#and then this tsumugi one is the main screen

[aparticularbandit]

one of my current phone backgrounds, by the way

[xitty]

Collection of cards that show locations around Seisoukan (Starmony Dorms). Sister post to the one about Ensemble Square locations. No 3*s because they just use the homescreen backgrounds. Cards under cut, enjoy!

Seisoukan courtyard. There are doors to building 2 on the top of those stairs.

In front of the main entrance to building 1 (the common room is in this building)

Windows of the building 2 (which has the dorm rooms). :D Behind you can see the main entrance to the courtyard and the "garden/park" area on top of building 1.

That one tall tree in the courtyard. :D

Common room

Common room, this is left to Kaoru in the above card. You can see this area in the background of Nagisa's Conquest unbloomed card, for example.

Kitchen

Kitchen, the tables

Library 🩷

Library. Arashi is sitting behind the low table you can see in the above card on the right.

Home theater room

Hallways (they are identical except for some plant placements). They have those big windows that give to the courtyard.

Ceiling in the hallway. Of course it's a Mayoi card. 🤭

Hallway. Rooms numbered as seen behind Hiyori based on floors. So far, this is the only confirmed room number. 303: Hiyori, Kanata and Rinne's room on the third floor.

Eichi, Rei and Aira's room on the third floor. Eichi on his own bed, behind the divider (😂) is Rei's and the green & white is Aira's. Lolol why are these cards like this?

Leo, Natsume and Nazuna's room on the third floor. Leo's bed in the corner.

Kuro, Mao, Shu and Izumi's room on third floor.

Tsukasa, Souma and Shinobu's room on the third floor. There are doors behind Tsukasa (lying on his bed). I assume the ones in the middle are closets (looks similar to Shu's Solving card where he angrily crochets in the closet) and door on the left leads to the bathroom (a Hiyori 3* card story mentions a bathroom).

Hinata, Niki and Hiiro's room on the second floor. Hinata's bed.

Keito, Hajime and Hokuto's room on the second floor. Can't see much... anyway, Keito's bed.

Yuta, Kaoru and Nagisa's room on the second floor.

Midori, Tsumugi, Ibara and Mitsuru's room on the second floor. Midori's plushie filled bed in the corner and Mitsuru's bread footstool and bed on the right.

Tori and Yuzuru's room on the first floor. You can see the entrance to the room in the back.

Mayoi and Tomoya's room on the first floor. The beds are behind the sofa. I assume the bed behind Wataru is Tomoya's because the other one (which you can see in the home screen bg) is much more Mayoi's style. (Hokuto-senpai <3 btw)

Ritsu and Mika's room on the first floor. Mika on his bed. Some rooms don't have pics at all and this and Eichi-Rei-Aira dorm have tons.

Tetora, Arashi and HiMERU's room on the first floor. Tetora's bed and I assume the white one is Arashi's.

Old dorm building's balcony

[1moreff-creator]

Happy Birthday, Veronika Grebenshchikova!

I have a confession to make. Despite my account being themed after Min and having made several posts analyzing her... I may like Veronika just as much, if not more than Min. Ever since her introduction, this Horror Fanatic has brought a smile to my face every time she comes on screen. Literally. Whenever I see her, my face immediately splits into the dumbest grin, I just adore her far too much. There's a lot we still haven't seen about her, but in honor of her birthday, I shall give a few of the reasons I love this freak to the death, and make a sort of birthday playlist as a gift.

+The main motivation for everything she does is boredom, as stated in her conversation with Teruko on Ch 2 Ep 7. Her profile states she took on her talent to seek thrills.

+This obsession with entertainment twists her personality quite a bit. “I don't care about morals. I don’t care whether people get hurt or whether they die. I just need to be entertained”. She’s honestly such a queen.

+Her twisted morals lead to her hanging out with people based on how entertaining they are instead of, like, normal standards for hanging out with people. Arturo is example number one.

"If you become more and more irredeemable, then I'll only love you more. I want to hear all about those horrible things you did with no justification".

She would be a standard Danganronpa fan, is what I get from this line.

+She has claimed she “used to be an outdoors person”, but apparently isn’t anymore. Whether she simply got bored of the outdoors, or there was something more traumatic at play, is still unclear.

+Her profile states she likes skateboarding. I adore this fact. Why there aren’t piles of fanart where she’s skateboarding, I don’t know. Get on it, people! /j. Unless?

(Also, I like to headcanon that she used to skateboard with Whit in their time at Hope’s Peak, but she was actually really bad at it. She constantly fell on her face, but always got back up laughing her ass off)

+The upper part of her dress is black and white, colors associated with the Tragedy and horror in the DRDT universe. This is stated by Veronika herself in Ch 2 Ep 2. However, this color scheme also kickstarts what I like to call:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mastermind Bingo! Ft Veronika

>She wears black and white, like Monokuma and MonoTV.

>She gets bored easily, and it drives her actions, like Junko and especially Izuru.

>She constantly psychoanalizes people, again like Junko.

>She has childish tendencies (read: likes the playground), which can be connected back to the Warriors of Hope and Monaca.

>"If I wore contacts, a wig, and different clothes, would you recognize me?"

So, thinking a bit like Tsumugi there.

>"That's why I liked horror for such a long time. The genre seeks to elicit base, negative emotions out of you, like fear, disgust, or sadness... That's exciting"

She is one step removed from outright claiming she likes despair! What is this?!

Also, liked, horror? As in, past tense? Is that implying she doesn't feel satisfied with horror anymore?

>"But after a while, fiction is only fiction..."

You look me in the eyes and tell me that's not something Tsumugi would say. She has aspects of every main-line mastermind! I wouldn't be surprised if she starts taking notes from other fangans, I'm half expecting her to start talking about "the resurrection of Divine Luck" or something.

>And that's not even mentioning things like her quote for Mai; "A girl who didn't foresee the consequences". Right, because Veronika would be the one to get the most ominous quote after MonoTV's "It's all your fault".

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To be clear, I don’t actually think Veronika’s the mastermind. I just find it funny how incredibly suspicious she is, to the point of not being suspicious in the slightest.

+CW for self-harm for this one. It is heavily theorized her secret is "You only took on your talent to distract from your incessant need to harm yourself for fun". After all, she is one of the only remaining characters who covers her wrists and most of her body, and doing something like that "for fun"... sort of only fits Veronika, as far as we know.

+Her secret quote is: "Once something is broken, it can never be pieced together in quite the same way again. The same goes for people." Whether she's talking about herself or someone else is unclear.

+The recent Q&A confirmed the following:

•Veronika is pansexual! Congrats on getting her, pansexual community! A true win for you.

•The earing she wears (a small green triangle) was given to her by her “dearest friend”. This friend's name is apparently Alyssa Belyaeva, taking the dubious honor of having a weirder last name than even Grebenshchikova.

•Her favorite color is white with other colors, since it makes the others stand out more, and her least favorite is white by itself, since it’s “soulless”. That’s… huh. Is that meant to mean anything? Could it be she sees herself as the color white; uninteresting and boring on her own, but helps other people seem more interesting by association? Am I reading too much into this? Probably, but that’s sort of my shtick at this point.

•Her favorite ice cream flavor is funfetti. Based.

•She smells strongly like women’s perfume. I guess, why not, right? Notably, Hu smells like women’s perfume as well, but it’s apparently fainter. Doubt it means anything, but it’s there.

+Veronika can do no wrong. This is an objective truth. Slay queen (but, wait to like, chapter five. I really, really hope you don’t die at three).

And finally, like I did with Min, here's a few songs which remind me of Veronika! And as you're gonna see, my music taste sort of really aligns with the kind of songs one would assign Veronika.

CW, some of these can include topics like murder and extremely disturbing imagery.

-The Chattering Lack of Common Sense, by Ghost & Pals

-End World Normophaty, by Ghost & Pals

-Hide And Seek (English cover by Lizz Robinet), original by Ho-Ong-i

-Corrosion, by Riproducer / RIP

-Chronic Wasting Disease, by Riproducer / RIP

-The Spider and the Kitsune-Like Lion, by MASA Works (CW for this one in particular, it's really fucked up. Cannibalism, torture, necrophilia, etc)

-Hi-fi Evolution Theory, by Keu Studio (probably her character playlist song)

-What Gave it Away, by Riproducer / RIP

-Matryoshka, by Hachi

-Honey I'm Home, by Ghost & Pals

-Entomologists, by Ghost & Pals

-The Experiment, by Steampianist

-The Boy who Went to Hell, by SHUDDER

-Secrets of Wysteria, by Steampianist (CW, this one is based on real events of violent crimes)

-The Dismemberment Song, by Blue Kid

-Mad Hatter, by Melanie Martinez

-Uncanny, by Ghost & Pals

-God-ish, by PinocchioP

-I Can't Fix You, by The Living Tombstone (Veronika loves FNAF, you can’t convince me otherwise)

-Always Wanted, by MiatriSs - SayMaxWell

-The Red Means I Love You, by Madds Buckley

-Already Dead, by KittenSneeze

Alright, I'll stop there. With the final song:

-Happy Birthday! (but, like, a creepy cover or something)

[blorboindulgence]

I really need to draw echo unicorn (shuichi saihara) from my au because there's so much material that's waiting to be shared to another soul one day. (it's like an udg au, not an mlp au)

I might share the bittersweet stuff first instead of the outright horror but everything feels like it needs several layers of explanation of how things got to be the way it is, especially with the multiple branching endings and the au of the au with the rest of the ultimates being essentially magical girls in a ghost realm once they die (it's complicated). I need a board to create a timeline just to explain it cause it's a little too long. To sum up the main plot, shuichi gets adopted by rebel kids during the tragedy. Nothing to do with the little ultimates though.

I'm making a fun facts for it now

Fun Facts

Shuichi cannot drive due to having one eye left, to his horror the kids drive when needed instead. He's usually given GPS duty.

Shuichi wears a glove(s) with metal claws at the ends to zap things.

Shuichi can zap things with electricity

Shuichi finds the remains of DICE (kokichi's small prankster group) and uncovers a memory book the members kept. Since the photos are technically evidence, it was kept secret from kokichi. Shuichi saves the book just in case.

One of rantaro's sisters is part of the wild kid clan that shuichi is in, he does not find this out until a reunion ending.

Shuichi has watched all televised killing games except v3 because it doesn't exist.

There is a huge culture of modding out monokuma helmets in rebel kid clans. Shuichi has a cat helmet with a screen on the front with a single yellow left eye displayed (his left, our right). All modded helmets can talk over public channels or private ones, record video and audio, store notes, and anything else the kids program. Even live midi programs.

Year 4 is when shuichi loses his left arm.

Shuichi does not get fun aesthetic clothing design like the ultimate uniforms did, he has to take what he can scavenge.

Shuichi is unable to sleep alone due to his own codependent trauma and the fact he always ends up dogpiled by the kids at night.

Shuichi misses his friends but is also terrified of seeing them again incase they ended up turning to despair.

The wild kid clan has put on plays for despair kids to earn favors/resources from them.

There's no universal term for shuichi from the kids, he's been called big brother, old man, big kid, detective, and uncle. He had to take a moment after the first time he was called uncle.

Shuichi didn't watch his uncle die but he was one wall away and asleep when it happened. Maybe if he had been awake...

Shuichi gets really good at singing because he kept getting asked to sing lullabies as the designated caretaker figure.

In the average reunion ending, the v3 cast experience 7 months while 7 years pass in real time. excluding shuichi and tsumugi.

Technically, shuichi never graduated from highschool.

My favorite reunion endings involve the time reversal, only in the magic au, which can take on many forms but essentially the entire solar system gets reversed to the state it was a year before the events of tragedy. Shuichi gains everything he lost but loses everything he gained, he mourns the loss of the kids who are likely doing better now than during the tragedy apocalypse and he feels guilty over it. Empty nester to the extreme and he has to act like his normal mostly untraumatized 16 year old self despite being 24 mentally, deeply traumatized, and missing his found family.

Shuichi has a long necklace with with individual beads made by kids who think of him as a friend or family. And since kids are pretty sociable, he has a lot of beads. He fidgets with it to calm down.

[ecargmura]

Buddy Daddies Episode 5 Review: Unofficial Uncle Kyutaro Spotlight!

You can read this post on my blog, which you can click here.

If you just want to read it here, continue below.

Another episode of family life and no action. I kind of miss the action. I hope it happens soon. I’ll be disappointed if the action happens towards the end of the anime. However, I do think this episode was good for all the Kyutaro spotlight we get here.

The beginning of the episode shows the consequences from all the careless spending the family did to get Miri into daycare last episode. They’re financially struggling, meaning no more games and no more pudding for Rei and Miri, possibly. Because of this they have to turn to Kyutaro who gives them a job with a one-week deadline. I do like how this is implemented as even if Rei is from a wealthy family, money isn’t infinite in this world.

I did not expect to get Kyutaro spotlight in this episode. He usually makes small appearances here and there, but this episode gives him a lot of screen time. He’s surprisingly good with kids as he handles Miri well. He makes strawberry juice for her and helps her with her homework by telling her what Kazuki and Rei’s “jobs” are by making stuff up; Kazuki’s a nameless comedian and Rei is an oil tycoon (the daycare moms are gonna have a field day with this one). He’s cemented himself as the unofficial uncle of Miri.

He’s also very perceptive. He already knew who Miri is and the three’s current living situation. He’s also very mysterious as his words towards the end of the episode felt ominous. Will something bad happen to the dads in the future?

Miri is also the other main focus of this episode. Her homework assignment is her main focus, but her little antics are also the highlight of the episode. She sneaks out of the house on her own, just like how Tsumugi from Sweetness and Lightning did; on the topic of this, while Miri going off on her own is a bit nerve-wracking, I do know that it’s mainly a cultural nuance about Miri’s independence, so I’m not going to nitpick on it. She tries to follow Kazuki around and gets distracted by her surroundings like imitating a pretty lady she sees and cuddling a dog. I think this shows how much of a normal kid she is. She’s curious, a ball of energy and easily distracted. I’m also surprised that Miri seems to know more than she lets on. Remember how Kyutaro asks if she was fine with living with strangers? Miri responded that she wanted to live with Kazuki and Rei forever and that she loves them (she didn’t use ‘Suki’ which is a general ‘like’ but she uses ‘daisuki’, which means ‘really like’ or the more informal version of ‘love’). She never once mentioned wanting to go back to her mom. Maybe there’s more to Miri’s situation that meets the eye.

Kazuki and Rei were mainly comedic relief in this episode, more of the former than the latter in that aspect. Kazuki’s lack of sleep gets him having crazy thoughts and a hyperactive demeanor about everything. While Kazuki does seem like an overprotective dad, remember that he lost his pregnant wife in an accident. Miri is like the redemption he never had until now. 

Rei, on the other hand, still sleeps in the bathtub. However, he is making progress as the other father as he does call Kazuki about the missing Miri and they both search for her as a result. The way he was holding her gently at the end of the episode really does show his progress. He’s still the lazy and aloof Rei, but he’s caring more about Kazuki and Miri each episode.

Now that the two are back working as assassins, where will this show go from here? What will they do about Ryo Ogino who briefly showed up in this episode? What will happen if Kazuki and Rei do decide to betray the organization? Will Kyutaro still be their ally when drastic changes happen? I feel like there’s going to be a lot of angst in the near future and I’m not ready. Nope. Not at all.

[enstarsmusic-en]

Admin-san i know u like sora but what do u think about his shisho?

Natsume's a silly guy! I like how goofy he is, especially in the anime when it shows him and Tsumugi meeting in the library/secret room. His voice is one of my favorites. I don't know a lot about him but I love seeing him on my screen. When I used to play basic, I was reading through the main story and got to the part where Natsume does his weird speaking/curse thing and I genuinely thought my phone broke. I started reloading my apps and restarted my phone. It didn't help.

[the-himawari]

A3! Takato Tasuku - Translation [SSR] MANKAI Party (1/3)

Special thanks to @furuichis​ for sharing this backstage story with me! 💚🎂

*Please read disclaimer on blog; default name set as Izumi

---

Izumi: Great job with rehearsal today.

Hisoka: Good job.

Azuma: Great job.

Homare: Tasuku-kun, Tasuku-kun.

Tasuku: Hm?

Homare: It pertains to the VLOG that is planned to be screened at your birthday event. Pray tell, have you decided who is going to film it yet?

Tasuku: Ahh, I haven’t chosen or anything…

Homare: I shall do the filming for you in that case!

Tasuku: You, Arisugawa?

Homare: Precisely. I will capture a beautiful and artistic VLOG fitting for your birthday event.

Tasuku: *Sigh*… Well, I haven’t thought about who to ask. If you say so, then go for it.

Homare: Splendid! By all means, leave it to me.

-pause-

Tsumugi: By the way, Homare-san is going to film your VLOG, right?

Tasuku: Yeah. He himself said he would.

Tsumugi: Fufu. Homare-san wanted to film your VLOG very much, hm?

Tasuku: Like usual, I don’t really get him… but it honestly helped me out.

Tsumugi: Do you know what you’re going to do for your VLOG?

Tasuku: I’ve already decided. The theme of the VLOG this time is “a sight I want to show my fans”, isn’t it? The sight I’d like to show my fans—well, you might say you expected it—but it’s me when I’m acting. That’s why I’m thinking of having Arisugawa film me doing a street act.

Tsumugi: Hmm, I see…

Tasuku: Did you think I was going to do more something else?

Tsumugi: No, I think that’s fine. It’s very like you. But the one filming is Homare-san, so…

Tasuku: Good point… I can’t be sure whether he’ll just start blabbing. I’m starting to feel worried about the future when I think about that.

Tsumugi: Well, I’m sure it will be fine.

Tasuku: Geez, leaving the problem to me…

-pause-

Tasuku: …Alright, shall we head out now?

Homare: Now then, watch, everyone. This is the start of Winter troupe’s Takato Tasuku’s day.

Tasuku: Oi. You don’t have to start filming from this point.

Homare: It will be much too short if you only film your street act, will it not?

Tasuku: I’m not planning to make this VLOG that long.

Homare: I am sure all the fans would love to see your various expressions, Tasuku-kun.

Tasuku: Good grief. He won’t listen when I tell him, huh? Fine then…

-pause-

Tasuku: So you ended up filming the entire way here.

Homare: Simply taking a stroll and chatting… that sort of footage is also enjoyable once in a while, wouldn’t you say? Now then! It is finally time for Tasuku-kun to begin his street act. What kind of play will it be… I am truly looking forward to it!

Tasuku: This is pretty tough to do… hey, join me for a bit, Arisugawa.

Homare: Hm? But then there will be no one to film the VLOG. In any case, you are the main star of the show this time.

Tasuku: Then like before…

???: ‘Scuse me. How about I film for you, if you don’t mind?

---

| next

[ultimateplaylistmaker]

It only got worse. Rantaro slowly started hanging out with everyone else, having less time to hang out with Tsumugi and watch Danganronpa. Tsumugi wanted to know if it was something she did, but Rantaro shook his head.

Rantaro: Of course not. I guess...I just got over it? Like, I still like it, but it's not my whole life, y'know? I have other things I enjoy.

Tsumugi: ....Oh, okay.

"So in other words, he's outgrown it because some pretty blond girl who plays piano isn't into it!" She thought.

Rantaro: Anyway, I gotta head home. My family is gonna travel at the end of the week, and my sister's can't wait. See you later!

Tsumugi silently waved goodbye to him, feeling her heart sinking. Travel...so, moving away and coming back, right? People say one thing, but mean the complete opposite, right? Truths...lies...the whole world is comprised of them. Saying one thing and acting as if it's truth doesn't mean that it is!

Tsumugi headed home, and kept watching more Danganronpa. She fiddled with her own fanmade Monokuma's, called Monokubs. They were Ai, and pretty dim, but cute. Monodam was the exception. She sort of half-assed his design, so that would explain his clunky appearance.

Wrapped in her blanket, she stared at the screen, watching the episode of Danganronpa play out. Hope....and despair...two sides of a same coin. One cannot coexist without the other, and each time they do a beautiful swan dance until only one is left standing. But, what truly was hope and despair? Was this bitter feeling of loneliness despair? Was the fact this world wasn't great and filled with eccentric characters like Danganronpa despair? And Hope? Was watching Danganronpa every day hope? Was the sight of Junko, wanting to be like her...to be like all of those characters to take away this feeling of plain plainness Hope? To live in the Danganronpa world? ...that was probably it.

And as with every end of the episode, the entire Danganronpa cast came onto the screen and waved at the camera. And it always ended off with a word from the main lady herself, Junko Enoshima.

oh im on the edge of my seat and also how DARE you make Tsumugi this relatable

[airabuhan]

hi welcome to tumblr! i've been following you on twt for a while because i love your art! just wanted to ask if you had any kohaai reading recommendations (either enstars stories or fics), i'd love to continue learning more about them

AAAAHHH thank you for the warm welcome! i'm still figuring tumblr out slowly ahaha

i'll be completely honest, there isn't that many stories i can point to besides a couple since kohaai interactions are sort of spread out across a bunch of random stories hghgh. here's my main suggestions though:

main story 2 (it doesn't entirely focus on them, but it's pretty important to get an introduction at least and i think it's arguably the most important story to read)

newbies at friendship (aira's fs1 4* story... it's one chapter but it's extremely cute and iconic and also changed my life)

a dark night's passing (this isn't really kohaai focused, but i still consider it pretty important because it lays some groundwork for a lot of the potential nuance that kohaai can have if you're insane like me)

mayoi's sanrio gacha in engstars (this one is only on foreign versions of enstars, and aira doesn't even actually show up but it has a surprising amount of kohaai... it's mainly just kohaku being whipped for aira though so is that much of a surprise)

aira's bunny gacha (sorry i forgot the name of the actual story, but there's a chapter with kohaai... it's cute)

spreading love brings happiness (aira's fs2 story!!! i could go on and on about this story, it's just so sweet and heartwarming and very great... and it's ALL kohaai (plus anzu)) (also, i'd highly recommend reading newbies at friendship before this story... it really does feel like a continuation from that story to me)

there's a tag team mission story from 7th anni with kohaai (supporting each other through computer screens...)

besides those, there's crumbs spread out through birthday events and other small miscellaneous mentions. off the top of my head:

kohaai are on a parfait date in tsumugi's fs2 4* story

aira's 2021 birthday course has kohaku gifting idol merch to aira

kohaku's 2023 birthday course has aira gifting a towel set to kohaku

kohaku mentions aira helping him get ingredients to gift to ritsu for ritsu's 2022 birthday course

they go on a cake date in romantic? date. sort of . it's complicated. it's kind of for a dating sim route(??) but it's also literally one line mentioned um

i already mentioned the tag team mission story above but it's a really short story so i'm going to mention it again here

i might've forgotten some because i'm just going off the top of my head but yeah, most of their canon interactions are crumbs... crumbs that i'll happily eat up any day... i am a simple person (i hope this was somewhat helpful i'm kind of all over the place)

[thenewfuture]

I can totally understand the disagreement over whether Mikado is a good mastermind, but I think what makes him work for me is that we didn't have to wait until the very end of the game to actually get to know him AS a villain.

I think that might be why I couldn't really get into Junko as a villain because everything we know about her, we learn from secondhand sources and implications, but never actually see her accomplishing anything herself. Sure, a lot of those implications are compelling, but I find it kinda disappointing how nothing big that Junko does ever really happens on screen, if that makes sense?

Maybe this is a me thing, but I have a hard time getting into characters who show up at the very end of the story. Utsuro was one of the better ones, but even then, I feel like a lot of things had to be crammed into a single trial to work, and then we had that story segment at the very very end of DRA that explained his backstory for us.

I just found it nice to give one of the villains of this game the room to actually be a villain for once : P

Like I said before, a lot of Masterminds in DanganRonpa don’t really work because they either were…

A. Not apart of the main cast and simply watched everything the whole time(Junko)

B. Told everything about them secondhandedly(Izuru)

Or C. Have absolutely no substance, that when it comes time for them to be the twist reveal, I don’t feel anything(TSUMUGI!)

Mikado works so well, because he’s revealed right off the bat and his plan needed to be changed. He was full ready to go out, spread hope and boost morale to everyone until it was time for his big reveal, only for the Kisaragi Foundation to step in and doxx him on sight.

Now Mikado can’t hide anymore, so he may as well double down! He’s chock full of personality as well. One minute, he’s making breakfast for everyone with an honest to god smile on his face mask and just wants to be included. The next, he’s defending himself from Syobai with a sea of flames while flying in the air. Balance.

And he very clearly has no problem throwing his comrades under the bus to fulfill his desires. Mikado is a good love-to-hate villain. The best.

-Mod

[kelmugi]

hbd

“Aoba-kun!”

Tsumugi turned around to see Kel jogging up to him, confusion on his face.

“I have something important to talk to you about! Hurry, come with me.” Kel took his hand and speedily walked off. Tsumugi blushed and quickly followed along until they reached a random office space. As Kel opened the door and let him in, they closed the door behind him and seemingly waited for something. When the room stayed dark, they frowned. “No, this isn’t right… Did I get the room wrong?” they mumbled to themselves, fumbling with their phone. Tsumugi looked at their confused face and his thoughts travelled to a time a few months ago.

---

Kel had been working as Knights’ producer for a few months, and Tsumugi had met them a few times to discuss business here or there. They stuck in his mind ever since their first meeting, and Tsumugi couldn’t help but watch them out of the corner of his eye when they shared a space. Kel was discussing something with Arashi and Tsukasa, and it must have been something they really had to think about. Their lips scrunched to one side of their face as their eyes wandered, pondering the question. After a few moments they had their answer, and excitedly shared with their unitmates. The way their eyes lit up and their smile took over their face completely enraptured Tsumugi, and he had to look away.

He later relayed this to Natsume, after being pestered all day for acting ‘stranger than usual.’ “T-they’re so cute, it just makes me so…” Tsumugi trailed off, unsure how to describe how he was feeling.

“Damn senpai, you’re really down bAD.”

“H-huh?”

Natsume cleared his throat. “You really like thEM.”

Tsumugi blinked and frowned. Was it really that simple? And if it was, what disaster would await him? He was sure he would flub this in some way, sooner or later. He didn’t want to lose them, but he had no clue how to proceed.

---

Kel nervously looked up at him, not seeing another solution. “I-I think I messed something up. I hope Natsume doesn’t get mad…” They showed Tsumugi their phone, the screen displaying their texts between Natsume. Natsume told them to bring Tsumugi to a room, and Tsumugi immediately understood where things went wrong.

“Actually, I think Natsume meant to go to this room in the main office.” Tsumugi did not add that Natsume had been vague in his message, not sure if he did it on purpose or not.

“O-oh! Duh.” Kel sighed, having fully ruined the surprise. “Just pretend to be surprised when we walk in, okay? I feel so bad…”

“It’ll be alright, don’t worry.” Tsumugi smiled reassuringly at them. Kel nods, and they walk to the other building together.

---

The surprise party goes off without any more delays. Everyone mingles, and eventually Kel hesitantly walks over to Tsumugi with a hand-wrapped present. “I-I got you this, I hope you like it!” They’re nervous since their wrapping job is subpar at best, but Tsumugi seems excited. He unwraps it and sees a book he’s been interested in, which surprises him. He’s never mentioned this to them.

“This is so sweet of you, thanks so much!”

“I’m so glad! I read it in a class, so I was hoping you hadn’t read it yet…” Kel looked sheepishly at their hands, smiling softly. Tsumugi could swear they were trying to make his heart explode. “Anyway, I hope the rest of your birthday is good to you!” They waved a little goodbye and walked back over to where Ritsu was. Tsumugi hugged the book close to his chest for a moment, and then put it neatly with his things. Natsume smirked at him, making him puff his cheeks in annoyance.

---

MONTHS LATER…

“Aoba-kun!” Kel waved at Tsumugi, trying to urge him towards them. Tsumugi walked over confusedly, putting his papers neatly at his desk. They grabbed his hand gently, and softly said to him, “I have something important to talk to you about.”

Tsumugi smiled, “Is there another surprise party for me?” They both had already started walking off, but this made Kel pause for a moment.

“I guess I did use the same wording back then, huh… No, I actually have to talk to you, haha,” Kel started walking again, Tsumugi in tow. Both quietly walked to a far-off office room, away from prying eyes. As Kel closed the door behind both of them, they nervously looked at their hands. After a moment they seemed to gather strength and walked up to Tsumugi. “Um, this is really difficult for me to say, I haven’t felt like this in a long time…”

Tsumugi was growing more anxious by the second, but eventually Kel continued. “I, um. I really, really like you, Aoba-kun. I wasn’t going to say anything, but a lot of people really pushed me to go for it…”

As Kel rambled on about understanding the need for work boundaries and if their feelings aren’t reciprocated, Tsumugi stared at them starry-eyed. He had to pinch himself just to make sure this was real. Once he felt the sting on his wrist, he smiled excitedly. “I-I like you too!” With this he hugged them, holding them close. “I would never have thought you’d feel the same…” He felt tears reach his eyes, tears of joy.

Kel blinked in shock and hugged him back soon after. “Y-you do? I’m so happy!” They both stood there, smiling like fools. “I wouldn’t have ever realized how I felt, but I had a dream about us a month ago… I have never awoken so fulfilled before.” Kel blushed, and Tsumugi could feel the love in his heart growing even more than he thought possible.

“I’ve been in love with you since we first spoke,” Tsumugi admitted.

Kel was astounded, remembering as they, dripping sweat, tried to drag a sleeping Ritsu to practice. That had been when Tsumugi saw them for the first time, and they were a little mortified. After a small introduction both continued on their ways, but Tsumugi couldn’t get their voice out of his mind. They seemed so sweet and considerate, even in their short interaction.

Tsumugi remembered this and his past birthday fondly, recalling Kel’s nervousness about their gift.

“You know, just you holding my hand was enough of a birthday gift for me.”

[hajimariwaquartet]

Hi hi hi!!💕 Oh my goodness your a3der swap was so much fun i really had to come here again and let you know!! Oh, have you thought about doing more swap of these? Not to put pressure or anything because there are A LOT of things to take into consideration but i do think you would do such a good job!!

In any case, i loved it. Thank you so much!! 💕

awww thank you!! im glad you enjoyed it!! i was actually planning to doodle a few more scenes (sakuya going "FIGHT ME" to chikage, kumon being blinded by banri's smile, summer troupe hug pile, and fuyugumi getting their own tv show after one of tsumugi's directors sees them and goes "can i get you guys for my new show pleaseplease" ) but im less inclined to draw these days, unfortunately. but i'm planning on writing a fic for this swap au since i have so many things i wanna explore!!

here's a list of stuff i wanna explore in this au!!

sakuya having beef with both chikage and sakyo from main story conflicts + masumi going "hell no" when sakuya approaches him in act 1 for mankai

itaru being the first victim of sakuya's freaky strength

sakuya has a bit of a sore spot for being called short and he raises hell when someone does call him any form of short (midget, kid) and sakyo unfortunately stepped on a landmine when he called him a middle-schooler for his looks and temper (since swap sakuya reminds him of azami so much)

chikage thought his infiltration plan was Good but he didn't think of sakuya being ridiculously perceptive with his true intentions. chikage gets irritated with how eager he is to pick fights with him in particular, and hisoka's like "hey doesn't he remind you of you when you were younger" "shut up."

tenma helping out the summer troupe in their schoolworks and being the introvert adopted into the group of friends

tenma being generally a lot less outspoken and prideful compared to canon, but he's still sharp with acting as ever

tenma going along with misumi's triangle hunts and he finds himself actually enjoying hunts bc misumi makes it so fun

tenma is friends with taichi in this au, since taichi felt bad that he passed the audition that broke the actor tenma sumeragi. taichi hesitates when reni asks him to infiltrate mankai, and tenma's one of the reasons why he can't just bring himself to destroy mankai

swap banri and sakuya contrast and comparison (since both of their first arcs seem to rely on motivation and how it affects someone)

banri being an absolute angel!! and freaking out the readers and audience as well during picaresque, since no one expects the Prince of Hana High to play a gangster and banri not being the fox-faced gangster we know and love

sakuya, masumi, and banri being a legendary trio since no one understands why the hell are they all hanging out (until they learn they're in the same troupe, at least)

banri being motivated by spite to start acting properly, then he actually finds his motivation to act!! thanks to juza getting tired with his "others think this is okay" thinking and telling him off for it

tsumugi being dramatic and an expert on the screen, but kinda clumsy off the camera. imagine him playing a lucimugi role one minute, then he trips over some exposed wires the next minute.

tsumugi being Prideful™️ and a bit of dick too since i think it's interesting to explore a tsumugi like that

fuyugumi saving tsumugi when he forgets his disguise (again) since he's not used to being an actual celebrity (bc veludo theatergoers aren't the rabid type). hisoka and guy pull off some secret agent stuff, azuma charms their way out of the crowd, and tasuku just carries him like a sack of potatoes and runs.

tsumugi maknae (?) sorry i realized that he sorta looked like a kpop idol and i was like 👁👁

[yandere-daze]

Ever since I got 1 uncap of Link Clink Mika, I’ve been trying to get more but no matter how much I pull I still can’t get him 😭😭😭 it makes me feel like the other characters are like “no more! He has enough of your attention!!!” (He is on my profile and my main screen and he’s taken over as my wall paper and widgets haha,,,) Especially since Nito and Tomoya came home one after the other and also Madara in a ten pull. The self aware au you have makes me imagine them getting jealous of Mika and keep stopping him from coming home to me again >3< even tsumugi is being kept away from me haha

Ahh first of all congrats on actually bringing Mika home, that seems to be a very rare thing on here! He´s been giving a lot of people trouble :/ I hope you´ll be able to get more copies of him, even if the other idols are interfering!

They are sure to be jealous of Mika because of all of the attention he´s been getting from you. They thought now that you have him you would finally let up and save some pulls for their future banners but no! You just kept going and going and they´re so sad because do you really like him that much? What do you see in him that you want him so desperately???

So obviously the others needed to intervene and come home to you too in the hopes your focus might shift once again once you got them and realized how excited they are to be with you. It doesn´t look like you´re getting another copy of Mika but they are more than eager to come home to you without any effort at all. Maybe it´s worth looking their way instead? Mika couldn´t ever treasure you like they can...

To which Mika would violently protest to if he could, he obviously loves you way more than anyone else! He basically worships you! But you sadly can´t hear him aside from his voiced lines...

[hopeymchope]

Random Danganronpa S musings after having 24 hours to digest the announcement

— Get a load of that cover art. I’m sort of surprised that they spoil the existence of Toko’s other personality right there on the front, but I guess that’s a pretty early reveal in the very first game and it’s also heavily telegraphed in advance, so no biggie. The real question here is: WHY is Komaru so prominently shown when her starring role is the only game not included in the collection? I would fucking LOVE to later find out that we’re also getting Ultra Despair Girls in this set somehow, but I don’t think there’s any chance of that. And I seriously doubt she’s going to be integral to the events of Danganronpa S: USC. So what gives? Perhaps it’s just another way to mislead newcomers, like the prominence of Kaede and Hifumi. The entire selection of characters here is sort of curious and makes me wonder if this art already existed before now. I don’t believe I’ve previously seen it, though.

 — I wonder how they’re fusing the turn-based combat into the board game this time? Obviously there shouldn’t be some random “exams” that occur at the end of a board, because the story is no longer centered around completing years of school. So what’ll be the driver behind encountering enemies? Maybe they’ll be on random board spaces? 

— They showed us the screen where you can choose higher-level cards that represent more powerful versions of the game characters just like in Ultimate Talent Development Plan. But the main reason to use those rare-unlock options in UTDP was to get tougher characters for use in the Despair Dungeon. I’m not expecting a dungeon crawler to be included with this one, so what’s the purpose of the S-level cards and such? ........ Unless I really should expect dungeon crawling to be integrated into this somehow! I’m just spitballing now, but maybe we will progress through various boards, and some boards will represent dungeons/combat areas? 

— Of course I assume Junko is behind the invasion of Monokuma and his army of Mono-bots. I’m quite confident that this is going to be another AU where she has a whole new plot for driving despair just like she did in UTDP/Despair Dungeon. Perhaps the entire resort trip is part of her overarching plan. We’ve already seen Junko (on the title screen) and “Junkuro” (seen above) in the screenshots so far, too, so Mukuro is presumably acting as support for Junko’s plot once more. And I wouldn’t be surprised if Tsumugi is in on the plot again as well... even though I’ve long wanted to see a version of Tsumugi who isn’t just evil. I was actually disappointed when I unlocked the scene in UTDP that revealed she was still putting on a front to hide her true nature. 

— The prescence of “Junkuro” strongly implies that we won’t once AGAIN won’t get to see Mukuro as herself. :( That was one of the big disappointments of UTDP for me, although I realized at the time that UTDP was mostly made out of existing assets. However, now that they’re making a bunch of new sprites and CGs for Danganronpa S, it makes the idea of trapping Mukuro in her disguise just much harder to swallow... I hope I’m wrong and we can unlock some way to play as Mukuro as herself. UTDP at least gave us a retro sprite for her, but it doesn’t seem like it’d be that difficult to give her a proper sprite set.

— What can we glean about the gameplay from the above screenshot? What drove the player to wander into a dead end of the board? Will such dead ends potentially hide some special items, rare events, or secret pathways? Is the player’s choice to venture down there somehow connected to the “Mission” stated at the bottom? Are these “missions” going to be side objectives or the main requirements to progress? It’s also noteworthy that every image/video of the board we’ve been given shows the same section of the same board. Is there only going to be one massive board for each runthrough, or will we still see different board options/”courses”? I hope for the latter, but I could do without the Despair Course...

— Dude, I was shocked to see that Togami is ripped on the title screen. Still, I guess it’s believable enough that he’d take the time to sculpt his body as much as possible. I was much MORE shocked to see Kazuichi looking fucking CUT in the swimsuit scene. What the hell?! How many abs can you develop from mechanic work? Because I am assuming none. I guess he must work a lot of crunches into his days. 

— Remember the “Future Course” in UTDP? It took a ton of time to unlock it, but I loved that there was a way to bring in the Danganronpa 3 anime-only characters, even if it was just for simplistic retro-style sprite interactions. I wonder if we’ll see anything similar with those characters in this release? They already have the retro sprites, after all! So here’s hoping for more time with the Future Foundation crew. 

— Really digging the fact that you now unlock story/interaction scenes on a menu where you can rewatch them. That’s going to make the scenes I’ve experienced so much easier to track! I’d really like to see them provide some hints for any spaces on the menu that are unfilled, but I won’t hold my breath.

— The selection of characters featured in the Collector’s Edition art print is sort of random, isn’t it? When you take all three together, is there any commonality they share? This feels like the result of some Japanese fan poll that determined these to be the most beloved/marketable options or somesuch.

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

(iii)

Ah, sorry!

...What did you find...?

*Keebo, still appearing incredibly nervous, plays the footage once everyone has a good view of the screen...And true to his word, what presents itself before the V3 gang is unfathomable.

——————————————————————

Īꞩ īⱦ ⱳꝋɍҟīꞥꞡ? Ʉꞡħ…Ⱦħīꞩ ꞩīꞡꞥⱥł īꞩ ⱦēɍɍīƀłē! Ⱥ ⱳꝋɍłđ-ȼłⱥꞩꞩ ħⱥȼҟīꞥꞡ ꝋɍꞡⱥꞥīƶⱥⱦīꝋꞥ ⱥꞥđ ɏꝋᵾ ꞡᵾɏꞩ ȼⱥꞥ'ⱦ ēꝟēꞥ ꞡēⱦ ⱥ ꞩīᵯꝑłē ȼⱥᵯēɍⱥ ⱦꝋ ӻꝋȼᵾꞩ?

Ʉꞡħ…Ⱳħⱥⱦēꝟēɍ. Ī'ᵯ ɉᵾꞩⱦ ꞡꝋꞥꞥⱥ ꞩⱦⱥɍⱦ ⱦⱥłҟīꞥꞡ, ⱥꞥđ ħꝋꝑēfully it'll clear up...

Hello. Hello to the participants of Danganronpa V3: I am ERR0RM3SS4GE's Agent Bluescreen.

*As Agent Bluescreen talks, the garbled footage slowly starts to clear up.

But...You all might know me better as...

...Tsumugi...Shirogane...

...

Yes...I know how this looks...And how you must be feeling right now...So before anything else, let me get the biggest, most important fact out of the way immediately...!

The Tsumugi Shirogane that you've been fighting! The one who commands Organization Zetsubou! Is! NOT! ME!

She is an IMPOSTER! And if she tries to convince you otherwise, don't listen to her! Her heart's a ball of pure evil!

If you don't believe me, I can clear your doubts and recollect what happened to me when I first arrived in this universe. At the end of the Danganronpa V3 Killing Game, I watched as Keebo destroyed the Ultimate Academy for Gifted Juvenile's, and was crushed under a falling rock with Monokuma. When I awoke, I escaped from a cryogenic pod with Rantaro and Kaede. Just as the rest of you have surely done.

Rantaro and I were picked up by ERR0RM3SS4GE and the two of us were inducted thanks to his technological know-how, and my own digital skills. We were both there to erase Kaede's memories so that we could hide her from the other Shirogane. Since then, I've been trying to look into this other Shirogane's origin point.

Unfortunately, the multiple universe stuff goes right over my head, so I initially proposed that we open the idea to work with Izuru Kamukura's descendent, who is the one who brought us to this world. You know him as Uchui.

Well...Uchui doesn't know I exist, and has never met me. My identity is one of ERR0RM3SS4GE's top secrets, but I think it's high time the rest of you knew about it.

Most of his contacts have been through Rantaro. But I had Rantaro probe Uchui for information and came up with a few theories of my own. But the main one is that the Tsumugi that you've been fighting against may be a Tsumugi from a parallel universe.

By which I mean one where V3 still happened, but things didn't go exactly the same way. Uchui even confirmed that such a thing was possible.

For example, there may have been timelines where Chihiro Fujisaki became the Future Foundation's Ultimate Hope at the end of the first Killing Game. Or where Mahiru Koizumi became the Ultimate Hope instead of Hajime Hinata. Just a few examples.

Either way, I'm positive that something happened to that Tsumugi to make her more stir crazy than me. I'm not going to claim innocence, but I think we can all agree that she's done far more harm to this world than I or ERR0RM3SS4GE ever could have. And I had Rantaro do some upfront investigation while he was with you guys...

...

Speaking of which...Rantaro is having me record this message in the likelihood that he somehow becomes compromised during the mission. Whether he's indisposed an unable to talk to you or...something worse...

He wanted to leave a message in the Symmetra Matrix as a contingency to make sure that this information gets to you. Believe me when I tell you that these conspiracies, and this endless swirl of truth and lies runs deeper than you can imagine.

But...now is not the time to dive into them. I would much rather do it in person.

Listen to me. In a few months time, when all the heat from the end of the fighting has died down, I will send you a location. I want as many of you as you can to come and meet me, and when you do, I promise, I will explain everything.

*Tsumugi crosses her fingers and places them over her heart.

I know this all probably seems insane...And I know that as the Mastermind who watched you all during the V3 Killing Game, you don't have any reason to trust me. But I promise everything I've just told you is the truth. If you don't trust me, at least trust Rantaro!

We are ERR0RM3SS4GE. And regardless of what happens, we are your allies. I'll see you all soon.

And one more thing...Just a personal thing I need to mention...Kaede? Shuichi? You two are probably the one's suffering the most thanks to my copy's terrible misdeeds.

On behalf of her, even though I wish not to associate with her...I'm sorry for all you've been through. I promise, one of these days, no matter how long it takes me, I will make up for all the pain I've put you through...

*And just like that, the broadcast ends.

This is Our Reality [END OF ARC]

So...Nico Himuro really left...And she left the Symmetra Matrix behind?

She wanted you to keep it. I think it was just one final act of kindness on ERR0RM3SS4GE's part.

Yeah...Probably...

*After saying their goodbye's to Kuripa, Shuichi and Kaede return to Shuichi's office. Shuichi sits on his chair, head in his hands while Kaede sits on his desk next to him.

Are you feeling okay?

I definitely feel better now. Kokichi helped talk some sense into me.

I...I'd be lying if I said I didn't have any reservations...In fact, I don't think I'm gonna be able to get any sleep tonight...

You will when the exhaustion kicks in. Staying up and fighting for over 24 hours is gonna take a mental or physical toll on anyone.

I can sing you a lullaby if that helps.

Hehe...I'm not a little kid, but...that actually sounds nice.

Honestly, at this point, I think a vacation is called for...

Ahaha. Yeah, that sounds nice.

*Kaede shimmies along the desk until she's in front of Shuichi, and she starts to lift her legs and hug him with her thighs.

Are you thinking...A vacation for the team or...some kind of honeymoon...?

*Shuichi lets himself be pulled in until he wraps his arms around her.

Well, I could be persuaded to have some alone time...

*The two of them slowly start to kiss deeply and passionately.

In all seriousness, please let me know if there's anything I can do to help you Shuichi. You and I are a team, you know? We gotta be there for each other.

I know Kaede. And I do trust you more than words can express. It's just...I'm not really sure where we go from here.

Well...I guess we just take our time, huh? Nothing wrong with living in the moment and appreciating what you've still got.

You're right...

*They start to kiss again, but suddenly...!

*SLAM!*

SHUICHI! Haah! Haah! Are you here!?

GAAGH!?

H-Hey! Keebo! Kind of in the middle of something! Do you mind!?

A-Ah! Sorry! N-No! I really am sorry, but this is important!

*A little bit disappointed, but also heavily concerned from the look on the robot's face, Kaede pulls away from Shuichi as Keebo, panic-stricken, rushes over to his desk.

K-Keebo, calm down! Wh-What's the matter?

I'm sorry, I know that you really need to take a break, and I'm sorry for barging in on the two of you, but it's urgent!

I did as you asked and I started investigating Rantaro's Symmetra Matrix. And when I managed to look into it's database, I found something unbelievable!

Wh-What did you find?

Trust me...You won't believe me if I tell you! I NEED to show you! Right now!

And not just you! Everyone needs to see this! Please, help me gather everyone up, and meet me in the tech lab! You know where Kaito and Kokichi last were, right!?

Kokichi too? Just...what did you come across!?

——————————————————————

*While Keebo returns to the hospital to gather everyone up that remained with Himiko, Kaede and Shuichi go and find Kaito and Kokichi. After a short time, they reconvene in the tech lab.

Oh...Good...Everyone's here.

Keebo! You alright?

[emilycollins00]

hello! i love your writings a whole lot, and im real excited that youre open for requests! if it's alright, may i request itaru and tsumugi (separately) with an s/o that is insecure about their body/weight? and maybe they're trying to lose weight but are struggling a little bit? ive been trying myself and i think it would be a cute scenario (and i think ive earned a treat to read some of your stuff, not to sound condescending or anything djhsdklf sorry)

Not me crying while reading this I’m-?? Sorry this took so long, you deserve this and more!! 💕

TRIGGER WARNING just in case weight/gaining weight is triggering to any of you. I want to be extra sure to mention it.

Please enjoy! 💕

Itaru and Tsumugi x s/o struggling with their weight

Itaru

“I still wonder how Chikage-san puts up with your messiness.”

Itaru shrugs lazily, leaving the jacket and suitcase on the -if you squinted real hard- couch. You follow after him while looking around the familiar room. In the two weeks you have been absent from setting a foot on the dorm, you would bet not a single thing had moved. “I’m not gonna help you clean this time.”

The spring member moves his hand dismissively. “I know, I know. I’ll clean it up at some point.”

You hum. “I’m sure you are.”

You grimace when he moves aside unceremoniously the, what you guessed were, leftovers of junk food he had probably fetched and eaten at 3am.

“You really are in a hurry, uh.”

Itaru chuckles, yet his eyes don’t stray away from setting all the panels and screens required to turn on the computer. “Yeah, well… you may define it as a call for us true Knirou lovers out there. Care to pass it to me?”

You reach out to the packet carefully placed it inside the suitcase priorly left on the sofa. Once it’s on your hands you turn it around curiously, the face of the main characters on full display under the title Knight Round: The odyssey.

Honestly, it was a miracle Itaru had had enough self-control to go to work.

“I thought the rest of the Spring Troupe might have wanted to try it.” You hand the game and make space to make yourself comfortable on the sofa. “Or Banri-kun for that matter.”

“Gotta be honest Citron and Banri wanted to but were dragged by Sakyo-san for something last minute. The others said they had their fair share, not that I can’t somewhat emphasize with that. We went through hell for that play.”

You lean back, eyes staring at the ceiling lost in thought for a moment. “You had to do workouts for that one, right?”

“Mostly for our fights, yeah. I’ve never been sorer in my life though,” he mentions offhandedly while inserting the game.

You hum again. And maybe you should have left it at that, but the words come out faster than you can stop them. “…Did you feel any changes?”

“Mhm? I guess. It’s not like we managed to get abs, but we did have to work out like crazy. I don’t think I would have been able to endure that hadn’t it been for the stakes we were under.”

Stakes, uh.

You stare down and look at your body, mouth turning into a thin line. Your hand moves to your stomach, pinching it slightly, as if that would magically change into being good enough to fit your standards. Standards you had been trying to reach for weeks without results.

“Everything okay?”

Itaru is sitting next to you as he usually does when you come to spend time together, control at hand. You nod, ignoring his questioning eyes and focusing your attention on the glowing screen, the main characters slowly appearing one by one. “I’m fine. Are you done?”

He seems to catch your opposition to say anything more rather quickly, and even though it looks like there’s more he might want to say, he doesn’t. He simply stares at you talking for a few more seconds before turning his attention back to the screen, pressing finally start.

.

.

One knock. Two. Three.

“Itaru-san! Dinner is served, please come as soon as you can!”

You raise your head from your phone at the very same time your boyfriend curses, fingers moving impossibly fast over his control. You frown and look at the time. Was it already that late?

“Itaru.”

“Yeah.”

“Sakuya-kun called.”

“Ugh- shit why am I getting shot at from that angle.”

You stare at the blond actor. One didn’t have to be a genius to know he was completely absorbed in the game and hadn’t paid attention to a single thing you had said. Well, it wasn’t as if you hadn’t expected it anyway.

You nudge him.

“Itaru.” You try raising your voice. Usually it wouldn’t have meant anything, but it surprisingly manages to catch him off guard while that cute fairy seems to heal his character. You decide to be quick. “Sakuya-kun came. Dinner’s ready.”

“Ah, I’m tied up at the moment so you can go ahead and tell them I’ll arrive later.” He turns unbothered back to the game.

Once again, it went as expected. It wasn't the first time you would have had dinner with everyone at Mankai and then brought back a plate of dinner to his room.

Not this time though.

“I think I’ll call it a day and just go home. Try to not bother Chikage-san with your gaming.”

Itaru’s eyes are still glued to the screen game, so there is no way you could have noticed his eyebrows frowning. “The others have been asking for you,” he merely comments as he hears you collecting your things. “It’s been a while since you have stayed for dinner.”

You feel a prick of guilt. Because it’s true, and you aren’t happy about it either. “I’ve been kinda busy. Tell everyone I’ll try to come back soon.”

You are about to say goodbye and leave when you notice there’s no sound coming from the screen.

Itaru never pauses his games.

“...Is it because of your diet?”

You have spent so long ignoring the issue that you have no idea how to respond.

“...Just part of it." you mention quietly. You can’t help but feel like you have said something wrong. Or stupid. Or both.

After a few seconds you dare to turn, encountering the familiar pair of ruby orbs staring right at you, waiting for you while shining against the blue light provided by the computer. You look down at your nails, picking them and playing with them. “I… I guess I’m just tired of not seeing any improvement, you know?”

It wasn’t that you had become obsessed, but your weight has been something that has been eating you away at the back of your head for a while. Because you have been working hard. Incredibly hard. So why did you still feel so drained? Why was it still becoming more difficult to see yourself in the mirror?

“And I know no one is going to say anything, but, seeing everyone chatting so casually while I’m— god I sound so selfish.” You sit on the arm of the sofa and you rub away the sudden tears coming out of your eyes. “I don’t want anyone seeing me struggling, Itaru. Not you, not anyone. It’s… not worth it.”

You feel his hand being placed on your back. Your lip trembled because yeah, you are exhausted. A sob comes out. Then another one.

The spring member doesn’t say a word, merely letting you let everything out. Because he knows -of course he knows- that his eating habits are unhealthy. But he is physically gifted as people might say, so it’s not like he can pretend to know what you are going through.

What he knows is how it feels when one pays too much attention to their own self.

“Look—” he moves his hand where yours are and gives a little squeeze to catch your attention once you start to calm down. “We both know I’m not the best at this kind of thing not gonna lie, but… as you said, no one is going to think less of you. Much less me. In fact, I would say you have been pretty op all this time.”

There is a pinch in your stomach. Because part of the anxiety was the running thought of not being good enough. Your vision becomes teary again, and you shake your head.

“I’m not op at all.”

“You kidding? I’d definitely add you to my team on sight. I mean,” he nudges you, “no one in their right mind would choose to spend the whole afternoon listening to me cursing while gaming on my side of the room.”

“That you said you are going to clean,” you manage to add despite the situation.

“That I might clean at some point.” Itaru concedes. A smile reaches his mouth when he turns and looks at your frowning face, and so he gives your hand another squeeze. “I can pretty much imagine what I'm saying doesn't feel like right but… keep in mind you just need to work one step at a time. There’s no rush, Y/N.”

You slowly nod. He makes your name sound so special, so right. In the middle of the room, you feel the pressure built up for weeks in your mind starts to become less terrible as your lean on him.

One step at a time.

-

Tsumugi

Your lungs burned like hell.

You rest your hands on your knees to support yourself enough to calm down the heavy breathing. A few sweat drops fall to the floor.

“Remember to not stop until the end! You can do it, come on! Ten! Nine! Eight…!”

A low grunt is all you can attempt in the solitude of your living room. You stand up with effort and wince immediately. Yeah, that is definitely a cramp rising up your thigh.

“-And we are done, good job! That was all for today, remember to stretch before you get in the shower! If you liked this routine you can subscribe to my…”

You decide to pay no more attention at the overly-enthusiastic trainer’s voice coming from the computer -who has the audacity to be smiling as if they hadn’t been jumping with you for the last forty-five minutes by the way- and close it unceremoniously, still hoping to gain back a quarter of your lost breath and cardiac rhythm.

Damn, even your ears rang.

With heavy steps you make your way to the table, gulping down the entire glass of water.

“Maybe I should try different exercises…” you mumble as you head to the bathroom. God knows you smelled incredibly gross by now and honestly, the thought of a warm shower was more than a little appealing.

It’s not working.

The words almost seem to come from anywhere but your mind, given the way they make you halt. Then there’s the familiar twist in your stomach -because it’s not the first time. And while part of your brain begs for you to ignore them, you can’t help turning slightly to the side, finding your reflection staring back. You press your lips together.

Dismantled hair. Tummy. Flushed face. Thighs. Breathless, as always.

It’s not working.

Why wasn’t it working?

Beneath the spray of the shower you allow yourself a moment of reprieve. The head is a little old, the pressure stuttering every so often as it hisses against the bathroom tiles, but it’s a welcome distraction from the sting that begins at the back of your eyes. You shake your head, blinking to get rid of the teary vision.

You force yourself to get rid of your thoughts and focus on the task at hand, trying to ignore the devil on your shoulder.

.

.

“Y/N?”

You blink at the familiar voice, reverting back to your actual surroundings. The sun is up high, and the fresh smell of flowers reaches your senses. Blue eyes stare back at you.

Right. You were in Mankai.

“Sorry, Tsumugi. What did you say?”

Your boyfriend merely offers a sweet smile while pointing with his chin the bag resting at your feet. “The soil. Can you put some here while I bring the geraniums? The space is pretty much done.”

You do as instructed, crouching down next to him while trying not to dirt him anymore than he already was, only half listening to him thanking you for coming to help on your day off.

You notice he’s wearing the overall you bought him not too long ago. And while it’s undeniably dirty from transplanting plants and kneeling on the ground, it still suits him -you think. Tsumugi always felt like he belonged in a flower garden. Flower guardian was it what everyone called him?

“Maybe we could go to that new coffee shop that opened near the station after this.” The winter leader keeps talking while placing the last bits of soil you spread around the bedflower. “Banri-kun told me it had really good reviews.”

“Sure.” you nod a few seconds later, missing the way Tsumugi’s eyes lay on you. “What me to bring the watering can?” you mention while getting up from your position -or you would have, hadn’t it been for the soreness on your body. You grunt out loud. You really should have stretched yesterday.

“Ah, it’s okay, I’ll get it. You look tired.” It’s not really recrimination, more like an offhanded statement. A soft ‘maybe it would be better for you to rest at home after all.’

“I’m fine.” You insist. You walk a few steps and lift the watering can. He doesn’t say anything else, so you proceed to give him the gardening tool and crouch next to him again, hugging your knees. Neither of you speaks for a while. “In any case I’ve been letting myself down lately, so that’s on me.”

Tsumugi’s hands stop moving for a second, eyebrows frowning slightly at your comment.

“…I see.” His tone doesn’t change, resuming to pat lightly the ground to level equally the soil around the newly planted flowers. He doesn’t force you to say anything more than that -he never does- but while you watch him tend the last remnants of the garden and hear the far tweet of the birds, you feel like you should provide a context for such a random sentence. A sudden lump rises in your throat.

“I’ve been struggling with my weight.”

It’s not like you had been secretive about it either. Though you are sure he didn’t know it had come up to this point. Tsumugi nods.

“How long?”

How has it been since you have been feeling like this?

“It’s not everyday.” you say slowly, carefully evading the question. You can feel the worry in his voice, and you kick yourself mentally for it. Maybe you shouldn’t have brought it up after all. “It’s just. I guess I just wanted to… know what it’s like. To feel good about oneself.”

Because it isn’t -has never- been an easy topic.

“But it just— doesn’t seem to work, you know?” You laugh, high and strained. “And I— I run, and run, and exercise, and end up feeling like dying only to find our nothing changes.”

There’s a soft swift and shuffle around you. And a second later you feel a familiar hand resting on yours, thumb caressing it. You let go a shaky breath. Maybe it’s the blue-haired’s calming presence, or maybe you have reached a limit enough to not care. Either way, it doesn’t matter. You lean into his arms, and the words flow.

“I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like— like it’s never going to get better, no matter how much I try. I hate feeling like this Tsumugi. I hate it.”

There’s another moment of silence. You are aware you are resting on him while crouching next to the half-done bedflower -not the most ideal position- but he doesn’t move. You can feel his warmth, his smell, and the way he has carefully begun to caress down your back.

“You have been working hard.” his voice the quietest you’d ever heard. You purse your lips and sniff, containing a sob down your throat. It’s stupid to get so emotional after hearing such a thing, but you are sure the tears would appear if you look at him.

He notices your restraint. Of course he does. He didn’t study psychology for nothing. “You… know I’m not good with technology, right?”

In the midst of things happening the statement manages to confuse you, but you don’t say anything, hear still buried on his neck. He keeps talking, not bothered by your silence. “I’ve always tried to understand how mobiles and computers work. It’s a constant struggle, and even with everyone’s help it always seems like I’m at square one so I… talked about Kazunari-kun about it some time ago. Director and Sakyo-san want us to interact with fans more often and I didn’t want to bring everyone’s efforts down. It took us the whole day to be able to upload something from my part.”

“For the writing blog?” you couldn’t help but ask. Tsumugi chuckles tiredly, probably reliving the moment in his head.

“Yeah. You have seen it, right? Even with all the time spent the photos were still blurry and I uploaded them to the wrong place twice. I had become dejected because I truly had given my all, and was about to apologize when he started giving me a surprisingly amount of compliments.”

“I was confused at first. But then he told me not to worry because we weren’t in a hurry to reach anywhere, and that we would be faking it till we made it.”

“Fake it till you make it?” you repeat, lifting your head slightly. That was such a Kazunari thing to say.

Tsumugi moves, helping you both stand up. Your body sighed feeling blood once again circulating through your legs.

“There’s no deadline for when you don’t want to give up no matter how much one has failed on the way, Y/N. And if there’s someone I know will always give their all, is you.”

“But—”

“I know it’s not easy,” he concedes. “But you have been doing your best all this time I think it would be a pity for your effort to go to waste. Let’s take smaller steps at a time. Maybe we can all try to think of ways to help you together.

He cups your face with his hands, caressing it with his thumbs. “You are not alone, Y/N.”

You are still not sure. It’s a difficult feeling. But his blue eyes soften when you finally look at him. And for once in a long time you find comfort in the simplicity of knowing - oh. Maybe it’s going to be alright.

_________________________________________________________

Wishing you all a wonderful day! 💕