#and that i’ll hurt her feelings by telling her to stop
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freakycore · 3 days ago
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🎧 now playing: queen never cry
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ryomen sukuna x fem!reader
sukuna’s queen should never cry. so when he finds her in tears, he’s ready to unleash his wrath— only to be met with a situation he never expected.
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sukuna never believed there was a force in this world that could bring him to his knees— until he saw you crying.
the faint sound of muffled sniffles greeted him as he stepped into your shared chambers. his crimson eyes narrowed, searching for the source. then he saw you, perched on the edge of the bed, your face buried in your hands, shoulders trembling with each shaky breath.
his chest tightened, a feeling he didn’t recognize—or perhaps refused to admit—clawing at his heart. who dared to hurt her? his jaw clenched, and his cursed energy began to crackle in the air.
“who did this to you?” sukuna’s voice thundered through the room, sharp and biting, his rage barely contained. “tell me, and I’ll flay them alive. I’ll make them beg for—”
“it’s not a person!” you interrupted, looking up at him with teary eyes.
his fury faltered for a moment as confusion replaced it. he stalked closer, crouching before you so he could see your face. his large hands cupped your cheeks, rough thumbs brushing away stray tears. “then what is it?” he growled.
your lip quivered as you tried to form the words. “i… i dropped my favorite dessert.”
sukuna blinked. once. twice. his expression was blank, but his crimson eyes burned with disbelief.
“you’re crying… over that?”
“yes!” you wailed, fresh tears spilling over. “it was the last one, and i was saving it for today! and now it’s gone!”
the room was silent for a beat. sukuna’s hands dropped from your face as he straightened, his cursed energy dissipating into the air. he crossed his arms, his lips pressing into a tight line as his eyes bore into you. “you mean to tell me i nearly destroyed this entire palace… over a shit of sugar?”
you sniffed, your watery gaze meeting his. “it was a really good shit of sugar..”
for a moment, sukuna said nothing, his temple visibly throbbing as he tried to process the situation. then he let out a harsh, frustrated groan, dragging a hand down his face. “you’re insufferable,” he muttered.
despite his irritation, he reached out and pulled you into his lap, cradling you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. “stop crying,” he ordered, voice gruff but quieter now. “queens never shed tears over something pathetic.”
you let out a soft laugh, burying your face in his chest. “you’re so cute when you’re mad.”
sukuna froze, his scowl deepening. “excuse me?”
“ you heard me,” you teased, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. your fingers lightly traced the sharp lines of his jaw, and despite himself, sukuna leaned into your touch.
“you’re lucky i adore you,” he muttered under his breath, his arms tightening around you protectively. “otherwise, i’d throw you out for being this ridiculous.”
but as much as he grumbled, you knew he wasn’t truly angry. later that evening, when he thought you weren’t paying attention, sukuna disappeared for a short while. he returned with a boxes containing even larger, more decadent version of your lost dessert.
he didn’t say a word as he set them all down before you, his expression carefully neutral. but the slight twitch of his lips betrayed him when you squealed with delight and launched yourself into his arms.
no one makes his queen cry— not even herself.
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woso-story · 1 day ago
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Bad Driver
Alexia Putellas x Reader
It was a crisp Friday evening, and the anticipation of date night had you buzzing with excitement. Alexia, your longtime girlfriend and the love of your life, was getting ready in the bedroom while you paced the living room. The plan was to drive to your favorite restaurant, where you’d made reservations days in advance. Usually, Alexia drove her sleek Cupra, but tonight, you felt a spark of rebellion—you wanted to drive for once.
When Alexia emerged, radiant in a fitted blazer and her signature confidence, you smiled and said, "Babe, I’ll drive tonight."
Her eyebrows shot up. "You? Drive?" she asked, her tone light but her expression anything but.
“Yes, me. Why not? You always drive. Let me take the wheel this time,” you replied, grinning.
But Alexia didn’t hand over the keys. Instead, she shook her head with a nervous laugh. “No, no. It’s fine. I’ll drive.”
Confused, you stepped closer. "Why not? It’s not like I’m a bad driver or anything."
She hesitated, her gaze darting away. "It’s not that. I just… prefer to drive myself, that’s all."
Her response only deepened your suspicion. You crossed your arms and gave her a pointed look. “Alexia, you’re a terrible liar. Just tell me the truth.”
Alexia sighed, running a hand through her hair. After a long pause, she finally muttered, barely above a whisper, “I don’t think you’re the best driver.”
Your jaw dropped. “What?”
She winced, clearly regretting her words. "It’s not a big deal! It’s just… every time you drive, I get a little nervous."
“Nervous?” you echoed, bewildered. “Why would you be nervous? I’m a good driver."
Alexia bit her lip, as if debating whether to continue. Finally, she said, “Well, you’re often over the speed limit. And you’re late on the brakes… like, really late. Sometimes I think we’re going to hit the car in front of us. Oh, and there was that time you drove over the curb and scratched my rims. Twice.”
Your cheeks burned with embarrassment. “You noticed that?”
She gave you a sheepish smile. “I… might have had them repaired. Twice.”
Her confession hit you hard. You couldn’t believe you’d never noticed how nervous she felt. The thought that she didn’t trust you to drive her car made your heart sink. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“Because I didn’t want to hurt your feelings,” Alexia said softly, stepping closer. “You’re amazing at so many things, mi princesa. Just… maybe not driving.”
Her attempt to lighten the mood didn’t land. You felt embarrassed and hurt, retreating into silence. The drive to the restaurant was quiet, the usual easy conversation replaced by an awkward tension. Even dinner felt different, with you picking at your food and Alexia watching you with worried eyes.
---
The dimly lit restaurant, usually your haven of laughter and love, felt muted. Alexia’s gentle attempts to pull you out of your shell failed to break through. Her jokes felt forced, and her compliments only deepened your self-consciousness. As dessert arrived, Alexia reached across the table to take your hand. "I’m sorry if I upset you. That wasn’t my intention."
You nodded, offering a small smile that didn’t reach your eyes. "I know. It’s just… hard to hear."
As you left the restaurant, Alexia stopped you by her car. “Here,” she said, holding out the keys.
“What?” you asked, frowning.
“You’re driving us home,” she said, her tone firm.
You shook your head. “No way. I’m not doing it now."
“I had a little too much to drink,” she countered, giving you a small smile. “It’s up to you now.”
You hesitated, suddenly suspicious. “Was this your plan all along? Get me to drive so you can complain about how bad I am?”
Alexia laughed, but her expression softened. “No, I just want to show you that I trust you. You’ve got this.”
With a sigh, you took the keys and got into the driver’s seat. The drive home was smooth, largely because you were hyper-focused on every move—checking mirrors, braking early, and staying well under the speed limit. Alexia’s amused glances didn’t go unnoticed.
“You’re doing great,” she said, her voice full of warmth.
For the first time that evening, you felt a flicker of pride. That is, until you reached the garage of your apartment complex. As you turned the corner, Alexia shouted, “Careful!” but it was too late. The screeching sound of metal against concrete filled the air.
Your heart sank as you parked and got out to inspect the damage. Sure enough, the rim was scratched—again. Tears welled up in your eyes as you turned to Alexia. “I’m so sorry. I’ll pay for the repair this time.”
Alexia walked over and pulled you into a comforting hug. “It’s okay, mi amor. It’s just a rim.”
“But I ruined it… again,” you mumbled into her chest, tears streaming down your face.
“Shh,” she soothed, stroking your hair. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re perfect to me, rims and all.”
---
Back in the apartment, Alexia made you tea and held you close on the couch. Slowly, your embarrassment faded. She didn’t try to fix the situation with words; instead, her steady presence spoke volumes. The warmth of her embrace and the rhythm of her heartbeat calmed you.
“Thank you for being so patient with me,” you said quietly, your voice thick with emotion.
She kissed the top of your head. “Always. I love you.”
“I love you too,” you replied, snuggling into her.
After a few minutes of silence, a laugh escaped you. Alexia tilted her head, curious. “What’s so funny?”
“I always wondered why you never let me drive,” you said, grinning. “Now I know.”
She chuckled, pulling you closer. “You’re the perfect passenger princess, mi amor. Let me drive you wherever you want to go.”
Smiling, you nestled into her embrace, the tension of the evening finally dissolving. With Alexia, you knew you were safe—in love, in life, and yes, even in the passenger seat.
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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 days ago
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Crash Into Me
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Summary: A snow storm is coming down hard and the reader is attempting to clear the driveway of snow before Dean gets home from a long shift. But one wrong move can change their whole night...
Pairing: Doctor!Dean x reader
Word Count: 2,000ish
Warnings: language, head injury/body injuries, mention of car accident
A/N: Fun fact, this story takes place in the same world as one of my previous fics. We'll see if anyone can figure it out 😉
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You were panting by the time you’d made your third pass down the driveway with the shovel. Shit, you should have gotten the snowblower out. The snow had looked light but it was wet and heavy underneath, too heavy to push effectively. Plus it was coming down hard, the wind whipping more and more. Dean was due home in less than twenty minutes and you needed to clear it out if he wanted a chance of getting his truck in the drive.
Alright, you’d get the thing out of the back and clear off some room before it got too high.
Not two steps towards the garage, you felt your boot slip on some black ice and you stumbled backwards, cold hitting your back the last thing you registered before it all went black.
With a silent groan, you fluttered open your eyes, finding yourself staring up at the roof of Dean’s truck.
“Oh that’s not good,” you muttered, finding one of Dean’s hands touching your hand, his fiery hot in it.
“Y/N? Sweetheart?” You winced as you sat up, finding Dean turned back in the drivers seat, watching you carefully. “Take it easy. You have a concussion. You were out about sixty seconds from what I could tell.”
“What joy,” you grumbled, holding a hand to the back of your head and hissing. He squeezed your other hand, your gaze locking onto his. “S’just a bump-”
“I was just pulling up the road when I saw you go down and you were lights out. We’re going to the hospital.” You opened your mouth to argue but he growled. “Do you remember that massive car accident you were in eight years ago? How your doctor, me, told you to take any head injuries seriously? Hm?”
“Fine, we’ll go,” you sighed.
“That’s my stubborn girl,” he said, letting go of your hand when you hit an icy patch on the road. “We’ll need to take it slow. Let me know if-”
“Yes, Dr. Winchester,” you said dramatically, feeling an ache in your side you hadn’t before from the adrenaline coursing through you. It was quiet in the truck as Dean drove back to work. The roads were a mess and it was coming down even harder. You weren’t exactly expecting to get out of there quickly but you knew you’d have to wait for a break in the weather before Dean would be able to get back on the road again.
“There we go,” said Dean as he barely drove into the employee parking garage, your eyes darting out the window to see a pair of nurses and a doctor with a stretcher waiting by the elevator. Again, you wanted to argue you were fine to walk but your side was really starting to hurt and you had a feeling you’d bruised the ribs you broke in your accident years ago.
“Well if it ain’t my favorite Winchester,” said Benny, opening the back door for you. 
“Hey, Ben,” you said, slipping out of the car before anyone could stop you. You sat down on the stretcher, Benny nodding to the nurses.
“I’ll be down in the ER in two minutes, sweetheart,” said Dean as you waved him off. 
“I got her, worry wart,” said Benny, shutting the door for you, wrapping his white coat around himself as he trailed after you on the stretcher. It was much warmer in the elevator, Benny shaking the cold off and cocking his head at you suspiciously. “So. How bad does it hurt?”
“My head,” you said quietly. You pointed to your ribs and right hip. “This whole side aches. It feels like when I broke my ribs.”
“Alright. We’ll get you taken care of. Hopefully it’s just a bad bruise.” You tried to relax on the way downstairs, Benny getting you in a room off of the ER where the less intense cases were evaluated. After only a slight argument, you convinced him that you could take off your clothes on your own. You weren’t about to let them cut through your brand new winter jacket.
By the time you were down to your bra and underwear, Dean was walking inside, pouting as he noticed the deep bruises on your skin over some of your old scars.
“You are going to go stand in that corner and let me work,” Benny said to him as he and the two nurses gently rolled you to your side to examine your back. “Alright, we’ll take you for x-rays but my gut says bruised ribs is all. Your concussion is more concerning to me considering your previous accident.”
“What does that mean?” you asked, Benny shining a light in your eyes.
“Just means I want to have you observed for a bit. We’ll do a quick MRI but I’m guessing you’re perfectly fine. Just a little concussion,” said Benny as the doors to the room burst open. Your gaze shot over, Benny still checking your jaw as Dean glanced at the nurse in dark blue scrubs by the door.
“Dr. Winchester! ER 3 needs a surgeon and Dr. Zacariah just busted his ankle in the lobby on some melted snow.”
“Go,” you said to Dean his body already moving after her but his gaze on you. “Now, Dean.”
“Benny, you make sure she’s fine!” shouted Dean on his way out, loud footsteps echoing down the hall. Benny smirked when he was gone, feeling the goose egg at the back of your head.
“Little shit forgets I graduated ahead of him in med school,” he chuckled, running a hand over your head when he finished. “Okay. Everything looks minor. We’ll run some tests and get you admitted upstairs. Kline.”
“Yes, doctor?” asked the young nurse that’d been in with you. Benny hummed.
“Put Mrs. Winchester at the front of the line for MRI and x-rays behind non-critical patients. Stay with her for the night. I have a feeling with the weather, Dr. Winchester is going to be working awhile.” 
“You should go help, Benny,” you said, nodding towards the door. “It’s icy out and I’m sure you’ll have way worse cases than mine to deal with. Go on.”
“Watch her,” said Benny to Kline as sirens sounded outside again. He took off with the other nurse, leaving you alone with the young man.
“So,” you said, sitting up with a wince. “Let’s get me taken care of so you can get back to helping people.”
“I’m sorry ma'am, but I’m not about to piss off some of the most important doctors in the hospital,” he said. “Let me get you on the schedule so we can get you somewhere quieter.”
Six Hours Later
“Hey, Y/N,” said Garth. You popped your head up from your book in the surgical staff lounge and gave him a smile. “Heard you took a fall. How you feeling?”
“Oh, they discharged me a few hours ago. A few bruised ribs and a minor concussion. I heard there was a huge pile up on the highway so I told them to give my bed to someone who needs it.”
“Which only happened because I offered to watch her outside of a room,” said Jack, who was working on charts at a table nearby. “Sorry for working in here. I know non-surgical staff aren’t allowed.”
“No worries, kiddo,” said Garth, going to the coffee machine and pouring a large cup. “I need to take a lunch. Why don’t you head on back to the ER? I’ll keep an eye on her.”
“Thanks,” he said, gathering his tablet and notepad. “I’ll be back in awhile.”
You gave him a wave, Garth taking his seat when he was gone. He stretched in his chair, closing his eyes. “I’m surprised you’re not in surgery.”
“I was the past sixteen hours. Need some food and a few hours of sleep,” he said, glancing up at the clock. “Surprised Dean’s still on his feet. Didn’t he just work a double?”
“Triple,” you sighed, rubbing the back of your head, the swelling gone down thankfully. “He was only meant to do 8 hours and that turned into 24 when Dr. Alastair got sick so Dean covered his shift and then there was an accident. He never even made it into the house.”
“Good news is I’m pretty sure his surgery is wrapping up. Bad news is with the storm not everyone can make it in for their shifts.”
“Anything I can do to help?” you asked. Garth raised an eyebrow. “Come on. We both know I don’t need a babysitter or Benny wouldn’t have discharged me. I’m a little tired and have a headache and can’t lift anything but I can do something I’m sure. I mean I’m stuck here until this storm is over too. I know how much it sucks to be stuck in the hospital.”
“Let me talk to the floor nurse, see if we can find something.”
Two Hours Later
You grinned when Dean wandered into the ICU in a pair of clean scrubs. His green eyes were barely open but he was smiling when he found you coloring with a young girl who’d been in an accident with her mom.
“Dr. Winchester,” said the woman in bed quietly, Dean giving her hand a squeeze. 
“I’m surprised you remember me from the ER,” he said, eyes settling on the young girl. “You taking care of your mom for me?”
She hummed, going back to her coloring as you stood slowly. “I told Darcy about how good a doctor you are from my own personal experience.”
“Ah, well, you weren’t in quite as bad of shape,” said Dean, glancing at the monitors for a moment. “Dr. Mills told me your surgery went well. Hopefully we can get you moved out of ICU in a few hours and home in a few days. Mind if I borrow, Y/N?”
“Take her. And thank you again for keeping an eye on my daughter,” she said. 
“Anytime,” you said, Dean tucking you under his shoulders before escorting you out. He hummed, gently tapping the side of your head when you reached the elevators. “Listen. I know you wanted me to stay here and coloring isn’t that strenuous, I promise.”
“Ribs. Concussion. Hip-”
“Dean, I’m fine-”
“Thigh. Ass,” he smirked, gently rubbing your side. “That was a hard fucking fall and you need to rest.”
“I did! I promise,” you said, Dean chuckling.
“Always were a stubborn patient,” he said, the doors nearly closing when you spotted Gabe sneak inside. He gave you two a look, pretending to gag. “This is why you’re single.”
“By choice,” he said, holding up a finger. “And I’m getting the hell out of this building before I get pulled into another disaster. You two want a lift home on account of the head trauma and you looking like death warmed over?”
Dean flipped him off as you pushed his hand down. “Thank you Gabe, we appreciate it.”
“Anytime.”
Approximately nine hours after Dean was meant to get home, you and Dean trudged inside the house, leaving the snow in the driveway to be dealt with later. You were hungry and sore and less than a minute inside, you were under the covers in bed, Dean crawling in beside you.
“Wake me up if you feel nauseous or your head hurts more or-” You pressed a finger to his lips, shushing him into closing his eyes. “Bossy.”
“Sleep-deprived,” you said, pecking a kiss on his lips that he was too exhausted to return. “I promise you can dote on me when we wake up as much as you want. I won’t even complain that much.”
“You better not,” he mumbled. “Love you.”
“Love you too, Dean.”
_____________
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clarii · 1 day ago
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Off Limits Part 2
Summary: JJ Maybank has always had a crush on John B’s sister, and the feeling is mutual. But when JJ finally musters the courage to ask John B for permission to date her, the answer is a firm no. Determined not to ruin his friendship with John B, JJ pulls away completely, leaving her confused and heartbroken.
Pairings: JJ Maybank x Reader, John B & JJ friendship, Pogues & reader friendship, John B & Reader Siblings relationship
Warnings: Angst, drinking, hurt/comfort, protective sibling, pining, unresolved feelings
Author’s note: Here’s the long awaited part two. I hope you guys enjoy. Since I feel bad for making you guys wait for this, I will post another JJ Maybank story after this one.
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The night felt endless. The ache in your chest was unbearable, your heart still pounding from the way JJ’s voice had cracked, the pain in his eyes when he admitted he was in love with you. And then he was just… gone.
You were still standing on the porch, arms tightly crossed around yourself, trying to catch your breath when John B finally spoke behind you.
“Y/N…” His voice was quiet, hesitant.
You spun around, eyes sharp as you glared at your brother. “Don’t. Just don’t.”
He raised his hands defensively. “I’m sorry. I—”
“No, John B, you don’t get to just say sorry like it fixes this!” you snapped, voice trembling as you stepped closer. “You—you did this. You ruined everything.”
John B’s face twisted with guilt, but you were too far gone to stop now.
“You had no right to tell him to stay away from me! Do you know what it’s been like? To have someone who made me feel so—so safe just disappear? To have him act like I didn’t exist when I—” Your voice broke, tears slipping down your cheeks despite your best efforts.
John B swallowed hard. “I thought I was protecting you—”
“Protecting me from what? Someone who loves me? Someone who’s been there for me more than anyone else has?”
He opened his mouth, but you shook your head, voice trembling.
“Do you know what it’s like to lose your other half? Because that’s what it feels like, JB.” Your voice cracked, raw and broken. “I feel like a part of me has been missing. I can’t stop thinking about him. Every bonfire, every time I’m at the beach, even here—it all just feels wrong without him.”
John B blinked rapidly, clearly shaken by your words.
“I’m in love with him, John B,” you whispered, voice trembling. “And you took that away from me.”
For a long moment, the only sound was the waves crashing faintly in the distance, your breath shaky and uneven as you wiped at your face.
Finally, John B exhaled shakily, running a hand down his face.
“I didn’t know…” he whispered. “I didn’t know it was hurting you this much.”
You gave a bitter laugh, arms dropping to your sides. “Yeah, well. It is.”
Silence again. Then John B nodded, jaw tightening with determination.
“I’ll fix this.”
It took John B almost an hour to track JJ down.
He found him in his usual spot—the docks, knees pulled to his chest, face buried in his arms. His whole body was tense, shoulders rising and falling with each uneven breath.
John B approached cautiously.
“Hey…” His voice was softer than usual, guilt heavy in every word.
JJ didn’t even flinch. “Just go away, man. I’m not in the mood.”
John B shook his head. “No. I’m not leaving. Not until we talk.”
JJ finally lifted his head, his face pale, eyes red and glassy. His voice was hollow when he spoke.
“What’s there to talk about? You made it pretty clear, didn’t you?”
John B’s face twisted. “JJ… I was wrong.”
That made him pause. JJ blinked, brow furrowing in disbelief.
“I thought I was doing the right thing,” John B continued, voice thick. “I thought I was protecting her from getting hurt. But I wasn’t. I was hurting both of you.”
JJ looked away, jaw clenching, his voice low and bitter.
“You don’t get it, man. You don’t get what it’s like to feel like you’re drowning every time you see her and can’t—” His voice broke, and he shook his head. “I can’t breathe without her. She’s… everything. And not being near her? It’s killing me.”
John B stared, guilt tightening in his chest as he realized the full extent of the damage.
JJ’s voice dropped to a whisper. “She’s my person, JB. My other half. And you made me feel like I wasn’t good enough for her.”
John B shook his head quickly. “I was wrong. I see that now. She told me everything, man. How much she’s hurting too. She feels the same way—like she’s missing a part of herself. And it’s you.”
JJ’s breath hitched, his eyes widening.
“She loves you, JJ. She told me.”
JJ’s voice cracked. “She… she said that?”
John B nodded firmly. “Yeah. And I was a jerk for standing in the way of that. If you love her—really love her—go to her. Don’t let me be the reason you lose her.”
JJ didn’t move at first, his mind racing, heart pounding in his chest. Then, without another word, he was up—running.
You were still sitting on the porch, knees pulled to your chest, watching the moonlight ripple across the water when you heard footsteps again.
JJ.
His breathing was uneven, hair damp from the mist, like he’d run straight here.
You stood slowly, heart in your throat.
“JJ—”
But he was already closing the distance between you, his eyes desperate, voice cracking as he spoke.
“I’m so sorry. I never should’ve listened to him. I never should’ve pushed you away. I thought I was doing what was best—but it just—It hurt so much, Y/N.”
Your breath caught, tears already welling again.
“I missed you,” you whispered.
JJ shook his head, stepping even closer. His hands cupped your face, thumbs brushing away the tears spilling down your cheeks. His voice was so soft, so raw.
“I love you, Y/N. I’m in love with you. And I don’t care what anyone else thinks. You’re my person.”
A sob caught in your throat as you whispered back, “I love you too, JJ. I always have. I—”
You didn’t even get to finish before his lips were on yours.
The kiss was everything you’d been holding back—all the pain, all the longing—poured into the way he held you. His arms wrapped tightly around you, pulling you closer like he was afraid you’d slip away again.
When you finally broke apart, foreheads pressed together, both of you breathless, JJ whispered so softly it almost broke you.
“I’m never pushing you away again.”
You smiled through the tears, pressing your lips against his once more.
“Promise?”
His blue eyes softened, filled with nothing but love.
“Promise.”
Taglist: @lillell467, @mariamadison6-blog, @jesschalamet, @8767knockknock, @alimarie1105, @stylesbarnesmaybankstarkeymunson,@qtbananas, @buckyssbestgirl, @dearestceciliaa
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littlestarbigsky · 3 days ago
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The Asthma Attack Stevepop was absolutely amazing!!! Also, hahaa, I made the request because you started posting Asthma Sodapop things,
Is there anything with Two-Bit and Marcia that you would want to write? (Any Headcanons for Two-Bit or Marcia that's similar in nature to being sick or hurting or something happening and the other being able to help?)
Sorry, I don't know if this makes much sense,
- 🍀
my mind decided to wander a little (a lot) with this one💗 i wrote this chetcherrycola fic not too long ago and hinted at marbit in it and then this request came in like two days later sooooo i had no choice ;)
cw: they end up in the bath together and marcia washes two-bit’s hair, nothing sexual but it’s definitely intimate, perhaps not entirely sfw
hope this is okay🩷
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her heart was pounding heavily in her chest as she hurried home from cherry’s house, umbrella open and her jacket fastened tightly around her. she could feel the rain seeping into her new suede shoes, her parents would probably kill her if they noticed…
“did soda make it to cherry’s?” a voice asked, and she already knew whose it was.
marcia saw his silhouette slouched on her front steps before she saw his face, and yet there was still that sick feeling in her stomach telling her that something was wrong. it only got worse as she got closer and finally saw how much of a mess he was.
“oh my god,” she sprinted forward, her kitten heels almost falling off as she ran. “oh, sweetheart…”
two-bit looked up at her, and it felt like a lead weight had dropped into her stomach. he was soaked to the bone, his curly hair plastered to his forehead. it seemed like his entire body was littered with bruises, his face covered in blood and one of his eyes was swollen shut.
“i…” he winced, but cut himself off as the split in his lip tightened and she hurried forward, making sure he was fully covered by the awning as her cold fingers fiddled with her house keys.
“shh,” she hushed him, a hand grazing over his cheek as she unlocked the front door. “here, get inside.”
he pushed himself off the stairs and onto his feet with a sharp gasp, limping through the door and stopping on the doormat. he started to wipe his boots off as marcia kicked off her shoes and hurried further inside to the bathroom, coming back with a couple of towels. she wrapped one of them around his shoulders, using another to start drying his curls and wiping away some of the blood splattered across his face.
“what happened?” she asked, trying her best to be gentle with him as she guided him over to sit on the stairs. “it was just a rumble… you’ve never been this roughed up before…”
his big brown doe eyes gazed up at her and blinked sadly, “they found us… me ‘n soda… he managed to get them off pretty fast but they…”
he winced, and she sat down on the stair just above him, rubbing his back and running her hand along his sleeve of tattoos. he sucked his teeth for a moment before stuttering out, “they had me pinned down. you can’t wear rings in a rumble… but apparently you can when you’re jumping someone after.”
marcia felt sick to her stomach, so much that she couldn’t speak for a few moments, but she still asked slowly, “it was trip… wasn’t it?”
he grimaced and looked away before nodding slightly. marcia felt tears in her eyes, she felt guilty, heartbroken, angry, and none of it could help him.
“i’m sorry,” she gasped, tenderly pulling him into her arms, his head resting in her lap. “i’m so sorry…”
he shrugged, “that’s just life around here, i’ll be okay.”
she gasped out something that could have been a laugh if she wasn’t so devastated, “it shouldn’t have to be! you don’t deserve any of this mess… just because i broke up with him doesn’t make it your problem!”
he lifted his head and looked up at her, “look at me, babydoll.”
she blinked out a couple of tears, but didn’t dare look down at him. he reached up and gently grabbed her cheek, slowly turning her head to look him in the eyes.
“i’m okay.”
he pushed himself up gingerly and pressed a sweet kiss to her lips. she huffed, a few more tears sliding down her cheeks, and he stuck his tongue out playfully.
she let a smile break through, giggling softly and kissing him again, “can i get you anything, honey? some frozen peas? do you want to shower?”
two-bit shrugged, “i’m just a little cut up, baby, just some stuff that won’t feel too good in the morning.”
marcia mulled it over for a moment, running the towel over his wet hair while she thought.
finally, she perked up, “how about i run you a hot bath and throw these clothes in the wash? my parents will be gone until tuesday, you can stay here tonight.”
he smiled up at her and nodded.
“okay,” she blushed, pushing herself off the stairs and hurrying up to start running a bath for him.
she let the water run and warm up for a few minutes before she shutting the drain, pouring in some sweet smelling bubble bath, and turning back around to dry her hands off. two-bit was watching her fondly, leaning against the doorway.
marcia blushed under his gaze, “c’mon, you’re gonna get sick if you stay in those wet clothes.”
she ushered him back to her bedroom, grabbing another towel from the bathroom and following him back to her bedroom. he started to strip off his overalls as she began to sift through one of her dresser drawers, producing a t-shirt and flannel pants that he’d left there ages ago.
she giggled as she tossed them onto the bed, “you may as well have your own drawer now.”
“your dad would probably have a heart attack,” two-bit laughed, slowly pulling off his shirt, careful not to hit any of the cuts on his face.
he finished taking off the rest of his clothes and tied the towel around his waist, heading over to the bathroom.
“go ahead and get started, i’ll be right there,” she waved to him as he looked back curiously.
marcia leaned up against the dresser for a minute and took a couple of steadying breaths before she started to pull off her dress and cardigan and threw them into the laundry basket. she reached for a set of pajamas from the open drawer, but thought better of getting them wet and instead pulled off the rest of her clothes and grabbed the bathrobe hanging by her door.
when she pushed the bathroom door open, two-bit was up to his neck in the hot water and bubbles, his eyes closed and his head leaned back against the ceramic lip of the tub. she pulled the step stool in the corner over to sit by his head. she brushed back some of his hair and he opened his eyes, or at least as much as he could from how swollen one of them was.
“you okay?” she asked him gently, her thumb running over a small cut next to his eye. he nodded slowly, and she bit the inside of her cheek for a moment, “can i start cleaning these up? i don’t want anything to get infected.”
“you sure the bath won’t clean ‘em up alright for me?” he smiled, but marcia still stood up and grabbed the first aid kit from the medicine cabinet.
“did soda make it back to cherry’s? and chet? ah-” he winced as she started to clean his split lip with a piece of gauze.
“i think so,” she grabbed some more antiseptic and sprayed down the gauze as she folded it. “chet got there first… told me he saw you on your way over here.”
“but what about soda?” he asked again.
marcia sighed, “he’s okay, i didn’t see him, but he was right behind chet.”
“you don’t know, then,” two-bit readjusted in the bath, as if he was about to march over to cherry’s then and there.
“yes, i do,” marcia smiled, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder and guiding him back down. “if something was wrong, cherry would have called. he’s fine, baby.”
he sunk back down, low enough to where he could blow bubbles in the water, and marcia giggled loudly. he pushed himself up and smiled knowingly over at her.
she realized what he wanted and her eyebrows shot up, “no, you’re all banged up, i don’t want to hurt you, and now is not the time for that.”
he gave her another goofy smile, “we don’t have to do that, is it so bad that i wanna hold you?”
marcia sighed heavily and he smirked, “you don’t have anything on under that robe, baby.”
she knew he was going to win, she wasn’t upset about it, just that he was right. she was trying hard not to smile, but she could tell it wasn’t working.
“c’mere,” he held out a hand and she rolled her eyes, slowly untying the robe and letting it fall to the ground. he gave her a small giggle as she stepped into the water and sat down opposite him.
he playfully splashed her, and she gasped, “two! i don’t wanna get my hair wet!”
two-bit rolled his eyes and grabbed at her ankles, pulling her down. her hands slipped out from under her and she fell in up to her eyes in the bubbles. she popped back up quickly, her mouth hanging open in an incredulous smile.
“oh, you absolute menace,” she pushed herself up and fell forward so that their chests were flush together.
he pressed a quick kiss to her lips, barely concealing his look of glee, “you love me.”
“aren’t you lucky…” she laid her head down against his shoulder, pressing a kiss to his collarbone.
they lay together, two-bit turning on the tap to let the warm water run whenever the water started to cool down. two-bit traced patterns on marcia’s back and over her sides, occasionally jabbing at tender spots and earning soft giggles.
eventually, she sat up, tapping his shoulder gently, “c’mon, let me wash that hair of yours.”
two-bit sat up slightly and tilted his head back to get the rest of his hair wet as she poured out some of her shampoo into her hands.
“so… did you win?” she asked gingerly as she started massaging the shampoo through his curls.
“hm?” he hummed, glancing up at her.
“the rumble,” she amended. “did you guys win?”
two-bit shrugged, some suds falling from his head and onto his shoulders, “i don’t think anyone wins at a rumble anymore, babydoll.”
marcia hummed, gently tipping his head back with her index finger to give him the go-ahead to rinse out the shampoo. when he popped back up, she had conditioner at the ready and began giving him the same treatment.
“unless you wanted to know if i kicked ass,” he grinned goofily around her hands. “in which case, of course i did.”
she laughed, pressing a quick kiss to his lips and resting their foreheads together.
he fiddled with the ends of her hair, which were finally drying, “can’t i wash your hair, too, pretty girl?”
she smoothed his hair back and kissed his forehead sweetly, “today’s not wash day, check back in on sunday and we’ll talk. i think it’s time we get you in bed, sweetheart, you’re exhausted.”
he chuckled lightly, “molly’s gonna kill me for not comin’ home…”
“you can call her,” marcia reassured him. “now rinse out that conditioner, i want to go to bed.“
he dipped his head back and she carded her fingers through his hair, making sure all of the product was rinsed before guiding him back up and pulling the stopper out of the tub. marcia stood up and grabbed a towel, drying off as much as she could before wrapping it around herself and stepping out of the tub. she grabbed another towel and turned around to hand it to two-bit as he slowly pushed himself to his feet, the soreness from the fight still deep in his bones.
she ushered him back to her bedroom, closing the door behind them even though she knew they would be alone. she slipped on a fresh set of pajamas as two-bit pulled on the clothes they had set out on the dresser. marcia fell into bed with two-bit ready to follow suit, her collection of blankets and pillows like a balm after the commotion of the rumble, and all that came after it.
“you should call molly,” she sat up, half blocking his side of the bed with her arm. “she’s not gonna sleep until she knows you’re alright. just tell her you’re here and that you’re okay.”
two-bit rolled his eyes but didn’t wait for her to tell him again to hurry down the hallway to where he knew the phone was. he called back to her, “i’m gonna grab those frozen peas from the freezer!”
“okay!” marcia peeled back the covers on his side of the bed and fluffed up the pillows while he was gone, snuggling down into her own blankets.
two-bit popped back into the room a few minutes later, his smile firmly back in place and the bag of peas from marcia’s freezer pressed against his shoulder.
“you talk to her?” she asked gently as he crawled in next to her.
he nodded, readjusting the bag as he laid down, “yeah, she’s at soda’s with darry and pony, mama’s gonna pick her up in the morning.”
marcia nodded, scooting closer under the covers. he looked over at her, silently asking permission, before plastering himself to her side. she could tell he was hitting a brick wall of exhaustion now that he’d burned through the adrenaline high.
she brushed some of his damp curls back, twisting one around her finger, “can i get you anything? water, aspirin?”
he shook his head, his cheek pressed against her collarbone, “mmm, no, i just wanna sleep.”
she smiled and kissed his head sweetly, “i think we can do that.”
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alkelkha · 14 hours ago
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𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐄𝐓. chapter four
relationship — jinx/powder x fem!blk coded reader
contents&warnings! : wc: 4.0k | post season 2 | lower-case indented | angst | heart to heart | just kiss already 🗣️ | non-sexual intimacy | fluff | mentions of them sharing the same bed | mentions of isha | these losers can't stay serious | yes reader has plot and yes i'm going through with it | not beta read | yes i am making this up along i go | author's note: i'm finally back after a month... don't come after me though! i'm literally in the middle of moving to a whole different state (not my choice).
❛❛ APOLOGIZE WITH FIREWORKS ❜❜
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a careless toss of an envelope with this week’s paycheck slid off the desk. your eyes followed the movement. “you’re slacking, [name].” 
you’ve been slacking for the past two weeks. that’s how long it’s been since you and blue fought. you thought that she would come around and the two of you would hang out again like nothing happened, but of course, it didn’t. you were given straight radio silence, you even tried visiting her at her workshop and home. nothing.
she was your best friend and you hurt her to the point she’s shut herself in. was she even in there? was she ignoring you? did she run off? did she hate you now? did you just ruin everything? you couldn’t tell, it was like she locked herself in. this was killing you. 
every since she left it was like all the good things she brought with her did too. the endless laughter between the two of you, the satuation of the world. because of her you finally felt safe, your loan sharks finally stopped bothering you.
sometimes you think you see her (which you don’t). anything blue made you think of her, clouds too. you can’t bring yourself to eat the blue raspberry candy. 
the truth was that she was your good luck charm.
“do you want to lose this job?” big don’s voice rang in the office, snapping you back to reality. lose this job? this was the only job that could help pay off your debt that didn’t involve selling yourself, beating others half to death, and stealing. 
“i’ve been kind to you. i gave you this pussy job so you could pay me back with my own money.” he leans forward resting his clasped-together hands on the desk.
“but i see something,” the tall man raises from his seat. your breath got caught up in your throat and your heart quickened its pace. “…someone has made you sloppy. has taken your attention off of what is really important.” you knew what he meant and you couldn’t deny it. 
you have gotten sloppy with your work, clocking out a little bit early, and coming to work late more often— that was you when you and jinx started hanging out, but since jinx and you have gotten into that fight all of it got worse. “that new girl…” your eyes shot from the ground and straight to big don. the way he referred to her made your stomach turn. was he going to send his goons after her too.
“don’t—“ without thinking you stepped forward, you were about to walk up and slap him. good thing your mind caught up with you. yay, no bullet between your eyes!
“don’t what?” big don shot back at you, he stopped pacing and walked over to you. “run her out of flosnum? tie up the new girl in town? have some of my men give her a good beating? or maybe i’ll make you do that…” gulping at his implication you step back. you knew big don was sick, but surely not that sick?
right?
towering over you, two heads taller his dull dark eyes look down at you, his eyes make you feel so insignificant. you were nothing but a mere worker bee, “[insert sibling] may have escaped off to bilgewater. ixtal? ionia? who gives a fuck anymore. what matters is that one of you is here. one thing stands. your father’s debt.”
“get your act together or you’re on your own.” he then grips your hair, and with a harsh tug he pulls you closer to him. he smelt of cigarettes and mangos, “once you’re on your own i won’t care how and what you do to pay off the debt. sell your body for all i care.”
you left his office and went back to working at the bar. overtime. work for two weeks with no pay as punishment, which was mercy considering you've been waterboarded other times.
though you were starting to consider being waterboarded instead.
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how long has it been? she can’t remember, there was no point in counting hours or days when she was in this state. 
her chipped painted nails scratched off her cuticles to the point they bleed. curled up in the middle of her room stuck in an unforgiving daze. a haze that consumed her mind and filled it with thoughts that pricked her brain as if they were needles.
she fucked up. again. and she doesn’t have the guts to try and fix it.
not that there was anything to fix, you were done with her. you hated her. you saw her as insane as soon as you saw her.
she was an idiot to show you that side of her. what made her think that this would be any different? danger or not, flosnum was not immune to her effect. 
her blue chopped hair now grown inches past her ears but not long enough to touch her shoulders, her bangs terribly long, and the purple dye worn out. the bonsai tree on her bedroom windowsill half dead. the irrigating bear under her bed where its voice is too far to catch. 
jinx. that’s who she was. she couldn’t fight it anymore. running from it has been deemed impossible even when she’s a sea away from piltover and zaun. 
metal and wood clanking against each other.
she could hear it, the small huffs, exhales, and sniffles. the light-weight pitter-patter danced around her.
isha.
jinx was greatness to isha. a haven. a symbol. someone worth protecting.
jinx could feel the vibrations from the floor bouncing back to her curled-up position. she had her knees to her chest and hid her face.
she couldn’t bring herself to look up. she was scared that if she looked up she would see her. if she did, she wouldn’t know what to do.
all those times she told off sevika that jinx was dead, isha was the one that kept the image of her alive. not a symbol of destruction— no longer just a loose cannon but a hero. 
powder was the one that died.
she thought that maybe if she could start over, it would all be from the beginning.
no jinx. just powder. the more she stayed on this tropical island she was reminded that she couldn’t be powder. 
to be honest, jinx liked isha’s version of jinx. the version that isha would play games, watch battles fight each other, fall asleep to her overly-dramatized exploits, graffiti on walls, and stargaze with. 
the careless dancing footsteps morphed into cautious ones and the steps were slightly heavier. 
step. step. step.
these footsteps didn’t seem as if they were sneaking up on prey, still, jinx refused to raise her head up from her knees, her eyes stayed shut. 
just ignore it.
she repeated those words, a mantra that got her through a handful of her episodes. unexpectantly, light fingertips grazed her shoulder, unsure if they could go further in the contact. 
hallucinations couldn’t touch her.
a low gentle voice “blue.” jinx felt all of her defenses fall. how pathetic that’s all it took.
you crouched down behind her. jinx’s back faced you, wearing only a pink tank top and wool shorts that showed off the blue clouds on the right side of her body.
the only reason you were able to get in was because you found a foolishly placed spare key sticking out from under a ceramic pot with a wilting flower.
you were tired of waiting.
“i’m sorry.” trying to shove down the heat rising to your face, you swallow. there was nothing more you hated than apologizing, which was ironic since you did it quite often. normally when you did it, it was out of fear or common courtesy.
sincerely apologizing on the other hand? the thought of you being the person in the wrong felt like a punch in the gut, but none of that mattered. 
the only thing you wanted right now was your friend back. “i’m so sorry. that day at the beach when i sighed it wasn’t towards you.” jinx was still. “that day was perfect and i ruined it. i made you feel that i didn’t enjoy it. i did! it’s just—“ you sucked in a breath before explaining.
“…i have a hard time living in the moment, i’m always thinking about my next shift. that i have my shift in this many hours, i’ll have to deal with rowdy customers in less than a day after, i have to pay off my debt.” she didn’t answer, it felt like you were talking to a brick wall.
“ever since you came into my life you have been what i look forward to.”
silence is all she gives you. not even a hum of acknowledgment. “blu—“ you couldn’t finish the nickname because of how shocked you were to see jinx finally turn her head towards you. you can only see her side profile due to the position the two of you are holding. 
the saturation of her vibrant red-violet eyes is now exhausted and dull. an alarm rang in your head. scrabbling from your knees you made it to in front of her to get the whole view of her. you needed to see all of her.
jinx’s closed-off position, her days-old makeup, unkempt hair, and lightweight. her head a bit more raised so she could look at you better as your eyes roamed around her body. 
her eyes.
her eyes were so doe and dull, the manic that she usually held in her eyes was nowhere to be found. this was the most vulnerable you’ve seen her yet there were still so many walls. 
she looked horrible.
you did this.
“[name]…”
her hoarse voice made your heart ache. gulping, pushing down the guilt. you slowly and carefully take her hands into yours. “let’s get you cleaned up, blue.”
the first thing you did was take off her makeup with a wet piece of cloth. you had no idea how long she had been like this, it looks like she had that same face of makeup for almost a week, probably more.
her cheeks were tear-stricken with dried-up mascara and eyeliner. her purple eyeshadow was worn out along with her smudged lipstick.
you washed her hair in the sink. she sat on a chair, her head leaned back as the faucet ran through her blue locks. your hands gently messaging her scalp, and then detangled everything with a brush.
the two of you didn’t talk at all. sitting on a stool your wrist moved in circular motions, washing her back.
she felt herself slowly come back to reality. the way you were being so careful with her as if she was worth being gentle to. were you doing all of this just to torment her?
surely you weren’t faking the affection in your touch? you wouldn’t do such a thing. you couldn’t. 
she felt her eyes burning up.
she felt the rough texture of the cloth exfoliating her skin, your hand carefully leading its way to her tattooed arm. your movements slow not wanting to have her pull away from your touch.
jinx lets out a ragged breath, louder than the scrubbing of her skin and water droplets. that was the first breath she let out since you came to her. your movement paused and went even slower. gentler. 
that’s when she bursts into tears. 
you froze up a bit hearing her choked sobs, “oh hon…” jinx’s shoulder shook as she leaned forward, away from you. her sobs only got louder and louder. saliva collected in her mouth and her face turned a pinkish hue.
putting aside the cloth you took her shoulders and pulled her back towards you, you wrapped your arms around her neck, and your head was right next to hers. “tell me what’s wrong.” you whispered in her ear, you didn’t bother hiding the tremor in your voice.
“please, talk to me. did i make you upset again?” you plead for her to talk to you.
“i’m sorry.” her sobs so broken that her voice cracks as she apologizes. “i’m sorry. i’m sorry.” she just shakes her head repeating herself over and over again.
“shh.” you say rocking the both of you side to side in an attempt to lull her sobs. “it’s okay, there’s nothing you need to apologize for. we both messed up.”
“i’m such a child, i ruined everything!” she hiccups, her sobs only worsened. she leans on you like a child seeking comfort.
“stop that. you ruined nothing, okay?” you tried to keep your voice firm.
“i made something out of nothing again and i pushed you away and now you hate me—”
you cut her off, “if i hated you would i be here right now?” 
“you will once i mess up again.”
sighing, you pinch her cheek. “it was a silly little fight, we got through it.”
jinx winces at the pinch but she doesn’t pull away instead, her cries lessen and her face scrunches up a bit. “what if we get into another fight?”
not letting go of her cheek you kept speaking, “we’ll get through it. even when i get irritated or mad with you, i’ll always come back to you.” she turns her head and you pull away to give her some space to move.
her eyes were bloodshot, her pink irises sparkled as if she was begging you to confirm your words. “you’re my best friend, things like this will always pass over, i promise.” 
jinx’s sobs were no more and what was left was her small sniffles as you got back to bathing her.
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getting back together with you made jinx realize some things.
number one: you would never ever ever ever leave her no matter what! 
this meant she could do anything without you leaving her. like sleeping together in the same bed and kicking you off.
number two: the two of you were practically made for each other!
she has been clinging onto every second of the day and you welcomed it with open arms. (well other than the times she’s stalking you, but you don’t need to know that!) has she gotten more childish with you? maybe.
it was your day off so per usual you were with her, instead of rotting together at her workshop the two of you went out for ice cream and window shopped. the two of you walked side by side in the blazing heat, jinx’s arm hooked on yours. 
usually, she would complain and complain in this weather and end up with sunburns which you had to tend to. these days she wouldn’t, it was like she grew up with flosnum. she wore a mismatched bikini top and stockings, low rise shorts black and pink shorts, and black boots with pink laces. “new style?” you raised a brow.
“just matching the weather.” jinx licks the dripping cotton candy ice cream from her cone. the undercity wasn’t hot like flosnum. it was humid at best but mostly cold. hell, she felt the warmth of sun on her skin more on her first week here than she did her whole life in zaun.
going on your route you spot a jewelry vendor, something catches your eye. mindlessly pulling away from her to go check it out jinx furrows her brows, she follows behind you. your eyes were on the turtle trinket. the jewels on it sparkled like no other.
stupid.
jinx’s finger hooks on the loop of your bottoms and pulls you closer to her side. she bends over a bit to get a better look at the stupid trinket. “oh come on, toots, you don’t need this. you already have that ugly turtle pendant.”
you smack the back of her head and she whines. “my necklace is not stupid!” you defend the bronze hanging around your neck. “besides, i wasn’t going to buy it….” your eyes trail to the price tag, the sight causes you to frown. “way too expensive anyway.” you turn on your heels and walk away from the vendor. 
she watches you walk away and back to the turtle trinket. it was ugly. tacky too. you wouldn’t look good in it.
jinx shrugs and catches up with you, she loops her arm with yours licking her ice cream once again with a stolen trinket in her pocket.
number three: she missed chaos.
because of that, she’s going to blow up at tonight’s festival. she’s been working on it the day after you bathed her, tucked her into bed, and fell asleep in bed with her. which was six days ago.
don’t worry. don’t worry. she’s not going to kill anyone. she was done with that, instead, these bombs were going to make a teenie tiny little mess.
today’s festival was in honor of the day flosnum successfully defended itself against bilgewater, many lives were lost due to the battle. which was an incredible feat now that jinx thinks about it.
anyways, that doesn’t matter! what matters is that she wants to ruin it. 
it’s the most jinx thing she can do.
somehow the paradise was infinitely more vibrant under the dark sky. maybe it was the twinkling stars, the glowing plants, and the fairy lights. everyone gathered in the streets, adorned in tropical garlands. the two of you held a stick, the tip burned bright, sparkling. 
normally, jinx’s mind would be on how gorgeous your smile was, but today she was too excited to even think properly. she was too happy to fuck the celebration up. she had already planted the bombs. 
the air was filled with a sweet and fruity scent of exotic flowers. your sweet laughter echoed in her mind finally snapping her out of it. “what’s got you so happy, blue?” she asked, pointing out her dumb smile.
jinx dropped the stick, “follow me.” she grabbed onto you forcing you to do the same and follow behind her. 
there was so much of everything. people, noise, lights, smells. you canvas through the streets and she takes you onto her workshop’s rooftop. though her workshop was placed in a shady alleyway, the view she had up top was breathtaking.
her rooftop was decorated with random cut-up fabrics, unfinished projects (aka junk but she won’t let you call it that), and colorful lanterns. the stars painted the night sky, the jinx sat on the rooftop ledge. being the more cautious one you tried not to, but she forced you anyway.
“we’re best friends, right?” jinx slowly turns her head to you, your eyes are on the ground, watching the people below. 
“i sure hope so,” you snort. realizing that it wasn’t the right time to joke you backtracked, “of course we are, the best of friends.” you didn’t look back but that didn’t make your response any less sincere.
her red-violet eyes trace your side profile. you were pretty like this, with the colors of the lanterns illuminating off of you. the color blue graced your brown skin and the coils of your hair. it was almost as beautiful as when the sunlight would kiss your skin.
jinx wasn’t sure when it started. “it” being when she became so attentive to you. maybe, it was the day she first saw you behind the counter of her now workshop. maybe, it was the day she crashlanded and you saved her.
the topic of the day she crashlanded was never brought up between the two of you. jinx wasn’t sure if you were aware that she knew.
jinx should’ve forgotten about you that day, her vision was hazy and smoke filled her lungs— her mind shouldn’t even have registered the details of you. but she did.
the key detail she remembered?
it was that stupid bronze necklace.
the ugly piece of metal that is still hanging around your neck. it looks as if it was handmade. well maintained yet specks of chipped-off green paint on the turtle’s shell.
“good,” jinx smiles at your answer. her hand reaches into her pocket and your eyes follow, her fist closed around not letting you know what it is just yet. “because i wanted to give you something.”
your eyes finally lock with hers. “i’m not good with words. i’m not good with my actions either.” her vibrant eyes shift away from yours, but she forces herself to keep eye contact with yours. “i fuck shit up. always. as soon as something good comes in my life it’s taken away, by my hand or something else.”
jinx couldn't find the right words, she didn't even know where she was going with this. “i ruin everything,” she laughed bitterly, her eyes searched yours to see if you were annoyed by your senseless rambling, but you didn’t. you listened, waiting for the next words to come out of her mouth.
“i’m jinxed. it’s in my name.”
jinx looks down at her hand, her fist is holding onto the mystery item tightly. then her fingers hesitantly open up her fist, revealing what’s in the palm of your hand. you look down. this feeling in your stomach, it flips and flutters. “blue, is this—“
“jinx,” she didn’t let you get a sentence in. “that’s my name.”
jinx...so that was blue's name. oddly enough, it fit her perfectly. she didn't look like a sasha, cassie, hannah, or kate. for someone as cool as her she should have an equally cool name.
“that’s so cool!” your eyes twinkle, filled with excitement, completely ignorant to the significance of this moment.
when the words left your mouth jinx left hundreds of degrees hotter. a warmth blazed through her body. no one has ever had this type of reaction to her name.
“so, you’ve been cool you’re whole life, huh?” you scrunch up your face in mock jealousy. “cool hair. cool talents. cool personality. cool name. you’re just a package, aren’t you, jinx?”
why did she like her name coming from your lips so much?
trying to hide her flustered state she puts on a cocky front, “enough of how cool you think i am. are you going to take my gift or not?” she dangles the trinket in front of your face. “you stole it.” you blink at her unamused. still you took it from her hand. “says who? you think i can’t afford something like this?” she tilts her head, raising a brow. 
“then what’s this?” you point to the tag. 
she looks at it and grumbles. after pulling it off she then put on a faux innocent smile. “what’s what?” seeing how your unamused expression didn’t waver she sighed in defeat. “i just wanted to do something for you, you deserve tiny luxuries like this. maybe it could bring you some luck too. a lucky charm.”
her words managed to make you loosen up. your face softens. “thanks, hon, but i already have a lucky charm.”
jinx’s squints her eyes at you, “wait, you do?”
"i'm talking about you, jinx."
jinx, a lucky charm? how ironic. se had always been the cause of trouble, never the solution. when she did try to find one it only made everything worse. but here the two of you are. you hailed her as your lucky charm. a good omen.
she lets out a bark of laughter, she laughs with her full chest. all of this was too surreal it was making her head spin. 
POW POW POW
with distant bangs a cloud of red, then purple, then green, then blue. the town square exploded with a flurry of colorful dust. the dust danced in the sky and fell back down onto the cobbled ground as if it were snowfall.
oh right. jinx forgot about those.
the two of you whip your heads to the noise to see the mayhem going on. 
their faces being painted with the colorful dye. the locals dance and twirl along with the ongoing blasts of the bright vibrant powder into the air. children rushed trying to catch the falling powder, some even making angles on the ground.
your eyes snap wide with amazement at the view, “oh my gods!” no way in hell were you going to miss out on something like this. you carefully get off the rooftop ledge and pull jinx with you. 
“get your ass up, let’s join the fun!”
screams, panicked voices, and people trying to take cover, that’s what jinx expected. not the sound of flosnum residents’ laughter and cheers. her plans to cause chaos failed.
she really was a jinx.
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TAGLIST: @millie2point0 @powderbomb-jinxed @velvetinkbym
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grichel · 1 year ago
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ok officially need advice on this. my mom is a super nice woman i’ve never in my life had an argument with, but she will not stop buying me dresses online that i don’t want. we are going on a big family vacation on a fancy cruise ship in december, and for some reason either she or my stepdad has gotten it in their heads that i either can’t afford to dress myself properly or i can’t be trusted to dress myself properly. she’s sent me now like four or five boxes of clothes and each one has like five or six dresses in it, it’s getting ridiculous. she doesn’t know that i’m nb, but i did mention the last time i saw her that i’m not interested in dresses currently and i mentioned wanting to get a tux or a suit for the vacation, which was taken well at the time but completely forgotten or ignored later. additionally, now that my job has changed, i have less time to go out during the work day, and every time she sends me a box, i have to return all the stuff that i don’t want and it’s a huge hassle, like this current box i have to take it to the post office on saturday because i won’t be able to do it any other day before the date it’s due back, which means i have to try them all on now, so i can print the return slip tomorrow, so i can get them all in the box and ready saturday morning. it’s just annoying and unwanted. i don’t know how to ask her to stop, i thought the previous box she sent was the final one but i just received another this week and i’m getting really frustrated with her. but i’m worried she’ll take it personally or that it will make her sad if i say anything about it. i don’t want to upset her but i don’t want her to be wasting her money and me to be wasting my time etc
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bilestat · 7 months ago
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insane how quickly something small can tank my mood
#i am so tired of being cut off when i’m talking#esp when someone doesn’t even care enough to realize i was over halfway through a sentence#and doesn’t ask what i was saying#or when they just make it incredibly obvious they weren’t paying attention or outright don’t care what i’m talking about#even when i’m talking super excitedly#it makes me feel so fucking small and unimportant#like yeah i guess the shit i say doesn’t matter 99% of the time but it matters to ME#but it hurts so bad when i get cut off only for someone else to say stuff entirely unrelated#and to then just like. stream of consciousness ramble every thought that enters their head#like okay. cool. awesome. alright#my mom does that all the time i’ll be telling her something and then i’ll get cut off or she’ll wait til i’m done#to out of nowhere start telling me super in depth life histories of people she hasn’t seen since she was a child. or people i don’t know.#and it’ll always be so in depth about so many people idk OR so fucking vague i get confused as hell#in the typical boomer just needs to talk at someone or hear their own voice way (sorry ily mom)#and i know i can go on for ages about fandom shit that confuses her or she doesn’t know about but#idk. i do not have much else in my life right now. and i only have her and my sibling and very very few friends that aren’t online#and even irl friends i only see a couple times a year each if i’m lucky#i just hate my life lol and i need to stop before i spiral#i have already gone on long enough and will be embarrassed when i come back to delete this because honestly who gives a shit#i need to get over myself#to be deleted#personal
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itspileofgoodthings · 11 months ago
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kavehayati · 2 months ago
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I’ve been teaching my sister how to play Genshin for some of the past hours today and I hope she quits bc now I feel really guilty about it I don’t want her to waste all her time on it and Im thinking abt why she even wanted to start the game and now I feel even more horrible bc of some reasons that I kinda feel guilty explaining
#dora daily#idk how to tell her maybe she should focus on other things and games#I don’t know I’m overthinking bc everything rn is such a mess and my heart hurt so bad earlier and I felt like throwing up and stuff idk#what to do#everything is somehow going worse and worse it feels like it’s snowballing out of control but it’s because why is everyone so mean to me#like all I have ever wanted is just to be seen but I’m always invisible to everyone and people OFTEN tell me they forget abt me so many#times that it’s more often they forget me than remember#why am I so forgettable and why do I get replaced like idk what’s wrong with me#what’s so horrible abt my personality I don’t understand like is it the way I think ? I think it’s the way I think#but I can’t change how my brain is wired or how it functions I just don’t know how to fix it#I swear I’ve tried everything for years and years I’ve spent since my very early years trying to find out what’s wrong with me and why#it’s so hard for ppl to like me I’ve tried to change everything it doesn’t work and only six months ago I found out why people don’t like me#just by trial and error#it’s my brain and the way I think it’s just all wrong idk how I’m meant to think but it’s not meant to be like this#my personality is all wrong my likes are all wrong my thinking and everything is all wrong and I’m stuck like this unless I somehow do#some surgery on my brain to fix how I think I’ll be like this forever#I wish I could just fold myself up into a little version of myself and just put it away to take up the least amount of space in this world#I’ll never belong in this world and I don’t want to be here anymore#shoot I can barely even see the text on my keyboard bc I just can’t stop crying#I always said my parents should’ve never gotten married they were never a match my mum should’ve gotten an abortion when she found out like#she never even liked my dad anyways#fuck how do I stop crying my mum is gonna be here soon and she’s gonna start laughing at me like she usually does when I tear up I’m#straight up bawling LOL imagine she sees that I’ll be made a mockery more than I already am this is so humiliating and pathetic. why do I#care sm now I’ve never wanted to be alive but now I’m so sad because I really don’t want to be here anymore but I don’t know what to do#my head hurts now maybe I should go to sleep maybe it’ll help me forget about this at least for a while longer#I’m just so sad I have to manually ask ppl to care about me I’m so tired I have to do this with everyone#I’m not even angry anymore I’m just so sad I’m sad that others get that care like it’s second nature but with me I have to ask and beg forit#oh ik if my mum sees I’ll just tell her I’ve been itching my eyes if she asks why they’re red LOL#It’s okay if nobodyll ever like me like I like them right ? I don’t have to get liked back as long as I give love to others right ? then I#won’t be useless like my mum says I am at least I can have a tiny bit of use even though my love means absolutely nothing I bet it’s okay iv
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hayleykiyopioids · 9 months ago
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I don’t know what the hell imma put in the tags tonight I’m drunk, was hanging out with my roommate but now I’m scrolling tumblr and also a little sad/mad that the girl I’m (was) talking to cancelled our plans tonight for like the 4th time so I think I need to stop talking to her before I get my feelings hurt
My feelings are already hurt but like I’m gay and she’s cute as hell and keeps canceling on me so idk what the hell else am I supposed to do
She’s cute as fuck and I think she’s so cool and interesting but I also don’t have time for someone always canceling plans!!! Anyway idk ignore me tonight bc I’m drunk and a lil sad and I need to finish my drink before I go to bed tonight
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robinsgrl · 1 month ago
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toxic baby daddy rafe does something to me. no soft rafe (only with his girls and only sometimes). he’s abrasive and harsh. even more when someone messes with you. yooo where my panties at
mdni 18+
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It’s been three months. Three months without Rafe as your boyfriend. Three months of his only title in your life being your baby daddy. There were days where you would refuse to even call him that.
In high school, you loved the sound of his voice. You loved how the palm of his hand felt at the small of your back. You loved that being around him brought you a sense of peace.
Now, all you two do is argue. About everything and anything. Even if you do start half of them. Not now, though.
“What I do in my spare time is none of your business!” Luckily, Samara’s in the living room, her noise cancelling headphones on as she watches some YouTube show, giggling when something funny comes up. You’d usually try and pay attention to her screen time but you can’t when Rafe is in your home and bitching at you.
“So you’re whoring it up when Samara’s with me?” His words are harsh, spitting them at you.
Your eyes are wide and bewildered as you look up at him, chest rising and falling from the intense match you’re having. “Listen to yourself! Whoring it up? Are you from the fifties? Women can have sex without being called a whore nowadays!”
“So you are fucking someone? Who is he.” It’s not a question. It’s a goddamn demand and you hate the way it makes your knees feel weak.
You scoff loudly, rolling your eyes. “I’m not fucking anyone.”
“Don’t fucking lie to me, ___, Topper fucking saw you.”
“Topper’s your dick rider.” You spit back out. It comes without warning. His big hand falls on your neck, tightening around you. Your back pushes up against the wall, eyes wide and up on his as he stares down at you angrily.
His face nears yours, lips ghosting over the shell of your ear. A shudder runs through your body and you want to shut your legs to help ease the sensation between them but he forces his knee to you. “I’ll kill any man who gets near you, do you fucking hear me?” His words are low and menacing. From anyone else, it’d be scary. It’d drive you away and straight to goddamn police station. But from him? You can’t deny how good it feels.
Rafe’s always been protective of you. Since you two met, he’s hovered around you like a scary dog, growling at anyone who came your way. It grew when you got knocked up in your senior year of high school. And it grew tenfold when your baby girl was born. But it got to be suffocating. You broke it off with him and it took him two weeks to realize you were being serious.
You would never admit that you made a mistake. Not ever. Admitting that you miss him only lets him win. It gives him a point. And yes, you should be mature enough to realize this isn’t a game but he’s so damn cocky about it. The last thing you need from Rafe is a bigger ego.
“Who is he?”
“Eric. Eric Jones.” You admit easily, breath shaky and full of a need for him.
“Did he fuck you?”
You can’t answer. He repeats himself.
“Did he fuck you?”
You nod, hands falling to his arm as his hand tightens on your neck. His eyes won’t leave your face, taking you in completely. You can see it all. The anger. The jealousy. The twinge of hurt. He pulls his hand from your neck and pulls away from you. “Call your mother. Tell her to pick Samara up.”
“What?”
“Just fucking do it.” And you do. Like always, you do as told and Samara’s off with her grandma for the night.
“He can’t fuck you like I can.” You’re a drooling mess as he pounds into you from behind, the sound of skin on skin meeting fills the room. His hand is in your hair, forcing your head back. “Tell me. Tell me how good I make you feel.”
The moans and whimpers coming from you won’t stop. You try to form words as he keeps shattering your world but it won’t come out. “Fucking slut. Answer me.” His hands trail down to your neck, pushing you up slightly to sit as he keeps fucking into you. Your back arches up against him, toes curling as you feel the building ache in the bottom of your belly.
He groans loudly as he feels your walls clench down on him as you curse out loud, grinding down on him to reach that peak you want so badly.
“Fuck, baby, you’re so fucking tight. He couldn’t even fuck you right, could he? My poor girl, getting fucked by amateurs.” His fingers trail down to your freed tits, pinching at your pebbled nipples. “I don’t care what break you think we’re on, when you need a good fucking, come to me. No one can ever make you this cock drunk.”
You’re nodding frantically, “yes, yes, fuck, Rafe! Rafe! Oh, fuck!” You come undone when his fingers find their way to your clit, rubbing at your sensitive and pulsing bundle of nerves.
At this very moment, you’re grateful for the house that Rafe bought you instead of cooping up in the one bedroom apartment you wanted when you moved out of his place. You had hated the power he had for giving you such a nice place but you’re grateful now as you moan and yell his name, body convulsing as his fingers keep working against you.
“Raaaafe, fuck!” He’s pushing deep and deeper as he pushes your front side back onto the bed. The overstimulation is making you writhe beneath him, pretty whimpers leaving your swollen and reddened lips. You can tell he’s reaching his own end when his thrusts become harder and longer, momentum slowing.
One pump. Two pumps. Three. Four. And he’s groaning in your ear, his front pressed up against your back as he comes inside of you from behind, your cunt fluttering around him at the full feeling of his load.
You awaken hours later to the bed dipping beside you. You had fallen asleep in Rafe’s arms after he had cleaned you up and whispered soothing and sweet nothings into your ear.
“Rafe?” You sit up tiredly, rubbing at your eyes to wipe the sleep away. His back is turned to you, the most relaxed you’d seen him in a while.
You scooch closer to him, pinched eyes trying to take a look at him. A small gasp leaves you as you see his bloodied and scarred hands. “Go back to sleep, baby.” His polo is covered in dribbles of blood, some drops of it drying up on his face.
You want to ask questions. You want to clean him up. But you can’t. You’re not a very good liar and the last time the police came around asking for your help, you almost broke, but Rafe was always thinking of you, his lawyer cleaning up the mess you made with the police. He had kissed and soothed you down from your teary apologies that night for being weak.
You nod, yawning softly, “okay… just… put the shirt in the wash.” It’s his turn to nod, a soft smile on his face as he presses a kiss to the top of your head.
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inkedells · 5 months ago
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pairing: old!logan x f!reader
Logan is sick and tired of you treating him like he's fragile. He'll ignore his relentless pain to show you what it's like to be taken apart, rough and slow, then fast and agonizing.
wc: 3.5k of pure smut
warnings: heavy smut, lap sitting, fingering, oral (f!receiving and m!receiving), dirty talk, facials, p in v, ruined orgasms, snowballing, kind of angsty, the claws come out, logan is angry with you, kinda toxic, definitely mean, but still kind of sweet, pwp basically, blood, but it's not bloodplay, it's just logan not caring if he's hurt, if i missed any let me know.
Logan comes home and throws himself back on that torn-up leather sofa, thumb flicking his lighter while the other holds a cigar. It’s less of a distraction from the ache in his bones, and more of a device to push you away. Because if you think he’s tired or angry or hurting, you won’t ask him to fuck you.
It’s not like he doesn’t want you. Of course he does. It’s the sympathy in your eyes when he gets tired from just a couple of minutes of thrusting that he hates. The whispered, “It’s okay. baby, I can ride you.” The gentle touches across his body and his neck and his face and his beard. It all reeks of pity. And if you were to sit him down one day and ask him why he hates being taken care of, he wouldn’t have an answer. He would push the voice in his head down into the void that all the strength he had left fell in, the voice shrinking until it’s nothing as it screams, because I’ve never been taken care of, and I would’ve loved it back when being taken care of wasn’t my only choice.
But it’s fine. You wouldn’t ever ask him that question because he knows for a fact that you don’t know. If you did, you wouldn’t be climbing onto his lap quietly, hands rubbing his sides as you press kisses to his neck.
“I missed you, Logan,” You whisper. Your hips aren’t moving; He knows he sat here like this to avoid fucking you, but he almost wishes you were seeking exactly that. Sex, as embarrassing as it would be for him, is better than your sick love. He doesn’t think you love in the way lovers do. It’s the kind of love meant for sick puppies, or the lonely old woman sitting on the bus with all her belongings in plastic bags.
He turns his head to take a drag of his cigar. Silence.
You hold his face, forcing him to look at you as you kiss him. Slow, chaste, no tongue. He feels scrutinized by your touches, and something nervous seats itself deep in his belly.
“How was your day?” You ask, your gaze snapping between his eyes.
Logan closes them. “I’m tired,” He says flatly.
“I know. It’s okay.”
There it is again. Pity.
He scoffs. It’s quiet. Barely there. He didn’t mean to. He watches your face fall the smallest bit. A year ago, he wouldn’t have noticed, and if he would’ve, he would blurt out an apology. Now, he does notice, but he secretly wants to watch it fall even further if it means you’ll realize how much you’ve been hurting him.
You swallow, your thumb rubbing his cheekbone. “I found an American poetry anthology in the basement today. 20th Century. My favorite poem was in it.”
He mumbles, “In a Station of the Metro. T.S. Elliot.” Remembering the poem you told him about months ago sounds too much like sorry. He wishes he’d pretended to forget.
“Ezra Pound,” You correct. Your smile tells him he’s forgiven for an apology he never offered. “If you can recite it I’ll be impressed.”
“I’m not reciting a goddamn poem.” He sounds sarcastic, and it relieves you, but then you kiss him and he’s wound tight again.
You sigh as you pull back. “What’s bothering you, baby?”
“Nothing’s bothering—”
“What’s bothering you?” You interject.
He shakes his head, clenching his jaw. He makes the decision to sacrifice his dignity for the sake of stopping this conversation. You never could resist an orgasm, especially one caused by him. “Enough of that.”
“What?”
But he’s putting out his cigar and lifting you off his lap with a suppressed grunt, then pushing you down on the couch.
“Logan,” You protest.
He continues undoing the drawstring of your pajamas, with a kind of slippery urgency that tells you he's trying to shut you up more than he's trying to satiate his own desire.
You sit up straight, swatting his hand away. “Stop.”
He withdraws immediately, breathing hard through his nose as he looks down at the floor. He was wrong, before, about you not knowing. You definitely know, because you don’t place a loving hand on his thigh and you don’t kiss his shoulder. He’s grateful.
Instead, you observe his profile, then the quiet tremor in his hand. The impossible stillness of the rest of him. He tends to do that when his nerves are on fire. Thinks being a statue is what people who aren’t in chronic pain do.
“Don’t do that,” He mumbles, feeling your eyes on him. “I don’t need you feeling sorry, or whatever—whatever the fuck else goes through your head when you’re around me.”
You say nothing. That’s the most he’s said about his feelings in a while. He knows it, so he forces himself to say nothing, too. It doesn’t last long.
“I’m not dying.” His voice cracks a little at the end and he fights the urge to squeeze his eyes shut.
“I know.” The words come out in a tumble, as if you’re rushing to participate in his lie.
“Then stop looking at me like I’m dying.”
“Okay.” Tears prickle your eyes but you blink them away.
“Okay,” He repeats.
You take a deep breath. “But it’s okay to be cared for, Logan.”
He laughs incredulously, and suddenly his volume is rising and his voice is firm. “Would you just—Would you just quit being my fuckin’ mommy? Would you?”
He only lets your silence marinate for a second before he rushes in to kiss you, ignoring the cramps in his muscles as he tugs your neck forward roughly. You squeak against his mouth, fighting his impossible grip on you, but you give up with a shaky exhale through your nose when your efforts prove useless.
“I can take care of you, too,” He grits out. It would sound sweet if it weren’t for the frustration in his tone. He pushes you onto the couch the same way he did moments before as he opens your legs by your knees and settles between them. He sucks a dark mark onto your neck, his fingers digging bruises in your ribs.
“I know you can,” You reassure him. You can see where this is going. “And I love when you do.” You gasp when he pulls your shirt up over the curve of your breasts.
“No. You don’t.” He pinches one of your nipples and sucks the other into his mouth for a brief second. “It’s okay. I’ll show you so you don’t forget again. You won’t want to get ruined any other way.”
“Logan,” You sigh.
He hums against the soft skin just underneath your breast as his hands ravage your body. He begins to unsheathe the adamantium claws in one of his hands so he can rip your top open. It’s slow and excruciating, so he closes his eyes, but the pain is over too soon and his suspicions are confirmed when he opens his eyes to see them stuck halfway.
You don’t expect him to lean back and individually tug each blade free. There’s blood, and now it’s dripping onto your belly, and he mumbles something that sounds like an apology as he wipes the dots of red away with his thumb.
But the hazel in his eyes is alive again. You hope it’s you that did that. Hope it’s not the pain or the sight of his own blood. You want to ask him, just to make sure. You don’t like hurting, right? You just really like me—
He slices through your shirt, careful not to graze your skin, and you try to ignore the fact that he’s never that cautious with himself, but you can’t.
“Logan, you’re bleeding.” Your voice is unstable.
“It’ll heal,” He says quickly, passively. He wipes his burning palm on his wifebeater.
“But that takes a long time now.”
He meets your eyes, his movements frozen. He’s angry and you’re not stupid. You’re pitying him again. He needs you to stop fucking pitying him. When he speaks, his voice is deep and rough and slow, and you would be scared if he wasn’t your Logan. “Are you done?”
You don’t know what to say, so you just close your eyes and nod. You hear his claws retract faster than when they came out, and almost simultaneously, he’s shoving that same hand under your waistband as two of his calloused fingers push themselves into your cunt.
You arch toward him involuntarily, a ragged moan falling from your lips as he tugs your pajamas off your legs and spits on your pussy to ease the slide of his fingers.
Each groan he pulls from your throat is a step toward dispelling the doubt from your body. Doubt of his capabilities, of his strength, of his devotion to you.
“Beg me to fuck you,” He demands, fingering you roughly.
Your mind is cloudy at this point, from sadness or arousal or both, but you give him what he wants. “Fuck me,” You whisper, your eyelids about to flutter shut as you shed a tear.
But then you catch Logan smiling.
He grabs your jaw with his free hand, and you look at him immediately. “You’re gonna let me use it, right? Get myself off?” You lazily trace his features with your gaze—His nose, his wrinkles, his beard—because you know if it were your fingers instead he’d mistake it for tenderness and get mad again.
You nod, but it’s weak with how hazy everything is.
“Good girl.” 
“Please,” You sigh, “I need you inside of me. I need to—I need it.”
“I know. I know what you’re feeling before you feel it.” He lets the pad of his thumb draw quick circles on your clit. “What? Thought I couldn’t hear you playing with yourself in the shower? If I can hear your heartbeat when I walk through the door, what makes you think I wouldn’t have heard you whining my name?”
“Logan,” You sigh, your hips lifting off the couch, coaxing his fingers deeper for as long as possible before he’s shoving you back down with the heel of his palm.
“I’m gonna play with you now. I’ll fuck you after, don’t worry your pretty head about it.”
“What do you mean, play with me?” You breathe, fighting to keep your eyes open as he finds your g-spot.
He grins dirtily, in a way that makes your head spin and your thighs clench around his hand. You’re barely processing his words as he bends down to mumble in your ear, “Right when you’re about to make a mess on my fingers, I’m gonna stop. Then I’m gonna go down on you. And I’m gonna lick your pretty pussy, maybe even fuck you with my tongue if you’re good. And guess what? Guess what I’m gonna do when you’re this close?”
“You’re gonna stop,” You whine.
“I’m gonna stop,” He nods, and it’s mocking, but it’s gentle, and he’s fucking killing you with the way he’s talking right now. “But I’m not mean. I’ll give you a break. You can calm down when my dick is in your mouth, okay?”
“Okay,” You breathe, your hips unabashedly grinding on his fingers. But you want to reassure him he is mean, and you especially want to tell him how much you love it. “Logan, I’m gonna—”
He withdraws his fingers from you so fast it almost burns. You clench around nothing, your lower half spasming as your orgasm barely approaches before falling away again. Only a hint of pleasure is able to make it through the cracks, and you cling onto it, hoping if you focus hard enough, the wave will come back. It doesn’t. You should regret warning Logan that you were about to finish, but all you feel is comfort now that he’s finally proud of you again.
Another tear streams down the side of your face, landing in your hair. Logan’s watching you as he pets your thigh, his lips parted when he leans down over you. He kisses your wet cheek softly, his beard rough on your skin. It’s unlike him to offer you affection this gracefully during sex. It’s always shaky limbs and suppressed groans and dirty kisses. Both of you know it. 
He moves down your body, until his face is hovering over your cunt. He doesn’t have his reading glasses on, so he has to pull his head back and squint as he spreads your folds with his thumbs, studying what you look like. He licks a stripe over you. A second, longer one, before he zeroes in on your clit. You can do nothing except lay there and take it as your hips twitch from overstimulation under his firm hands.
“Oh my god,” You whisper, your fingers twisting in his hair. “F-Fuck.”
He moans at that, pressed right up against you, the sound deep and delicious and vibrating. “Feel good?” He asks teasingly with a nip to your inner thigh.
“What do—What the fuck do you think?”
He breathes a laugh. It’s short and airy, not frustrated like before, and a warmth ignites itself in the back of your mind. It’s overpowering even the feeling of his mouth licking and sucking your most sensitive area; It’s the relief that he’s still hiding the Logan you fell in love with somewhere in there.
You wind your fingers in his hair and scratch his scalp. You try to do it lovingly, although it comes across as sexual and Logan’s breath hitches in pleasure against your pussy instead. So as you suppress a gasp from the pure skill of his tongue, you show your affection differently—you hold the wounded hand he has resting face-up beside your hip. The cuts embedded there are easy to avoid as your thumb rubs the lines of his palm, because even though you can’t see his hand, the puffiness surrounding each slash on his skin are your cues.
He doesn’t move his hand away, but his tongue falters for a fraction of a second before slowing down.
The kind of love you’re pressing into Logan’s skin with each gentle stroke is unrecognizable to him. It’s not the pitiful love he’s so used to. He thinks it might be the opposite. Admiration. Reverence.
“I’m so empty,” You whisper, bringing your hands to grope Logan’s biceps. They’re sweaty and hard and flexing under your touch, and you wonder if he would let you ride them one day.
When your climax starts to creep up on you, it’s thanks to the image of Logan forcing you to lick your arousal clean off his bicep. Indulgently swirling your tongue along his pronounced veins, savoring the taste of his sweat mixed with yourself. He’d probably say somthing like, fuckin’ filthy. Getting yourself off on my arm. Who does that? Are you that obsessed with me?
Logan feels you squeezing his tongue, harder than all the other times before, so he withdraws at the last moment, ruining your orgasm once again.
 You convulse silently, your breath coming out stuttered with your twitching jaw. As if he can read your mind, he unbuckles his belt and removes his pants and boxers. But he doesn’t strip himself of his wifebeater, stained with blood.
It’s the hottest thing in the world.
You blink, and suddenly Logan is hovering above you with his cock over your face. He rubs his leaking tip on your cheeks first, then your lips, and when you open your mouth to take him, he moves his cock away and nudges your jaw shut with his free hand, shaking his head.
“Not yet.”
A whine lodges itself in your throat as Logan spreads his pre-come over the plush of your lips. It escapes only when he lets go of his cock in favor of massaging his wetness across your lips and on your tongue with his thumb. His hard cock is bobbing above you, almost tantalizingly, the occasional drip of arousal landing itself somewhere near your eyes, then your hair, then your mouth, and you watch Logan’s brow furrow as you try to lick whatever you can.
His resolve snaps. A calloused hand squeezes at your cheeks until your jaw falls open. His cock is in your mouth before you can process it, thick and heavy and wet. So. Incredibly. Wet. You start to wonder how it’s even possible that he’s this hard at his age, but you know he wouldn’t want you to be wondering that, so you happily push the thought away.
You suck your cheeks in, swirling your tongue around his tip as you bob your head to meet the subtle, almost imperceivable thrust of his hips. You’re taking it well, you know you are. So you keep taking it, until Logan can no longer successfully suppress his moans and his hips are jerking out of rhythm.
He moves back until his cock slips out of your mouth. “I don’t wanna come like this. Wanna fuck you.”
“Yeah, yes. Fuck me. Please.”
He stands up and turns you on your front, your knees pressing into the soft couch cushions with your ass in the air.
“Logan,” You plead as you feel his tip pressing at your entrance.
“I’ve got you,” He says quietly, pushing in until half of his cock is comfortably squeezed by your cunt. Both your breathing is loud and labored, and there’s a specific kind of intimacy in knowing you’re both feeling this identical need. Overwhelming and hot and unquenchable by anything other than each other.
His first thrust is shallow, but it ruins you all the same. With how thick he is, it should feel like an intrusion, and it does. But all you can think about is how perfectly he fits inside of you, filling you extraordinarily with only a few inches.
“Fuck,” Logan breathes. “Look at that.” He traces around your entrance with his thumb. “Stretching so wide to take me.”
You moan, pressing your cheek against the sofa as you rock with his thrusts. He still hasn’t pressed all the way in yet, and you’re growing impatient. “Come on,” You urge, pushing yourself back to force more of his cock into you.
You expect him to chastise you for being so greedy, but he listens to you instead with a slow, full thrust. His tip nudges your cervix with how deep he is, and a ragged moan escapes you. “Yes,” You whine, “Oh god, yes.”
Logan’s breaths are coming out heavy through his nose, quick and occasionally intertwined with a grunt. His thrusts are getting quicker, and it’s starting to burn, but you welcome every sensation he has to offer you. He pulls out, spits on his cock, then shoves himself back inside, and this time you’re both unabashedly moaning the minute you’re joined again. 
His fingers dig in the plush of your ass as he observes himself disappearing into you. It hurts, but you love it. He knows you do, so he spanks you quickly before gripping you and rutting against you again.
“I love when you fuck me,” You whisper, feeling ashamed as soon as the confession leave you. “When you properly fuck me.”
He slows for a moment so he can watch his cock glisten with how wet you are. “I know.” He picks back up his punishing pace.
Your eyes begin to water, from pain or pleasure, you can’t tell. “I love you.”
“I know,” He repeats, this time breathier. His hips stutter. You can tell he’s close.
“I want it on my face,” You tell him quickly, his impending orgasm giving you no time to worry about being too forward.
He pulls out again, letting you turn onto your back as he shifts up your body. He jerks himself furiously, but you swat his hand away and take it upon yourself to stroke him.
“Come for me,” You tell him honestly, softly. His eyes squeeze shut and his lips part around a trembling exhale.
He groans as his release coats your face in long stripes. Some of it even lands in your hair, but you don’t care. Your own fingers work your clit as you stick your tongue out and taste him. Logan bends down to kiss you, chest heaving and hands shaky, and you rub yourself faster as you swap his release between the two of you with a hum. He pulls back to let you swallow, then he kisses your cheeks with his rough beard, uncaring about the mess on your face.
You don’t know you’re coming until it’s over and you’re breathless, and it’s almost excruciating with how much he’s ruined you, but you’re so exhausted you can’t find it in yourself to dwell on it a second longer.
You wrap your arms around his neck and tug him down for another kiss because you can hardly remember the one he just gave you.
“I’m sorry I had been treating you all wrong,” You say carefully.
“It doesn’t matter anymore.” His voice is rough.
You nod, your lips brushing his as you smooth sweaty strands of hair away from his forehead. These touches are hard for him. Any variation of your chaste affection is a reminder that he’s not really Logan anymore.
But the shame in it is gone. Replaced by the reassurance that he can still surround you with safety and firm hands and blatant desire;
And for a moment, he’s his old self again.
A/N: it's been so long since i've written anything, but logan has been consuming my brain for weeks so i had to get this out. i hope it's true to his character. <3 also, my asks are open, so feel free to request anything you want to read about.
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devil-in-hiding · 6 months ago
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Okay but Virgin!Reader who is absolutely terrified of intimacy. It’s not a lack of knowledge on the subject; she’s knows more about it than a retired pornstar. But she just can’t handle the thought of giving herself away, especially to someone she doesn’t know or feels like she can’t trust! Back where she comes from, trust is a privilege and respect is a must. But what happens when she meets brutal, gruff, and one hundred and ten percent dangerous Simon Riley, who’s way more experienced and has a history of fucking just to let off some steam.
Ughhhhh 😵‍💫
Simon is your neighbor. Your first interaction is when he almost knocks you over in the hall, only offering a grunt and cold glare before slamming his apartment door shut.
It remains that way for a year or so, the rare times you do see him home. Nothing is ever said, but he acknowledges you with a grunt, and you always return a small nod of greeting. He’s cold and gruff, but every time he gets home from wherever he goes, you have to hole up in the living room to escape the moans and his headboard banging into your wall. the following mornings you can hardly look him in the eye as he stares at you rushing towards the stairs.
It’s not until after a particularly bad date, who is stubbornly trying to invite himself into your apartment, that Simon actually speaks.
“Jake please, I had a nice time but I have to get up early for work.” You protest, trying to block your doorway and the guy scoffs. “C’mon, you gonna leave me hangin like that?” He frowns, trying to shoulder past you.
“I would like you to leave now.”
“Listen here you little bitch, I’ve had to put up with staring at that rack all night, the least you can do is-“
“Think the lady told you to get the fuck out mate.” A deep voice growls, and the two of you jump, and your eyes widen at seeing Simon there, and there’s a dark look in his eyes as he stares down your ‘date’
“Hey man, this is none of you-“
“Considering this nice woman is my neighbor, I’m making it my fucking business.” He states before quite literally lifting Jake by the scruff of his neck and throwing him out into the hallway. “I see you bothering her again and I’ll kick your sorry ass up and down this god damn complex you got that?”
Jake is gone before Simon is done talking. You hear him take a deep breath, shoulders relaxing before he turns to face you, and you’re surprised by the concern showing in his eyes.
“That fuckhead didn’t hurt you, did he?” He asks, and you’re shocked this man’s voice can be so soft. You’re frozen, just staring at him before you find your voice.
“N-no, no I’m okay, he was just trying to shoulder past me.” You stutter out, nervously playing with your fingers. Your heart stops when one of his large hands reaches up, gently brushing your hair away from your face.
“Sorry it took me so long, couldn’t tell if it was you I was hearing.” He admits, and your heart flutters. He knows your voice?
He talks to you more after that, helping you with groceries when your hands are full, stopping by to ask if you’d watch his apartment while he’s away on deployment. You start to look forward to the two knocks on your door, finding Simon waiting for you, crinkles around his eyes letting you know he’s smiling at you.
But the women still come, along with your nights camped out in the living room, you’re heart just a bit heavier every time.
(might turn this into something)
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irisinluv · 5 months ago
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Isekaied as the Yandere Villain!? PT 1
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All I could do was stare at my reflection. This had to be a joke. I was going to wake up in my bed, right this instant.
“FUCK!”
Ok, so, pinching myself hurts. That’s fine. This is like. Some sort of lucid dream. What do they say to do if you’re lucid dreaming? Oh, that’s right, put your finger in your palm, it’ll phase through!
I resist the urge to scream as my finger meets solid flesh.
You see, I’m not in the right body. Or the right world from what I can tell. No, I’m supposed to be back home, waking up in a panic as I realize my alarm didn’t go off cuz my phone died after I stayed up way too late reading manga.
But of course, I’m not late to work, I’m in a lavish bedchamber right out of the latest webcomic I’d been reading! And by the looks of it…. I’m the crown princes crazy fiancé! As much as I love reading about the Isekai trope, I never wanted to be in one! And come on- as the Yandere Villain!? Couldn’t this at least be original? There’s hundred of stories just like “my next life as a villainess,” why couldn’t I be like… a stable hand or something? Ugh. Ok. Think!
I need to get home. Do the protagonists ever get back home in the stories I read? I pace around my room and rack my brain over every webcomic I’ve ever read, every manga I waited in line for, every anime I binged, even the unfinished manhwas! I can’t think of a single fucking one where they get home?
Well this isn’t going to stop me. I have a cat who’s going to absolutely flip if she’s not given fresh kibble in the morning. She has enough in her bowl for another 2 days but she needs it topped off ok! She’s a princess! I can’t be stuck here! Who’s going to throw her pompom toy for her if I’m not there???
What did all these have in common? What’s the barebones trope layout? Ok let’s see
1) person either died or falls asleep and wakes up in a new world…. Check
2) person is the villain!…. Check
3) to avoid the characters terrible death, person tries to change the story, ends up being new protagonist…
Ohhh… hey…. Do these Isekai characters ever just…. Play along? Even the “reincarnated as a baby” ones, they only play along till they’re old enough to try to run away or rework the political structure of the entire city. Maybe that’s it. Make it to the books natural end, and you’ll wake up where you belong. It’s like when you get part of a song stuck in your head. Play the whole song, and it’ll get out.
Ok, I’ve trained most of my adult life for this- I can totally ace this trope! I just have to stalk the crown prince, act totally in love with him, and be a bitch to the female lead. Then my finance will leave me, I’ll do some crazy dramatic act to try to kill the female lead, and then I’ll be exiled or executed, and wake up to feed my cat. How hard can it be?
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Hard. It’s very hard.
Where the hell did he go!? My fiancé, the crown prince Eric, was JUST HERE. I swear! He turned that corner back there and then went down this hall… at least I think it was this hall? Ugh! This is impossible! For someone with such loud shoes and an armed escort, you’d think he’d be easier to follow! Now my feet just hurt. They don’t make these fancy shoes to run around the castle all day. They’re meant to daintily peek from beneath my many skirts as I host a tea party or some shit.
Ok. I’ve got this! I’ll just peek into each room until I find him, maybe I can get a better feel for the layout, or maybe find his office and see if he has a schedule or a day planner or something I can use to make this whole stalking thing easier.
I begin snooping, and it’s a bit of thrill to be honest! Back in my real life, I’m the kind of person to hide a wrapper deep in the trash can if I’m babysitting, sitting on the floor playing a game on my phone after the kid goes to bed rather than “making myself at home” the way the parents insisted as they showed me how to access Netflix. I’ve never been a snooper. Now…. Well. It’s totally on brand for this character! I’m not me, I’m a psycho lovesick fool! I giggle a bit at that as my fingers trail over a shelf of beautiful pottery in some sort of sitting room.
“What’s so amusing dearest?”
I practically screech as my heart leaps to my throat and I whirl around, and see the very person I’d been searching for has snuck up on ME…. That’s so unfair!
“W-what? O-oh! Nothing! I was just- uh, admiring the pottery?”
I stutter out as I try to recall how to act like a human being while simultaneously trying to stop feeling my own pulse in my ears. The idiot has the nerve to LAUGH! Full on snort and everything!
“What are you doing in this wing anyways? Weren’t you meant to be out riding today?”
Shit. I was so busy trying to figure out his schedule, I didn’t consider maybe the body I was shoved into had a schedule of her own. Ok. Play it cool- I’ve got this!
“Yes, well, I decided I wasn’t in the mood and wanted to stay in today instead.”
His brows furrow
“Oh, but you love riding? Are you feeling ill? I can fetch the royal physician for you if you-“
“No! That’s- that’s quite alright! I simply wanted a change of schedule, that is all. Um… what about you? What are your plans for the day?”
He looked a bit surprised at that, and a small smile danced on his lips.
“I was just going to the library to do some paperwork, boring stuff really, and then of course our dinner at its regular time.”
I nod like that means anything to me. Ok think, if I were crazy in love with this man, what would I say?
“Would you like some company? Reading in the library sounds really nice, maybe we could have some tea as well?”
Ok. I’m already fucking this up. He looks confused…. God damnit …. I knew I shouldn’t have skimmed over those early chapters- but the translation was shit ok!?
“Well… I’d actually love that. But are you sure? You haven’t exactly shown interest in reading, and you’ve never requested something like this before…. In fact I don’t think I can recall the last time we’ve interacted outside of dinner or a scheduled social event in… well. Ever.”
Wait…. What? Isn’t my character like goo-goo-ga-ga over him? Are you telling me she never asks to just… spend time with her lover? They only talk during dinner and parties or whatever?
“Of course, I think it’ll be relaxing! Just lead the way!”
My brain is working overtime as I smile politely at him as we reach the library and I pretend to browse for books. I’m missing something here. What is-
Oh. Shit. That’s right. I’m supposed to be really insecure and awkward about him. That’s why she stalks him- she spends all her free time obsessing over this man from the shadows, threatening the competition…. Yet chokes up when it comes to how to act natural. Her inferiority complex is what drives her entire character. And then to him, they’re just two nobles in an arranged marriage who speak on dull subjects like the weather and horse rides…. And who barely interact.
This must have been a real big shake up, she always stays out of sight, they never run into each other by chance. And she certainly never would ask to sit and read with him…. Maybe watch him do his work from a hidden keyhole somewhere, but that’s right…. She IS more of a traditional lady with her hobbies. She was raised to be the perfect noble wife, so naturally, her hobbies include things like dancing, needlepoint, and horse riding. The only studies she’s interested in are etiquette and things that noble ladies are supposed to know.
Well…. Shit. That’s so like me to already have fucked this up. But that’s ok. That’s ok- he’s going to meet the female lead and fall in love and so I just have to be the obstacle they need to overcome. Surely the details don’t matter too much…. It’s my first day in the job ok? Not everyone’s perfect!
I find a book that honestly actually sounds interesting, it’s historical, but it’s giving Hellen of Troy, the closest to a dark romance I think I’ll get from an academic personal library like this. I settle into what looks like the comfiest chair in the central area, and begin reading. The prince and I exist comfortably, the only sound being the scratch of his pen, and the occasional rustle of paper as he flips a document or I finish a page. We continue like this for several hours until he puts down his pen and clears his throat, getting my attention.
“I know it’s a long way from dinner…. But I was thinking I’d grab something light for a mid day meal and then take a walk about the gardens …. Would you care to join me?”
Honestly, some lunch and pretty royal gardens sounds like so much fun, so I agree. As we begin walking, I ponder how I can recover from all this.
You know what.. this can totally still go to plan. This is just me being the evil villain and sinking my claws into him! The female lead will appear, and I’ll reveal my true, nasty side to her! She’ll have to fight to save the prince from his marriage to me!
*insert evil laughter!*
“You’re smiling.”
“W-what?”
“A smile. It suits you. You’ve been doing that a lot today….. I like it.”
Ok and now I’m blushing. I go to reply when I suddenly find myself weightless for a moment, and then hit the ground with a hard thump.
“Ow! What the-!?”
My eyes snap up and glare at this pretty blonde girl who just rammed into me, and sent me flying
“Do you not know how to watch where you’re going!? Owww…. Ugh.”
Ok I’m sorry I’m usually a nice and understanding person but I’ve never been literally knocked over before! Who does that to a person?
Eric helps me to my feet and sends a reproachful glare toward the girl, asking me if I’m alright with most concerned look…. And the girl gasps and says,
“C-crown prince Eric! I apologize! I’d didn’t recognize you!”
She drops into a curtsy and lowers her eyes all demure and modest as if she hadn’t just bulldozed me. I send an incredulous look toward Eric…. She… didn’t see HIM? I’m the one she took out? He gives me an equally puzzled look and so I decide, you know what, fuck it. I’m this evil person in this world…. I need to act like it!
“And not recognizing his highness is an excuse for taking out the princess consort, soon to be crown princess? Are you blind or just daft?”
Oh my god I really just called someone daft! This feels like when you stay up late thinking all the witty comebacks you could’ve used against your high school bullies, except actually using them in the moment!
And Eric is being a sweetie and letting me handle this, waiting expectantly for blondie to answer me, just prompting her,
“Well?”
“Forgive me…. Princess consort…. You are right. My oversight in inexcusable. It appears neither of us were looking where we were going. I hope we can start fresh!”
I scoff- that’s it? Who does this bitch think she is? Yes, I was looking at Eric, but I was going a walking pace, who rounds a corner with so much force that you knock someone over?
Suddenly something clicks- oh shit! This is the female lead!!!! This scene happened in the story, just without the prince here. This is good, that means this is on track. Although I gotta say- I was much more on the female main characters side when reading it. Now, I just feel like she’s one of those mean girls in high school who’s not *technically* doing anything mean. Anyways- what was I supposed to say? That’s right.
“Yes…. Well. I’m sure we won’t be seeing much of each other anyways. If you’ll excuse me-“
Nailed ittttt…. Now her line?
“Well, actually…. My name is Lady Cressida, and I’ll be staying in the place for several months as my father is a foreign ambassador overseeing trade agreements with his highness the king. So I imagine we will be seeing *plenty* of each other. That goes for you too your highness! So please- forgive me, I look forward to getting to know each of you better!”
Oh that’s so cool, seeing her recite the lines from the story. But ok- I have a role to play as well. I scoff and grab Eric’s arm, pulling him behind me as I storm off, playing the part of entitled lover, stuck up and irritated at this ambassadors daughter who DARED to speak to my love.
Yea, this will work, Eric will think Cressida is a genuine sweetie, and see me as being the unreasonable bitch who’s refusing to accept her apology, or apologize for not looking where I was going either. And now I’m manhandling him- totally unlady like. God I’m killing this aren’t I? Minimum wage job and demanding cat, here I come!
What I don’t see, as I lead Eric by the arm, is the cold glare he shoots towards Cressida, before smiling down at our connected hands, an unreadable look in his eyes.
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Part 2
SERIES IS DISCONTINUED- sorry y’all, just not inspired to write this anymore and don’t wanna force it.
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reidrum · 7 months ago
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close to home | s.r
pairing: spencer reid x reader
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a/n: this has been rotting in my brain for days now i hope you enjoy the angsty comfort this brought me <3 my requests are open (guidelines in pinned!) or if you wanna just chat hop in my ask box :) gonna hopefully work on a smut fic in the next week so keep an eye out hehe
cw: angst, hurt/comfort, protective!spencer, afab!reader who uses she/her pronouns, non bau!reader, cm type violence, reader sustains injuries from unsub, vague description of injuries, maeve mentions, derek being a good friend, spencer being so in love with reader, this takes place probably a year after maeve, inconsistencies with tls and characters but who cares
wc: 2.4k
summary: the bau is working a local case when their unsub strikes again mid investigation, hotch tells reid and morgan to go check it out but spencer finds the address of the crime to be a little too familar
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Whenever the BAU has a case based in the D.C. area, it’s always a little easier on the team. Familiar stomping grounds, ease of resources, no major time difference, and everyone can sleep in their own beds. The hard part about home cases is knowing there’s a serial killer in the place they know deeply, with people they cared about deeply.
Spencer and Callahan are in the middle of the bullpen staring at the giant white board with all the evidence they have so far. The unsub has been killing women in their mid 20s in the local dc area, with the mo currently unknown. there had already been two victims, both killed in their homes. Spencer was currently trying to analyze all the information the case had alongside with what Garcia was able to provide, and he was still hitting a dead end. Morgan had joined them at some point too, trying to offer what he could remember from the crime scenes but to no avail. He felt his eyes straining and dropping so he decided to get more coffee, but was stopped by Hotch and Garcia entering the bullpen.
“Police just got a 911 call about a break in, but there’s a witness this time. She was home when it happened and it looks like he didn’t expect that and tried to knock her out before escaping. I think it sounds like our unsub. Morgan and Reid, I need you to go check out the scene and interview the witness, see what she remembers.” Hotch explained.
Morgan and Reid nodded as Garcia spoke up, “I just sent the address to your phones, it’s a house on Hillcrest so it's not that far from here.”
Spencer froze. he had to have heard wrong, she did not say Hillcrest, “Did you say Hillcrest?”
“Yeah, Hillcrest Drive. It’s like, a 15 minute drive, not that far.”
He felt his heart drop to his feet, a sinking feeling building in his gut. That was the street you lived on. He tried to ground himself with logic, the probability of it being your house is only 10%, but he was dreading asking the fated question.
“Garcia, what’s the house number?”
“Reid, I already sent it to your pho-“
“Garcia, what is the house number,” he spoke again. 
Please don’t say 1159. Please don’t say 1159. Please don’t say-
“1159.”
Fuck. The color drained from his face, and the nausea was building to a head quickly. Spencer hurriedly tried to think through the last time he spoke to you. Last night? This morning? He doesn’t check on you as much as he does when he’s not on a case, but oh my god why can’t he remember the last time he saw you.
“Reid,” Hotch bellows, finally breaking spencer out of his trance, “What is it? What do you know?”
He shook his head, “Nothing. Morgan, let’s go.” he grabbed his jacket and booked it out the door.
Morgan, Garcia, and Hotch all looked at each other in concern, before Morgan spoke up, “I’ll see what’s up.” The latter two nodded softly, though the worry didn’t let up in their eyes.
Morgan walked up to the car to find Spencer repeatedly trying to call someone on the phone, clearly unable to get through and getting really frustrated.
Spencer was alerted by Morgan’s presence hearing the car unlock but he didn’t even look at him, just immediately got in the car and strapped his seat belt. Morgan joined him in the drivers seat giving him a wary look before turning the car on and pulling out of the bureau.
“Okay Reid, spill it. It’s obvious you know who lives here.” Morgan speaks up.
“Just drive, please.”
“Because if you know something, something that could help the case, it would be helpful if we knew.”
“Morgan, just drive.” he borderline yells.
He raises his eyebrows at his raised voice, “Listen kid, i’m just trying to help you. I can see you’re upset but we’re on the same side, you know that.”
Spencer takes a shaky breath, feeling another shade of guilt at yelling at one of his friends, for something he didn’t even know about. He’d kept you a secret for many reasons— your relationship with him was still new, and he just wanted to keep you to himself for a bit. After what happened with Maeve, he felt especially more responsible at keeping you safe and making sure you didn’t get tangled up in his line of work.
Some job he did of that.
The one thing he regrets about how he handled the Maeve situation, was not asking for help until it was almost too late. For not doing anything about her stalker when he was part of one of the most famous fbi teams built to find people like that. He’d always live with that guilt, but he vowed not to do that with you.
He loved you so much. You were so kind, and smart, and beautiful. A breath of fresh air after feeling lost in a dark tunnel for so long. You were so understanding when he explained what he did for a living, and what had happened to him and people he cared about as a result. He still remembers what you said to him when he told you that you could have an out, if you wanted.
“Any risk is worth taking if getting to be with you is the consolation prize.”
Tears welled up in eyes thinking about the memory. If you were willing to take any risk, then he should be able to as well.
He cleared his throat, and Morgan’s ears perked up, “My uh, my girlfriend lives there. Where the unsub, at- attacked.” he voiced softly.
Morgan looked at him for a beat while driving, Spencer missing the way his face dropped. He tightened his hands on the wheels, and without hesitation he turned the lights and siren on and shifted gears to speed up.
__
The car pulled onto your street and the first thing Spencer sees is the flashing light of the ambulances. Morgan doesn’t even put the car in park before Spencer’s bolting out hoping he can find you quickly.
He’s asking all the paramedics he’s passing if they’ve seen you or know if you’re being treated, were you transferred to a hospital and he didn’t know. The tunnel vision slowly overtaking him until he hears a voice breaking through like sunlight call out his name.
He whips his head in the direction he heard it come from, and he’s never been more grateful to be met with the beautiful sight of you. You watch his eyes widen and let out a sigh before running over to where you were sitting in the back of the ambulance. He’s definitely not thinking when he goes in to hug you, not even knowing the extent of your injuries. He’s overtaken by the desperate need to hold you in his arms so he knows you’re safe and okay.
“Hi,” you choke out muffled, “Funny seeing you here.”
He pulls back to inspect your face, taking note of a small cut above your left eyebrow and the beginning splotches of a bruise forming on your lower jaw. His heart aches so much looking at you, knowing what happened to you and who did this to you.
“Hi, honey,” he lets out tearfully, “Are you okay? I mean, of course you’re not. But what did the paramedics say? Did they give you anything? Are you sure they checked all your injuries? You know what, let me go call the guy over. I’ll be two seconds.” his panicked ramble fading off as he rounds the truck you’re sat in to find the emt.
Upon his extensive questioning of the man who treated you, he found out that you had sustained a minor concussion from when the unsub swung at you with an umbrella, superficial cuts caused by a broken vase you threw to defend yourself, and a dislocated shoulder from getting shoved into the wall.
You were okay, but at what cost.
The EMT leaves you two and Spencer sits himself next to you on the rig. He wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you as tight as he can and the other hand cradles your head into the crook of his neck, holding you so tight he’s hoping he can squeeze the bad memories out of you. It’s at this moment of feeling safe and sound in his arms when the adrenaline of your attack wears off.
Spencer hears a small whimper and feels a few hot tears trickle down his neck, your breathing gets faster as you’re attempting to beat your body’s fear response. The slow build up of sobs starting to rack your chest, and he immediately holds you tighter.
“It’s over, baby, they won’t hurt you anymore. I promise.”
You sniffle, “I know, I just can’t believe this happened. To me. To us. It’s not fair to you.” trailing off the last two words.
“To me? Wh- what do you mean?”
You take a deep breath, “I don’t mean to bring it up again, I just know how eerily similar this is to a past experience you’ve had. and I hoped that I wouldn’t be in a position to make you feel that way again. I don’t know why this happened, I'm sorry.”
He looked down at you incredulously, genuinely unable to believe that you were sitting next to him on an ambulance, beaten up with bruises and scars after a home invasion attack, worried about how he would feel when he got to you. It was enough to finally let the swell of tears saved up in his eyes fall.
“Oh sweetheart,” he chokes out, realizing you’ve been trying to be brave for him this whole time, “What happened is not your fault, do you understand me? My job is to always worry about you and your safety. When Garcia said the address I…I couldn’t even process it, I don’t even know how I got to the car,” he shook his head, “But I am the last person you need to push your emotions down for. I will always take them in stride and love you even more for that, okay?”
“Okay,” you take a shaky breath, “I love you.”
“I love you.” he leans down to press a kiss to the crown of your head.
Both of your heads look up at an approaching figure, who you quickly recognize to be SSA Derek Morgan. You knew Spencer hadn’t told the team about you yet, so you tried to sit up independently as fast as you could before he came over and suspected something.
Spencer’s grip didn’t let up when he bent down and whispered, “It’s okay, he knows.” You look up at him with wide eyes when derek finally reaches you.
“Reid, I already talked to the detectives and we’re good to go when you’re ready,” he turns his body to you and gives you a comforting smile, “Hi sweetheart, I’m Derek Morgan, it’s nice to meet you.”
Spencer rolls his eyes at the nickname while you giggle softly, “Hi Derek, I’ve heard so much about you. It's nice to finally meet you too.”
“I wish it were under better circumstances,” he sighs, “Listen, I know it’s all still really fresh for you, but it might help the case if you’re able to come in for a cognitive interview, or even talk to a sketch artist.”
Spencer doesn’t miss a beat before protesting, “Absolutely not. We can do it later, it’s fine.”
“Reid-“
You look up at him placing your hand on his chest, “Spence, It’s okay. I want to help, please.”
He rests his hand on top yours and gives it a light squeeze, “Okay, but i’m not leaving you alone for a second.”
“I didn’t think you would.” you smile.
“Alright lovebirds, you can have your private time later, we should go now.” Derek teases.
Spencer groans, “See, this is why i didn’t say anything.”
“You think I’m bad? Wait till Penelope meets her.”
__
The three of you pile into the car before starting the drive to Spencer’s apartment so he could get you a change of clothes and other things you might need. You end up falling asleep in the back seat, the final stage of your shock sinking in like a rock. Spencer checks on you from the rear view mirror and sees you passed out, and smiles.
“She’s cute,” Derek starts, “Can I ask how long?”
“Nine months.” he replies, fishing for something out of his pocket.
“Pretty boy hid a girl from all of us for nine months? Maybe we’re not as good profilers as we thought.”
“Imagine that,” he laughs, and gestures to the item in his hand, “Look.”
Spencer’s holding out a well loved photo booth strip with three pictures, of you and Spencer from the time you went to a local county fair. You’re sitting in his lap, mostly due to the cramped space and the expansive limbs. The first picture is the two of you holding up finger guns attempting to be as back to back as you can. The second picture, you intended it to be a normal one where you both smile at the camera, but spencer couldn’t take his eyes off you and the picture captured the love struck gaze he had on you. The last one you were about to tell him the idea for it, when he grabbed your face and pulled you closer to kiss you, neither of you knowing when the final picture snapped.
The edges were worn out and frayed, clearly broken down by the oils on his fingers from pulling it out frequently. It was his most treasured item, a constant reminder of what was always waiting for him when he got back from grueling cases, and how lucky he was to have you in his life.
“You look really happy, kid.” Derek says, thinking about the many times he’s seen his friend at rock bottom, the things that have been so brutally taken from him, and the suffering he’s had at the hands of his job. His heart warms for his friend, who seemed to finally catch a break.
“I am.”
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