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#and the motivations! are all! different!!!
4theitgirls · 3 days
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productivity apps for self improvement
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pinterest
you know i had to include the ultimate form of social media. pinterest is one of the only truly peaceful social media apps out there and focuses on sharing photos to your themed boards. this app is everything if you’re into making vision boards, moodboards, beauty, productivity, and really anything else. there’s something there for everyone!
finch
this is a wonderful self-care app, in which you take care of a bird while taking care of yourself! this is my new favorite app. i use the free version and it is adorable. the app asks you some questions about your goals and how you feel about self care, and gives you some daily goals based on your answers, but you can delete and add goals of your own. the more you log in and track your goals, the more adventures your bird can go on and the more they grow. i recommend this app to absolutely everyone and i will never shut up about it.
gymshark training
this is a free training app including many different types and styles of workouts. you can search for workouts based on duration, equipment used, the targeted muscle, and so on. you can also add workouts and plans of your own and track your progress.
i am sober
this is my favorite app for if you have something you want to quit. this isn’t just for substances or alcohol, but can also be used for quitting sugar, skin picking, caffeine, fast food, and so many other things. you can track your progress, review your days, make pledges, and connect with others who are struggling with the same thing you are. you are also given motivational quotes and reminders when you log into the app. there is an option for a subscription, but i use the free version and have had no problems with it at all.
study bunny: focus timer
an adorable focus timer where you gain coins with every goal/time you accomplish something with your focus timer and you can spend your coins on cute little accessories for your bunny! the only real issue with this app is that the ads are kind of crazy, and it’s $15 a month to go ad-free.
flora - green focus
this app includes a pomodoro timer and plants a tree in a rural community based on how often you stay focused using the timer on the app. the app does not plant a tree unless you opt for their subscription, which is $2 per year and allows you to plant one tree for 120 hours of focused time. you can also plant a tree every 24 hours with the $10 plan.
focus to-do: focus timer&tasks
this app combines a pomodoro timer with a daily to-do list. the app is free to use, but includes additional features for those with a subscription, which is $3 for every three months or $9 for a lifetime membership.
balance: meditation & sleep
a great app that includes nightly reviews, meditations, and sleep sounds. this app has great reviews, but it’s worth noting that it’s not completely free. it includes a trial, after which is $12 per month, or $70 per year.
insight timer - meditate & sleep
just as it sounds, this is another great app for meditations, ambient sounds for sleep, and progress tracking. there are tons of free things included in the app, but if you want to unlock everything, the premium plan is $10 per month or $60 per year.
structured - daily planner
an app with great reviews intended to help organize your daily tasks into achievable goals and track your progress. the app has basic features for free, but also includes a premium subscription if you want to unlock all the features.
routineflow: guided routines
this app caters to those who have difficulties staying focused and maintaining a set routine by guiding your routine for you and managing your progress. the app gives you one routine for free, but if you want another, you would need to pay for the $30 annual subscription.
how we feel
a wonderful free journaling app developed by therapists and scientists for logging your emotions, talking to other users, and tracking your mood patterns.
gentler streak fitness tracker
if you’re tired of the constant work and grind mentality, this may be the app for you. this app takes a gentler approach to fitness by tracking exercise, giving encouragement, and notifying you if you are overworking yourself. the app itself is free, but certain features require a subscription, which is $8 per month or $50 per year.
glo | yoga and meditation app
glo is a highly rated app for yoga, pilates, and meditation. unlike most of the other apps listed, you can’t really access much on glo for free. to access the full courses, they offer two plans: $30 per month or $245 per year.
waterllama
another adorable app that lets you track your water intake with a cute llama! super motivating and is free for basic features. if you want to unlock all features, the subscription is $7 per year.
mindllama
made by the same people as waterllama, this app allows you to practice and track your meditation and breathwork practice with a cute llama! like waterllama, the app is free, but some features require a subscription, which varies depending on whether you want the premium plan, the anxiety relief plan, or the sleep focused plan.
daily bean - simplest journal
another super cute app that helps you track your days and moods. the app itself is free, but a premium plan is also offered, which is $20 per year.
schmoody: mood & habit tracker
this app aims to help you through depression, anxiety, and/or adhd by helping you track your habits, talk to other users, and give you the resources to get you back on track. the free version includes the “essentials” to support mental health and well-being, but they also offer a premium version, which unlocks more resources and personalized options. the subscription is $15 per month, $60 per year, or $100 for a lifetime membership.
meditation timer - zenitizer
this is a meditation timer that focuses on simplicity and organization while tracking your meditation practice. a free version is available with a limited amount of content, but a premium version is also offered, which is $3 per month, $20 per year, or a $50 one-time payment.
mineral - gratitude journal
this is a free journaling app that is secure in the fact that you have to use face id in order to access your journal. this app is definitely more simple, but effective nonetheless.
focus keeper: productive timer
this app is a popular pomodoro-style timer app. i’ve heard that this app works wonders for many people with adhd. the app is free, but includes additional content and features for those with a subscription.
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gyubakeries · 2 days
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𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀 | c.sc (f)
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a/n: for some reason the ask got deleted 😭 but an anon asked for something scoups related, so, anon, if you're seeing this, hi! thanks for requesting! i kept brainstorming, and finally came up with this, so i hope you like it! (sorry the ask got deleted im hopeless w technology 😭)
word count: 2.1k contents: seungcheol x afab!reader , gymbro!cheol , i have 0 gym knowledge forgive me , seungcheol and reader are dating , bullying mingyu is a canon event , lots of fluff , cheol being a green flag as always , slight angst , mentions of insecurities (but they have healthy communication about it!) , just overall cute vibes !
"i wanna go to the gym with you."
seungcheol looks up from his phone to direct his gaze at you. it's a thursday night, a rare day off for the both of you, and you had been in the process of selecting a movie for the night when you suddenly spoke.
"what?" seungcheol asks again, not sure if he heard you right the first time.
"i want to go to the gym with you," you repeat, meeting seungcheol's eyes reluctantly, trying to mask your ulterior motive with a smile.
seungcheol was taken aback, but don't get him wrong. he was a regular at the gym, but in your last three years of dating, he had never heard you wanting to accompany him to the gym. instead, you'd always said that you'd rather be at home than be surrounded by sweaty people, including seungcheol himself.
so why the sudden interest?
"babe, everything okay?" seungcheol asks. he knows asking questions may seem rude, but he notices the way the smile you're shooting at him doesn't feel genuine at all.
"yeah! i just wanted to see what was so great about the gym for you to spend hours there," you say, making up an excuse on the fly, hoping you sounded convincing enough.
seungcheol knew you through and through, and he also knew that you weren't telling him the entire truth. but instead of prying, he decides to agree to your request.
"alright,come with me tomorrow," he nods. "it's gonna be pretty intense though. mingyu tells me i'm a really strict gym trainer." he jokes.
"it's okay," you laugh, finally cracking a real smile. "i have a feeling i'll become your favorite student in no time."
"we'll see about that," seungcheol teases, and you drop the topic, shifting your attention back to choosing a movie.
seungcheol needs to get to the bottom of this.
-
the next day, seungcheol comes home from work, and like clockwork, he changes into his workout clothes and grabs his gym bag, ready to head out, but-
something feels different about today though....
"excuse me? were you forgetting your star student at home?" comes your voice, and he finally remembers. he turns to see you waiting in the kitchen, and any suspicions he had about your strange request melt away at the sight of you dolled up in the cutest workout fit. your hair was up in a ponytail, and you were wearing a baby pink sports bra with a matching pair of leggings. you even had a cute duffel bag packed with you.
"aw, baby, you look adorable," he coos. he walks towards the kitchen and stops in front of you to place a kiss to your forehead, his arms wrapping around your waist to pull you into a hug. "also, i'd never forget my favorite student." he says defensively, and you laugh at his cuteness.
"sure, big guy," you chuckle. "let's get going, shall we?"
-
whatever worries had left his brain when he saw you at home had come back to him ten-fold at the gym. he started you off with some basic warm-up exercises and then the treadmill. the both of you jogged next to each other for a while. you had found all of this manageable until now, even though all the physical exertion had made you all sweaty, which in turn made you uncomfortable. you mask your uneasiness though, not wanting to alert seungcheol.
but he had already seen the signs of discomfort on your face. after the treadmill, he decided that he needs to take you home.
"i'm actually feeling really tired today, babe," he fake-yawns while you're sipping on some water. "how about we go home now and come back another day?"
"woah, you're tired just from some cardio?" someone speaks up from behind him, and it's mingyu.
how is he always at the gym?? seungcheol wonders, cursing mingyu's timing.
"i just had a long day at work. what are you doing here?" seungcheol rolls his eyes.
"working out, duh," mingyu retorts. "didn't you clock in late to work today, though? i've seen you less tired while you were working on three days of no sleep."
seungcheol really wants to punch mingyu in the face right now.
"if you're really feeling tired, we can head home," you butt in before seungcheol throws a dumbell at mingyu.
seungcheol would be relieved, if not for the way you look dejected and upset, and seungcheol would rather walk through fire than be the reason for that frown on your face, so he relents.
"it's okay, i'm feeling fine," he smiles. "we can continue, baby."
"just don't be all gross and couple-y," mingyu adds, and quickly scurries away before seungcheol can elbow him in the stomach.
after mingyu leaves, seungcheol gets you started on some basic squats. he shows you the correct posture, even helps you for the first few times till you get the hang of it.
finally, you gain the confidence to do the squats on your own, so you start off with a goal of completing 10. by the time you're on squat number 4, there's a burn in your thighs. you've heard people saying that it's supposedly a good burn, but right now, it's making you feel like your legs are going to snap into two, like twigs.
not wanting to embarrass yourself, you push through the remaining squats, collapsing to the floor after you finish them.
"hey! that was great!" seungcheol smiles cheerily. "i'm so proud of you. let's take a break and then we can move onto something else."
the next challenge: push-ups.
while you weren't a frequent gym-goer, you had an idea of how a push-up should be done. guided by seungcheol's instructions, you find yourself in the position to carry out some push-ups. once again, you set a goal of 10 and you start.
at push-up number 7, your arms give out and you lose your balance, your forehead bumping with the ground.
"shit. y/n, are you okay?" seungcheol is by your side in a blink, helping you up into a sitting posture. you look around the gym, and thankfully there weren't a lot of people around to see your disastrous attempt at push-ups, but you still felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment.
"i'm sorry," you sniffle, tears welling up in your eyes as seungcheol gently rubs your forehead. "i'm sorry for being bad at this."
seungcheol freezes when he sees you cry. he knows you, and you weren't the type to cry from such a small failure. the uneasiness twists his gut; something is really wrong.
"baby, you have nothing to be sorry for," he says, tone firm yet gentle. "let's go home and talk about this, okay? you did a good job today, and you should rest."
leaving no room for negotiation, you let seungcheol gather both your belongings and walk you back home.
once you reach your shared apartment, you're aware of how sweaty and gross you are, your nose crinkling with disgust.
"i need to shower..." you mumble.
"you can head in first. call me if you need anything, okay?" seungcheol suggests. "i'll start on dinner."
you nod timidly and head towards the shower. a long and relaxing shower later, you're emerging from the bedroom in your comfiest pajamas, and a red spot on your forehead from the incident at the gym. you walk into the kitchen to see seungcheol putting down dinner on the table, freshly showered.
"you used the guest bathroom?" you ask, and he nods. you can tell that there's something on his mind, and you know its related to what happened today. knowing seungcheol, he likes to communicate whatever he has on his mind to maintain trust between you, so you eat dinner in silence, anticipating the conversation after.
once the dishes are washed and put away, you quickly go to bed, hoping to avoid any tough conversations by falling asleep early. but seungcheol is too aware of your tendencies, so he follows you to the bedroom, sitting next to you on the bed as you lay down.
"does it hurt a lot?" he asks, breaking the silence.
"my forehead? not that much. but the rest of my body is really sore," you admit truthfully.
"should i get you a painkiller for it?" seungcheol offers, and you shake your head. you've seen him come home from the gym complaining of sore muscles, but he never takes any medication for it, and you don't want to seem weak for doing so.
"you can take one, it won't make you weak," seungcheol says, as if he's read your thoughts. "what's going on, baby? i know something is bothering you, tell me what it is. let me help you."
the gentle tone to his voice makes you tear up immediately. you bring your hands up to your face as you cry. an alarmed seungcheol is quick to hug you, whispering comforting words into your ear.
once you've calmed down, you realize it's time to tell him the truth.
"i wanted to have something in common with you. all our friends and their partners have a shared interest. mingyu and his girlfriend love cooking, wonwoo and his girlfriend like photography; even minghao managed to end up with someone who loves tea as much as him. i just wanted to share something with you. i realized that you and i don't have a lot in common. everyone says 'opposites attract' but to what extent? that's why i thought of going to the gym, so that we could have something to share."
seungcheol is silent for a few moments, and you bite the inside of your cheek nervously while you wait for his response.
"y/n, you're the one person on this earth i have found a perfect match in. you and i have a lot more in common than you think. like the fact that you're the only person who supports my 'dipping french fries in milkshake' agenda," seungcheol cracks a soft smile, holding your hands in his.
"you don't have to force yourself to do things just to share an interest with me, baby. i love you for who you are. you're a wonderful artist, and i'm absolutely pathetic at drawing basic human figures. that doesn't mean we don't work together," seungcheol explains, hoping that his words make sense to you.
"i know, but i just- i just got worried that one day you'd be tired of having to deal with someone so different from you," you sigh, confessing the thought that had been plaguing your mind for a few weeks. "i don't want to lose you, cheol. that's why i did all this. but all i've really done is embarrass myself..."
seungcheol's lips draw into a pout as he crawls onto the bed, laying down next to you. he covers both of you under the blanket and pulls your body closer to him, your head cradled against his chest, and his arm wrapped around your waist.
"i'll never get tired of you. you're the love of my life, and i like the fact that every day we spend together, i get to learn something new about you. there's a familiarity in that too, you know?" he says, and the warmth in his voice makes your heart melt.
"ever since the day i met you, i've wanted to know who you are. i've wanted to know what makes you smile and cry, what food you don't like so i'll never bring it up, what your favorite disney princess is, even how much sugar you like in your coffee. and i'm so grateful to be able to learn every small thing about you, because that's how i show my love for you."
you pull away slightly from his embrace, meeting seungcheol's soft gaze.
"i love you the way you are, and no amount of differences could ever stop me from loving you. even if you were the north pole and i was the south, i'd do everything in my power to be with you, you get that?"
"how'd i get so lucky?" you whisper, eyes welling up again. "i love you too, so much. you- you made me cry, you idiot." you chuckle wetly, slapping his chest playfully.
"you're just a sap," seungcheol teases, but he rubs your back comfortingly nonetheless. "anyways, you're not going to be following me to the gym just for the sake of it anymore. i already think you're perfect the way you are, but if you ever do want to go, you should do it only because you want to, okay?"
"you don't have to worry about it," you dismiss his concerns. "from the second i step foot into the gym and got attacked by the stench of sweat, i promised to never come back."
"hey! that's rude!" seungcheol gasps dramatically. you can only laugh at the way a grown, 29 year-old man pouts like a toddler.
yeah, you really were lucky to have him.
-fin.
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asidian · 1 day
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One thing I adore about Dead Boy Detectives is how brilliant the first ten minutes are. The pacing is incredible. You meet the boys, learn who they are, get a peek at what they want, and are shown what their strengths and weaknesses are.
Straight out the gate, you know that Charles is impulsive and more physically protective, and that Edwin is more intellectual and prone to magic. You learn magic exists and this is a setting where an infinite backpack can happen. Edwin gets a chance to show off his deductive skills with their client, and Charles gets to show off his people skills with both the client and the WWI ghost. Six minutes in and we already know these characters.
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You learn that this is how these characters function together, and that they know each other well enough to know each others' strengths and weaknesses and rely on each other and compensate for them, respectively. The pacing is lively and attention-grabbing, and the back-and-forth between the office and the scene while they're on the job allows a fantastic showcase of the contrast between how they work together in different situations.
Then we get a look at the deeper need that motivates our two ghosts: staying together, against all odds, even after death, even in the face of Death herself.
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And then we segue into another brilliant bit of exposition. Instead of a long, stodgy talking scene that would slow down the pacing, we get shown slices of Crystal acting strangely to explain what's going on.
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In the space of ten minutes, we have met our characters, know what drives them, know their status quo, and are ready for that status quo to be upended, all without a single exposition dump.
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No wonder this series series was met with critical acclaim. This is brilliant character writing and pacing. I write for a living, and this intro scene had me turning to the person next to me, saying, "THAT'S how you do it."
There's so much to appreciate about Dead Boy Detectives, but I feel like the script doesn't get anywhere near enough attention. Standing ovation for the absolutely brilliant writing, honestly.
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pastryfication · 2 days
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hii please could you do another leclerc sister! reader imagine where arthur gets dropped by ferrari or dosent get a seat and he’s upset and reader and charles comfort him? x
the weight of the world
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pairing: leclerc sister!reader x leclerc brothers note: thank you for requesting!! as an older sister, this was very easy to write.
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the news hit like a harsh punch to the gut. arthur had been dropped by the ferrari driver academy, and without a seat for the next f2 season, it felt like everything he had worked so hard for was slipping through his fingers.
your childhood house was eerily quiet as you entered, the rooms filled with the heavy silence of disappointment. arthur had withdrawn from everyone, retreating to the living room where he sat, slumped against the couch, his head buried in his hands.
you hovered near the doorway, watching him from afar. his shoulders were stiff, his body rigid with the weight of what had happened. arthur had always been resilient—he fought hard for everything, just like all of you had, but today, he looked fragile, like the world had finally caught up to him, and the cracks were starting to show.
you walked in quietly, lowering yourself onto the couch beside him. “arthur?” you called softly, careful not to startle him.
he didn’t respond. his hands stayed tangled in his hair, and his eyes were focused on the floor. his breathing was shallow, and you could tell he was trying to hold everything in, but his walls were crumbling, slowly but surely.
“i’ve failed,” he muttered, his voice rough and barely audible. “i’ve let everyone down.”
your heart clenched at the sound of his voice, raw and laced with pain. you reached out gently, placing a hand on his back, rubbing slow circles. "arthur, you haven’t let anyone down. this is just a setback.”
he shook his head, his jaw tight. “but i have. look at everything charles has done. he’s won in f2 and now he’s winning races in f1. and me? i can’t even secure a seat for next year. i’m nothing compared to him.”
the self-doubt, the frustration—it was all spilling out now, years of pressure building up, finally breaking through. arthur had always been chasing something, always pushing himself to live up to the expectations placed on him, the ones he thought came from others, but really, they came from inside him. he had built his entire career trying to prove that he belonged, not just to himself but to everyone watching. and now, with ferrari dropping him, it felt like confirmation of his worst fears.
“you are not a failure,” you said, your voice firm but gentle. “you’re on your own journey, arthur. it doesn’t matter what charles is doing—this is your path, and one setback doesn’t change how talented you are.”
arthur glanced up at you then, his eyes rimmed red, glossy with unshed tears. the sight reminded you of the little boy who would come crying to you in the middle of the night because of a nightmare, and your heart clenched painfully. “but what if . . . what if i never make it?” his voice broke slightly, and it was like a punch to your chest, hearing him voice the fear that had clearly been gnawing at him for so long. “what if this is as far as i go?”
before you could respond, the door creaked open, and charles stepped into the room. you glanced at him briefly, noticing the concern etched across his face. he had rushed over the second he heard, but now, seeing arthur like this, he hesitated. charles wasn’t used to comforting people like this—he supported you in different ways, always the one who fought through his pain in silence, pushing forward no matter how bad things got.
he stepped forward cautiously, unsure of what to say, his usual confidence nowhere to be found. he looked at you, almost as if asking for guidance. this wasn’t a situation he could fix with strategy or motivation; this required something softer, something more emotional.
charles crouched in front of arthur, placing a hand on his knee. “arthur,” he began quietly, his voice tentative, “you haven’t let anyone down.” there was a small hesitation in his words, as though he was uncertain how to reach his brother in this moment. “i know it feels bad now, but this isn’t the end.”
arthur barely reacted. he didn’t lift his head, didn’t shift his position. it was as if the weight of the news had pinned him in place. charles was trying—he always did—but it was clear he wasn’t sure what to say, or how to truly reach your brother.
you moved closer to arthur, your heart breaking at how still and defeated he seemed. “arthur,” you whispered, your voice soft, coaxing him out of his shell. “come here.”
at first, he hesitated, but then the dam broke. he turned toward you slowly, collapsing into your arms as his body trembled with silent sobs. his grip was tight, desperate, like he was afraid you’d let go if he didn’t hold on hard enough. you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him close, holding him as he cried. your hand rested on the back of his head, and you gently ran your fingers through his hair, whispering soft reassurances.
charles watched, his face full of concern and helplessness. he stayed where he was, not quite knowing what to do next. comfort didn’t come naturally to him in moments like this. he was used to being the one who kept everything together, but seeing arthur like this—seeing him so vulnerable—made him unsure of himself.
you met charles’ eyes over arthur’s shoulder, giving him a small, encouraging nod. arthur wasn’t ready for advice or tough love right now. he just needed to feel like he wasn’t alone, and you understood that.
charles heart warmed as he watched you. the way you instinctively knew how to ease arthur’s pain, how you could make him feel safe with just your presence—it was something he wasn’t sure he could ever do as easily as you. charles cared deeply for his siblings, but watching you now, he realized how much of a rock you were for your younger brother—how much of a rock you were for him too. your patience, your quiet strength—it was something he admired more than he could put into words.
arthur clung to you like a lifeline, his body shaking with the effort of holding everything in for so long. “i’ve let you all down,” he choked out between shaky breaths. “i’ve failed, especially you, charles. you’ve done so much for me, and now . . . now i’ve ruined it.”
charles shifted, his brow furrowed. “arthur, you’ve never let me down. not once,” he said, his voice softening as he found the right words. “you’re not in competition with me. you’ve already accomplished so much, more than you give yourself credit for. i’ve never compared you to me, and neither should you.”
arthur shook his head against your shoulder, still clinging to you. “but you’re always so strong. i don’t know if i’m like that. i don’t know if i can come back from this.”
you held him tighter, rubbing his back soothingly. “you are strong,” you murmured. “you’re stronger than you realize, arthur. just because your path is different from charles’ doesn’t mean it’s over. it’s okay to feel lost, but we’re here. we’ll figure it out together.”
charles nodded, stepping forward and gently placing a hand on arthur’s back. “you don’t have to figure everything out right now,” he said, his voice calmer now, less unsure. “we’ll take it one step at a time. i believe in you, arthur, and so does everyone else.”
arthur sniffled, his grip on you loosening slightly as he pulled back to look at both you and charles, his eyes still filled with doubt, but there was a flicker of hope. “i just . . . i don’t want to disappoint you guys.”
“you haven’t,” you whispered, brushing a tear from his cheek. “and you never will. we’re proud of you no matter what—charles, lorenzo, mum and i are always proud of you. always.”
charles leaned in closer, his hand still on arthur’s back. “you’ve got so much more to give, arthur. this is just a bump in the road. you’re going to come back stronger, and when you do, we’ll be right here with you.”
as charles looked between you and arthur, something stirred inside him. it struck him how lucky arthur was to have you, and how lucky he was too. not everyone had a sister who could hold everything together like you did, especially when things fell apart. there was a strength in you that charles knew he could never replicate, and it made him admire you even more. he made a mental note to tell you later—how grateful he was, how much he admired how you cared for arthur, how you seemed to know exactly what he needed, even when he didn’t.
arthur leaned into you again, this time not out of desperation but for the comfort you were offering, knowing that no matter how hard things seemed right now, he wasn’t alone.
and he would never be alone. not as long as he had you.
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starcurtain · 3 days
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Hello! I just saw your latest post and you might have been referring to my ask if it was the one about Ratiorine's differing philosophies or of what philosophies they abide by (existentialism, absurdism, etc) then that's me! If you weren't referring to that I apologize for the confusion. Sending it off anon this time so maybe it doesn't disappear 🥲
Sorry for the ask disappearing the first time; I'm not sure what happened, and I was so sad because I had been carefully holding on to it to answer it! I'm glad you were able to resend.
I do have to say first that philosophy is not my area of expertise, so there may be much more qualified philosophy buffs out there who can answer this more accurately than me, but I'll give it a go with my personal understandings of the characters:
First, Ratio is the easier of the two I think. As many people have said, he's a good fit for existentialism. His entire shtick is basically believing in the power of the individual to improve and enrich their own life, to fight valiantly regardless of the hardships imposed by their life's circumstances, and to make themself into a better person by their own choices.
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It's important to underscore that this means Ratio believes in self-determination, in the idea that people's lives are not foreordained but are actually actively shaped each day by personal decisions. Therefore, people have inherent freedom to decide the course of their own lives by accepting what they approve of, refusing to accept what they disapprove of, and harnessing their own individual power to ultimately achieve self-actualization.
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Essentially, Ratio works under the impression that life is not guided by something as intangible as destiny, and no matter where you start off in life, what ultimately happens to you is within your control (or at least within the control of whoever controls you). This is likely a small part of why it grates on him so badly that he wasn't recognized by Nous, because the fact that one can dedicate everything to a goal and still not achieve that goal runs contrary to his central philosophy.
If he believes that people have the power to determine the course of their own lives, then what does it say about him, who fought so hard to do exactly as he claims even idiots can do--seize control his own fate--and yet didn't succeed? Are there some things outside of man's power? It's enough to make even a renowned doctor question himself, and Ratio decided to come out on the side of "It's a personal failing, not a flaw in my philosophy." He literally said "Skill issue" to himself.
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Changing tack a tiny bit here, I think it's also important to emphasize that there is a difference between existentialism and nihilism even though these philosophies dovetail. Again, I'm not an expert in philosophy, so my understanding is very limited, but the basic idea of existentialism is that "existence comes before essence"--that is, things start as a blank slate and gain nature and meaning after the fact. We are not created by some grand design, nor is there any inherent "purpose for living." Things just exist because they exist.
This is where existentialism intersects with nihilism, at the starting point that existence is inherently meaningless. But, in my personal opinion, nihilism as a philosophy fails to move beyond that. Pure nihilism is ultimately self-defeating because it leaves us with no motivation to commit to growth. It's a philosophy antithetical to the continuation of life as we know it. Existence is meaningless and any meaning you personally derive from existence is also meaningless, so why bother attempting to derive any meaning at all? This complete apathy is the Device IX that Star Rail paints as so dangerous.
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And Ratio is not this way at all. His philosophy absolutely reaffirms that life can have meaning, so long as people create that meaning for themselves. He simultaneously asserts that anything that people create is not meaningless ...which basically means that meaning itself cannot be meaningless. (If that makes any sense to anyone.)
Frankly, I would argue that this philosophy may be a core part of why Ratio has not been recognized by Nous so far, rather than simply his "being a good person." (Nous is a robotic AI super-computer, why would THEY care about the presence or lack of human empathy?) Ultimately, Ratio's central philosophy about people being capable of determining their own fates and purposes also applies to his understanding of knowledge--knowledge is not something which is inherent in certain beings from birth or limited to the purview of the "special" (geniuses), but is attainable by all people. People are not "born talented" or "born untalented," they are simply "educated" or "uneducated," with the only barrier between these categories being one's own personal willingness to change. The mundane can become the divine--if they work hard enough at it.
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Thus, knowledge is not wealth to be hoarded, but a currency to be spent to enrich other members of humanity.
(By the way, completely random aside--it also surprises me that everyone relates Ratio to Alhaitham from Genshin when they literally have such a glaring fundamental discrepancy in their understanding of the concept of wisdom... But anyway, back on topic!)
Ratio may (sort of) respect the members of the Genius Society, may recognize their incredible knowledge and abilities, but at the heart of the matter lies a single all-important question: Does Ratio even really believe in "genius" as a distinction (other than as a concept to insult himself)? Does he truly believe there is barrier between brilliance and idiocy that "ordinary people" can never cross?
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He speaks convincingly about geniuses being different from "the ordinary," but if his core belief is that people have the power to pull themselves up out of despair and achieve greatness through effort and self-development, rather than some form of luck or god-given talent at birth, then... do born "geniuses" even really exist? Is there really an insurmountable difference between brilliant and mundane?
If knowledge is the equalizer of all sentient beings, do we not all have at least the initial capacity to become geniuses?
I personally think this central distinction about the capacity for knowledge among all humanity is the actual deciding factor in Ratio's rejection from the Genius Society, because, at the end of the day... how do you become a member of the "Genius Society" when you fundamentally reject the distinction of "genius" as an exclusive category from the start?
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Ratio wants to share knowledge and uplift everyone (even if he thinks most people are starting off at the rock bottom known as idiocy).
His mission is diametrically opposed to the concept of a "Genius Society" in the first place.
He wanted in to the cool kids club because he desperately craves validation and acceptance, but the philosophical values of the Genius Society are ultimately incompatible with his own. In short, he would have to cease to be "Veritas Ratio" to succeed in joining the geniuses.
Okay, okay, back to the original point again, and just one more note about Ratio: Even though existentialism also goes hand-in-hand with absurdism, I don't think Ratio is far enough down the philosophical rabbit hole to believe in the wider definition of absurdism. Although I think he does agree with the inherent meaninglessness of existence, I don't think he views existence itself as truly irrational and the universe as as manifestation of unknowable chaos. I think he'd at least like to imagine that there are some ontological principles and inherent laws governing the operations of reality, and I think he does believe that certain things can be predicted with the application of enough thought... He certainly seems to believe in some form of "objective truth," at the very least.
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I think he'd at least like to believe the universe is semi-orderly, even if he might deep down admit this is also wishful thinking.
So, to me he reads as a strong metaphor for pure existentialism, with deliberate rejections to both nihilism's apathy and absurdism's lean toward solely subjective reality.
PHEW, this is already long and I still have a whole other character to talk about... I had more to say about this topic than I thought. Sorry for the long read!
Anyway... Aventurine.
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I've seen all sorts of things thrown around for Aventurine's philosophy, and while I think he does inherit a bit of Acheron's absurdism by the end of 2.1, I actually don't think Aventurine is an absurdist, an existentialist, or a nihilist.
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I think Aventurine is a struggling fatalist.
He doesn't like it. We see him actively question it, but ultimately, he does come back to the concept of destiny over and over.
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First, I think it's important to draw a clear distinction between Ratio and Aventurine: Ratio's existentialism is a philosophy that technically works even in a theological vacuum. Nous doesn't have to exist for Ratio's philosophy to function. Ratio's belief in the self-determination of humanity is, in fact, somewhat opposed to belief in aeons in the first place, and only works because technically the aeons of Star Rail used to be human (or were originally human creations). It's essentially an atheist viewpoint.
But Aventurine is a religious character. Like, he's just... religious. That's a fact about him. Even though we do hear his doubts, at the end of the day, he actually believes in Gaiathra, and believing in a omniscient supernatural being that is not human in origin (is from outside the aeon system) comes with a whole set of philosophical foundations that most aeon-worshipping characters just don't have in Star Rail. (Sunday is the obvious exception here, by the way.)
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Kakavasha's like the one practicing pagan in the middle of an atheist convention. Awkward.
Being more serious: Religion requires faith. Faith requires the ability to believe in things you cannot verify with empirical facts. To believe in things you can only feel, never see. The belief that a goddess is watching over you, blessing you, and guiding you requires you to also accept the idea that events in your life are not always in your own control--that some of what occurs to you is decided by powers beyond your comprehension.
In essence, faith requires belief in fate. And that leads to fatalism.
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No matter how much he doesn't like it, no matter how much we see him struggle with it, Aventurine does actually seem to believe in the concept of fate. He believes that some events in life are destined to occur, that some things are outside of individuals' control, and that ultimately not everything can be changed.
This is the dead opposite of Ratio's mindset: No matter how hard we fight, how far we push ourselves... in the end, sometimes people fail. Sometimes the only answer to our endless struggles is that we die, as we were destined to, before ever achieving the greatness we sought or the futures we were promised.
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As an aside, I don't think faith or religion are necessarily the only factors connecting Aventurine to this particular philosophy either. Even removing theological aspects from the conversation, his extreme focus on the gambling aesthetic suggests a strong connection to fatalism too--if not a goddess, then one's fate may as well be in the hands of luck itself, of the whims of the rolling dice--or the push and pull of "powers that be," those figures of authority in the room where it happens, who make their shady deals according to preset rules and expectations, every bet resulting in an ultimately predictable outcome.
(He keeps gambling and gambling, hoping that he'll get a different result than the one he knows is inevitable...)
This is, of course, an inherently pessimistic mindset, a perfect dark-mirror to Ratio's deep-down optimism. Fatalism puts humanity into a position of powerlessness. All hopes and dreams are given over to the goddess, by whose judgment and whims the actual events of one's life are decided. Pain and poverty are inevitable trials. Suffering and death are foreordained.
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And yet Aventurine has to cling to this, as much as he doubts it, as much as he hates the idea that things in his life are beyond his power to control.
Because if fate doesn't exist... If it wasn't destiny, if the tragedies of his life weren't trials from the goddess, if things weren't supposed to go this way... Then every single thing in his life really is meaningless. Everything he suffered, everyone he loved and loss, his mother's and sister's sacrifices, the torment he went through--just sheer bad luck. All of it, completely and utterly meaningless.
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How can you convince yourself to keep living, in the face of such supreme and all-encompassing Nihility?
This is the central struggle of Aventurine's character, the actual mental and emotional journey we see him undertaking from 2.0 to 2.1. He is literally on the precipice, swinging between a viewpoint that he hates--his fatalistic belief in destiny--and an entirely self-defeating philosophy--nihilism--whose only possible final outcome is suicide.
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This is what his talk with Acheron at the end of 2.1 is all about. This is how she saves him. In that final cutscene, we witness Aventurine reach a mental compromise, managing to finally reconcile his necessary faith in the concept of destiny with the reality that life may truly begin meaningless--but beginning meaningless does not mean staying meaningless, and believing in destiny does not bar you from making your own choices or finding your own purpose in life.
Later on in Penacony's story, we literally see Acheron use Ratio's philosophy to reject the same nihility that crept into Aventurine's:
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Acheron wards off nihility's apathy through an absurdism all her own, but one which manages to enclose both Ratio's and Aventurine's otherwise incompatible mindsets: We have no way of ever knowing for certain whether the events of our lives are fated or mere nonsense. We have no way of knowing if our choices are our own or foreordained. But we don't need to know this to find meaning and value in them. Whether life is nothing more than unpredictable chaos or a predetermined pattern of cause and effect, what matters is what you make of it.
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Ultimately, I think that this post has really helped me recognize just how well Aventurine and Ratio work as philosophical foils.
They really are perfect opposites.
Aventurine's fatalism is deterministic, while Ratio's existentialism is self-deterministic. Aventurine's philosophy is inherently pessimistic; Ratio's is inherently optimistic. Ratio's philosophy operates on a core belief in the freedom of humanity to decide their own paths in life, while Aventurine hates but does ultimately believe that people aren't really in control, that even if no gods are guiding us, we can't rise above our own natures. Ratio's philosophy makes meaning from growth; Aventurine's makes meaning from loss...
And they both struggle with fundamental doubts in their own philosophies, core questions that are directly tied to their own lives. Aventurine worries that his faith might be misplaced, that destiny might not exist, and that everything he suffered might have been in pointless, empty vain. Ratio faces the crisis of recognizing that his core belief in the power of humankind to determine their own paths and make their own meaning might not actually apply to everyone--because it doesn't seem to apply to himself.
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It's literally only by bridging this philosophical binary with Acheron's anti-Nihility absurdist rhetoric that we can reach some sort of healthy outcome. That's why it takes both Ratio's note and Acheron's comments to finally lead Aventurine to acceptance. Ratio probably needs a little bit of Aventurine's "If you didn't make it into the Genius Society, there's got to be a reason" mindset to finally reach some peace with his situation too.
I'm not even a philosophy expert and even I can see that there's really only one takeaway here: These two characters were totally written with each other in mind.
Aventurine and Ratio need each other on core metaphysical levels! 😂
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It's so good guys. You can't see it, but I'm making chef's kisses, I promise.
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court-jobi · 2 days
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((banner by me! I don't own Horikoshi's work OR the mindblowing art of @gsony24))
Pairing: Midoriya x reader (support-hero!reader x teacher Izuku)
Words: 2.5k
Rating: G~
Warnings: comfort fic, tooth-rotting fluff here y'all, established relationship, work stress (livin' vicariously), talks of the future, a few fem pronouns used, but generally gender-neutral
Summary:
Izuku letting himself into your home after a long day has become comfortable background noise, and one you love to hear while you're bogged down. Work has been following you home all week. He's proud of you, without a doubt... But equally concerned when he sees your dinner half-eaten, your mind scatterbrained and racing faster than he can anchor you, and your angel eyes in desperate need of some TLC. He's cemented his place in your heart- and sees no reason he can't make himself at home here already.
A/N: do I have bigger fics in mind? Yes. Did I write this instead of sleeping bc I love soft, encouraging Deku? Also yes. Izuku Midoriya is a motivational speaker.
For my My Hero Academia Masterlist, check it out here!
Read on AO3
“Hey honey! I’m here!”
Over the tinny, background chatter of a podcast streaming from your phone, you call back to Izuku letting himself in.
“Hey you~” You throw interest into your voice, but still stayed tuned into your work.
“Ooo what’s this… What did you make here on the stove?”
“Risotto– it’s Italian~ has lots of veggies and good stuff in it,” you didn’t stop your typing pace, engrossed too heavily in getting an email out before you forget about it and Gmail has to ‘nudge’ you, again, “-gave it a Japanese spin with what I had in the house.”
“Oh wow– oh my gosh, honey– this is so good!”
You look up since your darling man has just appeared in your doorway, sparkly eyed to see you, but equally sated by what’s just graced his mouth. It was a meal you could babysit between taking a quick shower, getting ready for work, letting its flavors marry in the fridge throughout the day, and popping back on the stove that night.
“I’m glad, happy you like it~”
“D’you eat?” Izuku asks, midbite.
“Mhm. Little bit ago,” You motion to your bowl- but when he comes alongside you, he tuts over noting it's only half empty.
“You didn't finish- you feelin’ ok?”
Having circled back onto your screen, you double take again, this time caught by his perception check over you and feeling guilty. 
“Oh. Guess I didn't. I’ll nuke it up here in a bit.”
Izuku, setting down his bowl and starting the -normally alluring- task of rolling up his shirt sleeves to his forearms, comes to your side. However since you’re paying little mind to your peripherals, you missed the show the was making of it. A simple ask of ‘what’re you working on’ came from him, sounding no different than if he wasn't trying to make eyes at you; fact was, you just weren't paying attention.
“Just some stuff for the interns,” the sight of how many tabs are open on your split screen -and in your mind- make you sigh, “With this new role, I kinda feel like you some days. Lesson plans, processing their paperwork; it’s all the stuff you had to turn in as an intern– only now I'm the one dealing with it on the backend.”
Izuku sifted around though your training materials and your propped tablet making itself useful as a second screen. At your handwritten to-do list that’s one of the only things non-digitized nowadays, he makes an offhand comment that your handwriting is nice. It's the kind of cute, ‘blink-and-you’d-miss-it’ things he says that you just hum to, whether you were really listening or not.  
When you glance up to him again, you see he’s watching you with a caring gaze and feel caught.
 “What’re you looking at?” you tease, typing again to break the silence.
“A pretty girl…” Izuku teased lightly, “who doesn’t know when to take a break.”
You type away at his call out– the need for a night off at Izuku’s side is exactly why you've been working so hard at this. You figured you'd get some of this extra prep work under control now, so by the time he rolls around on Wednesday for your standing date n–
You freeze. 
Realizing what day it is in your planner.  It's Wednesday. For dinner.
“Oh my God- -you’re here.”
“Mhmmm~” Izuku really doesn't want to laugh, but his sucking in of a lip isn't hiding it well. 
“ohmygod imtheworst!!” you refresh your face in both hands, talking through the gaps.
“You are not!” Izuku chuckled, setting your notes down. “You just got busy with all the new tasks, because you’re just that good.” 
A faithful, scarred hand comes over to smooth over your back, pulling you over into a little half hug. You sink against him, relishing in his little forehead kiss. He can try all he likes to cure your embarrassment, but you look to him apologetically.
“I’ve never forgotten our dinner dates, ‘Zuku…”
Your darling shrugged unbothered, “Had to happen sometime. It’s no big deal.”
“Is to me,” you pressed- very much bothered.
“Honey,” Izuku chips your chin up, “You’re too hard on yourself. It’s ok, these things happen! I mean, you still made a delicious dinner; even if it was a bit of an oversight I would -in fact- be eating it.”
The pang of guilt hits you at forgetting. This was just a symptomatic sign that the brilliance of your taking on the additional role of Education Coordinator at the agency was perhaps an over-zealous one. Not only to be on-call for your base job as a linguistics quirk specialist, but to balance another full time role on the office hours end? Why did you convince Fatgum this was a good idea? It sounded like a stellar idea back at the beginning of the summer…
Now you’re forgetting not just who you’re supposed to be eating with- but also eating in general.
“I’m glad you did,” you boost Izuku’s elephant-like memory, “It feels so normal to have you here, it's not like I completely forgot I’d see you today. I just– maybe I… thought I was gonna take some to you, since I wouldn't see you till later in the week? I dunno.”
“C’mere- never got a real hug.” 
You rise at his hand’s insistence, and stretch up into his full, healing embrace. 
“Hi baby,” you cooed pitifully.
“Hi, my angel. Missed you today.”
You hummed at the affection, sinking into his neck more out of your residual misery.
Izuku simply took advantage of you being close to sway you in his wide stance- a dance, sans music.
“I appreciate you cooking so much for us,” he spoke gently from his perch over your shoulder, “I was looking forward to it all day, y’know? You’re always so thoughtful with everything you make.”
He’s pressing into you with compliments- against your hard wiring to accept…
“‘Zuku.”
“It’s true~ you’re generous! You remember what my favorites are, and leave out the stuff I don’t like; you even send me leftovers. And you make snacks and treats for when the midnight munchies strike– what can’t you do?”
“Zuku…”
“And you–” he runs a hand through your hair as he sways your shy self back and forth, “-- make for the most funny, beautiful, fascinating, most inspiring company I could ever hope to share a meal with.”
Head thunking onto his shoulder, you playfully land a closed fist on his chest with a muffled, whiny plea for him to stop.
He sighs, all in good humor.
“This streak of yours... I really have my work cut out for me, don’t I? Still can’t imagine how bad it must be in that brilliant mind that my incredible girlfriend has such a hard time accepting the tiniest compliment. Maybe it’s all that late night American comedy you watch...”
You exhale then fix him with your coolest look of sarcasm, anything to show that you have a modicum of having your shit together. So you cope with humor- who doesn't?
–shame that it looks too much like a pout and makes you decidedly not threatening at all, because Izuku just beams brightly at you in response.
“Oh! Now there’s my melty princess- I was wondering where she went.”
And at that, the aloofness was gone, and you snort into a laugh and hug him tighter around the neck. He even scoops you up and gives you one little twirl for good measure. 
When he set you down, Izuku cups your face in his hands and gifts you a few more forehead kisses before demanding your sights. 
“Now. We need to get you to finish eating first. Then, what can I do to help you tonight, hm? How can I make things easier for you?”
With a softer eye to your desk’s work, you sat back down staying connected to your ever doting Izuku by way of your hand in his. You tried again to focus back. You're newly refreshed by his affections and attempt for a more positive outlook, 
“Well, my goal of doing this tonight was so that I didn’t have to go in early tomorrow. Course, if I do run myself ragged tonight, I won't be any good to anyone there– or for you, here. But I think if I pare it down to just getting these e-sigs ready and getting their time-in checklists set up for their work study onboarding, that would give me a good enough start, and I can fill in the rest of their packets tomorrow. But that means I’d need -ugh- maybe… another hour of work tonight?” you looked to him for his approval, “I have a template, so it shouldn’t take me forever.”
“Alright! You’re the boss,” Izuku supported your plan with a smile, “How about I take care of the kitchen for you while you finish up?”
“You do not have to clean my kitchen!” you spouted back, offended– causing a laugh to burst from him, “It’s not funny! I didn’t ask you to come over after a day of work yourself to just slave away at my mess.”
Izuku fixed you a look, as if you knew better. 
“I think I can tidy up a kitchen, no matter how busy of a day I’ve had. Yours isn't even over yet- so when precisely were you going to have the energy to hammer at it? You’ll enjoy not having that mountain waiting for you.”
You huffed, but smiled gratefully all the same. 
“Besides, it’s just me- doing something nice for the woman I love; and I happen to like doing nice things for you. You deserve a clean space, hun.” 
He cleared off your previous bowl to reheat along with your empty water cup. Shaking the hollow straw inside to where it clinks, he knows exactly what you need and tells you so.
“You are getting a screenless break first, though. Something tells me you didn’t the first time around~”
Settled with a fist propping up your face, you swooned over this darling man. 
Trusting Autosave to have done its job, you shut the laptop down blindly, “Sure didn’t~” 
Izuku just rolled his eyes and stepped out of the study. 
You neaten up the collated stack of applications laid out by you and stepped over to the couch, taking a kneeling perch on the end while you sought out a new record for the player on the side table. Setting one on, it was able to fire up and fill some new life into the room with a movie score you haven’t listened to in a while. Everything just sounds better on vinyl.
When Izuku came back in the room, he’d found his houseshoes and returned with renewed interest to your music choice- and with a pleased expression seeing you actually lounging and taking things easier than how he found you. He traded your reheated meal in exchange for your blue-light glasses, which he’d then clean with a pocket square and set back on your desk once they were smudgeless.
“Now, that’s a better sight~ here you go, all set for later.”
You enjoyed Izuku’s company while finishing dinner, listening to him outline his workday while he cradled your legs in his lap. He'd had a pleasantly eventful one, with plenty to say about it. You’d play ‘two truths and a lie’ sometimes when he didn’t want to bore you with a particularly mind-numbing schedule, which pleased you just as well. You excelled at it, while he gave away his fictions every time- a terrible liar for the game, but great for a faithful partner, you reasoned.  You truly loved hearing him talk and talk, your love only growing at the domesticity of this feeling and never wanting that to change. 
Once you were done, you were honestly content to hear him continue his tangent, but it seems his inner discipline was stronger than yours. 
“Alright, now to attack that sink~”
You bemoaned again for his sake. But since you made such a small, affected noise, Izuku paused mid-rise, and sat back down a bit closer to you. He stretched an arm over the back of the couch, encouraging you to come closer and met you for a sweet kiss in the middle.
His mere presence reverted you to a younger self sometimes– one desperate for his attention, good or bad. It wasn't the loveliest impulse, but he clearly thinks it's all part of your charm seeing as he gives in every time, anyway.
“Thing is,” Izuku spoke softly while adoring the hand now placed in his, “If things keep going the way I think they’re going -the way I hope they’re going- it’s.. not hard to imagine that there’s gonna be both our dishes to clean up all the time. In our kitchen, in our home someday. So this is just practice, right? Seems perfectly normal to me. How it should be.”
That idea bloomed in your chest, the thought of sharing a home with him- where this exchange of chores and time together could be your new normal. Only it would be a future where he didn’t have to leave at the end of the night and go back to a bed with compact, collegiate-designed storage at the campus accommodations he stays in on the instructor's wing. He’s got enough to get him by, but he noticeably prefers your home here closer to downtown.
“And what happens when we both wanna ditch the dishes?” you countered sweetly.
Izuku smirked, “That’s what a dishwasher is for. Another thing we’d own together…”
“Forward thinking, there.” You relished that idea. 
Izuku nuzzled your forehead thoughtfully. 
“You’ve been doing things on your own for a long time– and it shows, sweetheart.”
His words came carefully, from a tender place spoken in confidence between you, referring to when you’ve spent other late nights like this one fueled with hot tea and a desire to keep ignoring the clock.
“And I know you’ve been used to that since you’ve been traveling so much, not even having roommates to help keep you company or lighten the load. I keep wishing I could have known you sooner, had more time with you before you had to learn some of those things the hard way… but I’m happy I get the chance to, now. I’m here now, and you’re not alone, so I hope you’ll let me take care of you when I can.”
With another happy sigh forcing your eyes shut, the mental will it took to not let the tears of a perpetual eldest daughter leave you was intense.
Izuku Midoriya never failed to hit the nail on the head when it came to pep talks; he does the same with his students. But why his ones aimed at you had to have a Full Cowling dash of heartfelt anecdotes in it, you don't know. But you're grateful. You're so grateful for him. 
“If you don’t quit talkin’ like that, Izuku, I will never let you leave this condo.”
He chuckled again, lifting your cheek for another kiss, “Twist my arm, love.”
Ultimately, he rose to quit distracting you, but not without you watching him leave with a hunger you’d never felt for another soul before. 
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novy2sirius · 1 day
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celtic astrology signs
· note: i don’t know much about this type of astrology. this is information i got from this site. i just enjoy posting about all the different forms
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birch: december 24th - january 20th
motivated, ambitious, driven, passionate
rowan: january 21st - february 17th
progressive thinker, creative, original, visionaries
ash: february 18th - march 17th
free-thinker, naturally creative, powerful imagination, intuitive, spontaneous
alder: march 18th - april 14th
discoverer, pioneer, novator
willow: april 15th - may 12th
creative, intuitive, intelligent, learner, star
hawthorn: may 13th - june 9th
curious, calm, compassionate
oak: june 10th - july 7th
justice-seeking, confident, positive
holly: july 8th - august 4th
noble, leader, successful, brave
hazel: august 5th - september 1st
highly knowledgeable, knowledge thirsty
vine: september 2nd - september 29th
adaptive, unpredictable, strong-spirited
ivy: september 30th - october 27th
charismatic, restless, optimistic, team player
reed: october 28th - november 24th
willpower, history-lover, good learner
elder: november 25th - december 25th
free-spirited, risk-taker, opinionated, resilient
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hadia2211 · 2 days
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🆘Don't skip,, please help my family you could save our life!!🆘 🍉 🇵🇸
Hello‏ name is Hadia Saud. I lost husband, Momen Akl, the world champion in bodybuilding
‏We lived a happy life, we had a house and we had a gym. My husband participated in international tournaments in Lebanon, China, Algeria and other countries and won multiple medals, but since October 7, our club has been boombed.
Then my husband was killed by air strike and after that my mother too, who worked in an institution serving people with special needs, was martyred. My father, who was a tailor, was arrested, my brothers were martyred, and now I take care of my younger brothers"Talaat (15 years old), Khalil (14 years old), Retaj (10 years old), Subhi (9 years old), Tayseer (6 years old) who lost his eye, and Zahra (5 years old) "who never stops suffering from psychological distress and bedwetting.
‏We are now in northern Gaza suffering from security in food, drink, clothing and medicine
‏We are threatened with death every minute, whether from constant bombing or malnutrition
‏Since October 7, we have been displaced more than several times after being bombed. Our house was completely destroyed, and we are now in a school for displaced people. We do not suffer from contagious skin diseases due to the lack of clean water and the lack of safe drinking water. There is no place for us in these crowded and displaced places, and there is no support for us and my brothers in the north.
‏Gaza is suffering
‏Every day I face a difficult life. I try to remain the support in everything to my brothers, father and mother, and everything in this life. I try to secure some food at least half the morning every day for my brothers, and my battle is planning to obtain clean drinking water if it exists, and here it is on the cusp of normal winter. How can I do this? Let's get clothes and a cover to protect us from the extreme cold
‏I struggle daily to survive and live a humble life in the face of this life... I turn to this request and ask for help for the sake of my family and in order to meet our needs.
‏Every day I think and cry about how I will secure food, drink and all the basic necessities of life for the next day, even if it exhausts me and makes me walk for a long time. I could not bear this fear and anxiety because it had become a nightmare for me and I had no time to figure out how to get food and drink. All this, I think, I see. My brothers and sisters are crying from hunger and the loss of all basic necessities of life
‏These donations will be used for food, drink, and clothing, and the need for an alternative source of electricity due to the injury and loss of one of my younger brothers in his eye, and the children’s fear at night due to power outages.
‏I endured this life like no one else could. I struggle with life, days, and my soul to be this steadfast for the sake of my brothers
‏I ask you to kindly support me so that I can get rid of this fear that is sweeping through my mind and thinking because at that time it is one of the causes of malnutrition and malnutrition.
‏We thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your generosity and support. Your help is invisible to our motives for a while, giving hope and happiness to me and my brothers and enduring difficulties until this trust is over
🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘
each (55 sek =5$)
100$ = 1100kroner
‏will make a difference🙏🍉 be the one who helps us
Evrey donation can make a real difference and give us hope until this war ends.
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saurongorthaur9 · 3 days
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The funny thing is, even if a kiss happens between Hal and Gal, the antis will say that “it's not romantic”, “they're not in love”, “it doesn't mean anything”, “it's manipulation” and blah blah blah
I have noticed some recent conflict in the fandom over what exactly Sauron feels for Galadriel, and I don't want to insert myself into any of that. That being said, I do agree that what Sauron feels for Gal is complicated. I think there is love and there is obsession and probably other things that can't be boiled down nice and neatly into any one emotion.
With that preface, Tolkien actually talks about how Sauron's underlying driving motive is love. Love of order. Love of beauty. Love of perfection. He even says that in the beginning, these things were Sauron's virtue. Morgoth was a being driven by a nihilistic hatred for all things that he could not control and corrupt, but Sauron was driven by passionate love for Middle-earth and the things therein, and this was actually the core difference between them.
Of course, though we know that Sauron's love (as Mairon) started out as something good, it was quickly twisted into obsession to control what he loved. And eventually, when he was not allowed to control it, it twisted into hatred just as passionate as his love had been.
I love that we're actually getting a microcosm of that with Sauron and Galadriel, and I think how Sauron feels about Galadriel is very Tolkienian, given the above passages from "Morgoth's Ring" that I referenced. I think at the beginning, Sauron-as-Halbrand's love for Galadriel was actually pretty genuine and as pure as it could be for a being like him. He connected with her (genuinely, I believe), he admired her, he found her beautiful, and he saw a kindred spirit within her. And I think those were all pretty wholesome feelings.
However, we've already seen those feelings begin to warp into obsession to possess and control. We saw it even by the end of Season 1, when we saw how manipulative and angry he got when Gal rejected his marriage/partnership proposal. We're definitely seeing it in Season 2 with his creepy, possessive behavior towards Mirdania in the last episode.
I think over the course of the series, we'll see Sauron's love become a darker and darker thing, more and more obsessive, more possessive than a genuine connection: mirroring how his love for Middle-earth fell into something dark and twisted. By the very end of the series, I could even see Sauron coming to hate Galadriel - much as he comes to hate Middle-earth - because he can't possess or control her, but I think it will still be an obsessive hatred that is, in part, a love gone terribly wrong.
All this is to say, I think the best characters are complex characters. Is Sauron in love? Yes, I think he is. Is he also manipulating Gal? Yes, I think he is. Is his love something dark and controlling and possessive? Yes, I think it is. These are all things that can co-exist. The one thing that I do vehemently disagree with is that "it doesn't mean anything" or that Sauron and Galadriel's connection doesn't mean anything to Sauron. I think it means everything to Sauron. And if there is a kiss, I think it will be an extension of that. At least, I would hope so.
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petr1kov · 2 days
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i swear most berserk fans are the dumbest motherfuckers alive in general but especially so when it comes to analyzing griffith's character and motivations. everything that happened in the eclipse is usually just tied into a neat uncomplicated bow of 'griffith always was a sociopath with no feelings and everyone in the band of the hawk were always seen as disposable tools to him', which is such a poor reading of literally everything that happened prior to it that it drives me insane.
the eclipse is meant to be a huge sacrifice. it is a grotesque and violent ritual that has griffith completely shedding his humanity and becoming something monstrous by cutting ties with everything and everyone that made him feel human in the worst possible way. what would be the point of it if griffith was already a fully-fledged monster from the beginning? why did griffith even need to experience visions to be convinced if he was always ready to sell his comrades for a corn chip?
even the scene where he explicitly states that 'only [guts] made me forget about my dream' often gets misconstrued as being just another expression of his narcissist ego, with claims that griffith became inconsolable and reckless after guts left him only because he got mad that lost control of his 'tool', since he felt like he needed him to achieve what he wanted. obviously, griffith's egotistical nature is central to his character and plays a part in this as well, but it's still very clear that it's not just resentment that motivates him in the aftermath of guts leaving. as he stated, guts made him forget what he wanted to achieve at all, HIS DREAM, for a while - and when he thinks of that, he remembers the good times they shared, not the bad. he simply couldn't envision a future that didn't include guts, after a point in his life, and that feeling had nothing to do with any pragmatic assessment of the pros and cons of having a powerful fighter like him on his side, and he knew that. it was the depth of his attachment to guts that terrified him.
i feel that people tend to dance around the issue of griffith's emotions in general because they feel that acknowledging that he felt anything other than possessive entitlement to the members of his crew (or even just to guts) is almost the same as excusing his actions, but it's the opposite for me. believing that griffith was simply born incapable of feeling love and affection for anyone is as good as believing that he essentially had no true free will in the events that led to the eclipse; if they were all interchangeable pawns on his hand, how would he ever hesitate to sacrifice them when the time came? how could a sacrifice like this even hold any meaning, really? believing that is fully conceding that he was always destined to become femto no matter what, which runs counter to the theme of free will in the face of causality that drives the series. where is the tragedy in that? where is the betrayal? it hurts because it could, should have been different, and griffith made a terrible choice - but only because he had a choice to make in the first place.
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evilsoup · 9 hours
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look, it's pretty straightforward: terfs hate men, and see trans women as men; they also have some additional hatred for trans women because they see them as men who are trying to infiltrate women's spaces. This pathway to transphobia is what makes them different from e.g. religiously-motivated transphobes, or the whole "anti gender ideology" far right who see feminism + gay rights + trans rights + immigration as part of a conspiracy by (((elites))) to undermine the white race. Terfs are worth remarking on because they are a "left" path to transphobia rather than a right-wing path, and their ideology (grounded in patriarchy theory, the analysis that men constitute a ruling class over women, or possibly a colonial power) has some currency in even the trans-inclusive left.
I don't really understand the utility of denying this very obvious fact. I guess some people want to keep around a (stupid) politics based on seeing cis men as uniformly an enemy. But like you don't need to do that at all lol, and it's probably impossible to construct a consistently trans-inclusive politics on the basis of patriarchy theory.
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"The Last Temptation": One Megathread to Rule Them All - Clues and Speculation, PART 1
By now everyone in the “Rings of Power” fandom is aware of “The Last Temptation” - Galadriel and Sauron scene in the finale (2x08) - so I’ll save myself the trouble of further explaining it, because we have more interesting things to talk about.
What happens in this scene? What is the season building towards? And what are clues, foreshadowing or red herrings the episodes have given us so far?
It's pretty much confirmed that Sauron will pitch the “be my queen” question to Galadriel, again. I usually don’t pay much attention to the actors’ interviews because they’ll say anything to avoid spoiling the story and spill the beans, but sometimes it’s important for context.
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From Episode 7 preview, we know that Galadriel will arrive at Eregion and share a heartfelt moment with Celebrimbor (I'll come back to this scene later on). However, the showrunners have teased that 2x07 is an Elrond-centered episode, and I don’t think Sauron and Galadriel will reunite before the finale (2x08) because that’s one of the climaxes of the season. Anyway, my guess is that Sauron has already left Eregion once Galadriel arrives.
1) Will Galadriel resist or succumb to Sauron’s temptation? 
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You cannot face him alone.
To me, this scene with Gil-galad is the most important one, when foreshadowing is concerned. Mainly because our High King of the Noldor got it right last season, so we better pay attention to what he says.  
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We foresaw that if Galadriel’s search should have continued, she might have inadvertently kept alive the very evil she sought to defeat. For the same wind that seeks to blow out a fire may also cause its spread.
Gil-galad tells Elrond the true reason why he sent Galadriel back to Valinor (1x01) 
Oh, boy, and how right he was! 
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But Gil-galad isn’t the only character who warns Galadriel she can’t face Sauron alone because she might not be able to resist him: 
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Similar to Gi-galad, Elrond shares the same concern.
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And why would he think that?
In 2x06, it’s Adar who warns Galadriel she might succumb to Sauron as well, because she’s acting quite smug at being able to resist him once before (1x08). 
I resisted.
For a while, perhaps.
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His eye bores a hole and the rest of him slithers in.
So far, this season, we have three different characters warning Galadriel that she might succumb to Sauron if she faces him alone at the finale. Unsure if Celebrimbor will tell her the same thing in 2x07, but three characters saying the same thing is far from a red herring, at this point.
2) And so, the main question now is: will Galadriel face Sauron alone, out of her own volition? Or does Sauron chase after her to isolate her from the rest?  
We already know that Galadriel is consumed by the idea of finding Sauron, and to destroy him; but now, she’s motivated not only by her brother’s death at the hands of his werewolves, but due to her belief that everything she experienced with Halbrand (and the connection they had: friendship, romantic, ambiguous) was a lie and part of Sauron’s schemes of deception. 
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However, in this scene in particular (2x02), Galadriel is feeling especially vulnerable, and eventually agrees with both Elrond and Gil-Galad, that she can’t face Sauron alone because she’s unaware of what might happen if she lets him in, again (meaning, she might actually succumb to him). 
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However, from 2x02 until 2x06, Galadriel grows bolder and more confident, mostly aided by Nenya and the visions and the guidance the ring of power provides her with. Although, I would argue it was never her intention to face Sauron alongside Elrond and the others, and this scene was a moment of weakness (or the red herring itself).
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I swear to you, High King. I will not stop until he is destroyed and I have put this right.  
Morfydd Clark herself has said that Galadriel knows she messed up really bad, and is on a desperate mission for redemption. However, last season she was also desperate in finding Sauron and destroy him, and that worked wonders, didn’t it? 
Based on this, I would say Galadriel will seek out Sauron all by herself in the finale. We already saw Galadriel and Adar paralleling each other in their pursuit for Sauron, and how consumed and obsessed both of them are by it. While Adar is sacrificing his “children” to destroy Sauron, Galadriel thrown Elrond under the bus (by telling Adar he’s the one who carries Nenya) just to get a chance of finding Sauron and face him herself. 
Galadriel’s pride is her main flaw of character, and usually what gets her into trouble (in both RoP and the books, with her only letting go of her pride on the Third Age when Frodo offers her the One Ring and she declines). And in this case, her pride will be her downfall. She believes she'll always resist Sauron, because what he offered her last time (power) wasn’t enough to tempt her.   
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My guess is that Galadriel will lure Sauron out either by using Morgoth’s iron crown or Nenya, but my money is on the first option (as we saw on the trailers).
3) Elrond’s Choice
Before we get into the rabbit hole that is Sauron’s plan concerning Galadriel, we have to talk about Elrond’s promise in 2x04:
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This scene might be a red herring or foreshadowing, but I’m inclined to believe the later. And it can either happen in either 2x07 or in 2x08 (during the “Last Temptation” scene).  
Since 2x07 is an Elrond-centered episode I would argue it would make more sense for this choice to happen in this episode. In the preview, we saw Elrond and Adar having a conversation in the same tent he dined with Galadriel and proposed an alliance to her (that didn’t work out, did it?). Adar knows Elrond carries Nenya, but he has other interests in dealing with the Elves, too. 
He expressed to Galadriel his desire in knowing what comes after Sauron is defeated and the fate of the Orcs, seeking out a truce between Elves and Orcs, which would allow him and his “children” to live in peace in Mordor. I believe he will propose this to Elrond, too. In exchange, Adar might want to use Galadriel to lure Sauron out.
And so, in 2x07 Elrond might have to choose between saving Galadriel or stopping Sauron.
But now you are wondering: if Elrond allows Galadriel to remain Adar’s prisoner and she’s at Eregion in the same episode, this theory doesn’t make any sense? How did she escaped? Well, that’s a question for another time, but another character might set her free (one who would make the show more complex and give Galadriel some character’s growth and development).
4) Galadriel’s Sacrifice  
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She sacrificed herself to save us all.
No, you are mistaken, Camnir. She did not do it to save us. She did it to save the ring.
These quotes are from 2x04, when Galadriel faces the Orcs by herself and eventually gets captured by Adar. However, it’s the second time in this episode there is a mention of Galadriel either sacrificing herself, or something.
This can be foreshadowing for several things: 
Celebrimbor’s death (since she says this after Elrond talks about how his father once prophesized Celebrimbor’s life would one day be on his hands); 
Galadriel goes to fight Sauron alone (it can be an extra layer of foreshadowing to this happening); 
Galadriel sacrificing herself to save Middle-earth (meaning she goes/joins Sauron at the end). 
5) Sauron’s plan concerning Galadriel 
Sauron is in Eregion in the middle of his “Rings of Power” masterplan. However, and through his interactions with Mirdania, Galadriel’s Doppelgänger, it’s clear she’s still very much on his mind, and is a part of his plans of domination.
The plan is simple: Sauron wants Galadriel as his queen, still. 
But why? Galadriel is not yet the powerful "elf-witch" she'll become in the future.He can see her potential, sure, but would that be enough to explain his obsession? There is a lot of meta already about the parallels between Morgoth/Silmarils and Sauron/Galadriel, so I won’t get into that here.
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How strange. When the light... caught your hair... for amoment, you seemed her perfect likeness. 
Whose likeness? 
Why, Lady Galadriel, of course. 
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There is a lot of discourse going on in the “Rings of Power” fandom concerning Sauron’s true feelings for Galadriel: obsession, love or something else because he, being an immortal spirit, is uncapable of “human-like” feelings.  
The answer is easy: both obsession and love are correct. The ones arguing Sauron is not capable of love are wrong. According to the lore, Maiar can fall in love, and one Maia did fall in love with an Elf (and these characters happen to be Elrond’s ancestors). Mairon is capable of love. But he’s a fallen Maia, corrupted by Morgoth, and, so, his love is also corrupted into possessiveness, obsession, jealousy, unsatisfiable lust, emotional turmoil, pain and suffering.  
I would even argue that Sauron fell in love with Galadriel while he was on his somewhat “repentant era”, and it started out as something purer, but it’s twisting into something darker as he goes deeper and deeper into evil, until it turns into hatred, later on.
In 2x06, and in order to manipulate Celebrimbor into finishing the Nine rings of power and prevent him from finding out Eregion is under attack, Sauron conjures a vision of “Everything is well on Eregion”. However, after Celebrimbor leaves, he’s left alone in his own vision (delusions) and his thoughts dwell on Galadriel.  
How do we know this? We have several characters randomly mentioning “it’s a horse! A horse! It’s a horse!”. When I first watch this scene I was a bit taken back. But nothing is random, folks:
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And then we have Sauron the Poet:  
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All of these clues are meant to show us, the audience, that Galadriel is still on Sauron’s mind. And that he harbors some quite strong feelings for her. And this will come into play in “The Last Temptation” scene, like the director of the finale, Charlotte Brändströmm teased on “X-Ray Vision” podcast: 
I think Sauron even really loves Galadriel and you see that at the very end. 
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ixiot-ghostrebel · 2 days
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Rebel please hear me out! Kratos! Reader w/ a twist!
This is an AU I’ve been dreaming of for like a week now. Btw ‘Kratos’ is a nickname Teyvat’s citizens gave the reader, not their actual birth name
Centuries ago, before the Great Archon War was a massacre like no other. All your beloved Archons of today had radically different personalities. Most of them took their divine roles for granted by succumbing to sin. Until one day: The mortals rebelled. They were fed up, but not quite like one bitter soul was.
A being made of flesh with gold flowing through their veins was born. The half blood was the embodiment of humanity’s wrath. They led mankind to war with the Gods. Nearly 2/3 of deities were slaughtered within a year. This was the year the Gods were humbled…..
In the end, Kratos was tragically slain by the hands of their own heavenly parent. That massacre was a painful lesson that present day Archons still follow: Devotion is something that is earned. For someone to be devoted to you, they must have respect and faith that you will lead them in the right direction. Do not abuse the faith others bestow upon you.
To this very day, humans still praise their name. They erected statues in their likeness. Kratos is viewed as a champion of mankind by the mortals, a bittersweet reminder of a shameful period in time for certain for the divine……So get this. In an ironic twist of fate, centuries later, a baby was placed at the doorstep of a cathedral one late night. A baby who was born with very familiar tattoo-like markings on their body.
An Archon, who was spared by that same tortured soul, was now cradling the tiny babbling creature. “Oh. My. Heavens. H-how!? Do you remember me, Little One? I am deeply regretful for the suffering we caused. Please, can we start anew? A fresh beginning for all of us.”
Sincerely, 🌩️ Anon
🌩️ ANON IM SO SORRY I DIED ON YOU 😭😭😭😭😭😭
But holy cow this is a good narrative. I 100% love this! Definitely gets the brain juices going for sure 👀👀👀👀
Kratos being a mortal ascending to the powers of divinity solely because of their bitter nature and revenge-esque methods is definitely interesting! I might write something (no promises) if I find the motivation in myself :D
Venti having PTSD fr tho—somebody get him a therapist 😔
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utilitycaster · 3 days
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Do you think the god debate and narrative around it in C3 would be more compelling if Ludinus only focused on killing the Betrayer Gods a la Cassida? As many pointed out, the impact that Primes have on mortals is largely positive. Aside from cool abilities, they give healing, meaning and comfort to their followers. Up until very recently (Braius) we haven't seen Betrayers do much of that and their followers are, more often than not, people who would cause great harm to others.
I actually do not. There's multiple questions in here, and honestly I could probably write 5000 words on any of them, which I'm not going to do, but I will split this up into components.
First: I don't think Ludinus is the problem at all. He is unambiguously the villain, but he is always narratively compelling. It is fun to make fun of him because he is genuinely a fantastically crafted villain. When I dunk on villains who are boring, it's nowhere near as fun because all you can say is "wow what do you even do. boring-ass" whereas Ludinus is full of interesting possibilities and hooks to be like how can you be so smart and have lived for so long and seen so much and come to the fucking worst conclusions. There's a reason why people have been side-eyeing him consistently since at least his first speaking appearance in Campaign 2, if not his first appearance ever, in Felderwin, and it's because he's a great character who I hope dies horribly. So his motivations are fine. I'm not saying the possibility you suggest wouldn't be a very interesting different story, but my complaints about narrative and the gods debate do not require anything different from Ludinus, who has been a consistent bright spot within the muddied narrative by being a consistent blot on Exandria and also sometimes the moon.
The narrative and the god debate are intertwined - the issue is a dull indecision that plagues both of them - so I'm splitting this one up a little differently.
What do I as a viewer think is the most reasonable stance regarding the gods based on my understanding of the worldbuilding of Exandria?
What is interesting to watch?
And therein lies the problem. I, as a viewer, think that killing the gods is a bad idea, and I've articulated this in various spaces and am not going to write another 5000 words about it right now, but between the events of past campaigns; the events of this campaign including Downfall; who within the narrative supports the choice to not kill the gods; and the complete uncertainty regarding the fate of existence let alone mortaldom should they be killed or chased away I have come to this position. Any counter-argument tends to rely either on entirely false statements, or a nebulous "a better world is possible" without any assurances that the allegedly better world is, in fact, probable. Ironically enough, I am not willing to take a leap of faith.
But as for what's interesting to watch? That's an entirely different story. My issue with the the gods debates is that they are endless, circular, indecisive, and between the least informed group of PCs we've had by a large margin. They say the same 5 sentences in different words over and over. It's like watching a bunch of high people while you're sober. It only hits hard if you're stupid. For more on this see here and here. If Bells Hells had decided 30 or 40 episodes ago to side with Ludinus, or to try to only kill the Betrayers, or to oppose Ludinus but kill the gods? Great. Fantastic. I'm not saying I wouldn't have had my critiques of it given the worldbuilding setup as described above, but I think it would have held up infinitely better as a standalone story, at least, than it does now. My problem is that instead they had endless circular indecisive conversations during a bunch of (comparatively much more interesting) fetch quests, finally came to some kind of conclusion that gave the end game some structure and direction like 4 episodes ago, and then had yet another wrench thrown at them. And convention panels and Cooldown have consistently confirmed my suspicions about the lack of planning in the places where this campaign really needed it. In my conversations after the latest episode, multiple people independently used the term "sludge" to describe their feelings about the plot.
In actual play, I want characters who have clear conviction and make bold and decisive moves because handwringing forever in such a slow-moving medium is excruciatingly boring. Like, do I think Percy in the Briarwoods arc is making good, informed decisions that make him a moral person? Absolutely the fuck not. Do I think the story where he's shooting first and asking questions later is infinitely superior to one where Vox Machina can't decide what to do for 50 episodes? Yeah.
The god debates are ultimately a symptom of this narrative aimlessness. The lack of an answer is the problem, not what the answer is.
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lazyjellyfish300 · 1 day
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just a man
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Synopsis: on the night of Shibuya, Kusakabe wrestles with his obligation to aid his fellow sorcerers and risk his life. Normally the pretty bartender that he and Kento both like to share after hours, he decides to visit you alone before he does. Spinoff of a drabble I made.
Words: 6.1k 🖤
CW: MINORS DNI, XFEM!READER, SMUT(P IN V, SEMI PUBLIC PDA (ELEVATOR) FINGERING, CUM EATING, DOGGY STYLE, BREAST & NIPPLE PLAY, SPANK, ROUGH SEX, ORAL F RECEIVING) DANGER, LITTLE ANGST, CANON DIVERGENCE, MIGHT BE SPOILERS
A/n: yes, this is a repost. Since the original failed to show in the tags. Trying to see if this will get more interaction. Thank you for reading if this is your first time 🫶🏽 and my deepest most gracious thank you to those who did already read and reblog and comment.
@1-900-venusluvs @thatone-writer
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The dampened streets of Shinjuku are far from asleep despite the nighttime wandering into the darkened hours past midnight.
A chill laced with something ominous in the late petrichor-ridden air of October delivered a rush of restlessness throughout Atsuya Kusakabe's body as he stared into the night, the illuminating residual of neon signs painting a a rosy halo around his form.
His darkened eyes solemnly scan the crowds of young passerbys donning their eclectic outfits in light of the Halloween holiday, joyfully ignorant to the heavy knowledge he possessed of a greater storm that was brewing in the district of Tokyo just south of where he stood.
He got the call, he just didn't want to go. Truthfully, why was he needed when other first grade sorcerers such as the likes of Kento Nanami were already there?
There was something different about tonight's mission. He could feel it. He spent his whole life running from things that seemed so big and insurmountable. Yet he chose a life that regularly brushed elbows with danger.
The modern pressures of life can cause one to make choices uncharacteristic of them in the name of survival.
He was being selfish, but was wanting to stay alive really a selfish thing to want? Or was it a wise and sensible thing to hope for?
Jujutsu Sorcery didn't need to be this big dramatic display of self-sacrifice all the time. Chasing nobility in hopes of carrying the outward label of martyr while you wouldn't even be alive to see it was a fool's errand in his eyes. But it clashed with the institution he committed to whose sole mission was to produce sorcerers capable of such selfless acts to serve the non-sorcerer sphere of humankind.
What kind of hypocrite would he be if he failed to show up for the battle he'd beaten every last lesson in the book of preparedness into the mind of his students?
Before he joins them, he figures he'll make one more stop.
It might be the last time after all, experiencing that divine warmth your eyes exuded that made moments feel like a lifetime. Temporary solace he sought somewhere at the bottom of a glass and between the smoky haze and sensual opulence of an upscale bar past midnight.
Pretty eyes and a mouth that dripped salvation onto his throbbing cock in between sheets that smelled like you and him, delivering him to a heaven on Earth even better than the one in the clouds, one where jujutsu didn't exist.
He just wanted to feel like a man one more time. He would walk the formidable road of danger that was expected of him, but he'd do it on his own terms and at his own leisure.
It was his life, after all. Who could blame him?
He turned and made his way down the alley of Shinjuku suited for self pleasure and indulgence, ironically in the opposite direction of the selfless weight of the noble duty that called him.
------
Kusakabe stepped inside to be greeted with the familiar atmosphere of the lavish art deco styled speakeasy where you worked. It was one of many spots in the district where upper classes came to unwind, the motivation of tonight propelled by the autumnal festivities after dark.
The air hung heavy with allure and old money swank that was brought out by worldly imbibement and blackened clouds of burning tobacco from expensive cigars, smooth jazz, clinks of glass and murmured speech, occasionally interrupted with hearty belly laughter coming from certain patrons.
Dim booths that felt mobby with men in fine linen suits, running their gold adorned fingers over the suggestive hosiery of their female companionship. Intimate secrets whispered in ears and lustful gazes over lipstick stained glass rims.
"Hey, darlin...aren't you a sight for sore eyes?"
You hear his deep, rough voice behind you. You turn gracefully, flashing the handsome acquaintance that disarming smile of yours, noticing his usual, equally handsome companion was not with him.
"Hiya, Kusa! Just you tonight?"
"Just me tonight, doll..." Rugged charm oozes out of his expression, sitting on one of the bar stools directly across from you, a masculine spice gently wafting from him as he opens his coat, stripping it off and handing it to a passing butler who bows and promptly walks away. "Hope that's alright."
"It's more than alright, handsome." You touch his arm and his heart flutters. "Be right back, okay?"
He feels a swell of pride to his ego and he smirks. "Take your time, angel, but don't keep me waiting long, ya hear?"
"I won't, Kusa." You flirtatiously pout your lips.
He looks at you fondly and sits back in his chair as he raises the fresh glass of bourbon to his lips, those oaky eyes lingering on your form as you float away into the haze of smoke and the low enchanting light of the ritzy air of tonight as he loosens his tie.
----
Hours later, he beckons you closer when it appears you have a minute to spare and the initial buzz of the night has started to burn out, having graduated to a darker corner of the bar accented by the elegant polished mahogany.
He's clearly in the mood to flirt which you can place immediately with the way he's leaning towards you and how his eyes possess a gleam of playfulness.
But, he wasn't going to be a dick about it. He turns his considerate attention towards you to inquire about your current state,
"How's your week been, sweetheart?" He asks, honey dripping from his voice.
Your lips curl upwards and he all but fails to remove his hungry gaze from the inviting way your gloss makes them look so plump.
"My week has been alright, thank you for asking, Kusa. But a little tiring if I'm honest."
"Mm? Tell me about it."
He can't help but notice you seem a little guarded, as though you were carrying it in your shoulders, keeping him at arms length. He knew from the stiff curve of your smile that you weren't letting him all the way in.
He studies you, tilting his head. "I don't bite, y'know doll..."
You shake your head, scrunching your nose in false coy as you wipe down the bar, "I know you don't, handsome...." Your eyes sharpen briefly as you focus on a stubborn spot.
"....just not used to seeing you here without Kento."
Ah, of course, Kento.
"Heh...you do have a special liking for Kento, don't ya, sweetheart?" He inquiries light-heartedly, raising his glass to his lips.
You shrug, although the shy expression and the warmth you feel in your cheeks gives you away.
"Maybe, I mean, he's very sweet. And handsome..."
Kusakabe smirks while clapping a hand against his chest in feigned offense,
"What 'bout me, doll? I'm not?"
You unseriously roll your eyes as you crack your bar rag against the polished wood before tossing it into the soiled bucket underneath.
"No! Of course you are, Kusa..." You lean in with a sunny smile, your fingers dance along his forearm before you give it a squeeze.
He feels his heart patter in his chest but he disguises it with another smirk,
"M'just giving ya a hard time, doll. I apologize..."
He takes another long sip of his drink, ice cubes leaving his thin lips wet with bourbon as he sighs.
It was no secret that women loved Kento, and you were no exception. Truth was, he was used to being compared to him, but he gave up long ago trying to fill the shoes of Kento Nanami, both in their pursuits as sorcerers and in courting women.
But, despite the sinful arrangement of sharing a pretty woman like you after hours with Kento (that he considered all good in fair fun), sometimes after the heat died down and the throes of passion became more crystal clear as you laid sandwiched between him and his comrade, he found himself falling asleep wondering what it would be like if he had you all to himself.
He eyes you pensively before he looks down, fishing out a fresh lollipop from his pocket and unwrapping it.
"I am a little rough with ya, aren't I?" He sticks the pink lemonade flavored sucker in his mouth.
You grin again, looking down as though the motion could keep the internal fluster at bay.
"I mean, I don't mind that, it's just that he's..."
"More gentle?" He asks, leaning in a little closer to you, moving the stick of the lollipop to the other side of his mouth with smooth intrigue. The soft manner of his question throws you for a loop as you gaze back at him.
There's something curious in his eyes that you haven't seen from him before.
He places his hand on top of yours.
It somehow felt more intimate despite the fact he's explored the deepest parts of you, and seen your face as he and his friend delivered you to heaven countless times before.
"I can be gentle, too, doll..."
He whispers. He notices goosebumps raise on your arm above where he's tracing broad shapes with his thumb on the back of your hand.
Your pretty lips gently part, your bottom lip catching on the tempting shine of your lip gloss.
Kusakabe groans, the heat traveling swiftly in his body and down to his pants.
He has you right where he wants you and he prays you'll stay with him tonight.
"I could show you..." He smiles. "How 'bout I take you somewhere after this, beautiful?"
He notes your slight hesitation. Somehow it felt a little more intimidating knowing it was just him this time. Keeping in mind the rough sex he preferred made you feel slightly weary, since you were used to Kento's gentle and more giving touch to balance it out.
But, here he was promising to show you a good time with just him, and if sweet and slow was what you wanted, he'd give it to you.
"Promise I'll take good care of ya, doll..." He reassures. "You'll be safe with me. We'll go at your pace and if you wanna stop, we'll stop."
You smile and can't help but feel the warmth trickling through your shoulders, the soft way he's looking at you, a man with a gruff shell gazing at you like you're an ethereal goddess sprawled from the sea whom he's cajoling from the cerulean curtains of ocean foam to meet land for the first time.
Asking you like he's only barely allowed to breathe in your presence despite bedding you several times before, and the dark, enchanting brown of his eyes only adds to the flame.
You can't say no to him.
You smile with silent confirmation, and he grins, bringing the back of your hand against his mouth,
"You're an angel, sweetheart, thank you... I'll be waiting out front for ya."
"Okay Kusa, I just need to cash out my drawer but I'll be right there!"
"Course, baby. Take your time. I'll be right outside." He gives you one more charming smile before he retrieves his coat, leaving your mind reeling above the clouds.
----
The hotel lobby is equally stuffy but it's heavy and sensual, mirroring the opulence of the speakeasy you just came from, maintaining this area of Shinjuku's reputation for catering to those donning white collars in the upper ranks of wealth.
A couple patrons sit at the bar, cigarette smoke in casual clouds dusting the high embossed gold of the marble ceilings, dull candlelight and vintage luxury on jade velvet couches, tall palm leaves in obsidian pots and dry martinis swirling against the translucent glass as they spoke in low voices.
Kusakabe has you tucked under his arm, his fingers barely ghosting the curve of your ass as his hand sits low on the soft flesh of your hip.
"You wearin that new set Kento and I bought ya, angel...?" His fingers tease along your collarbone.
Your skin prickles with goosebumps and your stomach twists with the promise of what's to come. "Yes, Kusa..."
"Good girl...gonna have to keep it on when I'm going down on ya, sweetheart..."
His husky murmurings in intimate volume only you can hear emulsifies your insides into honey as he slowly stokes the flame, getting you nice and warmed up.
"So pretty, doll. You're always so stunning."
His lips brush the shell of your ear as soon the elevator doors close. You turn to him with heavy lidded eyes and your lips crash together in a frenzy of pent up lust.
He groans into the kiss, his tongue exploring the glossy seam of your lips before you open them and he prods inside with steady, building intention and want. He explores carefully while clutching both sides of your neck tenderly, the whiskey lending itself to his movements, slightly sloppy but somehow it made things even more steamy between you as you drowned in the spicy taste of bourbon with undertones of the sweet pink lemonade sucker weaved in his mouth.
You feel his palms slide under the hem of your shirt, gently replacing it with the subtle chill from his skin sliding up your stomach until both hands come to reside on the soft mounds of your breasts, greeting them with deliberate, teasing swipes of his thumbs over your responsive nipples, leaving a column of goosebumps shooting up your spine as it arched.
Your eyes roll back at the sensual feeling of his growing cock through his pants as he softly ruts his hips against you.
You two stay locked like that for several steamy moments accentuated by the exaggerated pants into each other's mouths as you hump one another in the quiet elevator, his forehead rests against yours, jaw slack as he watches you melt underneath his hands, the epicenter of pleasure radiating from how he's groping your breasts and rubbing his hips against your ass in just the right way that it carries such irresistible preview of the fervor and passion he promised to fuck you with for real as soon as the door to your suite closed behind you.
Without warning, his hand wanders to your sex, his molten gaze remains locked on you. You whine loudly and suck in air between your teeth.
"Fuck..." He hisses as he feels his cock elongate all at once, strained under the confines of his pants. You wiggle for a moment in his grasp, trying to align the pressure of his hand with your throbbing clit. The delicious discovery of which you announce with another trembling moan.
"Kusa..." You feebly whisper, the publicity of the sexy act, dwindling time of the elevator's ascent before it reaches your floor, and the union of friction between Kusakabe's skilled hand and your clit place you in serious danger of cumming for him in your pants.
"Hold on f'me, angel..." The corner of his mouth twitches with satisfaction.
"Kusa, please..."
"I know doll...." He kisses your throat. "Just teasin ya for a bit..."
"Kusa, slow..."
"I know, doll, I remember..."
You jaw falls open as a low purr escapes your throat, the ending accentuated by a whine as his finger moves at a coaxing tempo.
"Nice...n' slow..." He whispers, his words rolling off his tongue in devastating synchronization of his movements over your clit, before two of his fingers slip beautifully inside you with a deep moan.
Just as you thought you were beginning to bloom, he withdraws his hand swiftly and stuffs it in his pocket, the movement and quick emptiness making you wobble on your feet.
He catches you with his other arm, pulling you against him as the doors slide open with a ding. An older couple nods politely as they step in, seemingly unfazed by your clearly disheveled clothes and wild eyed expression.
Kusakabe merely smirks as he guides you out of the elevator and down the hall to your awaiting room.
-----
You can't help but sigh deeply as your lips connect with Kusakabe's again.
This felt divine after a long day. He could feel his worries dissipate and dissolve into the air that began to hang heavily around you, not allowing his lips to disconnect from yours even for a second as he removed his coat, stripping yours off you with careful precision, the sensual sound of the fabric hitting the floor.
You were plunging headfirst into a sea that swallowed you whole completely, lost to the tides of lust.
As your head hits the pillow of the king sized bed, you weave your fingers in the loops of his belt to occupy your hands while he quicky moved to unbutton your shirt. You shivered as you felt the fleeting graze of his fingers against your breasts that were slowly becoming revealed to him. Your sudden movement interrupts his trance, briefly, only to remember the promise he made you earlier.
"Sorry, doll..." He murmurs, his wet lips move to the corner of your mouth as he gently circulates his hands that contain your soft breasts in them in wordless appreciation. "...this still okay?"
"Mhmm...." You weakly mewl out, all sense of your surroundings trickle down the drain when he begins fondling your tits, struggling to maintain control over the volume of your moans, "Tha-that'so good, Kusa...hard to be quiet when it feels so good..."
"Fuck em..." He groans as you arch your back. "Keep moanin for me like that, angel..."
Kusakabe closes his eyes, both your foreheads resting against one another as though he could absorb your warmth. Your little pants and whimpers egg him on as he plays with your breasts but he remains chained to his word to take things slow.
"Kusaaa...."
But that particular breathy utterance of his name that fell from your lips causes him to dip his head down, his hands guiding your bra straps down to easily move the lacey cups as he took your left breast in his mouth, his cheeks hollowing and your head gently rolling back as his tongue slowly lapped at your nipple.
Your hand flies to his bulge, massaging and feeling him up through his slacks. Another groan rumbles in his chest, the deep pitch prompting you quickly to clench your thighs. You sigh when his mouth departs your left breast, leaving the nipple perky with a wet pucker and sloppy kiss, moving to the right.
His eyes flicker up and remain trained on you every so often. Watching you slowly be reduced to putty little by little with every warm, wet brush of his tongue, bathing your breasts in worship with his wanton mouth.
You begin to grow impatient, your weeping cunt desperately begging to be full of him, the heated foreplay giving you more than enough preparation to take him, but he continues loving on you like this without pause for several heavenly minutes.
"Kusa, baby...can't take it...need your cock, Kusa..."
"Mhhnnn.....hold on, doll...I've still gotta taste ya..."
Kusakabe's fingers trail to your black skirt, greeting the plush of your stomach with a kiss. "This okay?" He checks in gently again. You nod and he slides off your skirt and pantyhose, leaving the deep emerald lace of the panties he bought for you exposed to his hungry eyes.
"God, you're something..." He whispers.
"So are you, Kusa..."
"Oh yeah?" He purrs, running a finger along the sheer fabric that only scantily hid your wetting sex away from him as he wet his lips. He unbuttons his shirt, dipping his head down before slowly inhaling your scent.
"What am I, angel?"
You feel the pad of his thumb hook underneath the gusset.
"You're...."
A moan is ripped out of your throat the minute his tongue teases the outer delicate flesh of your pussy. "Kusa..."
"Go on, baby..." He teases a kiss to the soft mound.
"You're...so good..." Your toes curl as his tongue glides between your arousal dripped folds. "Ohhhh you're so fucking sexy, Atsuya..."
"Ffffuck me doll..." He turns you on your stomach. "You can say my name like that all night long."
He removes his shirt completely, pulls your panties to the right and leans in, kissing and kneading the tender fat. One of his hands frees his aching cock.
"Atsuya....mmm, Atsuya..."
"Such a gorgeous ass..." He groans, moving the panties slightly as he frees and slides his cock between your asscheeks, loving how the globes envelope around it, the second best thing he loved seeing wrapped around his cock, besides the warm silky walls of your cunt.
"Gotta be my favorite part of you, angel..." He leans over, swirling his tongue against your shoulder blade before punctuating it with a tender kiss, blazing a long trail down your spine, provoking you to arch for him again.
Kusakabe groans at your responsiveness and bestowing him the beautiful sight of your ass in the air again. When he reaches the bottom, he gives he gives your asscheek another tender squeeze in preparation.
"Relax for me, doll..."
The hinge in your jaw slowly unravels, going slack completely as Kusakabe begins eating your pussy from the back. You feel his nose push against the slit, completely and shamelessly coating his face with your arousal. His tongue wettens the seam of your folds, exploring them like a paintbrush against a canvas. You let yourself grind on his tongue, the languid laps of him stroking your sensitive flesh making you ache for the sweet stretch of his cock, settling for the sensation of his nose brushing the sides of your clit instead. He groans and you feel the low purr reverberate against your pussy and you respond to the delectable sensation by sticking your ass even more into his face.
Somehow the fact that he was tongue fucking you while just pulling your panties to the side made it even sexier.
"Christ, babydoll..." He chuckles huskily. "You're soakin f'me..."
"Atsuya, baby..."
"Ohh...angel. M'right here..." He senses your body moving closer to the edge, as he has several times. He moves his tongue quicker, moving his hand to start pressing on your clit. The pad of his index finger was doused immediately in the slick, producing a breathy cry from your lungs, your legs twitching as he hangs you on the edge of sweet release, massaging the tender nub as it grew puffier from the stimulation.
"Atsuya! "You whine. "F-fuck me please, oh please!"
"Mmmm...gotta cum f'me first..." He leans over you, licking the shell of your ear while his finger gently toys with your clit. "That's it, thaat's it. Lemme have it, doll..."
He kisses your shoulder. "Cum on my fingers, babygirl..."
Your fingers dig into the pillow as you gush on his hand. He chuckles softly, bringing his hand to his mouth, the lewd sound of his fingers popping from his cheeks as he tastes your love.
"Here, lookit me, angel..." He gently turns your chin with his other hand, barely prodding his fingers against the seam of your soft lips. "Taste yourself..."
You groan, drunk off the haze of post orgasm bliss as you taste his fingers, letting your tongue lick all over them and saliva dribble out of the corners of your mouth like a cock hungry slut.
"Mmm..." you purr with heavy eyelids. "So yummy, Kusa..."
His cock twitches, a generous bead of precum leaking from the tip. He kisses your temple.
"So gorgeous doll, such a perfect, naughty girl f'me..."
A whine halfway squeezes out, getting caught in your throat as you feel him discard your panties completely before he begins to swirl the broad tip of his cock at your weeping entrance and you hear the sound of his trousers falling completely on the floor behind you.
"Kusa..." You bite your lip. "Make love to me..."
"I will beautiful..." He purrs, leaning in and nuzzling his face against your ear. "Kiss me, angel..."
You lips meet and you groan when more of your lingering taste in his mouth melts onto your tongue. He kisses you deeply as his cock begins to delve into your warm cunt from behind. You pant slightly into the kiss as you feel him stretch you. Your velvet walls hugging his cock, slowly sucking him in.
"S'alright..." He breathes into your mouth. "S'alright doll..." He kisses you softly, sloppily, more deeply to distract you from his size.
"Doin so good....so good, pretty..." He coos roughly.
You feel yourself surrender little by little, the ridged, sinful feeling of the veins of his cock massaging your plush walls, delivering euphoria from the heavenly friction. You released a breathy moan in tandem with the husky grunt he makes in your ear when he eventually bottoms out inside of you.
He pauses and you feel the generous length twitch, making you bite your lip. He sits up a bit, reverently, admiring the sight of himself buried deeply into you from behind.
Your beautiful ass all spread out in front of him, pussy molded to his cock like it was meant for him. Like this was truly the first time he was giving himself to you. The other times before paling in comparison to this exclusive moment with you, all to himself.
He groans and runs his palms over the expanse of your ass, cementing the image in his psyche permanently before leaving a couple small kisses on your lower back.
"M'gonna start moving, doll..." He whispers, interlacing his fingers in between yours on the pillow.
You feel his chest press into your back as his hips retreat slightly. A quiet, filthy squelch from the buildup of arousal around the base, before he rapidly presses his cock back inside you in one deep fell swoop with a wet plop.
"Mmm...Kusa..." You moan as he feeds you stroke, after slow stroke. The prolonged time between thrusts, the increased drag of his cock carried promise that was quickly fulfilled so deliciously and deeply with each time he thrust inside you. The tempo was smooth, soft. It was erotically intimate, his lips brushing your ear, cradling your chin in his hand while he slowly fucked you.
"Fuck...fuck.....mnnnnhhh...baby, grippin' me so tight..."
You let his presence overpower you, nothing in this moment besides being under this man, this rugged, fine man showing a side of himself that surely had your mind and body falling for him, and letting him fuck you deeply with his cock.
"So damn beautiful....so pretty..." He gently grips your throat.
You feel yourself dripping, your pussy hungrier for more connection, more intensity as the pleasure began to flood you from the inside.
"H-Harder, Kusa..."
Kusakabe groans, tapering into a breathy chuckle as he scoffed.
"Wanted it nice n'slow all night, n'now you're wantin' me to go rough on ya, doll?"
He teases as he nibbles your ear, the slow pumps of his cock unrelenting, until he gives one abrupt, sharp thrust that sets every nerve on fire and brain fogged with euphoria.
"Ohhhhh.....God yes...yes Kusa... harder....faster...please!"
He moans deeply, his hips picking up the pace. When you begged so sweetly for him, he couldn't do anything but say no.
"Shit, baby...." His fingers press into your cheek, bringing your face closer to his, his hoarse pants in your ear as he drilled his cock into you from behind.
"Gonna be real hard to last much longer if you keep beggin..."
His thumb slips into your mouth and you moan graciously. The new pace felt heavenly but you needed more. More rough, more dirty. Moving past taking things slow and soft to just having him absolutely fuck all sense out of you.
"Harder, Kusa..."
And a switch goes off, taking the liberty of reverting back to his usual style of rough and fast, but with no shortage of passion and pleasure as he wound his fingers tightly into your hair, using his other hand to grip your hip and pull you into his feverish thrusts.
Your asscheeks clap together as he pounds your pussy into the mattress, moving from keeping his hands in your hair and his lips brushing your ear to sitting back on his heels, pressing your cheek into the mattress with a hand on the back of your neck and fucking you at a harsher angle.
You moan and pant loudly releasing an unending chant of his name, "Kusa....fuck Kusa....so good, so good..."
"Fuck..." He smacks your ass, his chest coated in a sheen of sweat as he sits back like a king, watching his slick covered cock slide rapidly in and out of your soaked pussy, the entire length disappearing and nearly completely pulling out before abruptly driving back into you.
"Keep taking my cock beautiful.... that's it, thaaat's it." He closes his eyes, tossing his head back momentarily as he senses his release right around the corner.
"Gonna paint this gorgeous ass all over with my cum..." He leans in. "You want that don't you, doll...? Tell me you want it..."
He presses a soft kiss to your cheek, his thrusts slowing down considerably but the length of each stroke remaining long and agonizingly deep, nearly reaching your cervix every time with every deep roll of his hips.
"Want it Kusa...want your cum..."
"Say you want me..." He whispers.
"I want you, Atsuya. Fuck me so good and cum just for me, please, baby..."
"Jesus... FUCK!"
He pulls out quickly, grunting as his hand grips his shaft, coaxing long generous ropes of milky white cum all over your ass and lower back, his voice hoarse as he pants with exhaustion.
You stay there, frozen, numbly, panting as well as you untangle from the throes of pleasure.
"Hold on, doll..." Kusakabe gets up, flashing a very pleasant view of his back and cute backside, a scar here and there imprinted in between the ridges of muscle.
He returns with a towel, wiping up his cum and then kissing your shoulder before he climbs into bed with you, running a hand through his hair as he pulls you into his chest.
"Here..." He gestures for you to sit up, unclasping your lacey bra that had remained on during the entire time, both of you sighing deeply as your bare skin met in sensual bliss underneath the sheets.
"Much better..." You say softly, closing your eyes.
Kusakabe smiles tenderly at you, leaning in to kiss your forehead. "You're too good to me, sweetheart." He sighs again as his nails brush your upper arm in haphazard circles. "Thank you."
"Anytime, Kusa." You look up at him and smile sweetly, a playful look in your eye that says the late hour hasn't gotten to you just yet.
He hums, drinking in your features, a finger winding its way amidst a stray piece of hair framing your face. As his mind becomes less clouded, he remembers his obligations in Shibuya and his phone in his pocket that must have dozens of notifications by now, a subtle feeling of dread beginning to assemble in his lower belly.
He wished he could shatter time.
You look up at him, taking in his warm irises, his musk that remained subtly laced in his aftershave, his sharp jaw. You could sense a shift, a hidden disquieting energy simmering in his silence.
"You okay, Atsuya?"
He looks at you balancing your chin on his shoulder, a pleasant expression tugging at his mouth at the pretty sight of you staring up at him.
"Yeah..." He leans in kissing you. "Yeah, m’alright, doll, you? Ya tired?"
"Good..." You murmur, pausing with your eyes closed after his lips retreated a short distance from yours, gently shaking your head. "I'm okay. Do you have to go tonight, Kusa…?”
Kusakabe sighs, rubbing a hand over his face as you asked him a question he still did not have a concrete answer to.
"I might...but the room's booked for the night as always, you're welcome to stay..."
He looks down at you, a bit of concern in his eyes at the sight of your slight disappointment at his answer.
Not wanting you to feel used, he tries to reassure you.
"But I'm in no rush..." He gives you a warm smile, gently squeezing your inner thighs. "You're not ready to get some sleep yet?"
"No..." a playfulness marks your pupils which Kusakabe picks up the underlying implications immediately. "I could lose another hour, or two."
"Could you now?" Kusakabe's eyebrows crinkle with mischief, shoving thoughts of Shibuya aside once he had something much less grim, much more lovelier, much more intimate, enticing, and alluring beckoning for his attention once again.
"Mhmm.." a faint smirk begins to curl on your lips.
"That's good.." Kusakabe whispers.
You moan weakly as he lets your thighs fall open and he begins softly rubbing your clit once again, his lips brushing your ear.
"Cause right now, I have all the time in the world."
-----
Your eyes close and flicker open quickly, the disorient of sleep confusing you momentarily, realizing that at least a couple hours must have passed despite the seeming blink of an eye.
A little bit of disappointment creeps onto your face when you see Kusakabe silently dressing, pulling his white dress shirt over his broad bare shoulders that outlined against the faint glow of empire city lights behind the drawn silk curtains.
"Where are you going, Kusa?"
He is alerted to your awake state, sighs, and turns as he manages a smile.
"Gotta take care of some business in Shibuya, angel. You know how it is." He melts a little bit when you take his hand and pull him closer, pressing your cheek against it.
"Don't go, Kusa..."
He groans a little bit. Why'd you have to be so damn sweet?
All at once, he's aware of something odd. A feeling for you he didn't quite place before. Something that lasted beyond just the wrinkled sheets, the low light and seductive atmosphere of the bedroom. Something real that transcended the sensuality of the night and remained in the morning when you could wake up side by side together. And, as you look up at him now, he knows he's screwed.
"Believe me, I don't wanna go either, doll..." He sighs deeply as you start slowly kissing his palm.
Fuck, and you had the nerve to do it while looking dead at him with those lovely twinkling eyes of yours.
"Would much rather stay in this bed with you..."
His eyes nearly pop out of his skull when you press his palm against your breast. He's immediately unable to resist squeezing it as you pull him back on top of you, still fully dressed, the rough fleece of his brown coat on top of your soft, naked body.
"Fuck, don't look at me like that, doll. Y'know what that does to me..." He mumbles weakly as you kiss each other deeply, before he pulls away briefly for air.
For a moment suspended in the passion, all you see is warmth staring back at you and it simultaneously dawns on him.
Moments like these were worth staying alive for, worth not risking his life tonight for. An angel like you. Someone he could idle hours away with. Learning one another. Sharing space with someone he didn't mind tangling souls with for a bit. Softness and warmth and connection.
Could you be his?
"When will I see you again?" You whisper, brushing your nose against his.
Kusakabe kisses your hand. "Soon, angel. You'll see me real soon..."
"Kusa..."
He groans, a cloak of protectiveness over you that completely overwhelms him as he hugs you tightly one more time.
"Be safe, okay? You'll watch out for Kento too, right, Kusa?" You murmur against his chest, drinking in the oasis of his spiced cologne along with the smell of the city when rain mixes with smoke until you can imbibe in each other again.
Kusakabe looks at you, the round tips of his fingers combing the circle of your face.
"Course I will, doll." He smiles bittersweetly, knowing your confidence you had in him betrayed any he had in himself.
But he'd try. He'd try his very best, for you.
"Get some sleep, angel. I'll be back for you soon..."
He whispers as he leaves you tucked in the billowy white sheets that clung the scent of your reunion that slowly coaxes you to sleep.
-----
He sighs as he wearily steps onto the midnight saturated street with the weight of something finally greater than himself that he left buried in that warm master bed in that grand hotel.
He puts one foot in front of the other as he gloomily trudges in the direction of the Shibuya district, thoughts of your eyes guiding every step as he quietly ponders the foreboding unknown that lay ahead.
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aliferousonyx · 2 days
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Man, I’m still tryin’ to wrap my head around this. Last Christmas, she was still my same ol’ Mabel—glitter, sweaters, all that goofy charm. Sure, a little less sparkle than usual, but not like this. Now? It’s like I’m staring at a whole new person. Guess that fight with Dipper really did a number on her… Can’t blame her for changin’, though. Two years is a long time, especially after what went down between them. But I don’t know, this just feels… different.
Mabelverse AU
Volume 1: Back in Town
Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 ||Part 8 || Part 9 || Part 10 || Part 11 ( soon )
Hiiiiiiii, howdyyy, helloooooo! 👋 It’s so nice to meet you all! Hope you’re enjoying things so far. I know, I know—it’s moving a little slow and maybe you’re still trying to figure out what’s going on (unless you’ve somehow gotten into my head… did Bill tell you?? 😏). Anywayyy, I’ve started learning anatomy because, well, yeah—I started a comic and THEN decided to learn how to draw. 😅 It’s been my only real motivation to actually sit down and learn! Honestly, I wish I could just stick a chip in my brain and learn how to draw instantly. Elon Musk, what’s the hold-up? Hurry up, chop chop! 😂
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