#and sorry tara

[stealthnoodle]

How to Scrape Your Way Through Honour Mode and Look Reasonably Good Doing It

I won't say I beat Honour Mode on my first try, because my Dishonour Mode playthrough served as a critically useful dry run, but I will say that the first character I made with the intention of completing Honour Mode properly did in fact complete Honour Mode.

Below are the 13 most important lessons I learned along the way that made this possible.

1) Do not be Mothman.

You really want to minimize fights and maximize available vendors. Ask yourself "What would Mothman do?" and then do not do that thing.

2) Do be a half-orc.

Fights can go real wrong real fast, and in the early game, you are perpetually one bad round of combat away from oblivion. In my case, the harpies critted Shadowheart to death, and then every chucklefuck in my party failed their wisdom save at the same time. The other two members ate more multiattacks than they could handle, and then so did Pizzazz, but she held on with one single precious hit point after the last blow. She dug herself out of the hole with heal potions and her fists of righteous anger.

Pizzazz being a half-orc saved the entire run here. Having Death Ward once a day comes in fucking clutch when you're below level 5, and tbh the hardest part of Honour Mode is getting to level 5.

The harpy fight was also when I realized the need for a critical strategy:

3) Make one party member your panic button.

I only really needed this trick in the early game (I cannot emphasize enough how most of my close calls were before level 5), but it saved my ass several times. Panic early, panic often.

Pick the party member who has the least to contribute to a fight and park them where they can't get drawn into initiative. You can leave them all the way back at camp, or if you're me, just put them far back in hiding so it's easy to pull them in to help with late-fight cleanup if things are going well (or to finish a fight in the goofiest way possible, see above). Either way, their job is to run crying to Withers if everyone else dies.

Speaking of which…

4) Exploit Bone Daddy's indifference to being pickpocketed.

You can get back whatever "the price of balance" is by yoinking it right out of Withers's pockets. If you fail the sleight of hand check, no worries; you get pulled out of hiding, but he doesn't react at all, and you can just squat back down and get right back in there.

5) Tell Jesse you need to cook.

Potions of Speed are the goddamn Philosopher's Stones of this game. So I made Gale a Transmutation Wizard, made him proficient in Medicine, and put him in charge of alchemy. Just clearing the gnoll zone got me pretty well set for the first two acts.

Getting double heal pots sure doesn't hurt, either.

6) Start a local chapter of the Warding Bond Cleric Club.

This is something I discovered was possible while I was fretting over prepping for the end of Act 2, because last time was such a clusterfuck. You can hire three hirelings, give them fun names like Ouchie Magnet, Sexy Pincushion, and Yoohoo Loviatar, get them to cast Warding Bond on the party members you actually intend to use, and enjoy the full benefits of it out in the world while your hirelings stand around bleeding at camp.

Any buff that lasts until the next long rest and doesn't require concentration works like this, fyi. Death Ward and Longstrider are also especially handy (and once you get to level 11, Heroes' Feast). Setting this up is tedious enough that I only did it a few times during the game, when I was going into situations I couldn't easily extricate myself from in case of emergency. (So the Mindflayer Colony, the Iron Throne, the Steel Watch Foundry, and one last time for the Temple of Baal.)

7) Break big battles up into bite-sized skirmishes.

Why would I fight all the cultists at Moonrise Tower in a grand climactic battle when I could sneak around before finishing the Gauntlet of Shar and pick off my future foes in packs? Since they're not hostile yet, it's pretty simple to wipe them out one room at a time, using Minor Illusion to lure guards away from their posts. Then I got the joy of showing up with Jaheira and all her Harpers to curbstomp the two (2) guys I missed.

Also good for removing all the intellect devourers before you pick a fight with Mindflayers in the Mindflayer Colony and for surviving gnoll swarms. Sometimes you even get lucky and a hyena falls into a hole, somehow.

8) Fill your camp with literal tons of explosives.

See a smokepowder barrel? Pick it up and send it to camp. Do this consistently and you will have deeply nervous party members every time you light a campfire, probably, but you'll also have a way to cheese boss fights that you're worried about. I chugged elixirs that raised strength before the end of Act 2 so that I could bring a dozen smokepowder barrels with me to the Myrkul fight and absolutely trivialized it.

9) Become a partial illithid.

Mourn your aesthetic and commune with that frosty little worm. (Take Volo's amateur eye surgery, too, btw. Just fuck yourself up.) The powers are worth it. A truly hardcore player would also get their companions to dip a toe into ceremorphosis, but I started by asking Astarion, who fucking loves regular tadpoles, to try it, and his response made me feel so bad that I abandoned the cause entirely.

10) Start your day with a delicious and nutritious Heroes' Feast.

So I never really read the description closely because sometimes I'm just like that, but thanks to the Warding Bond Cleric Club, I started paying closer attention to buffs and holy shit??? Thoroughly Stuffed is a baller condition, and it also makes food. I didn't have to go grocery shopping even once! Having three bonus clerics with spell slots to burn also meant the 6th-level cost wasn't coming out of Shadowheart.

11) Accept that late-game enemy saving throws will mercilessly fuck you.

It feels real bad when you cast a 6th-level spell that operates on saving throws and your target shrugs it off with 0 damage. Spells with attack rolls are usually better bets, and Artistry of War is a wizard's once-per-short-rest MVP. Open Hand Monk Pizzazz was consistently my best damage dealer, especially once I looted the Bonespike Gloves from Strangler Luke.

12) Skip the high-risk low-reward quests in Act 3.

Consider your party composition and tactics and whether any optional quest line is worth completing for its rewards. Cazador, the Sharrans, and Ansur are non-trivially difficult fights that I didn't need to subject myself to, so I didn't. But there's real good shit under Sorcerous Sundries, so of course I cleared out that vault.

Hell isn't actually that bad on Honour Mode (no, really! The restoration faucets have unlimited uses!), but it's not a sure thing and I could live without the rewards. Had a tense moment passing the DC 30 Persuasion check with Kith'rak Voss later, but he chilled out and even let me borrow his dragon's breath.

The only unnecessary hard fight I did was the Steel Watcher Titan, which was a bad call on my part; I kinda wanted the crossbow and I really wanted to keep the runepowder bomb in case I needed it, but Mothman didn't do this fight, so I was not prepared for the Hellfire Steel Watcher Titan's bullshit. I won, but it was a closer shave than it should have been.

Then I ended up not using the crossbow at all.

13) Thank Gale for his sacrifice.

The Netherbrain is fucking nasty on Honour Mode. Fuck Karsite Grip. Fuck Aegis of the Absolute. Does it feel bad to make Gale sacrifice himself? Yes. Would it feel worse to lose the run right before the finish line? Also yes.

I brought every explosive I had with me (which required two rounds of strength-boosting elixirs, because the game hits you with a long rest before the Astral Plane) just in case Gale got cold feet and I burned all my inspiration fucking up the persuasion roll, then went through the sewers to avoid the larger fight. Someone (Gale, so I couldn't be too mad) failed a stealth check and aggroed them all anyway, but Pizzazz covered the ground to the brainstem in like three rounds and everyone warped up after her for the cutscene, so no harm no foul.

Then Gale volunteered—nay, insisted on blowing himself up and I felt bad! Real bad! Not bad enough to change course, but Pizzazz's face was also my face during epilogue:

P.S. At least for me, the achievement procced after the epilogue, credits, and post-credits scene, and I was tense af the entire time. But not so tense I couldn't be sad about Gale (oh no he wrote me a letter) and Astarion (oh no he's still in hiding because of Cazador). Luckily my big hot wife was there to support me.

Anyway, let's load an old autosave on another campaign and check out those golden dice, shall we?

Ahhh, my horrible son

[corinthianrm0]

the cyberpunk Gale no one asked for (G4l3?)

BLAME MARU (lexindre on bsky)

[liorlen]

gale origin playthru from astarion’s pov or smth like that

[tubesock86]

the scoobies (plus faith and spike)

[galedekarios]

i think one of my favourite and most hilarious things about tara is something that becomes especially clear in the epilogue when you talk to her alone and away from gale:

she absolutely thinks that gale is the main character of bg3, the saviour of not only baldur's gate but the sword coast, while the protag is (at best) gale's occasionally useful sidekick.

Player: You must be Tara. It's a pleasure to meet you. Tara the Tressym: Yes, I'm certain it is. As for you, well, I've heard congratulations are in order. Tara the Tressym: You helped Mr Dekarios save Baldur's Gate from the Absolute, isn't that right?

nor does she particular care of the protag tries to correct her:

Player: Actually, Gale helped me. Tara the Tressym: That doesn't sound like him. But whichever way you want to remember it, well done, I suppose. Tara the Tressym: Ta-ta, darling.

🐈👑

[necromosss]

Just spent the better part of an hour scrolling your blog and have to say, I adore Mira.

If you're still doing Mira asks, how did gale react when Mira told him she was pregnant???

(If you've done this and I haven't seen it I apologise lol)

I actually had gotten about three asks about this but i didn't have a good enough idea on how to write/draw it until now... here you go :3 (sorry for the long post!)

Bonus:

[theunholyvirginemilyprentiss]

You hear that? That’s the sound of my FBI agent sighing as I open my laptop to start rewatching Criminal Minds for approximately the 2000th time just so I can cry about and/ or crush on all the characters. He hates his job. He hates me. But I will not stop.

[wistfulwatcher]

in a n o t h e r life

[almightyramtha]

Hanging out with your books when you could be booking up with your wife, Mr. Dekarios??? Shame.

[eruptedinlight]

STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | The Wedding <3

[slumpsnail]

I'm sorry but I had to get this out of my head

[squashberri-art]

Tara doodle

[cowboygenes]

Could you do some Halsin taking care of Gale lovingly?

He is indeed sick

[jareauwalker]

would you fuck, marry, or kill the criminal minds character you get?

[ikyoudreamofme]

Please…-Fratboy!Chris x Mentallyill!Reader

Summary: Reader is in a bad place but no-one notices until Chris sees her at one of his friends parties blackout drunk, messy hair, worn out makeup and darks under-eyes he notices something is wrong with his girl.

T/W:SH, bad mental health, mentally drained reader, consumption of alcohol,drug abuse, suicide attempt.

A/N: If you are in a bad place please speak to someone it will get so much better I promise. If anyone needs someone to talk to my messages are open. Also love writing sad fics, love you all and thank you for reading. xoxo

PART 2 IS OUT

--------------------------------------------------

You lay hooked up to machines asleep, Chris sat beside the bed his head on the side of it holding your hand waiting so painfully for you to wake up.

2 hours before

You stumble into the party that Chris’ friend had thrown. You hadn’t spoken to Chris for a few days, leaving your phone at home dead. Your head is heavy as you push through the crowd of sweaty bodies, a bottle of Vodka in your hand that you had brought. Your hair is a mess, eyeliner and mascara smudged around your eyes enhancing the eye bags from the lack of sleep. You trip walking into someone. He holds your shoulders looking down at you. “sorry” you slur going to turn around but he stops you. “it’s okay. I’m Ryan I’ve not seen you before?” He looks down at you his hands moving from your shoulders to your waist, looking up at him through your lashes your, tired eyes saying many words, you shrug pushing his hands off you, stumbling deeper into the crowd of people.

You toss the empty bottle to the side pointing yourself another drink. Someone walks up beside you pouring themselves a drink. “what are you doing?” They whisper stepping closer to you. You turn around looking up at the boy. Chris. “getting a drink?” You reply taking a sip balancing yourself on the table. He shakes his head “you’re already wasted and you’re coming to a party you knew I’d be at but you’re ignoring my messages.”

“Chris it doesn’t matter.” You groan not in the right headspace for a conversation with Chris or anyone. Chris tilts his head a concerned look washing over him. “You’re never like this. What’s going on?” You sigh looking up at him through dead eyes. You stay quiet mumble something incoherent before walking back into the crowd. You fight tears blinking rapidly hearing your name being called out from behind you, you don’t dare to look back afraid of breaking down in front of Chris.

You make your way to the dealer that always shows up to frat parties. “I need something strong.” You tell him gulping your drink. “don’t sell to drunk people.” Is all he says. You roll your eyes pulling a hundred out your bra waving it in front of him like it’s nothing. He gives in handing you the pills before snatching the money out your hand. Walking into the bathroom you place the little baggy of pills on the counter. You place them in your mouth downing it with the left overs of your drink.

Footsteps get louder and closer to the door as your vision and hearing fade out. “Y/n! Open the door please! There’s something wrong and I need to know you’re okay! Please y/n” Chris shouts banging on the door, you reach out to open it before your vision goes dark and everything stops.

[tyummy-rp]

Missed Connections || Tara & Ted

It seemed the universe was taunting her, or maybe she was just hallucinating. Either way she had been seeing the same guy everywhere she went for the last week. And everytime she tried to say anything, it was as if it just wasn’t meant to be. Or, again, maybe it was a hallucination.

The first instance, Tara had been showing Tana around the campus when she spotted him. Tall, cute and in a milk man’s outfit? “Ew, bitch don’t even think about it.” Tara frowned as Tana seemed to already be reading her mind. “But-“ “YOU’RE VEGAN.” well. She had a point there. And at any rate Tana was already dragging her away, so she couldn’t exactly make a scene. Still, she did try to catch his eyesight, she was never quite sure if she did.

The next time, Tara was sneaking into Theta to steal Bailey away for a hangout. She was waiting for her to come out when she caught sight of him for only a moment, he was tall enough that he was hard to miss. After this, she affectionately started referring to him as the milkman since she still didn’t know his name. She saw him one other time in passing on her way to therapy.

Starting to feel a little bit like a stalker, Tara had all but given up on finding this mystery man- which felt kinda ironic given her recent birthday theme. Whoever he was, he wasn’t meant for her to find, so she’d get him out of her head some other way. Sitting under one of the larger trees in the quad, she sketched a comic style version of him from that first day she saw him. Maybe getting him on paper would make her drop the whole thing.

@teddy-visi0n