#and unpacking is stressful
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I totally forgot till just now but one time a new therapist handed me a pad of paper and said "draw me a picture of how you feel" and after spending like five whole minutes of dead silence scribbling a teeny tiny pitch black dot in the middle of the pad that dug a hole straight through like 15 pages I gave it back to see him staring back at me like
#I don't know if he realized how much stress I was unpacking#Or if it was about the notepad I ruined#But looking up and seeing that was very funny#He was a chill dude we got shit handled
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fuck
#vent#actually borderline#tw torture#tw death#we’ll long story short i’m homless and crashing on a friend’s couch#for two more weeks#which is incredibly stressful#can’t move in to my new place until the 14th#im not excited about moving AT ALL#glad i’ll be reunited with my cat#i just despise the manual labor (not to mention what it does to my disabled self)#and unpacking is stressful#also i had to soak all my clothes and shit in vinegar and pet odor removal#so i have to do that for the remainder of my clothes and like most of my shit that’s in my storage unit currently#that i have to move#whatever#everything is stressful#also i had therapy today which was good but also intense asf#we talked abt mom and deprogramming me and exposure therapy#super unfun
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I think it's incredibly important to remind folks on testosterone or folks who want to reverse patterned baldness about their options, but man, does it sometimes suck wondering how much of our insecurities about our hair stem from backwards beliefs that to strive towards beauty is not only preferable but "makes you good."
As someone with a rather masculinized body pre-medical transition, patterned baldness has always seemed neutral. Hair is incredibly important (hell, much of my own energy is spent on my hair because I like it), but the pressure to have hair, to have hair the "right way" is something that I absolutely loathe.
I'm not here to judge people who don't want patterned hair loss or baldness, I'm here to say that those traits will never make you lesser. Not only is it neutral, but it is also just as worthy and beautiful.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#this especially goes for folks who may be transfem or trans women experiencing patterned hair loss/baldness#i love you and think you are gorgeous<3#i mentioned trans folks going on t because that's a lot of my own experience#i already had a somewhat masc hairline before t and now it's just settling in...#...i found that i'm fortunate in that way for having an already masculine body and i think that's why my changes are more...#...like unpacking your house rather than moving to a new home if that makes sense#but i find that the beauty culture around hair adds even more unnecessary stress for those who want or value their hair#i am beauty culture's number one hater
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Today has been a day. Just a lot of hospital stress this week between my mom and my husband's surgeries and this is how it's coming out (they're both fine and are recovering well).
~~~
Dick finds Tim in a waiting room at Gotham General, slumped in a faded blue plastic chair that's seen better days. At some point during the day, his brother had been immaculately dressed for the office. But now, his blue pin-striped suit is wrinkled, his collar is unbuttoned, and his shirtsleeves have been rolled up. There was a tie somewhere as Dick knows Tim never leaves home without one on an office day, but it's anyone's guess as to where it currently is.
"Hey. I got here as fast as I could," he says, taking the open seat beside Tim. He did too, calling Wally as soon as he got the news from Barbara. "How's Jason?"
Tim opens his eyes, giving him a look that is more dead than alive. "Still critical."
Pain lances through Dick at the two words. He'd lost Jason once before and the guilt from being off world when his Little Wing needed him the most still ate at him in the darkest parts of his psyche. And now, here he is sitting with another brother he never thought he'd have, one who's been through so much trauma and loss of his own--and who is on the verge of possibly losing another loved one.
A car-pedestrian accident. The gall of something so normal and mundane having the potential to take out the Red Hood--or any of them for that matter--is enough to make Dick want to punch the taupe wall of this dreary waiting room.
To be honest, he's rather surprised none of the others are here yet. Well, expect Bruce. He's off world with the JL and...
Oh.
Oh.
"Do you think Bruce knows yet?"
Tim's shrug is so minute Dick might have missed it if he wasn't watching closely. "Can't say I care right now. He and Jay got into another of their big fights before he left. Said if Jay can't clean up his act, then don't bother coming back."
Dick winces and easily reads between the lines of what Tim isn't saying given their semi-public place. Even in Bludhaven, he'd heard about the execution-style murder of a known pedophile--and that it was the Red Hood who'd done it.
"He didn't do it, Dick," Tim whispers, catching his gaze as tears build in his eyes. "I was there. I know he didn't. But Bruce didn't listen to either of us, said I was covering for him because he's in my pants." Those last words are practically spat out. "I think this is the first time I've ever felt like I hate him. He just doesn't listen!"
That's a feeling Dick knows all too well. He also knows now why the others aren't here--that Barbara called him first because Tim doesn't need just comfort.
He needs his big brother.
Dick slides from the chair to kneel on the floor in front of Tim. "Now that is something I know a lot about." He takes Tim's hands and squeezes them firmly. "I'm not going to tell you it'll get better. I'm also not going to say you need to be the bigger person and forgive him. What I am going to tell you is that I believe you and that I believe in Jason."
Tim's breath hitches and he falls into Dick's open arms sobbing. Thank yous fall from his lips and into Dick's jacket. Tears fill his own eyes as he remembers another time where he didn't believe this little bird, his first Robin.
Time hasn't necessarily dulled the guilt, but it has given him perspective. He'd done what he thought best at the time and owned up to it when he'd been proven wrong--a trait not shared by their mentor and father-figure.
"We'll get through this together," Dick soothes, running a hand up and down Tim's back. "You, me, and everyone else. We're all here for you and we're all pulling for Jason."
As he speaks, he glances up and spots Alfred hurrying down the hall with Damian and Duke in tow. Both boys are still dressed in their school uniforms, so Alfred must have pulled them out early. Behind them are Cass and Steph, hands held tightly.
"We're all here," he repeats, nudging Tim's chin to make him look up. "And we're not going anywhere."
#chibinightowl writes#dick grayson#tim drake#background JayTim#there's a lot to unpack here#but it's mostly just brotherly bonding#and me needing to word vomit in some capacity#stress is a bitch#yes I'm fine#just need sleep
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"Can you two manage not to tear each other apart while I'm gone?"
Bruce, Jason, and Tim (With JayTim or maybe even BruJayTim)
send a quote and a ship and I'll write a short fic!
god, this one was so good. so, you get the catch-22 of this being a bit longer, 4.5k, but with the warning, i have not edited it so it might be a little rough. but the whole point of this is quick fun so! this is basically Tim and Jason trying to kill each other bc they're under the influence of a toxin. both have a relationship with Bruce and are mad about it. it does end in some short JayTim porn and an implied BruJayTim ending. you could argue dub-con, but it's mostly consensual. enjoy <3
Tim honestly would’ve preferred if it was fear toxin or Joker venom.
Those, he at least knew the tricks for dealing with. How to keep his heart rate down, how to focus and not give in to his body’s adrenaline response. And even if none of those failed, the worst of the fear toxin was just something Tim could wait out while playing distracting music.
This was different.
Anger was different.
“It looks like someone took Crane’s compound and modified it,” Bruce, the lucky bastard who had managed not to inhale the substance, was stood perfectly calm in front of the Batcomputer. “It’s difficult to tell though without a direct sample.”
“If you would just let me look at it maybe we could get somewhere,” Tim hissed through grit teeth, aiming a lethal scowl at Bruce. His nails were digging into his palm. He frowned and tried to take a break. “I’m sorry.”
Bruce looked over his shoulder at Tim with concern and pity. “Are you sure you don’t want to be tranquilized until I synthesize the cure?”
“Bruce, if you try to get close enough to tranq me, I’ll probably try to rip your larynx out with my teeth,” Tim said. The itch for violence sat right underneath his fingertips. He was desperate for it, already twitching at the thought.
Logic and reasoning were hard to hold onto. Every straight thought Tim had was immediately consumed by the fire of fury, burned into something unrecognizable.
Tim didn’t feel like himself when he was angry. That was the worst part. He never liked his anger before and now, it was the only part of him on display. An ugly and twisted thing.
“He could just shoot you with a tranq dart,” Jason said smoothly. “I’d pay to see it.”
Jason was also affected by the rage toxin, though compared to Tim, he looked barely bothered. His head was tilted back to rest against the back of his chair, eyes closed. Both hands were in his lap, fingers calmly laced. His hands were forced together by the same cuffs that Tim was also wearing. Tim had suggested the cuffs when he tried to claw out Bruce’s eyes because Bruce put a hand on his shoulder. Despite Jason’s lack of reaction, it was universally decided to also put Jason in the cuffs. The handcuffs were chained to the chairs Tim and Jason were sitting in, with at least six feet’s distance between them so they couldn’t try to grab each other.
Which Tim had done at least a half a dozen times by now.
“If you’re not going to have helpful input you can keep your goddamn mouth shut,” Tim snapped, holding himself still in the chair from trying to launch across the room again. His muscles were so tense from clenching them that he was starting to shake.
“Tim,” Bruce said softly, giving him a look. Bruce was perfectly fine if Tim snapped at him. But when Tim snapped at Jason, he got a stern reprimand.
Which only pissed Tim off more.
He didn’t understand how he was fine with Bruce sleeping with both of them now. The thought was ridiculously enraging, how he could allow Bruce to even be around Jason Todd. It usually didn’t bother Tim, and was one of the things Tim accepted about Bruce. The lack of monogamy.
But now? Staring at Jason’s smug face that Tim itched to break? It made Tim’s blood boil.
He was more important and useful to Bruce than Jason could ever be. And Tim didn’t have a pile of bodies on his ledger. He actually knew he to behave like a person and not a wild animal.
Ironic how they looked now, then.
Jason’s face split into a feral grin. He leaned forward. “Yeah, Tim,” his tone mocked the one Bruce used. “Let’s behave ourselves.”
Tim could see it in Jason’s eyes. How angry he was, how he was holding back everything that Tim couldn’t. His little show was a facade and Tim damn well knew it.
He wanted to rip Tim apart just as badly.
Now it was Jason who Bruce gave the look to. “This is easier for you to control than it is for him, Jason. Don’t try to provoke him.”
Tim hated how he was spoken about as if he wasn’t even there. Like he was some hapless child throwing a temper tantrum that Bruce was indulging, but sharing quiet whispers about with the real adults.
Like he thought Jason could control himself better than Tim just because Jason had experience with the Lazarus Pit, making him less susceptible to anger manipulation.
At least that was the working theory, currently. Jason’s working theory was simply that he was better than Tim. It was when he said that, that Tim suggested the handcuffs. He had enough of his wits left about him to know he’d sort of regret killing Jason Todd, no matter how badly he wanted to right now.
Jason just shrugged at Bruce’s words and relaxed back into his chair, crossing his legs. “He shouldn’t be so easily provokable then.”
“You know damn well-” Tim started.
“Timothy.” Bruce put a command in his voice that he rarely used with Tim. It made Tim straighten on instinct. The endless patience Bruce had was getting worn more and more thin with every jab and insult traded between Tim and Jason. He looked like he was at his wit’s end. “Don’t listen to him.”
A slow, deep breath did nothing to calm Tim’s nerves. He bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood and then resisted the urge to spit it at Bruce. “B, I love you, but you have no idea how hard this is. Especially around him of all people.”
The look that crossed Bruce’s face was pained. They always danced around the elephant in the room, that was Bruce accepting Jason back into the fold a little too quickly for everyone’s comfort. It was his soft spot showing. Even when Tim wasn’t under the influence of a drug he didn’t like it and had tried several times to warn Bruce that Jason was a lost cause.
It’d caused a lot of arguments on their best days. Weeks of not speaking to each other on their worst.
And because Tim was the dutiful partner, the loving Robin, he always gave in first. Bruce needed him. In some ways, romantically. But in most ways, Bruce just needed genuine companionship from someone who wasn’t batshit crazy and murdering drug lords like it was a sport. That was Tim’s job. A job he liked, even.
Not that he was too fond of it right now.
They both knew, deep down Bruce had desperate wants of Jason and Tim getting along. The soft comments Bruce made about how well Tim and Jason could work together in a hypothetical always held an unspoken meaning. It wasn’t actually about Tim working with Jason on the field. It was about the fantasy of them being in Bruce’s bed at the same time, loving each other the way they loved him.
That would happen over Tim’s cold, dead body.
“I know,” Bruce said quietly. He reached out for Tim, then seeing the look in Tim’s eye, seemed to think against it and pulled his hand back. It only made Tim angrier. Angry Bruce didn’t currently trust Tim to give him affection. Angry Bruce was right not to trust him. So goddamn angry that despite craving comfort, all Tim wanted to do was bite the hand that fed him. A frustrated growl came out of Tim’s throat and he kicked the ground.
“You know,” Jason drawled, studying Tim with his barely contained madness, “I’m glad for it, honestly. I was starting to think you didn’t have any bite in you at all, Drake. Least we all know what it takes for you to finally snap.”
Tim opened his mouth for a biting insult, but looked at Bruce. He took a deep breath. “I hope all this self-restraint you’re showing is a lesson you keep when all this is over. The last thing we need is for you to go on another murder rampage because someone hurt your feelings.”
Jason’s eyes flared. His hands curled into fists. “Oh, you have no idea the self-restraint I show. If you want to see on a real rampage I’ll fucking-”
“Enough!” Bruce slammed a hand on the console. He ran his hand over his face and sighed. “I have more files on fear toxin in my study I need to find.” Bruce looked between them, giving them both a hard stare. “Can you two manage not to tear each other apart while I’m gone?”
“Ask him,” Jason shrugged. He was trying to sound nonchalant again, but he spoke through grit teeth. “I’m just fine over here.”
Tim just held up his cuffed hands, showing where the chain ended, keeping him firmly connected to the steel chair. “I couldn’t go anywhere even if I wanted to.”
Bruce nodded. He passed one more look between the two of them. “I’ll be right back. We’ll figure this out, I promise.” Again, he looked like he wanted to reach out. To which of them, Tim wasn’t sure. probably both, which sent an involuntary wave of disgust through his body. If Bruce touched Jason in front of him, Tim was probably going to puke. Bruce turned on his heel and walked out of the cave. They both watched his figure slowly disappear from view.
Before Tim could even turn to Jason and say something, he was tackled to the ground by a blindingly fast and heavy human body.
“What the-” Tim started, raising his hands to protect his face when a fist tried to come down on it. “How the fuck-”
Jason was wearing a grin that had gone completely mad, in every definition of the word. He had easily pinned Tim to the ground, a knee on Tim’s chest. Jason’s hands were still cuffed together but somehow, he’d undone the chain connecting him to his chair. Which boded particularly poorly for Tim, who was still chained to his chair, giving his arms a limited range of movement to defend himself.
Of course, Jason had picked the lock without either of them noticing.
“Thought you were the smart one, Drake,” Jason sneered. His hands were forced together, so when he reached for his waist with one hand they both had to move away from Tim’s face. “You really fucking thought I’d willingly hand over all my weapons to Bruce in a room with you?” He pulled a small, switchblade out from under his waistband and flipped it open. “I wouldn’t have even if I wasn’t drugged.”
“I knew you were acting, you fucking bastard,” Tim snarled. He didn’t have a weapon. It had been his suggestion to hand all of them over to Bruce because Tim was trying to be reasonable.
He should’ve fucking known better. There was never any reasoning with Jason.
Tim still had his bare hands. He launched them toward Jason’s throat. They managed to curl around flesh, nails just starting to dig in, when Jason stabbed Tim in the hand. Tim yelled, yanking his hand away and taking the other one with it.
That was the other shitty part of the anger. It made pain harder to ignore.
“Had to convince Bruce it was okay to leave you alone with me,” Jason said, shrugging slightly. “Figured I would only get one chance.” He raised the knife and tried to bring it down on Tim’s face. Tim managed to stop him, getting the knife tangled in the chains. “For fuck’s sake.” Jason shifted his weight. He pulled the knife free and brought up his over leg, using it to pin down the chain under his boot. Without any slack, Tim’s hands were forced against the ground, tugging uselessly.
“I will rip you apart with my teeth if I have to,” Tim growled, trying to snap at Jason’s face to prove his point.
Jason easily dodged and laughed. “I’d like to see you try. Maybe It’ll make you interesting, for once.” He brought the knife down and held it to Tim’s throat. “Grayson, I could’ve understood. He’s a pretty guy. Got a good sense of humor on him. Even Gordon. I don’t like her, but I could’ve respected it.” Jason’s face twisted into an ugly look, staring down at Tim with utter contempt. “But you? I have to share Bruce with you of all people? My goddamn replacement? That’s just fucking insulting.”
Maybe you shouldn’t have gotten yourself killed then,” Tim shot back. “You were easy to replace.”
“Yeah, provoke the guy with a knife to your throat,” Jason pressed the blade against Tim’s skin until a drop of blood was sliding down his adam’s apple. “I’ll show you what a dead Robin looks like.”
Tim raised an eyebrow. “You really think Bruce will forgive you for killing me?” He tugged at the chain as hard as he could. It still wasn’t budging. “He’d tear you apart.”
“Yeah, I really do,” Jason mocked Tim. He leaned in close enough for Tim to smell mint on Jason’s breath. “He always does. He’ll just blame it on the toxin. We both know he always forgives me no matter what I do.” His grin was a ghastly thing. “Can you say the same, Drake?”
Tim just growled. He headbutted Jason, not caring about the knife. If he was going to die, he would at least leave his mark.
Jason jerked back, rubbing his nose. Tim had hopefully broken it. Blood was already starting to pour down Jason’s face. Jason had the audacity to laugh. “Cute.” He rubbed his nose for a moment, feeling the bone. “You know I’m not going to kill you, though. That would be way too nice.”
“Nice?” Tim scoffed. “Did you finally learn the meaning of mercy, or something?”
“For you? Never.” Jason brought the knife to Tim’s face. “I just want to make you wish you were dead.” he dug the blade into Tim’s temple and Tim yelled, feeling it cut through his skin all the way down to his jaw. “What part of you do I have to mutilate to make Bruce stop loving you?”
Tim didn’t say anything. He was too busy trying to blink through the pain of a shallow cut that should’ve felt like nothing. Instead, it felt like a hot iron had branded the entire left side of Tim’s face, melting most of his skin off.
“What’s so pretty it could make Bruce like someone as pathetic as you?” Jason pressed on. He put another cut across Tim’s face, slashing through his cheek. “You’ve got a nice face. Is that it?” He leaned back so he could rip Tim’s shirt apart, exposing Tim’s chest. “We both know Bruce is a physical guy. Maybe it’s something else.” The blade trailed across Tim’s chest, looking for the next place to cut.
Tim managed to get leverage against the concrete with his feet. He pushed himself up as hard and fast as he could, throwing Jason off of him. Before Jason had the chance to recover, Tim launched himself forward and wrapped the chain around Jason’s throat.
“Maybe his love for you is only skin deep,” Tim pulled the chain as tight as it could go, watching Jason’s face turn red without oxygen. The rational part of him knew he was taking too much pleasure in watching Jason struggle for air. The rest of him didn’t care. “But Bruce actually loves me.”
Jason snarled. “He’s loved me longer.”
He wildly stabbed at Tim until the knife sank into Tim’s forearm. Tim screamed and let go, giving Jason slack to breathe, getting a hand under the chain and yanking hard on it. Tim didn’t fall off of Jason but instead fell into him. Their bodies were pressed together, and Jason used it as an excuse to wrap the chain around Tim, forcing them against each other.
“Can’t get away from me now,” Jason whispered into Tim’s ear. He ripped his knife out of Tim’s arm.
“You really want to be this close to me?” Tim asked. He tried to headbutt Jason again but didn’t have enough damned room to move. “Your fucking funeral.”
“I’m the one with the knife,” Jason said in a sing-song voice. He wiggled his arms between them and brought the knife against Tim’s crotch. Tim had his pants as a layer of fabric protecting him, but he still went rigid. “Is it here? Is this what Bruce likes so much? Go on. Tell me how he likes to fuck you, Drake. Bet you’re real fucking vanilla about it and he has to be all nice to you.”
“You sound jealous,” Tim tried to bite Jason, who kept pulling his head away. “You’re the one who needs to hear him say he’s proud of you just to come. I’m not the one of us who cries during sex.”
“How the hell-” Jason’s whole body jerked in anger.
Tim knew his grin was feral. “Trust me, I know all the embarrassing details. Bruce talks about it all the time.” That wasn’t entirely true. Tim had just overheard it once when Bruce forgot to turn off his comms. But the lie was far more embarrassing for Jason.
“I could make you cry,” Jason sounded angrier than Tim had ever heard him, which was a hell of a feat. “He’s just not fucking you hard enough. Putting you in your goddamn place like you deserve.”
“You want to fuck me, now?” Tim taunted. “I thought you hated me.”
“Too vanilla to know what hatefucking is, Drake?” Jason shot back. He pressed the knife harder into Tim’s crotch. “I could make you fucking beg for it.”
“Like hell.”
“You wanna find out?” Jason asked.
Tim paused his struggles. He pulled back and gave Jason an incredulous look. “You’re not actually serious.”
“Either I kill you, torture you, or bitch you.” Jason shrugged. He dug the knife down enough to cut open Tim’s pants. The fabric tore loudly. “I’ll let you pick.”
“I’ll kill you first,” Tim shot back. He refused to take the offer seriously.
He didn’t know what his answer would be, if it was a serious offer, so it was better for Tim to not think about it entirely.
“Scared you’ll like it?” Jason was just mocking him now. “If I ruin you enough, you’ll come crawling back for me instead of Bruce. And besides,” Jason lowered his voice to a purr, “we both know he’d pay to watch. Bet he’d even help me hold you down.”
Against his will, Tim shuddered. His anger was clouding his judgment, making it hard to figure out what other emotions were there. Maybe there was arousal. Maybe it was fear.
Tim always had trouble telling the difference.
“Have you always wanted to fuck me?” Tim avoided everything Jason was saying. It made him too dizzy to think about.
Jason just gave him a shrug. “Can’t say I haven’t wondered what’s so special about fucking you that he keeps doing it. Is your ass really that good or something?”
Tim snorted. He had no idea Jason didn’t know. “He doesn’t fuck me in the ass.”
“What?” Jason’s brow furrowed.
“If I had a dick down there, you’d have cut it by now,” Tim pointed out, looking down at the knife.
Jason frowned. He dug the knife deeper, ripping open a bigger hole in the fabric of Tim’s pants until he could force his hand inside, thankfully the one that wasn’t holding the knife. Tim tried to kick, but he couldn’t stop Jason’s hand from groping until it found his cunt, pressing against Tim’s underwear.
“Son of a bitch,” Jason said. “Well, that makes you even easier to fuck. Now I don’t need prep.”
“You’re not fucking me,” Tim snarled, trying to get away from Jason’s hand. his skin was too hot, to have Jason that close to his most sensitive areas. He didn’t want to know what his body would do if Jason got past the thin barrier of fabric between him and Tim’s skin.
“You haven’t actually told me no yet,” Jason pointed out. He managed to cut apart Tim’s underwear, a cold reminder of how close the knife was to his cunt. Thick fingers pressed against Tim’s hole until two managed to sink in. “You’re wet.”
“No, I’m not,” Tim gasped, even though he could feel it. The easy slide of Jason’s fingers inside of him, the way there was no resistance from his body. He still wasn’t ready to admit to himself that he wanted this. Not when he wanted Jason dead just as badly. Tim opened his mouth to say something more, but Jason brushed a thumb over his clit. “Oh god.”
“if I’m being honest with you,” Jason hummed, starting to move his fingers inside of Tim, “I think it’s a lot easier to be horny than angry right now. That’s the only damn feeling that works to fight this.”
He was right and Tim hated him for it. The anger thrumming under his skin pulled back, just slightly, to make room for arousal. It made Tim want to give in, just so he could have anything to latch onto besides cold, empty fury.
And Jason’s fingers felt good inside of him. They arched right up into Tim’s sweet spot, making him gasp and jerk.
“How quick do you think I can make you come?” Jason asked. He worked his fingers and thumb together, finding a good pace. Like he knew exactly how Tim liked it.
“Fuck you,” Tim groaned, throwing his head back.
“Tell me to stop and I will,” Jason said.
They both knew he wouldn’t. Tim didn’t want Jason to stop. If Jason stopped, Tim would probably grab the knife and gut him.
“I hate you.” Tim’s hips were moving against his will. He was acutely aware the knife was still down there too, but he put a small amount of trust in Jason to not let it trust.
“It’s mutual,” Jason agreed. He shifted his hips until they were pressed against Tim’s thigh. He was hard. Tim could feel the outline of Jason’s cock as Jason started to rut, grinding against Tim for friction. A low moan came out of him, going straight to Tim’s core.
Jason was kind of handsome, at least. Especially with blood all over his face.
“Now are you gonna come for me or what?” Jason growled into Tim’s ear. “Show me exactly how much you hate me, Drake. I want to fucking feel it.”
“You’re a bastard who doesn’t deserve Bruce,” Tim whined as Jason’s fingers worked him. Rubbing his clit and thrusting into his sweet spot. It was a sweet, torturous distraction from his rage, but it still didn’t make the feeling quite go away.
“Agreed.” Jason shrugged, seeming unbothered by the statement. He groaned again, pressing his forehead against Tim’s. “I’m still better than you, though. You’re the little bitch who’s never going to forget what being fucked by me feels like. Maybe I’ll be nice enough that you’ll enjoy it and jerk off to it every time you’re wet.”
The thought of jerking off to Jason repulsed Tim. Yet it was the same thought that sent his orgasm through him, like a shock to his core. He yelled, so loud it echoed through the cave. His hole clenched around Jason’s fingers as his body worked through the spasms of pleasure.
For one glorious moment, Tim didn’t notice his anger. He just had the beautiful crescendo of pleasure crashing down on him, making his body sing.
“Isn’t that fucking adorable,” Jason gasped, grinding harder against Tim. You’re finally not annoying for once. No wonder Bruce fucks you. It’s the only way someone can enjoy being around you.”
The words were mean and Tim wanted to snap back, but he was boneless. Every insult from Jason was a new aftershock of pleasure down Tim’s spine.
Tim opened his mouth to find something to say, but he was cut off.
“What the hell are you doing?” Bruce stood at the mouth of the cave, staring at them with wide eyes. He looked just as angry as Tim felt, stalking over to where they were pinned and bloody on the floor. “Jason if you hurt him-”
“I’m fingering him, actually,” Jason corrected lazily, still grinding his hips.
Bruce stopped walking. “What?”
Jason thrust his fingers inside Tim to make his point, pulling a cry out of Tim. He was oversensitive from his orgasm and couldn’t get away from the pressure against his g-spot. “You should be proud of us. We’re getting along pretty well.”
Sure they were. Like Tim’s face wasn’t cut up and Jason’s nose wasn’t broken.
“You…” Bruce trailed off, breath caught in his throat. Tim watched his pupils dilate.
“He’s enjoying himself. Just came on my fingers,” Jason said. He pressed the knife against Tim’s thigh as a warning. “Right, Drake?”
Tim bit back a remark. He nodded.
“I promise to behave if you let me fuck him,” Jason looked up at Bruce. He was definitely lying. “We should both fuck him. See how much he can take. I’ll even keep the cuffs on just to be nice.”
Tim couldn’t stop the soft moan that came out of him at the thought.
Bruce looked between them. His eyes settled on Tim. “Are you-”
“Yes,” Tim said. “Please?”
As soon as Tim said the magic word, Bruce was by their side, taking his clothes off. Jason groaned in victory. He grinned against Tim’s cheek. “Now we can have some real fun.”
#necrotic writings#ask game#whump#dead dove do not eat#jaytim#brujay#brutim#brujaytim#batcest#i wrote this in like. two hours it's *not* polished#i'm really stressing how unedited it is#but i wanted to post it before i started unpacking and all#so i hope it's still of some kind of quality.#did really enjoy this one won't like#i love mean hatefucking#characterization is a little iffy but like. the whole point is they're hopped up on anger so#i feel it's permissable.#i wanna write the proper smut scene but. idk if i'll get to it.#know i'm gonna think about it tho.#hopefully i can get to some other asks today#depends how busy i am
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WIFI IS MINE ONCE AGAIN as i sit on a mattress on the floor
#it feels like ive been without it for so long...#it has been... three and a half days... i am Weak....#nah jk i wouldve been find without it for much longer#but boy howdy am i Glad to be able to use my dear beloved laptop again#i am In The New Place i am Beginning To Settle#tomorrow i begin unpacking my own stuff!!! exciting!!!#i cant wait to admire all of my Things!#ohhhh and i finally have a spot on the wall for my combo whiteboard/corkboard....#im still very stressed and i want to lay in a hole but!!#i am doing slightly better than a few days ago!#the weather has been nice... cool and rainy... i am not used to cool and rainy#its also cold and i am - unfortunately - a desert creature#suffice to say i am wearing hand warmers a hoodie and a blanket#absolutely unprompted#the place's last owner Didnt Fucking Clean though#so there have been many spiders. and cobwebs. and general Grime we will have to scrub#like seriously today i was dusting the ceiling. THE CEILING.#had to dust & vacuum the windowsills... gonna scrub my bathroom tomorrow...#theres a large tear in my bedroom carpet too...#ugh and the cabinets are Small so organizing all the spices and shit has been Rancid#stuff has to go out of place and you cant see it all and MY ORGANIZATIONAL SYSTEMS ARE CRUMBLING#sometimes it feels like my adhd and autism are fistfighting but during a move?#lockstep babeyyyy. they are Streamlined. lots of things and lots of sorting & placing and eeheehee#i have also killed most of the freakishly huge mosquitos in the house so! things are better!#that first night was Rough! its better now! this shell is becoming a House!
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I moved into a new place about 3 weeks ago and I finally finished setting up my new desk space.
#excited to relax and play some games#haven’t done any type of gaming in a little over a month due to the stress on packing and unpacking#I’m the type of person who can’t relax until everything is in its rightful place#gonna try out the new horse pack this weekend#hopefully#nonsims#desk setup
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Sanji snapping at his dearest most beloved Nami-swan just because they don't know where Usopp is and he's worried sick makes my mind go to places I didn't know it could
#it's like 2 am so i'll make a more detailed post about the movie tomorrow but#sanji in this movie fucking killed me in so many ways and there's so much to unpack#like obviously i wanna talk about luffy and the usonami fight (BECAUSE THAT HURT MORE THAN ANYTHING TBH) but#but sanji is my sweetie pie so i'm gonna make it about him first#i know they are all extremely nervous and stressed and angry bc it's exactly what baron wants but you know.....#sanji saying it's luffy's fault that they're there and kind of yelling at nami to then proceed to get back usopp's hat?? i am going to die#ughh i love this movie so much so much so much i am going to obsess over this for days#one piece#black leg sanji#nami#usopp#sanuso#baron omatsuri and the secret island
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Why am I sobbing, everything he does feels like he is baring his soul to us, and now I just want to take care of him and take away his worries 🥺
#love and deepspace#love and deepspace zayne#i finally got around to reading this and hiding from spoilers#juggling moving back into a house renovated from a house fire 1.5 years ago and cleaning and unpacking and working overtime#have been stressful af#but i was saving zayne's memory until i got my room all nice and cozy again to enjoy it#and now i just want to give him all the love he deserves#🥺🥺🥺
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Tangled The Series would have been very different if Varian were voiced by John Mulaney, huh?
#“You want it? Go get it” *chucks the scroll into a gutter*#“ I told you I’m worried about Corona too you know like a liar”#*almost gets murdered by Andrew twice* “now we don’t have time to unpack all of that”#“Varian why didn’t you do anything when the Saporians took over?!?” “I was over on the bench”#“Is Frederic a good king?” “Whose to say”#*sees Quirin in amber in a red rock induced hallucination* NOO THATS THE THING IM SENSITIVE ABOUT#“Because this is Old Corona and life is a fucking nightmare”#“No offense Varian” “NAWT FUNNAEY”#“I am very small and have no money so you can imagine the kind of stress I am under”#*sees an automaton* “I smell a robot- prove prove”#*gets his fathers acceptance and pride* “THIS IS THE HEIGHT OF LUXURY”#@Andrew “beat it bozo”#Raps fights back against him using the rocks “YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY”#@the fear rocks “everything else is so goddamn weird this might as well happen”#Varian making that bottle rocket that explodes eggs#@Cass during Nothing Left To Lose “you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair”#“Eat ass suck a dick and sell drugs”#tts#tangled the series#rapunzel's tangled adventure#varian
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Finally got around to reading and catching up on the Skybound 2023 comic.
I was not prepared.
#there is so much to unpack and I was not emotionally ready for 99% of everyone to die#i was also not prepared for the lore implications#or the newfound character depth#yeah this will Lead To New Fics#transformers#soundwave is a newfound beloved#starscream is a piece of garbage murderhobo and honestly it suites him#optimus is so well put together in the comic like dang he's perfect#ratchet is forever tired and stressed and thats about right#arcee has DEPTH#Magnus is dead???#Bee died in literally the first volume so go off I guess comic#the writers aren't playing games and I respect that
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🗑️ - "It's complicated"
💍 - Partners (current or future)
💢 - Person they can't stand
🏆 - Best friends (past, current or future)
For Corey? :]
I just realized I forgot to post this answer 💀
Sorry about that lmao
Thanks for the ask! I promise its appreciated even if my response was belated
🗑- It's complicated
Ortega! Surprise to nobody that Corey is allergic to commitment. They love (theyd hate the use of that word but its accurate) Ortega but between their trauma and wanting to keep distance to protect them Corey just refuses to label what is obviously a years-long exclusive relationship.
💍- Partners
Also Ortega. Eventually Corey's gonna defrost enough to settle down and be domestic. Ortega breaking them out did wonders to accelerate the process.
💢- Person they can't stand
Chen. They didnt get along very well pre-heartbreak. Started to play nice during rebirth and retri, and then Chen revealed that he knew about them and saw their autopsy photos and did nothing about it. Now Corey wants a dartboard with his face on it.
Bonus extra background character. Corey still doesnt like Owl. They really hold a grudge.
🏆- Best friends
Current: Dr. Mortum and Rosie. Pay no attention to the fact you spend 99% of your bonding time with them through the puppet. Totally not a disaster waiting to happen.
Past: Anathema. They left an unfillable void in Corey's social life. Once they stop dissociating enough to realize how much they miss Themmy its gonna be disasterous
#its been a long few weeks#finally settling into a routine with work and stuff#i think im fully unpacked at my new place now too#i am. SO tired#gonna try to un-ghost everybody now that im less overwhelmed#me 🤝 corey: self isolating when stressed#bad habit. sorry yall#oc lore#corey rook#sidestep#fallen hero
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Lol. Lol. Lol.
#this is why i didnt want to move home 😂😂😂😂😂😂 being expected to cook and do the kitchen things#and not a single person cleaning in this house except for mom!!! = also me because i cant let my mother do all the work#anyway im tired lol!!!!! and i want to live with my 2 friends in the city#and meal prep together have my own space and not be subjected to more You should exercise comments#this is weight gained from depressive stress eating mom :-) i am Stressed and im trying not to cope this way but it is a process#anyway i miss my dorm i miss seeing 40+ people at meals i miss having the privacy to sing my heart out#i miss living in a small and manageable space i miss my FRIENDS i miss that boy (this is not a positive thing to miss admittedly)#i miss living right by the coffee shop that sells the Best Sandwich Ever and a honking good lavender vanilla latte#i also miss being able to fit into my favourite jeans. this is a self inflicted issue and it annoys me#anyway i am medium miserable and there is still a HECK TON of things to do#like unpack and go to the grocery store because its my father's birthday and ive committed#to cooking birthday dinner because birthday lunch was an unfortunate flop#o yeah also i miss having access to cheap obscenely strong black tea. that kept me going through finals#im only here a month before im off to my summer job which will be Away from here!! but darn it all its going to be a Month
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Also it is patentedly incorrect to write a character as a morally cogent and politically literate feminist and have her blame her boyfriend for getting literally unambiguously raped without narratively unpacking it. I think there's room for Annie to feel betrayed or even for her to fuck up in the way she did in the show (by treating this as an infidelity) and for hughie to respond as tho he has something to apologize for (although its clearly not his fault) because ppl are allowed to be hypocritical in their politics, misinformed, blindspots, momentarily blinded by stress etc but only if the framing recognizes the reality that hughie was raped and should be treated with that in mind from a narrative perspective. He's clearly traumatized by it. It's rlly goddamn obviously not even a little bit his fault. It would have been very interesting for Annie to respond this way with the narrative understanding that she is essentially victimblaming but instead it's not intentional just another character writing fuckup. Kripke learn how to write about gender challenge.
#rape mention#tw rape mention#the boys#like annie is a good person but she was raised evangelical on what is essentially a beauty pagent circuit and shes still unpacking that#reasonably in character for her to have picked up some toxic gender role mindset about this sort of thing#shes also been thru a lot so it also makes sense for her to respond this way just on the basis of stress#either way this is undeniably a fuck up on her part but the narrative doesnt know that cus kripke has a binary approach to sex crime#cus hes sort of an idiot re: writing gender stuff#like hes trying but like he is dumb about this#at least last time annie took this shit seriously!!!
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it’s quiet in my head
#first time on adhd meds#i didn’t realise the extent of my self produced background brain noise#it’s all quiet#is this the default???? is this how it’s supposed to be???? it’s wild#never in my life has my head been quiet#i think i’m having a nice calm afternoon#i’m not plagued by thoughts#i know they’re there but i can put them on the shelf for later#they’re not causing constant stress and pressure and guilt they’re just *there*#i unpacked the dishwasher with no external pressure of dirty dishes piling up on the counter#and i now have coffee and pumpkin bread#it’s so fucking quiet#I’m actually getting teary eyed oh my god#it’s so nice#adhd#actually adhd#adhd brain#adhd things#adhd meds#adult adhd#diagnosed at 26#neurodiversity#neurodivergent#neurospicy#mine
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i wanna live on my own again …. i’m so ready to put my books on a shelf and my clothes in a closet
#absolutely adore my parents but i’m just excited to Have My Own Place again. where i can unpack all my shit & decorate & stay for a year#and be back downtown tbh. the suburbs are very quiet & it’s peaceful but i feel so lonely out here#i’m gonna have to wait til october for prices to drop a bit but i’m determined to make it work#i got a dope job as a neurofeedback technician but it’s only 9-15h/week ($22cad/h) soooo that ain’t gonna cut it#little nervous cuz frankly i dunno if i can handle working more than ~30h/week rn & also. holy fuck it’s hard finding decent part-time jobs#although! last night my old manager asked if i’d consider coming back to the restaurant to host/do cash on a casual basis/for the holidays#which means i’m probably going to end up balancing 3 jobs again. which is kinda fucked up lol but it’s good money so i can’t turn it down#anyways i’m getting ahead of myself#i do feel like i’m genuinely looking forward to things for the first time in a while though#like grad school next year & tattoos this fall & hopefully making friends w new coworkers n shit. even if it’s unbelievably stressful 👍#pegasus speaks#hi btw i am alive. i just haven’t really been very interested in tumblr at all lately. which is kinda weird but probably for the best
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