#and the number of times the narration is just like 'yeah and then this random group of people did xyz through their wizardry'

[rohirric-hunter]

As per usual I'm complaining, but it drives me nuts when people act like magic in LotR is the sole purview of the Maiar. I see it a lot in LotRO circles, with people complaining about the magical classes and claiming they're not lore-friendly. Dead giveaway that they've never so much as read the Hobbit, let alone LotR or the Silmarillion.

A personal favorite was someone on the forums who would go about complaining about the Rune-keeper class, claiming they could do things that Gandalf and Saruman could only dream of. Absolutely unhinged thing to say. I can only assume their issue was that the Rune-keeper skills tend to be visually very flashy. I should be embarrassed to publicly admit online that I had mistaken "louder and flashier" for "more powerful."

[alchemistc]

You never let me in, Buck sends, two of three sheets fully winded, and when he kicks his leg over the coffee table he nearly knocks over three empties.

They do this thing, right? Buck gets upset and before the tears can fall, because he's cried too many fucking times already, he makes himself angry. Picks at something that has come up every time he's done a post-mortem on the last six months.

And then he sends that shit to Tommy. Because - because who the fuck else is he supposed to talk to about it? The guy who'd sucked him off in the hallway of a nightclub two weeks ago? The woman who'd spent an hour quietly helping Buck understand that yeah, he was very much bi, and yeah, some people did not like that shit? Maddie, or Chim, or Hen or Eddie, who still might interact with him on the job? Bobby? Fuck, not Bobby.

Bobby who'd blinked at Buck and offered platitudes and apologized to Buck like it was somehow his fault Tommy was good people but he was the kind of good people who just walked out on something that could have been something.

I should have pushed more. I know I should have. I just thought since I was trying to share everything, you were too.

My mistake.

Three months and Buck isn't over it. He's far enough into the mourning process that he thinks this one is always gonna sting, and not for the reasons Tommy thinks.

That's not fair. I'm sorry.

The texts get delivered. Tommy reads them. Buck's had read receipts on since the first time Tommy went quiet on a call and Buck freaked out a little - but back then they were still working towards something. Back then, sometimes Tommy would pull out his phone and open the thread just to give Buck sign of life.

He was always doing that. Heading shit off at the pass.

Buck had just never realized he'd be able to do it to hurt him, just as well as take care of him.

Every four weeks like clockwork Buck gets a response. He has no fucking idea why it's four weeks, what the third Thursday of the month has to do with Tommy feeling gracious enough to give Buck some clarity. He'd never known enough about Tommy, is the thing he's coming around to. He'd done everything he could to bring Tommy in, make him a part, and Tommy had let him. Tommy had distracted him with quippy words and a clever tongue and with being so fucking willing to be integrated into Buck's life that Buck just - hadn't noticed.

No one will say it, but he Bucked It Up in the worst kind of way.

He's waited until Third Thursday to send these texts. He actually hasn't sent anything at all, until this moment, and he wonders if Tommy noticed. If he cared. Tommy picks and chooses from Buck's random thoughts, parses out details like he's reading from a manual and Buck is off topic two thirds of the time. Buck doesn't actually know why he's been answering, all this time. He wonders if, in the last four weeks of silence, he thought he was finally done with Buck.

He wonders if it had hurt.

Buck sets his phone down to stand, skating across to the kitchen in his socks for the pizza rolls in the oven.

His diet is shit. His body feels like crap. He's one more drunken nights sleep on the couch away from emptying the rack in his fridge down the drain and giving sobriety a try. The last person he'd slept with had hinted that they'd prefer not to use condoms and Buck had almost let them.

Buck has worth. He knows he does. It's just sometimes when he remembers that every person he's ever loved has either walked out on him or let him walk away when he needed them, he struggles to find that worth.

His life has meaning, and all that jazz.

Buck sort of wonders if Tommy hasn't finally blocked his number, as he tosses a too-hot pizza roll in his mouth and huffs on the lava cheese burning his tongue. After the last message Buck had sent, three weeks ago, he wouldn't exactly be surprised.

(This is basically just an unhinged grief journal with an unreliable second narrator. Do you know what it's like to realize you're still in love with someone who never let you know them?)

There's been no response to that. Fair. Buck hadn't even actually said the words. No, he'd jumped right into the sharing a life part, cart before the horse as always when emotions were high.

The pizza rolls get tipped onto a plate and are immediately swimming in the heavy pour of ranch he'd prepared after he set the oven to preheat.

It cools them off a lot quicker than popping a hole in each seam and waiting.

It's been eight years since Buck has really even thought about that little trick.

When he opens his phone there's no response. No receipt. Just stark words waiting to be acknowledged.

I gave you my family, Tommy. You didn't even introduce me to your team at Harbor.

It's startling to realize after the fact. He doubts Tommy had meant it that way, but he'd basically spent six months being love bombed only to have the rug ripped right out from under his feet.

And yet. Months later and he still wants to know. Know why. Know how he could have done it, with tears in his eyes, with full awareness that it was already gonna hurt. Know Tommy - anything he'd part with, really, that wasn't something every random acquaintance also knew.

Cool, he'd been jealous of what Buck and the 118 had. (Buck had tried to give him that. Or at least he thought he had.)

Great, he didn't talk to his dad and Gerrard was a shitty captain. (Buck had spent an hour once explaining the first time he and his dad had spoken about Daniel without screaming at each other. Tommy had listened to the rants about Gerrard and offered physical comfort and a 'sounds like him' and Buck had just been so relieved to have an ally amongst the 'life is just like this sometimes' crowd that he'd never examined that.)

He was a Kinsey six who'd been engaged to the first woman Buck had ever really loved and they'd never dug deeper than that.

And Buck had apparently interpreted some of the shit he'd said that night wrong, but he still doesn't think it's fucking fair that Tommy can't trust him to know his own fucking mind well enough to know he hates sleeping around and he'd found the sort of connection he was looking for. He'd found it. Even with the lack of reciprocation. Even with the quiet behind Tommy's eyes that he'd never let Buck in on. Even with the -

His phone buzzes on the coffee table.

Can we talk?

Buck kinda hates those words in that order now. They'd been the start of something twice, but they'd always been leading to an end, if Tommy had his way.

Once every four weeks, apparently, Buck sends back and takes a vicious bite.

His phone chimes with an incoming call.

Buck stares at the name he hasn't had the stomach to remove the little heart from. Lets it ring through to voicemail and then shoves three more pizza rolls into his mouth and doesn't care if they burn off his taste buds.

His phone rings again.

"What?"

"I'm outside your building. Didn't want to make any assumptions that I'd be welcome without asking first."

Buck can feel his ribs cracking under the lurch of angry laughter. "What the hell?"

"Well the parking around here is miserable again, so I figure that's a sign."

"Are you driving right now?"

"Hands off. I'm on Bluetooth. So. Should I circle the building a fifth time or call it now and go home?"

Buck gets stuck on fifth time.

There's no way he hadn't been driving since at least before Buck sent that first text.

Buck sighs. There's absolutely no reason to be hopeful about that. For all he knows, Tommy has just decided dousing any residual flames is just another thing he has to do in person.

"My Jeep's in the shop. I'll buzz you into the garage."

Tommy's silent for a long, long moment. The quip comes anyway. "I keep telling you that thing is a money pit."

"I'm not really feeling the flirty banter, right now, Tommy, so maybe just let me know when you're at the gate."

He does. He hangs up the phone twenty seconds later with a plain "See you soon."

Buck doesn't have time to change. Fix his hair. Hide the sheet pan with half a dozen pizza rolls still laying on it, because he'd cooked way too many again.

(He could absolutely do one of these things but if Tommy's gonna throw this at him, he's getting every little slovenly habit Bucks's picked up since he walked out that door.)

The knock comes while Buck's shoving the last two rolls on his plate into his mouth.

He's still chewing with his mouth open to blow out the steam when he swings the door open, and Buck feels the first inklings of pleasure ripple through him at the sight of Tommy.

He looks like shit.

"You look like shit."

Tommy's brow ticks up. He stares pointedly at the glob of not-cheese that's going to absolutely ruin this sweatshirt.

"That tends to happen when you spend an hour in an armchair two sizes too small picking at trauma you've been hiding from your therapist for six years."

Buck opens the door wider. Holy crap. Tommy might legitimately be more fucked up than Buck.

Tommy's smile is strained. "Can I come in?"

Buck holds his gaze. His eyes are a little red. He's got a red spot along the side of his neck, like he's been rubbing at it. Buck only recognizes it as a comforting motion because he's replayed him doing it half a million times right before he ended things.

"Depends. Is this the last time you respond to my mean, rude, asshole texts for an hour after therapy rubs you raw?" Third Thursday Therapy, is apparently what does it. Buck is - god. He just wants -

"God, I hope not," Tommy says, and Buck takes a step to the side to let Tommy in.

[heart2beom]

call you later

pairing: beomgyu x f!reader

synopsis: beomgyu swears women fall at his feet and he's in fact, single by choice—what better way to prove this to you than collecting the numbers of random people on the street?

you're in on the little fun too, until you manage to get soobin's number. because suddenly, beomgyu's a debbie downer—for whatever reason.

genre: comedy, fluff, best friends to lovers

a/n: late beomgyu bday fic...and its cheesy as hell 😭😭 anyways, nobody understands how happy i got after finding these icons, its literally perfect. this is exactly how he looks in the fic !!!! also lol this is practically me gushing over beomgyu while writing, its so self indulgent

You don't know how this became topic of conversation for the hundredth time this week. After the events of the failed attempt of trying to get your upperclassman's number, Yeonjun—Beomgyu has been talking nonstop on how he's the most qualified person in your life that could hand you flirting tips, completely dismissing the fact that he's been single for the past two years.

He stops walking when you remind him that very necessary piece of information he seems to forget a little too often. "It's by choice! I'm single by choice!" you hear him yell. You don't pay him any mind, scrolling through your phone as you continue to walk.

He catches up to you rather quickly, hands in pockets as he walks backwards facing you, brown hair prickling his eyes because of the wind. "Do you seriously believe I can't get dates?"

You shove your phone back in your pocket, providing him with your full attention.

"Would you believe me if I said yes?" you enjoy how his hand shoot up to go over his chest, fauxing hurt with a huge pout—you've been telling him he'd do well majoring in theatre arts.

"You've lost your charm Choi, your age's getting to you."

He cracks a smile of disbelief, before continuing on, "I'm twenty-one not eighty-one knucklehead."

Beomgyu turns from facing you, walking by your side again. He clicks his tongue before saying, "You'd think that the closest people to Beomgyu would know him by now."

"Oh no, you're speaking in third person again." you whine.

He'd do this entire thing of narrating his life when he deems it necessary—which really should be never. It's also another reason why you're convinced theatre is his second calling—second to his very dramatic declaration of love to music.

"Yeah, because my best friend in the entire world thinks I'm a loser!"

He wasn't too far off. "Okay, I'll be honest. I do think you're a loser—"

"You're a loser." he retaliates.

"I was just about to compliment you!"

"How was I supposed to know? You don't follow an insult with a compliment, that's like, against the rules of socializing!"

You opt to narrow your eyes at Beomgyu instead of replying, taking the silence route. Beomgyu returns your glare, before huffing.

A few steps without anyone speaking until, "The compliment..." he mutters around a fake cough.

You snap your head to the brunette, lips slightly parted at his shameless attempt of getting a compliment. You punch his shoulder lightly before laughing a little in disbelief but also in a familiar knowing way—Beomgyu's always been like this.

When he gives you a shrug paired with childish pout as to say 'it wouldn't hurt', you give in, sighing. "I was about to say that I think you're handsome but you ruined that dipshit."

It's quiet again, and usually, you'd look to your side, trying to relish in your friend's reaction — it's always so reactive, animated in a way that makes the receiving end feel happy despite the context — but you don't, instead, your eyes were focused on the path you were walking on. It was wide, the greenery of spring occupying both sides, aftermath of the disastrous, lonely winter completely dissolved.

"You do?"

You almost laugh before his tone set on you a little more; his voice was lower, and you felt his eyes hesitantly looking at you, almost like he's genuinely looking for your affirmation.

You choose to look back at him, pursing your lips as you pretend to study the features you've grown accustomed to for the past five years.

You do think he's handsome—it's a given, even now, his bare skin devoid of any noticeable acne scars, lively and clear, his lashes—though a contrast to his boyish charm—so pretty and long you often find yourself feel a little envious whenever your finger would brush over them in awe. And god, if you could even begin to describe the way his lips—

He scoffs, turning away from your stare, pulling you out of your own thoughts. You blink a few times, before also tearing your eyes from the man walking beside you.

You went on too long without saying anything, how embarrassing. Clearing your throat you say, "I do."

He sighs. "You took too long to say that, I don't believe you."

You roll your eyes—you know what he wants. "I think you're handsome, Beomgyu."

You're not taken by surprise when he throws his arm over your shoulders, a teasing smile annoyingly plastered on his face as he shoves it a little too close, forcing you to look at him — you wouldn't complain anyway. "Awe, is little Y/N realizing Beomgyu's the love of her life, her soulmate, her beloved—"

"You're pushing it," you whine trying to push his face away, though the smile on your face is hard to hide. "I just called you handsome, it's not like I'm blind."

To the wanderers around you, the ones sitting on benches enjoying the view of cherry blossoms, they'd assume Beomgyu was your boyfriend with the way he had his arm comfortably laying off your shoulder.

"I'm not just a pretty face Y/N. In fact, I'm so cool that I could get the number of the first girl that passes me."

"No, no you couldn't."

Beomgyu naturally takes this as a challenge when he scoffs, finally removing his arm from you, "Watch me."

That's how it started. The ten minute stroll to get the park's infamous ice cream turning into something way bigger than it originally was.

"Her." you say, one hand on the rough bark of the tree you both were hiding behind, another used to discreetly point at the woman who had a child on her lap, clearly busy as she yelled on the phone.

Beomgyu was directly behind you, his head over yours, as he tries to get a good look of who you were pointing at.

"Are you crazy? She has a kid!" he whisper shouts, though the situation really didn't call for it. The woman was at the least three yards away from the tree you guys were behind.

"I thought love knows no bounds."

That seems to get him, using his beloved philosophy against him.

"It—it does if she's married!"

"You're so traditional. People can raise their kids on their own."

When he doesn't budge, unconvinced of taking such a chance, you turn to face him. Which is a mistake because now you realize how close he was. You clear your throat, dismissing the way the proximity was weirdly effecting you. "You lost. Bet's done."

"What? No! I have seventeen numbers and you have like...five. You lost, fair and square."

"This isn't fair! You made me ask an old man for his number, I had to stay there for twenty entire minutes just so he could type it in!"

"I'm not going Y/N, nothing you can do can convince me." he says, eyes shut as he childishly crosses his arms, head turned to the side, chin up high.

You glare at him before shoving your hand down your jeans pocket for spare change—surprisingly feeling paper. When you pull out the mysterious object, your eyes widen at seeing a twenty dollar bill. You've never gotten this lucky before!

It was too late to shove it back in because Beomgyu opens an eye to peek at what you were doing, noticing the bill you had in your hand.

You look at the boy, who was wide-eyed, then back to your very lucky money. "Fuck..." you groan, slapping the bill on his palm, internally mourning the loss of your money.

"You work miracles Y/N." he says cheekily. You deadpan, which gets the man holding up his hands as defense, flashing the money he just got out of you, with a teasing smile before he proudly turns to approach the woman.

Was that even worth your money?

Chewing slightly on your bottom lip, you observe through narrowed eyes—you can't really make out what he's saying, but the woman's brows were furrowed. Not a good sign.

A smirk makes way on your face as you lean against the tree, arms crossed.

Beomgyu still wears a smile, saying something again. You think that's the end of it, he apologized for bothering her and failed— but that isn't what happens.

Your smirk slowly falls when you see him typing something in his phone.

There's no way.

Before leaving, he gives the kid on the woman's lap a high five.

No way.

"You got her number?!" you shout in disbelief when he's finally in front of you.

"Keep it down!"

You're impatient, waiting for his response to your question, but with the way he had his chin raised proudly, hands in pocket, you got the answer.

You blink a few times, trying to piece your shock together. "But how? She's married! She—"

He gasps before pointing an accusatory finger at you. "I knew you saw that ring! You were trying to embarrass me!" you don't reply, instead just crossing your arms, huffing. "But see who came out on top? This guy." he turns his finger from you to himself, a smile of accomplishment spread on his face.

"Okay, I get it. But is she seriously cheating on her spouse while having a kid? That's fucking messed up."

"I just asked her where I could get the best cakes. She said BonBon's Bakery, which is, like, thirty minutes away."

You narrow your eyes, mouth wide—he can't just do this! "You didn't get her number! You—you tricked me!"

"Yes I did, and I'm proud." He says, walking to go behind you again, searching for your next victim.

You sigh, "Why'd you ask that anyway?"

"What, the cake? Because my birthday's soon idiot."

Oh yeah, his birthday.

"Go up to... the the blonde one! Wait, no, nevermind."

You furrow your brows, "Why'd you just take that back?"

He's quick to reply, "No reason. Oh! Go up to him."

You don't bother to look at who he was pointing at now, instead focusing your attention on the blonde Beomgyu had previously pointed at.

He had a pair of sony headphones, walking, eyes glued to his phone. "Soobin." the name slips out your lips absentmindedly as your eyes follow his figure.

"The random guy I'm pointing at is Soobin?" Beomgyu asks scratching his head, playing dumb.

No, the random guy he's pointing at is a middle aged man with a bald spot. You get into action, quickly walking at the direction of Soobin, who was by now, very far.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Beomgyu's hand is on your wrist, making you turn your head back to him. You tilt your head. "Going up to Soobin and getting his number?"

He breaks into an uneasy smile. "But you know him. That's an unfair advantage."

"I don't know him, you know him. I'm playing on fair grounds." you say, a little confused on why he was caring about advantages anyway—Beomgyu had double the numbers you had, he was winning.

When he doesn't let go, you decide to just shake his loose hold on you, chuckling awkwardly, giving him one last look before trying to catch up to the blonde.

Beomgyu never felt so much nervousness as he waited behind the tree, watching the scene unfold between you and his other best friend, Soobin.

His eyes fall down to see the scattered dandelions in the grass. He gulps before quickly bending down to pluck one out. It's a little childish—the way he holds the flower close to his lips, blowing air with all his force, making sure the dandelion is devoid of any white fluff. Wishing that your beyond terrible flirting skills would be so unflattering that Soobin would reject you.

Which is not the case.

When Soobin bashfully waves, a small smile on his face as he turns away from you, walking away—Beomgyu finds out at the age of twenty-one, that wishing upon a dandelion was a hoax. It's further rubbed in his face when you skip towards him, a wide smile on your face.

He drops the dead flower, pursing his lips as he steps on it.

"Guess who just got a number." you sing-song, waving your phone at him.

"Haha, congrats." he manages to smile, rolling his eyes.

"I'm going to catch up to you and win, be scared." you threaten though, your tone a little too excited, full of pride. Was this how Beomgyu felt on an hour basis? Because god, does it feel great.

"I think we should stop here for today."

You snap your head to Beomgyu, brows furrowed. "What? No!"

"We've been here for more than two hours, my legs are tired." he whines with a pout.

You take notice of your surroundings— the once blue sky was now a deep shade of orange, the park was a lot more empty, only a couple people walking down the path.

Yeah, you should definitely go home now.

"We're ending this formally tomorrow, 6PM sharp. Whoever has the most numbers gets fifty from the loser."

He nods before holding out his hand. "Deal."

You shake it, "Deal."

Though you smiled, you couldn't help but feel as if Beomgyu's mood had taken a complete 180.

You dismiss it—he probably is just tired.

Movie Sundays—epitome of the typical movie nerd enthusiasts gathering around one TV screen on a specific day, in a specific time and binging 70's shit that is no longer relevant in today's society.

When you open your door, it's typical Beomgyu with his plaid shirt over his plain white one, barging into your apartment like he was your roommate and comfortably following through his usual routine.

"Take off your shoes you hooligan." It's a little ridiculous how often you have to remind him, but that seems to be apart of the routine too.

"It's literally just crocs."

"Yeah, crocs that stepped in dog shit on the way here."

"You're so dramatic." he mumbles, but still takes them off anyway. You would've shot back with a 'funny coming from you' but routine calls, so, you let him go.

You go to your bedroom, fetching a couple pillows before going back to the couch.

Movie Sundays often ended with both of you losing track of time, slipping into deep sleep the moment the clock struck midnight.

It was never your intention to make this movie ordeal into a sleepover on your couch, but that's usually what ended up happening, so preparing for it is always a good idea. Waking up with sore necks proved to be the official worst way to start a day—you'd know.

It's also the reason why Movie Sundays are now held on Saturdays—the change being made around three years ago. It's ridiculous, some would think that by now, you'd call it Movie Saturdays but Beomgyu said that it'd 'take away the magic' if you did — whatever that meant.

"Did you run out of water bottles?" he yells from the kitchen.

"I don't know, check the fridge!"

Beomgyu was tasked with getting the snacks and some water, you didn't have to do much compared to him but he seemed to enjoy getting the autonomy so nobody minded.

"Your fridge is so dystopian." Beomgyu comments, plopping beside you on the couch, throwing you a packet of cheespuffs.

"Wow, how incredibly nice of you to say as a guest."

"I'm being serious though, you have ten rows of mountain dew and ...one egg carton? You're like the stereotypical college student"

You're focused on finding something to watch instead of paying any mind to Beomgyu's rambles—who really tended to say anything. Like right now, when he pinches your cheek seemingly out of nowhere.

"You're so cute." he coos like you were a newborn baby—it truly felt as if Beomgyu was experiencing effects of anesthesia during the process of you finding a movie. You send him a death glare but that only spurs him on as he whines, "See? That was so cute"

You ignore him, finally making the decision of what movie could start off your move marathon. You nudge his shoulder, tearing his attention from his phone. "Hey, how about this one?"

The good thing about picking Beomgyu for your movie ventures was that you guys had similar tastes.

Romcoms. The classic cliched genre that is filled with the worlds cheesiest tropes.

"Yeah, that's good."

Usually it'd start off with Beomgyu making comments every few minutes, but then they'd die down after the third movie which is exactly why you leave the best movies for last—his yelling would've destroyed your watching experience.

Beomgyu tended to be the one laying his head on the armrest so it didn't take long for his leg to be sprawled on top of your lap—serving as a blanket for you.

You don't mind, focused on the scene playing until the buzz of your phone catches your attention. You hesitantly look at your phone, then Beomgyu, then your phone.

It was like an established rule to be off phones when Move Sundays was in motion, it's just that nobody had decided to say it aloud. But the whines that would come from one person when the other was busy on their phone during a movie served as enough reminder that using your phone was frowned upon.

But you couldn't help it. You've been expecting a call from Soobin for the past week, the day you got his number long over. Any notification from your phone tempted you. Foolishly you'd think it was finally Soobin, but that was never the case.

You were starting to believe that he didn't straight up reject you because of his politeness—which really just felt like shit. Were you seriously that pitiful?

Those thoughts dissipate into nothingness when you see the text notification on your lock screen. Texts from someone you've been readily expecting for the entire week.

[soobin, now]: hi :)

[soobin, now]: sorry for not calling or texting you i was just...

When you click on the notification, you expect to see that the end of the text is 'busy' or something of the sort but instead it's...nervous.

Sorry for not texting you I was just nervous? Why would he be nervous?

You can't help but snort, the ends of your lips curling up at the text.

Before you could quickly come up with a response, Beomgyu's face is right next to yours, narrowing his eyes at your phone screen.

"Who're you texting?"

"Fuck!" you shout, instinctively throwing your phone in shock. Thankfully, the phone lands on a chair instead of the floor, and your breathing is back.

You snap your head to Beomgyu to give him a piece of your mind but then... you remember you technically were the one breaking the unsaid rules of Movie Sundays. You collect your anger, sighing before you hold up a tight lipped smile, "It was an emergency."

When he quirks an eyebrow, you further continue to add onto your lie as you go to get your phone. "My grandpa got a heart attack, it's insane."

He rolls his eyes. "You have a grandpa named Soobin?"

Of course he was fast enough to read the contact name.

"Why'd you even ask if you knew?" you ask, sitting on the couch with your phone in hand.

He ignores your question, eyes focused on the TV. "Just put your phone away, you can text him back later."

You give him a look before shutting off your phone and crossing your arms as you tune back into the movie. Or at least somewhat. You're not sure what's up with Beomgyu and the mention of Soobin—at first, you think it's because they had a fight, but you saw them hanging out just fine the other day.

It was weird, but you shake your head out of your own thoughts, dismissing the boy's crankiness as something you really just made up in your head.

That is, until you decide to check your phone again while he goes through a catalog of movies.

"Are you guys dating?"

The sudden question paired with a dry laugh of his own makes you furrow your eyebrows, clicking on your phone to close it. "Hey, what's your problem?"

"What do you mean what's my problem? I don't have any problems."

You roll your eyes, groaning a little. "Did you guys fight or something?"

"No."

You peer at him for a second, urging him to add something more. It works, as his eyes look at you for a second before going back to the TV. He shrugs, "I don't know, it's just weird."

"What is?"

"You getting close to Soobin."

You're even more confused now...wouldn't someone want their best friends to get along? And be friends?

"I don't get it..." you mumble, still looking at him as he avoids any sort of eye contact. "How's that weird?"

He sighs, shoulders slumping. "He likes you."

When you don't respond, he continues, feeling his mouth dry the more he says it, "Like, like-likes you. He says it's love at first sight."

Ever since his best friend had personally confided in him that he might have the biggest crush on his other best friend, A.K.A the love of his life, Beomgyu had done everything in his power to keep you from formally meeting the blonde. Which included a lot of running and a lot of excuses he had to keep up with.

One, because Soobin was totally your type—Beomgyu would know. Two, because he doesn't think he can survive you falling in love with his best friend. It'd be the ultimate awkward situation. Third wheeling would be his daily routine, and it sends him shuddering at the thought.

You laugh, still trying to piece the information together. "What? Wait. How—why is that weird? I mean, okay. He likes me, so what?"

Beomgyu snaps his head to you, almost as if to tell you 'you should know why!' but he quickly controls his facial expressions because you don't know why. Instead he just opts to pout as he tries to explain. "It's weird because—because, like...um..."

"You're—you're going to hurt his feelings just because of a stupid challenge, that's very cruel Y/N." he says, childishly crossing his arms.

"I'm not going to hurt him...you know I'd never do that!"

"Well, you don't feel the same way he does. It'd be like you're leading him on."

"I mean...I can feel the same way he does, if time allows. I think he's pretty cool, seriously." You try to reassure him, but it has the opposite effect. Beomgyu's eyes droop, almost resembling one of a puppy as he looks up at you.

"You—you like him?"

"I said I think he's cool dummy. And that I think I can learn to like him."

"That's not how liking people works."

You barely control the urge to roll your eyes as your phone was above your face, scrolling through your social media mindlessly. "Sure it does. Taking the time to know someone is basically learning to like them."

It's silent as Beomgyu finally picks a movie, the familiar soundtrack giving you the hint that it's West Side Story.

"Well, maybe you could learn to like me too." It was barely audible over the movie playing but you still heard it, the quiet mumble from Beomgyu, concealed with a slight pout.

Your mouth parts a little snapping your attention from your phone to the brunette next to you, "Huh?"

"Huh?" he returns your gaze with wide eyes, fauxing innocence.

"Beomgyu, you just said something. Say it again." You sit up straight, your posture a little more fixed.

"I didn't say anything, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Beomgyu!" you yell flailing your arms around, with your brows furrowed, and that makes him jump a little, flinching. "Repeat what you said!"

"No!"

You pull out the pillow behind you and threaten to hit him by raising it over his head which gets him talking. "Okay! Okay, hold on!"

"First, put that down!" he yells dramatically referring to the pillow—arm shielding his face.

You reluctantly oblige, slowly lowering your pillow.

When both of your breathing starts to steady, Beomgyu speaks up. "This is not how I planned on telling you—"

"Just say it Beomgyu."

"Okay, look—" he takes a deep breath in, "Imagine there's a totally different dimension. You've known this friend for five years or so—"

"So... you."

"Not me! Just, just imagine someone else." you roll your eyes, trying your hardest to keep your urge to smile down, you've watched enough romcoms to know where this was going.

He continues. "And that friend tells you that 'haha, I'm totally in love with you'. How would you respond? Like, rhetorically."

You sigh, deciding to go along with him. "Rhetorically..." his ears perk up, you could either crush his dreams or—

"...I would reject that friend."

"Oh..oh! Oh yeah, totally. That makes sense—"

"Because they're someone else, not you."

It falls quiet as Beomgyu blinks a few times, processing what you just told him. "What?"

You give him a smile before turning to the TV screen, "I like you too."

He also turns to face the TV, lips parted ever so slightly before he just breaks into a smile, biting down on his bottom lip, trying to contain his squeals.

It was so intune with your friendship for both of you to just sit there after confessing your love for the other, watching the movie you've both watched a hundred times before, in silence as the clock almost struck midnight.

It wasn't anything dramatic, just two people silently enjoying the tragic love story between Maria and Tony while snacking.

Beomgyu thinks you don't notice, but your eyes still catch how his fingers slowly 'walked' to yours, nearing them inch by inch and finally holding them. You laugh a little at how how silly it was, and he does too in reaction—contrasting to the scene currently playing, the death of multiple beloved characters finally occuring.

Your eyes lazily look over at your clock, then you smile looking at the boy next to you. "What's your wish? It's almost your birthday," you manage to say, fighting through your sleep.

Beomgyu is also clearly on the same wavelength as his voice is hoarse, barely hearable, "My wish..."

"Kissing you?"

Your smile grows bigger— god, he was so cheesy. "Come here you big baby."

"That's so unsexy... don't call me big baby when I'm about to give you the best french of your life..."

You laugh, hitting his chest lightly. "Okay, okay I promise I won't."

When he nears your face, the movie in the background playing lines you both could recite by heart, he cups your cheeks, breathing a little unsteady, before smiling. "What?" you whisper.

"I don't think this is a dream."

You look into his eyes for second before deciding to go in first, catching his lips with yours. It's like a small peck, soft and slow as your hand find themselves tangled in his hair. You pull away for a second, looking at his lips then his face, "Yeah, I don't think it is either."

ending a/n: you finished!! i didn't do the usual and ask you to reblog in the beginning, but i'll do it here hehe, reblogging [the little sign by the heart button] helps push this fic!

it's like the main thing that helps me out and its what tumblr's algorithm picks up on!! that said, i'd love to hear your thoughts on this, i love writing best friend!gyu ><

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Who do you think are the ten core characters of the series? Is there a difference for you between importance to narrative/narrative roles and regularity in appearance for you?

Yeah, appearance count and narrative role aren't the same thing. Like, a character can be super plot-relevant or relevant to the themes but not have much on-page time.

And it's a damn hard question. Like, HP has so many characters, but a lot of them are like, random NPCs, so let's see if I can do this without bias for my favorites (since the bias is here). The order isn't necessarily in the right order, but it's the order in which they came to my mind.

The first 3 core characters for the plot/narrative are obvious:

1. Harry Potter

2. Voldemort

3. Dumbledore

I think Harry is an obvious choice as the main character and narrator. I don't think he needs further explanation.

Dumbledore and Voldemort are examples of characters who technically don't have as much on-page time but are so incredibly integral to the narrative. I mean, in book 7, Voldemort is barely there, and Dumbledore is dead, but both of them are still at the helm of the narrative.

So, yeah, these gotta be the top 3.

The next 3, I think, are:

4. Ron Weasley

5. Hermione Granger

6. Severus Snape

Like, Ron and Hermione are Harry's best friends. They are super integral to the plot and narrative of the books and appear more than any other character besides Harry. Ron represents the wizarding world, he is the main member of Harry's surrogate family (the Weasleys) so he's so incredibly integral. Hermione is the brilliant muggleborn, she is eleven both for her active part in the story and also for what she is in this world with the blood status tensions.

Snape, while not appearing as much, is instrumental to the narrative as a whole and to how the plot goes down. Snape, as the double-triple agent that he is, is also pretty representative of the story's themes of love and sacrifice, which supports his narrative importance.

Then, the final 4 to reach 10 are a bit of a struggle for me, and I feel my biases rearing their head, but I'd go:

7. Sirius Black

Sirius is the first real parental figure who's competent and whom Harry truly trusts. Sirius' existence is both important to the themes (the black sheep of the Black family) and more so to Harry's personal arc. His death and Harry's grief over it are so prevalent in Harry's story far into Deathly Hallows. Also, he's relevant to the Secret Keeper plot and James' and Lily's deaths.

8. Reberus Hagrid

Hagrid is the person who introduces so many of the ideas we know of as part of the Wizarding World. He's Harry's (and ours) first guide to the magical world and remains instrumental in getting Harry and Co useful information throughout the books.

9. Peter Pettigrew

I mean, none of us would be here without this rat. He got James and Lily killed, he resurrected Voldemort, and he then accidentally saved Harry at Malfoy Manor. He's surprisingly important.

Number 10 was the hardest, and I considered a few characters, but I decided to go with:

10. Lily Potter

Lily has little to no page time. We don't know about her as much as we know about James, but I think she's more integral to Harry's story. She represents love strong enough to rebound a killing curse. She saved Harry, and her sacrifice protects him quite literally throughout the books. It's why he defeats Quirrell in book 1, it caused Voldemort to keep him alive long enough to escape in book 4, and it's potentially why he came back after dying. Lily and her death are big themes in the books for what it represents and what she represents more than just her as a character.

Both Lily and James haunt Harry's narrative, but I feel Lily does so a bit more. There's a reason "you have your mother's eyes" is emphasized so much. Harry at his core, is more similar to Lily than James. That and the love Lily represents are core aspects of the story.

So, these are my picks, I tried to be as objective as I could, 🤷🏻‍♀️

[vioranhyperfixation]

How Tim discover Jason is alive In this au

Rafi, trying to bond with tim. But doesn't understand Tim mind so they decided to just have Tim play a new character in Rafi story.

Tim : her name is valarine, she is a vampire who doesn't want to drink blood but is forced to because of her nature.

Rafi : *rising his voice* oh my god, we encounters another narsistic vampire atla!

Tim : what?

Rafi : ah?

Tim : we're starting now?

Rafi : yeah?

Tim : I just starts describing my character!

Rafi : well we don't do that. The story discover things by their own experiences! So what she did just now is narrating herself, which is a very narsistic thing to do.

Tim : damn it.

Rafi : anyway, *raising his voice* do you think she is related to valamioracartelavonse?

Tim : heh, vala? I would know somebody with the same name as me!

Rafi : *voice raised* no! Valamioracartelavonse! It's all one word! Her name is valamioracartelavonse not vala. I might call her with curses and all but I won't just assigned her a random name couse she has a long name, that's uneducated.

Tim : what else do you call her then?

Rafi : that bitch who's supposed to die long ago but haven't died yet.

Tim : shorter one?

Rafi : oh, villian wannabe.

Tim : like the one from the crime alley kind or government kind?

Rafi : dunno, American guy the one who nickname her that.

Tim : American guy, yees, American guy. Isn't it the time you tell us who he is, like, we are trying to bond here, so I want to know about you as you're about me. Although it's fine if you want to take your time.

Rafi : ah yes, uhhh. Jason! Yes I think his name is Jason! Jason todd is the name you should probably be familiar with, I think that's the name.

Tim : haha, good joke.

Rafi : what? No, it wasn't a joke, that's American guy name. I would know.

Tim : he died years ago.

Rafi : and he got revived somewhat long ago.

Tim : he died by the hands of joker! And his dead isn't a joke!

Rafi : well I know! And he get back to gotham a few years ago!

Tim : that joke is terrible! Don't go around bringing dead siblings to people!

Rafi : well he ain't dying the last time I see him you Bullhead!

Rafi : here!

Tim :

Rafi :

Tim :

Rafi : ...

Rafi : do you.. Not know?

Tim :

Rafi : god I need to say sorry to American guy. God he's gonna nag my ear off. Give me my phone back!

Tim : the fuck. You have his number!?

Rafi : of course I have his number! Why would i not? I mention him multiple time since my first arrival!

Tim : I don't know that's my supposed dead brother at that time!

Rafi : well I thought you know that I know you know that I know and we just don't talk about that!

Tim : then explain it to me!

Rafi : well first of all, he alive now!

Rafi : second of all, it ironic how he call valamioracartelavonse the one who supposed to be dead long ago but haven't yet here there is.

Tim :

Rafi : I'm coming back tomorrow once you are done with your breakdown, good luck🤞

[paradoxcase]

Chapter 27 of Nona the Ninth

Looks like the Nook app had a character encoding issue, haha. Going into the ebook file, it looks like it was supposed to be Takṣa, which seems to be the name of a person who's important to Hinduism in some way. I'm guessing the rest of those names that I don't recognize are probably also random Earth references

That's pretty interesting, and makes a lot of sense, and follows on from Pash talking about being in BOE from a young age. And I guess maybe also explains why We Suffer tolerates Pash and gives her important assignments in spite of the fact that they seem to clash a bit, personality-wise

Man, so many people have come back that I hope G1deon does come back at some point, both for Pyrrha's sake, and also, I'd like to actually learn what kind of person he was. I know that G-- there is probably just her saying [g], but it makes me think of the way he is referred to in the John sections, like she is saying his original name? But even if she knows what that is, I don't think there's any reason for Nona to not hear it here

Manifesting cosmic spider Alecto

She just, like - she's not having a tantrum or anything right now, she just sticks a sword into her leg because it's inconvenient to carry it and she's only worried about damaging her shirt

Also, I don't think it is ever clarified in this chapter what she actually needs the sword for? Was she planning on fighting the Heralds?

I'm not sure exactly when she had this communication? She doesn't talk about it at all, the only time she really mentions Number Seven is when she said good night to it that one time, and she doesn't mention ever having had like, a conversation with it. I also don't think she knows it's possessing Judith at this point or she would probably have addressed Judith in the truck, I would guess. Number Seven also claims that she asked it for help, but I can't find anywhere in the story where she did that or mentions having done that

This has to refer to John, right? I don't think there are any other relevant male characters left in this story, except Palamedes, who is definitely not who's being referred to here. But John hasn't been present at all in any of the Nona-narrated sections of this story and is probably on the other side of the galaxy right now, so I'm not sure how he could be fleeing from Number Seven here

Again, I'm not sure when this happened, unless it's referring to something that happened 10,000 years ago? Or how a planet can somehow give "blood for blood", or what exactly it was supposed to help with, or how

Yeah, I think she knows what it means. She's standing up here begging Number Seven to not eat the planet and not kill all the people she cares about, so yeah, I think she does

So this was what Judith was talking about earlier:

And:

Alecto is a "green thing" I guess because Earth has plantlife? But if you see it from space, it looks more blue than green. I guess she is green-and-breathing because she has a physical body? I'm not sure who Number Seven saw in the waves, here. The people fighting it were G1deon, Mercy, Augustine, Ianthe, and briefly Nonius and co. Is it talking about how it noticed Ianthe arriving in the shuttle via the River and remembered that she was one of the people who had fought it earlier?

Here on truck, I'm not sure if Number Seven is talking about Nona expending Harrow's body or something else when it says "you eat yourself". And so far, we are to understand that the resurrection beasts do eat living planets and aren't interested in the dead ones, so I'm not sure what it means by "unliving marrow", either

I mean it did work on one resurrection beast

I don't know what the significance of this is

More references to whatever this tower is. Is this some new thing that John made to fight resurrection beasts now that he's down to just one Lyctor?

Maybe Judith is going to be ok, but she's not up to date on recent events, haha

[jazzically]

GUESS WHAT I FINALLY STARTED!!!!!!!!! thats right i got thru all the post-tma-s5 and pre-tmagp-s1 bonus content and we are now on tHEEE MAGNUS PROTOCOL!!!!!!! oh my god i am absolutely LOVING it so far. dude . i was worried i wasnt going to like it because of a random reddit post i saw on google (silly i know reddit's full of party poopers) and also because i thought jonny wasnt going to be involved with the writing at all (for some reason) but OMG!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S SO GOOD!!!!!!!! bouncing in my seat this is SUCH an EPIC premise

during magp 1 i thought to myself "i hope they have a canon reason for microphones everywhere listening and also for the computer voices becoming human and also for the talented writing of the cases" and then 3 seconds later i thought "how very silly of me, of course they do"

SO YEA FEELING GOOD!!!!!! vvvv excited to see where this is going. when i first saw the name "the magnus protocol" on spotify i got CHILLS i was like oh my god i bet it's fantastic (granted i was on like season 2 of tma at the time so . i had a ways to go . but still) AND IT IS

i am finding it slightly harder to discern between voices and make out what they're saying but its only ep 2 with a whole new cast so we'll see

OH YEAH I FORGOT ANOTHER THING!!!!: i cant BELIEVE i didnt recognize jonnys voice as castor or whatever its name is at first. he is such an incredible voice actor like what . the flip. bro he and alex actually sound like robots like genuinely

now who is augustus.....????!!!! hmmm...and what decides which narrator is going to speak? how do they speak with the cadences and intonations of the mind of whoever originally wrote the words? and why are some of the episodes dedicated to people that share last names with the characters ??? also gwendolyn BOUCHARD?? SCUSE ME?? ooooooohhhhhhpgggggh im so exciTEDD but i hav ehomework to do. sob sob. catch yall later. OH OK LAsT LAST THING i loooove the main theme !!!!! that one person on reddit (i dont have reddit i just google things sometimes) was right, the theme does sound like the og magnus theme but upside down. i LOVE the subtle musical callbacks and motifs og h my god.

also i dont totally understand the case file naming system yet but we'll get there.

ugh this is SO COOL

lmao i love how it was like "you thought the mouthful of numbers for mag statements was bad? well here's a long string of even worse gibberish for you to learn !!!!" (i am overjoyed)

(update i think augustus sounds like mr leitner 🤨 ms. sims may yet have her moment to shine in the magnusverse..... jonny if she doesnt get to cackle then shame on u /j)

[strixcattus]

Stuff about the narrator, stuff about the narrator...

There's this moment with Snowdrake's mum in the true lab "you laugh and keep laughing, it's so funny you can't stop, tears run down your face", so it seems that laughing off or laughing at bad things might be a habit, especially since apart from the puns, other topics for jokes include

Cain's deathbed ("If you laid down here, you might never get up")

A child who "slept in the soil" (though the other "dirty jokes" you can get here are two children playing in a muddy flower garden and a child who ate pie with their hands...so those were nicer, at least)

Frisk's imminent death, multiple times (like a wry joke about each bomb with Mettaton or checking the forcefields)

"Smells like nightshade and bleach" (when fighting whimsalot, is that a joke even?)

"If you're cuter, monsters won't hit you as hard" (explains why accessories raise defence but it's terrible phrasing. In the demo it was just "monsters will be reluctant to hit you" much better)

Putting 5 punch cards in a box will result in Frisk making a smiley face with them, and then when you take one out and say "HaPPineSs Is fLEetinG" because they're a loser edgelord

Serious mode

In certain battles, the jokey item names will be removed and the flavour text will get silent. This happens only three times, when Tori stops attacking and starts saying she can't save even a single child, during the entire duration of the Asgore fight and during Asriel's breakdown (and of course the rest of Asriel's fight is not in serious mode, when they're calling out the attack names, the tone there is excited and childish and playful)

Oh, and Asriel's phonecall, when the narrator says "it's a voice you have never heard before", the line comes out slow, double spaced like the narrator's shocked to hear him. Due to fun value events, you can get a random call from Alphys before you meet her but that doesn't prompt the same reaction, so maybe it's not an "unfamiliar" voice that does it?

When fighting Asgore, after like the third time trying to talk, the narrator will say "seems like talking won't do any more good" every time, except for the 9th time where the line is "seems all you can do is FIGHT", it changes back on the 10th time.

"statistics determine everything about you. Everything you are is but a slave to these tiny numbers." From the demo handbook, numbers, statistics, get everything to the highest it can go, yeah...

Remember me talking about the humans save files, yeah? Well, the first one, the empty one, it jumps into action during Frisk's run and while it still never resets, the file autosaves at certain points.

Seeing as the narrator isn't omniscient, some things they know start to stick out, like knowing where Cain died or "It's a family photo. Everyone is smiling." We saw what looked like a photo with them, didn't we? everyone else was smiling but Cain had their face covered in flowers...

In hard mode, Tori actually makes snail pie and Frisk makes a face but narry still thinks it smells wonderful, this is just funny because the narrator describes snail pie as an acquired taste (as in something you grow to like through eating it over and over) and Tori sure makes a lot of them

The narrator really does like Undyne calling her "the heroine who never gives up" and being generally rather gushy and complimentary (To the point where it almost comes across as mean to Frisk, unlike MK, they know full well that Frisk is Undyne's target, know Frisk can hear them and still gush about Undyne constantly, harsh). It's almost like Undyne is their favourite monster or their idol in the same way Papyrus's is Asriel, in life, Asriel didn't want to kill anyone even as they struck at him, and Papyrus never kills Frisk (he's the only one who fights and doesn't kill, even Tori can if you're not careful).

And well... Undyne is more like...Cain? The one willing, even happy, to kill six humans for the sake of monsterkind's freedom. Running a child through with a spear, poisoning oneself with a plant that makes you vomit blood, not for the faint of heart but someone has to make hard choices, right?

Sometimes the Narrator can be pretty bitter and angry, acting as if the pacifist route will amount to nothing worthwhile, "you gave the cheapest gift of all... friendship", they say Frisk's offers of friendship are cheap and worthless lip service, "try as you might, you continue to be yourself" they initially think Frisk staying themselves is a bad thing. They once open a book to the exact page that shows humans in the worst light possible, "here's a random page" when it's normally "you open to the middle" "fearful of further attacks, we retreated", they don't like Frisk, (someone made a graph of the way Narrator treats Frisk over time, they fling a lot of insults in the ruins). They don't like Frisk, they don't like humans in general, that's why they like Undyne!

The coffin was empty, right? So where are they buried?... Well it is a custom to put the remains of a monster on/near their favourite thing so their essence can live on there, and Tori deliberately planted a patch of Cain's favourite flowers (she has seeds in a drawer, remember?) in the ruins where we first fall? Are they buried there? Did poor Frisk fall on the misanthropic child's grave, Frisk sure has enough determination to revive a ghost, don't they? And the right colour soul?

And of course, saving the lost souls seems to take knowing them personally? Sharing good memories? But Frisk doesn't know Asriel and has no good memories to speak of, so how is he saved? ...Well, we do see someone's memories every time we die or fall unconscious right? Maybe they can help?

It's the first human isn't it

I've just gotten back to the story of the first human in my current run and I feel like it makes more sense that Asriel ended up in a flower given that he died in the garden and his dust was scattered there. So if the human was buried under the flowers we fall onto at the start of the game...

Why the hatred of humans, though, then? Just because of what happened to Asriel?

[jujutsustraycats]

Ahem.

*Soleil looks at her notebook* I am reporter Soleil, and as you know I like to ask questions. May I know how you and Tabito Karasu met? How did the spark of romance arise? What is your story?

Being an IshAsu fan, I would like to know how all this came about, and we are on national television.

📸📸📸📸🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤📽

*Ish sits awkwardly in the chair in front of Soleil, waving a little at the camera before turning to her*

I will say that the full story has already been narrated to Nami, which I will tag to this, but I also do not mind narrating it again, Miss Soleil.

Warning. It gets long.

*coughs*

It all started back midway through first year of high school (10th grade, in other words). The Osaka Prefecture School Fest season, specifically. Because our school had both junior high and senior high sections, we were hosting it at the time bear with me, I'm 18 years old to match his age in the storyline.

So we met around the third day, when I had a debate. He mistook me for his teammate from behind, this Indian guy the same height as me. He just sorta realized I had dysphoria from the start, though, cause he said I definitely look and act like a guy 🥹

Anyway, I decided to help him. We searched for his teammate all around the school, talking in between about random stuff. We clicked pretty fast. When we found his teammate, he reassured me about the debate and told me he'd be there.

After the debate, I ended up spraining my ankle, and he just took me to the infirmary. Stuck with me the entire time. I had to ask him when his game was for him to immediately panic and run to his match. After the day ended, though, he came up to me and asked if I'd be there for the remaining days. I said yeah.

I went for versification the next day, then walked around with him till he had a match. The next days were also like that, we got a little closer, and then he made a bet that if his team won against mine (our teams reached the finals), I'd have to do a favor for him, and the opposite if we won.

His team won.

The favor? He gave me a slip of paper with his phone number and the favor being to call him, cause I was too awkward to text someone.

We started off as friends who got close in a short matter of time, we'd visit each other every now and then, video calling every other night, I somehow bypassed his mental walls within a few months, like he'd done past mine. He went through a tough time in the meantime, which I'd helped him with.

The spark of romance... hm, that's tough, because I have a hard time processing romance. It felt as if his soul and mine were on the same plane, and had somehow grazed by and left a mark. The moment it happened... would be a year later on this one time my mum let him show me around downtown Osaka at nighttime she loved him when he first came over. I just sorta realized I didn't want him to slip through my fingers that night.

He confessed first, though. Called me on a random Sunday, two weeks after, if he could use one of my poems to confess to this guy he really liked. Had a heavy heart, but I agreed. And... that was the first time he texted me, my poem and his confession.

Now, though, texting is a normal occurence, but I still have not cleared my chat once.

[gwenyn28]

Scriptwriting 101

Since there are a few people who really seem to think that a tv show is “just” a tv show I had the urge to explain a few things, especially concerning the writing process and what is seen on the screen.

I am not a screen-/scriptwriter myself but it is quite easy to dig into the world of writing and find the important points when it comes to tv shows and/or media in general.

Therefore, I decided to sum this all up in one post you can pull up whenever somebody tells you that “the curtain is just blue because it’s blue”.

First of all, the writers are writing for the screen. If you write a line about an internal monologue or thought you have to think about what it would look like on screen. Why? Well, that’s quite simple. Because the viewer isn’t able to look into the character’s head to see his thoughts. Therefore, you have to show it. To visualize it, using different narrative devices to do so.

If a character thinks “I don’t like him” but doesn’t want anybody to know, how would you portray this on screen? Maybe with a disgusted face. Maybe with a disgruntled noise. Maybe with a quip. You have to show the viewers this thought. this dislike. Otherwise, you won’t be able to get the message across.

Therefore, one of the most important rules for screenwriting is “Show, don’t tell”.

Usually, you don’t have a narrator who explains everything a character does. Ideally, the audience should be able to pick up on the context from the dialog and action.

For example: It’s not needed to be said that a character grew up as a person. It can be shown in a montage of his past. Or with a well-placed sentence to show this growth.

By experiencing a show, the only kind of information the audience absorbs is what can be seen and heard on screen. And that’s it.

Now people could say “yeah, isn’t this about the curtain then? If it is shown blue, then it is blue, right?”

Well, no. Yes, the curtain is blue. And that is what the audience can see. But the bigger point is to question WHY is the curtain blue. Okay, not everything is really that thought through, at least not the color of a random curtain. But other things might have a deeper meaning and subtext because the writers could not convey their idea/story otherwise.

They have to show some things so that the audience can figure it out what they wanted to tell with what they have shown.

Be it with words that are said or actions like giving a certain character a scene where they act like another character to show how similar they are.

And there comes the next big point. The “Show, don’t tell” rule is very often in correlation with the limited time the writers have for their story/episode. Usually, on tv you have a limited number of minutes for each and every episode. So, every second counts.

If you decide to write a certain part and to keep it in the episode, it has to be important. To show something without explicitly telling it.

So, some scenes might seem random and not important. But believe me, they usually are. Why would you keep something that blocks a time slot in your episode if it was not important for the plot, character growth or characterization in general?

Imagine. You want to write an episode of a show. And you have a general idea about the topic for this episode. You start to line it out, work around it, put life into it. And in the end, you notice that you have written a lot more than what would fit into the episode. What would you cut off? Right. Stuff that does not help the general storyline or the characters.

For example: You have written about a beautiful sunset. The birds are chirping, there’s a slight breeze. You can see a car passing by a park. What would you do? Keep it or cut it off?

Keep it if it is needed to show one of your characters walking around that park to pan in on him with the camera to set the tone for the next scene.

Cut if off if it is just a filler and in no relation with any story or character.

Many scenes are therefore intentional to show with actions or dialog what the writer wanted to convey in that scene. A tv show hasn’t the advantage like a book where every thought, every emotion can be described in detail. It is limited and has to use other methods to keep a storyline up and working.

Coming back to the aforementioned narrative devices. These are writing techniques used in writing in general, not only in media. They are important everywhere.

But let’s look at them from a tv show perspective. I have already explained why it is important to show stuff, mostly using dialog and visuals, so that the audience gets it and the possible subtext/context. Let’s look at how a writer would do it.

Foreshadowing:

This is a way to provide hints on what will happen in a later episode. You could show for example that somebody waits for a call, not being able to reach another person just to find out that said person wasn’t available due to an accident that will be shown at the end of an episode. The audience will then realize “Wow, that makes sense. Because the person couldn’t be reached before.”

Language:

It is always important what kind of language you use. Which words are said and which aren’t, mostly in combination what kind of tone they use. Calling somebody by their dead name and/or mispronouncing them get the point across that this person is a transphobe, for example. There’s no need to tell the viewer that this person is an asshole anymore because the audience already knows. So, the words that are used and how they are used is a vital point for the “show, don’t tell” because it can give a clue about the character or the situation they are in.

Plot devices:

It’s a technique used to move the plot forward. Plot devices can be objects or characters to show a certain character trait or support a storyline. For example, if you have a show and all of a sudden somebody from the past appears, a long-lost sibling maybe, it could be to show the difficult family situation. That sibling might be not important in the long run and could be gone a few episodes later. But it started another storyline and gave some insight to one of the main characters. Or the audience finds out that one of the characters has a relative with mental health issues who just appears in one episode which could be just to explain why a main character acted the way they did when faced with mental health issues in their current situation.

These are just a few storytelling tools that are often used in writing. And they all circle back to the “show, don’t tell” rule. Because if you look at each one of them and the examples I gave? Imagine how the situations would be without showing what I just described.

Would there be the “gasp” moment when you find out about the car accident without these little scenes before or would it be just “oh, car accident, whatever”?

Would it be believable if you have somebody call out another person as a transphobe without words used to show that the person really is?

Would it be understandable to start a new storyline without the long-lost sibling who started it?

No, usually, it wouldn’t.

Now, people could ask again about the “show, don’t tell”. Because why use these narrative devices when the rule is just to show stuff? Easy as that. Because otherwise a story would be boring.

It’s quite essential for a writer to put some tension into a story, to create a plot that hooks the audience (these are narrative devices as well, by the way). So, yeah. Show stuff. But make it exciting. Otherwise, nobody would tune in for the next episode.

This leads me to the next and probably last point.

Tuning in again. You might tune in again because a story is exciting. Yes. That’s one reason. Another one is or at least could be that the audience can relate to the characters. Writers usually give characters certain traits or flaws that the audience would get the feeling that this could be them. And that these characters might be fictional but still human somehow.

Characters don’t need to be perfect. They need to be relatable.

Connecting this with the main rule means that a character and his actions are just shown to give the audience a better feeling for them and who they are. So that they can relate. It’s usually important because if something happens off screen, the understanding might not be there. The audience needs to see things to understand what and why it happened. For example, a break-up offscreen always leaves the question about how and why they really broke up and that could dampen further scenes.

So, in conclusion. If something isn’t on screen it leaves the audience without something to relate to. Some might say that it probably wasn’t something important then and yes, I would agree. But there is also the possibility that something is left off screen on purpose to make the audience wary of a situation of a character because they haven’t seen things with their own eyes.

To sum this all up then:

A tv show doesn’t do stuff just because they can. The writing is intentional because they have limited means to convey their story to keep it exciting and relatable. Otherwise, the audience wouldn’t continue to watch. So, maybe the next time you talk to somebody about a show, think about the possibility that there has been some subtext to it. And not just that the curtain is blue.

[candyskiez]

I see you have OCs 👀 so uhhh

Jasper and Lilac (<- uhhh their name I think sorry this is in a rush)

Can I have some details about them, like their story and who they are?

HEHEJEJEJ. OH RAINBOW. MY DEAREST MUTUAL... YOU HAVE MADE A HORRIBLE HORROBLE MISTAKE.

Jasper and Lilac are both grimwalkers! Toh OCS that got uh. A little out of control. Whoops. Jasper is Darius' mentor, a blank slate that I have far too much fun taking advantage of, and Lilac is the grimwalker before him!

Let's start with Jasper. Jasper is...complicated. A thing I wanted to do was explore how growing up in an environment like the coven would realistically shape a person. And also projecting a bit. Jasper has been shown from a very young age that honesty is dangerous. If you tell people the truth, they get angry at you for it. Ergo, don't tell the truth. He's gotten used to lying or omitting the truth and thinks it's bad, but a part of life. It's not even a conscious decision for him for a lot of the time. Like he chooses on missions and all, but so much of it is also just...reflex. Gives a fake age without even thinking about it. A fake name is easy to come up with. He has plenty spare. Cover stories rehearsed. And it's the little things too. He reflexively leaves things out, not even thinking about it. He doesn't think about telling Darius his scar is from a battle, it's natural, it's not a conscious decision or something he stresses over. He just does it. He doesn't think about telling Darius yes, he's practiced all magic, he just does it. He doesn't think about telling Darius that he's the best at what he does, he just does. A lot of the time, the lie isn't even conscious or like debated over. He just lies. Honesty is harder for him because he's been lying for so long. It's his reflex to lie when asked a question. You ask his age, he's giving you a random number. You ask where he's from, he picks a random town name. It's an ill kept secret that The Golden Guard never tells the truth. Everyone knows, they just don't point it out to be polite.

Honesty is, once again, far more difficult. He feels like he's forcing it out of himself. Trying to express how he feels is hard and he always feels like he's acting, even if he genuinely is feeling that way, because he has to drag it out of himself. He has to laugh in a forced, more pretty sounding way as not to be weird. He can't express he's happy or grateful weirdly, so it has to be stilted and rehearsed. He feels like if he needs help he has to PROVE he needs help, so he exaggerates his sadness to make the point. It's not that he isn't that distressed, but it all feels like he's acting. He doesn't know how to be authentic. He doesn't know how to act how he means. He's always acting, always performing. He never stops.

He's a very good actor. He can cry on cue, he can look perfectly convincing, he can pull off whatever he'd like. But he doesn't know who he is behind all that. He doesn't know how to stop lying. He's lied for so long. To everyone. To his uncle, to his friends, to himself.

He is viciously protective. He sees Darius as his son. Darius...well. He knows (unreliable narrator) that Darius doesn't see him that way, but he'll care for him nonetheless. Jasper is very mischievous, very sassy, and he and Darius banter with each other a lot. Some dialogue that illustrated both Jaspers personality and their dynamic from a thing I'm writing:

"Hey, Slimeball!"

"What the fuck, Jasper?!"

Jasper threw his head back and laughed, a sharp sound. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, your face! I can't not!"

"You just tackled me out of the fucking sky, and you laugh?"

"Language!" He chided, like he's some boy scout and didn't just tackle him out of absolutely nowhere. "And it wasn't from the sky, you just didn't see me." He let go, offering a hand to help him up. Darius scoffs and takes it, brushing dirt off his back.

"Oh yeah, that's way better. What the hell was that for? Don't look at me like that, hell isn't a swear."

"Yes it is."

"No it's not."

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a debate." His mentor pinched the bridge of his nose. "That, my dear pupil-" He does an overdramatic bowing motion for emphasis, because he's Jasper. "Is a lesson in the importance of perception!"

"I understand all those words when you're not being a pretentious little bitch about it." He quipped, wiping grass off his arms. If he has to wash this uniform again, he might lose it. Who's idea was it to make uniforms that make any stains this obvious? Feels impractical.

"You do realize you can make a sentence without swearing, right? Do you know that's a thing you can do?"

"Fuck."

Jasper inhales, clearly resisting the urge to lecture. "Not getting sidetracked. Point is, you need to learn to be aware of your surroundings."

"And that means anticipating rude little assholes jumping me out of nowhere and ruining my day?"

"Exactly!" He shot him some finger guns, because that is a thing he did for some reason. "Also, swear jar. You've gotta expect the unexpected, sparky! Coven things."

"There's gotta be a better way to teach me than to jump me out of nowhere!"

"There isn't, actually. What better way to train your observation skills than to make you use them?"

"This feels extreme."

He just flashes him that stupid fuckin grin. "You'll get used to it. Trust me, you'll thank me for it later."

He rolls his eyes and shoves him lightly, like he always does. "Yeah. Sure I will, Jispo."

Jasper is...well, a lot of things. I'm gonna use the format of that one thing. He's a sweet heart. He's extremely manipulative. He's a backstabber. He's dangerously loyal. He's incredibly intelligent. He makes the stupidest decisions possible in the most logical way he can. He fears God. He views himself as a tool. He has so many wants and so many feelings and thinks he deserves none of them. A thing he has is he thinks that anyone who loves him only loves the version of himself he presents. He thinks the only one who loves the real him is Belos, and Belos treats him accordingly. He's a good dad. He's incredibly toxic. He's so many things at once and it's very hard to explain him. He's messed up and he loves his family and friends so so much. A very important thing about him is that he refuses to break a promise. That is one thing he will never do. He never makes a promise he can't keep. He will make his promises very specific in a way he will be able to keep them. He will bend himself inside out to keep a promise while doing whatever it is he's doing. He's charismatic and he's also such a fucking loser. I love him so much.

He has scales bc grimmie and is constantly taking them off to "look normal". When questioned he says they make people uncomfortable, and he's a coven head so he can't afford to be unsightly. He's...not great with self love. He views himself as someone who became irredeemable so his uncle wouldn't have to. Y'know that one post that's "I would kill for you. Please let me kill for you. I don't know how to express my love for you without destroying everything that hurts you. I've hurt you. I'm going to destroy myself." That's Jasper. That is very much Jasper. He doesn't know who he is outside of what service he can give. His self destructiveness a lot of the time isn't conscious. It's him not thinking about it. He doesn't think that he's denying himself resources when he feels like shit. To him, it's "eh, I'm too tired. I don't wanna." It's not conscious. He's silently destroying himself because he doesn't see a way out. He's aware one day he's going to fall apart if he doesn't die first. But there's no way out.

He's very protective, as I've mentioned. But sometimes that protectiveness causes him to do horrible horrible things. He's so intent on protecting the ones he loves that he strips them of their agency. He's not above manipulating them or lying to them if he thinks it'll protect them. I'm working on a fic about him right now so I might can it here? I've daydreamed about yoinking him out of toh and making a full blown story with him hahaha. I love him so much.

I also love Lilac but I am sleepy so I'm gonna can it here and I will reblog this post with more later! Remind me. Do not let me forget.

[hoperays-song]

Sing 1 Commentary and Review Pt. 1

Like I said yesterday, I will be giving commentary through out the run of the movie here! Is this an elaborate plan to distract me from my fic being with my beta reader? Yes! Am I using it for content? Also yes! I will try to remember to include timestamps and screenshots. But probably will just end up doing screenshots most of the time, sorry. Welcome to the madness!

(There will be multiple parts because these take a while and also there's a limit of thirty photos per post so yeah. I got 9 minutes in? I talk a lot during movies ok? It's an AuDHD thing.)

----------------------------

I feel like now is as good of a time as any to mention that I despise minions (aka was forced to watch Despicable Me in art class way too much as a child). So yes, we're not even past the opening credits and I'm already complaining, welcome to watching a movie with me everyone.

Ok just noticed this for the first time, but Old Moon Theatre had lyres (a symbol of Apollo, the Greek god of music) and grape vines (a symbol of Dionysus, the Greek god of theatre) on it, which is just super cool!

I love the fact that Buster canonically talks to himself and narrates his own life. Like same bestie. Love this for you. You're in your delusion era rn but go for it mate.

Lesbians!!

(No I will not be taking criticism here. That pose is one of the gayest things I have ever seen and I just looked in a mirror.)

HE HAS APPEARED!!!!!

Ok three things. One, these cops appeared out of literally no where. Like we just did a circle around the boy and we did not see them. Can they teleport or something???

Also, two, what the hell is in that box? I'm typically not one to judge what random stuff you leave in an alley (yes, yes I am, but to be fair this is the cleanest alley I've ever seen), but is that just a box of cut up springs??

And for number three, you thought you heard someone singing??? You thought you heard someone singing and only spare one glance down the alley behind the bank during a spree of bank robberies??? Ok no, these cops are terrible. The bank being robbed is absolutely their fault, what the hell?!

Ooooo, eight ball keychain!!!

I mean... Johnny did warn them, ten seconds too late, but he did warn them. He's still absolutely grounded but you know, he tried. Also, I just realized they took the license plate off the truck for the robbery. Insanely smart. The best boys. I love them.

✨ 🎶He's a runner, he's a track star! 🎶✨

Also, apparently Johnny can catch up with a accelerating truck... ok then.

Glad to see this skill that I'm absolutely sure will be used again in the multiple other applicable scenarios. What was that? It never comes up again? Yeah, that seems about right.

Ok, how the hell have the not found these guys yet??? Like the rest of the gang are in disguises, horrible ones but still disguises, but Johnny wears the exact same clothes throughout the movie and is not hiding his face in the slightest. You're telling me no one, not a single person, recognized him???

Also, just how many vintage trucks are in this town? Like just look up the truck model and go down the list of all the one's owned in Calatonia. Boom, done. The police in this place suck at their jobs.

ROSITA!!!!

Ok, so the piglets are definitely around first grade judging by the alphabet and number chart on the wall. Also, a learning chart on the wall is so cute and sweet, I love it!

(Theory) So... we can all agree it's summer right? Because not only are Johnny and Meena home (ok Meena's home, Johnny's being a felon, but that's not important) at lunch time but so are the piglets. They for sure aren't in school yet. And yeah, I know they leave with backpacks later on but that could just be daycare (it's likely daycare). So, since a lot of daycares aren't open on weekends (or at least ones near me), Sing 1 starts in the summer on a weekend! That's cool!

Awwww Rosita. I'm so sorry honey. I love you, we all love you, and I wish I could say you have a normal, relaxing life after this movie but... I'm sorry. Not even close to one.

Ok wow, forgot how vertigo inducing this movie was. Wow.

Ash has arrived!!!!

Also, super interesting how Ash's guitar looks a lot more worn that Lance's. It has scratches and faded stickers while Lance's looks shiny and new here.

And Lance... ewww.

Fair man, fair.

And before people get on to my man Harry for kicking them out without pay by the looks of it, most restaurant gigs I know of are not paid, the musicians get tips and exposure, and I'm pretty sure there is not one single person in that restaurant soo... yeah. They weren't getting paid either way.

One of the best expressions all movie.

I'm gonna punt him. I don't care that he's been on screen for 10 seconds, I'm gonna punt him.

(Moments where Lance is puntable counter: 4)

And now we have everyone!!! Meena, welcome aboard!

Also that cake looks amazing. ...Hold up, I'm getting lunch.

Ok, I'm back! Let's dive back in to my lovely ramblings that are hopefully semi entertaining.

Oh boy, let's talk about the happy birthday scene. For one, Meena is a kid. Stop being mean to a kid.

For another, the rest of her family just stops singing??? Like excuse me, that's not how the happy birthday song works. I don't care if one of the singers is a grammy winner, you don't stop singing just to listen to them. It is a group effort. Either everyone sings or no one does. It's the birthday song rules people. They really put her on the spot here and I do not appreciate it, the poor baby.

So, Meena has tried out for choirs and bands before but it never worked out. That makes me think her social anxiety is not new and I am very much disappointed with her grandfather's perspective on it.

Oh great. He's here.

(Mike puntable moments counter: 1)

Their money must be different than ours since that is the design of a penny.

Also: (Mike puntable moments counter: 2)

OK. This is a straight up mugging. Why is no one doing anything?! Like excuse me?!?!?

Oh and now he gave the guy an asthma attack. Sod off Mike.

Why is everyone siding with the mouse man?????? He sucks??? Hello????

(Mike puntable moments counter: 5)

Ok, ignore the monkey man for a minute. The restaurant is legit named 'The Squids'. So do they own it? Do they work there? Was the founder a squid? What's the situation because I'm guessing the don't eat them since they are sentient.

For such a fancy restaurant, they have terrible taste in lighting decor. I'm pretty sure those are the same ones at my doctor's office.

Oh Eddie, my favourite trust fund baby of the series. It's so good to see you.

Ok, let's talk about the implications of what Eddie is saying here. He says that his dad has been paying for the shows. And Buster's theatre has been struggling for way more than one or two shows.

And I don't know about you guys but I personally wouldn't pay for my adult kid's friend's failing theatre more than once if it turned out to be a bust. It's a waste of money and have you seen today's economy. Now if that was my kid's partner? Different story. I would probably be more willing to pay for a few more for both of their sakes.

What am I saying here? Noodlemoon. They're dating. End of story. ----------------------------

I'll be right back with part 2!

(And 30 more screenshot taking up memory on my dying laptop.)

[mudstoneabyss]

can you make a list of your top indie horror game recs ::3

yeah! so these wont be in order of what i like the most, they're just going to be here in whatever order I think of them. i'm also trying to go with what I think are more lesser-known ones, and if one is more popular it'll because I think it's one people write off that are actually good. as i'm writing this i'm going back up to say the descriptions for these will become less detailed because i got tired and cant keep repeating the art!! the atmosphere!!

Scarlet Hollow: A heavily choice-based horror mystery visual novel about going back to Scarlet Hollow- a small town in south historically ran by your family- for the funeral of your late aunt. its episodic and there are currently only 4 of the 7 episodes out. even with just them it is my favorite game. I love the writing and the art and the whole atmosphere of the game AND the soundtrack brought Brandon Boone (the composer) into my top 5 artists in my spotify wrapped last year

Slay the Princess: Another choice-based horror visual novel (and dating sim!) by the creators of Scarlet Hollow where you are tasked with, well, slaying the princess to prevent the destruction of the entire world. It's only a demo right now-releasing q3 of this year- but I'm excited for the whole game! my selling point for it with my followers is that the narrator (and some other characters) are voiced by Jonny Sims and hey podcast fans you like him check out this game

Endacopia: A click and point horror game inspired by Humongous Entertainment games such as Pajama Sam. Currently also a demo and set to release in October of 2024, I can not emphasize enough how excited I am for it. The game's style is so fun and there's lots of little details and the music??? There's two musical numbers in the demo alone. Some of the style and writing also reminds me of Undertale and even Homestuck somewhat (I say as someone who hasn't read homestuck)

FAITH: The Unholy Trinity: This is an 8-bit style horror game inspired by the 1980s Satanic Scare coming in 3 chapters with multiple endings, a very good example of games not needing high-end realistic graphics to be scary

Doki Doki Literature Club: Glances at my icon. who could've seen this one coming. I feel like most people know about ddlc by now, even if they don't know anything past "horror anime dating sim". It starts off for a long while a seemingly normal, if bland, visual novel dating sim until-seemingly suddenly- twisting into psychological horror. There's, however, a lot of foreshadowing once you see the beginning again after knowing what will happen. Honestly I think this games brilliant and its such a shame it somehow got lumped in with "cringe" mascot horror (its not even a mascot horror game?). For me a lot of the horror comes from the amount of scares left up to a random percentage- and how subtle a lot of them are. You can replay it and have a fairly different experience than you did the first time- and be scared by completely new things. There's also this existential and cosmic horror element that is less one you experience while playing it, i think, and more thinking about it afterwards. This isn't even touching on a lot of the secrets and easter eggs. a few years after the original game came out, Doki Doki Literature Club Plus was released, and it leaves the og game experience essentially untouched while adding a new vn experience the length of the og game (thats seemingly horror-less) as well as some more lore to the world, not of the game, but around the game, and builds more on the existential/cosmic horror. Needless to say from the length of this, I adore this game. also take the content warnings seriously, in the (free) og the game opens with warnings and a link to a page with specific tws, and in ddlc+ you are given the options to see those warnings listed before starting the game, as well as the ability to turn on tw pop-ups before game events

Home Safety Hotline: Also currently a demo, a horror game where you work for a home safety hotline, answering calls to help people deal with pests and other household problems. as the game progresses you get some more... off-putting calls and access to more unusual problems. I love games that put you into the role of someone who works a mundane job dealing with horrifying shit (similar reasoning to why I like the I'm On Observation Duty games, which I think are more popular rn than I want to put on this list)

NiGHT SIGNAL: By the same creator of Home Safety Hotline, this one's a short one about getting a new tv set and finding some strange channels during the night, inspired by The Twilight Zone and a 1995 game, The Dark Eye. A lot of the art in the game is done with clay which creates this really nice uncanny look and atmosphere- details about which you can see in an artbook you unlock after playing the game, which is REALLY cool I adore seeing the creativity behind and what goes into games like these.

and there's a bunch more I like, these are just the ones off the top of my head and I also dont feel like typing a bunch more dfnafnsk I'll also say if yall haves one you really like that I havent mentioned feel free to send an ask talking about them

[arwainian]

Reading This Week 2024 #47

my laptop is getting its fan repaired/is sitting in the computer repair shop waiting for a new fan to arrive so my workflow for this week has been decimated. ah well. at least there's books

a few housekeeping notes: I'm starting to try using Storygraph again, same username, just trying to populate it with the books I read this year. I try to stay committed to not giving books star rating if I can help it, because it detracts from my reading experience. working slowly at giving the books i've read written reviews (sometimes just taking the thoughts i put in these posts for it).

Finished:

Until I Love Myself, Vol. 2 by Poppy Pesuyama, translated by Emily Balistrieri (speaking of storygraph, my thoughts/review of this book were on there first) I think this manga. moreso this second volume but also in the first, is about the circumstances of its own creation. so many of its chapters include discussions between Pesuyama and their editor regarding what they want to include and how they want to handle its publication

LEASH. DEPATURE. COMPULSION. by rozecrest on ao3

Tiger, Tiger by Petra Erika Nordlund *caught up. not finished. tiger tiger is an ongoing web comic. i'm bad at keeping track of ongoing serialized work i'm reading on these posts, so i've been slowly reading through it for a while. you should check it out for amazing art, cool worldbuilding, and messy queer characters

The Wicked + The Divine, Vol. 7-9 written by Kieron Gillen, art by Jamie McKelvie (vol. 8 has a lot of guest artists and writers) okay now that i've finished this series i have some Thoughts. i think wicdiv is very very twisty in a way that was probably really fun when it was being released. however how i am reading the series, as a collection of trades that compile multiple issues together, it mostly reads as very cheap. the one exception to my negative opinions toward its twists and reveals is the revelation about the actual nature of the gods cycles and their powers, which felt earned in that it had genuine clues to its set up in the earlier issues, so there was no 'we hid key information from you ah ha arent you so surprised about how it actually went down' that rubbed me the wrong way about the rest of the twists.

Blue Box, Vol. 6 by Kouji Miura, translated by Christine Dashiell *wails* oh no the drama of an unrequited crush that's out in the open. the way that Taiki lashes out at Chono for continually talking about him as 'the guy she likes' when he doesn't feel the same for her and be reminded that she like-likes him makes him sad and uncomfortable about not requiting her feelings... these teenagers....

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End, Vol. 7-8 written by Kanehito Yamada, art by Tsukasa Abe, translated by Misa 'Japanese Ammo' aw yeah baby we're back on track. no more boring extending mage exam arc, we're back to the bread and butter of the series. short adventure vignettes

Dealing with Dragons by Patricia C. Wrede, audiobook narrated by the cast of the Words Take Wing Repertory Company i picked this up for my mini mutuals book club! we rolled a random number on our list and this is what came up. juvenile fantasy about a princess who runs away and is voluntarily 'held captive' by a dragon. i did picture her relationship with her dragon as a lesbian romance, and i am correct. i will not be taking questions at this time

The Girl That Can't Get a Girlfriend by Mieri Hiranshi autobio manga about the author's struggling love life

"Boot Hill and the Fear of Dice" by Rutskarn essay/blog post about the author's experience using a highly lethal cowboy combat ttrpg to run a high intrigue high politics, limited combat tragedy game. sounds like he has an awesome table of players and really made me think about all of the work i'd want to do if i ever wanted to run my own political intrigue game

last night in a darkened room by bigdamnher0 on ao3 read to feel sad about dick grayson and tim drake

Started/Ongoing:

Provenance by Ann Leckie, audiobook narrated by Adjoa Andoh yay stand alone book in the imperial radch universe! i love crime.

Magic's Price by Mercedes Lackey, audiobook narrated by Gregory St. John SPOILERS but: extremely frustrated about the self-conscious narrative defense about the problematic age gap relationship (no its fine that his love interest is less than half his age! he's his soulmate reincarnated!). listen. i was ready to meet you at your freak. i will read some Weird Shit and enjoy my time with it. i was in fact delighted by the romantic comedy farce that the bard had to go through to get the hot older wizard to notice him. the younger party being the active pursuer of the relationship took us as far out of uncomfortable power dynamics as it reasonably could, and i was ready to root for the happy couple. but the minute you start going 'no no no its NOT weird. its completely fine actually for this magical reason' you've lost me. are you trying to tell me that it's not freak shit? that its just okay and not weird and No One needs to feel weird about it? embrace your freak shit or die

[joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Jellyfish finished! Last episode here was like, decent. We got our moment of Kano nearly bombing again only to be brought back to confidence by the fans and also Mahiru, like sure that was good. Performance was solid but fuckin entirely full disclosure Girls Band Cry episode 11's performance rocked my world so much that this felt wayyyyy weaker just by virtue of having watched that just a couple days beforehand, so I didn't feel very impressed at all lol. Kano and Mahiru make up, it's quite a nice scene, ideally they would've then made out but I suppose that kiss from however long ago just happened for the hell of it. Couple loose ends wrap up, our characters are certainly in a better position, things are neat. The best scene of the episode and one of the strongest in the show comes in a mostly vertical video phone recording of the gang painting over the main Jellyfish mural that started the entire show, a very clear rebirth for the lot of them. I liked this bit a lot, like a lot a lot. Fresh start, the characters are all close enough friends to just vibe, per Mahiru's narration it's not even so much about the numbers anymore it's just they enjoy spending time together and want to keep doing so which is really nice, shit's just good.

As for Jellyfish as a whole, I mean like, I think you can probably make out the progression of my opinion just through all my posts so far. It's definitely good, like I clearly had enough fun to where my score here is positive. But for how much I was anticipating it and how special the first episode felt, over the course of its runtime I think it started losing me on a lot of things. There are lots of random side-tangents that don't amount to anything, conflicts that feel both rushed and not sufficiently resolved at the same time, I don't want to see the entire discussion of the show turn into "muh duh yuri bait" or whatever bullshit but also that kiss that never meaningfully amounting to anything further was odd, and just in general the show could've went further in a lot of ways, really. I was never really impressed past the first episode and a couple straggler scenes later on, instead it was just going through the motions. I could probably even make some drawn-out metaphor about the show itself drifting aimlessly like a jellyfish in the sea, like woah ain't that ironic, but yeah nah I hope I've communicated my feelings well enough. That can be all I think, end post.

[kenonade]

stella maris reading log #1

its about damn time i start noting down how i feel when i read what i read. hell yeah. hopefully this makes me a better writer.

spoilers not really about the plot (bc honestly is there even a plot in the sense of a plot) but more about the language below the cut woooooo

tldr: book cool. writing insane. wtf. wtf. wtf. head ouchie. 越级打怪的后果就是头晕脑转 (dizziness is the consequence of attempting to read beyond my level). ooga booga man talk abt english

reading stella maris is so interesting because im just sitting here wondering like. how the FUCK did mccarthy accumulate all this knowledge about a variety of very distinct fields. my brain hurts. this is so much information. im learning nothing and learning everything at the same time. how the man managed to learn all this stuff and how he managed to put it together like this puzzle me equally intensely. its one thing to acquire knowledge. its a whole other thing to convey it in language so dense with information but also character. like, not to be that guy, but when osc does his infodumps i think to myself okay old man lets get you to bed. every time alicia opens her mouth i confront my intellectual inferiority and contemplate the meaning of life because it is alicia talking.

not to mention what the FUCK alicia. if only you’d have KNOWN. EUGH. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT.

my head hurts. the reason why im writing instead of reading is because ive already reached my reading breaking point where my eyes glaze over and the words go in one and out the other. its only been two hours. difficult language i can handle fine, verbosity is fine, i inhaled the ender stuff and only took breaks when osc pissed me off, but stella maris is information overload in a way that i’ve never experienced before. im like, texting three separate people all the time. oh i should vet this w my math guy. i need to show this to my psych classmate. this has to go to my orthopedics bestie.

i started this book saw the page number and went oh sure. its half the length of the passenger. the style means that it’ll contain less words overall too. i should be able to finish this on a three hour hsr ride. WRONG. i CANT. it’s TOO DIFFICULT. im running into roadblocks very similar to what i felt when i read the passenger: dont know place/name/context/big word. except im finding stella maris to be even more difficult because unlike some nautical jargon or random place in the midwestern usa that i can just look up, i cant. i think its impossible to even begin to comprehend all this math.

that’s definitely part of the charm of stella maris. the format of audio transcripts creates a much more intimate connection between the characters and the reader. the target demographic of this novel, though niche, is definitely not as niche as to comprise only of genius mathematicians with a burning passion for music and a hatred of psychology. the reader might be a master in one of these fields, but alicia outsmarts them in it along with all others. viewed through this lens, the reader is the doctor. the reader is the one who converses with alicia, trying their best to piece together a mind that is so extraordinarily genius and extraordinarily tormented. it’s a position of emotional significance. the reader sits through these audio recordings because they want to understand alicia. and to understand alicia is to love her. (this is a certified when i truly understand my enemy i love him moment)

all of that sits in stark contrast to western’s narration in the passenger.

i wrote an entire paragraph but tumblr fucking ate it. im pissed. its ok. for love i’ll write it again.

western’s narration is detached. it’s impersonal. mccarthy’s clinical and direct use of language alienates the viewer and prevents the formation of any sincere rapport, allowing only mild sympathy for western’s continued suffering. the reader is merely an observer, piecing together the life of a strange, curious creature through inference and deduction. nor is the reader meant to empathize with him. he’s the one who chose to abandon alicia, the one reckless enough to chose race car driving over his degree, and therefore the one who shoulders alone the responsibility of alicia’s death—or so he thinks. in a sense, because western is comparatively lucid, the detached narration becomes almost a punishment for the guilt he’s assigned to himself. he’s not the one in the mental asylum, afterall.

its interesting to me how mccarthy presents this duo to the audience. i have many Thoughts on alicia’s sexuality and stuff but i should finish the book before i synthesize those thoughts. anyway. thanks for reading 👍