#and then they all lived happily ever after
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Brienne of Frickin' Tarth!!!! best girl!! best girl brienne!!!!
Oh my god oh my god oh my god but thinking about Brienne and how she didn’t reject her femininity by choice but everyone else rejected it for her because she wasn’t conventionally attractive so the only role she felt she could fit in to in society’s eyes was that of a warrior and how she was in love with Renly because he was nice to her and danced with her and treated her how all the other girls her age were treated even if it was just for a night and how she never feels like she fits in as a woman because she’s ugly but she never fits in as a man because she isn’t a man but she can’t go back now that she knows what its like to be free from those constraints but there is still a small part of her that wonders what it would be like if maybe, just maybe… and I just… George had absolutely no right to write a character that good
#brienne of tarth#asoiaf#god i love brienne shes the absolute goddamn best character ever.#For all the obvious reasons but also her story really really really appeals to me as a trans woman.#like omg!!! shes just like me fr!!!#this post is exactly why her entire story works so well as a transfem allegory. (you put it more eloquently than i ever could have though!)#like obviously brienne herself isnt a trans woman and theres no way gurm was even thinking about it like that when he wrote it but still#that scene where she pours her heart out to the elder brother!!! i swear to god ive never felt so fucking seen#your honor! shes just like me fr!#i even get to the point where like#i find it strange that so many people think Brienne's whole thing is like amazing revolutionary characterisation written by gurm#when like these feelings of Brienne's are literally my whole entire life experience?#so her complicated relationship to her gender actually really doesnt feel very out-there or revolutionary to me??#cause its literally almost all of my own gender feelings/memories!! on paper!!#i probably might sound like a smug asshole saying that - i hope you see what i mean?? no idea if anyone else feels the same way#i probably sound like one of those weirdos whos obsessed with patrick bateman lol i promise its not like that#i just love the characters of brienne samwell arya tyrion bran sansa joncon etc etc etc theyre so so so important and special to me.#this goddamn book series man#to think i almost didnt even get into it. like i got so close to never picking up the books at all lol#i only looked into ASOIAF in the first place cause someone got my name mixed up with one of the characters lol#if not for that i might never have read it!!#real talk though im fr worried that Brienne might not survive the series#even if she doesnt though itll still all be worth it just to know her and see her in action.#a true knight fighting for whats right! no chance and no fuckin' choice baby!!!#so even if she does die defending jaime from the brotherhood or die in the long night or whatever#it will ALL be worth it. “Men's lives have meaning not their deaths."#if brienne does die in book 6 or 7 i fully trust gurm to give her the most fitting possible death for her character arc.#Doesn't mean i wont cry for weeks!!!! But still!! 100% trust in gurm that he'll deliver excellent beautiful closure for her story.#My dream is that brienne will end up making the best sweetest most wholesome sisterly friendship ever with Sansa Arya Jeyne Poole etc#and in the end she lives happily ever after in winterfell with the stark girlies their brothers and assorted friendos. And Pod of course!
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i think one reason why so many people fail to understand andrew and neil's relationship is because people don't know what it is to be aspec. and obviously the aspec umbrella is wide and varied and no one size fits all, but at the heart of their relationship, neil is demisexual. and i fully believe andrew is some form of aromantic. and obviously their shared history of trauma (of all kinds) colors their relationship and their sexualities and actions. but aspec people (and the people in relationships with those aspec people) develop such different relationships than allo people. they care differently, and it's often the care that becomes most important, rather than (just) the attraction. like yes, i choose you because i see you because i am interested in you because i don't quite understand you but i want to, i need to, and i am committed to sticking around regardless of whether we are a legal partnership or not.
people argue all the time that andreil would grow to say i love you some day, that they'd eventually heal enough to get married, but that isn't healing. that's ignoring a vital part of each of them. not only are they both still learning what love is, but love is not what their relationship is built around. they did not ~FaLl In LoVE~ they built a partnership around taking care of the other person. sure they were attracted to each other in their own ways, but andrew doesn't look at neil like he's his happily ever after romance. neil is the person who wants andrew to live, who wants andrew to be happy, who wants andrew to know that he has value even when he's not a good person. and andrew is the person who wants neil to be safe, who wants neil to be happy, who wants neil to know that he has value even when he isn't playing exy. their "romance" comes from holding each other up, from calling each other on their shit, from being a safe space when the world has proven it is anything but. neil is the one who almost starts to imagine some kind of long-term partnership in such conventional terms and andrew is so unconcerned with what that partnership looks like...he just knows the two of them will continue holding each other up as long as they can. and sure they'll have sex and sleep in the same bed and get cats together and all that "romantic" shit, but it's more than romance. it's a life. it's security. it's a chance to rewrite the trauma of their pasts.
and yeah to an outsider all that is romantic, sure. but i don't think andrew and neil see it like that. their relationships is all facts and truths. they feel safest in these absolutes, in the trust they are building together, in the shared language they are crafting between tentative touches and long stares. but to label it something as banal as ~romance~ undersells just what's happening to them. they don't need to say i love you because they know that all of these pieces that make up their shared life together say that for them, and they wouldn't know what to do with those words anyway. their "love" is not the same as other people's anyway. they don't need to get married because anniversaries and dates and marriages minimize just how long forever is, and they are already joined together by the understanding they share.
if the two of them got married or started "dating" it would send the wrong message to people who will never understand. neil isn't andrew's ~boyfriend~ he's the man who convinced him that life can interesting enough to stick around for. andrew isn't neil's ~lover~ he's the man who refused to let him run away from the life he always wanted. it's not romantic, it's survival. it's selflessness. it's learning how to care for yourself by caring for someone else and letting them care for you.
#SORRY i just have a lot of ANDREW IS ARO thoughts bouncing around my head#seed and mish and i kept talking about andreil today and i just wanna smash my head through a wall.#aftg#andreil#me: is this anything what if this is bad#like somedays i wonder if i understand andreil at all#but like....i do i do#not to say that aspec people have galaxy brains who are bigger and better than romance and allo partnership but like...#if the shoe fits....#mine
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I'm Your Man
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caleb x fem!reader
summary: riling up your boyfriend is entirely too easy. when he finds out you have a tutor that happens to be a man... well, it's safe to say caleb hates that sort of thing.
cw: nsfw (18+) - mdni!!, smut, fluff, kissing, spanking, oral sex, vaginal fingering, p in v, praise kink, finger sucking, exhibitionism, jealous!caleb, established relationship, modern au
w/c: 5.8k
a/n: *caleb seeing reader near a guy* crashes out immediately - hope you all enjoy!! <3
also on ao3!
“Baby!”
You squeak when the door swings open, the man in front of you moving in a blur. There’s a pair of lips landing against your cheek in a quick kiss before he wraps his arms around you, lifting you up off of the ground, his faze nuzzling into your chest.
“C- Caleb,” you whine, squirming in his hold, trying to get him to set you back down, “put me down, you dork.”
“But I missed you,” Caleb grumbles back, rubbing his face all over your top like a cat, nuzzling into your chest. He finally grants your request once he’s satisfied, hands smoothing down over your sides once he sets you down onto your feet.
You smile when he cups your cheeks, humming happily when he begins to pepper soft kisses all over your face, his thumbs smoothing over your skin gently.
“I missed you too,” you say, arms wrapping around his neck to tug him down for a kiss, sighing softly against his mouth.
Caleb groans, his hands squeezing at your waist, kissing you back eagerly. You huff out a laugh when he gropes at your ass, rocking up onto your tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek.
“That’s it?” he protests when you pull away, pushing your hands away when you try to tug your duffle bag into his apartment.
“I literally just got here,” you muse, watching as he grabs your bag for you, teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you silently appreciate the flex of your boyfriend’s biceps as he carries your duffle bag into his bedroom for you.
You shut his front door, securing the lock, before trailing after him. Caleb is reaching for you the moment you step inside his bedroom, shoving his face into the crook of your neck and letting out a contented sigh.
“Missed you so much,” he sighs, voice muffled with the way he’s pressed his face against your neck, his nose digging into you, lips brushing over your skin.
“Sometimes I wonder how you live without me,” you tease, hands stroking over his hair gently, scratching his scalp every now and then.
“I hardly get by,” Caleb complains aggrievedly, tugging you towards his bed. “I think I have withdrawals every time you leave.”
A laugh slips out of you at that, crawling up to snuggle into his arms, leaning back to rest your head on his shoulder. Caleb kisses your cheek, his chest warm and firm against your back as he hums in satisfaction.
“I only have a year left before I graduate, then I can move in with you,” you remind him, scrolling through your phone absentmindedly as Caleb busies himself with trying to meld his body against yours.
“Feels like an eternity,” he mutters, huffing out a breath. Caleb props his chin on your shoulder, eyes trained on your phone as you watch some random video. “How are your classes anyways?”
“Not bad,” you say, tilting your head to press a soft kiss to his lips. “I was struggling in one of them, but I sorted that out.”
“Yeah?” he murmurs, pecking your lips gently in return, “how’d you do that?”
“I got a tutor,” you shrug, glancing up at him before turning your attention back to your phone. “He’s pretty good.”
You can feel Caleb stiffening behind you, his fingers stopping their movements against your sides. Your brows furrow, tossing your phone somewhere in front of you before turning back to look at Caleb properly. There’s a tell-tale pout beginning to form on his lips; something you’ve gotten used to ever since you were children.
“What’s wrong?”
“He?” Caleb echoes, his eyes darkening, “your tutor’s a guy?”
“Well… yeah?” you reply like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, “the dude is like super smart; top of the class and everything. I figured he’d be the best to teach me.”
“I’m super smart,” Caleb shoots back, and you raise your brows when you see a frown coming across his face, his lips turning downwards. “And I was the top of all my classes. Definitely smarter than your little tutor. Drop him.”
A laugh bubbles out of you, turning around his arms until you settle on his lap, thighs straddling his hips.
“Yeah?” you smile, peering up at him, “you don’t even know the syllabus, Caleb.”
“I can learn it,” he protests stubbornly, “besides, I am smart. I’m a fighter pilot, baby.”
Your smile widens when you see Caleb’s chest puff out a little, his proud nature showing - not that you minded. Your fingers smooth up over the back of his shoulders, a soft sigh escaping Caleb when you play with the hair at the nape of his neck, his head tipping back, eyes fluttering shut.
“You can just say it,” you whisper teasingly, pressing yourself a little closer. “You’re jealous.”
“Jealous?” Caleb echoes, his lips pursing as he considers your words. “Maybe,” he shrugs, his eyes opening as he stares down at you, “or maybe…” he whispers, lowering his head to brush a kiss across your lips, “maybe I just want to keep my girl to myself.”
Your cheeks flush when he calls you his girl, heart fluttering in your chest. The words echo in your mind, brushing whatever thoughts were filling your mind away. He always knew how to disarm you, and you can never quite get used to Caleb’s possessiveness, his need to have his claim on you. It’s thrilling and nothing else has ever made you feel so wanted.
“Hm?” Caleb hums against your cheek, “my girl is all mine. Right, baby?”
Hands pawing at his firm chest, you nod, leaning into him as though in a daze. You lean up, making a small noise, trying to kiss him. Caleb clicks his tongue, his hand cupping your jaw, fingers squeezing gently on either side of your cheeks to bring you out of the slow, syrupy haze that was currently fogging your mind.
“Use your words, sweetheart.”
“Yes- yes,” you say insistently, pouting before you pucker up your lips a little more, desperate for a kiss, “‘m all yours, Caleb.”
“Good girl.”
You preen at the praise, mewling softly when he kisses you. Caleb’s hands squeeze at your hips gently, trying to stop all of your squirming and jostling on top of his lap. A dissatisfied sound leaves you when he stops you from grinding across his lap, your eyes narrowing as you peer up at him.
“I thought you missed me, Caleb.”
He rolls his eyes, grabbing your hand that was currently sliding down his chest, his lips pressing against your palm when he manages to unfurl the fist you’d made with your fingers.
“You’re so grabby,” Caleb mumbles against your palm, “‘m tryna take it slow, baby.”
“I don’t want slow,” you huff out, fisting his shirt and yanking him towards you. “I want you to fuck me.”
There’s a smirk on Caleb’s lips, his nose nudging against yours, fingers pressing into your back.
“Last time you cried when I-”
“Shut up!” you sputter, slapping your hand over his mouth, cheeks hot with embarrassment when you remember what had happened last time. Caleb’s hand wrapped around your throat, fingers relentless against your clit, cock pounding entirely too deep- “That was- it was overwhelming!”
Caleb opens his mouth to respond, mischief glinting in his eyes, but your phone ruins the moment, ringing out. You groan, turning your back to him as you reach for your phone that you had tossed over to the foot of his bed.
“Who is it?” Caleb asks, his fingers wrapping around your ankles as you kick up your legs lazily.
“My tutor,” you reply, showing him your phone.
A smile spreads across your face when you see Caleb’s playful expression drop, replaced with something akin to annoyance.
“You know,” you continue, your voice dipping into a drawling taunt just to piss him off, “bet he’d fuck me if I asked him.”
“You little-” Caleb hisses, his voice rising as he tries to grab for your phone.
You pull it out of his reach, pressing a finger to your lips, making a hushing motion. Caleb’s expression grows darker the moment you swipe your finger across the screen to answer, his hands tightening their grip on your ankles.
“Hi,” you chirp sweetly, twirling a strand of hair around your finger.
“Uh hey,” the man on the other end of the line replies, “are you free to talk?”
You hum, sneaking a glance towards Caleb who seems close to snapping, his glare venomous when he catches your eyes. Too easy, you think, biting your lip to stifle a laugh at his thinly veiled anger.
“Super free,” you say pointedly, “what did you want to talk abo- ow!”
A sharp yelp escapes you when Caleb’s hand comes down on your ass, the slap stinging. A strangled whine escapes you, your head whipping around to glare back at Caleb, feeling your eye twitch. Your boyfriend meets your eyes with a hard glare of his own, his fingers pushing up the hem of your skirt to examine the rapidly reddening skin of your ass.
“You okay?” your tutor asks, a tinge of concern in his voice.
“F- fine,” you manage out, “just- just um- stubbed my toe!”
“Right,” he murmurs, “hate when that happens.”
You nod along as though he can see you, trying to kick Caleb in the face as you roll over onto your back. The wind is knocked out of you when Caleb grabs you by the waist, manhandling you until you’re laying on your front again, his hands squeezing at your ass roughly, hand coming down again in a harsh smack.
“Ouch!”
“You uh- you stubbed your toe again?” your tutor asks tentatively.
“Mhm,” you say, voice slightly breathless with the restraint it was taking you not to cry out. “I’m- ‘m just really clumsy.”
Your fingers tremble as you manage to mute yourself on your phone, letting out a whimper when Caleb spanks you again and again, a hint of regret pooling inside of you at pushing your boyfriend this far.
“Unmute,” Caleb murmurs, gripping your hips to make you arch a bit, ass up in the air for him to spank again, your skin hot and prickly. His voice is a low snap when you don’t do as he says, your throat bobbing as you swallow harshly, Caleb’s tone growing firmer, no longer requesting but demanding. “C’mon baby, unmute the fucking phone.”
You whine in protest, but do as he says, shakily unmuting yourself. You can hardly hear whatever your tutor was rambling on about, eyes blinking rapidly to try and concentrate. It’s all in vain however, when Caleb rains down another slap to your ass, your teeth sinking into your forearm to muffled a pained gasp.
“Bad fucking girl,” Caleb mutters lowly, “such a bratty, little slut.”
The itch to argue and bite back prickles across your skin, but Caleb’s hands are smoothing over you ass, and you wiggle your hips back to meet the soft pets he rewards your ass with; his fingers prodding and pushing your ass cheeks apart to take a glimpse of your panties.
“Anyways,” your tutor continues, “I was just calling because my schedule’s changed so I might not be able to tutor you during the time we agreed on.”
“Oh,” you breathe out, eyes widening as Caleb tugs at your panties, pulling them away from your skin before he lets go, the elastic snapping back against your skin. “That’s- that’s uh- too bad?”
“Yeah,” he sighs, “do you mind if we settle on a different day?”
There’s an answer sitting on the tip of your tongue, but Caleb pulls at your ankle, managing to flip you over onto your back. He tightens his grip, your body sliding against the sheets as he tugs you towards him.
“N- no,” you hiss, forgetting about the man on the other end of the line, too preoccupied by trying to simultaneously yank your leg free whilst trying to kick Caleb’s face, “don’t you dare!”
Caleb only gives you a lazy grin, his hands managing to catch both your ankles and tug you further down the bed.
“Don’t you dare?” your tutor echoes confusedly, and you squeeze your eyes shut, wincing at the misunderstanding.
You laugh, trying to cover up your flustered state, head dropping back against the sheets as Caleb smiles against the soles of your feet, peppering kisses all over the expanse of your feet.
“That’s not what I meant,” you grit out, shaking your head vehemently when Caleb smooths his hands over your thighs, pushing your skirt up to expose your panties.
You can feel your brain short-circuiting when your boyfriend settles between your thighs, his hands grasping at your thighs, squeezing at the fat before he turns his head, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh.
“So you’re okay with me rescheduling?”
“Y- yes!” you say, your voice pitching upwards awkwardly when Caleb rubs his fingers over your clothed cunt, his head dipping down to press kisses to your damp panties.
“Great,” he says, sounding a little chipper, “how does Friday sound? Maybe 10-12 in the morning?”
“Oh fuck,” you breathe out hazily, fingers brushing through Caleb’s hair as he pulls your panties down your legs, your half-lidded gaze not missing the way he slips them into the pocket of his sweats - another addition to his growing collection.
Perv.
You sigh, biting your lip as Caleb kisses your puffy folds, his tongue sliding through them after, your grip on your phone loosening as you squeeze your breast, squirming under Caleb’s ministrations.
He stares up at you, pulling back to lick his lips, strings of slick clinging to his lips and chin. You smile hazily and Caleb leans forward, stealing a quick kiss before burying his face back into your aching pussy.
“Uh- does that sound good?” your tutor asks, his voice sounding a little unsure with all the sighing and soft noises you were let out.
“So good,” you murmur absentmindedly, thighs squeezing around Caleb’s head gently, enough to tease him a little.
Caleb gives you a pointed stare, his teeth sinking into your thigh before he smirks, nodding towards your phone.
You flush, embarrassment making your body go hot. “I- I mean y- yeah! That sounds perfect!”
“Okay, let me just write that down-”
You tug at Caleb’s hair, mouth dropping open when he latches onto your clit, sucking harshly. The sensations make your thighs twitch, toes curling as they press up against Caleb’s broad back, a soft mewl leaving you when you see the flex of his muscles through his shirt.
“Pretty pussy missed me,” Caleb whispers, his voice barely audible. He sighs contentedly when he thumbs apart your folds, the sheets rustling slightly as you watch him grind his hips into the bed, Caleb’s eyes not wavering from the clench of your pussy around nothing. “So wet, hm? Gonna ruin my sheets, baby.”
You whimper when he draws back, thighs twitching when he gathers a considerable amount of spit in his mouth, spitting down onto your clenching pussy. It’s filthy really, but Caleb is well-versed in your body; knows you well enough to know that you’ll go along with whatever he offers you.
Your fingers push at his head gently when he tries to kiss your clit, moving your hand down to spread your pussy for him instead, rubbing his spit into your cunt, mixing it with your slick. Caleb lets out a low groan at the sight, and you smile prettily, pressing your wet fingers against his mouth, smearing it over his lips.
His tongue lolls out soon after, licking his lips and you feed him your fingers, hips rolling up needily when he sucks on your fingers lazily. “Want you to cum for me on call,” Caleb slurs, licking between your fingers, grazing his teeth against the pads of them.
“What?” you hiss, brows raising incredulously. “I am not doing that.”
Caleb ignores you, busying himself with burying his face back into your cunt. You stifle a moan, biting down on your lip hard enough to remind yourself that you shouldn’t have been doing this; be on a call whilst your boyfriend was eating you out.
“I was thinking we could meet up at the library.”
Your tutor’s voice breaks through the haze and you grit your teeth, silently regretting the fact that you’d been the one to start this whole ordeal in the first place.
“The- ah- the library sounds good,” you mumble, eyes squeezing shut when Caleb begins to double his efforts, sucking and slurping, the sounds entirely too lewd and perhaps audible to the man on the phone. “
You press down on Caleb’s head, fingers tangling with his hair, back arching. Caleb’s smile is obvious, you can feel it against your cunt, his head tilting as he prods at your aching hole, beginning to fuck you with his tongue. A shudder racks through you, an impatient whine slipping out of you, desperate to orgasm.
“Be good, baby,” Caleb murmurs, replacing his tongue with his fingers, curling them up inside of you.
You try to stifle a moan and Caleb is feeling nice enough to help you, his free hand sliding up over your stomach, squeezing at your tits appreciatively before stuffing his fingers into your mouth to muffle your noises.
Legs jerking, you try to hold still, but when Caleb latches back onto your clit, your entire body quakes. It’s torture, the way Caleb knows how to play with you, his mouth smashing against your dripping pussy to suck more feverishly to drive you further towards the edge.
“The library it is then,” your tutor notes down. “Or you could always come over.”
Come over. Come. Cum. Cum?
A drunken giggle slips out of you, fingers running through Caleb’s soft hair as he flicks his tongue against your clit, stroking over it gently before his mouth suctions around the swollen bud, making your back arch. Yeah, you think hazily, you were going to cum.
“Mhm,” you slur, “‘m definitely gonna be cumming.”
“You- you are?” he sounds a little surprised, “you know, I’ve never had someone so eager to learn. It’s actually kinda… refreshing, honestly so thank you.”
“You’re so welcome,” you mewl, hips rocking up against Caleb’s face, feeling the huff of laughter your boyfriend lets out against your pussy, his hand coming down to spread you apart for him again, his fingers thrusting in and out of you faster.
You bite down on your lip, body seizing up when Caleb crooks his fingers inside of you just right, the sensation of his tongue on your clit enough to have your back arching, toes digging into Caleb’s back as you cum.
Caleb groans, kissing your clit sloppily, his tongue sliding through your puffy folds to drink up every last drop of slick that he could find. He laps over your pussy, nuzzling into your thigh after as you shudder and shake, kissing your hip to help soothe you through the aftermath of your orgasm.
You’re too boneless to stop Caleb from reaching for your phone, eyes fluttering shut, unable to stop the syrupy atmosphere that had befallen you.
“Hung up for you,” he murmurs, putting your phone somewhere, his lips landing on your cheek for a sweet kiss.
“I didn’t get to say bye to him,” you mumble belatedly, arms wrapping around Caleb’s neck lazily.
Caleb clicks his tongue, sending you a half-hearted glare. “You don’t need to say bye to him, baby. Stop thinking about him. I just made you cum on my tongue.”
“But he’s just so helpful,” you sigh lazily, feeling Caleb’s fingers dig into your hips.
“For fuck’s sake,” Caleb mutters, rolling his eyes, “I’m helpful and I’m your fucking boyfriend.”
You smile up at him, tugging him down to kiss him. Caleb lets out a low noise against your lips, his hands squeezing at your waist, shuddering when you scratch his scalp.
“You don’t have to be so butthurt, baby,” you coo, sitting up, “I still love you.”
“Not enough apparently,” Caleb grouses, tugging his shirt up over his head.
You go hazy eyed at the sight, hand running up over your boyfriend’s defined abdomen, your fingers catching on his dog tags situated between his unfairly thick pecs.
“Gonna fuck me now?” you ask him sweetly, tugging his sweats and boxers down to free his cock.
Caleb’s cock bobs free and you sigh dreamily at the sight, the head of it wet with thick globs of pre-cum; damning evidence of his arousal. Your hand wraps around his fat cock, the length hot and throbbing under your touch.
It’s all too much for Caleb who lets out a shuddering noise, his head dropping forward, resting against your shoulder as you stroke his cock lazily, leaning forward to spit on it. Caleb whines and you take the opportunity to lean forward, mouthing at his pecs, pressing open-mouthed kisses across his heated skin.
“Fuck, baby,” Caleb sighs, hands coming up to cradle your head against his chest, his cock twitching in your hands when you reach down to squeeze at his balls, your teeth scraping across his sternum playfully.
“Missed your cock,” you whisper, rising up onto your knees to kiss up his neck. “‘s just so big and thick,” you say appreciatively.
“Do you even think about me?” Caleb protests, his head tipping to the side to bare more of his neck to you, “or do you just think about my fat fuckin’ cock?”
“It’s not a crime to think about it,” you huff out, angling your head to kiss the underside of his jaw. “I just really like it.”
“Brat,” he mutters, reaching down to grope your ass. “You sound like you have a crush on my cock.”
“You steal my panties!” you shoot back exasperatedly, glaring up at him before biting down on his shoulder in retaliation.
“Maybe I just really like the cute little designs,” Caleb drawls, yanking your head back using your hair before dipping his head to kiss you messily, his tongue invading your mouth, practically fucking you with it until there’s spit leaking from the sides of your mouths.
You moan, pawing at his broad shoulders, mewling happily when he manhandles you to his will, turning you over onto your front, his hands tugging your ass up into the air, making you arch for him.
“Good fucking girl,” he snarls, landing a spank to your ass. “Ask for my cock, sweetheart, c’mon.”
You whimper, face shoving into the sheets, grabbing at them to try and ground yourself. The sounds of Caleb stroking his cock making your pussy throb, hips wiggling back to try and make him push his cock inside.
“W- want it inside,” you demand, yelping when Caleb smacks your ass again.
“Think you can do better than that,” Caleb murmurs, his hand smoothing up over your back, his cock slapping against your aching cunt, before he presses the tip of it in before drawing it back out. “Hm? Wanna hear you all pretty, baby.”
“P- please?” you hiccup, feeling desperate tears prick at your lash line - a sign of your own desperation and need to have him close, no, in you. “C- can I p- please have your cock, Caleb? Please?”
“You sound so sweet when you ask like that,” Caleb says dreamily, dipping his head to reward your cheek with a kiss. “I love you so much, sweetheart.”
A shaky breath escapes you, your cheek squishing against the sheets, eyes slipping shut when he sinks his cock inside of you. You’ve slept with Caleb countless times, but you can never get quite used to the stretch of his cock and the way it manages to turn every rational thought in your mind to mush.
Caleb doesn’t seem to be faring better, letting out a guttural groan as he buries himself into the hilt. You can’t help but think he’s being a little louder than usual, but you’re not complaining.
“So tight,” he rasps hoarsely, fingers spreading apart your ass to watch his cock sink in and out of you, his eyes silently appreciating the way your cunt is stretched out around his cock. “Feels so good, baby.”
You mumble something back incoherently, content to let him have you like this, his hips smacking into your ass loudly with every thrust he delivers.
“Love you, Caleb,” you mewl when you feel him kiss up your back and over your shoulder, his face pressing into the crook of your neck, “love you much.”
“I know, sweetheart,” he soothes, drawing his hips back before driving them into you harder and faster, “so good to me, aren’t you?”
“Mhm,” you nod, rising up onto your hands, turning your head to kiss him, “‘m your good girl.”
Caleb grunts, his arm wrapping around your waist. “You weren’t being good when you were talking to him.”
You pout, too horny to roll your eyes and tell him that he was being wildly immature and entirely too possessive for his own good. Instead, you squirm forward, Caleb’s cock slipping out of you despite his protests.
“Should I make it up to you?” you ask sweetly, voice lilting as you bat your lashes up at him.
“Make it up to me?” Caleb echoes, his breath hitching when you crawl towards him, hips swaying a little, your hands pushing at his shoulders to get him to lay down.
You hum in response, crawling up over him, settling on his lap. You smile when he groans loudly, your hips rolling as you grind your pussy over his hard, aching cock.
“Ride me,” he mutters dazedly, pre-cum coating his abdomen. “Sink down on my cock and ride me, baby.”
“I’m enjoying this though,” you say teasingly, hands planted firmly on his chest as you roll your hips again, moaning softly when his cock slides through your folds, the tip of it catching on your clit. “W- wait- Caleb!”
You squeak when he grabs for you roughly, picking you up easily, dropping you down onto his cock. A sharp cry escapes you, cunt clenching around him in a desperate attempt to get accustomed to his size.
“‘m gonna fuck the brattiness outta you,” Caleb murmurs, his lips slotting over yours to seal the promise. “And then-” he moans, his head tipping back slightly as he guides you to rock your hips, feeling your cunt around his throbbing cock, “and then, you’re gonna scream my name while you cum.”
You wrap your arms around his neck, gasping as he begins to bounce you on his cock, your ass smacking against his thighs. You don’t need much encouragement, not when Caleb’s mouth is sucking and biting at your neck, most likely leaving numerous hickeys in his wake.
“Who's making you feel this good?” your boyfriend asks, “huh, baby?”
“Y- you are!” you squeal when he slaps your ass, hugging his head as he buries his face into your chest, his mouth sucking at your nipple before switching over to the other breast, biting a mark into the fat of it.
“That’s right,” Caleb growls, “I am, not anyone else. Just me and my cock, yeah?”
“Yes- yes! Oh fuck- hah- C- Caleb!”
He snarls, pulling you down, breasts squishing up against his chest. You squirm, hardly able to believe you’d manage to piss him off into such a state. Caleb wraps his arms around you, his knees bending as he plants his feet firmly against his bed, beginning to thrust up into you.
“S- so deep,” you hiccup, pressing sloppy kisses to his jaw, “you’re the best.”
Caleb groans, his heart fluttering at your words, a light flush covering his cheeks. Despite everything, your words still manage to fluster him, the softness of your lips on his cheek making his body throb with affection.
He manages to tilt his head, capturing your lips with his, uncaring that your kisses were slightly clumsy and uncoordinated with how fucked out you were. You whimper when he quickens his pace, cock pounding into you, his balls slapping against your ass.
“‘m gonna c- cum,” you whine, pussy clenching down around his cock desperately.
“Yeah?” Caleb rasps, kissing the corner of your mouth, “gonna cum on my cock, sweetheart?”
You nod rapidly, nuzzling into the crook of his neck, letting out a contented coo. Caleb grunts out your name, his fingers reaching down to squeeze at your ass, fucking up into you over and over again until you squeal and scream, his name leaving your mouth in a slurred chant.
“C- Caleb! I- ah! I love you!”
“Cum,” Caleb snaps, burying himself into the hilt, his hand managing to find your clit. You whine when he rubs it, body shuddering on top of his as you cum, your nails digging into his broad shoulders. “There you go, baby.”
You let out a dazed sound when Caleb kisses you, lips pressing together sloppily, his cock twitching inside of you.
“Fuck,” Caleb mutters, his body covered in a thin sheen of sweat, his thighs trembling slightly as his hot, thick cum floods your pussy. “So good to me, sweetheart.”
You flop down onto the bed, chest rising and falling as you pant raggedly, Caleb’s softening cock slipping out of you. His cum smears across your thigh when he moves towards you, his face pressing into your chest as he kisses your breasts, sucking a nipple into his mouth playfully until you push at his head in protest.
“I should rile you up more,” you muse, fingers tracing over his lips gently, a triumphant smile on your face.
Caleb rolls his eyes, kissing the pads of your fingers. “Maybe you should,” he concedes finally, running a hand through his hair, looking a little weary, his cheeks flushed prettily.
You cup his cheeks, pulling him closer to pepper kisses over his face, to his cheeks, forehead and brows, laughing when he returns your kisses and sucks the fat of your cheek into his mouth childishly.
“Y’all are freaks.”
The smile on your face fades, the color all but draining from your face when you hear a crackly voice coming from your phone. You glance towards Caleb, and the asshole in question looks entirely too smug and pleased, a lazy grin spread out across his face.
The cozy intimate atmosphere around you seems to fade, annoyance flitting across your face. You have half a mind to slap Caleb across the face, your jaw clenching as your teeth grit together, but the more pressing issue at hand wins out. You only need to sit up to spy the dangerous glint in your boyfriend’s eyes. The bed dips under both of you, sheets rumpling in a flurry as you both scramble towards your phone, trying to grab it first.
“I am so sorry-” you begin, shrieking when Caleb tugs your phone from your hand. You flail, trying to crawl up onto his lap, shoving at his shoulders in an attempt to snatch your phone back, desperate to save the last shreds of your now scarce and very much dwindling dignity.
“You could’ve hung up,” Caleb retorts bluntly into your phone, his thumb pushing into your mouth when you open your mouth to protest. “Now fuck off.”
You watch as Caleb disconnects the call, your eyes narrowing, not tempted to suck on his thumb like you might’ve been in any other situation. Instead, you bite down, satisfaction coursing through you when Caleb yelps, watching as his eyes squeezing shut in pain. You cling on stubbornly, glaring up at him when he tries to pull his thumb free, a wince leaving him as pain flares up through his thumb. You don’t let go until Caleb protests, his hand pushing at your forehead gently.
“So mean, sweetheart,” he complains, wrapping his arms around you, his face nuzzling into your chest, mouthing at the sides of your breasts lazily.
You stare down at your boyfriend, the soft tufts of his brown hair now messy and sticking up into your face. You can feel your eye beginning to twitch, irritation prickling across your skin.
“What the fuck was that?” you snap, swatting the side of his head, “you said you hung up!”
“Must’ve forgotten,” Caleb mumbles, his expression feigning innocence as his eyes flick up to meet yours.
“Really?” you murmur, leaning forward, head tilting. “You forgot? Guess I’ll just forget to stay here tonight.”
You move to get off of his lap, but Caleb clicks his tongue, his arms tightening around you. You try again, but his hold is firm, preventing you from going anywhere other than staying in his lap.
“Thought you were my good girl,” Caleb sighs, dragging his lips across your jaw, trailing soft kisses over your skin. “I was only showing him who you really belonged to.”
“Belonged to?” you echo, hand cupping the back of his head to bare your neck to him when he kisses your neck.
“Mhm,” he hums, lifting his head to peck your lips. You can’t help but lean into him, eyes fluttering as he brushes his thumbs over your cheeks gently, tucking your hair behind your ears.
“Funny,” you breathe out, showing him your hand, “I don’t see a ring on my hand.”
Caleb pauses, his eyes widening for a moment before a smile spreads across his face, his head dipping to give you another kiss.
“I can do that,” he whispers against your lips. “You want a ring, sweetheart? I’ll give you one.”
“That’s not what I-” you begin exasperatedly, squeaking when Caleb grabs your chin, his mouth slotting over yours to kiss you heatedly, stopping you from speaking.
“So?” Caleb asks eagerly, “what do you want? A diamond? Personally, I think-”
“I am not marrying you,” you interrupt, pressing your hands against his chest to push him back. You bite your lip, averting your gaze, feeling a little shy. “...At least not right now, so- so shut up.”
“I’ll marry you eventually,” Caleb murmurs, a smile spreading across his face, “been wanting to ever since we were kids.”
You groan, flopping away from him, burying your face into a pillow to hide your flustered expression.
“C’mere baby,” he coaxes, smiling against your cheek after he pulls you into his arms, letting you bury your face into his warm chest. “I love you.”
“You’re such a dick,” you mumble, peering up at him. You pout and Caleb grins, dropping a soft kiss to your forehead. “I love you too, jerk.”
He runs his fingers through your hair, stroking gently as your eyes droop shut, lulled to sleep by the heat and comfort of his body, cocooned in Caleb’s affection - until he decides to ruin it with a thoughtful whisper that makes him sound entirely too pleased with what he’s managed to accomplish.
“Guess you’re gonna have to send me the syllabus for that class after all.”
#caleb smut#caleb#caleb x reader#love and deepspace caleb#lnd caleb#lnd smut#caleb xia#lads#lads caleb
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steve singing the cheesiest pop songs into a fake microphone at eddie just bc he's in a good mood and because eddie 'hates' it
steve singing these songs morphs into steve singing the same songs but swapping out lyrics to whatever eddie is doing, or they're doing, or to something that happened in a hellfire campaign etc
steve still singing those songs around everyone else but also starts to sing his changed lyric masterpieces to eddie specifically
One particular instance being when Steve starts to sing Frankie Valli at him while trying to convince him to go out with him and robin to this club they'd heard about.
He and Robin were trying to convince him from their spots behind the counter at Family Video, arguing about if he should come with them or not long enough for Steve to come around the counter and actually do his job, stacking away tapes onto the closest shelves, when Sherry comes on over the radio.
Steve starts to bob his head along while Robin tries telling him again that it's a good place, that she has it on good authority that it's a place for other Friends of Dorothy, but she doesn't get far before Frankie AND Steve start to sing.
Eddie can quite literally note believe what he's seeing.
Steve is staring him down, his eyes full of glee as he croons Eddie's name back at him, a well-worn copy of Gremlins acting as his mic.
"Eddie~! Eddie Baby! Eddie~! Eddie Baby--" Steve's long, high pitched (though somehow still in tune) crooning of his name in place of Sherry's is (luckily) funny enough to keep his face from showing exactly how he's feeling about being called baby.
"What in the hell are you doing?"
"I agree with Buckley."
Steve ignores them, signing about his moonlit party or something, putting the tape where it goes on the shelf to Eddie's right just in time to turn and snatch up Eddie's hands in his to sing "I'm gonna make-a you my-i-ine~!", right to him, tossing his head around with the last line and spinning away to keep shelving tapes.
Eddie's face blazes hot.
"Oh my god, this is actually doing it for you, isn't it?"
He looks over at Robin, ready to snap at her, deny it all, but she looks so sincere under that mirth.
He sighs.. "Yeah."
"Can you come out tonight?" Steve sing-asks, jumping into his space and startling him.
"Really??"
He's grabbed up Ghostbusters this time, "YooOOOuUU better ask your Uncle~ Tell him everything is alright"
"He won't care!"
Steve's voice pitches lower as he continues to ignore Eddie's comments, stepping away to a nearby shelf "Why don't you come out?" then higher immediately after, as he slides the tape onto it's shelf, "With your red flannel on"
"I can't wear a dress?"
"Mmm, you look so fine~!"
"Shut up, Harrington!" Eddie's cheeks are on fire
Steve continues to ignore him, stepping back into Eddie's space and snatching him up in a spin, one hand on his hip, one grabbing his opposite hand, "Move it nice and easy,"
He's front to front with the man of his dreams and said man is, shimmying his hips to the tune, "Well you make me lose my miiiind!"
Steve goes into more long belts of "EeeEEdie bay-ay-bee" as he spins away back to shelve more tapes, leaving Eddie both entranced and bewildered at the front of the store.
"He'll be so bummed if you don't come now."
Eddie sighs, leans back against the counter to wait out the rest of the song, "Yeah.. I know."
- - - - - - - - - - -
and then they go to the bar and then steddie kiss and robin kisses a super cute girl and they live happily ever after the end
this exact scenario has haunted me every time sherry comes on the radio so today you finally get it too lmao
#drops this and runs#steddie#song fic#kinda#stevie's singin' lmao#and woo-ing his man while he does it#steve harrington#eddie munson#robin buckley#noelle writes
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And they all lived happily ever after
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Tech never died. What are you talking about? He’s living on Pabu with his brothers, helping to raise Omega as it should be
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Pt.2 Apocalyptic Ponyo AU ft. Shockwave and his menaces @keferon
If there was something you learned while living in the ugly, rotten and forgotten parts of the city your whole life, it was that trust was to be given away scarcely and returned fiercely.
Damus learned this lesson fast. Abandoned beside a squalid garbage bin after his guardian couldn't afford to take care of him anymore- not that they tried in the first place anyway. Life got only more complicated from there: food and shelter were always scarce and had to be fought for, especially if you were a scrawny kid like him and had to tussle and shove middle-aged junkies daily, to be able to scavenge inside the most recent load of trash from the local shitty restaurant in hopes for some lukewarm scraps.
And then years passed and he became less and less alone. Other kids joined him and life became just a tad bit more bearable. He slowly warmed up to them, feeling for maybe the first time the warmth of what could resemble a family, even if his was little and a bit broken. They looked out for each other: yes the older kids obviously held the most authority and weight out of all of them, but it wasn't unusual to see the twins putting on their best intimidating appearances and stand tall in front of any adult after they dared pick on one of their older siblings- he had seen the scratches and bite marks covering the poor soul who tried to steal Windcharger's lunch...
It had always been left unsaid, but it was clear they loved and cared deeply for each other- that sort of care that looked rough and jagged from an outsider perspective, but it was their kind of love and nobody- adult or whatever could ever have a say in this.
But it was when you cared so intensely that even at the mere prospect of losing something so dear, your body and soul started betraying you.
He felt it when the apocalypse hit and now... as he watched Blue- young, naive and kind Blue, caged behind a massive wall of sharp teeth and even sharper claws, smiling happily, without a care in the world.
The beast followed the gaze of its small prisoner and finally locked eyes with the new arrivals. Sharp cat-like blue eyes curiously took in the presence of the remaining kids, with its mouth slightly open in surprise, the monster tilted its head and from its throat came forward a small melody of clicks and trills.
Damus felt his heart sink. God, what did he do in a previous life to deserve this? When he caught himself moving forward on shaky legs, it was already too late. His brain was in overdrive. He had to get the kid out of this situation now.
"...Blue, buddy, I want you to listen to me very carefully." His throat felt dry and the hands that were clutching his weapon were clammy with sweat.
"Uh? O-okay." The younger kid briefly looked at his captor before returning his focus on his brother.
"...walk slowly towards me and hide behind us."
"What?! Dee I'm not in danger yeah I know Sir. Pancake can be a bit intimidating at first even I was scared but he patched up my knee with some sea moss I don't know how he knew how to do that but-"
"Buddy please- just- sigh come here Blue!" He hated interrupting his littlest brother during one of his spiels, but now was not the right time. Stress and frustration began eating up at him from inside: why couldn't he see how dangerous this thing really was?!
"No."
Wait.
"WHAT?"
"I said. No."
Bluestreak huffed, crossing his arms in a pure show of defiance. "I'm perfectly safe where I am, you're being a jerk." To everyone's absolute horror the child lifted his right hand and patted one of the beast clawed fingers to prove his point- in return he got a quiet happy trill.
"If he really wanted to hurt me he would've done so already and I'm not letting you shoot him."
He hated to admit he kinda had a point. When the twins left the scene they left the two alone, leaving the youngest completely unprotected against a beast several times bigger than himself. If that thing really wanted to see them all dead, he wouldn't even be here to ponder the possibility.
Oh for fuck sake, he knew where this was going. They were NOT going to adopt a random fish person.
Were they?
\\\
Well wasn't this quite the situation he found himself in?
Honestly, he had been only searching for a place to finally experience some peace and quiet, away from the grubby hands of the Senate and, consequently, his very dear colleagues. If he had to speak with esteemed senator Tyrest again and entertain him as he blabbed away about 'Rectitude' and 'Order', while an impressive persistent piece of algae clinged on his front teeth- he was going to lose it and offer himself as lunch to the first frenzied monster he found.
As he reached the surface he began to notice the utter and total destruction around him. Apparently a massive cataclysm had hit a few days prior, leaving the city in utter squalor- he wondered how many lost their lives in the wreckage. Wondering the landscape now engulfed by water. He passed what were once streets, houses and parks- ordinary places where people like his spent their time just... living.
He wasn't unfamiliar with humans, of course: little hardy creatures, with a knack for destroying everything they came across, even themselves. But he would be lying if he didn't admit he came to favor them- oh, yes! Their utter lack of self preservation had wholly endeared them to him. How depressing things turned out to be.
He let his train of thoughts race aimlessly as he finally let himself breach the water and slowly heave himself on a random slab of abandoned concrete, perfectly warmed up by the midday sun and he prepared himself to doze off to the calming lull of the waves around him...
A voice- oh no, a couple whispering voices reached his audial fins. They sounded young, very young, but he could not discern the meaning of their words. Too entranced by the new language he didn't notice that one of the speakers was getting quite close to his face, until he felt a sharp poke on his cheek that abruptly made him open his eyes and stand on alert.
What came after happened too quickly for his still foggy brain to follow entirely: three small humans, most likely guppies, scrambled away from him. The two he presumed were the oldest sprinted as far as possible, while the runt of the bunch got his tiny final caught on a stray rock and fell miserably on the hard ground.
The other screeched once more as they hurried away to who-knows-where, leaving him and their tiny companion alone. Surely not the best wake-up call he ever had but it can only go better from here, can it?
A tiny whimper woke him up from his stupor as he once again focused on the small pile of human still plastered on the floor before him. Poor dear must have hurt himself, well that won't do. Slowly, gently he caressed the back of the little darling as he kept softly hiccuping- it was a shame humans skin wasn't as tough as his, it would prevent such inconveniences to happen, not that he blamed the little thing for his own poor biology, of course.
"Oh sweetheart, it's going to be okay I promise. You're a very tough small fry, I've got you." He let himself coo softly like he heard parents do to their own off-spring. Still minding his own size and sharp points, he dared to nudge the guppy over and inspect the damage himself- turns out the little one had only grazed his right limb, nothing a small dab of sea moss cannot fix.
As he tended to the guppy's injury, he witnessed the little thing's mood change completely: from an inconsolable heap on the floor to a lively chatterbox- even if the meaning still escaped from him, the constant stream of sound made for a pleasant background as he continued his ministrations. And anyway, the guppy was happy just talking his audials away, who was he to stop his fun?
Once he deemed his work acceptable enough, he gently prodded the little one to stand beside him, close enough to cover him with one of his fins as a make-shift blanket, and keep him cozy and warm against the evening ocean breeze. Sleep crept closer to him once more, as he listened to his new small ward rant about this and that, while the last rays of the sun warmed his back. Content and at ease he felt his body betray him as he recognized a familiar pleased rumble start in his throat.
He let himself relax further, knowing this far out nothing would dare attack him and his little guppy. However, he was pleasantly surprised when from the rubble emerged three more small humans.
Well, he counted six unattended little ones so far- this was getting quite awkward really, who was leaving all these children lying around? They were clearly sporting some sort of weapons, he guessed- although he felt that was reasonably natural, considering humans didn't have any claws or sharp fangs to defend themselves with.
He watched as the two parties shared a fairly animated conversation. These were most likely his guppy's little friends or... siblings? No matter really since they were all way too young to be wandering around alone in a place like this.
It was final then! He ought to protect and care for these little ones, until they wouldn't need him anymore.
#transformers#apocalyptic ponyo#im back with more fish-dad#you have no idea how much fun im having writing this#im losing my sense of humanity#shockwave is a rich fish#his kids can smell his richness he aint fooling no one#hope you enjoyed!!#the humble pancake shark
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18 (Oscar Piastri x Reader)
Series Masterlist
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The garden was beautiful, it was the one they spent most of their time loitering in. Nothing extravagant but very meaningful to the pair who were getting ready to walk down the aisle. The guests were arriving and taking their assigned seats. There was a soft chatter among the crowd. Everyone was smiling and laughing and tearing up. When the time came, everyone took their turn walking down the aisle.
Oscar felt his palm sweat more than they ever did in a F1 car. He had a pip in his step as he walked down the aisle, smiling at the crowd and waiting for his Y/N to walk down the aisle. Everyone until Y/N's turn was a blur to Oscar. When the time came, her father led her down the aisle with tear filled eyes. Y/N had imagined her father crying as he gave her away but she didn't expect a teary eyes, on the verge of tears Oscar. He was wiping his eyes trying to take her in. Her father gave her hand in his and he almost pulled her towards him. "Didn't think you'd cry" she chided. "You look" he gasped trying not to cry anymore.
The officiant spoke some words of wisdom to the pair and waited for them to read out their vows. Y/N pulled out an envelope and started with hers, "Dear Oscar Jack Piastri. I didn't expect to see you cry but you don't fail to surprise me even after so many years" she said making the crowd laugh. "Baby, I am so happy I get to spend the rest of myself with you. If you'd told me when I was in high school that I'd be stuck with you, I'd have laughed it off. But here I am, with you in front of me; grateful to have you with me every step of the way. I promise to love you in every way and I promise to be there for you through all the cliche and important and life altering stuff. You're like the sun in my dark days. You're like the rainbow after the rain shower. You are the first snow in winter. You are everything special yet ordinary in my life. Something I couldn't live without. I hope you, me and Piastri junior can live happily ever after." she paused because of Oscar's shocked face. "I really do love you so much and I have a surprise for you." Y/N finished, pulling another envelope from her envelope, handing it to Oscar. He took it and pulled a couple pictures of ultrasound. Oscar looked at her waiting for a response and she only nodded.
"So, apparently my dear wife here" Oscar said but was cut off by someone in the crowd with a loud,"not yet" Oscar laughed. "Getting there. You, Y/N Piastri really like to keep me on my toes. Can't believe we'll have a tiny us for the rest of our life. Just so everyone knows, Y/N's pregnant." Oscar announced. The crowd burst out into cheers. "Ahm" Oscar cleared his throat to get everyone's attention. "If you'll let me get back to my vows. I thought my vows were half decent but I can't top those" Oscar sighed. "I met you here in high school when I was away from home and missed home. You made me feel at home, you made everything better. I hadn't realised it than but I was in love with you from the moment we met. I didn't know what I would do with my life but I knew it would have you in it. I wasn't even 18 but I knew it was you and it had to be you. I am so happy I get to make you mine in the very place we spent most of our time, all the times away from school or our stupid dates or the times you'd chase me around these tress. They've seen us grow and I hope they stand witness to us and our eternal love. Thank you for having me and I hope you'll continue to have me. I love you and mini us and can't wait to meet them" he finished. Y/N was in tears. "You're ruining my make up" she mumbled. Oscar just smiled and softly dabbed the tears away.
After the I dos, the officiant continued, "I, now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride" he said and the pair spared no moment to connect their lips.
#f1 imagine#f1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 x y/n#formula 1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula one x reader#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#formula one fic#formula one fanfiction#formula one imagine#formula 1 fic#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x you#oscar piastri x y/n#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri x reader#op81#oscar piastri#op81 x y/n#op81 imagine#op81 x reader#op81 fic#op81 x you
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May I ask your advice on something? I want to make a cookie that will be loved by shadow milk and I toss and turn the idea in my head thinking about his loneliness, but his arrogance in assuming most cookies aren’t worthy of his time makes it difficult. It leads me to building the cookie to be bigger and more powerful/elaborate than him so he immediately recognizes it, but that’s unsatisfying for me. I’d like them to be ordinary, clever of course, observant, and quick witted to not only keep up with shadow milk, but to even outpace him at times in a verbal sparring match. But most ordinary cookies don’t really fit the bill. They usually either worship or fear him depending on personality and self awareness. Both are good and what he needs/uses, but you can’t really be friends with a tool. Makes it hard to think of an ordinary cookie that might have caught his attention. I liked your analysis of what getting close to him pre corruption was and he’s a more viable candidate, but even he on some level looks down upon ordinary cookies that know less and don’t live as long. Namuwiki and regular wiki categorize his corruption as both an obsession with his own power as well as loneliness in a truth that broke him. I think the truth that did so or that at least planted the seed of corruption was: that cookies/people don’t care about the truth. He states as much so many times to pure vanilla to weaken his resolve, his dedication to truth. How cookies willingly/happily turn from the bitter truth to embrace a sweet lie. How cookies were more interested in listening to him speak than what he was really saying. It’s a one two punch realizing the cookies around you don’t really care about the thing that makes you you. And if they do it may only be for selfish gain, not for knowledge in itself. And the real rub is the reason they don’t care is often times due to some form of ignorance or stupidity. I mentioned this to a friend irl and she said,”oh he got bullied before he got corrupted. 💯” Which made me think of the cookies before his fall, who maybe took for granted that 1. The font of knowledge even exists and 2.That he would willingly and happily answer their questions truthfully forever and 3. Would never lose his patience. Because how much do you want to bet that the illusion from the sugar free road he taunted pure vanilla with, the woman yelling at him saying “tell us where to seek healing! Tell us how to be healthy to live in wealth and happiness! Use your power! Share your power with us! Do it if you truly care!” Were words from a cookie in shadow milks past? How many refused to seek the truth themselves, wishing no demanding he provide it for them. And criticizing him if/when he either refuses or lies, like bratty children. “Nothing but empty promises. All a lie.” Give them! Cookies who were so ignorant and stupid wanting to take away the thing that makes him him. Because that’s all he is isn’t he? His power his soul jam. Neither he nor anyone else it seems has seen him beyond his abilities. To who he is as a cookie.
Which is just another layer to his isolation, but all of which to say. Maybe the ordinary cookie who just happens to be curious, innovative, and above all patient and kind is his only balm against such words. And maybe that cookie crumbles under the weight of their deceit. Maybe that helps crumble his resolve. After all the main thing hes running from, the big lie he tells himself is that nothing bad ever happens to him. Because how could it? He’s a god, he’s all knowing, but not all powerful. Thoughts?
I think Shadow Milk's fall is the most interesting, because it could quite honestly be either he fell first or last. I'm a bigger fan of the him falling last theory, because it's very interesting to see how he would react to his friends becoming beasts and realizing he too will shortly.
With the new costume's story we can get a better look into him, and he's a lot like PV. Patient, kind, gentle, intelligent, and more than willing to share his knowledge with cookies. With such knowledge, he is very separate from other cookies. He knows and understands things that other cookies could never dream of.
That much knowledge will weigh on your being, even if you are a god. Especially if it's all you're supposed to be, a fount of knowledge for cookies. I think he does enjoy sharing his knowledge and the truths of the world. He cares for his cookies. How could he not? they are innocent and freshly baked, full of fear and confusion. His knowledge is meant to soothe them.
But, cookies fear what they do not understand. When they start asking harder questions, and he gives them the truthful answer, they don't like it. They lash out and deny the truth, and he realizes they would rather live in a lie than bear the truth. The fact that, even if it's unintentional, the very cookies he loves and cherishes are rejecting him... well, it would devastate anyone.
Shadow Milk Cookie became a beast because he was rejected by his people. He became the embodiment of lies to become what they wanted, rejecting the truth to show them the error of their ways. This is what they wanted, right?
I think that's why he needs a partner who challenges him. They can't just accept everything he does as okay. He doesn't want or need someone who just sits there and affirms him like his minions. His partner needs a backbone and a strong moral compass, the confidence to look at him and say, "Absolutely not."
They also need to have the awareness that he is the master of lies. They need to be able to see through his lies and illusions by themselves because he can't hold their hand all the time. He has this deep aching need to be seen, though he doesn't acknowledge those feelings. They have to be able to crack his shell by themselves and show that they care, and only then will he open up to them.
It's certainly not an easy feat for a normal cookie, but if Ginger Brave and co. can do it, I'm sure his partner can also do it. It takes a special cookie to get the master of deceit tripping over himself, after all.
#bunni's treats 🧁#shadow milk#shadow milk crk#shadow milk x reader#shadow milk cookie#shadow milk x you
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The terror where everything is the same but they are all puppy!boys with tails and ears and they all get down freak nasty style
#solomon tozer sleeping in a (litteral) dog pile with the marines#edward little on his knees begging and whining with his ears flat#john irving getting embarrassed when his tail wags at some very unchristain thoughts#jopson struggling to keep his tail bone straight during the flogging scene#i wanna see more suggestions from you freaks in the tags#also they all live and get rescued and live happily ever after because i said so#the terror#the terror amc#amc the terror#edward little#john irving#thomas jopson#solomon tozer#puppy!boy au
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part two!! 🩷
@cambrezee <- i remembered u, luv. 😽
Simon came back a few days later, to get a haircut of his own. His buzzcut had grown out since he had retired about half a year ago, and he just needed it shaved again. You happily agreed, even offering to do it for free. Of course, Simon would never let that slide.
He sat down, dwarfing the chair. You toss an adult apron over his front and begin gently turning his head to the sides to check out what you’re working with.
“You been cuttin’ hair for a while?” He asks you as you get ready to shave his head, searching your drawers for some clippers. You nod and explain your experience with beauty school, and why you decided to open your own shop in the end. He nods, and says he’s proud. “Doesn’t look easy to have built this place from nothin’,” he says.
You finally find your clippers and discuss how short he wants the buzz before looking for the right guard size. He notes the fact that you have no ring on your finger. “Little bonnie thing l’you is single? Unbelievable.” He chuffs. He grins at the slight flush on your face, not hiding the way his eyes lazily roam your body. You explain that your last ‘boyfriend’ was a total douche, so you decided to just stop searching for love for a while. He makes a flirty comment about love finding you, and you feel yourself nearly melting.
His haircut is relatively easy, and he’s the stillest client you’ve ever had — making it easy. And unfortunately quick.
After you finish the cut, he swipes through photos of his daughter on his phone while you clean up. She’s adorable. He explains that she’s at her first day of school right now, and his eyes are a little glossy. Yours are, too, and you’re confused because this isn’t even your daughter and somehow you miss her all the same.
“Anyways,” he says when you two are standing at the counter, “so, are you still coming home with me or…?” You laugh and roll your eyes, refusing to take his money again. How could you, birdie?
“How about you take my number home with you, and I call you tonight?” He settles for that, sneakily setting £200 on your counter as he leaves. Cheeky prick.
You get two texts as you sit down with your dinner in the living room.
“Hi, luv. - Simon.”
“Fuckin’ sight you are. Call me when you can. x”
Agh, thank God for that little girl needing a haircut.
#any tag involving cod to be honest#cod au#call of duty fic#blueberrybabbles#simon riley x reader#ghost x you#simon riley drabble#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley#simon riley x you#simon ghost x reader#fem reader
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My last alternate prompt for Fluffebruary is: Anniversary! This is set around July 2028, so about a little over a year after the Baby Fever prompt. It's time to give these boys a baby, and we're going to pretend this all lines up with California's regulations. You can read this on AO3 over here. Tagging @bucktommyfluffebruary
There were disagreements about what counted as an anniversary for them. Was it their first kiss? Their first date? Maddie and Chim’s wedding? The day they got back together?
Buck liked to joke that the reason they got married so fast was to settle the argument once and for all and give them a single definite date to celebrate.
“That's why?” Bobby asks without looking up from the baseboard he's painting around.
“Yep. Only reason,” Tommy says, pouring more paint into the pan next to Buck's elbow. He drops a kiss on his hair before he disappears out of the room to hunt down the new pack of paintbrushes he swore he'd bought.
“Also taxes,” Buck adds, standing so he can stretch out his back and legs. He's been folded up on the floor while he paints under the window, but there's not a drop of paint anywhere but the wall. “Why'd you marry Athena?”
“Because I couldn't live without her.”
Buck smiles. “Yeah, that, too.”
He surveys the room, formerly the office. It's going to be a nursery for their baby, because the second Bobby had come upstairs with a safe surrender baby in his arms, he'd known. He'd held him and looked into his tiny little face, and he'd known in his heart that he was holding their son for the first time.
He'd called Tommy and asked him to come to the station on his break, and they'd sat on one of the banks and held him and soothed him and fed him and burped him and changed him and talked quietly and cried and fretted over logistics and realized the state’s regulations around safe surrender babies was against them in this case.
“We're not certified to foster.”
And like an angel, Hen poked her head in and pointed out that she was and had already spent forty minutes on the phone with her wife. She also sat down and explained how adopting from foster care worked. By the end of her explanation, the three of them were in tears and sitting on a bunk together and watching every little thing Robbie did. Once he was medically cleared, she and Karen took over legal custody as emergency fosters until the adoption could go through, and they're only a few weeks away from everything being finalized. In the meantime, Buck and Tommy have put in parental leave requests, started the process of filing for FMLA to cover them beyond what LAFD pays for, and they’ve been able to spend as much time with Robbie as possible. Except for today, because today involves a lot of paint and nailing things and putting together furniture and only FaceTiming Hen twice to see him.
“Got ‘em!” Tommy calls from down the hall. When he enters the room, he's got a fistful of paintbrushes so they can deal with the trim and baseboards.
“After this, I'll head home,” Bobby says, dipping the brush in one of the smaller cans of paint. “Give you two some time alone.”
Buck smiles and takes the can when Bobby offers it. “Thanks for helping.”
“Well, it's my first grandkid,” Bobby points out, squeezing the back of Buck’s neck and giving him a shiny-eyed smile.
“Yeah,” Buck agrees happily, reaching up to hook his hand over Bobby's elbow and giving it a squeeze before they return to their respective tasks.
It had taken them sitting Bobby down to talk about the baby's name for Bobby to really understand.
“Italian families normally name the firstborn son after the paternal grandfather. I don't want him to be named after my father, who wasn't even Italian, and Evan—well.”
“Robert. Robert Gianni. Gianni was his Nonno’s name, he's kind of the closest thing Tommy ever had to a real dad. And you're the closest I'll ever get. I-is that okay?”
Bobby had pushed away from the table, come around, and yanked Buck into a hug. All he'd been able to do was nod. After that, he'd stopped rolling his eyes whenever anyone would call him “Grampa Bobby.” Instead, he's taken to teasing Athena with progressively sillier sounding options for her until she had threatened to cuff him to her bumper after they were all done with lunch. She'd told Buck and Tommy to just have her go by “Gramma” and hit them with a stunner of a smile when she said it.
“I like this color,” Bobby comments as he swipes paint across the door trim. The room is a pale green, and Buck had agonized over it for days until Tommy had swooped in and pointed to the one Buck liked more anyway.
“It's supposed to be calming,” Buck says, and Bobby snorts. “Yeah, that's what Tommy said.”
“Whatever helps,” Bobby says dryly.
When the room is done being painted, Bobby heads out with the promise to come back to help hang shelves and artwork the next day.
“Get some sleep, boys!” Bobby calls over his shoulder as he descends their porch steps. “You'll need it.”
Tommy barks out a laugh. “Like I haven't been getting woken up out of a dead sleep by alarms for almost twenty years.”
“Yeah, we've been practicing for this,” Buck agrees.
“Whatever you say,” Bobby says, opening the front gate.
They go back inside, and Buck stands in the middle of the nursery to survey the space, satisfied that they won't need another coat of paint. As he contemplates what color rug they should get, he hears a board creak behind him. Two strong arms snake around his waist and a chin rests on his shoulder, and Buck relaxes into the familiar embrace.
“Want to order something?” Tommy asks. “I don't know if I'm up for cooking.”
“Might not be a bad idea,” Buck replies, leaning back against him. “You know, this isn't how I pictured our second wedding anniversary going.”
“Mm, me either. But this is perfect.” Tommy kisses the side of his neck. “What's the traditional second year gift?”
Buck tilts his head and lets his eyes flutter shut as Tommy's lips keep pressing against his skin. “Cotton,” he sighs.
Tommy chuckles and nuzzles his neck, sending pleasant tingles along Buck’s spine. “Hey, we got plenty of that. Crib sheets, onesies, burp cloths, bibs—I think we nailed it.”
Buck turns in his arms and wraps his own around Tommy's neck, smiling at his husband’s beautiful face. “You're totally right.”
“Am I?” Tommy teases, ducking in to kiss his neck and eliciting a laugh out of Buck when his stubble tickles him. “Then I guess I can return your gift—”
“No!” Buck howls, laughing harder when Tommy’s arms squeeze him tighter as he tries to half-heartedly struggle away.
“Okay, okay.” Tommy concedes, rocking them gently side-to-side. “You'll get your gift.”
Buck slips a hand under the waistband of his sweats to grope his ass. “Is it in cotton?”
Tommy growls against his shoulder and lifts Buck, which he never gets sick of. He lets out an undignified squeak as he wraps his legs around his husband.
“Okay, I got you two gifts,” Tommy admits, kissing him as he walks them out of the room. “Which one do you want first?”
“The one I get to unwrap right now,” Buck murmurs, grinding against his belly. “Especially since this will be a lot harder to do in just a couple weeks.”
Tommy grins and nuzzles his nose against the underside of Buck’s jaw. “Yeah? Big plans?”
“Thought I might give fatherhood a try,” Buck says as Tommy draws his face back to maneuver them through the hall. “You in?”
“With you? Absolutely,” Tommy replies, his grin softening around the edges. “Completely and forever.”
Buck can't hold back his giddy grin, and he hugs Tommy tightly as he's carried across the threshold to their room.
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21st Century Romance-
And Derek did exactly that. But only that one time. No matter what time it was, no matter how inane it was, Derek always answered.
_
Stiles' phone rang then, and he sighed deeply. he geared up mentally for some sort of patented Derek Hale lecture about perseverance, but instead Derek just started talking. for hours. for more words than Stiles had ever heard come out of his mouth, ever. He talked about his pack, and wolf history, and culture. Stiles isn't sure when he fell asleep, but he did know that Derek didn't fall asleep or even hang up until after the younger man had woken up the next morning.
Stiles didn't text Derek for quite a while after that. He didn't know what he was feeling and all his research pointed to a mate bond forming. the pulling at an invisible string and he feelings that we was feeling. feelings that definitely weren't his own.
Stiles set his phone down at that point, trying to focus on a random episode of Golden Girls that was on the living room TV. He must have fallen asleep on the couch, because he only woke up when he heard a knock on the door. When he opened it there was no one there, only a large tupperware, a white Gatorade and a box of orange pekoe tea. There was a post it note on top of the container that simply said 'feel better, D. x'. Stiles pointedly did not think about how Derek knew his favourite Gatorade colour.
it took him a few minutes to snap out of his surprised stupor and take everything into the kitchen, but when he did he sat down and opened the container, only to be assualted by the most wonderful aroma of homemade chicken soup chocked full of veg and garlic.
Stiles got more and more confused with every text interaction with Derek but he happily ate his soup. And if he swore he could feel someone else's affection when he ate it? Well, that was his business.
#sterek#derek hale#stiles stilinski#teen wolf#fanfic#but mostly just text messages#i needed to purge this from my brain#drabble
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this is a GREAT analysis that really sums up how complex the whole situation is - like you totally nailed it with the observation that Garak is simultaneously trying not to crush Ziyal's delicate heart while also being selfish in both wanting to spend time with another Cardassian who doesn't actively hate his guts / want him dead / is trying to kill him AND wanting to mess with Dukat, which is all on brand for him.
but also the only way you survive growing up doing forced labour in a Breen mine is - I assume - through fantasy (like believing your father is going to come and rescue you so you can go and live happily ever after on Cardassia together despite every Cardassian in the mine telling you he's going to kill you for being illegitimate), so it's also on brand for Ziyal that after living on Cardassia presumably being shunned by every other person there except Dukat that she would seize the opportunity to have a "relationship" with a Cardassian who is actually polite and kind towards her!
like of COURSE part of her wants to believe it's love!! she has literally never known any sort of kindness from a fellow Cardassian except her own father (and he DID want to fucking kill her when they finally reunited and is also bloody Gul Dukat so his "kindness" is nothing of the sort) like if that had been my upbringing the raging homosexual who was being nice to me would probably seem like a fantastic love interest!!
don't get me wrong, I don't love the whole "let's give Garak a young female love interest so we can pretend he's not queer" aspect of it either ... but also, the dynamic between Garak and Ziyal actually makes a lot of sense when you really look at their characters - it's just the way some of the writing treats it like its actually love and not just like ... a symptom of Ziyal's fucked up upbringing / her being delulu about Garak as much as she is about Dukat and Kira ever getting along, that makes it questionable imo
smth abt ziyal is when I'm rewatching those cringy moments with her and garak, they canonically aren't flirting the cardassian way. They are so cordial and polite to each other that it's so plain that at the very least garak has no romantic intentions towards her. He treats her like how he treats o'brien. He has more chemistry with odo
I used to be of the opinion on my first watch that the ziyal garak thing never should have happened (and it definitely could have been handled differently - sometimes it felt like different writers had different intentions with their dynamic and it got weird)
And to preface there was DEFINITELY homophobia involved in the doylist explanation for why garak got ( to what the average viewer saw as) a young female love interest
But one thing people don't tend to realise is that its stated QUITE plainly that garak doesn't return her feelings. He definitely didn't push her away hard enough, but he's a bit of a scumbag who prioritised having any sort of positive relationship with a cardassian over telling her to fuck off. (I also imagine he wanted to spare her feelings)
I think Garak could realise (bad dad squad) that Ziyals views on men (especially older cardassian men) was a very fragile topic to be handled and she was pretty much constantly rejected by her kind - which definitely lended itself to letting her kiss him, but he did outright tell her he didn't like her that way, so I'm not mad.
Ziyal is jumbled all the way up. Thank you Dukat. And Garak clearly thinks it's really funny to not fully dispel the rumour so he can deal immense psychic damage to her father.
They really aren't flirting the cardassian way - like ever - but I don't think that's to say Ziyal doesn't understand cardassian flirting. She is absolutely like her father in the sense that she manipulates kira into hanging out with her dad just because she wants them to get along - despite knowing Kiras genuine aggression doesn't match up with Dukats flirtatious kind. Ziyal is a good person but she is also related to Dukat and by God will she manipulate
One thing I will patently disagree with is the comparison to how garak treats O'brien (in regards to the general sexlessness).
That is wrong. Have you seen empok nor. Garak absolutely has a weird one sided homoerotic jealously thing with O'brien. It's O'brien who wants him shot out an airlock. That's on garak.
#like it'd hit a lot harder if Kira was able to talk more about *gestures to all of the above* rather than being like 'she really loved you'#anyway you should def write more meta when hopped up on pain killers this was a good take
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18+ MDNI reader is GN but there are some feminine terms.
Part one Gardener!SimonRiley x Oldmoney!Reader
PrivateChef!Price x Oldmoney!Reader
(TW: creampie, breedingkink, jealousy, masturbation, overstimulation, all of these are vague if you read deep into it)
AN: I was not expecting the amount of love my first post got so thank you so much(≧∇≦)
also currently suffering from a UTI, and when I told my partner he was like you have an std 😭 I told him to kys immediately after men are dumb guys (and I chose this voluntarily…)
Anyway wish me luck with my UTI
Oldmoney!Reader like to happily spend their time at home being a couch potato, they already have enough money to put them and the next three generations through life some would they waste their time working when they can take up any hobby they can imagine
Oldmoney!Reader always finding the most unique recipes on TikTok or Instagram and spamming PrivateChef!Prices inbox on all the apps and even iMessage
PrivateChef!Price who doesn’t live on the manors land like the rest of the staff but actually commutes daily to come to readers home, prep food, cook for them, them return to his own home
PrivateChef!Price who does as best as he can to recreate the recipes reader sends him, making sure to do at least one a week, writing down the ones reader likes more and keeping them in a little note pad he tucks away in his apron.
PrivateChef!Price going far beyond readers expectations with every new recipe he tries and convinces the picky eaters that reader is to eat.
Oldmoney!Reader always looking at the new dishes like they are poisonous and vile, wonder just what they where about to eat rather than having price make them their comfort foods
Oldmoney!Reader who likes to invade prices kitchen and sometimes even kick him out so they can make snacks for Gardener!SimonRiley
PrivateChef!Price who is insanely jealous of the brew chemistry between Oldmoney!Reader and Gardener!SimonRiley
PrivateChef!Price trying to find a way to bend reader over the kitchen counter and take them right then and there but has to snap out of his thoughts to not burn the dish he was working on
PrivateChef!Price a food connoisseur but he can’t help but wonder just good reader would taste laying half naked on the kitchen island, back arched as he ate your cunt like it was the most perfect meal he’s ever eaten
PrivateChef!Price watching reader stumble back into the kitchen after seeing both reader and Gardener!SimonRiley disappear into the garden shed for a while, and reader comes into the kitchen clearly having just been fucked
PrivateChef!Price who has words to say to Gardener!SimonRiley, nothing nice of course because Simon got to his bird first when he had been planning and planning just how he would take the most private of reader as his own
PrivateChef!Price having to leave early the day you and Gardener!SimonRiley get freaky disappeared into the garden shed so he calm his own nerves and not kill the other man, but got the hard on he got strains so tightly in his pants as he saw you walk back into the kitchen also made him have to excuse himself
PrivateChef!Price masturbating to the thought of how fucked out you would look from you taking every part of him, picturing how many orgasms he could probably draw from you within a night, while he ate out your cunt, delved his fingers Into you to stretch out your tight pretty cunt, flicking at your clit while pressing on that soft gummy spot deep inside you before he’s spitting on his cock and slipping it between your folds to lube it up before making you take him inch by inch.
PrivateChef!Price cumming so quickly into his own palm but wishing it was deep inside your cunt so he could see you so full of him cum as he fucks it right back into you until that white ring is forming around the base of his cock, and your crying from overstimulation and too many orgasms to count on one hand
#141 x reader#poly!141 x reader#cod omegaverse#ghoap x reader#141 x you#poly 141#simon riley x reader#john price x reader#john price#captain price#price cod#price#price x reader#cod#cod x reader#cod mwii#cod modern warfare#ghost cod#cod mw2#cod x you#soap cod#cod mw3#simon riley#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley#simon riley smut#john price smut#cod smut
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reading update: february 2025
I can't believe that with all the bullshit nonsense of this year I've managed to read ten book a month for two months in a row. it's not on purpose but it's crazy that it's happened twice!
what have I been reading?
The Art of Frugal Hedonism: A Guide to Spending Less While Enjoying Everything More (Annie Raser-Rowland w/ Adam Grubb, 2017; audiobook read by Alice Ansara, 2024) - this was my first audiobook, and it was a doozy. the short version is that this book sucked and made me so, so mad. I really hoped to have my scathing haterade-fueled review up on patreon by now so that I could link it, but that hasn't panned out because I just have too much to say about these out of touch cunts offering the world's least qualified financial advice. "just take a leisurely twelve hour hike to a train station instead of going on vacation" kill yourself!!!
The Age of Magical Overthinking: Notes on Modern Irrationality (Amanda Montell, 2024) - I quite liked Montell's previous book, Cultish, but unfortunately I fear Magical Overthinking was a bit of a flop for me. I can't help but feel that the ideal target demographic is extremely anxious women in their teens and early 20s who need a compassionate explanation of why they should spend less time on Twitter and TikTok, and I'm afraid that shrimply isn't me.
The Serviceberry: Abundance and Reciprocity in the Natural World (Robin Wall Kimmerer, 2024; audiobook read by the author) - this was, unintentionally, a lovely little counterpoint to Frugal Hedonism. where Raser-Rowland and Grubb focus deeply on individual consumption habits and have a bad penchant of commodifying human interaction, Potawatomi botanist Kimmerer emphasizes the need for structural environmental change that can come by embracing Indigenous models of viewing the earth and its resources as members of crucial members of the family deserving of respect. a thoughtful and lovely balm to the bullshit!
My Year of Rest and Relaxation (Ottessa Moshfegh, 2018) - a book about the original queen of giving us nothing, as our protagonist goes to increasingly drastic lengths to spend as much time as possible asleep and disengaged from anything more complicated than acquiring more prescription pills. what can I say? I love books about miserable rich white women rotting in their own self-absorption.
Don't Want You Like a Best Friend (Emma R. Alban, 2024) - this was my patreonites' pick for my romance novel of the month, and I'll admit I went in nervous - historical romance novels are often not my thing, and the Taylor Swift lyric for the title was a red flag. but you know what? this was a romp. I was entertained. dare I say I was even charmed. sure, it falls into the common historical queer romance pitfall of emphasizing the vague threat of period-typical homophobia while assuring us that every important character just so happens to be startlingly cool with homosexuality, but whatever - I didn't come here to see these girls get hatecrimed by their own parents, alright? I wasn't planning to read the sequel, but it turns out it's a VERY direct follow up where the girls from this book hatch an INSANE plan to (SPOILER ALERT) get their male cousins to fall in gay love so that they can lavender marry each other's cousins and live happily ever after. INSANE! I love it here.
Dawn (Octavia E. Butler, 1987) - on the one hand, I'm a little heartbroken. this marks the beginning of the last of Butler's series that I haven't read; after Adulthood Rites and Imago, I'll have read everything she published in her too-short life, with no new works to look forward to ever again. but on the other hand: MAN, am I glad I saved this one for last. this book has it all: humanity's near-extinction. aliens. psychic tentacle threesomes. maybe the biggest L that any of Butler's heroines ever took. it's wild out here! cannot wait to see where we're going with this.
Iron Widow (Xiran Jay Zhao, 2021) - this was a reread to prep for the sequel, Heavenly Tyrant, which came out in December, and MAN am I glad I decided to check back in with the first book. I really thought I remembered the broad strokes of the plot well enough, but I really did not remember just how blood-spittingly bugfuck viscous Zetian and her two boyfriends are. of the three people in this throuple, the nicest one is the guy who murdered his brothers and dad in cold blood. and I think that's awesome! cannot wait to see what these absolute freaks are up to now, and my hold cannot come into the library quickly enough.
Pardon My Frenchie (Farrah Rochon, 2024) - okay. listen. on paper I shouldn't like this book. the male love interest is boring at best and a full-blown shithead at worst. the biggest driver of the plot is the love interests' dogs going crazy levels of viral. the sex is minimal and nothing to write home about. and yet. AND YET. our female lead, Ashanti, is simply so charming and earnest and plucky that I adored her immediately. girl lost both her parents on the same day, had to drop out of veterinary school to raise her twin younger sisters, and is struggling to run the world's most plush doggy day care AND run a successful side business selling homemade dog biscuits. truly I just want anything to go right for her, ever. she's never even been eaten out prior to this book, and that makes me so, SO sad for her. I may not like her boyfriend, but at least he'll get her off, and that counts for something. overall, it's Ashanti's storyline about learning how to prioritize what's important to her and let some obligations go instead of clinging madly to everything that really got me through and won me over. plus, this book bypassed by usual kneejerk dislike of obnoxiously cutesy plot device pets in romance novels by making the dogs actually completely integral to the story and the characters - Ashanti is hugely defined by her adoration of every dog she meets - in a way that I really enjoy. will I read the upcoming sequel, Pugs and Kisses? fuck it. maybe.
White Feminism: From the Suffragettes to Influencers and Who They Leave Behind (Koa Beck, 2019) - Beck's book falls in a really sweet spot of building very well on a lot of feminism 101 to actually meaningfully discuss new concepts without being redundant. okay, yes, you've heard "white feminism" is bad, but do you know why? Beck has some of the most well laid-out explanations I've ever encountered, thoroughly detailing the ways in which white feminism reject collectivist anti-capitalist action in favor of individual advancement within the status quo. plus there is, as promised, a great historical throughline, contrasting the actions of historical middle and upper class white feminists against those of actions largely headed up by women who are Black, brown, Jewish, and/or immigrants who served entire communities. the takedown of "lean in" office girlboss culture is particularly killer.
Acts of Service (Lillian Fishman, 2022) - a short novel, ideal for reading in a couple hours if you love mess and happen to be trapped in various airports and flights with not much else to do! I was expecting another entry in the obnoxiously disaffected young woman genre and was pleasantly surprised by how curious and engaged our protagonist, Eve, actually is! much like Edie of Luster, I think she's gonna be alright once this deranged throuple situation blows over. ultimately I don't know if the conclusion of the novel hit for me as well as Luster did, and when I got to the end of the book I did kind of find myself going damn... and what was the point of all that? I have no idea, but it was well-crafted and I'm glad that I didn't read this like six months ago because it probably would have killed me with toxic horny poisoning at that point in my life. I'm normal now.
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300 Followers Event!!
guys this is insane 😭 ive been on tumblr for like six months??
anygays!! i have a new thingy to celebrate my like... milestone or whatever
so. as yall know (maybe?) i write microfics. (i also sometimes write full fics but shh we dont talk abt my google drive folders-)
but as i was saying, i write microfics. and i also dont have nearly enough fics on ao3. so why not make an event where people send in a word or a prompt or a ship or whatever and make that a collection of work??
great idea, right?
right????
anygays, here we go again!!
EM'S EMPORIUM (v2)
ignoring how i reused the name from last time-
you guys can give me prompts and characters and ships and stuff via asks, and you'll probably get something back. but those are just the instructions :)
(lasts from 2/26 to 5/01 before i post the collection)
(this is also specifically targeted towards the marauders fandom ppl)
FOR FOLLOWERS:
✨ - i come up with fic prompts, ships and stuff included
🥳 - ...and they all lived happily ever after!! (no voldemort)
🥺 - whump
🫶 - getting together
🎵 - song inspired (need name of song)
🫠 - give me a ship and ill kill one of the people and make the other suffer
FOR MOOTS:
💀 - i kill off a character in the most heart-wrenching way i can think of (character needed)
🤑 - any au (just tell me which one)
🥹 - angst with a happy ending
🔪 - horror/thriller/murder is involved somehow??
😍 - soulmate au
🗣️ - you give me a prompt. any prompt. and i will write it into a microfic. (i dont do smut tho im a minor :D)
also moots can do the followers stuff too lmao in case that wasnt already implied 😭
a few tags under the cut:
@antarescamusxo @outromoony @eloose @whydousernamesevenexist @matty-os-blog @thebibutterflyao3@rainystarssx @d3l-official @boba-pearl @n1c0tin3 @m0ssywill0w @wylanlupin
@bralnwashed @madame-marauder @iliveonblandfanfics @sweetest-thing-in-hell @reptilian-rapscallian @criimsonreg @tastelessleather @my-castles-crumbling @therewasnofloorbtw @wyndigos-blog @starkayezer @moonandstarshangoutinbars @amy-harper @reguluskeys @noblehouseofgay @aesthetic-writer18
@dutifullynervouscreation @equippedtolove @allonsy-moony @thequeen0fhearts @lienspien @abs0l3m @dandelionflowery @ethan-torchios-bitch @julia-lokidottier @estellethewriter @arch-angeless @discoveredreality @anything-for-my-moony-1971
@tea-blankets-andstars @finntheworm81 @hmyrine @charlie-kelly-variant @wolfstar-love-child @blakelakely @ashstillalive @smuttylyra @almostdecaffeinatedfun @love-hate-love00 @will-you-be-a-satanist-with-me
@taleofapart-timepoet @ttroubledwaters @aletharaej @lambthebeloathed @lady-stardust-sang @forensic-b1tch-aiden @star-and-moon-shipper @adhara2034 @lover-of-astraeus @corey-writes-stuff @sxmnc @wishiwereheather13 @regulus-cannot-swim @yourlocalbadgerscales @hotteststar @moutainrusing
#also ignoring how i never did a 200 followers event-#and yes im also aware i mightve tagged some pple twice#im sorry 😭#emi yaps#300 followers#300 follower event#follower milestone#milestone celebration#tumblr milestone#marauders
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