#and then when i upload to tumblr and look at it on my laptop or phone its

[thisistab]

Is it comfortable? Or just what you're used to?

[darewolfcreates]

Teeth jars!

[kyeomblr]

why do my gifs look so crusty and ugly when i upload them to tumblr did something change w the new post editor 😭😭

[arthur-side]

How low maintenance are tomatoes???

Cuz mine survived a f cking typhoon and looks healthy af

[faintlyof]

Oh ew, I just noticed that the the -whole- bar that has a persons url in it in reblogs now takes you to their page. and also the whole thing highlights on hover.

was clicking/tapping the letters too difficult? like now im going to accidentally be opening randos blogs up constantly. which also, yeah, if im clicking on the persons blog from within the reblog, i want to see the POST on THEIR blog, im not here to fuck around and scroll back for 20 years trying to find it just because i need to cut someone out of the reblog chain before i send it to a friend???

and if i get to the post and then want to see their blog, easy. click home or whatever theyve called their main page or whatever

but like ive already accidentally opened like 5 different blogs and its been like 2 minutes,im tired

[linaliteracy]

If you only knew... pt. 1

Pairing: Banchan x y/n (she/her)

This is my 1st fanfi c on Tumblr! English is not my first language.

Summary: Where Bangchan watches all your moves on social media but is too scared to do something.

💐

Bangchan knew your instagram. You were a close friend of the guys, so it made sense for him to follow you with his finsta.

He liked watching your highlighted stories and enjoyed them even more when he was in them. In the special highlight that you had names "happy times🧸"

He was eager to watch new stories or a new post you uploaded. He knew that you enjoyed taking pictures and that you were insecure sometimes, so he wouldn't miss the chance to comment that you look stunning. He enjoyed it so much, especially when you answered with an emoji or with an internal joke you guys had.

One day, Han saw him watching your stories. Both were sitting on the sofa of the studio, waiting for the rest of the guys so they could follow with the recording session.

"Aren't those from last year?" He asked curious, peeking over Chan's shoulder. He quickly turned of the phone and looked at Han.

"No. Those are new. You just didn't see them"

"You are lying. You were stalking her," Han pointed a finger, and Chan just dismissed him. That made Han laugh, and the other guys appeared. Bangchan looked at Han with daggers in his eyes so the secret would stay that way, secret.

Chan relaxed around Han. He would look at your profile when he was around until the question popped out.

"You like y/n, right?"

It was late at night and both were at the studio, so Chan saw no point in denying it, it was late and he needed to vent about his crush.

"She is just so beautiful" he sighed "But don't tell anyone, Han. I just..."

"What if she likes you?" He inquired with a smirk.

"What do you mean? "

"I could ask her, you know" he kept writing something on his laptop, as if he hadn't just given Chan the greatest but most childish opportunity in the world.

"I should tell her and find out by myself. It's more fun that way."

"Good to know, because she just sent you a message" Han pointed at the phone and there it was.

y/n🩷: a funny thing just happened

y/n🩷: *voicemail*

"You even have her with a heart." Han punched him while laughing. "You are lost, man"

And Bangchan knew. He was lost and really liked you, but he wouldn't want it any other way.

[chaeneuu]

moodboard tuto pls? like how to do the layouts

     𐙚⠀͡  moodboard layout tutorial  ੭ ꒱

  hii i'm not sure if you mean the layout of the actual moodboard or the

 text in it that goes in between the images so i'll do a short tutorial of both ^^

      let me know if you have any questions afer reading this :')

          moodboard tutorial

    when i make my moodboards, i follow a simple process :

• look on pinterest for an icon you like and want to use in the moodboard

• after you find the icon you want to use, make note of the most significant colors in the image and what aesthetic / theme you want the moodboard to convey

• then, go back to pinterest and search for those colors and themes - i would do this by inputting [ color ] [ color ] [ adjective ] [ aesthetic ] into the search bar and scrolling through the results to find images you like and you think will fit the moodboard.

ex. white pink soft aesthetic or soft white pink aesthetic ( you can add as many colors as you'd like, it just might be a little harder to find good results )

• after i find the images i like, i try to arrange the moodboard on my laptop's desktop but you can use whatever you want to experiment with the arrangement of the images.

• when i'm satisfied with the arrangement i've made, i upload the images to tumblr and copy the same arrangement.

• you can choose to end here and upload / post the moodboard as it is, or you can add dividers or locs ( symbol layouts ) which will be the tutorial below !

            locs tutorial

making locs is pretty simple, all you need to do is find symbols to match the aesthetic you're aiming for with your moodboard and then arrange them in an eye-catching and reasonable way. you should also try to make it look balanced, however some locs look great even if it's a little unbalanced.

i usually search pretty symbols or cute symbols to find symbols to use and here's a short version of my process for making my locs :')

let's say i want to make a layout that gives off cutesy vibes, here are a few symbols i think would look cute if arranged together :

  ♡ﾟ    𐔌    ⏖    𐦯    𓏸    𓄹 𓄼

after i find the symbols i want to use, i experiment with different arrangements. here's the one i made and felt satisfied with :

   𓄹     ♡ﾟ     ⏖𓏸     𓄼     ⌢

      ( this is how it would be spaced out in a moodboard )

as you can see, i got rid of some of the symbols i originally chose and added a new one. i also combined two of the symbols but that's not required, i just thought i'd give it a try lol :')

you can also make a set of locs for one moodboard if you want there to be more of a variety but that's completely up to you ^_^

that's it for this tutorial, lmk if you have any questions and tysm for sending this ask !

 

𐙚⠀͡  i hope this tutorial helped everyone who needed it !  ੭ ꒱

 

[meruz]

i hope this hasn't been asked before. what size do you make your canvas? and do you crop it to fit other socials (like Instagram for example)? i hear that 300 dpi is standard. i never know if it's good to make my canvas big or not.

hi i think this ask is like at least 4 months old but i was scanning my sketchbooks from last year and i abruptly remembered i had gotten this ask because i had made a little chart in my sketchbook trying to figure out how to answer it

anyways theres pros and cons. and the size of your canvas is really going to depend on personal needs + preference. how good ur computer is, how complicated ur art style, how comfortable drawing feels, how much disk space you have to spare, what youre gonna end up using the art for in the end...300dpi is standard for PRINTING specifically, if you only plan to ever post things online then 72dpi works great and will save you space (fun fact a lot of professional animation files i deal with are 72dpi. and those eventually go on your tv screen). but personally i make everything i draw 300dpi because i am always printing stuff for cons, zines, etc and its nice to have the option even if i dont end up printing.

when I was a teen I used to draw on a rly shitty laptop and i made everything 800x800px 300dpi because big canvases would cause a lot of lag and also the resolution on this laptop was pretty small so 800px was a lot of the screen already. now i have a slightly better laptop with a bigger resolution and i sketch on giant 10000px-40000px canvases with the hard round brush and no shape dynamics or transfer whatsoever to minimize lag. when it comes to making a final illustration when i know ill be using a bunch of layer effects/blending modes/colors/mixing brushes etc etc ill generally crop the canvas down to the 6000px range. most illustrations i try to make sure are comfortably printable on tabloid size paper so thats pretty much anything hovering around or above 3000x5000px w 300dpi (so 11x17in). HOPE THIS HELPS?

EDIT: OH ALSO re: socials. i always ALWAYS size down my art to post on the internet. i think its crazy when other artists dont. because why would i ever let the internet have my hi-res file for free. also in general i think it looks better if you do the resizing yourself because if you don't then many social media sites will compress your file for you! a lot of people will post a hi-res file to twitter and then go "Wow twitter killed the quality of this img!!!" UH YEAH because they have an automatic image compressor. because they need to save space too lol and they dont want your image to take 248263895 years to load. same with instagram and to a lesser extent tumblr. when i post anything on social media i resize it down to 1200px-1600px on the longest side... its a little arbitrary but im kind of basing it on the smallest resolution of widely available screens. mostly because i think it looks stupid when u open up an image file fullsize and u have to scroll to see the whole thing... also iirc instagram only takes images up to 1080px before it resizes them? granted if you upload something smaller than that itll also resize it up which will look worse so I think bumping the numbers just over 1080px is pretty safe.

I should really be bringing the dpi down to 72 too when i post online but often im too lazy to do that. but it will technically help ur image load faster and stuff. and make it less likely for people to yoink it off the web and print it themselves.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Feral | JJK One Shot

Summary: Jungkook comes back from his Global Citizen Festival and tells you something funny that happened to him. Pairing: Jungkook x f!Reader | Established Relationship, idol!au Word Count: 2.5k~ Warnings: Explicit language and mature themes, mentions of bdsm, sub space and pet play A/N: Hey guys this is my first One Shot that I've uploaded to Tumblr and I'm scared but excited to see what you think. My asks and DMs are open if you have any feedback or just wanna say hi! A big thank you to @trina864 for helping me and encouraging me to start posting on here. Hopefully I'll be coming back with more fics very soon! P.s. Horribly edited so please excuse any errors

"Did you get to watch my performance tonight?" Jungkook asks, bright eyed and bushy tailed walking into our hotel room. I look at him with a pained expression "I'm sorry baby I really wanted to but I had an early morning meeting to talk about this big case we've been working on" I explain apologetically. "Oh" he deflates, sad that I wasn't watching. "That's okay, I know how hard you've been working lately, I understand" he says nodding his head, coming over to the bed to sit next to me and see what I'm working on. He acknowledges all the sleepless nights I've been having, and no matter how much he tries to get me to come to bed, I never listen. Most early mornings he finds me sleeping on my desk having passed out from exhaustion and he picks me up and brings me to bed to get at least a few comfortable hours of rest. 

"You wanna know something funny that happened today?" he says with a toothy grin. I hum in acknowledgement and close my laptop taking a break to give him my full undivided attention. "After one of my songs today I took my inner ear out because I could hear Army chanting something and I wanted to try to understand but I couldn't. So I asked them to do it a bit louder and I guess they were barking at me. Like 'woof woof woof woof'. It happened to me before when I was on Good Morning America and I wasn't really sure what it meant but it looked like they were having fun so I think that would mean it's a good thing right?" he says with an amused expression. "Yes Jungkook it's a good thing" I say giggling at his confusion. "So what does that mean when they bark at me?" he says looking at me and tilting his head at me just like Bam does to him. 

I take a few seconds to think about it but for the life of me I can't really seem to put it into words without making it even more confusing for myself. "Um, well I guess the basic thing that it means if they think you're really hot, like beyond hot" I start. "So sexy?" he says encouraging me to continue. "Yeah pretty much and have you ever really heard the expression of 'going wild' over something?" I ask. "Yeah?" he says dragging it out starting to understand the action a little bit more but still showing some confusion. "Well it's pretty much based on that among other things. Another thing people say is 'going feral' with is like beyond going crazy like when dogs are like foaming at the mouth" I say brining up an extreme example trying to help him get the picture. "You mean like when they have rabies?" he says now thoroughly amused. "I mean kinda but not really" I say tilting my head from from side to side a few times.

"One more thing I could think to link it to would be something a little on... well a little on the explicit side" I say cringing at having to explain this one. "Explicit? Army? Noooo!" he says laughing knowing damn well he has been showing a more explicit side of himself lately, amused that Army is following suit. "You're familiar with some basic concepts of bdsm right?" I say feeling a bit awkward bringing it up. "Well... yeah we've kind dabbled in it a little bit right?" he says with a smirk and poking my side" I flinch a bit at it and laugh nervously "Yeah but anyways, have you heard about pet play?" I ask hoping that I won't have to explain it too much. He tilts his his head up towards the ceiling in thought trying to remember if he's heard anything about it but comes up empty handed. "Mmm can't say that I have" he says and waits expectantly for my continued explanation. 

"Basically it kind of links to a degradation kink, you know when a person gets aroused by getting humiliated. You know, stuff like that" he nods his head showing me he's trying to follow. "So they are saying, well not all of them but I'm sure some of them are thinking this. But they are saying that they want you to degrade them and put a leash on them and treat them like they’re your pet and you can do as you please with them" I say cringing at the fact that I have to have to have this sort of conversation to begin with. "Uh huh" he says feeling slightly uncomfortable but still rather amused. "I mean you're hot so I'm not surprised that people are ready to submit to you like that. "Like you do" he says now dropping his voice an octave, making me shudder. "We're not talking about me right now" I say laughing it off, getting off the bed and putting some distance between us. Jungkook swings his legs over the edge of the bed and stares at me with a hunger in his eyes that had not been there moments ago. 

"Well why not? We're already on the subject, why not continue?" he says leaning his arms back on the bed and spreading his legs. "Because we're talking about your fans, you know Army?" I say continuing to back away from him until I hit a wall. "I don't want to talk about Army anymore, I spent some time with them today so now I want to spend some time with you" he says purposely toying with me, pushing all the right buttons. I let out a slight whimper not knowing how else to respond. "It's been a while since we tried something new hasn't it?" he says sitting up a bit. "Would you like to be my pet? Let me do whatever I want with you? I already know you like it when I call you names. What has been your favorite one recently? Slut? Whore? Bitch?" I whimper again while squeezing my thighs together. "Ah that's right, how fitting, would you like it if I put a leash on you, and let everyone see what a dirty little bitch you are for me? Make you crawl to me? I might even make you drink out of a bowl like the pretty little bitch you are. But wait that might be something you would enjoy. Would you like that pup?" he says waiting for my answer. 

I start to respond but he holds his hand up cutting me off. "Aww look at that, my dumb pup forgot that dogs don't talk. Now try again love, bark once for yes and twice for no" I squirm in place not sure exactly how to respond since the thought of it does intrigue me and I can't lie when I say that I can feel myself getting wet. He raises his brow at me waiting for me to respond and I finally decide to let out one little bark under my breath while hanging my head in shame. "I'm sorry pup what was that? I couldn't quite hear you?" I let out another bark in response now feeling my cheeks starting to heat up. "One more time for me, just a little bit louder. Do you want to be my dumb little pup? My bitch? Poor baby has made up her mind but is too embarrassed to bark. Come on, just a little louder. "Woof" I finally respond loud and clear this time, hoping he won't make me do it again. 

"Aw there we go. Looks like you aren't the dumb little bitch I thought you were. Puppy was just too shy to admit she wants me to play with her". I breathe out hoping he'll stop there but he decides to continue. "On all fours, now" he orders. This I can do, and I've done it multiple times without question when he has me in this sub space that I've been tipped over in. "Good girl" he says with a tone of voice he reserves for when he talks to Bam. For not knowing what this is he seems like quite the natural. "Baby come" he says ordering me to come to his side. I wince at the thought of me crawling over to him and he notices my hesitance, "Aw looks like my dumb little bitch still needs training. Puppy come here" he says in a more playful tone. I decide to surrender this time and crawl over to him and see his eyes rake over my body with a expression that I have never seen before but it makes me feel nervous but sexy. Once I sit in front of him I see him play with his lip rings and then rest on biting his lip for a second just gazing down on me. 

"You did so well love" he says cupping my face in his hand and rubbing his thumb over the apple of my cheek praising me for all that I've done. "You can come out if you want to" he says gently, coaxing me out of my sub space. I blink a few times and reach up to place my hand on top of his and he gives me soft smile, "There she is" he says and he looks down at me lovingly, "Looks like you really enjoyed that" he says helping me stand up. "You're one to talk" I say rubbing my aching knees that I only now just noticed. "Speaking of which you seemed like you're quite a natural for someone who isn't familiar with pet play" I say suspiciously. "Yeah about that..." he says trailing off. "Jeon Jungkook did you lie to me?" I say feeling utterly betrayed. "I'm sorry but you just looked super shy I just had to watch you explain it to me" he says pulling me onto his lap. I burry my face in the crook of his neck to hide my reddening face. 

"You're so mean"I mumble, "Aw come on you know I love you, plus look at you, you're my adorable little pup who listened so well" he says rubbing my back. I sit up and look at him, "But I thought I was your bitch" I say with a roll of my eyes. "That too, but you're my cute puppy first and foremost" he says ruffling my hair. "Hey! Don't do that!" I whine fixing it, "We're not playing like that anymore". "Alright alright, I'll stop. We can pick this up later" he says giving me a quick kiss on my cheek and placing me on the bed walking over to his bag on the floor. "Huh" I scoff, "What makes you think I wanna do that again?" I say crossing my arms over my chest. "Do I really need to see how much of a mess you've made down there right now?" my eyes widen at his words and I cross my legs in response. "Exactly" he laughs pulling out his laptop and his phone, walking over to the small couch in the corner. 

"What are you doing?" I ask curiously watching him prop up his phone. "I'm gonna go on live for a bit to check up on Army to see their reaction, especially since I dropped the teaser for 3D" he says with a smile. "You dropped it at the festival? Wow I can imagine the screams, especially after seeing their reaction to the proof teaser at your last concert in the US" I say shaking my head and smiling at the thought. "Yeah I'm even more excited to release it now!" he says feeling proud of himself. "You and Jack worked really hard on it so I'm sure they're gonna love it. Let's be real, if you just recoded a whole three minutes worth of you just breathing everyone would go crazy over it. That's basically what Hobi did in Jack in the Box right?" I finish laughing. He let's out a chuckle in response, "Yeah you're right, I'm sure it's gonna be great! Are you gonna go shower?" He asks watching me grab some stuff out of my bag. "Yeah I definitely need one, my back is killing me after having to sit in front of my computer all night. 

"Okay wait for me and I'll join you in a bit yeah?" he says with a sly smile. "You better hurry up then mister, I'm not taking a three hour shower because you're still on live" I say remembering the nights he would stay up talking to and spending time with Army. "Okay just give me like 15 minutes" he begs. I laugh and start to walk over to the bathroom but he calls out to me. "Wait!" I turn around at the sound of him, "Can I have a kiss?" he says with a pout, to which I can't help but agree to. I give him a kiss and he deepens it and he promises between kisses that he'll give me a massage to entice me into really waiting for him. I nod my head and roll my eyes and turn to walk to bathroom to which he responds with a loud slap on my ass. "Hey!" I yell back scolding him, but he puts up his finger to his lips as he presses the button to go live telling me to stay quiet. I huff silently and close the door behind me and start the shower and hear him make excuses for the noise.

"Oh I think it's just the sound of someone taking a shower next door. Yeah it's loud huh? I guess the walls are pretty thin here. Oh! Jin! Jin Hyung!" I hear him continue, sounding excited at what I could only think is the sight of Jin commenting on the live. Smiling I get into the shower and let the warm water wash away all the stress from the day until I hear a slight jiggle of the door nob. "Ya! Woman open the door!" I laugh at his pleading and leave him there complaining for a while before letting him in. "Oops" I say "I guess I forgot" I finish, feigning innocence. "Uh huh, you forgot" he says rolling his eyes at me and giving me another slap on the ass. "Just get back in the shower" he says and I give him a kiss before doing just that. 'Tonight is gonna be a long night' I think to myself as I bite my lip standing under the stream of water, waiting for him to join me.

Join my Taglist!

[chrizztopher97]

WARNING: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Idol!Chan, Fan!FemReader, swearing, oral, piv, unprotected sex, breast play, praise, name calling.

It has been a day ever since you went to Stray Kids tour date in Seoul and you just couldn't get Chan's solo stage off your mind.

You were sitting in the park with your laptop on the picnic table, one tab playing over and over the HD video they uploaded not long after the concert you experienced and the image of him stripping the jacket off of himself while staring right your way just kept on popping on.

You knew he was just staring blankly but just the idea of him taking off his clothes while looking right into your eyes made you fold in half.

Unable to resist it, you started writing a smut but all you could write was a scene of you begging and pleading, asking him to suck him off, begging him to fuck you in every way possible.

Lost in your own imagination you visioned everything you wrote and as the image of him entering you from the side, lying down on your bed while he held your leg up with his face buried in your neck you jumped on the bench and took your face in your hands.

"I'm definitely out of my mind..." You exasperated as you started deleting the entire line.

"Hey hey, I'm still reading." A voice mumbled from behind your shoulder making you turn around before closing the laptop.

Tumblr will save it for you anyways.

"When.. what.. why?" You could only ask as he, the main thought of your sinful thoughts was pouting at your action.

"I've been here ever since you started writing it." He mumbled sitting next to you, "as for the what, I was kinda curious since you typed so fast while listening on repeat to my song." his eyes looked at you and you could see a faint smirk on his lips. "As for the reason, well you kept on repeating my name over and over so I just came."

Pointing at the now closed laptop, he chuckled. "Well, not yet."

"I don't know if I should apologise for writing such things about you or be mad at your teasing..." You whined as you sat on the bench.

"I think you should apologise..." He mumbled making your heart stop and the realisation of doing something bad hitting you. "for not continuing and almost deleting the entire thing." He whispered taking the laptop.

The need to fight back to get it back was there but a part of you wanted to know what he liked just by him reading your scenarios.

"Just don't mind me and continue." He said passing the laptop to your way.

"You-" Taking a deep breath you unlocked the pc and bit your lip. "but don't get all sensitive later." You mumbled.

Closing your eyes for a moment was enough to let your own thoughts flow from your head, envisioning it in the back of your eyelids, to finally flow in your fingers.

A scene of you on your knees begging to suck him off while he looked down at you, your fingers trembled as you typed.

The Y/N of that one story was you and you wanted to write all the things you craved. Every single thing you wanted him to do to you.

Writing about how you wanted him to hold your head, massaging your scalp while you took all of him deep down your throat.

Noting down the way you wanted him to manhandle you, hold you by the hips while he kissed you so passionately.

As if you forgot where you were, a soft whimper escaped your lips as your breathing became unstable and shaky. Your thighs pressed together while in your eyes you could see everything so clearly.

Him holding you in his arms while you rode him, you calling his name over and over, pleading him to love you, begging for his existence.

"Fuck." You gasped standing up and retracting from your seat but an arm sneaked behind you, holding you still.

Almost forcing you to sit back down and so you did. How could you not when he was right there, beside you. Reading straight into your mind.

Your naked thoughts revealed to him. Your soul completely exposed while your heart busted inside your chest, begging for his love and attention.

"Go on." He whispered in your ear.

That's when you finally lost it. Your sanity disappeared making you write something you've never thought you would ever.

Exposing your own preference in bed as you wrote a scene where he railed you over and over, you begging for more, clinging onto him for dear life as you screamed over and over 'more'.

Describing how he held you down, kissing you everywhere, indulging you in the sweetest sinful pleasure between two souls. His hands all over you, his hard length slipping in and out of you with squelching noises while your throbbing core clamped down on him, your hands grabbing every part of him, your nails digging in his skin as he pressed deeper and harder.

A railway of emotions washed over you as you felt yourself nearing an orgasm by solely imagine the scene.

Completing the page, you bit down on your lip and saved it as a draft before turning off the laptop and look down.

"I think it's best if I go at home..." You mumbled as you stood up slowly.

He hummed in response standing up and grabbing your laptop case before grabbing your stuff and look at you. "I'll walk you home."

Looking up to him you shook your head. God knows what you would have done to him if you were near your apartment.

"There's no need." Was all you could say even if you craved more of his company.

"It's late." He just said, his head loaming above yours as if to engulf you in his presence.

═══════☆♡☆═══════

As you stood in front of your apartment door, you grabbed your laptop and held it in your arms. Feeling your legs weak, you leaned onto the wall as you stared at him.

Wanting to engrave in your memory the way his face looked up close before he'd disappear from your life as if you've never even met.

Engraving the way his eyes stared at you, the way his parted lips shaped the form of a heart, the way his breathing sounded shallow, the way that hoodie enveloped his toned chest.

Oh... how bad you had it for him. You already knew that you'd miss him already.

"What's your username on tumblr?" His voice came out so softly.

It felt as if you've heard him only in your head.

"Chrizztopher97..." You whispered shyly.

Noting it down on his phone, he tossed it inside his pocket once again before coming closer, his body a few inches from yours as he stared down at you.

The way his body engulfed you making you disappear from sight, just that was enough to make the butterflies fly all around your body.

"Sweet dreams..." He whispered leaning in to plant a caste kiss on your forehead before taking a couple of steps back.

"You too..." Your heart fluttered at the way his soft lips felt on your skin yet it left a burning feeling lingering there.

Smiling softly you looked at him for a moment before unlocking your door and enter the apartment. Leaving all your stuff at the door, without shoes you went back outside hoping he was still there and thankfully he was.

"Christopher." You stopped in front of the elevator. "Stay with me," you pleaded as you looked at him. "please."

Walking out of the elevator, he took a step then another and another until you found yourself trapped against your door. "Want me to stay?" He whispered as his eyes gazed right into yours.

Nodding as you lost yourself in his eyes, you heard the door unlock and his voice softened. "Forgive me, I saw the code..." He whispered before holding you by the hips and pushing the door open.

His body heaving as he breathed shakily, his feet stumbling on each other just to get rid of his own shoes. His foot kicking the door shut before he walked blindly with you as the source of his eyes.

"What shall I do to you, hmm?" His words ringed in your ears as he leaned over.

His lips a few inches from yours.

"Kiss me, please..." Your voice trembled as all you wanted was him.

All of him.

There, the throbbing feeling, that shaky and ragged breathing you had whenever you were about to faint yet, it was all because you craved for him.

Without saying anything he let his lips touch yours in a soft motion, a simple peck stamped on your lips before looking at you for a moment and let loose.

His lips now finally locked with yours in a slow, intimate kiss. His hands moving behind your back, pushing you closer to him as the both of you indulged in a marvellous kiss that made the tender feeling turn into pure hunger.

Your hands rested around the nape of his neck, slowly taking off his beanie and tossing it somewhere in the living room before letting your hands bury themselves in the lock of his soft curls.

His hand slowly moving down the curve of your back, cupping the ass cheek softly yet tightly. Making the first sinful sound escape your lips and flow into his mouth making a muffled grunt come out.

"Up." Was all he needed to say for you to understand what he wanted.

Jumping in his arms, he held onto your ass and sat onto the couch with you on his lap.

Heated and with trembling hands you reached the edge of his hoodie. Slowly sneaking your hand on his stomach, tracing the lines of his abs, grazing it lightly with your nails.

Head on cloud nine as your tongues swirled around each other, his plush lips pressed on yours while unholy moans escaped both your mouths, gulping each other's breath down.

Out of breath, you rested your forehead on his. Eyes closed as you took in the scent of him, his cologne now lingering on your shirt.

"Give me your hands." He whispered softly as he leaned back.

Without objecting you obeyed.

Taking your hands in his, he kissed your fingers before cupping his cheeks with your hands.

With softened eyes you smiled. He might have looked very appetizing after that heated kiss, but he still looked so adorable.

Tracing the outline of his lips, you leaned in to steal a kiss. "Can I do this?" You questioned, eyes half lidded as you stole more kisses.

He didn't answer, he just let you do what you wanted.

He was now breathing shallowly, as if to calm himself.

Kissing his lips over and over, you let yourself loose. Lips trailing on his neck, softly biting on his skin making him grip tight on your butt. Your hands moved down, feeling his body over the soft material of his sweatshirt.

Lifting it slowly, you looked at him for approval and with a kiss on your cheek he sighed and helped you get rid of it.

Gulping down at the sight of his bare torso, you bit down on your lip before throwing the hoodie somewhere and kiss his skin. From his neck to his shoulder, making sure to not leave marks on him. Just to not get him in trouble.

Slowly getting up from his lap, you leaned in to kiss behind his ear before going down on your knees, his prominent bulge facing your eyes.

"Can I suck you off?" You whispered softly as you ran your hands up his legs and along his thighs, reaching for the waistband of his shorts.

"Want me?" He breathed as he took your hands and curved your fingers around the waistband, pulling it down.

Eyes locked on his, you got rid of everything he was wearing.

His hand trailed along your arm, reaching your head he massaged your scalp and smiled. "All yours."

Licking your lips you moved your hands on his thighs as you kissed the soft skin of his inner thigh before slowly moving in the middle.

Letting out a soft chuckle you looked up to him. "First the chest and now the dick... I've definitely lived this moment before..." You mumbled before taking his erection in your hand.

Slowly stroking him you kissed the leaking head, licking slowly and tasting his precum. The pineapple definitely worked on him.

Looking up into his eyes you started taking his cock in your mouth, stuffing yourself full of him, slowly moving your head as you sucked him deliciously.

"Pretty, if you keep it like this I might explode in your mouth..." He huffed as he jerked his hips against your head.

"Hmm." Stuffed with him you gently took his balls and massaged them as you deepthroated him.

"Shit, baby girl..." He moaned as he took a hold of your hair in his hand, pushing himself further.

Jerking his hips he slipped his hardness inside your mouth, your tongue wetting his length as he slid in and out until he reached his high. Pulling out of your face, spurts of cum hit your flushed face.

"Oh Gosh." He breathed looking at you, leaning in to steal a kiss. "Should have known by the way you wrote that page." He chuckled standing up. "You want me desperately to the point that everything you've imagined so far has trained you to be my good girl."

Taking your hands he made you stand up. Removing your shirt, he unclasped the bra effortlessly before burying his face between your breasts. "Where's your room?" He asked patting your ass as if to make you jump in his arms.

"On the right." You huffed, the feeling of his lips kissing your soft skin made you shiver.

Humming in response, he walked following your instructions. Door opened and the bed welcoming the both of you, wishing you a beautiful and sinful night of pure bliss.

Falling onto the mattress he hovered over you, his chest heaving as he kissed your exposed skin over and over, biting and leaving marks on your skin.

Fingers buried in his hair you gently tugged at his hair making his erection twitch against your leg.

"You guessed it right." He whispered as he removed your shorts slowly, tossing them away. "I do have a kink for my girl pleading and begging to have me."

"Lord have mercy..." You whined as he kissed the sensitive skin of your inner thigh before burying his face on your cunt.

Tongue dipped in your slick hole, licking stripes of your wetness making him grunt in approval. "Taste so good... hmm..."

Rolling your eyes, your back arched and he took the chance to put the small pillow under the curve of your back before focusing back on his task. Eating you.

He ate you as if he starved all his life, he starved as if he has been waiting for you all these years.

Lips brushing between your outer lips, making out shamelessly with your cunt, muffling incoherent sweet praises as he sucked on your clit while one of his hands cupped your tit, playing with both nipples. The other kept your folds open as he kissed you and licked you sloppily.

Head over heels, head in the clouds you came unannounced, coating his mouth and chin with your slickness.

"Chris... please I need you..." You pleaded tugging at his hair gently.

"I'm here." He whispered while kissing up your body, reaching for your lips.

With a hand he caressed your body, your breasts, your stomach, your hip, your thigh, your leg. His lips remained on yours as he moved between your legs.

His hand reaching for your folds, sinking two of his fingers in with ease. "Is it the slickness or are you completely comfortable with me?" He asked kissing your cheek.

"Both." You smiled as he kissed your forehead.

"With no protection though..." He mumbled looking around your room.

"I haven't had sex in years." You mumbled looking away. "And I've been going to the gynaecologist every month." Your hands moved on his back. "I'm clean and I trust you in cumming outside."

"Next time I'll make sure to get condoms..." He mumbled widening your legs more before diving in.

A gasp escaped both your lips as he pushed deeper inside you. His twitching erection finally inside your long waiting cunt, welcoming him like a velvet glove.

"You're such a beauty." He smiled kissing your face as his hips jerked in and out, his cock dipping in and out of you with squelching noises.

"You're the most handsome guy I've ever met." You smiled as you played with his hair.

"I'm not even that hand-" He started speaking but you cut him off with a kiss.

"Shut it. Never say that ever again." You mumbled indulging into a slow kiss which he gladly accepted.

It didn't take long for him to lose all his restraint and start being vocal about how good you felt, how good he wanted to fuck you, how beautiful and sexy you were.

He was so lost in you to the point that after cumming and making a heart shaped puddle on your stomach, he let you suck him off a few times before diving back inside of your wet core.

Lying on the side, he pulled up your leg and thrusted inside of you slowly yet deeply. The rhythm being in good harmony with your moany breathings.

Hickeys resting on your skin as you fought against the need of marking him yours.

"Is it too late to admit something?" He asked as he pressed himself deeper before moving once again.

Looking behind at him, a slight fear came over you.

"I don't have a girlfriend and I am genuinely loving this." He huffed. "And that's for the record." He poked your hip.

"You made me almost have a heart attack." You whined placing a hand over your chest.

Sneaking his hand up from your clit, he rested his hand on yours. "I did stare at you when I was doing the solo stage."

Biting your neck softly before nibbling on your earlobe, he smiled. "You were the only one who was actually looking at me and not filming me."

"Because I needed to experience that strip tease and needed full focus." You joked as you swayed your hips to encounter his thrusts.

"I'm pretty sure you also mouthed me a 'fuck me, please'." He teased as he slipped out and got on his knees before cumming on your chest.

"With all those lights, you saw that?" You questioned in disbelief as he brought his fingers in his mouth before inserting them in your core.

Finger-fucking you, he looked down at you and smirked. "Also you're really easy to read."

Furrowing your brows, he hit that sweet spot making your legs tremble and fall loose as you came all over his hand.

"Especially if you keep on looking at me as if you'd give me all of you." He chuckled leaning in to plant a kiss on your lips. "I'll get something to clean you."

Sucking on his fingers he smiled to himself before standing up and going for the bathroom. Not long after he came with a water bottle and a wash cloth.

After cleaning your body, he gave you some water before wrapping his arms around your body.

Exhaustion finally kicking in as he melt in your embrace.

"Remember to give me your number before I go tomorrow." He whispered kissing your forehead.

His fingers massaging your scalp as he kissed your face. Smiling you nodded before kissing him over and over.

"Raw feels good though..." You pouted making him look at you dumbfounded and then chuckling.

"Bet you have some breeding kink." He giggled hugging you tightly.

"I have a severe Bang Chan breeding me kink." You admitted which made him burst out in laughter.

"Guess I'll need to fuck some sense into you." He mumbled shaking his head.

Kissing his chest you just stroke your nose on his soft pec before kissing it and dozing off.

"You adorable thing." He whispered before falling asleep himself.

[asparklethatisblue]

Why won’t tumblr let me upload more than one video clip, my laptop is broken, I can’t paste them together, and I need visuals for my ineloquent “The power dynamics aboard HMS Erebus are odd before Sir John dies” ramble. Because in episode 1 alone there’s at least three scenes where someone asks Graham Gore a question or gives him a command (usually Sir John), and he looks at Fitzjames, who makes one clear deliberate nod or wordless encouragement, and only then does Graham do whatever was asked. He is not the only one, Dr Stanley physically turns away from Sir John to speak to James when Silna and her father are brought aboard. All this while Sir John clearly is the leader of the expedition, the most senior officer in general rank and actual position. Yes James is the Captain of Erebus, but Sir John technically is more so. There might be more, all of it was wordless on James’ part, and contrary to what you people might think, I don’t ONLY look at him while watching

anyway, here’s the one I noticed relatively recently:

[thatdesklamp]

Hello, and (for the moment) ‘see you in a while’ from old desklamp.

(Quick edit now I’ve written this all out: Oh, lordie—I’ve just realised that this sounds like I’m announcing I’m giving up on IW. I’m not! I promise. This is all about how I’m trying to facilitate my writing process. IW is not being dropped: let’s get that out of the way first, lmao.)

Hello all! I’ve been doing some self-reflecting, and I’ve come up with this: I’ve struggled with writing ‘Intrinsic Warmth’ for a long time now.

Alll too often I’ve been sat with my laptop for hours having only managed to squeeze out one or two paragraphs that I don’t even like all that much anyway. I haven’t felt satisfied by writing for a long time, and so I just haven’t written anything. It’s been months since I’ve written something worth reading for IW, and I’ve been having a think as to why.

I think it comes down to two things; I’ve been feeling a lot of pressure in writing IW, and I’ve become too fixated on the instant gratification of feedback from you guys.

First: the pressure. IW has gotten bigger than I ever considered it would be, especially recently (as in, in the jjk season 2 era). The support and feedback continues to blow me away, and I’m staggered every time I stop to actually consider the magnitude of the response that IW has gotten. It’s genuinely crazy.

All that is to say: I wasn’t prepared for this!! I don’t mean that in any resentful way at all, I want to be clear. Moreso that it’s easy to feel a bit overwhelmed by it all. I know that, relative to other huge ao3 fics, IW isn’t even that huge. But I also recognise that in the ‘Gojo x reader scene’, it’s pretty up there, even if we’re just looking through a ‘filter by most kudos’-ed fic angle. There’s a been big response, and I’m just one person, lmao. But come on, I absolutely love it, and I’m so grateful that people have enjoyed the stuff I’m writing—but as more and more people have been picking it up I’ve felt a definite pressure put upon me. It’s a pressure to write well, and to write more, and to write good things more often. This isn’t to do with anything anyone’s said, don’t worry, but more as an expected consequence of IW picking up traction.

I feel more and more like a ‘popular author’, and feel like I’m doing you guys a disservice with my infrequent updates. I truly do appreciate the reassurance of ‘you can update whenever you want!’, genuinely, but I’m also an ao3 reader myself! I empathise with and understand the frustration that must be felt when I go months between updates. Writing has never come at the expense of my personal, academic or social life (hence why I’ve never tried to tie myself down with an update schedule: I’d never be able to keep to it), and I’d never want it to. I want to keep writing as it’s always been: one of my hobbies. But as IW increases in popularity, it feels like it almost *should* take priority over other things, and this has left me feeling pretty overwhelmed.

My second reason: I’ve also become a tad too dependent on feedback. When IW was in its fledgling stages, I didn’t show it to anyone at all, and was ‘writing for myself’ in the barest sense of the phrase. Only one of my irl friends has read any of it, and when I was first uploading it, when I had about 5ish comments per chapter, any feedback I was getting would always be secondary to my own. I was writing for myself, because I enjoyed writing and I enjoyed what I was writing about, and it just so happened that there were a few people who felt the same as me.

It’s very different now! And I much prefer it now—it’s every writer’s dream to have had such an overwhelmingly positive response to their writing. And now it gets to the point where I can check my emails, or look at my tumblr notifications, and there’ll always be new for me. And whilst I absolutely love this, it’s pretty addictive, checking again and again, seeing what people are saying. This positive response from others is more instantly gratifying than the slow, steady, personal enjoyment I get from writing.

It sounds silly, I know, but I’ve been writing this hunger games fic (completely spontaneous, likely never to be published), and no-one’s read it but me, and it’s reminded me how much I really do like writing. I’ve loved the process of writing it, because the only person whose opinion I’m listening to is my own.

I don’t want to discourage people from reaching out to me, leaving comments, even talking about IW, anything like that. That’s not what I mean. But this is me recognising that I should probably take a step back from the non-writing side of writing: being active on tumblr, constantly checking asks, making posts, etc. Know that whilst I may not immediately respond to you, once I get back in the swing of things over here, I will do. I just need to sort out my personal priorities a bit, I think.

Saying this, I know I haven’t been all that active recently (this has honestly been intentional: I’ve been trying to wean myself off it, lmao) but for the immediate future, I’m making that more definite: I’m going to try to revert my focus to writing. I’m going to stay off tumblr for a bit, until I’ve gotten back into the swing of writing and don’t find myself so focused on the feedback side of it all. Hopefully this’ll spark up some more genuine passion in me! Please know that if you’ve written an ao3 comment, I have read it. I don’t know when I will respond to them, but I definitely will, I just want to keep my focus on the personal side of writing for the moment.

Thank you to everyone! Again, this is just me going off the grid for a while: not a big fuckoff goodbye or anything. If this is unreasonably theatrical, blame my drama GCSE. Going off to do some writing now. See you guys!

[cantwritethetword]

Biceps? Really?

Fic Descript: Superman finds out Batman has a very odd ticklish spot, and of course has to tease Bruce half to death over it.

~A/N  - HELLO ONCE AGAIN

Look at me being somewhat consistent with uploads SDJFHKALSDFJHKH amazing what meds can do

I've had these requests in my inbox for aaaaaages (im so sorry) and I feel like I can finally write something for them.

Prompts were:

Please excuse the typos and the "it's ok that this will be s(H)ort" cause that was back when I was like super burnt out AND unmedicated lmao so I was like OH JUST A LIL FIC YOU CAN DO IT but this will be a proper one lmao

Also lmao forgive me for the super boring title I couldn't think of another one.

EDIT: ALSO AGSKAGSKAGD ILL HAVE IT BE KNOWN I USE DARK MODE ON MOBILE THIS WAS ON MY LAPTOP AND IDK HOW TO GET TUMBLR TO BE DARK MODE ON LAPTOP HENCE THE WHITE SCREENSHOTS THANK YOU THAT IS ALL

- Enoy! ~

Tag List: @constanteyeburn

Masterpost Link 

"I still..." Bruce huffed as he lay on the floor, glaring at his partner. "Don't get... why you're still so surprised... every time we do this."

Clark, the absolute puppy dog, was still beaming after launching yet another random tickle attack on Bruce. Since first discovering the Batman's hilarious (and quite frankly adorable) little weakness, it was like crack for Clark. Any time he had the opportunity, he launched himself at Bruce and just started squeezing. And, because Bruce was just that damn ticklish, the poor superhero couldn't last ten seconds before crumbling into a flood of chuckles.

"I don't know." Clark grinned. "You don't seem like the ticklish type, is all. Never have."

Bruce rolled his eyes, before starting to stand up. "I am not the ticklish type."

"Uh, oh yes you are!" Clark laughed, reaching to grab Bruce's arm. "And where do you think you're going?"

Normally, Bruce's response to this would be a swift bat (hehe) at Clark's hand to push it away from him as he stood, and an even swifter escape before Clark decided to go for round 2 (it had happened before, and Bruce swore he would've passed out if Clark hadn't taken pity on him).

But this time, whatever way Clark grabbed Bruce's arm, sent electric shivers coursing down Bruce's side. Bruce let out a yelp, and half-collapsed onto one knee.

Clark gasped, his face like a kid on Christmas morning. "No way."

"Clark." Bruce's eye's widened as he pieced together what had just happened. "That wasn't-"

"Wasn't what?" Clark interjected, pulling Bruce closer to him using the aforementioned grabbed bicep.

The tugging motion pressed Clark's fingers right into Bruce's muscle again, forcing a symphony of strange noises, squeaks, and choked laughs out of the absolutely screwed superhero. As Bruce fell, Clark expertly manoeuvered him onto his back (for the second time that day) so that Clark could kneel on his forearms.

"What the hell Kent?" Bruce grunted, pulling his tough-guy facade over his currently anxious and flustered self. "Let me go."

Clark chuckled. "Oh no, we're investigating this."

Bruce cursed under his breath. He remembered Clark's methodical tickle monster days all too well. When Superman himself had him pinned to the floor with no hope of escape, and took his sweet ass time tracing and prodding with various numbers of fingers on any tickle spot that came to mind.

This time would be no different. Clark began with his thumbs, massaging small circles into the very center of Bruce's muscle.

And holy fuck did it tickle.

Bruce's entire torso tried to lift itself off the floor for a moment, his eyes wide in shock at just how bad it was, before his body slammed back onto the floor and flailed. His legs kicked a ticklish drum beat as the highest pitched giggle either man had ever heard escaped his lips.

"Wow you're ticklish here!" Clark laughed over the noise. "I can't believe this is even possible!"

"SHUTUP!" Bruce shouted between bouts of hysterics, twisting his hips from side to side to alleviate the torturous sensations.

"Seriously though," Clark continued as if nothing was even happening. "Ticklish biceps? You've got to be kidding me."

"CLARK!"

Superman nodded to himself, resting his hands on his thighs. "You're right, you're right, it's time to move on to something else."

Bruce gulped in mouthfuls of air before registering what Clark was implying. "No-... wait-..."

Ten feather-light fingernails touched down right above Bruce's armpit and paused for a moment, soaking in the anticipation. Clark didn't have a chance to start moving before Bruce broke into deep streams of laughter.

"Really, Batman?" Clark taunted. "Breaking that easily?"

"Fuhuhuck ohoff."

Superman rolled his eyes, before trailing down Bruce's biceps from elbow to underarm. That singular smooth movement upped Bruce's laughter by a few pitches, a good sign for what was to come.

Clark lifted his hands and reset them back to their starting position on Bruce's arm, before letting his fingers begin their descent once more.

Except this time, each finger took its turn to softly trace up a few inches before lifting and straightening again while his wrist moved further to Bruce's elbow. Like two gliding spiders, Clark's hands pulled downright squeals from Bruce.

"NOHO!" The Batman pleaded. "I CAHAN'T- CAHAN'T TAKE IHIT!"

Smirking, Clark tutted. "Oh come on, you're usually so tough!"

But, now that he thought about it, Bruce was rather red by this point (and not just from sheer embarrassment). And while it certainly was fun tormenting the usually far too stoic superhero, the fun could wait for another day.

Clark wasn't forgetting about this any time soon.

[quills-of-freedom]

Crossroads Chapter V

I can only apologise for the lateness of this, my ask box is flooded with requests. (Thank you for your interest) It started with burnout, then my laptop broke, then I was busy (I still am really) and this year I've lost family members and just all round been a time where Tumblr isn't my main priority. Thank you for understanding 💓

Previous Chapters:

I

II

III & IV

Warnings: Angst, a lot of it. Smut, fluff, violence.

Kinks:

Praise kink. Whining pathetic Reiner. Breeding kink.

Reiner

If your choice is Reiner, continue reading. If it's Porco, you'll find it here when it's uploaded.

No cheating!

The chokehold you've been placed in wasn't a pleasant one, both men gazing at you longingly, their eyes pleading for you to make the right choice, to pick them over the other. Can't you see they are the one that loves you? The one person who truly would do anything for your heart. The other choice is evidently the wrong decision, for the opposition could not possibly admire you as much as they do.

With a tightness in your throat you take a step away from Porco and towards Reiner; the breaking of Porco's heart was almost audible from where you were standing, his hand immediately flying over his chest to cover his new deep wound.

"I'm sorry, Porco..." your strained vocals press. "There's just so much I need to know that only Reiner has the answer to. We can catch up later, okay?"

"No, yeah..." He whispers, his head nod/shake exaggerated by his shell shock. His eyes seem to be looking right through you, not at you, as they become glazed with sorrow. "I uh... I understand. Just... look after her, okay?" His gaze snaps over to Reiner, whose deep frown is prominent.

"Of course." Reiner nods in reply as you take another side step towards him.

"I'm so sorry, Porco..." you repeat, the guilt so heavy you could barely stand.

"Don't be." He croaked, forcing a smile.

"Come on." Reiner ushers you to his side turning to take you further into the Forest. "We got a lot to talk about."

Your head nods curtly, following the broad-shouldered man into the treeline. You're sure you made the right choice. The questions running around your head every night, haunting you, why did Reiner do this? Why did he do that? Was it all a lie? They had to stop, for your own sanity. Breaking Porcos heart was collateral damage, unfortunately, but closure was what you needed to move forward. You glance back at the man who just saved your life as you step into the shaded trees; now sitting on the ground with his head in his hands. Your heart stings before the brush Reiner pushes aside for you springs back into place, covering the broken man from your view.

"Will he be okay?" You ask quietly, eyes glued to the floor as you stepped over thick shrubbery and fallen limbs of the trees.

"Yeah." Reiner mutters. "He's a good fighter."

"No, I mean-"

"I knew what you meant."

After a while of walking, Reiner finally is satisfied with a location for a temporary place to stay. The journey wasn't too long, but the heavy atmosphere made every second feel like a short eternity. Every footstep away from Porco's crumpled form was difficult, the desire to turn and run back to him was sometimes so strong it almost possessed you. But you remained focused, reminding yourself of why you'd chosen Reiner in the first place.

You watch the Blonde Warrior out of the corner of your eye as you help him set up camp. God's he hadn't really changed... physically anyway. Or had he? He looked a little older, his chest and shoulders a little broader. Maybe to shoulder the weight of the world he seemed to be carrying? But everything else was the same. His mannerisms, the way he carried himself as he strutted through the brush... reminding you of the first night you had spent together.

Feels like a lifetime ago...

The small huffs he was making as he rolled away a heavy log were the same noises he'd make during training. It was hard to believe everything had changed so much from that time. You close your eyes imagining you're back in time. This is just another training exercise Shadis has sent you all on.

Sasha, Connie and Jean arguing over who gets to avoid sleeping in the middle of their small tent.

Ymir and Historia cosied up by the fire.

Marco on his back gazing at the stars, eyes filled with childlike wonder.

Such simpler times...

Your throat tightens, hand forming into a fist as you breathe through this wave of emotion. Back then, Eren wasn't a mass murderer who has totally lost his sanity. Sasha hadn't been shot. Ymir hadn't been eaten by Porco. Marco wasn't killed by the man you're now standing with.

You picture the scene so vividly in your mind, you could almost hear the fire crackling, the burning musk of dampened wood filling your nose.

"You alright?"

Your eyes snap open.

That was an actual fire you could smell, freshly built by Reiner as he now started on the tent.

"Y-yeah."

Every fiber of your being, every cell in your body wished you could reach through the fabric of time to go back to those good old days, even if just for mere minutes.

The events of the last few years have taught you that hauntings are indeed real but they're all within yourself. Your heart twists and yearns for the company of ghosts who's presence you no longer felt.

Reiner has to really focus on the task at hand as he begins to put up the tent poles. The mirror image of your first time together. A tent in the woods and now... well now, he was sure one wrong move and you'd try to kill him. Again.

Last time was so nervous he fumbled, stuttered, and dropped equipment. Now he feels so empty. A glance into the past of the life he once had. Over the last four years he would have given anything to be able to see you, to touch you once more. And now he has that chance, he feels so unworthy he can hardly look at you.

But God were you still beautiful.

He walks by you to get another pole, not daring to ask you to pass it to him.

The sleepless nights, tossing and turning in a cold sweat from the thought of what could have been. But he couldn't abandon his mission, his comrades, his country - just because he fell in love with an island devil.

What he wouldn't give to smell your scent again. To hold you in his arms. Just one more chance. Please.

He walks back towards the tent when his hand accidenlty brushes against yours. It was only so slightly, both of your minds elsewhere. To have any spacial awareness in the tight clearing wasn't likely when both of your cognitive functionings had spluttered and stalled.

You both freeze.

Reiners eyes widen like he's just been electrocuted, his jaw tense.

You take the pole from him, your face beginning to smoulder with a coloured hue, taking it to the tent and finishing the job for him.

"I'm sorry." He grumbles behind you.

"Its no big deal."

You can't even turn to look at him, instead you focus upon your task. Now it's your turn to be nervous, to fumble and suddenly totally forget how to set up a tent, even though you'd done it a thousand times.

"No, y/n... im... I'm sorry."

You realise now he's not talking about accidently touching you.

You now turn to meet his gaze, silent tears pouring down his cheeks. All the regret, sorrow, frustration, guilt... its finally now able to release somewhat.

You don't know what to say.

You glance down, fiddling with the bamboo pole in your hand. You wanted your answers. Here they are for the taking.

So why can't I even look at him?!

Your eyes widen in sheer horror as Reiner Braun, the holder of the armoured titan, the man who caused so much death and destruction, falls to his knees before you, grabbing your hand and gazing up at you. Those honey eyes that had been witness to the atrocities he was capable of, now full of agony.

"Please, I know I don't deserve your forgiveness..." His words struggle through his sobs. "I wouldn't even ask for it. But I'd give anything for you to understand... why I did what I did... why we did what we did..." His mind flitters to Annie who was gods know where, and Beartoldt, poor Beartoldt, the timid and kind hearted boy who was dragged into this infernal hell - the boy so kind he couldn't even fully utilise the Colossals full power.

That knife that had been permanently wedged into your back since the reveal four years ago suddenly loosens at his words, the sight of him being such a sorry mess pulling your heart in ways you didn't expect.

You've been to Marley.

You infiltrated their way of life, and boy was it a sorry one.

Segregation, indoctrination, false histories, much like your own world- he gave his heart to his cause. He gave his heart to a lie.

Much like yourself.

Paradis wasn't full of witches and devil's. It was full of people just like his mother. His cousin. Like himself.

And even when he'd learned Paradis wasn't this realm of darkness he was led to believe, if he didn't finish what he started, his loved ones would surely suffer for it.

You sink to your knees along with him, not being able to bear how broken the man you love has become, your own tears shedding as you hold his face to ensure his teary gaze locked onto yours.

"I do, Reiner. I understand. I know what you've been through. We've seen your country. We're all a byproduct of this cruel world..." you take a deep breath, steadying yourself. "The only answer to hate and segregation, is love and acceptance. I forgive you, Reiner. I may not be able to forget... but I know now you were just doing what you had to do. Just like we were when we... attacked Liberio. Sort of... its... complicated. But you know that better than anyone, right?"

He nods, his eyes crumpling closed as he desperately leans into your touch, the one he's been longing for, for four years.

"But were we a lie? Did you mean what you said then? How you and beartoldt were dead... and it was all a lie?" Your tragic eyes blink at him.

Reiner places his head against yours. "No. We were real. I had to say that to convince myself... God, y/n if only you knew... this whole situation is just... bullshit."

You laugh softly.

Bit of an understatement, but yeah.

"And you..." Reiner then whispers, placing the side of his index finger under your chin. "How've you been holding up?" His eyes search yours, looking desperately for any sign that you still love him as he does you.

"I've just been... moving forward." You answer honestly, a phrase he'd often tell you in encouragement.

"That's my girl..." His voice almost a whisper.

You freeze at his words, wanting nothing more than for this stupid fighting to stop. His hand runs through your hair, his eyes gazing into your very soul.

"I've... missed you." He admits honestly, still pawing your hair. "I'd do anything to be able to have you in my arms again. I thought of you... every damn day for the last four years."

Your heart swells both with love and despair.

Fuck it.

You press your lips against his, immediately your senses bombarded with his familiar smell, taste and feel.

That little nudge was all he needed, his eyes closed with a pleading brow, holding your jaw delicately as if he would break you if he allowed himself to go at the pace he wanted. The whimper from his throat an indicator of his honesty that he had indeed, wished for this for a long time.

Your kiss deepens, his tongue smoothly sliding into your mouth, boldly entering as if it hadn't been away for years. He pushes you back gently, one large hand grabbing your thigh from your kneeling position, pulling it up to his hip as he lowers you with trembling arms. You swing your trapped leg free, more than happy to feel his weight between your hips once again as the hold on his self control begins to dwindle and falter, another, louder whimper sending heat surging through you.

You revel at the feeling of his hair between your fingers once again, and enjoying the new scratching sensation from his facial hair, as his mouth makes its way down your neck, slowly and yet also hurriedly at the same time. His quaking body holds back, a large paw pulling your shoulder stap down your arm as his mouth now trails to your chest.

Reiner had hungered for you for too long, and boy was he starving, his other large hand grabbing your ass cheek firmly, his hips slowly thrusting, looking for some sort of friction against you, something, anything. The pathetic whining puppy look turned you on if you were being honest with yourself.

"Let me have you again..." He pleads, face flushed already from this short interaction.

You're surprised at how quickly he's lost himself in the red haze but you weren't complaining.

"You're so perfect, so beautiful... please, y/n, let me feel your insides again... I'll do anything to make you feel good again... let me make you feel like you're floating... I wanna feel you cum around my cock..."

Your entirety burns at his words, your own red hue starting to develop under your cheeks. He'd certainly become more brazen over the years. Or maybe it was just sheer desperation? You didn't know, nor did you care as you nod to signal his permission.

A groan rumbles him as he pulls down your shirt with a roughened haste, his hot breath looking like titan steam as he gasps at your form, eyes heavy-lidded and predatory.

"Look at my princess..." He whispers in awe as he then pulls off his own shirt, quickly returning to your touch, those mere seconds far too long away from your skin. He grabs your breast, leaning down and placing it in his mouth, his other hand reaching between your legs, sliding his hand down your trousers and slowly rubbing you over your underwear. He groans at the warmth of you, your already dampening cloth an invitation for him to ruin you.

The testosterone soaring through his body made him think of how he'd almost lost this moment to Porco. Porco fuckin' Galliard. The loser who would touch himself at night thinking of you, images of you naked from Ymirs memories... well now he once again had the real thing.

Sucks to be you, Galliard.

And boy was Reiner going to prove to you that you'd made the right choice. Reiner already has the previous knowledge of where all of your sweet spots were and he was going to get them all. His mouth moves to your next erogenous zone all while slowly circling your main one through the soft fabric.

Your body is engulfed in flames, your lips parted in gasps, your fingers digging into the grass beneath you as Reiner assaults your senses with no mercy. You'll not receive an ounce of mercy either, his hungry mouth now moving to your next sweet spot, still humping at nothing.

You whisper his name in encouragement, a loud croaked whine from him as a reply.

He suddenly sits up, hair a mess, face flushed as he roughly pulls down your trousers throwing them carelessly to the side, his eyes not once leaving your form.

"I'm going to devour you..." He huffs, mostly to himself the force of him now yanking your panties down pulling you closer to him. "You belong to me and only me....I'll remind you of that."

He arches over you, unzipping himself free, that beautiful cock just as fat as you remembered with that delicious upward curve at the tip. It throbs and dances angrily, weeping with precum as he grabs the base of his shaft.

"I can't hold back any longer..." He breathes, looking into your eyes. "I won't last... I've needed you for too long."

"I don't care..." is your reply, your equally starved body more than ready for him.

He pushes himself in firmly but at a stress pace, the size of him always a tough pill for your insides to swallow. Your mouth hangs open at the sensation of his girth splitting you open so deliciously, your walls pushing and resisting him.

He cries out loudly, your tight insides snuggly protesting his invasion as they spasm, seemingly swallowing him whole yet pushing him out at the same time, like they can't decide what they want. But he knows what he wants, and with a final push, he was at the hilt.

He wastes no time, lifting up your leg and thrusting within you with feverish glee.

Your body can't seem to comprehend what was happening, your eyes closed in bliss, pleasure flowing through you and building up from each push of his form, that curved tip pushing against your G-spot and pleasure zones you'd forgotten you'd had, places only Reiners dick could stretch and reach.

With each movement, a loud groan or hiss sounded from the feral warrior, the wet, sloppy sounds music to his ears as you sing your song of pleasures.

"Shit... ah... all mine. Fuck, please... please don't make me wait this long again. This body feels so good... so perfect... baby... urgh I'm not gonna last... cum for me, sweetheart... I'm going to make you a mess..."

The words of filth from his mouth only add to your mounting pleasure, your body being the thing that has pushed him beyond his sanity.

Your nails sink into his back as he works you, your ability to speak has all but gone.

"Nurgh, harder..." He instructs. "Make me yours again... show me how good you feel right now."

You obey, sinking your nails harder into his back, his hiss of pleasure drowned out by the hiss of steam emitting from his small wounds as they heal.

"Again..." He moans.

You agree as he thrusts with more urgency knowing that the tightening of your insides meant he was pushing you towards your end.

"Good girl..." He smirks into your neck. "You're my good girl... cum for me..."

You gasp as you snap, your insides spasming and pulling him further into your orgasm. His loud groan fades away as everything goes black, your face numb as you're carried away to realms beyond your understanding.

You feel his thick liquid splatter against your cervix as you slowly fade back into your assigned dimension, your breath heaving as his spluttering cock is audible while it spews and vomits his seed into you. He collapses, grunting but he remains inside of you, the white sticky substance from his body leaking from you, his dick still as hard as it was when it first invaded your insides. You wince as he slowly begins thrusting again, your swollen and oversensitive cunt not yet ready for another assault.

"Gonna impregnate you..." He whispers with a smirk, somehow still not within his own mind. "You're gonna be all swollen with me... fill you right up... all big and full... URGH!"

You groan as you feel him pick up the pace. How is this even possible? Did he want you that much?

Your question is answered for you as he pushes your legs to your chest, the deep and full feeling almost too much as your sensitivity returns to pleasure.

"You've always taken me so well, princess..." He praises as he watches you with awe. "Such a good little pussy... so tight... all m-mine..."

You'd almost forgotten about his little kink of getting you all full of his seed but sure enough, he's quick to remind you as he continues to stuff himself as far into you as he'll go, his breathing hoarse and his groans even more so.

"R-reiner..." you gasp.

"Yeah baby... moan my name... I'll never get tired of hearing that..."

He plunges harder, the mess he's making down there evident as his balls and pubic bone are smeared with his thick load and your own wetness. It squelches and slides yet not once does your unbridled passion nor pleasure leave you.

"Look at me..." He orders, gazing into your very soul. "There's no way I'm letting you go again. You're mine. Say it."

"I..." you stammer through pleasure. "I'm y-yours Reiner. All yours..."

Satisfied, he plunges harder, the breath leaving your body as he partakes in self indulgence within you. His grunt of approval with your words loud and gruff, his focus on the last few pushes before your next orgasm.

"Shit, Reiner..." you curse as you swirl the drain, falling and tumbling into your second wave of bliss.

"Mmmm take my load...." He grunts as he cums again, maybe not as strong as the one he'd just had but just as sweet nonetheless.

He rolls off you, panting having pushed himself a little too far while his chest heaves. You immediately feel his hot goop spill out of you, the sheer amount of it surprising you. You knew he was capable of a huge load, but this?

He takes your hand, his gaze at the sky with a pained expression.

"I missed that..." His pants are heavy and laboured.

"Yeah... me too."

*

"Wait... what do you mean?" Armin whispers, eyes wide. "Are you... sure...? You can't be sure, right?"

"Tell me you're lying!" Mikasa screeches, grabbing Jean's coat with desperation.

"I'm sorry, you guys..." Jean's teeth clench, fighting and failing to hold in his sobs. "I saw it with my own eyes. She was eaten by the jaw titan. I couldn't get to her, I was flanked either side by Flochs flunkies... I'm sorry we couldn't rendezvous sooner, it was too dangerous. But yeah, that was a couple of hours ago now..."

Mikasa's legs tremble, Jean holding her arms to keep her steady as he continues; "When Eren finds out... I can't imagine this is going to help his current mental state, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who witnessed it."

Connie slumps to the floor - or rather the rooftop they were all standing on. "No... not another one... I cant... I can't keep doing this!"

"Come on guys..." Jean snarls through tears. "We still have plenty to do. She wouldn't want us putting our mission on the back-burner like this!"

His words are met with only sobbing as a reply.

"So they're here..." Armin ponders solemnly. "Which means -"

Their mourning is cut short as a huge explosion is heard, their automatic flinch and yelp of surprise now seeming like second nature as their ears are filled with a distant enraged roar.

Mikasa dabs her eyes, looking in the direction of the military building. "Looks like Eren has heard the news..."

Jean nods. "Come on, get it together! We gotta move!"

They all nod leaping into action, flying their ODM gear through the streets towards the plume of smoke, dust and titan steam.

Mikasa's thoughts race as she blasts towards another loud roar and smash. Maybe y/n managed to cut her way out? Please, anything but this. She can't lose anyone else...

She blinks away tears as she pulls herself up higher, the huge figure of Erens titan form now coming into view in the distance. She can already feel Eren slipping through her fingers, no matter how tightly she grasped. She couldn't lose you too.

Eren transforming has of course attracted all attention, Mikasa spotting another Jeagerist also heading towards the disruption. With a tug of her wires, she slings around the corner, blades raised and ready as the enemy spots her.

"He-!"

Before he could even finish his word her blade had sunken into his chest and removed again.

"Keep your eyes open!" She hears Jean yell. "They'll surely be more!"

"Its the Cart titan!" Armin calls down from up higher. "Its armed! It's got that artillery on its back!"

"Shit!" Jean hisses as they fly. "That thing cuts through us like paper mache!"

*

The plans gone to shit.

Porco thinks as his Titan form sprints through the town on all fours.

What's made Jeager expose himself like this?! Whatever the reason, I'm glad Magath is with Pieck up on the wall with the artillery. I hope Reiner heard the explosion, there's no way we can get word to him now.

His eyes spot a familiar figure, one of the Ackermans not too far away, also heading towards the attack titan. He gets poised, ready to attack when the image of you stabs into his head.

Shed be crushed if I killed her comrades. But... she made her choice. Right? Ackerman is a huge threat. I need to get rid of her now before she causes more trouble later.

He positions himself on a rooftop, titan eyes glaring and ready to pounce towards her in a sprint. It'll only take a couple of bounds before he's on top of her.

*

You sprint through the forest as fast as your legs can carry you, the thundering footsteps of the armoured sprinting pretty far ahead of you. You'd left your god damn ODM gear in that clearing Porco dropped you off in and Reiner in all his wisdom wanted you to get it yourself, the later you are to the fight, the better in his eyes.

You break through the clearing where Porco had released you from his mouth, the only sign of his previous presence the almost fully disintegrated titan corpse.

Your fingers fumble as you quickly grab your gear, glancing up and seeing Reiner leap over the top of the wall, disappearing with a huge crash on the other side. Your thoughts race as you attach your gear to your belt, working as fast as you possibly could to -

You freeze.

You heard a roar.

A different kind of roar.

One that filled the sky with static and a bright orange glow.

Zeke... he's... he's done it.

Deafening crashes emit in the distance, only pushing you to move faster. The amount of drills you've taken to get equipped as fast as possible didn't seem to have had any effect as each second felt like an eternity. You needed to be there. You needed to get there quickly. And even when you're done, it's a good run to the wall, nothing around you to sink your hooks into.

Finally ready, you break into your frantic sprint, your gear clinking loudly with your violent steps.

Please god, please... keep everyone safe... I just want this all to end...

Was that really Zekes scream? Had he done it? Turned everyone into a titan?!

*

"Keep em off him!" Mikasa screams as she zooms around and over Eren who is grappling with Reiner.

"There's titans everywhere!" Armin screeches. "Get the thunder spears ready! Take down the cart titans artillery!"

"Jean's taken down the Jaw!" Mikasa informs him as they zip towards the wall. "He saw it ready to pounce, but for whatever reason, it didn't."

"There's no time to ponder on details just now." Armin pants as they fly together. "Keep your focus on the job at hand."

"That goddamn monkey!" Jean curses from behind them. "He really did it... he's turned everyone who drank that wine into a titan!"

"Stay focused!" Armin reminds him. "Are you certain the jaw is down?!"

"Got him with a thunder spear. I missed my shot but it's down and won't be fighting anytime soon."

"Good." Armin hisses through his teeth. "We need to -"

He's interrupted by a loud cry from Mikasa.

"Its y/n!"

"What?!"

Sure enough they see you blasting over, taking in the situation.

The three of them blink in disbelief as they watch you head over towards the grappling titans.

"Focus!" Armin smiles. "Although... I cant say I'm not glad..."

Your eyes flicker across the scene, taking everything in. Zeke was down. Titan steam made visibility pretty low. Reiner was stuck against Eren with a long necked titan nibbling on his nape. You weren't too worried just yet, knowing Reiners armour will keep him safe for now. But then you see Gabi, alone and far too close to the fight in a town now swarming with Titans.

Landing next to her you grab her arm.

"Come on, hold onto me, I'll take you somewhere safe." You instruct.

Her eyes are wide staring at something you weren't yet aware of.

You turn to follow her gaze, a figure emerging from the thick, hot steam.

Your lips part and some unseen force seems to punch you in the gut as you see Porco, staggering towards you - half of his head is missing, his face covered in blood and yet... and yet he's smiling.

"It took everything I have to heal just this much..." His voice croaks, the effort of speaking too difficult.

He stumbles, still walking towards you.

Before you could even react, the titan chewing on Reiner leaps from him and heads towards the man who saved your life. The man who's heart you'd not long ago crushed cruelly in your palm.

"PORCO!" You scream.

And he was gone.

His legs flail in the air as the long-necked titan chews him in half right before your eyes; a scene now all too familiar.

Everything goes numb as you hear a roar of rage from Reiner, the surge of emotion giving him strength to pummel Eren into the ground with a single punch.

The world around you spins as you lose your balance.

Whether it was grief. Whether you'd just had enough... you didn't know. But all you were aware of was the hard ground meeting you before everything goes black.

*

Your eyes open, but you're not within the normal realm. You realise this is a dream and you recognise this place. It's the meeting place for you and Porco. The one you've shared for four years. Except now, he's standing with his back towards you.

Where you'd normally greet the other with glee, the atmosphere felt... different.

"Porco!" You gasp, sprinting towards him. "Are you okay?"

He doesn't respond.

You give him a small shake, panic gripping you harshly. "Porco, please tell me you're okay. What happened?"

He takes a step away. And another. And another.

You go to follow him but your feet are glued to the floor. With all your might, you just can't seem to pick your legs up off the ground.

You shout.

You scream.

You plead.

But without ever looking back, Porco continues to walk across the sand dune towards the star-filled sky until...

Your eyes fly open. You bolt up, breath heaving and tears falling down your face.

"Hey... its okay. You're okay..."

Reiner hovers above you, looking worse for wear.

"What happened? Where is Eren? Did Porco... was he really...?"

Reiners head lowers. He's not really sure how to respond to your question. He sees how broken you are. He didn't want to be the one to make it worse.

"Eren started the rumbling." Connie mutters from the corner of the room. "He's a lost cause."

Your brain fails to register his words.

Mikasa and Armin wrap their arms around you, more than glad to see you alive.

"Wait... what?" You struggle to comprehend. "No, he wouldn't do that."

"Its true." Armin whispers in your ear as he hugs you. He pulls back from your squeeze, looking forlorn. "We... we've joined forces with Reiners side. We... we have to stop Eren."

You let out a loud laugh, confusing your friends.

"So... this is what it's took, huh? For the pointless fighting to stop... its a little late... poor Porco... oh god... Porco..."

Reiner gives your hand a squeeze as you crumble into sobs.

"Who?" Jean frowns.

"Porco Galliard, the jaw titan." Reiner informs him. "He saved y/n's life earlier today. He hadn't eaten her. He saved her."

Your friends glare at the floor, guilt bombarding them.

"We need a plan." Connie huffs.

"We need to rest before anything else. Reiner is in no shape to fight and neither are we." Jean admits. "I mean, how much time do we have? Hours? Days?"

"I don't know..." Armin sighs.

You get to your feet slowly, still a little unsteady.

"This ends now. It has to. We can't take anymore."

The room remains silent and they ponder.

"We have to either kill Eren or let him kill everyone else."

[fandom-hoarder]

Ok, so I got an ask for mutual aid. Of course, it's human to want to help someone in need, even if all you can do is reblog their post. But you also don't want to be scammed, or help spread a scam. So you look for clues, or you only reblog your mutuals' aid posts because you at least know they're *real*, or you don't reblog aid posts at all.

So, what are the tells? (I'm not an expert, this is just what I've learned through osmosis.)

Do they follow/interact with you, outside of the mutual aid request?

Is their username weirdly generic?

Does the blog look like a real tumblr user, and not just someone who made a tumblr to ask for aid? How old is it? Is it involved in any fandoms? Does it seem staged?

Does their aid ask and needs description make sense? Is it overly vague, or bogged down with unneeded details?

If you quote-search the body of their aid ask, do you get any similar hits for scams on other sites or under other names?

Does the account for donations look legit?

What do you find when you reverse image search?

So, having received an ask that sounded very much like someone whose mutual aid I would want to support if they're real, but already having two red flags from the jump (not following me and not in my notifications, weird wording and grammar on ask), I endeavored to suss them out.

Screencaps of my adventure under the cut.

Like someone else has said, please don't go harrass this blog. Even if it's a scam, at some point there's a person behind that screen.

So here's the ask.

Red flags: they don't follow me, I don't know them, the ask is long, the grammar and punctuation are bad, word choices are odd or misspelled. These don't mean it's automatically fake, but it looks more like a weird AI than someone using google translate to communicate in English.

So I check their blog.

Their pinned post is this (click to read, it's a longass pic):

I don't take any links yet.

I take a block of their post and check it in google; all I get are snapshots of tumblr reblogs for their aid post. I click the "buy me a coffee" link, and it looks...idk, fine I guess. There's a tumblr logo, but clicking it seems to do nothing. (I'm on mobile)

A quick search of their name on tumblr gives me 2 posts mentioning them spamming this same message to people.

I read the one with the readmore linked here

After reading wannursyafiqah74's post about it, I got on my laptop and went back to casualdonutfire.

Mostly random reblogs; cats and other random reblogs of mostly pics, many with comments that could've/should've been tags, and no actual tags whatsoever. Like set dressing that says, "See? I'm a real person! I'm leaving comments about my reblogs that show I'm not a bot! I interact! I know what I'm I'm reblogging!"

It gives me a creepy vibe. I try google again to see if I can find their presence elsewhere on tumblr. The returns are still all snapshots of their mutual aid post. I open their archive. Ok, their tumblr has archive on...?

There are no fandom-esque posts until the very first reblog, a comment on One Piece fanart on October 18, 2023.

Their first post about needing aid was on November 7, 2023. Nearly the same wording as their pinned post, except they don't mention having a child. Zero specifics on what amount is needed for what or a timeline or anything. Not even anything about Christmas coming up. Tagged generously for trans surgery and other visibility words.

Oh. AND. The buymeacoffee is different. Adela, not Adella.

Then their next post for aid is fresh on January 11, 2024; nearly the same wording, except now there's a daughter and a birthday -- no date for the birthday, though, is there?!

[reblog linked here] If you go to their January 12th reblog and click on the "video proof," it's an audio-only black screen upload to imgur, with no identifying info for what's going on other than what they describe (and it doesn't really sound like what they describe; it sounds like a kid ready for christmas but not disappointed, like idk what more you're supposed to get out of it)

Then I clicked on their buymeacoffee link and noticed something. When I hovered my mouse over the tumblr symbol under their blurb, the link embedded there showed up at the bottom of my screen. And it was NOT casualdonutfire.

It was deepeagletimetravel. And, of course, it's a nuked tumblr. Hence doing NOTHING for me on mobile.

So I went to google again!

And lo, what do I find in those lurking reblogs?

ANOTHER MUTUAL AID POST IN EVERYONE'S REBLOGS. WITH A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSONA AND STORY. BUT THE SAME WALL OF TEXT + BAD PUNCTUATION STYLE

Using a stock photo for their initial "bio" that seems awfully misleading when you don't say it's a stock photo.

And with stolen/uncredited art by thetransformistress as a thank you.

And, of course, the buymeacoffee page it linked for Ameera (buymeacoffee.com/AmeeradelzC) is blank. 👀 Totallynormal, nothing to see here.

But this makes me think. I go back to that Nov 7 casualdonutfire post, with their first buymeacoffee link to "Adela" (buymeacoffee.com/adelladomil)--

and what do ya know, the tumblr that opens is casualdonutfire!

So did they forget they made an adela account, and change their ameera buymeacoffee account to adella for their new post, forgetting to change the deepeagletimetravel tumblr name?! 🤷‍♀️

[serendertothesquad]

The Ultimate Serendipity-Odd Squad Lore Post

Because you people keep asking for my entire story.

No, no, not my life story. Christ sakes, we'd be here until Gen Z'ers died off if I had to reiterate my whole life story.

No, I'm talking about my entire Odd Squad story. You know, how I got here to begin with, how I rose to fame, and how I am objectively still a god without a religion, a cult, or a religious cult. That story. You all want to hear that story.

If you're an oldie, you've probably already heard my tale at least once. If you're new here to the funny kids STEM show fandom, then damn boy howdy are you in for a wild ride.

Get a snack and a drink, pop below the break, and let's begin.

Allow me to take you back to the year 2014. I was the ripe young age of 15, finishing up my sophomore year of high school, and suffering from undiagnosed depression of the "I'm trapped in my own home" variety. We didn't have cable, and so stuff like PBS Kids, NBC Kids, and 4Kids were the only things I watched on a regular basis. In the online space, I was largely chronline to the tenth degree (and note the "largely", because, y'know...school). The Internet, and spaces like Tumblr, served as escapism, and I spent a lot of time particularly in the Wild Kratts side of things.

I had first heard of Odd Squad through PBS's own upfront, the PBS Annual Meeting, that was held in May (though the show was, as I would find out much later, officially announced back in January at that year's TCA Winter Press Tour). It was the network's first live-action show since The Electric Company reboot in 2009 that got swiftly cancelled, which was already enough to get me interested because PBS hadn't taken a chance on live-action stuff since. The premise, as well, was charming and incredibly interesting -- a secret organization that solves problems using math sounded a little saccharine and thus perfect for PBS Kids, but since it was live-action, I figured it could bring a little spice to the network in a way that not other kids shows of the modern network era (read: 2013 onwards, past the network redesign) did. The fact that PBS was willing to go all-in on the show, up to teasers, previews, even having two new games available for fans to play before its premiere, was practically the cherry on top.

Fast-forward to around September. By this point, teasers and promos were already coming out for the show that showcased Olive, Otto, Oprah and Oscar in action. And by this point, I was absolutely invested. On a whim, I decided to take my Sony camera and record a reaction video of me watching it. Was it weird? Yes, but I had no money for a laptop that wasn't a decade old and didn't run about as well as a computer from the days of yore. You make do with what you have.

Needless to say, when the first episode "Zero Effect" premiered, I was having a whale of a time. That's...pretty much all I remember. Aside from the swearing. Lots and lots of swearing.

(...Look, it was 10 years ago. My brain can only go on a decline after being fully developed. And the depression has been eating away at me for that long. When astrophysicists perfect the art of the time machine, call me.)

I uploaded it to my YouTube channel the day after the show premiered. No editing, just a straight-cut video of my reactions laid on the table. I figured, "Okay, so this would be nice to look back on and laugh, maybe."

And then, a month later, I got a PM from Joshua Kilimnik, the actor who plays Season 1's big bad Odd Todd.

Before I get into that, though, a bit of backstory for my channel is necessary.

I had made my channel in 2011, when Wild Kratts premiered. At the time, it was mostly hosting Wild Kratts content, mainly Top 10 countdowns of fan videos I stumbled across on Tumblr or elsewhere as well as Sparta Remix-related stuff. (Yeah, remember that old meme? That isn't as dead as you think it is? Yeeeeeeah.) Around the middle of 2015, it unfortunately got struck down pretty hard when PBS began to go Nintendo on it, viewed fanworks as threats to their IPs, and decided to rip down my videos from the 'Net in three easy strikes -- and with it, my entire channel. It stung, to see my relatively hard work go down the drain. I'd be lying if I said I had wanted the channel to stay up just so I can look back on it in 5 years and cringe at how juvenile it was. Christ sakes, I even had MLP stuff up there at one point. Why? Don't ask me. I wasn't even watching the show at the time. I truly got into it when Season 5 began airing.

But back to the PM. You know, back when YouTube gave you the option to PM people.

Getting the PM from Joshua, I was, naturally, suspect. Celebrity impersonators are all too common, and as I would later come to find out, Odd Squad was not exempt. I had to laugh, because an autistic nobody like me getting a PM from a child actor who was in the industry long before Odd Squad was like Ariana Grande up and inviting me to have dinner with her because I made a few comments about her diction. It's a miracle, people. Miracles that only happen to those with life-threatening illnesses or those who have done good for the community. I had neither of those. Unless you count me going to high school as doing the community a service, in which case I have one of those things.

I read the PM again. And again. And again. And something in me thought, "Maybe...just maybe...this guy is actually legitimate. Maybe he's telling the truth about the entire Season 1 cast and the show's crew members, creators included, seeing my video. I mean it's 2014, what creator wouldn't look to the Internet for first reactions on their show?"

Fuck it. iBalled. I went for it. I reached out to Joshua.

And by God's oddness-laden utopia, am I so happy I did.

We immediately hit it off, taking our conversation from YouTube DMs to Twitter DMs (no, my current Twitter is not that ancient -- my time on birdsite-now-saltyman-hellhole is a whole different story) and discussing our hobbies and what we did. Joshua confided in me that he helped disabled kids, which, honestly, is a green flag in my book off the bat as someone who is, in fact, disabled. I told him about my animal shelter work and how I loved the show.

At the same time, I had posted on Tumblr about the show. Don't ask me what the post was about -- I honestly couldn't tell you, and combing through the tag is something I'd need a hell of a lot of motivation for -- but it somehow, by some astronomical means, took off. People came in like a small trickle. It was small, but over time, we built a strong community. I didn't exactly know how big my impact on people was until I read "how I got into Odd Squad" stories and saw my name pop up enough times to the point where I could safely say I was an inspiration to more than one person.

At some point in 2015, I had created a Wiki for the show. Fandom -- or Wikia, as it was called back then -- wasn't exactly new territory for me, as I had visited other show Wikis before. However, my Odd Squad Wiki didn't take off, and someone else ended up making another one that became far more successful.

...Yeah, you're surprised, aren't you? Figures. But not even I can lay claim to everything.

When the other Wiki took off, Joshua decided to dive right into the fire and engage with the fandom directly. Now, for any big-name fandom, this is everyday normalcy. The My Little Pony fandom has fans directly engage with cast and crew members who answer their questions, for example. But for small fandoms of niche IPs -- and oh believe you me, Odd Squad was incredibly niche back then -- a cast member interacting with fans was a huge deal. The hype only increased when Joshua was named an administrator, along with a few others, myself included.

Needless to say, Joshua being involved boosted the fandom's activity exponentially, and not just due to his spectacular acting on the show. Fanfics, fanart, fan videos...it was a bustling time of fan content. I can recall some of the most notable works just off the top of my head. The fandom got to be so busy that I made a news blog just to cover every bit of news, shifting away from my Wild Kratts news coverage to focus on a different show instead. I enlisted a few old friends to help me out, converted them to be oddballs (which, I will say, was a stroke of luck), and put them on the "staff team". My aim was to create something akin to Equestria Daily, but on a smaller scale. We did editorials, episode followups, and scoured the Internet for any and every bit of Odd Squad news we could find. It became a reliable source for many, especially considering PBS's horrible track record with even the most basic of news -- cancellations, renewals, and other such announcements. Not to brag, but I like to think I did a better job than them at actually giving news to fans who deserve it. (Hell, I still do. My hunger for even small crumbs of news is very strong indeed.)

I can easily recall when Season 2 was announced. Me and my friends were ecstatic. For me, I never thought Odd Squad would get a Season 2, and the Season 1 finale -- affectionately named OINFO (don't confuse it with "O is Not For Old", that's a different rodeo; this is "O is Not For Over") -- made sure of that. Originally, it was set to air in May, before it got shifted to June to coincide with Season 2's premiere.

And even long before that, the movie being announced blew our minds. I genuinely couldn't believe this niche little IP, birthed only several months ago, was getting a movie. And not even one of those specials that PBS markets as a movie as a ratings stunt. No, no, this was a full-blown theatrical movie. With A-listers to boot! And it was a damn good movie!

(...Okay, unrelated, but man, I'm reading through all my old posts and comments on the Wiki and cringing. God, did I really type like a 10-year-old back then when I was in high school? Egh gross cringe. The "let her say fuck" was strong with me back then.)

Of course, as most actors do, Joshua largely moved on from the show as the years went on. Most long-timer fans stuck around until the end of Season 2 before either other interests caught their eye or real life just got in the way too much. A majority of these fans dropped off the face of the Earth like an introvert who suddenly disappears mid-conversation, though they still popped into the Discord server a few times and I reconnected with one or two on Twitter. Hell, some of them even made a "hey, I'm back, and here's what's up" post on Fandom that made me ask if their accounts got hacked.

As a result, when Season 3 premiered, the fandom had slowed down to a crawl. Anyone who's bore witness to it, whether an episode or a nugget of criticism, can probably guess why. (And anyone who hasn't can feel the wrath of my "trust me bro" card, thank you.) It was like I willingly leapt off of the boat, it sped away without me, and I was trapped in the middle of fuck-all nowhere with sharks. So, you know, like Open Water if it was actually good. But the point stands in that I was pretty much all alone. I couldn't crawl to anyone for the sweet release of death after seeing just how hard S&P tried to avoid The Shadow's very obvious murder attempt by way of hacking into a car to make it fall into a lake of green goo. All I could do was scream and cry into a mic, edit, upload to YouTube, and let all the unsupervised kids looking for free episodes come to me in droves.

Oh, and post to Odd News. Until I accidentally deleted the account.

By that point in time, my old friends had all left due to real life commitments, and only one, Angelica, remained. But even she drifted away, and I was stuck running it all alone. So, I made the difficult decision to let it rot, and frankly...I haven't touched it since. Largely because I left Tumblr entirely and only just now came back. On the news front, I expanded my coverage to PBS Kids as a whole network, just as I do on Twitter.

It wasn't until the back half of Season 3 premiered that the fandom slowly but surely began to grow from planted roots, and I could connect with people again. Seeing people flood the Discord server and Tumblr, sharing art and news and theories, was amazing. Not for Season 3, though -- it was because of the past two seasons. Honestly, to say there's been more talk about Otis and Odd Todd than about any other character in the entire franchise is a hell of an understatement, because it dominated pretty much 98% of the fandom.

From there, new fanworks, fanart, and other pieces of fan-created media were created, and many still continue to be created to this day. Though hyperfixations can be yoted off the cliff and die in an instant (with deepest apologies to Shroom), it's great to see a burst of activity in such a small fandom. Hell, it even got big enough to where we had a Secret Valentine's exchange a couple months back, which was a real joy because it gave me a chance to flex my writing chops even if it did leave me on the verge of a third panic attack. And...the fandom being revived did land me a solid interview for a college assignment. Which, to me, is my own equivalent of getting a dedicated panel at a convention.

But this isn't a whole entire story about fandom lore. It's a story about me.

And honestly...I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little tired with Odd Squad myself.

Between the choking responsibilities of adult life (yay work), the state of my mental and physical health (yay depression and anxiety), and the franchise being fucked over sideways to Pluto and back by numerous entities (yay TV industry), I really can't just focus on Odd Squad anymore. Now, I'll give a fair warning to you and tell you to make no mistake -- my enjoyment of the franchise will die with me and my entire bloodline if the franchise itself doesn't die first. But I've found other special interests and hyperfixations that have grabbed me more than the funny kid agent franchise has. I derive more joy from binging the 90s Frasier series, Pretty Cure, and Neighborhood Wars than I do with the funny kid agent franchise.

Now, does this mean I'm leaving the fandom? God no. To do it on the verge of the franchise's 10th anniversary would be utter blasphemy. And I do plan on weaponizing this blog for more Seren's Studies, including episode reviews and character analyses I can't do with the limited resources I have. But the drive for Odd Squad is just...no longer there for me. I did not, unfortunately, get the "Odd Squad forever" autism. I got the "childhood is hell, but okay, sure, I'll make you a functioning competent adult to a certain degree" autism.

Maybe one of these days, amidst the countless new pieces of media that keep releasing, I'll be able to rewatch Odd Squad. It's worn out its welcome nostalgia-wise, but I find it to be a pretty enjoyable view when I take off those glasses and put on the "my God is an awesome God and that's why I try to attend church every Sunday" ones. I'm still making crossover fan projects to other IPs like MLP, Super Monkey Ball, and Precure. And of course, I'll be seated for Odd Squad UK to see if it's good or not -- I'm more than happy to take the bullet for people who don't want to see it for whatever reason, just as I did for the back half of Season 3. But for now, the drive is pretty much gone.

I will admit, I'm likely missing some stuff. My memory is absolutely terrible, and I had to go fishing for a lot of stuff to refresh it (one of the reasons why this took so long to release in the first place). But this is what I can dredge up.

I'm honestly proud of the little fandom I birthed. I could work a hundred jobs in my lifetime and still say that founding the Odd Squad fandom is by far my greatest accomplishment. I've met so many amazing people, seen so many amazing things, and really, I'm hoping to see more people in the years to come. If the aim is to introduce Odd Squad to new generations of kids, teens, young adults, and adults alike, then I'm all for it. Expose them to goodness. None of that Cocomelon shit.

Thank you for reading, and to all of the people in the fandom both old and new, thank you for touching my life in ways I never thought of. If you've got any further questions about my story, send 'em my way; I'll be glad to answer 'em.

See you all in the next Seren's Studies, whenever that may be.