#and that was also absolutely a pink panther reference

[nurgletwh]

Do you have a sona or a particular way in which you portray yourself? Asking for fanart purposes.

Huh. I haven’t ever really thought about it. I mean, I’ve resonated with some of the D&D characters I’ve played (a certain highly chaotic, absolutely flamboyantly bisexual prismatic Dragonborn rogue comes to mind), and @grumpyoldsnake gave me a drawing of a sphinx tabaxi bard I had a lot of fun with. But nothing akin to what I’ve seen some people identify with!

I think “messily chaotic with strong helpful yet sarcastic vibes” covers most of it. My writing probably clued you in to that one, though. xD

[montyterrible]

An American Clouseau in Africa—or, Ernest Gets Problematic-er?

I think the potential trouble with 1997’s Ernest Goes to Africa is pretty clear from the title alone, but the above image, which was the first thing I saw upon loading the IMDb page for the movie, gets at the heart of the matter pretty cleanly as well. Of all the Ernest movies I remember watching and re-watching from my childhood, this was one of the ones I expected to have aged the worst, and that is pretty much true. You’ve got the brownface from the above image, topped off with a pretty racist accent, and which goes on for a bit, the treatment of native people and their languages and customs as a somewhat prominent part of the overall story, and a man-in-a-dress gag sequence where Ernest disguises himself to infiltrate a harem. And while there are still some fun elements, like Ernest using the bra that was part of his harem disguise to launch ostrich eggs at a pursuing truck and knock out some gunmen, the fun is definitely spoiled some for me these days because of the above insensitivity. But I more or less expected that going into it.

What surprised me most in the end was that Goes to Africa apparently was actually shot in Africa (in Johannesburg). That doesn’t absolve it of anything, obviously, but I had figured that after all of the above, the final kicker of it all would end up being that it was filmed in Tennessee or something. I wasn’t sure, looking at the outdoor locations on offer. My feeling was definitely more American Lawn Grass at points, an impression that I think arose partly from the fact that in somewhat stark contrast with Ernest Goes to Jail (1990), Goes to Africa looks much less like a “real movie.” It looks a bit flimsier, a bit less… cinematically lit, and with some footage that seems to be at a higher frame rate, though at least some of that might be intentional, to create an illusion of speed at certain points. Looking into the movie a little afterward and finding out it was one of the later, direct-to-video Ernest features made those observations make a lot of sense.

I’m keeping the “American Clouseau” thing in the title because Goes to Africa still reminds me a little of The Pink Panther. A heist to steal two precious stones in the opening scene in Africa contributes to that impression, but the international intrigue elements that kind of develop off on their own away from the main character for stretches also add a nice bit of (maybe) compelling drama to the proceedings just like they do in a similar fashion in The Return of the Pink Panther (1975). On the other hand, the visual reference for that opening is clearly Indiana Jones, and the daring fictional hero that gets evoked at points as Ernest’s love interest’s ideal man is called “Illinois Smith” to really drive that point home.

Goes to Africa is a lot Bigger than Goes to Jail in terms of its basic concept—Ernest P. Worrell, recently fired gas station mechanic, gets mistaken for a secret agent of some sort and whisked off to Africa with the waitress he’s been trying to impress—but there is something fun about the aggressively Blue-Collar-Coded Ernest, with his jeans and denim vest and ballcap and grit-colored t-shirt, being in this situation, with his pockets full of rubber chickens and teddy bears and, like, salami. It’s also just nice to watch a movie with such incredibly normal-looking people in it. It’s been said before, and about far better “old movies” than Ernest Goes to Africa, but we’re sorely missing folks like this in these dark airbrushed, roided-out days. I was mesmerized by the main antagonist’s thinning hair in part because he absolutely looked the part of the sort of White Guy Poacher you’d expect to steal valuable jewels from indigenous people in Africa, and I just know that role would not have been so well-cast if somehow Ernest Goes to Africa was made today. Which is to say that when conservatives want to make a point about “wokeness” or some such nonsense by invoking the un-make-ability of Blazing Saddles (1974), they could at least go for the deeper cut and use Ernest Goes to Africa instead, for variety’s sake maybe.

[mariska]

✨ 2022 Faves ✨

tagged by @sanchoyo !! thank ya, i haven't done of these lil tumblr tag posts in a while, i always have fun with em! 🥳

Favorite books: "I'm Glad My Mom Died" by Jennette McCurdy for sure was my absolute fav, i am lucky enough to have a first edition signed copy of the hardcover version since the pre-orders for it were surprisingly affordable on the official site a while back, so it's also just a very special book to me in general too 🥺 i really liked her writing style, iirc it was adapted from a one-person theater show Jennette was performing a few years back and that probably has something to do with the non-conventional way of writing a memoir, but it was so much more accessible for me to read with my adhd and i loved how she blended bits of her own inner monologue throughout her life as a sort of dark comedy with a genuinely haunting and very sad series of events. a super intense read but if you're able to read it i can't reccommend it enough, it's really good

Favorite movies: oh god i watch too many movies to ever properly answer this question LOL ok. this will probably be a way too long list prepare thyself (im just gonna list faves that were released this year since the questions are 2022 related, also not in any particular order); Glass Onion, Everything Everywhere All At Once, X, Pearl, Weird: The Al Yankovic Story, Turning Red

Favorite songs: OH GOD. HDSHGDSHSJB ok. also going to stick to things released this year otherwise this list would never ever end LOL; Hayloft II by Mother Mother, the entirety of Laurel Hell by Mitski, the entirety of And In The Darkness, Hearts Aglow by Weyes Blood, This Is Why & The News by Paramore, Glyceride by Soyboy, This Is A Life (from Everything Everywhere All At Once) by Son Lux, Mitski & David Byrne, YES MOM by Tessa Violet, Blue Dusk by Sun's Signature, Lux Æterna by Metallica, dumb dumb by mazie, Ptolemaea by Ethel Cain, Vampire Reference in a Minor Key by Will Wood, Time Machine by Daisy the Great, Piggy by St. Vincent, FYB by Poppy, Pink Panther, Pink Rover & The Rapture (but it's Pink) by Scene Queen, girlfriend by hemlocke springs, Thérèse by Maya Hawke

Favorite Shows: i think all i've watched that had new content in 2022 was Chucky LOL, many others i want to watch/catch up on soon though

Favorite Memories: The Whole Summer since i got 2 spend it with my bestie irl as my roommate (housemate??? is there a word for a roommate who stays in a different room....is that just roommate LMAO), but especially the night i recorded the first part of the 80's Devilman OVA onto a blank vhs tape while we watched it and i forgot to turn the internet off on my laptop and my house's crap internet disconnected multiple times during the ending credits sequence which made a big blank comcast pop-up window take over the whole screen and i tried to remedy it on the vhs tape by rewinding and recording over it but then it kept happening so i kept rewinding by a few seconds and re-recording and it resulted in the accidental creation of the funniest vhs tape in my collection so far (that whole paragraph is a video i took of how it looks on the tape and us seeing that absolute disaster for the first time after i was done recording and we popped it into the tv to see what a bad job i did)

[eggs-can-draw]

BOOM POW MOTHER FUCKERS

Jokah

Leader of the thieves! Embodies their entire “Thing”

Black main with red and white accents

No notes! He’s perfect. He’s a perfect little thief boy.

Some stars would be cool tho,,, (Guy who said no notes and immediately makes a note)

Slapping this here cause it's a detail a lotta people forget when drawing him HIS PANTS ARE BAGGY AT THE TOP!! They like. Pumpkin out. INCREDIBLY SHAPED I absolutely adore it and how they use it in official art and stuff. They look so comfy I want a pair

Skull

Ryuji!! “Charge Commander” Whatever that is. Joker’s right hand man!! (according to google it means he’s the guy who actually Finds the missions and that makes sense. He does that.)

Black main with yellow and red (also some silver/metal accs)

Pirate Boy

Poifect!!

Ok a bit more his fit compliments joker while also doing his own thing so NICELY this is a solid win for pegoryu but also it makes me so mad that Ann doesn't match them that well. Joker and Ryuji look like they were made to be put next to each other and I love it. 

The yellow is spaced out while still feeling like His color so so so well I love him…AND THE RED!!! Ketchup and mustard looking boy he’s incredible

The kneepads are a reference to his knee injury. I can't be crazy. Guys. guys I can't be.

The only thing I’d want is a little more asymmetry but I think I just like asymmetry

Panther

Femme Fatale ok she's a femme fatale she she's SHE’S A FEMME LESBIAN FEMME FATALE–

FIRE TRUCK RED with some dark reds and pink

Oh god where did we go so wrong

Zipper and leather motif? We COULD cook w/ that instead of sexualizing the grooming victim guys. Just sayin.

I think she should have some visual ties with mona,,, since they’re both cats,,,,,just sayin

The cooch zipper evokes physical pain. But I like the tail. The tail is cute. I like how it’s like. Alive.

I think her mask should make the cat ears hair accessories and go under her bangs instead of giving her a 5-head. Just me tho.

Rest under the cut!!!

Fox

He make a the calling cards that's what he does

Dark blues and blacks with some whites and reds (also a little bit of dark gold accs)

Visually, he’s like if whatever Akechi had going on was in one design. And was good.

Traditional Japanese culture (is that what I should call it? He probably draws from a specific era but I unno what) vibe!! And he kills!! I love him!!

Very top heavy, but it's balanced out with his tail, he’s perfect.

Queen

She’s the getaway driver!!! That's why her third awakening is a car!! Also team strategist but also getaway driver!!

Blacks and grays and dark blues and a smattering of white but honestly. It all kinda melds together I don't like it

Bad and stinky I hate this outfit. The spikes are cool though. Istg she’s meant to have a like. 80s biker theme. Also her codename is a reference to Queen the band I can’t be crazy

BAD but they fumbled with Makoto a lot imo

I promise I like Makoto. I just have Issues with her fit. I’ve SEEN her serve (P5D) I know she can

Oracle

Little sister!! She’s the guy in the chair because if anything bad happened to her I’d fuckin hurt someone also cause she’s a smartie pants

Blacks and greeeeens and a smidge of red to help her hair not feel out of place (also some metalwork like Ryuji)

So I’m kinda conflicted on this fit. I REALLY like her whole vibe, she’s like if the song She Came From Outer Space from ahit was a fit,  but i don't like how form fitting it feels. I think it should feel a bit more. comfortable.

Very bottom heavy!! Her outfit proportions feel like a splatoon character. Also a very techwear cyberpunk vibe, I love her!!

Necronomicon shouldn't have had tentacles now Maruki steps on her toes, imo Necronomicon shoulda had a like. Tractor beam. So she can pick up innocent cows. Don't ask me how this connects to her design, it just does. Top ten things that should be changed when 5 gets the reload treatment.

I NEED her to have a little cow charm somewhere it’s a physical need. She's an alien. I lived in alien country. I'm a professional. ALSO THE BIG CLUNKY CROCS ARE SO PERFECT!!!! and the way they hook into her pants AGH

Noir

MY WIFE!! Her arc is when the thieves begin to get kinda big heads and all cocky, so she’s a more classic gentleman thief to  show how she thematically pulls them back to earth! Also she’s the best party member. She deal the big number. I love her. 

Mainly pinks and purples, with a tasteful amount of black! I love her so so much

The pumpkin pants were INSPIRED. She looks so cute and full of whimsy ALSO THE BIGASS FEATHER!! It makes her feel so PERFECT when put next to Mona they mesh so well.

Tails I miss my wife. I miss my wife tails.

Crow (Robin)

Perfect prince boy Goro Akechi ~✰ he’s their enemy, the detective hunting them down (the Ganymede to Joker’s Arsene, if you will)

The better of his two persona fits, let's be real. Be honest with me. Look me in my eyes. Despite the bar being in hell tho, this outfit is really good!! I love all the A’s in it, it really makes me sad! The way his pants are shaped and sit on him scratches my brain just right. He looks like he has a stick up his ass and genuine morals (which he does!! Robin is just as much his persona as Loki!! In this essay I will–!!)

White to contrast all the black of the thieves, but red to tie him back in with them!! Also some gold accs to keep the visual warmth wowie

Some better shoes could do him well methinks, also further the bird motif let that be his unifying thing since he keeps the codename with the black mask fit

Violet

She NEEDS two fits ok. She’s the Sumi no idea what her job is. She can do some cool flips and teaches joker to do some cool flips. Visually, her design is DEFINITELY copycatting on joker which is so fuckin cool cause like. Yeah. yeah ofc she copies her older sibling/mentor figure. I wonder if she’s ever done that before huh. It SUCKS too tho cause she doesn't match Cendrillon which is sick and twisted. Second fit when she truly awakens as Sumire that matches Cendrillon is the better timeline.

Black with reds and a bit of gold detailing. ALSO SILVER ACCS!! Also lotsa bows! Cause she’s a copycat! We could take this further. 

She has the whole gymnast vibe but I’ll be real the way it’s executed just feels a little………..gross. She’s like 16 guys wtf. Cover her up a smidge more.

The silver chain belt thing for her sword was inspired. Also her roses.

Crow (Loki)

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY. WHAT DO I SAY.

LOOK IN THAT FIT’S EYES AND TELL ME THERE IS A GOD.

Fuck gamers I like to think metaverse outfits change as the persona user grows up and their spark of rebellion grows and changes but this fit feels like DIRECT evidence to the contrary. I can see perfectly clearly a 15 y/o akechi wearing this and feeling  SOOOO COOL AND EDGY. and just continues to think it’s sooooo cool and edgy as he grows up only to be made fun of by the thieves (But who knows, maybe this outfit is the exception)

I like the belts. But I’m also a chronic belt adder. I like a good smattering of belts.

The cape feels like a fun callback to his Prince Cape so uhm. Points there

The buttons across the front are so fuckign silly to me. Bro is wearing his evil onesie. His nefarious pajamas.

Bro NEEDS some big chunky boots or SOMETHING his limbs don't feel right

The helmet is perfect with no notes. Zero. I only wish they kept the red tips on his Bird horn things he had in his engine room sprites. I really liked those…

The stripes are silly heehee nice tie to Loki

Don't talk to me about the toes. Dont. 

Mona

Mah fuckin cat

Black with yellow and white (also some blue)

Anime cat thief jesus if perfect what can I say. I can say I love him. Only three people out here defending Mona and it’s me, Haru, and Joker

gamers i just spent the past 3 hours analyzing the phantom thieves' designs do i post it

[fluxedbuds]

even if nilesy is a nasty crime boy in Blackrock i still love him

[zikadraws]

Every once in a while, I get Pink Panther recommendations in my YouTube feed, and every once in a while I remember how much I like this motherfcker, so here's a little tribute to the one toon with the most iconic theme !

Also yeah I made my OC Bianca a fan of him. He's quite literally the one reason she likes to wear pink XD (sorry for the weird tuba pose guess who started drawing without any reference whatsoever again-)

Anyway Pink Panther you absolute icon

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

3 Lost Tomb Characters’ Guides to Dealing With Wu/Nine Families Issues

Xie Yuchen

1.) Money can’t buy happiness, but it can find tomb raids, which are happy (?) and can support your aesthetic needs. You’re really into jewel tones right now, and it’s reflected in the gear for your next outing. You tried to avoid bringing Wu Xie, both for the disruption to the aesthetic and your sanity, but somehow the most oblivious man alive has a knack for showing up in the wrong place always.

2.) Opera is a coping mechanism and a hobby. Additionally, you look great in the costumes. Work it. Certainly a plus to show up at a Nine Families meeting in full attire, Wang Pangzi always applauds your entrance with a standing ovation and Huo Xiuxiu takes video of people’s reactions. The only time you were upstaged was when Wu San Xing, who was supposedly dead (again) at the time, strutted into a meeting at the very end and cast his vote on something before strutting right back out. You can appreciate the power move there.

3.) Tread a fine balance between helping your beloved friend Wu Xie and avoiding the death stares of his boyfriend when you stop by the house. Being dragged on your back through the desert was humiliating, but Zhang Qiling sharpening his sword at the dinner table while staring at you is terrifying. It doesn’t help that Wu Xie’s mini-me Li Cu, who also seems to suspect you of trying to purloin his adopted father, keeps referring to you as the Pink Panther. Hei Xiazi somehow found out and now life is hell.

4.) Despite your better instincts, get your own immortal emo boyfriend, even if Hei Xiazi is an absolute imbecile and aspiring sugar baby. Remind yourself about that vague crush you had (and will probably always have) on Wu Xie, the overwhelming evidence points to you being a morosexual. Hei Xiazi is…a challenge. But as Huo Xiuxiu points out more than once, you’d never be able to date someone who was easy or uncomplicated.

5.) It’s okay that you aren’t the chosen heir to lead the nine families. It’s okay that you aren’t the chosen heir to lead the nine families. It’s okay that you aren’t the chosen heir to lead the nine families. Repeat mantra until it sounds true. Note that there are probably worse choices than Wu Xie out there, you just need to time to think of some.

Li Cu

1.) Always remind yourself that technically you aren’t related to any of these fucking insane idiots. Always remind yourself that being related to someone doesn’t mean they’re family anyway.

2.) Try to avoid The Drama when you can—sure, it’s how you got into this mess to begin with, but more importantly you can’t be bothered to deal with The Shoes of The Lettuce King or whatever new bullshit they’re all obsessed with digging up. Shit’s crazy. Inevitably you’ll get involved somehow, but put it off while you can.

3.) You are Team Wu Xie. Doesn’t matter if some other family’s representative tries to go behind his back to try to steal your loyalty with money (fuck right off, boomers), or try to convince you that Wu Xie is a dangerous man to follow (whoa no shit wow really?? good to know, never would have guessed), or claim their group can offer you a place to belong (you have a place now and you know exactly where it is, it’s noisy and dusty and creaky and always smells like homemade soup). You always note down the representatives’ names, Pangzi has a notebook for it that he titled The Shady B*tches Burn Book.

4.) Zhang Qiling is the coolest person ever. Like yeah shit was awkward af at first but like. So cool. Last month, when those creeps broke in? Handled. With ease (this is also the night you learned Wang Meng has a frying pan weapon “from last time” and zero fucks left to give). It’s weird, feeling safe. Xiao Ge just has that effect. You kinda get why Wu Xie was so batshit determined to get him back.

5.) Bring your college friends to the Nine Families meetings. It freaks everyone out and they could use the new blood (metaphorically).

Liu Sang

1.) Your Idol lives at Wushanju part-time, when he’s not off on missions or wandering. You accept that going to see Zhang Qiling necessarily involves being force fed Pangzi’s new recipe and half-listening to Wu Xie babbling about grave etchings. Meanwhile Wang Meng color-codes your modeling schedule, Li Cu steals half your food (while making full eye contact) and Kan Jian blushingly sling-shots flower petals into your hair. You might as well move in here, Wu Xie suggests casually one day, and you don’t really have a good argument against it. Wu Xie wants to keep his people close, you realize, and you try not to feel too warm about that.

2.) Always attend the meetings when there is tension. The Wu family is unpopular with most of the other families on a good day…you know they can technically handle themselves but their heir is also a train-wreck who has almost lost all his possessions several times while pursuing goals so the family needs some nice, sensible, super hearing allies.

3.) Xiao Bai and Kan Jian come to all of your modeling shows. Your Idol came exactly once—some designer excitedly tried to recruit him for modeling and he literally climbed out a window to leave the conversation. Still, it is nice to have friends come to your shows, and you save seats for them. You always save extra shoot pictures at their request and it’s a smug and definitely not at all heart-fluttery moment when you see Kan Jian has given your picture pride of place on his dresser.

4.) Allies come in all forms. After your ears get damaged, Huo Daofu is the one who somehow fixes everything while bitching loudly about how no one around here can stay healthy for five minutes the entire time, and you kind of get his deal a little. He leaves you his card, which according to Pangzi is an offer of lifelong friendship, and leaves Wu Xie the bill (which seems astronomical until you figure out their whole situation nowadays, wherein Huo Daofu would be shocked and borderline angry if Wu Xie ever actually tried to pay him back).

5.) Training with the real, actual Zhang Qiling is the best thing ever, so it’s a little disappointing one day when Wu Xie suggests he could spar with you instead for a change. You are a little concerned (and not-so-secretly excited) about kicking his ass in front of your idol. It’s not a surprise that Wu Xie fights dirty, but it is a surprise that Wu Xie beats you. By out-thinking you every step of the way. It’s both humbling and (you will take this to your grave) incredibly hot. From that point on you alternate fight-sparring with Idol and strategy-sparring with Wu Xie. Wu Erbai sends you The Art of War as a birthday present, which you realize—that is the signal that you’ve been fully welcomed into the fold.

[philosopherking1887]

On race in the Thor movies

I’ve been seeing some posts circulating (again) debating whether it’s appropriate to refer to MCU Loki as “POC-coded,” given that the actor who plays him (and the actor who plays Laufey in blue makeup and CGI whatnot) is white. I suspect that the terminology is getting in the way of clarity on the issue.

Maybe we should drop the reference to “POC,” because it’s completely contingent that in the world we live in, the majority of recent conquest and oppression along lines of ancestral group membership has been a matter of people of European origin invading, colonizing, and exploiting people in and from other parts of the world who typically have darker skin.

The important thing is that Loki is presented as a racialized Other in the historical and cultural context of the story, because the Frost Giants/Jotnar are presented as racialized Others from the perspective of Asgardian society. The Jotnar are a conquered enemy people who have been robbed of resources and kept in poverty. Loki is a “stolen child” who passes as a member of the dominant racial group. A lot of the stories about this kind of “passing” in our world involve POC who pass as white, but that’s not crucial to the concept. Members of subordinate ethnic groups can “pass” as members of a dominant ethnic group regardless of whether skin color plays any role in demarcating them. In fact, in the case of Aesir and Jotnar, skin color does play a role; but that’s incidental.

What about Heimdall, Valkyrie, and Hogun? There are actually two different answers here. Heimdall and Valkyrie (Brunhilde) are not presented as racialized Others. Their skin color and facial features are presented as being in the normal range for Asgardians and make absolutely no difference to their social standing. (This also appears to be true of blue vs. ‘pink’ Kree in Captain Marvel; both are equally part of the dominant racial group, regardless of skin color.) This kind of “race-blind casting” is an aspirational gesture, presenting a fictional society in which the types of physical differences that do make a difference in the actual world make no difference at all. It allows actors of color to play roles in which their real-world racial identity does not figure; it allows viewers of color to see themselves in powerful, heroic characters who are not oppressed on the basis of race. (This is a different kind of aspiration than, say, Black Panther, where the race of the characters does matter; Wakandan characters are powerful, heroic, innovative, etc., and it’s very important to the situation that they are of African origin, against the backdrop of a world similar to the actual world, with its actual history of the European colonization of Africa and oppression of people of African descent.)

Hogun, on the other hand, is presented as a racialized Other -- but a different kind than Loki and the Jotnar. When Thor & co. go to Vanaheim in The Dark World to deal with the “Marauders,” we see that the local population mostly appears to have typically East Asian features. Hogun is a foreigner on Asgard; he speaks with a noticeable accent. However, the relationship of this racialized group to the culture whose perspective is central (the Asgardians) is quite different from their relationship with the Jotnar. The Jotnar are a conquered, downtrodden, loathed, and mistrusted enemy; the Vanir are allies, perhaps a protectorate or a client state. This might also be regarded as a form of oppression or colonization; the details of the political situation are not made clear. Real-world racial identity -- East Asian vs. European-or-African -- is used as a marker of fictional racial identity in this case, where it is not with the representation of the Jotnar.

Tl;dr: Maybe we should all stop arguing about “POC-coding” and instead talk about being a racialized Other in the fictional context. Ragnarok stans who are intent on dismissing Loki as “a white boy who can’t have real problems” and all his fans as horny straight white girls will probably find some new pretext to call us all racist, but at least that will deprive them of one facile line of argument.

[justasimplesinner]

Ok ok Eddie with a jock friend (and eventual s/o), here's what I'm thinking: High school Eddie (whatever version honestly) mouths off to some teachers or embarrasses them with his superior intellect in an insulting way and gets sent to the principal's office. Since this is a repeat offense (try seven times and counting) the punishment is more severe...but the principal says she'll lighten his detention sentence if he uses his smarts for good and enters the high school's peer tutoring program for at least a month. Cue jock who is eager to learn but maybe has a learning disability or ADHD and their course material just isn't sticking.

They come to Eddie for help and he's a bit of an ass at first but then he realizes that they're not just looking for answers; they are genuinely interested in what he has to say and wants to learn so they can do their homework on their own. He gets to know them and how intelligent they are in other ways and his little heart goes doki-doki.

this invoked violent daydreaming in me, i've gotten distracted by my own thoughts every 5 minutes while writing this

Edward with a dumb jock s/o hcs:

safe to say, this situation isn't ideal, and Eddie is not happy at all. he has to deal with idiots and brutes every day anyway, and now they're taking some of his only spare time away from them all just because he was right and his teacher was wrong? why is he constantly being punished for being right, for being smart?

he doesn't get along with his fellow peers from the program at all. some of them recognized him already and knew it was better to stay away lest they wanted to get insulted either by him or everyone else for talking to him, some of them tried to reach out but gave out pretty quickly. in highschool, Edward became way more bratty and mean. in middle school, he was still trying to fit in but he was incredibly overwhelming for other kids and also an easy target, and that really made him resent everyone around him. so getting along with the other students wasn't really an option

however, he dreaded meeting the ones he had to tutor even more. partly because he did not want to deal with some idiots that couldn't get an equation right, partly because he knew most of those idiots are going to be the same ones that always pick on him. half the football team had to be assigned to that program so they would pass their classes. sports don't always give you a get out of jail free pass apparently, and they were forced to study, which didn't sit well with them at all

and then, you came along. he didn't know if you were better or worse than the rest of the jock community that he had the displeasure of meeting. you were just so... dense. it's like you were smart but didn't even know it and couldn't quite use that to your advantage. it fucking annoyed him. incredibly so. you were frustrating beyond imagination. you were getting distracted so easily, and he had to explain the same thing over and over to you and it was driving him up the wall. why couldn't you just get it? Edward both thinks he's the smartest and that nobody will ever understand the lengths his knowledge goes to, and can't quite grasp the fact that people just can't understand something that's so blatantly obvious to him. safe to say, he would not be a good teacher

Ed is absolutely appaled by your eagerness to learn though. practically everything he says flies over your head and despite all his rambling, you still don't understand jack shit, but at the same time... you're such an avid listener. you genuinely think this peer tutoring program could help you get better. you want to get better. and as much as he doesn't want to admit, it really scores you some brownie points in his eyes. because despite everything, you at least try. you don't expect him to do your homework for you and guarantee you a good grade, you genuinely want to work for it. you expect him to explain things to you so you can do that homework yourself and you can be proud of yourself for doing something right. sometimes, he thinks he'd prefer it if you just threatened him to do your work for you because getting you to remember something is an impossible task, but he doesn't mean that

he remembers one of your first study sessions together when he just snapped and almost screamed at you that you were an idiot. to his absolute astonishment, you didn't beat his ass, you didn't even scream back. you just smiled your stupid dorky smile and laughed your stupid dorky smile, saying that he clearly wasn't in the mood so instead of studying you took him for a late lunch. a lunch. and instead of learning more about what you were supposed you, you were trying to learn more about him. best thing is, that day was the first and only time he shared any form of personal information with you and - as opposed to the Mendeleev's table - you memorized most of what he said. hell, next time you saw him, you brought him that specific chocolate he somehow admitted to liking

more and more often, you were bringing him small things, 'thank you gifts' as you called them. as if you knew you were hard to put up with sometimes, at least for him. of course, at first he took it as some sort of bribe, that you tried to worm your way into his graces so he'd do your homework for you or whatever but soon enough you made him realise that you were just genuinely being nice. he has never met someone quite like you, you were an enigma to him

soon enough, he didn't even realise he was looking forward to those study sessions with you. he was constantly lying to himself about how annoying and dense you were, and yet he started feeling more comfortable around you and talking with you freely. he started liking your stupid inquires that usually were something along the lines of "what kind of animal is the Pink Panther", even smirking at them under his nose as if he found idiocy amusing. it was both a nightmare and a blessing to have you around

he couldn't quite understand the weird feeling he got whenever you referred to him as your friend or greeted him at the corridors. or when you offered to have some study sessions at your house because you couldn't keep quiet in the school library and put all the librarians on edge. he didn't really get what was going on with him when he smiled and laughed along with you, in your messy room, as you were trying to figure out how to write a proper essay

he... liked coming to your house. it was admittedly better than the library. your parents were really warm and welcoming, weirdly supportive which he couldn't quite understand since you weren't... well, the brightest. the food was nice, too. and your room was so... you. that's the only way to describe it, what with all the little trinkets and posters and things laying around, and with some music or movies in the background. he also noticed a constantly reoccuring theme amongst your possessions and he was surprised how much knowledge you had on one or two specific subjects. your small little obsessions that you somehow learned about a lot easier than anything else

at some point, without even realising it, you two started hanging out. like, really hanging out, not just meeting up to study. you played some games and talked about random stuff, with you always inquiring about everything, which in turn made him feel like someone actually listened to him for once and rambling for hours to no end. you even tried to teach him your favourite sports, despite his protests, and he was really shocked when you didn't laugh at his general clumsiness and awkwardness when it came to physical activities. you were actually just as weirdly supportive of him as your parents were of you. he didn't see you get annoyed at him even once, and you always tried to explain to the best of your abilities how things worked in sports. show him the proper moves and stances. he didn't quite pick it up, but you two had... fun

spending so much time with you made him notice your strengths, and there were suprisingly many, not just physical (but god, you could just lift him up like a stick? like he wieghed nothing?). he started to slowly figure out your thinking process which made him use different teaching methods that suited you better and lo and behold, there was progress. nothing too crazy, but it was progress. he didn't know which one of you was more proud - you or him

you finally found a way to learn and you started getting better grades. you didn't have to sacrifice school for sports or vice versa. you were going to pass. and all those small victories made Ed realise that soon enough, you won't need him anymore. you'll be capable of learning by yourself, since now you found a good way to do it. you weren't going to meet up with him so often, instead going out with your actual friends since now you could. now you had time. and when i tell you that he almost sabotaged you both just to force you to stick with him for a little while longer-

who was going to tell him stupid jokes now? who was going to listen to him? who was going to talk to him? who was going to cuddle him on your bed and fall asleep there with him from the pure exhaustion from studying? who was going to be his golden retriever friend when you were gone? he wouldn't ever imagine he'd be so sad to get rid of a bumbling idiot in his life? you were his bumbling idiot, and he really didn't want to go back to how things were before he knew you. he didn't want to be alone again. he didn't want to stop being so happy

so let me tell you, the pure fucking relief on his face when you start telling him about how many fun things you two can do now that you don't have to study all the time and hang out more is unimaginable. you never felt him hug you so tight as in that one moment

[ravenadottir]

What would the islanders dress up as for Halloween?

oooooh! i like this. i have a post on my old one, but i don’t exactly stand by all of them. and some of the people that follow me a little longer know that i wrote a halloween reunion for them, so when i mention “reunion”, that’s what i mean.

lucas - vampire or swat. either way, it’s the ultimate dream, and i can bet he would love the roleplay. his vampire self is the one that i picture him in, better, but swat is just... *fanny flutters* like... the vest and all... you can picture lucas smugly showing off.

gary - there’s nothing more than a werewolf. at this point, it’s pretty much canon. although, i can imagine gary being the clueless type that dresses like something terribly unsexy, like a gorilla, and still manages to look like a snacc

noah - i love imagining him in prince fabrics. in my old post, i said “prince naveen” (also in the reunion), just ‘cause i think he can pull the olive green quite nicely, and his skin tone would shine on that shade.

bobby - i said black panther, ‘cause they have similar body type, and i can picture him looking fine in one of those! but of course it would be sexy chef. however i wanna see bobby in an aladdin costume. he would look soooo cute!

kassam - i can’t see kassam dressing up, even though i love it. for his reunion, i didn’t even write him in a costume. i can’t see it. but if i would guess, the closest would be something like bender, from the breakfast club.

carl - SPOCK. I SAID WHAT I SAID. there’s a reason why he’s pale and has that specific haircut and dark color on his hair. he was made to cosplay and dress up as spock, and no one can change my mind. his reunion was like this, his sexy chapter is like this, his new reunion, on his story, is also spock. (there’s a drawing, inspired by the chapter i wrote ((i’m so fucking happy about that!!) and this is the link so you can check it out!)

henrik - i can see henrik in so many costumes, and in the past, i wrote him as thor. just to make the reference, and i do think he would like to play around that. but i can see him being dumb enough to dress up as tarzan or something of that genre, and die from coldness, because he forgot halloween is hella windy and freezing. **/because one time, i received an ask saying henrik’s frown/annoyed face looks like he’sa saying “arggggg” like a pirate (which i agree!) @therealityofthematteris drew him in pirate rags and i love it! check it out, it’s hella cute!

marisol - i don’t have many for her. but despite of being a serious person, i can see her coordinating costumes with her partner. her reunion is the joker and harley quinn. her, being the joker, in the purple suit. (i don’t know about y’all, but i would melt if my girlfriend wore this outfit) **deep sigh***

lottie - i wrote her as “bloody mary” to atribute the makeup that goes with it, but i can see her in “elvira” as well.

hope - i wanted to see her as storm. i love storm, and hope is as powerful and fierce as her.

chelsea  she’s always elle woods, no matter what reunion i write. i picture her in the pink suits and dresses, carrying a giant bag with a small plushie dog in it.

priya - cleopatra, and that’s on that.

ibrahim would absolutely be a super hero, preferably violet man, but so far, i haven’t found any art on that, which is upsetting. i think it would be cute to see it. 

[awesomehoggirl]

it’s wip wednesday so i thought i’d share a quick writing wip from my multi chapter fem howince fic which will maybe be done in 20 years ! it’s got 8 chapters and i am still on chapter 2 if this gets finished it’ll be a miracle. the fic is called eau d’bedroom dancing because i love le tigre and imagine how fantastic riot grrl vince would be ...

mentioning before hand that i write all my first drafts and oneshots with no capitals because i find it a lot easier but with this fic when i go back over i’ll put capitals in :) (also this is a section from chapter one not the opening)

—

her name is vincenzia mirabella lucie-marié le manteau rafflesia vaisseau-spatial noire (the longest name in the class, and the only one never written up on the ‘star student!’ chalkboard) but everyone refers to her as vince. she’s new to the school, and seemingly england, but her accent is pure south london. two teachers have quit because of her already. holly moon has never been so interested in a person in her entire tiny life.

oh, she’s read up on musicians, heard their stories, wished ever so slightly that her life would someday be just as interesting — did you know nina simone had seven siblings, that john coltrane was in the navy? but the weirdness that seems to just bounce off vince’s tongue beats every story she’s ever read hands down.

it quickly becomes apparent that she’s borderline feral: if the staff-room murmurs of the teachers are to be believed, she came from a ‘neglectful home’; if vince’s own word is to be accepted, she was raised in the jungle by a cast of rock stars, animals and french nobility. holly is sensible enough to doubt her at first, but before long (and after many demonstrations of her ability to talk to animals) she’s genuinely on board. they sit behind the ash tree at lunch time, out of sight from dribbling boys and disapproving teachers, and holly figures out that through half a chocolate bar vince can be coaxed into revealing all sorts about her unorthodox childhood.

‘dunno why you’re so desperate to know about my life,’ vince complains once, when asked again to tell the story about the great order of frogs and the backwards waterfall. ‘why can’t i hear stories about you for a change?’

‘all in good time,’ says holly, whose mother is a tax attorney married to a geography teacher. ‘plus, i know you love the attention.’

and so vince sits there and talks until she goes hoarse, or loses interest, or feels like changing the subject right at a crucial moment, or the school bell rings and they have to go inside. she talks about her house made of bus tickets and her animal friends, her french duke uncle who would come down on bank holidays and teach her table manners, about joining the jackals for hunts, about skimming the treetops in the claws of squabbling vultures, about the hoots and screeches of the monkeys as they chased her through the undergrowth on the back of a hippopotamus. and holly will listen breathlessly, trying to seem nonplussed when in reality she is clinging to every last word. (tell me again about the paper-mache tiger and the rhinoceros’ game nights. tell me again again again.)

because no matter how hard her sensible brain tries, she really can’t prove them wrong. vince is hopeless at all forms of spelling or arithmetic. she is genuinely flabbergasted when explained to that, in fact, biting and shoving are not always seen as ‘playful’ in the human world. she swears like a sailor (or perhaps a rockstar) would, until the little old lady vicar gasps, snaps her bible shut and refuses to read to the year six class ever again. idioms are beyond her, let alone algebra, and the teachers insist there’s no hope — but they can’t help liking her, despite it all. there’s something so genuine about her ever-present toothy grin, her bubbly demeanour, that they soon allow her to get away with anything.

and yet holly is her best friend. and the only person (maybe in the world) vince will tell her stories to.

‘once upon a time,’ she begins one lunch break, dipping holly’s generous sacrifice of a curly wurly into her pocket for later, ‘i was out with jahooli the leopard, who was my best friend — he’d give me rides on his back when i was really small, swattin’ the bloodsuckers away with his giant tail. he’d catch me fish in his big strong jaws, crush ‘em up so i could eat ‘em right, i was just a nipper, i’d not got all my teeth in yet, but he was a right sweetheart about that sort of thing. on the surface jahooli always seemed to be a reckless character, a real rough-and-tumble kind of cat, but i knew the reality: he’d lost his mate and his litter and he was gettin’ on a bit, i was all he had left in terms of fatherhood. it meant he did get a bit invasive at times, yeah, he could be real clingy. i didn’t mind though, see, i’m wise beyond my years, so i was quite good with all that stuff, i let him vent to me when it all got a bit too much for his poor leopard heart to handle. anyway, this one day he was lookin’ after me, on account of my foster father bryan ferry being away on tour. and it was a hot afternoon, this one. really hot.’ she sinks down on her heels. ‘the kinda hot that drenches you in sweat no matter how still you stand. the kinda humid that makes your palms slick and your eyelashes heavy. most of the animals were tucked away underground by midday, but the bigger sorts like me and jahooli, we couldn’t exactly join them. so jahooli said, why don’t we make our way down to the river?’

holly feels her spine prickle. it is eerie, the way her friend’s stories pull her in.

she follows vince along to said river, feels jahooli’s long speckled tail curling round her shoulders, bumping against her collarbones, keeping her close. feels the slick wetness of the air, feels the burn of her lungs as they work in shallow pumping gasps. breathes in the hot dark of the bush, the low chatter of the canopy. soon the lumbering gait of the leopard slows, the river is in sight — the banks are busy with boars, bucks and buffalo, sunning lizards and mice. slow-blinking crocodiles cruise in the shallows. vince is not afraid of them. (holly would be.)

‘is it true if you’re being chased by a crocodile you should run in a zig-zag pattern?’ she interrupts (not because the story is getting a little too tense for her or anything).

vince rolls her eyes, makes a face as if holly has asked her the stupidest question in the world (considering just yesterday she asked holly whether all numbers bite or if the three digit ones are just especially fiesty, they clearly have different opinions on what counts as a ‘stupid question’). ‘if a crocodile were to haul its fat arse out of the nice cool water just to give you a bit of trouble, you probably did something awful to deserve it. why? are you plannin’ to go pokin’ sticks at ‘em? cause if you are, insult their music taste, they’ll go absolutely mental. most crocodiles are obsessed with alice cooper, so there’s a good starting point, have that one on me.’

‘so what’s—‘

‘oi, hush! do you want this story or not?’

holly shuts up. vince lowers her voice.

the jungle is sweaty now, the riverbanks a dripping piccadilly circus. jahooli has left vince’s side, gone to make conversation with ranbir the great panther, so she ventures alone to the water’s edge (the animals watch over her, they all like her, tiny and pink and strange as she is) and dips her feet in. the water is so clear and cold it hurts, but soon the pain ebbs and gives way to a calm coolness. she sits down, slides in up to her knees, lies back against the soft mud

the jungle is treacle now, bubbling and pooling, thick. vince soon drifts off and the leaves behind her eyelids are red. the stars are wheeling gulls, the air is thick with salt-spit, her eyelashes tangle and she slips down into the mud. somewhere else, the dulcet waves begin to lap. the elephants have arrived. jahooli and ranbir share a look before they approach, hackles raised (they are not mean-spirited creatures, but they do like to play a prank).

the jungle is long gone now, and vince dreams of strawberry ice cream. somewhere else, jahooli and ranbir wind around each other dizzyingly, teeth flashing slick and sharp. somewhere else, the elephants are fussing, distressed by their feline dance, their ashy trunks whirling as they back up their feet. pelts twist and brush together before the big-cats turn, open their jaws and let out a combined roar that wakes vince, sends animals scattering, splits the sky in two —

and the jungle rumbles. and the elephants charge.

[bugheadfamily]

This week the spotlight is on Anna ( @writeradamanteve )! Click the read more link below to get to know our member!

Spotlight by Mila, @jughead-jones | Graphic by Katie, @betty-cooper

Anna | @writeradamanteve

Name: Anna 

Age: 40

Location: New Jersey

Any other languages aside from English people can contact you in?: Filipino.

Favourite Riverdale characters and ships?: Aside from Betty and Jughead, I do love the awfulness of Cheryl Blossom and spitfire that is season 1 Veronica.

Cheryl Blossom is unapologetically terrible, and in real life, I would absolutely HATE her, but there’s something to be said about a woman who just goes all in. I get that hardness in her, and I like it that she admires others for it, too. That Toni brings out her soft side is a plus, but I would prefer that she stays true to her character outside of her romantic relationship. 

Season 1 Veronica Lodge was a champion of women. I loved that about her. I may not have bought the whole “Betty is my best friend” assertion, but I did like that she was doing it to make amends for her past. S1!Veronica wanted to do better and she looked at Betty and thought Betty was a good person to hang out with to further that. Veronica as a person is methodical. Deliberate. And those are characteristics that can be both good and bad. I like it that Veronica can go both ways. I also mean that in a very gay way. No amount of her sleeping with Archie will convince me that her character can’t be bi. I can’t even say I hate her in season 2. She seemed a little lost there, but she was deciding between her family and her principles. For a while she thought that both could coexist, but when she realized in the end that it couldn’t, she broke away. That’s badass. 

As for Betty and Jughead, I have at least 500K worth of words in fanfic that expresses the many ways I love them. But to be clear: 

I love Betty for being so steadfast in her beliefs. She may have her insecurities when it comes to how she looks and what her mother may think of her, but when it comes injustice and friends endangering themselves for sex, she isn’t going to let anyone prevent her from doing the right thing. She is a go-getter, from saving Pop’s to saving her relationship (especially when Jughead was pulling away from her). She is a master at wielding household items — a skill, we learned, she got from Alice, who’s clearly handy with a lamp. She’s kinky, and she can be scary stone cold — forcing Cheryl to testify the truth with blackmail, watching Jughead punch Chic in the face without flinching, drowning a man to get him to confess to his sins (although ask me some other time about the morality and racial undertones of that, as that is an entirely different conversation). But she also deeply values her relationships. She cares for her loved ones so much, friend or family. That makes her so strong.

Let me tell you the many Jugheads I love: Soft!Jughead, Smughead Jones, Curious Jones, Snowflake!Jughead, ProudBF!Juggie, and even HaplessSerpent!Jughead. I like him best when he’s writing and when he’s making literary references in regular conversation. I love how sarcastic he could be and how his transition from loner weird kid in Riverdale High to popular serpent prince in Southside High tugs at my heartstrings and makes me mad, too. Like Betty, he cares fiercely for the people he loves. His need to belong becomes real to him, after he tried to deny it for so long. As much as we all have our issues with Season 2 Jughead, it added certain dimensions to Jughead that I love to write about in fanfic.

Favourite moments from S1 & S2?: I think I loved most of season 1, but the moments that stood out to me most were these: When Betty was dancing happily in her Cheerleading uniform, when Betty and Jughead were searching Jason’s room and got caught, when Jughead and Betty went to the Sisters of Quiet Mercy together, when Betty rushed to SSH to save Jughead only to find him laughing at the lunch tables with his newfound friends, when Veronica stood up for Betty at the tryouts, when Veronica showed Cheryl compassion, when the girls all banded together to make Chuck suffer the consequences of his misogyny (again, I have words for this, but mostly — why only him? His wasn’t the only name on that playbook), when Cheryl calls people names, when Jughead protected Betty from her vandalized locker, and of course, when Jughead climbed Betty’s bedroom window.  While I can’t get enough of Jughead throwing Betty against the kitchen counter, I have to admit I still loved those other scenes a whole lot more. That said, I will still hope for what I mention in question #7.

Season 2 — ah, my goodness. I don’t need to explain how S2 broke my heart in so many good and bad ways. While there were some golden moments, I think most of us are in agreement that there were so many things that could’ve been done better. However, I STILL do have favorite scenes in this Hell Season: Jughead running the gauntlet was amazing, Betty working on Reggie’s car, the entire street race sequence, every time Betty uses a household object to save people (a shovel, a rolling pin, a poker), Jughead and Betty disposing of the car--from her house to the swamp, that entire episode of “The Wicked and the Divine”, Cheryl and Toni finding one another, and the hunger strike scenes.

What are your hopes for S3?:

Bughead summer sex montage. 

MOAR Bughead Detective Agency. 

A slammin’ Riverdale Parents Flashback episode. 

Joaquin stays and Kevin gets better with love and BDE.  

Kevin and Josie becoming step-siblings.

Reggie and Sweetpea being half-brothers.

Veronica being the Speakeasy Queen.

Cheryl stirring trouble (even if I know I’ll hate her for it).

Archie getting a clue.

Other fandoms you’re into?: My thing is that I don’t usually fan hard on more than one thing. My past fandoms were Harry Potter, Teen Titans, Anime (many of them at once), Cowboy Bebop, X-Files, Star Trek Voyager, and Firefly. At present, I love Star Wars (all of them — eh, except maybe for Episodes 1, 2, and 3), Wonder Woman, and all the Marvel movies.  

What are some of your favourite movies/TV?: Classics: Galaxy Quest, Tropic Thunder, Labyrinth, The Princess Bride, Forest Gump, The Matrix, Constantine, Clueless, The Breakfast Club, Transformers: The Animated Movie, Snatch, Firefly, Veronica Mars, Supernatural (Seasons 1 - 5), X-Files; 

Most Recent: Pacific Rim, Black Panther, Wonder Woman, Rogue One, Ready Player One, Anne with an E, Daredevil, Luke Cage, Jessica Jones, Anthony Bourdaine’s old and new series. 

Favourite books?: There are so many, fam, but here are the ones that first come to mind:

Harry Potter 1 - 6 (yeah, sorry, not a huge fan of the 7th)

Emma by Jane Austen

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

All of Louisa May Alcott’s books

All of Sharon Shinn

All of L.M. Montgomery

Anne Marston’s Rune Blade Trilogy

Barb and J.C. Hendee’s Noble Dead Saga

The Infernal Devices Trilogy (Cassandra Clare)

A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray

All of Zilpha Keatley Snyder books

All of Paula Danziger books

Juliet Naked by Nick Hornby

Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer

The Unlikely Disciple by Kevin Roose

The Monster of Florence by Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi

The Terror by Dan Simmons

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

Misery by Stephen King

Favourite bands/musicians?: I shall date myself, thanks:

Queen

Guns & Roses

Metallica

Nikki Minaj

Cardi B

Imagine Dragons

One Republic

The Killers

Lily Allen

Cake

Eminem

Amy Winehouse

U2

Sting

If you could live in any fictional world which one would you choose and why?: Harry Potter, no doubt. I would like to live in a world that relies on magic. I would like to go to a magical school like Hogwarts. I would love to fight in a resistance to overthrow an evil sorcerer. Plus, I would really, really love to meet Hermione.

Favourite food?:

Ramen (the real stuff, not the dried instant ones)

Banh Mi

Bun bo Hue

Sushi

Filipino Food — particularly Adobo

Tacos

Mangos and strawberries

Favourite season?: Summer.

Favourite plant?: This is an odd question to me as I don’t have a favorite plant. They are just there and sometimes they give me grief when I have to tend to the outside of my house because they’ve gotten unruly on some level (like — Fall, why do you have to discard your leaves all over my grounds?)

Favourite scent?: Baby’s breath, food, and freshly changed bed sheets.

Favourite colour?: Victorian pink.

Favourite animal?: Cats and Owls (I am definitely a witch by heart).

Are you a night owl, an early bird, or a vampire?: I sleep late and wake up early. I am an old person who can go on 5 hours of sleep.

Place you want to visit?: Portugal or Prague is next on my list.

Do you have pets? If you do, tell us a little about them: I have two pets. Pootie is a cat. He is a gray tuxedo. He loves me best, but he also hangs around my eldest child a lot. Every once in a while, he bothers my husband. Bob is a hermit crab. Bob bores the hell out of me and I am equal parts terrified that I will find him dead in his cage and tired that I am still taking care of him. His previous companions, Larry and Curly, have perished. When I found them dead, I screamed. Hermit crabs are creepy as fuck when they leave their shells, like I can’t stand them that way. I don’t know why I am stuck taking care of Bob, but he’s here, he is under my care, and God help me, he’s a stubborn bastard.

Tell us a little about yourself?: 

For work, I’m a web producer/web developer, and I maintain about 20 sites for my company.  

I used to work in publishing.

I went to law school and quit.

I eventually married my high school sweetheart and now we have 3 children.

I was always attracted to women, too, but growing up, I was too afraid to come out as bi. It still intimidates me, coming out to new people now. Most times, I just let them draw their own conclusions.

Fun or weird fact about you?: There’s nothing weird about me that you don’t already know. Fun fact: I kickbox in the nearby UFC gym, and one time, I was practicing with Tai pads with a dude who kicked me in the leg by accident — he just “grazed” me, really. I TRIED VERY HARD to pretend that I was alright. That night, my leg was swollen, and three months later, I saw that same dude fighting in the octagon on TV.

Asks for fanfic authors:

How long have you been writing?: 20 years.

Which is your favourite of the fics you’ve written?: That is impossible to answer. Truly. So I’m going to close my eyes over a list of my stories and where my finger lands, that’s my fave. It’s Drive.

Favourite fic/chapter/plot-point/character you’ve ever written?: This is even harder. 

Polly’s character arc in Wicked. I really love how I fleshed her out in that story

The development of Kevin and Jughead’s friendship in Harvest to Home

Jughead’s relationship with Archie and Jellybean in Drive.

Betty’s story arc in Drive.

The twists and turns of Wicked.

The rich ambience of Harvest to Home.

Betty and Cheryl’s friendship in Harvest to Home.

The text conversation in Drive.

Sweet Pea’s background character in Drive.

Cheryl’s character in Wicked.

The car chase scene in Drive.

The hotel scene in Cowboy Jones.

The Peitho kitchen scene in Cowboy Jones.

Which was the hardest to write, and why?: Wicked was hard to write. I had set out to write this story with the twists and turns in mind, and those twists were interlaced. I had to set stuff up all throughout the beginning and middle so that the end would make sense. It was also harder because of Season 2. The background of those episodes in contrast with what I had in mind tended to make me nervous about reader expectations. Like when Hal was suddenly the Black Hood on Riverdale, it felt odd to not make him so terrible in Wicked. 

One of the hardest chapters I had to write was a chapter written in Cheryl’s POV. Delving into her psyche was a difficult switch to turn on and at some point, I was doubting whether I can do it, but I did it and there it was. And I don’t regret it at all.

How do you come up with the ideas for you fic(s)? (examples: Do you draw inspiration from real life? Listen to music? Get inspired by TV/movies?) Do you have an process to your writing?: Inspiration is different every time. 

For Harvest to Home, I wanted to write a fic about a very domestic Betty who made beautiful things. While I was writing that fic, I was deeply into the show Fixer Upper because we had just moved into our own new home. I was absolutely inspired by the designs I saw on TV and our need to decorate our home. I wanted Betty to be so good at it that she wrote a blog about home making. I had a lot of inspiration for that as well, since in the publishing company I used to work for, I worked with a lot of chefs and homemakers who published books. 

For Drive, I was inspired by images of Mechanic!Betty at the start of Season 2. I think I may have seen a couple of fics inspired by the movie Baby Driver, where Jughead drove the getaway cars, and honestly, I got a little mad that Betty was never the driver. So I wrote the damn thing, and suddenly, Jughead was drag racing in Season 2. I wrote that fic with a lot of alternative music in the background. I usually started my chapters with the lyrics of those songs that inspired me.

For Wicked, I started writing it for Halloween and it basically grew too large of an idea to make it to Halloween of that year. I was also hesitant about how the fandom would receive a fic where Betty was a witch. Then there came that article about how Alice was possibly a Spellman. WELL THEN. 

Cowboy Jones was absolutely inspired by the Camp Bughead prompts. I figured since I hadn’t been driven out of the fandom by torches and pitchforks because of Wicked, I’d try for some sci-fi, a genre I really love. I aimed to misbehave with Cowboy Jones, so I told myself that this was going to be my smuttiest work yet. I had also put out an X-Files inspired bughead short called The Truth is Here for that same prompt. 

I answered the question about my writing process here and some more about character development here. 

Idea that you always wanted to write?: Kitchen Confidential type story, where Jughead is an asshole chef who is determined to make his restaurant succeed. Betty becomes his sous chef and shows him a thing or two about cooking and about life.

Favourite character to write?: Betty and Jughead, no doubt.

Best comment/review you’ve ever received?: Well, there are so many commenters who have been so fantastic, but my favorite comments come from those who want to have a discussion with me, mostly because I like to reply to all commenters to express my gratitude and it’s easier to reply when I can pick up a conversation.

Best and worst parts of being a writer?: Best part is finishing a chapter and posting it. Worst part is getting flamed. I have been fortunate enough to have a welcoming group of readers here, but I’ve had my share of flames in other fandoms. I always try to dig deep for something constructive in them — there always is something that can be so useful to my writing, but man, those are TOUGH to handle sometimes.

Do you have any advice to offer?: Few things:

Don’t let fear rule your life. Embrace that fear and get to know it. Find out what makes it frightening, then overcome it. 

Practice. That is the only thing that will make you better at anything. 

Learn from failure. It’s a bitch of a teacher but it’s the best lesson you’ll ever have.

Find work that you love. It always pays.

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This is the eleventh installment of Bughead Family’s Member Spotlight series. Each week, a member’s url is selected through a randomizer and they will be featured in a spotlight post. In order to participate, please join the Bughead Discord (more information found here). Thank you.

[hungryandliterate-blog]

Zap Black & The Sixth Century Future Recovery Group - ‘Coulture’

This is one of the the most complex, challenging, and rewarding albums released recently, and I swear some big film studio is just going to pick it up for the token ‘character accidentally takes acid’ scene.

I think it’s fair to say some bands harken to a certain time period when they make an album. Maybe it has 80′s new wave influence. Maybe it has a 90′s grunge feel. But Zap is an artist out of time. With ‘Coulture,’ the SCFRG (wow what a name) gives you an entire era of culture deconstructed and reimagined. While I’m not up on fusion jazz, and can’t speak to the academic successfulness of the arrangements of ‘Welcome to Hudson,’ ‘La Chismea,’ etc, or the technical correctness of the improvised tracks like ‘Legions In The Ocean,’ I can say that they’re important goalposts for a record that breaks in and out of seriousness, reflection, and nuanced reference for something far greater than the sum of the parts. Whether or not it’s intentional, most of the ‘jazzy’ tracks remind me of classic backing scores to ‘golden age’ cartoons like Pink Panther and Scooby Doo. While at first I attempted to fight viewing the music through that lens, the skit tracks, which pulled me into a Monty Python-esque tongue-in-cheek mentality reaffirmed that the band is well aware of the canonical time, and to what media their music is going to reference. Stepping beyond instrumentation, the album pulls you through several pop-adjacent tracks that sound like a blender full of less-dramatic King Crimson, more technically apt B-52′s, and a dash of The Brave Little Toaster. While the record doesn’t necessarily feature any absolutely ‘pop’ moments, it does dance lightly around the ideas of composition as a whole, and plays between tightly arranged boppy vocals, hard-panned and spoken delivery that harkens to retro advertisement, complex but articulate instrument melodies that blend jazz and psych-rock, and absolute pitfalls into chaos like the (in my opinion) epicenter of the album, ‘It’s Really Important’ where the narrator pleads with the listener to understand: “It’s - okay - it’s - you know it’s really - *crying sounds* *laughing sounds* *screaming sounds* It’s really just simple. Please. Please. Please.” ‘Coulture’ is, of course, not simple at all. But it does so much work to invite the listener into the space it’s creating, which is both as familiar as old ‘I Love Lucy’ episodes and as complex and unique as a dream being described by a friend, that anyone with any associations to American media circa 1950 - 1980 are going to have a certain emotional response to the content presented, but not be prepared for it. This album is a dialogue, largely between the artists involved in it’s production, but also with the consumer, that begins with the fractioned and digitally-augmented cover art that screams ‘classic’ with it’s vapor-wave color scheme and faux dust and scuffs, and bleeds into the ‘hands-off’ production, which feels very much like this is happening in a room in front of you, but with the occasional modern touch of panning or modulation that reminds you how self-aware the production is as a whole. The conversation this album wants to have is complicated, but not serious. It’s absolutely one of the headiest things I’ve ever experienced, and I’m barely able to even touch on the nuance of the music itself. If ever there was a record to hang in an art gallery, this is it.

Overall Rating: 4/5 skateboarding skeletons (My 5 point system, detailed) 1. Is it well produced? (The recording sometimes leaves me wishing for a bit of overall mastering push, but then the idea that the ‘implied room’ is so clean begins to become central to the album. So... call it a draw?) 2. Is it an album, not just a collection of songs? (Dear lord, yes) 3. Is it challenging itself / it’s genre expectations? (More than anything I’ve heard in a long time) 4. Does it say something? (Immaculately) 5. Do I personally like it? (This is too complicated to enter regular rotation for me, but I respect it)

[atomictiki]

What other Eighties cartoons were/are you into?

Well now that’s an interesting question. I’ll constrain myself to cartoons that were made in the 80s versus those that were shown ad nauseum in the 80s that I kinda loved (sorry Spider-Man ‘67). Obviously excluding The Mighty Orbots which I assume spawned this question.

Belle & Sebastian

Long before they were a hipster band the original story by Cécile Aubrywas brought to the small screenthrough the anime lens of TOHO animation,Keiji Hayakawa, as a kid I often got it confused with…

Heidi: Girl of the Alps

Again a Japanese produced European story brought to Canada via the Netherlands, I believe Hayao Miyazaki was involved with this one, shown on TVO in my formative years. This may explain my future love for Lupin and Urusei Yatsura.

Astro Boy

The 1980s Astro Boy (Mighty Atom) was legendary for many reasons, mainly because it looked amazing compared to most contemporary shows and also because it had a sort of quaint perspective to it (it was re-telling many of the 1960s plots) it was a very upbeat show but also still very cool. As Marty McFly noted all the best stuff comes from Japan and Astro Boy was one of those things.

He-Man

If you were a boy in the 80s this was absolutely a show you would watch - it was a force to be reckoned with - nearly unbelievable that they could mess up the move so badly, I blame the movie for destroying the series. Speaking of movies that destroyed your childhood…

Transformers

Transformers was absolutely massive in 1983/4 like you can’t comprehend how big it was, I kinda get Turtlemania that happened late in the 80s but man Transformers was the shit. It had a following before it had a cartoon, that’s sayin’ something for those days

Consequently Transformers the Movie was nightmare fuel for all us kids who saw every one of our faves destroyed systematically. At the tender age of 9 I gave it a pass because I think I fell in love with Arcee. If you are a giant Princess Leia lookin’ pink robot mom please call me I love u

The Raccoons

Canada struggled for many many years with an identity crisis mainly purported by Ottawa but one of the cartoons that was quintessentially Canadian but didn’t completely reek of the NFB was The Raccoons, On CBC every Sunday before The Magical World of Disney was a little show about a messy, hockey jersey wearing trashbear named Bert (and his friends)

Inspector Gadget

Inspector Gadget was a very trippy show when I think back on it, I mean nobody really questioned his gadgets or his goofy attitude. I wouldn’t understand the references to The Pink Panther or even know who Don Adams was (Get Smart) until much later in life. It was just a constant on Canadian TV especially the first season. Penny who was voiced by the incomparable Cree Summer was the brains behind the decidedly bumbling man. Dr. Claw was one of the most iconic villains ever but not enough is said about the hilarious henchmen “you could take the north      fork      road……. OR you could take the      south          fork         road…) augh good times!

Dennis the Menace

Dennis the Menace was one of those weird cartoons that was absolutely based on an American comic strip, but produced in Japan with an almost certainly European dub… I don’t remember much from that show other than watching it at every opportunity and being somewhat attracted to Alice Mitchell… I can’t explain it and I havne’t seen it on DVD ever after so … I dunno what i would think about it today. I vividly remember the intro sequence though.

Of course the 80s rolled on and things got kinda bleak for a while occasionally they would brighten up for short periods with the odd Garfield special (then later its own series) but then in 1987 the clouds parted and we were graced with…

Mighty Mouse the New Adventures

Now you can absolutely judge the likes of Ralph Bakshi and John K through the lens of history all you want but FINALLY a GOOD cartoon surfaced from the ashes of 80s garbage and was actually FUNNY??? Like honest to god your whole family would laugh at this shit hilarious?? I know plenty of people who gave this show a wide berth but goddamn it was hilarious in 1987 and it still holds up. You think Tiny Toons or Animaniacs was edgy for its time you have no idea. Heck there’s an episode where they take a dump on the crap animation that was bopping around at the same time.

And like everything else good it was cancelled for being too awesome (won’t talk about Pee-Wee’s Playhouse it wasn’t animated but it was around at the same time and given the boot for nonsensical reasons)

The 80s kinda wound down a bit, falling back into the same ol’ formulaic pablum. At this point the only real show was…

Garfield and Friends

It was edgy to the very limited degree it was allowed to be, making fun of mini-malls and disco still being dead but it worked in its very limited zone and at the time I loved it unironically however creeping in the very early hours of the day was…

The Super Mario Brothers Super Show

I used to get up at 6 AM to watch this shit and man it was super worth it, my sister would sneak into my room and we’d watch the show together on the ol’ rabbit ears at the lowest volume the dial would permit. Friday’s were special because that was Legend of Zelda day and despite not having played Zelda yet I totally fell in love with Link, Zelda, Sprite, Ganon and the rest, what a world it was back then. We didn’t get a NES until 1989 and man what a life changer that was. So many good times… eventually it lead into Captain N but that was the 90s. But what else was cookin’ at the time? Oh yeah a little cartoon by the name of …

Beetlejuice

I had seen the cable edit of Beetejuice on TV so I knew sorta what I was in for but the cartoon was just… really charming and fun. The relationship the characters had together was unforgettable and I still look back at that show with a lot of nostalgia.

Anyway this post is getting long and I’m sure I’ve forgotten a few things I absolutely loved (Wind in the Willows? The Real Ghostbusters? TMNT?) but I should stop before I fall into a coma or something. I highly recommend all these shows TBH

[djesusgetnaked]

51, 54, 56

51. Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?

Yeees. I have five of them.

My first is a black panther, German expressionism style, on the left side of my belly. Based on this painting, that I absolutely love. She (I just decided my panther is a female idk) also has a chain around her neck. And it’s my favorite tattoo.

I have a sort of a code on my right arm, which said “dessine-moi”. In English it means “draw-me”, but it’s referred to the famous quote of “Le Petit Prince” by Antoine de Saint Exupéry, which is “dessine-moi un mouton”.

I have an anchor with holding hands on my right arm too. You can see this one here.

I have a hand rolling dices on my right thigh.

And I have a triangle on my right hand. It was supposed to be a symbol for the lgbt community, like two triangles, one pink and the other blue, but I was very high and very drunk. Not made by my tattoo artist but by a friend, and when you drink you bleed much more. So it’s just a triangle on my hand which looks like a drawing of a little kid and I like it anyway.

54. Can you play any musical instruments? If so, which ones?

My dad taught me the bass when I was very young, and then I learnt to play the guitar. So I guess I play the guitar and the bass, but not very well in my opinion.

56. Last CD you bought?

I honestly don’t remember. I don’t buy, I’m all for download ahah. And now I have Spotify premium so…But I think it was for the birthday of a friend, I bought him some amazing soundtracks, like Kick-Ass for example.

Ily

[unfriendlygreen]

TJ KAPLAN-ALTMAN is a TWENTY-ONE year old SEVENTH YEAR at Age of Heroes Academy who looks a lot like CODY CHRISTIAN. HE identifies as CIS MALE and rumor has it they’re the adopted child of BILLY KAPLAN & TEDDY ALTMAN. They’re described as DETERMINED & FEROCIOUS and got into the academy due to their ability of EXPERT SHAPESHIFTING & SUPERSKRULL ENHANCEMENT. Their moral alignment is CHAOTIC EVIL. 

found in a pod in the space equivalent of a dumpster, tj was picked up by teddy and some how teddy did not throw him further into space - bless up.

tj is of skrull descent though after being biologically engineered to manipulate fire, absorb kinetic energy, and limited manipulation of force fields. he trained tirelessly as a child, training as a skrull soldier until the lab he was hosted in was raided and he was shoved into an escape pod with coordinates over 300 clicks away. somewhere between 245 and 300 clicks he lost consciousness and the pod fell into hibernation mode. its unclear how long he slept for but he awoke when his pod was opened by teddy altman. adopting his name, tj assimilated into the kaplan-altman lifestyle -- side eyeing the weakness love that the pair flaunted so shamelessly. with time he grew to want something like that, something like his parents had, though the skrull military training that hums in the back of his mind tells him to resist such an obvious achilles’ heel.

ABILITIES

skrull military training - hand-to-hand combat, though he was a kid ya dig so like he’s just extra pretty good at it now and he works diligently and took up mma awhile back so he still good.

fire manipulation - he can project fire from his extremities in ranging intensities, and create, shape, and manipulate existing fire/flames. as a result tj runs hotter than most but he cannot set his entire self alight like johnny storm. he has adept control of this skill from his training as a young child. 

kinetic energy absorption - tj can absorb kinetic energy, removing it from its source and then turn around and use it to enhance his own physical strength, speed, and stamina. as he takes on more hits he metabolizes it to his own advantage and that makes him an excellent field soldier. he absorbs energy not only from punches but also projectiles like bullets and physically based energy beams. ( * he discovered this later on, most likely once he was already at the academy. could be a funny, but not so cute meet-cute or something )

limited force field manipulation - he can create force fields around himself and those in his immediate area. his current radius is 10 feet in any direction. with proximity he can penetration other’s force fields or even break them entirely with focus.

shapeshifting - like any other skrull he can shapeshift, it ain’t special though as a kid he would test his abilities time and time again, turning into furniture or creepily large pencils. sometimes if a movie is particularly boring ( or just not what he’s into ) he’ll study the actors and take on their appearance.

the skrull can like, stretch and like, become rubbery or something. ya girl is not great at summarizing and we made it this far so like. we should be mcfucking grateful that i didn’t pull a graham here. im just being more thorough bc he’s a student and ya gonna see him all the time so ya gotta know what he be like okay. 

they can change size, fly, and mimic sounds and voices bc the skrull are like *pink panther theme plays* s p i e s 

back to tj now, he won’t tell anyone his real name so might as well call him tj. you can try to guess that’d be fun. but he’ll neither confirm or deny. i’d love a running gag where everyone assumes they know his name because one time his eyebrow did a thing when i asked if his name was toenail so i’m pretty sure its toenail or something like that bc at the end of the day im a fucking meme. 

PERSONALITY --

determined is just a nice way to say stubborn. once tj’s mind is made up you could show him a 74 slide powerpoint and he’d dismiss the whole thing. but if its something he doesn’t have an opinion of he’s pretty go with the flow.

ferocious - savagely fierce, cruel, or violent. he comes from a warrior race, fighting is in his blood though he only fights for what he wants and believes in. 

his moral alignment is chaotic evil and he has no respect for rules, other people's lives, or anything but his own desires, which are typically selfish. he has a tendency to be cruel when other’s don’t agree with him and its his instinct to lash out though with parenting his tantrum phase has kind of.. mellowed unless he knows his dads aren’t around to stop him. he absolutely does not mean well but he likes anyone who he thinks is along his same wavelength.

if you powered through this whole thing oh my fucking god, wow. ily but like... love urself, you know you can ask me questions at anytime. the only reason this is so extensive is so that i can refer back to this to refresh myself.  anyway, you know the drill, like this to plot and after work i will be hitting everyone up. 

he’s open to all connections rn except like. his dads, duh, so feel free to send me whatever ideas you might have been wanting. i got a few things to do tonight but like otherwise i will be lingering around for the next hour and then after that i’ll be on after work ( in 6 hours ) okay okay im done. sorry for how long this is, again. seriously.