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kianamaiart · 2 months ago

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IDWTBAMG CHARACTER FUN FACTS

Well, some fun facts and mostly lore or character relationship stuff. Under the cut!

AIKA

Aika became the next Star Guardian at age 13. She’s 15 now

Aika’s want to help people and relentless positivity were part of the reason she was chosen to be the Star Guardian: Guardian of the Stars in the first place. While her love for the job has fizzled out, this aspect of her character still a core part of her.

She’s very kind and gentle person but that kinda goes out the window when magical duties are brought into the equation

Her and Hoshi care about one another but their relationship is currently a bit tense. They’re usually pretty quick to make jabs at one another

She struggled to get used to the platform shoes in her magical girl outfit

She LOVES food. And her eyes are usually way too big for her stomach leading to many a food coma

Aika and her teammates worked in secret for the most part, not really being allowed to “exist in the real world”. Because of this, with the free time she had, Aika would read a lot (she’s actually very book smart)

Aika loves extreme sports and is an adrenaline junky. However, rollercoasters freak her out for some reason

Aika drags Zira into lots of new eperiences. Zira usually ends up appreciating the experiences after the fact

Aika’s a morning person

ZIRA

Zira is smart but doesn’t apply herself in school

They have a lot of artistic interests, particularly art, music and fashion

She likes the idea of writing fanfiction in theory but writing’s sooooo much work. Any ideas she has just kinda live in her head, causing her to zone out and daydream a ton

While shy for the most part, Zira can be very blunt and isn’t necessarily a pushover

Prior to Aika, she didn’t have a lot (any) friends at school but she’s mostly content doing her own thing

They’d hang out in Miss’ classroom a lot, either to show her Moon Sailor stuff against her will or just to have lunch

Zira loves playing video games and especially loves visual novels

Zira develops a crush on Aika pretty quickly. Aika’s kindness, authenticity and bravery is inspiring to Zira. Also Aika’s the only other person her age to really give her the time of day. And also she thinks Aika’s pretty

She thinks Hoshi’s really cool and since Aika doesn’t particularly enjoy talking about her job, Zira usually goes to Hoshi for magical girl questions. Initially Hoshi doesn’t trust Zira with that information but is really flattered to have someone who looks up to them and is interested in everything they have to say. So they indulge when appropriate.

Zira’s a night owl

HOSHI

Hoshi saved Aika when she was really young and has kept her safe ever since

Hoshi and Aika started off kind of like siblings but Hoshi then became her boss, making their relationship a bit strained and more complicated

Their role as a magical mascot managerial in nature. They make Aika and her team do their jobs, follow protocol, teach them how to use their powers, keep up morale, do timecards, etc.

While Hoshi oversees this team, their responsibility is primarily to the Star Guardian

Hoshi, much like Aika, used to be really chipper and a bit more goofy but Aika’s kinda worn them down overtime

Hoshi’s not a fan of Earth, but in an effort to better understand Aika’s feelings, tries out being a human and doing Earth activities

Hoshi takes a while to get used to their human form. They’re really clumsy in it

They have a hard time making hands for their human form. Their hands are slightly different every time but equally terrifying. They eventually get better at making them though.

Hoshi doesn't use their human form too much. Most people just assume their Aika's weird pet bird

Hoshi doesn't need to eat but discovers they enjoy the act of eating

ECLIPSE

Eclipse is one of the few humans that know that Aika and the other magical girls exist

He met Aika pretty early on in her magical girl career and he was immediately enamored with her

Since finding about magical girls, he’s obsessively tried keeping track of them, leading him to start acting out in order to get their attention. They only really care because he knows their secret and they play along

He and Devoid made his current outfit together. DeVoid wanted to make it black but Eclipse was set on making it very bright and showy

Eclipse currently resides with DeVoid. He gets on her nerves sometimes but they both do care about each other

Eclipse is a pretty good cook

Eclipse isn’t particularly hateful but he’s really got beef with Zira for some reason

It’s hard to tell if Eclipse is really in love with Aika or if he just loves the concept of their nonexistent relationship

Eclipse has a lovely singing voice

His real name is Elio

LADY DeVOID

DeVoid was banished to space by a Star Guardian. For a LONG time she lived (unconsciously) as a sort of celestial being that would spit out monsters that the Star Guardians for many generations would have to face. While not ideal it was better than fighting DeVoid before she got to full power.

DeVoid finally wakes up in the present timeline, with no memories other than being banished by a Star Guardian and wanting revenge and knowing that she’s supposed to be able to create monsters. Unfortunately for her, she doesn’t remember how to use her powers. She doesn’t even remember her name, so she came up with “Lady DeVoid”

DeVoid loves human reality TV. Specifically competition shows. She loves how petty and evil people become

Reality TV is where most of her knowledge of humans comes from

Though DeVoid is pretty stoic, her ears are very expressive

DeVoid taught Eclipse how to do his makeup

She really likes Eclipse’s cooking

When she’s out and about she’s usually wearing sunglasses because it’s simply too bright for her

DeVoid does have to work a normal job in the human world and simply goes by “Dee”

People rarely question her appearance (because that’s just rude). But when people do ask what’s up with her horns she just says “it’s a condition” and that’s usually enough for people to just end the convo there.

MISS

Miss loves her job more than anything. She’s a very accomplished teacher and takes a lot of time to make sure all of her students succeed

Miss cares about Zira a lot. Always staying in her classroom just in case Zira wants to stop by for lunch, giving her advice or giving her extra tutoring as needed

Because of Zira, Miss has become a closet Moon Sailor fan

Though Aika’s just started attending school, she and Miss have bonded quite a bit. Aika’s positive disposition and cheeriness bring Miss a lot of joy

Miss keeps her personal life (not that she really has one) out of work but finds herself opening up a little more than she’d like to Aika and Zira

Miss used to get really antsy during summer breaks, leading her to start teaching summer school to fill the time

Her workaholic nature was the reason for her and her ex-wife’s divorce

Miss has gone on one date since her divorce. The idea of having starting over is exhausting to her so she’s mostly okay just being single

Miss doesn’t really like coffee but she drinks a lot of it out of necessity

Miss has a ton of tattoos

#i don't want to be a magical girl #idwtbamg

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lavenders388 · 3 months ago

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HII!!

could we please get some kang dae ho x reader??

something where he’s a bit of his usual himbo self and the reader is maybe a bit airheaded— something about two people being in love with one another while the world around them is burning is amazing.

~Flowers in December~

<3 Kang Dae Ho x Reader

requested 💌

authors note: i am amazed by the amount of requests and also so flattered!! I am so happy to get back into writing not only for myself but to be able to make other people happy to see their ideas come to life!! i apologize if this has some flaws i cant wait to get more practice in and promise the next will be better!! feedback is always appreciated! thank you all so much!!<3 -matcha

~~~~~~~~~~~⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆~~~~~~~~~~~

...

~takes place during the second night~

"we should all take turns keeping watch over the group" player 456 urged as the warning for lights out echoed throughout the room, the rest of the group silently agreeing- trusting the man who claimed to have been in one of the previous games, leaving as the sole survivor. you were, as were many others, reluctant to believe that he had done all of this before, but after his help in the first game and joining his team for the second, you grew to trust him; and the other members of your group. the man that had been assigned your partner for keeping watch was coincidentally a member you were drawn to specifically- at first because he was close to your age, his boyish face making you feel a little less scared and alone in the second game, and eventually you appreciated his outward personality and kindhearted confidence, a stark contrast to the situation you both were in. as you sat together, although trying to protect your group from whatever could happen in the dark room, you felt even safer. "how in the world did you pull that off?" you broke the silence with a whisper, referring to him playing gonggi in the previous game. "my hands were shaking so badly i could barely even hold my ddakji." he laughs, a bit louder than he should have given the people sleeping, but it made you smile. "i told you all i played with my sisters!" he chuckles. "you said you know how to do it yeah," you retorted, stifling a giggle at him being unaware of the compliment. "you didn't tell us you were amazing at it, that was a surprise." he turns away, embarrassed of how deeply your compliment made him grin and scared you'd see him blushing even in the dark. "thank you y/n." he says bashfully as he regains his composure. the silence returns; the reality of where you're both having this conversation threatening to creep back in. his gaze softens as he turns to you again, "you did really well with your ddakji you know, doing it the first try is really impressive, especially given the circumstances." you smile, a toothy grin as not only are you proud of yourself but you appreciate the compliment; especially from him. the kind, authentic way he states how good you did has you unable to find a response. "t-thank you" you say, blushing and still smiling. "it helped that nobody was there, i get nervous when people are watching me." his demeanor changes. he nervously runs his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry if i made you nervous, y/n" he says sincerely. your confusion shows on your face until you realize what he means. "oh no don't worry! i meant the crowd, like how everybody was cheering for the other teams! i didn't want them all to see if i messed up. you watching me helped actually. it made me less nervous." the silence returns; comfortingly. you've forgotten where you are, you've forgotten what would have happened if you'd messed up, all that's on your mind is the man sitting next to you. when you look back he's staring at you. smiling. "thank you for being on my team." you say to him as he turns away, trying to hide how long he was looking at you. you've never seen him speechless before. "if we work together nothing can stand in our way." he said to you just as he said to jung bae before the game. "i am truly honored you feel that way." you half-joke. "what are your plans for tomorrow?" you ask as if youre speaking to him in a normal situation. "oh wait im sorry!" you laugh. "well i bet they're the same as mine then!" you joke about your forgetfulness as well as making light of where you find yourself. like hes done for you, he also had forgotten the events of the day and what followed tomorrow. the two of you talking made him feel as though he was living a good, normal day. it was greatly appreciated by him, your bubbly nature being a moment of solace.

a/n if this is buns at all please lmk what i can do better!!! ⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

#squid game x reader #dae ho #dae ho x reader #player 388 x reader #kang dae ho x reader #kang dae ho #squid game #squid game season 2

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chlorinecake · 6 months ago

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☆ ☆ ☆ You’re All Skin n’ Bones, Baby

— ⊹ ⛓️ 𝗣𝗔𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 ♯ Trouble Maker!N.RK x Good Girl!Reader 🍴

⛓️ 𝗣𝗟𝗢𝗧 ♯ When your father, a.k.a the dean of your university, sets you on a quest to help the troubled transfer student from your art class rewrite the rebellious narrative staining his character, you two find yourselves falling for each other, discovering a new art of taking chances, making mistakes, and getting messy...

⛓️ 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗜𝗡𝗦 ♯ Swearing, Awkward Situations, Riki Vandalizes Your University with Graffiti, Name-Calling (Flirting), Kissing (With Tongue), Hickeys (Kinda), Riki Has A Tattoo, Lingering Touches (Nothing Below The Belt), Suggestive Jokes, Reckless Behavior, Some Fluff and Angst if You Squint

⛓️ 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗗 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗧 ♯ 4.2k ──── 「生きがい」

Friday, The Dean's Office, 3:32 p.m.

“Simply put, Riki is a very misunderstood youth, and you, _____, so happen to be one of the few people who sincerely understand him.”

You stared back at your father, who sat in his leather chair at his desk, a dumbfounded expression upon your face as you crossed your arms. “And you're telling me all of this because of what again?”

“Because I need your��help,” Riki butted in from where he sat beside where you stood on your feet, drawing your attention back to his casual disposition.

From the way his long legs extended lazily before him to the way his black combat boots hit the ground with loud thumps every time his foot bounced out of boredom, the poor kid was just as big as his behavioral problems...

That is, roughly 187 centimeters worth...

However, in spite of his large stature and occasional bouts of clumsiness, Riki Nishimura was lighter than a feather on his feet when it came to dancing, a.k.a., one of the few things in his life that he found joy in, aside from you, his family, and the comfort of his bed...

Looking back at your father, he gave you a pleading look, hoping that he would somehow soften your heart without the use of any more words.

And it’s not that you didn't want to help Riki...

I mean, he was one of your closest friends, and you otherwise would've leaped at any opportunity to spend more time with him, so long as it wasn't under such circumstances.

In the past, your father never really approved of your friendship with Riki, simply because he had a track record of rebellion according to the other universities he attended and ended up getting kicked out of.

'A homeschooled delinquent,' some would call him, but you preferred sweeter names for him—names that described the real him.

It's just that the whole idea of having you, the “perfect student,” coach a more troubled peer seemed like a poor excuse of a publicity stunt.

Riki was much more to you than that... he deserved better than to be scrutinized like some sort of criminal just for being his authentic self.

And the odd reality was that you and the other kids at your university with allegedly clean records were no different from Riki.

All misguided and all a little reckless here and there...

Taking risks was part of being young, last time you checked.

The only difference is that Riki wasn't as good at hiding those parts of him like the rest of the students at your university were...

They were either forced or pressured to hide behind a mask that resembled good grades, perfect attendance... stuck within a cookie-cutter framework, and exhibiting perpetual compliance to the ways of the academic world—

“Fine,” you sighed, straightening your posture to appear more obliging than you were actually feeling, “but only if you promise not to make this some sort of project, Dad... Riki's my friend, not some charity case to make you look good.”

Your father scoffed at your insulting words. “What do you take me as, some kind of crook? Such a thought never even crossed my mind, _____,” he corrected sternly before continuing, “My concerns for Riki come from a good place and have nothing to do with what I can gain from you agreeing to help us-”

“Fix him, right?” You interrupt, making a shy smirk tug at the corners of Riki's mouth at the awkward tension in the room now.

“Honey, you know that's not what this is about,” your father sighs, getting up from his seat and straightening out his suit. “Riki is not a broken lamp that he should be fixed... but a lost soul in need of positive redirecting.”

“And who better to help than a fellow peer?” Riki winks at you, making you roll your eyes at him.

“Precisely,” the dean finishes, pushing his chair under the desk before making his way to the office door. “I expect you two to run into hurdles on this journey, but hopefully it's a process that helps you both grow... together...”

You shake your head, uncrossing your arms from over your chest as your father’s eyes flicker between you and Riki now.

“Oh, and one more thing, ____... this young man may be troubled to some degree, but he can certainly teach you a lesson or two on respect.”

Slam.

The office door closed slowly, but with its habitually loud locking sound, making your insides shake a bit.

You look back at Riki, who only had a shrug to offer you, though you knew your father was expecting you and Riki to see yourselves out of his office.

So y’all did, all the way to your separate homes, where you would dread the following Monday when Project: “Positively Redirect” Riki would commence!...

⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆

Next Monday, ART Room 8080, 5:30 p.m.

The bottom of your ass was stinging given how long you had been sitting in the uncomfortable desk chair.

Your back had also started to burn with a similar pain, and the only thing that seemed to delight you amidst the lengthy "Elements of Art" lecture was once again the tall boy sitting beside you.

The voice of your instructor faded away in your ears as you observed Riki holding an ink pen, gliding its ball-tip against his skin in careful lines.

“You suck at drawing,” you whisper to him.

“And your mother’s a cow,” he retorts plainly, despite the smirk curling at his mouth.

From what you can tell, he was drawing a spiderweb in the shape of a heart on the inside of his wrist; The same romantic spiderweb design that was graffitied on your university's parking lot pavement a few days ago.

You always found it endearing how Riki's right wrist would be full of inky doodles by the end of each lecture, thanks to him being left-handed.

Though, other people found his habit to be odd… immature, even... and you never understood why those people even felt the need to speak—

“You’re really making an effort at this character development thing, aren’t you, babes?” You ask sarcastically, tilting your head at him now.

“Yup,” he answers matter-of-factly, eyes still trained on the inky design staining his pale skin.

You took in the expression on his face—the way his lips often poked out slightly like a duck whenever he focused on something.

It was a sight that always made you giggle inside… mostly because you found cute things to be humorous, but also because Riki had a way of making you feel all giddy for reasons you didn't fully understand—

“Wanna kiss ‘em or something?” He asked, looking you dead in the eye with his own piercing ones.

��E-excuse me?” You scoffed with both confusion and feigned disgust.

“I mean these,” he said, showing you the doodle of a skull on his wrist that had big, red lips to match the crimson bows at each pigtail. “Heard you like it juicy,” he continued, raising his eyebrows at you flirtatiously.

“Shut the fuck up,” you swear, shoving his shoulder slightly.

And with that, the class was concluded, and students were loading up their textbooks into their backpacks in every which direction—

“You’re really not that different from me, y’know that?” He said in a mocking tone, “Especially not with that raging potty mouth of yours...”

“I was provoked to use such language, you dick.”

“Then you have very poor emotional regulation skills for your age.”

...

“I’m leaving,” you say, getting up from the seat and slinging your bag over your shoulder, “have fun making out with your new dOodLe sKuLl giRLfriEnD... Heard you like ‘em skinny, anyways…”

“Pfft... Where’d you hear that crap?”

“Around,” you lied, knowing that Riki wasn't the type of guy to have weight preferences when it came to girls...

He only had personality preferences, and so far, you were his absolute favorite person yet, crumby attitude and all.

“Whatever,” he said, in between your brief voyage to the campus lockers where you put your things away. “Also,” Riki began again, leaning against his locker while looking at his reflection in the mirror, “should I... change?”

“What, your diaper?”

“No, my outfit, stupid. Unless you don’t mind being seen with a guy who looks like me these days...”

His words sting you for some reason, and you know exactly what he was trying to imply with that comment.

The other day, Riki heard your father complaining to an instructor in his office about student's not 'abiding by standards of clothing apparel,' and of course, the poor boy assumed the comment was specifically directed towards him-

“You look fineee, Riki,” you reassure him, closing your locker before caressing the side of his arm gently. “Besides, I'd never feel ashamed walking beside you... ripped jeans, piercings, and all...”

His mind paused for a second, focusing a little too hard on the way your touch somehow warmed him from both the outside and within.

“Hey,” you started, your voice pulling him back from his thoughts, “Earth to Riki...?”

“Y-yea, right... Earth,” he stammered, running a shy hand through his hair before adjusting his backpack over his shoulder.

“Let's get out of here, then,” you chuckled, walking down the hall now as he followed closely behind you.

⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆

Later, On Some Unknown, Majestic Path, 6:17 p.m.

You two made it to a bridge—the crossing road where you and him expected to straighten out the crooked mess of rumors and past infamies plaguing Riki’s reputation.

“You got the letter, right?”

The letter, he heard your words replay in his mind...

The very letter in which Riki divulged a sincere handwritten apology to the Dean of your university discussing his declining academic performance, poor behavior, aptitudes to improve, and blah fucking blah...

Anyone with a good head on their shoulders could tell that Riki was a fantastic artist, but every rose had its thorn, with Riki's impulsive creative side often getting the best of him...

Aside from going against the dress code and skipping classes, Riki recently vandalized school property with a spontaneous mural of skulls, spiderwebs, and other edgy doodles on the parking lot pavement.

Nobody knew he was responsible for it aside from you, and you had no intention of ratting him out for it...

Yes, it was an unusual design to see every morning at the center of such a prestigious university, but regardless of all that, you figured the graffiti looked pretty cool, actually...

Besides, it was an art school for crying out loud; weren't students supposed to express themselves here?

Or perhaps you only felt that way because Riki was responsible for it, but I digress.

“Yeah, I double checked before we left,” he said plainly, looking down the brick road ahead. “Oh, and uh... I know I've never showed you, but my place is actually the small one right over there… with the candle-like furnace on top... you see it?”

“Yeah, I see it,” you smile softly, just as you catch on to him walking ahead of you and down the right path instead of the left one.

“Hey, the dean's office is this way, remember?”

“Uh huh... and it’s still gonna be there when we get back.”

“Bro, where’re you going?”

“Bro, nowhere,” he replied mockingly, still walking away from you, “I just need to clear my head before sending this stupid letter… just in case I run into the dean or something...”

“And would that really be so bad?” You pressed, “I swear, it’s like everyone views my dad like a scary monster just because he’s doing his job...”

Riki felt himself internally gag at the reminder that you were in fact the deans daughter.

“Since when do you, of all people, defend your dad?”

“Hey, I may be a disrespectful fart towards him at times, but that doesn't mean I can't stand up for him.”

“Uh huh,” Riki nods skeptically, “he must be giving you extra brownie points and allowance for that shit or something...”

“Yeah, actually, he is! And I don't plan on sharing any with you, either... not my brownies points NOR my petty cash...”

“Good,” he retorts playfully, mirroring your bratty behavior, “my piggy bank likes being empty, anyways... PLUS, I’m trying to cut back on sugar these days...”

“Well, good luck with that then... citrus helps, though… with the sugar cravings, I mean.”

“I know... that’s why I’m hanging out with you... duhhh!”

“Oh, so you’re implying that I'm sour, now?”

“If the shoe fits,” he shrugs, and a few moments pass before you’re walking through a front door, through his living room, and eventually onto a balcony.

The house was so dimly lit that you couldn’t make out much of anything while inside, other than the smell of tea and leather cleaner.

“What d’you think?” Riki asks, spreading his arms out to show off, “Gnarly landscape, am I right?”

“You’re so right,” you agree, walking over to the ledge and observing the large pasture that made up his backyard. “It’s beautiful here.”

The two of you look over the edge for a while, folding your arms over the stone balcony until you catch him looking off to the other side, something about him immediately catching your attention.

“Woah?” You exclaim, finding your hands in his hair as you turn his head, examining the thing that caught your eye.

“Woah what? Is there a bug on me or something?” Riki asks, bending his knees slightly so you can reach him better.

“No, it's a tattoo.” You clarify, “I didn't know you had any real ones...”

“Oh yeahhh… I uh... I got that one a while back when I was in high school... I have another one, too, but it's under my clothes, so I can't show you until we're marri-”

“What's it say?” You ask with a whisper, examining the fine textures of inky Japanese characters staining the ivory skin behind his ear.

The tattoo in itself was relatively simple, but you believe that's what made it all the more stunning...

“Ikigai...” He answers with a deep voice, looking in your eyes with his own piercing ones, which makes you retreat your touch from his hair, “it refers to something that gives us our sense of purpose... our reason to live...”

The silence is so loud after he says that that the sound of distant birds and wind-chimes fills your ears as if you were wearing headphones.

That's when you hear a door hinge creak in the distance—

“Riki?! I don’t have my glasses on, but your bedroom looked oddly tidy and you never tidy your room, so now I’m worried—”

“In a minute, Grams!” Riki called out in a deep voice, resting his hands at his sides as he looked back at you, the elderly woman having stayed outside, keeping to herself.

Despite her few wrinkles, she was a perfect shadow of Riki, from her similarly fierce eyes, the long legs she stood on, to her plump, duck-like lips—

“What’s the deal with your face right now?” Riki asked, drawing your attention back to him.

“Oh, you mean my beauty?” You returned sarcastically.

“No, the other thing,” he corrected, “…made your eyes go all big and bright.”

“Oh… Possibly shock, then?”

“But from what cause?”

“Grams,” you repeated, looking over the balcony at the same shed-door the woman just came from. “I didn’t know you lived with anybody…”

“I don’t; she lives with me,” Riki continued, flicking a mosquito off his arm. “She’s kind of mental, so I gotta take care of her like she took care of me.”

“That’s sweet,” you murmur quietly to yourself, but he hears you anyway-

“What’d you say?”

“Nothing…”

“You definitely said something.”

“No I didn’t?”

“Haven’t I ever told you how terrible you are at lying?”

“No, actually,” you respond plainly, “But you have told me that you think I’m beautiful... well, indirectly, but it still counts.”

He furrows his brows at you. “When did I say that?”

“Literally a few seconds ago?”

“Seriously?”

“Damn… Now I'm starting to think you didn't mean it.”

“No no no, I meant it!” Riki says, raising his voice slightly, “P-probably...”

“Well, thanks anyway,” you return, looking back over the balcony at the sight of his grandmother roaming their garden.

“I think you're beautiful, too, Riki.”

A silence swarmed between you two now.

Not an awkward silence, but a silence nonetheless.

A pleasant peace…

Riki bit his lip to keep himself from smiling, but you had already noticed his expression by now, poking a finger at the apple of his slightly rosy cheek, making him swat your hand away playfully.

“Stop that or I'll bite you,” he threatens.

“But babyyy… you look so cute when you're blushing,” you teased, making the poor boy feel like he was just seconds from internally combusting because of you.

Riki never got worked up over compliments like this, but then again, you proved to have a stronger effect on his emotions… one that even you father could see.

“I seriously will bite you, ____,” he warns again through a contagious chuckles, grabbing a hold of your wrist at the same time your hand gripped his bicep, making him stop in his actions.

You two shyly meet each other's eyes now, faint smiles present on both your faces until you release your grip on his arm, his touch still remaining at your wrist.

“Riki.” You speak quietly, and for reasons you don’t understand at first… but that’s when he decides to speak up instead—

“I wanna show you one more thing,” he starts, still holding your wrist as he steps up with a strong lunge onto the balcony ledge, resting his foot on the wooden plank attached to it.

“Riki, get down from there!” You shout.

“Not until you join me first.” He reasons with a smirk.

Judging from the way he briefly peeks down at the ground beneath him, you can already tell that he wants you to jump with him.

“Riki… I’m not doing that... I-I can't… and I can’t let you do that, either.”

Funny thing is, you said all of this while doing a lunge yourself, joining the tall boy on the balcony ledge and holding his hand tightly as you let your feet find the wobbly plank next.

“Why not?…” He presses.

“Because… you’re all skin and bones, baby,” you sigh nervously, feeling your heart rate increase with every passing second. “I’m afraid that I’ll either hurt you or that you’ll hurt yourself.”

Riki gives you a shady look now. “You have no idea how insulting that is to me, do you?”

“Be careful, asshole!” You shriek, his strength having tugged at your hand, making you tread even further down the plank now.

“Geez, would you relax, drama queen? I’m doing fineee, see? We’re fine… Just don’t let go of my hand until I say so, okay?”

“H-how am I even supposed to trust you in a state like this?” Your voice comes out just as wobbly as you feel in your knees, being sure not to look down as that would only make things worse for you.

“Hmm… not sure,” he shrugs, “But maybe it would help if you stopped policing me for like... one fucking second?”

“Fine. A second has passed, now can we PLEASEE go back to the bridge—ahhh!”

Riki jumps first, but because you were holding hands, you fall with him, tumbling into the grassy pasture before landing on top of him.

“That was fun, right?” Riki asks while scanning your face, wind knocked out of him; he's panting slightly beneath you, chest rising and falling given the rush of adrenaline he just received.

“Are we even alive right now?” You ask back, seriously not being able to believe that you both survived such a fall... everything around you seemed light, and you weren't sure if that had something to do with your head spinning or something worse. “Please tell me this isn’t heaven.”

“Not unless you really think that’s what being on top of me feels like…”

You gave him the deadliest side-eye you could muster—

“Shut the fuck up,” you curse him, making a light chuckle rumble in his chest.

For a brief moment, you look up, just now realizing that Riki’s backpack was scattered among the grass with all of his school supplies decorating the landscape.

Sighing, you planted your palms on the ground before trying to get up, only for the strength of Riki’s arm to keeps you down, fusing your body’s together.

“Riki, the dean's office is gonna be closing soon, we gotta get going-”

“And my future can wait, ____,” he said, looking into your eyes, “just let me enjoy this moment in the present for a little longer, alright?”

You wait to answer before eventually nodding, watching his chest heave slower now, but still in a rising and falling manner.

“You're nervous about something,” you whisper, even though it was more like a question to him.

You felt your stomach flutter at the way his hand was secured at your waist now, trailing up to the side of your face with his other hand.

“I am,” he says plainly, voice deep and vulnerable, “so please, just... don't say anything or else you'll make this worse for me, okay?”

“You're not about to try and kiss me, are you!?” You ask, screwing your eyebrows at him.

“And just like that, you made it worse for me,” Riki sighs, not being brave enough to meet your eyes anymore.

His hands leave your body, falling beside him as if he were about to start making snow angels in the bed of grass.

“You think you deserve a kiss—of all things—after almost getting us killed just a few seconds ago?”

“I meannnn,” he starts, looking back at you now before repositioning his hands behind his head with latticed fingers, “one kiss wouldn't hurt, right?… Maybe even just a few…”

No words are exchanged from this point.

It just becomes a moment of you two looking at each other, your hands roaming up his torso now as you sit up to straddle him, keeping him pinned to the ground with your weight before placing a kiss on his cheek.

“You're a very odd boy, Riki Nishimura,” you say, watching a smile spread across his face as his skin still tingled where you kissed him.

Your hands find his that were tucked beneath his head and put them back around your body like they were before.

“I may be odd, but the least you can do is kiss me normally,” he whispers, taking hold of your face and crashing his lips into yours, eyes fluttering shut at the blissful contact.

And it feels too good to say it's your first time... It feels too right...

You tilt your head to deepen the contact, making him hum beneath you at the sudden way you took control again, feeling his hand gently cradle the nape of your neck.

“Please,” he says breathlessly in between, catching on to the way your body shuddered when his touch went under your shirt, resting at the dip of your waist, “Don't make me stop yet...”

And all you can do is pant in response, feeling your heart rate increase with the passion as his tongue just barely comes into contact with yours, making you melt into the warmth of his lips even more.

But his delicate fingers are cold as they touch you, not necessarily wandering, but inching their way up from your waist to the side of your ribs, only to pull you closer as your bodies meshed into a sprawl of flustered feelings.

“You just can't get close enough to me, can you?” You ask him through a quiet breath, making him chuckle slightly as your catty question.

“Don't rub it in, dweeb,” he replies with a raspy voice, just as a low groan slips past his pretty lips, and you're just now realizing that you were kissing along his jawline, his head thrown back against the grass as your soft lips kept peppering his skin, “I'm actually enjoying what you're doing to me for once...”

And his last sentence comes out so quietly, you otherwise would've missed it if you weren't right by his neck, humming with each kiss you placed against him, making his grip at your waist tighten slightly until you abruptly pulled away, looking back at him with your own fuzzy vision...

Despite that, you could still make out the lovesick expression taking over his gorgeous features, both his heart and mind in a haze as he looked back at you, purity dancing in his eyes.

“W-why'd you stop?” He stammers, almost pouting as a smirk tugs at the corner of your mouth now, your own cheeks being dusted a rosy hue given the blood rushing to your face.

“Because,” you say plainly, crawling off of him now as he lets out an exaggerated sigh, sulking at the missing warmth of you straddling him, “that's all you deserve for the day.”

“And tomorrow?” He presses, eyes half-lidded.

“I'll tell you after we deliver this letter to the dean,” you say, looking up at the window to his house, “and when your grandma isn't watching us...”

“Wait, she's what?”

Riki sits up now, whipping his head almost instantly in the direction of his house to see what you were still blushing about, and it was none other than his grandmother, clapping in the distance at the sight of you and Riki laying beside each other on the grass.

“So that's why you've been tidying up recently; you've met a pretty girl,” she says in an old voice, making him hide his face with his hands while groaning with embarrassment. “Awww, don't be shy; she just had her lips all over you... Oh, and I'm his grandmother, by the way!”

“Nice to meet you,” you say while giggling, watching Riki practically crumble to pieces, knowing that his grandma had just seen everything.

"Well, make sure you two don't stay out too late... it's getting dark,” the woman warned, even though it was still relatively sunny outside.

Must be her vision, you thought to herself.

“Got it, Grams,” Riki sighed, sitting up now with a forced smile as he waved his grandma off, the door creaking behind her as the sound of her television program faded off with the melody of her laughter.

“You good?” You ask, catching on to the way Riki's sight pans off now, a certain thought rising to his mind as he took a few shaky breaths.

“Y-yea, I'm alright,” he answers, not meeting your eyes until he asks, “You didn't bite me, did you?”

His fingers find his neck now, grazing over the light pink spot where you had kissed him, but it was only that color because of your lip balm, not because you bit him.

“I might have nibbled, yes...” You start timidly, trying to hold back a smile at the way his eyes widened now, worried that you might mark him. “Don't blame me though when you started it.”

“No, I didn't, you blood thirsty vampire,” he scoffs with over-exaggerated offense. “There's a mark on me now, isn't there?”

"No, you idiot... Besides, I wouldn't want your grandma to have a hickey as her first impression of me,” you correct, getting up from the ground now to collect his scattered school supplies from around the yard.

Your words lingered in his mind for a bit.

A girl like you leaving a bad first impression? The thought seemed foreign to him, but at the same time, comforting...

He was finally starting to see things the way you saw them. You and him really weren't all that different—just two people from different walks of life, upholding varied reputations, but still and all with kindred spirits.

Spirits for fun and adventure... youth and romance...

“Wasn't even worth it,” you mumbled to yourself, picking up the envelope that was now stained with a bit of dirt given the fall.

“What wasn't worth it?” He repeated, looking over his shoulder to find you on your knees in the grass, hair slightly disheveled from all the action.

“Jumping, first of all... and second, kissing you...”

“Right,” he says while drawing out the syllable, side-eyeing you with his legs crossed, “Because I definitely told you to get on top of me and kiss all over my neck like a human mosquito.”

“Trust me, I regret doing that.” You tease, fake gagging, to which he chuckled at you, “Your lips tasted weird, anyway...”

“Pfft... weird how?”

“Sour,” you poke, making him look down in his lap, smiling at the memory of you two in the hallway earlier.

Eventually, he gets up to help you gather the rest of his textbooks, pencils, notes, and chocolate bars that fell from his backpack, holding it open as you loaded it up and set trail back up the hill you just jumped off of.

“And you're sure this whole letter thing is still a good idea?” He asks, adjusting the strap to his backpack over his shoulder as you two walked beside each other.

You take a second to glance at yourselves, taking in the light of your messy clothes, blushing faces.

"Oh, you’re definitely still sending that.”

“Cool… But should I revise it at all since we have extra time?”

“Maybe tomorrow,” is all you say, taking his hand in yours as y’all walk side by side...

⛓️‍💥 AUTHOR'S NOTE — I've had this fic collecting dust in my drafts since July of this year, but @microwvdstrawb3rri3s reminded me that my blog has been long overdue for a new Niki fic, so I decided to post it finally.... Also, I'm adding a special tag here for @bambangan because I REALLY feel like she‘ll enjoy this fic (considering how Niki's character is pretty similar to how I wrote for him in my Flirty TSA Series a while back 🤭)...

tysm for reading this quick lil fic !! ✗⚬ﾒ𝟶 a/n ℓօⓥe always ⋆⋆⋆ and feel free to check out my masterlist for more !!

𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ( 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 💌 ) @squoxle @nishiimuranights @wonbinisbabygurl @ashgonedash @yourmomscuntis2tighy @watamotee33 @addictedtohobi @microwvdstrawb3rri3s

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temporalhiccup · 4 months ago

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There are many different reasons to play ttrpgs, and sometimes creative catharsis is one of them.

Certainly it's a reason's Bluebeard's Bride is one of my favorite games, or why it's fun for me to play emotionally vulnerable characters in Bite Marks and Apocalypse Keys.

A couple of months ago I started playing DIE with some close friends, and a couple of new players I haven't had a chance to play with much. But it's a group that's played with each other often, and DIE has a really emotionally rich and complex premise we were excited for: "In DIE, you play a group of authentically flawed and desperate real-world people (Personas) who are sucked into a cursed roleplaying game and take on the form of heroes, villains and power players (Paragons)."

So I made a conscious decision to create a transmasc character and delve consciously and deeply into the act of catharsis. I have played trans characters before, (arguably ttrpgs are one of the ways I explored if I was trans but that's another story), but this was the first time I wanted to pull at the threads of my own confusion and sadness, trauma and regret. To work through my grief.

In real life, it's difficult to put into words the grief I am going through with my parents. It's a complex issue, but one of them is that my parents have always seen as me as their daughter, and all three of us cannot imagine me being anything else to them. My father has always pointedly interacted with my brother as a son, and has always faltered when I failed to act like the daughter.

It's hard to grieve because there are thousands of subtle nuances—their love for me, borne from endless sacrifice and hope, also places chains on me. To break those chains is to break them, to keep those chains on is to break me. I have broken myself over the decades, again and again, and there is never a shape that will please us three.

So for DIE I created a more intense caricature of fatherly trauma. Almost cartoonish in his abuse, with no room for nuance. Somehow in describing the black and white nature of this fictional father, and how it shaped my character, it's easier for me to see the shades of grey that my real father is. It's easier to find the shadows of me there too.

I realized today that in DIE, this traumatizing figure also contains the fear I had. Conditioned to be a woman, where my very existence can trigger violence from men. There are many reasons it took me so long to know I was trans, but one of those reasons was that I could not imagine taking on the shape of an oppressor.

It didn't matter that I knew many men who were gentle, loving, and kind. It didn't matter that what men are does not have to be defined by the patriarchy. Men were dangerous until I knew better. Men could betray my trust and become dangerous once they got to know me. Why would I want to take on the shape of something dangerous and harmful?

Today I explored a part of that. As an Emotion Knight my character draws upon the emotion of loathing—what better way to draw upon an aspect of gender dysphoria? To become strong, to fight, I had to give in just enough to my father's voice, its whispers from the war hammer in my hand. I had to take on his cruelty, the loathing I had for him and myself. I described the danger of falling into unthinking violence, to protect what matters to me. I was standing on the precipice, knowing I was a breath away from going too far.

All of this made it easier to see my real father, standing at the end of a corridor I will never reach. It feels like if I walk towards him, the corridor will stretch on and on, made of all the doors of all the daughters I could have been for him. One of them, any of them, would be better than what I am now.

That moment of catharsis felt breathless. I could feel myself falling towards the doors. Then I looked at the other players, and I could see all of them feeling for my character. Feeling for his pain, for his hope. Watching him stumble towards the edge. I could feel their hearts surrounding mine.

I don't remember what I said to Sherri, in character. I know I wanted her to pull my character back into this fictional moment. I know I wanted Sherri to pull me back into this reality, with her. Away from the corridor. It was enough that I saw the corridor for what it is, that I knew all its doors. That I knew they could never be opened.

This dance of catharsis feels safe. It's hard to describe how it's still fun, and wonderful, to connect to my friends' characters. To check-in and feel out if we were still having fun, trusting in the play, trusting in each other.

The game session ended hours ago, and we'll play again next week. But the corridor is still with me, and I feel it stretching behind me. I feel all its doors. When I close my eyes, I see my father's back, walking away from me.

Maybe next week I'll try walking down that corridor. Maybe I'll call out to my father, knowing he won't turn around. Maybe I'll leave it behind. Maybe I won't do anything for now, because grief takes time. I don't know.

I just know that I'm very grateful to be here, to be loved, to play. I'm grateful for the stories we tell together, and how it can help us retell our own stories about ourselves.

This story of grief is hard, but I'm grateful. It means I chose to survive, to live, to be me.

It hurts to choose myself over my parents love for me, but I'm glad I'm doing it. I'm choosing all the people who love me, who see me when I cannot yet clearly see myself.

#transgender #gender dysphoria #ttrpgs #play diaries #play culture

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cringefailvox · 8 months ago

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overlord husk aus are very interesting to me in part because they present such a radically different vision of the huskerdust dynamic that is very compelling to me. present-day husk and angel are exhausted. these are people genuinely at rock bottom, who have been so worn down and chipped away at by the long, dragging stalemate of their circumstances that they have nothing left to give but their bare minimum selves. which is okay, and it's enough for them; a lot of what makes their dynamic so interesting is that it's about two people at their lowest rediscovering what it feels like to not be alone down there, to even begin thinking about the possibility of climbing out of the deep dark hole they've made their peace with now that they won't be doing it by themselves.

in contrast, overlord husk aus imagine a version of husk and angel before they were losers together. they imagine versions of them that haven't been beaten down all the way just yet: husk at the height of his greed and power and reckless addictions, angel riding the high of his stardom while adamantly refusing to peel back the surface and acknowledge the rot. both of them still digging the hole and saying to themselves, "i've got a ladder, i'm not going to get stuck. i can always climb back out."

and having these two meet at this stage in their lives, i think they would really, really not make each other better. husk's consideration for the souls on his chain had to have been close to zero for him to use them as gambling chips the way he did, especially the recklessly self-destructive way he did that ended with his own soul in alastor's pocket. and i imagine that for a long time, angel lived in total willful denial about val's escalating abuse and the toll his increasingly demanding job was taking on him, because acknowledging it would be tantamount to making it real, making it something that could actually hurt him and not just be rationalized away, and so of course he'd put off doing that for as long as he could.

if husk had actually won angel's soul, it wouldn't have been any different from all the other people he traded back and forth across his table just for the illicit thrill of the game. angel probably would've had a whole sunk-cost freakout about it (what was the point of all that pain and suffering and lack of autonomy if all the consequences are coming from a stranger now and not val? when it isn't personal? and now he can't even claim a little bit of power back by saying he chose it, because he didn't.) angel knows full well what it looks like when someone is going to kill themselves with their addictions, but what obligation does he have to the guy who would just as quick give him up to somebody else if it gave him an adrenaline rush? nothing, that's what, and he has enough of his own problems anyway.

crucially, they're both INCREDIBLY self-absorbed. not even in a conceited or vain way, but just in that they're so wrapped up in their own mess that they can't see beyond it, they don't have any space for empathy, and furthermore, they have no reason to even try.

it's why the version of their dynamic we get in canon works so well—they're in the same place now, at just the right time to finally start opening up their worlds to how they affect other people (angel watching charlie interact with val at the studio; husk being forced by alastor to engage with the hotel's residents as the bartender). there's space for empathy in their lives now, because they've finally been brought so low that they can't hide anymore, can't look away, can't deny how completely and totally fucked they are. it's a kind of brutal honesty that can only really come from confronting your absolute worst-case scenario. but for them to even begin connecting with each other in any authentic sense, they needed to have the ladder taken away so they could finally bring themselves to stop digging, look up, and realize there's been someone down here with them all along.

#g-d i hope this isn't incoherent i've just been Thinking abt them so much #maybe one day i'll write an overlord husk au.... or smthn similar like an alternate timelines fic where they realize this current iteration #of themselves is actually the best one #huskerdust #angel dust #husk #hazbin hotel #husker

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pinksobg · 10 months ago

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Why did this happen?

breathe and close your eyes to concentrate if you prefer. for reflection. hope you enjoy and it is insightful. ❤️

pile number 1 - Oh, yes, pile number 1. you went through a time of difficulty, scarcity, a place where you were not being treated fairly, you may have probably left an unbalanced place, where your voice was not heard and you felt rushed and devalued. That is really tough pile number 1, im really sorry to hear that. This happened because you deserved better. You deserved to leave this cramped space without scales, to a better place. Clearly a new place where you feel valued, heard and back in your personal power. you deserve the best. This situation may have been in a work environment, when rejecting a project or job proposal. But it can also be a friendship, a long-term relationship, among other varied aspects in your current reality.

cards - 5 of pentacles, queen of wands rx., temperance rx., king of pentacles.

card of advice - 9 of swords. If you are feeling very anxious, it is recommended that you visit a psychologist, therapist and return movement in your life, starting with something that you consider simple or easier, it could be cleaning something from your space and or physical exercise if it is possible. thank you so much. take care. you matter.

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pile 2 - Oh, pile 2. It's an intense energy, I tried to prepare myself as much as possible to transmit this message. It is very likely that you have gone through a situation where you cannot be the charitable, kind and loving person that you are. You had to fight not to get hurt on this situation, whether by setting limits or trying to trust yourself again. In other words, if you didn't raise your guard you would have continued in a very exhausting cycle. It may have been an argument, a fight, a cut in something that you may have asked yourself 'but I don't act like this normally, what happened to me'. These thoughts may have occurred because you are a really good person and may not be used to putting yourself first. you were spiritually guided. Strongly, I'm listening. You may have had digestive system problems probably due to stress.

But hey, here we go again. You were guided to the best path, to choose what is good for you and also choose what is choosing you. You deserve to be the charitable person you are, to do that project that few believe in, to be your authentic truth. There is also a request to improve your spiritual protection, connect with your spirituality - more messages will arrive for you, good things. Take good care of yourself, don't be too alert, you are being taken care of, but also continue your journey of protecting yourself from what is bad for you, be it habits, people, spaces, etc. thank you very much. additional message - see you soon.

cards - 3 of pentacles, queen of cups rx, 9 of swords rx, 7 of wands rx, the lovers, the star.

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pile 3 - hii pile number 3! did you thought about something good that happened, right? This could be someone who defended you or someone who defended you without you even realizing it, 'behind the curtains' kind of thing. Or maybe you might be thinking about a crush or something that gives you happiness and a feeling of completeness, like working on something to improve your self-esteem.

In other words, you may have thought of a certain good thing that happened to you. If this is your case, my pile number 3, is because you deserve it - you radiate completeness, friendship, truth to people, you don't hide your true face. with the card of the lovers, the star, the world in a single reading - it could also have been a gift from the universe, a Divine gift.

-- With the clarification with the Page of Wands card, this may have pushed you to continue, think about your future, create new ideas, open new horizons and prepare you for what comes next on your journey. If something good happened to you after a difficult time, it could also have been a form of... kind of 'justice', from the universe towards you, my pile number 3. a plan, there is.

Four of wands also, how beautiful! Really, if you thought of something good, it really is a celebration that occurred around you. Congratulations, my pile number 3!! You overcame something, achieved something important, even if you may not even realize what it is - but in some cases, yes, it is possible to realize what you did. right. This deserves a celebration, congratulations my pile number 3! Take good care of yourself, I hope this message resonated and was useful to you. thank youu

-------- ❤️

#hope you enjoy :)#tarot community #pick a card #tarotblr #thank you #tarot reading #pick a pile #free tarot #pick a picture #tarot messages

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aeolianblues · 3 months ago

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I saw this company that sells like Bluetooth vibrating air drums or whatever you want to call them, and it’s so obvious what their purpose is that it makes me really sad. We went from drum kits to those black/deadened practice kits for practising at home, to eventually having people in rented accommodation being so worried about noise complaints and/or losing their place of living that they’ve had to create drum-less drums. 100% the reason for this is not wanting to get evicted. Living in matchbox houses with paper thin walls of cheap and in-no-way soundproof material, packed so close you’re a stone’s throw from your neighbours, you’ve silenced the drumkit entirely.

Is it any surprise then that people aren’t forming bands? Is it a surprise that artists moved from bands rehearsing in basements and garages in houses, to samples, electronic drumkits, midi, solo ‘bedroom’ stuff, even as we lose more and more rehearsal spaces, and schools stop offering kids musical lessons because they must be inferior to subjects that lead to a job in IT or finance? We lose youth centres, community spaces, musical spaces, and everyone’s world gets a little quieter.

Gentrification. People move into the ‘fun’ parts of town and then file complaints against all the ‘fun’ stuff. Bye bye La Tulipe, they gave a developer a building permit in the fucking downtown culture and entertainment district and now the residents are filing complaints. City councils are so afraid of the word 'rave', they don't know what it means but they think it means 'illicit drugs-taking event' and want to ban any instance of it. The raves move out of the city, to a little space under the national highway, or leave the city entirely.

I wanted to take a walking tour of historically important music sites in London, such as important venues, clubs, studios, the Blitz where the New Romantic kids first congregated for their David Bowie nights, the café where all the musicians including the Beatles would go down to to meet people when they decided the only way to make it in the music industry was to move to London. 3/4 of that tour involved looking for ghosts: empty spaces, corporate offices and residence buildings sitting on the burial grounds of moments of cultural significance. I didn’t do the tour, I don’t think I could bear to look at these places, to try and imagine what they once were and what their neighbours were.

It’s the same with these drums too. I know the makers only want to do good, bless them for that, and I don’t doubt a lot of people will find this a better practice solution than midi because it still sort of has that unquantised feel of a real person hitting sticks— although I suppose if you really think about it, it still is just a midi controller but with a vibrating haptic response. Next you’ll say drums can be done on AR or VR I suppose. It will still make me sad.

It saddens me that we lose so much of the spirit of art and culture to dilution. People trying to make the music quieter so as to not offend the neighbours, even as their spaces get slowly choked out. Writers being unable (/less freely able) to explore darker themes so as to not set the dogs of the ‘problematic writing police’ on them. Artists presenting as less dramatic so as to not appear ‘weird’ to an uninvested audience; TikTok’s obsession with their straitjacketed definition of ‘authenticity’. Making fun of anyone who dares to dress weird, look different, say something new. I see it everywhere. Art gets diluted to become palatable, and in doing so it loses its ability to express itself and say something that needs to be said.

I don’t know. Some could look at it as the weird, twisted, fucked up plant growing through cracks in the pavement, doing what it can to reach the sunlight. Art surviving despite everything, somehow being more poignant and having more important things to say as a result.

But even a 22h candle has an end. We’ve got to do more to protect our artistic spaces and outlets, and the ability to create without fear, or ae risk losing it forever. It takes just one generation to train out habits; we see it with other obsolete things, let’s not let art be one of those.

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iminyourwallsbabe · 1 month ago

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Yk what I feel like I haven't yapped about CaitVi enough and that's a disservice to my fellow sapphics so this word vomit is for you girl kissers out there

Okay so it goes without saying that CaitVi is kind of divisive. Some people love it 100%, some people think it could've worked better under different circumstances, and some people outright hate it, all viewpoints I understand. I'm the type of person who appreciates it for what it is.

I think the first thing I wanna touch on is the idea that their ending was supposed to be a happy one. I don't think it was. Honestly, I think it was more of a pause than anything. You weren't supposed to go "oh yay good for them", you were supposed to wonder what happens now. The end gives us, and the characters, an opportunity to just get our shit together and move on. So much just happened, there was little time to really, deeply think about it all. I'd like to think that they did work their shit out post-canon. However, I can see why people would think they wouldn't have.

I'm gonna go reverse chronological here. So one of the more glaring issues is whether or not Caitlyn switching sides was authentic and came from a place of genuine understanding of her mistakes. In my opinion, not quite. She was getting there but it would take the final battle for it to really set it. I said this in another post, but when she's sitting there before Ambessa, gun to the back of her head and knife in her side, she looks terrified. Obviously that shit is scary but it's more than that. Caitlyn is more afraid of dying than ever before, because if she died then, that would mean she had no way to fix what she had done. It was setting in just how badly she fucked up and now the entire world is at stake, and what can she do? Nothing. Think back to season 1 when her biggest gripe was not being allowed to do anything substantial or important. It's this again, just more extreme. She wanted to help people then, now she needs to and she can't.

And I think that's what she needed. She has never really been on the receiving end of the consequences of her actions. Not until then. As we've seen in the early parts of season 2, it weighs on her heavy when she thinks she's made a grave error. That's why she even started acting up in the first place. She's willing to abandon all of her morals and growth for the sake of remedying what she thinks she did. So with that in mind, I can imagine when she goes back to Vi, she feels the same if not worse because this time, what happened was actually her fault.

But now we need to talk about Vi and her place in all of this. One of many people's complaints is that Vi folds so easily when it comes to Caitlyn. And you're right, she folds like a fucking napkin but that's not just "oh I'm in love so I'm gonna do whatever for my girlfriend", it's more than that and has nothing to do with Caitlyn specifically. First of all, she has been stuck in Stillwater since she was a teen and hasn't seen the light of day in 7 years. MIND YOU, when she went to jail she was separated from her sister, who at that moment was her only living family member. OH YEAH DID WE FORGET THAT HER ENTIRE FAMILY DIED IN FRONT OF HER THAT SAME NIGHT? It is not a surprise to me at all that she clung to Caitlyn like saran wrap. That tends to happen when you're that fucking lonely. I'm of the belief that it could've been any other woman in the world instead of Caitlyn and she still would've acted the same. I also think that's part of the reason she joined the enforcers. Vi probably thought she was going to lose Caitlyn if she didn't. That doesn't really have anything to do with Caitlyn, that's an internal thing. Again though, are we really surprised that she'd get that desperate? But wait! There's more. After she does join and she tries to call Caitlyn out when she's done too much, it goes very wrong. It's at this point that some people wonder why she didn't just go back to Ekko instead of acting like she was all she had left. I need y'all to be so fr, you think Ekko would've been cool with that? And don't say "oh but he's so forgiving to Jinx" or something, that's just not true. He knows she's dangerous to the people of Zaun and can't personally allow that in his space or his life. It doesn't make it hurt any less but he's very clearly not having that shit. The same would've happened with Vi. She would've came back, he would've been like "I love you but FUCK NAH", and season 2 would've been exactly the same. She would've had to do some serious convincing.

But I say that to say that realistically, Caitlyn was all she had. She couldn't go back home after doing what she did, she definitely couldn't go to Jinx, everybody else is dead, that was it for her. Now we're in the glorious crash out era. I think there's something to be said about the glimpses of Caitlyn we get in that sequence. Those were hallucinations, going off of the fact that Jinx has her own and that more than likely, they share some of the same underlying mental illnesses. Breaking up with Caitlyn like that probably set it off. The straw was starting to break the camel's back. I also think it's interesting how Caitlyn left Vi similarly to how Vi (technically)left Jinx and that's when these issues start. I think it was a good way of showing that Caitlyn was right in a misguided sort of way. It is her blood in her veins. She is not that far off from Jinx, and they both can sit there and go "oh yeah she's crazy" all they want but Vi and Caitlyn were both one or two crash outs away from being like her. If anything, you can argue they kind of got there. Both of their ways of dealing with their pain involved hurting people. Caitlyn with her military dictatorship and attempted mass murder, Vi with her pit fighting, it's not at all the same in severity but conceptually... yeah, all of y'all are of fucked up.

You know I sometimes made jokes about how Caitlyn looks like Vi's mom and kind of acts like Jinx/Powder and how Freud would've had a field day with that but that's not exactly what's happening. I mean the mom thing is still a little sus but like I said before, they both have Jinx tendencies. If anything, Vi sees a reflection of herself in Caitlyn, because one of the big differences between the three of them is that what Vi and Caitlyn do is controlled. Caitlyn enacts violence through military means and generally gets permission to do the things that she does. Vi fights in a pit, that's the time and place for that. Jinx kind of does whatever she wants, except for when her mind/body makes decisions for her. She goes into panic mode and she shoots something, it's almost a natural instinct. If it's not that, it's kind of just "I felt like it". Also, their fears are coming from slightly different places and manifest in different ways. Jinx doesn't trust anyone to stick around, so she tests them and pushes them away. Vi doesn't trust anyone to stick around so she does whatever she can to keep them with her. Caitlyn doesn't trust herself to keep the people she loves around, so she becomes overly protective of them. Are we seeing what I'm saying here? It's like a hall of mirrors with these three but we're not here to talk about their relationship to Jinx, we're here to talk about them.

With this in mind, let's talk about the Fantastic CaitVi Coping and Communication Skills!!!! So the first thing they do when they join sides again is just be freaky as fuck. Like you think Vi spitting on her was a necessary part of the plan? Hell nah! Like honestly you could shoot a hole through the sexual tension between them good lord. Some people argue that the sex scene was unnecessary but looking at how they were acting before that? I'm not surprised that it went the way it did. Jokes aside though, seriously, the fact that they hadn't really addressed what happened properly and just went straight to pound town is so painfully on brand for both of them. Neither of them are good at addressing their issues. Post breakup, Vi became an emo alcoholic and Caitlyn became a whole ass dictator, I don't think they were gonna sit down and talk about their feelings. And honestly, I don't think that closure mattered nearly as much to them as it does to us as the audience. They have bigger issues, yk, like the glorious evolution and all that. Do I think that's necessarily a good thing? No. Do I think it's in character? Very. Anyway, this is why Vi is like "Cait, I don't fucking care" when she tries to begin saying anything about what she did when they were apart. She doesn't fucking care. Not at all. That's not what's important to her in that moment. It's also interesting that the first thing Caitlyn tries to apologize for is for sleeping with another woman, not trying to kill a whole bunch of her people. Notice how she went for the small thing first? She doesn't want to think about the other stuff. Neither of them do. And so they do what they do best and found a totally unhealthy distraction. In this case, it's ✂️🧁.

I think as a fandom we put too much emphasis on what's healthy in a show full of the most insane people I've ever seen. Trying to find a perfectly healthy relationship in this show is like trying to find a super niche website from 2003. You could probably do it but oh my fucking god would it take you a while. And y'all don't have nearly this much to say about Jayvik even though bro was like "ppl from the undercity are dangerous!!!" right to Viktor's face. Not to mention all the other issues they got going on. Jayce straight up killed a child with Hextech, like let's be fr. They're not all sunshine and rainbows and if we're going to criticize CaitVi the way that we do, we gotta have the same energy for Jayvik.

Anyway, I say all that to say that it's hard to focus on what the most therapist approved decision for your relationship is in these conditions and it doesn't make a ship any worse because of that.

I also don't like the idea that it's too unhealthy to be functional. It has the potential to get better and it's implied by the ending that it does, or at least starts to. Think about it like this, if two people on opposite sides of the political spectrum are friends, what do you assume is actually happening there? One party has to be compromising on their beliefs. There's no other way. If you cared so strongly about something, it'd be hard to keep company that opposes it. It's like that with CaitVi. They were on two different sides of a war and Caitlyn had to shift what she believed in order to even befriend Vi let alone be her lover. That whole "oh ur all the same" bit had to go. If anything, it makes me believe that end of season 2 CaitVi is actually healthier than season 1 CaitVi on a fundamental level. Caitlyn's view of Zaunites by the end of season 1 is attached to Vi. Vi was one of the good ones, Vi proved that there was some hope for those people, Vi was an exception. This is why she got so mad in season 2 when Vi tried to tell her she was bugging out. That's why she says "it's her blood in your veins" with so much vitriol. She gets indirectly victimized by a Zaunite, who has already been established as an extremist, and all of a sudden everybody down there is bad again. If you care about them at all you're bad too. At the end of season 2, Caitlyn is amused when she notices that Jinx is still alive. If that doesn't say anything about how much she's developed I don't know what does. Even if she doesn't like her, she doesn't have that same blind hatred anymore and that's the part we have to pay attention to. She's gotten to a point where she thinks even Jinx should have the opportunity to have a second chance. I'd rather date that than Caitlyn "wait you don't have parents?" Kiramman.

That's basically it, shout out to the writers for actually knowing how classism/racism/all the isms tbh actually work and what it looks like to change your beliefs as a a beneficiary of those systems, goodnight

#arcane #arcane s2 #arcane spoilers #caitvi #analysis #arcane analysis #piltovers finest #piltovers gayest #violyn #caitlyn kiramman #caitlyn arcane #vi arcane

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fanbynature · 1 year ago

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A post from Dani Howe, who recently left smosh after working in the marketing team

"From Pet to Threat" - This just happened to me AGAIN and after 10+ years in this biz, I’m sick of having to get over it in silence for fear of being blacklisted, or labeled as “difficult to work with” because I chose to be open about my working experience. I won’t go into details, as this isn’t meant to be that kind of post, but I want to share this research because the “Pet to Threat" phenomena keeps happening to me and so many of my peers, particularly over the last few years here in LA. It’s truly an abusive cycle that repeats for far too many people in the workplace, but especially and aggressively for Black women in the entertainment/media industry. So many of us work extremely hard from a place of love, peace and genuine passion for our crafts. We choose to put our prowess out there, hoping that it’ll be reciprocated with that same authenticity by our leadership/mentors/peers, only to be undermined and vehemently devalued in favor of this insistence for power and control at every turn. I’ll never understand the need to prioritize pettiness & ego over doing the right thing for another team member or putting the best, most collaborative work out there for your company. What’s the point of hiring an expert or someone with big potential, just to diminish them? I'm tired of entering spaces I was promised were full of golden potential and stability, only to have to abruptly leave that space a short while later, lest endure unsafe + toxic working dynamics if I choose to brave it. The feelings of shame, guilt and confusion that come after are all too familiar, and yet they never get any easier to deal with. Constantly being in an anxious place of trying to figure out what went wrong and changing my approach, while the world you left couldn’t even be bothered to think twice about you, feels like a losing game. Why even play anymore? I'm only left jobless with no prospects, broke, and burdened with heavy feelings of sadness that I feel really dumb for having. Because it’s just a job, right? And the house always wins.

Some of you might question why even share all of this. Well, I fully believe transparency is one of the best ways to educate and inspire those around you. By sharing this article and a bit about my experience, I hope others feel encouraged to choose themselves and stop letting lazy business practices suppress their potential. I have no idea what’s next for me - this post has probably tanked any chance of me continuing a career in entertainment marketing. But what I do know is that I’m not accepting being overlooked anymore. Not having my true potential nurtured or recognized because the mentors I believed in would rather act out of insecurity than help me thrive is total BS. I deserve better than that, and so do you. I hope today is the day you know your worth."

Im interested in who are they going to blame now. It was once Defy - but now that it's in the hands of the original creators and owners - the same mistakes seem to be popping up. Hmmm

Also if fans start villanizing her the way they did with Boze and Saige - 👊👊👊 i will find you and i will punch u in the fucking face

#also the fact that it's mainly women of colour that are leaving that place #recently #smosh #smoshblr #youtube #behind the scenes

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fourteentrout · 11 months ago

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Azriel had waited. He had waited for five hundred years to find his mate. His equal.

That's the kicker, wasn't it? His equal. How could he find that, when he was Death itself. When he looked into the bloody mouths of his victims, Truth Teller in his grasp, and he could not see anything but his own reflection staring back at him. Built upon fingernails and severed toes, built upon a burst of blue that burnt like fire, built upon a blade that sang when it cut through flesh. Calculated death, something beyond rage, something beyond a quest for justice. Something not borne out of impulse or uncontrolled power, but out of a carefully constructed network of lacerations, each placed with more thought than the last.

What, out there, was equal to that?

Oh, how cruel, he thought.

Is this what it is? Is this what an equal is? Someone with fists wreathed in flame, who could wield what Azriel's hands hadn't been able to survive.

Fire itself mated to the burnt.

Someone tortured, mated to a torturer.

How cruel to him, he thought, flames dancing in his head.

Was it cruelty, though? Or simply justice? That fire lord with lashes across his back was no hero. He was the worst of the worst, and his pain didn't make him any better. It just made him both the victim and the tyrant. It allowed him to play both sides. He himself was cruel.

Eris was nothing like who Azriel had thrown himself at. Eris was unkind, unable to wield his flaming hands with the same delicate niceness of Elain. Eris was a sneaky, manipulative, slithering thing, a stranger to the blunt authenticity of Mor. Eris would never be able to turn to the sunlight the way she did. Eris would never be able to speak with words like honey the way Elain did.

Azriel had never earned those words, anyway.

This is what it is, then, he thought. Two people who got exactly what they deserved. Fated to share something so pure, so clean, with someone who was decidedly not. The thing he had slogged through five centuries of silent desperation for a female who would never love him back for, finally granted to him--only with someone just out of reach. Perhaps, if he wanted, he could reach out a hand.

But he didn't want to. It was easier to stay angry, easier to pretend that he didn't deserve something as honorable as a mating bond, like he had during those five hundred years of waiting.

He did, though. He was getting exactly what he paid for.

His hands were soaked with the blood of a thousand, a hundred thousand, too many for Azriel to feel bad for. Eris' hands burst with the same flame that had once bathed Azriel's own. They delivered each other's scars, Azriel supposed. His mottled skin would be familiar to Eris. How many people has he burned, Azriel wondered. The scars that littered Eris' perfect High Fae body were the same Azriel imparted dutifully upon anyone unlucky enough to find themselves in his chamber. How cruel, to look at the one tied to your soul and see an assignment. The same methodical job he imparted on the prisoners in the dungeons, blanketing the one he was supposed to be able to look at reverently. How could he?

Eris was always a slimy bastard, anyway. Azriel could never love him, just as he would never love Azriel. It was upon principle, more than anything.

And perhaps it was easier that way. Perhaps his hands would thank him, kept safe from the fire that they still shied away from, centuries later.

How cruel, he thought as his chest throbbed with that bond.

Azriel had waited his whole life for something he knew, in his soul, he would never deserve. But of course, the Mother found Her ways. To give him what he wanted more than anything in the world.

To give him something he would never be able to have.

Not when he was one who supplied torture, and his mate was one who received it. Not when he was scarred with burns, and his mate could light the fire with half a thought.

How cruel, he thought, that I could not have been better. That I could not have become someone able to earn something good.

That even the mating bond could be twisted into something to punish him, something to prove his unworthiness. It was right there, and yet he couldn't have it. Would never be able to face that. The fact that he and his mate were everything that had made the other suffer. Why, he wondered, had he wanted it so? Had he not realized that to be granted that, he would have to look into the eyes of another and see himself reflected back? The one person that could break him.

After a lifetime of waiting, he had finally gotten what he wanted. But he had also finally gotten what he deserved.

#azris #i dont know what this is lmao #but like #theres just so much to say about the tragedy of their pairing #something something your equal includes everything youve come to hate about yourself #azriel #azriel x eris #eris #eris vanserra #azriel shadowsinger #my writing #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #acotar drabble #azriel acotar #eris acotar #azriel spymaster

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kartoonatic · 3 months ago

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The Amazing Digital Circus Ep. 4 - Thoughts on Gangle

As I said before I’m a big “themes” guy and I was making some connections while watching the newest ep. Here are my thoughts on how Gangle’s character design visually represents a lot of what she goes through in this episode, and how this ep expanded on her inner world and coping skills.

Spoilers Ahead

And disclaimer: I don’t care if you think this is obvious and I don’t care if you think it’s not that deep.

Now:

There are two main elements of this last episode I wanna talk about - Gangle’s masks and the setting being a fast food place.

Gangle is a ribbon body with two different faces, a tragedy mask and comedy mask. She takes on the emotions of whichever mask she’s wearing as soon as she puts it on, meaning she’s either at an extreme joyful high or an extreme depressive low. In Ancient Greece where the tragedy and comedy masks were rumored to originate, actors would wear them to better telegraph those emotions to audience members sitting far away (this is relevant). What’s especially interesting to me is that Gangle wears one on top of each other, making it so when she’s hit hard or stumbles her comedy mask shatters and reveals her tragedy mask underneath.

To the actual episode, I believe the reason Gangle acts the way she does is because she knows at the beginning the new mask doesn’t change her but she’s trying to make it work. I think that she was the one who suggested the fast food adventure at some point because it’s familiar to her (she was a manager in her normal life) and she took initiative in being the manager again because she wanted to engage in that very grounded kind of experience. Day to day in the Digital Circus is intense and abstract, I feel like she wanted a chance to feel normal again, and working customer service provides that sense of complete mundanity.

Here’s when I really begin to enjoy the way the masks represent Gangle’s coping method. This new mask she wears through out the episode is the face she puts on to hold it together. It’s possible to mask mostly for yourself, and people often do, but for a lot of people masking is solely for the benefit of *other people’s comfort*. She’s putting on the mask to get work done. When she wears it she’s upbeat, she’s assertive, she holds people accountable, and she’s got a “can-do-it” attitude the bosses probably love. But something’s really off about her to everyone else. They know she’s not typically assertive and the way she’s behaving feels unnatural to them, but she steps into a leadership role here for the sake of engaging in this fast food role play. So she can feel “normal” even if only temporarily. This is my projection, but I think one of the reasons Jax and Ragatha’s comments cut her so deeply was because she’s not behaving that way because it’s authentic to who she is. She’s doing it to hold things together. For the benefit of everyone else and the "company".

My favorite parts of this episode were the moments of monotony and the bits of silence where the relative normalcy of the situation just hangs. Watching that clock stand still, the changes in lighting throughout the day, the quietness at closing. It brings out a side of everyone I really like to see especially in Gangle. Gangle's emotional center *is* this food joint, this stale representation of "normalcy". In the Digital Circus she's forced to inhabit two emotional extremes every hour of every day. It makes sense that she desires a neutral ground, and the fast food place she used to work might be the only way she can conceptualize that. The setting is corporate, impersonal, and monotonous, but also familiar and has clear policies for how to behave. While she’s here, Gangle *presents* herself as feeling less extreme and upbeat, but that presentation isn’t true to her, and it’s certainly not healthy.

It's worth noting, given the context that Gangle's dream was to be a comic artist, the fast food place can also represent "normal" in the sense that it's a "normal job", an honest job, a stable job. Here Gangle is a normal, honest, stable person mentally and emotionally. Or at least that's likely what she told herself in the real world when she really had to show up every day and play the role perfectly at the risk of a write up.

As the day goes on we see more and more cracks in her armor, and while this new mask won’t break it doesn’t change the fact that she’s still got the tragedy mask hiding underneath. What really saves her from going to a very dark place fast is the fact that Zooble and Pomni recognize what’s going on with her and step in to offer her a bit of relief. I’d argue that so far Zooble and Pomni are the most honest of the cast, with Zooble being a bit more jaded. When Pomni offers to close for Gangle she’s basically giving her permission to drop the act. She allows Gangle to walk out the restaurant, where she’s not being held hostage by her coworkers or customers or the threat of corporate punishment, and feel at the intensity she needs to feel at. Zooble essentially reassures her that she’s wanted in the group even at her emotional lows.

I like the insight this provided into everyone’s character. Ironically I think what’s revealed about Zooble in this ep is more interesting to me than what we learned in the last one. I like knowing how these people treat each other under certain circumstances. It’s subtle and welcomes interpretation. love what they did with Gangle’s character, I like the way they wrapped this one up, and girl I hope you

#tadc #the amazing digital circus #tadc gangle #tadc pomni #tadc zooble #media analysis #let me know what u think in the replies #i also have thoughts on what this revealed about Jax and Ragatha but thats a separate post

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milkywayan · 1 year ago

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Do you have any recommendations for books about the everyday lives of medieval people? The last two that I’ve read were just disappointing, leaning far more into sensationalism than anything, and not taking into account the changes in worldview and society between then and now. I love everyday history of how people went about their lives, from how they made breakfast and what they wore, to the games they’d play to pass time and what they thought of their place in the universe. I love your historical posting and was curious if you had any recommendations for non-disappointing books to read! (I read better in English than German, but either would be appreciated!)

Cool to hear you are interested in 'domestic history' as it is often called!

I read these kinds of books mostly in german as I am interested in central european medieval times, as most english books are about britain and france. So I am sorry, most of this stuff is German.

Personally I was very, very happy with 'Wien in Mittelalter' by Peter Csendes & Ferdinand Opll, which is as the title says about Vienna in medieval times (from ~900 until 1529, which is the date set as the end of the medieval times in austria). First half is a timetable for each year, based on documents found in the archives to state what happened. Not only what kings and dukes did, but also e.g. 'Frenz sued his neighbour because his window is built wrong'. Tells you a lot about things people cared about. Second half describes in detail how e.g. the city was divided, how it was governed, how people lived etc. I really, really liked it, but it is mostly about Vienna and its Bürger and thus does not go into detail of the world beyond.

In addition to that, speaking of Vienna, there is the Geschichte Wien Wiki, which is one of the best history wikis in the world! So much details and also images of a lot of maps and stuff, it is great!

Another book I am currently reading (and loving) is also German, called 'Unerhörte Frauen' by Henrike Lähnemann and Eva Schlotheuber, and is about medieval nuns, mostly of the late 15th century in Germany. It discusses diaries of nuns and also explains how they lived, how the cloister was set up, how their education looked like, etc. It is really nice and it is very well researched, putting attention to often ignored women!

When it comes to food I generally read the actual recipe books from the time, as it is the best representation for it. There are also a lot of blogs from reenactors talking about it. For example this blog where some of my friends are involved, focused in 14th century cooking (also german).

I also recommend this blog by an Austrian reenactment group, where they talk about a lot of cool medieval topics. They are very passionate and have a lot of references (also German but have some posts also in english)

Going more specific and maybe boring there is this 7 book set about the finds of excavations in London. I have two of them by now, and it is quite cool to see what people used, how it looked like, what was common, what stuff was made of. But it is very thechnical/academic, so maybe not what you may be looking for. My reenactment friends and I love these books because it helps a lot in recreating stuff authentically.

Otherwise I read not that many books about medieval life, I mostly read research stuff and read medieval literature (I made a long post about it a while back) and talk with my nerdy friends about it

I hope this is useful!

Any of my followers, feel free to add if you know cool books and stuff :)

#personal #medieval #medievalcore #ask #anon

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jae-bummer · 2 years ago

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An Absolute Pinecone

Request: 2,7,8 vernon?

Prompt:

2) "Don't look at them. Look at me."

7) "We really need to stop meeting like this."

8) "I saw you looking at it last time we were in the store together, so I got it for you."

Pairing: Seventeen Vernon x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Taking a deep breath, you shouldered your way into the crowded restaurant. There was no special occasion to celebrate, no person you were going to meet for a few drinks. It was just you and your endless thoughts driving you toward some form of comfort.

The restaurant had been your favorite before, and it was still allowed to be your favorite after. Just because you dragged some guy you were dating here nearly every weekend he had off, didn't mean the place was tainted now. He probably didn't even remember where it was, let alone that they had a pork nurungji gangjeong that he was obsessed with.

Big, stupid, dumb boy who definitely didn't trash your heart and totally understood every reason you gave for breaking up.

Navigating toward the host stand, you took a place in line and crossed your arms. Normally you made reservations for a place so popular, but today, you had every intention of perching yourself at the bar and having a dinner for one.

"You know, we really need to stop meeting like this," a familiar voice chimed behind you.

You closed your eyes and attempted to stifle the groan forming in the back of your throat. Why was he here?

"Hey," you managed, turning around.

Hansol Vernon Chwe.

You couldn't help it as your eyes roamed over his body. It was infuriating how someone who could make you feel so bad could simultaneously look so good.

Your relationship has begun to fall apart only a few weeks ago. It originally seemed like the two of you were a good fit. He was one of the goofiest people you had ever met and was so authentically Vernon. He knew how to make you laugh and even better, knew how to laugh at himself.

The two of you managed to live in the bubble of your own world for a while. You knew in the long run it wouldn't be easy to date someone in his profession. It took an immense amount of patience, understanding, and communication. You both were great at those first two points, but communication had become increasingly difficult.

Vernon tended to have a very one-track thought process. He was constantly lost in his own world, and if something wasn't happening directly in front of him, it was often out of sight out of mind. With his recording, practicing, and touring, you were very often that thing that was forgotten.

"Hey," he said pleasantly.

You watched as a boxy grin appeared easily on his handsome face. After all you had said to him (and regretted), he still could look upon you fondly.

"How-How are you?" you asked. You could do pleasantries. He wasn't a nefarious villain or anything.

"I've been better," he chuckled, stuffing his hands deep into his pockets. "What about you?"

"Great," you lied with a small nod. "Things are-"

"Good evening," the hostess cut you off. "Do you have a reservation?"

"Oh no," you said quickly, motioning over to the bar. "I was going to-"

"Actually, we do," Vernon nodded as he stepped forward. "It's under Hansol Chwe."

You looked to him with wide eyes, doing your best to not panic. Why on earth would he think you wanted to have dinner with him? Why would HE want to have dinner with YOU?

"It's okay, you really don't have to-"

"Excellent, I found you in the system," the hostess smiled. "Follow me."

Vernon began to follow and looked back at you with a sly smile. He lifted his brows quickly as if to say, "want to make a bad decision"? You felt your mouth open, but swiftly close. Struggling over your own feet, your body had decided to follow.

"Alright, well, you're all set!" the hostess nodded. "Someone from the wait staff will be with you shortly."

Nonchalantly picking up the menu in front of him, Vernon began to scan the food options. You narrowed your eyes, completely flabbergasted with him.

"I wanted to say this in a kind way," you said slowly. He glanced at you over his menu and waited. "But honestly, Vernon, what the fuck?"

He immediately grinned and let out a small huff of amusement. "Did you not want to have dinner tonight?"

"Not with you!" you gasped. "We broke up. You were there. Don't you remember?"

"Of course, I do," he said, his smile immediately evaporating from his features. It felt like a punch to the gut knowing you were the cause for its disappearance. "You probably couldn't see with everyone standing around, but the bar was full."

"Oh," you said weakly. You played nervously with the corners of your menu. "I...I didn't mean to crash your evening. You made a reservation for yourself?"

"Nope, both of us," he hummed, his eyes never leaving the menu.

"B-Both of us?" you stuttered. "What do you mean?"

Vernon looked up again, his eyes finally meeting yours. "I've booked a reservation at this restaurant every weekend since we broke up. Party of two, usually an actual party of one staying for the whole meal."

You lifted your brows and remained silent. How were you supposed to handle that information?

"I didn't know when you were coming back," he sighed. "But I wanted to be here when you did."

"Why?"

You felt completely lost. The two of you had only been broken up for two or three weeks at this point, but to come to this place in hopes of bumping into each other...you weren't sure if it was delusional or kind of sweet.

This time Vernon sat down his menu and swiveled his body toward you. "Because I've been an absolute pinecone. Your words, not mine, but pretty accurate."

You went to speak but couldn't find the words. This may had been the creepiest way to go about seeing you again, but admittedly, you hadn't given him a whole lot of options.

Vernon chewed the corner of his lip, obviously uncomfortable with your silence. His brows furrowed as he waited.

"Are you two ready to order?" your server asked, finally appearing at your booth. You looked to Vernon who was still focused on you, and then back up to the server.

"I think we need a few minutes."

"Y/N," Vernon sighed. He reached forward in an attempt to grab your hands, but immediately stopped himself. Withdrawing them back to his lap, you could see a blush creeping up his neck. Somehow you had managed to completely fluster him without saying a word at all. Clearing his throat, he tried to start again. "I...um...I didn't really understand until you had stopped returning my calls."

You shook your head, unsure of what he meant.

"The silence stung," he admitted. "But it was effective. I've been wanting to just...be with you...like in the same room. It was actually becoming an ache.

"Vernon," you croaked. You had been thinking that you were the only one who had felt that awful brand of heartbreak. You thought he would go back to his normal routines, go back to being the chaotic golden doodle of a boy that he was.

"Let me finish," he whispered, clearly gathering his confidence again. "I put you on the back burner way more than what was fair. I didn't even realize how it was making you feel...even when you told me. I thought it couldn't be as bad as you said. Then I went into my phone and saw how many times I hadn't remembered to text you or call you back..."

"You're an idol," you interrupted. You felt guilt knowing that he was now experiencing the same things you had. Sure, you could hurt from it, but you still loved him enough to want to protect him. "I knew what I had signed up for...I'm just not the person who can withstand it I guess."

"But you could," he insisted. "If I had supported you."

Intaking a deep breath, you let it out slowly. You looked down to your hands now clenched in your own lap. You had spoken for hours when you had finally broken up. You tried to make him understand how unhappy things were, but he had never seen it. He insisted that even when he was busy, you had been at the forefront of his mind. You were a window always open in his browser, just not one he got to click that often. To him, that meant that he did love you and he was paying attention...

...and you hadn't even thought to give him the chance to do better.

"I saw you looking at this the last time we were in the store together," he said quietly. Standing up, he pulled a small box from his pocket. Thinking for a moment, he chose to abandon his seat and sit back down in the booth beside you. He was cautious as he scooted closer, waiting for you to stop him. "So I got it for you."

You focused on the sadness in his eyes before looking down. In the small box sat a dainty necklace, a small charm hanging from the chain.

"I know you're not the type to have your affections bought," he continued. "But I thought that maybe this would help show you that I am paying attention. I do have a crazy amount of interest in you...I've just been a real dick about it."

"Vernon, I-" you began. Your thoughts were a whirlwind. It was difficult to think with him this close. He smelled so good and exuded such warmth. He was a ray of sunshine, and he was ready to do the work. It had taken time to get him there, but he really understood.

"Say yes," a girl squeaked at the table to the left of you.

You and Vernon looked from her and back to each other with wide eyes. "Does she think-"

"Say yes!" she said a little louder, clasping her hands before her chest.

You smiled to yourself before looking up at Vernon who was already laughing. Your eyes met and both of you fell silent.

"Let's do this," you whispered. Before you could think better of it, you grabbed his neck and yanked him forward. The passion behind his kiss was unmatched. He had clearly missed you and wanted to put all of that pent up energy into your lips.

You could tell he wanted to convey every promise he could. He wanted you to know that he was sorry and he was going to make this right. The long kiss morphed into more rushed, short kisses as his lips tried to get more and more of yours. It took a moment to remember where you were, but you quickly realized as you heard applause erupt around you.

"Congratulations!" the girl from the opposite booth yelled over the din. "Oh my God, I've always wanted to see an engagement in person!"

"An engagement," you croaked, your eyes whipping to Vernon. This caused him to laugh loudly. You looked back over to the girl and immediately tried to correct her. "No, we-"

Your eyes swept across the restaurant. Families, couples, and staff looked upon you kindly.

"Hey," Vernon whispered. He pressed a few fingers to your jaw and directed your focus back to him. "Don't look at them, look at me."

You took a deep breath, ready to argue about the ridiculousness of this entire situation.

"We're totally not engaged," he grinned. "But think of the free dessert we'll probably get if we let them think we are."

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kittyball23 · 1 year ago

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As a part 2 to the Floyd in World Tour thing, I think Floyd would take the hit in becoming a rock zombie to protect Poppy but used Hickory’s trick in using the gumdrops to prevent himself from becoming a rock zombie and while everyone thought Floyd was under the spell, Barb felt a hint of regret because she saw Floyd as a friend despite being a pop troll though felt conflicted about her choices when Poppy told her that what turning everyone into rock zombies is not harmony and Floyd openly admits about his past and how he was wrong to leave Branch behind and was not going to make the same mistake twice which brought the zombified Branch to tears as despite being a zombie, he was aware of what was going on around him and when Poppy destroyed the strings to turn the leaders of the other types of music, Floyd immediately ran to Branch’s side to check if he was okay and Branch just… broke down into tears of sorrow and joy, he was letting out his pain of Floyd and their older brothers leaving him but was happy that his favourite brother was staying by his side for good before they share a hug, showing their bond as a family and accepted that they can live in a world without music if it means staying together which touches those who watched them which they paid no mind too as Poppy joins the hug. That is when a heartbeat sound was heard and the ending plays out the same only with Floyd involved.

Alrighty, here' it is!

Between a Rock and a Hard Place - Part 2

The earsplitting guitar riff resonating in a reverberating echo throughout the entire, packed arena was many things - loud, skillful, powerful - but, above all, it was one-hundred percent authentic Rock.

It was one thing to don the look of a Rocker, but a whole other thing entirely to actually be able to play like one. That’s how Barb truly knew the strings’ power was working. And, while she would have preferred to have showcased it with the Queen of Pop, she supposed using any Pop Troll would suffice to display her point.

Only, this wasn’t just any Pop Troll. This was Floyd. The one who had been taken in by their very people and made one of their own with quite literally no strings attached… at least, until he had run away.

Barb could roll her eyes at that. Pop Trolls were soooo predictable, it drove her up the wall. Of course he would try to warn his own true kind. But, she thought with a malicious sort of grin, it was a futile effort in the end. Here he was, without a doubt one of them now, a Hard Rocker through and through, his fingers rapidly working the strings, tattooed chest puffed out in a display of boldness that she had yet to see in the reserved Troll, and black-streaked bangs swishing in front of his left eye with every motion he made. He was every bit Rock, down to his spike-studded bracelets and chic leather attire. Barb was proud of her work… but, strangely, another feeling pitted itself in her stomach. A strange feeling that continued to gnaw at her, almost like when Debbie had used her arm as a chew toy when the batty creature had been teething. One that the Rock Queen never fathomed herself having, and yet, it was there. Floyd, despite his Pop roots, had been a friend. Did he deserve this? To be reduced to nothing more than a mindless, headbanging zombie? And for that matter… did any one of the musical tribes’ Trolls?

But before she could allow herself to admit that it was in fact a feeling of regret she was harboring, Barb cast it away, zeroing in on what she had intended to do in the first place. This time, hopefully, there would be no other unforeseen circumstances to hinder her - namely, any other Trolls who would jump in the way to save their beloved Pop Queen, as first Branch, and then Floyd, had done.

“Finish her off.”

The order was firm and direct, not showing an ounce of hesitation. The sooner that this could be done the better for them all. She could only hope the Pop Queen wasn't this feisty once she was turned.

Floyd growled a noise of agreement, shredding out a few more hard-core notes from the guitar before aiming it at Poppy.

Instinct told the pink Troll to run, but she felt frozen in place. Floyd glared at her with glowering, red eyes and, not too far from him, Branch was as well. A chill ran down Poppy’s spine. They wouldn’t really hurt her, would they? It almost seemed like there was nothing that could be done.

At least, until the guitar’s aim was unexpectedly shifted to face Queen Barb instead.

When Floyd blinked again, it was the serene magenta that Barb had been so familiar with instead of the blood-red, and the sight of it shocked her.

“Wha - ? B-but… you’re supposed to be a Rock zombie?!” she sputtered, unable to make herself sound as fierce as she wanted to.

Floyd offered a simple explanation. “Gumdrops,” he said, popping the said candy out of his ears. They were soundproof, and quite delicious, able to tune out the powers of hypnotic music. He glanced at Poppy and gave her a small nod.

Barb frowned. “Give me that!” She reached for the guitar, but Floyd backed away.

“No, Barb,” he stated firmly, standing protectively in front of Poppy. “We’re not going to let you do this to anybody else. A world where everyone looks the same and sounds the same?...” He shook his head, the image he’d conjured nothing like a place where he’d want to live.

“That’s not harmony!” Poppy concluded for him.

Barb had gone silent with deep thought, and Floyd took the opportunity to dare a few steps closer to her, speaking sincerely. “Barb, if you won’t listen to Poppy, at least listen to a friend. I know you think this might be what’s best. I’ve been there before. I thought I was doing what was best when I was younger, too. But instead, I ended up leaving my baby brother all alone. I said I would come back - I thought I would come back - but I didn't… because I thought he would be okay. I realize now that this wasn’t the best decision I could’ve made. I missed my brother, and there really wasn't a time I didn't think of him. I regret what I did to this very day. And I don't want you to regret what you've done, Barb…”

The Rock Queen was stunned. She didn't think she would be buckling in, her moral compass shifting to something softer.

And then, they heard a sniffle coming from behind them.

“Floyd…”

The magenta-haired Troll was surprised to find that it was Branch. Despite his zombified state, it seemed he was plenty aware of the happenings occurring around him, and had heard the confessions of his brother loud and clear. Tears had pooled in his reddened eyes, and the blue Troll shot him a gracious grin.

That was when Barb snapped back to the situation at hand. Seeing that Floyd was distracted and had slackened his grip on the guitar, she lunged, snatching it from his grasp.

Floyd gasped, while Poppy acted quickly. She ran past Floyd, latching onto the neck of the guitar and refusing to let go.

“Buzz off, Popsqueak!” Barb snarled.

“No!” the pink Troll shouted. “A good queen listens,” Poppy explained as they wrestled over the powerful instrument. “Real harmony takes lots of voices. Different voices!”

Managing to wrench the guitar free, Poppy raised it high over her head with both hands and then slammed it down onto the stage in a great big SMASH!

The guitar shattered into pieces with the terrible sounds of squealing feedback. And there, just like that, the six musical strings were destroyed!

A sonic-like explosion of color resulted, before it all got suddenly sucked away in a vacuum-like vortex. A bland, dull gray filled the arena - no Troll was left their vibrant, old self. But, they were not Rock zombies either. With the strings destroyed, King Trollex, King Quincy, Queen Essence, Trollzart, Delta Dawn, and all the other Trolls from each tribe who had been turned went back to their normal selves.

When Branch also returned, Poppy and Floyd immediately flanked his sides in a mixture of joy and relief.

“Branch! Are you alright?” Poppy asked worriedly.

He nodded slowly, offering a small gin of reassurance, and then turned to Floyd. “Did you really mean what you said?” he asked in a hushed tone.

“Every word of it,” Floyd replied. “And I’m not leaving your side again. Whether we have music, or not.”

At that moment, the tears returned to Branch’s eyes and he tugged his brother in for a tight embrace. Their elder siblings may not have been there, but for now, he was okay if they just had each other. Poppy snuggled into the hug as well, happy for them.

The trio’s moment, however, was short-lived. Barb had stood up, the initial shock of the strings having crumbled to dust also disintegrating, and making way for anger. “Give it up, everybody!” she shouted with raging sarcasm. “Thanks to the queen of Pop, we’ve ALL lost our music! History repeats itself. Pop has ruined EVERYTHING!”

All the Trolls looked devastated. Silence filled the air. A world where everyone was a Rock Troll was not ideal. But… neither was a world without any kind of music.

But then…

THUMP. THUMP-THUMP. THUMP-THUMP.

A rhythm was heard.

Cooper realized it was his heart beating. He held a microphone to his chest so everyone could hear it. Now amplified, his heartbeat sounded like a bass drum. THUMP-THUMP. THUMP-THUMP. THUMP-THUMP.

Next to him, his brother, Prince D, started beatboxing over the sound of the heartbeat.

Queen Essence beamed at her husband, King Quincy. “Those are my sons, making music!” she exclaimed proudly.

The Country Western Trolls began to stomp their feet in time to the rhythm, doing a line dance.

Poppy, Branch, and Floyd all looked astonished.

“Queen Barb can’t take away something that is inside us,” Queen Essence declared, “because that’s where music really comes from. Not from some string. Inside all of us.”

Nodding, King Trollex added, “It comes from our experiences…”

“Our lives…” Delta Dawn pitched in.

“Our culture…” Queen Essence finished.

Poppy realized that they were all right. “Queen Barb can’t take that away,” she agreed. She turned to the crowd, took a deep breath, and started to sing in time with the rhythms the Trolls were making. “Let me hear you sing….”

And, with Poppy’s voice echoing through the arena, Branch and Floyd added their voices alongside hers, singing in perfect harmony.

“Sing it together, louder than ever, forget everything, just sing….”

#trolls #trolls 3 #trolls 2 #trolls world tour #trolls band together #floyd trolls #branch trolls #poppy trolls #barb trolls #dreamworks #fanfiction #kittyball writes #thanks for the ask!#kittyball answers

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