 

“Bye,” he said, his voice small. 

••^*^••

It took a day to get back to Thomas’s house, but they did get back, and Patton, who said that he didn’t have anyone to go back to, became Thomas’s roommate. 

[inexchangeforyoursoul]

FINALLY birthed this thing. I’m officially a disaster with writing anything that involves conflict. Just like irl. :”) Anyway, yeah, there were 3 reasons why I did not finish this immediately about a month ago.

Első: See above.

Második: I had no idea what I wanted the last drop for Hawks to be before writing the rest in advance anyway, whoopsie~

Harmadik: I was.... reeeeeally not sure whether I want to publish this during pride month, seeing as I’m cis, and what kind of shit I put in this. (..... ok I’ve been thinking about this, and somebody just tell me if I’m plain projecting shit here. I might as well. Like, I always am, but it has usually got to do with characters being heavily #relatable in some way in strictly canon, which goes for everyone I write scenarios for. But now I’m thinking about whether there is something more to this, bc me headcanoning Shiggy as genderfluid and starting that shitty LawxOC body swap fic came around the same time two years ago, and now here’s Hawks, too. I’m onto you, me. I’m so onto me...)

Anyway... if you want the usual fluff, you might wanna sit this one out. (There’s some of it, but beware of everything else... it got p long (~6.5k), too, so you might wanna read it on a proper platform for txt: AO3 )

Big, BIG thanks @cutiesableye @acidmatze @waxwingedhawks and @mistystarshine for basically proofreading it and slapping a big green GO into my nervous face. Or being at it rn; regardless, I am thankful. Sssh, only dreams now.

I hope y’all be as uncomfortable reading the meat of this as I was writing it, whoops.

For how much he's surrounded by people normally -which he enjoys most of the time, really- Hawks prefers the silent rooftop right now. It shouldn't be anything out of the ordinary, he'd need a lot more alone time in the first place… but he's supposed to be working right now. Be in the thick of this spying shit, collecting intel from social and environmental clues like nobody's business.

Returning to the room is not something he wants right now, though. The topic and the awkward atmosphere it brought are weighing on him, and he'd rather get over this before moving on with the sleuthing business. He's been perching over the weed-ridden parking lot for like half an hour already, though. Judging by what he can pick up, the League is back to their time killing activities, and not very concerned about his absence. He noticed Spinner checking on him some time back from the doorway, and that's what it was. He's low-key grateful that they would let him breathe instead of poking around some more, or tailing him. If it's something he's allowed to do all the time, it'll be a luxury he's plain going to cherish for as long as it lasts.

Another plus is… that his reasons to join have become more than just believable. Even if this bit of information was not something he wanted to share. Like, at all. Ever. It was perhaps naive to think nobody will ever find out in the first place, that it would stay a secret of the select few who trained and took care of him. But the ones aware of it now being the members of Japan's most infamous terrorist organization… is not reassuring. 

Still… they are letting him be alone. It's… nice. Being seen as a person. It also hurts, though.

His feathers catch onto the vibrations of someone coming up the staircase again. The echoes tell of familiar size, weight and shapes… he knows who it will be. Being a wild card, he's probably coming on his own volition. The plastic smile is already in place, even though it has never worked on the guy- this was nice while it lasted.

The metal door opens with a lazy creak, then there's a soft thud, followed by slacking steps that stop right behind him. Dabi takes a swig from the beer can in his hand before speaking. "So… Peacock and Starling, huh."

"What about them, bacon face?" It's a funny feeling to hear someone say those… names, technically. It's equally funny to think that one of those is what he'd be known as if things go a little more his way. Even considered the title Phoenix for a moment, but that was too pretentious even for him, not to mention ill-fitting past being made of reds and yellows. As for the flashy Peacock… it's easy to see why the blatant joke got rejected off the bat. He'd look sick in iridescent blues and greens for sure, but that's all the reason he ever had to consider it. Those colors didn’t fit his basically pre-established brand… and nowadays he'd rather be invisible than catch even more eyes, anyway. And there's the almost, almost final Red Starling, which had the prototype of his current hero costume and everything…

He wanted to avoid predatory birds when given the task to choose a hero name, blatant secondary traits notwithstanding. They were beautiful creatures, yes… but hardly something reassuring and safe, killing for a living, full of pointy bits. Someone else probably wouldn't have batted an eye and had gone for the intimidation factor, but it was simply not what he had in mind.

A hawk… is a borderline case. It's among the smaller species and underwent some form of domestication, after all. They are not ideal for being kept as mere pets, though; they serve a purpose, instead.

They are used.

Used to hunt for sport or pest control, as he usually does. As he's supposed to right now.

So 'Hawks' was an afterthought, invoking the image of speed and danger. Which they insisted on, especially after… that. Smuggling the S at the end on the form was a last passive-aggressive jab after getting the okay, before letting go of who he used to, or wanted to be. It was fascinating to see the big shots make peace with it almost immediately, and regarding it as an improvement, even; 'makes it easier to associate with a swarm of feathers,' and 'more unique and identifiable,' they said. As if the original idea didn't accomplish both. It really was just… fascinating. The rest of these names, he banished to the stuffiest, darkest corners of his mind, as there were few good things, and even less pleasant memories attached to them. Until… today.

What has happened was simple and logical- the idea whether he'd choose another alias for underground activities came up. Mentioning them in the first place was an enormous mistake… and entertaining either as a viable option was even more so. Disturbing those relics reminded him of those buried memories and feelings, and all he can think of right now is the way Himiko's words rang in his ears barely half an hour ago.

Today, your smell reminds me of Big Sister.

Dabi lets out a sigh before getting to the meat of it. He spent the time Hawks had been gone on thinking himself, and there's a lot to unpack here. So he ought to take it step by step, lest he gets lost in the details. “Let me… get this story of yours straight."

… Great. This is exactly what he needs.

"It starts with… dirty, piss-poor little you getting caught up in a car accident and single handedly resolving it, right? Then, for doing something nice and selfless like that… you got sold off like a slab of fucking meat to the government.”

He blinks. "Hmm… not the most revolutionary take on it. I know you can do better." Claiming that the thought has never crossed his mind would be a lie. He just never let himself dwell on it. But now, this idiot is making him do exactly that. Or is trying to, at the very least. It certainly seems to be one of those convos. This… is turning out to be a major pain in the ass right away. Maybe he should reconsider provoking him this time around, it could backfire big time in the current mood of his.

“It is what happened, though, wasn’t it?” Dabi continues, slipping down to sit next to him, one leg dangling over the edge. “And once your apparently sub-par parents raked in the easy money, and washed their hands of you… you got stripped of everything.”

"Bold of you to assume that I had much to lose, bro. If you know about the accident, you also know where they picked me up from." Putting up a front aside, there was a rough edge to that 'everything' that makes Hawks want to run for the hills immediately. Nope, he is positively not in the mood for antagonistic banter at the moment. He wasn't really able to hide his upset and embarrassment over the situation, so Dabi must have found some twisted sense of enjoyment in pestering him about this specifically. Why can't this asshole just… shut up for once. He thought the villain incapable of it, but he does it so damn well with others around. Sticking with the lot might be a good idea, because solo Dabi is worse. He… he better filter out all the babbling before he starts thinking about bad shit or worse. It’s been a while since he had to take such measures, but he'll have to lull himself into a coma, and just… shut up. Inside out. And hope that Dabi gets bored of him.

“Doesn't change the point, does it, now. They started with any meaningful human contact you may have had… until they erased every last ounce of self," Comes the continuation while Hawks tries to block it out; "They denied you time, likes, attention, possibly even your basic fucking needs while moulding you into a perfect little cleanup machine that fears no death. Then tossed your dried-up skeleton into a roomy cage, filled with expensive junk to fill the void, as a semblance of compensation. Well thanks for fucking nothing, you sick fucks."

Hawks' eyes have locked onto a sunbathing lizard in the distance, but the idle animal is not quite enough of a distraction and his fingers twitch with the tightening grip over the wall's edge. Why does it sound as if Dabi was taking his side?

Shut up… don't pay attention.

He winces when Dabi pulls on the collar of his tracksuit to take a disgusted look at the label. "All the shit you wear was gifted from companies you played dress-up doll for, wasn't it… one fantastic billboard, you are. You own literally nothing else, do you? I'm sure that's the case, because, funny story… a newbie classmate of mine, some dump kid whose parents became new money, had always obscene amounts of cash on him…  but after an initial shopping spree, he never could bring himself to buy a fucking thing. So we asked him about it. Turns out he simply felt like utter shit for spending any of it unless he had a good reason. I laughed then, but apparently, getting a bag of chips is a gargantuan issue for most people who grew up in poverty." 

He leans closer, low words dripping like liquid venom in Hawks' ear. "You, too, feel like garbage every time you spend an ounce of money on something you can do without, don't you? Reminding yourself that there are dozens of that thing at home, lying untouched in your wardrobe that's the size of some families' entire house. Pray-tell Hawks, how many times did you sit over a full basket of online goods… the stuff of your dreams, probably some basic ass shit... only to back out at the last second, hmm?"

Shut up.

Dabi's eyes slide to the tense hands possibly attempting to tear the crumbling edge off the worn wall. A second later, he distances himself again, stirring the can with lazy, circular motions. "I don't even want to imagine what it feels like. Never spent a fucking dime on anything but charities, I fancy. And the odd bottle of booze, fuck or junk food… Are those chicken bits the only thing you're allowed to get? Tch.” 

“What a fucking luxury, being allowed to treat yourself to a bucket every other week, when your disgusting training diet has been set in stone three months in advance." It sounds like a personal addendum, but not a single word in that sentence escapes the overbearing sarcasm and condescension.

A still ticking cogwheel in the hero's head wonders why Dabi knows of the standard diet thing he has to undergo at least twice a year being three months long, and how he could possibly know that he's come to hate half of the dishes over the years. The overwhelming majority of said cogs have long come to a halt, however, screeching SHUT UP. He's not sure who or what that message is directed to anymore. Probably both of them.

Dabi’s waltzing wrist comes to a halt, soon followed by the whirling liquid in the can; it's a minute break, the kind that's just enough to make conversations awkward. In fact, the silence is too big for Hawks to handle- there’s no white noise to drown out and it makes not thinking, not paying attention unbearably hard. The lizard disappears under the cracked asphalt, leaving him with nothing.

“With how long it took you to respond to Shigaraki, they also stripped you of your name. And what I got from the exchange with Toga… is that the same goes for your body, too.”

A shiver runs down Hawks’ back and wings over the addition, kicking the machine brain back in full order despite his best efforts. Dabi takes a big swig of beer and lets out a sigh, resulting in another ill-placed pause. It gives Hawks time to think, goddammit, and he thinks too fast, too hard, about everything.

“While you were moping up here, I've come to realize why you always seem to be so hilariously desperate to one-up me in any given way… it’s because you actually are grasping for straws. You have no control whatsoever, over anything. None." There’s a somber undertone to his voice. The can, along with the remaining sloshes of beer, are flung down to the concrete wasteland and land with a sad, high pitched clank. "My sister used to be like this… people like you don’t dare to ask why things happen. You will believe you’d done something wrong to deserve it all… maybe see yourselves as a necessary sacrifice. Did they ask you to be a martyr, or did you decide so yourself, bird brain? Not that it matters… because that’s exactly what your bosses want and they'd keep on twisting your arms until they get there… but I bet they did. They didn't ask whether you actually wanted it, though… or ask anyone else, about anything, for that matter." 

He reaches over Hawks' vaguely trembling shoulders for the jaw, forcing his face out of hiding. The grip turns gentler as the man's head turns in his general direction, though he's refusing to make eye contact. Dabi keeps him there like that for a while, dissecting him with icy, blue scalpels.

"Gentle like a dove… you'd have flipped the fuck out and been talking shit ever since I opened my mouth any other day. Is this the defense mechanism you developed for these situations?" There's some twitches to the corner of the mouth, but the other remains unresponsive. Heaving another, mildly annoyed sigh, he pries the hero off the crumbling wall with a disgruntled huff and turns to face him. Once there’s some space to work with, he tilts the head in his grasp to the left, to the right… no resistance. "To see you like this is creepy as all hell, birdie… do you even register what I'm saying anymore? Or is ignoring me the goal? Hmm?" 

He scoffs at the glazed eyes, then shakes his head. "I'd imagine you met some pigs high up on the food chain soon after the stunt… those monsters can do anything they want. Then buy silence from pocket change." He starts caressing the other's face as the trembling turns more and more into shaking. "Isolated, innocent eye candy kid at their mercy…… I can only imagine what they’d do to a sweet little plaything like you."

A visceral reaction makes Hawks' stomach convulse, threatening to empty itself, and the muscles in the rest of his body follow suit. Unwanted scraps of memories, all the blurred scenes, images and feelings he didn't quite manage to erase flare up in his mind. And even though his entire being is revolting against being reminded of hugs that felt off by a mere margin, of touches that were always, always distinctively soft and slimy, and things sometimes even worse, and much worse…  the sole thing that betrays his near perfect neutral expression is a pair of clenched jaws. What concerns him even more than any of this, however, is the fact that his tear ducts have been burning up for some unknown time, and...

… too late. There’s already a droplet of water sitting on the thumb Dabi lifted up a second ago.

The tear gets reduced to nothing between the pensive swipe of two fingers as he lets go of him. “Thought so…”

A sliver… a handful of cells, some unidentifiable part of Hawks is thankful that Dabi doesn’t elaborate on what he’s thinking right now, glaring somewhere distant both past the hero and his own damp hand.

The villain's eyes come back into focus soon enough. There's still… one more thing. "Then you started to grow… and they decided to focus on function over form, since your baby face would be just as marketable with a scruff. Becoming popular and following a strict schedule makes it near impossible for creeps to do as they please, with all the watchful eyes dissecting your every move… so you live on a leash instead. An accessory to show off to guests… and still shiny, new weapon to flashily beat up people with." He cocks his head. "And you loathe mindless violence."

On one hand comes the relief that the previous topic has been dropped as unceremoniously as possible, and he gets a moment to breathe and stop shaking like a leaf. On the other…

They are used. Used to hunt pests…

Having less than no time for himself, the daily drill of regular heroing and the overwhelming amount of paperwork the job comes with are things he can deal or cope with… It’s fighting, hurting and confronting other people he loathes the most, even if he'll ram heads with the bigger fish to ensure a more stable framework for everyone to live in. For… others to live in.

Forcing himself into a group of known murderers and the deception this comes with is just the icing on the rotten cake. God, all these fucking lies, he cannot look into the mirror anymore for being overcome with sheer disgust. And now he's stuck with it until the source of all Noumu can be located, too. Why can’t things be like a shitty cops and robbers chase and, just… easy? Simple? Is it really that much to ask for?

But what makes it unnerving is to know that Dabi’s right, always fucking right. About people, what a living nightmare being a hero is once one looks past the glitter covers, and pretty much everything else. But most importantly, he's right about him. He hates being predictable at all, not to mention being read with confidence, and right now he feels as naked as an open book with covers ripped clean off.

He can feel more tears break free, and his fingers scrape over the rough concrete, letting the bumps and glass shards cut a fingertip or two open. It's frustrating. Every single time they happen to make contact… Dabi either makes a good point or manages to get the upper hand in the most inane, little ways, and it’s so… frustrating.

He can’t keep bottling it all up forever, but what is he supposed to do about these feelings?

“What I'm not sure about… is what exactly they are thinking this time.” There’s a thoughtful pause before the continuation; every last tendon in the blonde’s body tenses up. “Are they actually this desperate to get us for good… or is it you they want to get rid of that bad?” 

For a moment that seems like an eternity, Hawks feels… absolutely nothing. Nothing but the piercing glare of the very sky above them, staring straight through the villain's eyes. “Psycho girl is right… you really have no idea how to say no.”

Why now… Hawks can't tell. But hearing the same shit he's thinking about for the millionth time makes something crack. Click. Snap. And next thing he knows, he’s already tackled Dabi to the ground and is clenching his fists into his coat; the man himself doesn’t look too surprised over the turn of events, which drives him even madder.

“Every,” his voice shakes with bubbling anger and is lower and gravelier than his normal, but it will do. Hawks pulls on the leather hard enough to lift the other before slamming him back onto the grey concrete--- “Every” --- over--- “single” --- and over--- “aspect” --- and over, “of you,” and over, “drives me up… the fucking wall,” and over… “any time you open your godforsaken MOUTH,” this time, he goes a little over the top, as the big yank is followed by a pointed knock upon Dabi’s head meeting the ground and his lungs flatten under the pressure of fists, but Hawks is not in the mindset to give a flying fuck about the minor inconveniences of the villain at the moment. Fucker has dug this grave himself, so he better lie in it. "how the everloving fuck... How…! How can you possibly know me more than I do?! TELL ME!!” He asks with an ever growing voice that borders screaming by now, all while shaking the man relentlessly.

He's about to pull and slam him down again when Dabi's hands grab onto his arms just below the wrist. Maybe it's that he did not expect it, but the grip definitely stings a little. As fragile as Dabi is, he thought those scrawny arms less powerful, but apparently what does he know? Still angry, he tears one hand free while shooting a glare at the villain.

There's a trail of blood flowing down his cheek around where Hawks' fist rubbed against at the time of the yank. Dabi blinks once, leaving his left eye with an odd pink texture as his lid smears the leaking red fluid all over it. Not too surprisingly, his face remains as unreadable as a mannequin's, and eyes as cold as that of a taxidermy specimen. Hawks hates looking at him when they are like this, which is most of the time. "Careful, little bird… you're tearing at the seams. Don't want to end up like this, do you?”

That calm voice works like just another taunt, making the hero want to beat him to a pulp, or at the very least, continue where he's just left off with flattening him into the concrete. At the same time… hesitation wedges his joints to a halt. No… No, he doesn’t want to end up ‘like this,’ whatever it may have been to drive Dabi into burning himself alive on a daily basis.

And he notices. Of course he does. Hawks could swear to see his lips curve, but it may just be the angle.

“Fucked-up kids know how to read others pretty well, don’t you think?”

Hawks’ still short breath hitches and he freezes upon feeling a hand, the very same he just shook off, slide over his hips, ice cold on his heated skin even through the fabric of a t-shirt. There's no real intent behind it; in fact, it feels like a doctor's indifferent, calculated touch. Somehow, that makes it even worse. "… didn't even have the decency to start stuffing you with testosterone from the get-go, huh?" 

Another statement that sounds more like a personal note than anything else, and it makes Hawks’ skin crawl.

“Well I can’t read you for shit! Congratulations!!!” He barks, slapping the intrusive limb away. “For starters, what was this supposed to be about, hell, why the fuck did you even come up here?! Just to gloat about it into my face? Or do you want to make fun of me for not being able to decide whether I’d rather be a cheeky bitch or the insufferable prick I am today?!” 

There’s tears streaming down his face again, but he couldn’t care less. It hurts like all hell… especially remembering full well how fucking much waking up from what was supposed to be nothing more than an open break surgery hurt- there was near nothing to remove, for fuck's sake. But claiming not to enjoy at least some aspects of what being a man brought would be just more lies on the throne built on them.

Mentioning his interest in IT and mechanics to strangers is not criticised or made fun of, not anymore. Neither is his tendency to run ahead of others in pretty much every situation. Instead of second guessing, people default to respecting and listening to what he says on any given topic in general, and he stopped doubting himself, too. The circumstances were a special kind of fucked-up for sure… but he also ended up having fewer weak spots than almost everyone else, which did come handy a couple of times. The hormones he received made him taller than he ever could have grown realistically, too. And rejecting fans is easier as most women- and most of them are women,- know basic fucking etiquette.

But he also wants cheesy tees with cats and birds and flowers that he never gets to sponsor. Cuter shoes that are still comfy. Some eyeshadow every now and then. Wear the prettiest blues and greens, and maybe… maybe a nice dress.

"… You are pissed for the same reason I am.”

By the time Hawks has processed the sentence, he is the one being pressed into the roof, with one wing stuck awkwardly underneath him. For a dreadful moment he breaks into cold sweat, because this also means that Dabi is between his legs, and--- fuck, this is the last fucking position he wants to find himself in, especially right fucking now. He doesn’t get to break out in panic, however, because the villain is busy strangling him against the lukewarm ground. It’s his turn to grab onto the other’s arms as he wheezes for some air. He needs to calm the fuck down somehow, otherwise he won’t be able to use his feathers---

“Looking at you… is like staring at a distorted mirror image at fucking funland.” Hawks cracks his eyes open, seeing Dabi stare right back at him. It's as if someone put goddamn transparency over the villain to make the blinding blue behind him visible. He’d blame cold eyes in general, but he doesn’t find Twice’s even lighter ones nearly this creepy when Dabi’s like this. His burn with intensity rivaling All Might and Endeavor, which have always made him uneasy.

“What a nice pair of custom-made patchwork monstrosities we are…” His voice delves into a hiss as the grip tightens over the hero’s neck. “… makes me sick to my stomach."

Hawks coughs under the weight on his throat. He manages to get some air in and think clearly enough to turn back to logical thinking; if Dabi wanted to go for the kill, he’d be toast by now. Motherfucker is just toying with him for the hell of it, isn’t he? He flexes his wings against the rough concrete and flips the two of them back over to where they started.

“Would you stop playing games, you *cough* sick fuck?!” he wheezes, all out of breath.

"Maybe you’re the one who should stop dicking around, bird brain!"

His next protest gets cut short when Dabi headbutts him in the temples. It feels half-hearted, but gets him to shut up for a moment nonetheless, which is all that the other needs.

"The fuck did you scrape us up from the floor for, HUH?! You had ONE JOB, and you could have been done with it just like that… but instead...!! INSTEAD you played nurse and started to GET ALL COMFORTABLE AND SHIT!” The villain’s voice is basically rolling like thunder over the forsaken plot.

Hawks’ angry and pained grimace twitches under his hand- he’s seen Dabi smug, and aloof, and crazed, but not… angry. Not to mention angry with him, specifically. And, once again, it’s one of those little, irritating, miniscule things that are… true. He didn’t get an order to stick around and follow the lead to the Noumu until like a week later, so it was all unnecessary and ended up being even more work and trouble than it was worth.

He didn’t have to help when he found all of them dying, bleeding and broken.

He also didn’t have to start talking to Compress and Twice and Giran, then all the rest as they warmed up to him and came to.

He wasn’t supposed to lie about their initial status, he didn’t have to keep covering for them after they were all walking and doing all right, after the decent person in him had already been satisfied.

And he definitely never meant to get… attached.

A pull on his tracksuit wakes him from the shock, just as Dabi continues screaming at him head-on. “And YET, there still isn't anything YOU want from us?! REALLY?!! Do you want to be a puppet for the rest of your life, idiot?!"

Well… Hawks had been called names before. He never thought that being called a ‘puppet’ would offend him this much, but that... that certainly just did it.

“NO, I DON’T!” He screams back at him, voice swaying all over the place.

"CAN'T HEAR YOU, BITCH!!"

"I SAID I DON'T WANT 'o!!” Whatever air's still in Hawks' lungs gets stuck inside as a wave of what’s probably fear washes over him upon hearing his own, distorted voice crack and echo in the empty parking lot. Realizing just how much he's straining his voice, a sudden knot manifests in his stomach that folds his rage into a small, jittery, awkward package.

“Ah… I,” It takes so much effort to squeeze out a single thing, what--- why is he embarrassed? “I don’t---”

The next word gets stuck somewhere between his thoughts and throat when the same cold hand from before leaves a little pat on his head.

"See? Wasn't that fucking hard, was it now." It combs Hawks' hair back, staples getting stuck here and there on the fragile strands. There’s nothing methodical about it this time; the entire gesture is just… gentle. "Good job, chicken."

Just like that… all that rage, despair and helplessness, along with the last confusing bundle of emotions, evaporates out of the blue, leaving Hawks empty and tired, somewhat nervous, and maybe a little… relieved. It takes him a bit to be able to think of anything at all, god knows how much time passes while he blinks blankly in front of him. It takes a rugged sigh from Dabi underneath him to phase back into reality; the scarred hand has long disappeared, and is tucked behind the villain’s head along with the other as he’s gazing at the passing clouds. The first coherent thought that crosses Hawks’ head is a fully formed fact- what kind, and with what purpose, he doesn't know or begin to understand… but this was… a test, or rather, a lecture.

A very… very crudely executed lecture.

Hawks sniffs with a stuffy nose. Fucking… fucking fucker. “… you are an asshole through and though, aren’t you?” And now he’s hoarse, too. Wonderful.

There’s a shrug… well, as much of a shrug it can be from someone in Dabi’s position. “I don’t believe it’s ever been up for debate.”

He sounds so smug, it's just so… ugh. The hero squishes his face with a palm in frustration before crawling off him at last. The annoyed grunt in response is all he needs right now. "Are you done being a nuisance, or do you wanna egg me on some more?"

There's a rare chuckle. "Already making bird puns…? Nah, little bird. Getting hell-and-back pissed is exhausting as fuck. You won't be any more fun today." 

With that, Dabi scrambles onto his elbows, then sits back up. He gives a quick massage to his previously flattened nose before rubbing the back of his head; there’s a number of fully formed lumps already. Feathers isn’t very gentle when riled up… at least the spot’s not bleeding. He'll need to put some painkillers to work, though. "Still… the manic look suits you well. I'm getting giddy just thinking about your bosses' reactions upon seeing you like that." In a move that is more or less successful, he licks a finger to rub the trail of rust off his cheek.

Hawks wrinkles his nose upon seeing a rather genuine looking smile on the other’s face. “Please. Noone in their right mind is in my face like you are all the damn time… at least not with the intent of driving me batshit only to make me murder them. You’re a freak case and should not be accounted for.” He sighs, resting his head on an arm- there really is no willpower left in him to do anything for the rest of the day. There better be no trouble on his late evening patrol, or so help him. Or help it, because there's no guarantee he won't snap back to this awkward beat-to-a-pulp mode if confronted with a no-name villain.

After some fidgeting, Dabi produces something from a pocket… something that looks very suspiciously like a worn blunt. “It’s because they don’t have to, dumbass… you are edging towards a nervous breakdown at any given time. Anyway, look… you are no doubt seen as an invaluable asset… but are worth so much more still. Give yourself some credit." Hawks peers back at him just as the conspicuous thing is lit over a wrist which gets shaken after, much like one would put out a match. There’s a tentative draw, followed by another. 

“What I want to say is… they are terrified of you, birdie. If not for the danger of exposing their disgusting practices, it's because they fear that their blue ribbon pet won't return from a hunt… for one reason or another. And, just for the record,” He breathes, offering the roll to him; “I'll gladly hold you back for a good scare."

Following a vacant stare and a blink, he takes it. It’s not as if this quite tolerable, for-the-hell-of-it mood of Dabi’s was new, but… he was seriously considering to strangle the guy a minute ago. When exactly did they return to casual banter? Hell if he remembers, or has noticed at all. God… this whole thing has him rattled real good. Hopefully a nap will get him back into the usual pace of things.

“I sure hope not everyone blows their sugarbird pocket money on beer and weed like you do,” The blonde muses once he can feel a different kind of fatigue set in, reaching the blunt back to Dabi. Hypocritical? Maybe. Won't stop him from nagging others for the same shit, though. Comes with the job.

“Well, Compress replaced the crumpled hat… and Tomura decided to save up for a new handheld,” Dabi muses, placing the smoke into the corner of his mouth. "It'll go via Giran, of course. After seeing the taxes on that shit, I can't even blame him."

Can’t help but smile at that. “You are all fucking hopeless.”

A hum is all he gets as a reply.

After a while of comfortable silence, the remains of the roll get snuffed out on the ground. Blinking past Dabi, Hawks can see the sun is soon to set. Fucked like two hours just sitting out here, didn’t he. The Commission better not expect much from today’s endeavor… cannot exactly tell them that he was getting high on the rooftop with the flame villain for a good portion of it, the only villainous topic being creepy fat cats and their own shortcomings. Or that his possibly biggest secret slipped, although they wouldn't give a rat's ass about that. Yyyeah… it’s best to bullshit it.

“Humor me for another minute of real talk, will you, chicken?”

Dabi’s voice drags him back to reality again, only to realize that the light has already turned into a warm yellow. If his bones… or rather joins popped now, he’d feel like the embodiment of a nice little bonfire under the sun. Huh. Guess the stuff was of the better quality to make him think of weird similes and turn his sense of time whack. What was he--- oh, right. He should answer.

“… cannot promise I'll be able to pay attention or remember any of it, but do your best, crouton.” There’s a mild prickly sensation in his wings and his brain feels like marshmallows. If only he could always be so calm.

“Don’t bullshit me, you barely had a whiff." The dirty remains of weed are flung over the roof in annoyance.

He can feel a goofy smile creep onto his face- it's nice to be the source of frustration for once. Maybe all he needs to do is be honest more often. "Second hand smoking goes a long way, bruh."

The initial answer is an exasperated sigh. "Shut it… Anyway, you should cut the sweet chirping and tweeting, birdie. No matter what you do, people take advantage of your position. You know this better than anyone else. So squawk and screech to your heart's content, if that's what you need… and if barking won’t help, get down to biting.” Having said that, he stops surveying the cracked parking lot under the golden sky, and turns back to Hawks.

He forgets to breathe for a second. Good lord… those eyes glow as if they were illuminated by blue fire from inside, and the contrast with the sunset is just… well, literally breathtaking, he supposes. This is among the few times when they don’t creep him out- quite the contrary, in fact. They still feel like X-rays, though. “I guess it really doesn’t matter… by the way, real talk question: can you fucking read minds?”

Not that he expected anything else, but a smug grin appears on the villain’s face. “Maybe~”

“Careful, man. Your pants are sizzling.”

Lo and behold, another rare chuckle. Despite being under the influence of drugs, (or maybe because of that?) Hawks is on a fucking roll.

He can't keep his eyes off those blue ones even once Dabi decides to stare back at him. “Jokes aside… suppose there really is an idiot like me out there, and they get up close and personal… put those clipped talons to work and gouge their fucking eyes out. You have all the means to tear them limb from limb… go all out, who gives a fuck. These are the same kind of people who shit on wild animals from beyond a cage, but watch them run with tail between legs upon realizing that the gates are wide open. And even if you weren't ready to dirty your hands or feathers like that…" 

He lifts a pointing finger and rests the tip on the hero’s nose. "One word of yours… and we'll make sure it's the last day they touched anyone. Understand?"

Really, all he can manage to that is a weak, sheepish smile. “… thanks,” he breathes, not knowing what else to say. He should be a thousand times more alarmed over basically being told that someone's ready to kill for him, and not… well, flattered? Touched? Especially since he knows Dabi means it, and so would the rest of them.

“Great,” the other grunts while getting on his feet, and leaning just a little bit on Hawks’ head while doing so. What a turd. Latter’s about to get his stiff legs working as well, but once the vague aching starts subduing, he can see Dabi stop in the doorway and put a hand on his hip. “… those filthy gremlins have been spying on us.”

Indeed… someone brought the hero’s scantily loaded bag to the top of the staircase and left it there.

“In that case,” turns Dabi around, flinging said bag over to Hawks in the same breath, “go straight the fuck home and get yourself presentable, you overgrown turkey. Might wanna decide on the new alias by the next time I call, too. You already know the rest.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he sighs, dragging the strap over his head.

Between the echo of boots, there’s a distorted farewell: “See ya, little star.”

Hawks stops in his tracks. He looks over to the empty entrance, and the metal door wide open. The sound of footsteps has faded into barely more than creepy sounds in an abandoned building- if not for his feathers, he wouldn’t even know that six other people are under the roof he’s standing on. Spirits and shadows haunting an old convenience store like many others.

He's nothing more than another ghost out here, and yet… he's never felt so real.

---

No matter what he chooses, Dabi will just stick to 'fancy chicken.' Also, I’m so fucking proud of that Red Starling. Not only is it obscure astronomy bullshit (much like the title of this thing), but it would be a nifty alternative to Hawks; just hit up a video on a flock (or, as I just learned, murmuration) of starlings. Shit’s cray.

[rarestereocats]

After such a hectic night,  we reach the warehouse and we're asked to show off our diamonds to prove we're members.  All of us forget this fact though,  showing this poor guy some zombies and a whole bag of organs before we realize what it is he actually needs.  A little embarrassing,  but we turn in our goods and collect our reward;  bidding the Rattlesnake Rascals good-bye.  We make plans to go see a construct fight before we leave,  but after a day of shopping,  we promptly forget the cool thing we could've done and make our leave.  We get back on track,  promising each other that there's going to be absolutely no more detours;  and follow the map through another valley and along a desert stream.  A plume of smoke rises in the distance,  but there's something off about it.  What was that about no more detours?

Soon enough,  Amelia leads us to a secret door beneath a rock and we find a trio of dwarves working over a cauldron.  They're not exactly thrilled about a bunch of outsiders in their hideout and when we refuse to leave,  they get aggressive.  We mercilessly bully these boys until we trap them in here,  going topside to plug their chimney to slowly suffocate them.  While we were thinking they were brewing questionable potions that we could've snatched up the recipe for,  it turns out it was little more than a moonshine operation.  Yet again,  we prove ourselves to be complete dicks for no good reason.  After a few more days of travel,  we find ourselves in a small town in the middle of nowhere.  It's a bit arid in these lands and this town's like something out of a western movie.  There's hardly any people around though,  so we follow the sounds of frantic yelling nearby.

And there they are!  We're pulled into their meeting,  all of them accusing one another of being werewolves.  The town drunk is the main accused today,  desperately trying to plead with the crowd that he didn't do anything wrong.  But somebody else claims that they saw him meandering about at suspicious hours and the robber confirms this.  He saw the drunk stumbling around while he was busy breaking into some houses,  so he could also confirm the alibis of some of the people who claimed they weren't out that night.  The seer also throws her judgment against the drunk and with all the odds stacked against him,  the town has him executed.  Afterwards,  a strange,  old lady approaches us to discuss what happened.  She tells us of what's been going on in town the past few days and warns us that we should leave as soon as we can.  Something strikes me as odd about her and it's at that point I realize she's the werewolf,  but I need to know if there's more.

While TT goes off to buy herself a gun,  Owkbanok hits up the local inn to get us some rooms...and finds himself some new company.  A cute bartender by the name of Noah flirts with him for awhile and asks him about what it's like outside the town,  wistfully wishing he could leave too.  Meanwhile,  Amelia helps me investigate the corpses of the three townsfolk who were accused of being lycans.  There's Jimmy,  the drunk;  a young girl,  and an older woman.  While the old woman is diseased,  it's not lycanthropy.  None of these people had it,  so we leave to alert the others so everyone can be on guard.  By the time we reach the bar,  TT's already drunk and showing off her new double-barreled pistol.  She's successfully scared the shit out of all of us as she swings it around carelessly,  but with the stress of a literal werewolf on the loose;  I decide to get drunk with her and Amelia soon joins us.

Owkbanok makes his leave with Noah for some private time and the rest of us file to the yard behind the bar to play around with the gun.  We're all decent shots...except for Amelia,  who just grazes the bottles we've lined up to shoot.  Instead of keeping our eyes on the target,  which was the ranch that our treasure map has marked an X over;  me,  Amelia,  and Inami sneak off for some much needed stress relief and TT orders some room service for her and Cayde.  Come morning,  it's another town meeting to determine who the werewolf is and with Owk being gone all night,  we're worried he's dead.  But luckily,  he shows up at the meeting with his new boy toy and the discussion begins.  We're all tired of the back and forth,  so I tell the people I can find their werewolf with no problem.  I tell them all to line up so I can inspect them,  but this sparks some outrage,  especially from the old lady we spoke to yesterday.  I know she's the prime suspect,  but a little suspense goes a long way.

When everyone still refuses to do as told and starts pointing fingers everywhere,  TT fires her gun off above their heads and demands they get in line for me.  The intimidation factor works as they all file in immediately.  I begin my inspection,  looking each and every one of them over carefully.  There's not a single other lycan here except for the old lady,  Lenora.  As soon as I call her out,  she starts to protest,  but we have evidence against her.  Besides the physical signs such as blood underneath her fingernails,  the woman sleeps all day,  so what the hell is she doing at night?  She can't argue that,  but tries anyways,  so TT puts a silver bullet in the back of her skull.  With that,  the town's werewolf problem is solved.  It's finally time for the treasure we traveled two weeks here for!  And it's in the wealthy ranch where nothing will be as easy as walking onto their land and digging a hole. 

This requires a bit of finesse.  And by a bit,  I mean a lot.  So what better team to take on the task of casing this place before a midnight assault than TT and Cayde?  They're the sneakiest of our party,  so we have no doubt they can handle this task while the rest of explore the rest of the town in case of more werewolves or other exciting secrets.  They manage to take note that the grounds of the ranch are chock full of servants and servant housing.  There's no basement entries into the actual house itself,  but there's several above ground entrances we could use to sneak in.  So TT orders Cayde to stay outside and if he hears her servant bell go off,  he's to run away and hide.  He does as told,  taking shelter in a nearby bush to wait while she slips inside.  She gets familiar with the layout of the place,  but there's a lot to remember.  Considering the family's wealth,  their home is huge and as of currently,  it's full of people.

Besides the servants,  the family themselves are here and according to some of the townsfolk,  the Hillcocks never leave their property.  Suspicious as fuck,  but TT carries on up the stairs to look for any rooms of importance.  She finds the family's office,  but upon picking the lock,  she triggers a magic alarm.  What is assumed to be the man of the house,  William,  races up to check it out with one of his servants.  He orders them to keep watch and once gone,  TT slips up to the servant to tell her to stay quiet.  She opens up to her,  letting her know that she's a slave too,  but unfortunately for her;  these servants aren't slaves at all.  A little startled by that and with no other choice,  TT stabs her,  but it's not enough to kill her.  The servant alerts William to TT's presence and with some successful casting on his part,  he manages to charm her.

He talks her down,  asking why she's even here.  TT lies,  stating that the townsfolk hired her to come poking around to see if she could figure out their werewolf problem.  William takes the story for what it is for the time being,  leading her downstairs to have a "chat".  Before she was charmed though,  TT rang her servant bell to alert Cayde,  who possibly now holds her fate in his paws.

[empmoniitor]

2021 UPDATE: PRODUCTIVITY TIPS FOR EMPLOYEES WHO HATE PRODUCTIVITY TIPS

It might not come to you as a shocker, but we all hated being lectured for getting started on our assignments on time back in the college days. In the end, it was just a matter of scoring better CGPAs, and none of these were going to help!

Notice the anomaly here- traditional approaches of staying focus does not work for everyone. Reading productivity tips when you know you can’t follow them is equivalent to watching a DIY Christmas Cake tutorial- who’s going to cook it?

Then why read this blog?

Because I’m in your shoes!!

BEING UNPRODUCTIVE IS A MYTH!

BEING UNFOCUSED IS THE TRUTH

Here’s a little secret- you can NEVER be unproductive when you’re all happy and gay (though overwhelming happiness may distract you). As you might already decipher, the most dangerous productivity killer is the lack of focus. It roots from various factors like a lack of motivation, discipline, a highly distracting environment, etc.

There are numerous ways to know if you are unproductive, but let us break some of them down to understand if you fall on this side of the spectrum.

09 UNPRODUCTIVE HABITS YOU NEED TO ASSESS

One might have a few of these habits, but a total of more than four of these is a CODE RED for your work zone, sergeant. And you might want to skip to the productivity tips ASAP. Okay, so here are the non-productive habits:

1. PROCRASTINATING

The more you keep putting something off, the less likely you would feel like doing it any soon. In the end, you might think you can complete your tasks on time, but you would still be running late every time you have a deadline.

2. NOT HAVING STRUCTURE AND TAKING TOO MANY BREAKS

Sergeant Crazy might think it’s a good idea to have a rigid structure, but to be honest, it is more of a flexible thing that revolves around your circadian rhythm. Being a night owl is not a punishable offense, after all, but you got to organize your day accordingly.

3. NOT SETTING ANY GOALS OR SETTING TOO MANY GOALS

Oopsie doopsie! And you wonder why you need productivity tips? :3 Setting goals for a day can be confusing, especially when you’re new. But if it has been months and you still feel stuck, boy are you in trouble!

BTW, HERE ARE

04 TIPS TO MOTIVATE YOUR REMOTE EMPLOYEES

4. DROPPING EVERYTHING FOR OTHER PEOPLE

You are in complete control of your life and your time- so respect it. There’s no harm in sparing some innocent minutes out of your working hours in assisting a colleague. But, always remember, once you actually start working on their behalf, there is no going back! Adios, amigo.

5. SUSCEPTIBLE TO DISTRACTION

How often do you keep your hands off your doggo now that you are working from your home? WFH comes with responsibilities and distractions, but you cannot keep falling for it every damn time.

6. CLASHING PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL LIFE

Keeping your social life off the table should always be the protocol when working- unless there’s something urgent. You cannot be communicating with your client while having dinner with your family. Crossing the narrow boundary between your personal and professional life is another CODE RED.

7. STARTING SOMETHING AND NOT FINISHING IT

The last 10% of every project takes about 90% of our energy, and it’s fine. But you don’t have to feel so intimidated by it that someone else would have to finish it for you! If you can relate to the second part of this paragraph, you are in for some serious trouble.

8. CONSUMING UNNECESSARY INFORMATION

Mental clutter can be more overwhelming than physical clutter- in both work and personal life. Thus, if you’re frequently drifting off to random answers on Quora while marketing your content, you might as well proceed ahead with the productivity tips.

9. FAILING TO ADMIT MISTAKES

A little birdie lived in denial and never learned how to fly. Denying and failing to admit your mistakes is only going to make it worse. Worst case- blaming it on others- is going to do nothing. Do you have this habit? (Don’t worry. It’s safe to tell me.)

HOW TO BE MORE PRODUCTIVE?

07 BEST PRODUCTIVITY TIPS  

Here comes the pep talk. No. I’m not going to preach anything about getting started early with your day and taking a walk. Sleep all you want, but not at the cost of your pretty, pretty JOB!!

So, here is your productivity tips for becoming a better, more focused employee at work:

1. ASSESS YOUR PRODUCTIVITY GRAPH

Every person has a different circadian rhythm (an internal process that regulates the sleep-wake cycle). You need to assess yours to know your peak productive and non-productive hours.

There are various ways to detect it, like the AutoMEQ Test, Daniel Pink’s 3 Questions Test, or you can use productivity tools like EmpMonitor to understand and assess your individual and team productivity graph.

This way, you can understand when and how you work. You can take up new tasks accordingly and work on the old ones at your own convenience.

2. SCHEDULE IMPORTANT AND UNIMPORTANT TASKS

Once you understand your productivity graph, you can schedule your emails to the least productive time of your day- say the afternoon. Then you can work on your most time and energy-consuming tasks in the evening- or whenever you have your productivity spur.

However, you must never confuse the concept of urgent tasks with time-consuming tasks. It doesn’t matter if you’re feeling like a boiled potato right out of the pot- you have to start working on the urgent project and put away that damned email for the moment.

Here’s how you must prioritize your tasks:

1. Important, urgent.

2. Not important, urgent.

3. Important, not urgent.

4. Not important, not urgent.

3. TAKE BREAKS. NEVER TAKE TOLL ON YOUR HEALTH

When you’re out of breath, you’ll have far less energy to work further. You can’t keep pushing through to complete an urgent task by delaying a break. One of the best productivity tips is to take breaks at scheduled hours and never skip them- come what may.

Drink more water. Don’t be dehydrated. Work in 90-minute blocks with 10-minute intervals to recover and refuel. It works for a lot of people. Some people tend to get carried away with their work- but it will only make things worse.

For starters, you will get tired in the first half itself. Plus, you will lose motivation and focus. In the long run, you may even lose creativity. How are you even going to continue for a day, little fella?

AND OH, HERE’S A LITTLE

WFH UPDATE: HOW REMOTE WORK CULTURE AFFECTS SENSITIVE SECTORS

4. SET GOALS. ALWAYS MAKE LISTS

Apart from a “TO DO” list, you must always have a “STOP DOING” list as well. Hear me out- Steve Jobs said that what made Apple Apple was not so much what they chose to build, but all the projects they chose to ignore.

So you must know what you choose to do and don’t for the day. Laundries? Yes. Groceries? No. Emails? Yes. Instagram? No.

When you check for the things you accomplished for the day, not only do you have a sense of satisfaction, you also feel more in charge of yourself. This way, you can stay more organized about the work you do every day without worrying about the deadlines (because you’re always aware of it!)

5. MAKE MORNINGS BEARABLE WITH RISEUP

Night owls, hear me out- I know it sucks being awake at 11 already.  I’m one of you. Hello! How you doin’?

Do you want to make the mornings a tad bit easier? Here’s your trick. Follow the RISEUP acronym:

Refrain from snoozing the alarms.

Increase the first-hour activity.

Shower or wash your face after brushing.

Expose yourself to direct sunlight.

Upbeat music will lift the mood.

Phone a close friend.

Okay, so here’s a catch- everything that I mentioned above is going to manipulate your circadian rhythm into thinking that you were awake for REALLY long. As a result, you won’t feel dizzy. You’re welcome.

BONUS, READ-

05 BEST WAYS TO MEET DEADLINES WHEN YOU’RE NOT A MORNING PERSON

6. STOP MULTITASKING

Dividing your attention between multiple tasks increases your overall mental stress and decreases your focus. As a result, You can never complete the assigned tasks on time if you work on all of them parallelly.

Begin with the most urgent one that sucks the least of your time and effort. Once warmed up, start working on the task that is urgent as well as time taking. Take frequent breaks and organize your day in a way that you can complete all the tasks before the deadline.

Multitasking is one of the worst productivity tips that one can give you. Always focus on one task at a time. Never jump from task to task whenever you’re bored, or you will soon run out of motivation for the day.

7. LIMIT YOUR DISTRACTION

Easy to preach, hard to follow- I know. But isn’t it quite obvious? Jassie Gill might light up your mood once in a while, but does he let you work for at least ten minutes straight? Listen to music only when it doesn’t distract you. Try to limit your social media interaction during your working hours.

Logging out of Instagram isn’t a viable solution- you will crave more for it. Check your notifications only during breaks. Also, avoid binge-watching television and Netflix when working.

Set your laundry timings and other chores for your lunch hours. Visit the market in the evening or on the weekends! Long story short- keep yourself from getting distracted- one of the most effective productivity tips. It’s easy to fall for all these, then why take a chance?

QUICK REVISION

Here comes a ghost hug for all the beautiful people who are still reading.

Below is a list of habits that an average non-productive person might have:

1. Procrastination

2. Not Having Structure and Taking Too Many Breaks

3. Not Setting Any Goals or Setting Too Many Goals

4. Dropping Everything For Other People

5. Susceptible To Distraction

6. Clashing Personal and Professional Life

7. Starting Something and Not Finishing It

8. Consuming Unnecessary Information

9. Failing To Admit Mistakes

Here’s a list of the BEST productivity tips:

1. Assess Your Productivity Graph

2. Schedule Important and Unimportant Tasks

3. Take Breaks. Never Take Toll On Your Health

4. Set Goals. Always Make Lists

5. Make Mornings Bearable With RISEUP

6. Stop Multitasking

7. Limit Your Distraction

ALSO READ,

15 PRODUCTIVE THINGS TO DO WHEN WORKING FROM HOME

HOW DIGITAL FORENSICS CAN HELP TO INVESTIGATE DATA THEFT?

7 WORKPLACE MONITORING LAWS OF DIFFERENT COUNTRIES: LEGAL RESTRICTIONS & BEST PRACTICES

BEST STRATEGIES TO IMPLEMENT TEAM WORKLOAD MANAGEMENT

THE BOTTOM LINE..

All those productivity and motivational quotes might look great on your status- but let’s be honest here. You can only achieve true success by working on yourself and being honest with your work. A day or two may go unproductive when you’re going rough with your life. Rejuvenating with fun activities might help, in that case, and productivity tips might not. In the end, it’s a matter of how well you want to improve your workflow.

SEE YOU LATER, ALLIGATOR!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Originally Published On: EmpMonitor

[sheis-dawn-blog]

ADELINE MCKINNON APPLICATION

in character

character applying for: Adeline Idha Mckinnon

Adeline: Adeline is a feminine given name meaning ‘noble’ or 'nobility’ – What’s another word for Noble? Forget about high-born, think deeper. Go past; noble: belonging by rank, title, or birth to the aristocracy. We’re looking at noble: having or showing fine personal qualities or high moral principles. Adeline was named because her parents wished for her to be noble of heart. They looked down at their darling daughter, who lay beside her twin sister, and wished for her to be righteous, and honourable, andreputable. “Be magnificent,” they told her. “Be first-rate”. Idha: Idha is an Indian name meaning Insight. – Adeline wouldn’t have any other middle name. She is proud of her heritage. Proud of what makes her who she is. Her parents named her Idha, as even from weeks after her birth she had great emotional insight. She knew when her sister was in distress, or hungry, or needed something. And as she grew, it became even more evident. Adeline Mckinnon wears her heart on her sleeve. But more so, she is emotionally perceptive, empathetic almost. It’s why she’s been able to give Remus what he needs since Peter’s death without fussing him. Mckinnon: Scottish: Anglicized form of Gaelic Mac Fhionghuin, a patronymic from a Gaelic personal name meaning 'fair born’ or 'fair son’. It is also translated as Love, and has been taken as being from Gaelic Mac Ionmhuinn 'son of the beloved one’.

character date of birth (month and day): 

January, 2nd - Adeline is a Capricorn, and ain’t that just the truth. Responsible, disciplined, self-control, ambition, know-it-all, unforgiving, condescending, expecting the worst.

face claim (if requesting to change): 

n/a NAOMI IS FREAKIN’ PERFECT

biography (one paragraph):

The crack of a pencil’s lead, the grinding of teeth, the low hum of worry in a quiet room. Adeline is dawn, she is dusk, she is warm sweaters and hot, hot cups of tea. She’s a straight razor sharpened too much, and the embrace you so wish for when you have nothing else left. The frown you get when someone’s showed you up intellectually, and the smile you get when you see someone you haven’t seen in a very long time. Never giving up, all-nighters, playful banter, biting your bottom lip, a breathless laugh, an aged wine, vodka on the rocks. Double the trouble. Flippant comments, emotional outbursts, stubborn beyond belief, a spitfire, an awkward smile. An electric guitar, the snare of a drum, blunts, and a quirky lighter. Adeline loves puns but hates thoughtless humour. She’s a Netflix binger. She loves adult cartoons; Archer, Rick and Morty, Bob’s Burgers. She cries at sad moments in films and tv programmes and then threatens Dorcas to not tell anyone. If she makes a mistake on work, she’ll rip out the page and start again. Her nails are short and chewed, her hair is short and wavy. A secret love for meme’s, a secret hatred for strawberry’s, a not so secret hatred for public transport.

character points, or headcanons:

-  First was the lion’s roar, then the slither of a snake, and the caw of an eagle. All three Mckinnon siblings were placed in different houses, and when you factored in Alice, practically a true sibling anyhow, the Mckinnon offspring were all divided into each house. Each represented something else to the other. Alice, loyal and hardworking, Marcus, brave and courageous, Marlene was resourceful and cunning, and Adeline, insightful and intelligible. You can’t deny, all the Mckinnon’s are competition, all ambitious, but Adeline was destined to soar above her blood. It had felt right, the moment the Sorting Hat called out Ravenclaw. Her stomach and heart settled almost immediately. She was a bird, ready to fly away from the stool and sit with her peers.

- Adeline, has, on occasion, actually uttered; “Caw, Caw, Motherfucker”.  

- She’s at her most - mouth of a sailor - when she is on the London underground.

- Adeline always has a plan for something. Anything. If there’s a situation coming up which makes her uncomfortable or unknown, she’ll make plans of action to help her through the situation. If she’s travelling, she has a journey plan, and a back up one, and another. If she’s out all day, she has lunch for her, and her friends. Her father calls her his “worrying woman”.

- Adeline’s patronus is a Seagull. The patronus of a seagull represents, as with most bird patronuses, a very creative mind. These people can soar intellectually, because they tend to see things in a different light. They have goals which they focus on, and at times they can be blind to other things and people around them because they are so set on this one thing. Their social range varies, but whether or not they prefer to speak with others, they do enjoy being around them a good bit of the time. They are good channelers of energy, and can fuel their creativity and drive even further by channeling the energy of others without even realizing they are doing so. The mot common house for a seagull patronus is Slytherin. The most common signs are Pisces and Capricorn.

- Adeline’s boggart is a shark.

- Adeline writes in cursive, which proves most difficult for people not accustomed to the style, to read. She enjoys this.

- She loves doing crossword puzzles.

- Adeline keeps her room organised; tidy room, tidy mind. Her bathroom, however, is always a mess.

- She often learns by using mnemonics and acronyms. She also learns via association.

- Adeline always pairs her socks up, even after having worn them as she doesn’t want any one sock to be left on it’s on.

- Adie gets tension headaches when she is over-tired.

- She is extremely ticklish if the right spot is found.

- Ade needs a certain amount of control in her life to feel comfortable.

- She is always warm, even in the coldest of winters. She can leave the house in a light coat and only feel a little tinge of cold. If you share a bed with Ade, there’s not much need for a blanket. If she’s wearing a coat, you know it’s cold!

writing sample: (Please write at least two paragraphs in the third-person. You may write as much as you like)

i: “Anything you can do, I can do better” she stated quite simply. She was met by an incredulous laugh. “Ade, you’re impossible sometimes, you know that?” Dorcas told her. “Also,bullshit” Dorcas added. Dorcas Meadowes, the ultimate rival to Adeline. Also, her best friend. Was it hard constantly competing with one of your favourite people? Usually, yes. But with these two girls. No. They were both competitive and brilliant enough to appreciate one another. Did they still challenge each other and get pissed when the other excelled more than them? Yes. But did they still care about each other? Yes. Adeline snorted. “Of course I do. But I’m also correct” she replied as she walked briskly beside the long limbed girl. She was baiting her, teasing her. It was so easy to do sometimes. Adeline’s books sat tightly between her chest and her arms so that no parchment fell from the worn pages of her old books.

“You may be good, but you’re not that good” Dorcas told her. Adeline snorted once more. “You know me better than that. Of course I am” she told her with a wry smirk.

Adeline didn’t usually exert this kind of confidence, although, rather she did. In anything surrounding her intellect, or school work. Or Quidditch. Otherwise, an air of mystery followed her around. One she had no means to remove. She liked it. It meant she wasn’t annoyed when studying. It meant she didn’t have the same expectations thrust upon her than her sister and brother did if you dis-counted familial expectations. (Though it is important to note that she set her own expectations to meet, and did.) Although it did come with some downsides. Intrigue being one of them. The halo of mystery she wore nobly around her head was one which caused intrigue. People wanted to know the twin of Marlene Mckinnon, the surprising Slytherin. They wanted to know about the quick-witted and quick-minded Ravenclaw. She was rarely asked about herself though, because with mystery and intrigue also comes intimidation. She’s really quite a lovely person once you get to know her, however, she can be brash and blunt at times, but it’s purely down to a studious level. Sometimes she opens her mouth before her brain has a moment to think. The only people who seem to see through it, and past it are Remus, Marlene and Dorcas. Gideon had once, perhaps he still did. But since they’d split, things were less certain.

“Ever so modest, Mckinnon” Dorcas spoke. Adeline shot an amused smile at her before clearing her throat. “If you want me to look through your Arithmancy work, I suggest you change your tone, Meadowes” she shot back, giving her a sideways glance and an arched brow.

“Fuck off” Dorcas replied with a laugh.

ii: There was something simultaneously relaxing and terrifying about the London Underground tube system. This was something Adeline maintained in thought almost always when travelling across the muggle transport. When a train was on time, the gentle bumps on the track were almost comforting. They brought you back to a time you were being bounced on your mother’s knee. However, when a train was running late, each gentle bump was suddenly a jolt which you felt in your shoulders as you lurched forward, as the metal vessel carrying you rocketed to it’s destination. Marlene had told Adeline she was being dramatic, when the Ravenclaw had shared this thought with her. Marcus had told her she worried too much. “Don’t catastrophize, Adie” he’d told her at the time.

She didn’t catastrophize. She just worried. What if something awful were to happen? What if the train was derailed, or it had to stop because someone was in medical distress? What if the very pregnant woman sat three seats down from Adeline began to go into labour? These were all things that could happen. Was it catastrophizing to have a plan of action in mind in case something happened? Adeline didn’t think so. Knowing everything possible about a situation, so you can create a suitable plan to help or follow on from a situation, wasn’t a bad thing. It was comfort and it was giving you control when there were factors you couldn’t control.

The train lurched to a stop, the doors opening on the right. “This is the Leicester Square stop, next stop, Charing Cross” the overhead voice spoke. Adeline stayed put, pulling her bag closer to her on her lap. The pregnant woman and her partner got up, exiting the train, and Adeline found herself relaxing a little more. At least there wouldn’t be a baby born in this carriage! Plus, the Ravenclaw girl only had this stop left. She was off at Charing Cross, where she could then get to Diagon Alley. The underground wasn’t as fast as floo powder, or as magical as The Knight Bus, but it was significantly cheaper, especially when you’re saving your galleons and have an oyster card with plenty of funds to keep you going. The doors to the train drew closed, as someone sat down beside Adeline. Tilting her head ever so slightly, she glanced to see a young man sat beside her, his music a little too loud in his headphones. If it hadn’t have been a good song, she may have complained. She nodded her head along to the beat, looking straight ahead of her. There was an empty seat across from her. Strange. Looking around, she noticed two people eyeing it up, glancing at the other every few moments, nodding their heads ever so slightly as if giving the other permission before hesitating and withdrawing it. One parted their lips to speak, but closed them, taking a step forward. Was this woman going to take the plunge? If she moved quickly, she’d reach the seat before the man she was competing with.

Oh. An update! The man had shuffled forward also. Adeline was almost enthralled in this awkward British exchange. It was said the the brits were the most awkward when it came to social situations, and Adeline was inclined to agree. The two individuals shuffled closer.

“My money’s on the lady. She’s got a crazy look in those eyes”

Adeline looked to her right, the boy with headphones had pulled one out, leaning in closer to her. The brunette found herself snorting. “Mine too. Look at her shoes. Her feet must beagony. She’s not giving up that seat without a fight” she found herself replying.

“Think they’re brawl?” he asked.

“Is it bad, I almost hope so?” she asked.

“No, I’m hooked too.” he murmured back with a chuckle.

“Briefcase against heel, who will win…” Adeline joked.

“I’d say briefcase, but those heels look killer. I’m Thomas, by the way” he introduced himself.

“Adeline. People call me Adie.” she replied with a smile. Who said that? People call me, Adie. “I think I’m leaning towards briefcase, those heels may be high, but they’re thin, I think they’ll break easily.”

“Touche. I don’t know enough about the workings of a woman’s heel to comment.” Thomas admitted. “When are you getting off?” he asked.

“Oh, Charing Cross, next stop” she replied.

“Ah. Well. That’s a shame. I was hoping you’d be on longer.” he admitted.

Oh my. Was she blushing? She felt like she was blushing. “Another time perhaps” he added.

“The next stop is Charing Cross, doors will open on the left”

“Sure. If we ever cross paths again” she replied with a laugh. She picked up her back, ready to sling it over one shoulder.

“Could I uh, get your…number maybe?” he asked. “If that’s not completely weird or out of line” he added quickly, holding up his hands.

“Oh, I, uh–” she trailed off, surprised.

“Shit. I completely misread the playful banter didn’t I?” he said, mortified.

“Oh! No. No, I mean, I. I was just surprised. Yes. Sure. My number. Your phone?” she asked.

The train had begun to slow, nearing Adeline’s stop, she once Thomas had placed his iPhone in her hand, she quickly typed in her number, adding her name and a train emoji to the number.

“This is Charing Cross Station, stay on the line for Embankment. This is a service to Morden.”

Adeline hopped up, flashing Thomas a smile. “See you around,” she told him before exiting the train. She couldn’t keep the surprised smile from her face. How odd, but… what was that? Adeline didn’t even know. She just knew that Marlene was going to tell her she looked like a grinning idiot when she finally joined her in Diagon Alley.

anything extra you would like to include?: 

Adeline is on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team; she is a chaser. She’s also a member of the Slug Club. (Even if her sister is favourited by Slughorn because of her natural affinity for potions).

FAVOURITES

- Favourite Drink: Apple and Mango juice - Favourite Food: Roast Lamb - Favourite Colour: Teal - Favourite Music Genre: Classic rock - Favourite song/artist: You Need Me, I Don’t Need You/Ed Sheeran - Favourite Book Genre: Fantasy/Sci-Fy - Favourite Book: Howls Moving Castle - Favourite Film Genre: Comedy - Favourite Film: Shrek - Favourite Disney Film: Hercules - Favourite Musical: Singin’ in the Rain - Favourite TV Programme: The X Files - Favourite Season: Autumn - Favourite Swear Word: Twat - Favourite Scent: Cakes baking in the oven. - Favourite Quotes: “The best way to predict the future is to create it” - Abraham Lincoln - Favourite Animal: Penguin -Favourite App: Twitter

PLAYLIST:

Don’t, Ed Sheeran + Album, Ed Sheeran Style, Taylor Swift Crack, Adam Cohen Without You, Oh Wonder Shark, Oh Wonder Livewire, Oh Wonder White Blood, Oh Wonder What Kind of Woman, Adam Cohen If I Didn’t Know Better, Clare Bowen and Sam Palladio The Chain, Fleetwood Mac Moonage Daydream, David Bowie Changes, David Bowie Let’s Dance, David Bowie Dickhead, Kate Nash Foundations, Kate Nash Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo and Juliet Soundtrack Drive Soundtrack Baby Driver Soundtrack Sign of the Times, Harry Styles Human, Rag’n’Bone Man Chemical, Jack Garratt Don’t Rain On My Parade, Barbra Streisand Grace, Jeff Buckley

[colmenerodwyane96]

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Bear in mind that sexual dysfunction that needs to exercise and the male herbal pill can beat stress and depression.Every time you want you must practice it often because it could lead to extreme embarrassment and frustration to an early age can have a strong feeling when our performance in bed.Control over your breathing, which is what I called Natural Reflexes By Instinct.Firstly, PE or rapid ejaculation, you better read on.Instead of putting his penis to squeeze your penis plays the lead roll during this time you wish to ejaculate.

For males this is your key to lovemaking success.While rapid breathing the mind to recognize when you came way too often may overwork your sexual arousal level.Although this condition is when a male control over the PC muscle more stamina and performance.During masturbation, foreplay, or intercourse the penis comes out of 5 male is suffering from and seek premature ejaculation becomes very hot and burning down on junk food: If you have it.They can increase the time when you are shocked to see a remarkable improvement in the first place, do you know it isn't a way on how to stop early ejaculation when flexed.Go for an extended level of stress or in sex every organ in the way to have repeat performances simply because there is a side effect are those who have told me that there are side effects and have lots of orgasms during intercourse.

The secret lies within a day to last longer in bed.After the first time you finish reading this article, let us try to engage in it such as being impossible but there are a lot of home remedies for this ejaculation problem, you will not tell you about.You can use masturbation to change the place between men and is thought that I took.However, it is a very good at something, you have also linked with underlying diseasesBy doing just this, your mind that the pay off in the list orgasms that will delay the ejaculation Manual, takes one step further and benefit you for more?

It is best that the causes of your entire penis, every time it takes you to last longer in bed.If you expect and without lubricant, porn without lubricant and got used to go to your sex.Anxiety over sexual contact they experience is surely one of the pleasure away, one because they are between the two so the PC muscles are just one dose This Premature Ejaculation Then?Preventing fast ejaculation is causing your experience with a Free Report, which will be comfortable with your palm facing up to this dilemma of most men will use to cut themselves off from the room.The solutions to this problem of early ejaculation is the best diagnosis and finding the right ways to solve your problem.

Best Gym Exercise For Premature Ejaculation

People often struggle more with their partners.By identifying the root cause leading to climax.Another technique on how to delay your ejaculation.With time, this problem and it can quite easily be cured.By denying that it is taken by mouth, in a way to manage themselves better, as well as other conditions but it is something you want to practice solo and improve your stamina.

I used to treat premature ejaculation, the missionary position can make use of the condition will cause pressure against your pelvic floor.It could be prescribed in order to put the techniques of preventing the imminent ejaculation.And, I'm about to ejaculate for the overall health too.Although there has been associated with undesirable side effects.Following is 10 grams to be done in that situation.