#and sure he got betrayed by his friend but he had SOOOO many friends and my only friend

[greenvertumna]

Had. A Moment.

jcs brainrot mindspace: fucked up that jesus was born just to die

the part of me that isn’t an idiot: …we’re all born to die you absolute fucking dork that’s how life works

[allpainnogain99]

Time to screech about Sonic Prime S3E1

Alrighty. Having taken a while to screech about the first episode to myself...now I’m gonna screech about it here LOL I’ve got a LOT I could say about it, soooo here goes. Enjoy my random musings and mostly just me reiterating what happened in the episode lmao

Starting off with Nine. He says that the Grim could have been everything Sonic ever wanted. He and Sonic have the tendency to talk past each other in a way, and they were both inadvertantly using each other. Neither is entirely in the right OR wrong here (which I will absolutely go into more depth about).

Gotta take a second to talk about the fortress Nine creates. I absolutely love the symbolism of it (well, what I’m choosing to take as symbolism, anyhoo). He could very easily have just created a simple lab for himself, like he used to have (and like Tails had), but he didn’t. He created a giant, elaborate fortress. Why? Well, for the obvious reason of “someone might come after me, I need protection”, but I like to think there’s more than that. It’s about power (this will also get brought up again). Nine is more than capable of protecting himself, which is how he has managed to survive for so long on his own. But now? It’s not just about protecting himself. It’s about showing that he can protect himself. It’s a physical manifestation of everything he has had to hold inside for his entire life. All of the mental strength he has, all for the world (or lack thereof, as the case may be) to see. He doesn’t have to hide anymore, and he wants everyone to know.

Then we switch over to the two hedgies, and oh boy is there a lot to talk about here.

It hurts seeing Sonic so lost and confused as to why Nine would have left, “betraying” him in the process. Seeing it from Sonic’s point of view, he doesn’t understand why Nine would want to leave behind what he believed would be the perfect chance to make everything right. Despite being told all the way back in season 1 that Nine wanted to start “our new life” over in the Grim, Sonic failed to see how much the idea of them staying together meant to Nine, as just the two of them. He doesn’t see how much he hurt Nine by not seeing him as his own person. No matter how much he tried to deny it, he was somewhat using Nine as a stand-in for Tails. Do I believe Sonic was being malicious and purposefully stringing Nine along? No. Of course not. That’s not in Sonic’s nature. He was just desperate to have his friends back, and failed to realize how much his words and actions were hurting Nine. Which of course is still wrong and something he needs to realize and understand.

And then there’s Shadow. While many people headcanoned that Shadow would just up and punch Sonic the moment he stepped foot inside the cave, I was pleasantly surprised that he did not. Granted, it was because their lives were literally on the line, but still. Shadow took one moment to say “I toldya so”, and left it at that, prioritizing their escape. He didn’t constantly berate Sonic as they were running, either. The insane amount of character growth that shows just makes me so happy.

And can we just talk about the escape scene? (both parts LOL but in due time). The way they both looked out for each other as they ran, and the fact that Shadow risked falling behind to make sure that Sonic made it to the ground safely??? I just...golly I can’t screech about that enough. (Also this brief frame of Shadow going from being on guard to being annoyed about Sonic’s rough landing is absolutely hilarious and it will live rent-free in my head...forever.)

The ghost scene. Shadow doesn’t berate Sonic for stopping, he’s calm and even tries to reach out to Sonic.

He understands how much it hurts Sonic to see the illusions, a major turnaround from how he acted in season 2 (granted, Shadow had more time to come to terms with the ghosts, seeing as how he had been in and out of Ghost Hill before, but I digress.). He does try to get Sonic to move on, but in the end gives him his chance to grieve and reflect, which Sonic has not had a chance to properly do this entire time. I love how caring Shadow is in this moment. (Also SEGA LET SHADOW SAY “OUR FRIENDS” YOU COWARDS! ROUGE IS SHADOW’S FRIEND, DAMNIT).

And Sonic. How he had gone from hopeful in season 2 that he could save them because he had all the shards, to now being emotionally scarred by the idea of not being able to fix it if they can’t get the shards back from Nine...and watching literal manifestations of specters of your friends being drawn into oblivion...damn it hurts. But I’m glad he was able to snap out of it enough to follow Shadow out.

Escape pt 2: Hedgie Boogaloo. These two are so in sync, they barely have to exchange any words at all, they know exactly what the other is going to be doing, and I love it. I mean, look at this.

Shadow reaching out his hand and Sonic instinctually grabbing it to pull each other forward? Hell yeah!!! And here, all it takes is one glance and they both had the same exact plan. I cannot get over how much I love seeing Sonic and Shadow work together like this.

Nine making his own Metal Sonic. This means soooo much. Nine feels like Sonic betrayed him, but he can’t bring himself to entirely give up the idea of having Sonic by his side. The solution? Create a robotic version, of course. But also, the tiny bit of malicious tone when Nine says “Hello...friend” just gave me the shivers, I love it.

“If there’s anything knowing you has taught me, it’s that there’s always another way”. This line made me screech out loud, I love it so much. Shadow being willing to admit that Sonic not only taught him something, but that Sonic taught him to think outside the box, that things could have more than one solution, that there’s no such thing as giving up. I was grinning like an idiot at this, because yay character development!!!

(ALSO fduoghdfoighdf my grumpy baby being annoyed I can’t oh my golly look how adorable gahhhhh)

ALSO THEY BOTH GET TO ENTER ANOTHER SHATTERSPACE TOGETHER WOOOHOOO!!!!

It was all about power (remember that earlier? XD). In a way, Shadow knows what Nine is feeling. Feeling like the entire world has betrayed you, and having the chance to get back at them? Sound familiar? Granted they went about it two different ways (Shadow trying to destroy everything vs Nine trying to literally create a new world, to an extent), but they both went off the deep end when offered a chance at an ultimate power. Neither one cared what was happening around them, all that mattered was that they got what they wanted. But of course Shadow won’t admit to seeing himself in Nine’s actions, instead opting to just be like “OK yeah this kid is a menace, gotta destroy him”. Do I wish Shadow would be more willing to give Nine a chance? Absolutely. Is he going to? Probably not, that’s more Sonic’s shtick.

Was Sonic in the wrong for wanting to get his friends back? Nope, not in the slightest. That’s what he wanted all along. He spent so long trying to do that, after all. Was he wrong in seeing Nine as a stand-in for Tails? Absolutely. Again, he may not see it that way, but both his actions and words make it clear that he at the very least had a hard time seeing Nine as his own person. Even now, with the words “this isn’t you, Nine”, shows that Sonic doesn’t truly know Nine, because yes, this is Nine. Has been from the very beginning. A broken, distrustful, lost child who just wants a home and safety, friends or no friends.

As for Nine? Was he wrong for wanting safety and a home? Of course not. Everybody deserves safety and a home. Is he wrong for not caring what happens to New Yoke? Ehh...thin ice there. Wrong for not caring what happens to any Shatterspace? Yeah, there the line is crossed. At least in Ghost Hill there wasn’t any living beings (sure, the ghosts/illusions were there, but keyword there is living), but what about the others? Nine could end up having the lives of entire universes on his hands, even his own if he’s not careful.

Grim Sonic. And the fight against Grim Sonic. Have I ever mentioned how much I love seeing these two work in sync? Just that one little nod, and off they both go. It’s such a treat to see, and I will never stop loving it.

(Also Nine just casually making a robotic copy of Birdie is hilarious to me. Like, “Yeah, I made copies of Sonic’s friends, but also the bird is cool, so I just copied her too ‘cause why not?”)

“At least I can trust them!”. Nine is willing to spend his entire life with just robots for friends, and why? Because he can program them however he wants, to be whoever he wants. Nine is eerily similar to the original Eggman in that regard. He’s done with dealing with people, because people are inferior and betray you. Robots can be reprogrammed if anything goes wrong (Sonic Heroes, anyone?). Part of me is curious to see just how close to Eggman that Nine will end up becoming.

Talking about rebuilding the prism. This whole scene. What takes literally the span of just a few seconds, says so much, without even using a single word. Sure, Nine said he would need one missing thing, but after that? It’s all spoken through body language. Nine looks down to Sonic’s hands and shoes. It’s subtle, but he’s trying to show Sonic what he means.

Of course, Sonic doesn’t figure it out, he doesn’t see where Nine is looking. but you know who does? That’s right. Shadow. His face says it all. He doesn’t even have to say “I know what you’re up to”, it’s entirely unspoken, and I love that.

And Nine? He responds in kind. Look at this.

It’s a challenge. “Oh, you think you have me figured out? Then try to stop me”. Again, no words need to be said. He’s calm, confident, smug even. He thinks he has Sonic and Shadow right where he wants them. He doesn’t see any way that they’ll win, and he, again, wants them to know it.

But he didn’t account for how ready Shadow is for war.

Being entirely willing to take on all the Grim robots in order to keep Sonic safe? Sure, it’s for the good of the entire universe, but also because as much as he doesn’t say it, he cares. I mean, listen to what he says as he’s carrying Sonic away. He doesn’t say “This is to save the universe” or “we’re all dead if he catches you”, he says “this is for your own good”. Someone who doesn’t care wouldn’t say that. He’s getting so much good characterization in just this one episode alone, and I hope it keeps up, even if he ends up being seen in small amounts (I swear if he only appears in the finale I will cry).

Aaaand yeah. That’s the end of the episode. I honestly can’t wait to see what happens when the rest of the season drops. I am soooo not ready for it to end, but I’m excited to see how it ends.

TL;DR I screeched like crazy about how much I love this episode LOL

[chaosfairy18]

Drinking with everyone was always an experience, mostly due to the fact that so many different characters met together to drink enough to have all their inhibitions fly out the window. Pie Eater was one of the few who had sworn to stay sober and make sure the others even found their way home - though some had already disappeared somewhere with one of the others or some stranger so he would only be worried if they didn't say anything until the next evening.

It was still nice, talking to the others, seeing Itey sleep peacefully on Snitch's shoulder after only some glasses, Jack flirting with David to hell and back and even Blink and Skittery almost starting fights with some idiots on the dance floor. Pie just stayed with the calmer ones, quietly talking to Snitch for the most part, but he did perk up when Snoddy sat on the next table over, hugging Jack and then David. "I love you guys soooo much, always s' nice ta get out."

They did something similar with Swifty, Dutchy and Mush, before almost tripping and sitting next to Snitch and Itey, very quietly proclaiming her love for her friends and patting Itey's hair. "S'rsly, I loooove all our fr'nds soooo much." They went to grab another cocktail from the table when Pie stopped them.

"Maybe that's enough, Snoddy."

She just pouted but let her hand fall. "Meanie."

Pie knew that wasn't meant seriously, but he did worry a bit about Snoddy's state, thinking he should really bring her home already. "Let's get you out of here and home, hm?" He pulled Snoddy up, making them giggle and throw their arms around his neck, almost falling on him.

Even with Snoddy being very affectionate, they made it out to the fresh air, both breathing it in a few times before moving again.

"Pie?", Snoddy started. "I really love you, you know?" They looked right into his eyes, grey eyes looking hazy still, but shining prettily in the lights of the streetlamps.

"I know. You told everyone else too."

That didn't seem to make her happy. "Bu' I need ya to knowwww. 's important." Snoddy always got so affectionate and happy when tipsy, but this really was especially much for her.

"I know. Love you too, Elle."

They smiled a bit but still pulled him closer. "M happy 'bout tha', but don' mean it like that. I really love you."

Pie stopped, looking at Snoddy's flushed face, freckles standing out even more like that. She couldn't mean... or did she?

In any case, that wasn't something to discuss tonight, that was something for when they were sober and could talk about this properly. "Let's talk about that tomorrow. My place?"

Snoddy smiled with their whole face. "Mhm! 'lways love your cakes. Wan' it for breakfast."

Pie Eater just hummed, opening the passanger side of his car and getting Snoddy in, surprised when they held onto his neck for a second longer and gave him a kiss on the cheek, just smiling before cuddling into her jacket.

Taking a few deep breaths, he got into his car, driving to his apartment, once patting Snoddy's hair when she held her head near the gear shift and looked at him pleadingly during a stop at a red light. All in all it was far too cute for his heart, but it wasn't like the worst was already over, he still had to convince Snoddy to sleep alone in the bed, knowing how much of a cuddler they were but not wanting to betray their trust while they hadn't talked about the maybe confession from before.

He only got it done by wrapping Snoddy up in two blankets in which they were too comfortable to move much and then sneaking out, lying on the couch and really wondering what was going to come of this tomorrow.

[enka-antix]

Soooo I know I should be making art for my own au but- but.. I have no excuses- but yeah this is a space pirate au by @bluiex and @wasted-by-someone

So I read through all the blog posts and the fic so far and I had a think- what if- now this doesn't need to happen but it has been existing in my brain so I'm putting it out there. So what if..

Later on as grian finishes the Canon, he leaves as promised he's allowed to leave. And he does, he returns to the academy and tells doc about the kidnapping thing tho he left out a lot of info.

Months go by and grian is back to his usual life tho it's going much better, one of his defense gadget ideas actually got made! It's being tested on actual ships! Heck the watchers of the academy even took notice of him, one of them even said how one day he might even be able to get himself promoted to be a watcher, something he wanted badly!

Yet he wasn't happy-

Especially when he got some news that shook him to his core.. his trap worked and scar was captured by the authorities. Doc told him this absolutely proud of his friend and all grian could do was force a smile.

That night he left a resignation on docs desk before silently leaving the academy wondering if he's making the right choice.

He knew he had to find the crew but where would they be, they have never been easy to track and his headache wasn't helping yet somehow he instinctively found them, how he wasn't sure.. his head was ringing but he ignored it. Of course when he got onto the ship a gun was the first thing pointed at him by pearl who looked like she felt hurt and betrayed, everyone looked conflicted and upset, maybe angry. Grian wasn't surprised, he knew mumbo would have found that that trap had been build by him after all they worked together for quite a while..

"Grian. What are you doing here? Haven't you done enough!?" Pearl sounded more betrayed than angry, she clearly wanted to be but she had started to see grian like a brother during his stay. Mumbo looked just as conflicted. Bdubs simply looked at him with hatred and a look of 'I told you so' as if he always knew that one say grian would be their enemy. Impulse looked calm but clearly not happy at all, he wasn't too close to grian but he liked the kid and enjoyed seeing how most the team seemed happy around him.

"..I'm sorry" grian didn't know what to say his vision felt blurry and he could barely think straight, the pain of his ringing head getting to him, he felt cold sweats as sounds began to distort- he noticed pearl rushing over and than everything went black.

By the time he woke up he felt much better tho he wondered why everything was so loud. Mumbo was the first to notice him wake up and he quickly went to check his condition asking if he was in pain.

"I'm fine but what happened?" Mumbo looked unsure how to answer, he looked like he hadn't slept for a while, many books laying around about vex magic, mumbo must have stayed by his side while he was unconscious. Finally mumbo decided to grab a mirror and simply show him and when grian looked in the mirror he quickly noticed the elf like ears "huh!? What the!?" As he freaked out some things like the books in the room began to slightly levitate and shake. "Why is this happening?!" He was concerned, why did his body change, why did stuff start moving along with his freak out???

"..because scar bound your souls together"

But yeah I've been thinking too much, not a great writer but ehhhhhhhh sorry for those waiting to hear about my au xD

[sailorhyunjinz]

Do you write yandere? If so, can I request skz yandere headcanons on how they would react when S/O rejects them because she doesn't wanna deal with whole drama that would come with dating an idol?

i mean kinda?? i have a seungmin yandere fic in my drafts sooo BUT YEAH

oh also, requests are not open but im just gonna do this one cause headcanons are kinda fun BUT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED <33

also why is the felix one so short-

Warnings; yandere!skz, rejection, k-dnapping, slight gaslightning or like manipulation, restraints, threats, aggression, mentions of masturbation, stockholm syndrome

Chan

nobody rejects him. nobody.

you two were friends from school and you were sooo happy when chan made it as an idol, finally persuing the dream he had been yapping on about for years. 

but in the midst of that he realized that he had feelings for you, he missed you all the time, just wanting to hang out with you and maybe explore the things he had on his mind. so,, he decided to confess when you guys were at a cafe.

“look y/n,,, there’s something I wanna tell you” he started to which you tilted your head

“nooo,,, are you guys going on a tour again,,, i wil miss you sooo much channie” you said with a pout but the boy shook his head.

“i like you y/n” 

your mouth stood agape, this was not what you expected and truthfully,,, not what you wanted. 

“chan,,, y-you know thats not possible” you said with a frown, looking at him straight ahead.

“of course it is,,, why wouldn’t it be? w-what are you trying to say y/n?!” his voice started growing louder, you looking around in order to see that people werent turning their heads towards your table. 

Minho

you have made a big big mistake my friend- 

wont even hesitate to keep you hostage in his basement LIKE IM NOT JOKING-

might just tie you up and like,,, not even do anything to you, just talk to you and admire you, maybe tracing your facial features and cuddle closer on the cold floor

just wants to keep you as a pet or smth and you are scared out of your mind cause you cant move cause of the restraints, you cant speak because you have silvertape across your lips that he only removes to feed you but if you start screaming you wont get any so you deicde to just stay calm and quiet before someone saves you and play along. 

i mean you do,,, kinda fall for him but you know you cant,, but you cant help but to fall for him and miss him whenever he’s out on schedule things

he always returns to you and you get so happy when you see the little crevice of light from outside when he opened the basement door

whenever he lies next to you, you put your head against his shoulder and take in his scent the best you can

he told you everyday that he would let you go if you agreed to date him but you shook your head,, maybe cause you liked being his prey. 

Changbin

he’s more of the threatening type of yandere,,, like,, not that he’s violent but if you try to block his number he will create new ones and keep on sending you messages about how you have betrayed him and how he wished that you loved him back and all that,,,,

you guys often meet because you go to the same college and are students in the same department sooo,,,, avoiding him is pretty impossible 

he stares a lot at you,,, you guys have a couple of classes together and he just stares the entire time, his eyes are just filled with revenge, he somehow wants you make you his, own you but he doesnt know how yet, for now he can just look.

watch this fucking message conversation just be this;

[why did you talk to him during class?]

[you could have just asked me]

[nobody loves you like i do. no one y/n]

you are never getting rid of him basically,,

he’s gonna get to you first ;))

Hyunjin

i feel like he goes more to the stalking route than the kidnapping and drugging and whatnot- 

ok,,, you rejected him,,, but that doesnt mean you’re getting rid of him.

ohmygod what if he turns into a peeping tom- cause he obviously knows where you live. 

like yall were not even that close?? he just saw you backstage at one of the concerts and thought you looked good so he decided to go up to, you werent an idol so no problem he thought.

but he gets a bit too,, hasty with his decisions and often falls for people randomly and so when he politely greeted you and gave you his number you simply shook your head, explaining that this wouldn’t be possible since you worked in the same industry and you needed to stay clear out of any scandals in order to keep your job. 

no was not answer in Hyunjins mind. 

luckily he managed to catch your full name by flickering through some papers in an office and also saw your full adress there, knowing exactly what he was going to do on his free time. 

Jisung

if im being completely honest,,, i have no idea-

like,,, he gives me kinda pervy yandere vibes,,,

what if youre like his ex before he became an idol and now he wants to get back together with you-

oh,,, he masturbates to your pictures-

i feel like he always thinks about you, wondering what you like and wants to write songs about you but he doesnt do much-

but when he finds out that you have been hired by the same company as him to work as a like,,, economics accountant thingy he is all of a sudden vEEERY interested-

always asking the manager of when the group will have meetings with the accounting team,,, although they had nothing to do with them-

he just wanted to be in a conference room with you (and think pervy things about you in your tight office skirt and white blouse)

you went to the toilet on day and you saw him lurking around the same floor,,, WHICH ONCE AGAIN WAS NOT CONNECTED TO THE GROUP AT ALL- 

and idk,,, probably sneaks in with you and locks the door before you even react that theres someone else in the toilet- 

i feel like he’s pretty mild,,, but when he’s alone with you he is aggressive broooo

probably pins you to the wall and threatens you or smth along those lines,,,,,

(writing this is what my life has become to-)

Felix

“what do you think you’re doing?”

you turn around again, you had just thought of just leaving with a vague answer to his question but he was not having it. 

“answer.” 

his words sounded cold, his dark voice making an entrace, the exact one you’ve heard on many of the songs you listened to.

“felix,,, you have to understand,,, u-um,, if we date theres gonna be some issues” you said but he just stared at you with cocky eyebrows and a dark gaze, running his tongue on the inside of his cheek.

“do you think i care? would i ask you if i cared?” he said to which you shook your head automatically, what more could you do?

“you get until tomorrow to think and if i don’t get the answer i want well,,, we’ll see what i’ll do to you.”

Seungmin

he plots shit behind your back yk?

he’s more of the sneaky type of yanderes (oop spoiler to a fic heh)

like he makes this like fucking year long plan where the objective of the mission is to make you obssessed with him-

he starts kinda subtely,,, first its going to the same gym as you and like,,, knowing where you placed your stuff

and then he starts putting small notes like under your waterbottle when you went to grab something that say like “i think youre cute, call me” and then his number

you obviously dont react,,, because why the fuck would you contact a stranger at the gym 

BUT THEN you realize that its him, its mf kim seungmin. yo,,,, u didnt know he went to this gym,,, that was not,,, the best-

of course you got a bit interested,,, you wanted to know how he was off camera,,, like just in his everyday life and i meeean,,, he was attractive but obviously you should stay away bc,,, he’s a celebrity but seungmin didnt want to stay away

he notes somehow started to get more aggressive,,, suddenly being like “why are you ignoring me?” and such,,,

and one night you were left alone in the gym with him,,, it was sooo quiet, only the sounds of your strained breaths as you lifted a dumbell

here where the plan came to play ;))

Jeongin

he’s obsessed with you and you are not going anywhere, even if you rejected him. 

he’s more clingy?? LIKE HE WILL NOT LEAVE YOU

ok sure,, he falls more into the stalking category too,,, 

also veeeery much a obssessed kinda yandere,,, like his mind is not thinking about how to like capture you,,, more about how to make you soooo comfortable and fool you into loving him despite the circumstances?

i just imagine that you work in a cafe and jeongin often meets you there when he buys coffee and you are already in awe when you see fucking yang jeongin enter the coffee shop on your shift but you were even more excited when he leaves his phone number on a napkin and slides it over the counter before leaving. 

you thought about it,,, contemplating multiple times but,,, you decided it would be best not to since well,,, safety purposes 

but he would visit you and every day his face got more and more perplexed cause he wondered why you didnt call

mf would not leave you alone, he would even wait outside the coffee shop until you finished your shift and walk you home,,, so now he knew where you lived- 

and then do the same thing over and over again until you talked to him.

does. not. give. up. 

[franeridart]

Anon said: i love love love LOVE how you just draw gojo leaning onto getou, hiding his face in getou's neck or back or chest <////3 im just so heartbroken over those two

So glad to hear you like him clingy as much as I do!! TT^TT as far as I’m concerned he wasn’t clingy enough in canon, so I’m fixing it as much as I can with every new doodle haha

Anon said: whenever im sad i just come to your account and look through your art :")) it brings me so much comfort :')) also i gotta mention that the teacher getou art you've made has healed my broken heart bc of jjk and now that is the only canon i accept thank you very much gege akutami has nothing on me

GAH GETO-SENSEI MY ONE AND ONLY I’m happy he makes you as soft as he does me, he’s such a comfort to me ;;;; and thank you for liking my stuff!!!! Means the world to me to hear it ;A; <3

Anon said: I miss your krbk sm 😔 No pressure intended!!!!!! I still love and support u and ur art!!!

Man I miss them too!!!!! @ hori when are you bringing my loves back from the war I’m here waiting good sir!!!

Anon said: v v curious on your thoughts on what’s currently going on in bnha manga :)))

HMMM what are my thoughts on it? Well, let’s split it in two: Deku’s side and Todoroki’s side, because that’s how it’s split in my brain atm, and allow me to start from the second because it’s easier to get through for me

I’m in love with everything Hori is doing with Todoroki and everyone involved with him - that’s to say his whole whole family and Hawks and Jeanist too, all of it, I’m so into it it’s no joke at all. Always been in love with how he handles Enji’s character and his interactions with his family and the latest developments didn’t disappoint me at all, wasn’t very much into Dabi right after the “reveal” but the more I think about it and about the story from his pov the more behind it I am, forever and always head over heels for Shouto’s way of dealing with a situation that’s as complex as one would expect from a protagonist of their very own story you could really make a manga out of the Todoroki’s family plot from Shouto’s pov alone, it’s incredible I can’t state how in love with it all I am enough. And Hawks, don’t make me start on him I’ll straight up never stop, absolutely and most definitely my favorite pro-hero I would trust him with my money and my kids 100/10 just assume I’m constantly crying over him. Also Jeanist is just hilarious so bless him and his presence in an otherwise too heavy story

Deku’s side........ well, the main problems I have with it are that one, I don’t really understant the need to keep ofa a secret from the class for the biggest part of the story when the reveal wasn’t forced upon Deku, didn’t have a huge impact on him or his relationship with the others (his leaving wasn’t directly caused by him coming clean after all, he wouldn’t have had to leave earlier had he not kept it a secret and he would have still left at this point had the class already known all along) and didn’t, like. Matter. All that much. Two, this manga is called my hero academia and I’m genuinely starting to wonder why. What was the point of all the arcs set inside the school anyway? Most of the characters growth (Deku’s especially) and the progression of the main plot happened in the arcs outside of the school anyway, and at this point it’s clear we’re not going back to the school after this or even seeing anyone graduate. What of Shinsou? What was the point of his plot when we’re not even gonna see him being active part of the class in a school environment? I’m just confused about it all, I guess. Three, which is really my biggest problem with it all, is the way Deku’s set on saving Shigaraki. It’s not like I don’t like a story in which all the villains are saved and the good guys win and love prevails and all that, call it corny but they’re exactly my type of stories, but I’m not sure I can get behind it when Twice died like that, and Midnight did as well, and Aizawa lost a leg, and Nighteye died, and Hawks might have lost his wings, and Shirakumo ended up Kurogiri and it’s still unclear whether he can be saved, like... why does Shigaraki get to be saved when so many people suffered like that? And it’s not only about them suffering by his hands, it’s about Hori and how he was ruthless with so many characters but lets the story show arbitrary kindness to Shigaraki alone, it’s all... well. Unfair. The way I see it. At this point I at the very least expect kindness for Touya as well, here.

That said if I pick the chapters one by one by themselves I do enjoy them very much. I just don’t gotta think about the big picture lmao AH but it’s all a personal opinion, of course! I know people who enjoy the way the story is going and I can see where they’re coming from, this is all arbitrary tastes and preferences on my part, I’m aware of it!

Anon said: Hi hi! I finally got into jjk AND finally caught up on the manga and i appreciate your doods soooo much more now!! They’re so great!! But imcurious, is there one specific moment in the story where you Gojo and Geto became IT for you? Just genuinely curious!!

THANK YOU happy to hear you liked jjk!!!! And that’s!!! a great question, I’m not sure I have an answer actually? I binged the manga in a day and a half, you see, and when I binge stuff that fast I rarely stop to overthink things - I did ship them as I read too since, well. They’re in love lmao but I shipped them in the same way I shipped itafushi or yuutoge after I read the prequel, you know? Just a general aknowledging of how good they were together. The main point with satosugu specifically was probably that satoru has been my favorite character since the beginning of the story and suguru got there as well as soon as I read their backstory, so once I was caught up they’re the ones I ended up spending the most time thinking about, both by themselves and together, and that ended up making me a bit obsessed..... just a bit lol

If I had to give one specific moment that got me by the heart and squeezed the hardest it’d be... probably Satoru’s “my soul knows otherwise”. And the way his voice alone could bring Suguru back, even for just a single moment. The thing about satosugu for me!!! one of the many things about them, but the main thing for me, is that they love each other. Be it platonic or however you wanna see it, they love each other. Despite everything and after it all, even if Satoru had to kill Suguru, even if Suguru killed so many and betrayed Satoru and they went their separate ways in the harshest of ways, they love each other. It’s insane, isn’t it? That they’d love each other so much they could pass over everything and anything. I’ve seen the “best friends become enemies” trope so often in shounen manga, but this is the first time I see it treated like this - with love so strong that they never blamed each other or turned that love in hate. The way satosugu do it is all-encompassing! It goes beyond the world and their differences and death itself! So if I had to pick it’d be that one, because that scene happens after it’s all over, and it all went to shit and way beyond too already, and still their souls resonate with each other and answer to each other and that sends me insane, just thinking about it. Like, god, they really still love each other. Satoru’s mourned for Suguru for a year, Suguru’s been dead for a year, they’d been separated ten whole years before then, and still! And still!!! It’s so tender I don’t know how to deal with it

Anon said: “What’s a god to a nonbeliever?”—That tag is going to haunt me for a while. The entire tag section for your latest Gojo and Geto drawing is meta-worthy.

THANK YOU it’d been eating at my brain I had to write it down somewhere why are those two like that

Anon said: Do you take commissions? No pressure! ✨❤️

Not right now!

Anon said: How do you feel about sukuna ? like/dislike or thoughts on him

AMAZING QUESTION I love him. I have absolutely zero clue as of why so don’t ask me to elaborate, I’m literally that marge pic with the potato when it’s about Sukuna, I have no meta thoughts about him nor deep reasonings behind it - by all accounts, I should dislike him! But he shows up and I’m like nghhh king, so that’s where we stand. It’s Sukuna, you know. I just think he’s neat.

Anon said: sighs time to get into another fandom bc i simp too hard for ur art 😔

HAH thank you for the trust I hope you’ll like ror if you do get into it!!! hahaha

[moldisgoodforyou]

lost time ch. 5.5

soooo it’s not the next part of study abroad fic like i promised but i wanted this one out of the drafts. pls enjoy 

wordcount: 3.6k

warnings: all smut - this is part of chapter five and then a what if they actually fucked lmao

_____

They kept kissing for a while, Sophie lazily toying with the ends of his hair. After a couple minutes, he started kissing along her jaw, sucking just enough at a spot on her neck to elicit a soft moan from her. “I wish I came as your date.” He murmured against her skin as he traced his thumb back and forth over her hip. She froze at his confession, her head clouded without a clear thought. “You’re drunk.” She mumbled back, hand falling from his neck. “I’m not.” He argued, kissing her again. She could taste the rum on his lips, betraying his words.

“Well, I am.” She replied softly, hesitating again until he went in for another kiss. “And I’m still mad about your stupid death cup rule.” He scoffed, softly, but sounded more amused than anything. “You can’t call house rules when it’s not your house.” Sophie scowled and pressed her hand a little harder against his chest. “It’s more my house than yours. Can’t you just follow the rules?” He chuckled, trailing his hand higher and ran his index finger lightly along her spine. “Do you ever stop arguing, Soph?” She shivered at his touch, willing herself not to move closer. “Not with you.”

“Can we…?” He asked with a broad grin, tipping his head toward their houses, just a short walk away.

She paused, considering. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” He challenged, stepping closer and backing her up against the wall. She swallowed and felt her heart threatening to beat out of her chest, then willed herself not to think about it any longer - if she did, she’d back herself out of it. “I just. We’re - we’re not going to -” She stammered, and he raised his eyebrows. “Yes or no?”

“Yes.” She decided, pushing him a little so she could slip out from under him and walk off the back porch, then around the house. He snorted as he followed her. “Walking through the house isn’t an option for you?”

“Not really a fan of everyone thinking we hooked up.” She lied, striding down the sidewalk determinedly.

He furrowed his brow and jogged to catch up with her, confused. “I thought you said -”

“I did. We’re going to.”

“Then why -”

“It doesn’t matter, god, do you always ask so many questions?” She snapped frustratedly, hating herself as she did. She was better than this, wasn’t she? Being mean to Rafe had always been a coping mechanism to hide the inkling of a crush she’d had on him all those years.

He fell silent, frowning as he followed. Maybe this was a bad idea, right? Some small part of his brain reminded him of the one time he saw a therapist in training, as a favor to a friend also in the psychology major, and the therapist had told him he sounded like he was a little too comfortable allowing people in who repeatedly hurt him. All that after only thirty minutes of meeting the person and a few confessions. Probably bullshit, he always figured, it was just because he was in a vulnerable spot right after he was dumped by Brooklyn and shared a little too much.

They got to his house faster than he expected, and he offered his hand as they walked through the door. He was surprised when she accepted it, a little tentatively, and hoped she couldn’t feel his pulse through his palm. “My room’s just up here.”

“Okay. I like the house, it’s cool.” A lot of their flirty energy had died down and turned to nervous energy, and she wished she’d wiped her palm on her skirt before taking his hand.

“It was built in 1932 or something like that, it actually used to be the governor’s mansion -” He started, only to be interrupted by her. “I know. I had to do a research project on it once, I have the blueprints.”

“Oh.” He showed her into his room, thankful that he’d cleaned up earlier that day, and dropped her hand as he shut the door behind her. “So. Here it is.”

“Rafe?” She took a step closer, trapping him against the door like he’d had her earlier. Had he always had that little smattering of freckles across his nose? They were so faint by now she could hardly see it, but for a moment she wondered what they’d look like in summer, across his tanned skin.

“Yeah?” His hands found her waist easily and he dared to tease his thumb along the elastic of her skirt, nearly making her shudder.

“I didn’t really come here to talk.”

“Right.” He glanced between her eyes and her lips, tongue darting out briefly to wet his own.

She seemed amused, raising her eyebrows. “Am I always gonna have to make the first move?”

He shook his head quickly and leaned down, and she wasn’t sure who kissed who first. Their lips met hard in a heated kiss and it wasn’t long until he reached down and tapped one hand under her thigh. She took the hint and jumped to wrap her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, rolling her hips a little into him.

He supported her with both hands under her thighs and groaned into her mouth as she rolled her hips. Her already-short skirt was halfway up her waist already so there was nearly nothing between them, especially considering his half-unbuttoned shirt and tight pants that left nothing to the imagination.

“Bed.” She breathed out, working at the rest of the buttons down his shirt. He nodded and gently dropped her down onto the bed, then looked up at her with a curious glance as he went to tug off her halter top. “Can I?”

“Yeah, here let me.” She nodded, sitting up just enough to wrestle off the top. He bit hard on his tongue as her breasts came loose, then reached out and cupped them, running his thumbs over her nipples and smirked. “You need to stop hiding these under those big hoodies you wear to class.”

“Oh, sorry, I’ll start just having my tits out in class.” She rolled her eyes, shoving his shirt off his shoulders. “Totally reasonable.”

He laughed and pushed her up the bed, pressing kisses down her throat and along her collarbone. “Sounds perfect to me.” She moaned when he hit the perfect spot at the base of her neck, leaving a red mark sure to bruise. “Rafe.”

He paused for a moment and had to will himself not to cum in his pants just at that sound alone. “Hm?”

“Do you really have to leave hickeys like we’re fifteen?” She threaded her fingers in his hair, wanting to touch nearly every inch of his skin. If she was going to do this once - and she swore she wouldn’t do it again - she was going to make it count.

“Do you not like them?” As if to prove a point, he sucked another one at the swell of her breast, then skated his teeth along her nipple as he moved further down. Her grip tightened in his hair and she let her head fall back, gasping. “Just - fuck - just not where anyone can see.”

“I can do that.” He affirmed, taking his time to leave little kisses and marks all over her chest. She grit her teeth when it went on a little too long, shifting around below him. “Cameron - you can -”

“Yeah?” He lifted his head and moved up to kiss her again but she whined in protest, pressing his head back down. “Come on.”

“Where do you want me?”

“Rafe.”

“I need words, Soph.”

She scowled, not wanting to admit it any way that she was enjoying herself. “You’re just trying to hold something over me.”

He smirked, thoroughly amused. “I’m trying to fuck you, actually, if you’ll let me.”

“Do you always take this long?” She reached for the zipper of his pants in between them and he laughed, pushing her hand away. “Are you this annoying with every man you sleep with?”

“It’s not like I’ll come that way anyways.” She mumbled under her breath and he paused, cocking his head a little. Sophie hated that she wanted to comb her fingers through his beautiful floppy hair.

“You’ve never come from someone touching you?” He asked, a little softer, gentler with his touch. She huffed and shook her head, not wanting to add that she’d hardly come from sex anyways. “No. Now can we just -”

“No, no, I’m going to take my time.” He declared, moving down her body and nipped along her hips, the waistband of her skirt, then slowly unbuttoned her skirt and looked up at her. “Okay?”

“Okay.” She breathed out, embarrassed at how much control he had over her.

He carefully slid her skirt down her legs and let it fall to the ground, then nudged her legs open, positioning himself in between them.

“What are you - oh, fuck.” She cursed as he placed an open-mouthed kiss directly on her clothed clit. He smirked against her and pushed her legs a little wider, then kissed along her inner thighs, peppering kisses along the hem of her panties.

“Can I?” He asked, hooking his fingers in the sides of her thong. She nodded quickly and he pulled it down - just a little bit - then took it in both hands, ripped it clean in half and stuffed it in his back pocket.

“Did you just -” She sat up a little, trying to close her legs, but he nudged them back open, giving her a wolfish grin. “Yeah, I wanted a souvenir.”

“Oh my fucking god.” Sophie laughed a little in disbelief, but it quickly turned into a moan as he licked a wide stripe up her center, wasting no time. He grinned and replaced his tongue with his fingers, first one then two, as he glanced up at her. “Soaked just for me?”

“In your dreams.” She bit back and he shook his head with a grin. Only she could keep up an argument during sex. “You’re in them more often than you’d think, sweetheart.”

As much as she wanted to hate sweetheart, it felt like a knot was forming in her stomach just from the nickname alone. All she could manage in response was just “oh?”

He smirked and continued his ministrations, slow pumps in and out combined with flicks of his tongue over her clit, slowly building up to it. She whined a little, biting her lip. “More.”

“Yeah? You like that, Soph?” Rafe glanced up to gauge her expression and nearly laughed when he saw her head dropped back against the pillows and her hands fisted in the sheets. He just picked up his pace instead, moving to suck on her clit. When he did that, and curled his fingers inside of her, she gasped sharply. “Do that again.”

He used his free hand to push her leg out again, as they were close to clamping around his head, and continued until she was gasping again, her legs starting to shake. “Oh my god - fucking hell, Rafe -”

Rafe took a mental picture and swore he’d never forget how goddamn pretty she looked as she came, calling out his name. It was quite literally a dream come true and he worked her through the orgasm, then climbed back up the bed to rest next to her and give her a moment to recover.

She tipped her head over, looking almost...surprised. “I didn’t think I could - I’ve never -”

He smirked. “Told you I’d take my time.”

“Arrogant asshole.” She bit back, but it didn’t really have the same effect when she was still a little out of breath and had a blissful expression. Sophie glanced down and saw him straining against his pants, and briefly reconsidered - if she just got up and left right then, would Rafe hate her for all of eternity for giving him blue balls?

Then he rolled on top of her, and she felt him against her core for a tiny moment, and decided she could at least go for a handjob if she couldn’t handle the whole thing. He deserved that at the very least, for the way he just made her feel. Also, why had no one in her social circles ever commented on the size of him before, even in high school? He had to be at least six, maybe seven -

“Soph.” Rafe placed a quick kiss on her lips, laughing when she was jerked out of her reverie and blinked up at him.

“Yes?”

“Are you okay?”

She nodded quickly, giving him a small smile. “Are you?”

“I have condoms....” he trailed off, raising his eyebrows with the insinuation. She gave him a small nod and pushed him over onto his back, straddling him and started to work at his button fly.

He let out a choked breath of surprise, just staring at her for a moment.

She felt his gaze and glanced up at him as she undid the last button, placing her hand over his length. “What?”

He swallowed, hard. “I think you might have to yank my pants off. They’re a little tight around the ass.”

Sophie giggled and got off of him so he could swing his legs off to the side of the bed, trying to tug down what he could. She joined in after a moment when they got stuck around his thighs, yanking until she heard a solid rip and immediately put her hands up, eyes wide. “Shit, I didn’t mean to -”

“It’s fine, I’ll just buy another pair.” He excused right away and she bristled, hearing arrogance seep into his tone. That was the reminder she needed that he wasn’t just a hot random hookup, this was Rafe, and even if he could make her cum in five damn minutes from a flick of his tongue and twist of his fingers, he was still everything she hated about him too.

“Where are your condoms?” She reached for his bedside table and he grabbed her hand to stop her, not wanting her to see the drafted screenplay he’d been working on for a class. It featured two sworn enemies, who’d known each other for ages then ended up at the same college even though it was far away from their hometown - fine, there were too many similarities that she’d catch right away. He kicked off what was now three big scraps of his pants and reached in the very back of the drawer to pull out a condom, a sore reminder of how long it’d been.

She sat back on the bed and tried to look impassive at his size, reminding herself she really should have assumed, with the way he was built and all of 6’3”. He caught her staring and smirked, keeping his eyes locked with hers as he rolled the condom on. “You okay?”

She blushed, immediately flustered. “I’m fine.”

“When was the last time you...?”

She huffed, crossing her arms. “Is that really important?”

He shook his head quickly, genuine. “No! No, not at all, but we can just take things slower. If you want.”

She appreciated the gesture - he was probably right - but grabbed his hand anyways, pulling him down to the bed. “I’ll be fine.”

He leaned over her, giving her a long kiss and combed his fingers through her hair. Just that action alone had her wanting to melt into him and kiss him for ages, until their lips fell off - she had to remind herself that this wasn’t a romantic thing with how soft he was being. He nearly reached to hold her hand, then just ran it up her side instead, telling himself that she wouldn’t want that, anyways.

“Rafe.” She murmured against his lips, feeling overwhelmed from the way his hands were everywhere and how he was so damn close and god, were his eyes always that pretty?

He pulled back a little, concerned. “Did I do something wr -”

She didn’t give him the chance to finish. Sophie pushed him onto his back, straddling him and rocked her hips once against him. “You’re taking too long.”

He groaned, his hands immediately going to her waist to support her. “Didn’t realize we were on a time crunch.”

“I wouldn’t be doing this if I was sober.” She reminded him and he frowned, squeezing her hips gently. “You’re not drunk though. I didn’t think you were even tipsy by now.”

“I ...” She trailed off, feeling a little guilty at the way he froze. “I wouldn’t have agreed to this normally.” She wasn’t sure why, exactly, she was lying to him, just felt the need to put him in his place, remind him what they’d be going back to after this one-night stand.

His brow knitted with concern. “We can stop, Sophie, I’m not going to push you to do anything you don’t want to.”

“No, no, I didn’t mean it like that.” She amended quickly, feeling way too exposed for a moment to be having that conversation. “I just meant - I don’t know. This isn’t happening again, so. Enjoy it while you last.”

He relaxed a little, his frown turning to a smirk. “While I last? I think it only took me five minutes to watch you cum.”

She had no response to that, so she just huffed, standing up on her knees. “Are you good?”

He nodded, watching with bated breath as she took his cock and lined it up with her entrance, slowly sinking down onto him. He groaned, letting his head fall back for a moment, but kept his grip on her hips. “Fuck, Sophie.”

Just him saying her name - like that - sent a pulse straight to her core. She bit the inside of her cheek hard as she sunk down all the way on him, waiting just a moment for it to turn from a flash of pain to pleasure. “Just - just let me -”

He nodded, rubbing circles on her hips with his thumbs. “Take your time.”

She scowled, almost taking it as a challenge. “I’m fine.” She started bouncing her hips on him, leaning forward a little and bracing her hands on his abs. It took her a moment, but it started feeling better and better, and Rafe’s groans and gasps were enough to spur her on.

“Oh, c’mon...so good, Soph...” He encouraged, bringing his hips up to meet hers. For a few minutes the room was just filled with their breathy pants and the sound of skin on skin. When he felt himself getting closer, he reached in between them and started rubbing circles across her clit, loving the way she gasped at his touch.

She nearly flinched, the feeling of everything being so close to overwhelming. She was so close to reaching her high - again - and kept her eyes on his for a heated moment. 

Rafe kept up his motions until he could tell she was close, about to snap, and he was too. “There we go, Soph, that’s my good girl -” 

“Not yours.” She snapped hastily and he let his head flop back against the pillow, frustrated, and dropped his hand. “Didn’t mean it like that -” 

She shook her head. “Whatever. Doesn’t matter.” Sophie grabbed his hand and brought it back to her clit, hoping to spur him on again. “Please don’t stop - oh, yes, fuck, there -” 

He resumed his gentle rubbing, a little more frenzied now, and groaned as she moved her hips a little differently, rolling them and bouncing on him somehow all at the same time. It only took a minute longer for her to come and as she clenched around him, it spurred him on too, making him let out an embarrassingly loud groan. 

As they both caught their breath and she climbed off him, panting, he shot her a cocky grin. “Sure you don’t want to do that again?” 

She chose to ignore him and stood, hoping it didn’t show how she stumbled just a little from weak legs. She reached for her skirt then paused, standing up with crossed arms. “You took my underwear.” 

“I did.” He nodded, leaning back with his hands behind his head, on full display. 

Sophie let her gaze rake over him for a second, but he didn’t notice as he was doing the same. “And you ripped it.” 

He had the decency to look a little bashful at that. “Probably shouldn’t have.” 

“What the hell am I supposed to do?” 

Rafe gave her a wry smile. “You could stay the night and I’ll give you my boxers to sleep in.” 

She huffed and pulled her skirt on anyways, rolling her eyes. “Give it up, Cameron. Never gonna happen.” 

“I’m sorry, did you just disassociate from the last half hour?” He raised his eyebrows, smirking. 

Sophie wrestled on her halter top, thoroughly annoyed by now - god, only he could switch her mood so easily. “Worst sex of my life.” 

He let out a loud, barking laugh. “You know that’s not true.” 

“I - well - whatever. I’m leaving.” She started toward the door and he sprung out of bed, tugging on a pair of boxers. “No, hold on, I’m not letting you walk home alone.” 

She stopped in the doorframe, crossing her arms. “This is ridiculous, we’re not dating -” 

“It’s still three am and I’m not letting you walk.” He shoved his feet into boat shoes and grabbed his keys from his nightstand. “Come on.” 

“Just a drive home?” She asked, stepping aside so she could follow him down the hall. 

“Just a drive home.” He confirmed. “Jesus, Sophie, it’s just a kind gesture, not a committed relationship.” 

“I know, just. I don’t know.” 

He cast a glance back at her, frowning a little. “Your last boyfriend was that bad, huh?” 

She rolled her eyes, following him outside to the car and got in (after he insisted upon opening the door for her). “No comment.” 

taglist: @whoeveniskendall @kkmaybank @karsinner @outerbanksbro @outerbankspreferences @randomficsandshit @jailcalledlife @tovvaa @moniamaybank @illbesafeforyou @dontjinx-it @freddymaybank @jjmaybankzz @g4bster @oopsiedoopsie23 @babygal-babygal @thecuthoney

[spine-buster]

The President Wears Prada (William Nylander) | Chapter 34

A/N: Soooo this is the penultimate chapter.  This feels very bittersweet to post because we all know how the series turned out.  Anyway, other stuff happens to, but the series...🥺

August 8th, 2020

Aberdeen Bloom was thinking about last night.  Again.

And she shouldn’t be.  She was having breakfast with the team for God’s sake.  Everyone was eating pancakes or waffles or avocado toast and she was fantasizing about William fucking her raw from behind and watching him through the mirror.  She could swear she still felt his slick and hard cock inside of her.  She could swear she still felt him pounding her from behind and grabbing on to her mouth to silence her and—

“Aberdeen.”

—her whimpering and trying to be quiet and the same time—

“Aberdeen.”

—and his low, guttural grunts as he fucked her and made her be quiet and—

“Aberdeen!”

She snapped out of it.  She looked to her right to see Jason looking at her like she was crazy.  “Your phone is ringing,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world – because it was.  The thing was blaring out for God knows how long and she was just sitting there.

She grabbed it, not bothering to look at the number, and brought it to her ear.  “Hello?”

“So what did the boys get up to last night?”  Alec Young’s voice asked from the other end.  

That brought her back down to earth.  She got up out of her seat and made her way towards the doorway, where it would be much quieter.  “What did they get up to?” she feigned ignorance.

“You can’t tell me that after a win like that all they did was go to bed,” he said in a tone of voice that made Aberdeen want to punch him through the phone.  She couldn’t believe he was the one responsible for editing her piece, that it was him who was a deciding factor on whether or not she got a job with the magazine.  “Did they sneak girls into the hotel?  Prostitutes?  Did they get one for Matthews for scoring the overtime winner?”

Aberdeen sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.  William Nylander fucked the president’s assistant.  They’ve been carrying on a secret affair for the better part of a year now and nobody has a fucking clue.  They were so desperate for each other that they broke every bubble guideline so he could fuck her raw in her bathroom as she bent over the marble vanity.  How’s that for a scoop?  “With all due respect, Alec…”

“Aberdeen, come on.”

“I’m trying to take the more balanced approach, the more human side, the—”

“There’s gotta be something!”

She sighed again.  She knew he was more or less her editor and all, and her job depended on him, but she was on her last nerve.  “You want something?  Okay, here’s something.  Two days ago Courtney Muzzin and her daughter Luna stood outside of the Royal York Hotel with a giant sign on Bristol board that said ‘We love you, Dada’ and aimed it directly at Jake’s window,” she said, the edge very evident in her voice.  “I can’t lie, Alec.  I can’t just make up stories about drugs and prostitutes and whatever else you think is going on here.  They can fucking sue me.”

“Aberdeen, we need a story.  If you don’t give us the story, you’re not working at Toronto Life.  That’s it,” he said, hanging up.  

Aberdeen felt her chest tighten.  She couldn’t do it.  She couldn’t go back on her morals.  She couldn’t just…betray her friends.  Her family.  Her work family, but her family nonetheless.  She had to stay resolute.  She was going to get this job, and she was going to get it whether Alec approved of her story or not.  She was going to get it whether Alec wanted her there or not.  She was going to get it whether he liked her writing or not.  She was going to prove him wrong.  She was going to do it on her own terms, with her own talent.  She was going to bank on herself.

When she got back to her seat, Jason was still eating his breakfast.  She picked up her fork and ate a piece of watermelon before moving on to her yogurt parfait.  “Who was that?” he asked.

She shook her head slightly, signaling that she didn’t want to talk about it.  But when Jason continued looking at her, she knew he wasn’t going to let it pass.  “The guy that’s responsible for editing that article I’m submitting to Toronto Life,” she said.

“What did he want?” Jason asked.

She sighed.  “He wants a story filled with booze and drugs and women, because he’s convinced so many of you are still like that,” she began.  “He thought we would have ordered a stripper or something for Auston last night for scoring his overtime goal.  He doesn’t think Courtney and Luna Muzzin standing outside with a sign about loving daddy is going to sell magazines.”

Jason nodded his head in understanding.  He’d been around hockey for such a long time – he understood completely where Alec got his mentality from.  “And you refuse to write that.”

“It’s not just that I refuse to write it.  I can’t write it.  None of it would be true.  Imagine me writing about you guys with hookers and blow?  I’d get sued!”

Jason chuckled.  “And he doesn’t get that?  How’s this guy an editor for a prominent city magazine?”

“Beats the shit out of me,” Aberdeen shrugged, fiddling around with her spoon.  “But…that’s my issue.  I’ll figure it out.  I’ll write something that will blow his mind and make him wonder why he ever thought he wanted me to write about hookers and blow in the first place.”

Jason smiled.  “Atta girl.”

Jason continued to eat as Aberdeen continued to fiddle with her spoon.  She looked across the room briefly to see William chowing down on some avocado and a piece of toast.  He was scrolling through his phone and, periodically, would look at something Pierre would show him one-third of space away at the table.  Less than ten hours ago his body was pressed up against hers.  Now they were separated by a sea of tables and hockey players.  

“Can I ask you a question?” she asked Jason suddenly.

“Anything,” he didn’t even look at her when he answered.

She hesitated for a second.  “If…I mean…if things don’t go the way we want them to go tomorrow…” she began.

“You mean if we lose,” he interrupted, finally staring her dead in the eye.  “You can say the words Aberdeen.  It’s okay.”

“If we lose tomorrow…I…what should I do?  Like, how should I act?  What should I say?  I don’t want to make you guys even more upset by saying the wrong thing.”

“I doubt you can make anyone on this team upset—”

“Jason.”

He sighed.  He set down his flatware and brought his hands together.  “I think being there physically is good,” he began.  “Like, just being a presence.  Telling the guys you’re there if they want to talk.  Don’t bring it up unless we do.  Some guys are more open.  Others bottle it inside and never want to talk about it.  You have to figure out who’s who in that sense.”

“I just want to be a good…support.  I don’t want to be that person that seems apathetic because I don’t care about hockey as much as you guys.  I know how important this is for all of you.  I know how hard you guys are working to get it done.  I just want to make sure everybody, like…knows that, you know?”

“They know, Aberdeen,” Jason said confidently.  “And I’m not just saying that.  Trust me.  They know.”

***

“How many words do you have now?” William asked through the FaceTime call.  They were lying in bed together.  Virtually.  As always, he was less than 50 feet away in his own bed.  Aberdeen felt cold without his touch, now that she had felt it in the bubble.  It took every ounce of strength and willpower within her not to sneak into his room and beg him to fuck her again.

“I’m at five thousand right now,” she answered.  “I got a call from Alec today.  He’s such a dick.”

“It sucks that you’ll have to work under him.  I mean, if he’s even your editor at the magazine.  He might work in a different department or whatever.”

Aberdeen shuddered at the thought.  Him becoming her boss would be a nightmare.  Beth Zadakis – who Aberdeen originally met with – would be the much better choice in her eyes.  “Here’s hoping he is in another department,” she bit her lip.  “But enough about me, Willy.  How are you feeling about tomorrow?”

“I don’t know…” he said, giving his own shrug.  “I’m not nervous or anything.  I just…I know what I need to do.  I know what we need to do.  We just gotta do it.”

“D’you remember what I told you before we got in here?  That I’ll love you whatever happens?” she asked.  William nodded his head.  “That still stands.  Whatever happens tomorrow, I love you.”

William nodded his head gingerly.  “If we lose…” he began softly, “it’s gotta be, like, a media blackout for at least a week.  Until they make us do those exit interviews or whatever.”

“Deal,” Aberdeen nodded.

“It’s gonna be bad if we lose, Aberdeen,” he warned her.  “You’ve never experienced it before because you don’t watch or whatever, but they’ll be saying a whole bunch of shit—”

“—I won’t listen to any of it—”

“—No, Aberdeen, listen,” he cautioned, his tone of voice more serious.  “They’ll be saying a whole bunch of shit about me.  I didn’t produce, I didn’t perform, I should get traded, blah blah blah.  Same shit, different day.  I’m always the scapegoat.  I just…I know how emotional you got when you read up on everything near my birthday.  I just don’t want you getting upset.  I’ll never forgive them anyways, like in general, but I’ll really never forgive them if they make you cry again.”

“I won’t, Willy.  I don’t – you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I just want to protect you, minskatt.”

“I know you do,” she smiled softly.  “But none of that matters.  All that matters is that I love you.”

“I love you too.”

***

August 9th, 2020

In the end, it wasn’t shitty play.  It wasn’t a patented Leafs Meltdown™.  It wasn’t that they weren’t trying.  It wasn’t even anything bad.

It was just a hot goalie.

That was the most Aberdeen could have asked for, she guessed.  She didn’t really know, because at this point, she was devoid of emotion.  Everything in her was just…empty.  She couldn’t feel a thing.  That was, until, the camera showed a close up of the bench, and she saw Jason hunched over, his head down.  

That was when the tears started.  She couldn’t care less about Kasperi beside him.  It was Jason that she cared about.  Here he was, near the end of his career, signed with his hometown team for league minimum trying to chase his dream of winning a Stanley Cup with the team he grew up watching.  And now, in this wonky season of benched home openers and valued leadership to a stopped and re-started season due to a global pandemic, everything around him came crashing down.  Having to leave his family, his wife, his four daughters, all to chase the dream, all for it to disappear.

“Stop crying,” Brendan said from beside her.  She couldn’t discern his voice.  He wasn’t giving a command.  He wasn’t mad.  He wasn’t angry.  But it was obvious that he wasn’t happy.  He barely blinked as he looked down at the ice, hands shoved in his pockets.

Aberdeen wiped her tears quickly with the back of her hand.  “Sorry,” she said meekly, knowing she was offering absolutely nothing.  

When the buzzer rang and the teams lined up to shake hands, she made her way out of the box, waiting for Brendan and Kyle to follow.  But they didn’t.  She waited and waited and waited but they weren’t coming.  She peeked back into the room and watched as they stood still, looking down at the ice until the last of the team made their way through the tunnel.  Aberdeen realized then that they were staying because the camera was on them.  Of course it was.  The media was going to squeeze every emotion out of the boys until they were shells of themselves.  She bet two of them were being forced into media interviews right now, barely out of their hockey gear.

When they finally made their way down to the locker room, it was eerily quiet.  That’s the first thing Aberdeen noticed – the lack of noise.  It was so different from just two nights ago when they were all screaming and hugging her.  When she walked in behind Brendan and Kyle, and finally saw their faces, she immediately looked for William’s.  He looked so defeated.  So broken.  For a guy who was very apathetic in front of the camera, making it looked like nothing phased him, he was definitely showing his emotion now.  Her breath hitched in her throat as more tears threatened to spill.  After William, she looked for Jason – then she really had to stop the sob.  

She didn’t know if Sheldon had already given his post-game speech.  She was almost sure he did, because Kyle and Brendan took so long, and because she absolutely knew he wouldn’t end the night with what he ended up saying, the only thing she heard him say.  “Pack your bags tonight.  We’re leaving tomorrow morning.”

They’d been through a hell of a season.  A wonky start.  A shitty coach.  A coaching change.  A loss to their own Zamboni driver.  A fucking worldwide pandemic.  A bubble.  The media was never on their side.  And—

“Go to the media room, see how the conversations are going,” Brendan said, his voice low.  “Send Morgan and John out as soon as possible, then make sure the media know about their future availability.  We have to speak to the team.”

She furrowed her brows at him.  Why would he banish her from the locker room so he could talk to the team?  “What are you gonna say?”

“What’s it to you?”

He heart froze.  So he was angry.  And he was taking it out on her.  “Fine,” she huffed.  “I thought we were a team, but I guess not.”

***

Nobody ate when they got back to the hotel.  There was no point.  Everybody just disappeared back into their rooms, probably to pack, probably to wallow in their own self-pity for the night until they had to leave tomorrow and face the world, probably to just lie in bed and stare at the ceiling for hours.  Aberdeen knew that’s what she would be doing.

Well, after she got to the bottom of one thing.

“What did Brendan and Kyle say to you guys?” she asked William on the phone.

“I can’t tell you.”

She furrowed her brows – not like he could see her.  “What?  You can’t tell me?”

“I can’t tell you,” he repeated.  “It stays between us.  In the locker room.”

“I…you’re being serious.”

“Of course I am.  It’s…I can’t tell you.”

Aberdeen knew she wasn’t going to get it out of him.  She’d have to give up.  Not that she wanted to.  “Well, I love you.  I’ll always love you,” she said instead, changing the subject.  “I’m sorry things didn’t go the way we all wanted them to.”

“I am too.  This fucking sucks.”

Suddenly, there was a knock at her door.  She rose up immediately from her bed.  “Please tell me that’s not you,” she said.  “We’re leaving tomorrow morning.”

“What’s not me?” William asked, confused.

Aberdeen stopped.  She took her phone off her ear.  “Who is it?” she asked out loud.

“It’s me,” she heard Brendan’s voice from the hallway.

She threw her phone dramatically across the room and onto her bed.  She threw it so violently it almost hit the wall.  “Let me get my mask!” she called out, grabbing one from the dresser before hooking it onto her ears.  She took a deep breath before she opened the door.  When she did, Brendan walked straight into her room.  She was shocked.  “You’re coming into my hotel room?”

“Oh fuck it, we’re leaving tomorrow morning,” he mumbled, waving off her concern.  The door shut behind her as she walked into her own room gingerly, watching Brendan pace back and forth.  He stopped when he noticed her.  “I want to apologize for what I said to you today after the game,” he said.  “It was out of line.”

“Thank you,” she said.

“There are just some things that need to be said to the team only Aberdeen.  Meaning the players.  You’re part of the team but it’s—it’s—”

“Don’t worry.  I get it.”

Brendan stopped, taking a deep breath to steady himself.  “For my entire life I’ve wanted this team to be successful.  My entire life.  I was born two years after their last Stanley Cup win.  And growing up, I adored this team.  And when I was a player – it didn’t matter that I was a Red Wing.  I love them, too, but in a different way.  Not the way I love the Toronto Maple Leafs.  And when I was given the opportunity to be the president, I made sure I would never take it for granted.  And I made sure – I made a promise to myself – that I would be the one to see this team to victory.  And every time that we don’t get to that victory, I break that promise,” he said.  Aberdeen understood completely.  “None of…this is about you, of course.  This is about the team.  This is about promises that we make to each other.  Promises that we make to ourselves.  Promises we make to get better, to succeed, to climb that mountain and get to the promised land.  This is about the integrity of our character.  The pride we have in this hockey club, to put on that Maple Leaf every night.”

Aberdeen stayed silent.  Brendan was bearing his soul to her.  Every word he was saying was impassioned and coming directly from his heart.  She didn’t want to speak, because there was nothing she could say.  She watched as he took a few steps forward and put his hands on her shoulders.  “You’re part of this team, Aberdeen.  I think you always will be to these boys.  You were the soul of this team this year.”

She shook her head.  “I don’t believe that.”

“I do,” he said confidently.  “I know so.”

“How do you know?”

“Because their soul is hurt right now, but it hasn’t died,” he said.  “It’s still there.  They still have it in them.  Just like you have it in you.”

***

August 10th, 2020

Aberdeen stood absent-mindedly off to the side, the bus being loaded with the team’s bags.  Some of the boys had already gotten on the bus.  She should have gotten on too, but her feet were planted firmly in place for some reason.  

Fifteen days in the bubble.  And now it was all over.

“Hey Aberdeen?” she heard Auston’s voice from behind her.  She spun around to face him.  “I’m sorry we couldn’t do it for you.  Like, for your story.”

***

Kasha came to pick up Aberdeen.  She brought Minerva in her carrier, who kept meowing at the sight of Aberdeen.  Aberdeen took her out and cuddled her against her chest, giving her tons of kisses.  

She watched Tyson do the same to Ralph, wondering if he’d still be on the team next year.

***

When she and Kasha got back into her apartment, Aberdeen went straight to her bed.  She plopped down dramatically and only moved when she felt Kasha standing in the doorway.  “D’you want to go out?  You finally have some freedom,” Kasha suggested.  “We can go for tacos, for brunch…”

Aberdeen perched herself up on her elbows.  “Do you think I’m the soul of someone?  Or something?”

Kasha looked at her strangely, but answered the question nonetheless.  “I definitely think you have the capacity to be for someone.  You know I believe in the concept of soulmates.  Why do you ask?”

“For who?”

Kasha shrugged, but a small smile appeared on her face.  “For William.”

“Why William?”

“Because from the few times I’ve seen you to interact together – like last year, and then at the Halloween party – he looks at you like you already are his soul.”

***

“You should come over for lunch one of these days,” Jason said to her on the phone.  “Jen would love to have you over.  I’m sure the girls would love to see you too.”

Aberdeen smiled into the phone.  Jason Spezza was deflecting.  This was not part of their original conversation.  “When you’re okay, maybe I will.”

“I’m always okay,” he defended.

“You’re not right now,” she said definitively.  There was no beating around the bush.  “But you will be.  At your own pace.  And when you’re good to go, I’ll come over.  And you better cook and let me and Jen sip margaritas in the backyard.”

Jason laughed his infamous laugh.  “Deal.”

***

August 11th, 2020

“Media blackout?” Aberdeen asked William on the phone.

William nodded his head on the FaceTime call.  “Media blackout.”

“I’ll come over tomorrow when Kasha’s back at the office,” she said.  “We can cuddle.”

“That’s all I want to do right now, to be honest.”

***

August 12th, 2020

With Kasha going into the office, Aberdeen was able to sneak away to William’s.  He let her in easily, without much fanfare, and he enveloped her in a hug and brought her down with him on the couch as they lay their together, every limb wrapped around the other.  Aberdeen was running her fingers through William’s hair soothingly as his head lay on her chest.  Hockey was still on in the background.  Alex was still playing, and William wanted to support him.  Aberdeen already knew he’d be calling his brother after the game.  

“I love you so much,” she whispered out of nowhere.  She just felt the need to say it.

William looked up at her.  “I love you too.”

“That last night at the hotel, Brendan told me I was the soul of the team this year,” she said.  His comments were still on her mind.  “Do you think that’s true?”

William nodded his head.  “I do.  I think you’re my soul, too.”

***

The kisses were slow at first.  Needy.  William needed her.  He needed to be comforted.  His brother wasn’t around to talk to, and it was the middle of the night in Sweden so he couldn’t call his parents, although Aberdeen was sure they would have picked up the phone if they saw it was William calling in the middle of the night.  So until he could speak to his brother and his parents, Aberdeen would be there for him, kissing him as they lay facing each other side-by-side on his couch.  There to console him.  There to comfort him.

They kissed for a long time.  Such a long time.  It told Aberdeen that William needed that intimate physical contact, not just flat-out sex, and that he was savouring his time with her as much as she was with him.  But who was she kidding?  He always did.  He always savoured his time with her.  It didn’t matter where, or when, or how, or how much they’d lied to the people around them to get some alone time.  By the end of it she was sure her lips here swollen and red, and when she opened her eyes to look at his, his were too.  So puffy.  So soft.  In their glory.

She felt his hand dip beneath the hem of her pants and grab the flesh of her ass to squeeze it.  She hooked a leg over his torso and could feel his growing erection graze her thigh.  She shivered at the feeling, digging her nails into his bicep.  

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled against her lips.

“Sorry for what?”

“Sorry we couldn’t do it for you and your story.  I won’t forgive myself if you don’t get that job,” he revealed.

“Shhhhh…” she cooed, cupping his face and kissing him.  “What did I tell you before we got into the bubble, hmm?  I love you no matter what happens in there.  I love you Willy.  I always have and always will.”

“I love you too, minskatt.  I need you.  Do you need me?”

Aberdeen’s heart fluttered at his question.  She nodded her head automatically and gave him a quick kiss.  “I need you.  I’ll always need you.”

With their pants and underwear pushed down their legs, William slipped himself into her slowly, watching the look on her face change and hearing the long sigh escape her mouth.  This is what he loved most about their physical relationship.  They could do anything and it would feel like the best time every time.  They could have regular sex.  They could explore a new position.  They could have rough, passionate sex like that night in the bubble.  They could have close, intimate sex like right now.  Each time was incredible.  Each time he loved more than the last.

Each time, William realized how much he needed Aberdeen, and how much Aberdeen needed him.  They needed each other.

“You feel so good, Willy,” Aberdeen’s voice brought him back down to earth.  The pure euphoria in her voice was music to his ears.  “I need you, Willy.  I need you.”

He moved his hips to thrust into her, and so did she.  Their bodies moved together as they always did, and the pleasure they experienced together was paramount to absolutely anything and everything.  

After they both came together, William squeezed his arms around Aberdeen and pressed her against his body even closer than they were before.  He nestled his face into the crook of her neck, dragging his lips along her skin until he got to her ear.  “I need you more than anything,” he whispered.  “You’re my entire life.  You’re my entire soul.”

She believed him.

***

August 25th, 2020

Aberdeen was with Camden when the news broke.  She was spending the day at her parent’s house because Camden had admitted he missed her, so Aberdeen decided to spend the day.  They played video games.  They watched Brooklyn 9-9.  They went on a bike ride around the neighbourhood with masks on and stopped at a local shop to grab some smoothies.  It was perfect sibling bonding time while Siena slaved away in their bedroom studying God knows what for God knows which course come September.  

“Did you see the news?!” Camden asked as he emerged from the smoothie shop with both their smoothies.

“See what?” Aberdeen asked, thinking the worst.  

“Kasperi was traded!” he announced as he handed her the mango smoothie she requested.  

“What?!” she shrieked, grabbing her phone out of her back pocket.  She hadn’t looked at it since they went on the bike ride about an hour ago, because she wanted to spend actual quality time with her brother.  Now, she saw that she missed the alert from the Leafs app on her phone, and a slew of texts from Willy.

“Yeah.  He got traded to Pittsburgh—”

kappy just called me he got traded to pittsburgh just got told r u around? can i come see u? ok so ur not at ur place… ur not at Scotiabank r u?

“—for a first-round pick.”

“A first?!” she shrieked again.  She was shocked.  Shocked.  She didn’t know how Kyle was able to finesse a first-round pick for Kasperi fucking Kapanen.  Her mind was in three places at once as she thought about the trade, her brother standing in front of her, and William’s texts.  For all his faults and questionable judgement in girlfriends, Kasperi was one of William’s best friends.  She knew it would hurt William to see him leave.  That’s probably why he was trying to find her.

I’m at my parents hanging with Cam today.  He missed me.

i know

You know?????

“Cam, I think we should head home,” she said, hopping back onto her bike.

Camden’s eyes lit up.  “Why?  Do you think Brendan Shanahan will want to call you?”

He was so cute.  To think she was important enough that Brendan Shanahan would call her about a trade.  She let him think so.  “He might…” she said, opening the Leafs app on her phone.  “Let’s just go.  You lead the way.”

It wasn’t the smartest choice, but as they biked through their neighbourhood back to their house, Aberdeen read the statement on her phone.  PRESS RELEASE -- -- -- The Toronto Maple Leafs announced today that the hockey club has completed a trade with the Pittsburgh Penguins, acquiring the Penguins' first round selection in the 2020 NHL Draft (15th overall), forward Evan Rodrigues, forward Filip Hallander and defenceman David Warsofsky in exchange for forward Kasperi Kapanen, forward Pontus Aberg and defenceman Jesper Lindgren.

So Pontus was leaving too.  Another Swede.  Aberdeen wondered if William had a strong opinion on him leaving as well, but she doubted it.  She thought about what was going through William’s head as she and Cam continued their bike ride home, but as they turned on their street and they got closer to their house, she noticed a car parked on the street.  A very familiar looking car.

“Oh Jesus fucking Christ…” she mumbled to herself.  

“Whose car is that?” Camden asked, speeding up.  “Don’t people know they’re not allowed over houses anymore?!”

Aberdeen mentally prepared herself as she and Camden walked through their front door.  And that’s when Aberdeen saw him: William sitting on her couch with her mom, mask dangling from his wrist as he held a mug of tea.  “There you two are,” her mom smiled.  

“WILLIAM!” Camden screamed as he kicked off his shoes.

“Hey buddy,” William smiled as he watched Camden’s face light up.  He watched as Camden readied himself to run over to him for a hug but then stopped himself.  It made William sad, knowing Camden couldn’t do what he wanted to do.  “How are you?”

“I’m good!  I’m – do I have to get my mask? – are you staying for dinner – are you going back to Sweden? – are you—”

“Whoa whoa whoa, slow down young man,” Orla smiled at her son.  “I don’t think you’ll be needing your mask.  And yes William will be staying for dinner—”

“—YES!—”

“And no, I’m not going back to Sweden.  I don’t want to have to quarantine again.  I’m done with quarantining,” William added.

“Me too!” Camden said, exasperated, as he plopped himself down on the couch next to him, sipping dramatically on his smoothie.  “I haven’t seen anybody besides these guys since March!”

***

Aberdeen was sure William was a near-perfect human being when it came to interacting with Cam.  That afternoon saw them playing street hockey and video games, with Aberdeen even leaving them alone together while she helped her mom make dinner.  When Mirza came home from work and saw William, his face lit up.  Even Siena was happy to see him, despite her stress from studying. 

Maybe this would make it easier for when she had to tell everyone that they were dating…eventually.

William promised to drive Aberdeen home, which meant Orla and Mirza could escape into their room to sleep and not worry.  They gave Cam special permission to stay up well over an hour passed his bed time.  It was only when Aberdeen told Cam that he needed to get ready for bed that she and William had their first moments of alone time the entire day he spent at the house.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t talk about the trade.  I know you’re probably feeling like shit right now seeing your best friends being shipped off.  Are you okay?” she asked as they lay on opposite ends of the couch.  

“Much better now,” he said, his voice soft.  “I love your family.  They make everything better.”

She smiled.  “I think Cam just has so much energy and asks so many questions that it takes your mind off of it,” she giggled slightly.

“That’s part of it, but it’s more than that,” he said.  “It’s your mom’s cooking and your dad’s smile and Siena’s, like, stares.  It’s Cam being so cute.  It’s this house and the vibe, like at Christmas.  It’s everything.”

Aberdeen couldn’t keep the smile off her face.  “For what it’s worth, they love you too.”

“Do you think we’ll have a family like this?”

Aberdeen would have frozen if she was uncomfortable with the line of questioning and what William was insinuating.  But she didn’t, because she wasn’t.  She nodded her head before reaching between their bodies to tickle his fingers with her own in a small, unnoticeable sign of intimacy.  “I do,” she said softly.

“I love you, Aberdeen.”

“I love you too, Willy.”

“Aberdeen?” Cam’s voice suddenly rang out as he walked back into the living room with his pajamas on.

Their hands separated quickly.  “What is it, Cam?” she asked.

“I saw your name all over hockey Twitter.”

Both Aberdeen and William shot up.  “What do you mean?” William asked.

“What the hell are you doing on hockey Twitter, Camden?” Aberdeen asked sternly.  “You’re twelve.”

“Joey at school has an account and he shares it with me!” he said, as if that would make Aberdeen calm.  It just fuelled her anger and made her want to punch a twelve year old boy named Joey.  “It was because Saylor Greene talked about you.  Who’s Saylor Greene?  Does she work with you?” Camden asked.

Aberdeen’s heart fell into the pit of her stomach.  William jolted off the couch and typed something into his phone as he walked outside.  “Give me your phone,” she held her hand out at her brother.

“But Aberdeen—” he watched William leave to go outside.

“I said give me your phone now,” she repeated.  

Camden handed it over.  She began to scroll through the screen to see the tweets he saw, and read what he’d just read.

@leafsbabe34: saylor greene is having a meltdown on her twitter about the leafs. she’s a psycho

@coolcoolcool: good luck to kasperi Kapanen and his psycho girlfriend in pittsburgh.  Pens PR never ever puts up with this type of bullshit so it will be interesting to see what happens to her.  Good riddance.

@amandaaalove44: she brought so much drama to Toronto…bye bye saylor!

Okay…innocent enough.  Aberdeen still didn’t like Camden reading all of this but she didn’t see any mention of her name.  How the hell was she being dragged into this?  She scrolled some more, reading much of the same tweets, and then she saw it.

Aberdeen’s stomach was in knots as she read all the tweets, all the insinuations, and all the outright accusations.  Saylor was naming her without naming her.  Any hardcore fan would probably know who she was talking about.  Hockey twitter would definitely know thanks to the Blueprint birthday video.  She felt sick.  She felt sick as she saw Saylor’s replies to everyone’s tweets, calling them out and being downright rude to people she didn’t even know.  She was sick as she saw fans commenting on the situation and bringing her name up because they knew it was her.  

“Aberdeen?” Camden’s voice was soft, confused, as he watched his sister furrowing her brows at his phone screen.  She looked at him.  “I’m sorry I was on hockey Twitter.”

“You have to promise me to never go on there again,” she said.  “I mean it Cam.”

He nodded his head.  “I was just trying to see what they were saying about William.”

She inhaled.  “Now you really can’t go on there again.  Not until you’re thirty.”

“Sixteen.”

“Deal.  Now come here,” she extended her arms.  

Camden went in for a hug.  “Where’d William go?”

“Don’t worry about it,” she said.  “Let me hug you in silence because you’re gonna become a teenager one day and you won’t let me do this anymore.”

Her phone buzzed from beside her.  Brendan’s name flashed atop of a text message.  I’m taking care of it.  And as she continued to hug Cam, she could hear William’s voice vaguely from outside on the deck.  “This is twice now with a girl you’ve dated.  TWICE!!!!!”

***

August 26th, 2020

“How many words do you have left?” William asked as he massaged Aberdeen’s shoulders.

“I’m just editing,” she said, reaching her hand over and placing it on one of his.  “I’ll be done within the hour.  I promise.”

William bent down to give her a quick kiss.  “You got this.”

***

To: Alec Young [young@torontolife.com] Cc: Beth Zadakis [zadakis@torontolife.com] Bcc: From: Aberdeen Bloom [aberdeenbloom@gmail.com] 23:15     08/25/2020

Hello Alec and Beth,

As requested, here is my 10,000-word report on the NHL Bubble experience.  Please note that I have also included photos to accompany the text.  I have received express approval from those in the photos that they can be used for this article.  If you would like me to send proof of permission, please let me know.

I hope you enjoy my work and choose it for publication in Toronto Life.  I understand that the article may, perhaps, be a departure from what was expected.  However, I believe the work speaks for itself.

Best, Aberdeen Bloom

***

August 27th, 2020

“So what happens now?” William asked.

“We wait,” Aberdeen said, her breath shaky.

[needdatbag]

Drinking You/II

Notes: Soooo....Here’s part 2..Thanx for the notes guyssss <3 ♥

Summary: You encounter a stranger on your way back from the grocery shop and everything about him pulls you in.

Pairings: Eren Yeager x Reader; Various pairings eventually

Warnings: NSFW(not today tho); mentions of smoking. 

>

Part II

’’Kid….Am I not interesting enough for your small, forgetful brain?’’ asked Levi from his desk, his grey eyes expressing the dissatisfaction he had about your mistake.

THE FILE. The Eren Yeager file. The file he stole from your bag after he finished...well...screwing you. To say that you were upset about the fact that you were used as a mere excuse for theft was an understatement. You were pissed as hell.

But your boss came first, as his death glare made you snap out of your one sided grudge with the memory of the charming terrorist you encountered. It was definitely wrong and probably a bad move but you couldn’t tell Levi what happened. So….you lied.

’’For the 27th time, I am so sorry that I ‘accidentally’ threw an important file into the shredder..I was cleaning my desk and I wasn’t paying attention.’’ you sounded honest but a little mechanical as you said the same excuse for awhile now.

Levi raised one of his brows at your nonchalance but sighed and said:

’’At least you didn't lose it. That would have been a big ass problem.’’

You clenched your fist behind your back. This was not ending well for you.

’’Please..I’m not that idiotic.’’ somehow your tone didn’t betray you but a small voice in your mind retorted immediately, ‘You are more than idiotic and you’re definetley screwed.’. You gulped.

A soft knock interrupted the beginning of your inner mental breakdown. Armin entered Levi’s office carrying a stack of files in one arm and holding what looked like a coffee cup in the other. He placed the files on Levi’s desk and handed him the cup. You suddenly blurted out your first thought.

’’But you don’t drink coffee.’’

Levi’s death glare almost made you take a step back. Well, maybe Eren Yeager took more than the file...he stole your brain too as you suddenly find yourself incapable of thinking. You want to slap a hand over your mouth. What the hell was wrong with you lately?

Armin watched you curiously for a moment. You feared his intuition, he was too sharp sometimes and that made you anxious in the current situation, but you tried to play it off anyway.

’’Ahem, yes, I heard it from Mrs. Zoe? Ha, am I wrong ?’’ you laughed awkwardly at the end of your sentence.

Armin shook his head, his short blonde hair hitting his face in the process. ’’That is right. As expected of you, Y/N, your mind always picks up the smallest details. The Captain drinks tea. I got a few extra cups to go, just 10 minutes ago. You can help yourself from the kitchen...Though I’m pretty sure you love coffee more.’’ he said while giving you a kind, small smile. You smiled back trying not to break eye contact.

‘You might be my best friend’s soulmate.’

You cringed internally. Not because you didn't find Armin attractive, because you thought the boy could even model if he wanted to, but because of what happened later after Eren said that phrase. You shook your head trying to banish the image of a long haired, 6ft man on top of your naked body. ‘Not the time, not the time.’

You wondered what Armin would think about the fact that you got to meet his best friend before he did. As you found out today, turns out they have not met in more than a year. You felt guilty for keeping your mouth shut. But it seemed like the best course of action. You needed to act solo for a while.

In a safe way, of course.

Levi motioned for Armin to leave but as he got closer to the door you saw his eyes discreetly peering at your neck and then at your face. Your hair was covering most of your hickeys but Armin might have noticed something anyway.

Once he left the room, Levi got up from his seat and approached the window.

He was wearing a plain white dress shirt and black pants with a pair of dark brown leather shoes. He was not going on the field today, you could tell that much because of his outfit. He was in his thirties now but his looks still caused many casualties between the female officers, especially the MPs who were more than enthusiastic when Levi passed them by. He was one of the best at his job and his handsome face was obviously a bonus.

You always said it was the mix between his good looks and his cold attitude that was pulling people in, but he was far from an unfeeling person. He usually cared too much about everything. Seeming distant was just his way of preserving himself. People were impressed just by hearing stories about him. But most of them had no idea how much he suffered. You knew. Not that he liked that. He never liked the fact that fate seemed to always make you meet again and again.

The first time, as his student when he was teaching in highschool. The second time as his blind date, Hange’s courtesy. The third time as the new member of his team, fate’s courtesy this time.

Each time you look at him you remember how selfish you’ve always been. You hate the thought but you know and can’t deny the fact that one way or another you always became a burden for the man sitting right across you. Right from the start.

----------------------------------------------------------------------- ’’Sir, is she worth it?’’ an eighteen years old you asked a younger Levi who was just exiting through the school’s gates. As he whipped his head back to match the voice to the person, his stern look softened just a bit. It was late and you were supposed to be home long ago. Instead you were only leaving now, a bag full of books in your right hand. You always stayed in the library until the school closed. You didn’t want to go home anyway.

’’That’s not an ideal question to ask about your sister, is it, brat?’’

You started laughing. He knew better than to refer to his fiance as your sister. You hated the bitch and there was no bond whatsoever between the two of you. She was just the awful daughter of the amazing woman who took you in after your parents kicked you out.

’’Can you give me a ride home, sir? I am afraid my frail arms are unable to carry these books until I reach the nearest bus stop.’’ you said in a dramatic tone while Levi just massaged his temples out of frustration but made a gesture towards his car anyway.

You smiled at him as you entered the car. He was driving in silence, without any radio music in the background, without any small talk. You wanted to tell him so many things, you wanted to express your indignation regarding the fact that your ‘sister’ was cheating on him and using him as an alibi so her mother won’t ever suspect she’s dating one of the biggest drug dealers in the region, you wanted to complain about the fact that he wasted his good heart on someone who wronged him before, you wanted to ask him why was he clinging to unhappiness so desperately. You could never understand. Even as you watched as the road light travelled on his face while he drove, you could only think about how well he managed to hide his pain. People didn’t notice that he was alone most of the time. Or that he rarely smiled.

It made you sad, it made you think of a part of yourself. Except you constantly fought for your right at happiness even if sadness never left your side. No matter how annoying that made you, you still kept going. But he didn’t even seem like he tried. He looked like the loneliest person on earth and he hid it so well that if you said what you thought out loud, people would just think you're looking into it too much.

You reached your house and his car stopped. Somehow, only now you noticed the pleasant smell inside the car. It smelled like fruity tea-bags which you assumed came from a spare ’stash’ he had somewhere around. You smiled. He always drinks tea during the breaks. It makes him look so refined too. Without any intention you giggled. He noticed and raised a brow, asking:

’’What makes you so happy that you’re hesitating to get out of my car? Hm? Move it, you didn’t even had dinner yet.’’

You turned your whole body towards him while you spoke in an excited manner.

’’I was thinking about you, sir. The way you enjoy your tea during breaks and how that’s the most happy I saw you since I came to this school.’’

With a confused look on his face he tilted his head but let you speak nonetheless. Your voice became softer while you looked down, your hair falling over your face.

’’You see, I believe that happiness can only come from being honest with yourself. Lie to the world, lie to people but if you lie to yourself you’ll just tint your soul to the point even the tea you love so much won’t taste the same anymore.’’

Levi’s eyes widened slightly. He knew you were outspoken and that sometimes you caused trouble because you meddled in things that were none of your business and you spoke way too much but he couldn’t deny the way you arranged your words. He knew you had a kind heart and that you were trying to reach his. He almost wanted to smile. ‘Stupid kid.’

He didn't say anything as you exited the car but watched you until you entered the house. You were right, he knew he was cheated on, he knew he was used but there was another side to his truth too. He used the idea of a fiance to run away from both his past and future.

But looking at you who had nothing but wanted everything, he thought that maybe, just maybe...he became a coward. And he always hated cowards.

As you watched him drive away, that was the last time you met him as a teacher, as he would lose his job in two weeks due to murder acusations regarding his fiance. Your ‘sister’.

You’d hear from your classmates how a tall, blonde detective cuffed him in front of the whole school while he put up a fight.

Then he would be gone and you wouldn't hear anything about him for a few years. -------------------------------------------------

’’So, care to explain why you are so distracted today?’’ he was gazing outside the window but you couldn’t help notice the way his voice was softer now that you were alone again.

’’I was unable to rest well last night, however you don’t need to worry, sir. I’ll snap back as soon as I drink some coffee, just as Armin suggested.’’

Another lie. You actually slept like a baby because you were so exhausted. The bed felt so warm and the man next to you smelt so good that you felt like you were floating. Only your dumb ass could sleep so relaxed next to a criminal.

You pondered before asking the next question.

’’What type of person used to be.....Eren Yeager?’’

His name sounded so different from your mouth or maybe that was your own perception. You recognised a little stinginess in your tone.

You pulled out your phone and started a voice recording. You were allowed to do so when it came to declarations. You were a profiler afterall. You needed to go over conversations and details, multiple times to complete your work.

Levi turned away from the window and took a few steps closer to you. His expression looked indifferent but you knew better. There was regret mixed in his feelings.

’’That brat wasn’t the most talented nor the smartest agent around, I actually often thought he was more of an idiot than most people I knew..’’

You stopped yourself from laughing. ’Unprofessional...Don’t do it. Let him continue.’

’’He was too much of a hot head for his own good but he listened to my orders and tried to look at things from a more mature perspective, perhaps we might have asked too much from him. Our department was in trouble and we lost more people than you could count, in a very short amount of time. We had an operation that lasted for more than 2 years. Eren was the key to that operation. Everything circled around him. We wanted to find answers so badly, we sacrificed so much that we never saw the fact that we had spies among us and the whole operation became more than a national issue. You said you read the file before you shredded it, right? I also mentioned it in the meeting before. You know what’s the issue I’m talking about, right?’’

Your breathing becomes more alert and a bitter feeling takes over your heart. Memories from your distant childhood try to resurface but you push them away. The past always catches up.

Your voice becomes more serious when you answer.

’’After 14 years of peace we might have another war with the neighbour nation, Marley, is that right?’’

Silence fills the room as Levi only nods. He seems lost in his own mind for a while and you can only guess what he might be thinking about. He was a soldier back then and this whole deal pissed him off.

’’Eren betrayed us. No warning, just a vague explanation. He almost wiped out their whole capital, one of the biggest cities in Marley, he killed VERY important people and now we are threatened left and right. This dumbass is very close to starting the biggest international conflict this country ever faced. Can’t believe that brat had the nerve to come back and now he’s under our jurisdiction again. We have to catch him and fast. Everyone you’ll ask will say he changed, but I always knew he had it in him. He might just destroy the world...no one can cage him. He’s that type of monster.’’

Your body suddenly felt numb, a weird sense of fear trying to take over you. His face, his expressions, everything flashed in your mind repeatedly, pieces of the conversation you had, the way he touched you, the note he left. For the first time in a very long time, you felt lost in translation.

Things were not adding up. Someone was wrong here. Something was definitely missing. You paused the recording and exhaled while rubbing your temples.

’’This should not be handled by a departament full of people that know him. Someone must really want to bury the Survey unit in shit.’’

A humourless laugh escaped your mouth.

’’Sorry Levi, you always hated when I cursed. Forgot about that.’’  you said, a sad look plastered on your face remembering many of the arguments you two had mostly because of you.

He frowned and took another step closer to you, unconsciously wanting to pat your head but you were already heading for the door. He snapped out of it and looked at his hand. He got carried away for a second, wanting to comfort you.

’’I guess you’ll always have a soft spot for me, sir...but we shouldn’t be very comfortable around each other. You were always the better man and I was always the wicked little girl.’’

’’L/N..’’

You exited his office. ‘Unfortunately, I’m still the same.’ you thought while walking to your desk and getting ready to work on the details of some cases that became piled up in the last week.

As you sat down and flipped through various lists of criminals, you tried to silence your mind. Sometimes your mental state was just like a furious sea storm. You have the tendency to drown in your own dark and poisonous thoughts until your identity becomes foggy. But work was a great distraction and thankfully...you sure had plenty of it. So you rolled up your sleeves, took a sip of the coffee Armin put on your desk (somehow the fact that he did sweet gestures like this made you very warm inside) and started working on your reports ignoring intentionally a certain criminal whose face you really didn’t wanna see again today, not on a screen, not printed...you'll deal with the Yeager case at home. You had to catch up on your work anyway.

Right? You weren’t running away or anything...right?

People around you became colorful shadows that moved around exiting or entering the headquarters while you were scribbling furiously details about different cases. When your phone rang, an hour before the end of your shift, you almost jumped out of your chair. You looked around and realised everyone was out and you were the only one left. Probably investigating, or some kind of emergency.

On the screen of your phone Jean’s face was popping up with the incoming call. When he first gave you his contact number he took a selfie of himself because he thought he looked ‘cool’ in that moment and you ‘had to have his handsomeness on your phone’, his words not yours. You rolled your eyes at the memory.

’’ ‘Sup Kirschtein? I’m busy and I swear to God if you call me ‘cause you're bored while being on some stakeout I will…’’ He burst into laughter and answered: ’’Calm down Y/N, I only did that like five or six times and you might’ve even liked it, don’t lie to me now.’’ he said in a charming yet joking voice and you couldn’t help but smile. He was one of the people who could easily put you in a good mood. ’’Wanna get out to get some ‘’fresh air’’ on the roof? It turns out we sorted out what we had to do sooner than expected….well sooner than I thought. That damn Floch will kill me one day...His attitude might just get us both killed.’’

Of course he wanted to smoke and complain about his partner, Floch. Jean didn’t seem like the type to think a lot, especially when you first got to meet him. He’s loud, a little bit of a bragger and has lots of opinions on anything but he was an exceptionally capable man in times of crises. You witnessed that a few times but you also heard it from Sasha: ’’Marco, Jean’s ex-partner, always said that Jean was the one most capable of leading us out of trouble and Marco’s intuition about people was as good as my instincts about danger. He knew what he was saying.’’

When you reached the roof, Jean was already smoking while looking at the red sky. The sun was almost gone. He looked lost in thought, barely noticing you until he heard the sound of your lighter. You took a long puff and exhaled. For some reason you felt exhausted and even if the silence somehow pleased you, it felt unlike Jean. He always liked to talk a lot around you, your smoking breaks being full of gossiping. It was almost always the two of you, given the fact that you and him were the only smokers in the department. You had a hunch that Armin smoked too but only when he was truly bothered by something, Connie tried it once and said he liked it but you knew he lied, Sasha said she didn't like the taste(did not surprise you at all there) and Mikasa thought it was stupid and unhealthy and you honestly agreed.

’’Why do you smoke, Jean?’’ you asked out of the blue. You realised you never asked him that. For some reason the image of Eren staring at you while holding his pack of cigarettes in one hand flashed in your mind. You took another inhale of smoke trying to push the image away. Jean didn’t respond immediately but when his eyes fixed on the cigarette he was holding.

’’Marco used to smoke here. It was so unlike him. He really didn’t seem like the type and he tried to hide it all the time...he was even carrying perfume around.’’ he said and let out a short bitter laugh. For some reason he placed a hand on his face trying to hide his expression. ’’I started smoking after he died. I guess..well fuck...I miss being with my friend. When I’m holding this cigarette it feels as if he’s still here. As if I could …’’ he hesitated before continuing,’’....ask him for advice about what I should do..’’

You got closer to him and bumped your shoulder into his in a friendly manner. He dropped his hand from his face and looked at you. You could see he was emotionally drained but you flashed him a cheerful smile even though you felt like shit as well. You looked up at the now, darker sky and said in a loud voice:

’’By smoking this cigarette I dare ask the amazing Marco Bott from heaven to lend me some of his wisdom. Please let me give our friend here a good answer to the question troubling his, not so young anymore, soul.’’

’’I’m only a year older than you, Y/N.’’ he said, his voice a little amused now. You rolled your eyes.

’’You’re an old soul, Jean. My shift will be over soon so spit it out...What’s bothering yo-’’

’’Did you study Eren’s file?’’ he asked out of the blue. You sighed and took another cigarette out and placed it in your mouth.

’’Not yet. Tonight I plan on looking over it. Why? Wanna tell me something about him that might help me in writing his profile?’’

Jean shook his head and took a puff out of his cigarette.

’’Once you look over it, after you read our statements  about him that are also included there, before writing any report, I want you to tell me something that might help me.’’ you raised a brow in confusion but he wasn’t looking at you anymore. He was staring straight ahead at the city covered in the red light of the sunset.

’’Who do you think will hesitate when shooting? Us or Eren ?’’

You ran a hand through your hair and looked at the city too. As the night approached, it suddenly looked more dangerous.

‘Who indeed…?’ . . . . . Before leaving you stopped by Hange’s office to drop some of the work you completed for the day. Moblit, her assistant, the guy who you knew for a fact was the only one besides Levi to be able to control your workaholic Director, was trying to force feed her some pizza while she insisted that she had to look over some DNA samples found at a random crime scene.

’’M’am, I know you worked in the lab for most of your life but now you should be dealing only with the work Erwin had to do when he had your position. He didn't try to be in ten places at once! Come on, eat this slice. You didn't eat all day! Do I really have to message Levi right now? You know he always gets pissed when you act like this.’’

When Hange noticed you at the door she took the opportunity and sprinted to the lab leaving a stressed Moblit behind who was still holding a pizza slice in his right hand staring at you in disbelief . Poor man. You placed your work on Hange’s desk and eyed Moblit and then the pizza. You smiled like a cunning, old, hungry dog.

’’I’ll call The Captain for you if you give me two slices of that pizza. Deal?’’ Moblit sighed. ’’Deal.’’

So there you were now, walking out of the building towards your car, while happily munching on your pizza slice. You planned on eating the other one at home, later, if you’d get hungry while working late. You entered your car and threw your stuff on the passenger seat. You started the engine and drove home while listening to the radio. Weirdly enough there was a radio podcast about astrology. You found it weird because this type of podcast would usually be broadcast in the morning. When you heard your zodiac sign being mentioned you couldn’t help but pay a little attention. You were curious afterall and maybe some luck was ahead of you. ’You never know.’

’’As I said John, the (your zodiac) sign should really be careful about what they say and do...The ruler of divine punishment, Jupiter seems to have entered a rare conjunction. The past is catching up to them and it looks like they can’t run away from certain confrontations anymore. It could be with someone else or maybe with themselves. Also, it would be especially good to avoid Fire Signs around this time for (your zodiac), as all three, Aries, Leo and Sagittarius are chaos bringers in this Jupiter conjunction. So you heard me? Don’t try to dig into anything too much these days...You might just bury yourself.’’

You started laughing.

’’Pfft, yeah right... What a load of crap.’’ you said displeased as you turn off the radio.

You finally reach home. After you park and lock your car you enter your apartment building and as always you take the elevator, too lazy to drag your tired body on the stairs. You only think about soaking yourself in a warm bath as soon as possible. You might even use the new bubble bath stuff you got last week. ’Yeah, I think I will do just that. My body aches everywhere anyway, I need some relaxation.’

So immediately after you unlocked your door, you dropped your stuff, and went straight to the bathroom to turn on the warm water. Hell, you might’ve even skipped on the way as you were so happy to finally just have a moment of forgetting everything about anything and just indulge in the warmth and the nice smell of a warm bath.

So happy that you didn’t even bother to turn on the light in the living room.

Because if you did, you would have noticed Eren Yeager, sitting on your couch with a gun by his side.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Preview:

You looked at Eren. You looked at the gun. You looked at the gun. You looked at Eren.

There were many things you wanted to say in that moment but strangely enough a rather unusual question was bothering you more than anything.

’’You never mentioned your birthday,’’ you said not believing you were actually asking this out of all things, ’’not that you forgot to mention things like your name or the fact that you’re right now, probably the most wanted criminal in the...world ...ha ha ....but who keeps track, am I right?’’ you laughed nervously.

’’My birthday..?’’ he asked while watching you suspiciously but calm at the same time. ’’Why?’’

You kept your distance. Your position was stiff and you couldn’t help but be surprised that he was right in front of you. In your house ...again...in less than 24h. Why in Isayama’s name was he here?

’’Nothing important really...Just something silly.’’ again, you let out a nervous laugh. You were in trouble and you didn’t have your fucking gun on you and your phone was in the bag.

Eren let out a sigh and shook his head.

’’Hm, shouldn’t you, miss profiler, know that about me already?’’ He placed his hands behind his head and leaned deeper on one of the back pillows. His position was relaxed but something told you to not risk going for the gun. It might even be a trap anyway.

’’March, 30.’’ he surprisingly answered after a short silence.

‘March...Weren’t Pisces in March? Nah, this man ain’t no Pisces...Too unhinged...What’s next...Oh.’ you closed your eyes in frustration, ’... Aries.’

’’Great, freaking Fire Sign. Of course you are.'’

You weren’t sure if you should listen to that type of radio podcast more often or 

never again.

when you find out your signs are not the greatest match ever 

[alotsgonnachange]

Mystic Messenger Saeran’s AE Thoughts (.......And Prayers..) #Spoilerz

Hello, I just finished Saeran’s after ending and I have a lot of things to say and I am going to write it down while I'm still all keyed up about it.

First of all… Please DO NOT ask me how much money I spent to finish this as fast as I did…. I’m grown but my bank account is certainly going to have a good ole fashioned CHUCKLE at this….. It’s been a long quarantine I deserve a lil happiness as a treat methinks!

I have been playing this absolutely insane game since I think 2016? When I first started playing the deep routes had JUST come out I think? And I was just finishing up high school and am now a college grad...lmao

I’ve played all routes at least once except Jaehee but i’ve seen walkthroughs of her route (I’ve heard it makes you hate Jumin and he’s my favorite so um. hehe). V’s and Saeran’s routes I found to be so emotionally intense and just….a lot and I've been waiting a long ass god damn time for this after ending okay…. I would theorize and make up an ending in my head but i’m no writer so it was hard to figure out lol. I’m a Jumin stan mostly but I love everybody and yeah I should probably play that jumin dlc too but I need like a DAY to recover from Saeran’s AE. Enough about me HERE are my thoughts on it overall

Major Saeran AE Spoilers under da cut!

Can we please discuss V showing up to the C+R conference room with basically chloroform and made everybody Pass Out like??? I was alone in my room at like midnight just SCREAMING at my phone???? And the creepy ass CG ???? It’s like that gif of sarah paulson from ahs being like “I put arsenic in the wine….and the pasta”

Anyway I screamed at V a lot during this process!!

Loved RFA being sweet and kind to saeran (before V fucking drugged them…)

This is such common V behavior “I have to do it all myself...there’s no other way..” GIRL SHUT UPPP You do this every route....

SO many CG’s and I enjoy them a lot

Saeran’s sprite looks a little TOO crisp compared to everyone else but maybe its a glitch??? V next to him is in 480p while saeran is like 1080p

Hearing both Saeran and Saeyoung missing the other brother the whole time??? PAIN. All my homies know is PAIN

BOSS and his V for Vendetta ass guy fawkes mask??? I literally yelled “this game is TERRIBLE!!” several times at my phone

Their dad is so>??????? When he was sitting on the couch with saeyoung in that one CG while simultaneously telling him to kill himself?????????? Maybe chairman han is actually the best dad in this game somehow

When V and Rika were like we’re back together teehee teehee okay pack it up bonnie and clyde ..

When chairman han calls u and says hes jealous of u and saeran…..HUH????? I’m calling HR

When they go to the apartment and see boss and vanderwood and poor saeyoung is sitting there seeing his brother for the first time in years i wanted to D word sooooo bad like PAIN...PAIN….

Can we HAVE A DISCUSSION ABOUT JUMIN HAN BEING THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE GAME AND HE LOST EVERYTHING IN THIS AE……. he just took the blame and moved on jumin what the hell….. I love him so much r we serious? He watched his 2 closest friends betray him in the worst way and found out abt how Rika abused Saeyoung and Saeran???? I felt just AWFUL. Terrible ...Terrible….

Rika’s change in demeanor from Saeran's actual route is certainly a Choice. I find her much more bearable this time around and unfortunately i think I was too nice to her and ended up with a bad end LMFAO

I was happy to see Saeran stand up for himself and become stronger and confident. You go king!

The CG of Yoosung laying in Zen’s lap is everything to me…

HOWEVER YUP I sure did get a bad ending and I was so mad fdsafdskfdhsf ! (I would be happy to clarify how I got the good one the second time.) MAKE SURE To SAVE EARLY in days 2 and 3 bc the branches on day 4 is where the bad end will show up. For me it was the first day 4 chat and then a story mode titled “SAVIOR”.... If you see that RUN FOR THE HILLS!!

I was so mad! But I had saved in day 2 and replayed and MANAGED to get good end

I’m obsessed with everyone calling V and Rika “that psychotic couple” like…..its true its true…

No those two are so toxic… V’s route was torture watching them go on and on about the sun like yo can yall just call each other babe like normal people.

I respect straight people but not V and RIka that shit was just wrong… Straight marriage was a mistake

Oh lord i also FULLY Forgot Rika killed the twins’ mother…. Yeah that scene was um Certainly a lot but it needed to happen eventually

Like it’s good they know but damn that storyline is just so bleak

I think it was satisfying TO A DEGREE….To see Rika understand where she was wrong, why she was wrong, fess up and even APOLOGIZE! I was very surprised.

Saeran and Saeyoung are Certainly twins with the amount that those two self sacrifice in every route MY GOD…..

The scene with Jumin talking to his father and the other scene of him praying oh my god I cannot tell you how happy I was to see him begin to understand and address his own feelings in a route that was not his own. My main problem with Jumin’s route has always been the trapping MC in his penthouse aspect.. This way Jumin understands love and emotions without being overly possessive !!! YAY also loved seeing him be on good terms with his dad who was surprisingly profound

That last Story mode was Really a Lot…. and Strange things occurred which I will get into in just a minute

Jumin becoming a politician is so funny but ngl … i see it.

Yoosung going to france to study pastries ok king I see u! (it made more sense to me than the vet thing anyway)

Lastly Zen FURRY ERA

MY BEEF With the AE

I was happy with how they handled it for the most part. I think Cheritz heard our feedback about V’s after ending and was like okay….let’s try something different

HOWEVER

Saeran…. Sweet kind saeran… IS SO AFFECTIONATE HAHA….

He must have said I love you like 300 times…..very mushy gushy flowery language...and maybe that’s just his personality but for me it was like eating cake with buttercream cake. It means well, but god damn is it sugary and going to cause a stomach ache later.

He was just… SO MUCH! SO forward and ON all the time in his affections. I honestly felt kind of smothered and by day 3 and 4 I was sooooo over all the compliments… King you’ve come a very long way, but ur still putting MC on a pedestal and probably need to see a therapist.

Nextly….Rika and V….. Naw that knock out gas really ...that hurt lol. Coming from “I would do anything to protect RFA” V? Idk like…. EYE felt betrayed reading that. It was just hurtful. I can’t even imagine how the members would have felt as they were passing out. It was just so cruel. I suppose I understand why but like?? Just TERRIBLE

Them being in cahoots with the agency and the prime minister..HUH??? Also too much

V just felt so irresponsible like I do understand that he ended up in a weird web of secrets that’s hard to untangle but he’s so fucking stubborn he’s SO stubborn it makes me insane. Like sir… It seems like in other routes he wanted to try to protect Rika and the RFA.. But in this AE it seems more to me that he was like yeah i’m protecting Rika and That’s It… so fucking hurtful to me. Both of y’all apologize ESPECIALLY to the twins and Jumin..

The forgiveness thing…… Okay so I think some people will not like that Saeran decided to “forgive” the people who hurt him (Rika, V, Saejoong, his mother). I would point out that I actually think this was approached somewhat well. He says at one point that he doesn’t think they’re good or bad, just people. I think he sounded mature and like this was the way for him personally to accomplish his healing process. Would I have loved for Saeran to flip V and Rika off and kick Saejoong off a cliff? Yea I really would. But like…. If that’s what HE needs to do to heal then who am I to judge?

HOWEVER…. Everything Eye just said goes out the window when the scenes at the end with Saejoong come up… I was PERPLEXED. Like why did he HUG his deranged father who just kicked the shit out of him??? Also all the chat options that MC has with him r like blah blah you’re like this because no one loves you were so corny to me LMFAOOOO?

AND WHEN HE WAS IN THE ROOM LATER WITH SAERAN… i’m sorry but if that were me I would have called a nurse to deck his ass. Cool he turned himself in YOU SUCK SOOOO BAD AND I NEVER WANT YOU TO COME NEAR SAEYOUNG AND SAERAN AGAIN THANKS.

*scratches ass* I wish I got to see saeyoung and saeran finally sit down and have that first conversation after a long time and hug CG but the ending was fine I GUESS….. I dont care about ROMANCE I want those boys to be happy brothers together

Anyway that was really emotionally exhausting but I fr think I got it out of my system after literal years… And I can rest in peace knowing the choi twins are happy. THATS ALL I WANTED TO KNOW!!!!

[reynie-muldoons]

'Depends on the Wagon' liveblog!

I saw someone do timestamps in their liveblog and it was absolutely lovely, so I think I'll try that too

1:55 why does Curtain sound like an mlm ceo LMAO

2:07 WOW ASSHOLE 😂😂 waving off your own teacher when he was complimenting you is not the vibe

2:17 so Dr. Curtian is only available through chain emails. Got it.

2:27 he seems like the kind of asshole to say that people on welfare are lazy and exploitave but then like, not pay his taxes

2:42 I DON'T LIKE HOW HE SAID THAT, THAT WAS CREEPY

2:47 oooooh Constance, always asking the right questions

3:05 Kate, why are you yelling, it's literally past curfew 😂

3:35 oh hai Jackson.. gtfo

4:22 oh yeah, the best way out is through the hallway that Jackson just entered. Good plane, babe.

4:25 soooo Kate Depending On Friends arc :)

4:59 AYYY HI RHONDA!!

5:13 why do I kinda fucking love then all deciphering the Morse code together

5:20 so the kids use the gemini riddle? Not the adults???

5:36 his face when he figures it out 😭😭😭

5:46 Nathaniel? Guess that's Dr. Curtain's name now. Less ridiculous than Ledroptha, but you dont get the badass Let Drop the Curtain reference

6:53 okay so no one knew he had a brother? But he did???

7:21 his faaaace 🥺

7:29 AWWW HE COULDNT BRING HIMSELF TO SHARE 😭😭😭 okay I'm kinda on board with the change if they can make it work in the long-haul

7:42 hi Milligan, good timing 😂

7:56 "not the time.........I'll take a dozen" Number Two my LOVE

8:23 interesting. I dont think Mr. Benedict was adopted in the books? He certainly didn't let Violet's family, the Hopefields, because he knew their financial troubles would be even worse. So who?

8:54 ohhhh dear, stages of grief at work. Maybe don't do that

9:05 I talked about this in the MBS discord server, but I think the show is really nailing Mr. Benedict's feelings. He's always been an emotional person, but he has to be so careful. Bottling up your feelings only leads to bigger feelings later. It makes so much sense for Mr. Benedict to be a whirlpool of strong, repressed emotions.

9:11 MILLIGAN'S FACE JAHAHS

9:34 RHONDA'S FACE HAGSKDGDJ

9:40 Mr. Benedict, sweetheart 🥺❤

10:01 "brothers stick together" why does it sound like he's talking about Reynie here 😭😭😭😭

10:12 that is a good ass point, Mr. Benedict already lied to them once

10:21 it makes sense for Sticky to be the one questioning the most because of his anxiety, but damn

10:46 AWWWWWW

10:56 KATE MAKING A BED FORT KATE MAKING A BED FORT KATE MAKING A BED FORT

11:00 I dont like how aggressive Kate is but it makes sense considering she's been in the circus for years, taking care of herself for far longer than she hasn't. She's not good at depending on people, and she's not good with difficult people.

11:10 Yeahh, Constance gets it!

11:40 Yeahhh, Constance gets it

12:55 that teacher seemed pretty nice last episode, nice to see that they're not what they seem just the same as Dr. Curtain lol

13:28 CONSTANCE I LOVE YOU 😂😂

14:00 "check again" okay so Krista from the tests and Martina give off the same vibe.. perfect 😂

14:16 "yeah......hang in there :D"

15:05 all of the apologies to the general class.. he's such an anxious sweetheart. He's really reading as autistic to me.

My sister just called me 😑 it's like 8 am, I answered her like "did you ever consider that you might be waking me up?" She did not consider that 😂

15:22 Martina's face just growing more and more annoyed and disgruntled HAHA

15:29 that was CORRECT?? WHAAAA

15:51 throwback to when I compared Dr. Curtain to an mlm ceo.. definitely like a cult

16:44 ohhhh Martina

17:30 CONSTANCE HEARING VOICES HELLOOOOO

18:22 ayyyyyy helper man

18:40 he seems too cheery to be a helper .-. The helpers all being super sad made [redacted]'s story make a whole lot more sense

19:35 aaaand now we get to it. You know, it really does seem a lot more cultish on screen than in the book

19:53 WAIT CONSTANCE GOOD JOB PUTTING THE PIECES TOGETHER 😂😂😂😂

19:53 that cut to Milligan making that exact face was INCREDIBLE

20:05 was he tryna leave? Yeah, good fuckin luck bucko

20:10 "critical papers at home" my ass, they packed everything up

20:24 the stages of grief back at it. 🥺

20:38 their relationship >>>>

21:00 "located in the..?" *description of envelope* "located in the....?" *more description* "located in the????" 😂😂😂😂

21:34 ohhhhh Thursday must be the student ranking day

21:56 Martina seems like the kind to throw out "pick a god and pray" as a crit quote 😂

22:07 I don't see any of the Society'a names on the list. Maybe they havent been there long enough

22:17 OH SHIT JK THERE THEY ARE

22:25 ohh Kate and Constance

22:55 the combination of the ferry horn and the bell makes it weirdly grim

23:55 them bringing Kate up and reminding her that she's needed 😌✨

24:29 hi Milligan bb ilyyyy

24:35 real good lookout guys, y'all are so well hidden

24:52 AYY HE'S DOING IT KATE STYLE

26:31 "visionary" is a word for it

26:31 I really kinda love that Number Two and Rhonda are going to such depths to try and help Mr. Benedict figure this out for sure

26:56 Mr. Benedict fully walking away while they talk about his brothers accomplishments 😂 I'm laughing, but poor guy

27:08 his FACE 🥺

27:28 HERE'S THAT TANTRUM FROM THE TRAILER

27:28 take your guesses how many times will he fall asleep

27:50 "he just has to work through some things" you dont fuckin say

27:55 you mean to tell me he had a full blown meltdown and they didn't show him falling asleep once??

28:35 like father like daughter 😌✨

29:10 ayyyy secret desk compartment

29:19 honestly I'm surprised there were actually papers he needed and it wasnt an excuse to go confront Dr. Curtain

29:32 oh shit, how'd they manage to get that far inside? No one was there to guard it, but the maze itself is a security measure

29:42 KATE STYLE STRIKES AGAIN

29:47 ooooh I like Dr. Curtain's office

30:01 WAS THAT SQ AND DID HE JUST CALL DR. CURTAIN HIS DAD

30:41 birds have careers. Got it 😂

30:50 JOURNAAAL

31:02 the fox?? Reynard the fox???

31:27 ohhh here we go, Dr. Curtain sees himself in Reynie only to resent it later

31:37 Mr. Benedict called Reynie a leader once too.. the parallels have ✨begun✨

32:12 is this the "keep your enemies close" conversation??

32:15 I'm honestly surprised he called him Sticky and not George

32:42 IT IS SQ IT IS SQ IT IS SQ

32:59 sooo that starts by not letting his caution down with you

33:11 Dr. Curtain congratulating himself mid-conversation on saying something deep is so in character

33:20 "I was betrayed by someone very close to me" so that was Mr. Benedict. Who the fuck else would it be

33:23 WHAT DID I SAAAAY

33:31 oh noooo Reynie starts doubting Mr. Benedict here? Is that the move?

33:43 that transition was so pretty stoppp

33:53 again how hasn't he fallen asleep

34:55 ayyyy journal snooping

35:05 Constance, my love, you are cut throat

35:11 Milligan is in the DRYWALL? ohh buddy be careful

35:21 omfg are they talking about water polo 😂 I love that that's the sport of choice

35:51 ayyyy they put the Milligan dots together too. Shame the guy's not with them rn

36:36 so Mr. Benedict brings up cheating first? I really like how we get to see the adults riddling out what to send back, we didn't get that at all in the books

37:46 I LOVE THAT THEY KEPT "don't get caught"

38:51 Kate riddling out the island schematics engineer style is so like her

39:07 they're just walking out the door?? Huh???

39:29 babe... turn off your flashlight

39:33 AND THAT'S WHY

39:58 is that the precursor to chuckroot?

40:38 the papers were from his orphanage 🥺🥺🥺

41:14 why does that break my heart

41:19 Dr. Curtain and SQ doing shit together it just.. so heartwarming

42:00 HAHA

42:16 okay, so show!Curtain is a kissass 😂

42:35 wait wait wait so Dr. Curtain is actively trying to contain his brother? That would explain why the Recruiters were looking for him and weirdly not the kids

43:25 "power wants to be free" sounds more like a personal mantra than a conversation between engineers

43:41 YES A LETTER TO MISS PERUMAL

44:02 more voices. Poor Connie girl 🥺

44:36 he loves her so much 😭😭😭

44:45 SHE TRIED TO SEND HIM A CARE PACKAGE

45:13 WORRIED MOM TIMEEE

[sweet-evie]

you would probably be able to go on forever answering this (and honestly i would love something like the way u did when u answered if he loved shirley or kallen more after cc.. if it's not too much trouble for you 😅) but what convinced you that lelouch loves cc the most out of all the other girls (shirley & kallen)? taking just the series into consideration first then the movie. thank u!

Lol true 🤣😂 I could ramble forever.

And if it's about CLuCLu? 🤭😅😂 You better be ready for a lengthy (and I mean lengthy) essay. 😍😂

As for who Lelouch loves the most? 

I'm not so sure I would say C.C...

Canonically speaking, that would be Nunnally... And then probably Suzaku (platonically & shipping aside).

It's honestly not so much as I think he loves C.C. the most, it's just the ship that's to my taste. I mean, it's pretty obvious he cared about everyone he had personal relationships with. And I'm not Lelouch so I can't give a definitive answer. Lelouch is so complicated. 🙉😂

We could look at the subtle affection between them though 🤣😂😅 And why Lelouch & C.C. are soooo compatible (in my humble opinion).

But before we do... 

Let’s dive into the background.

And let's address the elephant in this essay.

C.C. betrayed Lelouch by lying to him for the majority of the series.

Okay... But do we understand why?

This is why I don't outright judge any character in Code Geass, because they all have a reason for doing what they do... well, the main cast anyway.

I saw this in a translation of the official texts... 

C.C. is the kind of code bearer who is torn between wanting to die or fulfilling her true wish. She purposely makes her contractors hate her for the sake of making it easier for them to take her code and kill her one day. (Which is why Mao doesn't work. Because he's too obsessed with her to kill her). Because she's desperate to die, and end her suffering. But let's not forget that she also has a secret wish: to be loved... 💝💘❤💗

Throughout R1 (and you only realize this after you watch the series in its entirety) and most of R2, C.C. is hellbent on making sure she dies that time around (especially because Lelouch shows so much promise and potential for ending her existence). Now why would I say that?

She deliberately lies to Lelouch and withholds information from him to make him hate her. So it would be easy to kill her and she gets to die, and he walks off happy without emotional baggage or trauma... In C.C.'s POV, that's a win-win. Her hypothetical scenario looks something like, "I make you hate me, that way when the time comes, you can kill me easily. I finally end my hell of immortality, and you get to live forever, although you may hate it one day like I did."

But you know what's fucking sad?

Aside from living on and on and having accumulated experiences and seeing the world and finding the entire point of life pointless and hopeless, the romantic part of me strongly believes C.C. wants to die because she 1) gives up on life and 2), she doesn't think anyone can truly love her after everything. She may have been hopeful, probably in the early years of immortality, but after everything she's been through, it's fucking impossible.

That might as well be canon. 😆 For all I know, it probably is. 🙉🤷‍♀️

Anyway, back to the point before I went on a weird tangent...

Remember, C.C. even asks him that question outright when they were in the Avalon. Remember? Kallen cockblocked them 🤣🤣😂😂

She asked if he hated her after everything she'd done to him (contextually speaking, & not the actual C.C. quote)

Anyway, when Lelouch finds out the terms of the contract... what happens?

He's moved by empathy... Because in his words, "Living just to die is so sad." He's too damn kind. C.C.'s intentions and plans BACKFIRE. It was in this moment that I believe Lelouch starts to understand (like truly 💯 understand) the depth of C.C.'s sadness and her personal tragedy.

He already started doing so in R1 when he saw her many deaths and he said he'll be a demon because she's a witch.

This series has reaffirmed the nature of their relationship as accomplices and partners plenty of times. First it was C.C. reiterating that in early R1, then Lelouch affirms it after the Mao-shooting-C.C.-in-Clovisland incident, and then the one I mentioned where they said they'd be a warlock/demon & a witch.

Now we circle back to R2, where Lelouch learns her true wish and gets to really see her. Like, C.C. in her entirety. From former slave-girl, to Geass-wielder, and then code-bearer.

Their complicated-turned-wholesome relationship has a slow and subtle build-up that mounts to, dare I say, a satisfying conclusion. For me anyway.

Because in the end, Lelouch did motivate C.C. to start living again. And C.C. stuck with Lelouch even if she didn't have to.

And he came to death smiling. 🥺😭

CG isn't about romance.

But if it did have an element of explicit romance between C.C. and Lelouch, I wouldn't have had complaints. It could have been a tragedy still, and I would be happy with it.

“C.C. didn't have to struggle as much for Lelouch's affection and that she got everything handed to her in a silver platter.” <-------- WRONG!

I do believe Lelouch bounces between hating C.C. and needing her. Like a fucking spectrum. And until her true self is revealed to him, I don't think Lelouch saw C.C. as a human being. Just another means to an end.

Lelouch & C.C.'s relationship is as bumpy as Lelouch & Suzaku's, albeit more subtle in its complications. Obviously, the SuzaLuLu dynamic is more fleshed out compared to CLuCLu because duh, CG is Lelouch & Suzaku's story. 😅

I can literally point out every moment where Lelouch is hating on C.C., and when you can tell he's desperate for her help and her presence. (But that's for another post 😂😂) Point is, he does it plenty of times that it's obvious their relationship is far from lovey-dovey hearts and rainbows.

So no, any sliver of implied romance between them is neither forced nor instant. There 👏 was 👏 build 👏 up! 👏

If CLuCLu romance was an actual thing in the show, it would have been so interesting to see the progression.

It's built on a slow but steady train to Love Land 🤣😂 Slow burn at its finest, as I imagine it would have taken two seasons before either Lelouch or C.C. would fess up and confess. Hell, it took them 2 seasons to care about each other deeply in all reality.

If it were a real shoujo romance, it would have been built on a unique trust... you know, the kind that only crops up when you've seen each other's lowest points and still choose to support one another. Unconditional love and all that 🤪🥳

It's not a stretch to say that Suzaku and C.C. saw plenty of moments where Lelouch was at his lowest, rawest moments. Moments where he strips himself of pride and his façade, and he caves to his burdens.

Lovely example of this is the C's World episode,

Also this scene where he calls and begs Suzaku to protect Nunnally...

And the times Lelouch grieves and despairs in C.C.'s presence.

They even added that lovely scene in the Recaps where he's despairing over Suzaku being Lancelot's pilot and having to fight his best friend. And C.C. is there offering him her advice and being the realistic voice.

A Brief Opinion on Re;surrection

The ending of Re;surrection was truly the closing of unfinished business between him and C.C... and as messy as that movie was, I still love that they touched on the profound meaning behind the names C.C. and Lelouch choose for themselves.

Re;surrection is Lelouch & C.C.'s moment 💯! CLuCLu fanservice at its finest. It's actually a decent (not great) alternate route if Lelouch lives after being killed. Plus, it's kind of obvious now that Re;surrection and the Recap films set it up to be CLuCLu end-game.

Still, it could have gone differently. Lelouch could have stayed behind and let C.C. leave. He had a choice. No one was asking Lelouch to go, and C.C. certainly wasn't goading him into leaving with her. Plus, it's obvious people wanted him to stay. Suzaku and Nunnally especially.

So of all the people he could have chosen to be with at the end of that movie, why her then?

Well, probably because C.C. really does know him and understand him on a level that's not easily achievable by many. Only matched by Suzaku, really. (Even Nunnally could admit to never really understanding Lelouch because her older brother shielded her as much as he could from being touched by the true cruelty of the world).

She wasn't handed his affection on a silver platter and vice versa. It's a relationship that developed mutual trust and understanding, even paving the way to noble sacrifice. Also, their sass is fucking on point.

And honestly, ever since Lelouch chose Geass and his path of blood, he wasn't exactly tethered to the world like a normal human being would be anymore. Both the original and alternate timeline express that wonderfully.

After everything he'd been through and the kind of power he'd acquired (both in the original & alternate timeline), I'd say he now exists on a level that's a little bit on par with C.C... Whether he wanted it or not, he tied his own fate to C.C.'s, in a way, when he accepted that contract and by making the choices that he did.

With that said,

In comparison to the main characters shipped with Lelouch -- Shirley, Kallen, and Euphemia -- C.C. (and Suzaku, honestly) have the edge for a romance with Lelouch. (According to my opinion! 👏👏👏)

Lelouch and Suzaku are opposites... Moon & Sun

Lelouch and C.C. are complements... Moon & Star

I know that's fucking cheesy 🧀🧀🧀 But it's the only metaphor I can think of. 😆😅 (Also, can you tell how pro-SuzaCLuCLu I am?)

All of that ⬆️ got me on board the CLuCLu train. And honestly, I don't want to leave.

[a-solitary-marshmallow]

Do No Harm Take No Shit Chapter 5 - Home(room) Coming

They discussed how best to break the news to everyone, while feeding each other ice cream. (call Adrien a sap, he didn’t care, this was the best day of his fucking life) It seemed a bit obtrusive to walk into class and announce, ‘Hello Marinette is my girlfriend now, any questions?’

On the other hand, Lila would probably take advantage of any ambiguity. Not to mention Adrien’s fans – they would throw a tantrum when he and Marinette went public.

In the end, the simple approach was taken. Adrien took a selfie of them sharing their couples’ cone, one in which Marinette’s face was scrunched up adorably as he dabbed strawberry ice cream on the tip of her nose. Her hair was out and tumbling in the breeze, slapping Adrien on the cheek while he laughed and held the camera up blindly. It was his favourite shot – he was almost loathe to share it with the world. A quick caption. Magical ice cream with my magical girlfriend – best day of my life. Adrien posted it on Monday morning while the Gorilla drove them to school.

“Aaaaand… done.” He leaned his head against Marinette’s shoulder and watched the comments start to filter in.

“That was fast.” Marinette said.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’ve got a few stalkers on here.”

“You don’t say.” She teased.

Paris flashed by, and then they had arrived. They walked into the school hand in hand – Marinette’s hand was an honour Adrien held with pride. In the hallway Mylène glanced at them, glanced away casually, and then her gaze snapped back, accompanied by unashamed jaw-dropping. She elbowed Ivan, who looked around and blinked at the two, before grinning excitedly. They started to whisper between themselves. Adrien stifled a laugh.

“So,” He murmured as they walked, “How many people know about your huge crush on me, exactly?”

Marinette groaned. “No.”

“Because if Alya and Nino were shipping us…”

“Please, there are too many names to remember. You are the one person who didn’t know.”

“Was everyone on team Marinette-Adrien?”

“Adrienette.”

“What?”

Marinette looked away, face blushing a lovely shade of red. “Nothing.”

Adrien hummed and swung their joined hands. After a moment, Marinette gathered her courage and spoke again.

“Most people were on the team. Except for Chloe, of course.”

“Chloe’s always the exception.” Adrien noted.

They stepped inside the class, and Rose began to squeal. Adrien jumped at the pitch of it – all eyes were on them suddenly. He smiled nervously at the wide-mouthed stares.

“Uh, hi?”

“Congratulations!” Rose squealed. She rushed down from her chair to hug Marinette and Adrien in turn, swiftly followed by a grinning Alya who slung an arm around her best friend’s shoulder.

“Mari! Why didn’t you say something earlier? Congrats you two!”

The class was loud with cheers and excited voices. Kim laughed from his seat, “Adrien, bro! We thought you were gonna be oblivious forever.”

“Well, what can I say?” Adrien shrugged, fingers still tangled with Marinette’s. “I saw the light.”

“Oh, this is wonderful!” Rose cried. She glanced back to the very stiff figure sitting at her desk, “Lila, I told you they would figure it out!”

“Yes, you did.” Lila’s voice dripped with saccharine contempt. Adrien could feel her glare drilling into him from across the classroom. He suppressed the animalistic urge to bristle and hiss, instead sending a sweet smile towards the teeth-gritting girl. ‘Look out. You have no idea who you’re messing with.’

“So, when did this happen?” Alya urged. Marinette shrugged.

“This weekend. We went out, and talked, and… well.” She slightly lifted their joined hands, and the girls cooed. Marinette’s cheeks were flushed with happiness – even Lila’s presence didn’t seem to impact her. Adrien wished she could be this happy all the time. Damn it if he wasn’t going to try and make it so. “I’m expecting some rabid fangirl lashback though.”

Alya crinkled her nose. “Ew. Don’t worry Mari, we’ve got your back.”

“I know. Thank you.”                

“Soooo,” Alya leaned in towards the new couple, “I was wondering, would you guys object to a slight seat change today? I really want to sit next to my boyfriend, and – gosh – that leaves you two together in the front row!”

“Real smooth, Alya.” Alix elbowed her with a snort. Marinette laughed.

“I’d like that. Adrien?”

“Definitely.” He said fervently.

“Oh, and do you guys want to have lunch at my house?” Marinette offered Nino and Alya. Nino sighed happily.

“Ah, Dupain-Cheng pastries. It’s been too long.”

“So that’s a yes.” Alya clarified.

 The classes went quickly, with Marinette by Adrien’s side. When she was waiting for the other students to finish up with their note taking, she would doodle in the corners of her sketchbook. Adrien picked up her pen to draw a little love heart on her cast. She returned the favour on the back of his hand. At lunch time he, Marinette, Alya and Nino met outside the classroom to walk to Marinette’s house. They were about to start off when a voice called out.

“Oh! Would you mind if I joined you?” Lila’s sickeningly sweet cry made Adrien stiffen. Marinette bit her lip, hard, as Alya and Nino turned to see the brunette hurrying over. Alya tipped her head with a confused smile.

“Of course, girl, but I thought you were busy? You said you were having lunch with… a special someone?” Alya pointed surreptitiously to her earrings. Lila sighed, an impressive show of disappointment.

“Oh, I was so looking forward to having lunch together, but she had to cancel! Her partner got into trouble and she had to go and bail him out again. Honestly, cats can be so troublesome can’t they?”

Oh. Cats, earrings. Was Lila really talking about Ladybug? Having lunch with Ladybug? Not only was that an incredibly stupid thing to brag about, given the whole being-targeted-by-a-supervillain thing, but Lila had picked the wrong people to boast to. Adrien was almost ready to give her a cataclysm to the face.

But he wasn’t suited up right now, and Alya had already invited Lila along with a smile and a reassurance that she was sure it wasn’t personal, Lila’s bestie was a very busy person after all. A quick glance at Marinette’s uninjured arm revealed the way her fists were clenched. Adrien threaded his fingers through hers and squeezed her hand. I know. It’s bullshit.

“Are you guys coming?” Nino called from up ahead. The others had already started off. Adrien pasted on his model smile.

“Yep! We’ll catch up to you in a sec.”

“Adrien.” Marinette whispered. He turned to her, allowed his smile to drop into a scowl that mirrored hers. “I don’t want Lila in my house.”

He shuddered. “Ugh, I know, I’ve already had that experience. She’s creepy.”

“No, you don’t understand.” She whispered desperately. “Lila hates me. What if she gets her hands on something important? What if she finds the miracle box? Or lies to my parents? Or spills paint on my ball gown commission? She knows I’m being commissioned by Clara Nightingale, she asked Alya about it the other day. I’ve been working on it for weeks, if she ruins it I’ll have to start again and buy all the fabrics with my own money and the bakery will go broke and Maman and Papa will have to sell and I’ll never get a job in fashion and I’ll live on the streets and get stabbed in a mugging and-”

Adrien squeezed her hand, and Marinette trailed off.

“It’ll be fine.” He promised. “We won’t go to your house.”

Marinette looked up at him with such desperation, that Adrien felt his heart break. Had he really made her feel like this? That no one was here for her? Adrien lifted her hand to kiss it before turning to call after the three students on the footpath ahead of them.

“Guys, hold up! Marinette forgot about a huge order her parents have at the bakery, if we go there we’ll just be in the way. There’s a cool café down the road we can go to instead.”

Lila’s eyes widened like a kicked puppy’s. “I-I don’t have any money with me, I gave it all to Prince’s Ali’s charity for disabled orphans.” She put on a pained smile. “It’s okay, though. I don’t need to get anything – my diabetes won’t be a huge problem if I skip a meal or two. It’s enough to just spend time with my favourite people.”

Alya ‘awww’ed and slung an arm around Lila’s shoulder. “Mari, are you sure we can’t just stop by your place? Your folks have plenty of food they don’t sell, right?”

Marinette squeaked. Adrien spoke over her smoothly. “Don’t worry, Lila! I’ll pay for your lunch. It’s the least I can do, after how good you are to those disabled orphans.”

He could feel Lila’s glare, and it was hilarious. She said sweetly, “Oh no, I couldn’t possibly take your money!”

“I’m literally rich. Besides, wouldn’t it be the same if you took Marinette’s food?” He smiled at the fuming girl. “Please, let me treat you. I’d do the same for any friend.”

He was really laying it on thick now, he could tell from Marinette’s stifled giggle. At Lila’s side, however, Alya hadn’t picked up on the passive aggressive note. She was beaming as she linked arms with Nino and Lila. “Great! Let’s go, before lunch time runs out.”

Marinette and Adrien followed behind. As they walked Marinette leaned in to murmur, “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.” Adrien whispered back. “Your knight in shining leather is always here to help.”

She snorted and bumped him. Adrien grinned.

“It’s a tail as old as time. Fur as long as I can remember, it’s always been the princess and her alley cat against the world.” Marinette groaned, but the sparkle in her eye betrayed her. “What’s wrong, Milady? Are you feline okay? You didn’t catch a cold or something, did you?”

“What secrets are you two whispering about?” Nino joked. Adrien sent him an innocent smile.

“I have no idea what you mean. I’m just complimenting my beautiful girlfriend.” He leaned in to Marinette to add, “Let me know if all the whiskering is bugging you.”

Marinette laughed out loud. “Please, Adrien. Please get some new material.”

“Why would I, when I have the purrfect puns already?” He lowered his voice again. “Seriously though, if I am annoying you or if Lila’s making you feel uncomfortable, just let me know.”

“I will, kitty.” Marinette smiled. Adrien was thrilled that he could make her smile like that. He would tell awful puns every day for the rest of his life if it would make Marinette smile.

They walked together, with a liar, to go get lunch.

  ­­­Two months later

“Are you sure about this?” Adrien asked for what seemed like the umpteenth time as Marinette shoved her bag into her locker. She still held her newly-uncasted arm carefully against her body, out of habit. “I can do it instead, it doesn’t have to be you.”

“Yes it does.” Marinette closed her locker firmly. “I have to do this. You just make sure to get it all, okay? You have an important part.”

“Of course, Milady.” Adrien wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her hair. Marinette hummed happily and buried her face in his jacket. And everything was wonderful for a short, blissful moment.

There was a faint zipping sound, and then Plagg stuck his head through the wall of the deserted locker room and barked, “She’s alone in the courtyard. Now’s the time, Pigtails.”

Adrien wished this moment would never end. Alas, he could not hold the love of his life forever. Marinette proved that when she lifted her head.

“Okay.” She pulled in a deep breath and smiled up at Adrien.

“You’ve got this.” He told her. She nodded.

“Yeah. Okay. Tikki, spots on.”

  When it was over Adrien rushed to meet Marinette in the garden behind the school, tucked away between trees and bundles of flowers. She had beaten him there and had already detransformed, Tikki sitting on a nearby branch and munching on a cookie. When Adrien arrived she looked up at him with tear-filled eyes and lifted her arms.

“Hey, hey.” Adrien ran into her embrace and hugged her tightly. She was shaking. “It’s okay. You did it. You were amazing Marinette, and now it’s all over.”

“I know.” Marinette mumbled again him. “I just can’t believe…”

“I know.” He held her firmly and Marinette returned the gesture, clutching at his back. “You’re done. You can relax now.”

Marinette made a muffled sound. Adrien stroked her hair.

“Do you wanna go home?”

She nodded, not lifting her face from his chest.

“Do you wanna be alone?”

She shook her head.

“Do you wanna cuddle and watch cartoons?”

Marinette nodded again.

“Do you wanna watch the Ladybug and Chat Noir movie and laugh at all the stuff that they got wrong?”

Another nod. Adrien kissed the top of her head.

“Then that can be arranged. And we’ll deal with tomorrow when it comes.”

“When it comes.” Marinette mumbled.

  Adrien walked to the front of the class the next morning just before school was due to start. Most of the students were already in their seats – including Marinette, who Adrien had insisted was due for a break. She had already done the heavy lifting of the plan, now Adrien could see it through. Besides, she didn’t need Lila targeting her even more for this. Speaking of Lila, Adrien could feel the girl’s suspicious glare drilling into his back as he spoke to Ms. Bustier.

“Excuse me miss, is it alright if I show the class something before the lesson starts? It’s urgent.”

She frowned from her desk. “Can it wait? We have a lot of important information to cover this lesson.”

“Ms. Bustier, this is very important information. I think everyone should see it as soon as possible – including you and the other teachers.”

She shook her head. “Mister Agreste, I really don’t see what could be so important that you must interrupt my lesson. Why don’t you go and sit down, and talk to the principal at lunch?”

“Because it concerns my classmates and-”

“All the more reason for it to be dealt with discreetly – we don’t need a spectacle.”

“You didn’t give Marinette that luxury.” Chloe called mildly from the front seat. Adrien turned to stare at her in disbelief. “You called her out in front of everyone during that whole cheating scandal. Why not give Adrien the same luxury? Or do I need to bring my daddy into this?” She pulled out her phone threateningly and Miss Bustier whitened.

“That will not be necessary, Chloe. I’m sure a… a few minutes is fine.”

“It won’t take long.” Adrien assured, sending Chloe a grateful look. She smiled smugly. Adrien quickly plugged in his USB and opened the document, taking a breath to raise his voice to the whole class.

“Thank you all for your time. At first I wasn’t sure if I should share this – but after doing a bit of research, I’ve found some worrying things that I think everyone here should know about.” Adrien could feel Lila’s glare searing through his forehead. He resisted the urge to smirk at her, instead schooling his expression into hesitance and worry. He had a part to play – the innocent bystander. After all, a malicious witness wasn’t very trustworthy. “I sent a copy to Mr. Damocles and the Ladyblog – Alya, you probably haven’t seen it yet – but I think it’s important that you all watch it before anyone else.”

Marinette met his eye, and nodded. Adrien smiled at her and pressed play.

[kob131]

Geez, this person really went all out with this BS rant against the show/staff. www(.)reddit( lcom/r/RWBY/comments/kiqatg/why_rwby_will_always_be_an_okay_show/

... You know I have been trying to step away from directly addressing RWBY bullshit. But...fuck it here.

If you ever talked to me about how I felt about RWBY, I would say that RWBY pre-Volume 8 has been a touchy subject for me. I felt very validated by two videos, "Why RWBY is Disappointing" and "The White Fang Problem".

Yes yes, and people with parental issues feel validated by their abusive spouse. That means nothing, especially given that one of those videos you mentioned is riddled with bullshit.

"Why RWBY is Disappointing" validated my criticism of RWBYs writing. The fact that Miles and Kerry can't and refuse to take any kind of criticism that doesn't hurt their feelings is complete [insert bad word here]. All criticism is going to hurt your feelings. Yes, you should probably ignore the long winded rants that make themselves out to be self important- why is there a mirror here? But there is truth to all criticism.

And there’s a kernel of truth in the best lies- they’re still LIES.

Not to mention the video you mentioned here (which I am assuming is Hbomberguy’s) pulls the SAME SHIT it calls out. Like say...decrying critics pesonally attacking the writers...while proclaiming Jaune and Neptune as self inserts even though Miles AND Kerry is on the record saying that at least Jaune isn’t written by his voice actor.

I'm currently learning about Branding and how important it is to know your audience. Take self.care breaks, talk with someone you trust. Someone who isn't Miles or Kerry! If your reading this. An outside perspective can help. The reason I say that is because if you two constantly talk to each other you're going to end up in an echo chamber. TALK TO FIONA! She's literally your target audience!

Because hey, a man who contradicts himself numerous times and made personal attacks on the creators that only the most malicious and self righteous do is SOOOO trustworthy right? 

Remember that tweet Hbomb brought up in his video as an example of criticism the creators should listen to? The one that demanded Miles get back to work and tried to use the catchphrase of his dead friend to manipulate him?

What a fucking target audience.

I know they mentioned ‘Fiona’ (likely the character’s voice actress) but there’s a supposed fan, one that pretty much sums up the critics, and a perfect example why it gets tossed out.

Moving on, the other video validated something I wish it didn't. "The White Fang Problem" brought to light something I knew was there but either ignored or I wasn't thinking. The White Fang has always made me a little uncomfortable. As a minority, it didn't translate well in my head. The minority are the bad guys. The Civil rights group were the bad guys. I brushed it off for a long time but after that video I couldn't.

Ah huh. So uh, the existence of Blake, Ghira, Kali, Sun, Illa, Velvet, Neon ect. is just incovienable to you huh? And don’t give me that ‘But civil rights group!’- The first episode had them break up a peaceful protest and it’s repeatedly hammered home that the current White Fang doesn’t give a SHIT about equal rights. And no, that concept is not racist- Judging from a story I read, that happened to the New Black Panthers in REAL LIFE.

It became a moral issue. Watching RWBY became a moral issue. RWBY is still pushing right wing talking points.-

Being right of you is not right wing, Especially given how you just acted.

I dont believe Miles and Kerry are racist. I do believe that Miles and Kerry both hold skewed beliefs in what right and wrong is.

Projection.

The way Miles and Kerry treat self defense and protest shows that they know nothing about being Black. They didn't do their research. They didn't talk to minorities about how they were being portrayed. They simply believed that they were right and we were wrong.

Ah huh, ah huh, ah huh-

Monty wrote the White Fang this way. You know, the ASIAN man of FOUR NATIONALITIES. So uh, congrats on saying at the absolute most- Nothing.

Now these two videos are old news. They've been posted on this very same subreddit. But you can't go around and say how much of a progressive and open minded individual you are when the fact that RWBY is a racist show and treats minorities very badly. So no one talks about them.

Or that, as I showed: these videos are bullshit.

Also its kinda homophobic too, not because of Bumblby but because despite Tera and Saphorn being a happy married couple they never kiss on screen. Have you seen happy married couples? Have you seen gay happy married couples? They literally do nothing but kiss. Its cute and adorable and deserves to be spread as far and wide. Despite the show having two straight couple kisses, granted one was in Volume but still, they couldn't get the married couple to kiss? Just saying.

... And not all gay couples are the same, even if I’m sure you’re thinking of TEENAGERS.

You know, judging people based on a preconcieved notion (AKA stereotyping) is pretty fucking bigoted itself...

Watch people be in the comments typing away that this isn't a romance show and how I shouldn't expect romance in an action adventure show despite the long list of evidence to the contrary.

Ah yes, that long list of ONE kiss by a TORPEDOED SHIP.

Such convincing rhetoric.

So you can see I was not coming into Volume 8 with my rose colored glasses. I'm sure many of you hate me because of all my comments, but I don't care. I was ready to leave RWBY. I didn't care. RWBY had taken up so much of my life but I don't care. I was not going to support a show that didn't improve.

Ah huh-

You just came in with jade-colored glass and accepted anything that validated you instead of questioning yourself. You talk about branding but that’s ALL you’ve branded yourself as.

So I watched. And something happened. Something strange. RWBY was moving in a direction I didn't expect it to. Oscar got what he deserved. The Heros were oblivious to the danger that is Salem. Things were headed in the direction that would change the characters forever. It'll be just like Beacon but better. And then they had to ruin it.

Oh we are about to get some real bullshit.

Oscar somehow convinces Hazel to betray Salem. What could have been an avenue to a multi season story arc for Oscar that included the stories villains became a shitty uninspired redemption arc. Kill me.

No he didn’t and this has been something hinted at since Volume 4.

There's still hope for the season but at this point I lost all hope. 

This is the scene that killed Volume 8 for me. Oscar should not be the one who defeats Salem. In fact he should be an avenue to learn more about the villains. He served his purpose with the heroes, now he has a new arc with the villains. Oscar doesn't turn evil, but he's like a conscious. Salem doesn't want to kill him because he can be useful in finding the last remaining relics and maidens.

Assumptions.

Oscar has a heart to heart with all the villains including Salem. Oscar learns to be his own man and accepts he's now one with Ozma but he doesn't have to be another Ozma. He doesn't have to make the same decisions.

Its a great Arc for Oscar. It also makes sense for his character. Ozma feels Salem is pure evil but Oscar can learn for himself.

Headcanon.

But they won't do that. Instead they're going to take the easy way out. Like always.

Bias getting in the way.

Miles and Kerry love wrapping up each season in a little bow. This is why RWBY is so okay.

They say as every RWBY Volumes ends in a cliffhanger.

This is Beacon but if Miles and Kerry thought that RWBY should still be in Beacon. This is Beacon but without major character death. This is Beacon but the main villain loses because the heroes can't lose. Cinder isn't threatening. None of the villains are. Salem is in a Grimm! She should know everything! Why is there no creativity? Why is she not an over powered mess in A GRIMM!? Her own domain?! Why are the writers writing her not as a powerful goddess reaffirming her as a threat but as a human being. Yes I know what that sounds like but hear me out.

‘None of the villains are threatening!’

‘WHY IS THE MAIN VILLAIN NOT BEING TREATED AS THREATENING LIKE I THINK SHE IS!’

‘Why is there no creativity?’

‘DO THE MOST UNCREATIVE THING POSSIBLE!’

How about I keep mocking you?

If Salem can be out smarted by a 10 year old boy, why did it take Ozma so long to defeat her? Oscar should fail. RWBY should fail. They should go through character arcs that help them better understand Salem. Because that's how you defeat Salem.

Pushing your own thoughts onto the show. Also assumptions AGAIN.

I always believed that Ozma and Salem are very similar to Ruby and Weiss. Yes I know how it sounds but it makes sense.-

Too bad your AU fanfic doesn’t matter.

But they won't. Miles and Kerry will use Oscar to defeat Salem. Why? Who knows at this point. I dont know why Miles and Kerry keep pushing Oscar into the spotlight. Its exactly how they treated Jaune Pre-Volume 7. Jaune had to be the focus so often we hated him. And they're doing it again with Oscar

Ah huh. You know, the whole NOTHING Jaune did in Volume 6 was SOOO spotlight stealing, along with his REMOVAL FROM THE CAST FOR SEVERAL EPISODES.

Wanna bet this is another case of ‘penis on screen, me hate’?

They refuse learn and they refuse to improve. If Volume 8 doesn't improve im leaving RWBY. It doesn't matter to any of you. I'm saying it more for myself. So I don't continue with a show that constantly disappoints me. But more so, I don't support a show that views people like me as lesser. If the writing improves it proves that they can grow and get better but if it doesn't it means they will continue to treat Faunus as misguided and horrible characters. And I refuse to support a show that uses my likeness to get brownie points from people who are unaffected by such messages.

A. No, that’s who refused to do self reflection and improve.

B. Should have done that in the first place.

C. No, once again- You blind yourself from the shit that disproves you.

D. You heard him- Treat the Fanaus like shit and make the humans in the right. You know, the opposite what the show is doing now since it’s SOOO horrible.

E. You are not the center of the universe.

[arpmemething2]

Sherlock starter sentences

Send one for my muse’s reaction

"I wrote my own version of the Nativity when I was a child, "The Hungry Donkey". It was a bit gory, but if you're going to put a baby in a manger you're asking for trouble."

"I was just playing the game."

"I can't make bricks without clay."

"I play the violin when I'm thinking and sometime I don't talk for days on end. Would that bother you?"

"You were thinking.  It's annoying."

"Oh, hell! What does that matter? So we go round the Sun! If we went round the Moon, or round and round the garden like a teddy bear, it wouldn’t make any difference."

"Not important? It's primary school stuff! How can you not know that?"

"I'm not a hero, I'm a high-functioning sociopath!  Merry Christmas!"

"What's the point in being clever if you can't prove it?"

"And exactly how many times did he fall out the window?"

"There was once a merchant in the famous market at Baghdad. One day he saw a stranger looking at him in surprise and he knew that the stranger was Death. Pale and trembling, the merchant fled the marketplace and made his way many, many miles to the city of Samarra, for there he was sure Death could not find him. But when at last he came to Samarra, the merchant saw, waiting for him, the grim figure of Death. “Very well,” said the merchant. “I give in. I am yours. But tell me, why did you look surprised when you saw me this morning in Baghdad?”, “Because,” said Death, “I had an appointment with you tonight – in Samarra.”"

"And we're having quite a lot of sex."

"You are a living, breathing man. You've lived a life; you have a past."

"Look at them. They all care so much. Do you ever wonder if there's something wrong with us?"

"I've always been able to keep myself distant. Divorce myself from feelings. But you see, body's betraying me. Interesting, yes? Emotions... grit on the lens, the fly in the ointment."

"Look, this is a six. There's no point in my leaving the flat for anything less than a seven, we agreed. Now go back, show me the grass."

"What a couple of lightweights! You couldn’t even make it to closing time!"

"She provides, shall we say, "recreational scolding" to those who enjoy that sort of thing and are prepared to pay for it."

"Sex doesn't alarm me."

"No idea why people think you’re incapable of human emotion."

"Careful! Some of those skulls are over two hundred thousand years old! Have a bit of respect!"

"You ripping my clothes off in a darkened swimming pool. People might talk."

"Down girl."

"Don't talk out loud.  You lower the IQ of the whole street."

"That's not what people normally say."

"Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically?"

"I've got a better question: is everyone I've ever met a psychopath?"

"Kill you? Um, no. Don't be obvious. I mean, I'm gonna kill you anyway, someday. I don't want to rush it, though. I'm saving it up for something special. No no no no no, if you don't stop prying... I'll burn you. I will burn... the heart out of you."

"No, I just said that in one of your stories."

"You think he lost a lot of money? Suicide is common among city boys."

"He will outlive God trying to have the last word."

"Listen, what I said before, I meant it. I don't have friends; I've just got one."

"I'm not dead.  Let's have dinner."

"So he'll have to make a speech in front of people. There will be actual people there actually listening."

"Don't make people into heroes. Heroes don't exist, and if they did, I wouldn't be one of them."

"Stop talking, it makes me aware of your existence."

"This is my game face.  And the game is on."

"Oh, I may be on the side of the angels... but don't think for one second that I am one of them."

"We solve crimes. I blog about it, and he forgets his pants. I wouldn't hold out too much hope."

“Do you always carry handcuffs?”

"When I say run … run!"

"He’s planned something, something long-term. Something that would take effect if he never made it off that rooftop alive. Posthumous revenge. No, better than that – posthumous game."

"Intuitions are not to be ignored. They represent data processed too fast for the conscious mind to comprehend."

"You can't arrest a jellyfish."

"Brainy is the new sexy."

"Taking your own life. Interesting expression - taking it from who? Once it's over, it's not you who'll miss it. Your own death is something that happens to everybody else. Your life is not your own. Keep your hands off it."

"Oh, I'm sure something will turn up. A nice murder. That'll cheer you up."

"So what if there are right? They are always right, it's boring."

"We all have a past. Ghosts. They are the shadows that define our every sunny day."

"Is it nice not being me? It must be so relaxing."

"Once the idea exists, it cannot be killed."

"It's not a pleasant thought. I have this terrible feeling from time to time that we might all just be human."

"Friends protect people."

I'm not implying anything. I'm sure she came round for a nice little chat, and just happened to stay over. And I assume she scrubbed your floors, going by the state of her knees."

"The universe is rarely so lazy."

"Everybody dies. It’s the one thing human beings can be relied upon to do."

"I gave you my number. I thought you might call"

"Really hope you don't have a baby in here."

"How did he recognize her from.. not her face?"

"I'm suddenly realizing I probably owe you some sort of an apology."

"I always hear "punch me in the face" when you're speaking, but it's usually subtext."

"People don’t really go to heaven when they die. They’re taken to a special room and burned."

"We've got a serial killer on our hands. Love those, there's always something to look forward to."

"Dear God.  What is it like in your funny little brains?  It must be so boring."

"Fear is wisdom in the face of danger. It is nothing to be ashamed of."

"To a great mind, nothing is little."

"I was thinking more about our imminent and daring escape."

"Fine. We'll start with the riding crop."

"Pass me your revolver. I have a sudden need to use it."

"No, no, NO! Of course he's not the boy's father! Look at the turn-ups on his jeans!"

"Dear Lord, I have never been so impatient to be attacked by a murderous ghost...!"

"What I'm trying to say is that, if there's anything I can do, anything you need, anything at all, you can have me.…"

"Look at those cheekbones. I could cut myself slapping that face. Would you like me to try?"

"I would have you right here on this desk until you begged for mercy, twice"

"Are you wearing any pants?"

"When he was dying, he was always cheerful. He was lovely. Except when he thought that no one could see. I saw him once. He looked sad."

"Does yours rub off too?"

"I'm in shock. Look, I've got a blanket!"

"Get out.  I need to go to my mind palace."

"The world is woven from billions of lives, every strand crossing every other. What we call premonition is just movement of the web. If you could attenuate to every strand of quivering data, the future would be entirely calculable. As inevitable as mathematics."

"You should put that on a t-shirt."

"I'm soooo changeable. It is a weakness with me, but to be fair to myself, it is my only weakness."

"Every fairy tale needs a good old-fashioned villain. You need me or you're nothing — because we're just alike, you and I. Except you're boring. You're on the side of the angels."

"Just once, can you two behave like grown-ups?"

"Sentiment is a chemical defect found on the losing side."

"None of the cabs would take me."

"Also, your loss would break my heart."

"I can open any door, anywhere with a few tiny lines of computer code. No such thing as a private bank account now. All are mine. No such thing as secrecy. I OWN secrecy. Nuclear codes? I could blow up NATO in alphabetical order. In a world of locked rooms, the man with the key is king. And honey, you should see me in a crown."

"And you read my writing upside down. You see what I mean?"

"London. It’s like a great cesspool into which all kinds of criminals, agents and drifters are irresistibly drained. Sometimes it’s not a question of who, it’s a question of who knows."

"You've gone all croaky, you getting a cold?"

"All lives end. All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage"

"I hope you'll be very happy. You deserve it. After all, not all people you fall for can turn out to be sociopaths."

"Is that a British Army Browning L9A1 in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?"

"...Murder. Sorry, did I say murder? I meant to say marriage. But, you know, they're quite similar procedures when you think about it. The participants tend to know each other and it's over when one of them's dead."

"That's clever.  Is it clever?  Why is it clever?"

"Interesting thing a tuxedo. Lends distinction to friends and anonymity to waiters."

"If I wasn't everything you think I am, everything that I think I am... would you still want to help me?"

[horansqueen]

You & Me : chapter 4

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.1k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: i hope you guys arent getting bored. id loooove your feedback! please! you give me so much of it these days and i appreciate it so so much soooo dont stop? thank you!!

Chapter 4 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I was not even sure I meant it when I told Niall there was no 'us' anymore. The truth was, there would always be something between us, something life changing, something deep that would probably end up scarring both of us. When he got out of the cafe and lost it in front of me, I thought he was going to say something to me. I was not sure what I wanted to hear, or what I expected to hear, but no matter what it was, he hadn't said it and the way I was disappointed was not normal.

The problem was not the feelings, it was not the lack of love. Every time my eyes would meet his, I felt something stir inside me. When he put his big and warm hands on my cheeks to cup my face, it made my whole body throb. No, love was not the problem because I loved Niall. I've loved him since I was six, and the feeling only grew with the years and exploded when we were together. I never stopped loving him after he broke up with me, and I still loved him. It seemed even stronger now that he was back in my life. No, the problem is that I don't trust him anymore. The problem is that he broke me, he betrayed me, and he lied to me. I believed all his promises and he didn't keep them. I put my trust in him and he broke it. Even just being his friend again was tough for so many reasons.

"In the loune again?"

I blinked a few times, turning to the voice, and chuckled a bit when I saw Louis staring at me.

"The word is 'lune'. You need to learn how to pronounce it."

He sent me an annoyed smile and raised his middle finger at me, making me laugh before I blew him a kiss. Louis put a cup of coffee in front of me and sat at the table to face me with his own cup. He stared at me in silence for a few seconds before licking his lips.

"You're thinking about Niall, aren't you?"

I sighed but didn't dare to look up in his eyes. I was always impressed when Louis found out exactly how I felt or what I thought about but the truth was, I was not so tough to read if you really took the time to study me. Of course I was thinking about Niall, what or who else would I be so pensive about?

"Did you ever tell Eleanor about you and i?"

Slowly, he put his cup down and I could feel his eyes burning me. It took me a while but I finally looked up and he reached for my hand, sliding his arm my way on the table. His fingers grabbed mine and I held my breath. Somehow, I wanted it to remain a secret, something only me and him knew, but at the same time, I knew how close he was to Eleanor and how dangerous that kind of secret could be.

"Yea, I did." he finally admitted in a low tone. "Does that hurt you?"

I blinked a few times and licked my lips before swallowing hard. No, it didn't really bother me, and I wanted to tell him, but I just shook my head a bit and pressed my lips together.

"How did she forgive you? How do you forgive something like that?" I asked, feeling a lump in my throat. "She lets you live here, with me?"

Louis sighed and moved back on his seat, letting go of my fingers to take an other sip of his coffee.

"El knows I love her, and that I wouldn't risk losing her again." he just explained. "She knows my friendship with you is important, too. She forgave me for breaking her heart when I left her, and she gave me her heart again, and her trust, and she knows I won't do anything that could make me lose her again."

It made sense. It made so much sense that I felt myself tear up and closed my eyes. Could I trust Niall again? I didn't even know why I was asking myself this question. After all, I was getting married to a wonderful man, who loved me a lot and made sure I was happy. Why would I want to fall back into a toxic relationship with Niall? I felt my heart jump in my chest as my heart answered this question by itself. Because Niall was my soulmate, that was why.

"Look, Olivia, I could tell you that Niall's an asshole for what he did to you, I could tell you that you deserve better and that you shouldn't risk it again because you've suffered enough... but that would be so hypocrite of me, you know?" he let out in a soft tone. "Just.. do the thing that ensures that you won't wake up at 80 and regret your decisions, no matter what decision it is."

We remained a few minutes in silence, just drinking our coffee, and when I got up, I grabbed Louis' cup and put it in the sink with mine. I was stressed and confused and all I really wanted was to go in my room, lock the door and hide myself under the blankets to be away from the world.

"Oh yea, hey!" Louis let out a bit louder. "It's your radio interview today! When are you leaving?"

As if on cue, my phone started ringing and I grabbed it, answering it quickly.

"Hey babe, i'm in your driveway."

I laughed a bit and tilted my head with a smile.

"You know you can text me, you don't have to call me." I pointed out. "Or just honk a few times."

"That's not how my mommy raised me. Besides, I wanted to hear your voice."

I rolled my eyes but my smile got bigger.

"I'll be next to you in a minute, you could have waited."

"Mm no, can't do." he joked with a laugh, making me laugh too. "Come on, or we'll be late, love you."

"Mm, love you too."

We said goodbye and it's only when I hung up that I noticed Louis doing kissy noises near me. I turned around and pressed my hand on his face, pushing on it lightly and making him laugh.

"Was Dylan or Niall?"

My eyes got bigger and my lips parted as he stared at me. His lips curled more and more into a smirk with each second and I shook my head.

"Shut up!"

He laughed more and walked closer to me, turning me around by my shoulders and pushing me until the front door. He handed me my sweater as I was putting my shoes on and raised his eyebrows. The fact that he knew which sweater I would bring or just that I would bring one even if it was warm outside made me smile but it faltered slightly when I remembered that it used to be something Niall would have done.

"Okay, good luck, my queen."

"I thought that brought bad luck?"

He chuckled low. "Break a leg, then." he said before frowning. "What do you say in french?"

"Merde."

"Isn't that the world for 'shit'?"

I laughed and nodded before shrugging and wrapping my arms around his shoulders. He hugged me back, leaning his chin on my shoulder and I closed my eyes. I needed this, I needed someone to take me close and hug me tight. I needed the comfort Louis could give me, and the way he squeezed me against him made me feel a bit better.

"You'll do great. Don't let them intimidate you, okay?"

I pulled away and nodded as he bumped his fist on my shoulder.

"Merde!"

I laughed and opened the door only to see Dylan waving at me with a smile. I quickly rushed to his car, turning around once to wave goodbye to Louis. After I was seated, Dylan leaned to kiss me and I closed my eyes when I felt his warm lips against mine. There was no doubt that I loved him, but I couldn't stop myself from thinking about Niall. I thought I was fine without him but clearly, I was lying to myself. Now that he was back in my life, he wouldn't leave my mind.

"Okay, you just stay yourself, and it'll go amazingly." Dylan suggested with a smile after he parked. "Are you sure you don't want me to go there with you?"

I breathed in and licked my lips as I shook my head. "No, i'll be fine." I just said, mostly trying to convince myself. "Thanks for the ride."

I grabbed his face with both hands and kissed him hard, making him chuckle against my mouth. It's not that I didn't want him to come with me, in fact, I really wanted it, but I thought it was better if I went alone. I had worked on myself a lot in the past year and one of the things I wanted to achieve was to do things by myself. Of course, it was scary at first, but it didn't mean it was impossible. I wanted to do my first radio interview by myself and I knew I could do it. I didn't need anyone.

"If you need a ride home, you call me okay?"

I let my eyes roam on his face and ran my thumb on his bottom lip, making him smile very slightly. He was so pretty, and so caring, and I suddenly realized how lucky I was.

"Mmhm, thank you."

I could feel my heart hit my rib cage and echo all over my body, making my head throb, as I walked inside. Until I sat down with the earphones, I could feel my hands get sweaty and wiped them on my jeans but it's really when I saw one of the radio hosts enter that I nearly threw up. I recognized her, it was the woman who gave Niall her phone number when she interviewed him. How the fuck didn't I know that she moved here too?

"Hello darling, it's been a while."

I sent her an awkward smile and nodded. I hated the way she talked to me and if I had the strength, I would have just turned around and ran away. But I was stronger than that, right?

"So, you already know how it works, we'll just present you, ask you questions, put a few tunes, and ask more questions." she explained quickly. "Alright?"

I just nodded, not thinking about anything to say or ask. My mind was blank and I just swallowed hard, squirming nervously on my chair.

"As promise, we're here today with the writer of the new Netflix sensation, hello Olivia, how do we pronounce your last name?"

I smiled at the man who presented me and licked my lips, trying to forget my sweaty hands and how hard my heard was beating.

"Fontaine."

"That's french isn't it?"

"Mmhm, yes."

I glanced at the girl but she was just looking at her notes and I couldn't hide that I was nervous to find out what kind of questions she would ask me. Suddenly, I wanted this interview to be over, or have never happened, but I was stuck here and couldn't do anything about it.

"Basically, you're from France, you moved to Ireland, then lived in England and now, you're here, in Cali."

My lips parted and i nodded. "That's... correct." I let out with a chuckle.

"Let's talk about the theme of your tv show, we all know by now that Louis Tomlinson wrote it and sings it, how did you manage to do that?"

I smiled and shrugged. "I just asked him and he said yes."

"So you kept in touch with Niall's friends after you two broke up?"

I felt my heart twist in my chest and turned to the woman, trying to keep my cool.

"Yea, Erika, I did, we kept in touch, I mean we live together." I just pointed out with a shrug, making her eyes open wide in surprise. "We're close friends."

"Did he write it himself or did you help him?" I turned to Damien, the co-host, and sent him a grateful smile.

"I gave him carte blanche." I admitted. "He's super talented and can definitely write and sing, there was no reason for me not to trust him."

I was not going to say that on the radio, but I trusted Louis with my life. I was so grateful he had accepted to do that, especially because I knew he was busy with the writing of his album. The fact that he took the time to help me meant a lot.

"How did the idea came to you?"

I breathed in, happy that this part of the interview was actually about my tv show. Those were easy questions for me. We chatted a bit about when the second season would come out, who would be in it, if i'd have special guests, and if I could give a few spoilers about what would happen.

"So you're marrying Dylan O'Brien this summer, the guy who plays your boyfriend in the series, is it hard to play love on screen with someone you're dating?"

"Not for us, no, I don't think so. I mean, we're both busy, he's leaving to film a movie soon, and we're not together 24/7, so it was actually nice because we could get to see each other more. Also, an other perk, I had a ride every morning and evening."

Damien laughed and I smiled more. I wasn't as nervous as I was when I walked in but I kept playing with the fabric of my pants and couldn't pretend I was not impatient for all this to end.

"Niall turned out to be a very handsome lad, are you mad sometimes that you're not dating him anymore?"

My jaw dropped and I stared at Erika, feeling my face turning red suddenly, but I didn't know if it was because of anger, or embarrassment. I glanced down at my hands and licked my lips, trying to find a way to answer this without being too rude but also without letting her get the best of me or make me feel bad.

"Niall was always handsome, but that's not why I was with him." I said gently, twisting my fingers under the table to make sure I'd keep my cool. "He's a good man, and he's talented, smart and kind. He was my best friend so we were very close and, yea, it just didn't work."

There was a short moment of silence until Damien spoke up, trying to get rid of the awkwardness and for that, I was extremely grateful.

"We're going to listen to Louis Tomlinson's newest single, 'Miss You', and we'll be back right after!"

The song started and I smiled when I heard Louis' voice but still took one of my earphone off my ear, putting it right behind on my head, just in time to see Damien bend down slightly near his co-host and frown.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked in a whisper but slightly rudely, making her roll her eyes.

I licked my lips  and tilted my head, trying to catch their attention and when Erika turned to me, I sent her an annoyed smile.

"No more questions about Niall." I let out firmly, my eyes never leaving hers.

Her lips parted and we stayed like that just staring at each other for a while until Damien turned off the music and started talking again.

"Okay, we have someone on the line who's got a question for you Olivia." he said, making my heart skip a beat. "Hello, what's your question?"

"Hey, I was just wondering if we could ask her a few questions about her tv show instead to ask about her ex boyfriend? No one cares about that, we want to know what she has planned for season 2 and stuff like that."

My lips curled and I bit my bottom one to contain the smile. Erika's eyes found mine and after a few seconds, I think she realized who was actually the caller but she decided not to say anything. I gripped my phone in my pocket, fighting the need to send him a quick text message. I didn't want anyone to ask me who I was texting and just licked my lips.

"Thank you." I answered with a smile. "It's nice to know some people are interested in the show."

Damien cleared his throat and turned to look at me.

"Alright then, we'll take a few questions from you guys at home, so go ahead and call."

                                                  -----

The bar was crowded but surprisingly, the music wasn't as loud as it normally is. Louis put both his hands on my shoulders as we walked to the table and I turned my head slightly his way, feeling his warm breath on my cheek.

"Did I mention how good you sounded in your interview?"

I chuckled and let my eyes roam on his face as we stood next to our friends and finally, I turned around and wrapped my arms around him to hug him. He pulled me closer and squeezed me tight for a few seconds, making me tear up. It had been a long day, the stress was finally leaving me, and it felt good.

"Yes, about three times, but thank you, it makes me feel better."

When I moved away from Louis and turned around to sit at the table, my eyes met Niall's and my lips immediately curled. He was staring at me without shame and didn't even try to look away. I licked my lips and bit my bottom one as we kept looking at each other until Louis put a glass of wine in front of me and took his seat back next to me. I wanted to get up and sit next to Niall to talk with him but I was scared of how my friends would react. I knew that thinking they would think something was happening between Niall and I only proved that it was what I thought myself but I couldn't help it. It was in the way he was looking at me, and the way it made me feel. It fucked me up and I didn't know what to do.

We all chatted and laughed all together for a while, but I kept glancing at Niall and he did the same. I didn't know how I felt about that but it made something stir in my stomach. Maybe it was only the memories of us that made me feel like this but I was not sure what to do with it.

My eyes roamed around the table only to see Julie, Liam, Harry and his new girlfriend (whom's name I couldn't remember) in deep conversation while Louis and El were whispering and smiling at each other with their faces really close. I just got up without thinking and walked to the bathroom but when I got out, I was surprised to see Niall in the hall, leaning against the wall and waiting for me. He pushed himself off the wall when he noticed me and turned to face me. I let my eyes roam on his face as he kept his hands in his pockets, just staring down at me and in that moment I could swear he was going to kiss me.

"You did very well in your radio interview." he finally said, his lips curling more. "I'm sorry they tried to make this about me."

I shrugged a shoulder and smiled back at him. "It's alright, you're more interesting and famous than me."

"It was that annoying girl, yea?" he asked, making me glance down before looking up in his eyes. "The girl that gave me her phone number when we went to that radio interview? I'm surprised she moved here, too."

I wanted to ask him if he had sex with her, or if he had planned to after he broke up with me, but I didn't dare. I was scared of his answer and of how it would affect me. I'd feel guilty if I felt relieved that he didn't, and i'd feel guilty if I felt angry and hurt that he did. Not knowing seemed like the best option.

"She was being a bitch, I swear." I chuckled, making him chuckle too.

"I know, I heard." he scratched the back on his head and I held my breath. "I'm sorry about that."

"But hey, someone called to tell her off, so that was nice." I just added, my lips curling even more.

"Yea, I heard that too."

I tilted my head and stared at him some more as my smile turned into an amused one. I was grateful that this man had been in my life for so long, and even more grateful that he was there again.

"Thank you for calling and telling her off, Nee."

He sent me a fake surprised look and smiled even more before shrugging and shaking his head.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Without thinking, I threw myself in his arms and it took him only a second to hug me back. I felt his stubble scratch gently my cheek and he pulled me even closer as I remained on my tiptoes. The problem was, I didn't want to let go of him. Maybe it was the alcohol running in my veins, or just the gratitude of what he had done for me, but either way, it felt good to be close to him.

"Thank you." I repeated in a whisper, closing my eyes as his scent invaded me.

I felt intoxicated by him and I swallowed hard.

"You're welcome, petal." he murmured, making my heart skip a beat. "I told you, I'll always be there for you."

I held my breath at the promise he made when we were still together and felt myself tear up. We were happy together, and although we both had flaws that generated problems, we loved each other and it felt good. I wish love was all we needed, it would be so much easier.

We pulled away but remained close from each and when his hand moved slowly to push a lock of my hair away from my face, I held my breath again. His fingers lingered on my jaw and I felt his thumb brush my lip and my eyes fluttered but I quickly took a step back and cleared my throat.

"Oh I didn't tell you, but I love you as a brunette!" I let out randomly, trying to move past that awkward yet emotional moment we just had. "Hadn't seen you with your natural hair color since you were what, 10?"

"More like 12." he let out with a chuckle as I nodded.

"You look good." I added sincerely, sending him a fond smile.

I knew he wanted to say something about what had happened between us just a few seconds before but I didn't want to hear it. Being so confused around him made me feel like shit. We were both taken and even though the connection we used to have together was slowly coming back (I could feel it), I didn't want to let this go too far.

"We should go back." I proposed low, making his smile falter a little before he nodded.

He turned around to leave and quickly, I sent a text message to my boyfriend, asking him to come and join us. I wanted him to be there and remind me why I was with him. Not because I couldn't remember, but because being so close to Niall fucked me up in a way I couldn't explain and brought back all these feelings to the surface. It felt like we were never apart. It felt like we were alone in the world.

I was fine a few days ago, I was happy. But without even knowing it, Niall came back in my life and changed everything. I didn't want to trust him, and I didn't want to give him an other chance. I was way too scared of what he could do to me again. But I also couldn't deny how much I loved him.. how much I would always love him.