#and then with the working today

[gaydelgard]

if you are the type of person to tell a girl to stop driving around with an adult sized plastic skeleton strapped into the backseat of her car do not imagine even for one second that you could ever score a girl who would drive around with an adult sized plastic skeleton in the backseat of her car

[brainrotcharacters]

When irl pisses me off, I rewatch the Honda Odyssey scene to relax

[oflights]

the main problem with this time of year is the irresistible urge to get fully into bed at like 5:34 pm and outside is like yesss, yesss do it, it's what you deserve yesss. like is it depression or is it just november

[frownyalfred]

thinking about the expert masseuse Alfred hired for the family that is paid a small fortune annually to provide massage services and ignore so, so many things. No questions, no remarks, just quality service and an ironclad NDA that, if broken, would probably topple said masseuse’s entire family line.

Things Alfred is paying them to ignore, in no specific order:

Bruce’s spinal hardware courtesy of Bane :)

weird amounts of muscle on everyone, even the kids (despite them allegedly not working physical jobs)

scars

FRESH scars

the fact that every joint in Bruce’s body clicks when moved/manipulated at the tender age of 42

Olympic athlete level physiques

rotator cuff injuries across the whole family

scars that are definitely from bullets and/or acid splashes

old signs of what looks like torture (Bruce)

Dick’s entire left arm is basically screws and plates (he “fell really bad” once)

every single family member takes deep tissue massage with max pressure with 0 complaints

calluses

no really, the weirdest fucking calluses

[nouverx]

You gotta excuse his 1920's ass, he's still learning slangs

[shiny-eyed-corvid]

going absolutely feral over this collection of items that washed up on Cornish beaches Lego Lost At Sea on twitter

[beidak-art]

Attack on @plaiesancier 🚢

[notherpuppet]

📻🍎✋♥️

[valtsv]

as someone who has been beaten and drowned and shot and stabbed and strangled and trampled and

[suzume-mana]

I drew that thing. Yeah.

[palatinewolfsblog]

"Being rude is easy. It does not take any effort and is a sign of weakness and insecurity. Kindness shows great self-discipline and strong self-esteem. Being kind is not always easy when dealing with rude people. Kindness is a sign of a person who has done a lot of personal work and has come to a great self-understanding and wisdom. Choose to be kind over being right, and you’ll be right every time because kindness is a sign of strength." U.N. Owen.

[morganbritton132]

AU where Tim, age nine, walked three miles to his neighbor’s house, held up his bleeding hand to Alfred, and asked if he could please have a bandaid. He got stitches instead, and a hug from Dick, who squeezed him tight and asked, “Can we keep him?”

And then Tim never went home again.

He learns gymnastics with Dick and reads in the library with Jason. He shows Alfred how to reset the wifi and rambles on to Bruce about his latest obsession (shipwrecks), and he never sees his parents again.

Behind the scenes, there was a kid left alone in a mansion while a whole international incident played out. It included a kidnapping, a ransom, a failed hostage negotiation, and two dead parents never coming home.

It pokes at a wound in Bruce when he is told about the Drakes and he has always been productive in tragedy. He knows how to shove the hurt away and build something strong on top of it.

The adoption was seamless. The sell of the Drake Estate was effortless. The trust for Tim. The memorial. The scholarships in Jack and Janet’s names. Bruce does it all methodical and singleminded.

And somewhere. Somehow. They forget to tell Tim.

Sometimes he misses his mom and dad. He misses his old room and being alone in a big house, but months turn to years and he likes it here. He really does. He has brothers here and Alfred, and they say they’re his family. He likes that.

They said they wanted to keep him, so they kept him. Kept him forever.

Then Damian is there.

Tim comes home and there’s a new boy, about the age he was when they got him. Tim asks in a whisper, “Did they take you too?”

[podcastwizard]

despite popular belief i'm perfactly fine

[pineau-noir]

Tonight's offering is sensory deprivation!

And I cannot stress how little plot there is. It's a negative amount of plot lol

Guess what????

I'm doing Kinktober!

...and for another fandom lol?

Anyway, find the master post HERE and all the days will be under the cut

List by absurdthirst

October 1: Hand Jobs

October 2: Voyeurism

October 3: Pet Play

[butyouaremymess]

LNC: Penelope Bridgerton (inspo) / [Colin version]

[nonbinary-octopus]

if you got an additional line of income that guaranteed your basic needs would be met, (notes below)

notes:

- the money can come from whatever source you'd like to imagine. UBI, sugar daddy, magically delivered in unmarked bills onto your dining table overnight by elves, blackmailing jeff bezos, wherever

- it will keep coming indefinitely

- basic needs: housing, food, medical care, clothes, a bit of disposable income, etc. You would not be rich, but you would have enough. It will rise with inflation and such, to have the same purchasing power as before, and will cover you and your dependents

- any money you earn at your job (or anywhere) is on top of the basic needs money. How much you get is not affected by how much you make elsewhere

- vacation doesn’t necessarily mean you go anywhere; you just don't need to go to work