#and then does everything in her power to make that happen

[sunnylucy31]

Some asks I got for these in discord, reposting my answers here:

Pierce is on the spectrum, though she does a good job of masking most of the time (until you get her talking about her special interest which is stars and astrology (fun fact she can tell your star sign just by looking at you, very useful power)).

Frieda has BPD, and she handles it by not handling it (that is, she bottles up everything related to it, The Queen must not show weakness to subordinates). Her people don’t say her name and only refer to her as “the queen” out of respect, but a large part of her believes it’s because they disapprove of her (RSD will have you making logical leaps like that, it’s a bitch).

20. Frieda is often jealous of how tight knit her peoples’ bonds with each other are; as the queen she’s often excluded from that since everyone else puts her on a pedestal (as noted previously, they refer to her by title rather than name). More specifically she’s jealous of Hunter’s ongoing thing with Siren, as she’s been yearning for his attention for years and never received it (not in the way she wants, anyway). Again, she handles this by bottling it up, as the queen cannot be distracted by such trivial emotions. Good thing glass bottles are famously sturdy, this practice will surely continue to be a sound one.

If Maya is jealous of anything, it’s her peers’ ability to be content with tedium. With a perfect memory, she’s painfully aware of how much repetition the average day has, but her fellows don’t seem to notice, or if they do, don’t seem to care. Hell, some of them appear to find comfort in the routine, the normalcy. She attempts to shake this feeling off, but like everything else in her flawless recall, she can never entirely put it away.

25. My favorite aspects of both are going to be the angsty parts because apparently I’m a sadist.

For Frieda it’s the dehumanization. The Titans made her to be a living weapon. The gods branded her as an abomination for existing. And her own people turned her into a martyr, a Messiah figure that could prop up their fragile hopes. At no point does Frieda get to be Frieda; She’s Zero, or Priority Target One, or The Queen. Max will be the first person to treat her as human in a long time, and that’s going to be a profound moment for her that I really look forward to.

For Maya it’s going to be exploring all the detriments to a flawless memory and how the human psyche wasn’t meant to handle having that sort of ability. Imagine every mistake you’ve ever made, every abuse you’ve suffered, every pain you’ve felt, as crystal clear in your mind as the moment it happened. How do you heal? How do you move on? I do so love a good “your great power is really a curse” trope.

Frieda certainly wouldn’t think she could get away with it. Tenet Two of the demititans’ code is to do no willful harm against a fellow demititan, and to her mind she isn’t above the code. Her people on the other hand would feel differently. As I said above, they’ve turned her into their Messiah; all their hopes for survival rest in her. While it would be a deeply unsettling event for many, they’d find some way to justify it if only to keep her at the forefront, to keep her trying to save them.

4. Frieda’s innate instinct when scared is to freeze, followed by flee. Years of training have embedded a fight response in her, but part of her still feels the urge to run and hide when shit gets scary.

9. “Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along.” -Terry Pratchett

19. Rage makes Frieda’s calm and collected queenly mask fall away entirely. It’s the one emotion she’s never had much practice at containing, so when it comes out, it really comes out. Violence is basically a guarantee at that point.

Edgy/misc OC ask meme ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Send me a number and an OC, and I'll answer.

What memory would your OC rather just forget?

What's something about your OC that people wouldn't expect just from looking at them?

What is your OC's fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?

When scared, does your OC fight, flee, freeze or fawn?

How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?

How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?

What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?

Would your OC ostensibly be able to get away with murder?

Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

What's an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?

What is your OC's weapon of choice? Have they ever actually used it?

Is your OC self-destructive? In what ways?

If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?

Does your OC have a faceclaim? If so, who?

What is your OC's pain tolerance like?

What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise?

Is your OC more cold and detached or up close and personal?

How does your OC behave when enraged?

Does your OC have a tendency to get jealous? If so, how does this manifest?

Does your OC have any illnesses or disorders? How do they handle it?

What character alignment would you consider your OC to be?

What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?

What is an alternative life path your OC might have gone down? How different would their life be if they'd made those decisions?

What is your favorite thing about your OC?

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 part 6

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7])

(I can't believe I squeezed six entries out of this dang episode!!!)

agatha sees billy waking up and takes her usual moment to wipe all genuine emotion from her face and put on her mask. it's getting increasingly clear that this wretch of a woman is always wearing a mask and playing the larger-than-life uncaring witch she wishes she could be

not that she cares about you or anything.

billy does that thing children do. he doesn't say thank you or ask why she's crying, he asks about himself, his current troubles and fears, looking for guidance. that's the wonderful thing about a parent, they give a child a safe environment to grow and make mistakes and explore. A parent is, or should be, selfless. That billy feels safe doing this with agatha tells you he instinctively trusts her much more than he realizes.

agatha never lies to billy

and the way she's always drawn to teaching and explaining and guiding despite herself. deep, deep down agatha is a nurturing person who only ever got to nurture for a short time

I just realize agatha cannot actually say the name billy, can she? because of the sigil. so this is her going, I know it's still you kiddo, behind all that. I see some people arguing that agatha might actually think he's Nicky at first and personally I don't believe that's the case, the dialogue is muddy only to mislead the viewers before the big Wiccan reveal.

Two reasons agatha knew this was billy all along: she's had three centuries to sit with nicky's loss now. nicky is gone for good, no matter all her tricks and her pleading and her endless pit of sorrow, that is the one irrevocable fact that she will never be able to change. that is the cornerstone, the whole core of who agatha is today. she has lost nicky, she has committed unspeakable horrors to cope with that loss. she is afraid to die because nicky is on the other side and she cannot face him.

The second reason is that agatha loves billy for being billy, not just as a nicky stand-in. she was uniquely equipped to understand and empathize with wanda, and that's even more true for billy because he's a little boy and agatha's whole heart is wired and predisposed to reach out to him. she saw the miracle that was his birth, she saw first hand what chaos magic can do. this is a child flung out in the world carrying an immense power and no instructions on how to use it. he's capable of terrible things that could easily turn him into a monster and a pariah, and agatha is, besides wanda, the only person in the world who truly understands what that means. do you remember what happened to agatha at around the age billy is now? everything in her is demanding to guide and help. selfishly, because all that power would be hers to control. selfishly because he reminds her of herself and she wants to undo what her mother did to her. and selfishly because helping billy would in a way redeem what she did to nicky.

and also, selflessly. because she wants to help him grow and be successful and be happy.

billy created the Road to find tommy, sure. but what he's been doing on the Road is finding community. or rather, getting close to witchfolk to find out who he is in relationship to them, exploring the identity he was born with that he cannot express with his adoptive parents. he started with a lot of silly ideas on what witches should and shouldn't be and created trials that are, let's face it, rather stereotyped and demeaning. next trial is agatha and he is puzzling her out now, willing her to become the ideal witch and mentor he's looking for. he's doing it with the grace of an elephant in a china store, but that's just what being a kid is.

aaand the wall is all the way up and she runs away. but we made some progress there, didn't we?

oh to be a vampire and getting to bite patti lupone's neck

rio looks so engrossed and fascinated listening to lilia! rio just loves people, you know? she loves life in all its multifaceted forms, and that's not at odds with her job description at all. she is The Green Witch, she has embraced nature, which is to say life, so completely that all of it is important and precious to her. my headcanon is that as the original green witch she started ferrying souls because she deeply understood and accepted death as natural and organic and sought to help it along. it's funny, lilia is terrified of her but if asked, rio would have such a long list of things that make lilia special.

and that such a being would fell in love with agatha of all people?? god that is amazing. that is how you write a beautifully doomed epic love story. billions and billions of humans throughout history, and agatha is who caught her eye. and not because agatha is a serial killer mind you, that's just foreplay. it's because she is the most intense, the most interesting human Death ever came across. while others saw a damaged girl, rio saw poetry in her extraordinary complexity

and then, through agatha and nicky, rio experienced grief from a new point of view. Death, no longer impartial.

a wiser future Lilia pays another brief visit

and she's gone. her puzzled little face!

from being awkward and fearing her oddities to laughing with her about it. another step toward a deeper understanding, and acceptance, and love.

look at agatha's body language when she approaches. uncertain, arms crossed. these people have seen her without her mask now, openly weeping about billy

and then she puts her hands in her pockets and postures, ready to underplay things. pppft, crying? moi? you guys must have dreamed it.

alice with her big compassionate heart will never be able to think of agatha as cruel and distant again

agatha picks up rio's flower

rio looks at her

pretends she wasn't looking when agatha looks back

you could cut the damn tension with a knife

jen trying to include agatha??? man they did really see her cying fr

look how interested lilia is! I wish shows could just be 15 hours of women hanging out and chatting, no plot, just vibes

agatha glances at rio as if saying, you know exactly which scar this is. and rio chuckles because she remembers the story. THE INTIMACY BETWEEN THESE TWO. I'm going feral again.

what is this, camaraderie? community? perhaps even, dare I say it, friendship???

agatha doesn't know what to do with herself!

behold the textbook definition of 'awkward turtle'

oh rio's DETERMINED

'no you don't' 'yes I do' STOP IT YOU STUPID GAYS

agatha all casual like honey I've seen every inch of that body

just... the way they fell into a rhythm. the doMESTICITY.

lol jen's and alice's gaydars pinging at the same time. like somETHING FRUITY IS AFOOT. AND WE WOULD KNOW.

and fuck fuck fuck fuck I cannot believe I've run out of space again and I need to do a part 7

LOOK WHAT THESE LESBIANS ARE DOING TO ME (it'll be up in like an hour guys don't worry)

go to episode 4 part 7

[lavellaned]

Actually I think one of the reasons why this game is so awful to get through is how it treats abuse, abusers, and abuse victims.

Under cut due to length of rambling:

First of all, Morrigan. Abused as a child by her mother, Flemeth aka Mythal, learned about the world and how to interact with it in a skewed way. Was treated in a way that no child should be by anyone let alone their parent.

Fast forward to Inquisition, particularly a worldstate in which Kieran is alive. The scene in the fade where Morrigan confronts Flemythal is one of the most important and special scenes in all of dragon age to me.

Growing up through abuse as a child you never think "I don't deserve this", you mainly think things like "Why is this happening to me?" and "Bad things happen to me." You know that these things are bad and make you feel bad, but when your baseline for how you should experience the world is abusive, you don't have the point of reference to think otherwise. And then you grow up. You look back on the abuse through the eyes of the child who experienced it but also through the detached, adult view that you currently have and have to reconcile the two. It's not easier nor pleasant. Getting to the age your abuser was/getting into the position of power your abuser had over you is difficult. Being at that stage and picturing yourself doing what was done to you to someone else is fucking sickening, and then you start to realize "I wasn't the problem, it WASN'T my fault, YOU are the one that's fucked up." But a lot of people can't and therefore the cycle of abuse continues.

But Morrigan does. She straight up tells her abuser "I will not be the mother you were to me." To have a character who survived childhood abuse be able to reach a point in their life where they can take back their personhood from their abuser is pretty damn important, actually. To this day I get weepy just thinking about it.

And then fucking veilguard happened.

Not only does it not matter if Kieran is alive or if Morrigan drank from the well (something that would BIND HER SPIRIT TO HER ABUSER), but Morrigan straight up let Mythal hitch a ride in her. The very thing that Morrigan tried to prevent ever since the first goddamn game? And we're all just supposed to accept and be ok with this?

The only way I can see this not being a complete character assassination of Morrigan is if Mythal just straight up possessed her unwillingly/killed her. Have Mythal use Morrigan as a information receptacle for new players, but also use old players' already-implemented relationship with her as a way to manipulate them. Either way, shit sucks.

Then there's the Crows. You know, the guild who takes children from brothels, orphanages, the streets and puts them through Hunger Games levels of training in which they either die or survive to become a slave assassin for the rest of their life. Not in veilguard. We're all just one big happy family. We rule Antiva, yippee!

Finally, there's Solas. One could argue his entire existence is the product of abuse, and everything that has happened in Thedas is because of it. I think framing his regrets as physical manifestations that want to kill him is a really interesting narrative choice. Unlocking the regret murals was one of the very few parts of this game that invoked a strong emotional response from me, not just because I'm an unapologetic Solas Enjoyer but because the implications are heartbreaking.

And then the game has you sit through the most fucking unbearable CBT group therapy session to talk about them with some of the most annoying damn people in Thedas who treat the literal apocalyptic levels of abuse Solas went through for millennia as something like a joke? And we the player are not given the option to challenge this? This game makes the point to force the player to agree with the flippant attitudes brought up from this.

Then brings up the final scene with Solas. Do I think the meeting with Mythal and Solas was handled well? Yes and no, but that's for another time. Solas is so far in the trenches of the trauma of abuse that he will not stop until his abuser pretty much tells him "I'm done abusing you." I think this was good and bad, again another time.

The way Solas interacts with his abuser is the direct flipside of how Morrigan does. You see more than one way someone can heal/not heal from it.

Morrigan, someone with arguable little power in the world, stands up against her abuser unflinchingly.

Solas, described through history as a GOD, someone with unfathomable amounts of knowledge and power, cowers and offers his abuser a literal weapon to kill him with, unprompted.

If this was a good game, it would be about regret but also about survivor's guilt, something that those who survived abuse have to deal with for the rest of their lives. But it's not, because it's a a bad game.

[thebaldursmouthgazette]

Solavellan sounds like a horror movie to me to be honest. Especially if Lavellan agrees to having her vallaslin removed

Like this young woman in a relationship with a man who continuously belittles her culture at every opportunity, expresses distaste every time she acts like she’s proud of it, encourages her to distance herself from her peoples culture and then tells her that one of the most important cultural rituals her people have is actually a really horrible thing that used to mark you as someone else’s property and encourages her to let him remove it.

And then when he’s removed it, removed the thing that signifies her kinship with her people, removes the thing that is a mark of adulthood within her people, he breaks up with her. So now she has been distanced from her culture, and had the markings on her face that signified her place in that culture removed. She would struggle to return and be taken seriously, even if her clan is nice about it they would certainly find it odd. And she doesn’t even have the relationship she did it for

Or alternatively, when she refuses to change this thing about herself, refuses to let this man who has repeatedly belittled her culture cross that line, he breaks up with her. And she’s left feeling like sticking to her culture, who this man has repeatedly belittled at every opportunity, has caused this breakup.

And then instead of being allowed to get over him, she continues to pine. First for three years, at which point she discovers that this man has lied to her about everything, is several thousand years old, is one of the GODS from her pantheon (holy mother of power imbalances), and not only did he not consider her a real person who’s life had value and meaning for the entirety of their relationship but the reason he broke up with her was because that realisation made him feel bad about his plans to kill most people in the world. And instead of like. Changing those plans. He chose to ignore that knowledge and kill everyone anyway

And then TEN years later, never having spoken to him again, not being allowed to move on, most likely not being allowed to reconnect with her family and culture because she’s been distanced from it by a man who lied to her and abandoned her to kill everyone, most likely facing ridicule for being in a relationship with the man who’s trying to destroy the world, she abandons her home and her duty and traps herself in the fade with him for eternity.

That’s not romantic. Take away the magic and the elfiness of the situation, if you heard about that happening to someone you’d consider it emotional abuse and manipulation. It makes me super uncomfortable to even think about.

Why has she not been allowed to move on? Why has she not been allowed to recover from this betrayal? From this man who belittled and controlled her? Why is it that 13 years later, having not even spoken to him for a decade, she is throwing herself into the fade with him for eternity? Where are her family? Where are her friends? What is her life outside of Solas? Does she have one? Is she allowed to have one? Why is nobody able to save her?

[beautifullilacsky]

I have been feeling weird these days. Frankly, just not great. Pretty bad. I have been belittling myself, trying to hide and disappear. What has helped me? Going for a walk by myself. Listening to an audiobook and realizing there are things that I enjoy doing and that make the time pass. Belasting music through my earplugs while in the bathroom, and looking in the mirror as I start to move my body and dance. Write with myself; so pure and vulnerable. So understanding and loving towards myself. I felt like myself again. I reflected on a drawing, where I added a text. I realized that I was, or am, trapped. I try to disappear, trying to hide from everyone. Hoping to protect myself from dissapointing people and being too much. From them leaving, or realizing they no longer love me. Then I went on to mention how lonely it is here, isolating me and who I am, while there is someone out there who does love me for me. It then turned into wondering why I am here. And why these leaves, in which I tried to disappear, are so heavy. I realize that I am no longer wanting to hide. Rather, I am trapped. Trapped into my own hideaway. Where the leaves are no longer lovingly embracing me, they are cutting into my skin. Reflecting helped me realize it, and realize I want to get out. And I have the power to do so.

Frankly, I want to be like in the gif every single day. I also honestly know that I could. I can find casual magic in everything. I can be so passionate about life and everything it has to offer. That feels like the true me. The one who experiences it all, and is grateful for it. Sure, the other parts of me are also me. But I feel my best when I am I that mood. The mood from the gif. My boyfriend is out right now, volleyballing until the very early hours. His roommate is also not home. It is just me, and gash. I am excited. I have already listened to music and danced, but I also ate too much and feel very full right now. Either way.. it is scary to be so me. To be so vulnerable and truly myself in front of someone. I know I can do it. I acted this way during our vacation. Why is it so hard to just be myself? To trust someone enough to be my true self? It's a safe space, babygirl. Sure, sometimes it hurts in this place. But don't you dare pull back because of it. I mean, to be fair, how could anyone ever do anything but smile when they see someone living life like that? What do I expect? The worst that could happen is that someone finds it interesting how you can enjoy and aren't ashamed in public. BUTO BE FAIR EH? WHHHHHYY IS IT SOMETHING TO BE ASHAMED OF? I fucking LOVE people who enjoy like that. I wish I could be surrounded by them. So baby, if the people around you aren't like that, okay and??? Be like that for yourself. He doesn't show his emotions the way you do? Okay and??? Let him experience his emotions the way he wants to. He can honestly count himself blessed to be with a person who can enjoy life so fully. Please, love this part of yourself. Well, you already do. But do it without shame. Do it proudly. Embrace it, truly. You have been taking everything for granted. It's time to be grateful, and be so without any doubt. Please, enjoy life the way you were meant to. Learn to be yourself, the way you are yourself when you are alone. He might not vibe on the same level, but that doesn't mean you should dim your own light. Yoyoyo, please learn to be yourself. Your silly, cute, life-enjoying self. I love the way you are , babygirl. So will he. And if he doesn't, that's big time his loss. Though, I'm pretty sure he loves this part of you, too. I know you love this part of you, so show off that you love her. She is yours. Show your love off by letting her out, the way you'd want someone to love this part of you. She deserves to come out and enjoy life with you. Whoever else is around. She feels safe with you. Please let her feel safe around him, too. He'd embrace her the way she wants to be embraced. Just like on our vacation. That you can still come out during the daily life without any judgement, you know?

[alpaca-clouds]

Arcane Season 2 - How Bad Pacing Can Ruin Everything

So, Arcane season 2 ended. And I am sorry, I need to vent.

I am honestly not sure whether the rumors are true and this were originally meant to be more seasons. The Riot CEO apparently denies it, but then again, I have seen CEOs confidently go out on stages to talk about a project which they knew was cancelled at that point in time. So, sorry, but I will never ever trust a CEO. Lying is like 50% of their jobs. Being greedy is the other half. Sorry, not sorry.

I am gonna write something about disability in Arcane (overall) during the next few days, but let me just talk a bit about the pacing issues of season 2.

Spoilers for season 2 - all of it - obviously.

Believe me or not, but I know the exact issue of Arcane season 2. It is called: Too many characters. Too many plotlines. It is something that easily happens when writing an ensemble story (no matter what the format is you publish the story in - it happens in books, movies, shows, games). At times it works fine if you manage to weave the entire ensemble into the same main plot. But as soon as you wanna give everyone their own little storyarc with a bit of their own themes, it often goes haywire. Either you will end up dropping some characters to the side and not properly finish up their story, or you will end up rushing everything. Neither is gonna be good.

Here I am mainly thinking... Was the entire Black Rose/LaBlanc stuff planned to be there from the beginning? Was it put in later? I mean, given that the entire story felt like it might set up Mel as a Champion for LoL... How do I put it? Mel was too overdesigned in the show, to not be a future Champion. That was my feeling from the beginning. I don't know if they gonna make her a Champion, but man, it feels like it.

But no, the main issue really is the pacing. There is just too much stuff happening.

I will remain, that the thing that shows this better than anything was the second "arc" of season 2. Episode 4-6. And the general way the entire Caitlyn, Vi, Jinx thing plays out. We have the following things happen in the first six episodes of season 2:

Cait's mother dies

Cait swears revenge and asks Vi to assist her as an enforcer

Vi does not want to. Ends up getting drunk.

Vi decides to do it anyway.

They do a bit of chemical warfare for good measures.

They go down there. Fight Jinx. Vi cannot do it - partly because Isha.

Cait breaks up with Vi and becomes the evil fascist dictator

Vi becomes an alcohol addict.

Except, never mind, Caitlin is already feeling shitty about it next episode.

Jinx gets Vi and Magic Pixie Dreamgirls her out of her new-found addiction.

Jinx and Vi are good again. They go help Vander.

Cait meets Vi for the first time since the break up. They instantly are back on the same page.

Like, there is so many plothooks in this storyline alone that do go completely unexplored.

There are two characters here, that do play a role in the last three episodes too and that felt like they were some proper characters at some point. Those two are Maddie - the Scottish-dialect enforcer girl - and... Frankly, I do not feel like looking up the name. The big burly one, who after the break-up takes care of Vi.

Those two feel like they were at some point meant to be more real characters. But because of the pacing, they are barely ideas. Maddie starts making out with Caitlyn because...? I don't know. Because I literally do not know anything about this character but "she is an enforcer", "she is queer", "she is attracted to power(?)", and thats it.

And the other guy goes with Vi because... Uhm... I don't know. I know literally nothing about this chaaracter other than that he is big and an enforcer. *shrugs*

It most certainly feels like there was some planned version of this show, in which Cait and Vi both had a proper corruption arc. In which we really saw the two of them struggle. In which we actually saw Piltover and Zaun under the control of Commander Caitlyn and Noxus, and saw the horrible things they were doing and what it was doing with Caitlyn. In which we also saw Vi struggling with addiction and stuff.

But that was not the version we got in the end. Instead in this version... things go magically well.

Hooray?

Same with Jinx. Her mental health issues just magically get better when Isha is there, because that is what the story needs to happen now.

Here, too, it also feels like huge chunks of the story are missing. It feels like there was a story going more into the relationship of Sevika and Jinx for a bit. But if that story had been there once, it was most certainly no longer there. It was hinted at, yeah, but that's it.

And then there is the entire magic plot.

Look, I think among the fans of the LoL Lore I am not the first one to say: "Yeah, trying to marry the worldbuilding of Arcane to the established Runeterra worldbuilding does not work, because of the magic." Runeterra so far was always a fairly high magic world - at least that was implied by comics and short stories. Magic was a common thing in this world. Otherwise we could not have that many magic champions and a whole place whose entire thing it had been: "We are anti-magic Nazis building mage concentration camps!"

When Riot said, that Arcane was now the main canon, A LOT of fans of the lore were like: "You get that it is not gonna work." And yeah, Arcane Season 2 clearly shows how it doesn't work.

Because the way they put in the entire "Mel is magic, also the Black Rose is a thing" stuff just... It did not fit in the entire plot around it. Because Arcane had been designed as a world where magic was very rare and strange. But now Mel had to be magic and somehow had to be connected to the Black Rose.

Also... What the fuck even happened there in the end? Why put that in? Why make Mel go against LaBlanc? I am sorry, but that was simply too much for this plot. The entire Black Rose stuff stuck out of this plot like - pardon the pun - a thorn.

Generally there are several relationships that feel, like they had at one point been a whole more explored, but then got dropped to the wayside.

As I said, Sevika and Jinx are definitely an example. Ekko and Heimerdinger as well. I also feel like what was episode 7 of the show was probably originally more than one episodes and slower paced - though it still to me was the one episode in this, that kinda worked in of itself. And that the Ekko and Jinx relationship was better established.

I also feel that Viktor and that echo of Skye was probably at some point supposed to actually have talks. Like: "I will miss talking to you." - "No, you won't." Okay? THEN SHOW ME THEM TALKING PLEASE?!

Which kinda brings me down to the main thing that happened because of the pacing issue. Season 2 of Arcane knew only two extremes in terms of "Show, don't tell". Either it goes full "music video" in whcih indeed it just shows us shit without context or dialogue - or we get the information just via dialogue, in a complete tell.

This also shows in the last episode, with the entire thing of Piltover asking the Zaunites for help, after brutally surpressing them forever. Yeah, I see where they were going with this. About being the bigger people and planting seeds and what not. But frankly, there might have been a time and space for a story like that, if properly told (you know, with giving more of the Zaunites a voice in this story, showing more of the conflict and spacing this plot out over several episodes). But a) it was not properly told, and b) a world in which several genocides happen while Trump somehow won a second term is not that world. Yes, b) is not the fault of anyone working on Arcane. That was simply bad luck on their part. But a) is very much their fault - and even if we did not have a Palestinian Genocide and no second Trump term: Without a) being done properly, it would not have worked. It would have just not felt quite as miserable.

You know, the most frustrating thing about this was, that... While I think that one way or another I would still have hated how the show handles the topic of disability (again, I will write about this during the next few days), I generally might have liked the same plot, if it had been given the needed space to breathe.

Like... Sure, I would have never really been on board with "fascist Caitlyn", or rather with "fascist Caitlyn, who gets then forgiven by everyone". But I could have somewhat swallowed it, if that forgiveness had to be earned. But because of the breakneck speed of this show, it never got earned. I am not even talking about redemption arcs here - those are always a headache - but specifically about the fact that Caitlyn gets instantly forgiven by everyone.

Also, lol. The entire thing with Ekko convincing Jinx to come along off-screen. That was unelegant.

Heck, it feels in the first four episodes, as if there was an arc being set up for Sevika in general. And it feels like that arc needed to happen, given that Sevika ends up on the COUNCIL OF PILTOVER in the epilogue. However, that Arc just does not happen. Then, like... why set it up?

That is general the issue. There is a lot of set-up and very, very little payoff to any of it.

And here is the thing. I have heard people argue about whether or not this was meant to have more seasons. But frankly: I do not think that the writers who wrote season 1 would have written this story this way had they known it would be two seasons.

Mind you, compared to some people I would not rate the writing in season 1 higher than maybe 6 or 7 of 10. It was solid, but not overwhelmingly great. But season 2 in comparison is a 2 of 10, maybe a 3 of 10, if I am being gracious.

And frankly, I do not think any writer, who is in any way worth their salt, would write a story where a main character goes evil, and then do exactly nothing with it. I mean, sorry, us writers, we are a dramatic bunch. And we will not resist the drama being served on a silver platter unless we are forced too. I cannot imagine a single writer, who will go with the end of episode 3 and then not write a bunch of angst with Caitlyn and Vi - unless they were forbidden.

And mind you, CaitVi is by far the ship I am least invested in. But it is simply such a glaring example of where the plot is rushed in a way that it hinders the character arcs.

Oh, and also... Lest. Lest in the first six episodes clearly felt like a character, who was going to play a role. Only to then disappear to not be seen again during the finale. What happened to Lest? Is she dead? Is she alive? I guess we'll never know.

*sighs* I am sorry. I really am. I am just... very disappointed. This has been a mess. And I think it would not have needed to be.

Like, the animation is still the most pretty thing ever made in the world. But man... The plot? The plot sucks balls. And not in the sexy way.

[thewistlingbadger]

I noticed the season 2 is AGGRESSIVELY less political than Season 1. So I'm going to examine the ideologies of three zaunites in order to explore this.

Vander: Vander was the first leader of The Undercity and he was given a special focus in season two, so let's look at his ideology. In the beginning, when Vander was a young man, he believed in the idea of The Undercity being it's own independent nation separate from Piltover. We worked alongside Silco to accomplish this goal, as they shared the exact same vision. The two men spent many years of their lives trying to make this happen. However, on one particular night, one of their demonstrations went south. Enforcers came and killed tons of Zaunites who were protesting on the bridge. One of the people lost on the bridge was Felicia, Vander's best friend. He had known her for years and had been around her children as they were growing up, those same kids who were on the bridge that night. From this point on, Vander's entire viewpoint and ideology completely changes on this night. From this point on, Vander abandons the idea of independency in its entirety. He never tries to pursue it again or even make any major changes to Zaun. He actively discourages people from trying to pursue a "better Zaun" because in his opinion, it's not worth the risk of losing people. As a leader, Vander's goal is to maintain the status quo. Nothing he does actively disrupts Piltover's view on Zaun, everything he does plays into that view. Under Vander, nothing changes in Zaun. They're still poor, they're still oppressed. Vander's biggest value is community and protecting everyone, values that are stitched into the fabric of Zaun. In the flashback we see of young Vander and Silco, we see that the last drop is more or less the exact same as it is in act 1 s1. According to Silco's dialogue in season 1 with chem barons, Zaun has always understood the importance of community. He tells them that before Zaun was anything of substance, the only thing that go them by was their loyalty to each other. So even Vander's importance of community isn't unique to him, it was just something he kept fostering that was already commonplace. Vander thinks that if things just stay the same, if they just stick together and keep their heads down, they'll be ok. That is how he leads. He's willing to do anything to keep the makeshift peace between zaun and piltover, and it's not even real peace. It's more akin to mutual tolerance. He has a deal with the enforcers to keep them away, but it's clear that in that deal, Piltover is the one in charge. And when Vander can't offer up his own people, Piltover breaks that deal and sends enforcers to the lanes.

Viktor: Although Viktor was born a zaunite, we mostly saw him in piltover in season 1. However, he's given a special focus in season 2. He spends the season in Zaun and we see how his presence is impacting The Undercity. With his new powers given by the hexcore, he "heals" the zaunites that have the worse afflictions, whether they be disabilities or addictions. He ends up forming a utopia-like community within Zaun, one where everyone is happy and they're self sufficient. This kind of community does challenge Piltover's view of Zaun. In the commune, there is no danger, no dirt, no suffering. Everyone works together, everyone is peaceful, everyone seems happy. This commune doesn't rely on Piltover for anything, they're relying entirely on Viktor on literally every front. However, this commune isn't Zaun. It's a selective place. Viktor isn't making sure all of Zaun has this community, he's only attracting the worst of the worst in a way. He doesn't care about healing zaun, he cares about healing humanity. In Viktor's mind, society would be better if there was no individuality. If everyone was the exact same, then there would be no prejudice, no reason to suffer, etc. Viktor doesn't actually care about fixing the system or even challenging it. He cares about The Glorious Evolution, a world where everyone is equal in every way. But his evolution wouldn't actually fix problems, it would just mask them.

Silco: Silco had no special focus in season two, but he was a significant character in season 1. As a young man, he dreamed of The Nation of Zaun, a world where The Undercity and its citizen are free from Piltover's influence and prejudice. He works with Vander to achieve this goal. However, on one particular night, one of their demonstrations failed. Violence sparked on bridge, and tons of Zaunies who were protesting on the bridge were killed by enforcers . One of the people that died was Felicia, Silco's best friend. Felicia was the one that encouraged Silco and Vander to pursue The Nation of Zaun. She told them that it was worth fighting tooth and nail for not only for them, but for future generations. Felicia's death was a major loss, but it was also a major inspiration. We can draw this conclusion based off some of the things he said in season 1.

"We came from a world were there was never enough to go around, that is why we fight." "You're too young to remember what the undercity was like before it became an 'enterprise'. We had nothing. You know what bore us through those times? Loyalty. Brothers and sisters back to back against whatever the world threw at us. Now I'm forced to share the air with people like you, who leech off their legacies."

Silco was not deterred by the bridge's failure, and he never gave up on the idea of an independent undercity. Even after Vander brayed him and refused to fight, even when he was cast out by Zaunite society. He kept working on his dream. He spent years of planning to make it a reality, until his opportunity came. Everything Silco does directly contradicts Piltover's view of The Undercity. Under Silco, Zaun managed to gain a bit of wealth, industries were established. We can see that overall, Zaun society advanced while Silco was in charge. Silco doesn't operate like a protector like Vander did, or like a messiah like Viktor does. He operates like a politician, because his goal is a free Zaun. Silco is the worst person out of the three men, but he's also the most political and he's the one that combats Piltover's idea of Zaun the most. He was also the most successful out of the three. When Vander died, his community fell apart. Their loyalty was gone and they all suffered. Viktor ends up being defeated in season 2. Silco managed to actually get an offer of independence while he was alive, and when he died, the council voted YES to Zaun independence.

Things do fall apart once Silco dies, but that's because everything was designed around one man and one goal. Silco was the one holding everything together, which is why everything falls apart in the undercity once he's gone. The most devastating thing about his loss, is that his ideas died with him. We don't see a single person speak of Zaunite independence in season 2. The zaunites in season 2 are just fighting against piltover, they're not fighting for independence, The people of zaun have NO IDEA that Silco actually did manage to get them independence. The fact that Sevika gets a council seat at the end of season two means that Zaun is STILL not it's own nation. It's STILL a state of Piltover.

The Nation of Zaun died with Silco.

I'm not sure why season 2 stays away from politics when season 1 was ALL politics- whether it was from Silco or the council. Maybe they got told to stay away from the subject, or they thought it didn't fit with the direction of season two. I don't know. But personally, I think it's a major loss that the show that centered pollical strife no longer cares for politics.

[ashlynnfall]

group project with jayce and vi - arcane x reader

summary: blurb about you being stuck with vi and jayce for a group project

tags: arcane fluff (because we deserve it after this show), no spoilers (but mentions of s2 scenes and characters), silly, stupid, reader insert, school au, no trauma au, hextech exists in this world, somewhat ooc vi and jayce

warnings: cussing

word count: about 2.4k

a/n: this is inspired by the current vi and jayce accomplishing nothing memes. i love that joke so much, so i decided to write a little story about it! also jinx remains as powder in this since no tragedy has happened. this is my first fic ever, so any advice on how to be a better writer would be greatly appreciated! thanks for reading, and i hope you enjoy <3

------------------------------------------------------------------------------it's your favorite class about your favorite subject full of your favorite people, so what could go wrong?

literally everything, apparently.

your teacher, mr. heimerdinger, announces a group project to the class. soon after, everyone chatters in excitement because you all like each other, so no matter what, you'll all end up with a good group. he starts calling names and organizing people into groups of three. as the options for your group narrow down, you look around to see who hasn't been called yet.

vi...ekko...ooh mel would be great for this, you think to yourself as you survey the crowd.

"mel, ekko, and caitlyn! you're a group," heimerdinger calls out, causing you and the class to frown.

"ugh, talk about unfair," one student murmurs.

"viktor, skylar, and elora, you're a group."

the options keep getting smaller, and as you look to see who hasn't been grouped yet, a horrible realization hits you. all that's left is you, vi, and...

no.

"jayce," heimerdinger says.

stop it now.

"vi."

this isn't happening.

to your dismay, heimerdinger calls your name. you turn to look at vi and jayce who are sitting next to each other, currently celebrating the pair up.

"hell yeah!" vi exclaims, raising a hand up to high five jayce. jayce enthusiastically moves his hand to hers-

and misses her hand.

seriously, how do you miss an unmoving target?

you watch as these bumbling fools try two more times before they can actually hit the high five.

you've got to be fucking kidding me.

jayce talis, the golden boy of the grade. he's a genius inventor with incredible ideas that will take him far in life. known to be smart and charismatic, most people would love to be grouped up with him for any assignment. as one of heimerdinger's star pupils, being his partner should be good news right?

wrong.

vi, the cool girl of the grade. she's not the most academically gifted person, but she does all of her work and tries her hardest to contribute to the group. she's known to be an amazing fighter and has a gift for making people feel better. rumor has it that caitlyn kiramman once went on a total rampage after losing her mother's expensive necklace. she was a raging asshole for a week, spewing mean things to anyone who stood in her way. vi was out sick for that week, so there was no one to console caitlyn.

when vi returned to school, she called caitlyn "cupcake" one time, causing her to switch sides immediately, reverting back to the sweet girl she's known to be. oh, and vi found the necklace too!

so a team up between a boy genius and a girl with a big heart should be amazing news. however, despite all of their incredible traits, when jayce and vi work together, all of that shit disappears.

they've been paired up together for projects before, and they're the only ones who love this match up. everyone else reacts in horror.

they're always onto absolutely nothing, cooking up plans and ideas that fail so miserably, it's almost impressive. during a lesson on hextech, they had the simple task of using a comically large hammer to aim and hit a target. the hammer was too big for vi to hold alone, so they used the power of friendship to hold it up together. they aimed for the target, and shot a blast.

it completely missed.

in fact, they missed so bad, that it ended up shooting through a window, resulting in it completely shattering. students had to dive for cover from flying glass shards. this prompted a severe tongue lashing from a very angry heimerdinger, who now had to pay for window repairs and do paperwork.

there was another time where they were sparring with some older classmates, got way too into the fight. they were in the middle of hyping each other up when a kid accidentally got in the way of their brawl. they totally knocked him on his ass, the poor thing got sent straight to the ground.

he recovered soon after, but he went home with a bloody nose the day of the impact. jayce was the one who dealt the punch, so he was wracked with guilt for the child he just injured. he sent the family some flowers as an apology, to which the mom responded with dead roses and a note saying: "eat shit".

he is not popular in that family.

knowing you're in for a disaster, you accept your fate, and walk over to a beaming jayce and vi. they are so excited to be partnered up with you, and it would be sweet sight if they weren't, well, them.

"this project is due next class, so please decide on a time outside of school to complete this. we have a lecture to finish," heimerdinger instructs.

vi offers her house, to which you and jayce agree. you're supposed to meet there about four hours from now, which isn't nearly enough time for you to prepare for the bullshit.

here we go.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

four hours later, you're knocking on vi's door, trying to calm your already spiked nerves. it swings open to reveal a small girl with two blue braids.

"hi!" powder exclaims as she wraps you into a tight hug. it's been a while since you've seen vi's little sister, and you're relieved to know that at least one person in this house has sanity.

the two of you catch up for a bit while you wait for vi to bring you upstairs. powder tells you about her little crush on ekko, rambling happily about their adventures while you laugh at their antics.

ten minutes pass and vi still hasn't come down to get you, so now you're annoyed. that annoyance quickly turns into concern as a loud bang from upstairs shakes the entire house.

what the hell?

you and powder rush upstairs to see what the commotion is about. nearly ripping vi's bedroom door off its hinges in fear, you two run inside to make sure everyone's alright.

you look at the scene with disappointment as you see dumb and dumber standing in shock, eyes directed to the damage they just created. there's a giant dent in the floor, no doubt made by the hammer in jayce's hand. vi's giant gauntlets are at her side, which leads you to infer that they were sparring before the impact.

jayce is always doing some type of extreme damage with that hammer, you facepalm as you take in the scene.

you give them both a withering glare then yell at their foolishness.

"you idiots do realize that we're supposed to improve the hextech, not destroy buildings with it, right?"

powder runs downstairs to tell uncle vander what happened, and you sigh in frustration while the other two carefully set their weapons onto the ground.

"sooo...we should get started on the project now, yeah?" jayce offers as his hand rubs the back of his neck, clearly trying to fix the mood.

you let out an exasperated sigh.

"yeah, let's get started."

vi and jayce add another disastrous duo moment to their record. you've lost count of all their failures at this point.

during the entire project, they say stupid ideas or do reckless things. jayce swings the hammer around with zero regard for his surroundings, and laughs whenever vi sticks up her middle finger in the gauntlets. whenever one of them says something that sounds remotely smart, the other one says, "EXACTLYYYYY."

"do you think if we wrap the hammer in foam, we can prevent it from breaking things?" vi asks jayce, who shoots her a look of disbelief.

"you can't be serious," he responds in a critical tone.

you nearly jump for joy as you watch their interaction. for the first time ever, there's hope that one of them will finally be smart in the other one's presence.

"we should wrap it in air pillows, not foam. regardless, that's a great idea! we should test it out," jayce enthuses as he reaches for the hammer.

your hope shatters into a million pieces, just like that window they destroyed.

"no, no, no, no, no!" you interject as you swat his hand away, preventing them from causing more destruction.

"what crawled up your ass today?" jayce asks, offended by your behavior.

"heimerdinger's foot definitely did because you keep screwing up on his exams. don't hate on us because you have a D in this class," vi insults as she completely airs out your business in front of jayce.

jayce yells "OHHHHH" in response, then goes to dap up vi for flaming you. putting your head in your hands, you practice deep breathing so you don't completely lose your shit. it's not your fault that runes and hex crystals are so confusing!

uncle vander stops by shortly after the argument to inspect the damage, loses his mind, then goes to call uncle silco for assistance. you, vi, and jayce continue the project and pretend like vander isn't infuriated with all of you. you didn't even do anything but you still get wrapped up in this mess.

halfway through the project, vi gets a facetime call from caitlyn, to which she immediately responds. if you had a dime for every time vi called her "cupcake", you'd be a millionaire.

things get even more annoying when jayce gets a facetime call from mel, who he also immediately responds to. your friends yap to their girlfriends while you continue working on the project, silently reflecting on how terrible your luck is.

despite their annoying tendencies and horrific performance as a duo, they're somewhat helpful during the project. jayce uses his hextech knowledge to create solid ideas for improving the weapons. the secret to getting him to be his genius self? tell vi she isn't allowed to speak or be in the room while he works. you gave the same rule to jayce when it was vi's turn to contribute, and she actually came up with solid ideas for weapon functionality and protection.

turns out, separating them is a brilliant idea. you mentally pat yourself on the back for your effective plan.

the three of you finish the project and decide to do a movie night in celebration. jayce and vi miraculously land a high five first try, which makes you smile. they then take turns giving you a high five, making your smile wider. the pair gets too confident and tries to do a complicated handshake, which per usual, goes terribly.

jayce accidentally smacks vi (how does this even happen?), and vi punches his arm in return. the two playfully duke it out while you pull out your phone to record them for your private story. you caption the video "mfs when they horrifically fumble a situationship".

when they finish the fight, you realize you can't be their babysitter anymore. desperate to not be stuck with the moron brigade, you ask to invite the rest of the friend group, and vi agrees, complimenting you for coming up with a great idea.

"it's pretty easy to have great ideas when you two are full of terrible ones," powder shouts from the kitchen.

even though vi is taller, older, and arguably stronger, she is always getting destroyed by powder in a verbal battle. it's what makes their dynamic so amazing. vi opens her mouth to shout something back, but you put your hand on her shoulder and shake your head, letting her know it's no use arguing back.

about thirty minutes later, you're sitting in the living room with vi, jayce, mel, caitlyn, ekko, viktor, skylar, elora, powder and her new friend isha, claggor, and milo. you all watch a comedy movie to unwind from the stress of the day, and soon become thoroughly entertained by the movie's ridiculous humor. jayce and vi throw popcorn at each other, which annoys everyone. knowing there was no stopping them, you and mel make a bet on who will win. you choose vi and she chooses jayce like a supportive girlfriend.

mel slides you a crisp five dollar bill halfway through the movie.

as you sit and watch, surrounded by your friends who are full of the happiness and light that they deserve, you decide that maybe a group project with vi and jayce didn't turn out to be such a bad thing after all.

the hangout is full of jokes, silly arguments, laughs, and unbridled joy. even vander and silco stop by to check in on everyone from time to time, smiling at each other as they reminisce about their days as students. whenever those two enter the room, vi and jayce's bodies go rigid with stillness, trying to attract as little attention as possible from the angry set of uncles.

it was an amazing night of bonding with your friends and basking in the comfort of good company. you make a mental note to plan more of these, hoping to give your friends the enjoyment they deserve. when the movie ends, everyone gets off the couches to clean up as they discuss their thoughts on the movie. vi approaches you with a big grin on her face, then has the audacity to deliver the following line:

"this was so fun, the three of us should totally be partners again!"

since you're in such high spirits, you consider giving jayce and vi another chance. maybe they aren't all that disastrous, and maybe, just maybe, they can prove to be a competent duo-

"totally! for our next project we should try seeing how powerful a hextech blast can get! maybe we should go to the park and shoot it into the sky?" jayce schemes while vi's face lights up in excitement at the prospect of another hextech hangout.

never mind, you roll your eyes and mentally chastise yourself for even thinking of giving this another shot. these morons couldn't find a way out of their own asses if they were handed a map.

you fervently shut down their plan before they try making any more.

"absolutely not."

jayce and vi are definitely going down in history as one of the worst duos of all time.

[notmorbid]

all-night pharmacy.

dialogue prompts from all-night pharmacy by ruth madievsky.

you're so alive, it's scary.

being a person doesn't come naturally for me.

what's the deal with this place?

you are my best and my worst friend.

are we horrible people?

i like the idea of having someone to come home to.

i can't tell if you're being cruel or if you're just dumb.

these aren't the decisions of a well-adjusted person.

the less you know about my life, the better.

everyone here is a liar and a cheat.

you deserve to have a life of your own.

a person can't be held responsible for what they don't know.

all relationships are transactional.

no one should have that much power over you.

it isn't too late to come back.

you're uninvited from my birthday party.

i love you, but you're such a cunt.

who do you think you are?

forced intimacy makes me lightheaded.

i know you're in there. let me in.

jesus. why do you have a knife?

what happened last night?

it was less embarrassing to pretend i didn't care.

maybe i'm not the mothering type.

i wish i could carry some of this pain for you.

i need a break from feeling so much all the time.

sometimes i can't tell if i'm asleep or awake.

whatever's going on, we'll figure it out.

i don't know what's wrong with me. i'm scared all the time.

this is the most i can imagine for myself.

if you're not asking yourself 'am i ruining my life?' at least once a day, you're not living at all.

you act like you're over it, but it's okay if you're not.

all my life, i've felt like a dead animal with its skin still on.

it's a virtue to rid yourself of anything that doesn't serve you.

i've never had a day of rest in my life.

i chase after you like a dog, leaving pieces of myself behind, and every time, you act like that's how it's supposed to be.

you don't take me seriously. i'm not a real person to you.

i can't play house anymore.

never say that name in front of me.

to you, other people are always the problem.

you can't reach a mutual understanding without spilling blood.

want to make fifty bucks?

the only way to really see a person is to lose everything you have in common.

you don't think we'll get caught?

our loyalty is to story, not reality.

just don't do anything that could result in a lawsuit or a tmz article, and you're fine.

i don't have the energy to keep up with your antics.

our most beloved delusion was that lying to each other was a kind of love.

speaking our fears aloud won't save us.

one day, the mask slipped. i haven't been able to wear it since.

i try not to think about my life at all.

a junkie can spot another junkie without a flashlight.

your voice reminds me of wool sweaters.

boundaries? i don't know her.

i'm just sick of doing the same goddamn thing every day.

you are obsessed with a projection that will never love you back.

think of me as a spiritually connected friend.

i know liars. you don't strike me as one.

you have iconically poor judgment.

has anyone ever told you about your past lives?

you're capable of tolerating a lot. frankly, more than you should.

friendship can be a slow burn. you don't have to consume it like a drink at last call.

i'll give you a clue. i work for myself.

you make me want to feel things again.

criticism is still a cousin of attention.

you don't have to pretend to like something just because i made it.

i know you crave being told what to do.

you don't have to settle for being a person things happen to.

you have desires. act on them.

bitch, does this look like an intro to philosophy seminar?

i thought i had quit you.

my favorite. how did you know?

i feel like my organs are cannibalizing each other.

how did i get here? that's not a rhetorical question. i'm actually asking.

i can't tell if i believe it, or if i'm making excuses for myself.

sometimes i wonder if it's healthy how much meaning you see in things.

you're always waiting for the universe to hurt you or to love you. usually in that order.

that's how it was in my family. reading the room was a survival skill.

where will all the animals go in the rapture?

a bunch of fuckups under one roof doesn't constitute a family.

my little saint.

time passes more slowly as a sober person.

you'd better not pull away from me now.

there's a russian proverb that goes, 'so much is ruined by saying it aloud'.

you wear your emotions like a name tag.

your resting face frightens me.

how are you both the most innocent and the most experienced person i've ever met?

i need you to just be here with me.

our dead deserve to see you happy.

i like the idea of being marked by you.

i don't know what i saw, but it was more than i wanted.

i know what i saw.

i can't tell which of the memories are real, if any.

i can't believe you're mine.

nobody warned me how terrifying it is to get what you want.

you're cute when you're freaked out.

sex is supposed to be unsettling.

there are things i need to atone for.

you can't go back like it's nothing.

i won't live in service of my dead's vision for me.

___ was a real person. a murder isn't a metaphor.

count five things you can see. four things you can touch. three things you can hear. two things you can smell. one thing you can taste.

banish one god, and you'll end up worshiping another.

i want to be with you, but i don't want to keep feeling like this.

you know everything about me, but you won't let me know you.

you aren't someone i can keep at a distance.

i've been reading about intergenerational curses.

resisting something isn't the same as not wanting it.

anything you say stays between us.

i can't decide if i like you.

most people only possess a third of the empathy they think they have.

will it get easier?

hope is a tricky thing: losing it is bad, but so is having too much.

i don't want the future to come. i have a bad feeling about it.

in cartoons, you don't start falling until you look down.

why are you here? where have you been?

how did you know i'd come looking for you?

you never asked what i was going through. you didn't want to know.

i didn't have the language for what was happening to me.

you were supposed to protect me.

there's a lot i don't remember. a lot i don't want to remember.

i wouldn't have looked for me, either.

we belong to ourselves now.

you know where i am, and i know where you are. maybe that's enough.

when i'm down, vigilante justice makes me feel better.

survival is provisional.

[max--phillips]

Okay here goes

First, the spoiler free stuff:

Ridley Scott knows how to make a fucking film.

If I don’t see fics of Acacius x reader x Lucilla I will begin biting

If you are going in it for Pedro, I will warn you his character is very important but kind of… idk, shallow is too strong of a word, but not very fleshed out. I don’t think that’s an issue in the greater scheme of the movie though, it makes sense in the plot and doesn’t feel out of place or bad in the universe.

If you are going in it for Paul Mescal, you will not be disappointed.

Please watch the first movie first. The story will not make any fucking sense if you don’t.

Just the right amount of flashbacks and footage from the first movie . Chefs kiss

Ridley Scott really said “all emperors and tyrants are nasty little freaks with terrible vibes”

Oh also if you’re squeamish about gore and stuff like. It’s a movie about gladiators so set your expectations accordingly. There is an instance of a disembodied head used as a prop. So y’know

Okay, spoilery stuff below the cut

Arishat was hot :( rip

Monkeys at the beginning? Terrible. 0/10 did not enjoy that. Also did not enjoy seeing and hearing Mr. Mescal BITING ONE

I love Ravi I would watch a whole movie just about him tending to gladiators’ wounds quite frankly. Give me that story

We love to see bisexuality on screen (even though that wasn’t a social identity at the time but we’re not here to talk about that) what with the concubines and drunk as fuck Macrinus

Speaking of drunk as fuck Macrinus: that whole scene was so fucking funny. They’re like that meme about people getting high. You know the one

Speaking of Macrinus—Denzel Washington stole the show. When TIME magazine pushed a story to me today headlined “Gladiator II Belongs to Denzel Washington,” I was like, pshhhh, nah. But it really does. It’s not about him? But it’s his fucking show.

The politics . THE POLITICS

It feels a little heavy handed right now but that wasn’t probably how it was intended, given it was made before. Y’know. The election. But the whole dream of Rome being a place where everyone is equal and cared for but you can only whisper it or it’ll shatter? Yeah.

Oh, right, Acacius: that dude is so tired he does NOT want to be there. Let him go home to his hot wife. Alas, his hot wife is the way she is and like… no good deed goes unpunished.

And I fucking called it with my text post a few months ago. Two (2) movies now where Denzel Washington (either directly or indirectly) kills Pedro Pascal. Brilliant

Admittedly selfishly I would’ve liked to see more of him. But it felt like the correct thing in the context of the story. If he didn’t die then, if he wasn’t the inciting event for the uprising of the people of Rome, it wouldn’t have made sense and it would’ve just been fan service and “look, we got Pedro Pascal!” at that point.

I would’ve liked to see a more in-depth exploration of the change in relationship between Lucius and Lucilla—it seems like they went from Lucius screaming at her to get out to them hugging it out without any real development between the two of them specifically. Obviously a lot had happened in the world of the movie at that point but nonetheless

Macrinus shooting Lucilla was his Icarus moment. There was no coming back from that. “But what about Geta” “but what about Caracalla” no. It was Lucilla. If she’d gotten got by the praetorian guards or something else, it would’ve been fine. But because it was Macrinus there was nowhere he could go from there other than [checks notes] getting his hand chopped off and then gutted in a dirty irrigation ditch.

Remember kids, the people in power who are causing all of the things going wrong in the world have names and addresses and are mortal <3

Also another takeaway from the movie: imperialism, religious extremism, ableism, and authoritarianism will be the end of us all <3

Anyway. Good movie. Can’t wait to watch it again in my own home with subtitles so I can actually like… process everything everyone was saying LMAO and take better reaction notes.

I’m still sitting in the theater parking lot it’s been like 30 minutes LMAO okay thanks for coming to my tedtalk or whatever

[mythalism]

I love everything that you write and I wanted to bring this up with you. I feel like if we had seen the actual moment (at least in one of the regrets) of Mythal’s death, it would have been so impactful. It’s something that Solas talks about constantly and that he feels responsible for and I feel like it would have been a huge moment for the player to see in the story. I dunno. Just ranting. Thoughts?

thank you anon 🥺 i would love to yap about this with you… i think you are totally right that seeing mythal’s death would have been really powerful. i COULD be amenable to an argument that keeping it off screen adds to the drama and tension and the way mythal haunts the narrative…. IF that was their intention… but i don’t think it was lol i think it was probably another victim of the messy development.

mythal so thoroughly haunts the narrative and the lighthouse itself… i think if they leaned into that and we ONLY saw her through solas’s pov in murals, keeping the mystery of her murder off-screen would make sense. but considering we literally get to talk to her, she has enough of an on-screen presence that maintaining that sense of separation is already a lost cause. we also know mythal on some level through flemeth, who has literally ranted about mythal’s death!!! “she was betrayed as i was betrayed”!!!! i think it would have been a nice climax of flemethyal’s arc to see that betrayal or at least hear about it.

i totally agree that it would have humanized solas further and i think that would’ve been nice to see, especially how his complicated grief for her was the catalyst/final straw against the evanuris of the veil going up. he also does actually talk about her murder several times, and we know it happens with THE DAGGER so it feels like it would’ve made sense to elaborate on how it happened more, and the fact that it’s his dagger, that she told him to make, that he used to tranquilize the titans, that he carries with him still, that he is so attached to and obsessed with, THAT DAGGER that did it!? it would have served as a really nice metaphor for his attachment to his grief and regret and the precious world, manifested physically in this dagger that also KILLED MYTHAL (and Varric now too!!)

he actually brings up what im assuming is her death when you ask him about blood magic (lol a lot to unpack here but that’s for another time) and honestly idk what to make of his convo because the way he speaks about it is very detached which i find interesting. obviously this might not be about Mythal but the implication that the dagger used was made via blood magic and sacrifice and “I suppose it depends upon the dagger" is suspicious to me….

anyway, i think who would’ve really benefitted most from us seeing mythal’s murder is ELGAR’NAN!!!!!! HELLO!?!?!? HE MURDERED HIS WIFE AND ITS ONLY MENTIONED ONCE WHEN HE AND SOLAS ARGUE!?!?!?!? WHAT THE FUCK????? the fact that mythal and elgar’nans relationship is nearly nonexistent is one of veilguard’s biggest sins to me. it should have been a huge part of the main story. they are literally THE SUN AND THE MOON. THEY ARE THE ALL MOTHER AND ALL FATHER OF ALL ELVES?????????? and he betrays and murders her and stabs her in the stomach. and literally no one talks about it ever it just doesn’t come up except for like 2 lines. elgarnan was such a one dimensional villain with no motivations (being a naturally evil spirit of tyranny doesn’t count and it’s boring) and no attachments and he feels completely inhuman as a result. like literally he’s just evil and that’s it and it’s so boring. we could have had such an interesting exploration of love and betrayal and how power corrupts and what it must’ve been like to be basically Elven Adam and Eve and a jealous man’s resentment culminating in violence and how mythal’s closeness to solas impacted her relationship with elgarnan like it could have been SO INTERESTING. and yeah. seeing her murder would’ve been a logical conclusion to a lot of build up. put it on the list of things we lost i guess 😔

[jayktoralldaylong]

Alright, there's something I'd like to talk about, and let's come at it with an open mind. When Season one of Arcane ended I was 99% sure that Mel was not going to make it to this season. I was praying for every kind of miracle that could happen just to keep that beautiful goddess on screen but she was the first line of contact for that bomb.

Now that everything has been revealed, I want to talk about that bomb.

Ironically, Season two episode one starts with the exact same shine of gold that ended season one.

See, season one:

Season two:

And when the smoke clears we can see her leaning really close to Jayce, like she got blasted towards him.

Now, looking at the seat arrangements from Season one, I can actually see it a lot better now that I'm taking a second look. We can see that she is standing directly in the line of fire, Jayce is standing to her left and Viktor is sitting in his chair, Jayce's chair. Just about everyone sitting by her right died, Salo is sitting furthest away from the blast, opposite her. He probably saw it just a few seconds before she did.

And when she wakes up, all groggy and out of focus, her hands are on his shoulder. They been there, she did not just put them there, she already had her hands on him. Protecting him.

But what I really want to pay attention to, is the look on Mel's face when she and Jayce take in the damage.

The entire place burned down. Realistically, not a single person should have survived that, especially not unharmed.

Then the damage starts sinking in (Don't look at Jayce, look at Mel):

Look at Mel, as they look around the room of injured Councillors.

Jayce is panicking, full on panicking, he's had his nerves rattled, he's never seen anything like this (unlike Mel who, if the audience remembers, grew up in Noxus). And the sweetest thing is how she follows him around, trying to comfort him, while he's trying to shake Cassandra awake.

And she stays right there by his side, until her mother pulls her away (foreshadowing about their duties pulling them apart perhaps?)

Now, imagine you were in the middle of a disaster, a terrible disaster, and you had the power to save every single person in that room, but you did not know this because no one ever bothered once telling you that you had powers. However, in that moment, you did indeed save one person, without knowing, without even thinking. Who did Mel save?

She saved Jayce. (The craziest thing about that.....is that.... Viktor was literally right beside him. He was right beside Jayce OMG 😭😭).

Watching this scene, I cannot imagine the amount of guilt that threatened to swallow Mel whole ever0y time she saw the aftermath of what happened and a small part of her brain would nag her that she could have prevented it, that she could have protected Jayce's friend.

So why Jayce? Why ONLY Jayce?

"Because she loves him."

Obvious answer, two plus two equals four, but this is Arcane we're talking about, there is more to this simple equation and it is plain to see in their reactions in the aftermath.

Jayce is devastated. He is new to war, he does not know shit about it, it scares him to see all the people that he respects flattened like they are nothing. The Piltover Council means something to Jayce.

To Mel, they are colleagues. They are.... people with names and faces and power. They are people she would help on a normal day, but at the first sign of danger she clung to one person.

Jayce was Viktor's first friend, and he was Mel's too. He was the first person to tell her that she was not crazy. The first person to strangely believe in her dreams, to pour out affection not out of arrogance but genuine care that he was not ashamed or even hesitant to show her. He fought for peace when she began to doubt. When she felt unstable, his naivete and pure heart steadied her.

Mel loved Jayce. Loved him so much that she did not freak out when he was tweaking cause of the Arcane. So much that she fought for him when he was getting outright dominated by his ex. 💀💀 And while it is not the space shattering world changing soul bonded union of javik, I think it is beautiful that Mek loved Jayce.

I think it's ironic that the brotherly love that people keep trying to achieve with Jayce and Viktor was represented so well with Jayce and Mel. I think it's iconic that a male and female character that banged on screen can go their separate ways without a dramatic breakup and without losing the entirety of their care for one another (cause some of it was definitely damaged after their individual trauma).

What I'm trying to say is that Mel loved Jayce. The love was there. Call it romantic or platonic or whatever but she cared about him more than she cared about anyone in that room when that bomb went off.

And it just twists something in my heart....that Jayce was so loved by the two people that meant so much to him. That he gave all of his heart out and they gave everything back because of how selfless his love was. Everyone says Viktor and Mel are out of Jayce's league but they both keep putting him first. (⁠T⁠T⁠) They just cannot resist that all encompassing love of his. It saved Viktor, and it saved Mel who finally found her truth, and lost him to find it.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Skeleton brothers swap bodies for a day.

Undertale Sans - Uh. He's not used to the floor being so far away. Anyway, he's going to sleep. He can tell Papyrus didn't sleep for a few days because he's exhausted. So he's going to do that for him. Hopefully, everything will be normal again when he wakes up from his 18 hours of comatose.

Undertale Papyrus - He got jumpscared by Toriel because he didn't expect her to be so damn tall. And after that, he picked up the sock in the living room. It still counts as Sans doing it, which means he won the sock war. He didn't expect picking the sock to be so intense though. He's already exhausted??? The hell? He did nothing of his day? He tries to drink coffee but somehow it makes it worse. After 10 minutes, Papyrus experiences Sans' narcolepsy and falls asleep on the table lol. Well, that was something.

Underswap Sans - He's so frustrated! He can't properly control those two long legs and keeps tripping on everything. No wonder why his brother can't stand up for long. He is then very quickly overwhelmed by everyone's feelings around him as Honey is born with a rare skill that makes him sense what people are feeling around him. But Blue can't deal with that, there's noise everywhere and it's starting to make him a bit anxious. ... Oh wait. Is this why Honey is so anxious all the time???

Underswap Papyrus - He didn't realize until he went to the bathroom and couldn't reach the mirror. Once he sees he's in Blue's body, Honey freaks out completely. He has no idea what to do about this? How did that even happen? He calls Undyne in utter panic and she manages to understand what the problem is between two sobbing sessions. Except when he went to find his brother... His brother decided to go to work anyway with his body. Honey is having a mental breakdown. He just wants to go back to his own body ;w;

Underfell Sans - .... Oh. He got awaken by his brother, well, himself, and got really confused until he realized he is now big, scary and powerful. A dark evil laugh escapes his throat as he slowly turns towards his brother. Oh boy, he can finally have a little fun.

Underfell Papyrus - Ok, he wanted his brother to help, but Red will obviously not. So Edge gets mad and tries to impress him before he remembers he's not in his body and that he actually looks pathetic and weak. But at least he's short enough to headbutt his brother's pelvis with his now prominent forehead. Red is for sure surprised by this. You think that just because he is small he can't defend himself? Just because you don't know how to use your own body doesn't mean he forgot instantly he's captain of the royal guard dumbass!

Horrortale Sans - He feels dizzy because of his height and his legs and back are making weird creaking noises when he's walking. Oak prefers to stay still, he's a bit worried he's going to break his brother's body at the moment. He's fine just standing there. Except after ten minutes he's not fine standing there anymore because it hurts, but he knows that if he sits down he's not sure he's getting back up. Oak is in distress. Please help ;w;

Horrortale Papyrus - He's so confused about what's going on. It's like his head is evolving in a fog. He can tell he's in his brother's body, but somehow he keeps forgetting it every few minutes or so, and when he tries to talk to his own body, he's even doubting if it's his body or not??? Is this how Oak lives constantly? He has no idea how he does this. That's only an hour and he feels like his head will explode. ... Well, technically it already exploded, but still!

Swapfell Sans - As soon as he sees himself in a mirror, he screams, horrified. OMG he's going to be sick. He gags. He can't be in Rus' body! He did nothing wrong! Why would you hate him that much? He feels so dirty and he smells like trash. And... Is that a 3 years expired opened bag of mustard in his pocket? Nox runs to the bathroom. He needs to take a bath. Oh god, he needs to take at least a 24-hour bath. He's having a mental breakdown lmao.

Swapfell Papyrus - Uh. He doesn't know what he drank last night, but it had to be strong. Oh well. He doesn't care and goes back to sleep. It's nice to have clean sheets in his bed for once. He's hungry though. He searches his pocket and gasps in horror. His limited edition of 3-year-old expired mustard D: Oh no. He jumps out of bed and runs to bang on the bathroom door, begging his brother to not touch his pockets. That's too late lmao. Rus is devastated. That's 3 years of hard work you destroyed your monster! He hates you so much! How could you do that to him! Welll you know what? He's going to his brother's work naked! Yep, he doesn't care anymore. No one can stop him!

Fellswap Gold Sans - ... A closet. He woke up in a closet. What? Wine is so confused, even more because the closet is closed. He starts to think he got kidnapped until he realizes he's a lot more sweaty than usual. ... Oh. Oh! Wait, he has to teleport out? His brother doesn't even open the closet to go in it? That's so lazy! ... Wait, he doesn't know how to teleport? Huh??? Why this thought make him cry? Does he have the emotional stability of a 3-year-old now? Wait, why is he panicking? It's just a closet, it's not a big deal??? Wine is having his first ever panic attack and he doesn't even know why lmao. Please, someone help him, he wants his old cold heartless body back this instant! He bangs on the closet, freaking out, until Coffee, well, himself, opens to him. Wine jumps at his brother's neck and hugs him tight, not sure why he's even doing that. He hates it so much. Please, he needs his body back before he has a second panic attack now.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He was completely freaking out in bed until he realized he could finally wear Wine's dresses without Wine noticing and then he completely forgot he was not in his body. Coffee... might have made a huge mess in Wine's immaculately clean closet. So worth it though, he's hot now. ... Oh wait, Wine! He remembered his brother was locked in his closet and ran to save him. Wine is traumatized because of him. ... Oh wait, did he get his anxiety? Oh yeah, he thought it was weird his mind was so clear this morning. That's not that bad. That's actually cool to have a break from this. He pats his brother's head and tells him that's ok. He can freak out in his closet while he goes out to have some fun with his pretty dress. Coffee is actually so happy of that switch of bodies. He's finally free to do the hell he wants!

[ninthhousedyke]

Arcane Season 2 Final Thoughts (Spoilers)

I adore this series. This series has single handedly filled a hole in my life for media that does everything I have ever wanted: hot women, complex villains, morally grey characters, dynamic and powerful worldbuilding, emotional moments that sit in my chest, animation too powerful to comprehend. I have loved and obsessed over this series for years and I am so sad to see it go. I have been introduced to the world of Runeterra and have fallen down the rabbit hole of League of Legends lore and I am so grateful to the series for introducing me to this new fandom.

That being said, I was let down by episodes 8 and 9 of season two. Episode 9 primarily. These are some thoughts I have based on my watch, but I want to make it clear that I have not rewatched in-depth just yet. These are all preliminary feelings that I had. Overall, I do not find that two poorly executed episodes tarnish the overall quality of this show, which did so much so well, but I do think that dropping the ball on these final episodes will leave a displeasing taste in my mouth about the series going forward. I know the writers were excited to move on to new areas in the world, and I’m excited to see what they do next as I am manifesting Riven in an upcoming Noxus show, but I think they lost sight of how best to wrap up what they were doing in Arcane.

Episode 7 was fantastic, no notes.

Episode 8 had many incredible moments and for the most part was fine. The ending scene with Viktor as the Twenty-One Pilots song plays was jaw-dropping!!! I have opinions on the CaitVi sex scene because I think it could have been done better, but I will write fanfiction about it and everything will be fine. No one wants my whole thesis on that skdhsgd.

I think when Jayce rallies Piltover and Zaun to fight against Viktor and Ambessa, there should have been more discussion on what Zaun gets in return for helping. I think this would have been a good moment for Sevika to get actual fucking lines and negotiate for independence as the price of Zaun’s aid. This would have made her becoming the de facto head of Zaun more explicitly understood, and would have paralleled when Jayce made the initial deal for independence with Silco in season 1.

Episode 9 was just weird. Viktor as the mage that saved Jayce as a kid? No. No that’s not what happened actually. Ekko using time travel but the time travel really not doing anything for the plot? How could you do that to my boy?? Viktor not being evil anymore by the power of homoerotic friendship? I’m sure the JayVik shippers are happy but that’s definitely not it. Maddie as a Noxus spy? Guys you killed her a second later, what was the point of that? We don’t even get an explanation as to what the fuck was up there.

In my opinion, Ambessa and Caitlyn should have had the chance to fight for real. Not when Caitlyn is injured and not with Mel assisting. A genuine duel between these two women in front of the crowd with stakes on the line (maybe Ambessa uses Vi’s life as a bargaining chip?). When Ambessa gets the upper hand and everything is about to go to shit, then Mel steps in and we get mage duel and the death of Ambessa. Followed by the realization Viktor has used this as the distraction to get inside the hex gates. Jayce and Viktor get their epic battle and Jayce kills him, with or without his own sacrifice. I think either option would have been good.

(Side note: full Machine Herald Viktor was jaw-dropping. They ate that shit up for real.)

Rather than Jinx “sacrificing herself” she could simply save Vi from Warwick and they both can mourn together the true loss of Vander. Jinx tells Vi she knows that together all they do is cause each other pain and maybe its best if they go their separate ways. They get a final sister hug and a promise to be there if the other ever needs it. Jinx leaves with Ekko (Timebomb shippers can be happy) and Vi returns to Caitlyn. We end with that beautiful speech from Caitlyn about the stories not being over and the image of everyone’s papers burning off into the sky.

Am I….gonna write an entire fix-it for the last two episodes? Oh God….I’m gonna write an entire fix-it for the last two episodes.

Alright yeah, those are my thoughts. I want to reiterate that this show means the world to me. My current WIP is shamelessly inspired by Arcane and I cannot thank this show enough for everything it has done for me. I think this is a solid 4.5/5 star series, and you can’t get everything right. I don’t blame the writer’s too much; they’re human too.

At the end of the day, this fandom will come together to do exactly what Arcane has told us to do: tell our own stories and make better futures for everyone.

[bardic-tales]

I figured today I would focus on some facts about Bianca that I have been developing recently or over the last few months. They are going to range from romantic to the mundane. Also, there is mention of BDSM practices below.

While Bianca is a demisexual, I also label her as pansexual, too. Bianca does not care what anyone's orientation is. As long as a person developed an emotional bond with her, she could become attracted to them.

Bianca is also demiromantic. She made her living for six years as a romance author. I am a sucker for sticking an author / writer character into my stories.

Both Sephiroth and she are touch-starved, but to varying degrees. Sephiroth is not use to physical contact. When Bianca first hugged him, he was stiff and leaned away from her touch.

However, they do engage in BDSM practices. He is the dominant partner. Bianca would be considered an alpha submissive. She enjoys her bratty role.

Sephiroth will manifest his wing as a sign of dominance when she is too out of line with her brat persona. He has also used his telekinetic abilities to hold her down. This is never down in an abusive way. She consents every time. Sephiroth is the only being she trusts, which is ironic in its own way.

However, one of her 'rewards' is she gets to brush and style his hair. It's a bonding experience between the two. He also likes to brush and braid her hair, placing flower crowns on her head in their dreamscape. This keeps the Hades and Persephone theming of their relationship.

Bianca sees herself as an avenging angel, as well as the self-imposed title 'Priestess of Jenova' to honor Sephiroth and their plans. She harbors a hatred for humanity after everything that happened in her life.

Bianca prefers to wear Sephiroth's clothing when she can. He does NOT mind sharing his clothes, as he sees this as claiming her in a way. She loves to envelop herself in his scent, as she has heightened senses due to her demonic heritage. His scent provides her comfort on those days when her past is just a little too much for her. She boasts that she can smell him 100 miles away. This has lead to a nickname 'his bloodhound'.

Fun fact. I was going to make FWC an isekai in this newest rewrite. I found it funny that with Bianca's reality bending powers that she could have made 'One-Winged Angel' play on the Planet when Sephiroth fought Cloud. There are times when she does play music from her world, but seeing that they are on a different planet, Cloud, Sephiroth, and the rest do not understand the music.

Her favorite music is gothic rock and darkwave, industrial rock and metal, alternative rock, trip-hop, and symphonic metal. As she was teleported onto Gaia in '96, her musical tastes stay stuck in the 90s.

Bianca is 5 foot even. I often head canon Sephiroth to be 6'5". Since she is so much smaller than him, she will often levitate off of her feet to hug him or give him a kiss.

tagging some fellow mutuals: @themaradwrites @littleshopofchaos @serenofroses @megandaisy9 @watermeezer

@nightingaleflow @prehistoric-creatures @creativechaosqueen @chickensarentcheap @glbettwrites

@seastarblue

[atleastpleasetelephone]

Gentle On My Mind - Chapter 7

Initially set in 1967 when Elvis is filming Clambake. Feeling miserable and trapped after the Colonel banishes Larry and the spiritual texts, Elvis invites Gloria to keep him company through the last five days of filming. Gloria is an aspiring movie editor and more importantly she's a lot of fun. Will she be what Elvis needs to get him out of the depressive funk he's in?

Catch up with the other parts here.

Many thanks to @sissylittlefeather being my beta reader on this one.

A/N: We're up to 1968 now...

Pairing: Elvis x OC - Gloria, a budding film editor.

Word count: 5.1K

TWs: Infidelity, p in v sex, fingering, possessive kink, size kink, dirty photos, angst.

Elvis doesn’t say a word on the drive back to the set, and he refuses to let any of the guys help him pack his things, closing the trailer door in their faces angrily. He takes his time putting clothes in bags, staring around the room at everything of hers that’s still there. Part of him is hoping if he does this slowly enough she’ll be back to pick up her things too. He’d spent the whole journey looking desperately for her car in the rear view mirror and not seeing it. But what would be the point? He wonders. Seeing her again wouldn’t change anything. If anything, it would make things worse. 

Picking up the last of his possessions, he suddenly realises he hadn’t ever given Gloria anything. He looks at his hands, but he’s barely wearing any rings, and he doesn’t want to just carelessly take one off for her. She deserves better than that. He scans the room again but there’s nothing. Sitting down on the bed, heavily, he wallows in self-pity. He can’t believe she is the one girl he hasn’t given something to. Even the rose he gave her on the first day she was on set was taken away again by Charlie. How will she remember him now?

***

Gloria walks around the trailer slowly, gathering her things. She’d waited for a long time before driving back from the beach. Partly because it took her a long time to calm down, and partly to avoid running into Elvis again. She wonders who really has the power to drag him away from her like this, she’s not sure that it’s the guy who found them and drove him back. That guy had looked strangely familiar, although she can’t place him now. Once she’s packed she sits on the bed and thinks of all the fun they’d had in this trailer. All the things he’d told her, the tears he’d shed. She can’t believe how sad she feels right now. Sighing, she picks up her bag and heads towards the door. It was just a fling, she tells herself. You’ll be over it in a week or so.

***

A couple of days later the wedding photos are plastered all over the papers. He looks so happy, Gloria starts to wonder if what happened on the beach was just because he felt guilty. Maybe he felt like he should’ve been sad, maybe he felt like she wanted him to make love to her like that. Make love. She shakes her head, trying to knock the words back out of it again. Absolute nonsense. It was just a fling for both of you. This proves it. 

***

“Let’s get rid of them. Come on. Let’s burn them. It’ll be a fresh start for both of us.” 

Elvis holds the books in his hands. It probably is best to put all of this stuff behind him, now Larry is gone. Cilla is probably right. He feels a pang of regret as he throws them, one by one, into the flames. His hand grips the numerology book, immediately thinking of Gloria telling him she was just a foolish impulsive girl and he’d be president someday. He swallows down the lump in his throat. 

“A fresh start,” he repeats, tossing the book into the fire, watching as the edges curl up and then the whole thing is engulfed in flames. “A fresh start together.”

***

It’s the third day of filming in LA for Chautauqua. As usual, Elvis is disappointed by the script. But he doesn’t have many more of these left to make, and at least this is a little different from his usual movies. After the disappointment of Charro! he actually feels okay about it. Plus, he’s just finished wrapping the Singer special and that’s something he’s definitely proud of. Finally finding a way to get back to seeing an audience again, the whites of people’s eyes. He’s still afraid of what people might think when they see it on TV. Does he still have it? But his confidence is back. Sometime soon he’ll be back in front of real audiences again. Just like he told Cilla he wanted. 

He’s making his way to the set for the day when he thinks he hears a familiar giggle. Gloria. He shakes his head. It can’t be her, why would she be…

“Elvis!” Suddenly she’s right in front of him, the same exuberant smile, the same beautiful face. His eyes scan down her body and he notices she’s dressed a little more demurely than the last time he saw her. She grins. “Fancy seeing you here!”

“Well I mean it’s my movie, honey. Think it should be me surprised to see you, not the other way around.”

He kisses her cheek, his hand on her arm. His eyes are sparkling, the blue set off wonderfully against the white suit he’s wearing, and it takes everything in her not to melt there and then. 

“I’m here helping with the editing work,” she explains, trying to control the blush that she’s sure has spread over her cheeks. 

“Oh really? That’s wonderful,” he replies, warmly. 

They both stand there for a while, looking at each other, not sure what to say or do. Eventually Gloria breaks the silence. 

“Congratulations, by the way. On your marriage, and your little girl.”

Elvis’ mouth curls into a lop-sided grin. “Ah, thank you. She sure is the apple of my eye.”

“I’m sure. I um… I have some news too.”

“Oh yeah?” Still smiling. 

“I’m engaged!” She waggles her finger at him, showing off the diamond ring there. “Getting married as soon as this wraps up actually. History repeating.”

His face falls, though he tries hard to recover. ‘Oh… ah… uh… well congratulations. I never thought ya were the marrying type, but uh… guess I was wrong.”

She smiles. “Well, when you find the right person it’s the only thing to do. You know that, of course. You have Priscilla.”

She doesn’t mean it to come out like that, so cold and accusatory, but it does. He nods curtly. 

“Yeah, sure. Anyway, I better go. Needed on set.”

“Good luck!” Gloria replies, brightly, trying to fix what she’d just done. “Break a leg!”

***

They spend the month of filming largely avoiding each other, and being polite when they find themselves in the same place at the same time. Gloria can’t help the feeling when she sees him though, every time her heart leaps and that familiar tingling starts between her legs. She bites her lip and closes her eyes and tries hard to think about her fiance instead. Roger had told her he loved her after three dates. He’d moved in after a month. He bought her pretty gifts every day and told her how he couldn’t live without her. She liked him. Of course she did, maybe she even loved him. But the important part was his devotion to her, which was unquestionable. Everything he did was to make her happy. She’d never experienced anything like it. So when he popped the question, of course she said yes. Then work sent her to LA, and she knew she’d see Elvis again. She’d tried to avoid reading about him, since the day his wedding was in all the papers. Thought that perhaps, over a year later, she’d got over their little fling. She had a man now who wanted her and needed her and provided for her. Once they were married she’d give this job up. But she had wanted to do this last movie, just to see that her feelings were really gone. Of course, they weren’t. 

She knows they’re really not gone the night her and some of the crew crowd around a television set to watch the Singer special. Of course she’s seen him on TV before, when she was much younger, but only once. After all the furore about his wiggling hips her parents put a stop to her watching him, even that awful show where they made him sing to the dog. And she saw him sing on set, when he was filming Clambake. But it’s nothing like this. For a start, he looks so damn good in that leather suit. The sweat is just dripping off him and Gloria can’t help having flashbacks to the time he carried her on his shoulder and then spanked her. But it isn’t just the way he looks, it’s the way he acts. The man she met on the set of Clambake was a shell in comparison to this. She can see he starts off the sit-down part slightly shy, awkward, a little nervous. But by the end, as he sings Memories to two girls on either side of him, that’s all gone. He’s a performer. He’s in his element. 

Her heart is beating so fast by the end of it. She feels like the whole thing was a whirlwind of singing and dancing and him on his knees in that suit, singing like a man possessed. Her brain tells her over and over again to go back to her trailer and touch herself, get it out of her system. But her legs carry her to Elvis’ trailer, and she stands outside looking in. He’s still in his Walter Hale get up, for some reason, but his hat is off and his hair is wild. The guys are all in there, laughing and cheering, all so excited they’ve clearly forgotten to put someone outside as a guard. All the same, she can’t go knocking on the door, not with so many of them about. She notices the guy that came down to get him from the beach that day, Joe? She’d remembered where she knew him from, several weeks after filming had wrapped. It just floated into her head one day. He was the guy at the party who’d told her about the beach. That’s how he knew exactly how to find them when they were gone. 

She walks back to her trailer and tries to make good on her promise to herself of masturbation and then sleep. But she keeps seeing flashes of him from that show, and she knows he’s not far away. And worst of all, she knows he’s still wearing that white suit. She groans. The only thing to do is call Roger. 

“Hi honey, it’s me,” she announces, brightly. 

“Oh… um… hi honey. How come you’re calling so late? Something wrong?” He sounds sleepy. 

She looks at her watch. It is kinda late. “Nothing wrong, just wanted to hear your voice.” Nothing wrong, nothing like I’m only just holding it together not to run into the trailer across the way and fuck Elvis Presley senseless. 

“Well that’s very sweet, but I was just in bed.”

“Oh. Naked?” She asks, hopefully. 

“C’mon Gloria, you know I never sleep naked. And I’m really tired. Let’s just talk tomorrow, can we?”

“Did you uh… did you see that Elvis thing on the TV tonight?” She has no idea why she’s asking this, beyond trying to keep him on the phone. 

“No. Look, honey, I really need my rest. I’ve got work tomorrow.” 

“Okay, sorry. I just missed you, is all.”

“I miss you too Gloria, but it won’t be long before you finish this movie now and then you and I never need to be apart again. Love you.”

And without waiting for her to reply, he puts the phone down. Gloria frowns. He’s usually so much more excited to talk to her than this. He’s probably just tired. It is late. She takes a few deep breaths and tries to stop thinking about Elvis and the sweat pouring off him as he sings. Her hand moves to her belly and the temptation to touch herself thinking about him gets even worse. She pours herself a drink and puts a record on. Think about something else. Anything else. 

Three drinks later and all remaining sensible thoughts are gone. She pulls a fur coat and her boots on and walks out of her trailer towards his. It’s much quieter than before and the blinds are down so she can’t see inside this time. Crossing her fingers that he’s alone, she knocks on the door. It’s a while before he finally appears, looking slightly dishevelled, raking his hair back from his face. He’s shocked to see her. 

“Glory.”

“Can I come in?”

He nods and opens the door wide for her, feeling her brush past him in the small doorway. Closing it before turning to face her. 

“You okay?” He asks, tentatively. 

She shakes her head. “No,” she replies, and before he has a chance to ask why her arms are around his neck and her tongue is in his mouth. 

He pulls her towards him with his big hands, holding her body tightly. “Shit,” he mutters, as they come up for air. “Thought ya were gettin’ married?”

She shakes her head in a way that tells him not to talk about that. Her eyes trail over his body in the white suit of Walter Hale and she tries hard not to moan audibly. 

“I watched the special,” she manages to get out before he kisses her again. 

“What d’ya think?” He asks, his breath hot on her cheek, trailing kisses from the corner of her mouth down her neck. 

“Fuck me.” 

He giggles into her ear. “That good, huh?”

“I really wanna tell you about it…” she breathes. “But first I really need you to fuck me with that big dick.”

“Oh God, I’ve missed that filthy mouth of yours.”

She giggles and they stand there for a moment, just looking into one another’s eyes. He’s missed more than just her filthy mouth. This energy, this joy. He’s missed her terribly. 

“Can you keep the suit on, though?”

He blinks. “What? The whole thing? Wardrobe will be mad with me if we mess it up…”

“Will they? Do you need to wear it again?” Her head is tilted to the side and she’s smirking at him. 

He can’t help smirking back. “Okay, fine. I don’t care. You want me to leave it on, I’ll leave it on.”

She bites her lip. “The jacket can go,” pushing it off his shoulders. “And we don’t need this tie,” undoing it and throwing it on the floor. “But the rest can stay.”

“What about the hat?” He asks, picking it up from the table he’d left it on earlier. 

She giggles, remembering that first night in his trailer when he’d put on a hat and a jacket and pretended to be her boss. “Put it on, let’s have a look.”

He grins, putting it on his head and then spotting a cigar on the table and putting that between his teeth too. “Ya like Walter, do ya baby?”

Giggling and nodding. “You gonna smoke that while you fuck me?”

“If you want me to.”

“I want you to.”

“C’mere,” he pushes her coat off her shoulders then picks her up in his arms and carries her over to the bed, putting her down carefully. She kicks off her boots.

Catching a glimpse of the long mirror on the closet door out of the corner of his eye, he suddenly has an idea he’s sure she’ll like. 

“You wanna watch yourself?” Nodding at the mirror. 

Gloria can hardly believe her ears. “Are you… okay?” She asks, but she doesn’t really want an answer. She likes him like this.

Elvis laughs, pulling her back up from the bed again and standing her in front of the mirror, his arms around her waist. He kisses her neck, cigar back in his hand for a moment.

“This way you can see me in this suit you like so much. And you can see yourself, getting fucked by my big dick.”

His hand moves down between her legs and squeezes. She hums with pleasure, grinning at his reflection. “I’d like that, big boy.” 

He pulls a lighter out of his pocket, lighting the cigar and puffing out a cloud of smoke around her. She can’t help giggling, until he unzips her pants and slides his hand into her panties. She gasps as his fingers touch her pussy and he presses more hot kisses to her neck. Roger never touches her like this.

“I don’t like it when girls wear pants, baby,” he tells her, teeth grazing her earlobe. 

“I better take them off then,” she replies, quickly reaching to shimmy them off. 

He grins. “Might as well take it all off,” he suggests, stepping back to take another drag of the cigar and look at her from behind and then at her reflection again. 

Gloria’s heart races at the idea of her being completely naked, in front of a mirror, and him behind her still wearing all his clothes. That TV special has certainly done something for his confidence levels, she thinks. She unbuttons her blouse and tosses it onto the floor, unhooking her bra and removing that too, so she’s just in her panties and socks. She looks back at his reflection in the mirror. 

He smirks around the cigar. “All of it, honey.”

She does as he asks, standing naked in front of the mirror. He takes the cigar out of his mouth so he can kiss her shoulder. 

“You’ve got a beautiful body, Glory. I missed it.”

“I missed your big dick.”

They both giggle, Elvis pulling her back against him. He slides his fingers back between her legs and starts to rub slow circles around her clit. 

“Your fiance…” he murmurs, close to her ear. 

“Average-sized,” she replies, quickly, panting a little at the pleasure building already. 

She knows it won’t be long before he makes her come, she’s so het up already.

“Mmm. That’s a shame, baby.”

“He’s nothing… like you,” she moans. 

Elvis smirks, taking another drag on his cigar as his fingers speed up their movements, watching her face in the mirror. 

“Come for me, Glory.”

She whimpers, tipping her head back and exposing her throat for his kisses. Her legs shake as the pleasure builds and builds and then finally reaches that wonderful crescendo. Moaning, her back arching, her head flopping onto his shoulder. 

“Mmmm. Good girl.”

She breathes hard, chest heaving, body tingling all over. He holds her for a few moments and then kisses her cheek. 

“Fuck. Elvis. That was so good.”

“Better than anything you’ve had lately?” His breath hot against her ear. 

She laughs, and elbows him in the side. “Stop that.”

“Okay, okay.” He runs his fingers down her sides gently. “How about you lean forward and put your hands on the closet… and spread your legs.”

“Something has happened to you since I saw you last,” she says, leaning forward and putting her hands on either side of the mirror.

He looks down at her ass and gives it a gentle slap, grinning as he grips his cigar between his teeth and unzips his pants, his dick standing to attention as soon as he releases it from the underpants he’d been forced to wear with the suit. Slowly starting to push inside her, he groans at how tight she is. Pulling her against him when he bottoms out, his mouth next to her ear again. 

“You’re so tight, Glory. Don’t think this man of yours can be giving you everything you need, hm?”

Gloria’s head spins. She loves Roger. Loves him. But the things Elvis is saying are turning her on so much. And he’s so good at this. 

“Hm?” He repeats, pulling back and thrusting into her, hard. 

She whimpers as he lets her body go and she falls against the mirror, looking at her own reflection smudged against the glass. He obviously wants an answer. 

“No…” she breathes, trying to get her hands back on the closet before he thrusts inside her again. 

“You like this?” He asks, starting to pick up a steady pace now, holding her hair to arch her back. “You like being fucked with this big dick?”

“Yes… Mr Presley…”

Smoke billows from his cigar as he continues to pound her pussy, watching his dick disappear into her over and over again, and then looking at her flushed, beautiful face in the mirror. She groans at the intensity of the feeling, knowing her second orgasm is coming soon. The sex was so good before, but this is unbelievable. She loves him being so dominant. 

He can feel her pussy clenching around him and it spurs him on to fuck her harder, knowing she must be getting close again. 

“Gonna come for me again?” He murmurs, mouth still around the cigar. 

“Yes… ohhhh…” she moans, feeling him hit that place inside her again and again. 

“Tell me I’m the best you’ve ever had.”

Her eyes go wide at his words, hands sliding onto the glass of the mirror, making it hard for her to stay upright. She manages to mumble, “mmm.”

“I wanna hear you say it,” he repeats. 

His impending orgasm is making him feel a little crazy, like he somehow wants to get one over on this guy who’s stealing his girl. His Glory. 

“You’re… the best… I’ve ever… had…” she pants, and then falls forward, her face against the mirror as he keeps going, relentless, fucking her like a man possessed. 

Her orgasm crashes into her with such force she almost screams, her walls squeezing him over and over as he continues to thrust. He moans and slams his palm against the closet as he comes deep inside her. Slowly, weakly pumping his hips a few more times and then falling against her fully. 

“Fuck me,” she says quietly, from between him and the closet mirror. “One TV special and you just think you’re God’s gift all of a sudden.” 

“Oh… ah… honey I-I…” he stammers, until he sees her face in the mirror, grinning at him. Realising she’s teasing. “Oh, you’re naughty.” 

He stands up and pulls her against him, his arms around her waist, growling into her ear. She giggles and squirms, but she’s enjoying the feeling of him still gradually softening inside her. He stops abruptly as he looks at the floor. 

“Ah. Shit.” Letting her go so he can pick up the cigar that is burning a hole in the carpet. 

She turns around and laughs. “Oh my God. Let’s try not to set the trailer on fire.” 

She admires him in the suit again as he puts the cigar out safely in an ashtray. But she wants to see his body now. 

“Let's get you out of this.” Her fingers undoing the buttons of his waistcoat. 

He smiles and lets her take his clothes off, feeling so much happier about his body now he’s lost that bit of extra weight. She stops to look at him once he’s naked, her hands exploring every inch of his skin as she follows her fingers with kisses. He’s lost the squishiness around his middle, and she’s almost sad about it. He’s so slight without clothes on, she wonders if he’s been eating enough. 

He’s still bashful though, laughing and blushing and asking her if she’s finished yet as she kneels down in front of him and runs her fingers down his legs. She giggles back, looking up at him through her lashes, wondering herself what on earth she’s doing. But she can’t stop, she even kisses his toes. She wants to touch every bit of him. His breathing is uneven as he stares down at her. No woman has ever done anything like this to him. She stands up again slowly and he takes her hand in his and leads her to the bed. They get under the covers and then just stare at one another, him absent-mindedly stroking her cheek as she runs her fingers through his hair. 

“So, what did ya think of the Special, then?” He finally asks. 

She grins. “Incredible. You were amazing. I’ve never seen you move like that before. And the songs… I loved the whole thing. You must be proud.”

He smiles a little. He supposes he is. “Yeah. I’m really proud of the way it turned out. The Colonel wanted a Christmas special, but Steve really stood up to him.”

“A Christmas special?”

“Yeah, he wanted snowmen and presents and me in a Christmas sweater…”

Gloria giggles. “Oh well I’m sure you would’ve looked cute, but… I mean that suit…” 

“You liked it?”

She puts her hand on his face, gently moving his hair back from his forehead. Some things hadn’t changed about him. He still needed constant reassurance. 

“Obviously I liked it, it was tight and it made you sweat.”

He laughs, and she thinks about how pronounced his cheekbones are now. 

“You think I look better than I did when I saw you last?” He asks, almost shyly. 

“I think you’re just fishing for compliments now,” she teases, her arm around him and her leg between his. 

“Well I think you look real good Glory,” he tells her, pulling her tightly against him and kissing her neck again. “Thought ya might want to compliment me back.”

She laughs, rolling him onto his back and biting his neck. “I told you how good you looked already. You’re so needy.”

He growls, easily overpowering her and rolling on top of her. “I’ve been dieting. And I love food. C’mon.”

He leans down and starts nibbling on her collarbone, making her giggle. “Don’t eat me!”

“No?” He raises an eyebrow and smirks. 

She shoves his chest, laughing, and pushes him back off her again. They tussle back and forth for a while, giggling until they’re both out of breath. 

“You looked good when we met and you look good now. I love you no matter how you look.” 

The words are out of her mouth before she notices the inclusion of the word love. She buries her head in his chest, wondering what to do next. Does she love him? Well, she certainly just said she does. Does he love her? He has a wife. 

Elvis looks down at her, stroking her hair gently. “I love you too, Glory.”

It doesn’t matter whether we love one another, she thinks. That’s irrelevant. She looks up, slowly. “Elvis, I’m getting married.”

“You don’t have ta.”

Gloria swallows, hard. “But you’re already married. And I want to… I… I’m going to marry Roger.”

“His name is Roger?” Elvis is struggling not to smirk. 

“Stop it!” She shoves him again, laughing. 

“He’s not going to satisfy you, Glory.”

“And neither are you, Elvis. You’re married and you have a baby, and a career. And I… can’t wait around for my own family.”

Elvis sighs. “Cilla and I aren’t… I mean, we don’t sleep together anymore…”

Gloria shakes her head. “I don’t want to hear this. I don’t… I’m getting married and that’s all there is to it.” She pauses for a moment. “But I’ll stay here tonight if you want me to.”

“Of course I want you to.”

Elvis feels jealousy coursing through his veins, the urge to find this Roger and tell him to call it off with her is huge and he wants to demand to know her address so he can go right now. He tries to swallow it all down. Maybe she’ll change her mind if she stays tonight. Surely he can persuade her if she stays in his trailer for the next week or so, until filming wraps. There’s no way they’re going to be able to stay apart now.

They spend the rest of the night talking, rather than sleeping, and several hours in Elvis remembers something he’d brought with him to set. He pulls out a polaroid camera, it’s big and expensive and it produces photographs immediately. Gloria’s eyes light up when he explains the concept to her. 

“Can I take some of you, honey?” He asks. 

She grins. “Dirty photos?”

He blushes, a little of the old insecurity back. “Well, only if ya want to…”

“Of course I want to! You fucked me in front of a mirror with your Walter Hale outfit on. Obviously I wanna do filthy stuff.”

He takes a few photos of her face, and then she starts to pose like a pin up girl so he takes photos of her like that. Then she starts to pose like the centrefold of a dirty mag and he takes some of her like that, too. He finds himself between her legs, taking a shot of her pussy and barely even blushing. After a while she holds her hands out. 

“C’mon. I want some of you.”

He looks a little uncomfortable, so she gets up and grabs his white hat and another cigar. 

“Here. Let me have one with you like this.”

She lies back on the bed and takes a photo of him leaning over her, smirking around the cigar. 

“That better just be my face.”

“That one was,” she replies, gesturing for him to lie on his back and getting up on her knees to take another. “But this one definitely isn’t.”

He grabs her waist and pulls her on top of him, and it’s all she can do to avoid hitting him with the camera. “Let’s see.”

They tussle again for a while and then sit up, looking through the photos. He tries to tell her she can’t keep the photo of his dick but she just giggles and tells him she’ll keep it from falling into the wrong hands. Eventually they fall asleep in one another’s arms. 

Gloria wakes up after only a couple of hours of sleep and looks at her watch. 6am. He’ll be awake in an hour or so to start filming again. She looks at him sleeping peacefully next to her. Then she looks at the photos again and smiles. Slips them into her handbag and gets dressed quietly. She can’t stay here. Can’t stay on set. She’ll just end up in his bed every night and then what will happen with her and Roger? Elvis will never commit to her like Roger has. She sighs, pulling on her boots and coat. 

She can’t wake him up or he’ll just beg her to stay. But she feels funny about leaving without saying anything too. She looks around briefly for a pen, and when she can’t find one she takes her lipstick out of her bag. Applying it to her lips she picks up one of the pin-up style photos he’d taken of her and presses a kiss to it. Turning it over she scrawls on the back. 

“Sorry big boy. You know I love you. Glory xx”

Quietly slipping out of the trailer she thinks she will probably never see him in person again. She sighs. Well, they’d at least had some fun.

***

Taglist:

Please let me know if you want to be added or removed:

@vintagepresley @arg-xoxo @from-memphis-with-love @msamarican @blursedblegh @returntopresley @eapep @everythingelvispresley @i-r-i-n-a-a @sissylittlefeather @arrolyn1114 @jhoneybees @cattcb @polksaladava @lookingforrainbows @jkdaddy01 @ccab @epthedream69 @lustnhim @elvisslut @pomtherine @that-hotdog @ladelinee @angschrof @fairybloodsucker @deltafalax @makethemorning @elviswhore69 @ilovequeen978 @wildhorseinkansas