#and shes like. noticeably buff here which i am a fan of

[wosowrites]

Against All Odds (Jessie Fleming x Reader)

warnings: none

prompt: in which reader is a super buff boxer but gets all soft around Jessie, making Jessie’s teammates tease her.

a/n: for @woso-scotland

Growing up with 5 older brothers meant one thing. Chaos. The only time you all got along was when you were watching boxing on the TV. However, when you were 11, the middle child, Jacob, died. You had never heard the house so quiet, it haunted you to this day. He had only been 15.

But, 11 year old you wanted to make your family feel better, she wanted to give her family back the five boxers for children they had before the accident.

That’s why when you told your father you wanted to take up boxing, he didn’t say no. Your dad was your biggest fan. He came to every game, gave you tips until you were too good for them, and supported you through everything including your coming out. You were the only person in the family that had continued boxing, your brothers turning into architects, police officers and family men while you stayed nose deep in the world of boxing.

By the time you were 20, you were incredibly well known in the boxing world, and at the same time, a certain 20 year old was growing a name for herself too. Only in the football industry. However you would only meet Jessie Fleming years later at a gym…

You were ripped, to say the least. But not the kind of ripped that would go noticed to everyone. You wore hoodies and sweatpants and it made your build discreet, but the second you were in a sports bra and shorts it was undeniable you could take anybody in a fight.

Jessie met you at the supermarket in London. It was the middle of COVID and your boxing season has been cut short. You were wearing light blue Columbia sweatpants and a matching crewneck with a black mask. Your sneakers were white, but just barely as you only left your house for essentials.

You had always lived in LA which made the sudden move to London, England shocked to your family. But you knew you needed to get away from the world during this virus thing.

You turned the corner, holding a basket in your hand which was filled with vegetables, milk, fruit and some protein bars. As you did, you felt a cart come crashing into your legs and sending you flying backwards, landing on the ground.

"Oh my god! I’m so sorry," the young woman squealed, quickly leaving her spot behind the cart and rushing to your side. "It’s okay, i’m fine," you laughed, rubbing you knees and standing up. "I’m- Im so sorry I was just lost in my own mind and I didn’t see you," she apologized again. "What are you, Canadian? Enough apologies. I’m okay," you teased. "How did you know?" she asked, helping you place your own groceries back into your basket. "Know what?" you questioned, only realizing now how beautiful the girl in front of you was, or at least what you could see of her was. "That i’m canadian?" she said.

"Oh. I didnt. I was just kidding, but that makes sense now, and the accent," you laughed. "Okay American," she clapped back, rolling her eyes teasingly. "I feel like i’ve seen you somewhere," you said to her, narrowing your eyes. "Uh- no. Probably not. I’m your average girl," she said.

"So am I," you said.

The next week, you saw her again. This time, you had just come from the gym so you had on shorts and a tank top, showing off your features. Jessie was there too. "Hey!" she said to you as you met her in. the dairy alley. "Hi. How are you?" you asked her. "I’m good. And you’re jacked," she said, not so discreetly passing her eyes over your body. Usually, someone staring at you like that would make you self conscious, but the way Jessie did it made you feel good.

"Uh, yeah," you laughed. "Oh my god. When I left here last week I thought i recognized you too. That’s because you… box, right? On TV! A few of my teammates have a crush on you. They hate boxing but they love watching you," she laughed. "Oh really now? Well I don’t really care what they think but I care what you do. Because I recognize you too. Jessie Fleming, olympic athlete, two times world cup attender, and Chelsea player," you said, listing her honours.

"Stalker," she accused. "Yeah," you smiled. "Okay well how about I get to know you through another mechanism than google," you suggested. "You mean a date?" she asked, clearly blushing. "I do,"

But then the whole world went into lockdown again and your dates were more like king calls till midnight and face time dates.

Everything worked out though, because on this day of April 14th 2023, you were dating and more in love than ever.

Jessie’s Canadian teammates found out first. You had travelled to Ottawa with her for the celebration tour of winning the Olympics. Jessie had a video of you screaming your guts out by yourself in your apparement when they won the games. You were yelling, crying, and got a noise complaint the next day. But you didn’t care. All you wanted to do with your life was support your girlfriend, and that’s all she wanted to do with hers.

So, that’s how you found yourself front row in tiny little place TD stadium, sitting on a chair that was a little tight on your quads. Jessie scored a penalty, mimicking the one she did at the Olympics and you yelled for that too. You were probably the only American that loved the Canadian team more than anything.

After the game, the team walked around clapping to the fans and when Jessie got to you she stopped and hugged you over the barrier. "Come down, the security here is light," she said to you. So you climbed over the railing and hopped onto the turf. "Janine!" Jessie called, ushering over a blonde who had been talking to a man who looked like her brother. Janine jogged over and looked at you with wide eyes. You were pretty menacing to people who didn’t know you. "This is… y/n, my girlfriend," Jessie said. "You’re- your what?!! How long have you been together?" Janine asked. "Um, well we’ve been taking it slow a year but we made it official like six months ago," Jessie said. "Six. Months?!" Janine whisper yelled. "Hi, I’m y/n," you said, sticking your hand out.

Janine had clearly forgotten you were there as her her snapped towards you in confusion. "Oh, sorry. Hi, I’m Janine Beckie," she said. "Y/n Y/l/n," you smiled, shaking it. "Like the boxer?" she asked. "Uh, yeah," you laughed.

The introductions were then made in the Canada locker room which was even scarier as what felt like hundreds of pairs of eyes were on you.

"Okay. So I don’t do this… it’s not my thing but I thought after keeping our… relationship… secret for months you guys deserved to know. This is my girlfriend, y/n. And yeah she’s the boxer," Jessie said.

You blushed furiously and smiled at the girls who started asking questions all at once. "How did you meet?"

"She hit me." you said. "Okay woah! You need to add context there," Jessie laughed. "She hit me with her shopping cart," you added.

"Okay and what are your intentions. Because this is Baby Canada right here and she can’t play with a broke heart," Chappy said, summoning her motherly side. "My intentions are to never let her go a day without feeling loved and supported. My intentions are to… watch her play with a smile on my face and make sure she knows that she is the most wonderful person I have ever met. My intentions are to go broke because I buy all of her jerseys," you said, ranting a little bit.

"Okay softie," Stephanie said, winking over at Jessie and giving her a thumbs up. "Sorry to do this y/n but the post game talk is just for players. Gotta kick you out," Bev said, heading towards the door. "Oh right. Okay well it was nice meeting you all," you said. You turned to Jessie and gave her a quick kiss on the lips which she responded by placing her hand against your abs and kissing back before you left the room.

The second you closed the door chatter erupted in the room. "Okay Fleming I see your type now," Vanessa teased.

Teasing and more teasing echoed in the room, Even Bev chipped in.

But eventually calm settled over TD place and Bev started the post game talk.

The Chelsea girls found out about Jessie’s relationship at the start of the season… by accident.

You had called her after practice to let her know that your car had broken down on the side of this little street in the middle of suburb London and you were lost. She answered your call in the changing room.

"Hey Jess, can you come get me? My car broke down and the car repair people came and got it but they couldn’t give me a ride. I’m literally standing in this random street that looks like it’s in the middle of a forest," you groaned down the phone. "What? Are you okay?" she asked. "Yeah. Im fine, just… it’s gonna rain soon Jess. I was coming home from visiting a friend and-"

"Babe, I’ll be there as soon as possible. Send me your location," Jessie said and then hung up.

"Babe?" Magda asked, the whole room silent. "Yeah. I have a girlfriend by the way and her car broke down so I gotta go get her," Jessie said, quickly putting on a matching adidas hoodie and shorts and stuffing her belongings into her gym bag. "Jessie! You’re giving four people a ride home. It’s your carpool day. Which means…" Niahm started saying.

"You are not coming with me." Jessie said sternly.

"Road trip!" Niahm, Lauren, Sam, Zecira and Emily said at once. "Wait. We want to come too, meet the girl," Pernille said, pointing between her and Magda.

"Please no," Jessie groaned. "Wait, who doesn’t want to come," she asked.

No one raised their hand.

"Everyone get in a car and follow mine," the Canadian exhaled.

Turns out you were thirty full minutes away, but that didn’t discourage anyone within the four cars trailing behind Jessie’s honda.

There was music blasting in every vehicle and when rain started pouring, Jessie knew you would be in a bad mood.

"Someone grab my phone and text y/n telling her i’m almost there," Jessie said, fumbling with her device and tossing it to Emily in the backseat.

Jessie saw you the second she turned the curve in the road. You had your hood up, your arms crossed and you looked ready to kill. She knew that you were just pissed off and would never hurt a soul, but to the other girls, you seemed positively menacing.

Jessie jumped out of her car and ran towards you, hugging you tightly. "I’m so sorry, everyone wanted to come and-"

That’s when you saw the four other cars behind your girlfriends, but you didn’t care, you just kept hugging her and let the tears of frustration mix with the raindrops on your face. "It’s okay baby, they were bound to meet me one day," you said, brushing her now wet curls out of her face.

You had excepted everyone to stay in their cars due to the insane amount of rain, but before you knew it, the entire Chelsea Women’s roster was in front of you in the street. Magda and Pernille hugged you gently, giving each other a wide eyed look as they both felt your muscle mass. "Holy shit. You’re the boxer. I watch you on TV like all the time," Guro said, eyes wide.

"Well so do I- I watch you, I mean. Not myself. I watch all of you guys," you laughed.

"Your Guro’s celebrity crush is what she’s saying," Jessie teased. "Well not anymore!" The Norwegian laughed.

You spent dozens of minute talking in the rain, the cold downpour not seeming so bad when you had Jessie’s hand in yours.

Eventually, you got into the front seat and banished Sam to Magda and Pernilles car to make room for you.

You talked to the girls in the car and answered questions that the Canadian team had already asked. But you didn’t mind because those questions just meant you were lucky enough to have Jessie Fleming sitting beside you.

"She gets super focused when she drives," Emily said. "I know, I think it’s because she’s a bad driver," you teased. "I’m not! It’s just the whole reverse thing is confusing. The cars go the opposite way then they do in Canada," she said, keeping her eyes fixed on the road.

You kept on looking at her, your eyes full of love. Jessie knew you were staring, but she just let the blush creep onto her cheeks and gave you a quick smile, returning the lovey dovey eyes.

Zecira snapped a picture from the backseat. The forest was clear through the windshield, and so were the droplets of rain. You could see Jessie’s blushing grin but not who it was directed too. She posted it to her story and closed her phone, enjoying the sound of the rain… and the one of Emily and Niahms arguing.

[revserrayyu]

2.5 trailer thoughts

I usually keep all my thoughts together for the story events, but I'm far too excited thanks to a certain character to contain all my excitement, so.. allow me to fangirl about the new trailer from today's livestream a little bit.

(there's really no spoilers but i'll kindly put everything below since it'll be a lot of chatter anyways)

Starting off with how bestest boy Luka is here! Not exactly sure how he hopped planets.. but I'll speculate about his arrival later. I do remember reading some people bring up a npc in the Shackling Prison who mentioned seeing a dude with a metal arm, but I never imagined it to be our boy and that he would actually physically be here!

I'm still a tiny bit bitter he never showed up during any main story mission, though it makes sense since he was released after the events of Belobog happened, so any time he's mentioned or we catch a glimpse of him makes me happy. Letting him get his own side event during this 2.5 patch too will be nice for him too!

I'm so fond of him and I'm always surprised how many people just don't care for the guy. I can understand how he could be a bit forgettable or not an impressive unit though, since I don't even have him built up either despite all the instances I told myself I would.

I know some people aren't fans of his design either, but c'mon, he's cute! Look at this buff, cheerful man with those pretty blue eyes, piercings and little ponytail! Aahhh.. he's precious to me.

Time to add Luka to the 'beat up Yanqing' squad alongside Blade, Jingliu, Dan Heng, Yunli and whomever else I'm forgetting. I hope our favorite boxer knocks his lights out.

Now for the spectators! I didn't notice her while first watching the livesteam, but Topaz is here! With Numby on her lap too, of course. And I was gonna assume that perhaps that's how Luka managed to arrive on the Xianzhou, courtesy of the IPC and their many connections, but then I remembered Topaz was just in Penacony.. so unless she went back and forth between planets then who knows how our boy ended up here. We can always guess the Express picked him up too. I dunno.

We even got Hook cheering on her fellow Moles member! Hard to miss Svarog there too though I wonder if Clara is with him and perhaps we just don't see her in this shot? I wanna say he trusts her enough to be on her own but then that brings up why would he even leave her side in the first place and not keep watch of the Underground, unless Svarog decided to join just to support Luka. That would be a nice little form of respect carried over from our boxer's mission. And Lynx which naturally leads me to question where Serval and Geppie could be right now. I can't imagine Gepard would be fine with having Lynx travel all the way to a new planet when the guy gets stressed out about her simply venturing into the snow plains during her job. Serval on the other hand.. yeah, she's totally let Lynx travel. But I'd still much rather see all the siblings around more! I miss them terribly! I'd love it if there were more Belobogians in the crowd that we just didn't get to see yet but I'm thankful we even get a few and learn that they're finally able to venture away from their cold, icy planet and experience new places like this.

And lastly we have the most handsome man in all of space and Qingque who is undoubtedly avoiding work. The two of them did actually meet previously during that silly hotel checkout event in Penacony so it's fun to seem them be friendly still.

Yeah, okay, so here's where I start to go crazy over our Lacking General more. What a surprise, right? I mean, how could I not after seeing her storm into battle whilst riding a ship like this??

At first, I also didn't notice it was Yukong who said the "Feixiao, the ports of Starskiff Haven are crawling with wolf-like creatures. They're moving fast," lines. My excitement for Feixiao clearly took priority. (I am curious why she bothered to say wolf-like instead of Borisin though? If Yanqing knows about them then surely Yukong knows what they are, right?)

Even if it's just a quick cutscene, I'm so thrilled for us to finally see Yukong fight! We've heard enough of her pilot days so something as simple as this is great, though I'd love to see her fly again too.

Feixiao coming in hot to aide her war buddy, still looking badass as ever, let's gooo!

Ma'am do you know how amazing you are??

She told Yukong to "Hold them back, I will be there immediately" and she definitely kept her word! Even using her follow up attack, or something visually similar to it.

That grin… oh god. I would willingly stand on the other end of her gunblade in order to see that prideful smirk of hers. (also never realized that pattern on the inside of her jacket before. that's pretty neat.)

*Mandatory screenshot for me to giggle and kick my feet to while I obsess over how beautiful her design is* tee-hee~

Okay so for this bow and arrow shot, there could always be the chance that this style of bow is standard and that all military personal use them, but since we don't see that many archers, I'm gonna blissfully assume she's borrowing Yukong's bow here. I was kinda amazed to see Feixiao capable of wielding a bow and arrow too, considering she's already mastered her gunblades and battleaxe, but hey, it just adds to her talent. It makes more sense after seeing that teaser of her upcoming myriad video though.

Ohhh buddy.. I know our lady experiences Moon Rage but I wasn't expecting her to go off quite like this!

Not only is she strong as fuck already but she's gonna end up as a boss fight too? Brooo.. that's insane. I love it. I pray she gets an awesome battle theme.

Now while her condition is certainly a big problem, I don't think she just decided "hey let me go insane at this very moment" and gave into it willingly. I'm sure she's gained a certain amount of control over it throughout the years, so my assumption coupled with her statement of her "lacking in worries" leads me to believe that something or someone (aka Hoolay) forced her into this state..

.. because hot damn, she looks positively possessed. It's such a simple detail but the red ring around her eyes is so effectively chilling, like you know you're in danger when you see her like this. I love this shot of her, honestly. I'm not gonna straight up say that Hoolay is controlling her somehow either, but more like Feixiao lost control of herself. What would get her to snap? I dunno, perhaps any bad news surrounding Jiaoqiu. You know, her right hand man who's supposed to keep her in good health. He wasn't spotted anywhere in the trailer, so who knows what happened to our master chef.

Huaiyan can be heard saying "Merlin's Claw, you have betrayed the alliance," but with how deep Feixiao's hatred is for Hoolay and the Borisin, I have my doubts about that. Of course, we could've all been played for fools and the two could actually be acquaintances of some sort, but it still wouldn't make sense to me. The only similarity these two could possibly bond over is Hoolay's line of them both being "monsters that were born for war and die for war."

I'm not saying I wouldn't love an evil Feixiao, since I do have my fair share of villains, but yeah. Anyways, obligatory screenshot to make me swoon even more.

Also I haven't a clue about what this light is or who or what it's coming from either but I for sure thought it was gonna wipe out our General the first time I watched the trailer..

only for her to just.. ignore it completely. Or re-direct it ever so slightly away from her. Either way, I'm impressed.

Naturally the trailers go by real quickly and are never in story sequence order so I could be totally wrong about this, but I wanna assume Feixiao regains control over herself during the fight to take down Hoolay? If her normal eyes and confident grin are anything to go by anyways.

After hearing bits and pieces about how Jingliu was the one who originally defeated Hoolay, the master of ice does indeed show up again for the upcoming patch! Oohhh I'm so excited. I wonder if Jing Yuan had anything to do with her sudden appearance considering she was locked up on another ship. Imagine if we get to see her and Feixiao team up in order to take down the beast? Oh my god, I think I'd pass out if we get such a scene!

It may just be this one screenshot, but her expression doesn't really seem like she's accepting an alliance with Hoolay. Still feels like there's some anger there to me. Maybe distrust. But nothing close to joy or calm. Or this scene could just be an illusion. Who knows.

Wouldn't it be grand though, if all of this was sorta planned? To get this close to Hoolay but instead of siding with him (because why on earth would Feixiao do such a thing) but to figure out if the war head is truly capable of providing a cure for her condition like Jiaoqiu hoped? Or perhaps she's just getting close to him to get her revenge in a sort of 'keep your friends close but your enemies closer' sort of way, yeah?

Many ideas and many days left until we get our answers. One thing is certain though: we need Jiaoqiu back at her side please, like now! Sir, please come back and calm down your General!

[stelladess]

Spoiler ahead for the CN livestream, so chapter 14 stuff and brief IS5 mention (also anime season 3 confirmed now). Do not keep reading to avoid spoilers. Just some of my early thoughts. Stream of conciousness, not having thought things through much kind of thing. Kind of just rambling. But tl;dr is that I am excited and it looks good to me.

So, they keep using Civilight Etherna to describe "Theresa" and even outright ask "is she really Theresa?" in the live stream, so no its not a full on resurrection... so from a certain point of view, I was right. Her kit seems super good, she a bard also the freebie operator. Since I do not have Skalter this is good news for me. Big buffs, can do true damage... is neat. Logos is... outright busted. His S1 is insanely good AFK skill which can just auto kill weaker enemies who enters his range, not even an attack and his S2 seems fine, his S3 is also insane. Depending on the numbers he might outperform Eyja but we´ll see, that is always the test is it not? Amiya gets to be an incantation medic, with an outright busted talent (passive health regen on skill, off and on skill gives max HP boosts, this applies to all operators for both it seems?) and a pretty good looking S1 (attacks two enemies, bonus damage) and an amazing S2 with a big burst of damage at first, then slow and true damage with targeting two enemies and.... once per mission... again. Its... fine, I´m not salty.... Anyway, the big star, is limited (I had hoped she would be freebie since her original was limited but oh well) Walter.... or, W has now picked a name for herself, we will have to learn the context in chapter 14, Wis´adel (she has a different S but my keyboard lacks it, it is pronouched as a "sh" sound though). Wis´adel is a flinger sniper who makes all other flingers irelevant and is absolutely busted. Because I am a big W fan (depending on the day it is either her or Kal´tsit who is my second favorite operator) and flingers were in a really bad spot I am kind of ok with this but I still prefer they do not just blatantly directly power creep operators or go too far on insane damage numbers. Her damage seems... a bit too high in my opinion, but because I love her as a character and am excited for her story going forward and her kit seems fun, just really overtuned, I will be pulling. And I guess Degenbrecher and Mlynar already brought us up to this insane damage level so I should not be surprised. Power creep is something I have kept up in many many games I play and there are times where a later power crept state was my favorite period of the game so I will not go and get too hung up on the power creep. Also, I was right to take notice of the floating black crown parts I think cause it is even more prominent now. Bunch of story related stuff here but I wanna wait with talking about that until I have sorted my thoughts and maybe even read chapter 14. On that note, story for chapter 14 has me INCREDIBLY hyped. 13 was my favorite chapter, dethroning chapter 8. And I really wanna know what they are cooking next! Also IS5 has a Kal´tsit boss... she wields a sword!!!! (There are some interesting stuff about Kal and weapons that comes up occasionally, this is in the past it seems so maybe we find out what the deal is?)

I do think its a kind of bad decision to make IS5 sarkaz themed though, I like the sarkaz stuff but I feel IS is best used for parts of the world not explored in as much depth elsewhere. (I think it works with IS3 doing something explored a lot elsewhere but I kinda do not want them to keep doing that). But back to positive stuff the character designs are great. Wis´adel design has really grown on me, I think its a huge downgrade from what she wore before but it feels like it fits her so I am fine with that. Amiya has improved her fashion sense, at first I was sad at no more big coat/cape but that turned out to just be cause the blurry art... she went for a long coat instead of big coat that was actually a normal coat but just too big for her. So it still is something actually made to fit her but still retains the big coat look to some extent. Civilight Etherna boobs seem bigger then Theresa´s(?) Is it to contain the myriad souls? Deep lore implications about this at least! Logos uniform is good but like, so are all Rhodes uniforms. I do not feel it is exceptionally good for a Rhodes uniform but it suits him. Oh and also we see Wis´adel studying in one of the PVs, Hoederer must be so proud she is finally taking her education seriously~! Lastly on addressing the name situation... I will keep using W until chapter 14 is out on global to avoid spoiling people, after that I will probably switch to using her new name. Names are a very important thing especially when you pick them yourself.

[jamverse]

still not entirely sure if and how submissions work so hopefully this works?

ok this could be wildly ooc but I couldnt stop thinking about it and also I drew the first panel like a week after I finished the others so sorry if theres any inconsistencies 

your characters are just fun to draw my dude

OK SO I SAW THIS LIKE RIGHT BEFORE I HAD TO LEAVE FOR WORK THIS MORNING AND IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT ALL FUCKING DAY. HOLY SHIT.

“aircraft warning light looking-ass”… GET him amaranth. god. thank u for reminding me im really gonna have to learn to drag my characters if im gonna be writing someone like amaranth.  anyway im losing my mind i love this thank you 

[chaos-burst]

questions and answers

He had meant to be rude. And it had not worked even a little bit. Eodwulf is sure that anyone else would have been offended. Hell, he’s even sure that the other members of this weird group were absolutely offended on behalf of their friend. But Eodwulf can’t say he has ever met a person like this.

There was no malice, no ill intent, no anger.

When you work with Trent you have to be aware of every little shift in the mood. The slightest twitch of an eyebrow can mean the weather is about to turn foul. Eodwulf knows what to look out for. It had been his intent to rev this weirdo up and it had backfired spectacularly.

Damn.

No meat. No booze. And balls of steel, apparently. Eodwulf had never seen anyone talk to Trent like that. And while Bren‘s—Caleb‘s—words of wanting to kill Trent outright had been more than Eodwulf would ever admit to his mentor, it somehow felt less crazily reckless than to call Trent Ikithon, Archmage of Civil Influence for the Cerberus Assembly and one of the most powerful mages in the Empire, a fucking fool.

To his face. With a smile. In a complete sincere manner.

Eodwulf doesn’t want to replay the words in his head over and over again but his dumb brain has latched onto them and he can’t stop. Only this time it’s not one of Trent’s lessons that forces him to obsessively repeat something until you have internalized it to the point where you can cite it in your sleep.

No.

“Pain doesn’t make people. It’s love that makes people.“

Eodwulf has it on repeat in his head the whole way back to the tower and it is still going when he lies down hours later to sleep.

“What are you“ had not been meant as a serious question when Eodwulf had asked it. But by the time he finally falls asleep he feels like it has become a very vital question indeed, because who or what would dare to speak to Master Trent Ikithon in a way like this with an honest smile on their face.

*

Because for some reason his thoughts have decided to betray him, Eodwulf’s brain makes his tongue and lips form the words again when they see the Mighty Nein the next time. This time, Astrid and Eodwulf have been invited to dinner—Trent has very specifically not been invited, you could say he was uninvited with quite a few flowery words in a strange accent.

And as soon as Eodwulf sees Caduceus he remembers the weirdly polite scratching of a chair, the wide smile that indicates that this is a person Eodwulf possibly can not force to lose their composure through careful placed rudeness. And his mouth betrays him.

“So. What are you, really?“

Caduceus blinks mildly surprised before his unfamiliar features shift into a warm smile that has Eodwulf feel quite a lot of inappropriate things he didn’t expect to find in a place like this.

“Gardener. Maker of fine tea. A decent cook. Keeper of graves“, Caduceus lists of and he uses his long fingers to count the things that are important to him about himself.

“Very powerful cleric“, Jester chimes in from the right. She has Astrid next to her in a chair and Eodwulf is pretty sure that Jester has started to put flowers in Astrid’s hair. But surely he must be mistaken. Who in the Nine Hells are these crazy people?

“Oh, yeah. Well, that too, I suppose“, Caduceus says, his smile still warm like honeyed wine.

“Huh“, Eodwulf says because he can’t for the life of him think of something else to say. But Caduceus is yet again pulling out a chair for him so Eodwulf straightens his shoulders and sits down next to Caduceus. Across the table from him the angry one throws herself into a chair and stares at him.

There’s no fear there either, but she can be easily angered, something Eodwulf is good at. He gives her a canine smile and she holds up her middle finger.

This group is full of people with an enormous lack of self preservation.

And they are so loud.

Eodwulf almost doesn’t hear it when Caduceus turns to him to ask him a question.

“Huh?“, he says again, like a fool.

“And what are you, was what I wanted to know“, Caduceus says, his lazy grin open and honest. There is no malice in his words. He actually wants to know.

Eodwulf thinks “Murderer, wizard, protégé, spy“ but he doesn’t say any of these things. “Maker of graves“ comes to mind, but it seems like too dark of a joke to make.

“Enthusiastic about both meat and booze“, he says in the end and Caduceus laughs.

“Yeah, as are most of my friends.“

The implication these words bring is probably only in Eodwulf’s mind but it makes him swallow and look away to find Astrid’s eyes. But Astrid now has pink flowers in her hair and a look of absolute confusion on her face as Jester rattles of compliment after compliment about various of Astrid’s features.

Eodwulf can’t help but look at Bre—Caleb. And he sees that there is a soft, barely noticeable smile on his old friend’s face as he watches the scene unfold.

What am I, indeed, he thinks.

*

Trent’s orders have been clear. Get close to the group called the Mighty Nein to find out what they are working on with Lady Vess DeRogna.

Eodwulf allows himself to think that Caduceus might have been right. Maybe Master Ikithon is indeed a fool.

Because being in the presence of these people is like nothing Eodwulf has ever experienced and it makes him think, wonder, question—

“Here we are again“, Caduceus says after, yet again, Astrid and Eodwulf have been invited for dinner. Eodwulf wonders if this group just wants to make it very easy to spy on them, or if they have an agenda of their own—but it’s hard to believe that there might be any coherent agenda behind anything these people do.

He has watched the buff one called Yasha try and play what looked like a harp made of bone and when the angry one, Beau, told her that she looked hot playing the harp Yasha had torn two of the strings which had led to a whole scene of apologies and various tries to fix the harp.

Jester has drawn dicks on pretty much every surface this magical mansion has and she delights in the fact that Caleb brings the dicks to life in various colors. At some point he made glowing sparkles shoot out of one of the dicks Jester had drawn and Jester had laughed as if this was the best joke she had ever witnessed.

Eodwulf notices Astrid’s eyes on Jester.

Eodwulf also notices that while there seems to be no agenda or efficiency behind anything, they are still being watched.

Beau and Fjord look at them. And Eodwulf is pretty sure Caduceus watches everything as well, but he does it without crossing his arms and glaring so much.

“Looks like it”, he answers. Caduceus offers him tea and Eodwulf’s first instinct is to decline, but then he remembers that “maker of fine tea” had been very high on the list of descriptors so he takes the cup he is offered while somewhere in the background people start screaming something that sounds like “FLUFFERNUTTER”.

Eodwulf tries the tea. He’s not a fan of tea, but this tea is absolutely delicious and he finds himself impressed.

“I believe this one comes from the Hollburns’ graves. Those remains made the tea grow quite fast, it was impressive.”

Eodwulf blinks at his tea and then at Caduceus. For a second his brain wonders if this statement should register as a threat, but it had been delivered with such honest delight and a sense of pride that Eodwulf discards that feeling.

“What?”, he asks. Caduceus points at the tea.

“Oh, well, my family grows tea on those graves we’re keeping. In case you wanted to ask me again what I am. Or—hm, I think I already mentioned that I am a keeper of graves?”

Caduceus trails off and looks thoughtful and Eodwulf stares at him.

“Keeper of Graves. That make you a follower of the Matron?”, he asks.

Caduceus looks at him and smiles.

“Not quite. My family serves Melora. But we are descended from a champion of the Raven Queen.”

Eodwulf can’t help but wonder if this was some kind of weird joke. But his goddess usually isn’t one for joking.

Eodwulf considers for a second, then he pulls out the raven feather pendant from under his cloak.

Caduceus nods. “So”, he says and smiles widely. “What are you?”

Eodwulf snorts.

“For real?”, he says.

Caduceus’ smile widens.

“For real.”

*

It feels like this has become a sort of game.

“What are you?”

“Moral compass. Middle sibling. Eccentric. Amateur flute player.”

Eodwulf finds that through this question he himself posed the first time, he’s been forced to think more about himself than he feels comfortable with.

“What are you?”

“Decent chess player. Dog person. Sportsman. Only child.”, are the things he says out loud.

“Self-made orphan. Patriot. Volstrucker. Torturer.”, are the things he thinks to himself.

Eodwulf has the impression that Caduceus is somehow aware of the things he doesn’t say.

*

“So. This is the crew you’re running with now?”, Eodwulf asks Bre—Caleb one night before the Mighty Nein will leave with Vess DeRogna to who-knows-where. Neither Astrid nor Eodwulf did get very far with their planned infiltration work. Eodwulf is not even sure how hard they even tried.

It’s very easy to get swept away by the chaos and the weirdness and the complete lack of fear that the group displays when it comes to him and Astrid. They are dangerous people in a lot of ways.

The Mighty Nein are also dangerous people in a very different way. A way that Eodwulf doesn’t know anything about.

“This is my family, ja.”

He says it, just like that, without looking at Eodwulf.

Family.

The word tastes bitter in Eodwulf’s mouth as he leans back in his chair and crosses his arms.

“Weird people”, he says. Caleb huffs.

“You can say that, yes. But they grow on you very quickly”, he answers quietly and with a small, fond smile that makes something inside Eodwulf ache. For a long time Eodwulf pitied Bren for breaking, for not making it, for failing, for being locked away and discarded. Now he realizes that maybe, in a very macabre sort of way, Bren becoming Caleb through failure was the better end of the bargain.

It feels blasphemous to think that.

“The pink one is especially weird”, Eodwulf finds himself saying and he takes a big swig of whiskey from his flask before handing it to Caleb.

“Ja, I noticed that you seem to have a... uh... particular kind of interest in him. And, if I may add, he in you.”

Eodwulf takes the flask back after Caleb drinks. He contemplates the different sorts of feelings inside his gut as the words sink in. Then he tucks it all away very carefully, just as he learned through many years of being in Trent’s presence.

“Still don’t know what he is”, Eodwulf says. Caleb snorts and shakes his head.

“His people are called Firbolg”, he provides.

“Not sure that’s what I mean. Not anymore, at least.”

It seems dangerous to admit that. Caleb turns his head and looks at Eodwulf with a shimmer in his eyes that Eodwulf can’t read. Many years ago he was able to read Bren like an open book, but Caleb is another book entirely.

“You deserve to have some nice things, you know. You deserve friends. A chance of—hm. A chance of peace. A chance for redemption, if you want it.”

Eodwulf gets up and tugs away his flask.

“Pain doesn’t make people. It’s love that makes people. Pain is inconsequential, it’s love that saves them.”

Eodwulf understands the truth in these words now. Bren was broken, Caleb is being healed. Eodwulf doesn’t think that there’s anything left in him that can be saved. Or should be saved.

“Good luck on your journey tomorrow. Don’t die”, Eodwulf says and he leaves Caleb behind.

What are you, he thinks. A sentimental fool.

*

Astrid sits next to him on one of the balconies of her house and looks up at the stars above them. The Mighty Nein have been gone for six days and it has been very quiet.

They sit in silence and share a bottle of whiskey, passing it back and forth instead of words. It’s been like this for many many years that they’ve allowed themselves to just be. Today though, Astrid breaks the silence.

“I’m going to be the one who kills him.”

She says it quietly, without remorse, without indicating that this is a scandalous statement. She says it just how other people would say “I’ll go to bed soon.”.

Eodwulf stops breathing for just a moment. Then he inhales the cool night air and turns his head to look at her.

“Could kill you for treason”, he says. She looks at him and cocks her head slightly, the analyzing gaze of a murderous spy meets its equal in silence.

“I’d love to see you try”, she says. Eodwulf grins. It feels reckless.

“Don’t die”, he says, the same thing he’s said to Caleb before. Astrid regards him for a long moment and Eodwulf takes another sip. “Will you help me or try to stop me?”

Eodwulf considers this for a moment. Would he try to stop Astrid should she try to kill Trent? No. Would he help her? He doesn’t know that either.

“Can’t you just wait for Bren to do it for you?”

“I won’t lose to him again.”

Eodwulf snorts.

Always so competitive.

“That’s some fucked up shit, Astrid.”

“Shut up, Arschloch.”

Eodwulf grins before getting up to stretch. He puts his hands on the railing of Astrid’s balcony and wonders what Caleb’s new family is up to.

Making a new family never came to mind before. It sounds like something out of a fairy tale. While he contemplates the question whether he would help Astrid kill Trent Ikithon, a slow, familiar voice pops up in his head.

“Hey. Uh—Jester told me to send you an update. We’re still alive. Hope you’re good. Got  a new question for you. What will you become?”

The rustling of Astrid’s clothes as she stands up as well somehow tells him that she received a message in her head as well. She steps beside him and puts her hands on the railing next to his.

“They’re persistent”, she says quietly.

Eodwulf nods and inhales.

He doesn’t know what he will become. He didn’t even know that was a question to be asked. The path is clear. It always was.

Pain doesn’t make people.

“Not going to answer?”, she wants to know.

“Don’t have an answer yet.”

It’s unclear to him whether she means her own question or the message Caduceus just sent him.

He answers the sending spell with a simple “I don’t know.”. It takes a few minutes before another message comes in.

“That’s good. Uncertainty is good. It’s the first step in a better direction. I’m going to kill a dragon now. Wish me luck. Good night.”

“I’ll keep you posted on the answer to that question of yours. I’ll see you tomorrow”, he says and leaves Astrid behind on the balcony. Eodwulf thinks about something he hasn’t thought about in a very long time. A priestess in his Matron’s temple once told him: “Death is the only certainty in life.”.

He thinks that Caduceus would agree.

And Eodwulf hopes that the next time he sees that weird, reckless man, he’ll have an answer for him.

[i-am-befuddled]

AMPHIBIA HAS BROKEN ME

I-

I don’t even know what to say. I was sobbing for 20 minutes and my brain has only just begun to form coherent thoughts again. 

Sort of long post warning, and spoilers ahead!!

Ok so first of all, fantastic character designs all around. This scene was impeccable and seeing each of the girl’s characters shine through in how they fought was so satisfying (and how Marcy managed to trip IN SPACE) 

And then the psudo-afterlife with Domino/God??? The foreshadowing that completely went over my head (after the dentist, Anne said “Domino is not just a cat, she is the alpha and the omega, an interdimensional being beyond time and space”) and also now Anne sort of has a countdown for how long she’s gonna live??

But the thing that has been taking up the majority of my brainspace is the time skip!!

YULIVIA CANON

These two mean so much to me as a ship, I immediately was on board even before I knew what the fandom was saying about them. They were in a scene together and and said YES. And can we just appreciate the outfits??? They have managed to achieve the aesthetic goals I desperately want and am torn between. I love them

Speaking of character designs, Polly and Sprig are impeccable (the fan-art for Polly was surprisingly on the nose) and I noticed the stuff Sprig was studying on the wall behind him

I’m gonna cry again

He has Anne from that one bird episode, he’s drawn Calamity Anne, he has the grubhog, her leaf that HE’S SAVED, Domino and Domino 2, a napkin from the Thai Go restaurant, and I think he’s translating a scroll and/or learning English??? I loved every detail in this shot (also getting major Dipper Pines vibes)

Alright. Now onto the girls because I love them all

I adore Sasha’s design here, and Marcy looks just like herself and I love them both. 

AND LET US NOT IGNORE THE BI FLAG AND STICKER AND KEYCHAIN. She probably made those herself bc they’re amphibia exclusives and I love it. 

I don’t have a pic for Anne, but she looks about the same but her hair scrunchie has leaves on it!! Adorable 

*incomprehensible squealing and groaning* this episode was a lot. And I haven’t even covered the goodbyes (which broke me, they were perfectly done), Adrias (on a farm wearing Leif’s leaf, Barrel’s warhammer, and Marcy’s pin), and of course, Loggle no longer being buff (all is right with the world again)

My tremendous appreciation to Matt Braly and everyone on the Amphibia team. I didn’t know what to expect from this funny frog show, but I’m so glad I stayed. I’m excited to continue exploring this show and all the little details that were sprinkled in. (Also anxiously waiting for Marcy’s journal!)

[princesstadashi]

If Disney really had to make the “girl” experiment a pink version of Stitch we could have at least had this:

But NOOOOO

She has to have eyelashes and painted nails and boobs and fur in a pattern specifically made to look like a low necked shirt. And she has to turn the other experiments evil while walking around sexily.

And as I’m watching through the show all of the other experiments I’ve seen so far are noticeably called by masculine pronouns or not gendered at all. So. I’m just saying. There’s a reason I’m a little salty. 

Don’t get me wrong. It’s a great show! But this particular thing and the fact that Angel is the only experiment outside of Stitch who is marketed by Disney.... :/ 

Edit: I have been reminded that there are two other “girl” experiments. First one Bonnie:

And we’ve still got the eyelashes, tiny waist, and hint-of-boob thing going on.

And then there’s Clip:

Clip I will give a pass to. Not a huge fan of the fact that “she has to have a pink bow so the audience will know that she’s a girl and also she ends up being a hairstylist because gender norms” part. But she is an amorphous blob of pure chaos so I will absolutely respect that.

Other experiments I have found thanks to googling from various Lilo and Stitch media:

Gigi: She’s... Well, she looks like a dog. No eyelashes here and only a bow because Myrtle put it on her so I’m letting it pass.

Phoon: Still got that eyelashes thing going on but okay.

Welco. I just... Dear god. WHY???? (I am so uncomfortable right now did they steal fetish art from Deviantart??)

Witch: she looks like she’d make an amazing goth gf, still very cisnormative coded but okay.

Carmen: Angel but buff. (Although I appreciate the fact that they let her be buff so points for that.)

Belle: y’know what? Aside from the eyelashes I really like this design, she looks like any of the other experiments and she’s just really cute so I respect that! :) 

Tickle Tummy: THE FUCK IS THIS PINK ELDRITCH HORROR????

So yeah, this is what Disney have given us to work with. Most of it not great, a few passable ones. But I still stand by the fact that the only one who’s marketed and considered a romantic interest for Stitch is Angel which is still not the best thing ever :/ 

[darkspellmaster]

Chip n' Dale Rescue Rangers movie: Clues? and other things I noticed in the trailer Part 2

So part two of this, and moving forward.

Fan con has a LOT here that is hard to spot but also interesting to spot.

Monkey at the big shot of Fan Con might be a nod to Heebee and Jeebee (tricksters from Chip and Dale's R&R) or the monkeys that work for King louie in Talespin.

What I also caught: Pirates of the Great Lakes banner, April O'Neil cosplayer up front of stage, Wonder-woman look like cosplay, I think maybe King Bob from Recess also in the front by the stage. A Harley Quin from SS with purple hair. No idea who the T-Rex is. Nod to We're Back?

Also dude in white wig and blue jumpsuit way off on the left side of the screen might be a character too. Not sure who they are though.

Moana cosplay, I am not sure who the lion character is dressed as Palpatine, There's a tall buff animated character in the back with a beard, Not sure who he is. Is the lady in the very front of that shot that is clearly an anime character a nod to Crayon Shin Chan? I feel like she is.

Cat creature: Little John's chest from robin hood, Mowgli's pants, Fat Cat's daughter's head? because it has the markings but it has Felicia's (Great Mouse detective's) hair bow, Ralph's arm, Coat I feel like it could be from anyone, the other arm is driving me crazy because I know it's from a show and a character, just can't place it because the shoulder pad and arm are distinctive. I think the cannon is supposed to be a nod to Megatron's cannon, One leg is definitely a robot the other I'm not sure.

Just for the weird fun of it. License plate on the car in the fan con 57 Chevy. Could be a nod to a series or a joke to my mother the car, or something. I just find it interesting that they had that in there.

I'm pretty sure most noticed Gadget here, and she's wearing a black uniform making me think maybe she's working as some spy team thing now. Zipper was wearing a polo shirt, so maybe he's just chilling now.

Has anyone figured out yet what the name of this group is? I'm guessing they're going to be playing a part in the plot as sort of antagonists and there's some ties to another character, namely Prince Jahli. I feel like the guy on the scooter is going to be a pain in the ass to the team, and maybe Gadget is working for them? Or they're just a short group to show what she's been up to.

Okay so the interesting thing here is that Chip has his ear changed into something more akin to pluto or Goofy. And we see this again earlier in the trailer when they're running past the Chevy. So it's clear part of the Fan Con is going to play a larger role in probably the midsection of the movie, or the end of the first act.

Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Apple Jack and Flutter Shy, can be spotted. Not sure where Rarity is, or who the orange pony is.

Not sure who this mouse is and who it's supposed to be, but it looks more loony tunes than Disney. Or maybe Hanna and Barbara.

Apparent we have Paula Abdul and MC Skat Kat, which is interesting. Though I doubt the character will show up again after this.

Continued in part 3 of this.

[romanianwilkinson]

MONSTER CAMP QUOTES STARTERS

A collection of sentence starters from the game Monster Camp. Feel free to change words and pronouns as desired. CONTENT WARNING(S) FOR: Monster Prom/Monster Camp spoilers, suggestive, cursing, crude content

“ I just have it here because [NAME] insisted that I offer it, as a marketing stunt. ”

“ And lastly, super-horny-type players no longer get a charm buff against tsundere types! ”

“ War machines don’t turn me on or anything! ”

“ I don’t wanna be weird, but do you mind if I climb inside of you and play around with your main turret? ”

“ A wine to DIE for, you say? Well, darling, don’t threaten me with a good time! ”

“ This one just says ‘ hmu with that reaper dick, daddy ’. ”

“ You on your phone, as always! Probably making blogposts on your Tik Tok page. ”

“ Yeah, you really don’t want to witness a repeat of the last time [NAME]’s diehard fans went without a selfie for fifteen minutes. My tailbone still hasn’t completely healed. ”

“ Now hold still, this will only hurt for a moment --- ”

“ Yay! You found a shenanigan! ”

“ My poems all have two or three emotions in them, AT LEAST. ”

“ CRYING IS OBVIOUSLY A COMPETITION TO SEE WHO CAN SQUEEZE THE MOST WATER OUT OF THEIR EYES! ”

“ No way, really? The way to WIN at poetry is by LOSING at life? ”

“ I dunno, maybe fall in love with someone who’s married and develop an opioid addiction? ”

“ HELL YEAH, SPEEDRUN! ”

“ It’s morbid, but... kind of romantic? ”

“ GASP! Google+? Are you kidding me? The psychopaths behind that global tragedy are here?! ”

“ Prison has changed me, [NAME]. Would you like to trade me some cigarettes in exchange for my fundamental dignity? ”

“ Undermining the laws of reality, subverting life and death, that’s the kind of stuff my followers expect. But CHEATING? No way. ”

“ Though we are imprisoned in chalk jail, we are free in our hearts. But our hearts are also imprisoned in chalk jail. ”

“ Um, no, I am NOT groveling. I am posing a dignified query to [NAME] that just so happens to be performed on my hands and knees. ”

“ I didn’t know you condoned playing the friend card to get free labor, [NAME]. ”

“ Ah, but saving the world doesn’t put avocado toast on the table. We indie seancers and necromancers need to pay our rent too, you know. ”

“ And as you know, I am illustriously Internet-famous, so if you could shower me with adoration and give me the pizza that would be fabulous. ”

“ Do you wanna fuck the pizza or not? ”

“ Are you ready to go swimming? I must admit, darling, I’ve always wondered what you would look like while... wet.”

“ Did you turn this date into an orgy without consulting me? ”

“ Gosh, I love it when you insult me! Please do it more! ”

“ Now who wants to make a baby? ”

“ What if she puts a curse on me that makes me magically forget the location of the clitoris?! ”

“ Hey, don’t knock wacky decisions that endanger us all! That’s how I always manage to stay a step ahead of my nemeses! ”

“ Oh gods, I’ve killed so many monsters, just for being monsters. This is making me question my entire moral foundation. I NEED MORE THERAPY. ”

“ I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again: fish give better pedicures than people! ”

“ You’re not tricking me into parenting a stupid egg. I’ve never fucked even ONE chicken! The egg is not my son! ”

“ You came to visit me at camp, Daddy! ”

“ Don’t be ridiculous, I know your brand of horny, [NAME], and this ain’t it. ”

“ I thought we both agreed to be nothing but vague and haughtily aloof about our past dalliances. ”

“ Point EAST, compass! EAAAAAAAAST! You dumb fuckboot!!!! POINT! EAST! ”

“ One time I was told a soul’s worst fear was bugs and I inadvertantly sent The Beatles. It happens to the best of us... And the worst of us. ”

“ SOMEDAY I SHALL DEFEAT YOUR FIVE STRANGE FEET! ”

“ Why do you keep suppressing your monster half? Embrace your true nature! ”

“ Wow. I didn't think this was possible, but I guess I was... wrong? About social media? Oh dear God, is this how grandparents feel?!?! Am I a GRANDPARENT?! ”

“ I don’t know! I was relying on my friends to cover up my bold and idiotic statement! ”

“ ... I ate the oars. ”

“ PSYCHE. The ocean can eat my ass. ”

“ So pucker up, [NAME]! I'm about to declare mouth war on your FACE! ”

“ YOU FOOLISHLY FOOLISH FOOL! You're showing our inexperience! YOUR HONOR, THE ENTIRE LEGAL TEAM PLEADS THE FIFTH! ”

“ That's right. I'm talking about a classic Transylvania Hot Tub, a Seth Brundle, and a REVERSE Reverse Romanian Wilkinson. ”

“ Sorry, I was in your ribcage seeing if I could use it to cut strips of crepe paper into confetti and then I got lost in your kidneys. ”

“ There's nothing sexier than a doomed romance between a dating sim player and a hot fictional character. ”

“ That's right! I secretly replaced one of you with a bear while no one was looking, to teach you a valuable lesson about the art of disguise! ”

“ Enchant my armor. I’m going into the lake. ”

“ For VIOLENCE REASONS! ” 

“ This stupid lake monster called me short the other day, but I was too low level to crush him like he deserved. ”

“ That dumb wet dinkhole won't know what hit him! But it will be me! I will hit him! ”

“ No, YOU'RE a fuckshark! Also, what does that even mean?! ”

“ You seriously didn't notice the enormous needles those interns jabbed into your veins as soon as [NAME] got here? “

“ It all makes sense! The Camp Dome is just an elaborate ploy to distract us from the giant mouth that eats campers! “

“ This is the BEST show I've ever seen in my life, which is now at an end! “

“ Am I high, or did he just tell us EXACTLY how to foil his evil scheme? “

“ What, like a few severed heads and visions of my grandpa screaming in horrendous pain are gonna freak me out? Where I'm from, you can buy that stuff at IKEA. “

“ ERROR: Due to the sixth mass extinction, the slaying of leprechauns is inadvisable. “

“ Then why do I have half-finished scarves, decoupage, pot-holders, friendship bracelets, and a taxidermied rabbit in my skeleton? “

“ The wang elemental. ”

“ I also have an uncle who works at Nintendo as a copy machine! “

“ What flavor of ice cream AM I?! Now I gotta know. HA! You know what I should be? 'Pistachio.' Because my outside is HARD, but I'm full of NUT. “

“ I mean, life is a bit like... this sandwich! No, stay with me, I'm going somewhere good with this. “

“ A survival situation without any sexy fun time isn't worth surviving in the first place. “

“ Rut the RUCK?! ”

“ The ' ambulance of the heart ' is just a regular ambulance! Ambulances treat all organs! ”

“ Yeah, that's why I made sure that my so-called ' emotional armor ' was also ' actual armor '. “

“ And being yourself is the key to living your dreams, which is the key to self actualization, which is the key to being really good at sex! “

“ So hot I'd buy that even without free shipping. 10/10, call me some time. “

“ Hi, quick question: does it count as kidnapping if I'm abducting you so you can help me do a thing you already agreed to help with? “

“ I could be wrong, but are you just upset because you DON'T have a skeleton that's inside your body? “

“ I'm gonna get SO FUCKING RELAXED MY HEAD WILL EXPLODE! “

“ Whoah, whoa, hold up. You're fucking my grandma? “

“ No, [NAME], that is a popcorn bag full of more dynamite. Put it down. “

“ I hear that at least 70% of people on Patreon aren't murderers! “

“ If you want cash, just rob banks like the rest of us! “

“ Did it work? Do you feel any less horny? ”

“ FUCK YEAH, LET'S PUNCH THAT MOUTH IN ITS MOUTH! “

“ Yes... incidentally, we are no longer allowed to enter Italy. “

“ Is anyone else turned on right now? ”

“ Yes! Yes! I know what you're feeling! I suddenly see how marrying a corpse isn't okay! “

“ JUST LET ME IMPROVE YOUR SELF ESTEEM, MORTAL! “

“ Look, choose whatever you want, but I'm not responsible for whatever you put in your mouth. ”

[greatghuleh]

My friend barely saw the movie and asked me what I thought about it and my response it's fine...and that that's kind of the problem. It's just a fine movie. And that No Way Home dealt better with the multiverse and with cameos that were worth it.

My friend is also from Europe so they didn't grow up with the Sam Reime movies, and in general aren't that big of a horror movie fan. I'm not either. So that was also another setback for the movie. It was banking on nostalgia, which some of the other movies have done too but this one on a even MORE specific niche. Like, to genuinely LOVE the movie I think you had to have skipped Wanda vision, but a HUGE horror movie buff and enough of a fan of Sam R to really appreciate a lot of what I keep seeing videos point out. Personally, I only know Bruce Campbell from his role in Burn Notice so like...I knew who he was but a lot of people didn't, and so the end credit felt as even more of an FU rather than a funny Deadpool like quib.

It was an okay movie but you're right, that's all it was.

"my response "it's fine"". honestly. Agree. That's basically what I'm telling people. Which bums me out... being such a huge Dr. Strange fan. Bummed that we don't yet have a really balls to the wall amazing Dr. Strange story yet. Both his movies are middle of the road, especially if you're not already a big fan of the character.

That's kind of just like where I am coming out on it. I was hype when I walked out of the theater because it was fun to watch and of course the Clea tease. But the movie is just... okay. It's there. It has some really cool moments and some really amazing set pieces. Does it like... really accomplish anything??? not really. Does it explore any truly new interesting aspects of the characters??? not really.

I did know we were going a more horror-esque route even from the first movie. When they hired Scott Derrickson, a horror director, and he was all pumped to be doing multiple Doctor Strange movies.... and early on constantly teasing Nightmare on his twitter. I KNEW that Feige or MCU higher ups wanted to push a horror element into Doctor Strange at some point. So, getting Raimi in to replace Derrickson made complete sense to me.

A bit too bad all the horror elements were Wanda Maximoff and not a truly scary Doctor Strange villain. With Wanda, I felt she was obviously powerful enough and apparently unhinged enough, but the horror story coming from her and around her felt a bit forced, if i'm honest. It was cool and entertaining to watch but like... why are here in this semi-horror movie with WANDA?

(Side note: I feel like this movie was supposed to be Nightmare or some other Dr. Strange big bad that dabbles in horror before Feige shifted gears and wanted it to be a larger Multiverse story featuring villain!Wanda. and I truly believe that's a big part of why Derrickson took off.)

I'll also be honest, going into this I expected WAY more cool Multiverses and variants. Wow, was I hugely disappointed in that respect.

Also, I didn't stay for the second credits scene because I needed to get the fuck out of there with Clea and Stephen walking into that portal being the last thing I saw. I DID NOT care what else it had to show me. Even Raimi and Bruce Campbell fans left feeling a bit insulted by that second credits scene. I feel like they meant a joke but it left people frustrated, being used to getting teasing content in the credits scenes.

[adozentothedawn]

Got tagged by @serenbach86 for the height comparison thing! Thanks for the tag.^^ This was honestly more interesting than I thought. I didn't really have set heights and have been working on vibes but damn looking at it now...

My apologies for it looking so crowded, you can't really move the figures around. I only used first names to not make it even more cluttered. That said, in order:

Emblyn ix Ensios (Pillars of Eternity): 163 cm/5ft4

Francesca de Luca (Pillars of Eternity): 175 cm/5ft9

Favaen (Pillars of Eternity): 153 cm/5ft

Hildraed Dawnsbane (Pillars of Eternity): 173 cm/5ft8

Broder Tavai (Pillars of Eternity): 194 cm/6ft4

Aelfi (Pillars of Eternity): 87 cm/2ft10

Mani Thilion fan Fürst (Pillars of Eternity): 167 cm/5ft6

Tamary (Pathfinder Kingmaker): 157 cm/5ft2

Arturas (Artie) (Pathfinder Wrath of the Rightous): 181 cm/5ft11

Broder ist so fucking tall, and Aelfi is so fucking tiny. She literally climbs him like a tree and rides around on his shoulders. He calls her squirrel. Also Mani is a lot shorter than Broder than I really expected. The horns probably help a bit, but still. Mani is not amused. I am though.

Francesca is really tall for an elf. Favaen and Tamary are my short queens though. Tamary for the spite factor that comes with it and Favaen for the visual of a short but buff priestess.

And Artie my newest baby! She's a tall girl! I don't think Daeran has a canon height but he's probably a bit shorter than her. Because I like it. Also yes, she has male model here, which is because multiple reasons: 1. Over the course of playing her she has decided that she goes by She/They. Gender is a spectrum and though she is more on the woman side of things, it's not alway quite that simple. (Her portrait technically being of a guy and my own gender thoughts absolutely play into this) and 2. I didn't notice it chose a male model until it was too late.

I'll tag @orime-stories @quenthelicious @brightoncemore @adraveins of you want.^^ My apologies if any of you already did it, I completely lost track of who did and didn't.^^° And anyone else of course feel free to pick up the tag! I do reccomend you do it on mobile though, easier to make a good screenshit there.

[jaycewrites-192000]

Growl: Chapter 9

Warning: This chapter includes sensitive themes such as language, violence, drugging, and sexual assault (nothing too extreme though). Read with caution.

Tag List: @theravencawsatmidnight @etroman @kaariqueen

Your P.O.V

I made my way through the halls to get to my next class, all day I couldn't stop thinking about yesterday. I spent the entire day with Kyotani, it really was like we were on a date, even though we're both just friends. I hated to think of it like that, but it was the truth. And it would stay the truth until I finally confess, which is very unlikely. I already made things awkward enough last night at the restaurant. I can't believe I told some random stranger that we were "dating". God, why did I do that? I'll have to apologize to Kyotani later. Just as I turned the corner to walk down the last hall before my class, I heard someone calling my name.

"Hey, L/n!" I stopped dead in my tracks and grimaced. And just when I was in a pretty good mood too. Not bothering to turn around, I respond. "Not in the mood today Chiharu. So save me the effort of wasting my time and fuck right off." I say before I continue walking. "Oh really? That's pretty bitchy of you L/n, walking away before I could introduce my friends to you."

"What friends? You mean more of Oikawa's annoying ass group of fan..." I trail off as I turned around. Instead of girls at Chiharu's side, there were tall buff guys. They looked liked third years. "Wow Chiharu, totally didn't figure you as the type to date more than one guy at a time." I smirked. Chiharu returned the smug grin. "Can't say the same for you though, huh? I saw you hanging out with that freak that came to your rescue yesterday. I bet Oikawa wouldn't be too happy to hear you were with another man." Before I could remind her for the hundredth time that me and Oikawa were not in a relationship, she continued.

"I mean, whoring yourself out to every guy you meet is bad enough. But going so low as to date someone like that freak? Ha! Now that's just pathetic! Didn't know you needed attention that badly!" I felt a vein pop in my head. I could care less if she made fun of me, but she brought Kyotani into it. He's done nothing wrong. She had no right to talk about him like that. I stormed over to her and grabbed her by her shirt collar. "Listen here bitch! Keep Kyotani's name out of your mouth or I'll-"

"You'll what!? You won't do shit! And besides, I'm not here to fight you. Like I said before, I wanted to introduce my friends." Chiharu snapped her fingers, and two of the third years grabbed onto my arms and pulled me away from her. I was going to scream, but the third one covered my mouth before I got the chance. "Come on, I think it's time we teach this one a lesson." With that, the third year that was keeping me quite, knocked me out cold.

"Ugh...What...What happened?" I groan before slowly opening my eyes. My head was pounding, and I felt dizzy. My vision finally adjusted and I could tell just were I was. I was behind the school near the dumpsters. Why was I hear and...why can't I move!? It was then I noticed my hands were tied together behind my back. All at once it hit me. Chiharu, the third years, she had them knock me out. My breathing picked up rapidly. Why? What were they going to do? I managed to sit myself up, if I could just stand, I can run back inside the school and call for help. But I couldn't, I was so dizzy, it made standing was difficult. I felt something warm hit my knee, blood. I felt it run down my cheek this time, my head must have been bleeding.

"Come on!" I say to myself, attempting to stand once again, but again I couldn't bring myself to stand, I could hardly sit up straight. A hit to the head wouldn't do all this. "They must have drugged me..." I say breathlessly. "Right we did, sweet cheeks." I gasp and look up to see the three third years from before towering over me. "W-what do you want from me? Did that bitch tell you to do this?" I ask, glaring up at the three. "Oh, she's smart. I like em smart." Siad one of the three. "I prefer them more dumb honestly. But she'll do." Said another. "Yeah, Chiharu told us to do this. But really, we would have done it sooner." The one talking to me crouches down to my height.

He looks me up and down, practically undressing me with his eyes. It felt disgusting. "You're pretty cute. How have we not met you before?" He asks. I make sure my legs were firmly pressed together and close to my body. "I prefer to keep to myself so I don't meet people like Chiharu or you scumbags. Now let me go!" I demand. The guy in front of me chuckles. "Sorry, but no. We ain't going anywhere, anytime soon, princess." He moved his finger down my leg. I kicked at his shin roughly, making him groan in pain. The other two third years laughed at his pain.

"Damn, Chiharu was right. You are a bitch." Suddenly his hand was around my throat. He slammed me back down to the ground, hovering over me. "Hey! Make sure you leave some fun for us!" One of them called. "Shut it. There's plenty of her to go around." Says the one on top of me. his free hand tugged at my uniform's tie, loosening my blazer. "No! Stop! Stop it!" I cried.

"See, I knew you didn't give her enough. She's still bitching and moaning." One of the two said, referring to what I only assumed was the drug they slipped me while I was unconscious. "Who cares? No one's gonna hear her." I yelled and cried, but like he said, no one would hear. "Would shut up already!? I promise you'll enjoy it." The guy on top of me purred into my ear. "W-why? Why are you doing this?" I managed to croak out between sniffles.

"Chiharu figured you needed to be taught a lesson. If you want multiple guys, then that's just what you'll get." I sobbed and shut my eyes tightly. 'Someone please help me...' I whimpered in my mind. Just as the man's hand began to go up my skirt, a loud cracking noise filled my ears. Soon after was a cry of pain. My eyes shot opened when I felt the man's grip on my throat loosen. "What the fuck!?" He yelled. Another cracking sound and a cry of pain, then fast approaching footsteps, and before I knew it, the weight of the guy on top of me was gone.

From what I could see, my tears blurring my vision slightly, was someone grabbing the guy and punching him multiple times in the face before kneeing him in the gut and throwing him aside. The person who saved me walked over to the guy's limp body and kicked at it, yelling out in fury while doing so. That yelling closely resembled a man's yells.

After a few more seconds, the person hurried to my side and sat me up. Now that he was closer in view, I could make out who he was. "...Kyotani?" I whimper. "Y/n...I'm sorry I got here late..." He muttered before holding me in his arms tightly. "I'm so sorry." The dizziness that filled my mind had finally gotten the better of me, and once again I fell unconscious.

I woke up again sometime after that, there was something soft underneath my body, and something warm on top. I slowly opened my eyes, narrowing them momentarily due to the brightness of wherever I was. After a minute my eyes adjusted, I was in a room this time. Not just any room, Kyotani's room. "Kyotani." I breathed. Memories of what just happened replayed in my mind, tears begin to fill my eyes. Kyotani saved me. If it wasn't for him, I might have been...I felt sick just thinking about it. I didn't want to think about it. I just wanted Kyotani. Where was Kyotani? "Kyotani..."I whimpered pathetically. From the other side of his bedroom door, I could hear his voice. It was feint, but I could just barely make out what he was saying.

"...She's not coming today, neither am I......Look I'll explain everything later just trust me ok?....Alright, see ya." After a few seconds Kyotani entered, his expression brightening when he saw me. "You're awake!" He rushed to my side. "Are you-Did they-what happend?" He fumbled over his words. I didn't respond, I just stared at him. He's done so much for me. He became my friend when he didn't have to, he helped me study when no one else would, and now he's saved me from a very horrible situation. I rose my shaky hand and gently pressed it to his cheek. "Kyotani...thank you. Thank you so much." I say weakly.

Kyotani put his hand on top of mine. "It was nothing. Y/n, what...tell me what happened. Who were those assholes?" Kyotani asked, repressing the anger in his tone. I removed my hand and turned my head away from him, not wanting him to see me cry. "Y/n?" Kyotani speaks softly. "I really don't want to talk about that right now." I tell him as calmly as possible. I felt Kyotani's thumb gentle wipe away a stray tear on my cheek. "Ok. you don't have to right now. How are you feeling?" He asked. I only shrug, still not look at him. In honesty, I was better. That damned drug wore off, my head was a lot clearer.

I felt something press down at the foot of Kyotani's bed, I glance down to see Killer. His ears were flat against his head and he was whimpering while pawing at my leg. I smile sadly. "Aw, it's ok boy. I'm ok now." I say gently. Kyotani pet killer's head a few times. "He went crazy when he saw me carry you in here. I'm glad my mom and sister weren't here to see it. They would have started pestering me." I glanced over at him. "Asking why I'm carrying an unconscious girl into the house, then having to explain what I just had to fucking see..." His hand moved away from Killer's head, and covered his eyes. He was shaking. I sat up and wrapped my arms around him. "You don't have to talk about it either." I say softly.

His arms found their way around my waist. "Right..." I sniffled. We both sat in silence, just enjoying being in each others embrace. After a moment or two, I finally spoke. "Who were you on the phone with?" I asked. "Iwaizumi. He wanted to know why we didn't show up to practice." I shifted my position to get more comfortable. Kyotani picked this up and laid me back down on the bed before crawling in next to me. He draped his arm over me and I laid my head on his chest. "I won't say a word about this to him or anyone, until you're ready. Until then, I'll be here for you ok?" I nod and close my eyes, breathing in Kyotani's scent. He was so warm. "Thank you Kyotani."

"This will be selfish of me to ask but, can I stay here with you tonight? I don't want to be alone right now." Kyotani rubbed my back softly. "Of course you can." I thanked him again before texting my mother, letting her know I'll be staying with Iwaizumi. I wouldn't have lied but my mom trusted him the most. 'Hope you don't mind Iwaizumi.' I set my phone aside and snuggled closer to Kyotani.

Previous | Next

[jikookuntold]

Jungkook Being Open about Himself

TW: This is a heavy analysis and contains deep theories and some conspiracy theories. If you don’t feel comfortable about gender and sexual orientation discussions, this post is not for you. I’m not going to talk about any ship in this post, it’s all about Jungkook and the image this fandom made of him.

Enough talking let’s get the bread!

The Wrong Image

After spending almost three years on ARMY-Twitter and other apps like YouTube or Instagram, I came to the conclusion that the majority of this fandom has this image of a masculine, bad boy, cold-hearted heterosexual Jungkook in their minds, something we can even consider as toxic masculinity. But is it true? Is this what he has tried to show us all these years? We can’t deny the fact that he wants to look mature and he doesn’t like to be called a baby, he made this clear many times despite doing some aegyo for the sake of ARMY’s satisfaction but his masculine and feminine sides are another story.

Masculine or Feminine?

Wearing makeup or jewelry on stage for an artist, can’t be considered as a feminine attitude but when someone does this on daily basis and recommends forgetting about the gender stereotypes it mean they don’t care about gender and “Not Caring about Gender” is a feminine attitude. Jungkook buys his clothes from local gender-neutral brands, he likes makeup and he’s called himself pretty many times. He said the great style is wearing what you want regardless of gender.

In Feb 2021 Elle Korea wrote: “Most of Jungkook's favorite fragrance products have sweet & lovely scents regarded feminine.” He is a sensitive and emotional person and he cries very easily. There are so many discussions about feminine body-language signs which all do apply on him but I don’t discuss them here because they are mostly not deterministic. Anyways, can we all agree getting tattoos or being buff doesn’t make you masculine? Jeon Jungkook has embraced his feminine side and he is far from toxic masculine qualities inside and out.

Sexual Direction?

I’m not in a position to discuss someone’s sexual orientation when they haven’t talked about it themselves but it surprises me how the majority of this fandom is so sure about Jungkook being heterosexual. In my opinion, this mindset comes from the image of him being super-masculine and being associated with girls in the early years after debut. We all know he had one (or two?) girlfriends before the age of 17 and he actually was open about it. In American Hustle Life he talked about how at some point he felt dating and not dating that girl doesn’t make any difference for him and he believes all girls are the same.

We all know how this industry works and idols never open up about their relationships, especially at such young age but Jungkook wasn’t hesitant, despite being a shy and introverted person. I’m not claiming to know him but I know him enough to believe what he says is the truth. This man never lies, maybe he won’t disclose every aspect of his life but when he speaks up he is telling the truth and nothing else. He could deny or ignore those dating rumors of early debut years but he wasn’t afraid of confirming them and showing his real self.

While I’m speaking about American Hustle Life, I should refer to another thing related to the topic. (I personally believe this AHS had such a big impact on all the members’ growth and not just Jungkook) When Jungkook was chilling near the pool with Yoongi, he told him about a woman he saw there who had a big tattoo on his back and he said he wants to get a tattoo. Yoongi believed this act will disappoint ARMY but Jungkook didn’t agree and said: “If they love us, they won’t mind.” Jungkook wants to be himself and shows his real self to us and believes if our love for him is real we would accept him as the way he is.

In my opinion, somewhere around Jungkook's 17th birthday something changed in him. This change has started earlier but at this period (Danger Era), it became more detectable. I'm not saying that he wasn't like this before, on the contrary, he was always like this, he was born with it but fully acknowledging it and embracing it took time for him. None of us had known or accepted ourselves in our teenage years and we tried and pushed lots of things to find our true nature. I believe the same happened for Jungkook and it was way harder for him because of the situation he was in.

Anyways, in late 2014 and especially 2015, the changes in his attitudes and manners were too visible to stay unnoticed by ARMY (I have to declare skinship and fanservice for the cameras are not my point, In this post, I have tried to draw a line between his work as an idol and his life as a person and my emphasis is on the latter part). He started to suggest openly gay artists’ works in his tweets. He even did cover those songs and used them for his G.C.F videos. If you have read the lyrics of the songs he suggests, covers, or uses for his works, you’d notice that all the pronouns are gender-neutral or male (he). The most interesting thing was when he eliminated the word "girl" from the lyrics of Savage Love but didn't do anything with the f word. He has used LGBTQ+ symbols several times, He has read gay novels, He named his flower bouquet “Various types of love” Now think about it again; does it make sense to consider him as a heterosexual?

Rumors...

Most of you know about the incidents when BTS had their short break in the summer of 2019. Jungkook started to get tattoos and when he was on a trip, two pictures of him got leaked and rumors of Jungkook and a girl (I'm going to call her person B) went viral. I'm not going to analyze those pictures or the rumors because BigHit’s statement did seal the deal for me, I knew Jungkook wouldn't lie or hide anything about it. If he had dated that girl or anyone else it was his business and when he denied it, I was 100% sure he is telling the truth but apparently it wasn't the case for the others. The pictures weren’t showing anything intimate or controversial, but since it was a boy/girl interaction they made a huge deal of it (Remember in a heteronormative world, boys and girls can’t be just friends!) The rumors haven’t died down after almost two years and they are using this to keep their fantasies of heterosexual Jungkook alive.

As someone familiar with this industry for more than a decade, I know they can’t let any of the popular fantasies to die, no matter it’s the fantasy of gay shippers or straight shipper or Y/N’s, no one has to be disappointed. Fantasy of Jungkook being straight was dying down in the middle of 2019. But how did that happen? Of course, any ship moments or interaction between members never been taken seriously. It would be interesting if you know the situation became serious just a few days before the person B incident. That day, an insulting and homophobic private conversation from one of the most infamous fansites of Jungkook got leaked and it almost outed him as someone who isn’t in the hetero world.

When ARMY called out this fansite for her toxic behavior and insult towards Jungkook, she threatened them to ruin his life and we knew she could do that because she had ruined other idols’ lives before that. Just one week after that the person B incident happened and the news of Jungkook having a girlfriend went viral. I’m aware the whole situation could be a coincidence but the timing of the events and many other facts prove it was a conspiracy to frame Jungkook and ruin his image and beside that, many people benefited from it.

Person B acted as shady as she could in this situation but I'm not going to go there because this post has become long enough already. Firstly we thought she is a victim of this conspiracy and pitied her but her subsequent acts proved otherwise. She did benefit from these rumors much more than anyone expected and did everything to stay on the top news.

Enough talking of person B, let’s speak about the fansite lady. Her actions were terrible enough to get blacklisted by BigHit but surprisingly she didn't and after that, she took part in Japan fan-meetings, Melon, and Mama (or other programs I’m not aware of) until the COVID19 made everything canceled. Many people know she is more of a saesang than a fansite, and saesangs have a close community and they know each other very well. On the other side, we know many companies hire saesangs for their idols to find out about their private lives and have more control on them without being strict. And this is why I believe BigHit can be the mastermind behind all of this.  

Why am I so pessimistic about BigHit? Think about the statement they made to deny the rumors, I know this statement was made with Jungkook's permission but he didn't write it himself obviously and the wording wasn't the wisest. We heard months later from the guesthouse manager that Jungkook went there with his own manager but they didn't even mention it in the statement. Why? Let’s not forget the worst, when they made him apologize in the last episode of BV4. That was unnecessary either and brought back everything to the surface when it was about to die down. I know they support the members and they try to protect them in every way but that statement always makes me think of them as a shady and hypocritical company like any other company in Kpop. I know BigHit benefited from these rumors and I think BHxFansitexSaesang collab is a possible scenario.

What did Jungkook do after all of these incidents? Obviously, he had no choice other than to accept his fate but the fact is we failed him as fans. He loved and trusted us from the bottom of his heart, he showed his true self to us, he gave us lots of hints about himself but the moment he sat next to a girl, everyone forgot everything. We disappointed him and he came to the conclusion that no matter what he does, the fans will think what they want to think.

If you were patient enough to reach this far in this post I’m gonna salute you but you probably think I’m delusional and went too far in my theories (I had the TW at the beginning of the post and I had to get all this off my chest lol) but for the last thing I’m going to quote and analyze something Jungkook mentioned in JHope’s Vlive after the release of CNS.

“I never thought I would fall for a man”

This was his very first public appearance of Jungkook after the person B incident and managing to say these words in this situation was definitely meaningful and remarkably wise. What did he mean by this? Did he have to state he never thinks he can be gay at the exact time when the rumors of him being with a girl were breaking the internet? No, it doesn’t make sense at all. In fact, it was the exact opposite, he said that to make it more clear and chastise us for not getting him all these year. His face was very expressive while saying this and considering their conversation topic (watching JHope’s dance) I believe he had this statement ready for days and he left it to us to understand him or ignore him again.

The End.  

[childrenofthenightt]

only the black rose (chapter 5)

pairing: jimmy page x layla porter (oc)

warnings: talks of parental abandonment, off-scene injury, drug use (legal!), fluff, and me waxing poetic about one of my favourite books. and more fluff.

words: 3.1k

summary: in the blink of an eye, it’s 1975 and layla’s suddenly joining led zeppelin for their north american tour. throughout the chaos, the band take a liking to her, she builds friendships with the boys, and love blossoms. but all good things must come to an end.

author’s note: this one wrote itself. i expected to take longer with it cause of this. this is the start of the Chaos seen in the 1975 North American tour, so hold onto your hats and enjoy! congrats! you’ve unlocked layla’s tragic backstory! unbeta’d as always, and here’s the link to the playlist :)

masterlist

playlist

chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

----------

Soon enough, the band make their way home, basking in the golden glow of a couple of excellent shows. It’s only a matter of days until the start of the North American tour, and the excitement is palpable. The boys find themselves at the studio, running through some last-minute tour details, accompanied by a certain brunette firecracker, who sits reading comfortably in the lobby.

Layla, sitting on a luxurious couch just outside of the meeting room, is drowning in a hardcover book, consuming every word at a ravenous pace. The sound of pages flipping periodically is accompanied by the light din of voices detailing the upcoming tour. Lost in the story in front of her, she is surprised when she hears a person clearing their throat, seemingly right in front of her. Looking up, she spots the secretary of Swan Song Records, a woman with glasses and long brown hair ran through with gray, pinned up in a low bun. Light freckles dusted her cheeks. Judging by the crow’s feet at the corners of her hazel eyes, the secretary had to have been older than Layla, perhaps around 50, though her bright smile gave the impression of youth.  

“Sorry to interrupt, Miss… I just couldn’t help but notice the book you were reading. I don’t see many fans of the classics around here, especially ones so young.”

Recovering from the shock of being ripped out of the hypnotising story she was wrapped up in, Layla gestures to the seat next to her. With a bright smile, the secretary smoothes down her pencil skirt, and sits down.

“My mother was a literature buff, and it seems she’s passed that down to me! My name’s Layla. You’re Evelyn, right?”

“Y-Yes, I am! How do you…”

“Well, I had to put a name to the lovely secretary that gives me a smile whenever I see her. Makes my day, if I’m being honest.”

“You’re too sweet, darling,” Evelyn says, lips turning up warmly, eyes dancing with joy. “If I may, what are your thoughts on the book? It’s a personal favourite of mine, and it’s always nice to hear new opinions.”

“Well,” Layla starts, lighting up as she speaks. “Wilde’s language paints such a beautiful, vivid picture, and the characters are so interesting, even if they aren’t morally likeable, most of the time. They make mistakes… Many mistakes… but we sympathize with them.”

At this, Layla cups her hand around her mouth, whispering to Evelyn mischievously, as if what she was about to say was the world’s most important secret.

“It’s a favourite of mine too.”

The two women laugh, Evelyn’s hand falling across Layla’s arm, a comforting, grounding weight. Evelyn, with a warm smile gracing her face, crow’s feet as prominent as ever, sends a pang of longing into Layla’s heart. Not for love, but for her old life. Her friends worried out of their minds over her disappearance; her mother, left alone not once, but twice. Her father had left when she was a child, and it had been her and her mother ever since. Layla learned to put up walls, so that she’d never be hurt like that again. They all leave in the end. It’s better that way. Better not to get attached. Better not to get hurt.

“That’s a lovely interpretation, Layla. You know,” Evelyn says, interrupting Layla’s train of thought. “For someone so young, you have an old soul. Wise beyond your years, for sure.”

“You have no idea…”

“Well, I must get to work, darling,” Evelyn claps her hands together, and stands up, resting a hand on Layla’s arm once more. “I’d love to chat again, though. Such refreshing opinions from such a young woman. I’ll let you get back to your book.”

“I would love to! We’ll make plans soon, I promise. Have a wonderful day, Evelyn!” With that, Layla opens the novel, and is taken once again by the current of the story. Minutes pass, until Layla is interrupted once more, this time by a soft press of lips against the crown of her head.

“Everything alright, Layla?”

“Of course, Jim,” Layla says, reaching out to grasp Jimmy’s hand in return. “How did the meeting go?”

“Well, you were right outside the door, I’m surprised you didn’t eavesdrop,” He takes a seat beside her, and reaches down to tap at the book still nestled in Layla’s hand, her finger keeping the page. “You were too engrossed in this, I bet. What are you reading anyways?”

Layla lifts the book to show the cover, which is a slightly worn navy blue, with golden accents in the form of small droplets. In metallic lettering, read ‘The Picture of Dorian Gray’.

“Oscar Wilde, hey? Wouldn’t have pegged you for a lover of the classics.”

“I spent my teenage years with Austen and Dickens, after all.”

“I didn’t think you were that old.”

Layla rolls her eyes, a fond look upon her features. Smiling at the man in front of her, she puts a hand to his cheek.

“Yeah, I’m a real cradle-robber.”

“Just make sure my mum doesn’t hear about this relationship: she’ll have a fit.”

“I’ll be careful, angel,” Layla laughs, putting a pensive finger to her chin. “Hey, Jimmy? Do you have a good relationship with your parents?” Jimmy smiles wide at the question and nods, dark curls bobbing at the movement. He absentmindedly takes Layla’s hand in his, rubbing his thumb in soft circles across her wrist.

“My parents… They’ve always been very supportive of me in every way, and I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to find a way to thank them,” Jimmy squeezes her hand briefly, meeting her eyes. “You know, I bet they’d love you.”

“Do you really think so?” Layla’s cheeks grow warm, and her lips tilt upwards in a smile that is uncharacteristically shy.

“Of course I do, petal,” Jimmy says, pushing a fallen lock of hair behind Layla’s ear, his touch featherlight. “How about you? What are your parents like?”

“Well… My dad… He left us when I was young, so it’s been me and my mom ever since,” This is marked with a moment of silence, and Layla’s eyes meet her shoes, pointedly not looking at Jimmy. “My mom’s probably the strongest person I’ve ever met, and I truly can’t thank her enough for everything she’s done for me. She’s my best friend.”

The silence continues, until Layla feels a calloused finger at her jaw, lifting her chin. Finally flicking her eyes up to gaze at the guitarist, she’s shocked by the concern and sadness she sees in those emerald green eyes.

“Petal, I…”

“Jim, it’s fine. It—”

“It’s not fine, Layla. It’s not. I’m so sorry, you didn’t deserve that. Either of you.” Jimmy pulls her into a tight hug, long arms wrapping around her, making her feel safe. They stay like this for what feels like hours, breaking apart slowly.

“Jimmy, I… Thank you.”

“Of course. Now, how about you read me some of that book of yours?”

Layla laughs brightly, albeit a little watery, and smiles at Jimmy, eyes shining with gratitude. Shuffling, she positions herself in his lap, legs hanging off the end of the couch as his arm comes to rest across her back, holding her steady against his chest. She opens the book, dog-earing the corner of the page she was reading, before flipping back to the start.

“Petal, as much as I like this, I thought we were gonna take it slow? I don’t think public places are the best idea to… Well…”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jimmy,” Layla says, smirk gracing her face as she speaks. “You just make a very comfortable chair.”

Jimmy’s laugh is music to her ears, and she presses a light kiss to his cheek. Focusing on the book in her hand, she begins to read:

“The studio was filled with the rich odour of roses, and when the light summer wind stirred amidst the trees of the garden, there came through the open door the heavy scent of the lilac, or the more delicate perfume of the pink-flowering thorn.”

----------

‘Was it all true? Had the portrait really changed? Or had it been simply his own imagination that had made him see a look of evil where there had been a look of joy?’

The next day had arrived, and Layla sits at her kitchen table, enraptured once again by the writings of Oscar Wilde. The words on the page enchant her, and she has no desire to put the novel down anytime soon. She’d have to tell Evelyn all about it, the next time she sees her.

‘Surely a painted canvas could not alter? The thing was absurd. It would serve as a tale to tell Basil some day. It would make him smile. And, yet, how vivid was his recollection—’

A shrill ringing pulls her out of the carefully crafted narrative of Dorian Gray. Layla huffs, annoyed at the intrusion, and moves to pick up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Layla! Hi, good to hear from you, hope you’re having a great day so far! Lovely weather we’re having, hey?” The slightly nasal voice of one Robert Plant, crackles through the phone, and Layla sighs at his exuberance.

“Robert, hey. What is it?”

“Uh… Please don’t freak out. It’s really not that bad, and everyone is… mostly… fine?”

“Rob—”

This is followed by a noise in the background, a sort of crackle, as if Robert had shifted the phone to his other hand. Layla can hear the way his breath picks up, the way panic seeps into his voice. “Just a heads up that we’ll be at your place in about… 10 minutes! See you then!”

“What is going on? I was reading, I’m really not in the mood for—”

Another crackle, and a sigh from Robert’s end of the line. Layla runs a hand through her hair, biting her lip in an attempt to quell the panic rising in her throat.

“Promise me you won’t freak out, little dove.”

Layla exhales sharply through her nose, unimpressed at the plea of the man on the other line. Coiling the telephone cord around her finger to calm her nerves, she responds.

“Fine, I’m not gonna freak out. Now, tell me what happened.”

“Well… Um… Jimmy, well, he kinda… got his… finger slammed in a train door?”

“...”

“Layla? Are you still there?”

“How?!”

“I told you not to freak out…”

“Robert!” Layla exclaims, concern painted clearly on her flushed face.

“Okay, okay, he told us he was holding the door open for someone on the way to Swan Song, and well… You know the rest.”

“Is he going to be okay?”

Another sigh sounds from the other line, and Layla waits in anticipation for his response, growing anxious with each passing moment. Finally, she hears the man’s response, and deflates with relief, sinking into the chair beside her.

“He should be fine. Like I said before, we’re gonna come get you right away. He’ll be okay, Layla.”

“Okay…Robert?”

“Yes, little dove?

“Thank you.”

“Of course,” Robert chuckles lightly, bringing a smile to Layla’s face, the undercurrent of anxiety still coursing through her. She thinks it will stay that way, until she sees Jimmy, makes sure he’s okay. “We’ll be there in 10 minutes. Sit tight, Layla.”

Layla sits at the kitchen table, biting her thumbnail, mind elsewhere, until she hears the telltale sound of a car pulling up, engine cutting out. Flying out the door, She spots Jonesy in the driver’s seat, Bonzo next to him, with Robert in the back. Opening the door, she sits next to the blond, and he gazes over at her, putting a hand to her shoulder. Sympathy flashes across his face as he takes in the shocked look Layla’s sporting.

“He’ll be okay, Layla. He will.”

“Robert, I… Jonesy, please, just drive?”

“Right.”

The engine rumbles to life, and they’re off, no doubt speeding to whatever hospital Jimmy’s holed up in. Layla lets her thoughts drift to Jimmy. She wonders how he’s doing, if he’s in any pain, if they’re treating him well. She’s distracted enough that she barely feels Robert’s hand, warm and comforting, on her knee. Layla is snapped out of her thoughts by a particularly sharp turn, and she looks up at Robert, her eyes brimming with tears.

“Rob… What if he’s… not okay? It was his finger. That means that he might not be able to play, if it’s bad enough,” She stammers, eyes frantic in their search of the blond’s face. “His guitar is his life, and—”

“Layla, calm down. It’ll be okay. It won’t do us any good to think like that.” Robert leans over, throwing his arm around her shoulder as best he could in the cramped car. To his surprise, she leans into him, resting her head on his shoulder. Layla unconsciously brings a hand up to bite her thumbnail, and catching the action, Robert places his hand on hers, pushing it back down to rest in her lap. They stay that way until the car rolls to a stop in the hospital parking lot. Layla lifts her head from Robert’s shoulder with breakneck speed, scrambling out of the car.

“Layla, wait!” Jonesy calls out, running after the woman, who dashes through the door. Robert and Bonzo catch up, just as Layla reaches the front desk, panting from exertion. The nurse on shift looks at her, eyes wide, shocked at the display.

“Excuse me, love,” Bonzo says, tucking Layla under his arm as he speaks to the nurse. “We’re looking for James Page? He was brought in for a fractured finger, I believe?”

“...Yes, right. What is your relationship with the patient?”

“We’re his bandmates, we can call our manager if you need proof. Please, we just need to see if he’s okay.”

The nurse eyes the group dubiously, and grabs the chart sitting next to her, looking through it. Glancing at the group again, she points behind them, to a room packed with seats, posters and pamphlets lining the walls.

“It seems that Mr. Page is still with the doctor getting X-rayed, so I’m going to need you to take a seat in the waiting area. Give that manager of yours a call, and we’ll see what we can do for you.”

“Thank you, love.” Bonzo says, as he herds the group over to the soft, patterned armchairs, plopping down with a sigh. Jonesy excuses himself to make a phone call to Peter, the others left waiting for news that won’t come fast enough.

Jimmy has to be okay. He has to.

----------

“For James Page?” The nurse’s voice rings out across the waiting area, and the group shoot up from their seats, stiff backs groaning in protest. “Follow me.”

The nurse leads them through a labyrinth of hallways, stopping finally at a room with a large 164 pasted on the closed door. Through the window looking into the room, Layla spots Jimmy asleep under the covers, his hands atop the sheets, resting on his stomach. He looks peaceful, she thinks, like he’s devoid of pain. If she couldn’t see the injured hand at all, she’d have thought he was perfectly fine.

The group finally walk into the room, the sharp smell of antiseptic burning their nostrils. Hearing the click of the door opening, Jimmy opens his eyes, pupils blown wide. His irises are almost black, and he sends them a dopey smile, a giggle bursting out.

“Hey, guys. Fancy seeing you all here.” Jimmy slurs, laughing harder now, as though he had told the most hilarious joke in the world. The boys join in, amused by the antics of their guitarist. Layla hangs back, staring at Jimmy, concern clear on her face. She had spotted the injured finger on the way in, which was already bruised a deep purple, the fingernail completely blackened.

“They give you the good stuff, Pagey?”

“You know it, Jonesy.” Jimmy shoots the bassist a sloppy wink, and the group erupts into soft laughter once more. Taking a dazed glance around the room, the raven-haired man pouts, completely endearing in his drugged state. “Hey… where’s Layla?”

Peter, who had been standing next to the bed, moves aside, and glassy green met warm brown. The guitarist smiles softly, relaxing back into the pillows. He sticks out his uninjured hand, and she walks closer to take it. Never lessening her grip, Layla threads the fingers of her free hand through Jimmy’s messy curls, and looks down at him fondly.

“How’re you doing, champ?”

“Good, now that you’re here. I would kiss you right now… if I wasn’t seeing two of you.”

“They must have him on the really good stuff…” Layla throws over her shoulder, looking back at the injured guitarist. He’s looking up at her with unabashed affection, and she can’t help but blush at the adoration in his gaze.

“Sorry to interrupt,” comes from the open doorway, as Jimmy’s doctor steps through. “I’m Dr. Vane, I treated James when he came in. If you’d kindly step out for a moment, I’d like to go over his prognosis.”

The boys file out of the room, and Layla goes to follow, stopped in her tracks by Jimmy tugging her back towards him with a whimper. She gives in, sinking back down in the chair at his bedside.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, Jimmy. I was so scared when Robert called. I thought...”

“I’m glad you’re here, petal. Now, come into bed with me. I want to see you better.” Jimmy mutters, scooting over to make room for her to fit in the small hospital bed. Layla laughs, nodding, and crawls in beside him, careful not to hurt him. She turns on her side, her hand landing in his hair again. Jimmy looks up at her, pupils still dilated, and presses a quick peck on her lips, giggling anew.

“You’re so beautiful. Have I ever told you that you’re beautiful? ‘Cause you are.” He insists, slurred speech returning in full force, his eyes fluttering closed.

“Go to sleep, Jimmy. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

He hums softy in response and a few seconds later, Jimmy’s breathing evens out. He’s dead to the world. Through the door left ajar, Layla can hear snippets of the conversation with the doctor.

“... Fractured the tip of his finger… At least a month.”

“Will he be able to play anytime soon?” That was Peter, voice soft with worry for the frail man in the hospital bed.

“He should rest… Not good to put too much strain on it… Keeping him here until the anaesthetic wears off.”

Tuning them out, Layla looks down at the man sleeping beside her. His hair is matted on one side of his head, and he snores louder than he’d ever admit, but he looks peaceful. He’s not in any pain, and that’s enough for Layla. She drifts off, as the sound of footsteps against the floor draw near. Her tired eyes open to slits, and she sees a shadow with dark, shoulder-length and a beard. It must be Bonzo, she thinks. The last thing Layla hears before succumbing to the exhaustion that plagues her, is the drummer’s soothing voice, hushed to a whisper.

“Let them sleep.”

----------

taglist: @jimmys-zeppelin @salixfragilis @timetraveller4 (let me know if you want to be added!)

[carmenxjulia]

I put together a transcript of the 2 hour Q&A Interview the Carmen Sandiego Discord did with Showrunner Duane Capizzi. All of the questions were submitted by server members. You can read everything below the break!

Duane Capizzi:

Hi there!

Am I in? Is this thing on?

PizzaHorse:

Hi, welcome!

Yep, you're in the right place!

Duane Capizzi:

Sorry I'm late, I was wandering around some empty Discord hallways looking for the right room haha

PizzaHorse:

No worries. Let's get started!

Who is your favorite character?

Duane Capizzi:

Moose Boy!

KIDDING!

Alright, how to NOT get myself in trouble if my answer isn't "Carmen" haha.

But really, they are ALL my babies.

So I know it's going to sound like a cop out to some that I can't pick just one. But hmm, some for instances...

I love that she's so morally evolved at such a young age; her ability to always take the high road and never lower herself; her drive and conviction and dedication. Her ability to kick serious booty and look good while doing it. Her progressive values, her fashion sense. I could go on and on. But then there's Shadowsan and his arc; Chase and his. Julia, who's every bit as strong as Carmen but shows it in different ways. The Cleaners don't get enough love.

I'll close that question with an anecdote about The Cleaners ...

I love that all our characters are embraced and that everyone seems to have favorites. Our sound engineer Marcel is a pretty serious guy: he has a serious job that takes high levels of focus and attention. He's always deeply focused and not prone to small talk. Anyway, we were in the middle of our first or second sound mix, and he suddenly stops in the middle and turns around to face us. I'm thinking, "uh oh, we're giving too many notes." That's when I notice he's freeze framed the Cleaners. He says "I really like these guys." Then he turns around, hits play and gets back to work.

PizzaHorse:

What was the biggest challenge for coming up with new stories and plot for the reboot?

Duane Capizzi:

THE biggest? Sigh. I'm not sure I could come up with just one. Plotting is always challenging and we had the brain trust of the room, our trusty white board, and writer assistant to keep the threads of the ongoing storyline together. I think the single biggest ONGOING challenge was tracking which character knew what at any given time.

The caper part was challenging - coming up with new capers and keeping them interesting and fresh. But, it was the characters and their interactions that kept things fresh and interesting. Another museum heist? That's okay - Chase is on the case and he gets to interact with "X" this time (for instance).

There were also some episodes - Duke of Vermeer and Crackle Goes Kiwi come to mind - where there was SO MUCH SET UP needed to get the payoffs to work. I was really worried about too much talk/too much detail. Very "Swiss watch!" It took a lot of work to make sure it all clicked and was clear - hopefully it seems effortless on screen but I can't say there wasn't some sweat and the occasional tear (mostly from me - I'm a big cry baby

But really, what made it fun was that we had so many buckets to draw from: sometimes a story germ initially began with a character idea; sometimes it was inspired by global location; sometimes it was a clever way to update or reimagine an idea from old Carmen lore. Usually, it was some combination of all of the above!

PizzaHorse:

What was your favorite scene to write?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we have a theme here! "How can I pick just one ...?"

As a film buff, I got to indulge in some serious fan nerdery on this show: I got to write spy movies, yakuza movies, spaghetti neo-westerns (though turning it on its head: spaghetti westerns usually involve REVENGE and because of Carmen's character make up, this was sort of anti-revenge).

Is writing coming up with the idea or typing it? Haha. An "if a tree falls in the forest" question. The writing team and I had so many cathartic "that's how it goes" in the room. But on my own, writing the Pilot, was a very inspiring time for me: I remember laughing out loud the moment I thought of Chase falling on his own car (in part because of doing my spin on "that trope" that we've seen in so many hard boiled movies recently). But also how emotional I got when I imagined the simple but potent image of Black Sheep deciding to take her destiny into her own hands and walk that long corridor to the Faculty who we were about to meet for the first time.

I think I've cited this in another interview, but there was a period where I was completely immersed in Chase's arc and the scene where he would crack the location of VILE island ... by listening to Julia in a dream ... was a big one for me. It revealed he was finally open to admitting he needed Julia more than he would ever admit - yet, it was his own subconscious speaking.

The next morning, after cracking that scene, I bumped into Raf Petardi (voice of Chase) ... at the supermarket! It was very strange and hilarious

PizzaHorse:

Did you scrap any lengthy or funny scenes that you would be able to share?

Duane Capizzi:

With few exceptions, most scene cuts are done at the script stage so that the story board team doesn't waste effort over boarding. A variety of trims to any script are common, but they are usually for the better

The easier question to answer might be scenes were part of our "wish list" at writer room stage, but never made it to story or script. I hesitate to go too deep here (in the event that we might ever do more Carmen episodes in this canon - I'm not giving up hope). And there were cases where things we wanted to do earlier in the series wound up getting nixed or not fitting for whatever reason, but we got them in later - USUALLY FOR THE BETTER. So there's sort of a reverse Murphy's Law/rule of good fortune somehow in these things. But some fun things that didn't make it into the show, that leap to mind were: a Bollywood dance sequence (!). A Vegas caper involving Brunt wanting to steal an Elvis jumpsuit against the backdrop of an Elvis impersonator convention. We also thought it would be neat to get Maelstrom imprisoned so that Julia could interrogate him and he would play mind games with her - very Lector/Clarice!

PizzaHorse:

Were there any different treatments of Carmen you pitched before settling on the one we ended up with?

Duane Capizzi:

I was one of several "pitches" that I'm sure HMH heard before running with my version. But I can honestly say I've never pitched anything as fully formed: the take on Carmen felt so right to me, and clearly HMH and by extension Netflix agreed

I'll answer your question with an anecdote: I had the entire Pilot pretty well worked out, and pitched it in the first meeting. But one key thing that changed (much for the better!), simply because it wouldn't have fit without slogging things down ...

In my Pilot pitch, Black Sheep's escape on the boat was off screen: we see Shadowsan corner her, then we cut away. The rest of the Faculty show up to find SS's broken sword on the rocks, and are led to believe BS killed him (!). In the present, Crackle points his weapon at Carmen and prepares to pull the trigger. We know that Chase is on the way and may rescue her. The compartment door opens to reveal - not Chase - but Shadowsan! Big surprise! Then we cut back to BS's escape and find out what really transpired etc etc.

Crazy, right? SS would have been hanging out with the gang in season 1; we might not have gotten to 203 with his back story, since his sword was broken and he couldn't return it. Just one of those magical things where "things work out" the way they are supposed to. THAT SAID, it made for a heckuva pitch

PizzaHorse:

Are there any characters that ended up taking a direction you didn't initially anticipate?

Duane Capizzi:

GRAY.

I didn't know we'd make him amnesiac when I wrote the Pilot, that was something we came up with in our first week Writer Room.

And even then, when it became clear he'd be a key piece of the bigger puzzle, we didn't know how exactly (mostly the Season 4 stuff).

We did get very deep with a version where 404 ended with his protective streak for Carmen kicking into high gear, and they would be fighting off Vile Guards back to back in perfect tandem. Then, having chosen Carmen over VILE, it was Carmen who actually orchestrates Gray going "off grid" so that VILE can never find him again. Funny, I know that is arguably the version of Gray's arc that many fans might have preferred seeing. But in the tradition of spy thrillers and film noir, and for a lone wolf character like Carmen who is focused on her life mission and not romance, we stand behind where we went with him. We felt it was so much more compelling ... and truly more emotional that he totally has a get out of jail free card when he sacrifices everything (including his life, potentially) to save Carmen.

when she needs him most!

I know I made some controversial comments about Gray "not being good enough for Carmen" and I'd like to clarify that I meant, until that final episode. What he did was so selfless and heroic. Is there hope for them in the future? Who knows?! But I do hope we get to explore that one day

I'm sure Gray is living off the grid somewhere now, inspired by Carmen's selfless good and thinking of her from time to time.

PizzaHorse:

You mentioned in the interview with Alicyn that Carmen is a love story, but you were cut off before you could finish discussing. Could you elaborate on your answer now?

Duane Capizzi:

Ugh, yes! Sorry about that. I actually answered that privately for someone so will cut and paste that response here. Let's see if it works.

Something we never said in the show, but something I imparted to the creative team was: Carmen Sandiego is (among other things) a LOVE STORY, where every character in our ensemble is in love with Carmen in one way or another. Even if they don't know it! That love can take different forms: we see how spurned by Carmen Coach Brunt feels and why she retaliates so excessively. Chase eventually comes to realize that he too loves Carmen, even if he wasn't initially aware of it haha. One of the most moving things to me about the series is how all of the different factions come to Carmen's rescue at the end when she's not "in her right mind," without knowing the others are there too. It's a massive group effort to bring back the Carmen they love. But we weren't looking for a fairy tale ending for Carmen with ANYone - Carmen's a classic lone wolf anti-hero, that goes with the territory. At least at this stage in her journey.

PizzaHorse:

Were there other locations that you wanted to feature in the show that didn't make it?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we managed to cover a lot of ground and "cadence" between different countries/cultures/continents was important to us. Many "iconic" locations of course, and it would have been nice to explore some lesser known locations if we had more episodes.

One that we almost did was Niagara Falls, Canada - actually literally going to the Falls and doing a big hydro-electric caper, where Player could actually get into the field with Carmen and the team.

But ultimately, we wound up bringing Player into the fold the way we did and wound up stronger as a result. It made his "first face to face" with Carmen even more impactful, IMO.

PizzaHorse:

Were there any changes in production between the first half and the second half of the series?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there was that Covid thing

But while it was no doubt a colossal undertaking to get the entire staff transitioned to work from home (animators! and their equipment!), we managed to make up for lost time WITHOUT a dip in animation quality. My fedora's off to our amazing team at Wildbrain for pulling it off!

We did lose some staff between orders, but that is a natural part of production unfortunately. Namely, one of our episodic directors Kenny Park, our first storyboard artist Dennis Crawford, and our story editor May Chan were among those who moved on to other shows during the break. But, as hard as their shoes were to fill, fill them we did!

PizzaHorse:

What is your favorite season?

Duane Capizzi:

Easy. Hands down, Season 3.

(crickets)

KIDDING!

Again, another "they're all my babies" answer (and yes, I love Season 3 equally

It's hard, because really when you step back I'm sure you'll agree it's a series, with stand alone capers; but it's really all ONE BIG MOVIE.

Season 3 is like the scherzo of a symphony: the shortest movement of four, and the one that tees up the big finale.

That's my hoity toity answer but I'm going to put to rest all of the various theories on what happened with season 3. It was a combination of two things: Netflix's desire to experiment with different ways of "dropping" seasons, and their desire to do a holiday themed drop (in this case Halloween, naturally). It became our challenge to come up with a theme (easy enough: masks), and the bigger challenge to serve their need while not interrupting our ongoing narrative. A challenge to be sure, but a challenge met. I think the biggest bump was perception: it was a short season and I know that was disappointing to many. But, by design.

So, Season 3 = an essential part of the whole. I don't think there's a wasted episode, and it gets everyone into position for the big finish. I can't pick a favorite season - you can't make me

PizzaHorse:

Were there any characters you had wanted to give more time to but couldn't due to time/plot restraints?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there's the "what was on the white board" answer but hopefully some of those ideas will see the light of day in some way, shape or form some day. I think if we had more episodes, we would have shaken up the internal dynamic of VILE a bit more (as hinted at Brunt's displeasure with Maelstrom for leaving her hanging out to dry at end of 405 - a seed we planted "just in case," as some have noted). And we had more scenes in mind with Chase's partnering with Carmen for the first time that we had to cut to the bone because of what little room we had in that otherwise packed episode (worry not: it's mostly more gags, more embellishment, more twists and turns - but the important stuff is there). Mostly, and I don't think it would have been right for Season 4 but I hope to tell in the future, I think there's an interesting history between Shadowsan and Lady Dokuso - possibly tragic - that I would love to explore one day. (She was a cameo in Duke of Vermeer at the dinner party BTW, I'm not sure if anyone noticed. And we built a bigger role for her out of that)

PizzaHorse:

What are some pre-2000/nostalgic Carmen references you snuck into the show? Do you have a favorite reference that was included?

Duane Capizzi:

Doing that was so much fun! I'd say roughly 60% of the characters were from previous iterations of Carmen, though often in name only. We had fun reimagining most everyone to make them more relevant or updated or giving them a more colorful personality for starters.

"Suhara" was Carmen's Japanese mentor when she worked at the ACME Agency in a flashback episode in the 90's series, for instance. I don't think I need to spell out how we turned that one inside out

And Tigress was also one episode only: she was a "rival thief" to Carmen, but revealed to be an ACME agent in disguise - a persona created solely to bait Carmen. It was really cool of course, but it seemed like untapped potential so we made her an ACTUAL Vile Thief.

My own internal rule was to make sure the references/easter eggs wouldn't confuse anyone - they were there for those who were in the loop and window dressing. The one and only time i broke that rule was Dark Carmen's line from 407: "I do it for the mental gymnastics." It was one of the most absurd lines from the 90's series (IMO) and i was determined to have it come out of Dark Carmen's mouth. I'm sure it left some 7 year olds scratching their heads

aside from that, the key references were the music: I still tingle at how we worked the Rockapella theme into the Interactive Special; and the 90's main title theme (composed by Mozart!), in our Vienna episode ("They're playing my song"). If you wanted Rockapella or Carmen as a bad guy, well ... be careful what you wish for!

PizzaHorse:

Was there any improvised content from recording sessions that made it into any episodes?

Duane Capizzi:

Yes! Not much, because a lot of it would have pushed us into TV-MA haha

Mostly Mary Elizabeth - Coach Brunt has a POTTY MOUTH!

Mikey and Abby usually riffed their banter WAY beyond what was on the written page and had us in stitches. Some bits definitely made it in! But mostly there was too much or it would get off point (hmmm, much like my interview answers maybe? haha)

Sharon Muthu did rise to Pun Goddess status with "Mask and you shall receive." And Raf pitched me "Chasse means hunt in French" after one session and I said: "I'm going to write that in." I don't think he believed me. You can't say I'm not a straight shooter.

PizzaHorse:

If you could get more season, would you do it, and what type of story would you tell?

Duane Capizzi:

Well if that hasn't been clear so far, ABSOLUTELY

There have been discussions of course. It's up to the powers that be at this point. I will say this: the beauty and tradition so far has been that every iteration has been its own thing. I definitely think there are more "different canon" versions of Carmen that can be had and be a part of this wonderful tradition. After all, there were many naysayers for our version when it was first announced.

I will also say that if we don't get to tell any more stories in this canon with these characters, we've left a perfect gem that will stand the test of time. I would rather go out on a high note than overstay our welcome.

All that said, we worked within the allotted episodes given, ended it as we wished, but left the door open for other stories. I'd love to do an expansion and a deepening: pick up where we left off; find out what happened in those two years; and proceed to do the equivalent of Godfather II or Better Call Saul as related to the amazing originals they followed.

Let's hope! Keep putting good vibes out there!

PizzaHorse:

If you could pick a character on Carmen Sandiego who'd you switch places with for a day (you get to control their life and they get to control yours) who would you pick, and why?

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, THIS is difficult. So you're going Freaky Friday on me?

on a Sunday?

Hmmm, I know Ivy would get along with my cat ... but then I'd have to hang out with Zack!

That's the trick: I can't pick my favorites cuz I couldn't hang out with them!

(not that I have favorites - they're all my babies haha)

Okay, I have one: ROUNDABOUT. I could fill Shadowsan's seat - how cool is that? Then, I could enact all my evil fantasies - but still have a get out of jail free card cuz he'd be sitting at my desk!

(cut to Duane being brain wiped - D'oh!)

PizzaHorse:

Who are two characters who don't really interact in the show that you think could be good friends or work really well together?

Duane Capizzi:

Hmmmm. Okay, now I'm going to give you quick and sassy answers. Gray and Julia! They'd be so cute banding together to rescue captive Carmen (for instance). And they could also duke it out and maybe settle things between themselves re: shipping controversies instead of dragging me into it

PizzaHorse:

The FINAL QUESTION. Have you learned anything super impactful while working on the show?

Duane Capizzi:

Aside from Iceland's terrifically low crime rate?

I think I have learned to never underestimate how meaningful characters can be to fans. Social media has obviously brought us a lot closer to our fan base in more immediate ways: it's been really gratifying to hear/see/read feedback and not be writing things in a vacuum. It's been gratifying to see that ideas that were meaningful to myself and the creative team on Carmen that were crafted with care, have also resonated with our fan base. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE who has traveled on this journey with us - for embracing Carmen's world view, and her friends and foes alike. Take care everyone! Stay safe! This has been fun, thanks for having me!

PizzaHorse:

HUGE thank you to Duane Capizzi: for being here today.

Thank you everyone for watching and reacting!

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, gotta run - just gotta find the door

Anyway, really: THIS HAS BEEN AMAZING. I speak for everyone involved in the creation and production of Carmen: it has been an amazing and inspiring series and we're elated to see it connect with such a CREATIVE, TALENTED and INTELLIGENT fan base. Take care everyone! Until next crime...

[meanhoeforcb97]

Say My Name

Pairing: Bang Chan x Fem!Reader

Genre: Smut (and a bit of fluff at the end🙈)

Warnings: Hard Dom! Chan, Daddy/babygirl kink, oral (f), mentions of alchohol(??)

Words: 3.3k

Masterlist

I'm so embarrassed to post this eYE–

Let me know if you wanna see part 2 ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

★━━━━━━━━❍━━━━━━━━★

It was a lovely quite warm evening during the middle of March and your friend Leah had persuaded you into going out for a couple of drinks.

After your last relationship had come to a bad end a few months prior –almost a year– you hadn't been going out much as you weren't interested in a love life at the moment.

Which also ended up affecting your sex life and making it basically nonexistent.

So Leah was determined to change that.

She helped you pick out a dress and you both got ready at your house. She did your make up and you did hers, you were having a great time with one of your closest friends and you genuinely thought this would be a girls night. Little did you know what was about to take place only a few hours from now.

"Damn! You're fire!" You told Leah hyping her up and boosting her confidence. She was wearing a black, strapless and tight fitted dress with some fishnets and knee-high boots.

"You are not so bad yourself!" She said joking as she gestured towards your outfit which consisted of a red tight fitted off-the-shoulder dress that reached just a few inches above your knees and had a slit up your left thigh suggesting what was laying underneath paired with black stilettos.

You weren't really the type to dress up or go clubbing often but whenever you did, you honestly loved it! You loved how confident these sexy outfits made you feel. You loved the stares coming from men and women left and right. You loved the euphoric feeling of sex mixed with alcohol. Nights like these were the ones you strived to always remember.

So with one last check in the mirror you and your friend exited your house, locked the door behind you two and entered a passing cab. Both of you agreed that you wouldn't drive as you both planned to drink at least one glass. So to be safe, you called a taxi.

Arriving at the club, you both entered while holding hands as to not get lost between the sea of sweaty bodies grinding up against each other.

You hadn't even made it to the bar yet and you had already spotted a few hotties—this definitely wasn't gonna be a girl's night.

Leah sat on one of the stools and you sat right next to her and you both turned to the barman.

From the corner of your eye you notice how Leah was basically drooling, and in all honesty she had all the rights to. He was tall and incredibly gorgeous. He seemed to be quite young, at least younger than the two of you so you weren't planning on making any moves as for Leah, that's another story.

"So ... Hyunjin." She said reading his name tag.

"Yes miss, how could I help you?" He asked slightly leaning into the counter with a sky smirk on his face.

"My friend over here and I would like something to drink... give us your best drinks." She said placing some money on the counter and he looked at her hand pushing the bills.

"This one's on me, gorgeous." He said as he sent a wink her way and got to work.

She turned to you and you pouted, "What the actual fuck Leah? It hasn't even been 15 minutes since we entered and you already have found a hottie who will probably fuck the shit out of you later. What am I supposed to do?" You whined at her.

"Calm down okay? I'll help you! I'll find you a nice person to take care of you!" She said with a wink.

"How about this guy right there? The one with the blonde hair and green eyes? He looks fine!" She said and you bit your lip about to give in, but then saw a girl wrapping a hand around his waist and he leaned down and kissed her.

"Oh.." She let out dumbfounded and you sighed.

"Just forget it, I don't need any guy to show me fun! I can do it myself! I'm gonna dance!" You said trying to make her forget about it.

Just at that moment Hyunjin turned around and placed two glasses on the counter, you thanked him, grabbed yours and left right away.

The dance floor was busy with sweaty bodies dancing like crazy to the upbeat music blasting through the speakers.

Taking small and frequent sips of your drink, you found yourself letting loose to the music and your body moving according to the beat.

After a few of these drinks you were getting tipsy and you were dancing on your own for a long time now, deciding that was enough for now you went to leave when suddenly you almost bumped into a male figure.

And fuck, was he hot though?

"Oh oops, I'm sorry!" You said and went to leave.

"Its okay I wasn't looking! By the way love your dress!" He said as he winked at you and you smirked slyly.

"Well thank you, you look quite nice yourself." You said in a joking manner.

Being tipsy and all you continued to dance alone in front of the man's presence as he continued to talk with you.

And he couldn't help but stare in curiosity and lust.

You were so fucking hot he couldn't even comprehend how fuckable you looked all sweaty under the dim coloured lights of the club.

It made him think about you sweaty and under dim lights in a completely different scenario.

"So my names Chris, yours? Or should I call you gorgeous?" He asked in a flirting manner as he grabbed his lower lip between his teeth.

He proceeded to dance along to the music and waiting for an answer.

You couldn't help but scan the man from head to toe, his hair was a beautiful shade of dark brown matching with his eyes. His lips were plump and pink and he had adorable dimples that showed up whenever he smirked playfully at you. His body oh gosh his body was something you really wanted to explore. His exposed biceps were buff and veiny and it was obvious that the man worked out a lot.

You smirked and looked straight into his eyes and moved closer to his form still dancing.

"The names Y/n.. but you can call me whatever you want hottie" you said and proceeded to grind your ass against his thigh.

He bit his lip harder as his hands landed on the small of your waist.

"This is a dangerous game you're playing little girl.." he said through clenched teeth as he leaned so far in that your noses were almost touching and you could feel his breath fanning your lips. You leaned into his ear and let out a chuckle.

"Maybe this isn't the most dangerous it can get.." you said and captured his earlobe between your teeth.

Chris's grip on your waist tightened and his breath slightly hitched.

He pulled you back and kissed you on the lips. The kiss was rough and full of lust, your tongues fighting for dominance and yours winning for a second before he regained control. He bit and sucked on your lips and tongue making you let out tiny noises of satisfaction making him pull even closer to his body.

You were both a mess, making out in the middle of the dance floor and grinding against each other like wolves in heat.

"Wanna take this to my place?" He asked as he pulled away from your mouth panting.

You turned towards were your friend was sitting to see her still flirting with that Hyunjin guy. You took out your phone sent her a quick text and nodded at him.

He grabbed your hand and pulled you through the crowd, leading you outside he called a taxi and then turned to you and kissed you on the lips once again.

"You sure about this babygirl?" He asked making sure you were doing this with full consent.

"Babygirl huh?" You smirked slyly and leaned in towards his face.

"Sure thing daddy." You whispered into his mouth before biting his lip and he groaned in response grabbing your hips and bringing you closer.

You started making out in the parking lot and just when his hands travelled from your waist to the curve of your ass, the taxi arrived.

You both got in and continued making out at the backseat after Chris instructed the driver to get you two to his house.

Once the car came to a stop he paid for the ride and lead you inside by pulling on your hand.

Throwing your handbag by the door you turned to him only to have him pinning you up against the wall and sucking on your neck searching for your sweet spot.

Your legs immediately became wobbly and your hands found a tight grip on his biceps.

It took everything in you not to moan but when he sucked on that specific spot close to the center of your collarbones you couldn't help but let out a strangled whine.

You bit your hand embarrassed by the sound that came out of your mouth.

"Oh no babygirl! Let daddy hear your beautiful voice alright?" He said as he gave your lips a peck and moved his way downwards to your littered neck full of fresh marks.

Unzipping your dress and sliding it down, he stopped just above your stomach so your boobs would be freed.

He kissed on top of your cleavage and couldn't help but bury his face in them.

He quickly took off your bra throwing it somewhere in the livingroom.

He then proceeded to suck, lick and bite onto your right boob, paying extra attention to the erect nipple.

"Chris~" you couldn't help but moan his name as he worked wonders on your breasts.

"What was that babygirl?" He asked as he stopped.

"N-Nothing! Please don't stop!" You practically begged as you tried to pull his face close to your naked chest once again.

"I'm gonna let this slide just this once. But daddy won't be as generous next time! Understood?" He asked and you nodded desperately.

He had barely even touched you yet and you were already wet, your panties getting more and more soaked by the minute.

With a last squeeze and a kiss on your breasts he pulls away, took off his dress shirt and lead you to his bedroom.

The room was dimly lit by some side lamp on his desk and the bed was large, but that's just about everything you noticed before he pushed you on the bed and pinned your hands above you head.

Taking off the dress completely, he exposed your lower half which was covered by a thin layer of lace.

He smirked and licked his lips with lust and hunger mixed in his beautiful but dark irises.

"You planned on getting fucked tonight didn't you?" He asked as he pulled on the under garment's band and then let it slap against the beautiful and not to mention unmarked skin of your thighs.

"Well you ain't getting fucked by a little boy today, so why dont you let me show you how daddy fucks his little girl huh?" He said and you couldn't help but clench around thin air, your thighs closing and your butt squirming.

"Hmm, my  babygirl is so needy~" he cooed as he gripped your thighs and forcefully pulled them apart revealing your covered heat.

Chris quickly rid you of the last piece of clothing remaining on your body and his breath hitched in his throat as he saw your glistening wet flower.

He trailed kisses down the center of your chest to your tummy and lastly to your danger zone— but no! Chris wasnt gonna give it to you so easily.

He kissed all around your pussy and thighs avoiding your clit and entrance and kissing around it on the outer lips and inner thighs.

Leaving a few marks here and there as well your hips thrusted forward trying desperately to find some sort of friction.

He quickly pinned your hips down with his strong hands and finally looked straight into your eyes as he landed the first long and sharp lick across your slit.

You moaned loudly and he couldn't help but groan as he lapped up all of your arousal.

Focusing on your clit, he slipped one finger in your tight hole making you moan louder and pant heavier than before.

"Oh my gosh, keep going! Just like that!" You moaned as Chris hit your g-spot with his finger repeatedly.

He hummed against your clit causing the vibration to send waves of pleasure all over your body while at the same time he added a second finger.

All of the stimulation of your most sensitive parts soon enough drove you over the edge.

Chris sensed that you were close as your walls tightened around his fingers so he gave your clit one last strong suck and pulled his mouth and fingers away from you making you let out a cry of frustration as you lost your high.

"I swear to God if you don't finish what you started... I haven't had sex in freaking months!" You said as you sat up on your ass looking at Chris frustrated.

"Watch your mouth babygirl.." He said as he glared at you. You couldn't help but be intimidated by his naked and toned figure hovering over you.

"And don't worry I'm about to change that." He said with a smirk as he unbuckled his belt and proceeded to take off his jeans and briefs.

Once his member was out and free you couldn't help but squeeze your thighs together at the image of his red and angry dick standing tall against his toned stomach and leaking with pre-cum already.

"You caused this babygirl..." He growled as he came closer to you. "How do you feel about that?" He asked as gripped a fistful of your hair and tilted up your head to look straight into his eyes.

"Proud." Was all you said before he crashed your lips together in yet another sloppy make out session and he pushed you further into the bed.

You could feel his cock against your pussy and all you wanted and needed at that moment was him inside you and fucking you mercilessly.

"What do you want baby? Let me hear you.." He panted in your ear as he placed a condom around his erected cock.

"I want you Daddy! I want Daddy to fuck me till I cant think straight! To fuck me so good that I wont be able to walk for days!" You cried out and he groaned.

"Your wish is my demand..." he managed to growl out before plugging his thick and rock-hard cock into your swollen, wet cavern.

You both let out sighs of relief at the pleasure of him being inside you.

It was as if his cock was made just to be inside your pussy as he filled you to the brim and stretched you out oh so good.

Soon he started rocking his hips in the most delicious pace and your moans mixed with his.

The strong smell of sex inhabited the room and the sound of skin slapping against skin was loud.

He was fucking you so good. He was hitting all the right places and had you a moaning mess in no time.

"Faster daddy, faster!" You cried out as you felt your orgasm being just around the corner.

He groaned at the sound of your voice so desperate and so shamelessly begging for his cock.

Chris grabbed one of your legs and placed it over his shoulder. This new angle gave him the chance to explore your pussy in a whole different depth.

With this position you could feel him hitting your g-spot repeatedly once again making you basically scream in pleasure.

He looked at your beautiful face while trusting his hips deeply into your own and he couldnt help but moan at your fucked out expression and sweaty face. Your hair was disheveled and flying everywhere. And as his eyes travelled further down he watched as your boobs bounced from the hard rocking of his hips and just a little bit lower he saw as his dick was engulfed by your hungry vagina.

You were gorgeous.

He kissed your lips and sucked on your tongue as he brought a hand down to your entrance and rubbed inconsistent circles on your swollen clit.

You gasped and cried out at the newfound pleasure.

"Oh my gosh I'm so close! So close!" You managed to let out as you could feel the knot in your stomach tighten.

"Let go for daddy babygirl, let daddy see how much you enjoyed him fucking your tight little pussy." He said as he watched you intently and adding even more pressure to your clit.

You let out a strangled moan and gripped his biceps tightly slightly scratching him in a progress and came undone.

The orgasm was so intense that your body was shaking violently afterwards.

As you came, Chris could feel your walls tighten around his dick and his thrust got sloppier and sloppier as he continued fucking into you, chasing his own orgasm while at the same time helping you ride out yours.

To help him, you took down your leg from his shoulder and pulled him closer to you sucking on his neck leaving marks all over it.

He moaned in pleasure when you found his sweet spot and guided your hand to his balls, and you got the memo and massaged them.

He moaned even louder this time as his own orgasm wrecked his body. Coming into the condom he stopped his movements but stayed put inside you as he caught his breath.

Looking down at your face he leaned down to kiss you, both of your foreheads sweaty and with hair clinging onto your skin so he took a stranded and placed it behind your ear.

Placing his forehead on your own he sighed as he pulled his member out of your vagina and you squeezed your thighs together as your previously filled pussy lost its warmth and you trembled lightly.

He took off the condom and threw it away, he leaned down and placed a soft peck on your lips far different than the previous kisses you two shared.

"I'm gonna go grab something to clean you up alright? I'll be right back." He said and you nodded, he smiled and placed one last peck on your lips before leaving.

Laying there alone in his bed you felt your body slowly but surely start to drift in and out of conciousness as you felt completely and utterly exhausted.

At some point your eyes were closing in their own accord and you were almost asleep when suddenly the bed besides you dipped.

You forced your eyes open to see Chris sitting next to you, still completely naked, while holding a wet towel and a glass of water.

He helped you up to your butt and passed you the glass of water. You drank it all in one go and he took back the glass as he helped you lay down again.

"Such a good girl for me... taking my cock so well and cooperating with me.." he cooed at you as he grabbed the towel and placed it on your vagina softly.

The towel was warm making you relax under his gentle touch. He gently and carefully cleaned your vagina and thighs before folding the towel in half and with the clean side he proceeded to wipe the sides of your face, neck and chest.

He stood back up and pulled the duvet over you, placed a kiss on your forehead and left the room with the towel and the glass once again.

He came back soon after though and got under the duvet with you, you were turned away from him so he got this chance to hug you from behind and be the big spoon.

And at that you both fell into a peaceful dreamless sleep.