#and this is me TRYING not to write the essay i wanna write fr!
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i need matt in that jury so bad so i can stop being subjected to these annoying ass, infantilizing takes from both fans and the other players. his refusal to play his own game being twisted into 'poor matty is being taken advantage of by the evil monster jag' is so unserious.
#bb25#jag is a fucking clown right now but i'm tired of that white freak getting babied in comparison.#ever since felicia nutty ass said she trusts him because he reads the bible i've wanted his ass out.#all these takes acting like matt putting a number for himself on the block on HIS hoh is something matt is the 'victim' of#rather than something completely fucking stupid he literally didn't have to do.#or pretending he wasn't throwing cirie utb to jag for that matter. he ACTIVELY helped jag evict her.#like yeah matt IS jag's puppet lmfao.#but if matt isn't responsible for anything and is just a vessel for the manipulative monster jag - then he doesn't deserve shit!#and this is me TRYING not to write the essay i wanna write fr!
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A case for a pairing: Jack Quinn/JJ Peterka, the case is literally just their speed dating video. Addendums include JJ’s unusually in-depth skin care routine and a handful of other videos the Sabres social team has paired them up for.
JJ is cocky and German and makes Jack blush. Jack thinks he’s a comedian (he’s not that funny). They played together in the AHL and for the last couple of years they’ve both been up with the big team. The Sabres are a fascinating mix of tragic and whimsical.
I have been trying my damndest to get the tag humming but perpetually want more of them.
(with that said? You’ve gotten me hooked on NateJo so it’s not like I want you to stop there)
wait I love them
JJ knowing what arabiatta is was my favorite part of the video. but why does he have two phones???
okay so I'm 4 sure intrigued but like. what're their personalities?? Like I could write you a formal essay on Nate and Jo's characterizations....not asking you to do that here, but on a Nate and Jo spectrum of intensity and sweetness, where do they each fall?
but fr they wanna kiss so bad?? JJ's eye contact???
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{Oof, really wish I had the Brain Power to delve deeper into Boothill & his ideals/philosophy bc I know I'd write a heckin essay, regarding the differences between justice & revenge, how he perceives them, & how far he's willing to go- Like, fr, there's so much I wanna ramble abt & dive deeper into for Boothill, bc he's such an interesting character to me, bc he does have depth beyond the Silly Chaos Man. Reading through his voicelines (both general & combat) and other sources can really give off a lot in terms of characterization. Like how he adamantly refuses to use the money he steals from those he "doesn't like" for pleasure, he knows that money is from "ill-gotten gains", so why bother using it for something that could benefit him. I can easily see him using it to help benefit others instead of himself. Bc, well, why would a dead man need money? Then, his "return to battle" line, how almost scared/relieved he sounded. Which leads me to believe, he does have a slight fear of actually falling in any fights, esp if you think abt him being the sole one carrying his family/culture's/home's memory. If he fell, he may as well lose it all all over again. Bc there'd be no one out there trying to get the proper justice. He's actually really selfless, clever, and has been through more than a fair share of suffering. I just... wish I had the spoons to really dig into his characterization & explore him-}
#★ ⸻ 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐂𝐘𝐎𝐍 : 𝐨𝐨𝐜#{I should just make BH his own blog at this rate- Been thinking abt it for him & Dainsleif-}
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iwbft — thursday: a brief summary of my annotations
all highlighted quotes: 135
· ouch/ow/owie: 7
· real/felt/relatable/so true: 0
· aroace: 0
· ☹/☹☹/☹☹☹: 3
I like knowing that I've been there since the beginning. — lol hipster... me w BiT tho
I can't stop myself laughing, trapped under the cape, and I catch a glimpse of Lister grinning at me, a soft smile, one that reminds me of years ago, back when this was all new and exciting and fun, back when we really were children. — god i love this bit . it is so gentle and tender
People are coming up with some hilarious explanations for the Jowan photo and the Rowan/Bliss reveal, such as it's a ploy by their management, out to stir up some extra publicity to keep attention on The Ark [...] — devastating phrasing for rpf shippers everywhere
it didn't destroy me in the way I thought it would when the news eventually came that Jowan, love itself, wasn't real.. Maybe I sort of knew it was a lie all along. — 10 points for recognising that rpf ships aren't real, -2 for the nihilistic depressive worldview . get therapy x
Unpleasant phone call? Yesterday morning? I heard nothing about that. — well u definitely heard Hints but i'll let u off due to the autism x
Playing our songs when the entire audience is empty is always a laugh, because we're just playing for ourselves, and we can deliberately get stuff wrong and play games like Lister trying to get us out of time and Rowan adding in harmonies where there aren't normally and me changing the lyrics of our most famous songs. — i'd die for them fr LET THESE BOYS HAVE FUN MORE OFTEN
every time the laughing stops his expression drops and he looks like he's about to cry. — me when i leave my friend's house & the mental illness comes back
He just leans in and kisses me. My stomach lurches. Not because I'm excited, but because I'm shocked and I'm getting flashbacks of the last time I did this. Never my idea, is it? I want to, I want to kiss a boy in some dramatic way but I don't too, not when it doesn't feel right. — ☹ bad parallel
You think you've got it all sorted but you don't! You're just the same as me. You're both just as bad as I am. — ,,,,, he's not far wrong tbf
'You don't have to... like me back,' he says, and his voice breaks but I can't tell whether he's laughing or trying not to cry. 'But please don't hate me.' — AGONY (note: this is written in huge letters)
I thought the three of us would be friends forever. I can't deal with these unsaid feelings. I don't want to know about them. I don't want to think about them. — kick me in the cooch it'd hurt less
'Everything's bad.' 'Nothing bad is going to happen to you.' But it feels like it is. 'I am not afraid,' says Rowan softly. 'Remember?' — KILL ME OFF (note: this is written in huge letters)
I'm gone, I'm already gone, I'm up above the three of us and gazing down at the three bodies and wondering who on Earth decided that these three pathetically flawed human beings deserved so much worship. — i wanna write an essay on depersonalisation in jimmy's narration
Jimmy's smile is so wide - a youthful, dreamlike grin - as he gazes over the crowd — to the tune of the maybelline jingle: maybe it's a youthful dreamlike grin, maybe it's dissociation
There is something inexplicable tying them together. — it's trauma
Most fans would defend them until their last breath, form an army to keep them from harm or discomfort. — can't speak to how deliberate this was but . army in the bts sense is a fun connection
I didn't get to meet The Ark. I didn't get to tell them anything. — give it a day luv x
I am dragged into the flood. — BORN TO SURVIVE THE STORM BORN TO SURVIVE THE FLOOD
He doesn't look like himself without the airy smile that I always see in the photos and videos. — false! he looks more like himself then you've ever seen!
Of course he looks impossibly beautiful too. I desperately want to hold him. — NOT THE TIME
He's afraid of me. Me. Me. The human embodiment of a caterpillar. — something something self perception vs other ppl's perception, parallels the fandom vs celebrity experience something something
His eyes are wide and fearful. The beauty that I'd admired there has gone. — he's becoming real...
It just makes me feel like I'm really here. Holding this piece of me in my hand. — depersonalisation & grounding .......
God, I want to hug him. I want to hold him and let him cry gently into my shoulder. — not the time for a wattpad self-insert y/n imagine queen
I just stop registering what's happening around me. It's not really happening to me. It's all just happening to this body that people call Jimmy Kaga-Ricci. — depersonalisation!!!!!
It's funny because it's true. — TORI?
'I'm not in here any more,' I say, pointing at my chest. 'This is all happening to someone else.' 'Are you... okay?' I laugh at him again. — depersonalisation (note: this is in big letters and double underlined)
I'm sure that when The Ark arrive, I'll feel happy. I know that when The Ark arrive, I will feel happy. — ow . it's almost like relying on external factors to fix ur mental health is like a plaster on a bullet hole
I'm sure that when we start playing, I'll feel happy. — they're so nsync
Why do I feel like he's died when he's right there in front of me? — because you loved a fantasy and now reality has kicked in amen
I just turn back and stare up at them, waiting, praying for something good to happen, something good to make me feel okay again, just as it always has until today. But I don't feel anything. — yeah yeah the emotional void we all know it
— future college/uni essay idea: religion vs fandom with a specific focus on the osemanverse/hstv fandom w iwbft & rs as backup
#posting this at 4am friday bc i was toddler sitting all afternoon and then Wiped Tf Out w a pain & fatigue wave all evening#but heyyyy to those of u that check the tag like the morning paper#iwbftreread#side note i should've added a counter for how many bastard times i reference depersonalisation#a job for a future reread i think#also that final one isn't tied to a specific quote i just find it interesting . bc the way the exact fandom toxicity alice has been —#— exploring in their work for years has started playing out in (some parts) of the hs fandom is so interesting to me#also infuriating . but also i find the most interesting things tend to also be a fair bit infuriating
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Proof that it’s not just “anonymous people with no evidence” 😑
Sooo like i dunno how to explain what should be common sense but ima try anyway!
Anybody can make new accounts and write up long posts saying “oh no you got it all wrong 🥺🥺🥺.”
Making accounts and using those accounts to repeat the same exact claim, screenshotting publicly available posts and sending them to me is not evidence
If you wrote a research essay this way, you’d fail that assignment so hard. Believe me, I’ve written plenty of papers ✨
If you claim her to be unkind, rude, toxic, whatever you wanna call her based on your interactions, you should post those interactions. This is what bambinella did to show evidence to suggest “ticklee25” may be the person behind the anon hate.
Funny enough… I think you just created more reason to believe that @bambinella ‘s already evidenced claimed of ticklee25 being the person behind the anon hate is true 🤣
If you show me Actual evidence (dms with her, herself actually saying those things you claim she said/did) then maybe people in the community would actually take you serious 😶
TL;DR
womp womp ima give Bambinella an extra follower
L + Ratio
lame non-evidence
get therapy, stop hating
just stop being mean to ppl fr, people don’t take kindly to you attacking someone who hasn’t been evidenced to be bad
enjoying all the attention im giving you here? A response is what you wanted right? Further responses shall be deleted, k thanks <3
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a messy rant talk cuz am angy
bruh, osc twitter is so fnckin toxic like, they just gave me extreme trust issues that i just start to not follow or even interact with anyone outside of my friend circle immediately even if they art is cool and chet cuz whenever i interact with anyone (like follow, reply or somthin) they will go and block me bcuz someone tells them that i did something bad without even knowing what it is, yet they believe them like they know me better
and the only thing i did was ship knife and mic, ive known that the siblings hc is everywhere and i asked allot of times why its so popular, yet no one is telling me so i did my own search about it but noooo they be harassing and spamming me in quote retweets and calling me out and chet for an info that a newcomer wouldnt know instead of just dm-ing me,, they fr had to tell the public about it
like bro, i just joined not even a year in, just a month in, yet they harassing me like ive been here since day one
and might i let you know that the “proof” they be spamming me is almost a decade old, like, they didnt even ask the person if theyre still okay with it or not, a friend of mine has to ask them about it and guess what, he doesnt even mind it anymore
and then them saying “we reached out to burgy but they did nothing” like??? did my thread that i did and deleting the microknife art mean nothing?? even if the person said that its not even a big deal anymore?? yall need to get more info than just info that’s decades ago cuz like, you do know people change right?
and just cuz i posted that thread a day late cuz like bro, i was tryna write it as clear as possible yet that is nothing to you???
like yeah, i blocked some people but they were spamming and harrassing the frick out of me and chet like dude, i get it, your proof is a decade old, try and see if its still accurate sheesh, shut up, i have never blocked anyone unless theyre being annoying, and thats what i did, i unblocked them a few days later
and now its about the GKGG au??? like bro, it’s an au, obviously its different from canon, and now bcuz of that, my friend has to do an explanation about it here even if it’s so obviously obvious (they even explained there on twitter that the backstory is different from canon, but i guess they don’t know how to read)
haysst
i am so glad that i decide to just keave twitter, ive been wanting to leave twitter since a long time ago cuz i dont even know what to do with it than just like my friends’ & brother’s post and funny retweets and CoryxKenshin says to follow him on twitter/hj
and now, i finally dumped that bird app on the trash cuz, my dash was so full of osc people that i dont even want to interact cuz my gosh, every week is just full of callouts and stuff,and like, they just be bringing up old drama, like even if the person theyre calling out is trying to change and chet or just even the drama was like months or years ago, they be bringing it up like its nothing, like the person didnt apologized and stuff, and what’s worse, people believes the one who did the callout post, they didnt look if what theyre saying is true or not like dude, whats worse is if it’s a fresh wound and the person is trying to change, but i guess the osc twitter doesnt understand the word “sorry” even if you did a whole essay about how sorry you are, it’s like they dont even wait for the other half side of the story bro
two months in knowing and drawing ii and the osc twitter was so toxic like bro, i dont think i can handle years being there, let alone just a month like sheesh
aight
here’s a old random sketch of Katie and a oc named Erick from my tlm superhero au as a, i dunno, a thank you i guess? if you took the time to read all dat, i dunno
i wanna draw more of them,,
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(I’m not sure if this sent the first time or not, so I’m sending it again jus to be safe lol)
• What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why?
Let Me Down Easy by Gang of Youths; can’t even pick a lyric because I adore the whole song too much. It all resonates with me (and it’s extremely catchy).
• What is your Enneagram type?
6w5. INFJ-T for Myer Briggs.
• Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why?
I’m most productive when I put them on for background noise while I complete tasks, but I often don’t even remember what the video is on because I accidentally tune it out lol.
• Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend.
Never had one. I loved making storylines with plot in my head instead of a singular imaginary friend.
• What is your go-to way to fall asleep?
In clothes twice my size with hot herbal tea, reading/drawing until my eyes get tired.
• If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?)
Am I allowed to say that I wouldn’t? I often poke fun of my name for its uniqueness, but I’ve fought hard to reclaim it as my own after hearing it he used in such a negative light growing up. I also just like that I’m named after a mountain :)
• What is your favorite of Redacted's audios, and why?
Imperium storyline. I love the complexity and depth of it all, and hearing beloved characters have to navigate such a awful world such as the Imperiums is fascinating to me. And the sound design FUCKS it’s insane.
• What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don't get the hype for.
Vincent. I appreciate the purpose that his character serves, and I genuinely love all of the characters, don’t get me wrong, but he just doesn’t do it for me like how he does for others. I’ve been enjoying seeing his character w/ this summit stuff, however! Maybe I was just getting bored of him?
• Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to.
Twilight series. It’s so stupid and awful and perfect in all the right and wrong ways. It makes me laugh, and I love poking fun of it.
• Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend?
Huxley. I know in my heart of hearts that we’d bond over so many things. I wanna pick at his brain fr
• Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you're tired, and if so, what is it?
Childhood memories/stories. I guess it doesn’t feel all too easy to share them when I’m in my right mind, but when I get sleepy, it feels nice peel back the curtain for a while.
• Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo.
Uh uhhh uhhh uhmmm something sweet with a vitamin water?
• Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment.
Assuming you mean music, my favorite atm is one I made for a redacted OC of mine. He is lovely and I’ve been trying to discover more music that matches his taste.
• What's your guilty pleasure media, and why?
Audio roleplay channels all the way. I love creating characters and putting my imagination to use.
• And whatever else you think tells me about who you are!
Lover of all things nature and stars. Graduated w/ my masters in Alternative Medicine & Holistic Healing. I feel a deep personal/spiritual connection with water, and I’ve been told that I don’t play very well with others. I don’t have much to say with my spoken words, yet reading and writing are beloved hobbies of mine :)
This took me a second- not because it’s not obvious but because this is a boy I don’t think about often, I’ll be real with you. Then I checked the March Redactedness brackets, and I knew- it’s gotta be you and Camelopardalis.
It’s such a definite match; like, everything about you would work so well with him. Your personality types reveal a positive, thoughtful, compassionate person, as does your work in Holistic medicine, and that’s exactly the type of personality that would sit well next to a Serenity daemon. That’s not even mentioning the love of water, nature, reading, and tea which also just strike me as very Cam things to love; like, you would love so many of the same things and share so many hobbies.
I bet you’d have a great house together with either a bursting, varied tea cupboard or a drawer stocked full of the specific kind you two like. You’d have so many books and shelves, and I like to imagine Cam reading some of them to you. That’d be such a treat for him. Outside the home, y’all would go out in nature loads- maybe hiking or just peaceful walks? They’d be so serene and sweet, the two of you holding hands and picking flowers, Cam helping you keep your footing.
Song:
You've been hiding in plain sight, and it appeared, oh I know/ Loving you once only feels wrong, I need you/ I always knew I'd find you, to be here is worth the wait to/ I'm not lying when I say, "I've been stuck by the glue onto you"
Admittedly, I picked the song by vibes. The lyrics are cute, of course, and I always make sure to choose love songs, but the lyrics weren’t as important as the feel. I wanted a song that would be perfect for a little afternoon stroll with your beloved, not too slow or fast, not sad but sweet and light and a little bouncy.
Runner-Ups:
Other attributes of your personality type suggested you to be cautious, loyal, and ambitious which is why I’m giving you James as a runner-up. I almost imagine him exclusively a coffee drinker, so pairing him with a tea person is fun and a little silly. The way you say you’ve been told you don’t play well with others was also fun and gave me Smartass-vibes which led me to give you Aaron as your second runner-up, in addition to the fact he could really use a partner to get him out in nature.
note: thank you for waiting and sending in an entry 💜
Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌
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Hello!! Im really really sorry if im disturbing u or anything but i wanted to request a matchup of thats ok😭
Since I saw that they were open, I'd like to request a twst matchup^^ be warned my grammar is really eurghgh bad😢😢
So starting off with my personality,, Im an enfp, 7w6, scorpio sun, cancer moon, and sagittarius rising!
Im honestly a really fun and charming person to be with -said pretty much everyone i know
But even though I'm fun to be with, i can lowk be pretty annoying😭 But shoving that aside, Im really caring, really motherly tbh. Ive sorta been a personal nurse AND doctor for my friends - and family members when they were sick - as a child and now. Im kinda like,, a duplicate of emu otori and mizuki akiyama from pjsk..!
I can always cheer anyone up, jokes, comforting words, anything! I always try my best to make people happy,, honestly kind of a people pleaser but whatever!
My friends tell me I remind them of a goldfish, so they just call me "the celestial goldfish of (gc name)"
VERY soft hearted person😞
Im really good with children somehow.. I dont even know how but yeah - somehow,, babies cry whenever i leave the room😭 so pretty much - im a good babysitter err aunt! I guess!
My love language is probably physical touch,, i always want to kiss my lovers cheeks, and hold their hands! Im asexual though so im like- really uncomfortable if it gets mistaken for something sexual😭😭
I also love giving gifts to my friends even though im broke asf
Buuuuuut moving on - what abt my interests, hobbies??
I love astronomy so so much, and stargaze whenever given the chance! I've memorized like 10 constellations in the spam of 5 minutes since i have a photographic memory (even when i have the memory span of a goldfish,, wow)
I also love art! Sculpting, painting, music (that counts right?) Anything.. It calms me so so much i just love it😍😍
I also like gaming, even if i dont game as much anymore.. Im honestly so pro at every game i swear💯💯💯‼️‼️‼️
I also like collecting anything and everything. Plushies, sea shells, dolls, make up, mirrors.. No wonder im poor damn
i love listening to music too, i mean who doesnt!! Stan twice and yousei teikoku (lob their music sm)
I also like reading, and writing too! I mostly read and write poetry, sometimes i cry because i relate to it though huhu..
I also love love loveee shopping, especially with friends! I also buy atleast 1 or 2 plush(ies) whenever i go shopping because of my unhealthy obsession with them😔🤞
So liek after i just told u all of that pls let me tell u random stuff abt me🥰🥰
I usually get into fights (depending on my mood tbh) and end up just dating the person i was fighting😭 (enemies 2 lovers fr)
I dress in lolita fashion!! Mostly sweet lolita, but i dress in gothic lolita at times!
I am an energy ball,, no, i am a rain cloud looking to ruin someones day,, no, i am both.
I honestly love rainy days sm😍😍 sometimes i like it when its kinda stormy, but where im from were more prone to floods so keyword SOMETIMES😭
I totally give off black cat, introvert, loner, emo vibes at first glance but i am the total opposite. I WILL BECOME UR BEST FRIEND IN LIKE THE SPAN OF A MINUTE
Even though im more extroverted, and energetic, im sort of a calm person tbh. The perfect person to go to if you wanna have fun or just calm down!
I actually like being more educated on true crime, reding them.. That stuff.. It usually just ends up in me being more uhhmm dead inside tbh😭
I AM THE BULLYING TARGET 4 ALL OF MY FRIENDS PLZ HELP😔😔
I give people the weirdest nicknames, and they do too - like.. "Goldfish" "voodoo doll seller" "kulangot at boga seller" there are weirder stuff but atp it would just become a whole 29739373837386383937392729 word essay😟😟
I adopt introverts, and become their bestie, so we sorta just become the sun and moon trope😭
Anyways,, im just gonna tell u my type now😍😍 beware since this is gonna be long (i have like 17 crushes who are all the different person with waaay different personalities)
INTROVERTS NA SUPER SOBRA ULTRA CUTE GWAPO POGI GANDA AUGGGHGH LOVE THEM SOOO MUCH THEY MAKE MY HEART BEAT 100x FASTER❤❤
ppl with the same vibe as me. Me and that other person r gonna be commiting arson probably /jj
Confident ppl that give of "gege ml boy who plays basketball for a living"
INTROVERTS W/ THE SAME INTEREST AS ME💯💯
Practically all of my best friends (im besties with everyone in my school ahahahhaha....)
hopefully i didnt take up too much of ur time and that the reqs dont close after i just typed this😔😔 TYSM HWIAH THANKYU BE MY FRIEND PO IM COOL I SWEAR‼️🤞
Lol oh my- waking up to this was a great surprise, you seem very cool so I hope I see you around ‼️‼️
Anyways, I match you up with...
Rook Hunt!
Through your request, I was getting the vibe that you were hoping for someone who was introverted but I feel like an extrovert would be much better to match you up with! Rook at first would totally fall for your mask of being a loner and ngl like wet cat energy. I'm not sure about you but I'm 100% sure that Rook has talked to everyone on the NRC campus at least once. So, it was to his surprise how you seemed to be didn't match how you acted at all!
Also regarding weird name names he'll give you one back in return! Besides Floyd he wouldn't expect anyone to give him a weird nickname so when you gave him a nickname he gave you the nickname Madame/Monsieur Renard(e) which means fox in french!
Also, be prepared for him to break out the french and compliment you in french. "Je t'adore" "Tu regarde magnifique aujourd'hui" Although they seem such general pharses he means everything he says.
If you didn't know this man's family is r i c h- He has villa's in every kingdom of Twisted Wonderland, I doubt he's as rich as Kalim, Idia or Vil but he still probably has a pretty penny or two to spend. Anything within reason he'd buy for you!
Videogames? Rook would probably try to play a couple just for you but as he would say it "How about we switch it up and go to chasse (hunt)"
Overall, Rook matches your energy. Plus he'd do anything to make you happy. He's always one step ahead of you and is always ready to help you, all you have to give him is your love and he'll reciprocate it tenfold.
Runner-Up
Idia Shroud
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LMAOO dw it’s just part of your character development that’s honestly really funny (the way that you always find crazy people around you is also kinda crazy LMAO not even kidding you really did get the “it’s for the plot/character development” treatment
So real it’s definitely not ALL animanga but you can tell there’s some that just let the art or style carry actually I think you bring up a really good test though!! Like if you can co very it into a light novel and have it still be good then you know there’s at least some substance beyond just the visual effects…omg the jjk discourse about the female cast fr irks me like guys even maki is NOT developed enough like she fr is always just alluded to as tojis copy so??? Bro angel/hana’s treatment was actually foul I’m ngl I barely even remembered her until I saw her in the second to last chapter and immediately face palmed like bro why…..but yeah jjk is definitely not AWFUL awful but not as peak as everyone screams about
Oh definitely orv cast is developed and actually relevant also yess i love the platonic relationships and dynamics!!! Kdj and hsy are so funny LMAO I love seeing that kinda found family/platonic connection with kdj and co.
LMAOO so real like there’s chronically online but then there’s an even more extreme where it’s really “do you ever see the sun” but speaking of that post you reblogged made me giggle “are you pro or anti ship” “I have a life” LMAOOOOOOOO so real like it’s really not that deep guys
DDHSHS people on wattpad fr cannot handle reader not being the Mary Sue ultimate it girl with a reverse harem also to the people saying it’s perfect except the OCs bro it wouldn’t be the same without the ocs like let’s be real please and yeah like ESPECIALLY since it’s not even a commission of any sorts maybe you were just posting for the sake of being able to read it all through wp formatting and platform too, why people have the audacity to actually spew shit like that is beyond me like ok it’s not your story though??? And you really took the effort of writing out a comment to say this it’s much faster to just click the close tab button?? It’s like they comment thinking that you’ll go back and edit out all instances of your ocs??? Honestly disappearing off wp is such a mood
LMAO yeah I’ll definitely casually watch the anime because at least the animation usually has some cool scenes too but nothing all too serious after knowing what happens (actually I’m excited for the memes to come when the Yuta and cockroach curse get animated HAHA)
SHSGSHSHS it’s ok if you end up converting there’s a good chance that at some point I’d follow suit knowing us but the opposite sides of a war trope is actually so interesting I haven’t read anything with that in awhile?? Just generally not even on tumblr so many possibilities for adding in complexities and depth…wc Kunigami esp with the angst and the whole transformation of wc
REAL when kaneshiro fails yk Mira’s got you….still baffles me how yukis been sidelined (literally) sm WAIT AHAHAHAH im crying if it were otoya instead of yuki fwtkac i can imagine it where instead of reading looking at yukis account during that lunch scene she’s looking at otoyas profile and karasus like “bruh his hair looks like a fucking leek you like this one???” And then he enters the room where they play tag and he’s like “HOLY SHIT ITS THE LEEK DUDE YOU MF” while otoyas trying to think which of the fifty dates he went on karasus referring to
Ok good LMAO ik sometimes when people type on a keyboard they’re wrists get tired which is why the buy wristpads so jic that was you I didn’t wanna be making you type a whole essay response like normal LOL WAIT GAHAHAH the recent one where sae goes “this goal is still lukewarm” and literally has the whole genie looking trail this is too good
LMAO I’m gonna be honest most of the media I consume usually isn’t for the romance factor anyways like I usually watch kdramas after seeing like a cliffhanger betrayal/dramatic moment so I don’t even mind that it’s not super romantic LOL I agree having some crack shenanigans content is good it balances out the angst and romance
LMAOOOO noted I will take this calibration into account in the future o7 but YEAHHHH PURSUIT very hype
- Karasu anon
PLEASEEE i have made so many opps in my life and honestly i know there’s a saying that if you make enemies out of a lot of people you’re the problem but i really don’t think i am?? like i always try to self reflect and i definitely have been villainous in the past as has everyone but there’s a startling amount of people that dislike me for dumb reasons JHSFSD omg it’s so bad
whenever i think of dropping someone i’m like oh was i the bad person in this situation but being objective i hardly am 😭 this girl i think was just really jealous of me and so took the opportunity to put me down at any opportunity (she was also lowkey islamophobic and as almost half of my family is muslim i did not find her jokes terribly funny) and she was also one of the ones that like if i liked a guy she was suddenly OBSESSED with him meanwhile they wouldn’t even know who she was?? like she’d go up and talk to whatever guy i idly said was cute and they’d literally be like “who are you lol” 😰 there’s a lot of weird stuff w her she’s also HUGE into jjk and jjk x readers so i’ve always been terrified she’ll find my account hence why i don’t ever do face reveals or post pictures of things she might recognize (like my dogs…we had already stopped being friends by the time i started riding cloudie so i’m not scared of posting him) she only ever read on ao3 and didn’t try to figure out tumblr + she liked gojo choso and nanami none of whom i’ve written for so i probably would be safe but it’s still a thought in the back of my mind…anyways…
RIGHT like can you make a light novel out of this?? then it’s probably good…i think blue lock is a good counterexample actually where the story is very much so enhanced by the visuals because it’s a sport animanga but i think the sports genre is a little exempt from that test because who wants to read about sports KFHSD idk if that makes sense ANYWAYS everyone always says that jjk’s female cast is good as if not sexualized automatically equals well written…like yes gege did more for them in the sense that they were at least mostly covered up but that’s about where he began and ended 😭 BRO HANA GET BEHIND ME the way everyone hates her too i honestly just wish she got better treatment back when i was into jjk i LOVED her i honestly could write an entire essay about how i would’ve preferred she be written (like i did w kuni and yuki) but tbh the story started going downhill shortly after her introduction so idek where i’d start…suffice to say i would’ve had her be alluded to much earlier, not had her be obsessed with megumi (i think a romance between them could’ve been thematically and visually very lovely but NOT how it was handled and not given the fanbase jjk has), and expanded on the angel vs sukuna beef especially how that might’ve impacted the hana and yuji dynamic 😩 i think gege had the same problem as kaneshiro where there’s just too many characters but unlike bllk, there’s a much more expansive world in jjk too and that would’ve allowed for in depth exploration of more characters without slowing the story terribly if only that was a consideration yk
i don’t think jjk is horrible either!! there are a lot of things i enjoyed about it and i wouldn’t say it’s the worst thing to come out ever — it also suffers from having such a large fanbase that people are going to be disappointed no matter what direction gege goes in, so i have to give him that; however, agree, it’s not as peak as everyone says it is, and i think it’s fanbase would do well to recognize it for what it is (a normal shounen with slightly more gore but also with the regular pitfalls of the genre) sometimes i think the ending wouldn’t have been as disappointing if it hadn’t been hyped into smth beyond what it actually is yk 🤔 and honestly i don’t think it’s a failure of jjk to be that LMAO blue lock is very much so in that category and i still love that!! mostly because it is self aware and doesn’t try to do more than it has the capability for…instead it takes genre conventions and works inside them/expands on them (ego vs teamwork, the backstories of characters like snuffy) to maximize its impact?? idk if that makes sense HAHA like at the end of the day kaneshiro included anri’s hip waist bust measurements in the egoist bible and she’s also the only somewhat main female character so he’s not trying to beat the bad female cast allegations whatsoever he fr just threw chigiri in and called it a day but it works?? because he didn’t sit and say “hm how can we defy everyone’s expectations and astound the world” he was just like “ok soccer manga time”
I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE ARE SO PRESSED ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE’S SHIPS like i literally do NOT care i ship zero characters it absolutely does not matter to me…only ships that are important are nagimira, miraeita, and tabimira otherwise idgaf /j fr though like how hard is it to just scroll and ignore when you don’t like smth 😰 also the entire school of thought (mostly from 15> year olds) that you should just stop engaging in fandom or liking characters or whatever after the ripe elderly age of 20 is SO FUNNY but also insane like who do you think is writing the fics you enjoy?? i have many thoughts on it that would get me cancelled but to me the line is like “okay if the mangaka/anime studio drew the exact same character and said they were 20 would i believe them?? if so it’s whatever if not that’s a little weird” for example when i was a kid watching indigo league i liked gary oak LMAOOO but now i wouldn’t like him because he very obviously looks like a kid yk?? but there is functionally no difference in the way that megumi, inumaki, and ino from jjk are drawn despite them all being wildly different ages it’s truly just arbitrary and in my experience a lot of shounen is just adults writing stories about other adults and then making them be “in high school” to appeal to their target audience and make their characters be more relatable to high school boys aka the main readers 😭 anyways at the end of the day people like to police stuff like that a lot so i don’t really share my thoughts on it but it really is just live and let live i promise you whatever character you’re defending does NOT care that people are writing fics about them they are literally just lines on a page…
PEOPLE ON WATTPAD ARE INSANEEEE bro (related to the earlier point) it’s the same people that complain about adults liking characters that start spamming the most insanely foul sexual things at the age of thirteen like how do you even know what any of those words mean?? forget about saving yuta okkotsu from anne at accounting who likes to read fics about him after work SAVE HIM FROM THE TWEEN FANGIRLS THAT WOULD GET HIS ASS ARRESTED ‼️ since we’re applying irl morals to fiction and all it very much so is illegal the other way too 😭 anyways yeah they always have smth to complain about like if y/n isn’t a reverse harem lead with every single guy at her feet, every power in the world, cringy “cold” personality where she’s uber strong and tells people to commit, and isn’t lame asf they go insane?? people complain in the early chapters of pomegranate ink that it’s “embarrassing” how reliant the reader is on noritoshi and how she’s always sucking up to him…like hmm…let’s apply some critical thinking here…why would she (who’s been told her entire life that she’s good for nothing but bearing heirs, has been essentially locked in her room for her whole childhood, is considered “worthless��� because she didn’t inherit her family’s powers, and was almost married off to NAOYA ZENIN) be grateful to the one man who allowed her to have her own agency and treated her like an equal??? why would she be unsure in herself?? why would she ask for help constantly and think she’s weak??? also when they complain about her being weak omg please this story is 200k words i’m sorry she doesn’t start off strong but that would literally be so boringgggg it’s all about the slow development!! by the end of the story she’s brought someone back to life, is a grade sorcerer, defeats a special grade curse (because lbr she could’ve gone all of the way and killed jogo if it weren’t for plot needing him to be around longer), takes control of her ENTIRE CLAN, talks shit to sukuna’s face and then is instrumental in his defeat COME ONNNN SHE’S NOT WEAK FOREVER GIVE HER TIME she’s been abused for years it’ll take her a sec!! and speaking of abuse don’t get me started on the way they talk about reader’s mother LFKJHSDLKFJ they fr act like she’s the true villain when she’s in no better of a situation than reader 😭 actually things are worse for her because she has no one but her daughter left and her relationship with reader only just starts healing in pomegranate…god forbid we have complex female characters though!!
HELP if i convert to itoshism i’m dragging you down with me i can’t do it alone!! and i think opposite sides of a war necessitates writing a conflict that isn’t black and white (or else one of the characters would be evil and that’s usually looked down upon) hence why most authors steer clear as that can be difficult to do without making any one side into a villain HAHAHA maybe one day i’ll tackle the challenge again!! believe it or not i have done so previously in ship in the harbor and ig i did it well enough people seemed to like it…who knows LMAO
PLEASE THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING like fwtkac reader posts a picture of herself and otoya on a date and karasu swipes up on the story with an entire paragraph about how her new boyfriend is ugly horrendous hideous nasty fresh out of the swamp and whatever other insults fwtkac bestie came up with meanwhile reader is just like ?? your hair can be measured with a protractor ?? LSKFHSDKFJH omg there would fr be no tabieita it would be tabiken and then otoya would just be there because karasu will never forgive the “shrek lookalike” that almost stole his girl…wait that reminds me that according to hiori fwtkac reader is the only girl karasu follows on social media??? idk but that’s making me laugh rn because i think i wrote that he’s friends with all of reader’s friend group but he’s just so loyal to this girl who absolutely despises him that he won’t follow any other females but her 😭 honestly for all of her academic genius looking back fwtkac reader is so dumb because how did she not read between the lines there…
HAHA DW i’m all good!! i’ve recently begun responding to your asks on my ipad instead of my iphone which is why my responses have gotten exponentially longer and less emoji riddled LMAOO so it’s been chill!! responding on my ipad also means no random glitching out since i’m doing it on the website which auto saves drafts iirc so double win fr
LMAOO if you do end up watching it lmk how it goes!! and yeahhh if i’m ever going to go on a long hiatus i’ll make it explicitly clear like you will be able to tell without question that i’m gone otherwise it’s probably just me being silly HAHAH anyways this ended up being a bunch of random unrelated rants i’m sorry 😭
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The road is a depressing book about why we live life and is poorly executed. if one may deal with thoughts of suicide, may wanna skip this post. oh and canabilism. lots of it
my goal is discussion so have literally the slightest thought cross your mind please tell me about it. i will steal it for my essay (i will credit if asked to)
the books ending is shit. not in the 'oOOO oo emotions' way but bad writing way. the man dies to illness and the boy is on his lonesome for like two days until a deus de machina comes and gives the boy a chance at a new life. and the overall message is like supposed to be life moves on even if you dont(?) or maybe that our lives maybe shit but we have the ability to help it so we must live. ignoring that they really do fuck all to make their lives feel like they are worth living. idk man it feels stupid trying to analyze the plot when the setting is the main focus. like the reason mcarthy wrote the book wasnt to tell a story about characters but to show a desolate post apocalyptic america. i am supposed to question the idea of 'good vs evil' and its dichotomy.
my first thing to say is there are no good guys. not like the boy and the man evil but neutral. grandpa too. just living to survive with no greater purpose. simply walking an uncertain road to oblivion. okay ill mention the on the nose theme of the road is life and youll meet all types of people but they all leave at some point and leave an impact on you in some way. the depiction of the road as cabalistic also an on the nose dog eats dog world.
(great point of idea over execution. dog eats dog world -> man eats man-> man eats man!! fr!! thats a fun little detail but that leaves us with no real reason for canabilism. like i think they mention crows at some point? not the best option but better than newborn.
'oh theres no plants' okay fuckwad why do they have trees? and apples? our duo find a doomsday bunker intact which proves that there is still places unscavenged not saying it would be easy just there are ways to live without eating human flesh. actually htf does the settlement at the end of the book survive? they have to eat something. thats a big detail i dont think carthy would miss that im probably forgetting.
just canabilism aspect doesnt sit right with me. would it be too twitter of me to say this book realizes on a white suburban view of life? cause like native americans didnt live here for fucking centuries as stewards of the land and with mellow cultures for you to say that all society would collapse. like yes the upper middle class up live cushy lives and probably never have killed an animal bc of thier own need of food but others in poverty already live in some [i am white upper class and have no balls to say all] of these conditions. is the road an analogy of poverty? like it would be the end of the higher class but not all of us
actually i really like that point. this is only a horror/sad story for those of us fortunate enough not to live it. we are cooing at the preventable corspe of our fellow man with the smoking gun still in our hands.)
okay idea three(?) would be idea one remixed. the man is the stand in for the older generation or for my purpose the 'current' generation. boy likewise is the to-be inheriters of the current generation title. The man is cautious of people and holds no sympathy for 'others' but he still willing to go into the old world wreckage to scavenge. the boy is opposite, empath but terrified of the world that came before him. good and evil would have to rely on the characters morals. and the focus shifts from the man to the boy when he inherits the current generation title. could be the theme of 'the world is seen through the procived majorities eyes.'
i think i deleted the part that says 'keep living by obligation' which mcarthy fails to make this interesting. like the plot being because dad says so isnt inspiring. okay a realistic life is lived by obligation but thats not a good story motivator. i did what i always do which is watch a video essay about the topic bc im cool like that and he said that the point is to ask the question 'is there a reason for anything?' which yeah interesting question hard to execute in a meaningful or memorable way. or if there is it definitely isnt the road. im a hudge bitch when it comes to stories that make my class have discussions on whether suicide is the answer and seemed to genuinely go to yes. that was the moment i felt most kindled by the duo bc my god mcarthy you better prove them wrong or ill cry. not bc of you unique writing style but because these fucks deserve better. i deserve better.
the man and boy should share more moments being genuine with eachother. no one ever breaks down and like expresses shit to work through it they just crack for a second then go back to surviving cause boys dont cry. like its obvious that the man loves his son. but does he love the person? does he love the boy beyond the title of kin. same thing in the other direction too. cause i really dont think these characters do. and that could be interesting if you explored that but thats not mcarthys goal!! so they are just bland tear fodder. like i think the goal was 'the road is worth walking with loved ones' they lack any attributes so the reader can imprint whatever ideology onto them. Thats lazy. These arent people. Fucking Sun Wukong, representation of the human mind, one of the most varried things in existence, has enough character that the duo would turn to ash in his presence while being a damn fine metaphor (even if it doesn't encompass everyone)
im expected to give them pidy on the idea that they are human and trying to survive in a world hell bent on killing them and just like. yeah man that sucks but me too. and then we both continue living our shitty depressing lives and never do jack shit to help ourselves. well i guess the entire book is to get to a better place. but what happens when they get there that couldnt happen in rock city? what changes because of this. i know i know the winter. i feel unsatisfied. okay so thier goal is to keep living in the world where they reside. not im going to stop this. which is boring i can go talk to any bitch out on the street and get the same life story eachtime. i dont care anymore.
I get thats not the point. that not everything must be a call to action. that this is a fiction book desperate trying to presist thats its real. not like those other books but this is my tumblr blog so im going to say i hate that. i hate the idea that this is it. theres no hope here. go outside and weep if your looking for that. dont require me to read in class a story where nothing is accomplished. where the main take away is our lives will not impact the universe and therefore are meaningless.
okay tldr: the roads all like 'life is meaningless monotonous mess' and i think thats a really boring topic. with out agency your novel is shit. i dont really care about these characters at all bc they arent characters. they are muses for the reader to view how they like. which did not work in this book.
#the road by cormac mcarthy#discussion#spoilers#essay but yknow written on my phone in an hour and published to tumblr#suicide mention#ramble#irl#english class shit#canabilism#i used the word empath ironically. thats not a real thing#book review#i wish i could turn this in for a grade#infanticide
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FR LIKE OH MY GOD
ii3’s claim that Balloon was just as bad as Knife or Nickel just makes the story worse. Full stop. The most interesting arcs (in my opinion) in S2 stem from Balloon’s relationships with other characters, and the way S2 establishes these relationships is important: everyone distrusts Balloon and thinks he’s an ass, but his tomfoolery didn’t seriously hurt anyone. The other contestants (aside from Suitcase) treat Balloon as an inconvenience at best and rival at worst. He’s a loser and a punching bag character.
At the beginning of S2, Balloon has barely anything to repent for. A lot of the characters’ hatred of him comes off as annoyance rather than any deep feelings of betrayal. Balloon’s behavior put a bad taste in everyone’s mouth, but that’s about it. Furthermore, Balloon’s nasty behavior being just an act (by his own admission) puts him on a completely different playing field from characters like Knife and Nickel. Knife’s character arc throughout S2 is about self-improvement and trying to “play the game right.” He makes an active effort to be careful, respectful, and blunt. He tries to unlearn old behaviors and adopt new ones. Nickel’s character arc in S2 is being a self-destructive bully (which I’ll get into later) and his arc in S3 is being the bane of my existence. Balloon on the other hand doesn’t need to learn how to treat others better. He doesn’t need to challenge any previous ideas he held because he’s already come to the conclusion that what he did was wrong. The only thing he needs to do is muster up the bravery to apologize and the self-worth to make new friends. Balloon has improving to do, but it’s far less than Knife and Nickel.
I find the Grand Slams fiasco so engaging because Nickel OVERREACTED to Ballon’s presence. Balloon was not a threat. He was a mild inconvenience at worst. Nickel’s decision to go above and beyond, to try and get rid of Balloon at every turn, to berate him and set him up for failure was what made Nickel interesting to me. Nickel was not a rational actor trying to distance himself from a toxic peer, nor was he a victim imperfectly defending himself. He was an overprotective, insecure bully who let his jealously cloud his judgement and prevent him from fostering the friendships he so desperately wanted to protect. I loved Nickel because he was fault for his downfall.
None of Nickel’s behavior toward Balloon in S2 was justified. When S3 claims that Ballon was just as bad as Nickel and used similar tactics, it’s retroactively making S2 worse by 1.) just being inconsistent and 2.) implying that Nickel was justified in his fear and defensiveness, or at the very least that he wasn’t overreacting.
Look. I like to write needlessly long essays about the impacts decisions have on a text, but I think the previous user said it best. Balloon just wasn’t that bad.
I wanna talk about how this transition from “Balloon was kind of a jerk” to “Balloon was a manipulator just like Nickel” happened, and I have a few theories, but tbh I’m tired and don’t want to pretentiously ramble any longer.
TLDR; ii3’s writing makes me want to chew through drywall. /neg
Literally all Balloon did in s1 was insult their teammates, slingshot Sslt into the gorge (which was THE CHALLENGE, and Pickle tripped over Rocky and let go too early so that wasn’t even their fault tbh), and made an alliance with the INTENT to manipulate (but never did on screen). Yet the entire ii cast acts like he poisoned their crops, killed their mother, and kicked their dog
#inanimate insanity s2#inanimate insanity invitational#inanimate insanity#ii3#ii ballon#ii nickel#rant#as you can see I am very normal about object show characters
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Say in your bio that your requests were open🫣 …so don’t mind if I do request something.
First off, before the actual request I wanted to say that I appreciate all the work you’ve made and will do in the future. Second, the way you write things and the talent you behold just amazes me every single time I read something of yours. Third, I would write this myself but I love your writing too much to not request it here😭 I’m fr weak for your fics. Fourth and final, I hope you’re doing well and everyone else reading this🫶
I just got this idea in my head, now it’s not something massive just cute as hell but a little angsty and pretty short if I do say it myself.
So to the request,
What I was thinking is that Daryl who in this case don’t think of himself as anything special or anything to have. He also believes that he’s a complete asshole. So when the reader (fem!reader preferably but if you wanna do gender neutral!reader that’s completely fine with me!!) anyways, when the reader catches feelings for Daryl and begins to show it, he pretends like he doesn’t notice because he’s afraid that he will just end up hurting the reader. Therefore the reader doesn’t give up the hope for him and them to be together, but they’re too shy to actually make a bold move. Daryl is in fact interested in them but won’t admit it. So when it has passed a couple of years and nothing has happened between them (thinking like pre-negan Alexandria era) the reader makes a bold move. Like they try to kiss him or something, he accepts it. Yet he cuts it off and walks away after telling the reader that he likes them too but can’t be with them. He proceeds to ignore them for a couple of weeks until one day they find him and confront him since they didn’t have a shot to before he ran off. When they talk it out he reveals that the reason he can’t be with them is because he thinks so lowly of himself and is afraid he’ll hurt them. Then they tell him it’s okay and they start to kiss then the rest you decide yourself…
I literally wrote up there “it’s nothing massive” and “it’s pretty short” then I proceeded to write a full on essay🥲
Hiii!!
Wow I never expected that you liked my work, I read your stories and I loved them, it's a honor to me to do this request, your words mean a lot to me, I'm really happy and I hope you'll enjoy the story.
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Not Good Enough
Daryl Dixon x Reader.
Requested by: @rickgrimeswifey
Warnings: Fluff. Confessions. Daryl POV.
Words: 4800
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(N/A: the look of the gif is important for the story, sorry I needed to do that)
***
Daryl can't stop looking at you, it's not the first time, and he's sure it won't be the last, he can't help it. You're talking to Michonne and Tara as you play with Judith, sitting on the porch in the house that is now yours in Alexandria, some want to find their own place, you've been stabilized there for a while, Maggie and Glenn are having a baby and have found their own home, though not too far away, always close to Rick and the others.
Daryl would like to have that too, with you, but he's not blind, he knows he never will. how could he? Ever since you came to Alexandria you've joked, you've played around telling everyone you're boyfriend and girlfriend, but it's not true, you've never had that kind of relationship. How could you want anything with him? What good is he? Nothing, he's just a sniffer dog, a hunter, a squirrel eating redneck with a lousy sense of humor who doesn't know how to socialize with anyone. Yet Daryl would love to be able to play along with your game and joke and fool around in front of the rest like you do. But he gets blocked every time you touch him or look at him.
It wasn't an immediate thing, he knows that. You met at the Greene's farm, Maggie's friend, you were there because your family fell ill and were in the barn with the other Walkers, though at first Daryl and the others didn't know that, of course. You were studying the medical books Hershel had, which you had taken from the town library when it all went down. Daryl saw you as a lost girl, innocent and locked in your world, the security the farm gave you with the family put you in a bubble, but you had strength, you didn't hesitate to help Carl, you didn't hesitate to help him when he appeared as a rag, when Andrea shot him.
He started to see changes in you and himself when the farm fell, you cried for all you had lost and left behind, but soon you became one of the group, you didn't mind standing guard at night, you took care of Carl when Lori was exhausted from pregnancy, you tried to cheer up Beth and Maggie, you kept studying with Hershel. Daryl started to feel something after a few weeks of travel, when he discovered you trying to learn how to fight, you had a hunting knife and a rudimentary bow that almost made the hunter laugh, but you were trying, he wanted to teach you and from that day a beautiful friendship was born between you.
Not only that, Daryl knows now and he knew soon after, in prison, how fucked up he was when he looked at you and felt his skin crawl, how his stomach would shrink when other men approached you. Jealousy. Daryl had never experienced that kind of jealousy before and he felt stupid. He had no right to feel jealous, not because you were nothing more than good friends. You had every right to look for someone better, someone who truly deserved you.
"Why don't you tell her how you feel about her?" insisted Carol a couple of times, Daryl growled like a wounded animal.
"Ain't gotta feelings for her. She's just a friend."
"Of course..." She snorted in amusement leaving him alone with his thoughts.
Then the prison fell and for a moment he thought he had lost you, chaos, gunshots, Hershel's death, zombies invading the prison, everything on fire, the group dispersed completely, he was left alone, running into a group of drones before falling into Terminus with several other comrades, Daryl was relieved to see them, but at the same time the panic was greater.
Then Carol blew it all up and you were with her. He hugged Carol with all his might and with you he did exactly the same, he pressed you against his chest feeling his arms shaking around your body.
"Easy Dixon, you're not getting away from me that easy." You joked and Daryl wished he could tell you he didn't plan to, but he bit his tongue in time.
Now in Alexandria everything is much more relaxed, everything seems to fit, the group has adapted quickly, there have been some altercations that they have had to solve, they have shown that they are of use, that these people need to know how to defend themselves for whatever has to come, because peace, unfortunately, does not last forever, but it is a good place, Daryl knows that, when Deanna asked him that first day if he wanted to be there, he said yes, that the children deserved a safe place, he never thought of himself, he was just passing through, if his people decided to stay and he was not comfortable, he was willing to leave, not to be a burden. But he was never able to truly walk away.
And there he is now, trying to fix a bike Aaron found some time ago, he told him if he could rebuild it he could go out with him to explore, to find more people who needed shelter, Daryl was fine with that, getting out of there even if it was just for a few hours took his mind off the thinking and the burden.
"Congratulations Mr. Explorer." You had joked when he told the rest of the group. "I hope you'll give me a ride one day." You smiled winking at him and he felt himself blush.
"Oh come on, you're his girlfriend, I'm sure he gives you more than that." Rosita joked and you laughed hysterically, but Daryl had to pull away feeling like his face was going to explode.
He's concentrating on repositioning some parts that from rattling along the forest roads have come a little loose when he hears a male voice near where you are. Trying to disguise his anxiety he raises his head to discover Spencer talking to you, he has completely ignored Michonne and Tara who look at the man between amused and curious, the eldest Monroe son has leaned over the stairs and caresses Judith's hands as he talks to you. You smile politely and respond, but Daryl can read what he can't see; your body tense, leaning back slightly, your eyes shifting nervously, your lips forced into that smile. You're uncomfortable.
He gets up from the ground wiping the grease off his fingers with the red scraf he always carries with him, puts it in his back pocket and walks straight towards you, he's left the crossbow next to the bike, he doesn't know what he might hear when he gets there and he doesn't want to put an arrow in Spencer's head 'by accident.' When he reaches the porch he sees your eyes looking at him and your body instantly relaxes, your gaze soften and your smile becomes sincere. Daryl's heart hits his chest hard and he feels his cheeks burn, but he tries to appear normal.
"What's wrong Monroe?" he wants to sound calm and relaxed, but his words come out as a bark startling the younger man.
"Dixon..." He greets him reluctantly and breaks away from you to look at him. Your body relaxes a little more and you use Judith's hand to greet him, Daryl feels his mouth curve into a small smile, but he turns his attention back to Spencer when he moves. "Nothing, I was just talking to the girls."
"My mom's having a party, it's been two years since you guys got here and she wants to celebrate that everything is still peaceful." He says matter-of-factly. "I guess you're not interested, it wouldn't be the first time you didn't show up..."
"Sure... What about, is everything okay?" he shrugs and Spencer mimics his gesture.
Daryl bites his lip several times, trying to control what he wants to say, he knows it's not the time or the place, Spencer is just a kid in his eyes, he's just teasing him to set him off, but Daryl has learned to have some self control, he's not as volatile as he used to be. Or at least he tries to be. Then he sees you get up leaving Judith with Michonne and walk towards him. He holds his breath as your arms wrap around his arm and you press yourself against him. Again that game pretending to be his girlfriend.
"Of course he's coming, we were all adjusting that night, but this party we're not going to miss, are we?" You look at him with bright expectant eyes, he knows you're really proposing, he knows if he says no Spencer will take the opportunity to invite him himself. He grunts low and shakes his head.
"Sure, we'll go." He huff nodding again.
"Okay, great, the more the merrier." There's a hint of annoyance in his voice and it makes Daryl's chest swell and at the same time his alarms go off even more.
He knew Spencer had an interest in you, but he never thought it was that much, in everyone's eyes you're a couple and yet he's still trying to hit on you, he's certainly not to be trusted. Daryl has to be careful with him. Before he's aware you are left alone on the porch, Spencer is gone and Michonne and Tara laugh as you let go of the hunter's arm.
"You can't refuse now." Your voice brings Daryl back to Earth. "You're coming with me to the party." You insist and Daryl mentally curses.
"It's okay, I dunno know why you guys insist on those stupid parties, it ain't the world it used to be."
"That's exactly why, a little 'normalcy' never hurt anyone. I'll be at Rick and Michonne's." You inform him. "And shower!" you order him, Daryl rolls his eyes in disgust as he walks away hearing your friends' laughter.
***
Hot water running over his entire body, hair plastered to his face, dirt being washed down the torrent getting lost in the shower drain, Daryl has his hands resting on the wall of the small room and his head sunk between his arms. He really doesn't believe he's doing this. He really can't believe he's nervous about this. He could have talked to you, he could have told you to forget it, that he wasn't going to that party with you, but something inside him stopped him from doing it. He was curious, not about the party, but about seeing you, you had said you were going to be at Rick and Michonne's house which meant you were going to get ready for the event and Daryl wants to see you. He's never been a detail man, he's never stopped to look at how a woman dresses, before or after the zombie apocalypse, but he has to admit that if you're going to wear a dress, he's eager to see how it looks on you.
He turns off the shower tap at last, brushes several strands of hair away from his face and steps out, rubbing his body against the towel. His reflection looks back at him in the mirror and he stands there staring at himself for a few moments. The dripping hair, long and matted, the unkempt beard from several weeks of routing with Aaron, his body, his skin, always full of wounds, scars covering his chest, his shoulders, not to mention his father's gift on his back, no, he certainly wasn't the kind of man you deserved to see or touch. He chews his lip several times before wrapping his towel around his waist and exits the bathroom. His steps are hesitant until he reaches Carol's room where he very slowly knocks on the door. After a few seconds in silence the door opens and Carol looks at him in surprise.
"Daryl, is something wrong?"
"I need yer help." He confesses and the woman looks him up and down before nodding her head.
**
He clenches his hands nervously by the door of the Grimes' house. His heart is about to pound out of his chest and he's almost startled when he rings the doorbell and it rings louder than he expects. He's never felt nauseous before, not from nerves, maybe after a bad hangover, but this is different. It's like he's a virgin boy going after the most popular girl in high school to go to the prom, when has he ever been fifteen again? There's still time, he could turn around and run away, but it wouldn't do much good, Alexandria is fenced in by high walls and even if he took the bike and escaped, he knows you'd find him. The door then opens and Daryl loses all sense of speech.
"Wow Dixon, you look amazing." You say with a wide, sincere smile.
Yes, Carol maybe have done wonders with him, she had done his hair and cut it a bit, even shaved and fixed his goatee giving him a more handsome touch, or so she had said, they had found a black shirt and jeans that he fit into well, without being too baggy or too tight, the only thing Carol had allowed him to wear with him was his vest and even that had cleaned it up a bit.
But you look beautiful.
You've pulled your hair up in a nice headdress, with a few loose strands, falling wildly down your face, you've let them paint your eyes and lips a little, though you're clearly not comfortable in it, but the dress, Daryl looks you up and down several times, is a nice dress that fits the shape of your chest with a black belt to then fall free to your knees, it has a suggestive neckline, without being obscene, and Daryl would swear your legs are longer thanks to the high heels you're wearing. He smiles and clears his throat trying to get the words back in his mouth.
"Ya look good." It's the only thing she's able to say coherently. A snicker escapes your nose and you nod.
"Thanks, so... shall we go?"
Daryl shakes his head and walks down the porch steps waiting for you to follow him, however, you don't move from the door, he turns back to look at you and you wave your hands for him to come back with you.
"I'm sorry, but I'm unable to walk in these, I need help."
"Then why did ya put them on?" he comes back to your side and you hold tightly to his arm, so you walk to the Monroe's house.
"Never mind, Daryl, just help me." You laugh and he knows he's missing something, but he doesn't insist either.
At the party no one takes their eyes off you, Rosita and Abraham comment several times that you look spectacular, that dress looks amazing on you and you are only able to smile and blush, there are also words for Daryl, loaded with jokes and trying to tease him because he finally knows what a shower and a comb is, but he ignores them, even Deanna seems surprised when she approaches to greet you two.
"Wow, Rick surprised me back in the day, but he's certainly not the only one." She says looking at him and you laugh, Daryl tenses when your fingers brush his cheek leaving a warm trace on his skin.
"My man has always been very handsome, but he's a little shy." You joke and Deanna laughs with a nod.
"Of course, enjoy the party." She encourages you and walks away to continue talking to the rest of the guests.
Daryl can't deny that parties are still not his thing, too many people, too much noise, engrossed laughter, repetitive music, constant greetings and conversations that lead nowhere, he has stayed on one side of the room, with the first drink he's been given and hasn't tasted yet, observing everything, every inhabitant of the community, every movement, conversation, laughter, everything he studies intently while not losing detail of where you are, it's hard not to, every time your dress dances, his eyes are riveted on your figure and he feels like a pervert because he would love to get lost under your skirt.
"Daryl!" he freaks out when your face appears in front of him closer than he thought you were, he tries to back away, but the wall cuts off his escape. "Let's dance."
"What?"
"Dance, it's a party! at parties you dance."
"No, ain't dance." He quickly denies. "I think I should go now."
"It's still early, besides, are you going to stand up your girlfriend? That would be ugly."
"I don't..." He bites his lip again. "We ain't boyfriend and girlfriend..." He whispers feeling those words burn in his throat.
"But they don't know that." You say laughing mischievously and grab his arm dragging him along with the rest of the crowd.
"W-Wait!" he tries to stop you, but it's too late.
Your hands wrap around his neck, your fingers crossing over the back of his neck, you cling to him to start moving to the soft rhythm of the music, the mood has completely changed and Daryl is feeling a little overwhelmed. Not knowing how to act he places his hands on your ribs and you laugh again.
"Lower them a little, Robocop, to my waist." You guide him.
He obeys, his hands sliding down your sides to rest on your waist, he breathes heavily, as if short of breath and feels warm, it's possible he's having a panic attack, he's never experienced one, but he's sure that's what it is. You smile again and as the two of you move slowly like the rest of the couples, you rest your head on his chest and close your eyes. Daryl is convinced you can hear his heart beating a mile a minute, his hands are shaking on your body and he's sweating like he's inside a sauna. His eyes then discover that Spencer isn't taking his eyes off you and his hands tighten on you out of pure instinct. You sigh without waiting for the grip and your fingers tangle in his hair.
"I like the way you've done your hair...your messy, disheveled style doesn't bother me either, but you look...cute"
"Thanks...I guess, that a woman call a man 'cute' ain't sure if is a good thing." He says in a breathy whisper, his eyes riveted on Spencer, challenging each other and you laugh. "I asked Carol for help..."
"Uhm right, I should have figured." You laugh again and your body vibrates with his. "I have to thank her." You say it sincerely, even though he doesn't appreciate it.
The party is behind you when you decide to leave, it's still early, but you feel that Daryl has hung in there long enough and delivered better than you expected, you really didn't even think he was going to show up and you'd go to the party alone, it was a pleasant surprise to discover him on the other side when you opened the door. You are elated, you haven't had much to drink, you know it's not because of that, you feel good, like you haven't for a long time, you are safe, you live in a great community, your people are adapting, you have a present and the future doesn't seem so bad. You have Daryl and you can't say for sure, but for the first time since you started testing the waters, you seem to be on the same page, Daryl doesn't reject your flirting, he still gets nervous, but he handles it better than before, you can even tell he seems jealous of Spencer to you. Maybe he's finally lowered his walls himself, he's showing himself to you freely.
"Daryl..." You call out to him and he stops.
You look at each other for a few seconds that seem to last an eternity. He doesn't know what to do, why you've stopped, what you really want. You take a few steps closer, rest a hand on his chest and luckily those heels are high enough, you just have to lift your head a little and kiss him. Very shallow, testing the waters, however when you want to pull away Daryl grabs you by the waist and kisses you back. An intense, almost fierce kiss, he holds you by the nape of your neck and his tongue bursts inside your mouth. You moan and Daryl's eyes widen. He pulls away from you as if you're on fire and takes a few steps back.
"What?" you gasp, your head spinning. "What's wrong?"
"No, this isn't right." He shakes his head, his fingers rubbing his lips. "No..."
"Daryl, hey, listen to me. I kissed you." You try to move closer, but he pulls back again.
"No, fuck no, no, not this..." He runs his hands over his face and growls. "Why did ya do that?"
"Why? I think it's clear, Daryl, I-I lo..." You start to say, but redden.
"No, don't say it. There are thousands of guys better than me here." He spits angrily. "Why me?"
"Why you? Oh for God's sake Daryl, you're better than them..."
"No! I'm no good at anything, I'm just a fucking redneck, I only know how to go out there, kill zombies and hunt squirrels. I don't..." He shuts up and looks at you, he can see the doubt and confusion on your face and it makes him feel even worse. "No, find someone else who really deserves ya. Because I'm not good for this, I'm not... I'm not what ya deserve." He growls finally and like a wounded puppy he turns and runs away from there.
You don't even have time to think, nor to defend yourself, nor to run after him, because when you try your heels prevent you from doing so, making you stumble. This was certainly not how you expected the night to end.
**
Daryl ignores you. No. Daryl runs away from you, every time you meet in any place or room, the archer turns around and disappears. He knows he's acting like a real asshole, but he's really just a scared little boy. That kiss haunts him every night, he dreams of what might have happened next, the feel of your body next to his is so real that every morning he wakes up covered in sweat and with a painful, as well as embarrassing, erection. He can't look you in the face, not when every time he does his dreams come back to his mind. Not after everything he said to you.
He regrets it because he knows he could have handled the situation differently, you could have talked and made things clear, but he panicked because you love him, his feelings are reciprocated and that terrifies him. It terrifies him because he doesn't want to tie you to him. It's not fair to you. He knows you'll find something better, even Spencer would be a better candidate than him.
He grunts and shakes his head at his own thoughts. No, maybe not him, but surely someone would come along who would.
"What have you done now?" Carol's voice pulls him out of his thoughts. He peers over the side of the bike and shrugs.
"Why did I have to do anything?"
"Because she's in a rage and I'm sure it's your fault."
"Who?"
"For God's sake, don't play this game, Daryl, you know perfectly well who I'm talking about." She replies angrily, crossing her arms. "So you tell me the easy way or I'll end up getting it out of you the hard way, your choice."
Daryl gives her a sidelong glance, he hates it when his friend uses that overbearing motherly tone, he's unable to deny her what she asks whenever she does, he nods and stops what he's doing, wiping his hands.
"What happened at the party?"
"...We kissed..." He whispers and Carol's eyes sparkle with excitement.
"Oh Daryl, what kinky thing did you propose to do?" he knows his friend's voice is laced with irony, but he doesn't feel like playing along.
"I told her she deserved better..." he confesses and Carol's smile falters.
"But Daryl, she..."
"Yes, I know, but no." He denies again. "And ain't need yer advice, or yer comfort, not this time, Carol. It's my decision."
"It's a stupid decision, you know that, don't you?" She's still angry, but she can't burden him within her nonchalant gesture she knows her friend is having a hard time.
That doesn't mean she's going to listen to him.
***
"Daryl." Carl shows up by the garage that afternoon, Daryl has returned from a patrol with Aaron after several days of scouting around.
"Hey kiddo, what's up?"
"Uhm I need your help, Dad and Michonne have left me in charge of Judith, but something's happened..." He lowers his head nervously and Daryl gets nervous.
The two rush home, Carl looking so agitated that the older man's distress grows by the minute. When they arrive at the Grimes' house, Carl stands in the doorway and points upstairs to where the baby's room is. Nothing is heard, no crying, no laughter, nothing, and that shrinks the archer's heart. Without waiting for the young man to follow him, he goes up the stairs two at a time. Everything is in darkness, in the distance, in a room with a half-open door, a small hand can be seen, someone lying on the floor.
Daryl enters the room like a hurricane, his heart hammering in his ears, his pulse racing and barely able to breathe. But there is no Judith. What's on the floor is a doll. He hears the street door close and the bedroom door close. When he turns around he discovers you there, leaning against the door, arms folded across your chest, scowling at him. His heart stops and the blood freezes in his veins.
Caught.
He shifts nervously, picks up the doll from the floor and looks at it in his hands, looks at you and points at the object.
"Twisted..."
"You asked for it, it's impossible to talk to you." You shrug, you know it was cruel, putting Judith in danger even if it's fictional.
Daryl puts the doll down on the bed and looks around, there's a window, the house isn't very high and there's the porch roof, he could jump through it and run away that way.
"Don't even try." You say reading his mind. "I've jammed the window so you can't open it, so you have no escape."
"How did ya come up with all this?"
"Carol gave me some ideas."
"Of course..." He growls clenching his fists. he's going to kill his best friend. "Listen to me..."
"No, you listen to me." You cut him off. "That night you walked out without letting me explain myself, you spouted all that shit and you didn't even hear my opinion, well, now you're going to hear it, whether you want to or not." You're still angry, hurt, anger makes your voice vibrate just like your body, you don't handle anger well, you're not an irascible person and it frustrates you when you find yourself like this.
"I'm sorry, I..."
"No! Fuck no, we kissed, I kissed you and you kissed me and suddenly everything went to shit." You snap and fidget nervously. "I love you, Daryl, a lot and for a long time, but I'm sure you knew that, but it was easier to pretend I didn't." You lick your lips and sigh. "I joked and fooled around trying to figure out where the line was, but you never stopped me, so I thought maybe it wasn't just me, that you were too..." You look sideways at him, but he has his eyes glued to the floor. "Then you got jealous with Spencer and my hopes went up..." You feel tears welling up in your eyes and you rub your eyes. You don't want to cry. "But you can't tell me you don't want to be with me because I don't deserve you..." Your voice sounds broken and Daryl lifts his head, he doesn't want to make you cry. "If you don't feel the same way, if I've misunderstood all this, I apologize and I'd like us to be friends again, like before, but you can't reject me just because you think I don't deserve you..."
"It's just that ya deserve better, ain't..."
"How can you say that? I don't know anyone better than you, Daryl. You say you're just a redneck, you're good for nothing and I say bullshit!" You burst out and Daryl looks at you with wide eyes. "I don't know anyone who deserves to be happy more than you." You whisper and wipe away a few tears that run down your face, Daryl slowly walks towards you. "I don't care that you're made for this world, because, after all, we've all adapted, but you're so much more than a soldier, than a redneck; you're a good man, and kind, you're faithful and loyal to your people, you're protective and loving, you take care of the children, you make sure no one lacks food, no one is cold or afraid at night. You are everything I want..." You confess and Daryl feels as if he himself could burst into tears at any moment. "So if you don't feel the same way I do, I'll understand and let you go, but if you really have feelings for me, I don't..." You can't finish the sentence.
Daryl holds your cheeks and kisses you intensely. You gasp for a second, but you're not going to let him pull away, you stand on your tiptoes and reciprocate his kiss. Daryl growls against your mouth and pushes your body against the door as his tongue tangles with yours, your whole body trembles, wrapped in too many feelings you don't know how to express, too long repressing yourself and finally being reciprocated.
"Yer everythin' I want too..." Daryl whispers when you break the kiss and you both smile.
***
The End.
≈≈≈≈
Again, thank you so much for the request idea I loved to write it! And thanks for trust in my writing for make this idea real. It was a honor to me. At first I wanted to make smut but I liked the romantic moment, I hope you don't mind.
I hope you liked it and it was what you expected!
See you in the next stories!!
#my stuff#norman reedus#normanreedus#daryl dixon#daryldixon#twd fanfiction#ask me#one shot#daryl x reader#resquest#fanfic request#fluff one shot#fluff stuff
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umm...... pay this no mind i’ve just typed this stuff out like.. more times than i can count in the dms of everyone that i make watch inft and im tired of doing it over and over so im just gonna.. so i can just link this.. well anyway.
tbh this is just like. shit that i noticed and/or like personally speaking but anyway
my essay on why rymin is actually that deep
just gonna paste this one in here first of all. but anyway.
EXHIBIT A. the era stat being min and ryan's colors. blue for min who is stuck in the past and red for ryan always trying to rush ahead. meeting in the middle being the right answer in the end v-v
EXHIBIT B. kez saying ""the colors are bold but the lines have hesitation" irt this painting. and whos palettes are in it? EXACTLY. need i say more? no.
AND EXHIBIT C!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! episode 1: them and their palettes are separated by the door in an incredibly noticeable way
BUT in the last episode their palettes finally join e/o while they play on stage
LIKE everyone already knows theyre red and blue gays (the blueprint honestly) but i just am so in love with the way its shown in like. more than what they wear and is used thematically to represent them at multiple points. coughing wheezing... even their jumpsuits despite both being grey have cool and warm undertones respectively.
Also just like the way in all these screenshots alone min is on the left and ryan on the right when we view chronological order in a left to right fashion this one is probably more coincidental but.. ugh... ------
And another thing. can we talk about ryan’s cassette please? i wanna talk about ryan’s cassette. in the maze when min says “isnt that kinda the same as my dads van?” ryans response is one that suggests hes surprised min knew the song by mentioning his first album. so this makes me think “my dads van” wasnt a song they wrote together. BUT in the twin tapes when ryan plays it at the house party, min is shown playing it too on his mini synth. what does this lead me to believe? he listened to the cassette enough to memorize the melody and figure out the notes to play it in-turn. ------
Also so ummmm ryan’s family (giggles) five kids, and hes the middle child. shits doomed. he never even had a chance. and its not unfounded or like probably exaggerated on ryan’s part either. in the bug car when theyre in jail and ryan says its just min’s parents who would be worried, min just says “yeah…..” he doesnt say thats not true or im sure theyre worried. no. min is fully aware of ryans family situation and didnt bother for a second to argue it.
and in the gallery car one of ryans outbursts is “why doesnt anyone care about how i feel” bro this cant NOT stem from his home life. LIKE homie deadass has middle kid syndrome where hes used to getting his feelings shafted especially. but anyway teehee i’ve read into it more but i think imma just write my fic since most of it is speculative lol. ----
okay and also theres the queue car that i have extended thoughts about but the one thing in specific that i think about is like. how min acts in it. he makes me so mad i love him but goddamn...
just the condescending attitude but its so important to him that he be right. if its ryans number that means ryan messed up. if its ryans number that means min was right. if its ryans number that means min didnt make a mistake in giving up his dream. like he wants to be proven right so he can feel justified and not be hung up on the regrets he clearly had doing shit like playing his mini synth in his work bathroom. and as my friend said “ nobody ever does anything theyre normal about in the work bathroom“ spittin. fr. anyway stfu about them gay boys
------
AMELIA.
just a heads up there’s like. quick talk about implied suicide in this section but yeah.
what was her relationship with One? what caused One to get split in two? why in the turtle car when speaking in unison did one-one say its his fault cause he hadnt been better? how did amelia come to have a position of trust with One in the first place?
its clear One respected her thoughts. she is the one who influenced One into returning passengers belongings so that they can individuate themselves. she provided her human opinion to fill in the holes of Ones computed and inadvertently callous decision makings on running the train
oh book 5 how i long for you... but anyway.
this girl. had no reason to be on the roof of her college dorm after the death of her husband. NONE. we know exactly how important her time in college with alrick was because its the part of her life she wanted to replicate most despite the fact they graduated. this + in he ceremony her “yeah…” sounds really resigned as if she didnt want to be graduating (the beginning display of a pattern of being adverse to moving on persnaps….). but this place is clearly important to her so it being the place she would attempt to take her life in grief makes sense to me. i also believe this was the intent of her being here from her saying im s1 ep10 that she doesnt want a life without alrick.
----
these are like. little details that i enjoyed a lot to contribute to showing how smart amelia is. like no one but her couldve taken over the train truly girlboss gaslight gatekeep amen.
amelias trick to play a tone into the receiver of the phone to control the network? thats what she does to control the steward. thats why her helmet beeped every time it moved or stopped. because she was issuing a command.
she implemented a fucking fail safe dude. she was not going to let anything stop her she was taking precautions. when tulip traps her in her tape, her helmet automatically starts to play an alarm. the steward not only ignores tulip but specifically goes to help amelia IM LIKE GIRL YOURE EVERYTHING.
----
i wanna. talk about the turtles. in s3 when amelia discovers that hazel is one of her failed attempts she mumbles something to the degree of “all because of that handkerchief" or w/e it was. “handkerchief?” you may be wondering? THIS ONE
after all these years she kept it. i can only be led to assume it was gifted to her by alrick. this is my gamer theory
-----
and about hazel irt amelia she is an attempted clone of alrick. shes not quite right obviously but she posses some of his memories even if she doesnt know why or where it came from. they exists within her almost innately her claiming she took dance classes? saying she knows amelia makes the best pancakes?
(heres a link to the other memories btw) haha.. ah..
----
the cat
these are like. the last two things that i think a lot about that probably wouldve been answered but real quick
i wanna know why simon is the only one who calls her that like she doesnt even introduce herself but that. hc that its because thats the nMe simon gave her like a child naming a pet
also i want to know why there was a negative connotation irt samantha’s attachment to objects when simon said “shes collecting again”
-----
okay but anyway obviously i have a lot more in-depth analyasis thoughts but this was like. more about small story telling details that i enjoyed. “why didnt you talk about book 2 at all” 🧍♂️ uh... i dunno. it started out as my fave book but its like my least favorite now after my 23rd watch of the show. i still like it but i dont think about it that deeply thats all.
#txt#ref#man dont even look at this please im begging this looks like one of those fandom long posts from 2014 or w/e#DONT LOOK AT ME#this is shrimply my scream hole for my own needs
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21 with reddie
21. Best Friends Sibling AU
This got way longer than I thought and I’m calling it ‘Get it right the First Time’ after the billy joel song okay ‘njoy! (WC: 1600+)
“He’s adopted. We all are.” Stan said out of the blue, after dinner.
“What?” Richie asked.
“Eddie. He’s adopted. So is Ben. Bill is too.” He said again, louder this time.
“I-I mean.. I guessed.” Richie shrugged. “Cause they’re white and you’re-” Richie threw a hand over at Stan. “Not.”
“Israeli.”
“I forgot the word.”
“clearly.”
“I-I didn’t have to know, dude, it’s not a big deal.” Richie stammered.
“You were staring at Eddie the entire meal.” Stan said loosely, eyes never leaving his book.
Richie shifted. He was staring at Eddie. How could he not? He was… gorgeous. Big grey eyes, freckled, tan skin, wavy blond hair and the cutest little face. He had a look of perpetual surprise and annoyance, like someone just stole his parking space.
He sat a the table quietly nearly the whole meal, watching the conversation with curiosity and every now and then, his eyes shifted over to Richie.
Richie couldn’t take his eyes off of the younger boy. He was so… pretty. The light from the dining room was framing his face this side of perfect, and his sweater was too big and it gave him the sweetest little sweaterpaws-
“I wasn’t staring at Eddie.”
Stan’s eyes looked up from his book, sharp and intelligent as usual. “Liar.”
“So what If I was?” Richie said, probably too defensively. “What’re you gonna do about it?”
“Give you my blessing.” Stan said from behind his book, light green eyes still locked on Richie.
“I don’t think I get you, Uris.” Richie lied, because he was quite sure he did. Rich hadn’t been subtle with his idiot grin and enthusiasm with trying to talk to Eddie, who didn’t reciprocate in the slightest.
“I think you do, Tozier.”
“Stanley?” Someone said from the door.
Richie looked up to see Eddie clamped around the door frame, sweater paws and cute grumpy surprise in full swing. Turns out he was wearing little shorts too. Richie gulped.
“Yes Eddie?” Stan said innocently, putting his book down.
Eddie shifted uncomfortably and looked Richie over, the frown in his lips grew. Richie felt a blush rise to his cheeks. “Can I talk to you for a second? Alone?”
“Sure.” Stan blinked, and stood up. He looked considerably older than his siblings, Richie decided, trying not to imagine his hands around Eddie’s thighs. “Rich, you’ll give us a minute?”
“Course.”
Stan left the room, and Eddie disappeared with him, leaving Richie alone with himself to think about how much Eddie licking his lips after dinner had drove him crazy.
I gotta stop. Richie thought, rubbing his face. Gonna go half chub thinking about it too much. He decided to mindlessly fiddle with his bracelets.
Stan strutted back into the room not longer later, sunk back down into his desk chair, handed Richie a small slip of paper and tucked his hands behind his neck, stretching out like a cat.
“Get out.”
Richie’s eyes widened. “Eddie doesn’t like me, does he?”
Stan shrugged ominously. “It’s me that wants you out.”
“Rude.”
“You have a crush on my baby brother.” Stan said simply.
“Baby.” Richie grinned.
“Out please.”
Richie huffed and grabbed his backpack. “I’ll see you tomorrow though yeah?” Stan nodded in response, and Richie left the room, closing the door behind him (He may be a douche but he wasn’t a barbarian.)
Richie silently gazed into the hallway. All the doors were labeled. Ben’s door was closed, Bill’s was half open (Though loud horror movie noises were coming from behind it.) and what Richie assumed was Eddie’s was wide open; the quiet sound of tapping the only sound from it.
The horror movie paused and Bill swung his door open, eyeing Richie curiously.
“Sup man?” Richie waved.
“W-What’re you doing?” Bill asked, voice lower and more angry than it had been at dinner.
“Uhhhhh I just left Stan cause he kicked me out and then I got lost in thoughts. What’s up with you?” Richie admitted.
Bill glared him up to down. Richie wasn’t sure why he was angry. They got along fine at dinner, joked about how they had no idea they both worked at the same place (Charlie’s vinyls, Bill had the day shift, Rich took the night shift) and now he was being judged.
“If you fuck over my brother, I’ll slaughter you.” Bill promised, and then closed the door.
“What?” Richie mumbled as the horror movie clicked back on.
Richie made a face and went down the hall, and couldn’t stop himself from peering into Eddie’s room.
There were lots of knick knacks everywhere, succulents, a big desk and Eddie curled up in his too big sweater, typing away on a laptop. He noticed Richie, clearly looking at him through the corner of his eye (still surprised and annoyed) and took a deep breath, trying to continue typing.
Richie gave a him a toothy smile. Eddie did not respond.
“So… Uh… Do you.. like… Did I- Um.” Richie tried. Words weren’t working.
Eddie sighed and got up from his chair and then-
closed the door.
Richie snapped some finger guns at the closed door. “Cool.” He said. “Dope I’ll uhhhhh see you later.”
-
That night, Richie nodded along to the music blasting through his headphones, and emptied his pockets. Wallet. Phone. Rings he forgot to put on after he washed his hands for dinner. Piece of paper Stan gave him that he never read. Pop can tab. Wait.
Richie picked up the paper and unfolded it. It had a small message written in red pen on it; it looked like it had been scribbled over relentlessly. It also had a snapchat username.
Snap: KasperEddie youre rly hot attractive and it makes me nervous but i wanna keep talking 2 to you - eddie (the small blonde one of stan’s brothers who gets really nervous around you)
Richie didn’t bother fighting the smile off his face. His day was looking up. Even though it was 11:26 at night.
He nabbed his phone and collapsed on his bed, adding Eddie’s username, and taking a quick photo of him lying in bed and sent it to the cutie patootie.
Tozier Boy🤙 (Trashrecords): Heyyyyyyyyy got ur message closing the door on me was rly sex c of u
The response was almost immediate. It was a photo of Eddie’s computer. Looks like he was writing an essay.
Eeeeeeee: Sorry you make me nervous I didn’t know what else to do
Richie grinned wildly and stuck his tongue out at the camera, still lying in bed
Tozier Boy🤙: ill let it slide cause youre cute as hell xox
Then he texted Stan.
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:29): you BASTART whyd u kick me out if eddie liked me
And got a snap from Eddie: A photo of his keyboard:
Eeeeeeee: oh!!!
“Holy fuck.” Richie whispered. “You are fucking adorable.”
and he sent Eddie a photo of his ceiling saying just that.
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:35): Because Eddie told me to. Said you made him nervous. He also told Bill he liked you and if you started speaking to Eddie Bill would put 30 rounds in your chest.
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:35): hot damn
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:36) Also; Ben wants you to come back over and give him “Romance Advice” because you seem “With it”
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:37): u never told me ben was a grandpa
The next image was of Eddie’s face, which was cute enough, except he had drawn blush onto himself. Eeeeeeee: thank you
Immediately following it was a black screen: omg im covered in acne and im sweaty im so sorry
Richie took a photo of him making a desperate face.
Tozier Boy🤙: can we go out i need to get you comfortable with me holding your cute little face as soon as fucking possible also can u go call Ben a grandpa its very important
A photo of a confused bed tucked into a beanbag chair: Eeeeeeee: he said stan JSUT called him that fjkdhflkjdhfjdkhjkd
Richie smiled against his pillow, trying to breath slowly to calm himself down. Holy fuck this fucking kid.
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:45) We’ve made Ben very sad.
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:45) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:46) He told me Eddie called him a grandpa too and made the “:(” face and then told me you just “Walk with.. uhm.. swagger and stuff. [You] just seem to know what he’s doing..” Little does he know-
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:46) who’s gonna tell him im dumbass
Then Richie went back to Eddie, trying to pull himself together, took a photo of his dog.
Tozier Boy🤙: so…. did u…… wanna …..hmmmmmmm… go out sometime.?
The next photo was of Eddie’s wide eyes, it was blurry, like he was moving as he took it.
Eeeeeeee: !!!!!! CAN U BRING UR DOG
“God damn.”
Tozier Boy🤙: which one I got 2 an old man corgi (Amante/Ames) and this baby (Bellissima/Belle)
Eeeeeeee: BOTH!!!! I WOULD DIE FOR THEM
Then Eddie sent another black screen.
Eeeeeeee: Fr though I would like a date. Do you like ice cream?
Tozier Boy🤙: im lack toes and taller ants i love ice cream how about this saturday at noon?
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:53): Eddie’s cackling madly what the fuck did you do
You to Stealink my NOTs (11:53) lack toes and taller ants dude
Stealink my NOTs to You (11:54): Cool. Stop it.
Eeeeeeee: sure!!
Richie dropped his phone to the side and danced against his bed. Waving his hands to The Safety Dance. Dates, dogs and cute boys. Okay.
He spent the rest of the night talking with Eddie, grinning widely the whole time.
#honkstory#i think i change styles... 40 different times#anyway#reddie#reddie fanfic#reddie fanficton#thanks for the request!#mine#richie#eddie#bill#stan#ben#ask#anon#fanfic#get it right the first time#best friends sibling au
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fat. FAT. P H A T RANT INCOMING FOR ANYONE WHO CARES TO READ THIS NONSENSE CUZ @haldidoodh ASKED
That episode literally blasted the last of my serotonin into smithereens but TBH??? WHO AM I MAD AT I should have seen this coming this whole volume has been such a headache. I cant be bothered to type up a coherent rwde essay on everything that bothered me this episode so im just gonna copy and paste my earlier yelling here instead ;A;
Team Rwby was god awful in episodes 11-12. They’re so self-righteous, entitled, hypocritical and cocky as a team and it doesnt help that they all suck as individual characters nowadays (except for weiss but even she lost best-girl points this episode also lmao blake and yang aren’t even INDIVIDUALS anymore they’re just bumbleby). It was annoying at first but now its just infuriating how rwby thinks theyre always right with their uwu energy and think they can do whatever tf they want with ZERO CONSEQUENCES.
Basically any time there is a problem in this show they have Ruby uwu at it and its solved lol.
They kept giving ironwood shit for taking on this incredible burden SO THAT NOBODY ELSE WOULD HAVE TO and rather than offer any real solution they just kept going “but mantle” like okay?? But remnant??? Like obvi letting mantle rot is bad but HE WAS OPEN TO ANY HELPFUL SUGGESTIONS CUZ HES OBVI AT HIS WITTS END AND DOESNT LIKE THE IDEA EITHER but yeah they just proceed to be the fattest hypocrites by hiding secrets of their own after being all “no more secrets uwu” and WHEN THEY GOT EXPOSED THEY JUST WENT “>:[“ (yangs self-righteous little glare here pissed me off so much oof) especially when ironwood was laying everything out in the open to them from the start. AND ESPECIALLY WHEN THE SECRET WAS FKIN “OH YEAH SALEM CANT DIE LOL” They watched ironwood make every decision he did in hopes of beating Salem while KNOWING she couldnt die??? So literallY WHERE do they get off on screeching at him with their yOu doNt hAvE to Suffer In ManTle YOu doNt kNow whAt iTs liKe bs. Wtf made ruby distrust iw at the start anyway? Because he had a bunch of ships out? They kept this CRUCIAL piece of information from him because he seemed stressed out?? Like what made ruby keep the secret from him. Someone tell me.
And the fact that rwby beat the ace-ops makes no goddamned sense. The power-scaling in this show is non-existant. We finally got to meet some pro huntsmen in this universe who aren’t teachers but are actually on the job, but because we gotta move out of the way for that 👌🏽✨ Power Of Friendship✨ and ✨rwby is always right✨ they somehow managed to beat experienced huntsmen with YEARS in the field who’ve actually graduated school??? FARM BOI OSCAR WHOS *JUST* LEARNING HOW TO FIGHT MANAGED TO LAND A PUNCH ON NEO FKIN POLITAN??? Didnt neo dance circles around yang??? Yang, who punches for a living and also beat mercury and adam??? I cant yall (and the fact that he didnt even bother to sneak up on her this boi literally screamed “no!!” as he ran down a hallway and neo didnt even have time to blink??? Pls)
Ruby’s “you were the best, until you trained us :3” -for maybe 2 days before my team went dancing ruby sis shut right tf up pls my god is this line just so. UNEARNED. Training in a room for a short while does not simply grant you the years of field experience the ace ops have and whAT IS UP WITH HER TRYING TO REASON WITH HARIETT AFTER SAYING THAT COCKY LINE AND FIGHTING HER??? WHAT and also like. The entire idea of “the ops lost cuz they weren’t good friends and were bad at teamwork uwu” is just so dumb. Ur telling me this group of high ranking hunstmen who’ve most likely been working together for at least a few years didnt have teamwork down??? Learning to work together is the most BASIC concept for a team to learn!! Its like the first thing a team has to perfect!! If the ace ops are supposed to be the best of atlas you dont think the ops would have gotten something as fundemental as teamwork down?? I dont buy it. And who gives a shit if they dont hang out after work or take selfies with eachother. Being friends doesnt necessarily mean theyre great at working together. If they succeed at relying on eachother to watch their backs, to keep each other alive (in the words of hariett herself) then Id think theyd know how to protect eachother i.e WORK TOGETHER.
And for all the ✨friendship✨ and ✨going through so much with someone✨ talk rwby like to do, the show barely displays these people acting like friends. We’re constantly TOLD how great of friends this group is, but the actual CONTENT we are shown leaves a lot to be desired. Tell me the last time ruby and blake teamed up in a fight. Or weiss and blake. Or yang and weiss. What teamwork?? Yang only interacts with blake now and weiss is only ever allowed to interact with ruby. Has blake ever said nora or ren’s name out loud? Have jaune and yang ever held a conversation between just them? Team rwby just spent a GOOD DEAL of time seperated from eachother, but when they reunite their teamwork is still somehow better than the ace ops?? Honestly its easier to believe that ruby is closer with team jnpr than she is her own team. If they showed the ops messing up during rwby vs ace ops fight due to lack of communication, then it still doesnt matter. My point is that they shouldnt have lacked teamwork in the first place.
Robyn was m e h this episode “JaMes ConTinUes to UnDeresTimAte Me” *proceeds to get knocked over in .3 seconds and is then KO for the rest of the episode* also great job for starting a fight and aiming to take clovers life in a moving airship with a terrorist on board when clover was acting PEACEFULLY and qrow was WILLING TO TALK IT OUT WITH IW and potentially work on a solution, but naw robyn is big mad and shall shoot.
Qrow made zero sense this episode too. I was with him right up until he chose TYRIAN OVER CLOVER??? THE PSYCOPATH WHO CANNOT BE REASONED WITH OVER THE RATIONAL DUDE YOU KNOW IS GOOD except clover wasnt acting rational in this fight at all and ill get to that AND IS THE ONLY FRIEND YOU HAVE WHOS NOT 19????? Qrow rly looked at tyrian- a man who is literally an enemy to all of remnant and went after ur neice- and said lets get rid of this punk together u and me bro. Like screw teaming with clover to bring down the dude you ACTUALLY have a grudge with whos also a serial killer and then trying to talk it out with clover whod be willing to do things peacefully why is this show like this
and AS FOR CLOVER. where were the braincells this episode. Qrow was trying to fight tyrian-the WAY bigger threat here, but clover??? kept knocking him away from tyrian and restraining him with his hook like??? YEAH LETS HELP OUT THE DEMON SCORPION CRACKHEAD HES CLEARLY NOT THE PRIORITY ATM nvm clover deserved to die there m8
His death scene was emotional and I feel bad for Qrow but u literally sealed his death when u ganged on him with tyrian so why are you even surprised. And on the subject of fairgame, im glad it didnt happen. Qrow was in no state for romance and I was glad he finally had a friend. He just spent the last volume thinking he wasted his life away helping oz, drowning in misery, drinking til he passed out on the street and so drunk he couldnt even be of any help during the apathy situation, when up til now hes been shown to fight just fine while drunk. I don’t see this as a “bury your gays trope” because clover was never confirmed to be gay and all their scenes added up to 40 seconds of platonic friendship. These two are grown ass men, if they had the hots for eachother then im pretty sure they could openly show it and not dance around it like theyre kids. I do feel bad for mlm viewers who were hoping for some rep with fairgame/lucky charms (cuz rt only cares if ur a cute marketable lesbian) but idc for the overly entitled fans who try to force their own headcanons on the writers and go feral when they dont get what they want. You dont just get to prance around claiming whats canon and what isnt. If rep is there then great, but if it isnt, then why not look somehwere else and let the author tell the story theyre trying to tell? Shipping fairgame cuz you think its cute is absolutely fine but not when u start getting ready to casterate crwby for not catering to you. Also, rwby sucks with lgbt+ rep anyway so what were yall expecting.
The only thing that was great this episode was the chorerography. It just sucks that the animation/choreo continues to improve while the writing doesnt. Another thing that really fell off this episode was the whole “we’re friends but we have to fight” drama. It doesnt work when its only ONE SIDE SHOWING ANY DISTRESS OVER IT. Only the ace ops (marrow, clover, the vine dude) seemed to show distress over having to fight rwby (it sucks that the only 1v1 weiss has won was because marrow was going EASY on her cuz he didnt wanna fight her fr) but rwby???? They didnt give any shits. They were so quick to turn against them and aim for their heads. They were SMILING as they ran at the ace ops, while they looked conflicted. If you oppose their UwU philosophy, you’re dead to them.
I really wanna enjoy RWBY but sometimes this show (and the fndm) really tests me. Its ironic how this episode came right after last episode, which I thought was the best chapter this volume. Anyway I rate this 10/10 cuz it gave me best character ironwood and best boi marrow and I would like to give them hugs for carrying this volume on their backs. (Also tyrian and penny and winter have been great too)
#oof just oof#and idegaf about cinder yall#lowkey hoping she gets all the maiden powers so she can finally beat rwby up and HUMBLE them a little#rwby#rwby vol 7#rwde
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Will you catch me if I fall for you?
Elu Marvel AU
mostly written for @anxetyt1me and everyone else that are going to enjoy this
Summary:
Eliott is an ambitious archer boy who decides to join the Avengers when an opportunity crosses his way. Little does he know that his heart is going to be captured by one of the twins HYDRA experimented on. Lucas and his twin sister Manon just survived the attack of Ultron in Sokovia, but they are already training to become Avengers. The boy is a cheeky bastard who likes playing games. This time his target is Eliott and he can always get what he wants.
Enjoy *finger guns*
Eliott knew the compound will be huge, he saw it on tv, but he was still in shock as he got out of his taxi. He paid for the ride, it wasn’t cheap, but he was willing to sacrifice all he had just to get here. He grabbed the strap of the quiver attached to his torso, feeling the weight of the steel arrows and his bow pulling him down. It felt like his legs were turned into concrete, heavy and immovable. Every step was like an eternity, his palms started sweating as he made his way inside the gigantic front yard towards the Avengers building. There was a chopper on his right, just waiting on the parking spot, ready to fly away at anytime. He knew the people who lived inside wouldn’t use it, they had flying supersuits, special wings, superpowers and quinjets. They liked to make a fancy entrance, especially Tony Stark. Not like any of this mattered in this exact moment.
He swallowed the lump in his throat, continuing his road towards the front of the building. Feet still heavy, heart thumping, threatening to burst out of his chest. Now that would be a good introduction.
As he got closer, he had to squint his eyes, protecting it from the piercing sunlight that was reflecting from the gigantic windows. The weather was nice, not too hot, soft clouds swimming through the endless, blue pool above. He stopped, looking at his outfit. Black leather, tight and well fitting, belts snaking around his waist, his thighs, keeping his throwing knives - silver ones with handles carved out of bones - safe. Boots perfectly melted on his feet, thick sole, strengthened with steel. Hands covered in leather gloves that let his fingers free, except the index and middle finger on his right one. Designed especially for professional archers like him.
He got kicked out of his thoughts rather literally when a blue flash appeared out of nowhere. During his years of hard practice and training, it was clear that his senses were extraordinary, just like his reflexes, but he still had problems focusing his attention. That’s what made this situation possible where he was laying on the ground, the handle of his bow hardly pressed to his back as a feet on his chest placed pressure on him. Gasping for air he tried to open his eyes, which wasn’t so easy considering the sun was shining right at his face, but then a shadowy silhouette leaned over him. His eyelids fluttered open, trying to take in his surroundings and for a second Eliott was sure it would be less blinding to stare at the sun.
The boy was gorgeous. Fluffy brown hair surrounding a beautiful, smooth face with perfectly curved nose, pink lips and those damn blue eyes. Eliott wasn’t a poetic boy, but he could write long essays about the beauty of just those irises alone. He knew he was staring, mouth agape, not able to form the words, but it seemed like the boy had a clue who he was. With a slight movement he tilted his head to the side, cocking an eyebrow. The smirk that appeared on his face was probably the most beautiful thing Eliott had ever seen, hands down.
“You are the boy Clint is waiting for?” He spoke up and fuck, his voice was soft and smooth like warm honey, having a slight french accent, which just made him 1000 times more attractive. His foot was still pressing the archer boy down, not like he had any problems with it. He could put a leash around his neck, there wouldn’t be a complaint coming from his side.
After long minutes of just staring into each other’s eyes, Eliott realized that there was a question he needed to answer. The boy above him didn’t seemed to be annoyed, on the contrary there was a playful spark in those ocean blue eyes. Trying to take a deep breath wasn’t a good idea considering he was pinned to the ground, but he did anyways, just to help himself find some confidence to speak with this angel.
“Yes…” he muttered, voice sounding rather raspy. “My name is Eliott.” He managed to say it, but he kept finding himself at a loss of words under the gaze of the person above him.
“Welcome to the Avengers compound, pretty boy.” He said, leaning down even more and with that placing more pressure on Eliott’s already hurting chest. “You are going to have fun.” He added with a cheeky smile on his pretty face. Eliott knew he would already do anything for this boy without a single question just to see him smile again. He was pretty much fucked.
“Lucas, what are you doing?” The high pitched voice came from where the entrance of the gigantic building was. Eliott could see the outlines of a girl, slim body, wearing black skirt, a grey shirt with a scarlet red jacket. Her curly hair was like a brown waterfall, surrounding a pretty face. Eliott could notice the similarities between her and the boy, Lucas’ features, not mentioning the soft French accent of both.
“Nothing.” He replied and within a blink of an eye the pressure was gone from Eliott’s chest.
He could only see the blue flash as the angelic boy returned to his sister. Now he knew who they were, the Lallemant Twins, Lucas and Manon. Orphans that were used by the psychopath HYDRA scientists, experimenting and torturing them, making them have special powers to then use them as weapons against their enemies. But they got out, sided with the Avengers and helped them defeat the army of Ultron, the crazy robot that tried to drop the city of Sokovia on the Earth to destroy humanity with it. Of course Eliott didn’t know the details, but he had seen a lot of videos, read articles and interviews with people who were there during the battle. Lots of the citizens died or got hurt, it was a hard price to pay for saving everyone else. That’s what it means being an Avenger, Eliott knew it.
He slowly got up from the ground, being sure that his back has a bow handle shaped hole now. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t take his eyes off the boy, who was now having a quiet conversation with his twin sister. He just realized what Lucas was wearing and he just didn’t know how to process that sight. The pants were fine, loose ones, black colored with two white stripes on the sides of his thighs, but the top… He was wearing a well fitting, long sleeved shirt, a combination of dark blue and grey mixing on it with lighting bolt shaped white stripes just on the place where his stomach area started. And it was tight, like really tight.
Without realizing that he started walking forward, he suddenly found himself being close enough to catch some of their talk. It turned out to be difficult to focus on the actual words being said while seeing and hearing Lucas speak. The boy was just so soft and beautiful, Eliott couldn’t believe he actually fought with an army of lethal robots alongside big names like Clint Barton, Thor or Captain America. It just seemed impossible for this soft looking boy to hurt even a fly.
“-cking care what he said, I’m going to handle this one.” Lucas sounded just a little bit frustrated as he was talking to his sister. Manon looked at Eliott over her brother’s shoulder and then let out a frustrated sigh.
“Fine, but I am not going to save your ass from Clint again.” She said and with a smooth movement she spun around on her heels, disappearing behind the glass door.
Eliott just stood there dumbfounded, as the other turned to him, wide smirk plastered to his face. Realization hit like a truck, only noticing now how small the boy in front of him actually was. He could hug him from behind, resting his chin on the top of his head easily. And damn if that didn’t make him want this brunette even more.
“So, why are you here actually?” Lucas asked, trying to sound nonchalant with little success. He opened the door for the tall one who nodded as thanks, walking inside.
~°~
Eliott was glad when they arrived to the training room where Clint Barton waited for them. Their walk was really awkward, at least to him, Lucas seemed to enjoy circling around him, asking the most random things. ‘How old are you?’ ‘Where are you from?’ ‘Are those knives on you thighs?’ ‘Wanna try throwing one at me?’ ‘Is this your natural hair color?’ ‘Can I touch your hair?’ ‘You wanna touch my hair?’ Of course he could barely stutter out a few words, completely embarrassing himself. This was the first time he felt so nervous around someone that he lost his voice and wasn’t able to speak. Usually he had too much confidence, being aware of his looks and skills, but this very short and also very fast boy seemed to make him turn into a shy, stuttering mess.
As he stepped into the huge, empty room made out of steel and concrete. Half of the floor was covered in what looked like auburn linoleum, while the other half had epdm rubber flooring. In the middle stood the guy himself. The person Eliott looked up for ever since he heard the rumors about him. Clint Barton aka Hawkeye, the best archer in the whole world. Hair perfectly styled, oil green shirt loosely hanging on his well trained body, tight jeans wrapped around his legs, tucked into black boots. Suddenly his nervousness got doubled, hands getting sweaty. Lucas stepped forward, putting his hands on his waist. The man squinted his eyes at him before his face broke into a wide smile.
“There you are, you little bastard. I was looking for you.” Cint said, walking to the boy and patting him on the shoulder. “I see you found my visitor.” his eyes wandered towards the tall boy, who had to swallow, wiping off the sweat from his palms.
“Yeah, he’s fun, but very quiet.” Lucas responded, now turning around, another pair of eyes landing gazes on Eliott.
“I… My name is Eliott.” he managed to force out the words. This would be much more easier, if that angelic brunette wouldn’t be there with them in the room.
“Yeah, I know.” Clint said, looking at the boy next to him now. “Leave us alone, Lucas. I think you have training with Nat and Manon today.” he said cocking an eyebrow, sounding like a father who’s talking to his rather stubborn son. It was endearing to see this kind of relationship that Eliott could never had in his life.
His father left him and his mother when he was just a baby, not even bothering to pay child support or visiting his son. He grew up in bad circumstances, struggling with money, which lead his mother to borrow cash from the most shady people. That’s why she ended up with a bullet in her head, that’s why Eliott got captured when he was 12, being tortured and trained to be their deadly assassin. To their bad luck, they couldn’t erase all the memories he shared with the mother they killed, so he waited. When the perfect opportunity came, he killed them all and escaped. Since then he was roaming the countries, leaving Paris and all its filth behind. Until he found out that the Avengers are looking for rookies, training them to become fighters. So he called the number, talked to a few people and now he was here. After long years of suffering, loneliness and fear, he found the place where he can get a reason to live.
He got dragged out of his spiraling thoughts when a blue flash, probably Lucas passed by him, leaving with the feeling of soft fingers brushing through his hair. It was so sudden and unexpected that he almost lost his balance, barely saving himself of landing on his back yet again. That boy really liked to play with him, using his speed to get maximum advantage.
“I’m sorry about the kid.” Spoke Clint now, walking closer to Eliott, who quickly shook his head as weak try to get rid of the clinging feeling of the brunette’s touch. “I guess he’s excited. He is not allowed to leave the compound, so he doesn’t really have the chance to meet new people.” He explained with a soft smile on his face.
“How old is he?” Eliott decided to ask, because he was genuinely curious about the boy. It felt like something inside him was pulling him towards Lucas, like they were connected.
“He’s 17, too young if you ask me.”
“Life doesn’t care how old you are, it just throws shit at your face and expects you to handle it.” Eliott replied, looking at his personal hero, who seemed to be impressed by his words.
“I can’t wait for you to meet Nat, I think she would like you.” He said smirking.
~°~
A whole week passed, filled with long hours of training with either Clint or Natasha. They were really good, like real professionals, which made Eliott realize that his skills weren’t much above average compared to them. But this just kept fueling his determination to become stronger, faster, never missing a shot.
Sometimes as he met Lucas on the hallways or in the kitchen, but they didn’t have much time to talk both of them occupied with their own training. It still couldn’t make the archer boy forget about that soft touch or ignore the way sometimes the other was looking at him. Those ocean blue eyes haunted his dreams, chasing away the usual nightmares he had ever since he slaughtered his torturers. He knew they were bad people, that they deserved to die, if not for their other crimes, then just for killing his innocent mother. And still flashes of spilling blood, echoes of death screams and the sight of lifeless bodies were the only thing he could hear and see once he closed his eyes. Up until he met this gorgeous boy.
It was Tuesday, his usual training were canceled due to a mission both Natasha and Clint had to participate in. Something happened that involved a guy named Brock Rumlow, so Captain Rogers decided to follow the leads. Eliott only had the chance to see the actual big names from afar considering both Tony Stark and Captain America were busy people. He once had a chance to chat with Sam Wilson, he’s a sympathetic dude with great humor, Eliott liked him a lot. Then there was Manon, the quiet one out of the twins. She’s spending most of her time with either Vision, the android with crazy powers or Natasha, trying to learn how to use her abilities in battle.
Since there wasn’t much thing for him to do without training, he decided to spend his time outside by the river. He sat on the side of the wooden platform, back resting to one of the pillars that held the roof above his head. He looked at the sketchbook placed on his lap, opened on two blank pages, pen laying on his right ear. It was a long time ago since he had time to actually draw something, but he knew exactly what - or more like who - he wanted to draw. The person that got stuck in his mind ever since they met on the driveway of the compound. Someone with eyes so blue that the sky feels jealous, the ocean wants to hide by the sight of them.
He let out a deep sigh, dragging his eyes away from the sketchbook to the calm water, trying to enjoy the quiet. There wasn’t any noise coming from inside the building like always, no one was arguing with F.R.I.D.A.Y. or training with explosives. There wasn’t a thing that could ruin this perfect moment. At least he thought so, until a certain fast boy appeared out of nowhere, creating a wind that almost flew Eliott’s sketchbook out of his lap into the river. Thankfully he had enough consciousness to catch it in time, saving it from getting soaked. He shot an angry look at the short boy, who was standing in front of him now, innocent smile plastered to his face. He was wearing sports grey sweatpants and a white shirt with the word ‘Désir’ written on it. Eliott hated the fact how he looked fucking gorgeous in those clothes too.
“How’s it going?” he asked, running his fingers through the already disheveled hair. Eliott rolled his eyes, clutching his sketchbook to his chest to protect it from the chaos that this brunette was.
“I was doing fine just a second ago.” Eliott replied. Just because he had a crush on this demonic angel, it didn’t mean he can’t be annoyed with his behavior. During the time he had spent here, it became crystal clear that Lucas lived on annoying the hell out of everyone. Which wasn’t that hard considering his abilities.
“Wow, someone’s grumpy.” he smirked and crouched down just so their eyes could be on the same level. “I didn’t know you are drawing.” he said, nodding his head towards the sketchbook.
“Only when I have time.” He said, his sudden anger starting to fade away, giving more space to the fucking nervousness again. This boy was affecting him in ways no one ever did before, which was a tad bit scary. Like the way he smiled made his heart beat crazy fast. “What do you want anyways?” he managed to ask.
“Well, since we both have some free time, I thought we could hang out.” he shrugged and sat down now too, pulling up his knees to his chest, resting his arms on it. Eliott tried not to focus on the veins that were clearly visible on his hands and forearms like this.
“I would prefer to be alone.” He mumbled and that was the biggest lie in the history, because he wanted Lucas to stay, even if they don’t talk.
“Yeah, I don’t care. I am going to stay.” He said with a wide smirk, resting his chin on his arms now, long eyelashes fluttering at him. Eliott was afraid that his heart is going to burst out of his chest. “So… you are an archer boy and an artist? What other talents you have?” He asked curiously, wiggling his perfectly curving eyebrows. The tall one sighed and dragged his eyes away from the boy, just to make talking easier.
“That’s all basically. I am good at shooting and throwing stuff. I rarely miss my target.” His eyes followed a piece of grass floating down the river. This place was so calming and peaceful. It was a long time ago since he got a chance to appreciate nature and its beauty in any kind of way. He forgot how nice the summer breeze can feel on a heated day. How beautiful water looks when it’s mirroring the cloudless, bright blue sky. Everything in this world seemed to be so nice, innocent and sweet in this very moment, almost letting him forget about all the horrors he had seen in his life. All the things he had done. People he killed, tortured and hurt. These just faded away in the bright sunlight, the soft wind taking them far away, leaving nothing but serenity behind.
“What about the drawing?” Lucas voice dragged him out of his thoughts so suddenly he got startled, letting his sketchbook go that was falling towards the water. Everything happened so fast, but within a blink of an eye, his sketchbook as home from his sight. He turned his head towards the boy in front of him, the black notebook in his hands. “That was close.”
“Can you give me back?” He blurted out instead of saying thank you, which was not very polite, but he couldn’t care less. That sketchbook was too important for him.
“What will I get if I give you back?” Lucas asked, playful smile appearing on his face as he got up and took a few steps back, keeping the notebook behind himself. Eliott squinted his eyes at the boy.
“Nothing, that’s mine!”
“But I saved it for you, therefore I deserve a reward, right?” He kept grinning as the archer boy got up, trying to get his sketchbook back, but he started just swaying around quickly and flawlessly.
“No, it’s not how it works. Give it back, Lucas!”
“Come and get it, Robin Hood!” He smirked, sticking out his tongue, slowly backing towards the building. Eliott walked forward with a determined look on his face, but deep inside he kinda enjoyed this little play. Lucas was adorable as he used his speed to get an advantage over him every time he tried to get back the little book.
“You are so annoying! Give it back!”
“I want a reward!”
“What reward?” Eliott sighed, stopping now, placing his hands on his waist. The other one also staying put, looking at him mischievously.
“Stay there and close your eyes.” he replied, bouncing on his feet excitedly. It was just so fucking adorable that Eliott couldn’t resist him, so he just let out a defeated sigh, closing his eyes slowly. He could feel the wind brushing through his hair, his nose filling with a scent he couldn’t recognize at first. It was like the smell of air right after the storm. Then before he could react, soft lips touched his own ever so slightly and carefully like being afraid of rejection. He opened his eyes just a little, taking in the sight of Lucas being so damn close, his features seemed even more beautiful, eyelashes casting long shadows on his pink cheeks. Hair falling to his face, making him look like the young, innocent boy he actually was. And fuck if Eliott didn’t fell for him in that exact moment.
His hands moved on their own, grabbing the brunette’s waist, pulling him so close their bodies were almost pressed at each other and he captured those cherry lips with his own. He could feel the boy gasping into the kiss, the notebook falling out of his hands, landing on the wooden floor with a soft thump. Soft hands were snaking their way up on Eliott’s back, grasping into the black shirt he was wearing. Their kiss started off slow, searching, trying to see how far they can go with the other. In the next moment Eliott found himself pressed to a wooden pillar, the rough material digging into his skin, while a soft body was grinding on his front side. That was probably the best thing he had ever felt. With one hand he kept holding the boy’s waist, while the other was sliding down to grab his thigh, pulling him even closer.
After long minutes of kissing and trying to eat up the other’s face, Eliott pulled back, examining the boy, his flushed cheeks, swollen lips and his ocean eyes that were filled with desire. At least his shirt was accurate, which made the older one smirk. Lucas smirked back at him, fingers gripping into Eliott’s messy locks, pulling him down for an open mouthed kiss this time. Tongues swirling around each other. Not even the soft summer breeze could cool down their bodies now that they were burning in passion.
Their heated up making out session was disturbed by the sound of the Avengers quinjet landing not too far from them. The boys broke apart, looking into each other’s eyes, smiling like idiots. Before Eliott could say a word, Lucas grabbed his hand, squeezing it slightly and started to walk towards the building with him.
“Let’s go and welcome the others.” he said on a cheerful tone, trying to fix his mess of a hair with his free hand. Eliott let out a heartfelt laugh and placed a soft kiss on the top of his head.
“Sure thing, Sonic.” he muttered into his hair to which he got a disapproving look from the boy.
“Fuck off.”
“Nah, you convinced me to stay. Now you gotta deal with my shit.” his smile didn’t seem to disappear anytime soon and damn if that wasn’t feeling good. Lucas gasped, placing his hand over his heart, faked shock plastered to his face.
“Oh, mon dieu! What have I done to myself?” voice dripping from sarcasm, while he was still holding Eliott’s hand. The tall boy laughed, pulling him closer and disentangling their fingers just so he could throw his arm around Lucas’ shoulder, realizing how well he fits there.
“Just shut up.”
“Make me!” Lucas retorted, stopping in their tracks, turning his head to the side. That expectant look on his face was so alluring and sweet, Eliott couldn’t resist. Why would he resist? Therefore he closed the short distance between them, locking their lips together in a soft, slow kiss.
When the weight disappeared from under him alongside with the soft mouth that was pressed to his just a second ago, he almost lost his balance, landing on the floor. He heard laughing from afar, turning his head towards the sound. Lucas was standing in the doorway, leaning to the frame, swinging Eliott’s sketchbook in his hands victoriously.
“Come on, Robin Hood! We have to go.” he said with his cheeky smile that made the tall boy’s heart beating faster. He shook his head with a soft laugh, jogging towards the building where the other was waiting for him.
Now in this very moment Eliott felt like his life had a reason, that all those things happened to him in the past weren’t just to fuck him over, but to lead him towards this moment. He was meant to be here, meeting Lucas, falling for him. It sounded cheesy, so he would probably never admit it out loud, but in this playful boy he found his reason to keep going. And so he will, because he is not gonna let anyone take this away from him. Not this time.
~°~
Make sure to leave a comment or your opinion on this ficlet! I am super nervous, cause I can’t decide if this is a good one or not, but I really wanted to publish it already.
Bious
#Skam France#Elu#An AU no one asked for#Elu MARVEL AU#Eliott Demaury#Lucas Lallemant#Elu fic#Elu fanfic#LEAVE COMMENTS#Lucas and Manon are twins yes#Eliott is a stuttering mess#but he's coming thru#they kiss#ony Clint Barton is presented#because reasons
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