#and the previous Lord is 2000+

[pargolettasworld]

So, because I am incurably, morbidly curious, I watched Jessie Gender's four-hour-and-seventeen-minute-long video on . . . well, the title suggests "Zionism, Antisemitism, and the Left." To her credit, Gender does touch on all three of these topics, though not with the same degree of skill, graciousness, or understanding of the topics at hand. I've just had a very nice dinner, and I'm feeling generous, so let's see how this video stacks up. Strap in. This is going to get long.

I should admit right off the bat that I'm only a casual, occasional watcher of Jessie Gender. I'm not a deep fan, and I'm sure there is Jessie Gender Lore™ out there that I'm not aware of, but I think I've seen enough of her videos to get a general sense of her house style. This video hits a lot of the hallmarks of her style. She speaks very fast and very passionately, occasionally trips over her own words (something that I've done many a time, so I really do feel that), and is inordinately fond of nominalizations. She's especially fond of the word "ostracization," for some reason, which drives me nuts because "ostracism" is right there. So, in style, it appears to hew to the Jessie Gender House Style pretty well.

On to the video itself. The first thing I will observe about it is that it is in every possible way a meeting that could have been an email. There was no need for this to be the same length as the Extended Edition of The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003). There's a lot of padding, significant digressions, and a certain degree of repetition. It's easy to forget the beginning of the video by the time you're an hour into the thing.

The major question that hangs over this opus is: Why, and for whom, was it made? I'm honestly not sure who the intended audience for this thing is, nor why Gender felt that she had to make it. She alludes in the first half hour to feeling like she's lost the trust and support of some of her Jewish fans/friends/acquaintances/Patreon patrons, and she chalks it up to a previous video that she made (which I have not seen, and which I am not inclined to seek out). But neither the structure nor the thesis nor the conclusion of the video seem like they would win back any of these folks.

I don't think that Jewish viewers are her intended audience -- certainly not with the way she talks about Jews throughout the video. I'm also having a hard time believing that really committed leftists are her audience, either, since I don't think she's really saying much that leftists haven't already heard, or offering new perspectives on her topic(s). And anyone who has made it this far into the year of 5784 and is still undecided about the contemporary iteration of The Jewish Question is probably not going to be interested in sitting through nearly four and a half hours of relentless lecture. So I'm still left wondering why, and for whom, did Jessie Gender make this video?

Gender assures us, her viewers, of several things that are meant to be reassuring. She's done lots and lots of research, for one thing. And she's asked some-of-her-best-friends-who-are-Jewish to be sensitivity readers. We're given to understand that we are hearing the nitpicked, edited, and polished version of the script. I'd hate to see what the first draft looked like . . .

She also tells us that there are going to be lots of Foreign Words And Names, and that she and her mouth-hole have A Hard Time pronouncing Foreign Words And Names. Her loyal staff have made her a pronunciation guide -- which appears to have been used perhaps as a drinks coaster, since there are some howlers here. The Jews originating from the MENA regions are the "Misrai" (Mizrahi) Jews, the first Prime Minister of Israel was "David Ben-Gron" (David Ben-Gurion), the Revisionist Zionist leader was "Zeeeeeeeeev Zarbinsky" (Ze'ev Jabotinsky), and the Palestinian uprisings of 1987 - 1993 and 2000 - 2005 go by the name "Infitada" (Intifada).

You know that phrase "If white people can learn to say Tchaikovsky and Schwarzenegger, they can learn to say [your name from an African or Asian language]?" I agree completely with the conclusion, but I question the premise. Jessie Gender makes me question the premise harder. If she had any real interest in the topic, she would have practiced those names, but I don't think she does, so she didn't.

Moving on to the actual content of the video. It's . . . weird. Jessie Gender begins the video believing that Zionism is an evil force for colonialism, White supremacy, oppression, and genocide. She ends the video believing that Zionism is an evil force for colonialism, White supremacy, oppression, and genocide. But along the way, she's confronted with quite a lot of inconvenient facts that threaten to complicate this perspective.

Gender devotes roughly two hours and fifteen minutes of her video, a smidge over half of the runtime, on three segments that offer a history of Zionism, the iterations of Zionism as a political ideology, and what she calls "Zionism as emotion," which is a condescending way to refer to the importance of Zionism to Jews. I'd guess that her research for these segments might have surprised her. It turns out, per Jessie Gender, that there is both a reason behind and a context for nineteenth-century Zionism, quite a lot of logic behind why the Jews wanted to go to Israel, and ample evidence that a majority of Jews have some kind of stake in both Israel and some variation of Zionism.

The reason I think that this research might have surprised her is that she ends each of these segments with a small diatribe about the evil colonialist, capitalist, oppressive, genocidal force that is Zionism, even as the segments suggest nuance, logic, and reason behind the philosophy. We can't have that on a good lefty video, though, can we? The more Gender confronts evidence that there is more to Zionism than meets her eyes, the more she doubles down, digs in her heels, and refuses to accept even the barest shreds of non-negativity about Zionism. Every now and then, she comes up with a lovely sentence or two that shows some understanding of a Jewish perspective on the world, but then furiously backpedals -- we mustn't forget that this Jewish perspective of oppression, mass murder, and international blame has only led to the Evil Of Zionism, after all.

What's really fascinating is how hard she works to avoid blaming actual Jews for all of this evil. I think she's doing this with the best of intentions. A for effort. C for effect. She wants to make a distinction between "Zionism" and "Judaism," in the sense of "Zionism does not equate to Judaism, so being antisemitic to Judaism because you hate Zionism is bad." She tries so hard that she loses sight of the actual people involved. There are a lot of places where she talks about "Judaism" where what she actually means is "the Jews." Or, as she calls us, "Jewish people." Which isn't bad, and it isn't really wrong, but it doesn't quite communicate the sense of Am Yisrael that is at the heart of Zionism.

In fact, she's so desperate to separate Zionism from Jewish people that she starts to talk about it almost as an individual character in the story, with agency, desires, wishes, and goals of its own, totally disconnected from the people who created it. Zionism demands the genocide of Palestinians, Zionism needs colonialism, Zionism has a nice lunch date with neoliberalism and spends the afternoon browsing department stores with capitalism. In effect, Zionism becomes the dragon, and Gender really wishes that the passive, easily-led Jewish people would unite behind some White Knight and slay the dragon so everyone could be happy and free and leftist. Despite the two hours she spent on her deep dive into the history and meaning of Zionism, she cannot fathom why the Jewish people don't just do this.

I said earlier that quite a lot of this video consists of padding. Gender identifies herself as a lefty anarchist, opposed to nation-states, capitalism, neoliberalism, the United States, the British Empire, Israel, Joe Biden, "Ka-MAH-la" Harris, transphobia in Western societies . . . the usual suspects. Frequently, especially in the back half of the video, she'll wander off into long fantasias about the crimes against liberty perpetrated by the West at large, as well as their character Capitalism, and then remember that this is supposed to be a video about Zionism, and then finish with the equivalent of "Peter Rabbit did sort of that kind of thing, too."

One of the alleged purposes of this video is to discuss Antisemitism On The Left, but Gender . . . pretty much elides doing that. She gets close a couple of times, and she does grudgingly admit that some leftists coming from some branches of leftism might sometimes say things that might be antisemitic, and that's Bad, and it makes Jewish people feel Unsafe and Not Inclined To Agree With Leftists that The Dragon Known As Zionism Must Be Slain Heroically. But don't stress about it. The important thing is that Israel Must Stop Its Genocide and Palestinians Should Have Self-Determination (which is only withheld from them by Israel -- excuse me, by Zionism -- and certainly not by those eminently-justified-if-a-little-uncouth plucky fighters, Hamas.

There are quite a lot of lengthy quotes from Sources, read by guest stars, which is a nice touch to break up the video. The vast majority of these Sources -- especially the ones in the "history of Zionism" segment -- are not actually written by Zionists. You get a lot of academic pontificating about the failures, shortcomings, and nefarious activities of Zionism, but you hear almost nothing from actual Zionists, especially contemporary Zionists. This does not look nearly as good or as well-researched as it's meant to look.

So what do we get in the end, after four hours and seventeen minutes of watching this? Honestly . . . not much. Gender gives enough background on the history of Zionism, antisemitism, and Jewish attitudes toward Israel that hardcore leftists watching will be more annoyed than convinced. She condescends to both Jews and Arabs, mentioning repeatedly that she, as a White Gentile, really doesn't have any business butting in on these complex questions -- but that's not going to stop her from butting in like the lefty shiksa she is! She's too mealy-mouthed to come right out and say anything blatantly antisemitic, but disdain for Jewish concepts of homeland, belonging, origin, and self-determination pervade the whole thing.

I don't think that Jessie Gender is an idiot -- she seems to be pretty smart, and has both a firm sense of her own political philosophy and the stick-to-it-ive-ness to do far more research into things like the development of Zionism and the history of antisemitism than one might expect. But the video really is, to bring up a playwright from the hated West, "full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

[magical-grrrl-mavis]

There have been 82 Doctors at this point!

Keep reading line because the list is so damn long.

Main Continuum

(In order of appearance)

Classic Who

First Doctor (William Hartnell 1963 – 1966, Richard Hurdnall 1983, David Bradley 2017, 2022)

Second Doctor (Patrick Troughton 1966 – 1969)

Third Doctor (John Pertwee 1970 – 1974)

Fourth Doctor (Tom Baker 1974 – 1981)

Fifth Doctor (Peter Davidson 1981 – 1984)

Sixth Doctor (Colin Baker 1984 – 1986)

Seventh Doctor (Sylvester McCoy 1987 – 1989)

Eighth Doctor (Paul McGann 1996 movie)

Nu Who

Ninth Doctor (Christopher Eccleston 2005)

Tenth Doctor (David Tennant 2005 – 2010)

Eleventh Doctor (Matt Smith 2010 – 2013)

The War Doctor (John Hurt 2013)

Twelfth Doctor (Peter Capaldi 2013 – 2017)

Thirteenth Doctor (Jodie Whittaker 2017 – 2022)

Fourteenth Doctor (David Tennant 2023)

Fifteenth Doctor (Ncutu Gatwa 2023 - ?)

Pre - Memory Doctors

(Timeless child my beloathed)

Morbius Doctors (Robert Holmes, Graeme Harper, Douglas Camfield, Philip Hinchcliffe, Christopher Baker, Robert Banks Stewart, George Gallaccio and Christopher Barry 1976)

The Other (Sylvester McCoy, 1990)

The Fugitive Doctor (Jo Martin 2020)

The Timeless Child(ren) (TBA, Grace Nettle, Leo Tang, Jac Jones, TBA, Jesse Deyi 2020)

Brendan (Evan McCabe 2020)

Possible Future Doctors

(italicized parts of names are the title of that Doctor's first appearance, if I can't find a better name)

Father of Time (No Actor, 1987)

"Merlin" or The Battlefield Doctor (No actor, 1991)

The Army of Shadows Doctor (No actor, 1991)

"Fred" (No actor, 1993)

The Relic (no actor 1997, 2002)

The Storytelling Doctor (Tom Baker 1999)

The Web of Caves Future Doctor (Mark Gatiss, 1999)

The Blue Angel Future Doctor (No Actor, 1999)

The Curator 1 (Tom Baker, 2013)

The Curator 2 (Collin Baker, 2022)

Pseudo-Doctors

The Watcher (Adrian Gibbs 1981)

The Valyard (Michael Jayston 1986)

The Obverse Eight Doctor (No actor, 1999)

The Metacrisis Doctor (David Tennant 2008)

The DoctorDonna (Catherine Tait 2008)

The Dream Lord (Tony Jones 2010)

The Ganger Doctor (Matt Smith 2011)

The Spriggan (David Tennant 2022)

Alternate Realities

Dalek Films

Dr. Who (Peter Cushing 1965, 1966)

The Inferno Universe

The Leader (Jack Kine, 1970)

Doctor Who and the Daleks in Seven Keys to Doomsday

The Doctor (Trevor Martin 1974)

Previous Doctor (Nocholas Briggs 2008)

The Lenny Henry Show

The Seventh Doctor (Lenny Henry 1986)

What If?

The Eighth Doctor (No actor, 1997)

The Infinity Doctors

The Infinity Doctor (No actor, 1998)

The Curse of Fatal Death

The Doctor (Rowan Atkinsen 1999)

The Quite Handsom Doctor (Richard E Grant 1999)

The Shy Doctor (Jim Briadbent 1999)

The Handsom Doctor (Hugh Grant 1999)

The Female Doctor (Joanna Lumley 1999)

The Chronicles of Doctor Who?

The Doctor (no actor, 2000)

Klein's Story

Johann Schmidt (Paul McGann, 2010)

Father Time

The Emperor (No actor, 2001)

Scream of the Shalka

The 9th Doctor (Richard E Grant 2003)

Doctor Who Unbound

The Doctor (Geoffrey Bayldon 2003)

The Unbound Doctor (David Warner 2003)

The Heartless Doctor (David Collings 2003)

The New Heartless Doctor (Ian Brooker 2003)

Martin Bannister (Derek Jacobi 2003)

The Victorious Valyard (Michael Jayston 2003)

The Previous Doctor (Nicholas Briggs 2003)

The Exile Doctor (Arabella Weir 2003)

The Warrior (Collin Baker 2022)

Gallifrey - Disassembled

Lord Burner (Collin Baker 2011)

Gallifrey - Regenerators

Commentater Theta Sigma (Collin Baker, 2011)

False Negative

The Doctor (No actor, 2017)

The People Made of Smoke

The Sixth Doctor (Dan Starkey, 2020)

Unspecified Doctors

Yeah sometimes they just say "The Doctor" and don't bother specifying...

The Cabinet of Light Doctor (No Actor, 2003)

The Dalek Factor Doctor (No actor, 2004)

[babybells123]

I recently posted about Sansa Stark on TikTok particularly concerning themes of beauty, love and romanticism (Jonsa if you SQUINT)!! It’s gotten over 2000 likes so far, and the comments have all been positive, but I just received a comment saying “Aegon VI will save her” and had to resist the urge to scratch my eyes out …

Look, I for one want nothing more than for Sansa to be with a man who loves her undoubtedly (and chooses her over her claim, countering all the previous men who have been betrothed to/married to/attempted to abuse Sansa). But I find it incredibly ironic that this is likely an individual who is aware of the Ashford Tourney (hell, maybe they’re even aware of the really subtle Targaryen imagery in Sansa’a chapters - but only if they’re in conjunction with Aegon VI, certainly not the secret cousin who just so happens to also be a Targaryen)… but I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they are an alt shift x fan who has watched his brief Ashford Tourney video which barely scratches the surface of the theory (and I too, enjoy Alt’s videos so don’t get me wrong here) but here’s what bothers me - why is the fandom so incredibly intent on ‘proving’ that it is Aegon?

He could be the loveliest, kindest man alive and I still wouldn’t budge on my stance of this marriage doing absolutely nothing to progress Sansa’s narrative arc organically.

How does it challenge her belief of conventionality? Particularly concerning southern ideals of beauty? What is the whole point of Sansa retracting from her current journey, travelling South yet again to marry a man whom she’s never met before? We’ve already been made privy to how wary Sansa is of Harry the Heir, for he could be a “comely monster,” she knows that beauty is deceptive - so already she’d be experiencing those similar feelings of despair … What purpose would it serve to send Sansa back to King’s Landing? A place where she was abused and married against her will? The place where her father was murdered in front of her eyes? The place where she was hostage with no true friends and no family to trust or rely on? Walking on eggshells every day of her life? These are all negative associations. Anyone with eyes and a brain can see that Sansa’a arc is pointing North.

This is the same girl who spends hours building a scale model of her home, Winterfell - in the snow. This is the same girl who refers to herself as the blood of Winterfell, the daughter of Lord Eddard and Lady Catelyn - who derives strength from that in the face of her abuser. This is the same girl who at the age of 11, manages to dissociate when faced with the head of her father on a spike, looking North and North until she can see Winterfell in her mind’s eye, whose direwolf - part of her soul, is buried in the North ; who to quote Ned “belongs in the North.” This is the same girl who has been passed around like a vessel of politics since her very first betrothal. Who has been viewed as nothing more than a claim to a vast Kingdom, who is not allowed to exercise that claim in her own right. Who has been denied her inheritance on the basis of her marriage to Tyrion - not just by Stannis , but also by the brother she has loved and idolised (and isn’t that just heartbreaking for Sansa?) - need I remind you of the one single person in this entire series who has not overhauled Sansa’s claim ? Despite it being the one thing he’s ever truly wanted? His hearts most intrinsic desire??

“By right Winterfell should go to my sister Sansa." (Jon I ADWD)

“Jon said, "Winterfell belongs to my sister Sansa." (Jon IV ADWD).

I mean, those two phrases in conjunction with;

“It is not me she wants her son to marry, it is my claim. No one will ever marry me for love.” (Sansa VI ASOS) - which as we know, is followed by a Jon chapter just a page later.

Jon has already unknowingly refuted half of Sansa’s despairing words, as well as silently fulfilling those knightly ideals she believes no longer exist.

So yeah, it annoys me beyond belief when people “theorise” that Sansa will marry Aegon VI/Young Griff. Because it removes her agency yet again, it pushes her further away from her identity and her home that she has slowly but surely been reclaiming - she goes five steps backwards, and regardless of whether you like her character or not, from a writing perspective and how character arcs are meant to unfold - it really doesn’t make sense for her to go back to the place where she has been tormented for most of the series - but then, who am I kidding - these are the same people who don’t believe sansa is an important character and that her arc will either remain stagnant or she’ll just be pushed out of the way whilst other characters are allowed narratively conclusive endings.

But even with all this, even with Valarr Targaryen being a non-Targaryen looking prince with brown hair described as a black prince with a white guardian (gee, I wonder whose image THAT invokes), even with GRRM sitting down and writing a family tree where a Jonnel ‘One Eye’ Stark marries a half niece called Sansa Stark to solve a succession crisis. Quite literally spelling it out on paper for people this fandom just cannot come to any logical conclusions that would make sense narratively, thematically, politically and on a character level. It truly blows my mind.

*sigh.* I’m very tired.

Anyway, to quote GRRM; resolve to be Sansa Stark and take the North. ✌️

[allastoredeer]

manlyman al/uwu lucifer, buff al/skinny lucifer, lucifer in a drag with al dressed in a suit - all the same crap, it's also very noticeable how much of luci in dress with al in a suit there is and how little the other way around or when they both in dresses and also luci in dress? 10000+ likes, while rare alastor in dress? well, barely 1000 or 2000. Same with any reverse of usual fandom versions of them. Very telling if you ask me. Blond, short, goofy, did a sad face few times? Of course it's the one who's we gonna make a girly girl here and there's can be only one in our mlm ship 🙄 People want fanon charlastor but without charlie in it because she's actually a female

Damn, you came in swinging.

But, like...I see no lies here. It is kind of funny that people put Lucifer in dresses more than Alastor when Alastor literally wore a nun outfit in the show. It's such a shame too because with Al's long legs and slim waist, DAMN he'd look so good in dresses.

It is very telling that in every fandom space, with at least one pairing - usually a very popular one - one of two becomes a girly girl and the other a darker, menacing, and more intimidating manly man. There's nothing wrong with feminine male characters, nor them being in mlm relationship, but when it happens to every. Single. Ship. where the characters are stripped down to basic archetypes.... ಠ_ಠ

It really is funny, because going by what we've seen in the show, Alastor is so much more of a girly pop than Lucifer is. Him and all his little wrist flicks and sassy remarks.

I mean

Look at this guy

Look at him

LOOK AT HIM

LOOOOOOK AT HIMMMMMMMM

How can people see this man as a super serious big bad muscle daddy? I don't understand. He's so unserious. So full of whimsy. He's a clowning troll. And I'm telling you, look at that thin waist and those long legs. He'd look amazing in a dress.

This actually reminds me of a previous ask I got a while back. The topic was centered around some fans saying that Alastor would never bottom and the over all characterizations of him and Lucifer, and this line here sums it up perfectly:

"shows such a patriarchal-ly drenched heterosexual view of sex, that they then apply to a MLM ship that drives me INSANE."

Particularly, the drenched in a patriarchally heterosexual view. Having one man in a mlm relationship be more feminine than the other is totally okay, there is nothing wrong with that, and there are a lot gay relationships like that.

But the way a lot of radioapple is depicted feels weirdly heterosexual, and it's because of the behaviors and archetypes that get assigned to them. Lucifer becomes this teeny tiny, wide-eyed, awkward little waif and Alastor this big dark possessive boyfriend who's always looming over his shoulder and glaring at anyone who looks at Lucifer. It reads like every other cringy straight romance I've read. Add in the trope of Alastor drinking Lucifer's blood and it's basically "Twilight" set in Hell.

Okay, not to derail, but there was this one AU that I was obsessed with. It's a Hades/Peresphone AU for radioapple, and it sounded amazing, but there were so many depictions of Alastor as Hades and Lucifer as Persephone and I was just...

I was flabbergasted.

You have Lucifer, the king of Hell, the DEVIL himself, be the goddess of spring instead of the Lord of the Underworld. I'm....whut?!!?!?! Alastor is literally a deer, he would be perfect to play Persephone. That guy would be hunting down all the people poaching and harming his domain and making them suffer, and I can totally see Niffty as a psycho little nymph that tags along on his "hunting trips."

I've seen one or two au's where Alastor is Persephone and Lucifer is Hades, and they are glorious, but every time I see the opposite I feel like I'm taking psychic damage. A year of my life gets taken away. I fear I'll be on my death bed soon.

Also this line "People want fanon charlastor but without charlie in it because she's actually a female" it's so true to fandom it hurts, but it's so fucking funny, I'm wheezing

You ate with this ask 🤌

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

Here’s a concept for a possible Earth Avatar series. Taking place in the Avatar equivalent of either the 1990s/2000s, we follow Earth Avatar Kazuya in his journey to maintain the balance in the world, as per his Avatar duties. However, the twist in this show is the way we’re supposed to view Kazuya.

Aang was clearly the one who we’re supposed to root for in his show. Korra, say what you will about how successful the show was in its attempt at more grey morality, but she was clearly supposed to be who we were rooting for. Kazuya, it’s up to the viewer whether they want to root for him or not.

The reason is that even though he’s “maintaining the balance”, he’s a lot colder and less empathetic. He views any sort of conflict as disrupting the balance and will side against the ones causing the disruption. Even if the troublemakers are the more sympathetic/righteous side, Kazuya views them as the threat.

Basically, this hypothetical Earth Avatar series explores an Avatar who judges people on a binary/black-and-white lens. He views maintaining the balance as maintaining the current world order, thus he views any attempt to disrupt the world order as a threat that he needs to shut down. So in his quest to maintain the balance, he ends up alienating the public that he’s supposed to protect. The show also explores what it means to maintain the balance, especially if the current world order that the Avatar is trying to maintain is corrupt to the core.

Examples of how the show could explore this concept:

1) Kazuya shutting down protests against the current Fire Lord because he doesn’t want a civil war to breakout. Even if the Fire Lord is legitimately corrupt, Kazuya takes their side because a war-torn Fire Nation will end up affecting the other 3 nations, thus “disrupting” the balance.

2) Kazuya establishing his own “Avatar Task Force” to maintain a constant presence in all four nations. This is meant to be a deliberate deviation from Aang and Korra since unlike his predecessors, Kazuya is a lot more proactive than reactive. Of course, this upsets the public since it feels like Kazuya established his own private army rather than a peacekeeping faction.

3) Kazuya deliberately questioning the effectiveness of his predecessors. Saying things like, “Aang wasted people’s time by not killing Ozai” or “Korra was too soft on her enemies”. While this obviously wouldn’t endear him to the audience, it does give us a clear picture of how he views his role as the Avatar.

So, the main arc of this series is obviously very different from the previous two shows. Aang and Korra’s arcs were both a coming-of-age, hero’s journey. Kazuya’s arc is a morality tale, in which he can either learn empathy and realize that you can’t judge people through a black-and-white lens…or continue down the path he’s on and permanently ruin the reputation of the Avatar.

As a side note, if the show ends with Kazuya ruining the Avatar’s reputation, the Fire Avatar show is gonna start off with the world already despising them. Not gonna lie…that’s a fucking interesting concept to explore, especially because Aang and Korra’s shows were about how much the people loved the Avatar. It’d be a dark as fuck ending to have Kazuya destroy all of the Avatar’s goodwill, but it’d make for juicy storytelling.

TL;DR Earth Avatar is an anti-hero who is a mix of Judge Dredd, Daredevil, and the Punisher. And I guess DCEU Batman.

[tgmsunmontue]

Saga of Solitude 10/21

Nepo!Baby Bradley and his life at USNA and afterwards. DADT fully in force. IceMav AU. (Begun prior to 'It's not who you know' - the non-angsty version). (Side Hangster, which is ALSO angsty).

PROLOGUE (He remembers)

HANGSTER FIRST MEETING (Lonely Nights - set 2009)

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS

ONE (2000) TWO (2001) THREE (2002) FOUR (2003) FIVE (2004) SIX (2005) SEVEN (2006) EIGHT (2007) NINE (2008)

CHAPTER TEN - 2009

                “I think I might be done.”

                Tom almost drops the phone and he sits up straighter, knuckles tight.

                “What?”

                “You heard me. I think I might be done. Not with flying. Just… active duty. Think I might try out for that test pilot program you keep leave lying around. You’re not subtle.”

                “Mav…”

                “Best of both worlds right? I still get to fly, but I’m not on the other side of the world. I feel like I’ve been lucky so far, but I don’t want to…”

                He doesn’t finish whatever it is he’s thinking, but Tom can fill in the blanks with a multitude of endings. There’s Bradley of course, but he’s twenty-five. But Tamsin is only twelve and Petra is ten. He knows Mav doesn’t want to leave any of them. He could add himself in there, if he thought that maybe he was enough for Mav to consider giving up active duty. He’s never been enough before, and he’d never be a fool enough to ask Mav to stop doing something he loves, no matter how much Tom worries.

                The days tick past and he hasn’t felt this settled or optimistic since Mav briefly took a break and simply remained in reserves when Carole got sick. Just the knowledge that he won’t be on active duty in a war zone makes him feel ridiculously pleased, even if at the same time he worries about Bradley. Lord he’s glad that the girls are local and he doesn’t need to worry about them other than standard parenting worries. He hopes they pick nice quiet and safe jobs, because as he gets older, he’s not sure his heart is going to take it if it has the same series of shocks it’s experienced with Maverick.

                His next phone conversation doesn’t happen until a couple of weeks later and he finds out the Maverick has requested all the paperwork necessary and submitted an application. He doesn’t let his shock bleed through, but he definitely feels it, accompanied by the realization that when Mav gets home from this deployment he won’t be leaving American soil for a mission again, not if he gets any say in the matter. And he knows someone will ask. He may love Maverick, but he also isn’t blind to any of his faults and his peers know that at least.

                “I’m 48, they probably think I’ve calmed down enough in my old age to give me a shot right?”

                Ice keeps his mouth shut, because he’s made it a rule to try not to lie and he doesn’t think anyone in the Navy will ever assume Maverick has calmed down.

                “You’re definitely qualified for the position. They’d be lucky to have you,” is what he settles on instead.

…            …            …

                “Can we have a movie night daddy?”

                “Of course. As long as the two of you can both compromise on one movie and not argue over it,” Tom says, because listening to them bicker gets exhausting. He knows he’s giving Melissa and Sarah a break most weekends by having them come and stay with him, and he wouldn’t have it any other way, but he finds himself admiring parents who do it all the time with no break in sight. He is so grateful that he has them, but he’s also certain that they enjoy Bradley’s company over his, with them all sharing equal levels of energy.

                “Kung Fu Panda!”

                Tom looks between them and they’re both nodding vigorously; he feels like he’s been set up, tempted to message Sarah and check in to see whether this particular movie has been vetoed for any particular reason. It seems completely benign and he watches it, entertained by the different characters and enjoying having his daughters curled up on either side of him. Tamsin is drifting off, clearly not quite as engaged with the story as Petra, but he’s not going to rouse her and tell her to go to bed, happy to have her slumped against him. It’s not until later, when he’s carried Tamsin, still asleep, up to her bed and come back down to find Petra chopping at the pillows that he realizes his mistake.

                “Daddy? Can I have kung fu lessons?”

                Of course, the warning was right there in the title of the movie. He should have known. She is such a daredevil and so full of energy and god she reminds him of Pete with every smile. He knows he can never say no to her, the best he can do is delay and hope that either she forget (unlikely), or someone else will tell her no.

                “We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

                “Okay! Love you daddy. Good night!”

                “Love you too peanut. Good night…”

…            …            …

                He swings his bag over his shoulder, feels buoyant as he walks toward the spot where everyone is disembarking. He knows he’s got his family waiting and he’s got four more weeks before Mav finishes his own deployment, has spoken to him about his plans to withdraw from active duty if his application for test pilot training is accepted and Bradley knows they won’t be turning someone with Mav’s experience down. But there are two golden weeks where all seven of them will be together and he cannot wait.

                “Expect your wife is going to make you shave that off before she lets you within five yards of her…” Bradley calls out to Flipper, who just laughs and gives him the finger.

                “Like you can grow a better one!” Fin yells back and Bradley laughs.

                “I can grow a better moustache in my sleep.”

                “Photos, or it didn’t happen!”

                “You’re on!”

…            …            …

                “I’m not a baby Bradley…”

                “You’re not even half my age,” Bradley replies, trying his best to keep his amusement from his tone. Tamsin will be a teenager at the end of the year, something he’s sort of in denial about, can still remember his early days of being a teenager himself and Sarah carefully placing infant Tamsin in his arms.

                “Which makes you ancient.”

                “If I’m ancient, what does that make your dad?”

                “A zombie. Have you seen him?”

                Bradley snorts, because Ice definitely looks half-dead, but he’s putting that down to his worry over Maverick, who is in the Middle East, but he should be home in about a week. Not soon enough judging from the dark circle under Ice’s eyes. Although the fact that Ice is for some reason now letting Petra try out a variety of martial arts may also be part of his worry. But it means he gets one-on-one time with Tamsin, who definitely seems to have something on her mind.

                “Bradley.”

                “Yeah. Sorry. I’ll stop changing the subject. Hit me with the serious question you wanted to ask me.” God he hopes it isn’t about sex.

                “Do you think my parents loved each other?”

                Fuck. Sex would be easier. Maybe?

                “Uh… Why do you ask?”

                Shit. He is not equipped for this conversation at all.

                “I just… they seem to love each other. I don’t get why they got divorced.”

                Oh. Okay. Maybe he is equipped to answer this after all.

                “Well, you know your mom is a lesbian right?”

                “So getting married and having me and Petra was a mistake?”

                Double shit. Reverse. Undo. Back track. Fuck.

                “No. I’m pretty sure it was anything but a mistake. I think you and Petra are both very wanted and much loved. Uh. Have you talked to any of your parents about this?”

                “No. I don’t want to upset them.”

                He’s trying to remember how old he was when they told him, how old he was when he figured it out. He knows Ice and Sarah won’t be upset, that they’ve probably been prepared for this conversation for years. And yet she’s having it with him.

                “I just wonder sometimes because I look at Petra and she looks so much more like Papa than she does dad. I look like dad. Petra looks at least a little bit like mom.”

                “Uh. Yeah. I noticed that too. That’s very observant of you.”

                Where the fuck is Ice when he needs him?

                “Do you think my mom had an affair?”

                “No. I know she didn’t… shit.”

                “You’re not meant to swear.”

                “Yeah. I know. This is just… I really think you need to talk to your mom and dad about this.”

                “Why? What’s so bad that you can’t tell me?”

                “Fuck…” Bradley breathes out.

                “You’re really not meant to say that word…”

                “Yeah. Okay. I’m going to tell you. But I’m going to be telling your parents, all of them, that I’ve told you. So you can go and talk with them and ask questions, because… I was your age when your parents got married. I do not have all the details.”

                “Okay. So tell me, what happened?”

                He gives the bare bones, explains, as best he can, about DADT. Agrees with her when she calls it stupid. Talks about his own parents and how both Ice and Mav married women, his mom being one of them, Sarah being the other. He ends up getting a picture of his parents from his room to show her and then holding her as she cries, realizing that he’d lost both his parents when he’d been her age.

                He explains how and why Ice and Mav hide their relationship, that he also won’t be bringing a girlfriend home anytime soon. Isn’t planning on having a relationship anytime soon because it’s simply in the too hard basket. Then he brings up the fact that she is very observant, that Petra does indeed look like Mav, and that’s because Mav is her biological dad. Her eyes are wide, mouth open in surprise and he wonders if he’s said too much. Hopes like hell that trusting his gut is going to have been the right thing to do, that Mav and Ice letting him know about his own mom’s wishes and then letting him make his own decisions about his own life. That they’d want Tamsin to also know the truth of the matter, especially as she’s asking questions.

                “Can I swear?”

                “Sure. Go ahead.”

                “Holy shit.”

                Bradley throws back his head and laughs.

…            …            …

                Knowing that this is his last time is bittersweet. He walks over the deck and lets his fingers trail over the railing. He didn’t join to live his life on a carrier, being on a carrier is just a necessity for somewhere for the planes to land and refuel before they can get back into the sky. He misses the sky every time he’s on the ground, needs the wide open spaces which is why he likes going out to the hangar so much, the sheer amount of space around him makes it feel like he’s close to being in the sky. As he disembarks he can see Bradley standing and waiting, Tamsin and Petra beside him and his throat works, because he’s home, and safe, and he won’t have to leave them again wondering if he’ll not make it home.

…            …            …

                “Jesus kid, you look like you dad.”

                “Uh. Sorry. Do you want me to shave it?”

                “No!” Pete says, vehement. “Shit Bradley. You’re allowed to look like your dad. You do that without even trying. Just took me by surprise. He’d be tickled pink and so proud of you. Your mom would be too, scared shitless every time you were out of sight, but she’d still be so proud. We’re proud of you too you know. All of us. Ice, Sarah, Melissa. You’ve turned into this amazing capable man and I’m immensely proud to call you my son…”

                “Uh. Thanks. I think you all had a lot to do with how I’ve turned out…”

                “We tried to help point you in the right direction, but you’re the one who put in the hard work.”

                “And you and Ice taught me all about hard work.”

                “I guess we did.”

                “Can I ask you something?”

                “Of course, you can ask me anything.”

                “When you taught me how to shave… did you feel old?”

                “Old? No. Not old. But… a little sad I guess?”

                “Sad?”

                “Well, that your dad wasn’t the one teaching you. That you weren’t this little kid anymore. I was glad I got to be there for it… You planning on keeping that caterpillar?”

                “No. Just growing it for a dare. Why?”

                “I have something of your dad’s. He was ridiculously proud of his moustache, had this little kit that your mom bought him, little comb and brush, little pair of scissors. Been keeping it safe, if you end up needing it for your own then I guess I better get it out of storage…”

                “I… thanks Mav. I’ll be shaving it off before I report back though. Too annoying to maintain and keep tidy.”

                “Okay. Well, you let me know if you change your mind.”

…            …            …

                “You want to do my hair?”

                “Yeah! Can we but bows in it?”

                “Have at it,” Bradley says, so glad they’re both still willing to be a little silly with him. He knows with the current state of the US military he’s never going to have kids, not unless he figures something out with Natasha and he doesn’t think she’d put her career on hold and he wouldn’t expect her to. So he will make do with what he has and enjoy it as much as he can in the moment, knows Tamsin is very much on the cusp of not doing this again, is simply

                “Why don’t you always let it grow long?”

                “Navy doesn’t allow us to have long hair.”

                “They Navy is dumb,” Tamsin says, pouting as she runs a sparkly purple comb through his curls, and Bradley bites down on his lips to hide a grin. She’s been quite vocal to him about how stupid she thinks the whole institution is, although very careful not to say it within hearing of either Ice or Mav. Although Mav has just appeared in the door, eye bright with mischief as he takes in the scene.

                “You look very pretty Bradley.”

                “Thank you. They worked very hard to make me look this good.”

                “Papa! Come sit!”

                Bradley laughs at the expression on Mav’s face, but then he’s sinking to the floor beside him and Petra is putting bows in his hair as well and he’s pretty sure he’s never seen Mav look happier. The dark circles under Ice’s eyes have also gone so Bradley is pretty sure everything is right with their world.

…            …            …

                Tamsin looks miserable and Bradley isn’t sure what he can do, needs to immediately fix whatever it is that is making her look like this. They’ve grown closer during this leave period, with their conversation making her feel more like an adult, at least with him. Fortunately he’d been commended for how he’d handled the conversation with her, the approval of all his parental figures had hit him hard and unexpected, not aware how much he still wanted and needed it.

                “What’s wrong?”

                “Nothing.”

                “Uh. You look sad though.”

                “I’m allowed to be sad!” Tamsin snaps and Bradley’s eyebrows shoot up.

                “Can you tell me why you’re sad?”

                “I can’t go swimming…”

                Bradley blinks, confused.

                “Um. Why not?”

                “Because I have my period.”

                He rears back, the shock of the fact and the straightforward statement taking him completely by surprise. Sure they were like brother and sister, but this was new.

                “Since when?”

                “Since this morning. It’s not contagious. Stop looking at me like that!”

                “Um. Sorry. Just, uh, I kind of… you’re growing up I guess and that’s just…”

                “Making you feel really old?”

                “Yeah, little bit. Shit.”

                “You think it’s shit for you? You’re not the one that has to have it every month…”

                “I apologize on behalf of my entire gender.”

                “Good. You should be sorry.”

                He bites his lip and nods his head, holy hell she’s going to be a force to be reckoned with and he really should have invited Natasha home with him. Next time.

                “How about we go ice skating instead?”

                “Oh! Yes! But don’t let Petra bully you into playing hockey. She can wait until the season starts again.”

                “Petra is playing hockey?”

                “Duh. She tried field hockey but then complained it wasn’t fast enough. I think mom is a little worried she’s going to steal the car and take it for a ride.”

                “Ha. Hahahaha,” Bradley laughs nervously, because hold shit if he didn’t already know she was Mav’s kid, hearing that she likes things fast and a little dangerous. “How is her skateboarding going?”

                “Good. She’s managing some really cool things now. We should go to the skatepark so she can practice.”

                “You’re a good big sister.”

                “Thanks. I had a good big brother to show me what not to do.”

                “Hey!”

                “Kidding! I love you Bradley.”

                “Love you too Tamsin.”

…            …            …

                With a sense of dejavu he reads the news. Gay marriage has been legalized in Iowa and also Vermont. That’s four different states now. It’s like a domino effect and after decades of hiding.

…            …            …

                “Sir.”

                “Aubrey. What is it.”

                “Sorry sir. Nothing.”

                From experience Tom knows it is definitely not nothing. Aubrey takes her breaks with all the other support staff and has some convoluted but incredibly invaluable way of hearing of things before they become issues which he then finds he has to deal with.

                “Clearly it isn’t nothing. What have you heard this time?”

                He hasn’t told her about his little note-book, but he suspects she has something similar, even if it’s only in her own head.

                “You��ve known Captain Mitchell for a long time sir.”

                Inwardly Tom groans to himself, wonders what the hell he’s done now.

                “Yes. Over twenty years.”

                “A good friend then sir.”

                “Yes. My best friend.”

                She looks torn then and he frowns, wonders what she knows that he potentially hasn’t already heard about from someone else in the Navy. Maverick is not known for being quiet or passing unnoticed, which is why he suspects that their relationship has gone unremarked upon for so many years, many people assuming Maverick could not keep something like that secret.

                “Maverick was seen going into your ex-wife’s house… at nearly midnight.”

                He doesn’t let his surprise show, because while he knows there is gossip he’d never expected to hear it from his assistant. Also this is something he knows about, because Maverick took his car, because the bike would have been far too noisy at midnight.

                “Okay. Just to be clear, you think that Maverick is having an affair with my ex-wife?”

                “Isn’t he meant to be your best friend sir?”

                Oh. Wow. There goes the idea that she had clocked him.

                “Okay. Yes. He is my best friend. In fact his late-wife, Bradley’s mom, introduced me to Sarah. However Sarah and Maverick are grown consenting adults… However, if we’re talking about last week, well Maverick was there because Melissa was working a night shift, Sarah and the girls were sick and I couldn’t risk getting sick and Mav is on leave…”

                “Oh.”

                He swallows nervously, because he’d sort of assumed that she had put everything together, that he and Mav were more than just friends. However the fact that she thinks… well, thought. Until he just cleared that up.               

                “Melissa? The woman Captain Mitchell brought to the dinner last year?”

                “Yes. My ex-wife’s… wife,” Tom provides, and this is potentially where all his well-craft duplicity comes undone, however he’s never been wrong yet with where he’s laid his trust.

                “Oh. Oh. Sir.”

                “Was there a question in there Aubrey?”

                “No sir. Not at all. You have a very lovely family.”

                “Yes. I consider myself very lucky to have them all in my life.”

                “Just so sir.”

…            …            …           

(LONELY NIGHTS FITS HERE - Bradley and Jake hook up the weekend before they both report to Corpus Christi.)

…            …            …

                He’s known in the pit of his stomach that he and Jake were reporting to the same base, however he hadn’t realized that Jake was also a naval aviator and that means their circles of interactions are overlapping too much for his own liking. He doesn’t speak with Jake directly, doesn’t let any sign of recognition show on his face as they’re introduced. Jake is fresh from USNA, bright and eager and smart and also so fucking talented that Bradley can see why he’s here. Without even being aware of it he finds himself tracking Jake’s movements and god, he needs to get it under control and figure out a way to be more subtle otherwise he’s going to bring them both down.

                He wonders if he’d still have slept with him if he’d known.

                He needs to talk to Ice and Mav and figure out how they keep it hidden, because he’s worked too hard to get where he is to let it all crumble apart now.

…            …            …

                “Sir. Captain Mitchell is here to see you.”

                “Of course. Thank you Aubrey. Captain Mitchell, nice to see you again.”

                “And you Admiral.”

                He doesn’t miss the fact that she makes Maverick a cup of coffee.

…            …            …

                Bradley’s normal Saturday afternoon phone call is usually with Mav, and he’s just about to offer to go and get him when it becomes apparent that Bradley maybe wants to talk to him first, words exploding out of him.

                “How do you do it? Have your relationship with Mav and settle for… this weird half-life?”

                God he hopes Bradley is somewhere he can’t be overheard.

                “When it’s that, or the option of not having him in my life at all? It’s an easy decision.”

                On the other end of the line Bradley sucks in a breath, Tom isn’t sure how to take it. Wonders what the hell Bradley has gotten up to when he’s not even been gone two weeks.

                “He’s a rank below me.” It’s Tom’s turn to suck in a sharp breath, but a single rank isn’t unsurmountable. Not when it’s low and there isn’t a large differential of power. “I didn’t even know he was Navy when we hooked up the first time.”

                “The first time?”

                “Well, the first time rolled into the second and then… a couple of days and nights together.”

                “Jesus Bradley. Are you sure he’s not going to make a complaint against you?”

                “I’m not completely sure, but I don’t think he would. He might not like me very much right now, but I don’t think he hates me and would want to implode my career.”

                “Shit Bradley. Look. It’s going to be hard either way. Being with him, not being able to tell anyone, spending months apart, having to pretend you don’t care about him anymore than any other of your shipmates… But that type of hard can be worth it when you come home to each other. Or you make a hard decision now and cut your losses, walk away from it and then always wonder what might have happened…”

                “Yeah. I’ve already cut my losses.”

                “Okay kid. Okay.”

…            …            …

                “Hey Mav.”

                “Bradley. You okay?”

                “Yeah. I’m fine. Just… you know that moustache kit of my dads?”

                “Yes.”

                “Could you send it to me?”

                “Of course buddy. Everything okay?”

                “Yeah. I just… figured I’d try keeping it for a bit. Someone told me I suited it.”

                “Well, they weren’t wrong.”

…            …            …

                On Monday when Tom gets to work he asks Aubrey to collate a list of all current personnel going through flight school at Corpus Christi. Knows one of them is going to be Bradley’s maybe unwise hook-up.

                He also asks her to get him a new note book.

CHAPTER ELEVEN (2010)

[unnamedmedicalprofessional]

There's a fan theory that The Doctor's regenerations are subconscious reactions to the experiences of the previous regeneration (which deep breath pretty much makes canon). It's been argued that the tenth doctor is a response to falling in love with Rose and becoming a handsome young man to woo her.

This kind of recontextualizes the tenth doctor as a character, because his fatal flaw is kind of that he's too good at acting like a 19 year old. He's too human for the life of an alien. His youthfulness is distinctively adolescent compared to other young doctors like eleven, who looks 26 but acts like a mix of an old man and a child.

Ten's youth and humanity is present in some of his most flawed moments. His whole "I could do so much more" rant feels frankly pathetic and adolescent. (which is not an insult to the scene from a writing perspective, I think it's compelling because of that). His "I don't want to go" angst is a distinctly more human perspective than the more detached accepting approach to regeneration a lot of other Doctors have. Him going time lord victorious is motivated by him looking at time travel through a human moral compass instead of a time lord one, but allowing that human mindset to mix with a time lord god complex. His punishment of the family of blood is rooted in him wanting to be human, getting his wish, and having that wish ripped away from him. Him treating Martha like a rebound also feels like something you'd expect from a young man, and the caring but detached alien nature of other doctors prevent them from doing the same thing.

Some people might disagree with me on this, but I've always seen the tenth doctor as less repressed than the average Doctor. This is how The Day Of The Doctor explicitly frames the contrast between the tenth, and eleventh doctor as the man who regrets and the man who forgets. Part of this is also how Tennant plays the role. When 9, 11 and 12 are sad or angry, their actors play it with a sense of world-weariness like they've been through this a million times and are just tired. Tennant plays it like he's experiencing this stuff for the first time. 13 and 15 frankly haven't done scenes like that often enough, but that's a whole separate rant. Part of this is why I don't like 10 quite as much as 9, 11 or 12, as I prefer a more world weary ancient doctor, but 10's great and interesting in his own right.

And in a way, maybe he is. The classic series is on average less emotional and angsty than the new series, and this is really just a product of how the norms of television changed between the 80s and mid-2000s, but you could also interpret the trauma of the time war bringing those emotions to the forefront. Nine was the first to deal with those emotions, ten let them run wild, and 11,12 and 13 are all in various ways trying and failing to put that genie back in the bottle.

[beansricejc]

JOHN WICK x READER - The Courier

part 4!

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3]

summary: John sneaks into your apartment to surprise you when you get home, and asks for you two to become official. Then y’all finally get steamy in the bedroom, where he talks you through it the whole time. Female reader, 3270 words.

author’s note: thx for following so far! if you’re new here, I’d recommend reading the previous parts but it is not necessary! feel free to lmk what you think! I love reading what u have to say! thx 💕

warnings: cursing, p in v, relationship talk, breaking & entering, alcohol, implied organized crime, significant age gap. 🔞

Your condo was surprisingly easy to break into. Well, for John that is, and John’s the best there is. It’s no surprise that getting into your place without a key is a walk in the park to him. 

It’s been about a month and a half since the pair of you began to see each other. People John’s age would call it casual dating. People your age would call it a situationship.

One of the biggest challenges was John trying to keep up with your lingo, and then whenever he’d try to use it in a sentence, he’d fail drastically. 

Enough of that. 

John’s lurking around in your living room. He’s been here a few times before. Dinner, drinks, movies, and gaming nights, you name it. John’s Casanova identity was slowly being torn apart by you. He had developed feelings for you that he was convinced would never appear again after the death of his wife. 

The last place he thought those feelings would come from was a young crime boss. The sheer idea of it almost made him laugh, even if it was true. 

Tonight, he’s going to ask you to make it official. A public romantic relationship, between a budding crime lord, and an infamous hitman. 

It sounded ridiculous, yet it was all John wanted. 

-

Meanwhile, you’re driving back home from a very frustrating work meeting. 

The title of work meeting was a very loose term. It mostly consisted of you berating some of your workers for fucking up a decent sized delivery. Two of your employees had totaled their motorcycles, and were suffering from road rash, and the other one forgot to fill up on gas before the job.

Fucking idiots.

That didn’t matter now, you were blaring some A$AP Ferg just to let out some frustration, your Audi R8 was a fantastic car to speed down the highway in. You, of course, specialized in riding a motorcycle but fall was on its way, evident by the chill in the air. 

The plan for you tonight was to get home, drink half a bottle of Plum Sake, and pass out to some sort of Netflix Original playing on your tv. 

You thought about shooting John a text since he had messaged you a few hours ago. You decided you would text him once you got home.  

-

John was admiring your home aesthetic, he had complimented it a few times. You really had the 70s vibe down to a T. The nostalgia was almost overwhelming to him, you were a 2000s baby, and John was, well, not. 

John was surprised that you hadn’t said anything to show that you hated the age gap you two had, except for the occasional old man diss. 

John took a closer look at some pictures that were in frames on a shelf. He didn’t know exactly what they were. If he was a betting man, it would be a high school graduation photo with friends, vacation pictures, and then some competitive Motocross racing images.

“Damn, badass.” John chuckled, it was interesting getting an insider look at your life since you are a crime lord after all. 

-

You parked your car in the garage and made your way to your condo, a few floors up and a few doors down. Your stupid key was so hard to find in your purse, and you almost gave up looking for it out of pure exhaustion. However, you managed, sighing as you opened your door and kicked your shoes off onto the rack. 

You didn’t notice John at all. No one ever did. He was an expert, and experts act like ghosts when they need to. 

You hung your purse up on a hook and immediately went for the kitchen and into the fridge, searching for sparkling water to chug. You didn’t know why but the burn of it going down your throat was really great feeling. To you at least. 

As you grabbed a can, you could tell something was off. You weren’t that dumb. Any normal person would have gone about their business as usual, you picked up on a presence in less than two minutes. Impressive. 

“Hey, cutie.” John’s voice suddenly appeared from your living room, his tall and menacing figure emerging from the shadows of your dark condo. You jump, grab your gun that’s in your back holster, and stop abruptly after you realized it was John. You went into panic mode from hearing his voice and gasped to settle yourself down. 

“Shithead! Oh my god, you scared the fuck out of me!” You exclaim, there are actually a million other things you’d like to say right now. 

“Asshole!”

“I’m gonna knock your teeth in.”

“Holy shit, you’re hot as fuck.” 

Those were a few examples, of course, you didn’t say any of them. They were still going through your head though. 

John was cackling from the living room while he stepped towards you, you put your firearm down on your kitchen counter, fuming at the fact that he somehow broke in, and almost gave you a heart attack. John absolutely loved teasing you, watching your face getting frustrated or flustered really did something to him that he couldn’t explain. 

John joined you in the kitchen as you were calming yourself down, the danger you were in being a false alarm. He gave out a throaty deep chuckle, looking down at you with those menacing brown eyes. 

They were never menacing towards you. John couldn’t even imagine the thought of doing something to hurt you or to even intentionally scare you. Over the past month, he’s grown to like you more and more, a thought that scared the shit out of him. He’s gonna do it. He’s going to ask you to be his girlfriend. 

What a juvenile term, he felt much too old to even use that word but what else was there? 

John hadn’t exactly figured out how he was going to ask, one thing was for sure, it would happen tonight. 

He didn’t know why but tonight just felt like a really good choice. 

John’s long dark hair is slightly draped over his chiseled face, his eyes peering through the strands directly at you. 

“Sorry, angel. You’re just so cute when you get scared.” John tells you. You’re currently putting on the biggest pouty face you can manage right now, just to show your disdain for his prank. 

You can hardly be mad at the man. He’s just so damn attractive. He’s even wearing a tee shirt, you have never seen him wear one before. John’s toned biceps are peeking out of his short sleeves. Your eyes can’t help but drink in the sight of his bare arms. Multiple scars and bruises are sprinkled throughout his skin, ones you have yet to hear stories of, or even see. 

You snap out of your fan service moment when John takes his large hand to ruffle your hair. He loved the feeling of your thick and soft hair against his skin, and the smell? He had no idea what type of shampoo you used, the smell of it was embedded into his memory and only associated with you now. 

Raspberries, and coconut? That was probably the closest he’d get to guessing the scent. 

“I should upgrade your security here, it took me like 20 seconds to get in. I expected better from a criminal mastermind.” John tsked at you, playfully disappointed. 

He takes the chance to lean against your kitchen’s island, crossing his legs but his gaze has yet to leave you. 

You’re such a beautiful creature. 

The sight of John’s casual lean stirs something inside of your chest. 

Christ, can this guy get any sexier? You think to yourself. 

“Sorry, guess I haven’t looked into that yet.” you stammer. John waves you over, and you take a few steps towards him, laying against his body and setting your head on his chest. You press your ear to him, listening to the soft thuds of his heartbeat, the organ doing its job to keep pumping blood through this lethal man. 

“Hey, uh, let’s talk for a sec.” John says suddenly after about a minute of mutual silence. You scrunch your eyebrows and peer up at him, curious. Why did he sound so serious all of a sudden? He looked nervous almost. 

“Yeah, sure, what’s up?” you ask. 

John is quiet for a few seconds, it looked like he was trying to find the right words to say. You’re really enjoying laying against him since his body is so warm, and definitely not because of the muscles you can feel against your own. 

“So.” He starts. “What do you say we make our little situation exclusive?” 

Your eyes widen. No way. Absolutely no way. Was John fucking Wick asking you to be, oh Jesus Christ. The deadly playboy was being serious, and you can tell based on how his brown eyes are soft but with anticipation growing inside of them. 

Oh my god. 

You were clearly interested, even if both of your schedules clashed with each other. You two were well-known workaholics in the criminal underworld, the few times you got to see him a week were very romantic, however, short-lived. 

With this in mind, your time spent together was amazing but as far as the physical aspects, you two were taking it slow. You of course were doing it unintentionally, work tired you out, you haven’t really done anything sexual of the sort in years because of your painstakingly busy work life, and so on and so forth. 

John, on the other hand, was becoming a bit sexually frustrated. He really loved your wholesome time spent together, he did! Just, sometimes the way your pants fit around those hips and ass of yours, his mind tended to, wander, to say the least. 

“Are you asking if you can be my boyfriend, Johnathan?” you inquire, walking your pointer and middle finger up his chest to fidget with the hem of his black tee shirt. You were attempting to calm yourself down but were failing miserably, just the sight of John looking down at you in that idyllic gaze of his was driving you absolutely nuts. A soft but low hum escaped his lips. 

“Or maybe, I’m asking you to be my girlfriend,” he whispered down at you. 

You don’t really know why but you laugh. 

“Same question, different fonts.” you giggle. John huffs in amusement at your statement. He still doesn’t know where you come up with these things, or really how internet culture works. 

“God, you guys, and your memes.” he sighed. “You can’t leave a man hangin’ like this, angel. What’s it gonna be?” 

You haven’t had a real relationship in years, and it seems like John is in the same boat as you. He’s mentioned his late wife only once to you, obviously, it was a sore subject. He was serious about starting anew with you it seemed. 

“I wouldn’t want to be anybody else’s.” you murmur to him. 

John’s immediately filled with glee, and he squeezes you in a death lock of a hug. You eyes bulge as you attempt to hug him back but your arms, or anything really, are unable to move. 

Well, it’s official. The two of you shared an excited kiss before he goes to your living room, revealing the very nice bottle of wine he brought to celebrate the occasion. 

It seemed like he was betting on you saying yes. 

You’re quite flattered by his confidence, and grab two wine glasses from your liquor cabinet before you two sit on your orange couch and share the bottle with each other. 

Fun conversation ensues. You two are a fantastic couple, you guys found that out a few hang-outs in. John thought you were hilarious, and he definitely had his moments. The man was a total flirt, even after you two had been dating for the past month. 

Conversation turns into joking, joking turned into play fighting, and next thing you knew he was laying you down on your couch, your legs wrapped around his waist as he pressed his hard on in between your thighs. 

“We have too many clothes on, can we change that?” John asked as he stripped his shirt right off of his torso. 

What a sight to behold. 

Despite John being in his mid-forties, he has stayed in shape for the sake of his career, and it shows. Toned muscles have been revealed above you, and you’re honestly shocked. It’s the shape he’s in and the scars that got you, John noticed as your eyes dart to the different marks on his body. 

“Do I rock the bad boy look?” he slyly asks, his hands wiggling under you and lifting your body up and over his shoulder as he brought you to your bedroom, despite your gasp of surprise and hysterical laughter. 

You’re finally at an angle where you can see his tattoos, you didn’t know he had any. His back is covered, you can make out a Latin phrase and, a wolf. Was that a wolf? Guess he was Team Jacob all along. 

You squeal as he plops you onto your queen-sized mattress, and your lips crash into each other, desperately craving the other’s touch. John’s hands assist you in peeling off your shirt and jeans, tossing the clothing to the wooden floor. His breathing seems to heighten at the image of you in only a seamless bra and a thong, your soft skin, curves, everything is better than he had ever imagined. 

He’s going to absolutely ruin you. 

Minutes pass, and the sting of John’s beard dragging along your inner thighs is a sensation that is completely unfamiliar to you. Your hands are grappling at your duvet from underneath your now nude body, as John’s tongue is sloppily circling your swollen clit, and some inhuman noises are erupting from your throat.

“H-holy, fuck!” you shriek. You were no virgin but you haven’t been intimate with anyone for a few years. 

John couldn’t say the same thing. 

You knew what good was even if it has been a long while, and this was fucking immaculate. John dips two long fingers into your core, his eyes boring into yours while he was devouring your cunt. 

“You’re such a good fucking girl,” John mumbled into your pussy as he continued to lap you up with his mouth, the vibration of his words almost sending you over the edge. John’s using that signature come here motion with his fingers inside of you, and your hips buck, legs wrapping around his neck and squeezing to force him to stay in his current position. 

He had honestly forgotten how strong you are. 

He’s fucking obsessed. 

His other hand is stroking his completely erect cock, making sure he’s good and ready to claim you as his. 

You’re strong but John’s stronger. He’s able to easily push past your thigh’s grasp, you’re almost seeing double from the pure ecstasy he’s been so gracious to gift you. His mouth and chin are slick with your juices, his tongue dragging over his lips while he smiled down at you to savor your taste. 

You can barely think. Holy fuck, was this actually happening right now? Did John Wick make a deal with the Devil to have the ultimate skill of giving head? 

You blink a few times and catch a glimpse of John’s erection. Jesus Christ, it’s way bigger than you had ever pictured it. 

“J-John, that’s not going to fit!” you cry out at him, as much as you want him, that thing is fucking huge. John tilted his head of sweaty, messy, long hair, raising his eyebrows and giving you a chuckle. “Seriously? Baby girl, how long has it been for you?” John questions, spitting into his palm and giving himself a few more tugs to hold himself over. Somehow, your face becomes redder than it was already. 

“Uh, a few years,” you admit, embarrassed to even say it out loud. “Just, don’t really have the time.” 

That admission throws John completely off. It doesn’t stop him from rubbing his bare tip against your slick and swollen entrance. “Don’t worry, angel, I’ll change that.” he smirked down at you, his eyes are all over your nude body below him on the bed. You only reply with a small squeak in response to the sensation of his tip on you. “Just, trust me, princess. Can you do that, trust me?” John asks, leaning completely over you so he’s just a few inches above your sweaty face. You nod while he pushes into you, and there’s a lot of resistance to him, despite the several minutes of foreplay he had provided you. You grit your teeth and grip his back. 

“Hey, hey, you’re tense.” John murmurs, grazing your cheek with the back of his hand. You two maintain eye contact as he’s gently entering you. “Can you take a deep breath?” 

You listen to him, taking a deep breath, and even you can tell the difference in feeling down in your core. “See, look at that, you just need to relax for me, baby girl. Take another one for me.” John orders you sweetly.

You oblige. 

John lets out a deep breath, your tight cunt is almost overwhelming to him. After your deep breaths, your pussy is letting up and welcoming him now. 

“See, you feel that? You’re taking me in all by yourself now, good girl.” John praises while you respond with unintelligible whimpers, his lips peppering kisses onto your sweaty forehead. 

You can feel his entire length inside of you at this point, he’s so deep, you swear you can feel him in your cervix. You gasp before he continues, sliding in and out of you at a gentle and steady pace, nipping and sucking onto your neck and collarbone. This is sure to leave marks later but he could care less. People should know who you belong to. 

“You like that, baby?” he asks as he thrusts at a faster and deeper rate, you moan affirmatively, you can’t seem to respond in English at the moment, only squeals and whimpers that he can’t help but be attracted to. One of John’s hands travel to your cunny, skillfully rubbing his thumb over your tortured clit. You let out a small scream, your nails digging into his muscular back, he’s doing the same to your hip, so the feeling was mutual. 

John can feel your cunt tighten around his fast moving cock, he wasn’t going to last much longer like this, especially with no condom on. 

You were in the same boat though.

“J-john, fuck! I wanna cum so bad!” you mewl out, John throws a dark chuckle your way. The timing was spot on.

“You want me on your stomach, face?” He asked. 

“Just, just, do it, I don’t care!” You gasp, approaching your climax while he continued to rub your clit as he pounded into your tight little cunny.

“Don’t care, huh? Interesting.” He grunts. “I’ll make you my little Twinkie then, alright?�� 

You’re quite literally in the middle of a tear jerking orgasm while he says this, so you really don’t have time to react to the absolutely ridiculous phrase. Your trembling legs and shaky grasp on his body is what sends John over, he cursed and grunted, releasing all the way into your cunt. Ropes of cum shoot into you, and you twitch at the sensation. 

You’re both trying your best to catch your breath as he pressed his forehead to yours and chuckled. 

“Did you just call me a fucking Hostess snack?” you huff out, and he can’t help but burst out laughing. 

“Yeah, I think I did.” 

[tamblr]

Intro to Tantric Shaivism

Shiva as a god is someone who has been deeply influential in my personal spiritual journey. From watching both Lord Ram and Ravana pray to him to seeing the relationship between Shiva and Shakthi, I was always intuitively fascinated by him and that led naturally to intellectual curiosity. In the previous write up I had summarised the meaning of Tantra, this is a small introduction to Shaivism. 

Shaivism is the worship of Lord Shiva as the supreme being. It is an ancient Hindu sect that is an amalgamation of pre Vedic and Vedic traditions. As such, some scholars have dated the sect to the Indus Valley civilisation at 2500-2000 BCE. 

Shaivism has many schools of thought, two of the most popular ones being: Saiva siddhanta and Kashmiri Shaivism from which we will draw most of the metaphysics, philosophy and cosmology from but first…

Who or what is Shiva? 

The answer to this question itself could be a series all on its own but here’s two etymologies from two of the most ancient languages: Tamil and Sanskrit.

I was reading this incredible novel called Kottravai where the author describes the etymology of the word, Sivam, this is my very rough translation of the tamil text, “from the word meaning, life (Siivam), the people named their lord sivam”. From sivam comes siivan, more predominantly pronounced as jiivan meaning soul or living being. 

Indeed, one of the most ancient names of the lord is pasu-pati, lord (pati) of animals (pasu). In Saiva Siddhanta, pasu is has a further meaning of soul so the lord of souls. 

According to Monier-Williams, the Sanskrit word "Shiva" means "auspicious, propitious, gracious, benign, kind, benevolent, friendly". The root words of shiva in folk etymology are śī which means "in whom all things lie, pervasiveness" and va which means "embodiment of grace”.

While the Tamil etymology talks about who he is, the Sanskrit one gives a description of his characteristics. 

But what is he? 

He is sat-cit-ananda (being-consciousness-bliss). Or more succinctly, the universal consciousness. Kashmiri Shaivism talks about the universal consciousness as having two characteristics: prakasa (light) and vimarsa (reflective awareness) and talks about the universal consciousness as being the efficient cause whose effect is the vibration of consciousness (spanda). Here it should be noted that cause and effect are reciprocal processes where cause leads to effect and effect back to cause.

While we talk about Shiva as masculine, it is important to note that Shiva and Shakthi are a dual principle, like two sides of the same coin where Shakthi is the instrumental cause whose effect is pure energy (kundalini Shakthi). Symbolised in Ardhanadishwara.

Similarly, while Shaivism and vaishnavism are at odds with each other in many aspects, the old name for Visnu in the Tamil was Mayon, the personification of Maya (material reality, illusion) and Shaivite traditions agree that Maya is another aspect of Shakthi. The duality of Shiva and Vishnu is symbolised in Hari-Hara.

Proof of existence 

Saiva siddhanta, a school popular in South India is a philosophical school that is based on theistic realism and therefore offers a rational argument for why the universal consciousness should exist. The proof first begins with 3 laws:

All existing things have arisen and must at some time be destroyed. 

Law I, to the thesis that the world in its entirety must have been created at one point of time, and, again at one point of time, will in its entirety be destroyed; the world has a beginning and an end. 

Everything that gets destroyed must arise again; something that exists cannot become a nothing. 

Law 2, that the world's history will not end with its destruction, but that after a certain time it will be created anew out of itself; a new world-creation will follow a world- destruction. 

Whatever arises must have existed before; a nothing can't turn into an existent something

Law 3, that an eternal living something must form the basis of this world, out of which it was created, and into which it will at some time be resolved, and from which it will at another time again be created.

But why Shiva?

Why is Shiva the personification of the universal consciousness? The answer given is quite simple. 

There is a popular Tamil saying: ‘Anbe Sivam’ which means ‘love is Shiva’ or ‘shiva is love’. To quote from Saiva siddhanta: “You must worship what engages your love, you disciples of advaita.” Advaita means non-duality of subject and object and talks about the relationship between the individual soul and the divine. So from their perspective, anything that fuels your love is your personification of the divine and for Shaivites due to the history, culture and religion, Shiva is who engages their love and hence their devotion.

This is where the idea of Tantra comes into play. ‘The exploration of the inner cosmos is Tantra that helps one discover the inner architecture of one’s self and its relationship with the outer world.’ Tantric Shaivism is essentially the exploration and recognition of the soul and its relationship to Shiva, the personification of the universal consciousness.

Why use a personification?

the soul has three faculties: knowledge, will, action 

it needs something to lean on, which it then imitates and assimilates

its faculties need to be set in motion by some impulse from outside.

When you love something, you desire to understand it, be with it and you immerse your thoughts in it. In other words, you develop devotion. This is what you lean on. The qualities of the personification of the universal consciousness as being auspicious, benevolent, full of grace enable the soul to be able to imitate it and assimilate with it. This love is fuelled by culture, mythology and other personal experiences unique to each individual so theology helps set in motion the faculties of the soul. 

Knowledge - Knowledge can roughly be of two types: intellectual knowledge and instinctual knowledge. Instinctual knowledge is brought about by faith and the faith is strengthened through intellectual knowledge gathered from reading scripture, philosophy etc. Sometimes instinct can give rise to intellectual curiosity and other times intellectual exploration can give rise to a deity that is instinctually recognised by the soul. 

Will - the will is simply the ability of a person to concentrate completely on the divine and is fuelled by devotion and resilience of one’s faith and this initiates action.

Action - action is the performance of inner (meditation, chanting mantras) and outer (puja, yoga) rituals acting as a symbolic union from which the actual union with the divine occurs

One of my main resources was the book Saiva Siddhanta: An Indian School of mystical thought in addition to other resources which I would be happy to link if anyone is curious.

[nevesmose]

I've been doing a bit of folklore/urban legend research for another Night Lords lore post since people seemed to like the first one, and apparently I stopped watching Adventure Time just before this particular episode.

Go and be a teacher on Nostramo, they said. Help to bring the light of the Imperial Truth to the kids. It'll be fun, they said.

0845 - 0900 Registration (of the previous night's deaths)

0900 - 1100 We Love the Night Haunter

1100 - 1115 Interval (gang violence to be kept to an appropriate minimum)

1115 - 1245 Nostraman Poetry

1245 - 1345 Lunch (pupils are sent into the underhive to hunt rats and/or each other)

1345 - 1400 Evidence Disposal (pupils who didn't survive lunch are fed to the school crows)

1400 - 1500 We Still Love the Night Haunter

1500 - 1530 Basic Human Anatomy

1530 - 1600 Criminal Accountancy (including Principles of Tax Evasion)

1600 - 1615 Colours (pupils attempt to imagine colours other than black and grey)

1615 - 1645 Beefs (the day's gang feuds are resolved)

1645 - 1700 Expulsions (underperforming pupils without sufficient underworld connections are sent to serve the VIII Legion)

1700 - 2000 Minecraft (in the adamantium mines)

[higheverweave]

Friends, Goths,Problem children, and Losers ,

Has Nobody considered the modern 2000’s Avatar would be fire nation?

Here me out : Air, Water , Earth , Fire Long ago all four elements lived together in harmony

That balance was lost when corporations started working together to manipulate the rulers of all four nations and the councilors of Republic city to keep throwing nature out of balance for their own gain,

And Only the Avatar Master of all four elements can restore balance

Fire Nation Avatar ventures into the spirit world to create the Ultimate team Avatar of the companions and friends of previous team Avatars….

Her first stop is two older men… One knows the Avatar better than anyone else and the other knows how to restore Balance to even the most dire of situations.*She bows politely.* “Lord Zuko I am afraid I must ask you for your help…. Once again. For the two previous Avatars the connection to previous Avatars was severed… Two generations ago you had to hunt one Avatar to restore your honor… I as one of your descendants need to hunt them all to restore the Avatar state connection and restore my honor by restoring balance to the world…. And in so doing preventing the planet from dying completely…. Can I count on your support to hunt the Avatars one last time?”

Modern Avatar invents Wifi bending from lightening bending creating a new form of hacking

She then turns to General Iroh (The first.) “Help me restore balance please and When Ive found the people who complete this Ultimate team Avatar we will meet at the gates of the spirit world… and we will begin looking for how to restore the avatar state and restore balance…

Her Twin brother is the current Firelord… when he started listening to his advisors he Exiled his sister a move that literally divided the fire nation in twoas half followed her and the other half remained loyal to the firelord. The half that went with her became the Electric Nation and both Nations were divided by the Firewall.

And the first wifi bender becomes the first Memelord of the electricity nation….

[filmfauxpas]

Twilight and Its Ever-Changing Directors—Why Catherine Hardwicke’s is The Best. 

Twilight is one of my top three favorite films and was my introduction to fan culture. My stepmom was an avid fan, taking my sister and me to the midnight premieres, playing the original soundtrack on the way to school, and reading each book as they were released. Every fall, I enjoy revisiting my favorite characters as part of my Halloween tradition. While my love for the series is unmatched, there are things I wish were different. Like many fans, my biggest gripe with the franchise is the constant change in style, which primarily comes down to the director changes between films. There is no doubt that Catherine Hardwicke’s Twilight was the best. Her 2008 adaptation was the most well-received among all the films by critics, as it ranked highest according to Rotten Tomatoes.

Hardwicke’s understanding of teenagers demonstrated in films like Thirteen and Lords of Dogtown, made her the perfect choice for Twilight. Summit, the producer of Twilight, approached her after recognizing her knack for exploring the complexity of teenage emotions.  Hardwicke agreed to direct and, despite a modest $4 million budget, she created the beloved film starring Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. Blue, dreamy, moody, and romantic, the first Twilight aesthetic became iconic, thanks to Hardwicke’s indie film sensibility. Unlike other adaptations of the time, Twilight felt more intimate—its hushed dialogue, early 2000s fashion, and on-location filming only added to its charm. Following its release, Twilight grossed $393 million worldwide. Following its success, Summit wanted a sequel as soon as possible, giving Hardwicke less than a year to create and direct New Moon. Hardwicke argued against execs, which ultimately ended in Summit abandoning her to find someone who would meet their demands. 

In 2009, New Moon was directed by Chris Weitz, and the remaining three films were also helmed by male directors. Although the sequels enjoyed box office success, critically, they fell short compared to Hardwicke’s original vision. Hardwicke expressed her opinion on this choice of directors, saying: “[it was] a heartbreak for me. There are other badass women out there that could have done those.” The absence of a woman's perspective is evident in the remaining films.

Weitz was still finishing New Moon when Eclipse began filming, leading David Slade to take over as director. Previous to Eclipse, Slade solely directed gritty and disturbing films like Hard Candy and 30 Days of Night. Summit chose Slade because of this, hoping he would create a “complex, visually arresting world,” as they described it in their 2009 official press release. While Slade brought a darker tone to Eclipse, the film suffered in its portrayal of Bella, who seemed more passive and confused, caught between Jacob and Edward. This shift in focus, from the internal struggles of the characters to more surface-level action sequences, is where the magic of the first film began to dissipate.

In Hardwicke’s Twilight, Bella’s perspective of Forks is misty and lulling, reflecting her remembrance of the town from when she was a child. There's a certain awe to Forks, the Cullen family, and budding romance between Edward and Bella. Even amid conflict, there was a lingering sense of wonder. As the films progressed, however, that distinct storytelling faded. The blues become auburn and shift to gray, much like the narrative. Some might argue this reflects the maturing of the theme, but I believe it reflects the later directors’ lack of connection to the source material. Hardwicke and screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg fought to give Bella more agency and have her be a “little less passive than she was in the book,” as Hardwicke described. Rather than focusing on the internal and emotional conflict the main characters face, later directors indulge more in the action of the books.

Despite the disappointing predecessors to the first film, Hardwicke remains positive about her work on the Twilight set. “As a director, you work so hard; you pour your heart into so many projects; some of them get made, some of them never get made,” Hardwicke explained. “This one got made, and people loved it and appreciated every little detail. I mean, people are wearing the shoes that Bella wore and asking how you chose this and that, and they really care about the love and attention that filmmakers put into it.” Even though she wasn’t able to continue directing the series, her impact on the franchise is enduring and continues to be admired by fans.

In the end, while the saga might have evolved in ways that didn’t always meet my expectations, Twilight will always hold a special place for me. And every fall, I return to Forks, finding comfort in the nostalgia and magic of that first film.

[firephoenix2305]

This is a Rory Williams appreciation post

Because I have recently finished season 6 and I need to shout about it to someone.

(Disclaimer: Severe season 5 and 6 spoilers ahead. If you haven't watched them yet, run away very very fast. Or don't, it's up to you. But you have been warned)

Okay, don't get me wrong. I love Amy, she's great. And I love The Doctor, because well, he's The Doctor, and also Matt Smith, so he's great too.

But.

But. But. But

If I had to pick a favorite...

Rory. Fucking.Arthur. Williams.

I don't even know where to start with this man.

The way he loves Amy. The way he cares about her more than the entire goddamn universe. The way he DOES NOT BUDGE from her side even when she kisses another man the night before their wedding, then proceeds to severely third-wheel him in a very Mickey Smith sort of way for the better part of two episodes (which in retrospect isn't really that much, but STILL) and takes her sweet time to realize she is in love with him.

We are talking, ladies and gentlemen, about the Last goddamn Centurion. This is a man who willingly lived through every single second of 2000 years of human history only to protect Amy Pond. 2000 years without so much as a wink of sleep, or rest, or any synonym of the word. How does this man's heart not physically burst from the sheer amount of love he has for Amy?!?!

I just...I want one. I want a Rory. Does anybody know where I can find a Rory? Pretty please?

And another thing. I'm not sure what it was that Rory did to the writers of this show but JESUS CHRIST. Why so much hate?

And just to prove I'm not even exaggerating, here's a brief summary of some of the things which have happened to this poor guy in seasons 5 and 6. (From the point where he officially joins Amy and The Doctor in the TARDIS onwards, that is)

- S5E7. Killed by the Eknodine in the Dream Lord's fake reality. (And given that horrible ponytail, btw)

- S5E9. Murdered in cold blood by a rogue Silurian, then absorbed by a time crack and hence deleted from the memory of the entire universe. (Being murdered obviously wasn't enough, no)

- S5E13. This is a big one. Revived as an Auton, realized Amy doesn't remember him, then when Amy finally does remember he unwillingly kills her because of his programming (which he eventually breaks free from), stays with the Pandorica for 2000 odd years and finally, after all of that, gets erased from reality. Again. (But it's okay because The Doctor has rebooted the universe, so real Rory came back. Or, rather, never left in the first place. Doctor Who is complicated, okay?!)

- S6E3. To start off the season well, he drowns and practically dies, and is then transferred to a spaceship healing facility where he is essentially hooked to a live support system until Amy brings him back to life.

- S6E4. Tortured and "killed" by the thing controlling the TARDIS, who had a blast warping time and making him go crazy and ultimately making him die of old age. (Not sure if it even counts as a death, but his rotting skeleton was there, so I'm counting it)

- S6E6. Finds out that his wife is not actually his wife but is instead a bunch of sentient flesh which is pretending to be his wife; and that his actual wife is nine months pregnant and currently giving birth to their daughter God knows where. (I did say it was complicated).

- S6E7. Finds Amy and baby Melody, only to lose Melody to the creepy eye patch lady because having lost Amy in the exact same way the previous episode clearly wasn't enough torture for him.

- S6E10. Has "other" Amy (the older version) absolutely hate his guts for something which isn't his fault at all, and has to re-convince her that she loves him. Again. (Seriously, Amy?). Then, he has to sacrifice the other Amy to save his Amy, which was extremely painful for him. (Man, this season gets weirder and weirder, doesn't it?)

- S6E13. Suffers inhumane amounts of pain and almost dies (again) when he lets himself be electrocuted by the eye patch thingy to give Amy, River and The Doctor time to escape. (I know this wasn't technically the same Rory that went through all those other things, but I decided to include it anyway)

AND I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED SEASON 7 YET. Give the man a break! And stop killing him, for God's sake!

(I know this won't happen, because although I haven't watched S7 I accidentally spoiled the whole weeping angel business to myself, so yeah)

And lastly, this scene >>>

Do. Not. Fuck. With the roman.

I just love him.

That is all. Thanks for hearing me out, I feel better.

(@capinejghafa was the furthest back I could track these gifs, but I don't know if they were the one who made them).

[tea-earl-grey]

I know absolutely nothing about Dr Who. But your post about the different gods has more than caught my attention. What is the story of the Toymaker, Trickster, Maestro, and Mara? I didn’t realize that dr who met so many gods.

thank you so much for asking and i'm so sorry in advance for how long this is going to be but the special interest took over my body.

ok so to start with if you don't know literally anything about Doctor Who – there are a lot of different pieces of media that comprise the overall franchise/canon. there's Doctor Who (2005-present) which is what most people refer to when they say Doctor Who as it's the most present in pop culture. but the show actually started in 60s and the original series ran from 1963 to 1989. to differentiate these two shows, most people call the 2005 version "new who" and the 1963 version "classic who". then in addition to that there are a couple of television spin-offs focusing on characters other than the Doctor – namely the Sarah Jane Adventures, Torchwood, & Class – and a very expansive extended universe taking place across books, audio dramas, and comics.

but even in the TV show itself (new who and classic who), different actors play the Doctor (their species (the Time Lords) can "regenerate" themselves if they die which involves changing their body & personality) so every Doctor's era has a different tone, production value, type of story, etc. Doctors 1-7 make up classic who, Doctors 9-15 make up new who. the Eighth Doctor appears in a 1996 TV movie and a lot of extended universe material. the basic premise of the show generally stays consistent as "alien travels through time and space in a blue box with human (or sometimes alien) companions" but every era has a different take on that premise and people typically click with certain eras more than others. it also means that continuity between eras is kinda fucked up but it's fine, canon is fake :)

and this also means that some eras/spin-offs of Doctor Who lean much more into fantasy than science fiction despite the show being generally classified as scifi. which means gods!!!

the current era of Doctor Who (the Fifteenth Doctor era) is leaning hard into the existence of gods and is kinda canon-welding some other supernatural entities from previous eras together into what's being called the Pantheon of Discord which includes the following entities that we know of:

The Toymaker originally appeared in a First Doctor episode called The Celestial Toymaker which i would not recommend watching unless you're really committed for a multitude of reasons but the Toymaker is still a cool character who was recently featured in the show's 60th anniversary (as played by Neil Patrick Harris) in an episode called The Giggle. his whole shtick is being this omnipotent being that is obsessed with games but can only act through the rules of a game.

The Trickster is from one of the spin-off shows (the Sarah Jane Adventures) and he doesn't fit super neatly into being "god of traps" as the latest season stylized him but was a recurring antagonist of the show who could essentially control anything but only by making deals through mortals. also his design is incredibly cool for the mid 2000s.

The Maestro has only appeared in one episode thus far – The Devil's Chord in the most recent season – but they're the embodiment of music and played to the height of camp by a cool drag queen (Jinkx Monsoon). the whole episode is a lot of fun and i highly recommend watching it as a one-off.

The Mara appeared in two Fifth Doctor episodes (Kinda and Snakedance) & a few extended universe stories and was stylized as "god of beasts" but i'd argue it more represents facets of chaos & control. it's a giant snake that can worm its way into people's minds and take control of them. there's probably more to it but to be honest it's been a long while since i've seen its episodes though i remember them being good.

some other gods/godlike beings aside from the ones you asked about are:

Sutekh, the god of death, first appeared in a Fourth Doctor episode called Pyramids of Mars and later plays an Important Role in the latest season of new who which i won't spoil for you.

The Beast: appeared in a Tenth Doctor story made up of two episodes called The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit where the Doctor finds a small group of humans exploring a planet mysteriously orbiting a black hole. they later find out that the literal devil is imprisoned beneath the surface and is trying to break out.

The Guardians: we mostly see the Black Guardian (embodiment of chaos) and the White Guardian (embodiment of order) in the show itself (mostly in Fourth & Fifth Doctor episodes) who can't directly interfere with the universe but often end up sending the Doctor & their companions to do their dirty work. they also wear birds on their head for some reason. 80s costume design does things.

The Gods of Ragnarok: i have them labeled in this gifset as "the Threefold Deity" but that was more of a headcanon based on a name in a recent episode. the Gods of Ragnarok themselves appear in a Seventh Doctor episode called The Greatest Show of the Galaxy where they've taken up residence in a space circus and force people to perform for them and kill the performer once they're no longer entertaining. the whole episode was a heavy handed metaphor about the BBC limiting creative freedom and i love it dearly.

Fenris: another Seventh Doctor foe appearing in the episode "the Curse of Fenris" where Fenris is a bearer of the apocalypse chained away but trying to break free by summoning vampires and manipulating people's beliefs.

Omega: not quite a god but an ancient Time Lord (the Doctor's people) who created time travel but sacrificed his life to do so imprisoning him inside a black hole where he has total control over his realm but can never leave as his body decayed millennia ago. he first appeared in a Third Doctor Episode called "The Three Doctors" (the 10th anniversary episode) and since appeared a few more times in classic who & the extended universe. there are also a couple of Time Lord characters who stylized themselves as gods.

there are so many other supernatural/godlike beings that appear in the extended universe that i can't begin to name all of them.

anyways – if this super convoluted answer to what seemed like a straightforward ask compelled you at all to watch Doctor Who, i'd recommend jumping in with the latest season (either on Disney+ or your local pirating site) starting with The Church on Ruby Road. i'd also recommend the 60th anniversary specials (The Star Beast, Wild Blue Yonder, The Giggle) if you want a little more supernatural stuff and don't mind being confused at some of the continuity. i'd also be happy to recommend some other one-off episodes.

if you're more committed to watching, i'd recommend just starting with season 1 of new who (available on HBO or whatever they're calling it nowadays/DVD/various pirating sites) and working your way through. the show has some bad episodes but overall it's quite good.

if you're at all into campy low-budget old scifi shows, then classic who is good but also a bit difficult to get into. i'd recommend watching season 16 (with the Fourth Doctor) to get a bit of a taste as the episodes are all pretty good and there's a continuous storyline across the season unlike most classic who seasons.

[stellanslashgeode]

Also you ever heard of the New Sith Wars period of Star Wars? It's a super underrated and underutilized period of Star Wars. The New Sith Wars was a long but diverse series of conflicts opposing the Jedi and the Republic to the Sith, that had been ressurected by Darth Ruin, an Umbaran who had been a Jedi Master before leaving the order to recreating the Sith with many former Jedi that followed him in his departure and dark side cults and distant remnants of the previous Sith Empires.

The New Sith Wars lasted for a millenia, between 2000 BBY and 1000 BBY, with the Sith taking many incarnations, being often divided and fighting against each other as much as they did against the Republic and the Jedi due to infighting, clashing ambitions and conflicting ideologies. Darth Ruin, the Dark Underlord, Darth Rivan, Belia Darzu and Skere Kaan were the most notable Sith Lords and leaders of the Sith during these conflicts.

In the last century of the wars, the Republic had lost so much territory with two thirds of the known galaxy being conquered by the Sith, and the economic, political, technological regression in many parts of the galaxy (with the Outer Rim being cut of the Holonet, and many fighters using medieval weapons to fight) being caused by it that it was called the Republic Dark Age. The Republic was saved by the Jedi who took drastic and desperate measures such as taking control of the Republic with the Supreme Chancellor position being held by a Jedi master for several centuries, and the creation of the Jedi Lords, Jedi leaders and warlords who ruled over entire planets, systems or sectors and had direct control of the Republic armies; as well as the conscription of Force-sensitive children; and by the Sith divisions and infighting which prevented them from delivering the Coup de grace to the Republic and the Jedi.

The end of the war saw the Sith finally being unified by a charismatic former Jedi named Skere Kaan, who was a master of battle meditation and created the Brotherhood of Darkness, claiming that all Sith Lords were equals while in truth being their supreme leader, and abolishing the Darth title. Kaan and his Brotherhood of Darkness were locked into a mortal feud with the Jedi Lord Hoth, also a master of battle meditation and tactical genius, and his Army of Light. However one of the Sith called Bane become disillusioned with the Brotherhood of Darkness and reclaimed the title of Darth to call himself Darth Bane, and imagining the Rule of Two.

At the Seventh Battle of Ruusan Darth Bane manipulated Skere Kaan and the rest of the Sith into backing themselves into a corner, and into detonating an ancient Sith superweapon called the Thought Bomb, causing them to destroy themselves and Lord Hoth and most of his army in one of the most terrible battles in Star Wars history. With the Sith seemingly gone for good, the war ended and the Republic reclaimed most of the galaxy, with the new Supreme Chancellor Tarsus Valorum instauring the Ruusan Reformations that demilitarized the Republic and officially instated the Jedi as part of the Republic's judiciary system. Unknown to them, one Sith, Darth Bane of course had surived and he took a young Jedi named Rain as his apprentice Darth Zannah, starting the Rule of Two and the Sith Grand Plan to would triumph over the Jedi a millenia later.

It's a super interesting section of Star Wars lore. Basically the Star Wars equivalent of the thirty years war or Sengoku Jidai or Crisis of the Third Century. Ten centuries of endless war and hopelessness with trillions dying on the battlefield.

I am familiar with it! But mostly though sifting Wookiepedia articles than reading the old Dark Horse comics and novels. I should read the Darth Bane books, eventually.

I think after The High Republic is done the publishing initiative should revisit this era. It's existence in canon is murky at the moment, but Darth Bane is definitely canon having appeared in TCW and Malachor taking the place of the Thought Bomb. The ancient war with the Sith is canon and I've made references to the Ruusan Accords in my fanfiction. It is a great space to explore right now. It is a very Star Warsy time period. I think the best improvement to be made if expanded upon in new canon would be to make the conflict less like The Clone Wars and the Imperial Era. It should have that medieval siege feeling. Dark Age indeed.

[likeabxrdinflight]

I definitely miss when the crown was more political, but I guess they were too scared to touch the politics of the 90s and 2000s too much, given it's all still very recent. tony blair really could have been a much more prominent character given how much they highlighted figures like churchill and thatcher and even anthony eden in previous seasons. some of the bigger historical moments are handwaved away too, when JFK and the suez crisis and aberfan and even the fog from the 1950s got entire episodes. it's very odd to me that there wasn't a 9/11 or iraq episode that dealt with how the fallout of all that was handled for blair. honestly it could have been two episodes at least, and previous seasons would have done it. they gave the suez crisis like, three or four episodes. thatcher got several dedicated to her and the falklands and managed to balance that with the diana story just fine.

the past two seasons really became the diana show, however, and the entire thing suffered for it. the main subject, elizabeth herself, was relegated to a background character. imelda staunton just didn't get the material to work with that her predecessors did. it really felt like the show lost some of its teeth. and like, yes, elizabeth debicki did incredible as diana, but lord they dragged that story out far too long and ultimately I think the show suffered for it. they let the interpersonal drama between charles, diana, and camilla consume everything else and the show really lost something of itself for it. even diana herself gets kind of screwed over for this- her story becomes about her failed marriage and relationship drama, and not any of the other incredible things she did with her life.

all that said, this last batch of episodes were still a lot better than season five and six part one. it finally put the focus back on elizabeth and gave imelda something to do. the margaret episode was incredible. there was at least some return of the politics, albeit I still think they missed the mark with blair. but I think the show ends on an interesting note, one I think a lot of people felt at the time of the actual queen's death- that the show's over, and it's never going to be the same after her. whatever becomes of the real monarchy, it's not going to be the same. elizabeth held that shit together with sheer force of will and glue, and I have my doubts that it will still be intact at the end of my lifetime- I think peter morgan does, too, though he seems a bit sadder about it than I am.

also I am positive the last couple scenes, and possibly a good chunk of that last episode, were re-written and shot after the real elizabeth died. but what they did with that was...I could see some people finding it tacky, but I thought it was nice. so while I think the last two seasons were overall weaker, it mostly stuck the landing. good show, interesting reflection on the monarchy, had it's issues, but good, generally. made you think a bit.

and I will say, and I've said this before, that the show is overall a bit wishy-washy on its opinion of the monarchy. I think that's still true. but it very much is, and always was, about the way the crown kills the people who get too close to it. and this last season was no different- I've said before that season one was about the slow death of a young woman named elizabeth windsor, murdered by elizabeth regina.

season six outright states that, and in many ways, I think that was the thesis of the entire show. the crown kills the personhood of the one who wears it and harms everyone in its immediate vicinity. what that means, exactly, and whether there's a good purpose behind it, might be left up to the viewer to decide.