#and then it all hit me at once | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

madamemiz · 1 year ago

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sad: falling out of a hyperfixation

tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it

#oughhhhhhh #this is about the dca fandom but also about every other strong fixation ive had over the years lol #i know it's normal and inevitable esp for less popular works or minor characters with little canon content #and there's nothing wrong with smaller communities of course those rock #but there’s just something special about getting into something at the same time as a lot of other people all at once #and existing in this chaotic fandom space that's just bursting with creativity and passion #i've been in fandom spaces for as long as some of you have been alive and i've only come across that sort of unbridled joy like #a handful of times at best #it's just a heartbreaking feeling to see real lightning in a jar fandoms like that wither away as people drift away #(understandably so!)#anyway don't mind me i'm just having thoughts #musing about fandoms past as well #that i too eventually moved on from but remember fondly even if im not active in anymore #also my music just aint hitting right so im just sitting in silence which makes me more Contemplative(tm)

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benevolenterrancy · 1 month ago

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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)

#svsss #bingqiu #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #lbh #sqq #i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss #the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently #and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything #it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg #as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it #everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person #each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it #at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same #and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical #because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING #aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying #but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line #anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series #i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix #i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship #bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once #bizarre #my art

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venomgaia · 3 months ago

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gal who calls you girliepop and collects bugs

#driftoodles #kulve taroth #monster hunter #nergigante #monster hunter world #her hesvy as fuck golden mantle is necessary btw she flips her shit from anxiety without it #shes the kind of woman who turns down a guy for hitting on her at the bar n she has a mature n refined air about her #but when you go to talk to her all she wants to talk about is her well curated bug collection and their terrariums #again idk where i got the 'kulve and nergi are cousin species descended from the same animal' thing from #i saw it like ONCE and cant find it anywhere so im gonna assume it came to me in a dream #but yeah. cousins #pets their heads #also i havent decided for nergi but kulve and AT kulve are the same imo its just based on her metals (AT is white gold)#also funfact kulve has fangs but shenappears to mostly hsve molars

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ahhrenata · 11 months ago

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distractions ✨

#for all the shooting range fics and what not #i was gonna make Leon’s face angry but i also think its cute that Luis cant see Leons soft expression #just hears the grumpy voice #i once again struggled with luis’ face… its hit or miss for me sometimes #not safe gun practices so don’t do it lol #serennedy #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #luis serra #luis serra navarro #resident evil #resident evil 4 #resident evil 4 remake #resident evil fanart #serennedy fanart

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zuzu-draws · 4 months ago

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Trolling aside, i think there is some great importance as to why Gege chose this specific manner of panelling for the Yuji-Sukuna confrontation in JJK 264. We can't help but think that Gege's trying to show us some sort of a parallel between Gojo and Sukuna in this situation.

In JJK, there's this interesting notion of one's decision to go "North" or "South" as explained by Nanami during Gojo's death Flashback:

And we all know, that chapter of Gojo's death is titled as "Go South", which highly implies that Gojo chose to stay as who he was, as opposed to starting as something completely anew.

Now the interesting point in the Yuuji-Sukuna confrontation is that apparently...

....the destination for the supposed train within Yuuji's domain...is "North".

Which means that Yuuji's taking Sukuna towards the North.......

They're heading towards the North.....do you guys understand what that means?? For BOTH of them??? Q C Q

#why am i suddenly getting the feeling that both Yuuji and Sukuna are going to die together #and Yuuji's grandpa's whole shibangle of “Yuuji make sure you don't die alone” BRO do you UNDERSTAND??#also WHY is YUUJI looking SO happy like all cheery and happy like they're a bunch of friends boarding the train going on a friggin #vacation???#he's all specific bout it too like wdym “ Come on Let's go! Sukuna!” WHAT??#also does Yuuji REALISE that the one he's being all casual and shiet with the KING of CURSES is his last remaining FAMILY??#The only one he could call as “his own” ????? BRO WHY'S THIS ALL HITTING ME ALL AT ONCE--#my heart is </3 ing the more i'm thinking about it i need a few more chapters before i could fully articulate my thoughts well but the #IMPLICATIONS here man i'm just...MAN #sukuna #ryomen sukuna #yuuji #itadori #yuji #jjk #jjk 264 #jjk leaks #spoilers #jujutsu kaisen #king of curses #my thoughts #ooc

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elinordash · 6 months ago

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what do you say?

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stark-lord · 3 months ago

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Side A

#an awful lot of checking each other out going on in this show. that’s all I’m saying.#crystal thinking 'hmm. hit that??' @ every attractive person she sees never stops being funny #yeah girl go getem. let that guy have his situationship back there #kassius does the Niko-specific heart eyes SO well though #and Niko getting appreciated in this outfit makes me unreasonably happy. a field mouse!#also for some reason. this scene reminds me very strongly of laiqualaurelote's band au #was making the set when I realised. woah. same vibes.#dead boy detectives #dbda #crystal palace #niko sasaki #charles rowland #edwin payne #kassius nelson #yuyu kitamura #fuck tagging j&g this ain’t about them #my gifs #think I’m getting the hang of gifmaking?? only my second set and I’ve figured out a full workflow :D #bit addictive once you get started

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 5 months ago

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Battle sprites and extra content from my Dungeon Meshi RPG battle post!

#dungeon meshi #game dev diary #laios touden #marcille donato #chilchuck tims #senshi #The original concept was going to be: Laios attacks -> Marcille special attacks -> cut in animation plays -> enemy defeated #So the doodle battle portraits were more of a hidden bonus and a way to visually confirm the other temporary states worked.#Unfortunately: once a state activates it wont revert! So if a character attacks they are stuck in that portrait until the battle ends #Same with getting hit...At least the K.O portrait works as intended. But I am far too ambitious. I have a vision.#Should we solve this problem I will be back with the full video as intended!#before anyone asks “why are the backgrounds alternating colours? Wouldn't it look better if it was all the same for each state?”#If I don't make it easy for me to know were the invisible boarders for the spritesheet are- my sanity would plummet #My fragile and weak widdle sanity...pwease I nweed my widdle shweads of sanity to stay in tact...#I can only heal my poor widdle sanity by drawing mushrooms with BIG asses and Dungeon Meshi Fanart.

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calciumcryptid · 1 month ago

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Kinn would use pet names because he is the type of dork who would find them genuinely romantic.

Kim would use pet names because he thinks it gets him a good grade in boyfriend, a normal and possible thing to want to achieve.

Vegas would use pet names because he is trying to exert ownership in the ways deemed socially acceptable, but he has to be pretentious about it.

#vegas hits pete with “beloved” one day and they both freeze as it is distinctly not “pet”#macau is in the background happy they managed to use a normal pet name for once #kinns pet names get increasingly more and more ridiculous and porsche can roll his eyes all he wants but he loves it #pete and porsche both get turned on when their partners refer to them as “my weapon”#which is something they would examine in therapy if they ever thought about getting it #no one knows what is going on with kim but if chay giggles and blushes because of an “angel” here and a “bambi” there #well the bodyguards know better than to mention it #also this randomly came to me in my current sleep deprived daze #but when pete is petty he'll start referring to himself with stereotypical dog names #like “spot” or “rover” and the thai equivalents #and it is so fucking weird for everyone to watch vegas get so pissed off about it #macau is just happy vegas isnt like breaking things or going on a torture spree #this has been one fourty five am rambles with calcium who doesnt think these are in character but you know #vegaspete #kinnporsche #kimchay #kinnporsche the series

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suhnshinehaos · 3 months ago

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my heart dropped when i read the statement that sm put out re: taeil, genuinely the last thing i expected to read today. i’m shocked, disappointed, but most of all- i’m angry.

angry at what he’s done, angry at seeing some fans defend him, angry at those turning this into a gotcha moment to promote or lift their faves up. please, this isn’t just some discussion on the internet- there is a very real victim, a very real woman at the heart of all this. i hope she gets the justice and healing she deserves.

#apologies for coming in and dropping this #ik i havent written in a while #truly i have not been in the best emotional state but i needed to let this out #this is an issue that hits close to home to me and i just feel sick to my stomach at the news #always ALWAYS believe victims #goes without saying but moving forward i will not be supporting taeil #it’s a piece of a much bigger picture in how south korean women are being treated #i’ve been seeing a rise in the digital space of them raising awareness and advocating against the sexist rhetoric and harassment they face #i know this is an au account BUT very real women are being affected. real life will always take precedent over silly little brainrots #morals before kpop always #anyways sending love and light and hugs to those who need it #esp the czennies / taeil biased that are disheartened and disappointed #don’t feel guilty for having once supported him- we were all blindsided by the idol persona #idk when ill be back. truly need a bit of a mental health break #but ill see you all again soon <3

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bacchuschucklefuck · 4 months ago

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and! barbarian!fig! its her

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #figueroth faeth #fh class quangle #if u look at the junior year design and think tifa lockhart: yeag #I already thought the cleric!gorgug junior year design kinda is very aerith so. lol #but! I do feel like these designs maybe portray the clearest arc out of all of them so far. I like that #some of it came from a bit of necessity which is really fun that mirrors the actual play format thats cool #(necessity being freshman year riz is pretty much a huge block of red flannel lmao. kinda stole figs canon color coding for a bit)#(and he's got the owlbear jacket from taping the games in sophomore year... so I cant give fig the big red blocking until #junior year lmao. coincidentally this forced me to be a bit more dynamic with her concept which is great)#her second pair of shoes very sonic tho. I kinda enjoy that lol #tbh I really love that canon gorgug is like in a pair of chucks 24/7 that is SO funny for a barbarian I hope to keep the energy going #with class swap fig I think a barbarian who wears like collector sneakers is awesome. the foot support is so important to their work #the general idea of a hyperfem girlypop barbarian still ticks for me tbh. idk enough abt the zeitgeist to know if thats passé now or not #but doing Fashion on ur job of bodily tearing ur opponent apart with the least flourish possible is just a hit for me #her knee brace is from like an injury back in her cheer days that she got by overexercising in hope of being good enough that #the team couldn't let her go. the team then used that same injury as a pretext to let her go #I think abt her arc tbh... fig's thing in canon junior year abt the point of her rebelling. I feel like a lot of it can also apply to rage #both knocking things over and holding onto things don't like. make anything new. destruction without at least a glimpse of a vision #of the after is ultimately a cynical defeatist point of view... strategic barbarianism for fig babeyy #yay! once again its time for me to Fucking Sleep. but hopefully I can hammer out a proper ref for riz and gorgug both in the #following week inbetween doing my job. its that time of da year lads (<- fully seasonal worker)

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moeblob · 5 months ago

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A lil guy !

#honkai star rail #dan heng #genuinely have a million things i wanna draw and then zero energy #so dan heng in a hoodie #now i gotta go get dinner sooooo maybe that will give energy and then i can draw more of what i actually wanna draw #but i kinda spent like ... hours ? talking to my mom earlier today #since shes been in the hospital for many many days #so i was catching her up on whats been goin on and showed her silly lil videos #and telling her how hyped i was for summer hrid and she (very patient with my fe talk)#was like you always tell me about banners being bad so it must have made you REALLY happy to say the whole banner is good #and im like yeah and i had multiple people on multiple sites like hey salmon/moeblob did ya see the banner #and she was like thats so cool that people acknowledge who you like and im like yeah it is p cool #and then i told her how mad i was at the absolutely criminal act of limiting how you can watch clue (1985 hit movie)#like i told her yeah sure i own it twice on dvd and once on itunes and that the only way to watch those #are either desktop or ps2 and how i dont have access to my itunes email #and i dont have it on my laptop so i sadly would have to rebuy the movie on itunes under a new acct #then i said how i loved that it was free to watch with ads on yt and id watched it twice that way #but then recently wanted to watch it on there but laptop and hoo boy you have to buy or rent it now #so i v angrily was like fine whatever ill do the thing and leave my room and go watch it on my moms tv #while she isnt around and use her amazon prime where it should be included except ! IT WASNT!#YOU HAVE TO HAVE PRIME TO BUY OR RENT IT NOW TOO!#HOW ARE THEY DOING THIS AND WHY ! who in the world is watching this movie so much that isnt me that they have to charge for it now #on all platforms unless you straight up pirate it #and hey why would i of all people be needing to pirate a movie i own physically two times and digitally once #this is literally a personalized attack to me #and my mom was like i understand how you feel cause yeah thats really weird to do to a 1985 movie #and im like yes exactly i have morals and principles that make me opposed to this and its v maddening #and she said she understood and its ok next time we are having power issues and i have to shut down #that if i really wanna watch it i can rent it on her amazon account and i looked at her and shes like oh you feel v strongly about this #and i do! I HAVE HAD IT GIFTED TO ME TWICE ! I BOUGHT IT ONCE! WHY DO I HAVE TO RENT IT FOR MORE MONEY!

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iremiari · 5 months ago

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charles rowland is the type of person to end his marriage vows with "and you're my best mate" then think nothing of it

#dead boy detectives #charles rowland #edwin payne #payneland #edwin x charles #this development is far worse than any heartbreak i could ever endure #or maybe i just got hit too close to home as a gay person who has had feelings for their best friend once #probably both! who knows!!#im also madly in love w charles rowland so i dont blame edwin at all #i too would confess to my best friend of 30 years after hearing them say there was no version where they didnt go to hell for me.#im so sad i am so incredibly sad #edwin is a far stronger person than i am bc. im literally crying rn.#famous posts

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faceless-ghostt · 2 months ago

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well... welcome back to Meme redraw hell ig. Pt 5

will these ever end? idk, probably ┐⁠(⁠´⁠ー⁠｀⁠)⁠┌

(references and rambles under the cut)

I'm still not completely happy with how I draw Thad but I'm getting there slowly, incredibly slowly. Same with Kon, he's not there yet but he's much closer. and I swear that isn't the usual outfit I draw him in, I swear I can do better ToT

Mindless rambles about my struggles with designs aside I've been trying to post more, mainly to get me back in the habit of drawing, but I am working on a larger, not large, but larger project that may or may not have to do with a Young Justice 98 and FNAF mash up and one of the characters is absolutely fucking me over. So I'm just doing easy drawings until my brain agrees with my arms enough to actually draw what I want to draw. I don't think these drawings are things I'll put on the Internet because they are just random drawings, but I'll probably share them to the YJ98 discord server. but I personally think this is a fun AU I am currently making and it will be forced on the world soon, kicking and screaming.

idk why I'm even rambling, probably because it's 2:30 in the morning and my brain is melting from multiple weeks of shitty sleep but ajdgakudgshsixhsv

uh, shameless plug moment, Join the YJ98 discord server that is pinned on my profile, it's fun and great and I want to yap with more YJ fans!