#and that's when aim came to be
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Dude I actually have SO many discarded fankid designs like Emmie has gone by three different friend groups and even for the current lineup there have been some forgotten kiddos you guys actually have no idea how many fankids I've designed NSKXBSKXBKX
#and yet emmie has survived all of this#maybe that's why she has changed the most#because the rest i just dumped JSODJSKDNSKX#no but like#at first i created a group of four kids#there was a knouge kid in there for those who keep insisting for one#i actually dont like these pairings#and so emmie was the one survivor who was joined by sparks#and then with emmie and sparks i made ANOTHER GROUP#which i think consisted of six fankids???#and that's when aim came to be#the other three kids are gone#AND THERE WAS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT A SALLICOLE KID#her name was techna but looking back destiny is definitely a better character lol#ALSO YEA I DESIGNED AIM WAAAAY BEFORE LASH#lash i designed on her own#then i decided to post aim make him go public BAHBSKZBSKX#and then i created bria tulip and destiny all on their own#AND THEN WHEN DESIGNING SPADES SHE WAS ACTUALLY PART OF A WAVE#she was designed next to two other characters who were later dumped#then i designed another kid that i lost their design -cries- and im not sure if i should actually add them???#and ive been designing some other kids but i dont think ill post them#maybe one??? they're too cute i don't know im tempted#i don't know if they even count as a fankid tho lol#but yeah i just felt like rambling about this BAHZBAHXBSKXNS#shale and mareep aren't the only forgotten kids/hj
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aang when he says "the monks taught us" katara when she says "my grandmother used to tell me" sokka when he says "my dad" zuko when he says "my uncle" toph when. the badgermoles.
#like they all have heros & lineages that they are aiming to follow in tbe footsteps of#including when those footsteps are bucking against the lineage (iroh / zuko)#the tradgedy is that their world has been so devastated that these kids cant 'go back'#they are the masters of a new turning point#aang & katara carrying this burden the most#and then there's toph. who bucks against her family to assert her agency and establishes#a name(s) (blind bandit. the runaway) for herself . as disconcerted from her prominent lineage as she can be#in this way. her starting a metal bending school - creating a lineage of students - fits so well#i feel like if you asked older toph about where she came from#she'd tell you. a cave in a mountain with her teachers the badger moles. ykwim?#r.post
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"Ivan isn't loved by anyone-" You were fooled by his warped perspective.
#now dont piss me off#/silly /maybe#betting on me and tills newborn he was loved#Ivan was loved just not in the way he wanted nor could fathom because of his circumstances. ivan has only ever known and seen romantic love#and by romantic love i mean an unhealthy kind. is the way mizisua love eachother unhealthy? mayb not but the way he took & he saw their#love and aimed to replicate it WAS unhealthy. and in any other case i dont think he understands any other kind of love. platonic. friendly#he can see it objectively. i believe. but#i dont think he gets it. thats why he thinks the way he does. he literally just doesnt understand so it doesnt exist and he doesnt acknowle#it#alien stage#alnst ivan#alien stage ivan#alnst#seeing what mizisua had. im sure he came to the conclusion that if he wasnt good enough to earn that kind of love. then what else is there?#hell ill say it. even Till loved him. not romantically of course. but the love was there. they are childhood friends. he is THE closest to#-Till FOR A REASON. even Ivan knows it. a little. maybe. But if only he gave it a chance when he could.
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also i just have one more thing to say about the movie and then ill probably shut up for now but im really annoyed with how certain people keep going "omg its not supposed to be a sonic adventure 2 movie stop expecting it to be exactly like the game" to shut down any criticism of the trailers... like don't lie to me regardless of how many changes they make it's still very obviously supposed to be a sonic adventure 2 movie theyre taking a lot of plot points from that game and they keep referencing it in the marketing for the movie you have to have never played the game to think its not an sa2 movie
and like. yeah people who were expecting it to be an exact recreation of the game were probably setting themselves up for disappointment but just because it's not supposed to be exactly like the game doesn't mean that every change is justified or that fans of the game aren't allowed to not like it ..?? it's not unreasonable for fans of the games to want to see the stories and characters they love done justice in an adaptation . whatever man
#like i personally am not mad the movie isnt exactly like the game. i was never expecting it to be .#i just think a lot of the changes they made suck and make the story worse and dont feel like they were made with respect for the game#also tired of people going omg stop judging the movie based on one trailer#and then turning around and calling the movie peak cinema based on one trailer ...... ??#and they csnt use that argument anymore at this point but .#saying its gonna be good is judging it based on the trailers too .. ????????#and im sure a lot of those same people hated on the minecraft trailer when it came out around the same time#just admit you cant handle the slightest bit of criticism aimed at the movie and go#also ik sonic 2 wasnt exactly like the game it was adapting either#but again its not the story being changed itself that i dislike its specific decisions they made with sonic 3#but . the classic games dont have much going on in terms of plot#sa2 is one of the more story heavy games and is possibly one of the most loved sonic stories of all time. its not the same situation.
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still baffled that one popular anti-dany argument pre s8 was that since she was wearing black she leaning toward the Dark Side™...... as if in the same series another unambigously heroic protagonist didn't enlist into the night's guard where everyone must wear black, and the series' author wasn't explicitly against this kind of stereotypical tropes lmao
#like mind you the antis were right. this was very much what got was aiming for with her wardrobe#...... but they were SO dumb for this. so incompetent#i can't take it seriously because of all the reasons i mentioned above#it's not simply an anti dany thing; it's anti asoiaf core themes#grrm really put an effort in deconstructing so many simplicistic fantasy tropes (beauty = goodness&ugliness/deformity = evil.#the knight core beliefs - where the truest knight in the 7 kingdoms is an ugly young woman etc.)#what's next? we are supposed to root for the starks because their house colors are grey/WHITE and therefore inherently good? lol#also targaryens' colors are black and red. of course dany was wearing them when she finally came to westeros#a song of ice and fire#game of thrones#got negativity#daenerys targaryen#val speaks#val rambles in the tags#txt
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If you’re sick of tired tropes clap your hands!
👏🏼👏🏼
If you’re sick of overwritten pity parties, clap your hands!
👏🏼👏🏼
If you’re sick of overused tropes, and you just want something new, if you’re sick of tired tropes, CLAP YOUR HANDS!
👏🏼👏🏼
#aimed specifically at dpxdc but also some others#we get it#Jason has pit rage and it calms or ripples when Danny is near and somehow that makes him more interesting#that came out anti-Jason it’s more anti-vivisection found in Gotham Jason takes random stranger to his safe house#also give Bruce just a little bit of characterization#just a smidge#same for Ra’s and Talia and Damian-not in a ‘their writing was racist’ way- in a ‘all characters should have good characterization’ way#no ‘gruff’ does not count as characterization#aimed next at miraculous#spiderman#and bnha#originality#✨✨#dpxdc#danny phantom#dp#dc#miraculous#batfam#this is explicitly not about BBC Merlin and Arthur knows fics#batman#danny fenton#danny phantom crossover#batman and robin#young justice#bruce wayne#tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#tucker foley
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I genuinely do not think Investigations 2 meant to imply that Blaise was physically abusive but when you give me a guy saying "let's go home" and taking a single step towards his son only for that son to full body flinch I am going to draw some conclusions
#I can go either way on Manfred (though I think Franziska's cavalier attitude to violence even aimed at people she likes came from somewhere)#but I can't read Blaise any other way#(speaking of cavalier attitudes towards violence Sebastian sure barely reacts when she shows up and starts hitting him)#ace attorney
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Pocahontas (1995)
#welp. there you have it.#pocahontasedit#pocahontas x john smith#fyeahpocahontas#disneyedit#disneygif#pocahontasgif#pocahontas#john smith#disney pocahontas#disney john smith#pocajohn#this came out soooo much greener than i wanted it to#but my God was this frustrating to color and not have total fuck happening with their skin tones#eventually i just gave up and had to accept this is as good as it was gonna get#queso*edit#queso*gif#u kno what i really dig about this kiss is how it starts off kinda awkward#like it looks a lil uncoordinated. i think john is actually aiming to kiss her cheek here#and so pocahontas has to turn her head to catch his lips like 'no buddy get over here'#and they obviously do some adjusting bc their positions change a lil when we cut back to them#but like it's so slow to begin and then it's like they fall over into it and bam you got one of disney's longest on screen kisses#actual soulmates with an intimacy learning curve my fucking beloveds#pocahontas (1995)
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Monster looks like me
#nightmaretheater#caligosto loboto#<-trust me on this okay#Uh Huh. Mhmmm#I continue to make art aimed specificslly at me because Me When I Know?#was kinda just a scribble i did while reaaalllyy bored.#had to edit it digitally a little because the scan came out wayyyyy too bright
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Mecha anime sure did make the right play when they decided to put cutesy pop music juxtaposed against colossal war machines ripping huge swathes through hoardes of enemies too innumerable to count
It's about the hope, about humanity's desperate fight to stay alive despite overwhelming odds, it's screaming at the top of our lungs THIS MIGHT BE OUR LAST DAY SO PLAY THAT SHIT AND LETS DO OUR BEST!!
#When that first ''Whoo!'' came through during the final in GunBuster I knew it was time to make room in my heart for a new etch on my soul#I haven't been this moved since the last time I was this moved HAHAHAHAHA#GunBuster#aim for the top#super dimension fortress macross#Macross#idols#anime#mecha#Diebuster
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I'm revisiting a part of The High School Survival Guide: Making the Most of the Best Time of Your Life (so far) by Adam Palmer. It's a Christian book despite the fact that the title makes it seem totally areligious, and I read parts of it when I was in high school. It was the first time I ever read about being gay in a book. I found a free version online and while I didn't think the Bible could shock me anymore my mouth dropped open at this:
Apparently the MSG version of this passage really says the quiet part out loud. Gay people aren't even human / lose the knowledge of how to be human. Not sure how that works. There's such a dissonance between the tone of this verse and the tone of the text in the book too.
GEE I WONDER WHY??? How strange that Christians, who believe their sacred text claims that homosexual acts strip people of God, love, and their humanity, view homosexuality as 'icky' and 'gross.' In fact, I would think they'd think much worse in that scenario and treat gay people far worse. In fact, it kinda seems like you're downplaying the absolutely brutal treatment and systemic discrimination of gay people that was carried out in the name of Jesus.
And all of this is being aimed at (presumably Christian) teenagers who think they might be gay. There's no real advice here other than to surrender to god and to seek accountability.
I was keenly aware as a gay Christian that I was at the center of a culture war I did not want to be a part of. People out beyond my religious community were fighting for an acceptance and celebration of homosexuality that I thought was harmful and sinful. People inside my religious community had all kinds of incorrect ideas about gay people and I didn't think there was much space for me to be "out of the closet" even if I stayed single, celibate, and god-fearing. And I had no idea what to do about any of it.
I didn't come out to anyone until after high school. I prayed and I prayed and I prayed, and the weight was still heavy. God did not make it easier, did not lift the burden of homosexuality from me. I had plenty of accountability in my life, constantly watched by helicopter parents with Internet filters, confessing sin regularly in men's groups (both before and after I started to tell people I 'struggled with same-sex attraction). 'Accountability' only served to intensify my shame.
The only time things got easier was when I started to take God out of the equation, when I started to see my sexuality as a part of myself to embrace rather than excise. Christians will drone on and on about how Christ sets people free from their sins. In my experience, to be free of my sin I had to first be free of Christ.
#I thought this book was when I encountered the “actually gay people just have a bad relationship with their same sex parents” argument but#turns out that's not the case#which is not helpful for the other thing I was writing but now im making this post#this book is so crazy too like it really neatly packages the evangelical worldview and aims it at high schoolers#Rereading it is eerie cause it's presenting stuff that's nearly exactly what I believed as a Christian#but it's not like my entire worldview came from this book#I don't remember even reading this book all the way through and I doubt I did#it's just very good at bottling up the theological waters in which I as swimming and serving it to in its simplest form#exvangelical#tw: homophobia#cw: homophobia#homophobia#ex christian#ex fundamentalist#ex fundie#ex religious#apostate#gay exvangelical#religious trauma#shoesofatiredman
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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Janeway in 'Nothing Human' vs Tuvok in 'Resolutions' There's something here I know there is I can almost wrap my teeth around it.
#I can't watch Nothing Human bc the puppet really disconcerts me#but I cannot believe Janeway really came into B'Elanna's room after all that and the FIRST thing she says...her OPENER is#'Wow it smells awful in here~!'#DUDE....................TIME AND PLACE#HEHEHHE#C'MON MAN#B'Elanna: Is [putting it behind us] an order? / Janeway [normal!]: Yes.#'And what emotion is that?' C'MON MAN!!!!!!#Janeway & Tuvok#Kathryn Janeway#Tuvok#I can see why she and Tuvok are friends#'I understand you're upset but fall in line'#You can be upset but not if effects your work#<- Something which would be fine on a regular ship but is very difficult on Voyager#I think Janeway's certain coldness or ruthlessness which can be aimed at either friend or foe is an interesting#aspect of her personality#Ex: She and B'Elanna COULD have feasibly had a more touching scene together to close out the episode but they don't#I don't know if I'm explaining myself well right now I'm a bit ill and more than a bit tired#Something about uhh maybe....people under their command vehemently and emotionally disagreeing with them/their decisions??#you can disagree with me but not if you don't follow me anyway#Voyager a ship full of contradictions#they have to all work together and they are all closer emotionally than any other starship due to their situation#but they are also still 'at work' and are expected to follow orders. It's like a 'casual' hierarchy but it's still a hierarchy#and you can't fall too far out of line bc you're someone dear to me#but you're also a valued cog in the machine#and even though you ARE valued you ARE still a cog in the machine#but you're also my dear friend. and all of these things are true at once.#all of that of course but also Janeway & Tuvok are displaying a very particular kind of shared leadership style in these moments#Janeway is obviously on the whole MUUUCH more charismatic and understanding than Tuvok but still - when push comes to shove...
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forgot about cole cassidy guys.... he was so Eye-Catching to young me (2016)..... he is literally Cowboy..... i wish i was him so bad
#played ow when it came out (i remember the defense class. never forget)#forgot the game existed#then read one (1) hanzo angst fic and now its back#and its only back for hanzo and cassidy.#do people still care about ow here?#nobody told me the fandom had such great ship names? even if i dont partake in shipping i can say they are GREAT#boombox for junkrat and lucio? high boom for junk and cole? mercykill for reaper and mercy???#like i was not expecting that /pos#i only remember the yeehan deadname ship#and pharmercy - which is the best ship name i have ever come across#anyways back to the cowboy#i remember being drawn to him because of his appearance#as a life-long fan of western cowboy stuff it was only natural#not to mention hes voiced by matthew mercer! and that i got into playing dnd after that#honestly wish i could say i main him... but i dont. i cannot aim very well (or... well enough to play dps like him.)#i myself main lucio and sigma but i can appreciate him#maybe ill draw him again.#rivera writes#cowboys#cole cassidy#overwatch
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hi babe im here to ask about “it would not be i any longer (it would be we, it would be us)” i love this so much, can you talk about the decision to make this a second person pov?
(grouping these two asks together @anderstrevelyan and thank you so much for asking about my babygirl my silly little rabbit minthara de winter 🥹🥹🥹)
the first kernel of inspiration came in december and the idea was to explore the destabilized alliance of the dead three's chosen through the pov of an outsider, and specifically to try and explore the reason why orin, who before then seemingly never wanted a sidekick (she killed her butler right as he presented himself to her!), post-durge assasination felt the (emotional?) need to have someone brainwashed to worship her.
as for the second-person pov it was a mix-mash of thinking about the way rebecca uses the first person to de-personalize mrs de winter (in juxtaposition to rebecca, who for obvious reasons, is always talked about in the third person but who is still a more 'tangible' presence); and the way the fifth season by n.k. jemisin (i mention the first book bc later the reason for the 2nd pov gets reframed a little bit) uses the 2nd pov to depict this woman's fragmented post-trauma experience and dissociation. mostly bc in my experience 2nd pov is the closest thing you can use to achieve a dissociated state just by playing with form alone, and specifically in the context of bg3 it seemed plausible that a person not insulated from the absolute thanks to the artifact would 'remember' that mind-control as an out-of-body experience.
an added-layer to the 2nd pov that i enjoyed was the durge-piloting-minthara angle. so essentially a tadpole-mind link being created between the two due minthara's traumatic tadpoling and proximity. and durge 'narrating' the whole experience for you (minthara). but idk if this makes as much sense as the rest <3 but it was a lot of fun to me as an added bonus. this also inspired by 2nd pov use in the stone sky by n.k. jemisin
#.ask#wheeeew this got long but i do have a lot of fairly tangled thoughts as to why i made that specific choice#as for when the choice of second pov came to: it's the in-between phase of 'i have an outline' and 'now i need to write the whole thing'#which is when i make my decisions about form and themes since i can have a vague understanding of which scenes im aiming to write#anyway thankkk youuu again so very much <3<3
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Writing patterns tag game!
Rules: list the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there's a pattern!
i was tagged by @flownwrong - thank you!! for the sake of the experiment, i skipped the two notably older fics that i posted to ao3 recently enough to show up in this top 10. it was a different time, man. (i mean, hardly, but i'm skipping them anyway.)
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1) “Your hair smells nice,” Pa says.
2) Of course Pat takes notice when Pran gets his guitar out of its bag and takes it to the couch, but there’s an art to these things.
3) After all of the commotion, all of the stress, all of the dread, Steve finds the one face he’s looking for in the crowd of teens in formal wear.
4) Billy keeps saying fucking no no no to Joe about the working girls, until eventually the girls get bored and leave.
5) For three months, there’s a girl.
6) Hutch wakes up alone, but only nominally.
7) They fall into his apartment with Jill’s hand in his back pocket and his mouth attached to her clavicle – but they do fall, and when he adds a habit-driven attempt to kick the door shut, he ends up with a mouth full of her soft brown hair and she has to grab his shoulder to avoid being tripped by the doormat.
8) After they sell the restaurant, Kamekona doesn’t keep the name they gave it.
9) Most stabbings, Starsky has found in his years on the job, happen either out on the street or in the kind of apartment building mothers wouldn’t want their sons to live in.
10) When Hutch hops down the last few steps and exits the building door, there’s a familiar red car already waiting for him.
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i think the main thing about opening lines for me is that i often try to cram in as much setup as possible, because there's a good chance the fic is mostly one dialogue scene and i've already written that part and now i'm forced to explain to my reader that they're not just voices hovering in indefinable darkness (and the easy way is to do that up top if i can, so it doesn't have to interrupt the flow of the dialogue). and then sometimes (1, 5, 6, maybe 8) i attempt to avoid throwing everyone headfirst into a soup of words (i love a ridiculously long sentence! 7, my beloved) by keeping it intentionally short and snappy. there are lots of signal words, too! two afters, when, of course, for three months. i still like "most stabbings" (9) as opening words. 4 and 5 both have the "girl" in them, which means nothing, but is still a fun coincidence in this sequence.
i'll tag (as always, with no pressure!) @redgoldblue @actingcamplibrarian @luredin @dedkake @stephmcx and anyone else who writes fic and feels like doing this. this is a fun thing to read! i'd like to see them!
#*#tag games#i sort of want to do this for last lines too now. could be interesting!#usually when last lines don't want to cooperate they're far more of a headache to me than first lines#a first line is important! it hooks the reader! but if it's not an immediate smash hit all is not lost#a last line on the other hand. there's literally no fic left after that. that's why it's the last line#it HAS to be good#or i mean. it doesn't. there are no rules. but ideally i WANT it to be good#to either put a neat little bow on what came before or (depending on the type of fic) aim one last good kick. you know
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