#and then I'm going to *gets tackled again*

[feasibilities]

Mrs. Muckraker | Thomas Shelby x Author!Reader ✍︎

✍︎ Synopsis: Your controversial writings catch the attention of local kingpin, Thomas Shelby. ✍︎ Warnings: Hatefuck, Dub-Con, Spanking, Manhandling, Period-Typical Sexism, Blackmail, Manipulation, Veiled Threats, Slurs, Shame ✍︎ Author's Note: My first full-length fic of 2025. I'm trying to tackle darker themes. Enjoy!

Your tendentious writings are causing a stir in the literary world, especially in Birmingham. You tackled hot-button topics like corruption, misogyny, crime, sexuality and more. Against the advice of your publisher, you refused to use a pen name to protect your identity. This led to a myriad of angry letters from local priests, husbands with shaky marriages, and stuffy bureaucrats like Inspector Campbell. You had also caught the attention of the Thomas Shelby, the patriarch of the family and leader of the Peaky Blinders. 

Against your instincts, you decided to spend an evening at the Garrison. You were surprised to see it empty with the exception of a few drunkards. After ordering a glass of whiskey, you saw Thomas emerge from the meeting room with a stern expression. Harry wordlessly poured him a glass of gin while you rolled your eyes at his acquiescence. Taking note of your irritation, Thomas sat next to you. 

“The Virginia Woolf of Birmingham, eh?” He teased. 

“I’m surprised someone like you knows who she is.” You retorted, sipping your whiskey. 

“Do tell, who am I?” He asked with a pompous tone.

“A witless cunt.” You criticized. 

“Very creative, sweetheart.” He praised sarcastically. 

“I am not your fucking sweetheart.” You shot back. 

“I suppose so. I thought you would be sweeter.” He purred, touching your hand. You snatched it away. His chuckling angered you even more. 

“Fuck off. I’m taking this to go, Harry.” You declared, walking to the door with the glass. 

“Before you leave, I have a preposition for you.” He said. You continued out of the pub without another word. 

—

The next morning, you found refuge at a local tea room. Your peace was swiftly interrupted by the crook you met the night before. 

“Nice to see you again.” He spoke, lighting a cigarette and sitting at the table. 

“Is this the only tea room in town?” You huffed.

“I’m a regular here, dove.” He replied, smoke ghosting in front of his mouth. 

“Fucking any woman that comes through the door doesn’t make you a regular.” You sniped. 

“I’ll take that as the compliment it was meant to be. I have news for you.” He said. 

“What news?” You complained. 

“Shelby Company Limited is willing to publish your next novel at a far better percentage than your current publisher.” He declared, handing you a copy of your contract with Orchid Publishing. You felt ill at what he could’ve done to get such a private document. 

“I’m not interested in anything under the table. Your intimidation tactics won’t work on me.” You said, handing it back. 

“Of course. I’m confident that you’ll sort everything out once you’re dropped due to public outcry and a ‘firm recommendation’ from Inspector Campbell.” He revealed, tapping the ash of his cigarette. You were almost impressed by his business acumen but refused to compliment him. Thomas saw the wheels turning and decided to take advantage of the opportunity. 

“If you’d like to discuss this further, I’ll be hosting a dinner for the Shelby Foundation. I would hate to see talent like yours go to waste.” He stated, pulling a golden envelope from his suit pocket. He sat it on the table and stared at you intently. You kept eye contact with him as you took the envelope in your hands. 

“I’ll let you know of my decision at the dinner.” You said plainly, standing up. He gave an affirmative nod as he watched you leave. 

Thomas provoked your ire like no other. His need to dominate every industry that came through Birmingham was close to swallowing you whole. You feared that your writings would be diluted under the authority of Shelby Company Limited. The wrong decision could end your career as you know it.

Arriving at the foundation dinner, your dress earned concupiscent gazes from male attendees and glares from their wives. You hurriedly took a glass of champagne from a nearby waiter’s tray. Dread wore on your face as you pondered the inevitable. 

“You clean up well.” A gruff voice whispered behind you. You were ready to elbow the man in the face until you realized it was Thomas. He circled you like prey while admiring your beauty. 

“For me?” He said arrogantly. 

“No, the invitation said formal. Don’t be so proud of yourself.” You replied, sipping from the flute. 

“Sure.” He said, looking you up and down once more. You felt butterflies in your stomach. A longtime colleague of his stopping by seemed to embolden his peacocking. You became an awkward background character to their lively conversation until his colleague recognized you. 

“She’s the spinster keeping up trouble in Small Heath?” He realized. You finally came to as you heard the insult. 

“She is but she’ll be an ally of ours soon, eh?” He smiled, placing a patronizing hand on your shoulder. You snatched his hand away and smashed the half-full flute on the floor

“Stupid fucking Birmingham scum, the both of you! You’re nothing but a stupid gypsy bastard with nothing to speak for but the money you’ve taken out of our pockets!” You shouted, causing the party to go silent. Thomas retreated into an aggrieved, icy quiet as the humiliation soaked in. Exasperated, you tilted your head waiting for a response. The partygoers, including his colleague, grew nervous at what could happen next.

“I’ll have to excuse myself. Carry on everyone.” He announced, walking to his study. Whispers traveled like a virus through the attendees as they were stunned at his allowance of your vituperative attack. Soon after, the festivities resumed while you were smoked a cigarette outside. As much as you hated it, you worried that you might’ve bruised his ego this time. You were also worried that you signed your death warrant as he was the most feared man in town. Sneaking past nosy attendees, you found the door of his study. You knocked and waited for an answer.

“Come in.” He said. You came in and stood at his desk. Before you could speak, Thomas began reading a scathing excerpt from your latest novel. 

“The Peaky Blinders can be compared to a family of plague rats. Spreading disease, death, and degeneracy wherever they end up. Thomas is the captain of a sinking ship and has no qualms about leaving his crew behind if they grow lame or impotent.” He read the excerpt as if it was a bedtime story. 

“I came to apologize and-“ You started before being cut off once more. 

“Thomas seems to think he can fuck and drink his way into being elected MP. This region has truly gone to shit if he is ever elected.” He read another excerpt. This time, you stayed silent to avoid any interruptions. He removed his glasses and sat back in his chair. 

“You forgot to notify me of your decision.” He said with an eerily calm tone. 

“I haven’t made one yet. I just came to apologize.” You said, trying to gauge his anger. 

“For what? The gypsy bastard part or the degeneracy commentary?” He said, feigning confusion. 

“For all of it, I suppose.” You relented, feeling deep shame. 

“Oh, no. Don’t apologize for speaking the truth.” He pushed back, standing up and walking to you.

“What?” You asked. 

“I’m pleased to let you know that I’m everything you said I am. A gypsy bastard. A drunk. A pest. An enjoyer of women. Now, what is your decision?” He heralded.

“I..can’t work with you. I would forego my morals.” You rejected. 

“Why not? A man like me would be great print.” He implored, walking closer. With each step he took forward, you took a step back. 

“The answer is no. I apologize for the outburst and I won’t write of you again.” You concluded, reaching for the doorknob. Suddenly, you were slammed against the wall with a painful grip on your face.

“The truth is that you need someone like me. Someone to keep you in line.” He threatened, eyes boring into yours. Your attempts to escape were hopeless as he relished in your panic.

“Let me show you something.” He whispered, slipping his other hand in the top of your dress. His hand stalled at your chest. Your heart jackhammered against his warm palm. 

“Feel that?” He asked. You nodded as you pulled your dress off your shoulders and moved his hand to your breast. Finally, you two kissed with a burning hatred for each other. You two yanked away each other’s clothing with such disdain. You found yourself bent over the cool mahogany of Thomas’ desk. You lifted your head to insult him before your head was roughly pressed back down. 

“Be a dear and stay still.” He said with condescension.

“Fuck you.” You spat, trying your best to hide your lust. He groped the soft flesh of your ass before landing a series of harsh smacks. Each slap evoked a wanton mewl from you. He went back to massage the tender flesh to vex you even more.

“Let’s make this quick…” He huffed as he plunged inside of you. Your back arched and another lecherous noise left you at the sensation. Soon after, your body began to lurch forward with his merciless thrusts. Your hands searched for purchase on the hard surface. Noise barely escaped your open mouth as the air was expelled from your lungs. Restrained groans came from Thomas while bruises formed on your hips. The stress of pleasure in your abdomen finally broke like an overextended rubber band. He watched as your body violently convulsed with rapture. When you finally came to, he kissed the back of your head. 

“You should get dressed.” He said coldly, slipping on his dress shirt. With shaky legs, you haphazardly dressed yourself. His lack of affection stung but you understood that it was his intention. 

“Hey, sign this before you go.” He said, handing you a pen and pointing to the empty line on the contract. 

[prettieinpink]

CONFRONT, PROCESS, HEAL ♡ྀི

For everyone who has goals for 2025 to heal <3 This post is very general, so even if you think it won’t apply to you, I would still recommend skimming through it to see if anything stands out! This is a vv long post :) like 2.5k words so beware, and feel free to ask or debate anything

CONFRONTING 

TAKE A MOMENT. In the heat of the moment, it can be difficult to regulate our emotions, in which it's harder for us to process what is the right thing to do. Confronting problems with overwhelming feelings, will most likely lead to us doing the less than ideal action. 

So whenever you are in a position in which your emotions are getting the best of you, fully distract yourself. Do whatever you want, as long as it just shuts your brain off. 

Then when you have cooled down, you don’t have to tackle it right away. I find that will just bring them back up to the surface again. Go at your own pace and when you are comfortable starting to process everything. 

IDENTIFY EVERYTHING. When a lot of people say this, they mean naming your emotion and what's happened to you. I think that's a very close-minded perspective, and in order to comfortably heal, we need to be aware of all factors that may have contributed to what has happened. 

For example, consider the environment, your upbringing, their upbringing, your actions, their (possible) thoughts, your attributes, their attributes etc. I know I'm a big person for not obsessing over people as it just takes away energy from what you could be putting back into yourself, but this isn't an obsession. This is you stepping away from everything and looking at the situation with a third person perspective. 

ACKNOWLEDGE IT. Another thing is that you have to acknowledge that this is your reality. I know a lot of us struggle with this, as when we’re faced with reality, we escape. Through various methods like maladaptive day-dream or just subconsciously blocking out the memories from our mind. It's okay for you to have a big reaction to it, but I definitely discourage downplaying it or ignoring it. 

Part of acknowledging is understanding that in some way or form, you will have to look back on whatever happened in order to truly get past it.

I also struggled with this, when I sit myself down, and I'm like, ‘this is the life that I’m living’, at that point you kind of realise that constantly escaping instead of acknowledging will do more harm than good. I'm saying this because the self improvement community sometimes encourages ‘ignoring’ everyone and everything which doesn’t go your way, which I don’t believe is good for your emotional health at all. Those emotions from those experiences will eventually catch up to you if you’re constantly running away from them. 

GAIN CLOSURE. If you happen to be in a situation in which it's appropriate to reach out to people who you just don’t understand their actions or what happened, then do it. Getting that closure makes it easier to let go of the situation.

If your circumstances are more complicated than that, I would roleplay. It sounds so weird, but it is just as effective. There are two ways you could go around this, the first method would be asking a friend to be xyz. It helps if they are someone who knows a lot about this situation. 

If you don’t feel comfortable telling someone all this, or maybe you don’t have someone to roleplay with, you could use chat GPT. Tell it your situation, the kind of people involved, their personalities and any other relevant information. I am anti-chat gpt, but I feel like the usage of it in this situation is for good. 

ACCOUNTABILITY. Even if you feel like you are the most perfect human being ever, its quite possible that you may have unknowingly or unwillingly played a hand in whatever happened to you. Of course, this will not apply to all situations. 

It doesn’t even have to be accountable for others’ people's actions. It can be accountability to yourself e.g ‘I saw the signs that xyz would do this, but I ignored it’ or ‘I’m sorry to myself because I allowed them to disrespect me’ or ‘My actions may have compelled them to act that way towards me’.  Accountability is a two way street. 

PROCESSING 

EVALUATE. Now that we’ve identified everything and hopefully gained some closure, evaluate the whole situation. You can do a video diary, journal or talk to a friend about it. Since everyone’s situation is going to be so different from each other, I can’t really give much advice about it. 

However, I would say, go really deep. Like, it has to be questions which make you uncomfortable to answer. If they’re too easy to answer (especially without deep thought), then you’re not digging as deep as you could go. Here’s some questions to get you started! Please do tweak where needed, as I did make these to be very general. 

Was this situation a reflection of my upbringing? If so, how are the two connected?

Were the perpetrator(s) doing this out of pure immorality, or could there be other factors that may have contributed to them doing it? 

Was I in a position in which I could’ve avoided or de-escalated the situation? Were there signs that this would happen?

Have I not healed completely from any situations in the past, and my pain from that made me carry on the same behaviours? 

Is this an emotion or situation which I’ve been avoiding? If so, why?

What would forgiveness for people who have wronged me look like? 

Did I or my community handle the situation ideally? What differences could have been made? Would those differences really would’ve affected the outcome of the situation?

Has this situation affected your thinking process, specifically when being in new environments or around new people? 

These questions are not a one-size fits all, so once again, tweak to your liking. If you would like more personalised questions, I would go to chat GPT. 

MOURN. This is your time to wail, scream, go absolutely crazy because whatever happened, still affected you. Everyone’s mourning will look different, and their reasons why will be a lot more diverse. 

I would recommend doing an activity that is high energy. I don’t mean physical activity, so if writing poems angrily is what lets you get that steam out of your system, I fully support it. And, there is no time limit whatsoever. Of course, I encourage you at one point to pick yourself up, but if months is what you need, months is what you shall get. 

Quick little disclaimer, please don’t do anything crazy that will harm you. Like overworking yourself physically, binging, not eating enough meals, lashing out at everyone etc. While it is a period to mourn, do it in a way that is actually beneficial to you. 

SOLUTION. Just because a situation or problem is ‘over’ doesn’t mean it's been solved. While this may not apply to many problems, I think some people need to hear this: You need to make the best of what you have. I know it seems so unfair that xyz has happened to you, and there is no worse feeling when you see people who’ve wronged you thrive in life or you imagine who/what you could’ve been if xyz didn’t happen to you. 

However, you have your options. You absolutely have to make the best of what you’ve got instead of dwelling on could’ve or what ifs. A solution to whatever will not be a one size fits all. For some people, it may be applying to a new skill class, having that one difficult conversation, finally going to therapy or maybe saving up money for anything that will help. I would define a solution in this instance as anything that creates or supports long-term and permanent growth to most areas of life. 

I used the word growth specifically because a lot of solutions to your problem(s)are not easy. It may feel uncomfortable, but that's why we call it growth. This journey will absolutely not be linear, and the easy way out may not be the best way out. 

For example, I really want to move schools. I’ve been in the same school since year 2, and I feel like this environment may have stunted the growth of who I could’ve been. The easy solution would’ve been to move schools, but my parents are kind of blocking that. Instead, I decided to look for new areas to grow. For example, my blog! I also put in a lot of effort into my academics at this school, because I know that I would love to study abroad and that's another solution. Another solution for me could also be joining a new club. You see where I'm going with this? 

OUTCOME. Something which I wished that someone had told me way earlier, is to ask yourself, what is the ideal outcome after you get past this? You may be like, isn’t that like what everyone says? But what nobody actually says is that your outcome will may be far from ideal. 

A part of this journey is understanding that this situation will always be a part of you, regardless of how much or little it has shaped you today. A toxic belief that I had, is when I would get past it, I would be unstoppable. I would know exactly what to do, in whatever situation, and whenever I revisit it, I never feel anything. This is so detached from reality, and a huge part of processing everything, is to understand what you want to achieve. 

I feel like the reason why I believed I would be unstoppable, is because youtubers etc really love to promote that as soon as you turn around your mindset, you’re good to go. You will never have to suffer again in life, because your mindset is so ‘good’. Your mindset could be so polished and it could actually not bother you at all, but your body will keep the score. 

You are not going for perfection, you are aiming for progress. Here are some ideas for goals/outcomes you want to achieve, feel free to tweak, choose multiple, or add more. 

Reclaim what trauma has taken back from you. 

Recover your self esteem, hope, or ability to connect with other people. 

Process whatever that has happened so that It doesn’t haunt you.

Releasing yourself out of survival mode. 

Develop healthy coping mechanisms. 

HEALING

CREATE A SUPPORT SYSTEM. Your support system will consist of people who you can trust to be vulnerable around. They will help you get through it, and will almost be like your second brain which you can use from time to time. Since they didn’t experience themselves (or maybe they did), they could offer new perspectives or advice that you wouldn’t consider due to the impact on you. 

If you are someone who doesn’t have the resources to create a support system, have a support place. Have somewhere where it's all rainbows and sparkles, and whenever you go there, you release everything. I know there’s not a lot of third spaces around, but I would recommend parks, libraries, someone else’s house, churches, youth centres or community centres. I would recommend taking something in which you can communicate to yourself in some way. 

CREATE AN EMOTIONAL FIRST AID KIT. Adding on to my last point, grab a little pouch or box and put things that will calm you down. For example, written affirmations, a prayer, reminders, lollies/candy, list of activities that you can do to calm down,a colouring book with markers, a comfort book or perhaps some money so you can get yourself a nice little comfort meal or a sweet treat.

I'm suggesting this because in the healing process, you will break down completely at least once. I find that its more likely to happen if you’re not going at a pace that is comfortable to you, and it kind of just catches up to you all again. This first aid kit will be essential to not doing anything that we will regret or falling back into unhealthy coping mechanisms. 

EDUCATE YOURSELF. Not a lot of people have easy access to therapy, and I'm aware of that. However, education of whatever happened to us (regardless of how big or small) helps you to understand your experiences and it actually becomes empowering at some point that we have the knowledge of this and how it impacts us, as that knowledge makes it easier to work through it compared to doing it blindfolded. 

While therapy is my first suggestion as its a lot more personalised, however like I said, not a lot of people have easy access to therapy. This is when I would encourage watching documentaries, youtube videos (i would be careful with this one–, i would avoid any ‘gurus’), and read articles or books.

 Whichever way you choose to educate yourself, actually take notes. I’m quite serious, it could be digital or physical notes, but at least write down anything that resonates with you. Then after you’re finished writing those notes, you’re going to treat it like its your homework. Review what you wrote down, break it down into a way that fits your situation, explain why it resonates with you, and the steps you can implement from today to make a change. 

It doesn’t stop there. Weekly, I want you to actually look back on these notes and see if perhaps your opinion has changed and if you’re actually implementing the changes into your life. It seems a bit ‘extra’ but, simply just consuming media for the sake of it, will do nothing! 

EXTRACT ALL SOURCES FROM STRESS FROM YOUR LIFE. I mean all. It doesn’t even have to be cutting off people sometimes like telling your mum that you love her but she’s too overbearing, creating a career master plan if not knowing what you’re going to do in the future stresses you out, tidying out that drawer that you’ve been neglecting etc. 

You want to make this journey as easy as possible for you. The best way to start is to make a list of everything that burdens you. Put the list on one side of the page. Then on the other side, you can list the ways you could change any of these things. 

If you’re in a situation that something stresses you out, but you can’t easily let it go, my best recommendation is to create a solution to it instead of extracting it completely. For example, my job stresses me out, but I need the money, then I would talk to whoever is in charge to help support you better. It seems scary, but asking will put you in a much better position than simply shutting up while screaming internally. 

NOURISH YOURSELF. You’ve probably heard it, but I'm going to say it again, and an unhealthy lifestyle will support an unhealthy state of mind. Go out into nature, drink water, do brisk walks everyday in the sunlight, get your daily fibre and have a healthy sleep cycle. 

Doing this in itself will help you become happier over time, but that is only if it becomes second nature. You will not magically renew after drinking 1L of water once, but you will feel the difference after doing it everyday for a month. 

SPIRITUALITY. People who have and practice strong core beliefs, are a lot happier. You get to define what spirituality means to you, because it doesn’t necessarily mean joining a religion. It could mean being really in tune with nature or it could be mindfulness everyday to get in tune with that side of you.

This one is a bit more controversial, because I don’t believe that you should join a religion out of traumatic events, but because you actually want to. So, while I do encourage you exploring that side of you, make sure you’re doing it. 

[ncillary]

Self Aware AU (Sylus)

Summary: You have the lowest Affinity with Sylus. The reason is because he is a red flag. As red as his eyes. Spawn of the devil. Unless, he is actually not as evil as you label him to be. Does this change something in you? Yes? No? Maybe so?

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Masterlist Self Aware AU

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|  1  |  2  |  3  |  4 [current]  |  5  |

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"You're going on a trip?"

"Yeah. I think I need it to reset myself."

"Excuse me? You are not some device where you can reset it. What happened? And why are you using that phone? Where's your trusted buddy?"

You exhaled through your nose, "I'll explain after my trip is over. Maybe I'll be able to word it better."

She looked worried but accepted your choice.

"I'm a call a way if you need me."

You chuckled, "I'll call you for souvenir choosing.", feeling grateful for your friend's support.

+---------------------------+-----------------------+

"Did she cancel her flight ticket?"

Red eyes looking at the content in the phone. He pondered as he tapped his temple.

"Looks like the kitten still wants to play the chasing game."

He gave an amused smile.

+---------------------------+------------------------+

*Klaak*

You kick your motorcycle stand and kill the engine. You slid your helmet out of your head as you let your face breathe the crisp air, breeze caressing your messy hair. You raked it to a comfortable style.

You went to the countryside in the neighbouring town. It was famous for being a relaxing spot. Mountain view. Waterfall. Museum. A touch of non-technology that you're striving now.

You're rented cabin just in front of you.

"I'm feeling refreshed already, the journey on the way in is not one to forget." You smiled in satisfaction.

+-------------------------+-----------------------+

The night air was different. It was soothing.

A familiar voice said something similar regarding the night air. It resound in your head. You shook it away quickly. Head turning slowly towards your backpack.

You sighed, "Why did I bring the mystery phone with me? Isn't this supposedly a trip to get away from it? Well, the game in it to be precise."

+--------------------------+-------------------------+

"Brrrr... Will every morning going to be this cold."

You're walking to your motorcycle in your gear.

"Let's enjoy the Seven Wonders specifically for this town. First off, waterfall." You start the engine.

Somehow the mystery phone was creeping in your mind again. You shook it away.

+-----------------------+---------------------------+

[So how is it?]

"Great for starters. The waterfall was watery when it splashed down to your feet. The food was fooding for my stomach."

[Thanks for that ridiculous comment. Be sure to comment nicely for your other Wonders of the town.]

"Hahahaha... But seriously, this place really lives up to its advertisement. Maybe you can come here with special someone." You teased her.

[Well, you did come with yours. Give me some tips.]

She teased back as you laughed to it.

The call ended. It was lightening. One statement etched itself on you. You pulled out the mystery phone on the table.

"Maybe I'll check up on it real quick."

Curiosity kills the cat.

You start the game. Your nerves start to boot up too.

Bunny boy. Sitting. Reading.

Blank mind. You logged out, feeling disappointed.

"Huh?" You catch yourself.

Disappointed? Why?

+---------------------------+-----------------------+

You took a picture of the lion statue, the Second Wonders of the town.

The scenery around it was beautiful.

The vast field.

Town people gathering among themselves. Kids playing around. One of them tackled the others in a playful banter. A boy seemed to fall down from getting caught up in the scuffle. A girl tried to help him out only to fall on top of him, eliciting giggles between them.

You smiled.

A flash of something familiar replay in your head.

You turned around, effectively shutting it up.

+------------------------+-------------------------+

You were on the Third Wonders of the town, the oldest tree and still thriving.

On the side of it, you saw an old lady delicately doing craft using multiple threads. She noticed your staring and invited you to join her.

It was fulfilling once you weaved the threads into something new. You were proud of your craft skill. The old lady gently looped the one that she made on your wrist. It's like a bracelet. You insisted on paying both bracelets. She patted your hand and pinched your cheek softly before she shooed you away gently then continued on her work.

You chuckled as you slowly walked away with a wave to her.

+-----------------------------+-----------------------+

The night accompanied you again, lounging at the balcony. You turned the bracelet you made in every angle. You wore it together with the one that's already on you. You took a liking to them being spun together on your wrist.

A certain pouch came to mind.

Along with the person holding it.

Knitted brows slowly appeared.

You're mulling to yourself, still questioning your feelings earlier.

"Am I going bonkers? Why do I feel disa-"

Motorcycle rumbling getting closer. Your self mumbling got interrupted by a new rider coming in. The person parked themselves next to yours. The rider seemed to stare at it for the longest time before he mounted off. Only to sit back on the side of his motorcycle to stare unabashedly at your motorcycle.

Your brows furrowed, "Why do I feel like I want to punch that guy in the face?"

You dressed up warmly.

A feeling you couldn't describe touched you with every step you took towards your motorcycle and that mystery rider.

"Excuse me." Your voice was clear cut in the night.

The person turned to you, giving undivided attention. You walked closer to your motorcycle. The person followed your every move.

"I hope you're not thinking of stealing my bike in front of my eyes."

Standing in between your bike and the rider, you crossed your arm. The person chuckled. He sounded truly amused.

It sounds familiar.

"Judging me for a crime I did not commit already, sweetie."

The muffled voice made you falter. You could hear the beating of your hearts in your ears.

He stood up leisurely. The sheer tallness of this man made you sit on your motorcycle involuntarily. He smirked. You can DEFINITELY hear his subtle sound pulling a smirk behind the helmet.

The helmet slowly slid off his head. White hair jostled around then settled on top of a very familiar face.

He was looking at you full of smugness.

"This little game of cat and mouse between us ends now since the crow has already caught all of the squeaks to present it to the playful kitten."

"...Sylus..."

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|  1  |  2  |  3  |  4 [current] |  5  |

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Masterlist Self Aware AU

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[cha-melodius]

If you're still doing these, I would love #26 with Lokius! I'm enjoying reading what you've done so far 💖

(Ok, getting to the last two of these from other fandoms!! Thank you for sending this one, I decided to keep my 2.06 theme going. Sorry that this turned into an absolute angst bomb. 😂 Slight canon divergence at the end of season 2. Find the other lokius hug ficlet here.)

26: The hug where you’re both holding each other, and neither of you want to let go, so you hold onto each other until you kind of have to let go or you’re gonna be stuck here hugging each other for an eternity. 

The scene is much the same as it always is when he slips back to the Observation Room in the moments before the Loom comes apart. Everyone’s stopped—working, fidgeting, arguing. They all stand, bathed in the golden glow of the fracturing Loom, expressions of awe and dread on their faces.

How many times has he watched this happen? The number is uncountable, surely. Somehow it never gets easier. Somehow it’s even harder now, when he knows the only solution. What he must do to save… everything. What he must give up.

He’s not ready.

He’s never going to be ready.

Still, there’s nothing stopping him from looping this point in time again. Maybe he’s gone… soft, but he can’t feel bad for wanting his last moments of freedom to mean something.

Mobius barely glances away from the Loom when Loki strides over to him. But he turns when Loki puts a hand on his shoulder and frowns at what’s happening on Loki’s face. He’s honestly not even sure right now. It must be dire, whatever it is, because Mobius doesn’t hesitate or say a single word before he pulls Loki into a hug.

They’d shaken hands in the time theater outside of time, before Mobius came apart in front of his eyes. A mistake. How could he have been satisfied with that, after knowing this? Mobius’ arms around his back, pulling him close. The scent of his TVA-issue soap mingled with the subtle spice of his skin, filling Loki’s nose. The scratch of his stubble against Loki’s cheek.

Mobius holds onto him tightly, like he knows exactly what Loki’s about to go do. Like maybe he can change the outcome if he doesn’t let go. He holds Loki like he might be content to do so for all eternity. Loki can’t blame him. He wonders if it might be possible to live in this moment for centuries. Just the two of them, outside of time. For all time, always.

Talk about selfish. He’s tempted anyway.

But he wants more than that for Mobius. The chance to choose his path. The chance to have a life, even if that life doesn’t include Loki. Loki squeezes his eyes closed, though it doesn’t stop the stinging tears from forcing their way out. Any minute now, he’ll pull away and slip back to give himself enough time to tackle the loom before it destroys everything.

“Loki—” Mobius whispers.

Loki squeezes him more tightly, cutting off whatever he might say. “Just— a little more time,” he murmurs back. Any minute now, he’ll do what he must.

Mobius’ arms tighten, and he takes a shuddery breath.

Any minute now.

[harruandlou]

Happy 28th! This is my first time ever doing one of these, but I'm committing to tracking my reading this year so I hope to have one every month. Rereads are marked with a *

Bring Me Home by sunflouwerhabit / @sunflouwerhabit (434k)

“Guys! Does Harry know about Lord Baseball?” Micah squeaks. “Lord Baseball?” Harry says slowly. “He’s only the greatest baseball player of all time!” Micah insists. “Our actual lord and savior, our hero, our shortstop...” Our shortstop. Harry blinks and reaches for another cashew. “Our shortstop? You mean Lou… Louis?” “Lord Baseball.” Micah nods. “The love of my life.” Harry chokes on a cashew. Joe and Tristan cackle while James mutters, “Never stood a chance against those fuckin’ cheekbones…” ~~~ The entire roster of the Cleveland Spiders is in love with star shortstop Louis Tomlinson. Harry most of all. OR: Down the Line (Harry’s Version)

*Golden by shaylea (128k)

Harry is fully dressed when Louis returns to the room. He’s slumped on the edge of the bed, fingers twining awkwardly around the edge of his pink flounces. “Can I come?” he blurts when Louis opens the bathroom door. Louis freezes. “What?” “North. With you,” Harry clarifies. “If you’re going north, could I come too?” On a rainy night in Auckland in the middle of his world tour, popstar Harry Styles loses his ability to carry on. Instead of continuing to Sydney and the rest of his tour, he seeks sanctuary with Louis Tomlinson, a man with a macadamia nut farm and a mysterious past.

wildflower by blueskiesrry / @blueskiesrry (112k)

“You look like a wildflower,” Louis comments, shielding his eyes from the sun, the crinkles near them even more prominent in this light. “What?” Harry’s words stumble over a surprised laugh. “With your hair all fluffy like that.” Harry’s fingers automatically find their way into his hair as he silently curses the humidity out on the water. “He kind of does, doesn’t he?” Elizabeth adds. Louis tilts his head to the side, smile softening and blurred around the edges. “Our very own long-stemmed wildflower.” - or: a 1950s hollywood story spanning half a decade where harry and louis are constantly growing towards, away from, & around each other and everything harry wants are things he can’t have.

*everything to lose by stylinsoncity / @stylinsoncity (92k)

harry is a global popstar who's convinced the world he has it all -- a happy marriage to a devoted alpha, two beautiful children, two grammy awards, three platinum albums, and a budding film career. but some aspects of his image aren't as true as they seem. like the fact he's been separated for over a year, uses meaningless flings to cope and occasionally forgets responsibilities or commitments to his family. he and louis once commanded stages together. they tackled any challenges to their future. and no matter how hard things got, they always returned to one another. harry would always return to louis. until one day, he finds he can't.

*Late Night Talking by kingsofeverything / @kingsofeverything (53k)

Louis Tomlinson has a new album coming out and a second world tour on the horizon. Promo season gets underway with a stop at Late Night Talking, the late night show hosted by Harry Styles, and Harry Styles just happens to be the man who blew a chance to date Louis a decade ago.

*No Hold To Hold Onto by kingsofeverything / @kingsofeverything (47k)

Injured after being thrown from a bronc, Harry doesn’t know if he’ll ever compete again. His only hope is a man called Tommo, a world champion rider who retired at the top of his game. When Harry goes looking for help learning a new way to rope and ride, the last thing he expects to find is love.

Tease by dolce_piccante (12k)

AU. Louis Tomlinson, actor and movie star, is wildly in love with his boyfriend, supermodel Harry Styles. Their relationship is lovely and unlike any Louis has ever had before, which makes the surprise of Harry's newest interest that much more intriguing.

*In Jest by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup (4k)

Louis, who smiles at Harry as he reclines in his chair. Louis, whose soulmark is visible thanks to his low-cut top. Louis, Harry’s soulmate, who seems to either be blissfully ignorant of that fact or maliciously ignoring it. Harry would really like to know which.

--I also listened to the podfic of this which can be found here by @pandapodfics

[im-no-jedi]

not him standing like this while Phee and Wrecker are moving rocks, sir please 🥵

[almea]

Bumbleby hugs

[aloe-plant-yippee]

I STARTED LISTENING TO MORIARTY : THE DEVILS GAME AND ITS SO GOOD TO THE MULTIPLE PPL OR MAYBE EVEN JUST THE SAME PERSON POSTING REPEATEDLY THANK YOU !!!!!!

rambles under cut (and spoilers for eps 1-5)

THE PLOT IS ACTUALLY SO INTERESTING IM ON EP 6 AND ITS BEEN SO INTERESTING TO SEE MORIARTYS LIKE FINAL LINE GET PROGRESSIVELY FUTHER AND FUTHER LOWER.

BUT HE STILL DOESNT WANT TO KILL PPL/CAUSE HARM IF IT CAN BE AVOIDED???? LIKE WITH THE JOHN WATSON SCENE WHERE THEY HAD KIDNAPPED HIM HE WAS LIKE OK BUDDY IM GOING TO TORTURE U BUT LIKE I DONT WANT TO BUT I WILL DO IT BECAUSE I HAVE TO.

I ALSO LOVE SEEING HIS GOALS CHANGE, LIKE AT FIRST IT WAS TO FIND OUT WHO MURDERED ROSE AND THEN HE DECIDED IT DIDNT MATTER AS MUCH AS THE WHOLE WORLD GOING TO SHIT. HES SUCH A GOOD PROTAG

SHERLOCKS PORTRAYAL IS SO FUCKING FASCINATING AS WELL!!!! LIKE HE MAKES SUCH A GOOD VILLAIN BUT THE WAY THEY STILL KEEP IT CANON COMPLIANT IS SO GOOOODDD.

I WAS ALSO QUITE THROWN OFF BY SHERLOCK AND WATSONS DYNAMIC IN VERY USED TO MY SILLY ALMOST GAY PPL AND WATSON SEEMS TO ACTUALLY ABHOR SHERLOCK LMAO

ALSO LESTRADES CHARACTER?????? ITS SO DIFFERENT THAN ANY ADAPTATION IVE SEEN (IN A GOOD WAY)

[nametakensff]

.

[chasedeys]

bengals win today yes?

[wereh0gz]

Issue 69 (nice) is very good and very fun :]

[zoekrystall]

Zero idea if it'll help or fade into the background but I downloaded stuff to track things and smacked widgets onto my homescreen to not forget. Initially searched for pain ones (where I downloaded two just for good measure ig) but saw that one is customizable for like anything you want and no purchase stuff for me bc included in that one pass and said sure fuck it. I think at the min I need to track pain bc by my memory do I go mental thinking if it just feels frequent n all or if it actually is and mind goes blank when at the doc (will just be fun translating to ger OTL I learn sm to describe stuff in eng but then it lacks in first language). Alas for whatever reason lil me never thought abt actually writing these things down (prob bc every adult anyways dismissed them to the point of not being sure if the pain was actually there so what was the point. but now. now I'm the adult in my life who calls the shots for their own life even if anxiety makes it hard).

[musical-chick-13]

ALSO now that I'm on the Complaint Train, I would love it if I could say, "This thing might be artistically good on other levels and if you like it, good for you have fun, but the gross way it talks about/handles mental illness is too much for me, to the point where I have to avoid watching/reading it for my own well-being" and people would go, "Yeah, that makes sense, you do you" instead of "Omg, you're so sensitive, lmao just get over it."

[pierswife]

Thinkin about little ways my F/Os would comfort me and help keep me grounded after a really really bad panic attack and it's helping a lot, admittedly.

Linhardt would like... sit down beside me and hold my hand while rubbing small circles into my hand with his thumb. He'd also speak super softly to me and tell me all sorts of different facts about anything and everything to keep me focused on him.

Lyon would do something similar, but it would be an arm around me while he hums a familiar tune to both of us. He'd rock us back and forth gently until I feel ready to try and sleep.

Diluc would let me hide. And what I mean is whoever he finds me, he asks me if I want to keep "hiding", whether it be under my blankets or in his coat. Regardless, he'd wrap his coat around my shoulders (or lay it on top of me) and promise to sit next to me while I sleep to protect me, like how a big brother should.

Flavio would just hold me tight, especially in the moment when I'm the messiest. He would hold me as tight as he could until I was ready to let go and he wouldn't care if I cried super hard to the point I could barely talk or got tears all over his shoulder. He knows that I just want to feel safe and need someone there, so to him he thinks one of the best ways to help me calm down is to just let me cling to him as much as I need to.

I'd include Trand but idk if he'd be sure what to do besides asking if I wanna get some fresh air and go for a walk to help get the energy out somewhere.

[tjerra14]

Me: [works for 9.5 hours, then does some pre-work on the new fish tank (washing and adding 20kg of substrate, hauling 150+ litres of water with a 10l bucket)]

Also me: why am I so tired

[steddieme]

in most fics i've read robin is grossed out when steve talks about his sex life, which is probably far more in character for her, but hear me out

imagine them discussing literally everything. like having no boundaries whatsoever.

one day robin mentions she's never seen a dick and she's curious what all the fuss is about.

robin: you have one

steve: yeah...?

robin: so show me

steve: ??

steve: sure, why not

when steve pulls down his pants, robin just stares at him with a blank face

robin: that's... it?

steve: what do you mean that's it??

robin: it looks sad

steve: ??? well, it's not hard rn, obviously???

robin: ugh, boring

steve: you want me to show you my hard dick?? is that what's happening rn?

robin: i mean yeah?

steve: your judgemental face is forever burned into my mind. i don't think i'll ever be able to get hard again.

then robin bursts into his room like a week later

robin: steve, you're a slut-

steve: hey!

robin: so you know your way around a vagina, right?? i need you to tell me if i have a rash or not

steve: do you not own a handheld mirror?

robin: i'm freaking out so much, i can't make a sound observation rn

steve: *sigh* alright

turns out robin does indeed have a rash and steve takes her to the doctor

at one point they lose all shame. steve regularly air dries while robin hangs out in his room. robin makes steve do her monthly breast self-exam. they check each other for ticks.

when steve and eddie start dating steve tells robin literally everything. robin knows way too much about eddie and she loves it.

robin comes over for movie night, eddie is already there

robin: how was your day?

steve: we slept in, then eddie fucked me, it was great-

eddie: *chokes*

steve: then we cooked lunch, there are some leftovers in the fridge, go ahead and eat. yours?

eddie: ???

robin: ugh, don't get me started-

eddie: wait wait wait, how did you just say that so casually?

stobin: ???

eddie: that i fucked you??

steve: i tell robin everything. i told you that. you said that's fine.

eddie: i didn't know that included our sex life?

steve: why wouldn't it? ... wait, oh no, are you not okay with that?? i'm sorry, i thought you knew??

eddie: oh no, it's fine! it just surprised me is all. y'all are real freaks, carry on

stobin: okay then

robin freaks out before her first date with a girl

robin: what if my vagina looks weird???

steve: are you planning to fuck her on the first date, buckley? and how many times do i have to tell you your vagina looks absolutely normal??

robin: no, i'm not, but it's still a valid concern!!! what if my vagina looks hideous to girls??

eddie, the silent observer: lol

steve: what are you even talking about... a vagina is a vagina, vagina lovers love all vaginas

robin: stop saying vagina

steve: vagina vagina vagina-

robin tackles him and they end up wrestling until steve yields

steve: okay okay,, as someone who's seen his fair share of coochies

robin: that's even worse

steve: yours looks perfectly fine.

eddie: wait, you've seen it?

stobin, staring at him: ...

eddie: right, dumb question