#and then turn around and say good fight
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Natsu is so funny because heāll beat the shit out of you especially if his family is in danger and then turn around and be like āmy bad we should do this again sometimeā no dude you just almost killed me.
#fairy tail#natsu dragneel#heāll beat the shit out of you#and then turn around and say good fight#no bro#this is mainly about him vs dimaria#he really said sorry I was out of it back then and thought Lucy was dead#no wonder she left fighting behind#also him vs sting and rogue#what is his problem
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Drew a little comic today!
Viz, let Blake be a little shit to Raven in v10 and my life is yours.
Per usual, do not reupload without credit/permission. Thanks folks!
(My ko-fi, should you wish!)
#This whole page spawned from the idea of Blake as that one cat with a knife pointed at it#And real ones know that I would sell my fucking soul for Blake to tell Raven off in v10#ESPECIALLY after what we learn about Raven and Summer in v9#You're telling me Yang's NOT gonna be a bit of a mess when she's forced to be around Raven?#Plus you fucking know Raven would say some shit about how she and Blake aren't that different#āI don't care what you think of me - but you and I are more alike than you'd care to admit girl.ā#Raven means that Blake leaves people she loves too#Blake decides it means its time to turn on the terrorist#That's it that's the comic#Blake would probably lose - with Raven's maiden powers and all - but she'd put up a damn good fight to prove her point#God I cannot wait to see the dynamics between Blake Yang and Raven#rwby#rwby fanart#bumbleby#blake belladonna#raven branwen#yang xiao long#temp tats art
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honestly as someone who has been in various fandoms for a long time now and who also watched campaigns 1 and 2 without really getting into cr fandom it isnāt Shocking but it is annoying how often people will look at the stories that cr tells and make absolute claims about the goodness of characters (goodness here meaning Moral goodness, not I Like This character and think itās well made goodness, which is a separate post entirely). particularly regarding the gods and pc parents. and honestly like, typically in fandom i get annoyed by people bending over backwards to woobify characters who are active in their choice to be unkind and generally horrible but in the cr fandom itās tended to be the opposite where like. a character is just. a human being (in the sense of being Average not in the sense of Fantasy Races) and huge swaths of the fandom act like thatās the most unforgivable thing someone can be. and maybe it is, but one of the most powerful things about fiction is that it tends to encourage people to expand their empathy and exercise their ability to forgive. because fictional characters, no matter how much people like to project onto them, tend not to cause anyone harm, so itās easier to learn how to forgive and accept things you donāt understand without also villainizing them.
this is mostly prompted by the recent 4sd and the fact that mattās response to whatās up with the dawnfather was a very insistent āHeās not bad!ā and also seeing the online reaction to the mention that the matron would punish vax for saving keyleth that has taken the as usual completely bonkers tune that the raven queen (Who When Met With A Brother Asking A God To Kill Him In Favour Of His Sister, Gave Him A Job, and Later Extended His Natural Life To Help Protect The World And Have More Time With His Family And Allowed Him To Visit His Sister On Her Wedding Day) is a horrible evil abusive bitch of a god. like. can we grow up? can we understand the world and fiction that represents the multitudes of experiences found in it in shades of grey? is that too much to ask (i know it is).
but also specifically the like Extremely Adamant way that both matt and laura were like no no no no relvin isnāt Horirble heās average. heās not good heās just. heās A father, not a good or bad one. and on the surface itās hilarious that theyāre both so like. enthused to point out that heās Average because typically when people respond to a claim of a characters badness with the level of immediacy they both did itās a rebuttal of āno, this character is good actually.ā but it was just to affirm that relvin did harm imogen, but not because thereās some aspect of his character that is inherently cruel or especially Bad. and like. yeah actually. yeah you should react like that to a claim that this average person who Has hurt someone, the way that nearly every single person has hurt someone in a way they cannot repair, with immediacy to say this person is a Person and thus imperfect and capable of great harm, but that isnāt some all encompassing judgment on their morality or capability to also do good or be fine.
anyway this is kinda just a rant post but also is just me saying iām very grateful that when surrounded by a fandom that tends to paint characters as Good or Bad and even while using a game that can encourage that with its alignment system, cr has always told stories that see goodness as a persistent choice that might sometimes falter and that can be chosen even after a lifetime of Badness. i canāt remember exactly what the quote was so forgive me if itās incorrect but when jester is talking to caleb after he claims heās not a very good person and she says āgood people do bad things sometimes. even bad people do good things.ā thatās it! thatās one of the most consistent themes across campaigns. and yet.
#on fandom#cr tag#i just. maybe itās the philosophy major in me but. good grief the shit some of yāall say about morality and then turn around and ignore#what youāve just said. good grief#lately itās specifically been the people who support liliana (i too love evil women) and act like she tripped and fell into her current#position. and then turn around and call relvin an abusive devil#like. sorry which one has been manipulating imogen. which one abonded her?#thatās besides the point. my point is. the words good and bad are meaningless.#the good placeism. is this character trying to be better today than they were yesterday#this is the imogen temult problem actually. like yes she Chooses to be good. but that is only a choice because we have Seen her be selfish#and cruel and manipulative. if i had to choose to call imogen good or bad iād of course choose good. but that undermines so much of#what makes her āgoodnessā actually compelling.#honestly same with fjord. like his character as a charismatic paladin who fights for Goodā¢ is comtextualised by having seen his journey#like. otherwise heād be boring.#like. if any cr main character was just Good or just Bad. i promise it would not be as popular as it is#critical role
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āwhy would elaena marry a dornishman when theyāre nasty evil people who murdered her poor innocent brother daeronā
maybe because once elaena grew up she realized that there were better ways of bringing dorne into the realm than violent conquest, and that daeron got the death he deserved from not just a nobility that is valid for fearing subjugation from valyria but also a smallfolk sick and tired of these people showing up every few decades to set their principality on fire, and put aside any anti dornish sentiments she may or may not have harbored as a child to see the way her family had directly attributed to their suffering, eventually even falling in love with and marrying a dornish man??
also, considering daeron ii attempts a type of proto-reparations act in bringing dorne into the kingdom, itās not out of the realm of possibility that someone as intelligent as elaena would recognize the inherent racism in the targaryen conquest of dorne and especially considering the very loud anti-dornish, deeply anti intellectual faction in the blackfyre rebellions, realized they wouldnāt be kind or understanding of an intelligent woman like herself and had no interest in herself or her daughters (of which she had four!!) getting shoved back into the maidenvault again?
like, daeron i is on some andrew jackson manifest destiny shit, and if it makes me an asshole for thinking āgod i wish someone had merked jackson before he genocided & displaced my ancestors, good on the dornish for realizing you canāt negotiate with imperialistsā than i am perfectly comfortable being considered an asshole right next to my girl elaena.
#everyone discoursing about the young dragon. listen. they should have tortured him before they killed him too.#anti daeron i targaryen#valyrianscrolls#anti house targaryen#idk just in case. clearly iām not anti everyone iām complimenting elaena & daeron ii#elaena targaryen#daeron the good#daeron ii targaryen#getting on my soap box#dorne#also when i say āmy ancestorsā i mean that jackson passed the indian removal act specifically to remove my tribe (and several others) bc#white people in the midwest didnāt like that we wouldnāt leave.#my tribe managed to work somethjng out and only had to move a couple miles away from our homelands. others in our area were forcibly mkced#*moved. look up the potawatomi trail of death. they marched them thru illinoisā capital. dozens including children died.#also read about the fort dearborn massacre. and rising up from indian country which makes the argument that it wasnāt a massacre#but a battle bc white americans had been raiding potawatomi villages for weeks. so the potawatomi struck back and people to this day insist#it was a massacre just bc the potawatomi were better at fighting than the americans. nah.#u donāt get to wage a war of conquest on an innocent and indigenous population just to turn around and say they were mean for fighting back.#iām sorry i woke up today and decided to choose violence. iām in an awful mood aksjdjd
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cannot stop thinking about lupa and juno's reactions to jason's death. god did juno feel it when he died? did she hear his string get cut? did she wail loud enough that all of olympus heard it? what was it like realizing the boy she loved like a son was dead? was was it like watching his father not even shed a tear? was she the one to tell lupa? and on lupa's end, how angry do you think she was? this is her pup. her youngest pup. he was so young when he first started, when juno first gave him to her? he learned how to roughhouse with her packmates. he learned to fly with her! did she snap at juno? did she scream and curse and blame juno? did she howl mournfully?
#these are his moms!!!#not very good ones but his moms nonetheless!!#when he fought krios do you think he heard their voices in his head encouraging him#'victory or death jason' lupa says in head 'die like a roman or don't die at all.' jason picks up his sword again.#krios knock his sword out of his hand and jason bares his teeth. that's okay. he doesn't nned a weapon to fight#he wrestles krios to the floor and the titan's throat is bared and it would quick and simple to rip it out but he hesitates.#normal people dont do that. his head pounds. his lady's voice exhoes in his head 'go for the kill always my champion.'#jason leans down and clamps his teeth around krios' throat and rips it out. the titans gasps pathetically underneath him#it's not enough. he can already see the wound beginning to heal so he digs his fingers into the wound and starts pulling#the neck rips quickly once he gets started and he snaps the spine as he goes. finally with one last tug the head comes clean off.#he stands up from where he's kneeling over the body and picks up the head by its hair turning around to face the legion.#there is ichor staining his mouth golden. it drips onto his armor. he lifts the head up high. the legions stares at him in shock and awe.#they look terrified he notes absently. 'VICTORY FOR ROME!' he shouts and the campers explode into loud cheering.#sorry what the fuck was that#jason grace#juno pjo#lupa pjo#hoo#hera pjo
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So you know this party banter between Aveline and Carver?
Aveline: I don't like some of the people you've been associating with, Carver. Carver: Talk to my brother/sister. He/She's the one in charge.
If you're on the rivalry path with Aveline, she says:
Aveline: Who says I don't mean him/her too? This city's full of people who are dead set on ending badly. I don't want to see you end up the same way.
I just- Aveline, you- you're so- hhhhnnnngggggg
I always rival Aveline when I play a mage, and if you think Edgar Aristide Hawke, who practically raised Carver and Bethany after Malcolm died and Leandra became a distant mother in her grief, wouldn't stop dead in his tracks at Aveline heavily implying he's a bad influence on his brother and Carver shouldn't hang around him so much since apparently Ed's someone set on ending badly...? Absolutely not.
This is another case of me wishing Hawke had the option to jump in during party banter with different options, because Ed would've chewed Aveline out for that.
Oh, and then there's:
Carver: Would asking you to stop spying on me help in the least? Aveline: No.
Aveline...................stop it.
#da2#dragon age 2#carver hawke#aveline vallen#da2 hawke#edgar hawke#listen all of aveline and carver's party banter and their relationship and the fact that they're pretty much foils DRIVES ME CRAZY#in a good way but then i get party banter like this and i stop everything i'm doing just to scream#like ed and aveline are on fairly good terms in act 1 i mean the rivalry is there but it's not too bad it's more like they just butt heads#but after leandra's death the friendship just rots and deteriorates like by the end of act 3 ed is genuinely surprised aveline#didn't turn on him and side with the templars but i guess even aveline knows what's actually right#or maybe she just doesn't want to face ed in a fight sksksks hell ed AND carver in a fight so it's easier to side with him and the mages#but anyway aveline saying that when ed's in earshot is bold but also the fact that carver doesn't actually acknowledge it#like he doesn't agree or disagree he just changes the subject to be like 'can you stop spying on me PLEASE'#like he already has no privacy while living with gamlen and now he has no privacy when he's by himself because apparently aveline's spying#also i always max out carver's friendship so he and ed are on good terms they're the brothers hawke and carver loves him#even if he doesn't outright say it you know that's what he's really saying in the last straw#when he says that he's proud to call hawke brother/sister and that's gone unsaid for too long like............ screaming sobbing throwing u#like the carver and hawke dynamic on his friendship path is sooo good that i hear aveline say that and i'm immediately ready to throw hands#btw if you're on aveline's friendship path she says 'maybe but i know you get around' instead which...........gets around where aveline???#aveline my list of beef with you grows with every playthrough i hate you but also i love you but also i want to throw you in the ocean#until you get your head out of your ass like this is a case of her being a FASCINATING character but as a person? while i'm playing ed? ugh#my lady warrior hawke adored aveline but ed is ready to fight her 24/7 sksksk
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GODDD.
#marzivents#to preface. i am SLIGHTLY buzzed. as in i have had a single mimosa almost an hour ago#today there has been aā¦ weird??? energy with the family??#my mom and dad are on two different frequencies today but like theyāre managing so whatever#my brother and i have been normal i suppose#but weāve been all together for a little bit to celebrate the new uear and such#clock hits 12. we celebrate. everybody has One mimosa. not a lot at all#that buzz hits me and iām hanging out. iām feeling good!#my brother says something or other and we start the motions of one of our go-to sibling disagreements you know the type#and my mother cuts me off says like āletās all relaxā or whatever. i didnāt feel that angry but like?? sure? fine whatever#we stop and i move on. once again not a huge deal to me#then my dad does smth or other. my momās been razzing him all day so i decide alright i will also razz him. a little lighthearted teasing#it is NOTHING different from what i normally do. just slightly more frequent#and my dad goes āi canāt have an opinion on anything huh?ā and i- committed to the bit- go āno <3ā with a smile on my face#like i am simply wanting to fuck around!! the way you do with friends! that is all i am doing!#i get in some other thing with my brother for like .2 seconds before my mom tells us to āstop fightingā again. alright cool#this sort of thing continues. and the air in the room becomes super tense for some goddamn reason???#eventually my dad heads to the garage and my brother follows. while theyāre gone my mom tells me i need to cool it and iām being aggressive#i???? huh???? what???#i was gonna turn to HER and crack a joke like āhow do you get them to understand that loud doesnāt mean angry?ā#because thatās an issue SHE has all the damn time! i was gonna turn to her and bond! but she says that before i can even start to#so my attempt to ease the remaining tension in the room is dead on arrival. in fact the room is even TENSER#maybe it was the champagne or smth but it just fucking got to me. i shut up and turn away and start trying to collect myself#iām realizing two things. 1- my emotions are less in my control right now and i cannot collect myself here. 2- I Need To Fucking Scream#so i silently pack up and head to my room. my mom knows better and asks no questions#as i was typing this post my brother walks in. i shoo him out without words but he tries to ask questions so i just repeat until he gets it#i feel fucking insane. what the fuck did i DO???? i literally was just fucking razzing. i do that all the time#and sure. i was louder. and yeah it was probably slightly more razzing than i normally would. but i DO NOT FUCKING GET how those two things#would cause as MUCH of a reaction as they did!!! like. i . hello???#the rest is in the replies bc i am out of tags but i am not out of feelings
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Inept 8 year old boy dragon tries to save floating island is such a concept
#momo just tell him!!! you've done this before!!! yeahhh#'this roof ain't big enough for the both of us'#luffy just telling momo to throw him something too akdhakaj this is back to how he was with koby but it worked so...#just grow some balls man!!! if he can spit something so can you!! BITE HIM!!! AHEKAHQK HE DID IT!!!! YEAHHH!!!!#he drew blood omg.... hell yes..... just be careful he doesn't bite back#luffy's exposure therapy is so effective. worlds greatest psychologist i have been saying this.#also nekomamushi and inuarashi better not die. i am also saying this.#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1050#me as baby chopper crying. actually and for real.#i don't have any points to prove for this but sanji and zoro look married in wano. idk man. i can just feel it.#i remember several episodes ago i was complaining about the missmatch of the colors on luffy.... i forgor why the band is purple.... qjwjaj#the music.... slay#i might be getting the luffy worms again i feel so insane..... what do you mean the sky parted.... omg neko and inu.... KICK THEIR ASSES!!!!#luffy fighting kaido and he still has time to boss momo and yamato around ajdbaks and roast him too lmao#momo thinking about kinemon and kiku....#PEROSPERO AND JACK FINALLY!!!!!!!!! carrot omg..... pedro avenged āļø now fucking orichi.... how many heads does he have left.....#why is luffy turning supersayian aldjaksn#episode 1051#just saw trafalgay written on a comment and idk if its on purpose or a misspelling but thags so funny akshaksjaka#yamato and momo father-son bonding time <3 teaching him how to be a dragon... so sweet#also the race of people that could set themselves on fire on mariejoa??? kinda random dropping it in there but alas... āļøāļø#zoro didn't want franky to help but there he goes.... out of onigashima... a good franky fart would have prevented that...#petition to rename coup de burst to franky fart. like why is it even in french. he is A YANKEE.#episode 1052#boy dragon sounds like boy genius. who wants to join my band
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I am. So so scared about that they're doing with Tory this season lol.
#ā” ooc. āā ā šš© šÆš° šŖšµ'š“ šš¢š³šŖ. ā#the thing is I do like a good corruption arc but she has already made so much progress and EARNED her face turn yknow?#it took her three whole seasons of changing and wanting to be a better person to get there. *that* didn't come out of nowhere.#and it wasn't just an act of necessity to get rid of silver and kim that is tory being who she is instead of this front of forced toughness#my mixed feelings mostly come from how absolutely convoluted some things are around her return to kreese#like for one I will say they did pick the only circumstance in which I could see breaking her enough to go back (her mom d*ing)#that is literally the ONLY thing that could have worked and been believable for me to put her in that headspace#where she's so desperate just to make sense of the world again that she's susceptible to kreese's influence again#I don't have a problem with THAT aspect. I like how that was done in the vacuum of things and that part is what works for me.#what I don't like is everything happening *around* that situation and there being some glaring things that have to be overlooked#to make it happen exactly as it did#for starters it makes no fucking sense to me at all that no one went to physically check on Tory when she ghosted everyone#and then NOBODY checked on her after that fight when something was clearly wrong with her???? absolutely not.#the only explanation that would make sense for me is that she ran away and went where no one could find her#but the show didn't give us anything like that. they just skipped time so they could have her turn be more shocking.#and I hated that so so so much#also the other major plothole for me is tory willingly working with kim again#kim is to her what silver is to daniel so I don't think even under this extreme mental duress that she would go back#bc kim literally traumatized her#she would go back to kreese yeah. I could believe that. but there is no way she wants to be around kim *at all*#that would be like having daniel forgive silver and go back to him just because he teaches good karate#I have feelings and obvs I'm gonna wait and see how this plays out but I'm genuinely worried#especially after seeing some stuff in the trailers / released screencaps that have me concerned about where they're taking it#which I won't talk about in this post bc potential spoilers but uh. I definitely have strong feelings about a couple of things.
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Hearing even the """leftist"""" english people talk about Malvinas makes me wanna throw up actually
You are not leftists, you are just colonization supporters who did a wacky paint job to show clean walls to the world
#how is your brain so rotten that you call yourself a leftist and then turn around and talk so lightly about this#and you don't even care what argentinians say about it like maybe listen to us for once#like really most people seem to only support decolonization in very specific cases and they feel so good about it too...#you're not fighting colonialism sweetheart you are it's healthy child
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FINALLY started titanfall 2, the movement will take a little getting used to but i'm pleased to find it's way easier to pull off than i thought it would be, the ghost runner is so helpful and i like the game's clever ways of giving you Cool Badass Moments very organically.
#ignore me#i'm very early in - sewage treatment plant section pre-cain fight#i got swarmed by the ticks and megaexploded for the first time and went 'ooo this is gonna be annoying. im gonna stop for a bit'#i'm having a bit of trouble orienting myself and keeping track of my surroundings but that's how i am in Every Game i get lost super easy#and the very minimal hud/quest tracker is nice and unobtrusive but also aids me in getting lost a bit#not too much though! i get turned around a little and then i figure it out#they're good at signposting your path pretty clearly with lighting & such so i can get back on track easy#a lot of the weapons feel VERY good to use too#probably my favorite moment so far is coming back from grabbing the first battery to find the imc guys around bt#and theyre talking about scrapping and selling him and i was sneaking up stealthy#and one of them says something like 'you'll say something different when the pilot has a gun to your head'#and i was like aha! my cue! and promptly landed a headshot on All Of Them in sequence which felt SO GOOD#so my review is 10000/10 good fucking game i'm bad at it but it's great#for context i have always been hesitant about platformers/games that require you to Be Creative about Movement#bc i was traumatized in my early years by fancy pants adventure 2 NO IM NOT KIDDING#I NEVER FIGURED OUT WALL JUMPS AND I FELT BAD ABOUT IT FOR AGES AND I DO STILL THINK ABOUT IT AND GET SAD
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really wish there was a tag that separated āIām having Big Angry and/or Angsty Opinions about Star Warsā from āIām goofing off with Star Wars Iām playing in the sandbox none of this is real so yes I will make my blorbo and this random glub shitto go on an adventure that makes no logical senseā posts because thereās too much of the former and not enough of the latter for my current mental state
#starlight personal#the good news is that I finally have another ketamine appt scheduled and itās sooner than I thought theyād have an opening#the bad news is that the appointment is not tomorrow and weāre kinda at the end of my mental-emotional rope#now kids this is what we call: an inherent flaw in my treatment plan that cannot be removed#because pretty much in an ideal world Iād have ketamine appointments every 6 weeks but 1) expensive and probs canāt afford that#2) they donāt have enough availability for that to be realistic 3) canāt take off of work THAT frequently without consequences#4) I would probably start to doubt reality if I was tripping that frequently 5) I donāt think docs would allow it#treatment resistant depression and anxiety my beloathed if we could just chill thatād be great#treatment resistant PMDD my other beloathed someday I will do my damnedest to cut you out of my body#idk not to be too selfpitying on main but god it fucking sucks that I appear to be doomed to another cycle based mood thing#PMDD means I get two good weeks two bad weeks#ketamine being the only effective treatment for whatever my brainās got going on means two good months followed by x bad months#until my next appointment#which like! two good months is better than no good months I am grateful that something helps#I just wish it was a more convenient help and it could be applied more consistently than my psych office provides#also wish I didnāt have to call them 3 times to get it scheduled but it is what it is#also also wish that I had fewer of the physical side effects of my anxiety and wouldnāt wake up puking the min things are rough#this is all to say: I want silly SW headcanons and droid headcanons and silly fic ideas and not Everyone is Always Suffering#but Iām also too lazy (I.e brain cannot make decisions rn) to search for new tags that may give me more silly#which means time to browse my bookmarks for good good comfort fics I have saved I suppose#(this is lowkey why i want to physically fight everyone i know whoās like āyeah meds would help but idk :/ā like!!!!!!!!#bro itās a privilege to have access to meds and itās a privilege to have a body that doesnāt turn on you the min you take one!!!!#just try 10mg of zoloft I would kill for 10mg of zoloft to not make me entirely incapable of functioning!!!)#I donāt mean that - you have a right to take or not take medication and everyoneās reasons may be their own#I just had my body and have some rough feelings around treating my issues being so expensive and inconvenient#and then feeling guilty b/c I know Iām lucky that I can afford it and can take off of work for it when I need to#like I am pretty lucky to have something that works and to have a care team that helped me get here#so I donāt wanna be ungrateful or unappreciative of my own luck in this and the work that went into getting here#Iād just also like it if I could change the circumstances slightly#make treatment on the weekends an option - get my psych office to have more than 2 trip sitters so scheduling isnāt so bad
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the results of that "is fanfic a book" poll have shown me one thing and its that this site never graduated past that absolutely insufferable phase in 2013 where everyone acted like every book is the single most sacred thing on earth
#sorry rant incoming. you know like the people who got way too offended over dog earing or carving books for art or things like that?#that's what the notes section of that poll feel like. just way too many people (on both sides) putting way too much importance on Books.#like first you have the 'um ive read fanfic that was deep and beautiful and thematic so yes all fanfic is books' votes#which like. ok. ive also read really deep thematic screenplays but that doesnt make it a book its simply not. what a book is#then you have the honestly even worse 'um your reylo au isn't like the works of the masters its not REAL BOOKS' crowd#which like. yeah most actual published books are not as good as the 'works of the masters' whatever that means. so you have proven nothing#which brings us back to the absolute worst of all 'colleen hoover & co aren't books either' SOMEHOW#like. ok well i think her work is pretty bad but it was literally edited and published into literal books so#if you're going to decide that you get to be the arbiter of what books are Good Enough to count as Real Books well you've lost already.#because no that's not how any of this works. youre fighting one of the most famous Losing Battles in all of art discourse.#a book is just. a format that writing can be in its not some holy status you have to work to acheive#and to try and turn it into that is really stupid and self important i think because like again#who gets to decide what books are Real? what motivates them to make that choice? what biases are benefited from that?#i think its worth noting in conversations like this everyone wants to deny female romance authors the title of Real Book#(which yes a lot of those books are very shallow or badly written. many have outright offensive tropes)#but nobody mentions the equally shallow and offensive stuff by/for men. like william johnstone's shitty cowboy books for example.#no matter how you try to frame it youre going to lose the second you decide something has to fit your standards to be real art.#avpost#its very reminiscent for me of the conversation around modern art where people just want to say they know what is and isn't real art#based on like whatever standards they want. 'ugh its just dots it's not real art'. do u see where im coming from.#a book is just. a piece of writing that was edited and published in the form of a physical book. that's it. its a v literal if vague noun.#it can be something with a lot of depth and meaning. it can be shallow and hacky. it can be nonfiction entirely. its not a value statement#which can also be said about art as a whole some of it is very shallow and bad. some of it is extremely skilled and profound#anyway. no fanfic isn't inherently books but some fanfics have undergone editing & publishing and became books i think#and that doesnt mean that they're 'as good as' the classics by really skilled writers. but theyre still books#tbh a lot of the published fanfic books are worse than most nonbook fanfic. them being books isnt a statement of being more valuable.#its just a literal fact.#i think its interesting to discuss but i swear its not a huge deal whether fanfic is books the bigger deal to me is#the weird attitude popping up on both sides. which i think most people would also find stupid if their brains hadnt been like#totally ruined by an uninterrupted 5 years of insufferable-on-all-sides fanfic discourse that has ruled this website.
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the dilemma of having ideas that would be best expressed as comics but being afraid to draw
#im gonna give it an actual shot sometime soon. maybe in a sort of storyboard kinda look so i can give myself acceptable room for error#anyways. linebeck comic idea. kinda in vein with that āeveryone on mercay knows linebeckā had going on hang on#salty talks#i love using mask stuff with linebeck. both in an autism sense and i nthe general sense that he has multiple different outward fronts for#different situations. the idea that he lets other people decide on those masks for him and he goes along w what they might want#to see from him. not really in a people-pleasing way more in a way to get what he wants and avoid getting hurt or. whatever criticized ig#but its to the degree where his actual self is veryā¦ repressed? stunted? restless? he doesnt actually act like himself a lot and the maskin#tires him out and drives him to despise others bc he does it as a sort of defense mechanism and to get what he wants so in a sense whats#under those masks has turned into almost like a muzzled beast. hes abrasive and resentful and exhausted and just a lot of pent up nastiness#like there are times when he drops the mask and its fine (like when he does it around link in ph or. like. if hes in a good mood#but a lot of the time that pent up masked resentment is what bubbles up to the surface when hes alone and he finds ways to utilize it#this leads into the idea that all of that pent-upā¦ frustration? with SO MUCH gets wrangled by bellum n used as motivation for bellumbeck#like. i do like the idea that bellumbeck is an awful fulfillment of a lot of things for linebeck. a chance to actually be able to protect#himself in a fight but also a brief outlet for every awful thought heās repressed and shoved down. some of those bad thoughts being directe#at link ofc like theres a lot of envy and frustration there and it does lead to a lot of the guilt he feels afterwards. i like the line abt#him asking link if he knows he wouldnt hurt him is like him just saying that but also asking himself. like. he was forced to act on bad#thoughts yknow so then hes afraid of what that makes him even if it was forced. anyways. linebeck acting differently to get what he wants#and burying and allowing his actual nature to fester and become resentful until he finally drops that mask shit and airs it out#just some assorted linebeck thoughts here. taking whats a puddle in canon and turning that shit into a sea bc why not. this idea probably#doesnt come across in any of my current fics but i want to do smth with it going forward yknow#linebeck ideas. yippee. idk how far into ooc territory im in now and at this point i dont fucking care cuz im tired of worrying abt it
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saw a post about how DBK and PIF are bad parents and if I had less self control Iād make a whole post explaining why they are good parents cause you see-
#lays down u donāt get it#he didnāt see his dad for 500 years he doesnāt know what his dad is like or how his dad will react#so red son constantly overshoots to make his dad proud#and even tho he fails a WHOOOOLE BUNCH#his dad (who also hasnāt seen his son in 500 years and doesnāt know who he is or how he reacts to things)#constantly gives him the chance time and time again to fail and try again#cause he can tell that this is importsntā THEY ARE BONDING#THEY DANCE AROUND EACH OTHER AWKWARDLY BUT ITS THEM BONDING#rubs eyes I gotta go back to sleep but I have lots of thoughts about the demon bull family#mainly cause I was watching this whole show with friends and they were all like#āwow that family sucks. they all suck. why does dbk keep giving his son a chance? just tell him no and do it yourselfā#and I slowly watched the opinions turn into ātheyāre a good family. he loves his wife so much and he would do anything for his sonā#and itās tRUE!#I think in the beginning itās meant to be implied theyāre all horrible towards each other cause theyāre demons#itās meant to warp your perspective until later episodes and you realise that was just them bonding#cause its tang telling the story right? so Iām guessing he just jumps and assumes a bunch unreliable narrator type beat#I say itās tang telling the story cause it ends/starts with him and heās constantly writing down in his diary the tales#LIKE WUKONG AND NEZHAS FIGHT- if he wrote it down from Nezhas perspective it would prolly be different but we only saw wukong perspective#so thatās what tang writes down (and this what the audience sees)#itās why thereās that whole thing of seeing the bad guys version of events but not seeing wukongs- which is why people like macaque so much#oh I could analyse this show so much#me? me? Iām ill I could connect dots that donāt even exist#smudgie talk
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Luke's song Diamonds is hitting me a little too hard and close tonight.
#really hoping things will finally start to turn around again soon#I've been so depressed this year it's probably the worst I've been in a long time#the worst part is finding a job has been next to impossible and I have no driver's license so I can't leave my house#my bedroom is the attic of my house and I have windows so all I've been able to do for literal months is sit up there in my cave#and just stew in my misery and try and fail to find a way out of it#I've just stopped taking care of myself as the months have gone by too#at least I haven't been doing as well as I was. I never really did a very good job to begin with#I just sit around and try to look at jobs and cry all day and I have to fight myself to drink water or brush my teeth at night or even eat#unless it's breakfast or dinner. that or I actually do eat but tell myself I've been eating too much and stop eating for the day again.#I harsly talk to anyone In real life anymore I just feel like I'm inconveniencing people by being around#I can't sleep without taking melatonin and even then it's hard to sleep and I'm just tired all the time#'Is this the way it will always be' indeed Luke#I'm serious when I say I think I have several undiagnosed mental illnesses only making things worse for me#but who needs therapy when we've got Luke's solo album and Taylor Swift right?#it's me. I know I do. when I can actually manage to find a job (soon please I really need/want š¤) and can afford it I'll look into it#abby's just rambling don't mind her#abby's having a crisis#goddammit I don't have windows in my room that's what I meant how could I miss the word no š
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