#and the last one is a compromise because i couldn't find any lines about living animals | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cipheress-to-k-pop · 5 months ago

Text

I'm here (j.t.)

Pairing: Jason Todd x Reader

Warnings: Kissing.

Word Count: 2.7k

Song Rec: I love you, I'm sorry by Gracie Abrams

It was hard to enjoy the cold when Jason was surrounded by the uncomfortable heat of tailpipes and exhaust vents and the bustle of Gothamites around him. He could feel himself break out into a sweat even though he was on the roof of a building, where he had been for the last twenty minutes.

He had taken off his helmet, preferring to keep only his domino on but even then, he felt like he couldn't breathe easy. He could easily blame the city's shitty climate but deep down he knew the reason was across the street from him.

He watched as the lights flicked on; his view obstructed due to the frosted glass that he had begged you to put up. You hated closing the curtains because you felt it made your already small apartment even smaller and he hated the fact that anyone across the street could catch a glimpse into your home.

He could really see the irony in that now as he wished for a better view of your face.

But even without it, he could clearly envision you coming home from a long day, dumping your bag at the door, and kicking off your shoes, refusing to kick off your socks in the same way and instead tossing them into the hamper. Dirty socks were your pet peeve, one that he learnt extremely early into the relationship.

However, you also refused for him to wear shoes in your home, and he hated being barefooted, so you compromised and got him a couple spare socks and a pair of slippers. He wondered if they were still there in the lowest drawer of your shoe cabinet.

You'd immediately sit on the ground to rest your legs after walking four blocks from the subway station instead of a chair because you didn't want your 'outside clothes' to touch your clean furniture.

A melancholic smile spread across Jason's lips as something beautiful, yet painful began to coil around his chest. He loved that he could still remember every single thing about you. It was those little features; the way you'd always forget your towel in the dryer while taking a shower and begging Jason to bring it to you, the tiny welt in the corner on your lips that you got from biting them til they'd bleed, that lock of hair at the back of your head that was a different texture than the rest. It was those that would bring him back to Earth whenever the green of the pit seemed to blind him.

The lines of your body were the only thing he envisioned when he closed his eyes, the mellifluous flow of your voice threading through his eardrums whenever he had any quiet, the heat of your phantom fingertips tracing up his arms and wrapping around his waist as he laid alone in bed.

You haunted him, your memories tormented him, and he wondered if you were in the same boat as him, simply existing but not living. He wondered how you would feel if you heard the deep baritone of his voice now that he's grown into a man, or the heat from his chest when he enveloped your now much smaller form in his arms.

He wondered if you were wondering about him. He wondered if you were lying alone like him or had his side of the bed already been claimed by somebody else. Someone who was smarter and sweeter and better.

The pragmatic side of him told him that he should be happy if you managed to find another. Afterall, he loved you so much if you asked him to carve out his own breaking heart and place it in your palms, he would, if only to see the smile on your face. So, he should be happy if you were happy.

However, rest of him banged against his ribcage with bloody fists, begging for it not to be true.

He scolded himself while his feet mindlessly took him to your apartment building, and he was left staring at the frosted glass of your window.

He knew it would end up this way, he just knew it. When he had first come out from the Lazarus pit, he was adamant not to meet you again, convinced that you would be better off without him.

Then he kept thinking about you and he concluded that he'd only see you once, if only to see that you were doing well and taking care of yourself. And then he'd never tempt himself again.

And then he promised himself he'd only watch you from afar, desperately trying to catch glances of you like a parched man would savour the smallest drop of water.

Then he got even greedier. His heart tugged him so hard that he almost fell off the roof in his haste to grapple across the street and climb down the fire escape til your apartment building.

He promised himself this would be the last. He would stop here. He would only listen to your voice while a wall separated the both of you. He would stop there.

Jason listened to you sing while you washed the dishes, your voice only fading to a dull hum through the wall and his brows furrowed, leaning his forehead against it as he tried to catch every wave of your voice.

Then eventually it was silent, and he stared at his feet for a couple seconds before sighing and beginning to stand.

He didn't know why he continued to come see you. Every time the fleeting glance of you passed, he was left feeling an empty chasm that seemed to drag his stomach into a blackhole. He was unable to get out of bed the next day, despaired by the fact that you were able to go about your day while he was stuck in his own hell.

So, why did he continue to do it? Why did he feel your absence like critters crawling all over his skin and only feeling a semblance of relief when he knows that he's near you? Why can he only feel better when he feels his heart pounding in his chest when he thinks that at any moment you could accidentally spot him where he was hiding even though he'd be constantly disappointed? And yet, he still hoped you'd spot him again.

He'd hear the lights click shut any second now before you crawled into bed, falling asleep while clutching your phone and scrolling through Instagram.

He was always disheartened at the end of these nights, when he realized that he was the only one lingering outside in the cold as he waited for you to notice him, to long for him. But yet again, you managed to get through another day without losing yourself in your grief, unlike him.

Was it really that easy for you to get over him? He was standing outside your apartment, wishing to go back to the nights where you used to invite him in with open arms while you remained oblivious to how much he missed you.

He turned his back to leave when he heard a click and then a noisy squeak of the hinges as you pushed the window open.

Your wide eyes met his stormy blue and you froze.

"Hey, beautiful."

There was a beat of silence between the two of you that was filled with the sounds of Gotham and you continued to stare at him, shocked into a stupor. Finally, it seemed like you were able to knock your consciousness back into your body and you squeezed your eyes shut and began counting backward from ten.

"He’s not really here, (Y/N). Jason is gone. You were there at the funeral. You watched them lower his body into his grave, (Y/N). He's gone. And he's not coming back."

Jason watched your throat bob like a lone acorn down a tempestuous river and you squeezed your eyes shut tighter, flared nostrils telling him that you were on the verge of tears. Your fingers curled into a tight grip that had your knuckles turning a shade lighter.

Now he knew why he was so anxious about seeing you again. Why, when one foot had taken a step toward you, the other remained anchored to his spot until you walked past him. While he was worried that you had moved on from him, he was even more terrified to see the effect that his death had on you.

When he came back to Gotham and he realized that he had been erased and replaced by Bruce, it was only easy for him to think you had done the same thing. It was easier for him to think he had been abandoned by the entire world. But he was always scared to find out if he was right, so he kept his distance.

However, he was even more scared to find out that you had been left missing him because of a stupid mistake he had made as a child when you had begged him not to. You had known he was beginning to go off the rails, that he was getting rebellious, and you had begged him not to do anything rash.

He had just taken it as a sign that you didn't believe in him either, that you were just like the others, and he had sought to prove you wrong. He laid on the blood of the warehouse, beaten bloody and waiting for his father to rescue him and wishing that you wouldn't be too despaired by his immature stupidity.

Now watching you dig the heels of your palms into your eyes, as if trying to erase what you had just seen, he felt guilty for putting you in that position. He shouldn't be here, he shouldn't have left, he shouldn't have loved you in the first place.

Still, he couldn't move.

You took a deep breath and opened your eyes, blinking a couple times at the ground before you could raise your head again.

Your shoulders slumped and your eyes began to fill with tears, "That usually works."

"(Y/N)," he whispered, reaching for you put his fingertips stopped right before crossing your windowsill as though there was a physical barrier stopping him from touching you. His hand trembled in the air before he dropped it to his side, "It’s me."

This was something he had been dreaming of every night since coming back. He dreamed of reuniting with you, of touching you again, of loving you again. But now that the opportunity was an inch away from him, he was worried that his last chance at love had died within the flames of the warehouse that night.

You stayed still, eyes flickering over him, starting with the mop of dark curls on the top of his head and raking down his face, the same features you remembered had grown more masculine. You lingered on the different scars littering his skin, analysing every inch of him with concentration that made him want to shuffle uneasily.

Your expression began to melt into uncertainty and longing the more you continued to stare at him before you suddenly gasped and stepped back, "You’re crazy, (Y/N). He's gone, this isn't really happening."

He grasped the window just as you began to close it shut, "Please, don't. I’m here, baby, I’m really here."

You stared at the hand holding your window open with furrowed brows; you hadn't expected this illusion to retaliate against you trying to end this dream.

You never opened the windows of your apartment, especially not at night. You never wanted to invite Gotham’s smog inside your home but for some reason tonight your heart had tugged you toward it with such power you thought a breath of fresh air would have done you some good.

Why? Why tonight of all nights had you opened the window? Had you even opened the window in the first place? Or had this been a cruel game played by your mind while you were asleep?

"You died," you whispered, voice barely above a decibel, "I saw you dead. You aren't really here. This doesn't make any sense."

You wanted to touch him, you wanted to feel his beating heart underneath your fingertips but you knew that he would evaporate into smoke the second you reached for him like all the other times and even though you knew you would breakdown the second you woke up from the dream, you wanted to continue looking at him and drink in his presence that you had missed so much.

Gloved fingers lifted your chin so your wet eyes could meet his and tears began streaming down your cheeks in thick rivulets, your chest collapsing from the weight of your sobs.

"I know it doesn't make any sense, but I’m here. I’m really here. And I’ve missed you so much."

You shook your head, "You’re not. You're dead."

His arms circled around you, and he brought you into a hug. Your cheek rested against the kevlar of his suit, hips digging into the windowsill as you continued to sob and despite knowing that he wasn't really here, your chest began to fill with warmth.

"I’m here, (Y/N)."

Jason stole what little breath you had left in your lungs when he leant down to capture your lips in a firm kiss, as if trying to prove to you that he was here in the flesh, with fresh blood pumping through his veins.

You sobbed against his lips and licked into his mouth, hands coming up to grasp at his hair while his own curved your back into him, melding your bodies into one.

Heavy boots thumped against your floors, knees knocking in his effort to climb through the window and shut it behind him before pressing you against it. He quickly threw off his utility belt before you had wrapped your legs around his waist to prevent any of his weapons accidentally hurting you.

You cupped his jaw, thumb brushing against the peak of his cheekbone. The action had Jason’s eyes rolling back in ecstasy, every single touch setting his body on fire, each nerve ending sparking with electricity. He kissed you harder, refusing to pull away even though he knew you were getting breathless. He could hear your gasps for air every time you parted but you still dragged him back toward you with a hand clutching the roots of his hair.

He couldn't stop, wanting to lose himself in your very soul. He could feel the heat of your body pressing against him, he could smell the familiar scent of your shampoo, his ears were filled with the sound of your sighs and your lips smacking, his tongue tasted the salt of your tears mixed with the sharp chill of spearmint tea.

He finally pulled away when you had placed a hand on his chest, pressing his forehead against you, watching with intense passion as you tried to catch your breath, his grip on your thighs not loosening.

You trailed wet lips down his throat, listening to his quiet sighs until your lips reached his jugular. You could feel his veins pulse with life underneath your lips and your chest began pounding, butterflies beginning to erupt through you.

"You’re really here? You're alive? H-how is that even possible?"

Jason nodded, only realizing then that his eyes were filling up with tears, lashes and cheeks wet once you had begun to stroke the skin beneath his ear.

"I missed you so much." you confessed, voice breaking and brows furrowing in despair.

"I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn't come sooner, I should've-I should've come sooner. I’m sorry." he whispered, trailing his lips along your shoulder, hiding his face into the crook of your neck and you sighed, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

"You’re here," you whispered, chest shaking with a mix of sobs and elated giggles, "You're really here. You're finally here."

You both remained there, your back pressed against the frosted glass window that had fogged up slightly, legs wrapped tightly around his waist, chests pressed together.

"I’m here."

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454 notes · View notes

bestworstcase · 2 years ago

Note

Loved your recent Light & Dark meta, but I am curious, how would you rationalize Dark's decision to fuck up the moon when he left, seemingly just to be a dick?

well it’s less about rationalizing (<- in the common sense of constructing a moral justification) than it is trying to tease out whether and to what degree dark may have intended for humankind to be reborn from the ashes—or in other words if he was primarily motivated by emotional reaction to salem/light/the rebellion or else playing the long game to get his brother to leave with him.

the… for lack of a better phrase, ‘lightest grey’ reading here is that dark let his brother curse salem, vaporized millions of people, and left the whole planet in flames behind him as a gambit to liberate humanity from himself and his brother, because he no longer believed that compromise was possible. that’s interesting from a character perspective but by no means does it make him ‘good’ or ‘right’—and in the broader sense of rationalization as simply explaining why he does things, it probably bears repeating again that dark is an emotional being who is clearly very, very fed up with the situation and it’s not contradictory for him to both have an agenda and act with petty cruelty while pursuing it.

with that being said, hinges OFF!

i’m gonna also tag in @lizarr7’s reply on the op because it’s salient to the topic and probably the best place to begin:

Light is afraid of change. I think that's the simplest and most distilled way of putting it.

Also I'm not convinced we've seen the last of Dark. After all, if the tree kicked them out on the terms that they couldn't return until they found unity or whatever, why would it let one brother in without the other, especially when the very reason he is returning is because they haven't? I don't think dark could ascend if he wanted to. I don't think the tree would let him.

as a point of clarification, while the tree makes the door for the brothers explicitly because their fight is harming the ever after, they are not exiled in the punitive sense and it is actually somewhat unclear whether they were made to leave as opposed to just being given the means to; more broadly it’s unclear to what extent the tree is an active force at all.

i don’t think the tree is entirely passive—the blacksmith is an aspect of the tree and obviously she is a thinking, feeling being with philosophical opinions!—but a core tenet of the blacksmith’s ideology is non-intervention. the joy of creating is “the not knowing [what the creations will become]” and balance is “an ecosystem, an organism, a living breathing thing” which “cannot be restored with force or calculation” because “true balance finds its own equilibrium.” that’s a pretty hard line against direct interference or management, and when ruby finds her in the tree, the blacksmith tells her “the only thing that can happen to you here is what you want to happen; the choice of what you become and where you end up is yours to make.” she offers ruby guidance because ruby isn’t able to articulate what she wants, but she can’t (or at least, won’t) make ruby’s choices for her. the red prince is an important data point here in that it’s demonstrably possible to ascend toward the worst version of yourself instead of the best, if you do choose. so i don’t think the tree would ever prohibit an ascension, for better or worse.

in any case, this is how the blacksmith recounts the brothers’ departure:

The Ever After could no longer bear the Brothers’ experiments. And so, the Tree built them a special doorway to a greater beyond where the Brothers could try creating worlds of their own. A doorway that would remain open for the Brothers’ return, and any of their creations. And what truly remarkable things they accomplished, whenever the Brothers’ creations have come to the Ever After.

i do not get the sense that the tree intended their exile as a punishment or imposed any restrictions on when or how they could return, beyond “if you’re going to fight, take it outside.” rather i think the brothers took this “greater beyond” as a place where they could resolve a vicious fight neither of them wanted to be having and reconcile with each other. before all of this happened they were constant companions who did everything together! they were always very different, but for a long time they found harmony in their differences, not conflict.

before they leave, dark glances at light and inclines his head as if to ask “ready?” and then waits for light to nod before he steps through. there’s some tension under the surface—dark is standing rather stiffly with his hands clenched into fists behind his back, he’s not super happy to be leaving—but a sense of camaraderie also. and of course the whole thing ultimately kicked off because the brothers wanted to try new things and see what else they could do. the tree kicked them out in the way that you’d tell roughhousing kids to go play outside. it’s a consequence of bad behavior but not a punishment.

hence my thinking is that the brothers themselves were deeply invested in negotiating a compromise and tried their absolute best to do so, but were stymied by their incompatible ideas about, fundamentally, the value of destruction and the place it should have in their world.

the narrative of ‘the two brothers’ is, i think, probably accurate in the essentials of what the conflict developed into:

Though they had distinct personalities and competing desires, they were still connected and did not feel whole unless they were together. Since they could not agree on where to go, they decided to create a world for themselves.

[…]

One day the God of Light approached his brother. “I have been trying to create a beautiful world for us, but your creations spoil it.”

“Your creations are almost as dull as the unending void was,” said the God of Darkness. “If this place is going to entertain us, we need to make things lively.” With that, the God of Darkness brought forth earthquakes and volcanoes that tore his brother’s continent apart into smaller lands, boiled the oceans, rained fire and ash, and wiped out all the living things.

(NB: the creations light refers to are the moon, deserts, mountains, canyons, and grimm. humans do not exist for the grimm to prey on yet so this is wholly a quarrel over aesthetics; light wants everything to be lush and tranquil, dark wants a world in endless motion. note how the main point of contention here is just “plate tectonics, yes or no?”)

[…]

“Brother,” said the God of Light one day. “Why do you take pleasure in torturing and destroying my creations?”

The God of Darkness smiled. “You take so much joy in their creation, I merely want you to be able to do more of it.”

[…]

The God of Light wanted his brother to see the world as he did, to comprehend the responsibility that came with their immense power. And so, he made a bold proposal:

“What if we create a new form of life together, one more capable and fascinating than the animals and insects? We can make them aware of what they are, and empower them to control and shape their world.”

The God of Darkness was intrigued. “If they can think and communicate as we do, they won’t be as predictable as the things you’ve made before.”

“There is one condition, Brother,” said the God of Light. “If we create these beings together, then we must share in any decisions about their fate. You must promise not to wipe them out on a whim; they must have the chance to find their own destiny and rule or ruin this world we have made for them.”

[…]

For a time, the brothers were satisfied with what they had made together and they watched Humanity adapt and flourish. People spread across the planet, and if the God of Darkness occasionally tossed adversity their way in the form of natural disasters like a flood or tornado, the God of Light then blessed them with bountiful harvests and fair weather.

The God of Darkness was interested in testing the Humans’ limits and admired their resourcefulness. Following a devastating earthquake, rather than give in to despair and accept failure, Humans rebuilt their homes—stronger than before, so they would survive the next quake. And though they grieved their lost loved ones, they picked up and pressed on. The God of Light underestimated the Humans, overprotective of their creations, but the God of Darkness saw how they thrived in facing challenges and grew in overcoming them.

[…]

“Your abominations [grimm] are killing the Humans,” the God of Light told his brother. “Get rid of them.”

“You protested whenever I wiped out your creations, but now you want to do the same to mine?” the God of Darkness snapped.

“Your creatures are not alive. They are crafted from malice and hate, with the sole purpose of destroying all that is good in the world.”

The God of Darkness scowled. “Is that what you think of me, Brother? Never forget: You and I are the same.”

with the context provided by 9.10 it is very easy to trace the lines of this conflict all the way back to its source: dark ate and light did not. dark understands destruction as a natural and essential part of life that brings healing, nourishment, and revival; light misunderstands it as something his brother did to get rid of bad things and he cannot wrap his head around why dark refused to get rid of jabber (a bad thing) OR why dark keeps adding destructive things into their new world (which, having been created ex nihilo, does not have a primordial wilderness for dark to clear).

to him this seems arbitrary, pointless, and cruel; meanwhile dark looks at light’s creative efforts and sees an egg that could hatch into something wonderful if only the shell would crack. and then once he’s added a beak here and some talons there and has the newly-hatched chick cradled in his hands, light accuses him of ruining the egg and he can no more understand why his brother is so upset about that than light can understand why dark keeps doing this.

the cherry on top of the irreconcilable differences sundae is that light thinks erasing jabber or the grimm from existence is exactly the same as, say, breaking up the planetary crust before spinning the world like a top. but to dark these are profoundly different—one is death, the other a renewal. a forest burnt to the ground by wildfire erupts with new life again; a town flattened by a terrible earthquake is rebuilt stronger and with more care, to survive the next quake unscathed. this is ascension! this is the pattern they have known and cherished all their lives, adapted for a different environment; an old song in a new key!

and the longer this fundamental difference in perspective goes unresolved the more impossible it becomes to find any common ground at all in the conflict arising from it. when we meet them in 6.3 they have been in the trenches of this ideological stalemate for so long that it’s devolved to dark spitting that creation is his nature just as it is light’s and light responding flatly that no it isn’t. it’s gotten to the point of “you don’t own creation, you don’t own humans, and you don’t own me” and the answer being, basically, “well i’m right, you’re wrong, and that human tricked you into breaking the rules because she’s bad and needs to be punished.”

it’s gone on for so long and grown so large that in a very real way it’s mutated into a fight about whether or not dark is an evil monster who needs to be restrained lest his malice bring the world to ruin, and while i don’t think light would describe it that way it seems very clear to me that dark has grasped this. as i said in the original post, resurrecting a virtuous hero who died in the prime of his life, at the request of his devastated, grieving lover, without any conditions at all, for no other reason than because it pleased him to be kind, is as clear and unambiguous a proof of the value dark sees in life, in love, and in creation itself as dark could ever make—and it changes nothing. it completes the circle and the original fight begins again, exactly as before. dark recognizes this as it happens and immediately capitulates, immediately takes full responsibility, apologizes, and corrects his ‘mistake’—and it changes nothing. light still lunges at salem, to punish her for what dark did.

so, either dark lashed out at salem in a petty rage because he believed light’s insinuation that she sought to manipulate him (which does not, in retrospect, make sense, because it’s preceded by dark folding into himself, getting very quiet, and apologizing to his brother, at whom he was screaming furiously not a minute before; he doesn’t seem outraged or indignant, and he really has no reason to take light at his word)—or, he saw what was happening and backed down so as to prevent light from trying to solve the problem by killing salem, a la jabber.

only that didn’t work, because nothing dark does actually matters anymore. dark can bring a legendary hero back to life as an act of kindness toward his bereaved lover and his brother will see only an abomination in need of stern correction; he can bow his head, humbly apologize, assume full responsibility, and undo the act that provoked his brother, and light will still condemn the innocent mortal caught in the middle.

there’s nothing dark can do, at this point. he can bash his head against an unsolvable conflict for the rest of forever while his brother flatly refuses to move a single nanometer away from his original position that destruction is acceptable only within a very narrow, strictly-defined set of parameters (clearing away the primordial wilderness of the ever after to set the stage for light’s design) but aberrant and unworthy to exist in any other context because it incites change and change is anathema; or he can walk away and be free.

except he can’t walk away, because this world and humans in particular are very dear to him. light is cold and unyielding and punitive enough as it is; how much worse would he become without dark around to keep the world changing and growing? look at what light did to salem in retaliation for dark merely granting her request and then walking it back to appease his brother!—how dire might the consequences be for humankind if dark chose to upend the balance by leaving?

these are rhetorical questions; the answer is that light resorts to demanding absolute obedience or else he’ll vaporize the planet. because that’s the ultimatum he gives ozma, without dark.

so dark, if his goal is to leave remnant, has to make sure that light leaves too. how?

(tin hats on!)

here’s something sticky i’ve been chewing on: light bites jabber and shatters him and then the blacksmith skips ahead to their departure, right. we don’t see dark putting jabber back together again, but we do know he ultimately was left alive, and we can infer that dark fixed him up one last time before they left.

light bites salem, too. the sound cuts out and the screen cuts to black for a couple seconds. then she jolts awake, unharmed, falling from the sky above light’s domain. absent the jabber parallel, it made intuitive sense to conclude that light snapped her up without actually harming her, flashed back to his domain, and then dropped her.

but the jabber parallel underscores the physicality of light’s violence: he rends jabber to pieces with his claws, he shatters jabber with a snap of his jaws. (beware the jabberwock, my son!/the jaws that bite, the claws that catch!) lunging down to bite is one of the ways light executed jabber—so when he lunges down to bite salem…?

dark is cut completely out of frame throughout the whole sequence of salem’s reaction to losing ozma for the third time. he breathes a blast of fire to engulf them and then we do not see him again until after salem is made immortal. this is a very overt implication that light made his choice to retaliate unilaterally; and given that only a minute prior, dark makes a deliberate point of leaving salem unharmed, it seems self-evident that dark did not want to kill her.

and of course this occurs mere minutes after it’s established that dark can bring people back even when light is the one who killed them.

and,

“If we create these beings together, then we must share in any decisions about their fate. You must promise not to wipe them out on a whim; they must have the chance to find their own destiny and rule or ruin this world we have made for them.”

if ‘the two brothers’ is accurate in the essentials of what “the rules we agreed upon” entailed, and light killed salem without consulting dark, and dark did not retroactively approve that decision, then light violated the rules and dark has every right to demand that salem be revived and allowed to decide her fate. if light insists upon punishment, it must be a punishment dark will agree to.

and light’s rigid absolutism demands that he obey the rules, too. he might stretch his interpretation of them to rationalize doing things that are not in the spirit of the rules, but he won’t break them.

so, who dropped salem into the fountain life and creation? here’s some pernicious little oddities that have been taunting me for a year that now seem… suggestive:

number one: after salem finishes coughing up water and realizes where she is, she sits up and, while light chides her for being selfish and arrogant, turns her head away from him to stare at dark. she is looking at dark, not light, when she asks “what did you do to me?”

number two: this fucking split screen. light is above his brother at the top of the shot but dark is ascendant, and once their relative positions have reversed dark’s half rapidly fades out to reveal salem (and both of them are shown whole, so their heads overlap light as well). the symbolism here couldn’t be louder if you gave it a bullhorn; salem’s immortality is the ending of light’s divine rule but a victory for dark, who rises (ascends!) from his inferior position beneath light and promptly vanishes, leaving salem to take his place.

number three: before the split screen, when salem is on the ground, the tree is center frame. after the split screen, she stands up, which—because she was sprawled perpendicular to the camera, so to be clear this is not an animation error—moves her a little to the left, which in turn has the effect of moving the tree off-center as the camera moves with her. look. LOOK at how this changes the composition of the shot!

centered. symmetrical. salem lies at the roots of the tree and the brothers are both sheltered by its crown but apart from it. (you can also see how her head is turned toward dark here)

off-center. lopsided. salem is still under the roots but her prominence in the shot is much greater; she completely fills the space between the brothers and they now seem small by comparison. the tree has moved away from light, who is now fully alienated from it—no part of him touches it—and dark has moved toward it and into it. his apparent ‘movement’ from the previous shot to this one is a descent from the high branches, following the trunk down, toward the bottom. (afterans ascend by diving to the roots of the tree and then rising up to blossom from its crown.)

these two shots bracket the split screen and directly reiterate that symbolism: light is removed from the seat of his power (and symbolically alienated from the cosmic tree) and dark gains the advantage, but salem has become a formidable barrier between them which, with the context v9 supplies, gives dark what he needs to be able to return to the tree.

and as a final point of interest, light tells salem that she must learn the importance of life and death before she can rest, and, well, that’s an eyebrow-raising turn of phrase, isn’t it:

“I will give them knowledge of themselves and their world,” said the God of Darkness. “So they can comprehend life and death, and thus they will also know fear.”

The God of Light said, “And I will give them free will, the power to decide what to do with that knowledge and choose their own place in the world.”

do you see? do you SEE? dark used light’s desire for retribution to guide him to this outcome, and he made salem immortal to make salem his heir.

more opaque is the question of to what degree dark anticipated salem going as far as she did, but i do think his characterization in ‘the two brothers’ is elucidating here:

The God of Darkness was interested in testing the Humans’ limits and admired their resourcefulness. Following a devastating earthquake, rather than give in to despair and accept failure, Humans rebuilt their homes—stronger than before, so they would survive the next quake. And though they grieved their lost loved ones, they picked up and pressed on. […] the God of Darkness saw how they thrived in facing challenges and grew in overcoming them.

dark sees in humans a cycle of growth and continual refinement through adversity. he delights in this and is “endlessly fascinated” by the human will to adapt and survive. he doesn’t allow hardships to befall humans to be cruel, but rather to galvanize them to achieve their full potential—and so where light curses salem with eternal pain as retribution for her “arrogance,” dark likely intended immortality as the furnace that would forge her into what he hoped she could become.

“the gods hoped that salem would learn from her eternal curse, and she did. she learned that the hearts of men are easily swayed.” she learned that the gods are fallible. she learned that light is cruel. she learned that humans do not need the brothers and that the brothers do not own them. she learned that humans, too, have a claim on the powers of creation and a choice in their own fate.

dark gave humans knowledge.

one of the brothers wanted salem to learn her lesson and return humbled and contrite; the other wanted to disabuse her of her faith in them and provoke defiance, and he got what he wanted in spades.

“my own gift to them, used against me.” / “you thought there was no greater punishment we could bestow upon you?” / “still demanding things of your creators.” these are the last things dark says to salem—his parting words—and it’s you cannot overcome us with the weapon i lent to you. you cannot overestimate our cruelty. you failed because you expected us to solve your problems for you. is he mocking her inferiority or is he telling her DO IT YOURSELF FOR THE WORLD IS YOURS

and then he shatters the moon and fire rains down, and he freezes the debris forever so that the violence of his departure will never, ever be forgotten. salem curses the gods and the universe and everything but herself as she wanders the planet waiting for a death that would never come—passively suffering in the last helpless vestiges of her faith—until fate leads her back to the land of darkness and she takes fate into her own hands.

look at this. LOOK at what dark did to the moon,

and look what it became after salem hurled herself through its reflection into the pool of grimm!

it isn’t mended but it’s been made whole. by salem when she rejected the fate inflicted upon her and recreated herself.

“it created a being of infinite life with a desire for pure destruction, and in time, she would find her adversary.” and it’s not ozma, and it’s not ruby standing behind ozma, and it’s not weiss or yang or blake revealed by ozma’s aimless wander through the white void. it’s light, who breaks the silence by saying ozma’s name and reveals himself like this:

i can’t add a screenshot because i’ve hit the image limit but the way light is positioned here directly repeats and exaggerates the serpentine motion of his lunge at salem and these are the only two shots in the lost fable where his draconic head is shown from the front rather than in profile.

and note the repetition here of this composition.

light delivers his ultimatum alone, standing in the place of the tree, against a backdrop of the white emptiness beneath the ever after. in the absence of his brother he maintains the circle alone, re-enacting their conflict and creation of the world by himself, unchanging, forever. remember how i said that nothing dark did actually mattered anymore? this is the proof.

dark is GONE, and light carries on trying to win their fight millions of years after his brother washed his hands of it and walked away.

“in our absence, i would like to offer you a chance to return” / “creation, destruction, choice and knowledge were the ideals upon which humanity was made. now, i leave them behind with the hope that you can learn to remake yourselves.” he tells ozma that if brought together, “these relics will summon my brother and me back to your world, and mankind will be judged.”—but he makes it explicitly clear that he is acting alone. he says i, not we, leave these relics behind. i, not we, have chosen you. dark has no part in this.

if dark still exists as before, then light is violating his own rules by acting unilaterally—and he has no reason to believe that dark will answer the relics’ summons or participate in a day of judgment he did not agree to and may not even know about.

if, on the other hand, dark left remnant and ascended…

well. um.

Finally, overcome with loneliness, the dragon decided to create a companion with whom he could share the cosmos and eternity—an equal, fashioned in his own image. Because even an all-powerful god cannot make something from nothing, the dragon divided himself and all his magic into two halves.

However, he destroyed himself in the act of creation. The old god was no more; in his place were two brothers, a dragon of pure light, and his shadow, a dragon of unfathomable darkness. They were new gods with shared memories and complementary abilities.

we have hard confirmation now that this part of ‘the two brothers’ is not literal truth, so where did it come from and why is it here?

the dragon divides himself and his power into new gods with shared memories of complementary abilities. something cannot come from nothing, and so in order to create himself in this new form, equals fashioned in his own image, he must destroy himself. this is a description of ascension which introduces the possibility of a god destroying himself in order to be reborn as multiple new beings.

dark is gone. he left remnant behind and we have not seen him since; light delivers his ultimatum alone.

there are four relics now, each inhabited by one of the spirits of destruction, creation, knowledge, and choice—the four qualities that defined the brothers and defined humanity in turn.

these spirits are shackled and wrapped in chains. the two we’ve met so far palpably dislike ozma.

and light, who has never ascended, who does not understand the role destruction plays in creation, who abhors change, believes that when these relics are united, his brother will return.

they’re the dragon divided. into four, not two, because dark understood that balance is not two forces locked in eternal conflict and understood his own nature to be more than a false dichotomy.

#TLDR HE BROKE THE MOON SO SALEM COULD FIX IT #SEE ALSO ‘GIFT OF THE MOON’

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gerardwayissexah · 1 year ago

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GerardWayisSexah's WIP Wednesday:

Back when I started writing my longfic, that story was all I could think about. I couldn't imagine being one of those fanfic writers with 10 WIPs going at once. Now, I'm not quite at 10 yet, but...I could easily get there. I'm not even counting all the half-baked ideas floating in my brain. If any of these strike your interest, feel free to message or send me an ask about them. :)

Here's a summary:

To Unbury a Heart (Ten-ten x Hiashi Hyuga) - 16k words [Completely written/ready to edit and post]

Freefall (NSFW Neji x Ten-ten) - 13k words [~60% written]

Pity the Woman (OC-centric, branch Hyuga watches Neji v. Naruto in Chunin Exams) - 2.5k words [~50% written]

Of Dreams Deferred (Neji lives and becomes clan head AU) - 71k words [~80% written]

(More in-depth rambling below the cut)

Completely written/ready to edit and post:

To Unbury a Heart (Ten-ten x Hiashi Hyuga)

Words: 16k

Yes, you read correctly. I wrote a Ten-ten x Hiashi Hyuga fanfiction and it's not crack. This one's inspired by the platonic Ten-ten and Hiashi found family dynamics I included in two of my NejiTen Month pieces. In this particular non-Boruto compliant AU, Ten-ten and Neji conceive a son before he dies in the war. Hiashi and Ten-ten raise the kid together, and Hiashi slowly but surely falls in love with her. However, because of his guilt over his past wrongs, he doesn't feel like he deserves her (even if she's ready to accept him).

Currently writing on and off:

Freefall (NSFW Neji x Ten-ten)

Words: 13k so far

I read a fic a while back in which Neji wants to sterilize himself so he doesn't perpetuate the Hyuga line. When I paused to consider his character, I realized it made sense that he wouldn't want to have children considering how much he resents his fate. Of course, my degenerate mind immediately thought of NSFW implications. As one does. In this fic, Neji swears at a young age (really, when he first learns about sex) that he won't ever sleep with a woman. Like Jon Snow from Game of Thrones, he doesn't want to risk making a child who'll suffer in the same ways he has.

Once he's assigned a team with Ten-ten, Neji starts falling for her though he denies his feelings, and Ten-ten has a boyfriend. Things begin to escalate between them once Ten-ten's boyfriend dumps her, and the Water Prison Incident makes it impossible for Neji to deny how he feels. And he also finds that keeping his promise to himself gets harder...and harder. (I'll refrain from making the obvious joke here).

Pity the Woman (OC-centric)

Words: 2.5k so far

I thought it would be interesting to explore how a rank-and-file branch loyal Hyuga views Neji v. Naruto in the Chunin Exams. I've hit a little bit of a roadblock with this story, since I need to watch the fight to get the dialogue and sequence of events right. Not sure how many of you have read "Bird in a Gilded Cage," but if you have, this fic will delve a bit deeper into Risa Hyuga's character and backstory. Knowledge of that particular story is absolutely not necessary to understand what's going on, though. I've had this fic in my head since last year (!) so getting it all out feels intensely gratifying.

Of Dreams Deferred (Neji becomes clan head - Neji x Ten-ten, Neji x Hyuga OC, Ten-ten x Rock Lee)

Words: 71k so far

This fic is very loosely inspired by "Precious Things," a Neji x Ten-ten fic on Fanfiction.net that was sadly discontinued 10 years ago. By loosely inspired, I mean that - I borrow a few elements (Neji getting embroiled in Hyuga politics, Neji and Ten-ten have an illegitimate child) from that fic, but otherwise go in my own direction. Twelve years before the story's start, Neji and Ten-ten break up so he can pursue his ambition of leading the Hyuga to reform the clan's ways. Marrying a non-Hyuga would compromise his legitimacy, when a former branch Hyuga leading the clan is already considered questionable. However, Ten-ten was pregnant at the time they broke up, unknown to both of them.

Their son grows up believing he's Rock Lee's son, while Neji marries a Hyuga woman for political reasons. Then when the kid is 12, he activates the Byakugan in a moment of panic, which raises some obvious questions (like, who's his actual father?). This brings Neji and Ten-ten back together, and they both start to have second thoughts about the paths they've taken in life. There's also a friendship/sibling relationship between Neji's legitimate daughter and his son with Ten-ten. A lot more goes on in the story, so I can't handily explain it all here.

#nejiten #naruto fanfiction #wip wednesday #tenten #hyuga neji #naruto original character #neji x oc #my fanfic writing #Lots of self-indulgent rambling here #tenten x hiashi hyuga #yes you read that right

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prismaticaurene · 1 year ago

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There is also a small group of spirits that are revered with great sorrow. These "lost" Spirits of the Wild remained behind to fight Jormag. Owl, Dolyak (also known as Ox), Eagle, and Wolverine are lauded for their bravery and their sacrifice. Owl's death is known to the norn—the last Havroun of Owl confirmed it—but as to the final outcome of Dolyak, Eagle, and Wolverine, even the shamans do not know. No norn has been blessed to serve as havroun to those spirits in generations, but then, it is not uncommon for weaker spirits (or those who are not close to this world) to be without a havroun. All that is truly known is that these spirits held the line in the far North and, by their bravery, aided the norn in escaping Jormag's claws. A Spirit of Legend - Ree Soesbee.

Ox, Eagle, and Wolverine are dead. This is both common sense and widely accepted by most any norn. This is also a fact that Sigyn couldn't believe. The Mists, after all, were not that simple. There had to be information somewhere about what happened. Not to mention that the lost spirits were far from minor ones-- with people still praying to them even after their loss-- by all rights, they shouldnt be able to simply die. The logic, of course, would fall apart once it was better known that Dragons consume magic. But it would be a few years yet before Gorr's findings would be leaked. At 16, Sigyn Weibesdottir was clever, celebrated as the Slayer of Issomir, and hubristic beyond a fault.

Because she is hubristic and frankly stupid, she reverse engineers the ritual that her father as Raven's Havroun uses to step into the Mists to find the truth. And she does, sinking into primal dragonic magic of frost left behind by the foul workings of Svanir's 'chosen' when they kidnapped Havroun Solvi, and staring into the Abyss-- which of course--stares back. "Arent you a curious one? So young and bold. I can give you what you seek. What you want." Sharp talons dig deep and drag her back, but the damage is already done, and countless Sons of Svanir balk at the realization that Hoelbrak houses a woman bearing the scars of Jormag's corruption across her face. It's less than three days before the first attempt at killing her. Less than a month before she's exiled from Hoelbrak itself. (Less than a moment at seeing her newly warped and broken transformation from Norn to something else and realizing the truth-- that Ox, Eagle, and Wolverine are not dead at all. And less than a moment after that to realize that no matter the truth, no one will believe her. What good would it do, after all? Even with the proof of her talons, horns, and claws-- Corruption could not be purged. It would be better-- kinder, to believe them dead. ) [CLICK] SIGYN: The Order of Whispers-- in the end-- didn't care about my scars as long as I wasn't compromised. If anything, they were impressed that I wasn't corrupted where it counted. TAFFI: Did you tell them? About your spirits? SIGYN: No, but I suspect they had their own thoughts on it all. TAFFI: What now then? Are you just going to pretend you don't know?

SIGYN: Jormag plays the long game. Revealing a handful of their cards now would have done nothing, when their deck is stacked in their favour. While Drakkar lives– and trust me, that won’t be forever, we cannot yet truly challenge the Dragon. Instead, the few of us that remain will watch. And Wait.

[CLICK. RECORDING ENDS]

#gw2 #gw2 fan submission #guild wars 2 #sigyn frostseer

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ffxivaltaholic · 1 year ago

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Prompt #11: Once Bitten, Twice Shy

FFxivWrite2023

"So that's it then? You're hanging up your sword?" Rarely did the gentle giant of a Knight raise his voice, but Roland was at his wits end with his sulking friend. They had spent the last few hours in a heated argument, so much so even the maid would not dare enter, even to offer them a warm drink or a meal.

"I... I don't know alright? By Halone's fury Roland, we're the only ones who survived!" He was pacing as much as his injured body would allow. "What if I go out there and I screw it up again? What if more people die because I missed something?"

Silence permeated the room.

"It wasn't your fault. No one saw the dragons descend through the snow storm." Roland's tone softened and he finally took a seat, resting his head in his hands. "Regardless of who was on watch, it would have ended the same." It felt like a broken record going around and around, and yet he was making no headway on the subject.

"Please... Don't walk away, not after everything..." Running a hand through his blonde hair, Roland glanced up as he heard his friend cease pacing. "It's okay to be afraid... And it's okay to feel angry and hurt, but you can't let it win. Giving up just means they died for nothing Tsirae." Staring at his raven-haired friend, practically a brother after all these years, he couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt at the look in the young Knight's eyes, normally so warm and now icy cold. Perhaps the trauma was still to great, the wounds still to fresh.

"I'm sorry... Perhaps I have been out of line..." Despite having survived the same ordeal, he didn't end up in the maw of a dragon and nearly exsanguinated in the snow as Tsirae had. Were it not for the old stone wall having fallen in such a way as to protect him from the onslaught, there was a very good chance the Captain would have perished like the rest of his squad.

Once again silence between them.

Finally after a minute of nothing but the crackle of the fire his soft voice broke through. "I do not know if I would be more of a liability than an asset in battle... What if I freeze up? Fail again? How many more lives can be on my shoulders...?" Tsirae lowered his gaze to the floor, emerald eyes vacant and glossing over. He looked utterly exhausted, but continued to persist with the argument rather than rest.

"At lease sleep on it... Do not make any rash decisions on exhausted emotions. That's all I ask." It was a fair request to make, and Tsirae couldn't deny his closest friend that. "Fine..." He caved and the blonde Elezen visibly relaxed his shoulders, clearly relieved to have some compromise. "Thank you... Now perhaps it would be a valuable use of our time to go home and get some rest?" Pushing himself up from the chair, Roland fetched his coat in order to exit into the frigid night air of Ishgard. At the door he paused and glanced back, finding his friend standing by the fire a little longer. "Go home, see Rheyla, she's been worried about you, and please consider my words..." "Please don't give up. Come back stronger. If not for yourself... Do it for them."

#ffxivwrite2023 #Tsirae Dariustel #Knight of Ishgard #It was a tough life lesson #he still struggles with the survivors guilt of it #In the end he did come back #and he fought right to the end of the dragonsong war

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ink-fireplace-coffee · 3 years ago

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okay, I'm really curious and I wanna know more about YASH. Do you have any Lore figured out for why people have powers? I mean, I read about the c-12 mutation, but why does a certain person get a certain power? Is it random? Or does it just happen. Why did Thira decide to become a therapist? How did she wind up doing it for people with powers? Was that always her plan? Why did the RSD choose her/how did they hear of her? And what about the RSD: are they actually "good guys" or are they trying to manipulate the heroes? What does the RSD think about the villains? (Do they need to die, or can they be "fixed"?)

Sorry for the massive spam of questions, but I'm v. curious about this story!! Stories revolving around superpowers are some of my favorites, because I really love the morality that gets pulled into all of it!! Seeing that morality was listed as one of the themes for YASH made me even more excited, not to mention positive portrayal of mental health stuff.

~ Morri 🗡(@memento-morri-writes)

oh my god I tried to resist the impulse to answer this ask when my exams were done BUT I can't soooo

thanks for asking Morri, and I hope you enjoy ranting hahaha

1. Im being completely shameless right now: the C-12 mutation comes from two different branches: one is My Hero Academia and the other is yours truly.

In case you are not familiar with My Hero Academia, people get their powers bc of an evolution of the species that leaves them without a tiny bone in one of the foot fingers (yes, so random).

Then there's my own thing: I have a genetic mutation called Factor 12 deficit or Hageman deficit and since last year more or less my whole live has gotten a but compromised about it? so I thought thst I might as well use it for something cool and give it abilities and powers (instead of you know playing Russian roulette everytime I get in a plane). The C part comes from Carmen bc I'm not original 👍🏻

Since the C-12 is a genetic mutation then you will get like this "families" or "blood lines" of people with abilities that have been increasing since it all started, and it's pretty weird for someone to not have the mutation but, of course, those people exist since genes don't usually work a 100% of the times (thanks, Mendel). Of course you have more chances of getting abilities if your parents have a higher percentage of the mutation themselves.

Now the type of ability is not in any way determined by whatever your parents have or don't. Usually it's a little of nature and nurture thing (so maybe if a pregnant person spends a lot of time by the sea, their child will have some kind of chances that their power has sth to do with the sea, but that's not "a given", there's always a lot of luck involved).

Another theory is more "mystical" and I like to call it The Zodiac Theory, because, as you might guess, it bases on the hypotheses that depending on the date, time and places you've born you will have one ability of another.

(this hypothesis does not explain however how pairs of twins do not have the same exact abilities, but it's a fun theory to have and has its lore like the zodiacs have irl. believe it or not is up to whoever at the end of the day)

2. Thira is what people in Clarelmar know as a Casualty Child: a child that has lost one or both paternal figures due to a major crisis (read a superhero battle) and she was in the system for the next eight years. She decided that, because there was nothing super about her, this was the only way she could help other kids and people who lost everything like her. It also impacted the fact that she experienced first hand a hero crying and being absolutely heartbroken once and, after talking to him, she discovered that heroes didn't have no one who could help them. So why couldn't she be the first? She vowed to the hero that she would find the way and, years later, the veteran found that Thira had graduated and opened her own clinic, and that was enough to put her in the RSD radar.

3. Ahh the RSD... they are interesting for sure. I do not think they manipulate heroes but more than the RSD are the heroes bosses in a way? Like just look at the name of the heroes' team: The Soldiers. think of them as pawns or minions who do the hard work and the RSD control the whole "this is legal" / "we will defend then from people trying to sue them for damages etc" and also the RSD has different areas of their work, not only the superheroes part: they also include social services for the Casuality Children, lawyers, indemnities, reconstruction plans and workers etc.

Villains can be "fixed" according to the RSD but usually when they are trapped these people prefer to uhh sacrifice themselves, which is why every once in a while there's a new completely different group of troublemakers (so in this case they are called The Hunters). Usually captured villains would get through jail and loads of "therapy" but (also) usually villains are those who the RSD let down years ago and the just seek revenge.

now the funny thing from yash is that even though morality is a big part of it I am going to blur so much the lines in between good and bad that my goal is that people don't see anyone as a Villain or Hero but just as a character with their own ideas (and problems). Also is your enemy still your enemy if you both work towards the same goal? it'll be nice to see how my set of misfits have to put aside their differences when sth else happens >:)

mental health has a lot to do bc as a psychology obsessed girl I just have to include it everywhere.... Also yash was my excuse to study psychopathology so I'm applying what I've learn to my characters but also doing research bc I'm neurotypical and I am in no way entitled to speak without listening and learning <3

this was very fun to answer and I love that you were curious!!!

#wip: yash #you are safe here #morri friend🗡️

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book-o-scams · 4 years ago

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Ed, Edd n Eddy Series Bible (1996) -Analysis-

You can all finally read/download Ed, Edd n Eddy's official Series Bible right here! Thanks again to Chuckletons for sharing this with me and to Joey/Kongiscool0518 for sharing it in the first place, the Holy Grail of lost Ed, Edd n Eddy trivia!

One of the first posts I made for this blog was the Series Bible page. It was a composite of every source we had ever seen reference the series bible so far-- storyboarders in interviews, CN's old character guides, and the biggest source, an old CN UK posting about the show. Well, I figure now that we have the official source, I better update the old page (so everyone knows it's out of date), and make this new Series Bible post using the official source! Not much new information, but I was intrigued to finally learn the true phrasings of some things we had only heard paraphrased, as well as at least one detail from the movie that I couldn't believe came up this early in conception...

Unfortunately, Tumblr has apparently updated its post system to only let me add 10 images? Gonna try and only use images for what I need since you can read the actual document above, I guess I'll transcribe it too for easier reference and so we don't ever lose some archive of this.

Quickly, let's review what a series bible is:

A series bible is how creators pitch shows to networks. They can be called “pitch bibles” as well. Bibles do not usually get posted publicly, because they are initially under a strict Non-Disclosure Agreement by the network; also the creator may simply not wish to share it because it reflects the earliest stages of development.

The pitch materials typically include early concepts for characters, locations and episodes. Sometimes it exposes secrets, in this case, Ed and Eddy’s home lives, and sometimes the stuff in it is completely abandoned because it’s so early in production, in this case, casual references to school and adults.

Alright, everybody, it's time to gather 'round and read the Ed, Edd n Eddy Bible!

THE YEAR IS 1996.

YOUR NAME IS LINDA SIMENSKY. YOU WORK AT CARTOON NETWORK. A FRIEND OF YOURS, DANNY ANTONUCCI, IS WRAPPING UP A SHOW ON MTV. YOU GET THIS FAX.

Linda Simensky immediately fell in love with this concept because as a child, she was best friends with 2 other Lindas for seemingly no reason other than the shared name.

I love how Danny decided last second to pencil in the correct names over each Ed, since they're arranged out of title-order.

"They're friends because they have the same name."

-the Logline for the series.

Fun fact: one storyboard artist for the movie observed that the movie is essentially all about challenging the series' original notion that the Eds are friends ONLY because of their name.

"A Danny Antonucci Cartuna"

-the label Danny used to use under announcements of new productions.

PAGE 1:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

They're best friends because they have the same name.

A gag laden, beat generated CARTOON bumper car ride of 3 misfit youths on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America.

Through summer vacation, part-time jobs, or just hang'n out at the corner mail box, they want to belong....but CAN'T.

From home chores, helping neighbors or eating jaw breakers, they want to fit in...but CAN'T.

Ed is into "B" monster movies, model kits and is quick to break out into rashes.

Lots of luck...

Edd is into chemistry, biology and prone to crushes.

Later...

Eddy is into pranks, is stylish and flaunts himself to the world.

Ya Right...

Ed, Edd n Eddy is a show about confusion and contradiction, that awkward part of youth, pimples, big feet, oily hair and... girls???.

Puberty is unforgiving.

I was fascinated by the lack of art on this page, it makes the pitch feel very focused. AKA logo in the corner, the title logo again up top, then the logline appears again below.

I really love the breakdown of Danny's vision of the show. "Gag-laden, beat-generated, CARTOON bumper ride." Very accurate, and I think "beat-generated" is the phrase that interests me the most. I typically think of "animation beats" as sort of a give-in-- technically all things fit a rhythm, so all stories are essentially just a montage of beats. But this does make me realize how important the strength of the beats and their rhythm are to the pacing of a cartoon and making you feel like "that was a good one." I feel like the "seasonal rot" viewers feel over the course of a show, and the way that perception differs from person to person, depends on the type of beats you want. Even though I am very into the experimental beats of a show in its later seasons, I can definitely see how season 1's beats are more typically appealing to a wide-audience, and how important a focus on that is to the longevity of a show.

I found it really interesting how the scams are initially conceived of here as "summer jobs." It adds to the sense that adults were originally meant to be present. Honestly a little surprised nobody with access to this bible had ever thought to mention that-- scams are not referenced ANYWHERE. Their image in the Series Bible is that they have summer jobs and help neighbors, which is certainly a much cleaner reputation than the Eds ended up with in the show. Makes me realize though, were some of the early scams, like Ed's Hive Bee Gone and their newspaper routes, supposed to be leaning into this early idea of them with almost legit jobs for unseen adults?

I was very amused by the repeated phrase that the Eds simply CAN'T fit in.

Loved to finally see the official phrasing for the confirmation that Peach Creek is in America. Not much different than I was led to believe, but still nice to have the true quote.

Also love Eddy being described as "stylish and flaunting himself to the world." The bold-print reactions to each micro-description is a cute idea too, I truly wonder who we were meant to picture saying those things in reaction. Each Ed? Kevin?

The "corner mail box" is an oddly specific phrase-- the Eds do hang around mailboxes throughout the series, especially seasons 1-3, and I believe the canon map does have a corner mailbox, but the idea that the Eds hang out at one specific mailbox went the way of Bro's supposed secret treehouses.

PAGE 2:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

Show Description

Gag laden. True cartoon style, inventive, non parody, fast paced, stretch and squash

Beat driven. (even when characters stop they hold with a bounce cycle. Adults never bounce. Music can play important part, not just fill.) But not a musical.

Cartoon surrealism. (viewers see the show as Ed, Edd n Eddy would, less important things tend to blend into the background, while objects of Ed, Edd n Eddy's desires are focused. Premise driven.)

The school year's over, (yeah!!!!) and the long HOT summer vacation begins (gulp). What to do?

Stuck on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America is the last place you want to spend summer break, especially when you find life confusing and contradicting.

Ed, Edd n Eddy is about friendship, and serves to remind us that they're no "good ole days," just smelly runners.

You can tackle anything, when your with your pals.

Their days are spent, for knowledge, acceptance and some cash for jaw breakers. Armed with pimples, big feet and oily hair the three amigos trek into the unknown.

Ed, Edd n Eddy are dying to be grown-ups, but they're kids, and attack adulthood as only kids would. Simple situations turn into a manic rollercoaster ride. (Don't forget your barf bag).

They just want to belong, and they're willing to pull off any insane stunt to prove it. First they need to figure out what it is they want to belong to.

Found it interesting that on this page, the show's logo is replaced with the title written in a jumbled font. Seems like the font from the show's end credits.

Hehe, the continued reactions to the descriptions. Allow me to be Double D for a moment and point out the increased use of parentheticals on this page, as well as one wrong "your".

I love Danny's insight that season 1 is framed by the context of how hyped everyone still is just to be out of school, but also the sense of pressure to make use of their break.

I really appreciate Danny getting further into the details of his summary of the show's style on the previous page. It only makes sense that he had this much of a vision that early.

A second confirmation of the cul-de-sac being in America! I'm also really into the repeated focus on the Eds finding the world "contradicting." I always loved how EEnE's inexplicable cartoon antics supported that sense that the Eds are highly aware of contradictions in both societal things and the actual characters.

WOW, so I'm fascinated by this dual reveal. Before the wiggling outlines, which Danny usually calls a "boiling line" and describes as a tribute to wiggling inking in early animation, the series bible instead refers to him wanting the characters to do the iconic Fleischer "bounce," which is a much more commonly recognized rubberhose animation technique. Very interesting that Danny decided not to stick to that. Did it feel too out of place? Or was the overseas team not willing to animate a weight-shifting for every single held pose? Haha, guess I can see why boiling was an easier compromise. I wonder if he had any other ideas for how to make it more of a 1930s cartoon.

The other reveal to me here is that the movie's choice, that adults don't always wiggle in the show, was an idea from the very beginning! I guess I can better understand now why it's just too difficult to communicate a stylistic choice like that overseas-- no point making Bro not wiggle, that'd just create confusion.

Also, really disappointed that my wish for a musical is officially squashed in the series bible itself. That's a tragedy. The show's over, ya couldn't let me dream, Danny!? Conversely, I love Danny's forethought to say "non parody," I definitely noticed and appreciated EEnE's avoidance of derivative parody humor.

My spouse had to point out to me that Danny probably means sneakers here, lol. Canadianisms!

The comments about the Eds wanting to grow up but needing to figure out what they want to belong to are so great and relate to the movie so well. I've heard those comments before, but the correct phrasing was cool to see.

PAGE 3:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Ed in right corner)

Character Description

Attention deficiency syndrome.

He has trouble...

He can't....um...

OK, he draws all day in class.

When Eddy gets a bright idea...Ed's in.

Ed is easily talked into doing Eddy's "hard work". He has great physical strength.

Ed's happiest with his Model kits and B-monster movies. He draws his knowledge from his movies.

Ed smells. Flies are attracted to him.

Ed has sayings for all situations

ED: "you can change your shirt, and Bingo was his name..."

Ed's perpetually a slave to his younger sister's whims and whines.

Ed may have to baby-sit his sister, or let her watch whatever she wants on TV, or let her dress him up in mom's clothes.

Ed breaks out in Rashes. He's allergic to practically everything, especially Guinea Pigs.

Ed's Mom xerox's his sketches and doodles for her therapist.

Ed's Dad hopes to pass on to his son, his knowledge on "pre-owned" auto sales.

Very cute bit wasting the space at the top of the page. Danny seems very invested in Ed's personality already. The old sources we used to have definitely tried to condense these down to simpler blurbs.

Weird how Danny wants to essentially diagnose Ed with ADHD here (phrasing it very poorly, but it was the 90s and... Canada?). I don't know enough on the subject to debate it, but I still gotta point out Ed's canonical cracked skull!

Interested in the comment about Ed being most allergic to Guinea Pigs. I don't think that animal was ever even mentioned in the show. Eddy mentioned an old gerbil once....

Neat to finally have the real phrasing of the official word on Ed's parents! I saw someone comment earlier that this seems to be hinting Ed's Dad is selling stolen cars. I've never thought to question the legality of his apparent second-hand-car dealership (I imagined he works with Eddy's dad, who has received a legitimate award for his salesmanship), but those quotation marks are certainly making Mr. Ed's practices questionable! Best case scenario, Danny meant that more like italics or something, but maybe Ed's dad IS up to no good...

PAGES 4 & 5 (Ed's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 6:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Edd in right corner)

Character Description

Edd

is really smart.

is really quiet.

Edd is unnaturally-- polite.

Edd hasn't been allowed to take gym ever since the Dodge ball incident. He's been excused to free study time in the library.

Edd doesn't like it when people touch his things.

EDD: "You may enter in my room, but don't touch my Lego robot. Thank you."

Edd's learning to play Peddle steel guitar. (his Mom makes him)

Edd's prone to "crushes". Girls in School, in his neighborhood, TV, anatomy books. He mails "true loves" his socks.

Edd is always ready for action, even though he can calculate the implications.

Edd constantly mumbles.

No one ever sees Edd's parents. They both work nights. They communicate to their son solely through Post-it notes. Edd's not allowed to touch anything in the house while they're gone. Anything.

Interesting how Danny slightly differentiates the barely-used space at the top here from Ed's description, to characterize Edd as more quiet and mumbly, adding an awkward "--" mid-sentence, perhaps to create the impression that Edd halts to choose words carefully.

Everything on this page feels familiar, from the character guides and other old sources. The most interesting thing to me here is that Edd's Mom forcing him to practice Pedal Steel Guitar is established this early, don't think I knew that, but I had noticed that it existed in his room from ep 1.

I love how the explanation in the beginning for why Edd goes along with their dumb schemes even though he's smart is basically just "he's always ready for action." ?!? I guess in a way???

That weirdly phrased Edd quote amuses me because it references Lego, just like the original concept background for his room before somebody nixed the copyright-namedrop.

Edd's prone to crushes thing has been reaffirmed over and over in character bios even though it really doesn't come up outside of the cupid magic in HPH and the pilot-episode heart eyes at Sarah that are barely canon. Still, I've always loved the truly disturbing statement that he mails "his true loves his socks" and how that managed to make it into canon with a comic book example, a cel animation example and a digital era example.

PAGES 7 & 8 (Edd's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 9:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Eddy in right corner)

Character Description

Eddy

Exhibitionist.

Megalomaniac. (quote from his report card)

Eddy is the unofficial leader of the trio.

He's always got a plan, a stunt or a weird noise.

Eddy's the "class clown". He loves showing off. He loves being the centre of attention-- no matter how stupid the reason is.

Eddy is the only kid in his grade to have been expelled for aw hole week from school. It was his turn to set up the video for science class. He switched "Our Friend Yeast", for a video he "borrowed" from his parent's room.

Before Eddy's brother went....away, he enlightened Eddy with the "legends" of the neighbourhood. Eddy knows where all the abandoned tree houses are, which sewer pipers are safe to spelunk, and the secret recipe for the "El Mongo Stink Bomb" (it's been in the family for years).

He is the one who is most able to pretend that he knows it all... and doesn't care what anyone else thinks about him.

His genes are working the fastest.

Eddy's Dad is constantly concerned that Eddy may grow up to be a ...figure skater.

Eddy's Mom never believes his little darling was involved in such a heinous act.

Funny choice that Eddy's wasted-top-space is just two one-word descriptions, and allegedly lazily swiped from his negative report card.

Wow, we knew the report card quote and the "Our Friend Yeast" story from the UK show guide, but now we also know Ed's page says that Ed draws in class, and now I realize that Ed and Eddy have series bible school blurbs to match Edd's classic dodgeball incident blurb. Anyway, it's great that Eddy's showed his entire school some sort of sex video his parents have.

Very interested that the phrasing for the Bro/El Mongo Stink Bomb blurb even seems to suggest it's a family recipe. Eddy's Dad did have prankster stuff in his closet in JJJ... did Bro learn his prankster ways from Dad?? The neighborhood's secret tree houses have come up in other descriptions (at best, I'd say this could be related to that creepy shack the Eds found in the woods), but I think it's new info that Eddy personally learned the sewer routes from Bro. Interesting...

Thankfully, I had already heard about the Bible's awkward reference to Eddy being the most pubescent as "his genes are working the fastest," lmao.

Once again the Double D in me comes out to point out that the description of Eddy's Mom seems to switch to the Dad's pronouns.

PAGES 10 & 11 (Eddy's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGES 12-14 (Sarah, Jimmy, Rolf, Jonny, Nazz, and Kevin lineup of all 6, then 2 zoomed in lineups of the first 3 kids and last 3 kids)

(Funfact: the kids' designs were allegedly freelanced to an outside studio, hence why their refined later-season designs are so different from these lizardy starting places, lmao)

PAGE 15: (images of Sarah and Jimmy next to their blurbs)

SARAH

Ed's baby Sister.

It's her way or the Highway.

She has everything done for her, if NOT she'll "make" them do it.

She can be quick to judge.

Whinney.

A tatrum for every occasion.

More than a handful for Ed...or Edd and Eddy.

Thinks Edd is kinda cute.

Wants Eddy to MOVE...to another planet.

JIMMY

Sarah's best friend

He is always playing with girls, boys are just too tough.

He is accident prone, when ever we see him he has a different affliction, ie: band-aids, patches, casts, lumps...etc.

He is very clean.

The Ed's frighten him, "They're such brutes".

I'm surprised how much of the UK guide was accurate to what was really in the bible for them! Also surprised Danny misspelled "whiney" and "tantrum," one right after the other. Is this how Sarah spells them? ...Sorry, Danny, I yam what I yam.

PAGE 16: (images of Rolf and Jonny next to their blurbs)

ROLF

First generation of a landed immigrant family.

Nationality not important.

He's proud of his heritage.

He has peculiar traditions and/or customs.

He eats "weird" things.

He has hair on his back..... "yuck".

He confuses the Ed's to no end.

He confuses the other kids to no end.

JONNY 2x4

He is a wanderer and very inquisitive

From early morning to supper time, he is always outside playing, with his buddy, "Plank".

"Plank" is a wooden board that Jonny drew a face on with a crayon.

Jonny has wonderful conversations with Plank. ...Plank is a piece of wood.

Jonny makes himself very "accessible" to the Ed's.

Found it interesting that Rolf's bio is less clearly phrased than the UK bio set it up to be-- there they made it sound more like he mixes up who the Eds/kids are, here it's unclear whether it means that or (more likely) just means the obvious statement that everyone finds him confusing. If it's that, what a lame hollow bio Rolf got. This kid's based on you Danny, show some of that personal side!

Always loved Jonny's description, his life sounds so cute. Playing outside literally all day. Interesting to have it confirmed that Jonny drew Plank's face, I preferred to think the Eds drew him and sold him to Jonny, but whatever.

"Accessible" has always been an important vague description of Jonny to me. It really only applies to how chummy they could be with him in season 1, but it still sorta applies to his personality throughout the series as well.

PAGE 17: (images of Nazz and Kevin next to their blurbs)

NAZZ

She's cool, calm and assertive.

She is the most matured of the kids, or so she thinks.

She's into make-up and fashion magazines and Boys.

Sarah thinks she's awesome, wants to be just like her when she grows up.

When she enters a scene, all activity stops... boys freeze, they sweat, their hearts beat faster and faster. They lose their ability to talk. When she leaves, they recover and conclude it was something They ate.

She thinks the Ed's are funny.

KEVIN

He is cynical and sarcastic.

He thinks he knows the "routine". That's because he watches "60 Minutes".

It got a big laugh out of me that Kevin's description is only 2 sentences long. Nazz even has a more detailed character description from inception than Kevin. Love this for them.

Who's the Eds' rival? Well, he's cynical, sarcastic and he watches 60 Minutes, doesn't that tell you enough!?

I love the "mature... or so she thinks" remark about Nazz, a grounded flaw for her to have, being a little overcommitted to being mature like Eddy. It also perhaps suggests naiveté that makes it a little more reasonable that they didn't notice they were dumbing her down at the end of the series, but I do think the movie version of her better reflects the Bible's concept.

PAGE 18:

The Other Neighborhood Kids

Lineup of May, Lee and Marie.

The Kanker Sisters

These gals are tough. They bother, bully, provoke and bewilder everyone.

They live in a motor home park on the other side of the Cul-de-sac. The other kids have never been there.

They are proud of their Tammy Faye Baker memorabilia.

Their project "Cooking with Ketchup" closed down their school for a whole week.

No one likes them, especially the Eds.

They are determined to marry the Eds. They want them to do their dishes.

Amused that the Kankers are essentially being labeled backgrounds characters here, the role they mostly fell into in season 5. "Other" neighborhood kids...

I love that the Kankers have a school blurb to match each of the Eds', and that theirs has similar destructive-intentions to Eddy's video premiere story.

I believe all of this was all known from the UK guide as well, but still, neat stuff!

PAGES 19 & 20 (zoomed in Kanker lineup and their height chart with the Eds)

PAGES 21 & 22 (early promo art that used to be on CN's old Eds webpage, the art of the Eds eating jawbreakers at the end of ep 1 with the overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy love JAWBREAKERS!!!", and the art of the Eds all running with overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy see something shiny...."Jiggers." That weird "jiggers" statement at the end was normally edited out and I don't know what it means. Looked it up and it seems to be Chinook jargon (like when Ed said he was "skookum at X's and O's") usually said in the same sense as "CHEESE IT!")

PAGES 23+:

The rest of the pages in that bible download are from a 2004 storyboard test. The storyboard sample "It's Raining Eds," which we've seen some submitted samples of before, interpretations with Ed attempting to fly or chew gum and Edd making radioactive gum, I was surprised to find out the outline is just the original outline for the opening sequence to season 3's 'For Your Eds Only', seemingly Jonny was not written into the original outline (or was excised for easier testing purposes) but Kevin's brief cameo was. Now I wonder if they knew this would be used for a test when they wrote it, and if they would've come up with a less random way to include him if weren't forced to be a concise bit for testing's sake. (Your limit is typically 40 storyboard pages in my experience.)

I also noticed that in the included background references, the anonymous adult neighbor house next door to Ed's is officially just referred to as a "generic house."

My analysis ends here, but be sure to download that sometime and enjoy all the raw storyboard sketches at the end of the document!

#ed edd n eddy #series bible #aka cartoon inc #aka cartoon #discovery #eene news

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downwiththemutantnjnjaturtles · 4 years ago

Text

We Met Within This Screen (chapt. 4)

[Donnie x fem reader]

sfw, chapt. 3, pt. 4 here

Sighing, you set your phone face-down after sending your last text to Bo. What an abrupt end to something that had been so good. You were confused, a little taken aback and honestly sad. You'd thought the two of you were getting along well. Bo was smart, well-spoken, funny, and all around, a really nice person. He listened to your venting and seemed like he had a response to everything. Always, he had some random fact to hit you with whether it was about biology, chemistry, astronomy, language—you weren't sure where he got all his knowledge from. He'd never mentioned school, if he went. He didn't mention a lot about himself, actually.

People come and go, someone had once told you. You guessed that he was one of those passersby, as much as you wanted it to be more.

More?

When had you started thinking that? More what?

You were tempted to pick your phone back up, to check and see if there were any new messages. Not that you could expect much; Bo had been so curt about his exit from your friendship that it was left at his last text, "Again, I'm sorry." You wanted to say something, but what was there to say? It was his decision. A sudden, uncharacteristic, and frankly odd decision, but still, his. Thinking back on it, you tried to remember any instance you might have crossed a line, or maybe said something you shouldn't have. That's what made you open up the messages again, scrolling up and up and looking for anything weird, but finding nothing of the sort. It had all been normal up until when you texted him about the clamor you'd heard outside your apartment building. And then it went flat—he didn't even respond to it, just said his apology and his goodbye before going offline.

You wanted to take your mind off it with a game, but as you looked through your list and saw the one you and him had played together, you knew it was near ruined for you. It just wasn't the same to play alone or with your acquaintances. An otherwise boring game made fun by one particular person, but now it was barely what it used to be.

Unfortunate.

The next morning might have felt more normal if it weren't for the fact that everyone was pretending like it was. For the sake of secrecy from their father. As far as Donnie knew, Splinter still didn't know anything was or had been going on, and he intended to keep it that way, too. He wanted to tell his father, he did, but all he saw coming of that was reprimanding, or at the very least an awkward discussion, and possibly, time in the Hashi. He was already feeling the aftermath of his actions; he didn't need any more. Especially as he checked the messaging app one last time, only to find it empty, aside from her goodbye.

Donnie stood at the kitchen counter, mask off and groggy as usual, scrounging for something to eat. Maybe a cup of coffee (if they had any), which he was looking for when Mikey bounced in. Normally, his brothers would avoid him when he was in one of his "moods". He hadn't a passionate temper like Raph but a slow-brewing one, the kind that festers until it's alleviated or boils over. Cold quiet was his thing.

But Donnie knew why he was here. So did Mikey. He had that familiar glint of mischief in his eye.

There was no coffee, so he settled for some kind of pastry they'd found while looking through the dumpsters. Really, the item was fine—only the packaging and appearance was defective. It was a wonder just how much food grocers wasted over arbitrary reasons, but regardless, he was happy to oblige his secret sweet tooth.

From the corner of his eye he could see Mikey waiting eagerly for him to turn around and regard him. To listen to whatever he was about to talk his ear off with. Their youngest brother was more often than not bright-eyed in the morning, something Donnie's morning fog could not always entertain. He picked at his food at the counter for a moment, mind wandering back to his night and subsequently, the unresolved feelings. Dreadfully unresolved, he groaned inside. And they probably would continue to be, as after sleeping on what had happened the previous night, thinking about her, he realized something that made his face flush. Oh, no.

He froze in his place, suddenly very awake. He looked over his shoulder and found Mikey was distracted rummaging through the food for his own breakfast, and with a faint cringe, tried to sneak out of the kitchen undetected. No way would he admit to Mikey's words on the rooftop that night, the ones that made him flinch with embarrassment. The same ones that bounced around his head despite all attempts to stuff it down. "You like her, bro."

Things involving him could never be simple, could they?

Abandoning his plate, Donnie began tip-toeing out of the room right behind Mikey. His foot hit the leg of a chair and caused a creak—he winced. As he thought, Mikey looked back, "Why are you sneaking around? You didn't finish your breakfast. Can't go on patrol on an empty stomach, dude."

Before Donnie could even answer, he continued in a whisper, "Plus—"

"Whatever it is, Mikey, not now," he cut his brother off, "last night was the end of it, alright? You need to let it go." It sounded harsher than he would have preferred, but he felt the need to drill it into Mikey's skull that it was over, that it was just something he'd have to deal with. There were a lot of things they dealt with despite not liking it. With time, he'd forget—more accurately, be able to ignore— and maybe he could find the same enjoyment in his brothers once again. That sort of friendship. But at the moment, it was ruined for him—he got a taste of something more and it was taken away what felt like second later.

Mikey's face fell. Donnie couldn't stand that, seeing him upset over something he'd said. He had a bit of a soft spot for their youngest, no doubt. Just wasn't always obvious.

"Aren't you afraid you'll regret it?" he asked, voice soft.

Fear was a strong word, but of course Donnie was anxious. It was the thing holding him back from being able to simply compartmentalize everything, to put it in a box and on the metaphorical "deal with this later because it's uncomfortable right now" shelf. Or to deal with it at all, as ignoring his problems with studying and unrelated research and experimentation wasn't exactly prime management. He knew that.

After a while of thought, Donnie was able to give him an answer. "Well…I mean, how could I not be?" he inquired in return before leaning out of the doorway to scan the lair. Everyone was either in their room, the dojo, or there, in the kitchen. Mikey has always made him feel most comfortable, and he was sure that was the case for the other three, just that they had other ways of showing it. He was certainly easy to talk to; if Donnie weren't so careful of his mouth and what came out of it, he could probably spew way more to him than he liked. Mikey could come through sometimes, though, which prompted him to keep going, "It was a big thing for me. We've been disconnected from everything else for so long that it was just...exciting, to get a look into what it's like. Being 'regular', you know?"

Mikey sat down on one of the bar stools, feet idly shuffling against the floor as he folded his arms and rested on them. "You didn't hear it from me, but I'm a little jealous," he said playfully, but Donnie was aware that it was the case. "Maybe I'm pushing you to go after her because I'm trying to live vic–vicrous–v–…"

Donnie smiled, he couldn't help it. "'Vicariously'?" he suggested.

"Yeah! That," Mikey beamed, nodding. "You get what I mean."

"I understand."

The conversation died off soon after as Donnie decided to get breakfast over with and do whatever needed to be done before they left for patrol that night, darkness falling earlier due to the upcoming winter. It wasn't too cold for them to be out yet, though, so that still meant a chilly patrol in the Autumn breeze. He hated the cold.

As Donnie was making himself busy at a circuit board in his lab, he heard the beads in the doorway shift, and to his surprise, Splinter came shuffling in.

"Sensei?"

He put down his soldering iron, spinning around in his chair. "Something the matter?"

Splinter ran his fingers along a shelf on the wall as he wandered by, careful to not disturb any of the items lining it. Beakers, recently-repaired electronic parts, projects put on pause, things that would loathe to be broken.

"There is always something," Splinter replied enigmatically, "I would not be here if that weren't true. Would you agree?"

I'm compromised!

Donnie had a strong but hidden dislike for vague speaking, even if he did it himself sometimes. When spoken to you it's much more bothersome.

Splinter waited for his answer, looking at him expectantly. "Donatello?"

"Yeah, um…yes, I would—I would agree. I suppose. So...what is it again?" Damn his stutter, he couldn't get away with anything, hardly. He was only able to stifle it just enough.

Picking a random pipette on the desk next to Donnie, Splinter studied the green liquid close for a second before his nose twitched, and he put it back down. "You have been very busy lately, it seems. What is it that you work on all day in here? Or are you playing games?"

Donnie's heart thumped. His hand found that particular spot on his neck and began to scratch, and Splinter looked at him dead in the eye. He should have known; there was no hiding anything from their father, he was too good. Stupidly, infuriatingly perceptive. Donnie caught himself scratching that spot and slid his hand away, he hadn't even noticed he was picking at it again. He knows, Mikey told him, I probably look like a guilty idiot right now, I'm—

"I haven't been playing games," Donnie blurted out.

Quizzically, Splinter gestured at the computer screen on the other wall, which had the menu of the game he'd opened up just earlier. Reminiscing over it even though it had been only a couple of days since he and his friend had last played together, but he stared at the screen as if it had been years. It made him realize how easily he'd gotten attached to that. Well, to her. He was on the fence about whether he wanted to try playing again or not and left it on.

Oh, you have to be kidding. I'm a fool in a man's shoes.

Donnie laughed uncomfortably, "You caught me, Sensei," he said, "I guess I have been playing games more often lately."

It was honest enough, right?

Splinter hummed and cupped his hands behind his back. "I see."

Straightening out, Donnie dipped his head a little. "I'll...lay off on them. Sorry for lying. I've just been really distracted recently."

"Liars never prosper, my son. Take care of yourself."

He then left.

So he didn't know. Donnie still couldn't say it with any degree of confidence, because Splinter would trip them up here and there, but it was assurance enough to know that if Splinter was aware of what had gone on between the four brothers and his new—rather, former—human friend, he would have confronted Donnie about it. Or all of them, considering it was now a secret they were all in on actively hiding. And on top of that, Raph and Leo didn't know Mikey was conspiring. Layers and layers, he sighed.

With Splinter gone, he let out a breath of relief. Too close. Much. But, swiftly evaded. A chuckle left him, not of humor, but more because he was actually feeling a little confident. Just a little. They were really hiding something from Splinter; it was reason enough to pat himself on the back, nothing got past Splinter. Except for him.

Briefly, he thought of Mikey's outlandish idea as he spun back around in his chair. "Mikey, you are crazy," he mumbled to himself as he took his soldering iron, resuming his work from before. "But..."

Chapter 5

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jamie-leah · 3 years ago

Text

MYC Part 4

Bucky x Reader

Mini-Series

Summary: Life gets complicated when your ex comes back from the dead. How the story goes is up to you…

Word Count: 1268

Warnings: Mentions of blood, swearing

A/N: Sorry for not sticking to the schedule, I have been ill (not covid!) - had an awful headache and couldn't do much. Anyway here's the penultimate part!

Special Mention: My best friend, Jay, has drawn all the pictures you will see in this series. He is amazing and incredibly talented in lots of styles. He is super friendly so please check him out here! And show some love <3 He is also taking requests!!!

MYC Masterlist

When you stepped onto the jet you were greeted with hugs from Steve, Sam and Bucky. And despite the wounds littering your body you made sure to squeeze them for all you were worth.

Bucky wouldn’t let you do anything without getting patched up first, so you came to a compromise. He would fix you up as you explained everything. So that was where you found yourself, sitting on the edge of a cargo box, Bucky touching you like you were glass and Steve and Sam waiting for you to explain.

You sigh, “I got given a mission. It was the last one before I left.”

Steve frowns, “if you left just like that, why didn’t you leave before?”

Bucky looks up at you. He knows this part. You told him all about this one night after a nightmare.

“I worked for Hydra because they had leverage. Why they picked me I can’t tell you, besides my military background there was nothing special about me. I came home from deployment to find my parents gutted, murdered, their insides draped over furniture like Halloween décor.”

You stare into space, remembering the scene like it was yesterday, you can still taste the copper in the back of your throat, “I’ve seen some shit before then but that? I got a call about thirty seconds later that they had my sister and that they wanted me to work for them and they’d let her live.”

Bucky finishes with the med supplies and places his hand above your knee with a reassuring squeeze.

You flash him a smile and continue, looking at him the entire time, “I played by their rules and I did what they asked without question. My sister was all I had left. They stuck to their word and I got to see her after every mission. Except when I completed this one, they told me she died. They told me she tried to escape the little town they put her in, and she died in the recapture.”

You look back to Steve, “I left the moment I had nothing left to lose.”

“So, what was the mission?”, Sam asks.

“The Taiga.”

Bucky looks to you, confused, “the Russian Boreal forest?”

You nod, “the largest forested region on Earth.”

“What did they want you to do?”

You shrug, “the mission was vague. It was to search and capture a Greek artefact. I had orders to kill any and all in my way, but they didn’t want me to come back without having searched every inch of that forest.”

Steve shakes his head, “I don’t get it. If that’s the largest forested area on Earth why would they only send one person to search?”

“Well, to cut a long story short, I found a witch in a wooden hut in the middle of the Taiga. A good witch. She warded the surrounding area from ‘those with bad souls’. I’m assuming this is why they couldn’t find it. She told me she could see all there was, is, and ever will be. She told me that the thing Hydra sought would bring the world to its knees and that I was the only one to stand between them and the end.

I didn’t argue with her. She said she would give me the key and keep the box and that they should always be kept separate so that if one was ever lost to Hydra it would mean nothing without the other.”

Sam cocks his head, “so you have the key?”

You don’t say anything as you reach into Bucky’s pocket to pull out a knife. The boys look wearily at you, but you continue with purpose, your movements sure. You prick your left finger and wait for enough blood to gather before drawing a line of blood over a tattoo on your right wrist. A tattoo of a key.

You and the boys watch as the tattoo rises into a real key, resting on your wrist and the tattoo nowhere to be seen.

“Holy sh-“

Steve cuts Sam off, “language.”

You smile despite the situation and draw another line of blood down the key and watch it fade back into a tattoo.

Bucky asks, “how come it doesn’t appear when you’re injured, and your blood gets on your wrist?”

“I’m not entirely sure how the magic works but it has to do with intention. It knows the difference.”

“So, what exactly does it open?”

You look at the boys in turn before answering, “Pandora’s box.”

The jet goes silent for a time as you let the boys digest exactly what you said. You could feel the questions on the tip of their tongues but you beat them to it, “I have no idea what is actually in there but whatever it is, if Hydra want it, we can’t let them have it.”

The boys nod in unison. You give Sam the exact coordinates and he walks off to program them in.

Bucky lifts you off the cargo box as Steve asks, “why now? Why are we going to get the box now? You think Hydra know where it is?”

You lean into Bucky as you answer Steve, “if they knew where it was, they wouldn’t have captured me. But I just have this feeling they’re closing in and I can’t shake it.”

When you finally arrive at the coordinates you gave Sam, all was silent. Snow had blanketed the ground in a cold embrace. The jet was hovering just out of reach of the Witch’s hut and you were all gearing up ready to deploy.

You turn to grab a few extra weapons and bump into a wall of muscle. Bucky’s hands reach out to steady you, gripping your upper arms gently but with an urgency that had you glancing up at him.

“I just, I know we haven’t had a chance to catch up or talk, but before we go out there, I wanted you to know, no matter what has happened or what will happen, I’m always going to have your back.”

You search his eyes. The hard, cool steel softening the longer he gazes at you. You know that everything could change, and nothing may be the same and Bucky knows it too.

You push up on your toes to place a soft kiss on his lips, whispering, “forever and always.”

You see Steve turn to you and Bucky in the corner of your eye and say, “you guys ready?”

You keep your eyes on Bucky and he keeps his on yours and murmurs, “forever and always.”

You all take a cautious step onto the snow. Your knees slightly bent, arms raise holding your gun and the boys following behind.

The wind whistles, swirling the dusting of snow in a type of dance to the backdrop of the birds calling.

Your breath is causing puffs of air to appear in short bursts, but you don’t let it distract you as you glance all around the hut. The quiet should have been a comfort but the hairs on the back of your neck told a different story.

You keep your gun trained forward but look behind you. You catch Steve and Sam’s attention and signal with one of your hands for them to circle behind the hut.

You continue slowly to the front door as Steve and Sam crunch to the back. You look back to Bucky and he nods to you. He has your back, always.

As the door becomes within arms reach your senses scream at you to leave, to run, to not open the door.

[Do you open the door? The choice is yours...]

4th Choice (1) - Yes

4th Choice (2) - No

Taglist: @harrystylesisgolden @stucky-my-ship @savvywords @buckysbaby-doll

#bucky x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky x you #bucky fanfic #bucky #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky fandom #bucky series #bucky x f!reader #bucky fic #bucky fluff

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allegra-writes · 5 years ago

Text

"Lights Up" part I

Peter Parker x SHIELD Agent!Reader

NSFW

Warnings: And there was only one bed!!

Peter must deal with the aftermath of what Mysterio did, but he's not alone: Nick Fury and Pepper Stark have a plan, one that includes you, Peter and the tropical desert island of Eroda.

Series Masterlist

His lungs were on fire, his legs burning with the strain, he didn't know how much longer he was going to be able to go on. The sharp pain piercing his side was disconcerting, he used to be familiar with it, he remembered as much, but he hadn't felt it in years, not since the spider bite. In fact, he couldn't remember the last time he had gotten so much as winded just from running, but he had been at it for hours now, ever since he had ditched MJ and his suit in that dingy alley in hopes of Peter Parker being a little more inconspicuous than Spider-Man.

But by then, everyone in the city knew his face, and in the age of the internet and smartphones all it took was one single snap, one tweet, one livestream, to find himself surrounded by an angry mob, screaming for his blood, like something out of an old horror movie. All they were missing were the pitchforks and torches. There was nowhere to hide.

So he ran.

And he kept on running, but even he couldn't run forever. At least not without eating anything, the calorie deficiency starting to take a toll on his super-metabolism, causing him to become dizzy, his reflexes slower.

That was probably why he didn't realize his mistake until it was too late, until he reached the intersection and found himself surrounded: He had been ambushed, led like a lamb to the slaughter. He came to a halt, turning around, looking in vain for a way out, but the circle they had arranged around him was a tight formation, he was either going to have to fight his way out or shoot a web and swing away and he could kiss goodbye any chance left at keeping his identity secret after that…

"Looks like we caught ourselves a spider, guys!"

"Not so brave now, eh boy?"

Peter cursed internally. There was no other way, falling into stance, he braced himself for the fight. But before he could make a move, he saw it. A car, a rather distinctive one, heading straight their way, and it wasn't slowing down. If anything, it seemed to speed up the closer it got to the crowd, forcing people -including Peter- to jump out of the way to avoid being run over.

"Get in!"

He didn't need to be told twice, jumping into the passenger seat, the car speeding away before he even got to close the door completely. You stole a glance at him. He looked tired, maybe a little pale, but uninjured. You sighed in relief. He was there, you had gotten to him on time. He was safe.

Safe and openly gawking at you.

"Y- y/n?"

You flinched,

"Yeah, not my real name" You took your eyes off the road to give him an apologetic look, "Sorry 'bout that"

"Then who are you?" His voice was steel. So much for being grateful for saving his ass, then…

"I'm agent 16 of S.H.I.E.L.D's Special Service. I was assigned to protect you" You threw him a side-glance, "and a little 'thank you' would be nice"

Well, that explained the uniform and you driving Item 20-25. God, he was so stupid! Of course you were a spy, why else would a girl like you even give him the time of day? The pretty girls at his school weren't nice, not to him at least. But now it all made sense, down to the very first time he saw you, beaming at him as Mr. Warren pointed at the empty seat beside him. All the times your hands brushed in class, fingers lingering on test tubes and books a couple of seconds longer than necessary. All those little touches, all the secret looks when you thought he wasn't watching, it was probably all part of your mission. Probably just to get close to him, to gain his trust. After all, you had demonstrated you weren't truly interested in him when you turned down his invitation to prom.

He had cried afterwards. Not much, not like at Ben's funeral, or when Mister Stark… No, definitely not like that, but he had shed a couple of tears that night.

He had lost sleep and appetite over you. Lost hours daydreaming about you, about the fruity smell of your hair, wondering what your strawberry lipstick would taste like. But the truth was, after all this time, after all that staring, all that pinning he didn't know anything about you, did he? Not even...

"Can you tell me your real name?"

"You don't have the clearance for that"

You replied, turning to face him. And maybe he ought to fasten that seat belt after all, or shut up and stop distracting you from the road, cause you were still going too damn fast and breaking all traffic laws known to mankind. Mr Dell's shocked, appalled face after your driving test flashed through his mind.

"Spider-Man has a level 6 clearance" he protested.

"You need a level 9. At least."

"I thought 9 was the highest level" Gods, his frown was adorable.

You just smirked and made another turn, driving through an entrance and a ramp that hadn't been there a second ago.

"We're here" You announced, killing the engine. Peter didn't move.

"Where exactly is 'here'?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D's Manhattan headquarters"

You got out of the car, rounding to his side and pulling his door open, then closing it once he had gotten out. The gentleman in him protested it should be the other way around, he should be the one opening doors for you and helping you out of cars. It was absurd, of course. There, with you in that black catsuit, thigh holsters on both your legs, walking like you owned the place there was no mistaking it: You weren't y/n, his school crush; you were a highly trained special agent, escorting him through the premises.

… Pretty familiar premises, actually.

"Avengers Tower? S.H.I.E.L.D bought Avengers Tower?"

"It was a donation, actually" you explained as the elevator's doors opened to the Stark Memorial Garden, an open garden as majestic as it was massive, located right in the heart of the building.

"A donation? But wh-"

"Peter! Oh thank god!" A relieved voice and the clicking of hills on the stone path interrupted him.

"Mrs. Stark?" Peter let himself be crushed into Pepper's chest, closing his eyes, the tears he hadn't known he was holding back starting to fall as soon as he felt safe in her embrace.

If Tony Stark had been like a father to him, Pepper Potts-Stark was a mother trough and trough. She had tried to step into her husband's role of a mentor for Peter, knowing fully well she couldn't ever replace him or occupy his place; but she would be damned if she allowed that giant Tony shaped hole on that boy's life to go unattended, to bleed out or fester. The kid had already lost so much, almost every parent figure he had ever had. And she knew what that kind of loss could do to precocious boys with too big hearts, had seen it first hand with Tony.

"Mrs. Stark I'm so- I'm so sorry"

"Shhh" She said soothingly, "It's not your fault. You're going to be ok, I promise. We'll figure it out" Pepper sounded like she was trying to convince herself as much as him.

"Pete! Six!"

Peter broke the hug just in time to see a little dark haired meteor jump into your arms. He watched, stunned, as Morgan clung to you. He knew once upon a time she had been an outgoing, confident child but ever since her father's death she had grown timid. She didn't open up easily to strangers, Peter being a rare exception, and even that had been solely because of the stories Tony used to tell her about her 'super big brother' adventures. She had developed a sort of hero worship for Peter that only rivaled the one she felt for her father. For her to be so friendly towards you had to mean you had spent a considerable amount of time together, and Peter remembered the tales you used to tell in class about the adorable little girl you babysat sometimes.

"You did it! You found him!"

You smiled at her.

"Told you I would, Morgs. And I always keep my word" He watched you squeeze her again in your arms, he could tell you cared about the kid, probably even missed her while you and him were in Europe. But the sweet reunion was short lived, as soon another voice, more stern, resonated through the garden.

"In our line of work, I'm not sure that can be considered a good thing"

You gasped in mock trepidation, making Morgan giggle and Peter smile despite himself.

"Uh-oh! We've been caught!" You passed the still laughing kid to Peter and stood straighter, trying to sober up. Peter could see the corners of your mouth twitch as you greeted, "Director"

He gave you a nod,

"Agent. Parker, Mrs. Stark. Good, now that everybody's here, we can get a move on"

Without waiting for a reply, Nicholas Fury started walking again, leaving everyone to scramble to follow.

"I know this seems like the end of the world, Mr. Parker, and I'll admit the situation isn't ideal," the intimidating man punched a code into a hidden panel and another elevator opened. "but our main priority right now is your safety. We'll treat this like any other blown cover, following the same protocols we follow when any of our agent's identity is compromised: Immediate extraction and relocation of the agent into a safe house, with an armed escort for protection, of course" He explained as everybody climbed in.

"You're sending me away with a bodyguard?" Peter sounded less than pleased and you couldn't help the pang of sympathy. You didn't like to be pulled off the field either.

"I understand how that could be uncomfortable for you," it didn't sound like he particularly cared, though, "so perhaps it would be less unpleasant with an element you're already familiar with. Agent 16 here is going to be your companion"

"What does that means, Six?" Morgan turned to you, still perched onto Peter's torso, like a baby koala.

"It means I'm going to babysit your brother instead of you, for a while…" You threw the brunet boy a wink and his protests about not needing babysitting died on his lips. It didn't sound so bad, actually. Being cooped up with you in some secret location for an indeterminate amount of time.

"How long would we be gone?"

"As long as it takes for the director and me to fix this" Pepper spoke with the authority only her seemed to possess, the one that could reing in crazy geniuses dash heroes and master spies alike. Fury could only nod in compliance.

"What about May?"

"She's with Happy, already on her way to the lake house"

Peter still looked unsure, but Pepper smiled, eyes sparkling with a mischievous glint surprisingly similar to the one her husband used to have.

"Don't worry, Peter. You'll love the safe house. I know Tony and I did…"

…

Leaving Morgan at the launch bay had been the hardest part. Her tears soaking Peter's t-shirt as Pepper tried to pry the fabric out of her little hands, were enough to break his heart. She didn't want to let her big brother go, probably terrified he wouldn't come back, just like her father. Far too perceptive for a six year old kid, she understood Peter was in trouble, in danger, and she was scared.

Peter was scared too.

How could he not? He might be naive but he wasn't stupid, he knew that no matter the outcome of whatever plan Mrs. Stark and Fury came out with, his life as he knew it was over.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry" Your earnest voice pulled him out of his dark thoughts, "For lying to you, for what Beck did, for everything."

Peter stared at your profile, something he seemed to be doing a lot that day. Who was he trying to kid, he did a lot of that everyday. It actually seemed to be the only normal thing that remained, the one thing that seemed to stay constant as the world shifted and changed around him. He should be mad at you, he knew that. He should feel betrayed, hurt, and he did, a little but it was hard to stay angry at you. Even when you were partnered at school and you failed to do your part in the projects, he used to have trouble not forgiving you the second you flashed those doe eyes at him.

He sighed,

"It's not your fault, any of it. About the lying, you were only doing your job" It wasn't your fault that he had been dumb enough to fall in love with a girl that didn't even exist. "And as for Quentin… that definitely wasn't your fault"

"My job was to protect you. If I had done it right, none of this would have happened" there was a slight catch in your voice "I should have realized he was a fraud, I should have told Nick as soon as I started having doubts about the guy, I should have stopped him before he stole E.D.I.T.H; I should have-" You turned away, pretending to get engrossed in the navigation controls of the Quinjet.

"I should have found that video and stopped it from reaching the news" You finished, voice finally under control, but still not meeting Peter's eyes.

"I was the one that literally handed E.D.I.T.H to him" You felt his hand cover yours over a lever, and looked at him in surprise. He found your eyes, a soft look in his that made your insides fill with butterflies, "He tricked me too. Do you blame me for that?"

"What? No, of course not!"

Your indignation on his behalf warmed his chest.

"Then why blame yourself for the same thing?"

He had a point. Luckily, you were saved from having to answer him by a blip in your instruments.

"Looks like we're here" You commented instead, initiating landing maneuvers.

"Where is here, exactly?" He peered out of the windscreen, into the darkness of the night, trying to get a look. And who knew, with his super senses maybe he could.

"Somewhere in the middle of the Pacific. An island, apparently, a very isolated one..."

"So you've never been here before either?"

"No, this isn't one of S.H.I.E.L.D's safe houses. This one is Mrs. Stark's"

"Oh" Peter smiled for the first time since leaving NYC, "It must be really cool then"

"Yeah, I imagine it is" You smiled back

The house was not how you imagined Tony Stark's safe house would be like. For starters, the wooden construction wasn't even a house, a bungalow would have been a more appropriate title. The one-room little shack stood semi hidden by palm trees on the beach, and you knew the island was probably beautiful, but you couldn't see much in the moonless night.

Inside there wasn't much to see either, just a queen sized bed, a cupboard with a chest of drawers and a recliner by one of the windows. Ever the gentleman, Peter had offered to take the recliner, but you had rolled your eyes and pointed out the bed was big enough for the both of you.

"I don't know why we're so surprised" Peter's voice reached you through the bathroom door, where he was changing into his pjs, "I mean, we've seen the Lake House and, sure, it's very luxurious for a cabin but that's what it is: a cabin"

"Maybe" You replied, flopping on the bed. At least it was comfy "but they have FRIDAY over there. Here we barely even have electricity"

Peter stopped in his tracks as soon as he walked into the room, and you pretended not to notice the way his eyes lingered on your exposed legs, your tiny cotton sleeping shorts not covering much at all.

"It's just, I can't possibly believe Tony Stark didn't installed any defense system on his safe house. I mean, you knew the man better than I did, but doesn't it strike you as a little… odd?"

"Huh? Ye-yeah, I mean, I…" You could see his cheeks turn red. God, he was adorable.

"Peter?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you coming to bed?"

He choked on his own spit, and you had to suppress a giggle. Maybe, just maybe, he truly did forgive you for lying to him. Maybe you still had a chance.

…

Peter couldn't sleep. He could feel the heat coming off your skin through the small distance separating your bodies, your perfume invading his nostrils with every breath. Being so close to you in the dark was torture and yet he couldn't bring himself to get up and go to the chair on the other side of the room. He was pinned to the bed, mesmerized by your sleeping profile, enthralled by the way your chest rose and fell with every deep, steady breath. Irrevocably and inescapably drawn to you like a moth to a flame, too scared to move, too afraid to disturb your dream.

Because it appeared to be a very good dream. He could see the blush spreading from your face to your neck, all the way down to where the neckline of your tank top obscured his view. He could hear your breathing starting to quicken, feel the temperature of your skin rise. He could smell you, sweet and enticing. Beckoning.

Your lips parted, letting out the most captivating little sigh in the history of mankind, and his eyes zeroed in the movement, his tongue darting out to wet his own.

Peter felt his blood rushing south and was disgusted by himself, he felt like a creep. What kind of psycho got off of watching a girl sleep? Yet he couldn't bring his eyes to avert their gaze.

He needed to get out of there, give you some semblance of privacy, as your hips started to twitch minutely, seeking a friction they wouldn't find. You let out a soft whine and he screwed his eyes shut. 'Come on Parker, get a grip on yourself' he thought, trying to gather enough strength to pry himself from the bed, to pry himself from your side. He was about to, he truly was, when it happened.

You rolled over, half trapping him under your body. And it wouldn't have been hard for him to escape if he wanted to. But he really really didn't want to. The voice inside his head telling him it was wrong was growing weaker and weaker with every pretty noise leaving your mouth. Your hot breath was searing against the skin of his chest and he both cursed and blessed the instant he decided to forego wearing a t-shirt to bed in the sultry island heat.

"Peter" You murmured in your sleep and his heart stopped. You were dreaming about him. You were panting and burning up for him, and he knew it didn't necessarily mean anything and dreams were not real life, but your legs fell open, one knee on either side of one of his, and he could actually feel your warm wetness through the thin fabric of your sleeping shorts and his threadbare plaid pajama pants and fuck!

Whatever last trace of logic might remained in his brain flew out the window as you started rubbing yourself on his thigh, finally finding the friction you so desperately needed. His hand went to your waist to stop you, but it ended up aiding you instead, sliding to your lower back, pressing down and releasing rhythmically, rocking you against his leg harder.

He glared at the traitorous appendage, but how could he reproach it it's betrayal, when you were moaning so sweetly? He wanted to commit those sounds to his memory, to tattoo them on his brain to play over every night when he'd found himself alone on his cold bed, one hand around his length and the other over his mouth to stop himself from yelling your name at the ceiling, as he had so many times before.

You breathed out his name again, and his free hand went to his pelvis, of its own volition. He palmed himself over his pants, but that's as far as he would let himself go. He refused to be the guy who jerked himself off next to an unconscious girl.

A new wave of moisture left your core, soaking his skin through the fabrics.

"Fuck!" He cursed softly, head hitting the tall headboard as he threw it back.

"Peter?"

He froze. No. Oh god, please no...

To be continued...

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x reader fanfic #peter parker x reader smut #peter parker imagine #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x reader smut #tom.holland x reader fanfic #tom holland imagine

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mc-critical · 4 years ago

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hey, welcome back! hope your exams and stuff went well, and that you're doing fine now.

i wanted to hear your opinion on nigar hatun. i remember seeing one post of yours in which you said that she wasn't a favourite of yours like you favoured other characters and honestly, same. i didn't really much understand the fascination with her. she was an interesting character, but i can't imagine having her as a favourite when there are so many more characters who are far more interesting. i wish they gave her an alternate arc. idk what it could be, i'd like to hear your opinion on it. one alternative ending i came up for her is that she was extremely angry at ibrahim for toying with her and hatice for keeping her sweet little esmanur from her so she joins hurrem to defeat them? which hurrem did try but it didn't really go anywhere and nigar was against hurrem for killing ibrahim which just was kinda frustrating. they literally give hurrem no ally in the harem [except mihrimah later on but mihri is overall varying in terms of power] so it would be good for her to have some support in the harem from people who actually hated her enemies like her. she had actual political support from iskender celebi, rustem, and ayaz pasha and all, sure, but she didn't have much support in the harem, like all powerful women of the harem were against her. nigar obviously wasn't powerful like a sultan but she was an old member of the harem, was respected and even though she kinda lost her dignity with the scandal, she could've regained it with hurrem's help. sumbul was there later on but he was just a very faithful servant and didn't really have any real motive to harm any of hurrem's enemies except for out of his loyalty whilst nigar could've cultivated a hatred for hatice and ibrahim. this is a basic plot but i would've kinda liked seeing it. there can be many more ways her character could've ended but it would be good seeing a woman who didn't bow to her feelings all the time. the sultanas couldn't really control their feelings when it came to love because they were princesses who were used to getting what they wanted most of the time but nigar was a servant who also suffered the hardships of slavery and it obviously would've made her tougher as a person so she could control her feelings better; idk, i feel like this is an aspect of women they could've explored [or if they did explore it, i don't remember it lol my memory lapses a lot so i don't remember the show 100%] anyway, would like to hear your thoughts on nigar. thank you. welcome back again <3

Thank you! <33 Yup, I'm fine and the exams went well. Happy Pride month to you, too! 🏳️‍🌈

Hehe, I wrote that post years ago and while Nigar still isn't one of my absolute favourite characters, I've warmed up to her quite a bit. And honestly, now with the wider experience in the fandom, I can say that she isn't all that loved as it looks like. I then was under the limited wrong impression that the BG Mamma forum was a metric of all the popular opinions and yes, they loved Nigar a lot and I was sometimes confused as to why, but really, that and the Russian fanbase are the only places I have encountered that appreciate her all that much. There are characters I find more interesting than her, that's for sure, but she has her charm and I'm firmly against people reducing her to "evil" or "manipulative" or "weak after she fell in love with Ibrahim", so forth.

The thing she sets her first impression with is her intelligence caused by her relatively high experience in the harem. The advice she gave to H��rrem opened the path to her whole goal (as she herself acknowledged in E41) and that makes for quite an impact for a more recurring character. Despite of this, I never viewed early Nigar as someone taking an open side, hence I didn't find her supposed betrayal to Hürrem surprising in the slightest: she is also trying to survive in this environment in any way she knows how and she can't really find a fully comfortable position, because she is well aware that everyone is thinking for their own gain in the end. Including her. So the only choice she has left is to direct herself to where the wind is blowing and get advantages for herself once she gets the chance. Because all the experience has taught her to repress her feelings (E10 to Hürrem: "In this castle you can't show weakness."), opt to be the more level-headed person and seek for the more pragmatic solutions.

And yet she is very sensitive and perceptive to people that are different than the others or that are in need and is willing to lend them her hand. She adviced and helped Hürrem because she found potential in her, because she wanted to see her succeed, but not through endangering her own self or other people in the process (she told Hürrem that her game had gone too far again in E41), but through negotiation, compromise and adaption, to know when to start and when to stop and be respectful to those above her, no matter how hard or limiting that may look in Hürrem's eyes. Hürrem had the tendency in viewing every sign of support that came to her as granted, she still had that naive part of innocence in her in S01 and early on was in a desparate need of someone to lean on and unconditionally follow her path, that's why when Nigar diverted from that path, it hurt and took her a while to start trusting her again. But I didn't see Nigar as all that attached to Hürrem as Hürrem herself thought she was, especially with how Nigar became stuck between two sultanas later in S01 and that rendered her lost and more insecure than usual.

That's also why I don't view her as a two-faced or hypocritical double-crosser. Because for the longest time, Nigar was the one character in the series before Rüstem appeared that was clearly thinking about her own benefit and survival first and foremost from the beginning when darting between the powerful people in the harem and was the one well aware that she simply can't cling to a single side in her own position. Positions aren't permanent and can always change in such circumstances, so why can't she take advantage of this? Because who cares as much about the feelings for a Kalfa they can still order around after all? She has faced disregard from Mahidevran, Hürrem, Ibrahim and even Hatice. It is pretty understandable that she's going to seek the best opportunity for herself.

That whole facade breaks when she falls in love with Ibrahim. During rewatch, I found myself to have a soft spot for this character deconstruction, especially in S02. I know that it came to pass because of her falling in love with a man that doesn't share the same feelings and there were moments where it looked like she overdid it, even in S02, but for me, the whole thing nicely added a new layer of depth, while still feeling true to Nigar's character. Her future relationship with Ibrahim had been building up back in S01, when Ibrahim (both inadvertently and not I fully believe) played a part in helping her solve the first internal conflict she had (that is the struggle between the two sultanas). Maybe this didn't mean that much to Ibrahim, maybe he was simply trying to be helpful, but it meant a lot to Nigar - that was probably the first time someone seemed to take her feelings into account and actually listen when she couldn't help, but crack under the pressure. So it is only natural that she would search for this source of comfort once again, being ready to face every risk in the process. When she is appointed to Hatice and Ibrahim's castle, when she's practically left alone with Ibrahim, she decides to take that chance, to taste the forbidden fruit. He gave her something she never received and due to her not allowing herself to show weakness and having to cave to everyone else's demands before that, every ounce of affection Ibrahim shows her, it means the world to her. Thus she begins to idealize what she has with him, to the point of denial and delusion, and centers her loyalty completely on him. But that loyalty never seems to falter. She began to resent and/or hate everyone who could possibly stand in Ibrahim's way, something she wouldn't have ever done before. She keeps her level-headed self and intelligence (I don't think that this plot line reduced it in any way, not even when she was at her worst.) and she's ready to take any opportunity for herself (case in point: her marriage with Rüstem.), but now her softer sides and her wish for affection are showing all the more.

The problem I have with Nigar's character, writing-wise, and now that I think about it, the main subject of why I didn't get the deal with her back then (along with considering her S01 self bland.. somehow?), is her S03B characterization. While her falling in love with Ibrahim plot-line became an important part of S02 Nigar's storyline, I don't think it overshadowed or dominated over her other characteristics, making for a neat balance of traits and an interesting, nuanced character. In an attempt to keep her for longest time possible in the story, S03B flanderized her in every possible way and overexaggerated her biggest strengths and flaws until they became stale and unbelievable. Her love for Ibrahim read as а near obsession narratively and her opportunism coupled with her will for revenge, which put her into many repetitive intrigues. At one point I even felt she was reduced to a plot-device (the moment Şah Sultan appointed her as a spy) and she felt a little too purposeless and to have totally outstayed her welcome until her last moment in the series.

The root of this problem is again, that they just didn't know when to stop with Nigar. To be brutally honest, she had no long-term role left to play after Ibrahim's death and it was time for the writers to let her go and maintain her generally strong characterization. The ending I would've chosen for her is to simply have Matrakcı give her Esmanur's location and for her to live with her daughter in piece. I know that because of the tonal shift, the show seemed to be already inclined that everyone had to have a tragic ending of sorts, to underline the growing ruthlessness and cruelty of the themes, but I fully believe that Nigar was one of the only characters that were terribly forced through their tragic endings. She didn't need, nor deserve a tragic ending and I doubt it would've been such a problem for the half-season if she didn't get one. I find a happier ending to be perfectly fine for Nigar and I would've loved to see it, if only for a freshness in ideas for character endings. I loved her Esmanur storyline and to witness her finding happiness with her, the only solace she had left, would have been a great wrap up of her S03 plots and an amazing send-off to Nigar's character.

I appreciate the thought you have put into your ending for her and to be fair, your proposal would be much better than anything S03B gave us. It would nearly correspond with the revenge plot of hers they were going for and it would be something more original at the same time. Hürrem's principal lack of allies doesn't bother me as a fact alone, because all her enemies have understandable reasons to be against her, but what bothers me however, is when the writers try using it to dumb her enemies down and make them doom themselves through their own failings or outright use it to put forced (often soapy) conflicts to make the audience sympathize with Hürrem. Or to make everyone "mistitle" her (is that a word? probably not.) or disrespect her on purpose again for sympathy points (that go beyond the part of her motivation that wants to feel respected and does stuff out of fear not to fall under a less favorable position once again.), without changing the status-quo until say, S04.

It is so deliberate it becomes annoying and seeing something else for a change... honestly, gimme! While I personally prefer a happy ending for Nigar, I would live for Nigar and Hürrem to work together again, while keeping what's become her central motivation intact. It may seem a little OOC for Nigar to work for Hürrem by that point, because she's channeled her loss of the most precious people into rage on those that have taken them away, but it would be a decent shifting of gears and a reverence to her opportunism to work to eradicate those she hates for good, even if it means doing so with one of your bigger enemies. After all, after the mission is fulfilled, she could still work against Hürrem in some way, right?

[Tell me if I got what you meant wrongly, but there is an example of a dynasty sultana putting her love feelings behind and by that I mean Şah Sultan. Her love is in the past by the point she arrived in the castle and her love for Ibrahim is only used as a conflict between her and Hatice, which they get over relatively quick. Sisterly love and ambition are a much bigger priority of Şah's: she cared about Hatice past any resentment she may have harbored over the years and agreed to share her life with Lütfi for the advantage this may bring, even though she didn't love him at all. She divorced him only when he offended the pride of a woman and her own personal pride. Other than that, we indeed didn't have a female character in MC that puts her feelings behind in design as far as I recall, only ones that end up clinging to them completely like Nigar here or ones that let go of them eventually like Mahidevran. Characters that have this design by default are more present in MCK like Safiye, or Turhan, or especially Gülbahar, but as I've said many times, MCK is more ruthless, while MC is more about the personal feelings of the characters, hence every motivation they have is somehow tied to them.]

#magnificent century #muhteşem yüzyıl #muhtesem yuzyil #nigar kalfa #nigar hatun #ask #mihrimah-sultan-can-rail-me

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rixxy8173571m3w1p3 · 6 years ago

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Out Of The Woods (3/?)

This multi chap fic has been one that I've wanted to write for a while. I'm hoping to connect a few loose ends, since my series is getting closer to the end. Don't worry, I still got a couple of fics left in me. I'd love to thank @xerxezra whose conversations with me are always inspirational. I'd also like to thank @dorkydisappointment whose writing got my creative juice flowing and @hoodoo12 who continues to inspire me all the time. Please check out the wonderful art done by @ravenousscorpian for two scenes out of the second chapter of this fic (Her art found here)

References to the woman in Ricks journal is from my fic What You Found Amongst The Pages. I know, that was shameless self promotion. There are a lot of questions that I wanted to answer in you'd chapter, but for the sake of editing had to put it in the next. I'll work on it right as soon as this is posted. Thanks for everyone's continued support. 😘😘😘😘😘😘

If you haven't read part 1 or part2, then heres a link (Read Chapter 1, Chapter 2)

In this fic the reader tries to uncover the mystery of the artist behind Zeta-7s portrait.

___________________________

Chapter 3: Dare Not Say That Man Forgets Sooner

Whatever redeeming qualities the room held in the previous happy hours were gone, and now even the remnant, lingering daydreams were falling away. With every hour you comprehended the severity of your assumptions and what the consequences were if you decided that enough was enough. Honestly, you didn't want to lose him because Zeta-7 was the light of your life; he expanded your universe and had helped you become a better person, but you could still carry on if you needed to. You had the means, your work, and an ever growing list of books to read, but was it enough, now that you had gotten a taste of the good life? Probably not.

Nothing made sense anymore.

Concerning the current situation, and all which led up to it; if you considered everything which included your existence, life till now, and all he had ever done, then there was no mistaking that he loved you; or had; at least thought he did, but it didn't change the truth of the matter; you hadn't been the first. A few hours had given you time to weep until you thought you had no tears left to cry, but there was still a thick fog over your thoughts and rationality; any shift of emotion being too much to bear. You curled into yourself, aching, hoping you'd disappear, but it didn't work; you were still here; stuck. Being at a disadvantage, not knowing how to get home and neither having a way to get there if you could was frustrating.

Who knows how long you'd been down here, despairing, wallowing in memories and dust, but you were tired, thirsty, and knew that if you didn't move he'd have trouble finding you, and yet you didn't care; let him find you; let him work for it. Though, how would that make it any better? All it would do is succeed in upsetting him before you knew all the facts. You hated this. Father always said hate was a strong word that shouldn't be taken for granted; you rarely had reason to feel as such, but the more you gleaned from those photos and the more proof you found of her presence about the place made you feel hateful and bitter.

Thinking of her smiling at him, receiving every bit of his loving-kindness and inviting demeanor animated by unaffected good-will; his general countenance and becoming familiar with a fresher-faced creature of your dreams; holding him; touching him; loving him. Oh God no, you thought, groaning into a handmade pillow. What was worse was that you couldn't dissuade the thought of her mysterious silhouette sneaking up behind you, plunging a knife into your already fragile identity, and taking back what was hers. Your doubt feeding these ugly horrors which were hybrids of nightmares and daydreams.

Though during a brief moment of clarity, you had come to a conclusion which hardly alleviated these feelings, but we're true; it wasn't your fault. Yes, it had been your choice to accept him and be in a proper relationship with someone with an ambiguous past, and yes you did snoop around a little, but you didn't know how much he'd been hiding or searching for someone like her and had settled on silly, stupid you. Yet, no matter how much you thought about it, why chase a vision of the past and put so much effort in the present? There must've been more to this; there had to be.

Manifested, unstinted kindness and consideration and love in his form didn't happen out of the blue, it was nurtured and conditioned. Had it been her influence which made you knew? Who knows, but you had been fortunate to have had an opportunity to associate let alone form a romantic attachment, but that would soon pass away once you confronted him. Right? After a little while longer, when your heart was finally beginning to slow and thought you'd be able to catch your breath, you heard him walking about upstairs; calling and knocking.

Rick was home and you turned over on the couch and covered your ears so you wouldn't hear him; you weren't ready to deal with this; you didn't want to deal with this. In your heart of hearts, you wanted to go home, to the past, back to when there were no problems and it was just you, dad, and your dreams. If only he was still around so that he could tell you that everything was alright and it was all just a bad dream and that he could fix it, but you couldn't; only in a dream, you could. Dad always knew what was best, but you were old enough to decide for yourself now.

Did this mean you wish you never knew Rick? No, but you wished that you would've never known about all this; about her; that you could've lived in ignorance. Oh, the sweet, sweet bliss of ignorance, how wonderful it had been while it lasted. Even when his warm laughter echoed down the stairway, having found you, ready, eager and excitable to be near you, you didn't answer. You knew you weren't in the state of mind to say anything nice, that despite it all he wasn't a bad person. Yet, the moment that hand of his touched your shoulder, you hissed. “Don't touch me.”

He gasped, stunned by this uncharacteristic aggression. Maybe you weren't the nice girl he thought you were after all; especially if the rustling of his clothes alone made you angry enough to dig your nails into the couch cushions. Zeta-7 waited for a few moments, ruminating on what would be the best course of action before he knelt down to be at your level and wondered. “What's wrong? Are y-y-you hurt? Is th-there anything I can do?”

Swallowing back a sob, you silently counted to ten then answered in a listless tone. “I don't know if you can. You've… you've been hiding stuff from me.”

“Huh, I-I have? What have I…”

“Don't try to deny it.”

Pushing yourself up, you rubbed your swollen eyes and chanced a look at him; your sight fuzzy as tears threatened to fall but thankfully didn't. The alarm in his widened eyes at the state of your runny nose, and tear-stained cheeks made him instinctively reach out to wipe your tears away, but you pushed that familiar, loving hand away. “M-mi corazón?”

Instead of answering as you usually would, you pulled out the well-loved copy of Persuasion from behind a pillow, took a deep breath and dropped it on his lap. “I found it while I was looking for something to read.”

“Oh geez.”

“And can you believe I found more than I bargained for.”

You two sat in silence for what felt like hours as he stared at it, and when he gathered the courage to look inside, the lines about his brow and mouth deepened; another sign that it was true. When he finally interrupted the silence, he confessed regretfully. “I-I was going to tell you.”

“But you didn't. There's a lot of things that I understand are none of my business, but this….I think is a good time to know. If you care about me at all, then read what you wrote.”

“But it's - it's not what you think.”

“Then there's nothing be afraid of. Go on then, read it.”

Visibly swallowing, his shaky hands held it open and he stuttered. “I-I-I thought of you today as I left th-the milky way, on my way t-to a classified location. I-I wish you were here so I could show you the beauty that exists across the universe, but knowing our limitations I can only send you this wonderful novel that I found when I was exploring a-a bookstore located on one of Saturn's moons. I-I know it can be hard to believe that Miss Jane Austen's works can reach the furthest depths of-of space, but that can be blamed on a certain Gallifreyan and his little blue box. I can't wait to hear what y-y-you think of it. Till next time my dear. With love, from Rick.”

“Don't forget the photos.”

Setting down the book, he glanced at the discarded photos, sagging a little after each one, gauging your reaction after he finished studying them. Rick was a smart man, he knew well enough that he messed up and how compromising those photos were. “It's not - I was only writing as ugh - as a friend.” He began, wringing his hands as he went on. “Y-y-y-y-you know I don't have that many.”

Which was true. “Really? So what did she do for you? Was she special?”

“She - she made me a little less lonely. That in itself was something I w-was grateful for.”

Your nails bit into your palms and that ever familiar ache bloomed across your chest; his answer birthing more questions than you were willing to ask. He offered you a Werther's original to placate you which you accepted; it's wrapper similar to the one in the painting. As ever he waited for you to answer, and the longer he waited, the more he sagged; his eyes pleading, hoping, wishing that he could know whatever hurt clouded your heart and wanted to fix it. “I want to believe you, I really do,” you admitted, which made him hopeful, though only for you to crush it with this. “but I'm tired of walking on eggshells. Tell me, what did you want from me when you had someone like her? Seems as though she was a good match for you. She was a creative who could paint, loved flowers, and butterflies among other things I imagine.”

“Sh-she did.”

You bit the inside of your cheek in an attempt to hold back the surge of feelings which were a result of his sincerity. Damn it. You could do this……possibly. “See?” you said cooly, focusing your gaze on your naked feet. “I knew she was special considering you sent her a book that had belonged to the Doctor. She also knew about your travels, which meant you trusted her and you hardly trust anyone. The point I'm getting at is that I want to know what I am to you. So, am I a knockoff or a rebound? Because we both know there's nothing like the real thing.”

“N-n-no, not at all. You mean th-the world to me and I-I love you. I have only loved you. ”

“But she loved you, didn't she? And you loved her. I can't ignore that. If she's anything like me, then what are we doing together Ricardo? Why aren't you with her? I…. I thought we understood each other but then I found proof that I was only second best. I can't do it, I can't compete with a shadow, and I'm not going to try. I don't have it in me.”

“I-I-I-I never expected you to. Por favor mi amor de m-mi vida, if you'll let me explain, I'll tell you whatever you want. I - I don't want to lose you. Please, honest t-t-to God, I don't. I can't.”

“Hmm, I didn't know you were a praying man.”

“When you're about t-t-to lose your universe, I don't think there are th-that many options. I can't - oh please I can't lose you. Not again.”

You felt your resolve breaking. You wanted to fall into his arms and melt into the comfort of them; for you both to comfort each other and let it all go because it probably was just a big misunderstanding; him being the best thing that ever happened to you, but not yet. Maybe he was a praying man after all, and if God was merciful, then why wouldn't you be? Rick certainly would. For Zeta-7, you could be. He'd definitely given you enough chances.

“Fine.” you decided, helping him up as you stood, but through this brief touch he almost misunderstood, thinking that the worst was over and gave your hand a squeeze; his warm smile weakening your resolve even further. Maybe Ricks were masters at mind games after all. And you knew it wouldn't take much for him to make you forget how unhappy you were, and like magic, show you something wonderful and dazzling, but you didn't want to be charmed; you wanted the truth. You bit the flesh inside of your cheeks hard enough for you to bleed, and despite relishing the warmth which permeated your chilled hands, you let go. “I'm……I'm not over it yet.”

TBC

#doofus rick #doofus rick x reader #rick sanchez x reader #rick sanchez #rick and morty #rick and morty fanfiction #j19z7 #rick j19z7 #j19ζ7 #rick j19zeta7 #j19zeta7 #j-19-zeta-7 #rick j-19-zeta-7 #rnm fanfic #rnm #my writing #my works

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lucisfavoritedemon · 6 years ago

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Serendipity

Pairing: Jack x Winchester!reader

Summary: Isn’t it sad to think that if certain things in your life never happened you would be totally different from the person you are today. Y/N and Jack were once parallel lines never destined to meet, but something in both their lives made them. Was it chance or just a fortunate accident?

Warnings: Fluff, angst, cuteness of young love, over protective brothers, language.

Word Count: 2008

A/N: Written for @thing-you-do-with-that-thing Spn Beautiful Words Challenge. My word was serendipity: the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way. This is just cute fluffiness with Jack. There is no smut because, well he is still technically a child. I just found this concept really cute. Enjoy!

She never planned on falling in love, ever. She had grown up in a life where attachments meant danger. Not just for you, but for the attachment itself. She had been taught at a young age to love but to keep your distance.

She never planned for one day love to come knocking on her door. She never expected it to be the very thing she was always taught to fear. He was her happy accident. The thing she never planned for, but the thing she always wanted.

Y/n Winchester was the youngest sibling. The boys didn't know she existed until after their father died. They had gotten a mysterious call from an unknown number. They agreed to meet and found out that she was their sister. Well sort of.

They took her in though. She knew the life that her father led. It was how her mother and him met. A hunt had brought them together. Y/n had called her dad wanting to tell him of her mother's passing, but instead got a voicemail saying to call Dean.

Her life became nothing but chaos then. She was almost teenager when she met up with the boys. Just started middle school. Dean didn't want to drag her all over like how they were raised, but Sam brought up a good point that she was already involved in the life, and whether they kept her out or not, she would always find her way back. They decided to take her to Bobby's. There he raised her and she finished school, but not without some changes to her life.

Hunting was always in her blood though. Even when she decided to go to college, she still hunted, but local hunts. It wasn't till she was going to go back to college for a summer semester when the boys found her again. This time they had someone with them. A boy who looked to be her age with light brown hair, and the most impressive eyes. She found herself staring at this man for a long time. That is till Dean broke her focus.

"Are you going to let us in or are you going to make us get a motel?" Dean said barging in anyways.

"Sorry I was hoping you would introduce me to your friend here."

"Not gonna happen. We are just watching him for a little while. We are just here for the night, then we are headed back to the Bunker."

"Right because you are afraid of me getting attached."

"Do you mind if we talk out in the hall for a second?" Dean asked grabbing her arm and practically dragging her out to the hallway.

"What is your problem? You just dragged me out of my apartment for no reason." She blurted out once he shut the door.

He looked around making sure no one was around before he spoke.

"You cannot have any association with that kid, do you understand? He is Lucifer's son. He could be dangerous and you are not going to have any part of this. You are going to finish school and live a normal life."

"Yeah because hunting is a normal life."

"You don't hunt anymore. You gave that up when you went off to school. At least you promised you would."

"Yeah well things change Dean. I have been taking local hunts. You know the occasional shifter and ghost."

"Oh...oh." Dean was shocked to hear her say this, but he was glad she had taken notice to the surrounding areas.

"I know I made a promise, but if I see something I'm not going to ignore it like most people do. I do my best to solve it."

"I'm actually really proud of you for that. I know you made a promise, but that's really cool you have done that."

Dean then filled her in on the stranger in her home. She found out his name was Jack. She loved that name. She felt it suited him.

Jack felt very intrigued by the youngest Winchester. He had no idea Sam and Dean even had a younger sibling. He wanted to know everything about her.

"Sam who's the girl that Dean is talking to?" Jack asked curious to hear her name.

"Oh that's our sister. She's our half sister, but her and Dean are so much alike she feels like a full sister."

"Oh, she seems very nice. To let us stay here at least."

Jack felt an odd need to know everything he could possibly know about this girl. He didn't know why he just did.

"Yeah, she has a kind heart. She cares a lot about people and their feelings." Sam said a smile growing on his face just thinking about her.

"She seems lonely though. Like she's missing something." Jack pointed out.

Sam never really noticed that before, but it could be that she just misses her mother. She was only 12 when she passed.

"At a young age she lost her mom just like you. She probably misses her a lot."

"Hey guys how about I run out and get some beer and some grub. I really don't have much here right now. I haven't been shopping for a while." She came in suggesting.

Jack couldn't stop looking at her. She was amazing and she had such a story to tell. All he had to do was look into her eyes and see that.

"Why don't Dean and I run out. You and Jack can stay here and set up a table or something. We wouldn't really know where things were anyways." Sam suggested.

Dean looked at him like he was crazy. He didn't want their little sister left alone with the son of Lucifer.

"Dude really?!" Dean shouted when they entered the hallway.

"She'll be fine. Don't worry. He just wants to get to know her. Plus I really want her to come home. She has spent so much time here, she hasn't even seen the Bunker yet. I feel we have missed quality time with her. Time we won't ever get back."

"I know, but Jack and her? I saw the way she looked at him dude. She is going to fall and he is going to hurt her."

"If that happens we'll interfere."

"Fine." Dean agreed reluctantly.

"So Jack, how's it feel to be babysat by my brothers?"

"It's quite interesting. I don't mind it though they both seem very nice."

"They are, but Dean can become very opinionated at times. Sam is gentle and kind hearted. He will look after you quite well. Sam is always the nurturing one."

"Yeah he is. He has been telling me that I'm not who my father was, but who I choose to be."

"Exactly only you get to decide that. Dean may have his opinions, but I can see there is not a bad bone in your body."

Jack appreciated her kind words. He still saw that she was lonely, but he didn't know what to do to make her not so lonely anymore.

"You seem very nice and kind hearted like Sam. I see more similarities between you and him rather than you and Dean. Yet, I feel something in your life is missing, much like Sam and Dean."

"It's love Jack. Because the life we live, we can't have attachments. For I have tried, I can't seem to find the right one for me."

"You will. You're kind, and beautiful, and amazing."

"That's very sweet of you Jack. I don't think it'll happen though. I'm not destined to be with anyone."

"Y/n you will find someone. This life won't take that away from you." Sam said startling her.

"We want you to live a normal life. Not the one we live." Dean chimed in sounding guilty.

"I want to be in this life. It's all I know. Even when I've been at school I still hunted. I don't want the normal life anymore. Jack is right I am missing something. I'm missing my brothers. I want to come home. Forever."

Jack felt he knew her now. She was a family person. She just needed her family.

~*~

Y/n had been living at the Bunker for a couple months now. Jack had taken off because of a hunt gone wrong.

Y/n was worried about him being out there on his own. Luckily, Jody had a lead on him and they were headed out to find him.

"I just hope he's okay. I have been so worried about him being out in the world by himself."

"Of course you have." Sam teased.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Yeah, what is that supposed to mean? You aren't pushing Jack on her are you? We've talked about this." Dean sounded worried. He didn't want Y/n to be with Jack, or anyone for that matter.

"I think he's good for her. She's probably opened up more to Jack in his first few months than she has her whole life." Sam said though Y/n could hear every word he was saying.

"You do realize I can still hear you two, right?" She interrupted them.

"Can you tell me I'm wrong then? If you can we'll drop it and leave you two alone." Sam compromised.

"You aren't wrong. But what I tell Jack is none of your business. I tell him things because he listens. When was the last time you ever listened to what I had to say?"

"We always listen to what you have to say." Dean piped in.

"Oh yeah? Then what did I suggest for breakfast this morning?" She quizzed them.

"Pancakes. The thing we had for breakfast." Dean responded not giving it a second thoughts.

"Wrong. Sammy?"

"Breakfast burritos from that restaurant you love so much." He caved knowing very well they both never hear what you have to say.

"Correct."

"No way she totally wanted pancakes this morning..."

She let them argue about this. All she could think about was Jack. She let herself get distracted, but only for a few minutes before her mind wandered back to the nephilim she has grown so fond of. It wouldn't be long before they were reunited.

~*~

Losing Jack was the hardest thing for Y/n. She only hoped her brothers and Castiel had the resources to get him back. She was walking on thin ice with her thoughts. If she didn't talk to someone, but she couldn't talk to anyone about this.

That's when she finally realized how she felt about him. She knew exactly where she belonged.

Though she hated to admit it, she was starting to fall for the young nephilim, and she was starting to fall hard.

She wanted nothing more than to figure out rescue him from this apocalypse world.

Jack wanted to find a way to destroy Michael and get back to his friend. He couldn't help but want to tell her everything he felt close to her. Closer than he ever felt with anyone. Even Castiel.

Every time he thought about her he smiled. He didn't know this unnatural feeling. He didn't even realize he was doing sometimes. It was just natural for her to make him smile whether she was with him or in his thoughts.

She distracted him when he needed a break. It was his way to cool down. Though he didn't know why, it made him feel good. He only hoped she did the same with him.

~*~

Her brothers had the perfect plan in place to save Jack and Mary from the Apocalypse World. It was almost full proof. Almost.

There was only one thing they were missing: Archangel grace. That was the last ingredient standing between her and the boy she had grown to love.

She only hoped Gabriel was healed enough to create the rip. Sadly it wasn't enough. He wasn't fully healed from what Asmodeus did to him.

All hope felt lost. She was never going to see her Angel again.

Tags:

@anotherwaywardsister @archangel-michael98 @atc74 @bella-ca @canadianspnhunter @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog @ericaprice2008 @impala-dreamer @impalaimagining @katymacsupernatural @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @luci-in-trenchcoats @mamaredd123 @masksandtruths @mirandaaustin93 @muchamusedaboutnothing @our-jensen-ackles-love @roxyspearing @sea040561 @snffbeebee @spnwaywardwitch @squirrelnotsam @winchesterprincessbride

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michaelogazie · 7 years ago

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community Fear in Banda Aceh on Decmber 27, 2017. Fear and horror among Indonesia's LGBT community as gay sex ban looms By Ben Westcott, CNN UPDATED February 26, 2018 (CNN) When Ael left home to go to school in Jakarta, his parents warned him to be careful in the big city. "Be a kind person," his mother told him. He worked hard and found a good job as a teacher in the sprawling Indonesian capital, but seven years later the 23-year-old is fearful for his future as a young gay man in a country which increasingly views homosexuality as a sin and, potentially soon, a crime. "Many people don't like us ... they don't like us being more visible, so they are preparing laws that can criminalize us," Ael, who asked for his surname to not be used, told CNN. Within weeks, lawmakers could voteon a new law that looks set to criminalize sex outside of marriage and homosexual sex in Indonesia, as part of wide-reaching changes to the country's criminal code. "If the penal code is approved, I don't know our future in Indonesia," Ael said. It is just the latest move in a widespread crackdown on Indonesia's gay and lesbian community since 2015, which has shocked and horrified the country's LGBT population. Indonesia is the world's largest Muslim-majority country, home to hundreds of millions of followers of the Islamic faith, but until recently it was relatively tolerant, if not exactly accepting, of its LGBT population. But in the last decade a conservative strain of Islam, quietly tolerated by presidents past and present, has gained sway, with conservative Muslim leaders and groups intimidating lawmakers, holding mass rallies in Jakarta and targeting prominent Christian and LGBT minorities. "(Recently) when LGBT Indonesians open our social media, quickly we find there are lots of people speaking hatefully about us," Ael said. "As a gay person and a young person in Indonesia this issue has actually become dangerous for us." The local LGBT community isn't alone in worrying about the developments. UN High Commissioner for Human Rights, Zeid Ra'ad Al Hussein said at a press conference in Jakarta on February 7he was "greatly concerned" about the proposed revisions of the penal code. He said the proposed amendments were "discriminatory" and appeared to be planned for "cynical political purposes." Muslim protesters pray as they burn an effigy during an anti-LGBT rally in Banda Aceh, Friday, February 2. 'Indonesian values and culture' In one of the latest drafts of the bill seen by CNN, committing an "obscene act" with someone of the same gender is punishable by a fine and up to 18 months in jail, if the act is public. It doesn't detail what could constitute an obscene act. If the acts are "publicized in the form of pornography," the sentence could be up to nine years. Activists had breathed a sigh of relief in December 2017, when Indonesia's Constitutional Court narrowly voted down a call for the criminalization of LGBT relations brought by a group of conservative Muslims. But the court's decision now appears to have only been a temporary reprieve. Indonesia's LGBT crackdown JANUARY 2016 Indonesian politicians and ministers begin making public comments attacking LGBT people FEBRUARY 2016 Defense Minister says LGBT rights are more dangerous than "nuclear war" FEBRUARY 2017 Mental Health Director at Ministry of Health says LGBT people have "psychiatric disorders" APRIL 2017 Jakarta governor Ahok loses election to Muslim opponent, amid mass protests by religious conservatives MAY 2017 141 men arrested at alleged sex party in Jakarta under pornography laws MAY 2017 Two young gay men caned 83 times in Aceh for homosexual sex DECEMBER 2017 Indonesia's Constitutional Court narrowly rejects application by Muslim group to criminalize same-sex relations JANUARY 2018 Twelve Indonesian transgender women shaved, stripped in raidon salons in Aceh Sources: CNN, Human Rights Watch, Tempo No date has been set for the vote on the new criminal code, but a conservative lawmaker told CNN strict new restrictions against same sex-relations and extramarital sex will be included, no matter what. "Basically all factions in the Parliament agree on the expansion of extra-marital sex articles and the inclusion of certain deviating acts of LGBT," said Arsul Sani, a politician with the conservative Islamic United Development Party (PPP). Sani, who has a seat on the influential law and human rights panel that will approve the draft criminal code, said criminalizing sex outside marriage and same-sex relations will bring Indonesia's outdated criminal code in line with the rest of the country's "religious values." "Those who oppose (the law) base their perspectives on Western cultures and values, whilst we propose this new criminal code upon Indonesian indigenous values and culture," he said. While many conservative Islamic Indonesian politicians would like same-sex relations to be banned entirely, the existence of large, secular majority parties could lead to the compromise of seeing it only outlawed "in public." Sani's fellow panel member Ichsan Soelistio, lawmaker with the secular Indonesian Democratic Party of Struggle (PDIP), said while it was true there was majority support for the new criminal code, full criminalization of same-sex relations is out of the question. "We (will) still protect their private lives, including their sex life, as long as they don't do it in a public area," he told CNN. Soelistio said the law couldn't reach into people's private lives if there was no complaints from the parties involved. "This will go to a vote maybe around one or two months after our recess, which ends on March 4 ... I believe (the new code) will be good for Indonesia," he said. Despite its widely held Muslim beliefs, Indonesia's population didn't always openly discriminate against LGBT people. "Indonesia has a long history of tolerance towards queer communities. It's always been described as one of the most tolerant countries in Southeast Asia to its queer population," Tim Lindsey, director of the Center for Indonesian Law, Islam and Society at the University of Melbourne, told CNN. But a recent poll by Saiful Mujani Research and Consulting released in January found 87.6% of Indonesians believed LGBT people were a threat to Indonesia, while a 2013 Pew Research poll found 93% of Indonesians thought homosexuality was "morally unacceptable." However despite many citizens' deeply-held Islamic beliefs, not everyone is in favor of the complete criminalization of homosexuality. Jakarta resident, Viana, told CNN that while her Muslim faith prohibited homosexuality she didn't want LGBT people to be sent to jail. "I don't want homosexuality to spread (but) I think it should not be criminalized. Rather people should get better religious education," she said. More than 70,000 people have signed a petition, started by women's rights activists, calling for lawmakers to throw out the new draft but experts say that secular politicians are unlikely to take up the cause. 'Sissies' In recent months Indonesian authorities have grown bolder in their attacks on the country's LGBT population. Before dawn on January 28, police raided beauty salons in conservative Aceh province, dragging 12 transgender women out to the streets. The women were then shaved, taken into custody and forced to act as men. In a video taken shortly after the raid, North Aceh Police Chief Ahmad Untung Surianata speaks to a crowd that gathered to watch the arrests, describing the group of women as part of a "disease." 'Never seen anything like this': Inside Indonesia's LGBT crackdown "This "disease" is contagious and growing ... It is inhumane if I let the number of sissies increase in this area," he tells the crowd. Speaking to CNN days after the incident, Surianata insisted it had not been an anti-LGBT operation but instead a drug raid to investigate reports of crystal meth being circulated in the area. Jakarta-based activist Kate Walton said the violence shocked and horrified Indonesia's already nervous LGBT community. "One concerning element was that the police chief said he had the right to do this because he had consulted with Islamic leaders beforehand," she said. "So people are starting to ask -- who is really in charge in Aceh? The government or the religious leaders?" The rise of powerful Islamic conservatives in Indonesia, mostly unopposed by senior politicians, has emboldened authorities with a low opinion of LGBT people to act against them. An Indonesian man, one of two to be publicly caned for having homosexual sex, is punished in Banda Aceh on May 23, 2017. Hundreds of Indonesian men have been arrested by police in raids on gay saunas and private events across Java, ostensibly for breaking pornography laws, while local media reported more than a dozen LGBT apps have been made unavailable inside the country at the government's request. UN Human Rights head Zeid said he found the recent "extremist views" playing out across Indonesia "deeply worrying," during his visit in February. "Accompanied as they are by rising levels of incitement to discrimination, hatred or violence in various parts of the country, including Aceh," he said. "Islamophobia is wrong. Discrimination on the basis of religious beliefs and color is wrong. Discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or any other status is wrong," he said. Police: 141 men detained during sex party raid 00:49 'We should fight together' It's no coincidence the brutal crackdown on LGBT Indonesians and the showdown over the criminal code comes just before a series of national elections, set to take place over the next 14 months. Indonesia's 'archaic' penal code Lawmakers in Indonesia have been trying to agree on a new version of their criminal code for years -- to replace the system of laws first put in place by Dutch colonists. "Imagine running any modern country with a code which was written in the 1880s. It's not going to work," Tim Lindsey, director of the Center for Indonesian Law, Islam and Society at the University of Melbourne, told CNN. He says the outdated code imposes inappropriate penalties which are no longer used because they're archaic or fines that are ridiculously low. So far attempts to bring together Indonesia's fractious national parliament to fix the code of laws have been unsuccessful. "There hasn't been consensus on a range of difficult issues from the death penalty, to religion and blasphemy, to defamation," he said. The National Alliance on Reform of the Indonesian Criminal Code (Reformasi KUHP) was formed in 2005 to address this very issue, but even they have come out against the current draft of the new code. The organization said it was concerned the new criminal code could negatively affect Indonesia's democracy and freedom of expression, while harming the country's "vulnerable groups." Local elections for governors and mayors across Indonesia's dozens of provinces are due to take place in June 2018, while Indonesian President Joko Widodo faces a battle for re-election in April 2019. Indonesian politicians are scared to oppose conservative Muslim groups after they were instrumental in the toppling and imprisonment of once-popular Jakarta governor Basuki Tjahaja Purnama, also known as Ahok, in May 2017, Human Rights Watch researcher Andreas Harsono said. "Many Islamist leaders are going to put pressure on every politician (to pass the criminal code) ... Many politicians in a conservative country like Indonesia will think twice before standing up for an LGBT individual," he said. It isn't unusual for harsh rhetoric against minorities such as LGBT Indonesians to be used prior to an election to gain votes, but unlike in previous political cycles, experts believe the current hostile environment could be here to stay. There is no confirmed date for when the final vote on the criminal code will come, or what form the final legislation might take. A vote was postponed in mid-February and activists say it could take place in April, when the next plenary session in Indonesia's parliament is scheduled.

community Fear in Banda Aceh on Decmber 27, 2017. Fear and horror among Indonesia’s LGBT community as gay sex ban looms By Ben Westcott, CNN UPDATED February 26, 2018 (CNN) When Ael left home to go to school in Jakarta, his parents warned him to be careful in the big city. “Be a kind person,” his mother told him. He worked hard and found a good job as a teacher in the sprawling Indonesian capital, but seven years later the 23-year-old is fearful for his future as a young gay man in a country which increasingly views homosexuality as a sin and, potentially soon, a crime. “Many people don’t like us … they don’t like us being more visible, so they are preparing laws that can criminalize us,” Ael, who asked for his surname to not be used, told CNN. Within weeks, lawmakers could voteon a new law that looks set to criminalize sex outside of marriage and homosexual sex in Indonesia, as part of wide-reaching changes to the country’s criminal code. “If the penal code is approved, I don’t know our future in Indonesia,” Ael said. It is just the latest move in a widespread crackdown on Indonesia’s gay and lesbian community since 2015, which has shocked and horrified the country’s LGBT population. Indonesia is the world’s largest Muslim-majority country, home to hundreds of millions of followers of the Islamic faith, but until recently it was relatively tolerant, if not exactly accepting, of its LGBT population. But in the last decade a conservative strain of Islam, quietly tolerated by presidents past and present, has gained sway, with conservative Muslim leaders and groups intimidating lawmakers, holding mass rallies in Jakarta and targeting prominent Christian and LGBT minorities. “(Recently) when LGBT Indonesians open our social media, quickly we find there are lots of people speaking hatefully about us,” Ael said. “As a gay person and a young person in Indonesia this issue has actually become dangerous for us.” The local LGBT community isn’t alone in worrying about the developments. UN High Commissioner for Human Rights, Zeid Ra’ad Al Hussein said at a press conference in Jakarta on February 7he was “greatly concerned” about the proposed revisions of the penal code. He said the proposed amendments were “discriminatory” and appeared to be planned for “cynical political purposes.” Muslim protesters pray as they burn an effigy during an anti-LGBT rally in Banda Aceh, Friday, February 2. ‘Indonesian values and culture’ In one of the latest drafts of the bill seen by CNN, committing an “obscene act” with someone of the same gender is punishable by a fine and up to 18 months in jail, if the act is public. It doesn’t detail what could constitute an obscene act. If the acts are “publicized in the form of pornography,” the sentence could be up to nine years. Activists had breathed a sigh of relief in December 2017, when Indonesia’s Constitutional Court narrowly voted down a call for the criminalization of LGBT relations brought by a group of conservative Muslims. But the court’s decision now appears to have only been a temporary reprieve. Indonesia’s LGBT crackdown JANUARY 2016 Indonesian politicians and ministers begin making public comments attacking LGBT people FEBRUARY 2016 Defense Minister says LGBT rights are more dangerous than “nuclear war” FEBRUARY 2017 Mental Health Director at Ministry of Health says LGBT people have “psychiatric disorders” APRIL 2017 Jakarta governor Ahok loses election to Muslim opponent, amid mass protests by religious conservatives MAY 2017 141 men arrested at alleged sex party in Jakarta under pornography laws MAY 2017 Two young gay men caned 83 times in Aceh for homosexual sex DECEMBER 2017 Indonesia’s Constitutional Court narrowly rejects application by Muslim group to criminalize same-sex relations JANUARY 2018 Twelve Indonesian transgender women shaved, stripped in raidon salons in Aceh Sources: CNN, Human Rights Watch, Tempo No date has been set for the vote on the new criminal code, but a conservative lawmaker told CNN strict new restrictions against same sex-relations and extramarital sex will be included, no matter what. “Basically all factions in the Parliament agree on the expansion of extra-marital sex articles and the inclusion of certain deviating acts of LGBT,” said Arsul Sani, a politician with the conservative Islamic United Development Party (PPP). Sani, who has a seat on the influential law and human rights panel that will approve the draft criminal code, said criminalizing sex outside marriage and same-sex relations will bring Indonesia’s outdated criminal code in line with the rest of the country’s “religious values.” “Those who oppose (the law) base their perspectives on Western cultures and values, whilst we propose this new criminal code upon Indonesian indigenous values and culture,” he said. While many conservative Islamic Indonesian politicians would like same-sex relations to be banned entirely, the existence of large, secular majority parties could lead to the compromise of seeing it only outlawed “in public.” Sani’s fellow panel member Ichsan Soelistio, lawmaker with the secular Indonesian Democratic Party of Struggle (PDIP), said while it was true there was majority support for the new criminal code, full criminalization of same-sex relations is out of the question. “We (will) still protect their private lives, including their sex life, as long as they don’t do it in a public area,” he told CNN. Soelistio said the law couldn’t reach into people’s private lives if there was no complaints from the parties involved. “This will go to a vote maybe around one or two months after our recess, which ends on March 4 … I believe (the new code) will be good for Indonesia,” he said. Despite its widely held Muslim beliefs, Indonesia’s population didn’t always openly discriminate against LGBT people. “Indonesia has a long history of tolerance towards queer communities. It’s always been described as one of the most tolerant countries in Southeast Asia to its queer population,” Tim Lindsey, director of the Center for Indonesian Law, Islam and Society at the University of Melbourne, told CNN. But a recent poll by Saiful Mujani Research and Consulting released in January found 87.6% of Indonesians believed LGBT people were a threat to Indonesia, while a 2013 Pew Research poll found 93% of Indonesians thought homosexuality was “morally unacceptable.” However despite many citizens’ deeply-held Islamic beliefs, not everyone is in favor of the complete criminalization of homosexuality. Jakarta resident, Viana, told CNN that while her Muslim faith prohibited homosexuality she didn’t want LGBT people to be sent to jail. “I don’t want homosexuality to spread (but) I think it should not be criminalized. Rather people should get better religious education,” she said. More than 70,000 people have signed a petition, started by women’s rights activists, calling for lawmakers to throw out the new draft but experts say that secular politicians are unlikely to take up the cause. ‘Sissies’ In recent months Indonesian authorities have grown bolder in their attacks on the country’s LGBT population. Before dawn on January 28, police raided beauty salons in conservative Aceh province, dragging 12 transgender women out to the streets. The women were then shaved, taken into custody and forced to act as men. In a video taken shortly after the raid, North Aceh Police Chief Ahmad Untung Surianata speaks to a crowd that gathered to watch the arrests, describing the group of women as part of a “disease.” ‘Never seen anything like this’: Inside Indonesia’s LGBT crackdown “This “disease” is contagious and growing … It is inhumane if I let the number of sissies increase in this area,” he tells the crowd. Speaking to CNN days after the incident, Surianata insisted it had not been an anti-LGBT operation but instead a drug raid to investigate reports of crystal meth being circulated in the area. Jakarta-based activist Kate Walton said the violence shocked and horrified Indonesia’s already nervous LGBT community. “One concerning element was that the police chief said he had the right to do this because he had consulted with Islamic leaders beforehand,” she said. “So people are starting to ask — who is really in charge in Aceh? The government or the religious leaders?” The rise of powerful Islamic conservatives in Indonesia, mostly unopposed by senior politicians, has emboldened authorities with a low opinion of LGBT people to act against them. An Indonesian man, one of two to be publicly caned for having homosexual sex, is punished in Banda Aceh on May 23, 2017. Hundreds of Indonesian men have been arrested by police in raids on gay saunas and private events across Java, ostensibly for breaking pornography laws, while local media reported more than a dozen LGBT apps have been made unavailable inside the country at the government’s request. UN Human Rights head Zeid said he found the recent “extremist views” playing out across Indonesia “deeply worrying,” during his visit in February. “Accompanied as they are by rising levels of incitement to discrimination, hatred or violence in various parts of the country, including Aceh,” he said. “Islamophobia is wrong. Discrimination on the basis of religious beliefs and color is wrong. Discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or any other status is wrong,” he said. Police: 141 men detained during sex party raid 00:49 ‘We should fight together’ It’s no coincidence the brutal crackdown on LGBT Indonesians and the showdown over the criminal code comes just before a series of national elections, set to take place over the next 14 months. Indonesia’s ‘archaic’ penal code Lawmakers in Indonesia have been trying to agree on a new version of their criminal code for years — to replace the system of laws first put in place by Dutch colonists. “Imagine running any modern country with a code which was written in the 1880s. It’s not going to work,” Tim Lindsey, director of the Center for Indonesian Law, Islam and Society at the University of Melbourne, told CNN. He says the outdated code imposes inappropriate penalties which are no longer used because they’re archaic or fines that are ridiculously low. So far attempts to bring together Indonesia’s fractious national parliament to fix the code of laws have been unsuccessful. “There hasn’t been consensus on a range of difficult issues from the death penalty, to religion and blasphemy, to defamation,” he said. The National Alliance on Reform of the Indonesian Criminal Code (Reformasi KUHP) was formed in 2005 to address this very issue, but even they have come out against the current draft of the new code. The organization said it was concerned the new criminal code could negatively affect Indonesia’s democracy and freedom of expression, while harming the country’s “vulnerable groups.” Local elections for governors and mayors across Indonesia’s dozens of provinces are due to take place in June 2018, while Indonesian President Joko Widodo faces a battle for re-election in April 2019. Indonesian politicians are scared to oppose conservative Muslim groups after they were instrumental in the toppling and imprisonment of once-popular Jakarta governor Basuki Tjahaja Purnama, also known as Ahok, in May 2017, Human Rights Watch researcher Andreas Harsono said. “Many Islamist leaders are going to put pressure on every politician (to pass the criminal code) … Many politicians in a conservative country like Indonesia will think twice before standing up for an LGBT individual,” he said. It isn’t unusual for harsh rhetoric against minorities such as LGBT Indonesians to be used prior to an election to gain votes, but unlike in previous political cycles, experts believe the current hostile environment could be here to stay. There is no confirmed date for when the final vote on the criminal code will come, or what form the final legislation might take. A vote was postponed in mid-February and activists say it could take place in April, when the next plenary session in Indonesia’s parliament is scheduled.

community in Banda Aceh on Decmber 27, 2017.

Fear and horror among Indonesia’s LGBT community as gay sex ban looms

By Ben Westcott, CNN

Updated 0328 GMT (1128 HKT) February 26, 2018

(CNN)When Ael left home to go to school in Jakarta, his parents warned him to be careful in the big city. “Be a kind person,” his mother told him.

He worked hard and found a good job as a teacher in the sprawling…

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