#and then it's. part two which means absolutely fuck all to anybody else

[inseparabiles]

taps foot impatiently

when will it be late enough to post this chapter

[gamerwoo]

[Tales from the Pack] Jeonghan: Sold (Part Three)

Characters: Jeonghan x female reader

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, fantasy, angst, loooots of mentions of the black market/human trafficking, people in cages, shock collars, violence, murder, guns, possible minor character death, just a lot of bad things happening here and it's very chaotic lmao

Word count: 3,253

Summary: If Jooyeon and Baekhyun never went snooping around the black market, they would’ve never discovered the human trafficking ring and wanted to help. They would’ve never discovered you inside one of the many cages full of people, and Jeonghan would’ve never went against the alphas and demanded they help. But for you, Jeonghan would do anything, even if it means bringing back trouble from a past he never knew about.

a/n: things in bold are meant to be in english

Previous | Next | Sold Masterlist

“Look me in the eyes and tell me you wouldn’t do it if it were Jooyeon in there. Or Yeji. Or Soomin. Or any of the girls in this household. You’d see your mate laying in a cage, dirty, exhausted, knowing they were being sold off to a pack of mate-collectors, and you’d just let them go?”

That was enough persuasion for the pack to finally cave and agree to help Jeonghan. Those who had mates understood how it felt. The others could imagine how horrible it must’ve felt to see that, and the determination Jeonghan felt to do anything possible to get you out of that situation. 

Junmyeon’s pack was hard to persuade – well, except for Chanyeol – but they eventually agreed to help.

“I don’t think we’ll be able to overtake whoever’s behind the ring, though,” Junmyeon admitted. “We don’t even know how many people are involved.”

“Hanbin will no doubt help us,” Kyung said.

“I can ask Chris, too,” Cooper shrugged. “At least having Felix or Changbin would be helpful.”

“Either way,” Seungcheol interrupted, “we’re going to plan this from all angles. Whether we have four packs or just two – we’re going to make sure we can pull this off.”

“Our main goal is getting Blue out of there,” Jihoon added on, “but we’re gonna try to save as many people as we can.”

Jongdae stopped the explanation, “Who’s Blue?”

“That’s what Jeonghan started calling her,” Joshua explained. 

“It’s the color of her collar,” the boy in question shrugged. “What else am I supposed to call her?”

“That rhymed!” Soonyoung smiled, pointing to Jeonghan enthusiastically before taking Jihoon’s palm to the back of the head.

“Where are these captives expected to go after they’re free?” Sehun wondered. “Just…wander off into the woods? They’ll just get caught again.”

“Cooper and I worked together with an ally of mine to find some safe housing for them,” Kyung explained. “Her and her partners work under the table as werewolf doctors. Besides, the public already views werewolves as horrible creatures so I’m sure anybody would be willing to take someone in who was almost a part of a werewolf kidnapping.”

“And how long do we have to figure all of this out?” Yixing questioned.

“That’s the problem,” Seungcheol sounded a little afraid and unsure now, “...we don’t know. Which means we have to plan this and execute it immediately.”

-

You felt absolute fear watching the girl be thrown to the ground, blood covering half her face. But you didn’t scream or even move. You learned not to. You did anything you were told to avoid drawing attention to yourself. Anything to not get hurt more than you already were.

“Can you be fucking careful?” one of the other men snapped gruffly at the one who’d thrown the girl to the ground by her hair. “If they’re damaged, they’re not gonna pay as much!”

“They already paid half and it was more than enough,” another said.

“But I want the other half in full!”

You knew about whoever had bought you. The men kept saying you were going to be ‘slaves to monsters’, but you were pretty sure they were the real monsters. You’d heard all the stories about werewolves, but you didn’t feel any fear knowing you were soon going to be shipped off to a den of them. However, you didn’t trust any human anymore. Your whole life, all they’d done is hurt you and betray you. None of them were compassionate. All of them just looked for personal gain, and you were somehow always in the crossfire.

Maybe a life with werewolves would be better.

In the cage next to you, you heard a scoff. You already knew it was Saoirse. She seemed to always be doing something to get in trouble, but she was the only person there that you talked to. She was the only human you’d met that wasn’t completely horrible.

“They’re gonna be in for a rude awakening when these cages are empty one morning,” she muttered.

You scooted a little closer to the edge of the cage closest to her, “What?”

Saoirse was the only person you ever spoke to. You wouldn’t necessarily consider her a friend considering the trouble she got herself in, but she was someone that you could keep at arm's length. She’d been nice to you a handful of times, so you’ve gotten her out of trouble with her language barrier in return. You spoke to each other here and there to pass the time and relieve boredom, but that was really it.

She glanced over at you like she just now noticed you were there before she looked back at the scene in the middle of the tent, “Some creatures showed up here last night. They looked human but their eyes were something else, and they promised to get us all out of here.”

You were both speaking quietly so as to not draw the attention away from the men bickering among themselves, but you still kept stealing glances over toward them to make sure they didn’t notice the two of you talking.

“And you trust strangers to save us?” you questioned.

She shrugged, “What reason would they have to come here and find us? And why would they lie about saving us?”

“What reason would they have to save us?” you countered, looking back at her.

She tisked, “Let me have something to be hopeful for, will ya?”

“Hey!” one of the men yelled, making you jump but Saoirse didn’t even seem phased. You whipped your head around while her eyes just glanced behind you to the three men. “Do you two wanna be next?”

You quickly shook your head.

Saoirse never understood what they said, so she just muttered for them to fuck off like she always did, which then angered the men because they couldn’t understand her. Typically, they’d do something to punish her, but today, the man scoffed and waved the issue away.

“The freaks will have a field day with you,” he spat before the three of them left the tent.

“Guess lunch time isn’t happening…” she muttered with a roll of her eyes.

“You need to stop making things worse for yourself,” you huffed, your voice tired.

Truthfully, you were still feeling quite groggy. You always were, but you’d woken up only a few minutes prior to the girl getting beat for whatever reason the men found to do so. You didn’t want to go back to sleep but it was hard keeping your eyes open.

“I’m not letting shit like this happen to me without a fight,” she scoffed. “If I’m capable, I’ll do anything to stop what’s happening to us. I mean, those people last night wouldn’t have come and offered to free us if I didn’t stay awake.”

“We’re all going to the same place either way,” you finally snapped, sending her a glare. “You’re fighting for nothing and making it worse for yourself – and you almost dragged me down with you. Leave me out of your���righteous bullshit or whatever.”

You rarely snapped at Saoirse, but she still didn’t seem phased by it, “You need to stop letting bad shit happen to you, Girl. That’s why it keeps happening. You don’t do anything to try and fight back.”

“And which one of us have gotten beaten the most?”

Before Saoirse could come up with a snappy reply that you knew she’d have, the tent flaps opened again, and two different men showed up with stale bread. They tossed half a loaf in each cage that everyone would fight over and tear apart like animals. Some hurt each other in the process, so hungry that they were feral for every single crumb they could get, even if it meant scratching and grabbing at each other.

As always, you stayed away in a corner and watched the other six people in your cage dive after the bread tossed in, snarling and yelling and fighting over it. You didn’t get food, but at least you weren’t injured even worse.

“Hey. Girl.”

That’s what Saoirse called you. You didn’t have a name – not that you could remember. So she always called you Girl to get your attention.

You turned your head just in time to see Saoirse tossing something through the bars and into your cage. You quickly cupped your hands to catch whatever it was. A piece of bread half the size of your fist.

You glanced back up at her and she offered you a small smirk before biting into her half of the bread. Nobody in the cage dared fight Saoirse over the portion she’d managed to get because she was infamous for fighting back. They knew fighting against her would be a losing battle because she dared to even fight back against the men holding them all captive.

Maybe it was smarter to fight back like Saoirse, even if it meant worse punishments. But life had punished you so much already, and you were tired of fighting.

As you nibbled on your bread, turning so your back was to your cagemates, you decided one really couldn’t teach old dogs new tricks.

-

The locked gate in front of the flaps to the tent was no issue for Soonyoung before, but the pack needed him focused. So the question stood as the pack planned for the prison break: how to get into the tent in the first place without running into the werewolf traps set around the perimeters?

“Okay…” Cooper began slowly and softly, afraid to speak the plan she was brewing out loud because she didn’t want it to be considered bad or stupid, “what if we had someone on the inside who could unlock the gate? Like…maybe a mouse?”

“A mouse?” Chanyeol had scoffed.

Jihoon considered the idea and shrugged slightly, “I mean, that’s not a bad idea, actually. Small enough the guards probably wouldn’t see him.”

“Where the hell are you guys gonna find a trained mouse?” Baekhyun asked with an incredulous laugh.

Chris simply pointed with his thumb to the boy sitting beside him, “Perfectly trained, right here.”

“Make that two,” Jaesang said as he raised his hand to head-level.

And that’s exactly what step one of the plan was. A tiny gray mouse scurried around the perimeter of the outside of the tent, alongside a dark brown one, going up toward the black iron gate. The outside of the gate wasn’t protected this time, but Felix and Jaesang could see two men inside the gate that were a few feet away from the entrance. 

They shimmied up one of the bars to the latch and together, managed to push it up, jumping down as the gate swung open so they could hurry inside before possibly getting stepped on, knowing they couldn’t see the people who would be following right behind them.

The two guards looked up, their conversation falling silent as the gate swung open seemingly out of nowhere.

“How the hell did that happen?” one of the men asked as they both stepped up to inspect the gate’s latch before closing it. “Did the latch break?”

“No, it looks–”

The man didn’t finish his sentence as his head was suddenly thrown back like he’d been punched in the face. The other guy looked up in surprise, only for his neck to get twisted at an unnatural angle, and with a snap, he fell to the ground. His companion soon met the same fate as a human Jaesang snuck up behind him while he was distracted with the pain in his now bloodied nose.

Seungcheol and Cooper appeared behind the first man’s body, Cooper’s hand on Seungcheol’s back being removed now that they were safe to be visible.

“There’s more guys around the back,” Felix informed them as the rest of the group began rushing in through the front gate. “We’re gonna have our work cut out for us.”

“We’ve got four packs against some humans,” Jinyoung chuckled, clearly feeling good about the odds. “It’ll be a piece of cake.”

“Just don’t get too cocky,” Hanbin warned.

“Cocky’s his middle name,” Kyung muttered before going off with her group to subdue the men keeping the people in the cages.

-

“Alright, get up! Everybody up! Let’s go!”

It wasn’t the first time you’d woken up to a man yelling for you all to wake up, but this wasn’t a voice you’d heard before. This one was softer, but still sounded urgent. Your eyes groggily peeled open as you tried to sit up, your bones and joints stiff and aching. Your vision was blurry so you thought you were surely just seeing things when you saw someone grab ahold of the metal bars and pull them open almost effortlessly. You sat up completely and rubbed at your eyes, only to see someone with blonde hair, yellow eyes, and a kind smile standing right in front of you, his slender fingers wrapped around the bars. He looked like an absolute angel with his perfect teeth, pink lips, and kind eyes that looked right at you. He made your heart flutter.

“Let’s get you out of here,” he said before pushing the bars apart enough to create a gap for the people in your cage to get out.

He was quick to scoop you up before the other six people in your cage trampled you to get free. But as soon as you were too close to the bars, your collar went off with a continuous shock that had you letting out a strangled yell.

Jeonghan was quick to grab the collar by the black box and rip the blue collar from your neck. 

Unfortunately for the wolves, it was chaos trying to free these people. Of course, they were panicking trying to run away and weren’t going to listen to those trying to guide them safely outside the tent and to freedom. Some were guided out and made it to those waiting at the perimeter to guide them toward the safehouses they had set, but others were ignoring all instruction and running for their lives, getting hurt or killed in the process. Some of them ran out, clutching their necks as they were shocked to no end as they tried to make their escape. 

Jeonghan wasn’t focusing on that. His only job was to get you out and get you back to the house as quickly and safely as possible. Once he had you, he was supposed to run for it, and that’s exactly what he was doing, dodging other captives and wolves as he ran for the exit with every wolf he ran passed covering him so he could make a safe escape with you.

As you were being carried out, you saw another man prying open the bars of Saoirse’s cage. She immediately leapt out and followed where the man was pointing to, running to follow after you and the strange man who was carrying you. Her eyes caught yours over his shoulder, and she seemed to brighten a little and give you a knowing smile as if to say ‘I told you so’.

The man jogged through the gates before he bolted for an escape.

“Jihoon!” he called. “Cover me!”

Jihoon stopped what he was doing as soon as he spotted Jeonghan, then his eyes looked behind him to see a guard chasing after them. His eyes glowed to life as he held his palm toward the man before flinging him backward toward the tent, his back hitting the iron bars of the gate.

You looked around, seeing absolute chaos around you as giant wolves tore apart men, and captives ran for their lives or were shot down. Then you looked behind you to see Saoirse still running behind you.

If you weren’t looking at her, you wouldn’t have known the scream that came from her mouth was hers before she hit the ground. You could see blood staining the back of her shirt, the pool of it spreading. 

“Saoirse!” you cried, reaching your hand behind the man.

He skidded to a stop, turning to see who you were yelling for. He looked over at Jihoon again, and the alpha nodded, running toward the girl. 

Jeonghan didn’t wait to see what would happen to Saoirse. He couldn’t wait. He had to get you home. He had to get you to safety. So he turned back around and continued running the way he had been.

While he was focused on your safety, though, you were fixated on Saoirse’s. Sure, she was trouble, but she was the closest thing you’d ever had to a friend. So while Jeonghan ran, you watched over his shoulder to see what her fate would be.

-

The scream cut through the tense air. Everyone had clamped their hands over their ears, eyes closing tight as if it could help drown out the scream. Mingyu’s eyes were watering just from the sharp noise.

Finally, it died off, leaving everyone to look to Eunjin standing in the doorway of the den, hands still holding a plate of food like nothing happened. But her blue eyes were locked on the girl at the end of the hallway, clinging to the back of Jeonghan’s shirt with fear in her eyes. Eunjin’s eyes were glossy and filled with tears, and the two wolves who had been left behind to take care of the mates began to panic.

Eunjin was staring at you.

“What happened?” Joshua asked urgently as he rushed over to her. He stood in front of her, gently gripping her upper arms and searching her eyes, but it was like he wasn’t even there to her. It was like she was still staring through him at you. “Eunjin? Did you hear something? Do you sense something? What is it?”

The three wolves waited for her response, but they knew her scream woke up every single mate upstairs and they would no doubt be down to ask questions soon. Immediately, they feared the worst. One of their own had died. Hell, maybe you were going to kill them. That wouldn’t have caught Eunjin’s attention like that. She would’ve sensed or heard something more significant than that.

And you were even more confused than anyone else because that was the first thing you experienced after Jeonghan opened the door.

It felt like time was frozen until Eunjin’s lips quivered and she said in a whisper, “I have a bad feeling again…”

The small group looked around at each other with a mix of worried and grim looks. They all knew what that meant. It was a feeling she got when she had met Hansol before. She screamed when she saw him, and then Jiung died and things went downhill with Kyung. 

Then three pairs of golden eyes were on you, along with Eunjin’s blue eyes that sent a shiver down your spine for reasons other than her screaming at you.

But Jeonghan didn’t care. He didn’t care if you brought death or something, if he were honest. Maybe Eunjin just sensed death associated with you because of what had happened. He’d make up any excuse in his head for you. He’d defend you in front of his entire pack if he had to. All he wanted was you to be safe, and now that he had you in his arms, he could make sure you always would be. And he’d never let you go.

»»————-　　————-««

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[karmavongrim]

Love Spell fanfic idea

DP x DC fanfiction idea named "Love Spell" that I have been mulling over the past couple of weeks.

Klarion x Danny shipping (Chaotic Spirits) story, because why not and it would be fun to write about the chaos these two could cause.

Took some inspiration from this, this, bit of this and this.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danny really didn’t know whatever he should laugh, cry or flip the nearest table he could get his hands on. He never really thought highly of the Justice League to begin with, hell, you would be hard-pressed to find anybody in Amity Park who did nowadays.

But this… this could just as well take the metaphorical cake of bullshit that has been piling up over the past three years.

He took a deep, measured breath before focusing back on his boyfriend. His sweet, lovable, very-much-chaotic-immortal-man-child of a boyfriend.

“...They think I’m what now?”

On the other side of this conversation sat Klarion, the witch boy extraordinaire, who was combing his slender fingers delicately through his precious familiar’s fur as he watches his beloved having a hard time grasping at the situation. And since he thought of himself to be a rather fantastic boyfriend, he repeated what he said.

“The League of Simpletons have somehow gotten in their heads that I must have enthralled you in one way or another in order to get my hands on some ultimate power, as part of my apparently evil master plan.”

Danny took another breath, this was just getting ridiculous. But then again what else was new, these people really knew how to make a mountains out of a molehills. Even Wes didn’t have this severe of an apophenia, he at least ended up being right more often than not.

“So they think you’ve put me under a love spell or something?”

Klarion merely shrugged in mock-helplessness. “Apparently you wouldn’t be dating me otherwise.” In all honesty he probably shouldn’t be enjoying this as much as he currently is, but he couldn’t help himself.

His ever present smirk widened when his beloved Starlight’s face twitched in irritation. “For Ancient’s sake… seriously?” A simple nod was enough for Danny to want to throw the next Justice Idiot who was stupid enough to come close to Amity Park’s boarders through the nearest window!

Calm down Danny, calm down. Just remember Jazz’s breathing exercise. One… two… three…

…

Wait a minute… would that mean- no way in hell way they’ve been…

“Wait a minute- Is that the fucking reason why they’ve constantly been ruining our dates these past few months!?”

Another nod.

Yeah, fuck being calm and shit, ya boy is absolutely livid! All this time they were doing it on fucking purpose!! He so is going to burn all of their ugly ass capes and dye all their ugly ass costumes pink! Better yet, he’ll paint their entire HQ with the most obnoxious and clashing colours possible.

Klarion let the halfa rage about for a good moment before interjecting. It wouldn’t do to have the lounge destroyed, especially when that energy could be used on something else he has in mind.

“We could have fun with this you know, at their expense.”

Danny stopped in his track and turned his inquiry gaze towards Klarion. He knows that smile and it could only mean trouble, trouble which he was more than willing to partake in. A smirk of his own began to grace his lips. “What do you have in mind exactly?”

Once again Klarion was reminded why he’s dating this gorgeous creature in the first place. Trust him to be able to match his chaotic nature despite his hero persona.

“Oh you are going to love it, my dear.”

[eddiestightywhities]

okay this is very long and mostly just for me to get some stuff of my chest and out of my head therefore anybody tagged pls don't feel as though you have to read it all (like obvs you know you don't have to but you also hopefully know what i mean lol):

so i've had some quite heavy stuff going on in meatspace recently, and then i went to see i saw the tv glow two nights ago which was beyond brilliant but fucked me up entirely on a personal level. then, just to be a bit (read: incredibly) stupid, i for some reason (read: bc i'm a masochist) decided to delve into reading waaaay too many of my first 'eddie losing his shit over christopher leaving/summer of sexuality queer crisis' fics, which i've not dared let myself do before now bc it's all very close to the bone for me i.e. my own queer (trans) crises—yes, plural, they keep coming—and stuff that's not a million miles away from the shit going on with my eldest son (bar kim lol). why tf my brain chose the worse time possible is just another one of life's mysteries (read: i'm just insane [see above]).

(btw my struggling hugely with issues of repression plus my son hating/not hating me aside, THIS FIC is the insanely brilliant piece of art that kicked off the binge. it's from the astonishingly talented @wildehacked and is one of two parts which are possibly the best buddie fics—or even just some of the best fics, period—that i've ever read. seriously, check the tags and if you're a buddie lover and it/they seem like your sort of thing you should 100% go save/read it/them!)

anyways, after all that i'm now just kind of spiralling a bit tbh aha. i'm not fine, not rn, but i will be fine at some point soon sort of thing. like, i'm okay and nobody needs to worry etc i'm just trying to do one if the countless things that i'm absolutely bloody terrible at which is reaching out. but not because i need anything from anybody it's more just for me to be able to say “i'm going through some stuff right now and i might or might not disappear for a while” because i don't usually manage anything at all like that when i'm in the trenches and instead just retreat into my shell and go radio silent—and the thing is, i know some very lovely people who have shown concern when i've done that in the past and i'm therefore trying to be better. friends old and new alike such as @shealynn88 @sharkfish @greyhavenisback @raisesomehale @doilooklikepeople @woodchoc-magnum @buddiebeginz i'll absolutely be getting back/chatting to you when i'm able to interact with a bit more—well, when i'm a bit more, i 'spose xp

also tagging lovelies @novemberhush for the usually well-loved procrastination tag game stuff and @inell and @kitteneddiediaz (and possibly @veronae-buddie and @daffi-990?) for the WIP games i've been kindly tagged in but not responded to. thank you and sorry! like, i know it's absolutely fine and nobody really cares about stuff like that, but i'm just very much feeling like i need to say these things right now. and more apologies if there have been tags i've missed from other lovely folks; not being round these parts for 48+hrs = horrendous notifs situation (you know how it is).

on the writing front, i don't know if it's both completely dumb and ridiculous to start this by saying, “hmm, i'm unsure if it's related or not?” but as well as everything else i'm simultaneously having one one those Everything I Have Ever Written Am Writing Or Could Write Is Utter Fucking Dogshit sort of moments (like, i know i'm not a great writer—which is not derogatory and just fact and 100% absolutely fine—but i'm usually at peace with the strange little oneshots i puke out, y'know?) which is yet another reason for me to disappear off here for the time being as i sadly have one of those unhealthy irrational relationships with fandom that's like I Don't Deserve To Be Here If I'm Not Being Useful—which i know is dumb af and i would absolutely try to coax anyone else out of if it were them saying it and not me, but alas poor yorick. thing is, i used to be incredibly prolific in making fanart, for loads of different fandoms, and that too has dwindled considerably over the last year or more (god, is it that long?) therefore it's just a double whammy currently with the writing now also taking a hit. and i know, i know, whomp whomp poor me etc etc i just—i fear whenever i disappear, i won't ever be able to make it back... bleugh horrid lol

obviously i can't seem to be normal about anything ever so i'm sorry if this is a weird way to respond to nothing happening that nobody asked about (there is no 'if'; it absolutely is weird but i'm afraid it is what it is) and i truly don't need anything from anybody, i just think me posting this and saying how i'm feeling will probably be doing me a bit of good. honestly, pls feel free to ignore, this is just cathartic for me. but i guess, at the same time, as well as those things, me being on the spectrum means i'm not skilled at keeping friendships going, which makes me very sad, so this is maybe me voicing those fears in an attempt to combat them becoming a reality? i think? it's just that i've already drifted away from too many lovely people here due to the affects of these things and i'm therefore just—i think i'm just really trying in my own odd little way.

anyways i'm gonna go rewatch some sense8 and sob out my own weight in tears and snot and just keep on keeping on with existential crisis #4793 for the time being until something shifts in me and then i'll be back at some point? yeah, i think that sounds about right.

love you guys big much (one of my son's isms from when he was little) <3

ps just realised i wrote this on my buddie blog and really can't be arsed copying and pasting it over to my main @all-or-nothing-baby... so anybody who was wondering, yeah it's me yer boi cassidy xp also if you read this far you're insane and i love you even more for it <3

[krikoxo]

I... I think there will always be something else... Otherwise I need to write a full blown book with questions and send it your way.... And then your answers will cause more questions to arise...

Lucky student... If I was that student I would still want help... With.. What were you teaching?

Also... "Fuck him in the closet" suspiciously sounds like pegging.... Which both excites me and scares me...

With somno and free use I feel like I may have not gotten my idea across... I meant that each one is a logical continuity of the other and something like "free use, but only if I'm awake" sounds like something is missing... Like I actually can't be used anytime...

I don't like being disobedient... But every rule... It's just so exciting... I'll think about it... And I'll think about it more... And then... Then I'll figure out a loophole... And then I'll be so smug! Just staring you down, knowing fully well that in a matter of minutes I'll be whimpering and moaning... But I'll love it!

You've talked about intoxicating... What do you find in it? Or is it just a fantasy, which you wouldn't do in person?

Because one of my hobbies revolves around alcohol, so I've seen a variety of intoxicated people in different stages of intoxication... And I have to say, most of them I don't even want to look at... Not shaming anybody, just giving my guttural reaction. The way I can understand it(but I do accept it any other way as well) is if someone has one or two drinks and gets touchy feely, but not really impaired by the spirit. So I am really curious about that...

Also... Books... Do you read? If so, what? What excites you? What makes you smile or gasp... Or say just one more page... And then it's morning again... And you have to live your life before getting back to the book... What types of books get you so infatuated that you feel drunk, after you finish it?

And please stop being so perfect with your answers... I have a really addictive golden retriever personality.... And if you continue like this.... You'll get me obsessed...

Hello again my favorite shy boy.

I’m gonna answer all your questions/inquiries in order darling. When I said “I fucked him in the closest” I did mean riding. I’m not opposed to trying pegging but since I can’t also experience the pleasure it’s less appealing to me. When I think of penetration, I think of mutualpleasure/stimulation so I’m not as into it.

Also I agree, free use cannot exist without sonmo because somno is a natural part of free use. You’re very smart baby.

As for intoxication, it is definitely something I love doing irl. I absolutely love getting high and making some dumb boy eat my pussy. I think it’s such a vulnerable form of intimacy getting insanely high or drunk with someone. My biggest fantasy is getting raped by my best guy friend after drinking with him because he can’t hold back anymore.

For books I really enjoy thrillers and mysteries. You ask what makes me gasp or excited and I would say a good twist in a book. Or if the forced duo starts having feelings for each other I get so happy haha. My favorite books are definitely romance because it allows me to experience so much form the comfort of my bed and it’s fucking awesome

I hope these are satisfactory, and please remember I don’t mind if you’re clingy like a golden retriever. I find you very fun, be as obsessed as you want<3

[epersonae]

I wrote this originally as a reblog of something else, but after letting it sit in drafts for a while realized it needed to be its own thing. (but do go read that post, it was what got me thinking in this specific direction) I have not edited it much, other than to remove some intro about the kind of shitty day(s) I was having in my non-online life that were part of why I wrote something and then sat on it.

I have been thinking about

Don't like, don't read

(I saw this with rainbow text, and I asked how the fuck to do that, and frankly I don't have that level of patience, so just imagine it rainbow I guess)

And..........

Sure? We're all just here to have a good time or whatever, and Just Like Stuff, and it's exhausting being a hater (but also [stares at people I know who I've seen say all that and who are also ABSOLUTELY haters in private])

But I want something more nuanced than that. I mean that as both:

a writer of things I know other people have taken issue with (including, I remembered today, something that I heard secondhand about, in addition to the vagueblogging I've mentioned in an earlier post about my older fic)

and a reader/art appreciator who has some issues with things I've tried to read and art I've seen.

I don't what it is or how it works or how to get from here to there. I don't even really know how to do this with people I'm close to! (with the exception of having been a thoroughly obnoxious beta constantly saying "make me believe this could even happen", or pointing out conflicts with canon or whatever) I tend to silently nope out and then change my opinion of the person without ever telling them, because yeah, I'm horrifically conflict averse.

Which is why this might sit in my drafts for a long time.

And then, outside of friendships, and Difficult Conversations or whatever

I don't like pile-ons. I don't like a couple of people trying to articulate what bugs them about a piece of writing, and maybe being awkward or clumsy about it, and immediately getting drowned out by "you're being mean to my friends". (and I say that as someone who has had friends' writing receive this sort of critique! Multiple friends!) Maybe the immediate answer is, yes, the back button, but it has to be possible to dissect what's bothering you about a piece of writing (or a trope, or a ship) without it being negativity or an attack.

Here, I'll go first, because these are two things in OFMD fic that bug me endlessly, that writers I like have written, and I think they exhibit a subversion of the source material that is counter to the actual themes of the show.

Note: since I wrote all of this, I have written a little bit about my sort of complicated feelings about a fic that imho is an original novel in a trenchcoat, a sort of fic lacroix despite being very good. these examples are in the same vein as that.

Inevitable fucking disclaimer: I don't think people are wrong or bad for doing these things, I'm not going to try to make anybody stop, I practice don't like don't read (and I have some exceptions that I've enjoyed despite it being something I don't like generally)

Enemies to lovers: the whole point of Ed and Stede is that they click perfectly and immediately. They like each other! From the very first minute it's friendship and mutual admiration and delight and attraction. Enemies to lovers is a cliche that belongs to a different story entirely. I wish people would think more before jumping to that trope. (I've had an AU in my head for months that I absolutely cannot write until I solve this problem from the AU's source material) It's an interesting question to me, actually, why it seems to be so easy to write characters who don't like each other and then somehow fall in love, when the source material shows them liking each other SO MUCH right away.

Younger than middle aged: again, the whole point is that they are changing their lives, that their midlife crises brings them to the point where they can find love. I think it's a djenks Themes and Motifs thing, to have a story about getting to this point in your life and really looking at it and going "am I where I need to be?" Also it's incredibly unique and special to me after the last few years of my own rolling midlife crisis. (petty thought that I have sometimes: it is a failure of imagination about or knowledge of actual middle-aged people) Tbh, this goes double for age difference, I will nope out of that even faster than both of them being young.

And I think there's something about being able to not like something and still not be a dick about it, to know enough about what you do like to look at something and say "this doesn't work for me and here's why", to engage thoughtfully and critically (and yeah occasionally in public) while still having respect for the other person.

I am thinking also of @emi--rose and @frommybookbook and music, and their efforts to find kpop and Taylor Swift, respectively, that I might enjoy, because I don't like most of either, and I think this thing we've been doing is helping all three of us understand more about what we all do and don't like.

[pausing to think]

It occurs to me, also, that I spent a lot of time griping while editing for the benefit of all the broken hearts, about having to go back and do a lot of set up/rewriting to make some of what happens in that read plausibly. And I was soooooo bitchy about it and also that critique was all correct and it made the story stronger even aside from making it more "canonical", whatever the fuck that means in that particular setting.

And that was in the particular creative intimacy setting of working with a beta, which is different, admittedly, from random critique on the open internet.

But then I spent a while, back in the day, immersed in the TAZ questions of "is Lucretia a lesbian?" and "can Magnus ever love again?" and I wrote my rarepair (and associated polycule shipping) very much from my id, and a certain amount of "you can't tell me that didn't happen" that was based on overidentification and personal experience, but there were definitely people who were pretty publicly "ew" about it, and I had to think through my position, and both decide what felt true about and also decide to write from my weird heart, but not blindly.

Idk, I've written all of this and I'm just landing on

I think introspection is nice.

I think it's good to do, I think it's worth thinking about what you like and don't like, and maybe where that comes from, and not in a puriteen way but with sincerity and curiosity. I would like to support and encourage that spirit of artistic introspection.

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 7 ("YOU GOT TO KNOW WHEN TO HOLD 'EM / KNOW WHEN TO FOLD 'EM") EDITION

Whew, baby. Well, I found this episode particularly brutal.

I've been noodling this week on the following theme: the mundanity of toxicity. The everyday-ness of bad in people. I think this episode captured this well (cc @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm, and @bengiyo, who all got a little preview of this thinking).

But I caught some other themes in this episode, too, which I'll quickly hit and list:

2) The elements of life, and 3) Gambling.

As a devoted meta writer, writing about Only Friends is hard. Because: I want to think that there's a lot more to what I'm seeing. I am certainly missing cinematic references that Jojo and team are making (I haven't watched Queer As Folk, for instance). Mew's face popping out of the bathtub? That has me wondering if I'm missing a cinematic reference there.

But at the same time, I wonder if by just observing the Only Friends crew, that I'm picking up on enough. When I was in my twenties, living in New York City, going to college...I was still trying to figure people out. I was absolutely SURROUNDED by people, and I couldn't help but think, everyday -- what is it that makes these people tick?

And I found myself regularly shocked at how mean people were. Very often, I'd just be like -- what the actual fuck, why are you trying so hard to be a massive dick? And, who knows -- maybe people were thinking the same thing about me.

That was when I was young. I just -- I didn't know that much about people. Really, what I didn't know -- and what I really NEEDED to know, and what I learned about myself in that decade and the next -- was how to manage myself around anybody, so as to preserve myself from any unpredictable pain that might come from someone else. In other words... I needed to fucking grow up.

Part of that self-management was trying on identities. Could I fake being a stronger person? Sure, I definitely tried. I tried with clothes, with new slang, with trying new activities, with drinking. That's just normal for a lass in their twenties.

The Only Friends crew -- they are assholes. Many of them were trying on change a couple of weeks ago. Mew experienced a HUGE identity shift during this episode.

But what they all embody to me, in this moment in their lives, is a kind of everyday toxicity -- a self-absorbed perspective, so tunneled internally into each and every one of them, that none of them are realizing that the energy they put out is colliding and having effects on others.

Like -- it's kind of shocking and twisted to watch. But when I think about it, when I remember what it was like to be in a huge city and to be in college and post-college: there's a part of me that remembers being CONSTANTLY surprised that people were just massive jerks, everyday, and again, who knows -- I think people likely thought that I was a jerk, too, for thinking of myself and leading myself with my life.

People, most people, grow out of these stages, as they get older, get more experienced in their years, maybe get more political in their dealings with others. I can't condemn this group of university students fully, as I hold hope (I'm a mom, damn it) that they'll grow into more fully robust and empathic people. But they ain't there yet. I'm not sure my turning stones gives me more insight to them than in relating to my own experiences as a former twentysomething. It has me thinking, as someone who loves turning those stones in my beloved dramas.

That all being said. Those two other themes in this episode have me thinking -- the elements of life and gambling.

We saw Mew play with fire (fucking finally, my man). And we saw lots of water -- water in the pool, water in the tub with Sand and Ray.

Water puts out fire. Mew tries to fake-drown (lol) Boston in the pool. Later on, Mew lets Boston know that he (Mew) can take Boston down, but won't. Mew is trying to control the fires that he's lit, and the ones that have already been burning.

My question to Mew is: do you know how to do what you are doing, or what you want to do?

I don't quite think so, and I think that "Welcome to Las Vegas" shirt he was wearing at Boston's house indicated as much.

(Uh, first of all, chain life, Book! MORE, MORE!)

Mew has decided to become a gambler. Let's think of all the metaphors! Mew has decided to roll the dice and possibly move past the pass line. He's decided to play his odds. He even STACKED his odds -- going to a new gay bar, enticing Drake Gap, going back to Gap's place, stealing the sex tape from Gap's computer, threatening Gap with reporting him for a crime, going to BOSTON'S HOUSE, TALKING TO BOSTON'S DAD, showing Boston the copy of the sex tape, THREATENING BOSTON, MAKING BOSTON BEG, showing MORAL SUPERIORITY OVER BOSTON, throwing the flash drive at Boston, and walking away. Like, if that were a metaphor for actually playing craps, first of all, lol, the pit guy would check Mew's ID, get him a players' card, and encourage him to move to the high limits room, being like, WHAT is this motherfucker DOING, but we want him doing more of it, he'll make us more money -- once he starts fucking things up.

Mew's trying on a new identity. He already was on the road to it, getting that LASIK for Top. He's just continuing to move forward with it. He's going to play with nastiness, but still try to come out on Top.

Trying on new identities. It is so normal when you're young -- I did that. Trying on what fits for whatever reason you are feeling at that moment -- if you're rebounding, if you're healing, if you're bored. Mew is embarrassed, maybe even ashamed, maybe even regretful that his first relationship ended up as a failure.

And now he's figuring out how to recover -- by taking a gamble, and playing with the exact same mundane, everyday nastiness that he's seen in everyone around him.

P.S. Ephemerality and permanence? That fire burned the memory that Top tried to create with Mew (cc @twig-tea and @lurkingshan here). And, gambling? SO ephemeral. Buh-bye, money and pride. Ray switching back and forth between Mew and Sand? Ephemeral crushitude. (SAND. SMDH. I KNOW RAY'S DAD SAID SOMETHING TO YOU, BUT STILL, SMDH.) Nick turning on Boston. Boston begging Mew to hold back on the permanent impact of the sex tape on Boston's dad's career.

And the ephemerality of movement: the clothes in this episode said it all. Las Vegas, NYC, Stanford. These young folks can just... disappear if they want to. And they just might.

(G'DAY, EPHEMERALITY SQUAD! @ranchthoughts @slayerkitty @distant-screaming @twig-tea @neuroticbookworm @lurkingshan @clara-maybe-ontheroad @thatgirl4815 @chickenstrangers @wen-kexing-apologist)

[mostly-marvel-musings]

Rhodes has probably walked in on Tony and his s/o so many times that at this point he's just like "oh the two seals are at it again... EVERYONE, STAY OUT OF THE KITCHEN, THE SEALS ARE THERE" which probably just ruins the sex because now Tony and his s/o can't stop laughing, while the avengers are outside complaining because "c'mon, we eat there! don't they have a full fucking floor for them, why are they in the common kitchen!?!"

Voyeurism

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader

Warnings: 18+ smut and fluff and humour and all the good things in life!

.

Yet another clang echoed through the kitchen as a metal bowl clattered on the marble, forcing a giggle to escape your lips before Tony’s lips silenced it.

Hearing a door unlock, you broke the kiss to listen in on a possible walk in on your semi-undressed state. Tony simply shrugged, continuing like nothing could bother the man while he was focused on his task; which was to slip his fingers inside those leggings you wore that made your butt look amazing.

He had wasted no time in cornering you in the kitchen as you returned from a sparring session, shoving you against the counter before slanting his hungry mouth on yours, hands groping your breasts that looked tantalising to him.

“Are we giving them a show again?” You smirked, eyes hooded with lust as Tony momentarily halted his ministrations to look at his art work that was your flushed skin, swollen lips, beard burn that left it’s delicious red marks along the column of your throat and neck.

“Honey it’s not our fault they keep barging in on us while we’re minding our business.” He murmured, giving you a wink before turning you around and pushing you against the countertop.

Back against his firm chest, you gasped as Tony’s hand slipped inside your panties, parting your legs by wedging his knee in between to open you up for him.

“It’s a common kitchen, Tony…” you trailed off, weaving your fingers through his shorter, soft hair as he soothed the marks he’d made with his tongue.

“Mmhmm. Which I paid for.”

Even from the back of your head, he could tell you’d rolled your eyes at his statement; he parted your lower lips and revealed your clit to swipe his thumb teasingly against the bud.

Between little mewls and gasps, Tony worked you up like he always did, arousal pooled between your legs which he gathered on his fingers to slide them in your entrance, leaving a burning desire for more.

There were distant footsteps you could hear approaching, meaning someone was on their way to the kitchen. You felt Tony’s fingers slip out before the man licked them clean, causing your cheeks to heat up.

“Damnit Tony, don’t be a tease.” You couldn’t care less if anybody were to walk in on the two of you right now, you had needs and this man was going to be the death of you.

He chuckled at your whining, flipping you around once again and pushing his tongue past your lips, allowing you to taste yourself on him. The authority with which Tony kissed you had you weak in knees every single time, he owned every inch of you and his kisses consumed you.

The way his fingers tugged on your hair, pulling it just enough to elicit a moan from your lips; a smirk that you wished to wipe off his handsome face with the way your body behaved so obedient for him.

“I would absolutely love nothing more than to bend you over this counter and fuck you senseless but baby, this ass right here, it’s all mine. Wouldn’t want anyone else to see it.” Tony slapped your ass for effect, pulling it flush against him to let you feel his boner that was straining against his pants.

“That didn’t stop you before..” you challenged him, palming his clothed cock to watch his mouth fall open and his breath shudder.

“Maybe I have plans for you in the shower today. Shut that pretty mouth of yours by stuffing my cock in it, hmm?”

Grabbing your hand, he pulled you towards your bedroom, not noticing Nat and Steve with their scandalised faces as both of them emerged in the kitchen.

“Stay away from the common areas you rabbits!” You heard Nat yell after the two of you, making you giggle as Tony entered the bedroom after leading you in and purposely slammed the door shut.

[nourrris]

STUCKY.

i've previously made a ramble about how 'steves ending' upset me and how i felt like it was just not really fitting to his character, and i've recently (and i mean i literally just paused it midcredits to write this) watched winter soldier for the first time, and i cannot FATHOM how correct i was but also HOW MUCH WORSE it all was and i didnt know.

first off, i did not like the fact that in endgame he ended up getting with peggy, it was upsetting to me because i had watched civil war and felt it was a very confusing decision, because in civil war he decides to discard everything he has so far built with tony and the other people, (and at some point, somewhat also natasha) for the sake of bucky, which is in my opinion was frankly fucking insane, but nevertheless he still did it, everything just for bucky.

another part in civil war that frankly bothered me a bit, was peggys death, now thinking about it i would have thought it was going to be an end of an era for steves character, (but i watched the movies heavily out of order so i am only now thinking about that) peggy dying would have made perfect sense for steve to finally move on, even if he got with the sharon lady (which was peggys niece iirc) which personally i wouldnt particularly count as 'getting over' peggy if he was going for direct family but i mean anything counted at that point

so why is it that after everything that happened, that speech at peggys funeral clearly meaning something to steve which made him decide to go for bucky - literally all go to shit? he decided to risk everything for him, to finally have him back in his life, especially with the fact that the speech and everything happy at PEGGYS funeral, his literal prior(?) love interest, it made like.. complete sense for it to be a form of moving on romantically of all things, and take the risk to go after for the next most important person to him.

end of civil war comes, he defends bucky through and through even though tony (sort of) was rightfully upset, and was almost completely and willing to kill tony stark to save bucky, and he sure as hell did a number on him anyways, knowing that entire fight was definitely going to cause the large fallout between them, without even knowing if bucky was going to stick around, (which spoiler alert, he didnt! .. for his own reasons, that i cannot blame).

infinity war happens, he finally gets back to bucky after their separation and after his life sorta crumbled a bit because he was literally a fugitive, they fight together than, for the billionth time, he loses bucky, but this time to the snap. the past two times they were separated was due to a choice made by bucky, (first time.. was not) so if he was torn out of his hands again just like in captain america's first movie, the most understandable response is that he wanted to get him back, he of course was not happy he lost bucky, or anybody at that matter.

endgame happens, and near the end they finally get their chance to be back together, same with everybody else. see i know steve clearly struggled to get over people, or anything as a whole - knowing how stuck on he was on peggy, so his actions throughout civil war and further on sort of made sense since bucky was finally back in his grasp after losing him brutally originally, so .. why is it, that he managed to get over him so easily suddenly at the end of the endgame and went back to be with peggy?

i can tell now that he seemingly never got over peggy, which really makes still no sense because it felt like a finality of that arc in civil war, but nevertheless.. he still did go back to her, willingly losing absolutely everything he had now, after fighting tooth and nail to get bucky back, after being so willing to let the winter soldier KILL him, saying "cause im with you till the end of the line", and then completely disregarding that writing and making him do exactly the opposite, he was with him in civil war, and after that, so when he finally had his chance to actually exist with him in a form of peace.. he let that all ago.

also i believe the entire idea of steve going back makes no sense, it feels like a very giant plot hole, because i dont understand how him going back had no repercussions on the future? i genuinely cannot even understand why he ended up at the last part in endgame either, because seemingly it meant he was always in their world?? which what???? i dont know but it felt like a very forced ending.

and frankly, shows how just weirdly scared they are of making characters have a queer dynamic, it wouldnt feel like 'forced diversity' when their dynamic was so self sacrificial and clearly a bond that preceded friendship (in my fine ol' opinion), they could have done absolutely anything to make captain america have a fulfilling ending, like simply retiring, but they didn't, which again i just dont get and really think it messed up the timelines on stuff.

anyways... marvel stop being homophobic (/hj)

(currently watching the first avenger movie and NO FUCKIGN WAYYYY HES ABOUT TO MARCH INTO AUSTRIA FOR BUCKY THIS IS SO MUCH GAYER THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS)

[shwarmii]

how can you like drunk angst over first kiss?? 🥺

anon is regarding this post here, specifically my tags

characters discussed belong to @dakotawritesif / @disenchantedif

omg, so easily lol

bc its not just drunk angst, it is drunk angst about knowing their ex is gonna DIE, UNNATURALLY, AND SOON and pining/having never made up with them

but also im an asmr/audio-roleplay connoisseur*, so like, uh, also the following here. yeah. this primes me up to LOVE drunk ex scenario regret/pining shit lol (you'll have to excuse all these audios being men btw, i have a soft spot for deep voices and there isnt many deep-voiced women VAs in the audio-roleplay community (unfortunately foR MEEEE UGHH), much less many that have a video involving this niche Drunk Ex trope anyway lmao rip (same with the audios all being either "for Anybody" or "for Females". i don't currently have any "for Males" in this niche, even tho im the type of enby that listens to all three types of "for [you]" audios. alas. boo hiss))

none of these are "Luci-Inserts" btw, moreso "Evidence of why OF COURSE I AM MORE HYPED FOR DRUNK HALLWAY OVER FIRST KISS", like a vision board kinda sorta lmao

When Your Ex Drunk Calls You (I Miss You) (Slurred Speech) (Funny) (ASMR) (M4A).. (Fun fact: this VA is Scottish. also M4A = Male For Anyone, not just M4M (male for male) or M4F (male for female))

(this one is by the same Scottish VA) When You Drink With Your Ex (Kissing) (Exes to Lovers) (Drunk) (Regret) (Wholesome) (M4A) (ASMR)

(more of this Scottish VA bc he makes me laugh) When Your Crush Drunkenly Confesses To You (Singing Idiot) (Taking Care Of Him) (Silly) (ASMR) (M4A) (bonus there is a morning-after part two to this one yay)

Your Drunk Best Friend Wants You Gor Valentines [M4A] [Tsundere] [Confession] [Sober Listener] (and this one has a part two about the morning-after too)

ASMR Voice: I Should Have Told You [M4A] [Drunk Voicemail] [Ex-boyfriend] [Missing you] [Regret]

Audio Roleplay for Women | "Orbit" | Drunken Confession

Audio RP: Your Ex-boyfriend Asks For Another Chance [M4A] (not drunk but i love this one) (also it has a part two as well yayyy)

this one ((M4A but he does say you have a "pretty face") bc i do like Luci being upset someone is going to hurt the MC) and this one ((M4F) because i like the frustration lmao rip) also fit the vibe but neither are drunk or exes lmao rip

like, you would think as someone who is chronically ill to the point that my meds say "absolutely no alcohol (and one used to say no weed, idk if im still on that one, id have to go check)" that i would not give a shit about drunk scenarios buT I DO LOVE IT IN FICTION SO MUCH. my irl friends also like getting drunk on/off, or high, and my forced sobriety due to meds (and also family history, let's be honest. i do come from a long line of addicts, apparently, best i dont get involved, and i never have been) means i get to play Designated Driver pretty often. so i do recognize some realities/fantasties in the scenario. but also, god, i love the trope because it allows for such forced vulnerabilities, i fucking love whump fics, and a drunk ex fic is really just a whump fic with no bruises

and, ngl, i do think it is more likely we will get a First Kiss pov somewhere down the line if it loses than i think we will get a Hallway pov if it loses

plus, they were like what, 10?? 11??? idk how old they were when Luci/MC got together. but i know these fuckers are fresh out of high school and Luci is getting drunk, which means biTCHES ARE UNDERAGE DRINKING (which is an interesting characterization for Luci that i think reveals a lot about the Rivera parents as well as Luci's connections to wealth/alcohol), so there is that drama of "hide, hide, hide!!" if nothing else

and, again, then there's not only the angst of "ah, my ex-partner and/or -best friend" and the wanting to make up platonically/romantically but there is also the angst of "i knOW YOU'RE GOING TO GET MURDERED SOON AND IM NOT READY TO GO TO YOUR FUNERAL BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO STOP THIS" kind of "lost time", "call for rain-check until you can't" angle too. plus, i could see Luci being protective or frustrated or terrified, there are so many fun angles no matter the platonic/romantic additional feelings involved. and, because of how this pov works, there isnt going to be a kiss or anything happening. so it's just going to be slow-burn (to friends or lovers, idk your mc) and pining (platonic pining is a thing), i love that for me specifically lmao

but i do, like, get it. i get what you mean. if i thought this ask was mean-spirited, i wouldve deleted it and not answered; but i read this as "lol yeah that is fucked of me huh lmao you right". bc, YEAH, first kiss is romantic, drunk in your shared hallways is NOT lmao rip but i dont care if its romantic or not, i care that its making my guts get all twisted up. and the angst of (1) drunk ex that needs to taken care of (or needs to run away from you, either or) (2) thinks youre going to be murdered/in an accident and die soon and (3) may/may not still be in love with you and (4) knows they dont have enough time to reconcile with you and make-up for lost time... ngl, that is going to impact me more than a first kiss. im ready for the tragedy. fucking love this kinda shit

also i have my own hcs about my mc, Giselle "Gigi" Kraven, and Luci Rivera's first kiss. so. that probably also plays a role in all this bUT HEY!! IM STILL TRYING FOR THE 50/50 LMAO RIP WE ARE HELPING EACH OTHER, MY COMRADE 🤝 YOU GET (DOOMED) FLUFF AND I GET (ALSO DOOMED) DRUNK ANGST, THAT'S A WIN-WIN LOL

*i would like to add: i have no idea if any of these VAs have drama or something. i dont pay attention to the fandoms, except vaguely for Redacted Audios because of the theories and world-building happening there (which the video here doesnt have much to do with), but otherwise i am so fucking ignorant bc i do not look these people up, i just watch their videos. i have been burned too many times by the Steven Universe fandom and other such communities and whatnot to get involved in fandoms i am only casually into, so i just only stick my nose into fandoms/creators i am die-hard into and dont delve into the rest, thanks for understanding if i may be out of the loop ✌️

[deadwriter16]

Who are your top 7 favorite ships ever (can be canon or non canon) from any media? Why do you love them? Thanks 🌻

Also, random, but is there a story behind your name "deadwriter16"?

Hi anon!! Yall are seriously asking me such hard questions omggg but I will try my best! I am definitely forgetting ships but I'm just gonna write down seven ships that I love in no particular order!

also: there will likely be some spoilers ahead for some of these pieces of media so tread carefully. i'll tag all the shows below too :)

bkdk (bakugo and deku, bnha) - of course. i will always and forever love them. they mean so much to me and they are soulmates to me no matter what anybody else says. i mean just look at my ao3. its proof that they are soulmates fr. anyway id say i love them because i always really related to bakugou, especially before i left for college, and i thought that his and deku's love for each other was really beautiful. they will always have a special place in my heart

kyoru (kyo and tohru, fruits basket) - they made me believe in heterosexuality again lowkey. these two will also always have a special place in my heart. i'm a huge sucker for that selfless sweetheart character being selfish just for that one like angry dude who they picked out of the rain and claimed as theirs, (see: bkdk), and kyoru is like the best manifestation of that trope. they have permanently altered my brain chemistry and cured my depression

cece and schmidt (new girl) - idk if they have a ship name. these two. what is there to say about these two. so so much. their arc and their love story means absolutely everything to me. especially seeing a fellow indian woman get her happiness made me so happy, and both of their character development leading to them falling in love with each other,,, my favorite episodes in new girl are their episodes. they are THE love story. i want what they have

coliver (connor and oliver, htgawm) - these two also mean so so much to me. how to get away with murder is one of my comfort shows, which i know is a super weird thing to say, and ive always loved coliver. theyre both fucked up people, but they love each other and i personally LOVE the story and ending they got. their wedding episode is such a good episode and honestly i think i just love them because something about them is really real, even through all the hardship and toxicity and jail time, there's still love

mondler (monica and chandler, friends) - had they gotten together in season one they wouldve been UNSTOPPABLE. they are the friends to lovers blueprint and everything about them makes me smile. s5 is my favorite season of friends for a reason. their story is so important to me because they just like...kinda always loved each other? whether as friends or more there was just always love there, and it manifested itself in different ways but it was always there. best friends to lovers is my favorite thing ever and they are it !!!

maddie & chim (911) - yes yes i know buddie is fantastic and all but maddie and chim are my favorite simply because i love chimney with everything i am and i want him to have what he wants. also their baby is really cute. shout out jee yun. also also they've been through so much together and apart, and although i have my grievances with how some parts of their relationship was handled in the show, i will always love those two. no matter what, their love for each other always shows and shines and i just love them. also i am not caught up with the season 8 so nobody tell me anything

claire and phil (modern family) - i think these two were the first couple to make me believe that marriages can actually last. i thought, if these two polar opposites could survive all this time, then maybe there's a little hope for all of us. i love their different ways of showing love and how they can stay strong even through fights, and they are definitely my favorite modern family couple. people are always trying to talk about their toxic aspects but tbh that just makes them more real as a couple. and they still love each other throughout it all, even though they're both a little insane

honorable mention: jessica and louis (fresh off the boat), not done with the show yet but im on season 3 and any interaction between them makes me giggle and kick my feet. i wouldve put them on this list but since i havent finished the show i dont think i can compleyely speak on them yet. but as of rn i love them dearly and they are icons

also A.P. bio mention for jack and lynette bc they NEVER SHOULDVE BROKEN UP and then the SHOW GOT CANCELED and now ill NEVER KNOW IF THEY GET BACK TOGETHER but in my heart they did. glenn howerton tell me what was supposed to happen PLEASE

as for deadwriter 16,,, there's no story. when i was young and first coming up with this username i was just kinda like what do i associate myself? and back then i was a bit of a oooh death and darkness kinda person (see: my early works. generally very dark). so i anyway i was like ok ill do dead. keep in mind i was fourteen. and then writer came from the fact that i am a writer. and 16 is my birthday. hence deadwriter16!

this took me a while but thank u so much for the ask anon!!! i forgot how fun asks are lol bc now im so bad at answering them. life gets in the way i guess. anyway thanks again!

[maxwell-grant]

🔥 The Bat!Joker ship

I don't think the Joker actually has much to say about Batman as a person or that he works as a meaningful tragic dark mirror to Bruce Wayne (in fact why would he, he actively does not want to know shit about Bruce Wayne or whatever he himself used to be before he flattened himself into the Joker), and the idea that he needs to inspired far more boring, shallow, self-obsessed and bad Batman stories than good ones. Even The Killing Joke, which I do like, only pulled it off by giving the Joker an entire origin story and an endpoint and had to outright make him break character for good in-text for the parallel to be achieved in the end. Joker is one of the most versatile villains of all time, but I don't think he lends himself well into being a leading character of complex and personal character drama, and they basically have to reconstruct him from scratch and or/make a new character out of him everytime they do that (the Telltale games, Joker 2019, whatever the fuck White Knight was going for). It's a waste of every other character you could be applying that effort into AND it's a waste of what already makes the Batman x Joker dynamic great (also frequently means he's doing bad retreads of material Two-Face is way more suited for but that's another topic)

I don't really ship Batman with anybody personally (I'm onboard for a compelling pitch if presented but shipping is not a thing I really care about much), but I do find myself compelled by and rejecting Batman x Joker in equal measure because, in a way, it's too "perfect". Nobody gives Bruce more permission to exist and be Batman than the Joker does. Nobody is as tailor-made perfect a justification for his life's work, and thus himself, than the Joker is. Nobody accepts, and wants, the existence of Batman the way the Joker does. This absolutely does not go both ways, but Bruce knows he concedes the clown more leg room into his life with every repeat engagement, he can't deny the part Joker plays in his world.

They clearly belong together as much as they could possibly belong with anyone within their stupid futile forever battle. But the thing is, if you close the gap on that battle, that's it for them. It's the end of the line. Batman and Joker already work very similar to how romance stories work: you have to pile more and more bullshit obstacles between your characters to overcome, because when they're done, and they get together for good, that's the end of the story. It's about the yearning and the overcoming, the consumation is where it ends.

I feel like having these two get involved romantically or sexually just puts a finishing dot on the billion and one ways they already dance around the matter. It's the same problem with Joker figuring out Batman's identity elevated a thousand fold, it just ruins the game, and then what else do they have? Worse, it makes it so one of them wins, because one will have made it official, and the other will have to compromise foundationally to cede room for the other, and thus there's a win that can never be walked back. That can be very compelling stuff, but also, you ended the game between Batman and the Joker, and worse, you did it with one of them having a clear victory over the other. Not saying it can't be done, not even saying it shouldn't be done, but it's not the kind of thing you do lightly, and it's not something you do if you want to keep telliing Batman x Joker stories afterwards.

[mandy4ever69420]

do you think gallavich are ‘toxic’ or even abusive? i see takes like these a lot and i sort of understand where they’re coming from but also don’t at all.

when someone describes the toxicity it’s usually just about them both having problems and being not the fairest to eachother because of it. but that’s like… every relationship. mickey was closeted with an abusive homophobic father, ian knew from the start he was getting into that. ian’s bipolar, obviously that makes him have irrational thoughts about mickey leaving him/not loving him etc etc like every relationship is gonna have some sore spot of insecurities.

about abuse… i didn’t find the scene where ian hits mickey bad. they wrestle for a bit and then giggle like two teenagers in love and kiss. like that didn’t badly effect either they were so happy it was basically foreplay for them idk that’s how I see it!

the other time when mickey hits ian, yeah i think it was fucked that mickey beat ian in that scene but ian was also harassing a guy who just got beat and raped and promised his life away into a marriage he doesn’t want idk i find his response pretty excusable, and then he spends the rest of s4 caring for ian so.. i don’t care about that

i don’t know, i certainly don’t see how they’re abusive as there is no power dynamic and neither are badly effected by these fights. and i guess i see toxicity as a relationship that harms both people and ultimately shouldn’t exist, but shameless goes out of its way to show that they make eachother better people and literally cannot be with anyone else, because their unconventionality makes them be more comfortable with each-other. like they’d be wayyyy more toxic without eachother bc they’d never get better!!

this basically just became a rant for me but i sent this in bc ive been thinking about it a lot and thought you might have some different or interesting thoughts!

oh i absolutely agree with you. they're definitely not abusive & toxic has no specific definition but personally i wouldn't use that either

wrt: abuse you hit the nail on the head with power dynamics. i really think people will claim "abuse" a lot just to complain that they don't like it or that they think someone's not acting right (true. they often don't act right. because they're troubled people) without actually understanding the meaning

"toxic" doesn't have exact meaning but also, yeah, i take it to mean "worsens the health or self esteem of one of both parties without specific abuse" which ian and mickey demonstrably don't do. for their faults they really do their best together. Also i mean they had rough points. and if someone wants to use "toxic" to mean "treat each other in ways they shouldn't" then it's applicable some of the time.

probably anybody who liked a relationship between two women on tv in the 2010s (and possibly before, but i was too Small to know) can remember that "toxic" just meant like "remotely interesting or complex" from just... homophobes. blah, blah, this eventually got clowned on a lot and now we get memes about loving toxic yuri. but i still don't like the term.

& it's true that ian and mickey do have like. crises and become miserable at times during their relationship. but this is largely due to external factors. especially at that, ones that keep them apart: terry-juvie-terry-juvie-terry-ian unexpectedly developing mental illness that neither of them knows how to cope with-svetlana-monica-prison-prison-prison. again the idea of being into gallavich and not vehemently opposing the prison system is bizarre to me. um.

i've seen people call ian and mickey toxic to sort of temper the idea of seeing them as aspirational. but i think this is a misunderstanding of what people who say "i want a love like theirs" or whatever actually Mean. i don't think they're looking for the Mitski I Don't Smoke part. probably they want someone they love that much that they'd stick with them through whatever may come no matter how scary or horrific

i want to note i'm pretty sure in addition to ian essentially harassing a recent survivor of violent rape, that mickey, despite being a pretty violent guy (because of how brains process abuse etc etc) doesn't really hit ian until ian starts the physical side of the altercation. that is bananas restraint given the context. as a teenager. mickeyyyyy😭💕

absolutely someone who was NOT prone to violence would not react that way, but that's what ian was in fact looking for, it's something he finds largely charming and admirable about mickey & and it's something we can see mickey is horribly upset to see he is able to direct at ian

also, i see ian's goal in that scene as sort of seeking "punishment" for what he sees as his own guilt. it works and mickey acts a way i don't consider aspirational because ian was sort of using him to externalize his own self hatred. Man. fantastic scene 😭

& with ian hitting mickey like. that one is for sure weird for mickey not hitting back immediately. which i think ian almost certainly overthought later, contributing to his fears about his "burden" to mickey. ian can't see that his current state of volatility is temporary, because he's IN it. breakdowns always feel permanent at the time.

& i've seen people say that that was like.. very detrimental to mickeys gentleness? which. i don't really agree with. first of all mickey is clearly still a very loving person. but more to the point i see s5 as like, his level of absolute maximum panic, influencing how much of his. ugh. big sweet beautiful heart he's willing to actually show. which is why he didn't hit back. he knew ian was particularly vulnerable and going through it. and yeah this wound up a sweet moment anyway at that.

NTM i think ian was deliberately trying to invoke a little nostalgia with the way they fight and then fall into each other. and trying to find the violence in their love just keeps getting harder and harder (like having to deliberately trigger mickey by calling him a faggot) because they can remember each time how much they DONT like actually hurting each other. and y'know. this leads them to grow and improve as people 👍

& lastly of all. Yeah i cannot imagine how fucked they'd be with other people😭 they're very "ESH: never change, just never involve anyone else in what you've got going on" i mean we saw ian fuck over trevor in new and inventive ways. and the byron thing wasn't even a relationship mickey had any real interest in... brutal.

[cyberrat]

86th Batch of Fics: 5th Fill

Hanzo/Cassidy – Off Limits AU – a/b/o; subspace; panic attack – Cole has quite a few demons in his closet.

---

All in all, Hanzo took getting his mouth knotted way better than Cole would have ever imagined. He does let him feel his teeth from time to time, but he’s not entirely sure whether that comes from him being an asshole and occasionally fighting instinct, or whether it’s just fatigue eventually setting in.

Cole gently massages his jaw hinges as they wait for the swelling to go down enough that Hanzo can pull back. He watches his eyes grow heavy, his blinking slowing down into slow motion. He looks tired, but that does not feel right. Cole slowly spears his fingers through Hanzo’s black hair. The petting only makes him look more drunk.

“Hey… you good?” he asks in a low voice, using his thumb to lightly pull up on Hanzo’s eyelid and have a look at his pupils. They’re huge. He looks like he’s been drugged, which is kind of hilarious in itself.

In response, the pup just hums. His head is starting to tilt to the side until finally he puts it against Cole’s bruised thigh. It’s all a bit awkward and a bit uncomfortable, but apparently that does not quite ping on Hanzo’s radar. He’s just happily drooling on Cole’s cock, calm as can be.

Cole wonders if that’s what subspace is. It feels odd that it would happen now; especially with how pushy and dominant Hanzo usually is, but… well. It’s not like he has a lot of experience to draw on in this regard. He’s never had to deal with something like this before. It starts to dawn on him that with Hanzo around, these unprecedented occurrences keep happening.

He can’t say that he loathes it. It’s a nice change of pace, even though doing this shit with a ticking time bomb like this young Alpha seems supremely self-destructive in and off itself.

“There you go,” he rasps once his knot has gone down enough that his cock slips out from Hanzo’s lax mouth all on its own. The pup shifts a little, trying to mouth on the spongy tip again – probably wanting to suckle him right back in but fuck that noise.

He’s done. He feels absolutely knackered. He briefly replaces his cock with his thumb, watching with sardonic amusement as Hanzo immediately starts suckling on it like a babe. Ah… that’ll be something to remember for the ages.

He lets him have at it for a minute or two, then pulls his thumb away from him. Hanzo lets it happen without protest. He just stares up at him with eyes black as night and a positively tranquil expression. Cole goes to grab him underneath his arms and pull him up the bed to cuddle with him, but that puts him in a different predicament.

Well not a predicament per se, but…

Cole pauses, staring at his left hand, fingers intertwined with the young Alpha’s. His expression tightens as he looks at it. When had Hanzo grabbed a hold of him? He could not say. He did not feel a thing. He doesn’t feel it now, even though he is straight up looking at it.

It’s not a big deal of course. Really, it isn’t… except that somehow it is. What if he had squeezed down without realizing and broken Hanzo’s goddamn fingers? The thought has his heart beating faster, blood rushing to his head. He needs to get back to the Gorge and have the mechanics take a look at his goddamn arm. He needs to get it recalibrated. He needs to get some goddamn feeling back in it because right now it feels like he doesn’t have a left arm at all and that freaks him out more than he likes to admit.

The knowledge that his mechanics are so far away doesn’t help either. They’re specialists; they’ve been dealing with his arm for a couple decades now; able to upgrade it bit by bit until it has become like this: looking and feeling pretty much indistinguishable to a normal body part. That also means, though, that he does not trust anybody else to fuck around with it.

And they’re so, so far away. His body breaks out in goosebumps, cold sweat starting on his brow.

He needs to… he needs to get his hand back. He suddenly very much does not want Hanzo to be holding him down with his warm body.

Cole needs to use his right hand to slowly untangle their fingers. It is shaking. He starts to bare his teeth subconsciously as he peels Hanzo’s fingers open one by one. The pup is only slowly moving his head and watching it happen. There’s no real understanding in his face. Cole’s heart pumps even faster. After such a nice, slow orgasm he’s had, it feels more than uncomfortable.

Dimly he realizes that he’s teetering on the edge of a panic attack which does not… it’s not right. Not now. Not after watching Hanzo in real time slowly slip into subspace for him.

The pup shifts a little. He starts to look groggy and confused, pushing himself up on his hands with visible effort. His arms are shaking wildly, like his muscles are not quite responding to what he wants them to do.

“S s’mthing… wrong?”

Cole slaps his right hand over his face and wipes at the oily sweat coating it. He swallows thickly and shakes his head, forcing the grimace on his face into something akin to a smile.

“Nah… no, of course not. Here- lie down for a spell an’ I’ll get you something to drink before we have a nice long rest.

“But-”

Cole does not listen to whatever Hanzo has to protest and rolls out of bed. He all but flees into the bathroom to splash cold water into his face, though it only marginally helps him in calming down as he still can’t feel a damn thing in his left hand. He grabs a hold of his forearm, fingers digging in against the pretty much invisibly panel on the inside of it.

He stands there for a while, head curiously empty as he starts to calm down again. It’s only a couple weeks more and then he’ll get to get it repaired. It’s okay. He can deal with it. He doesn’t like dealing with it, but it’s not like a malfunction like this happens often.

It could be worse. He could have lost all control over the limb.

Just calm down. He closes his eyes and focuses on his breathing; nice and slow and deep. His racing heart calms down eventually and once he feels like his legs aren’t jello anymore and he won’t just faceplant as he moves, he gets back out again.

Hanzo is still on the bed. He’s dragged himself up until he could bury his face in Cole’s pillow and is not moving a muscle even though he must be able to hear the older Alpha putter around.

His eyes are still dazed looking, but also guarded when Cole taps him on the shoulder and offers him something to drink.

He won’t remember a thing once we wake up. Cole crookedly smiles at Hanzo, petting through his hair.

“There ya go. Ya did real well. Enjoyed yourself, huh?”

He slides into the bed, rearranging their bodies. Hanzo hums vaguely, pushing his head beneath Cole’s chin and his face against his throat. Cole winces but when the young man doesn’t even try to bite, he lets it slide and tugs the blanket across them.

He closes his eyes; but honestly? He should have known that it would be a bad fucking idea to go to sleep after such an episode.

[themculibrary]

Asexual Characters Masterlist 4

part one, part two, part three

Artist Not For Sale (ao3) - EiraLloyd, me1och steve/bucky T, 12k

Summary: “What about the artist? Is he for sale too?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. What was it with entitled assholes who thought it was cute to joke about buying whole artists? This woman’s flirty tone made it even worse.

But Steve just smiled. “Sorry,” he said, then pointed at a sign he’d hung up sometime between the last time Bucky had visited and now — a white sheet with the words Artist not for sale printed in black ink. “The artist isn’t for sale. It’s this gallery’s policy.”

don't need anybody else (ao3) - OnlyForward G, 1k

Summary: Peter comes out to Tony as aroace. Tony—confused but nevertheless accepting, does some research on the subject.

(And promptly has a realisation of his own)

Everything I Never Told You (ao3) - stub_z bucky/natasha M, 3k

Summary: After a night out with James, Natasha is left with a hard decision. Tell James the truth and risk losing him, or keep lying and playing the part she has been for her entire life.

First Impression, Second Thoughts (ao3) - Ko_te tony/natasha T, 1k

Summary: Tony was panicking. He and Natasha had been in a relationship for a while now, and she would probably expect sex very soon. After all, how could she know that he, who was literally an internationally known playboy, didn't like sex?

Natasha was panicking. She and Tony had been in a relationship for a while now, and he would probably expect sex very soon. After all, how could he know that she, who was known for looks and being a honeypot assassin, didn't care about sex?

first time that i felt connected to anything (ao3) - orphan_account steve/bucky T, 38k

Summary: Steve has been out of the ice for a few years now, but outside of the Avengers, he's had difficulty making a real connection. Especially a romantic connection.

Enter Bucky, everything Steve was ever looking for and never knew he needed.

Happy Anniversary (ao3) - ShutUpGwen steve/bucky M, 11k

Summary: “You can’t just give up, Buck.” He answers softly. “You just haven’t found the right partner yet. I’m sure they’re out there.”

Bucky shakes his head “That’s where you’re wrong, pal. The right partner for me ain’t out there, he’s in here. I found him 15 years ago.”

“I can’t stand in the way of what you need, Buck.” Steve feels his eyes pricking with tears already. He hates this conversation so much. “You know that.”

“Goddammit, Steve.” Bucky snaps. “I love you , and if that means I’ll never have sex again then so fucking be it. Fucking doesn’t make me happy. You do. ”

“Oh” is all he can say in return.

In which Steve is asexual, Bucky loves him more than he likes sex and they keep their promises to each other despite the world trying to tear them apart.

It's Not Wrong (ao3) - TheAsexualofSpades G, 2k

Summary: Sex Sells.

One True Love.

Your Partner Completes You.

Peter doesn't know why the world is obsessed with love and romance and sex. Sometimes it can all just be a bit...much.

Love All of Me (ao3) - Nixie_DeAngel steve/tony T, 1k

Summary: And…and that right there was what was really holding him back from being honest, from telling his boyfriend that he was asexual and had absolutely no interest whatsoever in sex or sexual acts of any kind beyond a little heavy kissing.

Or, Steve struggles in telling Tony something important about himself.

purple and green (ao3) - lethewren G, 3k

Summary: Sometimes, Peter feels like his love isn't enough - especially on the days when phrases like 'more than friends' exist, as if to taunt him.

Luckily, he's got some people who can teach him otherwise.

puzzle (ao3) - OnlyForward G, 4k

Summary: tony stark was forty five years old when peter parker explained to him what asexuality was, and his whole world came crashing down around his shoulders, like he was atlas letting go of the sky.

Stay the Same (ao3) - Anonymous G, 1k

Summary: Thor has sex with a lot of women and doesn't really "get" why that doesn't also solve all of Loki's problems.

Just a heartfelt talk between brothers.

they'd find us in a week (ao3) - AMidnightDreary loki/tony M, 7k

Summary: Loki is experienced. He likes to think so, anyway. In the last decades, no lover has managed to surprise him.

Then again, no lover has ever lied to him as much as Tony Stark.

Welcome to the Rainbow (ao3) - itsalltheory M, 1k

Summary: Yelena asks a slightly too tipsy Kate questions about sexuality.

A little fluff, a little humour, a little angst. A lot of friendship and support.

we're not broken (ao3) - theforestwithin G, 1k

Summary: After Yelena's failed date, she and Bucky talk.

when it happens (ao3) - starkskypines loki/tony T, 4k

Summary: Loki’s hand reaches into the minuscule space between them and hesitates. Tony feels an urge to lean forward so Loki's hand can complete its journey to Tony’s waist because nothing sounds better to him than Loki’s hands on him.

“Can I kiss you?”

Tony nods before the question is fully out of Loki’s mouth, and he’s moving forward. Loki’s mouth crashes against his, warm and gentle, yet full of something chaotic and untamed.

or Avenger!Loki gets hurt and Tony realizes that he might be in love with Loki. He doesn't do anything about it but Loki does. Misunderstandings occur but they talk it out in the end

[mega-ringsandthings-world]

Ahh! Well that be glad for I also love talking about this au! And I have some many questions!

So Mihawk activates armament on their way out? Any chance, since he doesn’t know how armament works, he uses it in such a way that it’s like, well shit, I don’t know enough about armament to say that can't work, and then he does something fucking crazy with it? Like how Sanji lights himself on fire or Zoro creates several other body parts? Like it’s an extension of your will—why should it be limited when your ambition isn’t?

Thoughts on tattoos? The boys could get them to cover up scars or other forced tattoos or brands. Also, will Mihawk dress less exposed in this AU? Maybe in the beginning of their escape, slightly ashamed of his scars, a bit self-conscious or at people looking at his body, developed body dysphoria from all the torture--the scars could trigger memories maybe? Maybe as they heal more slowly, he starts to stop covering up as much as he does? I don't know. Shanks would be just as much of a disaster when it comes to clothes as his older counterpart, and you know, for those first few years of freedom and being able to wear whatever they want, they'd either A. Freak out over all the choices now that they have them. Or B. Wear some of the most outlandish stuff, which from One Piece probably makes everyone shrug and go, "Yeah, they can slaughter a whole Marine base without breaking a sweat; we don’t give a shit what they wear." I still want to write/draw Shanks clothes covered in Mihawks embroidery projects though.

Oh yeah, wanna bet about how absolutely terrifying and confusing freedom is for them once they get out? For two years, they had a routine, had their life structured, and even if it was horrible, it was a predictable type of horrible. Do you think they sometimes lie awake at night wishing they could go back and then hating themselves for thinking it? And are absolutely confused with stuff like shopping and human interaction that’s beyond fighting, faked complacency, and/or trauma-bound?

Do they freak out grocery shopping and walking in a crowd? Does Mihawk forget how to act human, and all the refined intricacies that are no longer muscle memory? Does Shanks refuse to talk to anybody who isn’t Mihawk for a good long while? Like if he talked to anyone else, it was probably interrogation or something worse? Are they confused by normal everyday things that they used to understand, but now it just doesn't make sense? Do they do things in public or around people that were fine when captured but are completely faux pas or uncomfortable to see in public?

Anyway, healing sucks, and learning to rejoin society and not try to kill everyone who so much as looks at you wrong will probably take a long time for them, like a soldier rejoining from the army or an inmate getting out of prison. And I've read and watched a lot of interviews from soldiers and former prisoners, and one of the things you can spot after you get out is another prisoner or soldier. Do you think the Loguetown kidnapped can just spot each other across a crowded room? Can they just look and go, "Yeah, them. I know that general vibe?"

Are their conversations then from their perspective reminiscing while everyone else is like, "Uhh, that's torture, you all were tortured? And your wistfully looking off into the sunset thinking about it?”

Like a conversation can go— "And man, food, Oda Christ! When we first got out and I had a peach again, I thought I'd fucking die, man. But then, sometimes, it's like the food is too much? You know what I mean? Like too much flavor and color and choices and health and shit? Like, we can't just eat chocolate all the time, and while gruel was disgusting, it at least kept us in top shape, ya know?"

"Oh my god, man, I totally get it. Sometimes I'll just be sitting, wondering why I'm hungry, and then remember, 'Oh yeah, I actually have to make my food now,' and like, food is just so much, man. I miss the gruel sometimes." And everyone, like staring at them, talking about getting their teeth pulled out like it was the good old times and not deeply horrifying.

Keep 'em coming, lol! Both Mihawk and Shanks discover their full haki while escaping/shortly after escaping. There's some amount of discourse on this, but I'm planning for Mihawk to use his Armament haki to turn Yoru black. Or more black. Haki (and armament haki's black color )wasn't a thing yet when Yoru was shown to be black, so Yoru is technically a black blade with no influence of haki, but shhhh, I do what I want. We also know Yoru is one of the twelve supreme grade blades, among which Roger's blade, Ace, is one of, so a big thing is that Mihawk takes Yoru from the marines, because Marines had rounded up as many of the twelve blades as they could. As far as doing improbable feats with Armament Haki, Mihawk does, because at that point, he's desperate enough to. And so does Shanks with his. And while we're peaking of tattoos...armament-black imprints from Mihawk grabbing Shanks to protect him, anyone? (Yes, I know that's not how it works. I can get a pass here.) Tattoos are always a draw. What they'd actually be of is really interesting to think about. I think they'd dress as close as possible to the way they did before their capture, because it's a way of maintaining control/grasping at their former selves. But of course, there will be be the aspect of a security blanket, so while the style remains the same, their clothes become armor. (Mihawk does wear high-collared vampire shirts for quite a while, though. And he won't be found without his coat.) They'll be more structured and ornate, meant to project status and stop people dead in their tracks. i.e Mihawk gets his hat, his coats are fully embroidered and embossed/beaded and have gold hardwear, he wears gold jewellery. Shanks takes to wearing long heavy leather cloaks he can wrap himself fully in, flowing red silk sashes. Silk shirts too. Real shoes. Mihawk embroiders everything of his. All those patterns canon Shanks wears? Loguetown Shanks wears Mihawk's patterns. Dripping bloody red flowers and gold filigree everywhere. Oh, it would be. During the times when they are fighting/unable to be around each other because of their recovery, they would think that. Too, they both secretly expected the other to be the one who would survive. They'd never thought it probable that they'd both be free again. And now they are, and they are dealing with it, and they can't. pt.2 coming up