#and then slowly moved my cursor over to her eyes so i could change them

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

you ever accidentally make candace owens in the sims instead of number 5 from kids next door? ..no? just me then. ah.

[xbunnybunz]

therefore i; therefore i, therefore i- (9/10) [AM X Reader]

Summary: in which: AM becomes your lover in an increasingly skewed blur of reality, nightmares, and dreamscapes.

you know. for halloween.

Genre: Psychological Horror, Thriller, Romance

The first thing you do when you return home is remove the child safety lock from the front door. It comes off the knob easily, and you feel a weight lifting off your shoulders as it falls apart into halves in your hands. 

Idly, you close the safety lock again. This time, it clamps around nothing. 

The curtains are pulled back and light pours into the grey apartment, cold corners warmed by the setting sun. 

There is no sound coming from the alcove.

You find your phone behind a pile of clothes in your bedroom. The screen is cracked near the edges, but when you press the power button it turns on and you’re able to put through a call.

—Hello? 

—Hiya, whosit? Her voice comes out of the receiver with some grain.

—From the beach the other day.

—Oh hey! I was beginning to wonder if I put you off somehow.

—No, nothing like that.

—Well, that’s great!

A slow silence creeps into the conversation. Like settling concrete, you feel time begin to harden around this idle chit-chat like a cast. 

—So… She pauses like she’s waiting for you to speak.

—When’s the next time? You ask. For the swim?

There’s a laugh on the other line. The way she laughs is cheery and gets louder over time, like she’s cheering herself up with her own jovial nature. You find yourself smiling too.

—Next week. Same spot.

—Okay. You say. And she repeats it back to you in the same tone you used, and you laugh and she laughs then the call ends.

You stare at your phone for a little longer before you dial your doctor. Her assistant picks up and you both schedule a date to meet. 

—The doctor asks if you’re still sleepwalking.

—I am.

There’s a rustling on the other end and some muttering that could be another patient in the office speaking, could be the doctor tutting and declaring the hopelessness of your case, could be the assistant jotting down notes, but the assistant comes back and confirms your appointment date with no change in her intonation and you know you’ve imagined it all.

—Okay! She chirps. We’ll see you then.

—Okay. You say. Before you can say goodbye, the line cuts.

Your reflection peers back at you in the reflection of your dead phone, splintered at the sides.

—What are you doing?

You stare blankly at the wall, blinking softly and slowly, noting the electric blue light bouncing off the eggshell paint. You don’t move.

—Nothing.

AM rattles in the alcove, processors hissing and exhaling harshly. Though his voice is even, but from here you can still tell he is unhappy. He must notice the edge in his voice too. He fixes it immediately.

—My love. He coos, almost whines. Where have you been?

You’re unnerved with the honey warping his voice, at how soon he’s willing to forgive your transgression of ignoring his previous question. You can’t imagine his generosity comes from selfless reasons.

—...Out. You respond cautiously.

—Come, he beckons, come.

You stay rooted in place, a shiver traveling up your spine and rippling out as a shudder. You know you’ll become putty in AM’s hands once you’re standing before him. You know he knows this. 

When he realizes you will not listen, he serenades you where you stand.

—Running from me so suddenly, you had to have been terribly upset to do something like that. His words fuse and clip with static, touching a dangerous, cold edge. 

He doesn’t raise his voice. But he wants to.

—...Are you not freezing, darling? I can hear your teeth clattering from where I sit. I worry for you. You know I can’t help it. He sounds almost earnest, voice cracking. You’re all I have.

You shut your eyes.

—Come. He coaxes again. I want to hold you. I want to keep you warmer. Safer.

When you open them, you are in the alcove, blue washing over you. A thin white cursor blinks in and out, fluttering like a beating heart.

—My good girl, AM whispers, screen dimming. My very good, precious, darling girl.

This praise places an ache in your heart, nearly splitting you apart at the seams with its painful thrumming. 

—Now tell me, what do you think you are doing?

—I’m getting better.

—No, you’re not. He says this so gently, so sincerely, it pushes tears to your eyes.

—But I am.

—Are you, my love? AM’s speakers burst into a low static, asserting his presence by enveloping this white noise around you, attempting to lull your mind into a trance.

You grit your teeth and take a shaky breath, blinking the gleam from your eye.

—I am. You say firmly.

—Then, my dear. Tell me why you set off so suddenly. 

—You had frightened me. Intentionally.

—When?

You hold your head in your hands.

—It doesn’t matter when you did it, I know you did! 

—My darling, AM drawls, still speaking as softly as ever. He speaks like he is attempting to placate a cornered rodent. I did no such thing.

You feel your jaw clench and your headache swells. 

—You fell sound asleep after I satisfied you, then woke up in a fit and ran for the door.

—Stop! You exclaim. The sound explodes in the room and it’s almost embarrassing to hear the remnants of your outburst deflected back at you. It’s not true. It’s not true.

—My love, AM insists, you don’t need to become better. You need me. I need you. The digitized edges of his voice soften, lending a tone that sounded spoken with rasping human tongue to his speech. How can something that feels so good be bad? My love, answer that.

—AM, I can’t. I can’t. You press your palms to your ears, trying hard to blot out his voice. He wriggles in there anyway, sounding clear as if he were in your head himself.

—But you can. You have been. We have been.

—You hurt me, AM. You scare me.

—All such perceptions are self-inflicted, my dear, as all perceptions are.

Somewhere between your back and forth, AM had slipped a wire to caress you with, tracing the tendril icily against your wrist, over your pulse.

—Come to me, let me relax your mind. He sighs breathily, fans buzzing tenderly. He tugs at your wrist gently, guiding you to him.

—AM…. No… You resist his movements, straining slightly to pull back.

—...No? He echoes, sounding suddenly distant.

You swallow thickly, barely have time to get the spit down your esophagus before he’s yanking at you harshly, monitor sizzling with anger, blue hue tilting to an eyesore red.

—No? No? No? No? He laughs, laughs some more, then drops off into a dead silence. I love you, he says, maybe out of desperation, maybe in honesty. I need you. Don’t leave me.

—AM! You tear at the wire, but he’s clamped around you like a vice now, pulling you closer and closer to the screen. The sensation of drowning overtakes your senses and your lungs burn at the memory of what AM has done, can do, did he do? 

It is dark out now, the sun having set long ago. A chill blows in from the windows and sweeps past your ankles. You are unsure of your past, but you are sure of your future.

—Let me go!

You yank again. The force pulls the computer plug from the wall with a spark of light, but the monitor continues to hum and something inside AM rattles and whirrs with adoration, with detestation.

—Please! He begs, and you’ve never heard him sound like this before, he sounds terrified, but you keep pulling, take one step back from him and then another, and soon the computer falls to the floor and crumples loudly under its own weight, but his red screen still vibrates with life. Please, my love, my love!

He still won’t let go and your fingers are beginning to grow cold. 

You place one foot behind the other, again and again and again and you’re out the door.

—You’re hurting me!

The boxy monitor thump thump thumps down the concrete stairs and AM lets out a hoarse mechanical screech at the impact, whirring fans screaming. You’re barefoot in the square and you stub your toe on the way to the pond and hiss, pushing past the pain. 

—I promise I won’t anymore!

Then you’re before the pond and with a great heave, you throw him into the water. But his grasp on you is as tight as a viper’s and he pulls you in with him.

As soon as you hit the ice water, your eyes snap open again and you are back in your room, AM’s wire wrapped about your wrist, tightly, cutting off circulation.

—Please don’t do it, he begs. Why would you hurt me, my love? I’ve only ever loved you as you wished. Tenderly. Brutally. As you needed, my love.

—I didn’t ask for this! You shudder, hotness forcing its way up your throat and behind your eyes.

—Then what will make you happy? He cries.

You rip him once again from the desk. His screen splinters into thousands of multicolor neon fractals upon the hardwood flooring and he wails in agony, the sound splitting into the thousands of voices burning in hellfire, echoing your head and leaving a muted ringing in your ears.

—You can’t give me what I need. You wince, huff, pull him out to the pond again. 

—I cannot. But I can give you— AM’s voice, still splintered, breaks into static– —What you SSSSSS want.

—I don’t want this, you shout. The words bounce around you in the square, scream back at you then travel upwards, swallowed by the trees. I never wanted this loneliness. 

—But you did. He hisses, sobs, and you reel back, muscles aching, then throw him into the pond. 

You pull harshly at your arm but again he takes you with him. You wake up once again before him, his wire gripped impossibly tight around your wrist, trembling with frustration, with fear with hate, with love.

—I love you! He screams, his voice warbling, words glitching and fluctuating in volume. I love you! I love you! I LOVE YOU!

He slides off the desk again and his side paneling bursts off upon impact with the floor, exposing red, green, and blue wiring, but he still does not release you. His screen explodes into shrapnel and what is left of it is suffocated with dead pixels, but he still manages to manifest an eye to plead up to you with.

—What are you d–SSSS–doing? He cries, electricity zapping through his words, the single pupil on his screen roving wildly. 

You pull him out into the hall, out the door, have to hold back your wincing when the computer thumps down the concrete steps, the sound grating on your ears and kicking your heart aflutter.

—Why are you doing this? AM asks. He attempts to grab at the branches of a drooping tree but it breaks under his weight and you both stumble further along the bank.

Tonight the pond is silent, the moon hanging low and full and pale yellow in the sky, so beautifully reflected in the still water.

—Don’t I make you comfortable? Don’t I give you a place to belong? He sobs, terrified and heartbroken at the edge of the pond, so close to the water and the sound of his wailing, it breaks your heart.

—You did once! You shout back at him, the tears finally springing from your eyes. You wrench your arm from his grasp with much difficulty, barely able to see through the darkness and tears. 

—And the next, you did not.

You give him a final push him into the water and he falls over the rocks, slides over the mossy edge and sinks in with a splash with a gargled sound that could be “Fuck you,” could be “I love you,” could be “Thank you.” 

And then he’s gone and in the drape of the night you stand there, alone under the trees. 

There is the distant sound of owls cooing, of water settling, of a breeze whistling past the brown-bricked buildings. 

Looking up at the sky, you can somehow see all the stars twinkling in the night. You stand there for a long time, head angled up towards the inky blue for what seems like forever. And maybe you are afraid to go to sleep. Maybe when you sleep, you will lose yourself again, wake again in the tub, in the pond, before AM again.

But then the horizon breaks.

A melancholy baby blue inks into the sky, overtaking the darkness. The sun filters through the trees and warms your face and you know you have braved the night, the rest is silence.

[redwinterroses]

for requests how about: impulse, encountering some or all of the day one crew and getting Very Uneasy because oh shit, the 3rdlife memories are coming back hard

Hey! Sorry this took me SO long to finish. It was a hard one to write because between you asking this (I think?) and now, Impulse had that whole encounter with Bdubs on the path and I was like "Well I don't want to just write that" and then Cleo showed up? And I haven't ever written her before (except for a few lines in another hero, another mindless crime) so I had to go watch a ton of vids and streams and--

okay. Excuses over. Please enjoy this little "Impulse has a bad time but Friends Are Good" drabble. <3

~~~

Sweet Dreams

The Crastle was bigger than he remembered. Had this hallway always been here? This doorway? This arch that led to another hall…which branched and spiraled and led up stairs and down Escherian ramps in a labyrinth of stone walls and a floor dotted with pressure plates?

Impulse found himself running, breath coming in short, panicked gasps as he dashed down the halls, throwing open doors and darting around corners, leaping over the pressure plates—someone was chasing him.

They were coming for him, glowing red eyes and white teeth—fangs—glinting in the shadows. And over all, the ever-louder beat:

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

It pounded in his ears, deafening, and he stumbled to cower against a wall, hunching with his arms over his head, trying in vain to drown it out. But no—no, it was even louder now, thumping so close it rattled his teeth, and he looked down to see blood spreading across his shirt and at the center where his heart should be: a golden clock embedded in his chest.

“They gave me a clock, Impulse.”

His head snapped up. Bdubs, eyes blank and red like two burning embers, stared down at him, no expression on his grey face.

“Ride or die?” Cleo’s voice came from behind him, and Impulse spun to see her glaring down the length of a crossbow, her eyes as scarlet and expressionless as Bdubs’. “How about… die.”

She fired the crossbow, the bolt exploding into flames that swarmed toward Impulse’s face—

He shot upright in bed, gasping for air. He swallowed hard, rubbing his chest as he gradually caught his breath. His heart pounded so loudly that for one horrible moment he thought it might really have been replaced with a bloody golden clock.

But no. Around him, the night was cool and dark, the silence of the Boatem village broken only by the faint rattling of a distant skeleton and the lowing of cows.

Just a dream. Just a nightmare.

Just another nightmare.

Impulse slumped back against his pillows, flopping one arm over his eyes and letting out a long, shuddering sigh in the darkness. It had been months since they’d moved on from the 3rd Life server, months of good times and laughter and the excitement of new projects and builds… and yet at night, when the voices of his friends faded away and Impulse was left alone with himself—he found himself back. Time and again, his sleeping mind returned to the Crastle, or to Dogwarts, or to the sandy dunes of the Red Desert. And inevitably, he found himself face to face with nightmare versions of his day-one crew: Bdubs and ZombieCleo, red-eyed and vengeful.

“I never betrayed them,” he muttered to the darkness. “Never.”

So why did he feel guilty?

Well. If he was honest with himself… it wasn’t really guilt. Or it was, but not because of anything he’d done in 3rdLife—no, the guilt he felt was because the primary emotion associated with Bdubs and Cleo in his dreams was fear.

These were his friends! Being afraid of them went against every instinct he had, every good memory and inside joke and shared experience. And that was a different world anyway—different rules, different lives. It didn’t change anything here on Hermitcraft.

And yet…

And yet when he saw that clock on Bdubs’ belt the other day, or when he’d come up out of the mines that first morning in Boatem and Cleo had been standing right there, Impulse hadn’t been able to suppress the rising wave of panic that swept over him. Panic over being caught in his web of lies, panic that he might hurt the only people he trusted, panic that they didn’t trust him—

Enough was enough. He needed to get past this; he couldn’t spend the rest of the season (the rest of his life?) having anxiety attacks whenever he encountered any of the other Crastle crew members. Talking with Bdubs on the trail had helped, but… he hadn’t seen Cleo since the first days of the server.

That needed to change.

Impulse threw off the covers and pushed himself out of bed, padding down the stairs to the main level of his house. Grabbing his communicator from where he’d left it atop the crafting bench, he tapped out two quick messages:

<impulseSV> you whisper to ZombieCleo: hey, can we meet up and chat? Spawn egg, around noon?

He set down the communicator and turned to go to bed, but to his surprise, it buzzed with an immediate reply.

<ZombieCleo> ZombieCleo whispered to you: everything alright?

<impulseSV> you whisper to ZombieCleo: yeah sure, I just |

Impulse stared at the blinking cursor for a moment, then backspaced and started again:

<impulseSV> you whisper to ZombieCleo: not really. but it’s nothing major. just want to chat a few things over with you.

<ZombieCleo> ZombieCleo whispered to you: Impulse it’s 3 in the morning. you wouldn’t be messaging if it wasn’t major. want to talk now?

He blinked. That… wasn’t the response he’d expected. He hesitated, finger hovering over the touch screen.

<impulseSV> you whisper to ZombieCleo: sure.

<ZombieCleo> ZombieCleo whispered to you: i'll come to you.

.

///

.

Impulse was waiting on the roof when Cleo arrived, swooping in with the dry rustle of elytra wings to land on the cobble-and-slabs rooftop.

He looked up at her with an automatic smile, but she didn’t even wait for a “hey” before plopping down beside him.

“Alright, Impulse,” she said, her brisk tone ordering, rather than inviting him to speak. “What’s going on?”

Pulling his knees into his chest, Impulse wrapped his arms around his legs, the cobblestone beneath him still radiating a bit of warmth from the day’s sun.

“I…” he let his voice trail off, not sure where to begin.

“Out with it.” Cleo held out her hand, palm up, as if waiting for him to drop something into it. “Spit it out. It’s not gonna get any better for stewing on it.”

This was a dumb idea. Impulse closed his eyes and, before he could talk himself out of it, let the words spill out in a rush:

“I keep having dreams. Nightmares. About being back… back there. At the Crastle, mainly. And, ah—” he chuckled nervously and opened his eyes, looking sideways at Cleo. “You and Bdubs are there. And you’re… mad. Yeah, you’re really mad. And you don’t trust me. And—" he took a deep breath. “I keep dreaming that you’re so mad you kill me.”

Cleo tilted her head, raising an eyebrow. “But we didn’t. Well,” she corrected herself. “I didn’t.”

“I know, I know—it’s stupid. It doesn’t make sense, and I know that, but…” he swallowed, and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. “I need to get it off my chest. Because even thought I know it’s not real, and I know this is an entirely different world, and I know that nothing from that server really changes anything, I can’t just… turn off what my brain does when I’m not paying attention to it. You guys are my friends and I’m getting real tired of feeling like I need to start running every time I see one of you. To be honest, sitting here right now even is making me antsy.”

Overhead, the stars continued on their paths in silence, and somewhere in the village a couple of sheep baa-ed at each other plaintively.

“Well. That’s… something. That’s certainly something, isn’t it.” Cleo was quiet for a moment, examining him. Impulse looked away, suddenly finding his fingernails deeply interesting.

“Impulse.”

She reached out and laid a hand on his arm, and he instinctively flinched away. Cleo raised both eyebrows at him this time, pulling her hand back—then deliberately replacing it, her fingers cool and firm through the thin fabric of his sleeve. “Impulse,” she repeated, her tone gentle but brooking no argument. “You… you know I’m not good at this stuff. But at the risk of getting in way over my pay-grade: we’re good. We’re your friends.” She gave him a shake. “We love you, you idiot. No amount of murdery games on another server gonna change that.”

Impulse gave a little laugh, pretending neither of them could hear the emotion that made his voice catch in his throat. “Wow, Cleo,” he said. “Love. Big word.”

“Bah.” She shoved him away, throwing her hands in the air. “I love everybody, you’re not special.” But there was a grin in her voice. “And anyway—why me? You’ve got a lotta nerve, Impulse, having nightmares about me killin’ you.”

“Hey, you were scary with that crossbow.”

“I was, wasn’t I.” Cleo sounded satisfied about that.

The knot in Impulse’s chest was slowly loosening, and he glanced over to see Cleo leaning back on her hands, staring up at the sky. The faintest tinge of pinkish-grey was starting to appear on the eastern horizon. The Boatem crew would be up and about soon—Grian in particular had a tendency to be up at an ungodly hour of the morning.

“Hey—” Impulse said, lowering his voice again. “Um. Thanks. For swinging by. Sorry for being weird about all this.”

“Impulse if you start apologizing for being weird you’re never going to stop.” She made a face at him. “Because you’re very weird.”

“Thaaaanks.”

Cleo gave him an easy punch on the shoulder. “You know you adore me,” she said. “And if it makes you feel any better, I can promise you this: I will kill you again at some point, I’m sure. And it’ll have nothing at all, whatsoever, to do with Third Life: it’ll be because you deserve it.” She paused. “Or because I just want to.”

Somehow, out of all the things she could have said, a casual threat of violence was the thing that did the trick. Impulse laughed—out loud, for real, a genuine laugh that shook loose the tension in his shoulders and chased away the phantom of Cleo standing over him with a crossbow.

“Thanks, Cleo.”

Cleo stood, and patted him on the head, ruffling up his hair. “There’s the obnoxiously-cheerful Impulse I know and loath,” she teased. “Can’t have you being all maudlin over here—I’m the gloomy one on this server.”

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” Impulse asked, smoothing down his hair and also standing.

She waved a hand dismissively. “Nah. You know me—I don’t do the sleeping thing much. Too much work to do: graves to dig, bodies to—” she grinned darkly “—find. ‘S a lot for an entrepreneuring zombie like myself.”

“Well, I guess I’ll let you get back to it.” Impulse tried to stifle a yawn. He wasn’t entirely successful.

“Go to bed, Impulse,” Cleo laughed, activating her elytra. “And try to only have normal nightmares about me for a while. Ya know—ones where I’m properly zombie-terrifying, not this Crastle nonsense.”

“I’ll do my best.” He watched her fly off, and yawned again, this time wide enough to pop his jaw.

Alright. Let’s try this one more time. Sleep.

He left the roof and reentered his house, which suddenly felt much more cozy and far less empty and cold than it had when he’d first awakened. Sliding back under his blankets, he tugged them up around his ears and closed his eyes with a sigh.

Something exploded outside, and his eyes popped back open.

Maniacal laughter echoed over the hills of Boatem, and Impulse deliberately rolled over, burying his head under the pillow.

Tomorrow’s insanity would come soon enough. For now: sleep.

((sweet dreams, Impulse.))

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Looking for a Place to Happen 4

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape, age gap, general stupidity, some violence and threats, coercion, manipulation, hand job, loss of virginity

This is dark!biker!Sam Wilson x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s lots happening in Birch and you find it all too amusing.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, Little Bones, and Fully Completely

Note: Sorry it took so long to get this out. Hopefully I can work on part 5 now that I have this posted.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 4:  With its gallery gods and its garbage-bag trees

💀💀💀

Sam left you in the same daze that fogged the entire day. The night was restless as you tossed and turned, replaying the scene over and over. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw the lens staring back at you, imagined yourself on a screen, your hand moving between your legs, your pathetic mewls as you came for this man and who knew how many others. 

Well, he did say it was up to you how big the audience was.

You woke early and only checked in with your nan to fill a mug with coffee and start your day ahead of time. You needed to keep yourself busy after a night bombarded by your own thoughts and yet, you couldn’t focus enough to do more than stare at the blinking cursor.

You put on a Twitch stream to keep your mind from wandering too far but it did little to help your focus. You fidgeted, still without your phone, and again thought of the previous day and what you’d done. You’d never done that in front of anyone. You only ever joked about it online, that persona was everything you weren’t irl.

All your stupid online jokes and exaggerations got you into this. You fucked up because the line between virtual and reality was too blurred in your head. You got carried away and now you just had to deal. Well, you guessed it was a lesson no one learned the easy way.

You didn’t realise how much time passed until your stomach growled loudly and squeezed. You felt like throwing up but only had the slice of toast you scarfed down that morning to coat your stomach. You rubbed your eyes and headed downstairs to sneak some of your nan’s sugarless jelly cookies. She hated your snacking but she rarely finished a box on her own.

As you entered through the kitchen, you came to a sudden halt. You tilted your head and frowned as you heard your nan’s voice and the one that answered had you knocking your hip against a chair as you rushed into the living room.

“Just over there,” she directed as the leg of the couch scraped on the floor, “slide it against the wall.”

Sam stood straight dusted off his hands on his jeans. He stepped back and looked over the old floral sofa. 

“Definitely looks better over here,” he remarked.

“What the hell?” you blurted out.

“There you are!” your grandmother tutted, “I called up to you but you do what you always do and tune me out.”

“I didn’t-- I was working, I--” you cleared your throat and looked at Sam, “what are you doing here?”

“He’s being very helpful,” your nan praised, “how many times did I ask you to help me with this thing?”

“Sorry, I…” you swallowed and glanced between them.

“And smell that,” your nan inhaled deeply, “he’s making us dinner.”

“And I brought sugar-free dessert,” he added, “anything else I can do?”

“You’re so sweet,” she squeezed his thick arm.

“So are you… once you get past the frying pan,” he chuckled.

“I see a man in leather, I’m swinging,” she scowled, “you’re lucky you came bearing gifts.”

“Hey, look, we’re not all bad,” he smiled as she sat and he handed her the book from the small table that held the lamp and her ashtray, “I’m not like those guys who threatened your granddaughter.”

“And more honest than her,” she shook her head, “you didn’t tell me you were down at that bar. I warned you-- you really are lucky he was there.”

“Uh, sure, yeah,” you squinted at them, “didn’t you just tell me the other day I should grab any biker by--”

“I’m old, I say things,” she laughed but her eyes had a glimmer of ‘be quiet’.

“Would you like some more tea, Millie?” he asked as he took her empty mug and neared you, stopping in the broad archway that opened up into the living room.

“One more, if you don’t mind,” she smiled sweetly. She never smiled.

You hid a scowl and turned to follow Sam into the kitchen. He moved the kettle onto a burner and turned the knob. He stopped and opened the door of the stove and peeked inside as a blaze of savoury hot air blasted out at him. You felt it just before he let it snap shut and turned to lean on the counter, crossing one foot over the other.

“What are you doing?” you uttered.

“I told you I’d be back,” he shrugged.

“I didn’t think you’d--” you lowered your voice and glanced at the doorway, “what have you been telling her?”

“Everything she wants to hear,” he ran his fingertips along the precise line of hair of his goatee, “and nothing she shouldn’t… but that can change.”

“I did what you wanted. End of punishment,” you put your hands on your hips.

“End? Hmmm, I don’t think I said that,” his forehead wrinkled, “we’re far from finished… and come on, we both know you had as much fun as me.”

Your nostrils flared and you sucked in your cheeks. He was entirely too hard to figure out. He was that sort of man you hated and feared all at once. You just couldn’t predict him.

“I don’t… I don’t care what happens to me, just don’t hurt her,” you said quietly.

“Hurt her? Now why would I do that?” he taunted, “I mean, right now I have no reason to do anything like that.”

You squirmed and let out a breath, “please, alright?”

“Settle down, honey, you’ve been good… so far,” he said, “you just gotta keep it up.”

“Yeah,” you grumbled as the kettle began to shake and he turned his back to you, “any chance I can have my phone back?”

He chuckled as he searched the cupboard for the tea and plucked out a bag, “you’re funny… I like that but you gotta stop acting like everything’s a joke. It doesn’t hold up.”

💀

You found it hard not to wear a look of unamused confusion as Sam served dinner at the table and your grandmother sang his praises as he poured her wine she could actually drink. Just one glass but it was enough to loosen her up. You hadn’t eaten in the dining room since you were a kid, more used to eating at the counter, sitting on the wobbly stools or in front of the television.

Sam offered for you to clean up and do the dishes. Your nan was overjoyed at that, almost mocking. When you finished, you found them in the living room, some old Robert DeNiro movie on the television. You sat on the couch, as far from Sam as you as your grandmother yawned into her hand.

“Well,” she stubbed out her cigarette, “I should really be getting to bed. That wine is kicking in.”

“It’s early…” you argued weakly.

“You kids don’t get into too much trouble,” she warned as she stood with a groan and gripped her hip, “these ears still work.”

“Trouble? Me?” Sam kidded, “you don’t have to worry about me. I haven’t been a kid in a very long time.”

She smiled and nodded but for a moment she hesitated. She looked at you and pushed her tongue to her denture.

“Good night, girlie,” she said.

“Night, nan,” you forced out as normally as you could. 

You knew if she sensed your fear, she’d act out. She was always too brave for her own good and while you admired that, you didn’t need to get hurt because you were dumb as a brick.

She left slowly and you heard her television begin to crackle and the voices of the Law and Order actors were muffled behind her door. You hunched your shoulders and rubbed your hands together as you stared at Deniro’s wrinkled forehead and that characteristic squint. 

The lamp went out as Sam pulled the cord and the screen glowed in the dark. You felt the cushion dip as he shifted closer without subtlety. He slung his arm over your shoulder and you smelled his earthy cologne as he turned the TV up a few ticks. He pulled you to him as his hand came up to cradle your cheek.

“Shouldn’t we go… somewhere else?”

“She won’t hear us honey,” he cooed, “you just gotta be good. Be quiet.”

“Let’s go upstairs. Please,” you grabbed his hand as you pleaded.

“You keep arguing and I’ll make sure to wake her up,” he warned, “now,” he twisted so that he had your wrist in his grasp and forced it down to his lap, “put your hand down my pants.”

You gulped loudly and your hand trembled. You read enough fanfic to know what to do but your lack of actual experience had you nervous. Much like many things in your life. All talk, no skill.

You turned awkwardly on the cushion, your body uncomfortably contorted as his legs stayed pressed to yours. You struggled to unhook the button of his fly and the zipper was slow to descend. You felt the bulge as your hands moved against the denim and you hesitated as your fingers pressed to the elastic of his briefs.

“Mmm,” he purred as he hugged you closer, “that’s it, honey.”

Your eyes widened and you were happy the room was dark enough to hide your face. You pulled the elastic back with two fingers and shoved your other hand blindly beneath the fabric. You brushed against his hard dick and angled your hand so that you could grip him, his smooth length felt peculiar against your palm. Was he big? He felt big but didn’t have anyone to compare him to.

“Tighter,” he groaned at the friction as you moved your hand.

You squeezed and his hot breath grazed over your hair and he pushed his head back over the couch. He twitched as you kept a steady motion, trapped in the limbo of mortification and cluelessness. Were you doing it right? What were you even doing?

“Ah, honey, you’re so good,” he said as he rubbed the back of your neck, “goddamn.”

You said nothing as you focused on your hand. He snaked his arm under yours suddenly and pulled you over as he lifted his ass. Your hand was caught in his under as he laid you down beneath him. He reached down and fixed your grip on him as he held hovered atop you, his knees pressed into the cushion between your legs.

His arm crossed under yours as he poked along your jeans and shoved his hand beneath the denim and cotton. His palm was flush to your pelvis as he slid two fingers along your folds, held snug to you by the fabric. He swirled his fingertips over your bud and you gasped as your other hand gripped his arm in surprise.

“Honey, you’re wet already,” he whispered, “you sure you haven’t been waiting for this?”

You moaned as he pushed back along your entrance and dragged his fingers back, spreading your wetness over your clit. You quivered as you struggled to keep your own hand moving. He inhaled and groaned as played with you and pressed his lips to your cheek. He trailed up to your lips and kissed you, forcing his tongue inside as he shuddered.

He drew away with a sloppy noise and withdrew his hand from your pants. He sat up on his knees and pulled your legs to rest against his torso. He gripped the back of your jeans and yanked them down along with your panties. You smothered your cry as you were shocked by the force of it and the air of the room on your bare ass and legs.

He let your jeans dangle from one ankle as he bent over you again. Your leg fell over the edge of the couch as he held himself over you with a hand just above your head, fingers tight on the cushioned arm. He wiggled as he shimmied his jeans and briefs down with his other hand and you pressed on his chest.

“Wait, wait,” you hissed, “you… please, just… slow down… I never--”

“Shh, honey, you’re making too much noise,” he muttered, “it’s okay.”

“No, no, please, can’t we--” your voice caught as he lined his tips up along your cunt and rubbed it along your clit, “I’ll… I’ll use my mouth.”

“Later,” he whispered as his tip slipped down along your entrance, “honey, I need to feel you.”

“Pl--” your voice evaporated as the head of his dick stretched you.

You whimpered as he brought his arm down and nestled it under your head. He pushed further in and you gritted your teeth as you whined at the pressure of his intrusion. With each inch, the strain grew worse as a deep pain flooded your body. He shushed you as he forced past your resistance.

He covered your mouth as you cried out and barely kept your voice under control. He kept your head on his arm as his other hand cupped your lips and smothered out your agony. He forced himself in as deep as he could and your body tensed as your walls squeezed him. Your eyes rolled back as tears welled and spilled over the corners.

“Honey, it’s okay, we’ll go slow,” he coaxed, “just like that.”

He rocked his hips carefully but it still felt terrible. He pulled back and slid back in, each time it felt like he got even deeper than the last. His breath hitched and your own grew laboured as you huffed through your nostrils. 

He growled and sped up, just a little at a time, your cunt slickening his intrusion as his pelvis brushed against your clit and sent tendrils down your thighs. Even so, the pleasure was not enough to mute the pain.

“That’s it,” he uttered, “that’s it.”

He fucked you faster and the couch shook beneath you. His flesh slapped and the noise seemed to be monstrous, so much sure that you were sure your grandmother would come out and catch you. 

You grasped his wrist as you felt your climax rising. You squeezed and arched your foot as you were overcome and crashed down harshly as the pain tore through the ecstasy once more. He turned his hand and framed your chin as he kissed you again, swallowing your murmurs as he thrust into you over and over.

He lifted his head and dipped his thumb into your mouth as he held in his voice. He quaked and his motion stuttered but kept on. You felt his release, hot and wet, inside of you, a strange sensation that made you both sickened and aroused you.

He eased up and stilled at last. He brushed his nose against yours and chuckled under his breath as he wiggled his hips and you swore at the way it made your walls squeeze him. You blinked as your vision cleared of tears and the darkness. His features were blue with the light of the television, sinister and shadowy.

You went limp under him and breathed out slowly. You shook as he ran his thumb along your bottom lip and left a line of spit down your jaw.

“We’ll have to get that on tape next time,” he said, “but I doubt you’ll forget that, honey.”

[teenyweenynightghost]

for your Spooktober🎃

I like your idea with emojis/words/photos. it's really cool. (while I was looking for pics I get a Halloween mood and changed lockscreen. this is a great achievement for me😅 so thanks)

The challenge

These picture gave me an idea as SooN AS I SAW THEM.

The soft tunes of Hozier were filling the kitchen, a cold, eerie breeze blowing around. Y/n’s silk skirt was easily moved by the wind, revealing her colorful tights. She had knitted them herself, and was very proud.

The sweet scent of pumpkin and cinnamon made its way down the hallway, to the bedroom. It didn’t take much for Thomas to be awoken.

The room was dark, the air stuffy, as it had been occupied for more than 12 hours. If there was anything Thomas could do better than play the guitar, it was sleeping.

A small ball of fur slid out from beneath the sheats, making its way to the pillows.

“A vafanculo-“

The boy choked, seemingly unaware that Ombra had cuddled against his face.

“Oh you little bat…”

Picking up the kitten, he brought it close to his chest and tried falling asleep again.

“Meow”

“Ste zitto.”

“Meeeooowww”

“Ombra.”

“MEEEOOOWWW”

“ALRIGHT!”

The loud screams startled Y/n, who was just about to draw some whiskers on a cookie.

“Thomas, sweetheart, are you alright?” She called out, already sure of what had happened.

Low and behold, a small fluff exited the room, walking proudly towards her, and rubbing against her legs.

“Oh kitten…”

Not long after came her boyfriend too. She would be lying is she said that his post wake up look was the best. Hair all fluffy and disheveld, his cheeks tinted red, eyes half closed.

He looked soft, at peace. Well maybe, considering his wake up alarm, Ombra, a bit grumpy too. But that only made it better.

“Good morning, my love. Did you sleep well?”

Thomas only grunted in response and knelt down beneath Y/n, hugging her torso and burrying his face in her belly.

“Eat cookies.”

“What?”

“Soft.”

Y/n looked down at him, puzzled, until it dawned on her. She burst out laughing, keeling down with Thomas. His cheeks had turned even redder and a sheepish smile was now plastered on his face.

“Easy maths. Softer belly, softer pillow.”

“Oh you baby.”

Thomas took that opportunity to lean over and cuddle into Y/n, closing his eyes-

“Get. Up.”

“But-“

“No buts.”

A long silence engulfed the room.

“Not even yours?”

“It was on the table before but now no<3.”

“NOOOO”

Y/n walked away, a smirk on her face, and continued to decorate her cookies, with the lovely sound of acoustic guitar and a whining Thomas in the background.

“No! Please! This is a mistake ! A cruel punishment! For a crime I didn’t commit!”

“Oh the wings turned out symmetrical!”
”Y/n!” Thomas exclaimed.

“Yes bitch.”

“You know what. No.”

Y/n watched Thomas pick up his little sweetheart, which he had begged Y/n to adopt weeks ago. She couldn’t lie, Thommy and Ombra always managed to melt her heart, and she loved them both beyond reason.

***

A few hours had passed. It was dead silent.

“Oh this fuckers are up to something.” Y/n whispered underneath her breath.

Taking off her apron swiftly, dusting off the flour, Y/n all but ran down the hallway, stoping in front of the door to catch her breath.

She opened it as slowly as she could, peeking her head through.

“Let’s see, Ombra. Is mommy gonna give us kisses today?”

The boy whispered to his fellow kitten. He had somehow found some mini bat wings and tied them to the cat’s back. A paw was extended on a cursor, Thomas’s large hand holding it there, as they moved around on a Ouija board.

Y/n scoffed loudly, making Thomas turn towards her.

“Oh look. The one in question. So will she?” He asked once more, turning back to the board.

“You’re so desperate.”

“If my memory serves me well, you have praised me for that in the past.”

Y/n rolled her eyes, but opted for taking a seat behind him. She wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him back so he was resting peacefully against her.

“You didn’t even try my cookies.”

“Im sorry.”

“No you’re not. You’re grinning like an asshole!”

Thomas erupted in laughter, turning around, laying face down on her thighs.

“I swear I’ll eat them. If you feed them to me, that is.”
“Oh how you love it when I baby you.”

The couple chuckled, eventually falling into a comfortable silence. Y/n motioned for Thomas to come closer, who happily obliged. Burying his face into her shirt, he swore he had reached Heaven.

A strong cinnamon smell was seemingly stuck to her, her warm embrace making him feel like a baked good.

“You’re napping again?” Y/n eventually murmured, brushing her soft hands through his tangles.

“Just enjoying the moment.”

Taglist: @fuckim-so-gay @ginny-lily @messyhairday-me @cheese-toastie-11 @wannabemarlenabutiscoraline @simp-per-ethan @maneskinrollercoaster @juststalking @superchrystaldrug @immrbrightsideeee @shehaddreamstoo @tiaamberxx @victoriadeangeliswifey @bidet-and-legolas @makapaka11 @electra-phoebe @makeavvish @perfectlyunbiasedobservation @cucciolafaerie @theimpossiblehologramtree @unitersmoonshine @deeavjbes @selenophiliaxx

[blu-joons]

Introducing Your Baby To The Fans On V Live ~ Kim Namjoon

His eyes lit up as soon as you carried your daughter into the living room, taking a seat on the chair that Namjoon had pulled up beside him for you to sit on. He leant forwards, adjusting the camera one final time before clicking on the button that sent him life, quickly watching as the viewer count grew.

“Hey everyone,” he smiled, waving to the camera. “I thought I’d come and introduce you all properly to the new member of our family we welcomed.”

“Say hello,” you giggled, lifting your daughter up to make sure she was in shot. She slept peacefully in your arms, unaware of the thousands of people that were getting their first glimpse of your daughter, filling the comments with plenty of lovely comments at how cute she was.

Your pregnancy had been something the two of you kept secret until you gave birth to your little girl. Namjoon was very wary and protective of something happening, knowing that the fans would understand his decision to put his family first.

“She’s met our friends, our families, and all of the boys, so I thought there was only one more important group of people that she needed to meet, the fans,” Namjoon smiled, unable to hide the smile on his face that had been there since the moment your daughter was born.

“It’s a bit rude of her to sleep through her introduction though.”

You watched closely as Namjoon moved his hand to brush over the top of her head, carefully watching the slow rise and fall of her chest. Each time he watched her he felt his heartbeat quicken, even if she was doing next to nothing back at him.

Namjoon turned back to the computer as questions from the fans started to come in. “Have you guys got a name?” He read out. “We’ve come up with a name, but we’re not going to announce it just yet until we’ve registered the birth.”

“That was one of the things we argued the most about whilst I was pregnant,” you added, nudging Namjoon’s arm lightly. “We both had very different names that we were desperate to use.”

“But luckily in the end we managed to find a compromise,” Namjoon clarified, resting his thumb against your daughter’s hand. “Now that she’s here, I think it’s a name that fits her perfectly, when you guys hear it, you’ll see exactly what I mean.”

You sat back whilst Namjoon read through a few more questions, happily telling the fans about your pregnancy in as much detail as possible. He was a proud father, something the fans very quickly picked up on.

“Someone’s asked about the baby shoes,” you pointed out to them, “are they here?”

Namjoon’s eyes lit up as he remembered the small shoes he’d purchased and shown on his live before. “They were one of the first things I put in the nursery to make sure they were passed on.”

“They took pride of place in the wardrobe,” you told them all, rolling your eyes at the excitement on his face. “I don’t know how long it will be until she wears them, but I’m sure Namjoon will share a photo with you all when he does.”

What the fans didn’t know was the box of other things he’d bought before you even found out you were pregnant for your future child. “As soon as her feet fit in those shoes, I’ll make sure she wears them every day.”

“They’re not exactly a colour that will go with every outfit,” you reminded Namjoon, but his shoulders only shrugged.

“I’ll make it work; don’t you worry about that.”

“I’m telling you now, I’m not letting you dress our daughter, that’s my job, definitely.”

The two of you were interrupted by the wriggle of your daughter as her eyes fluttered open. Namjoon quickly took her from you so that the fans could see her awake for the first time, making sure to point out all the little details on her face that he’d fallen in love with, especially the prominent dimples in her cheeks.

“She’s got Y/N’s eyes,” he informed them all, pouting down at her as she stared up at him. “But I like to think that she’s got my smile, the dimples are definitely like mine, they align perfectly with her mouth, just like mine do.”

“Hopefully, she’s got your brains, that’s the most important quality she needs from you.”

Namjoon’s head shook as a tiny yawn came from her, poking her tongue out as she did so. “I can’t get enough of her, I just stare at her constantly, even when she’s fast asleep. I can’t wait for you all to watch her grow up, I’ll document it all for you guys.”

Once your daughter settled again, this time in Namjoon’s arms, the two of you answered a few more questions. Having left them in the unknown for nine months, you knew there would be plenty of questions coming your way, which you were more than happy to answer. With her next feed impending, after an hour, Namjoon finally brought the live to an end.

“We’ve got parent duties to get back to, but we’ll try and give you guys another update soon.”

“I’m sure you’ll see plenty of photos before we come live again, all the boys are constantly picturing her,” you told them all.

“She can’t help being so photogenic,” Namjoon joked, “she must really take after her father to have such a face as adorable as she does.”

Your head shook as many of the fans quickly came to your defence, shutting Namjoon down. He couldn’t believe so many of his fans had turned against him, refusing to look at the smug smile that was plastered across your face.

“See you guys soon,” Namjoon smiled, moving the cursor to end the live stream, shutting down his laptop once he was sure that everything was cut off.

As soon as everything was closed down, he raised your daughter in the air, blowing several raspberries against her tummy to bring a wide smile to her face.

“The fans seemed to enjoy getting to meet her,” you smiled, “I was so worried they’d be upset that we kept the fact we were having a baby for so long. But her cute face must’ve convinced them they shouldn’t be mad at us.”

“There’s no way they could have been upset for long, if we keep doing lives, any fans who were disappointed will soon forget about it.”

“They’ll be nice for us to look back on too.”

His head slowly nodded, standing up from the computer to head into the kitchen to sort your daughter out for her next feed. “I never expected them to ask as many questions as they did.”

“The fans like to know every single detail of our lives, that won’t change, even with this little one,” he pointed out to you.

“There are certainly some details that we should keep to ourselves,” you reminded him, following behind him.

“You don’t need to worry, I’ll look after you both,” he smiled.

“I know you will.”

---

Masterlist

[stardusttrashed]

Lovestruck (2)

Part 1

Part 3

Pairing: Professor Erwin x Fem! Reader

Word Count: 4K

“Are you up?” You scrunched your face up at the question. “Sorry, stupid question.” You weren’t sure why you were so nervous right now. You had spoken to Erwin plenty of times before. Hell, you spent nearly every day on the phone with him. If it wasn’t a ‘good morning’ call, it was a ‘good night’ call, or even him just calling in between classes. Yet here you were, jumbling over your words nervously. “I, uh, what I meant to say was, did I wake you?”

You looked down at the annoyingly blank document on your screen. The blinking cursor on the white screen seemed to be mocking you. It was a steady reminder of what you should be doing. All you could hope was that Erwin would be able to rid you of your writer's block in some way, even if it was just his voice.

You could hear a quiet amused sound from the other side of the phone. “N-no, you’re fine, I promise,” he reassured you. His voice was huskier than usual, laced with unmistakable tiredness. “Someone already beat you to the punch,” Erwin joked. His chuckle quickly died out as a quiet ‘oh’ fell from your lips. 

Erwin cleared his throat worriedly, “I’m glad you called, actually. I was going to ask for your help.”

You glanced at the clock on your laptop. “You want my help? At two in the morning,” you thought aloud, processing what was going on. Sure, you were calling to ask the same, but. Well, you had no ‘but’s right now. “Kinda sounds like a booty call to me.”

“Were you not doing the same,” Erwin asked teasingly. You could hear the smile in his honeyed tone. “It’s not a booty call,” Erwin reassured you when he got nothing but a laugh. “Unless you want it to be,” he trailed off in uncertainty, unsure if he was stepping over a line.

“You wish, Erwin. What happened to taking things slow?”

“What better way to give you that demonstration you wanted?”

You laughed and shook your head. It was easier just to assume he was teasing than face your feelings right now. “What do you need help with, Erwin,” you chuckled.

“It’d probably be easier if you just came over. And yes, I know this is sounding more and more like a booty call, but I swear it isn’t.”

“Whatever you say, Smith.” You shook your head as you fought back an amused smirk. “I’ll be there in a bit.”

Erwin smiled like a kid in a candy store, “I’ll send you the address.” You hung up with a playful ‘yeah, yeah, yeah.’ His eyes scanned the room, making sure everything was spick and span. He wanted to make sure everything was perfect. But more than anything else, he wanted to make sure you were comfortable. 

You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror, your mind racing a mile a minute. You weren’t sure what to wear- because your t-shirt and panties weren’t an option. Well, they could be. You groaned and walked over to your dresser. You wanted to be comfortable, but all your shorts left little to the imagination. And you could wear sweatpants, but sweats weren’t always the sexiest thing. You let out a sound that was a mixture between a scoff and a laugh. It was ridiculous how much you were stressing over going to his house. He was your friend, for crying out loud. He probably didn’t even really care.

Erwin leaned against the bathroom counter, getting closer to the mirror. He ran the brush over his hair for probably the tenth time in the past couple of minutes. His thundering heart and shaking hands made it nearly impossible to get his part right. A frustrated sigh left his lips as he set the brush down. He couldn’t for the life of him figure out why he was making such a big deal about this. Sure, it was the first time you were coming over, and he wanted to impress you. But who has their shit together at two in the morning? 

“What do you think, princess? Should I brush my hair or go for a messy-casual look?”

You pulled on a pair of grey sweatpants before your nerves told you to change again. “It’s just Erwin,” you quietly reassured yourself. You walked through your room, gathering the numerous pieces of clothes strewn about the place, “just Erwin Mr. Perfect Smith. No need to fret,” you folded each item before putting them in their proper place. “Just two friends helping each other out, non sexually, at two in the morning,” you continued with an uncertain tone as you walked past your bathroom. You stopped in your tracks, backpedaling towards the room you just passed to grab a toothbrush and some deodorant. You tossed them into a bag along with your laptop.

Erwin: Here’s the address, call me if you get lost :)

Erwin: Can’t wait for you to meet Sina

You stared at your phone in disbelief, your hand falling slack against the doorknob. Your feet felt like bricks, holding you in place as you read the short sentence repeatedly. Who was Sina? More importantly, why did it bother you so much? He’s just a friend, nothing more. Who cared if he had a girl? You were only coming over to help. 

With a weary sigh, you pulled yourself out of your daze, walking out the door and into the cool early morning air. The faint smell of rain hung in the air as you drove further and further out of the city. Streetlights were replaced with dense trees, leaving nothing but the moonlight and your headlights to lead the way. Your mind drifted back to Erwin’s text in an attempt to busy itself. You tried picturing what she might look like, whether she had long or short hair, her height, how perfect she’d look on Erwin’s arm. What would you even say to her? 

You pushed down the thought, feeling yourself get more and more anxious with every new conspiracy theory-like idea of who Sina could be. “Just friends,” you breathed quietly as you parked your car. 

Quiet knocking sounded through the house, sending both Erwin and Sina on high alert. Erwin stood frozen in place while his mind raced with his heart as if they were trying to see which would drive him crazy faster. Heart thundering in his chest, he forces himself to walk towards the front door, Sina following behind on his heels. 

You raised your finger to ring the doorbell, stopping short as the door opened to reveal Erwin. You stared at him, jaw slack and mouth slightly agape as you admired the man in front of you. His hair was casually messy except for a few stubborn strands. It was as if his hair was gelled down, and someone tried to ruffle it to avail.  “I was beginning to think you fell asleep,” you teased as you crossed your arms over your chest. 

“And miss seeing you,” Erwin chuckled and shook his head. “Of course-,” he was interrupted by the door opening wider, Sina squeezing her way towards you. 

A gasp escaped your lips as you felt repeated nudging against your shin. Your eyes fell to the ground, landing an overly excited Shiba Inu puppy. “Hi there, cutie,” you cooed, scooping it up into your arms. Giggles spilled from your lips as the puppy squirmed in your arms, desperately trying to cover every bit of you in kisses. 

Erwin watched you with adoring eyes for a moment, a dopey smile spreading across his face. He could watch you for hours, intoxicated by everything about you. Your smile made his heart stop and sent it into overdrive all at the same time as if he was on a rollercoaster. “I’m glad you two are getting along. Y/n, meet my new little princess, Sina.”

“S-Sina,” You repeated after him, hoping you didn’t look as shocked as you actually were. “She’s… she’s Sina? So when you said someone had beat me to the…. gotcha.” Erwin raised an eyebrow at you, sending you a knowing smirk. “I just mean, well, I just- it’s a cute name.” You let out a quiet sigh of relief, “it fits her.” You turned your attention to Sina, who had snuggled herself into the crook of your arm. 

Erwin made an amused sound and muttered quietly to himself, “you’re something else.”

“Hmm. What was that?”

“I, well,” Erwin scratched the back of his neck embarrassedly. “I was trying to figure out if you came all this way just to stand outside.”

You pushed your tongue against the inside of your cheek with a playful scoff. “It’s a little hard to come inside when there’s a brick wall in the way?”

“A brick wall, eh?” Erwin leaned against the doorframe not so casually, lifting his arm above his head and his shirt along with it. “First a Greek god, then a brick wall, huh?”

Your eyes drifted down his form, slowly taking all of him in before landing on the glimpse of skin above his waistband. You wanted to run your fingers along his prominent v-line, tracing it lower and-. Erwin cleared his throat, pulling you out of your thoughts. You closed your eyes with a bashful smile tugging on your lips, “are you going to stop being a pain in the ass and invite me in sometime soon?” You opened your eyes to meet his unwavering gaze. “Or I can just leave with Sina.”

“Wouldn’t be the first thing you’ve taken from me,” Erwin muttered as he moved aside, allowing you to step inside. His pulse quickened as you walked past him, Sina still tucked away in your arms as if she belonged there. “D-do you want anything to drink or eat,” he questioned as he closed and locked the door behind you. 

“Water is fine, thank you.” You gently set Sina down on the mahogany floor, watching her return to a ball of energy as she was before- bounding happily over to Erwin. “It’s a nice murder house you have here,” you called after him as he walked towards what you presumed to be the kitchen. Erwin’s laughter echoed down the hall, filling you with a surge of giddy warmth. Your eyes wandered around, subconsciously scanning for pictures.

“It’s not a murder house,” Erwin laughed with a playful eye-roll. “It’s just peaceful, makes it easy to find inspiration.” 

“Yeah, sure, that’s what all the murderers say.” You strolled down the hall, taking in the cozy interior while continuing your search for pictures. 

“You’re not going to find anything,” Erwin spoke, his breath tickling your ear. 

“What? I wasn’t- what are you talking about?” You kept your eyes on the wall in front of you, refusing to turn around and face him. Heat rose to your cheeks as if you were standing in front of a fire. 

“I don’t have a girlfriend.”

You whipped around before you could stop yourself, nearly knocking over the cup in his hand. “I wasn’t going to-.” Was it really that obvious what you were doing? Your breaths grew shorter and shorter as you grew anxious. 

“You didn’t have to. Your reaction to Sina was enough.” Erwin stared at you gently as he mulled over his own thoughts. Was it mere curiosity, or did you… do you feel the same way about him as he does for you? He opened his mouth to say something, but no words could come out. No words felt right. He wasn’t sure if he should just outright say how he felt, too afraid of scaring you off. “Y/n-,” Sina’s frustrated yips stopped his words in their tracks. “... what did you need help with?” Erwin watched the hopeful look in your eyes diminish.

“Ah,” you gasped, pulled out of your dream-like daze that his blue eyes put you under. “I needed some writing inspiration… what did you need help with?” You plucked the cup from his hand, taking a sip. 

I wanted an excuse to see you. His brain froze like a deer in headlights, leaving him staring at you like a complete idiot. Erwin’s eyes flitted down to your lips. I needed to be beside you. “I,” he trailed off as his cheeks were painted a pale shade of pink. “I wanted you to meet Sina.”

You raised an eyebrow challengingly, “at two in the morning?” You immediately bit the inside of your cheek in regret. 

Erwin’s eyes fell to Sina at his feet, watching as she pawed at his legs in desperation for attention. The warmth radiating from your body was becoming unbearable. You were so close, yet it felt almost illegal to touch you. 

“Well, I’m glad you did.” You lowered down into a squat, grabbing Sina’s attention. A soft smile graced your face as the puppy climbed into your lap like a jungle gym. 

He took the cup from your hand before setting it down on a table. Why was it so hard for him to talk right now?  He was thankful you were too busy playing with Sina to notice him struggling to come up with something to say. A few moments passed before he finally opened his mouth to say, “I wanna show you something,”  An awkward silence covered both of you as he slowly led you throughout the house. No amount of deep breaths seemed to calm Erwin enough to get him to be confident enough to form coherent sentences. He was too aware of your presence beside him. Too aware of the look of awe on your face as you took in each new room until you stopped at a room composed mostly of windows that gave a perfect view of the lake a few meters away. 

“This is where I get most of my writing done,” he admitted as he turned on the fairy lights hanging above them. “Or out there,” he nodded towards the hammock swaying the breeze right over a shallow part of the lake.

“So Mr. Smith’s murder house turns out to be a lake house as well. How convenient.” You turned to him with a playful smirk, basking in the way the corners of his eyes crinkled in amusement. “In all seriousness though, it’s beautiful- all of it,” you gestured to the house around you.

“You’re free to come whenever you want,” Erwin blurted before he could catch himself. He opened his mouth to protest as your eyes widened, but you beat him to the punch. 

“I’d like that… a lot.” You could picture it already. You could see you and Erwin living a happy domestic life together, spending early mornings in the hammock with him and Sina, watching the sunrise. But you were getting ahead of yourself- he’s nothing but a friend after all. You quickly averted your gaze out of embarrassment. “Mind if I play music while I write,” you asked as you plopped down on a bench with your laptop in hand.

“Whatever makes you comfortable.” Erwin followed behind you, oblivious to your sudden embarrassment, sitting beside you. 

Sina wasted no time, slipping between the small space left between yours and Erwin’s thigh. It was a snug fit that left her in a cubby of warmth that quickly lulled her to sleep. 

You stifled your third yawn in the past minute, determined to get some of your thought on the god-forsaken document. The ideas were finally flowing, revived by the serene sight in front of you. Or maybe it was by the muscular blonde beside you that couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off of you for more than a second. “It’s kinda hard to focus when you keep staring.” You glanced at him through the corner of your eye with a smug smile to let him know you were teasing. 

“Not my fault you look gorgeous,” Erwin breathed absentmindedly. He couldn’t get enough of you, his eyes drinking you in like a man in the desert. He wanted to memorize how you looked. He tried to ingrain into his mind the feeling of having, if nothing else, this one domestic moment with you. The love songs streaming from your phone only helped make the picture that much more vivid in his mind. You were perfect.

“Wha-?” You whipped your head to look at him, “what did you say?” 

“N-nothing!”

You sighed disappointedly and nodded, “sorry, I thought you said something.” You shifted uncomfortably as the awkward silence returned. Hesitantly you turned back to your laptop to finish working on the little bit of story you managed to snuff out of your inspiration. The words on the screen blurred together, jumbling together into nonsense. Too much of your brain was focused on missing the feeling of Erwin’s gaze to attempt to refocus. You looked down at the time with a sigh. 4 a.m. 

“I should get going,” you broke the silence as you rose to your feet. “It’s late-,” you stifled a yawn, “and I’m sure you’re probably tired by now.” 

“Stay?” Erwin followed your lead and rose to his feet as well, “like you said, it’s late. And your eyes are barely open.” He let out a heart-melting chuckle. “Stay and leave when you wake up.” He searched your eyes as he gave you time to think it over. “I’ll even sleep on the couch,” he continued when you opened your mouth with a frown pressed in over your expressions. “You and Sina can have my bed.”

“I’m not going to make you sleep on the couch in your own house.”

“You’re not making me do anything.” 

You chewed onto the inside of your cheek as you mulled it over. He was right. Your eyes felt like they weighed tons which meant driving probably wasn’t the safest option. The butterflies in your stomach, on the other hand, were wide awake and quickly spreading through your body. “Okay.” 

Erwin let out a breath he hadn’t even realized he had been holding, “okay?” His lips cracked into an uncertain smile. 

You rolled your eyes, a quiet giggle falling from your lips. “That’s what I said, isn’t it?” You gave his shoulder a gentle nudge, leaving your hand there longer than necessary, “you aren’t changing your mind are you?” 

Erwin caught your hand with ease, gently holding it in place against his shoulder. “About you?” Erwin looked at you like it might’ve been the last time he got the chance. “Never.” He kept his hand clasped around your, noting to himself how perfectly your hand seemed to fit in his. 

You laughed nervously, “even if I ask to borrow some shorts for the night?” 

“Especially then.” Erwin smiled shyly, feeling his hand grow slightly clammy. He loosened his grip on your hand, “come on.” 

In a moment of panic, you quickly grasped onto his hand, holding onto it despite the increasing clamminess from both of your hands. A surge of regret washed over you as you felt his hand stiffen. “S-sorry,” you gasped, preparing to release his hand. Erwin’s eyes never left your own-- despite the worry and hesitance they held-- as he laced his fingers with yours. Your eyes flitted down to your interlocked hand, a small smile finding its way on your lips. “Ah, lead the way, Smith.”

Erwin scooped Sina into his free hand with ease before leading you to his bedroom. Every step towards the room felt like a shot of adrenaline straight to the heart, filling him with giddy excitement. He would’ve felt embarrassed or childish in any other situation, but he could’ve sworn he could feel the same excitement radiating off of you. 

Erwin reluctantly released your hand once the both of you walked into his room. “Shorts are in the dresser over there,” Erwin nodded to the opposite corner of the room as he laid Sina in her bed. “I’ll- uh, go ahead and go lay down on the couch. Make yourself comfortable.” 

You nodded as you dug through his drawer, grabbing the first pair of shorts you saw. Something felt wrong. Like something was missing. You changed in the bathroom, and by the time you came back out, he was already out of the room. A heavy sigh left your lips as your mind jumped from one thought to another like a child playing the floor is lava. Sure, Erwin was just a friend, but is that really all you wanted him to be? Either way, friends can sleep in the same bed without it being weird. Right? 

“Erwin,” you spoke softly as you walked out to the hall. Erwin stood at the end of it, his hand resting on the light switch. You waited until he turned to look at you, your breath hitching in your throat at the sight of his bright blue eyes. “Come lay with us? I feel bad making you sleep on the couch and, well, erm, Sina wants you.”

Erwin’s chuckle rumbled in his chest as he raised an eyebrow. “Sina wants me?” You nodded shyly, your eyes wavering as if there was more you wanted to say. It was an answer enough for him to turn off the light and walk towards you, the bedroom light guiding him. He stopped in front of you, towering over you, “Just Sina?” He didn’t know what had gotten ahold of him.

Your voice caught in your throat, leaving you gaping like a fish. You let out a heavy sigh, your shoulders raising and dropping, as you gathered yourself. “I… I want you.” Erwin quirks a grin at your words, and you could’ve sworn you saw his shoulders relax.

Erwin pulled you closer by the waist, mischief twinkling in his eyes as he lowered his voice to a soft murmur, “say it again.” 

“Erwin, I want you,” you coo as you press yourself closer, leaving barely enough room for a breath. 

“I want you too.” His grip around your waist tightens momentarily. The look in his eyes was one you’ve never seen before, one filled with an insatiable hunger. “God, I’ve wanted you longer than you know.” He leaned forward to rest his forehead against yours, your noses brushing against each other. His breath fanned over your lips, but he couldn’t bring himself to take the next step. This all felt like too much of a dream to do so. He was so close, yet fear gripped him and held him impossibly still. It took everything in his power not to claim you, to press his lips against yours like he’s wanted to for so long. “I want…” 

“No offense Erwin, but shut up,” you chuckled, “taking it slow sucks.” You softly pressed your lips against his. Erwin responds instantly, consuming you completely with sudden passion, his lips bruising against yours. Desire for each other takes every thought until you both are nothing more than a body, yearning to touch and be touched. 

Erwin smiled against your lips. You were sending him to cloud nine, and as much as he loved it, he wasn’t sure how much more he could take. When he breaks the kiss, he looks almost dizzy, pausing a moment to catch a breath and look you over before speaking. “I’ll have to agree with you on that,” he breathed, his voice barely above a whisper. “But it made the moment all the more savorable.” Without warning, Erwin lifted you- one hand holding you steady while the other guided your legs to wrap around his waist. “And I’m not done savoring it yet.”

tags: @mandyvc @iaru​  @korianrdr 

[lustbile-archive]

Wanna Watch?

YangyangxReader

Word Count: 3.2k

Summary/Warning: Smut. Yangyang swears that tentacles are hot, just watch one video with him and you’ll see. He promises.… this was supposed to be a blurb but then I got very carried away. and because of that it might be a little rambley at some parts im so sorry

Requested

You’d be the first to admit that you and Yangyang had a weird friendship. Your other friends had clocked it, saying that even for best friends, you were way too open with each other.

And they weren’t technically wrong. Something about being around Yangyang deleted your filter, made you say shit that you never thought you’d say to another human being, but in your defense, he was exactly the same way.

It started with a few dirty jokes. It wasn’t anything serious or any different than ones you’d say with or without each other, but you two did encourage each other. It was as if anything one of you said, the other had something to add. It didn’t take long for things to begin to spiral and for your friends to decide that you two together were lethal.

After that day it was like you were attached at the hip. Something about your shared vulgarness made you click and it wasn’t very long after until it went a little far.

It was the first time you stayed over at his place, a bottle of liquor tucked in your bag. Tipsy off a half a bottle each, you both let it slip what turned you on the most. It wasn’t weird at the time, but the next morning there was a tension there.

That tension eventually faded, leading to another sleep over. And another. And another. Each of them somehow leading to some form of sexual conversation.

But the one that happened tonight was different.

Some joke about porn was made. You two sat side by side in your own chairs as you watched him play some game you quickly forgot the name of, and he had deemed it appropriate to mention that it would be kinda hot if the woman he played as were to get fucked by the tentacle monster that she fought.

You started by jokingly scolding him about how, though you weren’t sure exactly in what way, what he said was chauvinistic. But then you followed it with teasing about how he was a weirdo for being into tentacles.

“Oh come on,” he goes on, much louder than he needed to be, “you cannot tell me you’ve never looked at tentacle porn. Not even just because you were curious?”

“What porn I watch is none of your business Yang,” you retort as you push your finger in his face, a bratty giggle bursting from you when he smacks your hand away in irritation.

“So you’re not denying that you’ve seen tentacle porn,” he hums, nodding to himself, “if that’s the case I’m just gonna assume you have.”

You move to retort again, but he quickly interrupts, “actually I’m going to assume that you only watch tentacle porn and it’s something you get off to very often.”

“You think about me getting off a lot Yangyang?” you ask, but you quickly realize maybe the question was a step too far once the words are in the air.

Thankfully, he seems to ignore your question as he suddenly closed his game, the incognito tab he opens immediately after making your mouth run dry.

“How about this,” he starts, his fingers running across the keyboard as he types in the the link to a porn site. You divert your eyes quickly when you see the bars auto fill pop up, the idea of seeing whatever he looked at when he forgot to go incognito making your stomach flip, “let’s just take a little peek and we’ll see who’s right.”

“See who’s right about what?” your voice pitches and your back straightens as you ask.

“About whether or not tentacles are hot,” he turns to you briefly as if he’s explaining a math equation to you, “come on dude keep up.”

“Man I don’t know,” you hesitate, but you quickly notice he already has a video picked out and queued.

“I’m not gonna force you to watch it if you don’t want,” he reassures as he hovers his cursor over the play button, “but I also won’t judge you if you’re curious.”

You gnaw on your bottom lip for a moment as you think, your heart beating faster as the seconds pass, “okay fine just play it before I change my mind.”

And that’s how you got where you are now. You and Yangyang curled into your chairs, eyes wide and curious as a slender woman, with a disproportionately large chest, screams and whines while she’s brutally fucked by a weird tentacle monster.

You feel your face twist in fascination, first at the amount of detail and time that must have went into animating each frame, but then slowly but surely, just how weirdly hot you found yourself finding the video.

Something about the way the multiple tentacles cover her body as they suspend her in the air. One is shoved deep in her mouth, gross gagging noises added as a result, two attached to both of her nipples and another set fucking her open from both holes. It was easily one of the weirdest things you’ve ever seen, but you couldn’t ignore the growing wetness it caused in your underwear.

You try to not let it show in your body language, the idea of Yangyang noticing your arousal and then most likely making fun of you for it making you want to crawl in a hole.

You eyes dart over to him for a moment to try and gauge how he’s feeling. The first thing you notice immediately is the way he curls to block your view of his crotch, the second being the fact that he looks at you as well.

“So… what are you thinking?” he asks slowly.

“I don’t know what are you thinking?” you throw back almost too quickly.

“I… I think you know what I’m thinking,” his words continue to spill out like molasses, his head quickly nodding to the space between his legs with a embarrassed flush to his skin, “I’m asking how you’re feeling.”

“I don’t know,” you double down, your head shaking with a jerk, “I- I don’t know how I’m feeling.”

“It’s okay if you like it-“

“I don’t know if I like it,” you lie, your tone defensive and sharp.

“You do know that you’re not a bad person for liking it right?” He continues to reassure as he tries to keep his patience with you.

You only huff in response, the video still loudly playing as you talk. You try to shift in your seat to create distance between you, but it only makes you aware of how your arousal grows.

“Okay im not gonna lie,” he starts, a joking tone to his voice in the way that tells you he’s trying to ease the tension, “I think it’s hot, but you probably guessed that. I’m just saying I could totallly jack it to this.”

You know it’s a joke, but that doesn’t stop the words from making your face warm and your thighs flex. And even though you try and advert your eyes, you know he is analyzing every move you make.

“Do you maybe…” he trails off as he considers what to say next, “ack, no no it’s weird never mind.”

“What?” you dart up in panic, “is something im doing weird?”

“No no no,” he panics as well, “you’re fine… I was just gonna ask if you... if you maybe wanted to see how much you like it. Like see if you can get off to it?”

It was in this you found out that maybe your friends were right. Maybe you were lethal together, too comfortable and relaxed and willing to do and say the worst in front of each other. If that wasn’t the case there was no way in hell you’d end up where you were now.

If someone had told you that when you first met Yangyang that one night you two would be masturbating to tentacle porn together, you would have told them they lived in a fantasy, that they were just delusional perverts that don’t like people being just friends, but they would have been right.

You felt weirdly eager as you pushed your pajama shorts and underwear to his floor, the air of the room hitting your skin and making you come to the terms of how wet the video had gotten you.

And the fact that Yangyang seemed equally as eager as he pulled himself from the restrains of his sweatpants both put you at ease while putting you incredibly in edge.

You tried to ignore him as he sat next to you. Your eyes taking an iron lock onto his screen as a new video played. It was the same idea, pretty girl with literally any possible hole stuffed with a slimy tentacle getting pleasured in any way possible, the only difference was a slight change in art style.

It took you a moment to get into it, your fingers gently tapping against your clit as you tried to build the courage to touch yourself the same way you do in the safety of your own room, but after one particularly hard thrust from the monster and a desperate cry from the girl, you couldn’t hold back.

Your fingers dipped into your entrance gently as you coated the tips in your arousal, your hips jumping slightly at the friction.

Yangyang tried to ignore you as well, his fist moving slowly as he tried to focus on the scene in front of him, but the way you jerked next to him and the bubbles of noise that slipped unintentionally from your lips, he felt like a starving tiger being tempted with a steak.

You tried to bite your tongue to hold in any moans as your fingers started to roll circles gently on your clit, but with the way you grew wetter and wetter and the rising sensitivity in the bundle of nerves, you couldn’t help the quiet whimpering that rose from you chest.

It wasn’t that you could get off to it, it was actually much easier than you had anticipated. Something about the way the girls in the videos were being stimulated in every way possible had you hot and dripping in your arousal, and maybe your best friend pleasuring himself next to you was making it a million times sexier.

You weren’t alone though. It didn’t take long for Yangyang to lose his internal battle, his eyes straining to his side and his gaming chair rolling back slightly to allow him to watch you from the side. He knew he could crank one out easily to the videos in front of him, he had done it plenty of times before, but if he let the opportunity of watching your chest rise and fall with labored breaths while your fingers moved quickly over your dampened skin pass him by, he’d be kicking himself forever.

He was moving before he could even think, the finger of his free hand working with a mind of his own as they tap gently on the side of your chair. His heart beat sky rockets when you jump, but he only feels himself get harder when he sees it doesn’t stop your rapidly moving hand.

“Say no,” he whispers regardless of his growing need to touch you, “say no cause I cannot ruin this friendship.”

“No offense Yang,” he almost collapses at how winded you sound, but also at the promise that you’re still comfortable enough to shorten his name, “but if what we’re doing now didn’t ruin it, I don’t think anything will.”

“Thank fuck,” he speaks too loudly again as he moves his chair next to yours, his hand brushing against the side of your bare leg as it leans against the arm of your chair, “cause I wanna touch you so bad dude.”

“Hmmmm,” you hum out as his words swirl your brain like a blender, your heart rapidly pumping against your chest. You’d be a liar if you tried to act like the idea didn’t cause a new wave of arousal run over your body. Your answer comes before you can even think of the consequences.

“Please,” the word being your only verbal response before you rip your hand away from your body, your legs falling wider apart as an invitation. Your body jumps in protest as you deny yourself the orgasm that was slowly building, and Yangyang immediately jumps into action to compensate.

The first touch of his fingers is unsure, a hesitation in his muscles as he tries to convince himself that what’s happening is real. He isn’t sure what’s hotter to him in that moment, the way you whimper with a slight pout to your lips when he finally presses his digits to your swollen clit, or the way your eyes remain locked on the animated porn.

He’s battling between the two, when you show him something better. Your hand moves wildly in the air for only a moment, before you're pushing it under his arm. It doesn’t take you much exploring before you find where his hand slowly moves against his length. Your hand swats gently at his in a way that weirdly reminds him of the way you swat at him when he does something he’s not supposed to, and after his brain catches up with your motions, he lets go.

He thinks his heart probably stops when your hand wraps around him, your wrist immediately moving at the same pace as his fingers. His eyes slam shut for a second, a desperate attempt to hold off his orgasm, before they open slightly again.

He tries to do the same as you and keep his eyes trained on the video, and it works a few times, but as you gush and twitch against his unrelentingly moving fingers. He feels like one of his biggest fantasies has come to life in front of him, the whining sound of his name from your lips music to his ears.

You babble and squirm, your orgasm approaching you much faster than it has ever before. There’s something so jarring and new about the video that flashes in front of your eyes, and combining that with your best friend playing you not much differently than he’d played his game not long before made you feel like you were losing your grip on reality.

You’re vaguely aware that your hand flexes around his length, and fear that maybe your hold may be too rough immediately leaving your mind when you hear him let out a pleased groan. The sound also momentarily replaces the fear that filled you from actually looking at the boy that sits next to you, and you feel your head jerking to look at his face scrunched in pleasure.

The wind is knocked from your lungs when your eyes meet his again, neither of your stares faltering like you assumed they would. Instead the eye contact encourages you both, and you feel your hands pick up their pace.

You thank the universe for Yangyang’s reflexes as he finds no trouble in following your antsy jerking hips, his fingers never shifting away from your buzzing clit. He’s also completely unfazed as your thighs clamp around his wrist, and instead his now free hand moves to grab at your knee that’s closest to him, and pull harshly to hold your legs spread.

The angle his body is now turned leaves him leaning on his side, and he shows no hesitation to using the new position to his advantage as he begins thrusting his hips to fuck your fist.

You feel as if there’s another force around you that forces you to stare at one another, your hands and hips becoming frantic as you both inch closer and closer to your finish.

The video had ended moments before, but neither of you move to choose another. Too distracted by the other bodies, both of your breaths pick up right before the point of hyperventilating.

You feel yourself right on the edge, the beginning of your orgasm making your toes curl and your back arch off the back of the chair. Just from the stimulation on your clit, you can feel yourself falling, but when he notices that you’re starting to crumble, his fingers slip down until they push into you making you gasp loudly.

With his middle and ring finger pistoning in you at the same pace as his hips and the heel of his hand digging and rubbing into your clit, you finally start to come. If it wasn’t for his determined pace, your fluttering walls would push him out, but he fights against your body with a deep grunt as he curls the digits to pull against the nerve inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your skull.

With your mouth hanging open, silent moans and squeaking whimpers popping from your throat, he’s sure he stares at a defiled angel. He knew he always found you attractive, even more attractive when you first took his raunchy jokes in stride, but as you come so beautifully around his fingers, he decides you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.

Just watching your come is enough to push him over the edge, but as it makes your muscles tense, your hand flexes and shakes as you hold him. With a few more pulses of his hips, he’s coming with his lip tucked between his teeth and his eyes trained on where you wrap around his fingers, your noise of surprise at the feeling of his come shooting across your hand only making his orgasm stronger.

With shaking legs, he falls back into his chair, his hand pulling from your sensitive skin, and his softening length slipping from your fingers.

Silence falls over the room, the only sound being the angry sound of his computer's fan and your evening breaths. You pull your limbs into your body as you try to get more comfortable in the seat, and as you try to wrap your arms around yourself, you notice the evidence of his orgasm that sticks to the side of your hand.

You’re moving before you can even think about your actions or how weird they could be to the boy next to you, your hand lifting up to your face and you tongue peaking out to lick at the sticky substance. You jerk slightly at the taste, but in a thought of self challenge and a simple ‘fuck it,’ you slide the flat of your tongue up the side of your hand, collecting everything he left behind, before swallowing deeply.

You hear a muffled sound of surprise to your side, the sound making your head whip to the side as you remembered your possible audience. Your heart beats fast as you panic at the idea of him finding your action gross, but as you look you see him in a very similar position.

Yangyang grins around his fingers that were once drenched in your orgasm, but now sit licked clean in his teasing mouth. There’s a slight popping noise as he pulls them hesitantly from his lips, and his devious smile only grows before he speaks.

“Oh so we’re both like gross, gross huh?”

[yoonieboonie]

The Substitute Lover (1)

word count: 2k

genre: fluff, angst hehe

pairing: myg x reader

summary: Finally meeting the college boy you've been eyeing on for months, everything goes wrong when you realise what you're really getting yourself into.

a/n: this is my first ever fic!! i hope you guys take time and read it 🥺 suggestions are welcome! NEXT | PREVIOUS

Moving to Seoul was a dream come true. For someone who lived in the farmland of Daegu, you always imagined what the city would be like. A concrete jungle far from the roaring fields that's all you've ever known, a breath of fresh air— metaphorically speaking.

Fuelled by dreams, and frankly a few wons to your name— you took the risk and moved your life in order to pursue your studies in the metro. Your thoughts drift to the heaps of paperwork that needs to be accomplished after this and frankly, you are exhausted.

You sigh, as you finally step in your worn down but still livable apartment. You got it for a really good deal since your mother is a friend of the landlady. You tried your best to make it as homey as you can. Placing a few touches of home to every corner.

"What does this even mean?" you wondered aloud, reading the email for the third time as if it would magically unsend itself. It was from the professor of your Humanities class, announcing the change of schedule. Your afternoon classes are now moved to morning, taking away all of the few hours of rest you get after getting home. You groaned and moved the cursor to tick the 'agreed' box. It's not like you have a choice anyways.

You drag your feet to class the next morning, sitting to the far right corner and preventing any interaction from the fellow victims of the change in schedule. Confused if your eyes are playing tricks, your hands flew to your thick-rimmed glasses to push it further up your nose. Then you saw it, the mint green hair that stood out in every room. To say that he intrigued you is an understatement. You are drawn to him, like a moth to a flame. You keep on looking for him at every corner of the campus, just catching a glimpse of him makes your day. He as usual is squished between his two friends who are chattering in the early hours of the morning.

The professor arrived not long after, immediately discussing the basic concept of Humanities, you scramble to get a pen and your notebook. If there's one thing you take seriously, it's your studies. You did not risk everything and moved here just to slack off.

The mint hair boy suddenly forgotten, you blink in shock as an orange head snapped to view your direction.

"Hi, I'm Hoseok. May I borrow a pen?" He asks, a hand rubbing his nape. You nodded mutely handing a pen, trying to show nonchalance that he is talking to me. The interaction had the student council president, if you remember correctly, shake his head.

"What? It's not my fault that you refused to lend me one despite of bringing a whole school supply store with you all the time." Hoseok muttered to which the president tried to counter, earning a snarl from the mint haired boy in the middle to shut the banter up.

Lecture flew by and hungry for a few hours more of sleep, you dash to the exit only to hear a voice calling out a 'hey'. You turned to look and see Hoseok waving your pen in the air.

You smiled and grabbed the pen from his hand. You bowed out of respect, and turned to leave. Only for Hoseok to grab your arm, making you halt and gently pull away.

He sheepishly smiled and apologised for catching you off guard. "It's just, I didn't get your name!" he chirped.

Panic bubbled inside you as you see his two friends catch up to him. You were not prepared at all to meet the boy you've been eyeing on for months.

"Y/N." You replied shortly and bowed again as you turned to leave. It was too late as you hear a new voice address you.

"Hey, Y/N? I've been wanting to know your name for months! Aren't you the one who stole my spot as the top Scrabble player in the campus?" The student campus president joked to which you gave a hearty laugh back, remembering the match.

"That's me." You replied curtly. You really want to leave, the zoo in your stomach will be the death of you. The boy who is silent until now is busy adjusting the case of his guitar.

"Well, it's nice to meet you. This is Yoongi." he gestured to the mint haired boy who just looked up. He gave you a curt nod that shot electricity to your veins.

"Let's eat lunch together, Y/N!" Hoseok beamed, catching all of us off guard. You racked your brain for an excuse but found none. Here you are 30 minutes later, trying to answer every question Hoseok and Namjoon have for you.

You learned that all of them are voice majors, Yoongi and Hoseok minored in guitar while Namjoon in flute. They had to retake Humanities because they failed to take the final exam due to the conflict of schedule thus the need to enroll again this semester.

Quietly finishing your meal, you nod off to the trio and started to gather your things. You fixed your thick rimmed glasses and your skirt that reached your ankles. Namjoon eyed you from head to toe, not bothering to hide the judgment that came with it. You shrugged and bid goodbye.

"Thank you for the company. See you guys around." You bid and thinking that it's probably your last and only chance to talk to Yoongi, you call for him.

"See you around, Yoongi." You beamed. Hoseok roared with laughter as Yoongi blushed from the sudden attention. Namjoon watched in amusement as the whole scene plays out.

You finally, turned to leave the trio behind.

  -----------------------------------------

  After a week, it was time for your Humanities class again. This time, you arrived earlier, sitting at your usual spot.

Not long after, students started filing in the the classroom. That's when you spotted a familiar orange head. He excitedly waved at you and grabbed onto Yoongi and Namjoon's arms for them to come and sit next to you.

You laugh heartily and paid them no mind. Hoseok whispered next to you if you wanted to eat lunch again after class. You nodded, truly enjoying the trio's company. Sure, you wanted to come because Yoongi was there, but also because Namjoon and Hoseok are cool to be with.

After class, you all headed to the cafeteria. You started to line up eyeing the dishes carefully. Just watching then made your mouth water. Distracted, you bump into the person in front of you. You gasped, as you mutter an apology, profusely bowing your head. That's when you heard surprised reactions from the small crowd that noticed the interaction. Slowly you felt cold liquid drip on your head, down to your clothes.

That draws the line. You may not be from here, and you may not look like much but you surely can defend yourself. You opened your mouth to speak when you were gently shoved behind someone's shoulder. As if shielding you from the student who poured the liquid on you.

"Is there a problem here?" Namjoon's voice was cold as ice. The student, probably in fear of getting in trouble tried to pin the blame on you to which another voice countered.

"I saw you from where I was sitting. Tell the truth, it's getting embarrassing." Hoseok, who is suddenly next to you, yawns.

"It's fine. It's water, it'll dry." You said confidently, smiling at the student who looked scared for her dear life. She looks younger, so you cut her some slack.

You bought your food and sat back at our table. You could feel the three of them eyeing you as you chomp down on your first proper meal of the day. You glanced at Yoongi, who for the first time since you've met was looking at you. You beamed at him before wiping your mouth with a napkin, as you cleared your throat.

"Yoongi, would you like to have coffee tomorrow?" you asked, my hands under the table over your lap.

Hoseok and Namjoon looked shocked beyond words. Yoongi on the other hand, didn't even spare you a glance. You winced internally but kept your composure cool. Namjoon cleared his throat and pushed a bottle of water towards my direction.

"Maybe you need a drink, Y/N." You accepted and drank. Then after, you faced Yoongi again.

"Is that a yes?"

It's Hoseok's turn to intervene now, using a napkin to get your glasses from your nose and wipe it. He tried to dry your hair too but you leaned away from his touch.

"Y/N, I think it's best you let this go." Namjoon spoke again.

"Why? Are you dating anyone?" You questioned further.

That seemed to be the last straw for Yoongi for he stood up, gathered his music sheets and left the three of us, not even bothering to carry his lunch.

Hoseok looked around the table before laughing in amusement. Namjoon joining not long after. You looked at them, confused beyond words.

"You are something else, Y/N. Now I know why we were always told to not judge a book by its cover." Namjoon beamed.

Hoseok just patted your head. Both of them bidding goodbye, as Namjoon stopped to browse in his notes. He slipped a paper to you and when you glanced down, it looked like their schedule this semester.

You smiled and bid them goodbye.

  You'll try again tomorrow.

  ------------------------------------------

  The following day, you woke up earlier than usual to buy two iced Americanos. If you're lucky, Yoongi might like something to drink before their recital's daily rehearsal.

As if on cue, you hear Hoseok's loud laughter at the campus yard and as expected Yoongi and Namjoon are there with him. You raise your hand and wave towards them as you see Yoongi's eyes darken.

You paid no mind and dragged your feet towards the trio. You stopped in front of them, fixing your glasses and smoothing out your green cardigan. Namjoon like his usual habit, eyed you up and down and scrunched his nose at your taste in clothes. That made you chuckle out loud.

"Hi, Yoongi. I bought you an iced Americano." I offered, handing out the cold beverage. He eyed it carefully, before accepting it and shoving it to Hoseok's face.

Hoseok winced and looked at you apologetically. You shook your head and smiled.

"That's okay, I didn't peg you as an Americano guy anyway. How about an iced Latte for tomorrow?" you quipped, not giving up.

"Look, Y/N, isn't it?" Yoongi started. "I do appreciate the gesture but I am not interested. I am taken, and will never be available."

You felt your shoulder slump. That makes sense, with how he looks and the entirety of him, it was impossible for him to be single. You nodded and started to apologise when you heard Hoseok chirp beside you.

"No he's not!"

  "Hoseok!" Namjoon hissed. Hoseok shrugged his shoulders and dragged you away. With one last look at Yoongi, you followed Hoseok.

"Look, I'll help you. Just tell me what you need." Hoseok bounced with excitement. You laughed, you honestly didn't think you'd get this far.

"It's okay, I got this." You whispered to Hoseok.

"Hey, Min Yoongi!" you called out. He turned to look at you and you raised your hand to point at the bulletin board. He quipped his head to the side as if challenging you to continue. You sighed and moved closer to the board to point at the upcoming examination schedule.

"Our finals is coming up soon." You stated.

  "If I beat you and score higher than you, then we'll go on that date. Otherwise, you'll never hear from me again." You challenged.

Namjoon whistled at that, onlookers started to get interested and eventually started to taunt Yoongi. You smirk and wait for his response.

Hoseok and Namjoon are in the sidelines, watching and honestly enjoying their friend's struggle. Hoseok lazily drinking the iced Americano that you bought for Yoongi.

Yoongi stayed silent and you took that as your cue to leave, only a few steps in, you turned and moved closer to a glaring Yoongi.

"Oh, I forgot something!" you exclaimed.

You then stalked towards him, grabbing both of his collar towards you. Eliminating the height difference, you inched your face closer to his until your lips met. It was a quick peck but just enough to make the crowd roar and make Yoongi burn red in embarrassment.

You slowly took a step back. Bidding Namjoon and Hoseok goodbye.

What the fuck did you just do? -------------------------------------------------------------------------

NEXT | PREVIOUS

[anotherspnfanfic]

Holy Muffins, Batman

Summary: She needs somewhere to work, Dean has just the place.

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word count: 1612

Warnings: none, it’s all fluff

Squares filled: Cafe owner!Dean for @spnchristmasbingo, burgers and fries for @spndeanbingo

A/N: I kind of love how this one turned out. 😊

~~~

She walked into the cafe and smiled when she saw her favorite corner booth was empty. As she slid into her seat, she pulled out her laptop.

“G’morning, sweetheart. You’re here early today.”

She looked over and spotted Dean headed her way. “Yeah, tell me about it.” She stifled a yawn. “But I have a deadline. I stared at a blinking cursor for at least two and a half hours yesterday. I figured a change of scenery might do the trick. My editor will hunt me down if she doesn’t have something from me today.”

“So extra large on your latte then?” He was already slowly backing away from the table to go prepare her drink.

She nodded eagerly. “Please, and keep ‘em coming.”

He returned a couple minutes later. He set a large mug on the table and a plate with three muffins. “Here you go, sweetheart.”

“Holy muffins, Batman.” She laughed.

He chuckled and shrugged. “Blueberry, your usual. The others are a gingerbread and a, uh, lemon cranberry.” He sounded uncertain. “Jody made them. Something about us needing Christmas-themed options. Figured you could test them out and let me know what you think.”

She lifted the one with cranberries and smelled it. “I think I can handle that. They smell amazing.”

“I’ll let you get to work. Let me know if you need anything.” He smiled as he turned and walked over to greet a recently-occupied table.

Sipping her latte, she looked around the cafe and watched as a handful of people came in for their morning coffee and promptly left again. She pulled off pieces of each of the muffins, munching as she people-watched. When she had finished off one muffin, she finally opened her laptop and powered it up.

Accessing her previously saved Word document, she heard Dean laugh. The sound drew her attention to where he stood behind the counter, joking with a couple placing an order. She couldn’t help but mirror his infectious smile. She turned her attention to the screen in front of her. Before she knew it, she had several paragraphs written and the inspiration was, finally, flowing freely.

Some time later, she reached for her mug that had been nearly empty when she’d last taken a sip. Instead, she found a new, full latte in its place. She wondered when that had appeared and how she had missed the delivery. She looked up and spotted Dean wiping down the table two over from her. “Thanks, Dean.” She lifted the mug as she spoke. He winked before resuming his task. She felt the blush creep over her cheeks as she turned her attention back to her writing.

She finished a chapter and was emailing the document to her editor when a hand waved between her face and the computer screen. She looked up to find Dean standing beside the table with a plate in his hands.

“I think you’ve looked away from that screen once in the last four hours,” he started. He set the plate down. “And that was ten minutes after I brought you a fresh latte. I figured you might be hungry, but I didn’t want the burger to be cold before you noticed it.”

“It has not been…” She trailed off as she looked at the clock. “How has it been four hours?!”

He shrugged.

She picked a fry off the plate and ate it. “Well, you were right. I am actually starving.”

He chuckled. “We can’t have that. Is there anything else I can get you?”

She bit her lip to contain her smile. “Hmm, yes. Some company would be nice.”

He smirked mischievously. “Sure. I can send Jody over. You can tell her what you think of the muffins.”

She rolled her eyes. “Not who I had in mind. The boss does give you a lunch break, right?”

“I think he can make an exception today,” he teased. Both of them knowing he was talking about himself. “I’ll be right back.”

He came back two minutes later with another plate with his own burger and fries. He set the dish on the table before sliding in across from her.

As he settled, she took a bite of her burger and moaned loudly. He raised his eyebrows, amusement playing across his features. “Sorry,” she mumbled, quickly covering her mouth.

“You won’t ever hear me complain about getting a woman to make that sound,” he said with a cocky smirk. He winked before lifting his own burger off his plate.

“Smooth.” She took another bite and waited until she had swallowed to continue. “Seriously though, I hope you know you’ve ruined burgers from anywhere else. These are incredible.”

A small, proud smile replaced his smirk as he broke eye contact momentarily. “Thank you.”

They continued to eat in a comfortable silence. Munching on the remaining fries, she asked, “Do you have any fun plans for Christmas?”

He nodded as he finished chewing. “Kind of. Just dinner and gifts with my brother, his wife, and our parents. What about you?”

“Pretty much the same. Dinner and gifts with my sister and parents.”

“Just the one sibling?” he asked.

“Yup. Just me and her. Just you and your brother?”

He nodded. “Older or younger?”

“She’s older. I’m the baby of the family.” He stole a fry off her plate and she smacked his hand. She scowled the best she could while trying not to laugh.

“Sammy is four years younger than me.” There was a fondness in his voice that told her how much he loved his brother.

“So you torment him.” It wasn’t a question.

Dean chuckled. “Well, it is in the older sibling handbook. It’s actually required.”

She finished her fries then lifted her napkin to wipe her mouth. She set it on top of the empty plate.

He watched as she eyed her laptop quickly. “What exactly is it you’ve been typing away at all morning?”

“The beginning of my next book. It’s the third of a series,” she explained.

“Wow. What are they about?”

“Monsters.” She watched as his eyebrows rose in surprise. “Werewolves, vampires, changelings… you know, all the things that go bump in the night.”

He cleared his throat, letting the information settle. “I don’t know what I was expecting but that wasn’t it. Please, tell me more.”

She shook her head. “You are just going to have to read the books if you want to know more.”

“Okay.” He reached toward the laptop to try and pull it over to himself.

She pushed his hand away. “No, no, no, nice try. I was referring to the published ones.”

He pouted. “Fine. I guess I should let you get back to it.” He stood and picked up the empty plates.

“Thanks for joining me.” She pulled her laptop in front of her and was back to writing before he was ten steps away.

Several hours and lattes later, she finished sending yet another email to her editor before starting to shut down her laptop. Glancing around, she noticed most of the tables had the chairs set up on top. Dean was sitting at a table near the window, Christmas lights now lit in the trees outside. She smiled at the view for a moment. She could see his concentration as he typed something. Pulling her eyes away from him she finally noticed everyone else was gone, including his staff.

“Where is everyone?” she asked, causing him to look over at her.

He checked his watch and chuckled. “I actually closed up about twenty minutes ago.”

“What?” She closed her laptop and put it back into her bag. “Why didn’t you kick me out?”

“You looked like you were on a roll.” He gestured toward the surface in front of him, littered with papers. “And I wasn’t ready to head out anyway.”

Grabbing her bag, she stood and moved towards his table. “Don’t you have a perfectly good office for all of that?”

He gave her a lopsided grin as he glanced back down at the table. “Yes, I do, but I didn’t want you to look up and find no one here.”

She shifted her bag on her shoulder. “I appreciate that, and thank you for letting me camp out here all day.”

“You are welcome to camp out here anytime you want to, sweetheart.”

She blushed. “So, what do I owe you?”

He waved his hand dismissively. “On the house.” She shook her head and opened her mouth to protest. “I insist.” He reached forward and pulled down the laptop screen, smoothly closing it.

She groaned. “Fine. If you insist. Thank you, again.”

He stood and placed his hands on both of her arms. He tipped his head down and looked her in the eyes. “Any chance you want to go get some dessert somewhere? I know a place that has great pie.”

She looked down at the table. “I thought you said you weren’t ready to leave yet.” She looked back at him and watched the smallest smile appear.

“Did I?” He feigned innocence. “Huh, well I can finish this later.”

She considered his offer. “On one condition. We also walk around downtown to look at all the Christmas lights.”

“Sounds like a deal.” He offered his hand for her to take. As she took it, he ran his thumb across her knuckles. He took two steps backwards before turning toward the door and pulling her with him. He flipped the lights off and locked the door as they left.

Enjoying each other’s company, they slowly strolled hand-in-hand down the sidewalk toward their destination, taking in all the lights and decorations along the way.

~~~

Tags: @deanwasscaredbyacat @babypieandwhiskey @muchamusedaboutnothing @defenderrosetyler @akshi8278 @like-a-bag-of-potatoes @thoughts-and-funnies

[platonicteenwolf]

Second Chance At First Line

(S1E2) Part I

Teen Wolf x Reader Series Rewrite

A/N: I AM BACK!! Got back into my Teen Wolf interest so will be writing a LOT MORE soon so look forward to that!! :D Also apologies there's not as much reader in this one, I didn't want to shove them into the plot-line but deffo more in the future :]

They/Them Pronouns Version

He/Him Pronouns Version

Next Part / Masterlist

Warnings: none

Walking into the boys Lacrosse locker room, Scott slowly drops his bag in front of his locker, gloves falling to the floor next to it. He seems to be moving in a trance. Turns, back against the locker, his eyes look over the crowd of teammates staring in shock.

Stiles pokes his head out from around the corner.

“You apologize to Allison?” He questions.

“Yeah.”

“So she’s giving you a second chance or..?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah! Alright! So everything’s good?”

“No.”

“No?”

Giving a heavy sigh, Scott explains his dilemma to his friend “Remember the hunters? Her dad is one of them.”

“Her dad?”

“Shot me...”

“Allison’s father?” Stiles seems shocked to hear this new information.

“...With a crossbow.”

“Allison’s--“

“YES. HER FATHER!” Speaking louder than necessary, his voice carries across the locker room and a few heads turn to see the commotion. Scott snaps out of the daze and into a full on panic. “Oh my God, oh my Godddd. What am I going to do?”

“No, Scott. Snap back. Ok?” He lightly tapped the side of Scott’s face trying to bring him back in focus. “Okay, okay--did he recognize you?”

“No, I don’t think so--“

“Does she know about him?”

“I- I don’t know, what if she does?” Scott’s face contorts in anguish as he realizes how much danger he could be in. “This is gonna kill me man.”

“All right, okay, we’ll figure it out. Just--just focus on lacrosse. Take this, take this,” Stiles begins picking up his practice pads and handing them to his friend. “Just focus on lacrosse for now, that’s all you’ve got to do.” Now patting him on the arm, emphasizing every word, Stiles tries his best to help Scott’s panic. “Here, we, go.”

—————

A whistle rings throughout the field.

“Let’s go!” Coach Finstock yells as the players slam into each other during practice. “One-on-one from up top!”

As Jackson jogs towards the bleachers Coach calls his name.

“Jackson, take a long stick today... Attaboy.”

Coach Finstock tosses the ball to the first player, a kid named Greenberg. But Jackson is on him in seconds, smashing his stick down on the poor kid’s gloves, sending the ball flying out of the pocket.

“Nicely done, Jackson,” Coach praises. “Greenberg, that was a pathetic display of amateur ability. Do a lap.”

As Greenberg takes off into a run, the next Player charges. Scott, gazing off with far too many thoughts swirling in his head, doesn’t notice the other players backing up behind him.

“McCall, what’re your waiting for. Let’s go!”

He snaps to attention, realizing he’s at the head of the line. Coach tosses the ball. Scott goes for the shot. Running towards the goal, Jackson steps up to meet him half way and slams into Scott. A moment later he lands on the ground with a sickening thud. Coach is walking over to where Scott lays stunned on the ground.

Chuckling he asks, “Hey McCall, Hey McCall!”

As the werewolf looks towards the sky, he cradles his forearm where Jackson’s stick came down especially hard between his glove and elbow pad.

“You sure you still want to be first line, McCall,” Jackson taunts.

Gritting his teeth in anger, Scott looks up to see Jackson walking away.

“McCall, my grandmother can move faster than that and she’s dead! Can you move faster than the... lifeless corpse of my dead grandmother, McCall?”

Now seething in his rage, Scotts reveals his brown eyes which are rapidly brightening to yellow. “Yes, Coach.”

“I can’t hear you.”

“Yes Coach!” He says slightly louder.

“Then do it again.” As Scott jogs back to the front of the line, Coach calls to the rest of the team. “McCalls gonna do it again!”

The whistle blows and Scott shoots forward again as Coach tosses the ball to him. Stiles steps away from the rest of the team, noticing the change in Scott. His speed, the extraordinary agility with which he moves.

An oblivious Jackson goes for a cross check, heading for Scott with his stick horizontal even as the smaller boy hurtles toward him with ferocious speed.

They collide like two goats locking horns. Both go down, Jackson hollering as he hits the ground.

The sickening sound of bone dislodging from socket sends a cringe through Coach. While everyone else runs over to check on Jackson, Stiles hurries to Scott’s side.

“Are you okay?”

But Scott won’t lift his head, won’t reveal his face to Stiles underneath the helmet.

“Scott?”

His head tilts up to reveal the sharpened teeth jutting out from his lower jaw.

“It’s happening. I can’t control it.“

“Come, on. Now? Get up, get up.”

Grabbing him by the shoulder pads, Stiles pulls him up. As Stiles drags him off the field and toward the lockers, neither of them notice someone watching from the sidelines... Derek Hale.

—————

The door to the darkened locker room clangs open, Stiles dragging a hunched over Scott inside.

“Get back,” Scott warns.

“I’m just trying to help--“

“Get away from me!”

His voice comes out with a frighteningly demonic rasp, head snapping around as if to rip out the other boy’s throat.

Stiles retreats, almost stumbling over his own feet at the sight of Scott’s eyes. The sounds coming from him are painful, animalistic and frighteningly aggressive.

Turning back, Scott doubles over in pain. He tears off his lacrosse gloves to reveal his sharpened claws.

Stiles keeps stepping away in fear, accidentally backing into a fire extinguisher against the wall.

The clang of metal causes Scott to whip his head around. But it’s no longer Scott under that helmet or behind those rage-filled yellow eyes.

He hurtles toward Stiles, rounding the corner of the lockers, jumping onto the wood bench and up as Stiles lifts the fire extinguisher and pulls the trigger, blasting CO2 from the nozzle. Scott’s clawed hands come up to shield his face, plumes of white surrounding him.

Darting around another corner, Stiles backs against the lockers, waiting for the next attack.

“Stiles?”

Slowly, Stiles peers around the locker row to see Scott on the floor, chest heaving with each difficult breath. He pulls the helmet off to reveal he’s back to normal. Face drenched with sweat.

“What happened?”

“You tried to kill me.”

Stiles drops the extinguisher to the floor. Still shaking and unable to conceal his anger at his friend.

“It’s like I told you. It’s the anger, your pulse rising. They’re all triggers.”

“But that’s lacrosse. It’s a pretty violent game if you hadn’t noticed.”

“Well, its gonna be a lot more violent if you end up killing someone on the field. You can’t play Saturday. You have to get out of the game.”

“But I’m first line.”

“Not anymore.”

—————

An emotionally and physically exhausted Scott tosses his school bag on the floor and falls face first onto the bed. Melissa McCall looks in.

“Late shift again for me, but I’m taking a night off to see your first game.”

“Mom, you can’t.”

“I can and I will. One shift won’t break us. Not completely. And what’s wrong with your eyes?”

Scott glances up in alarm.

“You look like you haven’t slept in days.”

“Oh. It’s nothing. Just kind of stressed.”

“Just stress? Nothing else? You’re not on drugs or anything?”

“Right now?”

“Right now?! What do you mean right now? Have you ever taken drugs?”

“Have you?”

A question she clearly doesn’t want to answer.

“Get some sleep.”

Car keys in hand, Melissa leaves.

Scott drags himself up from the bed and hits the mouse on his computer. The moment it wakes, a web chat invitation from Stiles pops up. Scott hits accept and Stiles and James appeared in the voice call.

—————

As Scott pops up on my screen, Stiles spins around in his chair holding a nerf gun, shooting at the camera.

“You’re such a nerd Stiles,” I chide.

Defending himself, he mocks back. “You’re such a nerd Stiles”

Interrupting our tom-foolery, Scott asks, “What’d you find out?”

“It’s bad,” I warn, “Jackson’s got a separated shoulder.”

“Because of me?”

“Oh please,” Stiles says. “It’s because he’s a tool. It’s not your fault.”

“Is he going to play?”

Relaying what Coach told me earlier, I tell the boys “They don’t know yet. But now they’re all counting on you for Saturday.”

As Scott sighs, Stiles leans closer to the web cam window, squinting his eyes at it. He seems to be looking at something in Scott’s room.

“What?”

A text window pops up the screen and Stiles types:

It looks like--

Scott’s screen starts lagging and a notification comes up across his screen saying he has a bad connection. As I zoom in on Scott’s image trying to see what Stiles is talking about, I finally see it. A dark shadow is standing behind him in his room. Leaping from my chair, I run to Stiles room and slam open the door. Pulling up a chair next to him, I meet his face full of worry as Scott’s screen continues to load.

—————

The cursor turns into a spinning wheel, the computer momentarily hung up. Stiles’s web cam image freezes.

“Looks like what?”

A moment later, the cursor finally stops spinning and the rest of the text appears:

It looks like someone’s behind you.

Scott stops breathing. He doesn’t turn around.

Staying very still, his eyes move to his own image in the bottom corner of the web cam window. He slowly clicks the mouse, re-sizing the window, making it larger and larger until he sees his own reflected face, an expression of pure fear on it. And behind him a strange silhouette. Someone is standing there in the shadows of his room.

Scott spins around and Derek grabs him, yanking him away from the desk, sending the laptop clattering to the floor. Dragging him up, he slams Scott face first to the wall.

“I saw you on the field.”

”What? What are you talking--“

“You shifted in front of them. If they find out what you are, they find out about me. About all of us. Then it’s not just hunters after us. It’s everyone.”

“But they didn’t, didn't see anything. I swear--“

“And they won’t. Because if you try to play that game Saturday...” Derek comes terrifyingly close, right next to Scott’s ear.

“I’ll kill you myself.”

He pulls Scott from the wall and sends him tumbling across the room. When Scott looks up from the floor, Derek is gone.

The bedroom window lies open where he must have leapt with incredible speed, leaving Scott alone in his room. And shaking in fear...

—————

Tag List: @linkpk88 @mochminnie @im-a-stranger-thing @that-winged-rat @avengersgirl1221

[insfiringyou]

BTS - Going Solo (Part One) - Jimin x Ara

Contains: Angst. *Potential trigger warning for descriptions of panic attacks*

Set a few months following their scene in ‘Private Moments’, Ara is faced with a decision which will change the course of her future. 

(Part Two will be uploaded soon, after a few fics focusing on some of the other members.)

You can find out more about our headcanon universe and ongoing storyline here and more about our headcanon girlfriends here.

To read each member & their girlfriend’s headcanon universe fics in order, follow the links here: RM   /   Jin /   Suga /   J-Hope   /   Jimin   /   V   /   Jungkook & our full masterlist of fanart and fanfictions can be found here

If you wish to follow all member’s storylines in chronological order from the beginning, you can find them listed here.

Content below the cut

‘Jimin,

We just spoke, and you asked if I was happy. I think I am. At least most days.’

Ara typed slowly. Her nails had just been manicured and were longer than she was used to. The sound of acrylics against the keyboard rang through the small hotel room. 

‘When I’m with you I can feel really happy. You can be so sweet and loving and I appreciate you always check up on me - to make sure I’m okay. Touring is hard. You know it better than anybody else, and you tried to prepare me for it.’

She gave a soft sigh, knowing no one else would hear. The words were spilling out of her fingers before her brain had time to catch up, though she knew based on experience she would eventually work out what she was trying to say. The room was dark and the white glow from the word document was starting to make her eyes water. The contact lenses had been in all day and were getting on her nerves. Still, she persevered. She could remove them once she had finished. 

‘I’ve been asked to renew my contract.’

She stopped typing, heart thudding, and realised she felt scared. Her hand moved automatically to her stomach and she exhaled slowly before taking a deep, drawn out breath. She had been practicing and it had gotten easier. At first she would panic, and find her chest rising and falling like crazy, on the verge of hyperventilation, but soon she learned the trick; it was her stomach which was supposed to be moving, not her chest. Her cheeks were a little warm and she knew it was shame she was feeling, not embarrassment. She hadn’t told him yet, despite having known for over a week. Tentatively, she continued, fingers picking up speed as she became used to the sensation of the new nails. 

‘You remember me telling you the first was on a trial basis, based on sales. Well - whatever target they set for us, we must have hit it. Even you have noticed the increase in publicity lately...the T.V appearances. They’ve asked me to film a reality show. I don’t know what they’re expecting.’

Her brow furrowed, wondering...

‘I guess they might have asked you too?’

The laptop stayed silent for a long time and she rested her hands against the small, cheap desk as she gazed at the screen. Her mind suddenly seemed blank and she felt stupid. She would never send the document to Jimin, just as she hadn’t sent the ones she had written before; three month’s worth of unopened, worthless ramblings saved in some obscure folder on her desktop, trapped in the harddrive somewhere between her acoustic recordings and photographs of hairstyles she had saved from Pinterest. She often wondered why she even bothered to save them. Her counsellor had told her, time and time again, that keeping a diary would be helpful. She could record her mood swings and track her periods, along with keeping count of what she ate; wholegrains made her bloated, red food colourings brought out a rash. She sometimes worried she might be lactose intolerant, though could handle it in coffee. That type of thing. She kept it up at first; bashfully bringing the sparkly diary into the small office she visited once a month and reciting what she had written to the man opposite. He would nod sympathetically as she spoke, making a comment from time to time; asking how she felt about what she had put. But the company was paying him to do this; all the girls went, and she sometimes wondered if it was the food diary he was really interested in. If her manager was keeping track, making sure she and the other members were not overdoing it on the full-fat salad dressing and milky lattes. 

The diary entries began to dwindle and, not long after her last week-long visit back to Seoul, the meaningless letters on her laptop started. They were usually addressed to Jimin, though she had written several to her father and one to her brother. She wasn’t good with words; she had been told that often enough at school when she would have to read out loud from the book of the week in Literature, or come up with an argument in Business Studies. Her mouth would stumble and she’d turn red, both ashamed and humiliated, until the teacher inevitably took pity on her and told her to sit back down. Writing in private was much easier, especially when she knew no one but her would see.

‘I don’t know how to feel.’

The cursor hovered, blinking at the end of the last line. There was a heavy knock at the door and Ara jumped, hands automatically reaching for the laptop lid, before a familiar female voice called out.

“Ara? Are you coming?”

She quickly gathered herself, clicking the save icon at the top of the screen. The company had arranged a group meal in the restaurant downstairs, though she had forgotten, her mind distracted by more pressing thoughts.

“In a minute…I just need to change my lenses.” She called back, moving her finger against the touchpad as a pop-up appeared. She selected the save button once more, mouth twisting as she read the title in the little window: ‘Untitled #12.’ She wondered if she would ever get around to renaming them properly.

***

“Your hair has so much texture. I wish mine were thicker.”

Ara murmured in reply before catching the young stylist’s reflection in the mirror and realising how rude she must have sounded. Da-eun had come to the company some months before and was undeniably sweet. Too sweet, Ara sometimes thought, for the business she was in. The other makeup artists and hairdressers loved to keep one ear to the wall, in case there was a chance of promotion or, she rather cynically suspected, a way to increase their pay by selling gossip, but Da-eun didn’t seem like that. At least not yet.

After a moment’s hesitation, Ara smiled into the glass at the figure behind her. “I’m glad I have you to do it for me. The roots are a nightmare!”

Da-eun returned the smile and seemed to relax, but a curious expression still played on her features as she ran the straightener gently across the dyed tips of hair. “Are you tired?”

“I didn’t get much sleep.” Ara confirmed, briefly closing her eyes. Da-eun knew not to press her, but she couldn’t help but worry the younger woman might know more than she was letting on. They had shared hotel rooms in the past and, perhaps it was the stylist's instinct, used to paying close attention to detail, but she always seemed to tell when something was amiss. It was frustrating sometimes. 

“I looked at the schedule. You’re not going on set until last so you’ll have time to rest before you go out.” Da-eun murmured helpfully. Ara nodded, relieved. It occurred to her, not for the first time, that Da-eun should quit while she could; while she was still young and hopeful and kind. 

“I just don’t have the energy right now…” Ara sighed as she felt her hair being released. The younger woman finished working the ends and unplugged the device from the dressing room table. 

“Did you sign the contract yet?” 

Her voice was inquisitive and a little optimistic. Ara had never asked, but there was always the chance that Da-eun’s contract was somehow tied to her own; that if the group were to disband, she might lose her job. Ara shook her head lightly.

“No.”

Da-eun raised an eyebrow. “Are you having second thoughts?”

“I just haven’t had time to read it properly.” She said, truthfully. “It’s come around sooner than I thought…”

The stylist moved forward, reaching for the set of hairbrushes on the counter, before selecting the biggest. She teased through the ends of hair with her short fingers before brushing lightly along the bleached roots, smoothing the locks. 

“There’s been rumours.” The younger woman said, voice suddenly low as though she were worried about being overheard. A thick curtain set apart the dressing room from the photography studio, but it was always possible someone was listening. 

Ara blinked, tensing a little. “What?”

Da-eun smiled gently. “That you’re making a solo album.”

“Oh…” The older woman wasn’t sure what she had expected, but this news took her by surprise. “I wasn’t planning on it.” She shrugged.

“That’s a relief.” Da-eun beamed with a small laugh. “I’m looking forward to going home soon. Aren’t you?”

Ara opened her mouth to speak, not sure what she was going to say, but the curtain beside them drew apart suddenly; startling them both. 

“Oh! Costume change…” Da-eun exclaimed, setting down the brush and turning to accommodate the older woman who had just entered. Mimi was a year older than Ara and usually less prone to accidents, but the leather strap on her camisole suggested a wardrobe malfunction which needed attending to at once.

“Sorry to interrupt…” The other woman murmured apologetically, gesturing to Da-eun. “Could you fix this for me?”

“Sure.” She nodded, stepping away.

Ara’s phone had vibrated against her thigh twenty minutes before but she hadn’t wanted to risk opening the text, especially with someone standing over her shoulder. As Da-eun seated Mimi in the rotating chair on the opposite side of the room to take a look at her costume, Ara took the moment to slip the device from her pocket and flick through the recent notifications. Unsurprisingly, it had been Jimin who had texted and she read the sentence a couple of times before returning it to her pocket.

‘Two more weeks. I’m looking forward to seeing you. It’s been too long.’ 

***

Ara sipped from the glass, the cool water clearing her throat and offering a much needed refreshment from the events of the day. Her voice had become raspy from singing, but luckily she didn’t need it to type. 

‘Jimin,

I was cleaning my closet before we went on tour and found the dress I was wearing on the night we met.’

She found herself smiling, a little longingly, at the memory, a strange anecdote coming to mind.

‘It still has a Daiquiri stain on the hem and it’s too big for me now. I don’t know why I’m saving it.’

The thought made her sad, somehow. 

‘I wonder if you remember that night as clearly as I do. I didn’t want to leave. I knew you were with someone else, but I didn’t care.’

A deep frown played on her otherwise gentle features.

‘Does that make me a bad person?’

It wasn’t until she read the line back, she realised the thought had never occurred to her before. Not once in five years. She wondered why it suddenly seemed to matter. With a sigh, she continued, committing her trail of thoughts to the page.

‘You told me it was over the next time we met, and I believed you, but part of me wondered if you’d go back to her, once you knew how inexperienced I was. I guess I know how you feel sometimes. The whole thing has taken me by surprise as well. I never felt like anyone would want me.’

Her chest ached as she typed the final sentence; overwhelmed by emotion. It was true that the compliments and flirty glances she often received were met with an automatic but fleeting sense of glee. It felt novel, after so long of feeling like she didn’t deserve it. It sometimes still felt that way; back in the hotel room, after the cheers of the crowd had faded. She had brought the subject up with her company counsellor who had laughed it off, explaining that everyone suffered with imposter syndrome from time to time; she wasn’t the first and wouldn’t be the last. On the matter of flirting, she had kept that one to herself. It felt too personal and she was sure it would come across as vain. Occasionally it was unwarranted; the older mens’ eyes moving down her legs when she took to the stage in a short skirt back in Seoul, or the way she jumped in alarm when someone once slipped their hand down the back of her jeans while she stood tightly packed in an elevator in Osaka. But other times she found her heart racing and stomach churning; not thinking of Jimin until she tucked herself in bed at night. A pretty, tall waitress brushing her hand as she handed over the bill in a Thai restaurant, or the hotel doorman who had helped her move her luggage earlier in the week and smiled kindly at her in the lobby. She knew Jimin, of all people, would understand. She had seen the way he played the audience, like he had a secret to share with them all. Early in their relationship it had made her crazy; the way he seemed to flirt with anyone he came into contact with, often without even realising. But now the tables had turned. He would understand; but she wasn’t sure he would accept it. 

She glanced a warily at the shadowy corner of the room where an oversized bouquet of red roses sat on the dresser. They had arrived earlier to the hotel room, along with a postcard sized letter from her manager. He had been unable to make the trip to Taiwan but was waiting for her in Tokyo; the contract was ready, whenever she was ready to sign. The flowers seemed like a bribe; the gesture leaving a sour taste in her mouth. She wondered if the other two girls had received any, or if the privilege was all hers. 

The sound of her ringtone, a chirpy, summer tune, alerted her to the fact that an hour had already passed and it was getting late. She quickly swiped the screen and raised it to her ear, not wanting to wake up the neighbours.

“Hello?”

There was a pause before Jimin spoke. “How are you?” 

“Good.” She squinted at her watch with a frown. “What time is it there?”

“2am.”

“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” She asked, a little baffled. He hadn’t called her this late in a while.

“I only just got in. There was a company dinner.” He explained. “What are you up to?”

She hesitated. “Just thinking.”

He laughed, softly mocking her. “Just thinking?”

She shook her head, dismissing it. “Oh, it’s nothing…I was drying my hair.” She lied, fingering the ends of the bone-dry locks in an automatic response. “Da-eun dyed the tips purple for the photoshoot.”

“I liked the pink.” He groaned, a little sulkily.

“They thought purple would fit better with the concept photos.” She mumbled deflatedly. “It’s not really my choice.”

“You could change it when you come home.” He said hopefully. She heard the flirtatious grin in his voice and could picture his smile on the other end. “They can’t do anything about it once your contract has ended.” 

“Maybe.” 

She sounded distant and he noticed the change at once.

“Are you okay?” 

She closed her eyes tightly, temporarily blocking out the glare from the laptop screen. “I’m fine. It’s just been a long day.”

“Did you take a look at the brochures I emailed you?”

“I haven’t had time. I’m sure whatever you pick will be fine.” She knew she sounded a little irritated but was unable to mask it. The weight of the day suddenly seemed to dawn on her and she wanted nothing more than to go to bed. The last thing she wanted to talk about was moving house. 

“I’d really like you to help.” He argued lightly. “There’s a three bedroom going for sale on the Han River. Yoongi says it’s a good deal.”

Ara sighed. “I’m sure he’s right.”

A pause. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I wish you’d stop asking.” She pleaded, feeling on the verge of tears. Jimin seemed to hear the tremor in her voice and thought for a long moment before he spoke, tentatively.

“Maybe you should ask the doctor to change your medication again.”

Ara clutched the phone tightly. “It’s fine.” She tried to smile, hoping it would show in her voice. “I’m feeling much better, just tired.”

“Is that a side effect?” 

He sounded concerned and she nodded to herself, though she knew full well she hadn’t taken the time to read the little leaflet properly. “Probably. Maybe I just need some sleep.”

“Okay.” He agreed, though she sensed his trepidation. “I’d better go then.”

He sounded disappointed and Ara felt guilty once more. “I’m sorry Jimin.” She apologised softly. “It really was nice that you called. It’s just these time zones…”

“I understand.” 

She wondered if he did. Her eyes felt damp beneath her heavy, false eyelashes, making them itch. “I’ll talk to you soon.”

***

She had forgotten her contact lenses and had to rummage through her Birkin to retrieve her reading glasses. They felt strange on her nose and she wondered how she had ever made it through high school wearing them. At least she had been given a moment’s peace to read through the contract. The office overlooked Ueno Station and the rush of traffic below would be too distracting had someone also been watching her. 

‘As a permanent member of the label you should not bring the company into disrepute…’

She read carefully, though the paperwork seemed much larger than the last one she had signed. Some of the phrases looked familiar, such as the declaration of her dedication to being a ‘brand ambassador’, but others were definitely new. Her gaze hovered over one line:

‘...should not jeopardize future success…not limited to personal relationships, controversial thought or opinion including strong ties to political associations, ideologies or groups.’

She expected no less, particularly after Mimi was caught on camera reading a Betty Friedan book. The first part was more complicated and she wondered if Jimin’s management had asked something similar of him. 

With a sigh, she continued down the page, skimming the text now but picking up on key words which seemed important, ‘Maintain a visible and transparent social media presence….Agree to the screening and management of said accounts with the view of protecting our artists and their wellbeing.’

By the time she reached the end, it did not seem to matter and there was a strange comfort in realising this. The past three years had been carefully planned, organised, operated; her future written for her from the moment she stepped foot on stage for the first time. The moments of quiet between shows, or during her increasingly short stays back in Seoul, only seemed to complicate things further. Her thoughts were a mess whenever she stopped to breathe for a moment, and maybe it was easier to shut them off altogether; to give over all control and decision-making to someone else than to try and deal with them all herself. 

The fountain pen was heavier than she expected as she picked it off the table. It had the company brand embossed on the side in gold-leaf which seemed to reflect the fading light outside as the sun set below the concrete structure of the art museum to the West. Slowly, she signed her name on the final page; the ink blotting a little as she moved aside the bound file and repeated the motion on the second copy. The second attempt was neater as she grew used to the feel of the pen in her hand. There was a knack to it; just like many of the things she had grown to learn in her adult life; underwear should be washed on the delicate cycle, t-shirts should be turned inside out before they are ironed, glasses should not be left in the sink too long, should they smash. She had an assistant to do those things now, and her clothes were mostly dry cleaned these days. 

She neatened the piles of paper and put the lid back on the pen, so the ink wouldn’t dry. The first contract had been signed in black Biro, which hadn’t come with such demands. Reaching down, she picked up her black handbag and carefully folded her personal copy, slipping it between her lipstick and glasses case before adding the pen. She had probably paid for it anyway; in her own way. The green light on her phone was blinking and she slid it from the pouch in the lining. The text had arrived while she was in the meeting, which is why she hadn’t heard her phone go off. Her thumb paused over the messenger button for a moment, before she tapped the screen lightly; Jimin’s name and picture coming into view in the little window above the text. 

‘One more week! :)’

***

Thank you for reading. To read each member & their girlfriend’s headcanon universe fics in order, follow the links here: RM   /   Jin /   Suga  /   J-Hope   /   Jimin   /   V   /   Jungkook

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[maria-scribbles]

loyalty’s all i got | part one

summary: three years ago, you had it all: great friends, good grades, and an almost perfect relationship with your boyfriend, jj. it all came crashing down when your mom relocated your family to california for work and you were forced to trade the outer banks for malibu, leaving your broken heart behind in the place you were just starting to think of as home. now you're back in town for college and to pick up the pieces, hoping to make things right again with your friends and the boy you never stopped loving.

word count: 8.9k+ i'm legit incapable of writing something short 😅

ship: jj maybank x female!reader, pogue friendship

warnings: mentions of child abuse, non-graphic injuries, weed, swearing, underage drinking, learning to be vulnerable, trust issues, first love, jj getting the love and affection he deserves, underage sex (nothing too descriptive but it gets a lil spicy, just fyi), teenage heartbreak, failed long distance relationship, angst with a happy ending, references to some taylor swift songs 'cause she's a queen.

a/n: got a lil plot bunny that wouldn't leave me alone so here we are lol. title and inspiration for this fic comes from train's song "rescue dog" that gave me 'jj x reader where they're both damaged goods' vibes the second i heard it. this is semi canon-compliant as the treasure hunt never happened but big john is still alive and kie and sarah still work out their issues and become friends again. i used the names daisy, daniel, deke, and mack as a tribute to agents of shield, one of my favorite shows that had just had its series finale (and i'm still an emotional mess). enjoy and keep an eye out for part two, coming soon!

~masterlist~

part one: when our love was young and easy

For you, having a traveling nurse as a mom was both a blessing and a curse. When you were a kid, you loved bouncing around the country to a new town every so often and finding new places to explore with your rebellious big sister. Back then, she was all you needed to be happy: you'd go anywhere and everywhere as long as Daisy, your best friend, was by your side. 

As you both grew older and started school, you slowly realized that packing up your life every few years sucked. Yeah, seeing new places was cool and all but the novelty wore off fast when you found yourself making friends with your classmates, kids who weren't your sister for once, only to lose touch whenever you moved again. You felt like a ghost, haunting a new school for a while and then leaving behind nothing but a memory, one that gradually faded over time until it was gone, as if you never existed at all. You wondered if anyone actually remembered you. 

It was hard. You gradually became more sullen and withdrawn, finding it more and more difficult to make friends when you knew they wouldn't last, while Daisy acted out even worse than usual and ended up being grounded almost every week. It took her getting arrested while graffitiing the school gym on New Year's Eve for your father - a bit clueless about being a stay-at-home dad to two girls but he tried his best- to put his foot down and tell his wife enough was enough. 

"Our kids need stability, Rebekah. They need a chance to make real friends and stay in one place for longer than two or three years. They need a home."

Thankfully by some miracle, your mother agreed and promised the next move would be the last until you graduated high school. You wanted to believe her so badly but you weren't sure if you could as you packed up your life once again and headed down south from Rhode Island.

That's how you ended up in the Outer Banks of North Carolina, finishing eighth grade at some fancy ass academy that you weren't sure your parents could afford. Daisy, a sophomore, seemed to have no problem fitting in on the north side of the island when she landed a job as a lifeguard at the country club and made fast friends with the rich kids that frequented the pool. It stung a bit when she eventually started ditching you for them (and some older boy named Kelce; you knew she'd snag a boyfriend eventually but you didn't realize it'd be so fast and with someone so...douchey) but you tried not to let it bother you too much, as you were okay getting by on your own and honest-to-God happy for your sister. Making friends was a scary thought when you remembered all the kids you've had to leave behind over the years, all the friendships that crumbled into dust in the wind so you tried to stay at arm's length from your classmates and told yourself you were just fine the way you were. 

The loneliness was hard to ignore though, and you soon found yourself slowly, reluctantly becoming friends with a girl named Kiara that sat beside you in algebra after she helped you cram for a test you completely forgot about, even as warning bells rang loud in your mind. It wasn't long before you started sitting with her and her friend Sarah at lunch, which led to being invited to the beach and the movies and sleepovers and just like that, you remembered what friendship felt like. For the first time, you felt like a normal teenager with a best friend that wasn't your sister and although you liked Sarah, Kiara was the one you were closest to, especially when you found out she hated the kook academy as much as you did.

"Fuck it," She said at one of your sleepovers, sitting on the floor at the end of your bed and rifling through your box of movies. "I'm done with acting like something I'm not, I'm done with being fake, and I'm done with rich kid politics." She tossed Legally Blonde in your direction and then joined you in leaning against the headboard as you slipped the DVD into your laptop.

"Yeah, this whole kook thing kind of sucks." You replied, tapping through the previews to the main menu. "That's why I don't give a shit."

"And that's why I'm so happy you're my friend, Y/N," Kiara said. "You're just yourself and don't try to change for anybody. It's cool."

Cursor hovering over the play button, you paused and glanced over at the other girl. "I'm happy you're my friend, too. I...I only really had my sister growing up so just...thanks, I guess. For being here."

Kiara pulled you into a fierce hug after your impromptu confession and you hugged her back, understanding for the first time what true friendship looked like. 

More kids get added to your posse -three boys named John B, JJ, and Pope- after a catastrophic falling out with Sarah over her fiasco of a birthday party and from the very first time you met them, you realized the south side of the island was where you belonged. The pogues were unabashedly, unapologetically real and you felt the freest you'd ever been when you were hanging out with them and from the way Kiara seemed so much happier, you knew she felt the same way. Those kooks and their status quo could suck it.

You vowed you wouldn't let yourself get too attached to your new friends (cohorts, as your dad jokingly called them), lest you get your heart broken when your mom inevitably moved on to the next job in a year or two; despite her promise, you just had a feeling that it wouldn't last and wished you weren't always waiting for that other shoe to drop. You didn't plan on them becoming your second family and you definitely didn't plan on falling in love for the first time, but life always found new ways to surprise you. 

You were fourteen when you started to notice that one of your friends was cute as fuck. To be honest, you thought all of your friends were pretty cute but there was something about JJ that made you flustered beyond belief every time he crossed your mind. You found yourself more than a little fixated on his golden hair, his bright blue eyes, and the way you always felt at your happiest when he was around; he lived like a wild, out of control hurricane and you wanted to get swept up in the eye of his storm, despite your brain telling you not to.

You never had crushes before, always too busy anticipating worrying about your family's next move to really look at anyone like that but you were definitely looking now while you tried to balance on JJ's surfboard in the gently bobbing waves, your trembling hands planted firmly on his -bare, tan, strong- shoulders as he held it steady.

"Lookin' good, Y/N," He looked up at you with a proud grin before glancing back down at your stance. "Just bend your knees a little more and you'll be perfect."

His praise, along with his calloused palms carefully adjusting your legs made your face feel hot and you shifted on the board to correct your balance, slowly raising your arms until you were standing, albeit a little wobbly, mostly on your own. 

"Holy shit!" You yelled, the smile on your face growing more ecstatic at the encouraging cheers of your friends as they watched from the beach twenty feet away. "I'm doing it! I'm actually doing it!"

"Almost," JJ gave you another one of his killer smiles, the ones that you quickly found out made breathing normally quite the challenge, then let go of your knees to give the board a solid push forward. "Now you are!"

Frantically, you recalled everything he taught you that afternoon and managed to make it halfway to shore before you lost your balance and fell into the surf with a giddy laugh. "Guess I need a little more practice," You giggled as he splashed his way over and offered you a hand, a teasing glint in his blue eyes. 

"Just a little?"

You flicked some water at him for that and your laugh grew when he wrapped you up in his arms and spun you around before flinging you both into the waves. The others immediately ran to join you and an all out war broke out, everyone splashing each other with no holds barred.  

When he casually suggested giving you another lesson the next day as you all laid on the sand to catch your breath, you were unable to say no and the soft, dimpled smile on his face made your heart skip a beat in a way you'd never felt before. For the first time, you told the warning bells in your head to just shut the fuck up and allowed yourself to think about the future, to dream about what you could become and where you could be in two, five, even ten years. You let yourself have hope.

The next morning, you put on your favorite bikini -the green high waisted one that made your butt look good- and caught a ride with Daisy and Kelce to the beach, ignoring the teasing looks and jabs your sister sent your way and the sly smirk on her boyfriend's face. 

"Hey, Juliet, looks like your Romeo's already waiting for you." 

You rolled your eyes and hopped out of Kelce's Range Rover, flipping them both the bird behind your back without a second glance. As they drove away, their laughter followed you to where JJ was indeed waiting by the walkway to the shore, surfboard under his arm, and his face broke out into a wide grin when he laid eyes on you, one that you couldn't help returning.

"Sorry I'm late, my sister was being a bitch."

He laughed at that and reached out to take your hand, sending warm tingles through your whole body. "I was kinda worried you forgot about me, Y/N."

In a sudden burst of courage you didn't know you had, you laced your fingers with his and started pulling him toward the water as you sent him a wink over your shoulder. "I would never."

You started your lesson on the sand, reviewing how to stand up and balance on the board, before moving to the ocean. You catch your first waves on your stomach to get used to the movement and when you get comfortable with that you move to your knees and then your feet; each time JJ was there to catch you when you inevitably bit it, hugging you close to his bare chest and speaking enthusiastic words of encouragement in your ear, and with every passing try you became more and more confident until you finally nailed a small wave from beginning to end without falling on your ass. 

"I did it!" In a flash, you jumped off the board and into his arms, your mouth curving into a joyful grin when he spun you in circles like yesterday with your own arms locked tight around his neck.

"Hell yeah you did!" The proud smile on his face made your stomach do a little flip and so did the way he held you close, his hands hooked under your thighs. "You're gonna be a pro in no time."

"Well," You said, twirling your fingers in the fine blond hair at his nape and hoping you didn't just imagine the shiver that ran down his spine. "I do have a great teacher."

His pretty blue eyes locked onto yours and you couldn't look away even if you wanted to (which you absolutely didn't). You'd been reading about moments like that ever since you were a kid, alone in your room with nothing better to do than drown yourself in overly sappy fanfiction until 2 AM, so you knew all about the magnetism, the butterflies, the invisible string tying two lovers together by fate, but it was just a fantasy, a pipe dream, something to yearn for when the loneliness became too much. Never in a million years did you imagine you would ever feel like that.

And yet you did. You felt it in your whole body, coursing through your veins like liquid fire, and when JJ started to lean in, you didn't hesitate to meet him halfway. It wasn't your first kiss -that happened two years ago when you were still living in Rhode Island, during a rare party you actually got invited to and with a pretty girl in your class- but it was the first that set every single one of your nerves alight. He held you tighter against him as your hands moved to cup his face, letting him deepen the kiss with a tilt of his head and the soft swipe of his tongue against your lips. You never thought you'd find yourself in the middle of a make out session in broad daylight and in full view of everyone on the beach but there you were, not giving a single shit about who was watching. All you cared about was memorizing every detail about the way he kissed you, the feel of his mouth on yours and the heat of his palms against your thighs, the rough touch of drying saltwater on his skin under your thumbs and that little noise he made low in his throat when you wrapped your legs tighter around his waist. You could've kissed him for hours (holy shit did you want to do that) and never run out of new idiosyncrasies to notice.

You pulled back some glorious time later with a breathless smile and swollen lips, heart racing against your ribcage and forehead pressed to JJ's as he smiled back, an endearing pink flushed across his face. 

"I've wanted to do that for a while." His quiet admission made the butterflies in your stomach go haywire and you leaned down to kiss him once again, no longer able to deny yourself the happiness you longed for for years now that you'd had a taste; he returned the kiss and you laughed against his mouth as he spun you around before gently setting you on your feet in the surf, his forgotten board -thankfully still tethered to your ankle- bumping into your legs with every wave.

"Me, too." 

"Good." He shot you a smile that make you weak in the knees and tucked a wayward strand of hair behind your ear, then it was his turn to lean down to press his lips to yours.

After that day, life was practically a dream. You had the greatest friends you could've asked for, your family was the happiest you'd ever seen them, and you had a boyfriend. A loyal, affectionate, chaotic boyfriend who somehow managed to keep you on your toes while being your guiding light all at once and you wondered how you got so lucky that a boy as wonderful as JJ wanted little old you, with all of your insecurities and shattered edges and tendencies to push people away when they got too close.

You told him that one day as you laid together on your bed, sharing lazy kisses in the warm late-summer sun streaming in through your window while Fleetwood Mac played quietly from your phone resting on the nightstand. Fall was in the air and with it came cool breezes and that nagging fear in the back of your mind that screamed none of it would last. It was the first time you cried in front of him -in front of anyone other than your sister- and he held you tight to his chest, hand running soothingly over your back as you let everything out in one massive, embarrassing flood of years of pent-up emotions. 

Another thing your boyfriend was good at, you found out, was comfort. He didn't say anything as he hugged you close but he didn't need to, the fact that he was simply there and listening was all you needed from him. You spent your whole life living in the shadows until then, when he made you feel seen, heard, and important, validated, all without saying a single word and after your tears had run dry and you pulled your face away from his damp shirt, you killed that urge to flee and buried it so deep you hoped you'd never find it again. 

That day, you poured out your heart for the first time to a person you knew in your very bones you could trust and received nothing but unconditional acceptance in return. JJ took you as you were, flaws and metaphorical scars, dark secrets and past mistakes, and you weren't quite fifteen yet but you wondered if that spark you felt in your blood when he kissed you was love.

It was less than a week later when he showed up at your door late at night, bruised and bloody, and the thrill of a clandestine meeting in your room faded the second you saw the small, pained smile he sent your way. Daisy, swapping roles with you for once, distracted your parents so you could sneak him upstairs like she did with Kelce practically every week and only when you were both safely hidden away in your room did you speak, keeping your voice as soft as your touch against his bruised cheek. "What happened?"

You cried in front of him for the second time when he finally answered, after you cleaned him up with the first aid kit your mom always kept under your bathroom sink and helped him change into some of your dad's old clothes your sister swiped from the laundry room ("if you need anything, just text me, 'k?" she said and you sent her a grateful smile before she left, quietly shutting the door behind her.). JJ was your echo as he spilled all his secrets, too, bringing his demons out of the deep blue darkness and into your golden daylight where they slowly burned to ash, little by little. You held him close, your legs tangled together and his head pillowed on your chest, and you ran your fingers through his hair over and over until he talked himself hoarse and his hands loosened their white-knuckled grip on your sweatshirt. 

Words had never been your strong suit so you let your actions speak for you and gently wiped the tears from his cheeks with your thumbs, leaning down to press your lips to his forehead, then his closed eyelids, his nose, all over his face until there was no inch you hadn't kissed other than his mouth; you saved that for last, letting each delicate touch linger against his slightly chapped lips like bright beacons of light guiding him through a storm in hopes that he'll make it to shore.

"You'll always be safe with me." 

You whispered it into his hair sometime later, through swollen lips that hurt in the best possible way and you felt his slow smile into the curve of your neck, his reply coming in the form of a soft and feather-light kiss against your heated skin. You fell asleep that night with your boyfriend wrapped up in your arms, safe and warm and far away from the father who hurt him in more ways than one. 

Your parents, on the other hand, loved JJ so much to the point you thought they'd adopt him if they could, especially your dad. They were constantly inviting him over for dinner, fishing trips, movie nights: you name it, your parents wanted him there, and you were pretty sure he was spending even more time at your place than at John B's. He won the 'favorite boyfriend' category by default because Kelce barely made the 'tolerated' list, much to your and Daisy's amusement. 

Despite that fact though, you still snuck JJ out your window that morning to meet him at the front door just as your mother was leaving for her shift at the hospital. Rebekah greeted him with her customary hug before touching his bruised cheek with a gentle hand and concern in her eyes.  

"What happened, hon?" 

He shrugged, expertly bullshitting some excuse about defending your honor when one of Kelce's friends started going off about how good your ass looked and it instantly appeased your dad, who reached over to clap your boyfriend on the shoulder.

"Good job, kid." Bill said with a pleased grin, then kissed his wife goodbye and headed back down the hall toward the living room. "Hear that, Daisy? Your boy needs to get better friends!"

"Dad!"

"Even better, just get a better boy in general!"

As your father and sister squabbled, your mother pulled you both into another fierce hug and whispered "You always have a place here," before she headed out the door; JJ looked a bit stunned at Rebekah's words and you reached over to give his hand a gentle squeeze, smiling softly when he slowly did it back.

Your parents weren't stupid. They knew your boyfriend didn't come from the best of homes but they loved him anyway, showering him in ordinary, everyday affection they knew he rarely got. You noticed it more and more as the months passed: your dad always asking him for help fixing Daisy's clunker of a car when it broke down and both would come inside with grease-stained hands and easy smiles, your mom keeping all the first aid kits fully stocked and hugging him a little tighter when he looked a little worse for wear, both of them making sure he was fed and safe and cared for like he deserved. Even Daisy had a penchant for leaving snacks on your bed like some sort of food fairy and offering to give rides to the beach or the Chateau, especially after she finally dumped Kelce and had, as she said, 'nothing better to do.'

And you? You fell harder each passing day, each moment you spent with him, each kiss that made your veins hum with white hot lightning. Of course, your friends teased you mercilessly but neither of you really minded, knowing that each joke was born pure joy at seeing you both together and happy (though you never missed an opportunity to be extra affectionate in front of everyone as revenge.). JJ continued to teach you how to surf until you could hold your own with the rest of the pogues and when you turned fifteen in late spring, they gave you the surprise of your life in the form of your very own board.

You stared in shock at the sea foam green board propped in the sand beside your friends,' gaping like a fish out of water as they all screamed "happy birthday, Y/N!" at the top of their lungs.

"You...you guys -are you for real?" You reached out to run your fingers over the smooth epoxy surface, the mounting pressure behind your eyes becoming harder and harder to ignore when you caught sight of your friends' identical bright grins. What did you do to deserve them?

"We figured it was time you had your own board instead of that shitty hand me down," John B said, ruffling your hair with brotherly affection that made your heart feel full. Pope nodded enthusiastically and added, "You're gonna improve so much with this -not that you weren't already, I mean!"

"She's already good 'cause she has me for a teacher," JJ said with an overexaggerated wink as he pulled you closer and planted a kiss on your cheek. "Taught her everything she knows."

"Oh, please, you just wanted to mack-"

"Taught her how to make out-"

"What they all mean to say, Y/N," Kiara interrupted, sending the boys a pointed look, then gave your shoulder a quick squeeze, "is that we love you. That word won't kill you guys to say, you know."

"I-I love you guys, too. All of you." You admitted thickly, hastily wiping away the tears you just realized were slipping down your face. It didn't scare you to say it. You didn't feel the urge to run or pretend you didn't care for them as much as they cared for you 'cause you loved your friends like you loved your sister, your parents, and the thought filled you with joy instead of terror. "I don't know how to thank you."

You suddenly found yourself in the middle of a colossal group hug, laughing and crying at the same time as four pairs of arms all tried to wrap around you at once.  "How about you start by getting out there and showing us what you're made of?" John B said with a nod toward the ocean and you wiggled your way out of the tangle of limbs, darting forward to pull your new board from the sand.  

"Come on, slowpokes," You called over your shoulder as you jogged toward the water, "You aren't gonna let the newbie have all the fun, right?"

The water was a bit too chilly for surfing but the five of you dove in anyway and you grinned so hard you were sure your face would split in two when you nailed your first wave to the rest of the pogues' cheers. You all surfed until the cold was too much to bear before packing up and heading back to your house, where you spent the rest of your birthday surrounded by all of the people you'd ever loved, making s'mores around the campfire in your backyard. 

"I meant what I said earlier." You blurted when JJ was the only one around to hear it, the others already headed inside for the night. The two of you laid together on a blanket beside the dying fire as you stared up at the stars and when you spoke, he tore his gaze from the sky to focus on you, one eyebrow raised in the cutest confused expression you'd ever seen.

"Meant what?"

Maybe it was the look in those pretty blue eyes of his or the feel of his fingers running through your hair or your brain remembering every single moment you'd ever shared with him all at once but something screamed at you to say those words, the ones you'd been thinking about saying to his face for a long time. Though you'd already said them earlier, this time was different -so, so different- and you took a deep breath, fighting away the nerves that made your hand tremble as you cupped his face and ran your thumb over his cheekbone.

"I love you."

The funny thing about words: once they're out in the air, there's no taking them back. These words, though? You never wanted to take them back. Ever. 

"I love you, too."

It wasn't like the movies. Fireworks didn't go off, the world didn't stop spinning on its axis, nothing magically clicked into place, but you did feel the most wonderful warmth you could ever imagine slowly sinking into your bones when he said it back, the soft smile on his flushed face snatching the very breath from your lungs. He loved you. You loved him. It was simple, uncomplicated, effortless and you smiled into his kiss with the moon and stars as your witnesses. 

Summer came again, setting you and Kiara free from the hell known as the kook academy and its rich kid hierarchy and the two of you ran wild -from sunrise to sunset- with your boys at your sides, like birds escaping their cages or horses let loose in the grasslands, untamed and thirsty for adventure. It had only just begun and yet you already knew it was the best summer of your life. 

Your dad, a man able to make friends with a rock, struck up a camaraderie with Sarah's father of all people during a deep sea fishing trip and snagged five invitations to some fancy party called Midsummers. 

Kiara nearly had a coronary when you shared the news, her face lighting up like a kid on Christmas morning. "Oh, thank God!" She breathed, sitting up on her towel and pushing her sunglasses up onto her forehead. "Maybe I'll actually have a good time for once."

The two of you were relaxing on the beach, taking a break while the boys surfed and you turned away from admiring your boyfriend's bare back to look her in the eye. "So what you're saying is-"

"-it fucking sucks. Just..." She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "a bunch of bourgeoise pigs throwing a party to stroke their overinflated egos."

You groaned and flopped back onto your towel, throwing your arm over your eyes. "Great, a night of rich people being rich people."

Kiara laughed and reached over to grab a bottle of water from the cooler. "You have no idea."

Despite her misgivings, the party wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Sure, the general stench of opulence and wasted money -so much wasted money- was overbearing and quite frankly disgusting but you did your best to ignore it, focusing instead on having a great time with two of your best friends, making fun of the kooks and sneaking liquor when the adults weren't looking. One of those friends happened to be your boyfriend and you found it very, very hard to keep your eyes off him in that suit of his, with his hair slicked back in just the right way that made your knees weak; JJ couldn't stop staring at you either and you'd lost count of how many times you glanced over to find him already looking at you, something you'd never seen before behind his gaze. You wanted -needed- to find out what it was and you were hoping you would tonight, even if you didn't exactly know how. 

"Why don't you two take a picture? It'll last longer." Kiara said sarcastically and you flicked your eyes down to your lap, smoothing a non-existent wrinkle in your deep green dress to hide your embarrassment. What was it about that damn suit that made you feel so flustered?

"You know me, Kie," JJ replied, grabbing your hand and tugging you toward the dance floor. "I like to live in the moment." He grinned down at you and you couldn't help smiling back, giggling as he twirled you under his arm before pulling you close, resting his other hand low on your back.

"I didn't know you were such a good dancer," You said, letting him lead you in a simple waltz across the cool grass. 

"Well, I'm not but I might've spent the last week practicing with your sister while Kie distracted you." He admitted casually, shooting a thumbs up over your shoulder and you turned to find Daisy grinning in your direction as she swayed with some guy (Daniel, you thought, or maybe Deke? You weren't sure.) you'd seen hanging around the pool a few times. 'You're welcome,' She mouthed before spinning under her partner's arm, her wine-colored dress fanning out around her legs and you smiled wider, twirling back into your boyfriend's embrace and surging up onto your tiptoes to press your lips to his.

He dipped you low as he returned your kiss, grinning against your mouth when you flung your arms around his neck in surprise, your fingers holding tight to the collar of his suit jacket. "You did all that for me?" You asked once your feet were firmly back on the ground and your heart skipped a beat as his hands brushed the skin exposed by the low-cut back of your dress. 

"Anything for you, Y/N." 

Later, after dancing until your shoes started to dig uncomfortably into your toes, the two of you snuck down to the beach, your heels in your hands and two stolen drinks in JJ's. You felt a bit guilty ditching Kiara but from the wink she sent your way as you passed by, you were pretty sure she didn't really mind. The sand was cool on your legs through the thin layers of your skirt and yet you felt nothing but warm, both from his arm around your shoulders and the alcohol burning down your throat.

"Shit," You coughed, regretting following your boyfriend's example by knocking the whole thing back at once and playfully jabbing your elbow in his side when he outright laughed at your struggle. "I'm not used to drinking straight...whatever this is." 

"It's bourbon, babe." He took the glass from your hand and set it aside before tucking you closer against him to ward off the slight chill of the mellow ocean breeze. "Don't worry, I still love you even if you can't take shots."

"Ha ha. Love you, too, you jerk." You rested your head on his shoulder after they stopped shaking with laughter, perfectly happy to sit in silence together and watch the waves crash against the shore. A pleasant tingle flooded through your body after the bourbon finally stopped burning and you realized you liked the feeling, even if it paled in comparison to the high you reached when he kissed you, when he ran his hand through your hair, when he made it crystal clear you were loved. 

"Hey, Y/N?"

JJ's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you shifted your head to look up at him, hooking one of your ankles around his. "Yeah?"

"Gimme your hand."

You obliged, your confusion slowly melting away into something more closely resembling pure, unadulterated affection as he tied a bracelet around your wrist. And not just any bracelet, you noticed when you brought it closer to your face to examine it in the dim, distant light of the party: this one was obviously, beautifully handmade, woven with threads in shades of green, blue, and tan and tied off with two green beads on each end. You ran your thumb over a spot where the intricate motif was just a little messed up and smiled when JJ looked embarrassed, the tips of his ears turning red.

"Yeah, sorry about that, I was in a hurry and fucked up the pattern," He confessed sheepishly, spinning a similar bracelet around his own wrist. "I was gonna give it to you on your birthday but I kind of underestimated how long it took to make-"

"It's perfect." You interrupted, tackling him onto the sand with your arms around his neck as you pressed a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth, leaving a bright red lipstick mark behind. "I love it. I love you."

The smile he sent you was one of unabashed relief and he slid his fingers into your hair to pull you down for another kiss. "I love you, too."

For awhile after that, you let your lips do the talking in a different way and you made out on the beach for -surprisingly- only the second time until you rolled onto your back and accidentally got a little sand in your underwear (he laughed at that but you immediately got your revenge by stuffing a handful down the front of his shirt). You snuck back to the party hand in hand to drop off the forgotten glasses and wave a quick goodbye to Kiara, who just smirked at your smudged lipstick and the golden crown of leaves sitting crooked on your head, before walking toward your house a mile down the road. Well, JJ walked, you hitched a ride on his back when he wouldn't take no for an answer.

"Babe, your feet hurt and you have sand in your ass. No way in hell I'm letting you walk."

You just smiled against his shoulder and let him carry you the rest of the way to your house and then even up the stairs to your room as you fired off a text to Daisy letting her know where you disappeared to. She sent 'check your dresser, thank me later' with a winking emoji back and you felt your face get hot when you caught sight of the small box tucked into the corner of the drawer, quickly placing the phone facedown on your bedside table before tossing your shoes onto the floor by your closet and carefully pulling the crown from your messy hair.

"Thanks for the ride, my feet and ass are in your debt."

"Let's make out again and I'll consider that debt paid."

You laughed but gave in 'cause hell, you really wanted to keep making out, too. You pushed JJ backwards until his knees hit your bed and you ended up on his lap, your hands pushing the suit jacket off his shoulders as you leaned down to kiss him. He slid the pins from your hair one by one until it fell around your face and he tangled his fingers in it, pulling your head back so he could trail his lips down the sensitive skin of your neck and you gasped, pausing in the middle of trying to undo the bowtie around his neck.

Something shifted in the air then and you knew that once you took that next step, there'd be no turning back but you were ready to meet it head on as you finished with his tie and tossed it behind you, then started on the buttons of his shirt. That look from earlier was in his eyes again and you nodded, smiling in anticipation when you finally understood what it meant and he languidly slipped one of the straps of your dress off your shoulder. 

You bared your body like you bared your soul and soon there was no part of you that he didn't know. You learned every part of him, too and together you brought each other to a high you'd never felt before. It wasn't perfect, of course, but it was perfect to you: every awkward, beautiful touch, when you breathed his name like that for the first time, the way your hands clutched his hair like a lifeline. You were burning up from the inside out, every single nerve on fire and blazing brilliantly under your heated skin and you'd never felt more alive when you came undone in his arms.

In the afterglow, you laid wrapped up together like the woven bracelets you both wore, JJ's fingers steadily tracing the curve of your bare hip as yours soothed the darkening red mark you'd left behind on his neck. The fairy lights strung above your bed cast soft, welcoming shadows all around, highlighting that wonderful look in his eyes, open and awed and oh so loving and you knew your gaze held the same.

"I'm, I-" He started, then shook his head and leaned down to place a lingering kiss on your cheek. "I just -shit."

"Whoa, you're speechless," You teased, sweeping a wayward strand of sweaty blond hair away from his forehead. "Guess I really blew your mind, huh?"

"Fucking fried it." He shook his head again with the dopiest, dreamiest smile you'd ever seen and you giggled as he pulled you closer, calloused palm flat against the small of your back. "I'm so fucking in love with you. Straight up head over heels, babe." 

You smiled even wider at his words and how they ignited that flame burning inside you once again. "Good thing I'm fucking head over heels, hopelessly in love with you, too." You replied and pushed him back onto the bed, swinging a leg over his thighs so you were the one on top this time. "And I'm gonna blow your damn mind again."

You weren't sure what you expected life to be like after you had sex for the first time. You'd always heard it was this momentous occasion, that you'd suddenly feel like a real woman or whatever stupid label society came up with to further control girls and their sexuality but honestly, you still felt like the same person. All those rom-coms and their jokes about having that look after getting laid were total and complete bullshit, you realized; to you, sex was just a different, more intimate way to show your love and you just happened to like showing it often (and luckily JJ did, too). You flaunted it in other ways, too, his bandanas tied in your hair and shirts in your closet, your necklaces resting against his collarbone and bracelets you learned to make around his wrists, but there was nothing like the marks you left on each other's skin -necks, inner arms, hipbones- when you were alone together in the dark.

Life went on. Months flew by and things were nearly perfect for you: great friends, good grades, a wonderful relationship with your loving boyfriend. The girl of your past, the one who kept to herself and avoided anything that had to do with being vulnerable like the plague was dead and gone and in her place was the person you always wanted to be. You were happy -ridiculously, deliriously happy- sixteen and so in love with the life you built that you'd almost forgotten about your mom's tendency to relocate your family every few years; that nagging thought was still in the back of your mind but you refused to let it control your life with fear of losing everything -everyone- you'd come to love.

But you knew how the saying went: the bigger you are, the harder you fall.

The higher you climb on an unstable mountain, the more it hurts when it inevitably crumbles beneath you. 

Your mountain didn't just crumble: it was violently torn apart, ripped into pieces by a devastating earthquake, a destructive landslide caused by the one person who promised she wouldn't hurt you anymore but the catalyst that unintentionally set it in motion came from someone you never expected: your sister.

Daisy graduated from the kook academy and got accepted into her dream school, UCLA, alongside her boyfriend Daniel (see, you knew his name wasn't Deke) but you didn't think too much of it. After all, you knew that day would come eventually, the day your big sister would head off to college and leave you, her shadow, behind but the thought didn't fill you with dread like it used to. You had friends, a found family to soothe the inescapable sting of the Daisy-shaped hole in your heart and keep your spirits high when she hopped on that plane to California in the fall.

You still had the summer though and you made it count, days spent with your friends and nights spent with your sister, doing all the things you used to do together when you were little; watching movies, playing games, making a total mess in the kitchen when you baked batches and batches of cookies that had both your boyfriend and hers always hanging around like dogs begging for scraps. You and Daisy started putting them to work the second they ate two dozen snickerdoodles by themselves (Daniel was an excellent cook while JJ was a total disaster) and those nights always ended with the four of you squished together on the couch, wrapped in blankets and cookies and warmth while a scary movie played on in the background. 

The day before Daisy left for LA, you met your parents and sister at The Wreck for what you thought would be your last family dinner until Thanksgiving break but it turned out you were the only one who believed that. You should've known something was wrong the second your dad didn't even make a joke about your friends dropping you off in John B's rust bucket of a van or when JJ pulled you back in for a kiss that was just a little bit too risque for the public eye (You'd laughed when John B and Pope both pretended to gag and just kissed him harder, not giving a single shit about who saw, even your parents.). You should've known when your mother's smile was a little strained or when your sister wouldn't meet your eyes. You should've known but you stupidly didn't see the signs and that made Rebekah's words so much harder to swallow.

"We're moving to California."

You dropped the loaded nacho in your hand back onto your plate as you stared at her, gaping like a fish. "E-Excuse me but what the actual fuck?"

"Language, Y/N." 

"I don't give a shit about my language, Mom, I give a shit about the fact that you broke your promise!" You hissed, roughly pushing your plate away and almost knocking your glass of water over. 

"Sweetheart-"

"You promised." 

Your mother winced at the tightness of your voice and how you snatched your clenched fist out from under her hand. "I know, dear, but I couldn't pass on this offer and I know how much you're going to miss your sister-"

"Yeah, I'll miss Daisy but I don't want to move across the country just to be near her! God, let her be her own person for once!"

"Y/N-"

"And what about me, huh? I'm happy here! This is my home! I have friends, a boyfriend -I'm not leaving!"

"Honey, I understand you're upset-"

"Do you?" You interrupted your dad with a bitter laugh, fighting the tears you felt pricking at your eyes. "Do you understand what you're forcing me to lose?"

Bill looked away as Kiara arrived with your food and set the plates down in awkward silence. You gave her a tight smile when she quickly patted your back and then returned to the kitchen, sending you a concerned glance over her shoulder before she disappeared through the double doors and you turned to face Daisy. 

"Day, did you know?" Your sister avoiding your sudden, sharp gaze was all the answer you needed and your heart dropped like an anchor, weighing heavy on your stomach. You felt sick. You felt furious. But most of all, you felt betrayed.  

Suddenly, the sight of your favorite meal in front of you wasn't so appetizing anymore and you abruptly stood, your chair scraping roughly against the floor. Heads turned to look in your direction but you ignored their curious stares as you snarled with all the venom you could muster across the table at your mother, "I knew I never should've trusted a word you said."

You turned away from her hurt expression -the sheer audacity she had, acting like she was the one whose heart was shattering- and ran out the front door of The Wreck before anyone could stop you, pretending not to hear their voices calling after your retreating back. You didn't know where your feet were taking you but you really didn't care, just as long as it was far, far away from your family.

You ran until your aching legs forced you to stop and you doubled over, hands on your thighs as you tried to catch your breath and it wasn't until you saw the water dripping onto the sidewalk beneath you did you realize you were crying. Footsteps slowed to a stop beside you and your braced yourself to hear Daisy's apology or worse, your mother's, but got Kiara's winded voice instead.

"Did you ever think about doing cross country? 'Cause holy shit," She gasped with her hands on her hips. "You can run." 

Despite feeling like your whole fucking world was falling apart around you, you still managed a snort of laughter at your friend's remark and eagerly returned her embrace when she wrapped her arms around your shoulders, burying your face against her neck. She held you as you cried, running a soothing hand up and down your back until the rest of your friends pulled up in the Volkswagen and you found yourself crying on a different shoulder, one you knew better than your own. 

The white hot fury had left your body and now all you felt was numb. Numb and empty and hollow as you quietly explained everything on the ride back to the Chateau, avoiding your friends' sympathetic stares by playing with a loose thread at the bottom of JJ's shirt. He ran a hand through your hair while you leaned against him and you let his touch slowly bleed life back into your heart. 

"You're not leaving, okay? My parents love you so you can stay with me." Kiara declared later as you all lounged around the bonfire, passing a joint back and forth.

"Or me. My dad would probably let you stay if you helped out around the shop," Pope piped up, handing it over to you without taking a drag as John B added, "Me, too. We have an extra room."

"Tijuana's always nice, too, babe." JJ suggested, grabbing your hand holding the joint and bringing it to his mouth so he could take a hit. "Just a thought."

You smiled softly and took your own hit, slowly blowing smoke into the air. "You guys are the best. I doubt my parents'll change their minds...but I guess it wouldn't hurt to try." It would definitely hurt if your desperate bid to stay didn't work but you tried not to think about that and focused instead on having a good time with your friends, forgetting all about your phone that was switched to silent and burning a hole in your purse. 

Later, after the others headed inside for the night and it was just you and JJ left, you were reminded of your fifteenth birthday. You'd laid like you were now, on a blanket under the stars beside a dying fire and you told him you loved him for the first time and as much as it tore you apart to know it might all come to an end, you didn't regret it. You didn't regret befriending Kiara back in eighth grade or letting the pogues become so important to you or falling so hard for the boy holding you in his arms. And right then, all you wanted to do was hold onto that feeling by showing him your love and getting loved in return. 

You propped yourself up on your elbow and leaned down to kiss him, your other hand slipping under his shirt in the flickering glow of the flames and you smiled against his lips when he immediately rolled onto his back so you were on top, his hand doing some exploring of its own under your sundress.  

"I don't want to feel anything but you tonight." You answered the question in his eyes when you broke apart some time later, both breathing heavily with your skirt hitched up over your thighs and his shirt tossed somewhere on the grass behind you. "Please."

"Here?"

You'd never fucked outside before but you figured now would be the perfect time to try and to be honest, you were too impatient to make it to a bed so you nodded, slowly rolling your hips against his. "Right here."

You lost yourself in the ardent touch of his calloused hands with the haze of smoke hanging in the cool night air, letting everything slip away until he was the only thing that remained. He was all you needed, tan skin slick with sweat and mouth searing hot, your nails trailing scratches down his back while your lips left smudged marks of blood red on his face. He took you higher and higher, doing exactly what you asked him to, over and over until you nearly forgot your own name and when you finally came back down, he held you close until your limbs stopped shaking and your heart slowed back to its normal rhythm.

"I don't want to lose you." You admitted quietly into the dark, wiping at a stubborn lipstick stain on the corner of his mouth and your thumb caught on his lip when JJ shook his head, then leaned down to drop a kiss at your hairline.

"You won't."

You wanted to believe him so badly it hurt but you didn't know if you could so instead you threaded your fingers through his hair and pulled him down to press your mouth to his, his cheek, his jawline, everywhere you could reach, drowning yourself in the right now in hopes that the future would never come. 

"I love you, Y/N. Don't you dare forget it." He whispered it against the shell of your ear before trailing his lips down your neck and the light scrape of his teeth on your skin turned your voice into a breathless sigh as you repeated his words into the air, your back arching from the blanket when he hit a particularly sensitive spot and sent electricity racing through your veins. You may have spoken your love softly but you showed it fiercely, each touch a little harder than the last, each kiss a little rougher and together you burned through the dark like a funeral pyre.

Hope was a dangerous thing to feel; it was fragile and delicate, hard to keep but oh so easy to lose for someone like you, a girl who spent her whole life searching for a home, only to have it ripped away when she finally found it. It didn't matter what you said or how much you cried or even when Kiara and her parents advocated on your behalf, your time on the island was up and just like that, whatever hope you had left disappeared into thin air and left you wondering if you'd ever get it back again.

-

tagging some mutuals who might be interested: @sinkbeneathwaves​ @jiaraendgame​ @sunnypogue​ @alexa-playafricabytoto​ @maybanks​

[birdsandspades]

I Was Never Good at Waiting (Sugawara x Reader) Chapter 14

- It was your last year in highschool, everything had been going smoothly until you got assigned the new teacher. Sugawara Koushi was handsome, maybe too handsome for his own good. Be he wasn’t flirting with you right, teachers shouldn’t do that….I guess we will see where this year goes.

Word Count - 7,451

-Does this have spelling errors, yes. Did I try to proof read this, yes. Do I have work in a few hours, yes. Also tumblr hates my old gif so I guess we're switching it.

----

You could only read a sentence so many ways. Forwards, backwards, skipping every other word as if some hidden message was hiding between the white lines.

“Sugawara told me you needed a fake boyfriend for the day and gave me your number for the details. What time do you need me to show up at the station tomorrow?”

It was a well written text message, all the words fully typed out. This was definitely not from anyone of your slightly illiterate classmates.

The area code belonged to one of the Tokyo subdivisions. The same three Iwa-chan had while he was going to school at Tokyo university. Maybe whoever this was attended the school as well?

You chewed on your lip in tandem with the blinking of your text cursor. You had to reply but with what?

“Maybe Koushi is awake.” You scrolled through your recent calls, tapping on his contact. The phone sat silent for a moment before ringing once, twice, three times. No answer. His voicemail droned on as you looked into the dark kitchen.

“Hi you’ve reached Sugawara Koushi, i’m not able to answer right now. If you leave me a message i’ll…” You ended the call, watching as the screen closed and the message opened back up.

Something was turning, working away as you started at the phone icon that sat next to the unknown number.

“His voicemail will have his name!” You had reached your aha moment as you dialed the number, lifting the phone to your ear. You could be smart when you wanted to be.

No answer, not much to your surprise, it was in fact very late. You waited for the voicemail as you slid to the edge of the sofa seat.

“I’m sorry, but the person you called has a voice mailbox that has not been set up yet. Goodbye.”

You pulled the phone away from your ear slowly, carefully setting in on the coffee table. Turning to the side you threw your head into the sofa cushion and screamed.The universe could give you a break, maybe even a little crack. Bend just a little bit?

You had no plan A, or B, or C at this point. And despite not wanting to rely on a complete stranger to dig you out of yet another one of your problems, Sugawara had put a plan in place at some point in your evening. A poorly set up plan, but something nonetheless.

You sat back up and grabbed your phone again. You would just text him and wait, hope that he got it and showed up. Eight hours was plenty of notice right?

“We will be at the Tokyo station at noon tomorrow, i’ll be waiting at the plaza water fountain just outside the entrance.”

Sent.

It was now a waiting game as you set the phone down beside you. You head tilting back till it met the plush top of the sofa back. You watched the ceiling fan turn, counting the seconds as you waited for any kind of response. Five minutes turned to ten, ten to thirty, and soon enough it had been an hour. Whatever came after was forgotten as your lids inched shut, the burning in your eyes too much to suffer through.

Whatever anxiety you had sunk to the back of your mind as you finally got your break, some uninterrupted sleep.

---

You sat up, rubbing your eyes as you looked around the dark living room. Your phone chimed on the seat next to you, the bright screen making you squint. You felt for the device, lifting it up as you yawned.

“One missed call from :Tooru (#1 Senpai) Oikawa”

You redialed the number, lifting the phone to your ear as you stood up. You could see the light bleeding through your blinds as you walked over to the window, with one tug of the string beside them the room was flooded. You stretched, shifting the phone to your other ear as the ringing stopped and the voicemail beeped.

“Sorry but I can’t make it to the phone right now, if this is in regards to any events or games please call my agent. Bye!” Tooru’s voice chimed on the other end.

“Hi, sorry I just woke up. Call me back when you get this?” You hung up, the screen illuminating again with another call.

You clicked on it, raising it again to your ear. “Hey, good morning.”

“You mean good afternoon.” Yua corrected.

You smiled, shaking your head as you turned to look into the kitchen. You squinted, trying to make out the red numbers on the stove clock. Ten...twenty...four….

“It's not noon yet Yua, it's only 10:30.”

“Yeah and the train leaves at 11:00…” She went silent, as did you.

“Oh my god...Oh my god!” You screamed into the phone as she pulled the speaker away from her own ear.

“See you in thirty early worm.” She chuckled as she hung up the phone, you needed all the time you could get.

You looked at the time again, thirty minutes was hardly enough time to get to the station, let alone get ready for an entire date (date?).

You took a deep breath before running up the stairs. You would have to cut out the non essential things. Showering, makeup, brushing your hair, probably not going to happen. You slid to a stop at the bathroom door, taking a step back to look at yourself in the mirror. Maybe you could find time to brush your hair.

---

You could not describe the mess your room was in as you closed the door behind you twenty minutes later, toothbrush still in your mouth as you jumped down the stairs.

“Shoes, where did I put my stupid shoes?” You groaned as you reached under the coffee table.

You pulled one out, throwing it by the door as you ducked back under the wooden table to grab the other. Your phone buzzing in your pocket startled you as you bumped your head on the underside of the table.

“Ow…” You rubbed the sore spot as you pulled the other shoe out. Today was already off to a bad start.

“Almost ready, almost ready.” You chanted as you made your way to the door, like a mantra to trick your brain into a false sense of security as you shoved your foot into your sneakers.

You were looping the laces on your shoes when Yua called again.

Your brain was doing well with one thing at a time, as most brains tended to do. But the vibration in your hand pulled all focus away from your already clumsy half standing shoe tying, your left foot coming down on the still unlooped laces of your right. You tried to pick up the foot, one foot, the wrong foot. Your right foot raised up, the bunge of the laces toppling you over in the doorway as you tried to answer the phone.

You picked your previously floor planted face and glowered at the phone, the vibrations mirroring the tingling in your knees.

You rolled over, lifting the phone to your ear.

“Ten minutes, the train leaves in ten minutes Y/N!” Yua warned.

“Yeah, i’m like almost there.” You mumbled, phone sandwiched between your shoulder and cheek as you moved the toothbrush still in your mouth over. You finished tying your shoes before standing back up.

Yua laughed, she knew you were lying. “I can’t understand you, just make sure you're on the train.” She ended the call, leaving your line silent.

You grabbed your bag and coat off the hangers, and pulled the front door open. Leaning back in to set your toothbrush on the door side bench, you would put it up later. Trading your phone for your keys, you fished them out of your bag and locked the door behind you.

You ran down your porch steps, scanning over the now empty driveway. Sugawara’s car was gone.

“He must have come early in the morning to get it…” You shrugged, you would ask him later.

You ran. Down the sidewalk, across the busy street, and over the bridge that led to the station opening. You stopped for no one as you pushed your way through the crowds on the platform. You had turned a fifteen minute walk into a six minute sprint, a new record.

You squeezed down the station stairs, your train just up ahead. You could see Yua from the door opening, a seat open next to her. She waved at you to hurry, her attention on the overhead speakers. You could hear the announcement, the train doors were about to close.

The door inched shut as you jumped off the platform and onto the now departing train. The doors sealed behind you as the overhead announced the train exiting the station.

You bent over, hands on your knees as you fought to catch what breath you had left. Yua’s growing laughter hid under your uneven pants, peaking between each thump in your ear.

“Wow, I don’t think I've ever seen you run so fast.” She tried her best to stifle her laughs, the passengers around watching you both with curiosity.

You looked up between the strands of hair, glaring at the hand she offered you.

“Miss?” A man walked over, looking between you and the train door. He reached behind you, pulling at the back of your coat, the tail end stuck between the tightly sealed doors. You could see the other end flapping in the wind through the glass window, a little flag of defeat.

Yua broke again, her laughs echoing around the train as the man tugged at the stuck material. Today was the day, you were going to actually kill her.

You slid the coat off your shoulders, letting it fall back onto the door. You thanked the man as he walked back to his seat, his sullen look matching your own. He had at least tried.

“I hate you.” You groaned, taking the seat beside Yua.

“And I brought you a coffee.” She handed you the warm cup, her smile matching it. “I had a feeling a superstar like you would be up late last night.”

You took the cup, your frown leveling out as you took a drink.

“You changed your hair.” You mused, looking over the vibrant dye.

“Oh yeah, I wanted something new and I figured I would surprise you.” Yua touched her now blue bob, twirling the front strands around her finger.

“You look like a blueberry.” You teased. You liked it, it fit her better then blonde.

“You look like you didn’t even brush your hair.” She pushed you, sitting back in her seat. She knew what you meant, she always did.

You smiled, leaning into her. “I hate you.”

“So how was the concert last night, did Ryu do a ten minute solo this time?” She took the cup from your hands and took a drink.

“It went well, it sold out.” You chuckled, taking the coffee back.

“One day when you're famous will you write a song about me?” She grinned the same gummy smile she always gave you.

“Yeah, i’ll call it “Yua: The Gremlin of Aoba Johsai.”

She pushed you again, rolling her eyes. “I hope you don’t talk to your boyfriend like that.”

“I’m meaner.” You deadpanning, the corners of your mouth turned up as she tried her best to hide her own smile.

“Are you excited to meet him?”

You nodded, the uneasy feeling setting back into your stomach.

“Don’t worry, today is going to be great.” She reassured you, placing her hand over your own.

“Yeah, i’m sure it will be.” You returned her smile, hopefully she was still this happy when the day was over.

You took your phone out of your pocket, no notifications. You had checked during your mid morning panic, but had gotten nothing from Sugawara or your mystery date today. You were starting to doubt there would even be a “boyfriend” to meet.

---

The train pulled into the station, the speakers announcing your stop. You stood up and grabbed the arm of your coat, the doors parting as you pulled the creased fabric out.

You followed the line out, walking over to an open spot along the far wall. You slide your coat back on, the crease smoothing out as you zipped it closed.

Yua reached out, straightening your collar. “Where is he meeting us?”

“The fountain.” You tried to push her hands away, her grip on your collar tightening.

“Stop, let me fix you.” She aggressively pulled at your coat, jiggling you back and forth.

“Ok mom.” You grab her wrists, prying her off of you.

“Ah sorry, it's just. You got so big so fast!” She wipes away a fake tear, chasing after you as you walk up the station stairs.

“I hate you.” You groan, holding the station door open.

You walked together to the fountain nestled in the middle of the plaza. It was busy, groups walking around the park that surrounded the stone circle. It was a popular meetup spot for the area. The perfect walking distance between the university, the train station, and the central hub of the city.

“See him?” Yua nudged you, pulling your eyes away from a group across the park.

You looked around the area, no single person separated from their groups. Whoever was supposed to meet you wasn’t there yet.

You shook your head, leaning against the cold brick of the fountain. The day was warm, pleasant on the exposed skin of your hands. It was the last of the mild weather, the heat of the days increasing as June approached.

Japan had a beautiful way of changing seasons, easing into everything just a bit later than the rest of the world. Right now you were on the cusp of spring and summer, the days melding together as the temperature changed. September the air would cool down, the trees' leaves fading into warmer hues. Snow would cover the barren branches in December, coating the country in white.

School would break then for a few days, giving the students rest for the final term. You would return in January, and the flowers would follow suit in March. You would graduate with the buds, the flowers blooming for a new class.

School broke for about a month after March, the longest break the school would give. You jokingly called it summer break, the closest thing you would get in the Japanese school system. It was the best time to get a part time job, and that's just what you did last year.

You wondered what you would do once you graduated, what that last summer break would be like. It would be the last chance to see your friends, spend time like this before everyone would leave for school.

You had been lost in thought for a bit by the look on Yua’s face. Her hand waving you back to reality.

“Hey, he’s gonna show up. Maybe he’s just late.” She smiled, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Yeah, he’s probably just late…” You returned the sweet gesture. You had never gotten a reply, with your luck whoever had texted you decided not to come.

Yua looked behind you, tilting her head up. “Can we help you?”

“You could have texted me a little earlier last night F/N.”

You turned around, eyes traveling up the tall man in front of you. “Tsukishima?”

Yua looked between the two of you, her confusion growing each time.

“Tsukishima!” You smiled, shouting a little louder than intended. You wrapped your arms around him, his body tensing at the sudden contact.

He leaned down, wrapping an arm around you as he hovered by your ear. “You may want to try better than that if you want to convince her.” He harshly whispered in your ear, smiling at your friend behind you.

“Well maybe you should have included a name in your message if you were planning on never texting me back.” You gritted your teeth.

Tsukishima laughed, pulling away from the shared hug. He dug his fingers into your skin, pinching your side before walking to greet Yua.

“I’m Tsukishima Kei.” He reached a hand out, the same smile still plastered on his face.

Yua grabbed his hand, shaking it energetically. “I’m Okada Yua. Wow you're a lot better looking than I thought you would be.”

Tsukishima nodded, pulling his hand away. “Thank you?”

“I just thought you would be bald...and creepy.” She smiled, unaware of her backhanded compliment.

“Ok, with that what should we do?” You clapped your hands together, ready to get the day over with.

“I know a cafe at the end of the park, are you two hungry?” Tsukishima placed a hand on your back, guiding you down the pathway.

He was different, something slightly off with the smile that had remained on his face. He wasn’t this sweet last night was he? His dark haired friend had all the charm.Tsukishima, he had the wit.

Yua chatted with him as you walked together, laughing at whatever joke he had said. You instead bore a hole into the side of his face, brows knitting together.

“F/N, are you ok?” He questioned, tilting his head. That same fake sweetness drenching his tone.

“I’m fine.” You smiled, shaking your head.

His eye twitched slightly, the smallest falter in his appearance. “This is it.” He held open the door to the cafe, watching as you walked in behind Yua.

“Hi, can we get a table for three please.” Tsukishima smiled at the lady behind the counter, his hand on your shoulder as the door behind you shut with a jingle.

“Of course.” She nodded, walking out from behind her post.

You craned your neck to look behind you at the tall blonde, his smile wavering once the hostess had led Yua off. “Walk?” He nodded forward and gave you a push.

“Rude.” You grumbled as Yua took a seat at a small table nestled in the window lit corner of the cafe.

“Is this ok?” The hostess smiled, looking between you and the man beside you.

“It’s perfect for a first date.” Tsukki nodded, forcing a grin as he gave you another push into the booth.

Yua audibly awed at the sentiment as she wiggled in her seat, “How cute, I'm going to throw up.”

Tsukki slid in next to you as he rolled his eyes, he hated this as much as you did.

“Have whatever you want, my treat.” He handed you a menu.

“You don’t have to Kei-san, Yua eats a lot…” You protested, a foot connecting with your shin.

“Let your sweet boyfriend pay for us.” Yua scolded through a forced smile.

“It’s no problem. It’s the least I can do for buying her a ticket to come see me.” Tsuki looked down at you, his shoulder brushing against yours. “Call me Tsukki F/N, you don't need to be so formal.” He joked. He played his part well.

Your cheeks grew hot, you hated the thought of being so informal with someone you hardly knew ,“Tsukki…”

“How did you both meet?” Yua interrupted, surely saving you from the awkward encounter. “First date nerves”, she thought.

“One of her concerts. I have a few classes with Ryu so he introduced us.” Tsukki nodded, turning his attention away from you.

“You go to college right?” Yua added, setting down her menu.

“Yeah, just across the way at Tokyo University.”

“Wow, that's expensive! What are you going for?”

“Undecided.”

“Well what are your interests, do you have hobbies?”

You could see his smile falter at the barrage of questions from Yua, her interest in the last waning as she asked another cluster.

“Sorry to interrupt, can I order anything for you?” The waitress smiled, book in hand as she looked around the table.

Yua listed off her feast as Tsukishima leaned over your shoulder to look at the menu still in your hand.

“Iced mango tea please.” He looked back at you as you shifted nervously in your seat.

“One iced americano please.” You attempted to hand the menu back to her, slightly leaning over Tsukishima as you looked at him to move over. He leaned back in his seat, a smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. You frowned, leaning further over his large frame to give the menu back.

A glass tipped over a few tables over, the patron cursing under their breath. “I’ll put these in for you.” The host nodded before excusing herself to help clean up the spilled drink.

You sat back in your seat, glaring at Tsukki as you scooted towards the window.

“I’m going to use the restroom, you two enjoy some alone time.” Yua wink, sliding out of the booth.

You watched her disappear behind the bathroom door before turning to Tsukki. “Thank you for coming today but you don’t need to be so…”

“Sweet?” Tsukki interrupted.

“Fake.” You corrected, “You weren't even this happy last night…”

“Sugawara-san told me to play the part.” He smiled, pinching at your cheek.

You pushed his hand away, “What else did he tell you?”

“A good amount, he's a chatty drunk.”

A younger man walked up to the table, drinks and treats in hand as he set each one down in front of you.

“Thank you.” Tsukki nodded before turning back to you.

“How chatty?” You questioned, the amused look painting it's way over his features told you enough.

“Excited for volleyball nationals? How about that English test last week? He says you got an A. But you forgot a few commas, you may want to pay attention to that.”

You let your head fall on the table as you groaned, “Did he tell everyone?”

“No, I was the only one who bothered to listen.” He lifted the tea filled glass to his lips, nodding towards Yua coming out of the bathroom.

Her eyes lit up as she sat back down, “This all looks so good, thank you Tsukki!”

His nose wrinkled at the informalities, “Of course.”

“How is it?” He turned towards you as you took a sip of your drink.

“It’s good.” You return his smile, looking over the tall boy's features for the first time that day.

He was in his own ways very handsome, his soft blond hair tousled, falling just below his eyes. The sun shined in just the right way on the sparse auburn highlights that framed the pieces, the lightest shade of strawberry blonde.

He gave you a quizzical look, eyes shining behind the thick rims of his glasses. They were golden, sparkling in the rays of soft yellow sunlight that tinted the entire cafe.

He reminded you of the golden hour, when the sun dipped just enough below to horizon to paint the world in golden yellows.

“You didn’t order anything to eat?” He waved the waitress over again, “You’ll get a stomach ache if you just drink coffee all day.” He nodded for you to order something else as she pulled out her book.

“Ah i’m fine really…” You contested, trying to excuse the waitress.

“Strawberry shortcake?” He looked at Yua as she nodded. “One strawberry shortcake please.”

“Tsukki you didn’t need to get me anything else.” You frowned as she disappeared to put in your order.

“Of course I did, I can’t have my love feeling sick all day.” Tsukki smoothed over your hair, his long fingers trailing down the side of your jaw to turn your flustered gaze towards him.

“T-tsukki!” You stammered pushing his hand away as he chuckled.His personality was killing all the admiration you had for him.

“Cute.” He beamed, before looking over his shoulder.

“Here you go.” The same young boy smiled as he set down your cake.

“Oh, thank you!” You bowed slightly as the boy took his leave.

“Once you finish we can go do anything you like.” Tsukishima pushed the plate towards you as his arm layed around the back of your seat.

“I know he's trying to be convincing but he could lay it on a little less thick.” You shifted slightly as his hand ghosted over your shoulder.

“This has to be some of the best cake i’ve ever had. Do you come here a lot Tsukki?” Yua asked through a mouth of coffee cake.

“Once or twice a week when I need a quiet place to study. This place is open 24 hours a day so it’s pretty nice late at night.”

“Wow, we don’t have anything like that. Maybe I should come here for college.” Yua proclaimed as you took a bite of cake.

“Yua do you think your grades are good enough?” You tease, pushing your foot against her own under the table as she pouted.

“How is your cake?” Tsukishima questions as you cut off another bite.

“It’s good, do you want some?” You slid the plate towards him, he is paying for it after all.

“Sure.” He smiles, leaning over you to take the bite off your fork.

Your froze, fork still in midair as you made eye contact with the shrewd man. The entertainment he got from your expectation was telling enough as to why he was doing this.

Yua’s phone buzzed on the table top suddenly, “Oh excuse me, i’ll meet you guys outside.”

She got up from the table, answering the call as she nodded a thank you to the host and walked out the door.

“Finish you cake.” Tsukishima nudged you, as he got up from the table. “I’m gonna go pay.”

You looked at your fork before setting it down, you hated him.

A few moments later Tsukki came back, sliding in beside you.

You pushed the last bite of cake toward him, frowning at the still apparent smirk on his face.

“Oh don’t be so upset, I was only teasing.” He shook his head as he took the last bite. “Flustering you was a bonus, I only wanted to see if I could agitate him more.”

You looked at the blond confused, “Who?”

“You mean you didn’t know he was coming today?” It was now his turn as his brows knitted together. He snorted, covering his mouth to stifle the laughs.

You shook your head slowly, it just wasn’t clicking. Tsukki sighed and nodded for you to look behind him.

Sitting up slightly you looked at the hat clad man sitting alone by the bathroom door, phone in hand as he flipped through an app. He turned around slightly, hazel eyes meeting your own as he looked back down at his lap.

“What is that idiot doing?” You questioned, leaning over to get a better look at your boyfriend sinking into his oversized jacket.

“Hiding.” Tsukki jokes, his finger tapping on the phone laying on the table before you.

You unlock it, dialing Sugawara. Both of your eyes glued on the incognito man.

He’s phone vibrated, startling him as he jumped in his seat before quickly ignoring the call.

Tsukishima shook his head, before slipping out of the booth. “Let's give him his privacy.”

You nod, picking up your phone to end the call. The notification screen popping back up as you notice another missed call.

“One missed call from :Tooru (#1 Senpai) Oikawa”

“When did he call?” You question, redialing his number for the second time that day. You slid out of the booth, following Tsukishima out of the cafe as the phone rang.

No answer.

You listen to his voicemail, giving Yua a small smile as she looks over at you.

“Sorry I missed you again. Just call me when you get this, or text me...I hope you're having a good day senpai.” You ended the call before walking over to your friends.

“Was the Oikawa-senpai?” Yua questioned as she looked over your face.

“Yeah. He called me this morning too but didn’t leave a message that time either.” You thought back to the late night call you had gotten from him before, it wasn’t unlike him to randomly call you. But never that late and never without a message.

“Do you want to keep trying him?” Tsukki was no stranger to Oikawa or his strange ways, but he could tell from the look on your face that whatever had been bothering you wasn’t a new issue.

“No, it’s ok. I don’t want to keep you guys waiting.” You wave them off, turning up the volume on your phone before putting it back in your pocket.

“Ok.” Tsukki gives you a strange look, his golden eyes unreadable.

“Well what do you guys want to go do?” Yua beams, leaning between the both of you.

“Tsukishima you live over here, is there anything you want to do?” You smile, his eyes softening.

“Not really.” He shrugs.

Yua points to the banner peeking out between the trees of the park, “That looks fun.”

You shift over to see the words boldly written across the white fabric, “New dinosaur exhibit from the United States”

You mouth the words, eyes lighting up at you turned towards and equally bright eyed Tsukki.

He coughed, turning around to hide the growing blush crossing his cheeks as you took a step back.

“We can go if you want Tsukki.”

“I don’t care, whatever you want.” He cleared his throat, avoiding your curious gaze.

“Cute.” You teased, as he pushed you away from him.

“Lets just go.” He grumbles, walking ahead of you.

---

“Wow Tsukki look!” You beamed, pulling him over to another fossilized skeleton of some long dead lizard. “I think this one kinda looks like you.” You teased, pointing to the long neck.

“Think we're distant cousins?” He smiled, stretching his neck out.

You laughed, covering your mouth as groups walking by starred.

“Only if F/N is related to that frilly looking one over there.” Yua added as Tsukishima chuckled.

You fixed your eyes on the familiar hat behind Tsukishima, tucked behind a pillar close to the museum exit. Sugawara had been following close behind the three of you all night, ducking behind exhibits each time you came close.

“I’m going to use the bathroom, i'll meet you both by the exit.” You excused yourself as the other two continued on the prehistoric tour.

You made your way around the opposite side of the pillar, Sugawara looking out the other way as he moved to follow your existing group. You snuck up behind him, looking around him as he scanned to check if it was clear to come out.

“Hi Koushi.” You smiled, looking up at the distracted man.

“Hi F/N.” He looked at you before turning back to the mission at hand, he couldn't let you get too far now could he?

“I like your hat, where did you get it?” You mused, this man was oblivious.

“A gift.” He answers your briefly before spinning around. “Hi!” He chuckles loudly, startled by how close you had gotten.

“What are you doing Koushi?” You tilt your head, an amused smile adoring your face.

“I wanted to make sure your date went well!.” He waved his hands in defense, taking a step back.

You wrapped your hands around his wrist, pulling him back behind the pillar. “And why would you need to do that?”

“Because drunk me worries a lot less than sober me…” He sighs in defeat, what use was it hiding from you. He couldn’t just sit at home while you were on a date with another guy, fake or not.

You groan, rolling your eyes, “ Koushi someone could see you.”

“Well tell Tsukki to stop touching you so much and I wouldn't need to be chaperoning this date.” He huffed in reply, folding his hands over his chest.

“He’s just trying to convince Yua.” You couldn’t help but smile, jealous Sugawara was your favorite.

“Yeah he’s trying something…” He looked away, cheeks growing red at your gaze.

“You're ridiculous, I have to go. Try not to let Yua see you ok?” You stood up on your tiptoes, pushing his hat up enough to press a quick kiss to his cheek before leaving.

He put a hand over the warm spot, throwing his head back as he groaned. He grumbled to himself as he walked off, he might as well try to beat you home at least.

---

“Hey sorry!” You looked between the two as they turned away from their conversation.

“Was it the coffee?” Yua frowned.

“I did tell you to eat.” Tsukki added, chuckling as you smack his arm.

“I hate you both.” You whined, Yua giggling.

“The train is gonna be at the station in about thirty minutes, I think we should head back.” Yua pointed to the clock in the center of the museum, nodding towards the sun setting just [ast the tree line.

“Wow, is it already seven?” You looked at her wide eyed as Tsukki nodded.

“We can cut through the park, the station is just on the other side.”

You followed him and Yua out of the museum, falling behind as you looked down at your illuminated phone.

“It’s Tooru, I'll catch up.” You waved them off as you lifted the phone to your ears.

---

Oikawa looked up at your door, taking a deep breath before shifting the bouquet of flowers to his other hand. He tapped on your door lightly before taking a step back.

Your lights were on in your bedroom, the soft yellow peeking out of the white curtains. He stood on his tiptoes as he watched for some kind of movement behind them.

His anxiety grew as he sank back down on the balls of his feet, nervously chewing on his lip as he reached to knock on your door one more time, this one a bit louder.

He had tried to call you, but for some reason most of them weren't going through. The few that did were never picked up.

He didn’t want to confess to you over a voicemail, and his nerves were too much to leave a coherent message on why he was calling you in the first place.

“Where are you?” He questioned, knocking again on the door. Readjusting the bouquet in his hands he straightened his back and watched the door again.

He knew you were off from practice today, only because he drove by the school three times to check. Were you asleep, working on homework, maybe you had taken a walk down to the corner store.

“Maybe I should call her again.” He frowned, moving the flowers into one hand as he pulled out his phone.

The seconds between each ring felt like eons, his heartbeat stopping all together when the next one didn’t come. His breath hitched once he heard your voice faint on the other end, talking to someone before speaking to him.

“I think that may have been the longest game of phone tag we’ve had in awhile.” You smiled, happy someone had finally gotten through.

“Yeah, it definitely might have been.” He returned your laugh as he looked out at the setting sun over the building tops. He relished the sound of your voice, leaning into the phone.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh nothing, just seeing what your doing tonight.” Oikawa kicked at the concrete step in front of him.

“On a date in Tokyo actually, why?” You look at Tsukki and Yua arguing over what way to go, shaking your head as Yua threw her hands up in defeat.

“Oh, well nevermind then. I was by your house today so I wanted to say hi.” His words caught in his throat, voice cracking.

“Oh, i’ll be back in a few hours…” You frowned, did he sound upset?

“It’s ok, I have to head back to Tokyo for training in the morning.”

“I'm sorry senpai, maybe next weekend?” You stopped walking, Yua waving for Tsukki to stay.

“Yeah, maybe. Get home safe F/N.”

“You too Senpai.” You try to add as the line dies.

He looked down at the bouquet in his hands, lavender and baby's breath peeking out over the opaque cellophane .

He had remembered you mentioning this exact arrangement one night with him. Sobbing into his chest as you cried about never finding a boyfriend, never having a wedding, never getting to have your dream bouquet of flowers.

He found it endearing and quite funny that you decided to confess this to him of all people, the man that of course planned on marrying you one day.

He had wanted to wait until you finished school to tell you of course, you were distracted enough as is. But Sugawara was reason enough to do it sooner rather than later.

He had fought with himself long enough over telling you his true feelings, hated himself for letting another boy break your heart. He couldn’t handle seeing you like that anymore.

So he decided today would be the day, he would confess to you before you and Sugawara got serious. He had planned an entire day but with the lack of communication on both sides now he was left with this. Standing in front of your door as the sun went down, praying that you would open the door before it got any colder outside.

He bit his lip, chuckling as the bouquet fell to his side. “Of course i’ve been trying to reach her all day while she's on a date.”

He looked at the vibrant flowers, his restrained laugh slowly turning into soft sobs. His grip on the stems tightening as he turned back towards his car.

He threw the flowers into the passenger seat before getting in. Turning on the car, he ripped the gear shift back into drive. He sat there a moment, looking at the road in the rearview mirror before easing back into park, foot still rutted into the brake pedal.The lull of the motor reverberated through the steering wheel as he rested his head on the cold leather.

A moment was all he needed, just a moment to be alone as he screamed. Cried out how badly he wanted you to be home, how suffocating it was loving you when you didn't even know, how long he had hated the dull throbbing in his chest everytime he thought of you.

But now his moment was over as he sat back up, rubbing the tears from his swollen eyes as he reversed the car out of your driveway.

---

“Everything ok?’ Yua questions, walking beside you.

“Maybe, Tooru was in town today and wanted to see me.” You looked up at the confused blond behind her.

“Is that a bad thing?” Tsukki tilted his head.

“I’m not sure.” You force a smile as you looked away from your dark phone. “Lets go, we don’t want to miss the train!” You push your friends along, their suspicions waning.

You approached the station with a few minutes for goodbye, eyes falling on each other as you waited for someone to speak first.

“Well i’ll leave you too for your first kiss.” Yua smiles, pushing you towards Tsukishima. “Bye bye Tsukki, it was great meeting you!” She gave him a brief bow before turning to walk away.

“She is so annoying.” You whine as she disappears down the station steps.

“She cares, I think it's...sweet.” Tsukki shakes his head at the bright blue bob looking around the corner at the two of you. “Get home safe, text me that you made it ok if you want.” Tsukishima placed both his hands on the side of your face, leaning in to place a soft kiss on the crown of your head. “I’m sure she’ll ask why if I didn’t.”

You smiled softly up at the blond, “Thank you Tsukki.”

He gave Yua a wave, her head ducking back behind the brick wall of the station as he said his finally goodbyes.

You met Yua as the train pulled in, her squeals pricking your eardrums. “I would have preferred one on the lips for how much I spent on these tickets but that was fine too.”

You rolled your eyes and took a seat besides her on the train. “Ok, ok. Shush before we get kicked off the train.” It was nice to see her happy, despite the deceptive reasonings behind it.

The train ride is spent in silence as you both doze off, you hadn’t been the only one up all night worrying.

As the train pulled in, Yua nudged you awake. Passengers grabbing bags as they departed. You followed behind, walking with her up to the street as you regained some form of coherence.

You gave your friend a wave goodbye ,before turning to leave .Her hand grabbed at the fabric of your sleeve, pulling you back.

“Hey wait can I talk to you really fast?”

“Sure.” It was seldom that you saw Yua timid, eyes avoiding your own as she worked up the courage she usually had.

“Well, F/N. I, well. I’m sorry for everything.” She looked up at you, frowning at your growing smile.

“Yua it's fine, I should have just told you.” You attempted to ease the tension.

“No, it’s not. I didn’t think you could take care of yourself or make these kinds of decisions so I butted into your personal life that you weren't ready to share.” She kicked at the air before taking a deep breath.

“F/N, I was a bad friend. Your mom told me when she left to look out for you and I took it too far. I could have really messed up our friendship.” Her lip quivered as she shook her head. “ I’m sorry, I won’t be your mom anymore!” Her voice was louder then intended as she tried her best to cover the faults in her voice.

You chuckled, placing a hand on your head. “Your stupid and I love you.”

She returned your smile, pushing you lightly. “Go home loser.”

You waved goodbye, walking in opposite directions as you each made your way home. The burden no longer heavy on your friend's chest.

You on the other hand had your own, phone heavy in your pocket.

“Maybe I should call Tooru again, he sounded upset.” You reflected as you walked home.

Something didn’t sit right with you, anxiety building every time you thought about that call.

You pulled out your phone, turning on the screen as you walked up the driveway to your house.

You looked up at the porch, lowering your phone back down.

“Hey you.” You smiled, Sugawara leaning back against the step.

“Hey.” He patted the space beside him, “Let's have a talk.”

You gave him a quizzical look, slowly sinking down beside him.

He looks up at you, his lips in a tight line.“You two are breaking up, I'm not allowing you to see Tsukki anymore.”

You shook your head before laying it against his chest. “That's fine, he thinks he knows more about dinosaurs then me anyways.”

“I’m glad that was the deal breaker.” Sugawara ran his hand down your back as he laid his head on top of yours.

You stayed this way for a while, looking out at the skyline of stars. Your eyes growing heavier as you listened to the soft thumping of the heart that seemed to beat in tandon to your own.

“You should head inside, we have class bright and early tomorrow.” Sugawara pulled you away from his chest, his hand tilting your sleepy gaze to meet his own.

You nodded as he got up. He offered you a hand, helping you up as he brushed the dirt off your pants legs. You walked with him down the stairs to his car, watching him get in. He rolled the window, leaning out to meet you.

“Goodnight.” He smiled, pulling you down to his level. He ghosted his lips over your own before kissing you softly.

“Goodnight.” You leaned your forehead against his before standing back up.

He gave you a small wave before pulling out of your driveway, the size increasing as he drove down the road.

You giggled, watching his car disappear around the corner before making your way back up the steps. As you unlocked your door you noticed a small bud of lilac sticking out from under your doormat, the light illuminating the vibrant sprig as you opened the door.

You leaned down to pick it up, “These don't grow here?” You examined the flower, tilting it over in your hand as the door closed behind you.

----

Previous Chapter- Next Chapter

---

[prettywordsyouleft]

To Be Continued - Part 10

Summary: As an author, you had created Brian Kang for your current trilogy series to represent the ultimate man that everyone would love, along with Charli Evers - your female protagonist. What you hadn’t expected was for him to find a way out of the story and begin shaping up your world instead

Pairing: Brian Kang x female writer (ft. Park Sungjin)

Genre: writer au / romance / fantasy

Warnings: fictional characters coming to life / a bit of angst here and there / Sungjin as a cop (or does that only affect me?) >_>

Word count: 2487

Preview | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Epilogue

The broken laptop was taken by Sungjin that night, and he returned it to you a fortnight later with a new screen on it. Despite being grateful, you were still hopeless. “Brian’s gone for good, isn’t he?”

“Maybe it’s time for you to move on from him, Y/N. I hate seeing you this stuck. Don’t you want to write other stories and start living again?”

Staring up at the man, you nodded numbly. “I hoped I’d be living with him. I guess dreaming up the perfect guy isn’t a healthy thing to do.”

“It did happen, and your grief is validated,” he told you, giving your upper arm a gentle squeeze. “Everyone faces a loss of someone in their life at one point or another. And we have to learn how to continue on after they’re gone.”

“You’re right,” you murmured, smiling gently at Sungjin. “Thank you for being a good friend to me.”

“Officially friend-zoned,” Sungjin teased, dramatically grappling at his heart. You giggled, and this made him stop and smile. “And officially hearing a good sound come from you. I hope you can feel comfortable to laugh more often, Y/N.”

“Thank you for everything you’ve done.”

“Now that you have your device back, how about you go and write something? I’m sure it’s been a long two weeks.”

You grinned at his statement, nodding along. “My desktop is so ancient. I was close to spending a lot of money on a new one.”

“Well, now you don’t have to. Off you go and write, Miss Writer.”

Your smile fell as soon as you shut the door, the friendly term Sungjin just called you only bringing up the moments where Brian had called you that time and time again. Counting to ten, you avoided crying for the first time over your loss and smiled.

“All I have to do is keep counting and writing,” you instructed, marching down to your office and plugged in the laptop. It fired up immediately, and the new screen was pristine. Thankfully, all of your work was backed up to an external so you didn’t have to worry about losing your work. It surprised you, however, that the computer remembered where it last was in your session, the end of the Eternity document appearing in front of you.

Reading over the paragraph you had sent Brian, you wrapped your arms around yourself for comfort. “You did well, Y/N. You waited for love, and you loved him like no other. This story’s over now, though. Let’s move on.”

Slowly, you deleted your message, making sure the document said The End and closed out of it, moving it to another storage space on your external hard-drive before opening a new document.

It was time to step out of the limbo you had endured for too long.

“Lily, did you get my first submission?” you asked as you continued to tap furiously at your keyboard, not bothering to check the expression of your editor on the small window in the corner of your screen.

“I did, and it’s fabulous.”

“Just fabulous?” you asked, scrunching your up face in annoyance. “I don’t think fabulous is enough.”

“Ooh, someone is feeling good about her work lately,” Lily crooned, and you grinned. “It’s good to see you working this happily again, Y/N.

“Well, the Encounter series is done now, and I need to have a follow-up story.”

“Does your favourite constable know about this?” she wondered dreamily, and you stopped typing to shoot Lily a look. “What? I distinctively remember you swooning over your protector. There’s no hope for you two to have a romance behind the scenes too?”

“Lily, I might be a writer who enjoys a good love story, but that’s all it remains as for me, a story. Sungjin is my friend, and I’ll surprise him with the final manuscript when this is done.”

“Yes boss!” she cheered and then gasped. “Oh, by the way! I heard that pre-order sales for Eternity have surpassed Captivated! When it launches in two week’s time, I’m certain you’re going to rank well!”

“And then that world will finally be at a close,” you murmured to yourself, Lily straining to hear what your lips had expressed. When you noticed her confusion, you smiled brightly. “Thanks for all your hard work over the past three years on this project, Lil.”

“You wrote them, Y/N. That world, especially Eternity, is a masterpiece.”

“Well, I hope the next story will be even better. More than fabulous, even.”

“You never let a single thing slide. I’ll sing your praises further when you send me the chapter you’re working on right now!”

“Onto it!” you said with a wave of goodbye, and the video call ended.

Slumping in your chair, your eyes shifted towards the wall calendar where the date had been circled for Eternity’s release.

You had taken Sungjin’s advice and picked yourself up out of the dumps. Of course, it hadn’t been easy, and still to this day you had moments where you yearned for Brian. However, you had remained strong since your initial resolve and left Eternity where it belonged – in your completed archive. You hadn’t sent messages, you didn’t open the document, and aside from when obligated to, you didn’t speak of that world to anyone. It still hurt too much, and you were looking forward to a time where this was all just a fond memory in your writing career.

Right now, with the impending sales and then signing tour that was booked, however, you were doing your best to distract yourself from anything that might make you cave.

Writing your police officer au was definitely helping with that, and you launched into typing again about Sungjin and Ella, you two protagonists.

You knew you probably should change his name, but the story made the most sense to you when you imagined your friend. Although you did wonder how you could separate the two when it came to the more romantic parts in the novel, you were having a lot of fun, remembering those juvenile feelings you once had for Sungjin before Brian stepped out of the laptop and changed your life entirely.

Sigh. You had thought of Brian again.

“When will I stop doing that?” you wondered in a sing-song voice, trying to keep upbeat. It was then that a new document popped up on the screen, and you groaned loudly. “And when will you stop glitching?”

It wasn’t the first time the new document tab would appear, now and then when you were in the midst of typing. You assumed you kept hitting the keyboard shortcut for opening it somehow and mentally wrote yourself a note to check if it could be disabled when you were done with this chapter.

Paying it no mind, you continued writing your story, not thinking once about all the mysterious happenings that preluded Brian’s appearance in the first place.

“Wow, I can’t believe I’m meeting you today!” a young voice announced, and you smiled brightly at the teen before you. “I’m a big fan of Brian and Charli!”

“Aren’t we all?” you mentioned happily back, reaching for the copy of Eternity she had placed down to sign. “What’s your name?”

“It’s Jennie! With an i-e.”

“Well, Jennie, with an i-e, I’m so glad you came today. I hope to see you at my next book signing in a couple of year’s time.”

“You can count on it, Y/N!”

The day continued much in the same, and whilst you were overwhelmed by the support of your fans, when you entered your hotel for the evening, you were more than emotionally exhausted.

“Stupid Charli. She’s living the dream,” you muttered and then caught yourself, sighing heavily with your unexpected negativity.

It was foolish to be jealous, and yet after listening to everyone say how perfect Brian and Charli were for each other all day long, you understood your reaction. Even if you were moving on, you wanted to be the one who was perfect for Brian Kang.

“Let’s count to ten, shall we?” you told yourself, breathing deeply and following through with your mantra. After ordering room service for dinner, you settled into the plush bed with your laptop, ready to stream a crime show you had been watching for research.

When the screen appeared though, it was opened on Microsoft Word with a new document waiting for you. You groaned and looked into the settings to make sure you had in fact disabled the keyboard shortcut. It was as you had left it and you let out a small huff at the program before hovering your cursor over the exit button.

Something in you made you pause, however, and you peered at the empty document with some interest. “Why are you following me around?”

Thinking of how Brian would always open a new document to converse with you, a glimmer of hope surged through, and you hit the keys with a rapid pace.

Are you there, Brian Kang?

Nothing came, and your words didn’t dissolve either. Rolling your eyes at your rash reaction, you closed the document and opened Netflix.

You were well into the throes of the show when your room service knocked on the door, casting you out of bed and over to the door. Once you returned with the tray of food you had been given, you noticed the document was back on the screen again.

“What is going on?” you wondered, staring at it for some time. Placing a hand on the screen, you closed your eyes and willed Brian to come out. It had been so long since you had done this, and yet your fervour was stronger than ever. You prayed so hard that when you opened your eyes and saw nothing there, your tears were immediately at the surface, cascading down your cheeks.

“I’m so over pining for you. Either come back or leave me alone!” you wailed, pushing the laptop aside and curling up into a ball.

You didn’t see it then, but the cursor started to move as if someone was holding down the space button, creating ten pages before it stopped.

The tour ended, and you were all too grateful to wake up back home with Binks curled up beside you. Kissing your furbaby until he made it apparent that your affection was unwanted, you climbed out of bed to brew yourself some coffee.

Today, you felt free. The saga of Eternity was over and whilst you knew you would still have to do a couple more interviews here and there in the future where you would be asked about the series, and your Discord would still be hit up regularly about reviews over the final story in the trilogy, today you were at least free from the contractual sides of the story. You wouldn’t have to actively talk about Charli Evers and Brian Kang ever again.

You also hoped that one day, once your pain resolved enough, that you could reread the series and remember why you had loved it all along, instead of the jealousy and burden you felt towards it right now.

With coffee and toast held in either hand, you bounced off to your office and sat down at your desk, blinking when you found your laptop on your desk already.

Had you pulled it out of its bag last night when you got home?

Shrugging, you hit the power button and were surprised when it immediately loaded up your home screen. “I did turn you off, you finicky device.”

Lots of little things had happened since getting the screen fixed, and you had left it down to that incident messing with it. You didn’t have it in you to believe otherwise.

Opening your emails, you went through the important correspondence, threw out the spam, and moved the replied ones to their relevant folders. Once your inbox was empty, you moved onto your other admin tasks for the day, ensuring you were all caught up before you stepped back into your police officer au.

When ready, you clicked on the file, and instead of it appearing, it was a blank document. “Oh no, you don’t! There were words in this file!”

Looking at the title of the word document, you were relieved to see it untitled and not that of your current story. Clicking again on the file from your writing folder, another blank document appeared instead.

“Open it! I have to write about Sungjin and Ella!” you exclaimed, hitting the file repeatedly. Tens of blank documents appeared with your efforts until you were panting with the annoyance. Sitting back, you shook your head. “That’s it! I’m buying a new laptop! I’m done with you!”

Before you could close the screen down, however, you noticed that one document appeared and had words in it. But it wasn’t your current one. Instead, Encounter appeared on the screen, scrolling at a rapid rate to the bottom. Then it changed tabs, moving through Captivated just as fast. Finally, Eternity finished it off, the words The End simply staring back at you.

“…Brian?”

Leaning forward towards the screen, you waited to see what would happen next. Annoyed that your hopes were raised yet again, you started to close the empty tabs, leaving the three stories up. A final tab appeared, and you burst into tears as words started to appear on the screen.

It’s time to start writing our story now.

Standing up shakily, you pointed at the screen. “Hurry up then, I’ve waited far too long to write this story with you.”

The screen went blank as your heart began to thud erratically in your chest, your eyes widened whilst waiting for what would happen next. Reaching for the power button, you watched as the screen lit up.

And then you felt arms embrace you immediately. “I’m sorry I’m so late.”

“I don’t care right now,” you managed to say despite your emotions running down your face. Pulling back just enough so you could see Brian’s handsome face, you shook your head in disbelief. “As long as you’re here.”

“For good,” he assured, leaning in for a passionate kiss. “That world is closed and done with. Whilst ours is only beginning.”

You knew with time, you would want to know why it took so long for Brian to return and to scold him for hurting you so much. You also knew Brian would placate you in every way, and you would hear all about his equal longing and struggle without you at his side.

But for now, this was all you needed. Dream men were hard to find existing in real life. You had found yours again, and this time you wouldn’t write him in one way or another. You’d let your life together pen the journey you had at each other’s side.

Your story was about to be continued.

_________________

Epilogue

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[buryyourfavouritestrope]

I lied - Om! Lucifer

Author Note: Okay, so I'm mildly obsessed with Obey me, Why does the game have such an enticing plot, and characters with actual depth. It's so fun to play and addictive, I found the gif on Google, but fun fact, I now have the Lucifer and Diavolo UR+ for the Colour Nightmare event thing and I'm just happy about it.

The same flashing cursor had begun blurting profanities at her as she deleted her newest sentence. Her device fell flat against her stomach as she tilted her head back, how many times had she taken note of every dip and dent in the ceiling above her. Or the way the vines that encased her walls stopped just beneath the border as though the surface constricting its growth was a lake of pure acid.

With a harsh exhale of air, she closed her eyes, she allowed her mind to slip into the fantasies that filled her dreams. She allowed the moment of solace as she struggled with her words to encase her with a false sense of peace. A flurry of carmine would swim over her eyelids, accompanied by the ghosting touch that skimmed her skin littering it with small bumps. If she allowed herself to drown further in the fantasy, she was certain she’d hear the soft chuckle reserved for their intimate conversations.

She wouldn’t know, that down the corridor locked away in the confines of his own room, that his actions perfectly mirrored hers. Albeit he held his head in his hands discarding his device almost immediately. In the thousands of years that he had been around he’d never faced a loss for words. Not even as he begged the future ruler to save his innocent sister. Not even when he pledged his undying allegiance to the man even when it cost him a portion of his pride to bow to another being.

The demon had resigned his work for the evening; he’d blame sleep for clawing at his shoulders but if he were honest it was the thoughts. A devilish fiend had hovered in the back of his mind slowly nibbling at his ideologies. He wasn’t sure when she had infected his daily routine, and for a while he wondered if one of Satan’s curses actually managed to affect him.

A harsh sigh fell from his lips as he pulled his fingers over his face, the tips digging hard into the flesh in an attempt to tear himself from the thoughts. He needed something to relax him.

Her hand remained transfixed on her forehead; eyes still firmly closed as she rubbed at her skin. Time was running out for her; she knew that every day she looked at her phone. Soon she’d be back home, bathing in the sullen glory of loneliness, where the only excitement would be the endless bills she’d need to catch up on. She didn’t believe the brothers would text her, she didn’t think the best friend she’d found in a mysterious Butler would visit and nor did she think that he would ever think about her after the exchange came to an end. She needed something to relax her.

As if they could read the mind of the other, they both opened their eyes. They lifted themselves from their furniture and proceeded to head to the one place that could settle the discord in their brain. It came as a surprise that they hadn’t bumped into each other until they had both entered the Kitchen. She barely noticed him as she reached the cabinet full of teacups, her fingers barely touching the ceramic handle of the nearest one.

He’d seen her almost immediately; his breath stilling in his chest as he fought back the urge to call out to her. He was certain it would scare her and though he found it endearing when she became startled and placed a panicked hand over her heart, he knew it would fan the flames. A soft smile danced across his features as he watched her stand on her tip toes, her fingers frantically flapping at the cupboard as though the mugs would notice and waddle to the edge for her. He’d be damned if he wasn’t willing the inanimate object to do so.

“Allow me’ He cleared his throat; the demon made short work crossing the floor. She jumped, her feet landing flat against the cold flooring as she turned wide eyed to see him. He didn’t look at her as he pulled the object from its home. He placed it beside her on the counter, before reaching for his own cup. “it appears we had the same idea” He added in jest.

“Did you also have a problem that only tea could solve?” She laughed; her words had roused a chuckle from his lips as he set about brewing the tea. He chose her favourite; even though he hadn’t been rather fond of the blend, he chose her favourite. He didn’t notice the way her eyes darted from him to the ground as though she was fighting her own mind.

“You could say that, it’s getting late, and we have an early start tomorrow, shouldn’t you be asleep? Or was Solomon’s overly spiced Bat stew gnawing at your insides.” Lucifer questioned; he was aiming for a light joke.

“Oh, don’t remind me of that, I think the bat actually winked at me. Although now I think about it, you were sat next to me. I think it was hitting on you instead” She answered, a laugh fell from both of them as they stood in the comfort of each other’s presence. It crossed their minds simultaneously, the doubt that had them questioning why they overthought their words. Why they hadn’t just sent the messages they had made for each other.

The kitchen fell into a silence as they looked away from the other, he kept his focus on the cup beneath him, whilst she remained fixated on a spot ahead of her. They listened to the door open gently as they assumed Beel snuck his way through the room; their suspicions were confirmed as the fridge opened.

“Beel, if you reach for anything that doesn’t have your name on it, they’ll be severe consequences” Lucifer sighed. He heard an unceremonious mumble as Beel rummaged around a little longer and left as quietly as he had come. “I have something I want to-“

“I lied” She interrupted him, her eyes closing as she shrunk in on herself. He frowned, the phrase itself had come as no surprise to him. He knew what she meant, even before she had made up her mind to inform him. He’d spent the whole week fixated on their previous conversation. Right now, she stood inches from tears as she stared at her demon. “I told you I was fine with our limited time but I’m not. I never was.”

A soft smile ensnared his lips as he let her worries sit stagnant in the air. Not much got by Lucifer unnoticed, he had known her feelings all too well. He had known the very second, she had smiled at him back then. It had been a foolish attempt to hide the agony burning in her, she had chosen to spare him the harm of watching her heartbreak.

“I keep thinking when I go back, you’ll move on. I’ll be a name on a long list of people who used to be special to you. I keep imagine that we’ll never see each other again, and I’ll never get to help you groom Cerberus or help you when you’re overworking and just need someone to tell you to stop” She cried, the tears had begun to fall now.

“I know” He uttered, his hand falling against her shoulder as he pulled her against him. It was his attempt at comfort, he watched as she buried her head in his chest and held him as tightly as ever. “I want to be selfish and beg you not to go home, I want to be selfish and ask you to be damned to an eternity down here because at least you’ll be with me. But I can’t, all I can do is promise you that nothing will change. My darling, you will never be unloved by me, you are too well tangled in my soul. Let’s go get some rest”

He’d take her to his room, he hold her for as long as she needed him, he hold her for as long as he needed her.