#and the lost potential makes me so mad

[upinthecloudss]

HC Time!

saw a picture with the person's hc's of how people sat in the class and got inspired-

i've been having brainrot over mcl these past few weeks so here you go - a product of a semi lifelong obsession.

also these are spanish names so Karla = capuccine

I know that Farres' class is a free seating kind of thing, but I HC that they eventually fell into this arrangement by their last year of high school - i feel that beemoov could've juiced out more slice of life stuff with the class so here i am

lowk i get this from hints from dialogues but these r my personal hc's of how classes would be at Sweet Amoris' Class F (F for Farres, not the grades they get lmao) - ignore the a in the pic i had a brain fart and i'm too lazy to change it

i yap so beware under the cut

Class F

they share all classes in the same room except for science, arts and pe so this is them in their natural environment

the people in the first row kinda keep to themselves

its the last two which initiate most of the banter (ie the twins mostly) BUT others tend to join in most of the time.

the first row is the most 'serious' about their studies

genuinely the 'problem' class of the school - it's either peggy trying to camouflage herself with the couch in the teachers room, nath and castiel on the verge of killing each other, amber, alexy and rosa's costume fiasco, and CANDY capitalised bcus she's genuinely involved in everyone's life at some point (chismosavirus i love her)

they don't all get along in a 'family' sense, but they did grow familiar with each other over the years and there are some very close friendgroups in their class

when they need to, they definitely can unite (they even convinced amber, li and charlotte to help with the bunnies, which was insane to me)

ik that they are all ver cliche-ish characters, but mcl surpisingly made them work very well together

Farres

teaches geography & history but is also Candy's class homeroom teacher

ppl tend to walk all over him which is something he cannot avoid with students in any of his classes

loser man he's v funny to me

if nath or melody are not in class and he asks a question there is always a 10 second long silence AT LEAST

trying his best bless his heart

i hc that the class gave him a goodbye gift of sorts after graduating, thanking him for his patience with their insane antics

maybe something like them naming a bunny in lysander's family farm after him or something as bizzare like that - call back to the time they almost got him fired in ep 18 with the bunnies they let out

All these hc's are about them in the class environment, but there is sm more i have in my back pocket

Nath

his dad's pressure to excel in school is obv influenced him sitting first row

even after gaining his independence, we still see him become valedictorian on ep 39 (?) or 40 i forgot so i assume that he started being more relaxed about his studies AFTER hsl

that's why he usually stays in that seat for most of his hsl

imo best seat in the class if you want to pay attention - close to the teacher but also right in front of the whiteboard

not a teachers pet, but castiel likes to use his choice of seat in a free seating class as an opportunity to call him one lmao

doesn't really care about who sits next to him, choice of seat was solely out of the need to keep up with his father's standards

doesn't mind sitting next to melody, even if he feels a bit overwhelmed by her constant attention, bcus he knows that she's also a diligent student

doesn't answer every question, but tends to raise his hand more than once every class

straight a's - we all know this

doesn't interrupt classes if it's not school-related - so don't expect him to be adding onto any banter that may go on during class time (unless it's castiel provoking him, but he only tends to speak up after his independence from his parents in ep 23)

ppl don't tend to listen to him when he asks for silence in the class (when farres is also unable to shut ppl up prior LMAO)

some ppl tend to find him annoying - too perfect for their liking - but after the whole ordeal with his dad people cut him some slack and realise that their annoyance prolly came from jealousy

sm angst material but let's move on

Melody

(apologies if i'm too mean to her,,, i dont love her character and it's not even about the nath possesiveness, more on that in another post if i feel like it :p)

this simp would have sat on mud in a heartbeat if it meant sitting next to nath

i always hc'd that, even though she is a good student, having a crush on nath actually drove her to be even better as a way to impress him

so, she chose to sit first row mainly bcus she is a good student, but deep down (or not that deep down lmao) knowing that she could've chose any of the other chairs in the row, it's obvious why she chose that specific seat out of any other

since she sits closest to Mr Farres out of everyone and shes also class rep, she's usually the one to hand out worksheets or go on errands for teachers (given that it's not an important job that fits nathaniel's role better)

ACTUAL teachers pet - it kind of annoys most in the class (even irks nath at some points lmao) bcus she always seems to eager to prove herself in a super obnoxious way

straight a's but is the type of whiny girl to be upset at anything less than an a (i get her)

looks down on ppl that don't get good grades and is kinda condescending (i don't relate there)

type of girl to SHHHH people loudly even if they're literally whispering

candy and rosa are big victims of this given that they are (1) chismosas by nature (2) sit right behind her

her attitude doesn't really change throughout school life

if you are nath route i imagine she absolutely stares daggers at us or anyone else when nath sits next to them in class

Lysander

before you pull out the pitchforks telling me about lys and castiel being besties - this doesn't mean that they have to sit together in class

hear me out

lysander is more serious about his studies, even if he is quiet he is a diligent student.

nath actually respects and kinda resents him for this, you can see that he doesn't have the pressure to be a good student that nath has but he still tries his best and does very well in class (straight low a's / high b's student imo)

angst hc's another time i swear

best classes/ones he enjoys the most are lit and history

castiel tends to call him a nerd, lovingly, opposed to how he does it to nath

doesn't participate much in class, but when he does it's usually to give correct answers when the class seems to draw on a blank

or bcus he is asked directly by Farres, lmao

before priya came in their second to last year of high school (my hc timeline but idk) lysander sat alone in the table so castiel would go over and sit next to him if he felt like spending more time with his best friend every now and then

he tends to enjoy his peace, so doesn't mind sitting alone

gets along well with priya when they sit together, but they tend to sit in comfortable silence

doesn't write much of his personal writing during class, he learnt that people tend to be way too curious and try to take a peek

or ask him to read it aloud to the rest of the class - that one lit class was a living hell for him

tends to daydream in class if he's tired

Priya

my beloved,,,, they will never make me hate you

came in last of everyone in the class so she took the only remaining seat

is still a beast in studies so it doesn't matter where she sits - will get straight a's anyway

except for art lmao

type of student melody wishes she were

effortlessly smart - and when she gives answers she's not overly snobbish

shes so ,,,, marry me

who said that

is up to sitting next to anyone that isn't amber's witch crowd - but if she ends up near them she doesn't hesistate to put them in their place

offers to switch places with friends that may be struggling more with classes and sit in rows behind her- she knows that sitting closer to the front will force people to focus more (it's usually kim or candy who get these offers from priya, bcus she knows that they have the potential and priya hates seeing them fall behind - and candy yaps too much with rosa sometimes)

she's always looking out for people, helping with violette and kim in maths with difficult exercises etcetc

i see her calling out an answer umprompted if she sees that the person that the teacher asked to has no idea - if she likes the person ofc

Delanay: what is a mitochondria?

candy: uhhhhhh

priya: POWERHOUSE OF -

ik that answer is wrong shut up

doesn't give two shits about being a 'model' student, she is interested in learning so that makes her a good student by default

loves history - political side of it even more, and can go on long tangents on all the 'underdogs' of history and on giving a voice to the less fortunate

cannot stand when people blame teachers when its their own incompetence in a subject

e.g will get so angry when Li complains about 'how she was supposed to know that europe is not a country if farres never told them' in an exam on the european union

gets mostly a's, some b's big fat d's in art im afraid tho

she knows the struggles of teachers given that her mother teaches elementary students so isn't ever really too disrespectful (with limits, she sometimes joins in on banter)

Kim

has a lot of potential, but tends to be demotivated when she compares herself with the 'smart' people

what she doesn't realise is that she could be as 'smart' as them if she also put in the same effort as them

she does let her grades slip at some point, but she never does so deliberately

complicated history with studying, i forgot if it was her mom who dropped studying when she was her age and then went back to it once kim was in high school (mentioned in the ep with iris' party), but tries her best to not let down her parents

sat next to violette who was too scared to sit on the same row as amber and company, but wouldn't have minded sitting further back

you will never catch her dead getting herself involved in class

during her time being tutored by nath, he challenged her to answer a question in class

he called her a coward, basically, so she did it ONCE to defend her honour

but then once became a few times as she became more confident with her abilities

graduated with b's, even a stray a in the mix

would never admit it but she's very thankful for nath and candy's help and appreciates the supportiveness from her friends + family to not quit on trying in school

if you look at her during class, you will know exactly what she is thinking about - it's all on her face

doesn't understand class? furrowed brows, pout and frustrated mumbling while she scratches away at her page

is annoyed at amber's stupid remarks? rolls her eyes to the back of her head so hard

got a good grade? her eyes sparkle just a little bit, "no violette what are you talking about i just got some dust in my eye-"

overall wins the idgaf war i love her

Violette

so debilitatingly shy bless her heart

will NEVER open her mouth in class

if she is asked to answer kim will jump to answer umprompted, a la priya

"sorry sir i thought you were asking me"

"is your name violette?"

all of her notes have a new 'doodle' in the margins

but the doodles are like

masterpieces

mostly portraits of her friends, kim and alexy taking the spotlight

as well as her dad

and maybe her mom? but she tends to get emotional so she reserves those drawing for outside the classroom

karla tried to pick on her one time for drawing in class and kim scared her into not messing with anyone for a whole week, and violette ever again

people are so supportive when she actually makes an attempt to speak, even castiel knows to shut up with his sarcastic remarks

but then the silence freaks her out and next time u will hear her will be in 2 business years at least

or karla laughs at her stuttering or something (looking for amber's approval) but that happens only once thanks to kim

amber and her friends don't pick on her much, simply because they prefer to go for girls that they are jealous of and she never draws their attention

Rosa

is the type of student to have 1000s of excused absences

leigh signs her permission slips and stuff and since the headmistress can't be arsed to do her job properly she gets away with it lmao

actually gets by well with exams

she already has a dream to move onto the fashion industry so she isn't too worried about her grades

chismosavirus #1 she will always be the first to be called out by teachers for trying to gossip in class

she's always super offended by the scolding even though its 100% true

"i was literally whispering!! besides, your date with [crush] is way more important than trigonometry"

"we had a map of asia on the whiteboard, rosa"

candy always has to stop rosa from strangling amber and co. everytime they pick on her best friend

"it's not worth it rosa"

"you are way too nice, if i were you they would be dead in a ditch by now"

"what?"

"what?"

does people's makeup or gives tips during homeroom if they ask her to

she loves it

or sometimes candy's hair during class

"this is not a beauty salon girls"

does it anyway

Candy

depends on the player ofc, but she's obviously shown to have high capacities in school if she applies herself - so her grades are entirely up to her

theoretically sits next to rosa, but since her best friend doesn't come to school too often people sit next to her if they feel like it (like our route or alexy hehe)

chismosavirus #2 bcus rosa infected her and also that how she is by nature

doesn't cause many problems in class, and only includes herself in the banter of the class if she is directly dragged into it by the back rows.

sits in front of the witch crowd and is sadly a victim of their annoying teasing

i love her but she cannot defend herself for the first 30 episodes of the series i swear

she does sit in front of charlotte, who is the 'chillest' of the trio so she usually gets peace in class if they feel like ignoring her

besides, she REFUSES to change seats because of them - she would never give them the satisfaction

Iris

the backbone of the class for sure

is surprisingly good friends with castiel so she's the designated 'peacemaker' if its a small thing (not if theyre literally about to punch each other, she's not suicidal)

and also gets along well enough with most people fine enough

"if someone is acting mean it's probably a mistake" my girl is too good for this world

genuinely tries her best but is lost in class like, 80% of the time

barely passes her exams but she passed so you go queen

she's not like, stupid, but school is not the path for her

laughs at stupid jokes that the more extroverted people make in the middle of class, but isn't usually the one to start anything in class

participates if asked to

doesn't mean she gets the questions right

isn't picky about who she sits with, was the only one who was willing to sit next to karla

so that's where she ended up

Karla

so she obv chose to sit next to amber's friend group, even though its obvious she's not really a part of their group

ALWAYS acting out to bully anyone as a way to 'prove' herelf to them

people tend to ignore her, like flat out

she's so forgettable that teachers even forget to rlly punish her for any out of line comments

actually good at school, but hides it as much as she can

because of this, and other things, charlotte respects her the least - shes basically dragging herself across the floor for their approval

plain annoying but forgettable

never really makes good friends with anyone - comes close to it with melody (but them both have self esteem problems and make it everyone else's problem, so ig that's why they get along better than others) and iris but because shes enemy to no one

Charlotte

most 'quiet' of the witches trio but doesn't mean she's not as cruel outside of the classroom

gets respectably high grades, but could get much better if she tried

also strong contender of the idgaf war

but you can never really tell what she's thinking of people when they speak in class

or at any point

keeps to herself and her friends but loves to jump at the opportunity to be mean to candy by whispering shit to her

is the more indirect type of cruel, will give karla the silent treatment, literally does not acknowledge her ever

she hasn't stuck gum to candy's hair by now because of rosa's presence, she's annoyingly perceptive,,,

when she leaves school Li takes her place

outright refuses to answer any question that farres asks her

"ms charlotte! would you mind sharing your answer with the rest of the class? it was exceptionally well written"

"i would mind, yes"

sat there bcus amber sat there

Amber

she is so annoying god bless castiel's soul

sat in front of him as "an infallible flirting tactic"

"trust me Li - doing it in the long run will have him at my feet by next month tops"

is the type of girl to throw her hair on top of the table behind her

castiel tried to cut it once in retaliation once he saw that she wouldn't get the hint when he pulled on it anytime she did it

"he was too shy to try to braid my hair, i'm subtly giving him chances to make him go crazy for me. trust me li trust me."

literally only sat there to try to get with castiel

he couldn't give less of a shit, is incredibly annoyed by her

and chooses to ignore her

has barely passing grades, but she lies about it to her parents

besides, they tend to pay more attention to nath's results

"what can i say, i'm just daddy's little girl"

... moving on

always sprays 2000 spritzes of perfume and chokes armin because she does it in his direction

"AMBER i'm going to die from asphyxia if you keep spraying that shit liquid on me"

"MR KEENAN LANGUAGE"

"i didn't know you knew what the word asphyxia meant bro"

"shut up alexy"

always has the most stupid things to say

it has candy sighing loudly

"SIR CANDY IS TELLING ME TO SHUT UP"

"I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING"

"YOU THOUGHT OF IT"

"WE ALL DID"

outright annoying

tends to insult candy, armin, alexy, and kentin the most but her preffered pick will always be candy

Li

genuinely stupid holy shit

"europe is a very big country"

surprised she didn't fail her final exams

insisted on sitting next to amber but since there were no more tables she just pulled a chair next to her

farres tried to make her move but she ignored him lmao

if it's a more strict teacher she moves next to lysander before priya came in

after that she used the excuse that there is no other seats to stay there

took charlotte's seat when she left

out of the three, makes the stupidest remarks

doesn't initiate the bullying, but its always her just repeating anything that amber or charlotte say like a parrot

literally bird brain

not much to say, doesn't involve herself in class

mostly looks at herself in the mirror during class or browses high end clothing stores online

loaded asf so has convinced herself that grades don't matter

will be the death of her parents one day

Alexy

came in after most people and wanted to sit near his brother so they sat at the back where there were three seats available

armin sat next to castiel because he was more 'covered' by the three girls in the table in front of him to play his console

so alexy ended up sitting alone in the table next to armin for a little until kentin showed up

lowk a blessing for him bcus we all know he was defo into him

always one of the most talkative, or to join in on jokes that his brother screams out in the middle of class

not a class clown, but usually the one to start interruptions in class

he doesn't even intend to interrupt, but he likes 'commentating' on what is going on - his words

okay at studies, is indifferent to his grades and has no pressure to do well by his parents

this seating arrangement was the cause of him becoming closer to kentin - even if they never became anything that alexy would've wanted to, he appreciates their time spent together

teases kentin in class alongside his twin

peak 'people in the back row' meme type shi

brings snacks to share with the back row

armin, alexy (and kentin even if he likes to complain) are usually messing around a whole lot but tend to go unnoticed

Armin

sat at the covered seat next to castiel so that his teachers let him play his games in peace

type of person to put his console behind an upside down book

has a surprisingly peaceful coexistence with his table buddy

castiel hates that he calls him irl table moot

catch him playing on his console 90% of the time - the 10% is Delanay's classes

calms down with it over the years but never abandons his gaming

he's gets frustratingly high grades considering the little attention he pays in any of his classes

speaks in brainrot

can't stop himself from spouting out the most chronically online shit in class

it's so strange one would think he is playing videogames and not paying attention and then will just

"can someone tell me what is the name of the city that is being covered by my finger right now?" "LMAO KID NAMED FINGER"

all while having his eyes glued to the screen of his PSP

only candy sometimes laughs if shes his route bcus she's equally as nerdy

if not it is met with the most awkard silence

he's so unfunny bless him

everyone but alexy question his sanity but eventually get used to it

likes to have 'back row basketball' competitions with his brother (and kentin, who they always manage to pull at least one attempt out of him) where the first person to get a piece of paper into the bin next to mr farres' table wins

mr farres has given up on trying to stop them

he's just used to flying balls of paper whooshing past his head

atp who cares, as long as they don't hit him

or they also try to see whoever manages to land a spitball on amber's head without her noticing for the remainder of the class

castiel likes to join in on that one

Kentin

came in a bit after the twins so had limited seat choices

didn't really feel like sitting first row with lysander and also wanted to have candy in his line of sight so he went for the seat next to alexy at the back

says he regrets it sm because the 'twins are so annoying' but never made an attempt to change seats

"oh kennykins~ when will you ever let me give you a style change from those horrible military style pants??"

"you can't escape from my brother on a fashion mission kenny"

"IT'S KENTIN i can´t stand the two of you"

also okay at his studies, his dad only cares about his results in p.e tbh (angst material again but ill ramble in another post)

is kinda iffy aboout sitting in the same row as castiel but will never admit it

besides the twins are like a buffer zone so it's okay

doesn't stop castiel from laughing at them bullying teasing him

kentin gets so defensive bless him

"WHAT DID YOU SAY- SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE"

"KENTIN GO OUT TO THE CORRIDOR RIGHT NOW AND CALM YOURSELF DOWN"

and it was just castiel releasing air through his nose to laugh

he pretends he hates the back row but he has to admit that he has the most fun there

made his best friends there literally (not castiel tho sorry king)

and its kinda a release from the expectations to be a 'man' from his dad and just to be silly with his friends

and now im getting angsty lets move on

if candy is kentin route and he sits with her some time,,,, oh lord

when he goes to sit at the back row the next day he is received as some kind of cheating husband coming back to his unstable wife

"so i see you finally got bored of us"

"its okay kennykins *sniff* we understand that we will never be her"

"you are breaking our hearts and you don't even seem to care"

"the betrayal,,, how can you even come back after all that you have done?"

this continues on for the rest of the day until kentin agrees to buy them lunch

Castiel

does not give af

bad boy cliche - sits at the back, feet on the table and doesn't write down a single line of writing if he can

chose to sit at the back simply because he doesn't care for classes

finds armin entertaining, even if he calls him 'irl table moot' and generally doesn't really understand any of his jokes

does find the twins´ jokes funny if its them making fun of kentin

also doesn't care for kentin being scared of him or trying to pick a fight in class

is on the verge of strangling amber anytime she tries her weird ass flirting on him

him being salutatorian at graduation is so funny to me because he proved that all that his teachers gave him shit for "because you will never get passing grades with your behaviour" and here he is

only time he contributes to class is to throw snarky remarks at people - mostly nath ofc

sarcastic man apocalypse and he is their king

will sit next to lys if he feels like it sometimes but he is mostly allergic to breathing the same air as 'first row smarty mcfuck boy" (one of his many loving nicknames to nath <3)

[thechosenanubis]

I actually do agree, like there is so much wasted potential it's unreal. And the lack of foreshadowing of their chosirian connection in S2 drives me batshit insane. Like a crumb? A hint? Anything would have been better than just Senkhara showing up in Fabian and Eddie room and give them a nightmare/dream where they do the *spiderman meme* at each other.

Take for example the plot point of when Nina is stuck in the cell during the Senet task. The writers, with a single line of dialogue could have done the job. Like, maybe Eddie would have been like: " Is Nina ok?" or " I'm strangely tense and idk why" just- something!

Or maybe (since they were the only two Americans on the block) one single interaction where they talked about how different the UK is to the USA, and maybe a hint of a connection between them. Something along the lines: " it seems we have known each other forever" " or " it's very easy to talk to you..." would've sufficed y'know?

I really wish we had more neddie interactions!!! Like I’m not a neddie shipper beyond them having a platonic relationship, but I would have given anything to see them have at least one proper interaction. Especially since they’re basically spiritually linked.

Like the fact that they’re the only Americans at Anubis is already the simplest excuse as to why they should have talked. They would have talked about being homesick, where they’re from in the US, what the American education system was like etc. the fact that the writers never made use of this sends meeeeeeeeee

Also he was meant to be her protecter. So they could have hinted about it a lot through out the season. For example Nina saying something about how she feels like she’s met Eddie before or that she feels like she can trust him with her life. As corny as it is I wish we got something fml

JUST ANY NEDDIE CRUMBS WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE ASSDFGGJL

[helldritch6211]

If i re wrote red hood outlaws + arsenal n red would you want to see snippets of that or would you roast me on a pike?

[skyblueartt]

Me theorizing about the motives behind a fictional killer

[longagoitwastuesday]

Going through the Utahim.e tag had me checking several times if at some point I had clicked on the G.ojo/Utahim.e one instead

[bilestat]

.

[transmasc-wizard]

throwing myself at the foot of a therapist's chair saying Please pretty please explain to me what these symptoms are caused by

[francy-sketches]

Why do people who enjoy spam liking always act so high and mighty about it ‘well I like it when someone likes all 200 of my posts bc it means they love and cherish my creations, I’m sorry you’re a cold hearted grinch and don’t have any appreciation for the common people who love your work, maybe if you stopped being such a snob 🙄’ ok bitch good for you?? I just like reading people’s comments/tags on my art and having a lot of individual like notifications clogs it up so it gets a little annoying that’s all. If spam liking makes you feel good that’s great I’m happy for you but it’s just a matter of personal preference it doesn’t make either of us morally superior lol get off your high horse

[wishbonedean]

Supernatural *is* a horror show first and foremost.

it has been said before but i feel the need to state again that the finale of supernatural is not only the most insane case of accidentally making a soul crushing psychological horror while trying to make a satisfying conclusion but the only case of that happening ever (at least to my knowledge.) i’ve seen bad tv endings, but never a tv ending that was trying to be comforting instead telling me that all of my worst nightmares are true and that me and the ones i hold close will never ever love openly without fear. again, so many before me have made this point but god. they killed him on rebar. he never got to be free

[unnonexistence]

i love my simic mtg deck so much

[deathbxnny]

Maybe a part 2 of the arcane characters saying things they regret, but they're apologizing because I can't live after reading a angst 🫠

Making up with Arcane characters after a bad argument. | Vi, Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Sevika x Gn!Reader

(Previous part)

Fine, fine, here is a happy part two guys. Take it as an apology for the tears and pain I've caused.✨️

Content: Swearing, accusations of cheating, slight angst, making up, fluff, potential spoilers for season 2, established romantic relationships, sfw

Reader has no set pronouns!

((Not proofread))

》VI

She knew that she had fucked up. There was no way to deny or refute it either. And your absence was further proof of that.

You were always there for her, even when things got bad and she became even worse. No matter how much she yelled or drank, you were there afterward to nurture her back to health. It was so unfair of her to expect it still, after all she had said to you. She hated herself. She hated how weak and pathetic she had become. How she can't even stand straight anymore from the alcohol and couldn't win a single game since she had lost you.

And instead of Caitlyn haunting her like she used to, it was only you now. But you were crying every time. Asking her why she hated you so much. Why she couldn't care for you the way you cared for her. Why you were always the second choice despite having been there since the start.

Why, why, why.

Gritting her teeth against the headache, she made her way through the dark, familiar lanes to your small home that you once shared together. She had to talk to you. She really, really had to. Even if it's far too late now after a week of silence in-between the two of you. She had taken the time to reflect and think about everything, especially about your relationship. And it made her realise that nothing in this world was losing you too.

Knocking on your door, she nervously waited as she heard your footsteps quickly approaching her from inside. You opened the door carefully, ironically just how she had taught you, before freezing at the sight of her. She gave you a weak smile, attempting to look calm and friendly, but it still scared you off. "Hey cupca-" You tried slamming the door into her face mid greeting, but her foot was faster to jam itself in the way.

"H-Hey! Wait, please hear me out!" "Fuck off, Vi. I'm not in the mood to hear more of your bullshit. Go back to Caitlyn since I know how badly you want that!" You never cursed, and every word you spoke made her flinch. She, for some reason, didn't expect you to be this mad. But it hurt, and she deserved it. Another thing she underestimated was, unfortunately, your strength since you somehow managed to push her away and shut the door again. "Come on! Please! I... I didn't mean what I said. I just... have been losing my shit ever since what happened. The guilt is killing me, and I know it's not an excuse! You're right, I have to stop this shit! You're right, I need to stop treating your love for granted!"

She didn't know if you were even listening to her anymore, but it didn't stop the tears that burned in her eyes. "I don't give a damn about Caitlyn like that! I never did! It always you for me. You... you cared for me when no one else ever wanted to, and I was such an idiot for not appreciating it more." Her hand slammed against the wood in defeat, her head coming to rest against it as her body trembled. She was so scared of losing you. This can't be the end. "Please. Please just give me another chance to prove myself. I know I'm a fuck up but I swear I'll do better now."

Vi nearly fell right through your house entrance when you opened the door wide with a teary huff. "God, you're such an idiot... get in already before the neighbors complain." You didn't let her reply as you simply dragged her inside and locked the door again. The pitfighter watched you do so with a gentle gaze, one that felt so familiar to you. "... Fine, I'll give you another chance... but no drinking or fighting anymore. Please." You whisper to her, and she nods quickly before engulfing you in a warm hug.

She knows that she isn't fully forgiven yet, but she'll do everything in her power to prove herself worthy of your love again.

》CAITLYN

"You're still up." Caitlyn's voice was calm and gentle now, so different from the stern and cold tone it had before. You ignored her, however, knowing better than to fall for this again. She always got like this when she knew she had screwed up and was trying to crawl back into your good graces. But this time around, you didn't allow it that easily. You refused to speak to her if she hadn't come back to apologize. And yet... you couldn't help but allow yourself at least one sharp dig at her. "And you're late to bed once again. But I suppose Officer Nolan's 'report' was just that interesting, no?" You were perhaps the only person in all auf Pultover that could ever accuse her of something so scandalous as adultery and get away with it.

It certainly would have been amusing if Caitlyn didn't feel so sick at the thought of you believing that.

Sighing, she placed her hat onto a clothing hanger, her jacket following suit. You were facing away from her on the bed, trying to read a book and rest, despite the pain in your heart. It was hard being angry at her when you loved her so deeply. But her insults had struck much deeper than that.

The bed dipped behind you, and soon enough, you felt her strong arms surrounding your body and her nose tickling your cheek. "I'm sorry, my love. I really am. I... have lost my cool, and that was wrong of me." You scoffed at her words, finding them too shallow for the pain she had caused earlier. Yet you struggled to get out of her strong grasp on you. It felt desperate. And you hated the warmth and security that it made you feel. "If that is all you have to say, then you can leave." You hissed out weakly but couldn't find any malice in it. Just heartbreak, that solidified in more tears burning in your eyes. "Because how... how could you ever say that I could betray you? Do you know how that makes me feel? Do you care?"

Caitlyn hummed against the nape of your neck soothingly, a way to acknowledge the plight she had caused you without revealing her own tears. The grief had made her into a monster. A monster that hurt its friends, family, and most importantly, you. It was unforgivable, and yet she wanted to prove herself worthy of you anyway. She wanted to show you that she hadn't changed deep down like everyone claimed. She was still yours.

"... I will find a way to end this war and resolve it peacefully as soon as I can. I swear it to you." She began, her voice low and gentle, as she listened to the sound of your hiccups and sniffling. This wasn't what she wanted. "And I apologize, truly, for what I called you... I know that you are loyal and trustworthy. Much more than I ever could be... I'm still your Caitlyn." The last part was whispered quietly, as she tried everyone in her power to not break down in front of you like this.

She hated what she had become deep down. She knew it was wrong and that her mother must've been turning in her grave at the sight of what she had done. But what she couldn't handle at all was you hating and leaving her.

There was a moment of silence before you turned to face her and immideatly hugged her impossibly close as you cried into her arms. She rubbed your back lovingly, understanding that this was your way of accepting her apology. But forgiveness will still be a long journey she was willing to take.

For now, she'd rest in your embrace thankfully.

》JINX

Deep down, you knew that she didn't mean what she said. She never would do anything to hurt you. Silco's death was just killing her more than anyone could have expected, and it was hard for everyone to deal with. But you just couldn't take the pain and hurt she caused you anymore. You've been there since day one. You were always at her side. You always took care of her when no one else wanted to. And you understood her better than she did herself. But it was ultimately just not enough. Or so you thought.

The young girl that was now dragging you through the lanes reminded you of her too. She didn't speak a word to you, and for some reason, you didn't have it in you to protest against her odd actions either. She somehow seemed to recognize you the second you bumped into her. And that was enough for her to take your hand and lead you to a very familiar hideout. Perhaps it was fate that brought you here again when you needed Jinx the most.

"Hey kid, who's our little guest-?" The rest of the young woman's words died on her tongue, and it left you simply staring at each other. There was a familiar haze in her eyes, one that you often saw when the voices were taking over. She once mentioned that you sometimes became a part of her hallucinations during longer absences, and that reminder alone made your heart ache. You shouldn't have run away that day. But what other choice did you have? She didn't trust you anymore. She didn't think you should be together anymore. Why were you even here?

"S-sorry... I'm just going to leave..." You muttered as your ears rung and that familiar burning in your eyes made your sight blurry. You felt suffocated and somehow also angry, wishing she could just see how much you loved and cared for her. But just as you were turning away to run again, her strong hand was quicker and held you back by your arm. "Wait. Let's just... talk, alright? Like we always do?" That was your thing. Whenever things got bad, you'd sit down and talk calmly to her about it. She used to scoff at it every time... yet she was the one who suggested now for once. Something about it shook you so hard that it made the first tears finally spill at the recognition she had given you for all the work you've put into her.

Jinx panicked a little at that, unsure of how to comfort you, yet at Isha's stern frown and cross of her small arms, she just hugged you for the first time in a while. And god, did she miss it.

Perhaps it was good to show the little girl a picture of you after all.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, I swear, sweetie! I... I won't ever say stuff like that again. Just don't leave me. Please don't leave me. I just, I was just-" You hushed her by just hugging her tighter and shaking your head. "It's okay... just hold me for a while. We can talk later... I missed you so much." You whispered, voice breaking into sobs. Jinx hummed weakly and sighed against your hair, the familiar scent making her relax and feel better at last.

Isha grinned to herself behind you before quickly sneaking off to let you talk things out.

》EKKO

To say that the entire firelight hideout was pissed at him would be an understatement. Absolutely everyone disagreed with the way he treated you, and the side eyes he got very much confirmed this. But the worst part of it all was definitely you avoiding him like the plague.

Every time he entered a room, you were the first one to leave in a hurry. Every time he tried speaking to you, you either ignored him or found an excuse to get away. Every time someone even mentioned his name to you, your mood seemed to dampen. And that hurt so much that it killed him. This isn't how he wanted you to feel about him. He was your boyfriend, damnit it. Yet he acknowledged that he was failing at his job way more than he should've allowed himself to. He had to fix this somehow.

Ekko couldn't just lose you over his own foolishness. You were the one person who motivated him to keep going even on his worst days. You were the light he fought for. The person he battled to come home to every day. He couldn't handle your absence any longer, especially at night when he laid wide awake in your empty bed without you.

And so, he finally had enough and cornered you one night up in the tree during a patrol you had together. One, he definitely didn't pull the strings for to happen. And ever the one to abide by his orders despite your current dismay, you were now avoiding his gaze whilst you watched your sleeping home below. It was peaceful and calm, but the pain lingered between you two too much to enjoy the moment. He didn't know how to break the deafening silence, and it made him think of backing out on his initial plan... until you surprised him by speaking up first.

"I'm... sorry for avoiding you. I didn't mean for this to become your last resort. I just... didn't want to be a burden anymore." "Wait, wait, wait... who said that you were a burden, I... I should be the one apologizing right now. Because I was wrong about every fucking thing I said to you." The words spilled out in panic at the mere thought of you blaming yourself. He never wanted you to feel like this. It made him feel even worse about himself. This wasn't right. "You're not useless. You do so much for us, for me, and I take it all for granted like the asshole I am! And I fully acknowledge that now... I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. There is no excuse for it." He shook his head in disappointment at himself, wondering if this was it now. He'd understand if you broke up with him now... but instead, you seemed to be in the mood to surprise him alot today.

"Did you... like the food I made you?" He blinked at your question in confusion, yet answered honestly. "Best thing I had all week." "Then I guess I'll forgive you... just don't do that again." Ekko chuckled weakly at your words, relief filling his senses whilst he pulled you close to press a kiss to your head. "Would never dream of it... wanna ditch patrol and fly around town?" You mirrored his sly smile, glad he had the same thing on his mind as you did. "Sure thing. But let's make it a race."

He let you win.

》SEVIKA

She took some time to cool off after your argument and returned later into the night with a clearer mind. Sevika had actually reflected on what you had said to her, and she knew you were ultimately right. She was extremely overprotective and stubborn, two things that didn't mesh well and often ended in her thinking you couldn't take care of yourself. Even if she knew better than to actually believe that.

You were strong, especially mentally. It's what drew her into you to begin with. But with the fall of Silco and a war being on the verge of breaking out against Piltover, she had no choice but to make sure that you never left her sight. And if you did, then you had to be somewhere she knew was safe and away from all the chaos she dealt with daily. It helped her focus and stay calm to know that you're okay. Yet despite how much she cared, she still fucked it all up for herself again.

And now she had to fix it, something she was never good at.

She felt awfully guilty at the sight of the things you've lovingly prepared for her, now laying forgotten and cold on the kitchen counter. She truly didn't deserve someone as kind as you. And yet she considered herself too selfish to let you go.

Slowly approaching the bedroom door, she paused to hear if you were awake or not. Unfortunately, you were, but she only knew this from the faintest sound of your sniffling and sobbing that drifted through the wooden door. Sighing to herself, she knocked once, deciding to just rake things slow and as calmly as possible. You had sustained an injury after all, and her mind was reeling at the thought of it getting worse without any proper care. "What do you want?!" Your weak voice yelled at her, and it made her frown. Yeah, you were definitely beyond pissed.

"I want to talk." Her gruff voice said, and it may have sounded like a demand if the underlying care and worry didn't overshadow it so clearly. Your silence made her initially think you were ignoring her until the door slowly opened and revealed your disheveled form. "... well, go ahead." You muttered, one hand cradling the side of your hip that was clumsily bandaged up by you. You were never good at stuff like that.

"Let me take care of the wound whilst we're at it. Can't have ya dying on me because of an infection." She sighed out before simply dragging you to your shared bed and pulling out your medkit. You didn't protest or complain and let her do as she pleased, whilst you carefully listened to her speak with an unreadable expression.

"Listen. I... get it. I really do. The way I treat you isn't right, and I know you're grown enough to take care of yourself, but... I can't risk losing you too now. It drives me crazy to think about. Even if that ain't much of an excuse, and I get that too." She was never this honest before. Usually, she simply deflected or blamed someone else. But here she was, for once admitting openly to being the problem. "Just... be more careful out there. That's all I ask of you. I won't comment on it otherwise anymore though, unless you're in serious danger. I promise." Finishing the last of her bandaging, she hummed at it now looking much securer. This way, you are sure to recover much faster.

Taking a deep breath, you nodded your head at her words, deciding to give her another chance to prove herself. You understood where she was coming from after all. "Okay, fine. I'll accept your apology... if you help me cook." She grinned at that slightly with a casual shrug. "Fine by me, if I get a taste of your heavenly cooking, sweetheart."

[tigercomplex]

never sorry for not shutting up but goddddd oh my god the most heavenly music you've ever heard in your fucking life will be from like a youtube video with less than 1,000 videos on it from a band who's lead guy died too young. and it's simultaneously lifechanging and the shittiest thing ever

[solar-pxwered]

I was just reminded today that I gave more culture and life to Vacuo in one post than CRWBY did in 8 seasons of the show...

Let’s Talk About Vacuo!

So the God-Awful RWBY After the Fall and Before the Dawn books finally gave us canon material focused on Vacuo and, well………..it sucked. So let me share with you my heacanons regarding Vacuan culture and life!

The People:

Vacuo is the Kingdom that boasts the highest Faunus population, but has it’s fair share of humans as well. The people of Vacuo tend to be dark skinned although light skinned people are not uncommon, but make up the minority. Vacuans are proud, easy-going, street-smart, roguish, and friendly. Although they do tend to be a bit on the secretive side, they are not unwelcoming people and are always happy to have tourists in the city, especially since tourism is a great economy booster! The people of Vacuo are physically hardy and have adapted to the environmental demands of the desert very well, finding the best clothing to wear to stay cool, what places will yield clean water, how to preserve foods, how to use anything and everything to their advantage!

Festivals:

Vacuo is a hard place to live, especially for the nomadic people who rarely settle in one place, and so to shake up the monotony of the desert life, Vacuo City holds multiple festivals every year for people to attend and get some excitement and socialization. There are four major festivals, one for the beginning of each quarter of a year. The Winter Festival is, by far, the biggest and most attended since it hails the coolest period of the year.

The normally dull city is lit up with colorful lights and lanterns and candles at night and strung with bright colored banners and tapestries during the day for a total of three days and nights, with celebration going on 24 hours a day. The Bazaar is the biggest it ever is and merchants come from all over the Kingdom to trade their wares in the city during the event, street performers can be found throughout the business districts and in the plazas and near fountains, music fills the streets constantly and dances are held in the evenings and early night before the desert gets too cold, but often continue for hours into the night.

Vacuo boasts the most lively festivals in all of Remnant.

Vacuo City and It’s Surroundings

Vacuo City is a multi-leveled, sandstone and clay structured city surrounded by empty, lifeless desert. To the East a ways is the ocean but it’s quite a trek to make for a day trip. The outer edges of the city are more decrepit and poor and the further inwards you go (towards the central Academies) the richer and more affluent the structures and people become.

Vacuo City has a seedy underbelly where nightclubs, gambling and prostitution is common. Though not commonly advertised, one can easily gain access to these places with a few tips from the locals such as passwords, locations and names of the bouncers.

Things To Know When Visiting Vacuo:

Theft and pickpocketing is a common occurrence in the markets and the Bazaar, many tourists fall victim to these crimes, so it is always best to keep your money, scroll and ID close at hand!

Vacuo uses a barter system for trade among citizens quite often, while currency is normally a secondary option if a trade agreement can’t be reached. Tourists usually always only use currency and this is perfectly acceptable. 

Vacuo speaks the Common Language of Remnant, but they also have a language all their own! Sometimes they may use this against foreigners, so having a guide is always a good idea when bartering or visiting any less than reputable places.

The Vacuan Bazaar is halfway between the rich and poor center and edge of the city, so that all people in the city have access to it, while smaller marketplaces provide for individual neighborhoods throughout the city. The Bazaar is a hub of activity in the early mornings and evenings, but it remains busy all day due to the constant shade the overhangs and banners provide.

Fun fact: Kids in Vacuo break pinatas on their birthdays! They are usually filled with sweets, dried fruits, and simple, small toys. Pinatas are also common during festivals for people of all ages! Festival pinatas contain candy and dried fruit as well, but some will contain coins in place of toys.

[milawritess]

Wherever you go, that's where I'll follow — Gojo Satoru

pairing: Gojo Satoru x fem!reader

synopsis: crushed by the pressure of his work, Satoru and the reader's relationship begins to spiral. You do everything you can to make him happy, but you fear it's not enough. Maybe it never was. After a miscalculation that could have resulted in innocent lives being lost, the situation takes a turn for the worse.

Word count: 17k+ (I'm sorry in advance)

genre: heavy angst with happy ending

warnings: heavy angst, swearing, reader is a motherly figure to Megumi but their relationship is a bit strained, mentions of depression and self-doubt, reader is a sorcerer, fighting, insecurity, arguments, and breakups (?), descriptions of gore, mentions of sexual intercourse (mdni), depictions of a complicated and untraditional relationship, reader gets hurt, hardly edited/proofread (oops), gojo is fed up and mean :(

a/n: this is the first and longest thing I've ever posted on here lol. I felt like there was a lack of sorcerer!reader, so I played around with that concept a little bit. other than potentially shitty writing (sorry for any typos or grammatical errors), I truly hope you enjoy <3

“Get out.”

The hash sentiment lingers, hanging heavily in the air. 

“Well, hello to you too.”

He hears your feet shuffle across the floor as you stumble to take your shoes and coat off. “I just came to check on you.”

“And I’m fine,” he responds without moving, one arm up, draping over his aching eyes. He lies on the living room couch, one lanky leg propped up at an angle.

“You’re clearly not fine,” you respond, seeming unphased. “Have you eaten anything?” You ask, waiting for a response that never comes. “Okay, I’ll make your favorite ramen.” 

He feels the side of the couch dip, your hand settling on his chest. Your fingers were greedy like you couldn’t stop yourself from playing with the fabric or caressing his taut muscles. Your voice is gentler when you speak this time. “Do you want an ice pack? Some tea?”

You two have done this dance before. You come home to find him exhausted, overworked with a migraine that could tranquilize an elephant. And just like always, you carefully slip his shoes off and unbutton the sleek black jacket to his uniform. It’s hard for him to stay mad about anything when you’re this kind, this caring. 

“Satoru, please say something.”

“There’s nothing to say.”

Your voice was so gentle. So sweet, saccharine, and so fucking patient. A voice you only ever reserved for him and for his ears only. A gentle whisper carried in a gentle breeze. It was his favorite sound. 

But not tonight. 

So you try something else. Sweet kisses along the corner of his lips. You’re even bold enough to move his arm, the arm he was using to desperately block out any light or simulation. You kiss his eyelids, his forehead, and cheeks—feather-light. Your hand slides up his chest before reaching his face. You caress your thumb under his closed eyes, and your other hand finds his hair, gently massaging his temple. He has all of you. Every bit. 

“Let me take care of you.” If it were any other night, your breath fanning his neck would have shattered him; goosebumps would have wrecked his body, he’d shiver, and everything in him would ease, and all of his stress would slip away into nothingness. He never had to be the strongest with you. You would render him down to nothing but a simple man with just a few words. “You don’t look too good, honey. I’m sorry you’re not feeling well.” For a woman so strong in your own right, a woman of unyielding dignity and poise and unwavering determination to succeed, this is his favorite side of you. 

But not tonight. 

When his hand clasps your wrist, he feels your whole body freeze against his. Maybe you were surprised. Maybe you predicted this and were preparing yourself but-

The tongue-lashing dies in his throat when he opens his eyes. Just a peak to your face makes him falter. You were pouting. Worried. “I’m fine.” it’s harsher than you deserve but kinder than the thoughts swirling through his head a second ago. 

He’s agitated. Stuck in the same old system that continues to fuck him over—his students over. 

And yet, you just looked too beautiful. 

You pull away, finally taking the hint. Then, you stand, fully removing yourself from him and stepping away. Your body heat quickly disappears from where you once sat, and he quivers. The room was quiet once again. 

The room remained quiet even as you placed a hot bowl of ramen on the table beside him, a glass of water, and two pills. 

You slept alone that night. 

-

You remember when you first met Megumi. 

“Who the hell are you?” 

You never would have expected that to be the the words from a child you had just met. You raised a brow. “Well, aren’t you a fucking, brat?” 

You were different back then—colder, angrier. You were similar in that sense.

Oddly enough, maybe that’s what gravitated him to you.  

You’re not sure when it happened, but gradually, the harsh edges of you began to… change. Not entirely softened, as thorns remained, but you bloomed, red petals and all. You grew softer, kinder, more patient—and finally—your heart had made space for others. The fear of loss remained, but you had never cared for someone so fragile. No one had ever cried for you, reached for you with small chubby fingers, or depended on you as he once had. You never had someone in your life that needed to be nurtured, protected, and guided. 

He was just a boy. 

Over time, you realized that if you remained unchanged, perhaps he would never grow into the man he needed to be. You’re not sure why he picked you, why he looked up to you of all people, but he did. He found comfort in you and followed you like a little duckling with a little waddle and permanent scowl. 

There wasn't a rhyme or reason. He chose you, and you chose him. 

Soon enough, you were waking him up for school, running your hands through his messy, dark locks. You were making him bento boxes, running to parent-teacher conferences, and having hard but meaningful conversations with him in his room about his troubling behavior. 

Then you were hugging him as he cried, as he revealed the same dark thoughts you once had about yourself. 

You wished this world wasn’t so cruel, so dark. You hope that in a different life, he would have grown into a normal kid, with hopes and dreams and a list of things he wanted to do and go out and experience. You didn’t want him to be shackled to a world that’s left you so scarred.

You fought for any sense of normality you could give him. If that meant confronting the higher-ups, so be it. At times, you even confronted Satoru. 

He was just a boy. 

Fire never harmed you;  it never dared to scorch your skin. You commanded and held domination over nearly every flicker of heat. He was so small when you met him; you remember the first time you saw his small form shiver in the cold. It made you anxious. Despite buying him the heaviest winter coat you could find, you were beside yourself, always wondering—is he warm enough? 

But, long were the days of you bundling him up in his jacket, tying his shoes, and tugging beanies over his dark hair and red ears. Long were the days of you clasping his little hands in yours to bring them warmth when the air grew too bitter. He grew older, smarter, wiser, and stronger. The boy that used to cling to your skirt after a hard day at school now stood inches taller than you. 

You knew that one day he’d leave you, and you were okay with that. Seeing him so ready for the world made you happy. You worried—of course you still worried—but you were so proud. He was hesitant, unsure at times, and sometimes even looked back to you for assurance. 

You were always there, smiling, ushering him along. 

You can do it. I believe in you. 

You grew up together, you think. Sometimes, you wondered if he ever paid for your shortcomings, or if he remembered your failures as a caregiver, but just like you did him, he’d assure you with a soft nudge and a gentle smile. 

He knows you did the best you could with what you had.  

He was just a boy. 

Your boy. 

He wasn’t yours, but you loved him like he was. Only as he grew did you realize the lines you had crossed. 

He doesn’t remember his mother, but you’re sure he remembered her smile, perhaps her touch, or the sound of her laughter. You never meant to impose on her memory.

When it happened, he had just gotten into Tokyo Jujutsu High, and Satoru took him on his first official mission. You no longer had the means of pushing this off; you couldn’t beg Satoru or the higher-ups for another month, another week, another day. Megumi wasn’t a normal kid. He was a sorcerer and needed to start fulfilling his duties and mastering his technique.

“You can’t avoid the inevitable. You can’t protect him forever,” Satoru had once told you. 

You knew he was right. 

You stayed home that day, anxious and worried, but you knew Megumi would be alright. Satoru was with him. Even if the tall man was a bit harder on Megumi than you, you knew he’d keep him safe. 

However, your worst fears came to fruition. Megumi wasn’t the same after that mission. 

You remember. Satoru’s eyes were stern that night while Megumi's eyes never left the floor as he made his way to his room. 

You remember thinking—what could I do to make my boys happy again? 

After all, they were your everything, the reason you stood here now with a full heart. Things were newer for you and Satoru then, but he kissed you that night, warm, large hands gently holding your cheeks. He missed you a little bit extra that day. You were nervous, hesitant to fall into the sanctuary of his embrace, but it was only a matter of time until you were fully, devotedly his.

 “Are you okay?” You had asked, only for him to nod his head. 

“Yeah. Of course, I am, angel. Megumi is shaken up, but he’ll be alright too.” 

You made Megumi’s favorite dinner that night—the same beefsteak he’s raved about since he was only six. Well, he never raved, but you perfectly remember the first time you made it, which happened to be the first time he tried it. He could barely get his chin over the table to scope his food into his mouth. He wasn’t good with chopsticks yet, so he used a little fork, which he held in his tiny fist. His little eyebrows raised before dipping down, creasing at the inner corners as he concentrated on the flavor. He murmured it’s good, and you remember being so proud of yourself. That was one of the first times you felt that you were doing something right by him. You made the same dish on occasion, and time only helped you perfect the recipe. 

Megumi never came out of his room that night. The lights were off when you knocked. Even after hearing no response, you had cracked open the door, poking your head inside. 

“Gumiii,” you stepped into his room. He was on his bed, groaning as you flicked the light on. He turned his back to you. “I made your favoriteee.”  

You had sat on the edge of his bed, a hot plate of food in your hands. “C’mon, it’s the beefsteak you like. Nice and warm.”

“‘m not hungry,” he had grumbled. 

You sighed. “The mission must have been unpleasant.” He remained still. “I’m sorry, Gumi. Satoru said you did well! I’m proud of you—” he flinched from your touch, snapping his arm away from your reach. You froze, having felt the coldness of his rejection. “If you don’t want to talk about the mission, how was your first day at your new school?” You asked. “Do you have any classmates you like?”

“Just quit it already…” he had murmured. “I’m not in the mood.”

Your shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry. I just want to make sure you’re okay. My first mission was tough too, and you already know I wasn’t great at making friends either–” you winced, biting your tongue.  This was coming out all wrong. “… are you okay, Megumi?” 

“I’m fine!” He clipped, pushing himself upright in bed. “Just leave me alone and stop acting like you’re my mom already!”  

You remembered—and just the memory of that night shambled your heart. You could never forget the hurt those words caused and how you couldn’t show it. 

You had smiled wearily. Then, you placed his dinner on his desk. “…you’re right,” you echoed. “I’m not her, never could be. I’m sorry if I imposed. I never meant to.”

You never spoke of the incident, but you remembered that things were tense between Satoru and Megumi for a short while after that. You told Satoru to drop it, but you had a feeling the poor boy received a tongue-lashing from Satoru. You were never sure, though, and you could never prove it. 

You just remembered feeling cracks in the foundation of the home you never knew you had so carefully crafted, brick by brick. Some of the warmth was gone—a warmth you never knew was quite there until it wasn’t. 

Little by little, you pulled back. Megumi moved into the student dorms shortly after, and he needed you less and less. You no longer made him bento boxes or his favorite beefsteak. You bit your tongue with the lectures: Megumi, that’s not nice, or Megumi, you need to have more faith in yourself. You can do it.  

Though the bitter bite of cold never entirely touched you, heated by an unquenchable fame, you pulled back your hand when you reached for him. He left you seared—burned. 

You still worried. You never knew if you were giving him too much or not enough. So, you left most of the mentoring to Satoru now.  It’s been a few months since the incident, and now you only ever speak to him if he approached you first. 

That's why you were happy when you spotted him in town. You offered him a small, shy wave. He unexpectedly approached you and asked how you were and what you’d been up to. However, the most unexpected part was when he asked if you were busy. You shook your head, and it was impossible to hide you beam when he offered to get you hot chocolate from the same coffee shop you used to take him to after school in the colder months.

However, it seemed you weren’t the only one confused by Satoru’s recent behavior. 

“Huh?”

“Gojo didn’t want me going on my mission,” Megumi reiterated. 

You blink a few times, tapping your fingers against the styrofoam cup in your hands. “Huh. He’s never done that before.”

“He doesn’t think I’m ready. He took the mission himself.”

“He said that? That he doesn’t think you’re ready?”

“Well… not exactly.” He scowls slightly, looking down at the cup of hot chocolate. “But he damn well implied it.”

“Gumi,” you frown at the boy. He doesn’t make eye contact with you; he looks forward now, gazing out the window and watching the fresh snow coat the ground. 

He was upset. 

“He could’ve at least taken me with him.”

For a moment, you see that same little boy you met over ten years ago and that same dejected look on his face after being let down one too many times. It breaks your heart. 

“If Satoru took the mission and went alone, I’m sure it’s for a good reason.”

He wants to say more but opts for something quick and sweet. “Yeah. Maybe.”

You have to do something. Quick. Anything to make him a bit happier. “I have a mission later in Osaka. I’ll be catching the 2 pm train. Wanna come? I could use the extra help.” 

He’s quiet for a moment, thinking, you presume, but he nods. “Yeah, sure. I don’t have anything else to do.” 

“Great! And just so you know, we’ll probably be dealing with a grade one or two.” 

He pauses momentarily before calmly asking, “And you need help with that?”

“Uh, yeah. Any help is much appreciated. Plus, I haven’t seen you much recently.” You smile brightly, and he turns his head, eyes finding the ground, looking a little bashful. 

“About that…” 

“Don’t worry about it,” you wave him off. “You’ve been busy with school, and I know that.”

“But that’s not–”

“It’s okay, Megumi,” you smile again, resisting the urge to reach across the table and gently squeeze his hand. “I get it.”

He gives you a look, a small disgruntled scowl. He wanted to say more.

“Alrighty then.” You stand, stretching from sitting in the chair. “I’ll buy you another hot chocolate for the road. We should probably start getting ready to leave.”

-

The mission goes well. An abandoned warehouse in Osaka conjured up a nasty looking grade three, but Megumi held his own just fine—like you expected. He’s grown much stronger and more sure of himself. You’re proud. Seeing how far he’s come certainly puts a smile on your face. He’s not a little boy anymore, you realized. He’s growing into a fine young man. 

Urg. Stop getting emotional. 

However, after stopping for a later dinner, you both arrived home late, around nine or so. 

“You did good tonight, Megumi,” you tell him for the nth time. 

He rolls his eyes, tucking his hands deep into his pockets. “You’ve told me that already.”

“I know, I know. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m proud of you. You’re getting so much stronger.”

Instead of brushing you off like all the other times, he sighs before offering a forced “thanks.” 

“Alrighty then. Try and get some sleep, okay? I’ll see you and the others sometime tomorrow, yeah?”

“Sounds good. Get back home safe.”

You nod, smiling. You make sure to watch him as he goes, making sure he gets inside before turning around. He’s capable of taking care of himself, but some habits never grow old. Making sure he gets inside anywhere safely has always been something you’ve prioritized, whether he was going to a friend's house, school, or boarding the train. 

You loved him like your own, but you knew he wasn't. After all, it was only a few months ago now that he reminded you that he wasn't yours.

You’re not my mom. 

It hurt—it still does—but you never held it against him. You still loved him nevertheless. Your relationship might have shifted but it doesn’t negate the fact that you care for him and would gladly give your life if it meant keeping him safe. 

Then, there was Kugisaki and Itadori—two others slowly weaseling their way into your heart. They’ve helped Megumi so much; he might be too proud to admit it, but they’ve helped him come out of his shell; they were his friends, and you knew they had each other backs. 

You sigh, a translucent cloud of white floating up and above your head. Just like always, your thoughts shift to blue eyes. Satoru. You’ve missed him today. No calls or obnoxious spam texts. It’s not unusual per se, especially when he gets busy. Regardless, you missed him.

But, something is bothering you. He wasn't communicating with you and he usually tells you these things. Even if he didn't have the time to tell you something right away, he'd eventually find a moment to talk to you. This time around, he didn’t. He didn't tell you he was leaving or about the whole ordeal with Megumi.

He just got up and left. You woke to a cold bed and an empty house. No text message, no note with a silly doodle. When you called him in the morning, it went right to voicemail. Eventually, when you pull up your shared text messages to check for anything new, you only saw the message you sent him from the day before. At a loss, you type out a quick message. You didn't think it would make things better, but at least it was something.

I hope you have a good day today :) 

It was all you could really muster up after last night. He seemed so agitated, and so fed up. You blamed it on stress; he isn’t usually like that. Usually, his touch was careful, calculated as if you were fixed of glass. You missed his lame jokes and mischievous grins when he was up to no good. You weren't offered any of that last night. Or the night before. Even the night before that. 

You’re starting to worry. 

He always bounces back so quickly. The only thing that typically gets him this mad are the higher-ups. Which, in Megumi's case, makes sense. You can see why Gojo would intervene if they gave him a dangerous mission. 

But why didn’t he take Megumi with him, at least?

Hm.. maybe it was beyond Megumi's skill set. Would the elders be stupid enough to set him up? They did it to you long ago, but they wouldn’t be bold enough to do it to the boy with the ten shadows technique, would they?

Or maybe Satoru… just doesn’t want to be near you?

Urg. You roll your eyes at your own selfish thoughts. Satoru wouldn’t do something like that. He’s already overworked as it is. Maybe you should make him something. A nice dinner? Or maybe he needed a pick-me-up? Kikufuku? You’re sure you could find the recipe online. 

You're torn, so you decide to make both. Maybe you'll even put on a nice dress. 

You decide to call him, and after a few rings, he answers. “Hey, honey,” you say sweetly, happy he even bothered to answer your call. "I was wondering when you’d be home tonight. I want to make you a nice dinner.”

He’s quiet again—too quiet. “Dinner? Tonight?” 

“Yeah, you’ve been so busy lately. I figured you’d like that.” 

He hums into the phone, sounding a bit lighter. “Dinner does sound nice…” 

Your smile widens. You could hear the underlying stress in his tone; it was flatter than usual, but at least he was trying. “... I’ll even put on your favorite dress?” 

He chuckles a bit. “Tempting, but I’ll probably have to leave after dinner.”

“Oh,” you murmur, wincing slightly at the rejection. Maybe you’ve gotten too spoiled—too accustomed to him pushing off his responsibilities all for the sake of spending a few more moments with you. Were you being too greedy?  “Are you okay? They’re not stretching you too thin, are they?”

He sighs in a carefree tone. “I'm doing fine. Same old thing, just a different day,” is all he offers, but you can tell he’s withholding. 

“I can help, y’know,” you offer gently. “If you have too many missions, I can take a few off your plate.”

“Nah,” he tells you a bit arrogantly. “It’s better if I handle it.”

Now you’re really starting to feel the distance. He usually reserves the softer parts of him for you. You suppose he just didn’t have the patience to do so right now. “You, uh, got into it with the higher-ups I heard,” you mention, trying to keep the conversation going but approaching from a different angle. “Megumi was telling me you even took his mission. I think he was a bit upset you didn’t take him with you. How come you never told me?”

“How come you never told me you were going to Osaka? Or the fact that you took him with you?”

Your stomach twists, unease bubbling in your chest. You didn’t like where this was heading. “I– it’s never bothered you before,” you manage, though your voice falters, dying down into nothing but a whisper. “And it’s not like you’ve been… wanting to speak to me recently. I haven't had the time to tell you much of anything," your trail off, your voice slowly fading before you begin again. "Did I do something to make you mad?”

The silence that follows is unbearable—longer than you ever imagined it could be. “Satoru… Please just talk to me.”

“I gotta go,” his tone is cold, clipped, and final. 

There’s a click as he hangs up, and the silence becomes deafening and threateningly absolute.

-

You realize you miss the way he used to look at you. Not the way he'd gaze at you, but in the way he would gaze into you, as though you were ever the only thing that ever really mattered.

After your last conversation with him, you were unsteady. You hated how you stayed in bed for hours, analyzing everything he's said to you recently, dissecting his every action. You hated how needy you suddenly felt, even while laying there, in his bed, in his clothes. He paused just a second too long before answering you now, as if he had to must up the courage and energy to do so. His laugh no longer came out easily. Others might miss it, but you never could. It was still rambunctious, taking up a whole room, but to you, it felt forced, brittle even. You've known Satoru at his best, and you've also known him at his worst.

When he looks at you now, you wonder if he's really seeing you. Painfully, you realize you haven't seen him; not without his eyeband on at least. Last night you did, for the first time in a while, but he seemed agitated.

The worst part was that you didn't know how to bring yourself to confront him. You struggled, unsure which pretty words and cadence would unluck the distance between you two.

Did something happen on one of his missions? Was he stressed? Had the higher-ups pushed him too far, testing his patience?

Or was it you? Was this somehow your fault?

Did you scare him away? Have you said too much, cared too deeply, loved too loudly?

You weren't sure, but you had to try something.

You were grateful you were cooking him dinner tonight on your day off. It was the least you could do, and you adored taking care of him. You choose hot pot, something you and Satoru have tried at home before. It took over a few hours to prepare, but it was worth it. You made two broths, you sliced up shabu-shabu and wagyu beef and even went to the extent of watching a video to make a dipping sauce. Unfortunately, you forgot one of the ingredients for the kikufuku mochi and didn’t want to risk making something he didn’t entirely like. Luckily, you had spare time to run down to the kikufuku store right before it closed. Of course, you grabbed all his favorite, two boxfuls, in fact. He was a big guy, so you hoped you had more than enough food for him to indulge.

You and Satoru were together. Though he never outright asked you to be his, you knew. It was an unspoken thing, and you were content with that. For as goofy and eccentric as that man could be, it was rather surprising how he was never outright with what he was actually feeling. 

He was damn good at showing it, though. In more ways than one. 

You feel it in the way he’d always reach for you after a nightmare. Shaking, needy hands tightly clasping at your waste, fearful of you disappearing and slipping to a place where he could not reach you. Don’t ever go where I can’t follow. Please. His face would nuzzle into your neck, sharply inhaling your scent. You’d hold him, whispering endless promises. I’m here. I’ll always be here. Or it's okay. Breathe, my love. I’m with you. 

You feel it on the nights he’d pin you beneath him, his grunts and moans echoing in your ears as he fills you so completely. He’d beg, no demand you—tell me you’re mine. Only mine. 

And, of course, you’d eagerly nod, overwhelmed with the pleasure only he could strum out of you so perfectly. ‘m yours. All of me—yours. 

You feel it in his protective gaze, his eagerness to hold you in the life vest of his arms. You felt it late into the night, damp bodies pressed against one another; low lighting, quiet laughter, and secrets revealed. His dreams, his wishes, his what ifs—the parts of him that no one knew or considered. Or when he handed you a silver key with a handsome and cheshire grin. What do you say? He was lovely, every bit of him, especially his gentle and selfless heart that you would never take for granted like the rest of the world seemed to. 

You feel it when he comes home from overseas and how his strong arms hold onto you just a bit longer, a bit tighter. You feel it with how he smiles into your neck or that one time at the airport when he lifted you up and spun you around, uncaring who saw. 

You feel it in the way that it was unspoken. You feel it in his cursed energy and how it perfectly intertwined with yours, reaching for you, comforting you when his hands could not. You especially feel it in the necklace he gifted you—the one your fingers were playing with now: a silver chain with cerulean sapphires, the same breathtaking shade of his eyes. His cursed energy, carefully imbued into the stones, was like carrying a piece of him with you—always, wherever you may go, and it rests directly above your beating heart. 

He might not voice it, but you feel it. He loved you. And you certainly loved him. 

So when had it become so hard to reach him? Why does he seem so intangible all of a sudden? Something deep and unsettling blooms in your stomach. 

And now that you think about it…

When was the last time you two did any of that? When was the last time his careful hands caressed you?

Only Satoru could make you this worried or make you feel this displaced. A sense of panic strikes you, and you pull out your phone to text him when you realize he’s thirty minutes late. Usually, that wouldn’t bother you, but–

After only three rings, you're sent to voicemail. When you check his location, he’s at the high school. Should you check on him? Or would that make him… mad?

He toru! Dinners ready. When do you think you’ll be home? Miss you. 

You bite your lip. He quickly read your message, but those three little bubbles never show up. 

Nothing. Just nothing. 

Maybe he’s staying up late writing the report for his latest mission? 

“eek!” Your phone pings, and after a round of hot potato, you see he’s texted you back. 

Only to be met with more disappointment. 

Dealing with something urgent. Don’t wait up. 

You frown, knowing you should drop it, but you can’t. 

Satoru…

He’s typing faster now. What?

You pause, thumbs hovering over letters you hesitate to type. What’s going on? You’ve been off lately. 

I’m fine. Just busy. 

Do you want me to bring you dinner to the High School?

Those three bubbles appear and disappear more times than you can count. No. I said don’t wait up. 

You know I don't sleep well without you.

He responds in a heartbeat. It wouldn’t be the first time. 

Your patience is wearing thin for the first time since this ordeal started. Are you saying you won’t be coming home tonight? 

You’re offered no response. He doesn’t even open your message. For the second night, you lay in a cold bed. Except, Satoru doesn’t come home. 

Only he could fracture you so completely. 

-

During your next mission, you brought the whole trio along. According to the report you were handed, you were only dealing with a grade three, but there was also an Infestation in the area. You could use the backup.

You had initially asked Megumi, but once Yuji caught wind, he was adamant that he tagged along, and, according to Nobara she had nothing else better to do. 

“Are you guys sure? It’s your day off.”

Yuji shrugs, both arms up, hands up and behind his head. “Yeah, I’m game.”

“Me too,” Nobara voices with a small glint in her eyes. “I got something new I want to try out anyway. We didn’t get to go on a mission last week as it is.”

You paused. "Huh? Gojo didn’t take you on any?”

“Nah,” Yuji shakes his head. “I think he’s been busy or something.” He looks at Kugisaki. “Hasn’t Gojo-Sensei seemed a little… off?”

Nobara nods. “Uh yeah. He hasn’t been himself at all. We figured you’d know something,” Nobara says, curious eyes scanning you. 

“Huh… I’m not sure. We haven’t gotten around to talking lately.”

Megumi hums, though it sounds more suspicious than his usual passive tone. 

Though they weren’t necessarily your students, you figured there was no harm in taking them. You've done it before and having them around was always like a breath of fresh air—reminding you of why Satoru dedicates himself so fully to his cause and being a teacher. They give you a reason to get stronger and keep fighting. You loved these kids and all their bickering. 

Except, this mission doesn’t go anything like you had expected. The report was wrong—a grade two was ambling through the abandoned schoolhouse. That was fine; the four of you were more than enough to kill it. The infestation was a bit overwhelming, but you had their backs, and they were nothing but pesky small curses lower than a grade four. 

Everything went well when the ambush happens. You all saw it: right in front of your eyes, a grade one emerging from the shadows, born into something nasty. It's skin oozed a sickly black slime that clung to its misshapen body. Its face—or lack there of—was dark and amorphous, split by a jagged maw that stretched impossibly wide, revealing rows of sharp serrated teeth, ready to cut and slash through flesh like a meat grinder. Other that is daunting appearance, the only other notable thing about it was its speed.

You told the kids to back down, but it was already too late. They were already involved, stuck in the heat of battle and fighting as a seamless unite. They were more than capable of standing on their own. 

But you needed them out of here. Your obligation was to protect them no matter how eager they were to help. However, before you could think of your next move, the curse made one last self-preserving attack. It opened in wide jaws, releasing several red beamed energy blast aimed directly at stone pillars. 

You had no time to think, only react. In an instant, you surged forward towards the trio, faster than their eyes could react. Grunting, you knocked them back, glass shattering as you kicked them through a window. You felt the impact ripple through your body, fully knowing you knocked the wind out of Megumi and Yuji. However, they recovered quickly, their instincts sharp enough to catch Nobara–

Right in time before the building collapsed. 

The building groaned like a wounded beast, its entire frame buckling from lack of support. Stone walls crumbled into clouds of dust and debris, windows shattered in explosive bursts, steel beams twisted and snaped with sickening shrieks. The ground trembled violently as the structure gave way, collapsing into a chaotic heap of concrete, rubble, and smoke, swallowing everything beneath. Including you.

You survived. Reinforcing your body with cursed energy made you strong enough to withstand the impact, and your heavenly restriction certainly helped. Nevertheless, you still took on quite a bit of damage from the tons of metal and concrete.

You woke up under the rubble with a startling gasp, choking on the dust. Were you out for a few seconds? Minutes? You were unsure, but the only thing pushing you to stand was the panic coated in Megumi’s voice. He was calling for you, and so were the others. You could hear the strain in their voices, the utter distraught. You healed your broken leg and the gash on the corner of your forehead, ceasing your gushing blood. You gathered yourself and your strength before pushing. They found you quickly after that, noticing a heap of rubble moving. They ran, rushing to help you push back concrete that threatened to suffocate you. You never did like tight spaces. 

Thankfully, you were alright. The kids were safe as well.

However, the curse had escaped. Megumi was visibly shaken, his fingernail cracked, bruised, and bleeding from digging urgently through the rubble to find you. 

Everyone was on edge. It wasn't their fault you didn't react quickly enough. You were more than capable; maybe that's why the failure stung so much.

You let yourself down. You let them down.

You were spiraling into a dark place quickly. The guilt threatened to swallow you whole. Gojo was still nowhere to be seen. You didn't have the strength to call him. You’re not sure what you could even say. You’ve fucked up before, but never to this extent. Not to where a whole building collapsed. 

“Good morning. A tragic incident occurred last night when an abandoned school collapsed around 7 pm. Authorities are currently investigating the cause, and preliminary reports suggest that the collapse could have been due to a structural weakness—one of the many reasons why the school was abandoned in the first place. We will continue to monitor the situation as more information becomes available–"

Megumi gently grabs your phone and locks your screen. Wordlessly, he shakes his head before pocketing your device. You’re too exhausted to ask for it back. 

“Are you sure you’re okay, Sensei?” Yuji's voice was soft, the first voice to break the ice. You look up from your hands, unsure how long you’ve been lost in thought. You force a small smile as you gaze at the three kids. You were sitting across from them in the waiting area outside the council room. 

“I’m alright. Are you guys?"

“We’re all fine,” Megumi cuts in quickly. “We’re– we’re more than okay.”

“That's good,” you trail off. “That's really good.”

Uncertainty hung dangerously in the air. What happened now? You were okay, but for how long? 

You knew you were in for a lashing with all the collateral damage you caused. It was supposed to be a simple mission. This wasn't supposed to happen. You four were fine, but did anyone else get hurt? 

You flinch at your own thought. You don't think you could live with yourself if innocent lives were lost.

“Sensei?” Yuji's soft, unsure voice cuts in once more. When your eyes make contact, he smiles brightly. You can tell it’s forced. “After this, wanna go get something to eat? There’s this great sandwich shop down the street!”

“Y–yeah!” Nobara sits up straight after being less than conspicuously nudged by Yuji. “It’s pretty good. We went the other day–”

The council room door creaked open. The higher-ups were waiting, shrouded in shadows and faces hidden. Even if you couldn't see them, the tension was palpable. Even without seeing them directly, you could sense their anger, smell it as it rolled off of them in a quiet, unspoken fury. You glance at the kids once more, this time with a gentle, reassuring smile curling at your lips. 

Everything would be okay.  

-

Everything was, in fact, not okay. 

The air was heavy as you entered your office. Your limbs ached, your head throbbed, and every breath felt like dragging glass through your lungs. You had thought the worst of it was over, and slowly, you felt your body begin to shut down, but only when there were no prying eyes to see how you compensated for your injuries. Even after using RCT, you had a limp—your bones were mended but not quite right. Your head was no longer bleeding—but still, you weren't quite right. 

You dismiss it as exhaustion; after all, you had just learned RCT not too long ago. Maybe you missed something. However, this wasn’t anything you couldn't handle on your own. You could see Shoko, but why bother her? You’ve endured far worse. Dealing with a sore body and a headache for the next few days wasn’t out of your jurisdiction. 

When you open the door, a flickering lamplight reveals a tall frame standing by your desk. Even before your eyes dance upon his sharp and still silhouette, the air shifts—your soul already knows he is there. Satoru.

But, his eyes never meet yours; you weren’t blessed enough to see them, a bright blue illuminating in the absence of light. His eyes were covered with a familiar dark cloth. However, you didn’t need to see them to know that the usual warmth they held as he gazed upon you was gone. In its place was a coldness that turned your stomach.

“Satoru–”

“I know,” he says, voice clipped as he turns to face you. “I read the reports.” Your heart sinks as he haphazardly tosses the report down to your desk. 

You’re exhausted, unsure of where to even begin. So many questions floated in your weary mind. Where were you? When did you get here? Please, don’t be mad at me. 

It’s funny how all your dignity, poise, and strength to endure are gone with him. You already took one berating from the elders, and you’re not sure you could handle another. 

Not from him. 

“But, I want to hear it from you.” He stepped closer, his height making him all the more domineering. “What happened out there? And how the hell are my students caught up in all of this?”

“The report was wrong. It was a grade two, not three, but we handled that just fine. We cleared out the area and completed the mission, but we were ambushed. A grade one appeared, destroyed the pillars, and–” You hesitate, unable to form the words. “Well, you know what happened.” He’s quiet, too quiet for your liking. “I–I did everything I could, Satoru. The students were fine, but the curse got away.”

“Everything you could?" His voice echoes. "I don’t need excuses. Certainly not from you. You endangered them—all of them. They’re not even your students!” He snapped, his voice rising in a way you’ve never heard before.

You bite back the lump forming in your throat. “I thought you, out of anyone, would understand the circumstances.”

“...Understand?” He utters back, a quiet fury rolling off him in waves. 

 “I made sure that–”

“You failed,” he snaps, voice laced with malice. “Enough. Just stop it. You were reckless and went behind my back, and you let a pathetic grade one get the best of you.”

Your chest tightened, crumbling at the weight of his tone. “Went behind your back? I did no such thing.”

“They could have been hurt because of you!” You visibly flinch, his words carrying more weight than the debris that had buried you—broken bones and all. 

“I’m recommending you be demoted to grade two.” 

What?

“You can’t do that. Satoru, you can’t–”

“I can,” he said coldly. “and I will. You failed, and not only did you fail, you went behind my back and involved my students. Your recklessness caused this,” disdain coats his voice, and he sucks his teeth. “I was gone for two fucking seconds, and you damn near ruined everything. People could have died. My students could have been injured. So stop being a nuisance and just do as you're told from here on out.”

No. 

No, no, no, no. 

You fought for years to get to grade one. A woman with a name of no renown—this society was never in favor of you; the system was set up for you only to fail time and time again. For years, you were held at grade three, then grade two, all because of your name’s sake—all because you were a woman. You didn’t have the luxury of being as good as other sorcerers; you had the burden to be better. 

Even now, at grade one, they continue to undermine you and undervalue you. You knew you didn’t have room to make mistakes, for they would tarnish every bit of good you have done. You thought Satoru understood that. You thought he viewed you as an equal, someone strong enough to stand by him. You thought he valued you, respected you. 

You never thought a mistake, a stupid mistake, would lead to this. 

It’s not fair. It’s not fucking fair. 

“This has nothing to do with my rank. You don’t believe me. You don't trust me. After everything–”

Hearing his scornful laugh, your vision begins to blur. “Don’t make this personal. You fucked up, and now I have to clean up your mess.”

Your ears begin ringing. The pounding in your head becomes too much and threatens to crack your skull open once more.

“But it is, isn’t it?” You whisper. How could it not be personal with how he's been treating you for days? “You haven't been able to look at me in weeks. You speak to me as if I’ve become nothing but a burden to you—a nuisance. What did I do to deserve this?”

He remains silent, the muscles in his jaw ticking as he grits his teeth. Point proven.

Your heart painfully twists with each beat. “Do you even… care about me anymore?” You’re not sure why you say it, why the words slip past your lips, but they do.

He read the report and he hadn't even asked if you were okay. Maybe it was a selfish thought, but it makes your chest ache. You just wanted to go home, crawl in bed and hold him. However, you knew that wasn't in the cards right now.

“Don’t twist this into something it’s not.”

Your voice finally wavers before him, cracking as you press on, desperate for him to understand—desperate to have him by your side as he has been for so many years.

“You’re casting me aside like I’m... worthless."

It was cruelty, a quiet and deafening insult for him to demote you of your status—but more specifically, your place beside him. That hurt runs deep, to the point that feelings of betrayal start seeping into your veins, poisoning you, antagonizing you. Belittling you. It was a sharp dagger you never expected—searing with a hatred that threatened to cripple you. This wasn’t just about your position. He was a man of unchallenged stature, of the highest status and regard, lowering you, demeaning you with his every word, every action. 

When did things go so wrong?

Yet, even now, you question yourself. Were you being dramatic? Were you taking this too personally? Were you being selfish?

Because he was right. Every word he's said so far was right. You failed. You put them in danger.

You stand there, a hollow feeling growing in your chest. The sting of Satoru’s words cut deeper than any blade you’ve faced. His jaw tightened, his gaze hard as steel and cold as ice. “You gave me what I never asked for.”

“Don't you dare!” You snap, finger trembling as you point his way with an accusatory jab. “Don’t you dare pretend this is nothing.  You know me better than anyone. How could I not take this personally? I’ve done nothing but stand by you, love you, trust you–”

“Like I said, I never asked for any of that,” he utters sharply, his carefully composed exterior shattering. “Whatever we were was nothing more than fucking convenience.” 

Suddenly, he stops, freezing at the onslaught of his own lethal words. His next words seemed to die in his throat. The damage was done. 

Exhausted, defeated, numb. His words hit you like a death blow. “... Convenience?” Echoing the very word that came from his lips—a sound you hardly recognize comes from your mouth, a small slip of the anguish tormenting and swelling in your body escapes. 

The necklace around your neck, the very one he had given you, seemed to pulse against your skin, warm and alive. It carried a piece of him, a piece of you, a guiding hand in the absence of light: a thread, an anchor—a way home. 

Suddenly, you hated it. Hated the way it sat so close to your heart, hated the warmth, his energy; you hated that, even now, his words cutting so deep, unraveling the fabric of your being, it comforted you, reaching for you. 

You yanked it off, the chain snapping in two as you held it in your trembling hands. 

He falters, his whole being frozen. “What are you doing?” he asked, quiet and tense, blanketed in uncertainty. 

“I don’t want it,” you say, voice quivering, threatening to fail you at any moment. His energy—the only energy that blended so perfectly with yours—reached for you, and so did his trembling hands. Reflexively, you flinched away, retreating further into the room and further from him. “Don’t,” you shake your head. “Don’t touch me. Not with your hands, not with your energy. Don’t.”

Silent tears stream down your face. You are unable to look at him, and your breathing is shallow and unsteady. You open your hand, letting the necklace drop to the floor. The faint sound of metal hitting wood echoes in the suffocating silence of the room. 

There’s a soft knock on the door. It creaks, slightly opening. “... Y/n sensei?” came an unsure voice.

You stiffen, and suddenly, you can sense them, three nervous students standing outside your door. Too caught up with Satoru, you had entirely missed them. You clear your throat and dry your cheeks with the back of your hand before turning to the door. You walk over, opening the door wide enough to see them. 

“Sorry if we’re interrupting, but we just wanted to know if you still wanted to come out for dinner with us...” 

Fuck. How much did they hear?

You take a breath, and it’s shakier than you anticipated. “Yeah, sure. That sounds nice. Let me grab my jacket, okay.”

Yuji only offers an unsure smile. Norbora has a hard time even looking at you, while Megumis's eyes are solid and unyielding, glaring right past you. His hands were in his pockets, balled into tight fists.

You don’t know what to do other than quickly turning. Within a few ushered strides, you were at your desk, grabbing your coat off your desk chair; you’re careful to avoid Gojo, who manages to plaster on that big fucking grin. 

“Heard you guys were up to no good while I was away.”

“We were fine,” Megumi interjects before Yuji could open his mouth. “More than fine.” 

“Y–yeah, everything ended up being just fine. Y/n-sensei made sure of that,” Nobara awkwardly adds, shifting her weight on her feet. 

“Ah,” Gojo nods. “Well, make sure you get some rest tonight. We’ve got a long day tomorrow! You guys will be training with the second years!” 

You hated how he could act as if everything was alright while you were fighting back tears. It was another jab, a suckerpunch to the gut. 

You just needed to get out of there. 

-

After dinner with the kids, you headed out on your own the following day. You went home, stuffing some clothes in a bag before spending the night at a cheap motel. Before getting with Satoru, you always floated from place to place, never truly settling. Those days, all you carried on you was your backpack. You didn’t have a home or many possessions you could call your own. You just had yourself.  

I guess old habits die hard. 

Megumi was the first to text you: I went to Gojo's house today and didn’t see you. 

All good! I’ve been busy running errands.

Nobara text you sometime after.

Hey Sensei!! Let me know if you’re available today! Let’s go shopping!

You responded rather quickly. Sorry, I’m not around today. Maybe ask Maki? Or maybe Yuji and Megumi would like to tag along.

But guys suck :(

Then, there was Yuji: Hey, Sensei! Let me know if you want ramen! The gang and I got you since you covered for us the other night! I even got coupons! 

You weren’t sure what to say. You always covered for their meals (no exceptions), but you knew they were just trying to be kind. You double-tapped and hearted the message. 

You appreciated them more than anything, but frankly, it was a bit embarrassing. You never meant for them to overhear you and Satrou that night in your office, and you were never one for pity. If it were anyone else, you would have called them out and told them off. However, you wouldn’t dream of doing that to the kids. They were trying to support you in the only way they knew how, but it wasn’t their responsibility to worry about you. 

Surprisingly, Shoko was the next person to contact you. You never stopped by my office. I’m assuming you’re alright?  

Smiling gently, you responded. Yeah, no injuries to report. 

A building collapsed on you.

You scoff, imagining her deadpan expression. Heavenly restriction, remember?

That doesn’t mean you can’t get hurt. 

Your thumbs hover over the keyboard. Yeesh. Just meet me at the bar you like downtown. 

That’s where you are now, Shoko’s favorite bar, tossing back your third shot. ”Take it easy. I don’t feel like dragging you home tonight.”

“Ah. I’m alright, Shoko.”

“You don’t look it.” 

“Neither do you with those bags under your eyes.”

She brings her drink to her lips, mumbling “touché” before taking a swig. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Vivid memories pressed to the front of your mind of the building collapsing. “Satoru is demoting me. After the elders ripped into me, I found him waiting for me in my office.”

“He– what? Jeez,” she took another sip of sake. “Out of everything, I didn’t expect that.” 

“I– we haven’t been doing too good. I’m not sure if there even is an us after last night.”

“Huh. He did seem a little out of it today.”

“Somehow, I kinda doubt that.” There’s a beat of silence, and you swirl the liquid in your cup. 

“If it means anything, he asked me about you. Asked if you were alright.” 

You smile a bit sardonically.  If Satoru really wanted to find you, you knew he could, as he had the means to do so. From here, you were only about five miles away from his estate. It’s not like you were too for his eyes to see.  Suddenly, that thought bothers you, and you find yourself almost subconsciously concealing your cursed energy.  

“Is that why you texted me?”

She gives you a weird look. “Partially. I had my own concerns.” 

“Like what?”

“If I’m being honest with you, you’re not great at RCT. I wanted to check and make sure everything was alright. It eventually catches up with you if you don’t do it correctly. I’ve seen it cause irreparable damage before.”  

“Ah. I guess that makes sense.”

“You should come to my office tomorrow so I can check–”

“I think I’m gonna quit.”

“…what?”

“I mean, that’s what they really want, right?”

“If you do that, they’ll find the easiest excuse to label you as a traitor. A cursed user.”

“Don’t you think I know that? Since day one, they’ve been trying to paint me as a villain.” 

“So don’t give them what they want,” Shoko bites back. She pinches the bridge of her nose with her thumb and index finger. “Listen, I can’t stop you. You are going to do what you want to do at the end of the day, but you don’t need to do this. You made a mistake.”

“I’m just tired,” you tell her truthfully. “For months, I’ve been pretending, going through the motions. I've been miserable. Megumi hasn’t wanted me around much. He’s older now, and he doesn’t need me anymore–”

“Of course he does,” Shoko cuts you off. “He’s still a kid.”

“And I’m not his mother,” you retort bitterly. “Then, there’s Satoru. He’s been so distant.  He used to always be in my corner and make everything better, but I don’t even have that now. Now, all of the jujutsu society thinks I’m a liability. He thinks I’m a liability. Maybe it’s why he’s grown to resent me so much.”

“Please. Just stop talking,” Shoko remarks, overwhelmed with how quickly you were talking. She wasn’t necessarily a fan of conversations like these, but at least she listened. “I’m here if you ever need anyone. And please, don’t let this fester. I would rather not lose another friend.” She takes a large gulp this time, finishing her drink before gesturing for a refill. “Tsk. Satoru is complicated—I get it—but he wouldn’t want you to leave. Neither would Megumi. That kid loves you. Maybe you and Gojo just need a break.”

A break? Ha. That was one way of putting it. However, it already felt much more like a breakup, and its permanence frightened you. Like many other things in your relationship, it was never voiced but certainly felt. 

“Yeah,” you say softly, body buzzing as you down your fourth shot. “Maybe you’re right.”

-

You start walking home after having drinks with Shoko. It was a long walk, and you took your time. You weren’t in a rush to head home to potential chaos. The thought of staying at a hotel crossed your mind, but you had nothing to change into. Frankly, it didn’t matter where you went either. It’s not like you’d be able to sleep any better. 

Though, it’s not like you were going back home to anything good. You were suspended without pay; you couldn’t go near the school grounds or exercise any curses—a stipulation you rolled your eyes at. If they thought just a few measly words would stop you from exercising a curse, they would be more idiotic than you thought. 

Still, maybe it’s good to take some time off. Maybe you should stay at the hotel. If you were lucky, they’d have a washer and dryer. 

Then, your phone starts to ring—a unique ringtone that a white-haired idiot assigned to his contact one day after you let him “borrow” your phone. He even changed his contact photo; years later, you never had the heart to change it. 

Your heart aches when you see the contact photo of him, his goofy smile and gorgeous eyes peeking over his black shades. You answered hesitantly after a few rings. 

“Hello?”

“Heyyy,” you hear, his voice light and cheery yet, lacking its usual spark. “Where are you? I know I missed dinner the other night so I picked up your favorite on my way home!” 

Back to normal? Just like that?

You take a breath, reeling in your emotions. It wasn’t normal, per se, but you could tell he was trying, stepping cautiously over the ice he knew could shatter at any moment. 

“I’m not home, right now.”

“Huuuh?” You can hear the slight whine in his voice, and you can imagine him pouting like a small child. You expect him to carry on with his theatrics, but he hesitates. “When do you think you’ll be home then?”

“Uh, I don’t really know,” you trail off, unable to keep up his faux mirth and bravado. 

 “Well, if you don’t want to sleep next to me tonight, I can just take the guest bedroom!” For a moment, he sounds hopeful.

Honestly, he’s just making your head spin. 

“Honestly, I think it’s best if I stay out of the house for a little while, Gojo.”

There’s a beat of silence before you hear his nervous laughter. “Gojo?” he remarks dejectedly. “Can’t remember the last time you called me that.”

You were unsure what to say; you hadn’t even realized you initially referred to him by his last name until he pointed it out. You want to tell him sorry—for everything, but your tongue tenses in your mouth, and your throat threatens to close up. You hated it when he got like this, and typically, you’d do anything to make him smile again. 

But you’re hurt, and he caused that hurt. 

“I wanted to talk to you about the other day,” he adds quickly, unable to withstand your silence. 

“What’s there to talk about?” You ask softly. “What done is done. I messed up.”

He’s quiet for a moment. “You’re right. It can’t be undone now. But that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Your stomach drops your heart twists and aches. Was he going to officially end things with you? A bitter, more cruel half of you whispers—you weren’t even officially together to begin with. However, none of that even matters; he has too much of you, too many pieces of your frail heart in the palm of his hands. You were irrevocably his, but was he ever yours? 

Just a few weeks ago, you thought you would have an entirely different answer than the one you have now. You're too afraid to face him or the truth. You were guilt-ridden, your pride and dignity torn to shreds. Hearing that he no longer wishes to be with you would be too much. 

Honestly? 

You’re not sure how you’d react. If you’d sob, if you’d remain stoic, or if you’d flip a table and trash every one of your possessions. You’re at wit's end, and the level of fallout threatening to break free from you was immeasurable. 

So, you finalize what you had been contemplating just five minutes ago. “I think I’m going to stay at a hotel, Gojo. I need space. Time to think.” 

“I don’t want us to go to bed mad at each other,” he says lowly, his voice reverberating through the phone. You shiver. “It doesn’t feel right.”

You hated this. You fucking hated this. 

Your chest tightens, and your knees weaken. You wanted to give in. He always had that power over you. He ruled your heart so effortlessly. You yearned for him, your heart singing a million love songs, beckoning him back to you. 

But you couldn’t. You were too mad. You felt cast aside as if you were nothing but an afterthought—after all these years. Yet again, you feel the foundation of your home cracking, and your knees go weak yet again. You take a shuddering breath right before repeating the exact words he threw at you just a few nights prior—words that so effortlessly dismantled your spirit. “It wouldn’t be the first time.”

-   

You’ve always had a habit of running. It was easier for you than most. You figured you’d go back to that cheap motel in Tokyo, but you were too restless. Too angry. Feelings of betrayal ran deep, and the guilt nipped away at you until there was only a void. 

Before you could leave, though, you call a number you knew by heart. Stepping onto the train and holding your phone to your ear, it rings. For a moment, you assume he’s asleep. It was getting late, but after the fifth ring, the line clicked. A groggy voice peaks through. 

“Sensei? What’s going on?”

“Megumi,” you breathe out. “Hi. Sorry to wake you.”

“It’s fine.”

“Nozomi 1, departing from Tokyo and heading to Kyoto, will depart shortly. Please be careful of your footing while boarding. Please refrain from using mobile phone inside the train–“

“You’re leaving?” The tiredness in his voice is replaced by something else you can’t quite place. 

“Only for a short while. It’s not like I’ll be working anytime soon,” you chuckled nervously. “But I just wanted to let you know. It didn’t feel right leaving without speaking to you first.” 

“Oh,” is all he can muster up at first. “I– when will you be back?”

“I’m not sure,” you answer him honestly. “A few days, maybe.” 

“Well… Can we visit you? I’d go alone, but I think Yuji and Nobara would kill me if I did.” 

Oh. You hadn’t expected that. You close your eyes, taking a deep breath. “Um, yeah. When I figure out where I’m staying, I’ll let you know.”

He sounds worried. “You don’t know where you’re staying yet?”

You snicker. “Ha, this is, uh, kinda an impromptu thing.” 

“… and you’re sure alright?”

“Yes, yes, I’m alright. I just wanted to tell you.”

You can tell he’s not exactly satisfied, but he isn’t one to stop you. “Well, text me where you’ll be staying in a few hours. You should probably hang up now, though, and figure it out.”

You smile softly to yourself. He always was a kind boy—kinder than he’d ever reveal. “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Goodnight, Megumi.”

“Night.. I’ll call you later. Be safe.”

When you hang up, you feel a bit better. 

- 

The first night was hard—really hard. Sleeping away from Satoru was incredibly difficult, but so were his sharp words that relentlessly bounced around in your mind.  You found no peace by your window, watching the last of that day's sunlight slipping away behind the horizon, casting long shadows over the dead trees covered in snow.

You could almost feel his presence, like the cast of your shadow on a wall—following you, mirroring your every move. Your phone never rang with his ringtone, your phone never buzzed with a new text. Yet you stared at the shadows for a bit longer, a bit more intensely, waiting for two blue eyes to illuminate the space. They never did. 

Kyoto's stillness seemed to reflect your own, waiting for something to change, waiting for something dead and wilted to bloom once more. 

However, even all the way over in Kyoto, bad luck seems to follow you like the plague. You were walking to a small corner market to grab something to eat when you felt the disturbance in the air—tasted it on your tongue. You hoped that surge of cursed energy wasn’t what you thought it was. You would have loved to be proven wrong, but your instincts were keen like a hound trained to hunt. 

A curse womb opened right above a Kyoto High school. 

You were definitely getting fired after this. 

You knew a cursed object was most likely responsible for this. Considering it happened at a school, you were more than willing to bet a strong cursed object was placed there, most likely intended to ward off any other strong curses that might otherwise appear in the area. You assumed the seal broke, probably after hundreds of years of suppressing the power of the object. You’ve dealt with a case like that before.

You couldn’t have been more wrong. 

Three stupid students—ghost hunting of all things—removed the seal. The decorated white cloth tightly wrapped around a black skull was torn, and its viscous cursed energy soared, tinting the sky black. 

“Oh, you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” you hissed under your breath when you slammed open the classroom door. “This way, c’mon!” You didn’t have to tell them twice. Book it, and you stay by their side for as long as you can. You had to put up your veil, but only after they were far enough. 

You got impatient, however, especially towards the kid who had been recording everything up until now, where you crushed his phone in your hand. 

“Wha– hey! You're gonna pay for that!”

“What the hell is more important? Recording or your fucking lives? Shut up and run!” 

The air suddenly cracks with a tension that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. It’s here. You could feel it—the dark, oppressive presence creeping across the courtyard, lurking. You yourself could see it with your eyes, but you felt it. 

Your senses were better than most. It was partially why you and Yuji got along and trained together so well. You were just like him when you were younger. Granted, he wasn’t born with cursed energy like you were, but your heavenly restrictions were nearly identical. 

You stop running when you reach the edge of the courtyard, but those three kids carry on in a scram. Holding the cursed object in your hands, you raise the skull in the air. It takes a considerable amount of force, but you crush the skull, black dust coating your hand. There’s a hollow screech, and you hope that’s the end of it. 

Of course, your bad luck persists. 

Typically, destroying the cursed object that’s created a cursed womb kills it or at least nullifies it. The exception is when the curse is an S-grade; those wombs are damn near impenetrable. 

Destroying the object seemed only to irritate the curse as it began crawling out of a bloody sac. 

You hold up your fist, index, and pointer finger together, pointing to the sky along with your thumb. A crimson veil pours down, covering the entirety of the school. However, you sense three others within your veil just as you seal off the area. 

“Yo, Y/n sensei!! What the hell are you doing here, loca!” A deep laugh echoes across the courtyard. 

Christ. You knew that voice from anywhere. 

You glance over your shoulder and see a few unexpected faces. Utahime and two other students—Miwa and Todo who looks way happier than he should be, considering the circumstances. 

The newly born curse loomed menacingly overhead, its red eyes gleaming like coals in a dying fire. It was tall, with protruding joints that snapped into place. Its black and sleek hair extended beyond its long, contorted body. Its face was painted white and cracked as if crafted of aged porcelain. Its kimono was white, stained with splashes of red and black goo. You stood firmly in place, fire crackling at your fingertips, your breath steady but sharp in the cold night air. Todo and Miwa joined your side quickly, and Utahime offered you a firm nod from the sidelines. She was entrusting you with her students.  

Quickly, the courtyard became a battlefield, filled with the crackle of burning energy and the hum of raw power. 

The curse lunged, zipping through the air. You were faster, your body twisting and moving with fluid grace. You raised your hand to strike, a jet of flame bursting forward, crackling against the air. The curse shrieked as the fire seared its back, black smoke rising from its melted skin. 

It recovered too quickly for your liking. It rolled through the flames like water through a sieve, reforming and lunging again, its claws gleaming.

Your senses were on fire—every shift in the air, every sound, every movement was magnified. You could hear the heartbeat of the curse, the faintest tremor of its form as it coiled to strike. You could smell the thick, sour scent of decay that clung to it like an ancient smog. And you could feel it—the deep, heavy weight of power pressing down on you, making your muscles tighten and strain against the oncoming attack.

The curse moved to strike again, but you were already there, rolling beneath it, body twisting in a perfect arc, and feet hitting the ground in a spring-loaded motion that sent you leaping upward. Your fist, wreathed in fire, crashed into the creature’s chest.

The explosion of heat sent the curse reeling, but it was only a momentary distraction. It retaliated, slashing the air with a massive, clawed hand. Three energized strikes were headed your way. You reacted with seconds to spare, but Miwa stood directly in the line of fire. You knew her simple domain wouldn’t be summoned fast enough, but she didn’t. It would be a miscalculation that ended her life. 

The claws tore through your side, then whipped down in a sickening arc, ripping clean through your arm. The pain came in an instant—a blinding, searing agony that burned through your body. You didn't even have time to scream.

You staggered back, a cry escaping Miwa’s lips as she looked at the bloody stump where your arm used to be. Blood poured and squirted from the wound, but there was no time for that. 

"Get back!" you shouted to the blue-haired girl, voice raw. She wasn’t nearly ready for this; Utahime gravity overestimated her abilities or underestimated the cursed strength. Regardless, the girl was too distraught to do anything at this moment. 

There’s a rush, and you suddenly realize you are outside the heat of battle. Todo went in, guns blazing, but you could only waste so much time. Todo was strong, way above his current ranking, in your opinion, but it was only a matter of time before that curse cut him down, too. 

Without a second thought, you dropped to your knees. The pain was overwhelming, but you focused, drawing from the reserves settled deep within your core. Your energy surged, and tendrils of fire spiraled around the wound, filling the air with intense heat. 

“Sensei! Are you alri–" Miwa gasped, her feet coming to a haunt as she watched in awe and terror as your arm began to regenerate—pulsing with energy. The flesh knitted itself together, bone and sinew reforming in a frenzy. 

But the process wasn't easy and certainly didn’t come without a price to pay. Your body screamed, the regeneration draining your reserves. You were already weakened, and the battle had just begun. Tsk. 

Todo found his way back over to you two, panting heavily. “How are you doing over there, Sensei?”

"Clap," you say, voice strained. "Now." He looked at you, bug-eyed, but he nodded. He didn't hesitate. 

He brought his hands together in a sharp clap, and everything shifted. “Alright! Let’s dance!”

In an instant, you found yourself on the other side of the curse. You inhaled deeply, heart pounding, immediately launching yourself back into the fight.

The curse roared in confusion, disoriented, but it was too late. You were already in motion. Your feet hit the ground in a fluid motion, and with a vicious snap of your wrist, fire erupted once again. This time, it formed into a massive whip of flame that lashed through the air.

The curse hissed as the whip wrapped around its neck, and you pulled with your whole body. Never losing your grip, muscles straining, you move forward, wrapping the flames over your arm again and again, pulling tighter and tighter until you smelt the pungent odor of the burning flesh around its neck. You wrapped the whip around your arm one last time before turning your body and pulling the whip from over your shoulder, viscously yanking and slamming the curse to the ground and into submission. 

The curse struggled, its body writhing, but it was weakened. Miwa went for the opening, summoning her New Shadow Style: Simple domain. She’s gotten better since the tournament, and you acknowledge with a grave chuckle as she instantly draws her blade, slicing the curse directly across its chest cavity. She cost you an arm, but deep down, you knew she had the conviction to win and succeed. 

Todo doesn’t wait. Another clap. Another shift. You and Todo swapped places with the curse itself this time, and the curse had no time to react. He goes for a punch, cracking the curse with a quick jab, followed by a right hook. He claps again. The moment the curse materialized in front of you, disoriented, you surged forward, throwing everything you had left into one final strike.

It twisted in anguish, its body crumbling to the ground before its remains turned into ash.

Then, there was nothing.

The air grew still. The ground beneath you is scorched but calm. You sucked your teeth, silently berating yourself. 

You hated using your technique. Frankly, you opted not to unless you absolutely needed to, which was the main reason why people hardly knew about it. It wreaked havoc, leaving nothing but indomitable infernos that refused to be quenched like normal flames. They left nothing destruction in their wake—hungry to consume and spread. However, you’ve gotten better at controlling it—you’ll give yourself that. The only thing burned here today was the grass in the courtyard. 

You stood there for a moment, panting, your body trembling with exhaustion as you collapsed to the ground, panting heavily. “Y–you did it!” Miwa cheered. “I had no idea you knew RCT. Thank you for helping me back there.”

“What the– Miwa, we won! Show some conviction!” Todo cut in, flexing his biceps. 

“He’s right,” you managed a weak smile as you worked on catching your breath and easing your fast-beating heart. You collapse to the ground, still gaining your breath. "We did it."

You hear footsteps approaching from behind. Tilting your head, you see Utahime standing directly above you. 

“Oh. Hi ‘hime.” 

She smiles a bit, but her face remains hardened. You straighten up a bit, catching on to her attitude. Something wasn’t right. 

“You guys did a good job. However, another problem has arisen across the city.” 

“Huh? Another one?” Miwa asked, brows tugging inward. She shifts her weight from one hip to the other. “That's like the fifth one today...”

They continue on in their conversation as you drop your veil, sniff the air, and concentrate on your surroundings. A sense of foreboding strikes you under the dark ambiance of the sky. Even after killing that S-grade, things don’t feel right. 

“Thanks for joining us,” Utahime says, drawing back your attention. “I nearly had to call for backup.”

You scoff, glancing up at her from the ground. “Something doesn't feel right, Utahime.” She nods, agreeing with your observation. “When did the reports come flooding in?”

“About an hour ago now.”

“Hm,” you wonder, thinking back to when you first found the cursed womb. “That’s about the same time I first sensed the presence of the cursed womb. They’re most likely connected.”

“That's what I thought. The presence of the cursed womb must have irritated some of the curses in the city, most likely because they were drawn to the energy fluctuations the cursed womb caused. It's good you were here. We're stretched thin right now. If you don’t mind staying, we could use your help. The other students are out on missions across the city, and things just keep getting worse.” 

You smile up at her before pushing yourself back up on your two feet, brushing the dirt from your pants. “Sure, let’s get going–” but as you stand, it feels as if a bolt of lightning strikes you down or as if your chest has been cracked open by a sledgehammer. The agony was too great to even scream as you fell to your knees and crashed back into the ground. 

It was lights out. 

-

It was quiet. Dark—a vast, unending expanse of nothingness that swallowed you whole. An endless drift. It would have almost been peaceful if not for the faint pull at the edges of your awareness, like an anchor trying to tether to something you couldn’t see. 

But then came the first sound. 

You heard voices—muffled cries. Please wake up, said one voice. Please stay with me, came another. 

Pain began to throb somewhere in the background, dull and distant. Disembodied as if it belonged to someone else. 

Don’t you dare leave me. The voice was sharp, demanding, cracking under the weight of fear. You knew that voice and remembered all the sweet things it used to whisper to you. Your heart takes a painful lurch. You can hear its occasional beat in your ears. We need you. I need you. 

Oddly, you were cold.

You were drifting again, further and further. The anchor was slipping. You were sinking, your head hardly above water, when another muffled voice broke through—whimpering, sobbing. Your heart lurches painfully.

Mom, please don’t go.

The words pierce through the nothingness, shattering it all to bits and pieces. The words pull at you, a lifeline you hadn’t known you clung to and needed. Images begin to flash, and suddenly, the voices are no longer just voices. Your heart suddenly burns as though the memory of life itself is fighting its way back into you. 

Your eyelids were heavy, limbs weak, unresponsive—cold. You were so cold, but it wasn’t enough to stop you from crawling out of a black pit that threatened to swallow you whole. There’s a faint sensation of pressure, a hand tightly gripping yours. 

Light begins bleeding into the edges of your awareness. You sucked in a deep breath, lungs empty and greedy. 

Then, your eyes fluttered open.  

You blinked a few times, realizing how hard it was to breathe. Breathing was supposed to be an automatic response, but you had to force it, each breath dragging along the back of your throat like sandpaper. You’re weak and shivering as you use most of your energy to sit up. You were in an empty room, you realized—the sharp smell of sanitizer permeating your nose. 

You push yourself out of bed, knees buckling under your weight. You catch yourself, gathering whatever bits of strength you have left. Your teeth clattered. You were freezing. Shaking, you wrapped the white blanket over your shoulders, gripping it tight before you trudged towards the door.

The hall was mostly empty, all except for a sleeping boy slouched over in a chair beside your door. Your heart squeezes. 

“Megumi,” you whispered his name. You stare at him for a moment, unable to bite back the tears that nip at your dry eyes. 

You wrapped the blanket around him, tucking it gently around him. However, he flinches, jumping straight up in his chair. “S-Sorry,” you tell him quickly with a watery smile. “You looked cold.” 

“You…” the word was a raw and weak whisper. His eyes widened. It took a moment for recognition to settle in, but once it did, he spoke again. “You’re awake.” He stood up from his chair, and you stepped back, offering him space. “You’re awake,” he repeated again. 

Then, you start to wonder just how long you’ve been out of it. Days? Weeks? The thought of months terrifies you, but before you can even go down that loophole, he’s hugging you tightly. “You’re awake,” he says once more, his voice breaking. 

However long it was, he’s right. You’re awake. You’re here, living and breathing. You wrap your arms around his torso, patting and rubbing his back soothingly. “Yup… I’m here. I’m awake.” 

You let him be the one to pull away, letting him take however long he needs. You enjoyed it regardless. You couldn’t remember the last time you hugged him. 

When he pulls away, his eyes are red. He sniffs a bit, backing up and taking the blanket off his shoulders. This time, he’s the one wrapping the fabric around you. He’s frowning a bit as he does. “... you’re the one that’s cold,” he notes quietly. 

“What happened?”

“You don’t remember?” He asks softly, brows furrowing. 

You shook your head. No. Frankly, you didn’t remember much of anything right now. “I was on my way with Yuji and Nobara. We got on the train after you let me know where you were staying.” That’s right. You texted Megumi when you figured out where you’d be staying. You thought they’d come over sometime in the following days. You had no idea they were rushing to see you on the next available train. 

He places his hands awkwardly on your shoulder before gently guiding you to the chair he was sitting in moments ago. As you go to sit, your body seems to forget how to move for a moment, and you lose your balance. He catches you quickly, carefully helping you down into the chair. “When we got to Kyoto, we realized quickly how bad things were over there.   We started helping out at the Kyoto school, dealing with the curses that had been lingering in the area where the cursed womb opened up. Eventually, we ran into Todo and Miwa. They told us what happened.” He grunts, kneeling down so he’s at eye level with you. 

You’re silent for a moment. “How long was I out for?”

“Pushing four days now.” 

The memories strike you like a fright train. “Are you okay? Is everyone alright?” You hadn’t realized you had reached for his cheek. 

He grabs your wrist, thumb gently caressing the back of your hand before pulling your hand away, guiding it back to your lap. He moves the blanket until it's covering you again.  “We’re all fine. Everything’s been dealt with. Yuji and Nobara went down to the cafe to grab some lunch. They’ll be thrilled when they come back.”

You tilt your head. “Why didn’t you go with them?”

He smiles a bit. “I didn’t want to leave you unattended.”

You don’t know what to think. You’re just happy you’re back. Happy because he was happy. You always hated it when he worried about you. You never believed it was his job to do so. However, he stayed by your side and protected you when you couldn’t protect yourself. 

You wiggle your toes and roll your shoulders before standing again. “You shouldn’t be standing–”

“I’m alright, I promise,” you tell him, dismissing his concern. “I just want to walk around, okay?”

He stares at you intently, unsure, but he seems to have no energy to argue with you. “... alright,” he relents. 

He follows you closely as you drag your feet across the floor. You don’t know where you are walking, but you want to stretch your legs and regain a sense of your body. You are weak, but you need to move. 

You ask the question you were too hesitant to ask: “What about Gojo?”

He huffs. “He left a little while ago. Said he’d be back shortly,” he scoffs. “Bullshit if you ask me.”

“Megumi,” you sigh his name with a soft reprimand. 

“He should be here,” he responds disgruntledly. “He should be by your side, and he’s not."

You stay quiet. You’re not exactly sure what to say to him when you agree. Maybe Gojo was done. Whatever this was, whatever relationship you had—maybe he didn’t want you anymore. You look ahead, fighting your own body that threatened to collapse at any moment. You could feel Megumi’s eyes on you, but you didn’t have the heart to look at him right now.

You were afraid you would sob if you did. 

Though you had never walked these halls before, the hospital's layout was quite easy to catch on to. After taking a fourth right turn, you see your room in the distance. A stubborn part of you says to keep going and keep walking, but the exhaustion is catching up to you quickly. If Megumi hadn’t been by your side, cautious eyes scanning you, you might have kept going until you passed out. You realize that the strength you had was nearly depleted. Only trickles of your cursed energy remained, and it would be a long while before you gained it back. 

You hear footsteps behind you. Quick and ushered. Megumi turns before you, his whole frame tensing.  He sucks his teeth and clicks his tongue. “So he finally shows up.” He speaks in a sardonic tone, loud enough for anyone in the hallways to hear.

Satoru comes running from around the corner then, taking deep breaths. Your brows slightly pinch together in confusion. “S–Satoru,” you stutter, walking closer. “When did you get here?”  He looks disheveled. Alarmed. Was he just running? 

It was hard trying to figure out what he was feeling or experiencing when that black eyeband covered his eyes. However, you noticed the bouquet in his hands, a delicate combination of soft and tender hues: pale pink and roses, white peonies, deep pink lilies, and baby’s breath delicately wrapped along sprigs of greenery. 

You place a hand on Megumi’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go eat with the others?”

“But–”

“I’ll be alright,” you explain to him in a soft tone.

He hesitates, torn between staying and leaving.  He was unsure if he should leave you to handle this alone, but after a moment, he backed down, probably realizing he shouldn’t stand between the two of you and what needed to happen. With an irate glance shot at Gojo, he turns, pocketing his hands as he makes his way to the stairs. 

Only when the door shuts do you look at Satoru again. 

He stays unusually quiet, his face unreadable. Frankly, it was rather unsettling. You had no idea what was going through his mind. “I–I’m sorry!” you blurt out the first words that crash to the surface of your mind the moment you see him in his entirety. There was no hope of holding back. After days spent away from him, lost in his absence, and days dancing on the edge of death, the words tumble out of you before you can stop them—unbidden, unstoppable. “For everything. Y–You must have been stressed with work and other things. My fuck up only added to your plate. I get it, ya know? It's selfish of me, even now, to rely on you so much when there’s a whole world that needs you. They are not my students, and I put them in danger.” Quickly, the tears gather in your waterline again, but you blink them away. “I–I’ll be leaving soon. I’ll… I’ll go. I’ll get out of your way, and you won’t have to deal with me bothering you any longer–”

“Can I touch you?” The question comes suddenly, softly, and almost hesitantly. 

You blink a few times, puzzled, but then, you unravel, folding inward under the weight of his voice. Your breath hitches in your throat. Was he still holding onto what you had said that night? Was he haunted by the barriers broken and the others so carelessly assembled? 

He still wanted you? 

You didn’t want him to let you go. Not yet. Not ever.

Like a dam breaking, you surged forward, closing the space between you two. Seconds later, you feel his resolve crumble. He crushes you to his chest, flowers falling to the floor. His arms enveloped you with a force that robbed you of breath, your feet nearly coming off the ground as you both stumble backward. Trembling, he clung to you as if you were an anchor in a world that threatened to tear him apart. There were no words—the unspoken agony and grief were far too overwhelming to put into words—if there even were words for it. 

I’m sorry. I love you. I’m glad you’re okay.  You felt it all with him. You could feel the pounding of his heart against your chest, hear its frantic rhythm match your own.

His hands were shaking, one tangling in your hair, the other wrapping entirely around your frame and squeezing your hip. He buries his face into your neck, and his hot breath is ragged and uneven as he inhales your scent. “I thought–” he swallows, shaking his head. “I didn’t know where you were—for a second time.”

Your cursed energy was low, more depleted than it had ever been. It explains why you were so weak, so frail. When he saw your empty bed, he must’ve panicked. He ran to you, anxiously following the weak traces of your presence. 

Your fingers tangle in his hair, and the familiar silk of his eyeband rubs against your skin. You gently tug at the fabric with the tips of your fingers. His breath hitches, but he doesn't pull away. Instead, he stills as you slip the black band from his face. He lifts his head just enough to rest it against yours. They were that same stunning shade of azure—bright and impossibly vivid, glowing softly as if they carried the remnants of a forgotten star. Captivating, otherworldly, yet achingly human—something he’d often forget from time to time. 

“You promised,” he murmurs, voice broken. “You promised.”  

“What are you talking about?” you ask just as brokenly. 

Suddenly, one of his hands grasps your neck, and you choke on your words. He doesn’t squeeze tight, but the look on his face is enough to make you gasp. “I couldn’t feel you. I couldn’t feel you anymore,” he says achingly. 

Your chest tightens, nails slightly digging into his forearm. You open your mouth to speak, failing more times than succeeding. You wanted to speak, but the words lodged in your mouth. 

“I–I don’t understand.”

“You’re not wearing it anymore,” he murmurs, his nose brushing softly against your cheek. The necklace you always wore—his gift to you, the one that held a part of him, a part of the two of you—was gone. He could feel it in the pit of his stomach, an absence that gnawed at him like hunger, an emptiness he could never satisfy. 

His voice wasn’t angry, far from it. It wasn’t even harsh, but something in it—a quiet desperation—made the air between the two of you quiver. 

“You promised you’d never go where I couldn’t follow,” he whispers again. “Remember?” 

You nod in his hold, tightly pursing your lips together when a few tears escape, dripping from your eyes.  He leans in, pressing his forehead against yours again, gazing deep and unwavering into your eyes. I remember. His grip on your neck loosens until he removes his hand from your throat completely, gentle fingers pushing down your shirt's fabric. His fingers trace your skin, the empty spot where your necklace once laid. 

Then, it suddenly hits you. “Oh.”  

He could feel you as much as you felt him. If you were ever too far from him—out of the range of his sight, out from where his hands could reach for you, that necklace was a beacon, a beckoning, a lighthouse in the storm that guided you home—guided him home. 

You squeeze him tighter. You missed him. You really missed him. 

“How did you find me?” 

He takes a moment to breathe, trying to settle the rapid beat of his heart. “Utahime.” He wheezes out a pained laugh. “She called me panicking once you collapsed. I got there as quickly as I could.”  

You copy his laugh, albeit coughing a bit from the pain blooming in your ribs. You hated to admit it, but the longer you stood, the more your body began to hurt. “I should just heal myself and get this over with.”

“Don’t,” his grip tightens on you again. “you’re using it wrong. There’s damage, lots of it,” he tells you, wiping at the blood that had stained your skin at the corner of your mouth with his thumb. “Any more and–” his eyebrows furrowed deeply, the weight of grief and guilt tugging his features. The corner of his lips tightened. “Shoko operated on you for hours. You nearly died.”

He sees what others cannot, his gaze piercing the surface to something deeper, something raw. He sees the world through an entirely different lens, and right now, the sight of you seems to pain him dearly. 

For a moment, you wonder just how much damage is hidden within you and how much it must weigh on him to see it. “Shoko might have gotten you out of the woods, but she told me you’d need a few more rounds to get you back to normal.”

“That makes sense,” you murmur, allowing your entire body weight to ease into him. He accepts you with open arms. “I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Or twenty.”

“I missed it,” he utters, voice thick with regret. “If I had just looked a bit closer, we wouldn’t be in this mess. I fucked up. I could’ve prevented this.” His careful grip on you tightens as if you’d slip away from him once more.  “But,” his tone softens. “You did so well. You took care of that cursed womb before I could even get to the scene.” Even through his pain and wallowing, his heart swells. He was proud of you. 

He bends down, grabbing the flowers he dropped before moving towards you again. “Oh gosh,” you hide your face into his neck as he reaches down, one arm hooking under your legs as he lifts you. You don’t hesitate, wrapping your arms around his neck. “I’m definitely fired, aren’t I?” 

He carefully guides you back into your room. He manages to toss your flowers on the counter by the window. “Don’t worry about any of that. I’ll handle it. ‘Kay?” He places you down on your bed, but he hesitates, not wanting to fully pull away. 

Your eyes flicker, recalling the night of your augment. You knew this was the reason behind his haunted expression. You recognized the torment because you, too, had felt it. “You’re mad,” he observes relatively quickly.

You didn’t want to bring it up. You weren't necessarily mad, not anymore, but even near death couldn’t make you forget the pain he had caused with words he so carelessly struck you down with. 

“What you said… Hurt me, Gojo,” you look down at your hands, feeling selfish for even bringing this up after nearly dying. However, you knew this conversation was inevitable.  “Even if you were right I felt cast aside. Useless. Why didn't you tell me you felt that way before?”

“No… don’t say that. I was being stupid. I over reacted. I know you'd always protect those kids and that's exactly what you did. You’re not weak or a nuisance, or... convenient.” you flinch at the word. “You’re far from that. I need you to know that.”

“...Then what am I?”

“Everything,” he shudders. “You’re everything.” His lips brush over your forehead, your cheeks, and eyelids, each kiss tender and lingering. But then he pauses, his smooth lips hovering just above yours. He’s always been so confident, so self-assured. You’re unsure how to react.

You were sitting on your bed, feet dangling just above the floor. He is leaning over you, one large and warm hand on your thigh, the other cupping your face gently. He was close, but not close enough. Even bent at the waist, his height keeps him just out of your reach unless he leans back down just a bit more…

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him down to you, giving him all the assurance you have to offer.

You were hurt, but you still wanted him.

You still loved him. 

His mouth was warm and soft—testing the waters and treading carefully. His grip on your thigh tightens until– 

He lets go. You feel the tension in his body dissipate, and finally, he allows himself to fully enjoy you—taste you. The kiss deepens, and you swear it brought life back into your frail body. He overwhelms you now in the most delicious way possible. Your toes curl, and your tight embrace eases. Your arms go weak, your hands moving to run down his chest, his taut muscles quivering in the wake of your touch.  Every moment was a promise, every brush of skin a new vow. No words were spoken, but you both heard everything that had been held back, everything that had been left unsaid. 

I’m sorry.

I love you. 

I love you.

I love you. 

He smiles against your lips, but you don’t stop or pull away, catching and nipping at his bottom lip. Then, you kiss him again, slotting his top lip between yours. “You really love me, huh? Hehe.”

Oh. You hadn’t realized you said it—whimpered murmurs against his lips. No wonder why he looked all dopey and smiley. 

“You’re not going to make me grovel for forgiveness?” He pecks your lips again. “This seems too easy. I know you’re still mad.”

You chase after his lips. “Of course, I’m still mad,” you mutter against him. “But I thought I would never see you again.” Even as he frowns, you pepper his lips with kisses. “Plus, it's not like you to grovel.”

“I would for. Only for you, of course.”

You giggle, nipping his lip a little harder. “Yeah,” you rolled your eyes. “I’d like to see that.”

Oh no. You’ve made a grave mistake. You knew you messed up again the second the words fell from your lips. There’s a glint in his eyes now. 

“Oh, my beautiful, angelic Queen! I know I have displeased you. Please accept my humble apologies!” You squeak at the suddenness of his actions. He sinks to his knees dramatically, and his palms meet the dirty floor, and so does his forehead. “I am at your mercy! I have failed you greatly, and I wish to make amends.”

You swat him on the back of his head, but it's not nearly enough to hurt him or deter him from whatever this is. “Gojo! Don’t bow like that! Get up!”

“But I can’t!” He whines. “You must forgive me! I will spend eternity on my knees if it means I can regain your favor, my perfect, beautiful, divine Queen. You alone rule this sinners heart!”  He inches forward on his knees, squeezing himself between your legs. His hands find homage on your waist as he nudges his face into your stomach.

Your eyes roll skyward. “Only you could apologize and insult me at the same time, Satoru,” you grumble, looking down at him before running your fingers through white stands. 

Suddenly, he looks up from this position, resting his chin right beneath your ribs, grinning ear to ear. “You called me Satoru~”

You feel your face flush, heat gushing to your cheeks and ears. “Shut up. You’re such an idiot. Can you get up now?”

“Nah,” he says lazily, burying his head into your stomach again. His voice comes out muffled. “I’m trying to make amends with my Queen. Let me, will ya?”

You ease, realizing you won't be able to stop him from doing what he wants. Even if it was a bit theatrical, he was doing his best—you know that because you know him. You let your nails gently graze his scalp as you continued to pat him. He hums, almost purrs, as your other hand finds his shoulder, squeezing him gently before running your fingers under his shirt, caressing his skull and the taut muscles in his back. A beat of silence passes, but you find yourself uncaring.

You had him back in your arms. That’s all that really mattered to you right now.

“Look, I know… I know I messed up,” he begins, voice so low, you nearly miss it. “I’m not great at this—saying the right things. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was stressed. I was fed up with the higher-ups and fed up with my missions, but that’s no excuse. If I could take it all back, I would in a heartbeat. You deserve better than what I was giving you. I’m gonna try to be better… for you. For us.”  His words hang in the air a bit awkwardly, but you can see the sincerity in his eyes and hear it in his voice. It couldn’t be missed. He shifts a bit, moving to kiss your belly. Then, his large hand wrap around yours, guiding your hand closer to his lips. He kisses the back of your knuckles tenderly as if the act of his apology could never be enough.

“You want me to stay?”

He squeezes you tighter. “Of course I do. What would I be without you?”

“Hm. You’d still be Gojo Satoru. Even without me.” 

“I don’t want to imagine a life without you,” he mutters. “Wherever you go, that’s where I’ll follow. I've already told you that…”

“Don’t say that,” you whisper sweetly, patting his head. He nudges his head further into you. “The world will always need you.”

“I will always need you. So please… stop talking like this.” He pinches your side, making you squeak. Finally he looks up, an unimpressed expression gracing his features. “And don’t ever leave the city to get away from me. When you told me you were going to a hotel, I thought you meant in Tokyo.”

You chuckle nervously, looking elsewhere. “Yeah… Sorry about that.” 

“Next time, take a walk or something. I dunno, go touch some grass if you get tired of me.”

A small smile escaped you, followed by a quiet laugh that shook your shoulders. You pat his back three times before kneading him softly. “Okay, humble peasant. You've groveled for long enough. Now lay with me,” you demand him. “I want you to lay with me. I’m so tired.”

“Psh. I’d hardly fit on this bed.”

“Whatever,” you tell him, scooting over. “I’ll make room. Get in, string bean.”

He grins. “Yes, ma’am.”

 It’s a bit awkward at first with his lanky form, but he makes it work. It was a tight fit, and his feet slightly dangled off the bed, but he made no objections. With your back to his chest, he held you against him securely.

“You’re cold,” he observes out loud when you start playing with his fingers. It’s a bitter realization, a deafening one on his part. You know it bothers him, especially as he wraps the blanket around you tighter.

He tries not to let it show. However, he quickly becomes restless and you know he isn’t sated. He begins to move. “Let me go get you another blanket.”

“Nooo. Stay here.”

“Huh? But you’re freezing! And you’re never cold!”

“I’m already warming up!” You intervene with a small giggle, tugging him by his jacket. “Just shut up and lay with me, already.” He hesitates before unbuttoning his black jacket. When he was determined, there wasn’t any stopping a man like him, and right now, he was determined to get you warm.

He lays his jacket over you, spreading the fabric out, smoothing away all the wrinkles, and making sure you're covered. It might as well be a blanket with how long it was over you. Bonus points because it still carried him warmth and smelled like his cologne. A blend of earth and wood with a hint of something darker—smokey and smooth. You always loved the scent. Whenever he walked by, it brushed past you like a gentle breeze over still water, warm and inviting, with subtle notes of leather, musk, and vanilla. 

He grunts a bit before easing into the bed again. “My little icicle- ow,” you shot your elbow back, getting him right in the ribs. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop.” He chuckles, before wrapping his arms over you one more. He brushes your hair from your neck, his breath fanning against your skin. He kisses you there once, twice, three times before saying something familiar. 

“I could sense when you left Tokyo. I didn’t know what to do. Even with my eyes, I couldn’t find you. You were just gone. Don’t ever go where I can’t follow." He kisses your neck. "Please.”

You turn around, searching for his lips. He melts into you once again, squeezing your side sweetly. “I promise,” you murmur. “Wherever you go, that’s where I’ll follow,” you say, voicing back the same promise he made you. He smiles faintly against your lips.  

When you woke up the next morning, your necklace was there. It was back where it belonged, sapphires resting gently over your steady beating heart—carrying Satoru’s silent promise.

Wherever you go, that’s where I follow. 

-

a/n: I honestly don't know how I feel about this but if you made it to the end I hope the nearly 18k was worth reading. If you couldn't tell its based off the song Die With A Smile. Honestly, I think I might have been happier by making this a bit longer and flushing out some of the scenes more, but I was trying new things and I was excited to post my first jjk post :) however its getting late now but if there's any typos or errors I notice later I'll edit as needed.

anyways, if you'd like to see more gojo x sorcerer!reader let me know! also I really hoped you liked the bits I added with Megumi (he's just a smol bean).

likes and reblogs are always appreciated! :p

[mxnhoo]

like you! (n. rk)

synopsis your bestfriend that you've always bickered with suddenly.. starts to appear.. more.... attractive? genre frenemies to lovers, comedy, romance, fluff, reader sucks at her studies, riki sucks too but he's smarter, reader and riki bickers like.. a lot.., riki and reader is lowkey like risa and otani from lovely complex, friend group goes on a trip together, jealousy, slight miscommunication, riki surprises reader a lot, New Years (eve), countdown and fireworks rahh, both of them get worked up so easily lols, reader's parents are mad chill, confessions, so much fucking teasing, not proofread (yet) pairing nishimura riki x f!reader featuring jake, jungwon, sunghoon, sunoo (all are the same age/grade) word count ~11.1k warnings not much, lots of insults ig?, please lmk if i missed out on anything cly's note i do nawt know why i left this draft dusting when it literally had so much POTENTIAL. this is probs my fave fic cos i enjoyed writing it so much. unfortunately there are certain parts that i half-assed but hopefully they arent that obvious. THIS FIC IS SO CUTE hope yall enjoy it. AND i made a playlist for this too so ill post it soon. okay gn guys.

show your support by liking, reblogging and commenting! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

now playing i like u — niki | [playlist]

"In your face, loser!" you laughed out, pointing at Ni-ki who was now pouting at you. With the Wii controller in your hand, you shook the console around to make your in-game character continuously swing their racket.

That's right.

You were playing Wii Sports out of all things even if your exams were nearing.

Sulking at his loss, he sat himself down on the couch beside Jaeyun who was enjoying everything and released a loud sigh for you to hear. Still celebrating your victory by laughing and jumping around, you took a moment to glance at Ni-ki, who could be seen glaring at you. You stuck your tongue out at him and he simply rolled his eyes.

"Y/N won again?" Sunghoon spoke up, entering the living room from the kitchen with Jungwon by his side. Ni-ki scoffed. and you simply felt your ego get boosted from Sunghoon's words. You turned your body to Sunghoon, both hands resting on your hips as you loudly replied, "That's right!".

"Ni-ki lost 3 times in a row" Jaeyun teased, earning a hard slap from Ni-ki causing him to yelp loudly and rub the area where he got smacked from, "Ouch..".

You giggled at the sight of Ni-ki being salty, and you pointed the console at him, "Rematch?".

Ni-ki flipped his head up towards you, his expression displeased as he responded, "So you can beat me again? Not happening".

You whined at him and Jungwon chuckled, sitting himself beside Jaeyun who was still gently rubbing his arm from the hit.

"Don't forget that there's still work to do," Jungwon voiced out, earning a groan from you as you remembered the work you have yet to finish.

"Just one more rematch!" you pleaded, turning your head back to Ni-ki who was now scrolling on his phone. "Ki," your tone sounding serious and he sighed before setting his foot to the floor and standing up. "Just one more."

Spoiler alert, you won again.

Before you knew it, you were scribbling on your homework. You let out a soft sigh, sitting back on your chair as you glanced around. In front of you revealed Sunghoon, Jaeyun and Jungwon typing on their laptops, remaining completely silent. To your right was Ni-ki, who also seemed completely focused at the work at hand.

You poked your tongue against your cheek, thoughts to just abandon your work and play again filling your head. Your face lit up and you turned your head to Ni-ki to ask him to play again until you noticed the frown on his face while doing his work.

You scanned his features, noticing his black hair being rested nicely on his forehead, partially covering his eyes. Your eyes shifted over to his ears, noticing his piercings that you never took the chance to see up-close. One helix and one earlobe piercing. His jawline looking sharper than usual, and prominence of his Adam's apple. He had always complained that he disliked his left side, but for some reason, you found it pleasing to look at.

Woah, he's actually kinda good looking.. When did he look this attractive?

You quickly slapped yourself, a loud sound emitting through the room, earning you a mix of concerned and confused expressions from the rest.

"Have you gone mental or something?" Ni-ki scoffed, clearly judging you. You rolled your eyes and looked back at the papers that were nicely laid on the table in front of you.

"I think Biology's driving her insane," Jaeyun teased and you stuck your tongue out at him. You brushed the thoughts you had of Ni-ki away. Jaeyun was probably correct, right? It was just Biology driving you insane?

You groaned before you look back at Ni-ki, glancing at his papers to see what he was working on.

"Ki, you're doing Biology too, right? Help me out." you leaned closer to Ni-ki, looking at the contents of the papers he was doing. It was indeed the same paper as yours, and you faced him, giving him a pleading look.

He raised an eyebrow at you and leaned backwards on his chair, folding his arms, "Why should I help you?".

Your jaw slightly dropped as you scowled at him, "Don't tell me you're still salty?".

"Oh. No more help then." he stated, his body turning back as he continued writing on his paper. You groaned as you continued to keep your gaze on him, watching as he scribbles on his paper.

You slowly lean closer to him, attempting to see his answers but he notices your antics and scoffed at you, leaning forward and using his body to prevent you from looking. You rolled your eyes and you sat back on your chair, releasing a sigh of defeat.

Few minutes pass by and you try to keep your attention on your homework, having to re-read the question multiple times due to your mind drifting away while reading. You glanced over at Ni-ki again, and he was no longer blocking you from seeing his work.

It didn't work when you tried to see his work, so why not take it from him..?

You couldn't help but to smirk at the clever idea you thought of, slowly leaning towards him before snatching the paper from him. He immediately let out a loud gasp and snapped his head at you, attempting to snatch it back from you.

You laughed out loud as you turned your back to him, trying to read all of his answers before he manages to snatch his work back. Ni-ki kept trying to snatch it but your back was facing him, making it impossible for him, and as you were about to finish reading his answers, he stood behind you, his body hovering over yours and his arms taking his paper back into his hands from both sides.

Your giggles slowly start to die down as you look behind you, noticing the close proximity between you and Ni-ki. His back was pressed up all against you, and his face were mere inches away from yours, and as you felt your heart skip a beat, you immediately pushed him away.

"Seriously? You steal my paper and now you push me away?" he grumbled, glaring at you before sitting back on his chair. Your mind quickly recalled the proximity you and Ni-ki had just a few seconds ago, causing your heart rate to pick up the pace and blood to rush to the tip of your ears.

You shot a displeased look at him, retorting back, "It's not that hard to share your answers!". He simply rolled his eyes and continued to do his work after sitting back down. There were a few giggles from the others, clearly enjoying the bickering that was happening in front of them, it was like their form of entertainment, but afterwards the room grew silent again.

The silence helped you to realise the pace your heart was beating at, your chest feeling like it was going to burst. You blink repetitively, feeling confused as to why you were feeling that way. You once again recalled the moment when you and Ni-ki was at close proximity, causing your breathing accelerated and your face to feel hot.

What was this feeling? Why were you feeling this way? Why does it feel so weird..?

You cleared your throat as you took a waterbottle in front of you into your hands, gulping it down in hopes to make this unusual feeling go away before you heard another loud voice again.

"That's mine!" Ni-ki's voice called out again, and you quickly gain back consciousness, glancing at the bottle you were holding and confirming that it was, indeed, Ni-ki's bottle before you gasp and quickly place it down on the table. You looked at Ni-ki with widened eyes, your eyes blinking repetitively in confusion as he flashed you another disapproving look.

"Seriously, what's going on with you today?" he grumbled and snatched his bottle, placing it to his side which was out of reach to you. He was right though, what was going on with you today? You pouted, feeling guilty as you tried to think about all the reasons why you acted that way. "Sorry.." you apologised.

"That's a first." Ni-ki stated, his tone remaining strict as you rolled your eyes at his sarcastic comment. You looked up at the boys sat in front of you and realised all 3 of them were watching you and Ni-ki, giggling at you two were bickering.

It wasn't new that you and Ni-ki bichered, but it never failed to be entertaining. "Gosh, 3 of you, just do your work." you said, shaking your head and giving them an annoyed look.

You sat back on your chair, staring into blank space and completely disregarding the loud environment around you as conversations emerged from all corners of the room. You hated how majority of the conversations were about Biology, especially since the exams were coming up. The fact that you have to hear it even before class gave you a major headache, and it immediately brought your energy level down.

"Someone's already unhappy," a voice spoke out, sounds of the chair beside you being dragged as you noticed a figure sit themselves down beside you. You turned to the figure and realised it was Ni-ki. The smug expression plastered all over his face didn't go unnoticed by you, giving you the desire to remove that expression from his face with your own hands. "Someone's already being a nuisance," you shot back.

He chuckled, enjoying how it was clearly evident that you were ticked off. "Did you manage to get that paper done?" he questioned, but it came off as a taunt to you. "Oh shut up.." you rolled your eyes.

He chuckled before leaning in closer to you, "Don't want the answers?". Your face lit up and you turned your body to him, completely sold to the idea of him giving the answers to you. "Please!" you begged, holding your hands up with your palms against each other.

The corner of his mouth curved up, realising how much power he has in this situation, and he folded his arms while slouching onto the chair, "You can't just get things for free, right?". You looked at him in disbelief. Was he seriously going to play like this?

The thought of smacking him and arguing with him again seemed ideal, but you actually needed the answers, so for once you gave in. "What do you want?".

"How about..." Ni-ki dragged his words, holding his chin as he looked at the ceiling to think. You felt yourself growing impatient as he continued to hum.

"A kiss on the cheek?" "HUH?!"

Your face instantly grew red, your mouth agape as you looked at him with widened eyes. Your heart rate could be felt increasing, and it felt almost as if your chest was going to burst. You blinked at him repetitively in confusion, and he looked at you with a confused expression from your loud reaction.

Ni-ki cleared his throat, "I.. was just joking..". He scratched his neck and looked away, clearly not expecting your reaction and only now realising his joke.

"The c-cafe! Treat me to the cafe later, got it?!" he pointed at you, the apples of his cheek slightly tinted with a hint of pink. Still in a state of shock, you slowly nodded and he could be seen taking out the paper from his bag, loudly placing it down on your table before going on his phone and scrolling, so obviously feeling awkward at the situation.

You slowly took your eyes off of him, pushing your chair in and straightening your posture before you started to copy his answers. Your hands were quite wobbly as you read Ni-ki's answers and wrote it down, but the moment from a few seconds ago not failing to stay in your head. Why would he ask such a question?

Right after the class, he immediately dashed out without uttering a word, leaving you in a state of shock. Yesterday you were out of it and today was his turn. You scoffed as you took your own time to pack your stuff since you didn't have a noisy being that was usually nagging at you to quicken up.

The classroom started to quitetten down as students start to leave to have their lunch. As you hung your bag around your shoulder, you probably like the 4th last person to leave. You huffed out, feeling irritated at the thought that Ni-ki just left you alone without saying a word, and you immediately started walking out of the classroom.

He wants to leave you stranded? Okay. Fine. You won't find him until he finds you like a helpless puppy. He wants to play like this? Sure.

You had finished grabbing a packet of bread from the cafeteria and immediately made your way to the benches, where you and Ni-ki always ate together until you heard voices at the front of the field.

"What do you think about her?".

The voices were muffled and you couldn't care less, continuing your way until you heard a familiar voice.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" the familiar voice sounded, their tone sounding flustered and irritated.

You immediately stop your tracks and held your breath, focusing on hearing their conversation and interested in the juicy details.

"Who else, Y/N of course!"

Your heart immediately stopped hearing your name, your eyes widening and your jaw dropping all at once.

Now you must really listen and get all the juicy details about your maybe.. secret admirer. You were still flabbergasted but you immediately recovered, wanting to see who was talking about you. You hid behind a bush, peeking your head out just so you could see who they were.

Your eyes squint as you try to make out who it was and.. oh....

"She's weird as hell, 'kay?! She's always been weird but lately, it's just- more!" Ni-ki ranted, his entire face sour as he spoke about her.

Your chest tightened and your stomach felt queesy as you learn how Ni-ki talked about you behind your back. Typically, you'd barge into the conversation by now and punch Ni-ki for shit talking you like that, but this time you felt different.

This time you'd wish that he'd talk nicely about you for once.

You'd stealthily leave, not wanting to hear more of their conversation as your entire mood shifted. You'd found acquintances back in the cafeteria and lucky enough, they were kind to let you eat with them. Everyone was a bit skeptical because you weren't with Ni-ki as usual, but they remained silent, sensing the tension.

You wanted to run away and go home immediately, but here you were, sitting in the cafe just as you promised Ni-ki earlier. He didn't give you a chance to run away since he immediately grabbed your wrist before you could make a move. You wanted to excuse yourself but he brought up the fact he did a favour for you by letting you copy him — hence, you couldn't just run away.

He sat down across you, setting a tray with only his drink since you refused to get a drink of your own, not wanting to get comfortable with him. Your irritated expression didn't go unnoticed, and when you glared at him then rolled your eyes, he immediately snapped back.

"What's your problem?"

You scoffed, smirking as you rolled your eyes again. "What's my problem? I could ask you the same".

"Dude, I literally have no clue what you're talking about—" "Oh, like remember how you just left me in the classroom?"

He seemed a bit stunned, but there was this guilty look on his face.

"Okay I'm sorry for tha—" "Or when you called me 'weird as hell'? I'm sorry that I've been weirder lately!" you interrupted, your tone sarcastic. "You heard that?!" "Well no shit I heard you talk behind my back proudly!"

His tensed up face relaxed slightly. "Wait, that's all you heard?"

"Well what else was I supposed to hear?! What else about me were you planning to insult? My face, huh?"

He heaved a sigh of relief, "Thank God..".

"Excuse me? What the fuck are you thanking God for?" "No! I-" he seemed loss for words. "It's not like that, okay? Just- forget about it". "You're unbelievable," you sighed loudly, taking his drink and sipping from it, looking out the window and missing his flustered expression.

He knew you wouldn't talk to him unless he lit your mood up immediately, so he suggested a solution within a snap. "I'll pay. Order your own drink, I'll pay".

Your eyes immediately lit up at his suggestion, your eyes suddenly filled again with so much life.

"Even for your drink?" "Even for my drink."

You licked your lips and after you set his drink down on the table, you pointed your finger at him. "You.. Next time you talk shit about me, say it to my face, kay?!".

He nodded, not wanting to anger you further. "Okay, fine". He sheepishly watched you, mumbling in a soft voice, "Sorry..".

You puffed your cheeks at him and pouted, your heart fluttering as you saw his guilty expression. Oh my god, it was that feeling again. You snapped your neck the other direction and brushed him off, "Whatever".

You clasped your hands together, feeling elated. "Exams are finally over!" you announced, earning cheers and claps from the others. You jumped onto the couch beside Jaeyun and immediately got comfortable, a wave of relief washing over you — no more thinking about grades, exams, studies at least for a while.

"Guys, we have to do something," Jaeyun suggested, leaning forward while steepling his hands, looking at everyone as he invited for hangout ideas.

"Arcade!" Jungwon recommended. "We already do that," Ni-ki shot. "Camping?" Sunghoon voiced. "Yeah nah, no way," Jake answered with slight fear in his voice. "How 'bout swimming?" Jake recommended. Ni-ki frowned and shook his hands, "We should do something that isn't some one-day thing".

"A trip". You slammed your hands on your thighs and stood up, "A trip. Staycation. How 'bout that?"

Everyone looked at each other and nodded in agreement, an expression of amusement taking over. Ni-ki teased, "You're finally using your head for once, huh?".

You raised your fist and you shot a glare, earning a giggle from Ni-ki. Jake ignored the two of you, "Should we invite other people?".

Jungwon who sat beside Jake nudged his shoulder and smirked, "Like.. that girl friend group you kept eyeing?".

Jake's eyes immediately widen, and he started to shake his head and wave his hands, "N-no!". He denies it but everyone can see through him from the way the tip of his ears turns red.

You rested your arms on your hips and looked at Jake, giving him a doubtful look. Everyone else followed suit, their expressions filled with doubtfulness and mockery. Jake, out of peer pressure, confessed, "Okay, yes, fine! I do mean them".

Everyone snickered in victory, enjoying his flustered state.

You teased, "Invite them — the more the merrier, right?".

Walking into the resort, you let out a sound of amusement as you take in the view. There was a swimming pool and a jacuzzi side by side, a big kitchen and stairs leading to the second and third floor, probably where all the sleeping rooms were. There was a beach near your resort, making this place the paradise for everyone.

Someone nudged your shoulder and your head snapped up, seeing the iconic mischevious smile on Ni-ki's face. Your chest tightened at how close he was, but you cleared your throat then glared at him.

"One day, I'll kill you," you threatened and he simply laughed. He patted your head making you hitch your breath, "You can try". Your cheeks heated up slightly, and you stuck your tongue out at him.

"Huaah! No way!" Jake cheered as he entered later than you, breaking the banter between you and Ni-ki. You looked back and grinned, feeling proud about your friend's success.

"This shit's amazing, thank God you invited us Jake!" Sabrina gazed into Jake's eyes, a bright smile plastered all over her face.

You glanced back at Ni-ki, both of you giving a knowing gaze at each other and chuckling together. You stopped as you entered the building, checking out the place. Your eyes eventually wander back to Ni-ki and you gulped, feeling nervous that you were on a trip with him.

For some reason, a part of you wanted you to grab his hand to hold him, and the thought of it was torturing you because your heart wanted to explode and you also didn't want to make things weird. You bit your lip as your eyes stared at his hand, and just as you were about to reach out, Ni-ki was nudged forward by someone clinging to his side.

"Ni-ki! Doesn't this place look great?" Nao exclaimed as she held onto his arms, giving him puppy eyes. You immediately pulled your hand back, biting your lips as you realise your chance had slipped away.

"Mm, yeah it does," Ni-ki responds, smiling at her and making you feel awkward, making you puff up your cheeks. You almost felt like you were the third wheel, so you immediately turned around, in hopes that there would be someone to talk to — and to your luck, there was a wandering Sunoo.

You immediately walked up to him and conversed with him, trying to ignore Nao and Ni-ki.

Throughout the entire day, Nao and Ni-ki sticked together, and the bare thought of it made you feel queesy in the stomach.

Whatever. He must be happier with her, right?

During dinner, you sat beside Sunoo, but for some reason, you were laughing more, giggling more, playfully slapping Sunoo more as you two talked. You didn't usually act like this, and it was making you puzzled. And for some reason, you kept eye-ing Nao and Ni-ki, trying to see how they were going and also wishing on their downfall.

You didn't know why you were suddenly acting weird. Probably because this was your first proper trip with your friends, right?

Throughout the entire night, though you kept taking glances at Nao and Ni-ki, everytime Ni-ki wanted to talk or get close to you, you came up with an excuse every single time, saying that you need to talk to Sunoo, or use the toilet or whatever.

You felt irritated at him, feeling the urge to just slap him, but you also didn't know why. You knew he had a punchable and slappable face, but this urge was uncalled for.

Luckily for you, you had a 100% rate in avoiding him. You sighed as you pulled the covers up to your face, staring at the ceiling of the dark room. Dozing off was what you wanted, but your mind was racing with thoughts.

Was Nao a better best friend than you? Is she more fun? Does he like her more?

You screamed into your pillow and kicked your legs, feeling overstimulated by all these thoughts. You threw your head onto the pillow, closing your eyes. Lucky for you, you got room to yourself so you could do this all you wanted.

With your face on the pillow, you tried to focus on your breathing and clear your mind until you heard your door click. You immediately froze as if you'd been caught doing a crime and you held your breath.

You'd thought that it was a burglar who broke in and was targetting you, so when you felt a tap on your shoulder, you flipped yourself to your back and screamed.

The person immediately panicked at your scream, using their hand to cover your mouth. "What's wrong with you?!" a familiar voice complained.

You stop screaming as you realise the person was someone you knew, and you try to make out their features until you realise..

"Do you want to wake the rest or what?!" Ni-ki whisper-shouted.

You immediately calmed down, looking into Ni-ki's eyes. When you processed that Ni-ki was actually here, you suddenly realise how close he was. How he was slightly hovering over you, covering your mouth with his hand and how close his face was.

At the moment of realisation, you pushed him away by instinct, causing his butt to hit the floor. "Ow! What was that for?!" he whisper-shouted once again.

"You were too close!" you replied, also whisper-shouting. You could hear ruffling sounds as he stood back on his feet, supporting himself with his arm as he hovered over the bed to look at you, "You're such a dimwit, you know that?".

"God, do you ever have anything nice to say?" you rolled your eyes, but he didn't catch it because of the darkness.

He sighed as he held himself back from arguing with you. He inhaled as he spoke up, "You and me, let's go".

Confusion took over your face as you try to process his question. You sat up on the bed as you looked up at him. "What are you talking about?'".

"Just- follow me, damnit!" he held your hand as he tugged your arm, signalling you to get off the bed and follow him.

You pursed your lips as you felt his hand holding yours, and you get off the bed, allowing him to drag you.

The house was dark, the area only being lit up from the light of the street light entering through the windows. He was bringing you down the stairs, still holding onto your hand and you pouted your lips.

This was a weird experience, but you weren't complaining.

Since it was dark, you couldn't really see, and you missed a step causing you to slip. Ni-ki immediately turned around and caught you, "Woah there!".

Your arms were rested against his chest as he had his hands on your waist to give you support. "Are you okay?" he asked. and you were almost surprised that he wasn't insulting you or saying anything like "Are you blind?".

You looked down, "Yeah.. Sorry".

You both stepped back, and you almost wished you didn't say anything because you enjoyed his warmth so much, but before you could regret anything, he held your hand again and continued to drag you, being more slow and cautious to prevent anymore falls.

Your heart was beating so fast it could almost jump out of your heart. You could hear your own pulse in your ears and you were thankful that it was dark, because you could physically feel your face heat up.

As he dragged you near the entrance of the resort, you two put on your slippers and he brought you out. You two are immediately met with the cool wind of the night, the wind blowing your hair.

None of you said anything, secretly enjoying each other's presence though you two wouldn't admit it.

You clenched your fist as you grew more nervous. You weren't nervous that Ni-ki was going to kill you or whatever — you were nervous because it was just him. Just him and you, and you two were holding hands. His pace hastened up, almost like he had a clear destination in his head, and you simply followed, not wanting to say anything in fear of making things awkward.

You took more steps, unsure where you were going but you trusted him. You continued walking until you felt the texture of the ground you were walking on change, sand immediately getting on your feet and slippers.

He continued to drag you, the sound of the ocean waves becoming clearer and the view of the water coming closer. The moonlight made the ocean look so pretty, and this was a view you loved so much.

"Check this out," he finally spoke, breaking the silence between the two of you. He continued, "You mentioned once you wanted to see the ocean in the beach in the middle of the night..".

He cleared his throat, continuing further, "So here we are".

You remained silent, completely moonstruck by the view as you watched how the waves flowed, and hearing your silence, he was about to nag you for not thanking him until he saw your dazed look. He sighed, taking your dazed look as a 'thank-you', "You're welcome".

"You remembered," "What?" "You remembered that I said that.."

He smiled, "Why else would I bring you here?".

"You have good memory huh? For someone who has a small brain," you teased, giggling.

"Okay, sure, whatever," he rolled his eyes.

You continued, "Gosh, do you really have good memory?".

"Duh! I'm smart!" he boasted.

"Then what did I say to you when we first met?" "You called me all the vulgarities God knew. What a foul mouth you have," he sighed, looking at the waves as he reminicsed.

"You remember that too? I remember you couldn't even tell me how you and Sunghoon met, y'know?!".

"Me and Sunghoon just happened, 'kay?! Besides, I remember important things only," he muttered.

You raised your eyebrows, warmth filling your chest, "Are you calling me important?".

Ni-ki scoffed, "Don't flatter yourself".

You'd ended up telling Sunoo everything. From when you realised you felt weird about him, to how he brought you to see the waves last night. You almost exploded bottling everything up, but you felt like you could trust him, so you told him everything. He listened earnestly, willing to give you advice.

"From this, I feel like.."

You looked at him attentively, anticipating to his words.

"You like him. Love even," he broke the news and you shouted in shock, causing him to cover your mouth with his hands.

"No way! Me?! Loving that dork?! As if!" you denied as he lowered his hands, feeling your cheeks heat up as you grew more irritated for an unknown reason.

"You can believe what you wanna — but you definitely love him".

You pouted as your chest tightened, the weird feeling coming in again as you thought about him.

You? Loving Ni-ki?

I dunno...

Maybe.

Loud conversation and laughter filled the room as everyone sat in a circle, a glass bottle in the centre spinning. Everyone exclaimed in suspense, watching the bottle slow down till it eventually lands on Nao.

"Nao!" everyone called, and you pursed your lips, your gaze looking at Ni-ki to see how he reacted to Nao being called. He was smiling brightly as he watched her, making your heart crack a bit.

"Nao, truth or dare!" Sabrina asked.

"Err, I'm not ready yet... so truth for now!" Nao answered.

Jake immediately shot with the basic question, "Do you have a crush on anyone?".

She looked hesitant to answer, but she eventually did.

"Yes".

Upon hearing her response, everyone started a teasing chant towards her, making her cheeks go red. You were staring at Ni-ki, knowing that he was probably the one that she liked until he looked back at you.

You immediately broke eye contact, feeling awkward as you tried to pretend like you weren't just staring at him. Nao nervously glanced at him before she spinned the bottle in the middle.

Everyone exclaimed again in suspense, watching the bottle speed up and slow down, and it eventually stops on..

You.

Oh no.

"Y/N! Truth or dare!" Jungwon asked this time, and you gave a weak smile.

"Truth".

Nao shot without wasting a second, "Do you like anyone in this room right now?".

The question caught you off-guard, making you cough on your saliva as you looked around to see everyone's curious gazes on you. You'd caught a bit of Ni-ki's calm behaviour, feeling scared that if you answered you'd somehow reveal your feelings for him.

You nervously looked at Sunoo, and he gave you a reassuring nod, silently encouraging you.

"Y-yeah, yes I do".

Everyone in the room cheered. Everyone except you, Sunoo who already knows who it is, Nao who has a gist and also Ni-ki himself.

"Flip up your papers now and see what number you got! There will be another person in the room who got the same number and you two would have to spend New Years Eve together!" Jake announced.

You did so, and you saw a big "4". You looked around the room, seeing everyone's reaction to their numbers.

Jake continued, "Nuh uh, but no saying what number you got! Breaks the surprise, y'know?!".

Everyone groaned and started to complain, and you simply remained quiet, only hoping that you didn't get Nao.

But obviously you were wishing for one person.

You folded your arms, tapping your feet as you stared into blank space, the loud atmospehre of the streets keeping you awake as you waited for your partner. Jake had announced meeting areas for the specific numbers, and right now you were just patiently waiting until the other person who got "4" arrived.

You heard footsteps approaching you from behind, and before you turned around, you mentally prayed to every god that is wasn't Nao. You inhaled and held your breath, turning your body around to reveal who it was.

"Y/N?" Sunoo called, his eyebrows slightly raising, and though there was a part of you that felt disappointed, you also felt relieved that it was Sunoo out of all people.

"Sunoo?" you smiled, feeling thankful. You sputtered out an obvious question, "What are you doing here?".

He replied, "Well, someone needed help coming here because he insisted he'd get 'lost'".

Your eyebrows raised in confusion at his answer, not knowing what he meant as you heard more footsteps behind Sunoo. You peeked over Sunoo's shoulder and saw Ni-ki walking towards the two of you. Your eyes widened and you immediately straightened yourself.

You whisper-shouted, "Are you for real? He's my partner?!".

He gave you a smug look, "Have fun", then leaning into your ear, "Make the most out of it".

Your face immediately redenned and you pushed Sunoo away, earning chuckles from him as he stepped away and centred himself between you and Ni-ki, who set to a stop in front of you.

"Here's your location, and your partner," Sunoo announced, looking at Ni-ki.

Ni-ki was staring at you, probably feeling as stunned as you. "You're telling me I have to spend my New Years with this.. dork?!".

"Excuse me?! You're the even bigger dork!" "Says the one who almost woke everyone up a while ago!".

Your bickering was instantly placed to a halt when Sunoo firmly grasped each of your shoulders, leaning forward and speaking in an almost.. threatening tone. "I'm not responsible for any of you if you two die or end up in a situation".

You two gulped as you felt the tension in Sunoo's voice, not wanting to irritate him further. You froze as if the sound of your breathing could annoy him. Seeing that the two of you complied after a period of silence, he released the grip on your shoulders and flashed an innocent smile, almost as if he didn't threaten the two of you just a second ago.

"Now I have to find my partner and I might be late because of a certain someone," Sunoo shot a glare at Ni-ki, who was awkwardly avoiding eye contact and scratching his neck.

His smile returned and he greeted before leaving, "Okay, bye guys!".

When Sunoo left, the two of you were left in a state of shock.

"That dude's kinda scary...." Ni-ki commented, his facial expression as if he had just seen a ghost. "Y-yeah.. I never knew he was like that," you added on, feeling slightly traumatised.

You'd hope that the normal you was out, being able to converse with him before you discovered the fact that you had feelings for him, but luck wasn't on your side. You were constantly thinking through before you spoke, only saying the filtered out words, making you seem painfully awkward.

You two were holding ice cream that you bought from the food trucks at the side of the streets, and you both were walking side by side down the streets.

"Isn't this flavour great?" Ni-ki questioned. "Y-yeah. Love it," you stammered, mentally cursing yourself for it as you bit your lip.

Ni-ki stopped and sighed, making you stop walking as well.

"Are you kidding me?" he shot and you immediately felt confused.

"I literally got you vanilla. The flavour you hated? And you didn't even curse me out, or even point it out?! Now you're saying you love it?" Ni-ki ranted, obviously feeling over it with your unusualness.

You immediately snap back to reality and look at your ice cream cone, and eventually confirmed that it was vanilla, and you indeed had a strong hatred for vanilla. You immediately screamed and drop your ice cream cone, the ice cream splattering on the ground and your gaze averted to him with widened eyes.

"Gosh, are you finally back?" he squatted down and picked up your cone, taking out tissues from his sling bag to clean up your mess as much as he can. You remained silent, afraid that anything you said would've given you away.

He'd finished up cleaning your mess as he stood back up, looking at you with a sour expression as he held up your dropped ice cream cone and the dirty tissues that were soaked in vanilla ice cream. You nervously glanced away and he only sighed.

"Was I not the partner you wanted? Is that why you're like this?".

"Absolutely not!" you shot back immediately. "It's just.." you tried to find words to explain yourself without giving yourself away, "you look really ugly right now".

He scoffed, but instead of continuing the banter with him, he only sighed and patted your head, "There she is, welcome back".

You looked into his eyes and saw his soft gaze, causing your heart to skip a beat. You immediately frowned and sucked one side of your cheek, turning your body away from him. "You're so annoying".

"And you're weird as fuck. This is exactly why I 'shit-talked' you that day," he giggled.

"Hey! That was really mean!"

It was about an hour left before the New Years, and you'd eventually relaxed around Ni-ki, returning back to your usual self though there was this lingering feeling that made your chest tighten that you tried to brush away desperately.

You noticed Ni-ki to your right looking at the city lights, admiring the view as a big smile was plastered across his face. You softly smiled to yourself, pulling out your phone camera before snapping a photo of him, not realising that your phone would've made a loud 'click!' sound. Ni-ki immediately snaps his neck towards you, realising your antics as you immediately giggle and turn your back on him, making it harder for him to get your phone.

"Hey! That was my bad side!" he whined, trying to grab the phone from you, and you only looked at the photo in awe as you continue giggling, enjoying his reactions.

"What're you talking about? You look really handsome here," you commented, not realising you said that out loud. He was immediately shunned, not believing his ears as you continued to analyse the photo. You continue, "Say, you've never had someone take these types of photos for you right?".

He immediately steps back, clearing his throat and trying to hide the blush on his cheeks, "Yeah, no.."

You looked up at him, "'Cause you never had a girlfriend, right?!".

He immediately rolled his eyes as you struck a sensitive part of his heart, his ego being slightly shattered as you bring up the fact. "Whatever," he brushed off.

"Wait, seriously?! I was joking, y'know?!"

"You've literally been my best friend my entire life how do you not know?"

"I've always seen girls hit on you and you hang out with them, y'know?! Were you not dating them?!".

"Do you see me hang out with them more than 2 times?!"

You were immediately silenced as you tried to recall the moments that he did hang out with the other girls, and no, he definitely did not hang out with any of them more than 2 times.

"That's right!" he continued, standing his point.

"I just assumed you kept it a secret 'cos you were shy and—"

"I never keep secrets!" he huffed out and you could tell me was more irritated than usual. "What about you, huh?! You have a crush on someone and you never told me?!"

"HUH?!?!" you yell out, thinking you were caught.

He continued, "Don't act dumb! During that truth or dare you admitted it!".

You sighed in relief, feeling thankful that he didn't catch on, "Thank God..".

"The fuck you thanking God for?!" he spat. You remained quiet as you observed him place his hands on his hips and take small steps in a circle to soothe his anger, "You're unbelievable".

A part of you was afraid, but a part of you wanted to confess. To express yourself. To tell him all your secrets. But you were so afraid that you'd ruin everything. You were so afraid that he wouldn't feel the same way and reject you.

But, the part of you wanting to confess became bigger, seeing how he was so desperate to find out who your crush was.

You closed your eyes and sighed, your heart thumping as you made your final decision. "I'll tell you on New Years".

"What?" his head immediately shot up.

"New Years. During the countdown. I'll tell you".

He scoffed, "Finally, you're being a decent human being for once".

"Says you?!" you immediately felt taken aback, placing your fists in a fighting stance, ready to punch him and almost regretting that this was the very person that you loved.

There was 5 minutes until the New Years, and you two were sitting on a bench at the park, patiently waiting until it was time. You sat there, feeling like your heart was going to explode as you come to a realisation that you were going to confess. Confess your feelings to your very best friend, and you were enjoying his company before it could all possibly change for the worst.

You kicked your legs in the air, leaning forward as your palms layed flat on the bench, blowing out air from your puffed out cheeks as you tried to calm yourself down.

It was gonna be okay, right? It's just a simple 'I like you', right?

"Y'know you can just say it now, right?" Ni-ki complained.

"Shut up!" you snapped, wishing you liked someone more tolerable like Sunoo. You commented, "You're so annoying, and I hope you know that".

"Thanks for the constant reassurance, Y/N, I hear that from you everyday," he scoffed.

You two continued to banter until he interrupted you, "Shut up! The countdown is starting!".

You choked out, not being ready to confess your very feelings.

"10.. 9.."

Fuck fuck fuck, you weren't ready!

"8.. 7.."

Fuck it. Fuck it!

"6.. 5.."

You didn't even have time to plan how you were going to say it!

Y'know what?

"4.. 3.." you chanted alongside with him, "Actually, y'know what? Fuck it! I like you!".

And as you finished your sentence, the fireworks immediately went off, the bright colours lighting up the dark sky. Loud cheers and celebrations that can be heard from the city near your park and you simply sighed, feeling the weight in your chest finally being released after God-knows-how-long. You stared at the fireworks, watching how it explodes, splits to smaller sparks, feeling his gaze at you.

"Ni-ki, look, the fireworks".

"You mean that?" he asked out of the blue, his tone serious as you turned to look at him. His face was stern and unreadable. You couldn't tell if he was happy, or disgusted, or whatever.

"What do you think? You think I say that for fun?" your tone was light and fun, feeling relieved you finally let it out. "Just answer the question, damnit!" he snarled, making you feel taken-aback.

"Okay, yes, fine! I like you! I said it. I mean it. What, are you not happy? What, are you gunna reject me, huh?!" you spilled out your thoughts as you snapped back at him, feeling irritated that he was reacting this way. What was his deal?!

He sighed and leaned back on the bench. "Do you ever wonder why I haven't dated any of the girls you mentioned?".

"C'mon, if you're gunna reject me just directly say—" "Because I like you!"

Features of shock immediately took over your face, not believing what you were hearing. He.. liked.. you?

"I liked you the entire damn time! Even before we became close, okay?!" he ranted, his voice sounding desperate as he confessed to you.

"Remember that time I was 'shit-talking' you in the field?! Thankfully you missed out on the part where I said I liked you!" he continued, his anger spilling out.

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. He liked you. He liked you back. He felt the same way about you. You were silent as you stared at him feeling apalled. Finding all of this amusing and not knowing how to respond, you broke into a soft chuckle.

"What's so funny?! What, now are you rejecting me?!"

"Dork," you teased.

"What?" "You're a dork. A dork for me," you teased further and you watched as his face grew red.

"You never know how to shut your mouth!"

This was the last thing you expected, but the best outcome that could've played out. You walked beside Ni-ki, hand in hand as you noticed the lively atmosphere of the crowd since it was the new year. He held your hand tightly and pulled you closer to him as you both try to make way through the crowd, instinctively guarding you as someone gets too close.

"Protective over me, huh?" you teased, enjoying how flustered he gets.

"I will literally leave you right here if you say another word," he shot a glare at you, the tips of his ears turning to a light shade of pink.

"It's okay, I like the way your hand feels on mine," you smirked, watching how he looks away and purses his lips, clearly trying to act nonchalant.

"Whatever you want," he clears his throat and straightens his posture, softly tugging at your hand before continuing to walk again.

As you two continued walking, you spotted another ice cream food truck and you immediately pulled on his hand, "Look, another ice cream truck!".

"Do you want another one?" he asked, knowing you'd already say yes.

"Yup!". At the sound of your approval, he was about to start walking to the truck but you stood in front of him.

"Nuh uh, I'll get this myself, I feel bad that you paid and cleaned up my ice crem earlier, so I'll do it," you insisted, feeling ashamed and not wanting to burden him further.

"No I'll—" "No. You stay." your voice fierce and stern, causing Ni-ki to nod in compliance and quietten down.

You smiled before patting his shoulder and making a turn for the truck.

He mumbled to himself, "God, is Sunoo and her siblings or something..?".

He folded his arms, tapping his feet as he looked around the area, subconsciously searching for your figure which was nowhere to be found. He sucked his inner cheek as he grew more nervous, wondering why you were taking so long to just get ice cream. He sighed as he started to make a move towards the ice cream shop, his eyes wandering in search for you but to no avail.

He slowly started to panic more, his pace hastening as he approached the ice cream truck owner, "Have you seen a beautiful girl in a black hoodie?".

"Oh, the lady who bought chocolate ice cream? Yeah she was—"

"Where is she?" Ni-ki tapped his feet repetitively, feeling the panic rise. The shop owner seemed slightly stunned, but raised his finger to point to a direction, "There, I think".

Ni-ki gave a quick nod and eyebrow raise before going to the said direction, constantly turning his head and bumping people in search for you. His breathing rate started to accelerate as he started overthinking about things that could've happened to you. He started to jog, and as soon as he was about to call out for you, he heard it.

Your laugh.

He turned his head to the same direction and he spotted you. In his eyes, it was almost like a spotlight was shone directly at you from the way his eyes focused on you and you only. Ni-ki stared at you with his jaw dropped as he watched you laugh to another girl, the melody of your laugh sounding like music to his ears.

He was rooted to his spot, completely in awe as his gaze was locked on you. You weren't even doing anything, you were just laughing, wearing your stupid black hoodie and being the dork you were, but it made his head spin.

If only you knew how you made him feel.

People bumped his shoulder, making their way past him and he simply stood there before you felt his stare and you turned around, forming eye contact through the crowd of people.

Your eyes crinkled while you beamed as you raised your hand, "Ni-ki! Over here!".

Ni-ki was immediately brought back to reality, his eyes wandering as he finally realised what was happening around him. He cleared his throat and made way to you and the other girl.

As he arrived, he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and looked at the other girl. He frowned, finding her familiar as he leaned forward, trying to get a better look at her as he tried to recall where he saw her.

"Jake's girl?!" his jaw dropped and his head leaned forward as he felt flabbergasted that Sabrina was here as well.

"I-is that my nickname now?" Sabrina giggled, covering her mouth with her hand, finding the whole situation amusing. "Jake and I was here and I just so happened to spot Y/N," she continued.

"Is that Niks and Y/N?!" a voice emerged from behind Sabrina, and a guy's hand snaked around Sabrina's waist, revealing Jake who's hair was slightly messed up from how the wind was blowing.

"Jake!" you greeted, feeling ecstatic that there was more of you. You continued while giggling, "Happy New Year, lovebirds".

Jake broke eye contact and his gaze started wandering around, giving it away that he was flustered and Sabrina simply cackled, "We're not the only ones, right?". She eyed you and Ni-ki, her eyebrows wiggling as she observed how he pulled you close to him.

Ni-ki glanced at you to see how you'd respond and you immediately rolled your eyes, "This dumbass hasn't asked yet, but he's such a big dork for me".

He gasped, "Me? A dumbass AND a dork? Seriously you have something in your head!".

"You too have something in your head!" you shot back, "And it's me~".

"God, one day I'll tape your mouth shut!"

You and Ni-ki continued to bicker, and Jake and Sabrina looked at each other, exchanging smug and knowing looks and shrugged, knowing your whole situation and predicting everything from the start of the trip.

You jumped onto your bed, laying on your back as you stared at the ceiling. You'd return from the trip almost a week ago, and you thought that you could do more trips or have more outings with the rest but everyone else was busy. You shifted a pillow below your head, taking your phone from the edge of your bed and hoping to see that one name but to no avail.

Jungwon was tutoring students as a part time job. Sunghoon was working part time at a diner. Jake had other plans — well — with Sabrina. Sunoo was busy preparing for the next semester already.

And Ni-ki? There wasn't really a reason. At least not one of you could figure it out.

After processing that you and your best friend had taken the next step, everything started to kick in. You were afraid of what was going to happen. Was he going to ask you out? Will he keep things casual? Will you and him still be normal friends?

You didn't contact him at all, in hopes that he'd initiate first, but it was the same for him. No texts, no calls, not even invites to games or the arcade.

You were starting to regret everything. If you hadn't confessed, would you and him be how it was like?

Your mind flashed to the time he confessed.

'Because I like you! I liked you the entire damn time! Even before we became close, okay?!'

You flipped to your stomach and screamed to your pillow, feeling your heart race and your thoughts go everywhere. You couldn't stop thinking about him and it was driving you insane.

He did say he liked you back, but was he really being serious? Did he say that in the heat of moment or to please you? You didn't know. And the fact that you two weren't communicating was driving you nuts.

You exhaled, giving up trying to think things through and you slowly felt your sanity slip away. You were about to slip into unconsciousness until you heard loud knocks on your window. You froze, thinking that there was a burglar.

You pushed yourself off the bed, staring out of the dark window as your hand rummaged through your table, holding anything that could defend you which was apparently a hair straightener.

You slowly approached the window, taking quiet and cautious steps as you frowned, watching the window. You opened the window and saw a wild Ni-ki, causing you to yell but he immediately shut you up by slapping a small snip of tape on your mouth. It was almost as if he'd predicted this and prepared to shut you up.

You peered at him, remaining rooted to your bedroom floor as you froze, not knowing what to do and not being able to say anything.. literally.

You sighed and you relaxed, letting the hair straightener fall to your side and you rip out the tape from your mouth, slightly hissing from the rip. Lifting up the tape beside your face, "Seriously? Tape?".

He giggled, "I did say I'd shut you up with tape one time, did I not?".

You glared at him and he slowly peeked behind him, gripping onto the side of your window tighter, "C-can you let me in? I might fall any second..".

"I might just kick you".

He sat on your carpet, his legs crossed as you sat on the edge of your bed, your arms folded as you frowned your brows at him. "What're doing here, huh?" you interrogated him, his appearance being so sudden it almost irritated you.

"I wanted to see you," he replied honestly.

You waved your hands towarrds him, "No, nah, nuh-uh, don't give me that bullshit — it makes me nervous". You continued, "Don't you have a curfew?".

"Well, I can't get into trouble if my mom doesn't know I'm out, right?" he snickered, feeling like he was the coolest person in the world and you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

"You're ridiculous," you spat, pulling yourself in more towards the bed as you layed down, your back resting against the headboard. "What do you want? I know you're not just here to piss me off," you gnarled.

"Look, I know why you're pissed, okay? I came here to talk about it," he calmly informs you, his big doe eyes pleading you to cool off.

You remained silent for a second before you huffed out, sitting up straight. He requested, "Can you sit in front of me, please?".

You whined, trying to negotiate that you and him can just talk like this but he insisted, so you eventually requested, "Get on my bed".

He nods and he complies, sitting on your bed with his legs crossed, directly opposite of you. You stared at him, your arms folded. "So what now?".

"I mean everything I said," he suddenly spoke, catching you off-guard. "I've liked you before we became friends, up till now. I did tell my friend that I liked you on the field. I rejected every other girl and said that I liked you," he confessed.

You stared at him, struggling to find words to respond with. You bit your inner cheek, watching his vulnerable state.

"I'm sorry that I haven't contacted you, I know you must've had difficulties sleeping—" "Excuse you! You're flattering yourself! I would never lose sleep because of you!" you shot, but the two of you knew you were lying from how you had heavy eyebags even during break.

He rolled his eyes and held your face, causing you to wiggle back, "What're you—!" "What are these, then?" he caressed your eyebags with his thumb, tilting his head and looking at you with a soft gaze as he leaned in closer.

You pouted and huffed, looking away. "I hope you know you're selfish for being the reason I can't get any sleep," you mumbled, feeling sulky that he caught you.

The corners of his mouth dropped as he continued to caress you gently, "I'm sorry".

"You're apologising so much it's so weird," you mumbled, barely audible that Riki almost didn't catch it.

"I know, right?" he leaned back, his arms on the mattress and the warmth on your cheek disappearing, disappointment washing over you.

"So what? You apologise, then what?" you frowned, feeling impatient.

"Can you zip your mouth and let me do things how I envisioned it in my head?" he shot, his sassy side coming out again.

You giggled as you leaned backwards on your hands, looking at him and raising your eyebrows, "Okay, do things your way then. What did you plan to do now?".

He blurted, "This is the part where I ask you to be my—". You raised one eyebrow at him and he stopped himself. "Wait, no, I'm not supposed to tell you that. Wait, shit."

You burst out laughing at his awkwardness, his next move making this whole situation more hilarious. He checked his palm as if he had written his entire plan there.

"Don't tell me you wrote it on your palm? Lemme see!" you immediately crawled to him and grabbed his wrist, trying to see. "No! get away!" he resisted, trying to pull his hand back and prevent you from seeing it.

"No way! You actually did!" you read his palm as he eventually gave up trying to hide it. He sighed loudly and glared at you. You had the best laugh in the longest time, and his ego shattered more for each second it lasted.

Tears were forming from how hard you were laughing, your stomach starting to hurt, but through your tears you noticed his sulky expression, causing you to cool down and wipe your tears, "Okay I'm sorry, do whatever you wanna do next".

He rolled his eyes, before clearing his throat to shoot the question, "Y/N, will you—".

His speech was interrupted from you making a drum roll on your lap, and he simply stopped halfway into the speech, staring at you in disbelief and you cleared your throat, feeling guilty.

"Sorry".

"Gosh, I can't believe you're the one I like," he snarled, his expression annoyed.

Your stomach felt tingly at his comment, the corners of your mouth curling upwards.

"Y/N, will you pay for my gam—" "Yes!" you answered in excitement, but your smile immediately dropped realising what he actually asked.

It was his turn to snicker and you lifted your fist, threatening to punch him as he had his own laughing session.

"God, that was hilarious, Y/N will you be my girlfriend?" he asked in the midst of laughing, catching you off-guard as your jaw drops and you completely freeze.

He wiped his eyes then realised the state you were in, "C'mon, you already knew I was going to ask, what's the problem?".

"Well, duh! But I didn't know you'd just ask that so suddenly!" you complained, sulking that he asked when you leet your guard down. You demanded, "Ask again! But in a more serious tone!".

"You're a needy one, aren't you?" he commented as he shifted himself to be more comfortable and straightened his back. You look at him with a proud look, waiting for the question to come out.

"Y/N," he whispered, "Will you be my girlfriend?".

"YAY!!" a loud voice emerges from outside your room and someone falls into your room. You two immediately looked at your door, not knowing what the hell was going on and to your surprise, you saw your mom and dad.

"Honey! You didn't have to push me!" your dad complained, rubbing his hip as he layed on the floor.

"I got too excited, sorry honey!" your mom apologised as she clapped her hands and looked at the two of you.

Your turned your head to Ni-ki, your jaw remaining agape in disbelief and not feeling comfortable to do anything else. You turned your head back to your parents, "God! What's wrong with the 2 of you! It's literally—" your eyes flickered to your clock "1am! Aren't you guys supposed to be sleeping for work tomorrow?!".

You nagged at your parents for eavesdropping the conversation between you and Ni-ki and eventually managed to get them back to their rooms after lots of nagging and scolding. Your parents begged to listen but you stood your point and made them comply.

You dusted your hands as you returned to the spot you were sitting in front of Riki before you got interrupted by your parents. You sighed, "You can continue, I hope you didn't forget what to say next".

"I mean, it gave me more time to rehearse, but you haven't answered the question yet".

"What questio—" you asked, being forgetful after being so overwhelmed by your parents but immediately recalled it, "OHHHHH".

"You remember now, huh?" he mocked you.

You hummed, before requesting, "Ask again".

"Seriously? I already asked twice. Twice!"

"Third times a charm, right? And both times weren't good," you waved your hands at him, brushing him off and he scoffed.

"Gosh," he huffed. "For the last fucking time Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?" he put his hand on top of yours, trying to make the whole situation romantic despite how irritated he felt.

"Mmmm," you pretended to think to tease him, and as soon as you were about to continue teasing him..

"If you give me that 'I'll respond in a few business days' bullshit I'll literally kiss you," he threatened.

"Oh..? But what if I want that kiss?" you smirked, challenging him.

"God, you're so fucking annoying," he muttered before cupping your cheeks and leaning in, smashing both of your lips together. He got you again when you lowered your guard, but instead of pushing him away, you simply lived in the moment.

Your heart was racing from how you were literally kissing your best friend, and you immediately kissed him back.

The kiss was soft and gentle at first, his movements slow as if he was testing the waters but his passion grew as his kiss eventually became more passionate, his hands lowering to your waist to pull you closer to him. His nose nudged yours, and one of his hands was brought up to your face, tilting your head to give him more access.

Your mind went blank as you melted into the kiss, never wanting this kiss to end as you finally felt like you won in life. Your hands gripped his shirt tightly, attempting to pull him impossibly closer.

As you both grew breathless, he eventually pulled back, his eyes directly staring into yours.

"Still need a few business days to decide?" he asked as he tried to catch his breath.

"No need, 'cos my answer's yes," you gave in, finally making things official. He huffed and pulled you into a hug, feeling all his anger for you slip away. "Look, on a serious note, I feel like I'm not good enough for you, but I'll be better for you, I promise," he pulled away, holding your shoulders and grinning at you.

"You're soo romantic, y'know?" you sarcastically remarked, a light smile on your face, "You come to my house in the middle of the night, spilling your heart out to me after we haven't spoken for like a week".

"At least I'm fun and different, 'kay?" he defended himself, his hands in the air like he was surrendering.

"Whatever, dork," you giggled, scooching closer to him.

"Your dork?" he rested his hands on your waist as he lifted and sat you on his lap. "My dork," you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him in until your lips collided again.

Walking into school with him wasn't unusual. What was unusual was that you and Ni-ki had your hands interlocked, causing everyone to look at you in shock. Whispers could be heard from every corner of the hallway, everyone being flabbergasted that the 2 friends who argued relentlessly were now hand in hand like a lovey dovey couple.

'Just what happened over the holidays?' 'Woah, this is the last thing I expected!' 'Didn't Nao like him? Shit, quick - take a photo of them!'

Your friend group was leaning on the lockers, their eyes glued onto the two of you, enjoying the performance that you and Ni-ki had put up for the school. Sunghoon nudged Jungwon and laughed as he noticed your proud expression as you two walked towards them.

"What happened, huh? Did you hit your heads when you went home after the trip?" Sunghoon teased as you two approached.

"Who knows?" Ni-ki shrugged, glancing at you and grinning.

You were having lunch, laughing as per usual with the others when Ni-ki suddenly leaned into your ear and whispered, "I like you".

Your face immediately heats up and your chest tightens, your untensils dropping as you smack Ni-ki's chest for teasing you, "Shut up!".

He laughed at your reaction, finding you adorable as he leaned on your shoulder, "I love you, Y/N".

The others rolled their eyes and pretended to puke and gag, finding the whole lovey-dovey situation disgusting and you sighed, not being able to resist him.

"I love you too".

thank you for reading till the end! show your support by liking, reblogging and commenting! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

announcement i dont know if you guys saw my other post but i'm going to take a break to focus on my school and life cos things are very hectic even if school hasn't reopened! thank you guys for the amount of love ya'll have shown me, i will forever be grateful and i will definitely come back and make more fics like this cos i find so much joy in writing. will be back in like late feb or march. but ill defo be logging in every once in a while!

taglist (love u guys) @roarr-ki @rikifever @pjselee @firstclassjaylee @adoredbyjay @ancnymcnzjy @kangseulgithegreat @sugarikiz @rikidaze @saphiranishimurashan @celestiai0 @rairaiblog @chxriz-mxr @kerbearpriv @sasfransisco @miukidoll

[sanguinesmi1e]

A Round Door Like a Porthole, Lazarus Green Pt. 1 Pt. 2 (you're here) Pt. 3 Pt. 4

Art of LBM

Danny was still lying under the Specter Speeder, mind reeling as the words “they opened this portal with a child sacrifice, and bound his death and all the lost life potential to their bloody machine to create a perpetual gateway to the Infinite Realms” ran in a loop through his head. Could that really be true? Is his death attached to the portal, forever lodged in the doorway, preventing it from closing?

The guy clearly knew what he was talking about. The bit about why his ghost friends and frenemies caused so much chaos as they unleashed their obsessions on Amity Park made so much sense. It would certainly explain a lot of his interactions with ghosts after he died. 

 Danny silently cursed himself for not destroying everything in the lab before they got here. He and Jazz hadn't worried about the portal schematics, because they honestly didn't have any way to open a portal, only cycle energy in a recursive loop that shouldn’t have done anything. No one, not he and Jazz, not their parents, not Tucker or Technus, had been able to figure out why it had worked when Danny was inside. But if the machine was able to sustain a portal that was already opened. . . He wondered idly if he could light a fire that looked accidental and would both destroy the lab and leave the two men enough time to escape. It’d probably be too risky. And who knew what destroying the portal would do to him. Fully kill him? Destroy him completely and shatter his core? It might be worth it to prevent anyone from gaining this knowledge. 

No wonder Lex Luthor was interested in this business. A child was murdered in this basement, and for all Tim knew, the child’s soul could still be trapped here fueling a Lazarus Pit that connected the world of the living to the afterlife. What Luthor could do with an interdimensional portal or even a single sample of Lazarus water. . . Tim shuddered to think.

On the one hand, he was grateful that Wayne Enterprises secured the business before Luthor had the chance. On the other hand, he felt rather ill to think his family had directly enriched mad scientists who performed child sacrifices. At least he had full faith that between him and Oracle, they’d hunt the Fentons down and make sure justice was served.

“What is to be done for the child?” Tim asked Constantine. “Is his soul tied to that machine?”

“I don’t think so. I’m pretty sure it’s just his death.” 

“You’re gonna have to explain the difference to me, ‘cause I’m not sure I see the distinction.” Tim said wryly. 

“I guess. . . Hm. You could think of it as the moment of transition drawn out endlessly like a plucked string whose note never stops vibrating. Like life is the anchor point of one end of the string, and the afterlife is at the other end, and the child’s death is the note created when his soul crosses from one side to the other. The soul is the bow causing reverberations, but the reverberations are the actual death itself. The effect of the soul’s passage. And in this case, the portal is amplifying the death so it doesn’t end like a normal death ‘note’ would.” Constantine leaned in to examine some of the runes that were part of the array. “Not a perfect metaphor, obviously, since you bow perpendicular rather than parallel to the string, and death and souls are nothing like music, but you get the idea, right?”

Tim was still caught on John Constantine saying the words “death note” together unironically in a sentence. He was going to have to share that with Steph later. Maybe with the whole family group chat, even. “Yeah, the metaphor makes sense, as much as any of this occult stuff does to me.”

“Whatever. As for whether there’s anything we can do for the child, I think we’ll have to try and summon him if we can.” The Brit started pulling items out of his trenchcoat’s inner pockets. “We need to ask what the spirit wants done, before we go messing with things we don’t understand.”

“Alright, need anything from me?”

“Yeah, move this stuff out of the way so I can draw a circle.” Constantine directed Tim to shove aside a few stacks of boxes, something called a Fenton Ghost Weasel, and together they shifted a coffin-shaped iron maiden that for some reason was labeled Fenton Stockades. Then he set to work chalking a circle and runes on the ground.

Finally he sat back and dusted chalk off his hands. “That should do it.”

“Will this be bright too?” Tim asked warily.

“Eh, might be? Shouldn’t be too bad.”

Tim grabbed an auto-darkening welding helmet with a green “Fenton” sticker on it off the workbench and slipped it on.

“Alright, here goes.” Constantine began the summoning ritual.

While Danny debated arson, the other two had finished clearing a space and chalked some kind of circle onto the floor. He tuned back into the conversation when he heard the trenchcoat guy begin a traditional incantation for a summoning. Were they trying to summon him? Danny really hoped it wouldn’t work. 

When people tried to summon the Ghost King he could almost always ignore the pull. This pull, however, was very strong and immediate. It seemed proximity made a difference, or this guy was just better at summonings than the average cultist. Before Danny could accept the inevitable, he was pulled bodily — literally! — out from under the vehicle and across the floor, still flat on his back on the Fenton Under Car Creeper, with the Specter Speeder’s ecto-engine hugged tightly to his chest. The wheels of the Fenton Creeper (not to be mistaken with the Fenton Anti-Creep Stick) sped him straight to the summoning circle. Still very much in human form. 

This was his first real look at the guy called Constantine, and he couldn’t help a horrified yelp. “Eugh!! What the fuck is wrong with you, dude!?!!” 

His lapse in attention made him lose the battle with the summoning spell, and it gripped him, pulling him through the convolutions of the spellwork even though he was already lying half across the circle, and forcing him to change into Phantom in the process. It was such a disgusting sensation, like he was one of those squishy water filled tube snake toys that look like a fleshlight, and someone squeezed really hard and abruptly so he turned inside out and went flying to go splat against a wall (or in this case, against the ground inside the circle of chalk). He tried and failed not to retch.

The younger man in the crisp suit whom he’d already identified as Mr. CEO-Timothy-Drake-Wayne looked at him in startled bafflement, while the older blond, still smoking his cigarette, (gross, and was that thing never ending?) was probably looking at him. Maybe. It was really difficult to tell, because he was a frankly vile sight. Danny winced and swallowed down nausea. “What have you done to your soul?”

“I — what?”

“Trypophobia central, man! Ugh that’s gotta be the grossest thing I’ve ever seen. Can’t you cover it up?”

“Who are you?” Timothy Drake-Wayne interjected.

“I’m the dead guy? You literally just summoned me.”

“Constantine said you were a child”

“I mean, I was?” Danny looked down at his obviously twenty-something year-old self and rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s been a while since I was fourteen though. These things happen.”

“Not typically, no. The dead tend to be pretty unaging.” Constantine said. 

“Dude I’m not having a conversation with you while your soul looks like Escher’s swiss cheese nightmare. Anyways, some of us do. Heck, I know a guy who constantly shifts from infant to old man and every stage in between. It’s pretty distracting when you’re trying to get him to let you fix the timeline again.” Danny continued to look anywhere but at the blond man. “But if it’s so important to you, I can —” He got an abstracted look, and slowly de-aged himself until the two men stood over a fourteen year old boy with snow white hair and glowing green eyes.

“That does not help. No.” The guy whose soul looked somewhat like a bleeding tooth fungus said. He turned away and started doing something magical. Danny hoped it would mask his soul in some way, but so far all it did was make Danny feel like he needed to pop his ears.

He also felt particularly uncharitable, so he didn’t revert to his natural age, and instead tried to see how young and cute he could make himself appear.

“So are you just haunting this basement? Seems hazardous, given the former proprietors.” Timothy tried to redirect the conversation. He didn’t seem nearly as distressed to see the ghost of a child, but his eyes darted surreptitiously to the Lichtenberg figure Danny used to always hide under gloves.

“Nah, haven’t been back here in years. I mostly live in my Infinite Realms haunt these days.”

“You . . . live? Is that just a figure of speech?”

“It’s rude to ask about a ghost’s nonliving status, you know. Highly taboo to ask how a ghost died or poke into the circumstances of our deaths without permission.” Danny admonished. Making himself younger than fourteen took more effort than he expected.

“Alright, I’m sorry,” Timothy raised his hands placatingly to the boy who now looked younger than Damian. “What brings you back to Amity Park?”

“Uh, you summoned me? Are we still not clear on that?”

Tim looked pointedly at the Fenton Creeper and the engine Danny still held. He’d shrunk down to the size of a four year old, and the engine really should be crushing him given it was bigger than his torso now. He quickly set it aside, and turned his biggest puppy dog eyes on Tim.

“You were in here already, and you looked pretty alive for a moment there.”

“I can look lots of ways!” Danny focused really hard on looking as cute, small, and nonthreatening as possible. He thought it was working when all of a sudden there was a pop! and he was smaller than he’d ever managed before. 

Timothy Drake-Wayne looked like a giant. The other guy, who had thankfully managed to put away his soul somehow, wore scuffed oxfords bigger than Danny. Hell, he could probably fit his entire self into one of Constantine’s shoes if that wasn’t a bizarre thing to do, and they weren’t already full of stinky feet. Holy shit what happened to him!?

Tim blinked down at the cat? Snake? Ghost. . . thing at his feet. What the fuck. A moment ago he was talking to an adult man whom he’s pretty sure was dead and he’s very sure was trolling them. Now his interlocutor had turned into an adorable creature with soft white paws, a long twisting tail, big pointed ears that swiveled like a cats, and a humanoid face that should’ve been creepy but was actually eliciting cute-aggression in him. Tim blinked again. The little baby ghost creature blinked enormous green eyes back at him. Then it yawned, revealing three rows of needle sharp teeth that looked like a cross between what you’d find in the mouth of a shark and a cat. Yikes.

“Does that mean the interview is over?” Tim asked him.

The creature just blinked up at him again, then zeroed in on his shoelaces, pupils expanding until only a narrow band of green ringed them.

Yup. The interview was over. Those paws hid some wicked claws which could apparently slice through leather with ease. Oh, Tim really hoped ghost scratch fever wasn’t a thing. At least the ghost looked sufficiently contrite after he yelped, and it waited while he removed a shoelace to sacrifice as a toy.

If Damian ever met him, there would be a new member of the family. Maybe he should name the creature preemptively so they didn’t have a cat-snake named Bat-Ghost in Wayne manor. 

“Do you have a name, little baby cat-snake ghost? Little baby ghost man?” He cooed as the miniature monster dashed back and forth, intent on shredding his shoelace.

The ghost paused long enough to chirp, “Li’l baby man!” before launching himself at the string. Even shocked, Tim’s reflexes had him whisking the toy out of the way, and the ghost went careening under a cabinet.

He wedged himself in the gap, landing face first in a dust bunny, and quickly wriggled backwards with an indignant squall. His wordless protestations cut off as he fell into a violent sneezing fit that thankfully dislodged him from beneath the cabinet.

Tim suppressed his laugh, and asked, “Little Baby Man? Is that what you want to be called?”

The ghost pawed most of the dust away from his nose, but spider webs covered his face and a big dust bunny perched atop his head like a fascinator with a cobweb lace veil. He looked Tim right in the eyes and nodded, dislodging the dust in his hair and setting off more sneezes.

“Li’l Baby Man” he confirmed. He placed a paw on Tim’s shoe and chirped, “Tim!” Then he pointed his tail at Constantine and said, “Gross!” with narrowed eyes.