#and the five ghosts are the five missing children :3

[lifeonmvrs]

happy halloween! (it’s always halloween)

[Image Description: digital half body drawing of franziska von karma from ace attorney as foxy from five Nights at freddy's. she has her hands on a jack o'lantern and is smiling. she has small fangs and is wearing yellow contact lenses. she is wearing a red hairband with red fox ears attached to it, a black eyepatch, a red shirt with white collar and cuffs, and black gloves. the background is purple with stars and ghosts.

the second picture is of a pin and poster of the drawing as redbubble products. they are showed in a frame that resembles the structure of an instagram post with the user lifeonmvrs. it has a title reading "already available :3 [cat face emoticon]" and in smaller text one that reads "link in bio [heart emoticon]”. the third picture is the same but the products this time are a sticker and a tote bag. /end ID]

[celuere]

I know if I’m haunting you, you must be

haunting me.

pairing: Ghost!Arlecchino x fem!reader

context: past regrets lead you back to a place you believed to be long abandoned

cw: major character death, doomed yuri, angst with comfort….??? No idea, grief, depression, reader is referred to as Mother by the HotH

This is part of @edgeray ‘s Halloween Special which I’m super honored to be part of! Make sure to check out all the other amazing works from all the lovely people also participating <3

They say everyone grieves in a different way.

That every single method to process the sudden change in your life is a valid one.

It has been exactly five months, one week and six days.

You noticed the pitying and sad looks you‘d get from the children and even subordinates ever since.

Noticed how they whispered behind your back.

„They were just about to get married…“

„Killed by her own child… but that was expected from the Hearth.“

Killed…

Own child…

They needn’t know the truth. That Arlecchino pressured him into a fight on that evening. That the poor boy was forced to make a choice.

Either the House. Or his own life.

When the news reaches you it was already too late.

Her blood was long ago soaked up by the carpet. Her usual hot skin was freezed to the bone.

If it weren’t for the arrow piercing her heart, you’d almost mistaken her for a sleeping beauty.

Lyney was already taken by the Fatui to the HQ.

And Arlecchino was dead.

Peruere Snezhevna was dead.

And your spark died with her.

Today was February 2nd.

Father’s birthday.

You knew it wasn’t his fault. That the guilt must be consuming him. He was always a child of empathy and righteousness but you just couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore without your eyes watering. Without the images of your dead fiancé swimming back up. Without imagining that deadly arrow being released by his own hands.

You just couldn’t. Just as you couldn’t continue to live in that cursed house you used to share. Everything reminded you of her.

That toothbrush next to yours.

Her perfume still consuming the bedroom air.

The untouched side of the bed.

Even the moon reminded you of her.

You moved out in the same week of her death, the building got abandoned only short after.

And still nothing changed for you. You couldn’t handle not being woken up by her soft lips caressing your neck. Not being able to look into those crimson x‘s for one last time.

The sheer thought of the wedding that will never happen in this lifetime was enough to send you into a mental breakdown. No. No you’re not processing her death well.

The children noticed. They always did. Attentive to their Mother, are they not? How you barely ate anything or almost never left the darkness of your new bedroom where you‘d bury yourself in the blankets, wearing one of your old love‘s shirts.

Lyney ordered a doctor to look after you from time to time. That poor child. He missed his mother. And he hated himself for how your situation was nothing more than his fault. He wanted to talk to you. To throw himself in your arms and apologize, over and over. The new responsibilities bestowed upon him weren’t easy for him and without neither of his parents guidance… Self hatred wasn’t enough to describe how he was feeling about his new life.

The doctor or rather the therapist he called for you released after his third visit.

Depression?

Moving on?

You were mourning for fucks sake.

Instead of a doctor now it was Childe. He always came by on Thursdays, maybe even Tuesdays. He got along well with your beloved and as it turned out, is really good at talking you an ear off. He’d take you out to walks mostly, always walking a slightly different route, never repeating your steps. He never once asked you how you’re processing the recent events, but what he did was nag you about his colleagues, mostly Pantalone.

What you didn’t know was that a great part of Arlecchino‘s will was dedicated to you. And how Childe needs to look after you. Along with a whole lot other things such as that you’re status in the Hearth must never be changed. You still got say in important matters. You were still to being addressed by mother.

Today was a Thursday. But Childe couldn’t make it last minute, an important mission in Liyue, they said. But that didn’t stop you from putting on your boots and jacket and go on a walk by yourself.

For the first time in almost half a year.

Spring was just about to begin, the birds slowly returning. It wasn’t necessarily bad weather but also not exceptionally good either. The sun hid behind a bunch of clouds and the wind ruined the hair you put up so neatly.

You didn’t have a certain destination. You just walked. Walked and walked until you came to halt in front of a building you never wanted to see again.

With no one to look after it, the vines slowly started creeping up the walls. A big lock hanging around the handles of the entrance doors… well a broken one. Did bandits already break in to try and rob it of its last memories?

Didn’t seem like it once you pushed the creaky mahogany open. It looked just the way you left it. But dustier.

Usually when you used to walk through here, Arlecchino would already be awaiting you, taking the coat off of your shoulders and place a lovely kiss on the top of your head.

„I hope your day was better than mine, my love.“

It often was. Now every single one was filled with nothing but emptiness and sorrow.

You navigated through the hallways, which were usually filled with children chasing each other, giggling and laughing.

Now there were one or two rats scurrying around on the floor. Lovely.

The house was mostly cleared of anything valuable when the Hearth moved but something seemed off… it was quiet. Not the quiet you‘d expect when walking into an abandoned building. As soon as you stepped over the threshold, the wind ceased to exist outside the manor. The multiple candles lighting up once you passed them also didn’t slip your mind.

Normally, it would scare the living daylights out of you. But now it felt like coming home. It felt familiar.

It felt like her.

Passing through the living room felt like being catapulted right back to that fateful day. The bloodied carpets were already disposed of but the dark stain on the wooden floor was still left.

This is were you found her.

Cold.

And still so utterly beautiful.

Suddenly the engagement ring felt all too heavy on your hand. Almost burning. That’s when you noticed the two teacups on a single table next to it. With brewing hot tea.

„I was wondering how long it will take you to find your way back here.“

Your heart stopped at the familiar voice suddenly behind you. Now you were completely loosing it.

When you whipped around, expecting the empty look into a dead hallway, it almost knocked the air out of your lungs.

They say ghosts are created when the dying soul has regrets so big and powerful that they defy death themselves.

„Now, now… Not even a single „Hello“ from you and you’re at the brink of tears… is that really a way to greet me?“, Arlecchino‘s hand reached over to brush off the salty tears from your cheek, only to reach right through you.

„Ah… I forgot…“

„…What kind of joke is this…?“, analyzing her features, you noticed how she was drenched in a faint, blue light and even transparent. But she was still as gorgeous as ever. If it weren’t for the gaping hole in her chest.

„One I‘d certainly scold the children for. I was surely surprised once I realized my current predicament… I don’t know what is worse. That I’m stuck here between the living and the dead world… or that I left you alone.“, her eyes softened like they always did when they landed on you.

You couldn’t stop the tears anymore. This all felt like a bad nightmare you couldn’t wake up from. Maybe it was. But your heart hoped otherwise.

Goodness, you couldn’t stop crying.

„My sweet dove… how often did I tell you that tears don’t suit your beautiful face? Come on, give me one of those smiles I loved so dearly…“, in between sobs and tears you somehow managed to pull up the corner of your lips into the slightest of smiles. It felt so weird. You forgot the last time you truly, genuinely smiled.

„There we go… My beautiful girl…“, but Arle‘s smile quickly faltered at the sight of the ring of your finger. „Still wearing it, are we…?“

The sobs still escaping your lips made it impossible to form a sentence so you just nodded.

„…“

„I‘m sorry. For leaving you alone in this world. For not fulfilling the promise I’ve given you… I truly regret nothing more than leaving your side…“

Never once in your time together did you hear her so devastated. Never.

Maybe it was wishful thinking. Maybe it was your brain playing a prank on you.

It probably was when you took a big inhale of oxygen into your lungs as you sat up right in your bed. Drenched in sweat and tears. The weight of the ring on your finger so unbearable that you pulled it right off your hand and threw it against the nearest wall.

What a cruel dream. What a cruel world this was without her.

The love of your life was dead and there was nothing to be done that would bring her back.

[snaileer]

Call to my Bedside - 3

Part 1:

When Maddie wakes up with chains around her wrists and a pounding her head, she is surprised to see her family in front of her.

As she blinks in the darkness, ignoring the way her eyes won’t focus, her surprise gradually washes into fast-paced terror.

It’s not just her family in front of her, but also her children’s friends. Her son’s friends.

But her son is nowhere to be seen. Amongst the grime and dinge of the space, there is no unruly mass of black hair.

She counts again. 1, 2-

1, 2,-

Her son exists as a group of three to her.

Jazzy, Jack, and Danny.

Tucker Foley, Sam Manson, and Danny.

But- she counts again.

1, 2-  1, 2-

Her son is not here. Danny is not here.

Her family is injured, Jazz and Jack in one cell and the kids in another, her in yet one more, and her son is missing.

Maddie tries to remember what happened, why she is injured, where they are, why-

There were people, she had fought them, all black clothes and blades, Jazz had come downstairs at the sound, Jack had defended her, Maddie watched them both go down under a blow, the distraction enough- Danny had never come home from school.

Her husband starts to rouse, a low groan.

“Jack.” She whispers harshly, “Jack!”

“Maddie-kins?” Jack mumbles, trying to push himself upright but stumbling when he realizes his hands are bound together by manacles.

His are not chained to the wall like her own, but they are still heavy steel.

“I’m here Jack, I’m alright,” She can see him turn to her in the dim light, “Banged up, but alright.”

Indignant anger flashes across her husband’s face, “Who did this? What happened-those people!” Jack increasingly gets louder, “The ninja people! They got past our ghost barrier-!”

“They’re not ghosts, hun,” Maddie cuts in, making him look over.

Some of his righteous exuberance fades, “Then why..?”

Maddie shakes her head, immediately regretting it, headache increasing as she tries to talk, “I don’t know. But Jack, Danny’s not here, I don’t know where he is, but he never came home, something’s wrong-“

“Danno!” Jack yells, looking frantically over the group through the bars between them.

Finally, his volume seems to rouse the others. Sam and Tucker both wake with a lurch, Jazz soon on their heels with a groan.

“Danny!” Sam yells, looking around them, “They got Danny!”

“And my tech!” Tucker yells, hands patting himself down.

Sam glares at him, “That’s what you’re worrying about?!”

“What, like having a satellite capable PDA wouldn’t be helpful right now!? Danny told us to run, you’re the one who made us stay-!”

“We weren’t gonna leave him-“

“Oh well look at us now, we’re not doing much better than-“

“Kids!” Maddie yells, and their heads snap over to her, “What are you talking about? Where’s Danny?”

For some reason they both seem to glance at Jazz before answering, receiving a hesitant nod.

Sam started, “We don’t know where he is now, but we were walking home and something exploded-“

“We thought it was just another ghost attack!” Tucker cut in, looking increasingly distressed, “But then Danny was fighting off these freaky ninja people, and telling us to run-“

“But we couldn’t just leave him there! We tried to help-

“There were so many, and they grabbed us and then we saw them grab Danny and…-“ Tucker stopped, looking down at the chains on his wrists, “And then we woke up here…Mrs.Fenton, where are we?”

“I don’t know, hun,” Maddie looked at her son’s friend, then to her own daughter, her husband, “But we’ll figure it out. And then we’re going to find Danny.”

Jack beamed at her, his trust in her confidence shining through.

She wished she believed it even half as much.

——

The first time they come, a group of five people, still dressed in black, weapons lining their body, Maddie yells and shouts. Demands they tell her where Danny is. They are silent.

They methodically go to each of their cells in pairs, one pointing a gun and the other setting down a bag of food. Military rations.

She screams and yells the entire time.

When they go to Maddie’s cell last, removing one arm from her shackles so she can eat, she takes advantage, lashing out with a yell and just as much anger as vicious desperation.

She punches the one nearest, a sloppy front kick displacing the other’s gun pointed at her.

Before she can attack again, one arm still pulled back to the wall behind her, the click of a safety coming off silences her.

The rest of the chapter is thru Ao3, cuz Tumblr says its too long. *^*

Tags:

@thecrystallabyrinth @isnt-that-grape @riverdancingwerewolves @mimblizzy @chaos-deimos-et-eris @miraculousandmore2 @mys-tia @jitteryjuttury @moonlight-opal @nerdypaintbrush @thedragonqueen1998 @luminanightfall @cowarddragon @cyrwrites @kamireadsmcu @manapeer @imaginationmademanifest

[razzberrydazz]

🍉Razz's Fundraiser List V7 🇵🇸

Previous iteration of my fundraiser masterlist found here.

Reminder that I am doing art for charity - if you share proof with me that you have donated to any of the fundraisers I have shared either in this post or in my other posts tagged #razz's fundraiser list, I will draw something for you!🍉Please help these families!

I also have personally organized a fundraiser for a family, upon request and discussion with Hana Jad Al-Haq (vetted here, linked here, £28,784/£50,000 goal) and her brother-in-law Sami Hamad (whom the fundraiser is for).

>>>Help the Hamad family get to safety<<<

A family of 3 - a husband, wife, and their infant son - need funds to evacuate to safety. This fund is vetted by association.

I have some of the fundraisers shared on my kofi.

More fundraisers and fund updates below the cut

Updates to some previously shared fundraisers

Update to Safaa's (vetted here) fundraiser found here, was at $7,325/$75,000 as of Aug 13, 2024. It is now at $22,270/$75,000 goal as of Oct 16, 2024. Safaa has her husband, months old child, and sickly parents who all need help to evacuate.

Update for Hanaa/Hana (fundraiser linked here and vetted here) - Hanaa asked me to share the story of her sister-in-law Israa. Israa (@naseer220, @naseranam225) is vetted by association with Hanaa. Link to Israa's fundraiser here. £9,662/£20,000 goal. Israa has two young children and a sick father, and her husband has been missing for over 8 months after being kidnapped by the occupation. Israa's father and children need urgent medical care.

@ghazialamoudi fundraiser here. Ghazi Al Amoudi has reached out to me before to share this gfm, so this serves as an update. Is vetted. €827/€10,000 goal, low on funds!

@abedallhferwanagaza's fundraiser here. (Wife's tumblr is @olaferwana @olaferwana1) Vetted by @/butterflyproject. €10,568/€35,000 goal. Family of five, three are children, husband is separated from family in Egypt and all want to be reunited.

@dodooomar Doaa's fundraiser here. Vetted here. kr264,334SEK/kr500,000 goal. Note, currency is in Swedish Krona, 10$ = 105 SEK. She and her autistic son are in Egypt, but her family is trapped in Gaza. She also has a fundraiser here to help get supplies to restart her embroidery business, and fundraisers here here here here and here to help other members of her family. This post details these campaigns and how this family is separated and wishes to be reunited - Safaa, Hanaa, @aseelo680, @falestine-yousef, and others are all part of Doaa's family and have their own fundraisers (some I have shared before). All are vetted by association. Help the Jad Al Haq family.

@yasermohammad's fundraiser here. He has reached out before to share this gfm, so this serves as an update. Donation protected, is vetted. €26,267/€35,000 goal.

@sabahfamily's fundraiser here. Sabah has reached out to me before, so this serves as an update. Donation protected, appears legit. £8,694/£50,000 goal. Family of 27, many are children.

@abedhilles's fundraiser here. Abdul has reached out to me before, so this serves as an update. Vetted by association, Abdul's wife was a journalist Watan News Agency and was tragically martyred. Also has been vetted by 90-ghost. Abdul has a child named Karam, and urgently needs medical care from injuries sustained from a missile strike. $3,796/$35,000 goal.

@aseel140's fundraiser here. $415/$200,000 goal, low on funds! This fund benefits Aseel’s family’s daily needs like rent, food, and several necessary operations on injuries the family have sustained during the occupation’s attacks. She was separated from her husband, who is trapped in Gaza, while Aseel her parents and older siblings have made it to Cairo.

@aymanbasil2's fundraiser here. Vetted. Ayman is helping his brother rebuild his life after their livelihood was destroyed. €3,597/€15,000 goal.

@amanyay556's fundraiser here. €681/€50,000 goal, low on funds! A family with two kids who want to get to safety!

@ameinababas-blog's fundraiser here. $28,203/$100,000 goal. Amina has 4 children who all have suffered from the horrors of this war. They all want to get their needs met and get to safety.

@ali-manar-family's fundraiser here. (Previous account was @aliandmanarpal) Vetted by multiple sources. kr3,401 SEK raised of kr550,000 goal, low on funds! Note - currency is Swedish Krona, $10 USD = 105 SEK. I have shared this fundraiser before.

@ayahoftheday shared this fundraiser here. €2,955/€30,000 goal.

@mohammedayyads-blog shared this fundraiser here. €4,449/€35,000 goal.

@rewaaamir-family's fundraiser here. Vetted. Rewaa Amir, a mother of five, $149CAD/$55,000 goal, low on funds!

@nisreensuhail's fundraiser here. Vetted. Mother of three who lost her husband. €13,544/€50,000 goal.

@ranensworld's fundraiser here. Mother of three, her children are sick and need urgent medical care. €9,574/€80,000 goal.

@motazmohammed's fundraiser here. Vetted. €3,711/€50,000 goal.

@alihamdi1973's fundraiser here. €2,515/€25,000 goal.

@mohammednasser's fundraiser here. €6,455/€38,000 goal.

@emanalmadhoun7's fundraiser here. $770/$25,000 goal.

[blingblong55]

Merry little Christmas-141

Photo credits:(twitter/X) @/bigmikemw

A/N: Have yourself a merry little Christmas -Kasper <3

---- GN!Reader, platonic!relationship? fluff/comfort? ----

After so much loss, blood, tears and sweat, Task Force 141 found themselves in a cabin, a Christmas tree decorated, a fireplace lit and much laughter filled the room. The once empty and cold cabin now hosted the fond memory. It was the night before Christmas when not a soldier was awoken by night terrors, not even a gun used to inflict harm; the camouflaged stockings were hung by the Chimney with care, in hope that peace would soon be brought to their lives; The soldiers all nestled in their beds; Smoke from cigars now gone as even the eldest of them all slept well.

By morning, the soldiers woke up, Gaz, Price, Soap, Ghost and R/N and to their surprise, Kate Laswell had gifts that greeted them all. Price sat int he sofa first, Soap and Gaz smiling like they won the war. Ghost and R/N walked in with mugs for all to have and through the early morning, they read the letter that sat upon the chimney, opened gifts and smiled to know someone out there thought of them with care.

Gaz received a new hat, multiple actually, one that was happily decorated with the word 'Soccer' the same one he would wear to taunt his best mate for some time. Soap received a football signed and dedicated to him from his favourite team and a letter from his family back home. This of course brought the young soldier to tears as he smiled at the letters his mother so lovingly wrote for him. R/N, received a letter as well, written by Laswell, thanking the young soldier for their sacrifice when they helped Laswell in some past operation and then, the small box held a mask, made just for them. "Just like the one I lost." You recall a past operation, losing a mask and also losing part of yourself. "To the memory of the late R/N and here's to the new R/N, may they live forever." The embroidery read.

Ghost, receiving archived photos of his family, tea bags and Kentucky Bourbon. He chuckles as he remembers sharing a drink with Laswell many years ago and how he found himself sharing his life with her and Price. He holds the bottle, staring at it and smiling, someone remembered him. Price laughs, two boxes of cigars, all from the brand he adores and hidden behind a mug that read, "Soccer lover." He groans a laugh and shows it to Gaz who laughs and shows him the cap that was given to him. "Don't dare," Price points a finger only to have Gaz laugh, "I'm not missing a chance to wear this and annoy you." Now, Price has a gift idea for Gaz's birthday.

A knock on the door and when opened, they find Santa herself, wearing a Christmas hat and her wife behind her. "Good morning, hope you are all hungry for some homemade meal?" She shows the large trays of food, made the night before and for this occasion only. Kate's children run around, playing with the young soldiers as Price helps the two ladies with the table. "You didn't have to, Kate." She shakes her head, "Nonsense, you five deserve this and take it as a thank you for what you and the team have done for me." Kate's wife passes by Price, "Trust me, just take the food and eat, she won't take no for an answer."

Kate sighs, "Just eat, trust me, Martha Stewart helped me make this meal." "The book did, honey," Kate's wife corrects her from the kitchen. "What she said." Price chuckles, "Might as well do that." Throughout the cabin, the children ran around, showing off what Santa had brought them the night before to the young soldiers. Gaz and Soap are stuck playing with Nerf guns and the occasional Barbie break. R/N ran around the dining table, chasing the youngest child of Laswell. "Never seen Ghost so…happy and excited," Price mentions as he observes Ghost have a tea party with plushies and the little girl of Laswell.

"I think this is the first time he likes someone else's tea," Price jokingly says and watches Ghost get a fake tiara on his head. The little girl giggles any time Ghost pretends the tea is too hot and he sighs in relief when her younger brother plays doctor and helps Ghost with the pain.

And now, it is safe to say that for the first time in their lives, they have a photograph that celebrates how for a moment, war stopped, smiling all genuinely portrayed and all in Christmas sweaters as the photo was taken. 'Christmas of '23, TF 141 and The Laswells' the photo has written on the bottom. At this moment, is commemorates a new tradition, Christmas dinners at that cabin, where life is peaceful.

To the team, Thank you for your help and support in operations I have given throughout the years. It is my understanding you all will share a cabin this Christmas and in classic fashion, I have sent gifts for you to open the morning of December twenty-fifth. Times haven't been the greatest to you all but I promise that for at least this very moment, you shall be granted time to care for the other. It is also my understanding that you all consider yourself a family, which is why, by the time you read this letter, you'll get a knock on the door by the very family that considers you all a part of their family. And for all that I love, watch your words amongst my kids, all of you.

May you have a merry little Christmas, Kate Laswell.

Tags:

@eicee @loviie-stuff @liyanahelena @cinnamon-cola @sadieesssss @kitschaosden @wrathofcats @johfaam0 @frazie99 @spicypicklesoh @vampsquerade @tiredmetalenthusiast @jinxxangel13 @enarien @luvecarson @willowaftxn83-87 @saoirse06 @ikohniik

[chimivx]

ghosting ↠ txt

now playing ↠ light my love • greta van fleet

He left you with letters. Envelopes that took you five years to finally read, acknowledge. They take you back through your past, forcing you to make moves not only for yourself, but for your family, for your children… His children.

part three of six ~ masterlist

word count ↠ 2264 warnings ↠ (same for all parts) 18+. mentions of drugs, alcohol, smoking. swearing. explicit sexual content. these people have kids, there’s family talk, pregnancy talk. absent dad, messy family ties. stepsib shit, stepcest. infidelity. if any of these things bother you, please keep scrolling . if i missed anything PLEASE let me know!! a/n ↠ if you are new to this story, don't start here! please go to the masterlist! major thank you to everyone who's read this story. <3 xo posted ↠ 6/12/24 ~ midnight est.

~ september 2020 ~

Four tiny feet pitter pattered on the beige tiled floor behind you as you rounded the corner of the hall into the kitchen. Both in little blue tee’s and diapers, your twins clung to your tail, never letting you have a moment in peace. Now that they were completely mobile, always running instead of teetering everywhere, they were experts in hunting you down. The two were almost two, their birthday only a couple weeks away.

“Mama!” Chan shouted when you paused at the counter, the doors and drawers of the kitchen all made of a rosy toned wood with warm grey tops. “Mama, help!” His words were spoken half correctly.

“Help, help!” Sunoo watched his brother, his pudgy hands gripping the hem of his shirt. He looked up at you with his big brown eyes that had potential to melt you into the floor.

Peeking over your shoulder, giving them a sly smile, your fingers worked at the plastic bag you had slapped to the countertop. Both boys giggled, Chan gripping his cheeks as Sunoo tossed his hands in the air.

As they grew older, as they came into their own, it got easier to tell them apart. Identical in nearly every way, you and Soobin fought through some hard times within their first year of life. Sleepless nights of accidentally swapping them in their cribs, leading into exhausting days of putting the wrong onesie with the wrong name on the collar of the wrong kid… The day they turned eight months old the two of you had had enough and painted Chans middle finger red. 

Now that they were about to turn two, there wasn’t any nail polish needed. The twins took after you in many ways, but it was evident that Chan took after his father the older he grew. His features were softer, rounder. His chin came into the same perfect point, his cheeks and lips fuller than his brothers.

It wasn’t something you dwelled on, unless it was past midnight and you and Soobin were curled in the center of your bed beneath the warmth of the blankets where you’ve shed many tears. As much as they got from you, they got from him, and though Chan seemed to swipe his entire face, you’d have to one day deal with looking him in the eyes, everyday, for the rest of your life. 

That face looked up at you now, and though you were conditioned to yearn at this point, you were on an exciting mission, one your boys were going to help you with.

“You both get one, okay?” Pulling out two hamburger buns from the plastic bag, you handed one to each twin while they giggled and danced on their toes. They stared at the bun in awe, like they were awarded pure gold instead of just simply helping their mother, holding bread. “What are they?”

Sunoo glanced at you and held it up. “Bread!” His tiny shout couldn’t pronounce the R sound.

Chan eyed his brother, then laughed aloud. “Bread!” His shout was the same.

“It’s a bun,” you said with a smile, taking one out of the package for yourself. Two steps away was the oven, and sure enough the twins waddled behind you, watching everything you did laser focused. “Mama’s gonna put hers in here.” 

“Why?” Sunoo asked, pointing at the grey oven. “Mama, why?”

“Why?” Chan parroted, holding his hands out to the side in question. “Why, why?”

Sitting down on the floor, crossing your legs beneath you, the boys squatted next to you. “Because, we’re gonna surprise Daddy, okay?”

“Okay,” they both said, Chan staring at the bread.

“Bun,” he babbled quietly. “Bun, bun, bun.”

“Yes!” Half shouting, both boys jumped. “Oh, I’m sorry,” you laughed, pulling them both into your lap. Sunoo giggled, Chan tried to wriggle away. “Mama’s happy.” 

“Happy?” Sunoo’s little voice mumbled, relaxing back in your hold. His twin froze, then did the same, looking up at you in question. “Mama, happy.”

“Happy,” Chan said, neither twin able to pronounce the first letter yet.

Kissing them over their fuzzy hair that was barely long enough to do anything with, you sighed. “Mama’s so happy,” you said, then blinked a couple times. The unease in your gut, that was most likely simply nausea, rolled through you. This time was already much different than the last. “And nervous.”

“Why?” Chan asked, mumbling the word a few more times, turning the bread around in his fingers, inspecting it. The twins were barely two but had an excellent idea of how to keep conversation already, even if it wasn’t on purpose and just what they were used to hearing from their parents. Sunoo watched you, a calmness within him inspiring your own.

“I think because this time it’s…” You cut yourself short, not wanting to finish any thought that came to your mind. Looking down at your boys, at the two who changed your life forever, who have already taught you so much in their two short years of life, you didn’t mean anything you could say at the end of that thought. 

This time it was real? The babies sitting on your lap, gazing up at you like you’re their whole world were very much real. This time it’s because you’re doing it with a husband and not doing it alone? Soobin’s been around since the start, this time wouldn’t be any different. No thought made sense. There was no reason to be upset, no reason to feel lost. 

Beneath this roof, with these boys, all three of them, you were safe, you were loved, you were taken care of. Adding another little one to mix would be nothing short of incredible.

Amidst your inner turmoil and the boys sitting patiently on your lap, the front door popped open, sending the twins to their feet. Shouting different variations of the word Dada, or Daddy, their little feet took them flying around the corner and down the hall, leaving you behind with nerves shooting through every vein.

Soobin greeted the boys, his light hearted tone warming your heart. “What are you holding? Are you eating those?”

“Bun!” Chan shouted, and you giggled quietly, unmoving from the floor. Tucking your knees into your chest, you bit your bottom lip and waited.

“Yes, bun, good job,” Soobin said, then groaned as the boys laughed. Knowing he scooped them up in his arms, he’d definitely be headed this way. “Why do we have them, is Mama cooking?”

“Mama, hide,” Sunoo told him matter-of-factly. “Mama, bun, hide.”

Soobin made a sweet sound, encouraging them both to keep talking. “Mama has a bun, too? Did she hide it?” Their voices came closer, eventually turning the corner where Soobin spotted you on the floor, failing to hold back a smile. A smirk grew on his lips. “What’s going on?” All you could do was shrug. Chan whined, wiggling around, so Soobin set them both on the floor, stepping a bit closer to you. “Are you okay?” He dropped his chin a bit, a serious glimmer shooting across his expression.

“Yes,” you answered fast, nodding. Soobin nodded back, slowly, then lifted his eyes to the counter and the package of hamburger buns there. “Do you want one?” When he looked back at you, he laughed, utterly confused.

“What?” He reached down toward the boys who were waving their buns at him. “Buns, yes!” Crouching down to be the same height as the rest of his family, Soobin took the buns the boys offered him, then laughed. “What the heck is going on?”

Chan and Sunoo, stepping backward, both proud that Soobin had taken their offerings, had folded their hands over their chests, then looked at you. “Mama, bun, hide,” Sunoo said again, pointing at you.

“Is this a new kitchen game, or something?” Soobin asked, furrowing his brows. 

Shaking your head, you pressed your lips together. “Not a game.”

“Mama, bun, hiiide!” Sunoo drug out the words, bouncing on his knees.

Soobin shot him a wild look, and decided to finally play along. “Oh no! Where is it?” Chan laughed maniacally, then skipped toward the oven. Sunoo watched him, then followed, running to his brother's side, throwing his arms around his back. “Show me!”

Looking at you for approval, you bobbed your head. “Show Daddy, go ahead.”

“I swear, if this is some prank to scare me,” Soobin muttered, glancing at you.

A grin erupted over your face. If you had to pick your favorite thing you’ve learned about him over the years, it was how easily scareable he was. “I promise, it’s not.” You hoped. 

This had the potential to really scare him. 

Chan gently pushed his brother off of him, then pressed his face against the window on the front of the oven, his nose squishing against the glass. Sunoo copied him, taking up the space next to him. Soobin let out a soft laugh at their faces, then shook his head.

“Where is it at?” He sat on the floor and scooted closer to the boys, moving behind them. Taking them both by the waist, he pulled them onto his lap and side eyed you. The twins covered their cheeks and laughed, the sound echoing off the walls. Folding your hands together, the skin clammy, you squeezed your own fingers and gulped. “This game is… easy!” Soobin tickled the boys, one hand on each belly, and they giggled incessantly. “I’m going to win!”

“Daddy, win! Win!” Chan shouted, his high pitched voice making you laugh.

Soobin, shifting Sunoo into the middle of his lap, reached up for the handle on the oven and pulled it open, revealing the hamburger bun on the center grate. Gasping aloud, twins shouting with excitement, Soobins eyes squeezed shut with laughter. After a moment of the boys losing their minds, he gave you a look.

Heart rate skyrocketing, electricity buzzing beneath your skin, you couldn’t ease your smile. “What?” You asked in the quietest voice.

Soobin looked at the bun, then back at you. “What do I win?” The twins sat up in his arms, babbling nonsense to each other while watching their parents converse. “I found the bun.”

Your jaw dropped open. Taking a look at your masterpiece, an idea you stole from the internet, you huffed a laugh. “What is that?”

Soobin did a once over of the dormant oven. He shrugged. “A hamburger roll in the oven?”

“Bun!” Sunoo shouted before grabbing Chan's ankles, the two attempting to wrestle on their giant of a fathers lap. 

Soobin widened his eyes and smiled. “Bun, right, a hamburger bun in the oven, thank you, Sun.” Meeting your gaze, your half disappointed, half amused gaze, Soobin adjusted his posture, sitting up straight. “What?” He sighed, seemingly defeated. “A hamburger bun, that’s in the oven.”

Moving closer to him, you whispered, “Just a bun.” Sliding a hand over his thigh, dragging it over his pants and then around his back and up the back of his shirt, you smiled at his sudden flusteredness. “It’s just a bun, Soobin. Where is it?” His brows nestled in the center of his forehead, his eyes darting to your lips for a second. “In the oven,” he said, tone lower than ever before.

“Who’s oven?”

Hesitating, his booksmart brain doing the math, he whispered, “Our… oven.” The room grew quiet, the twins having resorted to chewing on their fingers or inspecting their little toes. Soobin blinked twice, thought to himself, then, all at once, the puzzle clicked. “Your’s, holy crap,” he whispered in a rush, spinning on his bottom to face you, the twins laughing as they moved with him. “Your oven, there’s a bun in… Oh my god?”

Leaning into him, over the twins, caging them beneath the two of you, you smiled. “We’re having a baby.” Tipping his head backward, eyes squeezing shut, he sighed. After a few moments of the boys patting him, asking him what was wrong, he took their hands to soothe them, then gazed at you with teary eyes. 

He couldn’t say much, you knew if he tried he’d cry. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you pressed a kiss to his lips, a long one that triggered some tears anyway. Pulling away, touching your forehead to his, you drug your thumbs over his cheeks and whispered, “You’re gonna be a dad.”

Soobin’s face lit up for a moment, then pulled into a sure as ever smile as he cradled the twins. “I already am.”

10/7/2021

…At least that’s what Taehyun told me! That you love your new sister so much. Hard to believe you weren’t even three yet before she was here. I’m excited for you, to have a sister. I only grew up with a big brother. Now you guys are the big brothers! It’s your responsibility to protect her. She’s got a great dad, and we already know she’s got the best mom. That makes you guys the best big brothers. You’re getting older now, you’re becoming your own people, that’s… that’s so cool. I hope you guys are the coolest kids around. But, I also hope you guys are the happiest kids. When I see you, you’re laughing, and it’s the most amazing sound I’ve ever heard in my life. Still baffles me that you’re here, that you’re mine. I think about you everyday. I’m gonna get it straight at some point, I promise. I’m gonna do it for you. It’s gonna be okay, we’ll be okay. Hug her, love her, she deserves it…

☼ AO3 | wattpad | support | share with me ☼

thank you so much for reading. <3

[muffinlance]

So, how does Zuko wind up at the Tree of Time in Chaos Avatar to bust Vaatu out? Didn't you say the start is pre-banishment, post-mom gone? What, does he, as a descendant of Roku, have enough of a knack for spirit stuff to fall into a meditative trace while hiding at the turtleduck pond and missing his mom or whatever, and poof! He's at the Tree of Time?

FINALLY someone asks for the START. You are correct that the turtleduck pond is involved. <3

* * *

The turtleduckling had disappeared the day after mother did, but at least Zuko knew where it had gone. But he still wasn’t talking to Azula. 

“You have to talk to me sometime, Dum-Dum,” she said.

He crossed his arms, and stared at the remaining ducklings as they hid under a bush on the opposite side. There were four left.

“It was an accident, I didn’t even see it, and anyway it should have moved. You have to forgive me for accidents, moth—”

Mother said so. But they didn’t talk about mother anymore. 

Azula sat down next to him. She crossed her arms, too. And puffed out her cheeks, and glared, and he did not look like that. Not that he was paying attention to her. 

He was paying attention to the turtleducklings. Because… because there were five.

Azula went very still next to him.

The fifth turtleduckling had a darker shell and feathers, like it had been rolled in ashes. It waddled into the water, heedless of its parents' warning quacks and the two children the rest of its siblings were hiding from. 

Quack, it said, and paddled merrily along. 

Quack, it said, and disappeared like it had swum behind a screen. Except the screen was a normal patch of water and air, and he could see straight through it still. No fifth turtleduck.

“Is our pond… haunted?” Zuko asked.

“I thought you weren’t talking to me,” Azula said, but it was more of a reflex, as they both stared. Then, more sharply: “What are you doing?”

Zuko was standing up. He found a pebble and, without a mother to re-advise him against throwing rocks into certain ponds, launched it towards the spot they’d last seen the ghost duck. 

Quack, quacked an extremely offended quacker, who was still out of sight. The rock had disappeared, too, with no ripple on the water to show it had ever landed.

“...Dare you to go in,” Azula said.

“How stupid do you think I am?”

“I don’t think you’re stupid,” Azula said. “But a coward? That remains to be seen.”

Zuko glowered. Azula smirked. …Zuko started rolling up his pants.

“I wasn’t serious,” she snapped. “And I take it back, you are stupid,” which meant that now he was definitely going in. “Father is going to be angry when he sees you in wet robes,” she said, as he toed off his shoes. “And I’m not covering for you,” she said, as he caught his balance on the first slimy algae-covered stones, “and I’ll demand the servants attend me so they won��t be able to help you change, and—”

By then he was near the center of the small pond, and poking at air. His hand disappeared.

“I hope it hurts,” Azula said. She was on her feet now, with her arms crossed even more firmly over her chest.

“It just feels… normal? Maybe a little cold? It doesn’t—oww!” 

He jerked back his hand, complete with one ghost turtleduckling clamped over his palm. 

“Oww oww oww,” he shook it, and shook it, but it wasn’t coming off, and then he tripped on a stupid slimy rock and fell sideways—

“I’m not coming after you!”

—into somewhere that wasn’t the palace gardens at all. He’d fallen in water, but it was a shallow stream now. The day was colder, the wind stronger and drier. And there was a tree, up ahead.

The duckling dropped off his hand, and paddled away. Zuko barely glanced after it.

That was a very, very big tree. A purple light pulsed at its bulging, split-barked core.

“Hello, mortal,” the tree said.

At which point Zuko scrabbled backwards until he splashed back into the stiller, warmer, deeper water of the turtleduck pond.

“Evil tree,” he told Azula.

“Dum-Dum,” she said, and stomped off. 

By the time Zuko got inside, the servants were busy drawing their little princess a warm bath. He was made to wait his turn.

* * *

“I am unaware of any records pertaining to… evil trees,” the sage in charge of the royal archives said. 

“What about the spirit world?” Zuko asked.

* * *

The ghost turtleduckling swam with impunity between realms. And stole entire loaves out of Zuko’s hands, before fleeing on its tiny paddling feet to the safety of the other side.

“Hey!” 

It had learned that Zuko wouldn’t follow. Neither would its equally hungry siblings.

* * *

A place of death could form a rift, if the spirit did not realize its own passing. If it still desired to return, and was unaware of the general impossibility of the task. Spirits worked mostly on not realizing they couldn’t do a thing. 

“Oh,” Zuko said, to the scroll.

As this was a more common occurrence with animal spirits than with humans, who tended to overthink things even in death, it did not help Zuko narrow down his mother’s location.

* * *

Azula had stopped coming to the pond. And they had different bending instructors, now; father said a private tutor would stop her from being held back by… others. She preened.

Since Zuko was left alone at his lessons, he had a private tutor now, too. It didn’t feel like a reward.

* * *

“...Hello again, mortal,” the tree said, its voice oozing like a courtier’s. “Do come in. No need to be shy.”

“Are you evil?” Zuko asked, only his head poking through the rift.

“Such terms rarely apply to spirits,” the tree said, exactly like an evil tree would. “Consider our meeting, rather… an opportunity. Is there something you require assistance with? You would not have found yourself in this part of the spirit world, if I could not help. Perhaps we could— Mortal, come back here—”

Zuko pulled his head back out. It was definitely evil. But he’d gotten a better look at the patterns on the glowy purple part, so he sat down on the pond’s edge, and drew them before he forgot. He’d brought paper this time.

Maybe he wasn’t a good bender. Or heir. But there was an evil tree in the royal turtleduck pond, and he wasn’t a coward. He’d take care of it.

* * *

The sage in charge of the archives blinked. Took the paper from him, and blinked again. 

“Yes,” he said. “Yes, I believe I have seen something like this. Come.”

The scroll was old. So old it wasn’t even the original: it had been copied, and had time to grow old all over again. The sage fretted over every crackling inch they unrolled.

“Where did you say you saw this design?” the sage asked.

“...I, uh. Dreamed it?” Zuko said.

They stared, together, at an inked drawing of the Avatar’s patron spirit. 

* * *

…If Zuko found the Avatar, father would definitely like him better than Azula.

* * *

“Mortal,” the evil tree greeted, much less cordially.

“Are you the Avatar?”

“What,” it inquired, with a sort of rustling tree sigh, like it was already disappointed in his answer, “is the Avatar?”

Oh. So… no.

“It’s just, there was this picture in a scroll, of the Avatar’s patron spirit. And they looked like you, except without the tree, and white—”

“Raava,” the tree hissed.

Which had probably been the kanji that he hadn’t recognized. But neither had the sage, so it must have been a really hard one.

“Tell me about this… Avatar,” the tree said.

And maybe Zuko should have gone back to the training grounds to practice his katas more. Or read over the next chapters in his textbooks again, so he’d actually understand them when his instructors went over them tomorrow. But he was still sore from the extra sets his master had assigned as remedial instruction after Zuko had embarrassed them both in front of father. And sometimes when he read ahead he thought too much and got all the wrong ideas in his head, like the time he’d asked why Sozin hadn’t formed a coalition of other nations against the threat of the Air Nomad army. And that just made more work for his instructors to fix, so.

So Zuko sat down, on the stream bank nearest his escape route, and talked to an evil tree.

“They’re the master of all four elements,” he said. “The last one was an enemy to the Fire Nation, and the new one’s been hiding, probably because he’s too much of a coward to face us—”

* * *

He brought an extra loaf of bread next time. One for the ducklings who needed it, and one for the duckling who just thought she did. The ghost duckling tugged and tugged against his grip, before grudgingly clambering up to eat in his lap.

She was really soft.

She bit really hard.

“How many of these… Avatars… have there been?” the evil tree asked.

* * *

“How many Avatars have there been?” Zuko asked the sage.

“Nigh uncountable,” the man said. “Have you had more dreams, my prince?”

“Um,” Zuko said.

* * *

“A lot,” Zuko told the tree. “The sage in the archive said the histories don’t go back that far. He guessed there were at least a hundred.”

“...And how long does your species of mortal live?”

“Avatar Kyoshi lived a really long time. But most of us don’t live more than seventy or eighty years. And some of the Avatars probably died a lot sooner than that, if people resented their meddling as much as the textbooks say.”

“Seven thousand years,” the tree said. “At least.”

And then it got really quiet, for a long time. Which was natural for a tree, but not for an evil tree. Zuko sat with it. He’d brought his homework, so he wouldn’t be wasting his study time.

…Except he kind of did, because apparently ghost turtleducklings could sleep—or at least, dream of sleeping?—and this one did it right in his lap.

* * *

They had flambéed quail-shark for dinner, and Zuko had almost been late, but father was too busy watching the flames to notice him sliding onto his cushion. Azula did.

“Look,” she whispered, “a dead bird can firebend better than you.”

* * *

“Flambé,” Zuko scolded, trying to pull half a loaf of bread out of the mouth of a ghost turtleduckling intent on choking herself.

“...What is ‘flambé’?” the evil tree asked.

And, after Zuko was done with that explanation: “What is… ‘taste’?”

* * *

“I need a recipe book,” Zuko told the sage. “With pictures.” 

“I… of course, my prince. But first, would you like any of these?”

The man had set out a whole table of toys. Most were wooden. They all looked really old. There was another sage there, one of the ones from the high temple. He was just kind of standing there, watching them for some reason. 

“Thanks,” Zuko said. “But I’m too old for toys.”

They both watched him leave.

* * *

“Which turtle do you hail from?” the tree asked.

“I… don’t know?”

The tree sighed. “Air. Water. Earth—”

“Fire!” Zuko said.

“Yes,” it said drily, “that is the final option.”

“No, that’s… that’s what I bend. I’m from the Fire Nation.”

“Ah,” the tree said, in its oil-slick voice. “The element of power. A fine fit, for such a promising young larva.”

So today was going to be one of those days.

Zuko crossed his arms. “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” he said, “but if you keep trying to make me evil, I’m going to go back and practice my bending some more.”

“No need for anything so dramatic,” it said. “But I would wager that there’s something you need more power for. Some task to do, or someone to impress. Perhaps someone to… surpass?”

Azula was two sequences ahead, now. Father had rewarded her with an even better tutor. They were very famous, or something. 

“Perhaps we can help each other,” the tree said.

“Do you want more water?” Zuko asked. Because he’d been sitting here day after day thinking how dry the ground was, even with the stream, and the stream was actually really far from the tree’s roots. Maybe that was why it looked so dead. Maybe it wasn’t evil, it was just really thirsty. “I could dig the stream closer. I saw farmers doing that, when mo— When we toured the countryside, when we were younger. They said it was good for the plants.”

“I…” the tree said, like that was not the response it expected. “No, larva. I do not require more water.”

“What else do trees need?” Zuko asked.

“...I am not the tree. I am inside the tree.” 

“Oh. Oh. …You can come out, if you want. I’ll try not to be scared.”

It was silent again. And then it was laughing, but not a funny laugh. And then it was shouting, and Zuko knew better than to talk back when someone was shouting at him. 

“I cannot simply come out. I have been trapped here, alone, for millennia beyond your comprehension, and…”

The spirit stopped, and took in great big breaths, which wasn’t a thing father or his tutors did until they were done yelling. The spirit had stopped itself early, without Zuko apologizing even once. 

“...Is that why you’re lonely?” He’d thought it was because it was a tree, and evil trees without many leaves probably didn’t get many visitors. But being inside a tree probably wasn’t any better.

“I am not lonely,” the not-a-tree growled. “Listen, human larva. I will grant you power beyond your mortal imagining. You can be that Avatar you speak of, if you join with me. All I require in exchange is to not be in a tree.”

* * *

“Could someone who isn’t the Avatar learn the other elements?” Zuko asked the sage.

“...I suspect,” said the man, looking somewhat tired, “that the most likely explanation for such a phenomenon would be that this person was the Avatar. I happen to have a book here, with select personal accounts of how those who came into the knowledge prior to their sixteenth birthdays adjusted to the situation. If you would be interested.”

Zuko scowled, because that wasn’t helpful at all.

* * * 

“You’re never going to catch up, Zuzu,” Azula said. “But I suppose you could come train with me, if you asked nicely. My new tutor believes in the benefit of sparring, even against lesser opponents. We don’t even need to ask father, so long as you can refrain from embarrassing us both.”

“Mmhmm,” said Zuko, who was thinking.

“Well?” she snapped.

“Sorry, what?”

His sister stomped away.

* * * 

She wouldn’t talk to him at dinner, which was normal, because she always talked with father then.

She wouldn’t talk to him at any other meals, either, which wasn’t. Father wasn’t even there for those, it was just them and the servants who silently scurried in and out.

She didn’t even barge into his room to read his essays over his shoulder and laugh. …Or read the play scrolls they’d smuggled out of mother’s room before the servants had cleaned it, and laugh together. 

* * *

The servants were polite, but father hated for them to waste time on idle chatter.

Uncle was still missing. 

The sage in the archives kept looking at him funny.

“Could we spar sometime?” Zuko asked Azula, because he missed training together.

For some reason, that made her ignore him even harder.

* * * 

Flambé nibbled at his pant legs, then bit his ankle, then waddled petulantly away. Zuko hadn’t brought any bread, this time. 

“I don’t think power would help me,” Zuko said. Not unless it could make him smart enough to learn faster, or help him find mother, or fix whatever in him was so broken that father didn’t even like to look at him. “But… would you like to see the rest of the turtleducks? The not-dead ones.”

Flambé quacked derisively from the side.

“No,” the probably evil spirit said. “I do not desire to see more turtleducks. One is quite enough.”

“...Maybe the garden? It’s nice.”

“No, I—” it said. And then it paused. And got out its oily voice again, like that was something that it needed with Zuko. Maybe it didn’t know how else to talk when people were being nice to it. “...Yes. Yes, I would enjoy seeing your delightful little garden. Simply place your hand into the tree, and…”

“And?” Zuko asked.

“…This is a permanent thing, larva. Beyond even your single miniscule lifetime, as your so-called Avatar discovered. Are you certain?”

“Yes,” Zuko said. And stepped past the banks of the stream, and marched right up to the tree itself. He pushed his hand into his friend’s prison. 

Someone that wouldn’t ignore him, who couldn’t leave him. Zuko had never been more sure in his life.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

“Vaatu,” whispered the oil-slick voice, inside his own mind.

[martellspear]

Hey! I love your blog and your dedication to Elia Martell as a character. I have read your fics on ao3 and absolutely loved them. And I was wondering if you had any recs for us Elia enjoyers out there? Canon-compliant or AU it doesn't matter I just want to consume Elia content like there is no tomorrow <3

hi, anon!! thank you for your sweet words, they mean a lot and i'm so happy that you enjoyed my fics 💗. i haven't read many fics - studying is getting in my way -. but, i'll share a list of my favorites ones and my bookmarks.

* warning: it's LONG

First of all, I'd recommend checking Failed_to_Deanon, she's insanely talented and has a lott of elia-centric works

A Farewell by Ramzes - one shot

In the morning of Rhaegar's departure for the Trident, Elia Targaryen makes a surprising discovery about her husband and their marriage.

The Sun Rises Again by amn_elfire - fanfic - 10/?

After her death, the Seven give Elia the task of saving her people from Rhaegar and Lyanna's folly with the opportunity to avenge her children by sending her back in time to before her betrothal with Rhaegar was ever arranged. Or With her prior memories still vivid in her mind, Elia sets out to prevent the events that led to the deaths of thousands while never forgetting who was at fault for the deaths of her children. But she isn't the only one.

All Too Well by starboundheart - fanfic - modern!au - 1/?

Five year after a fairly clean divorce, Rhaegar decides its time for a family vacation - to Summerhall. Under the guise of his children needing to know each other. But as always, the man has ulterior motives. Or does he?

Elia's House of Ghosts! by biohazard603 - fanfic - 3/?

i can't wait to read this one!!

Elia buys her first house! She has always been drawn to that old abandoned tower, the Tower of Joy, and now it was finally hers! Too bad she doesn't know or remember the ghosts that were there first. or Modern AU where Elia buys a haunted house.

clear the board, reset the pieces by lostchildofthenewworld - fanfic - 9/9

All they ever wanted was the opportunity to go back and do it right, to allow themselves to be happy.

The wolf burned like the heat of the sun for her alone by Redroses123 - fanfic - 10/?

Rhaegar has to get rid of his wife so that he can be with the woman he loves. He does this in mad Targaryen fashion. Elia finds herself hitched for life to the second son of Rickard Stark. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise she doesn't understand yet. How will this change fates design. NOT FOR RHAEGAR FANS

Repercussions of the First Sin by Sunspear22 - fanfic - 27/?

It started with a blue crown...

The Bereaved Dunes by aurasjournal - one shot

this one is so beautiful

In the Bereaved Dunes, where shadows weep, A tale of love and sorrow, bound to keep. Elia, my sun, in your memory I tread, Through sands of despair, where tears are shed. I should've taken you far away, my dear, To Dorne's warm embrace, where skies are clear. But fate had other plans, a cruel twist of hand, In the Bereaved Dunes, where sorrows expand.

What if you go, what if you stay by Biggestscarinyourback - fanfic - 4/4

She listens to the eyes of violet and sits down. Her husband's eyes are almost this colour too, she reflects again. But not half as bright, certainly no laughter in them. His are darker, cold as they are soft, a confusing contrast that gives her no reprieve. They should have been burning, The Last Dragon they had called him and yet he lacks any and all fire in those eyes, as far as she has seen. The blood of the dragon runs hot, they had declared, she has it too, running in her veins, burning. A bittersweet look into Princess Elia Martell's life amongst dragons and lions, from the day of her wedding to her tragic demise.

Lazarus in the Sun by Anonymous - fanfic - 3/?

The Princess of Dorne is a marked woman. With her husband victorious at the Trident yet somehow still missing, now more than ever does Elia Martell find herself stuck between a rock and a hard place: to stay in King’s Landing with herself and her two children at the hands of a madman, or to take the jump and escape? A spur of the moment decision turns into a years-long deception as Dorne wrenches her way out of the Seven Kingdoms on the back of a lie. And though peace is finally taking root once more in this corner of the world, no sooner do the gods laugh when an unexpected figure from the past comes back and unsteadies the ground beneath them all.

Hourglass by spearsndragons - fanfic - 11/?

Elia dies and awakes on the day of her wedding. Armed with the memories of her previous life, she is determined not to let them come to pass. She will make the Seven Kingdoms regret they ever underestimated her. In another part of the Red Keep, the Gods of Old Valyria send Rhaegar back in time to fix his wrongs and ensure the survival of House Targaryen. Rhaegar knows his madness and hubris led to the destruction of everything he loves and cares for. Never again. OR AU: The Gods and fate reverse the hands of time. Elia seeks retribution and Rhaegar endeavors for redemption. In one life, they were husband and wife. In this one, they might just be each other’s biggest adversaries. But, while Elia and Rhaegar plan to prevent the tragedies that befell them, they find out they are not the only ones who were given a second chance. And not all who came back are their friends.

we fall apart as it gets dark by sunstealer (TheSunsetStar) - fanfic - 2/?

this one is SO dear to me <3

The apparent abduction of Lyanna Stark sets off a chain of events: Brandon Stark and his allies march to the Red Keep, where Brandon demands Rhaegar's head. A duel is called by Aerys, and fire serves as his champion, leading to the death of Brandon's father and Brandon's own imprisonment. It's only after these events that a letter arrives at Winterfell, written by Lyanna herself, explaining that she left of her own accord. The deaths of the Lord of Winterfell and the Heir of the Eyrie, along with Aerys' demand for the heads of Robert and Ned, ignite a rebellion. Elia, isolated in Kings Landing without her children, must play her role as the dutiful wife. However, complications arise when the man who once demanded her husband’s head becomes her constant companion, the Kingsguard sworn to her. Will she stay true to her duty or follow her husband's example and forsake it?

Sunset Embers by spearsndragons

Five years into King Rhaegar I's reign, the realm prospers under his progressive leadership. However, the same cannot be said for the king's family. Behind the walls of the Red Keep, Rhaegar grapples with his inner demons, and House Targaryen continues to be haunted by the war's tragic end. Water magic resurfaces across the sea in the Golden Empire of Yi Ti for the first time in centuries with the arrival of the Emperor's new wife. She works to uncover the forgotten history of the world, only to realize that her own past refuses to be buried. OR Dark AU: Is this love or a curse? To yearn for freedom while willingly chaining ourselves to someone, finding solace in the very shackles we can't bear to break?

wherever the wind blows by TheSunsetStar - 1/1 (part of a series)

Rhaegar comes back to her, bringing along a wife and child. Ashara comes back to her, grieving the loss of a child with wolfsblood. Oberyn also returns to her, having just returned from his journeys across Essos, offering words of apology. Everyone returns, yet her daughter never does. or in her desperation Elia gives her daughter to Varys and never sees her again.

Reckless by sunstealer (TheSunsetStar)

"Get out," she tells him. "Leave." "You're not going to talk to me?" His voice comes out hoarse; she wonders why. "You've done enough!" she lets out. He looks disappointed when she says it, his eyes clouding over. She almost apologizes for snapping at him. But she reminds herself that he shouldn't be here at all, he shouldn't be here with her. "Goodbye, Rhaegar," she says gently, not allowing any trace of emotion to surface in her voice. The name sounds foreign coming out of her mouth, as though it belongs to someone else. She wishes for the days to go back to before he met Lyanna. Before everything turned sour. Before it was too late. or Rhaegar returns to her but things are difficult now.

Baelon the Cruel and His Queen of Love and Beauty by sunstealer (TheSunsetStar) - fanfic - 6/?

Baelon Targaryen, the second-born son of King Aerys and Queen Rhaella, and the twin brother to Crown Prince Rhaegar, possessed an ethereal beauty expected of one with Valyrian blood. Yet, behind his captivating face, an aura of cruelty and ruthlessness lingered, casting an unsettling shadow over his reputation. And his sudden appearance at the Tourney at Harrenhal unknowingly changes everything. (or just a crack fic about Rhaegar's 'cruel' twin brother and his shenanigans at the famed Tourney at Harrenhal)

Right Where You Left Me by TheSunsetStar - fanfic - 19/19

elia is dead in this one, but she's so important to the story and i love this fic, so it makes the list :)

Rhaegar's life is spared by the valiant intervention of Arthur Dayne, moments before Robert deals the fatal blow. With their lives preserved, Rhaegar and the remaining Targaryens seek refuge on Dragonstone, eventually making their escape to Essos. Regrettably, Rhaegar is forced to leave his eldest daughter behind. Left in the midst of her adversaries, Rhaenys grows up surrounded by those who view her as an enemy. As time passes, she becomes entangled in the treacherous game of thrones, particularly in the aftermath of Cersei and Jaime Lannister's public execution for their incestuous relationship. Caught in a web of schemes and deceit, Rhaenys finds herself compelled to employ similar tactics in order to ensure her own survival.

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

Just finished watching the FNAF movie (hooray for early UK release!) and I unironically loved it. Some things I want to mention…

Spoilers under the cut!

MATTHEW LILLARD AS WILLIAM AFTON 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

JOSH HUTCHINSON AS MIKE SCHMIDT 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Honestly me just losing my fucking shit whenever there was a reference to the lore/games?!?! Like I was SO excited it was unreal

THE TOREADOR MARCH?!? FOXY SINGING?!? BALLOON BOY?!?! VANESSA?!? THE FREDDY LAUGH?!? THE “IT’S ME” WRITTEN ON THE MIRROR?!?

Not gory at all tbh like there’s a couple of scenes involving blood but most of the kills cut away before showing anything (there WAS a scene where Freddy chomped someone’s torso in half but you only see her bottom half afterwards, like the bite happens in the shadows)

There were, in fact, five nights at Freddy’s (and one day) (yes I counted lol) and absolutely nothing of particular scariness happened on Nights 1 or 2, Night 3 was cute, Night 4 started off cute but got sad and then Night 5 was kind of terrifying, kind of funny, kind of fucking awesome and filled with lore

They definitely missed a trick by not mentioning the Bite of ‘87 (or ‘83? Idk) or Golden Freddy but I know there MIGHT be a sequel so… 👀

I spent the whole of the movie trying to figure out who the fifth child/animatronic was 💀 like obviously Freddy, Chica, Bonnie and Foxy… was the fifth one the fucking cupcake?!?!

The cupcake was kinda goofy but I loved it all the same

The animatronics went from villains to not villains to villains to not villains again like what a journey

Look most of my FNAF knowledge admittedly comes from watching Markiplier and JackSepticEye playthroughs but since when was Vanessa William Afton’s daughter?!? Also is Vanessa THE Vanny???

Going into soft play with the pre schoolers at work is NOT going to be the same after this film 💀

Literally all of the people in the cinema freaked out when Springtrap appeared oh my god

We have come SO FAR since the SFM fanmade videos of William Afton in the Springtrap suit getting springlocked and dying surrounded by the ghost children in the animatronics like holy shIT?!?!

“I always come back” - cue the 20 people at the 10:50am showing I was in absolutely losing their fucking shit

In the sequel (if there’s a sequel) I DEMAND more Matthew Lillard as William Afton/Springtrap like yeah he’s dead but FLASHBACKS!!!! Prequels?!? So much potential there. What I’m trying to say is that we deserved more of him, he was amazing but only there at the beginning and the very end, that’s my top complaint tbh

Not that scary to be honest but there’s some jump scares

I will say this, it definitely felt VERY campy at times, like there were moments involving murderous animatronics where we were all giggling in the cinema

Abby (Abi?) was VERY cute and sweet but also I wanted to shake her like you fucking idiot why are you going up to the scary ass animatronics?!? Stay in the office with your sleeping brother

The fact Mike still has custody of his sister after their aunt was presumably murdered in his home is not adding up but hey ho 😂

Is it the best movie ever made? No, but it was enjoyable for me so I call it a win

If anyone has any questions or wants to talk about it, feel free to hit me up, I won’t be able to reply until just over 4 hours time though as I’m about to head into nursery and do a shift so… yep!

[sparks-olivarpente]

Byler Fics List: the Grown-ups

I adore Stranger Things adult characters, here are some fics where they play an important part:

Until you wake up by Roxhylee Will is in a coma and Mike visits him every day. This one has some of the most thoughtful Ted-and-Mike chapters and an interesting take on Ted <3

Wedding at the End of the World (What do We Have to Lose?) by Julia_Skysong "Hang on, hang on," Jonathan interrupted, frowning slightly. "Let me do the math here. You've only been a…thing, for like a few days? And you want to get married?" "Dude, you're gonna get a new step-dad! Argyle cheered, trying to high five him. "Please for the love of GOD let me officiate this," Murray cackled. OR Joyce and Hopper decide to have a spontaneous wedding at the end of the world and help their kids figure out love and life.

Bananas and Closure by @tired-bisexual-brainrot Hopper runs into Diane while at the store. He invites her over for dinner, and she finds out that he now has a whole family with three kids and a wife.

No Cure for Queer by AlabasterInk (@alabasterswriting) Will Byers had about thirty minutes between realizing that the butterflies in his stomach came from appreciating Mike’s smile a little too much, to walking into his house and hearing Hopper say, “…wrong, Joyce. A guy with another guy. We used to arrest queers, you know…” And it all went downhill from there.

california show your teeth by @fireflywitch Fourteen months after a rash of unexplained disappearances tore an Indiana town apart, a new chief of police and his very normal, nothing-to-see-here family moves to Hawkins from Lenora Hills, California. "I wondered what it would be like if the Byers, El, and Hopper had grown up in Lenora Hills instead of Hawkins and moved to Indiana later on - how things would be different and what things would stay the same and which characters might be better off or worse off…" for Claudia and the Moms <3

You May Be the One Place I'm Sure About by elsie (the_technorats) the one where Joyce Byers and Jim Hopper finally have a moment to themselves. no byler here but you should read it all the same ;)

mom, i'm gay. wait, you are too? by dragons_like_smores @howtobecomeadragon “What if there are no men out there for me, Michael?” Mike, not focused at all on his mom, said absentmindedly, “Then maybe you can just date a woman.” Or: Mike unintentionally starts Karen's lesbian awakening while he simps for his boyfriend, Will, all summer long.

poor old jim's white as a ghost by AttaboyLuther Even when he started on the force back in 1980… Jim Hopper knew there was something special between William Byers and that brat Mike Wheeler. (AKA: Mike and Will fall in love, told through the perspective of one Chief Hopper)

and if you wanna cry or fall apart (i'll be there to hold you) by Strangerangels Mike Wheeler and his relationship with Will Byers, as told by Joyce Byers. Inspired by that scene in S2 where Mike holds Joyce and leads her into the car. Y'know, the one where Bob dies. You just know Mike is going to be the best in-law Joyce will ever have.

The Darkest Eyes by @light-lanterne a semi canon-compliant character study of mike wheeler, his unaddressed trauma and his relationship with will byers, told through the eyes of a very tired jim hopper who can’t help but to become attached to the boy who keeps dating his children.

The Right Thing by Nymphadoragreenleaf The second pregnancy was a mistake. They were basically at breaking point with only Jonathan and Lonnie didn’t want to have to work even more when he had already fulfilled his side of the bargain. He married her and they had a kid. What more did they expect from him (or Lonnie pov)

Benny's also by Nymphadoragreenleaf Officer Powell grimaces “The trespasser… he’s- chief it’s your misses youngest- the one who went missing a few years back.” (or Hopper pov)

some more Hopper: it's me, hi (everybody agrees) by @livsindelusion or 5 Times Mike Gets The Shovel Talk and 1 Time It's Will

and some Joyce! can't hold out forever by scorchstorm five times that others noticed how mike felt + the one time that will did.

Have fun reading :)

[juneberrie]

things i liked about the fnaf movie!!!!

josh hutcherson!!!! bf!!! babygirl!!!

cupcake biting everyone in SIGHT while chica stands there like a proud mother

foxy's dudumdumdudnduddum thingy

mike schmidt

bonnie's little thumbs up after he falls 😕👍

silly willy afton doing the scream knife clean swipe thingy

FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDYYYYYSSSS IS THIS WHERE U WANNA BE??? I JUST DON'T GET IT WHY WOULD YOU WANNA STAY FIVE NIGHTS AT FRE

the fuckin lawyer dude looking like he regrets his life choices during every scene he was in

the night guard 🤗 he was kinda hot ngl

"i... always come back" and then he fucking dies <3

balloon boy just showing up randomly?? hello???

the missing children being silly

FRITZ CROSBY (foxy) BEING THE SILLIEST EVER

susie (chica) literally just being there. icon

the springlock scene!!! she spring on my suit till i lock

things i didn't like about the fnaf movie (not in like an EW BOOO TOMATO TOMATO way more like a oh... way 😕)

chica was in the kitchen and she never said "pizza" in her little voice :(

freddy's ghost child possessor thing being blonde??? and bonnie not being the blonde one??? in my opinion (im gonna make this short because i could talk forever about the kids) freddy is brunette and bonnie is blonde!!!

vanessa.... afton ....... loud incorrect buzzer sound

"together... we are fnaf!!!!" "lets do this fazgang!" "friends never abandon friends.." "its fazzin' time!" "maybe the real fnaf was the friends we made along the way" "he's RIGHT behind me isnt he 😨" made NO appearance and im insulted

markiplier should've been in there somewhere.

abby's hair what the fuck was that

THERE WAS ONLY ONE (1) FNAF SONG???? they should've put more :(

the freaky ass torture machine.... sorry that shit scared the things out of me

[rubydubydoo122]

Jason gets de-aged because I've seen fics of Tim or Dick being de-aged, and Bruce losing his memory, but no one has realized the potential for angst if you de-age Jason.

Zatanna had something come up. So of all people she could have sent to replace her, she sent Constantine. Bruce really didn’t know if his luck could get any worse. At least 15 year old Jason liked his accent. 

Constantine was a really capable sorcerer, he was just really hard to work with. Worse than Hal Jordan. Though, if they wanted to get Jason back to normal, they would have to accept Constantine. 

“Hey, Batman! Go back down into the cave, and send Bruce up. I want him instead of Brood and Gloom.”

Bruce was suddenly brought back to the breakfast table. In all of his 41 years of living, he had never seen Alfred smile this big, “That’s my boy.”

Jason beamed at that.

Bruce’s phone pinged. He didn’t even have to look to know it was Dick sending him a ‘Rule #2’ . That’s all his messages with Dick consisted of. Mostly rule #2’s, some rule #3’s, and the occasional rule #1. All in all, Bruce was doing relatively good. He was definitely avoiding Jason more, but if he was around him too much, the only thought that started to fill his brain was his cooling body in his arms. So he toed the line. And he doesn’t think Jason noticed all that much, because whenever Bruce wasn’t with him, one of his children was.

“Constantine’s coming instead of Zatanna.” Bruce finally said, “I think I should be allowed to brood a little bit.”

“ Don’t get your knickers in a twist , old man.” Jason actually had a really good Liverpool British accent, “Mr. Constantine’s not that bad.”

“I just hate magic.” Bruce didn’t grumble. He was too old to grumble like a toddler.

Jason looked himself over and then put a hand to his chest in fake offense.

Bruce’s phone pinged again, “Dick, will you stop that!” 

But it wasn’t Dick, because Dick was holding a fork and knife in his hands and mid-bite.

Bruce dug out his phone.

“ Is the bloke with the sparkly fingas here? ”

That earned a snicker from Duke, Dick and Tim.

Bruce stood up at the same time Tim said, “I’ll give you five dollars if you say that to his face.”

“Oh! Abso–”

“..Lutely not, Jason. To the cave. Let's go.”

Jason slid out of his chair without noise and followed.

Constantine was already in the cave, and smoking a cigarette. 

“Hi, Mr. Constantine!” Jason practically glided down the stairs, as Bruce strode down at a normal pace.

“Hello there, Jason. I reckon you were a bit taller the last time I saw you. Bruce.”

“Constantine. I’m assuming Zatanna filled you in?”

“Yeah yeah yeah. I’m offended you didn’t call me first. I thought we were mates.”

Bruce just raised an eyebrow. Constantine squirmed a bit, and Jason shot Bruce a grin. A grin that was so reminiscent of the way Jason used to look at him after he cuffed a bad guy. Before Fellipe Garzona had fallen off that roof. Before Gloria Stanson had hung herself.

“Alrighty! Let's check out what kinda curse you’ve got going on. Brucie, would you mind taking a couple steps back, love?”

He did, and as soon as Bruce was out of range, Jason was surrounded in a dome of golden runes. Bruce didn’t miss the way Constantine frowned.

“What’s wrong?”

“The little birdie here has a lot of magic knotted all up together.” Constantine started searching through the runes, “Was it you or the Demon child that– Aha, knew it was you. Your soul’s got dimensional ripples.”

Jason frowned, “Heh?”

Bruce blinked, Dimensional ripples? Clark, Lois, and Jonathan had somehow been transported to this dimension before their souls had merged with their counterparts… who had died. Was that what happened with Jason? Maybe he should talk to Barry when all of this is over.

“And you’ve got some leftover Lazaru– Blimey! You have access to the All-Blade?”

Jason shrugged, “I don’t really like beyblades.”

“That’s not what the All-Blade is. It’s–” A set of runes began to glow, and the borderline fangirl look on Constantine’s face immediately dropped. “Jesus...”

“I have access to Jesus?” Jason touched his forehead, then his left shoulder and then his right, “Thank you, father, son, and the holy spirit. Amen.”

Bruce ignored Jason’s prayer, “What’s wrong?”

The dome of runes disappeared, “...I’ve got good news and bad news?”

He gave Constantine a look.

“Um, good news is, the spell looks like it’ll wear off on its own…” Constantine tried for a sheepish smile, but immediately dropped it, “bad news is, it isn’t supposed to? The magic is interacting with the dimensional ripples, and I can’t touch any of it because it’d be like…”

“Disarming a bomb?” Jason supplied. And Bruce had to suppress the urge to flinch at that analogy.

“Yes. Yes exactly, but one wrong move–”

“Boom.” He mimicked an explosion with his hands. ”But you said it’ll wear off on its own, so it’s fine. Right?”

Constantine winced and a ringing was starting to form in Bruce’s ears as he grabbed Constantine by the tie and started dragging him up the stairs.

“Stay here, Jason.”

“Bruce–”

“I said stay !” Jason flinched at his tone, but Bruce and Constantine were already in the study. “Explain.”

Constantine fixed his tie, “Whatever magic he got hit with didn’t just affect him physically, it also affected his soul. I think, if we’re going off of what happened to Clark and Lois, his soul merged together with his soul from an alternate dimension, causing it to be all… rippley. I can’t fully tell what it’s going to do, but in a couple of days, it looks like it’ll in about two or three days? There’s a 50/50 chance– or I guess, a 25/25/50 chance– that he’s going to either go back to normal, stay this way or…”

It was the 25th. two days from today would make it…

The 27th of April.

It suddenly felt like the ground underneath them was turning or tilting, or hell, both.

Bruce had gotten him back. He’d gotten him back, he can’t leave again. He can’t lose him again, he can’t die again.

Jason found it very rude that Bruce and Constantine were obviously leaving him out of the conversation about him. It completely baffles him how Bruce was raised by Alfred, yet had no manners. He wasn’t even subtle about it. 

Constantine said the spell would wear off. So why did he look like he was about to say something was wrong. Like really wrong. Sure, trying to tamper with whatever was going on would be… bad, but they weren’t gonna mess with it. They would just wait for it to wear off.

Would he physically go back to normal, but he would never remember the past five years? Or was he slowly going to become younger and younger until he was just a literal fetus flopping around on a table? 

Why won’t anyone tell him anything? It would be so much easier if they did. 

Jason eyed the Batcomputer and then the stairs. There was no one else here, no one to stop him from learning by himself.

He opened up the batcomputer, and the first thing he noticed was that everything was filed differently. Instead of being alphabetical, the missions were sorted into who had the mission and the date. For some reason, Jason’s folder had the least amount of missions under it, even though the folder itself was older than Duke’s. 

Still, he clicked on it, only to find that the oldest mission was less than a year ago. Not helpful.

Maybe if these were sorted recently, some of the older mission reports that he did with Bruce would be in Bruce’s folder.

Bruce’s most recent mission was called “Fun Sized Jason”. Guess that would be him. Jason clicked on it and… Bruce is a much sadder man than Jason had given him credit for. And Jason was currently upset at Bruce for snapping at him, and Bruce had obviously snapped because he was being broody. This man. Couldn’t even follow his own rules.

Rule #3 Don’t let Jason know something’s up between your relationship with him 

What was ‘up’ between him and Bruce? If anything, Bruce has been a lot more patient with him.

Unless Bruce was acting. And Bruce could act, Jason had seen him at Galas.

No. He couldn’t have been. Bruce had said he’d give him the world. And he said it in the way that made Jason know he was telling nothing but the truth. 

But that first night Bruce wouldn’t even look at him.

No. Bruce had to have been telling the truth.

But the longing and the guilt and regret… Maybe Jason had done something to Bruce, the same way he did something to Tim and Damian. Jason still didn’t know what exactly that was, just that he felt bad about it.

Jason exited out of that mission statement and started scrolling down to April of 2018. And there were a lot of cases. A part of Jason was glad they were re-organised by date because it would’ve taken a lot more work to try to figure out the name of the file, and then find the file.

Ethiopia: Sheila Haywood, the Joker, and Jason Todd – 4/24/2018- 4/27/2018

Bingo. The first date lined up with the last date in his notebook. He double clicked on it, when a locked symbol came up followed by a space for a password.

Great. Just perfect. 

He tried the password Bruce used on most things.

Wrong.

Bruce’s birthday?

Wrong again.

Jason’s Birthday. Since the file seemed to be about him.

Oh yeah! Who has the best guessing skills? Jason does. He did a little victory spin in the chair, but when he went to look back at the computer, there was a Tim shaped wall blocking his view.

He tried to look around him, but Tim shifted to block him again.

“Timmy, Timbooo, my favorite brother-o. You’re blocking my view, Hermano.”

Tim gave him a look that was scarily similar to Bruce’s bat-glare. 

Jason tried to look around him again, but suddenly, he was being tossed over Tim’s shoulder, and they were moving farther and farther from the computer.

“Hey! I was obviously in the middle of something!”

Tim snorted, as he started up the stairs. “I could bring up a spreadsheet of all the times you’ve done this to me. We’d be here for hours.”

Jason licked his finger and twisted so that he could stick it in his ear. Good news was, it made Tim let Jason go. Bad news was, it made Tim let Jason go, and sent Jason tumbling down the cave’s stairs.

“Jason!”

Lucky for Jason, he was a fast recoverer, and made an immediate beeline to the computer. 

After escaping Arkham Asylum, The Joker had made his way to Ethiopia. Jason had come across the information that Sheila Haywood was his birth mother. Haywood had been a doctor who was working at a refugee camp, also located in Ethiopia. Without my knowledge or Alfred’s, Jason traveled to meet up with his mother. 

Jason and I had managed to cross paths in Ethiopia, when we soon learned that Haywood was being held ‘hostage’ by the Joker. I went to go check on some other thing that had come up, and I had told Jason to stay put, but instead he had gone to attempt to save Haywood. Which led to Jason getting hurt by the Joker.

Jason started to scroll down more, the screen went black.

Tim was standing next to the outlet with the power cord in his hand.

Suddenly all the scars on his hand looked interesting, “Is.. Are most of my scars from the Joker?”

Jason heard Tim’s feet shuffle across the flood of the batcave, “I don’t think I’m the person you should be having this conversation with.”

“But it was bad enough to the point where I needed a Lazarus pit to get better. It was bad enough to the point where I had to stop being Robin.” Because why else would Tim start hanging around the manor when he was 13? Why else would Bruce adopt him? “And you were Robin after me?”

A beat, “Yes.”

He thought back to the conversation he had in the bathroom with Tim, “So, I didn’t grow out of being Robin. I was… forced into retirement. By the Joker.”

“That’s… the easy way of putting it.” Tim took one of Jason’s hands, “I want to show you something.”

They both went over to the locker area and Tim opened his locker and pulled out a shoe box from the top. “I guess since you knew I was a little stalker back in the day, there should be no reason for me to feel embarrassed for showing you these.” He moved to the bench and opened the lid. 

Inside the box were a bunch of photos of Batman and Robin. Of Bruce and Jason. Tim handed him a couple. The first one was of Jason when he had just become Robin. He was talking animatedly while walking with a teenage girl. He remembers that night.  Her name was Angela, and she had been followed for a couple of blocks by a bunch of older guys, and Jason couldn’t let her go home alone. Not with how cruel the streets could be. 

The next one was of Jason cradling a baby. The mom had been separated from the baby during an Ivy attack. 

The last one Tim had handed to him was of Batman and Robin in an Alley. They had just taken down a bunch of thugs, and Jason was talking with the two kids, Gavin and Evan, while Batman was farther off, with a fond smile on his face, looking at Jason. 

“Robin is the light to Batman’s darkness. Hope to his fear. Every Robin gave light, but out of all of us, you shined the brightest. You were the people’s Robin, you cared about them so much, like each and every one of them are your brothers and sisters.” Tim pointed at the picture in Jason’s hand, “Your light was so bright, you made Batman smile. And that isn’t the only picture I have like that.” He put his hand on Jason’s elbow, “I could never come close to the Robin you were, but I always tried. You were like the Sun. And I could never take your place. Not really, but I tried my best to do what I thought you would. To make you proud. Even though… you didn’t really like me when you found out.”

“No. I like you. It’s just…” Jason could feel his eyes burn, “If I got hurt, really bad, bad enough to the point where I couldn’t be Robin anymore, why would Bruce let there be another one? When- When it could happen again? Or even worse. ”

Tim closed his eyes, “When the Joker did what he did to you, it sent him down a dark path. He was barely holding back his punches and he was barely dodging them either. Batman needed a Robin and—“

“I wasn’t there.”

“No! Jason, it wasn’t your fault. You were going through some of the worst moments of your life, it wasn’t your job at that time to be Robin, or emotionally babysit Bruce while he fought crime to deal with his trauma.”

“But you were, what? 13 at the time with no legal obligations to him. It shouldn’t have been your job either.”

Tim blinked, “ah, fuck.” He sat criss cross on the bench and turned so he was fully facing Jason, “point is, it was just a bad time. Bruce kicked Dick out of the Manor, The Joker had diplomatic immunity, which still does not make sense to me, but then he was sent back to Arkham. Bane broke Bruce’s back, some psycho took over being Batman and would not let Dick and I in the cave, but then Bruce got better and became Batman again. Superman died, but then he came back. Then Bruce got framed for murder, and then the riddler and clayface teamed up with this whole convoluted plot which involved Clayface showing up as you and trying to kill us and Bruce probably needed therapy, but he was too much of a stubborn ass to ever actually go.” Tim finally took a breath. 

Jason blinked, “That’s a really rough five years.”

Tim groaned and leaned his head on Jason’s shoulder, “That was only two.” 

“Then it was probably a… shittier five years.” Jason patted his head, “Thanks, Tim.”

Tim glanced at Jason, “For what? I literally just trauma dumped on you.”

Jason shrugged, “Yeah, but you also gave me more information about what the hell is going on around here than anyone has in the past two days. Maybe a lot of the things that happened sound horrible, but it’s better than not knowing. Ya know?”

Jason felt Tim nod, “I’m sorry we’ve been keeping it all from you. It’s not something Bruce likes to talk about, and for Dick being the next adult who isn’t emotionally constipated, he evades certain topics like the plague.”

Jason snorted, “Wanna know something I’ve been completely baffled by?”

Tim sat up, “What?”

“Dick isn’t… wallowed up in angst. Him and Bruce haven’t had a single argument, and Dick…he’s a lot different. So is Bruce.” Jason thought about it for a moment, “Am I different too?”

Tim smirked and dug out his phone, “Mentally, Emotionally, or Physically?” Tim angled the phone so Jason could see, and it was a picture of a man, kneeling and talking to a little girl. There was a red helmet on the floor, but the man had a domino that covered his eyes. Tim swiped to the next one, of older Jason helping an old lady across the street. He swiped again to a photo of him holding Damian in a firefighter’s hold. “You might be a lot rougher around the edges, but everyone changes with time, especially with the things you’ve gone through. Yeah, you might be different, but I think you’re still the same in the ways that it counts.”

Jason looked at the photo. Without the domino, or the helmet he could really see how he had grown into his features, “I look a lot like my papi,” He looked back at Tim, and then pointed upwards to where Bruce had gone, “But I think I learned how to help from my dad.”

[freddy-and-friends-au]

The Freddy & Friends Askbox is now open!

——————————————

An introduction to Freddy & Friends:

Freddy & Friends is an AU created by Roux36 Productions set in the Five Nights at Freddy’s IP.

As opposed to focusing on a single “what if?” question for the AU, F&F is a rewrite of the FNAF story in its entirety, constructed from the ground-up to tell a more realistic, character-driven take on the original story.

——————————————

What asks will I answer? (Examples provided)

Lore (Ex: How do the spirits work?)

World-Building (Ex: Who made the pizza recipes at Freddy’s)

Headcanons (Ex: Who’s Jeremy’s favorite music artist?)

Art requests? (Not sure about this one yet… but maybe?)

Character Asks!

Ask a question from within the Freddy & Friends universe, and it’ll be answered by the creator of the Fazbear Franchise, HENRY ███!!!

(Preface by saying “Dear Henry,”)

———————————————

Click the keep reading to learn more about the Freddy & Friends AU! >>>

——————————————

How much thought did you put into this?

It’s not that I’m a massive nerd, but it’s just that I’m actually a massive nerd.

Animatronics are loosely grounded in real-world mechanical engineering, giving them plausible designs for them to have existed in the 1980’s (down to the very components that make them function.)

The restaurant itself has regulations and procedures to manage the animatronics during the day (this varies depending on the restaurant).

The restaurant layouts themselves have been redesigned to be more coherent with the rules of architecture.

The animatronic characters themselves have their own lore and personalities within the cartoon world.

I have a full list of employees who worked at both Afton Robotics and Fazbear Entertainment.

The rules of the spirits are grounded in real-world cultural beliefs, as well as typical ghost hunting traditions.

No character is written to be two-dimensional. The characters don’t just do stuff for the plot; they do them because it’s in-character for them to do so. They’re not just ghost children haunting the animatronics. They’re also human.

———————————————

What IS canon?

Basic media taken into consideration:

Five Nights at Freddy’s

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2

Five Nights at Freddy’s 3

Five Nights at Freddy’s 4

Five Nights at Freddy’s: The Silver Eyes

FNAF World (Surprisingly)

Five Nights at Freddy’s: Sister Location

Five Nights at Freddy’s: The Movie

Details Only taken from:

Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria Simulator

Five Nights at Freddy’s: Help Wanted

Five Nights at Freddy’s: Security Breach

The ideas of these media are the content detrimental to the story of Freddy & Friends. However, the story of them has been changed so drastically that canon knowledge is considered unreliable when talking about the Freddy & Friends AU. Some things remain the same, but it’s recommended that knowledge of canon game/book/movie events NOT be used as a reference unless I have stated otherwise.

What’s the same?:

Mike Schmidt and Abby Schmidt’s character have remained almost exactly the same as in the movie. (Movie)

Michael Brooks is Golden Freddy (Novels)

Elizabeth Afton being killed by Circus Baby (Games)

The Bite of ‘83 (Games)

The Bite of ‘87 (Games)

Bonnie is blue

What’s changed?:

Note: not all changes will be mentioned here, due to spoilers. The reason they’re spoilers is because I will elaborate on them in future media and short stories.

Michael Afton does NOT exist—replaced by Fritz Afton

FNAF 4 Crying Child becomes the Puppet

FNAF 4 Bullies are the Missing Children

FNAF 4 Bullies are NOT bullies

The haunted animatronics have personalities, and are capable of verbal speech.

Sammy (Charlie’s twin brother) was killed instead of Charlie

Charlie is NOT an android

Very few employees (including night guards) actually died at Freddy’s

The animatronics are limited by the technology of the 1980’s, and therefore have software limitations that aren’t present in the games

Circus Baby’s Pizza World has been renamed to Circus Kingdom Pizza World

The names of the Funtimes have been changed to align with the re-theme

The Funtimes were NOT built with the intention of kidnapping children

The Funtimes are haunted

The Scooper does not exist

The FNAF 4 gameplay is a dream, and not child experimentation. (It is something more than that, but I will not elaborate further, due to spoilers. ;))

The Toy animatronics have been renamed to the Junior animatronics

The Junior location is Freddy Jr’s Pizzeria

The individual Junior characters have in-universe names beyond “Junior Freddy” and “Junior Bonnie”, etc.

The Juniors are haunted

There is no such thing as “Remnant”.

Vanessa Shelly is NOT William Afton’s Daughter

Steve Raglan and William Afton are two different people

Removed Herobrine

(Aforementioned name changes):

Circus Baby - Circus Sadie, AKA Sadie the Circus Princess

Funtime Freddy - Freddie the Ringmaster

Funtime Foxy - Foxy the Flying Fox

Toy Freddy - Freddy Fazbear Jr.

Toy Bonnie - Riley Rabbit

Toy Chica - Penny Pecks

Toy Foxy/Mangle - Bridget the Fox

——————————————

Thank you!

If you made it to the end, I wanna thank you for showing interest in this AU! I’ve been working on it ever since I was 11 years old, and I’ve just turned 20. It's been a long road with at least five rewrites and twice as many redesigns!

More Freddy & Friends content will be coming soon, in the form of:

A webcomic for the main narrative

Cinematic content

A VHS series

Short stories

Audiobooks for said short stories

A website to be!

The askbox is now open! There is much to tell, so ask away!

- Roux

[vpyre]

New pinned post! Finally!!

Haven’t made one of these in a while, but I’m a good deal more active nowadays so I think it’s a good idea to introduce my blog and stuff. I typically just reblog things, but I do write the occasional fanfic and draw the extremely rare fanart.

I made a little get-to-know-me strawpage thing :3

My Linktree with my etsy, twitter, instagram, tumblr, and ao3 :D

Posts by me are tagged #vpyre’s verbosity, my writing is tagged #my writing, and my art is tagged #my art (most of it is old and kinda shit, but eh whatever). I try to tag different fandoms, so feel free to block tags you aren’t interested in :)

I made a Discord server for people who love Copia! It also has channels for anyone who likes the other papas and the ghouls :3

I have a new sideblog if any mutuals/followers wanna join me over there! It’s @vpyre-hornyposting and it’s where I’m gonna be posting my NSFW thoughts about whatever characters I’m into and receiving asks from anyone who wants to share in the horny.

My AO3 page is here. For ease of access, I’ll also individually link all my fics (both the ao3 and tumblr versions) and headcanons in a masterlist here:

Headcanons:

Black Butler HCs

Grelle Sutcliff/switch!fem!Reader smut hcs (June 2024) || Tumblr

Fanfiction:

Ghost Fics

A Quick Taste (August 2024) - gn!Reader/Copia smut fic || Tumblr • AO3

Can You Feel Me Longing for You (forever) (July 2024) - gn!Reader/Copia smut fic || Tumblr • AO3

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait (Oct. 2022) - Dewdrop Ghoul/transmasc!submissive!Reader smut oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

Hannibal Fics

The Taste of Iron (May 2024) - Hannigram smut ficlet || Tumblr • AO3

The Truman Show Fics

all i want is to take care of you (July 2022)- gn!Reader/Truman Burbank smut oneshot || AO3

Five Nights at Freddy’s (and related franchises) Fics

Closer (Feb. 2022) - trans!gn!Reader/transman!Michael Afton smut oneshot || AO3

When In Doubt, Ask Him Out! (Nov. 2021) - transman!Michael Afton/Charlie Emily oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

What Makes a Monster (Nov. 2021) - Felix Kranken & William Afton horror (kinda) oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

If Holding You Will Heal You, I Never Wanna Let You Go (Nov. 2021) - extremely angsty hurt/comfort (cut me some slack here, I was a teenager lmao) nonbinary!Reader/Michael Afton oneshot || Tumblr • AO3

Dress-Up Makes Everything Better! (Nov. 2021) - transman!Michael & Elizabeth Afton cutesy sibling fluff oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

The One You Should Not Have Killed (Nov. 2021) - Cassidy & William Afton horror/angst oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

‘cause everything else is a substitute for your love (Nov. 2021) - gn!Reader/transman!Michael Afton smut fic (two chapters) || Tumblr • AO3

The Wrong Smile (Oct. 2021) - very dark and angsty fic/thinkpiece hybrid thingamajig about the missing children || Tumblr • AO3

Black Butler Fics

No Matter How Tremulous the Flame, the Ice Will Always Melt (May 2021) - Grelle Sutcliff & William T. Spears hurt/comfort oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

Stick Around (Apr. 2021) - Othello & Grelle Sutcliff fluffy-ish oneshot (request) || Tumblr • AO3

The Geek Division (Apr. 2021) - Othello & Grelle Sutcliff slightly angsty/fluffy lighthearted oneshot || Tumblr • AO3

From Above and Below, Face to Face and Behind (March 2021) - Reader/Grelle Sutcliff smut oneshot (my first finished fic ever!) || Tumblr • AO3

I think that about does it! I might add more to this if I think of something later, maybe some old WIPs if anyone is interested in that (I think it’s just some Reader/Astarion stuff I never finished).

Fic requests are currently closed, but you can absolutely still send them; I just probably won’t write unless I really really like it

[theplotdemandsit]

I not sure what was the show first idea when they show that version of Ben on the Subway in season 3 finale, they say it was the sparrow one traveling, but man that hair and the book? There's a lot of scenes with kid Ben and ghost Ben reading books, it's inevitable not to think about the deleted possibilities.

How do you think would be the interaction between og Ben and sparrow Ben if they met in season 4?

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again.

Man, I miss Umbrella Ben.

See, Ben was the only one who, ironically, seemed to have a head on his shoulders. Sure, Five is smart, but he is also emotionally constipated like the rest of the family. Ben was not only smart, observant, and witty, but he also showed that he cared deeply about others. His emotional quotient (EQ) is much higher than the rest.

So for Umbrella Ben to meet Sparrow Ben would be a laugh. I get the feeling they would bond over books since—you know—that's what books do.

What you read next is mostly just me projecting my nerdiness onto Ben. So basically it's not great but hopefully answers your question!

Somewhere, in some AU that may or may not exist….

Ben claps his mug on the table, and the amber liquid sloshes off the sides. “Who’re you?”

“Ha! Hear that, Klaus? He’s asking me who I am.” The look-a-like in front of him suddenly turns serious. “I’m asking the questions here, Bub.” The kid crosses his arms over the chest—a look which might have been menacing had the corners of his mouth not been twitching and his glare a little less star-eyed. 

“Come on, Wolverine!” Klaus says, slapping one hand on Ben and the other on…Not Ben. “Let’s all get along, now. You’re both beautiful.”

Not Ben laughs, and Ben finds himself blinking at the sight. Did he ever look like that when he laughed? It was like a completely different person.

It is a completely different person.

Ben growls and takes another sip from his mug. Klaus and Pseudo Ben are on the other side of the bar, pouring themselves drinks and clinking their glasses together like children having a tea party.

And he was not jealous.

What was the purpose of Klaus inviting him over? To brag about how their Ben was back? To show off the much nicer, better version of himself? Well Klaus could go—

“You idiot!” Their Ben suddenly shouted, smacking Klaus over the head. “You know you can’t take medication with alcohol! Give me that.”

“Back off! I always get all sniffly after getting wasted, so I’m taking my vitamins now rather than later.

From what Ben could see, Klaus had only had a sip of whatever cocktail he’d made for himself. Plus he was pretty sure there were lots of vitamins that didn’t have an interaction with alcohol. “Actually,” he starts, “if you—“

Umbrella Ben snatches the pills away despite Klaus’ lament about it only being Vitamin C and leans over near Ben to whisper in his ear. 

“But we don’t tell him that. Get me?” Then he winks. Like it’s some sort of inside joke.

Ben frowns. “Right.” Though he’s not exactly sure what he agreed to. Or what Lookalike Ben thinks he was even going to say. 

Up close, Imitation Ben notices the book Ben kept in his satchel. “Anna Karenina?” He asks. 

Ben’s frown deepens. “Yeah. What’s it to you?”

Fake Ben shrugs and pulls away. “Nothing. I was just thinking that Karenina is kind of sad.”

“Yeah, well, the characters are interesting and the writing is flawless. So to each their own.” Trying to forget the cringe of what he just said, he reaches for his mug again, ready for the other him to retreat.

Instead, a goofy grin appears on AU Ben’s face. “Have you ever read Crime and Punishment? Now those are some solid characters. Plus a happy ending.”

Now Ben’s interest is piqued. He narrows his eyes. “Happy ending, huh?”

“He’s working towards redemption. I’d say any ending with hope is a happy ending.”

“Who?” Klaus asks, pouring himself another drink.

“Raskolnikov.”

“Bless you,” Klaus says.

It was a happy ending, Ben thought. Despite the crimes Raskolnikov committed, there was someone who loved him and believed in him even when he didn’t believe in himself. For some reason, Ben always found himself drawn to the story, relating too much to Raskolnikov at times and trying not to hope too much for a Sonia he was sure would never come.

Looking into his own eyes across from himself, he sees that this Other Ben understands that. But, unlike him, he’s somehow smiling.

Ben twirls his mug around on the counter. After a moment, he turns to Ben 1.0 and asks with a smirk, “Ever read Faust?”

[chimivx]

ghosting ↠ txt

now playing ↠ your needs, my needs • noah kahan

He left you with letters. Envelopes that took you five years to finally read, acknowledge. They take you back through your past, forcing you to make moves not only for yourself, but for your family, for your children… His children.

part two of six ~ masterlist

word count ↠ 1396 warnings ↠ (same for all parts) 18+. mentions of drugs, alcohol, smoking. swearing. explicit sexual content. these people have kids, there’s family talk, pregnancy talk. absent dad, messy family ties. stepsib shit, stepcest. infidelity. if any of these things bother you, please keep scrolling. if i missed anything PLEASE let me know!! a/n ↠ if you are new to this story, don't start here! please go to the masterlist! major thank you to everyone who's read this story. <3 xo posted ↠ 6/9/24 ~ 12:50 p.m. est

~ january 2020 ~

A melody of Christmas music played from the tv, a soft joyful sound in the background to fill the noise between the babies babbles. The holiday was just over a week ago, the movies should be retired, but your boys couldn’t get enough. They bounced on their bottoms and giggled whenever the music would start all over again.

“Think I’m going to be singing Jingle Bells for the rest of my life,” Soobin said, his warm voice comforting you just as his arms around your shoulders as he settled on the couch behind you. 

Cross legged you sat on the floor, keeping a watchful eye over your twins, Chan biting on the colorful blocks sprawled everywhere while Sunoo crawled around on the carpet exploring his favorite space in the house. 

They were a year and almost three months old, having celebrated their birthdays back in October right here in their home. Your entire family showed up, Joy and Jin popping in an hour earlier than expected with piles of wrapped boxes in their arms for your boys to open later. Later finding out they were boxes of clothes and shoes, specially ordered from a designer Joy was currently hyper fixated on, along with a check in the card for an amount of money you and Soobin positively could not accept, and a promise to redo the boys bedrooms as they grew older.

The clothes were nice, as were the shoes. You’re sure Sana accepted these kinds of gifts when her baby’s were turning a year old, but your boys simply wouldn’t last. They’d get all but one use out of each outfit with how careful one needed to be with the fabrics. You were raising twin boys, twin boys that were just learning to stand and still needed assistance with eating. Blow outs were still a common occurrence, both you and Soobin were tossing out multiple onesies weekly.

Both Chan and Sunoo hated shoes. Hated them. Once they were slipped on, they were kicked off. Soobin began keeping track of when the boys did it, when they were frustrated by sensory things, even though they were only a year old. Both of them, to a certain degree, were already showing signs of sensory distress.

Important things to pay attention to, Soobin had told you one night after a day of fighting with the little ones to put any kinds of clothes on.

He reminded you that they were still babies on top of everything else that flooded your brain, leaving you in equal distress. Somehow his words relieved you for the time being.

About a week ago, Christmas Day, your mother and step father insisted on the stacks of presents you and Soobin’s disapproving eyes fell upon. Many of the gifts weren’t even for your twins, but for the two of you, and they were unseriously backhanded.

A brand new toaster the two of you couldn’t even begin to afford, to replace that old thing you’ve had since college, Soobin! A blender, an ice maker, an air fryer, a whole new set of silverware… All things you and your husband didn’t want. Things you didn’t need.

Things you accepted with grace, and gratitude. Though you joked a few times about selling them online to add to the boys bank accounts. As much as you appreciated the gifts, helping with the boys' futures was ideal, and something you’ve mentioned. Many times. Soobins mother was the only one to listen, and she could barely afford to do so herself.

Taehyun and Sana didn’t come around for Christmas, they spent it down at their home in Avida. Sana’s parents and apparently many members of her family spent it there with the family of four, or so as Joy informed you while the two of you each cradled a twin as your husbands cooked dinner. It didn’t surprise you to learn her family stayed there, their house could fit a plethora of couples within it, the thing was giant, nearly bigger than the one you were raised in. 

You hadn’t seen Taehyun since the twins' birthday party, only him and his son, Minho, who was five years old making an appearance for a couple of hours before Sana called him home. They mostly stuck to themselves, Minho exploring around the twins' toys for a bit, or snuggling on his grandfather's lap.

Few words were exchanged between you and your step-brother, who was surprisingly sober. 

Hopefully for the sake of his son, Soobin had mumbled, having exchanged no words with the man dressed in black. Those two had it out for one another, whether your intuition over Taehyun’s aversion to Soobin was true or not.

Taehyun watched the boys crawl around, watched them interact with Soobin’s family, and kept his eye on them all while hugging the walls, like he was collecting recon. From time to time he’d send messages on his phone, and you wondered if it was to his wife, or to one guest invited not in attendance.

A boy you hadn’t spoken to in almost two years.

Behind you, Soobin pulled you closer between his legs, either one settling by your sides. You slotted in perfectly between his knees and allowed your head to lull backward onto him. Looking up at him from where you sat on the floor, you gave him the smallest of smiles, one he returned. Leaning over you, he pressed an upside down kiss to your lips, staying there for a few seconds before he pulled away and pressed one to your forehead.

“I’m glad you’re here,” he whispered against your skin. A slight pain speared through your heart, one that made an appearance on your brows. Soobin clicked his tongue and kissed you in the same spot, willing the discomfort away. “None of that. Look at our boys.”

Our boys.

Lifting your head, Soobin wrapped his arms around your chest and rested his chin over your hair. You both let out a laugh at once as the twins suddenly became aware of one another occupying the same space. Sunoo had crawled in front of Chan, the two sitting on their bottoms smiling at each other. They babbled incoherently at the same time, making the other laugh. Then, Sunoo lifted a hand and attempted to grab onto Chan’s foot, making his brother squeal and kick his legs like crazy. The oldest of the two watched his twin make a scene, then copied him.

“They’re best friends,” Soobin said quietly to not distract the boys. “Two happy little best friends, how lucky are they?”

“So lucky,” you whispered, holding onto his wrists with a grip that had potential to leave a mark behind. The little ones wouldn’t be here smiling at one another if it weren’t for the man wrapped around you.

The pain within was too much to bear. The dizzying nausea, the crippling, stay in bed type of sadness that infected your limbs every single day. The heartbreak that came in waves, typically crashing whenever Soobin held one of the boys, or both, rocking them to sleep, or soothing their cries. An emptiness, a disconnect that kept you so far away from accepting his love no matter how hard you tried, making you wonder if the guilt was ever going to leave, or, if you’d be forced to live your life stuck this way, in a push and pull of loss, shame, and gut wrenching heartbreak.

10/7/2020

…You’re getting so big, you’re walking already, that means you guys are smart. That means you guys are taking after your mom because no way in hell will you be getting any smarts from me. Part of me feels guilty writing this all down on paper instead of saying it to you, when I could be saying it to you, but I know one day you’ll understand why. I have no clue what comes of these letters, these pieces of me to you, so I have no idea when you’ll ever read this, so I’ll spare you your dads complaints. It makes me so happy to see your mom smile. Last time I saw her she was smiling, she was happy. You make her happy. Soobin makes her happy. You’re living a beautiful life, and that makes me happy. You’re safe, taken care of. You deserve that. Don’t forget to love her…

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thank you so much for reading. <3