#and stare at Helly the whole time

[rayvern-sheep]

I feel like i need to rewatch the first 3 episodes of season 2 again w/ this new info…

Or is this just smthn that was going on for this one episode. Cos istg…

[hoodlessmads]

The balls and attentiveness and care of Irving B to be like “Helly R would NEVER SAY THAT TO ME” and go on a rampage to get his friend back, while Dylan and Mark didn’t even notice that “Helly” was obviously not herself based not only on her weird behavior but specifically on her fucked up comments to Irv

Irving B was my hero in this ep

Also his insistence on outing Helena was giving the same energy as those scenes in The Talented Mr. Ripley.

Tell me this isn’t the exact same energy Irving is giving Helena in this episode while she’s busy spouting some bullshit.

Also (can’t find a gif of it) the scene in Ripley where Marge first figures it out and yells at Tom, “Dickie swore he would NEVER TAKE OFF THIS RING.” Same energy as Irving telling Helena that Helly was never cruel. (If you haven’t seen this movie you should watch it but that’s besides the point.)

This episode is so insane.

-innies waking up in the middle of the snowy wilderness with creepy animatronics of themselves and fake twin masturbation scripture

-Helena’s…..everything

-Irving serving cunt from start to finish and being willing to murder Helena Eagan for hurting his friends, knowing that Helly would approve, but instantly clutching Helly to his chest as soon as she’s back and profusely apologizing for hurting her

-Helly being so overwhelmed and disoriented and having no fucking clue what’s going on and being terrified but instantly knowing that she’s safe because Irving is holding her and leaning into him and then watching him die for her two seconds later with no context I NEED TO CHEW ON GLASS

-Helena taking her war against Helly to a new level, in revenge for trying to hang her and sabotage her company and make her dad hate her, Helena goes and fucks Helly’s boyfriend using Helly’s body (I know it’s much more nuanced than, forgive me, but that’s essentially how it’s going to feel from Helly’s perspective) and just wow HOLY SHIT Helena is such a freak I’m obsessed with her

-Helena’s weird obsession with Mark and her hatred of Helly but her genuine ridicule of the dumb masturbation story to the point where Milchick just stares at her unamused but at the same time she leaves the tent with Mark in the morning just to go lovingly admire the legendary Dieter waterfall and her freaky sad attempts to connect with Irv by gifting him with a weird snow seal which don’t land whatsoever and her sad need for a loving father figure but at the same time her unhesitatingly wanton cruelty towards him the second he pushes her boundaries farther than she likes IM CHOKING

-Mark S being such an adolescent boy that he’s willing to overlook Helly being odd and cruel and not herself and even say Irv DESERVED it and now Helly is going to feel extremely hurt and betrayed, not imo because of the sex like everybody seems to think, but because he spent like at least 3 days with Helena and a lot of time real close in that tent and still didn’t even notice that it wasn’t her. Understandable for Mark S because again, he’s essentially in an adolescent state of mind about this romance, he’s never experienced anything like this, but I’d be pissed

-Irving being so fucking smart and badass (he’s obviously not dead for good I refuse to believe that), the numbers on the computer blending into almost but not quite “Helena Eagan”, also everyone in this fandom being so fucking smart and clocking this shit from the very first episode even though I never would have noticed until now otherwise lmao

-Dylan screaming from the top of the cliff “LEAVE HIM ALONE” and Irv saying “hang in there”

-the MDR innies being on the verge of fracturing in this episode, partly because of Helena, but Irv pulls them all back together in the end because of his resourcefulness and sheer love, because he knows that even if he’s lost Burt, he still has his family, and he’s totally okay with dying for them

-Irv screaming at Milchick “BRING HER BACK BRING HER BAAACK” LITERALLY ME THIS WHOLE SEASON IRV

-I love Mark S but god damn he was so useless in this episode

And then this is not even considering the insanity that was LAST episode, including such hits as:

-Mark fucking reintegrating jumpscare

-Kier Eagan blackface

-Dylan’s wife lowkey liking innie Dylan more than her husband and possibly indicating an emotional affair is on the horizon cheating on her husband with her husband

-Felicia’s heartbreaking convo with Irv about Burt

-Harmony Cobel’s entire story in this episode ending either possibly seeing a clone of a dead Eagan CEO??

God damn. I haven’t made a text post in years

[stargirlie-sharon]

Puns and Fun!

a robocar poli oneshot.

[A/N, nothing much, just crack, puns, fun, and puns that have to do with Poli's name :> got this idea from a comment lol. Also, polyamory at the end hehe, try guessing which ship it is]

"Hey. Hey. Heyyyyyy."

"Helly, no. I'm trying to organize Jin's papers for her-"

"I gotta say something important to you tho!"

It was just another day at the Rescue Team HQ, and surprisingly it was pretty peaceful. No accidents happened in Broomstown, and none of the members were dispatched for any emergencies for once. It was the team's lucky day!

Since it was their rare day off, they decided to just relax and do their own thing. And what did Helly decide to do? Annoy the crap out of Poli.

"Alright, what do you want?" Poli asked sternly, annoyed with Helly's nonsense. The robocopter giggled before speaking- "Okay, okay- what do you call Poli if he was a shape?" From the look on Helly's face, it was clear he was trying not to laugh. That took a while for Poli's mind to process.

"...what?" He tilted his head in puzzlement. "What do you call Poli if he was a shape?" Helly repeated himself. This was getting more harder for him to conceal his laughter. "..." It was only until Poli realised what was going on.

"A POLIGON! Get it? As in polygon? *wheeze*" Helly rolled on the ground in laughter as Poli stared at him in unamusement. "...Wow. Helly, wow." He replied sarcastically. "Helly, please get out of this room before I smack you on the head-" "AA-"

...

Timeskip. After that whole ordeal, Jin was discussing about the plan for tommorow's patrol around town with Poli, Roy and Amber. Helly still hasn't arrived yet. It's not exactly an uncommon occurrence for him to be a bit late for certain things.

"I hope you're all enjoying your break, everyone! We just need to have one meeting about tommorow's patrol, and you all can go back to whatever you were doing." The robocars nodded, though a few of them looked a bit less than pleased for a meeting. Amber was completely fine, Roy looked like he just got his nap interrupted by the Rescue Team's speakers as if they were right next to him, and Poli... well, you know. Nonetheless, the three kept up their professional additudes.

"Poli, you'll check around town central. I've heard there have been more signs of littering lately, and Cleany has been working overtime, so if you run into him, lend a hand for him please." "Sounds good!"

"Roy, you patrol in the suburbs. More children have been playing outside more often on the streets, especially Kevin and Doug- meaning that there'll be more of a risk of injuries, so be on the lookout for any kids on the street." "Got it." Roy yawned softly, but not that loudly, just so he doesn't offend Jin.

"And Amber, your destination is the current construction site for the new train station. This project is going to be a big one, and we don't want any construction accidents happening, so remember to bring your first aid kit and make sure it is ready at all times." "Alright. You can count on me!"

"As always, if you see any suspicious activity going around, remember to report it. ..And Helly isn't here yet. Why am I even surprised.." The blonde said out of disappointment, internally getting ready to scold him once he makes his appearance.

"Aha, yeah.. you know he's like this. Well, not always, but it's somewhat typical of him." Roy chuckled softly at Jin's expression of dissapointment and annoyance. "That's true. I guess you're never going to get used to this, aren't you, Jin?" Amber giggled. Just then, as if on cue, Helly burst open the door to the command room where the other rescue members were in. "I'M HERE!" Helly yelled, laughing loudly, as if he just thought of another pun to spew out.

"Oh no.. please, not another pun-" The police car was already tired of Helly's jokes, he looked like he just wanted to do nothing but flop on the couch and sleep. [A/N and... potentially cuddle with roy bcuz they're both tired, maybe with amber too hehe]

"Helly! I swear, this is the fourth time in a week you have been late to another meeting! When will you lear-" Jin scolded. "Hold on! I got a good one!" Helly said those words in between laughter. "A good one? A good what?" She questioned.

"Hehe, okay- just listen." "If Poli, Roy and Amber were in polyamorous relationship, what would their ship name be?"

"wait... HUH-?!" The three of them instantly started blushing. They were clearly flustered and were caught offguard.

"POLIAMROY! As in POLYAMORY!"

Before the three knew it, their faces were flushing quite excessively. The look of pure embarrassment and flusteredness was right in front of Helly and Jin. The way Helly blurted out those words so suddenly just caught them so off guard that they couldn't comprehend any words for a few seconds.

"D-Damn you, Helly...!" Poli was trying to hide his blush with his arms, and then immediately tried to get out of the situation by running out of the room, but just ended up accidentally hitting his face against the wall.

"W-Wha- you- why would you- oh gosh..." Amber's cheeks were more pink than the paint on her. This may have been the most flustered she's ever been- and she's quite adorable too. If she had a thermometer with her now, her temperature would be probably be as high as a fever.

Roy? He just couldn't speak. Yeah, he'd probably need a fire hose to cool him off and reduce the heat he's experiencing from being so flushed.

Helly couldn't stop giggling at their priceless faces. Jin was just astonished, and even felt a little amused by the sight in front of her. She even chuckled a bit. "..Well, this wasn't something I was expecting to see today. Well, our meeting's dismissed, and if you're all still in your flustered state by tommorow, we might have to postpone the patrol, shouldn't we?"

[moonstruckdraws]

When I Caught You Staring... I Realized I Was Staring Too

(original)

(hue shifts)

An illustration of @hellishgayliath's sons, Pico and Bao. Chillin on the bench just staring at each other like frickin dorks, dorks that I love dearly, based on a lil headcanon I made on the Pico board I made for Helli. This is also the first background I've painted this year, and despite being blurred, I'm satisfied to some degree. One of my art goals this year is to draw more backgrounds so ig this is a start lol

I didn't know which setting I liked, so why not show both lol. In all honesty, this image was going to have two themes. The current theme and a second theme with it being daylight and pink trees, some spring and autumn vibes or something. But I don't have the time for that lol, so maybe I'll do it another time.

Helli you picked the WRONG day to post our children interacting. Making me smile and kick my feet, well guess what? I push back with this! I'll admit you surprised me, and I give you a round of applause for that, no a STANDING OVATION, but don't test me! I'm willing to cram out a whole other board if I have to lmao. (but really those were so cool!! My face hurts from smiling at them for so long lmao. Luci looks so cute in your style!! The amount of shenanigan potential in them) I feel like I'm constantly reminded how cool you are lmao

[hannahssimblr]

Chapter Six

I have Deja-vu when I return to the Tullamore stadium where I spent countless Sunday afternoons as a teenager, forced to sit at pitch side as Kelly roared her support for the players with a ferocity that always kind of pissed me off. She wasn’t into sports, not really, she just pretended that she was because she had this fantasy of one of the players spotting her by the barriers and coming over to ask for her number. Of course, none ever did, but eventually, when she was sixteen she talked her way into one of their after parties at the club house and kissed six of them one after the other with the same efficiency as a local politician handing out fliers at a shopping centre. She didn’t get any phone numbers either, just a crusty cold sore that hung around on her lip for two weeks.

Today, for the first time there is no Kelly by my side, and I realise upon entry that it’s been almost four years since I’ve set foot in this place. I don’t know why I thought it’d look different, but everything is the same, from the sun bleached plastic seats to the mud, grass, and leather smell in the air. I’ve changed but all these old places, they stay exactly the same. Claire links her arm with mine and we head down the steps towards our seats near the front. She’s wearing a Tullamore jersey. Most people on our side are too, painting one whole side of the stadium in blue and white. I’m just wearing a grey jumper. I had a matching jersey years ago, in fact I even went to the trouble of digging it out of the bottom drawer of the chest in my childhood bedroom earlier, but it’s girls size 13-14. It won’t even go over my chest anymore. 

“Are you excited?” I say to Claire, who I expect to be beaming, but isn’t. 

“Yeah I suppose.” She says. 

“It’s a bit mad to be here together, isn’t it? Like, how many of these matches would you say you go to?”

“Oh God, like, probably all of them, I’m always stuck in these seats watching him.”

“You’re very supportive.”

“I’m a saint.”

My smile falters a bit, she doesn’t seem excited in the least. When I imagined her coming to these games I always had a picture in my mind of her cheering him on with voracious enthusiasm, hanging over the railings, chanting his name, but by the rather stoic expression on her face today I’m starting to doubt my own assumptions. “Not pushed about the match, no?” 

She sighs. “No, it’s fine, I just… this has been a touchy subject between us lately.”

“Football?”

“It’s how much he wants to play it.”

I frown. “But he’s made it onto the senior team, surely it’s normal that it’ll take up a lot of his time.”

“Yeah it’s just like,  he’s in fourth year in UCD now, I wish he’d just study or something, focus on his degree.”

“Oh.”

“There’s no future in football, like, he’ll never get paid for it and I just don’t want him to throw away his science degree because he’s too caught up with an amateur sport. There’s good money in pharmaceuticals if he works hard enough, and then we could start saving for a mortgage or a wedding, or I don’t know, kids or something.”

I nod, though it’s incredibly weird to hear her talk about such things now, at twenty one years old, when they seem lightyears away for me. A mortgage? I don’t even know how that works, never mind how I’d go about saving for one, but Claire has always been eager to settle. 

“Is he struggling to balance both things?”

“Well, he isn’t really trying to. He’s just not doing his college work.”

“At all?”

She shakes her head. Her mouth becomes a thin line as she stares out over the pitch where the players have begun to filter out, shaking the hands of the other team, and I spot Shane for the first time, dressed in a blue jersey with stripes across his shoulders. He is powerful looking, even amongst all of the others. Two men in Helly Hansen fleeces and caps walk straight through my line of vision and settle into the seats directly in front of us, blocking out the view momentarily. By the time I regain my view of the pitch the players have all settled into their starting positions. 

“I assume you’ve talked about this with him.” I say to Claire. 

“Yeah of course, but I might as well be speaking to a brick wall. You know how he is with talking about things. At all. Ever.”

I hesitate. “He can be a bit withholding, for sure.” 

“Never go out with an Irish man.” She declares. “They’ll only wreck your head.” I want to tell her that men from other countries haven’t been much more straightforward in my experience, but then the whistle blows and the match begins. 

It’s true what they say in the newspapers about Shane Healy. He’s like a bolt of lightning on that pitch. He’s big, he’s quick and he’s aggressive, and yet there is something about his style of play that I didn’t expect to see. He’s like a child out there. The way that he practically skips along with the ball, lobbing it up into his hands and kicking it up the pitch makes it seem like he’s mocking the players around him, the ones who can’t catch him, can’t stop him. 

I watch him possess the ball once again, drop it onto his right foot and neatly slot it through the goalposts for a perfect point. The crowd erupts into euphoric cheers, including me and Claire, who both laugh ourselves onto our feet and start yelling out for him. I’m not close enough to see him smiling, but I know he is, jogging around in a wide circle, clenching his fists in celebration. 

The two men in front of us are muttering about something when we sit back down, and the only reason I tune in is because I hear them say his name. “Healy. Number fifteen. ” I nudge Claire and mutter “They’re talking about your boyfriend there.”

“What are they saying?”

We try to listen in, but the stadium is too loud to catch anything but the odd word. “I can’t hear.” I admit. “Are they Australian? Hardly.” The idea of a person coming all the way from the continent of Oceania to find themselves in a shabby Tullamore stadium, of all places, would be markedly strange. 

“Oh, foreign men?” Claire drawls. “Maybe I should give one of them my number.” She slams her sunglasses onto her face, shielding her eyes from the sharp October sun, and we both put our focus back onto the pitch. 

Beginning // Prev // Next

[women-are-hot]

Shivers (Ona Batlle)

Summary: ona feels like she isn’t enough for y/n, because she have been saying no to sex a few times.

Warnings: fluff, angst, mention of smut.

Note: Okay, so I think this is my favorite fic I’ve ever writed here on Tumblr. Hope you’ll like it.

I had just watched my wonderful girlfriend win against Everton on Old Trafford and I’m a helly proud girlfriend right now!

Ona celebrated a little with her teammates and the fans, afterwards she walked over to me.

“Hey mi amor” she said as she gave me a quick kiss.

“Hi, congrats on the win, babe. You did amazing” I replied, giving her a hug.

“Gracias” Ona said.

“You’re going out with the team tonight to celebrate the win, right?” I asked.

“Yeah. It’s okay, right?” she answered.

“Of course, but I just had to be sure, so I didn’t cook too much food,” I said with a laugh.

“I’m going into the locker room now. Thank you for coming, hermosa. It means a lot” Ona responded, giving me a kiss.

“Of course I came to support you, love. Now go enjoy your win with your friends” I said.

“Thanks” Ona replied, kissing me one last time, before going into the locker room with her teammates.

—

Since Ona was out with her teammates the whole evening, I just cooked some spring rolls and ate them.

Ona came home quite late at 11pm, but I guess she just had a lot of fun with her friends.

“What did you get for dinner?” Ona asked as she sat down beside me on the couch.

“Just some spring rolls” I answered, laying my head on her shoulder.

“Aren’t you tired?” I asked.

“A little, not that much actually,” she answered.

“How can you not be tired after playing 90 minutes and partying?” I asked, looking up at her.

“I don’t know, but we were not partying, babe. We were just chilling and talking” Ona said, taking some of my hair behind my ear.

“But you definitely smell like you had some alcohol” I replied.

“I did have a beer or two,” Ona said with a smirk.

“I knew it. Beer is your weakness” I responded with a laugh.

“Yeah, whatever. I’m taking a quick shower” Ona said, standing up from the couch.

I watched her walk into the bathroom, while I just sighed softly.

Then I got up from the couch and got onto the bed in our bedroom.

—

I had just looked a bit on instagram and then Ona came onto the bed beside me.

Then I put my phone down and put my full attention on Ona.

Ona just laughed softly when I looked at her.

I got a little closer to her and put my head on her chest.

“Did you have a great night without me?” Ona asked me.

“Yeah, but I did miss you,” I answered.

“Cute” Ona whispered, kissing my head.

Then I sat up a bit, so I could give Ona a kiss on her mouth. The kiss started slow and gently, but then it got more heated as I got on top of her.

I took my hands under her shirt, trying to take it off, but then Ona’s hands stopped me and she also stopped kissing me.

“I don’t want to have sex” she said.

“Oh…” I whispered and got down beside her again.

Ona looked at me and I could see that she felt a bit uncomfortable.

“Is okay, right?” she asked.

“Yeah, of course,” I answered as I turned the light off and got comfortable in the bed.

Then it became silent for a few seconds.

“Can you please turn the light off?” I asked as Ona now had just stared at me for who knows how long.

“Yep” Ona answered simply and turned the light off.

“Goodnight” she said, still looking at me.

“Goodnight” I replied, taking her hand in mine, so she didn’t was too uncomfortable, because of saying no to sex.

I gave her hand a gentle kiss and then saw a little smile on Ona’s face, so I hope she wasn't that uncomfortable anymore.

—

It has been around 2 months since the day Ona played at Old Trafford. 

Of course I love Ona, but since that day she hasn’t wanted to have sex with me and fully understand that, that’s not the problem. The problem is that she had acted differently around, both private and in public. I get that she doesn’t want to be super open about her relationship in public, but that she also acts a bit weird in private is making me worried a bit!

Ona had been at training today and just got home, taking a shower.

She hasn’t even said hey to me or anything like that. It feels like she is ignoring me.

I planned to ask her about why she is acting so weird, but I guess I have to wait a bit more.

—

Finally after 1 hour Ona got out of the bathroom door that she had locked.

“Hi babe” I said.

“Hey” she replied, walking into our bedroom.

I followed her and then Ona looked confused at me.

“Something wrong?” she asked, a bit harsh?

“I could ask you the same” I answered, taking a seat on the bed.

“What do you mean? I’m totally fine” she said.

“That’s a lie and we both know it,” I replied.

“Babe, I’m fine, trust me” Ona said, giving me a quick, but loving kiss before leaving the room.

Well, that conversation didn’t go that well…

—

(The next day)

So, today I’m actually going to ask why she has been acting so weird…

Ona had again been at training and went home, only to ignore me while being in shower.

After 1 hour again, she came out of the bathroom.

“Why do you lock the door?” I ask.

“Cause I want some private life” Ona answered, again walking into the bedroom.

I followed her again into the bedroom.

“Ona, why are you acting so weird?” I asked.

“I’m not acting weird. I said yesterday that I was totally fine and I’m still totally fine, Y/n” Ona answered.

“You’re not fine, Ona. You don’t even say hi or anything to me anymore” I said.

“Oh, so that’s what this is about, huh? I’m not giving you enough attention?!” she responded.

“No, that’s not what this is about. Ona It’s abo-” “About what, Y/n? What is this shit about?” Ona suddenly yelled, interrupting me.

I looked at Ona with shocking eyes.

“Seriously, just look at you right now. You’re getting angry, because I ask how you are! Something is clearly wrong and I’m just worried about you, Ona! I’m done with you acting like nothing is going on, when there is clearly something bothering you” I yelled.

Ona stayed silent.

“I’m not going to judge you, Ona. You can tell me anything, you know” I said, taking her hand in mine.

“Is a stupid reason” Ona whispered.

“I don’t care if it’s a stupid reason! It’s bothering you and I don’t want anything to bother my girlfriend” I said.

Ona looked at me with soft eyes.

“It’s because I have been saying no to sex so many times and it just made me feel so guilty, because ever time you just seemed so sad about it and I didn’t wanted to make you feel sad, but I still ended up making you sad. Now you probably think I’m an idiot and you probably don’t even wanna be with my anymore, because I don’t want sex with you” Ona rambled on and on, while I just softly looked at her.

“Are you done?” I asked her.

Ona nodded, quite confused why I would ask her that.

“I have three things to say. 1. Yes, I did feel sad about you saying no to me so many times. 2. I dosen’t matter if we have sex or not. I’m still deeply in love with you. 3. I couldn’t even think about leaving you, Ona. You’re the one for me! I love you so so much and I don’t need sex to know that you do the same for me” I said.

Ona looked at me with a few tears in her eyes. I dried her tears away and hugged her tight.

“I’m sorry” she whispered.

“It’s okay, Ona. Just please next time tell me if something is wrong, okay?” I asked.

Ona nodded softly as she still was hugging me tight.

After a few minutes of hugging, Ona stopped so she could give me a kiss.

“You’re the best girlfriend I could ask for,” Ona said, putting her forehead against mine.

“You’re also the best girlfriend I could ask for,” I replied.

Then Ona gave me a quick kiss and hugged me tight once again...

[sin-tentional]

𝐩𝐚𝐱 𝐦𝐢𝐧 & @fxckingprxblem​ // aw hellies.

Pax wasn’t expected at the shop that afternoon. in fact, he was supposed to be in some other country completely– a tropical destination where he could lounge in salt water with his newly wedded wife. Bryan’s loss had him reeling back into Salem far too early than he wanted to. he’d assured Bryan’s sisters and Johanna that he’d be back to help try to get Bryan to eat something, but he wanted to make sure the shop was in order. the new manager would be placing the inventory order, and Pax, being the owner, wanted to make sure it was sent correctly– but he’s distracted as soon as those front doors opened and he heard the melody playing in the corner of the shop where the piano sits. 

the manager he hired has to ask Pax what’s wrong and shake his shoulder to snap him out of that reverie. even after he does so, Pax keeps one eye on the back of that music shop. even after he’s been lightly pinched into reality, he feels like he’s still walking into a daydream. “Yeah. I’m fine–” his voice doesn’t carry far. the quality in his tone is light, and airy–it’s more soft spoken than usual, and tucked behind aisles of manuscript paper and other music books. “I just wanted to check in–” even as he says it, he must assume that poor manager knows he’s no longer checking in. there is a hand held up to the other as he forgets why he’s come to visit in the first place.

feet carry him towards the playing. his pace matches the adagio melody. the notes on the piano continue their chord progressions, and flourish into a composition he hardly recognizes. though, he’s heard the song before– he’s played it for the individual sitting at the piano. he remembers a head resting upon his shoulder, the scent of him in his senses, the feel of his fingertips upon a set that felt as if they were unteachable. he remembers assuring him that he was everything but– and now he was playing all by himself? curling and trembling fingertips are scared to join Saja at the bench. he sways in the stale air for a moment, as if asking if it’s okay to. though words continue to fail him– he dually doesn’t wish to interrupt the music.

Pax has only had a few relationships to go sour his whole life. there was a point in time where Saja was the only person who mattered. there were mornings he’d convinced himself he’d woken up just to speak that bittersweet good morning, and now staring at that person in front of him feels as if it were lifetimes ago. he gives him a single look– of sympathy, but with eyes on ivory keys, Pax is uncertain if he’s been noticed at all. 

[blasphemyincarnate]

this isn’t necessarily shippy & also kinda canon divergent, as of 15.08; while michael’s in the cage, he can feel when other angels die n shit?? and he could feel when the other archangels were killed, when the angels were cast out of heaven, etc, and that fucked him up pretty badly ??

send me a fic request!

I,,, should not be writing this one before everything else but it’s been a shitty day and i deserve to write some angst

title: cages with see-through walls

alternative title: can you tell gabriel is my favorite archangel

pairing: midam

timeframe: s5 - s14

w/c: 1233

ao3: cages with see-through walls 

They’ve barely been in the Cage nineteen years when it first happens.

Adam and Michael had been sitting across from each other, leaning on opposite walls in the tiny storage closet their space has transformed into. Their silence is punctuated by Sam’s screams and Lucifer’s cackles and-

Adam thought about the girlfriend he had in high school who had an obsession with all things mythology and how she knew so much about Lucifer. He wondered what she would think about his current situation.

That’s what he’d been thinking about, and he’d been in the middle of, -wow if only we could trade places right now, she’d be so fucking into this, probably wouldn’t even notice the helliness of this hell- when Michael’s head snaps up, eyes bright and burning and blue.

Adam wouldn’t have thought anything of it, if the noise from outside hadn’t stopped abruptly as well. Lucifer wasn’t laughing and Sam wasn’t- wasn’t screaming.

“Michael?” Adam chanced, in a whisper. He cleared his throat. God, some water would be nice right now.

The archangel didn’t respond, just stood there with his head cocked to the side ever-so-slightly and a confused, pained expression on his face.

“Michael,” Adam said again. “Is something… is something wrong?”

Maybe we’re getting out of here. No, don’t think about that. Think about, think about Amelie and how much she would’ve loved meeting Lucifer-

Michael stood there, just stood there, for a few minutes. Then he leaned back against the wall and slid down it in a decidedly un-archangelic way. 

“No,” he said. “Everything’s fine.”

Michael was still wearing Adam’s face. The same face Adam had looked into for nineteen years. He knew his own face better than the back of his hand.

Everything was not fine.

–

They don’t talk about it for years. Years and years and years and years and-

-Sam’s gone, why, that’s so fucking unfair-

-years and years and years and-

-he’s doing it again.

Michael is sitting next to Adam with one golden-white wing wrapped gently around the human’s shoulders, when the wing disappears and he practically hurls himself to his feet.

“Michael,” Adam said again. He’s half-asleep and not completely sure what just happened, but something has. Like, like that time. That time, how long ago? Hundreds of hundreds of years.

A long time ago.

Michael starts, he starts making noises. Noises Adam’s not sure an angel should be able to make. He’s crying and screaming and yet somehow so quiet. 

Adam whispers his name and stands up, moving slowly. Michael’s not facing him and the movement doesn’t appear threatening either way, but he does anyways. 

Adam puts a hand on the archangel’s shoulder and they both pretend Michael doesn’t flinch.

“What’s wrong?”

Michael doesn’t say anything for the longest time. Maybe a whole year. At some point, silences that last years begins to feel like hours.

Sometimes Adam isn’t sure if they’ve been in hell 20,000 years or two weeks.

“Michael, please,” Adam says. “Talk to me.”

He does.

He tells Adam about how that first time so long ago, he’d felt his sister die. Raphael. After Lucifer fell and Gabriel disappeared, the only sibling he’d had. 

“She was the only one in my family who was always there,” he whispers in the darkness. Adam holds him a little tighter.

He tells Adam about how he’d felt her fear, her panic, her confusion. That terrible feeling of “something’s wrong” and realizing what it is a moment before it’s too late.

He tells Adam about how her pain had rocketed through his body, how it was all there for just an instant before- nothing.

Before she was gone.

“And just now,” Michael says. He turns to Adam with shattered eyes. “Just now, Heaven fell. Do you know what it’s like, to feel each of your brethren fall from the sky? How their burning wings feel like on your own back? How do you live with the knowledge that their screams will be trapped in your ears forever?”

Adam doesn’t know quite how to respond to that, so he doesn’t. He falls asleep with one of the universe’s deadliest creatures tangled in his arms.

–

Another thousand years pass. Two thousand. Three thousand. Adam stops counting around year eighty thousand two hundred and six.

Michael stumbles back into their room one day - which, for the record, looks the same as it did eighty thousand two hundred and six years ago - with a wild look in his eye.

“Adam,” he says. “Adam, something is wrong. I think-”

He practically collapses on the ground then, fingers digging into the glass debris. A small cut forms on the side of his palm, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Of course he doesn’t. He’s an archangel.

Adam reaches for him, gathers up the broken pieces of the archangel he has, crazily, chosen to love. “What is it?”

Michael stares at him with the same shattered eyes he gets when he thinks too hard about Raphael or the other angels or his father. “I think Gabriel’s dead.”

Adam genuinely doesn’t know what to think. He’d thought Gabriel was already dead, but it’s clearly not the case.

“I thought- sorry, it’s insensitive.” He almost says it out loud. 

“Go ahead,” Michael says dully. “It’s fine.”

“I thought he was already dead.”

The angel shrugs. “I’d heard so, but then, after I felt Raphael- Raphael die, I began to suspect. And now,” he shudders, a full body-shake, “now I know.”

“Tell me about him,” Adam says.

Michael smiles, weakly, and tells Adam how Gabriel had the brightest Grace Michael had seen at the time. “Oh, Lucifer was the Morningstar, and he shone so bright, but when Gabriel was first created- all was golden.”

He tells him about how Gabriel didn’t have a preferred pronoun or a preferred vessel like the rest of the archangels. “The first time she went to Earth - she was she, then - she came skipping back into Heaven and said, ‘I made my own vessel, so I don’t have to use humans. It’s got snappy fingers and everything.’”

He talks and talks and Adam thinks about how he’d heard Gabriel had always been Lucifer’s favorite, and he thinks about that time Michael told him about how Gabriel roped Raphael into her first ever prank, and thinks that being the baby of the family made Gabriel everyone’s favorite.

He wonders why that doesn’t hold true for him.

“They sound wonderful,” he tells Michael instead of what he’s thinking.

Michael smiles bitterly. “They were.”

–

One day, Adam gathers some particularly big and nice pieces of broken glass he finds and places them on a piece of his shirt that came off maybe two hundred years ago. He gathers some smaller, shinier pieces he finds and puts them in a pile between the two.

“It’s not much,” he tells Michael. “But it’s something. A memorial. If you will.”

Michael smiles wistfully and finds a piece of burned glass on the ground that he puts beneath the other pieces. “Lucifer died this morning,” he tells Adam. Almost emotionless, except he’d been gone for almost forty days earlier, and he only ever does that when something bad happens upstairs.

“Guess you’re the last one standing,” Adam says. He stopped wondering if these types of comments were insensitive twenty years ago.

Michael smiles and his voice almost doesn’t shake. “Guess I am.”

–

current status: unedited

[sea-side-scribbles]

Fanfiction: Sympathy For A Downer

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22737214/chapters/55288288

Chapter 7: 

Nick remained on his couch, being all confused, realizing he must’ve completely misjudged the situation. Nobody had ever run away from his approach like this. But now he couldn’t dwell over it, he had to go find his inspiration and he already knew where he would look for it. He even dispraised himself for being so stupid and forgetting about something so obvious. To be fair, it had been a long time ago since he last visited her and he didn’t know if she still knew him. At some point she had simply stopped to visit him and he couldn’t remember if there was something he did to her. Well, he would find out today.

Some time later he ascended a plain stairwell and ringed a bell by an unremarkable door that actually led to a palace of dreams he hadn’t seen from inside for a long time. She didn’t show up, so he ringed again, asking himself if she still lived here. Or perhaps she had another visitor, that was more likely. 

Finally, the door opened and she stood before him, beautiful as always, in her skinny dress, shiny black leather pants and high heels, completed with bright red lipstick: Sally Boyle. She seemed to be a bit out of breath. For a moment she gave him a worried look, then her expression turned into surprise.

„Nick, I haven’t seen you in ages!“

„That’s a bloody shame, isn’t it?“,  he responded, hoping she would agree. To his relieve, she gave a wide smile and said: „You’re damn right baby, come in!“

And so he returned to her palace, that was still as impressive as he remembered it. Sally didn’t hesitate to put her arm around him, leading him to the living room, right through her lab, where she created all her wonderful candy.

„So, is there anything you want to forget or do you simply want to let your mind wander?“, she asked him while they strode through her house. Her tiny hand stroked his back, and she whispered right into his ear. 

„Uh..“, he laughed nervously. „It’s a bit of both…“

She let him to the big couch and made him sit down, pressing him right into the cushions with one hand on his chest. Then she knelt above him and took a glass vial from the table. Suddenly, Nick held out a hand. 

„Careful with this, I want to keep this moment in good memory.“ he said with decision.

Sally instead pursed her lips in an adorable way.

„You don’t want to try my special? Is this why you didn’t come back? Because you don’t like my candy anymore?“ She looked very sad and Nick could’ve slapped himself for ruining her mood.

„No, Sally luv, that’s ridiculous! I missed all your stuff. I…“, he stopped, searching for words to say. „Look, forget what I said, I’m very much of an idiot today, that’s why I need you.“

Sally’s face lightened up again.

„Don’t worry, special Sally is right here to save your day. Say aah…“

Nick obeyed and soon he felt a pleasant tickle on his tongue. He had actually wanted to be more careful with the drugs, but first, he never had any problems with Sally’s specials and second, he couldn’t say no to her anyway. He noticed, that the colors around him turned much brighter and the room was dominated by a giant…

„…rainbow“, he muttered.

Sally chuckled. „How did you know?“ Her voice sounded like it was fading into another dimension. He felt her hand on his cheek and he tried to lift his arm to pull her closer but he was too tired to move.

„You’ll have the most wonderful dreams…“, he heard Sally’s soft voice whisper, before he fell asleep.

Waking up, he was alone and still a bit foggy in his head. But the rainbow he had danced on in his dream was gone. He got up to look for Sally and left the room on wobbly legs. It was like he heard voices from afar. Could be illusions, or another customer. He leaned on the doorframe and peeked around the corner with curiosity to find out who was demanding Sally’s attention. At first he noticed that the customer was much taller than her, then he saw the proper suit, the dark curly hair, the familiar face, and then he only watched in bewilderment how she stretched her neck and placed a kiss on his lips, how they both remained like that for a long time until they finally parted and how Sally stroked his chest with one hand and whispered lovely words into his ear while he couldn’t turn his gaze from her, until he suddenly looked up and his and Nick’s eyes met. Sally turned around to see what was going on.

„Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt you…“, Nick stuttered and hastily made his way to the exit. „Thanks for the mind-blowing adventure Sally.“ When he passed by her he pulled her closer and kissed her too, drawing it out while Arthur stood right besides him. Then he let go of her and left the room without looking back.

Descending the stairs he wondered why he even made such a big fuss about it. It was completely normal for Sally to welcome everyone in her palace and sometimes offering more than just candy. But why should a downer come to her, if it wasn’t for personal reasons? Nick was able to put one and one together after all: First, Arthur ran away from his kiss and now he was here snogging with Sally and melting away in her hands. That looked like a clear situation to him. 

Standing outside, huffing and puffing, he said goodbye to his inspiration, if he wanted to create a happy song, that is. What was left for him to do?

He saw a second possibility, even though it was much more complicated. That made it more exciting though. In addition, he needed a distraction right now, or else he would have another breakdown right before Sally’s house.

So he made his way to Bates’ Music Shop, avoiding the front door and instead sneaking to the back of the shop and trying the door there. As expected, it was open. Good girl. Sneaking into the storage room, he soon found a woman with teased black hair searching for something in a box. When she heard his footsteps, she turned around and made a little jump.

„Helly, Kitty,“ Nick purred.

„Nick Nightbearer“, she shouted. „Uh..Barenighter!“

Nick chuckled. „You’re cute when you’re stuttering, baby.“ 

He stretched out an arm and leaned above her while she stared at him with wide eyes.

„How about closing the shop earlier today?“

„Uh…“, Kitty said and seemed to think hard. „…Relay? Yeah… we have some of those in the shop…“ She was about to run off into the shop, but Nick took her arm to stop her.

„No, no, I mean…we don’t we find a place for just the two of us?“

„Cymbals? Yes, we have those too…“ She wanted to go again but Nick still had her arm. 

„Kitty, do you have drum sticks in your ears today? I’m asking if you wanna sh…“

in this moment he heard footsteps and realized why Kitty had stared at him with a troubled expression the whole time. „…shoot.“

„Who are you talking to, Kitty?“ Bates’ voice sounded menacing.

„Quick, hide,“ she hissed and shoved him under a table that was covered by a blanked.

„It was just a customer, darling“, she then said to Bates who just came in.

„Really?“, he asked suspiciously. „And since when do they use the back door?“

„Some of them do…You know, they never read the „No Entrance“ signs, no matter how big I make them…“

While Kitty was keeping her husband busy, Nick set himself in motion and crouched along the table, until he cautiously came out behind Bates and sneaked into the shop.

„I thought I heard this voice before“, he heard Bates say before he quietly closed the door to the storage and turned around with a triumphant smile on his face.

The smile froze as he saw that the shop was filled with people who were dressed just like him, even the women. A banner decorated the ceiling, that said „Nick Lightbearer Convention“ and Nick suddenly had a bad feeling about this. They stared at him and he stared right back, fearing he would never make it to the exit in one piece. Then a woman started to yell, pointing a finger at him and a stampede broke loose. Nick yelled too and ran back to the storage room, but the door only opened for a short gap and behind that he saw the grinning face of Bates.

„I knew it! Nick Lightbearer himself, what an honor. I hope you have fun at your own convention!“

„Come on Bates, let me out! They’ll rip me apart!“, Nick begged, but the other man didn’t move.

„Darling, let him out, he didn’t do anything bad,“ he heard Kitty plead for him.

„Oh, he’s completely innocent, isn’t he? Funny though that the bloke who criticized his last record was found dead in the park last night!“

„What are you talking about?“, Nick shouted in desperation.

„It’s true, the man you pretend to be is the man you are inside. Lovely day for it!“

„You can’t be serious“, Nick shrieked as the door slammed shut and he heard the key turning around. Nick dashed against the door but it had no effect.

Meanwhile the mob of fans came closer. 

Nick pressed himself against the door, staring helplessly at the mass that came upon him, until his survival instinct took the lead and he started to run towards them, hoping in panic that he could make it through. Crashing against the mob it felt like an avalanche rolled over him, one that consisted entirely out of arms, with hands that grabbed him from everywhere. He kept tearing himself out of their grips, ignoring the sound of ripping cloth, flailing around and kicking and carving himself a way with his elbows. More than once he was about to drown in the masses and he could barely breathe anyway. When he finally made it out, he was completely exhausted, crawling out of the shop on all fours and not looking back. 

Crouching through the door he almost fell unconscious at the sight of an even bigger crowd of people that stood outside. Everyone who was still a fan of his must’ve been there, looking at him how he pulled himself up at the doorframe. Perhaps they would’ve taken him for another Lookalike, but he gave himself away when he lost his nerve and ran with the last bit of his strength. He was certain that the avalanche he had caused now was definitely fatal. No street was safe, so he hid in a trash bin and didn’t make any sound for a very long time, until it was so calm and quiet that he assumed that the mass had rolled by.

Crawling out of the bin he saw that his fancy rags were shredded and dirty, so he definitely needed new clothes. As fate willed, his other fancy rads were still in his hotel suite and on the way to the hotel he found the Convention right at the street he needed to follow. 

Surrendering to his fate, he slumped down on a bench, guessing he had to wait until the end of the Convention until he could go into a warm and comfy room again. Curling his fingers into his hair, he noticed that it was also completely destroyed. He couldn’t walk around like this! Looking around in desperation he saw another Wellie already approaching him, about to displease him for his inappropriate clothing. Nick looked at the other man’s clean suit and came to a conclusion. He let the Wellie come. 

„Sir, you shouldn’t be dressed like that.“

„Pardon?“ Nick acted deaf.

The other man stepped closer and seconds later he had a syringe in his stomach and collapsed.

„No worries,“ Nick assured the other citizens that strolled by. „Just a Joy overdose, I’ll bring him back home.“ No one questioned it, easy answers to problems always were the best.

Nick threw the man over his shoulder and carried him into a back alley where could switch clothes unseen. With the torn rags the Wellie only looked like a Convention guest who had overdone it. Nick eyed himself, content with his new outfit. Maybe a bit too tame, but therefore live-saving. Before he could go back to the hotel though he had to make another even harder step. His hair and his face, both could still give him away.  This day didn’t spare him anything, he thought to himself. Did he really have to do this? He didn’t even remove his wig to sleep, he wasn’t himself without it. But the longer he pondered over it the more it seemed that he had no chance. 

With a really unpleasant feeling in his stomach he removed the wig and placed it next to the Wellie. Then he took the mask. The cold air on his skin felt rather strange, taking him way back. He had already forgotten how it felt to have no mask on his face. He didn’t even know the time all of this started. Was it ten years ago? Nick wasn’t even popular yet when they became the law. And then Joy came. The person he had been before Joy was someone Nick didn’t know anymore. Even Arthur kept the mask. 

Arthur…better not think about Arthur, Nick told himself and swapped his mask with the one of the Wellie. Goodbye Lightbearer mustache. The urge to get into the hotel suite was much stronger now.

Funny how things go, Arthur thought, running down the stairs from Sally’s home. „You came back to her to apologize, because you’ve been a complete arse to her and she surprises you by being not mad at all. She’s saying all these wonderful things you had wished her to say when you meet her again, she’s lovely and sweet and even kisses you with passion - and then it all turns out to be another bloody lie, it turns out that you had all the right to be an arse, that there’s always someone better than you to kiss and to spice things up, this kind of people seems to be the only one you ever meet and they’re always going to be an utter disappointment. 

Arthur didn’t make a pause until he was back in his hideout. He ignored that his face was all wet.

Congratulations, Arthur! The only one who ever cared about you was the one you abandoned in Germany!

[singofsolace]

The Proposal, Chapter 19

Read it all here on Ao3, or check out this excerpt below!

The Kiss

“Pippa, you wicked witch, you!” said a familiar voice as someone knocked Pippa hard on the back, causing her to spill her champagne.

Dimity Drill was wearing the biggest smirk Pippa had ever seen, and stuck out like a sore thumb in the crowd of aristocrats.

“Dimity? What are you doing here?” said Pippa. It wasn’t that she wasn’t happy to see her—quite the opposite, in fact—but Caithness was a long journey to make on such short notice.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were engaged?” said Dimity, swinging her hands out in exasperation and nearly knocking over a whole tray of champagne glasses in the process.

“Hecate wanted to keep the circle small,” said Pippa, trying to locate her assistant in the crowd but failing.

“If it weren’t for Helli-boring stalking around the office all of yesterday like somebody had pissed in his morning coffee, I wouldn’t have even known to get on the next flight to Scotland!”

Pippa’s eyes went wide. “You took a non-magical plane to get here?”

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world!” said Dimity, hitting Pippa on the back again. At least this time, Pippa was ready for it. “I knew there was something going on between the two of you.”

Finally, Pippa spotted Hecate having a conversation with several members of the Witch’s Council. She whispered a spell to let Hecate know she should come find her. Hecate visibly jumped when the spell hit her, which shouldn’t have amused Pippa as much as it did. Her assistant immediately excused herself from the conversation and turned towards them. The look on her face was comical when she spotted Dimity, who was waving so enthusiastically, a number of the other guests had begun to stare.

“So, did I miss the story?” said Dimity, as Hecate walked towards them.

“The story?” asked Pippa, her confusion clear on her face. Hecate had come to stand beside her, and completely on a whim, Pippa reached out to slip her arm into the crook of Hecate’s elbow. This startled her, but Hecate relaxed into the touch almost immediately, as if remembering that this was all a part of the show.

“About the proposal?” said Dimity, winking at Hecate. “How a woman proposes says a lot about her character.”

Pippa looked to Hecate, uncertain. Hecate just stared back, completely out of her depth.

“We haven’t told the story. It’s…private,” said Hecate, hoping that would be sufficient to end this line of inquiry, but Dimity’s grin just got wider.

“Oh, come on,” Dimity’s voice was way too loud. More and more of the guests were pausing their conversations to stare at them. Even the Duchess and Miss Bat were making their way towards them, as if pulled by a string to the spectacle that was Dimity Drill. “Which one of you proposed? At least tell me that much?”

Pippa took a deep breath before saying, “I did.”

“And was it everything you ever wanted, Hecate?” said Dimity, her tone far too teasing to be considered entirely polite.

By then, the Duchess and Miss Bat had come close enough to be a part of the conversation.

“Yes, we’d love to hear the story as well,” said the Duchess, eyeing Hecate curiously.

“I—well—um,” Hecate floundered. “Pippa would love to tell the story, so I’ll let her…do that.”

Pippa wanted to elbow Hecate in the ribs for the way everyone was now staring at her expectantly, but she couldn’t very well do it without people seeing.

Dimity, to make matters worse, grabbed a glass of champagne and a spoon to hit it with, drawing the attention of everyone in the garden. “Speech! Speech!”

“No…there’s no speech,” said Pippa, but now that all eyes were on her, she realized that they ought to have thought this through a little better. She couldn’t very well tell the crowd that she had proposed to Hecate on a busy London street, after going to the Office of Magical Immigration and Relocation.

“Come on, Pentangle! I know you love a good story,” Dimity said, smirking. Pippa had to fight the urge to threaten to fire her if she kept this up.

Just then, Pippa noticed the Duke, who was standing off to the side of the crowd, looking absolutely murderous. Well, if there was one thing she wanted more than anything in the world, it was to “flaunt her lifestyle” just to spite him.

Pippa forced herself to chuckle, leaning in closer to Hecate with what she hoped to be an expression of pure adoration. Hecate’s eyes were wide, but there was a level of trust in her gaze that nearly robbed Pippa of all breath.

“Where to begin?” Well, we…um. We had just celebrated our first anniversary—”

“Bloody hell! You’ve been together a year?” interrupted Dimity Drill. “How did I never realize…?”

“That was my choice,” Hecate said, suddenly, which surprised Pippa. “I asked Pippa if we could keep the nature of our relationship…private.”

“Yes,” said Pippa, “and let me tell you, it was a hard secret to keep, especially when you love each other as much as we do.”

Hecate looked completely baffled by this, which prompted Pippa to squeeze her elbow just a bit. Hecate shouldn’t be surprised by any part of this story; it was important that she just stand there and smile, or at least not do anything that would make the tale suspicious.

Read more

[helish-archive]

A moment of peace. 

That’s what they were having, although everything is relative, you know. Just as the legions of undead creatures weren’t chasing after them at the very moment, they still were left with planning a way out of this situation, the possibility of being attacked -- high. It was nice and quiet, but probably too quiet for both of them not to be constantly alert and suspicious. Helena was clearly twitchy, even though she was hiding it very well for someone who’d just been bitten by one of those things not too long ago. She must’ve been in horrible pain, and she lost a lot of blood before she could use her telekinesis and squeeze the ends of her wound together--- ugh, how did she even do that, and the sound of it... unforgettable, nasty.

Yet there she was, leaning against the hood of the car, as if nothing had happened. She drank up a weird-looking potion and joked, once, twice. Claimed she’d be healing soon, but even so, naturally, left her partner in a state of utter worry due to nearly losing her back then. Did she even stop to consider the reaction that had caused? All the fear for her life in the air, the desire to protect her, the words that were said in an anxious frenzy... the ‘L’ word almost dropped, almost.

After giving it some thought, the idea settled: she was no fool, no matter how much she played out to be one. This woman actually noticed all, saw all. Clever as the devil and twice as pretty--- that was the real image behind her. Therefore she must’ve decided to ignore all possible opportunities to engage, and yet, she received the injury in an attempt to draw the attention of the creature towards herself.

If asked, reckon, she’d wave it off on the instinct or something. She needed a companion to survive this and recover the relic. Would never admit to caring, but then why did the melody of her laughter sound so different as of late, the tone of her voice softer, the usual ‘don’t die’ command so very firm with the shade of something... something non-negotiable, a certainty that wasn’t there before. The same certainty mirrored in her eyes. Whatever it was, she felt it. Was aware.

What a sad situation, since there were so many ways to thank her now. Wrap arms around her, maybe kiss the top of her head, then gently place a peck on her lips, and whisper words of gratitude, yet she’d have none of it and by the end of this whole ordeal, she’d let out her usual grin, and bow her good-byes. Again, as if nothing had happened. Always pretending. Always running.

Who knows when she comes around again, asking for help with one of her insane and intoxicating ventures, her jumpiness and mischievousness highly infectious, always appealing to something deeply primal inside. That desire to flush down all the rules and to risk it all and for what: some vague payment, for the challenge of it, character growth---- or for a chance to see her smile genuinely? For her company.

As if in a daze, in complete silence of her surroundings, Hel hears a click and she turns, surprise washing all over her before she sees that it’s a phone camera, and she grins so beautifully, with a training of someone who knows the trick -- got to look cheerful and calm, as if you’re up to something legal, if a shot is taken; anything in order not to draw suspicion. So she turns out so wondrously lovely, even though she’d just been running away from monsters, hurt, seeming serious but a second ago. There is an aura of magic about her, hair a gorgeous golden mess covering her shoulders and distracting from the dirt on her face, the torn clothes. For a brief moment in reality and frozen forever in time in the phone album, she sports the cutest smile and her eyes are shining with rare warmth, undoubtedly intended for the person who took the photo. Busted.

‘What--- What are you doing?’ she laughs out, causing goose bumps to appear.

‘Eh, nothing. Nothing. Just for memory’s sake.’ The nervousness behind the statement is unmistakable, and she obviously took note of it. Now she will pretend it never happened, surely. ‘Been wanting to do this for a while.’

Just so, she shakes her head, and the question she’d meant to ask dies behind her eyes. She almost wonders ‘why’ out loud, but knows too well what the answer’d be, were she to. The realisation comes on strongly. Coward. That’s what she is deep down, underneath all the layers. With all her love of fear and risks, when it comes to something like this, she is but a lowly coward. Ha. Whenever a step closer is taken, she moves twice as far away.

However there must be a way to catch her. The phone camera just did, after all. Maybe there’s hope. Especially after such a revelation, there might be a way to poke at this.

‘Yeah, we should go.’

‘As you say, Helly.’ There is a first time for everything, to call her so endearingly, for example. The grin comes out dangerous and over-the-top charming, with the feeling of having figured her out empowering, fueling it, and she pretends that doesn’t affect her, but her shoulders roll under the heavy gaze. She knows what this is about, all right, tries not to stare back.

Look at me, why won’t you. What are you so afraid to see in my eyes? That, what will reflect in yours?

For a while the silence is incredibly uncomfortable, and it’s not due to the evil lurking everywhere around, but because of the darkness she’d locked up in her heart and refuses to share, thinking it’d be too much for someone else to bear.