#and the line about being the butterfly? tears immediately

[quevadilla]

"it's time to unlearn that lesson" what if I cried.

[bbydoll18xx]

She’s Such a Good Girl (Part 2)

Paige continues her assault on your innocence, leading you to spiral.

Paige Bueckers x reader

Word Count: 2.7k

Themes: angst in the beginning, Paige being hot and flirty the rest of it woohoo, mentions of being horny oops

Part 1 - You move in across the hall from Paige Bueckers. It doesn’t take long before she tries to shatter your innocent persona. And you just let her.

Masterlist

A/N: I’m so, so grateful for all the love on the first part of this little mini series. Let me know if you are up for a third part:)) I have soo many ideas it's ridiculous

~

You wake up feeling anything but well rested. Your sleep was muddled with dreams of Paige, her smile infiltrating your unconsciousness until you woke up with an uncomfortable stickiness in between your thighs. You groan into your pillow, the general overwhelmingness of last night draining you even more.

Grabbing your phone from your bedside table, you see a text from Paige, and the butterflies erupt inside of you once more. 

‘We’re all planning on going out tonight. You’re coming with us.’

Her bluntness momentarily stuns you, but you were grateful to be included. It seemed she was hell bent on getting you out of your shell, for whatever reason, and you were simply just going to concede. You needed this.

You respond, your heart beating out of your chest, and the anxiety begins to set in. 

It was getting harder and harder to deny the gay feelings you had. And although it had been years since your “oh shit, I’m gay,” moment had dawned on you, this was reaching new heights of awareness. But you had refused to truly accept it thus far.

You had a complicated relationship with your sexuality. Most of the time you had shied away from even acknowledging it; it was too painful. In high school, you were surrounded by other gay people, and it felt like you almost belonged, slowly coming to terms with your sapphism. But as you moved away to college, you were the only one in your friend group who was even a little remotely queer, and you felt isolated by your glaring differences. 

Your religious upbringing did not help the situation either. You quickly learned how to hide your emotions. Slurs were regularly thrown around the dinner table, the nasty words cutting into your being, and your fists would be tightening in your lap, fighting to keep a neutral expression on your face.

You could not give yourself away.

As soon as you could, you’d seek solace in your room, hot, shameful tears sliding down your cheeks, forcing yourself to quiet the sobs erupting through your chest. The words of contempt echoed through your mind, until eventually you had nearly come to believe them yourself. 

Each evening you clasped your hands together desperately in prayer, vehemently struggling with everything you had been raised to know and everything you wanted and needed to feel. It was an eternal battle that raged on inside, slowly withering you into a ghost, haunted by the darkness that had flourished in the absence of support and acceptance.

You wondered what the people who had claimed to love and know you the most, would do if they found out about your dirty, little secret. The anxieties about being outed manifested in cruel dreams, awakening you suddenly, a thin layer of sweat glistening on your body as your chest rose and fell in quick staccato breaths. 

That was something you still wondered today. And you would certainly wonder for the rest of your life. You had vowed that you would never come out to your family unless you truly fell in love with a girl. So you had kept everyone at arm's length to protect yourself. But Paige Bueckers was slowly breaking your walls down, brick by brick. 

A wave of nausea washes over you as you realize that getting closer to Paige meant toying the line of the false heteronormative persona you’ve been carefully crafting since you were a young teenager. The temptation of feeling normal in a group of girls quickly shuts down any immediate worries. That was a problem for another time. 

You hear your roommates in the living room, bustling around without having any idea of your internal battle. With a sigh, you drag yourself out of bed to go out to meet them, already preparing for the deafening noises that would inevitably come with telling them of last night's events. 

You open your door, nearly shuffling your feet against the carpet as you walk out to greet Taylor and Sarah. Their heads turn from the focus on the television, faces set in smiles as they see you emerge from your room.

“Guess what I did last night?” You prompt them, and their faces morph into ones of natural curiosity. 

“Did you read your class syllabuses to get a head start?” Sarah asks sarcastically, and you stick your tongue out at her in false derision. 

“No,” you scoff, although her guess was not completely off base. “I went over and hung out with Paige and the rest of the team.”

Taylor and Sarah were uncharacteristically quiet for a moment. They glanced at each other, momentarily stunned before erupting in hollers, jumping to their feet in excitement. 

“How the fuck did that happen?” Taylor all but yells, still jumping up and down. It was a good thing you did not have downstairs neighbors.

“Well they were being so loud, and I wanted to go to bed, so I knocked on the door to politely ask them to shut up,” you explain, trying to hide the giddiness you felt as you recalled the events of last night.

“And Paige answered and invited me in. And now I’m going out with her and the team tonight,” you finish, carefully watching the reactions of your two best friends. 

Their faces were morphed into ones of sheer delight and astonishment.

“My innocent, little angel is growing up,” Taylor exclaims, pretending to wipe a tear from her eye, and you swat at her, giggling at the sheer hilarity of the situation.

“What am I supposed to wear to a bar?” You ask, and the girls shriek in laughter, clapping their hands and promising to help you get dressed later.

You feel better about everything, the support from your roommates briefly quelling the fears and uncertainties that had plagued your mind for years. And your excitement was a testimony to the effect a certain blonde had on you.

~

“You’ve got great tits. Might as well show them off,” Sarah says exasperatedly, shoving one of her low cut tops at you.

Your face heats up, and you hold up the tiny tank top. “Don’t you think it’s a little, I don’t know, slutty?” Your voice trails to a whisper as you think about purposely showing off your body. 

“That’s the point, girl! It’s finally your time to show everyone what you’re fucking made of. Go be a sexy, bad bitch!” Taylor urges, slapping you on the butt as she does.

You take a deep breath, nodding in agreement, finally pushing yourself further away from the perfect, good girl act that had been placed upon you since you were a child. 

You don the skimpy black tank, admiring the way it shows off your slim waist, and you pair it with tight jeans that accentuate the curve of your ass perfectly. You fluff your hair and add a layer of lip gloss, before taking one last long glance in the mirror.

You could do this.

With a few encouraging words from your roommates and a few slaps to your ass, you nervously make your way across the hall to knock once more on Paige’s door. The door is thrown open, loud cheers erupting as you appear, and KK launches herself at you excitedly, throwing her arms around you and pulling you into her. 

Giggling, you hug her back, your nerves melting away at her friendly disposition. She pulls away, eyeing you up and down with an approving nod. “Someone cooked here,” she smirks, and your face blooms an embarrassing shade of deep red.

“My roommates kind of helped me get dressed,” you admit, hands tugging down your impossibly small shirt. 

“Girl, you look fineee,” she says, rubbing her hands together, causing several of the other girls to cackle at her not so subtle attempt to rizz you up.

“Who looks fine?” you hear a familiar voice, and your head whips in the direction of the question. You see Paige sauntering towards you, and your heart immediately begins to pound as your eyes rake over her tall figure. 

Her hair was down in blonde waves, making you want to reach out and run your hand through the soft-looking locks. Her toned stomach was exposed from her crop top, her abs flashing in a way that had your stomach rolling with an unfamiliar feeling. You couldn’t necessarily put your finger on it, but it shot down in an intense display of unbridled want. And she had the smuggest look on her face, accentuating the plumpness of her bottom lip. Your tongue subconsciously darts out to lick a slow line against your own lip as you watch her approach you.

KK points at you, waggling her eyebrows. “The pretty princess over here.” 

You blush again. Shit, you really had to get that under control. 

Paige hums, looking you up and down once more. “She’s not wrong,” she mutters huskily in your ear as she pulls you in for a hug. Your knees weaken at her touch, and you aren't sure if you’d be able to survive the night. It had just begun, and she had you completely and irrevocably fucked. 

30 minutes later, you, Paige, and the other members of UCONN’s women’s basketball team were shuffling into several ubers to head to a nearby bar. Unsure of which car to get into, you awkwardly stand off to the side, the anxiety pumping through your veins once more, but you soon feel a muscular arm wrap around your waist.

Looking up, you are met with Paige’s blue eyes and that smug smirk, and with a wink, she guides you to the nearest car, helping you into the backseat. As you sit, you adjust your top, overly aware of how much of your chest was actually out. Paige sits next to you, settling in with a low grunt, and she immediately places a hand on your thigh. Your eyes focus on the veins and the length of her fingers, and that feeling in your belly ignites again. 

As you arrive at the bar, Paige helps you out of the car with a chivalrous hand. And it does not leave yours as you enter the doors. She laces her fingers through yours, and you don’t miss the way it feels so damn right. She guides you through the crowds of people, and your breath hitches, feeling slightly overwhelmed from the volume and the hoards of drunk people pushing into your frame. 

Paige notices immediately, and she pulls you closer, tucking you into her side protectively. You preen at the attention, the feeling so foreign but addictive. You needed more, and the idea of it ripped away from you sent an unsettling spike of dread shooting through you maliciously. 

Subtly, you shake your head in a futile attempt to clear the thoughts out of your head. Overthinking was sure to be your downfall. Nothing a little alcohol couldn’t fix, though.

Aside from the occasional glass of wine, you had never really drank. And you certainly had never done shots. But when Nika and Aubrey had thrusted a tray of them towards where you and Paige were sitting, you were quick to grab one, eager to dull the bitter voices in your head. 

You bring it to your face, taking a hesitant sniff that causes your nose to wrinkle, eliciting a fond chuckle from the blonde. “Do I just sip it or…?” You trail off shyly, suddenly very aware of how ridiculous you sounded. What kind of college girl didn’t know how to take a shot?

Paige bites her lip. “Lemme help you, baby,” she mutters in your ear, and she takes the shot out of your hand. “Breathe all of the air out and then swallow it all at once before you take another breath, okay?” 

You nod, letting the air leave your mouth, lips pouting. Without her gaze leaving your mouth, Paige holds up the shot glass, pouring the liquid down your throat in a swift motion. 

You swallow quickly, feeling the burn slide down your throat and settle into a warm pool in your belly. You lick your lips, trying to catch a tiny drop that had slid past your mouth and trailed down your chin towards your neck. 

Before you can chase the trickle, Paige leans in, swiping it with her thumb, placing it into her mouth and sucking, her cheeks hollowing in the process. 

Your face morphs into a look of shock, and she gives you a shit-eating grin. The effect she had on you was something out of a book you spent many lonely nights immersing yourself in. And now that you were living in the crystal clear reality, you regretted not getting out of your shell a little sooner. 

“Can I do another?” You ask, already looking at the tray where a few shots still remained. 

Paige laughs. “Maybe wait a few, princess. The alcohol will kick in soon,” she promises. “You can share mine,” she gestures to her drink, and you don’t miss the way the pet name rolls off her tongue effortlessly. 

Paige was not lying when she had told you that the effects would soon hit you. Before you could even start to feel uncomfortable, a delicious easiness fell over you, loosening you up in a way you had never experienced before. You reach for Paige’s straw once more, pretending that her mouth was not just on it, and you relish in the sweet liquid adding to your tipsiness.

Paige had stayed close all night, similarly to the night before, and you were grateful for her constant presence anchoring you. The other girls took turns dancing with you, showering you with compliments and making future plans. Even through the haze of the alcohol, your heart felt as if it could burst; they were all so nice, and for the first time in a long time, you felt like you actually belonged. 

The night flies by, and as it does, you and Paige get more and more touchy. Her hands took turns between trailing down your back and resting heavily on your hips. She played with a lock of your hair, twisting it in her fingers as you swayed to the music, and she was constantly gazing at you through heavy lids, pupils blown from the darkness of the bar and pure want.

Emboldened by the drinks that had graced your lips, you don’t shy away, and before you know it, you’re leaning in closer, intoxicated by more than just the liquor. The bustling crowds and excessive noise surrounding you melts away as Paige grips your waist, pulling you closer into her. 

Your heart pounds at her proximity. She reaches up, cradling your jaw and stroking the soft skin of your neck with her thumb. You wonder if she can feel the thumping of your carotid, but you’re too enthralled in her presence to even care. Her eyes flit between your own and your slightly parted lips. Everything felt so fucking delicate, as if one small move would break everything. 

“Been thinkin’ about doin’ this all night,” she whispers, and pulls you into a kiss.

All the air is sucked out of you as her lips touch yours. And while you are momentarily stunned, it does not take long before yours are moving against her in a delicious exchange of passion. All worries of not being a good kisser leave your mind as Paige moans against your mouth, the sound shooting straight down your belly and to your pussy. Her tongue moves against you, and the feel of it does not help the slick now accumulating in your panties. 

The kiss eventually ends, much to your displeasure, and as you pull away, a giggle erupts from your mouth at the insanity of it all.

You had just kissed Paige Bueckers.

“OOH, P is fucking whipped!” KK shouts over the music, enthusiastically high-fiving Ice and Nika. 

Fuck, you were caught. 

But little did KK know, is that you were pretty fucking whipped, too. With one smooth move, Paige had broken down all your walls, and you were surrounded by the bricks of your carefully crafted innocence shattered around you at your feet. And maybe you could blame it on the alcohol, but you were pretty sure that if Paige made you anything less of a good girl, you were certainly okay with that. 

~

Part 3 - You get drunk off Paige, and confessions come out.

Part 4 - Paige makes you feel so good.

Part 5 - Paige shows you her strap.

The beginning hits a little too close to home I’m so sorry I blacked out while writing it. It’s been almost 9 years since I realized I had feelings for girls, and I still struggle every day with accepting myself. To all the readers who are going through the same thing, I love you, and here’s to hoping things get better. If you ever want to reach out, my inbox is always open.

xoxo katy

[swxxtsxcchxrine]

Love that everyone agrees that Miguel is a munch and pussy whipped!! But I don’t think enough people talk about him liking when you squirt! He loves when he’s soo deep, feeling you clench around him and you push at hit stomach as you lift your hips and gush all over him. Loves when you’re so overwhelmed and cumming that he bullies his cock back in. Looooves the tears streaming down your face and the chants of his name as he asks you to do it one more time!!!

Also not enough people know that men can squirt too if the tip is stimulated enough and I think Miguel being overstimmed and squirting would be so🤤.

GIRL WOW i immediately got butterflies when i read this your mind is just 🤯 but you are 110% right. no way men can squirt 😭😭 thats so crazy, ill defo use that in my next whatever these things are muahhh!

Miguel uses you squirting as a personal challenge to himself yk. at one point he makes it his goal to make you gush at least once every time ym have sex. you could say its his way on claiming you, because he knows he's the only one that can make you cum so hard. he's got you folded in half, his thick cock splitting your tight cunt, the line between pleasure and pain becoming blurred. your mind is mush and so are your insides. Miguel watches you as you mewl out his name. "you feel that, mama? that's me, that's all me..." he teases as he pushes on the bulge from your belly. a frothy ring of your cream rims his cock, as your gummy cunt oozes it's juices all over the sheets and drips all over his pelvis. fat tears slide down your hot cheeks while the fat tip of his dick hit the opening to your cervix. his large build easily overpowers you so he grabs the backs of your knees and brings them to your shoulders. you whined out loud pawing at his arms in an attempt to slow him down. "mphm, i'm gonna fuck a baby into you, pretty girl. fuck, you're gonna be such a good mama," he grunts. he can feel your hole clenching on him tight, basically milking his cock. he hisses before groaning as his roll back. "all round and swollen with our babies, fuck, i can't wait," his hips stutter for a moment before he finds his rhythm once more. his pelvis pounds into you harder than before, his dick going in deeper than before. "Miguel... t's too big...can't..." your hands run down his pecs, rubbing on his hard nipples. "awe, my poor baby doesn't know her potential," he coos. "yes you can, you can take it all f'me, yeah?" he smiles condescendingly. he is such a meanie. his sly hand reaches down to run tight circles on your clit. "Miguel!" you sob, your vision being blurred by stinging tears. your hands push and grab at his arms, his abdomen, anything you can grab as you gasp and squeal from the overwhelming pleasure. you try to run away from his dick and his fingers while chanting his name as a desperate plea, but he's faster and stronger than you. he holds your hips in place as the buck and tremble vigorously. your stomach flips and you suddenly feel like your about to pee as his cock hits your g spot every time. your slick pussy tightens around his dick as you gush around his fat dick. his cock pummels out from the force as his fingers play around with your clit, spraying your squirt everywhere. "there's a good girl," he says lifting your legs up and spreading your lips apart to watch your cunt clench around nothing. your pussy was sore and battered and you were completely worn, but he wasn't done with you. you squeal before trying to close your shaking legs from sensitivity but he holds them open by force. he rubs the tip of his angry cock through your folds, catching it on your clit as you shudder and move your hips away with a sob. "s'ok, mami. i know, i know. i'm gonna make you feel so good, yeah?" he whispers while slowing slipping his hard and pretty cock back into your gummy insides.

i need a man like miguel so bad, i like my men big, beefy and a lil mean. hes so so so so so so so hot. I wanna give this man the most tear jerking, fantastic, name yelling, toe curling, eye rolling, ass clenching, soul sucking, jaw locking, heart wrenching, leg cramping, award winning, sheet gripping, mouth drooling, sloppiest head ever, then i want him to dump his warm cum into my mouth, then he’s gonna flip me onto my hands and knees and eat me inside and out making my legs shake and shiver, and tremble before making me gush all over his pretty face before stuffing me with his long and thick cock, pounding me into the mattress, into oblivion, dumbing me down into nothing but a pretty pile of glitter, thrusting into me, hitting that same good spot and the spilling his hot seed into me making me gush all over his chest, his pelvis and abdomen. i'll be his little fountain. just for him. i want his children.🥺🥺

[visenyaism]

HOTD blog post GRRM posted and almost immediately deleted under the cut for archival purposes

Beware the Butterflies

SEPTEMBER 4, 2024

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Back in July, I promised you some further thoughts about Blood and Cheese… and Maelor the Missing… after my commentary on the first two episodes of HotD season 2, “A Son for a Son” and “Rhaenyra the Cruel.”

Those were terrific episodes: well written, well directed, powerfully acted. A great way to kick off the new season. Fans and critics alike seemed to agree. There was only one aspect of the episodes that drew significant criticism: the handling of Blood and Cheese, and the death of Prince Jaehaerys. From the commentary I saw on line, opinion was split there. The readers of FIRE & BLOOD found the sequence underwhelming, a disappointment, watered down from what they were expecting. Viewers who had not read the book had no such problems. Most of them found the sequence a real gut-punch, tragic, horrifying, nightmarish, etc. Some reported being reduced to tears.

I found myself agreeing with both sides.

In my book, Aegon and Helaena have three children, not two. The twins, Jaehaerys and Jaehaera, are six years old. They have a younger brother, Maelor, who is two. When Blood and Cheese break in on Helaena and the kids, they tell her they are debt collectors come to exact revenge for the death of Prince Lucerys: a son for a son. As Helaena has two sons, however, they demand that she choose which one should die. She resists and offers her own life instead, but the killers insist it has to be a son. If she does not name one, they will kill all three of the children. To save the life of the twins, Helaena names Maelor. But Blood kills the older boy, Jaehaerys, instead, while Cheese tells little Maelor that his mother wanted him dead. (Whether the boy is old enough to understand that is not at all certain).

That’s not how it happens on the show. There is no Maelor in HOUSE OF THE DRAGON, only the twins (both of whom look younger than six, but I am no sure judge of children’s ages, so I can’t be sure how old they are supposed to be). Blood can’t seem to tell the twins apart, so Helaena is asked to reveal which one is the boy. (You would think a glance up his PJs would reveal that, without involving the mother). Instead of offering her own life to save the kids, Helaena offers them a necklace. Blood and Cheese are not tempted. Blood saws Prince Jaehaerys’s head off. We are spared the sight of that; a sound effect suffices. (In the book, he lops the head off with a sword).

It is a bloody, brutal scene, no doubt. How not? An innocent child is being butchered in front of his mother.

I still believe the scene in the book is stronger. The readers have the right of that. The two killers are crueler in the book. I thought the actors who played the killers on the show were excellent… but the characters are crueler, harder, and more frightening in FIRE & BLOOD. In the show, Blood is a gold cloak. In the book, he is a former gold cloak, stripped of his office for beating a woman to death. Book Blood is the sort of man who might think making a woman choose which of her sons should die is amusing, especially when they double down on the wanton cruelty by murdering the boy she tries to save. Book Cheese is worse too; he does not kick a dog, true, but he does not have a dog, and he’s the one who tells Maelor that his mom wants him head. I would also suggest that Helaena shows more courage, more strength in the book, by offering her own own life to save her son. Offering a piece of jewelry is just not the same.

As I saw it, the “Sophie’s Choice” aspect was the strongest part of the sequence, the darkest, the most visceral. I hated to lose that. And judging from the comments on line, most of the fans seemed to agree.

When Ryan Condal first told me what he meant to do, ages ago (back in 2022, might be) I argued against it, for all these reasons. I did not argue long, or with much heat, however. The change weakened the sequence, I felt, but only a bit. And Ryan had what seemed to be practical reasons for it; they did not want to deal with casting another child, especially a two-year old toddler. Kids that young will inevitably slow down production, and there would be budget implications. Budget was already an issue on HOUSE OF THE DRAGON, it made sense to save money wherever we could. Moreover, Ryan assured me that we were not losing Prince Maelor, simply postponing him. Queen Helaena could still give birth to him in season three, presumably after getting with child late in season two. That made sense to me, so I withdrew my objections and acquiesced to the change.

I still love the episode, and the Blood and Cheese sequence overall. Losing the “Helaena’s Choice” beat did weaken the scene, but not to any great degree. Only the book readers would even notice its absence; viewers who had never read FIRE & BLOOD would still find the scenes heart-rending. Maelor did not actually DO anything in the scene, after all. How could he? He was only two years old.

There is another aspect to the removal of the young princeling, however.

Those of you who hate spoilers should STOP READING HERE. Spoilers will follow, at least for the readers among you. If you have never read FIRE & BLOOD, maybe it does not matter, because all I am going to “spoil” here are things that happen in the book that may NEVER happen on the series. Starting with Maelor himself.

Sometime between the initial decision to remove Maelor, a big change was made. The prince’s birth was no longer just going to be pushed back to season 3. He was never going to be born at all. The younger son of Aegon and Helaena would never appear.

Most of you know about the Butterfly Effect, I assume.

Yes, there was a movie with that title a few years back. It’s a familiar concept in chaos theory as well. But most science fiction fans were first exposed to the idea in Ray Bradbury’s classic time travel story, “A Sound of Thunder,” wherein a time traveler from the present panics and crushes a butterfly while hunting a T-Rex. When he returns to his own time, he discovers that the world has changed in huge and frightening ways. One dead butterfly has rewritten history. The lesson being that change begets change, and even small and seemingly insignificant alterations to a timeline — or a story — can have a profound effect on all that follows.

Maelor is a two year old toddler in FIRE & BLOOD, but like our butterfly he has an impact on the story all out of proportion to his size. The readers among you may recall that when it appears that Rhaenyra and her blacks are about to capture King’s Landing, Queen Alicent becomes concerned for the safety of Helaena’s remaining children, and takes steps to save them by smuggling them out of the city. The task is given is two knights of the Kingsguard. Ser Willis Fell is commanded to deliver Princess Jaehaera to the Baratheons at Storm’s End, while Maelor is given over to Ser Rickard Thorne to be escorted across the Mander to the protection of the Hightower army on its way to King’s Landing.

Willis Fell delivers Jaehaera safely to the Baratheons at Storm’s End, but Ser Rickard fares less well. He and Maelor get as far as Bitterbridge, where he is revealed as a Kingsuard in a tavern called the Hogs Head. Once discovered, Ser Rickard fights bravely to protect his young charge and bring him to safety, but he does not even make it across the bridge before some crossbows bring him down, Prince Maelor is torn from his arms.. and then, sadly, ripped to pieces by the mob fighting over the boy and the huge reward that Rhaenyra has offered for his capture and return.

Will any of that appear on the show? Maybe… but I don’t see how. The butterflies would seem to prohibit it. You could perhaps make Ser Rickard’s ward be Jaehaera instead of Maelor, but Jaehaera can’t be killed, she has a huge role to play as Aegon’s next heir. Could maybe make Maelor a newborn instead of a two year old, but that would scramble up the timeline, which is a bit of a mess already. I have no idea what Ryan has planned — if indeed he has planned anything — but given Maelor’s absence from episode 2, the simplest way to proceed would be just to drop him entirely, lose the bit where Alicent tries to send the kids to safety, drop Rickard Thorne or send him with Willis Fell so Jaehaera has two guards.

From what I know, that seems to be what Ryan is doing here. It’s simplest, yes, and may make sense in terms of budgets and shooting schedules. But simpler is not better. The Bitterbridge scene has tension, suspense, action, bloodshed, a bit of heroism and a lot of tragedy. Rickard Thorne is a tertiary character at best, most viewers (as opposed to readers) will never know he is gone, since they never knew him at all… but I rather liked giving him his brief moment of heroism, a taste of the courage and loyalty of the Kingsguard, regardless of whether they are black or green.

The butterflies are not done with us yet, however. In the book, when word of Prince Maelor’s death and the grisly manner of his passing (pp. 505) reaches the Red Keep, that proves to be the thing that drives Queen Helaena to suicide. She could barely stand to look at Maelor, knowing that she chose him to die in the “Sophie’s Choice” scene… and now he is dead in truth, her words having come true. The grief and guilt are too much for her to bear.

In Ryan’s outline for season 3, Helaena still kills herself… for no particular reason. There is no fresh horror, no triggering event to overwhelm the fragile young queen.

And the final butterfly follows soon thereafter.

Queen Helaena, a sweet and gentle soul, is much beloved by the smallfolk of King’s Landing. Rhaenyra was not, so when rumors began to arise that Helaena did not kill herself, but rather was murdered at Rhaenyra’s command, the commons are quick to believe them. “That night King’s Landing rose in bloody riot,” I wrote on p. 506 of FIRE & BLOOD. It is the beginning of the end for Rhaenyra’s rule over the city, ultimately leading to the Storming of the Dragonpit and the rise of the Shepherd’s mob that drives Rhaenyra to flee the city and return to Dragonstone… and her death.

Maelor by himself means little. He is a small child, does not have a line of dialogue, does nothing of consequence but die… but where and when and how, that does matter. Losing Maelor weakened the end of the Blood and Cheese sequence, but it also cost us the Bitterbridge scene with all its horror and heroism, it undercut the motivation for Helaena’s suicide, and that in turn sent thousands into the streets and alleys, screaming for justice for their “murdered” queen. None of that is essential, I suppose… but all of it does serve a purpose, it all helps to tie the story lines together, so one thing follows another in a logical and convincing manner.

What will we offer the fans instead, once we’ve killed these butterflies? I have no idea. I do not recall that Ryan and I ever discussed this, back when he first told me they were pushing back on Aegon’s second son. Maelor himself is not essential… but if losing him means we also lose Bitterbridge, Helaena’s suicide, and the riots, well… that’s a considerable loss.

And there are larger and more toxic butterflies to come, if HOUSE OF THE DRAGON goes ahead with some of the changes being contemplated for seasons 3 and 4…

GRRM

[ssailormoonn]

❛ LEMME TAKE CARE OF YOU !! ❜

Rengoku Kyojuro X Fem!Reader

WC; 1.6k+ | !MDNI! | TW/CW :: reader isnt a demon slayer, wife!reader, oral -> male receiving, blowjob, sub Rengoku, dom!reader x sub!rengoku, soft teasing? soft praise?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚𝑅𝐸𝒬𝒰𝐸𝒮𝒯 :: (filled request) Rengoku coming back from a mission (mugen train lets just say he survived cuz i like being delulu) and he's really tired so reader gives him the reward he deserves? 👀 something along those lines? I imagined it to be sub rengoku but if you dont Like that its absolutely fine!! - ANON

m.list | demon slayer m.list

You were in the kitchen preparing dinner for the family. It had been weeks since Kyojuro's mission began, and with every day, a little more of your heart swelled. You kept up a good face with Senjuro and Shinjuro, but sometimes it was just too much to bear.

Senjuro walked into the kitchen, giving you a small smile. "Need any help, {Y/n}?"

"Sure, could you set the table?" you replied gratefully, appreciating that his company was a good form of distraction.

You worked together in easy silence for a while until Senjuro suddenly spoke up. "I'm sure he's okay, you know. Brother is strong. He'll come back to us."

You smiled at the little boy; he was so pathetic in his attempts to reassure you. "I know, Senjuro. It's just hard not to worry."

Before Senjuro could reply, a flurry of cawing pierced through the air. Both of you turned to see the crow approaching with wingbeats in desperation, then settling onto the windowsill with a worried look exactly the same as yours.

"""Kyojuro Rengoku is gravely injured and in the Butterfly Mansion. Immediate assistance needed."

Your heart dropped, and your hands shook. "Kyojuro…"

Senjuro seized your hand with his; his eyes wide with alarm just as yours were. "We have to see him."

  You nodded at him, managing to steady your racing heart. "Yes, we must." At this moment, Shinjuro appeared before you; his normally cool face replaced with a concerned expression. "I'll set up an escort for both of you immediately to the Butterfly Mansion."

Within minutes, one Kakushi came to take you to Kyojuro. As you were leaving, Senjuro squeezed your hand for the last time, and his lashes pooled with tears. "Bring him back to us, {Y/n}."

"I will," you lied, forcing down the bubble of fear welling inside of you. You are already afraid for your husband, and now that fear has reached rocket size.

The path to the Butterfly Mansion seemed endless as your mind was consumed with thoughts of Kyojuro. Images of his bright smile were all that would flash across your mind, throbbing at the chest in a pained way because you did not know how badly he had been hurt—only that it was serious.

You finally arrived at the Butterfly Mansion. With the help of Kakushi, you pushed your way through and finally reached a place with a heart that was racing in your chest. A kind nurse guided you to the room Kyojuro was being treated in.

You had paused at the door, taking a deep breath before stepping in. There he lay, bandaged and pale on the bed, alive. His eyes flickered open at your approach, and a weak but real smile spread across his face.

"{Y/n}…" he whispered, barely audible.

You went down on your knees beside him and took his hand in yours. "Kyojuro, I was so worried," you said with sobs.

He squeezed your hand weakly at once; his smile still did not leave. "Sorry. I worried you. But.I'm glad you're here."

You brushed a tear from your cheek and bent low to place a light, gentle kiss on his forehead. "I'm here now, and I'll take care of you.".

The yellow and red in Kyojuro's eyes gleamed with love as he smiled upon being close to you physically. He was also very concerned about the struggle against Upper Rank 3, fearing that he might not be able to see you again—his beautiful wife and lovely wife. "Thank you, my love."

It was only a mere two weeks that you stayed at the Butterfly Mansion, but every day felt longer as you watched over Rengoku. Although he didn't verbally express it, you knew he wanted you there. Shinobu, with her perceptive nature, frequently advised you to go home for the sake of your mental health, but Rengoku's silent plea kept you by his side.

As the days passed, Rengoku's health gradually improved, and the time finally came for him to return home. The morning of his departure, you helped him pack his belongings, feeling relieved that your husband was safe and alive. Rengoku was visibly tired but tried to mask it with his usual enthusiasm, but nothing slips past you. 

Once everything was ready, he turned to you, his gaze softening. "Thank you for staying with me," he said, his voice laced with exhaustion. He took a step closer, closing the distance between you.

Before you could respond, he cupped your face in his large, warm hands and pressed his lips to yours. The kiss was tender yet passionate. However, you felt the weight of his fatigue in the way he leaned into you.

As the kiss deepened, Rengoku's hands moved to your waist, pulling you closer. The warmth of his body enveloped you, and you could feel his heartbeat through the thin fabric of your clothing. His kisses trailed from your lips to your jaw, then to your neck.

"You mean the world to me," he murmured against your skin, his voice husky and filled with need. His hands wandered, exploring the familiar curves of your body, and you couldn't help but respond to his touch. The room seemed to grow warmer, the air thick with anticipation.

Rengoku's exhaustion was evident, but so was his desire. "I need you," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear. 

Good thing that Rengoku was assigned a private room.

"Let me please you," you breathed against his lips. "You are so tired, let me cater to you."

"My flame-"

"Kyo, please," you asked, but either way, you were going to be the one pleasuring him. 

Rengoku lets out a sigh and nods, stroking the back of my head before continuing, "Alright, please don't feel pressured."

A smile rose onto your lips at his kindness knowing that Rengoku always makes sure that you're comfortable even if you're always the one topping him. Your knees ached softly against the oak-slatted floor while Rengoku sat on the edge of the bed. It wouldn't usually be like this, everytime that the two of you have engaged in any intimate acts it had always been in the Rengoku estate and on the futon, so doing this on an actual bed was different.

Although, the position to take his cock into your mouth and suck him dry was absolutely perfect. 

Rengoku hesitantly entangled his fingers into your hair, gently gripping the strands making sure not to hurt you. Your eyes widen at the growing bulge in his underwear and you palm his hardened erection causing a soft whimper to leave his mouth. A smile rises to your lips at the sight of his head tilted back, watching him as he swallows the lump in his throat.

"You're so big, Kyo," you tease, placing a kiss on his clothed twitching cock and the grip in your hair tightens when a shaky moan leaves Rengokus mouth.

Rengoku had a flush growing on his cheeks and it made your heart swell at the pretty sight of your husband. You pushed yourself up on your knees and forced your tongue quickly through his lips, engaging in a heated kiss before pulling away, a string of saliva connecting before it broke. 

You let yourself down and pulled the underwear down to reveal Rengoku's long and thick cock, your mouth almost watering at wanting to pleasure this man, you loved to hear his moans and whimpers. His cock hit his stomach and you gently gripped his base, angling the throbbing length towards you, admiring the pre-cum leaking out of the tip.

Placing a wet kiss on the red tip of his cock, a moan trembled out Rengoku's mouth as his chest was shaking from the short and ragged breaths he was intaking. "You're so pretty, Kyo," you coo before dragging the flat of your tongue up the underside of his shaft, feeling the veins that sprung up to the head of his cock, a stream of whimpers leaving his mouth at the contact.

Rengoku's head threw back, his grip tightening on my hair as a gasp came from his lips. His mouth hissed as your fingers toyed with the slit in his shaft, spreading the pre-cum that spilt from his swelled tip before finally taking his throbbing length into your mouth. Your tongue swirled around his swollen pink tip before you took his cock further into your mouth.

"Please," Rengoku whimpered and you hummed in response, spreading vibrations through his cock. He moaned helplessly in response, causing you to want more of him. 

You let your mouth slip off of his cock, placing another whimper to emit from his lips. "'M just giving you the reward you deserve, Kyo. Always providing for me," you coo before taking his dick back into your soft and wet mouth. 

You were trying to take him as deep as you could without gagging on his cock, using your hand to jerk off the reminder that didn't fit into your mouth. Rengoku's whimpers and moans grew louder before he struggled to maintain a still stature. Rengoku began to move your head through the tuffs of your hair, your movements not your own as you removed your hand and let him take control.

He moans, "Feel so good."

When you take him carelessly and put him into your mouth, tears well up in the doe's eyes. Your cunt was soaking wetter by the moment, and the whimpers coming out of his mouth made it even more likely that he would soak your pants.

Rengoku started moving more quickly, which made you start crying even more. When you hollowed out your cheeks, he let out a stifled sigh that made him hesitate to approach further. He pulls away from you, his load spilling into your mouth.

Rengoku's eyes were wide when he looked down to see the tears slipping from your eyes. "My Flame, are you alright?" he asks worried and you nod.

You swallow the sticky come and you reply. "I am, Kyo. Just was overwhelming. 'M happy I made you feel so good," you hum standing up and wrapping your arms around him. "I love you so much."

He wraps his arms securely around your waist, burying his head into your chest, still with heated cheeks. "I love you more."

Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.

m.list | demon slayer m.list

i hope this was okay 🧍🏼‍♀️

[ang3lofdivinity]

❝𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐮𝐧❞

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊☽ ◯ ☾₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

Relationship(s): Yan!Andy (Andrew) Graves x Fem!reader

Format: Headcanons + stories.

Genre: IMPLIED Smut + fluff + some angst(?)

Warnings: Consent mf, intimidation, SA from one of the wardens to the reader, masturbation (reader and Andy), Leyley isn't super overprotective, Reader is very naïve and too kind (they consider all friends), kidnapping, stalking, Andy is kinda turned on by the readers constant praise and nicknames for him, smoking, swearing, smut has been removed because.. the more I realize it I want this account to be decently fluff.

Andy is a very reserved person.

He's an introvert as per what his sister calls him.

And she's right.

He doesn't like being around others, he's pretty logical, he's also very calm.

But, what he doesn't know is how charming he is to others.

Hell, bunches of girls try and get with him, while Leyley obnoxiously tries to get rid of them all.

So, he's never really had a long term relationship with anyone aside his sister.

And over the years, he's managed to craft, a meticulously created one, a façade.

A mask he's worked on for years.

One that he knows will never crack.

But perhaps he got too confident.

Because when you came along, he was restraining himself practically from getting excited after the first time he saw you.

He saw you, being the new kid in class back when he was still in school at a young age before being trapped in that hellscape he called his home.

You were an extrovert it seemed, turning out to be the opposite. But, you still cared a lot about everything and everyone, you introduced yourself sweetly with something along the lines of..

"Good morning, I'm (____) (_____). If you need anything, I'll always be right here."

You were so calm, so pretty.. how could someone be so pretty?

You joined a bunch of after school activities, student council and such.

Although, you seemed a bit worried over something always every time he saw you.

He felt something within his stomach churn whenever he saw you though, not managing to gather enough courage to talk to you.

So, you had to initiate the contact.

You saw him, being all lonely..

That made you feel incredibly horrible, you were in that position yourself once too.

So, you approached him.

And his heart fluttered.

"Good evening.. you're Andrew Graves, right?" You inquired as you sat beside him at his lunch table as your friends immediately started whispering to each other.

"Oh- I- I'm Andrew Graves, yes.." he cringed at his own stuttering, but you didn't seem to mind.

"Why don't you come and sit at my table with my friends?" You invited him with a warm smile.

He felt butterflies in his stomach, a feeling he never had in a while..

"Are- you sure? They won't make fun of me?.." he asked, obviously worried.

"Of course not! If they do, we can have lunch together alone if you want!"

"..alright."

That was the day he became so clingy to you.

Usually, he's very cynical. But, for some reason with you.. he could feel that your actions were very genuine.

And that's what got him attached.

Along with your humor.

"I swear to fucking goddess if Miss Alta keeps telling me to not draw, I will—"

"Good morning, Miss Alta!" You exclaimed happily the moment your communications teacher stepped foot into the room.

He almost wheezed, letting out a giggle at his failed attempt to restrain himself. His expression turned into one filled with guilt and embarrassment, but before Miss Alta or any of the students spoke, you blurted out.

"Ah, Miss Alta, there's something wrong with the air conditioning. It keeps moving a bit and making that scraping noise." You semi-lied as you turned to Andrew and gave a more sincere smile before paying attention once more.

..you would just, lie for him like that..

Your smile could make him go crazy, it couldn't be compared to anything!! The way you cried, your tears streaming down your cheeks as you ran to him when you got hurt on the playground earlier- blue diamonds couldn't even compare to the richness of them, and the way you were very touchy..

You always held onto his hand, holding onto his shirt as you walked behind him anxiously, anytime when you got older and watched any horror movie and clang onto him.

That's when it all went to shit.

You had to leave the state.

THE STATE.

After you had just got settled after the last time where you moved here as a child!

He almost broke down, wanting to pour out all of his feelings as if it would change anything.

But it was official, and Leyley had him all to herself. It was like that for years.

He was all alone.

He felt empty.

He felt empty without you.

Like a part of his soul was torn from him.

And that stuck with him forever.

Some sort of dark, black tar over his heart made it feel disgusting and filthy.

But for the lonely part..

It wasn't like that for long.

When they grew older, he started dating someone after so long.

His (ex) girlfriend, Julia.

But eventually, that all ended when he got put into that quarantined building with Leyley.

She broke it off with him on one of those nights.

He sobbed about it, and Leyley didn't help.

But, that's when he got a strange phone call when Leyley was asleep and he was still up.

He was hesitant, but his gut told him to pick it up.

And that he did.

And that was one of the best decisions of his life.

"..Hello?" He spoke, his voice raspy. He was unsure of what telemarketer would be calling at this hour, and it couldn't possibly be someone he knew.

"Andrew?.. is this really you?!.."

That voice.. that voice instead changed his mind of this being some sort of telemarketer.. how? Because that’s your voice. After so many years, you had called him!

"..(____)?!" He yelped out, almost loud enough to wake LeyLey.

"Oh dear— I'm so glad I can hear your sweet voice again!!" You exclaimed, sounding like you were on the brink of tears.

All of those previous feelings he had for you back when you were still around, they all came back in a flurry, overwhelming him.

"(____), I'm.. how did you get this number?.." he wanted to ask you so much more, but that's all that came out at the moment.

"I heard about the quarantine you got into with your sister.. I'm so sorry. One of the wardens was kind enough to give me your number! I didn't have much time previously due to my work.. but, now I have and I'm so thankful!"

"..Good god it's so nice hearing your voice again, (____)" he mumbled, smiling as tears prickled at his eyes. There were so many words that wanted to spill out of his mouth, but nothing came out due to his own self restraint.

"I'm going to get you out of there! I promise! You and your sister!" You yelped out, happiness laced into your voice. You were zeal about this, you were going to get him and his sister out of here. Or at least try.

"Wait- aren't you worried about the wardens??? They've been keeping us here!" He responded back, biting on his thumb.

"Eh?? Nah! I'm sure! The warden seemed to like me, I'm sure I can persuade him somehow." For some reason, this didn't sit right with him..

"..." He went radio silent, this feeling akin to foreboding surging through him with the sense of anger as well. But, he swallowed down his frustration and took some deep breaths.

"Andy- Andrew?.. you there?" You tried to fix your mistake. You heard his sister call him by that nickname once- so you know it's at least somewhat gotta be sentimental for him.

"..you can call me Andy" he slowly spoke up.

"Are you sure?.."

"I'm.. sure. Call me Andy." It almost sounded like a demand..

"..Alright, Andy."

He doesn't even let his own sister call him that anymore, but he lets you do it with free reign.. strange.

"Now, would you like to talk for a bit?.. or should I get straight to work with the pla-"

"Talk!.. please. I just.. I missed you. I missed listening to your voice, I missed just being with you.." he blurted out, cutting you off. He put a hand over his mouth in response, his eyes wide and filled with shame.

"..."

"..."

"...."

"I'm sorry- that probably sounded weird.." he spoke up after a long moment of silence.

"Nono! Don't apologize, I missed hearing your voice too, hun." You spoke sweetly to him, a smile he couldn't see plastered on your face.

"..Hun?" Saying the word made him feel this warm, bubbling sensation within his chest. It made him want to indulge in it more..

"I'm not gonna use Andy all the time, darling!" You giggled happily, and that just made something within his stomach churn and twist.. something that has been dormant for years finally stir.

It made his knees go weak, his mouth go slightly agape as he failed to make any words come out of his mouth for a while until you spoke.

"..Andy? Honey?"

"Oh- sorry just.. deep in thought.”

"Ah, I get that.. well anyways, what would you like to talk about?"

You two talked until the sun finally rose and you got sleepy.

"Night Andy, Hun!" He could hear you yawn.

"Night, (____).."

He then placed the phone back down, hanging up shortly after you did as he found himself already yearning and missing your voice.

But, he knows.. better.

He just can’t help it though.

..No matter, he’ll hopefully be able to see you soon as you said.

That would be wrong though.

Because guess what? That warden that was so kind to you was only there for your looks. He wanted you to have some.. “personal time” with you if you get my gist.

“No fucking way you creep!!” You yelped out, this man was about twice your age and asking you to have some personal time with you.

“C’mon, sweetheart!.. I promise I’ll make it worth your while” The warden spoke, a sickening smile on his face.

“No means no, pervert!! Now, let me see my friends, let me get them out of here!” The warden groaned at your response.

“Alright, look here sweet-cheeks. You aren’t gonna be able to save your friends and I shouldn’t even be helping you. So, you either let me have you and you can take your friends, or I kill you right here and now” the man gave you an ultimatum, causing your eyes to widen.

“I..” You almost bursted out into tears when the man moved his hands to your shoulders, lowering your shirt.

“Lemme take care of ya.” he hummed, pushing you against the table within the break room, tears pooling down your cheeks.

You then tried focusing on something else, noticing the fact he had a ring of keys on his belt..

The warden had a hand glide up your thigh, massaging the bundle of nerves there. You tensed, straining back any noises that would come out of your mouth.

“No need to hold back, sweetheart..” he pressed himself closer to you, this was your time to strike!

You punched the man in the face, causing him to stumble back. You fixed your clothes, jumping off the table, you stared at the man who was waddling around like an idiot. A huff escaped past your lips as grabbed the nearest blunt object and flung it at the man. It was a simple lamp, but it hit him real good in the head. Honestly, you felt powerful in that moment, finding the courage to continuously punching the man, letting out every last string of anger that you felt. It was basically free therapy! And, when you were done, he was no longer moving. You grabbed the keys before you marched off, now off to find Andy and his sister, Ashley!

It took you a bit, but after knocking on a few doors, you heard nothing but some shuffling.

“Andy!! Its me! (____)!!” You yelped out, taking out the ring of keys as you fumbled with them in your hands.

“..(____)!? You actually came!?!” He spoke up after hearing your voice, immediately rushed over to the door as he heard you unlock it, opening it for you, taking you by surprise.

“Of course, hun! I never break a promise.” You spoke more dulcetly, a smile upon your face as you looked up at him.

He’s.. grown taller than you.

He spent no time dawdling as he hugged you, pressing you close to him as he twirled you around.

“I’m proud of you for waiting this long. So proud.” You praised, causing Andrew to become flustered as he desperately tried hiding it.

You paused for a moment before you started giggling a bit.

“What.. whats so funny??” He asked

“Nothing. Just reminiscing of the old times.”

“..you’re talking like a grandma.”

You bursted out laughing, patting his back.

“Oh— really now? ‘Just be a good boy and be quiet!’ Is that better??” You were giggling, since you knew your words made any sense for some Grandma to say, but he wasn’t taking this as a joke. The way you called him a good boy..

It.. turned something on for him, craving for more practically.

“Okay I think thats enough mushy reunion stuff, mm?” You smiled sweetly at the boy as he pulled away from the hug, his face still slightly flushed.

“Yeah..” he internally cursed himself for almost stuttering.

“Where’s Ashley?..” you quietly asked.

From that moment, everything happened like some sort of descending spiral of madness. The thing with the demon and Ashley… killing the second warden, all of that fancy stuff. (being horribly mortified in the end.)

You had the both of them stay in the motel for a while until you could bring them into your home as you got them necessities; paying for them to continue staying, getting them new clothes, food, entertainment and others (not even knowing about their little hobby together.)

You’d visit once a week, much to Andrews begging for you to come more often, constant thanks as well from him.

“..I don’t think we can repay you ever for this.”

You always said it was fine, and his sister did too. She seemed more laid backed about the entire situation.

And, when you rushed in the middle of the night to their motel in your car to tell them the news that you finished up your work for their rooms and such, only throwing on a long overcoat, keeping on your nightclothes and throwing one some slippers.

..but they weren’t in there.

“PSSSTTT” the sound almost made you scream, but you turned to the cause of the noise.

“Ashley!” You smiled, not speaking above a whisper.

“Get over here!!!” You immediately rushed over to her without another question, taking her into an embrace.

“Woah- calm down, goody-two-shoes!” She grumbled, trying to get you to let go or at least loosen your arms that were tightly wrapped around her.

“You and Andrew can finally come over!!” You practically cried out, a bright smile on your face.

“..Where is Andrew..?” You questioned after surveying around, letting go of the embrace you tightly held Ashley in.

“Went to go and check on something.. don’t worry about it.”

“..Alright. I’ll wait here if you don’t mind.” You quietly spoke, standing beside Ashley as your hand subconsciously grabbed hers, intertwining them.

And Ashley didn’t say anything about it. Just to see how her brother would react, of course.

That didn’t go well, let me tell you.

He came back, noticing you, he was so excited like a puppy seeing their owner once more, but noticing that you were holding Ashleys hand..

..For some reason it made him pissed off.

“..(____), why don’t you hold my hand instead?”

You were already starting in his direction to tackle him into a hug, but Ashley pulled you back.

“Nah.. I think she’ll stay right here, holding my hand.”

“Ashley.”

“Yes, dear Andyyyy?”

“Let her go. Right now.”

“Mm, nah.” She chuckled seeing him get so riled up.

He flat up walked on over to you two, grabbed you by the waist, swiftly pulling you away from Ashley.

“Oh you jackass!!!”

But he didn’t care.

And then, you all heard another car..

Thats when everything else unfolded.

They killed that man..

And you witnessed it.

Then again though, he was a murderer as well..

..but why??

You were shaking like a leaf, catching Andy’s attention.

“Shh shh.. its okay. Theres no need to cry or worry, alright? It was in self-defense. I promise this won’t happen again.” He consoled you, hugging you closely as you nodded.

Ashley looked baffled though, one of her eyes slightly twitching.

..guess they’ll just have to not kill in front of you from now on.

Well, moving on from this..

You had made some fake ID’s for them (made by another friend of yours, of course) along with some birth certificates, you just wanted to help them get on their feet again.

That would.. slightly backfire.

No matter what, he became so obsessed with you, he started stalking you, watching you do anything around the house. When you’d turn to see if anyone was watching, no-one was there..

You brushed it off multiple times, but even when you were in the shower, or changing, you felt the same feeling. It was all.. unnerving. You hated it. You wanted it to stop.

But, it continued and continued, and it got to the point where you started asking Andrew if you could sleep with him for the night, to which he immediately accepted; surprising you.

You got into his bed, him pulling the covers over you despite the fact you already had a blanket with you.. but that was fine. You rested your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around your lower back, pressing you closer to him.

And strangely, it seemed like all of the eyes that were previously watching you were gone. You could finally drift off to sleep, where Ashley would make fun of you both each time, but stopped suddenly after a bit..

But you shrugged it off as she was just bored of the joke now that you have cuddled with Andrew so many times now just for you to feel safer within your own home!

Little did you know that the person you were cuddling with was the one watching you all along..

His fingers threaded through your hair, humming ever so softly. He kissed the crown of your head, your forehead, your cheeks, and then eventually, your lips. You tasted sweet to him, sweet like nothing he’d ever tasted before in contrast to his usual taste of mint and cigarettes within his mouth.

He wanted more of it..

He then continued kissing your lips, now making out with your unconscious body, taking breaks in between to undress you from your nightclothes, underwear, and so forth.

In your sleep, you felt something.. swishing within your mouth. It was warm, tasting everything within your mouth almost, like it was trying to claim it!

You slowly awoke very sadly since you couldn’t get your beauty rest, trying to find the cause, just to see it was Andy. The person you were so close with. You instinctively pushed him away, or tried.

As much as you wanted to- you couldn’t hurt him. What would be everything you went for then? What would Ashley do?? You’d have to live with the guilt of possibly hurting one of your friends.

..is he even your friend anymore?

He took notice of that, opening his eyes instantaneously as he felt your touch. He pulled away for a moment, examining your expression.

The room was silent, the atmosphere was palpable as he turned to an emotionless face. He moved you closer to him.

“Andy!?” You yelped out as your body became tense.

“..Shit— shit, no, fuck, i’m so sorry. This is wrong-“ Andrew pushed himself away, getting up and threading his hands through his hair. His eyes were wide as he realized what he’d done.

“..Andrew, why??..”

“I’m sorry- that was disgusting- I’m sorry!..”

Your facial expression was bewildered, but you eventually just frowned and grabbed his arm (which was shaking.)

“Andrew, you should’ve asked me first so I could’ve consented. Especially if you have some sort of som—“

“Wait!.. how are you so calm?!” You really aren’t.

“..I’m not. But I would’ve just want some more information- some sort of talk about this entire situation before we could do anything.” Caressing his hand, you smiled softly, and he simply just stared at you for at least 5 seconds straight.

Consent talk?

Consent talk!!

He gave a long ass apology for his actions, immediately about to just get up and leave.

But you stopped him to talk further talked about the situation. You talked about what you really wanted.

And if you both were ready.

Even though all of this didn’t happen throughout one entire night, you planned everything out. What you two were going to do.

If you wanted a relationship.

Or just a situationship.

You both decided to test the waters first before deciding that.

You need to get out. Leave.

What are you doing?

Please, go.

He’ll kill you too.

You couldn’t fall asleep after everything that happened, so he ran a bath for you and him, washing you both.

After that though, he dressed you in some more comfortable clothes for the afternoon it seemed despite being early morning now.

He had you sit in his lap, smoking (trying to get you to smoke as well), tending to your wounds.

And that’s when Ashley came to you both later within the morning, groaning.

“Why was there so much noise in the night?.. could barely sleep..”

Safe to say, you gave a.. believable excuse

Wow- theres a lot here! But, I hope you all enjoyed!!

[mtchacffinz]

of the greed in spirit

prompt! Jing Yuan's a service dom (real) + what's he like in bed?

content! NSFW, pillow princess!reader, soft service dom! jing yuan, headcanons ahead, praise, face riding, c^m eating, mentioned sq^rting, p^ssy drunk

note! [opens curtains] slutting this general out (im kidding) im rambling here, so its a bulleted fic 🩷 enjoy my thoughts!! i have so much to say..

With him, you dont need to say nothing. Unless it's the first time Jing Yuan's been with you on the sheets, he's the type to retain minor details on how you like your things through clothings, and even your preferred fancy interiors of different wares. Having said that, he definitely knows how to keep you going.

Foreplay is important. Heck, Jing Yuan does it so well you'd think it's the main course! Unknowingly, he'd approach you slowly— enticing you with his sweet coos and hums right next to your ear. Jing Yuan's big palms travel to your hips, you gulp almost nervously. His hands are tracing circles on your back. Jing Yuan's touches are featherweight, it feels agonizing, electric.

"Everything alright?" He's a little cruel. After subtly riling you up, he's going to ask for your welfare. That doesn't matter. What happens is, no matter how you reply, you always find yourself under his figure.

Jing Yuan's charm is in his subtleness. His presence may be grand, but those small antics he does greatly helps with his lovely expressions. The way he nibbles on your neck while you entangle your hands on his grey hair, when he gives you the sweetest kisses on your knuckles everytime you reach over to him, nuzzling deeper into your palm there right after.. you can tell the general just thrives on pleasing you.

You noticed he barely pays attention to his needs as well. He's so busy eating your cunt out you could only imagine how suffocating it is to have his erection confined in his pants. The thing is, Jing Yuan doesn't even mind. His cock can twitch and leak precum all it wants, the general's grip on your thighs were still firm, unrelenting.

You'd squirm and whimper, god he loves hearing you when you do. He'd reward you with praises that even if you just finished, your sex would just twitch in anticipation. Maybe if you soil his fingers with your juices, he'd even put up a show for you eating his fingers out clean.

If there's something he's not willing to do in bed, that would be hurting you. As soon as there's even a hint of discomfort in your side, Jing Yuan would immediately halt any activity to see your condition. Despite being a general, usually known for his accomplishments in a very stern and relentless environment, his eyes could get so soft. It never fails to melt your heart everytime he looks at you with those saffron optics. You can't help but reach over to his frame and shower his face with butterfly kisses.

Jing Yuan doesn't say it, but he doesn't need to verbalize it when he's basically grabbing onto the plush your ass when you sit down on his face. He loves it when you sit. Even when he's gasping for air, especially when he's gasping for air— he'd be holding onto you for dear life like your his life line. Something about you riding yourself senseless on his nose while his tongue's chasing after those sensitive nerves on your slit has his dick twitching. As soon as he hears you utter the words "Lay down" from those pretty lips of yours, he wastes no time ♡

Another thing is when you cum so hard you twitch and lag into his arms. Gripping the sheets, eyes decorated with dried tears, a broken moan breaking out of your throat.. it's like a celestial noise no one can recreate but you.

He's fond of giving. Shen it's his time to be receiving, his demeanor doesn't change much. He's still gentle, guiding you to what he wants. You absolutely love how he communicates. Jing Yuan asks for requests with term of endearments and pairs with with handful of praises. Maybe this is why you try your best when you service him? After all, he does so well with your body, its only fair you'd return his diligence, right?

When he moans, Jing Yuan doesn't whimper, no. He groans deep. Sometimes he'd attempt to curb it, but after finding out that it actually gets you off— he can't help but let it out once and a while. He'd be putting away stray hair strands from your face when his cock is deep all the way to your throat, trying your best to take it in.

As soon as theres that knot below his stomach, waiting to snap, you always insist on taking it from your mouth. You love it when he breaks in you, broken moans intensifying just as he grips your head down his crotch. When he finally catches his breath after moments of breathlessness, Jing Yuan makes sure you're okay, profusely apologizing.

He understands you get tired, so he always prepare something for you after every session with him. He views this time with you as intimate, sacred of heart. There'd be scents you'd like around the room, may it be incense or candles, sometimes he'd even massage any muscles you find sore or tired. But often times, you'd just want him to clean you up and stroke your head while cuddling him up— just listening to his heart beat accompanied by the calming rise and fall of his chest.

so how was it? (⁠*⁠˘⁠︶⁠˘⁠*⁠)⁠.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ i saw this man right up my alley and went "oh no" cus i know I'm gonna write atleast ONE thing about him!

[silvergyus]

thinking about line cook yeonjun...

sfw. tw: cigarettes

he started after you. a new cook to fill in on the line and help with to-go orders. it was a relief honestly and had been a while since there was anyone new on staff

you notice him immediately. he's tall and good looking and doesn't yell like some of the other cooks

you shoot each other flirty looks for a few weeks whenever you're in the kitchen picking up your tables' orders

you get a moment away from the bustle of the restaurant, ducking out into the alley to calm yourself in the cool night air. yeonjun is out on his smoke break

he looks so cool, his bangs falling out of his backwards hat, his lanky form leaning against the wall, the cigarette between his lips burning orange in the blue night

you talk to him, finally, actually talk to him. it's short, but it's enough

he draws you in, as cliche as line cooks and waitresses are, but you can't resist him

he puts his number in your phone before flicking the butt of his cigarette onto the dirty concrete, grinding it out with the heel of his beat up sneaker. he smells like smoke when he leans in to whisper in your ear, telling you to text him when you're off

he goes back inside, leaving you stunned, ears burning and butterflies fluttering in your stomach

the other waitstaff immediately notice the shift in your behavior. they joke that you must have a crush on the new guy, that it's finally happening, your waitress rite of passage- crushing on a line cook

you deny it- nothing happened between you two!- but they don't believe you

it doesn't help the way that yeonjun winks at you when you go back to run orders

the way he saves you food and whips up "something special" for you from time to time

the special treatment he seems to give you and no one else

weeks go by and you text him only from time to time, the conversation barely leaving the topic of work

but he's sweet, flirting and chatting with you when it's slow

he comforts you when you spill sauce on yourself, a huge mess down your front and all over your shoes. he goes so far as to come to the front and tell your manager that you need to go home when he refuses to cut you

it's the first time you see yeonjun actually mad

but his voice is still soft when he takes you under his arm back to the tiny server station so you can grab your bag

he has that same gentleness when you can't stop the tears that form after hours serving a picky table, doing your best, your brightest smile plastered on in the middle of a dinner rush. the table hogged all your attention and kept you from being assigned others, only for them to leave no tip

yeonjun smells like kitchen grease and lingering cigarette as he pulls you aside, rubbing circles on your back as you try to calm down, letting the frustration rush out and away in his arms

you stay late that night rolling silverware in a back booth. he walks you to your car

he looks at you sincerely, tilting his head to look through his lashes

"I meant it when I said to text me. we can talk about more than just work, you know"

your body immediately heats up and you thank years of serving experience for letting you keep your cool

the other servers have a sixth sense, you swear, the way they all know about your date with yeonjun before you even say anything

the two of you are the talk of the team, everyone wanting to know what his place is like, how good of a kisser he is

"you did kiss him, right? if I were-"

"okay that's enough" you cut off your coworker before she can speculate too far

you like to keep what you and yeonjun do outside of work between just the two of you

even though he still gives you special treatment when you are on the clock

tagging: @doumachi (ty for screaming about him with me), @miupow , @dearlyjun , @https-yeonjun , @theresawtf

[sweetestcaptainhughes]

Mam can I request ❤️‍🩹16❤️‍🩹 with jack hughes please 🥹🫶

I am truly sorry this and your other ask are just now being answered nonnie. But thank you for requesting! 🫶🏻🫶🏻 Also so sorry in advance because this will be sad.

200 Followers Celebration Masterlist

The "playful" flirting that they mean with every bit of their heart.

Everyone claims they have a photic soulmate. Someone who they met in their lives at the exact moment they were suppose to and immediately clicked. Everyone in life was suppose to have a Monica to their Rachel, or a Cristina to their Meredith. That is was Jack Hughes was to you, except for one small problem you were in love with him and he saw you as a best friend only.

You've only known Jack for two years now, actually meeting through his brother Luke. Luke was a 'friend of a friend' when you went to Michigan State. As soon as Luke met you he swore you were like the girl version of his older brother Jack. Someone who was quick-witted, charming when they wanted to be, could be the center of attention naturally, and when it came to a filter on their mouth almost nonexistent. But you were also someone who had secrets, who acted out of feelings of low self-esteem almost unconsciously and did what they thought they needed to do to survive. Turns out Jack was like that too, only it was a big enough secret that he would never dare let his little brother know, because he was older so he had to be stronger in his mind.

Meeting Jack two years ago when you were about to graduate Mich and move to Manhattan to start your life, and meeting Jack it just clicked. Luke was right, you were two peas in a pod, except only one of you was in love with the other. Due to your quick-witted mind and zero filter, you ended up accidentally flirting with Jack a lot, and he would flirt back, as the natural flirt that he is. But each time it was like a crane was being released again to smash into your heart. It happened everyday, it's even to the point where Jack thinks shameless flirting is just how you communicate now with each other. But today him flirting with you pushed you to the edge, and you had to excuse yourself to the bathroom to collect yourself.

Today you and Jack were eating lunch today in his apartment. Luke was in their living room watching something on T.V. Sitting down at the table, eating some pizza that you had just ordered from down the street.

Eating quickly because you hadn't eaten yet that day, you didn't realize that some sauce was on the side of you lips and your chin. Just focused on your plate and eating to help your growling stomach from your hungry. Finally looking up Jack saw the sauce immidately and smirked. "Hun" he always called you that before he said something flirtatious. "you made a little mess and got something on you." taking his finger and going to lightly touch your lips and catch the sauce before it dipped down your shirt.

"thats what he said" you spoke quietly trying to control your breathing and slow down your fast heartrate at how close Jack was to you, entering your personal space.

Immidately his smirk breaks out into a full grown smile as his mouth twitches as he says "yeah i would after your mouth would be full" Dipping his head down to your ear he whispered "with my cum."

It's like your body just reacts, you feel your stomach drop the familiar flutter of butterflies in your stomach, feeling yourself pull your thighs together. "baby if i sucked you off, i wouldn't risk any of wasting any of your cum I'm a swallow not a spitter."

"yeah wanna test that theory" he speaks in a low voice and you swear that your already feeling a pool form the wetness forming in your leggings, cursing at yourself for not wearing underwear this morning because you didn't want underwear lines.

"name a time and place Jacky" forming a small smile on your lips.

Jack laughs almost crying tears of laughter, as he backs out of your personal space finally. Gripping his stomach from laughing so hard as he plops himself in his chair. Once he calms down he turns back to his pizza.

Suddenly your stomach hurting but not from butterflies like a few moments before but rather anxiety because you let yourself believe that Jack was flirting with you because he actually wanted you. Quietly you excuse yourself to the bathroom, closing the door behind you. All you could think of as you watched your tears drop as you starred at your reflection in the mirror was 'how much longer can I live through this pain, of being in love with Jack Rowden Hughes when all he wants is to flirt and laugh at me'. After what felt like an eternity you felt yourself calm down enough to clean your face and put on a fake smile as you went back out to finish your lunch. Because even though you were in pain, you feared that a life without Jack Hughes would hurt more than a life with him where he flirted with you, taking a sledgehammer to your heart with each word.

[goodgirlformatt]

M.S. Just a Taste Pt. 2

Summary: In which you’re enemies with Matt, but he helps you fall asleep…

Warnings: smuttyyy, p in v, matt x fem!reader, 1st person perspective, domish?!matt, subish?!fem, praise kinda, pet names, not proofread

a/n: Thank you for all the love on pt 1! tbh i had no idea where to go on this, so i hope it’s good 💀

“tired now?” he asks me with a devilish smirk as he looks up at me with my mess on his face.

I look down at him between my thighs with the mess on his face. fuck. that’s so hot.

“i ask ya a question, pretty girl.” he says in a low tone, wiping his face clean with those slender fingers.

God how he made my stomach fill with butterflies when he talks like that. And “pretty girl”? fuck.

“hm?” He says, finally snapping out of my daze. “Cause i can always make you tired, sweetheart.” He says, kissing from my belly button, to my sternum, and up to my neck.

I let out a small moan from the sensation of his lips against my skin. I shake my head at him, letting him know I’m not tired just quite yet.

Another devilish smile grows on his face.

“well, can I help with that?” He asks me, lips brushing against my ear. I nod quickly.

“words, pretty girl.” he says in a low tone.

“please…” I say to him in a quiet tone, not quite a whisper.

He smiles against my skin on my neck, leaving more kisses, and a few occasional nibbles. I start to squirm beneath him, needing his body immediately.

“Mmm, someone’s impatient..” Matt says as he leaves another nibble.

“Matt…Matt, please..c’mon..” I mumble out to him, my eyes falling closed again as he kisses along my neck.

“Since you asked nicely.” He says, switching to the other side of my neck. “and you’re being such a good girl.” He whispers, feeling his warm breath crawl across my skin.

He then reaches into his nightstand drawer, grabbing a condom. This makes the realization really hit me. We’re about to fuck.

I eagerly toy with the waistband of his flannel pajama pants, snapping the elastic against his skin, earning a groan from him.

I smile up at him before pulling down his pants along with his boxers. My eyes widen when I finally see how big he really is. Not very thick, but fucking long.

He smirks at me and takes his pants and boxers off completely before tearing open the condom and rolling it on his length. I can’t help but watch the rubber cover his red tip dripping with precum, then slowly roll down his cock. I bite my lip just from the sight.

“Now be a good girl, and keep it quiet, alright?” He says in a low tone right in my ear. I nod my head at him quickly.

“what did i say? use your words.” He whispers.

“I’ll…I’ll keep it quiet, I promise.” I whisper back to him nodding my head.

“Good. If you don’t, I’ll have to muffle ya.” He says, a grin growing on his face.

My heart beats fast. What did he mean by that specifically? Honestly, it just made me excited.

He rubs his tip against my begging cunt, making me bite my lip again to keep in any moans. I feel his tip slowly line up with my entrance and push in gently, earning a quiet moan out of my throat.

He pushes in as much of his length he can till he bottoms out. I close my eyes again and focus on not making a sound.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He breathes into my ear. He starts to move slowly in and out of my pussy. And honestly, this was enough for him to come right then and there. Obviously-he held together.

God he feels so good. He fills me up perfectly. I wrap my hands around his back, holding tightly.

“mmm, fuckk, you feel so fucking good for me.” he praises into my ear, quickly picking up the pace. I let out a moan when he does.

“keep quiet, princess. wouldn’t want to cover that pretty mouth of yours.” he says in a low tone, followed by a couple quiet grunts.

My eyes close again as I try to regain focus on keeping quiet. But all I can think of is how fucking good he feels. As he continues to speed up the pace until he basically hammering into me, I let out a few quiet moans, gradually getting louder.

“Do i need to cover your mouth?” He says quickly at me, almost like he’s snapping. But i knew he wasn’t angry.

Honestly, I kinda liked the idea of his hand over my mouth, keeping me quiet with those long, slender fingers. I nod my head.

He follows pursuit and covers my mouth with his hand. I start to moan into it, still trying to be quiet but kinda failing.

He continues to let out those quiet grunts and groans, and sometimes even a whimper. And oh my god was it hot as fuck. I could listen to those noises all day.

“Fuck, you feel so fucking good.” He says. I feel his cock twitch inside me, I knew he’s close.

With the hand not covering my mouth, he reaches down, sprawling his fingers over my lower stomach and using his thumb to rub tight circles over my clit.

With his thumb touching me, his cock pounding in me, his groans next to my ear, fuck I’m close too. My eyes roll back and I moan louder into his hand, moving my body and starting to dig my nails into his back lightly.

“Can I come on you, sweetheart?” He asks me in a whisper, almost a whiny tone. I can definitely tell he’s close. I quickly nod my head at him.

He waits until I come all over his dick, the knot in my stomach finally coming undone. And with that, he quickly pulls out and takes off the condom. With just a couple pumps, he comes all on my stomach and even a bit on my tits.

I breathe heavily and loosen my grip on his back. He stays there for a couple of seconds before leaving a kiss on my lips. He puts back on his boxers and pants before getting me a washcloth.

With the washcloth he cleans my throbbing pussy very gently and wipes his come off my naked body. Just seeing me naked in his bed made him want a round two.

He hands me my clothes, helping me get dressed if I need. All I put back on was my panties and shirt though.

“you have to be tired now, right?” he says with a chuckle, laying down next to me.

“yeah, definitely tired now.” i say with a chuckle of my own. I stare up at the ceiling for a moment.

did i really just fuck my enemy?

I feel his arms bring me into him and I snuggle up a bit to him, eventually falling asleep.

and all the time i was trying to fall asleep, i could only think one thing: god-fucking-dammit. things are going to be so complicated.

[tightjeansjavi]

Slow Hands | Chapter 6

“you're like a mirror, reflecting me”

A/N: it’s a double chapter weekend bby! Although, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing regarding the pain I’m about to cause. But hey, not everything can be butterflies and rainbows all the time, right? This chapter will take your emotions for a spin. There is violence and triggering themes. Tread carefully.

Summary: your first date in over twenty years doesn’t go as planned.

~word count: 5.2k~

Pairing | Joel Miller x f! reader

Warnings: angst, trauma responses, self-deprecating thoughts triggered by trauma, negative body image, trauma triggers, mentions of bodily scars, mild violence, swearing, confrontations, use of one homophobic swear from an asshat (dyke) the word rape is mentioned, panic attack, unwanted attention, hurt feelings, protective! Joel, feral! Darkish! Joel, Soft! Joel, flirting, internal thoughts, slow burn, emotional development, deep conversation, pet names, no age gap, readers nickname is beanie (coffee beans) reader has no physical descriptions (skin color/body description) +18 minors dni! Please let me know if I missed any warnings. I wanted to included the two words that can be triggering ahead of time. Please heed the warnings.

main masterlist series masterlist playlist

The last time you had ever gone on a date was a week before outbreak day. You had met the guy in line at your local grocery store and he had swooped in when you nearly dropped an entire carton of milk. That’s where you gained your catchphrase; fiddlesticks. He had taken you to a quiet cozy Italian restaurant and you remember your smile being infectious. It had been years since you dated anyone, and this guy was giving you all those warm fuzzy feelings that you so deeply yearned for. Your second date was set for September 26, 2003. You often wondered during the oddest and sudden moments if he had survived. He had called you an hour before the date informing you that he might be late because his mother was feeling ill and he was going to go check up on her. That was the last time you ever heard from him.

Now you were in your bathroom in Jackson with the comforting glow of a flickering candle on the countertop. The temperature of the shower was scalding and created a thick sheet of steam that enveloped your mirror in a dewy cloak. As the condensation began to slowly dissipate you found yourself staring into the void of your mirror. You used one hand to hold the towel wrapped around your body in place while you used your other hand to apply a bit of homemade moisturizer to your skin. A year ago you had come to Maria with the idea of creating some self-care products for the women of Jackson. From moisturizer to face wash and homemade candles. Only a handful of the women came to your home to sample the products. In the moment it had stung your heart like a thousand needles that only a few people, including Maria and Dina showed up. You just wanted to do something nice for the community. So much for trying.

You have to take the towel off eventually you know..

That inner voice that plagued your brain was fully awake now and ready to onslaught an attack on your already sensitive emotional state. You hated seeing your skin. You hated seeing all of your scars. Your body was littered in them, and while they were marks showing that you were a survivor, you still felt bile rise in your throat every time you had to look at them.

Take the towel off.

I don’t want to.

Take it off.

Joel will think you're hideous when he sees your scars.

No, he won’t. Joel isn’t like that.

No? Are you sure?

You’re ugly.

An unfinished hack job.

Stop. Please.

Please.

“Please fucking stop.” You nearly whimpered as you stared back at your broken reflection. The towel dropped from your grip and you immediately clung to the porcelain sink. Your knuckles ached from how hard you were gripping the edges of the sink.

An ugly, worthless, waste of goddamn space and air.

Tears began to freely fall as you forced yourself to look at the scars that littered your body like a torn, shredded canvas. As soon as your fingertips lightly brushed the jagged scar that curved under the swell of your left breast, you fell back into the wall, sinking down with a gut-wrenching sob that shattered you to the core.

You weren’t sure how many hours had passed but it must have been a couple hours because you could faintly hear someone knocking on your front door. Joel did say he would walk with you to The Tipsy Bison at 8pm. Had you really been sitting on the floor, naked and trembling for that long?

In a haste you scrambled to your feet despite your knees feeling like wobbling jello. You snatched the towel up from the ground and quickly wrapped it back around yourself. You dressed your body in a fury as you struggled to pull a pair of jeans over your damp thighs. You threw on whatever clean t-shirt you had along with a flannel. You paused at the mouth of your closet, staring at a dress that Maria had gifted to you during your first Christmas in Jackson. It was so beautiful, delicate, and dainty. You dreamed of having the confidence to wear it one day. It was too pretty to be collecting dust like this. Your fingers brushed across the soft material with a heavy sigh. Maybe one day, but that day was not today.

fiddlesticks.

Joel was occupying himself outside on your porch while he waited for you. He went from pacing the length of the porch, to sitting on one of the steps with his hands resting between his thighs. He went the extra mile to actually style his hair and wear a shirt that wasn’t completely faded. As much as he denied that this was in fact a date, he knew in his heart that it was, and he wanted to look his absolute best for you. He felt embarrassed with how fast he rose to his feet when he heard the lock to your front door click open. He had a small bouquet of wildflowers clutched gently in his hand. Maria had helped him pick them and use a bit of twine to hold them together.

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously as his gaze landed upon your frame leaning in the open doorway.

Wow, he thought silently to himself.

She is so beautiful.

“Hey, I hope I didn’t rush ya or anythin.’ I didn’t wanna be late either, although time doesn’t really exist anymore, huh?” He stammered as his palms began to sweat. “You–look beautiful. I hope that’s not too straightforward, but what kinda gentleman would I be if I didn’t compliment ya. Sorry, i’m ramblin’ off the fuckin’ walls.” He shook his head to the side with a nervous chuckle. “Brought these for ya. Maria helped me pick ‘em. Tried to be careful n’not smash ‘em.”

You almost felt a sense of relief over the realization that Joel was just as nervous as you were. He looked like he was about to combust as he held the bouquet of flowers towards you.

“Joel, you didn’t rush me. I just..lost track of time.” You softly spoke with a reassuring smile as you gently removed the bouquet from his grasp. “Thank you, you don’t clean up so bad either. Did you do something different with your hair? I like it. These are beautiful.” You brought the flowers up to your face as you inhaled their sweet floral scent.

Joel could feel the heat rise to his cheeks as he shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans. “Yeah, I uh–jus’ wanted to look nice for the occasion. The Tipsy Bison is quite the high end establishment y’know.” He teased. It felt nice to crack a joke through his brewing nerves.

“Oh? Well, I hope I am dressed for the occasion. Let me just go put these in some water and then we can head out.”

“Darlin.’” He breathed softly like the gentle warm breeze, “You are most definitely dressed for the occasion.”

You mustered up a convincing smile before quietly slipping behind the door to the kitchen. You grabbed a spare vase from the cabinet and filled it up with a bit of water before gently placing the bouquet inside the vase. You left it on the center of the counter before you met Joel outside on the porch once more. After locking your door, he had offered you his elbow which you gratefully took. Your hand gently wrapped around his bare bicep as you walked down the steps together. The sun had just begun to set as the buzzards sang their tune, and the fireflies twinkled luminously, dancing on either side of your heads.

Joel was counting the amount of steps to the Tipsy Bison silently inside of his mind while you were counting out-loud all of the fireflies that you could see.

The bar was rowdy, but that was expected. It was the one establishment in Jackson where people could let their hair down and have fun. It was a slice of normalcy that both the young and old could enjoy.

Joel could sense your hesitation as he went to reach for the heavy-set door handle. He turned to you with a gentle expression on his weathered features. “Hey, we ain’t gotta stay for long, okay? S’okay with me. If you’re not havin’ a good time, we can leave.” He murmured. Joel wanted to make sure that you were aware that he wouldn’t be offended if you did want to leave. He just wanted you to feel comfortable and most importantly, safe.”

You responded by gently squeezing his bicep as you looked over at him. “Joel, thank you, but I'll be alright. Let's just go in and have a good time, okay? You still owe me that dance.” Your voice floated sweetly to his ears like a song.

“Don’t think I've gone and forgotten that darlin.’ I’m very much lookin’ forward to it.” He grinned.

Me too.

His hand grasped around the handle as he pushed it open, allowing you to step inside first before he followed suit behind you. You could feel the pads of his fingertips brush across your covered lower back as he maneuvered you past a group of people. His close proximity was nearly intoxicating your senses as you got a proper inducing whiff of his scent. Pine, gunsmoke, and soap with a hint of..cologne? He wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted to look nice for the occasion.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in!” Tommy remarked from behind the bar as he slipped past one of the patrol guys. He hugged his brother first, giving him a light clap on the shoulder before he turned to you. “Ain’t you lookin’ like such a peach this evenin’ Beanie. Can I getcha guys somethin’ to drink?”

Joel hugged his brother back with a light slap to his back before he pulled back one of the bar stools for you. “I’ll jus’ take a beer, and for you darlin?’ Y’want anythin?’” Joel asked you as you quietly thanked him for pulling the stool out before you sat down.

“I’ll have a beer as well.”

“You betcha. Two beers comin’ right up!” Tommy spoke an octave louder so he could hear over the music and chatter.

Two full, nearly overflowing glasses of beer were placed in front of you and Joel as he took the unoccupied seat beside you. He lifted his glass towards yours, gently clinking them together before he brought his lips to the rim of the glass and took a sip.

You mirrored his actions before setting the glass down in front of you. The beer was decent, better than you had expected it to taste. Then again, did anyone really ever drink beer for the taste? You were more of a wine person yourself. “So, this is the infamous Tipsy Bison?” You mused as you looked over at Joel as he set his glass down.

“Yep, she ain’t much, but it’s nice t’see people get together and have fun. A taste of normalcy, y’know? How’s the beer tastin?’”

“Definitely a taste of normalcy. It’s actually..pretty good? I wasn’t a big beer person before the outbreak, but maybe this is me turning over a new leaf?” You shrugged as you glanced up at him over the rim of your glass.

“Tommy perfected the recipe for it pretty well. The whiskey ain’t too shabby either. Glad that you’re enjoyin’ it darlin.’” He nodded in your direction as he took another sip from his glass. He leaned in close then so that it would be easier for you to hear him. “So, while I was out on patrol today, I finally wrote a letter to Tess. Ripped the bandaid off and everythin.’”

“Joel, that’s wonderful. How do you feel after writing it? Does it feel like there’s a weight that has been lifted from your shoulders?” He had your full and undivided attention as you gently rested your palm on the top of his hand for a gesture of comfort.

“I feel..better? Like I ain’t carryin’ all this heavy burden with me. I poured my heart out on the paper, just like ya told me to. It was hard. Like, really fuckin’ hard. I felt like I was forgivin’ myself in the process, n’lettin’ her go. That’s the main reason why I wanted ya to accompany me tonight. I was seekin’ some comfort.” He admitted softly as his eyes glanced down to where your hand rested upon his.

“Of course it was hard, it’s never easy to be vulnerable like that. I’m really proud of you for takin’ that step, Joel.” You softly responded with a small lopsided smile. “Well, you know I'm here for you regardless of the circumstances. I have to thank you.”

“For what?” He was leaned in so close now, you could nearly feel his warm breath fanning your cheeks.

“For encouraging me to go out and have a good time. I wanted to say no to your offer earlier. I was thinking of every possible way that I could get out of having to socialize like this. Joel, you’re that extra push that I didn’t realize I really fucking needed.” It wasn’t easy for you to be vulnerable like this either. You were practically throwing your heart into Joel’s weathered palms, hoping that he would hold it tenderly. There was that nagging voice trying to convince you that this was all good to be true. It poked and prodded at you, but for the first time in a long-time, you drowned the voice out.

“You ain’t gotta thank me for that darlin.’ I’ve encouraged you yeah, but at the end of the day, you’re in control of your own actions, ain’t ya? Let's make a toast to you, Beanie. Undeniably the most beautiful woman in this whole goddamn town, with a heart made of pure fuckin’ gold. I’m so happy that you exist, darlin.’ You make my life jus’ a little bit brighter.”

His eyes were twinkling dazzingly under the warm glow of the dangling fairy lights. He had no idea just how terribly you needed to hear that.

He was so happy that you exist.

You made his life brighter.

You did that.

You threw your arms around his neck gently, hugging him so tightly he felt like you were stealing the oxygen from his lungs. His arms were looping around your waist, hands splayed out across your back as he hugged you back. He got a whiff of your sweet syrupy fragrance. You smelled of saccharine peaches and honey. You smelled of home.

I could kiss him right now. I could press my lips to his and pretend that every breath that I take, I feel like I'm dying. If I kiss him now, maybe breathing won’t feel like a chore. Maybe then I'll be okay. Maybe the voices will stop, and the curtain will fall. If I kiss him now, maybe everything will fall into place. You thought to yourself as you felt the wiry patches of his beard gently scrape across your cheek as his grip around you tightened.

If I kiss her now..everything changes. If I kiss her, that means I have to keep my promise to do better. If I kiss her now, my thoughts will be consumed with her. If I kiss her now, I'll always protect her. I’ll keep her safe. If I kiss her now, I won’t be able to stop.

His eyes fluttered shut as the sounds of laughter and chatter were drowned out by his thoughts. He pressed the faintest kiss to the side of your head, just nearly grazing your temple before he slowly pulled away. You both were looking at each other like you were the only two people in the room.

He gestured towards the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the bar with a tilt of his chin. “Still wanna have that dance with me?” He rasped softly.

You were already reaching for his hand once more as you slipped off the stool. “Show me your moves, Texas.” You shot him a bold, mildly flirtatious wink as you pulled him to the dance floor. Some country folk song was being played by the live band made up of 3 men and 1 woman. You didn’t know the words to the song, but that didn’t matter. Not when Joel was delicately holding hand in his and twirling you playfully. His eyes crinkled in the corners like creases on a well-loved book. His dimples were even peeking through and making an appearance.

You both made one another feel effortlessly young again.

By the fifth song, your feet were beginning to ache and you desperately needed to pee, so Joel gently released you from his grip as he was left to his own devices. He finished off his beer when he noticed Ellie and Dina slowly swaying together. From where he was standing, he could see his kiddo blush under the fairylights as Dina whispered something in her ear. When Dina kissed Ellie for the first time, his heart felt warm. Ellie and him might not be on the best of terms, but he just wanted to see her happy and loved. It all came to a crashing halt when Seth intervened on their moment with a harsh hateful tongue.

“Jus’ what this town needs, another loud mouth dyke.” The older man spat with disgust.

Ellie had whipped around in a fury, storming right up to Seth with her finger pointed at his chest in an accusing manner. “The fuck did you just say?”

Dina was already stepping in front of her, trying to talk her down when Joel sprung into action. He couldn’t help it. His blood was absolutely boiling as he shoved Seth roughly. “Get the hell outta here. Don’t you fuckin’ talk to my kid like that. Y’hear me?!” Joel wasn’t fucking around, not in the slighest.

“Y’get your hands off me!” Seth spat back as he stumbled from the force of Joel shoving him. Maria ultimately had to step in between the two of them as she led Seth outside to cool it off.

Joel’s fists were clenched tightly at his sides and his jaw was as sharp as glass. His face softened when his gaze landed upon Dina and Ellie as he approached. “Y’alright kiddo?”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Ellie hissed as she faced him with a disappointed look etched across her face.

Joel struggled to hold his composure as Ellie’s words stung like a poisoned blade piercing his gut. “He had no right. He had no fuckin’ right Ellie.” He tried to reason with her.

“And you do?!” Ellie responded exasperatedly as Dina was trying yet again to pull her away from the confrontation. “I don’t need your fuckin’ help, Joel.” Ellie knew her words were harsh, and she knew they would hurt him, but she was exhausted and frustrated that he lied to her for so long.

Joel’s face fell as he slowly looked around the bar to find faces staring back at him. He cleared his throat as he slowly backed off, “right.” He mumbled quietly.

He wasn’t able to mourn his hurt feelings for very long when he heard a scream. Not just any scream, your scream. A frightened, blood curdling scream that rattled his bones and sent hot blood rushing through his veins as he took off towards the bathrooms.

His pulse rose to a high level as he shoved open the women’s bathroom door in a haste. The last thing he expected was to find you violently thrashing on the ground while Tommy was desperately trying to calm you down.

“DON’T TOUCH ME!” You cried out desperately as you clawed at Tommy’s arms.

DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME! DON’T TOUCH ME!” You wailed as Tommy was gently yet firmly holding your wrist in his grasp.

“BEANIE!” Tommy yelled equally as desperate. “It’s me. It’s Tommy. You’re safe–”

Joel was on his knees in an instant as he physically pushed his brother out of the way, forcing Tommy to release his grip on your wrists as you scrambled back towards the sinks, fear laced in your irises as you tried to tuck yourself into the corner.

“Tommy, what the fuck happened?!” Joel whispered harshly. He didn’t want to yell and freak you out any further than you already were. He knew that he needed to remain calm for your sake.

“Fuck if I know Joel! I heard her screamin’ and came in here and she was just thrashing on the ground. She was mumblin’ to herself about someone touchin’ her.” Tommy responded with a harsh breath as he raked his fingers through his hair.

“Who touched her, Tommy.” Joel’s voice dropped an octave. He sounded calm, and menacing all at once. His pupils were already turning a shade darker as his jaw clenched so tightly, Tommy was afraid it would break.

“She said that Lucas stopped her on the way to the bathroom. They were chatting and when she tried to leave, he–”

“He what. What the fuck did he do to her Tommy.” His face trembled with burning rage as he struggled to keep his yelling at bay.

“He grabbed her. I don’t know if it was in a suggestive way or what. All I know is she flipped out after the fact and then this is how I found her.”

Joel released a shuddered breath as his eyes fluttered shut for a moment. His nostrils flared as he exhaled. He could feel the adrenaline pumping in his veins already as he stood back up. His heart shattered when he saw your entire body facing away from him as he quietly and hesitantly approached.

You heard the creak in his knees as he crouched down a few feet away from you.

“Beanie, hey. Honey, it’s Joel. Can you..look at me please darlin?’” His tone was lengths softer than it previously was with Tommy. He made no attempt to try and touch you in your vulnerable state.

You slowly turned your chin over your shoulder, struggling to make eye contact with him as your eyes nervously darted around the room. You were desperately trying to find something to focus on in an attempt to ground yourself.

“Beanie, focus on me honey. You’re okay. You’re safe now. It’s jus’ me and Tommy in here. No one else is comin’ in, okay? I promise.” He murmured reassuringly.

When your gaze finally landed upon him, his heart shattered right down the middle. Splintered off into a million tiny fucking pieces. You looked terrified.

“Please don’t touch me, Joel.” You croaked out above a whisper.

“I ain’t gonna touch you without your permission Beanie. You have my word.” His eyes stayed locked on yours in a softened look as he waited for you to give him permission to approach further.

When I get my hands on this motherfucker, I'm gonna kill him. Gonna make him wish he was never born.

A total of ten minutes had passed by before you were slowly and hesitantly scooting from your makeshift hiding spot between the sinks. Your face was puffy and blotchy with tears as you reached for Joel’s hands. “I’m–I'm sorry. I–I didn’t mean to cause such a scene.” You mumbled as he gently grasped your hands in his.

“Beanie, you did nothin’ wrong at all, honey. This is not your fault.” Joel was careful with his word choice.

“He didn’t–he didn’t even–we were just talking and–” fresh tears were beginning to brew along your waterline as you struggled to form a coherent sentence.

Joel released your hands for a brief moment before you felt his skin make contact with yours once more. His calloused palms came to gently rest around your cheeks as he held your face in his hands so delicately. “You listen to me, alright? I don’t care if y’all were jus’ talkin.’ Hell, I don’t care if y’all were flirtin.’ He had no right to touch you Beanie. No right at all. Doesn’t matter what the circumstances were, he put his hands on ya, and that ain’t right.” He whispered firmly as you leaned into his soft touch subconsciously. “I need you..to stay in here with Tommy, okay? He’s gonna take care of ya for a minute and i’ll be right back, okay? I’ll be right back for ya baby.”

Baby.

He pressed a featherlight kiss to your temple before he slowly dropped his hands from your face as he stood up. Tommy placed his hand along his shoulder to try and stop him. Tommy knew his brother well enough to know what he was about to go do. As a mediator, he couldn’t let that happen.

“Joel..” Tommy warned him under his breath as he tightened his grip around his shoulder.

“Don’t Tommy. Don’t fuckin’ tell me what to do. I need you to get her a glass of water, and then just sit here with her. Don’t leave her alone, y’hear me? I will go take care of this.” It wasn’t a suggestion, it was a demand from the older Miller brother.

“Joel, y’know I can’t let you go’n do that.” Tommy sighed.

“Don’t care. Goin’ to do it anyway.” Joel bit back as he yanked his shoulder from his brother's grip and slipped past the bathroom door that was left ajar.

Most of the bar-goers had gone home for the evening, including Dina and Ellie. The patrol guys were still out, and Joel was seeing red when he saw Lucas laughing with Cody and the rest of the guys. His footsteps were heavy along the wooden floors as he approached. He loomed over the table as his calloused hands came to rest along the back of the chair Lucas was presently sitting in. “Get the fuck up.” Joel hissed behind him.

“Joel? What the hell man, what’s the problem?” Lucas craned his head upwards towards the older man.

“I said, GET THE FUCK UP!” Joel’s voice boomed as Lucas’s face fell.

“Hey man, no need for a’that–” He was caught off guard when Joel yanked him up from the lapels of his jacket. “When I fuckin’ tell you to do somethin’, you do it. You don’t fuckin’ question my orders ever. Y’hear me boy?!” his voice was laced with venom as he dragged the younger man away from the table.

“Joel, get the fuck off of me! What the hell is the meanin’ of this?!” Lucas barked back as he was dragged out the door and into the alley. His shoulder ached painfully when Joel shoved him with all of his force against the stone wall.

“Y’fuckin’ touch her?! HUH?! Answer me!” Joel demanded as he yanked him by his jacket once more.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKIN’ ABOUT JOEL!” Lucas bit back as he attempted to push Joel off of him. Despite the older man's age, he still overpowered Lucas without breaking a sweat as he flipped him around with his arms painfully twisted behind his back, and the side of his face scraping against the wall, drawing beads of blood to the wounded surface.

“Don’t make me fuckin’ ask you again. Did you fuckin’ touch Beanie?!” He growled as he twisted his arms further. “Fuckin’ answer me, Lucas!”

“Are you fuckin’ insinuatin’ that I raped her?! For fuck sakes Joel! I grabbed her fuckin’ arm and she flipped! That’s all I did!” He cried out as he thrashed against the wall. “That’s all I did man, I swear!” He pleaded.

“Y’grabbed her arm?! That’s it?!” Joel bellowed threateningly.

“I swear, that’s all I did man! She was walkin’ away and I grabbed her arm to tell ‘er that she looked nice, and she freaked out! She’s fuckin–” His voice was caught in his throat when Joel had twisted his right wrist at such an unnatural angle, the bone had snapped from the pressure and sent the younger man buckling over in pain as he sank down into the wall.

“You never fuckin’ lay your hands on her again. Y’hear me?! Fuckin’ touch her again, and i’ll break the other one.” Joel hissed as he grabbed ahold of the back of his head and yanked it harshly. “Y’touch her again, and i'll kill you with my bare hands. Do I make myself clear?” He growled against the younger man’s ear before releasing his head with a firm shove forward. “Go the fuck home before I change my mind.” He spat with disgust.

Lucas was scrambling to his feet in a hurry as he cradled his broken wrist in his good hand. He took one look at Joel before he shoved past him.

Joel waited until he could no longer see his shadowy silhouette in the distance before he returned to the bar. Inside he found you sitting on one of the stools with a cup of water held in your trembling hands, and a light blanket resting along your shoulders. Maria was on your left, and Tommy was on your right.

“I’ll make sure she gets home safe.” Joel announced as he approached with his hand outstretched towards you.

You slowly lifted your chin upwards to look at him. Your lower lip wobbled as you slowly slipped off the stool and placed your clammy palm in his. If only you had known what he had just done to Lucas in the alley minutes ago. Would you be afraid?

Joel acknowledged Tommy and Maria with a tight nod as he laced his fingers through yours. He whispered softly to you that everything was going to be okay, but you didn’t hear him.

The walk back to your home was in dead silence sans the crickets chirping and the leaves along the tree branches gently swaying in the breeze. You hadn’t spoken a single word as Joel gently sat you down on the couch. He made you a cup of tea that he tirelessly tried to coax you to drink, but you wouldn’t budge. You were closing in on yourself faster than he could keep up.

He is now sitting alongside you, playing with his fingers nervously. When you finally spoke, he could barely detect your voice from how soft and timid you sounded. His face fell for the third time that night from the words you uttered.

“Please leave, Joel.” Your voice cracked as your throat was rubbed raw from how hard you had been screaming.

“Beanie..” He softly pleaded with you.

“Joel, please. I need you to leave.” You whispered.

The couch creaked from his weight lifting from the cushions. He didn’t have much fight left in him after the night's events. What was supposed to be an evening filled with fun, drastically changed in a blink of an eye. He respected your wishes as his boots padded softly to the front door. He paused as he pushed down on the door handle, praying that you’d change your mind and ask him to stay. You didn’t, so he left.

He was greeted to an empty home. No lights on. No shitty puns. No Ellie. No you.

He cried himself to ruin in the shower with the water beating down on his back like a million ice shards. His sobs wrecked through his entire being as the weight of his actions crushed into his spine like a tumultuous wave. He had failed once again.

Banners made by the lovely @saradika 🤎

[bluehoodiewoozi]

DRABBLE MARATHON #15:

WEN JUNHUI + first love

1.5k words // warnings: alcohol consumption.

This party would be fun – at least so you had been told. It would just be a cute little celebration of a year well-spent, complete with only the best drinks and culinary goods. Dress code: ugly Christmas sweaters recommended but not mandatory.

And yet, you felt like you were trapped, stuck in a vast ocean of Christmas decorations, gingerbread cookies and Vernon’s holiday remixes of all the best songs. 

It’s not that you didn’t like socialising or meeting people. Minghao’s house was full of your friends and acquaintances and you were having the time of your life until he drunkenly told you a secret: Junhui would be coming to the party too, right as soon as his plane landed.

Junhui – the first man to ever make your heart pound, the first man to kiss your lips,  the first boyfriend you had had in college, the first everything. And while he wasn’t the last, no one else compared. 

You hadn’t seen him in two years. Your last memory of him was the day he left for his hometown a week after graduation. 

“I’ll come and find you again one day,” he had sworn that day as the two of you shared tearful goodbyes, giving the other a piece of your shattered hearts to keep. 

For reasons unknown to the both of you, you had decided to not continue your relationship at a distance. Long distance being painful was the excuse you gave when someone asked. 

But now, after two years, the distance would be no more. No more excuses, no more longing – in just a short time, he would be in the same room as you again. 

“How much have you had to drink?” Mingyu wondered and plucked the glass from your hands. “You’re all pale.”

“Jun’s coming,” you whispered, panic restricting your chest while butterflies fluttered their wings in excitement just the same. “He’s coming to the party.”

Mingyu hummed in thought. “Yeah, I think Hao mentioned something about that.”

“Do you think he remembers me?” 

“He promised he would, didn’t he?`” He nudged your side gently before offering a reassuring smile. “Junhui doesn't break his promises. Besides,” he sighed, “he always asked about you when we called.”

The butterflies won, for now. “He did?”

“Every single time. You’ll be fine.”

Just as you were about to come to terms with the words — or fight them, perhaps –, Soonyoung’s voice broke your little illusion of there being more time. “JUN! OH MY GOD, YOU ACTUALLY CAME?!”

He squealed and and jumped around and screamed like a little kid receiving his favourite toy for Christmas before dashing through the lines of guests and tackling a tall figure in a hug. 

“I missed you, man!” he cried, now sobbing into the man’s shoulder – no doubt drunk out of his mind. “Don’t ever leave again, Junhui!”

Junhui laughed – god, had you missed his laugh. “I missed you too, Soonyoung.”

“It’s Tiger,” he was promptly corrected by the crying  man. 

Junhui blinked and patted his back. “I– Sure. I missed you, Tiger.”

‘Tiger’ sobbed louder at that and hugged him even tighter, causing his poor victim to groan under the pressure. “I missed you and so did Hao and Mingyu and Jihoon and– Oh! And (Y/n) missed you the moist–” he hiccuped while you tried your hardest to hide behind Mingyu, “most!”

You were going to be sick from nervousness and it only got worse when Junhui’s eyes immediately began searching for something – someone – in the crowds upon hearing your name.

His gaze caught yours before you could hide away properly. Your breath caught in your throat and your heart stopped for a moment before fluttering at the speed of a hummingbird’s wings. He offered you a smile.

Before you could find the strength to return the gesture, he was pulled away by Seungkwan. As they disappeared into the kitchen, you finally found your breath again.

“You should talk to him,” Mingyu told you but he didn’t sound as playful as he usually did when he told you things like this. He sounded almost… Sad? Disappointed? Mournful, perhaps? The smile he put on hardly looked genuine. “I bet he’s missed you as much as you missed him, you know?”

“I–” you gasped and the room seemed to be spinning as reality slowly set in, “I’m going to go get some fresh air.”

“Here,” he sighed and shrugged off his blazer, “at least put this on. I don’t want you catching a cold before New Year’s.”

You thanked him, shrugged on the blazer and headed out to the balcony. The chill of the air was a welcoming change – it lulled the butterflies back to sleep, just like you preferred them. 

He was really here, in the same building, breathing the same air, and he was as handsome as always – if not even more. The years had been kind to him and you didn’t doubt he must have a wife by now.  She was probably pretty and kind and a little aloof like he was – the perfect pair, his ideal other half like you never could be.

And you? You were alone still, holding onto a silly little hope that he’d still love you as much as he told you he did when you had a breakdown in the middle of your last finals’ season. To the moon and back and all around the world, as bright as the stars in the sky – that’s how he had described his feelings for you and you doubt he even remembered. 

The door creaked open and you tense up in anticipation of what was about to come. You didn’t dare turn to see who it was – perhaps it was Mingyu urging you to come back inside, or maybe Soonyoung coming to beg you to join him in karaoke, or maybe–

“I figured I’d find you here,” you heard him speak and your whole world shook. Junhui shuffled to stand next to you, leaning against the railing to look out at the city. “It was a little loud inside, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you agreed quietly but really it had been your own heart that had been so loud.

He chuckled. “I had forgotten how loud the guys were. I missed them though.” 

You nodded, unable to form sentences now that he was so close. You were staring at your hands – just a few centimetres and you could hold hands with him again. 

“I missed you,” you then heard him breathe out and the butterflies came to life again. “I missed you so much, every day. I guess it’s true what they say: you never forget your first.”

“But you can always move on,” you replied solemnly.

He hummed. “Have you? Moved on?” He seemed to regret the question as soon as he said it.  He cleared his throat. “I mean, I’m sure you did. Mingyu seems nice. He always did like you.”

Your heart dropped in shock. “Mingyu?”

“You’re wearing his jacket right now,” he laughed wistfully. “I always figured if it wouldn’t be me, it would be Gyu.”

“Oh!” You rushed to correct him now that you knew what he meant. “No, no, Mingyu and I– We aren’t– We never– I never. I haven’t moved on.”

“Really?” He seemed genuinely surprised. “You haven’t?”

“Well,” you started with a gulp of air, “I tried, but… no one compared.”

“Me too,” he breathed out and you saw that sparkle in his eyes you had missed so much. “There was no one like you, so I just waited… and waited…”

“Waited for what?”

“I don’t know,” he whispered and he seemed to be closer to you all of a sudden, your noses brushing together, “but I’m done waiting.”

You didn’t need to ask him what he meant by that, nor did you have the time to. He leaned closer and closer until you felt his lips against yours. Your fingers rose to play with the hair at the nape of his neck as his arms lowered to pull you closer to his chest. You faintly noticed your – Mingyu’s – blazer falling off your shoulders as Junhui embraced you closer, and closer, and closer, until you could feel the familiar fluttering of his heart against yours.

You expected it to feel foreign – years had passed, after all – but instead, it was as if he never even left. As if he had been here with you all those years, holding your hand and laughing at your dumb jokes while fighting off Soonyoung’s attempts at playful flirtation. 

As if there was only him and you in the world and that was all you would ever need.

“I missed this,” he all but gasped out once you pulled apart again. “I missed you.”

“I can’t believe you left me here to suffer alone for all those years,” you told him with a disbelieving laugh, “and then you come back and kiss me dumb?`”

A smirk on his lips, he shrugged. “But you’re not complaining, are you?”

“Only on one condition.”

“Anything,” he whispered and pecked your lips once more as if to seal his promise.

You believed him. “Stay. Here. With me.”

“With you? Forever.”

You had spoken in a daze of hopeful delusion but here he was, replying as if it was the only truth he knew. Your eyes widened. “What about your life back home?”

“My home is where you are,” he confessed with a small smile. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realise.”

[sophiamarieispinkbunny-chan]

SXF Novelization Fave Parts and some Analysis because I love Analyzing (Overthinking) Mission 1

I finally got my Spy x Family Family Portrait Novel and immediately finished reading it in one day, so without further ado, here are my fave parts, lines, dialogues from the first mission which is centered around Anya and Damian and this chapter just gives me diabetes 😭 (I've been shipping Damianya, yes but all this time it was like an innocent ship and it's not like making me feel butterflies since of course they're just children, but here in the novel, I actually got butterflies in my stomach, they're just so cute and precious here ❤️)

MISSION 1- THE EDEN ACADEMY NATURE CAMPING

-Yor thinking she needs to teach Anya a lot of survival things about camping because she's worried if she can handle the woods (Yor is such a great mom, worrying for Anya's safety always and I think this just shows her experience regarding the wilderness revealing that her hometown might've been near the woods and she did experiencing hunting for food when she was young)

-Loid hoping that the trip could bring Anya and Damian closer (Be careful what you wish you for Loid 😂)

"Wonderful! That's my girl. You can do it, Anya," Loid said.

I just love it when Loid calls Anya his girl, for she will always and forever be his little girl.

-Loid and Yor sort of having a gentle argument on who should get Bond's milk 😂

Loid: I'll get you some milk Bond

Yor: No, let me do that for you.

Loid: No, I can do it, just sit there and relax

Yor: You're the one who should relax

They ended up getting the milk together. These two idiots. 😭❤️

They remind of that, you hang up first, no you hang up first couple exchanges when they're on the phone. These two are so good in this married couple thing without even trying.

And then stabbed me in angst in the next paragraph.

Ever since escaping from the facility, Anya had bounce between orphanages and foster homes. But now she'd finally found someplace worth treasuring, and if she could bring about world peace, then they'd all be able to keep happily living here together.

She clearly doesn't know about Twilight's plan to leave them after achieving his mission. I wonder how she would react to that. I've written a fanfic about it so if you can check it out if you're interested😊. Sorry for the shameless fic plug.

But I hope that after the success of Strix, Loid would stay with them. Could he really leave them? Can he really do that? He can't even let Anya go during the first week they've been together and he has the choice to just ditch her, choose another child and it was the practical and safe thing for a spy for him to do when Edgar knew about his location. But he saved her and took her in despite his reservations about endangering her and all. Now could he let this little girl go after all this time?

-Anya reading Damian's mind and seeing his thoughts about him drowning when he, Emile and Ewen went camping with Mr. Green, made fun of him and even acted out his lines when he thought that he was really drowning in that shallow lake (She loves trolling Damian that she forgot that doing that could give her off as a telepath😂)

"Lovey-dovey couples are nice, but there's something extra special about bickering, will-they-won't-they romances."

I gotta agree with Becky on this one. Bickering makes any romance stories a thousand times more investing and entertaining to read. That's why academic rivals to lovers is an s-tier trope for me.

-Becky partnering Anya with Damian to fetch some water. Becky is also a fan of forced proximity trope, I see.

-Anya's telepathy elicited a sensation on Damian and it said that it wasn't the first time. I really bet that Damian would be the first to know about Anya's mind ability.

-Anya being confused about her left and right hand 😂 (I mean kids her age really do get confused about that, I don't blame her)

-Damian being gentle in his way of speaking whenever he sees Anya distressed or in tears. I'll never get tired of Damian being soft to Anya, he's really a sweet kid.

"Hey, keep it together!" commanded Damian as Anya started to sob again. He grabbed her arm and squeezed it tightly, pulling her close to speak in her ear (because the rain is loud). "I saw a small cave a ways back. Let's head there."

I don't know why but this scene, because of the way it was written, gave me butterflies.

-Anya calling for her Papa to save her when she was so scared. Loid said that Yor was the one that makes Anya feels safe, but she wasn't the only one whom Anya considers to be her safe place. He was also his baby's safe place and she trusts that Papa will always be there to save her.

-My favorite moment: Damian holding her hand and comforting her so she won't be scared, even though he, himself, is terrified too. Ugh, if that wasn't love, I don't what is. And when Anya gripped his hand back to comfort him too, he stopped shaking and Anya thought that his hand was warm. Awww, so preciouss❤️😭

-Anya letting herself to get the blame and willing to be punished but Damian not letting Anya to get the blame for them being lost in the forest. These two are like mini Yor and Loid haha, just young, energetic and extroverted versions of the two 🤣

-Anya being ashamed to face her Papa, because she thought her Operation to get close to Damian failed (since after that incident Damian went back to his mean self again but of course she didn't know Damian's crush on her just get massively deeper after that) but Loid wasn't even worried about that at all, nor did her ask her about Damian when she came home. When he had noticed she was sad, he immediately asked if she didn't have fun at their camping event. And when Anya said that she did, he smiled and said that he was glad that she did, because it's his daughter's happiness that's important to him (Because if she's happy then it would be good for my mission, I can imagine Loid telling this to himself when he just genuinely wanted her to be happy and enjoy her time at school since he never had the chance to do that as a kid)

-Yor and Loid preparing food together for Anya's return. Loid telling Anya that the food was safe to consume when she saw her face that is prepared to face death because he helped Yor to prepare. It was peak father-daughter moment 😂 But he let Yor cooked her specialty dish Southern Stew all by herself since she's the one who can make it the best ❤️

I wonder if Anya told him about her and Damian getting lost in the forest and Damian held her hand to comfort her. I wanna see Loid's reaction to that 😂

So that's it for Mission 1. Up next would be the chapter that got me laughing the most, Mission 2, Yuri babysitting Anya

[yandere-kokeshi]

Yandere Obanai Iguro Headcanons

Warnings: Yandere behavior, spoilers for his mask, punishments, and stalking; lmk if I missed anything.

Authors note: Obanai is one of my favorite characters so this may be a bit longer; I also do not own this character!

Rarely, does anyone he encounters or secretly watches is worthy of his time; yet… you, the most prized, kind, and the lovely person he’s ever seen, wrapped his heart in tight strings, making him fall for you. Getting his attention is quite a hard thing to do, but once he realized the feeling of butterflies hitting everywhere in his stomach, making him sweat profusely and act ‘awkward’ around you; almost acting like a different person.

At first, Obanai will try his best to avoid you or rather not let you see him. Not because he hates you or dislikes the emotions that are coming forward, but rather because he believes that he might not be the best decision for you; his clan following him like a trail of blood with an eminence feeling of guilt. He’s rather insecure about his past, including his wide mouth that he rarely shows. He fears you’ll hate him, causing him to make sure you see him as ‘normal’ and ‘human-like’.

Of course, this shows that he’ll be stalking you like no other, watching you from afar in awe, a small smile projecting on his face under the mask. Much like the other Hahsira’s, he will try to find out everything about you: likes, dislikes, pet peeves, and many things that’ll make you happy. Once he does find out, Obanai is leaving small gifts on your doorstep, hoping you’ll like the clothing, hand-written notes, and flowers he left for you.

If you decide to have a crush on someone, or someone has the urge to pursue a relationship with you (romantically), they are immediately taken down by Obanai. Either, he would try to find information that they wouldn’t want anyone to know, blackmail them to never be around you or, threaten them and belittle them to the point they’re scared to be even around you.

This also goes along the same line of your loved ones, not that he enjoys seeing you happy and content with your loved ones, he just has high paranoia about anyone that’s around you. He believes that they’ll take you away from him, possibly stealing you away forever and completely forgetting about him; in which, he fears highly. In this case, if he sees you getting hurt (verbally, emotionally, or physically), they are getting hurt and killed in the most gruesome way.

Most likely, the way you caught Obanai’s attention was the fact that you were a strong Hashira; you had a kind, caring, and gentle personality that drew his attention. You treated him like a human being, something that he wasn’t used to. You always tried to talk to him, in which he'd always blow you off: “Leave me alone, you’re annoying.”

Yet, you continuously approached him, even when he spewed out threats that would hurt people and lead them to tears. But, now, since you’ve caught the eye of a snake, he becomes extremely protective of you, even if you’re a Hashira.

Obanai knows you aren’t weak, you’re a Hashira for damn sake; but the moment he starts to realize he loves you, your privilege as a Slayer is quickly stripped away. Either, he would come up with an excuse to Oyakata-sama about needing you to stay home; resulting in you ‘retiring’. Or, force you to quit by guilt-tripping and manipulating you.

Even though Obanai is very possessive of you, he wouldn’t kidnap you unless you were hurt very badly. Whether that’s you tripping and breaking a leg, someone assaulting you or almost getting eaten by a demon: Obanai would only take severe precaution if needed. He knows what it’s like to be caged inside a box, which he doesn’t wish upon you at all. But, he will manipulate you to keep you home as much as possible, using the excuse: “I can save you if any problems come forth. You have everything you want here, right? So why not stay to keep yourself tight, I’m only doing this to protect you. I love you, you’re safer here.”

Though, if you were to get hurt and end up in the Butterfly Estate with multiple injuries, Obanai is sitting right next to you, holding your hand, planning a way to get you ‘home’. Once you’re awake, he’s right beside you, ordering you to never scare him like that again: “Since you were hurt badly, Master has made it clear you’re retired. You’re not leaving without me anymore, it’s final.”

Back on the track of manipulating, he would order you around to stay by him at all times. This includes ‘accidentally’ slipping into a relationship with him and moving in with him; controlling you from the moment you step foot in your now-shared home.

Obanai’s yandere tendencies consist of being very overprotective, paranoid, semi-worshiping, and possessive. He’s always watching over you, paranoia covering his thick skin as if someone will come into the home and steal you away. Rarely does he allow you to leave the house, at least without him that is.

From his experience, he knows you need sunlight to function. He would allow you to come out, shop, and eat out at your favorite restaurants as long as he’s alongside you. Of course, anyone who dares to eye you is immediately stared down by him.

His biggest problem is his insecurity, fearing that you’ll abandon him and betray him like everyone else. This makes the affection between the two of you (at times) very confusing, he will believe he’s not good for you, pushing you away to the point of desperation of physical contact. Then, other times, he wants a cuddle session the moment he comes home, bringing you in a tight embrace whilst he smells your hair.

Because of his insecurity of his body and face, he would never ever drop off his mask around you, scared you’ll run away once you see it. But, when it comes to a year within the relationship, he’ll allow you to pull it down, unexpected by the gentle kisses plastered on his face given by you; it may lead him to tears.

The punishments you’ll receive are pretty slim in advance; he hates hurting you in any way. Normally, if you decide to act out, he would either ignore you or lecture you to the point you’ll feel bad.

Throw insults towards him? He’ll bluntly ignore it. He’s heard those before, it doesn’t affect him as much as it did when he was younger; go ahead, he’s heard worse.

If you decide to try to break out or try to hit him? He would be annoyed and hurt. Of course, he would snap at you… yelling at you as to why ‘are you stupid?’ or ‘try that again and see what happens next.’

However, the most he would do to ‘hurt you’ is when you escape; bruising your wrists. Either after he finds you stumbled into the dirt outside or he catches you before you make it out into the woods, Obanai is yelling at you and dragging you back to your shared-room. You’d have a few scratches from trying to get away and the now reddish-bruise forming on your wrists from him dragging you inside.

You will be spoiled with everything you want if you act good. You want jewelry? You have a basket full of it, plus that haori you wanted. You love to read? You get as many books as you want, letting you admire the book cover as he blushes at your happy face. Whatever you want, is yours; all he asks in favor is you allow him to cuddle you, get many kisses and hugs from the desperate snake Hashira.

—

Masterlist || Please consider reblogging and commenting instead of liking, stay well!

Do not plagiarize, repost, modify, translate or copy my work.

[lewmagoo]

silent falls the winter snow | rhett abbott

description: in which a cowboy's kind and tender heart nearly costs him his life

warnings: 18+, allusion to smut, mentions of trying to get pregnant/pregnancy, near death experience, physical injury (no blood), talk of doctors/hospitals, brief discussion of miscarriage, angst

pairing: rhett abbott x f!reader

notes: this story has been a long time coming. i wanted to do something for the christmas season with rhett, and this was what came of it. it's quite long, so get all cozied up under a blanket, maybe with a cup of hot cocoa to accompany you, and enjoy! merry christmas to all

The morning of Christmas Eve started out as any holiday morning might in your household.

You had nowhere to be that morning, so there was no rush to clamber out of bed and get ready for the day. Instead, you nestled further into the warmth that your flannel sheets and multiple layers of blankets provided, along with the heat radiating off of your husband, who lay beside you, still sound asleep.

In those first few moments of waking, you couldn’t help but smile to yourself as you pressed yourself further into Rhett’s chest. You loved the peace that mornings like this brought. You often found yourself overwhelmed with gratitude at the fact that you were both safe and sound, cozy in your bed, within the walls of the home that you’d built together. 

And then you’d feel him stir beside you, his arm tightening around you as he succumbed to consciousness, and your smile would grow even bigger still. You knew that this was right where you were meant to be. Wrapped in the arms of the man you loved. 

But this morning was different. Not because of the holiday, but because of something else. And it came in the form of a tiny life growing within you. A secret that Rhett was not yet privy to. 

You were waiting for the perfect moment to tell him, and you’d decided that Christmas morning was the best opportunity to do so. However, that meant you had to wait another full day before revealing the news to him. You weren’t sure if you could contain your excitement that long. 

You’d been talking about starting a family for a while. And while you hadn’t necessarily been actively trying for a baby, you hadn’t been trying to prevent such a thing, either. 

The rush of emotions that flooded you when you’d stared down at those two lines on the test you took was overwhelming. You’d taken a few, just to be sure. All of them were positive, and your eyes welled with happy tears. Your first thought was to tell your husband immediately, because you told each other everything. But it needed to be special, because Rhett cared about things like that. He’d never admit it to anyone but you, but he was the sentimental type, and appreciated special gestures. 

Presenting the news of your pregnancy in a neatly wrapped gift box was exactly the type of thing he would love. And you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was going to cry, because he was a complete softie when it came to you. Adding a baby into the mix would only soften him up even more so. 

But you still had a full day before you revealed the news to him. So you decided to enjoy the peaceful morning and relish in it being just the two of you for a little longer. 

“Mm,” you heard Rhett hum beside you, voice gravelly with sleep. “Mornin’, sweet thing.”

You smiled, watching as his eyes fluttered open, revealing brilliant blue. “Mornin’, handsome man. Merry Christmas Eve.”

He nuzzled into you, the scruff of his stubble scratching against the sensitive skin of your neck, causing you to shudder. “Merry Christmas Eve.” His mouth trailed kisses over where his stubble had scraped, soothing the burn. 

“Don’t wanna get out of this bed,” you sighed, “s’too warm.”

His arm tightened around your middle, his hand resting against your abdomen, and felt the flutter of butterflies there, knowing what rested inside, just beneath his touch. The product of your love. 

“It is nice ‘n warm, ain’t it? I wouldn’t be opposed to hanging out here with you all day. But then again, those animals aren’t gonna feed themselves, are they?” he spoke, referring to your horses, chickens, and select few barn cats. 

Rhett took the job of caring for the animals very seriously. He loved all of them in his own way, and it was very important to him that they were looked after. His gentleness with the creatures always warmed your heart. Especially when you watched him interact with his horse, June. 

He’d had her since he was seventeen years old. She was a stubborn mare who only let three people close to her. Rhett, of course, Amy, his niece, and you, his wife. June seemed to hate everyone else, and refused to let them near her. 

This distrust stemmed from years of mistreatment from her previous owners. Rhett had rescued her and spent countless hours gaining her trust. You remembered it well. You would come over to the Abbott ranch after school each day, when you and Rhett were both still in high school, and watch him work with her. 

He’d poured his blood, sweat, and tears into that horse, and it eventually paid off. Now, years later, the two were inseparable. Their bond was something to behold, and you never tired of watching them communicate with one another. 

“You’re right,” you sighed in response to his statement. “June will probably be mad at you if you’re late with her breakfast.” 

Rhett smiled in amusement. “You know she will be. Stampin’ her hoof and everything.” Even so, he snuggled further against you. “But I suppose I could stay here a few minutes longer. I like not having anywhere to be for a change.”

“Me too,” you happily agreed. 

Rhett’s fingers drew circles against your skin, and you melted into him. You were putty in his hands just from a simple touch, and he knew it. When his lips began trailing kisses along your neck, you were a goner. 

“If you don’t stop, we’ll never leave this bed,” you breathlessly spoke.

You felt his mouth quirk into a smile, and his large, warm hand wandered lower, brushing beneath the band of your pajama pants. “Doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” he murmured.

But the bastard was set on teasing you. His fingers brushed just above where you needed him most, all while his mouth was at your neck, teeth grazing over soft skin, soothed by his tongue. Just as you were allowing yourself to bask in his touch, his hand was gone from between your legs.

You whined in protest, bleary eyes fluttering open to look at him. There was a stupid smirk on his handsome face. “Sorry darlin’, that was just a preview. You’ll get the rest tonight.”

You groaned, rolling your eyes. “Rhett!” You scolded.

“What? I ain’t makin’ love to you until tonight. You’re gonna have to be patient.” He still had a smile on his face. He knew exactly what he was doing, teasing you like that. 

Maybe it was silly, but the two of you had a tradition. On Christmas Eve, before the clock struck midnight, you would make love by the light of the Christmas tree in your living room, and fall asleep beside the flickering fireplace, wrapped in each other’s arms under warm blankets. It was something you’d done ever since you were first married, and though it might have seemed inconsequential to anyone else, it was special to you both.

Rhett liked to tease you leading up to it. Little touches here and there that he knew drove you crazy. Subtle foreplay that lasted throughout the day, so that when the evening finally rolled around, you were so needy for him you’d hardly be able to think straight. 

Which was exactly what he’d just done, and he seemed perfectly smug about it too. 

He kissed your pout off your face and said, “I promise I’ll make it up to ya tonight. Until then, I got hungry animals to feed.”

You watched as he slipped out of your warm bed, and the view you were met with was not one you could complain about. He’d foregone a shirt the night before, even in the dead of winter, which allowed you to admire his naked torso as he moved to grab his clothes.

You watched as the muscles in his back rippled, and you were certain you’d start drooling at any moment. Rhett was not bulky by any means. He was well-defined from years of physical labor and bull riding, and it only further reminded you just how strong he was. 

“I can feel you starin’,” he said as he pulled on his first layer of long underwear, followed by jeans. 

“I’m admiring my husband.”

“Oh really?” You didn’t miss the pink flush that warmed his cheeks. Compliments always did make him bashful.

“Yes. You’re too handsome for your own good.”

He shook his head, leaning over the bed to kiss you. “Whatever you say, sugar.” Then he righted himself, grabbing his flannel. 

“I’ll get breakfast started, that way you can sit down for a warm meal when you come back inside,” you told him, watching his skilled hands button each button on his shirt.

He smiled. “Always take such good care of me.” 

Even still, your eyes followed him as he stepped over to the window, and you sat up when he let out a low whistle. “Guess it snowed last night,” he mused.

Reluctantly, you got out of your warm bed and padded over to the window. You were met with the sight of a winter wonderland. It had snowed a lot overnight, and flakes were still falling silently from the sky.

“Wow. The roads are probably a disaster,” you echoed, leaning back against him as he slung an arm around you. 

“I’d say you’re right. I wonder if we’ll be able to get to Ma’s tomorrow.”

“You know she’ll be so upset if we don’t make it for Christmas dinner.”

“She sure will. But you know her, she’ll also fret about us stayin’ safe and tell us to lay low until the roads are clear.”

“Guess we’ll play it by ear and see what the weather holds,” you murmured in response. Yet again, Rhett pressed a kiss to your head before he nodded in response.

He left you alone in your bedroom, and you remained by the window for a few moments longer, admiring the snowfall. When you checked your phone promptly after, you noticed a weather alert at the top of the screen, indicating that a winter storm was approaching, and would likely carry over into Christmas day, adding to the already large amount of snow surrounding your home outside. 

“There goes Christmas dinner,” you muttered. You’d been looking forward to dinner at the Abbott’s. Though their family dynamic had been strained when you and Rhett were first married, things had greatly improved since then, and Christmastime was a very enjoyable season to spend with them.

According to Rhett, it hadn’t always been that way. Growing up, Christmas had never been his favorite time of year. Cecelia tried to make it special, and to her credit, she did succeed in some ways. They never had much money, so gifts were small, and Rhett could always sense the stress the holiday season put on his parents.

From a young age, he’d determined that his own children’s Christmases would be much different from his own. He would give them everything he couldn’t have, and then some. And he would be more emotionally present than his father ever was. 

Royal had always seen to it that his family was provided for. He had a good work ethic and Rhett had always admired that about him. But he never allowed an emotional connection to form between him and his sons. 

This was part of why Rhett had always struggled to express his own feelings and emotions. In the beginning of your relationship, it had been quite an issue. But you’d helped him greatly in overcoming that hurdle. And while he still had a hard time communicating on occasion, he actively tried to be better about it for you. 

That was one of the things he loved about you. Your ability to take his hand and push him to be a better man. And along with that, his distaste for Christmas had long since gone away. You had breathed new life into the season for him, setting everything alight with a magic that only you could bring. 

Now, he would freely admit that Christmas was his absolute favorite time of year, all thanks to you, the light of his life. 

But little did he know that Christmas was soon going to take on a brand new meaning for him, thanks to the little babe currently residing in your belly. Oh, you were so excited for him to finally hear the news. 

With that thought in mind, you smiled to yourself, and finally moved to grab your robe, slipping into its fleece warmth before you shoved your feet into your slippers, and made your way out of your bedroom and down to the kitchen, where you set about preparing breakfast. 

As you worked, you hummed Christmas carols, allowing your mind to be completely occupied with the work at hand. You were so engrossed in your breakfast making that you hardly heard Rhett come back inside. 

“Smells good,” he spoke up, as he surprised you by wrapping his arms around your middle. He nuzzled against your neck, and his cold nose sent a shiver through you. 

“Babe!” You scolded, and he laughed. 

“What? I gotta warm my nose up somehow,” he replied. 

“Preferably not on my neck,” you shot back, though a smile played at your lips. You turned, leaning in to kiss him. “Breakfast is almost ready. How about you put on a record for us to listen to?”

As he sauntered over to the table that held your record player, you knew which record he was going to choose before he even rifled through the collection. Sure enough, just as you’d expected, a few moments later the sounds of Buck Owens’ Christmas album filled the air, beginning with the all too familiar tune to Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy. 

It was Rhett’s favorite holiday album, because he’d grown up listening to it. You weren’t initially a fan, but you saw how much joy it brought him, so it had quickly become your favorite holiday album, too. Now it was a tradition to listen to it every year. 

As you set everything out on the table, he focused on getting a fire started in the living room fireplace. He tossed in a few logs, ones he’d spent hours chopping for the long winter. Your man certainly had a habit of working himself to the bone. 

Before he joined you in the kitchen, he turned the Christmas tree lights on, providing a nice sort of ambiance to accompany your breakfast. Then he stepped over and took a plate full of pancakes from your hands and set it atop the large oak table that he’d made with his own hands.

While you finished setting food out, he took the liberty of putting on a pot of coffee, grabbing your favorite matching Christmas mugs from the cabinet. Before long, you were seated at the table, coffee in hand and breakfast spread out before you. 

You started out in your own seat, but it wasn’t long before you found yourself in your husband’s lap, snuggled into his warmth as you shared your food. His free hand rested absently over your belly again, and part of you wondered if he actually knew you were expecting, or if he’d only placed his hand there out of instinct. 

Your heart quickened in your chest as you momentarily considered telling him right then and there. But the thought was fleeting, and you brushed it off as soon as it entered your mind. You needed it to be special. Blurting it out at the breakfast table hardly seemed special enough. 

But Rhett noticed your shift in demeanor. “You alright, darlin’? Your heart’s racin’.”

It was? You’d hardly realized. “Just thinking about how much I love you,” you responded. Cheesy, maybe. But it was what came to your mind in the moment. 

He hummed, tightening his hold on you and kissing the back of your neck. “I love you too. More than anything.”

You turned in his arms, leaning in close to bump your nose against his before you kissed him. He tasted like syrup and coffee, and it made you smile against his mouth. 

When you parted, you let your head rest against his chest, and Rhett hummed, a deep rumble that vibrated through your entire being. 

“Storm’s brewing,” he murmured after a few moments of silence. “Probably won’t be getting into town anytime soon.”

“Good thing we planned ahead,” you replied. You’d spent the last few weeks preparing your little homestead for the upcoming winter. You had plenty of food stocked, for yourselves and for your animals. There was enough firewood to last you for a good long while. If you were to be snowed in, you’d be safe, sound, and well-fed, at least.

“I wouldn’t mind being snowed in with you,” Rhett mused, his mouth quirking into a smile as he squeezed your thigh. 

“As long as it doesn’t keep you cooped up for too long. You go kinda stir-crazy when you don’t have anything to do,” you teased. That was your husband, after all. Always working, always needing his hands to be busy. He hated being idle.

“Oh, I could think of a few things we could do,” he continued, hand sliding further up your thigh. 

You lightly slapped at his hand, though it was good-natured. “Of course that’s where your mind would go, ya dirty cowboy.” 

“Can’t help it. You make my mind go to those places.” Again, his scruff dragged against your warm skin, causing you to shudder in his arms. The familiar warmth of desire flickered between your thighs, and you surged forward, hands gripping the collar of his henley, mouth seeking out his own.

He grunted in surprise at your sudden movement, but he soon melted into you, lips moving with yours. When you parted, he rested his forehead against yours, baby blues drifting shut. “If I don’t get up right now, I’ll end up bendin’ you over this table and taking you right here in the kitchen.”

His words, low and gravelly, ignited the growing spark that had already been burning within you. “What’s stopping you, then?”

“I ain’t fucking you until I can get you in front of the fireplace tonight and do it proper. S’much as I’d like to fuck you right now, it won’t be special, and I really like having our tradition of makin’ love by the Christmas tree.”

Rhett held your shared traditions near and dear to his heart. Even something as simple as making love. He wanted to honor the traditions you’d built together over the course of your relationship, and he’d be damned if he let any of them fall by the wayside. 

You smiled at him, reaching a hand up to brush his brunette locks away from his face. “How’d I get lucky enough to score a man like you, Rhett Abbott?”

His cheeks warmed pink at your statement. “Don’t get all sappy on me now, baby doll.”

You kissed his nose. “Can’t help it,” you replied, echoing his words from just a moment prior.

You sat there for a few more minutes, enjoying one another’s company. But all too soon, it was time to continue with the day. There was much to be done before the dawn of Christmas day. While Rhett went about making sure the property was in order for the upcoming storm, you tidied up the kitchen and headed upstairs to ready yourself for the day.

By the time you came back downstairs, Rhett was back inside, removing all the layers he’d put on to stay warm. “It’s so fuckin’ cold out there,” he announced. “And the wind’s picking up. Nearly froze my face off.”

You sauntered over, planting a kiss on his lips. “That’ll warm you up,” you teased. 

He nodded, smiling cheekily as his hands rested on your hips. “My ma called while I was outside. Gonna call her back now, figured she’d wanna talk to us both.”

That was how you spent the remainder of your morning, talking to Cecelia on the phone. Of course, she insisted that the two of you stay home, because there was no sense in risking it with a blizzard on the forecast. She suggested you all celebrate Christmas together at a later date, once the weather had cleared, and you and Rhett happily agreed. Though it was slightly bittersweet to not be able to spend time with everyone, you were happy to get to enjoy a quiet, intimate holiday with your husband and no one else. 

After you bid goodbye to Cece, you went about your final Christmas preparations while Rhett took the time to shower upstairs. You’d already placed a few gifts around the tree, and you added more to the bunch. 

You couldn’t quell the butterflies that fluttered to life within you as you picked up a small, neatly wrapped box with Rhett’s name on it. Inside, there was a positive pregnancy test and a tiny knitted cowboy hat. You’d had the present packaged up for weeks now, so eager to put it under the tree and see your husband open it on Christmas morning. Oh, the joy that would fill his face. You couldn’t wait.

Shaking yourself out of your reverie, you continued setting everything up. You filled Rhett’s stocking, you finished putting out the gifts, and finally, you were finished. The living room looked like a Christmas wonderland, and it brought a wistful smile to your face. 

Soon after, you turned over the record that had long since stopped playing, and once again, Buck Owens’s voice filled the room with his twangy Christmas tunes. And that was how the rest of the day continued. 

You enjoyed a cozy Christmas Eve day, preparing a quick lunch for you and Rhett, enjoying quality time together, and soaking up every moment you could. It was your last Christmas with just the two of you, of course, so you wanted to make it special.

However, little did you know that it all was going to come to a screeching halt very soon.

You remained blissfully unaware of what was to come, however. The snow had begun to fall outside, blanketing everything in stark, glimmering white. But it wasn’t a peaceful, romantic snowfall. It went from moderate to severe within mere hours, and by the time dinnertime rolled around, it was a complete whiteout outside.

“Guess they weren’t kidding when they said it’d be a blizzard,” Rhett observed as he gazed out the window while helping you prepare dinner. You’d tasked him with chopping everything since it was your least favorite part of prep work.

“Good thing we have nowhere to be,” you chimed in, glad for a warm house to cozy up in. Although the winds howled outside, and the snow fell in blankets, you were safe inside the home you’d built together. 

Rhett had put his blood, sweat, and tears into building this house from the ground up, and you’d come alongside him, helping build the home you’d always dreamed of. But in reality, it was just a building. Home wasn’t four walls and some windows. It was his warmth enveloping you, his touch grounding you, his presence calming you. For you, home was Rhett Abbott.

“Looking forward to having a nice, quiet Christmas with just the two of us,” he continued on as set the cutting board and knife in the sink. 

“Me too,” you agreed, “I love your family, but I also love having you all to myself.”

Rhett hummed, stepping closer to slip his arms around your middle, face nuzzling against your neck as you stirred the pot of soup on the stove. “Me too. An’ I can’t wait to make a family of our own to carry on Christmas traditions with.”

Your heart quickened within your chest at his words. It fluttered even more so when his large, warm hands splayed over your abdomen. “Can’t wait to see you all round with my babies.”

There it was again, that familiar spark of desire within you. But as his palms rested on your belly, you found yourself turning in his arms, looking into his eyes. Cerulean stared back at you, so bright and full of love. You opened your mouth, fueled by the spur of the moment. 

“Rhett, I–” You started, nearly blurting out the news you’d been withholding for so long. But you never got to finish your sentence, because suddenly, the lights flickered, and all at once the power went out. 

Rhett pulled back, pausing for a moment. “Figured that was gonna happen,” he mused. 

Although your generator soon kicked on and restored the power, the spell you’d both been under was broken. He looked at you, mouth quirking into a smile. “Were you about to say somethin’, before the power interrupted us?”

But you shook your head. “It wasn’t important,” you said. That seemed to be enough for him.

When he stepped away to set the table, you leaned back against the counter and let out a breath. You couldn’t believe you’d almost spilled the beans. You were thankful that the power going out had provided a distraction, as if it was the universe slapping you upside the head for almost spoiling the surprise. 

You went back to finishing dinner, settling into a comfortable quiet, save for the Christmas music that played lowly in the background. However, the quiet was soon interrupted when Rhett glanced out the window and found that something was amiss.

“Shit, the barn door blew open,” he announced.

You joined him at the kitchen window, and sure enough, you could see the door blowing in the wind. 

“I’m gonna go close it. Otherwise, June’ll probably wander off into the storm and get herself lost,” he said, already starting for the door. He was right in worrying about the stubborn horse wandering away. She’d done so on a few other occasions, but it had always been during warmer months. Never during a storm like this. 

“Put a coat on!” You called after him, knowing he’d probably just throw on his Carhartt hoodie since he was just running out for a minute. But it was much to cold to go without a proper coat. 

“You sound like my ma!” He called over his shoulder, though there was mirth in his tone. He loved that you looked out for him in ways big and small. 

You shook your head and continued your work, focusing on getting dinner finished. A few minutes later, just as you were putting the food on the table, Rhett stumbled in from the cold, cheeks and nose bitten and blushed from the harsh winds. 

“June got out,” he said with a weary sigh. 

“Oh no,” you spoke up, concern washing over you. 

“I’ve gotta go find her.” He was already moving to put on more layers. 

“Rhett, it’s a whiteout out there. You won’t be able to see her,” you reasoned. Your stomach twisted at the thought of him going out into a storm like this. 

He looked at you, his face serious, and you knew there was no changing his mind. “I can’t just leave her out there. I won’t.”

You knew it, too. He loved that horse, and would never forgive himself if something happened to her. Besides, there was no changing his mind once it was already made up. He was stubborn like that. 

You let out a soft breath and nodded. “Alright. I’ll keep dinner warm for you.” You stepped into his space, placing your hands on his chest. “Please be careful.”

He hummed, lifting his own hands to place over yours. “I will. I’m sure she isn’t too far. I’ll just take the snowmobile.”

Nodding, you leaned in to kiss him. “Make sure you bundle up.” You didn’t want him freezing out there. 

Again, your lips met, and he soon slipped away to pull on his toboggan and gloves. You saw to it that he was wearing a scarf, to cover his ears from the cold and avoid the earache that was sure to come if he didn’t. 

He could see the worry creasing your brow, and he reached up, brushing his gloved hand over your cheek. “I’ll be back in no time. I promise.”

Never make promises you can’t keep. 

“Okay, I’ll be here waiting.”

And with that, he headed back out into the howling storm. You shivered at the residual air that had rushed in when he opened the door, but you made no move to leave the cold entryway. You stood at the door, watching him disappear into the winter wonderland. 

A few minutes later, he was headed out on the snowmobile, and you watched until you couldn’t see him anymore. You couldn’t shake the feeling of dread that had settled in your chest, as if someone had reached in and taken your heart in hand, squeezing just enough to apply an uncomfortable pressure. 

You decided to blame it on pregnancy hormones. Surely it had caused the logical part of your brain to go haywire. 

Instead of standing by the window wringing your hands, you decided to busy yourself by cleaning up the kitchen, putting a load of dishes in the washer, wiping down the table, cleaning off the stovetop. You placed the pot of soup back on the stove to keep warm until Rhett returned. 

By the time you were finished, thirty minutes had passed, and he still hadn’t returned. You told yourself to relax. It took a while to get across your property as it was. Add a snowstorm to the mix and it would take twice as long. 

You considered eating some soup to pass the time, but you didn’t want to have dinner without Rhett, so you decided against it. Besides, you weren’t even sure if your stomach could handle food at the moment. The bitter twinge of anxiety had sent it into knots.

Trying desperately to keep yourself occupied, you decided to go around and straighten up the house, even though there wasn’t much cleaning to be done. You tidied up the entryway, organizing shoes and coats, sweeping the hardwood floor, straightening the rug that had been knocked crooked. 

You turned up the record player so the music would fill the house and hopefully distract you from the incessant ticking of the large antique clock that sat on your mantle. You remembered the day Rhett brought it home, after your house had just been built. He was beaming from ear to ear, so proud of himself for scoring such a thing from an antique store a few towns over.

It was very ornate, and it really wasn’t your style of decor, but you hadn’t had the heart to tell him that, not after he was so eager to add to the decor in the home he’d built. So you let him place it on the mantle, and it had been there ever since. Funnily enough, that clock had become one of your most prized processions, because it reminded you of him, and his love for you.

But now, as you looked at the crafted wood, and watched the delicate hands tick by, it just made you feel sick to your stomach. Over an hour had gone by, and you could do nothing to quell the dread thrumming through you.

Your next solution was to head upstairs and clean the bathroom, hoping a laborious task like that would get your mind off the situation at hand. But an hour later, the bathroom was clean, and you were only more worried than you had been before.

You headed back downstairs, gazing out the front window, hoping to find that Rhett was returning. But all you were met with was vast miles of white, with your husband nowhere to be found.

The tremor that ran through you was powerful, and you had to reach forth to brace yourself against the wall. You just knew something terrible had happened.

And as it turned out, your intuition was correct.

Rhett had gone out into the east pasture, figuring June had wandered out there, because he’d found her there the last few times she’d gotten out. He followed the fence line, using it as a point of reference so he wouldn’t get himself lost. It was much too difficult to gather a sense of direction in the middle of blinding snow.

He drove by the light of the snowmobile, his eyes scanning his surroundings, hoping to catch sight of the dapple gray horse named June. After driving for a good while, he saw movement out of his peripheral, and he slowed, glancing over to see that something was in the woods, just on the other side of the fence. 

Sure enough, as he came to a stop, he found that part of the fence had fallen in, likely from the strong winds. He was willing to bet that June had gone over it and found herself in the woods. With a soft sigh, he shut off the engine, and climbed off of the snowmobile, grabbing the rope he’d attached to the back as he went.

He pulled a flashlight out of his pocket and used it to guide him to the tree line. Sure enough, the closer he stepped, he realized that it was indeed June that he’d seen. He stopped just between two trees, and he placed his hands on his hips as he looked at her. 

“What’re you doin’ out here, old girl?” He called out. June let out a whinny and stepped toward Rhett, clearly happy to see him. “Gave me a hell of a scare, you know that?”

He was flooded with relief, happy to see that she appeared safe and sound. He’d have to get her back to the barn to check for sure. He stepped through the trees, approaching the mare with an outstretched arm. 

But as he moved, he neglected to double-check his footing. The snow had covered everything, and it made the ground appear flat. But just beneath the blanket of white was a large root protruding from the earth. And what should occur but Rhett catching his boot on that branch and going down?

The fall wouldn’t have harmed him whatsoever. He would’ve been able to get back up just fine, with minimal injuries thanks to the padding of his clothes, and the fact that he was youthful and could bounce back from injuries quickly.

But as fate would have it, there was also a large rock covered in snow, and as he fell, he went backward. He hit his head on that very rock, hard enough to instantly steal all consciousness from him, leaving him alone and vulnerable in the middle of a blizzard, with no way of seeking help.

Indeed, you were right in thinking something was wrong. Because something was very wrong. 

Over two hours had passed and you were beside yourself with anxiety. It crawled through you like an icy chill, robbing you of all warmth, and settling in your chest uncomfortably. 

You considered calling Rhett’s father. Royal would know what to do. But you knew that you’d likely not be able to get a call out in this weather. Even if you did, there was no way he or Perry could get to you. Not in this storm. The Abbotts had a snowmobile of their own, but it was old, and hardly trustworthy enough to go long distances. Rhett had been meaning to get his parents a new one as a gift, but had never gotten around to it. 

That meant you were essentially up the creek without a paddle. You decided to try to call Rhett, even though you knew the call wouldn’t go through. There was hardly any signal out in the east field as it was. 

As expected, your phone didn’t even let you get to the dial tone. It remained silent as you held it to your ear. “Dammit,” you cursed, locking the device in irritation. 

You’d have to go out there and look for him. And as you gazed out into the night, your tummy twisted. You placed a hand over your abdomen, where your little one rested warm and safe. You knew you had to find your husband. If, God forbid, he died out there, you knew you would blame yourself for the rest of your life. Your child needed a father, and you were going to bring him home. 

But just as you moved to begin bundling up, you heard an all too familiar whinny just outside the house. Heart leaping in your chest, you rushed for the door, flinging it open. You were met with the sight of a restless June, but no sign of Rhett. And that’s when you knew for certain that something had happened. 

You stepped outside, reaching your hand out to place on June’s cool muzzle. “Where is he, girl? What happened?” You asked. 

She whinnied again, and you got the sense that she wanted you to follow her. So you rushed back inside, finished layering up, and grabbed the things you’d need, tossing them into a backpack. 

Then you hurried back outside, guiding June back to the barn. You knew what a risk it was to ride her in weather like this. It would be difficult for her to walk, and there was always the possibility of her misstepping and injuring herself. 

But you also knew how stubborn the mare was, much like her owner. If you tried to corral her into her stall, she wouldn’t take well to it. She’d throw a fit and refuse to budge. She was already giving you flack for dragging her back to the barn. It was clear that she was distressed, likely from whatever had happened to Rhett. 

“We’ll go get him, I promise,” you assured her, running your hand over her flank. She was your only hope of finding your husband. 

Quickly, you saddled her up, making sure to place a fleece quarter sheet on her back half to keep her warm when you ventured outside. 

Finally, you led June back out into the snow, and mounted her, pausing to turn on the large flashlight you’d grabbed from the house. “C’mon, girl. Show me where he is,” you told her, hoping and praying to whatever powers that be that she’d actually lead you to him. 

She went in the direction of the east pasture, and you made sure to keep her at a slow gait. The last thing you needed was for her to fall. Then you’d certainly be fucked. 

It took ages to get to the pasture. The entire time your heart was pounding in your chest, and many different scenarios were flashing through your mind. 

Had he been in an accident? If he had been, how badly was he hurt? Your head spun as you pictured him injured and bleeding in the snow. It sent a shock of terror through you, and tears stung your eyes. 

You chastised yourself for not coming after him sooner. Or insisting he stay in the house and wait for the storm to pass. But you never would’ve been able to convince him otherwise. His could never live with himself just let June remain outside in such weather. 

Damn Rhett Abbott and that tender heart of his. You shuddered to think that maybe this time, that heart had gotten him killed. 

“Please, let him be okay,” you whispered into the night. 

Around you, the wind moaned and howled. You felt like joining in with your own wails. Instead, you focused on keeping your breathing steady, and your horse on track. 

To calm yourself down, you took in your surroundings more thoroughly. The fence line beside you. The cold, delicate flakes landing on your cheeks, melting into your skin. 

It was a wonder, that even in a storm this violent, the snow made no sound as it fluttered through the air. It fell just as silently as if it were but a tame snowfall. 

However, what was happening around you was anything but tame. It was wild and unpredictable and it made you tremble with a fear you’d only felt once before. 

You remembered it like it was yesterday. The last bull ride Rhett had gone on. The one he’d told you would be his last, because he wanted to settle down and start a life with you. 

But the bull he was riding got the best of him, and managed to throw him to the ground like he weighed nothing. And when he hit the ground, he didn’t get back up. He remained there, entirely still. Too still. And when you saw them drag him out of the ring, your heart leaped out of your chest, because the way he looked, limp and lifeless, you thought for sure you’d lost him. 

It was the most terrifying moment of your entire life, and you lost yourself, succumbing to a wave of panic that rendered you unable to speak or move.

While everything had worked out in the end, and Rhett had merely been knocked unconscious and had sustained no other injuries, it still harrowed you to the bone, and you hoped you’d never experience such a thing again. 

But now here you were, enduring the same fear you’d felt the moment he fell from that bull. 

The length of time it took to get to him only worsened that mounting anxiety. You shook, both from the cold and from the fright. 

What if you found him, and he was dead? The thought made your stomach churn, and you thought you would be sick, but you managed to pull yourself together, trying to tell yourself to calm down and not jump to any conclusions. 

But how could you, when your worst fear was taking place before your very eyes?

You weren’t sure how long it took to get across that pasture, but after quite some time, you spotted a beacon of hope ahead. The parked snowmobile. 

But it did nothing to relieve you. It only worsened your worry, and you urged June ahead, still keeping her at a slow pace. All you wanted to do was push her into a gallop so you could get there faster, but it would only serve to make her stumble, and possibly injure you both. So you exercised as much self-control as you could. 

After what seemed like utter eternity, you finally reached the snowmobile. Quickly, you dismounted, stepping into the heavy snow and stumbling over to the vehicle, using your flashlight to guide you. 

A layer of snow sat atop it, indicating it had been parked there for a while. Your heart sank, and you cautiously glanced around, expecting to find the worst. 

Nearby, June let out a panicked neigh, and you whipped around, realizing she’d crossed over a broken part of the fence and had gone over to the tree line. 

Heart hammering within your chest, you leaped to your feet and fought your way through the snow. When you reached her, you looked ahead, and then you saw it. A glimpse of something dark, just between the trees. Shining your light, you could see that it appeared to be a body. 

You hardly processed your body kicking into action, dashing forward. Sure enough, when you got closer, you could see that it was indeed a body. 

You fell to your knees, reaching out and turning him over onto his back. It was Rhett. You’d found him.

“Oh my God,” you sobbed. He wasn’t moving. 

Quickly, you yanked your mitten off, reaching your hand into the collar of his coat to check for a pulse. Much to your relief, you found one, albeit slow. 

“Baby, can you hear me?” You called, touching your hands to his face. His skin was freezing, and you pulled your hands away with a gasp. 

You had to get him somewhere warmer, and fast. “I’ll be back, I promise,” you assured him, unsure if he could even hear you. 

You pushed yourself to stand, scrambling up the snow bank. Having no choice but to leave him, and June, you made the split-second decision to take the snowmobile back to the main part of your property. It would be much faster than riding on horseback. 

Fueled by adrenaline, you rushed toward the vehicle, stopping only to brush the layer of snow off the seat before you climbed on. Much to your relief, the engine started with ease. 

Without wasting another moment, you headed off toward home. All that mattered was getting back to Rhett. 

It was as if you couldn’t get back fast enough. Once you finally skidded to a halt outside the barn, you jumped to the ground, careening into the building. 

You searched frantically until your eyes fell upon the item you were looking for. A black cargo sled that was meant to be attached to the back of a snowmobile. You rushed forth and grabbed it, dragging it back outside. 

You yanked your mittens off to free your hands and allow you to attach the sled to the hitch. Once it was properly attached, you shoved your mittens back on and climbed onto the vehicle, turning over the engine and taking off back toward the east pasture. 

When you reached the spot you’d left Rhett, you were quick to jump back into the snow and stumble into the woods. Again, you found yourself at his side. He still appeared to be unconscious, but he was alive. 

“I’m here, baby. I’ve got you,” you told him. You hoped he could hear you, hoped he knew that help had come and that he wasn’t alone any longer. 

The thought of him alone out here like this sent tears burning in your eyes, but you shook them off. You couldn’t dwell on that now. You had to get him to safety first. 

Your dilemma was trying to get him over to the vehicle. He was dead weight, so it would not be an easy task, especially not with all this snow.

Bending low, you grabbed under his arms, hauling him up a little. But you fell backward almost immediately, jarring your whole body. 

“Dammit!” You cried out. 

A flash of panic went through you as you realized what all this stress could possibly do to you, and the babe inside you. But you had no choice but to press on. You were Rhett’s only hope of getting out of the cold and into the safe warmth of your home. 

So you stood back up and pulled him up again, fighting like hell to drag him back to the snowmobile. By some miracle, you made it, and soon, had managed to wrangle him into the sled. 

As you did so, you fell again, landing on your knees. You let out a loud sob, exhausted from fighting to get to this point. But you stood up again on unsteady legs and climbed onto the vehicle. 

You turned the engine, and it roared to life. As you pulled away, June began following you, which you were relieved for. It saved you the trouble of having to go back out and get her later, taking precious time away from helping your husband. 

Another eternity seemed to drag on at an excruciatingly slow rate as you drove through the storm. The entire time you silently prayed that he would be okay. You needed him to be okay. 

Sometime later, you made it back to the barn. Quick as you could, you jumped off the vehicle and rounded June back into her stall, tying her lead to the post and making sure to secure her door so she wouldn’t get out again. You’d have to come back out and remove her saddle later on. For now, Rhett was your sole priority. 

Spinning on your heel, you dashed back outside, grabbing the barn door and slamming it shut, securing the latch before you scrambled back over to the snowmobile. 

Once you reached the house, the main battle was getting him up the porch steps and into the house. You killed the engine and jumped to the ground, moving to Rhett’s aid. 

“I’ve got you, I’m here,” you told him. Again, you lifted him, struggling to pull him out of the sled. You tried to lay him gently on the ground, but ended up dropping him. 

“Sorry! Sorry! I’m so sorry!” You exclaimed, tears pricking your eyes. But jarring him was entirely unavoidable. Especially since you had to get him up the steps. 

Groaning laboriously, you grabbed onto him again and managed to drag him to the porch steps, hauling him up until you collapsed onto the porch beside him. 

You let out a breath and stood on unsteady legs to open the door, after which you continued to drag him into the house, to safety. 

Once you had him inside, you kicked the door shut, and then pulled him the rest of the way into the living room, away from the drafty entryway. 

You ripped your mittens and hat off, then shrugged out of your heavy coat and under-jacket. Once your arms and hands were free, you made quick work of getting Rhett out of his clothes. 

You pulled his hat off, then you unzipped his coat and lifted him enough to pull the opposing fabric off of him, leaving him in his sweater underneath. He was so cold, even under his layers, and it sent an icy twinge of fear through you. You needed to get him warm, his life depended on it. 

“I’m gonna get you warm, I promise.” At that point, your tears wouldn’t stop. They ran down your cheeks as you worked to care for your husband, dripping down onto your hands that fought to undress him. 

Though you were panicked, you kept your movements gentle. You knew being rough with him could only exacerbate the problem. 

You obsessively checked that he was breathing, terrified that you would lose him. But as far as you could tell, he was still taking in oxygen. 

Once he was stripped down to his underwear, you scrambled to grab all the blankets in the living room. Just as you knelt beside him again to wrap him up, he stirred, letting out a soft groan. 

“Baby?” You hovered over him, eyes wide as you watched him stir again. “Rhett, can you hear me?”

Another soft groan, but he wasn’t fully conscious. Instead, you continued bundling him up in blankets. Once he was significantly covered, you ran upstairs to grab some towels, throwing them in the dryer to get them warm, along with a pair of woolen socks to put on his feet. 

It was then that you realized how badly you were shaking. Your hands trembled so terribly that you could barely hit the button to turn on the dryer. 

While the towels and socks were warming, you ran back downstairs. Rhett still remained on the floor under the blankets you’d wrapped him in. But you could see that he was stirring again. 

You landed beside him, calling his name. To your surprise, his eyes slowly opened, and he moaned, squinting at the light. 

“You’re safe,” you said, “you’re home with me.”

His eyes drifted shut again, but he let out another sound, and suddenly, he was attempting to sit upright. 

“Hey, it’s okay, don’t try to get up,” you soothed.

He looked up at you in confusion. “What…wh-what happened?” He mumbled, voice slightly slurred. 

“I found you in the woods. You were unconscious.”

His brow furrowed, and suddenly, concern washed over his face. “Oh no, June,” he gasped. 

“It’s okay, I got her back to the barn.”

That seemed to calm him down, and he tried to sit up again, but you stopped him. “Stay there, baby. I’ll be right back.” 

You hurried back upstairs to retrieve everything from the dryer, and in a few moments, you were back at your husband's side. 

You were quick to open the layers of blankets, pressing the warm towels to his upper body and groin area, closing the blankets back around him to hold in the warmth. Then you put the woolen socks on his feet. 

Once you finished, you moved over to stoke the dying fire, adding another log to the fireplace while you were at it. Soon, the fire roared back to life, providing warmth throughout the entire room. 

You sat back down on the floor, moving so you could hold Rhett’s head in your lap. You ran your hands through his hair, and your eyes blurred with tears again as you gazed down at him. 

“You scared me to death,” you whispered. “I thought…I thought I lost you.” 

“‘m sorry,” he mumbled softly.

You closed your eyes, willing your tears not to fall again. But it was futile, and they spilled hotly down your cheeks anyway.

“I fell,” you heard him whisper. “I remember now. I lost m’ footing a-and hit my head.”

“Oh, baby,” you whimpered. “I’m so sorry. I should’ve come looking for you sooner.”

“S’okay. You found me.” He smiled lazily, but it did nothing to calm your heart. You wanted to burst into sobs, but you managed to hold them back. 

He likely had a concussion, or worse. But there was no way you could get him to the hospital in this weather. You had no choice but to simply take care of him and hope for the best. 

And that’s exactly what you did. You stayed by his side for hours that night, caring for the man to whom you’d promised “for better or worse” when you spoke your vows to him. And you were certainly in the midst of the or worse.

But you made good on that promise, and you cared for him into the wee hours of the morning, until consciousness seemed to finally come to him fully, and he no longer shivered in your arms. 

When he felt that he was able to get up, you helped him move up to the couch, instructing him to stay put while you ran to get pajamas for him. You tossed those in the dyer for a few minutes before rejoining him in the living room. 

“I can do it,” he said, when you moved to help him dress. 

You reached your hand out, lovingly stroking his jaw. “Let me, handsome man. You’ve been through a lot, I just want to take care of you.”

To your surprise, he didn’t protest again. He let you put the thermal pajamas on him, and once you were finished, you wrapped him back up in the blankets and kissed his forehead. 

“Would you like some cocoa?” You asked. 

He smiled softly. “Please.”

So you busied yourself with making it, preparing two cups and soon bringing them back to the living room, where he still remained huddled on the couch. 

Finally, you settled in beside him, wrapping one of his blankets around you both. You needed him close. It reminded you that he was alive, and that you hadn’t lost him. 

As you sat in the silence of the moment, you found yourself overcome with emotion again, and you nuzzled in close to Rhett. 

“I was so scared you were going to die on me,” you whispered, the confession hanging in the air like thick, swirling smoke. 

Rhett reached out to squeeze your thigh. “But I didn’t. I’m a little banged up, but I’m okay, darlin’. You didn’t lose me.”

“I know, I just…” you trailed off, imagining a life without him. Imagining bringing your baby into the world without him. Again, your tears fell, and this time, you couldn’t stop them. 

The dam broke, and quiet sobs began to leave you. Without hesitating, Rhett pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you. 

“Shh. It’s okay, sweetheart. I’m okay.”

You felt awful for falling apart before him when he’d just endured so much, but you couldn’t help it. He held you to his chest and let you cry. Little did he know there was so much more to it than just being afraid for his safety. 

You longed to reveal to him the true reason for your outpouring of emotion, but it wasn’t the right time. You couldn’t tell him now. 

Instead, you let yourself cry, and when your tears eventually slowed, you pulled back, wiping your damp cheeks. “I’m sorry,” you whispered. 

Rhett shook his head, reaching up to run his knuckles over your cheek. “Don’t be. I’m sorry I scared ya so bad. I really thought I’d be fine. And I woulda been, too, if I hadn’t fallen like a fuckin’ idiot.” His mouth quirked into a smile at his self-deprecation. 

You smiled despite yourself, but soon fell serious. “I’m just glad I got to you before it was too late.”

“I am too. And don’t you go blamin’ yourself for any of this. I’m the one who insisted on going out there. Me and my hardheadedness.” 

“What matters is you’re home safe, with me.” And what a relief it was.

Soon after your heartfelt reverie on the couch, Rhett admitted that he was exhausted, so you guided him upstairs. However, while he slept peacefully under the warmth of your blankets, you couldn’t sleep a wink. You watched him like a hawk, terrified that something might happen, no thanks to the head injury he’d sustained.

Once the weather cleared, you were going to get Rhett in for a doctor’s appointment, just to make sure he had no lasting damage from what he’d endured. You knew he would put up a fuss over it, but you didn’t care. It was better to be safe than sorry, and you weren’t taking any chances.

But for now, all you could do was watch over him. And you did, until your exhaustion overwhelmed you and you could hardly keep your eyes open any longer. 

Christmas day had already dawned, bringing a morning clear and bright. The snow had finally stopped, but the cold persisted, with bitter winds moaning through the rafters of your home. 

But you were safe within those four walls, wrapped in your husband’s arms. Even in sleep, you were subconsciously holding him closer, relieved that he was okay. 

You both slept Christmas day away, and by the time evening rolled around, Rhett was the first to open his eyes. He groaned softly beside you, and the sound pulled you out of your sleep immediately, sending you upright in bed as your eyes frantically scanned him to make sure he was okay. 

A warm hand reached for you, pressing against your thigh. “‘m okay, darlin’,” he assured you, sensing your sleep-induced panic. 

You let out a breath, easing yourself back down beside him. “S-sorry,” you whispered. 

“It’s okay.” He pulled you to him, nuzzling his face against your neck. After a few moments of silence, he spoke again, voice gravelly against your skin. “Sorry I ruined Christmas.”

You threaded your fingers through his hair and gently pulled his head back to look at you. “Rhett Abbott, don’t you even say that. You didn’t ruin Christmas. You’re here, warm and safe in our bed. That’s the best Christmas present I ever could’ve asked for.”

He smiled softly. “I love you. I really am sorry I scared ya so bad. Next time I’ll be more careful.”

You hugged him to your chest before finally breaking away, glancing at the bedside clock. “It’s 5 pm, but how would you like a Christmas breakfast?”

Again, he smiled. “I’d love one.”

“Okay. Stay here, I’ll bring it to you in bed.”

But he adamantly protested. “No ma’am. I’m sittin’ myself down in front of the fireplace while you cook. Don’t wanna be up here all alone.”

You stood from the bed and held your hand out to him. “C’mon then, handsome man.”

He took your hand and allowed you to pull him out of bed. He groaned as he stood, realizing just how sore he was from the night before. 

“Damn, I’m sore,” he remarked. 

“How’s your head, baby?” You asked. 

“Hurts like a bitch.” 

You pressed a gentle hand to his cheek, your heart aching for him. “I’ll get you some meds to help with the pain,” you assured him. 

You leaned in to kiss him, lingering against him for a moment before you parted. You intertwined your fingers with his and led him out of the bedroom and downstairs. 

When you reached the living room, you fussed over him, having him sit down on the couch while you wrapped a blanket around his shoulders before moved to reignite the fire. 

Of course, Rhett tried to protest and tell you he could do it himself. But you gave him a look, and it shut him up right away. After all you'd endured in the last 24 hours, you would be damned if you didn’t take care of him, if only to give yourself peace of mind. 

After he was settled in, you strolled into the kitchen and grabbed some pain medicine and a glass of water, handing both to your husband before set about preparing food. As you worked, you took pause, whispering a prayer of thanks that you were able to do this. In your heart of hearts, you knew you’d never take the ability to love and care for your husband for granted again. 

After the scariest night of your life, you were grateful to do something as mundane as making him food. And when you’d finally finished preparing it all, you joined him on the couch and ate your dinner of pancakes together, and it was a sweet moment you would forever cherish. 

You remained cuddled into him, always touching some part of him. And he welcomed it. Although he’d long since warmed up from his exposure to the elements, he still seemed to have a perpetual chill, and he welcomed your comforting warmth. 

A calming silence fell between you as you sat together, basking in the glow of the Christmas tree and the warmth of the hearth. No words needed to be spoken. You’d already said all you needed to say, and now, it was time to soak up every last moment you could together. 

However, with a childlike twinkle in the blue of his eye, Rhett finally turned to you, mouth curving into a smile as he said, “how ‘bout we open presents?”

Your heart quickened in your chest. It was time. 

You nodded your head and returned his smile. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

And so, at six o’clock in the evening, your Christmas morning commenced. You stood from the couch and rifled under the tree, pulling out gifts. You handed Rhett the ones you’d gotten him, and pulled out the ones from him to you. 

Of course, you saved one very special present of his for last. 

Together, you snuggled back up on the couch and began tearing into the gifts. Rhett was not the most outwardly expressive guy, so you never expected a big reaction out of him when he opened things. 

He did his best to be animated for you, though, not wanting to come across as ungrateful. He thanked you with sweet smiles and gentle kisses. 

Once he’d opened his gifts, it was time for you to open yours. He watched, eyes bright and eager, as you unwrapped each present he’d tried so hard to wrap nicely. His gift wrapping skills were certainly lacking, but he tried, and it touched your heart. 

He’d gotten you a few things you needed, and the last gift was something special. When you pulled back the paper, you were met with the sight of a black jewelry box. 

Eyes widening, you opened the box, and gasped softly. Inside was a delicate gold pendant. Engraved on the pendant were the words ‘me and you’. Those three words were significant because they were what Rhett often uttered to you. 

“It’s me and you against the world, darlin’,” he’d say. 

“Me and you,” you’d echo. 

You looked at him, tears shining in your eyes. “Oh, Rhett,” you whispered. 

“You like it?” He asked, face hopeful. 

“I love it, baby. It’s perfect. Thank you.” 

You leaned in to kiss him, too verklempt to say anything else. 

“Here, let me put it on ya.” 

You carefully pulled the necklace out of the box and handed it to him before you turned around. With the gentlest of touches, he fastened the chain around your neck. For a man who worked with his hands, those very hands were so delicate in the way that they handled you. He made you feel like a precious, valued treasure. 

When you turned back around, he admired the look of the necklace against your skin. “Beautiful, m’love,” he hummed. 

You kissed him again, mouth warm and gentle on his. When you parted, you took in a breath, and spoke. “I have one more thing for you.”

With a racing heart and trembling hands, you knelt before the Christmas tree, leaning down and reaching all the way to the back, where you’d stowed away the gift that would change the course of your lives together. 

You stood, gingerly holding the package as if it would break, and turned back to Rhett. He looked up at you with curious eyes, lips curving into an unsure smile. 

“Whatcha got in there? A puppy?” He joked. 

“Better,” you replied, finally handing him the box. He noticed the tremor in your hands as you did, and his brow furrowed. 

“You’re shakin’, sweetheart.”

“Just open the present. You’ll understand why.” You sat beside him, your body thrumming with excitement and fear all at once. You felt like a live wire. 

Rhett set about tearing off the wrapper, tossing it aside. Then, he opened the top of the box, and you held your breath as you watched his face, your heart going wild within your chest. 

He was dead silent as he gazed down at the contents of the box. Then, moments later, he reached his hand in and pulled out the small hat and the pregnancy test. Now, his own hands were trembling. 

You waited for him to speak, too afraid to break the spell of silence. 

But he couldn’t speak. You knew this because when he looked at you, there were tears in his eyes, and his bottom lip was wobbling. 

He held the test up, opening his mouth as if to say something, but closing it again. He couldn’t get the words out. They were inhibited by the tightening knot in his throat. 

But you knew what he was trying to say without the words even having to leave his mouth. 

“You’re gonna be a daddy,” you whispered. 

He nodded, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, he was reaching for you, pulling you into his body and holding you close. He buried his face against your neck, and you soon felt the dampness of his tears against your skin. 

In turn, tears sprang to your own eyes once again, and you both sat there, in the middle of your living room, holding each other and letting yourselves cry. 

You had no idea how much time had passed. It seemed like ages, but somehow, also no time at all. When you parted, your tears had slowed, though your eyes still shined. 

“‘m sorry,” Rhett apologized, laughing slightly as he wiped his cheeks with the back of his hand. “Didn’t expect to have a reaction like that. It just hit me real hard.” Then, a large, warm hand splayed over your belly. “There’s a little bitty baby in here?”

“There sure is,” you replied, voice still wavering from your emotion. 

He pulled you to him again, hugging you tightly. “I can’t believe it.” Then, he pulled back to rest his forehead against yours. “I’m gonna be a father. Holy shit.” 

You couldn’t help but giggle softly at his amazement. You lifted your hand to brush his hair out of his face, letting your hand fall to rest on his neck. “And you’re going to be a wonderful father, too.” 

“I don’t know about that, but I sure am gonna try.” He glanced down, his palm covering your stomach again. “I just…wow. Our baby is just hangin’ out in here, safe and warm.” 

But his wonder soon melted into grave concern. His face went slack as his gaze met yours, realization dawning on him. “You had to go through everything you did last night, all while you’re expectin’ a baby?” 

The thought of you putting yourself through such an ordeal made his heart twist in his chest. As morbid as it was, his mind began to drift to the terrible thought of you losing your little one because of him. Because he’d given you reason to put yourself through hell and back just to find him. 

You tried to cut in, tried to calm his already racing mind, but it was too late. “God, you went through all that because of me. You drug my sorry ass home in a dangerous fuckin’ storm. You put yourself at risk, all because I was stubborn and had to go after that damn horse. What if-”

“Rhett.”

“What if somethin’ happens? All because of me?” 

You could see the fear written clear across his face. So you lifted your hands, placing them over his own, and shushed him gently. “Baby, it’s okay. My body does a good job of protecting this little one. I feel okay, as far as I can tell nothing is wrong. But I promise you right now, I will go to the doctor as soon as the weather improves. I just want to know for sure that everything is alright.”

Rhett nodded, his shoulders relaxing only slightly. His face still remained hard with concern. “If something goes wrong, I w-”

“Shh,” you soothed, squeezing his hands. “Don’t. I’m not letting my mind go there. Like I said, I feel okay. But I’ll go to the doctor to be certain. Until then, let’s not jump to any conclusions. It’ll only drive us both crazy.”

He let out a breath, nodding his head. “Okay. You’re right. I’ll try to stay calm until you go to the doc.”

You reached up, tipping his chin so he’d look at you. “No matter what happens, it’s you and me against the world, okay?”

“You and me,” he responded. 

Your lips met in a tender kiss, and you both found some semblance of peace. 

In the end, it was all going to be okay. You would make that trip to the doctor, and sit in the ultrasound room, clutching your husband’s hand as you waited with bated breath to make sure your little one was unharmed. 

And as fate would have it, the babe would turn out to be perfectly fine. A few months later, you would give birth to a healthy baby boy. 

And the moment you saw the love and adoration shining in Rhett’s eyes as he beheld the tiny life he held in his strong arms, you would quickly  realize that all you’d endured that fateful Christmas was well worth it, for it had all brought you to this very moment. The best moment of your lives. 

-

taglist: tagging those who i think might be interested? love u all

@callmemana @milesmillergf @queenbbarnes @dhwanishah09 @marchingicenotes7 @daisychainsinknots @odegaardsblues @oncasette @hangmanapologist @lelapine @rhettabbotts @withahappyrefrain @downinroma @mothdruid @roosterbruiser @ravenmoore14 @ollie-frog @nobody7102 @phoenixhalliwell @bradshawsbitch @its-dee-lovely @reader6898 @bellawind @lexy15 @andtheswordwentsnickersnack @oceanablue @sebsxphia @beachbabey @floyd-luvr @bradshawsbaby

[green-typewriterz]

Can you write some angsty stuff followed by fluff. Something with Harry styles.

Basically reader being heavier and insecure had no male attention all her life. She is a big time introvert and opens up after a lot of struggle. But her life changes when Harry makes an entry.

Until I Found You - Harry Styles

Harry Styles x fem!reader Summary: You’ve never been overly confident, but then someone comes along and makes you feel things you’ve never felt Warnings: angst to fluff, body insecurity, Harry being perfect as per usual Word count: 1K words

I hope this is what you were looking for lovely! Thank you so much for requesting!

You were no stranger to the judging stares that came with the industry you were in, fashion was a tough career as it is without everyone thinking you couldn’t be fashionable just because you weren’t thin. It’s not like you could escape it either, the main part of your job being styling overly self-obsessed celebrities who think they’re perfect and everyone else is ugly. You always tried to stay confident, posting outfit of the days and filtering out hate comments for your own mental health, but somehow some always got through and you would be lying if you said it never affected you.

You assumed this would be the same, some singer you didn’t really care enough about judging you and shitting on your outfit choices even though most of the time you put them in their own wardrobe and they were too stupid to realise they picked the clothes themselves. You walked into the dressing room to see this one particular celebrity talking with your PA who was helping him pick from the sequins you would later have to meticulously embroider.

“You must be Harry,” you spoke, walking over with your hand outstretched for him to shake, “I’m Y/N, I'm your designer!” He took your hand immediately, shaking it without breaking eye contact. He was wearing a simple short-sleeved t-shirt with a pair of ripped jeans. His hair was pushed back away from his face with a pair of brown Gucci sunglasses and he wore two necklaces, one made of pearl and the other a cross.

He smiled warmly before replying, “I know who you are. The famous Y/N Y/L/N? C’mon, you’re renowned. Thank you for taking the time to come and help me.” His voice was soft and genuine (which you will admit created butterflies in your stomach) then you quickly got to work on creating the outfit that he would wear to the Grammys. He pointed at crystals every now and then, commenting on how they’d match his shoes or his nails - which he planned to paint pink. At this current moment, they were a deep shade of blue, almost the same colour as his navy Adidas gazelles. 

You had just assumed that Harry was just being nice but - though he was being polite - he found himself unable to take his eyes off of you. He had heard about you through the endless attack of hate that you got just for looking how you look. Harry never understood it, he thought you were beautiful, often seeing photos of you and thinking of Italian Renaissance statues.

The day ended quickly and for that, you couldn’t be happier. You got in your car and cried, tears hot against your cheeks as you thought back to how you felt that day. Harry didn’t stop staring at you, at your body. You knew that most people didn’t like how you looked, but the fact that he looked at you for so long. It made you want to shrink into the floor. You were still in your car, having just stopped crying when you reached the impulsive part of your breakdowns so you got out your phone and sent a tweet.

Y/N

So fucking sick of all this body hatred in my line of work. My body is beautiful purely because it is mine and it exists, get over it.

You immediately closed your phone, knowing you wouldn’t feel regret until the inevitable negative comments came a few hours later. You drove home and collapsed onto your sofa, feeling overly proud of yourself for what you had tweeted. Well, that was until you got a text message from Harry asking if the tweet was about him. You weren’t sure how to respond, not wanting to face the problem head-on this early. But, deciding it could only get worse, you replied.

Y/N

So?

There was no reply for a while, then:

Harry

We need to talk this through in person. Meet me in St James’ Park. Please. - H

You froze. No one had ever done this before. You knew that it was getting late, but something was drawing you there so you grabbed your coat and a pair of gloves before rushing out the door, the park only being a five-minute walk from you.

You debated walking up to him, standing there hoping he would keep his eyes on the sunset so you could just turn around and go. Of course that didn’t happen. “Y/N. I wanted to apologise for today. I sincerely promise I didn’t mean to make you feel like that.” 

You crossed your arms, staring into his bright eyes. “Cut the shit. I have gotten the same treatment from every other celebrity I’ve worked with Harry. Each one thinks they're better than me because they have every person's dream body.” You spoke, your words creating a mist in the cold.

He shook his head and stepped closer. “I promise you. That’s not what I was thinking.”

You scoffed, looking away from him as you unfolded your arms. You didn’t believe him even though deep down you wanted to. He took your hands suddenly and you met his gaze again, his eyes filled with an emotion you’d never seen before. 

“Is it so hard to believe that I find you intoxicatingly beautiful?” He asked, brows furrowed in confusion. He stepped closer again. “Everything about you, call me corny but I feel like i haven’t seen beauty like yours since I saw the statues in Rome.”

You blushed as he slowly moved his hands from your hands to your waist, his soft grip settling there as if it were the place it was destined to be. You stared at his lips, seeing them curve into a soft smile full of adoration. He leaned in slowly, making sure you wanted the same as him. You met his lips in the cold, the taste of his mint gum lingering on his lips.

“I’ve always been crazy about you, Y/N.” He whispered as you pulled away. You rested your foreheads against one another, hands still on each other's waists. This was something you never wanted to end.

The sun had set a long while ago, but the two of you were still in the park, quietly talking as you held hands, looking at the stars from an old rickety bench. Harry liked you for both your body and your heart and that was something you thought you’d never get.