#and their weird tension and bitchiness

[t00thpasteface]

part of the reason i love mean, bitchy, rude, domineering, firecracker female characters and loathe seeing them defanged is because the prickliness repels men and the defanging is ALWAYS to make them more fuckable for whatever man they have a weird sexual tension with. like yeah i don't like the Mean Lesbian stereotype either but at least the mean lesbian isn't shelving her career to become a tradwife after spending however many episodes/chapters/issues saying how much she didn't want to do either of those things

[npdclaraoswald]

It is genuinely weird that Community never went for the Jeff/Shirley angle. He's got romances with the other girls, including the one half his age, but not her. I think their bitchiness could interact in really fun ways to ratchet up tension with them and the group. Far better than putting her with Chang

[itneverendshere]

the aftermath of sex with rafe and you’re about to roll out to leave and he’s like “what’s going on” and you’re like “oh you want me to stay?”

decided to use this request for bitchy!pogue!reader, bc i love their dynamic in my last drabble for them and wanted to see their relationship develop!! hope that's okay and thank you for the request!!🫶🏼🫶🏼

said it a million times, only stay with you one more night - r.c

pairing: bitchy!pogue!reader x rafe

your breath was still shaky as you lay in rafe’s bed, staring up at the ceiling. the room smelled like sex and bad decisions—the same old combination every time you found yourself tangled up with him.

what the fuck had you done? again.

you groaned internally, rolling to the side and blinking at the mess of clothes on the floor. your clothes. you needed to get out of here, like you always did after. this was a routine by now—fuck rafe, get dressed, leave before shit got weird.

but, of course, it was always weird with rafe.

he was your worst mistake on repeat, the asshole kook you swore you hated but couldn’t seem to stop ending up in bed with. and you weren’t entirely wrong. he was an asshole. that perfect jawline of his clenched every time he looked at you, like he wanted to snap or—snap you in half, depending on the day. he acted like he couldn’t stand you most of the time, and you loved it.

especially when you knew exactly where that frustration would end up: right between your legs.

you knew the deal. this thing with rafe was nothing but sex. pure tension. you loved driving him insane, loved the way his face would twist, how his hands would grip your hips with just a little too much pressure, like he had something to prove. but the second it was over, he always turned cold. he’d stare at you with that same look—disgusted, maybe even regretful—like he couldn’t believe he’d let himself touch you.

and you weren’t about to stick around for that bullshit.

with a sigh, you pushed the covers back and swung your legs out of the bed, standing up with a wince as your body reminded you just how hard he'd fucked you. the soreness in your thighs was a not-so-subtle reminder of how you ended up here, naked, in his bed again when you swore to yourself that the last time was really the last time.

you didn’t even bother looking at him as you reached for your jeans on the floor, pulling them on quickly. you needed to get out of here before he started up with that whole “i don’t even know why i did this” attitude, like you were the problem.

 “where are you going?”

you didn’t even look back at him as you yanked your top over your head. “leaving. what’s it look like?”

the bed creaked as he sat up, and you could practically feel his eyes burning into your back. “what the fuck is going on?”

you paused, one arm halfway through your top, rolling your eyes at his tone. now he wanted to act like something was different? “what do you mean, what’s going on?” you shot back, sarcasm dripping from every word. “’m leaving. you know, like i always do after we fuck.”

rafe didn’t answer right away, and for a second, you thought maybe he’d just let it go. but then he surprised you.

“you don’t have to go.”

you turned around slowly, narrowing your eyes at him. “what? you want me to stay now?” he never asked you to stay. hell, he was usually halfway out the door emotionally before you even got your clothes back on.

his face hardened at your reaction, that familiar pissed-off look settling into his features. “yeah, i don’t know, maybe i do.”

you laughed, genuinely surprised. “since when? you want me to hang around and play house after?”

“do you always have to make everything so fucking complicated?”

you raised an unimpressed brow, “okay, i think you hit your head on the bedframe earlier.”

“shut the fuck up and get in bed.”

you froze, mid-laugh, because—wait—what? rafe cameron, the king of "get out before i pretend you don’t exist," actually wanted you to stay.

“excuse me?” you blinked at him, fully expecting him to break character any second

he was unpredictable like that. one minute, he was treating you like you’re beneath him—like you were the dirty secret he couldn't believe he kept hooking up with—and the next? he was saying stuff that made your heart do this stupid thing it had no business doing.

“get back in bed,” he demanded, like he actually expected you to listen.

“why? so you can flip back to being a fucking asshole in the morning?”

he rolled his eyes and groaned like you were the exhausting one here, “can you just—” he hesitated, clearly fighting with whatever stupid thoughts were bouncing around that kook head of his. “just come back to bed.”

and oh god, why did he have to sound almost...vulnerable?

you stared at him, fully aware this was a bad idea. the two of you didn’t “do” feelings. shit, he barely “did” conversation after sex. this wasn’t just out of character for him; it was out of this planet.

so you crossed your arms and tilted your head, leaning against his dresser like you had all the time in the world. “are you serious right now, cameron? you actually want me to stay? for what, a cuddle session? netflix?”

he gave you that trademark irritated look, tongue poking his cheek. “you’re so fucking difficult.”

“yeah, well, you’re not exactly easy, baby.”

you smirked, half expecting him to snap again. but instead, he did something you never saw coming. he ran a hand through his messy hair—full-on frustrated—and sighed. a real sigh. and then, in this quiet voice that was so unlike him, he said, “maybe i just don’t want you to leave.”

you felt your stomach flip. no no no. this wasn’t part of the deal. you two weren’t supposed to catch feelings. but the way he was looking at you, all raw and real for once, made your brain go foggy. you could leave right now. walk out, just like you always did, like a smart girl.

but something in his voice was pulling you back, like maybe this time was different. “rafe…” 

“just stay,” he murmured, eyes locked on yours, and for the first time since you started this whole messed-up dance with him, you saw something in his face that wasn’t anger or lust or annoyance.

it almost looked like...he cared. maybe you’d stay, just to see what this was about.

you weren’t about to let your guard down completely. you weren’t some naive kook princess. you knew how to protect yourself—especially from guys like him, because let’s be honest, rafe was a certified disaster in human form. and you weren’t any better.

you sighed, running a hand through your hair. “if i stay, you’re not gonna pull some ‘i don’t know why i did this’ bullshit tomorrow, right? ‘cause ’m not dealing with that again, cameron.”

he huffed, but there was this softness to it. “can you just stay without turning everything into a fight?”

“turning it into a fight?” you raised a brow, incredulous. “that’s literally your specialty.”

rafe’s jaw tightened—again—but instead of snapping back like usual, he just stared at you. “’m not asking for forever, alrigh’? just one night. jesus.”

one night.

you could do one night, right?

you climbed back onto the bed, settling into the sheets next to him. it felt...weird. not in a bad way, just different. usually, you’d be out of here by now, shorts half-buttoned, sneaking out like some guilty secret. but this? lying next to him, clothes still off, in his bed, with his scent all around you? it felt more intimate than any of the wild, angry sex you’d had with him before.

“happy now?” you muttered, glancing over at him.

rafe didn’t say anything for a second. he just looked at you, like he wasn’t sure how to act either. “yeah. maybe i am.”

it was bizarre, how different this felt from all the other times. there was no rush to leave, no awkward scramble to avoid the inevitable “i shouldn’t have done that” speech. just the two of you, lying there in silence. you felt his hand brush against yours under the covers. it wasn’t a big, dramatic move, just his fingers lightly grazing your skin.

it was such a small thing, but somehow, it felt... huge. rafe was the last guy on earth you ever expected to be soft, especially with you. but here he was, in this tiny, almost awkward moment, doing something that felt closer to intimacy than anything else you’d ever shared. what the hell was happening?

“you’re acting like a human being. it’s weirding me out.”

he smirked, but it didn’t have the usual arrogance behind it. “maybe 'm just tired of being an asshole.”

you chuckled, shaking your head. “that would be a first.”

he didn’t fight back like you expected. instead, his hand moved a little under the covers, and suddenly, his fingers were really holding yours, not just grazing but actually intertwining with your own. you blinked down at your joined hands, feeling your heart flip-flop in a way that annoyed you. this wasn’t what you signed up for, not even close.

but then again, when had anything with him ever gone according to plan.

“why are you doing this?” you asked quietly, trying to ignore how fast your pulse was beating.

rafe’s jaw clenched—again, with the jaw clenching—but this time, it didn’t feel like frustration. he was thinking, actually thinking about what to say, and that alone was enough to make you nervous.

“i don’t know,” he admitted, “i just—” He stopped himself, taking a deep breath like the words were hard for him to get out. “maybe i don’t hate you as much as i thought i did.”

that threw you for a loop. he was never this honest. you stared at him, eyes wide, waiting for the punchline, but there wasn’t one. he wasn’t smirking, wasn’t trying to act like he didn’t care. he just... said it. like it was the most normal thing in the world to admit feelings when feelings weren’t even on the table.

“Wow,” you breathed, genuinely shocked. “you really hit your head earlier.”

he snickered, but it sounded different—soft, even. “Yeah, maybe I did.”

“should i call for a doctor?”

it was unsettling seeing him like this, not lashing out or shutting you down with a snide comment. 

“you don’t always have to make everything a joke.”

your eyebrows shot up at that, the surprise clear on your face. “excuse me? that’s literally what we do—” you gestured vaguely between the two of you. “that’s our thing.”

he just sighed, shaking his head like he was genuinely exasperated with you. before you could throw out another sarcastic remark, he grabbed you by the back of your neck, pulling you into a kiss.

his hand gripped the back of your neck with just enough pressure to hold you in place, but there was a tenderness in the way his fingers tangled in your hair. his lips met yours gently at first as if testing the waters, and the softness of it scared you. you were so used to him being all teeth, nipping, and biting, that this moment of quiet, hesitant intimacy caught you off guard. he kissed you like he was savoring it—like this was something he wanted to remember.

his thumb brushed lightly along your jawline, as the kiss deepened, his lips pressing a little harder against yours, but it still lacked the aggression you’d come to expect from him. there was no desperation here. his tongue flicked against your bottom lip, gentle but insistent, and without thinking, you parted your lips, letting him in. your bodies stayed close, but it wasn’t the usul closeness that came from lust. the slow, languid rhythm of his mouth against yours was intimate in a way that felt too personal.

rafe was kissing you like you were someone he cared about, like you were more than just another way to burn off steam. this wasn’t what you two did. you weren’t supposed to share soft touches and slow kisses. you were supposed to fight, tear each other apart, then fuck like it was the only thing holding you together.

when the kiss finally broke, you felt dazed, staring at him like you didn’t recognize the person in front of you. rafe, however, didn’t seem fazed. he just looked at you with those piercing blue eyes, still holding the back of your neck like he was afraid you’d bolt the second he let go.

“i meant it,” he said quietly, his voice a low, “i don’t want you to leave.”

“i don’t do this,” you muttered, shaking your head. “we don’t do this.”

rafe’s grip on your neck loosened, but his hand didn’t move. “i know. just tonight.”

you closed your eyes, breathing him in. he smelled like sweat and sex and something that made your entire body hurt in a way you hadn’t expected. maybe he wasn’t asking for forever, but staying here with him felt like it could change everything.

one night and you’d worry about tomorrow when it came.

[sapphicantics]

Two Sides of the Same Coin | Chapter Two

Pairing: Regina George x fem!reader

Summary: After a nobody destroys the Jocks and insults the Queen Bee without a care or an apology, you get catapulted to the top of the social food chain next to aforementioned Queen Bee, Regina George, who now has to learn to share the spotlight with North Shore’s new bad girl. | Or alternatively, your ‘don’t give a fuck’ attitude sucks you and Regina into each other’s worlds sending you down a path you never expected.

Word count: 1.5k

Contents: mentions of violence, reader might be coming off a bit toxic but she’s meant to be cocky, angry!Regina, sexual tension???, explicit language, a little stalking, more shitty comebacks, think that’s all let me know if I missed any

Note: Well, this chapter took a different turn than I was expecting but honestly I think this is better than what was originally planned. Certain parts of this chapter made me cackle while writing and I hope it makes you cackle too so enjoy my shitty sense of humor

Intro - Chapter One

— — — —

Assuming it’d be a hell of a day might have been a little dramatic.

It’s been a day so far, sure, but nothing different than what you’re used to.

You’ve got a busted lip and your knuckles are sore from, for lack of a better term, bashing Christian Wiggins face in this morning and sending him to the nurse’s office. Perhaps, you’d feel guilty if it wasn’t for the fact that he busted your lip open first.

As often as you have been getting into fights, you thought someone would have noticed by now that you don’t ever throw the first punch - thus granting you the excuse of self-defense.

Though, even if they did know the jocks have far less self control than you and would never be able to refrain from reacting to the things you say.

Speaking of refraining from reacting, Regina has been watching you all day. She still is, right now. Well, technically Gretchen is watching you, but you know she’s doing it because Regina told her to and you know she’s gonna report back to Regina immediately because Regina told her to.

Seems a little obsessive of her, really.

Which is funny considering.

Whatever, you don’t have anything to do with that. If Regina wants to have her little minions following you around then that’s her business.

Also you’re pretty sure Regina intended for Gretchen to be discreet and not make it obvious that she’s watching you, but maybe you’re wrong. Maybe Regina wants you to know she’s watching.

That sounds like something she’d do as an act of intimidation, or even just for fun so you wouldn’t put it past her.

Either way, you know Gretchen is there.

You wouldn’t find this weird because you two do share this class. Normally, you guys sit on opposite sides of the room from each other, but Gretchen is now sitting three seats behind you - not too far away where she can’t see you clearly, but not close enough to where it’s obvious.

( Or maybe it wouldn’t have been obvious if you showed up to class on time, but since you didn’t it was immediately apparent that she switched seats. )

You ignore it because one: you don’t care, and two: what exactly are you gonna do about it? Gretchen’s already anxious enough having to deal with Regina’s bitchiness daily, you’re not about to worsen it by confronting her over something so trivial.

You catch her taking pictures of you and typing rapidly on her phone moments after you have this thought, and now you just have to confront her.

You catch her after the bell before she can escape the classroom, throwing your arm over her shoulder and steering her away from the door. She squeaks as you do so, tightening her grip on her belongings. “So Gretchen, mind telling me why you were taking photos of me when you thought I wasn’t looking?”

She stammers, her eyes widening. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about. I wasn’t taking pictures of you.”

“Right. So if I took your phone and went to your messages with Regina I wouldn’t find pictures with live updates you’ve been sending her during class?”

Gretchen’s hand tightens even more on her phone if that’s possible, her knuckles turning white with how hard her grip is.

That’s answer enough for you.

“Yeah that’s what I thought. Do me a favor,” you hum, leaning closer to Gretchen. “Tell Regina, and I want you to tell her word for word what I’m about to say, to stop acting like a little bitch and sending her minions to spy on me instead of coming to see me face-to-face.”

Gretchen’s mouth drops open. “I can’t say that to her! She’ll kill me!”

“You’ll be fine as long as you mention my name immediately,” you wave off her concerns which is kind of a rude thing to do, but the whole school already thinks you’re a rude person so may as well uphold the reputation. “Word for word, Gretchen. I’ll know if you don’t.”

That sounds vaguely like a threat that implies you’re gonna come after her if she doesn’t say it word for word. You’re not, but she doesn’t need to know that.

“Go on, Gretchen, you’ve only got a minute and a half before the next class starts, and I’m sure you know how Regina feels about being kept waiting.”

You take your arm off her shoulders and after a moment, she peels out of the classroom, rushing off to Regina.

You sigh and shake your head, you feel bad for that because Gretchen did not deserve your threats and she doesn’t deserve the ire she’s about to get from Regina.

You’d apologize, but you’re sure you’ll never be able to get close to Gretchen again after this.

It’s too late to take it back now so you exit the room and head off to your next class on the opposite side of the school.

— — — —

North shore doesn’t allow students to leave the school early without prior consent from a parent or guardian, or under special circumstances, which you have neither of right now. They don’t really have a way to stop you from leaving, but they will call home and Principal Duvall will pull you into his office in the morning for a lecture, and those are headaches waiting to happen that you’d rather avoid. So even though you’d rather be anywhere else, you’re spending your free period — your last class of the day — lounging around in the cafeteria.

You’re sitting criss-cross atop a table, elbow resting bent upon your knee while your chin rests in the palm of your hand. You’re staring out the window, a single earbud in while Hayley Kiyoko plays in your ear.

You hum along under your breath, a faint clicking noise drawing your eyes to the cafeteria entrance. The doors burst open and in walks Regina, her eyes honing in on you like a target. Her fury is palpable even from here and it makes you smirk knowing you’re able to get under her skin — knowing you’re the only one able to get under her skin like this.

Does this say a lot about you? That you find joy in making Regina angry?

Yes, probably, but why shouldn’t you find joy in calling a bully out on their shit.

Regina slams her hands on the table in front of you interrupting your thoughts. Her glare is intense, and if you were anyone else you’d be cowering under her gaze. Instead, you cock an eyebrow, completely un-phased by the blonde in front of you.

“Something I can do for you, George?”

“You think you’re such hot shit, don’t you? You think you can call me a bitch and get away with it; with no consequences?”

“Oh, no, does the big bad Queen Bee not like being called what she knows she is?” You pout mockingly at her. “Is that all it takes for you to lose your cool, being called a bitch?”

You laugh loudly at that.

It stokes the flames of Regina’s anger and she yanks you up by your collar, your shoes scraping the edge of the table before landing harshly on the floor as Regina slams you against the wall.

Huh, look at that. Prissy pink princess Regina George has the muscles to throw you around.

This is quite the development.

“Congratulations George, you’ve made it about two steps further than anyone else ever has. Think carefully about your next move, lest I let my instincts take over and I fuck up that pretty little face of yours.”

“You have no idea who you’re messing with. I will ruin your life.” She growls at you, ignoring your words.

“Threatening to ruin my life,” you tilt your head in amusement, leaning your face closer to hers. “Seems rather obsessive of you, George. Perhaps you wanna kiss me first. That’s quite on brand for you.”

Regina’s jaw clenches and her grip on you tightens. She goes to speak, but the bell ringing to signal the end of the day cuts her off and you smirk. “You might wanna let me go. If anyone walks by they’ll think you’re making out with me and then everyone will be calling you Sissy Liz, and we can’t have that, now can we?”

Wow, threatening to fight Regina and bringing up her old friendship with Janis — twice, in two different ways — all in a span of like forty-five seconds is absolutely insane.

Regina scowls at you, her eyes practically alight with malice. She doesn’t want to let you go because if she does that means you win, that means you get away with disrespecting her for the third time with no consequences, and no one wins against her, no one is supposed to win against her ever, but you’ve done it twice now and you’re about to do it again.

She shoves you harshly against the wall one last time at the realization and, wow, you’re really priding yourself at the moment because the fact that she’s still standing when anyone else would be on the ground right now speaks volumes to your self-control, but then anyone else would’ve hit you by now so maybe it speaks more to Regina’s intelligence that she’s not.

“This is not over.” With that she turns on her heel and storms away, leaving you with a smirk as you watch her retreating figure.

[steviewashere]

What's A Boy in Love Supposed To Do?

Rating: Teen and Up CW: Biphobia, Eddie Being Kind of an Asshole at First, Use of the Word Queer (But not as a Slur) Tags: Post-Canon, Angst, Hopeful Ending, Aware of Own Bisexuality Steve Harrington, Gay Eddie Munson, Angry Steve Harrington, Pre-Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Temporary Unrequited Love/Feeligns, Rejection, (But not completely because Eddie doesn't know how he feels yet), Steve Harrington Loves Eddie Munson, Confident Steve Harrington, Bitchy Steve Harrington, (And he deserves to be here), Eddie Munson Being an Idiot, Eddie Munson Figuring Things Out, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, (But He's Not in Love Yet), Mild Resolve, Dialogue Heavy, Author is Bisexual For @steddieangstyaugust Day 24 Prompt: "Go, see if I care." Title from "Oh l'amour" by Erasure

🏳️‍🌈—————🏳️‍🌈 “As flattered as I am, Steve, I don’t want to be somebody’s experiment.”

He blinks at Eddie. Rigid to the cushion he sits on. It’s an instantaneous reaction: the flush of his cheeks, the pull to his lips, the narrowing of his eyes. A rage, he doesn’t think he’s felt since Jonathan Byers and his camera, begins to fill him. Can feel it low in the pit of his stomach and pulsing in the center of his forehead.

The gall of this asshole, Steve thinks, I can’t believe this shit.

Steve clicks his tongue on the back of his teeth. “Excuse me?” he asks thinly, “what the hell are you talking about?” His hands lay on his knees and squeeze harshly, fingernails digging through the denim of his jeans.

Eddie’s mouth twists. A sharp breath shoots through his nose. He looks away from Steve’s face, shrugging. “I mean,” he says slowly, “I mean…you like girls, Steve. This could just be a fluke. Like a…like maybe you should put more thought into this.”

Can’t help himself, Steve scoffs loudly. “Genuinely, Eddie, what the fuck are you talking about? I come out to you, I tell you that I like you, and you—what—turn this around as if I’m stupid about my feelings?”

“I guess?” Eddie answers, honest in a way Steve thinks he shouldn’t be. “You’re just…you’re confused. You’ve got some wires crossed or something. Maybe it’s just because I share some features with Nancy. But you don’t like me, Steve. Not really.”

He’s honestly not sure how to respond to that. Part of him is wilted. Part of him is alive with fury and flames, with tension, and unease. This feeling through him is the thing he doesn’t know. Steve falls back into his seat on the sofa, arms crossed over his chest, and avoiding all of Eddie he’d be able to see.

“Can’t believe this,” Steve mutters, “can’t believe you’re treating me like this, too. Why does everybody think that.”

“What do you”—

“I’ve been to queer bars, y’know,” he explains bitterly, “been in there searching for people who catch my eye. Because, get this if you can, I’m not a picky person.” Steve glares daggers at Eddie. “Because, and if you can believe me on this, I know what I want. Surprising, I know. But you wouldn’t know that because you treat me like everybody does—like I’m some brainless fucking low-life who only knows how to use his dick and bat his eyes.

“I go out and tell these people at the bars that I’m bisexual. That I’m into guys, that I’m into girls. Tell ‘em that, yeah, I only have experience getting in bed with a girl. But it’s not like I’m not interested in that aspect with guys, too—I just haven’t had the chance, you understand me on that, I’m sure.” And that maybe hits a little too hard; knowing that Eddie’s gay and that his experience with sex is very limited. He continues, though, “Yet, as soon as I try and explain myself, I get pushed away. I get looked at all weird. One time, a guy told me I wasn’t queer enough to be with him. Like…what the fuck does that even mean?”

“Steve, I”—

He points a finger in Eddie’s face, hand shaking and palm sweating. “Don’t interrupt me. You came out to me and I listened all the way through; you get to hear me out, too.” Steve huffs. Draws his hand back towards his lap, immediately going to his habit of picking at his fingers. Trying to allocate the nerves he has, the ones that were so intense a few moments ago. “How queer do I have to be to want to kiss a guy?” he speaks rhetorically and quietly, “how queer do I have to be to appreciate the way they smile at me? Or…or how queer do I have to be to want to hold your hand, Eddie? Seriously. What’s it gonna take? Is it ‘experimenting’ if I know that I want it? Is it ‘experimenting’ if I know how much I already love you?

“Because I do, if you can believe that. I fell in love with you before I really had the words. And I fell in love with you before I came to the realization that I like guys, too. But I know my own feelings. I’ve been in love before, I think I can understand that part of me.” He looks down at his hands in his lap, eyes burning, throat stinging, and face flushing hot. “I wish I didn’t have to explain something I already know. But I guess I will for however long people question the authenticity of my sexuality. Including you, I guess.”

The room fills with tense silence after that. Air so hot and so thick, he can feel it heavy on his shoulders, weighing him further and further, and making him sink deep into the cushion underneath him.

Sure, this isn’t the first time he’s been rejected. Nancy did. Robin did. Now Eddie is. He’s been rejected by guys at the bars and clubs. Maybe he doesn’t have the whole knowledge or ‘etiquette’ to this yet, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to learn. He wants to call a guy his baby, hook his finger into their belt loop, drag them into a dark corner and kiss them soundly and breathlessly. Wants to take a guy home at the end of the night and hold his hand as they figure out each other’s bodies. Kiss him in the morning, if the guy sticks around. Wants to relish in the scratch of facial hair on his sensitive skin.

He could see himself with men, that’s the thing. He knows that in his fantasies—whether it be imagining himself with the men in the centerfolds of gay magazines, or the daydreams of being in love with Freddie Mercury—that he’s completely comfortable with the thought of being with a man. Loves the thought of it so much, that he finally realized he wanted that with Eddie especially. Because a night-in with Eddie, watching a movie, arm around his back, cushioning his cheek on Eddie’s shoulder, kissing each other slow and soft—all of that sounds like heaven, a dream that could animate and he could make real.

On the couch, distance between them, Steve’s never felt so far away from a dream of his. Even that initial daydream with Nancy sounds more probable than falling in love with Eddie slowly and surely. He sort of, really, hates that.

“Steve,” Eddie breathes. “I don’t know what to say.”

An apology might be nice, Steve sourly thinks. He just shrugs, though. “I don’t know what I want you to say, so,” he states quietly.

Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Eddie give one sharp nod. “This is…a lot to take in. I should just leave.”

Of course. Run away, Eds. Run away like you always do. “Go. See if I care,” Steve murmurs. Face at his lap still, tears ready to spill down his cheeks. A part of him thinks that he’ll never see Eddie again. He doesn’t want that. But maybe…maybe it’s for the best? It’s the one thing he doesn’t know.

Eddie stands up, walks towards the door, but stops in the doorway to the living room. He raps his knuckles on the doorframe. Steve can’t help but look up. “I accept you,” Eddie says quietly, “even if it’s too easy to say or too easy to hear, but I do. Just let me have a little bit of time to think about your confession, Steve. I think I feel the same, but I want to be confident like you. I don’t want to hurt you again.”

He inhales slowly and lets out a soft breath through his mouth. Steve wants a better apology, but one thing at a time, he supposes. It was hard when he figured things out for himself; it’s harder to hold a grudge against somebody doing the exact same thing. “If you find out you feel the same,” Steve says hopefully, “can we hold hands?”

“Stevie, when I’m confident about how I feel, we can do whatever you want. I’ll be back, I promise. I’ll have better words and a better apology, too.” He lets go of the doorframe, where he rested his hand after knocking on it. But before he can leave, he looks Steve directly in the eyes. Says, “And there’s no such thing as ‘queer enough’. You’re perfect as-is, Steve. I’m just stupid. And those other guys are complete assholes for not even attempting to get their heads out of their asses and go out with you.

“You deserve the world. And I want to give that to you.”

“Let’s cool off first.”

Eddie nods again, smiles small, and Steve returns it. “Yeah, we should do that,” he whispers. Lets out a deep sigh. Softly, “Take care of yourself tonight, okay? I’m sorry for…I’m sorry for being an ignorant pile of shit. I’m gonna do better, no matter how long it takes to prove myself to you.”

After that, Eddie lets himself out. And Steve lets him leave, doesn’t chase after him, even when every part of him panics about letting Eddie get away. But this is for the better, he thinks. Knows that not everything works itself better overnight. It’s a start, though. Not a satisfying one, but it’s the beginning of something.

🏳️‍🌈—————🏳️‍🌈

[melswifeasf]

You were never mine

Fandom: Yellowjackets

Pairing: Natalie Scatorccio x fem!reader

Genre: angst.

words: 6.9k

Warnings: major character death, heartbreaking angst and slight sexual themes.

Summary: you loved Natalie more than anything, until your dying breath.

Notes: this one is a sad one so be prepared. ngl i cried while writing this.

not spell checked!

first loves always came and went. at least that is what you had heard since your were a kid. truthfully you had never cared much when your mom said that, even when you were fifteen and you were at the age in which most fell in love for the first time. you'd never cared to listen because you weren't in love. you couldn't understand when she would tell you that your first love will be painful and it will probably make you want to never fall in love again but you would. you never understood it.

until you met Natalie Scatorccio. it had been love at first sight. it was cliche and sounded stupid to anyone else but you didn't expect anyone to understand.

you had tried out for the soccer team per your fathers request. you weren't really interested in it but he was a man that loved sports and you were an only child so he didn't have a son to share his passion with. he didn't force you, simply suggested that it would be fun. even if you weren't the greatest or knew much about it, he insisted that you were on the track team and that you would make new friends and memories that would last you a lifetime. maybe he was right about one thing. you were sure Natalie would be engraved into your memory until your dying breath.

she hadn't paid much attention to you at first, you guys weren't in the same social class so she figured you'd be snobby and bitchy. that was until coach Ben had paired her up with you to help you on some of the skills you were lacking. that had been the first time you had talked, the first time you weren't left admiring her beauty. she was nice. or indifferent, mostly. she knew you hung out with the 'popular' kids and that your parents were rich and she didn't want to tension to form on the team so she figured being quiet would be easier to deal with you.

that was the case at first. until the girls on the team started to hang out outside of practice. Jackie said it was to make you guys bond but you would've loved to be around them regardless. you were closer to Lottie and Jackie, both closer to your social status which meant you shared a lot of friends. you had thrown a party one October night and invited all of the girls on the team. all of them had gone except for Misty, you weren't the biggest fan of her and you assumed she felt the same about you considering you had caught her sending glares at you more than once during or after practice. sometimes even in the hallways which really weirded you out. you'd never been mean to her or said anything, really. whatever her deal was, you didn't care to investigate.

that night you had gotten drunk and got a little too bold. more so then you were used to. you had kissed people before during parties or even got close to hooking up but you'd always stop, not really wanting to give up your virginity to some loser or a girl that probably had a boyfriend and would ditch you the next day. but Natalie wasn't one of those girls. she didn't have a boyfriend, she wouldn't ditch you the next morning or act as if she were straight and you had somehow forced her to do something. she was Natalie.

it was two in the morning when the party was over and you felt her lips all over your body. you weren't that drunk, your thoughts and sentences were coherent. you didn't want to drink much because you had a game the next day and didn't want to slack off. Natalie seemed to have felt the same. you could taste some vodka on her but she seemed pretty sober to you. aside from the alcohol you weren't sure if she had gotten high or something but that didn't really bug you. her wandering hands were making your thighs squeeze together along with her wet lips. she left a couple hickeys on your neck but nothing you couldn't cover the next morning with some makeup.

her hands were everywhere, gripping all over and discarding all of your clothes until you were only left in your underwear. you'd never forget the look in her eyes. it wasn't just lust or hunger, there was a glimmer of something else but a part of you thought you were just imagining it. in a way it was just to make yourself believe that there was a chance. that night before things could progress any further you had told her it was your first time. a part of you expected her to feel awkward and pull away, leaving you there nude and chest heaving. she didn't. she kissed you softly, unlike all of her other kisses and asked you if you were sure. you answered by pulling her into a deep kiss.

Natalie had been the one to make you feel that bliss for the first time. she had been the one to take that part of you and you had no regrets. it didn't matter that she wasn't there when you woke up or that she would kiss you before or after practice once you were alone. it didn't matter that she'd sneak into your room at night to fuck then leave before you had awaken. it didn't matter that she didn't love you because at least you had her. in sone fucked up way you had her. you knew you were the only person she was hooking up with, she had confirmed that early one when you asked about stds and if you should get checked. that made you feel ecstatic, knowing she only ever came to you.

sweat stuck to your body as if you had just gotten out of the shower. your hair was messy and tangled and you could feel your body growing sore from the aftershock of what had just happened. her hand was holding yours tightly from under the sheets and it was probably as sore as your body from every time you'd squeeze it a little too tight. it was silent apart from your ragged breath. your chest was falling and rising heavily and the blankets were making your body feel overheated.

then Natalie popped out from underneath the blankets with a small smirk as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. it was a sight your sure you'd never get tired of. when she was at your level, you could see her bare chest and her hair was almost as frazzled as yours from when you had tangled your hands in it. the cocky smirk she was wearing made you roll your eyes and softly punch her shoulder.

"shut up," you said, a blush coating your cheeks. your face was already pink from the intercourse but even then, your blushing was more than obvious and it made Natalie stop for a second.

"i didn't do anything," she chuckled holding her hands up. you rolled your eyes while pulling the cover further up your body.

"you didn't have to," you responded. "i know what your thinking."

the blondes eyebrow rose in question and she held herself up with one hand, looking down at you. some of her hair fell down her face and you could feel it softly tickle your face so you reached up and tucked it under her ear. the action earned a small, almost ghosting smile on the blondes lips that if you weren't looking, you would have missed. "what am i thinking?" the blonde questioned in a murmur. it was the tone she'd use to try and get you to bed, the tone she'd use when she had hand down your pants or when she would want to leave you hot and bothered. the tone that made you realize she wanted more. "how hot you are after cumming on my tongue?"

almost immediately you felt your face warm up, "shut up." you whispered, very obviously embarrassed. Natalie chuckled softly and you leaned up to kiss her softly. it was always that way with you, her kisses were almost always rough and fast, filled with passion and lust while yours were slow and loving. it was something she couldn't stand, something that always made her run away.

much like she did that night. Natalie pulled away from your a second after and got up and off the bed although faster then you could open your eyes. it wasn't unusual and yet somehow it still surprised you. it was pathetic and almost comical how you'd always be left in shock, processing the way she had just made you feel euphoric and then miserable in the matter of literal seconds.

when you did open your eyes, you were met with sight of her pulling her jeans up. her bra was on by then and you could see that she had fixed her hair. and like always, you stupidly asked the same thing you always did, "want to stay? my parents won't be home for a while and i can drive you home tomorrow." you said, hope filled in your tone. hope that meant nothing, hope that broke your heart, the same hope that had no room in you after so many rejections.

Natalie shook her head as she reached for her shirt, "cant." she said simply. as if it were the most indifferent thing, as if it mattered less than a penny on the street. because you didn't matter, not really. you were someone who she had fun with, the girl that would let her do anything she wanted whenever she wanted. it didn't matter if it was two in the morning or the middle of third period, you'd wake up or sneak out of class just for her. even if you were exhausted or taking a test. she was more important then anything and everything.

you were fun and adventurous and liked to do new things. not to mention the fact that you were pretty and had a nice car and almost always had weed, all things Natalie loved. the only things she ever really noticed. she never saw the way your eyes would always find hers in the middle of a crowded room, never saw the way youd always defend her name with your friends that she'd call snobby. never noticed what your favorite song was or the fact that you loved romcoms because they showed the love you craved. never noticed what your favorite flowers were or that you scrunched your nose when you thought something was adorable. she never cared to notice that you loved her.

it wasn't new and it shouldn't hurt by how many times she had done it and yet it still did. it still left your chest tightening and your throat burning as it would when you'd silent your sobs. it left your eyes burning as if you were having a staring contest with someone and desperately needed to blank. it still left that dread in your stomach, the one you'd feel before getting the results of a test and the one that would leave you feeling sick.

when she was fully dressed, neither of you said a word. she didn't have anything to say while you were trying to keep any emotion a secret. you didn't bother trying to promise yourself that this was just her hiding her feelings, that this was her too afraid to love you back. they were so overused they did more hurt then comfort.

your eyes never left her, not when she turned toward you fully dressed and said, "see you." before leaving without another word or a glance back. when your door closed behind her, it all came pouring out. there was no more hiding it, no more keeping your emotions at bay. you just weren't strong enough for that anymore.

a week after that night, all of your lives changed for the worst.

the plane fell on your way to nationals. what was supposed to be a quick plane ride turned into all of your being stranded in a forest with no hope of being found. at first most of you did but as the days went on all of you started to lose hope progressively. you tried to keep a positive mind but it failed you. there was no point in having hope when you'd just get let down. you didn't have any major injuries, just a couple scratches but nothing that wouldn't heal with time. three days into being stranded Taissa found a lake which followed to finding a cabin. it was nice. at least nicer than having to sleep outside with all sorts of animals.

a lot had changed. most of your relationships had at least. you grew closer to Shauna and Taissa during the short time you'd been there. you half expected to get closer to Natalie and maybe free the reigns she felt from being able to call you guys official. you hoped that without prying eyes and the need to conform to social status that maybe she could take your relationship seriously. you were wrong. so incredibly wrong and it hurt. instead of getting closer to you she was getting closer to Travis. of course she would choose him over you, it wasn't even surprising at that point.

she chose a random guy she had just met to grow feelings for rather than you. the person who had been there everyday. the person who would welcome her with open arms or needed a quick fuck in the middle of the night. you had been there as much as she allowed you to be but of course that still wasn't enough.

the night sky was littered with lights as the full moon reflected on the water. Natalie stood behind you with her arms wrapped around your waist. there were still times in which she would show you affection, mostly when she was angry at Travis or the other way around and this was one of those times. you knew it was toxic and that it was only hurting you but somehow you couldn't stop yourself. having her even just in these small moments was enough. she could never be yours but she was yours, just for that moment. maybe that could be enough.

her lips were being pressed against your neck, her hands softly caressing at your hips making you smile softly. you turned your body around so you could face her completely, your hands finding the back of her neck so you could pull her into a soft kiss.

even if you knew she'd ignore you tomorrow morning, even if you knew that she'd go back to pining over Travis as if he put the stars in the sky for her. even if you'd end up with a broken heart because at least you'd have small moments like these engraved in your memories.

the post orgasm haze was still present and Natalie was aware of that so she placed her hands on the back of your thighs which made you wrap your legs around her waist and let her carry you. her lips were hungry and hot. your lips were grazing her teeth and you could feel a bruise forming, her hands were under your buttocks to keep you from falling and her grasp was strong and rough. everything always was with her, she'd leave marks on you, ones you couldn't cover because of how dark they were or she'd leave bruises on your body. never unwanted and the pain always made you climax faster. but they were marks, ones that came from her and you hated them. what at first made you blush when you'd look at them turned into a sick feeling forming in your stomach and your chest compressing. they weren't anything to be proud of because at the end of the day, she'd never let you leave even a scratch on her.

your body was spent but when she reached down to press her fingers against you, you didn't stop her. a moan left your lips but it was swallowed by her eager lips. the feeling of it all was too much and it made you grip the back of her neck tightly. when she pulled away, it wasn't far. her lips met your neck where they began to leave wet kisses before it turned into sucking and biting. "fuck Nat," you moaned. that made her proud and you could almost feel her smirk against your skin.

maybe you should have realized that you made her feel good. before during  and after sex, you made her feel good. while she only gave you two out of three, she'd always have the advantage of knowing that you were hers while you could only have her when she was horny.

then she began to put more pressure which elicited a small gasp from you. "your doing so good," she praised softly against your neck. those words always made the hairs on your skin to rise and a wave of pleasure to corse through you. all things she knew and always took advantage of.

those words seemed to click something in you. what would once make you quiver made everything click. you were good, good to her. she liked that. she knew how you felt. it was obvious to anyone with eyes. when you'd ask her to spend the night, when you'd listen to the same music she did so you could talk about something, when you'd bring in an extra snack so she had something to eat before practice. the way you would smile at her in the hallways and how all of the sudden no one talked shit to her.

all of those thoughts made you each your breaking point. the pleasure turned numb and all you could focus on was the way tears began to fall and a sob was going to escape your throat. the feelings you had been keeping inside for so long were slowly seeping through the cracks of the border you made around your heart. every memory, every word she had said to make that wall grow higher and higher was starting to launch against it like a bomb. she had been the one to bring those walls up so high and she'd be the one to break them.

Natalie noticed right away. she felt a tear drop against her shoulder and your chest stuttered against her own. when she pulled away from your neck, her eyes met your teary ones and she stopped instantly. "what's wrong? did i hurt you?" she asked worriedly. her brows were pinched together and you could see the way her lips were pulled into a small frown. she was worried and she cared for you. in that moment at least.

yes, you wanted to say. 'you hurt me' was all you could think but you couldn't say it. maybe she hadn't meant to hurt you, maybe she never realized how you felt about her. all things you so badly wanted to believe so you could stop the horrible feeling in your chest. but you shook your head and a cry left your lips. Natalie reached up to wipe away your tears and in that moment, her touch was so soft and loving that maybe things could change. maybe she could feel the same.

maybe she was just scared to admit how she felt or to get attached so she did what everyone always did, pull away from the person you love. and so the words left your lips like acid, as if they burned so terribly she couldn't bare even touching you. "i love you."

they were said. the words you had thought about for so long were finally in the air and they had been heard by her. there was no more hiding, no more keeping your feelings a secret. there was nothing that could unsay those words and nothing that could make her unhear them. for a second you almost thought she hadn't heard you by her lack of reaction but when she pulled away from you and your body almost fell if it weren't for you quick reaction, you knew.

even in the darkness you could see the way her face flashed in disgust and the way all and any trace of worry evaporated. nothing but confusion and disgust was present.

nothing could explain how desperately you wished to take those words back in that moment.

"what?" she said almost laughing. it was a fleeting moment, a moment in which she almost thought you were joking but then she realized how hurt you looked and that thought vanished.

"Natalie-" you took a step toward but she immediately took one back, as if you'd kill her if she didn't. the action intensified the already burning sensation in your throat and the lack of oxygen in your lungs. it burned to breathe, it hurt to blink and to even think.

"why would you do that?" she shook her head, confusion written all over her features.

"do what?" you asked, just as confused.

Natalie shook her head once more and her eyes broke away from yours, "why would you say that?"

her words didn't make the confusion go away, "because i mean it." you responded quickly. because you couldn't keep it a secret anymore and because you almost thought she'd say it back.

Natalie turned away from you, her back toward you. more tears fell at her actions and you wanted to wrap your arms around her but you didn't, unsure if she'd react badly. "fuck." the blonde almost screamed but she was still loud and her tone was harsh.

"how do i not love you?" you pressed, "i let you see me in way no one else has. i've spent almost every night with you for the past four months. you are fucking amazing and if you could just see that-"

"stop!" Natalie exclaimed and finally turned around. "stop saying that, stop talking." she snapped.

that hurt like a bullet. it hurt more than anything ever had and all you could feel were more tears fall. the pain was unexplainable, indescribable. it was a cliche almost because it truly felt like someone had held a gun up to your chest and didn't stop shooting until the clip was empty. not to mention the lump in your throat that burned, especially the way in which you were trying to silent your sobs.

the blonde ran her hands down her face roughly, "this was just sex," she said motioning between you and her. "i told you that from the beginning."

her words made a laugh ripple from your throat, "are you serious?" disbelief was present in your voice. "how do i stop myself from falling Natalie? do you want me to just turn off my emotions? to numb myself from any feelings? because i fucking cant! i cant just act like sex meanings nothing! as if being intimate with you doesn't mean anything!" you yelled, careless to if anyone could hear. because in your mind it was just you and her. in that moment no one else existed and you weren't stranded in the woods, you were simply standing in front of the girl you loved most and the girl who would break you heart completely.

Natalie's face didn't change. there was still nothing but anger present on her features, "if i could do it. so could you." the blonde said finally. and that was it. that was the final bullet the blonde needed to completely break the dam and all the water to rush out. every single emotion to pour out uncontrollably and infinitely.

there was nothing left to say. there was nothing you could say. nothing that would make her love you or take back the words that she just been said. she didn't love you. that was obvious and if it weren't for that stupid hope you always carried, you wouldn't have been blinded into believing she could feel it when you admitted the words out loud.

every interaction, every time you had sex, every time in which she'd ignore the hope in your tone when you'd ask her to stay or every time you'd look at her hurt when she'd smile at Travis. they were all moments in which she was practically screaming at you to let her go but you so stupidly believed she just didn't want to get hurt. how naive can a human be when in love.

finally, you pulled yourself together as much as you could and pried your teary eyes away from her. with the back of your hand, you roughly wiped the tears away as you began to walk past the blonde and toward the direction in which your clothes were. as soon as you knew she was too far to hear you, every emotion broke loose. your sobs racked your body making it shake and you closed your mouth tightly to prevent the noise from being too loud. you didn't care to wipe at your tears and you let yourself finally feel everything you so desperately needed to months ago.

leaving with Taissa and the couple of girls wasn't a hard decision. you wanted out of there, you wanted to go back home and simply never see any of them again. you couldn't anymore, you just couldn't. Taissa had a plan, to walk in one direction until you reached something, anything and even though a lot of people were against it, they couldn't exactly argue with her logic. you weren't the only one who wanted to go with Tai, so did Mari, Akhilah, Van and Misty at the last minute. everyone going for the same reason, not being able to wait another moment for help.

you couldn't just sit there with everyone, hoping that someone would find you because the chances were that no one would. if they could, they would've already done it. you were sure your parents thought you had died, wasn't hard to think that. you'd think the same if you were in their position. at first you didn't want them to stop looking, you wanted them to try and try until they searched every possible place but slowly, as the days passed you realized that they deserved happiness. they deserved peace and if they had given up, you couldn't blame them. accepting having lost someone was sometimes easier then thinking what if. you just hoped they'd be able to move on at some point, most likely not soon but at some point at the very least.

Natalie didn't say goodbye. it wasn't surprising. she had asked, no, begged Travis not to go though. you had heard their conversation while packing your own things and suddenly the decision to go didn't sound so bad. at least you wouldn't have to see their longing gaze, see them come back from hunting with love sick smiles and you wouldn't have to endure Natalie avoiding you as if even looking in your direction would kill her.

as expected, she simply ignored you after that night in the lake. what was once her dragging you away in the middle of the night turned into silence. sometimes she'd hold your hand until you fell asleep because she knew how hard it was for you to do so. now you held your own hand, whispered to yourself that you were okay and the panic attack you were enduring would go away.

when you hugged Lottie, Shauna and Jackie goodbye, the blonde didn't step up once. she stood back and watched. watched as they held you with fear and desperation. they hugged you so tightly, it almost crushed your ribs. they found the small comment quite funny, even through their tears when you said it. then it was time to leave and the only thing you got was her eyes meeting yours for less then a second before you turned around and left.

things were complicated with Taissa and the group, the compass stopped working and there was some blood river that apparently Lottie had dreamed of. and then you ran into an obstacle. a huge one at that. after walking for so long all of you needed a break so you stopped at a certain place in which Tiassa deemed best. one of them started a fire, you were too exhausted to remember who and when your eyes closed.. well everything turned for the worst.

wolves were something you’d see on tv, something you never thought you’d see up close but then again, there were a lot of things you didn’t think you’d do and you had to in the forest. that included shoving Vanessa Palmer out of the way so you’d get the worst of a bite. if only you had known that she’d get it pretty bad anyway. just not as bad as you.

all you could feel was pain. pain, pain, pain. everywhere, on your bloody leg, your bloody arm and it ran through your whole body. what could you do? what were you going to do? you didn’t know. death seemed inevitable in that moment, death seemed like the only answer, like the easier answer. suddenly death sounded peaceful, it sounded… like home.

but neither of the girls were going to leave you behind, even when you begged, even when you cried that it hurt, even when you passed out from the pain. why? because you were y/n l/n, the girl who would make them all laugh even after a bad game, the one who always worked with the team and never showed off or gloated, the one who saved Vanessa Palmer from being burned to death. so it didn’t matter how much you fought, how much you insulted them for not being smart and simply leaving you. none of it mattered because it would mean leaving you to die and they could never do that.

it was hard. so fucking hard. Van had a gash on her face but it wasn’t anything too bad, just enough for her to bleed through the cloth wrapped around her head. she and Taissa were the ones helping you, each of them having one of your arms wrapped around their necks. it was easier to walk at first, maybe it was the adrenaline or the fact that you still had blood in you. but as the sun set and you dragged your leg for miles, that blood kept gushing, that blood kept leaving your body until you were left sickly pale and your eyes could barely stay open.

death was inevitable. your born knowing you’d die, it’s the cycle of life. but dying at eighteen wasn’t part of that cycle, it wasn’t supposed to happen. kids are supposed to burry their parents, not the other way around. everyone wakes up knowing they could die that day but you never think it to be true. just like you didn’t think that would be the day you’d die.

but what if dying is the easy way out? what if dying then is easier then dying months from then when your traumatized and starved. what if dying them is easier when you still have the memory of your parents features and voice clear in your mind. what if dying then.. is the only way out. then maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. your parents wouldn’t have to bury you and maybe just maybe, if the girls are ever found, they would have already mourned you and knowing of your death wouldn’t hurt so badly.

until you realized.. you’d be dying hating Natalie. you’d be dying with the words she said to Travis replaying in your head. you’d be dying with her last words being that you were pathetic for loving her. you’d be dying with a broken heart all while knowing the last time you kissed her was also the last time you loved her.

could you die like that? could you die not knowing what being loved felt like? could you die before you healed your first heartbreak? that wasn’t fair. how could that be fair? how could you die knowing you’d never be loved? knowing you’d never love someone and be loved unconditionally. you’d never have a fairytale love, the kind that brings you flowers and chocolates or dedicates a song to you. the kind of love that hurts because of how much you both love each other. equally.

at some point, you blacked out. you weren’t sure when it happened or how it even happened, it was probably the blood though. all you knew was that one second you could hear your name along with Van and Tais being called before your eyelids grew heavy and everything went black. then you were warm.. and there was a hand holding yours tightly. there were droplets hitting your skin and you could feel someone’s face pressed up against your own as they sobbed loudly.

it was when you found the strength to wake up.

Natalie. it was Natalie who was holding you. her scent was unmistakably hers. it was always vanilla and cigarettes except this time there wasn’t much of the cigarettes but even then.. it was Natalie. your Natalie.

when your eyes lulled awake, she broke apart just a little so she could meet your eyes. “hey it’s okay. Misty’s looking at your leg.” she said. you knew. she knew too but her desperation wouldn’t let her see that. but you didn’t tell her that.

“guess i kind of lost to a wolf, huh?” you tried to joke but your sentence wasn’t completed without a couple of coughs and wheezes.

Natalie tried to smile through her tears but you could see the pain behind her eyes. “i lied.” she said quickly. you knew it then too. somehow you had each become a cliche, one you wished to never be. “i didn’t mean any of those things. i didn’t think i deserved you. your so amazing and kind and you make everyone feel safe and i didn’t deserve that. i don’t deserve you so i pushed you away because i knew i’d end up breaking you.” she continued. her tears were falling desperately, they were one after another and you couldn’t help but reach up with your healthy hand and wipe them away. when you did, her hand held yours against her face. she felt so warm compared to your freezing touch and it felt so safe.

“i thought that pushing you away would be better, that you’d get over me and find someone worthy of you.” she continued. you knew what was coming next. you knew what she would say and in a fucked up way, you couldn’t bring yourself to hear them. not like this and not then.

“don’t.” you shook your head. the color from your face was gone, leaving nothing but a pale and discolored shade. your warm and inviting eyes were slowly fading. your smile was weak and it wasnt the one that would make everyone around you smile with you.

Natalie shook her head, “i love you.” she finally said. she said it. the words you had been wanting to hear for so long where finally said and you were dying. how was that fair? how could that ever be fair? why didn’t you deserve love? why couldn’t you have a love so beautiful that when you took your last breath, at least you knew you experienced that love once in your life.

it wasn’t supposed to be like that. she was supposed to say those words in the starlit night, with nothing but water around you and the intimacy of having her nude body pressed up against yours. you were supposed to kiss her until neither of you could breathe and you were supposed to whisper in her ear to prove just how much she loved you. your love was supposed to be meaningful, your love story deserved to be longer, to be sweeter, to last. it was supposed to be for the books.

instead your bleeding out in her arms with your last moment being her screaming at you that loving her was pathetic.

the words had been said and there was nothing left to do. nothing you could do but weakly pull her down so she could kiss you. what was always rushed and passionate kisses was a slow and weak one. your warm lips weren’t skilled and sensual, they were just another reminder of your ticking time. but that didn’t matter. not to you and not her. it would be the last kiss you shared, the last time she’d feel you pour your love into it, the last time she’d feel your hand caressing her face and the last time she’d feel this.

when she pulled away, there were tears in your eyes too. you weren’t ready to die. every thought you had before was gone. you weren’t ready. you still wanted to hug your parents again, you wanted to go to college with the girl you loved, you wanted to have more time with Natalie and all of your friends. you weren’t ready to die but it was useless.

and for the last time ever, “i love you, too.” you managed to weakly whisper. the heart that would beat so rapidly when you last said those words was slow and weak. she could barely feel a hum against your chest. how could she have been so selfish? why didn’t she enjoy the way your heart hammered against your chest when she’d lay on it? after you’d have sex and you’d press your body against here? when you told her you loved her? why didn’t she memorize the rhythm of your heart? why why why?

it was time. you know it. it was getting hard to breathe and the more you tried, the more it hurt. with as much strength as you could muster, you whispered. “remember me, sometimes.” they were lousy words but they were the only thing you wanted. even if it wasn’t always, you at least wanted to be remembered sometimes. maybe when she listened to Queen since it was the only artist you shared. maybe in lillie’s, like the ones you always had in your room. maybe when she looked at the sky or when she thinks the best thing to do is to push the person she loves away. you’ll be the reminder to never take love for granted.

Natalie cried at your words, those words that left a whole in her heart, the words that would leave scars and wounds she’d never be able to heal. “you’ll be the only thing i’ll remember.” she said back. her words made your lips curl just a tad.

then it happened. you took your final breath. your heart stopped breathing. your eyes were left lifeless and your touch slipped from her face. there was nothing left but your lifeless body in her own.

finally, everything she held in while you were with her was finally let out. her sobs were so loud and she didn’t care that everyone in the room could see. that everyone was silently watching with tears in their own eyes. she clutched your body so tightly against her chest, almost as if you’d move away. her cries were so loud they were like a howl on a full moon.

her body rocked with your lifeless body in her arms. crying, screaming, sobbing. her cries of pain were nothing short of heartbreaking. every fiber of her being hurt. she was in fucking agony.

she couldn’t accept it, she wouldn’t. her hand softly shook your face and when you didn’t react, she put you on the ground gently before she began to pump your chest with her hands. her tears kept running down her face and landing on your body as she continued to press against your chest in a steady rhythm. that stupid song in the back of her head. she was trying her fucking hardest. why wasn’t that enough? no one dared to say a thing, not even Travis who stood back and watched with tears in his eyes.

it didn’t matter how much she tried, you didn’t wake up. not after a minute, not after two and not after three. even when she begged, “please come back.” she whispered through her actions. until finally, she stopped. when she did, her shaky hands reached your face and she gently cradled it. she memorized every freckle, every eyelash, every little mark on your face. she memorized the way your lips felt under her fingertips and the color of your eyes. the eyes that would never look at her again. the eyes that she wouldn’t meet across the room, the eyes that wouldn’t look at her in pain, ever again. the eyes she ignored so many times. she felt so fucking stupid then.

but they weren’t your eyes. not anymore so she shakily closed them. when she did, she slowly buried her face in your chest. her arms holding you tightly as she cried softly. as she remembered your scent, as she felt your body in her arms for the last time ever.

Natalie Scatorccio was completely and utterly heartbroken.

you were dead. even when you weren’t ready to. but at least you loved her until your dying breath.

[realbeefman]

list of every hyperspecific Thing i find supremely awesome and compelling in fiction that is present in Like Minds (2006) (for fellow freaks to reference) (also because i LOVE LISTS)

- UNRELIABLE NARRATOR!!!!! <3 <3 <3

- psychologist diagnosing patient blurs professional and personal boundaries

- Logical and talented female protag experiences workplace situationship with absolute loser of a man

- weird religious lore from the middle ages becomes a fixation/obsession

- cutting up bodies surgical style

- incest but not really but kind of but maybe but its unclear and probablyy not. but in a way.

- necrophilia!! but maybe not? but maybe?

- vaguely problematic framing of Clearly queercoded antagonist as predatory

- MURDER INVESTIGATIONNNN <3 UNWINDING THE TALE AS THE STORY GOESSSS

- absolutely absurd and outrageous levels of lying deceit betrayal and hypocrisy

- trains. and their best friend the TRACKS

- TAXIDERMY <3

- catholic school. BOARDING school nonetheless

- crawling around in the house’s guts to uncover the secrets

- “bible”

- crying in the rain

- guy who has the vibe of a crow that became a person

- bitchy spoiled rich kids behave like bitchy spoiled rich kids

- insane unfulfilled unstated homoerotic tension. obviously

- friendsless antisocial freaks cant live without each other

- abusive cop who is crazy and immoral was right BUT only detected the Evil due to the fundamental Evil that lives within him too

- killing your parent who you have a complicated relationship with instead of just. idk perhaps having a talk.

- fire reflecting on character’s face during deeply emotionally charged convo

- Oh no! We’ve been forced to participate in the School Play!

- casually blowing shit up for fun #boredom

[rebelspykatie]

RWRB Steddie AU - Part 1

Wayne Munson who accidentally won the presidency running on a progressive working class ticket. Eddie Munson, the first son that causes international incidents without even trying. Like the time he made a crude hand gesture towards a foreign dignitary thinking he was saluting them. Or the time he connected his phone to the speakers during a dnc event and blasted Metallica through the entire arena. Or the time he knocked over a child on the lawn of the White House during the annual Easter egg hunt and had to issue an apology to a five year old for stealing their eggs. 

Wayne has reprimanded him more than he’s spoken in front of Congress. The secret service hates him, especially Hopper, who has to drag him back inside when he tries to escape down the trellis and cockblocks him from flirting with the barista at the Starbucks right outside of the White House. 

But nobody hates him more than Prince Steven. He doesn’t even understand why Steve hates him, only that their first interaction was disastrous, leaving Eddie fuming and confused. He remembers seeing Steve all over those teen magazines before Wayne had any political aspirations, his now gorgeous locks once too big for his tiny head and hazel eyes staring back at him from the glossy pages. Gareth never let him hear the end of it when he found those magazines tucked away under his bed, a collection that only grew over the years as Steve got more attractive.

The frosty reception from Steve had Eddie doubting every good thing those magazines ever said about how charming the prince could be. Sure, not a single hair was out of place on his stupid head and his polos were ironed within an inch of their lives, but his smile was fake and a bitchy retort slipped out of his mouth before Eddie could even introduce himself. 

He gave up on playing nice after that, not heeding his Uncle’s advice to stay away and not cause another international scandal while he was trying to make a deal with their prime minister. He practically begged Eddie to keep his big, dumb mouth shut.

Which is of course why The Incident happened. Eddie was a bit too drunk at a dinner for diplomats and their families. He approached Steve and started going on about the monarchy, a bit too loudly, where a very nosy reporter could hear. And that reporter wrote a scathing article about the first son not believing in tradition and how he was trying to undermine the authority of the crown, dredging up old tweets about how useless monarchies are and how Steve is handed things on a silver spoon. 

Wayne’s deal is in jeopardy, so he’s sent to smooth over international relations with the crown, which is a horrible idea considering Eddie’s track record. Staged photo ops have always made Eddie uncomfortable, but he sucks it up for Wayne. He winds up enjoying himself more than he thought possible in Steve’s presence because one of their PR stops is at a teen center where a group of kids regularly plays dnd. 

If it weren’t for a swift tug on the back of his suit from Hopper, Eddie would be standing on the table flailing around about a campaign, having already forgotten about the swath of reporters following them around on this tour. Steve doesn’t appear to know anything about dnd, but the little curly headed boy with an infectious toothy smile keeps tugging him around, talking a mile a minute while Steve fondly rolls his eyes. It’s the most relaxed Eddie has ever seen him. 

He learns that they’re both insomniacs during that trip, stumbling into the kitchen at 2am only to find Steve already there, riffling through the pantry. It’s the first time he’s ever seen Steve without the ramrod straight posture, notices the circles under his eyes and the way he’s always got a line of tension in his jaw. They come to some kind of truce in the dark of night over twin bowls of cereal. Something inside of Eddie unfurls at that, lets go of whatever weird grudge he was holding after their first interaction. 

It starts with a text. Steve sends him an article with the most ridiculous picture of Eddie, asks if he wakes up looking like that every morning. They’re teasing each other, taunting remarks about their status, realizing they have more in common than they thought. All summer, Eddie’s eyes are glued to his phone, anticipating texts from HRH (his royal hairiness), late nights dedicated to learning everything about Steve. Chrissy, the vice president’s daughter, corners him before the annual Halloween Party, forces him to invite his new friend Steve. She says it with a tone he doesn’t really understand, but it’s one that brooks no argument.

Maybe he learns all too well what Chrissy meant when it’s close to midnight and Steve pushes him against a tree outside and kisses him so thoroughly Eddie’s lost all oxygen to his brain. It changes the course of his entire life. He can’t stop thinking about it, feels the phantom taste of Steve on his tongue, but Steve isn’t answering his calls and Eddie doesn’t get a chance to corner him until a charity event almost a month later. 

They take each other apart that night, spend hours learning each other's bodies. Confessions spilled into the sheets they’re tangled in. Steve admits that his father arranged for him to be seen with Nancy Wheeler, who he has no interest in. They decide to try something casual, see each other when they can, get some much needed relief from the public eye. But Eddie’s never been the casual type, and he doesn’t think Steve is either, not after their nightly talks. He falls hard and eagerly hopes for more every time they meet up, wishing that Steve wouldn’t flee from his bed the next morning. 

Wayne’s pretty busy, running a country and all, but he eventually puts the pieces together on Eddie’s disappearances and his trips coinciding with events where Steve is present. His uncle knows him better than to think they’re just friends. Eddie never really had to come out to his Uncle, but they do have an intense talk on whether he’s ready to be perceived in that way by everyone in the world, Wayne apologizing for putting him in the spotlight. 

But Eddie feels forever about Steve. And Wayne’s presidency brought him to this man, to the love of his life, so there’s no way he could be upset about any of it.

If only Steve felt forever about him.

Part 2

[priceforrottenjudgement]

Ive seen a lot of bitching about hotd in the tag, which surprised me bc there was none of this two weeks ago and now all these ppl are acting like season 2 sucks and its badly written and its rewriting the books and bla bla. This surprised me, so i did a little snooping

Like. First off, isnt grrm consulting them this time? I know he was doing it for s1 and im sure i read he was doing s2 too. I cant say anything about bad writing, tbh i havent examined it that closely bc nothing about pacing or dialogue has bothered me enough to spend time thinking about it.

The "its not like the book!!!" Thing really bothers me though bc have you read the book? Lmao im not so sure bc some of the stuff you complain about is so weird, also how did you miss that fire & blood has deeply unreliable narrators? It literally says gyldayn is an unreliable narrator on the Wikipedia, hes taking a bunch of biased sources and kind of patches the history of house targaryen together. If you had read the book, youd KNOW that it isnt a definitive chronicle and stuff was likely altered, embellished and left out. Some of the alterations make sense, because why would some maester know about these ppls private lives. Fire and blood is full of propaganda, rumours and bias. Also the stuff that WAS changed isnt really that deep? I really like the change to the rhaenicent dynamic (ill come back to this, theres a reason ppl seem to hate this change lmao), i dont care about maelor and the nettes changes dont bother me that much? (Some ppl are convinced rhaena will get the ENTIRE nettles storyline. Which would indeed suck cough cough, but i dont think thats where theyre going at all lmao)

So i took a look at some of the other opinions of ppl who really really HATE s2 and, WOOOOOOWWWWW,there sure is a lot of homophobia on the yuri Website huh? All of a sudden it makes sense why these ppl popped up 2 weeks ago huh? (And why theyre so bitchy about the changes to alicents character not being a wicked stepmother but more of an... almost lover) Wow, what a fucking pathetic reason to be a hater. Awww nooooooooo this female character is kissing women noooo, theyre ruined!! Even though the relationship was kind of maybe sort of a little implied in the book. (Granted the book talks about a close relationship between rhaenyra, mysaria and DAMON, but see above for rumours and inaccuracies) Also there are a lot of ppl who were genuinely Team green (i did not realise those ppl existed unironically, gonna be honest) who are mad that Team green is portrayed more negatively than Team black and apparently thats unfair. Yeah, idk what to say about that, do you always expect to opposing sides of a fictional conflict to be treated the same and to be equally good and justified? Granted, the "pick a side" Marketing was dumb and encouraged this sort of thinking, but those two teams are not equal lol you can still like the characters even though theyre cheaters, usurpers and Bad ppl.

If you had genuinely read and UNDERSTOOD the books and that theyre full of propaganda you would understand why SOME PPL are either portrayed more positively or more negatively in the show than they were in the book. Just consider WHO was writing the history for one sec.

Yeah, rant over, this was just too ridiculous not to get off my chest.

Like yeah, you can criticise some of the changes and the simple fact that 8 ep seasons are SHIT for building a plot, but considering some ppl call an ep "filler" just because nobody got roasted by a dragon, maybe we dont deserve 20 ep seasons with a slow building of plot and tension anymore....

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

omg omg cute little fic about ville meeting stunt girl on the jackass set and both of them just become blubbering messes infront of each other!! But they’re trying to play it so cool infront of all the guys :3 LOVE UR WRITING!!

Diametric Bonds

Ville’s in town on tour and decides to make a visit to the set his friend’s filming in, only to meet a woman who absloutely captivates him.

Ville Valo X Fem!Reader

(Fluff)

1.8k Words

Warnings: Suggestive content, crude language, teasing, tension, flirting, nervousness, anal

An: Thank you so much for the request! I find I write best for stuntgirl!Y/N by think of how I would react in these scenarios XD I was inspired by one of my friends mention that she thought Ville was friends with Bam because he was so different from him, and that led to the whole opposites attract aspect of this fic! Anyways, thank you for reading, and please keep sending requests!

“It’s rather…bondage-y, no?” Ville ran his thumbs up and down the shoulder straps of the shiny new torture device Bam was fitted with after that nollie frontside 180 landed him in the hospital last week. He groaned, slumping the best the harness would allow him to, “Dude- this shit is so lame ass. They got me in this, like- grandpa back brace, and I can’t even skate for two weeks! This is such bullshit…” A thin smile spread across his lips in response to the whining. Despite his bitchiness, Bam was a fun guy to be around, and Ville enjoyed the excitement. You, on the other hand, had grown close to Bam because you had common interests. Since you could half competently stand on a board, you were called in to do some of the skating stunts while he healed up. Over that time, you’d gotten pretty close, which explains why you barged into his trailer.

“Hey, Bam! D’ya wanna- woah…” The stranger standing in his trailer was pretty- too pretty. Covered in grime from whatever you’d just gotten back from filming. you only wanted to grab Bam’s Vicodin for him before Steve-O nabbed it. That is when you stumbled upon the Interview With a Vampire looking piece of chiseled marble that was Ville. “Oh shit- hey!” Still shirtless, Bam threw an arm around you and introduced you the way a proud parent would show off their honor roll kid, “Ville, this here’s Y/N! She’s the raddest chick I've ever met.” Grinning, Bam ruffled your hair, “Taught this little hessian everything she knows!” Rolling your eyes, you scoffed at the sheer quantity of undue credit he was giving himself, but besides the extent of his bullshittng, you kept your mouth shut like a nice friend. Clearly Bam wanted to make himself look good in front of this guy…

Ville extended a pale hand out to you, which you shook. The words fell out of your mouth, “You’ve got soft hands.” He was all gentle touches, nothing like the high fives and pats on the back from the roughed up palms of your crew mates you were used to. That didn’t make it sound any less weird. Lips curling into a confused smile, he replied, “Oh, thank you, my dear…” Feeling the nagging need for clarity, you hurriedly added, “In a good way. I like ‘em!” Bam gaped like a stunned trout at your social bungling.

Politely excusing himself, Bam wadded up a handful of your tank top and yanked you outside the trailer, fumbling with the door. “What the fuck was that?!” Speaking through his teeth, he turned around and exaggeratedly gestured in the air, “‘You’ve got soft hands’- Who says that?” Stammering, you instinctively mirrored his flailing, “I don’t know! How the fuck should I know- I just said it!” You would’ve thought you had dropped your pants in front of the guy and told him to take you now with how Bam was reacting. “You don’t- that’s Ville fucking Valo!” “Who the hell is Ville Valo?”

Squawking the way a pair of old crones might, the two of you were too distracted to notice that the door never managed to get closed- in fact, the thing was wide open when Ville leaned out, listening with wry interest.

You would come to find out that he was on set because his band was touring, and apparently Ville is that cool, Finnish rockstar friend of Bam’s. This was a surprise, as you always assumed he was George Glassing you with that…He just sort of hung around idly, never really engaging. Standing off to one side, Ville would have looked more at home in some gothic Victorian courtyard with purple roses or some shit. Not sitting on a cheap lawn chair next to a cooler, moreso considering the fact that, mere feet away, Steve was showing off this new, inventive way to drink a beer.

“When I stopped by, I didn’t really expect so much, well-“ Cutting him off, Bam interjected, “Butt stuff?” Taking a sip of his beer, Ville shrugged, “Well, I assumed Americans would be more…averse to that sort of thing.” “Nah- nah, they like it. It’s funny!” A cool breeze blew across the hotel rooftop the cast was filming on. Even though you snook a few glances towards him, your attention was pretty squarely on the main event. Most women would be grossed out by this magnitude of anal fascination, but you weren't. However, the fact that you could stand on two feet was only for the fact that you were distracted by the obvious.

Leaning over, he kept his voice quiet as he covertly gestured to you, “That one. Tell me about her.” Taking a frothy swig, Bam didn’t spend too much time on the subject as he didn’t feel any obligation to be your wingman, “I dunno- she’s just…she’s Y/N. Always did her own thing, I guess. She doesn’t get caught up in shit like most chicks do.” Ville had an eye for art, and he found something oddly baroque about that scene in front of him. You were at the center of that landscape. “So,” changing the topic quickly, Bam fiddled with the label on the bottle in his grip, “y’wanna go grab drinks later?” Taking a drag of his cigarette, Ville briefly replied, “Bring your friend.”

It was as if Ville was Bam’s dad and this evening was his plot to introduce him to his new stepmom- at least, that’s how it looked from Bam’s end of the bar. He wasn’t totally third wheeling, but he felt that his rightfully earned attention was being stolen by you, the stuntgirl.

Smiling slyly, there was this understated grace to Ville’s every movement as he took a seat, even as he glanced you up and down, “I enjoy the cheetah print. Very striking.” Smiling, you pretended that you didn’t buy that dress from a secondhand store for tonight, as you didn’t own any nice, going-out clothes. “Aww, thanks! You look good too.” Believe it or not, that awkward compliment was your most bold social acquisition.

The thing that drew you in and pushed you away was that Ville was a civilized human being that didn’t urinate on his buddys’ legs at the bar and smelled like rosewood and Marlboro Lights instead of sweat and weed stink. You didn’t know how to talk to someone who would know sophistication if it hit them over their head. “So…I’ve heard you make music?” Bam cringed at having to witness this but, disarming as always, Ville humored your attempts at conversation.

Later in the evening, he excused himself to have a word with the band in between sets, slipping off to a dark corner of the bar and leaving you and Bam to chat amongst yourselves. “I can’t watch this…” feigning offense, you spat back, “Hey! If you care so much, why don’t you flirt with him instead?” You only said that because you knew it would get under Bam’s skin. Batting your eyelashes, you made kissy noises and mocked him in a high pitched falsetto, “Oh, Ville! Let’s run away to Finland together and suck eachother’s-“

Something caught your ear: this low, velvety murmur. Apparently, since the lead of the band knew who Ville was, they invited him to join them for a song or two. His voice rasped deliciously up your spine, and there was something in the way his eyes never seemed to leave yours that drew you in with this smoldering intensity. Rendered speechless, you smiled to yourself and murmured to nobody in particular, “I know you said he was a good singer, but damn…” Assuming Ville was singing to him, Bam sputtered as he was shaken out of his trance, “‘Pretty good’- this guy’s the best thing to happen to music!”

Whenever you were in proximity to Ville, you felt as if you were some bumbling teenage girl with her totally out of her league crush, unbeknownst to the fact he actually felt the same way with you. Yes you, the one with the cargo shorts, and the blotchy purple knees from too many falls, and the messy head of hair that’s missing a few chunks from when you got caught by the clipper cam. He liked you for the same reasons he liked Bam- you’re excitable and wild and everything Ville was not. As much as you harbored feelings for him, he held the same if not more; the only difference was the obvious gap of ability to conceal them.

He played it cool, but no matter where you were filming, Ville managed to drift over to whatever little corner of the set you were at. Presently, that corner was the medic tent. Somehow, as you sat on that deli paper covered table, caked in sweat and dirt, he found you even more beautiful than he did the previous evening when you were all dressed up. Glancing up from where you were icing a sprained wrist, you caught Ville's gaze just in time to make him stumble over his words. “I, uh- Bam told me you had a ‘gnarly’ injury.” Shaken by the idea he would visit you in the first place, you fought off a grin at how obvious his attempts at using your jargon were.

Clearing his throat, he sounded much more comfortable as he continued, “I stopped by to see if you were alright.” Your sore wrist was at the very background of your mind now; you were more concerned with how close he was to your slumped over body and how the elevation of where you sat forced you to meet his gaze. “Oh, uh- thanks! That’s really sweet…” Surprising only to you, the truth of this dynamic became apparent in the awkward silence that hung between you, either party too timid to say anything. However, there was an odd sort of satisfaction and maybe even comfort in seeing that he was equally as nervous as you.

“Well, if you’re not busy tonight,” breaking the silence, he quickly fished around in his pocket, retrieving two slips of paper, “I’ve got a show in the area. Perhaps Bam would like to come as well?” Chuckling to yourself at the notion that Ville was trying to use your friendship with him to get in your good graces, you responded with unfounded quickness, “Well…I think Bam’s busy. But I’m free…”

[lucky-clover-gazette]

prince's gambit highlights & annotations

chapter 2

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

With a rabble like this, Laurent’s pretty face wasn’t doing him any favours. Damen must have heard a dozen slurs and sly insinuations before he’d even saddled his horse. No wonder Aimeric had been furious: even Damen, who had frankly no objection to men slandering Laurent, was finding himself annoyed.

“he’s a bitch but he’s OUR bitch” 😤

They would not be riding in a straight line south. Instead, it was to be a two-week journey southwest through the Veretian provinces of Varenne and Alier, their route hugging the Vaskian mountain border. It was a change from the direct route that had been planned by the Regent, and Laurent had already sent out riders to inform the keeps.

already, damen’s involvement in laurent’s life is starting to mess with the regent’s plans. GOOD.

As the night wore on, Laurent had abandoned his deliberate comportment for a relaxed, youthful pose, drawing one knee up to his chest and slinging an arm around it. Damen had found his gaze drawn to the easy arrangement of Laurent’s limbs, the balance of wrist on knee, the long, finely articulated bones. He had been aware of a diffuse but growing tension, a sensation almost like he was waiting . . . waiting for something, unsure what it was. It was like being alone in a pit with a snake: the snake could relax, you could not.

laurent: literally just vibing during a strategy sesh damen: He Is Going To Bite Me So Hard Any Second Now

If Laurent had slept at all, he hadn’t done so in the Regent’s bed.

>:(

Laurent’s pre-dawn arrival and whatever cold bitchy remarks he had made—sharpened by a night without sleep—had been enough to eject the Regent’s men out of their beds and into a semblance of lines.

There was no immediate disaster.

really setting your expectations high here, damen

Laurent looked like a figurehead, eye-catching and useless.

There was going to be a fortnight of this, with a fight at the end of it. Damen set his jaw, kept his head down and got on with the work he had been assigned. He saw to his horse and his armour. He pitched the Prince’s tent. He moved supplies and hauled water and wood. He washed with the men. Ate. The food was good. Some things were done well. The sentries were posted promptly, and so were the outriders, taking up position with the same professionalism as the guards who had watched him in the palace. The site of the camp was well chosen.

damen should have a tv show where he yassifies military camps to his personal standards. like queer eye

‘I heard you were good at carrying tales. And what will you be doing while Jord stops that fight?’ ‘Getting massaged,’ said Damen, succinctly.

“succinctly”

‘Well? Attend me,’ said Laurent. ‘Attend,’ said Damen. The word sank into him. He felt as he had in the training arena when he had been unwilling to go near the cross. ‘Have you forgotten how?’ Laurent said. He said, ‘The last time, this did not end pleasantly.’ ‘Then I suggest you behave better,’ said Laurent.

It was the normal duty of a body servant to dress and undress his master. Laurent accepted the service with the indifference of one long used to attendance. The opening in the brocade widened, revealing the white of an undershirt pressed warm against skin by the heavy outer fabric, and by armour atop that. Laurent’s skin and the shirt were the exact same delicate shade of white. Damen pushed the garment over Laurent’s shoulders and just for a moment felt, beneath his hands, the hard, corded tension of Laurent’s back.

in a theater au, these two would go fucking crazy doing each other’s mics

On the table was the familiar map, weighted by three oranges and a cup. Arranging himself in the chair opposite Damen, casual in pants and undershirt, Laurent picked up one of the oranges and started peeling it. One corner of the map rolled up. ‘When Vere fought Akielos at Sanpelier, there was a manoeuvre that broke through our eastern flank. Tell me how that worked,’ Laurent said.

this is so domestic ahhhhhhhhhh!!!

He caught the wooden practice sword instinctively when Orlant tossed it to him. ‘You any good?’ ‘Yes,’ said Damen.

yes bitch!

‘That’s right. You don’t like fights,’ said Orlant. ‘You prefer going behind people’s backs.’

is this because he breaks up fights and reports to laurent? tf do you want him to do (fiercely defend his prince, i knowww)

‘Afraid to spar?’ said Orlant. ‘No,’ said Damen. ‘Then what? Can’t fight?’ said Orlant. ‘You’re only here to fuck the Prince?’ Damen swung.

“I CAN DO MULTIPLE THINGS”

Damen supposed he should feel flattered that Laurent had set his best swordsmen to guard him in the palace.

they're so "i can't decide" by the scissor sisters

‘You were looking for me?’ Laurent didn’t answer, and Damen couldn’t interpret his expression. ‘What is it?’ said Damen. ‘You’re better than I am.’ Damen couldn’t help his amused breath of reaction to that, or the long, scrolling look from Laurent’s head to his toes and back again, which was probably a little insulting. But really. Laurent flushed. The colour hit his cheeks hard, and a muscle tightened in his jaw as whatever he felt was forcibly repressed. It was not like any reaction that Damen had ever seen from him before, and he couldn’t resist pushing it a little further. ‘Why? Do you want to spar? We can keep it friendly,’ Damen said. ‘No,’ said Laurent.

this might be the first moment where laurent is clearly flustered by damen in a non-disgusted way. the blush!!! i think laurent finds competence very attractive, especially in areas where he also excels. with some people it can just be a matter of platonic respect, but in this case it’s almost certainly hot to him that damen is such an impressive swordsman—even better than laurent himself.

‘When I fought Govart,’ said Damen, ‘I had my lungs full of chalis.’ Another slow nod. ‘I’m not sure how it is in Akielos,’ said Jord, ‘but . . . you shouldn’t take that stuff before a fight. Slows your reflexes. Saps your strength. Just some friendly advice.’ ‘Thank you,’ said Damen, after a long, drawn out moment had passed.

it doesn’t even occur to jord that laurent drugged damen before the fight. shows how highly he thinks of laurent, and gives us a hint about laurent’s typical behavior when he hasn’t just been jumpscared by his brother’s killer in chains

‘Aimeric’s not a child lured in with a honeyed treat. He’s Guion’s fourth son. He knows that his being here splits his father’s loyalty. It’s half the reason he joined me. He wants his father’s attention,’ said Laurent. ‘If you’re not here to talk to me about Aimeric, why are you here?’

laurent offering aimeric this, like, annoying your elders solidary… it’s strategic for sure, but maybe that’s a tiny part of it too?

I can’t believe you fear Govart. If you did, you’d never have set me against him in the ring.

WAIT so we’ve gone from “laurent hates me and wants me dead” to “i know you didn’t want me dead” ?? i guess it could make sense, though—laurent would have wanted to kill damen himself, right?

‘Why do you give me good advice?’ asked Laurent. Isn’t that why you brought me with you? Instead of speaking those words aloud, Damen said, ‘Why don’t you take any of it?’

this is like dirty talk to me. yessss consider each other as intellectual equals with mutual incredulity

He knew by now that Laurent never acted precipitously, but always walked away and gave himself time and space alone to think.

oh, that’s what you think? note to self: remember this line. it’ll be funny

[deepdeanvsweston]

Here they are! Lavinia/Daisy get together headcannons!

- we all know they're dormmates ofc

- so they know each other through that

- Lavinia is lesbian, and Daisy is a lesbian

- Lavinia realises she likes girls very quickly after Kitty (who is straight as a pole mind you) in first form suggested they practised kissing so they're ready for boys

- Lavinia immediately goes and starts hyperventilating in the bathroom because 'oh god she liked it. She liked it.'

- anyway this happens and she goes on to repress this for the next 4-6 years

- repression queen <3

- despite this, she continues to have weird romantic tension with this girl in their year who's the head of the fifth form hockey team, Jean Munroe

- but Lavinia's like 'it doesn't count. Just because I pushed her up against the changing room and snogged her face off doesn't MEAN anything'

- anyway

- Daisy meanwhile also had Kitty in first form practising kissing

- (Daisy develops a brief one year crush on Kitty)

- but for Daisy it just did not click that she liked girls

- in her head she was like "oh I like this. This is wonderful and I want to do this all my life. Obviously only because Kitty is pretending to be a boy though :)"

- Jolly Foul Play was when everything fell into place for Daisy and she realised she liked girls (Astrid and Margaret fr fr)

- anyway again

- Top Marks For Murder is when Daisy begins to take ✨notice✨ of Lavinia

- she's brash and blunt but Daisy thinks all the stuff Lavinia knows about nature and animals is pretty cool (nature conservationist Lavinia fr fr) and finds her privately quite funny

- (Daisy also thinks she cuts a fine form in her tennis uniform)

- Nothing happens though

- they start skirting round each other after TMFM

- Jean Munroe starts showing up to exeat weekends with a boyfriend and Lavinia on the inside is hurt and embarrassed and scared because she feels like she's been abandoned by everyone she's ever loved and Jean didn't even say she wanted to end it, even if there wasn't anything TO end!

- on the outside Lavinia become Spiky. She's angry, but like I said earlier, she's a repression queen

- she stays furious and sullen and for lack of a better word, bitchy, but she tells herself it's NOT because of Jean, it's not it's not it's not (it is)

- anyway again

- Death Sets Sail happens, Lavinia and George run away to the Spanish War

- Lavinia does ofc go away because of her political beliefs but also because it provides an opportunity to get away from Deepdean, and her parents, and stupid Jean

- her and George split up, she comes back a little more mature but more Lavinia than ever, trains to be an ambulance driver, all the canon stuff

- meanwhile, the war has put a strain on Daisy and Amina's relationship

- WW2 brings up a lot of painful/weird feelings for Daisy, as it sees her mother die and Fallingford get requisitioned, and Stephen is in the news as he's been let out of prison to fight on the front

- so she's going through a lot of shit

- Daisy is... happy? About her mother dying. Or at the very least feels finally free

- Amina does NOT get this, and is in fact a little bit weirded out? She ofc understands Margaret Wells was a terrible mother, but thought Daisy would hold at least a little bit of love for a dead/dying woman

- this causes a big divide when Daisy refuses to go to her funeral and Amina wants her to. They split up

- Daisy goes for a walk to clear her head, and Lavinia is just walking back from the ambulance depot

- "Heard about your mother" Lavinia says

"Who hasn't? It's on the front page of the bloody telegraph" Daisy replies bitterly

"Could've chosen a better family photo. You look terrible"

"She was an utter beastly, bitch"

"Mothers usually are" (Lavinia's mother was... not great either)

"I'll drink to that"

- and they do. They go back to Lavinia and Beanie's shared flat (Beanie is working late at the hospital) and get horrendously drunk and start telling each other how they'd kill their mothers

- 'this is what I needed' Daisy thinks, 'someone who doesn't think I'm a terrible person for hating a dead woman'

- and they end up talking about Deepdean (it's actually one of Daisy's favourite subjects, and bound to come up if she's had a few)

- they start bitching about Clementine, and Lavinia lets slip about her and Jean

- Daisy and Lavinia do a toast "to spiteful cows and our hopes for their downfall!"

- they end up on crushes after Lavinia says about her and Jean, and Daisy now lets slip about Kitty and that essentially she thought Lavinia looked hot in her tennis uniform

- long story short they end up in bed together

- and then. This keeps happening. They keep sleeping together, as well just having huge bitch fests about nearly everyone in their lives

- but they do begin to notice that they no longer have to get drunk to end up sleeping together

- there is Something There

- unfortunately Daisy brings this up and Lavinia's like Nope! Fuck off! Jean Munroe was enough woman for me! Just because I like having sex with women means absolutely fuck all, actually!

- (she's just scared and still hurting about Jean)

- anyway near the end of the war, Lavinia is caught outside in an air raid and gets badly injured

- but she doesn't go to the hospital like a stubborn fool because she thinks other people need and deserve it more

- LAVINIA YOU HAVE A BROKEN ANKLE, A BLEEDING HEAD AND THIRD DEGREE BURNS ACROSS YOUR ABDOMEN GET HELP

- she does, in fact, get help, she may be stubborn but she's not stupid enough to think she doesn't need medical attention

- obviously she ends up at Daisy's flat, I do love myself a bit of hurt/comfort

- Daisy is working late at the ministry though, and so she finds Lavinia collapsed against her door

- gently, she shakes Lavinia and cups her face 'Lavinia? Hey. Vin. Can you hear me?"

- Lavinia sort of groans back so Daisy knows she's semi ok, and helps her into the flat

- she sits Vin on the bathroom counter and gently strips her down so she can treat her abdominal burns and tilts her head up so Daisy can dab at her head wound and carefully binds her ankle

- (Lavinia makes a joke like "Daisy you perv" and Daisy's like "Lavinia. I have had sex with you at least 7 times and at least 5 of those we didn't have clothes on. Please raise your arms so I can put cream on your burns")

- it's very intimate, and they're both acutely aware of this, but Lavinia is in too much pain and Daisy is too worried about her for them to do anything about it

- Daisy puts Vin in her room and goes to leave her but Lavinia starts sobbing because she's in pain and worried about her brothers and she sees dead people everyday in her job and she misses when they were 12 and the most stressful thing was making sure they didn't wake up matron when having a midnight feast

- Daisy is like 'uhhh' and starts stroking her hair like a cat

- Lavinia starts choking out "f-fuck *sob* o-off" but Daisy stays and they both eventually fall asleep

- the next morning Daisy wakes up to Lavinia attempting to sneak it out

- it obviously goes badly because she's got a broken ankle that's swelled to the size of a balloon and badly concussed

- she's about 3 minutes away from vomiting on the floor but she's determined to get out the front door

- Daisy grabs her

- "Where do you think you're going?"

"Out. Away. Anywhere but here"

"Well. Don't."

"You're not in charge of me, Wells"

"Are you even in charge of you right now? You look as if you're about to pass out"

- Lavinia does privately agree with Daisy, as she can currently see two of her but she's stubborn as fuck so she continues to move towards the front door

- Too fast. She passes out into Daisy's arms

- she ends up back in Daisy's bed and lives with Daisy and Hazel for about a week and they get used to each other

- Lavinia realises that it was nice and when she's around Daisy, she feels safe. Her constant knot of anxiety in her chest undoes itself completely when Daisy looks at her

- and when Lavinia slaps a hand on her shoulder, or presses a kiss to her knuckles Daisy feels every bone in her body buzz excitedly

- Lavinia goes back to her flat, and life sort of resumes a bit

- but Daisy is sick of it. The fear, the uncertainty, the shame, and so bursts into Lavinia's flat

- "Detective Temple, I've, well, I've got something to say to you. Having analysed all the facts, I've come to the conclusion that I'm in love with you, and you're... in love with me. Or that I'm having some sort of ghastly allergic reaction to you. Possibly"

- Daisy is standing her ground but is wide eyed and shaking

- Lavinia stands up from her kitchen table

- "Do shut up, Wells" and Lavinia gives her a big open mouthed kiss

- Beanie and George who had been having breakfast with Vin and watching all of this unfold are all 👀👀👀

- and that's sort of that really

- also just because I feel the need to clarify everything Lavinia also feels her knot of anxiety unravel when with George, and Daisy, while Hazel doesn't ignite feelings of excitement in her bones, she does cause Daisy to feel completely at peace and content in her mind

[williamsockner]

Urban Fantasy Bingo

1. Main character dates a serial killer but the show thinks he’s just a complicated bad boy 2. Codependent siblings 3. Rampant unintended homosexual tension 4. Incest 5. Creepy dolls 6. Exploitative shots of dead teenage girl’s corpse 7. Narrative unsympathetic when bitchy teenage girls gets murdered 8. Parent or significant other in law enforcement 9. Shady big pharma 10. Ugly and/or disabled girl with no personality flaws 11. Amnesia 12. Black best friend (bonus points if gay) 13. Love interest with no personality besides fucking and sports 14. Love interest with no personality besides being embroiled in supernatural bullshit 15. Someone dies during sex 16. Main character commits rape but narrative refuses to acknowledge it as anything but angsty manpain behavior 17. Randomly excellent episode in an otherwise lackluster show 18. Writer’s room fetishist on display 19. Bodyswap/bodysnatch/shapeshift/possession 20. Everyone cares about the blood feud 21. Hundred-year-old urban legends or local history shockingly relevant to small town youths 22. Narrative clumsily attempts to make serial killer sympathetic 23. “the ugly one” played by a hollywood ten 24. Mortal threat to a character’s life during a sports game 25. Murder at prom 26. Super special chosen one and/or ancient prophecy 27. Writers convinced that remorse is the same as redemption 28. Love triangle 29. Snarky put-downs towards clear sources of inspiration 30. Love interests swap because the bad boy character was too interesting to the audience 31. Musical episode 32. Fictional classic monster actually existed in-universe 33. Character witnesses an alternate timeline where they didn’t exist and/or died 34. Character comes back as a ghost but gets no speaking lines so the show could save on the acting fee 35. Evil twin 36. Reincarnated true love 37. Super sexy high femme who’s actually 200 years old 38. Manic monster dream girl 39. Weird hybrids 40. Masquerade ball 41. Characters in class receive a lecture on a topic relevant to the episode 42. Flashback episode 43. Villain has a weird kink 44. Illegitimate lovechild 45. Abusive parent has a favorite child 46. Someone cuts their palm for a blood sacrifice 47. Someone sacrifices a pet for an evil ritual 48. Black witches have more power 49. Scene at the morgue 50. Teenage alcoholism 51. Regular alcoholism 52. Visible manifestations of someone’s guilt and/or plot exposition in the form of dead loved ones 53. Dead perfect significant other 54. Characters get caught doing something and give transparently fake names of celebrities or pop culture references 55. Musical sequence that exists only to show that an actor can dance, sing or play an instrument 56. CPR brings someone back to life and doesn’t break any ribs 57. Character discovers secret power at last second before they almost die 58. Secret society has a ritual to decide who is the head honcho monster 59. Incongruous musical choice 60. Someone has a dark side/evil blood/a prophecy that they’ll go evil 61. Someone turns into a violent sociopath because they lose their soul and/or humanity 62. Somebody bleeds out the eyes or mouth, or has a nosebleed that someone else has to call attention to 63. Significant other hunts what you are 64. Halloween episode 65. “You tried to kill me and that takes grit, I’m proud of you” 66. “There’s nothing on the other side when you die” especially if we know ghosts exist 67. Inconsistent ghost rules 68. The enemy of my bigger enemy 69. Head in a box 70. Cold opening of teenagers getting eaten because of a dare, bonus points for haunted house 71. Racist one-off criminal encounter 72. “Cool costume, bro” to an actual monster 73. Halloween costumes significant to role character plays in the story 74. Wise mentor figure with colorful past and parental affection towards protagonist 75. The one normal guy who keeps getting pulled into bullshit 76. Everybody in the cast dates each other as the writer’s room tries to figure out what the fans want 77. Immortal character put in a box 78. Non-human has to pass as human…badly 79. Ancient character has to adjust to modern day 80. Random regular human with an axe to grind 81. Bait and switch big bad at the end of the story, turns out to actually be a main cast member having a meltdown after taking out villain 82. Head of the secret council actually an evil puppet master 83. Police scanner 84. Debilititis 85. People randomly discovering superpowers around puberty 86. Character that main character hates for no good reason turns out to be evil all along 87. Plot-relevant celestial event 88. Someone telekinetically forces people to turn their guns on each other or themselves 89. Badly-pronounced French 90. The apocalypse originates in this small podunk-ass town 91. Unreasonable hometown pride 92. Latin as the mother tongue of magic 93. Local police covering up for high monster murder rate 94. Single parent is overworked medical practitioner 95. Guardian is not yet ready for this level of responsibility 96. Someone turned out to have a child they didn’t know about 97. Weird pregnancy (bonus if no sex actually happened) 98. Someone’s kid gets aged up to skip working with a child actor 99. Somebody sends their child “away” to keep them from getting embroiled in the bullshit and then they get embroiled in the bullshit anyway 100. Descendants of an immortal 101. Resurrection with no consequences 102. Resurrection or healing with consequences will haunt the protagonist 103. Protagonist has at least one dead parent 104. A friend of the main cast dies in the pilot 105. Candlelight vigil for a high school student 106. Fucked up mother-son dynamics 107. Daddy issues 108. “Fear makes the meat taste better” and/or “I like to watch them scream” 109. Souls get sold and/or girls get married to Satan 110. Deal with the devil turns you into a ticking time bomb 111. “you worded your wish wrong” 112. Alternate reality without magic 113. Real-world religions or spiritual practices treated as monsters of the week 114. All myths contain a grain of truth 115. Someone attacks a wedding 116. Mundane who really wants to be a monster 117. Redhead 118. Feral child raised by wolves 119. Bitchy cheerleader 120. Characters go undercover at a school 121. Mental institution episode 122. Protagonist framed for murder 123. Cold open of dog-walker getting eaten while dog runs away 124. Show starts off with missing or murdered girl 125. Animal motif or animal companion 126. Non-human but non-animal sidekick 127. “The council sent me to give you exposition” 128. Secret society of hunters 129. The Corporation 130. Death by bees 131. Jumpscare 132. Douchebro thinks he’s getting seduced but is actually about to get eaten 133. Siblings have pronounced disagreements over how to feel about their absentee parent 134. Deep South 135. Magic can solve everything except cancer 136. Beautiful sprawling mansion 137. Musical sequence intercutting one couple having sex and someone else dying or doing something else dramatic 138. Safehouse and/or bunker 139. “s/he was just trying to protect you” used as a justification for abjectly abusive parenting 140. Family with oodles of generational wealth 141. Groundhog Day Episode 142. Random skull in dark place 143. Someone punches a mirror 144. Black blood 145. Weird eye color signifies supernatural status 146. Wicker Man episode 147. Pagan gods 148. Faith healer 149. Couple going on a date gets eaten 150. Someone gets murdered in a church 151. Villain boasts that “maybe that works on wimpy monsters, but not me” 152. Chasing the murderer through a house of mirrors 153. Diner 154. Episode titles named after songs or famous books 155. Supernatural war 156. Getting out of a Faustian bargain 157. Someone wakes up tied to a chair at an insane dinner party full of corpses

[gretahayes]

My hot take/unpopular opinion: when people write weird drama between the Superfam in their fics, they’re confusing them with other hero families. Clark and Kon beefing? Wally and Bart. Kara and Kon beefing? Jason and Tim/Tim and Damian.

That said, the Superfam does have their own problems they need to work through, but it’s never what people write about.

I think they should have beef but only in the way I see it (the correct way.) Kara and Kon didn't always get along but now they've got this gay bitchy mlm/wlw solidarity cousin thing going on and really like each other. Fully believe Kara should have no real issue with Clark but Kon SHOULD take digs at him/have a bit of tension with him cause of their rocky history. And I don't think the three of them as a group should ever be close-close. Kara and Clark get along great but add Kon to the mix and he wants them firmly out of his space and business unless it's agreed and authorized and also temporary. But they do get along and on a regular, good day they get along really well.

[obscurecharactershowdown]

Group D Round 1

[image ID: the first image is of Matatagi Hayato, a boy with spiky black hair, tan skin, and black and gray eyes. the second image is of Phon, a Thai man with short bleached hair, wearing a yellow shirt. he also has an ear piercing. end ID]

Matatagi Hayato

he is. just a fucked up little guy, your honor. he is a two-faced bitch and i love him for it. he's so much of an edgelord and just all-around fucked up lil guy that he literally wins a soccer match w his team against literal aliens because those aliens could see people's minds and his was SO fucked up and twisted that it messed up the aliens' strategy- also he has two younger brothers who he deliberately teaches that lying and stealing is 10000% ok u just have to make sure you don't get caught jio;gejaos even tho his personality to other ppl is trash and he personally believes other ppl are inherently untrustworthy he Does rlly care abt his brothers and he basically raises them by himself because they live in poverty and he agreed to join his silly little soccer team because he was promised money so he could take care of his family and that's respectable but he is TOTALLY a fucked up little jerk who is mean to everyone gjeio;gas idk i just want to examine him under a microscope, i care abt him lovingly referred to as Specimen Number 01 he's just weird. he's a weirdo. have u ever seen him without his stupid blue hair streak? now THAT's weird. OH and fun fact abt his blue hair streak. it magically appeared in the middle of a soccer match after he revealed his two-faced bitchy nature to everyone. yeah, he has edgelord disease. i'm afraid it's terminal. he's just a lil virus. nasty lil guy. he's easy to bully. i want to keep him in a jar. also he's my son. hope this makes sense. thanks.

Phon

Listen, he may be the right hand man of a mafia boss, but he wants out so he can live a nice quiet life with his trans girlfriend that he loves very much. Was willing to do whatever it took to make sure she had enough money for gender reassignment surgery. Just really loved his girlfriend. Had to go and get himself killed in the first episode though, sparking a revenge quest lead by his best friend (who he definitely had some romantic tension with) and his girlfriend. He deserved better. All three of them deserved better. They're also a really interesting parallel to the main trouple (who were responsible for killing him, but in their defense it wasn't on purpose).

[sashkapi]

What are your OTPs from other shows besides kindall? (especially love/hate ones)

(Forgive me im so slow)

Oh my here u go >:D

Love/hate ones:

Jimmy and Cindy (The adventures of Jimmy Neutron: boy genius)

This one kinda started it all. Their rivalry was funny and I kinda felt bad for Cindy because she is genuinely smart but what is it if your opponent is a genius  Also hey, blonde and bitchy, my type :) Won't say a lot about this one tho because with all my love for them - there's nothing much I can tell you if you watched the show

Manny and Zoe (El tigre: the adventures of Manny Rivera)

Ok, this one is weird because as a kid I just loved Zoe so much (Her Black Cuervo design, like c'mON LOOK SHES PURPLE) but also liked Manny and Frida together Idk, fandom skewed me later to Manny and Frida but hey, hero-boy/villain-girl dynamic is fun too and I still remember fondly how Manny was immediately smitten by her in "Enter the Cuervo" (Apparently Zoe would end up with Django and honestly? That pair is pure aesthetic, good for them good for them) (Also I'm so mad that I watched this show dubbed because I didn't know english at the time like THEY TOOK ALL CHARM. NO ACCENT, NO SPANISH WORDS IN CHARACTERS SPEECH AND SOME NAMES WERE TRANSLATED IN THE LAMEST WAY POSSIBLE)

Helga and Arnold (Hey Arnold) (can you tell I am a nickelodeon kid yet?)

Ok, this one is more of the one sided love/hate on Helga's side but if you watched the show then you know that she went all in with both love and hate.  Seriously, Helga is such an interesting character. She is amazing and I love her (another bitchy blonde to love yay) Can't say much from Arnold's side. He was oblivious to her crush for the most of the show. He is a kind and understanding boy so jgkkdjgkh I just really wanted Helga to be happy 🥺

Anya and Damian (Spy x Family)

New one and also kinda one sided on Damian's side  Listen These two?

Just plain funny

Anya punching him in the face and Damian falling for her for that? Hilarious Anya being oblivious to his crush despite being an esper because Damian is in denial? Amazing. Good stuff.  They are just so cute and funny, look at them!!!

Catra and Adora (She-ra and the princesses of power)

Ok, I wouldn't consider myself a catradora shipper anymore but God, their dynamic in the first seasons is everything. Like darn, they had drama. Actual enemies to lovers and THE TENSION

Aaaaand season 5 destroyed it all. (Spoilers for she ra ahead)

Some people dropped the ship after season 4 finale because Catra would rather destroy the world than let Adora win, but for me it was THE THING I LOVED LIKE YES, MORE DRAMA, MORE CONFLICT, NOW CATRA MUST TRY REAL HARD TO GET ON ADORAS GOOD SIDE AND THAT MEANS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, I WONDER HOW IT WILL GO and they just??? Kinda forgive her??? I'm sorry, yes, Catra purring on Adora's lap? Sweet. The kiss was also dramatic. But it all felt so undeserved I guess it's because of the limited time the writers had. But damn, introducing a bigger threat in Hordak Prime and kinda handwaving her crimes isn't a redemption for Catra.  But again. First seasons? Good ass dynamic. 10/10

Knuckles and Rouge (Sonic the hedgehog franchise)

THIS ONE IS  AH NICE If you followed my kbsd art then you probably know that I also love Sonic (lil guy doing cool stuff - my weakness) Wouldn't call knuxouge love/hate ship at this point that much tho. They started as this but now they are more of a flirts-a-lot/flusters-a-lot type of pair. Also, we don't talk about "dumb" arc SEGA was putting Knux in 2010's Anyway funni echidna and funni bat my beloveds

Non love/hate

Sanford and Deimos (Madness Combat)

Ok, so the series is about violence, fighting, and bloodshed, right? And then I saw these two in 0.5 episodes and my brain went "OK, but what if they kiss?" And I spend 2021 rotating these two in my head. Violently. (The way Deimos doesn't attack Sanford in "dedmos adventure" still makes me sad from time to time)

Dr. Fox and Hawkodile (Unikitty!)

I was in a weird place of mind when I was obsessed with this show. Looking back at it - its really silly.  I'm gonna be honest, the biggest reason I loved this ship is because it's a big warrior type of guy having a huge crush on a nerd girl and being really silly about it. After a few episodes with this topic I got kinda tired of it tho. 

Still, they are cute.

I might be forgetting some but honestly, if I was to list every ship I enjoy - we'll be here forever This also kinda made me realize that I haven't seen any proper love\hate pairs in recent media. Might be just me tho.