#and this things is now so much bigger than I thought

[patchworkideas]

I have a folder named 'Story Ideas' in my home system, for easy access.

In there, I have a folder for each fandom that I write in.

If a Wip stays a one shot or only an idea post it stays in the general fandom folder it belongs to - with AUs and Crossovers in the fandom that uses the characters or has the biggest influence.

If it grows it becomes it's own folder. If I already know the future name at that point it will be named that, otherwise it gets a descriptor that stays even after it has a name. (example: My 'Coming Forth By Day' Story is still in a folder called Subnautica AU in the Yu-Gi-Oh Folder.)

The chapters are neatly named 'Chapter 1' or 'Chapter 1-6' etc, depending on how frantically I was writing. If it got written in one file it stays in one file. (This became more common since I started dictating, where i need to check for dictation errors before I can close a file (to listen to my own voice to check) and often new ideas are howling to be given voice before the check for the prior one is finished.)

Most bigger stories with their own folder also get a subfolder called notes.

That's the danger folder, where the wild things go and nothing is safe or certain. I have doubles, often actually writen or rewritten notes, sometimes removed scenes or whole removed chapters. Notes in order and notes very much not, in whatever order they came to me or I thought they fit best.

The notes folder is the depth of my mind and very often contains a multitude more words than actual make it into the story. (Long Way Around is an extreme example - by the time I had 10k posted, I hit over 100k in notes for everything still to come. Something that has been invaluable for me as I continued writing it these past years. It's been slow going but it's allowed me to keep the plot for these last 3 chapters i still have to write after almost 4 years now. Though there's a lot more to edit and polish before we get close to posting those even once they're finally written, since I hiatused to ensure I don't drop one of the myriads of threads I'm weaving together in the critical third act.)

I love writing, and I lost so much in the chaos of not having it organized in the past. So now it is.

.... Don't look on my PC where I do most of my drafting via dictation though. There's a folder called 'transferred to phone' for everything I already copied over to my phone. My phone has fandom folders but no notes, big stories are only told apart by name + chapter number. I then send the draft from my phone via different email addresses to my tablet, where all the notes and edits etc happen. *That* is where I'm organized in the above fashion.

... There and in a dedicated backup drive where I copy my tablet files to - admittedly not as often as I should. But even if I lose edits someday I at least know that I'll never lose the original draft.

Which makes it much easier to edit without abandon since the original never lost if I fuck something up beyond recognition during editing. Or in case of technical issues, obviously.

Backups are important, doubly so for anything creative.

... And I still manage to lose track of small ideas because each fandom folder usually has a shit ton of those small idea files that never become a full blown story.

And I still very much enjoy reading through those occasionally and enjoying the diamonds in the rough, those I forgot and those I didn't.

I love writing, and I love my stories. <3

Edit: And now, after actually checking, since I didn't want to risk tumblr eating my post, I realize that for some unfathomable reason I forgot to set up the fandom folder system that I have literally been using for over a decade on my tablet - probably because I figured 'I love this new fandom! I'm going to write for nothing else ever again!' when I did it. *sigh* It always feels like that, it never is X-D

So the majority of everything has the fandom name in the title, aka 'Subnautica Yu-Gi-Oh'. The handful that don't I'll need to rename at some point and finally sort everything into folders as it should have been...

And what was i thinking when i wrote my game fandom stories in the gaming folder - which does have the 'fandom/game name' folder system at least! And I usually do back those up too, since my game notes are also fun (and just as long, looking at my +100k Oxygen Not Included notes...). And I suppose some of these are stories to help me remember what happened last...

But they're still stories, and I wonder if I'll remember to check for stories in 'Games' someday 🤔

Sigh. I have a very specific order in my head. It doesn't always make it onto the page. Kinda like in writing. But it's otherwise still as described above and I'm very proud of it.

only sort of related to the wip meme that's going around, i'm curious, now: how do you, personally, organise your wips?

this does not feel like a poll kind of situation—it's a 'just reply or reblog and add to the body of the post' kind of deal. please feel free; i'm genuinely curious.

[venusalexian]

solet • let me do this for you

part 1

barça femení x teen!reader, alexia putellas x teen!reader

in which you finally let someone in, and Alexia accepts that she’ll be having a bigger role in your life than she first expected

Ale had driven you to the grounds this morning, as she tends to do now if she has a free day when you have a game. You were so excited for this game. Your grandpa had recuperated well from his surgery, even if he now needed some extra care, and Ale’s presence in your life had become a constant. You couldn’t believe this was your life now.

You went into the game eager to win, to score, to lead. By half time, you had scored once and provided an assist. You were on fire, but everything changed when you stepped into the tunnel and Ale was waiting for you, a worried frown in her face.

“Solet, I need you to stay calm while I tell you this, okay?.” She said. “Your neighbor called, they’ve had to take your grandma into the hospital because she fainted. They firmly believe she’s going to be okay. I will drive you to the hospital right now if that’s what you want.” You can’t believe she’s even doubting it. There is no way you’re making it back out into the pitch now.

“Please Ale, let’s go.” You rush to the locker room to get your things and run all the way to Ale’s car, impatient.

“It’s all gonna be okay, I promise.” Ale says as she lays her free hand on your arm, the other on the steering wheel.

You really want to believe her, but you don’t really think she has the ability to fulfill this one. You don’t respond. You just lay your head against the window and let its coldness ground you to reality.

As soon as you get to the waiting room you make a beeline for your grandfather, who sits in a corner. He’s recuperated from his surgery, but he still can’t stand for long periods of time and needs help remembering to take his meds.  You break down as soon as you’re in his arms.

”Oh, mi niña, everything’s gonna be okay. She was awake when they got her into the ambulance. It was just a big scare, but she’s going to be okay.”

You nod against his chest but don’t detach from his hold. You won’t believe it until you see her with your own eyes and doctors confirm it, but you appreciate the comfort of his words. You turn a bit to look to your left. Ale is talking with your neighbor. She has her capitana face on. That relaxes you further.

You hate how unhelpful you’re being. You should be more composed, asking questions, making sure your grandpa is also okay, planning for any contingencies that might come from this incident. But you can only cling, and cry, like a child. So you’re happy to see that Ale has taken control of the situation, because at least somebody has. You’ve been trusting her with more of yourself and your life over the past months, and you’re so, so glad about it now. She looks over at you, and you know she understands what it means to you. The guilt of your impotence stays, but the pressure eases and you let yourself just fall.

Alexia is looking at you and seeing a kid. A strong, resilient kid. But a kid. So she takes charge, and she accepts that caring for you is coming more naturally to her every day. And as she waits with you for news about your grandma, she gradually also accepts the role she wants to play in your life. More than she’d let herself in the past, more than she’s ever said out loud.

“So… Why are the kids talking about you adopting another kid?” Marta approached Alexia with a massive smirk at the end of training.

“Yeah Ale, I thought you’d at least talk to me before you got a kid outside of this team.” Oh, Irene was having too much fun with this conversation.

“First of all, there is no another, I don’t have any kids, period.” A chorus of ‘hey’ and ‘rude’ was heard from the other side of the room, most notably (and loudest) by Vicky and Jana. Alexia just rolled her eyes. Apparently, the whole team was a part of the conversation now. “And secondly, I have not adopted a kid. I’m just… mentoring.”

“Mentoring? Is that what they call it now? Mentoring is driving a kid to and from practice?” Jana continued teasing her.

Alexia had gotten into the habit of driving you when she could especially to and from late night practices, thinking that it was much too late for you to be out taking public transportation.

“Or staying to watch those practices?” followed Sydney, who’s joking character was coming more and more out as she became more comfortable with the first team.

Now, Alexia knew how to perfectly justify this one.

“I am captain of this team, I have a duty to check in with the B team and source for talent.” she answered, feeling smug.

“Oh, and is having Sunday lunch with her and her family a form of recruitment?” added Vicky, who had become closer with the teen and had taken to chatting with her on occasion.

Alexia actually didn’t know how to respond to this one. She had taken your grandmother’s invitation a couple of time when you had Sunday morning games and she had a free weekend. She loved getting to know you more by spending time with you and your grandparents. And although she thought you pressured yourself too much, she saw herself reflected in your protectiveness, diligence and sense of responsibility toward your family and team.

“Better yet. Why did your girlfriend text me asking if I could give her more information about the kid because she wants to make a good impression when you bring her over for Sunday dinner at your mom’s this weekend?” added Ingrid.

Alexia muttered “traitor” as the locking room erupted in chaos. Everyone knows how much it means for their protective and family-oriented captain to introduce people to her family.

“Okay, enough. I care about her, yes. And she doesn’t have too many people on her corner, so I decided to become one.”

Everyone softened at that, understanding the importance and vulnerability of the statement.

“Now, no more social chit-chat about my life or you’re all running three times as much before practice.”

The soft expressions were replaced with groans, complaints and the occasional soft object thrown at her. Oh how she loves her fútbol family.

Your neighbor has had to leave; she has her own family to care for. So it’s just you, your grandpa, and Ale. Each sitting on a seat to your side. The doctor comes out after a half hour of waiting. The good news is that she’s okay, she’s awake, and there is nothing life-threatening. It feels like a toll has been lifted off your shoulders. But then he continues: it was a big fall, a symptom of an underlying heart condition. It means more medication and the possibility for this to happen again or other bad things. You feel dizzy again. You only hear bits and pieces of the rest: needs more monitorization, will need more constant care for a couple of weeks, she’s gonna stay overnight, you’ll be able to see her soon. You cling to the last part to stay in touch with reality.

Ale sees you drowning, so she asks, “Do you trust me to help, to take over now and help you through this? Let me do this for you?”

You nod. You need her to. You don’t even have any space in your worrying to overthink what this means or why she’s willing to do all this for you. You need her now, and the rest will come when everything’s more calm.

“I’m gonna make a few calls, okay? Can I tell a couple of people what is going on? The girls, mami and Olga are all worried. I won’t say much, just a quick update, okay?”

You nod again. You haven’t uttered a word since you got into Ale’s car. You can’t. So when she nods back, you hide your face in your grandpa’s chest again. You try to distract yourself with happier memories until you can see your grandma again. Thinking of her still hurts, so you focus on your team, your friends, and the people in Ale’s life you’ve met in the past weeks.

You felt dizzy from anticipation. You kept bouncing your leg in the passenger seat, and checking your outfit on the rear-view mirror. Ale noticed your fidgeting and laid her free hand on your shoulder.

“Are you nervous?” her eyes didn’t stray from the road but you noticed her half-grimace. Ale is not the best at not asking obvious questions, but you know it’s because she doesn’t know how to start the conversation otherwise.

“Yeah, I just…” you also grimaced, feeling like a little kid. “I want them to like me.” you mumbled, embarrassed.

“Oh, solet. They will. Mami is a natural caretaker, she’ll take you under her wing immediately. And Alba and Olga will just love having one more person to team up with against me.” Ale rolled her eyes, fondly.

She exudes a different type of softness when she talks about the women in her life, even when she fakes being annoyed at their antics. Her response calmed you, though.

Ale was absolutely right, of course.

As soon as you entered Ale’s home, her mom was giving you a massive hug and when she pulled away, she told you how beautiful you are and that she was really excited to meet you. You were blushing again. She hugged her daughter next, and then motioned for you both to go to the living room while she finished cooking. You offered to help, and you were rewarded with a wide smile and a pinch to your cheek. Ale got a quip that “she ought to keep her instead of her daughters if she keeps this helpfulness up”.

You’re still flushed when you reached the living room with Ale to find her sister and girlfriend sitting at the table in conversation. They stood up when you entered the room. Her sister moved to you, hugged you and introduced herself. You opened your mouth to do the same but she interrupted before you could utter a word.

“Oh, I know who you are. Ale won’t shut up about you.” You both turned to her, but she was too busy kissing her girlfriend to notice. Alba covered your eyes and shouted. “Women, not in front of the kid!”

You smiled as Alba moved away her hand and smiled back at you, all nerves forgotten by now, replaced by warmth. Ale and Olga were walking towards you both now, Ale’s hand on the small of her back. Olga hugged you, and her smile was just as warm and soft as Ale’s. 

“Yeah, Ale hasn’t shut up about you. We’re all really excited to meet her mini-me.” And there you were, blushing again. Had Ale really referred to you like that? Before you could ask, Ale’s mom called the four of you to finishing setting up as dinner was ready.

Conversation during dinner flowed. Ale was right, you had nothing to worry about and the night went perfectly. They all asked about you, eager to get to know you better. Alba and Olga did use your presence to rile Ale up. They shared embarrassing stories as she blushed and covered her face.

“I’ll lose my tough captain facade, stop.”

“You never had one to begin with, Ale”

By the time dinner ends, you couldn’t even believe you had been so nervous to meet them. Ale and Olga offered to drive you home. As you and Olga waited for Ale to finalize some arrangement with her mom, she put her arm around you, as the night had unexpectedly cooled and neither of you had come dressed for it. You basked in the comfort of her warmth and touch.

“I’m so glad Ale brough you over.” You looked up to the older woman, her smile exactly like Ale’s. “She is right, you know? You’re such a solet. I’m so glad you have each other.” Before you could respond, Ale was ushering you both inside the car and the motion of the road and the fullness from dinner lulled you to sleep. You miss their smile at your sleeping form, and their unspoken understanding of their care for you.

By the time Alexia finishes texting and calling, she has a plan. Alexia does well with plans, likes to prepare for things. But she has to talk to your grandparents first, and she doesn’t know how that conversation is going to go. Alexia is also quick on her feet, though, and works with what’s given. Knows how to fight for what she thinks is right.

It doesn't take long for a nurse to come by and lead the three of you to your grandma’s room. You cry again when you see she’s okay. You can’t cling to her like you did with your grandpa, so you’re content to sit by her side and hold her hand while she asks questions about the game, and you do your best to respond to her. Your words are stilted, but Ale and your grandpa smile because it’s the most you’ve spoken in hours.

After some more assurances, your grandma convinces you to go down to the cafeteria with your grandpa to have dinner. You’re hesitant to comply, but both her and Ale reassure you and don’t accept no for an answer. You give them one last glance to reassure yourself everything is okay befor eyou leave the room.

Alexia is nervous to be left alone with your grandma. She needs to start the conversation she knows is coming and despite the encouragement from her family, she isn’t sure to be ready for it. She doesn’t have to be, though, because your grandma beats her to it.

“She needs you.” There’s a heavy silence that follows; Alexia doesn’t know how to respond.

“She needs you because she’s a kid but doesn’t accept it. We both know that this incident means that both I and my husband need more help than she should be burdened by. She’s stretched thin enough, she already does too much. We want her to have fun, be a kid, a student, a footballer. Not a nurse, or a caretaker. She can’t do that if she’s constantly worried about us. And I know you know all this.”

Alexia stands seriously and silently and measures her words before speaking. She knows what’s next, but this is not her family, she doesn’t want to overstep. But if directly asked for her input, she’ll do it. She’ll take care of everything. For you. 

“I do, yeah.”

“We need that kind of help but it can’t come from her. So will you help? I’ve seen you grow closer to her, she admires you so much, relishes your attention and care. If we ask you for it, if she agrees, are you ready for this?”

Alexia doesn’t hesitate.

“Yes.”

She can see the tension leave your grandma.

“Good. Now we can talk specifics. What’s your plan? Tell me and then we can tell her together.”

In the morning after you, Ale and your grandpa went home to sleep –Ale taking the couch even if you insisted on her taking the bed–, it’s Ale also who drives back to the hospital and brings your grandma home when she’s released. All four of you sit in the living room and when you try to fuss over your grandma, all three of them reassure you she’s okay.

“Mi vida, we have something to discuss.” Your grandma starts, and you squirm, uncomfortable at being out of loop.

“Alexia and us have a proposal for you, mi niña. We’ll do only what you want us to, but we think this is the best for all of us, and especially you.” You don’t respond to your grandpa, just nod, the anticipation driving you crazy. Your grandma takes over the conversation again.

“We love you so much, mi vida. We love how kind you are, how responsible, and how much you care for us. But your grandpa and I need more help, and we want you to not be burdened by it.” You’re about to protest –they’re not a burden, would never be, you love them and you’ll always care for them–but Ale stops you.

“Ssh, solet, listen to what we have to say first, okay?” You nod again instead of responding.

“So remember when I made a few calls yesterday at the hospital? I set up a couple of things. First, there is a home-care medical team that will be taking care of your grandparents from now on. They’re the best, but we still get to pick who’s going to be coming to stay with them for continued care. You’ll be part of that decision too.”

You exhale, thankful that Ale took over arranging this service. Deep down, you know that even if you would have tried your hardest, your grandparents need specialized care you wouldn’t be able to provide.

“And we also thought something else, but we’ll only do this if you want to and completely at your pace.” You become uneasy again at their own nervous expressions.

“Mi vida, we’ve thought that you spend so much time moving from here to the city, and it’s not benefitting you in your studies, or your football career, so Alexia kindly offered an arrangement that we think will work for all of us.”

“Solet, I’d like it if you moved in with me.” There is nothing but shock in your expression now. You have no idea how to respond, this being the last thing you expected from this conversation.

“We were thinking you could stay with me over the week, so you can go to a school that is more understanding of your football career, like many of your teammates, and be closer to the training grounds. You’ll come back to stay over weekends with your grandparents, so you’ll still see them a lot. And you can obvious tell me anytime you wanna be with them, and we’ll make it work so you never feel detached.”

You stop her nervous rambling with an obvious question, still in shock.

“You really want me to move in with you? Are you sure?”

Her smile is so, so soft again. Her eyes so kind, but also somewhat exasperated, she can’t believe you don’t understand how much she cares for you yet.

“Yes, solet. And before you ask. Yes, I’ve talked to Olga, she also thinks this is good. She’s in and out of the house these days because of work in Madrid so she thinks this is actually good for us both, apparently I don’t struck her as someone who lives well alone.” She rolls her eyes when she shares that part, but she’s still smiling.

“And, avis, you think this is best for all of us? Because I’ll still miss you a lot, but you’re right that I’ve been struggling these days.”–you finally admit–“And I guess if there’s a professional caring for you here and I can call you anytime and come often, then, I guess, it seems like a good solution to me too.”

All three of them smile widely at you, glad that you see the same things they do.

“Yes, mi niña, we do. And this is always your home, you can be here as much as you want to.”

“Okay” You say, and it feels definitive, the start of something.

—

an:

so here’s the second part of solet! it took me a bit longer than expected but I wanted to do a good job at setting everything up and it made it longer than i initially expected.

this is the end of setting up the arc, and stories from now on will be just instances of solet’s life :)

I already have some ideas drafted, but I’m super eager to get requests and asks about this world of what kind of things you’d like to see from solet’s life.

thank you for reading!

xoxo, a.c.

[spaceorphan18]

Any thoughts on Chris’s latest interview??

I assume you mean this one?

I have not watched it so.... let's live blog, shall we?

I appreciate that he got his hair to stand up on all sides. Looking good Chris ;)

Basics on Chris? I totally guessed his expertise would be related to the paranormal. I completely forgot about the British History love of his, so I'm so not surprised there.

I really was waiting with baited breath to hear if he'd say llamas were his least favorite animal, lol. (Oh god, a lot of you weren't around when he claimed he liked llamas because he said he was a social llama and ended up getting a room full of stuffed llams, lol)

Oh my god, off of Diet Coke? What even?? Also, guys. Don't kill me. Don't revoke my Chris fan card. While I'm glad that he went back into acting - I have no desire to see that film he just made. It sounds like... not my cup of tea. (sorry :( )

The 'who are you' quiz section was super cute. I do love that he gives us little bits into his daily live and world and something that has just not changed is his sharp wit. I have always been a fan of his humor.

Chris's high school experience - I mean he's talked about this a lot over the years. A lot. But the thing that sticks out is this evolution of being okay with it. When he was first on Glee - it was STILL a big trauma. Which makes sense because instead of going to college, Chris went straight from HS to Glee, and omg, what an insane thing to do.

The getting into Glee stuff is... stuff I've heard before. But always glad to hear him speak on it, and again, glad he's in such a better place in life that he can reflect without the being traumatized part. The stuff about his current auditioning is interesting. He admits he doesn't really anymore unless he really wants to... and I'm guessing not really much has come his way that he really wants to do. I have a feeling that he probably won't do a whole ton of acting moving forward, but you never know.

Chris talking about his coming out on Chelsea Handler, lol... I love that he can reflect about being 18, and how differently choices are made when you're that young. But I also love (and get, and my god sometimes still I remember why he's the only celebrity whom I've ever felt was actually a bit like me in thought process) the fact that he was like - I'm gonna try to do this once and never deal with it again. And have it, like, become a bigger ordeal than he could have ever imagined.

I love though, also, that his story is also being contextualized through a queer lens. And, I mean, I felt this way when he was talking with Kevin about their joint experiences -- I'm so, so glad Chris has these queer spaces to have these conversations, because there's a level of knowledge and awareness and perspective you don't get from straight media.

(He took his shoes off, how cute, lol. Also this interview knows, like, nothing about Glee. Fascinating.)

"I would rather be the unicorn in the room than the elephant." -CHRISTOPHER!!! This quote is fantastic.

Getting into the conversation of activism, and how queer culture and community was still very different back in 2009-10 then it is now. And I mean, it's come a long LONG way since I was in high school back in the 90s. We've come a long way in the past fifteen years, even if the asshats in charge are trying to push everyone back to the 50s (or really the 30s :P) Anyway, some great queer history embedded in this.

The conversation about fame being his protection back then is fascinating. Also, how he calls himself ugly (back then). Oh Christopher.

He talked to Shirley MacClaine about aliens. Because of course he did. I love him.

OOhhh, Chris loved every guest star except for one. Any guesses who? (Honestly - I have no idea. so this is a fascinating new tidbit. Perez Hilton? Lol - Chris didn't work him though.)

Also more interesting things to think about - Chris getting a lot of the spotlight early on created resentment. (I wonder if it was Lea... Hmmm.)

Mr - I'm never getting married - actually mentioned that at some point he and Will probably will get married. Don't know if that was kind of a deflection from this dude assuming or if he's changed his mind. But, I mean, c'mon, in any capacity we all know he and Will consider each other done and locked in for life, which Chris basically confirms. (Awww - I love Will.)

Oh god, talking about the tinhatters. Chris, thank fuck for finally talking about this more openly and explicitly. And guys, I told you. I TOLD YOU that this shit happened.

THE HAIR STORY! HE'S TELLING THE HAIR STORY! No, guys, this was almost like urban legend stuff, but yeah, there were rumored instances of people sending hair to Will (and to Mia) and he actually talks about this. Oh my god, I'm laughing (though my god this was not funny at the time)

Oh, god, he thinks there were 100,000 CCers. No. There weren't. That seems too high. The people who were actually crazy were a very, very small number -- who made an unfortunately huge impact.

Oh. God. Also. He is NOT talking about Darren when he talks about people who are still in the closet. He's just not.

Oh for the love of fuckery, this host is just... he had to take a college course to discover fanfiction? C'mon.

Ah, the awkward conversation of celebrities reading fanfic. I wish this conversation would be had with someone who understood it better. Honestly do not like this host's summation of it because -- not just as someone who reads and writes it, but as someone who understands it's influence on published writing and understands its relevance in women's circles, this is a much deeper conversation and this host makes it feel trivialized (because they don't understand it).

Also - I wonder what Chris read, great abs and about cats? lol.

STOP FUCKING CALLING ANY KIND OF QUEER FANFIC SLASH FIC. It's old school term. Now it's just... fanfic. You no longer need to qualify the fic by saying it's slash.

This host is... bugging me a bit. But that's my issue.

They're getting into the writer portion and as a writer myself I'm... honestly a little bored by this. The TLOS convo he's had a million times. He's also talked about his process a lot, which idk, maybe this is more interesting to non-writers but like, yeah, yup, i've been there done that.

Aww, Chris talking about his anxiety issues - I do always love hearing about this, because I feel like mental health issues don't get addressed in the way should.

Um, they end on a section called 'fight me' where Chris debates a position - and his is that only queer actors should play queer roles. I... think that's a nuanced question that deserves more than a 60 second watered down debate and I'm not going to touch it.

And.. yeah, that's what I have to say about that. It's nice to hear from Chris again, so glad he's so much more open about his life and experiences. If I'm being honest, though, I think I do kind of value the conversations more so when he has them with, say, Kevin and Jenna, because there's something more personal going on there.

But that's just me - someone who has followed Chris and his career for, my god, what sixteen years now? Yeah. :)

Hopefully that answers your question, Nonny! lol :)

[bteezxyewriter12]

Corruption/ 4

Pairing- Seonghwa x Named Reader

Word count- 8.9k

Includes- Angst for Seonghwa and reader, watching sex video, missionary, cock riding, multiple orgasms, interrupted sex, confrontation, so much fluff

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxminnie @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@yeosxxx @seokwoosmole @jjongsbebe @wisejudgedragonhairdo @meowmeowminnie @woo-stars @borntowalkaway @usagionthered @san-realblkwife @seonghwasstar @jejeyeppeo @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @prayerofthehaim @realisticnotes @insomniacatiny @stephy-nicole13 @mknae-jongho @bykeynote @amyz78 @blueie-things @ultrapinkvoidbouquet @armystayluv23 @soso59love-blog @annalynsworld

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Corruption Masterlist

📝Masterlists

📝ATEEZ Masterlist

📝Seonghwa Masterlist

Gif Credit- There's a symbol or something in the corner of the gif that I can't make out. If someone knows the creator let me know and I'll link them

Three months later

Seonghwa POV

I'm snapped out of my daydream of Joanne when my coworker, Seulgi, knocks on my office door

"Hey Hwa? You know it's past five right?", she asks

My gaze snaps to my computer and yeah it is

Shit

I'm supposed to meet the guys at six at Yunho's apartment for a "guys" hang out

I'm gonna be late

"Thanks, I lost track of time", I answer, shutting my computer down

"Sure Hwa", she says, leaning against the door frame, waiting for me, I suppose

I put my jacket on and grab my bag

Seulgi steps aside as I close my office door and lock it

I don't trust anyone here

Everyone is so cutthroat, wanting to handle the bigger accounts and I wouldn't put it past anyone to go in my office and fuck with my files

Seulgi and I walk to the elevator, my mind on Joanne and if she'll be awake when I get home tonight

I'm craving to have her legs around my waist, her arms around my body, just cuddling with her

God, I want it now

I'm in my thoughts when I feel a tap on my arm

"Uh Hwa? Are you ok?", Seulgi asks

I look over at her, "Oh yes. Why?"

The elevator doors open and we get in

I press P for parking lot and ask which floor she's getting off on

"Same one as you", she says as the doors close, "Anyway, I was asking if you were ok because I kept calling your name and you didn't answer"

I feel myself blush, hoping she didn't think I was ignoring her

"Oh I'm sorry", I apologize, "I was just thinking about tonight and if I would be able to do everything I wanted to do. That's all"

"Must be intense plans", she laughs

"Yes, I guess so", I say awkwardly

I don't know how to talk to girls or what to do when they speak to me about anything other than work

Even Joanne

I've known her for four years, lived with her for two, had sex with her for five months and I still can't talk to her easily

I'm just a nervous loser when it comes to girls

Seulgi just smiles at me, "Anyway, I wanted to ask you something"

"Ok", I answer, giving her my full attention

"So I wanted to ask if you'd like to go out tomorrow", she says, smiling at me, "With me"

My immediate reaction is no

Because of Joanne

And because it would be my first date and I don't know how to act with a girl for five minutes, a few hours would be a pathetic show for the girl

"We could go out to eat and then to a movie. And maybe you could come over after? To talk, get to know each other more?"

"I uh...I...", I stammer

The elevator pings, the door opening

She walks out and I follow her, both of us standing just outside the elevator door

"Look Hwa, I know you're kinda shy. And I don't want to put pressure on you ok?", Seulgi says, "I just like you a lot and I'd want to see where things could go with us"

I really don't know what to say

I'm just so confused that a girl is actually asking me out

It's so.....unusual

"I'd like it if you could just think about it ok?"

I nod as she hands me a piece of paper

"My number is on there. You can call or text when you decide"

"Ok", I agree

"Great. Hope to hear from you soon"

"Yeah"

"Bye Hwa", she smiles widely then turns and walks into the parking lot

I put the paper in my pocket and head to my car, my mind racing a mile a minute

What do I do?

--------------------------------

"I need your advice", I ask the guys as we sit around Yunho's apartment

They were all here when I got here and they busted my balls for being late

Until I gave them the beer and snacks I stopped to get

Then they shut up and we've been hanging around

Jongho, Wooyoung and Yeosang are playing a video game, Mingi and Yunho are playing a game on Mingi's phone, Hongjoong and San are next to me talking about who knows what

And I'm sitting here wondering what I'm going to do about Seulgi

And I figure I can ask the guys for help since some have girlfriends and the others get girl after girl to sleep with

"What's up Hwa?", Hongjoong asks

"Uh...a girl asked me out"

Everyone stops what they're doing, their eyes on me, making my face flush

"A girl....are you sure?", Wooyoung asks, shocked

"Yes I'm sure", I scowl

God, they act like I'm such an ugly dork

But I can't be

Not with the things Joanne says to me

Telling me how hot I am, how beautiful, how cute

I don't think she's lying

I hope she's not lying

"So what's the problem? You're going aren't you?", Mingi questions

"I uh...I didn't answer yet. I don't know if I should. If I can not be nervous and awkward the whole time"

"Oh my god Hwa, just go", Hongjoong exclaims, "A girl finally showed interest in you. Say yes to the date"

"You may even finally have sex", Wooyoung jabs

"I have sex", I snap without thinking

Shit

I haven't told anyone about me and Joanne yet

I just...I don't want to be asked a million questions or have them talk about her the way they talk about their fuck buddies

That would piss me off

San snorts, "No you don't"

"Not a chance in hell", Yeosang adds

"Your hand doesn't count", Wooyoung adds

"I've had sex before", I argue, "All the time actually"

"You're dreams don't count", Jongho says seriously

"Oh my god, I have sex everyday!"

It's so fucking annoying that they don't believe me

Yes, I was a virgin for 25 years

Yeah, I was naive about it

Yeah, I was scared to have sex, worried I'd suck at it

Yeah, I wondered if anyone would ever be attracted to me in that way

But they don't have to act like I'm making things up

It's insulting

"Yeah ok. With who?", Hongjoong snorts

"Joanne", I snarl

Whatever, they can ask me whatever questions they want

If they start talking shit about her, I'll tell them to shut the fuck up

"You're step sister?", Yunho gapes

I nod, "Yeah"

"Bullshit!", San exclaims

"It's not", I insist

"You're telling me your smoking hot stepsister fucks you?", San demands, "That she took your virginity and fucks you everyday?"

"Yes"

"Liar!"

"Why are you lying Hwa?", Yeosang asks, "You don't have to lie to us to try to be cool or something"

"Oh my god, it's not a lie!"

"Yeah well you know what they say, proof or no go", San declares

I have proof

I have videos

She asked me one time if I wanted to make a porn like the one we watched

I definitely said yes because of course

We filmed it on my phone and I sent her the video so she has it too

And after that...we make a video once a week

"I have videos", I say

"Show us"

I shake my head, "No. She...she didn't say I could show it to anyone"

I'm not showing anyone her naked body or anything we did without her permission

I'm not like that

"Then ask her right now if you can show it to us", Hongjoong orders, "Text her"

"I don't-", I start

"I'm not believing you until I see proof", he informs me

I sigh internally

"If you're not lying then ask her", Wooyoung goads

"Yeah text her"

"I wanna see that video"

They all keep pestering me and I yell fine, then take out my cell phone

"Hey Jo. The guys don't believe me when I say that we sleep together. They want to see one of the videos. But I won't show them unless you say it's ok. Don't feel pressured to say yes ok? I'm good with not showing them. As you know, they're idiots"

"Well?", Yeosang demands

"I texted her! God, give her a chance to answer"

A few minutes go by then my phone rings

"Show them. They could learn a thing or two"

I chuckle as I answer, "Ok. Thanks"

"What'd she say?", Mingi asks

"She said ok", I answer

"Alright, pull up the video. Show us"

I sigh, opening my gallery and pulling up the first video we made

Hongjoong reaches over and presses play

"You sure Hwannie? If you don't want to it's ok", she says as my face comes on the screen

"I'm sure", I nodded

I feel my face heat up as the video progresses

The camera view switched to her, smirking up as she licks along my dick

"No fucking way!", Mingi screams

For the next ten minutes they watch her give me a blow job, deepthroating my dick and moaning the whole time

"Jesus Christ, she knows how to give a blow job", San murmurs, his eyes on the screen

I watch myself cum in the video, her eagerly swallowing all of it, then pulling off, opening her mouth to show me she swallowed all of it

"Oh my god. That's so fucking hot", Yeosang groans

Then next part of the video is me eating her pussy, with them cheering me on as if they're watching it in real time

During this we switched the camera between us, videoing me going down om her and her moaning in pleasure

"Damn Seonghwa, look at you go. She tastes that good?"

I nod, "Yeah"

They have no idea

She cums, screaming my name and I watch myself swallow her cum, craving being between her legs again right now

"Need your cock", she moans, going on top of me, my dick hard again

"You're hard again? How? That wasn't even ten minutes!", Wooyoung gapes

I shrug

I don't know, it just happens every time I eat her pussy

Makes me so horny

In the video, she immediately slides down my dick, moaning my name, her hips rocking on me

The camera pans to get her entire body on top of me, the pleasure in her face evident

She bounces and I swear I can almost feel it right now

"You're so lucky", San whines, as the video goes on, more minutes passing, "She's riding you for so long! So many girls can't do that"

"Not only that but look how many times she cums on his dick", Jongho points out, "We've been watching her ride him for twenty minutes and she came three times already"

"And the things she says to him? How good he feels? The praise? I wish the girls I fucked would say half the shit she's saying", San complains

I smirk to myself, listening to their jealousy

I'd never thought I'd see the day that they were jealous of me

"Yeah but do you hear him?", Wooyoung exclaims, "I didn't know you had such a filthy mouth Hwa"

I shrug

She brings it out of me

Her voice screaming my name blares from my phone, the guys watching her cum yet again

Then we switched positions and they watch me fuck her for the next half an hour, making her cum again and again, it ending with her begging me to cum in her pussy

My voice yelling her name comes from the phone, the guys whooping and cheering

The video stops and the guys erupt in questions and pats on my back

"You seriously dick her down every day?", Mingi asks

"Yeah", I answer

I wouldn't call it that though

It's just us being together

"How does she feel?", Wooyoung asks excitedly

"Uh, good", I say vaguely

"Just good?", Yunho asks

"Very good"

"How's her mouth?"

"Good", I answer again, purposely being vague

I don't want to talk about details

I'm not into that kind of talk

They are

I've heard so many things about girls' pussies and mouths, how they feel, if they're good or not and I always found it kinda unnecessary

I promised myself that when I had sex I'd never speak about it or the girl like that

It's bad enough I showed them the video as proof

They don't need to hear anything else

"C'mon Hwa, your stepsister is hot. Give details", Wooyoung whines

I shake my head, "No. I don't..I'm not comfortable doing that"

"You showed us the video!", San complains

"Because I had to for you to believe me!", I snap, "But I don't have to talk about anything and I'm not. Fuck off"

"Ok ok", Hongjoong interferes, stopping San from yelling at me, "Answer this question. How long have you been sleeping with her?"

"Five months"

"And you're just telling us now?", Mingi gapes

"It's private!", I exclaim, "I only told you now because you're saying I could finally get sex if I go out with this girl! Which is what I asked you about to begin with! If I should go out with her, not about my sex life"

"Well you having sex is a big deal!", Yeosang says

"It's really not", I answer, wanting this part of the conversation to be done with, "I want advice on what I asked you before. That's it"

"And you got it", Hongjoong answers, "Go out with the girl"

"I...I don't know"

"This thing with Jo. Is it just sex?", he questions

"Yeah", I nod

As much as I want it to be more, it is just sex

I don't think she feels for me the way I feel about her

She's the one I really want

She's the one I want to go on my first date with, the one I want to hold hands in public with first, the first girl I want to kiss

I doubt it will ever happen

And I know myself, I will never tell her how I feel

Just the thought of it makes me want to throw up

"Ok so if it's just sex with Jo then you can go out with this girl. Get to know her. Maybe you'll like her and want to be in a relationship with her", Hongjoong advises, "And at the very least what I said still stands, you could have sex with this girl"

"I'm not looking for sex", I argue

"You should be Hwa. God, you're 25! Jo can't be the only girl you ever have sex with!", Wooyoung yells

Why not?

If I want her, if I have feelings for her, why can't she be the only one I have sex with?

Their logic doesn't make sense

"You should be partying Hwa. Having sex with other girls. You've only known one girl sexually. You should be getting more experience", San tells me

I don't want to have sex just to have experience

That's never what it was with her

"Look whether you do or don't have sex with this girl you should at least go out with her. Give her a chance", Hongjoong advises

I guess I can try

See how it goes

If I'm uncomfortable I can always leave

"Yeah ok", I answer

"Great!", Wooyoung says, "And if you get laid, details!"

I scowl at him as I stand up and make my way to Yunho's room so I can call Seulgi

Taking the piece of paper with her phone number on it, I shakily dial her number

Here goes nothing

🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉

J POV

"Someone.....asked you out?", I ask, swallowing hard

This is confusing

Seonghwa came home from Yunho's place and this is the first thing he tells me

Someone asked him out

"Yes. Someone at work", he answers

"Oh...who?"

"A girl. Seulgi. She...she said she likes me and wants to see where things can go with me and her. So she asked me to go out with her tomorrow"

Jealousy and anger flash through my body but I shove it down

I have no reason to be jealous

Seonghwa is not mine

He's someone I sleep with but we're not in a relationship

He's free to do whatever he wants

I am too even though I haven't wanted to fuck anyone else since we started sleeping together

"What uh...what did you say?"

"I uh, I agreed. We're supposed to go to dinner then a movie, I think. Then her apartment? I'm not too sure. I was kinda in shock that someone asked me out that I didn't hear all of it "

That makes me smile a little

He's so clueless that he doesn't even know what's supposed to be happening

It's endearing and adorable

And this bitch could get him all to herself

That thought immediately turns my mood dark again

"Well, I hope you have a good time", I say nonchalantly

He nods, "Thanks"

An awkward silence rises between us that was never there, even during the first time I fucked him

"Can...can you help me? Like find the right clothes to wear? Tell me what I should and shouldn't do?"

Why does he have to ask me that?

I don't want him going out with this girl and I definitely don't want to help him impress her

But he's not mine

And for some reason I don't want anyone to think badly of him, even her

"Yeah Hwa, I'll help you"

"Thanks Jo", he smiles, relief in his face, "You're a life saver"

"Yeah sure", I answer, plastering a smile to my face, "No problem"

We stand awkwardly facing each other and I can't handle it right now

"Uh well, it's late and I'm really tired from work", I say lamely

"Oh yeah ok. Me too"

I nod, "Alright well I'm gonna go to bed. You should too. Be rested for your big date"

"It's not a big date", he says, his cheeks blushing an adorable red

Stop

"Of course it is Hwa. It's your first. Get some rest and I'll help you with what you need tomorrow ok?"

He nods, "Ok. Uh thanks"

"No problem"

With that I turn from him and walk to my room

Once I close the door, it's like my entire body deflates

I don't know exactly what I'm feeling but I just know that Seonghwa going out with another girl is upsetting

It shouldn't be but it is and I don't know what to do with that

Making my way to my bed, I get in it and lay down

I'm not tired but I close my eyes anyway, wanting to sleep so I don't have to feel this way

As I lay there, I realize that this is the first day in five months that Seonghwa and I haven't had sex

It's starting already

--------------------------------

"Are you sure this is ok?", he asks, looking at himself in the mirror, unsure, "It's not too....casual?"

I raise my eyebrow, "Uh no. Isn't this a casual date?"

I helped him pick a nice black T-shirt, a pair of light black jeans and black Nike sneakers

To accessorize I gave him a silver necklace and silver bracelet

I parted his hair to the side and added some hairspray to keep it there

His glasses finish the look and he looks so hot

I just want to take him to my room and rip off the clothes and-

He's not yours, my brain screams

I need to get it together

"Uh I guess it's casual? I don't know, should I be wearing something fancier?"

I shake my head, "You don't want to be overdressed Hwa. This is good for what you described- dinner and a movie. Trust me, you look really good. She's gonna be swept off her feet"

Lucky bitch

He frowns, "Uh ok. I guess"

I nod, checking my cell phone, "Well it's time. You got her address right?"

He nods, picking up his phone, "It's in the gps"

"Well you should go. You don't want to be late for your first date"

God, I hate it

And I find myself wishing he was going on his first date with me

"Yeah ok", he agrees, "Thanks again Jo. For helping"

"Sure", I say, forcing a smile

I gave him good tips too on what to do

Ask questions about her and really listen to what she's saying

But offer stuff about him too so she can get to know him

Smile

Act calm

Brush his hand against hers if he wants to hold her hand; if she moves her against his, hold her hand; if she doesn't then back off

If she invites him into her apartment and he feels comfortable then go

For anything sexual make sure he gets consent and is clear that she wants it

Back off if she says no to anything

And use a condom

He didn't have any, so I gave him a few

I literally couldn't have spelled it out better than that

But he's sweet and endearing naturally if not a bit awkward and girls eat that up

I don't think he'll have a problem

And that makes me feel so upset

He puts on his leather jacket Hongjoong got him for Christmas two years ago that he's never worn but looks so fucking good on him, and he's ready to go

"I'll see you later? Or uh... tomorrow?", he says

I swallow the huge lump in my throat, my cheeks hurting from the fake smiling

"Yeah Hwa. Have fun ok? Relax and be yourself ok?"

He nods, "Ok. Thanks. Goodnight"

"Night"

He leaves, my heart falling to my feet

Turning, I head to my room

I don't feel like doing anything

It's so unlike me

I can find lots of things to do alone

Passing by his room, I stop, staring at his bed from his doorway

Remembering all the times we were in it together

Having sex, cuddling and just sleeping

And wondering if he's going to start bringing this girl here if he sees her regularly, my heart twisting in my chest

My god, I need to cut it out, get a fucking grip

Getting in my room, I sit on my bed, grab a pillow and hold it to my chest, not sure what to do now

All I can think about is Seonghwa on this date

If he'll have a good time

If he'll like her

If he'll fuck her

And from nowhere my eyes start leaking, actual tears falling down my face

I'm crying

What the fuck is happening to me?

I'm crying over a guy?

A guy?

But he's not just a guy

He's Seonghwa

Seonghwa, who was so nice to me when our parents got together four years ago

Seonghwa, who offered to move in with me so I didn't have to pay rent all by myself

Seonghwa, who is always so sweet, so caring, so kind

Seonghwa, who was eager to learn all about sex and is amazing at everything

Seonghwa, who holds me at night, his fingers running through my hair, who kisses the top of my head, who cuddles with me

Seonghwa, who makes me feel things I haven't felt before

Seonghwa, who I wished would kiss me but hasn't and now I'm terrified he's going to have his first kiss with this girl

Seonghwa...

Who I'm completely in love with

I admit it, letting myself feel it

I love him

I want him

I want to be with him

I want to make him smile, make him laugh

I want to hold his hand, cuddle with him all the time, just be near him

I want to go out on dates with him

I want to make him happy

I want to love him

And the devastating thing is I can't

He's out with someone else

Another girl

Which means he doesn't have any feelings for me

He probably just sees me as his depraved slutty step sister who fucks him

I mean I haven't given him any other impression of me

This just sucks

Wiping my eyes, I stand up, deciding to take a shower then just veg out in front of the TV until it's time for bed

I need to get over this

I can't have him and that's it

--------------------------------

Movement in my bed wakes me up

I groggily open my eyes, my eyesight blurry

"Mmmm", I whine as someone moves under the covers with me

"Jagi", he whispers, cuddling up next to me, pulling me against him

What did he just say?

I feel him kiss my shoulder, nuzzling into my neck

"Hwa?", I whisper, still confused on if I'm dreaming or not

He's not supposed to be back tonight right?

Wasn't he supposed to stay with the girl he went on a date with?

"Baby", he says softly

Lifting my head, I meet his eyes, so many emotions swirling in them that my groggy brain can't identify at the moment

His fingers move into my hair, pushing it off my face

He's really here

But why?

He moves closer to me, his soft, smooth, warm lips against mine

My body is immediately awake and on fire, heat running everywhere, my head spinning

He's kissing me

He pulls away, whispering, "I'm sorry if it sucks baby but I don't know how to kiss. Teach me"

I shake my head as I look at him, "It doesn't suck Hwa. Just do what you feel"

He nods, his lips crashing into mine again, the world feeling like it's thrown off its axis and falling away

Everything falling away until it's just Seonghwa

I fully turn my body towards him, my arm moving around his neck as I eagerly kiss him back

His arm moves around me, pulling me right up against him, holding me tightly

And being in his arms feels so fucking right, like I'm where I'm supposed to be

Licking his lips, he slowly opens his mouth and I slip my tongue in

When I brush my tongue against his, his mouth relaxes against mine, his tongue cautiously pressing against mine

I move my fingers in his hair, kissing him slowly, deeply, realizing I'm so fucking happy he's here

He's here with me and there's nothing more I could want

As we continue to make out, he gets more and more confident, his tongue now fully against mine, kissing me passionately

He's a super fucking quick learner

His hand moves under my shirt, touching my skin, his fingers sending sparks of fire through my body

As his hands slide along my body, he pushes my shirt up slowly

Reluctantly moving my arm from around his neck, I pull it through the sleeve of my shirt to try and help him get it off me

He breaks the kiss, sitting up and pulling me up with him

My shirt disappears from my body then I slide his up his body and off of him

His hand moves behind my head, pulling me to him, kissing me hard, his tongue immediately against mine

Seems someone likes kissing, which is absolutely fine by me as I officially love his kisses

Putting my hands on his chest, I slowly move down, feeling his muscles, feeling his skin shivering

When I get to his belt, I undo it, get the button of his jeans undone and pull the zipper down

My hands find their way into his boxers, pushing everything down

He pulls away, moving off my bed, taking all his clothes off

Getting back in bed with me, he kisses me, gently pushing me on my back

He pulls my pj shorts and panties down with me kicking them off to help him

He immediately moves on top of me as I open my legs, him laying between them, his mouth relentless against mine, tongue down my throat and I love every second of it

I slide my fingers in his hair, holding the silky strands, his hand around my boob, squeezing hard

"Please", he murmurs between kisses

"Hwannie", I whine, wrapping my legs around him

His hips move forward, his hard cock sinking into me

I gasp in his mouth, feeling him spread me open as he moves in a little at a time

My body arches off the bed into him, his arm moving around my waist, holding me against him

I feel every inch, every ridge of his cock forcing me open, filling me up so fucking satisfyingly

I swear he's the only one who had ever made sex so satisfying

I never felt that with anyone but him

He buries his length inside me, his head nestled against my spot and I can't help clenching hard around him

"Fuck", he groans, starting to move as he drags his kisses to my neck, "Fuck jagi"

My heart swells in happiness hearing him call me jagi

He's never called me that before

I hope it means more than just a name but I'm not getting my hopes up

"I just want you", he moans, his cock sliding in and out, his fat head brushing against my spot again and again, pleasure that only he can give me taking over

"Hwannie", I whimper

"Baby. Just want you. Only you. I don't want to be inside anyone who's not you", he whispers against my neck as he moves, thrusting a slow but hard pace, his cock going in so deeply, "I don't want anyone who's not you"

I let his words wash over me and fuck, I feel my heart fill with hope

Hope that this is more

"I only want you Hwa", I tell him, kissing the side of his face as he kisses my neck

"I want you so much Jo", he murmurs, lifting his head, kissing my cheek, "Just you"

"Hhh..how? How do you want me?", I find myself asking through the bliss

Fuck, his cock is so fucking good, splitting me open so widely, making me drench him

I keep my hands on his back, feeling his muscles move as he fucks me, my fingers digging in his soft skin

I move my hips, meeting his thrusts, his cock hitting deeper, stars blasting in my vision

"I want you to be mine. Please baby", he begs, his arm around me tightening, keeping me against him as he moves, "Be mine. My girlfriend. My jagi"

My heart bursts in utter joy at his words

"Yes Hwannie. I'm yours. Only yours. I want to be just yours", I answer then press my lips to his, kissing him desperately

He meets my desperation, his tongue playing with mine as I pour all my love into it, hoping he feels it

Our movements speed up slightly, our thrusts getting harder, his cock so pleasurably deep inside me, I can feel him in my stomach

"Mine", he murmurs against my lips as I nod

"Seonghwa", I cry, so close, his head hitting my spot constantly, my pussy clenching hard around him

"Yeah baby", he urges, "Cum for me. Cum around my cock. Show me you're mine. Show me"

"Seonghwa! Seonghwa! Oh, Seonghwa!", I moan, bliss assaulting my body as I cum hard around his length, clenching his cock again and again

"Yes, yes, yes", he cries in my neck, his hips not stopping, pounding into me as I orgasm, "Mine. Mine. You're mine"

"Yours", I cry, as the pleasure slowly leaves, "Only yours Hwa"

My arms move around his neck, pulling him right into a kiss that we both melt into

I roll him over, both of us moving until he's sitting up, I'm straddling his lap, our lips never moving from each other's

I sit on his dick, getting him all in in one shot because I'm so fucking wet for him

"Fuck", he moans, "Fuck jagi, I love being inside you. Don't want to leave"

"Don't Hwannie. Stay"

He nods, "Ride me baby"

He leans back on his arms as I move mine around his neck and start to bounce

"Oh fuck, so good", he murmurs, his head tilting back

I take in the sight of him, his gorgeous face in pleasure, his eyes closed, biting his bottom lip

He's fucking stunning and he's all mine

"My Hwannie", I whisper, kissing his neck as I impale my cunt on his cock over and over again

God, he's so thick, wrecking my pussy on his cock

I can't get enough of him

"Yours jagi. I'm yours", he assures me, "I was always yours. Only yours"

Taking his length all in, I grind against him, his head against my spot, making me shiver

He lifts my face from his neck, his lips on mine, kissing me as if he's never going to again

He just learned to kiss but he's already a fucking amazing kisser

Then again I'm biased

His arm moves around me, holding me against him, his other hand reaching between us, fingers playing with my clit

I moan in his mouth, soaking and clenching his length as the pleasure intensifies and I keep rocking on him

"So good baby", he murmurs between kisses, rubbing my clit faster, "So tight for me"

I nod, moaning against his lips, my fingers in his hair, pulling as I get closer

"Yes baby, throb harder for me", he groans, "So fucking good baby. Cum for me"

The next rub of my clit sends me over the edge, bliss hitting me hard as I cum on his perfect dick

"Hwa, fuck Hwa"

"Yes fuck", he moans, "Cum all over me baby. Fuck, cream my cock just like that jagi"

My god, the mouth on his man is fucking insane

Everything he says just turns me on more and more

As soon as I finish, he murmurs, "Bounce on my cock jagi"

I lean my forehead against his as I do just that, slipping up and down his incredibly hard cock, making him open me up over and over

His hand leaves my clit, moving behind him as he leans back

His other arm is still wrapped securely around me, his sweaty skin right against mine

"So good baby", he murmurs, "My pretty pussy is so good for me. So tight. So warm. So fucking wet"

"All for you Hwa", I confirm, riding him harder, "Only for you"

"Fff...uck", he groans, "Kiss me jagi"

I attach my lips to his, kissing him deeply as I move, bringing both of us closer

My pussy chokes his cock as he throbs inside me, loud moans escaping between our lips, adding to the completely pornographic wet sound of my cunt taking his cock again and again

Sliding down, his cock smashes against my spot and I lose it, ecstacy tidal waving over me as I cum on him

He shoves his hips up, his cock pulsing, his warm cum spilling inside me as my pussy pumps him for all of it

"Yes Hwannie", I moan in complete pleasure

"Joanne, baby. Fuck", he cries, shaking against me

Leaning down, I press kiss after kiss to his face while he cums, not wanting my lips off him

When we finish, he stops me, turning his head, his lips right against mine

I fall into his kiss, knowing I will never have enough of them

And knowing I can have them all the time now

Fuck, it's perfect

Pulling away, we smile at each other, then just fall into laying together

His arms move around me like they're supposed to while I lay on his chest, my hand tracing his muscles

As happy as I am that he's here, he's mine, I can't help but wonder how the date went

"Hwa?", I call

"Yeah jagi?"

"Was....was the date bad?"

He's silent for a few seconds then he says, "Yeah. It was terrible. It was awkward the whole time. I don't know what the movie was about and I can't remember what I ate at the restaurant"

"You were that nervous?"

"I...sort of"

I have to know if he went to her apartment

If her kissed her

If he fucked her

It won't change how I feel about him or change my mind about being with him but I have to know

"Did you go to her apartment?"

"Yeah", he answers quietly

"Did you uh-"

"No"

I lift my head, looking at him, his eyes meeting mine

"You didn't do anything with her?"

He shakes his head

"But she...didn't she.."

"She tried. She wanted to....but..I couldn't", he whispers, "I couldn't think of anything but you the whole time"

My eyes widen at his words

Me?

He thought of me?

Why?

"Me?", I repeat

He nods, "Jo, I...the reason I don't remember what I ate or what the movie was about wasn't because I was nervous. It was because I was thinking about you. I was wondering what you were doing, wondering how it would be if I was out with you instead of her. Wanting to be with you"

Ok, I'm shocked at this

It's not everyday a guy tells you they were thinking about you while out with another girl

"I missed you", he says

"I missed you too Hwa", I confess

He smiles softly, his fingers still moving though the strands of my hair

"She tried to kiss me and...I couldn't jagi", he says softly, "I didn't want my first kiss with her. I wanted it with you"

"How come baby?", I ask softly

I'm happy his first kiss was with me, god knows I wanted it to be with me but why did he want that?

"Because Jo...fuck...I wanted my first kiss to be with the girl I'm so in love with"

My eyes widen, my jaw dropping as his confession penetrates my brain

Did he say...

"What?", I breathe

"I'm in love with you", he says softly, fear in his eyes, "I...I have been for awhile and I was terrified to tell you. I didn't think you felt anything for me which is why I went on the date. But...but when she leaned in to kiss me, I couldn't do it. I moved my head back immediately, away from her and I stood up from her couch, apologizing and telling her I couldn't kiss her"

That must have been super awkward but I'm glad he stopped it

"She asked me why, I told her because I loved someone else and I had to leave. I apologized again but I don't think she'll ever talk to me again"

Yeah I don't think so either

I wouldn't

"Not that I care", he says, "I only care about you. I only love you"

I smile, stroking his cheek softly

"I love you Seonghwa", I tell him, a shocked look on his face, "I fell in love with you too. I just didn't realize it until tonight, after you left. And honestly, I...I was scared that you would have your first kiss with her"

He shakes his head, "It could never be with anyone but you Jo. I can never kiss or be with anyone but you"

I raise my eyebrow, "But I'm your first and so far your only. You may want to experience what it's like with someone else at some point"

"Why does everyone say that?", he asks, "Wooyoung said it too. He said I should be partying and fucking every girl I come across. It's stupid"

I mean I don't know

Isn't that what people do?

"Jo, I love you ok? I don't see sex as an experience I need to have with multiple people. It was never that for me. I never cared about fucking lots of girls. If I did I would of lost my virginity a long time ago"

Huh, I didn't think of it that way

"I love you and I only want to have sex with you. I don't care about anyone else. You make me happy, you are the one I want. I know myself jagi and I'm not going to want anyone but you"

I smile at him, "You make me happy too Hwa. I love you so much baby. I don't want anyone but you either"

He nods, "So how about we just forget about that stupid stuff and just be together?"

"That sounds like an awesome plan baby", I tell him

He smiles his gorgeous smile right before I kiss his soft lips, sparks running up my body

I fucking love him so much

After, we lay back down together, his arms are around me just like how it should be

As he runs his fingers in my hair, he says softly, "Jagi, will you go on a date with me tomorrow?"

I smile, nodding, "Absolutely baby"

"Great", he exclaims and I can hear the smile in his voice

"I'm excited baby"

"Me too", he says, kissing the top of my head, "But for now let's sleep ok? I woke you up and you must be tired"

"Yeah", I agree, glancing up at him, "Not only did you wake me up but you wore me out too"

His cheeks get pink as he chuckles, "I mean, you wore me out too baby"

"So sleepy time then", I answer, cuddling into his chest more

"Sleepy time", he confirms

"I love you Hwa"

"I love you Jo", he says, "Night jagi"

"Night baby"

I close my eyes and drift off to the feel of Seonghwa playing with my hair

🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉🐉

One month later

J POV

"Come here", Seonghwa murmurs as I pass by the couch, pulling me down on top of him

He kisses me, our arms moving around each other as he lays me on the couch, my head on the arm rest, him moving on top of me

"Again Hwannie?", I laugh as he pulls his shirt I'm wearing off me

"Again", he says, kissing my neck, getting my legs around his waist, "And again and again and again"

"What about the movie?", I whimper

We've been trying to watch this movie all day

We just keep getting distracted

"Maybe later"

I giggle knowing it's not happening today

We're supposed to go out with his friends later then they're coming here to hang out for awhile

They're really cool guys and I want to get to know them better

"You know there's not going to be a later", I smile

"Yeah I know", he answers

His lips press against mine, his tongue playing with mine as his hard cock slides into my pussy

Pleasure takes over as I lift my hips and push down, helping him bottom out

He moans softly, his hands gripping my thighs as he starts to move

"Fuck so good jagi", he murmurs, dragging his kisses down my neck

Good is right

And it seems like we both can't get enough of each other

It's like once we actually got together, the sex amped up

We have frequent days like today where the only thing we do is have sex

Sometimes we have sex in public too when we can't wait

We've done it in his car multiple times

I've gone to visit him at his job and we fucked in his office a lot too

I saw the girl he went on the date with

I knew it was her by the nasty look she gave me, when she saw us leaving his office, his hand holding mine

He nodded at her, then lead me to the parking garage where we had sex in his car, then more at home

Of course we go out and do other things

Seonghwa loves to take me on dates, always planning such sweet and fun things to do

He also loves taking pictures of us and posting them on his Instagram

He's so fucking cute

Living together is the best

He moved into my room because mine is the biggest and his room became like a storage room for now

I love coming home to him everyday, love just hanging out with him, love sleeping in his arms every night

And I absolutely love hearing him tell me he loves me

He says it all the time and I make sure I always tell him I love him too

"Hwa", I moan as his cock impales me, his head constantly rubbing against my spot, making me wetter and wetter

"Yeah jagi, soak me baby", he groans, his mouth sucking on the skin of my neck, "Drench my cock baby"

His mouth moves to another spot, sucking hard and I know he's gonna leave more marks on me

He just started doing this when we got together

He sucked hard on my neck during sex one day and left a mark

He apologized profusely thinking I'd get mad

He was so surprised when I told him I don't care and to leave more

It's fine, I can cover it up with foundation for work

And ever since that day, I have his hickies all over my body

Trails of them starting from my neck going down to my chest, down my stomach, all the way to my pussy and all over my inner thighs

I love it

He lets me do it to him too but I avoid his neck

But his chest and abs are free reign and are just as covered as my body is

We both get off on looking at them

"Baby", he groans, his hips moving faster, fucking me wide open, my pussy throbbing around his cock, his pelvis rubbing my clit over and over

"Hwa", I groan, getting closer

His hands slide up my body, around my back, holding me against him as his lips crash into mine

I kiss him wildly, my arms around his neck, fingers in his soft hair

His cock throbs hard inside, feeling utterly good

Just a little more and we're both gonna cum

My head is in the clouds, the pleasure amazing, nothing in the world existing except for me and him

"Seonghwa!", a voice shouts, the front door to our apartment slamming open

What the fuck?

Who the fuck is that?

"Oh my god, Seonghwa what are you doing?", the voice shrieks

He sits up quickly, horror on his face as he grabs the blanket we threw on the floor, throwing it over my body and his lower half

I sit up and turn my head to the door, my eyes popping out when I see his fucking mother in the doorway

What the fuck is she doing here and how the hell did she get in?

"Mom", he gapes, as he puts his boxers on under the blanket, "What are-"

"What are you doing Seonghwa? Are you...having sex with your sister?"

Ewww

I'm not his sister, no where close to that actually

"She's not my sister, mom. That's gross"

"And it's gross that you are sleeping with her!", his mother yells, "You lost your virginity to her! After I told you she's a dirty whore"

I just snort, grabbing his shirt off the floor and putting it on

Here we go with her weird views on sex

"Don't call her that", he snaps, "She's my girlfriend"

"No she isn't. She's your sister", his mom insists, "And you're proudly parading the information that you are dating your sister on your Instagram! The Instagram our family sees!"

So that's how she knew about us

He told me he wasn't going to tell her anything and I agreed that was the right decision because of this shit

I didn't know she used Instagram and by the look on his face he didn't either

"No one in our family cares", he argues, "Some even compliment me on finally having a girlfriend. And most of the family says she's beautiful and they're happy for me"

"Of course they say that on a public platform! They'll have something different to say in private"

Somehow I don't think so

She's just crazy

"I don't care!", he says loudly, "I don't care what anyone says! She is not my sister. We met when we were 21, we were never siblings. She is my girlfriend and I love her"

She scoffs, "Love her? Please. She's just a slut who opens her legs for you"

"Oh my god, I'm not a slut", I snap

Well, I'm a slut for him, but I doubt she'd appreciate that information

She scowls at me, "You are. Look what you're doing to my son. He never acted this way, never argued with me before he moved here with you"

I roll my eyes, "My god, he's a fucking man, not a little boy! He can make decisions for himself. I didn't force him to move in with me, I didn't force him to be with me. It just happened. And for your information, I fucking love Seonghwa very much. I'd never hurt him"

She sneers, "Yes you will. It's just a matter of time before you spread your whoring legs for another man and hurt my son"

Yeah I'm done, I'm not arguing with a crazy woman

"Stop talking to her like that!", Seonghwa shrieks, standing up, "She loves me, mom, like I love her"

"No", his mom shakes her head, "No, you will break up with her right now and move out of this whorehouse! Come back home until you find a proper girl to marry"

Goddamn, she belongs in like the 1500s with her shit

"No", Seonghwa shakes his head, "I'm not breaking up with her. I love her and I'm staying here with her"

"Seonghwa, stop this right now and listen to me", she yells, "Do what I say"

"No!", he yells back

I can see him getting angrier, which is something I haven't seen before

He's always so easy going

"I'm not leaving her", he says clearly, "I'm not doing what you tell me to. I'm an adult and I can make my own decisions"

"You can't stay with her, she's your sister!", his mother shouts

He throws his hands up in the air, "Fine, then I'm in love with my sister! I'm staying with my sister!"

"Seonghwa-"

"No, you don't want to accept that we are not siblings. We did not grow up together, we were adults when we met, we were more friends than anything else. We are not related in any way and us together is not wrong", he snaps, "But if you want to insist on the stupid titles that in no way describe me and her then fine. I'm dating and fucking my sister and I don't care"

"Seonghwa please. You're acting crazy"

He snorts, "No, you're acting crazy. You can't even be happy for me. You have to come here and rant, trying to get me to leave her"

"It's the right thing Seonghwa. She's no good for you"

I find it hilarious that she hates me yet loves my dad

And how my dad deals with this level of insanity, I don't know but bless his heart

"She is. I'm sorry you don't like her but I don't care. I love her and I'm going to be with her. I don't care if you don't like it", he argues, "If you don't want to accept it then I don't know what to tell you"

"I do not accept it", she snaps, "And as long as you are with her, you are not my son any longer"

Wait, hold on, I don't want him to lose his mother because of me

Yeah she's crazy but I don't know if he's prepared to be cut off from her

"If that's what you decided then fine", he says, crossing his arms

"You're making a mistake", she growls

"No, I'm not", he says, "You can leave now"

"Hwa", I call, panicking

I do not want him to make a decision he'll regret

She nods, "Fine. When you realize your mistake you can come home. Until then stay with your whore"

With that she turns around and strides out the door, slamming it on her way out

He walks to the door, locking it then coming and sitting next to me

"We need to call the landlord and tell him to change the locks", he says, picking up his cell phone

"Uh Hwa?", I say softly

He looks over at me, "Yeah?"

"Hwa, do...do you realize what happened?", I ask, "You're mom...she kinda disowned you"

"Yeah I know", he answers, shrugging

I'm a little confused

He's acting like nothing happened

"You're ok with that?"

He puts his phone down, turning to me and taking my hands in his

"Yeah jagi, I'm ok with it", he says, "Not for nothing, I know how crazy my mom is about sex and relationships. It never bothered me before because I didn't have a girlfriend. The guys, they kinda deprogrammed all the shit she put in my head from when I was a kid. I...I was a virgin because I'm a dork and bad with women, not because of her bullshit"

"You're not a dork baby", I tell him

He smiles, "Thanks baby but yeah I am. It's ok, I've accepted it. But before you, I just let her talk, yes-ed her to death and forgot about what she said. But I have you now and I'm not going to let her talk bad about you"

"But I don't want you to resent me for losing your mom", I say, "I don't want you to give up your family because of me"

He shakes his head, "It's not just because of you jagi. It's because of me too. My mom wouldn't be happy with any girl I'm with unless she hand picks her. And I was never going to go for that"

He lifts his hand, softly running his fingers in my hair

"I will never resent you jagi. I made the choice to let her leave and I'm fine with it. I love you Jo, you're everything to me. My mom doesn't have to like you or like that we're together but she has to accept it. And if she can't that's her problem, not mine", he explains, "I will never let anyone talk shit about you or call you nasty names"

I smile at him, "Thank you Hwannie. I won't let anything say shit or call you names either"

He nods, "I know you won't baby. You're the feisty one out of the two of us"

I am but he's getting there too

He's very protective

"I love you Hwa", I tell him

A smile bursts on his face, taking my breath away

"I love you Jo. So much. Always"

I nod, "Always"

Leaning closer to him, I press my lips against his in a sweet soft kiss

My god, he is my everything

The best man I could ever be with

Some of my ex's were doozies, assholes or just selfish

Seonghwa is the complete opposite and he makes me so happy

"Ok jagi, let's call the landlord to change our locks ASAP. Then we can finish what we were doing", he smirks

"Yeah baby ok", I answer, smirking back then leaning against him, his arm moving around me

I can't stop staring at his beautiful face as he talks to the landlord, thinking about how lucky I am to be his

[boosnotes]

Metal Sonic x reader

Warnings: reference to a destroyed city, but you're ok

Genre: fluff

A/n: I want to write about metal, but I have no idea what to make that isn't lowkey fucked up, I don't feel like I'd make a good job with those, or finding him just broken. also, fun fact, after writing this, ive found an amy fic who had the same mentality as reader towards sonic

You let out a soft laugh, a pile of trash and metal accumulated in front of you, you were roughened up by the latest battle, it was kind of cute seeing the culprit of all this disaster just there, lying on the ground, broken. You took a sit on him, which made the motors work again, turning him on but not without major issues, making him immobile. You could hear the battery running, the loud sound of the engine overworking itself, fighting its way to stay alive, just like any other creature.

Finally, his head moved, and the red eyes were aimed in your direction. A smirk showed up on your face, triumphant that you had some control over him, right now you were the more powerful one, it's a rare moment of enjoyment.

"So? Having a fun time?" You teased, trying to make him do something other than staring, but it was met with nothing. "Right… It's your classic form… I guess I'll have to do all the talking"

You played with the little grass that was left after all the chaos, it was going to die anyway, everything green around here was. It would take so much hard work putting everything back to normal if that even is possible.

A sigh left your mouth, annoyed at the entire situation. "Sonic is not gonna help a bit, he never does. Probably he has left already, looking for his next adventure while we need to take responsibility for everything." You grumbled, now resting your cheek against your knees.

He was good at beating up bad guys, but he was mostly the reason bad guys caused this much disaster. A necessary evil, in some sort of way. Still, the fact that he leaves just as fast as he comes doesn't makes you not like him that much any less.

Your eyes darted back at the robot under you, an idea popping into your mind. Maybe he could be rewired, he's a machine after all. If Tails hasn't left yet, maybe he could take up the challenge, he'd definitely enjoy it. You stood up and pat the dirt off your clothes, then you turned towards him and put a foot on him, wiggling him around, a bit for fun and a bit to see if he'd fight back.

"Can you try moving?" His head moved with normalcy, now facing the sky, but his limbs were another story, some twitching, others weren't even responding. Another heavy sigh, while biting your nail, you thought as hard as you could, would carrying him be that hard?

Taking your foot off from him, you collected all the strength you had and pulled him up, hugging him from under his arms. Just putting him up made sweat come out from your skin, and the fact he started moving around, panicking, made your job not any easier.

"Stop doing that! I'm going to help you!" Which wasn't a complete lie, but it was more to help yourself, a future investment for the world. He continued shuffling in your grasp, but after some time, he stopped when you didn't put him down, realizing he was not as effective as before. You held him like that until it was evident he'd stop, and with the help of physics, you moved him onto your bag. Who would've thought you'd end up giving Metal Sonic a piggyback ride?

The sun was setting, it took you a lot of time, but you walked back home with a new trinket. Maybe things don't have to be that way, maybe there's a chance for betterment. It was a stupid part of you that let you follow your plans, but you also hoped he could be free from his way of thinking, even become buddies.

Let's hope this works out.

You flinched a little when you felt his head rest against your neck, but smiled softly to this. That hope just grew a little bigger. You two stayed like that the entire way, him all over you, letting you have his life in your hands.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Adam chased after him: Abel! Wait!

Fuck Adam moved fast for a bigger guy, must be the long legs. Lucifer got up to follow when he heard a voice he hadn't in so long.

Michael: Is that Lucifer I see!? You've got a lot of nerve showing up around here after you ditched your family.

Lucifer growled: Piss off you sell out! I make more money now making toys then you do as an overrated jester!!

Michael: Hehehe, someone's still salty aren't you little bro?~

-

Adam: Abel!? Oh, honey where are you!?

He looked over and saw his son disappear into a fun house. He chased him and went inside. When he finally found Abel, he was sitting on a slow ride going in a circle.

Adam: Abel.....

Adam joined him: I take it you're not having fun.

Abel sniffed: I didn't even want to come here!

Adam blinked back his own tears: I'm sorry buddy ...... I thought you loved it here.

Abel: Yeah, when I was five and my parents didn't hate each other and my dad didn't flirt with some blonde dick head.

Adam sighed: Abel, your mother and I, we weren't-..... We aren't-.... We are not in-.... Oh it's a mess.

They stayed silent for a moment.

Abel: Are you going to run away with him? Leave me behind where I can't find you?

Adam: What!? No! Never!

He pulled his son into a hug, rubbing his back gently.

Adam: You're my number one person Abel, I would never leave you.

Abel smiled, a tear slipped from his cheek. Adam scooped him up with ease, it was a good thing his boy was shorter than most teens.

Adam: Come on buddy, you're right. You're much too old for this place. Let's go home.

The light in his life

@things-arent-what-they-seem66

Adam groaned as he finally woke up from another barely restful sleep. He sat up and ran a hand through his short, chocolate locks tiredly before sitting up and getting out of bed. His mind and body went into autopilot as he took a shower, cleaned his face and teeth, and took his medication before finally donning a robe and heading downstairs to get some breakfast.

He automatically grimaced as he heard his wife's laughter before he even entered the kitchen. He saw Lilith pacing as he animatedly talked to a friend on the phone. However, her face stained when she noticed his presence.

She turned her back on him and continued her chat. Adam felt his irritation stir within him as he grabbed a mug and poured some coffee in it.

Abel: Morning Dad!

His lips pulled upwards at the sound of his seventeen-year-old. He turned around and saw his son eating on the marble counter. His smile doubled as soon as he saw Abel's.

Adam: Morning bud.

He went to sit down next to him and try to enjoy his morning with his son. Keyword, tried. He was just about to read the paper when he was barraged by Lilith.

Lilith: Well, I'm off I'll be gone for the majority of the day, but I'll be back here around four thirty or so to pick you up. When I get back, I want you both in your suits got that?

Abel: Yes mom.

Abel replied before going back to his breakfast. Adam sat there confused, however, picking him up and Abel to where?

Adam: Um Lilith where we are going tonight?

Lilith pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed heavily: Adam I thought I told you this already. Tonight is the company party.

Adam: No, that's not right the company's anniversary isn't until a few months from now.

She narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms: No, this is the anniversary of when your parents' company and my parent's company merged. Don't you remember? Because before that little contract was sealed another contract was sealed between us.

Adam knew exactly what she was getting into, she was talking about their marriage. About seventeen years ago Lilith's parents were having a rough patch with their own company. Even if their business was still lucritive in certain areas.

They decided to get help from Adam's parents, and they said that they could simply merge their companies as one. That way they would all still have rights to them as one day their children would too.

However, there was only one way for a merge such as this to happen. One minute Adam was being introduced to a beautiful girl the next he was standing at the altar saying I do. What made it even worse was that they were only eighteen at the time.

No, the worst possible outcome is being married to this beautiful yet cynical creature. At least there was one small yet noticeable light that came from this, Abel.

Adam was pulled out of his thoughts by his wife snapping her sharp, well-manicured fingers in his face.

Lilith: Ahem, as I was saying since this is our "family" company party Jr. is allowed to attend. But I want you to make sure he stays on his best behavior for the ENTIRE evening. Is that clear?

Adam: Crystal.

Lilith: Good, then I'm off.

Adam's hardened gaze followed her retreating form as she left. Not even bothering to at least say goodbye to their son. Adam started to take in big gulps of his drink, trying to ready himself for the day.

--

Adam downed yet another glass of champagne trying to keep himself busy as he watched the guests mingle about. Abel was not that far away talking to a few of the employees' children. Though Abel tended to be on the shyer side his friendly character always brought others to him.

Adam: (mutters) At least you're having a good time.

The sound of a familiar voice drew Adam's attention to Lilith.

Adam: (mutters): And so are you.

She wasn't that far from him yet didn't take any note or acknowledgment of him there. Or maybe she did, and she simply didn't care. Adam however did take notice in the topic she and her friends were discussing.

Him.

Despite everything in him screaming to walk away he got a little closer to them and listened closely.

Stella: So, tell me darling what is he like in bed? Is he at least desirable then?

Lilith: Ugh, don't make me laugh he is HORRENDOUS under the sheets. It's like he has no idea what to even do with it. And it was one thing back before he started taking those damn happy pills. Because at least then he wasn't bad to look at. Now every single time I have to lay with him it's like a walrus is trying to squash me!

Her friend let out a haughty laugh: Oh, I can't even imagine the horror of that brute naked let alone actually bedding someone.

Lilith: What makes it worse is that he practically has breasts now. Breasts Stella! But that's not even the absolute most dreadful part of being married to him.

Stella: Oh? What is then?

Lilith: I have to do all the work! I run his company; I run the house, and he even wants me to run him ragged in the sheets!

Stell: (gasps) You're not suggesting-

Lilith: Yup! From the very beginning, he had me do all the work while he lay there on his back like a log. A true bore and pathetic excuse for a human being. I'm glad I only had to birth one child so I could stop pretending to want to bed him.

The rest of the conversation was drowned out as stared down at himself. A hand going to his extended waistline and grimacing. He really had let himself go hadn't he?

Retracting the hand back he used it to scrub over his face in an attempt to stop the tears from flowing. Instead, he decided to find something stronger than champagne to drown himself in.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

if 9&10 were "dont wander off", and 11&12 were "the doctor lies", 13s rule #1 is "dont question me"

"have we not had a good time together" shes pointing yaz to the rule that yaz very well knows is there: we can travel if you dont ask me any difficult questions. yaz knows this is the rule - "because you ask too many questions", "this team structure isnt flat" - but she also was the one to invite the doctor into her home so im pretty sure she also knows shes not gonna kicked out that easily. she has some leeway. which she has been using between revolution and flux, which is why the doctor reminds her of the rules

i dont think she'd kick her out though. she wouldnt. i think it's just that the more you break the rule, the more unpleasant she becomes to be around, and eventually youre gonna walk out on your own. she doesnt want you to, she'd rather you stay and dont ask questions. but if youre gonna try to ask questions anyway, i think thats whats gonna happen

and yaz must think so too. because she does back off. because she doesnt want that to happen either. and it does anyway

[ra-vio]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[libraford]

There was just so much "I'm glad they're out, but I'm not going to hold their hand and welcome them into our spaces."

Which is like... the first part of that is what I was suggesting. I wasn't even asking people to be nice beyond acknowledgement that them leaving was a good thing. And I did over-react a little bit because it was somewhat obvious that it was a lot of bad faith reads, but you know... I just don't react well to being called a nazi apologist.

And part of this is that I'm coming fresh out of doing research for the conversion therapy ban, where I had to hear so many strawman and slippery slope arguments as to why parents should be allowed to enroll their gay children into a program that has a less than 1% success rate and a 40% increase in suicide and is mostly characterized by literal torture.

And I saw both supporters and opponents of the ban say things that completely missed the point because they didn't read thoroughly or critically. But the important thing, I guess, was that they were angry.

While researching, I came across the oldie-but-goodie: Westboro Baptist Church- which I hadn't thought about since we were still in college.

But Fred Phelps just straight up hated everything. Like damn. That man really had unearthly amounts of hate in him. And he'd put ideas in people's heads and they'd rotate it around for awhile and they'd end up hating a version of events that barely resembled reality and... well, sometimes people get caught up in hating something so much that they don't read through.

And I think that things like anger, fear, hatred... they can be addicting to some people. I know that I have to limit my intake of The Horrors to digestible things written in plain language, and that I have to do it around the same time every day, or I'll just keep looking for more. And there haven't been very many resolutions to things, so its kind of like a cat chasing a laser pointer.

But I had a positive outcome with the conversion therapy ban. It made me feel good. Even if some of the people who were on my side of the issue somewhat missed the point, it felt good to celebrate a win. So I saw the exit group as another win, even if it was a small one.

I understanding wanting an Acceptable Target. The more I read about conversion therapy, the more I fucking hated Gary Cooper and Michael Bussee. Like I want to throw rocks at these people who left a legacy of hatred and a trail of bodies.

Finding out that they both left Exodus International to (1979 equivalent of) marry each other kind of took the breath out of that. That so many of the leaders and faces of the movement spoke out and said 'I was wrong and I am sorry for the damage I've done' gave me mixed feelings. As late as 2013, decades after the founders of the movement left, still dealing with the fallout and only just now in 2025 are people starting to get with the program on banning the practice of literal torture.

Having an Acceptable Target didn't make all of it not happen. And them apologizing didn't stop the movement. Even with a ban in place, I think that the change will be slower than I would like.

So its like... why am I putting this much energy into wanting them to feel pain when one of them already died of AIDS and the other one has been an outspoken opponent of the movement he started? Its not... its not gonna change where we are.

I'm trying to look more into the concept of what I'm doing instead of the person who is doing it. Like don't get me wrong: I want Elon Musk, Donald Trump, JD Vance, and Mike Pence to all have really ironic deaths. I think it would be satisfying to read in the 1-hour I set aside for easily-digestible news reports. I think that's a human thing to want.

Not gonna fix the problems. The problems are bigger and less easily solved than the richest man in the world falling into a vat of acid (oh god please it would be so funny.) They're concepts. They're isolationism and Rugged Individualism and Corporate Greed. Its racism and xenophobia and misogyny and transphobia and ableism. And the people who think that they cannot, will not, and could never be guilty of those things is disturbingly susceptible to propaganda.

Acceptable Targets are satisfying. Sometimes it can be productive, like when you punch a Nazi and they stop spreading their shit! But punching a Nazi doesn't end Nazism all at once. You have to keep punching them. And you also have to understand why there are Nazis. And you also have to learn why they recruit who they recruit. And this means finding empathy for your enemy, which is hard to do. And the work is long! And sometimes its boring! And sometimes its thankless! And sometimes its fucking impossible!

So I see why some people would prefer Acceptable Targets. We all do it. Which is why I believe in patience in lieu of forgiveness. The work is long. Lives are short.

Not to dwell on the subject, but somewhere along the line the word 'cheer' got misinterpreted to mean 'take an active role in a person's healing process and forgive them wholesale of their actions, shield them from the consequences, and vote for them when they run for senator.'

[leslie057]

AHH

[balkanballad]

had a day that made me think oh that was a bit heavy on the symbolism, wasn't it

[variousqueerthings]

HAHAAAA:

yes, we have watched mohjo rising. the wikipedia order of episodes is different than the youtube watch and idk if that's a mistake on the youtube side, but i didn't notice until several episodes in, and now it's kinda too late to change. but would be interesting changing the order next time to see how it changes the dynamics. i quite like this one so farrrr, but i hate the idea im getting the emotional continuity back-to-front -- like if odds comes before ladies man that throws off all kinds of things, and i don't like that, but is that just because i watched ladies man first??? have i been bamboozled into the classic trick of "what you watch first tends to stick"? or is it genuinely better in my order

frannie recrushing on fraser reminded me so much of heaven and earth in dead men don't throw rice. i admit i had hoped she would go in another direction initially, but it's balanced out by her presence in the department, so she definitely has more going for her than "just" fraser-crushing. her dynamic with welsh is gold, she cannot be yelled at at this point, she's welsh's odd youngest child vibe, ray is going to feel some kinda way about her potentially joining the force, and i like that we've maintained a vecchio presence (outside of the ghost presence) in the story. as for the crush itself, was chatting at one point about how it's interesting in that it brings out certain moments in fraser that break through some of the ice/facade he's got going on by just plain annoying him (very little sister of your best friend vibes). he rolls his eyes at one point, i was like oh hello fraser, i spy your emotions, even though they're microdosed (similar to the hypnosis gag) also when she calls him in dead men i really was thinking about how frannie often hits on a truth without quite coming at it from the "right" angle. yeah this man is hiding. not his emotions for her but he is hiding. but yeah, i adore frannie, i think she's a wonderful character for many reasons that deserve their own post

rest of ensemble: welsh and huey, obviously great. also huey's had something of a whole arc across all four seasons. he started out not liking fraser (as an extension of ray), but a part of that was definitely louis' influence, out of the two of them he was always more level-headed and seemed pretty happy to put down the hatchet bit by bit, and then ofc louis' was murdered and we got to see him be quite affected + on his own for most of the season (in the background but still!) and his new partner is kind of a dick! which is something to mull over. ALSO WHEN HE SAID FRASER IS SUPERMAN I 😭😭😭 HE REALLY HAS SEEN ALL OF THAT AND THE IDEA OF FRASER DYING WOULD HURT

i miss elaine, it's a shame she was written off but hey, she didn't die so that is a Win, i can always imagine her. overall a strong station, but i do think sans gardino and elaine there's not much of the rest of the precinct that sticks much with me beyond the old favourites (there's the recurring gag with that one police woman on the phone and that's fine, but she's not a character as such). on the flipside there is the aforementioned bigger focus on welsh through his relationship with frannie in particular, but also just a Softening of him (that was always kinda there but is now like. There). so. things to think about. what this all Means -- it Does work, i do enjoy, it makes me think about... some things. that i havent quite formulated yet

having a looooooooooooot of thoughts (as im sure you've seen) about fable!fraser (superhero, fairytale fraser) and getting hurt and lying and getting dirtied -- and the first two are things he has done before, but i think it's that last one that matters. the manner in which hurt and lying happen and how he's affected (like you say in your other post about the episode with LadyShoes, the reasoning for things, the idea of "ends justify means" rather than the sorts of ways he's played with "truth" before which has usually had more to do with others' assumptions + omission + bending things to make everyone happy... things like that. this was 1. him realising he put two men's lives in danger deliberately, consciously, directly, and then 2. him... I think "stringing along" is a bit harsh, but it's in that realm of things, but playing her game for sure, and (i think) being more callous about that than he likes, again, to reach an end... many deeper thoughts about that, deserves a whole post, but i think ive gotta see where the story ends first

ALSO YEAH HUEY FUcKN KNOWS THAT FRASER'S NOT TELLIN THE WHOLE TRUTH/IS PLAYING A PART HERE!!!! this goes back to an oft-asked question by me these seasons, which is how little ray kowalski actually knows about fraser, because this fraser (the s3-onwards fraser) withholds a lot, and how i feel like that's the journey their dynamic is on right now, is ray kowalski seeing more and more of fraser bleeding through and being... concerned... somewhat. this man needs to stop jumping out of windows and "faux" dying for the cause..... but again, something that'll be clearer upon rewatch

WE DIIIID SEE THE LOcATION REUSE YES!!!! I didn't so much, GJ sees these things better than I do 😂 but once it was pointed out, yes

it alllll comes back to what sort of fairytale this ultimately is!

and i get to watch episode six as well. as a treat!

rayk telling him not to jump outta the window and he was right

fraser hurt himself... and he's still hobbling

lila!!!! from angel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and she has a neat lil dog

[catgirljaneway]

everytime i see something about tuvix i am filled with inhumane rage ngl

[avdaciter]

               If anything, Jinwoo deserved a good beating.   Hansa was being far too kind to him… and he wasn’t going to take it for granted. Talking about Inji had never been easy since her death. The werewolf could count on the fingers of his hands the amount of times he spoke to Leo about his mother, and it was probably because the wolf cub deserved to know how much of a great woman his mother was. He remembered the first time Leo asked about her–he also remembered how he couldn’t stop crying for the next couple of days.

Letting out a sigh, he ran his fingers through his hair. Here she was, open to listen to him, ready to welcome him and his baggage and Linus was running away like a coward. Like he’d always been.

“It’s–hard.” He said, looking down at his feet, before forcing his gaze to find hers again. “Talking about her.” Hansa needed to know that none of this was on her. None of this had ever been her fault. He was the one who couldn’t even grieve properly and who was dragging this goodbye for the last four years, but Inji had been everything he’d ever known once. Everything he’s ever loved. How do you say goodbye to that? “It’s–been four years. Four years and I still can’t talk about her without feeling like my chest is going to get crushed with pain.” Surely, this wasn’t how Hansa had planned to spend her Lunar Year, but it wasn’t how Jinwoo had planned to spend his either. “I’m scared that if I start talking about her, then I’ll start crying and then I’ll never stop.” He confessed, trying to find sense in his own, confusing thoughts. It was uncomfortable thinking about the fact that his love died because of him. 

Jinwoo could sense the hesitation, the fear hovering in the air and for the first time, he understood that during all of those months he’d been picking up on fear emanating from the gorgon, it might not have been directed at him. Clearing his throat, Jinwoo took a step closer to her. Things had been so good just moments ago, why did he have to let his past come forth and ruin everything? “Hansa, listen…” Another step closer and the older werewolf reached up to touch her face again—not without a split second of hesitation, as if asking for permission to touch her again before doing so. “I… I’m sorry.” He ducked his head while cupping her face with both hands, his gaze searching for any sign in her eyes that she would ever forgive him.

Apologies, Linus had learned, were good for nothing. Once you broke someone’s trust, you could still apologize, but things would never be the same. Hopefully, he would make a bigger effort to ensure he didn’t keep screwing things up around Hansa. “Honestly, I–I don’t know.” He started, choosing to be honest with her. Whether it was something she wanted to hear or not, at least he knew he was being honest. “Some days are easier than others." Pause. Honesty fucking hurt, man. "Some days, it’s hard to leave the bed without feeling like my chest is being crushed.” Because of how much he missed Inji. “So, I don’t know if I’m ready." And then, he was reminded of how he felt when he saw her smiling about the apron. Or when Leo would laugh in her presence. He remembered how her nose would wrinkle at his commands in the kitchen. "But–when I’m with you, it’s different.” He continued, fingers brushing against her cheeks, tracing gentle lines on her face, before his thumb brushed along her bottom lip. “When I’m with you it’s… easier to breathe.” Pause. His gaze lowered to her lips, too. “It has been for a while.”

Jinwoo moved closer, now fully stepping into her personal space. One of his hands remained caressing her bottom lip, while the other gently brushed the remains of tears away from her face. “I don’t want to make you cry, Hansa.” His voice was as soft as a whisper and he leaned in to press a gentle kiss between her eyes. “But I can’t answer your question.” Pulling away for a bit, he continued looking into her eyes. “I don’t know if it’s too soon for me.” Linus then, took one of her hand, moving it to rest on his shoulder. “But I do know how I feel when I’m with you." Again, he leaned in, resting his forehead against hers. "I can’t tell you some days won’t be hard for me. I can’t tell you it’ll be easy to talk about her… but… I want to try. With you.” The tips of his nose brushed against hers, lips dangerously close to hers once more without touching.

her smile grows. linus was defending his words again, not easily picking up on the gorgon's pokes and teasing. it just makes her laugh a little more, turning her head to search for him. ❝ don't worry, i need it simplified. i'm not exactly a natural. �� she hoped her words would ease him. she hoped, eventually, he'd see that she couldn't resist a little teasing. it was easy to hide emotions behind a wall of sarcasm and jokes, but maybe she'd gotten a little used to it.

while he started to cut everything, hansa let's herself sit, despite wanting to return his gestures with ones of her own. but being touchy while he's holding a knife seems like a bad idea. instead, she just watches, listens, talks from where she sits, just enjoying being there.

everything perks when linus speaks again, bringing up leo's mother. a subject hansa hasn't touched because it seemed far too personal. but the little snippet she was getting was something. even if it did make linus look incredibly uncomfortable. ❝ my mom is the more traditional one also, ❞ she says with a gentle smile, trying to find some commonality. trying to tell him it was okay. but she's not so great with words either. many words never really needed to exist between the two before so she rises with the intention of reaching out, letting him know she was there in some way. did he ever talk about her? did he ever let anything out besides on full moon nights? hansa didn't think so. but she never gets the chance to try and soothe whatever emotions plague the wolf. he excuses himself after their growing silence and then leaves.

hansa, too, wants to leave. she wishes she could be so careless, but it's not linus that makes her stay. he could make up an excuse to leo, tell him hansa got sick or something and that's why she had to go. but she wouldn't want that. instead, she stands there for a moment, that feeling of safety being dragged out along with linus. now her mind was back to second guessing, to wanting to protect itself. fight or flight. running had always been her personal choice. tears sting the gorgon's eyes, but she fights them back, scolding herself for letting them appear in the first place. she goes to the bathroom, fixing her loose bun into a tighter one and uses her phone to make sure there's no redness in her eyes, no hints. and after making sure her emotions were back where they belonged, hidden deep underneath her surface, she could go back out to the kitchen and wait.

her eyes are wide when finally met with his again, but hansa mentally kicks herself and they narrow. she forces the emotion to leave them, reinforcing that wall she was trying to put back up. even when she lays eyes on the vinyl, something that's usually a sure way to bring excitement out of her, doesn't react, only listens.

everything linus said just made her feel more confused. he was still mourning ... but wanted this? whatever the hell this was. and he was rusty? that didn't really feel true. probably the most confusing part of all because nothing felt ... rusty. it felt shiny and sparkly. they were sparkly. at least until they were suddenly dulled. all of hansa's words seemed to leave her, unsure what to say. her head, of course, told her to protect herself, keep up with the aloofness now. but her stupid heart hadn't changed. it wasn't like she would fall out of love with him instantaneously. and somehow it was louder than her head. it was so loud.

she takes the vinyl but doesn't open it, instead just sets it aside after a quiet thanks. ❝ you could have told me that, ❞ she finally finds her voice after another moment of quiet between the two. ❝ you can tell me anything. about her. about you two. about what happened. ❞ if she didn't ache, she'd reach for him. she'd take his hands to make him feel tethered to something, to let him know she was there. but they're preoccupied, not so much crossed over her chest as they are slightly hugging herself, protectively. ❝ but just don't ... please don't ever just walk away from me like that. ❞

she's not sure when she gave her face permission to express emotion, but she feels two little tears slip out the corner of her eyes and she groans in frustration, quickly removing them from her face and turning slightly, an attempt to hide. and then a thought pops into her mind. one she's scared to voice because his response, but one necessary for her own peace of mind. ❝ and if it's too soon for you, tell me now. ❞ she didn't want to be stand in in someone else's life, like she was feeling in that moment.

[djsangos]

//happy (early) birthday to meeeeeee look who i found at my local heb

...except he honestly kind of sucks to pose so i put him back in the box to display above my window and i immediately felt like the evil collector guy from toy story i'm so sorry naruto but for the 20 bucks i paid for you, i got what i paid for