#and the same about crash everyone's future
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gor3sigil · 1 day ago
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"But whyyyy did u transition if it's to be gender non comforming/still dress "like a girl"/not change your gender marker/yada yada"
Why ? Because I can. As privileged as it sounds, I want to show everyone that it's a path worth taking. Because I firmly believe that people should do whatever the fuck they want if it makes them more comfortable in their skin. Because I got told all my fucking life that my body didn't belong to ME, but to my future husband, to my parents, to society, and if I could eat back my freshly cut uterus you bet your ass I would. To show that I can cut up parts of myself and swallow them back if I PLEASE.
And you can too. You can choose for this path for yourself today, tomorrow, in 10 years, I'll be right there and I'll tell you "oh, nice to meet you !" If you want to start over or "nice to see you again" if you want to just go on. We can celebrate, we also can just smile and keep living like nothing has changed, whatever floats your boat, because I know that sometimes I felt like partying on a new birthday, sometimes I just wanted to feel like every thing was still in the same place has before. As I was changing, it was reassuring to see the world stay the same around me, like a steady floor I could jump on without it crashing down under my feet.
We're living scary times. But when I hear about the trans elders who came out in the 70s (thanks MardiPants for her testimonies), and see how few of them survived to tell their tales, I feel like we have wayy more ways to protect each other now than before.
So let's do it, okay ? Let's protect each other. And when I say that, let me be super clear: let's protect EVERYONE. If someone falls, we stop, and we help. We don't run ahead and expect people to catch up. If someone falls, we stay with them, and when they're up and ready to go on, then we walk together. This is the only way we'll ever make consistent, long-lasting progress, not the false victories that only benefit the Chosen Ones(TM). These victories aren't victories.
Take care of yourselves and keep a close eye on your community. Lend a hand if you can, when you can. Even if it's just one time, it can make a big difference.
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chodzacaparodia · 11 months ago
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This is from My Hero Academia, but I'd bet it's totally something Kaiser would say to Isagi:
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When I read this I thought: "It's him. It's Kaiser."
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THIS DEFINITELY SOUNDS TOO SIMILAR
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jensthwa · 4 months ago
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show & tell pt. 2 (SMG x reader).
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part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.
SUMMARY:
After the… masterclass you gave Mingi the night before, you’re left anxious on what the future holds for you both. But there’s a pool party you promised you would attend and there’s not really time for you to figure your feelings out before your best friend shows up at your door to drive you to it. So maybe today is not the day to figure your feelings out, right? It’s just a pool party anyways, so nothing out of the ordinary is going to happen… right?
PAIRING: best friend!mingi x afab reader.
GENRE: childhood best friends (idiots) to lovers.
WORD COUNT: 11k.
WARNINGS: SMUT ☽ (MINORS DNI) anxiety attack, attempt !!! at comedy, wooyoung being a little shit part two ft jongho, a new oc being the voice of reason, reader is clueless and in denial i fear, jealousy, miscommunication, fighting so this part is just a tiny bit angsty :(, confessions, teasing, face sitting, hand job, car sex (don't do it in public people, it can get you arrested), pet names (love and baby), a plot line at the end none of you guys are going to get until my new wip drops but it's worth the wait!
NOTES: hey everyone! thank you so much for patiently waiting for this second and last part to drop. i think that, after this one, if you guys want to request any drabbles or if i come up with some scenarios for this couple i will post them but for now nothing is on the works. what is on the works is a wip that's part of the same universe as this one, so pay attention to the new characters i mention if you want any clues! this is 100% self indulgent, as all fics should be, and i think i've re-read it so many times that if you find a typo or something that just doesn't make sense, you can blame it on english not being my first language i guess lmao. i hope you enjoy it and if you do feel free to send to my askbox/reblog/type in any feedback or thoughts! <3
POSTED: july 28th 2024.
TAGLIST (sorry if i forgot anyone, pls let me know!): @vannerriin / @mingtinysworld / @purple-bell / @bakepotatoman / @nxy3h / @taehyungmami / @nxcxllxsevens / @breadpuddingboys / @hotteokkay
masterlist.
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When you wake the next morning, the consequences of restless sleep show up in your face as a reminder of what happened the night before. 
It's not that you regret it, it's more the fact that you feel so unapologetic about messing with the perfect dynamic you have with Mingi that caused you to toss and turn so much. 
Last night, after putting your duvet back on and then crashing into the mattress feeling all tingly and giddy, you asked yourself a thousand questions. 
The main one being: What the fuck did you do? 
The words kept repeating over and over in your head, your voice of reason (or your anxiety) screaming at you to get your phone and make it right before everything becomes a complicated, unresolvable mess. 
You had a brief moment of panic and heavy breathing, your chest tight with unspoken emotion and your eyes filled with tears. 
It was too much, so you forced yourself up and paced around for what felt like hours trying to get your feet back on the ground. Nothing was working, so you sat down at your desk and rested your forehead against it. 
When you didn't feel the usual coolness of the wood, a comfort sensation for when your studies got the best out of you for the day, and instead felt a pen almost stab you in the eye, you -very confused- leaned back. 
Mingi’s notebook and the pen he didn't put back on the pencil case seemed to stare back at you lovingly instead of mocking you for losing control over your own emotions. 
A sense of peace washed over you when you flipped the pages and landed on the instructions he wrote down. Memories of the amazing years you have had by his side started crossing your mind, like recomforting flashes that allowed your heartbeat to go back to normal: 
The first day you saw Mingi, chasing behind a worned out soccer ball and then kicking it so hard it landed on your lawn. 
The first time you two hugged, when your dad scolded you for having bad grades until you cried in front of him. 
The way he held your hand before heading inside to take the college admission exam, last year of highschool. 
His kind eyes. His reassuring smile. The way he made you feel just a few hours back. 
There's no getting rid of me either, love.
We'll figure it out. 
Letting a few contained tears run down your cheeks, you nodded to yourself as if he was there in the room with you. 
Yeah, you'll figure it out.  
And then proceeded to, very much, not figure shit out for the rest of the night. You could still feel his hands everywhere and hear his voice against your ear whispering how much he knows you and pays attention to you. 
You are fucked. 
It's all you can think about when you get ready for the day. It's all you can think about when you help your dad with lunch and when you let your parents know at the table that you are going out that same afternoon. 
“Mingi is driving you, right?” 
“Yeah…” you whisper in response, eyes focused on one specific spot at the table and mind a million years away from the conversation. 
“Good. He's such a good kid, Y/N, I'm glad he knows how to take care of you.” 
Choking on air when your brain finally catches up to her words, you look back up at your mother in shock “W-what?” 
“Yeah honey, what? Y/N can take care of herself,” your father chips in, unaware of your red cheeks or the honest expression of panic you're giving both of them “She's a big girl that carries around that, uh… What was it?— Ah, that pepper spray I gave her, right?” 
“R-right.” 
He lets out a satisfied see? at your answer, gives you a tiny smile and gets up from the table to take his finished plate over to the sink. 
Your mom stays behind, giving you a look you can't quite read before her usual calm expression washes it away. Only then, you can take a proper, very needed, calming breath. 
“I need to get ready. Thank you for the food.” 
“You made it, dear.” 
“I mean! For taking care of the, uh, plates,” you clumsily correct yourself right away, getting up from the table as well “Love you. Bye!” 
You don't miss the confused giggle on your way to your room and when you're behind closed doors, you finally take into consideration that you might be, in fact, overreacting.
Not much, you think, but just enough to give your feelings away. And it's truly a shame, because you were planning on concealing and bottle everything up until it, inevitably, blows up in your face. 
Maybe not the smartest option. 
If you bang your head against the wall with enough force maybe, just maybe it’ll help—
Someone's texting you. 
> gi: heeeeey > gi: just woke up lol > gi: had the best sleep ever tho > gi: how are you, love? 
Okay. So normal texting it is. Maybe your initial plan of just pretending nothing happened is, coincidentally, Mingi’s plan as well. 
So you type in it's literally almost one, ya lazy and let your thumb hover over the send button, eyebrows creased at a sudden realization. 
The casual texting annoys you. 
Sure, Mingi is used to keeping everything casual between him and the people he sleeps with, but you're not just anyone! You didn't sleep together, either! 
Oh, maybe that's why. 
But it ticks you off either way. 
Is he not feeling the same way you do? Did it mean something different for him than it did to you? What did it even mean to you in the first place?
Why, after all the panic you felt the night before, did you have any sort of expectation for today? 
It doesn't make any sense. 
You hit send. 
> gi: aaaaand?  > gi: god forbid a man gets a good night's rest after being thrown off a bed. 
Scoffing, your eyes roll before you can even control it and, to your demise, the giddiness returns. You respond with did you get hurt? awww and raise a hand to your blushed cheek before sending the message.
> gi: yeah wtf  > gi: my butt is all bruised.  > gi: kiss it better? 
Oh. 
Not casual texting. At. All. 
Or maybe it is? 
Ugh.
Blanking on everything Mingi has ever texted you before, you decide it's best to entertain yourself by getting all pretty to sit around the house party tonight and do nothing else instead of torturing your confused brain any longer. 
Using the help of an emoji to flip him off and, hopefully, gather yourself together enough to get ready, you shoot him another text rushing him to do the same because you don't want to be late. 
And he usually takes forever to get ready anyways.
Showering with very cold water, taking a good thirty minutes to decide whether to wear something comfy and fitting or sexy and fitting for the party do the job when it comes to taking your mind off him for, at least, the time being. 
Yunho was insistent the day before in that you didn't need to bring a bathing suit if you didn't want to, but you pack one anyways because you can sense Wooyoung's and Jongho’s intentions even if the youngest couldn't make it to your impromptu gathering yesterday. 
They know you hate when they get away with annoying you and throwing you into the nearest body of water -in this case, Yunho’s pool- in front of many people you don't know (therefore, you are not going to able to go insane mode on them) seems like the perfect opportunity to get away with it.
The last time they did it you weren't really able to scold them properly either, so they laughed and pointed at you until you threatened to kick their asses in a very dishonest but playful way. 
Mingi, of course, did nothing but laugh along with everyone else and then kiss your forehead as an apology later that day. 
That was last summer and since then both perpetrators have treated you to meals and buttered you up enough for you to forgive (as if you didn't do that the morning that followed the incident) but you never forget. 
Maybe you should. It would make the sight of Mingi parking outside your house easier, you think.
You're sure he's parking outside just to give your dad, who comes out to greet him with a hug, some peace of mind. He's very protective of you and he trusts Mingi even if he gives him a hard time everytime he sleeps over or takes you somewhere.  
Like now, you have a very clear view through your window of the sermon he's giving your best friend. You don't hear it but he's moving his hands in the air way too much for it not to be a clear step by step on what to do if you run into any trouble on the way to Yunho's. 
Mingi likes step by step and he's good at following instructions, so you don't think it's going to be an issue. 
God damnit, Y/N, get it together. 
Sighing, you pick up your bag, check your outfit once in front of the mirror, and rush downstairs and out of the door. 
“You do know how to change a tire, son?” 
Mingi is standing in front of your dad with his hands behind his back and a tight smile. 
“Yes sir, my dad taught me and then at the school they made sure I didn't forget about it.” 
“And make sure to—” 
“Could you let the guy breathe, dad?” 
They both turn to, your dad wears a mocking smile and you see Mingi’s tight one breaks into a genuine one a second later. A grateful one, even. 
He looks really good. Which is insane, considering that to you he looked like Chewbacca just yesterday morning. 
Crazy what a good orgasm can do to a person. Or maybe it's the first time you ever let yourself see him in this light. Either way, he's wearing light wash jeans and a fitted t-shirt that clings to him just right and it's going to drive you insane, you can just feel it. 
“I was just making sure that he—” 
“Knows what to do,” you nod “He knows what he's doing, dad. Stop giving him a hard time,” you give your dad a quick kiss on the cheek and then rush to the passenger seat, giving Mingi a glance so he can get in the car as well. 
“Alright. Love you, take care!” 
“Love you too, Mr. L/N!” Mingi says, getting into his seat and giving your dad the opportunity to see when he fastens his seatbelt. He doesn't say anything else, even though he didn't tell Mingi specifically that he loved him and instead gives you both a nod of approval. 
When Mingi finally drives off your street and into the main one, you sigh in relief. 
“He's neeever going to trust me, huh?” 
“He trusts you,” you say right away, cheek resting against the seat so you can take a proper look at him “I'm his only daughter and you're a man after all. Cut him some slack.” 
“He never cuts me some slack!” he fights back but you just laugh and he can't help but join you “You look really good, by the way. A dress? Are you trying to impress someone?” The tone he uses sparks the remaining tension from the night before, like zero time has passed since he kissed you goodnight by your front door. 
When you got into the car with Mingi, you didn't consider that you two would be alone for, at least, forty minutes before getting to your destination. Your mind skipped the fact that he has this new ability to fluster you by just existing near you and you curse it for not letting you prepare well enough for the way he's looking at you right now. 
“Obviously,” you answer in a whisper, clearing your throat a second later “Wooyoung needs to be distracted so he doesn't tackle me into the pool the second we get there. Don't know if it's gonna work on Jongho, though.” 
Mingi clicks his tongue, baring his teeth and pretending to really think about it “I don't think so, love. You'll have to bribe him into considering dropping their whole summer schtick for you.” 
“You can help me with that.” 
“Can I now?” 
“Yeah. You can just… lock him up in a room and my dress can do the rest of the work.” 
Your best friend laughs and then takes a hand off the steering wheel to roll the hem of your dress in between his thumb and index. His knuckles brush against your thigh and you almost -almost- make a noise at the sensation. 
“It's not the dress, love… It's who's wearing it.” 
A bit of silence passes within the both of you. 
“Shut the fuck up, Song Mingi.” 
Laughter fills the car and drowns out the honking on the other side of the street and you wonder why you were worried in the first place. 
Nothing has changed. 
Aside from the intention laced with the flirting, it feels the same way it ever did and you couldn't be more glad because now that you know Mingi doesn't hate you (like you thought for a brief moment last night) or wants to hard launch a relationship that doesn't exist to your friends the second he gets them all together in the same room, you can enjoy the car ride and the evening that's about to follow it.
So you flirt with him freely, listen and sing along to songs that just feel like summer summarized in three minutes of exquisite writing and roll your window down once Mingi takes a turn into an hill, trees replacing the buildings you're so used to seeing. 
Your friend is rich rich. His family makes good money and his parents go on lots of business trips. That being said, it's the first time you actually attend one of his parties, and so when you get to Yunho’s house and ring the doorbell, you’re caught by surprise because you can already hear the loud music playing in the backyard and the blend of new and familiar voices through the thick door. 
You expect him to open the door for you but Seonghwa’s smile is the first thing you see before you and Mingi both have the opportunity to step in. 
“You made it!” 
“It's pretty hard to miss this house, Hwa.” 
Your older friend side-hugs you and stays by your side while Mingi takes it upon himself to put your bags for the day in the pile of other bags next to the door “How are you doing today?” 
You're about to answer but when you look at him, you see him staring at Mingi, so you do too. He's staring at Hwa with a little smile “I'm doing good. I blocked her and everything and I can confidently say that…” he turns to you “My ego’s not bruised anymore.” 
If Seonghwa caughts the spark between you and you best friend, he decides to ignore it “That's goo—” 
“Mingi!” 
What the hell is she doing here? 
Not, not that bitch from yesterday but this girl who Mingi meets with sometimes. You don't really know her, you just know she's gorgeous and that her name starts with an h, maybe? 
She's a fashion major and it shows in the way she's dressed up today. Truly, an enjoyable company whenever she's around at frat parties, a saving grace when you're tired of surrounding yourself with only men. 
Right now? She's your worst nightmare. 
Wrapping her arms around Mingi’s neck and getting on her tippy toes to kiss his cheek, she smiles like she knows she's getting laid tonight and your best friend does nothing to pull her away. 
She doesn't even say hi to you before dragging him to the backyard! You and Seonghwa follow them and when she takes Mingi’s arm and pulls him over to -you assume- introduce him to her friends, you almost stomp your feet like a little kid. 
Trying to get rid of the annoyed frown on your face, you turn to Hwa with a teasing smile and your eyebrows raised. 
“Well fuck me, am I right?” 
“I might!” Arms wrap around your waist and you feel Woo’s chin resting on you shoulder immediately after “That's a very nice dress, Y/N.” 
If Mingi was next to you, like you want him to be, you would give him a I told you so glance. Instead, you just look at Seonghwa with absolute horror before he snickers and goes away. 
“Right? And it looks horrible when it's drenched in nasty chlorine water.” 
“You can't possibly know that.” 
“I know a lot of things and— No! Woo, please don't,” you beg when he lifts you off the ground for a second. Behind you, you hear laughs and, even though you can't see them, you know it's San and Jongho “I just got here and I haven't even changed yet, please.” 
He turns you around and hugs you properly this time before letting you go. You take the opportunity to punch him in the arm and then go over to San and Jongho to do the same. 
“We'll let you get your swimsuit on this time.” 
“You're so considerate, Jong. Seriously, they're going to give you the Nobel prize if you don't stop.” He mocks you, repeating what you just said in a higher pitched voice and you laugh as you sit next to Wooyoung’s ex-girlfriend, Gyuri. 
San also has a girl sitting beside him with his arm around her, but you don't really know her so you just wave at her. They're all in their bathing suits already “See how he tried to flirt with me to try to get me with my guard down? He's a monster.” 
“And in front of me, too? The nerve on this guy.” Gyuri, of course, backs you up immediately and you want to return her smile, but you can see Mingi from the corner of your eye and it's distracting. 
“Oh, they're ganging up on me already,” Wooyoung whines, sitting down in front of you both and handing you a drink “It's like my worst nightmare.” 
“He's enjoying it, don't let him convince you otherwise,” San says, getting up from his seat and taking his girl with him “Especially coming from you.” He points at Gyuri and you laugh. 
“We're just friends now!” 
“That's what you told me like three years ago before—” 
Wooyoung gets up to chase after him and San lets go of the girl's hand to try to get away from him. 
Turns out, you're not the one Woo tackles into the pool. This time, him and San crash down on the water hard and a few droplets of water wet your feet. Gyuri laughs and everyone else does too when they realize what's happening. 
Jongho gets up and joins them in the water soon after to try and help (kinda, not really) San escape the wrath of his best friend. 
You almost miss it, because you take the opportunity to look at your best friend and, when you do, he's already looking at you. 
Breath catches on your throat and the lump that forms afterwards has a name and a reason: Mingi is looking at you with so much longing it physically hurts. 
He looks like wants to drop everything and come and confuse your fragile mind even more, just like he did the night before. 
Then why the fuck is he there with whatever her name is and her friends and not sitting right next to you? 
You look away, grasping your drink for emotional support and convincing yourself you're starting to see things that are not actually there. 
“Why the fuck are y'all fighting this time?!” Yunho comes from inside the house and it's the first time you see him today “No choking! No running! It's literally in the rules!” 
“Wooyoung please let go of my boyfriend!” 
Ah. So she is San’s girlfriend. Still, you turn to Gyuri to ask. 
“Who is sh—” 
“San’s new girlfriend, Kyungmi. We don't give a fuck about her or San right now, we're mad at them,” you want to ask who we is, because Wooyoung seems like he's just playing, but she interrupts you again “What the fuck is going on with you and Mingi?” 
Huh?! 
You make a quick mental review of your plan. Conceal? Clearly it didn't work. Bury your emotions deep so no one notices? You probably can't recover from the way you smile just dropped. 
The only thing left on the list is pretend that you're insane, but you're not sure it'll work either. So you turn it on her: “Nothing much. He played Espresso like three times on a row on the way here and I almost kill him, but—” 
“You can't bullshit me, Y/N.” 
Great, that didn't work either. 
“I saw that. Seonghwa did too but he got up before I could convince him to ambush you,” she dramatically sighs, chugging the rest of her drink down “So, what is going on?” 
“Nothing,” that much is true “he's literally with a girl right now.” 
“And she will never mean as much to him as you do. Next.” 
“Gyuri… I really don't know what you want me to say.” 
Squinting her eyes at you suspiciously, Gyuri takes her time before answering and you fidget in your seat a little. Wooyoung liked her for a reason, she's feisty and goes straight to the point and it's something you usually admire but right now it's not the time for her to do this. 
“I just thought maybe it finally happened…” She whispers and shrugs the entire conversation off before getting up “Let's head inside. They're going to start grilling meat at any second and I also don't want to be near Wooyoung when he gets out of there.” She points at him and you laugh. 
Jongho has him in a chokehold and Yunho is trying to separate them while San desperately swims towards his girl that's still waiting for him near the edge of the pool. 
“Sure thing.” 
You pretend you don't feel Mingi's eyes on you as you move. 
This is not unusual. Whenever you all go to parties, hosted by someone inside of the friend group or not, you end up separating from Mingi. 
He does his thing. He's outgoing and he likes dancing while you enjoy conversation and drinking away at the rest of the party, occasionally making out with someone and calling it a night when your social battery runs out. 
So you hang out with Gyuri in the kitchen until the sun starts going down and when the last ray of it disappears you decide it's time to swim a bit before you're too tipsy for it to be safe. 
Grabbing your bag and greeting some new people you don't know at the door, you head up to the bathroom you are told by the host himself it's upstairs. 
When your tying up the strands of your swimsuit, the door slams open and you jump and cover yourself up with your hands because you're not able to finish the job, so the strands fall down and the only thing holding the top part of the fabric it's you. 
“What the fuck, Mingi?” 
Turning around, you're only able to look at him through the mirror. 
“Lock the door next time! What if it was somebody else?” 
“People usually knock!” 
“I didn't mean to scare you, it's the door’s fault,” he makes a fool of himself trying to prove it “See? I— let me help you with that,” he closes the door again and, this time, he locks it before taking a short step and grabbing the strands of your top “It's the second time this week I scare you like that, huh? I’m sorry, love.” He ties the strands together with a secure knot and his apology finally allows your tense muscles to relax. 
You remind yourself that there's no valid reason for you to be mad at him. You'll figure it out, he said it himself, and maybe today is not the day to do so. 
But he's not stepping away once he's finished, he's not even saying anything else before his hands grab your waist and his chest collides to your back. 
Looking at him through the mirror again, you silently ask him with your eyes what he thinks he's doing. He ignores you, bending down so the tip of his nose can trace the skin on the side of your neck. 
“I missed you,” his voice sounds like honey when he says it and you, once again, curse the ability he has to make you crumble “and you disappeared like an hour ago.” 
You let out a sigh. 
“I was in the kitchen, Mingi, not missing and we were in the same space for at least twenty minutes before that and like… forty minutes in a car, together.” You remind him and he frowns “Besides, you were with Ha… Haneul?” 
“Hanni,” he corrects and you huff out a whatever “and she was introducing me to some of her friends that are in the same major as me, just a year over.” 
“Cool.” 
He pecks your shoulder. You do your best to not melt completely into him and fix your hair in the mirror. 
“Y/N…” he starts and you hum in acknowledgement “I missed you.” 
It pisses you off for some reason. The mature thing to do is to let him know but the words that leave you are petty and laced with annoyance. 
“I’m sure you did, buddy.” 
He grins against your skin and you turn around to face him, eyebrow raising. 
“What's so amusing?” 
At your tone, he seems taken aback but his smile stays curving his lips upwards.
“I'm just really happy to have this moment with you,” he says, matter of factly, and you press your hands against his chest to regain some personal space. He doesn't budge an inch “What's going on?” 
He's such a guy sometimes. 
“You're here, kissing my neck, while a gorgeous girl who I'm sure is waiting for you downstairs is probably bragging to her friends about how she's going home with you tonight and—” 
“Y/N, I'm literally taking you home.” 
“I can easily take a car back— Mingi, seriously,” taking a deep breath, you stare at him with all the honesty you can gather “I don't want to do whatever this is if afterwards you're going downstairs to dance and flirt with Haneul or whatever her name is.” 
He looks like he wants to correct you on it again, so you level him with a daring glance. 
He keeps his mouth shut. 
“And I also don't want you to hurt her feelings if you tell her you can't leave with her tonight, so—” 
“I don't give a shit about her feelings, love.” 
“Mingi, don't say that!” 
“I don't! I wasn't flirting with her at all, either! Listen, it's…” he stops to chuckle for a few seconds “I mean, it's adorable that you're jealous but there's no reason for you to—” 
“Shut the fuck up, Song Mingi.” 
It's the second time today you have said those exact words to him. The first time, you also felt your heart bang with such force against your rib cage but for a completely different reason. 
“I'm not one of the girls you fuck on the side when you're horny or bored out of your mind. Don't fucking treat me like one.” You warn and suddenly the image of you telling him that teaching him yesterday could mess you both up crosses your mind.  
“I'm not, Y/N! I'm just saying that you look adorable when you're—” 
“Jealous? Why would I be jealous when we are not together, Mingi? I'm literally looking out for the girl!” 
“You don't even know her name, love.” 
“That's not the fucking point!” 
He finally takes a step away from you, closing his eyes and taking a calming breath, surely.
Now you're pissed off because he saw right through you and your words. 
That disgusting weight on your chest you felt back by the pool while you kept staring at him from the corner of your eye? Jealousy. 
Now that he brought it up, it makes sense. 
You hate it. 
You always hated being put in a position where you felt the need to compare yourself to others. Always hated how easy it is for anger to run through your blood and infiltrate every waking thought until it clouds your judgment. 
Because you shouldn't be angry. He just said he didn't care about her feelings. 
And yet, all you can think about is that he spent an hour with her instead of you. 
When he turns to you, there's a storm in his eyes and you just don't want to hear it tonight. 
“Save it, keep it, sleep on it and we'll talk tomorrow,” picking your dress from the spot on the floor it's been sitting all this time, you put the fabric on, take your bag and then unlock the door “I’m going home.” 
You don't give him the opportunity to say anything else before getting out of the bathroom but you do hear a groan when you're rushing downstairs. 
Yeosang and Yunho are just leaving the kitchen when you trip on the last step and the host jogs the few steps to you after laughing. 
“There you are, Y/N. Listen, there's some meat already grilled back there but we're—” 
“I'm actually going home, Yun,” you cut him short “I'm not feeling that well. My plan was to swim a little before leaving but I don't think I can do it.” 
“Did something happen or…?” 
What happened is coming downstairs as he asks. 
“Nope. Nothing, I just think I'm catching a cold or something. Thank you so much for inviting me though!” You hug your friend quickly, kissing his cheek before pulling away. 
“Always…” Yunho is very observant but, as you always do, he doesn't press you with questions about what's going on “He's taking you home?” Pointing behind you, you don't have to turn around to get what he means. 
“Ye—” 
“No. He's having a great time here, I don't want to get in the way,” you shrug “I'll just get an uber or something. Don't worry.” 
Yunho frowns slightly, eyes moving from your face to over your shoulder. 
Immature. Petty. Rude. 
You're sure that's the way you’re coming off right now. But feeling anger bubbling behind the smile you give Yunho, you think it's better they make their assumptions instead of actually seeing you upset. 
You move to hug Yeosang as well and he murmurs his farewell. When you turn around, Mingi is no longer there and you don’t spare a look towards the floor to ceiling glass windows that separate the living area from the backyard because you're sure he's sitting right beside that girl again. 
As he should be. 
You bolt for the door, giving your friends a tiny smile before going down the few steps and into the hill. It's already dark and you're sure no uber driver it's going up this hill for the tip you're able to offer them, so you figure your best shot is to go down and try to find a cab on the main street. 
The light from your phone illuminates your scowl as you walk. Past the bushes and the trees and the lines of parallel parked cars where Mingi’s Lexus is. 
You don't notice him there until he opens the backdoor to block your step. 
“Get in the car, I'm taking you home.” 
Closing the door he just opened to stop you, you shake your head. 
“I told you I'm getting a ride and—”
“I don't give a fuck. Get in the car.” And then he's opening his door and closing it so fast it gives you no room for debating. 
He's angry. Shit. 
You can't even see him through the tinted window to assess how much damage you have done, so you look down the hill one more time and wonder if making the run for it is worth it. 
When your phone lights up with a notification from Gyuri asking you if everything's okay and to make it home safe, you take it as a sign to round the car and get into the passenger side with an annoyed huff. 
The engine comes to life. You're not looking at him but at the trees until the leaves start showing the building lights in-between them and soon you're on the main road. 
You can't even ask him to turn the radio on. Stubborn, you refuse to let the anger inside of you dissipate in fear of shame taking over. It's better being angry than being ashamed, at least in this exact moment because you can practically feel Mingi's anger through the silent treatment. 
But you need to say something. The silence is suffocating and the street is surprisingly empty so you can't distract yourself with anything. 
“You shouldn't have bothered.” 
“I am bothered. You bothered me.” 
Clenching your jaw, you turn to him in disbelief “I told you to stay at the goddamn party so we can fix this tomorrow but I bothered you?”
“Did I stutter or something?” 
“No, you're just not making any fucking sense!” 
“Yeah, fuck this,” you see him look around, biting the inside of his cheek like he's holding his words in “We're fixing this right now.” 
The car makes a harsh turn and you have to grab the door for support. 
“Mingi!” He's not listening to you anymore. His hard gaze stays on the road, it feels like forever before he pulls into a somewhat empty parking lot and when the vehicle stops you go to open the door and get the fuck away from him before you two kill eachother inside this car. 
That's an exaggeration but with the way he turns off the car and unbuckles his seatbelt, you know your pride doesn't stand a chance. 
The summer breeze briefly hits your face before his hand is on yours, closing the door and preventing you from, once again, escaping the situation. 
Frustrated, you let out a loud groan “What the fuck is your problem?!” 
“I don't know, Y/N! But I'll tell you what your problem is, alright?” he chuckles. It's a humorless sound, his face painted in something you've never seen before “Your problem is that you assume you know what everyone else is feeling and you assume you're right. But intuition can only get you so far, love, so I need you to take your head out of your ass and think logically for a second.” 
Flabbergasted, you think you murmur something in your defense but he cuts you short. 
“No! You didn't let me get a word out back there so now you're going to shut up and listen,” he pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes “You assume you're smarter than everyone else but you're actually so dumb. Dumb, you're acting very dumb and reckless, Y/N! That back there?” he points out of the window to nothing but you know what he means “Leaving— Scratch that. Leaving me and not giving me a chance to say anything back? Trying to go down that hill alone and in the dark? Stupid.” 
Staring back at him with watery eyes, you don't even know what to say back except a whispered excuse me?
“And usually I would beat up anyone who even dares to call you that but I guess all these years I've been wrong about you. Because if you were smart, you would've realized that Hanni means nothing to me and I mean nothing to her. There's nothing, she loves appearances and that's it.” 
You knew that already, but you're not giving your stance up. 
What even is your stance? Ah, right, he treated you like an envious no one back there and not like his best friend.  
“Yeah, I can tell you mean nothing to her from the whiny tone and the hug and the dragging you to meet her friends, Mingi.” Scoffing at the memory, your lips press into a thin line. 
“Well, she's a friendly girl!” 
“She didn't even say hi to me!” 
“So she doesn't like you, Y/N! Who cares!” you sure don't but, again, you just stare at him in disbelief and his open arms, palms to the sky “Do you care? Because I don't! And guess what? I doesn't fucking matter if she likes you or not or if she wants me or not because I like you!” 
What? 
“W-what?” 
“I like you! And I'll choose you over her and everyone else again and again and again until you notice but fuck it's so tiring. You're so fixated on why I let her drag me to her friends that you completely ignored me the rest of the time we were there and maybe if you looked at me more than once you would've realized that I was staring back at you the whole afternoon!” 
You let out an annoyed chuckle “So you were, Mingi.” 
“I was! I was trying to get you to look at me and notice how bad I wanted you to come over, rescue me from that boring ass conversation, grab my hand and claim your place right beside me because—” he pauses, resting a hand on the steering wheel and looking at you like he can't believe he has to spell this out for you “Because I want nothing more than for her and everyone to know I’m yours! I'm sure everyone already fucking knows too, except you. So yeah, sometimes, you're pretty fucking dumb for such a smart woman, Y/N.” 
Words escape you. They escape your mind, your reason and your pride shrinks until it disappears behind all the love you feel for Mingi. 
So that's what you are feeling. That's what you felt yesterday night when the tiredness couldn't drown out your thoughts of him and all he meant to you. 
Love, love, love. In all its forms, in all its possible scenarios. Your heart burns for it and you used to think that your hopeless romantic desires began and died with the movies you tend to see and the books you tend to read, that it was impossible to feel this way for anyone but there he is, chest heaving in the yellow interior light, waiting for you to say something back. 
“And I realize that before yesterday I showed no interest in you but believe me when I say that I—” 
Shakily, you interrupt him with whispered words, heart soaring and hands reaching out to cup his beautiful face “Shut the fuck up, Song Mingi.” 
When you kiss him, you make sure to pour out everything you couldn't say a minute ago into it. 
When he kisses you back with the same feeling, it crosses your mind that he already forgave you. 
And when he grabs your waist and drags you over the break handle and the transmission to collide his chest against yours and drag his tongue along the seam of your bottom lip, you think that, for the first time ever, you have to tell him he's right. 
You are stupid. Stupid for not realizing it sooner, stupid for confusing his longing stares for something platonic, stupid for thinking you could wait until tomorrow to tell him he has the right to see and be with anyone he wants to because this is it. 
This. The way your entire body comes alive when he sighs into your mouth and groans at the way your knee opens up his legs to make room for you on his side of the car and partially on his lap. The way his thumbs run through your cheeks and dry the tears you didn't even feel falling down. The way your heart jumps frantically and the way its beats could get confused by his because you're so close. 
Suddenly and unexpectedly, you can't recall a time Mingi didn't make you feel this exact same way. It's overwhelming, it expands through you like a fire and it knocks the remaining air out of your lungs enough for you to pull away and rest your forehead against his, shaky breaths tangling together and fingers grasping the neck of his shirt in an attempt to ground yourself. 
You sniffle, incapable of not feeling emotional over his confession and your realization “I'm sorry, Mingi. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for treating you that way I was… I behaved like…” 
“An ass.” He nods and you look at him with the ghost of a smile tugging at your lips. 
“Yeah,” you nod as well “I was an ass. A jealous ass.” 
“I know, love.” He whispers, eyes moving on your face before his lips are on yours again, briefly, sweetly, even if you don't feel like you deserve it “You tend to forget that I know you, hm? That I've seen you jealous before? You were an ass back then, too.” 
“Okay! Okay, stop calling me an ass, I get it.” 
“I'm sorry for waiting for you to do something when you didn't even… I guess you didn't know, right? The way I feel about you?” 
“I know now,” you whisper back, nudging your nose against his and then putting some distance so you can see him better “I feel the same way, by the way. We're shit at communicating, apparently, so I'll just tell you now that—” 
His lips are on yours again and he's giggling against them and shaking his head when he pulls away. Brown eyes search for yours and you're not sure what he's looking in them but he seems to find it, his muscles relaxing against the leather of his seat seconds later. 
So you kiss him again. And again and again until your back starts hurting and the steering wheel is pressed uncomfortably against it, forcing you to shift on his hold. 
“Let me… Wait.” He lets you go to pull his seat back and then closes his legs, forcing your knee to fall on his other side so you can fully straddle his lap “That's better. Now come here.” And then he’s grabbing the back of your neck and stealing your breath away again with another kiss.
The tension shifts right then. When he can fully feel you pressing up against him and when a noise escapes you once his hands drop and give your bare legs the attention you didn't even know you were craving. 
You thought a second ago that the sweet kisses would stop once you were both sated with the sweet aftermath of all the yelling and confessing but now you don't want it to stop. 
There's a lot to catch up on, a lot of missed time you need to make up for. 
You still want to make him feel good. The sparks from yesterday come alive again and soon you're yanking the strands of dark hair with your fingers and letting your mouth explore the skin of his neck. When you sink your teeth into his skin, he lets out the same noise he did the night before and you smile against the mark you just made. 
His lips find your shoulder and he breathes hard into it once your hips start moving at their own accord, slowly yet firmly, the pad of his fingers digging hard on your thighs until you break away from his neck to focus on his face again. 
“This goddamn dress, love.” 
Humming, you caress his red cheek with your lips “What about it?” 
“Been thinking about it all day…” 
“It worked, by the way.” 
“Woo?” 
“Mhm. Distracted him so he didn't throw me in the pool right away.” 
“And Jongho?” 
“Probably plotting against me right now.” 
He laughs softly into your skin “Probably.” 
Chuckling as well, you stop your movements and take in how he looks. Gone, a little too fucked up from just making out, lips swollen and eyes clouded with something you're getting too familiar with, too quick. 
“Worked on you, too.” 
He smiles and shrugs, letting his head drop into the headrest “You look good in everything, love. It doesn't really matter what you wear.” 
“Oh?” 
A firm hand trails up your body, slowly, from you leg to your hip, your waist to the side of your breasts and your until it cops your face with affection you never imagined you would experience. 
“I have always thought you are the most beautiful girl to ever exist.” 
This is it. 
Leaning into his touch, your lips connect to the palm of the hand holding you before you lean forward again. 
“I love you, Mingi.” 
He doesn't seem surprised by your confession and you're glad he knows. It doesn't really matter if its too soon, if you even mean it in a romantic way or not, the love you have for him transcends all labels. 
“I love you too, Y/N.”
And his does too. 
You kiss him until it hurts. 
He kisses you until you're gasping and your body is pleading for more. 
The both of you kiss each other until you're sure nothing else will replace the taste of one another, that it will linger forever even if your paths stop crossing at any point in time. 
It feels like you're trapped somewhere where the clock doesn't tick at all, where you can take your time exploring him with your mouth and your hands. 
And then it doesn't. 
The fabric of the dress starts bothering you, his tight shirt is suddenly not tight enough and the hardness steadily growing and pressing into your core is screaming for attention you can't give him with all these clothes on the way. 
He feels it too, fingers tracing the hem of your dress for the second time today and then they're under it, pulling at the fabric up until it bunches on your waist. 
You're still wearing the swimsuit he helped you put on earlier but it does little to conceal how affected you are. Looking down, you're not even ashamed of it when he follows your eyes and let his linger on the patch of wetness darkening the color of the bottoms. 
Still, he moves his hands upwards again and soon you're struggling to get the dress off, considering you're almost bumping the roof of the car when you straighten your spine to do so. 
“Wanna know what crossed my mind when I saw you in the bathroom?” 
When it's finally off, he immediately goes for it: His index tracing your collarbone and slowly descending, his short nail dragging against your skin before the rest of his fingers join, right in between your breasts, where there's fabric holding together the top of the swimsuit. 
He could easily tug on it if he wanted to. Instead, he ignores it and presses the heel of his hand against it, forcing you to lean back and almost bump into the steering wheel again. 
Unable to speak and panting, you only nod as a reply to his question. 
“How easy it would be to get on my knees and eat you out. I thought: What if I just…” Using his other hand to mess with the knots that keep the left bottom part of the swimsuit together, he demonstrates what he means without actually doing it, his eyes following the motions “Undo these, get on my knees and make her come all over my face?” 
“Fuck, Mingi…” 
“You would like that, wouldn't you?” He smirks without actually looking at you, the hand on your sternum traveling down against your skin before joining the other one, teasing the knots on the right. 
“Y-yes.” 
Maybe he can see it on your face, the sudden nervousness at the scene he painted before you, because he grabs one of your hands and brings them to his lips before drawing you close again “Please tell me your idiot ex-boyfriend ate you out when you were together.” 
Blush darkening, you make a face that gives the answer away. 
He groans “He's worse than I thought, fuck. Come here.” And without any warning, the back of his seat goes down until it touches the backseat with it.
Bracing yourself against his chest, because you went down with him as well, you huff out a surprised laugh “Go where?” 
“Up here. Let me teach you something tonight.” 
“Mingi…” 
“First, you need to make sure your hands are clean—” 
“Stop,” laughing, you interrupt his bad attempt at teasing you with the same words you used on him yesterday “There's no real support for me if we do this, where do I even—” 
“Knees here,” he motions the backseat and you could actually do it, but you would have to sit on his face instead of hovering like you imagine it would be more comfortable for him “hands here” he points to the grab handle and the headrest of the passenger seat and then straightens his spine a little, bringing his face closer to you so he can whisper right into your worn out lips “Turn the light off, I'll do the rest.” 
He looks like he's going to kiss you but then he falls back onto the seat with an excited smile curving his lips. 
What a tease. 
So of course you turn off the light and prop yourself up into the position he wants to. It's challenging, the car is not that small but it feels like it is and you very much would rather do this on a bed, spare his back and yours in the process, but excitement also runs through your body and your brain stops making up excuses for why should deny yourself of the pleasure of Mingi using his mouth to make you see stars the second his fingers undo the knots and peel the bottom half of your swimsuit off your body with ease. 
Lips trailing up your inner thighs and hands on each side of them, holding you in a secure position, Mingi doesn't tease you much before attaching his mouth to your heat and your subconsciousness flies out the window when his tongue flicks your clit. 
You look down at him and the sight of him enjoying himself has you beaming, the warmth spreads through you and the zeroes on your pussy. You don't even try to quiet down your moans, completely forgetting that you're in a public parking lot that can fill up at any second. 
But paying no mind to it either, Mingi also moans encouragingly into your wet folds when your hips move a little, chasing that high. 
He shifts his focus to your entrance, his tongue working itself into you and when you move your hips again at the feeling, his nose bumps into your clit in a way that has you grasping the headrest for support, right hand slipping down and resting on the window while your mouth hangs open and your eyes shut close. 
“Mingi… Baby, fuck, I'll—” he adds his thumb into his ministrations, pressing it against your clit the way he did yesterday and it only takes a few side to side movements for you to come undone on his mouth. 
And again, the intensity of your orgasm takes you by surprise. It's obviously not as intense as yesterday's but it still got you trembling so you want to curse him out for being that good at what he does. 
He eases you into it, slowing his mouth and you only register that it leaves you completely when your thighs are being kissed tenderly. 
Breathless, you look down at him and catch his smile before his teeth are sinking into your skin and forcing you to hiss out a laugh “Good?” 
“Yeah,” you smile, climbing down from your position and hovering over his lap in an attempt to not ruin his jeans. It's very obvious he enjoyed it too, his crotch holding the evidence tight and probably painfully against the fabric there “Really, really good.” 
You want to get on your knees and return the favor, make him squirm in pleasure, but the space is not working in your favor. So even though your thighs are hurting and sweat is dripping down your neck, you start working on the button and zipper of his jeans before he sits up.
He wants to say something, but your tongue is touching his and tasting yourself on it before he gets the chance. Clumsily, a little too far gone for your liking as well, you are able to get through the layers of clothes and let your hand hang over his dick “Are you gonna make me beg for it today?” 
“You don't have to, love.” 
“Beg?” you ask with a smile that he reciprocates “Or touch you?” your free hand brushes the hair out of his face, sliding down until you're propping his chin up with it, thumb tracing his bottom lip softly “Because I want to touch you. I want to make you feel so, so good, baby. Please.” 
He kisses the pad of your thumb and then takes it into his mouth, tongue caressing the tip of it until you're panting again and then nods. 
That's all the permission you need before taking him with your hand and pulling him out of his boxers. Taking your hand out briefly, you gather up saliva and spit right into it. 
Mingi lets out a noise at that. Interesting. 
Starting slow, you focus on his expression. Testing the waters, taking note of what he likes because, unlike him, you probably pushed to the corner of your mind every sexual conversation you two had before yesterday. You take a second to look down at it, the size is no surprise but your mouth waters at the image of you taking him into the heat of it. 
Maybe another time. For now, you focus on making him feel good with the little you can offer him in the enclosed space of his car. 
He mouths at your neck, choked up sobs vibrate through the skin on your collarbone and your top gets moved to the side so he can mark the side of your boobs as he pleases. It sets the fire inside of you alive again, your folds getting wetter when he rolls his tongue around your nipple and then throws his head back when you twist your hand in a motion he seems to really enjoy.
“Just like that, love.” 
To your delight, he's not quiet. He's loud, he's grabby, taking the opportunity to hold onto your ass and press down on the skin when you tease his slit and gather his precum on your fingers so you can spread it around his cock and your hand can slide easier. 
Movements get sloppy once he's close, he's no longer paying attention to you and you welcome it as a great sign, his hips bucking into your hand and he moves you forward until you're sitting on his lap again. 
The only thing preventing your pussy and his dick to touch being your hand. 
You glance at him and he looks back, probably the same idea popping up into his mind so you nod once.
The car moves as you two move around, to the back seat, the spine of his seat up and the entire thing moving forward to make space for him next to you, over you, on top of you once he kicks his jeans and boxers off to the floor. 
You reach out to him in a silent plea and he bends down to kiss you soft and moist and hot and breathy, sensually, with sweet sounds escaping both of you when you reach under his shirt and lift it up until he gets what you want. Discarding it with the rest of his clothes, your top follows it and the contentment you feel when his naked chest touches yours is unmeasurable. 
There's no real room to move around and there's not really any patience left within both of you, so when he apologizes when he moves his hips where he shouldn't and his tip brushes your entrance, you pull back from his bruising mouth. 
“Condom. Now.” 
He obliges right away, searching on his jeans for a minute or so and when he comes back he's smirking like he can't believe you “When I told you we needed to raincheck I didn't mean it to be like this. Bossy.” 
Even if you're punching him on his chest and giggling at his breathy words, you take the teasing with pride “You started it, Mingi!” 
Putting the condom on skilled and fast, he's soon resting his forehead against yours and kissing you softly again “I wanted you on my bed…” his lips trail down and the giggles die on your throat as he's kissing it, a moan escaping you “On your back or knees or riding me…” he continues in a whisper going down and down and down, giving your nipples attention before going back up and taking your mouth in his again “Making a mess on my cock…” 
He takes the opportunity to enter you slowly and you gasp at the stretch, wet enough so it doesn't hurt you but you're unfamiliar with him, with his size splitting you open deliciously. 
“F-fuck, Y/N.” Mingi leans back to watch you take him in and you whine again. Tilting your head back, you let him work himself in and you moan loudly when he almost bottoms out “Look at you…” 
You don't. You can't. He's pressing his thumb on your clit again to ease you through the stretch and it makes the heat pool in your belly like you didn't come in his mouth a few minutes ago. 
Slowly but surely it gets easier for him to rock his hips into you, mouth parting in pleasure when you remind yourself to look at him. His abdomen tenses when you run your nails against the skin there, softly, until you're detouring them into his back and sinking them in just enough to have him whining at the feeling. 
“Baby… Harder.” 
“Yeah?” 
Hips bucking up to meet his at a particularly hard trust, you reach up to him so he can rest his body weight on yours. Close like this, with the pace picking up, the knot on your lower half tightens and threatens to break. 
“You take me so well, love. Fuck, always knew you would,” you know he can feel your walls tightening around him at the praise, because he smiles and kisses you once before continuing “My pretty, pretty girl… Taking my cock so well…” he punctuates his words with the roll of his hips and you cry out, holding his face in between your hands, his eyes never leaving yours. 
In this position, his lower abdomen bumps into your clit and it's soon tipping you over the edge. 
“So good, so good, oh— Oh, God.” You're mumbling incoherently while Mingi keeps whispering sweet nothings and then the tension on your belly breaks. It takes three seconds of your walls pulsating around him for him to groan loudly into your mouth and come undone as well. 
The only thing you can hear is breathing, all you can feel is breathing. His against your chin, yours blowing on his hair when you rest your cheek on his temple. 
It takes a second to gather yourself again and when you do, you tilt your head back to give him a chaste kiss that he returns. 
“That was so good, baby.” You tell him and he smiles, nodding in agreement “I am sticking to the fucking seat though.” 
Mingi snorts and just like that the energy shifts back to the usual you. Only this time, you come back to it knowing that no one’s ever going to have you the way he does. 
He slips out of you, doing his thing with the condom and you sit up, looking through the windows and becoming aware of your surroundings for the first time since you got there. 
There's a car parked far away from you that's empty and the rest of the cars that were near it have left. You wonder how long this all took, because you lost track of time the second he told you he likes you. 
Chest still heaving and boxers now on, Mingi rests his back on the door and takes your hand in his “Is it dumb of me to assume you're my girlfriend now, love?” 
“Is it dumb that I assumed that's what I was when you said you like me?” 
“No,” he answers right away “not dumb at all.” 
Smiling, you nod “Then I'm your girlfriend, Mingi.” 
He beams at that and then he's crowding you again “Say it again.” 
“I'm your girlfriend.” you repeat, enunciating each word and giggling when he nuzzles his nose into the crimson on your cheek “I’m yours, baby.” 
Resting his forehead against yours, he hums in contempt “Good, because I've always been yours too.” 
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“There's no way! You two... together? Guys… See, that would be me if I didn't saw it coming but I'm smarter and cooler than everyone here so I did.” 
Wooyoung's over the top reaction has Mingi throwing his head back in a silent laugh and you staring at the black haired guy, unamused and a little offended. 
It's two days later and, as usual, you're at Wooyoung's and San’s apartment hanging out. 
After putting your clothes back on and going for some well deserved food, Mingi took you home, kissed you goodnight and showed up the next day after class to break the news to your parents. 
Your mom almost cried. Your dad too, but for a completely different reason. 
In the end, they both agreed they saw it coming and when you told Mingi’s parents, they said the same thing and invited yours to have celebratory dinner without you. 
What happened in Mingi’s room after was worth missing dinner anyways. 
Mingi and you decided to break the news when most of the group showed up for movie night and you were nervous to see their reactions. 
But everyone seems unaffected by it. 
“I knew you guys liked each other the second I met you. Ask Gyuri, she agrees with me.” 
“Sadly, I do.” Wooyoung's ex looks at you from her spot by the door, where she's getting her shoes on. 
She winks at you and you fake a gasp, falling into your boyfriend's lap with an annoyed huff. 
“And no one told us?!” 
“Sorry, Y/N. We didn't want to get in the way.” Hwa is apologetic and Yeosang nods alongside Hongjoong but you gape at them like they betrayed your trust. 
“To be fair we didn't know till’ last week, love.” 
“She didn't know.” Gyuri corrects him and now you turn to her to give her the betrayed look “You were pining over it for six months already.” 
“I say it was more like nine but…” Hwa shrugs and sips his cup, giving the man holding you close a knowing smile. 
Oh, they definitely talked about it, huh? 
“Nine months and no one cared to fill me in, huh?” 
“I’m sure Mingi did—” 
“Wooyoung!” 
“Well I didn't notice.” Yunho interferes with a shrug and gives you a recomforting smile that doesn't work at all. 
San laughs “That's because you're a puppy that can't even tell when someone likes you.” 
“Am not!” 
Everyone, including you and Mingi, make a noise in agreement with San.  
“You're one to talk, though, leave the puppy alone.” Gyuri tells her ex's best friend and Wooyoung laughs at him when his smile drops. 
There's some story there you don't know. 
“Guys… Does someone like me right now? Be honest.” 
Yeosang is about to tell him something but Jongho interrupts. 
“Enough with the love talk! Can we start the movie?” But he's pressing play already, so the answer doesn't really matter. 
Gyuri laughs once and Wooyoung makes his way over to her to give her a hug that she enjoys for one second tops before pushing him away. 
“Enjoy everyone! I'm so happy for you two, by the way, not that these neanderthals would tell you to your face but I'm sure they're too.” 
“Thank you, Gyuri.” Mingi murmurs from behind you and you mouth a thank you as well before she leaves for the night. 
Something about her best friend having a boy crisis. 
You don't miss the way San’s eyes follow her until she leaves or the way he looks at Woo, something clearly worrying him. 
His best friend ignores him, though, so you confirm that might just be a little pissed off at him after all. 
“Tell her to text you what happens.” San asks Woo once she leaves and he rolls his eyes. 
“Mhm. I’ll tell her to stop calling us neanderthals too.” 
You smile “Well, she's right.” 
“Nuh-uh!” 
Jongho has to stop the movie and you see him sulk while everyone else is arguing. Some of them, like Hwa and Yeo, are siding with you and Gyuri. And the rest of them, like your boyfriend, are telling them off. 
When you turn to face him, his argument dies mid-sentence because he stops to smile at you. He takes your face in his hand and kisses you for the first time ever in front of everyone else. The group stops the argument to tease you both and you laugh into his mouth. 
A cushion is thrown at you and Jongho gets up to separate your faces before sitting beside you with a pout on his lips. 
“Can we watch the goddamn movie?!” 
You're the happiest you've ever been.
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If you read all the way down here: THANK YOU SO MUCH. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!
© jensthwa, 2024.
2K notes · View notes
gay-dorito-dust · 3 months ago
Note
Can you please do one where the reader is Stan and ford’s childhood friend? I’d imagine that they would both be SUPER protective, and later in adulthood they move in with does to help with his research. Stanley and ford secretly developed a crush on them over time but neither have admitted their feelings 🤭🤭
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I made this one too fucking long as well the to might need to make a part two as not to overwhelming people.
You probably threw sand in some bullies eyes when they didn’t leave poor Ford alone/ and or comforted Ford alongside Stan afterwards bc confrontation wasn’t your thing. Either way it didn’t take long for you, Stan and Ford to become a well known trio in the town of New Jersey, one was never seen without the other two trailing behind.
You three were inseparable.
Ford was the brains and intellect
Stan was the protective fighter
And you were the mediator, the confidant, the person who’d encourage the twins to keep moving forward for that was the only way to go.
The mystery trio you called yourselves as you’d spend countless hours on the beech, searching for the abnormal and mysterious with nothing but your flashlights and determination to make a name for yourselves.
You didn’t give a shit about Ford’s six fingers, you thought they were cool and told him often that you were jealous.
‘Why?’ He’d ask.
‘It’s cooler to be different than it is to fit in the norm.’ You’d tell him as you’d both sit somewhere overlooking the beach, hearing the cries of seagulls and the crashing of the waves against the sandy beaches. ‘One day everyone is going to try and find something abnormal about themselves to fit in, as though they weren’t the same people who’d shun people for being a little different. They’ll never admit that they’re the bad guy and all they want is attention and will throw a tantrum when they don’t get it.’
You then placed a hand on Ford’s shoulder and squeezed. ‘So don’t listen to them Stanford, you’ll make a name of yourself one day and they’ll all flock to you like moths to a flame. High six?’ You raised your hand.
‘High six.’ Ford replied as you high-fived/ high-sixed each other.
Their dad didn’t like you but you didn’t give a shit because you didn’t like him all that much either with how he treated Stanley in comparison to Ford and would often refuse to go to their house when you knew he was there.
Shermie pines however adored you for keeping her boys in line and being their friend and practically adopted you into the family as she would then move her attention to her sons.
‘So which one of you is going to fall for them first?’ She would ask as Stan and Ford look at her with flustered cheeks.
‘They’re just a friend!’
‘Yeah a friend!’ The twins defective words would overlap which didn’t help their matching blushes that looked like cherry tomatoes by now.
Shermie would then throw her arms over the boys’ shoulders and said. ‘That’s what they all say until it becomes harder to ignore what you truly feel for them. Now it might be platonic but what about later on in the future where you look at them and suddenly think about planning a future with them.’
Now at this point neither Ford nor Stan truly understand what they felt for you at the time, they only thought they were being your protective friends who’d glare at whoever from behind your back if they caught them looking at you weird. They thought they were looking out for you much like you did for them as they stood on either side of you like two towering towers.
After all they didn’t have that many friends besides each other form such a young and so having you in their corner made you all the more special to the brothers.
You and Stan would playfully rough house, doddle in the margins of a notebook or write in code that you’ve only just made up on the spot to one, another and just do dumb goofy stuff in your spare time.
You and Ford would read, come up with theories about the things in New Jersey to make them more interesting than they were, go on a ‘monster chase of the week’ type of adventures when you were bored and in need of thrills.
Stan and Ford were your boys and you would have their backs no matter what as they always had yours in return. Much how like you made Cathy’s life hell after she threw punch at Ford, thinking that standing in solidarity with him as you and Stan both threw punch at each other and making a right ass of yourselves in order to make Ford feel better.
You and Stan then tp’d the bitches house and probably caused property damage but if they couldn’t see the person who did it, then did it actually happened in the first place? (Stans logical explanation to why tp someone’s house in the dead of night was a great guise.)
Or the time you had gotten stood up on a date and Stan threatened the beat the little shit up while Ford - equally as upset at the coward who stood you up- was more focused on comforting you and reminding you of your self worth and how it should be dictated by you alone and not some temporary crush.
You thought that it would be you, Ford and Stanley against everyone, that you’d get to live with them until you were old and grey but life ultimately took you and Ford in different directions from Stanley, who at this point had resorted to conning people for a living after being kicked out of the house by his cunt of a father.
The rift between the brothers that you though wouldn’t split from another for more then five minutes was larger then you’d like to admit, and it broke your heart to see them stand across from one another rather then beside each other.
Your parents refused to take him in afterwards despite your begging and pleading that you’ll do better in school if they house Stanley for a while. Needless to say you were gutted about not having your friend in your life that you didn’t take to your parents for a good while.
You did fairly well in school and ended up in Backupsmore university with Ford, who found a new friend in fiddleford and spent countless days and nights in the library doing extensive studies on the abnormal and the mysterious. You and Ford didn’t have as much time for each other as you use to as kids, that and you couldn’t contact Stanley who was god knows where, god knows what and getting into a fuckton of trouble. You missed it when days were a hell of a lot more simpler but that’s not how life worked and you were being told this constantly.
Ford was excelling at everything while you were average at best and while Ford tried to help, he could tell your heart wasn’t in to listening what he had to say and he knew the reason why.
‘You miss Stan.’ He says one day when you came to his dorm for help.
‘And you don’t seem to miss him one bit.’ You replied as you doodled a cartoon version of yourself, Stan and Ford celebrating a well earned victory over some weird lake monster that had a comedically large bump on it head.
‘He ruined his own life y/n why can’t you accept that.’ He reminds you but it was obvious that you weren’t so willing to hear him out as you use to be. ‘I could’ve helped him Ford, I could’ve!’ You cried.
‘But he didn’t want your help, he was on the path of self destruction and he didn’t want you getting caught in the aftermath of it all.’ Ford said as he placed his hand on your shoulder, much like you did to him when you were younger. ‘Stan is stubborn but wouldn’t avoid you for no reason.’ Ford adds as you look at him.
‘And how would you know that?’ You asked, brow raised.
‘Because I wouldn’t avoid you for no reason either.’ Ford admitted and you swore your saw a blush cut across his face. This conversation never gets brought up again by Ford as no matter how often you reminded him of it, he’s try to change the subject to something else entirely with a nervous laugh and shifty eyes.
You knew something was up and hated being left in the dark but you knew Ford was equally as stubborn as his brother, whether that’s something he’d like to admit or not. However life moved on and so did you as soon you found yourself becoming Ford’s assistant and moving to Gravity Falls, a small town not on any map but had a reputation for being a little odd much like its residence.
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briefinquiries · 3 months ago
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Tyler Owens x Reader: You Look Like You Love Me
Request: "I wondered if you could do a Tyler Owens fic where it’s the end of the day and everyone’s exhausted from chasing all day and stuff. Readers just gotten out of the shower and is in her sleep dress, hair wet and decides to join all the storm chasers/ the team out by the bonfire so she throws one of Tyler’s flannels on, puts her boots on and goes to find Tyler and once she does there’s a slow song that comes on the speaker (I feel like they’d have music playing that the whole parking lot can hear) and it just ends with them slow dancing by the fire looking into each others eyes and talking about their future, JTyler just has this look on his face knowing he is going to marry this woman one day<3"
Word count: 2.4k
Warnings: none
A/N: thanks for the request, this was such a cute idea / fun plot to write :) Enjoy!! 
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“You comin’?” Tyler asked, giving your hand a slight squeeze and nodding towards the group of people already clustered around the fire. 
You offered a small smile, which was about all you were capable of after the long day you’d had. 
“I’m really tired,” you explained. “Think I’m just gonna grab a shower then crash.”
You didn’t miss the look of disappointment that flashed across his face. But it was quickly replaced by a gentle nod. “Course, let me just grab our stuff, then I’ll head up.”
“No, you stay,” you encouraged him, nodding towards the group. “This is right up your alley, don’t miss out because I’m a tired slug.”  
Tyler tipped his head to the side affectionately. “You’re about the cutest tired slug I think I’ve ever seen,” he said in a tone that was far too serious for the context. 
You shook your head, lips tugging into a grin as you pulled your hand away from his to adjust the bag slung over your shoulder. “Shut up,” you mumbled adoringly before nodding towards the fire. “Look, they have music goin’. Why don’t you go slow dance with Boone or something?” 
“Yeah alright,” Tyler agreed, taking a step backwards. His tongue poked through his teeth in the same way that, even after almost two years together, still made your stomach flip. “I’ll be up in a little while.”
“Have fun,” you called before he turned and began walking towards where everyone else had gathered. 
Meanwhile, you had the pleasure of trudging up a flight of stairs to get to the room Tyler had booked for the night. After nearly eight hours of driving that day, the muscles in your legs felt wobbly as you made the ascent. But when you finally were able to climb into the room’s shower– the warm water rinsing off all the dirt and sweat you’d acquired for the day, you sighed out a breath of relief. 
Although you appreciated how good it felt, you didn’t waste time in the shower. Instead, you quickly lathered up your hair, rinsed it out, and scrubbed yourself clean before grabbing a towel from the rack and drying off. Before long, you had your wet hair combed out, pajamas on, and were crawling into the queen bed positioned in the center of the room. You climbed in with full intentions of passing out without a second thought. 
However, to your absolute dismay, that wasn't the case. Instead, you tossed and turned, almost nodding off– but then reaching for someone that wasn't there yet. Eyes snapping open, you sighed defeatedly. It wasn’t uncommon for you to have a hard time sleeping without Tyler. But with how exhausted you felt, you’d been hopeful. 
You laid there for about half an hour before giving up. You were just growing increasingly frustrated and knew that no amount of laying there without him was going to work. 
So instead, you climbed out of bed, grabbed Tyler’s flannel, which laid conveniently at the top of your bag and threw your boots back on. Your hair was still damp when you left the room. Luckily the June air was warm– even after the sun had gone down. As you climbed back down the stairs, noise from the fire and people gathered filled your ears. You heard music coming through a nearby speaker and the collective murmuring and laughter from each conversation blurring together in a loud hum. 
As you approached the crowd, it didn’t take long before you spotted Tyler and the rest of the crew. He was sitting back in a camp chair, dimples on full display as he laughed at something Lilly was saying in the chair next to him. Boone was crouched on the sand, knees tucked into his chest while he used a stick to poke at the fire. Dani was kicked back in an adirondack chair, sipping casually on a beer. Meanwhile, Dexter was nowhere to be seen– presumably already gone to bed for the night. 
Wrapping his flannel tighter yourself, you began weaving your way through the crowd of people and towards him. Tyler spotted you after only a moment, like his eyes were born to find you in a crowd. At first his gaze was worried, eyebrows knitting together in a look of concern. 
“There she is!” Boone announced your arrival like your own personal cheerleader. 
You offered a smile and mumbled a weak hello before heading right for Tyler. 
“Hey baby,” he said. He moved like he was going to get up, but before he could, you walked to his side and plopped yourself down across his knees. Instantly, his hand found your waist while you wrapped your arms around his neck, nestling your face into the crook of his shoulder. 
“Everything okay?” he murmured, lips lingering along your hairline. He ran a hand up your back soothingly. 
You nodded, inhaling the scent of him. “Just couldn’t sleep.”
“Ah,” Tyler said, already knowing that what you really meant was, just couldn’t sleep without you. “We can head up, if you want. Let me grab my stuff.”
But you shook your head. Pulling away from him long enough to watch the scene around you. “No, it’s nice out here. Let’s stay a little longer.”
You felt his lips connect with your temple. “Whatever you want, baby.”
“Did you and Boone get to slow dance?” you asked, a hint of playfulness evident in your tone. 
Tyler snorted. “No, we hadn’t gotten the chance yet.”
“Shame,” you muttered groggily. “You’re such a good dancer.” 
“Well you know I’d much prefer to dance with you.”
“Hey,” Boone piped in. “Now see? I know y’all are the world’s cutest couple and all that bullshit. But that right there very much hurts my feelings, T.” 
You both laughed at his antics. 
“Sorry, Boone,” Tyler said. “You’ve got tough competition.”
“Aw, c’mon Boone,” Lilly said. “Don’t let them get to ya. Dani and I will dance with you– c’mon.” 
Together, the three of them got up and joined the crowd of people dancing, leaving you and Tyler alone. 
“Alright, Owens,” you said, mustering up the strength to climb off his lap. “Our turn. Show me what kind of dance moves you got.”
He let you drag him towards a quieter part of the lawn. Using one hand, Tyler gripped your waist and pulled you close. With the other, he cupped your hand to hold out from him. Gently, he began swaying you back and forth to the beat of the song. 
“I don’t know if you’ve ever told me who taught you to dance,” you observed. 
“My mom,” he replied softly. His green eyes sparkled– the same way they did anytime he talked about his mom. 
“I’d never wanted to go to any of the school dances– never had an interest. I was always workin’ the farm or out with friends. But in my junior year of high school, I was trying to impress this girl. Her name was Sally Wakefield– so, I bought us a coupla’ tickets to the prom without even asking her first.”
“What?” you laughed. 
“I know, I know–” he said. “I got the order a little backwards there. Anyway, I went to my mom and told her I had a date to the prom and that I had to learn how to dance before. So, we spent an entire weekend in the living room. She had me push all the furniture– the couch and table and all the chairs, to the side and make a little dance floor. She put her Elton John records on repeat and that's how I learned to dance.” 
“That’s really sweet,” you smiled, just imagining teenage-Tyler slow dancing in the living room with his mom. 
“Yeah, well it didn’t end so sweet. I asked Sally Wakefield to prom the next Monday at school and she laughed in my face,” he chuckled. “So all that hard work went right to waste.”
You scoffed. “Fuck Sally Wakefield.” 
“I actually ran into her at the market a few years back– she was really nice. She’s married, has a few kids now..”
“It was for cathartic effect, Tyler. But if you insist– fuck high-school version of Sally Wakefield.”
“Oh–” he nodded. “Right. Yeah, fuck high school Sally Wakefield.”
“Plus,” you added, melting a little inside as soon as your eyes connected with his. “I don’t think all that hard work went to waste. I, for one, really enjoy dancing with you.” 
His face beamed as he gazed down at you softly. “Remember that night we went line dancin’ when we were down in Austin?”
You let out a bubble of laughter as you leaned into his embrace. “Oh my God, and Boone slipped on the lemonade that lady spilled–”
Tyler chuckled. “Him and his beer went flyin’.”
“I swear I have never seen a human being hit the ground that hard,” you said through your laughter. 
“Me either–”
“Remember when we went to your cousin's wedding– and they had that live band and an entire dance floor and we were like… the only people using it? Everyone else just stayed at their tables.”
Tyler shook his head. “Still can’t believe that.”
“Yeah, I mean ninety-five degrees or not… if I go to a wedding, I’m dancing.”
“What about your wedding?” Tyler asked suddenly, gaze softening as he peered down at you. 
Something in your chest fluttered. It wasn’t the first time Tyler had mentioned weddings or marriage, but every time he did, it pleasantly reminded you that you two were in this for the long haul. 
“What about my wedding?” you said, trying to sound casual. 
“Will there be lots of dancing at your wedding?” 
You pulled back gently from Tyler’s embrace, just enough so that you could get a better look at him. You marveled at how handsome he really was– especially under the soft, flickering glow from the fire. 
“Of course there’ll be dancing– lots of it. I wouldn’t want all your mom’s hard work to go to waste now would I?”
Tyler’s swaying slowed as he took a moment to really study you. His gaze was soft and sweet and intimate all at once. Unable to help yourself, your face broke out into an even wider grin.
“What?” he wondered.
“Nothing,” you shook your head, biting your lip. “You’re just lookin’ at me like you love me. And that makes me smile.” 
Tyler beamed. “I love you so much– you know that, right?” 
Without even hesitating you nodded. “Course I do,” you replied, leaning your head against his chest and allowing him to tighten his hold on you. “I love you, too.”
For a few more minutes, the two of you swayed casually to the music. Tyler’s embrace was safe and warm and comforting, and the longer you danced like that, the more tired you became. 
“Think we’ll see anything tomorrow?” you yawned sleepily into his shirt. You felt his cheek rest on top of your head, nestling you into the crook of his neck.  
Tyler clicked his tongue above you. “I don’t think so. Dexter wasn’t tracking anything on the radar, but you never know.” 
“What if we just had a slow day tomorrow? We could just sleep in and hang out here for another day? I saw they had a pool out back– that’d keep Boone entertained.” 
“That’s not a bad idea,” he said. “I think we could make that work.” 
You smiled against his skin, eyelids growing heavier and heavier. Gradually, you began leaning more and more of your weight against him, until finally, he gave your back a gentle rub. 
“Let’s say you and I head up to the room, yeah?”
You nodded against him, too tired to reply. 
“There we go,” he said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. You leaned into his side, letting him guide the way. He called goodnight to everyone for you before practically carrying you up the flight of stairs towards the room. 
When you were finally inside, Tyler helped you climb into bed. You frowned when he didn’t immediately follow. Instead, you watched him head into the bathroom and close the door. 
With how tired you were– you were surprised you didn’t fall asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow. But the longer you laid there without Tyler, the more awake you felt. 
After only a few short minutes, he emerged from the bathroom and crossed the room quietly. 
“You’re not asleep yet?” he asked, peeling back the covers and climbing into bed beside you. “Thought you’d be snorin’ by the time I came back.”
Without replying, you scooted across the bed until you were wrapped back up in his embrace. You felt arms wound around your waist, anchoring you to him. You smelled his aftershave and mouthwash as you nuzzled into his chest. You heard the sound of his heartbeat, even through the fabric of his T-shirt. His presence totally engulfed all of your senses– and you knew that was exactly how it should be. 
As you finally drifted off, all you knew was Tyler, Tyler, Tyler. 
And what a wonderful thing to know. 
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with-my-calamitous-love · 28 days ago
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IN PLAIN SIGHT YOU HID / BUT YOU ARE WHAT YOU DID
katsuki bakugou x reader
same concept as the boyfriend thoughts ❅ breakup version
inspired by the smallest man who ever lived
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katsuki bakugou, who, towards the end, wonders if any of it was true. he tried to picture you, gazing at him starry eyed. but those days are gone, and his heart hurts thinking of this future.
katsuki bakugou, who swears that in some other universe, things are okay. who knows that somewhere else in the world, he’s sitting across from you on the kitchen table, going over the grocery list. who gives you more time and more space, and who actually listens to what you say.
katsuki bakugou, who’s got a reputation. who starts dating you when the everyone hated him, and you loved him. who breaks things off with everyone loving him, and losing you.
katsuki bakugou, who can’t control his temper anymore. who is always an asshole, but who snaps when someone breaths wrong. who misses you more than anything, and copes with it by making it everyone elses problem. who relies on kirishima at night to keep him sane, tearing his heart out to his best friend over the phone.
katsuki bakugou, who hung you on his wall and stabbed you with his push pins. who, in public, loved to show you off. who knew he was nothing like that in private. who knew you deserved so much better but was too selfish to wanna let you go. who wishes he could turn back time and be what you deserved.
katsuki bakugou, who keeps all of your photos on his phone. who doesn’t even dare deleting them. who avoids his camera roll like the god damn plague. who wants to cry when he finally does delete everything, staring at the 1,768 deleted photos in his recently deleted folder. who replays old voice mails. who sometimes calls you and listens to it, because he knows you won’t answer.
katsuki bakugou, who you’re sure was sent by someone who wanted you dead. who tells you that its for your own good, that he needs to think things through. he books you an uber back to your apartment, and who helps you pack your things. who tells you he’s too busy, that he has to put his job first. who you can’t even argue with.
katsuki bakugou, who seemed like he was always ready to break your heart. who slept with a gun underneath your bed. who once loved you so tenderly, so delicately, and who know acts like you don’t exist. who you can’t quite declassify, not even if you had 50 years. who makes you wonder if he’ll ever confess why he did it. good riddance.
katsuki bakugou, who you see with other people, in news articles and through whispers from your friends. who thinks its sexy now that its not forbidden. who uses meaningless sex to mask how badly he misses you. who sleeps next to a stranger but dreams of you.
katsuki bakugou, who hops on a plane to LA. he tells everyone its to follow in all might’s footsteps, and he’s not lying- but apart of it is to escape his pain. who sees your face everywhere. who smells your scent on his sweaters. who finds one of your hairties in his jeans pocket and holds onto it like a god damn lifeline.
katsuki bakugou, who deserves prison for what he’s done to you, but won’t serve time. who watches as the media tears you to shreds, blaming you for the breakup. who tries to stop it but is rendered powerless when he sees how the heartbreak has been turned into entertainment. who hates that all of this has happened because you loved him.
katsuki bakugou, who slips through the bars. who’s thumb hovers over your contact during a late night. who fucked up. who misses you and just wants to love you once more. who wants to change his prophecy, fearing that this might kill him. who misses you stronger than anything he’s ever felt.
katsuki bakugou, who you miss just as much. who you dream about every night. who still hurts you, even when its something small like his name brought up in conversation. who makes you wonder what went wrong. who crashes your parties and your rental cars just thinking about him.
katsuki bakugou, who doesn’t expect your forgiveness, and wants you to forget. who watches your life through the glass, over the years as you move on. who knows that nothing will change what he’s done, and has to lie in that bed. who knows he hasn’t wasted a single ounce of his love, because all of it is yours to keep. who is the smallest man who’s ever lived.
part 2 where he gets redemption? u guys lmk 🫧
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mywritersmind · 1 month ago
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HI KIMI - KA12
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summary : she loves to tease, he can’t help but blush.
listen up : not proofread! kinda hate it! totowolffdaughter!reader. really into the whole bosses daughter thing rn
word count :
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My weekend will always be good when I'm at the Paddock. But there’s one factor that may make it a bit more interesting. A dangerous factor that it’s tan, cute, with curly hair. The same factor that is completely off limits.
Kimi Antonelli walks into the garage as I sit in an engineer's seat, chewing gum and scrolling on my phone.
Most everyone is gone on break except for a few sticking around and talking about the cars. I spin around in the chair so I’m facing him, blowing a bubble with my gum and grinning, “Hi, Kimi.”
He walks up to me slowly, smirking. “Hey, Wolff.”
“How’s my favorite future driver, today?” I sit up straight as he shrugs, clearly liking my antics.
“Pretty good.” He sits across from me, “You?”
Before I can answer, I'm interrupted by my lovely father, yelling. “Y/n! Your mom wants you.” I pout at him as he eyes Kimi, “Now.”
I sigh dramatically and stand, “Duty calls.” I smile at Kimi, not missing the blush on his cheeks as I walk past my dad and into the hallway.
Kimi and I have known eachother forever, my dads obsessed with him, and he’s on the grid for next year. This means two things for my dad,
Mr. Toto Wolff will have someone to bandage his broken heart after Lewis.
He will have a permanent headache with me and Kimi around 24/7.
My dad loves Kimi, he loves him so much that he won’t let me get near the kid! As soon as puberty hit and Kimi started blushing at me, my dad vetoed even the thought of us.
But now we’re adults, and Kimi got hot.
⋆。‧˚⋆
I do have another job then being a permanent fixture to annoy my father and flirt with Kimi. I’m interning with Mercedes (yeah i’m a nepo baby, cry about it.) I work with their socials (yes that’s why they’re so funny!)
I’m videoing Lewis talking to Kimi because apparently I'm the only one who can get Lewis to shoot a funny video. They let me enjoy my tiktok trend before Lewis and George are off in their cars.
I stand with my dad and Kimi, watching them go around for quali.
As soon as Lewis gets out in Q1 and my dad just stares at the screen, I tap Kimi and motion to the door.
We end up in hospitality with all the food, “Are you going to use me to piss off your dad, forever?” He grabs his plate and sits next to me, we both turn behind us to see the cars go around the track.
I shrug and sip my water, “Yes. But I don’t just mess with you to mess with him.” He raises a brow, “I do it because you blushing is hilarious and sorta cute.” He blushes at my words.
“You’re the worst.” He bites into his cookie, “And are probably gonna get me fired.”
I laugh, “Please, my dad would fire me before you!”
He sighs and rests his head against the chair, his curls falling into his face. We watch Alex spin but straighten himself out, both of us sighing. It’s weird to think that Kimi is going to be in one of those cars next year.
“Are you scared?” I face him, his head tilts to me, thinking about it.
“Not really. I’ve always known it’s dangerous but I'm moving up for a reason.” When my dad told me Kimi was getting the 2025 seat, I told him he was too young.
I would die if Kimi found out, but I have to watch all my friends, people who are like brothers to me, crash and take eachother out every week. So maybe I'm a little scared for him.
“You okay?” I realize i’ve been zoning out, So I nod and smile, “Ready to go back? Quali is almost over and i’m trying to get the team to like m-” My eyes are pulled away from him as I see the familiar black and teal car go into the gravel.
“It’s over, now, actually.” We both cringe at George ending quali, “Congratulations Lando.”
“Do not go drool all over him, Wolff.” we start to make our way back, turning to Kimi so i’m walking backwards.
“Kimi Antonelli! Are you jealous?” He doesn’t find his amusing.
“I’m going to find Ollie.” He rolls his eyes at my kissing noises.
“Have fun with your boyfriend!” He flips me off, “Talk about me!” He looks back, shooting me a look that makes my stomach flip.
“I always do.” His accent is smooth and easy.
“What?” He keeps walking away from me, “You always do what!? Talk about me? Have fun with the horsey haas!? Kimi!”
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The next day I follow the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders around. They're crazy pretty and so talented in a way that’s different from all the drivers I'm constantly around.
I leave them be when Ollie drags me in front of the camera for F1 TV. Ollie and I grab coffee and look around for a bit before we find Kimi who’s holding a plate full of whipped cream.
“I’m getting flashbacks to your birthday.” I shake my head as we approach him, “We could always recreate it!” I reach for the plate but he pulls it away quickly. Damn drivers' reflexes.
“Hey, some people from the track are coming to my hotel and swimming tonight. Wanna join? My least favorite thing about America is the whole 21 thing. But sober fun is still fun!” Ollie claps his hands together, Kini and I nod before Kimi and I get called back into the Mercedes garage.
My dad eyes us, “Really Y/n?” I furrow my brows at him, this time I actually did nothing wrong! I sit with Carmen during the race, cringing as Lewis gets rolled back into the garage.
But George does great and I try hard not to laugh as I listen to his radio. George and Carmen are like my parents in Mercedes. Even though my actual parents are in Mercedes too.
Honestly the day goes by in a blur, I avoid the garage because Lewis did poorly and George did well. So the vibes are off and I make my way to Vcarb.
Except I get intercepted by Kimi and a cupcake. I take it suspiciously, “Poison?”
“You’ll have to find out.” He deadpans as we walk slowly. Suddenly I'm not in a rush to congratulate Liam.
The cupcake is very good and not poisonous. I groan, tilting my head back, “Fuck, K, I could kiss you!”
He stays quiet as I finish my cupcake. When I look at him he’s looking away with an odd expression on his face, “Relax Antonelli, I promise I won’t kiss you.”
He bites back a smile, “Don’t make promises neither of us want you to keep.” This is unusual. Kimi doesn’t usually flirt back. He’ll make a remark or two but the austin air must be doing something to him.
It makes me feel weird and I like it.
Liam rounds the corner with a smile on his face. I snap out of focusing on Kimi and hug Liam quickly, “Ew. You’re gross. But congratulations!”
“Yeah you killed it mate.” Kimi fist bumps the blonde as he nods.
“Points and fucking with fernando! I’m proud.” Liam laughs and thanks us. But a weird part of me is still stuck on what Kimi said.
When he nudges me after Liam leaves, I flinch, “Shit, Wolff. You’ve been weird today.” He just walks away, I follow while running my hands over my face.
Fuck my life. What is happening!?
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“Ollie!” I hug the tall brit as he raises a brow, “Yay!”
“Thought we were supposed to be dry tonight.”
I would say, Well I’m with Kimi tonight so i’m never dry. But even I am can control myself better than that.
I just shrug as Kimi takes over, “She had two shots.”
“A confidence booster!” I smile and take my towel from mimi, skipping over to the girls.
I don’t have many girl friends around the paddock, but I like this group and they seem to like me too. We all get into our swimsuits, going to the bathroom so my friend can braid her hair.
“Who’s the italian?” a new girl says. She’s Ollie’s friend, I think she knows Franco too.
Lia Block, my favorite F1 related woman ever, laughs, “Ask Y/n.”
“Shit. Are you two dating?”
“Uh… no.” I laugh awkwardly.
“Oh!” She frowns, “So… hooking up?”
I shake my head, “No, just friends! We’ve known eachother forever.”
“I think they’re made to be!” Lia wraps her arms around my shoulders, I can see her smiling in the mirror, “But Kimi is a shy idiot.”
“But he’s single?”
Lia laughs uncomfortably, “I think it’s time to swim!”
The water is freezing so I end up in the jacuzzi with Lia. I’m watching Kimi talk to his new girl, “He’s not flirting, you know.”
I dunk my head but she pulls me back up, “He can be!”
“No!” She shakes me, “You’re a big fat liar!”
“He has free will! I like to flirt with him, not be with him!” Her eyes narrow before Kimi jumps into the jacuzzi, splashing us.
Lia shakes her head and dives back in the pool, Kimi frowns at her, “What do I smell?”
I sink back into the water, suddenly feeling very aware of my every movement in my black bikini. “Yeah, like pool water.”
He sits on the step next to me, the water up to his neck as he warms up, “I’ve come to hide.” He floats closer towards me.
“Ollie bugging you?” I joke as he shakes his head.
“You told her I was single!”
“You are!”
He gives me a look. The type of look that makes me want him to say that he isn’t, and that I’m not either. “You could have lied.”
“And why would I do that?” His eyes meet mine and it’s that feeling again. He looks away, the blush on his cheeks not from the steam.
“Kimi!” The girl yells from the pool and he turns to me slowly.
“You did this.”
I scoff, “I did not! If you aren’t single then who will I flirt with.” I pout, joking as he moves his arm around me, touching the jacuzzi wall and not me.
I smirks a bit, “If I wasn’t single I'd be with you.”
I lean in, “When did you get so confident?”
“Quite recently actually!” I could have sworn his eyes flickered down to my lips, “I learned from the best.”
“You speak so highly of me, I'm honored.”
“You should hear my thoughts.” I narrow my eyes at him, trying not to look at his arms or past his chin at all.
“You’re playing with fire here, Antonelli.”
He tilts his head, “You play with me everyday.”
“This payback?”
“No. Just foreplay.” I almost choke. My cheeks going red as Kimis smile grows, “You look good blushing too.”
“Time to swim!” I hurry away and practically fall into the pool. I dunk my head, thinking about today.
Next week will be worse, we have plans for next week! Mexico is next week.
I will be ignoring him next week.
440 notes · View notes
colleendoran · 10 months ago
Text
Great Big Good Omens Graphic Novel Update
AKA A Visit From Bildad the Shuhite.
The past year or so has been one long visit from this guy, whereupon he smiteth my goats and burneth my crops, woe unto the woeful cartoonist.
Gaze upon the horror of Bildad the Shuhite.
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You kind of have to be a Good Omens fan to get this joke, but trust me, it's hilarious.
Anyway, as a long time Good Omens novel fan, you may imagine how thrilled I was to get picked to adapt the graphic novel.
 Go me!  
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This is quite a task, I have to say, especially since I was originally going to just draw (and color) it, but I ended up writing the adaptation as well. Tricky to fit a 400 page novel into a 160-ish page graphic novel, especially when so much of the humor is dependent on the language, and not necessarily on the visuals.
Not complainin', just sayin'.
Anyway, I started out the gate like a herd of turtles, because  right away I got COVID which knocked me on my butt. 
And COVID brain fog? That's a thing. I already struggle with brain fog due to autoimmune disease, and COVID made it worse.
Not complainin' just sayin'.
This set a few of the assignments on my plate back, which pushed starting Good Omens back. 
But hey, big fat lead time! No worries!
Then my computer crawled toward the grave.
My trusty MAC Pro Tower was nearly 15 years old when its sturdy heart ground to a near-halt with daily crashes. I finally got around to doing some diagnostics; some of its little brain actions were at 5% functionality. I had no reliable backups.
There are so many issues with getting a new computer when you haven't had a new computer or peripherals in nearly fifteen years and all of your software, including your Photoshop program is fifteen years old.
At the time, I was still on rural internet...which means dial-up speed.
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Whatever you have for internet in the city, roll that clock back to about 2001.
That's what I had. I not only had to replace almost all of my hardware but I had to load and update all programs at dial-up speed.
Welcome to my gigabyte hell.
The entire process of replacing the equipment and programs took weeks and then I had to relearn all the software.
All of this was super expensive in terms of money and time cost.
But I was not daunted! Nosirree!
I still had a huge lead time! I can do anything! I have an iron will!
And boy, howdy, I was going to need it.
At about the same time, a big fatcat quadrillionaire client who had hired me years ago to develop a big, major transmedia project for which I was paid almost entirely in stock, went bankrupt leaving everyone holding the bag, and taking a huge chunk of my future retirement fund with it.
I wrote a very snarky almost hilarious Patreon post about it, but am not entirely in a position to speak freely because I don't want to get sued. Even though I had to go to court over it, (and I had to do that over Zoom at dial-up speed,) I'm pretty sure I'll never get anything out of this drama, and neither will anyone else involved, except millionaire dude and his buddies who all walked away with huge multi-million dollar bonuses weeks before they declared bankruptcy, all the while claiming they would not declare bankruptcy.
Even the accountant got $250,000 a month to shut down the business, while creators got nothing.
That in itself was enough drama for the year, but we were only at February by that point, and with all those months left, 2023 had a lot more to throw at me.
Fresh from my return from my Society of Illustrators show, and a lovely time at MOCCA, it was time to face practical medical issues, health updates, screening, and the like. I did my adult duty and then went back to work hoping for no news, but still had a weird feeling there would be news.
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I know everyone says that, but I mean it. I had a bad feeling.
Then there was news.
I was called back for tests and more tests. This took weeks. The ubiquitous biopsy looked, even to me staring at the screen in real time, like bad news. 
It also hurt like a mofo after the anesthesia wore off. I wasn't expecting that.
Then I got the official bad news.
Cancer which runs in my family finally got me. Frankly, I was surprised I didn't get it sooner.
Stage 0, and treatment would likely be fast and complication-free. Face the peril, get it over with, and get back to work. 
I requested surgery months in the future so I could finish Good Omens first, but my doc convinced me the risk of waiting was too great. Get it done now.
"You're really healthy," my doc said. Despite an auto-immune issue which plagues me, I am way healthier than the average schmoe of late middle age. She informed me I would not even need any chemo or radiation if I took care of this now.
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So I canceled my appearance at San Diego Comic Con. I did not inform the Good Omens team of my issues right away, thinking this would not interfere with my work schedule, but I did contact my agent to inform her of the issue. I also contacted a lawyer to rewrite my will and make sure the team had access to my digital files in case there were complications.
Then I got back to work, and hoped for the best.
Eff this guy.
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Before I could even plant my carcass on the surgery table, I got a massive case of ocular shingles.
I didn't even know there was such a thing. 
There I was, minding my own business. I go to bed one night with a scratchy eye, and by 4 PM the next day, I was in the emergency room being told if I didn't get immediate specialist treatment, I was in big trouble.
I got transferred to another hospital and got all the scary details, with the extra horrid news that I could not possibly have cancer surgery until I was free of shingles, and if I did not follow a rather brutal treatment procedure - which meant super-painful  eye drops every half hour, twenty-four hours a day and daily hospital treatment - I could lose the eye entirely, or be blinded, or best case scenario, get permanent eye damage.
What was even funnier (yeah, hilarity) is the drops are so toxic if you don't use the medication just right, you can go blind anyway.
Hi Ho.
Ulcer is on the right. That big green blob.
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I had just finished telling my cancer surgeon I did not even really care about getting cancer, was happy it was just stage zero, had no issues with scarring, wanted no reconstruction, all I cared about was my work. 
Just cut it out and get me back to work.
And now I wondered if I was going to lose my ability to work anyway.
Shingles often accompanies cancer because of the stress on the immune system, and yeah, it's not pretty. This is me looking like all heck after I started to get better.
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The first couple of weeks were pretty demoralizing as I expected a straight trajectory to wellness. But it was up and down all the way. 
Some days I could not see out of either eye at all. The swelling was so bad that I had to reach around to my good eye to prop the lid open. Light sensitivity made seeing out of either eye almost impossible. Outdoors, even with sunglasses, I had to be led around by the hand.
I had an amazing doctor. I meticulously followed his instructions, and I think he was surprised I did. The treatment is really difficult, and if you don't do it just right no matter how painful it gets, you will be sorry. 
To my amazement, after about a month, my doctor informed me I had no vision loss in the eye at all. "This never happens," he said.
I'd spent a couple of weeks there trying to learn to draw in the near-dark with one eye, and in the end, I got all my sight back.
I could no longer wear contact lenses (I don't really wear them anyway, unless I'm going to the movies,) would need hard core sun protection for awhile, and the neuralgia and sun sensitivity were likely to linger. But I could get back to work.
I have never been more grateful in my life.
Neuralgia sucks, by the way, I'm still dealing with it months later.
Anyway, I decided to finally go ahead and tell the Good Omens team what was going on, especially since this was all happening around the time the Kickstarter was gearing up.
Now that I was sure I'd passed the eye peril, and my surgery for Stage 0 was going to be no big deal, I figured all was a go. I was still pretty uncomfortable and weak, and my ideal deadline was blown, but with the book not coming out for more than a year, all would be OK. I quit a bunch of jobs I had lined up to start after Good Omens, since the project was going to run far longer than I'd planned.
Everybody on the team was super-nice, and I was pretty optimistic at this time. But work was going pretty slow during, as you may imagine.
But again...lots of lead time still left, go me.
Then I finally got my surgery.
Which was not as happy an experience as I had been hoping for.
My family said the doc came out of the operating room looking like she'd been pulled backwards through a pipe, She informed them the tumor which looked tiny on the scan was "...huge and her insides are a mess."
Which was super not fun news.
Eff this guy.
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The tumor was hiding behind some dense tissue and cysts. After more tests, it was determined I'd need another surgery and was going to have to get further treatments after all.
The biopsy had been really painful, but the discomfort was gone after about a week, so no biggee. The second surgery was, weirdly, not as painful as the biopsy, but the fatigue was big time.
By then, the Good Omens Kickstarter had about run its course, and the record-breaker was both gratifying and a source of immense social pressure.
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I'd already turned most of my social media over to an assistant, and I'm glad I did.
But the next surgery was what really kicked me on my keister.
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All in all, they took out an area the size of a baseball. It was  hard to move and wiped me out for weeks and weeks. I could not take care of myself. I'd begun losing hair by this time anyway, and finally just lopped it off since it was too heavy for me to care for myself. The cut hides the bald spots pretty well.
After about a month, I got the go-ahead to travel to my show at the San Diego Comic Con Museum (which is running until the first week of April, BTW). I was very happy I had enough energy to do it. But as soon as I got back, I had to return to treatment.
Since I live way out in the country, going into the city to various hospitals and pharmacies was a real challenge. I made more than 100 trips last year, and a drive to the compounding pharmacy which produced the specialist eye medicine I could not get anywhere else was six hours alone.
Naturally, I wasn't getting anything done during this time.
But at least my main hospital is super swank.
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The oncology treatment went smoothly, until it didn't. The feels don't hit you until the end. By then I was flattened.
So flattened that I was too weak to control myself, fell over, and smashed my face into some equipment.
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Nearly tore off my damn nostril.
Eff this guy.
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Anyway, it was a bad year.
Here's what went right.
I have a good health insurance policy. The final tally on my health care costs ended up being about $150,000. I paid about 18% of that, including insurance. I had a high deductible and some experimental medicine insurance didn't cover. I had savings,  enough to cover the months I wasn't working, and my Patreon is also very supportive. So you didn't see me running a Gofundme or anything.
Thanks to everyone who ever bought one of my books.
No, none of that money was Good Omens Kickstarter money. I won't get most of my pay on that for months, which is just as well because it kept my taxes lower last year when I needed a break.
So, yay.
My nose is nearly healed. I opted out of plastic surgery, and it just sealed up by itself. I'll never be ready for my closeup, but who the hell cares.
I got to ring the bell.
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I had a very, VERY hard time getting back to work, especially with regard to focus and concentration. My work hours dropped by over 2/3. I was so fractured and weak, time kept slipping away while I sat in the studio like a zombie. Most of the last six months were a wash.
I assumed focus issues were due (in part) to stress, so sought counseling. This seemed like a good idea at first, but when the counselor asked me to detail my issues with anxiety, I spent two weeks doing just that and getting way more anxious, which was not helpful.
After that I went EFF THIS NOISE, I want practical tools, not touchy feelies (no judgment on people who need touchy-feelies, I need a pragmatic solution and I need it now,) so tried using the body doubling focus group technique for concentration and deep work.
Within two weeks, I returned to normal work hours.
I got rural broadband, jumping me from dial up speed to 1 GB per second.
It's a miracle.
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Massive doses of Vitamin D3 and K2. Yay.
The new computer works great.
The Kickstarter did so well, we got to expand the graphic novel to 200 pages. Double yay.
I'm running late, but everyone on the Good Omens team is super supportive. I don't know if I am going to make the book late or not, but if I do, well, it surely wasn't on purpose, and it won't be super late anyway. I still have months of lead time left.
I used to be something of a social media addict, but now I hardly ever even look at it, haven't been directly on some sites in over a year, and no longer miss it. It used to seem important and now doesn't.
More time for real life.
While I think the last year aged me about twenty years, I actually like me better with short hair. I'm keeping it.
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OK. Rough year. 
Not complainin', just sayin'.
Back to work on The Book.
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And only a day left to vote for Good Omens, Neil Gaiman, and Sandman in the Comicscene Awards. Thanks. 
2K notes · View notes
lynnie-ee · 1 month ago
Text
Day 11; Dream.
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╰┈➤"Your assignment for Crewel's class was easy; brewing a potion that allowed you to dream about your future at night. But you didn't expect a housewarden to appear on it, and even less to encounter him the morning after, as you were well aware of what waited for the two of you."
╰►Gender neutral reader, scenarios, 1.8k words. Mentions of marriage in almost all of them, mention of children in Kalim's part.
╰► Characters: Riddle, Leona, Kalim, Vil.
╰►Note: The prompts are based on words I found interesting and then I put them on a roulette to decide when I would write about them, lol. English is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any grammatical mistakes <3. Not proof read, I haven't written in a long time, so I apologise if anything is out of character.
╰►Masterlist / Inktober Masterlist.
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“So, if we do the potion correctly we’ll be able to dream about our future tonight?”
“That’s right, pup.” Professor Crewel nodded as he pointed at the board, where the steps for the potion were clearly written in detail, with all the considerations that were expected to be taken for the use of the components for the potion.
“That’s so cool…” Deuce mumbled, his eyes observing the board with excitement.
“You have an hour; you can start now.” Crewel signalized as each of you started to work on your potion.
By the end of the class, and after everyone had finished, it was finally the moment to drink the potion. You sighed with exhaustion, after spending the last hour doing your assignment at the same time as you helped Grim with his own potion.
“I already know I’ll be the greatest mage of all but it doesn’t hurt to see it by myself!” Grim spoke with a confident demeanour, drinking the potion immediately. You just giggled and imitated his action, although a bit slower than him.
The next morning, as you walked towards your classroom, you encountered Ace and Deuce in the middle of the hallway, with disappointed expressions on their faces.
“Oh, hello Prefect.” Deuce mumbled as soon as he saw you, which made you curious of their attitude.
“What’s the matter, boys? The potion didn’t work?” You frowned slightly, wondering what kind of future they could have for them to be in such a bad mood.
“I didn’t dream anything.” He sighed, as Ace groaned next to him.
���Me neither.” The Heartslabyul first-year murmured irritated. “Man, this really sucks…”
“Were you able to have the dream, Prefect?”
You stared at both of your friends for a few seconds, a sensation of heat reaching your cheeks after you recalled the events of the last night. You coughed to try to cover up your embarrassment, deciding to keep your dream to yourself.
“…No, I didn’t. A pity, really. Very unfortunate. Let’s go to class already, okay?” You suggested, walking past them to continue your way towards the classroom, too focussed on running away to notice the other student who was walking in the opposite direction, promptly crashing into him before you could avoid it.
“Oh, Prefect, are you okay?” You heard a voice call you as he held you to prevent you from falling.
‘Please don’t be him, please don’t be him…’ You thought to yourself as you raised your head to see the person who was talking to you. ‘Great Sevens, it’s him.’
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﹙❥﹚Riddle Rosehearts ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
“A pristine and beautiful home. Multiple pictures hung around the walls, along with diplomas and newspaper clippings that were arranged by you. A warm kitchen, a freshly baked strawberry tart on the table, matching hedgehog mugs. The front door opens, Riddle enters your home as he takes off his coat, immediately walking towards you to greet you with a soft kiss, far gentler than you have ever seen him before.
‘Hello, my rose. I see you got out of work early. Ah, you baked strawberry tart? But you must be tired. I’ll make tea while you take a break. What are you saying? I should be making herbal tea according to the Queen’s rules because of the hour? Just like old times…Fine, I’ll indulge you. Just rest for now, alright? I love you too.’ “
“I asked if you’re alright. Perhaps you hit yourself in the head?” Riddle, the actual Riddle asked once again, as you stared at him while still remembering your dream from last night.
“No, I’m okay!” You quickly stand straight, enlarging the distance between him and you, as he observes you with a stoic frown, an expression quite different from the one you recalled from the future. “I was just distracted. You probably were on your way to class, please don’t worry.”
“It’s nothing.” He mumbled, watching your nervous expression as he wondered the reason behind your unusual behaviour. “You’ll be late if you stand there, don’t get too distracted.” He added before turning back, making you sigh out of relief as you expected to be left alone to die of embarrassment by yourself, until Riddle looked at you briefly. “Ah, now I remember. Trey asked me to invite you to Heartslabyul this afternoon. He baked strawberry tart and said you might fancy an invitation.”
You stared at him for a few seconds, the question slipping out of your mouth before you could think about it. “Oh, of course, that’s your favourite, right?”
“You are correct, Prefect. Though, I wonder how you knew about that.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at his puzzled expression.
“I just guessed it right, you could say.”
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﹙➹﹚Leona Kingscholar ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶ
“A crowded room, different people greeting you left and right, the sound of lively chattering. A frown on your beloved’s expression, Kifaji’s attentive gaze upon the two of you, the beautiful moonlight outside the ballroom. A hand guiding you outside the room, gently taking you to the garden to comfortably lay on the ground with him laying his head on your lap.
‘I couldn’t bear it anymore, I bet you were also tired from so many people. Being the spouse of the Second Prince isn’t all that good now, hm? What are you saying, you’re alright with it if it’s for me? You get so emotional at late hours, herbivore. You look exhausted, come here, I’ll carry you back to our room. Don’t you think I’ll do it for free, though, you better be a nice pillow when we arrive.’ “
“Watch where you’re going.” A harsh voice took out of your thoughts, a deadpanned expression on your voice when you realized the contrast between your dream and the man standing before you with the biggest scowl, showing you his annoyance. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class?”
“I was on my way, actually.” You stood with your back straight, trying to appear taller to show him confidence. “What about you? Aren’t you supposed to have class with Trein at this hour?”
“He’s not gonna notice, either way.” He watched as you frowned at him. “And I don’t care if he does, honestly. I’m going to the Botanical Garden, you’re coming to.” He took you by the arm to drag you in the opposite direction you were walking, a perplexed look on your face as Ace and Deuce continued their path instead of helping you.
“And why do I have to?!”
“Hm? You almost made me fall just now, don’t think I’ll let you slide that so easily."
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﹙ꕤ﹚Kalim Al-Asim ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
“Soft pillows all around the living room, warm tea, a beautiful scenery outside the window. The pleasant air of the Scalding Sands, the smell of freshly cooked meals, the joyful expressions of the children around you, were they your own or were they Kalim’s siblings? Him entering the room with the most contagious smile, running to you as soon as he spotted you to hold you in his arms, kissing you excitedly, a subtle urgency in his touch.”
‘Ah, I missed you so much! I didn’t leave for long, but I really needed to see you again. My trip was perfect, I hadn’t visited Jamil in such a long time so we talked a lot, and he sent you his greetings too! You should come with me next time, or would rather visit your friends at the Queendom of Roses? Whatever you want, I’ll arrange it immediately, so please tell me, sunshine.’ ”
“Ohhh, I’m so sorry! I wasn’t looking, are you okay Prefect?” Kalim was quick to ask, promptly inspecting your appearance to make sure you were alright.
"Yes, please don't worry, I should've been more careful..."
"What is it? Are you feeling tired, Prefect?"
"...Yeah, I didn't sleep well last night." You decided to use an excuse, not wanting to dig too deeply into your dreams from last night.
"You're always so busy! Perhaps you want to stop by Scarabia after class? Jamil is making curry tonight, maybe that'll make you feel better." He smiled warmly at you, his expression so sincere that it was hard for you to decline his invitation.
"I wouldn't want to bother you or Jamil, to be honest-"
"You're never a bother! You can also invite your friends, if you want. I'll be waiting for you, okay?"
You couldn't help but imitate his smile, chuckling at his kind demeanour.
"Of course, I'll be there."
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﹙𑁍﹚Vil Schoenheit ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
“Designer clothes, flashing lights, cameras all around you. The most elegant red carpet you’ve ever seen, posters with Vil’s face on it, fans screaming his name but also yours. His arm around your waist, reporters asking about your honeymoon, Vil replying how wonderful it was and how fortunate he was to have married such a lovely person.
‘I’m sorry, my love, I hope it wasn’t too exhausting for you. I’m glad you had a great night; you don’t know how grateful I am to you for joining me for these events. You’re concerned about being in the spotlight? You have nothing to worry about, my fans adore you. You shine naturally, my dear.’ “
“You should be more careful, Potato.” Vil’s usual stern voice rang in your ears, as you felt yourself blushing, the memories about him talking to you so sweetly still fresh in your mind. “And more attentive, too, did you rush outside your dorm without looking at yourself in the mirror?”
“I was just…distracted, this morning.”
“Don’t make excuses.” He added with a strict demeanour, but you could see that he was simply caring for you, in his own way, as he fixed your tie and buttoned up your blazer. “There it is, much better.”
“Thank you, dear.” You mumbled unconsciously, punching yourself mentally as soon as you realized the endearment that you added naturally, allowing you to observe for a brief moment Vil’s startled expression, which soon turned into an amused smile.
“A nice appearance is all it takes to make you that bold? You surely are unpredictable sometimes, Prefect. Good luck on your classes then, dear.”
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409 notes · View notes
acid-ixx · 5 months ago
Note
Ghost-Anon here!! 😋
Ooof the new chapter was good! I especially loved the part where Dick goes kinda nuts after Reader blocked him (as deserved :p ) more so I’m so excited for Yandere!Damian too xD
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hii !! tysm for enjoying the first chapter ^^ i was afraid that i wrote dick's descent to madness too quick but then i realized that "oh yeah it's literally dick we are talking about, times where he is at his limits are times where he lets the emotions control him." dick really does love his family, as proved in the comic panels i have read, and I don't like how most other comics picture him as just this silly guy who never gets mad at anyone.
he had his immense bouts of anger and frustration, it would be worse if it was caused by you, directly or not. the thing is, he understands where you're coming from. one of the things about dick grayson is that everyone loves him but himself. he has flaws that take a lot to fix, and they simply worsen when it comes to you because he had caused the same mistake bruce has committed. he was the same guy who criticized his own father for his mistakes, angered by jason's death and killing the joker after tim's own 'jokerfication' and yet he had never once noticed your demons, he allowed the world to take you away and destroy you; a crime greater than anything he could imagine.
the worst thing was, he was the same brother who had led your hopes high and crashed it at the same time. dick is the man who was described to be giving empty promises to you. it's bad enough that bruce had never even known about your presence, had never once talked to you, but dick had every opportunity to grab because truly, you saw him as your favorite before anyone else. everyone praised dick and you wanted the same praise from the next thing closer than your father— and he failed because he never tried, he failed his cute, little baby bird.
he knows that he needs to make it up to you before it gets worse but he also doesn't know that it's already too late.
you don't see him as the dick grayson. you don't see him in any positive light anymore other than the sheepish grins he would give you right after he rejects your offers.
if he wasn't so damn stupid, then you would've been there with him, at the mansion flipping through movies, pranking each other, throwing flour at one another when you bake, decorating your next diary entry with him.
and he needs to experience all that because you're the only normalcy that life has to offer. he momentarily relishes in the fact that you think so highly of him, but he breaks at the same time because all your other diary entries began to paint them all as your demons.
dick would ward the monsters away from you, he promises.
and this time, he genuinely means it.
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i am so excited for yan! damian too! i wrote his character to be terrible towards you (he doesn't know he's self-projecting lmao) but i had hinted in one paragraph of his relationship with the reader. you see, most of his feelings towards you may have stemmed from some sort of jealousy, or the feel the need for competition. he had already fought tim before, it's only right that you get to experience the same pain— and i'm not expanding on this because then it would spoil the future chapters hehe, but i'll be giving one small spoiler and say that damian would go through some sort of immense, internal breakdown at the thought of you.
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kyu-piddy · 22 days ago
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Ranking (some) twst love triangles on how messy they are
An: This is a very informal ranking and very informal type of writing. They’re just little overviews of how I personally think these love triangles would function. Hope you enjoy it. :)
Ps: This is the first time I publish something that features my favorite character! Hopefully I didn’t favor him too much.
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Gn reader x Trey, Cater, Azul, Jade, Jamil, Kalim, Silver, Lilia
Trigger warnings: Swearing
2.1k words
Tiers:
S tier- The love triangle of doom. Messiest love triangles, where it’s all too melodramatic and/or complicated.
A- Not as messy as the above, but still a delicate bomb to diffuse.
B- Standard love triangle. They aren’t at each other's throat constantly, but leave them alone long enough and they will start fighting.
C- Chill love triangle. Either because they’re really good friends, or just because they’re that confident in their victory.
D- Is this even a love triangle? There are indeed two people who like you, but one has dropped out of the race for one reason or the other.
Trey vs Cater
Do you know those times where you and a stranger are both trying to get through a door in opposite directions, and while trying to let the other pass you just keep getting in front of each other, in a sort of embarrassing dance of polite smiles while internally cursing the other person? Well, that is basically the Trey x Reader x Cater love triangle.
Cater and Trey are both really perceptive of their own feelings and of others, so they would be aware of the others' crush.
They’re also some of the fakest motherfuckers in the cast (only behind Azul, Jade and Jamil) so they would not even think of confronting each other.
Initially they’d put this veneer of pseudo politeness, throwing some double entendres to each other and not making any moves on you.
But as time progresses they’re definitely becoming little shits to each other.
Trey is exploiting his baking talent and his unique magic to the max, making your favorite foods and serving them to you and Cater, making sure you see how Cater gags as he tries it, the food's flavor being imposed with a horrid one like old socks.
Trey is also using his dependable and mature reputation to give you advice that subtly favors him and subtly makes Cater look like a dunce.
Man is full on telling you every embarrassing story of Caters disguised as going down on a trip to memory lane, but always while you’re with more people around, so they can tell you how Trey swept in and saved the day.
Cater on the other hand, is making sure to seduce you with his tech savviness and social media knowledge.
He’s taking you to the hottest places in town and taking pictures of you both, posting them on his magicam with suspicious captions that make a ton of your friends start asking about your “boyfriend”.
Cater is also loudly proclaiming to everyone who will listen in the Heartslabyul common room the plans he had that day with you.
He used to also proclaim the ones he would have in the future, but stopped after Trey crashed one of his cafe hopping dates with you, creating the most bizarre outing of your life, balancing the polite shit talking of these two.
If Cater didn’t live with Trey he’d probably dox him on the twisted wonderland equivalent of Twitter. Trey would do the same if he knew how to use Twitter.
The worst part is that neither of them will back off or give the finishing blow of confessing.
They're stuck in this loop of ruining the others momentum that their friendship is close to breaking, so either you notice and step up, or someone else notices and gives them a stern talking to.
Out of their dorm, the only one besides them I see figuring it out, is Ace, but Ace is no match for Trey and Cater.
They’re denying it to his face and making Ace feel like a complete idiot.
When you finally notice the mess that these two have made, if you don’t confront them, they’re still going to be in denial.
You have to be firm! Tell them head on who you want, before they make the whole of Heartslabyul collapse.
In terms of the messiness of this love triangle, I give it a B.
It’s annoying and messy, since they’re both so evasive and a little lacking in the making substantial moves department, but they’re still chill on how they treat you and the uninvolved parties (most of the time at least).
Azul vs Jade
Azul and Jade are both conniving and scheming master mind wannabes, but they also tend to rely on each other for support, so pairing them up against each other will lead to some sort of 4d intergalactic chess competition between them, while you are playing checkers and surprisingly still winning.
They’re the kind of smart that turns back around into being kind of stupid.
Jade is like a weird kid in a horror movie, all weird phrases and sinister smiles, but Azul isn’t much better with his mob boss vibe.
You can try running from them, but these fuckers must have put some sort of tracking gps on you because they always appear at the worst time.
Neither of them really knows how to even be romantic to win you over.
Azul is following some sort of guide like “How to make her fall for you in a fortnight”, taking notes and everything.
But he does tend to exaggerate with his gestures, not as much as Kalim would, but just enough to seem sorta of fake.
He’d even try to offer you suspiciously good deals, like “Go on a date with me and I’ll give you a study guide for alchemy”.
He only added one teensy eensy hidden clause that if he didn’t enjoy the date enough, you’d have to accept to go on another one.
But Jade is there to rain on his parade and tell you exactly what line and page you should search for suspicious activity.
Unlike Azul, Jade doesn’t try to conform to the human way of courting.
He is going to share his mushroom collection with you and also scare the shit out of you with ominous warnings of their specific properties.
He’d probably even make stuff up or embellish it to sound worse just to see your reaction.
Azul is definitely trying to end any time you have with Jade, giving him tasks right as the eel is spending time with you.
But it tends to go bad for Zuzu, as Jade just brings you along or purposefully half asses the task.
They’re also snipping each other with pointed comments that sound more like thinly veiled threats of violence.
Well, Jade’s threats are more violence oriented, while Azul’s are more of the mansplain manipulate malewife variety.
But what neither of them was prepared for was Floyd’s fourth wheeling.
Initially, Floyd thought it was pretty funny to see the other two beefing, but he gets bored fast.
He’s going to start taking you away from the other two so he can watch them fume in anger.
If he’s in the mood, he might even try to play matchmaker with one of them, or start shit talking both of them. The latter is more likely.
This is another pair of fools who won’t confess. They pride themselves so much as always being thirty steps ahead that they will try their hardest to create a situation where you have to choose one of them.
But it might all be for nothing because Floyd might just feel like telling you and then there goes any sense of mysteriousness down the drain.
I’ll give this love triangle an A. It’s definitely messy as hell, but it could always be worse.
Kalim vs Jalim
Oh boy. This is the love triangle from hell. Nuclear fallout levels of toxicity, and you’re the bomb.
This is a type of love triangle that no one even knows is a love triangle.
Kalim is the most obvious person on the planet with his crush.
He's showering you with expensive gifts, buttering you up like you’re a particularly tasty muffin and following you around like a lost puppy.
Even though he’s doing all that, homeboy will not use his brain cell to deduce he has a crush on you immediately.
As soon as he does figure it out (which bless his heart, might take a bit) he will be dead set on confessing to you, only being stopped by Jamil.
Jamil is putting the brakes on Kalims stunts, but not out of the kindness of his heart.
He knows he can’t directly stop Kalim, so instead he’s going to try to slow him down, and win you over behind everyone’s back.
Jamil is actually good at the art of romancing.
He’ll offer you tasty meals (disguised as leftovers of the things he made for Kalim), to braid your hair.
He’ll even offer really solid advice.
The two problems with all of this are that 1) Kalim will most definitely barge in at every given opportunity and cockblock the hell out of Jamil, and 2) You can very easily misinterpret this as friendly or even as part of his duties.
You and everyone else, that is.
I can’t see anyone figuring out Jamil’s crush on you. He’s one of the most discreet people on campus with his feelings.
And with the added grief of sharing them with Kalim, he’s keeping it under lock and key.
Kalim is going to confess. It’s not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when.
He’s strangely serious about the whole thing, bringing a 24 karat ring, with a red diamond bigger than your finger to prove his love to you.
Jamil is fuming. It’s like a kick to the nuts, and what I see it making him step up his game and basically confess to you as well.
He’d confess in a very roundabout way, the kind of confessing that leaves you wondering if you’re reading too much in between the lines. But remember, this is Jamil! Reading inbetween the lines is a required skill to actually understand this man.
This is such a messy love triangle honestly. If you choose Kalim, it’s going straight to Jamil’s mind chamber of repressed trauma. If you don’t choose Kalim, you’re going to have to deal with Al-Asim tears (he ain’t used to being told no in any capacity), which makes Jamil’s duties more stressful.
For all these reasons, I put this love triangle at S tier. Good luck to you, and my condolences. You aren’t leaving this mess unscathed.
Silver vs Lilia
This one is mostly just sad.
Silver is slow in matters of love. He’d be his normal gentlemanly self, barely changing how he behaves towards you, but to others he becomes lowkey really annoying.
Doing his homework? He's mentioning how he saw you through the window during that class. Sword training? He’s reminiscing on how you complimented his technique. Drinking water? You did say you needed to drink more water, maybe he should remind you.
This would most likely lead to Sebek flipping the fuck out and screaming at Silver to either do something about his crush or shut up.
Silver.exe is loading.
And then he just… nods his head and agrees that he should do something about it.
He’s going to get advice from Lilia, who isn’t exactly a master of seduction but at least has more experience under his belt.
Lilia already knew of Silver's crush, and sadly he also already knew of his own crush on you, but bat dad is dropping all of his potential feelings in favor of his son’s.
He’s telling Silver to bring you flowers, to take you out to dinner, to treat you with kindness and respect, the whole shabang.
And Lilia is always staying in the back, watching his little boy grow up. It does hurt him, but not exactly because of his feelings, more because he feels bad about sharing the object of his affections with his son. He’d never want to hurt his boy nor you.
Only Malleus would know of Lilia’s feelings, although Silver has an inkling that something isn’t right.
Lilia would never tell him, and Silver doesn’t know exactly what’s going on in his dad’s mind, but he definitely suspects that something is going on.
If Silver knew of his fathers feelings for you, he’d immediately stop pursuing you, so bat dad is making sure his son never knows what’s actually bothering him.
Malleus on the other hand knows that Lilia has some sort of feelings for you, but is also keeping it under lock and key at the request of Lilia.
Sebek is the only one fully out of the loop, which leads him to comment things that are really hurtful to Lilia.
Seeing as Lilia is emotionally constipated, he’d bottle it all up and proceed like normal.
When Silver confesses, Lilia feels bittersweet. He’s genuinely happy for his son, but pangs of sadness reverberate through his heart.
He’s downplaying his feelings even to himself.
In terms of rating, this is a D. Lilia just carries Silver on his shoulders and then dumps him in the finish line. It’s not even a proper race.
It’s very depressing, seeing as you will never even know about Lilia’s feelings, while Silver will always have an inkling that there’s something going on with his dad.
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citruslullabies · 24 days ago
Note
Can you do one about Anya, like the Daisuke and Curly posts, please?🙏 They're very good!
Of course sweetheart!!
Anya Mouthwashing headcannons
Trigger warnings!! Miscarriage, Jimmy, obviously if you know the game I'm making subtle hints towards rape, etc etc. read with caution.
Romantic
Pre-crash Anya:
Anya is a very sweet girl honestly
She's not very big on affection - the occasional hug and kiss here and there but she's not very big on touch. Quality time is more her style
All she really needs is to sit next to you quietly, as long as you're there, she feels safe
Especially after what happened with Jimmy. She hates to be alone.
But at the same time she wants to distance herself more
And she hates it
Any time you go in for a hug, she'll flinch
It was any day in space, cold and bland like oatmeal left out on the table. But it felt better almost immediately after you saw her.. the love of your life, Anya. You smile like the sun and walk over, arms wide but.. you watch as she suddenly stops and stares at you. As if you had done something wrong.. her breathing even starts to get faster and she quickly brushes you off and leaves. Leaving you worried and confused.
You can try and try to ask her what's wrong but she isn't sure how you'd react
What if you thought she had cheated on you with her assaulter? She knew many people reacted like that sometimes
She loves you and trusts you, but she needs distance
Much to your dismay, she just suddenly keeps away from everyone one day. Even you.
You long for her little rambles about psychology and medicines
Her quiet humming as you two sit together
It hurts.
Post-crash Anya:
You knew how stressed she was
I mean, how couldn't she be? Everything has gone to shit. Their captain was mutilated on all ends.
And she seemed more afraid than ever.
She started to slowly warm back up to you, but still wouldn't tell you any explanation
No matter how much you begged or pleaded for one
But her time around you seemed different
She was more affectionate than ever before
It was almost like it was a goodbye
She'd always do small things like nudge your hand with hers and give you a weak smile every morning
Almost as if it was a silent goodbye in case she didn't make it through the day
And you finally understood why.
Platonic
Pre-crash Anya:
I imagine you two would be a bit more goofy
If she's not busy, you're just goofing around and making funny faces to make her giggle
You two probably talk about psychology a lot together and your hopes for your futures when you return home
Sometimes she'll let the occasional demented comment slip, but you never paid it much mind
She told you what happened and you were livid
But what could you do about it?? It's not like you could
You had no position of power over Jimmy, the one man who did didn't have enough of a spine to do anything to his friend
All you could do was comfort her
But she slowly but surely drifted further and further away from you, from everybody
And every day you could see her eyes more and more empty
You had noticed her feeling more and more nauseous, cramping more
She was paler
But you assumed it was due to the pregnancy. However you quickly discovered that she took enough painkillers to cause a miscarriage
You supported her and tried to comfort her
But she didn't let you
She wanted to be alone
Post-crash Anya:
After the crash, with responsibilities crashing down on her
She was tired. And you could tell
Her body barely had enough time to recover from her miscarriage before she started to take care of their captain
She was slowly killing herself at this rate
And you couldn't be any more correct.
She just got worse and worse
You swore sometimes you could see her eyes were dead but her body just barely moving
She didn't seem to care anymore
It broke your heart to find her with pills surrounding her.
Atleast your heart wouldn't stay broken for long
Thank you for requesting!!
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eiralunaire · 2 months ago
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Damian Wayne/Reader latina.
Warning:AU soulmates, fluff
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For as long as Damian Wayne can remember, he has lived with the intrigue of the phrase written on his right arm: "Green-eyed moron. You're an pendejo.". He knew what that mark meant, like everyone else in his world: it was the first phrase his soulmate would say to him. What he didn't understand was why, in a universe where soulmates meet with words of love or admiration, his was so insulting, aside from the fact that it had a Mexican word so he assumed his soulmate had Latin ancestry, it wasn't like it bothered him if that was the case. There was no context to help him understand the reason for that sentence, and, with his serious and analytical nature, he had questioned it more times than he was willing to admit.
Over the years, Damian became an expert at dodging that thought. Fighting crime in Gotham, following in the footsteps of the League of Assassins and being trained by the best didn't leave him much time to think about that future connection. But, like everyone who carried the mark, she knew that when she heard it, her life would change forever. An invisible bond, deep and strong, would be created with that person.
On the other hand, Reader had her own mark on her left arm for as long as she could remember: "Watch where you're going, garden gnome.". She couldn't help but laugh every time she read it. A "garden gnome"? Who the hell would say something like that when meeting their soulmate? Sometimes, she joked with her friends about how ridiculous her first interaction with her soulmate would be, but deep down there was always a part of her that wondered when it would happen. The idea that a simple phrase could unite two lives was both exciting and terrifying. And even though she wouldn't admit it, it also generated a certain amount of expectation.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
It was a normal day in Gotham, which meant chaos was the norm. Reader had gone out to run some errands around the city. As she walked, absorbed in her own thoughts, she didn't notice someone coming straight in her direction at a fast pace, dodging the crowd as if it was part of their daily routine. Suddenly, the crash was inevitable.
“Watch where you're going, garden gnome! ”a male voice growled, deeply irritated.
Reader stopped dead in her tracks. Her head whipped around to the source of the voice, her eyes meeting those of the boy who had just spoken to her. Green eyes. Intense, piercing, and clearly annoyed. But that wasn't what stunned her. No, what paralyzed her was the phrase she had just heard. The phrase. That absurd phrase that she had written on her arm since she was a child. Her heart raced, and a feeling of electricity ran through her body, as if something inside her had clicked. There was no doubt: this guy was her soulmate.
But, instead of reacting with surprise or softness, the only thing that came out of her mouth was: “Green-eyed asshole. You're an pendejo.”
Damian stared at her, his features hardening for a split second before his brain processed what he had just heard. That sentence. His sentence. His damn sentence. The one he had seen on his arm his entire life. And there it was, spoken by this stranger, whose voice rang in his ears like a bell he couldn't ignore. He felt the same click, that connection he had heard so much, but had never really believed. An invisible force tied him to her at that very moment.
They both stood there, staring at each other in silence, as if the world around them had disappeared. The words were the indication that they were soulmates, but the bond they felt was deeper, a connection that seemed to have been waiting a lifetime to activate.
Finally, Damian was the first to break the silence, although his tone was still somewhat harsh. “You’re not very nice to your soulmate, are you?”
Reader laughed, a mix of disbelief and relief. “You didn’t start off with the best of phrases either, ‘garden gnome.’”
They both relaxed slightly at the strange situation they found themselves in. It was surreal, and yet so natural. There was something about each other’s presence that fit, as if, despite the bad start, the universe had put everything in its place.
Damian, still a little bewildered, couldn't help but look at her more closely. Despite the accident of the encounter, there was something about her that attracted him in a way unlike anything he had ever experienced before. His always logical and calculating mind was now challenged by the emotional connection he couldn't ignore.
“I suppose this means that... ”Reader began, not quite knowing how to continue.
“That we are soulmates ”Damian finished, nodding slightly.
She looked at him for a moment, still processing the reality of the situation. “I never imagined I would meet my soulmate this way.”
Damian let out a sigh, letting his guard down for a moment. “Neither did I. I thought... it would be different. ”He paused for a second, and then a small sarcastic smile appeared on his face. “Though, to be fair, the sentence made it clear.”
Reader laughed again, and although Damian was not someone who usually showed emotions so openly, he felt that, somehow, he had found a part of himself in her. A part that he didn't know he was missing.
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nadvs · 1 month ago
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out of bounds (part seven) (end)
pairing zach maclaren and soccerplayer! female reader
rating mature 18+ for smut
summary zach has never been the type to rebel, but when he meets you at a soccer camp where you’re both working as counselors, which has a strict policy against dating between staff, he’s tempted to break the rules for the first time.
» part one | two | three | four | five | six
» masterlist
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When you wake up in your cabin the next morning, it’s the first time since you arrived at camp that you wish you were waking up in your own bed back home.
Because after the way everything came crashing down on you yesterday, you don’t want to face what’s waiting for you.
At best, you have three weeks left of the season, of living with Ami after she broke your trust, of dealing with whatever’s going on with Zach if Malcolm’s words on the field didn’t make their way to the directors.
At worst, you and Zach get fired. And if your season really is cut short and you’re kicked out of here, you’re worried he’d only see you as the rule he broke, the girl who played a role in ruining something so important to him.
You check your phone to see the text exchange you had with Zach a few minutes after you left him outside last night. He had texted I’m sorry. You replied me, too.
You’re not sure how to even have this conversation. He was clearly upset with you last night and you can understand why he would be.
But at the same time, you’re uneasy thinking about the night you first told him that Ami knew about you two. He said he was okay with it, and now you’re not so sure, because last night, he texted that all was good, but it seemed like he was anything but good when you ran into him.
Zach had told you he’s not always upfront about when something’s bothering him. You know it’s simply a piece of who he is – it’s not personal. But you can’t rid yourself of the ache in your heart when you realize that even after you’ve shared so much together, you’re no exception. He keeps things from you, too.
You get ready for the day, deeply wishing your secret relationship had stayed secret.
You’re sitting with your campers in the dining hall when Ami approaches your table a few minutes into breakfast.
“Can we talk real quick?” she says quietly, cupping a hand around the inside of your elbow. You nod, following her outside.
“I am so, so, so sorry,” she says once you’re out of earshot from everyone. “I totally get why Zach’s mad and I get if you’re mad, too. I chewed Malcolm out for it first thing this morning for what it’s worth.”
You wish you knew firsthand how Zach is feeling instead of hearing through Ami. You figure she heard through Malcolm, but it hurts that you haven’t spoken to him yet.
“Why’d you tell him?” you say with a disappointed sigh, crossing your arms.
“It honestly slipped out,” she begins. “You know how I told you I thought things were starting to get serious?”
“Yeah.”
“The night before the game, I asked him if he sees anything in the future with us and…” Ami shakes her head, her frown deepening. “He was all like, this is just a fun thing for the summer. But I just kept trying to convince him and then I blurted out you and Zach are planning to stay together, so why couldn’t we?”
She sighs.
“I’m so mad at myself,” she says. “I started this fling with him agreeing it was casual, but I caught feelings and embarrassed myself and told your secret in the process.”
You take a moment, genuinely empathetic of her heartbreak. If Zach had told you he didn’t want to pursue things with you after the season, you’d be gutted.
“I’m sorry he did that,” you say.
“It’s okay. He wasn’t mean or anything. Just honest.”
You nod, figuring as much. You’re not surprised to hear that Zach’s best friend wasn’t unkind about it. Zach wouldn’t be the type to willingly surround himself with mean people.
“I really am sorry,” Ami says. “When I yelled at him about it, he said he knew not to say it loud enough for Ruby or any of the kids to hear.”
“But other counselors were around,” you say.
“That’s what I said,” she sighs. “And I swear, I told him not to tell anyone, but he was like, if any staff take it seriously, I’ll say I was just kidding around. But he apologized and I could tell he felt really bad. Apparently, he’d never seen Zach that upset.”
You look down at the grass, wishing the weight of regret on your shoulders was enough to erase it from ever even happening.
“Are we still friends?” she asks. “I’m so sorry. I’m not usually this dumb, I swear.”
You exhale slowly. You can tell she’s devastated. And what’s done is done.
“You’re not dumb,” you tell her. “I’m convinced there’s something in the air here that makes it hard to keep secrets.”
Ami gives you a grateful smile, chuckling softly, clearly remembering the stories you told her all about the close calls you had with Zach.
“I can get on board with that theory,” she says.
“Do you think Ruby heard? Or if any other counselors took Malcolm seriously?” you ask.
She takes a moment, then shrugs.
“I don’t know,” she admits. “All I remember is being really mad at him. Did she say anything to you or to Zach?”
“Not to me,” you say. “I don’t know about Zach. We only talked for like a minute last night. It was weird.”
“Weird?”
You nod, relieved you can at least find some sort of release with venting to her about this.
“I think he was upset with me, but didn’t want to say so. And I didn’t want to force him to talk, so I left. We said sorry to each other over text. Things just… feel off.”
“Please don’t tell me my big mouth broke up the cutest couple ever,” she says.
“Ever?” you laugh.
“Ever.”
She gives you a quick, appreciative hug before you both have to run back inside.
You meet Zach’s eyes a few times through breakfast. Even though he’s all the way across the big, loud hall, the air between you feels stiff.
Of all the difficult things you’re feeling, the sharp sense of guilt is the most overwhelming. Even though he was the one who took the first step, asking to kiss you that night by the lake, you wish you’d have resisted the temptation.
Because you know that however much anxiety you’re feeling, he’s feeling it a hundred times worse.
When Zach sets out to the pitch after breakfast, surrounded by boisterous kids, he accepts that the hope that he’d feel better after getting some food in him was misguided.
He’s always hated when his thoughts race like this. There’s no clear right answer, no obvious way to fix this. And while he’d like to listen to his impulse to ignore the discomfort, there’s no way to do that.
He knows he needs to talk to you. He’d do anything to fast forward past the serious conversation and get back to how things were.
There’s a very real chance that your relationship has been exposed. It’d be so embarrassing to have to face his aunt and uncle after breaking the one big rule, when he, of all the staff, is supposed to know better.
He’s not sure they’d really even go through firing anyone and would possibly just settle for a warning, but them finding out would be punishment enough for Zach.
He takes the fact that neither Ruby nor Tom have approached him since the game yesterday as a good sign. Plus, Malcolm assured him that whoever heard his words on the field wouldn’t take it seriously. But there’s never a guarantee.
Zach doesn’t like being mad. But he is. At his best friend. At his girlfriend. At himself. He tries to throw himself into work, pretending like the unsettled feeling hanging over him isn’t there.
By the end of the day, you still haven’t had a chance to speak to Zach. And now that you’re even closer to being found out, you’d rather not take the risk of talking in a public place.
So, you check the schedule to see that the next time one of you has an empty cabin is two days from now, when Malcolm is on an overnight shift.
Before dinner, you text Zach: want to talk on thursday night when malcolm’s gone? i think it’s best we have privacy.
He replies: yes. smart.
And then, because he can’t help himself, because he’s afraid he screwed up, he texts: miss you.
The message is a reprieve from the stress you’ve been feeling all day. You respond: miss you, too.
When Friday rolls around, Zach feels like he hasn’t spoken to you in years, instead of just days. He rushes to his cabin after lights out, tidying up like he did the first night you came over.
He’s sure in he’s in the clear because he hasn’t been spoken to by his aunt or uncle. They don’t know. While that is a relief, knowing he’s on shaky ground with you is enough to keep him on edge.
You knock quickly and quietly. Zach opens the door. He can’t help himself. He has to hold you.
You close the door and face him and he wraps his arms around you so suddenly that you let out a startled gasp.
“Hey,” he says hoarsely, nuzzled into your neck. You hug him back.
“Hi.” You breathe in his familiar scent, fresh like the morning breeze. He pulls back to see your brows pinched together, your eyes searching his face. He hates that you look surprised that he’s giving you affection.
“You okay?” he asks.
“Yeah,” you answer on impulse. You shake your head. “Actually, no. I mean, well, we haven’t been fired. That’s good.”
“Yeah. If they knew, they would’ve have said something by now.”
“Right,” you say. You take a deep breath. “But things feel different. With us.”
Zach hates to agree, his lips falling into a small frown. He doesn’t want to do this. He just wants to hold you and kiss you and joke around with you.
“It’s because we had another close call,” he says. “It’s okay. Things are different because we haven’t snuck out to make out in a shed in a while.”
His joke falls flat as you look down at the floor. His hands are still on your waist and when you comfortingly drag yours down to rest on his chest, it slows his thoughts down a little.
“I want you to tell me when you’re not okay,” you mumble when you gaze back up at him.
Zach’s stomach numbs with anxiety. He can feel it rising, the reflex to pretend everything’s fine when it’s not.
“I did,” he says. “I do. Remember the night on the dock?”
You nod. The way he had opened up to you about how he’d struggled with being bullied for being a quiet kid was different. That wasn’t about you.
“I mean I want you to tell me when I’m the reason you’re not okay,” you reply. “I heard from Ami that Malcolm said he’d never seen you so upset.”
“Because I was mad at him,” Zach half-chuckles. “And he’s over-exaggerating.”
It’s not entirely true. The conversation had been the most tense one they’d ever had.
Malcolm was lighthearted about it at first, saying it was a joke and that he was offended that Zach hadn’t told him about how he was breaking rules with you. But once Zach had tersley told him he could have messed everything up for him, Malcolm’s smile disappeared and he apologized profusely.
Zach couldn’t blame him. He’s hardly ever the type be serious. But so much is on the line here.
Confrontation is easier when it’s his best friend of years, but it still isn’t exactly comfortable. So confronting you, a girl he’s helplessly falling in love with, opens the door to an argument and to you deciding he’s too sensitive and not worth the hassle.
“I don’t want to push you,” you tell him, “but I remember you telling me that you get over things on your own and you don’t have to that with me. It’s okay if you’re mad that I told Ami.”
“Baby,” he whispers with a smirk. “What else could you have done? She saw these, right?”
His fingers are featherlight over your collarbone, gently rubbing over the fabric of your shirt. He wonders if the hickeys are still visible.
“I could’ve hidden them better,” you say, “or come up with a lie.”
“I’m not mad at you,” Zach breathes.
A quiet, tense moment passes between you. You’re not convinced.
“Do you promise?��� you ask, eyes doleful.
His smirk fades. At this point, he’d be lying straight to your face if he said yes. Seeing you so sad is gut-wrenching. Being dishonest with you while you’re like this would just be wrong.
“It’s… complicated,” he rasps.
You bite your lip. You’re not upset that he’s mad. You’re upset that you had to pry it out of him. Your hands fall off his chest and you step back, swallowing the tears threatening to fall.
“Can we sit?” he asks softly.
You give in, settling on the edge of his bed. He sits next to you. Watching you like this is making every part of him ache, his mouth going dry.
“When you told me you don’t admit when you’re upset,” you say, “I wondered what’d happen when I did something wrong.”
Zach swallows hard. It sounds like you’ve been on edge since that night you went shopping together, holding onto his words.
“So, what, you’ve been on eggshells since then?” he asks, his tone low and sympathetic.
“No. I just mean that problems are bound to come up and I want us to feel comfortable telling the other when they do.”
You expel a deep sigh, crossing your arms. It’s hard to explain, the sense of instability this has been giving you. You want to be able to take him at his word when he says everything’s okay. Not have to wonder and nag him.
It concerns you if this will be the dynamic in your relationship. Maybe it’s too soon, but you can’t shake away the worry.
Zach nervously threads his hand through his hair. He doesn’t know what to say.
“I shouldn’t have told you,” he mumbles regretfully.
You meet his eyes, lips parted in surprise.
“What?” you say. “You should have told me. I don’t want you to suffer alone.”
“Suffer is a stretch,” he says with a small smile.
Again, you don’t laugh. The tension keeps thickening instead of easing, his heart hurting more instead of feeling lighter.
“Hey,” Zach says, placing a warm hand on your forearm, “listen, I just want us to be good again. We would have lost our jobs by now if they knew. They don’t. We’re fine. You’re still my girlfriend, right?”
“Of course.” You uncross your arms to hold his hand, saddened that he’s wary of the possibility of you giving up on him.
“So, let’s just move past this and enjoy what’s left of the summer.”
“And what happens next time I upset you?” you ask.
“I’ll tell you,” he says. You gaze at him, not sure if you can trust him.
“You will?” you ask.
It’s the first time he’d ever been on the receiving end of a critical look from you. His heart feels like it cracks down the middle.
This was the spark that catalyzed every break-up he’s gone through.
You’re kind of a pushover, Zach.
Why are you so scared of telling the truth?
You’re a nice guy, but you suck at communication.
It reminds him of when he was a kid, ridiculed for not using his voice, or really, not using it the way people wanted him to.
And it’s too much. Things with you were good and easy until you insisted on pulling his uncomfortable feelings out into the open.
Zach sighs your name, a subtle edge in his tone. He keeps his gaze on the floor, lips firming, grip on your hand loosening.
Despite your intentions to understand him, to have an honest conversation, you realize that you’re doing what you tried to avoid. You’re pushing him.
“Okay. Sorry,” you whisper, moving your hand away.
“This is why I don’t say anything,” he admits. “Because now you’re beating yourself up. I’ll be fine. I am fine.”
“Zach, if I hurt you, you deserve an apology,” you tell him. “And you can’t get one if I don’t know what’s going on in your head.”
He runs his fingers through his hair again, wishing he could just go back to how things were a few days ago when you were kissing and touching and laughing together.
He doesn’t reply. He doesn’t know what to say.
You lick your lips before speaking again. Despite everything, you just want to make him feel better and to figure out what’s next.
“Ami didn’t mean to tell him,” you say. “But since other people heard him during the game, I think we should just get through the rest of this season without taking any risks. Does that work for you?”
The sinking feeling of rejection settles deep in him. Avoiding risk means that you want distance again. And this time will be different. He can feel it. Things between you are so obviously tense. You want space from him and not just because it could get you in trouble.
He swallows down the painful lump in his throat, pushing away the hurt.
“Yeah,” he says with a shrug. “If you can resist me.”
Zach meets your eyes with a smile that you know isn’t genuine. You’ve figured out by now that making jokes is his defense mechanism. This time, you let him do what he needs to feel better.
This conversation only broke things down further than fixing them, but even though you’re exasperated, you don’t have it in you to leave him the way you did a few nights ago.
Zach’s muscles lose all their tension when you lean forward, your lips brushing against his. It’s the best reassurance you can give him.
When he kisses back, cradling your face in his hands, your heart hurts a little less. You pull away, staring into his soft blue eyes, surprised how you can mad at someone but also so eager to make them happy.
It’s because it’s Zach. The man who looks out for you, who puts your clothes back on for you after intimacy, who stresses over the very thought of even accidentally hurting you.
After you pull away, he gives you the first genuine smile since you got here. You squeeze his hand before you stand up to leave. He pulls you back for one last kiss.
The following Saturday is the most excited you’ve seen the kids. In the early morning, counselors and campers are set to depart the campground in school buses to a museum that’s currently running a sports science exhibit.
You’ve overheard the vets talk about how field trips are the most exhausting days of the season, but you welcome it. You want the distraction.
After guiding your campers onto your assigned bus, you settle in the first seat behind the driver. Your heart does a flip, somehow both happy and sad, when you realize that the counselor you’re sharing the bus with is Zach, the man you need a distraction from.
His brows raise when he comes up the steps, a smile appearing on his face before he guides kids to fill up the seats. Even though you left things sort of tense, it’s nice that he’s clearly happy to see you.
When he settles on the seat across the aisle from where you’re sitting, he crosses his arms and leans back against the window, biceps bulging under his t-shirt.
“How was the shift?” Zach asks. “The night before a field trip is always a wild card.”
It takes you a moment to realize he looked at the schedule to see you had an overnight shift. Of course he’s checking on you even when you’re not on the best terms.
“Not great,” you admit. One of the girls in your cabin had woken you up after she had a nightmare. You spent a long time calming her down and then had trouble falling back asleep yourself. “I’m thinking I should learn how to do monster checks.”
Zach grins. His heart warms whenever you reference something he’d told you. He loves that you remember his silly little routine with his sister.
“Do I have to teach you everything?” he says with a sigh.
You laugh and fight the impulse to shift over and sit next to him. Despite the fragile state you left things in, you miss touching him.
Throughout the bus ride, you’re both in lively conversation with the campers. You notice that Oliver clings to Zach, talking with other kids but always close to his counselor. He clearly has found comfort in him and of course, Zach shows him nothing but endless patience and kindness.
You can’t forget how he told you Oliver reminds him of himself when he was a kid. It hurts to picture Zach as a kid, shy and reserved, needing to stay close to an authority figure so he doesn’t get made fun of.
He admitted to you how he spent so much of his childhood sad. Somebody so sweet should never have to be sad.
You glance over at him to catch him staring at you.
“Making it obvious?” he says, echoing what you’d texted him when you teased him for the way he looked at you by the campfire many nights ago.
You wish you could go back to when you were still careless, sneaking around, no conflict wedged between you. But you only nod with a chuckle, looking away.
Minutes before you arrive at the museum, Zach stands and gets everyone’s attention. You gaze up at him as he goes through the rules and reminds everyone that they’re representing the camp today.
It gives you a moment to really take him in, your eyes travelling over his hard jaw and tousled hair. He’s easily the kindest, most charming man you’ve ever met.
He makes a joke about how this is his campers’ chance to prove that they’re better listeners than yours. You gasp and stand, encouraging your girls to prove Zach wrong.
Once you plop back down on your seat, you grab one of the granola bars you packed for the kids just to throw it at Zach. He feigns shock when it hits his chest with a light smack.
“That’s not representing our camp well at all,” he scoffs. He looks at the wrapper and smiles before he rips it. “Mixed berry. Nice.”
“Give it back,” you say.
He takes a bite, looking at you with a smirk.
“What? I didn’t hear that,” he says.
You can’t stifle your laugh when you look away. Zach keeps his eyes on you, imagining a world where he doesn’t have to be your boyfriend in secret. But he feels lucky to be your boyfriend at all.
When you arrive at the museum, you direct your campers in a hectic rush. You’re standing by the bathrooms, trying to keep your campers together, when Malcolm passes by.
“Having fun?” he jokes to you over the noise.
You chuckle awkwardly, considering it’s the first time you’ve spoken with him since the staff game. Ami had told you things with her and Malcolm ended amicably, but she’s been keeping her distance, and since you’re usually with her, you haven’t had any chance to talk to him.
“Loads,” you play along, looking out at the sea of kids through the lobby. After a few seconds, he looks around and kneels closer.
“Hey, my bad about everything,” he says. “I didn’t mean to start any drama.”
“It’s okay,” you say quietly, sure he can read the regret on your face.
“I was kidding around,” Malcolm explains. “Nobody would believe he’d actually break the rules. You’re obviously special since he did.”
You know he said it to make you feel better, but it has the opposite effect. Without you here, Zach would’ve had another easy, stress-free season, instead of one full of sneaking around and risking his job and reputation.
“I guess so,” is all you can say with a forced laugh.
When it’s finally time to head back to the buses, you’re exhausted. You make sure all your campers are accounted for and you settle in the front seat, wishing it was more comfortable.
You sit with closed eyes, trying to rest while you can, chatter surrounding you.
Zach sits in the front, smirking to himself when he sees you. Your eyelids flutter open and you look around, adorably disoriented. You meet his gaze.
“I’m just resting my eyes,” you say with a sweet chuckle.
“Take a nap if you want,” he says. “I got this covered.”
You smile gratefully and close your eyes again. His eyes travel over your pretty face, taking you in, missing everything about you. He’s never wanted time to go by quickly this badly.
A few days later, the directors announce that there’ll be a comet passing over the campground next Saturday night, falling right in time with the season’s last fun day.
Tom asks Zach to run an errand into town to buy all the binoculars he can find. And because he’s respecting your wish to stay at a distance, Zach invites Malcolm to go with him instead of you.
It doesn’t take you and another first-year counselor, Theo, long to set up blankets on the grass behind the staff cabins on Saturday night.
You had rushed through your dinner and volunteered to do it. At the end of the day, it’d be nice to get a good reference from your bosses. Theo overheard and offered to help, making conversation as you set up.
When the campers and counselors come out, they settle across the field. Ami stands next to you as your eyes quickly find Zach, who’s handing out binoculars.
“Remember to share,” he says to a few kids close to you. He looks down at you as he passes by. “Hey.”
“Hey,” you say. It’s the first thing you’ve said to each other in a week.
“Get a room already,” Ami mumbles quietly after he leaves.
You snort a laugh. You wish.
Tom stands in front of everyone and shares facts about the comet, pointing to where it’ll be seen in the sky and telling everyone that it’ll be visible by binoculars for a few minutes, so there’s no need to fight over them.
You know the kids well enough to know they’ll still find a way to argue.
Once it’s time to search the skies, you gaze up at the stars on the off chance that you’ll see it without binoculars.
“Any luck?” Theo asks, staring up next to you, his binoculars over his eyes. You hear impressed ohh’s scatter over the crowd. “Whoa,” he says a second later.
“No,” you laugh.
He lowers his binoculars and hands them to you. You thank him and try to find the comet, but you can’t see anything but stars through the lenses.
“I can’t see it,” you tell him sadly.
“Here - can I?” Theo says, his hands hovering over your shoulders.
“Sure.” You let him guide you to adjust your angle, his palms firm on your shoulders.
“I think you need to look just a little higher,” he says. You follow his instructions and then you see it. A bright circle with a pale streak of light following it. It’s beautiful.
“Wow,” you say with a big smile.
Everyone’s gazing up at the sky except for Zach. He’s looking at you smiling while Theo has his hands on your shoulders. Another man is touching his girlfriend and she looks happy while he does it.
He shakes his head to himself as frustrating jealousy squeezes his heart. Staying away from you has been tough, but watching someone else touch you is on another level of agony.
After the comet passes, everyone packs up for the night. The kids are still chatting about how cool the comet was as they make their way to the camper cabins.
Ami leaves your cabin for her overnight shift while you shower. You gaze up at the ceiling as you wash your hair, wondering how you already have only seven sleeps left before the end of the season.
On Saturday, parents are arriving to pick up their children and staff will pack up their things and the season will be over. It’s been a long summer, but you’re happy you came – you made money, rekindled your love for soccer, and best of all, met Zach.
You still haven’t spoken with him about what dating will look like when you’re done here, considering your colleges are an hour apart. But at least you don’t have to worry about getting fired anymore. You’re sure it would have left a mark on your relationship.
You settle on your bed in your pajamas, scrolling on your phone for some downtime. Minutes later, there’s a knock on your door.
It’s Zach. And there’s a fire in his eyes that you haven’t seen before.
“Hi,” you say softly.
“It doesn’t work for me anymore,” he says gruffly.
“What?”
“Not being with you doesn’t work for me anymore.”
You stare at him with parted lips, heat rushing through your body in seconds.
“What do you mean?” you ask.
“Watching another guy get close to you is too much, okay?” he says. “You’re my girlfriend.”
Your brows furrow in confusion, recollecting all that happened since the last time you spoke. He seemed fine when he greeted you earlier tonight. Who got close to you since then?
It comes to you in an instant. Theo helped guide you to spot the comet.
“That wasn’t anything,” you tell him.
“It was to me,” he says, the jealousy still ripping through him. “I don’t care who knows about us. I want him to know.”
It’s like he’s another man, not the Zach you know. His lustful stare and his dominating presence and his possessiveness are making your heart pound. Instead of the tension that’s been following you for the past two weeks, the air between you is electric, full of burning anticipation that you’ve both been trying to avoid.
You don’t care about how things were left. And you know you shouldn’t do this. But you’ve never been good at ignoring your impulses when it comes to him.
“Come in,” you say.
Zach doesn’t need to hear another word. Once the door’s shut behind him, his lips meet yours. You tremble under his hot, hard kiss.
His hands are firm against your jaw, gripping you as if you’ll slip away. Your breaths start to quicken as you kiss deeper, his hands pushing you back towards your bed.
Feeling you again, tasting you is an overwhelming relief. It’s like he’s home again. His body is buzzing, his boxers starting to feel tight already.
You let him guide you on your bed, his commanding frame leaning over as you settle on your back. His mouth trails to your throat, kissing you as you cup the back of his neck.
“I’m yours, okay, baby?” you whisper.
Your words make him moan against your skin, his hips bucking against you. He’s been dreaming about this for too long. Once he’s had you, having to keep you at a distance and act like you’re nothing but coworkers is torture.
Desire takes over you, your hand trailing to feel him over his sweatpants. Simply pressing your palm against his hard bulge makes you involuntarily writhe beneath him.
You’ve never had your mouth on him the way he had his mouth on you and now, you desperately want to please him, to show him how he’s the only one you want.
“I miss you so much,” Zach whines. “I can’t do this anymore.”
“I know. Me, too,” you reassure him. “Lie on your back for me.”
You obeys, letting you perch over him as you kiss him, but he can’t let go of control, not all the way. He pulls your shirt up, a groan of pleasure leaving his mouth when he sees that you’re braless.
You tug your shirt over your head and he roughly pulls you closer by the waist, giving him access to your bare chest, kneading and kissing.
You arch your back, moaning in pleasure as he sucks at your skin. You’re already aching for him, knees growing weak, biting your lip as he tongues you.
It takes all your willpower to pull back, but you shift lower to tug at his sweatpants. He shuffles to let you pull down his pants and boxers in one movement, his cock springing out.
He heatedly takes his shirt off, giving you the view of his naked body that you’ve missed so much.
Zach’s breath hitches when you lean to hold him at his base. Your lips are torturously close to the head of his cock.
“You don’t have to,” he says, his voice thick and hushed. You smile at him. There’s the man you know and love, checking in on you, making sure you’re comfortable.
“I want to,” you say. When you shift to kiss him on his tip, he shudders. This is all he needs, to know you want every part of him, like he wants every part of you.
You swirl your hot tongue over him and he throws his head back in pleasure, eyes squeezing shut. But he wants to watch. He wants to see how you look pleasing him like this.
He meets your eyes as you lock your lips around his length. His head is swimming watching you slowly take him in, pacing yourself, getting his cock wet with your spit.
You pull back with a smack of your lips, stroking him, eyes hard on him.
“Why would I even look at another guy when I have you?” you ask. Zach’s sure he’s never felt this good in his entire life.
You take him in your mouth again, sucking as you start to gently bob up and down. You breathe slowly as you lower to reach his base, quietly gagging when you take him all the way.
Your hot mouth tight around him makes pure euphoria flood his system.
“That’s so good,” he says, strained. “Fuck, baby, that’s so good.”
He lowers his hand to gently lace his fingers through the roots of your hair, applying no pressure, simply just wanting to hold you.
You pull back, your wrist slowly twisting as you pump. The sight of you like this, your lips glossy and your eyes lustful and your fingers wrapped around him, is unlike anything he’s ever experienced.
“You deserve to feel good,” you whisper.
He’s not sure he agrees based on the way he acted the last time you talked in his cabin, but you silence his thoughts when you take him in your mouth again, cheeks hollowing.
Zach’s groans are strained and his breaths are shallow as you suck and lick. The sounds of your mouth against him are near perfection. He knows what’s really perfect is the feeling of being buried deep inside you, both of you wrapped in bliss.
He’s still feeling the flame of jealousy and so badly needs to show you how much you’re his and how much he’s yours. He finds the strength to gently pull your mouth off of him by your roots.
You meet his stare, letting him take full control as he guides you onto your back. The sight of him standing over you, tongue running over his bottom lip as he pulls down your pajama bottoms and panties makes arousal pool in your gut.
Zach leans over, chest heaving and cheeks flushed as one arm holds him up and the other dips between your legs, fingers firmly dragging up and down.
“Tell me only I get to see you like this,” he rasps.
“Only you,” you praise. His touch grants you such elation that you start to feel dizzy. “And only you get to touch me.”
His jaw clenches at your words. He traces circles on your clit, gazing down at you as your breath catches.
“You like how I touch you?” he says.
“Yes,” you moan. “You’re so good at it. You’re so good at everything.”
Zach lowers to kiss you, tongue pressing into your mouth the same moment his finger dips into you. You writhe under his touch, the pressure of his finger inside of you making you moan again.
“More?” he whispers, the pad of his middle finger nudging against your entrance.
“More.”
He slowly sinks a second finger into you, groaning at how tight and wet you are around him. He starts to slowly pump in and out, curling his fingers at the hilt, pulling back just enough to watch your expression.
His movements are slow and firm, and when he starts to rub your clit with his thumb, you clutch his shoulders in deep pleasure.
“Like that,” you whisper. “My good boy.”
The praise makes him feel like he might go insane in the best way. He can’t take the ache anymore. He pulls his fingers out, shifting to grab a condom from your drawer.
You watch him through heavy lids, taking in how perfect every inch of him is, spreading your legs so he can get inside you as soon as possible. Zach lines up against you as he lies over you, his throbbing tip gently pressing against you.
“Ready?” he whispers.
You don’t answer, hungrily gripping the backs of his hips to pull him forward. He groans, in heaven from how much you want him.
He sinks into you completely and it’s a flawless type of pain having to adjust to him so quickly. He pulls back and thrusts back into you hard, lips against yours, mouths open.
You wrap your arms around his shoulders, both of you already sweaty, and you pant together as his slams fill you over and over, jolting you, your bed shaking.
“You’re my good girl,” he whispers through sighs. “Mine only.”
Your moans tangle with his, your soft heat squeezes him, and when you wrap your legs around his hips, he wants to live in the moment forever.
Zach knows he loves you. And he knows he has to wait to say it because he’d hate for you to feel pressured to say it back. If he’s lucky, when it’s time, you’ll say it back.
He grinds against your clit with steady friction and he fills you with hard pressure, pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm.
“I’m gonna…” you breathe, clenching around him. You can’t finish your sentence, losing your voice as you come, sparks firing through your body.
Feeling you flutter around him is what sends him over the edge, kissing you as he unravels, hips stuttering with sloppy thrusts as his body releases all the tension and hunger and love he has for you.
He collapses on top of you, still hard and inside you, leaving soft kisses on the corner of your lips.
When he finds the strength to stand and clean himself up, he comes back to bed with a warm, damp towel, kissing your bent knee as he gently wipes you, letting you stay on your back and come down from your high.
Zach eventually lies down next to you, cradling your jaw, thumb rubbing over your cheekbone as you gaze at each other.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’m sorry things were weird with us. I’m sorry I’m so bad at talking about things sometimes.”
You meet his eyes, gently raking his messy hair back, remembering how it’s the first thing you noticed about him.
“It’s okay,” you say softly. “I’m sorry I pushed. I get if it’s hard for you. I just want us to be honest with each other.”
“I was mad,” he admits. “And I already hate being mad, but being mad at you just felt so wrong. I know you didn’t mean for it to come out.”
“Why do you hate being mad, baby?”
“Because I just… I feel weak.”
“Weak?”
“Like I should be able to change the way I’m thinking about it,” he says. “I should be more understanding.”
You let out a soft giggle, kissing the tip of his nose.
“You’re the most understanding person I know,” you tell him. “You can’t control how you feel.”
“I think I feel too much,” Zach confesses. His heart is pounding again. He’s never been so raw with somebody. But the deep adoration in your eyes makes the vulnerability less scary.
“You feel the perfect amount,” you tell him. “Your heart is big and that’s not a flaw.”
He leans closer, kissing you tenderly.
“Please tell me next time,” you whisper. “What’d you say when I didn’t tell you I was sick? I have to let you know when I don’t feel well? It goes both ways.”
He chuckles and kisses you again.
“I will,” he says. “All I’ve been thinking about is you and how I screwed up and how I don’t want to screw up again.”
“All I’ve been thinking about is you and how I can’t wait to be your girlfriend without having to hide it.”
A bigger smile grows on his lips, his eyes softening at your words. You’re a pure ray of sunshine in his life. For once, he’s confident a girl will stick around when she sees just how messy his head can get.
“How often are we going to be seeing each other when we’re out of here, huh?” you ask. “We have a whole hour between us.”
“The distance from your cabin to mine is already hard enough,” he says. You laugh hard and he realizes just how much he missed the sound. “Every weekend, at least.”
“Deal,” you say. At that moment, your stomach lets out a hungry growl and you sigh a chuckle. “I rushed through dinner and I don’t think I ate enough.”
He sits up, collecting your clothes off the bed. You laugh when you watch him tugging your panties over your ankles.
“What are you doing?”
“We’re sneaking into the kitchen,” he says. “You’re not gonna be hungry on my watch.”
The night air is cool as you make your way towards the dining hall. Sure enough, Zach finds a few snacks in the kitchen cabinets to satiate you, sitting on the counter next to you, chatting about what your class schedules will look like when the school year starts.
You get lost in conversation, and an hour later, you’re both almost dozing off. You decide to finally head to bed, rushing out of the hall and towards the staff cabins, hand in hand.
Your shoes crunch against the gravel path past the campground office so loudly that you almost don’t hear your name called.
You rip your hand out of Zach’s and turn to see one of your campers, Jemma, standing close by.
“Hey,” you say, almost frozen in anxiety. She definitely saw you and Zach holding hands. “Why are you out of your cabin?”
“I woke up,” she says with a shrug. “And I couldn’t fall back asleep so I wondered if I could see any more comets. Were you guys just holding hands?”
You don’t know what to say. You clear your throat and shuffle closer to her.
“I’ll walk you back, okay?” you say. “You’re not supposed to be out at night without a counselor.”
You drop Jemma off, the whole walk over filled with you avoiding her questions and asking her about anything you can think of. Zach is in your cabin get back, his eyes wide.
He said he didn’t care who knew earlier tonight, but you know he was overtaken by his emotions. You can tell by his expression that he’s tense. This is bad.
“She saw us,” he says, almost robotically.
“She saw us,” you confirm. You sit next to him on your bed. You figure you should lay it out on the open. “And she loves to talk. And it’s not appropriate to ask her to keep a secret. She’ll tell her friends.”
“I have to tell my aunt and uncle,” he says, “before they hear from one of the kids.”
You meet his eyes. The happiness you were feeling is deflated now, overtaken by dread. You have to accept that your worst fear just came true.
“We have to tell them,” you say. Tears prick at your eyes. “I’ll go with you. I’m so sorry. This screws everything up for you.”
“No,” he says. “I said you were worth the risk and I meant it. I knew going into it that this could happen. It happened. We’ll deal with it.”
“You’re really okay?” you ask.
“I’m weirdly relieved,” Zach admits, looking at you with empathy. “Are you okay? You could get fired.”
“Your job became more important to me than mine a long time ago,” you tell him. “You have more on the line. That’s why I feel so bad.”
“I’m the happiest I’ve ever been with you. I’d do it all again even if I knew it’d end like this.”
“You’re not going to see me as the girl that ruined this place for you?”
“Baby,” he says with a disbelieving exhale. “Of course not. You’re the best part of this place.”
“Really?”
“One hundred and five percent,” he says with a smile, reminding you of how he’d answered the same way when you asked if he’s sure he wants to start secretly dating.
His sweetness is what makes your tears finally fall. He kisses you softly, shushing you and rubbing your back as you dig your head into his chest. You stay like that until you feel too tired to sit up any longer.
The next day, you and Zach meet at the campground office before breakfast as planned. He’s the most nervous you’ve ever seen him as he turns the handle and enters the room, greeting Ruby as she types at her laptop on a circular table.
“Can we sit for a second?” Zach asks.
“Of course,” she says. “What brings you in?”
You settle next to him at the other end of the table, realizing your knees are bouncing in anxiety. He told you he’d take the lead. You glance at his profile, glad he’s still as calm as he seemed last night.
“We, uh…” He looks at you. “We kind of broke the no dating rule. And last night, Jemma saw us holding hands. I wanted to come to you before you heard from anyone else. I’m sorry.”
“Me, too,” you say, meeting her eyes nervously. “I’m really sorry. And I completely understand if you need to let me go. But please give Zach a little grace.”
“What?” he mumbles. You hadn’t talked about doing this.
“He loves it here,” you tell your boss, the words spilling out of you. “I’m sure you know that already. I’ve never seen someone so passionate about a place. He respects and admires you and Tom so much. The way he talks about this camp and the way he enjoys the job is part of why I’ve grown to love it so much. He’ll be crushed if this ruins his reputation and if he can’t come back to work here. I know I’m in no position to ask for anything, but please spare him.”
“Hey,” Zach says to you softly. He’s so moved that if he didn’t already know he loved you, this would be the moment that sealed it. “It’s okay. I deserve to lose my job.”
“Zach,” Ruby says. You both look at her. “Sweetheart. You really think I didn’t know?”
“What?” you and Zach say in perfect unison.
“I’ve known you all your life,” she says. “I can spot when something’s up with you from a mile away.”
“Wait… what?” he says again. “How? Since when?”
“You’re not one to get mad at the kids for little things. But then we had that barbecue and you,” she says, eyes landing on you, “got hurt because some campers were rough-housing.”
You feel for the now healed burn on your forearm.
“Tom told me all about it, how uncharacteristically angry and worried you got,” Ruby tells Zach, “and then it took less than a day to confirm my suspicions. You really don’t know how obvious you are. You smile like you just won the lottery whenever she’s around.”
You feel your face go hot, butterflies swarming in your stomach. It’s the second time someone’s said Zach seems extra happy around you.
“So, you knew?” he says. “And you didn’t say anything?”
“I didn’t want you to feel embarrassed,” she says with a shrug. “I figured you’d do a good enough job hiding it from everyone. And I’d never fire you. You’re a… what’s Malcolm call it? A nepo baby?”
“Hey,” he says with a relieved laugh.
“Kidding,” she says, eyes darting to you. “I treat all my staff equally. And we’ve never actually fired anyone for dating. We just strongly discourage it because of things like last night. It’s inappropriate if campers see any sort of PDA.”
“We were just holding hands for a second, I swear,” Zach says.
“I know,” she sighs. “But no more cutesy stuff, got it?”
“Got it,” he says. “So we’re not fired?”
“Just go to breakfast and let me enjoy my coffee,” she says with a small smile.
“Thank you,” you say quietly.
As you and Zach head out, Ruby calls him back for a moment. You wait outside for him to make sure everything’s okay.
Zach closes the door behind him, expecting a verbal lashing.
“I like her for you,” Ruby says. He beams, unbelievably relieved.
“You’re really not disappointed?” he asks. He should have known his kind-hearted aunt would be so compassionate.
“Honey, I’m happy,” Ruby says. “Even you need to break rules sometimes. You must really like her if you decided to stop being a goody two-shoes for once.”
“I do,” he says confidently. “And I am not a goody two-shoes.”
“Debatable,” she teases.
When he steps out of the office, you share a sigh of relief, laughing.
“What’d she say?” you ask.
“Changed her mind. I am, in fact, fired.”
You scoff, nudging his shoulder.
“Hey, no touching allowed,” Zach laughs. “Save it for after lights out.”
“Shh,” you laugh, looking around in case anyone heard. “Have you learned nothing?”
He smirks at you.
“Thanks for saying that stuff about me back there,” he says.
“It’s all true,” you reply.
The last week of camp is the fastest of them all. Gossip spreads about you and Zach, but you just deny it whenever kids bring it up, both saying you’re just friends.
Packing up your cabin and saying goodbye at the end of the season is one of the hardest things you’ve done all summer.
Two Months Later
The triple whistle blow signals the end of the game. You’re absolutely spent, hands on your knees, so tired that you can’t even celebrate that you’d just beat an unbeatable team.
Last year, they beat you every single time, but now, you look up at the scoreboard to see your score at 3, and the visitors’ score at 2. Soon enough, your teammates pull you into a hug, the air buzzing with pride and excitement.
The hot shower you take in the locker room after the game is unbelievably rewarding.
You beam when you see Zach standing by the stadium front doors. His face lights up the moment he sees you.
“You were amazing,” he says, pulling you in for a hug and taking your heavy duffle bag for you as the crowds exiting the building surround you. “Did you hear the crowd when you nailed that one tackle in the second half? I was so proud that I told the guy beside me that you’re my girlfriend.”
You laugh, perching up on your toes to quickly kiss him.
“And what’d he say?” you ask.
“He just looked at me like this,” he says, pulling an annoyed expression. You laugh again. “Baby, you killed it. Best defense I’ve ever seen.”
“Now you’re pushing it,” you chuckle.
“I’m serious,” he says. “You’re amazing. Who’d you train with? Obviously a pro.”
“Alright,” you roll your eyes, smiling.
“I mean it. And five.”
You lace your fingers in his, grinning. The more you opened up to each other, learning about how hard it can be for Zach to express his difficult emotions, ‘and five’ became your way to assure each other you mean what you’re saying, a silly reference to how he loves to say ‘one hundred and five percent.’
‘And five’ is your way of saying you promise. That you’re sure. That there’s no reason to doubt anything.
“Wow, and five?” you say. “So, you’re not just trying to flatter me before dinner.”
Zach grins, pulling you in for a hug. You’re set to go to his house to meet his family after you get ready in your dorm.
“You’re sure you’re not too tired?” he asks.
“I don’t care how tired I am,” you say. “I can’t wait to meet them. And seeing Tom and Ruby again will be nice.”
The MacLarens’ house is warm and welcoming, just as you expected. You feel like you already know his parents and sister within minutes and when Zach’s aunt and uncle arrive, it’s comforting to see them, knowing they already like you.
Throughout dinner, Tom and Ruby tease Zach for how obviously lovestruck he was at work all summer. Even his sister joins in, calling him cheesy.
“I hope you know we’re all just joking, sweetie,” Zach’s mother says to you quietly, clearly a bit worried you’ll think they’re being too harsh on your boyfriend.
“I do,” you say kindly. In the time you’ve been together, you’ve joked with Zach that teasing seems to be his love language. It’s sweet seeing him at home, joking with his family, looking up at you every so often to make sure you’re having a good time.
After you say your goodbyes, Zach drives you to your dorm. He pulls up to your building, the back of your hand warm from where he’s been resting his palm.
Every time you’re in his car, you think about the first time you were in it back in the summer, going into town, getting to know him. You’ve been in it so many times since then, driving around and playing your favorite songs.
“Well, thank you again,” you say, relieved to have heard he knows his family loved you, just as he suspected. “I had fun.”
“You fit right in,” Zach says. He hopes it’s not too much, but the longer he’s been with you, the less scared he is of being too much.
You smile at him, proving him right. He doesn’t have to hold back.
“I was thinking something,” he says, “when I was looking at you at dinner.”
“What?”
“That I always knew that things between us didn’t go so fast because of the whole forbidden thing,” he tells you. “They’d go that fast anyway. For me, at least.”
You smile, relieved to hear it. You spent so much of the camp season wondering if the rule you were both living under was the reason things escalated the way they did.
You’ve talked about the summer, reminiscing on your memories, laughing over your favorite moments, finding it hilarious how stressed you both were about the bosses finding out about you when they already knew, but you never dove into how fast your relationship went.
“You have no idea how nice it is to hear that,” you say. “I agree. I would’ve been just as crazy about you if we met outside of work.”
“Me, too,” he says, his dimples caving into his cheeks as he gazes at you. He takes a deep breath, bringing your hand up to his mouth, kissing your palm. “I love you. And you don’t have to say it back, but I just want you to know.”
“I love you, too,” you say, feeling weightless. “Obviously.”
“Yeah?” Zach doesn’t know when his heart started pounding this hard, but it’s thudding in his ears.
“Yeah,” you say. “And five.”
He leans close and kisses you over and over, just like he did the first night on the dock.
But this time, instead of saying that you should stop and that this isn’t allowed and that you could get in trouble every time your lips part, you’re whispering that you love each other.
(the end)
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yurimother · 25 days ago
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Disability Yuri Romance 'The Moon on a Rainy Night' Anime Adaptation Rumored
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On Sunday, rumors about an anime adaptation of Kuzushiro's high school Yuri drama series The Moon on a Rainy Night (Amayo no Tsuki) emerged online. These rumors come only days after the domain for a potential website, amayonotsuki.jp, was first registered on October 24th.
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Notable anime leaker Sugoi LITE also corroborated the rumors on X (formerly Twitter).
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Kodansha USA, which has published the series in English since September 2023, describes the manga:
One rainy night, Saki is rushing to a piano lesson when she crashes into a beautiful, long-haired girl, dropping her sheet music in the process. Saki stutters an apology, but the girl simply hands back her sheet music and leaves without a word. Saki begins her first day of high school the following morning, only to find the stranger from the night before sitting at the desk next to hers. She learns that the girl’s name is Kanon and that she is not quite completely deaf, but very hard of hearing. Though Kanon needs to be close to people to read their lips, she tends to push people away with her icy demeanor. Through one kind gesture, Saki slowly begins breaking down the walls around Kanon, even as she feels something new blossoming within her.
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The Moon on a Rainy Night has received positive reviews from critics and has been published in over 20 countries. Erica Friedman of Okazu described the first English volume as "a Yuri series that can and should be read by everyone." The series is celebrated for its characters, story, and disability representation. It was also nominated in the Next Manga Awards web category in 2022 and 2023.
The manga began serialization on Comic Days in June 2021, and upon release, it ranked first in the site's "original" category. Kodansha released the seventh collected volume in Japanese in June 2024, the same month that Kodansha USA released the fifth English volume.
Kevin Steinbach translates the manga into English, with lettering by Jamil Stewart.
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You can check out The Moon on a Rainy Night manga in English digitally and in paperback today: https://amzn.to/3NGhCiP
YuriMother makes a small affiliate commission from sales to help fund future coverage.
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sol-consort · 10 months ago
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Two years dead and everyone arounds you act as if it was your fault, as if you coming back to life disrupted their mourning.
And I get i, I get it. But to Shepard, it was only a few weeks. They were lost in space in anguish from the pain of choking as their lungs burned. The vacuum of space sucking whatever life left out of their beating heart as their final moment before their eyes closed.
Then they open them and find themselves on a medical bed. Two years passed in a blink, a second to them. Their body is the same, except for a few missing scars. Everything about them is the exact same as if they were plucked out of space during that moment and thrown two years ahead into the future.
But everyone else has changed, moved on. And no one wants to explain themselves, close friends treating them like strangers, news mentioning their name as one of the past legends, left to collect dust in the history books and memorials.
Like crashing their own funeral just when everyone else was done crying, and people feel upset at you for somehow beating the odds and surviving. Then it's Immediately back to duty, you don't even get to announce the fact you're alive again publicly. It gets spread in rumours and witness accounts.
And no one acknowledge how lonely it must have been to die surrounded by friends, knowing at least you died for them to survive. Only to wake up alone and remain alone, for everyone you've known died, or changed beyond recognition.
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