#and this one actually made me cry more than all the others
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gffa · 3 days ago
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*walks back into BATFAMILY fic fandom eleven months later, holding a Starbucks cup* I'm right on time, I don't know what you mean. AND I have returned with the fruits of a fandom that continues to be incredible at providing the good stuff! Sometimes it's still hard for me to grasp just how much fic has exploded onto the scene in the 10+ years I was away from DC, that there was some incredible fic back when I was into the fandom, but coming back to actual mountains of it has continued to blow my mind every time and made me love these characters even more than I already did.
It's almost overwhelming, honestly, how much good fic there is to read, so let me scream at you guys and shove links at you because I'm having a great time here and I want to drag all of you into it with me, COME HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT RIDICULOUSLY DRESSED SUPERHERO COMICS WITH ME, it's all fun and games, I swear! (Okay, but at least you'll have a good time crying about the Bats, I can give you that much at least.)
BATFAM FIC RECS - BABY DICK IS THE CUTEST GREMLIN ROBIN I'M NOT HEARING ANY ARGUMENTS: ✦ sleepless, perfect duty by glassofwater, dick & bruce, 4.3k     The choice to forgo sleep, to forgo Dick Grayson, has never been easier. Not when the other option is Robin. ✦ Parallels in Reverse by rosetteanon, dick & damian & bruce, time travel, 2.2k     Damian travels to a dimension that's a little bit behind his own. There, he meets a younger Dick Grayson, and a happier Bruce Wayne. ✦ string theory by wingdingery, dick & bruce & damian, time travel, 8k     When Bruce and Dick get transported to an unfamiliar Gotham, it only takes running into a different Batman and Robin for Bruce to realize two things: one, they’re in the future; and two—in the future, Dick Grayson is dead. ✦ Rooftop Meetings by orphan_account, dick & bruce & leslie & shrike & cast, 10.2k wip     When Two-Face almost beats a newly minted Robin to death, Bruce decides that the life of a vigilante is too dangerous for a kid. This becomes the catalyst for a series of events that leads twelve-year-old Dick Grayson down a darker path. ✦ It Could Stay This Simple (Just Stay This Little) by coconuticecream (magspie), dick & bruce, 3k     Maybe claiming legal guardianship over a child at 22, and so soon after becoming Batman, spread Bruce thinner than he'd realized. Maybe Bruce was less equipped to parent a third grader than he'd thought. Maybe Bruce should do more to invite Dick into his life. Maybe Bruce should hug Dick, or promise he'll do better by Dick, or tell Dick that he loves Dick more than he thought himself capable. (or: bruce and dick practice self care together.) ✦ No One Said Flying Was Easy by Wrtrmd2, dick & bruce & alfred, 51.1k     Eight year old Richard Grayson has just watched his parents fall to their deaths. Hurting and alone, he struggles to adjust to the new life he's thrown into. Bruce Wayne takes him in, but seems to have no idea what he's doing. Can they help each other put the pieces of their broken lives back together?
✦ Zitka by PechoraFlow, dick & bruce, 2.7k     After Dick's parents fall to their deaths, he is left clinging to the few things he has left: one of them being Zitka, his stuffed elephant. ✦ your heart is the only place that i call home by emavee, dick & bruce, talon!dick, 6.3k     There shouldn’t be any Talons that are this small, this young, but there’s one standing right in front of him. And that shouldn’t be Bruce’s soulmark blooming on his too-pale skin, but it is—there’s nothing else it could be. Batman really should know better than to bring a Talon home with him, but here he is, wrapping up the boy in a set of meta-cuffs and tucking him into the backseat of the car. ✦ Hostage by EternalLife, dick & bruce & alfred, 3.9k     Dick Grayson is 10 years old. Batman is nowhere to be seen, and Robin has a gun to his head. ✦ The Mother-Son Dance by cometoastop, bruce & dick, 1.8k     Dick is upset he doesn’t have a mother to bring him to his school’s mother-son dance, so Bruce offers to bring him instead.
BATFAM FIC RECS - ADULT BATSON AND BATDAD ARE MY KRYPTONITE, I FOLD LIKE WET CARDBOARD FOR THEM: ✦ Permission To Pause by farawayfiction (JJ_Thomas), dick & bruce, 1.9k     Bruce pulled the phone from his pocket. A text from Dick was waiting for him on the notification screen. ✦ oathbreaker by one_step_closer_to_death, dick & bruce & cast, 2.3k     Stranded and on his last leg, Batman might be fighting his last battle yet. But Bruce promised he was coming back home and this was one promise he wasn't going to break yet. ✦ Judge and Juror by CamsthiSky, dick & bruce & alfred, 6.6k     Anonymous asked: I was just wondering if you would like to write a story set during bvs and how Nightwing could be involved there? ✦ When You Don't Have an Umbrella by TheSilencer, dick & bruce, read the tags, 1.2k     Dick Grayson and Batman talk about the rain. Except they're not actually talking about the rain. ✦ riding the blues by TheResurrectionist, dick & bruce & oc, 3.9k     “What’s in there, anyway?” Charles asked, rolling down the window. “Looks heavy.” “A few million dollars' worth of electroshock weapons,” the kid said, dead-serious. After a moment, a grin stretched across his face. “Nah, I’m just fucking with you. It’s old clothes, mostly.” ✦ Lexically Homeless by nighhtwing (divineauthor), dick & bruce, 1.1k     Dick, Bruce, and their relationship with language and each other.
BATFAM FIC RECS - EVERYBODY LOVES DICK: ✦ One, Two, Buckle My Shoe by sElkieNight60, dick & jason & tim & damian & bruce & alfred, de-aged!dick, 17k wip     Dick was twenty-eight. The boy in the mirror most certainly was not. ✦ Weight of Judgment by Dragonbat, dick & bruce & alfred, 1.6k     As leader of the Teen Titans, Dick had to make a difficult decision. Now he's dealing with the fallout. ✦ Robins, titmice, and other spring birds by Fleur_de_Violette, dick & jason & bruce, 8.5k     There are a lot of things Jason doesn’t understand in the dynamic of the Wayne manor, despite being here for nine months. Maybe a rescue turning a little more dangerous than it should have been for Robin will help him see things clearly? ✦ bachelor parties of different sorts by cedarcat, dick & jason & barbara & cass & bruce (& background dick/babs), read the tags, 4.4k     Dick and Barbara are engaged. There's just one complicating factor that Dick has to deal with. He'd rather avoid it. aka: the one where dick handles past trauma poorly, finds the support he needs in his family, and comes out better for it. ✦ Kitchen Talk by Smitty, dick & alfred, 3.1k     Dick Grayson gets some good advice in the hours before Nightwing #45. ✦ Teach Me to Dream by CamsthiSky, dick & bruce & alfred & leslie & cast, time travel, 29k wip     Dick’s eleven. Not thirteen and eager to prove himself. Not seventeen and mourning a brother. Not nineteen and wishing his best friend wasn’t dead and Bruce would look him in the eyes. He’s only eleven. So why does he remember all of that? ✦ like the back of my hand by Jo_B, dick & bruce & conner & dick/babs, 2k     “Cut it out.” “Would you stay still, please?” Dick swats Bruce’s hand away and starts pushing himself up. “Y’know, in the wild, bats eat their kids.” “That’s not even a little bit true and you know it.” ✦ idea man by vaporeon_ninja, dick & bruce & jason & damian, 8.3k     Ask him. As if it were that easy. As if Damian hasn’t only just barely begun to respect him, and would immediately burn all the ground they’ve covered if Dick so much as implied he wanted to help him get through something. Yeah, fat chance. No, Dick can’t ask him. But he can’t just keep doing nothing, either. So he decides on a third option- just start trying anything. ✦ One of His Own by DawnsEternalLight, dick & bruce & damian & alfred, 1.3k     Dick's freshly back from Spyral and apartment hunting. Little Does he know his dad has already got that covered. ✦ Now That's a Lot of Damage by Sanctioned_Chaos, dick & bruce & jason & tim & cass & cast, 5k wip     On a joint operation with the Justice League, Dick's family falls victim to a particularly malignant curse and he's the only one who can free them. Consequently, it makes him the subject of their suffering.
BATFAM FIC RECS - JASON TODD IS AN ASSHOLE CAT, I'M GONNA THROW HIM AT DICK BECAUSE IT'S FUNNY (AND MAYBE SOME OF HIS OTHER SIBLINGS TOO): ✦ All the Roofs of Uncertainty by Kieron_ODuibhir, dick & jason & bruce & leslie & cast, 70k     For all the blood on his hands, Red Hood was never just a villain. And Nightwing never gives up on family, not for good. (Or: The one where Dick bleeds a lot and Jason argues with everybody.) ✦ Red In My Ledger by WordsAblaze, dick & jason, 1.1k     day five, where jason realises a little too late that dick isn’t an intruder breaking into his safehouse... ✦ Fixed Points and Fluxes by i_am_the_imposter_syndrome, dick & jason (& bruce), 16.5k wip     When a mission involving a mysterious sorcerer goes wrong, Dick and Jason find themselves out of time and place in a Gotham that’s not quite their own. Protocol dictates they lie low and avoid unnecessary interactions as much as possible until they can get home, but their family here is fractured, and if there’s one thing that’s constant across universes, it’s that Bats have each other’s backs. ✦ Too Close to Call by Dragonbat, dick & jason & bruce, 5.8k     Summary: Things go horribly wrong when Robin thinks he can bring in Two-Face by himself. Now Nightwing’s life is on the line and one bad decision might spell disaster!
BATFAM FIC RECS - DICK AND DAMIAN WERE THE BEST BATMAN & ROBIN, I'M NOT HEARING ARGUMENTS ABOUT THAT EITHER: ✦ Won't You Stay A While? by fishfingersandjellybabies, dick & damian & tim, 2.8k     Ric did not expect to find a child sitting on the hood of his cab. Damian did expect to get his brother back. ✦ The Universe Doesn’t Get to Take This by fishfingersandjellybabies, dick & damian & bruce, 1.9k     “And they’re so important that you don’t come home to check on your recently un-amnesiac brother? And here, I thought I was your favorite.” ✦ Just a Little TLC by fishfingersandjellybabies, dick & damian, 1.7k     Dick was not sick. Really. He was fine. Fine!
BATFAM FIC RECS - BATKIDS ALL HAVE MANY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE ALL PETTY ASSHOLES AND/OR WONDERFUL BABIES AND I LOVE THEM WITH MY WHOLE BEING: ✦ The Long Way Home by itsnatalie, jason & tim & bruce & dick & damian & cast, 111.6k     With Jason tentatively back in the Batfamily, things are going pretty well for him--except for the whole thing with Tim. But who gives a shit about Tim Drake? But when Jason and Tim are pulled into a frightening race for their lives inside a labyrinth that's out to kill them, they may have to look past their differences just to stay alive. Maybe along the way, they'll discover they aren't as different as they thought, and family comes in many different forms. ✦ IRIS Log #1548 by deadchannelradio, jason & cass & barbara & bruce & steph & tim & damian & roy & dick, 8.5k     A Disclaimer From Your Friendly Neighborhood Oracle: The following is a transcript of Patrol Communications Audio written by state of the art transcription technology, IRIS (Interpretation of Recorded Intelligence Software). IRIS was created to provide easily searchable records, automatically, and eliminate the need to transcribe each patrol audio log manually. That being said, IRIS is still experimental, and may not always be entirely accurate. ✦ Real Housewives (sort of) of Gotham by brandywine421, dick & selina & bruce & damian & jason & roy & talia & dinah & harley/ivy & helena & cast, no powers au, 5.9k     Selina is curious to a fault but she has a twinge of concern at her almost-stepson's name popping up on her personal line. They were allies and frenemies, depending on who was Brucie's favorite pet at the moment but he usually texts birthday wishes and xoxo's instead of actual voice contact. "Is everyone okay?" ✦ War! by Smitty, dick & barbara & tim & cast, 1.9k     What 'entertainment' was Nightwing talking about in Nightwing #44? Innuendo. ✦ Nowhere Safer by lurkinglurkerwholurks, dick & jason & tim & bruce, 9.6k     What's a Robin to do when the nightmares don't stop? ✦ Love like Cats by Laroyena, alfred & bruce & dick & jason & julia & cast, 20.7k     “This takes crazy cat people to a whole new level,” his old friend told him. “So this old family your dad took care of, they left their fortune to a cat.” Alfred Pennyworth, ex-special agent of the British Secret Intelligence Service, moves to America to become a butler. A cat butler. ✦ Minimum Height Requirement by Drag0nst0rm, bruce & dick & jason & tim & damian & cass & steph, 66.4k     Somewhere in the multiverse, there's a universe where letting his children dress up in capes and follow him into vigilantism seems like a good idea. Bruce is determined that it isn't going to be this one . . . Despite his children's repeated attempts to convince him otherwise. (Or: "When you're eighteen, you can do what you want. Until then, no capes.")
✦ Family Crisis by librarylexicon, bruce & dick & jason & tim & cass & steph & leslie & cast, 85.8k     At the close of the gang war, Batman uncovers an attempted deception concerning the life of his former protégé Stephanie Brown, and suddenly nothing is as important as his family. While Dick seeks absolution, Tim struggles with grief, Cassandra searches for belonging and Steph rebuilds her sense of self, Bruce faces the return of ghosts from his own past and psyche. (War Games AU) ✦ grasp of ice by Kieron_ODuibhir, tim & damian, 6k     “Drake.” The hand in his was cold. Not because it belonged to a corpse, but because the night was cold. Cold and bright and pitiless, fresh snow glittering perfect under the waning gibbous moon like diamond sand. “Drake. Stay awake.” Drake, because he was insane, smiled before he said, “I don’t want your pity, Robin.” ✦ The Salem Protocol by Dragonbat, bruce & dick & jason & tim & damian & barbara & jim & cast, 47.4k     An AU version of Batman, RIP. When the GCPD makes a surprising arrest, Gordon knows he needs to call in support. Contains MASSIVE spoilers for Batman #678.
BATFAM FIC RECS - I CUT MY TEETH ON DICK & TIM AS CLOSE BROTHERS AND NO ONE WILL NOT TAKE IT FROM ME: ✦ Hide and Seek by WordsAblaze, dick & tim, 1.1k     day twenty five, where a mission leaves dick and tim playing a not-so-fun version of hide and seek... ✦ To be a good brother by andthentheyweretwo, dick & tim (&tim/kon), 7.7k     It’s not always easy to be a good brother. Sometimes, it’s downright hard. ✦ Think Happy Thoughts by fanfictiongreenirises, dick & tim & bruce, 2.3k     Dick's vitals keep crashing if his thoughts turn downwards. Tim tries to help. ✦ Hisstamine by coyote_nebula, dick & tim, 2.7k     Dick gets bitten by a venomous snake. Tim pretends to know exactly what to do. ✦ Words That Must Be Said by Dragonbat, dick & tim, 1.4k     Tim needs Dick's advice when his long-lost uncle turns up.
BATFAM FIC RECS - DICK/BABS FOREVER AND YOU CAN SHUT IT IF YOU DISAGREE, THEY'RE ADORABLE TOGETHER: ✦ I'll crawl home (to her) by dizarys, dick & babs, ~1k     She needed to focus. She was Oracle and Oracle couldn’t falter or be distracted by personal feelings, not when multiple lives depended on her coordinating teams across the city, the country, the globe. There was no time to worry about Nightwing or his radio silence. Too much going on to pester him. He got out, said he wasn’t majorly wounded, and she needed to trust him. After all he was Nightwing. Vigilante since he was ten. Dick didn’t need her worrying in his ear while trying to stay alive. They needed to be professional because anything else could end in death. ✦ to my word now I'll be true by theragingstorm, dick/ babs, NSFW, 4.7k     A chance night becomes something more. ✦ Scar Tissue by Smitty, dick/babs, 2k     Some scars heal more easily than others. ✦ Time Enough by Smitty, dick/babs, 1k     Barbara asked him for time.
BATFAM FIC RECS - I WILL DIE ON THE HILL THAT TIM DRAKE'S TRUE LOVE INTEREST IS CONNER KENT AND NOBODY CAN STOP ME, NOT EVEN GOD: ✦ What a Hunk (Of Rock) by AelinSardothian, tim/kon & cast, 4.4k     Tim is pulling another all-nighter when an injured Kryptonian lands on his balcony, leaking blood and affection. ✦ Obligatory Nap Time by egg_thief, tim/kon, 2.6k     Tim hasn’t been sleeping lately. Kon’s determined to at least get him to take a nap ✦ GUY.exe by thebodydies, tim/kon, NSFW, 4.6k     “If you tell me what you want,” Conner said, “I’ll do the rest.”
BATFAM FIC RECS - TAKE THE ANGST DIAL, TURN IT UP TO ELEVEN, AND BREAK THE KNOB OFF, THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR: ✦ threadbare by inconstant_moon, dick & jason & tim & damian & bruce & donna & cast, read the tags, 53.8k wip     That's the thing. Dick looked right at the kid, broken hand and all, and nearly let him in. He nearly let him train. Because after all these years, he didn't process anything wrong with the image before him. (Dick, Bruce, and the implications of raising a partner instead of a child.) ✦ Kindness isn't Free by minnow_doodle_doo, bruce & dick & alfred, no powers au, 6.7k     “You need to love humanity unconditionally or else the world will beat you into the ground and you won’t be able to get back up again.” He said into Dick’s hand like a prayer. “And you can’t kill what you love and survive.” ✦ Home Assignment by librarylexicon, dick & bruce & tim & babs (some dick/babs), 6.8k     Blüdhaven police officer Dick Grayson is suffering the tail end of a nasty cough when he's summoned to work a stakeout as Nightwing with Batman and Robin in Gotham. As the night wears on, his worst fears are realised when three urgent pleas for help pull him in separate directions, forcing him to choose between members of his own family in a way that feels suspiciously intentional. ✦ How Sharp The Pieces Were (You Crumbled Into) by WinterSky101, dick & tim & damian & cass & bruce & alfred & steph & duke & cast, 14.9k wip     Dick is back, but scars like his don't heal easily, even with a new healing factor. (Thirteen stories of Dick and his family in the year after his return to Gotham.) ✦ Pain o' Chocolate by Anonymous, bruce & dick, 1k     Dick is in a coma.
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bratzkoo · 6 hours ago
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scheming heart | jeonghan
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Author: bratzkoo Pairing:  CFO! Jeonghan x Cardiologist! reader Genre: fluff, chaos Rating: PG-13 Word count: 7.4k~ Warnings/note: second fic for the new series i'm working on, first fic is offside (seungcheol's chaos) and now, we have jeonghan's part of the chaotic world.
summary: Jeonghan has finally found his match in that stubborn cardiologist not knowing that everything was orchestrated by his scheming grandmother in Suite 520.
taglist (hit me up if you wanna be added): @escoupseu , @yanabaaaaaaarysheva , @spnyin , @sousydive , @gyuguys , @gyubakeries
requests are open, but you can just say hi! | masterlist
The VIP suite of Seoul National University Hospital looked like a five-star hotel room had aggressively swallowed a medical facility. Amidst the designer furniture and medical equipment that probably cost more than most people's houses, Granny Han was doing what any respectable 75-year-old chaebol matriarch would do at 7 AM – scheming on her secret iPhone while pretending to be asleep.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥 [Members: Rich_Granny_Han, Nurse_Anna, Boo_CEO, Won_NOT_involved]
Rich_Granny_Han: Operation starts today! New cardiologist incoming! Boo_CEO: OMG YES! Is she pretty? Smart? Ready to handle our dramatic boy? Rich_Granny_Han: Harvard graduate. Young. Scary. Boo_CEO: PERFECT FOR JEONGHAN 😍 Won_NOT_involved: I'm a senior nurse. I don't do matchmaking. Rich_Granny_Han: Sure, dear. BTW I saw you setting up that hidden camera 😘 Won_NOT_involved: ...that's for medical documentation. Nurse_Anna: Babe, we all know you're lying 😂 Won_NOT_involved: I'm turning off my phone. Rich_Granny_Han: No you're not 💅
The door opened, and Granny quickly shoved her phone under her designer hospital blanket (yes, she brought her own, the hospital ones were "peasant fabric").
"Good morning, Halmoni!" Anna breezed in, looking suspiciously cheerful for someone working hospital hours. "Ready for vitals?"
"Anna dear," Granny coughed delicately, a performance worthy of a Best Actress nomination. "Tell me about this new doctor."
"Dr. Y/N," Anna checked the blood pressure monitor while simultaneously texting the group chat behind her back – a skill developed specifically for this job. "Brilliant, scary when caffeine-deprived, and apparently made a chaebol's son cry during her fellowship."
"Perfect!" Granny's eyes gleamed. "Jeonghan needs someone who can handle him. That boy thinks being CFO means Chief Fashion Officer."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: ALERT! Target sighted in parking lot. Three cups of coffee. Dark circles. Optimal chaos conditions! Boo_CEO: On my way with premium bubble tea and emotional support! Won_NOT_involved: Don't you have a company to run? Boo_CEO: Bold of you to assume I do actual work Rich_Granny_Han: Everyone in position! Anna, increase heart monitor sensitivity! Won_NOT_involved: That's against protocol... Rich_Granny_Han: I'll add another zero to your Christmas bonus Won_NOT_involved: ...sensitivity increased.
Dr. Y/N strode down the hallway, white coat pristine despite the early hour. As the attending cardiologist, she'd already reviewed several cases since 6 AM. Her coffee consumption was legendary among the cardiology department – not because she was a fresh graduate (she wasn't), but because dealing with entitled family members required chemical assistance.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: Target acquired! Our cardiologist looks ready to destroy rich people today Boo_CEO: Jeonghan needs that energy in his life tbh Won_NOT_involved: Shouldn't you be checking on your other patients? Nurse_Anna: Babe, this IS patient care. Emotional patient care. Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo dear, go check my IV drip Won_NOT_involved: It's perfectly fine... Rich_Granny_Han: That wasn't a suggestion 😊 Won_NOT_involved: ...checking IV drip now.
Y/N entered Suite 520 to find what looked like a carefully orchestrated scene: Granny Han propped up regally against designer pillows, Anna adjusting monitors with suspicious enthusiasm, and Wonwoo dutifully checking IV lines while pretending not to notice Anna's not-so-subtle winks.
"Good morning, Mrs. Han. I'm Dr. Y/N, your attending cardiologist."
"Please, call me Halmoni," Granny's voice was perfectly pitched between frail and commanding. "Everyone does. Even Wonwoo here, and he tries so hard to be professional."
Wonwoo, caught in the crossfire, focused intently on the IV drip.
The morning assessment went smoothly – suspiciously so. Y/N reviewed Granny's cardiac status while fielding questions that seemed oddly personal for a medical consultation: "Are you married, doctor?" "Do you like coffee? My grandson LOVES coffee." "What's your opinion on dramatic men in expensive suits?"
By 2 PM, all hell broke loose.
The suite's door flew open with theatrical force. Wonwoo, who had been checking Granny's vitals, nearly jumped out of his skin – though whether from the noise or Anna's excited squeal was unclear.
Enter Han Jeonghan, looking like he'd walked off a magazine cover. His Armani suit probably cost more than most nurses' monthly salary – a fact Wonwoo noted with an eye-roll so powerful it could have registered on the cardiac monitor.
"Who," Jeonghan demanded, brandishing his phone, "changed my grandmother's medication without consulting the family?"
Y/N, who had spent years dealing with entitled relatives, simply raised an eyebrow. "I did. Because I'm her doctor, and unlike WebMD, I actually went to medical school."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: OMGOMGOMG IT'S HAPPENING Boo_CEO: The TENSION! The DRAMA! Won_NOT_involved: I'm literally just trying to do my job here Rich_Granny_Han: Time for my award-winning performance! Won_NOT_involved: Please don't mess with the monitors again... Rich_Granny_Han: Too late! Nurse_Anna: Babe just enjoy the show Won_NOT_involved: I still have other patients Rich_Granny_Han: Shush, love is happening Won_NOT_involved: That's not how nursing works... Rich_Granny_Han: It is in Suite 520 😘
The cardiac monitor suddenly started beeping. Wonwoo shot Granny a look that clearly said "I know what you did," but professionally checked the readings anyway.
"Oh dear," Granny fluttered a hand over her heart. "All this tension... it's affecting my poor heart..."
Y/N and Jeonghan immediately stopped arguing, their professional and filial instincts kicking in respectively.
"Blood pressure's a bit elevated," Wonwoo reported dutifully, while Anna practically vibrated with excitement beside him.
"Maybe," Y/N suggested dryly, "certain people could be less dramatic during your recovery period."
"Maybe," Jeonghan countered, "certain doctors could be more communicative about medical decisions."
The monitor beeped again.
"Children, please," Granny's voice was weak but somehow carried perfect emotional manipulation. "Wonwoo, be a dear and get me some water? And Anna, I need my pills... the ones in the far cabinet..."
Both nurses recognized a dismissal when they heard one. As they left (Anna practically dragging Wonwoo), their phones buzzed:
Rich_Granny_Han: Mission proceeding perfectly! Phase 1 complete! Nurse_Anna: They're so cute when they're angry! Boo_CEO: OMW with premium drama fuel (coffee)! Won_NOT_involved: Can we please just have one normal patient? Rich_Granny_Han: No ❤️
Left alone with the feuding doctor and CFO, Granny settled in to watch the show. Her "concerned grandmother" facade barely concealing her glee.
"Since you're so invested in your grandmother's care," Y/N's voice dripped with professional sarcasm, "let me explain the medication changes in terms even a CFO can understand."
Jeonghan's perfectly maintained eyebrow twitched. "Please do. Use small words for us non-Harvard graduates."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: The sexual tension! I can't breathe! Nurse_Anna: Should I come back with the oxygen? Rich_Granny_Han: No dear, that was metaphorical Won_NOT_involved: Thank god, the paperwork for unnecessary oxygen... Boo_CEO: INCOMING with reinforcements! And bubble tea! Rich_Granny_Han: Perfect timing!
The suite's door burst open again, revealing Seungkwan balancing a tray of expensive bubble tea and wearing a suit that rivaled Jeonghan's.
"Halmoni!" he sang out, then dramatically gasped at the scene before him. "Oh my, am I interrupting something?"
"Perfect timing, Seungkwan-ah," Granny's voice somehow conveyed both frailty and mischief. "Stay and help me understand the doctor's explanation. My old heart would feel better with more family present."
Y/N watched as her simple medical consultation turned into what felt like a business presentation, complete with:
One overdressed CFO pretending to take notes while actually googling medical terms
His equally overdressed best friend providing dramatic gasps as punctuation
Two nurses who kept finding excuses to check the monitors
And a grandmother whose "heart symptoms" seemed suspiciously tied to whenever her grandson and doctor moved closer together
"So," Y/N concluded her explanation, "any questions about the medication changes?"
"Just one," Jeonghan smiled his business smile. "Where did you get your coffee? You seem to run on it as much as I do."
Before Y/N could respond, three things happened simultaneously:
The cardiac monitor beeped enthusiastically
Seungkwan choked on his bubble tea
Anna materialized with a coffee menu from the hospital's premium cafe
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: CODE COFFEE! I repeat, CODE COFFEE! Boo_CEO: Their first potential coffee date! I'm crying 😭 Won_NOT_involved: This isn't what medical codes are for... Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo, go get me a cardiac reading Won_NOT_involved: Your heart is fine Rich_Granny_Han: Not for my heart, for the drama Won_NOT_involved: sigh
"Oh, speaking of coffee," Granny perked up with suspicious energy for someone supposedly weak, "Jeonghan-ah, that fancy machine you brought me is too complicated. Maybe Dr. Y/N could help you figure it out?"
Y/N looked at the state-of-the-art espresso machine in the corner – probably worth more than her monthly salary. Jeonghan was already moving toward it with the confidence of a man who thought knowing how to make coffee was a personality trait.
"I only drink americanos," Y/N stated firmly.
"What a coincidence," Seungkwan stage-whispered, "that's Jeonghan's favorite too!"
The monitor beeped again.
"That's it," Y/N turned to Wonwoo, "please check the monitor's sensitivity."
"Oh, it's very sensitive," Wonwoo muttered, then quickly added at Granny's sharp look, "I'll... run some tests."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Progress report!
Coffee connection established ✓
Mutual annoyance at peak levels ✓
Jeonghan fixed his hair 3 times ✓
Doctor checked her reflection in the monitor ✓ 
Boo_CEO: THE EXCELLENCE OF THIS PLOT Nurse_Anna: Should I accidentally spill something so they have to move closer? Won_NOT_involved: NO Rich_Granny_Han: Save that for tomorrow dear Won_NOT_involved: Why am I even reading this chat... Nurse_Anna: Because you love me 😘 Won_NOT_involved: Accurate. Always will be accurate. Rich_Granny_Han: Simp
"Dr. Y/N," Granny called out sweetly, "your afternoon must be busy. Why don't you take some coffee with you? Jeonghan makes excellent americanos."
"I'm quite capable of getting my own coffee, thank you," Y/N replied professionally.
"Are you?" Jeonghan smirked, already starting the machine. "Because that hospital cafe americano you're holding looks tragic."
Y/N looked at her cup, then at his perfectly pressed suit, then at her patient charts. Pride warred with caffeine addiction.
Caffeine won.
"Fine. One coffee. Purely for professional courtesy."
"Of course," Jeonghan's smile was far too satisfied. "Professional courtesy."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: DAY ONE SUCCESS! Nurse_Anna: They're so cute I'm gonna cry Boo_CEO: Already planning the wedding Won_NOT_involved: It's literally just coffee Rich_Granny_Han: Oh sweet summer child Nurse_Anna: Babe, you're so innocent Won_NOT_involved: I hate this family Rich_Granny_Han: No you don't Won_NOT_involved: No, I don't, but I want it noted that I complained and I love Anna, I want it highlighted in the note that I love Anna. Nurse_Anna: I love you! Rich_Granny_Han: This is a Jeonghan fic.
As Y/N left with her admittedly perfect americano, Granny Han settled back against her pillows with a satisfied smile. Phase one was complete. Tomorrow, they'd begin Code: "Accidental Touch."
Poor Y/N and Jeonghan had no idea what they were in for.
- Y/N arrived at the hospital the next morning to find a paper cup from an expensive coffee shop sitting on her office desk. Next to it was a note in pretentiously perfect handwriting:
"Since your taste in coffee is as questionable as your medication choices. - JH"
She crumpled the note, then uncrumpled it, then took a sip of the coffee.
Damn. It was perfect.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: COFFEE SPOTTED! Code: Caffeine Love is go! Rich_Granny_Han: Did she drink it?? Nurse_Anna: She tried to look angry but I saw her save the note Boo_CEO: THE ROMANCE Won_NOT_involved: He's basically saying her medical decisions suck Rich_Granny_Han: That's flirting for rich boys, dear Won_NOT_involved: That's terrible Rich_Granny_Han: That's why he’s single
Suite 520 was suspiciously quiet when Y/N entered for morning rounds. Granny was reading what appeared to be a medical textbook – upside down. Anna was "organizing supplies" while obviously watching the door.
"Good morning, Dr. Y/N!" Granny brightened. "Oh my, is that coffee from Angel-in-us? Jeonghan loves that cafe—"
"Your ECG results, Mrs. Han," Y/N interrupted professionally.
The suite's door opened, and Jeonghan walked in wearing a different devastatingly expensive suit. He paused at seeing Y/N with his coffee cup.
"I see you've upgraded your taste," he smirked.
"The coffee's acceptable. Your medical opinions still aren't."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: THEY'RE FLIRTING THROUGH COFFEE Nurse_Anna: The tension is ART Rich_Granny_Han: Time for some chest pain I think Won_NOT_involved: Please don't Rich_Granny_Han: Too late, clutching chest dramatically now Won_NOT_involved: That's not how heart problems work... Rich_Granny_Han: Watch and learn, child
"Oh!" Granny pressed a hand to her chest. "Such tension... my heart..."
Y/N and Jeonghan both stepped forward, accidentally bumping into each other. Anna dropped a tray with perfect timing.
"Mrs. Han," Y/N began.
"Halmoni," Granny corrected weakly. "You're practically family now that you're sharing coffee with Jeonghan."
Jeonghan choked. Y/N's professional mask cracked slightly.
Later that afternoon, Y/N was reviewing charts when her office door burst open. Jeonghan stood there, waving his phone.
"Your afternoon consult notes say Halmoni's tired," he accused.
"That's generally what 'fatigue' means in medical terms, yes."
"She's never tired. She once conducted a 12-hour board meeting from a yoga headstand."
Y/N pinched the bridge of her nose. "Mr. Han—"
"Jeonghan."
"Mr. Han," she emphasized, "normal people get tired. Even chaebol grandmothers."
"She's not normal people. She's—" He paused, noticing her empty coffee cup. "You finished the coffee."
"That's not medically relevant."
"I'll bring you another tomorrow."
"Are you trying to bribe your grandmother's doctor?"
"Is it working?"
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: EMERGENCY! They're alone in her office!! Boo_CEO: WHERE ARE THE CAMERAS Rich_Granny_Han: Anna dear, perhaps Dr. Y/N needs some test results? Won_NOT_involved: We don't have any test results Rich_Granny_Han: Then make some Won_NOT_involved: That's literally fraud Rich_Granny_Han: That's literally romance Nurse_Anna: OMW with fake papers! Won_NOT_involved: That's fine, go do your thing babe!
The door flew open again, revealing Anna with a stack of papers. "Dr. Y/N! The results you needed!"
"I didn't order any—"
"Oh look," Anna squinted at the papers, "Mrs. Han's... everything... needs discussing. Right now. With family present."
Y/N looked at the "results". They were coffee-stained printouts of WebMD articles.
Evening rounds found Y/N entering Suite 520 to an unusual scene:
Granny "sleeping" while obviously filming on her phone
Seungkwan pretending to read a magazine (upside down)
Anna adjusting already-perfect monitors
Wonwoo looking like he wanted to transfer departments
And Jeonghan, attempting to understand her morning notes
"That's not how you read an ECG," she said from the doorway.
Jeonghan didn't look up. "I downloaded a medical app."
"WebMD doesn't count."
"This is a different medical app."
"Is it also WebMD in a trench coat?"
A laugh escaped before he could stop it. Y/N pretended not to notice how it transformed his face.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: HE LAUGHED! REAL LAUGH! NOT BUSINESS LAUGH! Boo_CEO: FIRST GENUINE LAUGH IN 84 YEARS Nurse_Anna: They're so cuuuuute Won_NOT_involved: He's still questioning her medical expertise Rich_Granny_Han: Yes but fondly now Nurse_Anna: Babe that's progress Won_NOT_involved: Your standards are concerning Rich_Granny_Han: Shush and help me plan tomorrow's heart episode
Granny "woke up" with perfect timing. "Doctor, since you're teaching Jeonghan medical terms, perhaps over coffee—"
"No," they said simultaneously.
"The heart wants what it wants," Granny sighed dramatically.
The monitor beeped.
"That's it," Y/N turned to Wonwoo, "please check the monitor's sensitivity again."
"It's working exactly as intended," he muttered, then added louder at Granny's look, "I mean, yes, doctor, right away."
As Y/N left for the night, she found another coffee cup on the nurses' station.
The note read: "For your overnight studies on how to be less scary to your patients. - JH"
She definitely didn't smile. And if she did, no one could prove it.
Except maybe the CCTV footage Wonwoo was pretending not to save for Anna’s enjoyment.
- Late that night, Y/N was finishing her paperwork when she decided to check on Granny one last time. It definitely had nothing to do with the possibility of running into a certain annoying CFO.
She found Suite 520's lights dimmed, but not dark. Jeonghan was there, suit jacket off, sleeves rolled up, squinting at a medical textbook like it had personally offended him.
"That's upside down," she said from the doorway.
He didn't even flinch. "I'm teaching myself to read medical terms in all directions. Very professional."
"Is that what CFOs do in their spare time?"
"Only the dashingly handsome ones."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: NIGHT SHIFT ALERT! They're alone! Boo_CEO: At this hour??? SCANDALOUS Rich_Granny_Han: pretending to sleep but recording everything Won_NOT_involved: Isn't anyone concerned about patient privacy? Rich_Granny_Han: Privacy is for people who aren't trying to get grandchildren Nurse_Anna: LMAO GRANNY Won_NOT_involved: I'm reporting this chat to HR Rich_Granny_Han: I own HR, dear. Keep up!
"Your grandmother's readings are stable," Y/N said professionally, checking the monitors. "Though someone keeps adjusting the sensitivity."
"Shocking," Jeonghan deadpanned, watching her work. "Almost as shocking as you being here at," he checked his Cartier watch, "11 PM?"
"I'm dedicated to my patients."
"Just my grandmother, or do you check on everyone this late?"
"Are you implying something, Mr. Han?"
"Jeonghan," he corrected. "And I'm implying you might be as obsessed with my grandmother as I am. It's okay, she has that effect on people."
From the bed, Granny let out a very fake snore.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: The snore was too much wasn't it Boo_CEO: Oscar worthy, Halmoni! Nurse_Anna: Should I create an emergency? Won_NOT_involved: NO Rich_Granny_Han: Save the emergencies for tomorrow Won_NOT_involved: Why are all of you like this? Nurse_Anna: Because we're invested in love Won_NOT_involved: We're invested in medical care Rich_Granny_Han: Why not both?
Y/N was about to leave when Jeonghan spoke again. "I ordered every cardiology textbook available."
"I noticed. The coffee table looks like a medical library exploded."
"I'm trying to understand." He sounded almost sincere. "She's all I have left."
Y/N paused at the door. "Your grandmother is in good hands, Mr. Han."
"Jeonghan."
"Mr. Han."
He smiled. A real one, not his business smile. "You're going to slip up and call me Jeonghan eventually."
"Unlikely."
"Want to bet? Loser buys coffee."
"That would be unprofessional."
"Is that a no?"
Y/N left without answering, but they both knew she was smiling.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: They're FLIRTING Boo_CEO: Through MEDICAL TERMS Nurse_Anna: I'M SCREAMING Won_NOT_involved: This is a hospital, please don't scream Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo dear, did you get all that on camera? Won_NOT_involved: ...maybe Nurse_Anna: BABE YOU'RE FINALLY HELPING Won_NOT_involved: It's for medical documention. Rich_Granny_Han: Sure it is, dear. Sure it is. Won_NOT_involved: fine, it’s for Anna. Rich_Granny_Han: BLESSED
The next morning, Y/N found not one but two coffee cups on her desk.
First note: "For accepting that 'Mr. Han' will eventually become 'Jeonghan' - JH"
Second note: "For when you inevitably throw the first one at my head - JH"
She was not charmed. She absolutely was not.
But she kept both notes.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: SHE KEPT THE NOTES Boo_CEO: Not just kept - she SMILED Rich_Granny_Han: Time to escalate. Anna dear, remember that 'emergency' we planned? Won_NOT_involved: Oh no Rich_Granny_Han: Oh YES Boo_CEO: WHAT EMERGENCY?? Won_NOT_involved: I don't want to know Rich_Granny_Han: Trust me, this will be fun Won_NOT_involved: Your definition of fun concerns me Nurse_Anna: Babe just embrace the chaos Won_NOT_involved: I miss my old department Rich_Granny_Han: No you don't. Now, about tomorrow's plan… -
3 AM at Seoul National University Hospital was typically quiet. Tonight, however...
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Places everyone! Code: Emergency Romance begins! Boo_CEO: At 3AM?? You're evil, Halmoni Rich_Granny_Han: Evil? No. Strategic? Yes. Nurse_Anna: Night shift ready! Won_NOT_involved: This is highly unethical Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo dear, just make sure the lights are dimmed romantically Won_NOT_involved: That's not a medical setting Rich_Granny_Han: It is in Suite 520
The cardiac monitor in Suite 520 suddenly went off – louder than strictly necessary. Wonwoo, who was genuinely checking vitals, jumped.
"Halmoni, what did you—"
"Call Dr. Y/N," Granny commanded, looking far too alert for 3 AM. "And someone call my grandson."
"Your readings are actually fine—"
"Wonwoo." Granny's sweet smile held steel. "Make. The. Calls."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: Y/N's on her way! Night shift said she was doing paperwork anyway Boo_CEO: At 3AM?? She needs a life Rich_Granny_Han: She needs my grandson Won_NOT_involved: She needs sleep, actually Rich_Granny_Han: Details, details
Y/N arrived first, looking surprisingly put-together for the ungodly hour. Her white coat was pristine, but the six empty coffee cups on her desk told their own story.
"Mrs. Han, what's—"
"HALMONI!"
Jeonghan burst in, designer pajamas under a hastily thrown-on coat, hair actually messy for once.
"You called him too?" Y/N raised an eyebrow at the nurses.
"Hospital protocol," Anna said solemnly. Wonwoo suddenly found the ceiling very interesting.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: HIS HAIR IS MESSY THIS IS NOT A DRILL Nurse_Anna: Y/N definitely noticed 👀 Rich_Granny_Han: Time for my performance~ Won_NOT_involved: Please don't Rich_Granny_Han: Too late!
"Oh, my heart," Granny clutched her chest dramatically. "Such worry in young faces..."
"Your readings are actually—" Wonwoo started.
"SUCH WORRY," Granny repeated louder. "Perhaps if you both stayed..."
Y/N was already checking the monitors. Jeonghan hovered nearby, close enough that she could smell his ridiculously expensive cologne.
"Your grandmother is fine, Mr. Han."
"Jeonghan."
"Your grandmother is fine, Mr. Han."
"You're doing this on purpose now."
"I don't know what you mean, Mr. Han."
His laugh was soft, unguarded. Different from his business laugh.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: THE SOFT LAUGH!! AT 3AM!! Boo_CEO: THEY'RE STANDING SO CLOSE Rich_Granny_Han: Anna dear, dim the lights more Won_NOT_involved: That's not safe Rich_Granny_Han: Love isn't safe Won_NOT_involved: That's not medical protocol Rich_Granny_Han: Suite 520 has its own protocols
"Doctor," Granny's voice was weak but her eyes sparkled. "Since you're both here, perhaps some coffee?"
"At 3 AM?" Y/N asked.
"I brought my own beans," Jeonghan offered, then caught himself. "I mean, I happen to have some in my car."
"You just happen to have premium coffee beans in your car at 3 AM?"
"A good CFO is always prepared."
"For middle-of-the-night coffee emergencies?"
"Especially those."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: HE KEEPS COFFEE FOR HER IN HIS CAR Nurse_Anna: I'M CRYING THIS IS SO CUTE Rich_Granny_Han: Phase 1 success. Anna, initiate phase 2 Won_NOT_involved: There are phases?? Rich_Granny_Han: Of course dear, this is a military operation Nurse_Anna: On it! accidentally spilling water now Won_NOT_involved: Why did I fall in love with a conspirator
"Oh!" Anna's theatrical gasp preceded the sound of water splashing.
Y/N and Jeonghan jumped apart – when had they gotten so close? – only to bump into each other again.
"Sorry, let me—" Jeonghan reached for napkins.
"No, I can—" Y/N moved at the same time.
Their hands touched. Both froze.
Granny's monitor beeped suspiciously fast.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: THE HAND TOUCH!!! Boo_CEO: THIS IS BETTER THAN DRAMAS Nurse_Anna: Should I spill more water?? Won_NOT_involved: NO Rich_Granny_Han: Save it for next time Won_NOT_involved: There's a next time?? Rich_Granny_Han: Oh honey, we're just getting started
"Well," Y/N cleared her throat professionally. "Since your grandmother is stable, I should—"
"Stay for coffee," Jeonghan said quickly. "I mean, since we're both awake anyway."
"That would be unprofessional."
"Everything about this situation is unprofessional."
Y/N glanced at Granny (pretending to sleep), Anna (badly hiding her phone), and Wonwoo (looking like he wanted witness protection).
"One coffee," she conceded. "For medical alertness purposes."
"Of course," Jeonghan's smile was too knowing. "Purely medical."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: COFFEE DATE AT 3AM Nurse_Anna: Romance is ALIVE Rich_Granny_Han: Mission accomplished! Won_NOT_involved: It's just coffee Rich_Granny_Han: Oh sweet summer child Nurse_Anna: Babe you're so innocent Won_NOT_involved: I want a department transfer Rich_Granny_Han: Denied. Now help me plan tomorrow Won_NOT_involved: ...what's tomorrow? Rich_Granny_Han: You'll see 😈
As Y/N and Jeonghan sat in the suite's sitting area, sharing premium coffee at 3 AM while pretending this was normal, Granny Han smiled in her "sleep."
Phase one of Operation Emergency Romance was complete.
Poor kids had no idea what she had planned for breakfast.
- Several hours and many coffees later, sunrise found the suite in a different state:
Y/N curled up in an armchair, white coat slightly rumpled
Jeonghan asleep on the couch, designer pajamas and all
Files spread between them from their "purely professional discussion"
Two empty coffee cups with a concerning number of espresso shots
Granny, definitely not sleeping, taking photos for her secret Instagram
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: THEY FELL ASLEEP IN MY SUITE Boo_CEO: TOGETHER????? Nurse_Anna: Not together together but STILL Won_NOT_involved: This violates at least 5 hospital policies Rich_Granny_Han: Love violates all policies Nurse_Anna: Time for noisy morning check-up? 😈 Rich_Granny_Han: Make it EXTRA noisy
Anna burst into the suite with maximum chaos energy, deliberately dropping a metal tray.
The effect was immediate:
Y/N jolted awake, doctor mode activating
Jeonghan fell off the couch, rich person grace temporarily absent
Granny quickly pretended to just wake up
Wonwoo, entering behind Anna, looked like he wanted to quit
"Good morning!" Anna sang, far too cheerfully. "Time for morning vitals!"
Y/N and Jeonghan stared at each other, then at their wrinkled clothes, then at the evidence of their all-night coffee session.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: THE MORNING AFTER CHAOS Nurse_Anna: Y/N's hair is messy I repeat MESSY Rich_Granny_Han: Quick! Someone get a breakfast cart! Won_NOT_involved: The hospital doesn't do breakfast carts Rich_Granny_Han: The VIP floor does now Won_NOT_involved: Since when?? Rich_Granny_Han: Since I ordered it 5 minutes ago Boo_CEO: ALREADY ON IT WITH PREMIUM BREAKFAST
"I should..." Y/N stood, attempting to smooth her coat.
"Yeah, I need to..." Jeonghan ran a hand through his messy hair.
"Oh, but breakfast is coming!" Granny perked up. "You both must be hungry after staying up all night... discussing medical things."
The way she said "medical things" made both of them blush.
Right on cue, Seungkwan waltzed in pushing a cart laden with what looked like a five-star hotel breakfast spread.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: Breakfast service has arrived~ Nurse_Anna: They're both so awkward I'M LIVING Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo dear, check my heart. Make it take a while Won_NOT_involved: That's not how check-ups work Rich_Granny_Han: It is if you want that Christmas bonus Won_NOT_involved: ...this might take a while, doctor
"Since Wonwoo needs to do a thorough check-up," Granny smiled innocently, "why don't you both have breakfast? No need to waste good food."
Y/N looked at her wrinkled coat, her empty coffee cups, and her clearly compromised professional boundaries.
Jeonghan looked at his messy hair, his designer pajamas, and his equally compromised chaebol dignity.
"One coffee," they said simultaneously.
"And maybe some toast," Y/N added.
"And those croissants," Jeonghan pointed.
"Purely for energy."
"Completely professional."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: They're having breakfast together! Boo_CEO: In their sleepwear basically!! Nurse_Anna: ROMANCE LEVEL 1000 Won_NOT_involved: This is still a hospital Rich_Granny_Han: No, this is Suite 520, different rules apply Won_NOT_involved: That's not how hospitals work Rich_Granny_Han: Watch and learn, child
As they awkwardly settled with their breakfast, maintaining a careful distance that fooled absolutely no one, Granny spoke up.
"You know, Jeonghan-ah, Dr. Y/N's americano is getting cold."
Jeonghan immediately reached for the coffee machine.
"And doctor, Jeonghan skipped dinner last night. He should eat more than croissants."
Y/N found herself pushing the egg dishes closer to him.
They caught each other's eyes, realized they were being played, and quickly looked away.
But not before small smiles appeared.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: THE SOFT SMILES Boo_CEO: While sharing breakfast!! Rich_Granny_Han: Young love is so beautiful Won_NOT_involved: It's been like 3 days Rich_Granny_Han: Time moves faster in Suite 520 Nurse_Anna: It's the power of love Won_NOT_involved: It's the power of sleep deprivation Rich_Granny_Han: Same thing dear, same thing
The peaceful breakfast was interrupted by Y/N's pager.
"I need to..." she stood quickly.
"Right, I should..." Jeonghan also rose.
They did an awkward dance trying to avoid bumping into each other, failed miserably, and ended up closer than ever.
"Thanks for the medical discussion," Y/N said professionally.
"Thanks for the coffee company," Jeonghan replied, equally formal.
Neither moved.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Anna! Emergency cart in the hallway! Nurse_Anna: On it! Won_NOT_involved: Please don't crash any carts Rich_Granny_Han: Just a small crash Won_NOT_involved: That's still property damage Rich_Granny_Han: That's still romance
The sudden crash from the hallway made them jump apart. Y/N hurried out, professionalism back in place.
Jeonghan watched her go, then turned to find everyone staring at him.
"What?"
"Nothing," Granny smiled innocently. "You just look happy this morning."
"It was the coffee."
"Sure it was, dear. Sure it was."
As Jeonghan left to change, Granny turned to her squad:
"Phase 2 complete. Now, about that charity gala next week..."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Meeting in 10 minutes. We have a gala to plan Boo_CEO: Will there be drama?? Rich_Granny_Han: Oh honey, there will be CHAOS Won_NOT_involved: Why do I feel scared Nurse_Anna: Because you should be 😘 Rich_Granny_Han: Wonwoo dear, you haven't seen anything yet Won_NOT_involved: ...can I transfer departments now? Rich_Granny_Han: Denied. Now, about those formal invitations...
- Y/N stared at her desk in growing concern. Over the past week, a pattern had emerged:
Monday's coffee: "For admitting medical school doesn't teach everything - JH" Tuesday's coffee: "For finally calling me Jeonghan (in your sleep) - JH" Wednesday's coffee: "For pretending you don't smile at my notes - JH" Thursday's coffee: "Because your coffee machine is beneath you - JH" Today's coffee: "Because it's becoming a habit - JH"
She definitely didn't keep all the notes. And she absolutely wasn't smiling.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: WEEK RECAP:
Daily coffee delivery ✓
She keeps all notes ✓
Stopped throwing them away ✓
Actually smiles now ✓ 
Boo_CEO: CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT Rich_Granny_Han: Time to escalate Won_NOT_involved: What's left to escalate?? Rich_Granny_Han: Oh honey, we're just getting started Won_NOT_involved: That's what I'm afraid of
Suite 520 had evolved over the week. Somehow, it now contained:
A premium coffee station (restocked daily)
Medical textbooks (some actually right-side up)
Two comfortable chairs (suspiciously close together)
Granny's "essential" medical monitoring equipment (mostly for show)
Anna's "work station" (definitely for spying)
Y/N entered for morning rounds to find Jeonghan already there, suit perfect despite the early hour.
"You're here early, Mr. Han."
"We're back to Mr. Han? After I brought you coffee all week?"
"Medical ethics don't run on caffeine, Mr. Han."
"Are you sure? Because your smile says otherwise, Doctor."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: The TENSION Boo_CEO: He emphasized 'Doctor' I'M SCREAMING Nurse_Anna: Should I interrupt with vitals?? Rich_Granny_Han: No dear, let them flirt Won_NOT_involved: This is a hospital Rich_Granny_Han: This is Suite 520 Won_NOT_involved: That's not a real distinction Rich_Granny_Han: Tell that to my platinum card
"Children," Granny called out, "if you're done with your coffee courtship—"
"Medical discussion," Y/N corrected quickly.
"Professional interaction," Jeonghan said simultaneously.
"—perhaps we could discuss my discharge?"
Both turned to her so fast they got whiplash.
"Discharge?" Y/N frowned.
"Halmoni, no," Jeonghan started.
"Well," Granny smiled innocently, "unless you think I need more... observation?"
The way she said 'observation' made it clear she wasn't talking about medical monitoring.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: THE POWER MOVE Nurse_Anna: Halmoni playing 4D chess!! Rich_Granny_Han: Watch and learn children Won_NOT_involved: This is manipulation Rich_Granny_Han: This is ROMANCE Won_NOT_involved: Same thing in this family Rich_Granny_Han: Now you're getting it!
"Your latest tests..." Y/N began professionally.
"Show you need more monitoring," Jeonghan finished.
They stared at each other, surprised by the agreement.
"Oh?" Granny's eyes twinkled. "Both of you think so?"
"Medically speaking," Y/N clarified.
"From a family perspective," Jeonghan added.
"And it has nothing to do with morning coffee?"
"Halmoni!" they protested simultaneously.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: They're in sync!! Boo_CEO: SOULMATES BEHAVIOR Nurse_Anna: Even their denial is synchronized! Won_NOT_involved: This is getting out of hand Rich_Granny_Han: No dear, this is getting interesting Won_NOT_involved: Those aren't mutually exclusive Rich_Granny_Han: Shush and help me plan the gala seating
The tension was broken by Seungkwan bursting in, designer suit somehow even more expensive than Jeonghan's.
"Emergency!" he announced dramatically.
"Medical?" Y/N reached for her pager.
"Fashion!" Seungkwan held up a tablet. "Halmoni, the hospital charity gala needs your approval on—oh, am I interrupting something?"
His innocent tone fooled exactly no one.
"The charity gala?" Y/N blinked.
"Oh yes," Granny perked up. "Doctor, you'll be attending of course? As my physician?"
"I don't usually—"
"And Jeonghan needs a plus-one—"
"Halmoni!"
"—for medical supervision, of course."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: PHASE GALA: INITIATED Boo_CEO: I already called the designers! Nurse_Anna: Need volunteers for the medical team?? Won_NOT_involved: We're not all going Rich_Granny_Han: Check your email dear Won_NOT_involved: ...we're all going Nurse_Anna: YAY BABE! We can coordinate! Won_NOT_involved: I want a new job Rich_Granny_Han: Denied. Now about those table arrangements...
"I couldn't possibly—" Y/N started.
"It would be unprofessional—" Jeonghan began.
"Perfect!" Granny clapped. "Seungkwan, mark them down as attending."
"Already done, Halmoni!"
"I didn't agree—" Y/N protested.
"My heart would feel so much better knowing my doctor is there," Granny clutched her chest dramatically.
The monitor, naturally, beeped.
"This is manipulation," Jeonghan noted.
"Learned from the best, dear."
Y/N looked at her patient (scheming), her monitor (suspicious), and her growing headache (definitely real).
"One hour," she conceded. "For medical supervision only."
"Of course," Granny smiled sweetly. "Seungkwan, call the designers. The doctor needs a gown."
"Already on it!"
"Wait, what—"
But Seungkwan was already speed-dialing, Granny was looking triumphant, and Jeonghan...
Jeonghan was looking at her like he wouldn't mind being supervised. Medically speaking, of course.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Operation Gala: Phase 1 complete Boo_CEO: Designers on standby! Nurse_Anna: Medical team assembled! Won_NOT_involved: This is excessive Rich_Granny_Han: No dear, this is just the beginning Won_NOT_involved: That's what I'm afraid of Rich_Granny_Han: Don't worry, it gets worse Won_NOT_involved: How is that reassuring?? Rich_Granny_Han: It's not. Now, about those dance lessons...
Suite 520 had transformed into Gala Planning Headquarters. Somehow, between cardiac monitoring equipment and medical charts, there were now:
Three tablets showing designer collections
Fabric swatches spread across medical equipment
Seating charts mixed with ECG readings
Event planners trying to look like medical consultants
And Granny, orchestrating chaos from her hospital bed
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Status report!
Venue: Hospital Grand Hall
Theme: "Hearts of Gold" (get it? 😉)
Seating: Y/N next to Jeonghan (medical purposes)
Dance floor: Strategically lit 
Boo_CEO: The THEME I'M DYING Nurse_Anna: Should we coordinate the medical team's outfits?? Won_NOT_involved: We're supposed to be working Rich_Granny_Han: This IS work. Love work.
Y/N entered for afternoon rounds to find what looked like a fashion magazine explosion.
"Mrs. Han, this isn't good for your recovery—"
"Nonsense," Granny waved a fabric swatch. "Doctor, which shade of blue brings out Jeonghan's eyes?"
"I... what?"
"For medical coordination purposes, of course."
From behind his laptop, Jeonghan choked on his coffee.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: SHE'S BLUSHING Nurse_Anna: AND HE'S CHOKING Rich_Granny_Han: Young love is so clumsy Won_NOT_involved: This is a medical facility Rich_Granny_Han: This is a love facility Won_NOT_involved: That's not a thing Rich_Granny_Han: It is in Suite 520
"Halmoni," Jeonghan tried, "perhaps the doctor doesn't want to—"
"Navy," Y/N said suddenly, then looked mortified.
"What?"
"Navy blue. For medical... contrast purposes."
Jeonghan's slow smile should be illegal in a hospital setting.
"Noted," Granny's eyes sparkled. "Seungkwan! Call the designer!"
"Already texting!"
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: SHE PICKED HIS COLOR Boo_CEO: VOLUNTARILY Nurse_Anna: THE DEVELOPMENT Won_NOT_involved: It's just a color Rich_Granny_Han: Oh sweet summer child Nurse_Anna: Babe you're so innocent Won_NOT_involved: I miss regular patients Rich_Granny_Han: No you don't. Now about the dance playlist...
Later that day, Y/N returned to find Jeonghan arguing with event planners while wearing... navy blue.
"It's for a medical opinion," he said quickly.
"I didn't ask."
"You're wondering."
"I'm wondering about your grandmother's blood pressure with all this excitement."
"Liar. You're wondering how accurate your color assessment was."
She checked Granny's monitors instead of answering. Or looking at how right she'd been about the navy blue.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: HE CHANGED SUITS FOR HER Boo_CEO: THE DEDICATION Nurse_Anna: She kept stealing glances!! Won_NOT_involved: I saw nothing Rich_Granny_Han: The security cameras saw everything Won_NOT_involved: ...I may have footage Nurse_Anna: BABE YOU'RE ONE OF US NOW Won_NOT_involved: I hate everything except you Rich_Granny_Han: No you don't. Now help me plan the "medical emergency" during the slow dance
"Doctor," Granny called out sweetly, "about the gala's medical supervision..."
"One hour," Y/N reminded firmly.
"Of course. Jeonghan will pick you up at 7."
"That's not necessary—"
"For medical transport," Granny added innocently.
"I can drive—"
"My heart would feel better knowing you arrive safely."
The monitor beeped right on cue.
"Halmoni," Jeonghan sighed, but he was smiling.
"Fine," Y/N conceded. "For medical purposes."
"Of course," Granny beamed. "Seungkwan! Call the car service!"
"Already done!"
"How are you already—never mind."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Car arrangements: Complete ✓
Premium vehicle
Mood lighting
"Accidental" traffic delays 
Boo_CEO: EVIL GENIUS HALMONI Nurse_Anna: The POWER Won_NOT_involved: This is getting elaborate Rich_Granny_Han: Oh honey, wait for the gala Won_NOT_involved: I'm scared Rich_Granny_Han: You should be. Anna dear, about those dance floor spotlights...
As Y/N left for her rounds, she found a new coffee on the nurses' station.
The note read: "Navy blue does bring out my eyes. Good medical observation. - JH"
She didn't smile.
(The security footage Wonwoo definitely wasn't collecting said otherwise.)
- Two months after Code: Heart Doctor began, Suite 520 was in organized chaos:
Discharge papers waiting for signatures
Gift baskets from the entire hospital staff
Granny's designer luggage (more than a small hotel's worth)
The infamous coffee machine
And a certain cardiologist avoiding a certain CFO
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: FINAL MISSION STATUS:
Two months of schemes ✓
One charity gala success ✓
Multiple "emergencies" ✓
Countless coffee dates ✓
One almost kiss ✓
BUT STILL NO CONFESSION 
Boo_CEO: HOW ARE THEY SO STUBBORN Nurse_Anna: Even the cafeteria's betting pool is frustrated Won_NOT_involved: Maybe let them figure it out naturally? Rich_Granny_Han: Absolutely not Won_NOT_involved: Why did I even suggest that Rich_Granny_Han: Time for the final play
Y/N stood at the nurses' station, pretending to review charts while actually hiding. The past two months had been... complicated.
After the gala (which definitely didn't end with an almost-kiss during Granny's conveniently timed "emergency"), things had gotten awkward.
Sweet, terrible, coffee-filled awkward.
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Nurse_Anna: She's HIDING Boo_CEO: Our confident doctor? HIDING? Rich_Granny_Han: Love makes fools of us all Won_NOT_involved: Or maybe this whole scheme was too much Rich_Granny_Han: No such thing Won_NOT_involved: Why did I marry into this chaos Nurse_Anna: Because you love me 😘 Won_NOT_involved: TRUE. TRUEST FORM. Rich_Granny_Han: We get it, you love Anna
The suite's door opened, revealing Jeonghan in what had to be his most expensive suit yet. Navy blue, because of course it was.
"Doctor."
"Mr. Han."
"We're back to that?"
"We never left it."
(They both knew that was a lie. Somewhere between late-night coffee and fake emergencies, "Jeonghan" had slipped out more than once.)
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: IMPLEMENT FINAL PHASE Boo_CEO: But what about the backup plan?? Rich_Granny_Han: This IS the backup plan Nurse_Anna: What about backup backup?? Rich_Granny_Han: Trust your commander Won_NOT_involved: Should I be concerned? Rich_Granny_Han: Always, dear. Always.
"Children," Granny called from her bed, "come here please."
They approached cautiously. Two months had taught them to fear that innocent tone.
"Since I'm being discharged—"
"About that," Y/N started.
"Your readings—" Jeonghan began.
"Oh hush," Granny waved them off. "We all know I'm fine. Have been for weeks."
They stared at her.
"You..." Y/N processed this. "You've been faking?"
"Not faking, dear. Strategizing."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: THE CONFESSION Nurse_Anna: Finally exposing the plot!! Won_NOT_involved: This feels illegal somehow Rich_Granny_Han: Love knows no laws Won_NOT_involved: That's not how legality works Rich_Granny_Han: That's how Suite 520 works
"All those emergencies..." Jeonghan realized.
"The 3 AM calls..." Y/N added.
"The coffee accidents..."
"The gala emergency..."
"The almost—" they both stopped, blushing.
"Yes, yes," Granny smiled. "All part of the plan. Operation Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024."
"The WHAT."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Dropping the bomb! Boo_CEO: THE CHAOS Nurse_Anna: Should we run?? Won_NOT_involved: I'm already in the cafeteria Rich_Granny_Han: Cowards. Watch the master work
"Halmoni," Jeonghan looked pained. "You've been scheming this whole time?"
"Of course, dear. You think cardiac monitors just happen to beep during romantic moments?"
"The coffee spills..." Y/N remembered.
"Anna has excellent timing."
"The gala emergency..."
"Seungkwan's dramatic skills are underappreciated."
"The security footage..."
"Wonwoo pretends to resist, but he's got quite the collection."
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Boo_CEO: THEY'RE BOTH SO RED Nurse_Anna: The realization!! Won_NOT_involved: Should we call security? Rich_Granny_Han: For what? True love? Won_NOT_involved: For imminent chaos Rich_Granny_Han: That's just how romance works dear
"So everything was fake?" Y/N asked quietly.
"Not everything," Jeonghan said quickly.
They looked at each other.
"The coffee wasn't fake," he continued.
"The medical discussions weren't fake."
"The almost-kiss wasn't fake."
"The feelings weren't fake."
Granny beamed. "Finally!"
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: MISSION SUCCESS Boo_CEO: I'M CRYING Nurse_Anna: WE DID IT Won_NOT_involved: Can we work normally now? Rich_Granny_Han: Oh honey no Rich_Granny_Han: Now we plan the wedding Won_NOT_involved: ...I want a transfer Rich_Granny_Han: Denied.
"You're ridiculous," Y/N told Jeonghan, but she was smiling.
"You love it," he replied, then froze. "I mean—"
"Yeah," she said softly. "I do."
"Oh thank god," Granny exclaimed. "Seungkwan! The champagne!"
"Already chilled!"
"Anna! The celebration decorations!"
"Ready to deploy!"
"Wonwoo! The documentation!"
"...fine."
As Suite 520 erupted into celebration, Y/N looked at Jeonghan.
"Your grandmother is terrifying."
"Wait till you see her wedding planning mode."
"Let's survive the first date first."
"Coffee tomorrow?"
"You've been bringing me coffee for two months."
"Yes, but now I can kiss you after."
From her bed, Granny smiled at her success. As Y/N and Jeonghan shared their first real kiss (finally!), the cardiac monitor beeped one last time.
This time, it was real.
Real love tends to do that to a heart. As Y/N and Jeonghan finally broke apart, the cardiac monitor beeped one last time.
"Your grandmother's monitor is still sensitive," Y/N murmured.
"Actually," Jeonghan smiled, "I think that one was real."
They turned to find Granny beaming at them, not even pretending to sleep anymore.
"Finally!" she exclaimed. "Do you know how exhausting it was to orchestrate all this?"
"Halmoni..."
"The timing of the beeps! The strategic coffee spills! Keeping Wonwoo from reporting us to hospital administration!"
🏥 Get Jeonghan a Girlfriend 2024 !!! 🏥
Rich_Granny_Han: Mission accomplished, everyone! Boo_CEO: The greatest success story of 2024!! Nurse_Anna: I'm crying happy tears in the supply closet Won_NOT_involved: Can we work normally now? Rich_Granny_Han: Of course dear Won_NOT_involved: Really? Rich_Granny_Han: No 😘 Nurse_Anna: Babe you should know better Won_NOT_involved: I really should
"Well," Y/N picked up the discharge papers, trying to look professional despite her smile. "Since your condition has... miraculously improved, Mrs. Han—"
"Still Halmoni," Granny corrected.
"Halmoni," Y/N conceded, her smile growing. "You're free to go home."
"Wonderful! Jeonghan-ah, help me pack. Doctor, you'll join us for dinner to discuss my home care, won't you?"
"That would be—"
"If you say unprofessional, I'm canceling the discharge," Granny threatened sweetly.
Y/N looked at Jeonghan, who shrugged helplessly but couldn't stop smiling.
"Dinner would be lovely," she agreed.
As the suite erupted into celebration, with Seungkwan popping in with champagne and Anna wiping tears while pretending to check vitals one last time, Y/N felt Jeonghan's hand slip into hers.
"Coffee tomorrow?" he asked softly.
"You've been bringing me coffee for two months."
"Yes, but now I can kiss you after."
She squeezed his hand. "Looking forward to it."
From her bed, Granny Han watched her grandson and his cardiologist, her heart monitor beeping steadily with genuine joy. Sometimes, she thought, love just needs a little push.
Or in her case, two months of elaborate schemes, a charity gala, multiple fake emergencies, one almost-kiss, and an army of co-conspirators.
But who's counting?
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stillness-in-green · 2 days ago
Note
why do you think Deku never tried to talk to Shigaraki? doylist reason is obvious but what's the watsonian reason?
Honestly, this one’s pretty tricky to answer.  It’s very hard to get myself into the headspace of Deku (and the people in his own headspace!)—mainly because I get extremely uncharitable, extremely quickly.  Mainly about Horikoshi, yes, but that does extend to Deku, too, as well as the broader world he lives in.
The brain goes immediately to answers like, “His world is so incredibly slanted towards retributive models of justice that the fact that he even thinks about wanting to know Shigaraki’s motivations makes him a candidate for mad sainthood to the people around him.  The fact that he doesn’t follow that impulse through all the way to actually asking is immaterial; while Villains have to be punished for their actions, for Heroes, it’s the thought that counts.”
See how I’m already drifting back towards meta-narrative analysis at the end there?  Deku brings a lot of that out in me, especially from Villain Hunt onwards.  Like the wooden doll he’s named for, he comes off to me as a vessel for the plot to happen through more than he does a consistently written, well-thought-out character.  Trying to think of him through a purely Watsonian lens—no refences made at all, period, to what I think the story was trying to express or what Horikoshi’s intentions towards that story were—I almost immediately jump the tracks into territory that is all but certainly incompatible with what I was “supposed” to take away from MHA as a story.
But, you did ask, so I’ll follow the thought experiment through.  If I were to try and set down to paper an explanation for Deku’s actions from a purely in-universe stance—say, for writing canon compliant post-series fanfic—what would be my explanation?
(Hit the jump.)
Right off the bat, from a cultural perspective, I think Deku is afraid that if he tries to make excuses for Shigaraki, it would be disrespectful to Shigaraki’s victims.  That’s why you get the heroic characters constant harping on about how they can’t forgive the Villains, even though, as adjuncts to the police, “forgiveness” is utterly immaterial to them doing their jobs.  Too much sympathy for criminals, in some peoples’ eyes, becomes indicative of a lack of proper regard for the victims of crime; this is very much a dynamic in play in Japan’s legal system.[1]  Ochaco initially has the same impulse, where she’s terrified that even thinking about Toga Himiko’s human circumstances puts her in danger of forgetting the suffering Toga and the League brought about.
1: That’s a meta consideration, yes, but one that I think the target audience would understand to be implicit in the canon as written, so I’m treating it as a Watsonian detail.
Ochaco and Deku commiserate and ultimately encourage each other to embrace their desire to understand their respective Villains, which leads to Ochaco talking to Toga at some length!  Ochaco must do this because asking Toga these questions if the only way she has to reach that understanding.  Deku does not have to ask, however, because he has a cheatmode to fall back on: the mindscape shared between All For One and One For All.  If Deku thinks too much open communication with Villains risks dishonoring Shigaraki’s victims, well, he doesn’t have to openly communicate.  He doesn’t have to talk to Shigaraki the person at all.  He just has to find that crying little boy in the mindscape again.
I also think it’s notable that Deku very much does stop talking about wanting to save Shigaraki after he talks to Gran Torino.  From that point on, everything he says about Shigaraki becomes about wanting to understand him instead.  Coupled with the idea that he insists upon not forgiving Shigaraki, I get the sense that what Deku wants is not to help Shigaraki at all, but rather to simply bear witness to his truth.  And even that much feels self-serving to me—as if Deku doesn’t care so much that Shigaraki is in pain, but rather that Shigaraki might have a point, that Shigaraki’s pain might be valid.  Shigaraki having a valid point would destabilize everything Deku believes about Heroes and Hero Society, and Deku has, by that point, seen enough that he’s too upright to look away, to “sweep things back under the rug,” so he has to find out Shigaraki’s story to judge it for himself.
The fact that he feels he has the right to judge Shigaraki’s story speaks to the arrogance of Heroes—the same arrogance that leads them to declare their lack of forgiveness as if it’s in some way relevant to doing the job in front of them—as well as a deeply rooted defensiveness: that they must have, and be perceived as having, the moral high ground over those evil Villains.  I think, for example, of the Flamin’ Sidekickers and their cringingly awkward self-justifications to Dabi about their continued association with Todoroki Enji.  Their reasoning has zero bearing on either Dabi’s pain or their own heroic responsibilities to assist in the arrest of a known murderer/terrorist/arsonist, but they feel the need to spell that reasoning out to the child abuse victim/volatile Villain anyway, seemingly for no in-character reason save to rationalize the deep discomfort that Dabi’s video accusations provoked in them.
Heroes must be seen as morally just—this is the whole basis for the authority they’ve been granted to wield their powers against other people.  Best Jeanist talks about this idea explicitly, as does Police Chief Tsuragamae.  Far more damningly, it’s what led to the HPSC using agents like Lady Nagant and Hawks to quietly dispose of anyone that would present a threat to the public image of Heroes and, by extension, the fragile peace that rests on that public image.
Heroes must be pure and righteous, and Deku is just as apt to believe that as any other Hero—maybe even more apt, given that he’s also had All Might leaning on him about the bearer of One For All being the Pillar and the Symbol of Peace.  All this baggage winds up conflicting, however, with the horror and reflexive need to help Deku feels upon seeing the small, crying child within Shigaraki.
Saving small crying children is the absolute, innermost core of Deku’s personal framing of Heroism—seriously, he says this nearly word-for-word in Chapter 1!—and so, like Shouji says of the heteromorph riot, it isn’t something he can ignore and still call himself a Hero.  He’s unprepared for that personal brand of Heroism to conflict with the demands of professional Heroism, because he never expected to face someone who was both Evil Villain and Crying Child at the same time.  This is what he wrestles with over the course of his time away from UA and why, ultimately, he decides to use the mindscape as a way of resolving the conflict.
(Note again that I'm talking about my fanfic explanation here. Deku's reasoning is much murkier in the canon because of the canon's late turn towards locking us hard out of Deku's personal feelings and thoughts when they're about anything more complex than chain OFA combo moves.)
Remember that Deku begins the Villain Hunt Arc with a tentative desire to “understand Villains” so that he can perhaps use that understanding to avert or at least deescalate conflicts with them—and then the very first Villain he falteringly tries to understand is fucking Muscular, who shuts him down cold.  Deku never tries that hard[2] to understand a Villain again—Lady Nagant dumps her backstory on him with very little prompting from him, he has nothing but ultimatums for Overhaul, he doesn’t seem to ask any of AFO’s other minions any personal questions whatsoever, and with Shigaraki, he goes straight to the mindscape instead of even attempting a dialogue.
2: Insomuch as you could call asking three invasive, judgy questions in the middle of combat and then throwing in the towel “trying hard”.
My take is that Muscular scared him off of trying to verbally uncover the backstories of Villains—even though Shigaraki is ready to all but hand the first Hero to ask an illustrated history of his grievances with Hero Society, Deku can’t trust that anything Shigaraki tells him will be the unvarnished truth.  Unlike Shouto, he has no one to corroborate the truth with, but unlike Uraraka, he doesn’t just have to make the best of it, either.  He can instead utilize the mindscape, an approach that sidesteps all of the issues that a spoken dialogue would entail:
Getting Shigaraki’s truth via the mindscape means he can trust the answers he gets, rather than having to filter those answers through Shigaraki’s warped worldview.  This allows him to honestly evaluate Shigaraki’s perspective, gauging whether Shigaraki has a real point that Deku has any responsibility to address, some injustice that needs to be corrected independently of Shigaraki being held accountable for his crimes.    
Having decided that—for reasons of justice, All Might’s Pillar mentality, and his own peace of mind—he has to know Shigaraki’s truth, Deku comes to feel self-righteously entitled to that truth.  Thus, even though Shigaraki always seemed perfectly willing to share his thoughts in their previous encounters, Deku can’t take the chance that he’ll change his mind and rebuff Deku like Muscular did.  Using the mindscape takes that agency away from Shigaraki, rendering his willingness to share moot.    
No one other than people with access to the shared mindscape can perceive the interactions happening within it.  This means that, no matter what Deku learns or how he reacts to it in the moment, he doesn’t risk being seen as disrespecting Shigaraki’s victims by prioritizing the feelings and perspective of a vicious terrorist.    
Finally, on a tactical note, the encounter Deku has with Shigaraki in the mindscape during the Jakku battle seems to happen nigh instantaneously.  If he can get his answers at the speed of thought, that means he doesn’t have to specifically draw out his battle with Shigaraki until he’s resolved things to his personal satisfaction.  This is ideal, since Shigaraki presents an incredibly dangerous threat to everything and everyone around him, and Deku’s Hero education has repeatedly emphasized the importance of ending battles quickly.
There's just one problem with all this: Deku is assuming access to Shigaraki’s mind.  And why wouldn’t he?  He got in there without even trying last time, after all!  I assume that’s also why he rolls up to the battle with zero plans of any kind: he doesn’t understand how the mechanics of the shared mindscape work and none of the prior bearers can advise him because it’s a brand-new phenomenon for him as the ninth bearer, so they’re just as clueless about it as he is. 
Lacking that knowledge, he opts to simply take it on faith that he’ll be able to access that mental space again, find the crying child in it, and uncover enough about Shigaraki’s history to render his own judgement of it.  He's the Deku who does his best, after all; if it doesn't work, at least he'll know he tried. The good faith attempt, however it turns out, will allow him to satisfy his own sense of justice while not interfering with whatever temporal justice the adult Heroes are planning for Shigaraki—to which Deku fully believes he must be subjected as punishment for his crimes!—be it arrest or an execution broadcast to the entire world.
Unfortunately for Deku, thanks to his being waylaid by Toga, he turns up late to the battle only to find Shigaraki’s psyche sealed up tighter than an All Might-themed wall safe.  Then, since he never had any kind of plan for talking to Shigaraki, and his own ability to plan things is strictly limited to combining quirk abilities on the fly, he has to wing it until Kudou is able to come up with a plan for him.  Naturally, because Kudou is Kudou, and Heroes’ solutions are tailored to Heroes’ strengths, this involves violent psychic assault.  And why not?  It’s not like Deku believes Shigaraki deserves the mercy of a gentler approach.  Just think of all those people he hurt!
Now, is this all heckin’ uncharitable?  Does it paint Deku as well-intended but blindly self-righteous and ethically timid? Oh, for sure.  And I do think there was a point at which Deku wanted to save Shigaraki in a truer sense—indeed, he’s quite plain-spoken about it in the OFA Mental Conference in the aftermath of the first war!  However, it’s absolutely within his established characterization to run into things that make him uneasy and take the first out an authority figure offers him that spares him the work of demolishing and rebuilding his entire world view.  Look no further than the aftermath of the mall scene. You can draw a straight line from Deku taking Tsukauchi's out (that Shigaraki is just a sore loser) to him also taking Gran's (that killing Shigaraki could be a way of saving him).
That’s the mentality I would lean on to explain Deku’s anemic efforts to truly save Shigaraki in the end: an inherent desire to help people that has been hamstrung by a learned dehumanization of Villains, a repeated emphasis on swift, unthinking action as a Heroic virtue, a culture that regards sympathy for those involved in a crime as a zero sum game, and, last but not least, a psychological complex about the basic nature of Heroism rooted in his fraught childhood.
Deku says he’ll “never forget” Shigaraki. If it were me writing the sequel, “never forgetting” would look an awful lot like, “Following a particularly frustrating day of the Pro Hero grind, Midoriya Izuku opens his eyes at 4AM one cold winter night in his early-40s with the horrible, inescapable realization that what he did as a teenager to a deeply victimized young man barely older than he was himself back then was fucked up in ways he can never repair or take back.  And further that now, not only is he going to have to spend the rest of his life trying to make up for that act, it’s going to be much, much harder than it would have been back then, specifically because he did what he did back then and let the world get away with calling it heroism.”
Thanks for the ask, anon! I hope you find the answer interesting and at least somewhat believable, for all that it certainly isn't tonally in-line with the story's portrayal of its much-lauded protagonist.
   
(P.S. On top of convincing both All Might and Deku to not pursue saving Shigaraki in any concrete sense, Gran Torino also takes partial credit for Nana's decision to abandon Kotarou. Torino Sorahiko might actually be the all-time world champion of convincing OFA bearers that preserving One For All is worth abandoning children to their grim fates. Give him a hand, everyone. What a great and admirable Hero who absolutely deserved to survive all the way to the end of the story and who definitely is not a symbol of all the most jaded and cynical priorities of the old order.)
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animefreak1145 · 2 days ago
Text
Lightning in a Bottle(Adler x Bell!Reader)(Oneshot)
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Word Count: 2k Summary: A one in a million chance. Impossible.
But Bell always was a chance, weren't you? Just like Adler always was confident in his odds. Warnings: Mature Rating/Graphic Violence, Dark Themes, Torture, Brainwashing, Manipulation, Toxic Relationship, Trauma, Female!Reader Bell, Adler x Bell, Crack Treated Seriously, Solovetsky Ending. A/N: Don't treat this fic seriously. You might get dissapointed. This is literally crack at the start which turns serious. Me and @makeyourpeacenow were just fooling around and she inspired me to write this thing out as we chatted. Less tumblr meme format and RPG style and more actual story. She added a paragraph in here that I kept.
The afternoon sun did nothing for the chill that hung in the air, the crispness only adding into the classic Russian cold. The waves hitting against the cliff side in the distance where you’re sure they were doing the same on the cliff they were on, as the flowers and long grass moving with the cool breeze.
It was beautiful.
Beautifully tainted as your hand made quick work of releasing from your holster just as Adler did, both pulling the trigger and the sound of twin guns breaking the calm atmosphere. Broken just as Adler did to you, your heart torn and anger boarding in your veins still hot from the betrayal.
Clang!
The sound rung in your ears more than the bullet being released from the gun, a brief spark in the air. A violent flash that went in the next blink before a bullet ricocheted to the rock to your left while the other dug deep into the ground by the flowers that were just innocently moving along—petals torn from the speed of the bullet. 
Your eyes were wide, mouth parted as you stared at the area where the bullet hit the rock, your grip on your pistol a tad loose although still up and ready. Adler in your peripherals sharing his own silent disbelief at what just occurred, gun still raised as well but head facing towards the torn flowers.
The air of heavy silence broke when you finally blinked your shock away, jerking your head towards Adler who continued to stare down at the bullets with a pressed frown.
“You just tried to kill me!” You accuse, gun gesturing wildly at the bullets on the ground while also motioning towards him.
Adler finally lifted his eyes, throwing you a blank stare. “That makes two of us,” he said blandly. He gave you a gave you a once over before stupefyingly deciding you were no threat for he took a cigarette out of his tactical vest and lighting it while managing to keep a grip on his pistol. You could only stare in bafflement as he took a lazy drag,  giving a subtle nod of his head towards you. The one you always were desperate for before. “Say…you’ve been a good team mate, Bell. Take this as a sign. Second chance.”
“Are you…are you seriously not gonna talk about this?!” Your voice pitched higher at the end, completely bewildered.
Adler’s nonchalance was not something that bothered you before. You were actually thankfully for it and even a hint amused by it when he told Hudson he would be taking you and only you to Lubyanka. You remember his cool praise about you towards Hudson, how it created a warmth in your cheeks and feeling light momentarily before Hudson went off in a huff. Adler giving you directly words of comfort, speaking of Hudson not liking things in his control.
Adler was just mocking you. You were in the palm of his hand all along, accepting treats from said hand with casual pats to the head.
You feel like you might hurl. Or cry.
“Hm?” Adler took a hefty drag, his gaze not leaving your form. It made you shift your legs, swallowing dryly. "Something on your mind, soldier?"
His words dripped with smoke, going purposely in your direction and hurrying it along by blowing the rest.
Your jaw tightened, glaring. You waved the smoke away before moving forward, Adler tensing but not making any move as you just snatched his cigarette from his silver tongued mouth and throwing it over the cliff. Adler turning his head with only a quick press of the lips to show his displeasure at your waste. As if he didn’t prompt you to feel your wrath in the first place. It only made your blood boil further.
“You just tried to kill me and now you’re what? ‘Giving me a second chance?’ You can’t be this crazy! Cause you have to know, this—“ You wave your pistoled arm around the area with the bullets back and forth from your chest to his, even poking him with the barrel of your gun. “—is crazy!”
You knew he had some issues. Your “shared” past and all, you saw things from his past maybe you shouldn’t have. He cut off a piece of his mind, forcing the piece to fit into yours with brute force—all blood and brain matter and pokes of needles. Your fault for thinking you were special knowing him so well and intimately, knowing his way of thinking and plans before he even finished the sentence. Your mind clicking away at the possible scenarios he would suggest before zooming into one and stating it out loud. He always paused when you did that, assessing you before there it was—the reward, the ghost of a smirk before nodding at you with the words “Exactly my line of thinking.” or “A bit of a mind reader, are we, Bell?” or “And that’s why you’re my protege. Good job, Bell.”
It’s not fair, you want to cry out, clenching your grip around the pistol still to his chest yet your fingers off the trigger. Your throat feeling tight as you gazed up at the man who only rose a brow at you. It’s not fair! 
“So you want me to kill you?” Adler moved your pistol hand away, you letting him as you looked down with a defeated scowl. Your hold on your pistol obsolete. Your eyes tightened at that fact. You notice Adler kept his own pistol loose by his side. All it would take is one quick movement and you’ll be dead. Truly this time. Luck can’t save you like this. You’re closer to the cliff’s edge, maybe your body will fall into the waters below. Forever separate from him. Your stomach coiled back at the image. “What is it, Bell? What do you actually want?”
You can’t say. It gets stuck in your throat. 
You can’t say and you hate you still have it. This wretched feelings. Even after a deadly shot towards your chest. Even after his gall and apathetic nature to what just occurred(despite him still calling you soldier. “You’re still one of us.” Even now when you tried to kill him yourself, ignoring your own hypocrisy.) Your chest still bleeds only for one. You think only ever one.
It’ll only be the one because you’ve been ruined. Forever. Your trust dismantled for another yet still hopelessly, despairingly wishing to actually think you might have a chance. Even after this.
With him. You’ve been ruined for others. And the worst thing is, you’re actually fine if he is the one that’ll keep ruining you. This vicious cycle. You shot at him yes. But he had the gall to save you in Trabzon and make you think you’re close and something more. Not quite lovers. Not quite friends. Something in between.
He had the gall to make you feel this, your loyalties switched at the flip of a coin—you’re the tails he’s the head.
A coin. He had the gall to make you his other half. The tails. And he tried to kill you. And now he’s saving you. Because of…chance?
Take it, begrudgingly. Argue the matter, even if it's a nonsensical position. Argue because you want to argue—because you need to yell. Even if your feelings on it are oxymoronic. How can you hate him so much, yet refuse to part from him. Your stomach churned at the mere thought of your dead corpse even being away from his live one.
Fate? Bullets together? Is that what this is? Is he saving you to stick by him or to throw away and be by yourself? You don’t think you could be without him. Too tied together. You know his deepest secrets from Vietnam and he knows your mind. You’ve played in each other’s mind palaces, hands digging and blood spilling and bones crunching, napalm strikes on bodies—you’re tied.
You stay silent too long, biting at the inside of your lips before forcing yourself to look up at him meaningfully—eyes meeting for you can see them behind his shades at this distance, the sun helping you. Adler tilting his head and something passes over his gaze but you lower your head again and scoff, putting your pistol back in its holster begrudgingly.
“You’re stuck with me, then. Hope this is worth it.”
You notice the exhaustion set in his soul, the weight he bears. He carries it, alone, and you have no pity to offer.
You feel his weighted gaze just like you sense his exhaustion, putting his own pistol carefully away. Cautious if you will change your mind and decide to tear out his neck like he tore at your heart. You don’t.
Tied, your mind repeats. For better or for worse.
Like a twisted marriage.
You don’t look until your eyes widen when you feel the familiar touch of a hand on your head.
“Come on, kid. You know we’re stuck with each other. You’ve always been a slippery little thing,” his hand shifts and it’s on your cheek, feeling the leather as your eyes take in the quirk of his scarred mouth. What you always hunger for—the uptick to suggest a smile  “But not with me. I have you, Bell. I have you.”
You’re so easy.
You fall so prettily for him. 
You hate it. You love him.
You hate that too.
So it’s no surprise you let out a breathy sigh when he thumbs your lips and say an “Okay.”
He’s like a snake wrangler, you've got venom; you bare your teeth but you'll never bite—never him.
Always for others. He just has to point. He can be America’s Monster. 
But you? You can be Adler’s Dog.
You can accept that. You can accept the little touches and mindful quips of philosophy and books—even if you burn more at his touch then the danger close you experienced a mere half an hour ago—you can live with it. You can.
That’s your mantra in your head. Even as you stare up at him longingly, adoringly—a little lost yet accepting of whatever he says and does as he seems to look into you—that’s what you keep thinking.
You’re fine with this.
Be the tool. You can be that again for him. Willingly this time. He doesn’t have to love you like you do him. He doesn’t.
Even if you know him as equal or better than Sims. Even if you know the man behind the Vietnam soldier—behind the brave face. Behind the mask he’s made(the mask wasn’t supposed to be for you). Even with knowing where his mind goes and tracks, you’re satisfied with this.
You have to be. After all, nothing was personal. Those conversations outside the safehouse, the roof, the elevator of Lubyanka( “I need Bell”), defense against Hudson, the camera—
You don’t expect—
A tilt of the chin with firm fingers and a touch to the lips. You can feel his face on yours.
Your pupils are blown and your hands are still just as your mind has stopped. He didn’t seem to mind, a tease of your mouth and that’s all it takes for you open for him. Ready. Just a touch. A hint.
That’s all you need. Adler always gets what he wants. You’ll give it to him. 
You grab at him, the back of his neck and feel that hair underneath his beanie. Uncaring if it falls to the floor. You’re embarrassed at the pitiful sound you made when he pulled away. Only to silence when he taps his forehead to yours, hands on your waist with a comforting squeeze.
You can see his eyes. That electric blue.
“I have you, Bell,” he repeats, his breath tickling your face with that light smirk that unmakes you.
You blink. You assess, even with cheeks hot. 
You hold back the cheek splitting smile for a more mild hopeful one.
“Okay,” you breathe.
▚ 
A/N: Adler knows how to manipulate Bell perfectly well. Poor Bell. She knows how easy she is too. They're both satisfied where they're at. Sucks.
Tag List: @tr1ppylady @parkeepingparker @weirdoartist21 @gojocat247 @mayaibnlaahad @dallmaistir @salvija @kylezkie4adler @asaltryefl @stupid-stinky @aurora-windu @zachfoxx121 @pyxis-stellae @makeyourpeacenow @obsessedgremlin
You have to tell me if you want me to tag you for each update or else I won't know. Or if you wish to be removed.
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sabine-smitten-obviously · 2 days ago
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And YOU will feel healed of the last 15
... when you read this fic. That is, as long as you suffered from an abandonement wound like i did.
Ello lovelies, i have another wonderful fanfic-rec for you! 🤓
But you are an ocean by @ineffably-good
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Coverart by @ineffableclassics
What it is about:
After Aziraphale's defection, Crowley tries to figure out how to live life for himself.
Notes:
Ok so, the end of season two broke me. Figured I was maybe done writing stories about these two after that. And yet, several hours later, a sentence appeared in my head, and then this happened. Guessing at chapter totals… I'm finding I like the idea of Crowley going off in a different direction than what I'd initially expect. Not just raging, not sleeping for a century, but actually trying to move on. And why the hell shouldn't he just move to the South Downs by himself? So here we are.
What i like about it:
🩷This fic doesn´t jump in on pushing the story - their story - forward. Instead it goes a totally different path. A quite big part of it is dedicated to Crowley mending the pieces of his broken heart. It´s endearing, it´s breathtaking and it will have you cry. Not only for Crowley but for every single person who ever had to endure heartbreak.
🩷Fun fact no.1: in real life I am a relationship-coach specialised in toxic relationships and heartbreak. And the way Crowley´s heartbreak is described couldn´t be any more accurate. Every thought, every pain, every action he takes, the strength it costs him, the weight of it all - its written absolutely to the point. I could have copied several pages for the "most beloved quote".
🩷So Crowley tries to build a life for himself. Not just living without the angel and rotting in a pit, but really trying to carve out a nice little existence for himself. He is doing his work, he is healing and you can follow along with him, as he learns to build at least new "friendships" - though he would never call it that himself, thanks a lot.
🩷This healing-journey takes quite some time and somewhere in the middle of it i started to think - he could do it. He COULD heal his hurt, mourn the loss and still somehow at least live a life on his own. Maybe feeling the missing part of himself for the rest of his existence, but not being miserable about it the whole time. And that is a thought - a wish - i would have for my dark angel.
I could see him living that life and at one point i almost thought - i would love to see how that would´ve played out for him. A life without Aziraphale. What connections would Crowley have made? How would he have coped with the loss of those humanly connections lifespan after lifespan? Would he have relocated each century? Would he have moved to Australia and learned surfing at one time? Would he have become a timelord and travelled - i mean seriously, Crowley could do that probably?
But you, my dear, are an ocean.
And oceans are ancient
And can survive everything,
Even the wrath of weather and planets.
-- Nikita Gill
SPOILERS AHEAD - if you don´t want to know the plot, stop reading here.
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Stop reading if you dont want spoilers!
Ok - you´ve been warned! Here we go: 🤗
🩷Fun fact no.2: I actually downloaded this fic some time ago but had another fic in mind i wanted to start next. So after i finished the last one (also really brilliant, i wrote a rec on it too), i started my e-reader the next day, THIS fic was already open instead on page 1. Huh?
I have absolutely no idea how this is possible, but i DO believe in hints-of-the-universe. Or little demonic miracles on their own. Because i needed this fic.
🩷Because of course - this is a Good Omens fanfic and eventually the other angel arrives. And without giving away to much: Aziraphale has to fight for Crowley. A long long time. He has to be steadfast and consistent and earn the trust of his has-been-companion-for-millenia. Nothing is a given any more.
And i am NOT saying that this is what Aziraphale needs to do or that he was wrong in any way. (The fic doesnt say that either by the way.) But what cracked ME personally about the last 15 was my own abandonement-wound which got triggered massively. I felt retraumatised even.
So reading and feeling that Crowley does not jump on the next best possibility to be back with the angel was a big thing. Having the Angel slowly earning his trust and simply showing up again and again - I needed that. I needed Crowley to take his time, not be the sick lovefool he is often proclaimed to be. For him to have doubts, to feel conflicted, to feel love and the need to self-preserve at the same time.
All these ambiguities we all have. And to take the steps with him. Watch the turning point, when the fear of losing Aziraphale again becomes less and less and the fear of wasting time gets stronger. Taking one step at a time, sometimes even backwards. All those things, typical for a healing process, which is never straight forward but most of the time a rollercoaster instead. I loved this. I needed this. I could sit back, breathe and watch my own heart grow. Just. Wow.
Most beloved quote:
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So if you feel like maybe you need a fic in which Aziraphale really shows up and cares while Crowley really takes his time to learn to trust again... And not because one of them has been an idiot, but to experience them both learning and growing together ... and that might be something for your own healing journey, this might be just THE fic for you. I absolutely loved it and so will you.
Reading is therapy! 🤗
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jules-ln · 1 day ago
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Ok you guys I went to sleep at 1 am and woke up at fucking 5 am to watch arcane so here are my thoughts/review:
After I finished it, first of all, I was mad lmao, then I thought about it for a moment and I started crying, but like ugly crying with sobs and everything because holy shit Jayce and Viktor, then I stopped crying, thought about it a bit more, and I got mad Again lmao
Now spoilers
It was a fucking mess lmao
Like seriously what the fuck fortiche, what the fuck Riot, it was such a fucking mess, it was all over the place, the story was rushed, the characters arcs were rushed, there was a lot of things that felt very forced because they didn't have time to let it happen naturally and I can tell a lot of things that would've been good were left in the inkpot
About Cait and Vi: I truly and honestly couldn't have care less about them lmao
I know I know
But I already fucking knew they were going to end up together that Vi was going to forgive Cait for being a fascist etc etc, for me their arc was already finished and I didn't have time to care about them because I was more worried about what the heck would happen to the other characters and how in hell would they wrap up that mess. If they would've cut all their scenes and gave that time to Mel or something, I would've been so fucking happy
Also, the sex scene annoyed me so much lmao, I was thinking "IF YOU WANTED A SEX SCENE YOU SHOULD'VE ADDED ANOTHER SEASON FORTICHE! WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THAT NOW!" lmao
Mel: I liked the concept of her arc, I like the theory, I can see their vision, what they were going for
But in reality it wasn't fucking that
Like, I like the idea of having Mel realize that she was much more than the daughter of her mother, that she had her own value for who she was instead of simply being the blood in her veins. But boy, it didn't feel at all like she realized that lmao
It just felt like she was "now I'm confident enough about myself to confront my mother because the writers said so" like what? This is what I mean when I say that a lot of things felt forced
Viktor: ok, ok I'm just like *heavy sigh*
To be honest part of why I was mad at first was Viktor's character, I was like "So what? You stop being a humanity loving pacifist to become a fucking control freak who hates free will and emotions just like that?" But then I thought about it, and if you frame his arc through Jayce, it actually made sense, because you see, everything he did was for Jayce. When he came back and went to build his cult, I mean, Commune, he was doing their hextech dream, the thing they always wanted, the thing Jayce always wanted
When Jayce went and rejected him by shooting him in the chest (thanks Jayce) he was hurt, he lashed out and wanted to get rid of all emotions, ironically it was a very emotional reaction. So then as soon as Jayce was back with him, he realized his mistake and stopped
So yeah, it makes sense, the problem is that I shouldn't have to stop and piece together a character motivation like that Fortiche what the hell. I know some people say "let the audience do some work!" But I feel like I'm doing all the fucking work here
What they did was great! Good! But just like Mel, give it more fucking time please
And the machine herald design was a bit ugly lmao, like his design in the game looks better, but thinking about it, and looking at the other robots design and how Viktor dresses in the series. I think it makes sense that this specific Viktor would design something like that
EDIT: Oh! I Also forgot to add:
My favorite scene of him was when Jayce was taking out all of those things one by one and Viktor waited until he was done to push them all back LMAO he didn't need to do that
Jayce:
Jayce, what the hell
Like, I understand why Viktor acted like he did, but like, what was up with you?
I mean, the end implied that he knew all along what was going to happen (machine herald, save Viktor etc), but like, why did he acted so angry at the commune then? He seemed so erratic and Angry like he didn't know what was going to happen, but he knew, and then he switched back to normal but like, what was up with all of what happened before? If anything, why didn't just he let Viktor get to the hexgate peacefully and then talk to him? Idk, it just seems to me like Jayce was the character the most affected by the crossfire of the plot happening because the writers had a very specific ending in mind and no time to get to that ending naturally
Also "hextech is bad" Then proceeds to let everyone keep using it lmao
Ambessa and Singed: of all the characters I think these one were the worst of all lmao
Like the plot completely changed Jayce and forced Mel, but like, these two just were put aside? Lmao
Everyone at Fortiche was like "Fuck Ambessa and Fuck Singed" which is a shame because these two were really interesting
Ekko and Jinx:
I think of all the other characters, these two were the best ones
I didn't feel like their arc was forced, it felt like they were given enough time, but you know why? Because their arc started in season 1, in this season they just finished it
The only thing I will complain about is Isha, because it just feels like they used her and completely discarded her after like a broken toy. Like Silco was waaay better handled than her
Heimmerdinger: I mean, I didn't care much about him lmao, he was only there because the plot needed him, and when he wasn't necessary anymore they got rid of him lmao
But it was less obvious than Isha at least
Viktor and Jayce: now, this is the part that got me fucking crying so much, and this along with Ekko and Jinx are the things that make me feel conflicted about this ending and not hate it as much as I would otherwise
It was all left ambiguous, and the cynical part of me thinks "of course they can't make it any more obvious because then the dude bros who main Viktor and Jayce in LoL are going to cry about how they don't want to play as a man who wants to kiss another man"
But if I take it at face value... Ngl guys, it was good
Like how Jayce chose Viktor after everything he did, how Viktor tried to push Jayce away to protect him but Jayce refused to leave, how all they wanted wasn't progress, or fame or power, but simply be together. And they got to be together in the end
Damn, I'm crying again
I JUST FUCKING WISH EVERYTHING AROUND IT WASN'T A MESS!
And I wanted to add, when everyone in Zaun went to help everyone in Piltover to deal with Ambessa, I wouldn't have done that, fuck them, they put a fucking fascist dictator on power, probably made a lot of people "dissappear" and just like that they are like "Guys, we're sorry, we need your help now :(" fuck that
In the end, it doesn't feel like Fortiche earned this ending. Season 2 should've ended with Arc 2, and Arc 3 should've been a whole season
And I can't give it a rating, because I don't know, I didn't like a lot of it, but there were some parts that I really fucking loved
But if someone asked me if it was worth to give the series a try, I would say yes, but don't get your hopes up for the ending lmao
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cr33pz-mck3nna · 2 days ago
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hi! could you please write jason the toymaker, laughing jack, and candypop for the yandere prompt?:3
YANDERE HEADCANONS WITH THE CARVINAL TRIO
Ft: My vers of Jason the Toymaker, Laughing Jack and Candy Pop(credits for the images to the OPs on Pinterest)
Jason the Toymaker
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Yandere level/intensity: 8/10
Love language: Giving gifts, physical touch, words of affirmation(receiving)
• Once this man lays his eyes on you it's over, they're never leaving you again
• He will disregard his job for you, has gotten in trouble with his fellow crps for this
• Once he has you he is never letting you leave, will whine if you have to go shopping and finds a reason to hate every last one of your friends
• If Slender was to find out about you and order your death his genuine response would be "Pardon me Slenderman sir..but I'd like to see you try."
• Started making you your favorite kind of toy(doll or stuffie) immediately after seeing you, would send them to you in a cliche "secret admirer" way, calls those toys in particular your children
• He would bring you around certain crps but would not bring you to live in the mansion, you would live in his workshop with him and his toys
• He would not trust you around the other two in the carnival trio, especially Jack, if you're ever around while they also are you are ALWAYS holding his hand, he trusts Candy around you if anything but Jack is a 100% no like..he'll never leave you alone with Candy, or anyone really, but he will not even allow you in the same building as Jack
• This man is possibly worse than Tobias when it comes to his self esteem and needs a constant stream of verbal and physical love to not loose his fucking mind due to his own thoughts
• His favorite time? Cuddle time of course! This man LOVES his physical attention, he's very anti touch with every person around him except for you so be prepared to have absolutely no personal space anymore, the bathroom will become your sanctuary-
• If you ever tried to leave him he would not be the type to kill you, not his precious, never his precious, he WOULD break your legs The Promised Neverland style tho and drag you home, best case scenario you learn to not run again, you heal and live happily ever after(kinda), worst case scenario though...he paralyzes you and takes you to Puppeteer for help turning you into a living doll, his now favorite doll.
Laughing Jack
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Yandere level/intensity: 10/10
Love language: Violence, Physical touch, Giving/Receiving gifts, Nicknames
• You were his victim, of course, Jack ain't one of the crps like Jason or a proxy who could've met you on casual terms y'know-
• If you were unphased by the deaths of your friends then that probably would've made him intruiged with you, if you were hiding your fear though...that would've made him even more intruiged
• I do hope you are not an empath because this man LOVES to see you cry, one way or another, finds your angry tears the most beautiful though
• Can be very rough with his physical attention, I'm not sure if you cried if that would make the situation better or worse for yourself
• As much as he loves seeing you cry if it's not caused by him WHOOO BOY whoever caused it better start saying their prayers
• If Slender found out about you and ordered your death, again, I see this man CACKLING HYSTERICALLY at Slender and anyone else around, like they actually have a fucking chance-
• Likes bringing you around the other crps because he knows none of them are dumb enough(except Jeff or BEN) to touch HIS human, will definitely keep you at the mansion because I don't see him liking the victims at his carnival seeing his posessionhis weakness
• Loves bringing you around Jason and Candy just to flaunt you like a prized dog he also loves having someone around while he calls the two colorful men all sorts of snide gay comments
• His idea of gifts are either candy, toys or human/animal body parts so..it's like a game of russian roulette every time he gives you a "gift", he is also the type that if he doesn't like your gift he will tell you to your face but secretly keep it forever
• Probably has a nickname for you like "flea" or "maggot" that he'll call you when around people but he definitely loves calling you "sweetheart"
• Now if you tried to leave then all bets are off. Of course, all humans are the same after all! He would immediately kill you, he spared you when he should've killed you alongside your friends and still you do this to him!? He would never speak of you again and his hatred for humans might be even worse this time
Candy Pop
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Yandere level/intensity 7/10
Love language: Quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation(giving), nicknames
• When he first saw you...nobody else did after that day- Absolutely is the impulsive Yandere who takes you immediately
• Absolutely a lovebomber but doesn't do it out of malice, honestly I don't think he knew he was yandere until you explained to him what that even was-
• A constant flow of emotional and physical attention attention from him, if you came from a very emotionally connected family then you immediately feel at home but if you had a more distant family who wasn't very loving then I wouldn't be surprised if early on you broke down in tears
• Probably the most loving yandere out of the three of them, will most probably accidentally give you stockholm and have you convinced it's a healthy relationship until you see Jeffrey walking by and get a MASSIVE reality check
• If Slender finds out about you and orders your death this man can and will drop every form of a life he has built with the crps and go off the grid with you, he is NOT taking any chances with your mortal life
• Will most definitely keep you in his dream dimension most of the time, if you want to go back to the human world he'll see if one of the boss's cabins are available
• He only brings you around Jason and Jack because he considers them his best "friends", if you felt uncomfortable around any one of themJack he would stop bringing you around them but if you took to one of them he would bring that one to you to hang out, so bring them to his dream dimension more
• Most favorite nicknames would probably be "sugar", "gumdrop", "honey bun" and "my love"
• This man does not trust ANYONE around you, somehow has more trust issues then Jason, though he'll allow people you trust around you
• Definitely the "pleaser" type of yandere, is never happy unless you are happy and will do anything to make you that way, even if it means making himself uncomfortable, anything for you
• Definitely has taken a kid or two as his newest "present" for you, will reluctantly return them if you ask him to, what can I say he loves playing house with you, gives him the closest feeling to what he thinks might be humanity
• This man has nightmares about loosing you and his dreams aren't much better as they're always filled with "What if's" about your relationship if he was human like you or you a monster like him
• If you tried to leave this could go one of two ways, he could finally snap and drag you back into his dream dimension, never letting you see the human world again and never letting you out of his sight, you don't have the right to do that anymore after breaking his trust, or he could let you go but believe me that till the day you die you'll never truly be alone again, he'll always be watching his love.
AHHH I LOVED THIS REQUEST! This was SO FUN to write and I hope y'all enjoy(and I hope this was sufficient enough to your request anon)! Sorry if any one of them is a little shorter than the others, I just wrote as much I could think of so I hope it's enough. Let me know if you want any more(or full fics, or a poly version of these headcanons) and remember requests are open just read the somewhat rules/introduction pinned on my page and maybe go read my list of characters and prompts if you don't have a very custom request. Tata for now my lovely little gremlins! -Creepz
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isaacthedruid · 3 days ago
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i wrote this weird little zombie poem/short story and for some reason my brain was supplying buck and eddie from 9-1-1 as the characters, so here’s the buddie cut of this stupid little story (trigger warnings of the normal zombie related media stuff<3)
my best friend died on thursday– car crash.
it’s saturday now but don’t cry for him, he was alive a few hours later. 
my best friend died on thursday– but i think he came back wrong.
i still don’t understand what happened, 
buck was in the hospital, in a coma and dead to the world. 
i was sat there with him, holding his limp hand in mine, 
his girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend) didn’t have the heart to show. 
he looked so small and pale, covered in bandages from head to toe. 
then his heart stopped, they couldn’t get it pumping again. 
they dragged me out of the room, to let them work. 
thursday, 1:17pm.
thursday, 3:34pm, buck called me. 
i hadn’t left the hospital, i thought it was some sick fucking joke. 
“my best friend just died, how fucking dare you-” i remember yelling into the phone. 
that certainly turned some heads but then he was standing there, 
my fucking dead best friend, in a hospital gown with bandages hung loosely off of him. 
what the fuck– i thought i was dreaming–
some fucked up grief induced hallucination but nurses were scrambling to help him. 
the person from the morgue was running down the hallway after him. 
all of them ushered him away, into an exam room. 
he was making a scene, apparently i was too. 
what the actual fuck- 
no, no, no- his heart stopped, all brain activity had died, he died-
anyways, i passed out. (thursday, i don’t know what time.)
i must have hit my head pretty hard on the way down
and there he was, sat like i had been earlier, holding my hand. 
his hand was cold, that pink that always flushed his skin hadn’t come back yet. 
the nurses had given him some clothes and me, a bandage for my head. 
“you died, buck..” i said.
“it didn’t stick,” he shrugged. 
they wanted to keep him for observation but he disagreed, seeing as he was perfectly fine. 
every scan was clear, even the random ones they pulled out of their asses to keep him longer.
my best friend who had just died, who earlier was more bandage than skin, was fine. 
i don’t get it but they discharged the both of us, 
we uber’d back to his place, he wouldn’t let me sleep on the couch, 
i can’t remember his reasoning but we shared his bed– i held him in my arms.
(we cuddled, not that either will actually admit it.)
friday, 8;13am, he was gone when i woke up. 
i found him downstairs, doubled over the toilet. 
the kitchen, a mess and food strewn out across the counters.
the ground beef (we were planning to cook for dinner) was torn into–
like an animal had got to it. he had eaten it, my brain supplied.
“don’t throw that away!” he said, wiping the bile from his mouth. 
“did you eat this?” i asked, the beef held frozen over the trash.
“i- you know the answer to that.” 
“why?” i sighed, rubbing at my temples and setting the half eaten- jesus- 
i sat the half eaten thing of ground beef back where i found it.
my best friend looked at it, pink and raw and ground, and then back to me, 
i wasn’t sure what buck was exactly getting at with that look. 
he scooped his fork into the beef, not breaking eye contact with me and took a bite. 
i nearly vomited but he seemed fine, unaffected,
which confused me given the initial vomiting on his part.
“what the actual fuck are you doing?” 
“what? i’m hungry,” he said with his mouthful.
“so, some raw meat was your choice of a nice breakfast?” 
“i cooked some eggs but they made me hurl.” 
“are you fucking serious, buck, and this? this isn’t making you sick?” 
“nope.” he answered matter-of-factly. 
friday, 7;46pm, he broke up with his girlfriend. 
his girlfriend of three years, the woman he was going to propose to next month. 
it’s kinda understandable as she didn’t visit him in the hospital when he literally died. 
other than that, the breakup came out of nowhere. broken up just like that.
she’d come to check on us– no, come to check on him. 
(we had an understanding. she didn’t like me and i didn’t like her either.) 
(she always said i was jealous of her which… i can’t fight her on.)
he was angry at her, rightfully so, and things got heated. 
she’d cheated on him, she revealed post-breakup. i shouldn’t have been listening–
but it was kinda hard to ignore when they were screaming at each other
and then she was screaming bloody murder. 
i ran into the kitchen, she was on the ground flailing and he was on top of her-
holy fucking shit, my best friend fucking bit her! 
he tore right through her neck and gnawed at her flesh. 
what the actual fuck was happening? holy fucking shit, this was actually happening. 
i pushed him off of her but she’d already bled out. 
“do you mind?” he asked, blood smeared across his face. coating his nose and chin.
“yes. i do mind! you- holy fucking shit, buck! are you crazy?” 
“i was hungry,” he said meekly. “also, she cheated on me and i-”
 “you didn’t have to eat her!” 
saturday, 1:02am, we buried the body in a field out in the middle of nowhere. 
we buried a body in the middle of nowhere.
no, we buried the bits and pieces that my best friend decided he didn’t want to eat.
what the actual fuck is my life turning into? 
“this better not become a habit of yours.” i sighed, dropping my shovel. 
“and what if it does?” buck smirked. 
“i’m not helping you bury more body parts.” 
“oh really?” 
“really.” i said, lying through my teeth.
it’s him and i til the end of the line, i’m his accomplice in this
and i wouldn’t have it any other way. 
“so, are you zombie?” i asked, starting up the truck. 
“i think so.” he replied, looking out the window. “are you okay with that?” 
“are you still, y’know, you?”
“i think so.” he repeated.
“then yeah…” i laughed, awkwardly as i often do. “as long as you don’t eat me.” 
“i wasn’t planning on it.” 
“i’m glad.” 
“besides, it would be kinda mean to eat you before i take you on a date.” 
“what-” 
“i’m serious, eddie.” 
“oh.” i blanched, “i’d like that.” 
oh. oh- oh my god? what the fuck is happening?
it’s not every day you get to bury a body with your best friend 
or burn evidence or scrub the kitchen down from top to bottom 
because he happened to decide he was craving human flesh. 
saturday, 7:30am, my boyfriend after a long conversation, took me out for breakfast. 
he was full, he’d just eaten an entire person minus the gallbladder and some bones
because apparently he’s like a cat who won’t eat every part of the mouse. 
i still don’t understand how this happened, he died,
became a honest to god zombie, he ate his cheating girlfriend, 
we buried her body, lied to the police and now, 
here, we are getting breakfast. 
how the fuck did i manage to get a boyfriend out of this…
it’s been a long two days.
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zukkaoru · 2 years ago
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finally. finally a jjk chapter didn't make me want to lie facedown in the middle of a highway
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angelsdean · 6 months ago
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ruthlessly deleting old 2021/2022 posts (not by me) from my dean studies tag like *click* un-incorporating that from my beliefs system! also the way SO many posts have me like ok uh-huh good aaand then say one completely wrong thing that loses me. it's so many posts.
#it's usually when they randomly drop some line of fanon. like saying dean has never admitted to being wrong in his life#or never expressed an emotion or been vulnerable or doesn't Talk About Feelings or is super duper RepressedTM#like i'm sorry. have you watched the show. oh and have you taken off the sammy POV goggles first?#bc this guy is always crying and being vulnerable and talking about his feelings. he is self-aware.#he may not always want to talk to sam abt things! but he sure does talk about things with other people#do i need to reblog the compilation posts AGAIN?#(also re: his sexualiy? AWARE. sorry i saw him flirt and be flustered by so many men. he knows how he feels.)#and then 'first time ever admitting to being wrong' this one came from a post abt dean's prayer in the trap#like i'm sorry but first of all. dean apologizes more than any other character on the show. there are hard numbers on this.#people have tracked this on spreadsheets. i think ilarual is one of them.#and often he is apologizing for things that aren't even his fault! but he still feels responsible for bc he's been made to feel that way#his whole life!!#other characters *cough samandcas *cough* apologizing Less doesn't mean they've Done less things wrong#it just means they're not owning up to it and brushing it under the rug. something both do frequently.#anyways. aside from apologies. dean also has no problem admitting he's wrong y'know when he's actually wrong#which is less often than you'd think bc he has pretty good instincts and intuition and often suspects things which turn out to be Right#but anyways. another thing abt the trap prayer is. i don't think cas Needed to be forgiven#i think dean was justified in feeling angry w cas over the circumstances leading to the Death of His Mother! totally normal grief response!#i think cas also understands dean to be someone who needs time to process and deal with his feelings (he says as much to jack)#however. despite me not think dean Needs to forgive cas. the thing is. with dean when it comes to cas the forgiveness is implicit#when he says /of course i forgive you/ and in the cut like /of course i wanted you to stay/ like. yes he was mad and dealing with grief#but also. yes cas was already forgiven even back then. he just needed Time to work through the feelings#anyways i think dean says he 'forgives' cas bc it's what CAS needed to hear to stop feeling guilty and dean gives him that closure#but i also think cas was already forgiven even in dean's anger. he wants him there always. i'd rather have you. we can fix this. etc etc#a lot of tags for a non-rebloggable post ajksdfs maybe i'll make these into a real post sometime#vic.txt#dean and feelings#so i can find this all again later
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seaofreverie · 2 months ago
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First day back at the university and I still suck at this exactly as much as I did 4 years ago
#i wish doing something over and over actually made it easier from then on#how come i've done this so many times and i'm still as horrified by the prospect of group projects and exams and all as in the very start#can they invent a higher education that doesn't require you to prepare a group project for every damn subject that exists#can they also invent an intercating with people#in a way that doesn't leave me feeling like the only person on earth who somehow doesn't get it#how do people just start talking and becoming friends :( it's literally impossible for me#it's such a mystery. how the hell do they all do this. what's your fucking secret !!!!!!!!!#not that i expected to become friends with anyone in one day#but one day was already enough for me to start feeling as alienated and othered from everyone else as i've always felt#like god it's always the same damn thing. each year i hope it'll be different and it's still the fucking same#i try to appear nice and approachable and chime in to the conversation whenever i can (just like i've been doing for the past 4 years)#but i guess there must just be something deeply wrong with me that makes everyone avoid me in the end anyway#am i really that unfriendable. can anyone tell me what i'm doing wrong#and why no one is interested in holding a conversation with me for more than 5 minutes in total#it's literally back to the same thing that i've done over and over before and i truly don't see any point in any of this anymore#it's just so ridiculous 😭😭😭 why do i even keep trying at this point#back to school so back to crying alone in my room every evening i guess#how beautiful how poetic. i almost forgot this was the daily standard for the entire past year#never getting out of this ok i get it :))#friendship was meant to be for everyone but me i get it now!!!#worst year ever everything bad is happening. going to my first funeral on thursday i'm definitely going to take that well hahaha#it's been only a day and i'm already so done. ok.#i'm freaking out man what am i even supposed to be doing anymore. it's all pointless
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alwaysoc · 7 months ago
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#YES! GIVE ME THAT FANFIC ANGST!#IT'LL MAKE ME CRY BUT IT'S WORTH IT!#it's just so rare to see Katarina so self-depricating in the first place#but now she has good reason to be#if I was her I would be too!#Hamefura#honestly On The Verge of Doom is SO much better than I thought it would be!#like new plot#new struggles#Katarina's done a lot of horrid things but she's desperately trying to make up for them#hustle hustle hustle!#my poor baby doesn't have a big harem that she personally helped to rely on#like Alan and Keith (Keith especially) are such DIFFERENT people!#Alan Nicol and Sophia hardly appear#and only Geordo (and maybe Mary and Maria) seem to actually be lovestruck and that isn't until towards the end#this means that lots of the characters also act differently with each other!#Keith and Geordo don't have a rivalry and it's more of like a “Keep her safe will you?”#we get more insight into Maria being all insecure and don't see her mother at all#because even if Katarina still wanted to see how real fields looked#she wouldn't have any reason to go to Maria's hometown if she feels like she's made Maria suffer so heavily!#which makes sense#I adore that there's more focus on sword fighting too!#also Sienna is the sweetest baby ever! it's a shame that she doesn't appear at all in canon but it makes sense#anyway! yes! Verge of Doom is good!#I finished it all in one four-hour take!#I wouldn't mind getting maybe an anime spin-off based on Verge of Doom#goooosh! I love it! I'm going to go read some fluffy fanfic stuff now!
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the-acid-pear · 7 months ago
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I never tried the option myself bc it'd probably mean skipping the Reason You Suck speech at the end (fire for speedrunners though) but I Love that you can frame your Phoneys in 3, especially so if you've already killed the previous two. Like yeah couldn't send you off to die so i'll let the goverment do it for me 🧸 like its just Peak evil imo.
#luly talks#i do relinquish in the pain and the agony but dont get me wrong the thought of any of them 3 getting jailed makes me SO sad#rog esp since he's the one im writing about and the biggest nerve wreck#gingi voice they'll be the last one to pick the board game for prison-game-night..........#actually yknow i wonder if rog would end up almost believing it after all when you try to gaslight him for the shits and giggles#(as in: telling HE was victim of the bite of 87 and the like) he tells you to not do that bc his brain is already scrambled or something#so there's a chance perhaps he'd believe it if he had everyone constantly accussing him of it?#not like it'd matter much i have no hopes for the dsaf justice system i know its been 35 years since jack got framed but still#i just remembered when the option popped up i said ''god im really becoming steven 😭''#first time i made the joke too was when i said ''imagine your boss sucks so bad you turn suicidal'' no clue what the context was#OH YEAH JAKE SAYING HE'D RATHER FUCKING DIE THAN KEEP WORKING HERE yeah. poor guy.#anyway im derailing my own post again uhhh. yeah. yeah i dont trust any phoney is avoiding the death sentence#dsaf#roger jones#dsaf roger#btw just for the sake of yapping longer i truly cant decide whether harry or jake would survive better in the enviroment#probably jake to be honest. I mean Harry has a lot of experience inside freddy's but he didnt really live outside it muhc#jake is so confrontational though#hey did you guys watch the hit movie felon? sure that guy wasn't framed but. i feel like jake would end up w that attitude#except for. you know. everything else that happens in the hit movie felon.#hey actually forget about this game go watch the 10/10 movie Felon from 2008 starring Val Kilmer and Stephen Dorff#because its one of my all time fave movies and probably the saddest i've seen#not bc there arent movies that are more tragic but bc no movie was able to break thru my walls of idgaf and make me cry anyway#yeah you thought i couldnt bring up my movie fixations on my different fandom posts well you were WRONG in fact#im gonna go tag my other post i left untagged yesterday bc my ass was Cooking
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Spoke to someone I don’t know over the phone, 11 dead, 32 injured
#I’m all flowery on here but in real life conversation I am the driest most uncomfortably pragmatic person alive#I’ve been scolded for being so task-focused that I forgot to say hello to the secretaries in high school when I went to do a task#or for having an “attitude” with my parents (often when I was purposefully trying to appear humble with an “idk” voice)#so I’ve amended that by fake laughing at everything and keeping my customer service voice on All The Time#0/10 it works flawlessly but I’ve also made myself into a socially anxious doormat#I’ve been the one to break it to people that their friend died on more than one occasion and I always feel bad about how I do it#I usually just blurt it out because I don’t know how to lead up to it other than saying “maybe you should sit down for this”#it would be wrong if I knew and didn’t tell them#so it has to be me… you know?#I’m so disconnected from any feelings of grief (I’ve never felt bereavement in my life) that it feels wrong for it to be me#because I’m physically incapable of sharing in their pain and emotions; I literally don’t understand it#but sometimes I’ll cry reflexively if I see someone else crying even if I don’t have any actual feelings for them or their situation#I’m more disturbed by knowing of people who are alive going through pain than I am by knowing someone died#because death is natural; suffering isn’t#unless the person is a child or otherwise very young#but if they’re old and lived a fulfilling life I recognize they’ve had a fulfilling life and hope that my life#is as fulfilling as theirs was when I go#I’m not afraid of death; I’d just like to not go before I’m good and ready#When I go away I hope that I WANT to go away; you know?
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thedevotionaltour · 8 months ago
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thinking about daredevil yellow again im not. going to make it Guys.
#static.soundz#crying screaming and hitting the ground. so good. it made me cry really bad#bc whenever i think about jack n matt it always makes me think of me n my dad for various reasons#when matt said i couldnt feel his heartbeat inside me anymore. no words.#i rambled about it on my main but dd is very much intwined in an interesting and special way with my own heavy grief about my dad#and matt was a very important character to me during that time of my life for the exact same reason.#it's why i take a lot of very heavy issue when things try to make it so his dad died in his childhood as opposed to college#bc a) think it takes away a lot of the important nature of their relationship and b) my own personal projection#bc all grief at any stage is highly personal and unique and particular#but it really does feel like. matt is really just starting to become an adult (depending whether he dies when matt's in under or post grad)#(bc i can never remember which) but he's not quite a mega established one. there's still that lingering of childhood#so even though he's grown. it just hurts in a very particular way. they saw you grow up. but they didnt really see you become an adult.#they did not see the person you're going to be. that you are. that you're becoming. it feels like such a bizarre unfair moment in time.#bc why now? why not when i was younger? why not when i was truly an adult adult who is expecting to lose you now?#why at this moment and no other time?#but thinking about matt going i wish i told my dad how much i loved him.#more than anything when he goes 'i love you dad. did you hear? i love you.'#it made me cry like a fucking bitch. honest to god tearing up when i type about it. it wrenches my heart it twists it and it makes me wanna#drop to my knees and just weep and weep and weep. they are everything to me.#i have intertwined a lot of matt's grief with mine in a way that makes him so so so important to me. because as stupid as it fucking sounds#that comic and him as a character are everything to me. so genuinely. they were a lifeline my freshman year#when i was so depressed all i could do was read comics. or listen to music#i could do nothing else. i did. clearly. i did work and assignments. but dd was everything to me alongside dm#im sorry i am being an actual like nutbag in my tags im sorry i just have a lot of feelings. this story is everything to me ever ok? ok.
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emypony · 1 year ago
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#damn babygirl i wish people checked up on me more#this self conscious catgirl is so tired#sometimes i WISH people just came into my dms to ask me if im ok#i do it constantly to others because i hope theyre not as sad as i am feeling in that moment#genuinely afraid to have made someone feel bad and drive them away from me#and omg i feel nyself running thin again just bc im afraid to lose the interactions we have altogether because i cant process certain media#in a healthy way whatsoever and i get super hung up on thinfs that really dont matter that much in the end#YEAH IM RAMBLING IT'S 5:30 AM AND I COULD BE SLEEPING RIGHT NOW BUT INSTEAD IM JUST CRYING FOR A STUPID REASON!!#i think ive only had one person check up on me based off the vibes in chat i gave off alone in the past couple of months#which was baffling and surreal btw and i think it broke something within me#it came from someone i wouldve never expected to even notice because sometimes it feels like its such a vast difference between us#i sometimes even wonder how are we friends in the first place#like do i even deserve to call this person my friend do they feel like that? or are we just discord acquaintances?#anyway all this just made me sad and my dumb ass is crying and yearning to be loved by my online peers thats all lol. meows pathetically#idk i guess i just.want to hear / see it more rather than just teying to tell myself that over and over hoping im not deluding myself abt i#personal#sorry for the emotions dump idk whats wrong with me tonight actually#me having to come to terms with the reality that i actually have a following and this might get boticed by more than 2 ppl#bc not everyone follows 3k blogs like i am :skull emoji: yknow#im probably gonna delete later because im actually a super self conscious person to the point i get nauseatingly anxious about it holy shit#i dont vent often and im 120% keeping it in but when i do oh boy#the dam bursts and im left like a sopping wet dog on the floor looking like a sad blob#which i am feeling like right now!#vent#emy rambles#ALSO LIKE THIS ISNT TO SAY IM NOT GRATEFUL FOR MY FRIENDS OMG I AM#k really am#sometimes its still like. idk. unbelievable to me that people are genuinely interacting with me and the things i write or headcanon#and i shouldn't expect them to know whats wrong with me or if i feel bad if i dont say it or communicate that to them#but yknow one can yearn
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