#and then some defiant and angry voice in my head says 'well now i want to knit MORE!'

[sassysousa]

😩😮‍💨 The wrist pain is a result of, not punishment for, doing work with my hands. Take the pain killers. 😔

Trying to remind myself that im allowed to take painkillers even if the pain is "my fault".

A migraine is a result of, not a punishment for forgetting to eat - take the painkillers.

Back pain is a result of, not a punishment for poor posture - take the painkillers.

Sore joints are a result of, not a punishment for overexertion - take the painkillers.

Pain is not a punishment for a mistake. Painkillers are there to ease suffering. There is no glory in misery. There is no virtue in agony.

[i-cant-sing]

Yandere batfam with a sick reader?

Yes but sick reader who is still defiant because hello, they kidnapped you?????

Reader is just glaring at them with tired eyes and a red nose as they once again tuck her under the covers, Dick is highly worried as he frets over you like a mama hen because he did have a heart attack when he caught you standing in front of your open window, where "harsh" gusts of cold air were "attacking your fragile form", so of course, he had to drag you in and wrap his arms around you, rub his cheek against you because he NEEDS to warm you immediately, lest you die of hypothermia.

Yes, Dick overreacts. And yes, Damian will accompany his brother in his delusions, or well, take any chance he gets to scold you.

"You should be in bed, Y/n." Damian said sternly, his eyes narrowed because how dare you worry his favourite brother like this. "Didn't Dick tell you to rest? Are you that incapable of following simple commands?"

You narrowed your eyes back at him, opening your mouth to say something mean but got cut off by your own coughing fit, making Dick rush to help you drink some water, rubbing your back along it. Your throat felt scractchy, and it hurt to speak, but you still wanted to convey your feelings so-

You flipped him off. For a nano second, because Dick immediately grabbed your hand and tucked it back under the covers while Damian's eyes widened at you disrespect, but before he could make any more gremlin noises, but Bruce walked in and Damian knew better than to complain to him about you when youre already sick, cause Bruce wouldve still favoured you.

"Y/n? How do you feel now?" Bruce asked, his voice gentle as he walked closer to where Dick was throwing away your mountain of tissues.

"Im fine. I wanna go out-" "No." "And why not?" "Because youre sick." "You may be Batman, but youre not a doctor!" "I am your father though."

No, youre not. You wanted to say, but knew that would only piss him off and you need to be on his good side if you want Dick and the others to be off your back so that you can escape.

"Whats her temperature?" Bruce asked Dick, who put a thermometer in your mouth quickly. Dick sighed as he told Bruce how you were out of bed and standing in your balcony in the cold just moments ago.

Bruce placed a palm over your forehead, and you tried to move away but there wasnt really any space or energy for you to do that. Bruce's eyes shifted the slightest bit at your burning forehead. "Why do you insist on getting out of bed and sleeping on the floor? Ive already had to pick you up 3 times in the past 2 days."

You pulled out the thermometer and glared at him. "Im fine. Its just sniffles." Bruce's lip quirked a little. You looked absolutely adorable in your delirious state, like an angry kitten.

"I dont think its just sniffles this time. And-" Bruce pulled the thermometer from your hands that you were hiding under the covers. "-dont hide the thermometer from me." His eyes scanned it and the twitch in his brow was enough for Dick to know that the number was too high.

Bruce then eyed the cough syrup next to your side table- its still full.

"Why havent you been taking your medicine?"

"Im not sick-"

"White paint has more color than you do right now. So why havent you been taking the medicine?" Bruce asked and even though he was a little annoyed, he had enough practice dealing with the other kid's rebellious phases to have the patience of a saint.

You shrugged. "How do I know its just cough syrup and not a sedative?" "It is a sedative too. Its supposed to make you sleepy." "Well, I dont wanna sleep and let my guard down in a house full of 5 strange men." You obviously never counted Alfred- hes the only normal one here- except for the part that he wont call the cops for you, but oh well.

Bruce just casted a look to Dick and before you knew it, Dick was pinching your nostrils close and titling your head up while Bruce grabbed the syrup and poured some in your mouth before clamping his hand over it. You struggled to break free, but you were obviously no match to them. Still, tears of frustration pricked your eyes as you looked at them in betrayal and hatred.

"Drink this and dont argue with me, please." Bruce said- well, he genuinely requested at this point.

You didnt have much of a choice other than swallowing it.

With a defiant glare, you begin closing your eyes as your body gave into the effects of the drug, the last thing that you felt were Bruce kissing your forehead while Dick pecked your cheek.

Jason finally decides to drop by the Wayne manor, only to be greeted with the sight of reader lying on the kitchen floor. His heart stopped for a moment- you werent breathing-

"Y/n!" He rushed to your side, only to be smacked in the face by you.

"Shush. Dont be too loud." Your voice sounded like sandpaper against rocks.

Jason huffed. "Well, sorry for freaking out. I thought you were dead-"

"From a cough? Im not weak."

"Yeah? So, what exactly are you doing on the cold floor in the middle of the night?"

"..."

"Well?"

"What? So I cant even take a nap in this house? Jesus Christ, am I allowed to have any autonomy here?"

"Y/n." Jason called, clearly unamused by your sarcasm.

"Fine. I may have fallen and then didnt have the energy to get up, so im just catching my breath here."

"Why are you even out of bed?"

"I was hungry and Im not gonna drink another spoon of Alfred's bland soup again." Alfred made it bland on purpose so that your throat wouldnt be irritated.

"Please stop wasting whats left of your voice on complaints of the soup that you cant even taste." Jason chuckled as he picked you up, only for you to push at his chest weakly.

"I dont need your help. I can walk on my own."

Jason quirked a brow. "If you can make it to the front door without fainting or throwing up, I'll help you escape." You stared at the front door- it wasnt too far, but judging by the fact that its even hard for you to breathe properly and that youve fainted way too many times by just standing for more than a couple of minutes.

But youre stubborn. With great effort, you pushed yourself off Jason and used the kitchen island to pull yourself up. Jason decided to walk in front of you and stand near the kitchen exit because he really wanted to see your struggling face.

You took a trembling step, then another, one hand still using the support of the island until it ended and you were only a couple of feet away from Jason. At this point, you were already out of breath and when you took another step, your legs gave out and the room began spinning.

Luckily, Jason was quick to react. "Alright, just place your arm around mine- or just fall on me, that works too." He teased when you couldnt hold your body weight.

You slumped in his arms. "Just take me to my room." You huffed.

"Alright." Jason lifted your legs up and carried you back up the stairs. "You know you'd get better a lot faster if you just stayed in bed and took your medicine on time. Wouldnt that make your chances of escaping the manor better?"

You stared at him blankly. "Wow. The world must be ending for Jason Todd to be making logical suggestions."

Jason rolled his eyes as he tucked you in bed. "Im just saying, if you get better faster, you'll get to try running from us quicker too."

How do you explain to him that you just dont want to comply to them, even when they're helping you. How do you explain that you dont wanna listen to them because the soft pitiful, patronising look they get in their eyes when they look at you makes you wanna scream and carve your skin out. These are strangers, rich men who just kidnapped you to be a part of their family. No one is that kind. And nothing ever comes for free. Nothing.

"Do you need something? Food, perhaps?" Jason asked. You shook your head. "No, I think Im gonna throw up."

"Oh shit." Jason was hauling his ass out of the room t get you a bucket, only to return with a backpack.

You barely held your puke as you asked. "Wait- whose is this?"

"I dont know!? Damian's?!"

You grinned. "Oh, perfect." You proceeded to throw up into Damian's bag. That little shit just got on your nerves.

BONUS:

"I know you have attachment issues with your blanket but its been a couple of days now and you need to let me wash it." Dick said, trying to tug it out of your grip.

You sniffled and glared. "Im not a child who needs their blankie, Dick. Im just too cold without it and no other blanket can warm me up the same way it does."

"Give the blankie, Y/n." Dick said seriously.

"Its not a blankie." You retorted, but before you could react, Tim suddenly grabbed you while Dick ripped away the blanket. And even though he immediately replaces it with a clean blanket, you still let out a gut wrenching cry

"You'll have it back tomorrow-" Tim starts saying, only for you to sneeze directly in his face, making him freeze.

"And that's why we use tissues." Dick says, wiping both your nose and Tim's face with tissues, while you're not making any effort to suppress the grin that comes on your lips.

[mazeinthemiroh]

Hiii, first of all I love your works soooo much you're such a good writer.

I'm craving some ansgt (with happy ending) so I was thinking of a 2 part scenario with ateez : 1. You've have a big fight 2. You're making up . Or just one of the two if you're too busy . Or anything ansgty if fine . Sorry I talk too much . Have a good day /night <3<3<3<3

ateez in an argument with their s/o (part 1)

genre: ANGST, hurt, drama 😩

word count: 2.6k

warnings: cursing, general toxicity, obviously loads of angst

a/n: sorry this took me so fricking long to do, i wanted it to be perfect for you 🙏 let me know what you thought and send a request in the askbox for part 2 of this so you can be notified when i post it. anyone else who wants to be tagged in part to let me know~ hope you all enjoy <3

edit: here is part 2

hongjoong

"why are you so angry about all this?"

"you gave me a reason to be angry, y/n. a very good reason."

this is what it was like on the way home. constant bickering and arguing and shouting at each other. now that you had ripped the door open to your apartment and marched into your shared bedroom, you knew the arguments were only going to continue.

"and what reason was that?" you looked him dead in the eye now. your faces were edging closer and closer to his, a defiant glare sparkling in your eyes. hongjoong glared back. his eyes were just as powerful as ever. calculative. observant. deadly.

"you knew what you were doing," his tone was lower than usual, venomous to the ears. "you knew i hated him in the first place. but you just had to have your fun."

"i was just talking to him!" your voice had an extra kick of volume now, trying to dominate and squash his intimidating presence. this was a task that proved very challenging.

"it's not my fault your jealous of every other person i speak to," you defended

"but he's not every other person though!" you could see the vein in his neck show from the intensity of his emotions. "it was him. that's the point of all this. you just wanted to get back at me for the little argument we had earlier. so you did what you thought would hurt me the most. well, there you have it. well done, you hurt me."

"wow know what, if you think i would ever intentionally hurt you, that hurts me more than anything. and maybe if we're arguing all the time, maybe we shouldn't be together at all," the tears came as quickly as they fell. you had grabbed your coat and bag, heading for the door. you didn't think anything else could hurt you. but you were wrong.

what hurt the most was that he didn't stop you.

seonghwa

seonghwa could barely look you in the eyes right now.

"look, i don't want to argue," his tone was soft, but there was a twinge of urgency that came with it. he didn't know what to do anymore. he was exhausted. he was worried. he was everything but happy.

"i don't want to argue either, hwa" you gazed over at him, looking dejected and uncomfortable. you weren't sure why you kept calling him by his little pet name because you were far from being playful at this moment. you crossed your arms over your chest as you spoke up, "but it's either we talk about this or we don't talk at all."

"why do you have to make everything so difficult?" seonghwa snapped, now looking at you with eyes of cruelty. your heart dropped.

"why does everything have to be such a big deal? why can't you just let things go?" seonghwa's voice seemed to be getting louder and louder with each question. or maybe that's just how it felt.

"you're in this relationship too, hwa" you did decide to hold onto that pet name after all; it felt like the only endearing thing you had left to say. your voice grew quiet. you didn't want to argue. you just wanted to fix this. but it felt like you were the only one.

"do you not want to fight for us? why can't you just accept that we haven't been okay for a long time," your breath heaved quickly, but your slumped posture looked like you'd been defeated. "and the only way to sort this out is by talking about it."

seonghwa scanned your face and shook his head, looking away once more. his prior outburst had settled down and now he just wanted to be alone.

"i'm done talking now," seonghwa muttered, closing his eyes. he couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth, but the hopelessness took over. "i'm done fighting for this."

you'd have never thought your boyfriend to give up so easily on something. but your relationship? you? that was something that you'd always figured he'd stick by for.

yunho

yunho had unlocked the door to your shared apartment at 2:37 in the morning. on coming home before this, he made sure to tiptoe around the apartment, hop in the shower as quietly as possible, get ready for bed as silent as anything, before making his way to the bedroom.

"oh," he muttered in mild surprise, not expecting to see you awake. you had a book in your hands that you were scarcely reading, and the lamp to your side shining bright against the darkness. "you're awake?"

"i am actually," you say in a short, sarcastic tone. your jaw tightened as you carefully placed your bookmark between the pages and set the book aside, turning off the lamp in the same movement.

yunho stood there for a moment. the room felt still and cold. he looked at you, curled up with your back to him now. he could feel the sadness fizzle in the air. he knew he messed up but he was so tired. so, so tired.

crawling into his side of the bed, he gently tugged the covers over him, not saying a word. he didn't want to speak, but he felt he owed you at least something.

"i'm sorry" he murmured, eyes flashing closed as he breathed a shaky breath out.

"how many times have you said that this week?" you replied, weakly. you were tired too. tired of his excuses, his empty promises, his apologies. they felt like nothing anymore. he had let you down too many times.

he replied with nothing. he had nothing else to say. he thought it would be wise not to say anything at all. just sleep will do. sleep for a clearer mind. even being as tired as he was, he couldn't for the life of him drift off. and neither could you.

it was a long night for both of you. and while you were inches away from each other, you could have never felt farther away.

yeosang

you had been trying to get your boyfriend to talk to you for about 15 minutes now. it was a chore. it was exhausting. but you knew something was wrong and you weren't going to let him suffer alone.

"you really like pushing people to the limits, don't you?" yeosang snapped in response to your persistence. he glared at you with watery eyes, his lips pressed in a firm, straight line.

"i'm concerned for you," you retorted back, "what, am i not allowed to care about my boyfriend anymore?"

yeosang looked away from you. he was usually quiet but this was different. it was a painful type of quiet. you knew your boyfriend all too well to know he wasn't alright. and you didn't want him to be alone and wallow in his feelings.

you took in a deeper sigh and tried a softer approach. "you can tell me anything, yeo" you slid an arm around him, but his head leaned away from you.

"you care too much, it's suffocating" yeosang closed his eyes and shook his head, "i just want to be left alone, what don't you understand about that?" his tone was harsh. you had never seen him like this, which confirmed that he wasn't himself at all.

but his brutality got to you, and before you knew it, you started tearing up. you knew you should be supportive and just accept his wishes to leave him be, but it was hard to go on when you knew he was upset. you felt so torn.

"i'm sorry," your voice cracked underneath the pressure of emotion as you began to leave the room. there was nothing more you could say to him.

yeosang finally lifted his head, his eyes following your figure as you walked away from him. there was a distinct lonely feeling that filled his heart, making it ache. the absence of you weighed heavier on him than anticipated, and he missed you. god, he missed you.

maybe he didn't want to be alone after all...

san

you had come over to spend time with your boyfriend... initially...

it wasn't your fault. you just got a bit side-tracked. yunho and wooyoung were there and it had been a while since you had spoken to them. it was such a pleasure seeing them again since you got on so well.

but san's mood was depleted. his energy zapped. he phased out of reality as you continued to chatter away to his friends, staring at the wall with a glaze over his eyes. he hadn't said a word all night.

it was only until the others left that you actually gave him attention. and that was when you realised you hadn't spoken to him all night.

"you okay, sweetie?" you placed a hand on his bicep, getting him to look into your eyes defiantly.

"don't call me that" he grumbled and pushed your hand away, his arms crossing over his chest.

"what's the matter with you?"

"i invited you round so you could spend the night with me. but you were so much more interested in wooyoung and yunho." san glared at the floor. he realised how pathetic he sounded. how desperate his tone was. but he didn't care at this point.

"i hadn't seen them in a while, san. if you wanted it to just be me in you then you could've dismissed them," you held your ground, shaking your head at his childishness. "besides, you could've joined in the conversation instead of moping about by yourself, my god."

you rolled your eyes and moved away from him in a huff. san sighed and didn't move from his position. he couldn't tell if he was being unreasonable or totally justified. all he could tell was that he was hurt and angry, so the tears stung his eyes.

"i don't get a lot of time with you, y/n," he sniffed, "but by the looks of it you were having more fun talking to them than we've had in a long time."

his jaw clenched as he felt your presence stand there, taking in his thoughts, before leaving the room altogether.

mingi

"it was just a performance, y/n. it's not a big deal."

it was a big deal. at least, to you it was. you've been supporting mingi for as long as you can remember. from the moment he debuted, you were always behind him, encouraging him from the sidelines. and his career flourished. it amazed you just how quickly it did. and with his talents came more opportunities and privileges at award shows.

you didn't realise one of those 'privileges' would be to sexy dance with another idol.

"not a big deal?" you stared at him, wide-eyed and amazed by his words. at first you wondered if you were just overreacting. but his careless brush-offs turned the alarm bells off in your head. "mingi, you have got to be kidding me. she was practically grinding all over you. i had to watch that happen, among all the other thousands of people watching."

"and so what if they watched?" mingi's voice rose in volume, causing you to flinch at the sudden severity of his voice. despite having a deep voice all the time, mingi never used such a harsh tone towards you. it made your heart drop. "it's my job. they watch me do performances all the time. just because this performance happened to be with another idol doesn't mean anything."

his words hurt you more than you could say. but your hurt was spat out in anger, something you couldn't control beyond this point.

"everyone is saying how good you look together," your voice lowered in defeat, "how you should be together. even other idols are saying that."

"is that what this is about?" mingi breathed out a laugh of disbelief before his eyes turned serious, "you're just insecure."

you would have never thought he, of all people, would say that. you lowered your head and stared at your feet.

he only realised how much he hurt you when a tear trickled down your cheek. but by that point, it was too late.

wooyoung

"y/n, i'm not in the mood."

this was a phrase you were hearing all too frequently from your boyfriend. it was enough to drive you crazy. but you had kept silent, up until now. now was the last straw.

it was like he hated you. every time you touched him he would withdraw. even light touches like holding hands or linking arms; he wanted none of it. this was so unlike him. he was the one that usually initiated the physical affection. cuddles were his speciality and he couldn't go seven minutes without holding you. and you love that. but now, everything was one-sided.

"you're not in the mood a lot these days," you commented. your intent was to sound harsh, it really was. but all he could hear was the hurt and pain in your voice, and that tugged at his heart a little. "have i done something, woo?"

"don't be like that," wooyoung sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"no but seriously. are you not attracted to me anymore? has something happened between us? what am i missing?" you pleaded for him to answer you.

"shut up, you sound ridiculous" he snapped, a firm glare shooting into your eyes. there was too much swirling around in his mind for him to take everything in. to take in how he sounded and what he said to you. you could see the unbothered, thoughtlessness in his gaze and saw that he had just given up.

"not even gonna dignify me with an answer, huh?" you sniffed back your tears as you got up from your seat, grabbing the coat you had only recently left on the chair, and making your way for the door. you needed to get away.

if he wasn't going to dignify you with an answer, you weren't going to dignify him with your presence.

jongho

you let an exasperated laugh out, but things were far from funny. in fact, you genuinely couldn't believe what you were hearing right now.

"let me get this fucking straight," the increase in volume of your voice told jongho to run, but he was no coward. he stood his ground and stared at you expectantly. "you think that your job is more important than mine? is that what i'm hearing?"

"i never ever said that," jongho immediately shot back, not missing a beat, "but my job is more physically, psychologically and emotionally demanding. that's just a fact."

"why is this a fucking competition?"

"it's not" jongho practically growled his words back. he couldn't believe that you were both caught in an argument that was so trivial. "i just get exhausted when your moaning about the struggles of your job when there's so much going on with mine."

you shook your head, arms crossing over your chest as you gritted your teeth. "am i not allowed to express myself to you? to tell you my worries? that's what boyfriends are supposed to be there for. if you're not willing to do that then-"

"then what? then i shouldn't be your boyfriend?" jongho spoke before he could think, a tendency he never had. he was losing his head to the heat of the argument; he let his emotions get the better of him.

raising your eyebrows in surprise, you stepped back from the one you loved most. you couldn't read his expression, but you sincerely hoped he regretted those words.

"if that's how you feel, then maybe you shouldn't be" your voice was soft now, weak and without sustenance. shoulders lowering, you gazed at the floor, feeling your cheeks heat up tremendously.

a hopelessness fell upon you both. the atmosphere felt so thick it was suffocating. it felt as if the light that was once between you had been extinguished.

[vacantgodling]

i know what you’re saying

wip: paramour (slums au)

characters: amon (16) & hya (18; who goes by ‘cinth’ in this au)

cinth has made up his mind, even if that decision breaks amon.

tw(s): none unless you feel weird about teens kissing ig. also the girls are fighting but it devolves into emotional things.

“They’re just gonna laugh at you!” Amon finally shouted. His voice reverberated through the alleyway, shaking the brick foundations to their core. Cinth stared at him, wide-eyed. “They’re going to laugh and say ‘who the fuck is this wannabe bastard, fake-rich loser who’s just asking for fucking handouts because his daddy dropped him’!”

“You don’t fucking know that.” As always, when Cinth got angry, his already deep voice dropped to a visceral near growl, but his eyes were still wider and flightier than Amon knew was his real anger. He must’ve swung a hammer at some wedged in nail of insecurity that dug deep into the pits of Cinth’s chest.

Amon did what he did best. He stepped into Cinth’s space and pushed. Literally pushed—shoving the older teen back into the brick behind him as if to instill some fight in him. Amon was never good with words. He was only good with his fists. He expected Cinth to shove him back—shove him like when they were kids and ended up on the ground in a heap, pulling each other’s hair and shouting at each other, then eating frozen cream together an hour later. But this wasn’t that kind of fight. He saw it in Cinth’s eyes. Saw Cinth’s hands ball into fists by his side; saw his jaw clench. But he didn’t swing. He squared his stance, but didn’t take the bait.

“I belong there.” Cinth insisted—defiant, but almost like he was trying to tell himself that. “Just because ma is a streetwalker doesn’t mean my father wasn’t from money. It doesn’t mean that some of that inheritance isn’t mine.”

“They don’t care about that shit up there!” Amon sneered. He didn’t know how else to make Cinth get it. They didn’t care what Cinth was or wasn’t owed—to them, he was an outsider. An outsider who was taking money they’d rather shove in their pockets. They wouldn’t stand for that, they’d sooner throw him into Debtor’s Labyrinth than fork over money. “It’s the law.” Cinth said factually, jaw clicking. Amon stared at him like he’d grown two heads.

“You think they care about law? Hell—when have you ever cared about law?” Amon gestured around them, not just to the dawn-dark alley they were shouting in, but to all of Lower Halifax in its entirety. “This place exists there is no fucking law that anyone gives a damn about!”

“I don’t care about the law morally, dipshit.” Cinth growled. “I care about it legally. They can’t disinherit me if I have proof of my birth and that my father knew of me—”

“You don’t—”

“I do.” Cinth finally did react and he pushed himself into Amon’s space. Even though he had to look up at him now, looking down into Cinth’s deep brown eyes with fire and brimstone raging behind them wasn’t any less knee-weakening. Amon felt his chest start to pound harder; adrenaline for a fight, maybe. But also that something else that he never wanted to put a name to.

“What the fuck do you think I’ve been doing for the past eight months? Going up to Upper Halifax for my health?”

“Well I wouldn’t fucking know!” Amon threw his hands up. “You wouldn’t tell me shit!”

“Because I know you,” And oh how that stung. “And I knew you’d react like this.”

“Even if you have some grounds to stand on they still won’t accept you. They’ll find some way to push you out.” Cinth only stared at him. Maybe petulantly, if you accounted for the downturn of his lips and furrow of his brows, but mostly just in annoyance. “I know. Because the same happened to me when I was there.” He’d never told Cinth this. Why was he telling him this. Cinth didn’t say anything and didn’t give him any yay or nay to continue, but Amon found that now that he was saying it, he couldn’t stop talking.

“My mom. She—she died. Y’know? The scars I have. I should’ve been dead too. But at the hospital this… this couple—like old money rich couple from Dalry or something like… The Farrah’s okay? They took me in. Paid for my health. Nursed me. Told me they couldn’t have kids and so they wanted me to be their child. I—I couldn’t. I mean. I tried. For the second year I was there. Went to some Galas and like…. tried doing the noble thing but like. If it wasn’t my scars, then it was that I didn’t belong. The other kids they—fuck, they were peachy compared to the adults. They looked at Lady Farrah so… disgusted. I heard her crying herself to sleep and like. I couldn’t take it anymore. I came back. Here. I thought I made a shit choice but then, I met you, and like—you can’t just l-leave me.” Amon’s barely pubescent voice finally cracked. He was biting down hard on his tongue to try and keep his lower lip from trembling but it was far too late for that now.

And even worse, suddenly the tension in the air just drained. Drained because Amon was biting his tongue and sniffing and looking absolutely pathetic in front of Cinth, who was regarding him impassively. The fight left his stance, but he didn’t reach out. Yet. Well—Amon knew Cinth was shit at comforting anyway, and he’d learned by now never to expect him to. So, color him surprised when Cinth out of nowhere reached out and gently tugged him by the front of his ragged ass linen shirt, and wrapped his arms around him for a tentative embrace. It was strange, and clinical—yet more than anything he’d ever offered in terms of affection before.

Amon clutched the back of Cinth’s marginally nice satin shirt like a lifeline between his fingers, hunched over into Cinth’s arms, and began to slowly release the dam of emotions building behind his eyes.

It was a long moment before either of them spoke.

“I’m not leaving forever.” Cinth’s voice was hushed, and burned itself like a prayer into the shell of Amon’s ears. “Just for a little while.”

“Even that’s too much.” Amon mumbled. Selfishly, he squeezed Cinth tighter. “It’s too much to ever be away from you.” He had to know what he meant. Had to.

“Would you come with me?” This whisper was even quieter than the first. It was like Cinth could barely stand to say it but…

“What about Knox? Erecia? Your mom?” Amon said into the crook of Cinth’s neck as tears finally managed to flow further than his eyes. “I’m asking you.” The usual edge returned to Cinth’s voice, even though he was still holding Amon, for Vat’s sake.

It was a long moment before Amon said: “You know I can’t.” Why he couldn’t—Amon barely knew himself. But he just… he knew. Somewhere deep inside of him, an uncharted part of a map of his soul he wasn’t prepared for.

“Then I’m going.” Cinth’s voice was firm. “… Alone.” He finally said and Amon’s heart shattered. Cinth finally pulled back to look at him. His gaze was unreadable—but it always was. Never had Amon more desperately wanted to know what he was thinking, or what he would say.

He didn’t expect that Cinth would tug him again, pulling him down by his shirt once more, but this time until their faces were aligned and Cinth pressed a kiss to his startled lips. And he didn’t pull away immediately either—that’s how Amon thought their first kiss would go ever since he’d dreamed it nearly 4 years ago. He kept pressing, waiting for Amon to react and begin to melt like wax over an open fire. And when Amon pressed back, returning that effortless pressure, Cinth surprised him even more by tilting his head and opening his mouth. A rough, startled “mm!” left Amon’s lips, because he was helpless to this soft, thorough, determined kiss that by the end of it left both of them breathless.

Cinth cleared his throat after a minute.

“I swear I’ll be back for you.”

And what else could Amon do but nod, still dumbstruck when Cinth finally detangled himself from their impromptu embrace. They didn’t say another word because, really… what else could be said? Cinth was going to leave and not even love was enough to make him stay. That stung more than it should’ve. Really. And as Cinth walked into the morning dawn, his plans and opportunities ripe for the execution, Amon turned his back away from it, slipping effortlessly back into the false midnight of Central Halifax.

[lunarmoonanons]

To Love a Daughter

🌕 🌖 🌗 🌘 🌑 🌒 🌓 🌔 🌕  

Jaehaerys truly loves all his children. Right?

🌕 🌖 🌗 🌘 🌑 🌒 🌓 🌔 🌕  

Masterlist 

Jaehaerys loved all his children, truly he did. But he always favored his daughter YN the most. She was such a pleasant agreeable child ever since she was a babe. So when the chance presented itself to spend time with his daughter he always took it. Such was the case for this morning, as he had no real pressing matter to attend to today Jaehaerys requested to walk with his daughter around the Red Keep. YN of course agreed as she loved her father and could never say no to him. 

“Did you enjoy the ball thrown for you my dear one?” Jaehaerys asked, arm linked with his daughter. 

The 13 year old smiled at her father and patted his arm. “Of course. I loved the music and seeing all the lovely dresses. Oh and of course attempting to make a friend was quite fun”

“My shy YN? Making a new friend? How unheard of.” Jaehaerys teased his daughter and pinched her cheek. 

“Oh don’t tease me father. It’s hard enough finding someone here who I like talking to that isn’t my family.” YN whined. 

“You are quite the shy child my dear one.” Jaehaerys sighed and led his daughter down to the throne room. “I am glad you found one man agreeable. Ser Coren Thorne seems to be an honorable man.”

“I am glad you decided that our friendship was appropriate. I hope we have a long friendship.” YN looked to the ground and twiddled her thumbs. 

“Have you written any new poems lately? The court does enjoy them so much.” 

“I have written a few lines recently. Nothing I wish to present yet. Father, can I ask you something?” 

Jaehaerys stopped their walk then turned to his daughter. YN never usually asked for things, and when she did it always pertained to Saera. It was as though he hated his willful daughter, but he found her becoming more and more difficult to handle. Jaehaerys prayed to the gods she would be the perfect daughter that YN was. With every passing day Saera grew defiant as the wind. Yet the two were inseparable no matter how different their personalities were, and despite the effort Jaehaerys had put in to steer YN to more well behaved influences. 

“What is it my dear?” Jaehaerys readied himself to see her disappointed face. 

“Do you hate Saera?” YN whispered, looking at the ground. 

“What?”

“It’s just… You always seem to get angry quickly when you two speak. You have no common ground. You fight so often nowadays that we keep you separated just to keep the noise down. It feels as though you hate her. So do you?” YN hated confrontation, but she needed to ask. For her sister. 

“YN… I don't hate your sister.” Jaehaerys sighed and pulled his daughter in for a hug. “I know how much you love your sister and you want to keep her happy.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” YN’s voice was muffled. 

“I don’t hate Saera. She just frustrates me with her actions. I just wish she would obey and listen to me more.” Jaehaerys sighed once again. He pulled away and held his daughter’s face in his hands before placing a kiss on her head. “I don’t hate any of my children. Understand?”

“Yes father.” YN whispered. 

“Now run along, I have some business to attend to.” Jaehaerys shooed away YN and watched her run out of the throne room. He sighed once more and rubbed his face with his hand. Perhaps he was too harsh on his daughter, he just wished she was someone other than herself. 

He just wished she was like her younger sister.

@the-phantom-of-arda​ @missglaskin​

[jmdbjk]

Set me free. A battle cry.

I still think it’s too soon for me to be voicing my thoughts on Set Me Free Pt. 2 but there’s so much going on in my head I have to let some of it out. I’m not an expert on music, the writing or production of it, or on choreography, or on K-pop. What I am is an appreciator and observer of art. And I attempt to express in words my emotions and thoughts while viewing the art. 

First of all... OH MY FUCKING GOD.

Now that I got that out of the way, I want to say I am so proud of Jimin: #1 on U.S. iTunes with all those other releases happening at the same time. And #1 Trending Now on YouTube. Also I think I saw fastest 100 #1′s on iTunes globally EVER (thank you for correcting me). But I know these charts are not the motivation behind his art.

So it begins with some angst with dramatic choir vocals... building up to a crescendo. The music includes a siren-like sound... things are getting critical. The dancers writhing and mimicking screams, invoking chaos, turmoil, pain and anguish.

And then Jimin appears suddenly and the dancers at once jump into order... chaos/order. 

It’s like Jimin’s own psyche with the two sides fighting within. 

The choreo tells the story of the lyrics: “I wandered in a maze, Hennessy and night.” On a path searching for the prize/end and especially these past few years, living a life full of luxury. We know Jimin is a night owl (maybe that is too literal of an interpretation perhaps). 

The autotune vocals add texture and are reminiscent of different voices talking in his head. It’s like using his own voice to role play his different emotions/colors within him: “Finally free; AH YEAH, AH YEAH; I’m standing at the edge; NOT YET, NOT YET; I won’t look back; NOW YEAH, NOW YEAH; fly away, butterfly, finally free” ... 

The choreo here where he mimics a butterfly with his body, fluid and lithe. I literally expected him to levitate during this dance move. 

“Going insane to stay sane. Raise your hands for the past me. Now set me free.” This is where I literally cried. Oh, Jimin.  

The dancers representing the world around him... at the same time are the confines of his vocation as well as his comrades... part of the constriction and also his saviors. His freedom as well as his box. Chaos and order.

At 1:52 the scene goes dark and one of the dancers reaches over to Jimin’s torso and I am assuming at some point, we will see this is deliberate for a reason. When the lights come back up they are a different color, colder, Jimin’s torso is bare with the words of the poem marching across his body in very straight orderly lines (needless to say, my jaw hit the floor).

It is as if the color of the light represents both sides. Hot chaos. Cold order. I think this part of the song is his inner turmoil. It has a different voice. Very angry. Very aggressive. Nothing like the Jimin we’ve known up until now.

The dancers pointing at him, his naysayers. That’s right Jimin, tell them to fuck off. He’s played by the rules up until now. It’s his turn to flip the table and upend what we’ve known. And wow, he succeeded.

The dancers lifting their fists and arms as if in triumph.

Jimin letting himself be offered up to the sky...the lifting and reaching for the sky/heaven.. higher and higher...  

The resurrection of New Jimin at the end. The direct defiant stare at us. With his back to us. What is he saying? He’s moving on? Are we following? We better get our fighting gear on and go. 

The visuals, his attitude. So many elements: the numerology, the golden spiral (fibonacci sequence), the set mimicking the panopticon. A prison. Caged like a beautiful bird. A place he entered of his own free will but ended up being a place where he was put on display to be criticized and judged for not being what everyone thinks he should be. 

Knowing some of Jimin‘s history, knowing a little bit about his personality and seeing how all of this has come together in this piece of art he’s created just makes me appreciate him even more as the deep thinker he is, a highly talented artist, singer, and dancer, and especially a deeply feeling human being. 

I don’t ever recall anything like this making me overcome with shock or being moved to tears or being made to feel so many different things in the span of three minutes and forty-four seconds as I did last night. 

The nature of art itself is to draw out your emotions. To move you. I was moved.

I am 100% certain on each subsequent time I listen to this song or watch the music video there will be something that will elicit something else within me and inspire another different thought or feeling.

And I know it could be because Jimin‘s solo work was so highly anticipated, so talked about and we didn’t know what to expect. We know he’s been working on it for well over a year and finally seeing the climax of it all, or at least the beginning of the climax, was very overwhelming to me. I mean, promo starts for Like Crazy tomorrow. LET US BREATHE! NO! BRING IT ON!

[666writingcafe]

You Are So Lucky

Leviathan

Some time ago--I don't know when, since I've been too focused on making these costumes to glance at a clock--MC poked their head in my room to ask if I wanted to go out to eat with them and the brothers. Not wanting to stop, I told them no, but asked that they bring something home for me to eat later.

The sound of my phone buzzing interrupts my concentration, and I mutter angrily as I check to see who had the audacity to call me. Any irritation I feel melts away when I see MC's name on my screen.

"Is everything alright?" I ask when I answer the call.

"No." MC's voice is faint, as if they're trying to keep this conversation a secret. "Just listen."

"I told you, I want to order another special Babel parfait!" Great. Beel's throwing a tantrum at the restaurant that they're at. "What about that do you not understand?! I already ate the one you brought earlier, and now I want another!"

"But sir--" I feel bad for the waiter. There's no explaining anything to Beel once he's angry.

"So what if I just ate a parfait that's meant to take four people an entire hour? So what if I did it in 15 minutes? Is there something wrong with that?!"

"We only have so many ingredients, and it's a seasonal item--"

"How is that my problem?! I'm hungry! I'm hungry, I'm hungry, I'm hungry!"

"That idiot..." Whatever else Lucifer says is drowned out by a bunch of voices yelling at each other.

"Why am I listening to this?" I ask.

"Evidence," MC answers quietly, frustration evident in their voice.

"For what?" Before MC can reply, Mammon yells for people to duck as plates begin breaking.

"This is really getting out of hand." Then why aren't you doing anything to stop it, Asmo? You have the ability to charm people into doing whatever you want, after all!

"Honestly, it's high time Beel learned some patience, which is why--" Silence. Did the line go dead as Satan was talking?

"A plate of pancakes hit Satan in the face," MC commentates softly.

"Oh shit," I respond. This can't be good.

"You! How dare you throw something at me!"

"Satan, calm down." Are you dumb, Lucifer?! You never tell an angry person to calm down, especially if they're the Avatar of Wrath!

"Shut the hell up!"

"What did you say?"

"I'm sick of you and your older brother act!"

"Well, I am your older brother, after all." Lucifer pauses. "Although, in your case, I guess I'm something even greater than that?" He did not just go there.

"And if you're going to criticize me, what about you?" I guess Lucifer wasn't done berating Satan yet. "Do you have to be defiant and hostile all the fucking time? Are you capable of behaving in any other way?"

"Do you need me to come get you?" I ask MC.

"Not yet," they whisper. "Just stay on the line."

"This is all Mammon's fault." Belphie's being unreasonable. I may not like Mammon a whole lot, but even I can acknowledge that he's innocent this time.

"What?! Why?! I didn't even do anything!" You tell them, Mammon!

"If you hadn't dodged that plate when it flew at Satan, it wouldn't have hit him in the face to begin with!" I actually face-palm at Asmo's statement.

"Oh, so you're sayin' it would've been okay for it to hit me?! Well, how would you like it if a plate hit you?!" More yelling and breaking plates.

"Levi." MC's voice is the most audible it's been this entire phone call. "In case I don't make it out alive, I want you to know that I love you and care for you deeply."

"What do you mean, in case you don't make it out alive?!" Silence. My screen indicates that the call has ended.

"Son of a bitch." I get up and stretch before grabbing a jacket off the floor and rushing out of my room. "If MC dies because of this, this entire realm will feel my wrath."

[glimmerousest]

Maya crossed her legs in the middle of her bed and began to pray to the Holy Mother. Deliver me from my lack of focus. Deliver me from my lack of focus. Deliver me from Nick’s lack of focus, too. We’re not making much money. Give me a nice way to make money quick, please. Hm. This sounds more like a Google search. Sorry, Holy Mother, for failing you again. Or, rather, forgive me, Holy Mother, for not trying my hardest in Your name. In the name of justice! (is what Nick would say.) Um, sorry again.

Her phone dinged.

Sorry again, amen. She sighed, groaned, and reached over to check her notifications. It was, of course, Nick. She really should stop leaving the ringer on during her daily prayer, but it was messages like these – “Do you want ramen? It’s Edgeworth’s treat, for you!” – that never seemed to make it possible.

“Sure thing, where do I meet you?”

“Office in 20.”

Maya rolled her eyes. She never got more than half an hour lead time on the best of days. I guess it’s time to call today’s training a wash and cash in on some free food!

Just like you have every other day for the past four months, a little angry voice said inside her head. What would Mia say? She was always working so hard.

“Shut up, stupid ass,” Maya said out loud. “Mia loved her friends.”

But she wasn’t sure.

--------------------------------

That night, at the ramen shop, Maya and Phoenix arrived fashionably late and found two seats saved for them at the end of the table – one that was FAR fuller than Maya had expected. “Nick, you didn’t tell me it was a PARTY!” she exclaimed excitedly. It looked like all the tables in the place had been shoved together to accommodate them. “Who are all these people?”

Phoenix grinned abashedly. “Well, it’s not like the number of people has ever stopped you from chowing down before.”

“Whatever. I didn’t even know we had this many friends!” Maya sat down at the end of the table with a sarcastic frown, and looked to her left to introduce herself to the person seated there –

And blinked like a mouse confronted with a hawk. Well, like a Maya confronted with a hawk. Because there, staring into her eyes, was a fucking hawk. Nick’s voice faded into the background, saying, “This is the annual Tokyangeles legal gathering, and we were invited as a firm, and, you know, as assistant manager, you definitely…….”

Maya had stopped listening. The face attached to the man upon whom the hawk was perched was one she recognized from one of the darkest times in her life. She had been led by cell after cell, curious eyes peering out from the dimly-lit rooms to see who was being paraded through this time, and met the piercing eyes of one man – he stood out even now in her mind, sad and defiant and ANGRY, so angry, just like her – no, Maya FEY is not an angry person – so angry and, well, now that she was catching those eyes a second time, absolutely gorgeous.

 “Oh, it’s you! From jail!” she said, and then mentally slammed her head into the table. Not a good time, Maya.

“It’s you, from jail.” He laughed, and held out his hand. “I’m Simon Blackquill, and I work for the prosecutor’s office. Does it feel good to be out?”

“It does! I’m Maya Fey, assistant manager at Wright & Co. Law Offices. Nice to meetcha.” She looked down at her menu. “I’m starving! Nick, what are you getting?”

------------------------------------------------------

Maya, she thought, had done a remarkable job of appearing normal and delighted as she fed little tidbits to Taka, as she’d learned the hawk’s name was, and making small talk with Simon and the fellow across from him, who she had gathered was some sort of rock star. That said, she had also had plenty of that sake lychee cocktail that Edgeworth kept paying for. She had even offered to cover the tab once (a Fey clan taboo). Of course nobody accepted.

“Maya, we should probably head out soon if you want a ride,” Phoenix said, his own head clearly on a little crooked after the festivities.

Edgeworth was practically supporting him, though he didn’t look so good either. “We’re getting a cab, Miss Fey, and you’re welcome to stay at my house if you’d like. The guest bedroom, I’ve been told, is quite comfortable.”

Maya gave Simon and his rock star friend a look – Please don’t make me go home with them. The rock star grinned. “Don’t worry, Herr Edgeworth. Have a good night. We’re going to be meeting Herr Blackquill’s friends across town – isn’t that right?”

“Yes, several of my friends have installed themselves at one of our favorite bars. Please don’t worry, Prosecutor Edgeworth. We’re going to have an excellent night on the town. And YOU old folks,” Simon winked at Phoenix, “can have an excellent night in.”

“I’m twenty-nine!” Phoenix rolled his eyes, but didn’t really protest as the entire party – fourteen of them in all – followed Edgeworth, who cringed a little bit as he paid off their tab, out the door. Simon, the rock star, a fellow called Apollo who worked in Kristoph Gavin’s office, and Maya stood around gossiping a little as the older folks filed out. Edgeworth’s cab was the last to arrive, but it was black and looked more like a limo than an Uber. Maya could have sworn it was a police officer driving, too – did Maggey Byrde pick up a side gig?

“Good night, Klavier, Simon,” said Edgeworth as he hustled Phoenix into the back of his cab. “See you soon, Maya! Stay safe!”

She grinned, waving. “Have a good night, you two!” Thank god, now I don’t have to ask the rock star’s name again.

“Well,” said Simon finally, “who’s up for a little walk in the rain?”

[justauthoring]

The Long Wait

Prompt: Eventually, the hoping became too much to bare. Requested by: no one.

A/N: This is basically a remake of this fic -- upon re-watching the GMG arc with my mom, I couldn’t help but look back at this fic and realize how much more I could’ve done with it. Thus, this was born. Pairing: Gray Fullbuster x F!Reader

“What do you mean you’re leaving?”

Keeping your gaze trained to the ground, you absolutely refuse to look up -- because you know that if you did, your heart would break all over again.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble, words jumbled together, voice quiet that if the guild hall was so completely silent, they definitely wouldn’t have heard you. But they do, and they falter at the way you sound so absolutely broken. And of course, all of them were, but there was something different about the way you sounded -- it was like you were defeated. 

Macao steps towards her, you hear it rather then see it, and can imagine his hand stretched out towards you, trying to placate you. “Y/N, we understand--” and he halts, voice catching in the back of his throat. “We understand more then anyone how you feel, but--”

“It’s different.” You find yourself cutting in, voice sharp, and you wince at yourself because you sound so incredibly selfish and rude. Who were you to say that your pain was any different from theirs? Any worse? But, still, you continue, your emotions getting the better of you. “It’s just... different. I... I can’t be here knowing they’re... he’s gone.”

“Y/N-nee, we don’t know that they’re gone!”

Your eyes fall shut at the sound of Romeo’s voice.

“We have to keep searching for them,” he argues, defiant, adamantly shaking his head. “They’re somewhere out there, I know that. And Gray wouldn’t--”

“They’re gone,” you hiss, interrupting him and finally glancing up to regard your friends, your family. They rear back at your harsh words, and that guilt festers even deeper inside of your chest, with the way they’re looking at you. Jet and Droy look near tears, and you know they’re thinking of Levy. And Bisca and Alzack look in shock at your outburst, you’re usually so quiet and calm. Macao looks angry, and the rest just stare at you, varying reactions that all mesh together.

Because really, it’s the way Romeo looks at you, still so young, so full hope as your words basically slap him in the face.

But you’re too far gone now, and there’s no stopping you.

“It’s been two years,” you continue, voice softer but still cutting, still hurtful. “They’re not coming back. They’re never coming back.”

He’s never coming back.

They don’t respond. No one argues, even if some look like they might. Maybe they’re understanding, maybe they’re finally getting it -- it’s been too long now and no one from the island is coming back. You’d been hopeful at first, you’d been like Romeo -- you’d refused to lose hope. But your heart is broken and there’s no mending it and you can’t keep staring at those doors all day expecting, hoping, praying that he’ll walk through them only for him never to.

So, you turn, nothing but a soft, sorrowful, pathetic apology leaving your lips as you turn your backs on your friends and leave them.

And as you turn, you see his familiar face, the dark black of his hair, that drawling smirk on his lips, and his cold, but always soft when directed at you eyes looking at you, but when you blink, he’s gone.

-

You huff at the weight dropped around your shoulders, inhaling deeply when you see a familiar puff of blonde hair.

“Did you hear?”

You don’t need to ask what he means. It’s pretty obvious.

“Fairy Tail will be competing again this year.”

When you turn to look at Sting, he’s smirking -- all bright eyed and giddy, and you hold back your own snark as you regard him with a small nod. Sting was one of the few to know of the fact that you used to be part of Fairy Tail -- him and Rogue, given that they were the ones who recruited you, and then the master as well.

It wasn’t news you were eager for everyone to know. Fairy Tail was a laughing stock in all respects now, but Sabertooth seemed to have a particular fondness of mocking the way the guild had fallen. And it was easy to hide you’d ever been apart of it given you hadn’t been a particularly well-known mage back when you’d been a member. Your powers were relatively new, and with, regrettably, the help of the Twin Dragon slayers you’d definitely grown in aspects of strength.

Three years since you’d joined Sabertooth -- two years of training on your own, and three of being surrounded by much stronger mages had you adapting and constantly changing. You were practically unrecognizable.

You were known at Y/N of Sabertooth now, and it was like the Y/N of Fairy Tail never even existed at all.

“I’m surprised,” you hum, shifting as Sting moves to take a seat next to you, still whilst having an arm draped over your arm. You blink at the sudden arrival of Rogue, not having heard him, as he takes a seat in front of you, before continuing. “They weren’t in it last year, or the year before if I remember. After finishing last every year before.”

You hadn’t been apart of Sabertooth’s team, but you do remember watching.

It had been... hard, to say the least.

“Ah, well, this year they have a new team.” Rogue explains blandly.

“New members, you should say,” Sting smirks.

Brows furrowed, you shake your head at their words, confusion flooding at you at the particular gleefulness of Sting’s expression. He always got a kick out of embarrassing other teams, not even just Fairy Tail, but there was something different about the way his eyes sparkled.

Sting meets your gaze, and without wavering, adds; “or should I say, old?”

Your breath catches, and even as your mind starts spinning, you’re all too aware of the way both Sting and Rogue are watching you carefully.

You turn from Rogue to Sting, and absolutely hate the gleam in the latter’s eyes as he smirks down at you. Keeping a tight hold on you, he pulls you closer, leaning until he’s a breaths away; “it’s a good thing I managed to convince the Master to let you on the team this year, Y/N,” he grins widely, “you’ll get to reunite with your old pales.”

That... that couldn’t be possible.

They were--They were dead. They are dead.

“I... I need some fresh air.” Shoving Sting’s arm off of you, you ignore his calls and his merciless laughter as you stock out the guild doors, bypassing Minerva which you know will get you in shit later. You don’t really care in that moment, you can’t even think straight, you need air. 

You need to breathe.

Sting must be lying. He has to be lying. There’s... they were dead, it’s been seven years.

Seven years.

How... why now? Why after all this time?

And you convince yourself he isn’t lying. You ignore Sting every time he tries to talk to you, and focus on training. It would be no good if you failed since you were on the roster this year -- Master would kill you if you failed to impress him and keep Sabertooth at the very top. And it’s easy enough to do, spend all your time training, pushing yourself to the brink, until it’s a few days before the games and you realize, Sting wasn’t lying.

You’d been trying to ignore it, ignore the urge, but eventually you give in and find yourself in the city of Magnolia. A place you haven’t been in a long time.

Fairy Tail’s location had changed, but you’d made sure to keep tabs on them. You never showed your face, mainly because you knew that in the end, you’d betrayed your friends. In their eyes, you assumed, you were the enemy, a traitor. You’d left them, left your guild in a time they’d needed you most, and almost instantly regretted it.

But every time you tried to go back, every time you made your way towards those doors, you’d remember the words you’d said -- “They’re not coming back. They’re never coming back.” -- and, like a coward, you were never able to face them.

From the moment you’d left, all you’d wanted to do was go back but it was too late for that now. And so you settled for keeping tabs, helping them where you could, always in secret -- you knew how they owed money, and you didn’t have a lot, but you always anonymously send some the guild’s way in hopes of helping. Sabertooth would kill you if they found out, specifically Sting, but it was your way of repaying all the hurt you must’ve caused them.

It’s why you know their new location. And, without even being there for more then five minutes, you see them.

A blue flying cat, followed by a white one, a tuff of pink hair, red hair, blue hair, blonde and most importantly, him. His dark hair, the fact that nothing’s changed and he looks exactly like he had those seven years ago when you’d wished him good luck on the S Class competition, and pressed a shy, chaste kiss to his cheek, the two of you blushing madly as he left, waving you goodbye.

But, they were there. He was there.

-

“And last but certainly not least, is the team that came first in the preliminaries... that’s right, you know them, you love them! Now, get on your feet and scream for the most powerful guild in all Fiore! The one and only, Sabertooth!”

You wince at the cheering, two steps behind everyone else as Sting makes his grand entrance, looking thoroughly most pleased and proud of himself then anyone else. However, even you can see the smirk on Rufus’ and Orga’s face. 

If anything, it’s you and Rogue that don’t look all that excited.

And you, for a specific reason. One that stares you right in the face the second you walk into the arena.

Elfman, Erza, Lucy, Natsu, but more importantly, Gray all look at you the second your team arrives. You can even feel Fairy Tail team B, and the rest of the guild up in the stands watching you and only you. You also notice with disdain that Sting had purposefully made way for you to be seen, even if you hadn’t been that hidden, you would’ve rather remained in the shadows.

That, and you’re not exactly sure what to say as they all stare at you.

“Y/N?!”

It’s Natsu who yells it, but it’s Lucy who steps towards you, baffled and confused; “Y/N, what’re you...”

But you only lower your gaze, eyes falling shut as Sting pulls you into his side, laughing loudly. “What a reunion!” He cheers, pumping his fist in the air, before turning to you. “Isn’t it so great to see all your old guildmates, Y/N?”

You meet their eyes, just as the announcer calls out;

“What’s this? A reunion? Could it be perhaps that Sabertooth’s own Y/N Y/L/N was once a member of Fairy Tail? What a twist on her debut in the Grand Magic Games!”

“This is so not man...”

Turning your head at the sound of Elfman’s voice, your breath catches in the back of your throat.

“Elfman,” Erza says sharply, pulling your eyes back on her and thus the rest of them, noticing with a thick swallow the way her eyes have never left your own. “I’m sure Y/N has her reasons.”

But as she stares at you, waiting for you to say something, you simply turn, walking off.

“I didn’t know you used to be in Fairy Tail,” Rufus drawls to you when you pass him, and your shoulders tighten.

That’s right... now, everyone knew.

“You never needed to know,” you say simply.

“Y/N.”

“It seems Fairy Tail’s Team A Gray Fullbuster approaches Sabertooth’s own Y/N Y/L/N, and the crowd watches in anticipation at the clear tension amongst the two of them--.”

Everything freezes. Shoulders tensing, you slowly turn, meeting Gray’s eyes -- the one you’d been specifically avoiding.

“We won’t lose.”

I know, you want to say. I don’t want you to, you want to tell him. I want Fairy Tail to win, you want to plead. But instead, knowing the eyes that watch you, you simply say; “neither will Sabertooth.”

-

This had to be some cruel joke.

Your punishment, maybe.

Sabertooth’s Y/N Y/L/N versus Fairy Tail’s Team A Gray Fullbuster

That’s what the board said, that what that God awful announcer calls with clear joy in his voice -- your first battle, the second day of the Games, and this way the turn out.

There was no way you’d win. 

Ignoring the fact that you had no doubt Gray was stronger then you -- you simply just couldn’t. You wouldn’t. Not against Fairy Tail and certainly not against Gray.

“Good luck, Y/N,” Sting calls as you move to make your way towards the arena. “Though I doubt you’ll need it.”

You hate his words, hate the way he knows, hate the way he seems to get such joy out of everything that had happened. This was his fault. His fucking fault that you were here, and that this was happening.

Though, of course, even you knew that was true.

“Sabertooth’s Y/N Y/L/N has never been apart of Sabertooth’s team, but we can expect something great from Fiore’s strongest guild, needless to say. Do you know anything about Y/N Y/L/N, Yajima-san?”

“I don’t know much about Y/’N now, but in her Fairy Tail days, she never really made a name for herself, but I do distinctly remember her powers being incredibly unique.”

“Ah! A mystery then. And of course, Fairy Tail’s Gray Fullbuster is a Ice Wizard, but after his performance in day one’s Hidden Competition, the crowd’s not too sure what to expect. Nonetheless, it should be an intense match between old guildmates now turned enemy’s.”

“Shut up,” you hiss to yourself, nails digging into the palm of your hands.

“Ah, I see you’re just as chipper as you used to be.”

Swallowing thickly, you inhale sharply as Gray comes to a stop a few feet before you. It’s closest you’ve been to him since that first day, and more importantly, then in seven years. You’d already known since that day, but he really does look exactly like he had that day. Hasn’t aged a day. You don’t know the story, you don’t know how he’s back, but you know you’ve heard the term ‘seven year blank’ echoing around.

That makes more sense as you stare at him now.

Still eighteen, you’re now older then him then a year younger like you had been before. 

Remaining silent, your head tilts back, where you know Sabertooth is, chest tightening.

“Y/N.”

Turning to Gray at the sound of your name, your lips part when you noticed the way his eyes have softened, even if only a little, like he caught something in the past moment you’d turned away from him. He looks so much more... concerned then he had the first day, and that was only yesterday. When he’d called for you, he’d looked so angry...

Now, he only looked worried.

“What happened?”

Swallowing thickly, you try to appear unbothered. “I left.”

“There’s more to it, I know there is,” Gray shakes his head, “the others told us about the day--”

Eyes clenching shut, a simply jerk of your head has Gray flying back. It causes a roar of gasps, surprise and anticipation in the thought that the fight is finally starting. But you know, unlike them, that it won’t get farther then that -- at least not from your end.

Gray hisses, slowly crawling to his feet, before he smirks at you; “you’ve gotten strong.”

“It’s been seven years.”

“Still,” he shrugs, stopping before you once again. “You have control now.”

You shrug, mimicking him with a smirk, “it’s been seven years.”

However, the facade falls all too quick when he takes a step towards you. Your body tenses, fists clenching as he continues to make his way towards you until he’s directly before you. He eyes you for a moment, quiet, carefully, and you nearly break then and there.

“It may have been seven years, but I know you best,” he whispers, voice low, “I know you’re lying.”

You shake your head, pushing his words away from your thoughts; “attack me.”

And he blinks, surprised; “what?”

“I need you to attack me,” you repeat, keeping your eyes trained downwards, refusing to meet his eyes. “I... I just need you to.”

And part of you expects him to -- you deserve it, you know, after all you’d done.

But, a second later, Gray’s stepping back, pulling your wide eyes on him as he shakes his head; “Fairy Tail doesn’t attack their own friends, Y/N. You know that.” And your breath hitches when his hand moves to raise.

“No!” You yell, before you can help yourself, eyes flashing a bright gold, like they had seconds before, holding Gray’s arm in place as he blinks back at you. Letting out a soft whimper, one you hope he doesn’t hear, you hold his arm in place, eyes falling shut as your own arm raises, the crowd falling eerily silent.

“I give up.”

And you knew, even as you feel the glares on your back, that there really wasn’t any other outcome that could’ve happened. You’d never hurt Gray, you knew, and you refused to hurt Fairy Tail anymore.

You were destined to lose this match.

-

“What’s so special about those fairies, huh?”

Wincing, you gasp at the squeeze on your throat, trying to suck in air that won’t come as your eyes fall on Sting’s own narrowed ones, glaring down at you. The brick of the wall behind you bites into your skin, and you know his grip will leave bruises, but even as you gasp for air and it feels like your vision is closing in on you, you have no regrets.

You never would, even if it’ll get you killed.

“What’s so fucking special about them?”

You refuse to respond, even if Sting wasn’t blocking off your air way you wouldn’t. Even if you could easily knock him away, send him flying, you don’t -- you’ll only pay for it more later.

“What’s so special about him?!”

He drops you then, and you fall to your knees with a thud, a cry leaving your lips as he sends a sharp kick to your gut, causing you to double over. It takes you a moment, a solid minute to catch your breath, and even then you’re still gasping, voice raspy as you raise your chin, eyes narrowing as you say the words you’ve been wanting to say to Sting for years.

“Fairy Tail is the guild Sabertooth could never be,” you hiss, your voice pathetic but your gaze menacing. “And Gray is a better man than you’ll ever be. All of them are. You’ll never be as good as Natsu.” You hit him where you know it hurts, the words having been on the tip of your tongue for years but you’d always held back in fear of what would happen.

Well, you’re no longer afraid. You’re too far gone now.

Sting’s eyes narrow and his face twists, ready to explode, before he breathes, and a smirk curls onto his lips. “You’ll never be apart of your pathetic guild again,” he hisses, “you’ll be stuck in Sabertooth for the rest of your life. Only, Master will make sure your life is a living hell.”

He sends another sharp kick at your side, but says nothing more as he turns, walking off with a huff.

It takes you a moment to gather yourself, slowly pushing yourself up to your knees where you stay, chest heaving, the pain radiating across your entire body, fingers finding your neck and touching the offended skin gently as you hiss in response.

You didn’t regret surrendering, but you couldn’t help but be terrified of what would happen when you walked into the inn that night.

You never should’ve left Fairy Tail. It was a regret you’d probably take to your grave.

“We actually have points thanks to you.”

Blinking at the sound of Gray’s voice, you slowly glance up at him, arm still wrapped tightly around your stomach as you stare up at him.

“I’m glad,” you whisper, smiling gently, “Fairy Tail deserves to win.”

Gray sighs, and stepping towards you, he reaches a hand out; “here,” he says softly, voice a mere whisper. You meet his eyes, before glancing at his hand for a moment, slowly slipping your own in it. He helps you to your feet, holding you up as you waver, hissing in pain, and then, before you know it, before you can even help yourself, you fall against him, forehead pressing against his shoulder as you let out a whimper.

“You know,” Gray says after a moment, “I still remember that kiss.”

Shaking your head, you let out a quiet, somewhat forced laugh.

“What happened, Y/N?”

“You were gone,” you whisper, finally answering. “You all were, but you were too. And... And I couldn’t handle staring at those doors everyday waiting for you to walk through them, only for you never to.” Pulling back, you meet his eyes, “I love you, I wanted to tell you that day, and it crushed me that I never did.”

Hands falling on your waist, Gray shakes his head; “no one would tell me where you were when we came back. It’s like every time I asked, this look would come over them and everyone would fall silent. When I learned it had been seven years, I wanted to see you first and tell you... tell you, I love you too.”

Biting your lip, “it’s too late,” you whisper. “The others must hate me and I... Sting will never let me leave.”

Gray’s grip tightens. “They don’t hate you, Y/N. Everyone misses you. I miss you,” and then, he shifts, cupping your cheek to pull your eyes on his own again. “I need you to come back.”

“But... Sting--”

“We’ll figure it out, Master will figure it out,” Gray argues, shaking his head. “The Guild needs you. I need you.”

Lips parting, you try to find the words, only to realize there are none. So, instead, you simply fall into his arms, holding him tight against you and hold on to his promise.

[leviiattacks]

ceo levi falling in love?

author note :: THIS WAS SM FUN TO WRITE?? levi in the modern world is just always enjoyable for me. anyways it’s just lots of shy ceo levi and secretary reader :-) as always requests are open feel free to stop by !! :D word count :: some how i got to 2.4k,,,, i promise it was an accident it doesn’t feel that long 

levi falls in love slowly. he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it until he looks at you one day during a company meeting and is unable to understand why he can’t take his eyes off you

usually he’s able to shift his focus away but he’s stuck in place despite his efforts to look away

the entire meeting is him occasionally humming his approval at all the proposals and prospective business plans being presented to him

when, truly he is NOT listening at all. he’s trying to figure out when the hell and why the hell he began to feel this way for you.

it gets to a point where he’s so distracted over it he ends the team meeting early

everyone in the room exchanges worried glances between each other.

mr ackerman, letting them leave early? that’s a first but HEY!! they’ll take it!!

as everyone disperses out of the room he’s sitting with his back hunched in his plush office chair when he then comes to the realization that he has no idea when he did fall for you,,,,, it just sorta happened????

well, you are basically around him 24/7 and help him with everything but, his newfound feelings still catch him by surprise

at first he’s scared. the feeling is odd and the way his chest tightens as he speaks to you doesn’t feel right at all.

“any specific type of tea for today?” you ask waiting for his response

the rope squeezes at his heart and he squirms around a little.

“u-um, the usual is just fine”

WHY DID HE TRIP OVER HIS WORDS...??

WHY...????

but AGAIN he ignores it, he knows it’s for the best if he doesn’t get emotionally involved with you.

for the record, levi’s definition of emotionally involved is dating you, he doesn’t know that despite not dating you he is very much still emotionally involved with you

he’s pretty good at hiding his feelings though and the fact he likes you goes unnoticed by literally everyone

well, it does stay that way for a little while

that is until someone else expresses interest in you.

it’s a normal friday evening but for some unknown reason he can’t stop himself from clenching his jaw when he walks past you and overhears jean the new head of marketing ask if you’re single

levi is stood behind you and turns to hand his chilling stare to jean who slowly notices. he looks like his knees are about to buckle. “?,&:£:& sorry for asking,,, i’ll...... get going......”

levi just grunts in annoyance glaring at him even as he scurries out the hallway.

you turn to look at him and happily smile “ahhh thank you, i didn’t know how to turn him down he just joined the team so you know, it was weird he asked that”

levi just nods and tells you to get back to work and he hears you squeak out a “yepyepyep!!!”

levi is also very in denial about the way he feels

one day it’ll be “yeah i like y/n” the next it’s “no i do not...that is literally SO stupid. me??? in love?? never.”

also, when you accidentally brush past his skin he can’t help but tense up slightly and look anywhere but where you’re touching him

one time you place a hand on his forehead to check on his temperature because you do not trust him to be honest about having a fever

the scent of your vanilla perfume it’s sweet and simple but it makes him feel incredibly shy for no reason at all

GOD.

he feels like a stupid flustered school boy

ALL THIS OVER SOME PERFUME??

the man can’t even handle looking you in the eye. he’s reading his paperwork acting as nonchalant as possible when he’s really just freaking out

is my forehead sweaty?

fuck, fuck, fuck how do i look up close?

his thoughts are so jumbled up he doesn’t know how to respond to you when you ask if he’s really doing okay

“your cheeks are bright red, maybe you do have a fever?” you’re frowning and rummaging through your bag hoping to find something to help his pounding headache

but all he’s doing as he sits at his desk is nervously opening and closing his pen by the lid

he can’t tell if his face is red because he’s ill or because he likes you

and it’s driving him CRAZY??

wait a second.

does he like you? or does he like-like you?? or does he lo- no he does not love you that is absurd

what really cements his feelings for you is the day he’s unable to reel his mouth back in.

he just starts rambling about everything that has been stressing him out recently

the new company merger, developing new product designs, reviewing humongous stacks of paperwork, attending all these long meetings

he is being driven to his breaking point and you stand there taking it all in

“hey, take the day off.” your soft voice cuts him off mid sentence and he looks at you like you just told him to curl up into a ball and die

take a day off???? he does not have the time to take a day off??

he assumes you’re frustrated by his behaviour and begins to apologize. “i’m sorry that was unprofessional i shouldn’t have don-”

“i’ll finish the paperwork. your next meeting is scheduled for tomorrow. it’s okay to take a breather.” you pick up the stack of documents and move to transfer them over to your desk

but levi is persistent.

he stands in your way and you look at him expecting him to step out

“there is no need for that.” his tone is firm but you’re still defiant

“it’s my job as your secretary to alleviate your workload.” you don’t even spare him a glance and he feels like he’s burdening you now

sure, you are his secretary but allowing you to complete all that work on your own is ludicrous

waltzing around him you beeline towards your desk but again he steps in your way interjecting your path

“lev-”

your face morphs into a mortified expression and you panic, you did not just call him by his first name AT WORK

“i mean,” [insert an anxious yet deliberate cough] “mr ackerman.”

“listen, i understand you’re very stressed sir but i’ll finish the work off so please rest up. you need to be refreshed for tomorrow’s company dinner with the investors.”

you’re pleading he takes your advice but all he can do is blink in confusion

you would do that for him???

are you really just diligent and caring or,,, does he maybe have a chance at asking you out?

but again as quick as the idea enters his head it leaves.

asking you out sounds absurd to him, you deserve way better than someone like him

levi is having another one of his jealous moments

you’ve latched yourself onto reiner braun’s arm at the company dinner and he turns away frustrated

you look really pretty

like,,, sUPER pretty

like,,, drop dead gorgeous

he clears his throat when you both make eye contact

you perk up a little and your hand raises to wave at him but levi is so horrible at interacting with you he ends up ignoring you completely...

the pit of fire in his stomach flares up when he hears reiner compliment you, he’s surprised you even accept it and thank him

now, levi is not annoyed because you don’t deserve the compliment.

no, no, no you deserve all the compliments under the sun as far as he’s concerned but what the hell does “you look way better than normal.” even mean??

he thinks you look pretty every day so he’s just a tad bit offended by it

and he only begins to realize he’s in too deep when he sees the way reiner is getting a little too handsy for his liking

he doesn’t interrupt by saying anything even though he really wants to, you seem to not mind reiner’s touch

so he won’t step in between that, it’s not even any of his business

but it certainly doesn’t stop his displeasure from being blatantly obvious and displayed on his face

“ahhh mr ackerman, if it isn’t a pleasure to see you?”

levi hears an investor greet him but his eyes are glued on you.

you’re laughing so hard at one of braun’s jokes and he feels the same flame in his stomach.

it’s rising and reaches his chest igniting once again and he narrows his eyes finally looking away

he’s not going to spare you another glance this entire evening instead he’ll occupy himself with business talk

“mr acker-”

spinning on his heel he twists around and is face to face to with one of his close sponsors erwin smith

he smiles and the two shake hands discussing new company developments and shared work stress before some how shifting to each other's personal lives

“seeing anyone?” erwin’s question makes levi stiffen and his eyes flick towards where you were just standing a while ago

you’re no longer there but he spots you a little further away now sitting alone

you look a little lost and he feels a sudden and strong magnetism

he wants to approach you to talk so badly, and as his eyes scan around the room he sees reiner occupying himself in a suggestive conversation with a lady from HR

she’s definitely trying to flirt and he’s reciprocating easily

oh, so you’ve been ditched...?

is reiner OK???

first the backhanded compliment

now he’s ditching YOU???

it makes levi feel a little angry and frustrated

he doesn’t even notice at first because he’s so deep in thought but erwin leans in to whisper in his ear. “i know that look, go talk to your crush.”

“we’re much too old for you to be using the term crush. it makes it sound childish.” levi grumbles before taking a sip from his wine glass

“i’ll go keep my secretary company. i’ve spoke to most of the other investors it should be okay.” the statement is more of a question but smith nods in response

“it’ll be more than okay, go get em’ tiger!” erwin lands a light punch onto levi’s shoulder and he grins before walking away

to levi’s disappointment he’s unable to speak to you

you end up getting dragged into conversation with some of the other employees and he doesn’t see you again

so much for talking to you, he couldn’t even get within a meters radius

he’s now out on the balcony for a breathe of fresh air, the past few hours have consisted of tedious and forced small talk with an investor’s daughter

her father has been BEGGING levi, even bribing him to consider marrying her but levi rejects every single time

there’s nothing wrong with the girl really

she’s well educated and quite pretty but... that’s all he knows about her?

AND no one beats you, even though he’s still kinda in denial about liking you

hell, not like that part matters he doesn’t even know the girl’s name what does her dad expect from him?

was it sharron? shana? he forgot her name as soon as it was said 

much to levi’s dismay he hears an unexpected giggle behind him and then an arm slinks over his shoulder, the investor’s daughter has followed him out and is now pressing her chest against him awaiting a reaction

frankly, he wants to push her off BUT he’ll be in big trouble and lose a key sponsor if he handles this incorrectly

“could you please distance yourself?” he tries to intimidate the younger girl away with the bitter tone of his voice but it only seems to motivate her

“feisty one aren’t you?” she’s looking up at him through her lashes and her poor attempt at looking appealing only makes levi internally face palm

her index finger is drawing circles into his tie and he feels his breath hitch due to how uncomfortable she’s making him

“please move.” he requests for her to listen once again and he’s now taken a step back but she only follows and keeps her firm grip on his tie

she doesn’t seem to be letting up and there’s nothing he can really do about it.

he guesses he’ll just wait till she gets bored but the time passes at an excruciatingly slow rate

in this fifteen minute duration she’s played around with his hair which has SERIOUSLY annoyed him because he took time to style it

and he thought it looked pretty cool

now she’s only pushed and pushed further and further into his chest and he can feel her hot icky breath hit his neck

the veins in his forehead are twitching in expanding irritation and he doesn’t know how much more of this he can tolerate

“you’re making him uncomfortable.” levi’s head snaps to the right and there you are still as beautiful as the last time he saw you

your arms crossed over your chest and you’re looking the girl up and down

“and who might you be?” the way she scoffs seems to be enough to piss you off because your face morphs into a scowl.

big Yikes...you’re mad

“leave him alone.”

“you must be of no importance, we have no time for-”

“step away before i make a report on the grounds of sexual harassment.”

you flip your phone out smirk plastered across your face

“it’s all been recorded. know your place.” you’re unyielding and even levi is thinking??? wow??? you know how to not be nice??? because well, he’s never seen you this mad 

just as you expect she barges out in a fury (not before flicking you off), you’ve left her brimming with rage and you feel rather proud of yourself

you release a content sigh

“do i get a raise for saving you or what?” you dryly jab 

he’s always loved your straightforward jokes, they align perfectly with his blunt humour

he murmurs his appreciative thanks

“are you enjoying yourself?” he asks the question eager to know what your answer is

it’s another way he knows he’s falling way too deep for his liking

he never asks anyone else these trivial questions

“enjoyable. although reiner is a little.” you pause to find the correct words

“he just made me a little uncomfy, he’s very extroverted so i felt out of place. thankfully he’s preoccupied himself elsewhere.” the same lonely look from before returns to your face 

yeah, it is kinda sucky to have your date ditch you

“you don’t have to tolerate-” levi starts then stops.

you’ve leant in to hear him after saying you can’t hear much over the hustle and bustle from inside

“the- i mean- what i’m trying to say is” he looks at you completely stunned trying to piece together what he wants to say

wOWIE!!!! you literally look so stunning up close he can not formulate a sentence, he has officially LOST IT

the words he say next fly out of his mouth after a lengthy internal struggle “fuck. what i’m saying is, what i mean is, you could always come as my date next time.”

now you’re the one looking at him stupefied.

again, he’s looking anywhere but at you

the closest he gets to it is taking a glimpse of your dress,

it’s black and suits you well with the little ruffles and all.

“i’d love that.”

the tips of his ears grow red in embarrassment but... YOU ACCEPTED???

NOW. levi is giddy on the inside but makes no move to make it obvious instead he opts to scratch his neck and give you an awkward thumbs up

you take note of his body language and the possible realization dawns on you

but you can’t really tell if it’s the doing of alcohol

either way you grab onto his suit and begin to lead the way back into the main hall

“may as well start being my date now? not like reiner’s coming back any time soon” he can’t see your face but he can tell you’re smiling as you speak

levi’s cheeks are bright red but he thanks the chilly night air and darkness for hiding the way he’s reacting

he won’t confess just yet, it’s too early and again he’s in major denial but when staring at the hand that holds onto his suit jacket his heart tingles a little

more like a LOT...

but really whatever it is the two of you have got going on right now it weirdly makes the both of you feel weak at the knees

to be honest, levi enjoys it

and so do you :-)

[ivyglow]

Mine | Anthony Beauvillier

A/n: this idea came after we had a very sexy- I mean- Angry* Anthony pushing Sidney Crosby. Barbie and some anons send the good energy and so althought it took me forever here it is *cheers*. A huge thank you for @barbienoturbby​ for sending me some specific ideas (sharpies, choking etc hehehe), putting up w my random messages in the middle of the night or being a insecure bitch, ILY BARBIE! Huge shout out to @sebs-aston​ for proofreading this so fast *you’re amazing, liv!*.  PS. More than ever I’m gonna need your feedback because I’m an insecure bitch and this is my first time writing smut (freddie was thigh riding, I don’t consider it too much). So please just lmk if you like it or hate it <3 

Word count: 4k

Warnings: smut, mention of chocke, spitting, oral -female receiving- and all those dirty stuff. 

Summary: after getting angry on the ice, you decide to make Anthony angry in bed too. 

You knew Tito was a dom in bed as soon as you met him: he helped you to sit and to get up on your first date, and he led you to your car with his hand on your lower back. One month into getting to know each other, you were planning a gathering with his friends and he was the one to assign everyone with a task. Some days he would use fewer words and stick with hand gestures or eye contact to tell you what he wanted or what he was silently saying. 

So when you two had sex for the first time and he was on top, you were not surprised, you also weren’t surprised when he asked how would you feel about hair pulling, choking, and tying. And, well, you’d never tried any of this, so you were honest with him, knowing that honesty was the key to make things work. He promised to go slow, and he watched you intently while he did everything just to make sure you were comfortable. You can still remember how it felt when he first stretched you, how your heel went to his back to accommodate his waist better, how this movement gave him the perfect angle to go all the way until the end. 

You also remember the hickeys he left on your skin, mostly on places where your clothes could hide, but some you knew he purposely made for people to see. And people saw, indeed and also heard. He got a noise complaint twice because his old bed would scratch and bang on the wall, and that wouldn’t be a huge problem if it was anyone else, but it was Anthony, a hockey player, at that point -your boyfriend-, and he had the stamina to go for hours. A chug of water, maybe a fruit snack, and less than twenty minutes later he was ready to go again - or he would use these twenty minutes to get you off with his mouth and fingers. So the noise complaint was very much expected. 

Now six months into the relationship, this wasn’t a problem anymore. Tito bought a new bed, and even talked with a friend about the possibility of getting soundproof walls. That’s why you were drinking your water and eating one of his energy bars while watching the game. The dynamic after games was usually very sexual, it didn’t matter if he was on the road or at home, you would find a way to get off, either phone sex or spicy pics. He never left you to your own hands. 

The Isles were playing against the Penguins and you knew he was pissed off because of their losing streak against that team. That made him angry with some specifics players too. When he got home last night, you just cuddled together and went to sleep, he was tired and fuming because of their loss, and he probably heard a handful by his coach. Because of those losses, you knew he was going to skate his way around the ice tonight more than ever, and, especially, that he was angry. 

You were laying on his couch when the game started, the Isles skating around the ice in a way you would have bet was a premonition for another loss, but ten minutes in things started to go differently, and that was the exact moment when you sat and gripped Beau’s shirt before an amazing shot hit the Pens’ net. They kept the rhythm on for the next two periods, although they were pretty much stressful- a handful of times you caught yourself holding your breath or cursing. The last two were also a stage for your boyfriend’s anger. He was pissed in a way you’d never seen before on the ice, and when Sidney Crosby pushed Pulock, Tito had had enough and shoved the opposition’s player on the ice. Torn between finding it hot or funny, you chose the latter letting out a loud laugh. Yet, when another exchange of pushes happened between the Pens’ superstar and Beau you sure felt the heat taking up space inside your body and you shifted on the couch. There was another goal and the game kept on providing stress and anxiety for the fans, but you were stuck on the scene your boyfriend had just put up. 

He was usually like this in bed, but not that much on the ice, and seeing that happening outside the four walls left you with a lingering warmth inside your body, and not the cute warmth you usually felt when he cooked for you or told you how much he loved you. But the warmth you got whenever he bent you on the kitchen counter or held your hand tight while going down on you. 

It was past midnight when you heard the door open and close, the soft click making your heart beat faster. He was home. You heard the thud of his bag on the floor and his steps bringing his scent closer to the living room where you were sitting on the couch wearing only his jersey and his favorite lace.

“Hey you, winner,” your voice echoed in the dimly lit apartment and you could see his lips curling in a small smile.

“Hey, babe,” his lips found yours on a quick peck and you looked up for more contact, but Anthony was already walking to the kitchen. 

“Are you ok?” you asked, barefoot padding the floor until you reached the stool.

Your boyfriend was already busy cutting some bananas in a bowl, “Yeah, just a little stressed with the game and hungry,” he answered.

“But you won,” you stated in confusion. 

His eyes scanned you for a second before going back to his task. The silence was everything you needed to know: he really was not in the mood for long talks after the episode, but you were a woman on a mission and you knew exactly what to do to get Anthony riddled up. 

“You guys had a great game…” you began, cautious with your words and actions, hands reaching for a banana on the fruit bowl. “How was playing against Sidney Crosby?”

You saw how his eyebrows raised slightly before pouring honey on his bowl and whipping his fingers with his tongue. You knew the action wasn’t supposed to be filthy, yet you’ve been dating him long enough to know that he knew every action of his could be seen as sexual at some point. 

“It was normal, he’s a normal hockey player like any of us,” his tone is nonchalant. 

You suppress a grin, “he’s not like any of you, he’s Sidney Crosby. Just last night he reached his thousandth game,” Tito’s now chewing on his fruit and you can see how the motion seems tighter after your words, still you keep going, “he’s like a superstar! I would love to meet him any of these days…” you trail off busying yourself on biting the banana you just peeled off. His eyes trained on how your lips wrap around the piece of fruit, your tongue purposely darting out. Your boyfriend chooses silence again and you huff rolling your eyes. 

“Did you just roll your eyes at me?” he queries, eyes on his bowl, jaw still clenched tight while biting another piece of his fruit. You dart your eyes in another direction while biting your banana again, this time without so much care on giving him a hard time. “I asked you a question, y/n,” his tone was sharp and his voice low. You shake your head. 

He grabs his water bottle before chugging half of the content, “Cat got your tongue? I swear I just saw you poking it out while eating that banana to provoke me,” he tauntingly  gives you a defiant look. 

Anthony motions for you to come to him and you follow his orders willingly, eager to finally have your way with him. You’re within arm’s reach when he tugs you closer, making you stumble in the middle of his big thighs. In a blink of an eye, you feel the sting on your butt cheeks, his big hands finding it again one more time before grabbing your chin. “You can’t even wait for your man to eat,” it’s a low grunt and he seems more annoyed with your playful smile, and you see the perfect opportunity to tease him a little bit more, “You could eat something else, there’s nothing stopping you…” 

With that Anthony seems to lose his judgment before swinging your body on top of the counter, “you’re being such a brat tonight” his hands grab your butt squeezing it hard, “that’s not how you get the things you want” 

“No? Then why are you about to fuck me?” you mock him knowing damn right that this would only make him go harder on you. 

“Crisse,” (holy shit) his French accent makes your pussy throb. You loved when he talked in French to you.

His big hand pushes you back in a swift motion, the same hand spreads your legs for him, and it’s only a second before you’re fully laying on the counter. Still wearing only a lace thong and his jersey, you know the former is about to be ripped out of you. Anthony drags his fingers from the bottom of your belly to your breasts before gifting you a devilish smirk as soon as he notices you’re not wearing a bra. 

“You think Sidney Crosby is the superstar, but you know damn well I’m gonna be the reason why you’re seeing stars tonight,” he whispers before sitting on the stool and kissing up to your thighs. His lips are sticky from the honey and because they’re cold it sends chills running through your warm body. You stretch your arms to reach his hair and he hums grabbing your wrists harshly, “no hair pulling for you tonight,” his murmurs hit your skin and you let out a small whine. 

In order to play with your sensations, you see him taking a long gulp of his cold water. You know it will make his mouth colder and slicker, and you know he’s only doing it because he’s planning to spend a long time between your legs.

And that he does.

You sigh when his lips finally reach your pussy, the shock it causes is good and you can’t help but close your thighs in an attempt to bring him where you are really yearning for his lips. Nevertheless, that’s not what he has planned for you, and he drags his mouth between your pussy lips long before finally wrapping his lips on your clit and humming in pleasure. 

“Oh fuck,” you let out a whine when his fingers reach for your nipple and twist it hard. His wet tongue flickered on your clit and he dived in deeper, making you feel all of him, from his stubble that was starting to grow to his full lips, you could feel it all.

“Anthony,” you try to form a sentence in the exact moment he pushs one finger inside of you, but your voice comes out as a prayer. A plea for more. 

You were a sinner for him.

“You taste so good,” it’s a pleasure mumble and it comes just before his palm strikes your butt cheeks in a firm slap. “I could spend days here, bébé” 

“Anthony,” you try again and this time he laughs with his lips still wrapped around your clit. The vibrations send shivers through your whole body, your toes curl and you try to reach for his hair again before his hand holds both of your wrists. 

You’re close and he knows it because he adds another finger and curls it. It’s a ‘come here’ motion and from another dimension, you were almost able to hear him whisper the same words in French. 

“Give it to me,” he demands, and you do as said just as another finger hits your right spot. For some seconds the kitchen’s ceiling turns black with dots and your vision goes blurry. Toes curling, the pitch on your belly button finally making its way out just like the curses and moans that leave your mouth. Most of them being his name and how good he makes you feel. 

You’re not even done with your high when his big hands grab your ankles bringing your body to the edge of the counter and making you sit. “Open your mouth,” he demands. 

You moan, eyes rolling back from pleasure, “put your tongue out for me, má chérie,” his hands, now holding your jaw, tighten around you. There’s a whimper of bliss and you part your lips wide bringing your tongue out just like demanded before he spits on your mouth. 

“See how good you taste?!” Anthony hums and you swallow it before poking your tongue out again and licking from his glistering chin to his lips. The action fuels a passionate kiss and it’s seconds before your weak legs wrap themselves around his waist bringing him closer. Your core finds the bulge on his pants and you whimper feeling aroused again. 

Your boyfriend is fast to grasp the underside of your thighs bringing your body close to his before making his way towards the bedroom. You take your time licking and kissing his neck and jaw until your body hits the mattress and he’s unbuckling his belt.

“Take it off” he commands, unbuttoning his dress shirt. You’re fast to obey taking off the jersey you’re wearing, now you’re fully naked in front of him. 

“Hands,” you put both of your wrists together and he fastens his belt around it tight. 

From the way his eyebrows were slightly up to his lips parted, you knew he was about to give you another orgasm, you knew that he wasn’t done and he wouldn’t be any time soon. 

“Do we have a safe word tonight, bébé?” his full lips find your jaw and neck and he nibbles on your ear before sucking harshly on your neck again. 

His purpose is to mark you, not only where people can see, but also where they can’t. Just like your waist is being held with such fierceness, you know it’ll leave prints there. You hum a yes dropping your head to the side so he can have more access to your skin, “use your words, you know I need to hear you say it,” he whispers now bringing his mouth to your nipples and biting it lightly. You whimper, “our safe word is blue.” 

“Perfect,” you can feel his smile on your skin and when you reach for his hair with your hands tied, he pushes them up. His strong arm swings on top of your belly and he takes his time on your breasts before making his way lower. There’s a pitch bubbling on your belly again just with the idea of it and he gives you mischievous grim kissing and licking your thighs. 

“Beau,” you whine already feeling your legs weakening again.

“I told you I was hungry, you were the one who suggested the meal,” the funny remark is accompanied by a flicker of his tongue on your cunt. “Now I’ll only stop when I’m satisfied.” 

You curse closing your hands and trying to bring your waist up. He shakes his head, “huh huh, that’s a bad girl attitude,” he spits on your pussy and you moan loud, “and you know exactly what we do to bad girls in this house, don’t you?” 

You nod and he chuckles.

“Words.” 

“I know, sir.” 

“Now, there’s my good girl,” he praises finding your clit and holding it carefully between his teeth, “now give it to me just like you suggested,” he murmurs before diving on your pussy, his tongue gentle and slow, in contrast with his solid arm pinning you to the bed and his rough behavior. 

It would be a long ride and you would feel every step taken, because each one would bring you closer to the inevitable. You felt urgency though; you wanted him to fuck your brains out already. But Anthony took his time, and you knew he was being good because he let you cum in the kitchen even after you provoked him. When his point finger entered you, your eyes couldn’t focus and you knew you were closer, yet instead of giving you a release, your boyfriend took his kisses to your thighs grinning at you one more time. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he speaks under his breath, eyes trained on your pussy. Yet you don’t feel ashamed, because it’s Anthony, and he knows you like the back of his hands, he knows what to do to make you comfortable and he knows how to make you feel good. He would praise and love your body rightly, so you let him. You spread your legs wider and gave him a lopsided smile. 

“Please,” you plead again that night; however, he follows your request this time. 

Anthony dives in again, licking and spitting, flickering his tongue and using his fingers. Giving you what he got and what he knows you like. Your body is fast to answer, your waist trying to go higher to find his mouth, your toes curling, your head shooting back and your eyes rolling. 

He got you there. Fast.

And he made sure to ride you out of you high, this tongue not the least careful with your sensitive bud, while cleaning you up he kept licking it lightly. Full lips brushing it with dedication. 

“Now I want you on all fours,” there’s a dirty smile on his glistering lips and you hold back another moan with the image of Anthony sitting between your legs, face glowing with your cum, “allos y,” (c’mon). You turn your body, holding your hands before supporting your head on the pillows, ass up for him.

There’s the noise of a slap and the sting on your butt cheeks, right before a soft kiss is placed on top of the surely red mark. His hands roam around your body and you shiver when he grabs your hair. “Crisse, tu as l'air si chaud,” (holy shit, you look so hot) Anthony slaps you booty again and finally slips his finger at your entrance feeling your wetness pool around. You’re already ready for him again and he seems pleased with the realization. So pleased it doesn’t take long for him to slip inside of you hitting just the right spot. Your body shots upward and he holds you by your waist keeping your butt bent. 

“Anthony,” you moan loudly when he starts moving ruthlessly inside of you. There’s something hot about how his body is being aggressive and you are taking it all, how his hips are almost knocking your body down, “right - fucking - there,” you whine and he keeps going, this time grabbing your hair and making your body lean towards him. 

“Whose name are you screaming tonight, bébé?” he mumbles bending his own body on top of yours without completely letting go of the position. 

“Yours,” your answer between groans. 

“Let me hear you” 

And you do.

You say his name out loud and clear, and you’re almost sure the neighbors are going to hear it. Yet you do it again and again while the sound of your voice is mixed with the noise of his skin hitting your skin and his feral grunts. He’s big and hard inside you and every time he goes out to get inside again you can feel your pussy stretching out to accommodate him. 

“Beau,” you moan and he chuckles leaning his body down to kiss your back. You see from the corner of your eyes when he finds the black marker on the top of your drawer, you can almost see his head working on ideas, and then he’s grabbing the sharpie you were using to write on your sticky notes earlier today. 

His body is straight up again and his movements are now slower, as he unclasps the marker and you feel its cold material hit your skin. There’s a long up and then down movement, you’re almost sure it’s an M, and then there’s a harsh line of an I, you can hear his grunts louder and he stops himself for a second before shooting his body towards yours again. The sharpie finds your skin again, this time to draw an N, you knew he was doing it big, not only for his eyes, but for you to feel and to know exactly what it was as he wrote the last letter, an E. 

You roll your eyes when he closes and throws the sharpie somewhere in the room before leaving another one of his blows on your butt cheeks. Anthony swings his arm around your torso bringing you up to him, your back hitting his solid chest, “you’re mine,” and that’s what it takes for you to come undone on his still hard cock. Your whole body trembles and your vision goes blurry again, there are tears in your eyes, and this time your moans turn into screams of satisfaction. 

He keeps fucking you through your high and you curse dropping your head back on his shoulder. His hand sneaks in front of your body to touch your sensitive clit, and you hold it sinking your nails on his skin. “Oh fuck,” he grunts drawing his finger deeper. You’re not sure if your body can’t take so much pleasure.

“Let me ride you,” it’s a prayer, a plea, a cry, and you can feel his lips on your neck before your bodies are turned and you’re on top taking him deeper, touching new spots. 

“That’s it, bébé,” he praises you and you roll your hips using your last energies. His hands find their way to your thighs and his short nails dig on your skin bringing you impossibly closer. There’s a deep grunt from him and a small whine from you. It’s hard for your eyes to focus, and you use your body to pin his down and your tied hands find his neck before squeezing it. His hips shot up under you and you scream, tightening your grip on him and squeezing his dick inside of you. 

You can feel another knot on the pitch of your belly, but this time it feels different to recognize this new sensation. That’s when you notice the wetness under you dripping onto his cock to his belly button and in the bed. 

“Fuck,” he moans, “Oh shit, you’re squirting,” his big hands go to your back and he keeps shooting his hips up to meet your pussy, “that’s it, bébé, give it to me once more,” and you’re squeezing him one last time before giving both of you a mind-blowing orgasm. Your body tumbles on top of his and this time things go pitch black instead of blurry. You can still feel his hot body under you and his rapid heartbeat, but your body is fluttering and there’s nothing in front of you. There’s only his body. There’s only your boyfriend existing under you with his cock still deep inside of you. 

It’s seconds before his caresses on your back become some kind of poking, “y/n?” 

“Huh?” you mumble, your voice raspy. He chuckles.

“Fuck, you passed out,” he sounds proud and you giggle. 

“That was the best sex we’ve ever had,” you confess without finding the strength to move your hands and caress him back, but Anthony keeps the tip of his fingers moving softly around your body, “I think I should talk more about Sidney Crosby, huh?” you joke and his hips shot upward making you moan Anthony’s name. Although he just came, he’s still hard and deep inside your soaked pussy.

“What were you saying?” he questions with a smug grin. “I think you were saying something about a certain player, Sidney Crosby maybe?” 

You arch your eyebrows, “who’s Sidney Crosby? I only know Anthony Beauvillier,” and he laughs at your answer before kissing your lips softly. You know there’s gonna be a time for water and a fruit snack later and then he’s going again, because he’s never done until you’re completely wrecked, the only name able to escape your lips being his. 

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[nastybuckybarnes]

Deep End  -  Two

Pairing: Dark!Steve Rogers X Reader

Summary: He’s back. After all your best efforts at getting away, he’s found you again. And this time, he’s not letting you go so easily. He’s determined to do whatever it takes to get you to be his. Forever.

Warnings: Dark Themes, Language, Angst, Smut (DubCon,) Manipulation, Anxiety

Word Count: 3.4K

A/n: Boom part two! I wanna hear what y’all think’s gonna happen with this series

Madness Masterlist

Bad Dream Masterlist

THIS IS A DARK FIC WITH SEXUAL AND TRIGGERING CONTENT!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!! 18+ ONLY!!!

~*~

“Good morning, Darling.” Chapped lips press a kiss to your cheek, strong arms winding around your figure and a sharp chin digging into your shoulder.

“Breakfast smells delicious.” You only hum, trying to get your hands to stop shaking.

“Is it eggs?!” Sarah bounds down the stairs excitedly, running straight for your legs.

Steve intercepts her, tossing her up in the air then catching her in his arms again.

She erupts in a fit of giggles and squeals as he starts tickling her, and you find yourself biting your tongue to stop yourself from saying anything to him.

“Eggs and bacon and pancakes only for you, Princess!” He exclaims, kissing her cheek then setting her back on her feet.

“Do I still go to school?” Sarah asks, climbing up onto one of the barstools and kicking her legs.

“Yes, sweetie, you still have to go to school. We’re gonna get you back to school soon, there’s just some things that... your dad... and I need to discuss first, okay? But today, you can relax at home, eat your breakfast and explore the house if you want.” She nods her head eagerly, little hands holding her fork as you slide a plate of food over to her.

You portion some out for Steve too, grinding your teeth together in distaste.

You scoured the house for anything that could be used against him but came up completely empty-handed. Rat poison, bleach, Lysol. Nothing.

He takes his plate with a smile, his free hand gripping your waist and turning you to him slightly.

He leans down, lips pressed against yours for a brief gentle moment before pulling away and sticking his tongue out at a snickering Sarah.

He sits down beside Sarah and starts eating, his eyes boring holes into your back as you gather some food for yourself. As you’re getting ready to sit down, he stands up, unlocking a drawer by the sink and grabbing a bottle of something.

Your heart races in your chest and you hold your fork just the tiniest bit tighter, prepared to use it as a weapon if you need to.

He turns back to you with a smile, setting two small pills on your napkin, away from Sarah’s curious gaze.

“Take them with your food,” he instructs, kissing your forehead then sitting back down between you and your daughter.

"Morgan’s gonna get dropped off for a little while, Sarah. She’s around your age and I think you two will get along great. You guys can play while your mother and I talk, okay?” She bobs her head up and down, shovelling the eggs into her mouth.

“Good.”

~*~

“They’re really hitting it off,” Steve says with a smile, watching as his daughter and her new friend play in the backyard.

You hesitantly come up beside him, a small smile spreading on your lips.

“I-I’m always nervous about her making friends. She’s never really had problems with it but...” You trail off, taking a step back as he turns around to face you.

“Tony’s got Morgan enrolled in a private school, says it’s really good. I was thinking we could send Sarah there too.” You bite your bottom lip and shrug. “I-I don’t know how I feel about private schools. What are the reviews like? And are they strict? I don’t want her... all I want is for her to have a normal childhood. That’s all I want.” Steve’s face softens and he nods, taking your hand and ushering you to the living room.

“It’s all gonna be okay. I know it’s gonna take some getting used to, but it’ll all work out in the end, you’ll see.”

You take a couple of deep breaths, wanting so desperately to believe him but you know better.

“Tony says the school’s really good, and it’s not super strict. The kids still get to have fun and make friends while learning. I think we should give it a shot and if she doesn’t like it we’ll find another school for her to go to.” You nod, eyes fluttering over to the window looking over the backyard.

“Now, I think you and I need to set down some ground rules, okay?” You turn to him, your guard up in an instant.

His face is calm, but you still don’t trust him.

“Sarah’s going to be at school all day, I’ve gotta go to work, which means you’re going to be here to look after the house. My beautiful housewife.” You furrow your brows, “What am I supposed to do here all day?” He looks around with pursed lips.

“Cook and clean? Keep the house looking nice, maybe you could start a garden if you want. But soon you’ll have less time for moving around and more time for...” he trails off, his hand coming to rest on your stomach.

“You’re gonna give me another baby, gonna carry it in that beautiful body of yours. And when the baby gets here you’ll have your hands full so you may want to start planning for that now.”

You’ve got no choice in this.

“D-did you keep any of Sarah’s old baby furniture?” You ask softly, fighting back tears.

“No, I gave it to Nat and Bucky cause they were talking about adopting. But you can buy more. I’ll give you my card and that can be your task. When Sarah’s at school and you’re done with cleaning, you can start setting up the new baby’s room.” He says it like it’s the most prestigious task he could give and you should be thanking him for the opportunity.

“Now, one last thing...” He eyes you for a moment then shakes his head.

“Your old wardrobe is going to be gotten rid of. I don’t want to see you in these leggings or jeans. I’ll have Nat bring over some clothes that are more acceptable, but until then, there should be a few decent dresses still in the closet from... before.” His eyes dark the tiniest bit at the mention of how things were.

“I want you to go change, then gather up all your old clothes. Once that’s done, you can start making lunch. I’m going to run out to grab a few things for dinner, we’re having guests over tonight, so I expect you to be on your best behaviour, okay?”

You say nothing, eyes focused on the floor.

He grabs your chin roughly and forces you to look at him, his eyes blazing.

“I asked you a fucking question, dear. You’d better answer me before I get angry.”

You swallow hard then nod, “o-okay. I will.”

He nods and lets go of your face with a smile, rising to his feet and fixing the sleeves of his shirt.

“Good. I’m thinking pasta for dinner.”

~*~

You’re wearing a yellow sundress that comes just past your knees. It flows with every step you take and you’ve gotta admit that it’s quite pretty. You hate that he chose it, though.

You set the dining room table silently, mind racing. You’re so lost in your thoughts that you don’t notice you’re not alone until a hand is grabbing the bottom of your dress.

“Mommy, did you hear me?” You gasp, jumping in surprise then shaking your head.

“No, Sarah, I didn’t. Mommy was just thinking. Sorry, what did you say?” She huffs a breath.

“Daddy said that Aunty Nat is coming over for dinner! Do you think she’ll bring ice cream?” Your heart clenches and you sigh.

“I uh... I don’t know. You’ll have to go ask... your father.”

“Ask me what?” Sarah turns to him and lifts her arms, giggling happily when he scoops her up in his arms.

“When Aunty Nat comes is she gonna bring ice cream?”

“Well, I don’t know if she’ll bring ice cream, but maybe after dinner we can all go out and get an ice cream cone. How does that sound?” She claps her hands together in excitement, squealing when she hears the front door open.

“Knock knock!” A female voice calls.

You swallow hard, trying not to let your anger get the better of you as Sarah shimmies out of her father’s grip and rushes to the door.

“Aunty Nat!” The redhead picks her up and spins her around.

“Hey, pumpkin! How’s my favourite girl doing?”

You walk back to the stove, stirring the noodles and imagining how satisfying it would be to dump the boiling water on the traitorous redhead.

“How’s dinner coming along?” Steve asks, his hands finding your hips.

“Just about done. Everyone can sit down, it’ll only be a minute more.” He nods, kissing your temple and opening the fridge to grab drinks.

“Hey, pal.” You stiffen, too many memories filling you at the voice.

“Hey, Buck. Glad you could make it.” You keep your back to the brunet, not wanting to see him, to remember what happened any more than you already have to.

“Aren’t you going to greet our guests, dear?” Steve asks, one hand grabbing the waistline of your dress and tugging. You reluctantly turn around to face the brunet just as the redhead walks into the room.

“Well?” Steve asks, looking at you expectantly. You say nothing, glaring daggers at Natasha. She meets your gaze for a moment then looks away, knowing full well what she’s done.

“Dinner’s ready.” Is all you say, yanking out of Steve’s grip and turning back to the stove.

“It’s nice to see you again too, (Y/n),” Bucky says, walking past you and into the dining room.

Natasha brings Sarah after him, leaving you and Steve alone.

“You and I will need to have a long conversation once they leave,” he hisses. “If your attitude doesn’t improve, then you’re going to need to be punished for it.”

You turn and look up at him with defiant eyes.

“I’m wearing your stupid dress and I’m playing your stupid game. What more do you want from me? You’ve got me and my daughter held hostage in your goddamn dollhouse and-” He grabs you by the throat, shaking his head at you.

“Fine. I’ll fucking teach you now then.”

He shoves you aside and walks into the dining room, a smile on his face.

“She’s just gonna bring dinner out. Then she and I need to have a little chat before we join you.” You reluctantly bring the food out, if only so Sarah can eat. You’ve hardly set the steaming dishes down before Steve’s grabbing your hand and yanking you through the house and up the stairs.

Your heart races in your chest, fear coursing through your veins at what he may have planned for you.

Flashes of different ways he’s punished you run through your mind and you feel your eyes fill with tears as he shoves you onto his bed.

His chest is heaving, with anger or exertion, you can’t tell.

“S-Steve I’m sorry. P-please don’t hurt me.” He watches you for a moment then shakes his head.

“You know I can’t tolerate that kind of behaviour.” You crawl back, tears dripping down your cheeks.

“I-I’m just, please! I’m scared and tired a-and I don’t have any friends and m-my dad is-is...” You shake your head, hoping he has a shred of decency left inside of himself.

“Please!” He stares at you long and hard then sighs. “You know I love you, and I love Sarah with my entire heart. But I can’t tolerate this rude behaviour. I know it’s a big transition for you, and I’m willing to be patient, but you can’t treat our guests that way. Rudeness directed at me is different, but you have no right to treat Bucky and Natasha the way you did. That’s why you’re being punished. I’ll forgive the snappy behaviour towards me, but not them.”

You shake your head and shove your face in your hands, sobs bubbling free from your chest.

“Please don’t hurt me. I’m sorry.” He nods, turning to the dresser and pulling out a familiar box.

It’s the box he keeps his torture toys in, you realize.

“Lay down on your stomach. If you listen, your punishment won’t be nearly as severe.” You sniffle and nod, rolling over and laying down on your tummy.

He flips your dress up and yanks your panties down your legs, eyeing your ass for a moment.

“Bucky and Nat are important members of this family, and you will treat them as such, do you understand?” You nod, crying out in pain and thrashing away from him as a leather paddle comes down hard on your ass.

“Am I going to have to tie you to the bed?” You can’t answer, you’re too busy trying not to choke on your own snot.

He grabs your wrists roughly and ties them to a hoop on the headboard, successfully leaving you at his mercy.

He smacks you again, and again, then a fourth time, and you squirm away as much as you can.

“When you’re good, you don’t get punished.”

He delivers sixteen more impossibly hard hits, then tosses the paddle onto the ground and climbs onto the bed, cock raging in his pants.

His knees push your legs apart and you shake your head, tugging against your restraints desperately as he lines himself up with your entrance.

“Huh, would ya look at that?” You press your face into the mattress, humiliation filling you as he rubs his cock through your wet folds.

“Feels like somebody enjoyed that a bit more than they were letting on, huh?” You shake your head, crying out as he sheaths himself fully with only one thrust.

Your walls burn at the intrusion, body instinctively creating more moisture to lubricate the violation, but that’s not how Steve sees it.

“Fuck, your body misses me, huh? Hates it when my cock isn’t fucking you.” He grabs your hips and hoists them up, then starts a punishing pace, forcing you to take every painful inch of him.

“Fuck, feel how tight you are... squeezin’ me so nice...” Every hit of his hips against your ass makes you cry out in pain, your entire lower half on fire.

“M’gonna fill you with my cum then lock it in. You’re gonna give me another fucking baby. Gonna grow nice and big.” He picks up the pace, eyebrows furrowed and face screwed up with pleasure.

His hips still, warmth exploding within you as he reaches his climax.

He stays inside you for a long while, catching his breath while his cock softens, then he slowly pulls out.

“You know,” he begins, rooting around in the box for something, “it’s much more effective if you orgasm too. Really sucks it all up in you and improves the chances of fertilization.” A switch flips and then there’s a constant buzzing noise filling your ears.

Right as you realize what it is, he’s got the vibrator pressed against your clit.

You jolt away from it, hips wiggling at the stimulation.

“N-no,” you whisper uselessly, inhaling sharply when he grabs your waist with one hand to keep you steady, forcing the vibrator against you.

“Look at that... feels good, huh?” You don’t reply, bottom lip tucked between your teeth as the coil in your belly tightens, your toes curling and your back arching, forcing the device against you even more.

Your mouth drops open and your eyes roll back as your body starts to convulse, a powerful orgasm tearing through your entire being.

“There it is,” Steve whispers, watching with dark eyes as he forces an orgasm out of you.

Your pussy flutters and clenches, clit swollen and aching when he finally removes the vibrator.

You’re still recovering from the intensity of your climax when he presses something cool to your entrance.

He forces the plug inside of you, despite your protests, then yanks your underwear back up your legs.

“Now c’mon. We’ve got guests to entertain.” He unties your wrists then helps you to your feet, watching in satisfaction as you struggle to walk down the stairs.

You rub your raw wrists, heart racing in your chest as you slowly walk into the dining room.

Bucky and Nat each look up at you, the redhead turning away while the brunet eyes you, a dark look in his eyes.

Steve’s hand remains possessively on the small of your back, and you carefully sit down, wincing at the burn in your backside and the throbbing of your core.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Steve says, a smile on his face as you portion out some food for him and yourself.

“It’s alright. Things happen,” Bucky replies, eyes stuck on your face.

“It’s been a while since we... since I last saw you, (Y/n). How have you been?” You swallow hard, eyes focused on your plate as you answer Bucky’s question.

“I’ve been fine. How have you been?” He takes a moment to answer, and in the thick silence of the room you can hear the metal plates in his arm whirring.

“I’ve been good. Happy that Steve has you back now.” You nod, forcing yourself to chew and swallow a mouthful of pasta.

“Mommy I’m full! Can we go for ice cream now? Aunty Nat and Uncle Bucky said we could!” You nod, pushing your almost untouched food away and standing up quickly.

“J-just let me clean up, then we can go for ice cream.” You start gathering the dishes, eager to leave the room and put some distance between yourself and the people at the table.

“I’ll give you a hand,” Nat says, rising to her feet and gathering the other half of the dishes.

You ignore her, grabbing the remainder of the food and starting to pack it up in containers in the kitchen.

“(Y/n), I’m sorry.” You shove the food into the fridge and turn to face her, tears welling up in your eyes.

“You’re sorry? That’s it? You’re fucking sorry?! I’m right back where I fought tooth and fucking nail to escape because of you! You’re the reason I’m back here with him, why Sarah’s back here and why he’s hurting me all over again and all you have to say for yourself is ‘I’m sorry’?!” Your voice is whispered, but the words may as well be shouted.

She shakes her head, hating the truth behind your words.

“Y-you don’t understand, (Y/n). I had to.” You sniffle and scrub a fallen tear off of your cheek.

“Or what? Would he kill that rapist boyfriend of yours? You swore you’d keep it a secret and now, because of you, my father’s dead and I’m stuck with a man who’s going to torture me and possibly my daughter as well. So don’t you fucking dare tell me you had to or that you’re sorry because those are both lies.”

You take a few deep breaths, walking to the sink and starting to wash the dishes.

“I trusted you. And you led him straight to us. I don’t care what you say or what you do, I’ll never fucking forgive you. If it were up to me, you’d be left at that cabin to bleed out. It’s what you fucking deserve after what you’ve done.”

She’s silent, standing there behind you for a long moment before turning and leaving the kitchen.

Your hands shake with the intensity of your outburst and you have to stop yourself from crying, chest rising and falling rapidly as your emotions get the better of you.

Your vision starts to blur, soapy hands gripping the edge of the counter tight enough to hurt. You lean over slightly, trying desperately to suck in more air as anxiety fills and overwhelms you.

“(Y/n)?” You don’t notice his hands on you until he’s pulling your hands off of the counter.

“I-I can’t.”

His hands find your waist, trying to usher you away from the sink, and your ears begin to ring.

Your knees give out and you crumble in his arms, him easily supporting your weight as you lose consciousness.

“Buck, take Sarah out for ice cream now.” His voice holds the same type of authority as it does when they go on missions, and the brunet pops his head into the kitchen to investigate for a moment before nodding.

“C’mon Sarah. Do you know what you want?” Bucky asks, taking Sarah’s hand and leading her to the front door.

“Do you?” She sasses.

“Well missy, I’m gonna get two scoops of chocolate, and Aunty Nat's getting mint chocolate chip.”

“I want cookie dough!”

The front door closes with a soft click and Steve sighs, scooping you up in his arms and carrying you to the bedroom.

[toushindai]

Respect and approval in the relationship between Zagreus and Megaera

So, I think a lot of people know that there's a mini storyline between Megaera and Zagreus that proceeds as follows: Megaera brusquely informs Zagreus that his victories against her "don't count" as he couldn't possibly have achieved them without Nyx's help via the mirror. If you respond to this by emptying out the mirror and fighting her, she'll remark on it. This exchange is referenced in an incredible video about Hades' dialogue system that I will link in the comments to this post (since we all know how tumblr is about links) and which I highly recommend if you haven't watched it already.

But I was surprised that the video didn't go on to highlight what is my favorite (and surely relevant to the video?) aspect of this storyline--that once you've beaten Meg like that, the followup conversation at home has three different variants based on how many gifts you've given her!

Spoilers for a lot of late-game, including post-credits, content.

The three variants are low relationship (zero gifts - five gifts); high relationship (six gifts - nine gifts); "became close" relationship (ten gifts).

At low relationship, the conversation is as follows. I apologize but I don't have screenshots for any of these; I'm taking the text from the files.

Megaera: Beaten. By you. Without the help of Nyx's mirror. You humiliated me. And now you've come to rub it in, I guess? Well, go on, then. Not like you can shame me any more. Zagreus: Meg, what is it going to take for you to quit treating me like I'm incompetent? Have I not grown even a little since we met? You were supposed to teach me something; what does that make you? Megaera: Tsch... why don't you raise your voice a little louder so that all the House can hear. Is that what you want? For everyone to know that you're superior to me? Zagreus: You're not hearing me, Meg. I know it sounds a little disingenuous considering we keep fighting to the death and all, but... I never meant to hurt you. Megaera: You give yourself far too much credit, Zagreus. Leave me alone.

At high relationship:

Megaera: Beaten. By you. Without the help of Nyx's mirror. You humiliated me. And now you've come to rub it in, I guess? Well, go on, then. Not like you can shame me any more. Zagreus: Meg, that isn't why I'm here, you know that isn't how I am. Why can't you see it? All I've ever wanted was to prove myself to you. Megaera: Tsch... you think that you can prove yourself to me by winning in a fight? Zagreus: Sometimes I think that I can never really win with you, Meg. If I held back, what would you have thought? Megaera: If you think you know me so well, Zagreus, then you ought to know better than to keep this conversation going with me, now.

(Yeah, that's "high relationship.")

At became close relationship:

Megaera: I can't believe it, Zag. I thought for sure that Nyx's mirror was the only reason you could beat me. I knew you'd changed to some extent, but... not this much. Zagreus: I had to see if I could do it, Meg. I've learned so much from you, I... thought maybe this was a way that I could prove myself to you. And to myself. Megaera: Prove yourself, to me...? You must not be as comfortable in your own skin as you let on. I can't decide if I like that about you. Now leave me alone while I give it some thought.

Which... it's better, right? It's better. It's maybe not great, still. But they are trying.

I mean so let's take this from the top. At low relationship, the conversation is fairly acrimonious on both sides. Feeling humiliated by her loss, Meg lashes out, and Zag snaps in return that if Meg's going to keep treating him like he's incompetent, it's only a reflection on her, who was supposed to teach him something. In this version of their conversation, we see the shadow of the relationship Hades pointedly engineered between the two of them raise its head, and if I were ever asked to textually back up my certainty that Meg, not only Zag, contributed to their breakup, I think I'd cite this. Meg's lack of respect for Zag is clearly a longstanding point of tension. Here, Zag feels like he's done something that ought to earn him her respect, only to be... what? Meg's first line is largely about her own insecurities rather than her opinion of Zag, but at the same time, the assumption that she should be superior, that that's the natural order of things, is baked into it. It's a serious blow to her pride that Zag has upset that natural order, and she's projecting her shame into an assumption that Zagreus is here to pettily gloat. Which is insulting, and Zagreus reacts from that place of insult.

But in his second line, as if he notices her pain, Zag is able to disengage from his anger a little (his portrait shifts from his angry "Defiant" one to his "Empathetic" one), realize that their communication is going a bit awry, and tell Meg that he doesn't mean to hurt her. This does not have the effect he possibly hoped for, and before Meg tells him to hit the bricks she says that he gives himself too much credit--by thinking that he has the capability to hurt her. Now this is a pattern with her, throughout their redeveloping relationship, even at max relationship, even once they're back together: Megaera repeatedly states that Zagreus can't hurt her. Here, it has a clear implication that she thinks Zagreus beneath her, not worth getting hurt over. ...It's absolutely belied by her humiliation in the rest of the conversation, but the scorn with which she makes the assertion is cutting and unkind.

Although... I do wonder. Especially given Zag's statement that he "never meant to hurt [her]"--that doesn't sound like he's just talking about his neat trick of getting past her darkness-free. He's referring to their past, almost certainly, and at 0-5 gifts this is well before he gets around to a proper apology or even his feelingsdump (feelingsdump, er, I'm sorry, "building trust", the "we need to talk" conversation, follows gift#6, the last nectar). What I wonder, sometimes, is--when Megaera says that Zagreus can't hurt her (boy does she love to say that.), if part of what she's saying is that Zagreus is not the only person contributing to the poor relationship between them. This is a thought on a different topic, I guess, and I'm not saying that in this conversation, she suddenly has a flash of insight that she's being kind of shitty and chases him away for that reason. Sincerely, I do think "I'm too good to be hurt by Zagreus" is an emotional habit she has for a sizeable chunk of time--perhaps one she developed as a reaction to their breakup, or as a shield against it as she saw it coming--and is what she means here. But maybe it means something else later. I certainly hope so. Because boy. she really loves to say it.

Let's talk about the variant at high relationship next. You could get this variant anywhere between the last nectar ("We may be immortals, but we're older now") and having given her the second-to-last ambrosia ("I wish I could do over how we started"). Once you give her the last ambrosia (when they drink together), you're in the territory of the final variant.

Meg's still cranky; her first line is the same as in the low relationship variant. It's Zagreus, who is at this time in the process of trying to get back in her good graces, who is less testy in response. I'd say he's clearly still hurt by her response, but he doesn't express that hurt by sniping back at her this time. Instead, he opens up, trying to make his intentions more clear, reminding her that he isn't the type to gloat. He all but says that he wants her respect. And he doesn't get it, here. Frankly, this variant is not much of an improvement on the low relationship one. Meg is less openly insulting, but it's clear that she still doesn't want to be having the conversation.

My thoughts on this variant are similar to my thoughts on some of the ambrosia conversations--and I say this as the most dedicated MegZag shipper you will ever see--in that when I see this, I'm not sure why Zagreus bothers. If, like he says, there's really no action he could take here that wouldn't end in Meg being peeved at him, what is he reaching for? He wants to prove himself to her--why? Is her approval worth having here? When Meg says (to cite the gift nine/third ambrosia conversation) that it's just a question of whether Zag is worth her time, why is it positive that Zagreus's wistful response is to ask her if he is worth her time, then?

Let me start bringing in the became close relationship variant here, starting with the last line of it, because Meg's response to Zagreus outright stating that he wants to prove himself to her is emotionally very similar to her response to Zag asking her if he is worth her time. In both cases, she seems to... not soften, exactly. She seems taken aback. She sees Zagreus's desire for her approval and his vulnerability that he lays bare in front of her, and in both cases, her response is one of uncertainty. She wants time to think about it on her own. She has kept hardening herself in response to the pain of their earlier failure (not every relationship that doesn't work out is a failure but I am quite certain she felt this way about theirs, if only because she was supposed to shape Zagreus a certain way), she hardens herself verbally and defiantly right in front of Zag's damn face, and he answers with wistful vulnerability. She tells him he can't hurt her, and he answers with "OK. But do you care about me? Could you?"

I almost wonder if Zagreus's vulnerability makes Megaera ask herself the same questions that these conversations make me ask myself. That remark she makes, that she's not sure how she feels about Zagreus's insecurity--I wonder if she's seeing how she's contributed to it, and needs time to figure out how to respond more kindly. And not just "more kindly," but in a way that's better for him. In the became close relationship conversation variant, Meg starts off in a much better mood, and offers the approval that--as we've seen in the other variants--Zagreus wants so keenly. However, when he states that as an outright motivation, I think she questions that influence she has on Zagreus, and wavers on whether or not it's a positive one, and wants to withdraw to sort out... everything about that situation. It's not an emotionally vulnerable response, maybe, but I do get the sense that it's a compassionate one.

These two are not perfect. They're coming from a background of a relationship that was arranged for them with the explicit intention of forcing Zagreus to mature--a setup that implicitly (if Hades didn't go ahead and make it explicit which, lbr, he very possibly did) defines Megaera as more mature and therefore superior. That relationship fell apart--and how could it not, with a setup like that--and some time has passed, and now they're stuck in a loop of fighting each other to the death. It's not ideal! But they cared about each other, back during their first relationship. Zagreus outright tells us that he caught feelings. Megaera talks around the same admission--through the rigidness with which she tells Zagreus and herself that they can't return to the way things were, that it isn't possible; through her admission, when Zag says he wishes he could change how they started, that she too "wish[es] for a lot of things." They cared-past-tense and they care-present-tense, but they still have emotional habits from the past, from the imposed hierarchy of their first relationship, and even in the most positive variant of Meg's response to the darkness-free victory, even in some of their biggest steps forward, we see some of those habits rear their head. It's something they have to work on and will continue to work on, I think.

And it's not a hopeless process. One of the best in-game contrasts to this dynamic is (of all things) when Megaera notices that Zagreus has made it onto the Featured Houseservant board. She remarks that never in her wildest fantasies did she imagine that Zagreus would make it up there. Zagreus, I think, doesn't know how to respond to that--he picks up the "wildest fantasies" thread rather than the compliment, bless this horny little man--but Meg is undeterred and points out that he really should be proud of such an achievement. And I think this is the perfect solution to the dilemma that is Zag's desire for Meg's approval, because Meg's uncertainty over that, her sense that it's an insecure concern, is justified. So here, she's showing that she respects his achievement but emphasizing that it's something about him, something he can and should feel intrinsic pride over, rather than just taking pleasure in her extrinsic approval.

This has gotten long (oh god it has gotten long) so I think I'll wrap up here. One of the things I love about Hades is how it doesn't force relationships to be Suddenly Great Now That The Story's Over. Hades and Zagreus are still struggling to figure out a relationship that works. Persephone isn't sure she knows how to be Zagreus's mother. Meg's still not getting along with her sisters (although it has been brought to her attention that she is as culpable in their relationship as they are). I think this point of awkwardness between Zagreus and Megaera--their having to figure out a system of mutual respect where it has not been before--is another example of that pattern. And I think they've got a shot at it. I think they can pull it off.

[isthataneren]

apologies ~ bakugou katsuki

request: hello! I was wondering if you could do a Bakugou x Reader (if requests are open ofc❤️). Maybe Bakugou said something he didn’t mean to the Reader, and she like leaves the middle of class to go to the bathroom to cry- and like some of the girls go to comfort her/ask if she’s doing fine. But that doesn’t help- so Bakugou ditches class and goes to comfort her in the girls bathroom, and the other girls are like “cUtE”. Sorry if this made no sense but I thought it would be cute 😳. love your writing!

a/n: Thank you! And of course! This is a really cute idea and I may have went overboard with it haha but I hope you like it! It kind of turned into a first ‘I love you’ scenario too...

∫ pairing: bakugou x fem!reader

∫ warnings: cussing, (too much?) fluff, slight angst in the beginning

∫ word count: 1.7k+

Being with Bakugou had its ups and downs. Most of the time he was kind to you in his own way; pressing a chaste kiss to your head before class in the morning as he walked by your desk or shoving a drink in your hand when he sat with you at lunch. 

Occasionally he would say things that others would see as mean to say, especially involving you and your fighting. Nothing bad necessarily, just criticizing your form. You knew he meant well with his slightly harsh remarks but sometimes he would say or do something that would hit you deep. Even if you knew what he said wasn’t intended to be offensive, it still could affect you. This has only happened once in your relationship so far, and today was that day, unfortunately.  

You were sitting in the classroom, waiting for the next class to start. Today had been pretty bad so far. There wasn’t much reason for why you felt so upset but you guessed it was all of the all nighters you’ve been pulling to finish a project that you didn’t even want to do to begin with. The other people who were supposed to help you ditched so you were stuck with doing all of the work. Figures.  

The stress had been weighing on you for a while, causing you to be pushed to a limit you didn’t know you had. 

Of course, this was also a day when Bakugou wasn’t feeling too nifty either. I mean, he normally didn’t look like he was happy but today he was even grumpier than normal. When you went to greet him, he only grunted in response, which in hindsight you should have picked up on right away that he didn’t want to be bothered. Due to your inability to pay attention when you’re stressed, however, it slipped your attention.  

It only got worse as the day progressed. You would try to ask him something and he would still only grunt at you, not bothering to look up from what he was doing. This was causing you to become a little more upset than you already were. Was he mad at you? Did you do something wrong? Did something happen that he wasn’t telling you?

All of the negative thoughts were causing your head to spin so you decided to do the only rational thing (at least it seemed rational at the time) and confront him about it.  

The bell had just wrung to signal class switch. You had around five minutes to ask Bakugou what was wrong.  

You slowly approached his desk, taking a deep breath to steel your nerves.

“Katsuki...”  

“...” No response.

“Is something wrong?”

“...”

Biting your lip, you toy with your uniform slightly, trying to push down the tears that are starting to form in your eyes.

“Did I say something yesterday to make you mad?”

“...”

“I’m sorry but please, talk to me!”

He finally snapped; his voice sharp.

“SHUT UP! Holy shit you’re annoying sometimes...”  

It felt like a weight fell on your shoulders, causing them to sag slightly as the tears you were holding back began to fall. His words finally pushed you to your limit.

“Oh...okay...”, you cough slightly to cover up a soft sob, “I-I’ll just go then.”  

And with that, you ran out of the classroom, avoiding the calls of your worried classmates. You ran until you reached the bathroom at the end of the hallway a couple halls down. After running inside, you slammed the stall door shut, collapsing in the tiny space, finally breaking down into sobs.

Mina turned to Bakugou, glaring at him.

“Bakugou what the hell man?”

She, along with the other girls of the class, ran out to follow you.

Bakugou slammed his palm on the desk, before sighing heavily, dragging his hand through his hair. He could feel the glares of some of his classmates burning through his back.

“Fuck.”

A couple of minutes later Jiro came through the door, worry displayed on her face. Her expression caused the others to tense slightly. Kirishima was the first to speak up.

“Is she alright? Where is she?”

“She’s in the bathroom. She won’t answer us. I can tell she’s crying though.”

Bakugou’s heart drops into his stomach when he hears that, his face faltering slightly. Jiro turns to him, giving him a pointed look.

“Bakugou, I think it would be best if you talked to her instead. You know she’s been having a hard week, right?”

Of course, he had noticed you were stressed but you tend to clam up so as to not bother him when you feel this way. Usually you come around and tell him what wrong but you didn’t this time. He felt stupid for not trying to talk to you sooner.

“I knew it had been shitty but not this shitty.”

“Well, right now she needs some comfort and you need to apologize.”

He was already going out of the door before she could finish her sentence.  

“I know.”

The bell wrung as soon as Bakugou located where the other girls were at. They all turned to face him with varying expressions. None of them were happy, though they all looked a little relieved that he showed up.

Not saying a word, he brushed past them but paused when he heard Momo speak.

“Don’t hurt her again.”

He replied instantly, his voice firm.

“I won’t.”

And with that, he let the door close behind him.

It was silent for a couple of seconds until Bakugou heard a soft sob.  

“Y/N?”

You fell silent, not wanting him to see or hear you when you were an absolute mess.

“Leave me alone.”

His heart cracked a little hearing the tears in your voice.

“I’ll leave you alone if you listen.”

“...”  

“I-”  

He sighed heavily. You could tell he was trying to figure out what to say.

“Fuck. I’m sorry.”

When you didn’t speak, he continued.

“I’m sorry for saying what I did. You’re not annoying. You never are. I was just frustrated about some shitty stuff that happened this morning and it had been bothering me to the point that it made me angry. I didn’t want to upset you which is why I wasn’t respondi-”

“You’ll miss class.”

He stared incredulously at the stall door that you were in. You really thought that was important at the moment?

“You think I care about some shitty class when you, the girl I love, are crying in the fucking bathroom because of me? Are you kidding? You’re more important to me than that.”  

His words made you tear up more but this time for a different reason. Slowly opening up the stall you look at him with eyes wide with surprise.

“You love me?”

Not moving, he stared back at you, defiant.  

“Yes, I love you. I know this isn’t the best way to say it,” he gestured with his hand at the fact that you were in a bathroom, “but you need to hear it. I want you to hear it. It doesn’t take back what I said, and that’s not what I’m trying to do but I mean it. I love you so fucking much it scares me sometimes. I thought the only thing I would ever care about is becoming the best pro-hero but then you walked through the door the first day of class.”  

He paused, closing his eyes and taking a breath to try to reign in his emotions a little. You just stood watching him, eyes still wide.

Opening his eyes, he continued.

“I wouldn’t say it was love at first sight because that would be a damn lie. But every day a little more of me seemed to become attracted to you until one day I realized that you were just as important to me as becoming a pro-hero. It scared me, feeling like this. When you ran out today, after I realized what I had said, I knew that I couldn’t avoid this anymore. I was scared that I was going to lose you. I still am. All because I can’t keep my shitty mouth shut.”  

His face was blushing slightly as he looked off to the side to avoid your gaze.  

“Katsu...”

Not even a second later a weight hit him.

“Wha-”

Your arms encircled his waist as you buried your face in his chest. Once he realized you were hugging him, he relaxed slightly, wrapping his arms around you as well.

It was silent for a second before you mumbled against him.

“I’m sorry for being overdramatic.”

He scoffed.

“Don’t apologize, you aren’t being dramatic. I’m the only one who needs to apologize. I should have been a better boyfriend and talked with you instead of fucking snapping your head off.”

Pulling away from him slightly you gave him a soft smile.

“Let’s work harder to talk about our problems then, yeah?”

Chuckling, he ruffled your hair before pulling away completely.

“Yeah.”

After a couple of seconds of looking at each other you had a realization.

“Wait a minute...You followed me into the girls’ bathroom?!”

He deadpanned. 

“Really? Again, you think I care?”

“Well no but...won’t you get in trouble?”

“We’re both going to get in trouble for being late to class so I don’t think it matters much.”

You nodded at his reasoning, ignoring his amused stare.

“I guess we should get back to class then. Everyone’s probably worried...”

“Tch.”

You walked to the bathroom door, opening it as you talked to Bakugou, who was close beside you.

“I wonder if they-” you paused, seeing that most of the girls were still outside of the bathroom, “uhhh guys? Why are you not in class?”

Uraraka smiled sheepishly while Mina eyed you both with a smirk on her face.

“We wanted to make sure you were alright...”

“Mic said he wouldn’t start until you guys were back. Jiro explained what was happening. We’ll probably get detention though.” Mina grinned. “It was so worth it.”

“EH?! What are you talking about raccoon eyes?”

“You guys are cute. You know that?”

“Shut it!”

Mina snorted before turning around waving slightly.

“Let’s go!”

The others followed while you hung back with Bakugou. He was grumbling under his breath about what Mina had said, causing you to grin slightly.  

“Katsuki?”

He looked at you, raising an eyebrow in question. Reaching out, you took his hand into yours before you leaned up to press a soft peck to his cheek.

“I love you too.”  

Letting go, you jogged to catch up with the girls who were walking into the classroom, leaving a very flustered and speechless angry boy behind.

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS DAYLIGHT Vol. 4 Sakamaki Subaru [Track 1]

Original title: 不機嫌の理由

Source: Diabolik Lovers Daylight Vol. 4 Sakamaki Subaru

Audio: Here [Original & Adjusted pitch versions available]

Seiyuu: Takashi Kondou

Translator’s note: This CD has been a rollercoaster of emotions. When I first started listening to it, I was so distraught by the drastic change in Subaru’s voice, I had a hard time focusing on the actual content. Thankfully, I found a solution and was able to listen to the altered pitch version while doing my translation, which really helped me enjoy it much more. uwu

Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 + Epilogue

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Track 1: The Reason Behind a Bad Mood

The scene starts with Subaru running around frantically in the forest.

“Haah, haah, haah, haah...Ugh, fuck!! ...Hah...I’ve been runnin’ all over...So why can’t I find this damn thing!? I have to hurry or she’llーー...!! ...I’ll find it no matter what...She’s the one person I won’t let die...!”

He continues running.

*FLASHBACK*

Subaru enters the entrance hall.

[01:05] “...Oi! I thought it was weird you weren’t in your room, but this is where you’ve been? ...Don’t tell me, you’re not ‘bout to head out, are you?”

You nod.

“Ah...? Do you have any idea what time it is? Why can’t you just do groceries tomorrow?”

You insist.

“Ugh...! ...What is it you want?”

You explain.

“Takoyaki and donuts...!? Why do you need those thi...Tsk. Must be Ayato and Kanato, huh? Did they ask you?”

You nod.

[01:45] “So that’s why you’re thinkin’ of makin’ a casual trip to the grocery store in the middle of the night? They’re makin’ you run errands for them ‘cause you always just obediently nod your head in response. Just ignore them!”

You frown.

“...Tsk! Let’s just go then...”

You seem surprised.

[02:07] “I can’t stop you, can I? In that case, I’m taggin’ along. You really think I’m lettin’ you head out by yourself?”

You thank him.

“I...I’m not worried or anythin’...! I’m only comin’ with you ‘cause I’ve got nothin’ better to do! Don’t get the wrong idea! ...Now just follow me!”

*TIMESKIP*

[02:42] “...Oi. You still haven’t made a choice? All donuts are the same, no!? Just how long do you need to make up your damn mind!? ーー She’s not even listenin’. Ah-ah...Look at that serious expression on her face. All for Kanato’s sake, what a fool.”

You continue looking at the donuts. 

“...Ugh, whatever! I’ll be waitin’ for you outside. This sickly sweet smell is makin’ me gag!”

He leaves the store.

*TIMESKIP*

The two of you are walking back home.

[03:33] “...Hah.”

You ask if he’s upset.

“Haah? …I’m not mad, really.”

You seem worried that he’s upset about what you did earlier.

[03:41] "If you feel that way, you already have a clue, don’t you? Then stop pesterin’ me with your questions. …It’s annoyin’. …For one, you should have never listened to those guys in the first place. Next time you better refuse, no matter what they tell you to do. You’re in no way obligated to take orders from them.

You protest.

“…Hah? What do you mean, ‘but’? You’ve got a reason or somethin’? You talk back to me all the time, but when it’s them, you suddenly become obedient, huh?”

Subaru corners you against the wall.

*Rustle*

[04:20] “— Ugh. Seems like…you’ve forgotten who you belong to. …You’re takin’ orders from other dudes left and right…It pisses me off seeing you like that. I’ll make you remember who’s the only guy you should ever listen to.”

You start to panic.

"There’s nobody ‘round, really. ...Even if there was, they wouldn’t be able to see us in the dark. Now if you just keep your voice down, nobody will notice. ...Come on, stop restlessly lookin’ ‘round and face me instead.”

*Rustle*

“Let me suck your blood...”

You grow flustered. 

[05:04] “...Heh.”

Subaru bites you.

*Gulp gulp*

“...Hah. You’re being surprisingy meek. Where’s the usual cheekiness, huh?”

You explain.

“Oh? You’re actually enjoyin’ it, aren’t you?”

You protest.

[05:28] “Hah? ...No wonder I thought you were clutchin’ it so protectively...Even in this kind of situation, you’re still worried ‘bout the stuff they asked for, huh!? I seriously don’t like this! Seems like you just never get the message unless I make myself loud and clear.”

You ask if he is mad. 

“Yeah, exactly. I’m mad. How could I not be!? It pisses me off how you keep on showin’ concern towards anyone and everyone but me! On top of that, you hesitate whenever I tell you to just ignore their requests! Stop takin’ orders from others already!”

You tilt your head to the side.

“...Hah? Whatcha lookin’ at? Are you goin’ to beg for mercy?”

You ask if he is perhaps jealous.

[06:22] “...Haah!? W-Who are you callin’ jealous!? ...Bullshit! For one, you’re to blame for being unable to just turn down their requests! All you need to do is say ‘no’ next time, yet you keep on sayin’ ‘but’ or ‘still’...What’s so bad ‘bout just turnin’ them down for once!?”

You try and defend yourself.

“Hah! Again with the ‘but’, huh? Just spit it out already!”

You explain.

“Hah? Well...Knowin’ those guys, it’s obvious they’d lose their shit. Kanato’s a pain in the ass with his angry tantrums and Ayato would probably say something like ‘Then give me your blood insteーー’ ...Wait, is that why you can’t turn down their requests?”

You nod, explaining that you don’t want anyone but Subaru to suck your blood.

[07:15] “...!! ‘Other than me’, you say...? ...Oh. So that’s why...”

You ask if something is wrong.

“...I-It’s nothin’...! Anyway, if that’s your reasoning, you should have told me sooner! How am I supposed to know from just a single ‘but’ or ‘I mean’...!?”

You apologize.

“Well...Seems like you haven’t forgotten who you belong to, at least. That’s why you don’t want anyone but me to suck your blood, right?”

You nod.

“...You need to make yourself a lil’ more obvious, honestly.”

You insist it is partially his fault for misunderstanding as well.

[07:56] “ーー Hah!? There was never any misunderstandings on my part! ...Besides, you sure have some nerve, puttin’ the blame on me. You really are defiant towards me. I was gonna let you off the hook ーー But scratch that. You’re at fault for enticing me. I’ll suck you from the other side next. ...I feel like leavin’ more and more of my marks on you.”

Subaru bites you again.

*Gulp gulp gulp*

“...Hah. You’re lettin’ your voice slip. I thought you didn’t want anyone to see us? Not that I care ‘bout that.”

*Ba-dump・ba-dump*

[08:50] “...? ...O-Oi! What’s wrong...!? I haven’t sucked that much for you to grow weak in your knees already, right!?”

You clutch your chest.

“...Are you feeling under the weather perhaps?”

You shake your head.

“You sure? You’d say that even if you aren’t actually ‘fine’, wouldn’t you?”

You insist that you’re fine.

[09:13] “...Okay then. ...Hah. Don’t give me a scare like that. It doesn’t feel good suckin’ from someone who’s shaky on their legs. Wanna just go home? ...Come on, gimme your hand.”

You grab his hand.

“It’d suck if you were to nearly collapse again, so hold onto it tightly, ‘kay?”

You nod.

“Haah...Ah, speakin’ of whichー Did the takoyaki and donuts you were oh-so worried ‘bout make it out unscathed?”

*Rustle rustle*

You shriek.

“Hehe...Guess they still got crushed in the end. Serves those bastards right!”

You frown and decide to avoid them once you’re home. 

[10:03] “...Hm? Ah, yeah, you do that. If not, who knows what you’ll have to go through when they take out their anger on you. I’ve been worried ‘bout that as well, so sounds great. Just stay within my sight for today.”

You tell him it will be fine.

“I don’t believe your ‘it’ll be fine’. So I’ll make sure to keep an eye on you even after we get home to ensure you don’t run in any trouble. ーー And if the coast is clear, I’ll continue where I left off earlier.”

You get flustered again.

“Hehe...Don’t freak out now. Come on, let’s go home.”

The two of you start walking back to the manor.

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

[forever-rogue]

hey, lovely, can you do #135 from the 390 prompt list for Agent Whiskey, if it sparks anything please

Prompt Used: “I think I’m in love with you and that scares me to death.”

Pairing: Jack Daniels x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: language

Pedro Character Masterlist

»»————-　♡　————-««

A small huff left your lips as you tried to open the front door, shifting the bags of take out to one shoulder. After a few moments of struggle, you finally managed to open the door to your apartment but found it surprisingly dark and empty. Odd. Jack should have been home by now; he’d said he was going to leave the office early today to be home in time for dinner.

“Jack?” you decided to and see if he was home - maybe he’d just forgotten to turn the lights or had just gotten home himself. Shuffling into the kitchen, you flicked on the light and set the bags on the counter. Taking out the containers one by one, you hummed under your breath and tired to decide what drink would go best with the Chinese. Perhaps it didn’t need to be anything fancy, so you grabbed a couple of bottles of beer and set them on the counter, “Jack? Baby? Are you home?”

When you still didn’t hear a response, you trapezed to the bedroom, turning on the hall light, stopping short of the bedroom when you realized it was all dark. He wasn’t home after all. Very odd. Fishing your phone out of your pocket, you scrolled through your notifications to make sure you hadn’t missed anything from Jack. But there was nothing. Zero, zilch, nada.

Pulling up his contact information, you quickly dialed his number and impatiently waited while it rang. And it rang, and rang, and rang, before going to voicemail.  

“Hey, Jack,” you tried to keep your voice as pointedly neutral as possible, “it’s just me. I thought you were going to be home early tonight? I-I got...all of our favorites for dinner. Maybe I...maybe I had the wrong day? Anyways, it’s been a bit since I’ve heard from you, so just let me know you’re okay or when you’re coming home. I love you.”

Ending the call, you frowned before heading back into the kitchen. You’d wait for him for now. Hopefully he was coming home soon and this was all some sort of misunderstanding. Grabbing your beer, you headed into the living room and pulled up Netflix, deciding to watch something while you waited.

And you waited. And waited. And waited.

»»————-　♡　————-««

But he never came. And he never called. And he never texted. He had gone radio silent.

At first you had been frustrated. Annoyed and upset, but then you became worried. It wasn’t like him to just disappear. Never.

So you kept trying to contact him to no avail. You’d called and gone to Statesmen headquarters to try and get some answers but no one was willing to give you any information. It seemed like they were all clamming up and refusing to help you. It was so odd...you’d never once experienced any sort of push back from them. None of his other friends or any of your friends had any information to provide either. It seems like a weird fever dream, but the fact that you continually woke up to an empty bed reminded you that it was all very well.

After a few days of the odd silence, you’d exhausted every resource you could think of. There was nothing else you could think of doing and it was driving you crazy. It was like Jack Daniels had just up and disappeared. But you knew he wasn’t dead - you knew that for a fact because you’d kept checking the news for any deaths and online obituaries. He was gone without a trace.

But why was the real question. Why? Why? Why?

You hadn’t had any sort of fight or argument or anything of the sort, there was nothing to suggest why he would suddenly leave. The only other tangible thought you had was that for some reason it was for your safety...but even that seemed like a stretch. He wasn’t taking on any work that proved extremely dangerous anymore, and things had been quiet. None of it made a lick of sense.

After almost two weeks, you weren’t sure if you were angry behind measure or desperately worried. At this point you just wanted answers, some sort of sign that Jack was alright.

»»————-　♡　————-««

You were sitting in the kitchen, in the very early morning hours when you should have been asleep, drinking coffee that was too dark and strong to be good. But it was the only thing keeping you company besides the agony of your loneliness. You picked up your phone and started scrolling through your social media aimlessly, but for whatever reason, you decided to try and call Jack one more time. You were positive that it was just going to go to voicemail, but you knew that you had nothing to lose at this point.

So you listened to it ring and ring but then to your surprise and shock...the call was answered.

“Hello?” he sounded tired, like you’d woken him up and he hadn’t even checked the caller ID. Your breath hitched in your throat as you realized that this was the first time you’d heard his voice in weeks; this was your sign that he was alive. Your surprise left you in stunned silence for a few moments too long, “hello? Who’s there?”

“J-Jack,” his name was but a mere whisper off of your lips as you tried to keep it together. You didn’t want to scare him and have him end the call then and there, but you needed to talk to him, “i-it’s me!”

"Oh," it was a sudden realization on his end as the line went silent for a few moments...clearly he hadn't meant to pick up this call. Your heart plummeted into your stomach as your brain tried to rationalize what was happening...normally he would have been overjoyed and excited to hear your voice, "hi."

"Jack," you let out a sigh of relief just knowing he was alive, "i-its been two weeks. I was worried sick, baby. You're alive, I'm so glad to your hear your voice."

"I'm fine," you could hear him rustling around before letting out a long sigh, "I'm...yeah."

"What the fuck happened?" there was a note of irritation in your voice as you realized that he didn't seem to want to explain his sudden absence, "I was waiting for you, that night we were going to get Chinese, and you...you never came home. I called and called and I searched everywhere for you. Where the hell have you been? I-is it work? Will you be home soon?"

There was nothing but jilted, stoic silence on the other end of the line. It was cold, hurtful, and every moment felt like it was a knife twisting in your heart.

"Jack?" you felt like banging your head on the table as you willed him to say something...anything, "Jack, please say something. I think you owe me at least an apology for up and leaving! I was worried sick, day and night!"

"Its not work," his voice was cold and steeled, "I'm...I'm not coming back, I'm sorry. You're right - I should at least have told you I was leaving so you wouldn't worry."

"What do you mean you're not coming back?" your throat constricted and suddenly your heart was pounding loudly in your ears. You couldn't have heard him right...right?

"I am...I'm not coming home," he repeated and this time it resonated in your soul, "I'm sorry...I can't come back."

"What the fuck?" your eyes stung with tears as you blinked back stinging, "you're just gone, no note, nothing. I felt like I've been losing my mind for the past two weeks and all you're telling me is that you're not coming back? What happened - what changed? Did I do something?"

"I know you're angry and you have every right to be. I should have...I should have said something and not just left you in the dark," he admitted with a heavy sigh as you scoffed, "but I'm sorry...I just can't come back. I don't expect you to forgive me or for you to understand."

"We've together for two years, Jack! Two years!"

"I know that," tears spilled down your cheeks as you tried to keep your lips from trembling, "and I'm sorry it ended this way."

"What ended? Why? How...it was just a normal day and then...you never came back," you didn't bother to hide your tears as your hands shook, "you just never came home. You left me...you left me do easily, without a word or anything."

"I'm sorry-"

"You're sorry?" your hurt and upset had quickly turned to anger and irritation,  "you're sorry!? I came home and expected to find my boyfriend and instead I got nothing! Absolutely nothing for two weeks and now you're sorry? That's rich, Jack. Why?"

"Please don't be upset..."

"I think I have every right to be upset," you whispered gently, "you just left me. I love you, we've been together for two years and you don't want me to be upset? I have every right to be upset! You owe me an explanation!"

"I left," he stated as you snorted, "and I didn't do it in the best way at all. For that I am sorry. But you have to understand I have my reasons."

"What reason could you possibly have for just leaving me?" you wanted to scream and cry, buy the worst of all was that you still just wanted...him, "why would you just leave me? Am I not enough?"

"No," he stated firmly, "no, you are more than enough. It's...me. I think...I know I'm in love with you and that scares me to death."

"You...love me but you left," you repeated back to him, "you love me but you're scared. So instead of talking to me about it...you just left."

"You know what happened to the last person I loved," he reminded you of the young wife and unborn child he'd lost. But that had been a long time ago and while you knew that the wound would never fully heal, you'd expected a little more faith in your relationship by now, "she was taken from me - everything was. I can't let that happen again."

"Jack, I know that was a lot to deal with," your voice lowered and softened as you ran a hand over your tired face, "but that was years ago and it's going to happen again. You can't just shut everyone you love or might love out. It's not fair to them or you."

"I would never forgive myself if something happened to you on account of me," that night of defiant determination crept back into his voice, "the only way to fully ensure your safety is to leave. I didn't do it in the best way, but it is the only. For what it's worth, I am sorry."

"Me too," you agreed, "I'm sorry you didn't feel like you could talk to me about all of this and tell me what you were feeling. I love you, Jack and nothing is going to change that. I wish you'd trust enough in your heart to come back to me."

"I'm sorry," for the first time it sounded genuine and like he actually meant it, "I do love you. But I don't trust myself...or anyone else not to prey on that fear. This is what's best. I'm sorry but I can't come back."

"Jack," you grew panicked, "please don't do this, please don't go. We can make make work-"

"I'm sorry," he insisted but you were still left incredulous, "but this is goodbye."

"Jack, don't..." the called ended and left you with silence. You stared at your phone before slowly setting it down and burying your face in your arms. Jack was a stubborn man and you knew that there was no changing his mind. Your whole life had just been changed and determined by one simple, horrible decision. Maybe...maybe one day he'd come to his senses...maybe.

"Goodbye, Jack."

»»————-　♡　————-««

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