#and the city very much DID NOT NEED THIS after a long weekend of once in a hundred years storms
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LA resident right of passage achieved: felt my first EARTHQUAKE
#what a fucking WILD natural phenomenon woah#maybe i'm more like my muse than i thought because i got EXCITED rather than scared#i mean it was a *baby* one near us so the house only *sorta* shook but the dogs are UNHAPPY#and the city very much DID NOT NEED THIS after a long weekend of once in a hundred years storms#º ✧ 。 i’m still out but i’ll grab some stuff at the store ooc shit
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I am not closely following the election results tonight, but I am occasionally seeing flashes of them out of the corner of my eye. The most obvious sign that things aren’t going well right now is the complete lack of celebrating on my dash. I know what tumblr looks like when it’s happy. Maybe I’ll go to bed tonight and see something different in the morning. I hope to god that is the case. But I’m thinking about the way I’m thinking right now, and I want to get some stuff down before the future kicks in.
In 2016 I was in a period of my life I affectionately refer to as as my fuckup era. I wasn’t even fucking up really. More just chilling out and falling short of the vague expectations I’d had about what I was supposed to be doing after I graduated college. While my friends from college rented apartments in the city and got jobs that didn’t supply you with a uniform shirt, I lived at home and worked as a barista at a fancy movie theater. That’s a real job you can do for almost five years. I didn’t have a clue what the back half of my twenties should look like. The only long term plan I had in my life was moving out west with my best friend, and my plan for finding a job once I was out there was basically to cross my fingers and hope.
Those days weren’t bad on the whole, but it felt like I was not actually living a life so much as I was goofing off in the waiting room. Sometimes that felt embarrassing, sometimes it felt fun, and sometimes it felt like I was completely pointless to the world.
On 2016’s Election Day, I went to bed early. After watching the votes come in, I needed the night to be over. I woke in a world that felt different than it had been the night before—not just in the actuality of who would be president but down to its foundations. I realized for the first time how much hope I’d had in human nature because now I didn’t feel it anymore. It’s almost silly when I think about it—so many horrible things had already happened that year, people had done horrible things as long as there have been people, and I didn’t think I was naive to that—but something clicked into place that morning.
It felt the same way my world had changed a year earlier, in 2015 during my last semester of college. My college victory lap felt like a prolonged downward spiral. Very early in the morning on a Monday, after pulling an all-nighter and overwhelmed by self-loathing that I could not just motivate myself to work on a paper that had been my only thought all weekend, I self-harmed for the first time in a way that was impossible to pretend it was anything else. Earlier that weekend, I’d tried staving off the urges drawing or writing on my arm, something that did (and does) usually work. I’d written this quote in silver sharpie on my forearm: “Good is not a thing you are. It's a thing you do.”
I picked that quote from the Ms. Marvel comics and liked the words so much, I thought that I wouldn’t be willing to purposefully mess it up by hurting myself there. Didn’t work. They just made me feel more ashamed of myself as I did it.
That was the worst I had ever felt. Then, on the Friday of that week, a friend of mine was senselessly, brutally murdered.
It doesn’t feel now like there was ever a time before her death. My memoir class is now where I wrote about her. My favorite professor is now the one who held me as I cried. My final thesis, the culmination of my history degree, never got finished and certainly never got polished. I turned it what I had and got an A minus. Sometimes I think of rereading that paper to see if that’s the grade it actually deserved. We hadn’t been the closest friends, but my name was still on the email admin sent to professors, listing students who might be emotionally affected by this tragic event. Grace’s murder hangs over every memory I have with her and everything she ever touched. It feels like its own type of obliteration to leave her reduced to her death.
Grace wanted to be a lawyer because she believed in justice and also liked arguing. She could be rude when she wasn’t interested in what you were saying. When you caught her attention, you felt like the most fascinating person in the room. She was so proud of being Jewish. I watched her become proud of being gay. She was so universally friendly that it took me a year to realize that she actually liked specifically me. She had a somewhat silly laugh and an astonishingly luminous smile.
I thought less of the world and the people in it because of how she died. Trump’s election in 2016 felt like that.
After he won, I left stasis. From November through December, I thought harder about my future than I ever had before. Who did I want to be? What did I most value? What did I think was worth protecting? What work wouldn’t kill me to do? At one point, in presumably a fit of madness, I thought, “what if I got into politics.” Epiphany eventually hit me. By the time of Trump’s inauguration, I was already enrolled at community college, getting my pre-reqs for nursing school.
Now it’s election night again, eight years later. I live on the west coast with my best friend, in a house that we bought together. I work as a nurse in a hospital in a city where there are homeless encampments off every highway and someone begging for change on every corner. Meanwhile, there’s Palestine. Meanwhile there’s Sudan. Meanwhile refugees drown in the sea and border patrol shoots jugs of water. Even hurricanes have human cruelty now.
I don’t think people are inherently good or the universe inherently kind. But I am very good at tricking myself into thinking it for a little while, and when I do, I can remember the a specific feeling from Friday of my senior year, from that morning in November— how fucking hard the disappointment hit me because I had expected people to be better than this. It makes me want to be better than that.
I believe, and hope that I always will, that we can make a better world. I don’t know what it looks like, but I think I will see it in my lifetime. Those of us who can believe such things owe a bit of that naïveté to the world—not to excuse atrocities or think them impossible but to believe that we can stop them at all. You have to have a couple people sprinkled around who are genuinely shocked when people do bad things. It’s not that the pessimists are wrong, but you need the occasional counterbalance. I want to be a reasonable cynic’s pleasant surprise.
Every shift, I interact with people at their lowest and worst. I see the direct pipeline from pain to anger to violence, and how fragile that pipeline can be. So many situations can be changed by things as small as a warm blanket or a kind word. Violence can be quite easy to avert. Crises can be quite simply to resolve. Even when I know that whatever I do that shift will not change the circumstances of a person’s life, I think that what I do that shift still matters.
I’m lying in bed, writing this post instead of looking at the news. I wonder how tonight will change me. Been thinking about what I’ll do if Trump wins. Been thinking about how whatever I think I need to do under Trump will still need to be done if Harris clutches out a victory. I guess this is a pessimist’s optimism: to a degree the election doesn’t matter. Good is not a thing you are. It is a thing you do. Our better world will always take a lot of work.
But please god please, why can’t it be just a little easier to do it?
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Charlie Swan x Fem Reader - Target Practice
Hopefully you guys like it! It's my first time trying to write Twilight fanfic but I had lots of fun writing this so I would be down to make more in the future if there is an interest.
Charlie Swan X Fem Reader- Target Practice -
Summary: You work as a Private Investigator. You first met Charlie at a gun range and ever since you saw him for the first time, you can't stop thinking about him. He notices you right away, not being able to keep his eyes off of you, intrigued by you. One day, he finally musters up the courage to approach you and start a conversation.
Content: 18+, MDNI, sexual content, guns, oral sex, public sex, age gap,
WordCount: 4k
You had moved to Forks recently from a big city, looking for an escape from your stressful job as a private investigator. You had covered anything from cheating to much darker things that you were trying to forget about. You needed some time off, so you decided to switch things up and move to the small town of Forks, Washington. Not long after arriving, you discovered through a local newspaper that there was a gun range a few minutes out of town. The first time you shot a gun was for your weapon training course. It surprised you how easily you took to it and how you somewhat enjoyed the experience. The small rush of adrenaline and the focus required made your blood rush and made you feel alive. Luckily, you never required a gun for work, but you always kept one hidden in the glove box of your blacked out Mustang. The first time you went to the gun range, you had just wanted to check it out, but once there you felt stupid turning around. You entered the old looking concrete building, which almost looked like an old prison but smaller. You could already hear the loud gunshots, slightly muffled through the front door.
Once inside, you went up to the front desk, which doubled as a large gun locker. The old man leaning back in an old wooden chair polished a gun looking up at you. He put the rifle down and stood to greet you. You pay the admission fee and the rounds of ammo and you, as you enter the second section of the range where the targets are, you feel the old man's stare. He probably knows every single customer, but you are new here and also the only woman in sight. You feel pairs of eyes on you as you go to your assigned booth at the very back. That's when you see Charlie for the first time. He is in the booth right next to yours, his focus remaining on the target ahead. You find him handsome from first sight. He was just your type. A little older, rugged, strong looking, with a full head of dark hair and a nicely trimmed mustache. He seemed quiet, observant, but discreet. You caught him glancing your way as you settled in your own booth at the very back. As you prepped your gun, you felt his eyes on you again, lingering, but not constantly. During your first visit to the shooting range, he stayed silent but sneaked intrigued glances towards you when he thought you wouldn't to notice. You had good aim the first visit despite being a little rusty. His was near perfect, you noticed. He pulled the trigger like it was breathing to him, never straying too far from his intended target. He also looked detached a little while he shot round after round like he did this every Sunday. Did he? You thought to yourself. It was only on your way out that first night that you noticed a patch on his jacket telling you he was a cop and the chief of police of Forks.
The following two weekends, you made the trip to the gun range to shoot a few rounds, and you saw Charlie there each time. He seemed to allow himself to look at you more and more each visit, his gaze lingering longer than before. Then one day, he finally broke the silence at the end of a session.
“Where you from anyway? Ive never seen you around?” He asked as you were taking a break. You pushed back the large noise canceling headphones that you wore while shooting.
“I just moved here about a month ago. I’m from Seattle.” You explained, happy that he finally spoke to you.
“Ah, that explains it. If you don't mind me asking, how did you learn to shoot like that?” He asked, arching a brow slightly. The sight made you hold in a giggle.
“I'm a Private Investigator so the training came with the job but I ended up enjoying it so now I do it as a way to unwind, I guess.” You told him, looking up into his dark eyes. He nodded, as if finally able to solve the puzzle he’d been constructing in his head.
“Well, I have to say after me you might be the best shot in this town.” He chuckled softly, and the praise made your stomach do flips. You didn't think a random man’s opinion would mean so much to you, but you cared about what he thought of you.
“Well Chief, thank you. My name is Y/N.” You stuck out your hand for a handshake, not yet knowing his name.
“Please call me Charlie.” He shook your hand, giving you a warm smile. His touch lingering slightly on your smaller hand. His hand slightly calloused and rough felt warm in your grip. You both pulled away and went back to your own thing. He kept shooting a few rounds. You found yourself simply watching him for the rest of the session.
A few months later…
After settling in fully into the Forks' lifestyle, you noticed a few things. Charlie was everywhere, and everyone in town knew and respected him. He was also a very quiet, reserved man who was impossible to read at times. You always felt nervous talking to him for some reason despite his trustworthy reputation as the town's hero. You were sitting in the only bar in town. You rarely went out for drinks, but tonight you sat on a high stool dressed in a nice black jumpsuit. You took the time to do your hair and apply a little makeup, which was a rare sight. While you were lost in thought, a person suddenly occupied the empty seat next to you.
“Fancy seeing you here.” Charlie sat with an ease that made you think this was his usual spot. You flashed him a smile that he returned.
“Yeah, what are the odds?” You joked back, knowing it was the only bar around for miles.
“You come here often?” You add in teasing him.
“Probably more than I should.” He joked back and gave the bartender a little signal. A few minutes later, a tall draft beer sat in front of him. Your cocktail sat half empty as you nursed it, taking your time to make sure you could still drive home after. The two of you sat and talked for a while, the time slipping by as easy conversation flowed effortlessly.
“I have this cabin up in the mountains with an outdoor practice range. I usually go up there with my buddies during hunting season, but I was wondering if you'd maybe want to go there to shoot. I mean you don't have to but if it interests you, I could um.. take you.” He seemed to get flustered by the proposition. Was he asking you on a date? “Yeah, that sounds great. I'm free next weekend.” Your answer eased his antsy demeanor, and he settled back into the stool, smiling at you, pleased.
“Perfect then. Ill pick you up and we can go.” He confirmed and the thought of going on a weekend trip to his cabin excited you more than anything had in the past 2 months .
The weekend came, and you felt like a teenager as you paced by your window waiting for his truck to pull into the driveway. The outfit you had spent hours debating was a functional but cute ensemble consisting of a pair of jeans, a black tank top paired with a soft Forrest green flannel, and a pair of lace up hiking boots. You heard the gravel crunch and then saw his truck slow to a stop. To your surprise, Charlie exited the truck and approached your front door. A loud but still polite knock sounded a few minutes later, and you had to stop yourself from running to the door like a love-struck teenager. Opening the door, you admired him for a moment. He had shaved, leaving only his signature mustache perfectly trimmed. He wore dark-colored jeans paired with a gray t-shirt and a faded leather jacket. He looked so handsome that you had to stop yourself from ogling too long and making things awkward.
“Ready to go?” He asked, flashing you a smile that almost took your breath away.
“Yeah, but I don't have a gun. Sorry, I forgot to mention that earlier.” You usually borrowed one from the range.
"No worries, I got you covered." He replied, smirking. Walking back to his truck and you followed instinctively. He opened the hatch of his truck to reveal a black trunk of some sort. He pulled it towards him and unlatched the cover to reveal a whole arsenal of firearms, from pistols to rifles.
There were loads of ammo and other things as well and you were relieved he came prepared. You were willing to simply watch him shoot if it had come to it. You climbed in the truck after Charlie held the door open for you. He drove the both of you into the mountains, the forest getting thicker the further you drove. You filled the silence with pleasant conversation. You couldn't remember feeling this comfortable with anyone on this level before meeting Charlie. He made you feel seen, safe and fuzzy inside. Like a warm roaring fire was slowly building within you every time you thought of him or saw him in town. Once you arrived at the cabin, he helped you out of the truck and gave you a quick tour of the property. He showed you around the little clearing where he had set up many targets of varying distances, sizes and difficulty. He seemed proud of his hard work as he walked you around, showing you all the little details he had thought of and engineered himself. He then brought you inside the cute little log cabin that had a small kitchen, bathroom and a single bedroom. The inside was decorated with memorabilia that had been collected over the years. The cabin had charm and you couldn't help but walk around appreciating all the little momentos that made the cabin feel alive. This place was Charlie's space and you could tell he had fun times here in the past with his friends.
“Its so nice Charlie, wow.” You told him, admiring the little metal fireplace in the corner of the living room. He saw you looking and approached to start making a fire. “You like it?” He smiled, crouching down to add logs to the fireplace.
“Yeah, I love it.” You replied, still finding more things to look at. Everything in here had a story behind it and you couldn't wait to ask him more about his different adventures.
“We can take a little break and eat before we go out to shoot.” He lit the fire and then stood to cross the cabin over to the fridge.
“You brought food?” You asked confused, not remembering a cooler of any kind. He open the fridge door and the fridge was fully stocked.
“I came up here yesterday to make sure we had food and other supplies we might need.” He pulled out a few things, placing them on the counter and closing the door once more. The thought of him going through all this effort for you made your belly warm and a rush of butterflies to flutter around. There was a tension in the air but it wasn't the bad kind. You went to his side to help him prepare the food. You made some steak and potatoes along with some steamed green beans.
“My daughter showed me how to cook. Without her I would still be eating tv dinners every night.” He laughed to himself, draining the boiling water from the potatoes carefully.
“You have a daughter? I didn't know.” There were still a few things you wanted to know about him and you were curious to learn more.
“Yeah, Bella, she doesn't live with me anymore. She has a husband Edward and they live together with their daughter, Renesmee. I go visit them as much as I can nowadays.” He seemed wistful but the love that shined in his eyes made it clear the level of affection he held for his daughter and her family.
“Hopefully, I can meet her one day.” You smiled at him warmly.
“Yeah, that would be nice.” He agreed, looking into your eyes, his dark pupils flaring slightly. He looked away, going back to preparing the food. Once you were both done, you sat and ate in a peaceful silence. Then it was time for some fun.
You fired round after round, enjoying the rare sunshine that made the day even more special. You had friendly competitions with Charlie, who liked to tease that you were cheating by distracting him. In the end you won fair and square and you celebrated by opening a beer and sitting tother in the clearing on a large fallen log. He smiled at you as you took a sip of your beer. You were a little sweaty, your hair clung to the back of your neck from the beaming heat of the sun. Charlie seemed lost in thought, so you broke the silence first.
“What are you thinking about?” You asked softly.
“I can't remember the last time I was this happy.” He said simply, and the words flared something inside you like the fire that was building before it came to a roar suddenly. It gave you the confidence you needed to say the words that had been on your mind for the past month.
“I like you Charlie.” The words came out in a single breath, softly spoken, making you feel vulnerable.
“You do?” He asked, looking at you with a fierce look of longing. His question seemed like it served for his reassurance. Like he couldn't believe that someone like you could ever like someone like him.
“Yeah, a lot.” You replied nodding, a small smile forming on your lips. You felt nervous, giddy energy bubbling inside.
“Fuck sweetheart, you sure? I am a lot older than you are.” He seemed to be having an internal battle. You did have a considerable age gap between you, but that did not stop the attraction that you felt. He was kind, charming, warm and considerate, along with incredibly hot, which helped.
“I know, but that doesn't change anything for me. If it doesn't bother you then it doesn't bother me.” You said softly, scared he would reject you after bearing yourself to him. He looked torn and intense, and it made you nervous.
“Listen, I don't want you to think I have ill intentions. I like you too, trust me. Shit, I don't remember the last time I felt like this. It makes me feel young again.” He swore and chuckled, shaking his head.
You felt hopeful, so you decided to take a leap of faith. You knew he would never make the first move, so you did. You leaned in slowly, giving him time to pull back if he wanted to. He instead pulled in closer as well and your lips met his. The kiss started slowly as you sighed into the soft contact of your lips. His mustache brushed against your upper lip and you gently griped the back of his neck with your hand. The kiss grew more intense as he brushed his tongue against your bottom lip mid kiss. You opened up for him and let your tongue explore as well. You pulled back breathless and the both of you held each other's eyes. Heat was building low in your stomach, sending a pool of liquid to your core.
“Do you want to go inside?” He asked gruffly, his voice thick with desire.
“Yeah.” You led the way, standing from the log and feeling charlie follow behind you. Once inside, you couldn't hold back any longer and you almost pounced on him. Turning back to him once he closed the door and pressing him up against it, resuming the kiss you shared outside. It took him a split second to return the kiss, gripping your hips firmly with strong hands. He surprised you by turning the both of you suddenly so your back was pressed against the door. You released a small breath and looped your hands around his neck. He grabbed behind your thighs and lifted you effortlessly so your legs wrapped around his torso.
The kiss continued fierce and passionate. Your hands gripped the back of his hair slightly, tugging the short strands between your fingers, earning a rough rumble from Charlie. The sound set another wave of lust to your core. You broke the kiss panting and looked into his blazing dark eyes that devoured you.
“Charlie, I need you.” You spoke the words sounding needy even to your own ears.
“Fuck sweetheart, are you sure?” He asked for your consent, his eyes hopeful but careful, making sure you felt comfortable.
“Yes, Ive never been more sure.” You answered with a small smile, knowing this was important to him.
“I don't have any, um, protection, darling.” His low, almost embarrassed voice made your heart swell. You stroked your thumb on his cheek. “I'm on birth control. It's okay.” You answered, soothing his worries.
You saw the restraint in him give in that moment as he carried you to the bedroom. You felt the excitement return, and you started peppering kisses to his jaw, down his neck, over the strong column of his stubbled throat. He groaned deep in his throat, a sound of pure male pleasure and it encouraged you. He set you down gently on the queen size bed hovering over you and leaning down to return the favour. He trailed kisses down your neck to your exposed collar bones, spreading kisses across them like he was appreciating every inch of your skin. You shivered with pleasure beneath his strong frame. He gently helped you out of the flannel you wore and then the tank top and jeans, leaving you in your underwear. Then you went to work on his clothing, shedding him of his layers until he was in his boxers and socks.
The two of you continued the frenzied kissing like horny teenagers because that's what you both felt like. He was hard and you could tell it was big. It excited you and your hand trailed down to pull out his large cock from the confines of his underwear. He let out a huff of breath and he groaned when you started stroking him slowly, teasing him a little. He sat back and pulled you up with him so you were straddling his lap. He expertly unclasped your bra, and the look of admiration and pure lust thrilled you. He spent time appreciating your breasts, kissing them, licking your hard budding nipples, and then gently nipping the tips with his teeth, sending you twitching of pleasure in his arms. He made another guttural sound of pleasure and then you were beneath him again. He was trailing kisses down your stomach, going lower and lower until he reached your soaking wet clothed mound. He peeled your wet underwear from your legs and flicked them on the floor. He looked up at you with an intense lustful gaze, his dark eyes asking before his lips spoke the words.
“Can I?” The question was almost whispered against your core, sending shivers up your spine. You nodded quickly, flustered. Your cheeks felt warm and your breathing was still a little erratic from the intensity of the moment. He dipped down to your slick folds and got to work, starting with slow teasing licks that made you crazy. Your hands instinctively flew out to grip his dark brown hair. You felt his facial hair brush against your inner thighs and it turned you on. He devoured your pussy like a starving man, with languid strokes of his tongue that increased in speed slowly, followed by slightly sucking on your sensitive clit. You pulled harder on his hair, releasing little moans and soft cries at the pleasure. He increased in speed and intensity until you felt the slow climb of your orgasm forming. It came like a crashing wave, strong and sure. The white hot pleasure peaking and sending you free falling of the ledge. Your legs shook as you came on his tongue, moaning loudly and releasing his hair to grip the sheets tightly with bunched fists. He pulled back after you were done riding the comedown of your dizzying orgasm.
“You taste so good, Princess.” He praised low and throaty from his own desire.
“Charlie, I want your dick.” The request left you without even thinking, you were still hypnotized from the rush of coming hard for him. He seemed pleased at the words and he pulled down his boxer briefs, his fully erect dick touching his happy trail. He was a good 7 inches for sure and the sight of him in his full glory made your mouth water. He positioned himself until he was lined up to your slick entrance and then, with a smooth slow thrust, he pushed in. The feeling of him filling you slowly was exquisite. He groaned and squeezed his eyes shut in pleasure.
“Fuck you're so tight.” He cursed under his breath as he started to test out a few thrusts. You moaned as he slowly picked up the pace. He braced himself on his elbows, caging you into him and sending his smell to flood your senses. He smelled faintly of pine and sweat and it turned you on more than any expensive cologne could. He fucks you deep, powerful thrusts and your moans increase in volume. He looks down into your eyes with lust, sweat beading on his forehead from the exertion. He lets out little groans and muffled curses as he fucks you.
“You're so pretty when I fuck you, sweetheart.” He coos, pounding into you and sending you close to a second orgasm already.
“Fuck yes Charlie.” You moan out his name, clutching the surrounding sheets in pleasure.
Your back arches and you feel one of his strong, calloused hands on the small of your back, holding you up and pressing your front to his chest as he thrusts into you fast and strong.
Your sensitive nipples rub against his hairy chest and it sends sparks of electricity through your body as you feel the peak of your second orgasm approaching. It rocks through your body and you pull him in for a needy kiss. You come while kissing him, breaking apart to moan out his name as you convulse in his powerful grip. Your toes curl, your back arching even more and then you come even harder than the last time. Your vision blurs a little as you come down from the high, still pressed close to a panting Charlie, who came at the same time. He pulls out slowly and then stands to grab tissues from the wooden side table next to the bed. He wipes you first, then himself. Then he approaches where you sit at the edge of the bed, watching him with a loving smile. He settles into the bed, pulling you close to him, and you cuddle with him in the drowsy post orgasm haze. His hairy chest serves as your pillow as you gently stroke his shoulder and then trail your fingers on his chest. You sigh happily.
“You know that was the best sex I've ever had.” He smiles down at you, flashing you with one of those breathtaking smiles.
“Me too.” You agree, smiling wider and then pulling him in for another kiss.
#fanfiction#charlie swan#charlie swan x reader#twilight#twilight fanfiction#twilight smut#Charlie Swan x fem reader#my fic#fanfics
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Keep A Leftover Light Burning
Pairing: joel miller x Ceramicist! reader
MINORS DNI WITH MY WORKS PLEASE !!
A/N: howdy howdy and welcome all now this is a very special fic for @burntheedges for the @pedrostories secret santa event!! I hope you like it and find it as fun as i did. I think this isnt a trope that we see very often, but after a healthy dose of tiktoks (and watching the scene from ghost again) this came into being. As always thank you to my beloveeeeeeed @carlynkurin for beta reading, and peace and love on the planet earth from me, xoxo Remember that TLOU is created by a zionist so please look at the resources at the end of this fic and in my bio on ways to donate and educate yourself!! tags: Ceramicist reader, smut, porn with plot, oral (f! receiving), publicish sex, strangers to lovers, lots of wet clay, joels arms require their own tag Word count: 3.4k Summary: Sarah forces joel to go take a day to himself, pushing him in the direction of your pottery studio. Despite calling yourself professional and priding yourself on your morals, you can’t help but… fantasize about the man in front of you.
Joel needs to take time for himself. He’s always on, always ready to go at the flip of a switch, never taking time to sit and breathe. Everyone knows how hard he works, and despite what he says, Sarah knows that he needs to do something calming. Something that doesn’t involve carving wood or going to the shooting range with Tommy on the off chance that both of them are free for long enough. So being the perfect daughter that she is, she enrolls him in a ceramics workshop that she had gone to once. It was a small studio, tucked away next to the Palace Theatre in downtown Georgetown, soft and quaint in the suburbs, away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Sarah managed to get a hold of you over the phone and explain the situation, a smile threatening to creep onto your cheeks at the sheer amount of care she had for her father. You tell her not to worry about the price and that you would stay open for an extra hour next weekend just to get him in, a squeal on the other side is all the confirmation you need as you pencil it into your schedule.
Sunday rolls around and Joel… Well, he was being Joel. Stubborn and groaning as Sarah essentially pushes him out the door to make the drive up IH-35, complaining about “I build things for a living,” and “it’ll be a waste of time.” but Sarah is hearing none of it and one look from her has Joel slipping on his boots. In any other circumstance, he would have praised her for holding her ground, but right now he just sighs and gets into his truck realizing just how much of his stubbornness had rubbed off on her.
He ends up at the studio just before 5, the sun starting to dip under the horizon, casting beautiful pinks and oranges around the sky. He’s still bitching and moaning as he makes his way to the building, taking a deep breath as he steps inside. You barely even hear the jingle of the little bell above your door, too busy fighting with your sink: now clogged with clay from your last class with 3 kids under ten who didn't understand that when you told them not to dump clay inside the sink. You had meant it. “Fucking thing!” you groan, poking a paintbrush into the drain, hoping to get enough clay out of it so that it would run again.
Joel stares at you, half confused and half amused with the scene in front of him; your hair a mess, your apron covered in clay and paint, hacking into your sink in ways that he knows won't do you any good. He clears his throat after watching you struggle for about 30 seconds, stifling a smirk when you jump and look back at him. “Need some help? I’m s’possed to have a class now- my daughter-” he shakes his head at the idea of sharing the whole story again “Did I get the wrong time?”
You look absolutely mortified, dropping the paintbrush in the basin and giving the man in front of you a weak smile “No! No, I just got a little... occupied… you’re on time” You wipe your hands on the front of your apron, not even bothering to attempt to fix your hair, before walking over to greet him. Properly this time. “You must be Joel. Your daughter was very persuasive on the phone.”
Joel’s smirk shifts into a full-blown smile at the mention of Sarah, the pride he has for the girl shining through. “Yeah, she’s a good one.” he praises. Despite his reluctance to listen to her advice, he knows just how good her heart is, and how much she cares about him. I “Ain't sure what she told ya, and to be honest she hasn't told me what I'm s’possed to be doing here either”
You can't help but smile at his words, the pure adoration for his daughter combined with the slight nervousness in his voice was endearing in ways you weren’t sure how to describe. “No worries, I promise it isn’t anything scary.” You glance around the studio. Outside, the sky had begun to darken, the soft lighting of the different lamps inside the building casting the both of you in a warm glow. The glaze on the ceramics you had on display was a wide assortment of colors: intricately painted motifs, bright splashes of colors, silly cartoons, almost anything you could think of. You pick up a faded apron and hand it to him, watching him stretch as he puts it on. A brief flicker of guilt passes through you as you ogle him, but then you see the way his biceps strain against the fabric of his shirt and the guilt gives way to something primitive.
He turns back around and you look away with a cough, a slight warmth creeping up your cheeks when he raises his brows at you. “Right um-” you stumble over your words, more unrefined than you would have liked to be “Sorry, sorry. We’ll start with choosing what you’ll want to make. I always recommend something easy, like a bowl or a spoon rest..” you pick up a pencil cup that had been painted to look like a pencil and a spoon rest that was a simple blue color, to show him “I already have the clay prepped so we can get started straight on th-”
Joel cuts you off as he glances around the studio, pointing at a lidded cookie jar “That one.” His words leave no room for argument but certainly bring questions up to the surface. “I'm gonna do that one.” You had been making ceramics for years, starting with air-dry clay in school, continuing to use the wheel throughout university, and eventually quitting your day job to start the studio. You knew the skill level it took to make a jar, the precision and technique to keep it balanced, and it just wasn’t a beginner project.
“I'm sorry, the cookie jar?” You try not to let your voice betray your disbelief. It wasn't that you lacked faith in the man in front of you, you made sure to be confident in all of your clients, it was simply an issue of skill. “I don't know if that’s the one for you to start out with, it’s a little advanced-”
But Joel was having none of it. If he was going to be forced to sit here and make something to “calm him down” then damn it it was going to be something that takes skill and effort. Something that he could bring home to Sarah and brag about slightly. Was it a little strange that he wanted to one-up his daughter and prove that he didn't need to be here? Maybe a little bit, but he didn't dwell on it. “Yes ma'am.” His voice is set in the decision. “I'm sure it can't be that bad, let me at it.”
Never one to truly tell people no, you simply nod and get the prepared clay out. It was soft and slippery, staining your hands a taupe color as you brought it to the wheel, plopping it down on the wheel, and pressing down on the sides to make sure it stuck. “Alright, so with the jar..��� you gesture for him to take a seat in front of the wheel, moving to stand behind him “It’ll be a little bit more involved than something simple, but you're in good hands I promise.” Your words are soft, and frankly, you were excited. You didn't throw fun projects with clients as much as you’d like to anymore, focusing more on teaching the basics, so this was honestly a welcomed surprise. “We’ll just start with getting the basic shape of it, you’ll take your hands like this, and we’ll work it up.”
You sit on your stool behind him, usually, you’d be able to reach around and help with hand placement but good god was he broad. You adjust and readjust your position a few times, finding it oddly difficult to find the right mix between comfort and functionality, eventually ending up with your legs spread a little bit past their comfort level, so that you could lean over his shoulder and help him with the shaping. You squeeze some water onto his hands, moving them to cup the base of the clay and pop the wheel to life. His hands were big under your smaller ones, the roughness contrasting both the soft clay and your skin. You can't help but feel a twinge of something stirring inside you as you help him bring the clay up and down, your hands guiding his. Joel’s brows were knit together in concentration, both endearing and attractive as you watched him focus on the clay. The movements of his hands under yours were careful, almost hesitant, his eyes peeking back at you every so often for assurance.
Once the clay was at an appropriate size you moved your hands off of his, the wheel slowing to a stop. You swear that you see his hands twitch to stay under yours, but your mind might be playing tricks on you. “Now call me unartistic but this ain't really lookin’ like a cookie jar yet.” Joel raises his brows, a slight hint of teasing hidden in his southern drawl, and you can’t help but snort at the comment.
“I will not call you unartistic, it isn't supposed to look like a jar yet.” You hum and wipe your hands on your apron “We’ll do the lid to it later, but you have to actually make it into a bowl first.” your thumbs gently press down onto the center of the clay to form a soft dent. The wheel starts back up again slowly and you start to open the center up a little bit. “Right so now you just gotta take your thumbs like I did and- perfect!” Joel manages to press his fingers slowly against the clay, working it open, and god you wished that was you more than anything at that moment. You press on the sponge, the water dripping down his hand and onto the clay, almost sensually. Your eyes are locked on the way his thumb dips into the clay, the way the clay comes up onto his skin. Your mouth is dry, and you cough as you stand up, needing to take a deep breath and try to compose yourself.
“Everythin’ alright?” Joel's voice rings out from behind you as you move to take a drink of water, and you swear if his voice was just a tinge deeper, you would have choked right then and there. In the rush of getting up, your brain had ceased to realize that moving off the pedal would stop the wheel from turning.
You feel like an idiot. A stupid, hormonal, completely unprofessional idiot. You take a moment to scold yourself mentally before turning around to face him again. “Yeah, yes. Sorry I just realized how thirsty I was, I just needed water.” You move back to your stool behind him, halfway composed, and move to start the next step. If you'd been in front of him for one more second, you would have seen the knowing smile on his face. There was no denying the attraction between the two of you. Pressed up against each other, hands touching, dim light surrounding you both, it was inevitable. You move your hand to show him the right finger position “so you’ll want to take your middle and ring finger-” You press the two of yours inside of the bowl to give him an example and you swear he laughs a little bit.
“Oh, believe me, darlin” his voice rings out, big fingers expertly finding their way into the exact position. “I know all about this one.” You watch his fingers glide up and down the inside of the bowl, your hand on top of his, steadying his wrist. You bite at your lip, fingers shaking slightly on top of his. Your chest was pressed against his back and you could feel your nipples hardening. You were annoyingly turned on. This wasn’t normal for you, this wasn't something you do, get the hots for a client, but here you were. And with the way Joel's fingers were methodically moving over yours, you were begging that he felt the same way. “Wouldn’t mind showin’ ya all I know about it.” The want in his voice makes you clench subconsciously, your breath faltering for a second.
You hold your breath for a moment as if trying to make sure you hadn’t imagined his words in a haze of horniness, only to be broken out of that haze when he shifts and pushes his stool back, and turns around to face you. Both of your hands were covered in wet clay and your aprons were messy, neither of which stopped you from pressing your lips against his. You sigh against his mouth as your hand's fist in the fabric of his shirt, staining the fabric with readily drying clay. “I don't usually do this,” you murmur when you pull away for air, your lips swollen and red.
Joel just grins at your words “S’alright, honey,” his lips find their way to your jaw and move down to your neck, his nose nudging at the fabric of your shirt. “Don't gotta explain anything to me.” His voice is like molasses, smooth and syrupy, keeping you stuck on his every word. You let him move you around, the small wooden stools were less than ideal for either of you. In the mess of standing up and finding a table to bend over your shirt comes off and he groans at the sight of you, his hands grabbing at your waist, staining your skin with water. “Good god… sight for sore eyes…” You can't help but flush slightly at his comment, feeling more exposed while you stare at his fully clothed figure.
Joel picks up on it, his hands moving from your waist to his shirt and apron, a frustrated noise leaving his mouth when the knotted strings keep him from taking it off. “Let me,” you whisper, reaching around to undo the strings, the fabric of the apron sagging and then getting tossed to some other corner of the room. You stare at him. You couldn't not stare at him. At the hair covering his chest leading down to his belt, the soft yet strong features of his body, at his hand undoing his belt. Your own shorts had been removed, your hands moving to reach into his jeans until he stopped you, a pout and protest forming on your lips.
Joel just shakes his head at you, picking you up and setting you on a relatively clean table, his body wedged between your legs. “My momma raised me to be a gentleman,” he hums against your skin, kissing the tops of your breasts, nudging your nipples with his nose before giving each of them their own kisses “I didn't take ya to dinner, at least let me get my fill yeah?” Your back fully arched into his mouth as his lips wrapped around one of your nipples, hands gripping the edge of the table so hard your knuckles were white. The feeling of his tongue flicking against the hardened bud had you moaning out in ways you had never imagined you would, and you swear you could feel him smirk even as he licked a stripe down the soft skin of your tummy.
His knees crack as he settles between your legs and the sight of him is so sinful you can't help but moan softly. He raises his brows at you, a warm chuckle leaving his mouth at the sound, his lips pressing against the inside of one of your thighs “Look that good?” His voice is laced with a gentle mocking as he presses another kiss, a hair's breadth away from your aching cunt “think I got the better view though.” You don't even have the time, nor the brainpower, to reply before his lips press against you, a groan vibrating against your skin as he tastes you. “Sweetest fuckin’ pussy I’ve ever had… could get damn addicted.”
Your lips are parted as his tongue swirls around your clit, your whines and moans spurring him on even further. “F-fuck joel-” you manage at some point, his broad shoulders keeping your thighs spread apart, despite how much they’d like to clamp around him. He was good at this and he knows that, moaning at the sound of his name on your lips, the words giving him a newfound energy. You feel his warm palms against your thighs keeping you spread open for him, and you almost whine when his tongue leaves your clit, only to cry out in ecstasy when his tongue prods at your pulsing hole. His nose is pressed up against your clit, giving you just the right amount of friction as he gathers your slick on his tongue, cycling between fucking it into you and laying it flat over your cunt. “Joel- joel oh fuck-” Your moans are frantic as he continues to send you closer and closer to that edge, his motions only getting faster as your hand fists in his hair. “Oh my god- fuck fuck fuuuuck-” your legs shake around his head, his hands keeping them apart as he works you through your orgasm, not stopping until you were spent and hazy, laying back on the table with shuddering breaths.
Your eyes were pressed shut, chest rising and falling rapidly in the aftermath of your orgasm, only to peek open when you hear the clink of his belt. His mouth was covered in the sheen of your orgasm, a hungry look in his eyes as he spits into his hand and pulls his cock out. “Tasted like a damn dream,” he groans while he strokes himself. “Gonna remember this forever…” Your eyes are locked on the motions of his wrist, the steady pace, the pearly precum that was leaking from his tip. “Fuckin’ perfect… makin’ me feel like a damn teenager again.” You wait with bated breath as he continues to stroke himself, wiggling your hips in order to entice him.
“Joel,” your voice is soft, but so heavily full of need it was almost painful “Please… I want you.” If you were being honest, you thought that it would take more convincing, that you would have to ask more, but Joel was desperate, maybe more so than you were and so when he sinks his cock into your dripping cunt it was ecstasy for both of you. Your eyes fall shut again at the feel of him, the stretch so much but so good. “Oh my god…” you whine, pushing yourself onto him further, your breathing stuttering when one of his hands palms at your breast, the other one gripping your hip with so much strength you think it would leave a mark.
“That’s it…” he groans, slipping into you all the way. “Fuckin’ perfect pussy, like she was made for me.” His words are punctuated with shallow thrusts that fill you up again and again. Your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him in closer to you. The feeling of his hips pressing against yours is something you would never be able to get out of your memory.
You both lay there, bodies pressed against each other, his hips rocking into you slow and steadily, the dim lighting of the studio casting an ethereal glow over the scene. His hips move at a steady pace, keeping you full of him as the coarse hairs around him press against your clit with the right amount of friction. It doesn't take much time until he's panting on top of you, your lips pressed against each other's in a heated kiss as you feel him spill inside you.
“That was…” you were breathless, his chest still against yours, the rhythm of your hearts syncing up.
“Yeah…” He grins, pressing a kiss against your forehead gently. “I know I told ya I was a gentleman but, I really would like to see you again… of course no pressure if you don't want to or anything-”
You cut him off with a small laugh before he can keep going, nudging your head against his. “I want to, Joel.” You smile gently at him “Plus, you didn't finish the jar.” You grin, looking in the direction of the unfinished work of art he had started. “And then I have to fire it, then glaze it, then fire it again, then… well you get the point, I think I’ll be seeing you quite a few more times, Joel.”
A/N: From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free
READ: This account stands with Palestine unequivocally, and so— I require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. Silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.
DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist.
PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.
Thank you for reading, and free Palestine
#papaya writes <3#joel miller#joel tlou#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel x reader#joel the last of us#joel miller au#joel miller fic#the last of us fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#pedrostoriesgift24#pedrostories#pedro characters#pedro pascal
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Can you please write a platonic Yandere Adrien with (best) friend reader. Reader also has a miraculous, Adrien finds out. Kinda like a scenario
Please don't read this if you are uncomfortable with the yandere!
Pairing: Yandere! Adrien x Reader
tw: platonic obsession, stealing other people's things
Adrian sighs heavily. Lately, too many problems have been piling up on him. He didn't get a moment's peace at school. His father was constantly demanding something. And Hawk Moth seemed to never sleep. He added work for the heroes at the most inconvenient times. During a recent attack on the city, another person joined the famous hero duo. A little later, Adrian (or Chat Noir, to be precise) learned that Ladybug had nothing to do with it. This made him worry. Who is this person? Can they be trusted? And where did another Miraculous come from that doesn't belong to the guardian of the box? Too many questions filled the blond's head.
———
You greet Adrien with a joyful hug. The boy finally relaxes and forgets all his worries. In your presence, he feels calm. You excitedly start telling him about a new game and make him promise to play it with you this weekend. Adrien looks around the classroom. Every classmate is busy with their own thing. Once (when he had just started going to school) they used to tease you with jokes about being long-lost sibling. You two had just become friends too quickly and easily. Adrien sometimes joked himself that you were actually an Agreste. A bright glint distracts Adrien from his memories, and he notices a new pendant on your chest.
"What’s that?" Adrien asks.
You don't immediately understand what he's talking about. But when you catch his gaze, you start to stammer.
"Oh… Umm… just a piece of jewelry," you answer awkwardly.
"I’ve never seen you wear it before."
"I found it recently in a shop. Just some junk. Doesn't matter," you laugh nervously and change the subject.
Adrien raises an eyebrow in surprise. You've never behaved like this before. So… strange. It's like you're hiding something.
———
The villain throws Chat Noir into some trash cans and moves further into the city center, leading Ladybug away. Cat Noir groans in pain and tries to stand up, not very gracefully. A new hero lands softly next to him and extends a hand.
"I thought cats always land on their feet."
"Ha. Very funny," Chat Noir grumbles, but accepts the help. Chat Noir's gaze stops at the new hero's Miraculous. It's a pendant. The jewelry reminds him of something, but he can't remember what exactly.
"Let's deal with this quickly. I still need to make it to the book fair," the hero heads towards the noise, not waiting for his partner.
Chat Noir freezes. There’s only one fair in the city today. And Adrien was already planning to go there with you. A strange feeling washes over him. Now that he knows the new hero will be there too, he’s not so sure if he should go. Although there will be hundreds of people. The chance of revealing someone's identity is practically zero. Even if he accidentally starts scanning the crowd.
———
Ladybug was delayed. The heroes found themselves in a disadvantageous position. They barely escaped. Chat Noir was in a panic. He admitted that he hadn’t come up with the best plan. But the idea was reliable if they wanted to throw the villain’s minions off their trail. The minions ability will not allow them to find specific heroes if the heroes exchange Miraculouses and become new heroes. They needed to buy time until Ladybug showed up. That was what Adrien thought as he handed his ring to his partner behind the door.
He shuddered at the thought that if they wanted to betray him and reveal their connection to Hawk Moth, now would be the perfect moment. But they obediently handed him their pendant. Adrien almost thanked them but restrained himself. It was best not to talk too much without the magic of the Miraculouses. After all, Adrien was a famous model and it wasn’t hard to recognize his voice.
He finally looked at the other’s Miraculous and felt a shock. In his fingers lay a very familiar object. He couldn’t help but recognize your pendant. He had looked at it too often since he first noticed it. You were the new hero. Adrien panicked, wondering if you would recognize his ring. You rarely paid close attention to his hands. The hero (it can’t be… it’s you!) knocked on the door and asked him to hurry. Adrien decided to put his inner turmoil aside. The city needed saving right now.
———
The next day, Adrien watches you more closely than ever. You act as usual, which leads him to think that you haven't figured out Chat Noir's identity. A whirlwind of emotions overwhelms him. He's angry that you haven't told him anything. He understands you because he kept his secret the same way. And he's scared. What if one day you can't handle a villain? What if Hawk Moth finds out too? What if all of Paris learns your identity? Adrien starts to have a small panic attack. Nino jumps up and tries to help. Adrien is gasping for breath and can't explain anything.
-------
Adrien sneaks into the empty locker room while you and the class are swimming in the pool. It's one of the rare moments when you take off your pendant. It turns out that not all Miraculouses are as convenient as his ring or Ladybug's earrings. He never thought about how lucky he was before. He quickly finds your locker and breaks into it. The lock is so flimsy that Adrien feels a bit ashamed of how easily he was able to open it. He grabs the pendant and goes to hide it in his bag.
Adrien mentally prepares himself to comfort you. If he lost his Miraculous, he would be horrified. He thinks about what words he could say to console you. Adrien wonders if you would tell him your secret if you had nothing left to lose. He wants this. This will prove your trust in him.
Adrien thinks about what to do with your Miraculous now. He would like to use it sometimes along with his ring. But that would completely ruin your opinion of Chat Noir. Maybe he should bury the Miraculous in the forest or throw it into the sea so that no one could find it.
Now, you don't have to worry about the villains. And Adrien doesn't have to worry about your safety. Protecting Paris is no longer your job. Ladybug and Chat Noir will handle it together.
#yandere miraculous ladybug x reader#yandere miraculous ladybug#yandere x reader#adrien agreste x reader#yandere adrien agreste x reader#yandere chat noir#chat noir x reader#miraculous ladybug x reader
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cardigan (epilogue) (1/2)
i knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired, and you'd be standin' in my front porch light.
pairing: modern!aemond × best friend reader!
summary: being in love with your best friend since high school becomes a strong and unavoidable feeling. until it starts to become more difficult when you get to college and the two of you, especially him, meet new people.
word count: 9.9K
previous part • next part
obviously i didn't expect this to be too long hahaha, even i was surprised, i didn't realize it was too much. so i decided to make the epilogue in two parts. thank u all so much por reading❤
Life in Highgarden could not have exceeded your expectations more.
At first you felt like you were supposed to when you came to live in a new city: terrified, anxious and nervous. You didn't want to feel lonely, but it was inevitable considering you know nothing and no one.
And when you arrive at your new dorm, you immediately loved it. Your room is bigger than the one at King's Landing and you have a beautiful view with lots of trees around and green grass.
Highgarden is well known for the fantastic flora and fauna. Everything is green, there are big trees and beautiful plants, there are even lakes and the weather ¡is perfect.
Yet you didn't have much time to get to know the city, because a week after you arrived, your classes started. And a week after you started your classes, you started your internship.
You met Arthur Winslow, the psychologist responsible of your internship, owner of a mental clinic for children, teenagers and adults.
He explained to you from the beginning that, once you were prepared, you would be present in cases of children and teenagers as well as adults to start your experience.
In addition, you would also support him in administrative things, such as his schedule, phone calls and so on. The pay is at a fair price, so it's perfect.
And as a result of Aileen and Sara not making it into the exchange program, you made new friends in your classes.
Although even if your friends had gotten in, Aileen would have chosen to go to Dorne and Sara to Winterfell, so you started talking to the people in your class.
They all came from different parts of the country, only a very few came from King's Landing and you didn't really talk to them much.
And after the first month passed, you just couldn't get any better.
You adjusted perfectly to your internship, to your classes which are wonderful and you also made good friends very quickly with whom you finally had that security to go around Highgarden almost in its entirety.
You went to many places, whether it was squares, parks, museums, lakes and even aquariums. Everything was so beautiful.
You took pictures, videos, made compilations with all your visits to upload to your Instagram, and even went out for fun on weekends to parties and bars with your friends.
You kept in touch with your friends at King's Landing and also let your parents know what you were doing by sending them pictures, videos and also talking to them on the phone.
Even Helaena messaged you by replying to one of your Instagram stories asking how you were doing and how you were doing at Highgarden.
Also her older brother messaged you, Aegon. He asked you how you were doing and also told you that he hasn't seen you in a while.
In truth with Aegon you did not speak much and fortunately neither of the two Targaryen brothers mentioned Aemond and for that you were grateful.
You were not thinking about him, not since you came to Highgarden and that is why you felt so at peace with yourself.
Despite being completely focused on your classes and internships more than anything else, you didn't lie to your friends that you had met and talked to a few guys.
You mostly met them at college parties, but nothing formal, it was all just hanging out.
You didn't have the mindset to really date, you didn't feel like you needed to and really a Highgarden guy didn't suit you if you were six months from now coming back to King's Landing.
You just had fun, experienced new things and officially started your psychology training.
And with the date getting closer and closer to return to King's Landing, you realized you didn't want to leave. Neither did Vhagar. At least not yet.
You grew attached very quickly to everything at Highgarden, even Vhagar with her walks in the parks and the view of the sunset when you took her for a stroll around the lake as well.
Everything was quiet and you felt at peace. However, you admit that you miss your friends and your life at King's Landing.
It's kind of a bittersweet taste to have to leave to go home. You definitely plan to come back because you've even grown quite fond of Dr. Winslow.
Until finally the date arrives and it's time to go back.
It was six months and yet it felt like it all happened in a matter of weeks. Yet you know you enjoyed every second at Highgarden and you don't feel like you wasted any time.
You immediately text your mom that you have landed at King's Landing and you also send a picture of your arrival to the group chat with Aileen, Sara and Ryan.
You call for an Uber and soon you find yourself arriving at the dorm with Vhagar in your arms.
The man driver helps you carry your bags up to your room, which you couldn't feel more grateful for, and as you enter that small space where you started your dependency, you feel nostalgic because you had missed it and happy because you are back.
And not long after you arrived, of course your friends would pay you an unannounced visit to welcome you back.
"You have to tell us everything.”
"And you have to show us the pictures you didn't upload to your Instagram."
"Did you meet cute guys?"
"How was your dorm?"
"How is the food?"
"We have to go to a party to celebrate."
You laugh as you notice the excitement in Aileen and Sara who are the ones asking all the questions while you and Ryan watch them with a small, amused smile.
And even though you didn't answer their questions, they still say they should get something to eat and drag you along with them to tell them everything.
Ryan takes them to a fast food restaurant in the middle of the university and soon the table is filled with fries, sodas, burgers, pizza and so on.
"You have to go one day, the program for the psychology internships are the best. The school is not that big, but the teachers are amazing, they even organize tours to many mental clinics of all kinds for all the students themselves. The only bad thing | could tell you about Highgarden is the food, it's not that good."
"Ugh no, dont tell me that,” says Aileen with a long-suffering face, "Don't make me change my mind about choosing Highgarden over Dorne if | get to go on exchange next year."
"But why would you want to go to a desert?” Ryan asks her confused, "Do you like to get your ass all sweaty?"
"Dorne is a place with incredible wonders and a lot of history, in case you didn't know,” she says seriously, "l've always wanted to see Sunspear."
"Just like any other place, genius. Besides, don't you know the temperatures reported in Dorne? It's like living in hell,” Ryan tells her incredulously. "l'm more supportive of Sara's idea to go to Winterfell where, if she's lucky, she'Il be able to go beyond the North and see the Wall. l'd rather do that than be dying of heat."
"So you'd rather be freezing to death?"
"Yes. A million times yes."
"And what about the parties?"
Sara asks you, picking up the subject and leaving aside for a moment Aileen and Ryan who continue arguing about Dorne and any other place in Westeros where according to Ryan it's better.
“They're not as noisy as here, but you still have a good time," you confess.
"Of course you have a good time,” Sara tells you mischievously, "All those guys you met seemed like they would really show you a good time."
You lower your gaze with a small embarrassed smile.
"It was just for the moment, that's all."
"And you didn't have any luck with any of them?"
You deny, looking at her again.
"I didn't want to. It wasn't...” You let out a sigh, "lt wasn't ideal."
"Oh come on, why not?” she asks incredulously, offended, "Didn't you get a good look at them? They were very handsome, Y/N. And they were just videos you sent us, I'm sure they were really hot in person."
You let out a small laugh, denying again.
"I didn't want to get attached to one of them, let alone start dating because | knew |'d be back here,” you confess, "And the whole long-distance relationships thing... it's not really my thing."
Sara grimaces and gives you a look of understanding at the same time.
"Well," she sighs, "At least you had fun with them."
"Not with all of them,” you clarify amused.
"But you did, so that counts."
After talking some more with Sara, since Aileen and Ryan are still busy debating... or rather fighting, you leave your part of the money for them to pay the bill while you go to the bathroom.
When you return, as you walk towards the table with your friends, a voice you know very well despite not having heard it in a while makes you stop as you hear your name called out.
"Y/N?"
And when you turn your head, a surprised Aegon Targaryen looks at you with a huge smile, standing with him is Helaena, apparently both of them having just arrived at the restaurant.
For an instant you panic at the thought that he's probably here too, but you're relieved to see that it's just the two of them.
"Is that you? Really?"
Aegon asks you amused, wasting no time in approaching you with Helaena following him and you also smile in his direction and shorten the distance between the two of you.
"It's been a long time since l've seen you too, Egg."
"Oh you little devil, you haven't forgotten how much | hate it when you call me that."
You both laugh and he wraps you in a tight hug that you reciprocate with the same affection, because even though Aemond was your best friend, you are still fond of all his brothers and nephews who have always been very good to you.
"Where have you been hiding? I haven't seen you for years."
He tells you incredulously, separating from you and you shrug your shoulders, already anticipating that you will talk about him. And even if you don't want to, you'll still have to.
"You know... here and there,” you say without much detail, shrugging your shoulders.
"Here and there where?" he asks you amused.
"Well... at school, with my friends and also at my exchange."
“But I dont see you around our house anymore, not even on birthdays, you didn't go to the ball either," he says almost in a sad tone, "You don't talk to my brother anymore, do you?" he asks a little more seriously, "Since the ball happened and he didn't take you, I knew something had happened. It seemed strange to me since you always went together every year."
You let out a long breath, lick your lips and nod, not wanting to give more importance to that matter that already happened many months ago.
"Yeah," you smile a little, affirming, "Yeah, since then."
"Forgive him,” Helaena stands between the two of you, with a smile and a sorry look, "l told him clearly that he won't ask you about him if he sees you when you come back, but his mental capacity is so low that the idiot doesn't understand."
You can't help but laugh at this, while Aegon at her side looks at her offended.
"l only wanted to corroborate what you told me,” he says innocently.
"Corroborate?" Helaena asks him.
"Yes," he says at once, still offendead, "I didn't believe you. At least not much. The two of them were inseparable and to suddenly not be friends anymore... it was like when | found out that Jack and Rose never existed and it was just a fictional story for the Titanic movie, I couldn't believe it and i felt cheated."
"Shut the fuck up."
Helaena says to him with a bad face and then turns to you with the smile and the softest and most pleasant look so characteristic of her.
"l'm so happy you're back. I didn't even know you were back, if i had known i would have texted you and we would have gone for a coffee."
"Thank you, Hel,” you smile softly at her, "And no, i didn't say anything about coming back and i honestly don't know why. I was so sad to leave but at the same time i was desperate to be back home."
"And what about Highgarden?" she asks you excitedly, "l've always been looking forward to going there. The nature there is just wonderful. There are lots of aquariums, isn't there?"
"Yes, yes, everything is amazing," you assure her, "Except the food. That's my only complaint. Everything is too... healthy"
"Oh yes, i knew that already," she says to you in understanding.
"And where do you live now that you don't live with my brother anymore?" Aegon asks interested, "Did you rent an apartment for yourself?"
"No, no, i live in a dorm now,” you clarify, "Because of the scholarship i got a big discount, and with the money i got paid for my internship at Highgarden, i have a chance to look for another job around here for a month."
"Oh, great,” he nods, listening to you attentively.
"A friend of mine who works at a boutique nearby recently told me they're looking for female employees. She works part time, maybe you have the same schedule if i pass you her number and she gives you more information."
Helaena tells you with such confidence that you're thankful that the first day you've been back to King's Landing, she's already saved you from looking for a job.
The flower shop where you worked before is already full of employees since your quitting, Sara told you since she went to ask to let you know before returning to King's Landing.
And now Helaena has helped you with that.
"That would help me a lot, Hel. Thank you so much."
"Oh, it's nothing,” she says nonchalantly taking her phone, "I'II tell my friend and then I'll pass you her number, don't worry."
After talking and keeping up with both of you for a few more minutes, your friends call you to leave and that's when the three of you say goodbye.
They both tell you if you want to keep them company, but since you've already eaten and you also have a mess in your room that needs to be cleaned up for your return, you agree to go out to dinner next week.
And just as you say, that's what happens once you're back in your dorm.
Vhagar greets you and keeps you company as you start to get all your clothes, shoes, make-up and all your stuff out of the suitcases. You also get something in and start arranging your few pieces of furniture in different ways in your space, wanting to try something new.
You put all your clothes in your closet, not wanting to leave anything for later, that takes some time, also to sweep and rearrange everything as you had it in your small bathroom.
You even fill a basket with clothes that need to be washed and go down to the laundry room, really not wanting to leave anything for later knowing that you have busy weeks ahead of you because of college and you want to get everything ready.
You wait for the clothes to be washed and also to dry, then go back to your room and continue organizing everything.
Until the sunset starts to show through your window and realizing that you are not missing anything anymore, you can finally lay down on your bed with Vhagar and rest.
You pick up your phone and begin to entertain yourself with Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, letting the time pass.
Vhagar settles in next to you and you get more comfortable to start watching Tiktoks, entertaining yourself for another good time.
You think to yourself that maybe later you'll go downstairs to buy something from the vending machine and watch a movie or maybe a series until you fall asleep, sounding like an awesome plan for you.
Then you finally get up, grab your most comfortable clothes and take a bath. It doesn't take you long and you dry your hair, then you feed Vhagar and take money to go buy food and watch the movie or series.
When suddenly there is a knock on your door.
You watch it in silence, thinking confused that you are not expecting anyone. And you have no idea who it could be. You didn't agree with your friends that they would come here later if you've already seen each other in the morning.
You check your messages to see if any of your friends told you they were coming to visit you unexpectedly, but nothing.
So you go to open the door thinking that it must be one of your friends and they decided not to tell you about coming over, but when you open your door you didn't expect it to be your ex-best friend, Aemond.
You freeze the moment you see him, definitely not expecting it.
As his gaze lights up when he sees you and the two of you are face to face after what felt like an eternity of the two of you not seeing each other.
You unconsciously take a step back, surprised and confused, your lips parted, as he watches you intently, almost with a hopeful look, maybe because he's afraid you'll slam the door in his face.
But you don't move from shock because you didn't expect it to be him and you didn't expect to see him so suddenly after so many months.
And he… hasn't changed.
You know it's only been months, there's not much difference, but it's the same appearance since the last time you saw him. His hair is still short to your surprise and his clothing style is the same.
What you do notice are the muscles on his arms are more pronounced and you also get the impression that he is a little taller.
While you… what can you say about yourself? Really nothing.
The only new thing you've done is to start trotting in the mornings, also your hair is short below your shoulders when before you had it down to your waist and you've put more earrings in both ears.
And neither of you say anything.
The two of you are simply inspecting each other after a long time without seeing each other, you mostly feeling just as confused to see him here.
You really don't understand how he is here. Or rather how he knew you were already back.
He certainly couldn't have known, you still have him blocked from all your social media networks.
Then….?
You ask yourself but the answer comes to you in a second.
Aegon.
You think in affirmative mode. And also probably Helaena because the three of you met at the restaurant. But you know it was Aegon who must have told him everything.
You don't doubt that maybe Hel wanted to kill him.
When after a few more seconds, the two of them not speaking and just watching each other, you finally react, instantly feeling nervous, without really knowing why.
Also that little remorse comes to your chest for everything that happened between you and what happened the last time you saw each other, remembering everything you told him crying.
You hug yourself and bite the inside of your cheek, also as he is looking at you, remembering his girlfriend, the ball and also your birthday.
When he speaks first.
"Hi."
He says to you letting out a sigh afterwards, stirring in front of you, keeping his hands in his jacket pockets, which are movements you know he does when he's nervous.
Also his look tells you he's a bit worried and anxious, but he still stands tall in front of you, his lilac eye watching you intently and having a slight gleam in it.
And his sapphire in your direction… it looks just as beautiful and stunning as ever.
"Hi."
You answer him with your tone of voice a little lower and feeling a little uncomfortable, puzzled, but you also stand firm in front of him, feeling nervous.
You certainly weren't prepared for when this moment happened and you know he wasn't either, yet here he is.
"W-what are you doing here?"
You ask trying not to let your voice sound shaky, holding back.
He swallows hard and looks away from you for a moment while he presses his lips together, to look at you again with those nerves and that certain hope.
"Actually… I wasn't too sure about coming here," he confesses with a soft look in his eyes, just like his voice, "Aegon told me you had returned to King's Landing and I wanted to see it myself."
At this, you lower your gaze for a moment and bite your lips. Yet… strangely… you don't feel upset.
"He told me by accident and got a good punch from Helaena," he adds and you look at him again.
You don't say anything for a few seconds, just look away from him, swallow hard and let out a long breath.
"Well, it's true, I'm back. If that's all, you can go now…
"Y/N..."
He calls out to you this time hopefully, interrupting you in a quick tone, not wanting to waste the opportunity and clearly not wanting this to be over any faster than he wants it to be.
It's the first time you've seen each other in months and in all these months a lot has happened and he just… wants to try.
It doesn't matter that you in the end don't want to, that you're still upset and don't want to see him, because he will understand and he will finally respect your decision, but he wants to try first.
He doesn't want to leave without trying.
"I know you probably don't want to, because I know you didn't expect to see me and maybe you even want to kick me out…"
He says lowering his gaze for a second, sighing, and then he looks at you again.
"But I want to risk myself," he tells you honestly, "and I'll understand if you say no, truly," he assures you, "I just want to talk to you and after this, if you still don't want me to bother you anymore, then I won't go near you again, I assure you."
He tells you and you remain paralyzed again for a few seconds, listening to him and watching him with your lips parted.
"And if you want me to leave now, I will. But I just want to try…" he lets out a long breath, gathering his courage, "So…. may I come in, please?"
He asks you softly, watching you just the same and almost expectantly, stirring continuously where he stands, knowing full well that he is as nervous as you are, while you have no idea what to do.
Your mind starts thinking fast, considering what you should and shouldn't do.
But the truth is that nothing comes to your mind. You just have a quick, unexpected debate on whether to let him into your room or not.
Vhagar behind you barks twice, watching Aemond very intently, while repeatedly wagging her tail back and forth excitedly and looking very playful.
While Aemond in front of you watches her with excitement and some hope, to again focus on you, ready to face the decision you will make, either yes or no.
And finally after what feels like an eternity, you know that rejecting him is probably the best option, but for some reason… you can't find the courage to do it.
And not because seeing him now in front of you and having heard his words has softened your heart, but because you realize that your heart doesn't hurt like it used to.
Maybe it was all the time you stayed apart and you healed in Highgarden, helped by the change of air, your lifestyle and the new people around you, unconsciously overcoming everything that happened between you, that you don't feel that pain anymore.
However… you do feel a weight. A weight on your shoulders and in your heart.
And it is because of that weight that after considering it in depth, with your soft gaze, you step aside and open the door wider, allowing him the entrance to your room.
Aemond would be lying if at that moment he didn't feel as if he had just received the news that he won the lottery, because surprise overcomes him and also relief.
And not wanting you to take it back, he enters your room, thanking you with his gaze in silence, while you control your nerves and close the door, facing this.
He in an instant is already in Vhagar who eagerly and seemingly happily enjoys being in his arms and licks his hands and cheeks, making him laugh and give her kisses, caressing her.
You can't help but smile a little at the scene, but you are just the same neutral and firm.
When he watches you over Vhagar, he leaves another kiss on her head and sets her back down on your bed, now looking as if he has no idea what to do.
He honestly didn't think it would go this far. He thought you'd slam the door in his face.
But you're both here. Face to face with each other. And certainly with a lot of things to say that you couldn't say to each other before.
"Hmm…" he says, stirring and glancing briefly at your room, "Did I interrupt you with something important?"
He asks and watches you intently, to which you deny, crossing your arms.
"No," you answer softly, "I was just planning to go buy something from the vending machine downstairs and watch something, a movie or a series."
"Oh," he nods, understanding, "well, if you want, I'll go," he offers, "you haven't eaten anything?"
"No. You?"
"I haven't either. But I can go and buy some dinner for both of us, only if you want. There are many restaurants near here."
"Well…
You stir uncomfortably.
"Only if you want."
"Yeah, no problem," he assures you.
And again he leaves you alone in your room saying he will be back soon, making you sigh and sit on your bed with an almost terrified expression… not expecting or understanding any of this.
The fact that he's gone to buy food helps you mentally prepare yourself for when he comes back, having no idea how they'll start talking about everything that happened.
You don't even know what he will tell you first, but you calm down and use the time he has given you to not feel nervous and terrified.
You take a deep breath, you say that everything will be fine, that this shouldn't be awkward… or at least not too awkward and that if both you and he start to feel like it's too much, you can both say so.
And of course you don't want any of this to lead to a fight. It wouldn't be wise and it's totally unnecessary.
When after a few minutes, Aemond returns with Chinese food, soda and fries from the vending machine.
He actually buys you some of your favorite chips and has also ordered you the Chinese food exactly the way you like it. At this you just thank him and both of you settle into your bed.
You put Vhagar down, give him some of her food and the two of you begin to eat.
At first it did feel a little awkward, but then, as you talk about the food being delicious and ask both of you to pass such things around, the mood begins to lighten and it's like going back to when you both lived together.
The two of them are comfortable, eating, talking about anything and watching a movie, although this time there is no movie.
And he is the first to start a conversation.
"How was Highgarden?" he observes you attentively, his gaze soft, interested.
"Incredible," you answer without hesitation.
He nods, as the two of you put more pieces of food in your mouths and then you take a sip from your bottle of soda.
"You told me that's where the best psychology internship programs are, right?"
"Yes," you affirm, "When I found out I got into the exchange program, it was the first place I applied."
"And you didn't have any problems?"
"No," you observe him softly, "Because of my good grades they didn't deny me anything, they gave me one of the first places in internships for Highgarden and everything was a very fast process. And when I got there and met the psychologist in charge of me and his clinic… it was just amazing."
"Yeah," he murmurs, "yeah, I can imagine. And I'm happy for you."
He tells you honestly, with a small smile that you return. A genuine smile from both of us.
"Thank you."
"And how did it all go? What was that you were doing? Did you get to know all of Highgarden too?"
And you tell him everything.
You tell him how your first weeks were, how was your dorm, the university, the new people you met, your internship, Dr. Arthur, what you had to do and you even told him about some very interesting cases.
You also told him about the places you met, showed him pictures and videos. You tell him that you went out partying on a few weekends, all the while he listens to you and watches you with great attention, looking genuinely interested, and asking you more questions.
Until you have nothing more to tell him about your six months at Highgarden.
"What about you? Haven't you started your internship yet?"
You ask him interestedly.
"Yes, since April," he says, "Obviously it wasn't difficult. I'm going to my father's company and I got some of my friends to do their internships there as well.
"Oh," you nod, understanding, "and what do you say?"
"What do I say?" he repeats, letting out a sigh, "well, it's not as interesting as what you told me," he says with a small smile, "It's all finance, paperwork, computer programs and so on. But that's what I like and I've been doing very well."
"Yes," you murmur, looking at a spot in your room, "But it's interesting," you tell him, "I've always thought you'd end up like one of the characters in Succession, someday running your father's important company as a rich and powerful man.
He smiles softly and then looks at you, to which you also smile in his direction.
"Am I right?" you ask him amused.
"In fact yes, you are absolutely right," he assures you in the same way.
There's no more food except for chips and soda, so he then starts talking to you more about his life and everything he's been doing lately besides college and his internship.
All while you both stare at an unimportant spot in your room, side by side, eating junk food.
And you listen to him with close attention, really interested in wanting to know what his life has been like now that you are no longer a part of it.
He tells you about how he has spent more time with his family, he tells you about Daeron, Rhaenyra, Daemon and even his cousins and nephews, Jace, Luke, Joffrey, Baela and Rhaena.
He tells you how they all spent a small part of the summer on Driftmark, an island near Dragonstone where his whole family also has a property right there, but which belongs to his aunt and uncle Rhaenys and Corlys.
You knew about Driftmark, but never in your years of friendship with Aemond did he invite you there because all his family always organized anything in his huge mansion here in King's Landing or in Dragonstone.
He also tells you about upcoming birthdays and everything his mother has planned.
And in everything he talks about, he doesn't mention Alys at all, maybe for fear that you might get upset or uncomfortable and want him to leave, because you don't dare ask him about her either.
You just let him talk to you about the first thing that comes to his mind, both of you comfortable in your bed and still eating junk food.
When Aemond seems to have told you everything and you both stay in a comfortable silence, almost shoulder to shoulder, both of you watching your little room and just letting time pass by.
And that's when Aemond watches you with his soft gaze, while you continue to eat fried food, staring into nothing. He swallows hard and lets out a long breath.
"I owe you an apology."
You freeze for a moment, still looking at everything around you but him, surprised by his words and beginning to understand where this is going.
Unable to help yourself, you look at him and he looks at you with a look that is both serious and gentle, looking honest, only to look away, maybe because of nerves, and continue talking.
"I was a very bad friend to you," he says in a murmur, "what I did to you is something unforgivable, I know, something you didn't deserve," he admits, "I don't expect you to forgive me Y/N, I'm not asking for that, I just want to talk to you and that you listen to me, that….
"I don't want to listen to your apologies only if you say them out of pity, Aemond," you interrupt him, serious.
"What? No, no, this is not for pity, Y/N," he assures you, honest and desperate to clarify, "I never felt pity for you and you know it."
"I don't know," you mutter, "After what happened, you made me doubt if our friendship was genuine or because you wanted and were my friend for pity," you confess.
"Y/N…" he tells you in a sigh, sad, denying, "since you left… since we stopped seeing and talking to each other… you don't know everything I wanted to tell you, everything I wanted to apologize for even if you didn't forgive me."
"Aemond…" you call him cautiously, "you can't apologize to me just to make me forgive you and your girlfriend too, you….
"I broke up with Alys."
He interrupts you with the most honest and quickest sentence he's ever said in all the time you've been together, making you freeze once more and stare at him with your lips parted.
And he watches you with the most honest look, wanting to clarify that point as much as possible and that there is no doubt, even feeling proud to say it.
"I broke up with her days after you left the apartment, and that was the last time we saw each other," he explains, in a low, honest tone.
But even after telling you that, you don't feel entirely confident. That's why you lower your gaze and swallow hard as you consider how strong his relationship was.
"But if you go back with her, I don't….
"No, Y/N," he says to you in denial, "I'm done with her for good," he assures you, "I didn't want to and I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore. I don't care anymore, she's nothing to me and never really was in all the time we were together."
You listen to him surprised, attentive, breathing a little faster than usual, not understanding, while he then starts to tell you everything.
Everything he wanted to tell you since your friendship started to fall apart and the moment it broke.
"Alys managed to get my attention a lot when we first met. She led me to believe on our first few dates that a relationship could be good, healthy and loving. But when we finally formalized everything, she started to show herself as the real person she is when she already had me," he explains, "And I naively gave her everything she asked for, even money, because I was obsessed with her and the way she made me feel. She made me feel so unique, so wanted and so special that I-I just…" he lets out a sigh, "I let her hold me in the palm of her hand."
He brings one of his hands to the nape of his neck, ruffling his short hair with his fingers, feeling strange telling you all this, but also feeling it as a necessity for you to listen and understand him.
And you really don't have any problem, you listen to him carefully and let him tell you everything he wants to tell you, still feeling a little sharp pain in your chest.
"She would even tell me things she didn't agree with or like, either about me or my family, making me feel bad and upset sometimes, but then she would turn them into just a point of view and convince me that I had misunderstood her, when I hadn't," he explains to you, "She told me that my mother was very controlling after she met her, that my siblings, even Helaena, seemed very weird to her, and that Daemon didn't seem like a good person."
You are surprised to hear that and pay more attention, while Aemond feels ashamed of himself for telling you this, but it is the truth.
"In that instant I should have put a stop to her, I know. But like the fucking idiot I am, I kept letting myself be easily manipulated by her, because she kept telling me it was just her first impression and her views," he says in a low, sorrowful whisper, "She just had a long conversation with my father without looking bored. I even noticed she changed her attitude and looked more… kind. But only with him."
He says in a bitter tone, while you understand what he's going on about.
"And of course, how could she not be nicer to him," he says with a smile and a bitter look, "With her about to graduate, she told him about that and also about her internship with the man who owns the most important company in the country. She talked about everything she knows and her skills, almost telling him her entire resume so he would hire her."
Now you let out a long breath, must have imagined it.
You thought Alys had really fallen in love with him. That's what you always thought until today when he gave you the news that he broke up with her months ago and that there was no love in the relationship.
You always thought that no girl could reject Aemond for his personality and his looks, that no one could reject him for being him, for knowing him and in an instant wanting to know more about him.
Because that's how you fell in love with him, you didn't fall in love because of what he had and what he could offer you professionally and economically.
But that was just what caught Alys' attention, not his personality and his heart.
"It also happened that when I would talk to her about my classes or an important project that I had worked hard on and got an excellent grade, she would say that it wasn't enough and that I needed to work harder to earn my father's company. She discredited everything I did, telling me that I had to do more so that someday I could be the boss and both of us could run the company, talking about those kinds of plans and almost assuring me that it would be like that," he says seriously and bitterly, "She insulted my friends, saying that they only cared about parties, that they were alcoholics and did not care about their studies, that they were useless and did not contribute anything to me now and would not do so in the future. She also said that I should have more serious and professional friends around me."
He lets out a long breath, really at that moment with you by your side realizing more how really bad his relationship was, the kind of very nasty girl he had by his side and how very blinded he was.
"The same thing happened with you," he says to you, saddened, "Clearly you know because you heard that conversation."
You bite your lips, remembering how bad she made you feel with her words. And so does he, corroborating with her.
"I owe you more than an apology for that, Y/N," he tells you honestly, "You were right, a best friend doesn't leave her best friend aside and that time I didn't even defend you. I should have stopped her, I should have put myself firm with her… but I didn't." he says apologetic, sad and disappointed, "and I'm very sorry for that."
Then you realize that you can't accept those apologies, because it really hurt you a lot to hear that conversation and that he didn't stand up for you because of the way you are and what you like to do.
If things had been the other way around, you would have defended Aemond with all your might, because he was your best friend.
"She was the reason why I started to leave you aside on weekends, why I gradually left you living alone and also why I didn't take care of Vhagar anymore, because she doesn't like dogs," he says seriously and sighs, "She was also the one who convinced me to take her to the ball and planned everything so I would forget your birthday," he confesses to you, saddened. "She deleted messages from you that morning, she confessed it to me when I confronted her when I realized that your birthday had already passed and that even weeks later she made me stay with her so I wouldn't see you. She also planned that stupid two hour dinner with her parents to delay me so I wouldn't notice and let the whole one night go by."
You bite your lips again, not watching him, feeling the urge to cry remembering that day, your birthday, because he also made you feel so bad during and still after by not getting any explanation from him.
And all because of her. But also for him, because he wouldn't put a stop to it.
"And yet I was still with her…" he says in a sigh, incredulous and disappointed in himself, "Like I said, she had me exactly the way she wanted me to be, and she would convince me otherwise when she didn't like something or made me behave differently than she wanted me to."
He shakes his head, feeling annoyed with himself for allowing it, for having fallen so low, letting himself be moved by her as she wanted, making him start to think that his friends were less important than her, his girlfriend.
That she was more important than Y/N, his best friend, who had always been there for him in very good and very difficult times, leaving her and throwing away their friendship of years for a relationship of months.
"She knew exactly what to do and what to say to make me stay," he murmurs, "But Alys never loved me and never really cared for me. She only cared about me out of interest and wanted to be with me out of the same interest, which was all she cared about."
"Did you love her?"
You dare to ask him without observing him, with a thread of voice, while Aemond at your side watches you for a few moments in silence and with his eye wide open in surprise.
I didn't expect you to ask him that, in fact I didn't expect any questions at all, but despite that, he knows the answer.
He knows it since the last time they both saw each other.
"No."
He respond in a low tone but completely serious and honest, while you dare to observe him surprised, but with an almost expressionless gaze and your lips parted.
"At first I came to have a certain affection for her … but only at first," he confesses, "Then it became that obsession with how she made me feel, but nothing else. I never came to love her and I am very relieved by that."
You take your eyes off him, closing your eyes for a moment, letting go of a long breath.
"And after I didn't see you again and I found out that you had gone on exchange… you don't know how that made me feel, Y/N," he swallows hard, "I had lost one of the most important people in my life. life for a fucking relationship and my own behavior. I wasn't thinking, I was an idiot. And I just wanted to scream and break everything for losing you… for not fixing it sooner."
An ugly and huge lump forms in your throat, observing an unimportant point in your room, your gaze lost and your eyes beginning to fill with tears.
You really didn't want to feel that way, you didn't want his words to soften you up, yet…they did.
But you hold back as much as you can, while Aemond next to you feels the same thing that you are feeling, but he doesn't dare to do anything about it, realizing your state, wanting to give you your space.
When you finally take a deep breath and talk to him even without looking at him.
“I missed you a lot too, Aemond. I missed you throughout your relationship with Alys and after I left to Highgarden. I missed you even when you didn't even deserve it."
You confess in a low and honest murmur, completely drawing his attention, you saying nothing else for a few seconds, swallowing the lump in your throat and completely holding back your tears.
While he listens to you and watches surprised, not expecting that, since he thought that all this time you had been hating him. He even thinks you hate him now.
And yes, if it was something like that, there was hatred, resentment, anger and courage for everything that happened, but even so, you also missed it very much.
You missed him, but you didn't forgive him.
"You also don't know how much I hate myself for ending our friendship, Y/N," he tells you in a sad and regretful whisper.
When you look back at him.
“I cannot forgive you, Aemond. Not yet."
And your words are like a dagger in the heart, a wound that, despite the fact that it hurts, accepts and respects it. He certainly didn't expect you to forgive him, but telling him that you had missed him, too, lit a small spark of hope in him. But it was not like that.
And he really respects it.
He doesn't want to make the same mistakes again, and so he does, feeling less weight on his shoulders, relieved that there aren't all those negative feelings between you anymore.
Nor does he expect that after this, everything will be back to the way it was before, because it won't.. He knows it's impossible. And if everything really ends between you both, then he will respect that too.
That's why he nods in your direction, both of you looking into each other's eyes, a understanding look and a small, soft, closed-mouthed smile on his lips, letting you know he's perfectly fine with that.
"Yes, i know," he assures you softly. “It's alright, I understand."
You nod gently in his direction, also placing a small gentle smile and both of you take your gazes away from each other and immersing in a comfortable silence.
Comfortable because finally neither of you feels that weight anymore and everything seems to be… fine.
Both of you have already said everything you wanted to say.
Or almost.
Because in the middle of that silence, Aemond starts thinking fast, having an indecisive debate in his mind, telling himself that enough has been enough, that everything is fine between you now and he doesn't want to ruin it.
But his heart tells him to do it, that there is still more.
While you by his side take your bottle of soda and take a sip, comfortable, this feeling good, but also knowing that this does not mean that the two will resume their friendship.
But for the moment… you enjoy it. You enjoy the moment.
And that's when he speaks again.
"After you left King's Landing…
He starts and you watch him, getting your attention.
"Helaena told me something," let out a long breath, "Something that made me finally realize my feelings and that made me have a little hope, even though you were already gone."
You are still watching him with attention, not having the slightest idea that it could be that what his sister told him, when Aemond looks up at you and looks into your eyes with his soft and honest gaze.
"She told me that you're in love with me."
Your hands become paralyzed first, you stop drinking soda and then your whole body is the one that is motionless, while you observe it with your lips between open, with your confused, attentive and nervous look at the same time.
You don't understand anything.
It's not like you told Helaena about it, in fact no one knows.
And it only makes you feel more nervous that Aemond is there, right next to you, acting completely normal about it, now that he already knows, continuing to observe you in the same way.
But you can't speak, you're still in shock, starting to feel like your pulse is racing too fast.
"She told me that you didn't tell her anything, that she just… knows," he says to you later, still in a soft tone, still making you panic.
You turn your gaze away from him, blink several times, starting to react from panic and nerves and hold your drink tightly.
"You should go."
It's all you say in a thread of voice, not daring to look him in the eye any more and you quickly get up from your bed, wanting to put as much distance as possible between the two of you.
You take Aemond by surprise, who stands up slightly, watching you worried, desperate and a little confused as you go to your door.
When his next words cause you to become paralyzed again, tensing up completely.
"I'm in love with you, too."
He says to you almost desperately, wanting to clarify as soon as possible, watching you attentively and cautiously, slowly getting out of bed to address you very carefully, not wanting to upset you more.
And he begins to explain to you with his soft tone, waiting for the moment so that he turns to you and can talk to you in the eyes, wanting you to see how very honest he is being with you.
"I don't know since when exactly, Y/N. It was probably before we graduated from high school," he lets you know, "That's why I asked you to live with me, because I certainly wouldn't have asked just anyone, and I-I… wanted to be close to you, almost all the time."
Your pulse continues to race, listening to his words carefully, feeling again the urge to cry, even without daring to look at him face to face.
"And all those dates, all those girls I went out with or flirted with at parties…" he sighs, "I told myself that I didn't get any further with them because it just hadn't worked out, when the truth is that I was fooling myself and it was me who didn't take them any further… because they weren't you."
He confesses to you and that's when you can't take it anymore and the first tears fall, starting to shake and with the realization starting to become clear to you as you hear it.
"And I wanted to repress my feelings for you with them, I wanted to fall in love with someone because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, Y/N," he tells you honestly, "And I know it sounds stupid and it's probably tired of hearing it already… but it's the truth. You don't know how much I was terrified of losing you, of losing our friendship because of feelings that weren't reciprocated… or that I thought weren't reciprocated."
Then slowly, Aemond, dares to raise his hand and gently touch your arm, turning you towards him very carefully and tactfully, needing to see you and needing you to see him.
And you let him.
Shaking, but you let him.
And his heart breaks the moment he sees you, with your sad, surprised face, your teary eyes and red cheeks, watching him as if he can't believe it.
"I wish I had known, Y/N," he says softly, watching you with all the love and gentleness in the world, "Because then Alys came, a girl with a personality I hadn't met before, pretending to be a good person and she made me distract myself from you by falling into her games."
You bite your lips, holding back the tears as much as you can, while he continues talking to you and explaining with all the sincerity in the world.
"And I know I was very selfish with all those girls and also with you when I saw you with that guy at that party, having a good time and having fun without me," he confesses with regret, "You don't know how upset I was and how terribly jealous I felt, Y/N. That was when I thought I had lost you for good and I hated myself not only for having ended our friendship, but also for never having confessed my feelings to you and realizing too late… what I lost for a person who wasn't worth it."
He lets out a long breath, biting the inside of his cheek and watching you with all the sincerity, love and affection as he says his next words.
"I love you, Y/N. I have always loved you. Just in the same way you love me…. or loved me," he corrects with a soft sad tone, "I was just too much of a coward to tell you and I didn't give you a chance to tell me either by going out and pretending with all those girls," he lowers his gaze, "I'm sorry."
Then, it's like you're living in a dream.
You don't know if it's real or not.
But you know it's real because of his touch on your arm and the closeness between the two of you, with him looking at you like that, being so terribly honest that it scares you.
It scares you because this is just what you wanted to hear.
This is everything you wanted to hear from him towards you, being just another one of your most pathetic and impossible dreams. But here you are. He has told you.
And that's exactly why you can't control it anymore and right there, in front of him, you lose it completely and the first sob escapes your lips, just as your tears are rushing down your cheeks.
You cover your face completely ashamed, crying, only you don't know if it's from happiness or sadness… or probably both.
But you know you cry because this is what you have been longing to hear for a very long time and you cry wondering why now, why now that things between you are no longer bad but not quite right either.
But mostly you cry because you feel confused.
Since you left King's Landing, one of your purposes was to leave him behind and forget, to undo those feelings for him. But you couldn't.
You still love him.
You love your best friend just the same way he loves you too, being something that was going on for a long time, simultaneously, but without both of you knowing it.
And you feel confused because you don't know if you should finally take this thing you've always wanted, you don't know because of everything that happened, even though he has already explained and apologized to you.
But you don't feel totally confident because he really hurt you so much.
And you don't know if what happened, will happen again and that's just what you don't want. You don't want him to hurt you again.
And Aemond, surprised by your behavior, yet he understands you and doesn't judge you.
That's why he wastes no time and pulls you into a gentle, firm and comforting embrace, letting himself be carried away by his feelings as well.
And you don't push him away. You let him hold you and lock you in his arms, just like you loved him to do when you lived together or saw each other during the day because his hugs have always comforted you and made you feel safe.
And that's also where you can let out your feelings.
He starts to comfort you too with soft words in your ear, stroking your hair with his hand, telling you that it's okay, that everything is fine, that this shouldn't change anything either, that you are the one who has the last word about the two of you.
As he continues to apologize for everything in soft murmurs, holding you tightly against him, not letting you go until you are well.
Until little by little, your sobs begin to decrease and you begin to calm down, sniffling your nose and still hugging him, taking all the time you need until your whole roller coaster of emotions stops.
Aemond doesn't let go, but does so slowly as you begin to stir, watching you intently and worriedly.
You bring your hands to your cheeks, wiping away your tears and sniffling your nose, to which he quickly runs his thumbs over your cheeks as well, still watching you with all that tenderness, that understanding and that affection.
"Are you all right, my pretty one? Do you need anything?"
You deny, again embarrassed, but at least feeling better and less emotional.
"N-no. I'm just… sorry, it wasn't m-my inte…
"Shh, no, it's okay," he interrupts you softly, "it's okay. This was my fault, I never meant to make you react like this. I should have been more careful with you."
"It wasn't that, Aemond," you confess, sniffling once more, "You took me by surprise, that's all. And I-I c-couldn't control myself, i-it was too much."
"Yes, I know, I know, pretty one. It's all right, everything's all right."
And again he pulls you into a soft, comforting embrace that you allow, now no longer feeling like those earlier hugs where before between the two of you there was the word friendship.
Now it's something more… something more intimate and more… honest.
And that's because both of you finally know each other's true feelings.
But still… after this, what you need is time. And that's exactly what you're asking for.
i couldn't tag many of you and I apologize if you asked me to tag you and I didn't, I could have missed your user but thank u so much for reading 😢❤
tag list:
@winxschester @namoreno @fan-goddess @lauftivy @bellameshipper @iloveallmyboys @barnes70stark @amazingnerd @yentroucnagol @helaenaluvr @almostpurplelady @lilitheal @targaryenmoony @dangerousstateofmind @summerposie
#aemond fanfiction#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen x y/n#aemond targaryen x you#aemond x fem!reader#aemond x oc#aemond x reader#hotd aemond
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Tsukasa Shishio x f!Reader | WC: 1692 | 18+ only! MDNI!
Summary: After missing Tsukasa's birthday, you decide to come by his flat unannounced with a special surprise in mind.
You missed Tsukasa's birthday. In fact, you had completely forgotten about it. There wasn't any party planned, so you had gone out of town for the weekend, only to see on social media Senkuu and Kohaku posting stories with pictures of themselves and Tsukasa while wishing him a happy birthday.
Being Tsukasa's new girlfriend, you had considered doing the same, but instead you came up with an even better way to give him a "present", onee that you hoped he would appreicate much more than a fleeting moment of recognition on social media.
When you got back to your city, you decided to pay Tsukasa a surprise visit. As expected, he was there and was in his room watching YouTube videos when you rang his doorbell. He greeted you with an initially perterbed expression, grumpy from his watching being interrupted, but soon smiled as he processed in his mind that it was you who had disturbed him.
"I ... didn't think you were back," he said, a little bashful as he didn't look very put together. His hair was a bit messy and he was wearing an old t-shirt and sweatpants.
"I got back this afternoon. Can I come in?"
"Of course." Tsukasa stepped to the side as you entered his flat. He closed the door and then smiled, grabbing your hand and giving you a light tug closer to him. Once your eyes were on him, he raised your hand to the height of his lips and gave the back of your hand a soft kiss.
The kiss surprised you, even though such sweet gestures were typical of Tsukasa. Your mind had already been on the "present" you were planning to give him, and the secure kindness he just gave you only let your mind plummet deeper into anticipation.
"Is something wrong?" Tsukasa gave your hand a squeeze and leant closer to you. "No one gave you trouble on the way here, did they?"
"No, I'm fine. I'm just ..." You smiled. "I'm thinking about the birthday present I put together for you."
"Birthday present?" he asked. With a light chuckle, he shook his head. "You didn't need to go through trouble over something like that. I don't need a present. A birthday is no different than any other day."
"But I wanted to give you a present."
A slight shade of pink spread over his cheeks. Feeling himself heat up, Tsukasa cleared his throat and turned around to walk back over towards his room. "As long as it's not one of those Instragram collages, I won't complain."
You laughed and followed him. "You didn't repost any of the ones Senkuu tagged you in."
"Only the one Mirai tagged me in. Besides, Chrom was giving a goofy smile and a thumbs-up in over half of Senkuu's pictures."
Tsukasa walked into his room and sat on his bed with one of his legs hanging off the side. He closed the tab of the nature documentary he was watching on YouTube and looked over to you, smiling with a wave of his hand for you to come closer. "All right. My attention is all yours," he said with a glance towards his laptop. "Unless you want to watch something together."
"Actually, Tsukasa ..." You stepped forward until your feet were at the edge of the bed, your body hovering over him as he looked up at you. "I have something for you to watch."
"What is it?"
"Your birthday present." You leant down to kiss his forehead and then took his hands to press them gently against your body. You knew that you were blushing, but the redness on Tsukasa's cheeks immediately erased all embarrassment. You guided his hands in a dance over your figure and then, in a moment of boldness, you slipped them under your shirt so that his cool palms were against your skin.
You hissed through your teeth from the feeling of your warm stomach melting the chill off of his hands. As your grip loosened on Tsukasa, he began to explore your stomach and waist on his own.
His touch was so gentle, yet strong as his palms lightly pressed and massaged themselves against your stomach. He gazed at his wrists, his lips parted as soft breaths escaped his mouth, and then, as you pulled your shirt over your head and took it off, his eyes widened and his hands squeezed you at your waist.
"It's your birthday present," you said. "Can I keep going?"
In an instant, you were pulled down onto the bed and on top of Tsukasa as he flopped backwards onto the mattress. His arms wrapped around you, squeezing you to his clothed body as his lips moved to your neck and started to suck on you. It was as if he was becoming possessed by the feral yearnings that his state of composure had been fighting to bury for too long of a time.
"Mmgh ..." He purred into your neck and smacked his lips as he sucked harder on your skin. "Don't stop ..."
"Ts-Tsukasa ..." his name slipped past your lips in a light groan as your muscles loosened under his lips. Your hands pressed against his clothed torso and lowered themselves to his hips. Curling your fingers around the band of his sweatpants, you began to pull them down.
"Take them off ..." Tsukasa growled and snapped his hand on top of one of yours to yank his bottoms down. Before you could even feel his bare cock rub against you, your own pants were being shoved down so that they rested limp on your ankles.
Tsukasa panted and grunted, his cock throbbing from the skin to skin contact it was having against your hips. He squirmed in the bed as he kicked off his sweatpants and rose his feet to your ankles to push your own pants off of you.
"Baby, I want you ..." Tsukasa's brown eyes were glazed over with a puppy-dog look begging for more after you had given him a taste of your intentions with him. His long, dark eyelashes only added to how his neediness could get right to your pussy.
"I want you, too ..." you said and started to lift your hips off of his. You sucked in a breath as your skin felt a chill rush over it from not being pressed against his.
Tsukasa's hands gripped your hips as he moved with you to his aching cock. "Let me help you, Baby. I want to make sure we do this together so it feels good."
The way he cared and looked out for you only made your pussy hotter, like it was burning for him. His eyes were filled with a soft concern, genuinely not wanting you to feel even an ounce of pain. You could feel your warm juices trailing towards your folds as you let him help you lower yourself onto him.
You hissed through her teeth as his thick cock stretched you out. "Tsukasa ... ahhh ..."
Tsukasa started to pant and tilted his neck back into the bed. "You feel so good ..." he groaned and started to slowly roll his hips against you.
You lowered yourself down to your elbows, placing them to the sides of Tsukasa's head. Your heart raced and your breathing sped up as you gazed down at him, the sight of his face only strengthening that itching tension at your clit.
"Move with me ..." Tsukasa said and gripped your hips tighter, guiding you into a rhythm with him as his fingers pressed into your flesh.
You kept on grinding him, pressing your hips against him and groaning as his cock pulsed and twitched within you. You always imagined that Tsukasa would feel good, but you never thought he would be this good. The way he was inexperienced made him even sweeter and you soon found yourself moving faster and faster against him to increase that rubbing at your walls.
Tsukasa moaned. "That's it ...! Like that, Baby ...!" He let go of your ass with one of his hands and slipped it near the front of your hips. "I'm gonna make you feel better ... even better ..." He tried to rub the side of his hand near where your clit was, doing everything he could to stimulate you more.
Even though this was your surprise for him, Tsukasa wanted it to be an experience that you would remember always.
"Tsukasa ...!" you moaned his name loudly as the rubbing from his hand seemed to ignite something electrical out of you. Your grinding against him got rougher as you sped up some more.
"I'm ... I'm cumming soon ... almost ..." Tsukasa groaned and panted as he bucked his hips into yours. "Y/n ...!"
There wasn't any more warning before your juices spilled even more all over him, leaking mercilessly past your folds. Tsukasa bucked his hips once more and nearly screamed as he released to fill you up with rapid spirals of his hot cum.
"F-Fuck, Tsukasa!"
He was a panting mess underneath you. His eyes were closed and his head pressing into the mattress. Your walls fluttered like crazy around him and you groaned as you rubbed yourself against him just a little bit more before flopping on top of him and rolling to his side. His arm curled around you, holding you firmly at your waist and squeezing you to his side.
He was never going to let you go.
Once he regathered his breathing, Tsukasa turned to face you. "Y/n ..." he said in a sweet, loving voice and turned on his side so he could wrap both of his arms around you and hug you in his warmth. His body was almost like a furnace after all of that.
You could only smile and nuzzle Tsukasa as he peppered your forehead and cheeks with kisses and gazed at you with the softest kind of endearing love you could imagine.
"You didn't have to wait for my birthday to do that," he said with a gentle chuckle and pressed his lips against yours in a kiss.
#tsukasa shishio#tsukasa dr stone#shishio tsukasa#tsukasa shishio x you#tsukasa shishio x reader#tsukasa shishio x y/n#dr stone x reader#dr stone x you#dr stone x y/n#dr stone smut#tsukasa shishio smut#kinktober 2024#kinktober 24
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Imagine Pope telling Benny you've gone missing while on a stakeout
"Come on man, why all the cloak and dagger?" Benny jibed, "you're going to have to tell us why we're here anyway. Why did we have to follow some ridiculous instructions to get here."
"'cause we're all probably being watched, I couldn't risk anything else going wrong with this mission."
"What do you mean?" Frankie questioned. The atmosphere suddenly got very thick and uneasy.
"I um, so-" Santiago paused, unsure of how to start.
"Spit it out Pope." Tom jumped in.
"Okay, so you know I mentioned the set timings they brought people in, under the cover of night so they had more privacy?" the silence continued, "so with them knowing who I am. I needed to bring in a face they wouldn't bat an eyelid at..."
All four men wore heavy set expressions, cogs turning in their minds at where Santiago was going with this. Benny shared a look with his brother. Not liking where this was going.
"So I called in some help. Just know I didn't force this okay. I asked for a favour."
"Christ man. Spit it out." Will snapped. Not liking how sheepish Santiago was acting.
"It's Y/N. Okay she was doing some night recon for me and two days ago she went radio silent. And we had a strict agreement to check in once every 24 hours. So I knew she was okay." Santiago blurted out.
"Are you fucking kidding?" Benny asked, not sure how to take the news.
"I can't tell you how much I wish I was Ben. I'm sorry."
All five men had a soft spot for you. Having known you for a number of years. Friendships had developed across continents with them. They all cared about your safety as they did each other. Spending time both on the battlefield and at home. You'd even moved cities to be closer to the group. Since then spending a huge chunk of your time with the Miller brothers. Well. One to be particular. Benny and you had a different kind of relationship. One that had never progressed from the gooey eyed longing looks at one another from across the pool table. Among every other place you guys hung out. You supported him ringside at every match. Cheering him on and giving him the push to fight just that little bit harder. Earning you the title of good luck charm after Bennys fourth win in a row once you started coming along.
Saying that you had a special place with all of the guys. You were a constant with Frankies family. Supporting his wife while Frankie had his drug charges cleared up.
You even introduced Will to his fiancée.
Tom had listened to your advice on how he would be able to start repairing his relationship with his daughter. Resulting in them going on their first dad-daughter camping weekend.
Pope had always been a bit of an enigma with the group. But you too had a special place with him. You helped him hash out many a crazy idea. Toning them down when he got too into the idea of taking down huge conglomerates widely known to be untouchable.
"Fuck. Where was she last supposed to reach you?" Benny asked, leaning forward in his seat.
"She always called my phone from a payphone just outside the market. At two o'clock. But that last two days I've heard nothing."
"Where was she staying?"
"At a hotel on the outskirts of town, room 203. Self catering kind of deal."
"Right, Fish and Will. Go to that payphone and see if there's any sign there. I'm going to stay put see if she turns up here. Benny-"
"Go to the hotel. Got it."
The boys sprung into motion. Grabbing what they needed and heading for the truck they arrived in.
"Benny, I'll drop you off at the hotel." Santiago offered, earning a nod from Ben.
He followed closely behind Santiago. Still on the fence about whether he should give him an earful in the car of the way.
"She better be alright."
"I know. You're gonna kick my ass if she isn't."
"Damn right. But I know you didn't do this on purpose."
The ride was pretty quiet from then on. Both men itching to get to the hotel to confirm their hopes.
Benny couldn't help but scan everyone's face as they passed. Hoping she would just appear on a street corner unharmed.
Pulling up in the car park to the hotel. Benny was out the door even before Santiago could turn off the engine. Scanning the room numbers he headed for the stairs. Taking them two at a time, he followed the descending numbers. 213, 212, 211... Round the corner to the side of the block. He continued, 206, 205, 204... Pausing as he locked eyes on 203. Bracing himself for the worst he reached to twist the door handle, light pressure made the already opened door swing fully open.
Letting out a quiet whistle. Signalling to Santiago, Benny reached for the pistol he had stashed in the back of his trousers. With the curtains pulled the room was dim, when he didn't immediately spot you his guard remained on high alert. The room didn't look trashed. But it didn't exactly look neat and tidy. There was some semblance of disarray.
Benny recognised your belongings though. The notebook you always scribbled in. The snacks you never went anywhere without. He even recognised one of his boxing sweatshirts in the messy bed.
Relaxing his stance, Santiago took over scanning the rest of the room. Benny looked through the ripped up paperwork on the bed, seeing you'd made notes about the targets for him. Santi headed for the bathroom, to cover all bases.
"Benny get in here now!" Santiagos voice jolted Benny out of his thoughts.
Preparing himself to see something he didn't want to, he practically ran into the bathroom. Almost tripping over a crouching Santi. Who was hovering over your unconscious figure slumped in between the wall and the toilet bowl.
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Just As Good As I knew It Would Be
Pairing: Defender!Strange x SexWorker!Reader
Synopsis: It was supposed to be just another night with a new client, but Defender Strange was unlike any other and he definitely had other plans.
Word Count: 10k
Warnings: Descriptions of sex work, one or two use of the word 'whore', hickeys and lovebites, oral sex with male and female receiving, protected p n v sex.
A/N: This was planned to be a one shot, but I can easily see this story continuing, so it's up to you guys. Also, I was literary falling asleep over my laptop when I posted this so any typos or grammar errors I will fix tomorrow.
When the weight of his body left you and rolled to the side on the bed, you sighed in relief and also turned to the side, taking a cigarette from the package on the bedside table, lighting it and taking a long drag. It was still one o'clock in the morning and you had a client scheduled for 2:30 and before that you needed a long shower to get rid of all the sweat stuck to your skin.
He was a nice guy, plenty of money to spend since he paid for an hour with you almost every week. He was lonely and with the sweat problem you could understand why. You just couldn't remember his name. Andrew? No, Andrew was the one from last night. Nice guy, a little clingy but nice. Would it then be William? Fuck, it didn't matter anyway, you never called them by their names for that very reason.
Madam Elise always said that there was no other way to permanently lose a client than to call them by the wrong name. It's easier to call them all by the same pet name, she always says, and that's what you do. They were all Baby, for you. And they liked it very much.
"I would like you to stay the night with me." He murmured stroking your arm. "I like to think I'm more than just a client to you."
And didn't all of them like to think that way? You had to stop yourself from rolling your eyes and took another drag from your cigarette.
"You're too good for this job. I can give you the stability you need..."
"Okay, baby, let's get one thing straight once and for all." You interrupted him, putting out your cigarette in the ashtray and getting up. "I'm not interested in a relationship. Certainly not with one of my clients. And I don't need a man to save me from the life I live because, surprise! I like this life.”
He remained silent, watching as you got dressed and when you finished putting on your shoes he stood up, took out his wallet and took out a few hundred bills.
"Baby, I don't deal with money. I thought you had paid at the club."
He nodded "I did. This is extra."
You smirked, taking the money and putting it inside your bag. "You spoil me."
He smiled. "You deserve it, Y/n. When will we see each other again?"
"Madam Elise takes care of my schedule. But from what I know, it's full until next weekend."
He seemed extremely disappointed.
"But I'm sure she can fit you in some night for an extra fee."
"Money is not a problem." He stated cupping your cheek and threatening to kiss you, but you were quick to pull away from him.
"Then I'll see you next week. Take care."
"My driver will take you back to the club." He informed.
"Thanks, baby. Have a good night."
...
Madam Elise was busy taking care of the Absinthe's accounting after the doors closed. It was already past 3am and the girls were leaving. The night had been very profitable, everything had gone normally, without any mishaps and the girls seemed happy.
Throughout her life, Madam Elise worked at night and with her own effort founded the Absinthe Nightclub, which today has the status of the largest and most renowned nightclub in New York City. No less than 25 girls, 12 dancers, 3 singers, and an entire band worked for her, not counting the waiters, bartenders, security guards, secretaries, suppliers and everything else. It was a big business that she commanded with mastery and love.
However, that night, she was tired and could hardly wait to finally leave the place and go home. She was closing the register when Aline, her personal secretary who helps her take care of the girls' schedules, came to her excitedly.
"You won't believe who called asking for Y/n."
"Whoever it is, her schedule is full until the end of next week." Madam Elise answered nonchalantly, but Aline didn't seem any less excited and handed over a sheet of paper with a name and telephone number written on it.
"That's what I told him, but he didn't seem to mind waiting. He asked us to come back with an all-night date."
"A whole night?" Madam Elise asked surprised. "Does he know her price?"
"He mentioned that money is not a problem." Aline responded, smiling as if just talking to the man had already turned her his biggest fan.
"Why Y/n? Did he ask for her specifically or did you recommend her?"
Aline shook her head "He asked for her and only her. It must have been someone else’s recommendation."
"I highly doubt it." That was all Madam Elise responded to Aline's speculation. "Call him tomorrow, schedule him for the night."
Aline looked at her as if she had said the most absurd thing. "Should I reschedule everyone else? They won't be happy."
"No, but they will accept it. Y/n has already captivated them for life. Now a new client like this one..." She stared at the name scribbled on the sheet of paper. "This is a customer we still need to captivate."
Aline nodded, but continued standing there as if she wanted to ask or say something.
"What is it?" Madam Elise asked impatiently.
"Does madam think he will come here?"
"Don't be silly, of course not. A man like him has an image to maintain. She will go to him."
...
When you woke up the next day, the sun was coming in from behind the gaps in the heavy curtains in your room and it was already past 2PM. The routine of sleeping when it was almost dawn and waking up in the middle of the afternoon was the least rewarding part of the job, but it was something you had to get used to.
You had a very chaotic routine, but you couldn't think of another way to live. Your work has provided you with a beautiful apartment and all the luxury you could have dreamed of, and most importantly, freedom.
You didn't depend on anyone but yourself and contrary to what many might think, you didn't feel used. In fact most of the time you felt like a pop star, with men lining up to have a special appointment with you.
After taking a shower and spending a long time on skin care, you went down to have breakfast - which was actually always afternoon coffee - and took the opportunity to take a look at your schedule. There were two new customers you were excited to meet. One of them was a jazz singer, the other was a politician. A deputy, if you weren't mistaken.
"More coffee, ma'am?" Karen, your maid asked gently.
"Yes please."
Karen had been working for you for a little over a year. It was actually Madam Elise's idea for you to have someone to take care of the house and you, but you suspected that Karen also did a second job: spying on you for her. You would be eternally grateful for everything Madam Elise did for you, but sometimes the woman was too controlling and a little scary. Not that you cared, it wasn't like you had anything to hide.
"Karen, remind me again how you met Madame Elise." You asked, still looking through the names on your cell phone’s notepad and taking a bite of your toast.
"It's been so long, dear, I don't even remember exactly, but I think it was a few years a go when I worked at the nightclub" The old woman responded evasively.
"Hmm" You were sure the last time you asked she said they met each other at a job interview and not once she mentioned she worked at the Absinthe.
"Oh, I almost forgot it! Madam Elise called and asked you to call back as soon as you woke up. She said there were changes in your schedule for the night."
"No, come on! I was looking forward to meeting the deputy." You murmured, finishing your coffee and already calling her.
When you arrived at the Absinthe to get ready, it was already past 6PM and you still didn't know who the special client was that made Madam Elise cancel and reschedule everyone else. She refused to speak on the phone and emphasized that you should spend some extra time taking care of yourself because this client deserved the best.
So you took a bubble bath with some special bath salts, were extra careful with your skin care, using your best oils and creams. Your hair, which you had decided to leave loose and straight, you ended up wrapping in curlers and clips so that you could finish it when you arrived at the nightclub, as well as your makeup, which Madam Elise made a point of saying on the phone that she would do herself.
"I don't know why so much suspense." You said as she finished preparing your skin with foundation.
"You'll understand when you get there." She answered.
"How about this one?" Sofia, one of the new girls who worked with you asked, holding a hanger with a very short strapless red dress.
"No. Too much." Madam Elise replied.
"How about this other one?" Sofia asked showing off a long black dress with an extravagant slit.
"Too much, Sofia. What part of elegant and discreet don't you understand?" Madam Elise responded sharply.
"It would help if you say who the client is." Sofia complained.
"That's what I'm trying to find out." You said taking advantage of Sofia's complaint. "Oh, I got it, He is a rockstar, isn’t he? Don't tell me it's Bono!"
Sofia stared at Madam Elise, waiting for an answer.
“It's not Bono. And he's not a rockstar. He's better than that."
"How about this one?" Sofia showed off a rose midi dress that looked like something Kate Middleton would wear to one of her official events.
"Perfect!" Madame Elise exclaimed, finishing applying the third layer of mascara to your eyelashes.
"Please don't say it's the president. He's too old." You whimpered.
"Don't be silly, Y/n." That's all she replied.
"Older men make the best clients." Sofia reflected as she hung the dress on the chair next to you. "They are kind and don't usually last long. Not to mention they pay extras."
"Girl, You're learning fast!" You praised.
"Learning from the best." Sofia said giving you a wink and you two giggled.
"Perfect. Now let's let this hair down." Madam Elise said as she took the clips out of your hair and used a comb to straighten your curls. She finished with a setting spray and only then let you look in the mirror. The whole thing seemed too much to you, but you didnt say anything.
"Now finish getting dressed. A car is waiting for you outside. The driver knows where to drop you off."
"Yes ma'am."
Surprising you, Madam Elise leaned over and gave you a small kiss on the cheek in a rare display of affection.
"Good luck, my darling."
...
When the driver stopped in front of the old building, you couldn't help but think he had gotten the address wrong.
"Are you sure we're in the right place?"
"177A Bleecker Street. That's the exact address Madam Elise gave me. Do you want me to call her to check?"
You shook your head "No. It's okay. Thank you." You said, opening the door and getting out of the car.
"Should I pick you up in an hour?" He asked.
"No. He paid for the night." You informed, closing the door.
You walked up the steps slowly, somewhat intimidated by the oppressiveness of the place and trying to convince yourself that this was really happening, but when you approached the door, it opened on its own and you were overcome with the realization that you were about to spend the night with none other than Defender Strange himself.
As soon as you entered, the door closed behind you and you stood in the empty entrance hall somewhat disconcerted and not knowing what to do next. It took what seemed like an eternity until you were greeted by a baritone voice.
"Hello. I'm sorry, I was sure the woman I talked to this morning told me you would arrive at 9pm" He said going down the stairs and coming towards you. He was dressed exactly as you had seen him on TV or in the newspapers. Black and red robes, boots and hair tied in a ponytail, but gosh, the TV and newspapers didn't do justice to his beauty. Defined jaw, sharp cheekbones, plump lips and beautiful blue eyes. The man was gorgeous.
"I'm sure Madam Elise wouldn't get confused with my schedule. You must have spoken to Aline, her personal secretary." You said, feeling your cheeks turning red from the strange situation and also from the way he glared at you.
"Well, I have no reason to complain if her mistake gave me more time with you." He smirked, extending his hand for you to hold and bringing it to his lips. You knew that if it was any other man doing that you would roll your eyes at how cliché and ridiculous the gesture was, but with him all you could think about was how elegant and gentle he was. He just seemed so calm and kind.
"I'm sure you already know me, but let me formally introduce myself. Doctor Stephen Strange, or how my friends call me, Defender Strange, but you can call me Stephen."
You smiled "It's a pleasure to meet you, Stephen. I'm Y/n, but of course you already know that."
His smile widened "It's a pleasure to meet you in person, Y/n." He kept your hand in his. "Come, this is my house." He said gesturing ahead and taking you to the lounge and you found yourself analyzing every detail. The place was beautiful. It definitely wasn't to your taste, but it had a certain charm. Everything looked ancient, from the extravagant chandeliers to the reddish wooden furniture, everything seemed to have been there for many, many years.
"It's very nice." You said, still dazzled by every detail that was visible to you. The place was huge. "Do you live alone here?"
"Yes. I am the master of this Sanctum and therefore I live here. It is old and makes strange noises at night, but you learn to like it over time." He seemed to analyze your expressions carefully.
"But it must be lonely living alone in such a big place." You insisted, still amazed by the size of the place and you had only seen the foyer and the lounge.
Stephen smirked "It's rarely empty and work takes up most of my days, so I don't have time to feel lonely."
"Hmm."
"Please, sit. May I offer you something to drink?"
"Sure." You said, sitting on the beautiful victorian sofa.
"Wine? Maybe something stronger?"
"Wine is great."
He nodded. "Make yourself comfortable. I'll be back in a moment."
You did as he asked and as soon as he left, he returned with two glasses and a bottle of red wine which he opened and poured.
"I'm curious" You said, taking the glass he handed to you. "How do you know me? I mean, Madam Elise told me you asked for me specifically."
He smiled and took a long sip of wine.
"It's a long story. The short version is that a friend of mine told me about you."
"Is he a client?"
He chuckled, "I don't really know. I'm just glad he lead me to meet you."
You sipped the wine slowly, savoring the sweet on your tongue as much as you were savoring the enigmatic company of the man in front of you. However he downed the last of his wine and stood up.
"If you allow me, I need to finish a few things before I can dedicate myself entirely to you. Please, make yourself at home. Choose something for us to listen to, if you like music. I have a large collection. I'm sure something will please you."
With that he walked away, disappearing from sight and leaving you alone in the huge lounge.
You did what he suggested. You refilled your glass and ventured into the huge shelf of music in front of you, which to your surprise were not CDs but LPs. You got distracted reading the titles. He had a little bit of everything, from classical to pop music, including R&B and Hip Hop, classic rock and industrial metal and other things you didn't even know.
You opted for Bon Jovi and left it playing at a pleasant ambient volume and distracted yourself by scrolling through your Instagram feed for what seemed like a long time.
When he returned, he was no longer dressed in his sorcerer robes, but rather in dark jeans and a gray shirt. His hair, however, was still tied up in a ponytail and you found yourself thinking that any man in the world would look ridiculous with that hair, but not him.
"Bon Jovi. Good choice."
"A little cheesy, but I like it." You confessed. "I don't think I've ever met anyone who had so much physical music in the days of streaming services."
He chuckled. "Let's just say I'm old-fashioned. I'm not given to technology."
"No, just magic, I presume." You teased, getting up and approaching him, deciding to take the initiative. Men usually liked you to take the initiative, but with him you weren't too sure, but you had already waited too long and to be quite honest, you were eager to finally start the night.
"Are you going to show me some tonight?" You asked in your most seductive voice, and he let you snuggle into his arms and leaned his face against your hand when you touched him and finally, finally, he kissed you. A soft kiss, as if he was tasting a forbidden fruit, but you were eager to deepen the kiss, eager to finally claim him as one of your most valuable conquests.
His lips were thick and soft, his tongue tasted like wine and something else you couldn't identify and the touch of his beard on your face was delicious.
You couldn’t remember the last time you were this turned on by a kiss, but you could feel the slick between your legs. However, he pulled away gently when your hands threatened to unbutton his shirt.
"I can show you one or two things, but I'd like us to have dinner first." He said. "We don't need to rush, we have the whole night ahead of us."
But you had no intention of stopping now, not when your lips were finally on his mouth, down his chin and then his neck, nibbling his ear lobe. "I'm not hungry. Not for food at least." You whispered in his ear and watched him swallow thickly, but he grabbed your hand and pulled you away gently.
"I must insist."
You nodded a little confused, but let yourself be pulled into what soon turned out to be the dining room. The table was set and the food smelled wonderful. You hadn't really noticed that you were hungry until now, but it shouldn't have been a surprise since you had barely eaten all day.
He pulled out the chair for you to sit down and confessed. "I bought the food from my favorite Italian restaurant. I hope you don't mind. I would have cooked, but I didn't have time."
But he knew how to cook. Noted.
You smiled reassuringly, "It's great. It's more than I expected to be honest. Men don't usually serve me dinner. It's usually the other way around, you know?" You chuckled.
He poured your glass and his and then sat down too. "Men rarely know how to value what they have."
You felt your cheeks blushing and disguised it by taking a sip of wine.
"Well, they pay two thousand dollars for the hour." You said finally trying the food. "Wow, this is delicious."
He smiled satisfied and only them allowed himself to start eating too. "I'm not talking about money. For me, having the company of a woman, whether I paid for her or not, is always a privilege.
You stared at him and then gave in to your curiosity. "I wonder why a man like you needs to pay for a woman."
He didn't seem surprised or bothered by the question. He chewed slowly and swallowed, wiped his lips on his napkin and took a sip of his wine and then said simply. "I don't have to pay for women. But I had to pay to have the woman I wanted."
You felt your stomach fluttering at those words and something about the way he glanced at you and said it made you blush, and you smiled shyly. "I hope I'm worth it."
...
After dinner you convinced him to take you on a small tour of the house and your admiration for the place only increased with each new room that was presented to you.
"This is the library." He said, opening the two wooden doors and indicating for you to enter. He entered right behind you and waited in silence while you swept the place with your eyes.
It was ancient and beautiful, like you expected the library of an old castle or something to be like. So many shelves of books that went from floor to ceiling and small ladders supported on the shelves so that people could get books from higher places. There were also small desks scattered around the place and a larger one in the left corner with a large wooden and leather chair. Some books, paper and pen and a pair of reading glasses on top of it.
"It's my second favorite place in the house." He reported proudly, "It's also where I spend most of my time when I'm not on a mission."
You nodded, walking slowly down one of the corridors and trying to read the titles of the books. Most of them were written in other languages. "Which is the first?"
He smiled getting closer and when he spoke again his voice sounded dangerously close to your ear "I'll show you."
You felt your skin prickle and that didn't go unnoticed by him. He held your shoulders and got close enough for you to feel his body pressed against yours. His fingers slowly pulled the strap of your dress and only then did you notice a tremor in his hands, but before you could ask yourself what had happened to them, he started to place little kisses on your shoulder and little by little he raised them to your neck and you completely forgot what you were thinking.
The little kisses went up to your ear and he nibbled your earlobe and exhaled heavily as if he had been holding his breath for a long time and your body trembled with the sensation of his warm breath.
Without holding back, you turned to face him and pulled him into a kiss and your lips collided with a passion that surprised you. His tongue invaded your mouth and dominated yours easily and your fingers were quick to unbutton the buttons of his shirt, while his fingers unzipped your dress and the two of you desperately undressed without your mouths separating for even a second. Suddenly the idea of being apart from him seemed absurd and you were surprised by the overwhelming passion that took over you. It was as if the two of you were live wires that had finally touched and were now joined by an electric current of passion and lust.
When your dress was lying on the floor and your hands managed to free him from his pants and finally free his cock from his boxers, you pumped him a few times reveling in the realization that he was as big as you needed him to be. He rested his forehead on yours, closing his eyes and indulging in the touch of your hand and you cupped his face and pulled him back to your lips.
"I've waited for this for so long." He rasped in your lips, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you off the floor. You locked your legs around his waist, and he carried you to the largest desk and quickly finished undressing you, but made a point of keeping your high heels on.
He kicked his shoes away and did the same with his pants and boxers, leaving him gloriously naked for you and you watched in fascination as he moved his fingers and a condom materialized in thin air. He opened it quickly with his teeth and put it in with a certain desperation and finally entered you.
You both moaned at the sensation and you held yourself on to the edge of the desk as he thrusted against you with a certain desperation that was surprising and at the same time delicious. The sound of your bodies slamming against each other mixed with your moans and echoed through the empty library.
Your head fell back and he took the opportunity to bury his face between your breasts and took one nipple in his mouth and then another.
"Fuck..." You cursed out and then bit your lips to contain your moans, but they kept escaping as he fucked you so good and with so much passion and you suddenly noticed that you weren't forcing a positive reaction to please him. If anything, you were surprised with yourself, at how he was making you feel.
Your hand grabbed his hair and pulled him back to your lips and he kissed you passionately, thrusting his tongue into your mouth with the same desperation with which he thrusted his cock inside you. Fast, intense and delicious.
He broke the kiss only to run his lips down your neck and pushed you gently so that you lay down on the desk and pulled your hips closer to the edge and with a hand flat on your lower belly he returned to thrust into you and the variation of the position made him hit your g spot with calculous precision and your mouth went agape.
Men didn't usually find your g spot and didn't even bother trying, always desperate to achieve their own pleasure, but he was different, somehow he was different from everyone else.
"Stephen... You're going to make me cum."
You confessed surprise at how the knot seemed to tighten in your stomach. "Do you want me to cum, baby?"
He didn't respond, too involved in his own pleasure, but he put a hand between you touching your clit and rubbing his fingers there in slow circles and that was enough of an answer for you and your body responded to the stimulation quickly pulling you to the edge.
You came hard and he came soon after.
When he finished, he pulled you to meet his lips and something about the sweetness of that kiss made your heart flutter in your chest in a way you hadn't felt in a long time, but you were too caught up in all the sensations to pay attention to what they meant.
It was you who broke the kiss to breathe and he gently pulled out and quickly got rid of the dirty condom with a flick of his fingers and ran his hand through his hair, tucking the strands that came loose from the ponytail behind his ear and then smiled seeming a little embarrassed.
"This wasn't how I imagined." He said and upon noticing how that sentence could be interpreted in a wrong way he ran to explain "I thought I could get to the room. Give you a little comfort at least."
You stood up and approached him, cupping his cheek gently. "Believe me, you gave me something much better." You said letting out a small chuckle and pulling him back to your lips and something between his little moan and how his hand hold you closer to him made you feel like he was melting for you.
"Now will you show me your favorite place in the house?" You asked giving him your cutest smile and he nodded smiling.
"Anything you want."
The two of you got dressed in silence, but the silence wasn't awkward, in fact it was full of smiles and glances, and you found yourself thinking that you didn't remember the last time you felt like that, like you were on a real date rather than being with a client.
Either way, you pushed those thoughts to the back of your mind, remembering very well Madam Elise's words: No matter how incredible a client is, never forget they are just that: a client. Because they will never forget that you are a whore.
You sighed, letting the silly smile on your lips slowly die.
Stephen led you up the stairs and you walked behind him down a long hallway until you stopped in front of a large door, but before he opened it he turned to you and gently informed, "Many of the artifacts you will see in this room are magical and their value is immeasurable. I must ask you not to touch anything."
"Geez, I'm not that clumsy, Stephen." You defended yourself giving him your best smile.
"Please" He insisted.
"Okay, no touching." You promised, showing your hands to him and holding them behind your back dramatically. He smirked and then nodded opening the door and the two of you slowly entered. He snapped his fingers and the lights came on so you could actually look at the place.
It was a large and spacious room full of pedestals with vases and other objects on top, some were protected by glass, others were not. Everything seemed so old, from the heavy amber curtains and the gold and burgundy carpets to the cabinets and book shelves, the paintings on the walls and the ostentatious chandelier in the center of the ceiling. There was a fireplace surrounded by two loveseats and a fluffy dark brown rug. On the floor, next to the rug, there were some books and a forgotten tea cup.
But all of this was nothing compared to the beautiful round window that gave a beautiful view of Greenwich Village. "Wow, this is beautiful."
You approached the window to take a look outside where cars were rushing past. You had already seen that window from the outside, not to mention they sold postcards of the city with the front of the Sanctum Sanctorum printed on them, but being inside, observing the outside through that window was something else entirely.
"I usually come here when I need to think or just disconnect from my sorcerer problems." He explained, approaching you from behind and wrapping his arms around your waist. "This window is special, it allows me to see more of what is in front of me."
You raised an eyebrow "Is this some wizard code for something?"
He chuckled in your ear making your body tingle and then pointed to the window "This pattern is the seal of Vishanti, I don't expect you to know what it means, but it is very important and protects the Sanctum from various types of threats."
You nodded, looking at the intricate symbol in the window, but more precisely looking at him, so serious when he was talking about his work and so beautiful with that long hair, the gray strands just made him even more attractive and the beard, those cheekbones and the eyes...
"The window of worlds allows me to see other realities and dimensions. Some are pleasant to look at, benevolent so to speak, so you can easily get lost while watching them, others are dark and frightening, but it is my job to observe them and assure that everything remains in its natural state, without interference in our real world."
You smiled shyly admitting, "It's hard to combine the things you're explaining with the term real world. I live in the real world, this is… something else."
He let out a small laugh and then buried his nose in your hair and inhaled deeply, "You weren't real to me until tonight."
You turned to look at him "You talk about me like you know me."
He sighed, closing his eyes when your hand cupped his cheek, but before you could ask anything he pulled you to his lips and you felt your entire body shaking with that kiss, your heart pounding in your head as you gave in to the certainty that there was more than just sex involved tonight, even though you knew it was crazy, you couldn't help but feel that way. He was different, special and it wasn't because of who he was or the things he could do - magically speaking - but rather because of the way he could turn you into a puddle of goo with a look, a smile, a touch of his trembling hands and that kiss.
He was the one who broke the kiss first and before he could pull away, you pulled him to your lips again kissing him one more time. He smiled satisfied pulling away, but made sure to keep holding your hand and gently directed you to the rug next to the fireplace.
You watched him get rid of his shoes and did the same, letting your sore feet be caressed by the softness of the rug.
"I usually meditate here." He said, picking up the cup from the floor and disposing of it with a movement of his hand. "And I read. It helps keep me grounded. It's where I can have privacy, besides my room, of course."
You nodded, sitting on the carpet and reaching out to pick up one of the books, but he quickly took them out of your reach and returned them to the bookshelf.
"I'm surprised I can touch you, since everything here is sacred." You teased watching as he sat next to you, his hands automatically pulled you close and his fingers played with the strap of your dress pulling it down and placing little kisses on your shoulder. With his other hand he started to unzip your dress on your back and you felt your skin prickling.
"I am not sacred." He explained, searching for your lips and kissing you hungrily "Actually, I'm very human..." He continued kissing you, but his hands helped you get rid of the straps of your dress, letting it fall to your waist and undressing your breasts to him as he held one of them in his hand, pinching a nipple "...with human needs that I want you to satisfy."
You intertwined your fingers in his hair when his lips went down to your neck and he began to suck on your throat. He stopped and admired his work and then continued making sure the mark stayed.
"Y-you... can't..." You tried to warn him in vain when you finally noticed what he was doing, but he covered your lips with his index finger and continued until he was satisfied.
"What can't I do?" He asked with a cute smirk on his lips once he was satisfied with his work.
You swallow thickly feeling drunk, even though all you had drank that night was three glasses of wine.
"Mark me." You finally managed to say and his smirk turned into a grin.
"Too late for that, baby. Skin is very nice and soft, can't help it." And as if to prove what he was saying, he lightly bit the spot just below your ear and then sucked on the skin, eliciting a moan from your lips.
You couldn't tell what he had, but he managed to mess with you in a way that you couldn't understand, you could either think straight or formulate a coherent sentence while he had his lips on you. He made you melt, all your self-confidence and control seemed to melt before him.
"What's going on inside this pretty head of yours?" He asked, biting your chin and sticking his tongue in your mouth in another breathtaking kiss.
You hummed into his lips and tried to formulate a response when he finally broke the kiss.
"You. Right now, there is only you."
He smiled proudly, "Yeah? But there's another place I'd rather be at the moment."
You bit your bottom lip and waited for him to tell you.
"With my face between your legs." He rasped in your ear "Would you like that?"
God yes, please. But you just nodded letting yourself be manhandled as he laid you down on the fluffy rug and finished taking off your dress and panties. Your legs hung to the sides and he didn't wait to dive between them, lapping his tongue into your folds to make you even wetter than you already were.
He used his fingers to open your folds and licked your clit lightly with the tip of his tongue making your entire body tremble, your hands searched for something to grab and stopped in his hair, grabbing his ponytail, but you policed yourself to don't pull.
"Oh fuck... oh yes, yes..."
He hummed approvingly at your reaction and the vibration made your body shake. Without waiting any longer, he took your clit between his lips and began to suck slowly and then increasing the pressure and you saw stars.
You loved oral sex, but the men you had sex with never cared enough to waste time pleasuring you like this, after all they were paying a lot of money, it was understandable they preferred to receive rather than give, but Defender Strange was different from all of your other clients, he was actually taking pleasure in giving pleasure to you and he was wonderful. You couldn't remember the last time you had your clit sucked with such dexterity, if anyone had ever managed to reach that level of excellence, that is, and your clit suckers could only do so much and were nothing compared to the real thing and Stephen, oh god, Stephen was even better than the real thing. He was perfect.
You could feel the knot inside you threatening to break, your legs shaking under the grip of his hands and the next thing you knew you were tugging at his hair, the hair tie came loose in your hand and you finished getting rid of it letting his soft locks fall like a curtain of dark brown and gray.
Of course he could feel you were close, your body was shaking, your breathing was faster, your wet, neglected hole was clenching around nothing and your moans were getting louder and louder, but then he stopped, brought his hand down to his hair moving them away from his face and stared at you with those blue eyes and a satisfied smile on his lips that somehow took your breath away.
"Please... don't..." You could barely speak.
"I don't want you to cum yet." He confessed and then crawled on top of you "You're so delicious, you know that, right?"
You pulled him to your lips instead of responding. The taste of your cunt in his mouth was so obscene and so delicious that you couldn't control a moan. He chuckled between your lips letting you control the kiss for the first time that night. Your fingers tangled in his hair and you couldn't resist, you pulled just a little to see his reaction and to your surprise and delight he moaned, a loud and unmistakable moan.
When your lips parted, he glanced at you and you took the opportunity to caress his face, tracing the outline of his beard with your finger.
"You're so beautiful." You confessed "You're even more beautiful in person than on TV."
He let out a little giggle and you could see a light shade of pink fill his cheeks and you thought it was adorable.
He kissed your lips softly and held your chin between his thumb and forefinger "You're beautiful. You have the most beautiful pair of eyes I've ever seen and your smile... it does things to me."
You smiled shyly with the way he was glancing at you and then watched as he seemed to go somewhere else in his mind for a second but soon after he smiled back. "Where have you been all this time?" He asked.
You weren't sure what to say, so you just pulled him to your lips again and kissed him, feeling a strange sensation in your stomach. His lips moved down your chin and he touched your lips with his thumb, gently forcing them apart. You took his digit in your mouth and sucked on it, teasing him to which he smirked.
"I want your mouth now." He asked, taking his finger out of your mouth and replacing it with his tongue and kissed you hard.
You cupped his cheek and asked, "Tell me how you like it."
There were many things you could do with a man's cock in your mouth and you mastered that art masterfully, but with him you were insecure, you couldn't read him and while that was frustrating, it was also what made it all the most exciting.
"Do you ask this of all your clients?" He asked, looking genuinely curious.
You shook your head "No. Usually I know what they like right away, but you... you're different."
He seemed to like your answer. He rolled onto his side and lay on his back on the carpet. "You can start by undressing me and then you can take good care of me."
You sat down next to him and let your fingers run down his chest, playing with the buttons on his shirt.
"Do you like being taken care of?" You checked.
"Very much."
You unbuttoned his shirt, pulling the fabric aside and placing kisses on his chest, lowered your hand to his belt and bit your lip, noticing his hard on contained inside his pants. It twitched with the lightest of touches from your fingers and you couldn't help the proud smile on your lips. You moved to straddle his legs and unbuckled his belt and pants and with both hands you pulled down his pants and boxers, moving to take them off completely and throwing them in a pile on the floor.
You went back to straddling his legs and finally laid your eyes on his cock. You had felt him in your hands and felt him impaling you, but it was the first time you were looking directly at him and god, it was beautiful. The curvature that let it lean towards his stomach and the veins bulging around it combined with the fat, pink head made your mouth water. He was pulsing and leaking from the head and without holding back you bent down and licked the slit to collect the precum and it tasted so good. Salt and sweet at the same time.
"I can take care of you." You purred. "Just tell me exactly how you like it."
He bit his bottom lip to hold back a moan when you finally took him in your hand, holding him tight.
"Slowly. There's no need to gag on it, just take as much as you can. And I will love if you suck my balls, lightly, I'm very sensitive there."
You listened carefully. All you wanted was to please him.
"Can I make you cum in my mouth?"
"Fuck, yes" He replied and his cock twitched in your hand.
"But there will be another round for me, right?" You confirmed, smiling mischievously.
"As many as you want." He promised.
Your mouth was salivating to have him, but you started slowly, just giving little cat licks on the head and running your tongue down his entire length while your eyes remained fixed on his. If there was one thing that was certain about all men, it's that they love it when you suck their dicks while looking at them with big dull eyes. Defender Strange was no exception. He bit his lip to try to suppress a groan and his hands grabbed the fur on the rug.
You contained a giggle watching his reaction and continued with your work, lowering your tongue to the base and then taking one of his heavy balls in your mouth. You sucked slowly and then took the other one and repeated the same process while your hand moved up and down, slowly pumping him.
"Oh fuck, it's so good." He praised you and you felt that strange feeling in your stomach again, quickly realizing that you liked hearing him praising you and trying your best to have more of that.
You moved your lips up, placing small wet kisses along his entire length and stopped at his frenulum, licking it lightly with the tip of your tongue. For most men, the frenulum was the most sensitive part of their cocks and gave them the most pleasure when stimulated, however it used to be neglected most of the time by women, but you weren't like all women, you knew how to pleasure a man and there was nothing you wanted more than to pleasure Stephen. Not only that, you wanted to be the best he ever had.
You alternated the licks with light sucks on the delicate area and he began to writhe beneath you, moans began to escape his lips and you noticed how his baritone was even sexier in that context.
"Oh, right there, f-feels so good. J-just keep doing what you're doing with your tongue." He asked and you hummed satisfied, flicking your tongue in his frenulum and with one of your hands you began to massage his balls, giving them a light squeeze. With the other hand you continued pumping him at the base and he started to pulse in your hand and you knew that if you didn't reduce the stimulation he would cum before you even put him in your mouth, but you didn't care, you wanted to see him cumming like that, you wanted to prove to him that you were that good, so you increased the stimulation on his frenulum, changing the light licks for a more efficient suction while still using your tongue, but now not quickly, but like a kiss, slowly and with more passion.
"You're going to make me cum if you keep this up." He rasped bringing his hands to your head, but he didn't push or pull, he just grabbed your hair in a ponytail to move it away from your face and allow him to have a good view of what you were doing. Men were visual creatures.
"Do you want me to stop?" You asked, stopping to make sure, but he shook his head vehemently.
"Please, don't stop. Just keep working your tongue like that."
You did as he asked, but stopped pumping him and let his cock fall heavily onto his stomach, using only your mouth to stimulate him and your hand on his balls.
You licked, sucked, kissed his frenulum and started all over again until his grip on your hair got stronger, pulling at the roots and with a loud moan he came on his stomach.
"F-fuck yes. Oh shit... oh baby..."
You couldn't contain the smile on your lips when you saw him in that state, you were so proud of yourself, and you hadn’t even put him in your mouth. The man was so sensitive to touch, you wanted to ravish him so much.
You crawled on top of him and he cupped your cheek, still panting, but there was a wide smile on his lips.
"How did you do that?"
"I barely did anything. You are very sensitive."
He smirked, "Or maybe you're just too good with that tongue. No woman has ever made me cum like this." He confessed.
You felt your cheeks blushing and that was also an effect of him over you. You weren't shy, but when he looked at you like that and talked to you like that you felt yourself melting. Instead of saying anything, you kissed him softly, but then went down your lips to his neck, licking, biting, sucking on his pulse point and continued moving your lips down to his chest, taking one of his nipples in your mouth and sucking and pinching the other. He moaned softly and you felt him twitching in your stomach, his cum running down his sides, making your skin and his stick together and making a mess, but you couldn't care less.
He was soft now, but not completely and as soon as the stimulation on his nipples intensified he began to harden again for you. The man had a lot of stamina and you could only be grateful for that because you couldn’t wait to have him inside you again.
"R-ride me." His voice sounded shaky above your head. You brushed your hair away from your face to look at him and he cupped your face with both hands "Ride me, baby. Use me. Wanna see you getting off on my cock." He asked and you felt your heart pounding on your chest. You nodded and kissed him.
"Condom?" You asked, trying hard to reason. He moved his fingers and a condom materialized between his index finger and his middle finger and he handed it to you. With another movement of his fingers his shirt disappeared, and he was completely bare for you.
Opening the package, you took his lips in a hungry kiss and your hands went down to meet his cock, pumping him slowly, but with a firm grip on your hands, making him moan on your lips.
You dedicated yourself to putting the condom on him, but first you bent down to put him whole in your mouth. His hands automatically grabbed your hair as he hardened until it was rock hard in your mouth as you bobbed your head on his length, finally giving him the oral he deserved.
"S-such a delicious mouth. So f-fucking perfect... I knew you'd be so fucking good to me..."
You couldn't shake the thought that he spoke to you as if he knew you and that it wasn't just because a friend had recommended you to him, it seemed to be something more, but at the same time you also knew that something in him was awakening a different type of attraction and that you were probably only seeing things where nothing existed because you were too involved, so you tried hard to push away those thoughts and dedicated yourself to giving him the best blowjob, using your tongue the entire time, swirling it along his entire length while taking turns going up and down and using a little suction on his head. You knew it was going well because he continued praising you between moans that grew louder and louder, however he held your chin and gently took his cock out of your mouth.
"As incredible as this is, I really want to cum with my cock inside you this time." He explained. "And not before you."
You smiled nodding and finally – reluctantly - put on the condom. Part of you wanted to fuck him raw, but in your profession, that was never an option.
Moving to straddle him, you directed his cock at your entrance which was dripping wet and let yourself sink into him feeling him stretch you deliciously.
You had seen dicks of all sizes and learned to get the best out of each one, but you couldn't be a hypocrite or lie and say that size doesn't matter. Yes, it matters a lot, and you were so grateful that Defender Strange was this big, providing you with the perfect amount of stretch and with that perfect curvature that found your g spot with surprising ease. All you had to do was lean forward a little, resting both hands on his chest and that was it.
"Oh y-yes baby... right there."
Stephen groaned in satisfaction, both of his hands grabbed and squeezed the fat of your waist, his eyes fixed on yours the entire time.
"Hit that sweet special spot uh? I can feel it. Feels so good, so fucking warm and wet... shit... squeezing me so tight."
You bit your lip, moving your hips up and down, turning it sensually every time you went down, letting his pelvic bone and hair massage your clit, providing shocks of pleasure that felt like electric currents running through your entire body.
"I love seeing you riding me like this, so fucking gorgeous" He purred "Come on, baby, need more, fuck me harder."
You increased the pace until you were both panting, the sensuality giving way to the tireless search for your release that you knew wasn't too far away. You couldn't help it, he was so perfect, everything about him exuded sex, the looks, the moans, the dirty words of submission taking you to the limit and at the same time making you hold on to the edge because you didn't want it to end, you wanted to let that continue forever.
However, he seemed to understand that you were stalling because he wrapped his arm around your waist and sat down leaving the two of you in a lotus position and began to move you faster on top of him, thrusting his hips against you to increase the intensity of the thrusts.
Getting carried away by all the sensations and feeling the knot threatening to break, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and grabbed a handful of his hair tugging at it with more force than you should have while the movements of your hips on top of him became faster and more desperate.
"Do it again." He urged in your ear, his baritone little more than a whisper.
You pulled his hair again, even harder this time and his head fell back and you felt his cock throb inside you. A part of you loved that and without him asking you did it again and again and took advantage of the fact that his neck was on display for you and started sucking it hard, biting it and sucking again until it left a purple mark. Satisfied, you grabbed his chin and pulled him to your lips, sticking your tongue in his mouth and being surprised by the way he let himself be dominated and when he let out a sweet moan in your mouth and his dick throbbed again Inside you, you knew he had reached his limit.
You sunk your teeth into his shoulder, feeling the wave of pleasure and euphoria wash over you as the knot broke and you came hard on his cock and with a loud, animalistic groan he came soon after, his cock pulsing and spilling into the condom. God, how you wish it were your walls that he was painting white.
That thought alone should have been enough for you to question your sudden involvement with that man, but at that moment you didn't want to reason, you just wanted to feel.
...
You were still lying on the rug, staring at the ceiling in silence and immersed in your own thoughts. Although your head was still spinning, your breathing had finally returned to normal, and the reason seemed to be coming back to you because you were suddenly too self-aware of everything that had happened that night.
Stephen had left you for a few minutes and you could hear him cleaning himself in the bathroom. You should also get up and get dressed, but your legs felt like jelly and you couldn't find the will within you to do so.
When he came back and laid back down next to you he was dressed in gray sweatpants and his hair had been pulled back into a ponytail.
"Don't you think sex is a weird thing?" You said, verbalizing the confused thoughts in your head. "I mean, you say things you would never say if you weren't aroused, you do things you can't imagine doing under any other circumstances."
He smiled thinking for a second. "I think it's called intimacy."
"Yes and no. Personally, I think intimacy is different. It's when you feel free to continue talking after sex is over and how you feel about it."
"Like now?" He asked.
You didn't respond, instead you sat down and faced the fireplace.
"I have a list of things I don't do or don't let people do to me." You admitted it.
"What for example?"
"Hickeys" You replied holding back a smile "As you can imagine it's not smart of me to arrive at the appointment with my client marked by the previous client."
"And why do I think you weren't reluctant enough when you realized what I was doing?"
"Because I wasn't." You sighed. "I also don't usually kiss my clients. I mean, it's not a rule, but I avoid it if possible. It makes me uncomfortable."
He sat down, seeming to watch you closely, but didn't say anything.
"Talking about personal things, like I'm doing now, is also on my list." You hugged your legs and rested your chin on your knee giving him an apologetic smile. "You left me disconcerted."
He smiled touching your knee and with his other hand he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear and then caressed your cheek.
"I'm not usually like this with other women. Although I enjoy it, I rarely let myself be in a position where I'm not in control. I think it's safe to say that we both did things tonight that we don't usually do, and I don't know about you, but I really liked it and I really hope you liked it."
You sighed, feeling that strange feeling in your stomach again. "That's the problem, Stephen. You shouldn't care what I like or don't like."
"But I care." He replied chuckling dryly. "Is it really that bad that I care?"
You shook your head trying to think straight. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have started this conversation."
"You can tell me whatever you want." He said moving to kiss you, but then stopped and decided to confirm, "Is it okay to keep kissing you?"
"I don't know." You admitted with a sigh, but surrendered and threw yourself into his arms anyway.
He let out a small giggle when your lips collided, but then he took control of the kiss, kissing you like that was the only thing that mattered to him and god, he was such a good kisser. One of the reasons you hated kissing your clients was because they were terrible kissers and also because you thought it was too intimate. But with Defender Strange neither of those things applied.
When he finally got tired of your lips, he stood up and held out his hand for you to do the same. "Come on, let's go to bed."
Reblog please! Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing!
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Sunshine On My Shoulders | Josh Kiszka x Reader
Warnings: SMUT!!! MINORS DNI! Josh being an asshole sorry, mentions of fearing thunderstorms, smoking the herb, fluff and angst..(if I missed any let me know)
Word Count: 11k+ get cozy friends
A/N: Hello. Hi. It has been SO long since I have had the motivation to sit down and write a fic but I wanted to share this little piece with you all. Who doesn't love a good friends to lovers trope with some spice in the mix? Go easy on me though, like I said it's been a little while since I have posted anything like this and it is so terribly edited…
Huge shoutout to @streamingcolors-gvf and @myfriendtheghost. Without either of you, I don't think this would have made it out of the dusty drafts in my google docs. I appreciate you both so very much.
Enjoy.
******************************************************************
The squeaky wheels of the shopping cart you were pushing were beginning to annoy you. The dull beep of items being scanned tuned out in your ears as a white noise to the god awful rattle of this stupid cart you had. How did you always manage to get the one cart with the broken wheel every time you went to the store? You hate grocery shopping. Too much noise, too many people all scrambling around to load up carts with fresh produce and frozen dinners for their families, and the gaudy white lights, ugh! You figured since you loved people watching so much you would enjoy being nosey and stare into people's carts to see what they had, I mean you may have missed something good back in the bakery aisle for all you knew. But you hated being here. You would rather instacart your groceries, or have curbside pick up than to venture into a store if you didn't have to.
But today was a last minute circumstance. A last minute circumstance for your best friend Josh. He had called you in a panic from a hotel room many states away a few days ago informing you that he had re hurt his already busted eardrum, and he had hurt it badly this time. Bad enough that he was coming home sooner than anticipated.He expressed to you over facetime how he felt he was helpless to take care of himself at times and for once, did not want to be left alone. So, he had asked you a favor. Deeming it the biggest favor he would ever ask of you and that he would pay you back at a later date to which you insisted against since it is what friends do for each other. Josh had asked you to come spend a few days with him so he could get settled back in at home. He had requested that you went to pick up some food for him on top of his medications that he needed to take for his ear. He had told you everything over the phone while you stood in your apartment and you tried your best to write everything down while he was rattling off specific ingredients for certain recipes. You had offered to make him his favorite soup for him that he had been complaining he missed so much these last few weeks on the road. He had swore it could cure all pain in an instant and you were determined to make it for him.
You two were going to be staying in the boy's vacation home, a nice little cabin in the hills of Tennessee so he could ‘get away from Jake and his amps’ for a while and immerse himself in nature. You of course happily obliged to his every request. Secretly pining on him for months now, you'd take any chance to spend time with him while he was home.
So this is how you ended up where you currently were, one of your least favorite places on the face of the planet earth. But if it was for him, you'd suck it up any day of the week.
With your car full of grocery bags and a packed duffle bag you began your trek to the hills of Tennessee outside of the bustling city of Nashville that you have been able to call home for the last couple of years. The drive was peaceful. You had made it a few times before after having the pleasure of being invited to a small weekend getaway with the boys and their lovers. Many memories were made in that cabin with your friends.
Pulling down the little dirt road that led to the cabin you weren't sure if you were giddy with excitement or if it was your brain trying its best to cover up your anxiousness. You were going to be spending the next few days with Josh alone. You've never had the chance to spend one on one time without Josh's brothers hanging out nearby or even just other people in general hanging around.
Seeing the cabin coming into view through the trees you saw Josh's Jeep already parked out front. “Hey Siri? Call Josh.” Even with the cabin being tucked away in the woods you were thankful cell service was still decently strong.
The phone rang a few times over the speakers in your car, “Hello?”
“Hey! I have arrived!” You announced as you put your car into park.
“Okay, the front door is unlocked. Need any help?”
“I got it Josh, dont worry about it!” You reached over your front seat to grab your purse and water bottle, preparing yourself to load up your arms with groceries and such.
“Okay, see you soon Sunny.”
Sunny..
Josh had given you the nickname Sunshine shortly after you two met and it had been shortened to Sunny after a while. He had told you that you reminded him of the warm sun on the first day of spring after the weather broke from a cold winter. That you lit up a room so effortlessly when you were around and had the ability to make everyone around you happy. And that's when you knew that you were in trouble. Your heart belonged to him but it felt so unrequited at times. His little touches he would graze over your skin when he thought no one was looking, the winks he would shoot your direction after he made a joke that caused you to laugh wildly, the blush you could swear would paint his cheeks when you would make flirty remarks..
And yet, whenever you felt like the line between friends would be crossed, he would pull away. The touches would become more sparse and you noticed he wouldn't look in your direction as often as he used to. But then he would jump right back in a few days later as if nothing happened. As if his cold behavior was just a minor occurrence. It confused you wildly. So you settled for pining after him and keeping him as close as he could be to you, as friends. As long as he was in your life, you didn't care.
You gathered up the grocery bags along your arms, clearly hurting yourself slightly in the process but you'll be damned if you had to make another trip. Unfortunately for you, you had abandoned your duffel bag back in the car and only realized it as you were pushing the front door of the house open. Josh had been spread out on the couch, writing furiously away in his journal as he had finally been able to put some finishing touches on the lyrics to a new song when he heard you. He saw you through the little archway in between the foyer, kitchen and living room.
“Sunny!” He beamed. “Oh my gosh, hang on, let me help you!”
Your arms were beginning to weaken at the heaviness of the bags but you shook your head wildly as he came bounding towards you.
‘You will do no such thing mister! Go sit back down!”
You tried to pull away from Josh's fingers grasping at the handles of the bags leaving red marks on your arms but didn't succeed as he pulled a few of them away from you.
“Sunny, don't be so stubborn, I feel okay right now!” He smiled widely at you, his dimple making an appearance on his cheek. You tried not to stare as you felt yourself redden in the face. Had you forgotten how he was so cute while he was away? How is it even possible that he came home more attractive..
You walked with him the short distance to the kitchen and after unloading the bags from your arms Josh walked towards you and gave you a side hug. “Thanks again for doing this for me Sunny.”
“Of course.” You smiled up at him.
“Did you hear about the storms that are supposed to happen tonight?” He asked, back turned towards you while you both started unloading the groceries.
“I did, yes! Are you prepared? I heard the wind might be bad and the power will go out because of that.”
Josh stopped and threw a cheeky smile over his shoulder at you. “And who said the power was going to go out?”
“Me! This cabin is in the middle of nowhere, I will give you $100 if the power does not go out.”
“Deal Sunny!” He smirked.
His smirk quickly diminished on his face as he felt a pain radiating through his ear to his jaw, you watched as he winced slightly.
“You okay?” You softly asked.
“Yeah..I mean, no. But it's okay.”
Josh turned his attention back towards the grocery bags and you. You were beating yourself up mentally for not really being able to carry on or start a conversation with him now that you two were alone together. There was easily so much you two could talk about right now. You were trying to rack your brain on whether or not you wanted to ask him about tour so soon because it was such a touchy subject right now. Or even bring up the state of his ear, deciding against that as well as it might add insult to injury. Just as you were about to ask him how his trip home was, Josh broke the silence in the room.
“Chicken broth?”
“Huh?” You responded.
“You got chicken broth?” Josh raised his voice slightly at you causing you to shrink back. Your eyes go wide at his tone of voice.
“I…- Josh..was I not supposed-...” You started rambling. Shocked at how he was speaking to you.
“Why the fuck would you get chicken broth for a vegetarian soup?!” You watched as he pinched the bridge of his nose and spun around. Your heart sank and started to quicken in your chest as your brain tried to comprehend how Josh's voice and attitude towards you changed at the flip of a switch. I mean you just got here..
He's never ever used that voice with you before with you and now..your arms began to stiffen at the rush of adrenaline coursing through your veins and you started to ramble.
“Josh I- I don't know why I didn't think of-”
“Of course you didn't think. I mean why would that make any sense!” He snapped, still facing away from you in the kitchen.
“I'm sorry. I don't know why I-..”
“Just..-stop..now we can't have the soup. The one thing you knew I was looking forward to for the last few days. You think I can have chicken broth?! Useless..” Josh whispered the last part.
Your heart sank heavy in your chest. You had positively ruined the one thing Josh asked you to do for him. Your head had snapped up to look at him at his last word he chose to mutter out, only to see his eyes wide already looking at you. You felt like the two of you were standing there for hours, neither of you making a move. He watched as your eyes began to fill with tears and your face turned red.
You snatched your keys off the counter just as the first shaky breath of what felt like a panic attack coming on made its way through your chest.
You had to go, you had to get out of this house before he saw you break down. You couldn't let him see you like this.
You hastily slipped on your shoes not caring if you even put them on the correct foot and pushed the front door of the house open making haste to your car in the driveway. All the while you could hear Josh repeatedly calling out your name from behind you trying to stop you. It wasn't until he had successfully grabbed your arm while you were trying to get into the front seat of your car did you stop. By now you had tears spilling down your cheeks and you refused to look directly at him.
“Y/N please, Y/N I'm sorry I didn't mean it-..” He pleaded with you, grip strong on your left arm.
“Josh, please let me go.” you let out a shaky breath, closing your eyes causing more tears to rush down your cheeks.
“No,” He paused to wipe a stray tear falling down your cheek. “No, I'm not letting you go. I'm sorry Y/N I didn't mean what I said back there. I need you here, with me, please.”
“But why did you say all that..why did you talk to me like that.” You let out a shaky breath, looking down at your feet.
“Y/N I promise I didn't mean it, I've been irritated with other things and I kind of took it out on you and I shouldn't have. Not that that is a good excuse to say anything like that to you. I-I'm sorry.”
Josh's chest was rapidly rising and falling as he was looking at you. “Please please stay. I didn't mean it.”
You pushed him away from you.
“You don't think I know that!” You yelled at him.
You watched his face turn white as you connected your now bloodshot eyes with his own.
“Josh, you don't think I know half of the shit that you've been going through?! We talk almost every single day! I know how you haven't been feeling good and for crying out loud and I know this set back on tour is a lot to handle.I come here to help you out because you asked me to and because you're my best friend and you yell at me and call me useless right after I walk through your front door? Useless?! Seriously get fucked.” You turned away from him again grabbing your car door handle only for his arm to reach past your shoulder and shove it closed.
“Y/N, please..!”
“Josh, let me fucking GO!”
He held his arm steady against the crease of the car door and you snapped your eyes at his face and glared at him the best you could. You hoped that your piercing glare would get the message across. You watched as he drew his lips together in a tight line and rubbed his nose against his white sleeve before looking back at you. You crossed your arms and continued to glare at him.
Just as he was about to begin speaking to you again you clicked the little red button on your key fob and the car alarm started blaring. You lifted your chin at him in defiance.
You watched as his face dropped, as if you could read his face saying ‘really?’.
He rolled his eyes. “Y/N. Seriously?”
“Yes seriously. Get off my car you fucking criminal.”
“Criminal?” He glared at you.
“Yes criminal! You're holding me hostage!”
He giggled, arm still perched against your car door, alarm still blaring.
“You know there's 3 other doors you can crawl into this vehicle through. I'm not doing anything.” You watched as the corners of his mouth were fighting off a smile, his eyes gave it away though how funny you were to him which only fueled the anger you felt.
“Fuck you Joshua!”
Your anger intensified even more as he laughed out loud. “I'm just saying Sunny! You're more than capable of getting into your vehicle right now!”
“You're so annoying!”
“Oh yeah? What else?” His stupid smirk was beginning to break through your tough barrier without you even realizing it.
“You're an asshole! A prick! The worst person I've positively ever met in my entire life!”
“Wow, Sunny. I never thought I'd see your true colors!” He finally threw a full smile in your direction which quickly fell as he watched your eyes narrow even further at him.
You turned your back to him then. Car alarm still going off.
You heard him sigh. “Y/N? Sunny? I'm sorry I yelled at you and said you were useless. That was totally out of line for me and I don't know why I even said it in the first place because you are the best thing that has happened to me in a very long time. I don't think I would be able to survive without you to be honest. I'd probably be stuck on the side of the road somewhere like a lost puppy if it weren't for you keeping me in check and taking such good care of me. Will you please forgive me for the horrid, horrid comment I made in the kitchen? Let me make it up to you.”
You didnt turn back to face him, but you clicked that little red button on your key fob and your car went quiet. You heard him let out a breath behind you. You began tapping your foot against the gravel. Were you really about to forgive this asshole? Probably. I mean he was right that he wouldn't be able to survive without you..and his stupid cute face, his smile and those dimples were your ultimate kryptonite..
“Fine Joshua. I will stay, but understand you have some major, major groveling to do.”
You turned back to face him and Josh whisked you into his arms faster than you could blink.
You felt his arms wrap around you and a hand immediately finding its place on the back of your head holding you tight like you were going to slip away at any moment. Your arms did not reciprocate, only loosely wrapping around his torso as he clung to you like his life depended upon it.
The sadness in your chest had dissipated. Not into comfort, warmth, or happiness. The anger stuck.
“Josh, why would you even say something like that to me in the first place though?” You pulled your head away from his grasp to look at him directly. You could see the remorse still painted clearly across his face. Just as he was about to open his mouth and respond, the sound of tires crunching on gravel cut you both short.
Josh sighed and looked between you and the car that was approaching. “My mom is here.”
He dropped his arms from around you and you watched as he opened your back seat door and grabbed your duffle bag, slinging it over his right shoulder.
“Hey kids!” Karen greeted you both with a wide smile stepping out of her car. “What's up!”
Both you and Josh put up appearances as if, whatever it was, didn't just happen between you two.
“Hey mama!” Josh walked around the front of the car to give his mom a big hug.
“Hey Mrs. Kiszka” You waved at her with a small smile.
“Did you just get here honey? I hope I wasn't interrupting anything.” She shot a wink at Josh, which to his luck, you had missed but his cheeks now sported a light pink color.
“Yeah, I was just helping her unload her things ma.”
“Oh perfect, then you can grab these bags from my car too!” She opened the back seat of her car. “I stopped to pick up some groceries for you since I know you've been on tour for so long, figured I'd help restock the fridge.”
Josh whispered a soft thank you. Neither of you made a move to mention that you had just gone grocery shopping for him not a few hours ago.
“Let me help too Mrs.Kiszka.” You smiled and held an open arm for her to place grocery bags into.
“Thank you sweetheart!”
*****************************************************************
You, Josh and Karen had successfully brought all 6 grocery bags into the house without an issue setting them onto the counter next to where the already more than empty grocery bags from your trip now sat.
“Oh! I didn't realize that you had already done some grocery shopping sweetie!” Karen said, beginning to unload fresh carrots from a brown paper bag.
Josh cleared his throat and glanced across the kitchen island at you, giving you a small smile. “Yeah, Y/N here was generous enough to go for me today. She even picked up my medicine that I needed since I still cannot really drive due to random bouts of vertigo.”
“Ohh how sweet of you Y/N” Karen said. “Thank you for taking such good care of Joshua for me. He always speaks highly of you and I can see why.”
“You're welcome Mrs.Kiszka, of course” You smiled at her sheepishly, your cheeks now sporting a red hue.
You had only met Karen a few times and had a few brief conversations with her. For some reason she made you nervous. I guess that's what happens when you are crushing on somebody's son who loves their mother more than anything. You constantly hope for approval from them.
You were blissfully unaware that Josh was watching your every move. He found it endearing how nervous you got around his mother, how you fidgeted with your fingers and blushed furiously.
“Joshua, stop staring and help me unpack these groceries?” Karen smirked in his direction.
You watched as Josh's face now matched yours in color.
Was he really just staring at you? What the fuck?
You were in the middle of unpacking eggs from the bottom of a brown paper bag when Josh dropped an item onto the floor. “Fuck.” He murmured.
He bent down to pick it up just as you snapped your eyes in his direction. You watched as he locked eyes with you and set the container of vegetable broth back on the counter as Karen was behind you clearing out space in the fridge.
“Joshua Michael, you have moldy fruit in here..”
Josh's eyes snapped behind you to look at his mom while she was scolding him.
You were focused on the container of veggie broth sitting on the kitchen counter now, almost taunting you.
You felt overwhelmed all of a sudden and you hastily finished clearing out the bag in front of you. “I'm going to excuse myself to take a shower if you two don't mind. I feel a little gross after running around all of Nashville today.”
“Of course sweetie!” Karen said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and giving you a light squeeze. You smiled at her and leaned into the side hug. Karen gave the best hugs.
Josh nodded at you. “Upstairs and straight back in the hallway is the bathroom. There should be fresh towels. If they're not out, the third cabinet on the left should have some fresh towels.”
“Thanks.”
Josh gave you a small smile and reached to grab the moldy blueberry container that Karen had begun waving around again.
****************************************************************
The hot water pouring from the shower head felt divine against your sore muscles. You took your time scrubbing, exfoliating, standing underneath the hot stream of water and letting the water cascade down your face or your back. You weren't in a rush to get out of the shower. Not when it felt this good, and not when you were trying to avoid being downstairs again. You were still upset that Josh had even spoken to you in such a way over something as small as Chicken broth. But as you mulled it over in the water some more, you couldn't really believe yourself but you started to empathize with his little outburst due to the recent events and you still felt slightly guilty that you couldn't deliver the one thing he kept bringing up over and over again the last few days. Almost as if the universe had a vendetta against you, you felt the hot water turn lukewarm and then almost ice cold instantly as the water reserve from the hot water tank drained in its entirety.
You let out a groan as you realized your time in the shower had now come to an end unfortunately.
You grabbed the white fluffy towels sitting on the counter next to you and wrapped your body up, trying to warm back up as the water had really put a damper on your skin temp. Thankfully, you had remembered to grab your duffle bag from the bottom of the staircase where Josh had left it before you came upstairs.
Putting on your favorite comfy clothes and taking the time to do your after shower routine, you realized you really couldn't stay upstairs much longer.
Opening the bathroom door, the smell of spices and comfort food filled your senses. It had been a long time since you had a good home cooked meal and your tummy grumbled loud to remind you of such.The frozen dinners and the take out during the week had turned into an often occurrence for you when you were in a pinch. And it felt like you were in a pinch very often these days.
You were about to start descending down the stairs when you caught hushed voices coming from the kitchen.
“...I was so mean to her mama, I really messed up.” You heard Josh plead.
“You know Josh,” You heard Karen hush back. “That girl cares about you. A lot. I can see that very clearly from the few times that I have spent with all of you. You are my son yes but you know I don't sugar coat shit. I am surprised she even stayed.”
“Me too.”
“You will have some making up to do no doubt. But I think you are off to a great start here.”
While you were doing your best to go unnoticed by the two in the kitchen, you hadn't realized the banister you were leaning against at the top of the stairs wasn't the steadiest unfortunately. Just your luck, one of the screws had popped out of the wall that was holding said banister up and rolled quite loudly down the wooden steps until it made it to the bottom of the staircase.
You rushed down after it, beat red in the face. Picking it up you looked up and made eye contact with Josh and Karen who were both trying hard not to laugh.
“Im sooo sorry Josh! I didnt mean to break-..”
Josh held his hand up, “Let me guess, top screw from the banister. That fucking thing will never stay in the wall.” He shook his head and made his way over to you. He touched your elbow as you put the screw into his extended hand and you two held each others gaze for a brief moment before you broke away from his touch.
“Well you two, I am out of here.” Karen said, grabbing her purse from the counter.
“You're not staying for dinner mama?” Josh asked, eyebrows furrowed.
“I do have other children, Joshua. Plus, I promised Jacob I would spend the night at his house since Jita is out of town currently. You're in good hands here anyways.” She shot a wink in your direction.
You flushed and watched as her and Josh shared an embrace before she approached you.
“If you need anything honey, my phone number is on the fridge.” She pulled you into her embrace and you two squeezed each other.
“Don't let him get into too much trouble now.” She whispered.
“And you two stay safe! Joshua if anything happens I'm a call away.” She said as she approached the front door.
“Thank you mama!”
“Thanks Mrs.Kiszka”
“You two behave yourselves!” She winked at you both as the front door shut.
“Hi” Josh smiled at you sheepishly.
“Hey.” You responded.
“I made my famous pasta dish if you're hungry.” He gestured behind him.
“I thought I was supposed to be making dinner for you tonight.” Your eyebrows furrowed as you made your way to the barstool directly across from him. “Also, was I in the shower that long?”
He laughed and turned around to spoon contents from the pan on the stove into a white bowl.
“Not terribly long, no. Also, I cannot promise this is the best thing you will ever eat but,” He set a bowl in front of you. “Consider this an apology?”
“Not the best thing? Josh, I thought this was your ‘famous pasta dish’!” You grinned at him.
“Oh shove it!” He matched your smile.
You brought a forkful of the hot contents up to your mouth enjoying the flavors of the sauce and the herbs mixing together in perfect harmony. It was easily one of the best things you have tasted in awhile. “I accept your apology, I think.”
******************************************************************
Not a few hours later you sat with bellies full of pasta, wine and the two of you were now picking at Josh’s version of a desert charcuterie board which consisted of graham crackers, fruit, marshmallows and chocolates that he scoured his cabinets for, minus the blueberries of course.
There was a comfortable silence between the two of you, John Denver’s voice filling the background. All that happened earlier was forgiven through bouts of shared laughter and talking through shared memories you had made together, and listening to the stories from the tour. The good ones only of course.
The first few notes of Sunshine on my Shoulders began to play through the speakers of the record player.
“Dance with me Sunny?” Josh asked, extending a hand out to you. “I know this is one of your favorite songs.”
You took his hand and watched as he gave you his signature wide smile that was only ever reserved for when he seemed to be truly happy. Josh pulled you softly into his arms, one hand laid on your lower back, the other holding your left hand. Your right arm comfortably lay underneath his left, feeling the strength of his back muscles through his yellow jacket he was sporting. You allowed yourself to truck your head into the crook of his neck, his smell consuming your senses. You could feel his steady heartbeat on the tip of your nose as you two swayed slowly in the kitchen.
If I had a day that I could give you
I'd give to you a day just like today
If I had a song that I could sing for you
I'd sing a song to make you feel this way
Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Your heart almost stopped in your chest at the sound of him beginning to sing softly along with the lyrics. Only a few hours ago you were mad at him and now those feelings of frustration have been whisked away with the sound of his soft voice.
Fuck you wanted this man so bad. And who knows, maybe he did have feelings for you too. I mean, who else would just wrap someone up, swaying in a kitchen after drinking wine and enjoying a nice meal like that. But then again, you thought of what everyone who was close with Josh would say at dinner parties or late nights out at the bars.
“Josh doesn’t date. Don’t get your hopes up”
“Josh is picky about girls.”
“Josh is good at stringing girls along and breaking their hearts, I’ve seen it! It’s true! He gets close to these girls, takes them on a few dates or has them over and then never talks to them again.”
“He’s not called the heartbreaker for nothing.”
You were no longer focusing on the song or Josh's soft humming, more on the intoxicating feeling of him, the smell of him and the thought that he could rip your heart to shreds in an instant. Everything about Josh invited you in and kept a strong hold on your heart. You felt the pang of sadness course through your heart at the thought that you could probably never have this man in your life the way you wanted. You would never be able to experience the feeling of being swept up in his arms after a long day. The feeling of his lips across your skin. How he looked in the morning all curled up in his bed right here at home.
Your body must have stiffened slightly in Josh's arms and of course he noticed the change immediately.
“Sunny? Everything okay?” He asked, pulling back away from you a bit to look down at your face.
“Huh?” You tried to play it off. “Oh, yeah, yes, I just…have a bit of a headache coming on. Too much wine probably.”
You knew he knew it was a lie, you could see it clear as day on his face. You two each only had maybe 3 glasses and this man has watched you pound tequila sodas and shots and still be able to function almost completely fine. But for some reason he didn’t press you for a further explanation.
“Want some tylenol?” He asked, disconnecting your bodies from one another. His hands rested softly in the bottoms of your elbows.
You shrugged, “Sure. I might head to bed though. These headaches can end up being bad if I don’t get horizontal soon.”
He nodded and gave you a sad smile. “I get it, trust me. Let me grab some water for you too.”
You felt the tension in the room peak at an all time high for the first time tonight as you watched Josh float around his kitchen grabbing a glass, filling it up and emptying two pills into the palm of his hand. You graciously took the items from him.
You watched as Josh began to clean up the items in the kitchen before placing the now empty glass of water into the sink where Josh was currently scrubbing away at a pot.
“Goodnight Josh.” You bumped his shoulder awkwardly.
“Sleep well Sunny.” He bumped yours back.
You wrapped your arms around your torso almost in a protective manner, or almost as if you were cold and began to make your way up the staircase. You stopped at the 4th step and turned around. “Hey Josh?”
A smile spread on your face as you watched just his head poke out from behind the kitchen wall. “Yeah?”
“Thank you. For dinner, a-and for letting me stay here with you.”
He gave you a smile, “Of course Y/N. Thank you for staying.”
You nodded and turned back around heading towards the guest room on the opposite side of the hallway from Josh's room. The second the door clicked closed you felt overwhelmed again and tears began to pool in your eyes again.
God, you wanted him bad. You'd give anything.
****************************************************************
You woke up suddenly to a pitch dark room and a thumping heart, completely unsure as to why at first. Maybe a bad dream? Your eyes tried to adjust to the darkness around the room and you pulled the blankets up to your chin. You hated to admit it but sometimes being immersed in complete darkness made you unbelievably uncomfortable. Especially when you were in an unfamiliar place.
Which reminded you that you had a salt lamp on when you fell asleep in the room yet it was off. Why would it be off? You definitely didn’t turn it off. Maybe Josh popped in and turned it off while you were asleep?
Suddenly a bright flash filled the room and your heart rate picked up again, immediately anticipating the crash of thunder that followed. Yet you still felt yourself flinch underneath the covers of the warm bed as you felt the thunder shake the wood of the house as if it were easily breakable under immense force. With your senses now heightened you picked up on the sound of the wind howling outside, the sound of the rain picking up against the window pane. You were so lucky that the foot of the bed happened to be just at the edge of the window and right up against the exterior wall.
Another boom of thunder and you were now completely buried underneath the blankets. You never were a huge fan of thunderstorms, particularly at night. With the conclusion that you were probably not going to sleep anytime soon, you reached out of the safety of your blankets and snagged your phone off the bedside table, disconnecting it from the charger as it had no use when the power was out anyways.
12:32 AM.
You sighed and opened up your messages and clicked on your last message bar with Josh.
To Josh:
Hey. Any chance you're awake?
You laid there for a few moments, pulling up the weather app on your phone as the storm continued to pick up intensity outside.
Josh:
Just so happens that I am awake. I am downstairs, care to join?
You threw the covers off of yourself and turned the flashlight on your phone as you opened the bedroom door. You could see at the end of the hallway a soft glow of flickering orange. As you descended the stairs and into the living room you could see Josh clad in nothing but a white t-shirt and a pair of boxer briefs practically bouncing around the room with a lighter, lighting different candles in various parts of the room.
“Overkill much?” You huffed a laugh as he jumped at the sound of your voice.
“I would very much like to see where I am going in my house, Sunny.”
Another flash of lightning cut through the orange glow followed by a large boom of thunder once again testing the sturdiness of the house. You had winced from the flash and the sound of the thunder and didn't catch Josh looking at you now from across the room.
“You okay Sunny?”
“Yeah, thunderstorms… aren't really my thing.” You said as you made your way to the couch in the center of the room covered in blankets and pillows that weren't there earlier.
“I was going to come wake you actually, I'm glad you texted me. Figured it might be safer to shack up on the first floor of this house during the storms in case of anything bad happening.” He said as he made his way to the opposite end of the couch mirroring your position.
“You think something bad is going to happen?” You asked softly, pulling the blanket up to your chin.
Josh sat up straight quickly grabbing onto your covered foot. “No Sunny, gosh no! We are very safe here! I just wanted you to be downstairs with me so I could keep an eye on you. Especially more so now that I know you don't really like thunderstorms.” He gave you a sympathetic smile.
“I do feel better being down here with you Josh, thank you.”
“Of course Sunshine, anything for you.”
The shrill sound of an alert coming from both of your cellular devices caused you to jump practically into Josh's lap to which he let out a small giggle and wrapped his arm around your shoulders. “Its okay Sunny. I can't promise this little piece of technological imprisonment won't ruin your mind but I will do everything in my power to make sure it won't hurt you.” You watched as Josh swiped the notification away on his phone.
“What is the warning for Josh?” You asked in a small voice, heart once again pounding in your chest. You couldn't tell if the rush of adrenaline was from the loud shrill of a government alert or from the feeling of Josh's fingers softly rubbing your shoulder and the feather of his breath across your forehead. Both were most likely a contributing factor.
“Just a thunderstorm warning Sunny. But we will be okay. We have a sturdy shelter we are in right now, we have each other, I stand by my promise that I won't let anything hurt you.” He pulled you further into his lap then. Wrapping his arms around your waist and dragging you up until you laid in between his legs facing away from him, his legs lay on either side of your body.
Your heart leapt in your chest again. You were happy you were facing away from him so he couldn't see the deep red blush painted across your cheekbones as he moved your hair from the side of your face and neck to give him room to hang his head on your shoulder without having any barrier between his and your skin. The feeling of his breath through his nose on your neck was causing goosebumps to raise on your skin. The sound of the storm battering the windows and the soft feeling of his lips now grazing the side of your neck ever so slightly. Or you might just be imagining the feeling of his lips against you. Either way, his actions were causing your heart to continue to leap in your chest. He must've noticed because you felt the exhale of his breath come out fast against your pulse point.
“Sunny, like I said, no need to be nervous because of the storm-..”
Yeah, because your heart racing out of your chest was now solely because of the storm.
“I may or may not have a few joints pre rolled for special occasions”
“This is a special occasion? Me being terrified of a storm?”
Josh barked out a laugh against your ear. “Exactly so Y/N.”
“Well, I haven't really smoked in a long time, but why the hell not.” You rolled your eyes.
“That's the spirit!” Josh said, tapping the outside of your thigh to signal you to get up so he can retrieve said joints.
You watched from the comfort of your spot on the couch where Josh was just sitting moments before as he padded across the living room to a bookshelf. You watched him move a few books around before an “Aha!” sound came from his direction and he turned back to you with a little container. You watched as he waved the little box in the air and shot you a wink.
“Flounder!”
You snorted. “I'm sorry, flounder?”
Josh jumped back onto the couch spot next to you, his thighs pressing up against your calves as you were sitting cross legged facing him, giving you the perfect view of his side profile.
“Yeah Sunny! Flounder! Like, I-found-her. Don't tell me you don't get it!” He sent you a dazzling smile as he was unwrapping the bag containing the joints.
“You're such a goober, oh my god!” You laughed again, pushing your hand against the side of his shaved head.
*******************************************************************
A few minutes later you were now in a slight haze from the joint, feeling more relaxed now than you have since you were rudely awoken by the storm and the pitch black room. You and Josh were silently passing the joint back and forth between you, embracing the soft flickers of candle light together and surprisingly the more you set in, the less and less you were fearful of the rain hitting the windows.
“Sunny?” Josh asked, giggling slightly. “You good?”
You hadn't realized you zoned out and Josh had been holding the joint out to you again and you had failed to notice. “Huh? Oh! Yeah, I was just zoning out I guess.”
Josh giggled again, “No problem.”
You leaned your head back against the couch as you listened to Josh start to softly hum next to you in between puffing on the joint every once in a while.
“Sunny, you greened out or do you want to try and shotgun? The joint is almost gone, no pressure though..” He sounded nervous and his suggestion put you on edge. You knew how intimate shotgunning could be and the thought of being that close to Josh made your head spin.
“I guess I could take one more hit.”
“Atta girl,” Josh said, tapping your knee motioning for you to angle your body towards him. “It won't be that rough anyways, you know.”
You nodded, head spinning and heart beating wildly in your chest as he mirrored your position now.
“So how are we going to-..how do you want to-..how..” You stuttered out.
“Sunny, it's just me, relax, follow my lead.”
You gulped as his hand rested on your knee now. You watched as he brought the joint to his lips and pulled harshly. Causing the end of the joint to burn a bright orange. Quicker than you anticipated his eyes snapped up to your face, nostrils flared and he pulled your chin towards him.His lips now grazed yours ever so slightly, and your breath caught in your throat as you parted your lips slightly. The smoke escaped around the both of you as you had forgotten to inhale, easily intoxicated by the feeling of him being so close to you now. Josh let out a silent giggle, you could feel his plush lips turning up into a smile against yours.
Josh pulled back slightly and smiled at you. “Sunny, you forgot to inhale!”
You blushed furiously looking anywhere but his face, suddenly your hands seemed to be super interesting as your mouth grew dry. You weren't sure if it was from the weed or all the stress you have been through this entire evening. “Yeaaahh..oops?” You let out softly.
Josh giggled wildly. “You're adorable when you get flustered.”
Your eyes snapped to his face now, you watched as he took another inhale of the joint. “Who said I was flustered!”
He smiled as he exhaled and reached forward to knock the ash off the bottom of the joint into the ashtray sitting on the table. He turned back to you immediately after, lips twitching at the corners of his mouth.
“You look so pretty in the candlelight right now..” Josh whispered, his fingertips grazing your cheekbone, his eyes following his fingers.
You're unsure of who officially closed the distance first in your inebriated state of mind but next thing you knew his soft, plush, wet lips were softly pressed against yours. The feeling of his hand buried in your hair was the only thing that you could really focus on in that moment. The joint abandoned between Josh's fingers on his other hand between you, burning away..
Josh's soft, pillowy lips were dragging you into the most intense high you have ever experienced. He tasted sweet and felt even sweeter. The feeling of your lips finally melding together after months and months of pining felt like a drink of cold water on a hot summer's day.
Your bottom lip was briefly captured between his teeth and you felt him slightly nibble and then pull back. A gasp type moan escaped from you and Josh flashed you a dazzling smile before diving right back in. Josh's hand slipped down now from your hair into your lap, giving your thigh a squeeze. His squeeze turned into him desperately grabbing at you trying to pull you closer as your fingers gripped his jaw, tongues fighting each other for dominance.
“Mmmm, come here..” Josh turned away from you quickly to put out the burning joint in the ashtray and like lightning he gripped on your hips bringing you onto his lap, straddling him. His fingertips were now brushing up the hem of your sleep shirt to graze at the skin of your hips as your mouths reconnected again in a fervent fashion. The feeling of his soft, cold fingertips against your delicate skin causing you to momentarily gasp into his mouth and goosebumps fly across your skin. You felt yourself becoming more and more turned on by the moment and he explored your mouth with his. As you gripped onto the back of Josh neck harder, dragging him impossibly closer, his hips rose up and you could clearly feel his hard on pressing against your core causing you to let out the loudest mona of the night in your throat. Josh quickly pulled away from you causing you to panic slightly.
“Fuck Sunny, Im sorry.” he said, brushing a piece of hair away from your face. “I'm clearly getting ahead of myself here.”
You grabbed onto his face, forcing him to look you directly in the eyes. “No, no you're not. I want this.” You pecked his lips lightly. “I want you.”
“Fuck.” Josh gasped out and when your mouths met again, it was clear you both were about to cross the boundary between friends and neither of you had a problem with it.
You felt Josh's fingers slowly begin to drag up your sides underneath your shirt. Slow enough that it was frustrating for you. You hastily grabbed onto the bottom of the shirt and tore it off of you causing Josh to giggle. “Slow down Y/N, I want to savor this.”
His eyes turned a darker hue in the candle light as he took in the sight of your chest, finally bare for him. He wasted no time grabbing onto both of your breasts and squeezing the supple flesh together moaning out another ‘fuck’ under his breath. His mouth finally attached itself to one of your nipples, pulling and rolling the sensitive bud in between his lips. You felt his teeth graze against your nipple causing you to throw you head back. He left sloppy kisses across your chest as he moved to give the other one some much needed attention.
“Fucking hell Josh.” You moaned as you felt yourself becoming more and more aroused.
He looked up at you with hooded eyes and a slight smirk on his lips.
That stupid fucking smirk again.
His fingers now grazing your nipples simultaneously as your mouths reconnected again. You felt him begin to pull and tug on your breasts causing you to toss your head back again and he watched you get drunk on the feeling of his hands and now his very, very obvious hard on through his briefs as you had begun grinding yourself along his impressive length once more. his right hand still on your hip encouraging your steady movement.
The feeling of him hard and tucked away between your thin sleep shorts and his thin boxer briefs started driving you mad. Your moans now freely flowing out as you focused on Josh's face watching yours. Your foreheads practically pressing together. Josh let out a soft moan, causing you to clench around nothing.
“That feel good, sweet girl? Are you making a mess of your panties on top of me right now? I bet you are..”
You watched as Josh looked down to where you were dragging yourself lazily along his length, both of his hands now pressed into your hips guiding you along. You watched as his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes snapped back up to yours.
“Y/N, can I please touch you? You're driving me crazy..”
“Please..” You said, dragging your lips against his right ear, pulling his golden hoop in between your lips and sucking softly.
This must’ve thrown him off the edge because next thing you knew, he was pushing you down on your back and he was leaning over you, finger tips grazing over your clothed core.
A fresh tingling feeling made its way to your lower half as his soft fingers grazed a small path right up your slit to where your covered clit was and all the way back down again. Josh watched your eyebrows furrow in pleasure. He couldn't believe he finally had you in the way he dreamed of but never admitted out loud. So many late nights were spent in the confined spaces of his bunk on the tour bus, fighting the urge to touch himself underneath the covers at the thought of you.
You felt his fingers now dip underneath the seam of your underwear and graze across your wet core. A shameful moan escaped you as you felt his fingers at first slowly graze against the wetness then switch up and apply more pressure, breaking against the dam to truly feel you.
“Oh my fuck, my sweet girl, youre so wet.” Josh let out what sounded like a painful moan.
“A-all for you Josh”
Your head snapped back as his finger came in contact with your swollen clit, swirling around it a few times. Watching how your body reacted to him in complete awe.
He ripped away from you then, causing a pathetic moan to come out of your mouth at the loss of contact. “I need to get these clothes off of you babe. I need to see you, and feel you even more.”
You watched from your spot as Josh pulled his own shirt over his head and then dragged your shorts and underwear down. Your legs clamped shut, suddenly feeling a bout of self consciousness.
“Hey,” Josh whispered. “It's just me Sunny, no need to be shy.”
His fingers tips slowly grazing a path from your ankles up to your knees. You nodded at him when he lifted an eyebrow at you and his hands made the move to part your legs. You watched as his lips parted and his eyes grow wide as he finally saw all of you for the first time.
“Oh my god,” he whispered. “Come here.”
Josh moved to kneel down on the floor in front of the couch, dragging your hips as best as he could along the way. You were now sitting up, hips against the edge of the couch as Josh began to trail sloppy kisses up one thigh and down the other.
“Josh” You moaned out breathlessly, diving your fingers into his curls on the top of your head as best you could as he was moving.
He nipped the inside of your knee ever so lightly, “Mmmm, I love hearing you say my name like that.”
“Josh, please..” You tried to drag him up to your core, desperate to feel him against you.
“I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have thought about you like this. In my bunk, in my hotel room shower, in the green rooms..”
You watched as he looked up at you and winked just before finally dragging his tongue along your slit. Your core clenched around nothing at the contact of his warm, wet tongue against you and a moan ripped through your chest as he did it again, only this time he stopped at the top of your clit and sucked lightly.
“Mmmm, you taste so much better than I imagined.”
Your body felt like it was on fire with the pleasure rippling from your core spreading to your toes and your fingertips as he continued this pattern between licking through your folds to your entrance and then dragging up to your clit again. He gave your clit a few soft kisses before diving between your fold again. Moans were freely flowing through your mouth by now and Josh was hanging onto your legs to prevent you from clamping around his head from the pleasure shaking through your body.
You felt as he pulled one of your lower lips into his mouth, sucking sharply before releasing and repeating on the other side. He then turned his focus to your clit sucking sharply there, thrashing his head side to side every now and then.
You were already teetering on the edge of your release, so much so that when you felt Joshs fingers push past your entrance and curl up a few times along with his assault on your clit, your body went aflame with white hot pleasure as you released all over his fingers, clenching wildly.
You couldn't hear your own moans through the contractions of your orgasm but you were pretty sure you were screaming his name.
Josh was still slowly dragging his fingers in and out of you as you were still clenching around him. You felt him kissing the inside of your thighs,alternating between both as he waited for you to come down.
“Holy fuck.” You breathed out, combing your fingers through the curls on the top of his head again. He chuckled against your thigh.
“Yeah?” He asked, looking up at you. “That was the hottest fucking thing ive ever had the pleasure of witnessing.”
You giggled as he stood up in front of you, pulling you to your feet as well, wrapping his arms around your waist to stabilize your shaky legs. “I almost came in my shorts.” he giggled, kissing your forehead.
You took note of how hard and heavy he was pressed against your leg. “Now its your turn.” You winked at him dropping to your knees and pulling his boxers down with you. You watched with wide eyes as his cock sprung forward in front of you. Your eyes widened and your core clenched again as you noted how long and thick he actually was. You looked back up at his face just as he was brushing your hair through his fingers, tugging you up lightly.
“Sunny, as much as I want that, I can't wait anymore, I need to be inside you. Please.” He cast doe eyes down at you, eyebrows furrowed as if he was in pain.
You smiled up at him, just as eager to feel him buried inside of you as you placed a wet kiss against his head watching his stomach muscles shudder.
“Oh Y/N..” He moaned and threw his head back. Just as you were about to repeat your actions, you felt Josh's hands under your arms, yanking you up to your feet again only to be pushed down into the same position you started off with him on the couch in the first place. Your legs hung open wide in anticipation for what was coming next.
Your lips connected once again, hot and heavy as you felt him start to drag himself along your core. Teasing your entrance, then back out and around the rest of your swollen core and then back again just teasing his head in and out of your briefly. Your body felt on fire again. The teasing from the anticipation of feeling him fully buried inside of you making the hars on your head stand at attention and goosebumps littering your skin. The feeling of lust driving you insane.
You pulled away from him, “Josh please please stop teasing me, I need you.”
“As you wish, sweet girl.”
With that, he pushed himself past the threshold of your entrance, slowly stretching you out. He was definitely bigger than those you had been with in the past and the feeling of him pressing against your walls made your eyes flutter shut. Josh let out a gasp as he finally was fully buried inside of you. Your eyes opened back again when he started thrusting inside of you only to see he was already looking down at you with that same pained expression on his face.
“Fuck Y/N, youre amazing. You feel so good.” His head dropped into the crook of your neck and he started placing sloppy kisses from your ear down to your collarbone, adding a few lips nips from his teeth here and there as he began thrusting harder.
You don't think you've ever felt so much pleasure and so full as his thrusts continued to become sharper against your cervix. His trimmed pelvic hair was adding just the right amount of friction to your clit with each thrust you were unsure how much longer you were going to last. His body, his scent, the way he felt was becoming so overwhelming for you. Tears began to prick the corner of your eyes as he leaned back on his knees dragging your hips up and changing the angle of his thrusts to now connect solely with your g-spot.
“Oh fuck, oh my fuck, right there!” You yelled out, hands grasping at the front of his thighs in desperation to stop his hard thrusts.
Josh smirked down at you, his dimple making its appearance on his cheek as he moved one of his hands from your thigh he was gripping onto tightly, to your lower belly and pressing down. Adding to the pressure on your g spot. “Is that it sunny? Is that the spot?”
You chanted out “yes” in time with his thrusts, brain feeling like it was going numb from all the pleasure that was spreading through your body. Just as you felt like you were about to pour over the edge finally, he pulled out and placed your hips down on the couch again.
You immediately pouted and thrashed your head side to side, “No no no come back no please..”
He shushed you immediately and rubbed the outside of your thigh, “Calm down honey, I just want to change positions. Come here.”
You watched him step off the couch and he guided you so you were leaning with your torso pressed up against the back of the couch, resting on your knees. You shook your hips at him trying to entice him to hurry and fill you up again. He giggled at your movements and brushed his hands along your hips down to your ass to spread you apart for him. You weren't sure why you were expecting him to be gentle but he was far from it as he roughly thrusted into you again. The new angle made your head spin immediately, once again you felt the hair on your head stand at attention as the only thing you could truly feel was how big he felt inside of you, his sharp unforgiving thrusts, and his hips snapping against you. “Oh fuck, you love it from behind dont you. Listen to you babe, you're a mess.”
You felt as Josh gathered your hair that was hanging down your back into a makeshift ponytail, pulling you back up against him so you were flush with his chest, his thrusts never fully slowing down. His teeth grazed your ear, “Do me a favor baby, I'm so close. Rub your clit, rub your pretty little clit like I know you do when you’re alone and wet and swollen. Show me how you treat her so nice, she makes you feel so good doesn't she?”
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you felt him push you back against the couch, one hand still buried in your hair at the nape of your neck and the other grabbing roughly onto your hip as his thrusts became sharper. Your fingers trailed down to give your clit attention like he asked you to and you began rubbing sharp circles around it, making you clench around him.
Josh moaned out behind you, “Such a good girl, listening so well. I'm not going to last long. I need you to cum.” Josh's words sent you over the edge faster than you anticipated. The ball of pleasure snapped again in your core and you were clenching wildly around him. “There it is, there’s my good girl. Cum all over me. Just like that.” He wailed out. You felt as he pulled out of you, spurts of his cum landing on your lower back. Moaning along with him. You both took a moment trying to catch your breath and come back down to earth after such an intense high. Josh made the first move.
“Don't move yet, Sunshine.” He tapped your hip and you felt him move briefly behind you, grabbing a cloth of some sort and wiping his release off of your back. Both of you stood briefly, redressing and giggling amongst yourselves. Once you were both dressed, Josh dragged you down on top of him as he laid back on the couch wrapping you both up in the blankets. You snuggled your nose into the side of his neck as his arm that was wrapped around you was rubbing up and down your arm. Your body felt weak from the recent activities.
“Well that was a good distraction from the storm.” You giggled, tracing shapes softly onto his chest. He laughed wildly. “I guess you could say that Sunny.”
Silence fell amongst you two again and your mind started to wander. What did this mean for the two of you? Did you truly just ruin your friendship? How were you supposed to move forward..Josh noticed you tense up against him and he brushed his lips against your forehead breathing your scent in deeply. “What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?”
You sighed, “I just, I hope nothing is ruined between us Josh. I don't want to lose you in my life.
“Hey, hey..” He pushed himself up so now he was leaning over you, hand grazing your cheekbone. “Nothing is ruined between us. I want you in my life. I want you in my life for as long as you will have me Sunny. If it wasn't blatantly obvious before I hope it is now,” He paused and pressed a sweet kiss to your lips which you gladly reciprocated.
“I want to call you mine, I want to walk into a room with you and show you off, brag about you until people beg me to shut the fuck up.” You giggled at him.
“You truly are the sky, the moon, and the stars. You are wondrous, and I find myself falling in love with you more and more each day. My celestial love. Please let me call you my one and only.”
Instead of answering him with words you pulled him back into you, kissing him as hard as you could.
He giggled against your lips, “I'll take that as a yes.”
“Take it as an absolutely. Josh you have me, all of me.”
“I'm so happy to hear that love.” His fingers grazed against your cheekbone again. “My sweet, sweet Sunshine. You are so beautiful.”
He laid back down pulling you closer than before, tangling his limbs with yours and tucking your head against his chest practically suffocating you. “Lets go to sleep. Hopefully the power will be back on in the morning and I can make you your favorite breakfast.”
You hummed against him and buried your nose into his skin, basking in the scent of his natural musk. He made you feel so safe and wanted. You found your eyelids growing heavy finally.
“Hey Josh?” You mumbled.
“Hmm?”
“Shouldn't we blow out the candles before we fall asleep?”
You watched as he pinched the bridge of his nose, looking around the room at all the candles still burning away, “Why did I have to light so fucking many Sunny..”
You two giggled and you watched as he got up and started moving around the room blowing out each candle.
How did you end up here and get so lucky? You're not sure, but you could not wait to see where this went.
****************************************************************
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this fic of mine :) thanks for sticking around and finishing it. Tell me your thoughts !
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what I'm manifesting in 2025!
First of all, if you are an anti loa or anti shifting, please dni and scroll!
I wanted to make this post so I can remember during the year what I planned and bring the success stories to motivate myself! And also, for you guys to know what my goals are😽
–I always have good grades without making too much effort, and i don't feel overwhelmed or bored when studying.
–i feel comfortable with my body and i stay the same weight regardless of what i eat.
–I have a really silky and healthy hair, and people always compliment it. I changed the curvature to 3b.
–my mom has finally found someone she genuinely loves and he's my step dad now! He is a pretty wealthy man and can support both of us with his own money.
–I always hang out with my friends, and we always have such great moments together. They are always loyal and supportive with me. I find it very easy to make new friends and being shy is not a problem anymore.
–we selled our old house and we bought our dream house after so long. We also moved cities and my friend did too to live with her parents.
–after meeting my step dad, we started traveling really often, almost once in two months we travel and stay the weekend there, sometimes when we feel like, we stay a little longer and that doesn't affect my academic life.
–i always have the products i want, it doesn't matter if it's skincare, makeup etc, i always have it and they work like magic.
-my mom got her drivers license and we bought a beautiful new car.
I have sooo much more, but these ones are my principals this year. And of course, i know i have everything, and i don't need to worry about my results bc everything is already done, but i'd like to share my journey here😺
Thanks for reading!
#affirm and persist#loass#manifesting#affirmations#loa tumblr#success story#loassblog#loassumption#loa#loablr#manifestation#law of assumption#neville goddard
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Just Friends - Part 7
Happy Friday before Christmas and Hanukkah to those who celebrate!
Read the previous part here!
Warnings: hahahahahaha (and swearing)
WC: 3305
____________________
“What are you doing this weekend?” Javier bursts into Emeline’s classroom, causing her to nearly drop the beakers she was trying to put away.
The last period of the week had just let out, the teachers trapped in the building until their contract hours were up even though the only thing they wanted was to go home. She needed something to do, and what better task than cleaning her lab in a futile attempt to make her next week that much easier for herself?
Thanksgiving had just passed, leading the students to be more feral than normal for who knows what reason, their energy unfortunately renewed after their long break, the teachers more agitated than normal because of the students, and admin more oblivious to all of this than normal because that’s what they did best at times like these.
“Hibernating,” Emeline deadpans, looking around her classroom. Her energy was depleting fast, the motivation to clean already gone.
Javier laughs. “Nothing fun planned?”
Emeline shakes her head, walking back over to her desk to start to pack up her bag. “After this week? Do you know how much glassware my kids broke?”
“Over or under a thousand dollars?”
Emeline thinks for a second. “I would love to believe it’s under,” she groans, sitting down at her desk. “Do we think Anderson would approve it if I bought more beakers?”
The two exchange a look before both saying, “No.”
“I’ll buy them for you,” he tells her, taking out his phone. But, come on, you can’t be doing nothing this weekend. Fran and Maddy have nothing planned?”
“Fran I think is already on her way home to see her brother for something and Maddy is probably going to be out with John all weekend that he’s not doing his own job. Plus, I one hundred percent have a hot date.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, my bed and the fictional men in the books that I read are going to be very happy together.”
Javier opens and closes his mouth while he tries to find the words. “Sometimes it’s better to lie to people.”
“Lying involves way more energy than I have. Anyway, why do you care? You’ve never asked me about my weekend plans.”
“That’s not true.”
“What did I do last weekend?”
Javier stares at her for a second, the smirk on Emeline’s face growing because she knew she was right. “Whatever. You probably did the same thing you’re planning on doing this weekend, apparently. There’s a new place in the city that I want to try and no one else wants to go with me.”
“So?”
“Do you want to go?”
“I love being the last choice. It’s every girl's dream.”
“I’ll pay.”
“I love getting free food, it’s every girl’s dream,” she said, in the same sarcastic tone as before despite the fact that she meant it this time. She looked around her classroom, the chairs in disarray and her back lab counters covered in things she should have put away earlier in the week. “God, I really should put all this stuff away, first.”
Javier looks to the back of her classroom. “It’s a Monday problem now, come on.”
“Hey, there’s an arm in this sleeve,” Emeline protests as Javier grabs her by the coat, dragging her along to the T stop right near their school. This seemed suspicious, given that he was putting her on the red line to go out to what she for some reason assumed was a dinner despite the fact that it was barely four pm. “Are we going for a senior citizen discount here?”
“It gets really busy, really fast,” Javier claims, not looking up from his phone. He was getting text after text from a bunch of different unsaved numbers, Emeline knowing he would never not save it once he knew who it was. But why was he smiling? “Even if we get there at 4:30 like Maps is saying we will, we’re going to have to wait at least an hour and a half or longer before we can sit.”
“Reservations aren’t a thing?” she asks dryly. The last thing she wanted to do after a long week was wait a long time to get food. Lunch was at eleven am, dinner time was supposed to start right when she got home, which seemed to be getting later and later as the semester wore on.
“They don’t take them, and I didn’t even know you would say yes if I wanted to put our names in.”
Emeline laughs. “See, that’s where you’re different from everyone else in my life. They would just put our names down and then use that as a reason why we would have to go, no choice given.”
“Even Jeremy is like that?”
Emeline looks at him, Javier still glued to his phone and whatever looked to be a group chat that was going off on his screen. Was Jeremy like that? “Jeremy would have asked me two weeks in advance and then confirmed three times day of to make sure I still wanted to go. He wouldn’t make me do anything I didn’t want to.” She wasn’t even sure if that was true. But it seemed like it would be.
“Look at you blushing,” Javier teases her, Emeline not even realizing the heat in her face was visible to him. “So you’re not still seeing that Kaylen guy?”
“Um, no actually, I’m not,” she tells him, not even bothering to correct him. “After seven years, we’re not together anymore.”
Javier’s face drops. “Oh, Em, I’m sorry.”
Emeline shrugs, like the last seven years she had been with him were nothing, like she was trying to tell herself, it was just a blip in her own timeline. “It’s fine. It happened last week. I haven’t even told Fran and Maddy yet.”
“Well that explains it.”
“Explains what?”
“You’ve been off all week.”
Emeline thinks back, trying to figure out if he was right. She didn’t have time to show emotion in her classroom; everything was about the students. If she was having a bad day, she had to pretend like she wasn’t because her students needed her to not have a bad day. She had to go on like everything was normal, like she hadn’t just ended something with someone who was in her life when it felt like it all came crashing down. She went on like she always did. “I have not.”
“You made the girls run four miles as a cool down yesterday.”
“They have to run between three and five every game.”
“We’re not even in season.”
“So I pushed them a little harder, that doesn’t mean I’ve been off.”
“They were in full gear.”
“And?”
“You ran with them.”
“I was setting an example as their coach. If I can’t do it, how do I expect them to do it?”
“Why haven’t you told Fran and Maddy?” Javier asks, giving up as he drags her into the train she didn’t even realize had pulled up in front of them. They managed to find two seats, their bags in their laps as people squished in all around them. “You tell them everything.”
“It happened while we were up in Vermont and then they left for Thanksgiving.”
“And you didn’t have time to tell them in the last week?”
“I would get home and just go to bed.”
“That’s what happens when you run four miles as a cool down,” Javier teases, nudging her shoulder with his. “You’re worried about something. You would have told them if you weren’t afraid.”
Emeline glares at him. “What are you talking about?”
Javier laughs, looking back down at his phone, the unknown numbers in the group chat sending message after message. “You would have told them if you weren’t afraid,” he repeats. “You aren’t afraid of what they’ll do to him, because I know you don’t have it in you to care because I know they’ll threaten to kill him but they’ll never actually go through with it because neither of them could survive in jail. You’re afraid they’re going to bring up you liking Jeremy as the reason why you broke up with him, whether it’s true or not.”
“It’s not true.”
“You can tell me that, but did you fight to stay with Kenny? Did you fight him when you broke up? Because I know you well enough to know that you wouldn’t have initiated it if it meant that it was going to hurt him.”
Emeline stares at her bag, noticing every out of place piece of thread on the Vera Bradley bag her grandmother bought her when she started at Boston College. The bag was old by fashion standards, looking like it had taken a beating the last how many years she had owned it. The straps were ripping, the zipper was close to its last leg. The fabric on the bottom of the bag had worn away from it constantly being kicked out of the way by either a student or herself when they needed to come ask her something at her desk. It was one of the last things her grandmother gave her. “Keelan broke up with me. But I didn’t fight him. I just told him I didn’t care anymore.”
“Well, forget about him,” Javier says, getting up and dragging her yet again towards this unknown restaurant he never told her the name of. The cold air outside hit her face much harder than she expected, the chill of November turning into December somehow catching her off guard despite being from Massachusetts. “We’re going to have fun tonight. So much fun, in fact, that the name Cameron will be the last thing from your mind.”
Emeline finally lets out a laugh. “Well, considering that wasn’t his name, it shouldn’t be that hard.” Javier leads her down the street, a part of Boston that Emeline barely ever went to. She was sure that the Garden was somewhere close to them, practically forcing her mind to wander to Jeremy.
Jeremy is the same as Keelan was when they first got together. The difference was that Jeremy hasn’t stopped acting like he cares for Emeline, like she lit up the room for him whenever she was around. Jeremy was the one to check on her no matter what, he was the one who could tell when she was feeling off for one reason or another, he was the one who knew and could anticipate everything about her. He definitely was falling in love with her. She could see it in everything he did.
Keelan hadn’t acted like that since they got together.
“Can I ask you something, and promise you won’t get mad?” Javier asks, snapping her out of her thoughts.
“We both know if you have to say that then I will definitely be getting mad at you.”
“Did you really love Kingston? More than you love Jeremy?”
“Woah, wait,” Emeline stops, Javier nearly falling over at the sudden change in momentum. “I never said I love Jeremy.”
“Emeline,” Javier lets out, shaking his head. “You light up whenever someone mentions his name. Your students have been talking about how much you talk about hockey now in your class, way more than you ever talked about lacrosse despite the fact that you told me that was what helped you get through college and high school. Your phone background for the last month has been a picture of the two of you sitting on a couch together, mid-laugh, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t look at someone I don’t love the way you are looking at each other.”
Emeline looks down at her feet, pulling her bag close to her body. “I did love Keelan. I think I loved him until I met Jeremy.” She could feel her face getting hot despite the wind hitting it, sniffling and finally letting the tears that had been stinging her eyes fall down her cheeks. What if she was just miss reading things with Jeremy? What if he wasn’t falling in love with her? “What if I messed everything up with Keelan for a guy who won’t ever love me back?”
“If he knows what’s good for him, he probably loved you the moment he saw you.” The two of them just stand on the sidewalk for a moment, ignoring the snides of the people who were dodging them. “Do you still want to go to this tonight?”
She shakes her head, trying her best to blink away the hot that she knew were about to fall if she dwelled on this any more.. “We can go. I think it’ll be good. Take my mind off whatever Inferno-like journey is about to go on.”
Javier gives a hesitant laugh with her. “You should have been an English teacher.”
“Have you seen me try to write an essay?”
Javier takes her hand again, leading her down the street. What would happen if she and Jeremy had started dating? She had insisted for so long that the feelings she had for him were friendly at best, nothing more. But they weren’t. She wasn’t sure they ever were.
“We’re here.” Javier stops so abruptly, Emeline nearly knocks him off his feet. There were no signs anywhere, just a building.
“Is this where you take your murder victims or something? This isn’t a restaurant.”
“Stop reading murder mystery books,” Javier laughs, pulling her inside.
Javier leads her up a set of stairs, the entire inside of the building pitch black. He opens a door, leading her into a room, which is again, pitch black. Emeline couldn’t even see her hands in front of her face if she tried. “If you kill me, I’m going to come back and haunt you.”
“I wouldn’t put it past you, Em,” she hears, not Javier’s voice.
Before she could say anything, the lights turn on, what sounded like a hundred voices yelling, ‘Surprise’ at her. Emeline gasps, her hands flying to cover her mouth. “What the hell?”
Fran, Maddy, and Johnny stand in front of a crowd of her friends; people from high school who she hadn’t seen in years, classmates from college, her teammates, guys from the men’s team, various other random people that she swore she knew from years past that Fran and Maddy had kept in touch with, Johnny and Jeremy’s teammates and their partners they just met last week.
“What is this?” she says, Javier hugging her from behind.
“Happy birthday.”
“I’m offended that you thought we would kill you here of all places,” Fran says, her and Maddy squeezing her tight for a hug as Javier takes her work bag from her.
“If anything, we would do it where no one would find you until you started to smell.”
“I’ve never had a surprise party,” Emeline says, looking at everything in awe. The space was lit up with fairy lights strung up everywhere, clear balloons filled with confetti in various shades of green, her favorite color, floating everywhere. There was a ‘Happy 25th Birthday Emeline,’ sign in the back, with an easel that said ‘Leave your favorite memory with Em’ on the table right below it, already covered with things from all her friends that were there. The food tables were off to the side, the walls decorated with pictures of her and her friends. She could make out pictures with her dad and grandmother from when she was little, pictures of her, Fran and Maddy when they first met at their summer camp before starting as freshmen, the picture of her and Jeremy that was the aforementioned lock screen on her phone. “Did you guys do all this?”
Fran, Javier, and Maddy all shake their heads. “We just did the guest list,” Maddy admits, “And Javier was in charge of getting you here from work.”
Emeline shakes her head, confused. “Then who did all this?” The only other person who knew she never had a surprise party was Keelan. It couldn’t have been him. He wouldn’t break up with her and throw her a party a week later, would he?
“I did,” she hears, watching Jeremy come out from the crowd of people in front of her. She should be cringing at how dramatic and corny it was of him to do that, but she felt her heart race instead. Of course, he would do this for her. “Happy birthday, Emeline.”
“To our friend Emeline,” Johnny yells, Emeline not even noticing that everyone had glasses passed out to them while she was lost looking at Jeremy. She could feel her heart starting to race just looking at him, barely caring that everyone who meant something to her was staring at her.
Everyone raises their glasses, one of her own finding its way to her hands without her looking away from Jeremy.
“To Emeline.”
Everyone floods her before she can process what was going on, wishing her happy birthday and trying to get in a minimal conversation with her as Fran, Maddy, Javier, and Johnny didn’t leave her side. The entire time, she focused on Jeremy standing off to the side, swirling his drink in his glass while he couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her.
The party finally officially starts, the music loud, her friends dancing, eating, and laughing. Emeline finally goes over to Jeremy, taking his hand and dragging him out to the hallway she had come in from.
“You did this?”
Jeremy looks down at his feet, his cheeks turning red. “Of course.”
“But, why?” Emeline lets out, feeling her heart race.
“Emeline, you know I would do anything for you.” Emeline could feel her heart swell. God, she did have feelings for him. Fran and Javier might be right that she was in love with him. She wanted to love him. She just didn’t know if she did; her feelings for him were different than what she felt for Keelan. She felt better about Jeremy. She felt safer with him around, more at ease. She wanted to see him whenever she could, wanted to talk to him to hear his voice.
She wanted to kiss him right there. She stepped closer to him, Jeremy reaching out to take her hand in his. Emeline starts to lean forward, her mind not registering Jeremy doing the same because her heart was beating so loud that even she was sure he could hear it. He had to want to kiss her, too, right?
“Em,” Fran interrupts, Emeline disconnecting from Jeremy and nearly jumping into the wall behind her. “Come back here!”
Jeremy lets out a nervous laugh, looking back down at his feet. “Let’s go. It’s your party, you should be in there.”
Emeline takes his hand back in hers, feeling him give her a gentle squeeze. They walk back in, Jeremy leading her. He stops, dropping her hand immediately, Emeline moving around him to see why he stopped.
Her heart dropped.
“Keelan?” Emeline walks up to him, not expecting to see him, but not wanting to either. “What are you doing here? How did you know about this?”
“Fran and Maddy invited me.” Emeline looks over at her roommates, their confused looks reminding her that they had no idea what happened the week before. “I had to come to my girlfriend's birthday.”
“Can we go talk somewhere else?” Emeline whispers.
“In a bit. First, I have to do this, especially in front of all our friends.” Keelan reaches into his pocket, getting down on one knee and making Emeline feel like she was about to vomit at the thought that he was friends with people in this room too and what she was sure he was about to do. “Emeline Odette Pritchard, will you marry me?”
#jswayman#jeremy swayman#swayman#jeremy swayman fic#jeremy swayman imagine#nhl#nhl imagine#nhl fic#hockey#hockey fic
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baby, please - part 16
You wake up in the middle of the night and something doesn't feel right...
Warnings: This is a very sensitive chapter. If you are uncomfortable with anything involving being with doctors/in hospital, or miscarriage/pregnancy loss, please do not read. There's lots of mentions of blood. Medical jargon, I've done my best to research as much as possible but it still may be inaccurate. Mentions of unsupportive parents/family. Holiday talk (Thanksgiving - I am British so I’m just going off research on this). Mention of being sick, so emetophobia warning. Wine drinking (not you, obviously). Little swearing. Accidental Addison Montgomery cameo - I like to think it was a little nod to the original writing of Baby, Please. LONG chapter, and barely proofread. Word count: 5,317 F!Reader, no use of Y/N.
Part 15 ● Series Masterlist ● Part 17
You try not to jump in and take control of the meeting about the next launch; the project had been passed over to another team leader, who did things…not wrong, but different. Different to how you would do it anyway. You sit back in your chair, biting your tongue, as Kelsie, the other team leader, signifies ‘how little time we have on this launch’, that ‘original plans are out the window’ and ‘all hands need to be on deck’. This newest client wanted their product advertised - and on the market - as soon as possible, or at least advertised before Christmas.
It was going to be tough. And with Thanksgiving coming up, everyone was trying to get as much done in the week before the long weekend.
It was your first holiday without your family. Normally you would have booked a flight over to your parents’ house and spent Thanksgiving there, but no-one had contacted you, and it wasn’t from lack of trying on your end. You’d gone into the family group chat (that had been quiet since you revealed your pregnancy – you had the suspicion that a new chat was created without you) and sent a message to everyone, just checking in and wishing them a ‘happy holidays’. You figured they’d all had enough time to cool off and get used to the idea that you were pregnant, and you were doing okay, that they would love to see you and catch up, where you could tell them all about the babies you were growing. But no. You'd heard nothing back. They’d probably made a new family chat without you.
You did have a slight breakdown to Beth and Courtney about it, and that was when Beth invited you to her and Georgia’s for Thanksgiving dinner. You insisted you’d be fine, that you’d have dinner by yourself, but she wasn’t hearing any of it. So, thankfully, you had somewhere to be and someone to be with, since Santi had plans in Panama City with his sisters, who he had recently contacted again. They gave him shit for essentially disappearing but invited him back into their lives without even blinking.
You hadn’t expected him to invite you along, since it was a reunion of sorts, and he was telling them about you and the babies. He didn’t want to throw everything on them at once. Also, you didn’t expect him to invite you, because things had been a little awkward since the almost-kiss on Halloween. Neither of you had said anything about it, you chalked it up to the alcohol he’d been drinking. Santi was a flirt with everyone; it was probably just a blip, probably not even worth mentioning. He didn’t feel the same as you did about him.
It was fine. Everything was fine.
The meeting finished after another gruelling half an hour, and with a sigh, you grab your empty notebook (you really needed to start paying attention and taking notes) and stand from the chair. You were hungry, and tired, and your feet were hurting. In fact, everything was hurting. You were, honestly, feeling miserable. You needed to pee all the time, and you had a constant foot stuck under your ribs, which also hurt, and made it hard to breathe.
“What are your plans for Thanksgiving?” Emily asks you as you sit at your desk.
“I’m going to my friend’s,” you reply, huffing as you sit at your desk, already out of breath. Jesus, you’re the size of a whale. And you’re just going to get bigger.
“Oh,” Emily said. “You not going to be with your...baby daddy?”
“No, he’s visiting family,” you reply, turning back to your emails. “He’s not seen them for a while, so...” you then give her a look. “Don’t call him my ‘baby daddy’.”
“Well what else do I call him, you haven’t given us any information!” Emily cried, rolling her eyes in exasperation.
You grin as you type out an email to the clients regarding their wants and needs for their advertising. You found it funny that Emily hadn’t put two and two together; that it was Santiago that was the father of your kids. That she was the one who set you both up together in the first place. She knew you were due in February; she could do the math. She lived next door to him, for God’s sake, how had she not seen you coming and going?
“My private life is separate from my work life...for once,” you say. “I’d like to keep it that way, for a little while.”
“So I eventually will know who he is, then?” Emily asked.
“Probably. Maybe.”
“Boo, boring,” Emily called, before turning to her own computer.
Maybe you’d throw her a bone. You needed some entertainment since you’d taken a few steps back in work. “Fine. What do you want to know?”
“His name?” Emily asked, looking back at you with wide, hopeful eyes.
You shake your head no. “Ask for something else.”
Emily groans before looking at you. “Fine. Are you guys like, dating, or anything? Or is it just a...”
“A what?” you ask.
“Well, are you dating or are you just...keeping him around?”
“’Keeping him around��?”
“Look, I don’t know how sensitive this is!” Emily cries, throwing her hands up in surrender at the look on your face.
You tut and roll your eyes at her theatrics. “No, we’re not dating. We’re, like...friends now, I guess. He’s sticking around for the kids. It’s nice.”
Emily hums in thought before turning back to her computer again. “Okay. Cool. It’s nice to know you’re not alone in this, you know?”
“I wasn’t ever going to be alone; I have my friends.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Single mothers get along just fine without the fathers,” you mutter. “Now let’s drop it, okay? We’ve got a lot of stuff to do and not an awful lot of time.”
“I didn’t mean to offend - “
“You’ve...” you start to say she hadn’t, but you stop yourself, because you might snap at her, and it isn’t her fault for your bad mood. You take a deep breath before shaking your head, trying to give her a soft look. “You haven’t offended me. I just feel like I have a lot going on at the moment. Work is busy, it’s the holidays and I'm not spending it with my family, and I'm pregnant. I constantly need to pee, I’m always hurting somewhere, and...” And I'm in love with Santiago and I can’t do anything about it. “And I’m just feeling it at the moment.”
Emily nods, giving you a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry. The holidays are always a tough time of year.”
You nod and turn back to your emails. “Yeah.”
“If it’s any comfort, I think you’re handling everything like a champ,” Emily says.
“Thanks,” you say, giving her a small smile. “It means a lot.”
And you meant it.
You stand outside Beth and Georgia’s house, holding a box of brownies and a bottle of wine, your contribution to the Thanksgiving dinner (you’d attempted to make the brownies yourself, but it almost, almost, ended in tears and they had tasted awful when you were done; you ended up buying a Betty Crocker mix from the store where you only needed to add an egg and some oil and water). You’d been feeling a little off all day, woozy and just generally unwell. You put it down to holiday jitters and anxiety (your family still hadn’t contacted you, and Santi was a little quiet – but you couldn’t blame him, he was still at his sister’s house). So, you made yourself get ready and vowed to enjoy yourself at Beth’s house.
Which was where you were now. You stood outside on the porch. You can hear the muffled chatter of family and the laughs of children as they play through the house, and it reminds you of Halloween at the Morales’s. You feel your cheeks warm at the memory of the kitchen. Shaking your head, clearing the images from your brain, you ring the doorbell. You swallow down the urge to vomit, shaking your head and putting on a smile.
You wait a few moments before Beth opens the door, smiling widely at you. “Hey, you!”
You greet her back as she moves aside, letting you in. You loved Beth’s house. It was always warm, and inviting, and full of sentiment, even when her day-to-day work meant that her client’s want modern and minimalist living spaces. “Thanks for letting me come today. It’s been a tough week.”
“Oh my God, don’t even thank me, you’re welcome any time,” Beth said, closing the door behind you. “Here, let me take those.” She grabs the wine and the brownies from you. “Ooh, Châteauneuf-du-Pape, very nice.” She gives you an impressed look.
You take off your jacket and hang it in the closet by the front door. “I hope you enjoy it because I might just cry about not having any.”
“I’m taking a leaf out of Gabs’s book, I’ll not drink tonight out of consolidation,” Beth says, leading you into the kitchen, where you take a deep breath and inhale the smells of the turkey and vegetables in the oven. Despite your upset stomach, the food did smell amazing. She places the brownies and the wine on the marble countertop. “Stocked up on Diet Coke for you.” She grabs a can from the fridge.
You thank her as you take the can, but you don’t open it. You both go through into the living room. You take a deep breath before slowly letting it go, giving a smile to Georgia as she approaches you, giving you a hug. You then thank her for letting you join their Thanksgiving, and, like Beth, tells you to ‘stop being silly’, and that you ‘were always welcome, holiday or not’.
Dinner goes well. You mingle and meet some of Georgia’s family, who talk to you about the wedding and what plans had been made. They ask about your pregnancy, which you were happy to answer, but one of Georgia’s older relatives - quite rudely - asks why you’re alone on Thanksgiving. You’re taken aback at the question, and before you can even remotely five some sort of answer, Beth quickly steps in and shuts down the relative with an overenthusiastic smile. You still feel queasy and just...not right.
You wish you could drink that bottle of wine you brought.
By the time the food is ready, you feel worse, and you try your best, but you just can’t eat. Your stomach isn’t settling, and you’re having terrible Braxton Hicks; the worst you’ve ever felt. And the rude relative, whose name is still escaping you, is still looking at you with judgement on her face. You swallow what you can, but once everyone starts talking about dessert, you have to decline.
“I’m sorry, Beth, I’m not...I’m not feeling that great,” you mumble to your best friend after dinner, following her with some dishes into the kitchen, your almost full plate at the top of the pile.
“Is it because of what Aunt Rose said? Because you can ignore her, she still thinks Reagan is president,” Beth said, rolling her eyes as you both place the plates down by the sink.
You shake your head quickly, taking a step back, wincing a little at yet another tightening in your abdomen. “No, no, it’s not that. Really. I just don’t feel very well. I think I’m gonna go home.”
“Are you sure?” Beth asks, her brow furrowed at you. “I can drive you home if you’re not up for it.”
“I’m fine, really. I’m not too far.”
Beth looks at you with a little uncertainty before nodding. “Okay.”
You give a small sigh through your nose as you try and give her a smile. “I really appreciate what you’ve done for me today. Really. I would have been sat at home, sulking and feeling sorry for myself otherwise.”
“You’re too badass to do that,” Beth said before giving you a hug. “Get home safe.”
“I’ll let you know when I’m home,” you say, giving Beth a final squeeze before you let her go.
After grabbing your coat, you say goodbye to Georgia and thank her again for the dinner. She insists you take some of the Diet Coke they had in the fridge, and eventually, leave, a box of cans in your hands. You place them in your car, but you take a moment to leave against the frame, taking a few deep breaths as more Braxton Hicks hit you.
“Come on, you’re fine,” you mutter to yourself, trying to keep the vomit down. “It’s just practice contractions; you’ve dealt with them before. The books said they’ll be more frequent around now.”
You eventually make it into your car and drive home. You don’t bother carrying the box of cans up to your apartment, opting to leave them in the car. You slowly make your way to your apartment, sighing in relief at you close the door behind you. Although not as comfortable as it once was, since you had started packing some of your stuff away for the move in a few weeks, your apartment was still your safe space, and right now, you needed to relax. You send Beth a text, thanking her again for inviting you to Thanksgiving, and apologising for leaving so early.
Then you strip and run yourself a bath, tossing your phone by the sink. You go all out, using candles and bubble bath, and some pregnancy safe bath salts that Courtney had gifted you. You sigh as you sink into the warm water, closing your eyes and slowly stroking your bump. The twins were quiet, not kicking as much, but maybe because the Braxton Hicks don’t feel as intense as you settle into the water, letting the bubbles float around you, the floral aromas from the salt filling the air.
You must have dozed off, because when you open your eyes again, most of the bubbles had gone, and the water was considerably cooler. You sigh as you sit up and check the time on your phone. Yup, an hour had passed since you got home. You groan as you climb out the bath and grab a towel. You wrap it around yourself, then make your way to your bedroom. You get into your pyjamas, fully intending on crawling into bed and sleeping the rest of Thanksgiving away.
However, as you turn to get into your bed, you wince again as there’s another tightening in your abdomen; so much so that you stop yourself again, having to lean against your chest of drawers.
It’s fine. It’s normal. There’s not enough room for them both, so I will feel more uncomfortable.
“I just need sleep,” you mutter to yourself.
After a few more deep breaths, you climb into bed, leaning against your headboard as you stare at your bump. They were still quiet in there. You poke at your belly, trying to prompt a reaction. The twins were usually so active at this time, when you’re about to go to bed. It was as if they knew you would be going to sleep, and they decide to have a party in your uterus.
You find yourself caught in the web of overthinking, a maze of thoughts that seem to have no end. Anxiousness creeps in like a silent intruder, casting shadows over your mind. Every thought, no matter how trivial, becomes a tangled mess of possibilities. The more you try to untangle the threads, the more they seem to multiply, creating a web of uncertainty.
The weight of uncertainty is bearing down on you, and the fear of making the wrong choice paralyses your ability to think logically. Your mind refuses to quiet down as you wonder what was going on.
You take in a shaky breath, before closing your eyes and counting to ten, twice. You try not to worry. You’ve been overthinking a lot, and you’re not feeling fantastic. They might just be feeling your uneasiness, about the holidays, about Santi, about your family. And you’d been socialising a lot with new people; maybe you just needed a break.
Yeah. You just need a break. Maybe you could look into a ‘babymoon’, something Gabrielle had desperately wanted but Matthew couldn’t get the time off work, for both Theodore and Luna. Maybe you could take her along. Or would Santi want to go? It would make more sense to take Santi. But was that too forward? Too…couple-y?
You’re overthinking again.
With a one final pat to your bump, you send a final text, telling Santi goodnight, and you hope he’s had a good Thanksgiving with his sisters and their families. He sends you back a goodnight, and that he’ll see you when he gets back. He also mentioned his sisters were excited to meet you and become Tías. You smiled at the thought; at least Santi’s family were excited about your pregnancy.
You put your phone on the side table, closing your eyes and letting sleep overcome you.
However, hours later, you wake violently, gasping loudly at the pain. You sit in your bed for a moment, hands on your bump as you take a few breaths, before letting out a small cry at another rush of pain. No, something was wrong. You needed to go to the hospital.
Shakily, you turn on your bedside lamp, and the room was illuminated in a warm glow. You throw back the covers and let out another loud cry at the sight of the blood on the sheets, and between your legs.
I should have gone earlier; I shouldn’t have waited.
You go to stand, but the pain was too much. You let out a sob as you grip your abdomen, leaning forward as you try and breathe. You reach out blindly for your phone, not really checking the time, before you scroll through your contacts and finding Beth’s number. You quietly sob as you wait for her to answer, the phone ringing out, feeling like a lifetime.
When you were about to give up, she answers with a groggy, “Hello?”
“H-hi,” you sob. “I’m s-s-so sorry i-it's late, and - “
“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” she asks, suddenly alert. You can hear shuffling on the other end of the phone.
You sob again. “There’s some-s-something wrong, I-I-I need the hospital.”
“We’ll be there in five minutes, stay on the phone with me, okay? Don’t move.”
You give a shaky “okay,” down the phone. Everything sounds fuzzy as you focus on the pain, almost frozen to your place in your bed. You vaguely hear Beth talking to Georgia down the phone, sounding frantic, and you can soon hear the sound of a car engine. All you can do is nod as Beth talks down the phone to you. You were shaking, both in pain and at the sight of the blood seeping into the sheets.
They were tainted. You need to throw them out.
True to her word, Beth soon arrived, using her spare key to your apartment to let herself and Georgia in. You hang up your phone, but you don’t feel all there when Beth is kneeling down in front of you, talking to you gently as Georgia goes around your room, you’re assuming she’s packing a bag for you.
“Let’s get you cleaned up, okay?” Beth asks, gently taking your hands and lifting you from the bed. You hear her hiss through her teeth at the sheets.
You let out another loud sob. “Is it bad?”
“No, honey, it’s not a lot, okay? It just took me by surprise. Don’t worry about it right now, okay, let’s just get you to the hospital.”
You nod, and you let her guide you to your bathroom, where Georgia had tossed in some clean clothes. You luckily had some pads still sat in your medicine cabinet, so Beth situated one in your underwear.
Georgia knocked on the door, but didn’t come in. “I packed a bag. I have a change of clothes and your phone and charger, some slippers. I can pack your toothbrush and a towel. Do you need anything else?”
“N-no, no. Thank you,” you say.
Beth grabs your toothbrush and a towel and tosses them to Georgia before turning back to you. “Come on, we’ll get in my car.”
You sob again, looking at her as tears stream down your face. “What if - “
“Let’s not think about ‘what if’s right now, okay? Let’s talk to a doctor.”
You make it to Beth’s car, slowly and carefully, and soon you’re on the way to the hospital. You're still cramping, but the pain wasn’t getting any worse. You can hear Beth talking to Georgia but you’re not sure what about before Beth turns to you. “Do you want me to call Santi?”
Oh God, Santi. What do you say to him? You didn’t want to worry him. It’s almost four in the morning, he’s probably asleep. You don’t want to impose on his time with his family, especially since he’s not seen them for so long. He’s five hours away, and you could just see him speeding down the highway in that stupid truck of his.
“No, no, I don’t want to worry him,” you say, shaking your head.
Beth sternly says your name, causing you to look at her with wide eyes. “These are his children. He needs to know.”
“He’s five hours away, Beth, what am I supposed to do? I’ll ruin his Thanksgiving!”
“You are not ruining anything,” Beth says sternly. “I know you’re scared, and you feel like you need to handle this on your own and not be a burden, but you’re not alone. You’re not a burden. Now do you want me to call Santi?”
You look at her, fresh tears pooling in your eyes. You suck in your lips and nod wordlessly.
“Okay,” Beth said, digging in your bag for your phone. She knew your passcode and had no problem getting to your contacts. After a few moments, she puts the phone to her ear. It takes a while, and Santi doesn’t answer. Beth leaves him a message, introducing herself and giving him a quick rundown of the situation. She ends the voicemail with telling him to call back as soon as he could.
Beth continues to calm you with soft words and promises that you’ll get through this, that you’re not alone and they were there for you.
All you could do was nod at her.
You arrive soon at the hospital, Beth clambering out the car before Georgia could even stop the car. Beth helped you out gently as Georgia grabbed your bag, and the two brought you through to the front desk, where the nurse behind the station didn’t even hesitate to call in a doctor and get you a wheelchair as Beth spouted off what was wrong.
You were wheeled off to obstetrics and gynaecology and placed into an examination room. You settle yourself in the bed as a redheaded doctor, a woman, comes into the room with a dark-haired nurse, also a woman, and introduces themselves as Dr Montgomery and Alisha, as they set up some bands around your bump. Dr Montgomery asks you what happened, and you fill her in as best as you could, telling her that the twins weren’t moving as much and when the pains started, you had bled. Beth had to take over a few times as it becomes too much for you, her hand tightly squeezing yours. You weren’t sure how long you’d been holding it.
Dr Montgomery nods and writes it down on her clipboard before she gives you a gentle look. “Has anything like this happened before?”
You shake your head. “N-no. I’ve not had any issues before.”
“And this is your first pregnancy?”
You nod again.
Dr Montgomery nodded, writing down the notes before she gives you another smile. “We’ll monitor your tightenings, and we’ll examine the bleeding. We’ll also schedule in an ultrasound and take a look at your babies, okay?”
Dr Montgomery was nice. She had a kind smile, and she was calm, and you felt safe. You nod at her. “Okay.”
Dr Montgomery looked at Beth and Georgia. “Are you two...”
“We’re her friends,” Beth answered. “Her family is out of state, and the father is visiting family for Thanksgiving.”
You appreciate Beth keeping a level head and not going into too much detail.
Dr Montgomery nodded. “Usually we only allow family, but we’ll let it slide for now. Although one of you might have to leave later today.”
“’I’ll go,” Georgia said. “I have my family at home anyway, I’ll need to keep them busy when they wake up.”
“I’m so sorry – “
“Stop apologising,” Beth said, giving you a stern look. “This isn’t something you can control, okay? It’s not your fault.”
Georgia nodded, placing your bag on the chair. “Keep me posted, okay?” she gives Beth a kiss, and then leans down to give you a tight hug before pulling away and telling Beth she’ll text her later before leaving.
Alisha checks the monitor on the babies’ movements, before nodding and looking at Dr Montgomery. “Movements detected; we’ll monitor over the next hour.”
“Good,” said Dr Montgomery before turning to you. “Are you okay with me examining you?”
“I don’t have a choice,” you say.
Beth gave your hand another squeeze.
“Okay,” Dr Montgomery said before talking to Alisha, before they examine you.
It was intrusive, and painful. You hated every second of it, and you sobbed even more, not knowing what was going on and what was happening to your babies.
“Everything will be okay,” Beth whispered to you. “It might not seem like it now, but it will be.”
“How heavy was the flow?” Dr Montgomery asked.
“I…uh…I don’t know,” you say, your breathing shaking a little. “I didn’t…it was enough for me to panic.”
Dr Montgomery nodded before she appeared from your legs. “Well, it looks like it’s subsided. We’ll come back in an hour and check out your states. In the meantime, I’ll arrange an ultrasound.”
“Thank you, Dr Montgomery,” Beth said, giving a closed lipped smile as Dr Montgomery and Alisha walked out the room.
You throw your arm over your eyes and lay back on the bed, trying to calm your breathing again as your heart thuds heavily in your chest.
“Hey, don’t panic, okay? We’re here now, Dr Montgomery is gonna look after you.”
You couldn’t answer her. Now that you were here, laying in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors, it all became very overwhelming. You sobbed quietly, Beth holding your hand before leaning over and holding you, letting you cry into her shoulder. She strokes your hair, and murmurs comforting words as she lets you sob loudly, soaking her jacket with tears. Beth says nothing about it.
After a while, you lift your head, and wipe at your eyes. “I got snot on your jacket.”
She snorts in amusement. “I’ve had worse on me.”
“I don’t want to know,” you say, giving a weak chuckle, tears still slowly running down your cheeks.
Beth gives you a light swat on the arm, giving her own small laugh before passing you a tissue from your bedside cabinet. You take it gratefully before wiping your face. You both go into a lull, listening to the general sounds of the hospital room.
Beth is first to break the silence. “What do you want me to tell the others?”
You shake your head. “Nothing, yet.” you take a deep breath. “I feel awful. Physically and emotionally.”
“You don’t have to share if you don’t want to. Not right now.”
You merely nod at her, before going silent again.
You manage to get some sleep, but it wasn’t long after that Dr Montgomery comes back to check on you. She checks you over, and is glad to say the bleeding had stopped, and the monitors have detected that there has been a decrease in tightenings, and the babies seem to be moving a little more.
“But I would still like to get an ultrasound,” she had said.
It was arranged for 9am, which gave you a few hours to rest. You told Beth she could go home, but she told you to not ‘be silly’, that she was ‘going to stay right here’. You were thankful for her support.
Santi eventually calls just before you go for the ultrasound, when Alisha was setting you up in a wheelchair.
You answer the phone after Beth passes it over. “Santi - “
“What happened? Are you okay? Are the babies okay?” he throws question after question at you, and you barely can get a word in until he calms down.
“I had a scare,” you tell him gently. “I’m in the hospital now, about to go for a scan. Dr Montgomery is positive that everything is okay - “
“Shit, I can be there in...if I go faster than the speed limit, I can get there in a few hours - “
“Santiago, do not kill yourself trying to get down here.”
“I’m leaving right now,” he says, and you can hear him shuffling in the background; he must be packing his bag. “I can be there in five hours, okay?”
“Santi, listen to me,” you say. “You don’t...you don’t need to come down, okay?”
Beth’s eyes widen at you, but you wave her off.
“It’s Thanksgiving, you haven’t seen your sisters for years, I...you don’t need to come.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone for a while before he finally asks, “Do you want me there?”
Your heart breaks. He sounded so unsure. “Santi, of course I do - “
“Then let me be there,” he says. “These are my kids. This is you.”
You bite your lip before nodding. “Okay,” you whisper. “I’m sorry.”
“This isn’t your fault,” he says. “I need you to know that.”
You talk a little more, asking how his Thanksgiving was (“How are you asking me that right now?”), and what else he had planned for the day (“Nothing, I'm coming home to be with you.”). You felt lighter talking to him, that he didn’t blame you for what happened, that he was just happy to hear that you were in the hospital and getting checked out. You told him to prepare for bad news, if Dr Montgomery found anything.
“If anything comes back...bad,” he starts. “Then...we’ll deal with it. We’ll make a plan.”
You hesitated for a moment before muttering back the affirmative. You wanted everything to be okay. You needed everything to be okay. You needed these babies healthy, and happy.
"I have to go,” you say to him.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can, okay?” he says to you.
“Okay. Bye, Santi.”
“I’ll see you soon, cariño.”
You hang up the phone with a shaky breath before handing it back to Beth, who placed it back in your bag. “Is he coming?” she asks.
You nod. “Yeah, he’s leaving his sister’s now.”
Beth nods. “Good,” she says, before you both turn to look at the door as it opens, and Dr Montgomery steps through.
Dr Montgomery smiles softly at you from your place in your wheelchair. “Are you ready?”
Tagged - @khonsulockley, @bluenredndeath, @superficialfeelings, @othersideoftheparadise, @beezusvreeland
#triple frontier#santiago garcia x reader#santiago x reader#santiago garcia#oscar isaac#pregnant!reader#santiago garcia x f!reader
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My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 4
Author's note: On this chapter there are some things that give away that this story was written a long time ago, like the fact that it says that he is City's captain... Or that he dresses well 😅 P.S. I'm joking, please no one get mad at me 😭
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Masterlist
"Did you sleep well, darling? You look tired" grandma asked me the morning after the game.
"It probably was all the excitement from yesterday. She was still buzzing like young people say" grandad laughed.
"I think it was a mix of not being on my own bed and getting out of my comfort zone. I'm not used to it."
Which was a lie. Mostly. I did miss my own bed, the one at my grandparents' house had the worst pillow ever. But if I looked dead and tired, it was because I had stayed up until 2 am reading about Rúben, watching his videos and looking at his photos.
Some would call it stalking. I call it doing research.
I read about his career, watched proper interviews and other videos where he was being silly, finding myself smiling like the idiot I am. I even watched some in Portuguese, the fact that I speak Spanish being very helpful to understand what he was saying. Or at least half of it.
I spent an hour just on his Instagram account, looking at everything he had posted, and especially the posts where he was topless. Like... He couldn't be real. He couldn't have a body like that, it had to be Photoshop. And it wasn't just the abs and the biceps. It also was his back. His legs. Everything. And judging by the photos where he was wearing clothes and the couple of times I had met him, he also knew how to dress and make the most out of that perfect body of his, which was unfair for the rest of the human population, both male and female.
I also spent a lot of time reading fanfic about him. There are so many talented people out there! And horny, which made me feel less alone. Because my dreams... Well. They were similar to the ones I had been having since meeting him for the first time, but now I knew what was under his clothes, and they weren't happening just on the lift or Lucy's house. Now that I knew that he was a freaking professional football player, there were so many new scenarios to explore... And I explored a few last night, like the changing room at the Emirates.
"Darling, are you sure you are alright? Should I take you to the doctor?" grandad said, bringing me back to reality.
"To the doctor? Why?"
"You look... I don't know. Off. And look at your cheeks."
"My cheeks?" I said, touching them. They were feeling very warm.
"Let me take your temperature" grandma said. "I don't want you traveling alone back to Manchester with a fever."
Oh, if only she knew.
I wasn't traveling back to Manchester with a fever. I was actually traveling back to Manchester to meet the cause of my fever. And just the thought of it was making my stomach do funny things, not sure if good or bad ones.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━
"Oh, c'mon!" I said when the shopping bag slipped from my hand as I reached to call for the lift, all its contents slipping on the floor.
"Let me help you with that" a male voice said behind me. No. Not just a male voice. The male voice. Rúben.
"You don't need to, I can manage."
"And I want to help" he said, already picking some things from the floor. "Doesn't Lucy have someone to do the shopping for her?"
"Yes, but that's the weekly shopping. This is different."
"I can tell. I don't see Lucy letting Julia eat so much chocolate and sweets" he chuckled.
"Tonight we are having a movie night, that's why I bought all this. I'm not planning on feeding her just sugar for the whole weekend, I'm not crazy."
"Good to know" Rúben smiled. "What movie are you watching?" he asked while calling for the lift, the shopping bag on his hand.
"Not sure yet. Something from Disney I guess."
"What's your favourite Disney movie?"
"What?"
"Mine is "Aladdin". Love the songs" he said, walking into the lift once the doors had opened.
"I'm not sure about mine" I said, following him. "As a child I loved watching the "Swan Princess", but that isn't Disney."
"I think I've never heard of it before. Is it cartoons?"
"Yep. It is about a princess who is under a spell that turns her into a swan during the day, and at night she goes back into her human self but only if she is on a certain lake and when the moon is shining."
"Do they sing?"
"Oh, yes, they do. They have great songs."
"I'll have to check it out."
"What?" I laughed.
"Don't tell anyone, but I love watching kids' movies."
"Worried your teammates may bully you?" I chuckled as the lift's doors opened at our floor.
"Nah, they already know. By the way, the Emirates was the last place where I expected to see you" Rúben said, walking towards my door.
"Same."
"Lucy hadn't told you?"
"We've never talked about you." Which is true. But mainly because I knew my face would give away that I am very attracted to Rúben. Like, a lot.
"Now that you know... What do you think about it?"
"I don't know" I said, opening the apartment’s door. "It's just a job. A special one, but a job."
"Your opinion about me hasn't changed then?" he asked, following me inside and into the kitchen.
"Why would I change my mind?"
"You know what they say about football players. Just a bunch of idiots that kick a ball, who earn way too much money, who just party and cheat on their wives... Those things."
"I don't know enough about you to judge."
"Then we must do something about that" he said, leaving the shopping bag on the table. "Do you think Julia would mind if I joined you on your movie night?"
"I'm sorry, you want what?"
"It'll be a way to get to know each other a bit better. And I don't have plans tonight, so watching a Disney movie in good company sounds great."
I don't know what happened after that, what I said or did. Probably that yes, that he could come, because I remembered his smile and a "see you tonight." But my brain was stuck on his previous two last sentences.
For some reason, he wanted to get to know me better. Me. And I apparently was good company? He could have said it just about Julia, he clearly adored her. But he wasn't talking about her. We weren't talking about her. So... It was about me, right? I was good company. Did that mean that he was flirting with me? Rúben Dias, Manchester City captain and international player with Portugal, was flirting with me? The piano teacher turned into nanny?
It had been years since a guy had tried to flirt with me, I was very rusty. So maybe he was just being nice and I understood everything wrong. Or maybe not.
Whatever it was, I would be finding out in just a few hours...
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The (only) one I love (Martin Ødegaard x Reader, ft Rúben Dias)
**After posting this Rúben imagine, I got a request to do something similar but with Ødegaard. And this is what I came up with. There is a little Rúben cameo and...he might not be that great in this story but oh well 😅 enjoy!! ❤️**
Word count: 2887
Masterlist
Wattpad
Jealousy was a very bad companion. It was an irrational feeling that made people say and do very stupid things. No one wanted to feel jealous. And yet…
“You’re going to Manchester?”
“Yes. Just for the weekend”, you said, not noticing the way Martin looked at you. “It’d be fun to see everyone”.
“Sure”.
“You ok? Worried you’ll miss me too much?”, you teased.
“Yeah, that’s it”.
Even if Martin’s smile didn’t convince you fully that it was only that, you let it slide. It was true that you hadn’t spent that much time together lately but you really needed some time away to catch up with your friends and that work trip was a great option to do just that.
Your year studying abroad in Lisbon turned into a job at Benfica, which then led you to your job at City. There, your good relationship with Mikel Arteta made you take his offer of working with him at Arsenal. You were extremely happy in London but you missed Manchester. And especially, the Portuguese boys. You had already worked with Rúben when he still played for Benfica. And once at City, you became friends with Bernardo almost as easily.
The season had been a strange one for you. Arsenal were doing so well but City was always behind, ready to take any opportunity to go back to the top of the table. It was sort of ideal in a way. If Arsenal won, your team won. But if they didn’t, your former team would win. Your friends would win.
Someone who didn’t see it that way was Martin. Even if you had an unspoken rule of not dating players, once you met Martin, that rule banished. You were charmed by his personality the second you talked to him and you already thought he was really cute before meeting him in person, so…
“Let’s go to the match!”
Once you got to the stadium, it was time to separate from Martin. He had been pretty quiet on the ride to the stadium but you didn’t worry much about it. It wasn’t that unusual for him to be like that.
“Good luck, my love”, you said, kissing him and hugging him tightly. You knew how nervous he got before matches and how much your good wishes meant to him.
Despite all the silly thoughts in his mind, your hug made him relax. You were there with him. And he trusted you. There was no reason to be jealous. And yet…
**
Another bad result for Arsenal, while City kept winning all of their matches, meant Martin was pretty upset after the match. He loved being a captain, even if he was still so young. But bad results were harder to digest because of that extra responsibility.
He was waiting for you to be done with work, sitting inside the car, lost in thoughts of what could have been done better.
"Hey!"
Hearing your voice made him turn his body completely to hug you. You barely had time to sit down but didn't mind. Martin needed you.
"Please don't go to Manchester", he muttered against your neck.
"Why?"
He looked up realising he had said that out loud. He couldn't tell you about his jealousy. You wouldn't understand. And it wouldn't be fair to you, because you had done nothing wrong.
"I just…I need you here with me".
"I can come back a day earlier but I need to go. There's work stuff that I need to do there".
"Of course. I'm just being stupid and needy. Stay there as long as you want to".
He shook his head and got ready to drive but you took his hand to stop him.
"Is there anything else you want to say?"
"No", he smiled. "Let's go home".
**
"This is ridiculous", whispered Martin, putting his phone down and his hands on his face.
"What's wrong, bro?", asked Bukayo when he saw his captain's actions.
"I'm stupid. That's what's wrong".
"You're not. Did you see something on your phone that upset you? Is your family ok?"
"Yeah, they are good, don't worry. It's just…", he didn't know how to say it without sounding silly so he took the phone and showed Bukayo.
"I don't get…oh. Don't be jealous, mate. She'd never do that".
"I know", he sighed. "That's why I feel stupid. But look at the comments".
Bukayo did and understood his teammate a bit better. So many people talking about what a great couple you and Rúben Dias made. On a previous post with photos of you two, even one of Rúben's friends commented about it…and Rúben liked the post. Martin couldn't stand it anymore. But he couldn't ask you to stop being friends with him. It wasn't fair.
By the time you got back from Manchester, Martin had convinced himself that not looking at any of your posts was the best idea. He was the type of boyfriend who always liked your posts and left some sort of comment. Even if it was just a heart emoji. So people noticed the change but he didn't care.
"Honey, I'm home!"
You didn't even have time to fully close the door before Martin got there and lifted you to hug you.
"Missed me?"
"Barely", he joked before kissing you. "I thought we could go out for dinner. But if you're tired, I can cook or order something".
"Let's order. I'm shattered. I just want to shower, put on my pajamas and cuddle with my favourite boy".
"That's a good plan", he said, smiling and pecking your lips again.
Martin's smile didn't leave his face while he walked with you to your room. But then you took your hoodie off and he saw it wasn't one he had seen before.
"Did you go shopping while in Manchester?"
"No. Why? Did you expect a souvenir?"
He laughed at your joke, still looking at the hoodie. "Where did this come from then?"
"Rúben", you said, casually. "I was clumsy enough to get sauce on my jacket so he gave me his hoodie to wear".
"That's nice of him".
You smiled at your boyfriend before getting inside the shower, not seeing his face. Not guessing all the thoughts that were going through his mind at that moment.
**
The weeks passed and it was time for Martin's most dreaded match. City at the Etihad.
"Hello traitor", he heard someone say when he was on his way to the dressing room. And he knew that voice.
When he turned to look at Rúben, he saw you hugging him and laughing. He would have stared for hours but a slap on his back woke him up from his daydreaming of how he could murder a Portuguese defender.
"Hey, good to see you", said Erling.
"Yeah, same".
But Martin kept looking in your direction and Erling noticed.
"Who's that?"
"My girlfriend".
"Right…I heard about her. She used to work here".
Martin nodded, hearing your laugh he loved so much but that he couldn't enjoy now because of who was the reason you were laughing.
"I better go. Good luck".
"Good luck to you too".
Martin started to walk faster and you noticed him leaving without getting his good luck hug.
"I need to go. See you later", you told Rúben before sprinting after your boyfriend.
The door to the dressing room closed behind him and you knew you couldn't get inside. The players knew you and probably wouldn't mind but you wanted to respect their privacy. So when you saw another player walking towards the door, you knew it was your best chance.
"Aaron, can you tell Martin to come out for a second?"
"It's time for the coach's talk but then we'll go out again to warm up".
"Yes, but I need to go to work myself and I have to tell him something important…".
"Ok".
Checking your phone you noticed you couldn't wait there longer than 5 minutes. But luckily, the door opened again and it was Martin who got out.
"Hey, I didn't get to wish you good luck".
"No, you were too busy".
"What does that even mean?"
"I have to go back inside. The captain can't miss the team talk".
"Are you mad at me?"
No, he was mad at himself.
"Martin…".
"We'll talk later".
None of you could concentrate well on your jobs after that. And every city goal only made the situation worse.
After the match, a lot of City players surrounded their former teammate Zinchenko. But you were surrounded only by two City players, Rúben and Bernardo.
"Who's going to win the league, then?", laughed Bernardo. You had been joking about it all season.
"I don't care", you said and they were surprised by the way you reacted.
"Don't be a sore loser", said Rúben, putting his arm around your shoulders. And when you looked up, you saw Martin looking at you two. And finally, finally, you understood why he behaved the way he did sometimes. Why he had behaved the way he did before the match.
Focusing on work was the best option for you and that's what you did. By the time you got to the plane, you hadn't talked to Martin and you planned on doing that when you got home. The last thing you needed was to make a scene in front of your bosses.
"Are you going to talk to me or just acting like a child is enough for you today?"
"You don't get it".
"I do, Martin. I do now. You're jealous of Rúben, which is the stupidest thing…".
"Is it stupid? Ask him if it’s stupid! I trust you but I don't trust him at all".
"So I can't be friends with men then?", he was being so ridiculous…you couldn't believe it. He wasn't like that normally.
"You're friends with my Arsenal teammates and it's fine. You're friends with Silva too and it's fine. But Dias…he likes you. Don't deny it".
"If you trusted me as much as you say you do, that wouldn't matter".
Martin noticed you didn't deny his claim. And he really hoped you would.
"I do, but it's hard. Put yourself in my shoes for a second".
Seeing his defeated look took some of your anger away. So you took his hand and walked with him to the sofa so you could sit and talk.
"Why is it hard? Explain it to me".
And so he started to name all the things that had made him jealous in the past, worried you'd laugh at him.
"And then they have to play against Madrid and you want them to win too, writing about it on social media".
"So? Why can't I support City in the Champions League? I won't next year when you play it".
"I played for Madrid. People talked about how my girlfriend was talking about wanting them to lose".
"They treated you like shit. People can't expect me to like them…".
"I guess", he sighed.
"What else?"
"Do you read the comments on your posts?"
That surprised you. Did he? You never did because being a woman in a male centric industry meant you got a lot of abuse on social media. So the best thing you could do was ignore all comments.
"No, why?"
"So you don't see how people ship you and Rúben every time you post about the other or when you interact in the comments"
"That's so stupid. I post a lot with Bernardo too. Why don't they ship me with him then?"
"He's in a relationship".
"So am I".
"Yeah…they don't care about that, apparently".
"Do you get comments about it?"
He nodded, picking up his phone and going to the last photo of you he posted. You read the comments and couldn't believe it. All the cheating accusations under your comment were bad enough. But all those comments about you and Rúben being a better couple…
"You should have told me earlier".
"And look like the idiot I am? I told you, I trust you. But it can be too much. He's taking my league title but he can't take you too".
"He won't".
You understood. And most importantly, you believed him when he said he trusted you.
After your talk, you two cuddled on the sofa. He needed you to be there for him and you needed to reassure him.
Between the match, the travelling and your argument, he was exhausted and fell asleep quickly. You moved him gently so his head could be on your lap and took your phone out and took a photo of him. He looked adorable.
Because of the argument, you hadn't had time to go through Instagram after the match. And you didn't know why, but you felt the need to go to your tagged photos.
One of the first you saw was of you and Rúben hugging. A City fan page had posted it and Rúben liked it. You were about to move to the next when the caption caught your attention.
"Please City, bring her back to the team so these two can be together. Dream couple! 😍"
Rúben like that? You definitely needed to talk to him but you couldn't tell Martin. He didn't need to see more comments like that. He was right when he said it was too much. You could only imagine how painful it would be to see those types of posts about him and another woman.
Looking down at him, you felt the need to do something. And so you opened the Instagram app again and posted the photo you took of Martin sleeping with his head on your lap on your stories.
"The (only) one I love 💕"
#martin odegaard#ruben dias#martin odegaard imagine#martin odegaard fluff#martin odegaard one shot#martin odegaard angst#footballer imagine#footballer fluff#footballer one shot#footballer x reader#footballer x yn#footballer angst#martin ødegaard
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@runnning-outof-time - for your "Caught in 4K" Celebration
A little Tommy & Charlie fluffy happiness.
Tommy had been spending too much time in London, too much time at the Garrison, too much time away from home, and every time he turned around he swore his boy had grown an inch or more. It was time that he let his brothers and Polly run things for a few days and took Charlie out to the country. Just he and his son, be the father that he never had. It was the one thing he swore he’d do when Charlie was born and he knew he’d been woefully neglectful of it. However, it was never too late to start, and he’d made a promise to Polly to do better and if anyone could ride his ass to do it, it was Polly.
So, with bags packed, the car loaded, and Charlie just about bouncing out of said car, they pulled out of the drive and onto the main road that would take them out to the Shelby hunting cabin. Now, the Shelby cabin was not like what most people would imagine a hunting cabin. It was far from rustic and was always kept well stocked in case any of them needed to get away from the city for any reason. It was just the place for a “boys weekend” for Tommy and his favorite boy.
As expected, once they were on the road, Charlie passed out in the passenger seat of the car and didn’t wake up again until they had arrived at the cabin. It made Tommy chuckle, but there was something about watching his sleeping son that tugged at the tough gangster’s heart. The boy was innocent, but he looked especially like an angel when he was curled up asleep. There was no length he would not go to in order to keep the boy safe; no depth he would not plunge to in order to ensure that the life that he lived never even came near to touching him.
Once Tommy had pulled the car to a stop in front of the cabin, Charlie was awake in an instant and peppering his father with a thousand questions on what they were going to do. Could they feed the ducks? Would they fish? Could they go for a walk? Did he think the black cat was still out in the barn? Could they tell stories under the stars? Did he have to wear shoes? Tommy wasn’t sure how his son was even taking breaths. All he could do was laugh and shake his head as he got his son, and then their bags, out of the car and headed inside.
Anyone who has ever tried to keep a small child inside on a beautiful, sunny day knows that it is an impossible task, and being a powerful gangster gives you no more influence over a child than anyone else. So, before Tommy could turn around, Charlie was sprinting off towards the lake. He knew how to take advantage of a turned back, much to his father’s chagrin. Which meant that Tommy was off and chasing the giggling boy towards the lake. Thankfully, Tommy was faster than his son and did not end up with a wet child in addition to a feisty one.
Once he had the boy’s small hand in his much larger one, they decided to take a walk around the property. They found that the cat did live in the barn, and that it had apparently had a litter of kittens since the last time that they were out there. One of said kittens ended up touring the rest of the property with them. The ducks were happily swimming in the lake, and there were several spots that were perfect to be able to lay out a blanket and look up at the stars to be able to tell bedtime stories. As long as there wasn’t rain, they might even be able to camp out one night if Charlie was very, very good.
Other than trying to sneak the kitten into the cabin later, Charlie made sure he was on his best behavior. More than once Tommy caught him trying to mimic his behavior, saying that he wanted to be “just like daddy”. It hit Tommy in the heart. Maybe he wasn’t doing so bad as a dad after all. Only time would tell, but if that round little face staring up at him like he was the best thing in the world was any indication, all hope wasn’t lost yet.
@evita-shelby @cillmequick @call-sign-shark @look-at-the-soul @zablife @raincoffeeandfandoms
#writeblr#peaky blinders#peaky blinder fanfic#peaky blinder imagine#tommy shelby#thomas shelby#charlie shelby#i tried#my writing
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