#and then i retook some others as well

[chromeplumbobs]

the bright bridge nine: class of 202x, sophomore yearbook photos

[lady-protector]

and that's a wrap on my tarot series! the upright majors, at least. there may be others sometime in the future if I am seized by a combination of insanity and hyperfixation once again.

you might notice a few cards are a bit (or in the case of the fool and alternate chariot, a lot) different! I did a few retakes for consistency/style.

below the read more I've included a bunch of notes about symbolism and reasoning behind my choices if that interests you!

(tag for individual card posts)

0. The Fool: Ardbert was really the only choice for this one. He's our stand-in, our shard, our mirror. Feo Ul is included partially because of lore (they are my co-WoL's shard on the First) and also because they also fit the themes of adventure and new beginnings and exploration. Most of the cards I played pretty loose on the posing vs traditional depictions, but this one I wanted to hew a little closer, which is why he's on a cliff with a foot hanging over the edge a bit, with his axe standing in for the bindle. This is my second attempt at the card -- the first was in Il Mheg, but I moved it to Kholusia (Ardbert's home) and dawn to more closely symbolize that it's the beginning of something. Attempts: 2. Difficulty: 8/10, posing Feo Ul was annoying.

1. The Magician: This card could have had several subjects, chief among them Alphinaud or a more modern G'raha, but I settled on Alisaie a) because the other two cards I had in mind for her (Chariot and Justice) were already taken, and b) the card's focus on physical magic and depicting the "tools of the trade" reminded me a lot of Angelo's creation! So that's why she's here, and why I set the card in Matoya's Relict, among the tools of magicians who came before (Matoya, Y'shtola). I retook the shot because I was unsatisfied with the blurriness/the way the light covered her face in the first one. Attempts: 2. Difficulty: 5/10, simple pose but working with Impact's spell effect complicated things.

2. The High Priestess: Another that I never questioned who would appear on it. Y'shtola's arc is entirely about uncovering forbidden, secret knowledge and wisdom, so she fits beautifully. The blue-white orb and the purple staff depict duality between dark and light, and how Y'shtola walks in two worlds, seeing things that are beyond sight, standing before an altar/holy place to the Night's Blessed. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 2/10. Premade pose, knew where I wanted to place her -- the only thing was finding a prop for her off hand.

3. The Empress: Hoo boy did Minfi give me some trouble. I knew that I wanted our Antecedent, who provides both authority and care for the Scions, to represent the Empress, but I struggled to find a depiction that wasn't, well, boring. Minfilia is deeply linked with the Solar, and I didn't want to lean too hard into Word of the Mother/Hydaelyn territory, so I settled on a triple goddess-like idea. Attempts: 3. Difficulty: 6/10. Not mechanically difficult, just conceptually.

4. The Emperor: Another one that I knew who I wanted but struggled with the concept. Haurchefant is very much emblematic of the stability, structure, and masculinity provided by the Emperor, but it wasn't until I decided to add his equally-Emperor-coded father that things settled into place. Together, Edmont and Haurchefant evoke the image of father and son as well as king and knight, filling both major male authority roles that the Emperor exemplifies. Attempts: 4. Difficulty: 6/10. Same as the Empress.

5. The Hierophant: this one was one of the hardest to choose a subject for -- the WoL's allies are largely a bunch of revolutionary firebrands, and I disagree HEAVILY with the popular choice of placing Aymeric here. So I landed on Alphinaud -- out of the Scions, he is the one most concerned with tradition and the "right" way to do things, with formal education and structure. He wants to bring Sharlayan into the modern day, not upend the institutions that raised him and that he very much still respects, much like how he still respects his very traditionally Hierophant-coded father. So I placed him in his family home with a sort of smug look since he can be a pretentious little shit sometimes (affectionate). The spell effect is from Kardia, and I paid special attention to having the shapes align perfectly with the lines in the background, to give a sense of stability and order to the shot, especially contrasted with Alisaie's more dynamic and chaotic depiction. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 4/10, entirely in alignment.

6. The Lovers: Hrasevelgr and Saint Shiva are a great choice for depicting the Lovers as two people, but no one does the Lovers in one subject better than Ysayle. Invoking the spirit of a woman who died for love in order to bring harmony to her people, but it truly being her own power and her own choice the whole time... it's great. Her pose is her transformation/summoning pose, turned into a gesture of affection, which I was particularly proud of. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 3/10, posing monsters is always a little funky.

7. The Chariot: This one has two options -- my co-WoL, Marz, and Tataru/Cid/Nero for the NPC variant. All 4 characters share a singular drive and refusal to let anything stop them once they've set their mind to something, and the 3 NPCs have the added benefit of being associated with a literal "chariot" in the form of airship design. Marz's place on Shadowkeeper has some lore associations (Cylva is her shard on the 13th) as well as being a void mirror to Kaede's sin eater shot. For both I wanted to have dynamic poses to evoke the activity of the card. Attempts: 1 (Marz), 2 (NPCs). Difficulty: 3/10 for both, no major hurdles once the lovely @/karoiseka pointed me at an airship in NG+.

8. Justice: The heart of the Justice card is its emphasis on truth, and no character in FFXIV is more committed to truth even in the face of great suffering than Aymeric de Borel. Because of this, the shot is taken at the top of the Vault, where he confronted his father over his concealment of the truth of the Dragonsong War. The card is usually depicted with a woman holding a sword and balanced scales -- Aymeric is holding his sword in a pose used in statues in the Pillars, and the symmetry of the shot/light and shadow split down the middle is meant to give the feeling of balance. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 1/10. I knew my concept, location, and shader before I even went in, and it came out exactly like I wanted.

9. The Hermit: Originally I had Urianger for this card, who still fits well, but when I moved him to Wheel of Fortune, there was a clear second choice: The Exarch. He even resembles the Hermit, with his cloak and staff, holding himself in isolation and possessing secret knowledge with which he guides the party. G'raha has grown out of this role as of Endwalker, but the Exarch fits it to a tee. I wanted to show his longing to return through his body language and reaching out for the portal that shows him the world he is set apart from. Attempts: 2. Difficulty: 4/10. Nothing major but did have to do two entirely separate cards lmao.

10. The Wheel of Fortune: The one I struggled with the most, conceptually. At first I had a more abstract choice, with the 3 starting city state leaders and Tataru, in a sort of "fate leads to the Scions" idea. But then I remembered that Urianger is a fortune teller who uses a wheel-like weapon with a literal wheel of cards, and, well. Yeah. The man is intimately associated with fate and choice, and the choice to place him on the moon is intentional, to separate him from his more secretive depictions in HW/ShB. He is the one who prepares our second option (flight) while giving us the choice to make our first (fight). Attempts: 2. Difficulty: 7/10. He's up on a high ledge that's not normally accessible and that's always a pain in the ass.

11. Strength: The one that started it all. The original shot of Kaede contained some layer elements I wasn't happy with so I ended up retaking it to better cohere with the others. Strength is about confidence and inner strength "leashing" power, symbolized by the woman and the tamed lion, and there's exactly one good lion model in XIV -- Forgiven Cruelty. It also has the fun side meaning of Kaede conquering and wielding the light that almost killed her. For Moenbryda's, I went with something simple -- her axe to symbolize her strength, but with her archon mark and the Sharlayan Thaliak statue prominently featured, emphasizing her intelligence. Attempts: 2 (Kaede), 1 (Moenbryda). Difficulty: 6/10. Kaede's was straightforward enough (though I had to wait an annoyingly long time for the sky to shift colors correctly), but Moenbryda's involved me floating her up on a building so i could get Thaliak in the shot correctly.

12. The Hanged Man: Holy moly this one was a PAIN IN THE ASS. I knew from the minute I started this what I wanted to do with it -- Lahabrea holding Thancred's ankle as he reaches for Minfilia. The Hanged Man is one that I felt it was especially important to mimic the iconic pose on the card, and this was how I decided to do it, but it took me over an hour and a half to accomplish. Anyway, the Zodiark idol stands in for the Tree of Life, which I really liked. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 10/10. Absolutely infuriating to have to pose 3 actors in three dimensional space like that.

13. Death: I only ever considered Estinien for this card. It stands for transformation and change, for shedding the old to make way for the new, and I chose to depict that by having his old corrupted drachen mail posed behind him like a shadow or an abandoned husk. He has left the hate and the rage behind, but the helmet is meant to symbolize that he always remembers it, and carries it with him so that he can do better. His lance is also vaguely reminiscent of the traditional Death scythe. That spot in Coerthas is where he challenges you in the early DRG quests while controlled by Nidhogg, as well as being just visually striking. Attempts: 1, but it took a while. Difficulty: 9/10. The ground is very much not flat, the helmet is on a minion, and I had to change angles and locations a few times.

14. Temperance: I briefly considered Hythlodaeus here, but Krile fits very well. Calm, competent, but unsure of her own worth. I chose Eureka Hydatos both for its importance to Krile as well as its easily accessible water -- instead of pouring from a cup, Krile is looking at her reflection. This one came together so quickly and easily. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 1/10. In and out of Eureka in less than 20 minutes.

15. The Tower: Originally, before I reshuffled, G'raha was going to be the Tower simply because I didn't know where to put him, and I couldn't think of an ally who is ultimately a destructive force, but it always bothered me because he truly didn't fit. Meteion, though -- despite her innocence and unwillingness, is THE destructive force within Endwalker's story. This card had the highest hurdles -- I had to get 7 friends to help me queue for Endsinger and then leave, and I almost couldn't get my tools to load Meteion in properly. After that it was smooth sailing, however. I used the whole lockout timer, but this was only the 4th shot I took, and it's one of my personal favorites. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 4/10, purely for queuing.

16. The Devil: Addiction, obsession, and control -- Zenos was the only answer for this card. I included Zero as well, despite intending this to be a primarily 6.0 and earlier set, to represent the humans bound in chains to the Devil, using the way she's pinned between Zenos and the scythe to symbolize that she's trapped. Afterward I realized this exact shot and character choice would have also worked quite well for the Tower, as well, but I ultimately prefer the Devil for him. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 3/10. Came together surprisingly easily, despite the fact that I had to make Zero's hat touch pose myself.

17. The Star: Symbolizing hope and new life, I can think of no one better suited than Ryne and the Empty. Ryne herself was given her own new life when Minfilia passed on her power, and the ability to make her own destiny -- and she used that power to revitalize a barren wasteland. My first version of this shot had a photoshopped in central star, but I decided to revisit the concept with an in game effect for the star instead. Helios provided what I needed, with the fun extra benefit of some additional rainbows (happy pride!). Attempts: 3. Difficulty: 3/10. Nothing crazy beyond trying to find a good angle to get the star in the shot, as well as Eden and the rainbow crystal. Second attempt I messed up the framing and had to redo it again.

18. The Moon: The card of dreams, fear, anxiety, and secrets, Gaia is perfect here (and a lovely companion to Ryne as the Star), though I did briefly consider Urianger as well. I wanted to have Gaia on the sand, with the moon hanging between the crystal walls of the Empty above her, but the angles would NOT cooperate to allow me to get the moon in the shot. So, levitation was the only answer. Fortunately it suits Gaia well, especially the distance that it evokes. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 6/10. I hate midair posing.

19. The Sun: Another card that sprang fully formed into my mind. Joy and fulfillment is symbolized by Lyse enjoying the morning light in a free Ala Mhigo, thinking of Papalymo. It also allowed me to get both of these very different characters into a single card, as they are very much a package deal, though I did consider Papalymo for the Hierophant as well. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 2/10. Came together very quickly.

20. Judgement: The last two cards of the Major Arcana are very high concept, with very lofty ideals, so they felt hard to pin down. I thought of doing both my WoLs here, or maybe Elidibus with his three forms for light, dark, and balance. But ultimately I ended up on Emet-Selch and Hythlodaeus, as the sort of "final judgement" before the battle with the endsinger, the last step before everything ends. Their literal rebirth, the resolution of Emet-Selch's conflict with the WoL, the not-redemption but understanding reached, our efforts judged worthy -- it all just seemed to fit. The card design is simple but I hope the colors and emotion of the scene carry the weight of the arcana. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 2/10. No major roadblocks.

21. The World: At last we arrive at the end, not only the last posted but the last taken as well. I always knew I wanted Venat/Hydaelyn for this card, as she is the literal heart of our world, as well as an Azem who has reached the end of her journey, as Ardbert was one who was at the beginning of his all the way back at the Fool. But when I didn't use Elidibus anywhere else, I decided to add him here as well, since he also served as the heart of the star for a time. Light and dark united together, watching over Etheirys. The one who destroyed our world in order to save it, and the one who saved our world only to try to destroy it. Perfect symmetry, a completion of the circle. Attempts: 1. Difficulty: 9/10. I had to stitch together 3 separate screenshots in photoshop, with the fore and backgrounds cut apart so I could control the opacities separately. Probably the card that took me the longest, but it was worth it.

[bruhstation]

hello tumbled er

greetings and salutation. it is I, senja heterocaine, speaking to you through your favorite home screens. now you might be wondering: where on earth has senja heterocaine disappeared to these past 5 months? well the answer is as simple as it gets

I focused on my studies.

well yes that is the main reason. but that's like the nerd "obvious" answer. there’s other reasons too. some of which includes me getting into new interests, revisiting my old, hibernating interests, getting involved in university organizations and events, getting more involved in big family stuff since I'm the oldest and the only of-age grandchild of grandma from mom's side.... lots of stuff

so I just finished the third semester of premed school right. honestly speaking, with how I was losing motivation on drawing, the art block post-art fight, and lack of time, I decided to well, take a break. and it’s pretty convenient too since it was early on in the third semester. during the entirety of it I was feeling pretty proud of myself like "oh I've been studying a lot. I've taken a break from drawing and blog stuff. surely things will get better" and it did! not immensely but it's significant enough that for once I don't feel an indescribable sense of terror after the semester ends. the focus of this semester was about reproduction systems and growth and development which is pretty fun? we get to use models and medical phantoms hands-on and poke them with needles and other rube goldberg contraptions. I did miss breeding bacterias in petri dishes and seeing my friends burn the microbiology lab’s ceiling like last semester though. my grades are also improving… slowly but surely

(aftermath not pictured: me lounging on the couch scrolling through quora to see if there are people currently in college wanting to drop out)

maybe I was aiming too high. at least my grades are better than the previous two semesters and my social life is much better than it was back in high school. speaking of exams -- I went through my first osce exam around a week ago (practical exam to see if you can actually perform the skills labs lessons from the entire semester like you're a real physician). it was the most terrifying day of the month. my dentist said I have a big tongue and that’s why I can’t speak properly if I’m being too fast. ntm I WAS NERVOUS!!! MY FIRST OSCE!!! with how I memorized everything I needed, I was pretty confident that I'd pass, though. I didn't and retook the exam the next day. the prelude was the worst crash out ever

ah ptooey. I'll just take it like a champ. my tutor who's 3 years older than me and currently in the anesthetic rotation of co-ass told me that things will get easier but that's very subjective. he's a medical olympiad student after all. my parents are pretty happy though with how my academic life is becoming better so that's that

LETS MOVE ON TO SOMETHING LIGHTER. section B: what I've been getting into ever since bruhstation was put on cryostasis

you know Transformers One (2024)? the transformers movie directed by josh cooley? based on the Transformers(tm) franchise by Takara Tomy and Hasbro? most tragic break up movie of the decade? I watched it twice, squealed once, and left me broken and inconsolable for weeks on end. it made me revisit my dormant transformers interest after 5 years. I've reread the idw comics (mtmte, LL, taao, main transformers comic), and is currently checking out more (reading the wreckers saga right now). god it made me miss rodimus and friends' zany space opera adventures. I've always envisioned casa tidmouth to have the same tone as mtmte... the oftentimes dark humor, fridge horror stuff, weird magic/science, the roller coaster of emotions, confronting the past... its crazy good.

stories where misfits and knuckleheads band together in a confined space while having crazy doctor who-like adventures am I right. like I want casa tidmouth to be like that. remind me to thank 14 year old me for this trip down memory lane. and as usual, I tend to make self-indulgent crossovers of any interest I'm thinking about at the moment with casa tidmouth

a terrifying sneak peak on what's to come.

I've been working on my oc projects too. you may have seen some of them on artfight (graciela, saudade, altair, etc) but I've been focusing the most on graciela and saudade's universe, children's heterotopia. it has the largest amount of characters in any story I've created (not counting casa tidmouth), the most effort put into planning the stories and weaving in its themes about capitalism, patriarchy, period-typical bigotry, etc. there's human experimentation and they're given powers that range from punching super hard to time and space displacement. I also inserted whatever I wanted into the story. sure, yes, there's a lesbians-only organization of which its members are named off the knights of the round table, theres a mafia that focuses more on the family drama and attempted parricide from all angles, and tragic assassin maids of which their names are wuthering heights references. also if you've been following my main tumblr hajimedics for a while, you might've seen my three fairly oddparents ocs. well I've given them the tezuka star system treatment and inserted them into children's heterotopia as well.

I've also gotten into UTAU production! I've made a number of UTAU covers but haven't uploaded them to youtube. only shared them around with my friends on priv twitter. a good friend of mine assisted in the creation of my own UTAU voicebank! their name is TORKA (like "torque"), their voice bank has a slight accent when singing in japanese (because I'm their voice lol) and CV-only, their in-universe lore is that they're an intergalactic train conductor picking up wayfarers and outcasts trying to find a place in the vast universe, and I love them dearly

moving on! this is a thomas the engine and company blog THIS IS A LIFE UPDATE POST

I'd rather not discuss about how I'm doing mentally in deep detail BUT what I'll say is that I can't confidently say "I'm doing better" or "I'm doing worse" because it always depends on the days. things are okay-ish nowadays. some days are scary. some days are boring. I still experience delusions, (ironically) worried about my anhedonia, and believe that certain bouts of confidence will trigger a jinx, but I think I've been controlling myself well? at least? I keep internalizing the belief that I'm an adult. 20 years old. I have to act accordingly and my life in real life is ten times more important than the internet. things are going to change more and more once I graduate premed and began the co-ass program. I have to think 10 steps into the future. building successful connections before you turn 30. sigma grindset and all that. sorry that was my father using my body as a spirit medium

AND ALSO. ALSO. BACK TO THE BLOG DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME I PROMISED TO MAKE A COMIC BASED ON THE RESULTS OF THE 1000 FOLLOWERS POLL AND NEVER DID UNTIL NOW. I'm terribly sorry. I promise I will get into it I SWEAR procrastination is kicking my ass. I have to plan the dialogue and script and stuff AND DRAW BUT

BUT HERE’S THE FUNNY THING

THE BLOG REACHED 2000+ FOLLOWERS A FEW MONTHS AGO

NOW WHAT DO I DO TO CELEBRATE?

I don’t know honestly. I haven’t done the 1000+ followers celebratory comic, and NOW I HAVE 2000+ FOLLOWERS. THERES 2000+ OF YOU NOW!!!!! THAT’S CRAZY (IN A GOOD WAY)!!!! I thank you all for sticking with bruhstation through thick and thin for around 2 and a half years. I’m glad for all your support, fanarts, asks, and such truly. like wow. 2k. in such a short time too! thanks guys. admittedly, I feel kind of guilty to leave everyone hanging for months with nothing to give, especially with such a high follower number. and realistically? I don’t think I’ll be able to draw as much as I used to. like I’ve said earlier, I’ve been busy with my personal life and oc projects. it’s not like I’m abandoning this blog any time soon? I’m just speaking from a logical perspective, given my status as a student and (possibly, hopefully) future doctor too. I don't want to burn myself out posting like thrice a week, answering asks daily, I want to take things slow. at my own pace. maybe I'll focus on designing side characters as well and thinking about their roles in the story! but that's for another day. I’m just glad everyone’s still sticking around and enjoying my silly stuff

I do want to draw more for this blog! I want to put thomas and co. in more situations. make them dance for all our entertainments. but when you’re an adult, you realize that you have your own priorities. you can’t always do the things you wanna do. you can’t just drop something you don’t like out of the blue. sometimes you have to sigh, scratch the back of your neck, and brave it while saying “I sure am getting old”

oh and also I'm a butch lesbian now. still he/they (heavy preference on he/him), still preferring masculine terms like "mr", "sir", "guy", still as crazy as ever. still aroace too and not interested in dating, something that's been a constant in my identity ever since I'm in early high school. little have changed I can assure you this. I am still senja. senja heterocaine from the net.

and thus concludes senja’s life update post! what will the next post after this be about? something gordon-centric again? serious colored art? old men yaoi? silent hill UK localization? place your bets. everyone loves a good laugh

[intothedysphoria]

Being autistic felt like some big joke.

After barely scraping by a pass from high school, Claudia had threatened to sue the school board. She ranted about Steve not being given the proper support for his exams and after some very scary phone calls, Steve was booked in for an assessment. He came away with gems like:

“Steve is an excessively literal thinker. He does not consider the nuance in instructions or conversation”

“Steve is able to articulate himself well but his handwriting and spelling are poor”

“When I asked Steve about his interests, he talked about basketball for twenty minutes. He got very upset when prompted to change topic.”

The assessment came back. Autism. ADHD. Dyslexia. Dysgraphia. Auditory processing disorder. Steve retook his exams, with accommodations in place, and did much better. He wasn’t into like Yale or anything but it was a pretty ok school.

The one primary drawback was that now he had to attend an autism and disability group every week. For support. So now every single one of his classmates knew that Steve was disabled.

There was one other problem in the group.

Billy Hargrove was fucking phenomenal. He wore double denim, had battle patches on his jacket and his special interest was politics in punk and metal. Really, he was just Steve’s type. Well, from the looks of it he was everyones type.

Billy’s phone was constantly blowing up. He got a steady stream of Instagram dms, Snapchat messages, Twitter replies. It honestly looked exhausting. Not even at the peak of King Steve had Steve ever been that popular.

Then there was the fact that Billy was just a genuinely decent dude. He got angry quickly but that was linked to his autism. Mainly, he just tried to talk to Steve about stuff that Steve really didn’t understand.

The flirting started in earnest after the Christmas break.

Everyone had watched Billy’s breakup with Eddie Munson. The adjective Steve was drawn to use was loud. They were very loud and interrupted Steve’s nightly rewatch of Brooklyn 99.

Billy was very obviously going through something. They’d been together for like three years and that shit sucked. Steve knew that from experience.

What Steve found himself extremely ill equipped to do was answer the message “hey baby 😉😉😉.”

Some variation of that message would drop itself into Steve’s notifications everyday for 9 days. Steve didn’t know how to feel about that.

Sure, Billy was like the recipe for dream boyfriend but Billy was just bouncing around, looking for a rebound. Steves therapist had told him to stop people pleasing so he just didn’t answer for a bit.

Then the messages stopped.

Billy walked into the next meeting looking throughly embarrassed and mumbled a “sorry Harrington” before staring resolutely at the board.

That wasn’t exactly the outcome Steve had wanted either.

Heather, Billy’s best friend, looked like she wanted to slam their heads into a wall. Which was very weird.

She invited Steve to her Valentines Day party, which was even weirder. Steve would never turn down an opportunity to dance to the Backstreet Boys though.

He went dressed in his old Scoops Ahoy uniform, because he was bored and horny, and the first thing he saw was Billy in a red speedo and nothing else.

Steve did not have to excuse himself but it was a close call.

Heather seemed unintested in the actual party and spent most of the time interrogating Steve on his dating history before shoving him into the bathroom and locking the door.

There was an undertone of furious conversation outside before Heather, seemingly reluctantly, unlocked it.

Billy was standing in front of him and Steve tried his damndest not to just stare at his chest.

“Hi”

Why the fuck couldn’t Steve stop staring?

And why was Heather physically pushing them closer together?

Billy cleared his throat and Steve unconsciously gripped at his arms.

Who actually made the move was debatable but Steve found himself in Billy’s arms, shoving his tongue down Billy’s throat.

Maybe not a rebound then.

@shieldofiron @oopsiedaisiesbaby @harringroveobsessed

(Just wanted to quickly post this because I lost the original draft and would be frustrated if I didn’t finish it)

[wishforhome]

random thoughts about viago as king

i've been kind of playing with an eventual fic in which viago becomes the king of antiva, and here are some random related thoughts and history for anyone else thinking about this (in no particular order and kind of rambling):

The succession in Antiva is probably kind of a mess. Fulgeno II has multiple legitimate heirs but countless bastard children, including Viago himself. All the other bastards are living outside of Antiva.

Historically, the succession has often been determined by external forces. The merchant princes likely have a significant say, as do the Crows themselves (World of Thedas Vol. 2 notes: "The Antivan Crows are an order of assassins so entrenched in the nation of Antiva that they have become a political force unto themselves. More than once they have all but dictated who would ascend the throne of Antiva, regardless of who originally stood in the line of succession.")

In order to become king, my guess is that Viago would likely need to accomplish at least two of the following three things: (1) eliminate all the legitimate heirs and any illegitimate heirs with the power or resources to challenge him, (2) have the backing of the merchant princes, and/or (3) have the backing of the Antivan Crows.

The throne in Antiva is extremely weak, with most actual power being held in practice by the Merchant Princes and the Crows. In Eight Little Talons, we learn that Viago apparently believes that if he were to take the throne, he could restore true power to the monarchy; it is my personal suspicion that he would do this by leveraging the Crows to directly support his reign. In order to make the monarchy more powerful, he would need to reduce the influence of the merchant princes while maintaining control of the crows. (Having a close ally as First Talon would undoubtedly make this much easier for him.)

The Merchant Princes are highly unlikely to back Viago for king, since his goal is to centralize power within the monarchy, which would necessarily reduce the influence of the merchant princes.

There's been one civil war in Antiva in recent history, the "Three Queens" era which occurred early in the Dragon Age, sometime after Maric Theirin retook the throne of Ferelden in 9:00-9:02 but before 9:14.

We know that Viago and Fulgeno II have some kind of relationship, as Viago says at the end of Eight Little Talons that he's going to Antiva City to brief the king about what happened at Lago di Novo.

A codex entry notes that "when the Antaam invaded the South, the people there were completely unprepared. Antiva and northern Rivain were overrun quickly, with the invaders pushing down through the Green Dales to the Minanter River, leaving only the southernmost of the Free Marches spared." This suggests Antaam forces likely hold the majority of Antiva, not just Treviso; however, the King apparently remains free [not that he has much actual power], as Viago and Teia send him reports on their efforts against the Antaam in Treviso.

Viago would likely be able to leverage some popular support from the common people given his role in freeing Treviso specifically (and possibly Antiva as a whole) from the clutches of the Antaam, as well as his contributions to defeating the gods.

One potential route for Viago might be if his father legitimatized him in recognition of his contributions to Antiva during the Antaam invasion. I likely won't go this route, but I think it's an angle that could work.

Viago would likely face some opposition in terms of making Teia queen, given that she's both a commoner and an elf, but I believe he would figure it out and make it happen. She might also be popular with commoners given her roots.

It is unclear whether Viago could maintain his position as a Talon while also being King of Antiva. It is apparently not uncommon for members of the Royal family (non-bastard ones, even) to join the Crows (World of Thedas Vol II notes that one royal princess, Liviana, founded the Valisti dynasty of merchant princes and was First Talon at one point). [Talk about overlap: one person was a royal princess, a merchant prince AND First Talon.]

I genuinely think Viago would be a pretty good king. He would be good for the economy, putting the welfare of the nation ahead of the individual fortunes of the merchant princes, and he would be a significant patron of the arts. That said, it would probably be a really scary time to be a noble or merchant prince because if you pissed him off too much, he'd have you killed.

My personal plan for making Viago king is as follows: his father dies of natural causes, and with the succession being extremely contested and with the country on the verge of another civil war, Viago clears the playing field by eliminating everyone else vying for the throne. The Merchant Princes don't want him, but are forced to recognize his claim given the lack of other alternatives, Viago's support from the crows (thanks Lucanis and Teia) and the fact that he is extremely popular with commoners, both because of his role in defeating the Antaam/gods and the rumours that he was behind the string of deaths that prevented another war from breaking out.

[leah-lover]

Closed for maintenance. (Arsenal orgy.)

Reader makes a decision that will change everything. This is part 1 of the orgy.

To better understand read part 1 and 2 of closed for maintenance.

When we arrived at Katie's house they were all there. As soon as we got in Katie pulled Leah aside, which left me alone with Steph, Lia, Alessia, and Caitlin. There was definitely some tension in the room, but no one could speak.

Moments later, Katie and Leah arrived. Leah took the spot next to me on the couch, and Katie sat next to Steph on the opposite portion of the couch.

“ I think we should all relax a little bit.” Said Caitlain with a smile on her face. And with that the whole room calmed down a little.

“Yeah I don't know why we are nervous, you and I, we have done this many times before.” Said Katie, pointing at Steph, Lia and Leah.

“ So what do you know, what do you want to know , tell us everything.” Demanded Steph

“ Well l, I don't know a lot. I know that relationships within the team ruin everything. They certainly ruined my career at Chelsea. I lost friends, a job and a life.” I said which made Leah grab my hand to help me relax.

“ But I also know that I love it over here, you guys are amazing. I love all of you. You guys make me feel less alone.” I added with a smile on my face.

“ This is why I wasn't willing to jeopardize this for my feelings for Leah. I really like you Leah but there is so much to lose for this relationship.” I said squeezing Leah’s hand with a small smile on my face.

“ Hey, I know what you are feeling. When Caitlain and I broke up and she started dating Katie, the dynamic within the team wasn't right. So what we did is create a bond which let us be comfortable, satisfied, and strong as a union. That way I could have Caitlain, she could be with Katie and I could join if I wanted to.” Lia said.

“ This whole concept is based on the idea of freedom and not having to make a choice. You can want multiple people or just one. We communicate really well. We like eachother I love Leah, Katie and Lia all the same. We sleep together, go have dates with each other. We just chose to live our life that way. We found it more freeing. We have been doing it for 3 years now.” Added Steph. She seemed happy talking about what their joint venture made her feel.

“ I joined them only last year when I came from Man united. But they treated me the same way they treat each other. They love each other. We love eachother. There is a sense of belonging, safety , and communication.” added .

By now they were all nervous, checking my face for any kind of reaction and Leah had let go of my hand. However, I wasn't nervous. I really liked the way they looked at eachother. They all behaved in a loving manner towards one another which made me feel safe.

I took a moment before I retook Leah’s hand in mine. “ Hey it's okay, I am okay with this I think. I like the idea.” I said with a smile on my face.

Right there and then the whole room relaxed, and smiles were all around.

“ I like the idea of you.” Said Katie.

“ So do you just get up and start kissing each other or what ? ” I asked jokingly. But Katie didn't take it as a joke. She got up and quickly locked her lips with mine.

I, mindlessly, gave into it. The kiss was soft and sweet. I then jolted remembering the other people in the room.

After my reaction, Leah continuously rubbed my back. “ Hey it's okay, if this is too crazy for you we can stop.” she said

“ No I want this, I want you.” I replied.

This is about to be the best journey in my life.

[darkcircles4lyfe]

Behind the locked door

In honor of Izuku’s mask disintegrating into rubble, I think it’s finally time for me to really dig deep into his character. I’ve been keeping this one in my back pocket for a while. Amid all the talk about Izuku’s fading narration, the “control your heart” subplot, I’ve been trying to find the words to articulate how I know exactly where this is going, at least on a certain level. Most recently, I read this meta from pika who brings up how the word “control” alone can be misconstrued (by us). And then I thought about how a while back I made a similar point, although I said Izuku was the one who got it wrong. At that time, I was holding back a huge piece of evidence because it was external to the story and I wasn’t sure it would be received well. As a result, my argument fell a little flat. Well, now—after 411, right before leaks for 412—it might be my last chance to play this card.

So about that external evidence. I struggle to bring it up because it’s gonna sound an awful lot like I’m projecting onto Izuku if I don’t do it justice. But… I look at the way his storyline has been going lately and I see a pattern emerging that I’m very familiar with. Fortunately, I don’t have to dump a bunch of personal junk on you in order to illustrate this pattern, because a certain personality typing system already has it all figured out: the Enneagram.

Now, hang on. I’m not one to put people in boxes. My trans ass? I managed to get a different result every time I retook the P0ttermore quiz. MBTI, zodiacs—not my thing. But the Enneagram comes the closest I’ve ever seen to covering all the bases and revealing actually meaningful insight, at least for myself. On top of that, I find it extremely useful for fleshing out fictional characters, hence this post will be taking advantage of that.

For those who aren’t familiar with it, here’s a quick overview: The Enneagram consists of 9 individual personality types, each arranged carefully in a sequential, circular manner. They are also simply named 1 through 9. While this might seem kinda basic, there is actually a surprising amount of nuance and fluidity involved. Typing is done largely through personal introspection (you don’t really have to take a test). Adjacent numbers share some core themes with each other, and according to a web of arrows between them, one type can take on either positive or negative traits associated with other types depending on how emotionally ‘healthy’ they are, causing a lengthy spectrum of different ways each type can manifest. That part gets kinda complicated to explain here, so for more info, the Enneagram Institute website is a decent place to start. I also highly recommend the Enneagram album by Sleeping At Last (and if you really want to dedicate some time, the accompanying podcast) to really get inside the heads of the types on a deeper level.

My interest in applying the Enneagram to Izuku comes from observing how differently one can interpret his character based on whether you read him as a 2 or a 9. And even though no one uses this language to talk about him, the distinction accounts for a bunch of different rifts in the fandom: whether you appreciate bkdk’s relationship, whether you can acknowledge Izuku’s flaws and weaknesses, the severity of his vigilante/rogue phase, and most importantly the gravity of his concealed heart, his rage, and what it all means—what he needs in order to grow and triumph.

Discussion of Enneagram types in the fandom is pretty scarce, but where it exists, I have only seen him labeled as a 2. Type 9 and type 2 can be similar at a glance in a lot of ways (actually, 9s can be mistaken for any type because they are like all of them combined). It’s easy to see Izuku as a 2 because he is the helping hero archetype. He puts others’ needs above his own and he is always ready and eager to help. If you listen to Sleeping At Last’s song for 2, you’ll notice that it’s all about care and noble sacrifice with the underlying theme of neglecting or even harming oneself: “I just want to build you up, until your good as new, and maybe one day I will get around to fixing myself too.” Sounds pretty obvious, right? Well, here’s the thing. You really get to know what your type is by how it hits you where it hurts, so I like to focus on each type’s basic fear and basic desire, first and foremost, as a tell. A 2′s basic fear is of being worthless and unloved. Consequently, their most basic desire is to be loved. And 2s have been taught through their negative experiences that love is conditional, something they have to earn from others. They need to be needed. So let’s say you think Izuku is a 2. This means you consider his heroic, self-sacrificing tendencies to be a result of his growing up quirkless and being told he is worthless and powerless because of it. Through this lens, he is trying to prove himself to the world by being useful. Along these lines, you may also assume he is trying to prove himself to Katsuki. Taking this train of thought even further, you may interpret Izuku’s relationship with Katsuki as an obsession of his, where he is either blind to Katsuki’s more negative traits in favor of gaining his love and praise, or else bitterly determined to prove him wrong. This is how a 2 might behave in an unhealthy relationship with an 8, which, yes, I do think Katsuki is an 8. That’s a tangent for another time, though.

But does Izuku ever “need to be needed?” It’s worth noting that while 2s’ search for validation might seem insincere, it is actually motivated by a deep, heartbreaking insecurity. They think they don’t even deserve love unless they are useful to someone, so they do everything they can to be worthy. Does Izuku show signs of this motivation?

If I stop to think about it, I can’t exactly see this in Izuku’s character. Yeah, his dream is to be a hero, and in his childhood, he was denied that dream. However I think we need to take a step back from that for a second if we want to dig deep. I mean, a lot of the other characters also behave heroically, act selflessly, and strive to help. Does that mean all of them are 2s as well? Of course not. So let’s instead turn to observe how Izuku acts with his loved ones, friends, and peers in other/adjacent contexts:

Inko: He is committed to protecting his mother from fearing for his safety. He wants to be good enough to not cause her to worry, rather than good enough to make her proud or make her love him. Idk about his father but at this point I think it’s safe to assume he is deeply unimportant.

All Might: I would describe their relationship as one of mutual responsibility. Izuku feels a responsibility to uphold All Might’s legacy, All Might feels a responsibility to teach him well. Because of this mutuality, I don’t think it quite makes sense to say Izuku deliberately seeks approval for its own sake. You know what I mean? They may be a mentor and a pupil but in practice they are almost more like co-conspirators. They don’t really have a power dynamic going on.

Shouto, Tenya, other friends: Izuku seems to take an interest in what makes his friends tick, and he sets himself aside in order to both analytically and intuitively determine what’s wrong and how to solve it. Examples include his fight against Shouto in the sports festival, and his stubborn concern for Tenya’s reaction to his brother’s forced retirement. He will put himself in the line of fire specifically when confronted with another person’s inner demons. This is not a labor that is asked of professional heroes, it’s just who Izuku is. You can also extend this observation to how he sees through Tomura to Tenko, but I’ll get to that later. Basically, while 2s seek to help in all kinds of ways, a 9’s strategy is always centered on the realm of the mind.

Kota: Adjacent to the paragraph above, before Izuku literally gets into a position where he needs to save Kota, he becomes interested in the boy’s point of view out of genuine curiosity. He doesn’t go “oh no, this kid doesn’t like heroes, I better get him to like heroes.” Instead he seeks out information as to why he thinks that way, and patiently listens. He’s sorry about what happened to Kota, and he understands. Twice (ch 71 and 72), he recognizes the fact that everyone has their own point of view on quirks, and he can’t really do anything about that.

Mirio: This might be one of the most telling examples. Mirio is the platonic ideal of an All Might successor. He’s “perfect.” He even looks the part. While this initially makes Izuku uncomfortable, he doesn’t become insecure and defensive over it. On the contrary, he easily comes to the conclusion that actually, Mirio should have One for All. Just like that (ch 172). If Mirio hadn’t dismissed the “hypothetical,” he probably would have gone through with giving it to him. That’s not how a 2 would respond. A 2 would double down and aim to be better than Mirio by trying to establish some relationship of need, fueled by the insecurity. Their shared subplot with Eri would have looked pretty different, I think.

Katsuki: I’ve mentioned before that I believe their rivalry only exists because Katsuki put it there. First of all, we can see that after the sludge villain incident, Izuku weirdly takes Katsuki’s dismissal of Izuku’s help as practical advice. Like, “oh yeah, I guess what I did was pretty stupid and dangerous, and I’m not cut out for this hero stuff. Now I can move on and find a realistic career.” Hello?? He accepted that so easily. So Izuku clearly isn’t motivated by a desire to prove himself to Katsuki. Even when he proclaims he’s going to surpass him, it’s like he’s happily mimicking Katsuki, not reacting based on insecurity or pride. Izuku is content to meet Katsuki wherever he is, and he’s satisfied with whatever kind of relationship they are able to have, including a rivalry, so he isn’t vying for his affection either. We can observe this when he gives up the role of reaching out a hand to save Katsuki to Kirishima, and also when he thinks about how “blessed” he is to even have a normal conversation with Katsuki. He doesn’t push things. It’s also stated in Deku vs. Kacchan 2 that Izuku doesn’t excuse or overlook Katsuki’s “bad side” but still admires him for his other traits. This is not at all characteristic of a toxic 2x8 relationship.

When 2s are at their very worst or pushed into unhealthy situations, they tend to become more needy and self-centered, even downright manipulative. But at Izuku’s worst, when he went rogue, he pushed everyone away to avoid being a burden. When the refugees at UA tried to prevent him from returning, he was like, “you’re right” and would have turned back immediately if not for his friends, loved ones, and other people who care about him telling him it was all okay. Meanwhile, Katsuki, in true 8 fashion, was pissed off at being rejected and having to deal with Izuku’s stubborn and evasive side (oh yeah, have I mentioned 9s are actually stubborn as hell?), but he made sure to establish that they are (he is) here to step in when Izuku can’t handle things by himself. Katsuki even opened up and admitted to his own weaknesses to show why mutual support is so important. Tbh, a lot of the above can be construed as just super healthy type 2 behavior, but not this. The way Izuku acts at his lowest, and his dynamic with Katsuki? Totally different. Dead giveaway for a 9.

Let’s get into the type 9 itself in more detail to show how it applies to Izuku more deeply—seriously, it’s beat for beat. One of the key differences is, while 2s seek validation, 9s are actually resigned to the belief that they aren’t important. Similar to 2s, a 9′s basic fear is of separation, but their basic desire is actually just peace or harmony rather than love. Notice how these motivations are just like a 2’s, except they have the “self” part taken out. With that in mind, they “achieve” their basic desire through selflessness in and of itself, without the need for recognition. That’s not to say that 9s are better than 2s. In fact, a 9 can be worse, in a way. If unhealthy, they will seek peace at almost any cost to themselves. In other words, they can be more self-destructive while still under the impression that they are doing just fine. “Peace” may refer to the expression of empathy, fulfilling the needs of others, sheltering someone, or mediating a fight—but also to repressing their own opinions and needs, not “rocking the boat,” ignoring negative emotions, or becoming a vessel for someone else to vent to.

What about inner peace? 9s value serenity, and thus they have a complicated relationship with the most tumultuous of emotions: anger. On the surface, 9s look like the type that is extremely slow to anger and highly tolerant. However, as much as they would like to believe this about themselves too, deep down, 9s are afraid of what might happen if they lose control. My phrase for it is this: I feel like a bottled tornado. Personally, I also think of anger as a basic desire to make others feel your pain—not necessarily sadistically, but in an effort to be known, to be understood. The difficult thing to grasp, especially for a 9, is that this is NOT inherently a bad thing. It isn’t wrong to seek sympathy. On the contrary, it is harmful to tell yourself that getting angry is wrong, because it’s like telling yourself that your pain is wrong, your pain doesn’t matter.

The problem is it doesn’t stop there. A 9, in shutting down their anger, ends up with such a low opinion of their own heart, their other emotions dull along with it. They cry less, laugh less, love less. It’s often said that they “fall asleep” to themselves. It all starts with anger. It’s interesting to note how different this whole mindset is from toxic masculinity—where men only feel allowed/able to express emotions through anger. This is sorta like the opposite. Anger becomes the dam rather than the river. For Izuku, I want us to consider that his suppression of anger carries with it the implication that he is hiding other things, too. It’s a given. There’s a whole sea of feelings out there, and we can only see the waves hitting the shore. This brings me to the whole “control your heart” thing. I do think it is worth mentioning that Banjou didn’t just tell Izuku to exercise control. He also told him that his anger could be useful if it is harnessed. With this added context, “control” here means “to master.” And Izuku seemed to grasp this concept… sorta. I think that if Izuku is like a 9, we can assume he has trouble understanding how anger could be a worthy source of strength. His emotions in relation to Katsuki feel more like a weakness to him, a character flaw in a hero, who is supposed to be detached and selfless. But he’s trying to understand, even though he’s afraid of it. He essentially applied the same strategy he used for mastering OFA itself: incremental strength training. Which, okay. Take a moment to absorb how odd that is, in relation to emotions, specifically. Does one learn to cry incrementally? Does one learn to use anger by bottling a fucking tornado?? Like, what, you think you’re gonna be able to let out juuust the right amount of air to avoid an explosion??? No, man… if you want to be the master of your emotions you have to be willing to sit with them. Confront them. Listen to them. Take them in completely and accept them as a part of yourself.

For someone like Izuku, though, it is very difficult to imagine how this is even possible. Tomura, as with every villain, can be used to reflect his hero counterpart’s greatest fear about himself. Tomura literally touches everyone and everything with his rage, and as a physical manifestation of that desire to pass his own pain onto others, destruction radiates from his fingertips. Thus, losing control in this manner must be Izuku’s worst nightmare, as if he would be completely unable to stop the collateral damage like an infinite line of dominoes. But his anger is not something he can overcome, as such.

An overarching theme in this heroes vs. villains conflict is that the villains are not merely obstacles to be overcome. Just think back to Himiko’s bitter rejection of the heroic sense of superiority. She demanded not to be pitied, condescended to, or lied to. Likewise, the answer cannot be that Izuku needs to restrain himself where Tomura doesn’t. What purpose would it serve to show that Izuku is better than him? Certainly not saving Tomura. If this was a battle against AFO, it might have been a different story. In that case, Izuku would have to overcome his emotional manipulation tactics. Tomura, on the other hand, is not so strategic. With his strangely childlike tendencies, he must relish making Izuku mad because it brings them closer to the same wavelength. It’s his own twisted way or seeking sympathy, or at least, the closest thing to sympathy he can get anymore, because he believes he is beyond saving. With that in mind, Izuku isn’t going to get anywhere unless he rises to meet him. Izuku has to match Tomura’s hatred with equally strong emotions of his own, whatever they may be, or else face the loss of OFA (as established in 305). This is not an easy thing to ask of a 9, once they have started to pull the blood from their extremities, become cold and numb. Bringing back circulation is painful and makes the skin crawl.

In case you’re worried about the focus on anger here, I want to reiterate that concealed anger in a 9 is just one sign of so much more. Back when everyone started fretting about Izuku’s habit of self-sacrifice, which would have been the only thing we need to worry about if he were a 2, I was freaking out because Izuku was also starting to look like a person who has too many secrets. You don’t even have to acknowledge the possibility that he lied about what triggered blackwhip. It’s written all over his face all the time these days. It’s especially noticeable when you contrast him with Katsuki after all his own growth. Katsuki confides in people. He acknowledges his weaknesses. He enjoys being himself. He asserts his place. He thinks about Izuku all the damn time and now he even lets himself be soft about it. All this warmth while Izuku is distant, muted, and blank. I know all too well what this state of mind is like. Man, I hate secrets. You get to the point where you don’t know how to talk about even the simplest most inconsequential shit. And the bigger things? They’re like a growing snowball of words in your throat that cannot possibly fit out of your mouth. The “easiest” way to cope is to simply fade into the rhythm of life. Go with the flow.

Since 9s have a natural curiosity about the interiority of other people, they may choose to focus on that in order to divert their own attention away from themselves. Taken to the extreme, they will lose track of their sense of self. Like I said, you can see Izuku doing this as he fights, analyzing the psyche of his opponent, and his match against Shouto in the sports festival was a fantastic early example. They became friends because of how observant Izuku is. His emotional intelligence and intuition are very strong, but gradually, as he has taken on greater responsibilities and experienced more trauma, he has gotten worse at applying these skills to himself. You know, we go on and on about how his narration has been reduced to nearly nothing, and it’s not just an absence of introspection, it’s an absence of self. It creates a lack of ownership over the narrative—what should be his narrative.

Right now, he’s focusing on trying to see Tomura as a person, figuring him out. I think it would be really satisfyingly ironic if in the process, he ends up uncovering insights about himself instead. It’s about time we learn what Izuku’s secrets are. I don’t actually think that Izuku mastering anger will constitute the emotion that is strong enough to keep Tomura from taking OFA. Moreover, he can’t expect to reach Tomura’s core, Tenko, unless he exposes his own. Rather, anger is the conduit for Izuku to unlock something else. Think of the way he described how Katsuki is his image of victory. The feeling manifests when he asserts a stronger sense of self (the urge to win) and he becomes more free with his words. I have no doubt that Tomura has the power to make unfiltered honesty spill out of him. He knows how to bring out his selfish needs, his pain, his pressure points, his fears, his insecurities. Hell, maybe Mt. Fuji erupting is a metaphor. I want to see Izuku explode while Tomura watches with mad glee. But then I want Izuku to Realize Things such that it finally sets him free. Then, instead of Tomura witnessing yet another person he touches fall apart, he gets to see someone become whole.

"I let the scale tip, feel all of it. It's uncomfortable but right. And we were born to try to see each other through. To know and love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we'll ever do." --Sleeping At Last, 'Nine'

[scotianostra]

On the 19th of February 1314, James Douglas retook Roxburgh Castle and razed it to the ground.

Some accounts have put the Black Douglas attack of Roxburgh Castle to 1314. Historic Environment Scotland puts it to 1313, I always understood it to be in 1314 as part of the final push before Bannockburn but I tend to yield to the view of more learned people .

The Good Sir James, and Walter Stewart led sixty men towards the castle under cover of darkness draped in black cloaks to fool the defenders into thinking they were simply cattle.

The men scaled the walls and surprised the enemy garrison climbing the castle walls using hooked scaling ladders after taking the Castle it was razed to the ground

It is well known that Robert Bruce's policy was to " slight" a castle whenever he captured one, as his small field army was never sufficient to detach garrisons for these fortresses, in order to prevent their re-occupation.

As the Chronicle of Lanercost states, in describing how the Scots dealt with Roxburgh Castle,

"they razed to the ground the whole of that beautiful castle, just as they did other castles which they succeeded in taking, lest the English should ever hereafter be able to lord it over the land through holding the castles."

Although it was rebuilt, more than once, very little remains of the castle as you can see from the photos, the others are depictions of how it may have looked. Roxburgh was also the scene of a tragedy in our history, King James II died here when a canon exploded. The 1314 capture of the castle is one of the inspirations of "The Three Perils of Man" by James Hogg.

[robinsegghead]

Danny's Daycare Part 18

Masterlist

“What the fuck was that?” Jason hissed the second Danny was out of earshot, looking around the table at everyone who’d questioned Danny after his obvious flashback. A few minutes after dessert had arrived Danny excused himself to find the bathroom which Alfred offered to show him too and Jason took the opportunity to thoroughly reprimand his family.

Duke nodded in agreement. “You guys need to chill out. I know we all want answers but cornering and interrogating him isn’t going to get the answers.”

“That was a flashback, right?” Tim looked to Jason for answers which made him feel like shit cause, yeah it was a flashback but why did Tim seem convinced Jason would know much more than they did? He’d never seen Danny like that before.

Bruce had the decency to look abashed. “He’s clearly hiding something, Jaylad-”

“So are we!” Jason hissed venomously. Dick startled at Jason’s tone but he didn’t care. “We all have secrets that’s all this fucking family is! Just because someone else has secrets does not mean you get to know them all! Besides, he doesn’t know ours so he’s not likely to tell us anything of value!”

“Scared.” Cass said, shutting everyone up to look at her. She frowned. “Don’t bring up parents.”

Jason nodded. “Yes- thank you Cass. As a family of people with crazy and traumatic relationships with our parents- do you think we could have a bit more- I don’t know- TACT?” When his family nodded, sheepishly, he sighed. “Let’s hope you didn’t scare off the only friends Demon Brat has outside of Jon.”

A few minutes of uncomfortable silence and glaring later Danny returned and retook his seat.

“I’ve gotta say, your house puts the mansions I’m used to shame.” He chuckled, taking a sip of water. “Like, I cannot wait to rub in the Mansons faces that their house is practically rundown in comparison.”

Bruce smiled back, one of those fake smiles that no one but his family seemed to be able to see through. Jason was pretty sure Danny had seen through it from the start. “You know the Mansons?”

“Yeah, their daughter is one of my closest friends. They hate me.” He tacked the last part on with a mischievous grin that earned a laugh out of Steph and Jason. 

Things weren’t so bad from there. Danny told some story about his best friend’s parents and how they hated him and did their damn best to break him and their daughter up when they’d dated only for her to end up dating their other best friend who her parents hate just as much as him. It was nice and Jason noticed Danny untensing as the story went on and nobody tried to interrogate him again.

Good.

Dick jumped in and started telling his own story- something about Wally probably- while Jason zoned out. Last night he’d gone to the cave to tell B everything Phantom had told him about the GIW, ectoplasm, and the Anti-Ecto-Acts, and, like Jason’d predicted, he was pissed. Most of the family were off doing their own things, on their own cases, out of town, etc. so he, Damian, Bruce, and Babs had spent the night researching.

When Jason finally admitted what Phantom had said about Danny (omitting any information Danny had given Red Hood in confidence), Damian had immediately suggested inviting him and his kids over for dinner to see what they could learn. Jason had protested but Bruce liked the idea, and once Bruce was set on something, nothing would stop him.

So Jason had agreed to come over as well, also omitting the part where he- as Jason- was acquainted with Danny and the boys. Thinking back on their three interactions so far Jason wasn’t sure ‘acquainted’ was a strong enough word for them. He didn’t think they were best friends or anything, but you don’t just call someone sweetheart and flirt as suggestively as Danny had and then call them an acquaintance.

Hopefully.

God, Jason, snap the fuck out of it. He’s GOT a boyfriend.

Then why was he flirting with you?

An uproarious laugh took him by surprise and brought him back to the scene in front of him. Danny was cracking up at something Tim had said, a smug look on Tim’s face confirmed Jason’s guess, and everyone else at the table was laughing along. Jason smiled, watching as Danny wiped a tear from the corner of his eye and admiring how pretty his laugh was and how good he looked in a cardigan and how -

Stop.

Nope. Stop it.

Straightening up, Jason tried to reintegrate into the conversation. 

“I’m glad I’m not the only person who's friends with some crazy theorist who thinks he’s got all the answers!” Danny finally managed to curb his laughter. 

Tim nodded with a smile. “Bernard once told me he thought Lex Luthor was secretly Batman because ‘the butts match’.”

Danny snorted. “Wes works at the Daily Planet and he’s convinced the guy who always writes about Superman- Clark… something- is Superman! Worse- he’s pretty sure Superboy isn’t his son, but his clone!”

The forced laughter around the table was, hopefully, only obvious to the family. Danny didn’t seem to realize the sharp look Bruce gave Cass, then Jason, then Danny, trying to analyze the situation and figure out if he needed to do some kind of damage control. He came to the same conclusion all of them had already come to though and that was- Danny really thought Wes was wrong.

They were saved from the awkward interaction when Santi ran into the room shouting.

“Danny Danny! You have to come see Damian’s cow! And he has a turkey! You’ve gotta come see ‘em! You ever seen a cow in real life before, Danny?” 

Being dragged out of his seat and shooting an apologetic look towards the table, Danny followed Santi out of the room. “You know I’m from the middle of nowhere Illinois, right? I’ve seen cows before…”

Once again out of earshot, Bruce started talking. “I want everything you can find on this Wes who works at the Daily Planet.” Tim nodded, already typing something on his phone. “Jason why don’t you go with them, keep an eye on Danny and the boys.”

“And you’ll be..?” Jason asked accusatorially.

Raising his hands in surrender, Bruce sighed. “We’ll be around, I don’t want to… overwhelm him again.”

“You mean send him into a flashback about his traumatic childhood?” Jason scoffed.

“You never mentioned he had a traumatic childhood.” Bruce pointed out.

Shrugging, Jason stood to escape the conversation. “There’s a lot about Danny I haven’t told you, but I think we can all agree the way he reacted to being asked about his parents and hometown wasn’t the reaction of someone with fond memories.”

He could hear his family trying to excuse themselves from what had happened as he left. At least they hadn’t ALL bombarded him. Duke had been pretty quiet at dinner, Cass obviously hadn’t said much, happier to observe and analyze, and Tim had mostly talked to him about Kon and Bernard.

Danny had seemed rather interested in Tim and his boyfriends which threw him for a loop. Jason would never claim to be a detective. He wasn’t like Bruce and Tim, hell he wasn’t even as good as Damian, Dick, or Steph when it came to detective shit, but he wasn’t a complete idiot! Except Danny’s interest in Tim’s relationship really had confused him. He’d asked how Tim’s boyfriends were, what they did, how they’d all met, how they got together, and while Jason had put together that Danny and Tim somehow already knew each other, he couldn’t figure out what Danny’s fascination with Tim’s boyfriends was.

Catching up to Danny and Santiago didn’t take long. He found them outside, still on their way to the barn where he assumed Miguel and Damian were, and jogged up beside them.

“Hey guys, checkin’ out the barn?”

Santi smiled. “I’m showin’ Danny Batcow!”

“Batcow?” Danny asked, furrowing his brow in a way that made Jason want to hold his face and smooth away his confusion-

“Batcow!” Santi agreed, hurrying inside the barn with Danny in tow.

Damian and Miguel seemed to be deep in conversation, both crouched down and petting Alfred. Santi led Danny and Jason past the boys and towards the cow. Jason hadn’t ever really seen Batcow. He’d heard the story of how they’d gotten her and ended up keeping her and it was often brought up when Damian asked for a new pet or animal of some kind as a way for Bruce to say ‘you already have a cow, what more could you want?’ but he was never actually around the manor this much.

It was an odd feeling.

To know that his family had large parts of their lives he never witnessed because he was rarely around them as civilians. He heard bits and pieces, Dick taught acrobatics, Cass taught ballet, Damian had a cow, Duke got a job, Steph and Tim were going to GU, but he didn’t know the details. Why would he? Why would he care?

 What age group did Dick teach? Had Cass ever taken her ballerinas to a competition? Did they win? How many animals did Damian really have? Why did Duke get a job at the daycare specifically? What classes was Steph taking? What was Tim’s major? 

Why did he care? He’d never cared before.

But looking at Batcow was like looking at a picture of his entire family that he’d been cropped out of. It left a bad taste in his mouth, to realize he was barely part of the family he’d been part of longer than almost anyone. Isn’t that what he’d wanted? To work alone? To distance himself from the bats and be his own person, neither hero nor villain? 

And yet… He’d been spending a bit more time at the manor recently. He’d been less angry and when the anger receded he saw it for what it really was; hurt, loneliness, insecurity. He didn’t like to think too much about it. He was the Red Hood, feared crime lord, murderer, monster- he was the monster in the closet parents warned their kids about. Who cared if he had no one to go home to? Why did it matter if he had to stitch up his own wounds? He was fine with lonely birthdays and even lonelier death days and he didn’t need them to check in on him he was fine-

“Jason?” A cold hand brushed against his jerking him right out of his downward spiral.

“Huh?” He asked, plastering on an unconcerned face.

Squinting, Danny grabbed his wrist. “Come on, Damian says you’ve never met Batcow.” He didn’t let go of Jason’s wrist until they stood right in front of the cows stall. Immediately, Jason missed the cool feeling of Danny’s hand against his skin. “It really does look like the Batman symbol.” Danny confirmed.

“Tt. I didn’t name her Batcow for nothing.” Damian cut in.

Miguel was eyeing Jason in a manner he thought was subtle. It was not. It made his skin itch. Why did Miguel hate him so much again? Something about flirting with his dad?

Leaning closer to Danny until their shoulders were touching, Jason hoped Miguel would stop staring at him like he’d killed his dad- well. He had. But Miguel didn’t know that- actually wait- did they know Hood had killed their dad? Danny told them, right? Was that why Miguel seemed to like him so much?

“You’re doing it again.” Danny muttered only loud enough for him to hear.

Snapping out of it, Jason looked over to see everyone else had left. “Where-”

“Damian mentioned his dog Titus and I convinced the boys to go play with him. You okay?”

Jason nodded. “Uh, yeah, sorry. I- I don’t usually spend this much time around the manor. Brought up some feelings I wasn’t… prepared for.”

Danny nodded in understanding. “I know what that’s like.”

“Yeah?”

Biting his bottom lip, Danny seemed to debate his next words carefully. “A lot of people contacted me after the attack. Some people I… don’t want to talk to anymore.”

Jason let the silence hang over them for a moment. “Your parents?” Danny shook his head, watching Batcow instead of looking at him. “Good.”

“Yeah. Anyway, I know what it’s like to be… reminded of things you don’t want to think about or… of who you used to be.” 

Swallowing, Jason decided to take the plunge. “When I… died…” Danny tensed. “Things changed. I changed. And I can’t stand being reminded of that. That I was… a better person- a better son- before. Sometimes I… I wonder what it’d be like if I’d stayed the optimistic kid I’d been but… death…” He trailed off, feeling himself getting choked up.

“It changes you.” Danny nodded solemnly. “And no one understands. Even the people who don’t care that you’re different, the people who love you, they don't get it.” He whispered.

Jason nodded.

They stood there, looking at Batcow, shoulders pressed against each other but not daring to move closer, silent, for minutes. Jason tried not to think about how Danny having died meant he could probably understand what Jason had gone through- he couldn’t burden Danny with his fucked up feelings on the matter anymore.

But Danny didn’t seem to share those feelings.

Thank god.

“I understand.” He breathed, finally looking away from the cow they’d been staring at for way too long. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to but… But I understand. I know what it’s like for everyone to look at you differently, like you’re broken, or volatile, or a time bomb waiting to go off, and I know what it’s like for them to want the person who died back and I know that you’re still that same optimistic kid deep down but it’s also impossible to be him anymore and I know that because I’m the same.”

Jason let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding (he had no idea when it started but he’d been able to hold his breath for a really long time recently and sometimes he wondered if he even needed to breathe) and met Danny’s eyes.

“You’re the same person as before but you’re also not and no one understands because that doesn’t make any sense but it does, Jason.” It was at the moment Danny said his name that he realized how close they were. “And it’s fine if you have complicated feelings about your childhood home or your family or anything else because it IS complicated. You don’t have to apologize to me for spacing out or needing space or not knowing what’s wrong because I do that all too.”

Fuck.

He couldn’t breathe. (He wasn’t sure he needed to) When was the last time someone had said something so… tender to him? When was the last time someone had looked him in the eyes for this long? His family usually looked away when they sensed his feelings getting too big, when they saw a hint of green, when they couldn’t take looking at the scarred remnants of the child they’d loved anymore.

Danny kept staring.

Danny held his gaze.

“I… sorry-” Jason’s voice stopped working. He looked down, unable to stare directly into the sun any longer, his eyes burning. 

Cool hands hesitantly grabbed his and squeezed. “You have nothing to apologize for, Jason.”

“This is dumb.” Jason scoffed, pulling one hand away to swipe the tears off his face before Danny could see them. “It happened so long ago.”

Danny shrugged. “I died nine years ago and it still bothers me.”

Jason’s head whips up so fast he almost headbutts Danny. “That’s- that’s so-”

“Young?” Danny guesses with a sad smile. “Yeah, but it is what it is. Besides, sounds like you were pretty young too.”

“Fifteen.” Jason admits.

“Fourteen.” Danny adds. “But it doesn’t matter if you were fifteen, twenty five, fifty five, that shit stays with you. Whether it was for a few seconds, minutes, or much longer, death holds on. It changes you and no one can understand it if they haven’t been through it too. They just can’t.”

The situation felt ridiculous. Jason and Danny, who’d only met a few times (in his civvies anyways), holding hands in his adoptive dads barn, staring at his little brother's cow, crying about their teenage deaths. It was too much. Jason let out a pitiful laugh. “This is the dumbest place to have this conversation.”

Danny smirked. “Well I think it’s fine, but if you want to continue this conversation sometime over, say, dinner, I’d be more than happy to do that.” Jason stared- was that? Was he asking Jason on a- “I mean, I do think you mentioned getting dinner before and I’d certainly like the chance to get to know you better.”

“Are you-”

“Asking you on a date? Yes.” 

Oh. Holy fuck. Either Danny and Phantom were in some kind of open relationship or he’d read the situation very wrong. Either way he didn’t care. “Yes. I’d like that.”

“Yessss!” Someone hissed from the other side of the barn.

Peaking over Danny’s shoulder, Jason spotted Santi crouched behind a stack of hay. Danny also turned around, letting go of Jason’s hands (he tried not to think about how disappointed that made him), and put his hands on his hips (also tried not to think about that or how good his hips would feel in his hands-). “Santi?” Danny said with the patience of a saint.

“Uh… noooo?” Santiago responded.

Danny sighed loudly. “Santi, I thought you were going to play with Damian’s dog?”

The boy, realizing he’d been caught, stepped out shyly. “I was but I- uh, I wanted to see Batcow again?”

“Nice try, kid.” Danny deadpanned. “Come on, let’s go find your brother. I don’t want to leave you alone and I think I’ve been a terrible guest.”

Jason tilted his head. “How so?”

With a smirk, Danny crossed his arms. “Well it was rude to leave mid-interrogation. I’m sure there are many more questions your family would like answered before I leave, wouldn’t you agree?” Then he walked away with Santi, and Jason had only one thought.

Fuck.

He’s in love with that twink.

~~~~~~~

By the time Danny and Jason had made it back inside the house, Danny had calmed down and prepared himself for more insensitive questions. He wasn’t exactly angry about the questioning, he kind of found it hilarious, but he wasn’t sure how to explain the whole ‘dead ghost king who’d been vivisected by his parents’ thing so he just didn’t explain anything.

He and Jason came back to what seemed to be a mario kart tournament that Tim, Dick, Steph, and Duke were all competing in. Cass watched from the sidelines, she’d apparently been banned from playing in the tournaments because she always won. They offered Danny a slot but he was happier to watch than to play.

At that point they’d been there for a couple of hours and he was starting to get tired. Life had been crazy recently and even though you’d think getting some actual sleep recently would mean he wasn’t tired all of the time, it had the opposite effect. Like his body had realized how it was supposed to feel after getting a full night’s rest and had started a revolt in protest of the last two months of power naps.

Santi, Miguel, and Damian had gone to Damian’s room to hang out (although Danny couldn’t shake the feeling that Damian was keeping the boys occupied so that the rest of his family could get Danny alone for questioning) after it had gotten too dark to continue playing with Titus outside.

When the tournament finally wrapped up it was almost nine and Danny decided that was long enough for their first time coming over. He sent a text to Miguel to finish up and meet him in the Foyer in the next ten minutes so they could head home.

“Aww, come on Danny, just one match!” Steph whined.

He chuckled. “I don’t need to be demolished in mario kart tonight, thank you very much.” He was actually fairly certain he’d give most of them a run for their money, but he didn’t want to issue a challenge and get caught up in the game. “Next time.” He said without thinking.

“Ha! You owe me fifty bucks!” Dick shouted at Tim.

Tim grumbled, reaching for his pocket. “Come on man, couldn’t have hated my ridiculous family like a normal person?”

“What just happened?” Danny asked, looking between Jason and Cass. Jason shrugged, Cass gave them a knowing smile, and Danny remained in the dark. “All right, well. It was nice to meet you, Steph, Cass, and nice to re-meet everyone else. Duke- no work next week, seriously- take the week off.” He waved to everyone, following Jason to the foyer.

The boys were already there when he arrived and Damian said something about how they were already on their way downstairs when Miguel received his message. Before they could say their goodbyes, a pair of footsteps was rushing towards them. Tim turned the corner, almost slamming into Danny before stopping himself.

“Where’s the fire, Timbers?” Jason raised an eyebrow.

Tim rolled his eyes. “Kon just told me he was on his way with Ma’s pie.”

“I will accept that excuse for the small small price of one piece of pie.” Jason grinned.

“No way! Ma’s pie is like liquid gold- no way I’m giving you any of it!” Tim retorted just as the door opened.

A man, probably about Danny’s age, wearing a leather jacket and sunglasses (it was night?) walked in holding what appeared to be a pie. “Hey guys- I brought-” He cut himself off, immediately freezing and dropping the pie. Tim and Jason shouted as the so-called liquid gold crashed into the ground, pie pan shattering and red liquid seeping onto the floor. Must have been cherry. 

That wasn’t what startled Danny. What startled Danny was the way that Kon stared at him, like he was seeing more than what Danny showed on the surface. Like he was peering past the barriers and barbed wire disguised as jokes and seeing something he shouldn’t.

“Sorry!” Kon squeaked, ripping his eyes away from Danny and kneeling to pick up the ruined pie. Danny heard the quiet ‘what the fuck is wrong with his heart’ whispered under Kon’s breath and immediately felt his pulse quicken. Kon froze again and Danny decided to try something. Something he didn’t do often but his body did on its own whenever it felt like it.

Or rather- whenever his body didn’t feel like it. He stopped his heart.

“Oh my god are you okay!?” Kon shot up, grabbing Danny’s shoulders and looking him over.

Pulling away, slightly startled by Kon’s intensity, Danny’s theory was confirmed. Kon had super hearing. He must have been startled by Danny’s slow heartbeat and panicked. Then he realized Danny was fine and tried to cover it up. Danny stopping his heartbeat would scare anyone with super hearing- it had scared him a few times until he’d gotten used to the on and off heartbeat.

“Kon?” Tim asked, placing a firm hand on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “You okay?”

The man nodded slowly, hearing Danny’s heartbeat return. “Uh- yeah, I’m- I’m good. Sorry, I- I’ll clean this all up, just… gonna use the bathroom first.” And then he was gone, faster than Danny thought was completely human but, well, he’d kind of already confirmed Kon was a meta.

The foyer was completely silent at that point, confusion laced through the room and Danny decided the best course of action was to shrug it off. “Well that was strange- Tim, your boyfriend is odd, but seems nice. Sorry about your pie guys.”

“Uh- I’m just- I’m going to check on him. Nice seeing you again, Danny!” Tim rushed off, leaving the destroyed pie behind.

“That was weird as fuck.” Miguel muttered.

“Language.” Danny said. Really, he didn’t care if the boys swore, but maybe not in the fucking Wayne’s manor? “We’ve got to get going, but thank you for inviting us over, Damian, it was nice to see you again.” Turning to Jason he smirked and spoke so no one else could hear him. “I’ll text you, doll.”

His smirk grew wider as Jason’s face grew pink and felt victory settle in his bones. Despite some of the weirdness, it was a really nice night. At least he’d gotten a date with Jason out of all the interrogating.

~~~~~~

“Kon what the fuck was that?” Tim demanded, barging into his bedroom where Kon had chosen to hide out until Danny left.

Kon turned to face Tim slowly. “He- god Tim he’s covered in scars he-” The man ran a hand through his hair and met Tim’s eyes. “He had an autopsy scar like Jason.”

Tim had noticed Danny’s scars before. He had one on his hand the looked like the beginning of a Lichtenberg scar which didn’t make any sense because those were supposed to fade after a few days, he had another on the back of his neck which he seemed to try and hide with hoodies and collared shirts, his fingers on his right hand had varying degrees of scarring like a ring around each one, but he’d obviously never seen more than that.

An autopsy scar was… well it was another clue, somehow. He didn’t know how Danny dying and having an autopsy and coming back to life like Jason had connected to anything else but it had to be why Danny and Phantom- King of Ghosts- had some kind of connection. Was- Was Phantom the ‘friend’ who’d asked Danny to come to Gotham in the first place?

“That’s not all- I mean, that’s why I dropped the pie but- Tim his heart stopped.”

“What?!” Tim hissed, jerking out of his thoughts. “What do you mean-”

“His heartbeat was really slow, it was concerning but then it just- it just STOPPED. Altogether. And then it started again after I’d already freaked out on him.”

What the fuck did that mean? “I have to talk to B- what the fuck, Danny?”

Prev. Next

[onesidedradiostatic]

husk vs the vees social experiment completed

(val poll)

(vox poll)

(velvette poll)

some notes:

when I found the val poll, husk was already in the lead

there was a short period of time where it was fluctuating between a husk or val lead in the val poll, the highest val got to was 50.5%

val went through multiple rounds of reblogs calling to vote val as well as essays arguing in his favour but still lost

there was never a point in time where vox was losing in his poll

I did not ever reblog with any propaganda or called for anyone to vote vox in the vox poll

the velvette poll started with velvette in the lead, then progressed to a period of time in which husk was in the lead, velvette then retook the lead after a couple reblogs with propaganda

the val poll has the most reblogs at 76 compared to vox (15) and velvette (20)

the velvette poll has around 150-170 less votes than the other two

I started the vox and velvette polls in an attempt to see if there was any bias involved in the voting for the val poll, made for an interesting social experiment

do you think there's bias involved? or do you think the results are completely fair based on what we've seen of the characters so far?

[chiefdirector]

Remembering | Tim Bradford | The Rookie

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten

tw: some suicidal thoughts referenced (one sentence)

-----

“What do you know about your case worker, Kade Sullivan?” Grey said, still keeping his gaze on (Y/N) despite her looking away and back through the glass to watch Tim questioning Diaz. “We believe that he may have had some involvement into how Regina Diaz got to a position to leverage both you and the department.”

“Right. I never really saw Sullivan. He stayed away from me. I met him once, maybe twice. He likes to keep a professional distance.” She slowly answered. 

Grey lifted his coffee cup up and took a small sip. “You’re a good judge of character, (Y/N). Did anything seem off about him? I know it was a while back but anything helps.”

“He seemed a bit odd, nervous even. But I put it down to him being paranoid about the operation. I mean it can’t be easy for these caseworkers to not have consistent contact with their UC’s.”

“What do you mean? Did you not check in with him daily?”

“No.” (Y/N) said, looking down. Now that she said it out loud, it was strange that Kade never requested to check in with her and Williamson often. “He wanted weekly check-ups. He never said why though.”

“Is there anything else? At all because the more you can remember, the less leverage Regina will have to bargain with us.”

“I’m sorry, Wade. I really am. I can have a look through some of my journals from that time, I think Tim kept them.”

Grey nodded his head. “Please. I guess it’s now down to Tim.”

-----

“Hello Officer Bradford, I’m glad to see you back in here again after your break. You kept me waiting for longer than I had hoped.” Regina said, posed as a wall of confidence as she had done during every other talk with the detectives. “I found it rather rude.”

“Not my problem.” Tim retook his seat opposite her. He had stepped out when Regina had started to get irate with him, he needed her as calm and rational, well as rational as a drug queen-pin could be, before he could get anything viable from her. 

He remembered the day he had arrested her, how helpless and frightened she seemed. She was backed into a corner, but now she had a fighting chance and by God did she know it. “You wanted a deal. Let me say this one more time. Tell us about Kade Sullivan and I’m sure the District Attorney will be nicer to you.”

Regina smirked. “No. I have something you want. So I lay out the terms. You know what I want after our… exchange but I want something first. I think that is only fair, considering your situation.”

“My situation?”

“Oh you know. How (Y/N)‘s being back in LA will cause some problems for you and your colleagues.” Regina watched, laughing softly as Tim’s face twisted in confusion. “You really think that just because I’m sitting in handcuffs that I wouldn’t follow through on my threat.”

“Whatever it is, call it off. Now!”

“How about you do something for me first, Officer Bradford. Quid Pro Quo.”

“Fine. What do you want?”

“I want you to tell me how it felt two years ago when I forced (Y/N) to vanish. How it felt to lose your wife and not being good enough to find her.”

Of all the things he expected her to say, this was one of the last. He had thought that she would have asked to walk free, or a reduced sentence at the least, but she just wanted to relish in his pain. 

She wanted to know how numbing it felt for him to filter by day to day, his reason to carry on with each day painstakingly stolen from. She wanted to enjoy the powerlessness he had felt when each lead led to another heartbreaking dead end. She wanted him to be reminded of each day, and how they got more and more painful as time went past. Her demand was a reminder of the nights he would drink himself to sleep because that was the only way he could close his eyes and not see (Y/N) face in his mind.

It was a reminder of how he couldn’t look at daisies without crying, or enjoy music, or find a purpose. It was a reminder that he had become a hateful shell of who he used to be, and that even though she was back with him, he didn't know if he would ever get that piece of his former self back. It was a reminder of how he planned for an easy way out for himself if the grief got too bad.

Regina wanted to remind Tim that she had taken it all away before, and that she could take it all away again. And she wanted him to admit that.

“So, Officer Bradford. What will it be?”

Tim launched himself up so he could lean down on the table and over her, “You should know how I felt. It was probably the same way you did when your husband died when the LAPD raided one of his warehouses. I was there that day. I took him, so you took her. But I got my wife back, but your husband is still six feet under.”

“How dare you!” Regina screeched, as she rattled in the chains, trying to find her way out of the cuffs. For the first time since she had been arrested, she lost her well maintained composure.  

Tim took a step back from the table. “Thank you for cooperating. Prison transport will be here for you soon.”

“But what about our deal?! You won’t know what's coming without me.”

“I think we’ll be fine, Ms. Diaz,” Tim kept his back to her as he stopped at the door “because we now know that we were being hunted, so now we can prepare. So, thanks for the heads up. Enjoy prison.”

As soon as the door shut behind him, Tim leant against the door, trying to make sense of what had happened. Surely she was bluffing, they could monitor her calls and her visitation  to try to not allow her to give any command, but if she was as intelligent and conniving as she had presented herself to be, she would find a way around it. 

As he heard Grey and (Y/N) exit the observation room, he pushed himself off the door. Grey held himself strong, not showing any panic or concern at this stage, but his eyes darted in thought, clearly going over the possibilities of what could happen now. (Y/N) presented herself similarly, except her tell was the fiddling of her wedding band. She used to play with her engagement ring, but due to the dangers of the job and the possibility of it causing harm when in contact with a perp, she quickly replaced it with a plain wedding band, identical to Tim’s.

“So what now? You don’t really believe her, do you?”

(Y/N) moved to place her hand on Tim’s arm. “I wouldn’t put anything past her.”

“Then it’s settled,”  Grey said, “We hope for the best and plan for the worst.”

Part Ten | Part Twelve

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

Tags: @xceafh  @kmc1989  @buba424 @salty0cracker @iamasimpingh0e

Tags are open :)

[parrythisucasual]

What About Me? Ch. 2

Pairing: Jax x Reader (Romantic)

Sub-pairing: Gangle x Reader (Platonic) / Ragatha x Reader (Platonic)

TW: Bullying / Implied depression

Content: You get settled into your room and make a new friend.

Your bedroom was rather plain. A desk, a bed with white sheets, and a tacky poster of a kitten hanging from a tree. “Is this… supposed to mock me?” you ask with a raised brow. “Erm… not sure, exactly? Everyone’s room starts like this. You could always ask Caine to personalize it, or get the paint and do it yourself. Gangle is wonderful at drawing- she could make a poster or two if you asked,” Ragatha explained. 

You step into your room, running your fingers over the smooth wood of the desk, thinking, “I have a few ideas… for one, the blankets should be (F/C), not this boring white. I’ll need some desk ornaments, and a few posters too.” You envisioned the perfect room as you listed it. Ragatha smiled, “Well, I can run and tell Caine, if you’d like, you just get settled in,” she waved as she headed back up the hall, “if you need me, holler!”

You turn, settling onto the bed and taking a deep breath. This was crazy, impossible, even, but you were going to get through it. You could take it. You’ve been through worse. At least it’s better than a trip to the emergency room for a broken bone, right? No pain. And it isn’t as if your life before was something spectacular, in fact, it was the opposite. Weren't you now living about a million people’s dream right now? A new, fantastical place with new, interesting people?

“How’s it feelin’, whiney?” your head shot up. Jax was leaning against the doorway, his already typical smug grin plastered across his face. You roll your eyes, “Pretty good, actually, this is gonna be better than my life back home.” Your statement seemed to surprise him, his smile faltering a moment, before he retook the jerk persona, “Oh, yeah? If you’re sooo sure about that,” he shrugged and invited himself into your room, glazing around with disinterest, “I’m betting you won’t last a month. The tough ones crack first.”

Your lips twitch as you resist snapping at him, “Mm, well if you say so,” and lay back against your bed. You were determined to ignore his rather desperate cries for attention. You ran your fingers over the soft white quilt and sighed, relaxing yourself. 

Jax, on the other hand, was staring at you, eyebrow raised and a rather irked expression painted on his face. He narrowed his eyes, huffed, and left the room. This made you snort, he was acting like a toddler who was told “no.” Once he was out of earshot, you began to giggle out loud. His reaction was priceless. You were definitely going to ignore him like that permanently.

“Um… Ragatha told me you wanted a few p-posters?” a shy voice peeped. You glanced up, surprised that someone else appeared so quickly. You glanced up, seeing the ribbon-and-mask girl, then smiled a bit, “Oh, yeah. Gangle, right?” She nods and steps closer hesitantly, sniffing. Her ribbons were wrapped around a small stack of papers and ink liners.

“Oh, do you draw manga?” you ask without thinking. The ink liners were the kind you saw anime artists using all over the internet. Gangle nods, setting the stack of papers on your desk, “I don’t anymore, not really… Jax just makes fun of me for it. You frown, that familiar annoyance tingling in your gut, “Hey, just ignore him okay? He’s just a @#$%*,” your rather unpleasant name being censored by a cartoony boink. 

She nodded a bit, then lifted a sketching pencil, “Um… what did you want me to draw?” You think a moment, then smile, feeling a twinge of sibling-like love for the sorrowful girl, “How about you just draw? I’d like your art on my walls either way.” Gangle perked up a bit, “Anything?” “Anything.” She nodded and shyly began to sketch. You watched her doodle for a moment, then realized something.

“Weren’t you a comedy mask when I got here?” you inquire, wondering if it changed depending on her mood. “Oh… yeah, I was but… Jax took in in the hall…” she blinked and her tears fell, but new ones immediately formed, “I don’t know where he went with it…” So her mood depended on her mask, not the other way around.

You made a small growl, “I’ll go get it back,” you gently pat where her shoulder would have been, “just stay here, enjoy yourself, okay? Don’t worry.” She nods, and you walk out the door, “And Gangle?” you add on your way out, “if he tries to mess with you, just tell him you don’t care, okay? He wants a rise out of you.” And off you went, in search of the annoying purple rabbit. Oh boy, was he about to get an earful.

TAGGING TIME: @lostsoullover (my bestieeee) @dai-tsukki-desu

[qqueenofhades]

do you think there's a considerable amount of (young) people refusing to vote for biden because of i/p, or do you think theyre just a loud minority? i cant really tell, myself

I have been keeping a fairly close eye on polls (at least the good high-quality large-sample ones, not the numerous trash ones which currently flood the sphere), actual voting results, and other empirical data that relies on non-social-media blathering. And while we will still need more data and see if anything changes, at this point I think we can presume that any electoral effect of the I/P situation is already baked into Biden's expected results and performances, and I honestly don't think there's much, if any, of a measurable effect.

I say this because first of all, one of the most recent high-quality, large-sample youth polls (I think it was YouGov, but I can't be sure) had precisely 0% of voters between 18-29 listing foreign policy as their top priority in 2024. There were other expected priorities: the environment, the economy, American democracy, abortion rights, LGBTQ+ rights, etc -- but not foreign policy. Now, caveat emptor about this being only the people who respond to polls, the fact that most polls have been largely junk this primary cycle (notably, they have way overestimated Trump's performance and way underestimated Biden's), and so forth. However, even in libertarian New Hampshire, which tends to wander more than the other solidly-blue presidential election New England states (as a number of them still have Republican governors), "ceasefire" only garnered 1% of all write-in votes, and Biden won commandingly despite not being on the ballot. In South Carolina, he just won 97% statewide, and even the Democrats who skipped the primary due to it not being particularly interesting or competitive (as compared to the highly competitive open primary in 2020) still generally say that they plan to vote for Biden in November. So overall, Biden is doing even better at this point in the primary cycle than he was in 2020, where Sanders' early wins in Iowa and NH were generating chatter about an upset. Once again, this is early and we are working with a limited sample size, but despite everything, I think we can posit that the "Democrats/Black people/Hispanics/young people won't vote for Biden because of xyz issue and therefore We Are All Doomed" thesis is at best, considerably overinflated and at worst, totally untrue.

Likewise, to be blunt: the loudest voices shouting about how they will never vote for Biden because of the Gaza situation either don't vote at all, only voted once in 2020 under extreme duress and haven't voted since, and otherwise aren't being taken into account either in polls (which are bad data because they are by nature experimental and speculative) or actual voting results (which reflect the way real people actually voted in elections). The reason the YouGov sample might not have pulled any voters between 18-29 listing foreign policy as their top priority very well could be because these people flat out don't vote and therefore won't pass any "likely" or "registered" voter screens, so despite all their yelling on social media, there's not been any actual impact. Now, this is not to say that there won't be; there has, for instance, been speculation that Biden might be hurt in states like Michigan, which have a large Arab-American population. Michigan is obviously one of the traditional Blue Firewall states that Hillary lost in 2016 and which Biden retook in 2020, and any electoral wobbling there would be ominous for his overall results. However, this is also reckoning without the fact that there is now a largish chunk of old-school GOP/independent voters who say they will not vote for Trump under any circumstances, with that number growing if he's explicitly convicted of a felony. Some of these voters might sit out, or vote for Biden, or maybe decide to vote for some stupid crackpot like RFK Jr., but the point is, if they do in fact not vote for Trump or even vote for Biden, that changes the electoral math.

Likewise: there are about 40,000 Arab-American voters in Michigan. Biden won the state by 154k votes, or 3.35%, in 2020. Even if every single one of those voters voted FOR Trump this time (which would be insane, but never mind), that alone would not be enough to flip the state from Biden, and that's reckoning without the votes that Trump will lose elsewhere. I've seen a few left-leaning publications such as the Guardian picking up the "will Biden's stance on Gaza hurt him in November" question, and the loud social media blabbermouths want to insist that it will because it makes them feel important, but at this point, I honestly don't see widespread electoral evidence of it, because, put bluntly: Democrats vote. Posturing social media "progressives" largely don't. Therefore for all the screaming they do, their views do not get incorporated into the actual results, which is a damn good thing for us.

So in short: No, as of right now, I don't think there is in fact a substantial anti-Biden protest vote, and the people threatening it the most were never going to vote for him anyway. This has gone on long enough that if it was going to flag up as a major thing, I think it would have. There will always be the idiots throwing away their vote on some stooge like Cornel West or Jill Stein (lol), but once again, these people were never going to vote for Biden in the first place and it is not necessarily the case that we need to put undue credence in their threats. Not that we can slack our vigilance, as we cannot and every single person who can vote blue in 2024 needs to fucking do so if they're interested in continuing to live in a democracy, but the situation is not apocalyptic, and yet again, the Online Leftists are far from the most reliable metric of how effective their screaming actually is. So, yeah.

[riyva]

'what a sweet way to wake me up, baby?' | l.mk

pairings. mark lee x fem!reader warnings. explicit content, minors don't interact (18+), food play, oral sex, unprotected sex summary. you just want to give him a nice morning treat.

the morning has come, and you’re the one who woke up early. mark is still asleep, and now is the perfect time for his treat. you tip-toed as you walked out of your bedroom, not to wake him up. you went to the kitchen to make some milk and took some leftover cookies from yesterday. you brought the milk and cookie before heading back to your bedroom. you’re not surprised that mark is still on the bed, sleeping like a baby. he might be exhausted from last night.

you removed the duvet and crawled over him. mark was so deeply asleep that he didn't make a single movement. you kissed his lips and neck and licked his nipples while his shirt was on. your lips went down to his waistband; you used your teeth to pull it down until his dick was finally free. his dick was also asleep, i see. then i have to wake it up, right?

you ate a cookie dipped in milk before proceeding to wake him up. you let a soft moan at how it tastes perfect—wondering how this could also be perfect for you, baby. you licked his pinkish tip before taking it in your mouth. and you felt his dick getting hard and earning soft groans from his mouth. hmm. he’s waking up, i see. you pulled out, and you saw his pre-cum licking out; you didn’t want to waste it, so you licked it out. and you retook him; you swirled your tongue around him while massaging his balls.

after a few minutes, you felt his hand on your hair, pushing you to go deeper. “fuck, baby.” you pulled out, leaving a popping sound. you went up to kiss him. “good morning, markie.” he chased your lips, locking them to his, and he pulled your head to deepen the kiss. moans filled the room, and hands roamed each other’s bodies.

“what a sweet way to wake me up, baby?”

you just sweetly smiled. “we’re just starting, baby. so buckle up.” you took the glass of milk and a sip—you didn’t swallow it; instead, you went to his lips and fed him the milk. he didn’t even protest, so he opened his mouth to accept the milk until nothing was left. he liked it.

he grabbed your frame before flipping you, and now he’s on top of you. “you know that i love milk, but i think i love how you make me drink it, baby.” your entire bedroom was permeated with lust. you want to make him feel good, and no one can stop you, even him. he lowered his head, and you were happy to have him kiss you once more. you put your arms around his strong shoulder and flipped him over.

you grind in his member earning a moan from him. he grips your hips as he thinks he might cum while you're doing this. you licked his shell up close to his ear and said softly, “gonna make you feel good, baby, and obey mommy, ‘kay?” mark moaned under his breath as shivers of ecstasy ran up and down his body. since he is the one who often performs all the work in bed, he prefers your dominating side.

he spanked your butt, “give me what you got, baby.” you removed his shirt and shorts, which left you in awe. you let your hands wander all over his well-built body.

“just lay down, and i’ll do the work, m’kay?”

“yes, miss-ma'am.”

you poured the milk into his beads and licked it off. down to his torso and to his member. the room filled with groans, moans, and curses as you retook him with the milk. you swirl your tongue around his tip and lick the slit where his pre-cum leaks out. it tastes weirdly with milk, but it’s okay with you. you didn’t waste any drop, so you also licked and sucked his balls. you bobbed your head, bringing it all the way to your throat —where it made you feel a little queasy. your face flushed from the cheeks to the neck, and your eyes started to water. he yanks on your hair as he pulls down your head until the tip of your nose touches his abdomen. you paused to catch your breath, poured the rest of the milk into his dick, and continued to bob your head and massage his balls as he cum down to your throat.

you stood up and stripped all of your clothes while mark was catching his breath from the mind-blowing orgasm. you start kissing his thigh and work your way up to his lips. then, you sat on his face.

“eat me.”

he doesn't need to be told twice. he pushed your hips lower to his and kissed your labia before separating your folds until his tongue went to your sensitive bud; it sent an electric shock to your body. when he shoved two fingers in you, your head jerked back and you nearly lost your vision. mark was a mess; your juices went to his nose, cheek, chin, and neck. you were dripping so badly. he looked at your reaction, just seeing your face filled with pleasure, his dick going hard again and yearning to be stroked. you pounded his length while he devoured you. as time passed, he fucked you behind until you both reached the gates of heaven.

“round 2, baby?”

“who am i to say no, hmm?”

and that’s how your morning went.

© riyva

[woso-fan13]

Sicktember 2023: 20 (USWNT)

Cramping Pain

You were trying your best to enjoy the movie playing, but the cramping in your stomach was making it almost impossible to focus. You had been lucky and managed to get a spot on one of the beds- well, it wasn’t luck so much as it was team bonding night was in Christen and Tobin’s room and they had saved you a spot between them. 

You managed to curl up in a ball and power your way through the rest of the movie. Christen and Tobin must have noticed something was wrong, as they quickly shooed everyone out of the room as soon as the credits began rolling.  As soon as the room was quiet, they retook their places on either side of you. 

“Y/N/N, you alright?” Tobin asks. 

You simply nod in response.

You hear Christen sigh before she places a gentle hand on your back and rubs lightly. 

“Sweetheart, I don’t think you are,” she says, “what’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing,” you insist, “my stomach just hurts a little.”

“Okay,” Christen says, “are you hungry?”

You shake your head no in response. 

“Do you have to go to the bathroom?”

“Chris!” you shriek, your face flushing in embarrassment. 

“What?” she asks, face neutral, “I’m just trying to help.”

You feel Tobin nudge you slightly, “answer the question, kid.”

“No,” you respond firmly, “it’s just like a cramp-y feeling. I know it���s not my period, but I have no idea what it is.”

Neither woman has any clue, so they simply give you some pain meds and decide to keep you in their room overnight. Once they finally kick in, you fall asleep. 

—-

You awake in the middle of the night, the pain in your abdomen so much worse than when you fell asleep. 

“Chris, Tobes,” you whimper in the dark room, “it really hurts.”

The two women wake up, Christen flipping a lamp on to illuminate your figure. You’re still curled up in a ball, your face pale and sweaty. 

“It really hurts, please help,” you beg, voice hitching slightly through your pain. 

Now, the two women still have no idea what the problem is. But they both realize that there clearly is a serious problem and that they need to act quickly. 

They take turns, one staying on the bed next to you while the other hurriedly throws clothes on before switching. In less than five minutes from the time that you woke them, both women are ready to walk out the door. 

Christen grabs her bag that she knows includes a copy of your health information and Tobin grabs a keycard and their phones, and they hurry out the door. You hear the lock quick and count to three in your head before you hear the door unlocking and opening.

Tobin hurried back over to the bed, reaching down and pulling you into her arms. If you weren’t in so much pain, you would have found the situation humorous. Even in so much pain, you did have to admit it was a bit funny. 

Tobin leaves the room again- with you, this time- and speed walks down the hall towards the elevator. She meets up with where Christen is gesturing frantically while talking to a still half-asleep Becky, and Christen wraps up her explanation as the two of you near.

It’s a quick journey out of the hotel and a short drive in the rental car before the three of you reach the hospital. Tobin pulls the car up in front of the emergency room, allowing Christen to get out and carry you in while she goes and parks the car. 

—-

By the time the sun comes up, you’re in a hospital gown and freshly appendix-less. The two women are slumped into chairs in your room, forcing their eyes to remain open. It’s almost as if they fear that you’ll disappear if they allow themselves to sleep. 

Your teammates show up not too long after you’re awake and aware, and you watch as they force Christen and Tobin out of the room. You insist that you’re okay, sending them off to the hotel to get some sleep. 

It’s not like you weren’t well protected, there were a dozen girls standing around your bed staring intensely at you. You wouldn’t be having any privacy for a very long time. 

[oiblackestsheep]

How to Interpret Sakinorva MBTI Test Results

Introduction

People (myself included) often recommend the Sakinorva Cognitive Functions test to help them determine their MBTI type. This test determines which functions you're using and how strongly you use them. Based on this information, it will suggest some MBTI types that you are likely to be based on a few different methods of analysis (described later).

This is test provides a wealth of information and data that can be used to discern your type, but it can still be a little confusing interpreting all of these results. And despite how well thought out this test is, like all MBTI tests, it is imperfect and subject to error, further suggesting that the best way to determine your type is through knowledge of self, and knowledge of cognitive functions.

As someone who has studied MBTI for many years, I am confident in my type being an INTP, but even with this confidence, my top test results was not INTP.

Here, I will analyze my own test results and discuss some common points of confusion that people encounter like if your results indicate that you strongly use some cognitive functions that are different from the function stacks outlined by Myers and Briggs for the type you've been assigned. For example, you're an ENFJ, but your results indicate that you strongly use Ni (expected), and Ne (unexpected). I will explain how to interpret results like these, and other confusing examples, as well!

Results & Discussion

Figure 1.

A screenshot of my Sakinorva test results.

We see that each cognitive function has been assigned a number that has been calculated based on how strongly I preferred to use that function. The higher the number, the more strongly I preferred the function.

The first step I take when interpreting these results is to first put the functions in order from most preferred to least preferred to see if the order resembles any of the known function stacks for any of the 16 types.

Grant/Brownsword Function Type Results

The Grant/Brownsword model - though untrue to Grant's definitions for the types and their functions in From Image to Likeness: A Jungian Path in the Gospel Journey and those of Brownsword's in It Takes All Types! and Psychological Type: An Introduction, this test tries to reconcile the type development stack first proposed by Grant with the more Myers-centric (as opposed to Jung-centric) definitions for the functions used by the typology community today.

Best choice: ENTP

From here, it's pretty clear that my top cognitive function is Ne, with Ti and Ni coming in a tie for second. My top type result is ENTP because the strongest cognitive functions for ENTP are Ne and Ti in that order. This just goes to show that even some of the best tests you can take can still give you an incorrect result. We'll talk about the high Ni in another section. Granted, the second-best result is INTP, which is my actual type, but if I was new to MBTI and didn't know my type yet, I wouldn't know any better!

The full ENTP function stack is Ne-Ti-Fe-Si. Looking at the preference values, we see that on this test, they did manifest in that order of strength/preference 43.8-41-22-17. This information in combination with my very clear preference for Ne and Ti over most other functions is why the top result was ENTP.

Second-best choice: INTP

The INTP function stack is Ti-Ne-Si-Fe, which is very similar to ENTP (same functions, slightly different order). INTP is suggested as the second-best choice because my Ti-Ne and Si-Fe preference values are very close in number, that if I retook the test again, it is reasonably likely that the order of preference could change to reflect the INTP order of functions. Because I have studied MBTI for some time, I know that this is actually the case, and that for whatever reason, I was feeling particularly perceptive (as opposed to feeling more decisive) when I took this test, and scored slightly higher on Ne instead of Ti as a result.

Third-best choice: INFJ

Now this is suggested because I tested as having high Ni in addition to high Ne and high Ti. Because INFJ’s function stack is Ni-Fe-Ti-Se, there is a (weak) argument that can be made for me being an INFJ because the high Ni coupled with Ti could indicate an INFJ who is skipping over their auxiliary Fe (aka a “jumper type” as I’ve heard them called). This is less likely because INFJ’s naturally use high Fe and my Fe scores as low as Te and Fi which aren’t even in the INTP function stack.

This is a confusing hurdle that a lot of people come across with function tests. How can you score high in Ne and Ni? Or high in Ti and Te etc.. This is because when answering questions, you will still tend to prefer the function that aligns with your dichotomy as opposed to its opposite. I do not typically use Ni according to my function stack, BUT given the choice between Ni and Si or Se, I will always choose Ni because it is more similar to Ne than Si or Se are. So if you take one of these tests and score high in both extroverted and introverted forms of the same cognitive function (aka opposite attitudes of the same function), it is most likely that you prefer only one of them, and scored high in the other as an scientific artifact

Fourth-best choice: ENFP

ENFP's function stack is Ne-Fi-Te-Si. I received this result most likely because the test indicated Ne as my strongest function (and Si as the weakest). Since ENFP is the only type other than ENTP with this cognitive function pattern, ENFP is a natural fourth choice. I scored very low on both Fi and Te, which is why ENFP isn't higher on the list of possible choices.

Axis-based function type: ??T?

The axis-based model - this algorithm uses preferences for function axes to arrive at a type, a practice commonly used by magicians and typologists today.

Honestly, why it was only able to type me as a thinker and nothing else is confusing to me. I had exclusively high Ti, so it seems like it should be able to type me as an xxTP. I can see why it would struggle with typing me as xNxP based on the Ne-Si function axis or as xNxJ based on the Ni-Se axis because I had both high Ne and high Ni according to these results. There is very little information about this typing method outlined on their website

Myers function type: INTP

The Myers model - this algorithm stays as true as possible to how Isabel Myers had envisioned function orientations in her types, especially emphasizing the importance of the extraverted functions in determining type. (I may later expand on this in the FAQ.)

It is unclear to me how I received INTP as a result if it is based off of the Isabel Myers' interpretation with the order of function stacks that I have been outlining through this guide so far, especially since Ne was my strongest function in these results, and therefore, should be ENTP. Perhaps I have misunderstood these results somehow. Either way, this is another example of how there is often confusing/contradicting/incomplete information regarding cognitive functions and the tests that measure them.

Myers letter type: INTP

The Myers letters - this test also attempts to calculate your '16 personalities' type through a careful examination of each question and how it would correlation with each of the eight preferences; though roundabout and based only on theoretical correlations, it is reasonable to assume that this result will be more accurate than the previously mentioned algorithms in determining your Myers letter type.

I do not remember how I answered questions that only tested the letters instead of specific cognitive functions, but it appears that I at least answered enough introverted questions to receive INTP for this result. Not much more can be said about this because Fig. 1 only shows the strength of specific cognitive functions, not the metrics for the 4 possible letters.

Conclusions

While this cognitive function test is considered one of the more reliable ones, there are still some limitations including question-phrasing and user-error that can produce inaccurate results even for someone like me who has been studying MBTI for many years who already knows their type.

Test-related Error

Questions measuring the same function with opposite attitudes to both be strongly used because they are being compared to the opposite function of both attitudes that are likely both weak functions. In this example: High Ne and Ni because I always chose intuitive perception of sensing.

User-related Error

Answering questions based on how you currently thinking/feeling, instead of your overall established pattern of thinking/feeling over the course of your lifetime.

Answering questions based on how you would like to think/feel, instead of how you actually think/feel

Over-thinking what a question is asking and answering it in a way that does not reflect your true attitude because you've misunderstood the prompt.

All in all, if you can minimize the user-related errors by getting to know yourself, being honest with yourself about who you are, and answering questions based on how you initially interpret the question before you can overthink it, then you should be able to get a mostly accurate MBTI result.

While INTP may not have been my best choice according to this test, it was still my second choice, so if I truly didn't know my type at this point, my true type was listed as number 2, which is pretty good, overall! It would just require a little bit of introspection on my part and learning more about the functions to come to the most accurate conclusion myself.