#and then it was the worst movie ive seen this year

[calkale]

As someone who relatively enjoyed MI7 (bc I go no thoughts mode and just watch Tom run around), im sooo curious about your thoughts

im putting this under the cut cause I need to rant about it again and its gonna be LONG, thank you for asking tho

a lot of this is gonna be a repeat of what I said when I watched the movie (I have not seen it since it was in theatres), idk where those posts are but they should be under #mi7 spoilers if you wanna find them.

okay first off im not gonna talk about the overall plot, I couldn't care less about it and I knew that going into the movie. its the stunts and the overall feel of that movie that piss me off. I watch mi movies because I wanna have a good time and watch tom cruise do cool stuff and thats not what I got out of this movie.

im starting with the cliff jump stunt cause I was just thinking about it. the buildup was Ass with a capital A. they cut away from ethan riding up the mountain too many times and for too long at a time. I was comparing it to the scene when ethans chasing walker in fallout because to me that was cut perfectly. Cutting from ethan to benji and sometimes walker for a few seconds so I knew where ethan was and where he was trying to get to but I still felt the build up, I knew he was gonna catch walker but I was still thinking "omg is he gonna make it?". and the cuts to benji and luthor worked well because they were still a part of what was going on and the map on benjis ipad helped visualize what was going on. in mi7 when Ethans riding up the mountain the cuts between him and benji where really good but I hate that they kept cutting back to the train. They could've easily had more obstacles for ethan on the way up the mountain if they needed! its a long ride but showing the mountain and a few shots of Ethan at different parts would've been good enough, we could've had Benji asking him "are you there yet?" like every minute so we get that a lot of time is passing but not enough that the tension stops building and a funny little joke between the two of them. I understand why it cuts back to grace/alanna on the train during that time but those are two very different things going on that are building tension in very different ways. call me crazy but ethan jumping off a cliff is different than grace dressed as someone she's not sitting down to talk to someone. it was just really hard to get invested in either of the two things going on. then the actual jumping off the cliff was such a letdown, I did not feel a fucking thing when he jumps off then it cuts away immediately after like that wasn't The Stunt of the movie?? you dont put a stunt like that on posters and post a 20 minute behind the scenes video about it for it to feel like that and show basically none of it!! show ethan flying through the sky!! show him landing on the train!!! I thought he was gonna land on the train but no that gets taken away in favour of a fucking joke when he crashes through the window. yes mi movies are supposed to be funny im fine with that I love that but come on!! let tom cruise land on the train!!! he can still slip and fall on top of the train but let that old man get his enrichment time!!

now for the train. Im sorry but it looked horrendous, the cgi was Not Good and I can't get past it. with other movies I try my best to not care but this is Mission Impossible. I know they did crash a train I love that but all the cgi added in around it and when Ethan and Grace are climbing through the train looks So Bad. it takes away from everything going on because you know its not real. I get it yeah yeah they can't dangle actors from wires while a train is slipping off a cliff but theres gotta be some way to make it look better. like I said about the bike stunt there was no tension there to me and I felt so disconnected from the movie and the characters, I like putting myself in situations and its hard when im like hm thats not real.

the fiat car chase. this was when I was like "fuck, I hate this movie", im sure we all know by now I am not a hayley atwell fan, so what sue me im allowed to not like people. I didn't like this car chase because it was mostly her driving. BABE THIS IS MISSION IMPOSSIBLE IM HERE TO SEE TOM CRUISE DRIVE NOT HER!!! if she was good then whatever but shes not for the bit. I feel like a lot of things that could've been really cool were pushed aside in favour of humour in this movie and I hate it. you can have both!! they literally did it in rogue nation and you're allowed to have callbacks in this movie so you can have a car chase like the one in rogue nation again!!! just let tom drive so it looks cool or even let hayley drive I dont care I just want it to look cool and have the humour stay inside the car. doing bits like this made the movie feel more generic and like they were trying to appeal to, dare I say, mcu fans. i like mission impossible because they get the ratio of humour to action perfect every time, and they're always so good at timing it too but in this movie especially during this chase it did not work for me and I didn't even find it funny if im being honest.

obviously I also have to talk about ilsa and im gonna shit on mcqs writing so apologies. there are two ways to look at this, one shes dead and two shes not dead, both are bad writing IN MY OPINION. if she is dead that was an awful way to send off such a loved character, she was hardly in the movie. im all for more women in movies but she definitely could've replaced grace and I think it would've given her and ethan a much better dynamic. ilsa barely has any lines??? I wouldn't even call her a side character in this movie like my friend didn't even know her name thats how insignificant she was. the sword fight was cool as fuck, rebecca slayed, but she really should've won that fight? maybe if she was outnumbered id be like okay thats a little more likely but it just feels really out of character for me. now if she DIDNT die then im also pissed because fake killing a character twice in the same movie is a little much for me, if it happened at the start of the movie and the end of the movie then okay I can deal with it but she died twice in like the first part of the movie? im sorry to say it but im sure most casual viewers forgot about her by the end of the movie and if they go back for part two and she comes back it's not gonna mean a whole lot to them. and ethans reaction to her death didn't sit right with me, this guy was a theatre kid he can at least somewhat act sad when the girl he loves fake dies and he should be allowed to, for like 5 minutes at least, I know theres a lot of stuff going on but he loved her!! let him cry a little!! and if we're supposed to believe shes dead then ethan not reacting is not helping.

one last thing I wanna add and I know im probably the only one who feels this because I know most people liked the movie, but when you make a part one and part two that release at different times you want people to like part one. it needs to be able to stand well on its own so people want to watch part two and are excited for it. am I gonna watch part two? probably yeah I wanna see that plane stunt but im not excited for it and I really feel like im just gonna be let down in the same ways again. I dont want to go see a movie for the stunts when I know I hated the stunts in the first part and I didn't come out of it caring about the plot or the characters (other than benji <3) so what am I going for? i have no reason to see that movie or be excited for it

I would also like to add I know this is not the movie tom and mcq wanted to put out since the original cut was like what 4 hours? and the movie was extremely over budget because of covid but I can still be mad about the finished product

[mc-tummy-blur]

Didn't expect the year of our Lord 2025 to get into Alan Rickman, but I guess that's how it goes sometimes

The year of getting into an actor that so far I have only seen portray maladjusted men

[dracomort]

just saw Poor Things and no longer think men should be allowed to make movies

[stupidinrainbowsfan87]

the goldfinch movie is fucking terrible, the acting is shit and every important part in the book was taken out yet they pulled random DIRECT quotes from the book?? and you could tell even if you hadn't memorized shit because it sounded like everyone was just reading the book. like, the charecters don't blend together at all its like each part was recorded in a padded room away from the other actors. and finn carried which might be why the movie was shit because all the budget went towards paying him

[doradotcom]

promising young woman is for the girls who read bunny by mona awad and somehow thought it was good

[preciouslittletoonette]

I feel like Rescue Rangers movie would have been infinitely better had they used Chanticleer the Rooster from the scrapped Disney movie of the same name. Since Chanticleer seemed to be unlikeable in every draft, it would make more sense for him to be the villain. On a different and brighter note, I think Jack from Laugh O Grams would be besties with Peter Pan, given they are really similar. Jack is more of a day-dreamer though [especially in the short Jack The Giant Killer].

I disagree purely on the reason that I have A LOT of problems with this film beyond the Peter Pan situation. Like Peter's situation is just the tip of the big three icebergs of problems I got with this waste of a film- this INSULT to the beauty that is Who framed Roger Rabbit.

Like even taking Peter away, while it might fix the film for a lot of people, especially Peter Pan fans. But for me? It's not gonna work still. Because I'm not only a Peter Pan fan, I'm a Toon Fan.

And this movie did ALL TOONS FUCKING DIRTY. ALL OF 'EM.

The only way for this film to get infinitely better is to scrap the entire thing and start it from over- brand new concept, new script, new crew. Because no matter who you replace with who, someone is getting character assassinated or are not being utilised to their fullest potential, and the lore will still be dogshit that won't make sense.

Sorry for the rant.

Back to Peter, I'm willing to bet Peter is just friends with all the Disney toon kids. Especially if they're from his era. He's a friendly lil bugger like that

[chappell-roans]

i will add, i always say this: let women make mediocre movies!!! men do it all the time and get a million chances (and dollars). equality!!!

[arosebyan0thername]

Preparing to watch a lifetime christmas romance movie in march purely because I wanna see how well they executed a cheesy romance with a wheelchair user

[lacomandante]

I'm going to see Napoleon today, wish me fucking luck

[thecherrygod]

man knowing that there are parents out there controlling what their kids watch and read is. wild to me. like as soon as i was able to read subtitles i was sitting in the living room with my family watching whatever the fuck my parents wanted to watch. the first tv series i watched was sopranos i think, to the point its been long enough that i dont remember a lot of it. like. i feel im at the opposite side of the spectrum there

[evilmosquito47893]

If Poor Things has 0 haters I AM DEAD

[genericpuff]

Ive read a few of your LO esaays (all of which are really well written!) But I was wondering something.

Many people talk about how Rachel loves the story Lolita, and has talked about it before, but nobody has ever shown screenshots. I was wondering if you had any or knew where to find any. This is just being curious, not doubting your statements

Ah so I actually responded to a comment just like this a while back on reddit with all the receipts (it was particularly someone who was claiming it was all "made up" because like you, they couldn't seem to get any proof of it, which is totally valid) so I just had to go and dig those back up haha

DISCLAIMER: I want to make it clear that a lot of people tend to run amok with these suspicious pieces of evidence towards Rachel either "thinking Lolita was a romance" or being a pedophile. I want to make it clear that I do not think any of this is proof towards either of these claims. I do not think that she blatantly thinks Lolita is a romance, or that she was trying to perpetuate pedophilia in any sort of way, just that she may have wanted to have her cake and eat it too by acknowledging the age gap but embracing it anyways as she does throughout LO. I think, at best, she's a terrible writer who's still using the things she liked when she was a teenager / young adult as inspiration without actually going back and re-analyzing those things with an updated 38-year-old viewpoint (as she does this with a lot of things, not just Lolita). Claiming that the following receipts is 'proof' of Rachel being some kind of sex pest / pedophile is at best not constructive at all for the real discussions to be had concerning LO's subtext, and at worst, a serious claim that can ruin someone's life if thrown around without cause. Let's please be responsible and level-headed in how we approach this topic.

Old MySpace + DeviantArt bios with her interests listed:

Her old art site where she labels herself as a "lolita vamp" artist:

Her intro post from a lolita-themed forum she ran:

She does express that it's not THAT kind of lolita, which I'd like to think she never intended in the first place, but it's really telling that LO still manages to be that kind of lolita in a lot of ways, to the point that there are many scenes in LO that feel a little too similar to scenes from the 1990's Jeremy Irons adaptation, such as seen here.

(the above image are song lyrics written about the book, Lolita)

Also despite Rachel saying it wasn't "that kind" of lolita, she still made it clear back in the 2017/2018 run of the comic on Tumblr that Hades is, indeed, a "grown ass man", and that Persephone is a teenager.

And of course the proof is in the pudding, the comic itself is well aware of Persephone's age:

(either Rachel has been using Apollo as a mouthpiece for criticism for years, or she seriously thought this was supposed to make Hades look like the better partner for Persephone because "look at how mean Apollo is" when... he's deadass spitting facts LOL)

As I mentioned in my disclaimer, I don't think Rachel herself is in any way a sex pest or a pedo or whatever you might jump to assuming. Rachel has a history of being inspired by things she watched when she was a child without ever actually going back to re-analyze it or ask herself if what she read was credible or real-

(this isn't the only proof there is of her behaving this way, there's also the fact that she was clearly a huge Disney fan as a child but never asked herself why those movies worked as a piece of written media).

So again, I think at best she's just sort of dated herself by not going to the effort of researching the things she was into when she was a child, she tends to just throw things in that she likes haphazardly without a single thought as to why they worked in the first place or whether or not they would work in LO. Though this is a bit of a saltier opinion, I think when it comes to the Lolita thing specifically, I have a feeling she never actually read the book, just sorta did that thing where she watched the movie adaptation from the 90's and assumed that counted as reading the book and so she put it down as her favorite book / Nabokov as her favorite writer.

But none of that speculation really makes much difference because the evidence is 20+ years old. What does matter is that despite her tastes being what they were 20+ years ago, they're still present in LO and it's not even subtle, there are so many times Rachel has outright said both within the comic and outside of it that Hades is a "grown ass man" and Persephone is a literal teenager. Her fans, of course, will still go to the effort of explaining it on her behalf ("they're gods! ageing isn't a thing for them!" "how old you are doesn't matter when you can be immortal!" "well she probably doesn't mean LITERALLY 19, just like, the god version of it..."), but you can't deny what's coming from the horse's mouth - Hades and Persephone are in a relationship based on an intentionally massive age gap. Regardless of what completely speculative parallels we can draw between H x P and that of Lolita's Humbert Humbert and Dolores using 20 year old MySpace bios as evidence, Hades and Persephone having a massive and intentional age gap is undeniable fact made canon by the creator herself, no matter how you try and slice it.

[m0st-forg3ttable-g1rl]

❝𝐚 𝐋𝐚𝐦𝐛 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫❞

𝐁𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘'𝐀𝐋𝐋!! 𝐈 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝟏𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞, 𝐬𝟑𝐥𝐟 𝐡@rm, 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐯𝟑𝐫𝐝𝟎𝐬𝐞. 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐤.

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬!! 𝐈 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 (𝟑+ 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬)

the lamb siblings sat outside their musty trailer, they could smell the weed from the surrounding houses... if you could even call them that. Penny was convinced the two had a constant second hand high from how much their little "safe haven" smoked that shit.

This was their normal ever since they were small, sitting with each other while their parents couldn't care less, penny, being the elder of the two felt the responsibility to protect her brother, Ezra, from the cult they lived in, however he was a clever kid and eventually caught on in his preteen years.

"do you think we'll get out of here, ez?" penny asked gently, looking over at her little brother, dressed in his usual cape, he insisted he looked cool.

"no. no we won't, no one has" Ezra put simply, that was one thing him and penny never saw eye to eye on; sugar coating things. he always said it how he saw it.

"you.. don't think we even have a chance?" her question was met with the boy simply shaking his head.

She sighed deeply, feeling herself starting to tear up, god she hated this place, she hated her parents, more importantly? she hated herself. Times like this she thought back to her countless nights alone in her room, bloody toilet paper, a razor in her hand and her cheeks tear stained as she felt the sting in her thighs. that's how she kept herself grounded; pain. The only thing keeping her alive was her brother, she cannot leave him alone in this hellhole, he's her whole life, he's the only one who loves her.

Her flashback was interrupted as their parents called the pair inside, the two exchanged worried looks before heading into their trailer, this thing didn't even deserve to be called a home. Once inside they we're met with a harsh grab on their wrists and dragged to the kitchen, Penny's worst fear had become reality, and her brother would have to bear witness.

"mind explaining this? hm?" their mother questioned, her glare shifting between the two.

a razor, a bloody fucking razor sat on the counter, penny felt sick, she wanted to run away and die. actually die, no coming back like in movies, no happy ending; she deserved death.

Ezra stared in shock, he'd never seen it before, he was too young to worry about facial hair to shave, he was too afraid to even touch dangerous objects, so he shook his head

"ive never seen that, mom, and- and I doubt penny has! she.. she wouldn't, right penns?" penny remained quiet "penns..? why is it bloody?" he asked again shakily, connecting the dots. Their parents watched emotionless, penny finally spoke up

"how.. did you find that?"

"oh honey, please, we looked through your room once you developed a little limp and found your friend here. Tell your brother what you've been doing, or should i?"

"tell me what? penny why have you been limping? what does,.. that... have to do with it? you said no secrets between us!" her younger brother quickly became defensive, he knew the answer, he knew the answer to it all, he wished he didn't but... He wasn't dumb.

"Ezra, please, I'll explain it later-"

"no! I want- I want to know now! how are you so calm?!" tears began to form in both of the children's eyes.

Ezra was crying over his beloved sister hiding secrets, penny crying because her brother hated her now.

"ever... ever since we were young, I began to cope in this place with... that" she gestured to the object "the pain would distract me, would get my mind off of how doomed we were to die here, I'm not calm, i am beyond scared right now" penny explained, her voice flat, it was scary, she was never like this. this all but scared her brother more, he was the monotone one, it seemed they had switched places.

With that he walked silently to his room, their mother turned to penny, holding the razor out for her to take

"I see you'll be needing this again, now that the only person who would remotely like you is gone, all because you can't handle your emotions..."

penny took the blade, going up to her own room and breaking down as soon as the door was closed.

Her mother was right, about everything, grabbing the stash of first aid in her dresser she hitched up her skirt and began to "cope"... she couldn't even call it that, it wasn't coping, she was dying, she wanted too, now that Ezra was gone what was stopping her? she continued this cycle of thinking, of slashing and hacking at her skin, for what seemed like hours but was only 2 minutes. The girl sat there, staring at the mess she made, her skirt was blood stained, her thigh was sticky and her nostrils were intruded with the smell of sickly sweet metal. she wanted to vomit, she wanted to vomit until she couldn't any longer.

After her self pitying, penny finally stood up, limping to the bathroom in order to clean up, this was her nightly routine it seemed. Wrapping her leg in gauze, she heard a knock on the door;

"Penns...? I know it's you" her heart hurt. She couldn't turn her brother away, she opened the door to let him in.

Ezra nearly screamed at the sight, his sister was blood stained and sickly pale, he sat next to her on the ground, grabbing an alcohol pad to wipe her hands. A small gesture but he needed to be there for her

"I didn't want you to see me like this, I look pathetic" penny laughed, finishing bandaging her leg, letting her brother care for her

"I didn't want to see you like this either, at least I know you're alive" he reassured, throwing the wipes away and just sitting near her. the two sat like this for a while until penny spoke up

"when... I leave, will you be okay-"

"no. no I won't. which is why you can't leave, in any way." he knew what she meant by leaving. he wasn't dumb.

"right but... if I did?"

"I'd go with you, I don't exist without you"

penny just nodded, pushing herself up to exit the bathroom in silence

"I'm okay, ez, I'm going to bed, you should too" he agreed with her, hugging her tight as he headed to his room.

Once she knew he was asleep, she rushed to the kitchen, searching the pill cabinet for Ezra's Ritalin, with shaky hands she poured a handful, pouring a cup of water with her free hand.

She walked up to her room, waiting for the pills to kick in, she laid down in bed, feeling at peace for the first time in her life, she was finally leaving Elysium. her peace didn't last long as her body soon became clammy and her breathing was shallow; it was time, and she was okay despite the panic. her mind was racing; was this the right thing? should she call someone? what would ezra-

Ezra. oh god Ezra.

By the time her brother crossed her mind, she felt herself choking on her own blood, she found it beautiful in a way, ghostly pale in a pool of blood.

After a minute of agony... penny lamb was dead. She reached her goal of leaving Elysium.

Ezra awoke the next morning with a sense of dread, something wasn't right in the house. he rushed down to the kitchen, finding his parents but no sister

"where's penny? she's out by now"

"hell if I know, couldn't care less about that slut" his mother huffed, shooing him away like a horsefly, he simply turned and made his way to pennys room, figuring she must've overslept after the long night she had. It was unusual for her to sleep until 10am but he didn't put it past her, slowly he opened her door in case she was indecident.. she was, but not in the way he suspected.

This time he did scream at the sight of his sister, the only thing remotely recognizable about her was the twin French braids she always had, even they had dried blood in them, everything about his dear sister was bloody. his parents rushed to find their son kneeling in front of their daughters body, hysterically sobbing as they watched in shock

"no... no she couldn't have, she can't be serious, penny lamb, wake up!" their mother pleaded, shaking her slightly, her head simply lolled to the side as her mouth spilled with blood, dripping onto the floor, causing her family to back up.

Ezra stayed in her room for days, even after her body had been removed, the room smelled of her, of her perfume, blood, tears, memories... the room was her, it was all he had of her, he barely ate for weeks, just enough to barely live, just enough so his parents, as shitty as they were, would have one of their kids. He needed to stay alive for her, stay alive so she wouldn't have died in vain.

[jackalopc]

Now that ive seen TF, what is it about it that you like so much? (This is an excuse for you to go off about it :) )

Why do I love the movie, Triple Frontier?

I’ve known the answer to this question since I received it, and even before then. But putting it into words is more difficult than I think I anticipated. This is maybe not as eloquently written as it could be, but I think I captured at least the basis. I also have some links to other posts where I talk more in depth about certain subjects I bring up, which I recommend, as most are a little more focused.

I’m a veteran, and I think just hearing that you might think that I just like movies focused on the military in general, or something similar. The truth is though, I don’t. I actually rarely watch and engage in military-related media; or at least media that’s solely focused on it. Most military-focused media is just annoying to be quite honest.

They’re there to kiss ass to the military, like buddy, Uncle Sam isn’t going to fuck you. They also tend to portray veterans in a terribly negative light– it’s not that vets don’t face struggles, we do. But it completely misses the point of how we got there (spoiler: it was the military itself). Also because the average person just doesn’t really understand much about military life, they just let it be a buffet of bullshit, toxic masculinity oozing out of every frame, et cetera. And Gods forbid you see a woman in a military film because they’re always fucking useless and just damsels in distress but in fatigues, or they’re ‘not like other women’.

More often than not they just help to perpetuate nothing but the worst, especially about veterans, to the point where people have absolutely no idea the reality of how vets really are. It distracts from the real problems and just makes life harder for us as a whole.

So needless to say, it’s rarely just a fun experience.

So why do I like Triple Frontier if this is just how [U.S.] military movies are?

Well… because it doesn’t do any of that, really.

I think it’s easy to mistake the characters longing for the military life as just more fanatic patriotism and ass-kissing, if you’ve no experience with the military. One post I’ve reblogged at one point mentions Redfly having drank the military/patriot kool-aid, (i apologize i can’t remember exact phrasing); and I think folks misunderstand whats happened to these men.

They’re institutionalized. And I do mean that very literally, because that’s exactly what the military does to you. Especially the longer you’re in, and all of these men retired or got very close to retirement (save likely for Ben but I still estimate he did at least ten years). Are they fucked up vets? Most of em, yeah. But for once, a movie actually lays it out for what the problems are.

“They take your best twenty-years then spit you out” - Redfly.

When you join the military, you’re given a set of promises in return; such as being taken care of health wise as a veteran, et cetera. But it’s so god awfully difficult to access sometimes; it’s an uphill battle. Not because the VA doesn’t want to help you, they do. But the government is constantly trying to fuck service members over and veterans especially (particularly the political parties who claim to be all about supporting the troops and vets…). The military tries their best to prep you to transition out of the military, but they can only do so much. You can’t just casually dip out of the military, you can’t just casually transition. You’re suddenly in a world one day where you don’t have the safety, security, and structure of the military life; and you’re now faced with the question: What is my purpose now?

I have an off-the-cuff ramble here, that i literally wrote a few hours ago in the TF community, where I talk about how weird feeling it is being both a lover of Triple Frontier while also a vet in our current political climate. It goes into this topic a bit more.

These men are disabled, whether or not they admit it to themselves or not; whether they’re on disability currently or not… You can’t really escape it, not really, not unless you’re super lucky and often it’s more just a matter of time. It may not disable you right away, but it can set you up for it down the road. They’re in debt, there are substance issues (Redfly’s alcoholism, potentially Catfish with coke). Their mental health is a mess, especially Redfly. He’s depressed as shit, and he’s doing his fucking best, but his best… just isn’t enough. For most of them it’s not enough.

Ironhead, based off the movie and script, I think truly fucking went through it. But he dragged himself out. He’s what the others can potentially reach. He's got a calm acceptance of the reality they’re in, that most don’t. I didn’t experience anything nearly so close to what he has, but I definitely get it. I’ve had to fight and claw to get my mental health state to where it is for a decade now and it’s still shit. But dear gods, is it fucking better than what it was.

I love that this movie lets them actually be supportive and affectionate with each other. Ironhead’s line to Benny about him being a good man? In the average military movie, that would have been like The One Big Supportive Line you got the entire time; the one moment of letting down those emotional walls to awkwardly say they’re proud of someone, then immediately back to work.

We don’t get that in Triple Frontier. We see men, who despite struggling inwardly and outwardly; genuinely care for and love each other. They hug, constantly, despite seeing each other on a regular basis (with the exception of Pope). They support Benny in his fights, and keep up with each others home lives. The Miller’s are clearly the rocks of the group, the solid, stable ones who’ve managed to figure there shit out first. Yeah, it took time, but they got there. If you told me Ironhead was lowkey everyone’s guidance councilor, I’d 100% believe it. Benny is their light in the dark, the one whose got his whole life ahead of him and they want him to do his best and achieve what many of them probably feel like they no longer can.

No one is surprised to hear about Catfish being grounded, because they already knew. They also know about his new baby, and how his wife would rather him not do private work anymore.

Everyone knows Redfly is in rough shape, that he’s struggling the hardest. It’s why Ironhead wants him on the team, because he knows he’s struggling to not just provide but because he’s just… lost. Lost in a world that doesn’t understand people like them, lost in a world that just isn’t made to handle his skill set outside of the military or a PMC, lost in a world that he spent twenty years of his life fighting for and now it won’t even fight for him. They all did.

We see men who, in the average military movie, this would never happen. They’d all be Too Proud or Too Manly or Too [Insert Bullshit]. I actually talk about it here in more detail, in response to a gifset showing all the hugs. but like these are full body hugs, they’re tight and linger and they hold each other when needed. These men aren’t afraid to show their care for one another… It’s beautiful. Often the only people who have veterans backs are.. well, other vets. Even if you don’t know them. There are a multitude of reasons as to why they all stayed in Tampa, I'm sure, but I’d bet good money that part of is just knowing they had each other there and support each other (even if unconsciously).

None of the men push the others into doing it, save for Pope who obviously just needs a team so of course he would. Which isn't to say he's necessarily the bad guy for it, just more an observation (I talk about it more, later). They all know they all have good reason to say yes, and just as good reasons to say no. They also know that if they do this, they'd want to do it with each other and it's probably a main point for all of them. They rely on each other and know that, even outside of their military service, they each have their backs. They use each other as gauges and read each others feelings on the matter. They're all very in-sync with one another.

This movie really captures the complicated relationship most veterans have with the military. I would know, I’m one of them. It’s complicated and messy, and there is no good answer to any of it. It sounds cliche, ‘it’s complicated’ like its some fucking social media relationship status. But it’s true, and it’s probably the simplest way to explain it…

I have another post, here, where I go back and forth a bit with my friend reggie where we talk about why we believe the fandom is so weird about Redfly. I highly recommend it, Reggie alone has some amazing insights. ( @reggiesfilthylittlesecret ) But it gets into the crux of the matter which is ultimately: these men are desperate. They’re desperate for a life that feels familiar: where they’re respected and their work is appreciated; where they don’t have to struggle to just pay a bill or put food on the table; or worry about if they can put gas in the car. They want to feel like they don’t feel the need to reach for a beer or whatever their vice of choice is anymore, or that they have to sacrifice their morals, all just to feel any ounce of normal. They want to not be disabled, their bodies and minds broken in unfixable ways where the best you can do is just try to take the edge off.

And the thing is, even without the military aspect, so many of us are in this position here in the U.S. why are we acting like we wouldn’t also lose our shit if we could be walking away with literal millions?

I’m not so proud a person to sit here and say I wouldn’t as if it’s a hard fact.

People don’t like seeing things that reflect the worst in themselves, or the even the potential for it. I sometimes think that's where a lot of the skewed view on the movie can come from (among other things). And Pope? He came in offering a glimmer of hope in the darkness. The hope wasn’t false either, had things just gone a little differently, it would have been exactly what they had been sold by him.

And man, I get it. I’m nothing if not plagued by hope, to the point where it wears on me like despair is capable of. It’s exhausting, sometimes; because you have moments where you doubt yourself. You have moments where you wonder if what you’re feeling really is hope, or if it’s worth it. And I’m so so often the only one around in my various friend groups that has even a glimmer of hope let alone more– it’s exhausting, sometimes, carrying it for so many people. But fuck man, someone’s gotta…

This movie is by no means perfect, and I definitely have my criticisms for it. But at the end of the day, I can’t not see… me, in them. I can’t not see my family members, my friends, hell my ex-husband, and the people who’ve helped me the most in my life since getting out in ‘14 when I was a fucking mess and newly disabled.

I see not greedy men, but desperate men. Men who just need something to tell them that it was all worth it– that they didn’t give up their lives, bodies, and minds for nothing. People who just want to feel normal again.

[juniemunie]

SO, MY HIGH QUALITY HTTYD MOVIE ANALYSIS IS HERE

so as ive said before in old posts, i have been watching httyd over and over religiously for so long to the point ive memorized all the lines right

u see the quality of that movie on my old childhood laptop was not perfect. suitable for a simple viewing yes, but not analysis

i never thought about it until a couple of days ago, where i had the opportunity to... acquire... a really high quality version of the movie

took me nearly a whole day to get it to download but i got it and watched it last night

....and wow. it really felt like i got my glasses again and i noticed so many more things. and there were a lot of cool characterizations and animations i missed

if ur interested in listening to me ramble, feel free kdfsgjsl

Literally just a few seconds in and im surprised by how beautiful the night sky is (THERE WERE NEBULAE???) i knew toothless was there but it caught me off guard how pretty and numerous the stars were

SO FIRST SCENE THE RAID

being able to visibly see with such detail that i could see the hair strands of the vikings was wowie, and STOICK'S WRINKLESSS

BUT THE ONE I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT WAS WHEN HICCUP WAS SHOOTING DOWN TOOTHLESS

I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SEE HIS SILHOUETTE BLOCKING OUT THE STARS HERE THATS SO DAMN COOL

the thing i noticed the most in this viewing is Stoick's microexpressions, he has A LOT that i missed simply because the quality wasn't high enough for me to spot them because typically hes not the focus of the camera

for example, here when Gobber and Stoick talk

he makes gestures (when he says his father told him to bang his head he lightly hits the pillar to emphasize it) as well as moves his hands almost very similarly to Hiccup and thats so endearing (Gobber seeing all the similarities but still has to mediate between the two of em HAHAAHAH)

HIS EYES....

His spots are super visible in this version too its such a treat to see everytime Toothless is there

also this composition! I just noticed how nicely placed the stairs are, it gives a natural divide between the two of them

this one here, he has a split second microexpression where he's thinking about what to say next, i think he realized he has to at least encourage him, not scold him

he's less confident as he walks out too, its blurry but he keeps shifting his eyes back to hiccup. if he isn't asserting authority on hiccup they're just both awkward around each other kjfdbglskk

my favorite thing about the dragons are their eyes, toothless' eyes does a wonderful job conveying his emotions even if its just to dilate when he's happy or narrow when he's assessing or feels in danger, its one of the traits i rlly loved watching in the first

look how he mimics the way humans are sitting ksdjfbglsdk

the series of exchanges these to have rlly is just them expressing civility that they think the other would approve of, (Hiccup spares him, Toothless spares him in return. Hiccup merely observes, he observes back. Hiccup drops his weapons, Toothless drops his guard. Hiccup gives him fish, Toothless having not much to offer, decides to share it with him.) It shows how Toothless is quite considerate and honorable.

and i like how in the first movie when he's aggressive he shows off his teeth and especially his gums more. i dont think i see his gums as prominently in the,,, sequels which is a shame because the light colors of his mouth contrasts super well with his dark scales

I CAN SEE HIS FACIAL MUSCLES MOVE HERE WOW. (its like he's really taking in the touch of hiccup's hand here, anticipating smth bad but nothing happening)

oh the way hiccup's face falls when stoick says "all those years of the worst viking berk has ever seen!

stoick isnt good with emotional talking, but this is the most open and we've seen him with hiccup so far

he's a hard ass, but the moment he finds that hiccup has done something great, he goes to him because he thinks he finally has a thread, something in common that they COULD BOND WITH

he literally goes "we finally have something to talk about" HE JUST WANTS A FATHER-SON BOND IM GONNA CRY

and you can see how toothless processes in a millisecond that astrid hurt hiccup

typically the "steed" falls head over heels for the male's love interest, which is why i rlly do like how toothless doesnt like astrid at all when he firsts meet him

HE RLLY DOESNT LIKE HER AT ALL HAHAHA

also take note how the first thing Hookfang does is to attempt to climb or get out, and when he cant, addresses the only one in the ring. im pretty sure he's intelligent enough to know the situation (ive been planning a fic of his perspective of the movie honestly)

OH THE WAY HES DRAGGED BACK TO HIS CAGE OH IM SO SORRY

this scene. i have no other words. it is vital to me that this split second expression existed. he rlly processed what he just said here to his own son

THIS MICROEXPRESSION I COMPLETELY MISSED

I never knew how uncertain his expression looked as he looked away from Hiccup, like he was hesitating, but then the anger comes back and his fists clench

AND OH MAN TOOTHLESS' EXPRESSION!!! I DID NOT MEAN TO CATCH THAT BUT IM SO GLAD I DID

and no thats not him noticing stoick, after the expression in the previous pic, he blinks, and THEN he notices stoick nearing and glaring at him, which he returns back

ITS LIKE TOOTHLESS IS HAVING HIS OWN INTERNAL THOUGHTS AT THAT MOMENT AND THATS SO?????

THEY TREAT TOOTHLESS LIKE A THINKING FEELING CHARACTER, AND ITS PERFECTION

final one, i love his expression here, he usually lifts his lips when he's angry, scared or ticked off but in this context its obvious he still doesn't like stoick, but he saved him and hiccup. so its only right to toothless that he returns the favor.

AND THATS ALL IVE GOT FOR NOW THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO ME RAMBLE HAHAHA

[humanpurposes]

My Heart Belongs to Daddy, part iv, modern!Aemond

Series Masterlist // Main Masterlist // For fear that you'll find out, how I'm imagining you

modern!Aemond x step-daughter

Warnings: 18+, smut, cursed dinner party, toxic family dynamics, Targaryen men being the worst

Words: 5700

A/n: Also available to read on AO3. And I made a Series Playlist :)

Over the last two months, finishing her thesis, taking exams, sending off masters applications and keeping track of a boyfriend has left little room in her mind for Aemond Targaryen.

For the last month or so she’s hardly even seen him. On the weekdays she gets up early and spends all day in the library. On the weekends she goes to Cregan’s place in central. He goes to the gym with Jace on Saturday morning and on Sundays he usually has a rugby match. Between that they watch movies in his room, go for drinks with his friends and sometimes she drags him around her favourite museums. 

The sex is good. For a bulky guy with a nose piercing and sleeve tattoos of wolves and weirwood trees, Cregan is surprisingly gentle. He makes her cum on his tongue, then he leans over to fuck her with his hands pressed into the mattress, looking between her eyes and the space where their bodies meet. He doesn’t say much, a few strained “oh Gods” and a grunted “fuck” when he comes. When they’re done he falls into the bed beside her, throwing an arm around her while he rambles about whatever happens to be on his mind, exams, internships, summer plans…

She’s happy to rest her head against him, listening to the humming of his chest as he speaks, letting it lull her as she slips into her own mind. Sometimes she still feels a little empty when it’s over and doesn’t have the energy to go for another round. She puts it down to stress. Or hormones. Or something. 

Now, being on the other side of everything she realises time is passing too quickly for her liking. 

Joan Jett blasts through the car speakers while Alys and Cregan go on about the season finale of some drama series she’s not kept up with.

Alys loves Cregan. Everyone loves Cregan because he’s a people person. He speaks to everyone he meets like they’re already lifelong friends and he has a remarkable talent for finding common interests. If she were cynical she would say he’s palatable.

The weather has been perfect so far, bright and sunny but with enough of a breeze that the heat isn’t unbearable. Ideal for the graduation ceremony.

She looks through the recent photos in her phone. She took a few nice ones of the Sept, the nave lined with columns and towering statues of the Seven watching over the cohort of students in red and black robes. She keeps swiping through photos of her and some of her classmates on the front steps tossing their hats in the air, a few of her and Joanna, one of her and Cregan, and one of her and Alys. 

Sometimes she thinks she looks nothing like her mother, but when they smile they look strikingly similar.

Everything had paid off in the end, the study dates with Joanna, the all-nighters, the last minute breakdowns crying over the kitchen counter with Alys. But she’s proud that she did it all on her own. Especially given how helpful Aemond had been last year. Just thinking about it makes her heart sink.

He’d been living with them for a few months by then. They were comfortable with each other, existing in the same spaces, eating dinner and watching movies together when Alys was out or working late. 

Sometimes he’d put his arm around the back of the sofa, letting her lean into him while they watched 90s thrillers, leaning into her every so often to make a joke or a profound observation. They could analyse movies forever, staying up late until their eyes were tired, leaning in closer and closer and never really realising it.

And then when exams came around, the stress just got to her. “It’s half the suffering,” Alys insisted, “you’re not doing yourself any favours, so don’t do it.” Easier said than done. 

There was one particular module on Conflicts in the Modern Era that was chipping away at her sanity. It was her last exam of the year and every time she went over her notes she just felt hopeless.

Aemond offered to help her study. He had loads of notes and old assignments on his laptop from his undergrad and his masters. They spent hours in the dining room, going over readings and practice questions.

He would sit next to her, leaning over every so often to read through what she was working on. Every hand on her shoulder, every reassuring “hmm,” or utterance of “good girl,” when she got something right sent shivers down her spine.

She knew it was wrong, but she didn’t exactly want it to stop.

The exam ended up going a lot better than she anticipated. She opened the paper and instantly saw that, by some miracle, there were a few questions similar to the ones she had done with Aemond.

She came home ecstatic. Alys was at work but Aemond was home, loitering in the kitchen. She practically leapt into his arms when she saw him, telling him every detail she could think of with a huge smile on her face.

Aemond’s hands settled on her waist. He leaned into her until all she could see were his bright, blue eyes. “I’m so proud of you baby,” he said in a voice that made her breathless.

He leaned in further until his lips were on hers, soft and warm, kissing her tentatively. She thought it might be over quickly, until she reached up, teasing her fingertips over the nape of his neck while his grip on her waist tightened, pulling her closer, kissing her deeper.

When they pulled away, both a little breathless, he rested his forehead against her and smiled. She smiled back.

But she snaps out of that trance when she realises they’re pulling into the driveway.

She looks across at Alys for a moment, laughing at something Cregan just said.

Her chest feels like it might crush under the weight of it all, but time presses on and things seem to be moving forward for the better. She’s happy with Cregan. Who wouldn’t be? He’s funny, smart, maybe a little over confident at times but she can forgive that. And she’s got the whole summer before she starts her masters. With Cregan in the picture she figured she might as well stay at KLU. He’s been trying to convince her to move in the flat with him. There’s no reason not to, it’s close to campus, his flatmates are nice and they seem to keep the place clean. She keeps saying she’ll think about it.

He reaches for her hand as Alys leads them through the front door.

The house looks immaculate and it fills her with dread. 

Alys has decided to use her graduation as an opportunity to host a family dinner. Maybe she’s intending it to be a grand offering of peace, maybe she just wants to show off, or maybe she’s just lost her mind because putting two halves of a warring family in the same room seems like a disaster waiting to happen. Not to mention she’ll have to introduce everyone to Cregan. 

The dreamy rhythm of a Mazzy Star song drifts from the kitchen. Aemond is leaning over the counter, in a black shirt with his sleeves rolled up, prepping a rack of lamb. She tries not to look at his hands as he takes pinches of salt, pepper and spices between his fingers.

Alys heads straight for the vodka, offering a round of martinis before the dreaded guests arrive.

She and Cregan both decline politely, and when Alys turns to Aemond he purses his lips. “I don’t drink vodka martinis.”

Alys rolls her eyes. “Thinks he’s so sophisticated,” she says to Cregan. 

Cregan chuckles and plants a light kiss to her cheek, muttering about taking a shower and disappears down the hall.

Her eyes meet Aemond’s for a moment. He smiles sincerely. He’s playing one of her favourite songs.

She tells her mother she’s going to get dressed, and feels Aemond’s eyes following her as she heads upstairs.

When she gets to her room she puts her graduation robes on a hanger and lies on the bed in the black slip dress she wore underneath. Something’s pressing awkwardly into her back, Cregan’s jeans and t-shirt. She tosses them across the room and falls back against the mattress, staring at the ceiling and listening to the hum of the shower.

Is it unfair to hate someone for listening to a song? Did he remember it was her favourite or was it a lucky guess? Maybe he was trying to tease her, or else it could have just been a coincidence, but that doesn’t seem like him. Aemond rarely does anything accidentally.

Cregan saunters in with a towel around his hips. He looks down at his clothes on the floor in front of the door. “Not where I left them,” he mutters.

She pretends not to hear him.

He gets dressed quickly, all he has to do is put on his jeans and clean white shirt. 

“How many people are coming tonight?” He asks, spraying some perfume on his pulse points.

She keeps her eyes on the ceiling. “Viserys, Alicent, Rhaenyra, Daemon, Jace, Baela, Aegon and Helaena.” Luke and Rhaena were going to stay home with Joffrey, and Daeron would still be in Sunspear until the end of the month. Just as well, there would already be too many people to keep track of.

“I hear some of the family stuff from Jace,” Cregan says, “sounds like a mess.”

She hums to herself. “Oh, you have no idea.”

She takes her hair out of its low bun and fixes it into a more casual look, leaving it mostly loose but out of her face. Her makeup has managed to survive the day pretty well. She touches up her blush and wipes away her lipstick, applying a sweet tasting cherry lipbalm instead.

When they reappear in the kitchen Alys is nowhere to be found but Aegon and Helaena have already arrived. 

Aegon and Cregan pair up nicely, swigging bottles of beer while Aemond pours out three gin and tonics.

She compliments Helaena’s patterned skirt and red boots. In return she admires her dress. “You two are matching,” she says, as Aemond hands them both their drinks.

He raises his eyebrows and the corners of his mouth are tight. “Happy coincidence.”

“Black’s not exactly a fashion statement,” she adds, taking a sip. 

Aemond hums in agreement.

She takes a breath to relieve the tension in her shoulders. “How are you doing?” She asks Helaena, “didn’t get much of a chance to talk to you at the wedding.”

Helaena’s doing a PhD in Etymology at Highgarden, between that and her various art projects she seems happy, but something’s off. She’s never exactly been outgoing but she seems particularly timid, wide eyes darting constantly to Aemond and Aegon. She’s nervous, but in all fairness they all are. Or they should be.

While Helaena goes on about species of butterflies, she finds her attention almost completely on Aemond, his hand gripping his glass in the corner of her eye, the sound of his breath, those well timed hums and the smell of his aftershave. She takes another sip of her drink to steady her nerves, hoping neither of them notice her hand trembling as she brings the glass to her lips. 

Eventually Alys waltzes in with Rhaenyra, Daemon, Baela and Jace following behind her. That seems like a good opportunity to escape. She goes to hug Jace and Baela, and follows them when they go to stand with Aegon and Cregan. 

The tension is palpable, Alys having a stiff conversation with Rhaenyra, Daemon lurking at the edge of the room with a glass of whisky, and Jace stealing glances over her shoulder, at Aemond and Helaena.

She catches whispers of their conversation but nothing tangible. 

“What’s your problem?” Baela hisses to Jace. 

He tuts. “He’s staring daggers at me, fuck’s sake.”

Aegon’s lips thin. He excuses himself curtly and joins his siblings by the glass doors to the garden. 

Their little group falls to an uneasy silence. 

“Well done, dickhead,” Baela says, rolling her eyes.

Cregan gives her a confused look. She puts her hand on his shoulder and comes onto her tiptoes to whisper in his ear. “I’ll show you the powerpoint presentation later.”

Somehow the mood only gets colder when Viserys and Alicent walk through the door. It’s almost pitiful, watching Rhaenyra and Daemon trying to win his attention while Alicent keeps her hand on her husband’s shoulder, muttering into his ear whenever she can.

Not speaking to Aemond has meant she’s mostly been out of the loop, but she can guess they’ve not moved past the dispute over Viserys’ will.

Helaena and Aegon both go to greet their parents. It’s cordial at best, light hugs and pecks on the cheek, and Viserys shakes Aegon’s hand like this is the first time they’ve met. Aemond doesn’t go near them.

The lack of warmth is only more noticeable when Viserys greets Jace and Baela with open arms and a pleasant smile. He hugs her too, congratulating her— after all that is why they’re here— and shakes Cregan’s hand firmly.

She catches Aegon’s eye over his father’s shoulder. He frowns, almost comically and goes to find another bottle of beer.

Before long Alys ushers them all into the dining room.

Alys and Viserys sit at the two heads of the table and the others fill in around them. When they see Alicent has taken the seat to Viserys’ right, Rhaenyra and Daemon move to the other end of the table. Helaena sits next to her dad and they both smile vaguely. Aemond, rather diplomatically, takes a central seat between Aegon and Rhaenyra. 

In an attempt to avoid sitting across from either of his uncles, Jace settles next to Alys, and once Cregan sits next to him, the only free seat is directly opposite Aemond. She sits down without a fuss.

Once everyone is a bit more settled, Aemond and Alys go back to the kitchen to bring in small plates of salad and seared tuna.

It starts off with smalltalk. Cregan and Jace are muttering to each other on her left, while Baela and Helaena have a friendly catch up to her right, leaving her to prod at her starter, waiting for an appetite to appear.

She doesn’t dare to look up past the space in front of her plate, or the pair of eyes she can feel burning into her.

Once they’re finished, the plates are whisked away and Aemond presents them with lamb chops, fondant potatoes and summer greens, while Alys pours out glasses of red wine. 

Viserys’ knife scratches against his plate as he carves into the meat. “Really excellent lamb, Alys.”

“Aemond did the food,” she says.

He pauses, looks down at his plate and carries on eating.

She hears Jace whispering something into Cregan’s ear and they both grunt in amusement.

“Something funny?” Aegon asks sharply, reaching for his glass.

She finally looks across the table. Aegon’s face is a dangerous mix of anger and anticipation.

“Just admiring Aemond’s culinary skills,” Jace muses, spearing a cut of lamb on his fork, “didn’t realise he’d gone domestic.”

“Jacaerys,” Rhaenyra hisses.

Aegon huffs but keeps his mouth shut with a stern look from Aemond.

Viserys’ attention suddenly latches onto his grandson. The rest of the table falls quiet while he asks Jace about his exam results. 65 average. Just a few marks off a first.

Aegon nudges his brother but Aemond doesn’t react. 

Their father seems to notice. “Jacaerys is shadowing me for the summer,” he says pointedly. 

Aegon finishes off his glass and immediately refills it.

“Not coming to Dragonstone, then?” Helaena pipes up in a brighter tone, leaning to look at Jace.

The ancestral home of the Targaryen family, a beautiful estate along the coast outside the city. It’s more of a castle than a house really, passed down the generations over centuries. They use it as a holiday home now.

She went with the Strongs one summer. Ten weeks of beach trips, reading by the pool and fresh seafood for dinner every evening. It was the first time she really remembers meeting the Targaryen siblings. Aemond seemed so quiet then, always with his nose in a book. It feels like a lifetime ago now. 

Cregan’s voice in her ear takes her by surprise. “You alright?” He asks, stroking his hand along the silky black fabric on her thigh. “You looked a bit lost there for a moment.”

She can see Aemond looking at her in the corner of her eye. “I’m fine,” she says, pushing Cregan’s hand away.

“We’re just a little busy at the moment,” Rhaenyra says, “work is… hectic.”

Alicent visibly bristles. 

“Might make it down for a few weeks, if the boss lets me off,” Jace says.

“I’m excited to have you,” Viserys says, “good to get him used to the order of things nice and early.”

“Yeah, amazing what you can do when you have everything handed to you on a silver fucking platter,” Aegon says, casually taking a long draw from his glass.

Alicent and Rhaenyra look horrified. Daemon and Viserys are both clenching their fists. 

“He says as if Otto Hightower didn’t have to buy him a place at KLU,” Jace retorts.

Aegon shrugs. “So what if he did? Got the degree, didn’t I?”

“And what have you done with it?” Viserys says in a scathing voice, “bought a flat with my money. Drank and screwed your way through life with no concern for your career or your family.”

Aegon tuts. “The fuck does that mean, family?”

“Leave it,” Aemond mutters and the table settles into an uncomfortable quiet.

“At least Jace has some direction,” Viserys says, breaking the silence. For a moment his eyes dart to his wife.

Alicent’s brown eyes are wide and glassy. “And my children don’t?”

She watches Aemond’s lips flicker into a sneer before he composes himself and goes back to staring vacantly at his untouched glass.

“That’s not what I meant, love–”

Daemon chuckles quietly. “And yet…”

Alicent slams her knife against the table with a jarring clatter. “Maybe they would have amounted to something more if you had shown even the slightest bit of interest in your own children!”

A chair scrapes against the floor and Helaena’s silver hair billows behind her as she leaves the dining room.

Baela grabs her wrist and pulls her to stand. “Excuse us,” she says sweetly. Not that anyone will hear her over the shouting match brewing between Alicent and Daemon.

They find Helaena in the lounge, on the sofa, picking at her nails.

“Hey,” Baela whispers, coming to hold her hands so she stops.

Helaena looks up at them with glistening blue eyes and a trembling lip. It’s the first time she’s really seen the resemblance between her and Alicent.

Raised voices echo from down the hall. By the sounds of things Aegon and Viserys have joined in too.

Helaena releases her hands from Baela’s and presses her palms to her forehead. “I’m sorry,” she says, taking a few shallow gasps. “I just don’t know how much more of this I can take.”

Baela hums in agreement.

Tears start to trickle from her eyes. “I used to love hanging out with you and Jace and everyone. I don’t understand… what did we do wrong?”

She isn’t sure what to do. She feels so helpless just watching Helaena as she starts to cry. Baela sits next to her and puts her arm around her shoulders.

And while the arguing persists, Helaena eventually starts to calm down a little, wiping her tears on her sleeve and leaning into Baela. “We missed dessert,” she sighs.

“We have ice-cream in the freezer,” she says, “strawberry or vanilla?”

And just like that her face lights up. “Both.”

“Noted. Baela?”

Baela smiles sympathetically. “Strawberry please.”

She catches fragments of the insults being thrown around the dining room as she walks past. “Hightower leech”, “spoiled cunt”.

She sees a figure in a black shirt through the frosted glass door to the kitchen. She holds her breath as she opens the door.

Aemond is leaning over the counter, fiddling with a packet of cigarettes. He looks up as soon as he hears the door. She lets it close behind her and leans against it.

He stares at her with a tight jaw, a sad little pout on his lips and a slight scrunch in his nose. Despite everything she can’t help but feel sorry for him. 

She tuts to herself and goes to place two bowls and two spoons on the counter, avoiding Aemond’s gaze.

Not my problem.

She goes towards the freezer and hears Aemond sigh heavily behind her. She hovers her hand over the handle.

Not my problem. Not my problem. Not my problem.

“Is it stupid of me to ask if you’re alright?” She asks, turning to fave him.

One of his wide plams is pressed against the counter, his legs crossed casually at the ankle. “No.” 

“And are you alright?”

His nostrils flare as he takes a slow breath. “I told her this would be a bad idea,” he says, tapping the box against the counter. “But what do I know, it’s only my fucking family.”

The way the light shines on his face makes the scar over his left eye seem like a shadow. She’s never asked about the details of what happened, but then he doesn’t like to talk about it. 

Two months ago she would have held his hand or pulled him into her arms when he was this anxious.

But things have changed now.

“Aemond, I–”

“Babe?”

She whips her head round to see Cregan and Jace standing in the doorway. Guilt twinges in her chest and she doesn’t know why. A conversation is nothing to be ashamed of, surely? She hadn’t even heard the door open. 

“Baela and Helaena are in the lounge, right?” Cregan asks.

“Yeah,” she says, “I’ll be there in a minute.”

They both glare at Aemond before they leave. When she turns to face him, he’s looking back with a cold indifference.

“He seems nice,” Aemond says once they're gone. “Palatable.”

She starts to drag her teeth over her bottom lip but stops herself. Aemond’s eyes are so intense, glaring from across the room with a dangerous look of fury and sadness. That’s exactly how he looked at her, the night of the wedding, when they were in her hotel room. When he asked her about Cregan then she liked how it made him jealous. 

Her blood starts to simmer, a feeling that cuts deeper and hurts more than hate. “Is this it then?” She says.

His brows scrunch into a frown, but his wide eyes seem more bewildered than anything. “What do you mean?”

It’s like a switch clicks in her brain and something in her heart dies. These last few weeks, even with things going so well with Cregan, she’s carried Aemond with her, hoping that one day she’d wake up and things would have worked out differently. It’s what she’s been doing for the last year anyway, she just never managed to break the habit.

It has to end somewhere, the lying, the guilt, and the naivety that she meant something more to him than a pretty face and a convenient fuck. 

She needs to let go and she’s known that for a long time.

“Forget it. You’ve made your side of things clear,” she says, her voice starting to tremble. “This was never going to end well and I should have thought about that before I led myself on.”

She takes a step towards the door but he’s in front of her, keeping her between the freezer and the counter.

“Do you love him?” Aemond mutters, quickly and quietly.

She can feel her heart beating in her throat.

“Do I… what?”

He takes advantage of her hesitation. His hand clamps around her wrist as he moves to the door. It takes a few moments to realise he’s dragging her with him.

The door to the lounge is shut. She hears Cregan’s booming laugh on the other side as Aemond leads her further along the hallway.

And suddenly they’re in the downstairs bathroom. She stands in front of the sink, staring at her own reflection as the lock clicks.

She watches Aemond in the mirror. The room is small and narrow, even when he’s standing by the door he’s close. Then he starts to close the distance between them with slow, taunting steps until he’s standing over her.

She can feel him and smell his aftershave, the bitterness of gin and the sweetness of red wine.

There’s that dark look in his eye again, determined, and hungry.

“Did you really think I’d let you keep up this pathetic little act?” He murmurs, eyes fixed on hers through the glass.

“What act?” 

She lets out a little gasp when he places a hand on her hip and pushes his hips against her, grinding a growing hardness against her so subtly he might not be moving at all.

He leans into her but no part of him makes contact with her skin. She shudders at the heat of his breath running over her ear, neck and shoulders. “I said you were needy, didn’t I?”

Her shoulders flinch when a single fingertip touches the nape of her neck. He draws it gradually along her spine as she desperately resists the urge to cry out at the tingling sensation it brings, arching against him because her body has nowhere else to go.

“And so sensitive,” he says and stops just as he reaches her lower back. “It was all for me, wasn’t it? The crop tops, the staring, even Stark, you just wanted a reaction.”

She’s always been a good liar but when she opens her mouth to reply she finds she just can’t do it. She doesn’t want to, not when he places his hand on her side and traces over the curves of her waist, her hips, the pouch of her stomach and her thighs. It’s been so long since they’ve been this close, and it’s not close enough.

“You stopped wanting me,” she breathes.

“Stupid little slut,” he says, leaning his chin over her shoulder. He starts dragging both hands down her thighs, taking the hem of her dress with him as he moves back up. “How could I ever stop wanting you?” His voice is harsh and hypnotic all at once. Cold and unforgiving. It sets her skin alight and leaves her wanting more.

But it doesn’t make sense. He was the one who left the hotel room. 

“I don’t understand… this isn’t fair.”

“But you and I both know you don’t like to play fair,” he rasps, tracing circles over the tops of her thighs, occasionally brushing over the hem of her panties.“I just know these last couple of months have been fucking unbearable without you.”

She bites down on her lip to stop herself whimpering at his touch.

He groans as his head falls against her neck, hands still pawing at her legs and the dress hitched around her waist. “Let me fuck you,” he utters in that low voice that means it’s taking every ounce of effort to hold himself back. “I know what you need. Just be a good girl and let me fuck you.”

Anticipation floods her body. She can feel her self-control slipping. She can’t think straight, can’t think past him or a world beyond this moment.

She wants it too much to feel guilty, for now at least.

“Please,” she utters.

“Please what?”

“Fuck me.”

Suddenly his soft touches are gone and he yanks her panties down to her knees. One hand slides between her legs, prying them open enough so he can circle her clit with the pads of his fingers. The other snakes up her body and takes a gentle hold of her throat.

He finally brings his lips to her cheek. They graze over her skin as he mutters, “you said something to me, that night. What was it?”

She scoffs. “You’re such a cunt.” She can hear how weak her voice is as she says it.

“Mouth on you, baby,” he coos, “come on, I know you remember.”

She shakes her head fervently, hoping she can focus on the movements of his fingers, the pleasure building and building inside her. 

“I want to hear you say it, baby.”

She lets herself melt against him, clinging desperately on his arms, breathless but defiant as she meets his eyes in the mirror.

With a short huff he withdraws his hand, but keeps her against him by her neck. He easily undoes the buckle on his belt, bringing his trousers down just enough to free his cock.

She bucks her hips on instinct as he slides the tip through her folds, gathering her wetness, and smiling when he realises responsive she is to him.

“Have you always been this restless? Or have you just missed me?”

Her head hangs slightly as he teases between her entrance and her clit. She can feel how thick his cock is, how hard he is and she already knows it’s going to make her feel so fucking good.

The grip on her neck becomes firmer, demanding her attention back to the mirror. He holds her gaze as he slides into her tight, slick cunt.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he says, “look at how well you take that.”

He’s right. The sight of her pleading face and parted lips as he holds her and pushes deeper inside of her only adds to her arousal. 

He fucks her slowly, precisely, placing a hand on her stomach and pressing into her while the impact of his thrusts are muffled by fabric. 

“Can you feel that?” He whispers, “can you feel how tight you are? Can you feel how deep that is?”

“Ah— fuck, yes…” she chokes, savouring the burn and the stretch of his cock as he drags through her walls and hits her sweet spot. When his fingers come back to circle her clit it all becomes so light and perfect and deliciously overwhelming.

“I knew you still wanted me,” he pants between the gentle kisses to her cheek. “Say it.”

“No,” she manages to whimper.

“Say it.”

Her orgasm comes as a sudden burst of warmth and Aemond isn’t far behind, suppressing a grunt as his hips still and his cock throbs inside her.

A few moments pass and he turns her head towards him, keeping his eyes on her lips. He leans in to kiss her and she twists her head to the other side.

“Fucking brat.” 

Suddenly he brings her to face him fully, effortlessly lifting her by her thighs to rest her against the edge of the sink. 

There’s no teasing this time, no pretence, just need. He pushes himself into her in one cruel snap of his hips.

He’s too impatient to give her time to adjust before he starts to fuck her, fiercely and without mercy, hands digging into the flesh of her rear, pulling her in over and over again. He brings his forehead against hers, glaring into her eyes like he hates her.

But like this she can wrap her arms around his neck, hold him even closer and lose herself in just him.

“All you need to remember is you’re mine. You’re fucking mine and you know it.”

Tears well in her eyes and she can only take what he gives her. “Fuck… Aemond...”

Her climax builds until it’s almost excruciating, and then it tears through her, a release unlike anything she’s known for months. She keeps her arms tight around him, burying her face into his neck as her thighs shake and her whole body tenses and trembles.

Aemond doesn’t stop, fucking her through it until she’s writhing with the overstimulation.

“Too much,” she whines, “fuck it’s too much!”

He clasps a hand over her mouth to muffle her protest, dangerously echoing on the tiled walls and floors. He comes again, gnawing at his lip to keep himself quiet and spilling deep inside her as tears stream from her cheeks.

He admires the mess they’ve made as he pulls out, her cream on his cock and his cum leaking from her quivering cunt. His eyes flicker back to her face, his expression softening and his lips curling into a half smile.

Dazed and still desperate she leans into him, but her lips barely get to  graze his before he pulls away.

“Oh now you want to kiss me?”

She frowns, which only seems to amuse him.

By the way he grabs her jaw she doesn’t need to be told what to do. She offers him her tongue and swallows when he spits into her mouth.

A satisfied groan rumbles in his chest and her belly flutters in anticipation, as if he hasn’t just made her come twice, as if she can’t feel his spend starting to drip down her thighs.

He slips her off the sink and kneels down to pull her panties up her legs. Then he fixes her skirt, smoothing down the fabric with his palms.

“You’re going to be civil,” he murmurs, one of his hands coming to fix her hair. “You’re going to go back out there, kiss your boyfriend on the cheek, but I want you to think about me. Think about how good I make you feel. Do you understand?”

She nods.

“Words, baby,” he says as his hand comes to cup her jaw, stroking his thumb over her flushed cheek.

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“That’s my good girl,” he says softly, leaning in to plant an almost chaste kiss to her lips.

She tries for more but he steps away, eyes roaming over her to make sure she’s presentable.

With a vague “hmm,” he carefully unlocks the door and slowly steps out. He shoots her a quick wink before he closes the door, his footsteps fading down the hallway back towards the kitchen.

Her legs almost give out underneath her and she clutches the sink to keep herself standing. 

That certainly wasn’t how she was expecting this evening to go.

She’s not sure how she’s supposed to show her face and go about pretending like nothing’s happened in front of their families. Maybe she’ll rediscover her ability to lie, kiss Cregan on the cheek and play the part of the sweet girlfriend, but what kind of person will that make her?

She looks at her reflection, at the glimmer of blissful tears and sweat on her face. 

A familiar laugh drifts down the hall.

How is she ever going to look her mother in the eye again?

General Taglist: @randomdragonfires @jamespotterismydaddy

Series Taglist: @marthawrites @urmomsgirlfriend1 @aaaaaamond @boundlessfantasy @sahvlran @tinykryptonitewerewolf @arcielee @tssf-imagines @aemondsfavouritebastard @skikikikiikhhjuuh @queenofshinigamis @lost-and-founds @izzydlb @dc-marvel-girl96 @xcinnamonmalfoyx @padfooteyes @castellomargot @pet1t3