#and there's not much to do but agree and hope that makes it better

[can-i-make-image-descriptions]

[Image IDs: Text reading: I have known Elon Musk at a deep level for 14 years, well before he was a household name. We used to text frequently. He would come to by birthday party and invite me to his parties. He would tell me everything about his women problems. As sons of highly accomplished men who married venuses, were violent and lost their fortunes, and who were bullied in high school, we had a number of things in common most people cannot relate to. We would hang out together late in Los Angeles. He would visit my San Diego lab. He invested in my company.

Elon is not a Nazi, per se.

He is something much better, or much worse, depending on how you look at it.

Nazis believed that an entire race was above everyone else.

Elon believes he is above everyone else. He used to think he worked on the most important problems. When I met him, he did not presume to be a technical person—he would be the first to say that he lacked the expertise to understand certain data. That happened later. Now, he acts as if he has all the solutions.

All his talk about getting to Mars to "maintain the light of consciousness" or about "free speech absolution" is actually BS Elon knowingly feeds people to manipulate them. Everything Elon does is about acquiring and consolidating power. That is why he likes far right parties, because they are easier to control. That is also why he gave himself $56 Billion which could have gone to the people actually doing the work and innovations he is taking credit for at Tesla (the reason he does not do patents is because he would not be listed as an inventor as putting a fake inventor on a patent would kill it and moreover it would reveal the superstars behind the work). His lust for power is also why he did xAI and Neuralink, to attempt to compete with OpenAI and NeuroVigil, respectively, despite being affiliated with them. Unlike Tesla and Twitter, he was unable to conquer those companies and tried to create rivals. I fired him with cause in December 2021 when he tried to undermine NV.

Elon did two Nazi salutes.

He did them for five main reasons:

He was concerned that the "Nazi wing" of the MAGA movement, under the influence of Steve Bannon, would drive him away from Trump, somewhere in the Eisenhower Executive Office Building, rather than in the West Wing which is where he wants to be. He was already feeling raw over the fact that Trump did not follow his recommendation for Treasury Secretary and that the Senate also did not pick his first choice.

He was upset that he had had to go to Israel and Auschwitz to make up for agreeing with a Nazi sympathizer online and wanted to reclaim his "power" just like when he told advertisers to "go fuck yourself". This has nothing to do with Asperger's;

There are some Jews he actually hates: Sam Altman is among them;

He enjoys a good thrill and knew exactly what he was doing;

His narcissistic self was hoping the audience would reflect the abject gesture back to him, thereby showing complete control and dominion over it, and increasing his leverage over Trump. That did not happen

Bottom line: Elon is not a Nazi but he did give two Nazi Salutes, which is completely unacceptable.

N.B. For the few whining about my post "sans connaissance the cause" and either trembling about my having shattered their illusions about their cult leader or thinking I am defending Elon:

I. My point is that he is transactional rather than ideological;

II. That being said, I am not defending him or his actions, just explaining them and confirming that he did, in fact, do two Nazi Salutes if anyone had doubts or believed the doctored footage of Taylor Swift doing the same thing to normalize what Elon did;

III. At some point, it matters to a few people if one is a Nazi or if one acts like one. My father was a Holocaust Survivor. 32 out of 35 of his family members were murdered by the Nazis. My mother's grandparents were murdered in Auschwitz;

IV. After Elon tried to manipulate NV's stock in 2021, I fired him with cause, and he was unable to exercise his stock options. In the aftermath of the Nazi Salutes, I told both him and his wealth manager to fuck off. Any remaining friendship between us ended with the Nazi Salutes. He is blocked on my end and I am pretty sure I am blocked on his;

V. I did not share what he told me in confidence. I just happened to know him extremely well, the person, the aspirations and the Musk Mask;

VI. I know who I am, have no desire to be famous and give exceedingly few media interviews. I prefer to work in obscurity and let the work speak for itself. I am certainly not envious and would definitely not want Elon's life, including living in a bubble and having to make one outlandish claim after another and manipulate the public, elections and governments to shore up my stock and prevent the bubble from bursting. Unlike Elon, I am an actual scientist and inventor and I am not pretending to be someone I am not like a fellow who got his BA in Econ at 26 all of a sudden pretending to be an expert in mechanical engineering, chemistry, rocket science, neuroscience and AI and keeping the people actually doing the work hidden and paying people to play online games in his name to appear smart and feed his so-called "Supergenius" Personality Cult—the "Imperator" has no clothes, and he knows it. I am just very disappointed in what happened to someone I had a lot of deep admiration for and the first person to found out about my concerns about his behavior was always him;

VII. He is the one who betrayed a number of his friends, including Sergey, and, given his actions, many other people who believed him and believed in him. I have no sympathy for this behavior, and at some point, after having repeatedly confronted it in private, I believe the ethical thing to do is to speak out, forcefully and unapologetically, whatever the risks may be, so as to not be part of the timid flock remaining silent while evil is being done, including propping up far right governments around the world in part to deregulate his companies and become the first trillionaire and otherwise to "rule the planet"—he knows Mars won't be terraformed in his lifetime and he really wants his planet. No joke... Ethics matter. People matter. The truth matters.

I took down Descartes (through the Cambridge Declaration on Consciousness) and I am definitely not afraid of a so-called inventor whose greatest invention in his image.

I will not be silent. You should not be either. I am a sovereign individual, and so are you. I stoop up to bullies, and am stepping out of the dark to do it again.

Stop working for him and being exploited by him. Sell your Tesla and dump your Tesla stock. Nikola Tesla was a great, creative and courageous man who led with ethics and by example and he would not have wanted for his good name to have been used by him and would agree with my principled stance. Sign off of "X" which is boosting far right propaganda, and of your Starlink as well. He is a complete cunt who doesn't give a shit about you—only about power. Just ask Reid Hoffman. He only wants to control, dominate and use you—don't let him and cut him and his business out of your and your loved ones' lives entirely. Remember he is a total miserable self-loathing poser, and unless you are too, he will be much more afraid of you than you should ever be of him.

He will probably come after me, and I am completely fine with that. I am a self-made multibillionaire with an armada of lawyers—literally—and most importantly, I know who I am and who I stand for, the people and their freedoms, whatever happens. He can send his dumb Proud Boys and Oath Keepers after me and they will be butchered on sight. Either way, I would rather die with honor than live as a coward.

"Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."—Elie Wiesel, Holocaust Survivor and Nobel Peace Prize laureate /End IDs]

[moonchild1]

jeon jungkook fic rec list (Ⅺ)

hi everyone i am back and boy has there been some amazing fics posted while i was away it's awaken that spark in me again and this list is honestly packed, i went over like 60 fics for this one and i even added some of my ult. faves. the ones i have to mention again because they are just so amazing, trust me you will be going back for more over and over again too. you might notice some fics from ao3 and wattpad included as well they are hold a special place in my heart, they are masterpieces that need to be shared with you guys so please enjoy this new list and give all the authors mentioned all the love and respect they deserve seriously they work so hard on creating these beautiful fics and they deserve all the attention and gratitude we can offer them so please share your love through a like, comment and reblog them so they can feel the love and more people can find their masterlists and accounts because they have some really good fics there as well. I just wanna send an honourable mention to every single writer i have added to this list without you i would not have so much happiness when i come on this app and you have filled my heart and countless others with so much joy and happiness we appreciate you more than you will ever know and you make being here 10 times better your stories help us through alot and puts smiles on our faces and we get to spend time with a community of people who love what we love and we get to interact because of your ideas and it creates such an amazing experience so thank you for everything that you do the worlds you create and the ideas you come up and for sharing it all with us i adore you so much and you are just the best so once again thank you for everything and i look forward to what so many of you have planned - kiki ♡

NO MINORS ALLOWED PLEASE DON'T INTERACT!

happy reading everyone i hope you enjoy this extra long list of my faves and please remember to be happy and keep on smiling and interact if you want i love hearing from you guys and if you want you can send me a few of your faves 🥹🖤✨

f - fluff s-smut a - angst

series

lines of fate by @kookiestarlight s a exes au zombie apocalypses tattooist jk

⋆ the last thing Jungkook ever imagined was an outbreak that turned the dead into the living. But even more unexpected is seeing you—an ex he’s known nothing about in the past four years—with a small child who bears a striking resemblance to himself. As Jungkook grapples with the shock and the city spirals into chaos, the two of you are thrust back together, forced to confront unresolved feelings, long-buried truths, and the horrors of the deadly virus taking over.

lost stars by @hueseok f a roommates e2l slow burn college au (33.2k)

⋆ the last person you’d expect to be there for you is your roommate, jeongguk, on the night you break up with your cheating boyfriend; because as far as you’re concerned, the both of you aren’t exactly friends, and he definitely shouldn’t be running to get you upon hearing you sob via phone call.so when he does, you begin thinking that maybe you’ve just been hard on him over the years, or perhaps he just liked pretending to be an annoying shit most of the time. either way, it becomes the beginning of an unexpected friendship finally blossoming.

a lovers kiss by @/hueseok f s a fwb i2l college au (55.6k)

⋆ a friends with benefits relationship never ends on a good note. unless, both parties are not dumb fucks who find themselves falling for each other along the way of their agreement, of course. and in yours and jeongguk’s case, you should have known better than to think the two of you would be an exception to the so-called curse of being friends with benefits with someone you already hold dear to you, since not even five months since it was agreed upon—the line between being only friends and being a little like lovers only continue to get hazier and hazier.

hell is empty by @aquagustd f s a ft.kth love triangle dadJK exJK CEO kth (164.4k)

⋆ life has a tendency to throw things your way when you least expect it, when you’re content, and the ominous presence knows exactly how to steer your existence back into the darkness.

to the stars by arckook (ao3) a zombie apocalypse (94.6k)

⋆ It was always you, and Jimin, and your best friend Jihyun. But fate, regardless of whether you believed in it or not, had other plans for you. Jimin told you once, "It's a tough road to the stars." Nowadays it was hard to believe the stars were somewhere you could reach.

moirai by norabean (ao3) f s a soulmates slow burn (95.2k)

⋆ On your 18th birthday a name appears on your wrist. The name of your soulmate. It’s a momentous day that everyone looks forward to, but you’ve always brushed aside; refusing to believe in a fickle mistress called destiny. But what happens when on the morning of your 18th birthday you wake to find the name of your mortal enemy? Jeon Jungkook.

from home by @yuzukult f s a e2l richkid jk fakedating au (89.5k)

⋆ a rich kid who gets cut off from family money meets an average post-grad girl who may be the key to getting him back on his parents’ good side.

and they were roommates by @hoseok666 f s a ft. kth e2l love triangle tsundere jk s2l (103.k+)

⋆ it all started with a rejection from your longtime crush, jeon jungkook. you decided to confess to him on your last day of high school. after a harsh rejection and a rough summer dealing with the heartbreak, you were starting anew once your freshman year of college came. you were going to be sharing an apartment with two other roommates that you don’t even know. what a surprise you’re going to be in for once you find out it’s the one and only: jeon jungkook and kim taehyung.

future hearts by @jungblue f s a ft. pjm punk jikook s2l band au f2l lost love (114.6k)

⋆ It was everything, from his tattoos, to his touches, to the way sweat rolled down his neck as he strummed into his guitar on stage; everything about him completely enthralled you. So why are you now, two and a half years later, on a train to Seoul, telling a complete stranger the recollection of how you became fated to forever have scars on all of your future hearts due to the happiness, but most of all the pain, that came along with falling in love with Jeon Jungkook.

mind games by @yerion f a tsundere jk roommates au (31.8k)

⋆ jungkook drives you to think strict criticism isn’t too bad, purely because you didn’t expect things to turn a bit steamier than intended. as the one and only female esports player, misery was at your fingertip when your skills suddenly deteriorated. however, the stoic leader of your team—jungkook, simply couldn’t sit back. he puts you back on track, yet no one told you sparks would fly; and the crazy fact that it’s inevitable

heartbeat by @xbaepsae s a ft myg unrequited love (24.9k)

⋆ “You fell in love with a boy who was in love with music, and you weren’t sure if he was capable of loving you the same way. This thought should’ve caused you to move away from him; but, if anything, it just drew you closer.“

one year, my love by @hayjeon f s a historical/royal au 100 days my prince kdrama (31k)

⋆ You forge a marriage contract with the strangely speaking man who suddenly stumbled into your town with memory loss, but little do you know that he’s actually the lost Crown Prince, and a lot can happen between a married man and woman in one year. 

the love prognosis by @awrkive f s a medical au roommates f2l (90.7k)

⋆ for as long as you can remember, you've always been a hopeless romantic. the girl who’s always dreamt of cheesy encounters with her soulmate, grand love declarations, and a cute little beach wedding to boot. but reality pretty much slaps you hard right on the face, because love, unfortunately, doesn’t come grand — it’s simple and it’s quiet, but it is quite painful, especially when the love that you’ve been seeking for all your adult life has just been right under your nose all this time.

ever a never after by @yoonia s ft. ksj enchanted au (51.8+k)

⋆ Some say fate can be a cruel thing. Yet you never knew how true it was until fate played a hand in your bad luck. Merely moments before your happily ever after, you are suddenly sent out to a weird place. A different world. You wonder if this is a test from fate to see if you are truly deserving of your happy ending, or if perhaps fate wants to show you something else. Something that fate wishes you to learn before you can finally move on to take the next step towards your happiness.

between takes by @jeonstudios f s a fluffer au porn star au (74.6k)

⋆ as a fluffer for a popular porn star, your focus is to keep him hard and performing on set. turns out he's not the only thing that's hard

Shatter With Me by @colormepurplex2 f s a surrogate au best friends husband (46.4k)

⋆ Your best friend, Jiyoon, and her husband, Jungkook, have faced years of hardship trying to start a family. In a last-ditch effort to have their dream life, they seek solace in surrogacy. Wanting to see your best friend smile, you offer to become the bright beacon at the end of the tunnel, giving them what they have always wanted. But what happens when you begin to shine your light on their darkness? Things aren’t always as they seem—happiness can be a façade, shattering under the lightest pressure.

Chasing Cars by @oddinary4bts f s a college au brother best friend forbidden love (218.5k)

⋆ when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?

hold me close by @ahundredtimesover f s a brother best friend (41.8k)

⋆ When you're asked to look after your parents' house and meet them before they go on vacation, you, Jimin, and Jungkook take the trip to your hometown of Busan and relive memories of your youth. While your new relationship has you feeling like a lovesick teenager with all the affection that Jungkook shows you, you're still you - a professional trying to make it in the corporate world, and an eldest child trying not to disappoint her parents. And that turns out to be your undoing, as a little blunder causes a rift between you and Jungkook, resulting in a trip that you might as well have messed up… Not if your brother can help it, though

sugar high by @yeojaa f a idol au childhood best friends unrequited love (33.3k)

⋆ You thought you’d known real love and maybe you had - it just wasn’t with who you thought.

the law of attraction by @jexnkookie f s a lawyer jk girl of his dreams (26.9k)

⋆ Throughout his life, Jung Kook has only ever loved one girl. Despite her being out of his league and of an elite class that he wasn't born into, he fell hard, keeping his feelings a closely guarded secret. When they parted ways, and Jung Kook pursued his law career, he did so with the intent of moving on. But when she unexpectedly arrives back into his life, Jung Kook finds himself once again face to face with his own insecurities, and the girl of his dreams.

love bug by @here4kpopfics f s a established relationship (30.4k)

⋆ A collection of stories and drabbles with my comfort couple Jungkook and Love Bug as I affectionally call her. They were my first couple to write in over a decade and I hold them very close to my heart.

sh by @wwilloww f s a ot7 f2l (118k)

⋆ Six months of quarantine have kept you apart. Somehow the distance sparks something new in each of you: questions, unfinished conversations, threads once chased now left cold. So when your roommate invites you to come with him to a mysterious house in the mountains with your friends, how could you even think of saying no?

bloodlines entwined by @spideyjimin f s a s2l soulmates werewolf au royalty au (30.8+)

⋆ having a baby alone was supposed to be easy. but an accidental twist of fate pulled you into a hidden world of werewolves, and ancient bloodlines. navigating your already complicated life becomes even harder as you uncover your past; one tied to a legacy you never knew existed. and in the middle of this chaos stands jungkook, the werewolf king… and the father of your child.  

jump then fall (into you) by @writtenwhalien f s a bf2l fake dating (52k)

⋆ bringing Jungkook along as your date to your ex’s lavish cruise wedding seemed like a perfect idea at first — all of your family and close friends together, nothing can go wrong… then Jungkook’s ex shows up and all of a sudden you’re in a years long relationship with him. You don’t mind though, really, how hard can sharing a cabin and pretending to be deeply in love with your best friend really be?

not in that way by @girlygguk f s a ft. myg unrequited love bf2l (30k)

⋆ in which you're hopelessly in love with your best friend, min yoongi. meanwhile, your other best friend, jeon jungkook, is hopelessly in love with you.

live through this by @starshapedkookie f s a band au exes to frenemies to lovers (46.5k)

⋆ A record deal. The one thing Violet needed to become the next big rockstars. As the front-woman to the band, life couldn’t have been any easier for you. That is until a devastating life event changes everything for you, leaving you heartbroken and in a downward spiral you can’t get out of. With your biggest competitor, Whailen 52 on your heels, your bandmates worried about the future, and your ex Jeon Jungkook being your only solace; you weren’t sure if you were going to live through this to see your dreams come to fruition.

a story that we paint by @thedefinitionofbts f a ft.kth college au scifi au (25k)

⋆ in which the lines between virtual and reality are blurred.

crimson park by heartbeatan f s a e2l crime au(159.6k)

angel in the darkness by @icyhobi s a mafia au prostitution au

⋆ after a patient urgently pleads you to go and help a friend of his, you naively agree to it. little did you know, that you would get more than what you agreed to, when he leads you to a brothel, to help a dangerous prostitute named jeon jungkook.

one night stand by @buryhny f s a ceo au e2l (382k)

⋆ as if the unexpected twist of a one-night stand turning out to be your CEO boss wasn't surreal enough, the situation takes a more challenging turn when both of you discover that you're expecting his child.

the alpha omega series by @borathae f s a childhood best friends to enemies to lovers werewolf au (40.8k)

⋆ Jungkook is the son of the pack Alpha and therefore heir of the titel. You are an omega and utterly out of his league. This is the story of how, against all odds, you and he became true mates.

4-7-8 by @jiminrings a marriage au (73k+)

⋆ you’re secure when it comes to loving jungkook, knowing that your husband loves you beyond words. what you aren’t so secure about is his first love — someone who isn’t you. alternatively, jungkook’s married to you, but he still celebrates his anniversary with his ex out of sentimentality.

netflix & chill by @1kook f s blindate collge au (113.7+)

 ⋆ If you planned things right, you could rain down your raging displeasure on Jeon Jungkook right after the meal but before this proposed ‘Netflix and chilling,’ maybe dramatically throw your glass of wine at him, before storming out of his place and reporting him to the authorities (Namjoon) for his douchebag personality.

the bad blind date by ravsisrekt f s a idol au f2l (wattpad)

⋆ Being set up on a date is hard as it is. But being set up on a date where the boy you're with loves your best friend is even harder-and trust me, being bubbly, cute, and incredibly hilarious doesn't work on him either…but on the other members it certainly does.

sns by narcotichobi f s a idol au s2l (wattpad)

⋆ Jae is a twenty-one year old Korean-American university student whose life is just ordinary. Struggling through the confines of cultural differences between her lifestyle and ethnicity, Jae finds herself through social media outlets and the integration of k-pop into her American life. Jungkook is a twenty year old singer, dancer and producer of the Korean-Pop idol group, BTS (방탄소년단). He works over twelve hours a day and has almost every second of his life circulating around social media. Jungkook, with newly found dating privileges, is slow to trust another person with his personal life and thoughts. Follow Jae and Jungkook through a love-story heavily motivated by social media and press

40 weeks by magicalmochii f s a teeange pregnancy f2l (wattpad)

⋆ They didn't want to be virgins when they graduated. Two friends agree to let go of their innocence together, no strings attached. Life had other plans.

unconditionally by magicalmochii f s a parents au (wattpad) sequel to 40 weeks

⋆ They survived high school and overcame the obstacles that tried to break them apart. Together they adapt to college life and work, all while caring for their new baby. Now, two friends turned lovers prepare for their wedding. Life had other plans. The continuation of 40 Weeks. Bring tissues.

blood ink by pocketbangtan f s a gang au tattoo artist jk (wattpad)

⋆ "That's my tattoo, Y/N, on your body. You know exactly what that means."

one shot

wait for your love by @/spideyjimin f s a exes2lovers parents (17.3k)

⋆ sixteen years ago, your life was turned upside down when you surrendered to the temptation — none other than jungkook, the star basketball player on your school’s team. today, after all that time, you reunite under tragic circumstances; a car crash where he saves your life.

Inkling by @gguksgalaxy s a f2l tattoo artist jk (17.7k)

⋆Jungkook is your brother’s boyfriend’s co-worker, they own a tattoo and piercing parlour. In other words, he’s tall, gorgeous, has his passion literally etched into his skin, looks incredibly good in a man-bun, and is semi-unattainable for you. Why? Well…you’re not entirely sure but him ditching right after a very heated make-out session sure isn’t a good sign. His extremely poor mood the next week sure isn’t either, but the only way to fix it is to face the beast head-on. Right?

in this paradise by @ressjeon f s a s2l survivor au (16.3k)

⋆ in an attempt to escape what’s been planned for him, Jungkook hopped on a ship only to face a tragedy that he didn’t expect and then there’s you who somehow couldn’t believe to find company in this isolated land. was this fate or was this just a temporary chance of bliss as a challenge for you both?

sleepover by @personasintro f s best friends brother (10.4k)

⋆ Jungkook is your best friend’s little brother who invites you to have a sleepover at his place. Nothing can happen, right?

bottle up old love by @wintaerbaer f s a exes to lovers (4.6k)

⋆ Jungkook may have broken up with you a year ago, but that's not going to stop him from coming to your rescue when he sees you being cornered by a creep.

the devil’s change up by @/jungblue f s a coach au (41.3k)

⋆ Majoring in athletic training means you have mandatory observation hours to perform with every single sports team at your school throughout the year, and so far it’s been going pretty great. However, when regrets from your past cause your rotation with the baseball team to become a little rocky, there’s one star pitcher who says that he can make it all better. 

entertainer by @taegularities f s a s2l (32.4k)

⋆ Growing singer Jeon Jungkook is as charismatic as he is self-absored – that is, until he meets you. Caught in a web of secrets, he finds a riddle in you he urges to solve; even ready to turn the spotlight towards you until nothing remains… but regret.

habits of a clandestine nature by @alphabetboyluvr s a college au rich jk e2l (16k)

explorer by @/1kook f s alien au s2f2l (17.8k)

⋆ Jungkook does not want to impress the frankly tyrannical ways of his planet on you. He just wants to stay here and keep your couch warm for you, hold your hair back when you wash your face in the morning. 

million dollar darling by @kooktrash f s a e2f2l crazy rixh asians inspired (19.7k)

⋆ jeon jungkook is well aware of how privileged he is to have been born into the life he was given. it was glamorous and influential yet close-knit and suffocating, something he thought he wanted to escape from. a trip back home to the circle of wealth and snottiness for his best friend’s million dollar wedding has reminded him of all the reasons why he wanted to leave in the first place… and all the reasons he should stay — the main one being you, the spoiled rich girl he knew was utterly perfect for him.

little surfer girl by @ppersonna f s a summer love suferjk (9.8k)

⋆ every summer you watched jeon jungkook turn into a perfect, professional surfer. every summer, you wanted him more. this summer, you were determined to make him yours.

the whole of your heart by @lcksndkys f s a husband au band au (8k)

⋆ Save a drum, bang a drummer.

sketch by @moonscriptsx f s soulmate au artist jk (9.6k)

⋆ After sixteen years of dreaming about the same unknown beautiful girl, Jungkook finally gets to put a name to the face — and she's so much more than what he's dreamt of

strings attached (to my heart) by @jungkoode f s spiderkook college au (11.8k)

⋆ You were a journalist at Yonsei University when you started noticing the strange coincidences between your favorite bumbling freshman and Seoul's newest superhero. The way Spider-Man's voice cracks on 'noona' exactly like Jungkook's does. The way they both bring you the same snacks, have the same nervous energy, the same tendency to ramble when flustered. You tell yourself it's just a coincidence, because the alternative means admitting something you're absolutely not ready to deal with.

it was always you by @/hueseok f s a childhood best friends to lovers (13.2k)

⋆ for as long as you remember, you’ve always had the fattest crush on your childhood friend, jeon jungkook. it never blossomed into something more though, because that’s what happens when life naturally takes it course—you grow up, you move on, and you pretend that those feelings never existed in order to maintain the good friendship that remained between the two of you over the years.so when he visits you after work one day, asking you to marry him, you do everything you can to refuse, because the reason he’s asking you isn’t due to the fact that he finally realized that he loved you after all this time, but because he thinks he’s doing you a big favor.or at least, that’s what you think.

mio angelo by @/hueseok f s a mafia au established relationship (33.3k)

⋆ it’s no secret to the whole nation how powerful the jeon family was. the efforts of the highly respected don jungsoo was the reason why the name of their clan continues to be a name that people thought greatly of and sometimes even feared. despite your father working alongside with the don, you never truly understood what the family possessed to earn them such acclaim; that is until you got closer to one of his grandsons, jeon jeongguk, that you caught a glimpse of how much power they truly seized as you see it first hand and become a part of it yourself. inspired by the godfather and vincenzo

ultimatum by @parkmuse f s spiderkook (10.3k)

⋆ Your pervy, idiotic boyfriend just so happens to also be your friendly neighborhood Spider-man (in bed).

melomaniac by @jungkxook f s a band au f2l (13k)

⋆ you’re wholeheartedly, madly in love with jungkook and yet you shouldn’t be because he’s supposed to be your best friend and nothing more. worst part of it all is that you know he’s in love with you too.

Navigating Tides by @jjungkookislife f s a exes2lovers (18.9k)

⋆ A cruise is the last place you expect to see your ex-boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook. You broke up six months ago, and your best friends Jimin and Yoongi assured you your ex wouldn't even remember this cruise that you booked a year in advance. However, on your first night on board, you discover your ex isn't only on the cruise ship, but there are no rooms available for him to stay in other than yours.

will it fit? by @jeonsweetpea f s idiots2lovers roommate au (6.7K)

⋆ So what if your roommate caught you masturbating? At least he forgot about it the next day. But he can’t exactly forget the big dildo you left in your shared bathroom…

pull me down by @starryeyedkoo f a badboy gang college au (22.9k)

⋆ “Do you regret it?” “What?” “Falling in love with me? It feels like I only weigh you down.” “I’ll let you pull me down to the depths of hell if that’s what it means to love you.”

espresso by @joonberriess f s a boxer jk idol oc (14.6k)

⋆ a rowdy boxer and the pretty it-girl he bagged by being him. jungkook’s doing anything to prove he’s serious, even if it means making a fool outta himself.

changes in between by @/taegularities f s a roommates s2f2l (24.7k)

⋆ Becoming the roommate of Jeon Jungkook is the biggest change you’ve ever gotten thrown into - but little do you know that the addition of another man will bring even further turbulence into your (love) life.

not my fault by @/taegularities f s college au classmates 2 lovers (12.6k)

⋆ After sparking a sinful conversation on a dating app, you vow to yourself that you won’t give in to more the notorious college fuckboy Jeon Jungkook might have to offer. That is, until he rings your doorbell just one night later – and it’s truly not your fault that he’s so damn hard to resist.

the secret beneath our stars by @subvk s a college au f2l (13.1k)

⋆ Falling in love with Jeon Jungkook was everything you’ve ever dreamed of and more, but maybe it was exactly that: a dream so blissful and comforting that it was too good to be true, something that could all disappear when the night changes to day, and your eyes open again. Or, making a marriage pact with your best friend was supposed to instill a sense of hope for you, so why does this hurt you more than it should?

mature by @/jiminrings f a pining f2l (8k)

⋆ alternatively, crushing on jungkook who's in your friend group is, has, and will never be a good idea.

movie goers by @mi55delulu f s a e2f2l (16.4k)

⋆ starting off on the wrong foot with your new neighbor was not on the top of your bucket list, yet you’ve made an enemy of jeon jungkook in less than 24 hours. unlucky for you, he’s not backing down either.

hopless hearts by @cupofteaguk f idol au s2l (17k)

⋆ you never understood the gravity of your position as an intern working Kcon until you fall for one of your favorite idols, Jeon Jungkook—quite literally too.

dissonance by @/yuzukult f s a rockstar jk student oc (19.4k)

⋆ something that first seems out of reach becomes a reality for him. screaming adoring fans, billboards with him and his band plastered on it, and touring across the globe with venues sold out. he has everything… but all he’s missing is you.

this is how we break by @ahundredtimesover f s a exes au (20.6k)

⋆ There are things you prepared for coming back home and that includes seeing your ex-boyfriend, but helping him design his apartment isn’t one of them. From meetings over coffee and lunches with your friends, you both learn more about the time in-between, and what you find out leave you heartbroken, wondering if there’s enough of you left to try to get back what you’d lost.

↬looking for other jjk fics or the other members check out my library

[cuteandhughesy]

Oh Boy! | Jeremy Swayman

summary: going into labour during a hockey game was definitely not in your and jeremy’s itinerary—but you aren’t about to let that stop you from having this damn baby with your boyfriend at your side.

2.0k

warnings: SFW! pre-established relationship | pregnancy | mentions of labour and childbirth | suggestive dialogue and scenes | read at your own discretion

a/n: based loosely off this request! I changed it a little bit for the story to flow the way I seemed fit—so I hope you love it ✨ the valentines fic will be a one night stand (sorta ;) moment with vince dunn…so get ready.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

you shouldn't of acted so naive. at 37 and a half weeks pregnant, you were in the early stages of labour—and you have been since 2 a.m. it started as the dullest pain, one that was easily brushed off as an awkward sleeping position and a little bit of gas, but as the early morning came, it progressed into a proper pull—like the sensation of a period cramp.

you ignored it, hiding the sensation that came in waves every hour or two with a smile on your face, letting your boyfriend cook you breakfast (pancakes because for your entire pregnancy the thought of anything else made you queasy), and make your favourite decaf ice coffee.

as the evening came closer, jeremey waking from his pre-game nap to begin getting ready—a part of you knew that you were in labour. but another part of your brain was in denial. you're not due yet, the baby clothes haven't even been put away, your parents are still a state over. that's the part of your brain that had you pushing everything away. you were just a little uncomfortable. everything is fine—you're not in labour yet.

your boyfriend stumbles down the hallway, tie hung loose around his neck as he rubs sleep from his eye. your eyes shift to clock above the tv, it's almost 5 p.m. meaning he’s just getting ready to head out to TD garden.

jeremy leans over the back of the couch, hands on either side of your shoulders as he kisses your head. "hey baby."

you hum just as a sharp pain shoots across your impossibly large belly, and you wince. jeremy pauses, rounding the couch until he standing in front of you. "what's wrong?"

you smile, although it's not as wide or bright as your usual one. "nothing." you don't give jermey a chance to question you further, holding out your hands so he can help you off the couch. "just sitting on my foot funny is all."

he doesn't look all too convinced, but thankfully he doesn't interrogate you like he's desperate to do—pulling you off the couch like the 20 pounds on your belly is nothing to him, like you're still only 10 pounds or something. which is nice, because your boyfriend can still make you feel dainty. you love him so much.

at this stage in your pregnancy, jeremy knows better than to question you, especially when you're insisting that everything is fine. so he stays as quiet as he can manage—unless he wants his balls ripped clean off.

once you're standing, jeremy sends you a soft smile. "okay baby, if you're sure." he says quietly, hands resting on the sides of your belly as he leans down and gives you a gentle, sincere kiss. it has your belly swooping pleasantly for the first time today, making you sigh against your boyfriends mouth like it's the first time you’ve been kissed. your heart rate increases even more than usual as jeremy’s thumbs swipe alone your squished ribs, and you feel like you’re on cloud 9.

it seems that the baby agrees, tiny body rolling around in your belly like it's a ride—but soon enough there's a hard kick against your side, followed by another wave of pinching pain. you pull away from the kiss, brows pulling in discomfort.

you don’t want jeremy to ask again, or worry. so you mask the pain by fiddling with jeremy's tie, looping it around itself. "you look handsome in this colour."

jeremy's brows pull questionably, analyzing your seemingly calm face. he sighs gently, just as your nimble fingers finish with his now perfectly knotted tie. "thanks."

another sharp pain shoots across your lower belly, wrapping around your back and shooting down to your pelvis. now you're getting worried—what if something is wrong? what if you're actually in labour? but once again, you're doubting yourself. maybe you're just overreacting. the last thing you want is to pull jeremy from a game because of braxton hicks contractions.

you already feel guilty about having being pregnant during the height of the nhl season—never mind when the baby actually gets here and jeremy is up with you all hours of the night. the least you can do right now is let him play in peace.

it's a few more minutes before your boyfriend is slipping into his dress shoes, kissing your lips once more by the front door before heading to the rink—leaving you and your reeling mind behind.

anxiously, you pace around the house in any attempt to be busy and distract yourself. you put away these few dishes left in the drying rack from breakfast, set jeremy's laundry going, and you even double check the hospital bag—just in case.

your pain is getting increasingly worse, and the contractions you've been experiencing since the early morning are now only 7 minutes apart. it was undeniable now, you're most definitely in labour.

before you totally panic, you send a rather frantic text to danielle coyle, listing your symptoms and contractions times. her response was simple: get to the damn hospital baby mama.

you're going to have a baby. today. suddenly you don’t feel prepared, or ready to have a baby in the house. you’re scared. immediately you start crying, hands shaking and tears blurring your vision as you attempt to look down at your phone screen—danielle’s message starting back at you…taunting you.

your knees feel weak, and it has you pushing yourself to walk over to your exercise ball, sitting down to relive some of the pressure on not only your knees, but pelvis and back as well. you wipe your tear filled eyes, pulling up jermey's contact and hitting the call button before you pass out from anxiety.

unfortunately you're not one of those wags who wants their boyfriend to stay blissfully unaware of labour—as much as you wish you were. you are scared, and in pain, and you need him. now. it could be game 7 of the playoffs and you’d still want jeremy with you.

he picks up on the first ring—he must have his phone connected to his bluetooth today. "what's wrong?" jeremy questions, and you can practically hear the way his face is scrunched in concern. the sound of his car can be heard in the background of the call, meaning he hasn't gotten to the arena yet. thank god.

"jer..." you sniffle, a loud sob wracking through your body. "I-I think-the baby's coming."

despite your wobbly words and borderline hyperventilating, jeremy knows exactly what you’re saying. his breath hitches, and immediately he’s pulling off the road and into some bank parking lot. "I knew something was wrong, honey. are you okay?" jeremy flicks his turn signal on before pulling back out onto the road, back in the direction of home—of you.

"I just want you home." you admit timidly, voice laced with emotion and fear. "i'm sorry that i'm only just telling you...I didn't know what to do."

jeremy sighs, naturally picking up speed until he's borderline breaking the law. "don't apologize, okay. i'll be there soon."

"wait," you cry, hips swivelling on the ball as your pelvis tightens uncomfortably. "please don't hang up."

jeremy's lips pull down at the sheer panic in your voice. he almost feels guilty for biting his tongue today, especially when he saw how much pain you’ve been in since you brushed your teeth together this morning. regardless, he’s happy you’re calling him now rather than after you’re already starting to push. "baby, i've gotta call work. but I promise i'll be home very soon, and if i'm done the call before I get there, i'll call you back."

after a a tiny and sad okay from you, he hangs up, instantly dialing his coach's number. thankfully, joe sacco picks up on the second ring, "jeremy? everything okay?"

"actually joe," he starts, an inevitable smile growing on his face. "y/n is in labour."

much to your relief, jeremy is walking back through the front door only 8 minutes after your phone call ended—slightly breathless and eyes wide—but he’s here. jeremy’s eyes land upon you, still rolling your hips on the hot pink exercise ball, breathing deeply through contractions.

you had just stopped crying, but as soon as jeremy looks at you, the tears start up again. he rushes towards you, holding your face delicately. "hey....hey what's wrong? why are you crying?"

you look like a wreck. hair still not brushed, snot running out of your nose like a faucet while tears stream down your cheeks—not yet out of your pyjamas because for the past month, just getting out of bed was a chore, never mind having to dress the huge stomach attached to you. stupid athletes and their giant babies.

"i'm scared." you tell him, your own hands wrapping around jeremy's wrists to keep him close to you. "ugh! having a baby is scary, jer!"

"it's going to be okay." he chuckles quietly, bringing you into his chest for a hug. and you go easily, falling into the comfort of jeremy's hug while your muscles contract tightly, making your face pull inward, forming a scowl. "you're doing so good already." he praises, words tickling your hairline.

you whine in discomfort, and like he learned in labour&delivery classes, jeremy starts pushing against your hips, reliving some of the pain and pressure on your pelvis. you exhale shakily, eyes flickering up to your boyfriends warm gaze.

there's a small smile on his face despite the nerves he feels in his stomach, because despite all the anxiety and unknown thoughts about having a baby, there’s the upmost excitement about becoming parents that jeremy just can’t not smile about. your eyes say what your mouth can't, a conversation shared just between your and jeremy's locked gazes. it's time.

"you ready to have our baby?"

soon enough your both in the car, hospital bags packed in the back seat and jeremy's hand on your thigh, stroking your skin over your sleep wear as you breathe through intense contractions and pressure.

you're pretty sure the hockey channel is playing through the radio—you can take the man out of the game. the broadcasters begin taking about the absence of the usual bruins goaltender, speculating about his sudden absence, and that's when you reach over and turn it off. the last thing you need is to feel more guilt about having a hockey season baby.

and as if jeremy can sense that, he squeezes your leg and shoots you a look. "there's nowhere i'd rather be right now, baby. okay? we're almost there."

"okay." you breathe, your hand finding his and interlocking your fingers together. "love you."

"love you."

you're quickly ushered into a private room once you check in at the hospital, nurses fussing and checking you over—hooking you up to various machines and getting the room ready for a delivery.

you're 8 centimetres dilated, which isn't surprising considering how long you've been labouring—almost 16 hours now. jeremy is truly your rock through the entire thing, and when it's time to start pushing, he's in full support mode. kissing your head, whispering words of encouragement and holding your leg up while you cry and scream, delivering your baby like it's second nature—which technically, it is.

after exactly 42 minutes of pushing, you give birth to your and jeremy's baby boy. you'll never forgot the way having your new baby placed on your chest feels, and the love that consumed you looking into his brown eyes…the same eyes as jeremy. it was other worldy.

jeremy's eyes watered at the sight, kissing both you and his son in the softest, most precious way. he’s never felt more complete—more hole—than looking at the sight of your baby in your arms. shaky arms covered in various patches and IVs.

you know the next little while will be a great learning curve. between adding a baby into the mix, the hockey schedule and the half painted nursery back at home, adjusting to your new life will surely be a little difficult to get used to.

but you're so damn excited to learn, and even more so that jeremy will be learning with you.

yourusername is with jeremyswayman1

liked by daniellegcoyle, bmarch63 and others

yourusername he’s here 🩵

[7-deadly-cats]

killing me softly (part two)

kms masterlist | <- part one | part three (soon) ->

pairing: rafe cameron x fem!introverted!kook!reader

cw: swearing, y/n being an awkward mess, subtle and indirect mention of sexual themes

synopsys: it's the last year of high school and y/n is paired up with rafe cameron for a 2 week long project in art class. this wouldn't be a problem if y/n wasn't awkward as hell and well ... if there wasn't her big fat crush on him. could this be the beginning of a friendship or maybe even more? one thing was certain: rafe cameron's intense, impulsive, and complex in ways that weren't always for the better, and y/n's mind? that shit was even more tangled. but she hadn't spent seven years crushing on him from a distance just to let this chance slip through her fingers ... right?

summary of recent events: y/n and rafe were paired up for a 2 week-long art project. they agreed to meet during lunch break to start working on it. after y/n picked him up after PE, they headed for the school’s dining hall.

word count: 3.3k+

a/n: i don't have much to say for this one as it's just an immediate continuation of the last one but i'm very thankful for the likes and comments on the first part. i didn't expect any at all so a big thank you to everyone who decided to support <3 i hope you also enjoy this one as well :) (also super excited when i’ll get to future parts where y/n gets to be more silly :3)

Important: I started using dividers after chat convos that include more than one screenshot, so you guys know when to switch back to the written story. Yk you usually click on the image to get a full-screen mode to read the messages easier, so whenever the blue rectangle image pops up, you know when to back out. Makes it easier to avoid potential spoilers, hope that makes sense :P

The dining hall at Kildare Academy was moderately full. Most students’ classes were already over, and a lot of Kooks went to the restaurants down the street, even though the serving station offered fresh high-quality food.

Okay, fries weren’t exactly healthy but they probably made them from potatoes grown specifically for Kooks (yes, as a Kook yourself, you were their biggest hater).

Whatever. The dining hall wasn’t the reason your heart was about to explode in your chest.

No. You were having lunch.

With. Rafe. Cameron.

If someone had told you this morning, you would’ve laughed.

Because, hello??? Rafe had been your crush since you’d first set foot in Kildare Academy in fifth grade.

Okay, not exactly special—what Figure 8 girl hadn’t had a crush on Rafe at some point?

But that wasn’t the point. This whole ... thing just felt so surreal.

A crush had always been just that—a crush. You weren’t the type to walk up to a guy and say, Hey, you’re cute, let’s go on a date. That would mean putting yourself out there and making yourself vulnerable.

And the last thing you ever wanted was to be seen.

Not in a physical way. That was unavoidable. No, what scared you was someone actually seeing you, the parts of yourself you kept locked away.

Ew, that sounded so fucking dramatic.

So while your 11-year-old self was doing backflips of joy, your 18-year-old self was having a full-blown existential crisis.

Okay, maybe not that bad.

“You were right,” Rafe said, pulling you from your thoughts. He was sitting across from you, pushing his fork through his quinoa-veggie bowl.

You eyed him confused. ���About what?”

Rafe nodded toward your fries, the corner of his lips tugging into a subtle smile. “I am a fries guy. Quinoa tastes like shit and rocks.”

You glanced at his bowl before meeting his gaze again, a knowing smile on your face. “I guess it’s the color. Red and black ones are usually more bitter and more firm than their white counterparts.”

Rafe raised a brow, amused. “As a quinoa expert, you could’ve warned me.”

Your cheeks heated. You kind of had, with that dumb joke outside the gym earlier. “I thought you already knew what it tasted like.”

“I do,” he shrugged, taking a bite of his bowl anyway. “Maybe I just didn’t want you to label me as the fries guy.”

Wait—was that a joke? And why did he care what you thought about him?

God, I suck at whatever this is.

So you just forced a chuckle and took a sip of your water.

…

…

...

Shit.

Now there was that awkward silence you always dreaded in conversations.

Okay, okay, stay calm.

Should I say something? Should I offer him my fries?

You almost laughed. Hell no, that’d be so weird. Plus the quinoa part of his bowl didn’t even take up a third of the whole meal.

You wished Cara were here. She’d know exactly what to say and how to act. She went on dates all the time, made out with guys at parties just for fun, and could hold a normal fucking conversation with a guy she was interested in.

“So, you like… a real artist or something?” Rafe asked absentmindedly, breaking the unbearable silence. “Since you picked Art as an elective?”

You looked up, quickly swallowing the bite of fries in your mouth before giving him a nervous smile. “Yeah, I mean—no, I wouldn’t call myself a real artist, not like Da Vinci or such.” You let out an awkward laugh. “I just draw sometimes when I’m bored.”

Jesus Christ, did he have to look at you like that? His blue eyes were drilling into your entire existence.

Rafe nodded. “Digital or traditional?”

You blinked at him, stunned.

How the fuck did Frat Boy Rafe Cameron know the difference between digital and traditional art?

Your expression made him smirk. And as if he had read your thoughts, he said, “My little sister Wheezie draws random shit on her iPad all the time.” He shrugged. “I don’t know, figured it was a thing—”

“No, I mean—yes, totally,” you blurted, immediately turning red because you just cut him off. “Most people start with pencil and paper but drawing on a tablet or iPad is just as legit. Um… so, yeah … I do both, to answer your question.” You smiled awkwardly.

Help, he would’ve had a more entertaining conversation with a rock.

Rafe barely raised a brow, a lazy smile on his lips. “It’s cool that you draw. Guess I got lucky having you as my partner for this project.”

WHAT.

Okay, everything’s chill.

NO, NOTHING WAS CHILL.

Is he flirting with me??? Is he just being nice ??? WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS MEAN.

What were you even supposed to reply to that?

Hahaha, thanks, did you know I made our Sims get married in eighth grade? Topper was your best man by the way.

WHAT THE FUCK, NO, STOP.

Whatever, just say something. Anything.

“Thanks,” you mumbled with an embarrassed smile, eyes fixed on your fries and salad.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Rafe lean back, pushing his half-eaten bowl aside. He shrugged. “Only sucks for you. Art’s not really my thing.”

No shit.

Also, what was that supposed to mean? Was he fishing for a compliment? Like Aww, no, come on, I’m sure you’re great at it.

Holy shit. Was Rafe Cameron secretly a pick-me guy? Were all these years crushing on him wasted?

“Yeah, I figured. Most people just take art class thinking it’ll be an easy A”, you said before he could say more and give you the ick.

OH my god, take it back, take it back—

When you saw his expression, you wanted to crawl into a hole and never come back. He looked… surprised? Confused? Maybe a little offended…?

Then the tension in his face eased. His lips twitched slightly before curving into a lopsided grin, making him look unexpectedly boyish.

“Shit, yeah. Guess that makes me ‘most people’”, he said with such ease, it was like you hadn’t just called him out.

How the hell did he manage to turn all your miserable attempts at a normal conversation into something so smooth? If you were in his place, you would've already walked out and dropped art class.

Yo, Mr Smith, this chick you paired me up with, she’s got the social skills of a dead fish.

This was so frustrating. It wasn’t like you were socially incompetent—not really—but around him, your brain just seemed to completely shut down.

“That’s not what I meant,” you said, furrowing your brows, annoyed at your own nervousness.

“Nah, it’s true,” Rafe replied, shrugging. Then he looked at you, a teasing edge in his voice. “So, if your art grade tanks, you know who to blame.”

Okayyy, he was either trying to get on your good side or looking for a smooth way out of this project—and you weren’t sure which was worse.

You swallowed your last fry and gave a chuckle. I sound like a fake ass bitch. “I’m sure you'll manage. Art is not about drawing perfectly — it’s more about the ideas and how you approach them.”

Jesus, you sounded just like Mr. Smith.

Rafe’s lips twitched into a cocky smirk. “Alright, then I guess you’ll have to help me be more creative.”

...

HUH?

OKAY. I MEAN SURE.

Be for fucking real, did he even realize what his words did to you?

Of course, he did—he probably flirted with girls daily. Or was he just lucky to be born with full charisma stats?

Probably both.

God, this was so embarrassing. Your face probably screamed HI CAN YOU MARRY ME, and to him, you were just some random Kook girl he was stuck with for a boring art project.

Okay, wait no.

Now YOU sounded like a pick-me.

“Yeah, we’ll see,” you said, cheeks pink, before clearing your throat to change the subject. “Okay, so… maybe we should start brainstorming some ideas? Like a mind map or mood board or something?”

Rafe leaned forward, crossing his arms on the table, and you had to fight the urge to glance at his biceps which flexed slightly as he moved. “Mood board? You talking about Pinterest type shit?”

Okay, wow, Rafe was absolutely not the type of guy you thought he was. Did he know about this stuff from Wheezie? Or some friends-with-benefits girlie?

Um, no, Y/N, none of your business.

You gave him a quick nod. “Yeah, something like that. We can also just start by writing stuff down.”

Rafe shrugged in agreement. “Okay.”

Okay.

He looked at you expectantly.

Ugh, did he really expect YOU to be the one taking notes?

Well, crush or not, he was still just a guy, after all.

You reached for the iPad in your bag, grabbed the Apple Pencil, and opened the Notes app.

As you scribbled down today’s date and gave the note a title, Rafe leaned in even closer, glancing at your screen. “Is this the iPad you use for drawing?”

He was so close now, his woody-aquatic aftershave filling your nose, giving you a strange feeling in your chest … and a very special part in your lower body.

“Yeah,” you replied shortly.

“Show me something then.”

“No.”

HUH?

“No?” Rafe’s gaze flicked from the screen to your flushed face, his lips curling into a crooked grin. There was a cocky glimmer in his gaze.

Good heavens, up close his eyes looked even more beautiful. They were the kind of blue people wrote bad poetry about. To you, they were a pretty contradiction—cold in color, warm in the way they lingered on your own eyes.

Heart racing, you looked away and laughed nervously. “I mean… maybe we should focus on the project first, you know, time pressure and all.”

With an amused scoff, Rafe leaned back again, glancing at his phone (wow, rude) for a second before saying, “To the boring part then."

Somehow it felt like you'd scratched his ego.

Girl, how could you mess up this badly? He probably thought you were some pretentious nerd now.

“So… do you have any ideas?” You twirled the Apple Pencil in your fingers, just praying for this painfully long lunch break to end.

Rafe pressed his lips together, scratching his jaw. The glass of his Rolex reflected a spectrum of lights under the ceiling’s lights. “Uh… dunno. What’s the prompt again? A modern take on the Greek gods?”

“A reinterpretation,” you corrected — then realizing you sounded like a know-it-all, so you quickly added, “but yeah, a modern version could definitely count.”

He nodded absentmindedly, fingers drumming on the table. “Okay, so…", he gave a dry laugh and ran a hand over his face. "Shit, what a stupid prompt."

You chewed the inner part of your cheeks. Okay, he clearly had zero interest in spending his free period working on some elective class’ project with you.

But it had been his idea to meet during lunch, you reminded yourself.

Forcing a smile, you offered, “We can always do this later. We still have two weeks.”

Rafe raised a brow. “You got plans or something?”

Oh. Guess that didn’t go over well.

You shook your head. “No, but if you’re not feeling it—”

“I’m not,” he cut in, his fingers stopping their steady rhythm against the table. “But we’re already here, so.”

That didn’t sound very motivated.

“Yeah, I guess”, you said, cringing at the sudden bitterness in your tone.

By the shift in Rafe’s expression, he must have noticed but before he had a chance to comment on it, you quickly picked up on what he’d said earlier. “So, a modern version of Olympus sounds fun. Maybe we can make it about the gods’ roles in today’s society or something like that.”

Rafe eyed you quietly, his expression impossible to read. He then tilted his head, scratching his nose. “Yeah, I guess. Maybe Zeus as the CEO of Olympus Industries or some shit. He’s the big boss, right? And everyone else just kinda works for him.”

Your lips curled into a soft smile. A corporate structure? Why were you not surprised.

“What?” He looked genuinely confused.

You shook your head, cheeks heating up again. “Nothing, that’s… that’s good.”

He raised his brows, a challenging tone in his voice. “You think it’s crap.”

“No,” you replied quickly, then adopted a more serious expression. “Really, it’s a nice take. Maybe his wife — Hera I mean — could be his girl boss PR manager, always cleaning up his scandals?”

A grin tugged at his lips, and with that, the weird tension in the air seemed to fade. “Shit, isn’t she also his sister? Well, yeah, guess she’s gotta cover up his dozen affairs. That guy’s a huge player.”

Okay, real talk—where did he get all this information from? He really didn’t seem like the guy to be interested in greek mythology.

It was cute though.

You couldn’t help but chuckle. “You seem to be an expert in this field.”

He scoffed amused, leaning back into his chair. His eyes mustered you with a strange mix of entertainment and irritation. “You think I'm a fuckboy or some shit?”

You furrowed your brows in confusion. Huh? What did he mean—

…

Did he-- ... OH SHIT.

A revolting feeling spread in your stomach and your cheeks probably invented a new shade of red.

WHY ON EARTH HAD YOU PHRASED IT LIKE THAT?!

Some evil gods or spirits must be messing with you right now because there was no way this situation could get any more awkward.

Frantically, you shook your head. “What? I… oh my god, no. NO! I was referring to the Greek gods. Not… you don’t give off such vibes. I mean, it’s none of my business anyway.”

Hey, if there’s a sniper out there, please take me out.

In your mind, you already estimated the cost of moving to another country. Canada had pretty landscapes and New Zealand--

A laugh escaped his lips — cocky, yet carrying a certain warmth. It made your heart stop and race at the same time.

“Relax,” he said bemused, leaning forward with his arms crossed, biceps flexing again. “People have said worse things to my face.”

No, this didn’t sit right with you.

You shook your head again, daring to meet his eyes. “No, I’m serious, I didn’t mean it like that. I was just … surprised about your knowledge of Greek mythology.” You froze, realizing this also sounded stupid. “Not that I took you for clueless…” Shit. You sighed. “It was stupid of me to phrase it like that and I don’t want you to think I take you for a fuckboy. It’s a shitty term anyway.”

Your nerves were going crazy and you fidgeted with the case of your iPad, waiting for his response.

Rafe silently STARING at you didn’t help at all. He seemed … surprised, maybe a little perplexed even.

SAY SOMETHING PLEASE.

“Alright”, he finally said, his usual cocky expression returning to his face. He slightly shifted in his seat, avoiding your gaze for just a second but long enough for you to notice. “Guess I picked up a bit from Wheezie when she had to do a presentation for school or whatever. She couldn't shut up about it. Shit was annoying as hell.”

For a moment, you didn't know what to respond. Why wasn't he offended? Why didn't he mock you for being so awkward?

You smiled, trying to relax your nerves. “Sounds like we could use her little expert knowledge on this project.”

Rafe gave a low chuckle. “Well, I believe we’ve already got a little expert right here”, he said with a crooked smile, his eyes burning a hole into your soul.

Oh. My. God.

The teasing edge in his voice made your brain shut down. This had to count as flirting, right? RIGHT?!

You chuckled nervously, cheeks a deep shade of red, and placed the Apple Pencil back on the screen. “Then I hope whatever I picked up from reading Percy Jackson will be enough.“

That's it, Y/N, you are officially banned from doing any more jokes.

-----------------------------------------------

In English class, you could finally breathe again.

Your suffering was over.

During the rest of the lunch break, Rafe and you had talked about some more ideas. Gladly, you hadn’t embarrassed yourself any further (if that was even possible because you’d definitely reached your peak today).

At the end of lunch, Topper had picked him up and they’d left for their own English class. Your goodbyes had been a little awkward but you’d managed.

Right now, you were grateful they didn’t attend the same class as you because you certainly didn’t want to listen to them laughing about what a weird ass person you were.

Okay, just breathe. I did it, it’s over.

You tried to concentrate on whatever Mrs. Andrade was talking about but only half the students truly paid attention.

Afternoons in the Outer Banks truly were a cruel thing.

So you decided to check your phone:

Sighing quietly, you put your phone away and rubbed your temples. A thousand thoughts raced through your mind, yet at the same time, it felt so empty.

Maybe I'm lucky and tomorrow I’ll wake up to a big newsflash: This just came in, Kildare Academy was reduced to ashes by a sudden fire.

But when had you ever been lucky?

Your phone buzzed again but you really didn’t feel like talking and thinking about Rafe anymore.

This guy had thrown you off track in just an hour but in the best and worst way possible.

And even though every part of you wanted to run from the thought of seeing him again — the way that uncomfortable feeling in your chest wouldn’t let up — there was still a small part of you that found yourself oddly eager to see him again, work with him on that stupid little project and listen to his stupid little laugh.

Because somehow in just sixty minutes you’d learned more about Rafe Cameron than you had in nearly seven years at Kildare Academy.

For instance, he was a lot kinder than you’d expected. Not that you’d ever thought he was like a high school movie bully or some shit but his occasional soft smiles and the way he didn't mock you when you'd said some stupid shit had definitely surprised you.

Plus he seemed to care about his little sister which was such an attractive attribute (and the bare minimum let's be honest).

All of this was so strange.

It sounded stupid but Rafe Cameron had always been just a concept to you. A crush you enjoyed looking at and maybe making up your own little idea of (and some scenarios to fall asleep to be for real).

But now he was... real and—

Bzzrt.

Seriously, Cara had class too—and with Ms. Langford, no less. And unlike Mrs. Andrade, she wasn’t exactly chill.

You picked up your phone again, expecting some delusional text messages—but the moment you saw the notification on your lock screen, your heart stopped.

No fucking way.

NO. FUCKING. WAY.

Holding your breath, you unlocked your phone, and the second your eyes landed on the profile picture, your heart took off in a full sprint. You didn’t even register Mrs. Andrade calling your name.

Because by some strange twist of fate, Rafe Cameron had gotten your number and decided to text you—after what you were sure had been your ultimate humiliation today.

You didn’t know whether to grin, cheer, or jump out of your seat—shit, maybe all three—but instead, you just sat there, wondering if there really was a god of luck and if he’d just decided to bless you.

-----------------------------------------------

kms masterlist | <- part one | part three (soon) ->

-----------------------------------------------

Taglist (open):

@ursogorgeous13 @my-name-is-baby @moneybaby07 @jjasmiineee

[potentpinion-blog]

From a purely personal, immediate perspective: agreed, I will feel little effect because I like weird little games made by solo developers more than games made by studios

I forgot to shut the fuck up so here's a cut

Also, with the way the industry is organized, it's not tenable for things to keep going this way. Every big project has to be THE game that captures tons of players and gets dlc/microtransaction money out the wazoo, because with those production values it's the only way to justify it. And the lifestyle games that become a hobby in themselves (mainly MMOS, gacha games, and pvp online stuff) do this best and monopolize player time enough to hurt every other release indirectly.

All that said: the people who will be hurt most by this are the devs, not the execs. I don't feel bad that the big game selection is about to dry up, but I do feel bad that "making a living making videogames" is gonna become even harder. Indie dev is awesome, but it is always a gamble on any project that can't be done in your spare time. The studio jobs have historically been very bad for mental health, and most are in the service of enriching corporations, but... idk it's hard not to feel bad on some level that a lot of specialized systems programmers, and level designers, and artists, and testers are just gonna be out on their asses. I really hope that a lot of them find a better use for their skills on the other side of the layoffs, because they deserve to be paid well to make games even if they can't make a whole game alone.

I guess I just wish that talented artists weren't beholden to the profits of large companies as much as they are. Until capitalism dies, the downturns of those companies are always going to hurt the workers most, and it sucks to watch.

video games will never "die" because it's a thing people will always make and we will always play. people like to play.

if the industry dies it's not really a loss.

[svetamillss]

Hiii I'm really sorry.. I’ve never really requested much on tumblr,so I apologize if I’m doing anything wrong. I wanted to ask if is it possible to write some platonic headcanons for some characters like(Hyun-jo,Semi,no-eul,Saebyeok)with a younger sister reader?like how would they act if they had a younger sister?it doesn't matter if it's in the games or outside.(also if you can't do it its completely okay,and I'm sorry for my bad English<33)

Headcanons: you are their younger sister🤍

Featuring: Cho Hyun Ju x Reader(f), Se Mi x Reader(f), Gang No Eul x Reader(f), Kang Sae Byeok x Reader(f)

Warnings: agnst, there is no love line here, it's not pairings!

A/N: Your order is very wonderful, thank you!! I hope I met your expectations!

🤍🤍🤍

Cho Hyun Ju

You and the girl were very close. You were the only one from her entourage who supported her when she admitted that she wanted to become a girl. You both left the family and started living together.

Unfortunately, you have collected a lot of debts because of Ju's operations and you didn't have enough money to live on at all. That's why you decided to agree to the offer to play games.

But the girl didn't know you were here and when she saw it, she was very angry with you. After all, you could have been in trouble (she just took care of you).

When you told her that you came here for her, she was so ashamed that she even cried and asked for forgiveness for you having such a worthless sister, you immediately began to calm her down and kiss her face (it was your way to calm each other down).

In the first game, you held on to your sister's back, also holding hands with her (so she understood that you were next to her).

You both voted for the cross, but it didn't help, and you continued to play. Hyun Ju didn't let you go for a minute, you slept together, you even went to the toilet together. When the guys wanted to meet you, she immediately started a serious conversation with them, making it clear that she would not allow it.

You both prayed to get out of here together and live happily again.

- It's because of me you're here, I'm a bad older sister that the younger one has to pull me out of the bottom. - Ju said when she stroked your hair before going to bed.

- You are the best and most beloved sister, I love you very much and we will get out of here and go to live in Thailand.

Se Mi

You and your sister have always been together. Consider that she raised you. You are very close, so you decided to go to the games to win more money.

Even though you realized that games are for survival, you continued to play, because you two were scared outside, and games are a chance for a normal existence.

Se Mi always protected you, helped you pass the games, because she was more courageous and strong.

The girl didn't let Thanos and Nam Gyu approach you, who wanted to get to know you better, but your sister made it clear that she was ready to kill for your safety.

After all, after the third game, you wanted to get home, so you voted for the cross, thinking that it would all be over soon.

- Don't worry, honey, tomorrow there will be a second vote and we will return home together. And now you have to hide well under the bed so that they don't find you. - she said when she led you away from everyone, to a safe place.

- And you? I don't want to hide without you! Don't leave!

- There is a place for one person, I found another safe place and will go there, but I will be next to you. Time will fly by and I'll be back soon. And now lie down and don't get out of hiding. - Finally, Se Mi kissed you on the forehead and helped you get under the bed, after which she left.

You prayed all nighttime that your sister would be fine. But, unfortunately, your prayers were in vain. When you finally managed to get out of the hiding, you immediately ran to look for your sister, but instead of your sweet and cheeky Se Mi, you saw only a body lying between the beds. Your sister had a cut throat.

All you could do was close her eyes, your face was wet with tears. Se Mi saved you, but she couldn't.

Gang No Eul

You and your older sister were able to get out of Hell. From The DPRK. But, unfortunately, she lose her husband and daughter.

You spent a lot of effort and money to find a little girl, but it was all in vain. Everyone said she was dead.

But the two of you didn't want to believe it and continued to fight. That's why you wanted to join the games to raise more money for the search. No Eul you didn't say that you decided on such a thing, because you knew that she would be against it, since the girl was strict with you, but so she showed her love and care for you.

You were scared at the games, so after the first game, you clicked on the cross, hoping to return home to your beloved sister with at least a small amount. But you didn't succeed. There were more people who wanted to continue and you had to continue.

You've always thought about No Eul. You cried at night, because you missed her very much and wanted her to hug you. You were afraid that you would die and never return to her again, and she would not even know where you disappeared.

But you didn't even suspect that your sister was very close to you. But on the other side of the game. She was one of the guards who shot the losing players. And when she saw you at the first game, she wanted to drop everything out of horror and run out to you, shout, and then save you from this horror.

But she couldn't. She was powerless. Therefore, she only had to hope that you were fine and alive. And she had a fear of being the one who would have to shoot you for losing the game.

Kang Sae Byeok

You, your older sister and younger brother were able to get out of the DPRK, but, unfortunately, since your brother was a minor, he was taken to an orphanage.

So you and Sae Byeok had to survive and earn money to take the boy from there.

You had enemies, a lot of debts, so the two of you decided to join the games to earn enough money and finally live a real life and family.

There were a lot of victims, but you stayed together. Your sister took great care of you, because you were much weaker than her. She didn't allow anyone to approach you, you were safe with her.

You both thought you'd get out of here soon. Together. But this game was too terrible and easily played on human trust.

When you were told to divide into teams of two people, you united with your sister without hesitation, thinking that you would manage.

But you didn't know that you had to play against each other.

Sae Byeok sat slooped almost the whole game, she blamed herself for everything, and you were thinking at that time, what to do. And you made a decision. You will save Sae Byeok, because she deserves to live more than you.

You decided to make the Marbles game for yourself. You offered to play in the following way: whoever throws the stone further, he will win. The girl agreed and threw quite far. And you didn't even try.

How many screams were there from your sister, you rarely saw her crying, but you understood that she was about to lose a loved one.

When you explained why you did it, she burst into tears even harder, and you just smiled, hugging her for the last time, and then gently pushed her to leave and not see you dying.

- Thank you for played with me! - those were your last words for her. The next moment there was a shot, and then the sound of a body falling to the ground. But Sae Byeok didn't turn around, knowing that you wouldn't want it. She left the room in tears.

But who knew that your victim would be in vain. After all, your sister was killed before the very last round, not keeping her promise to get out of here alive.

🤍🤍🤍

[juullllssss]

Knightorder 141 x f!reader Part 5

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

The Moment you got better Johnny was already on your side. He basically attached himself on your hip. His hand now stayed on you longer, sliding to your waist and up your back to your shoulders.

You always felt colder when his hands left you. Only a confusing other warm feeling was left behind. It left you puzzled what brought this change to him. A few days after the doctor declared you safe to go outside again, Johnny had giving you the promised scarf.

You wore the scarf proudly during tea in the garden. He was perfect, as if Johnny knew exactly what colors were your favorite. The wool was made into a elegant pattern, similar to your favorite dress. Thinking about how much time, work and consideration Johnny put into it leaves you with butterfly's in your stomach. You have to admit to yourself, you feel something for Johnny, and if you are even more honest probably for the others as well. All of them giving you something you never believed you deserved of a man. Not only were they all handsome even beautiful, with voices that made you nearly feral. Johnny with his ability to make you smile, cheering you up every time but also listening like he was happily absorbing everything you were willing to give him. Kyle with his presence alone that made you relax and feel safe, no matter how stressed you were. Sometimes bringing you little trinkets, just because he thought about you when he saw them. Simon who made you feel protected and weirdly seen. With his clear gaze seemingly following you everywhere. But he also shares things about himself that make you believe that he wants you to know him, too. And Price, he never outright said it but you just knew that he was their leader. His authoritarian aura giving him away. Every encounter with him leaving you weak in the knees. You were tempted to just let him take the lead, melting into his warm arms and letting yourself be guided.

Before your daydreams could get the best of you, you hear a small cough next to you.

Kyle is looking down at you, his brown eyes soft and with a small smile on his face. "I hope i am not disturbing you, my lady?"

You straighten your posture, a little flustered about your thoughts involving the person in front of you. "Of course not, please feel free."

As Kyle is sitting down, he puts a small tea tin on the table. Softly pushing it towards. "For you my lady, i believe you would like this flavor."

You lean forward you can not believe it, it is the flavor you were searching for all this time. Another lady had mentioned it at on of the many gatherings, boasting about how rare this specific flavor was. When you mention it to Kyle you could swear you saw a little smugness and something...darker pass in his eyes. But is gone to fast. "I am delighted that it makes you that happy, my lady. There will be a market tomorrow at the towns square, would you like to accompany us?" You light up at the prospect for a chance to leave the estate, the last time already being to long ago. "I would love to, but i don't know if my father would let me." Towards your concern Kyle smiles reassuring, "Do not worry, my lady. Price will get permission from your Father. As long you are fine with going with all of us?"

You could not wish for anything better, a chance to be alone with all of them, has god be a witness to your dreams? You readily agree. With a last big smile, Kyle leaves you to yourself again. You can not wait for tomorrow.

----

The Next day you are already up early. Your sister is on a visit to her fiancés estate, leaving you with the full attention of the men. The Sun is warm on your skin and immediately raises your mood even further. You don't remember when the last time was you were so happy. The Market is already full with people, some sellers are shouting to attract attention to their products others are simply walking around, much like your small group. The Men shielding you from the other passerby's. Kyle directs you to one of the many stalls. One with jewelry and other accessories. But even if you are impressed with all the handmade pieces it doesn't escape you how Johnny seems to slip away. Before you can think more about it, Kyle interrupts your thoughts, "How about this one lovely? It would match your eye Colour." It seems as if Kyle is hell bent on getting you something, when you try to refuse he smiles one of his gentle smiles. "Don't worry about it, is it wrong wanting to adorn my lady?" You have to admit the jewelry is beautiful and you were never strong against Kyles charming smile, that made him look even more handsome, if even possibly. In the mean time you try not to think about the way he so naturally grabs your hand, holding it while walking.

After a while you also notice Simon slipping away, this time you want to ask him about, but before you can say anything Price is at your side. Completely covering Simon from your sight. For a moment you pause, did he do this intentionally?

"My Lady, look over there, would you like some of these?" There are beautiful made scented candles, with some of them having an odor you have never smelled before. You try to catch a look into the direction Simon left, but with the broad chest of Price in the way you have no choice but to give up. This whole situation leaves a weird feeling in the back of your stomach.

Price and Kyle continue to show you different stalls around the market and you have to admit you kind of push down your weird feeling. With them both looking at you so softly and insisting to spoil you with everything you want. Completely making you forget the fact that Simon and Johnny keep slipping away during your visit to the town square.

It is already late when you get back to the estate, and for once you dismiss them, being really tired. That is when you hear it, two maid talking to each other. They did not notice you, and curiosity gets the best of you, keeping quit and listening in.

"Isn't weird? they are never with the second lady, always just with her. And he is always coming in and out of this room."

The other maid is nodding, "how did they he even get a office from the lord, they are not high born, didn't even deserve that much."

When you hear that, you are ready to come forward and rip into the maid, but the next sentence lets you stop yourself.

"But you are right they are always around our lady, just last time one of the butlers got intimated by one of them, poor men didn't even know what he did. The lord must be blind to let them behave like that, i don't know how they did it." They both sigh and start to make their way down the hallway, talking along the way. Leaving you wondering what you heard. What was said. And for once you don't give yourself the luxury to shrug their behavior of, thinking about past actions in a new light. Could their be something about their talk? What did they mean, the Men are always around you?

Leaving you here, in the middle of the night, in front of the office the maids mentioned. You sigh to yourself, you and your damn curiosity.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Disgraced Prince Hans of the Southern Isles x SleepingCursePrincess!Reader || Oneshot

*feat the Evil Queen, Ursula and Maleficent as 3 evil witches.

Plot: When Hans' true loves kiss actually breaks a curse. // Or // Imagine prince charming waking you up from your sleeping curse,, except YOUR prince charming is bound in cuffs and chains and a guards big strong hand on his shoulder when you wake.

Also, Hans is having recurring nightmares of being stalked by 3 long-dead fairytale witches (Well, 2 and a fairy) from somewhere very far away (Or very far below). That cant have anything to do with this sleeping curse can it?? 🤔

Warnings: Save for the cursing- nothing that's not already in Disney Movies. Unedited. Also may or may not make sense at all.

Tagging: @asperol-with-izzy , @disney-android-foundation , @lady-love88 , @marinerainbow , and @ryantryan6969 .

All the way back home, Hans was having dreams. Or nightmares. Nightmares of sharp nails scraping and grabbing him, eyes on him, and mysterious whispering voices. He'd wake up and he'd still be half back there, he would still hear their voices, even with the ship swaying and dipping under his body and dirty water trickling under the door into his cramped little cupboard-cabin. The long journey felt even longer with these dreams hanging over him; there being nothing else to occupy his mind except the humiliating near-miss Hans suffered in Arendelle.

Ugh.

He's new~ What's he in for, hmm?

You know I don't know that, sea witch. He's no use to us anyway.

Some powerful witch, you are. We can see him but we don't know anything.

-I don't see you doing anything, fairy.

No matter darlings~ He's cute. Much better then our old one-handed captain barnacle breath, hm?~

Don't get too excited, Ursula. He could be as boorish as Gaston.

Oh don't say that. What do you think, queenie?

Whatever.

The names swam around in his head like whatever beasts lived under the sea beneath the ship. Ursula, Gaston. But then there were more.

What are you hoping to find in these baby villains you keep watching, anyway, queenie?

I don't know. A necromancer, maybe. We need to get out of here, don't you agree?

We already had one of those, remember? That 'horned king' creature was no help to us.

I'm open to suggestions, fish. Well? Any ideas in that tiny pathetic goldfish brain?

Oh, certainly none for you~

Great. Get out, go harass Claude or something.

What the hell was a 'horned king'?? That wasn't something that Hans would imagine himself. He's never had an interest in dumb fairytales, magic was no use to him. Power was power, and that came from being in charge. Being King. But... the closer to land Hans got, the fainter the voices became. As if the ocean had a closer connection to the source, like a looking glass. And that, surely, was the work of magic wasn't it??

... -then it got worse.

I think you need to leave this one alone, Hildie. He's becoming aware, like Yzma.

She was crazy, Maleficent.

Still.

Maybe its a good thing if he knows we're watching. It has been a while since we had any quality entertainment...

... Oh, now now dear Hildie~ Don't short-change yourself; you make an excellent fool.

Just for that, I'm not going to tell you what I plan to do to him.

By the time the ship docked, the disgraced Prince was all-nerves. And not entirely about seeing his dumb older brothers again or the punishment they're bound to enjoy giving him. What were those nightmare-witches talking about? 'do to him'?

It never crossed his mind once that whatever that meant could hurt you.

~

When Hans left, you were perfectly fine. A little upset that he was leaving you, and you knew his plan to marry the Queen of Arendelle- but, mainly fine.

So why are you laying in your bed in the middle of the day, now? Why did you look... dead?

Hans found his voice for the first time since Arendelle, an accusatory tone lacing through his words, turning to look directly at the dignitary that lead him here to this room. He was loud and clear, as if he was still important here. "What happened to them?"

"I believe they were cursed, sir, while you were gone." When Hans eyes narrowed slowly, the little man sped on. "Your- your brothers do not wish for you to know ab- about this, but I believe it to be the only way to save the princess."

"... how do you mean? Talk faster, or I'll have your throat slit in an instant."

Surely the man knew that line was just an empty promise, because he clearly had no power anymore- he had bars wrapped around his wrists, a short chain between them, and a guard (Well-paid by the dignitary) glaring at his back. But the dignitary spoke faster anyway; a nervous man. "I- I believe a true loves kiss could wake her, sir! I believe that true love to be you!"

"True loves kiss?" Jesus christ, that pissed him off. If he never heard those words again it will be too fucking soon.

The man looks surprised, at this harsh reaction from the prince. His voice goes pathetically small. "... Well, aren't you and the princess be- betrothed!??"

"Yes." That was true. You were. And you did love each other- since you were kids. Since he was 6 and you were 5, and you would send him letters every week even when everyone else forgot he existed.

That didn't make Hans like any of this any better.

"P- please your highness." The dignitary begged, his eyes flickering from him to you and back.

Hans looks back to you, a scowl still on his face. You looked alive, at least. Just... very still. And you never slept this way, flat on your back. graceful. You weren't supposed to share a bed until you were married, but you had- so he knew you slept like a graceless freak. There was definitely something wrong.

And there were those dreams... "The witches." Hans whispers, glaring at your form. Except he wasn't glaring at you, he was glaring at Them.

Not that you weren't used to that look on his face. That was pretty much just his face.

"... P- pardon me?"

"What!?"

"You said some something, sir."

"No, I didn't." With that, Hans shrugs the guards meaty hand off his shoulder and kneels by your bed. Picks up your hand on his and holds it to his chest. His eyes soften a tiny bit this close to you, where the other men in the room couldn't see it happen.

Goddamnit, he thinks. Its worth a try.

~

When Hans' lips touch yours in that quiet room, watched by a cranky guard and a nervous dignitary, he feels scarcely a breath slipping past yours. The only way that he knows you're alive is by the very very slow rise and fall of your chest.

In just a manner of moments, though, your fingers come to life and grip his, and you breath in deep through your nose, kissing him back. Like magic.

Despite himself, a small smirk slithers across his face after he finishes kissing you, watching your pretty eyes open up and look foggy- then confused- and he's yanked back up to his feet by the oaf of a guard in charge of him. "Time to go."

"Hey! Wait, I demand you- "

"You're no boss of mine these days, princey." The man growls into his ear, a note of cruelty in his voice. What did I ever do to this guy? Hans wonders, scowling again.

"Wait!- " That was your voice, oh so confused. Your eyes are big and round, taking in the scene. The dignitary quickly helps you to stand, but doesn't let you approach Hans.

"Please princess, he has to go. Everything will be explained."

"But- "

She cuts herself off, this time. But she doesn't need explanation. Hans watches the realisation dawn on her as her calculating eyes drift slowly from the guard, to him.

The plan went awry. Now he's in serious trouble.

"Don't worry, Y/N."

"How am I supposed to not worry!??"

"Just promise to write to me, huh? Promise."

"... fine." And I'll yell at you with every letter of the alphabet, her eyes tell him. He chuckles. Yeah, I got it.

"Come on now, lover boy. To the tower."

~

Not 10 minutes later, the tower cell slams shut on him. Dust from the roof falls down on his shoulders and hair, and his cuffs are still clamped down tight around his wrists creating dark purple bruises.

... after a moment, Hans curses and kicks a hard stone wall. "Fuck!"

-and then a familiar voice creeps into his mind again. The witch. 'Hildie'.

"Great. Now that I know you're hearing me, prince, I have some instructions for you.

And understand; if you don't do as I say I am fully prepared to give your sweet little princess another gift. One she wont be broken so easily out of. So listen carefully.

... first of all my name is not 'Hildie'. You may call me your majesty."

[too-much-tma-stuff]

Good to Have a Home

Previous | Masterpost

For a moment when Danny woke up he wasn’t sure what woke him, he opened his eyes a crack and looked around trying to discover the possible threat without letting on he was awake. He noticed Bruce sitting quietly next to him and realized his father’s presence must have been what woken him. He considered pretending to still be asleep, perhaps father would carry him to bed like in the movies and they could avoid this talk, but it was to early for that and he should put Bruce’s mind at ease.

Danny unfolded slowly from his curled up position with a little groan and sat up, checking where the patch of sun was and realizing he’d been asleep for an hour or less. Hopefully that wasn’t enough to mess up his sleep schedule. He stretched and sighed, crossing his legs and leaning back against the wall as he waited for Bruce to speak.

“I know you’re trying to be strong for your brother Danny, but it’s okay if you’re struggling too. You know that right? You both came from the same place, you’re bound to have some of the same troubles,” Danny snorted and drew up his knees, crossing his arms over them. It was quiet for another minute before Bruce added. “If it makes you feel better, I still struggle with it too. I have a well established public persona, but it never feels natural to me. A gala or a formal interview is harder than fighting crime any day.” He said with a little smile, and Danny laughed though maybe not for the reason Bruce hoped.

“You and Damian, both so much more eloquent with violence then with words,” he said, not fully managing to keep the disdain out of his voice. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Bruce wince a little. “It is hard, but it’s much easier for me then for him since I have the training for this. There’s no point wasting time complaining about it. It would help me more if you could talk to Damian and give him some media training, especially before we do any television appearances.”

“Sure, I can do that,” Bruce said, looking a uncertain. Danyal had to bite back a laugh to see an adult man of his stature looking so helpless, he clearly didn't know what to do with Danny. “You can talk to me wherever you want to you know, about anything. And I would like to talk to you more about this, whenever you’re ready.”

“Of course,” He said like a private joke and got up again. “It must be almost dinner time right? I’m hungry,” He offered Bruce his hand to help him up.

“You’re right, I think Alfred is making something special,” Bruce agreed. He took Danny’s hand but didn’t put any weight on him as he stood, which was fair, both Danny and Damian were a bit small even for their age though he was sure they’d grow soon.

“Sounds good, I’ll go see how it’s going,” Danny said and returned the cushion he took back on the chair before trotting down to the kitchen, Bruce following behind him despite Danny’s subtle attempt to flee.

“Ah, master Danny, it’s good to see you. Care to help me put the finishing touches on the meal?” Alfred asked with a kind smile that Danny couldn’t help but return, instantly feeling a little better. He helped prep toppings for the home made burgers Alfred had made and then carried things to the table.

When everything was finished the rest of the family started to filter into the dining room and Danny wandered over to the secret cupboard that held his bottle of Lazarus water. He pressed the door and slid it up, grabbing the bottle and twisted off the cap. He took a quick swig and grimaced at the taste, shuddering as it flowed like fire down his throat and turned into ice and mist in his chest. His eyes flashed green as he gaped and let his breath out as a freezing fog, quickly rushing over to the table to grab a piece of cheese to wash down the taste.

That was when Damian slunk into the room last looking sulky and maybe a little guilty, Danny glanced at him and then sat down next to Tim. Damian hesitated, looking at the table, to the place next to Danny where he would usually sit, that was not open tonight. He sighed and went to sit next to Casandra. The room was silent other then Alfred announcing there were also veggie burgers should anyone want them as they started to serve themselves. The tension was noticeable and annoying so Danny sighed and decided it would be up to him to break it.

“So when can we start doing tests on the Lazarus water? I really want to find out more about how it works,” He said catching Bruce and Tim’s attention.

“I want to wait until you get the first package with more from Talia. You’re reliant on it so you having what you need is more important then any tests, and until we’re sure there’s a reliable source we should save what we have,” Bruce said.

Both Danny and Tim gave twin disappointed sighs and then looked at each other startled before Danny cracked a smile and Tim smiled back. “The spirit of scientific inquiry huh?” Tim joked and Danny laughed, nodding.

“It should be soon, I sent a letter to mother telling her how being so far away from the pits was affecting me so hopefully we’ll have what we need before long and we can start running tests.” Danny assured Tim before they once again started bouncing ideas off each other again, this time veering into other subjects, both Bat and Wayne tech. Tim’s eyes lit up, gesturing wildly as he explained the newest patent he’d been working on for Wayne enterprises.

Danny demanded to see it after dinner and Tim managed to pretend to be reluctant for all of five seconds before agreeing. After that they both ate too quickly so they could rush off together, Tim eager and happy to have someone to talk at about his projects. Danny was happy too! Glad to be a fresh pair of eyes and give Tim some new ideas of how he could improve the product, or things he could try to help fix the last few issues. Some of Danny’s idea’s were unconventional, but Tim didn’t seem to mind.

They lost track of time and Danny only realized how long it had been when Alfred politely knocked on the door of Tim’s office/inventing room to tell them that it was time for bed. Danny didn’t doubt Tim would ignore that and keep working but Danny was used to having a schedule and now that his focus was broken he realized that he was tired… and very thirsty, and sort of had to go to the bathroom. Oops.

“Alright, thank you Alfred. Don’t stay up to late Tim,” He joked as he stood up and stretched.

“We should do this again sometime soon,” Tim said, pointedly ignoring the comment about his sleep schedule.

“We should, I’m looking forward to it,” Danny agreed before leaving Alfred to pester Tim further to see if he could get the teen to go to bed at a reasonable time.

Danny got ready for bed slowly and slipped under his covers Despite how tired he was he ended up laying on his beck and staring at the ceiling, tracing the constellations and trying not to think about the day. He didn’t want to think about how he hadn’t spoken to Damian since he made the comment about this being easy for Danny. He didn’t want to think that they might be fighting now, was Damian upset too? Was he laying on the other side of the wall awake thinking about how what he’d said upset Danny? Was he sorry? Was he angry?

Danny nearly jumped out of his skin when there was a knock on the wall, well that answered a couple of questions. He stared at the wall. Damian and Danny had slept in the same bed together every night for nearly the first two weeks but since then they’d been doing it less often, just when they’d had a bad day or nightmares, or Danny had heard the call in his dreams again. Tonight Danny wasn’t sure if he wanted to reciprocate, what if Damian was still seeking a fight? But they needed each other.

Danny sighed and sat up, leaning over to knock on the wall in return, inviting Damian to come over. He lay back down and waited, a few moments later his door opened a crack and Damian slipped inside, coming over to lay next to him. Danyal offered his hand the way he always did, without opening his eyes, Damian’s warm callused fingers wrapped around his wrist, seeking his pulse.

Danny didn’t say anything, and Damian didn’t either for a long time but the tension between them was palpable and he knew neither of them was asleep.

“I’m sorry,” Damian murmured finally. “I shouldn’t have said that, I know it isn’t actually easy for you either. I just hate how useless I’ve been recently, you… the family likes you, and you know how to handle the media and I feel like I'm falling behind. I hate feeling useless.”

“Welcome to my world,” Danny snorted bitterly. “How do you think I felt in Nanda Parbat.” Danny opened his eyes and was surprised to see guilt and shame on his brothers face. He too suddenly remembered dozens of timed Damian had lectured and put him down, enforcing the standards put on both of them and making Danny feel worse for his inability to do what was expected of him. “It’s okay,” He murmured. “Don’t apologize or feel bad for anything that was done there.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Damian scoffed, but Danny knew he didn’t mean it. “At least you won’t have to go back now right? You get along well with father, and his adopted children, and of course you have the media training. He’ll obviously choose you.”

“Don’t be silly Damian, you and father are very similar. Father has agreed to give you one on one media training, take the chance to bond with him. You should be the heir to the Bat,” Danny encouraged softly.

“But… You don’t want to go back to the League,” Damian said with a little furrow between his eyebrows.

“No, I don’t. The League doesn’t actually need an heir, grandfather is next to immortal anyway. If he does accept an heir I have a feeling he’ll eventually come to see them as a threat, after his position and end up sending them away or killing them. No, neither of us are going back,” he said firmly.

“But… if I’m going to be heir to the Bat, and you don’t want to be the Demon Head’s heir, what are you going to do?” Damian asked sounding lost and confused. He'd always cared so much about such thing.

“I’m not going to be the heir to anything, I never wanted to be anyway,” Danny said just as softly. He’d never said it so plainly before because Damian wouldn’t understand, he’d always wanted a legacy, a purpose to live up to. “If I end up with a legacy I want it to be my own, not handed down to me with all sorts of traditions and expectations. I want to be my own person, whoever that ends up being. If I couldn’t be that here either I was planning to run away once you were settled, but I think Father won’t mind.”

“Good,” Damian said, his fingers twitching and his grip tightening around Danny’s wrist. “We shouldn’t be separated.”

That made Danny smile, he didn’t think Damian would have said such a thing a few months ago he didn’t think Damian would have admitted he wanted to stay together. “You’re right, we shouldn’t be,” He agreed, reaching out to squeeze Damian’s hand with his free one. “And don’t worry about me Dami, yes it’s still hard on me but I know what I’m doing. I know the league training wasn’t actually easy on you either. We compliment each other well, one excelling where the other falls a bit behind, we can help each other.”

“Hopefully the media training will help,” Damian said with a soft sigh. “Smiling and talking like you do doesn’t come naturally to me. I’ve been trying to practice but my smile always looks… off.”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to have a public persona like Danny or Brucie, you can find one that suits you better, Bruce can probably help you with that,” Danny assured as he curled a little closer to his brother.

“Maybe, thank you,” Damian said softly.

“Of course, thank you for apologizing,” Danny murmured.

They fell silent again, but this time it was a comfortable silence, Danny felt like he could finally relax. And with that he fell asleep quickly.

---------

The talk show host sat behind his desk, the Wayne family scattered around on couches, the twins sat between Bruce and Tim on the bigger couch, on the other side Dick and Cass lounged on a love-seat. It had taken a little arranging to get all of the family in one place but Gotham was always happy to see it, especially to have Dick back from Bludhaven and back with the family. He’d been back more since the twins had arrived of course, wanting to get to know the new siblings, but that hadn’t included many public appearances.

“Thank you for making the time to join me and my studio audience tonight,” The host, Jim Thomas said with a winning smile, sweeping his gaze over all the Waynes present.

“Of course! We’re always happy to be here, especially with such good news as two new children,” Brucie said with a bright smile. Everyone knew Gotham’s billionaire adored kids. It seemed like he didn’t know what to do with himself without having a full house and dealt with empty nest by simply adopting more children.

“Right, two at once this time. One at a time no longer enough for you, Brucie?” Jim teased and Bruce chuckled rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly as the audience laughed.

“To be fair to him, we sought him out. And no one really expects twins right?” Danny said with a chuckle gesturing back and forth between him and Damian.

“I guess not,” Jim agreed as the audience laughed along. “Now I doubt there’s anyone here who doesn’t know who you are but introduce yourself anyway please.”

“My name is Damian Al Ghul-Wayne,” Damian responded first after being gently nudged by Danny.

“And I’m Danyal Al Ghul-Wayne, but I go by Danny,” Danyal followed up.

“Al Ghul must be your mother’s last name?” Jim asked and the twins nodded. “Is that Middle Eastern?”

“Close but no, we were raised in Pakistan which is South Asia,” Danyal said with a shake of his head. There was a soft hiss at the name of their country, a lot of people knew about the violence there. “Thankfully we were very sheltered,” Danyal said before any follow up questions about that could be asked.

“Fair enough,” Jim said with a nod, clearly he’d like to ask more about that but they had gone over what questions would be asked in this interview ahead of time and that was not one of them. “So we heard in the print article how the twins feel about all their new siblings but how do the rest of the siblings feel about the twins?” Jim asked, his eyes sweeping over them. “Let’s go oldest to youngest?” He suggested looking at Dick.

“Oh I’m used to it by now! I was really mad when Bruce brought J-.. My first brother home,” Everyone winced, the family still had a hard time talking about Jason. “But by the time Timmers came around I was used to it and was thrilled to have a new sibling! I swear since then I’ve just gotten happier with each new sibling I get!” He said with a bright, if slightly vacuous smile.

Jim pointed at Tim next who smiled. “It’s been great to have some more geniuses around,” He joked. “Danny is mechanically minded like me, we’ve been working together on some new tech for Wayne corp, he has some creative ideas. Some of them even work!” He laughed and let out an oof when Danny elbowed him. “Neither of the twins know much modern media, so it’s been fun showing them all the movies I consider required viewing, Damian has the best reactions.”

“Well I know we're all looking forward to seeing what you come up with! Cassandra, what about you? These are your first new brothers aren’t they?” Jim asked, looking to Cass.

She smiled at him and started to sign, it was easier on her then talking in front of so many people. Dick translated easily; “She loves having brothers who are so similar to her. They both stretch and train with her every morning though they’re far from professional dancers. Besides it’s nice to not be the baby anymore.”

Jim laughed at the comment. “Fair enough! Some people like being the baby of the family but it’s not for everyone. What about you Brucie, we know you’re happy to have more kids but this brings it to five, How many children is too many?”

“Oof hard questions,” Brucie said leaning back and looking like he was thinking hard. “I’m going to say eight? Give myself some more room to grow! It also depends how many friends my current kids mak,e if I can keep my house full of happy people.” So unlike the quiet, grief stricken home he had grown up in after his parent’s deaths, as far away from that as possible.

“It’s not like all of them live at home anymore! I currently only have 4 under my roof, and whatever friend is staying over of course. There’s room for more, if the right kid comes along of course,” He said cheerfully and all his kids groaned in exasperation making the audience laugh.

“Try to wait for a bit, at least till Danny and Damian and properly adjusted hm?” Jim joked. “Well I’m sure we’re all glad to hear that the family is all settling in well and going strong.

“Us too, we would have hated it if showing up caused issues,” Danny said gesturing back and forth between himself and Damian. “But it’s been really nice to be somewhere we can be ourselves, and just be kids.”

“It hasn’t been coming entirely naturally,” Damian admitted, hands folded in his lap. “Neither has trusting adults, but we have time, and dad has experience with kids who’ve been through… hard times. In that way I know we’re very grateful for our older siblings.”

“There’s probably no one better you two could have ended up with,” The host agreed warmly.

------(Changing back to Danny’s perspective)

The rest of the interview wrapped up well and Danny felt like he was almost bursting with pride that he couldn’t express. Two weeks of intense media training for Damian, he hadn’t enjoyed it, it had been hard and frustrating, but he had stuck with it and it had really paid off tonight! He had done so well in the interview, he had kept a straight face while their adopted brothers were talking and Danny had only had to prompt him once! And it had helped, the interview had still been exhausting but without having to worry about Damian, and with their family there to rely on, less so.

He was still glad to get out from in front of the cameras and back stage to wash off the tv makeup and change out of the scratchy suit before they headed home. Alfred had promised that while they were playing socialite he would be doing some baking, preparing a treat for them when they got home. Danny couldn’t wait!

“Way to go little brothers!” Dick cheered, slinging an arm around both of their shoulders which had Damian snarling and start fighting against the grip. Which backfired as Dick released Danny to hold Damian with both arms and ruffle up his perfectly sicked back hair as Damian made sounds of complaint out outrage. Danny laughed and backed away to avoid getting grabbed again.

“I can’t believe your said you were grateful for us! I’m touched,” Tim teased as well as Damian managed to bite Dick hard, them kick his shin to escape.

“It’s hardly a compliment to call you an experiment,” Damian sniffed turning up his nose at them, though thankfully they just laughed again. Danny was just relieved Damian hadn’t pulled a knife of Dick, he knew his twin had a few stashed in various hiding places on his person. To be fair, so did Danny.

“Really, Chum,” Bruce said softly, resting a hand on Damian’s shoulder, smiling warmly down at him. “You did well, I’m proud of you. Both of you,” He added smiling at Danny as well, who smiled back softly and nodded in acknowledgement. Damian looked like the praise had overwhelmed and shut down his systems. Bruce chuckled and gently led the way out to the car, using his hand on Damian’s shoulder to guide him while he processed.

They all piled in the limo, chatting and laughing, mostly getting out residual nervous energy from the interview. Danny joined in a little, but mostly relaxed next to a silent Damian. When they got home everyone got out and scattered, Cass and Tim rushing to grab a couple cookies before practically running to the cave so they could get out on patrol. Dick broke off with Bruce to talk about something, and Damian and Danny took their time walking back inside together.

“It’s good to be home isn’t it?” Damian said with a soft sigh once the heavy doors closed behind them.

“Good to have a home,” Danny said. Good to have a place where he finally felt safe, where they didn’t have to fight for survival. Good to have a place they could finally be themselves. Whatever happened with school, and hero work, and everything else, it was good to have a home.

[swamp-chicken]

AND CHAPTER 14 IF IT IS WHAT I THINK IT IS O-O STARES AT YOU WITH MY BIG BEUATIFUL NOT UNSETTLING AT ALL EYES PLEASWZ

yeah ok here you go

A chill breeze blew through the courtyard, making Etho shiver. It was only the beginning of autumn, but the mountain wind already smelled of winter. Etho prayed that they wouldn’t see snow on their journey. 

He pulled his cloak tighter around his body and went back to tacking his horse, a shaggy chestnut mare lent by a horse tribesperson. She was no Lulu, but she shared the same intelligent spark in her eyes. 

Bdubs was on the other side of the courtyard, stroking Lulu’s muzzle and speaking to her softly. The wind tossed his hair back and forth.

Cleo drew up beside him. “All ready to go?” she asked.

“Ready as I’ll ever be for this fool’s errand,” Etho grumbled.

Cleo followed Etho’s gaze to where Bdubs stood with Lulu.

“And yet you’ve still agreed to come,” she said archly. “I wonder why?”

Etho gave a particularly vicious tug on the saddle strap and his mare sidestepped unhappily. 

Cleo sighed and patted Etho on the shoulder. “I’m happy you’re coming regardless— beyond happy. If you saw me fighting the dragon in one of your visions, I’m even more sure we should be there together.”

“Like I said, I was dying from a stomach wound when I imagined that. I don’t think you should be taking any stock in fever dreams.”

“Oh, Etho,” Cleo sighed, her voice pitying.

Etho drew his shoulders up, but his retort was interrupted by a flurried approach.

“Etho!” it was Basil, breathless, clutching several rucksacks. Rita was following him at a more sedate pace. Basil skidded to a stop before Etho and Cleo. “I have your, um, travel rations.” He handed one rucksack to Cleo and bowed his head awkwardly. “Priestess.”

He handed Etho the other. “I put crispy chickpeas in yours, I know how much you like them.” 

Etho ruffled his hair. “Thanks, Basil. I hope the kitchen survives without me.”

“It may run a bit better, actually,” Basil said and danced, laughingly, out of Etho’s reach. 

Rita placed a steadying hand on Basil’s back. She nodded to Cleo with a cool, “Priestess.” Her tone was warmer when she turned to Etho. “I have something for you as well.” She handed him a small vial. He held it up to the light and she explained. “The guild apprentices have been working nonstop brewing redstone health potions. I managed to get my hands on this small amount for you. It should help if… well, whatever happens.” 

Etho, touched, pulled Rita into a hug. She stood stiffly in his arms a moment before retreating. Etho was shocked to notice tears in the usually steely woman’s eyes. “It’s all I can do,” she explained, voice unexpectedly fierce. “When your council keeps making decisions without consulting the people who have to pick up the pieces—“ She broke off, glancing at Cleo. Her voice returned to its usual brusqueness. “Just stay safe.”

She turned and left, shepherding Basil with her.

Etho examined the vial in his hands. “Will the journey be that dangerous?” he asked.

Cleo was watching Rita’s retreat with a troubled expression, gathering her himation around her as the chill wind blew. “The Vedra will be looking for us.” 

The wind was still blowing when they were sent off by a solemn group of hill tribe members, as well as Tango and Doc. The small number of people sending them off, their quietness, made Etho all the more certain that this was a fools errand. 

Etho had been assured that their traveling group was kept deliberately small so as to more easily avoid detection, but Etho still felt uneasy.

Bdubs led them, relaxed on Lulu’s back. Etho followed, his form much improved after his summer riding Lulu. Cleo, however, sat stiffly, clutching the reigns so tightly that her knuckles were white. Bdubs pulled up beside her and guided her through some riding basics. “Vibka’s a good girl, she already knows what to do. Just keep your head up and use the reigns to guide, not direct her.“

“I know,” Cleo said through gritted teeth.

Bdubs laughed, easy and free. Etho almost flinched at the sound. “Then just relax!”

“How am I supposed to relax?!”

Cleo’s horse, sensing her rider’s distress, trotted a few mincing steps forward. 

Cleo howled. 

Bdubs darted forward on Lulu and snatched Vibka’s reigns. “Cleo!” he squawked. “What are you doing?!”

Cleo blinked at Bdubs, expression mollified, and they both burst out laughing. 

Etho, following behind them, couldn’t help the ember of envy burning through his heart. 

The rolling plains surrounding the keep gave way to rocky, uneven terrain. All the while, they climbed, the mountains to the east growing ever closer. Their goal was to reach the first mountain pass before nightfall. 

Cleo and Bdubs stuck close, Cleo’s riding skills improving to the point where she at least didn’t seem to be in danger of falling off the horse. Occasionally, Cleo would fall back to check in on Etho, but he wasn’t very good company, answering her queries monosyllabically. 

Bdubs didn’t speak to him at all. 

Gradually, dusk fell, their shadows lengthening below them. 

“We’ll stop here,” Bdubs said, reigning to a stop. They had reached a shallow rocky gully, a small stream passing through it, water fast-moving and clear. “The pass is up ahead, we’ll tackle it tomorrow morning.” 

Etho dismounted and grimaced at the soreness in his legs. His short excursions on Lulu has not prepared him for what a full day of riding felt like.

Cleo was even worse off. “Here, I’ll catch you,” Bdubs offered, standing beside Cleo’s horse. Etho pointedly looked away, swallowing down the memory of when Bdubs had done the same for him, how warm his hands had been on Etho’s waist. 

They tied the horses up to graze and split up to look for firewood, Cleo limping but uncomplaining. There were only a few twisted trees growing here, dwarfed by the cold wind that now was making Etho shiver. Etho gathered some dry brush and watched Bdubs build the fire. It was hypnotizing, the way he gently blew sparks into flame. 

Cleo was sitting on a rock nearby, exhausted and unspeaking. “I’ll get us some water,” Etho offered, breaking the silence. Bdubs handed over his waterskin without a word. 

As the sky darkened, they ate the rations from their pack. The wind calmed with the setting sun, and in the stillness of night Etho could hear the croak of katydids, the burbling of the stream. Bdubs gazed into the fire dreamily, his eyes half-shut.

Cleo was slowly chewing on some dried venison, her himation wrapped tightly around her. Etho held out his bag of crunchy chickpeas. “Want some?”

Cleo took a few chickpeas. “Now why did you get special treatment?” she complained, without any heat. The day’s travel had bedraggled her, the wind tearing her hair out of its braid and reddening her face. Bdubs had made fun of Etho for being a city boy, but he had at least left Timre on research missions. Etho wasn’t sure whether Cleo had ever been out of Timre before the war. She certainly had never slept outside before.

“Well, Cleo, it’s because I’m so special,” he teased, trying to wring a smile out of her.

Bdubs scoffed quietly. The grin fell from Etho’s face. 

Cleo didn’t seem to notice, her eyes distant with thought. “You’ve been working a lot with Healer Rita, I noticed.”

Etho shrugged. “I guess.”

“Has she ever… said anything?”

“What, about you?”

“No!” Cleo said, coloring slightly. “No, I mean, like what she said today. About the council.”

Etho glanced at her sidelong. “She hasn’t. But what she said today made me curious. Why <i>don’t</i> we have any other guilds on the council?”

“Why indeed?” Cleo mused. “Some things have been done a certain way for so long that I think we’ve forgotten they can be changed.”

Bdubs stood abruptly, surprising Etho. “We should get to sleep, it’s another long day tomorrow.”

Etho scraped together a sleeping place for Cleo, layering her bedroll over grasses and brush. Cleo volunteered to take first watch. “I’m not sure I’ll be able to fall asleep anyway,” she said, grimacing at the bed Etho had made for her. 

Bdubs volunteered to take second watch, and that left Etho with the third. 

The fire burned low as Etho and Bdubs settled down to sleep, Cleo sitting at the edge of their campsite, eyes on the horizon. Etho tried not to look over at Bdubs, wrapped tight in his sleeping roll, tried not to remember their journey to Westervale Keep all those months ago, how they had curled together for warmth every night…

“Etho,” Bdubs had whined. He was wrapped up to his chin in bedding, his breath showing in puffs. “‘M cold.”

“I’m coming,” Etho said, swallowing down his laugh. He nudged at the fire’s embers, trying to bank them for tomorrow. Bdubs was more needy since leaving the cottage, though he vociferously denied any and all of Etho’s assistance. He caught their food and built their fire, but at night he crawled into Etho’s arms, exhausted and fragile. 

Etho gave the coals a final stir and turned to Bdubs. “Lemme in!” he said, dancing in the cold.

Bdubs laughed and flipped up a corner of the blanket. “Quick!”

Etho dived into the blankets, and they laughed breathlessly as they knocked against each other, trying to get comfortable. “There,” Etho said, once he had Bdubs in his arms, Bdubs’ face tucked up against his neck. 

“Cosy,” Bdubs murmured, and Etho shivered at the cold press of his nose. 

Bdubs yawned and burrowed closer. “Etho,” he murmured. “Etho, get up.”

A hand on his shoulder woke him. 

[verystrxxwberry]

Hi honey, hope u doing well

May I ask for some headcanon about Castiel and Candy marrige life?

MY CANDY LOVE; married life with Castiel!

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: SFW, Castiel x reader, fluff, long post, probably misspellings!! ↝ 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: Hii! This request was very cute, yet my mind isn't very clear, and I truly hope I wrote coherent stuff. I hope you enjoy it! ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

You lived in Castiel’s apartment since the day you married, though it felt as if you already lived there even before getting an official wedding. It is a big, cozy apartment for the both of you, and he is more than happy to have you around. You two would equally pay for things, though expect Castiel to have a sugar daddy complex and try to spoil you for everything.

Castiel has always been willing to invest his best effort to make sure that your relationship works healthily and greatly. No matter if he is busy with his tours or composing some of his songs, he wants to give you enough attention as well. And when Castiel is in love, he is very attentive and romantic!

He looks at his ring in awe, remembering the meaning behind it. And when he is holding your hand, he raises it gently to kiss the exact spot where your ring is, his eyes shinning with love. It makes him feel so excited and lucky inside.

Even if he is used to waking up besides you, his heart still quickens when he opens his eyes and sees you right there. A soft smile appears on his face, feeling very lucky to having deserved the title of your husband. He’d admire your calm behavior, memorizing every single feature of your face, his smile growing with affection. His hand would carefully massage your scalp, making sure it only helps you to relax even more, not to wake you up.

He takes advantage of your sleeping form to go and prepare breakfast for you two. Then he brings it to bed.

Castiel is well aware of your preferences, so he’d basically spoil you for special breakfasts, lunches and dinners. The anniversary dinners are the better ones! He prepares the whole house with sweet candles, making the lightning give a more intimate and romantic environment. 

Completely trusts you to dye his hair! It’s a part of the monthly routine at this point, and you two have a lot of fun when you’re doing that. You take funny pictures of him, and he absolutely adores every single one of those pics as they save all the fun you had. 

He loves to take pictures of the most special moments with you. He even takes secret pics of you so he can stare at them when he is in a tour. He constantly gets teased by his bandmates about being such a simp, yet he shows his ring and proudly says “well, who’s married and loved and who’s not?”

When he is doing a tour, he makes sure to have morning and night calls just to check on you. He loves to hear you ramble about whatever crosses your mind. And even if he teases you about talking too much, he absolutely adores seeing your talkative side. It has been normal for both of you to see him go on a tour. He’ll always bring you some gifts from wherever he has gone, but good news…

Most of the time, whenever you’re free, he is kidnapping you to another country so he doesn’t miss you every single night. Of course, to do this he had to have a talk with his band members like “would you agree if I bring my spouse on our tours..?” 

And hell yeah, he achieved to make them agree! His relationship with you is known, he might post stuff with you on his Instagram and be proud about having you as his spouse. And expect this man to post stories with pics of you and 300 emojis of 😍💕 

Castiel is so in love. Even after any concert he gives a grateful speech where he always thanks you for being a great support on his career.

He can give you free guitar classes if you’d like too. And if you like to sing, he could be the guitar and you could be the voice. Though expect him to praise you a lot.

Oh, yes, the only problem… he might play his guitar late at night, when he needs to practice for any future concert, when he needs to unwind or when he is simply bored. The moment you let him know that he’s bothering you, he’d go quickly to bed like a sad puppy and apologize, filling you with kisses and hugs.

Castiel is very clingy when you both are in private! Even though he isn’t scared of being clingy in public, keeping his hand casually on your waist, planting short kisses on your cheek… but when you both are in private, expect him to be all over you. He’d have an arm around your shoulders so you can rest your head on his chest, as his free hand place your legs over his. And let’s not forget about the spontaneous kisses! He’d surely give you small kisses on your head, forehead, cheek, and finally lips.

Those cold winter noons, when the sun is finally hid and the day is ending, he’d keep you by his side on the couch, under a blanket and cuddling you as you see a random show or movie on the TV.

When you both can have a stable economy, every anniversary would result in traveling to some foreign country! Castiel has been in some places already, but the experience of going with you is definitely different and much better.

There would be a part of your daily routines where you both go on a walk with your pet (because it is a must to have a dog if you're living with Castiel, my bad) together and simply yap about whatever comes through your mind. And Castiel is very talkative as well. It is very easy to have fun with him and the laughs are always assured.

Castiel is very supportive with whatever you like, always pushing you to achieve your dreams. You also do the same for him, and he naturally wants to see you happy for achieving things in your life. He worries a lot about your mental health.

But he also worries a lot about your physical health, reaching the point of going out of the apartment to smoke so he doesn’t bother you (and he’d fill his clothes with perfume so the tabaco is subsided and doesn't bother you). 

And whenever you get sick, he truly hopes to be there and take care of you since the beginning. It hurts him in the heart when he is in a practice and receives the message of you having temperature :(. He makes his best to leave as soon as possible and then rushes to go back home, he can’t leave his spouse feeling dead while he is away!

Has a whole album of pics since your teen years until the recent ones which he fills every year and during the anniversary night, as you both are together cuddling in bed, he opens it and shows all the new pics that had been collected in the past year.

Night routines are always important, and he definitely wants you to teach him how to do a proper skincare routine, so his skin is always bright and stunning. 

I'm sure he'd trust you to shave his beard when it starts growing.

He is cuddly during the night and very talkative if he’s got the energy. So you two would lie down, sometimes his head on your chest or the other way around. Then your dog would join to bed and you three would be a happy family in bed!

Castiel likes to take you to some of the first spots where you both had your first dates as teens and do the same stuff again just to feel nostalgic.

At some point in your lives he’ll give you the speech of considering having kids. He’d love to have kids with you, the excitement of seeing you pregnant and taking care of you during that time is a thought that has crossed his mind lots of times. And damn he truly wishes. He wants to be a proud grandpa of his grandchildren and educate them, play with them and see them grow up.

In conclusion, you’re the softest spot of this man, and he is bragging whenever he can about having built an incredible life with his favorite person!

✰; remember to reblog and like to support my content, I hope you enjoyed it!

[didyoulookforme]

1 and 29 for bf matty?? :) he’s so precious to me

from the prompt list here.

warning: smut. masturbation. a bit of spit involved. cumplay. me rambling.

so this is about a week after you both admit you like each other and finally talk it out. you agree it’d be stupid not to try, when it’s now so obvious you both want this. but you ask matty if you can wait on the sex—everything else is fair game, and god, you want to, so badly, because hello, gorgeous man you’ve been dying to get your hands on is finally yours—but you just want to hold off on getting his dick inside you. just in case. on the minuscule off chance it doesn’t work out. he obviously agrees, because at this point, he’d do anything for you. now that the love of his life is actually interested in him.

anyway, even though you’ve known each other for almost half your lives, this is all so new and exciting that neither of you can hide it. you feel like two horny teenagers again that get needy with just a single touch. when he came over tonight, it didn’t take long for the two of you to end up making out, hands all over, both lightheaded because neither of you want to waste time breathing when you could have your tongues in each other’s mouths instead. and you silently agree. that’s a much better use of your time.

you’re both so eager to learn everything about each other, and that’s why, between him licking and biting your bottom lip, you so sweetly ask if you can watch him jerk off. he freezes, finally inhaling for what feels like the first time since he arrived, before resting his forehead against yours, a grin very clearly appearing on his face. he nods, his voice barely above a whisper, but you can still hear the intrigue behind it. “‘f course, darling.”

and this is why the both of you end up on your bed again—matty seated against your headboard, his yo la tengo shirt the only thing left on his body. one leg stretched out in front of him, the other slightly bent as he gets himself off right in front of you, just like you asked. his head shifts from resting against the wall to tilting down to watch himself, and even that alone drives you absolutely mad.

“you’re so fucking hot, baby.”

he can’t help but gaze at you and smile at your words as he continues to stroke himself, not slow but not so fast either. you notice how his right hand slightly twists as he pumps the top half of his dick, every now and then using his thumb to collect some of the translucent precum for ease. his left hand either rests on his stomach, holding his shirt up, or stays loosely wrapped around the base of his length, keeping himself in place. it’s the most mesmerizing thing you think you’ve ever seen and really hope it’s not the last time this will happen.

“i’ve never done this before, y’know.”

his words shatter whatever trance you were under, and you swear your heart, mind, and body could split in half right then and there. because you both have obviously slept with other people before, never in your wildest fucking dreams did you think matty would be doing something for the first time with you. and now your mind is sprinting, running through every possibility, every other first you could be for him. but you do your best to drag your thoughts back to the present, because he's breaking apart right in front of you, and you need to watch every second of it.

once you get your head back on right—oh fuck, and now his hips are moving in time with his hand—you want nothing more than to be the reason he comes undone. so you hold your hair back, lean forward until your mouth is hovering over his tip, and look up at him through your eyelashes, asking if you can.

he barely gets out a “yes, baby” before you spit on him, pulling back just in time to watch matty’s face twist in pleasure as he uses it to stroke himself, faster now, messier. the sounds he’s making are fucking obscene, and you’re burning every single one into your brain, locking them away so you can replay them at a later date when it’s just you and your hand.

it’s just a few minutes more before you notice his hand lift up his shirt a bit higher because you know he’s close. confirmed seconds later by the way he keeps whispering that he’s coming, over and over again. you watch as his cum spills over his hand, making a warm, sticky mess of it. you take note of how he keeps his grip around himself even after he's done, even after he’s gone soft in his own hand. his face is slick with a thin layer of sweat, curls sticking to his forehead as he tries to steady his breathing. he’s so fucking pretty like this—your wrecked, ruined boy.

you shift up slowly, kneeling beside him, fingers cupping his face as you brush damp curls back from his forehead. then you finally kiss him again, swallowing the tiny, whimpers slipping from his mouth in the aftermath. when you pull back, your gaze flickers down to his hand, to his sticky, shaky fingers, and you don’t even realize you’re licking your lips until he laughs, breathless and dazed. he lifts his hand, bringing it to your face, and you can’t look away, your breath catching as he presses his thumb against your bottom lip, silently asking for permission.

so you part your lips, tongue sliding over the pad of his thumb before sucking it deeper into your mouth without hesitation. his whole body shudders at the feeling, and you grin around his finger when he moans at the fact that you’re eagerly and happily licking his cum off his hand.

"i don’t even know what i’m doing right now." matty barely gets the words out, aimed more at himself than you. because you know damn well that this is almost too much for him. he’s overwhelmed. fuck, you are too but in the best way possible. it’s like you’re floating outside your own body, just watching this unfold, completely stunned that it’s real. that it’s you—your mouth, your hands, your body—doing this to him after all these years. and honestly? you couldn’t feel luckier <3

[itsallpoliticsstupid]

I've been involved in Politics for a really long time. I'm not even 35 yet and I have already studied and worked in this area for more than half of my life.

A lot of the reason I got into Politics was I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to give something back and serve my country. Not because I'm particularly nationalistic. I'm not a huge fan of most of those in power, and I don't really like the monarchy all that much. It's because I was always taught to do what I can to make the world a better place. And in my role I can do that.

But it's so hard sometimes when I go into work with the knowledge that those who have been elected constantly belittle and demean us just because we are public servants.

Yes, the civil service has massive issues. But widescale fraud is not one of them. People not working 'hard enough' is not one of them. People wanting to spend one day a week at home to work, where they can work in a quieter atmosphere and be more productive, is not one of them.

Because the reality is, as I pointed out in another post, fraud is basically impossible to be involved in whilst being a civil servant. Almost all Western Democracies have strict fraud management and money laundering policies. Every dollar is accounted for. Everything is signed off to a high level. Fraud is not your biggest issue.

Neither is civil servants not working 'hard enough.' I have friends who were in Ukraine and Russia when the war escalated in 2022. Friends who were in Kabul when the Taliban reclaimed Afghanistan. Friends in Yemen, in Syria, in Lebanon, all when regional conflicts started. I have friends who were in Paris during the terrorist attacks, and Brussels. And all these people were just ordinary people, who were caught up in a bad situation. And you know what they did? They didn't run away.

They stayed behind and helped. They helped to support our citizens overseas in getting out of these countries. In finding loved ones when things were chaotic. They didn't shy away from this, even though in many cases it wasn't their job to do it. Because they are good people, who work extremely hard.

Even me, I haven't been in those situations, but I work on one of the most challenging and complex Foreign Policy issues in the world right now. It's hard. It's physically and mentally draining seeing what I see. But I do it because I believe in my work. I enjoy it. I'm good at it. And every day I go in I work damn hard, because I want to make the world a better place.

Even with the tide turning against people like me, I will still fight. I will do what I can to help.

Don't get me wrong. I would much rather be in a situation like somebody like @mishacollins. Have a good platform and uses it to try and educate people on what is going on. It would be far far easier for me. I wouldn't spend every waking moment staring at the news, making sure I was up to date on what was happening in world events; working 70 hours a week and then learning a new language on top of this. But I don't have that, so I do this instead.

I guess my point in all this is, it angers me so much what is happening to my fellow public sector workers in the United States. Of course, some will be your average career civil servants who landed a good job and never left. But there are those like me who just want to make a difference, and this is how they do it.

And now, if they don't align themselves with a philosophy that they don't agree with, they will be forced out.

And that is absolutely disgusting.

I don't expect many people to engage with this post. But I just needed a place to rant, and sometimes this is the only place I really can.

Now, I will enjoy my weekend and come back on Monday fresh and ready to take on the world. I just hope it doesn't fall apart during my limited time to enjoy myself.

[holy3cake]

Hello, Trouble

Chapters: 2/2

Fandom: Boarders

Rating: Explicit (only part 2)

Pairing: Rupert x Male Reader

Summary: After attending St Gilbert's on a scholarship, you start to reminisce on your time away from home. It's the Spring Ball, and Carol has just given you your final marching orders. Is it too late to admit that you have a massive crush on the dumbest boy in school? Is your deviant roommate going to even care that you're being expelled? Perhaps Rupert cares about you more than you think, but there's only one way to find out.

"Sure, Rupert was possibly the worst roommate you’d ever had, but you would miss the chase. It was thrilling, not knowing whether the arrogant Aphrodite would ruin your life or fall into a soft caress."

Chapter 1: Repression

As the ugly coach pulled up, you tried not to roll your eyes at the students milling about at your side. Most of them had leafy-green faces, matching the hideous lining of the so-called school bus. It was due to binge drinking of course, which despite your course leader constantly lecturing on the subject, was falling on deaf ears. Even though you never really liked the taste of cheap cider or stupidly expensive whisky, you always joined in. It was a ritual of sorts, and you knew better than to dob Abby in if she popped the pills out again. Of course, the distraction never worked for you. Not even as you boarded the bus and bumped into the class harlot, flicking her unsightly fair hair from her face. Florence was poison, but you’d never tell her why you hated her so much. You’d laugh, and pretend every word out of her whorish mouth was hilarious. Which is what you chose to do at that moment, chugging down a swig of your luxurious yet foul Scotch. 

“Oh, Florence! Gorgeous heels, darling.” You drawled, knowing full well that she was wearing last season Prada. She simpered, blowing an egregious kiss full of Tiffany and stark perfume back in your direction. 

“Thank you! It’s our Spring ball, have to make an effort you know?” Florence looked you up and down, as if she was sneering at your outfit choice. Possibly as she wasn’t used to seeing such bare skin in public, or she had no taste whatsoever. You knew it was the latter, when her tongue was so far down Jahiem’s throat. With a forced smile you giggled back, straightening your striped jacket. 

“I completely agree. Enjoy your night, Flo.” It was difficult to stay civil with her, but you forced down your disdain to move further along the bus. Florence wasn’t worth a minute of your time, and you didn’t want to look at her powered face any longer. You swore that she scoffed behind your back, but again, it wasn’t worth a sneeze let alone an acknowledgement. Instead you decided to locate your friends, a genuine smile spreading across your face when you discovered Toby and Abby canoodling at the back of the bus. They leapt apart at your arrival, blushing madly as though nothing had ever happened. Toby patted the space beside them, and you clinked his bottle of vodka with your own glass as you plonked down. 

“‘Sup rude boy? You got beef with Flo again?” Toby grinned, throwing his arm around his sweet girlfriend. Unlike Florence, you’d been friends with Abby for years, and you knew she wasn’t the enemy. Even if she would report back to the blonde witch, you didn’t exactly hide your feelings regarding said cow. 

“She’s playing J. You know that.” You jogged your knee, hoping Toby would be pacified with that response. 

“Nah, bro. Ain't our business, is it? You sure it’s not because she dissed your man?” Toby smirked, sensing the oncoming jab that you delivered to his ribs. 

“He’s not my man, he’s a fucked-up mummy’s boy that thinks he’s God’s gift. Just because he’s my roommate, I don’t have to give a shit about him, Tobes.” At the mention of the deviant living in your shared dorm, your anger flared. Toby seemed to have some delusional idea that you cared about him, even though you despised him more than Florence. But as you stewed, you didn’t realize Abby and Toby quietly cackling at your outrage. 

“Oh, you’ve got it bad, baby. So what if you have a thing for him? It’s not like anyone else does.” Abby shrugged, kicking her feet up. 

“How about the fact that he’d beat the shit out of me? I don’t need that drama.” You didn’t resist the urge to roll your eyes this time, gulping down throatfuls of heated alcohol to match the fury on the outside. 

Rupert Watlington-Geese was a menace to society. You’d seen the videos of him pouring champagne on homeless people before you’d even joined the school, and the real man was worse than the internet fiend. On your first meeting he’d hidden your boxers and claimed it was an initiation ritual, forcing you to go commando against itchy school trousers in the first period. Childish pranks would’ve been fine, but his behaviour had started to get rowdy from your second glance. From the rumours that the little shit had spread, you’d had more sexual experience than most B-list celebrities. You didn’t hide the fact that you were gay, but somehow you’d had a threesome with two teachers and sucked off four boys behind the bike sheds. But you knew Rupert’s game, and somehow had grown used to the inane stunts that he’d pull in an attempt for attention. 

In other instances, you would’ve grown tired and ignored him from the get go. However, if you had, you wouldn’t have seen when Rupert’s mischievous eyes grew sad, and he’d cried dismally into his pillow. You’d never tell Abby or Toby in a million years, but you knew how warm Rupert felt when he’d melted against you in a depressive episode. If his dad had promised to visit but stood him at the last minute, Rupert would always come to you for comfort. Florence was useless in those moments, she’d never understand how fragile Rupert was under all the ego and false cockiness. So perhaps you were a little more susceptible to Rupert’s fragility than you thought, but he didn’t make it easy on you. One day he’d be flashing you his trademark smirk, pretending that he enjoyed his empty existence of pranks and hurting people. On another day, he’d be breaking down in your arms and blinking back tears through those beautiful chestnut eyes. That was another thing that irritated you. Rupert was fucking gorgeous, and a combination that you’d never encountered before. He was ethereal, pale skin glowing in the darkness like some mystical creature. His hazel eyes were always looking at you, whether they were earnest or scheming. And those curls. God, you wanted to tug those magical curls until he cried. Okay, maybe you were lying a little to yourself. There was a definite attraction there, but you were 90% certain that he’d smash your face in if you told him. 

As you were daydreaming, it was as though your thoughts could summon fiction into reality. The man in question bounded up the bus steps, and Abby took the opportunity to torture you further. She sent you a cheeky smile before making her intentions clear, and you turned in horror to the spare seat beside you. 

“Rupert! Join us!” Abby’s voice perforated your ears like a megaphone, and you knew you had to move quickly. But to your dismay, the coach had filled up in record time, and you couldn’t move without leaving the bus entirely. Instead, you downed the remains of your Dalmore single malt and smiled with too much teeth as Rupert sat beside you. His outfit could’ve given you a cardiac arrest, but you remained calm. His rumpled curls were slicked back behind his ears, exposing far too much of his neck. Rupert’s black silk shirt (if you could call it that) cut down into a sharp v-shape, exposing a little bit of his chest. The scent of Lynx Africa infiltrated the bus, and you wanted to gag, or gag him. He looked like a ridiculous rich boy that had been dressed by Carol, yet your jeans grew tighter at his appearance. You wanted to strip him bare, to rip away whatever hideous designer clothes that his mum had chosen for him and pin him against the faded bus seats. The Scotch was making you reckless, and you had to relax, lest actually find out what Rupert’s tongue tasted like. 

“Hi, dickhead.” Rupert greeted you, which didn’t help in the slightest. Today he was wearing his snarkiest grin, which made you want to bite the arrogance away. But then you felt the pang of empathy, causing you to look away and grip your arm. Honestly, you knew why you were feeling such a whirlwind of emotions. Carol had delivered the final blow to your confidence earlier that day, and you had to tell Rupert the truth. 

What was the truth? That you’d lost your scholarship, of course. That’s why you were scrambling to answer a sarcastic salutation from your nemesis, because you had to tell him that you’d never see him again. You wondered if he’d even blink at your news, or if he’d just tell you it was a valiant effort and you didn’t belong there. Sure, Rupert was possibly the worst roommate you’d ever had, but you would miss the chase. It was thrilling, not knowing whether the arrogant aphrodite would ruin your life or fall into a soft caress. Yes, you had stroked his wet cheeks before. But as Abby had declared weeks ago, the Spring ball was certainly the time to tie up loose ends and live the night like it was your last. So, what was on your agenda as the bus pulled away from the school and headed to one of the rascal’s ridiculously large estates? You turned to Rupert, flicking your fringe from your eyes as you beamed at him. 

“Hello, Trouble.” You beamed, eyes sparkling as you gazed into those cat-like eyes. 

Tonight, you were going to break a preposterously ugly bed, donated by the National Trust. Or two. And a thousand year-old table, when Rupert suggested it. 

Chapter 2: Liberty (NSFW WARNING HERE)

It was hard to remember how you ended up in this situation, with Rupert’s hands down your pants and your dick ready to burst with his rough onslaught. But you definitely weren’t complaining, you just wished you had a clearer head when your tip started to throb. Rupert’s hot breath was on your neck, and with one hand kneading your balls and one expertly caressing your cock, you tried to withhold the gasps escaping your throat. It wasn’t until you gripped the rich boy’s shoulders that you halted him, cursing yourself for delaying such a strong orgasm. 

“Rupert! Wait, wait. My head is spinning.” The Scotch had been brutal on you, and you definitely didn’t want to ruin the mood by passing out or throwing up. Rupert raised one eyebrow elegantly, but obediently pulled his hands away. What you didn’t expect was for him to hold your hand, steering you to sit on the creaky bed in whichever bedroom you’d decided to argue in. He left for a moment, returning with a glass of water that he’d seemingly produced from nowhere. As you took the glass, your hands met again and you tried not to let the soft feeling linger. It was so out of character for him to be kind to you, but you drank the cool water regardless. He sat almost tentatively beside you, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Beatrix wasn’t trying to hurt you, you know. She was trying to stop a fight.” Rupert suddenly announced, staring up at the four-poster bed. 

“What?” You sat up, finishing the water. 

“You called her a nosy cow. You called Florence a lot worse but…” Rupert shrugged, trying to hide the grin on his face. 

Hearing the word cow suddenly brought a drunken flashback into perspective. You’d arrived at the party in good spirits, clinging to Toby and Abby like a third arm. But the underlying tension was still gnawing at you, and you tried to dance as though nothing was wrong. You’d danced with Jahiem and Femi, which didn’t cause any problems, not until Jahiem had sought out Florence on the dancefloor. Pretending as though you were on top of the world, you’d gritted your teeth again and offered to spin Florence around. Except when she’d slipped conveniently into Jahiem’s arms, you’d called her a cheap slut that opened her doors more frequently than a lift. That was until Bea had gently tapped you on the back with gentle eyes and pure intentions, which had only aggravated you further. 

“Oh, Bea. I should find her and apologise.” But as you tried to stand, your head whirled and Rupert sniggered at your attempt to walk. 

“Might be a bit hard, considering you can’t use your feet. Sit down, you cock.” Rupert tutted at you, but there was a curious look in his eyes. 

“What?” You glared, crossing your arms. 

“You’re concerned about Beatrix, but you won’t apologise to Florence?” Rupert frowned, but you weren’t sure if he was annoyed about that. 

“No. Why should I? Because she’s your precious little girlfriend? Please.” You managed to laugh, leaning back against the ugly bed sheets. 

“Don’t take the piss. She’s not a slag.” Rupert growled, making you jump. You were unsure of his feelings before, but he seemed content to play second best to his ex-girlfriend again. There was a protective spark in his tone, and even though you should’ve yielded, you couldn’t care less. If he wanted to get back with his girlfriend whilst simultaneously wanking off another guy, it wasn’t your problem. That was his prerogative, and you had nothing left to lose anyway. With a bitter laugh, you nudged his shoulder and rolled your eyes. 

“I really don’t care what she is. Go and waste your time chasing after her, Rupert. I’m sick of your constant bullshit.” Finally regaining feeling in your legs, you rose from the bed and stumbled to the door, fumbling for the handle. To your surprise, the deviant was back at your side, blocking the exit. 

“I mean it! Get out of my fucking way.” You squared up to him, ready to fight. You were pretty sure that was what caused Rupert to touch your cock originally, but that wasn’t your main focus anymore. His moping and whining had set your veins alight, and there was no point at all listening to him defend his “true love”. 

“You’re sick of my bullshit?! What a joke! What about you, huh?” Rupert cornered you, and you held up your fists defensively. Whilst you weren’t sure if he’d actually hit you, you couldn’t tell his mood right now. The strutting peacock had shown his feathers, but the arrogance wasn’t the same as usual. Rupert seemed to be lashing out because he was hurt, it was written across his face in petty insolence. As you took a step back he followed you, glowering with those frighteningly beautiful eyes. 

“Hanging around the popular kids like a little stalker, hoping that someone will notice you? Do you think you’re fucking special, hm? You’re nothing.” Rupert spat insidiously, physically showering you with his spit. Even as the tiny glob landed on your cheek, you made no attempt to move. Whilst you burned on the inside, you fought the urge to bite your lip. Hearing him insult you shouldn’t have been hot, but Rupert was a different breed when he was angry. Perhaps because you’d never seen him show such genuine fury, it made you want to poke the bear. So that’s what you did. 

“Oh, sweetheart. I don’t need to be noticed. At least my mummy and daddy loved me.” You took the higher ground, watching conflict flash across startled hazel orbs. 

“How does it feel, Rupert? Knowing that your mummy prefers your brother? Laying awake at night whilst your girlfriend takes Jahiem’s cock up her-” You reeled at the taste of blood, eyes widening as you gently dabbed your lip with your thumb. Your cheek was starting to sting, and you were bewildered that Rupert had actually slapped you. Through the hurt, your cock started to stand to attention again. Fuck. You weren’t sure what was worse, the fact that you were ragingly hard, or that Rupert would see the bulge in your jeans soon enough. The slap brought back your senses, and you held both hands up. 

“Alright, enough! I don’t want to fight with you.” You thought that would be enough to soothe the enraged egomaniac, but he was still heading straight for you. You braced yourself for a punch this time, but a frosty finger rested gently against your lip instead. Rupert watched you wince slightly as he ran his nail over your open wound, eyes flickering down towards your belt. The gentle action made you tremble, goosebumps littering your arms and tugging the tiny hairs on the back of your neck. Rupert stepped closer, allowing you to see the ragged rise and fall of his chest. Perhaps the panting was from anger, but you wanted to make him breathless in other ways. 

“Why not, hm? I thought you loved the chase.” Rupert outright purred, pressing you into the bedpost. You gasped, equally shocked at his accusation and the close proximity of his body. If you moved your hands, you’d feel the outline of his hips through his stupid silk shirt. This pitiful plush boy had you sussed, but you couldn't fault his observation. You did love the chase, and the prospect of leaving the school without even kissing this idiot was unthinkable. Without worrying about the consequences anymore, you gripped hideous material and kissed his imbecilic, impeccable lips. 

Whether or not he wanted to protest that he wasn’t gay, Rupert lost himself when you attacked his lips. He didn’t seem stunned at all by your advance, instead biting at the little cut on your lower lip. You groaned, meeting the aggressive swipes of his tongue with the edge of your own. God he was such a good kisser, using his hips to grind against you as your tongues played for dominance. You ran one hand up his back, snaking your fingers into his slick curls as his own digits threaded into your belt loops. A glorious moan left his lips as you wrenched his head back, gripping fistfuls of his curls as you licked down his throat. 

“No more wisecracks for me, Trouble?” You uttered softly, drawing a map of his shoulders with your tongue. Each bite and nip made him gasp, but you felt a particularly deep rasp when you reached his nipples. It was a little sad really, wondering if Florence had ever worshipped him thoroughly like this. Judging by the way he tensed and bucked against you when you pinched those gorgeous rose-pink nipples, you doubted anyone had ever explored him properly. You wanted to rectify that immediately, popping the buttons on his shirt as you reached his waist. Rupert’s hands were tangled in your floppy hair, and you were grateful for such thick locks at last. He suddenly tugged on your scalp, forcing your head upwards. 

“Will…Will you…” Rupert panted lightly, looking uncharacteristically shy. There was that slight vulnerability again, so you wanted to reassure him. Moving from your crouched position, you cupped his face and pressed your lips together again. It was a little softer, a little kinder, yet still full of heat and desperation. Rupert pawed at you, dry-humping your thigh in search of friction. 

“Will you fuck me? Make me cry…please…” Rupert rasped, hand dropping to your zipper. Your throat vibrated in response, creating a somewhat animalistic rumble. Not only did he want you to fuck him, but his warm whisper shook something deep within you. This demon would certainly be your undoing, but you welcomed Hell with open arms. To begin your descent you nodded furiously, stripping as though your clothes were offensive. 

“You want me to fuck you, sweetheart? How badly?” You couldn’t resist teasing him, slowly easing your hand under his boxers. If he wasn’t so flustered and breathless, you would’ve yanked his trousers and boxers down immediately. But he looked so pretty painted with pink, you decided to draw out his little gasps further. Your hand circled his ass, squeezing one cheek as he urged you closer. 

“Badly. Hard. Until I break.” Rupert groaned back to you, seemingly impatient. Taking a little pity on him you melded your lips together, intoxicated with his rich taste. How someone could taste luxurious was beyond you, but he did. You savoured his spit, panting harder when he smeared it against your mouth. At the same time your finger reached his hole, startling him into a long drawn-out gasp. The muscle was so tense, constantly puckering as you gently played with him. You couldn’t see it, but there was a little puddle forming at the front of his trousers, spreading whenever you caressed his hole. Touching it clearly wasn’t enough for either of you, and Rupert wrapped his arms around you in an effort to tempt you further. Your cock pressed painfully against his abs, begging you to devour this brat the way you wanted to. Rupert touched your weeping head, gesturing at the ancient bed with a flick of his curls. He led you to the mattress, throwing the remains of his shirt away as he detached from you for a moment. The distance seemed to physically hurt him, but his signature smirk returned when he tossed his trousers and boxers in one sweep. You swore that your dick somehow grew at the sight, but you reached optimum hardness from the moment he kissed you. You watched as he climbed onto the bed, trying to keep your jaw from dropping as he got down on all fours. 

“Are you going to just stand there and stare all day?” Rupert grinned, usual cockiness returning in time just to make you smile. 

“It is a very nice view, after all.” You smiled back, moving to join him on the bed. A light amusement had broken through the tension slightly, and you felt warm all over when you stroked down his bare back. Rupert was biting his lip, eyes bright and full of mischief when he stared back at you. You held his gaze, bringing both hands down to rest against his plump butt. Unspoken emotions stirred in the pit of your belly, but you focused on bringing Rupert pleasure instead. Massaging each round mound in your hands, you slotted yourself between his legs, running a thumb over the furled muscle again. 

“Do you have any lube, Trouble?” You asked, noticing a slight blush creep down Rupert’s back. 

“N-Not here. I wasn’t exactly prepared for this, you know!” Rupert scowled, looking a little annoyed yet disappointed. 

“It’ll have to be the old fashioned way then. But I’ll take care of you.” You leaned forward, licking the shell of Rupert’s ear. “Do you want to stop, baby?” 

“No. Please, please don’t go..” Rupert begged, the tinge of fright outweighing the irritance in his tone. Your heart thudded painfully, he sounded so small and scared at the possibility of you leaving him. Planting firm but soft kisses down his spine, you felt him relaxing at the affirmation of your touch. You spread his legs, rubbing his hole slowly until his head fell forward in exhilaration. 

“I’m not going anywhere, Rupert. Forget everything else, I’m here.” You mumbled softly, threading your free hand through his fingers. He held onto you, closing his eyes as he enjoyed anything you gave him. Your lips dipped lower, and you kissed each cheek before burying yourself between them. It felt as though your cock was screaming at you, knowing that you’d soon be fucking such a gorgeous brat. But your dick could wait, you did not care about him at the moment. No, you wanted to make Rupert cry after all, and you could scarcely wait to see him shuddering in pleasure. Your tongue darted out, and you dragged it down the base of his spine, flattening it against his entrance. Rupert was trembling slightly, and you decided not to torture him for too long. Holding onto his thighs, you lapped at his hole, dipping slightly inside whenever he whined. His cock was dripping, you could hear it between each smear of your spit. It caused you to speed up, one of your hands creeping underneath to stroke his leaking head. 

“Hasn’t anyone ever fucked you with their tongue before?” You wondered aloud, switching to sucking on his rim whilst you waited for an answer. 

“What do you think, smartass?!” Rupert retorted, covering his face with his arm. His back was arching, cock slipping further into your grip. You grinned, spitting onto his asshole as he panted. 

“Then I’m glad to be the first.” You replied, slathering all of the wetness into his opening. Even though he was glistening already, you needed to be sure that he was sticky enough to feel good. If you ended up hurting him this way, you didn’t think you could ever forgive yourself. Your tongue gravitated back inside him, pressing your thumb against the sensitive nerves on the outside. Rupert clawed the sheets and your hand, blunt nails digging against your palm. 

“Put…put your finger inside me.” He demanded, scraping his lower lip with his teeth. His curls stuck to his forehead, sweaty with desire. 

“Promise me you’ll tell me if it’s too much?” You withdrew your lips, still caressing his butt as he struggled to speak. 

“I will. But I don’t think I could be any wetter if I were a girl…” Rupert chuckled weakly, pressing a soft kiss to the back of your palm. You definitely weren’t expecting him to say something like that, but woe betide you to refuse his wishes. One hand still firmly gripping Rupert’s, you released a breath and slid a finger inside him. It was just your finger, yet he thrust his ass back against you and seemed ecstatic. 

“Shit! Another, please!” Rupert whimpered, and it suddenly dawned on you that he’d probably had something up his ass before. Perhaps not a cock, but he’d certainly done this with his own fingers. You shared a moan with him, scissoring another finger alongside the first as he took you easily. 

“How..how are you not taking me right now? Don’t you like it, hmm?” Rupert started to tease you again, but you felt that same thrill wrack through your body at his words. You rewarded him by curling your fingers upwards, pulling them out before jamming them back in. He yelled out, reaching for his cock but failing to grab it before you pinned his hand down. 

“Rupert…you know I want you…” You whined back, thrusting faster as Rupert writhed under your touch. 

“Then don’t wait anymore. Fuck me!” Rupert shoved his ass against you, pouting at your words. It made sense that he’d be demanding in bed, but you felt the same wave of sadness wash over you from earlier. You loved Rupert’s cheeky insolence, but maybe he’d never been able to fully embrace it with Florence. You wondered if their intimacy had always been rushed, with Florence retreating to her phone afterwards. You would never ask of course, but everyone gossiped. Shaking your head slightly to the intrusive thoughts, you pulled your fingers out and allowed Rupert to rub against your cock. He was the one you wanted, not the others. 

“I’ll fuck you, you little brat. It’s hot to see you beg.” You smirked, nudging the tip of your cock over his hole, feeling every flex of his muscles. 

“You’re all talk and no-oh! Mm…mm…Oh God, yes!” Rupert was ready to retort again, but you stunted him in his arrogance by gliding your solid cockhead into his weeping hole. He sucked you in, barely giving you time to register how hot and tight he was. You even had to hold his hips back, stopping him from completely bottoming out. If he did that immediately, you’d cum in seconds. No, you wanted to go slowly, feeling every inch of his fervid walls dripping with your saliva. But you had to be careful thinking about that too, your sensitivity was soaring. 

“Rupert…oh fuck..” You lost your composure for a second, finally letting Rupert engulf the rest of your length inside him. There was a slight mound just above your cock, and grazing it left both of you breathless. Rupert didn’t seem to care about his temperament anymore, fiercely fisting his cock whenever you pushed against that tight space. Your balls were starting to tighten, but you ignored them smacking against Rupert’s ass as you started to plunge your cock inside him. His walls were contracting already, and the harsh squeeze set your body on fire. 

“Ah…Ah…no, not yet!” Rupert cursed quietly to himself, confirming your suspicions when his hand came away wet. 

“Oh baby, you came already? Aww.” You decided to make fun of him a little, but it was done in good spirit. Rupert grumbled and pulled away from you, rolling over to face you. He was gorgeous, curls completely ruined and body covered in handprints. Even though he was spent, he looked at your solid cock curiously. 

“Have me again. But I want to see you this time.” Rupert mumbled grumpily, refusing to meet your eyes. You felt your eyebrow quirk at his statement, but you absolutely wanted to be inside him again. Throwing his legs over your shoulders he beckoned you back, throwing his head back in ecstasy when you found home again. Your hands found his, pressing him down into the bed as you thrust into him for the second time. Rupert made no attempt to hide his moans, almost goading you to go faster. You obeyed, hitting his prostate repeatedly until the bed creaked with your efforts. At a particularly rough thrust you reached down, needing to feel Rupert’s lips as you pounded him. Shockingly he kissed you back, wrapping his legs around your back. Your cock was straining now, desperate for a little more but chasing the need for release. Rupert cupped your face, licking the cut on your lip as you started to clench. 

“Why…why are you afraid to cum?” He asked, teasing your top lip. 

“Because…” Why were you afraid to cum? Was it because you knew you’d never see Rupert again? Because this was the best night of your life, and you’d be leaving at the end of the week? Because Rupert would never love you back, and he’d beat you up if you dared to tell anyone? It was all too much, and you were at risk of slowing down or even stopping. But the arrogant brat kissed you, and eased your worries with unusual tenderness. 

“Let yourself go. It’s you and me, right?” Rupert paused, feeling the beginning of your orgasm. As you shuddered and tensed through it, he helped you through the nerves, keeping you inside him. 

“It’s always been you. I know I’m stupid, but I…I can’t imagine life without you. I’m sorry.” Rupert sniffled, mouthing along your neck as you filled him with your essence. It took a while for your breathing to calm, but when it did, you pulled out and crushed your arms against him. You were both shaking, but you knew without a shred of doubt that you couldn’t leave him. His caresses were so soft now, all the bravado and ego shattering in a moment to hold you close. You absorbed him into your body, warm skin lightly brushing together in harmony as you shared the moment. But you experienced a moment of clarity, and in that, you knew exactly what you needed to do. 

Fuck Carol. I’m here to stay, bitch. 

Tagging in case you'd like to read: @grinningkatz (for the pretty pics ehehe), @lancedoncrimsonwings (I thought you'd like my British quips at the end for NT haha), @lord-aldhelm (would love your opinion) and obviously my usual amazing moots if you find this go wild <3

[tobyisave]

Omg hey! Thanks for taking the time to engage/share your thoughts even though you don't fully agree, I really appreciate it. And I don’t really disagree with you here, I just want to reply with my thoughts since you raised some interesting points!

Learned behaviors vs experiential gap: Absolutely the empathy/emotions thing is my weak link here, I'd call it a shameless projection that isn't necessarily supported by but consistent with canon lol. The only part I'd be reluctant to concede is the low empathy thing, but ultimately, an alternative interpretation where he's just really damn good at repressing is viable as well!

The learned behavior interpretation as you put it definitely makes sense, and I get the impression that it's more popular too. Kokichi's a really confusing guy and I think the interpretations we find most intuitive are probably going be the ones that relate his thought process to experiences we're familiar with, because that helps us grasp some semblance of humanity within him. All this to say I don't think there's anything that makes my explanation any better than yours; like you said, the truth is ambiguous, and I think it's best to gather as many different plausible interpretations as possible even if they don't lead to an "answer," because it lets us appreciate his writing and our relationship to our own interpretations. So I really appreciate you taking the time to put your version in words!

Gonta: On a similar note, I've basically lost hope that we'll ever know for certain what was going on in Kokichi's head here — and in spite of my giant footnote, I don't actually have a well-formed opinion myself — but I really like your point that his words gave Gonta peace of mind. Ironically I think I overlooked that angle because I didn't see a pragmatic reason to do anything solely for Gonta's benefit, since at this point Gonta's fate is sealed and his emotional state has no bearing on the future (aside from its effect on others, which has pretty much already maxed out with 'pity'). But consideration for the truth Gonta sees in his final moments makes total sense from the perspective of a Kokichi who's more emotionally 'typical,' and your interpretation is compelling; it gives more weight to the specific words he says, rather than just anything plausible to mislead people on why he's crying... I'll definitely have to think that over after this.

Paranoia: Another great point that I completely failed to address. I agree he's a little paranoid, or at least a reasonable amount of paranoid given the game they're in. Subbing that in as the cause of emotional disconnection in my analysis is really interesting... At the very least, I agree that paranoia would definitely add to the impression that these are all sham conversations. Though to confidently form an opinion on this I'd have to go back and look at the lies he tells in the killing game versus everyday life with that lens. My current impression is that his lying is too deeply ingrained to have developed situationally, so if I took his social detachment as a result of paranoia then I'd have to conclude that Kokichi is constantly paranoid. Which is not my opinion, but I'm sure it could be argued. In that case, in an everyday environment, the 'low empathy/emotion' version of Kokichi mostly neglects to tell people about himself because he doesn't care, while the 'learned behavior' + paranoia version actively avoids people knowing anything about him. Neither is an explanation of his lying per se, but the former would facilitate his compulsive lying, while the latter might not facilitate lying but does create a stronger motivation to lie.

Here and in other cases, I think a lot of the difference between these two headcanons just comes down to how good you think Kokichi is at acting and ignoring his emotions. 'Low empathy' Kokichi doesn't actually fight his instincts much, at least until shit really hits the fan, and that’s part of why that explanation appeals to me. Meanwhile 'learned behavior' Kokichi is frequently suppressing his instincts, successfully enough that I almost have trouble imagining someone being able to act that well (grain of salt, that’s *definitely* a blind spot for me - and more importantly, he is an Ultimate so I can’t put any kind of talent past him). My own reservations aside, the interpretation of Kokichi as someone naturally social who constantly has to fight his instincts definitely has its own merit; it’s emotionally compelling (in a pretty unique way that’s very different from mine) and probably more accessible as well.

Well, hope you didn't mind me writing an essay response to your response to my essay here lmao. I'm definitely starting to appreciate how challenging it is to figure this guy out; it's almost the opposite of the SDR2 problem, where Komaeda tells you his mindset from the get-go but the game never gives you a moment to recontextualize his actions after his death. V3 points at Kokichi and goes look, a mystery! we must recontextualize his actions! and then proceeds to give us basically nothing to go off of. All I can really aim to do is propose something with consistent internal logic, and I'm very glad if you think I managed to do that.

Again thanks for the rb, it's a treat to get such a long comment on my analysis!!

Character analysis: Why does Kokichi lie?

I think lying is more than just a means to an end for Kokichi, so this is my personal understanding of Kokichi's habitual lying, centered on the headcanon that he experiences his own emotions very weakly.

In a vain attempt to make this post more streamlined, I've isolated most textual examples into footnotes at the bottom; probably only read them if you don’t buy what I’m saying in the sentence prior. Lastly, if you disagree with something I say here and choose to make it known: probably read the footnotes first, and regardless please just be nice about it :')

"If I wanna become closer to Shuichi, I probably shouldn't lie so much... But that's my shtick... or more like, my way of life..." (Kokichi's inner thoughts from Salmon Team)

Small lies vs Big lies

To start this off, I need to clarify that there's (at least) two very different kinds of Kokichi lies. First are the “big” lies, like being the mastermind or lies about the nature of DICE. Big lies are consistent, told with a “straight face,” and well thought-out, because they usually serve some kind of strategic purpose [e.g. footnote 1]. But those aren't the kind of lies I'm aiming to explain here, because they're already well discussed and follow a pretty understandable logic.

I'm focusing on what I call "small" or compulsive lies: trivial claims & performed emotions that are usually not believed for long, either because they’re too outlandish or because he or someone else disproves them. For example, sobbing that he hates coffee and then asking for a cup of coffee; or telling the seance participants he's "actually super duper strong," despite knowing full well they're about to watch him struggle to carry the iron cage [more ex. in note 2]. Most of Kokichi's lies fall into this category imo, especially in low-stakes environments like Salmon Team and UTDP. Unlike big lies, "small" lies are somewhat unique to Kokichi, he tells/performs them constantly regardless of context, and they don’t serve a very clear purpose.

Masking

I think Kokichi got very good at performing emotions from a young age in order to mask the fact that he doesn't experience empathy or other emotions very strongly. And maybe that sounds like a very specific headcanon, but just stick with me here... [and/or see note 3 for one line of evidence]. Failing to emote convincingly would’ve not only made it difficult to exist in everyday society, but it probably would’ve put an even bigger target on his back as a criminal, too… So yeah, he learned.

But as it turns out, spending an (admittedly very short) lifetime pretending to have emotions you don’t actually have is a fantastic way to:

Start feeling detached from the people around you,

Start seeing everyone else as suckers for buying it, and

Very quickly lose any moral qualms about lying — after all, people would attack him from every direction if he was honest about his feelings towards them (or lack thereof), so how is it fair that they want to punish him for lying, too? There’s just no winning!

My interpretation boils down to this: Kokichi lies compulsively because he is deeply bored, and the kick he gets out of deceiving people is one of the only things he finds consistently rewarding about talking to them. Most social interactions already feel like lies to him because he is constantly forced to mask, so he might as well tell fun lies about being a supervillain instead of boring, easy lies about wanting to be friends with everyone.

(Continued under the cut)

Not all lies are strategic

I think it's easy to assume at first that the only reason to lie is for some sort of material influence: changing others' behavior or hiding undesirable truths, either for your own selfish gain or the greater good. Definitely, there is a purpose like that for most of Kokichi's "big" lies, and even some of his "small" ones (e.g. the kind of short-lived lies both he and Shuichi tell in order to advance the Class Trials). But even in retrospect, not every lie he tells can be explained with an external motivation like that, selfish OR unselfish.

I think telling "small" lies is more of a habit for Kokichi than a strategic choice, something he can't quit even when it becomes an actively bad strategy (hence "compulsive"). But if you’re already with me on this, feel free to just skip to the next section :P

A. Small lies aren't meant to be believed.

I don't think Kokichi tells lies in order to actually mislead people most of the time — because if he wanted people to believe his small lies, then he wouldn't be constantly retracting them. Many (or even most) of his small lies are soon followed up with “It’s a lie!”, either literally or by demonstrating/implying that it’s untrue [e.g. note 2 again]. [For some possible exceptions to this rule, see note 4].

Fig 1: Kokichi struggling not to give himself away after Monotarou believes his outlandish lie (V3 manga anthology). While I think this instance is a bit exaggerated, it nicely draws attention to the fact that he enjoys revealing his own lies.

By Kokichi's own doing, there is often a net 0 change in what people believe by the time they reach the end of a conversation with him. E.g. Kaede doesn't walk away from their FTE thinking Kokichi is her long-lost companion, Shuichi doesn't walk away from Salmon Team thinking Kokichi is obsessed with dumpster diving, etc. This suggests that Kokichi's not trying to change the perceived truth, he's just interested in the momentary act of tricking people.

B. Kokichi doesn’t tell small lies to alter his social standing, for better OR for worse.

I think the first half of this is self evident — I mean, if he was trying to gain status, he's doing a terrible job! He is aware of what behavior is required to make people like you and listen to you, and he is patently not doing that. 

You might then argue that he’s doing the opposite: intentionally bombing his reputation to build up to Ch.5 so that people would readily believe he’s the mastermind. While I do think his annoying lies ended up helping on that front, I don’t think his mastermind plan is the cause of this behavior, because...

Firstly, we still see him lie constantly in contexts where there's no clear advantage to being hated (UTDP, Salmon Team).

Secondly: Crying wolf is one of many great strategies to make people hate you... but it is a uniquely terrible strategy to make people believe you. If you were really going to create an evil mastermind persona out of thin air, "pretending to be a lying attention-seeker" is just not the most logical way to go about it; that would only make it harder for you to convince people that you're actually being serious when you do the big reveal that you're the mastermind [for a note on Junko, see 5]. That's why I don't think the compulsive liar thing is an act; instead the evil persona we see in game is just the result of leaning into traits people already disliked about him. The reason he tells so many meaningless small lies during the killing game is just that he already was, and is, a compulsive liar.

Again, there are some "big" lies, lies he doesn't go back on, that he tells in order to tank his reputation (e.g. "The more you suffer, the more I enjoy it"). But those big lies aren't enhanced at all by the fact that he walks around telling people the sky is green, you know? That might make people hate him, but it's not the wisest way to do so while still maintaining control over people.

Finally, regarding the argument that he tanks his credibility in order to mask his own emotions, see note [6].

So, with all that said... Why even tell these lies, if they don't give him more control over the situation, his classmates, or the truth?

Boredom

I believe Kokichi’s small lies are primarily driven by boredom. Yes, his complaints of boredom are probably meant to tie him to Junko (narratively) and justify enjoying the killing game. But I do think he’s also genuinely, chronically bored. Just because he doesn’t have vivid emotions doesn’t mean his brain isn’t expecting him to have vivid emotions, if that makes sense, so there’s just a constant lack of stimulus that leaves him restless.

On that note, I think it's difficult for him to maintain interest in everyday conversations. There's not usually a lot at stake for him, because he doesn't feel much about the people around him, and isn't interested in pretending that he does just so they can feel "connected" to a version of him that doesn't actually exist [but see 7].

It doesn't matter to him which path he takes when navigating everyday social interactions, so if he has to get through those interactions anyway, he's going to take the road less traveled. Pointing fingers, confessing to murder, and spontaneously bursting into tears… it’s not usually to accomplish anything in particular. It's more like doing backflips in an empty prison cell: equally as useless as rotting on the floor, but marginally more entertaining.

Fig 2: Kokichi consciously using lies to entertain himself. His dissatisfaction with the lie appears to be unrelated to whether or not it was believed; I suspect this is because the claim was so mundane that convincing Shuichi of it wouldn't have been very impressive in the first place.

But what's actually fun about lying?

I think this constant need for entertainment is what motivates a lot of Kokichi's social behaviors, not just lying. But he clearly has a special relationship with lies in particular. I think this is partially because of his perception of himself as "fake" (in the literal sense), but more importantly because lies are a versatile, challenging, and (relatively) harmless way to get reactions out of people.

Lying poses creative and intellectual challenges: Introducing lies basically doubles the amount of social calculations required to participate in conversation [elaboration in note 8].

Lying creates artificial stakes by reimagining ordinary conversations as competitions. By playing a game of "how many times can I fool this person in one sitting?" he creates an internal motivation to engage in conversation and perform social behaviors convincingly (at least, for short periods of time). External pressures like “being liked” aren’t usually enough to motivate that.

Lying allows him to emotionally occupy extreme scenarios without actually creating extreme scenarios. If he wants to raise tensions high enough that he can actually feel them, lying is one of the less destructive ways to do so, because it's entirely verbal (including body language, that is) and thus avoids material risk/harm. Now that's not to say it doesn't hurt people [e.g. note 9]. In fact, that's often the point; I wouldn't call him a sadist in the traditional sense, but there is something gratifying about triggering twinges of guilt and empathy in yourself if you don't normally have access to those feelings.

All this to say, Kokichi's habitual small lies aren't driven by a desire to create genuine misunderstandings, or to make people do what he wants [note 10]. I think what he actually seeks from social situations is little bursts of catharsis from witnessing other people’s emotions, and the feeling of control or "winning" that comes solely from being able to deceive them and get those reactions. 

Going "it's a lie!" right after is a really important part of this. It's a punchline, a tiny power trip, a kind of "Bingo!" he can use to declare victory. He doesn't necessarily want people to believe what he said, he just wants them to know that he totally got them and he'll do it again. Because what’s even the point of coming up with all these lies if people are just going to believe them and obliviously move on?

Lying as satire

Finally, and I’ll admit my thoughts on this aren’t quite as fleshed out, but I almost imagine Kokichi's lies as a form of satire, given that one of the few things he seems genuinely (?) passionate about is his right to lie. That is to say, it means something to him, in addition to being internally rewarding. He's had to present a false persona of himself from day one, after all — but now that he's a self-proclaimed bad guy, there's a lot less pressure to do it well. Performing those social behaviors in random, nonsensical patterns, and telling lies that feel just as true as the "honest conversation" he's learned to fake... it's like a form of indignant social button-mashing. It doesn't really matter if his performance conveys a coherent image of a person or not, because it was always arbitrary to him in the first place, you know?

….And I think I'm just going to stop myself there before this gets any longer. Tysm for reading!!!! <3

Disclaimer

…Actually that was a lie, let me get on my soapbox real quick. I think it's safe to say this essay hinges on Kokichi having some form of neurodivergence, however you want to label it. Personally I see him as having some antisocial traits, but I didn’t want to make that a silver bullet, and I thought it’d make more sense to just take the specific traits I see in him and work backwards from there. With that in mind, I want to make it abundantly clear that I don’t mean to assign any moral value to emotions. I can’t say this headcanon is entirely based on my own experiences, but there's a reason I connect with it, and I don't think anyone should be judged or labeled inhuman for emotions they do or do not have.

Moreover, while I explicitly take the stance that his emotions are morally neutral, I am explicitly NOT taking a stance on the morality of his behaviors. My intention here was just to explain them logically. Between you and me, just trust that I'm a Kokichi enjoyer and I did my best to consider things from his perspective.

Credits

Game screencaps from justonegamr and JakkHearts on Youtube. Manga screencap from Mangadex.

I also want to plug this analysis by @/g0nta-g0kuhara — I'm honestly not sure how much of my analysis aligns with/borrows from theirs, but it's definitely one of the posts that informs my current understanding of Kokichi, so it'd feel weird not to at least mention it. Consider giving it a read!

Finally, shout out to @thedaythatwas for peer reviewing this meta!!

Footnotes

These were mostly off the top of my head, so if I got anything wrong, feel free to (again, nicely) point it out ^^;

 “Big lies serve a strategic purpose” Big lies are also what I'd call the "normal" type of lies, just like Maki's Child Caregiver lie, or Komaeda's fake bomb threat — they're meant to be believed and to influence people's decisions. Examples of Kokichi's "big lies": those he tells in order to impersonate the Mastermind (e.g. claiming he loves the killing game); lies to Miu (being oblivious to her murder plot) and Gonta (believing the Killing Game Busters is a good idea) for his Ch.4 scheme, and debatably DICE lies to protect himself and his Ultimate title (though for these I also think he just gets a kick out of trying to juggle such a big lie for so long).

“Small lies” An example of an "emotional" small lie is the times he bursts out crying; he's not necessarily making false claims, but his actions communicate feelings he doesn't have, and most of the time he'll follow up by reverting to a bored expression thus implicitly confessing to the lie. His claim that he can’t taste food is also a pretty good example of a verbal lie: it’s random, difficult to believe, and he immediately follows it up by saying he likes sweet and spicy things. (That last part was definitely intended to imply he was lying, but whether or not he was lying about lying depends on your hc… I personally choose to believe that he has a weak sense of taste and relies on “interesting” textures like carbonation, because I think it parallels my take on his reduced emotions in a fun way.) +++ For further examples, the majority of Kokichi's Salmon Team events are just him spouting random bullshit and then immediately taking it back.

"One line of evidence for reduced empathy/emotions": His thought process often reads to me like someone with low empathy; and his ability to rapidly switch between extreme emotional performances and total flatness suggests that, in his natural form, his internal reactions are either dull or don’t automatically reflect on his face. For example, when Kokichi "gets real" during trials, his expression often goes blank and he comes off as overly blunt/pragmatic (“Everything you said is total BS… You didn't give two shits about Tenko when she was alive." "How do you expect to find the culprit when you're all worried about each other's feelings?" "Why do you guys hate lies so much? […] And some of them are only white lies, or lies to be kind to people…") They're delivered flatly (voice/sprites, and phrasing to a lesser extent) and express frustration with people's hypocrisy around social norms. To me these are moments when he gets so fed up with the social dance taking everyone in circles that he has to step out for a second and drop the mask, even knowing that his true self will make people see him as inhuman. (I probably shouldn’t have to clarify, but for the record I say all this as someone with low empathy myself.) +++++ALSO: I want to credit @/g0nta-g0kuhara's meta for pointing out that Kokichi's expression goes flat in (different) honest moments - linked in credits above - although I ultimately interpret this in a slightly different way for his character.

"Some exceptions to the 'it's a lie' rule": His own thoughts and feelings, which are often kept ambiguous. Lies he doesn't need to retract because they're obviously false ("I hate liars!" or "I was born from the big tree behind Hope's Peak Academy..."). Small *non-compulsive* lies that serve a strategic purpose, like perjury to further the trials (though you could argue these too are "obviously false" and basically retract themselves after a moment of critical thinking; e.g. claiming he killed Angie (ch3), or debatably telling Himiko she mentioned the brick handrail (ch4) because he intentionally casts doubt over the lie by telling it very badly). And of course, he doesn't go back on his "big" lies or the lies that serve to support them.

“Compulsive lying isn’t the best way to impersonate the mastermind”: Although I think his lying is very connected to his boredom, and his boredom connects him to Junko Enoshima, I want to point out that he is unaware of Junko. To the viewers of Danganronpa 53, his behavior absolutely looks like the behavior of a mastermind… but there’s no reason for Kokichi himself to think that “someone pathologically bored who constantly switches personas” is the most believable caricature of the mastermind. I think that’s a coincidence that was engineered by Tsumugi, and from Kokichi’s perspective it’s just part of his personality.

"Tanking his credibility to mask his emotions": As some have pointed out, being constantly dishonest does make it easier for Kokichi to dismiss his own moments of vulnerability and keep his thoughts/feelings ambiguous (e.g. gracefully backing out of his love confession to Shuichi during the love suite by pretending he was joking. The idea that it's a prank is only believable to Shuichi because he already knows Kokichi likes to pull his leg in other ways). I don't disagree with this interpretation of Kokichi's lies, in fact it's a really fascinating angle and part of what makes interpreting him so challenging. However... I still don't think that's the ONLY reason he walks around telling people the sky is green. Its usefulness is pretty limited to cases like the love suite, where he's trying to 'test the waters' and back out if the first approach fails. A superficially similar example is when he cries for Gonta's execution and then whirls around with whole "I don't want to, stupidhead!" bit — he's not actually testing the waters here, because he never intended to go forward with the story 'I'm really sad about Gonta and I regret doing that;' even if you think the tears were real, the plan was always to retract it. What actually saves face for him here is the fact that he's able to stop crying and go on a straight-faced villain monologue afterwards — and all that was *required* to make that believable was his acting skills (admittedly helped by his "evil" reputation, but not necessarily by his "liar" reputation). In other words, I'm inclined to think it would have worked even if he had presented as 'honest but mean-spirited' up until this point. It's the same way Tsumugi can convince us in Ch.6 that she's evil and her grief for previous victims was an act, despite never having presented herself as a liar until now; Kokichi is lying about being a heartless villain, while Tsumugi (ostensibly) is not, but they have the same effect in the moment because their ability to switch rapidly between 'good' and 'evil' personas proves *in itself* that they're good actors, and that one of those personas must be false, regardless of how their honesty was perceived beforehand.

"Kokichi lacks emotional stake in other people": This is simply a headcanon I am positing because I think it has interesting implications for his relationship with lies. Please don't be mistaken when I say that Kokichi doesn't care about the people around him (all of the English words for "caring" are frustratingly ambiguous, in my opinion). I don't think Kokichi experiences "care" as an emotion very often, no, but that doesn't mean he can't take interest in people, have opinions on them, or "care about" them through his actions. Now, whether or not he actually does that.... is not the topic of this essay either!

"An intellectual challenge": To lie, you have to continually generate a false narrative (rather than just regurgitating the truth), you have to track which routes you've left open based on what you've already said, and you have to assess whether or not they believe you (...which are all similar to calculations you'd already be used to doing if you don't have empathy). If you want to win, you have to do all of this on the fly and do it really, really well. And once people know you're a liar, it not only gets harder to convince them of your lies, it also gets harder to convince them of the truth; once lies are introduced, the pressure to perform well pervades every part of the conversation. Of course, this is way more fun with bigger lies (like DICE lies, in my opinion), but the little ones still take a modest amount of effort (an amount he can afford to expend on a daily basis) and yield a much more immediate reward.

"Lying still hurts people": e.g. Kokichi accuses Kaede of strong arming everyone during the Death Road of Despair, then accuses everyone else of attacking her the following morning. This one is a complicated example because it was such an obvious lie that I really have trouble believing that he wanted anyone else to buy it (I really think the point was to annoy people and raise social tensions), but even though the lie was quickly pointed out, it still actually made everyone gang up on Kaede, to the point she leaves to cry in her room afterwards.

“Lying isn’t to make people do what he wants”: Again, I'm just talking about his everyday compulsive lying here. While he does use DICE related lies to make people do what he wants (e.g. make Shuichi hang out with him), I consider those part of his "big schemes" rather than his habitual behavior, since his claims about DICE are consistent, well thought-out, and long term. Not to mention, the veracity of those claims isn't too important to me, since he's already very transparent about the fact that he's trying to threaten people into doing his bidding in these cases.

[yellowlikelemons]

Can we please go out in the woods and play wounded deer and hunter